corrade-lsl-templates

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/source/eggdrop/corrade-eggdrop-joke.sql
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INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Jew in Nazi Germany and pizza ? Pizza doesn''t scream when you put it in the oven . I''m so sorry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently went to America.... ...and being there really helped me learn about American culture. So I visited a shop and as I was leaving, the Shopkeeper said "Have a nice day!" But I didn''t so I sued him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brian raises his hand and says, Hes in Heaven. A Sunday school teacher is concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, Where is Jesus today? Brian raises his hand and says, Hes in Heaven. Susan answers, Hes in my heart. Little Johnny waves his hand furiously and blurts out, Hes in our bathroom! The teacher is surprised by this answer and asks Little Johnny how he knows this. Well, Little Johnny says, every morning, my Dad gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells Jesus Christ, are you still in there?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You hear about the University book store worker who was charged for stealing $20,000 worth of books? He got caught trying to sell the two books to a freshman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it unknown on how pterodactyls urinate especially during flight? Because the p is silent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why women need legs? To avoid leaving tracks like a snail while walking.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked into a PETA adoption center and the receptionist asked me what kind of dog I wanted Apparently "Whatever''s low in cholesterol" was not the right answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did TV studios make words appear on screen before computers? Character actors!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You follow his fresh prints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember when you were a kid and when you cried your parents said, "I''ll give you a reason to cry"? I always thought they were gunna hit me, not that they were going to destroy the housing market 20 years later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, you can''t spell Valentine''s Day without... ... Anal Destiny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Happy try not to jump off a bridge day! Oh and it''s also Valentines day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boss said to me, "you''re the worst train driver ever. How many have you derailed this year?" I said, "I''m not sure; it''s hard to keep track."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I get a bird I''m naming it Trump cuz all they do is Tweet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to get a headjob for Valentines Day But my back was sore and I couldn''t reach.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother went into a coma after giving birth to twins When she woke up after 6 months and 3 days, the doctor told the mother: "While you were in a coma, we had your brother name your children. One is a boy, one is a girl." The mother, with a disappointed and angry look on her face told the doctor: "Why my brother? That guy is an idiot. So what did he name them?" The mother, expecting hideous names, prepared herself. "The girl, was named Denise." The mother thought, "Hey that wasn''t so bad. What about my boy?" The doctor said, "Denephew".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an exercise machine with a strobe light? An epileptical.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad has a heart of a lion ...and a lifetime ban from the local zoo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smaller babies may be delivered by a stork. But the bigger, heavier ones are delivered by a crane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A monkey is getting stoned in a zoo... Welcome to India', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the mommy bean say to her son when he asked for money? I dont have any, go ask your fava', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When You Break Up At 11:59 Tonight And save $300 instantly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to buy an Audi. But I can''t A4''d it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m Trying to Remember The Name of A Song It''s about a girl with amnesia talking to her Grandmother. The lyrics are "Oh, Nana, What''s My Name?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are minorities? Lesser people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Donald Trump is technically a plant? Because all of his cells have built a wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i had trouble swallowing a viagra last night my neck was stiff for 4 hours', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the king of all school supplies? The Ruler', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female !! A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mail box. She opened it, slammed it shut, and stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house and again went to the mail box and again opened it, then slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, Is something wrong? To which she replied, There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps giving me a message saying, YOUVE GOT MAIL!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman runs into a doctors office and says DOCTOR! DOCTOR! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts! A woman runs into a doctors office and says DOCTOR! DOCTOR! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts! The doctor replied, Show me. So the woman poked her ankle and screamed of pain. Then she poked her knee and yelled OW. She poked her forehead and screamed again. She was about to continue when the doctor said, Thats enough, let me think this over. He thought for about a minute and said I think I know what your problem is. You broke your finger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 30);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the producers of 007 films use government debt to fund their newest film? Because interest in the Bond is so low.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 31);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pocket empty day ! Happy pocket empty day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 32);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to see that new movie coming out with Scarlett Johannson& &but she probably isn''t available.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 33);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man gets lost in the desert. He has no compass and he has lost his sense of direction. Suddenly he sees a caravan on the horizon. He jumps, shouts and waves his arms to get their attention, and, oh joy, they notice him and move in his direction. But his happiness is short lived, as the travelers turn out to be mean and sadistic. They rough him up, and then bury him in the sand with only his head above the surface. He grimly contemplates whether he''ll die of sun stroke, dehydration or from attack of some savage beast. Suddenly, a lone traveler appears in front of him and inquires about his predicament. **You see, first I got lost, without a compass and provisions. Then I encountered these sadists, who beaten me up, bury me this way and left... Can you believe such behavior?** **Tsk, tsk...** says the traveler, as he puts his foot on top of the man''s head and pushes it under the surface **Amateurs, such amateurs...**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 34);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese Girl? You have to drop the Bomb twice before she gets the Message.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 35);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Site of the 2017 Dane county massacre. All that is left after tens of snowmen were brutally melted on this spot by a massive indifferent ball of fire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 36);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He fucked what? A small child asks his father: Boy: Dad, where did I come from? Dad: The Stork, son. Boy: what''s wrong with you dad? Your wife is so gorgeous yet you''re out fucking The Stork?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 37);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife wants to eat somewhere shes never eaten before for V-Day I told her she should try the kitchen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 38);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was offered sex with a 21 yr old today In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner. Of course I declined, because I am a person with high moral standards and strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available with scented lemon or vanilla.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 39);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 women talk "The other day I touched my husband''s balls and realized that they are cold. Never noticed before!" - says the first. Next day the second woman tells to the others: "That''s true! I touched my husband''s balls and they are also cold. It''s curious." Next day the third woman appears with her eye blacked. "What happened?" - her friends wonder. "Well, I touched my husband''s balls and then asked him why his balls are warm but all other men have them cold."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 40);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two types of people The ones who bang on the wall, And the ones who bang on the wall because I''m banging my girlfriend on the wall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 41);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the computer squeak? Someone stepped on its mouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 42);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i found a place where the recycling rate is 98%. Your moms bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 43);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel so bad for the necrophiliac''s sister She died a virgin but she sure wasn''t buried one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 44);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between you and a Calendar? A Calendar has a date on Valentine''s day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 45);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Julian Lennon messed up breakfast He tried to make eggs. He broke the yoke. Yoke! Oh! Oh no!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 46);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a place where the recycling rate is 100% This post.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 47);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I''m a dog. Happy Valentine''s Day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 48);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear the Mexicans are planning an attack on America Don''t worry, we have our Trump card.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 49);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought my friend an elephant for their room. They said thank you. I said don''t mention it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 50);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re laughing because I''m laughing. But I''m laughing braces I just farted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 51);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy proposed to his wife after walking away from a terrible car accident without a scratch. He said "Life''s too short and it can end at any time." She said "Honey, we''ve been married for 7 years. I think you have amnesia."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 52);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL you can drink lava But only once', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 53);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First woman on mars. Houston we have a problem...OK what is it? If you don''t know already I am not going to tell you. You wouldn''t understand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 54);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recipe idea: rosemary and thyme lamb, without the thyme. I give you, "The Lamb That Thyme Forgot"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 55);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the two most common names of Mexican fire-fighter? Jos and Hose B.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 56);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ice Cube was asked if there was a rock band from the 80''s of which he would have sex with all the members of... ... and he said "Fuck the Police"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 57);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad Advertisement Apparently using the words "Never opened" is no good, when trying to sell a parachute..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 58);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red. Cacti are thorny I just can''t help that You make me horny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 59);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These reports of a major snowstorm hitting the Northeast don''t concern me. It''s all just flake news.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 60);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you ask? A young Native American boy goes up to the chief of his tribe and asks "Chief, how did we get our names?" The Chief looked at the boy and said "Oh, that''s simple. All parents in our tribe named their children after something that was occurring during their birth. For example, Snowflake was born during a great blizzard. Ember was born during a raging wildfire. Why do you ask, Two Dogs Fucking?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 61);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Those ads actually ran. Yep, that''s the joke. Funny how reality has become a joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 62);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Burnt my Hawaiian pizza today Should have cooked it on aloha temperature', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 63);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the camel called the ship of the desert? Because its full of Arab semen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 64);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor''s office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it... A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor''s office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it. ''Impossible!'' says the doctor. ''Show me.'' The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream. The doctor said, ''You''re not really a redhead, are you? ''Well, no'' she said, ''I''m actually a blonde.'' ''I thought so,'' the doctor said, ''Your finger is broken.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 65);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a women say after having 3 orgasms in a row? Yeah I figured you wouldn''t know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 66);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The towns being evacuated under the Oroville Dam all voted Pro-Trump. Clearly those people love to live in constant fear of disaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 67);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Man Gets Really Drunk A man gets really drunk at a bar and asks the bartender for the bathroom. The bartender points to the bathroom and the man complains about having to take a serious shit and runs towards it. A few minutes later the man screams in agony, stops, then screams again. The bartender goes to check it out and yells to the man, "What the hell is going on?" "Everytime I press the lever, I feel like my balls are getting crushed!" the drunk yells. "You drunk bastard," the bartender replies, "you''re sitting on the mop strainer again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 68);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best thing about living in Switzerland? I don''t know... but the flag is a big plus. <<', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 69);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about Leatherface''s jewish cousin? He was also a serial killer. He liked to dig up the corpses of women and use their skin to furnish his house. After the police arrested him they discovered a whole morbid collection of objects. He had a belt made out of ears, a lampshade made from stitched together faces, they even found a labia menora.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 70);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A milestone Is one mile closer to the stone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 71);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I floss religiously. I do it on Christmas and Easter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 72);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think everyone on 4chan was a virgin, But this Guy Fawkes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 73);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What part of the house got busted for drugs? The attic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 74);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Manager : So do you think you''d be a good waiter? Me : well, you could say I bring a lot to the table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 75);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An optometrist asks a woman out on a date I have a couple of ideas: 1: Dinner 2: Movies 1 or 2? 1.. 2..? 1..... or 2?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 76);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Chinese godfather? He made him an offer he couldn''t understand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 77);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pair of jumper cables walks into a bar The bartender sighs and says; "I''ll serve you, but don''t start anything!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 78);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many South Americans does it take to change a light bulb? A Brazilian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 79);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have been trying to talk to dolphins for years. One day it just clicked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 80);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say only men and lesbians can be funny... Must be something in the pussy they''re eating', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 81);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats long and hard and full of semen? A Submarine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 82);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, how do you know if someone is drunk? Dad: Look son, you see those two people walking by?, if I had seen 4, I would''ve been drunk. Son: But dad, there''s only one person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 83);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scientist install a knocker on his/her door? He/she wanted to win the no-bell prize.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 84);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is shopping for cattle in 1886... He finally settles on a perfect Black Angus bull. He says to the owner "Here''s the money. I need to send a message to my wife to come pick up the bull. She already knows where I am but I need her to come pick him up now before it gets dark. Where can a fella send a telegram?" The owner tells him that he has a machine but it is $100 a word. "That''s outrageous! I only have $100." The owner says to him "Better make it good then." The man thinks for a few minutes and plops down the cash. "Send her this word: Comfortable." The owner of the bull looks confused and asks "How will that tell her anything?" To which the man replies "Well my wife can barely read, so she''ll just read it reeeeeeal slow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 85);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought of the first Fleshlight As it turns out it already existed but i came to it on my own', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 86);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, are you sure he was Dead? Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? A: No. Q: Did you check for blood pressure? A: No. Q: Did you check for breathing? A: No. Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? A: No. Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor? A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless? A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere. z PS. This is actual testimony from a trial...........', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 87);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are the dinosaurs afraid of Gordon Ramsey? He took a bite from one of his prey and complained that it was "FUCKING RAAAAAAWWWWW!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 88);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lot of women turn into great drivers... So if you''re a great driver, look out for women who are turning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 89);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentines Day Flowers Blonde #1: Oh how I hate when he brings me flowers. All night I''ll be on my back with my legs in the air. Blonde #2: Don''t you own a vase?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 90);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#1 Uconn women''s team going for historic 100th consecutive team in a sold out stadium against #6 South Carolina Espn2', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 91);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the outrage over the rapist getting four years? And he gets to live in the White House to boot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 92);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sure Fire Pickup Line Get in the car bitch&&I got a gun!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 93);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Michael Brown cross the road? He didn''t. He''s dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 94);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The term OP on r/Jokes Is pretty ironic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 95);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m an avid supporter of the Flat Earth Society! I always have heated debate about it with my friend residing in the other hemisphere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 96);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People in California... At first, people in California were like "Oh, we don''t have enough water!" and now they''re like "Oh, we have too much water!" ___ They can''t make up their *dam* minds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 97);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took ribeye to the top of Everest... The steaks could not be higher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 98);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man finally buys tickets to bring his family to the super bowl... He excitedly sits down in his seat and his family takes their seats to his right. The game is about to start and he notices the seat next to his left is empty. He leans over to the guy a seat over and says, ''Hey man, did you buy this seat? Who would miss the super bowl!?'' The man says to him, ''Yeah, I bought it for my wife but she passed away.'' The first guy says, ''Oh, man, I''m so sorry to hear that... didn''t you have a family member or friend that wanted the seat? I mean... It''s the super bowl.'' The man says, ''Yeah, there were a few, but they''re all at the funeral.'' *****I know its a month late, but a co-worker just told me this and his jokes are usually terrible grandpa-level jokes, so I had to post it.*****', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 99);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do the riot police show up at concerts early? To beat the crowd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Would you say 5 plus 7 is 13 or 5 plus 7 are 13?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jaws Two guys are hitchhiking down the highway. At the same time an older couple is driving on the same road. The man has diarrhea something fierce. Every few miles he has his wife pull into a service station. Finally she gets tired of this and tells him Im not stopping. If you have to go that bad, hang your ass out the window and go. So the man does this as theyre passing the hitchhikers, one of which gets the full load on him. Damned snooze chewers!!! he yells. But his partner says Yeah, but did you see the JAWS on that sumbitch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My substitute teacher had diarrhea... She couldn''t control her Pewp Hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex Statistics on a Plane. A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They exchange brief hellos and he notices she is reading a manual about sexual statistics. He asks her about it and she replies, "This is a very interesting book about sexual statistics. It identifies that American Indians have the longest average penises and Polish men have the biggest average diameter. By the way, my name is Jill. What''s yours?" He coolly replies, "Tonto Kawalski, nice to meet you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('YEE HAWWW LETS ROUND UP ALL THEM DIRTY N- Crowd : D:< Me: Nazis. . . . . Crowd: *Sigh of relief* Me: Especially Hans . . . . .Fuck Hans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police arrested two guys in the riots. One for looting batteries, the other for throwing fireworks. They charged one and let the other off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bitch ate my cookie, now the bitch is dead Apparently chocolate is bad for dogs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard of the new LGBTQ Music Awards? Yeah, theyre going to name it The Trannies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pal is a comedian. He woke me up late last night and asked if I could write a few gags for his set in a couple of days, because his mom just died and he was busy with her funeral. I agreed to help him out and asked if he had a topic in mind. He said, sorry, I''m too upset to be thinking about chocolate right now. Looks like I''m going to need help.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the hungry baby calf cross the road? To get to the udder side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got kicked out of a grocery store... for taking a leek in the vegetable aisle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a Woman with no arms or legs? Nice Tits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Measurements A man and his wife were outside their house doing yardwork. The husband looked over at his wife bent over her flower bed and said "ya know honey, I never really noticed how big your ass is. Why, I bet it''s just as wide as the range on the grill." To prove his point, the man went and grabbed the tape measure out of his toolbox. First he measured the width of the grill then his wife''s bottom. "Yep, just as thought. It really is as big as the grill." The wife got offended and stormed back into the house. Later that night, laying in bed, the husband started feeling frisky. He put his arm around hia wife and said "hey honey, what do ya say we fool around a little bit?". The wife turned to face him and said "Now why would I fire up this big ol'' grill for one little weenie?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] Did you hear about the guy whose house was overrun with cats? Apparently it was more pussy than he could handle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am going out with my valentine tonight I wish I could post it on different sub', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been suffering from an extreme form of memory loss alt-zheimers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A distraught man goes to his doctor and says "Doc, there''s a piece of lettuce sticking out of my butt!" The doctor asks him to drop his pants and examines him. The man asks: "Doc, does it look serious?" The doctor replies: "Sorry to tell you, but it''s just the tip of the iceberg."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the hostage situation at the spice factory? They used a cumin shield.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You look for the fresh prints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I first realized we were a poor family when on my birthday I asked for the new sweet iphone. And got a candy apple.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Harry Potter were about pirates: "It''s Levi-O-sARRRRRRR"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American and a Chinese were arguing about which government was better The American boasts, "clearly the American government is better. You can go to the white house with a megaphone and yell ''Trump sucks!'' and you wouldn''t even be arrested." The Chinese replied, "what of it? You can go to Tiananmen square and yell ''Trump sucks!'' and you still wouldn''t be arrested."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When m''y girlfriend said let''s not bother and do nothing this year for valentine''s day I agreed and realised way later that included sex', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s hard to believe I can smoke five cigarettes on a two mile walk to work... But it''s not that I''m a chainsmoker, it''s just the COPD makes me walk really slow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife told me "For Valentine''s Day, nothing would make me happier than a diamond necklace" So I got her nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('US Politics are Hillaryous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are time and money Women = time " money Time is money Women = money^2 Money is the root of all evil Therefore Women = Evil', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a ninjas favorite drink? WWWAAAATTTAAAAr...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pecan walks into a library... The librarian says, "so do you live in one of those little round houses? Pecan says, in a nutshell, yeah!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be a fan... But now I''m just an air conditioner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was looking for the perfect Valentine''s Day card when something caught my eye. One of the cards said "I love you and only you" I know this doesn''t sound strange but it was a pack of 20 cards', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is very anti-kids and I finally got her to agree on how many kids we''ll have We''re having two litters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump makes the best deals. Right now he''s negotiating for a better interest rate on Daylight Savings Time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 old ladies are sitting on a bus The first one says - it''s windy. Second one says - it''s not Wednesday, it''s Thursday. Third one says - yea, I''m thirsty too, we should buy something to drink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your girlfriends a keeper If she wears gloves, soccer jersey and cleats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve never done drugs before. I sidled up to the local drug dealer on the corner ... can I get an ounce of cocaine? look pal, I only sell grams! fuck it, give us an ounce of grams then!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats 12 inches long, purple and makes women scream in the middle of the night? Crib death', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need help writing a BDSM joke. I''m having trouble working out all the kinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats black and screams? Stevie Wonder answering the iron', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When did the man know it was time to dump his fat GF? When he realized it just wasn''t going to work out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you have a high sperm count? She chews before she swallows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I''m dating this girl who has a twin sister, and one night I got confused and ended up fucking her dad... :/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red Violets are blue Ive got genital warts soon you will too', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple are walking in St. Petersburg square on Christmas Eve. They start to feel some light precipitation "I think it''s raining" says the man "No it''s snowing" replies the woman. "How about we ask this communist officer here?" "He is always right" exclaims the man. "Officer Rudolph, is it raining or snowing?" "Definitely raining" officer Rudolph replies before walking off. The man turns to his wife and says. "See? Rudolph the red knows rain, dear"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend doesn''t know any Metallica songs She couldn''t name One', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have an inferiority complex but it''s not a very good one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three types of boobs A family was at the dinner table. The son asked his Father: "Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?? Surprised, the father answered:"Well, son, there are three kinds of Boobs" "In her 20''s, a women''s boobs are like Melons, round and firm." "In her 30''s to 40''s, they are like Pears, still nice but hanging a bit." "After 50, they are like Onions." Son: "Onions??" Father: "Yes, you see them and they make you cry." This made his Wife and Daughter Mad, so the Daughter asked her Mom: "How many kinds of Penises are there?" The Mother smiled and said,"Well dear, a man goes through 3 phases." "In his 20''s, his penis is like an Oak Tree, Mighty and Hard." "In his 30''s and 40''s, it is like a Birch, Flexible but Reliable." "After 50''s, it is like a Christmas Tree." Daughter: "Christmas Tree??" Mom: "Yes, the Tree is Dead and the Balls are just For Decoration!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how you can cut wood just by looking at it? You saw it. You saw it with your own two eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 nuns die and go to heaven... They''re greeted warmly by the big pearly gates. The welcoming angel is holding a big bowl of water. He asks the first nun - have you ever touched a man''s penis? The first nun trembles and says yes, she touched a penis but only with her fingers. Dip your fingers into the holy water and you will be pure, instructs the angel. The nun dips her fingers in the water and is allowed through the big pearly gates. The angel turns to the second nun and asks - did you touch a man''s penis? Before she could answer, the third nun blurts out - eww, I''m not drinking that water after it goes up her ass!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nurse walks up to the Doctor The nurse walks up to the doctor and asks... Doc, what are you doing? Doc says... I''m writing a prescription. Nurse says, but you''re holding your thermometer. Doc looks at her and says God Damn it some asshole has my pen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I met a Soldier that survived Mustard Gas and Pepper spray He was a seasoned Veteran', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One snow day a mother is making brownies for her kids She accidentally knocks her youngest son''s jar of bb''s into the brownie mix. She says "oh it''ll be alright" Several hours after the brownies were done her youngest son comes to her with tears in his eyes and says "Mommy, when I was using the restroom I was peeing and something hard came out." She said "Oh it was just a BB, you''ll be alright." Half an hour later she''s cleaning and she hears sobbing coming from the bathroom, she sees her daughter and asks what''s wrong. Her daughter says "I think I have kidney stones." The mom replies "oh it was just a BB, you''ll be alright." Later that night she hears her oldest son laughing and says "Let me guess, you were peeing and a BB came out?" He says "No I was beating off and shot the dog!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is served whiskey on a flight A man is served whiskey on a flight. The flight attendant asks the priest seated next to him, whether he would like a drink too? Priest: I would rather be raped by a dozen prostitutes than let liquor touch my lips The man returns the drink saying: Me too, I didn''t know we had a choice...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you castrate Vladimir Putin? Kick Donald Trump in the chin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Ancient Egyptians build Great Pyramids? Because their Great Igloos melted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock KNOCKIN ON HEAVENS DOOOWUUUWAAAAAAA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of investment do chemists prefer? They have an affinity for bonds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. D J Trump: Fake News!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lesbian cavewoman? A Troglodyke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one boat say to the other? Are you up for a little row-mance?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Colleagues A female student walks down the street of a college town. She had a stressful day and is dying to smoke a cigarette, but her lighter simply won''t work. Then she notices a few young women hanging out on street corner. She''s shy, but eventually works up a courage to approach them. Out of nervousness she blurts out: **Dear colleagues, I was wondering if you had a light?** One of the women produces a lighter, and the student walks away, puffing away happily. The women watch her go, and finally one remarks: **Puts out once, and now we''re "colleagues"...** Let the downvotes begin... ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is suing Male enhancement giant Viagra.. He says it''s a rigged erection', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael Flynn bumps into Donald Trump Pardon me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do Mexicans feel about Trumps wall? They''re already over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('an American and a Australian are in the trenches the American asks: did you come here to die the Australian says back: no i came here yesterday', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? "No". I thought not. It''s not a story the jedi would tell you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Communism. Master race.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God, I wish that Id used a condom now. My wife walked in to the room when I was in the middle of a furious argument with our son. When he ran out of the room crying, I said to my wife, God, I wish that Id used a condom now. My wife was aghast and said, What! You mean you wish that our son had never been born? I said, No, Ive got his girlfriend pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a dozen cup-cakes from a bakery. I got them home, opened the box and thought... that''s odd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish man walks into a builders merchant He gets a tin of paint and puts it on the counter, then pays the cashier; the cashier asked if he''d like a bag for it. He says: "don''t you worry, it''s fine in the tin"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Swede, an Icelander and a Norwegian end up shipwrecked on a deserted island. One day, as they are scouring the beaches for firewood, they come across an old oil lamp, washed ashore. The Swede picks it up and wipes it gently with his shirt sleeve, clearing the sand and the dirt. Out pops a spirit. The spirit says: "I have been trapped inside that lamp for a millennium due to a magic spell. Finally I have been set free. As a token of my gratitude, I will grant you one wish each." The Swede states that he is fed up with that little island and he would like to go back to Trelleborg. Poof, the Swede is gone. Next up is the Norwegian. He says: "I agree. I want to go home too, back to Narvik." Poof, the Norwegian vanishes. Now only the Icelander is left. After some pondering, he makes his wish. "It''s too lonely out here all by myself. I want my friends back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to hate the ballet Now I just watch like nobody''s dancing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the kidnapping in the park the other day? He woke up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the death The Monkees'' Davy Jones... I''d like to offer mickydolenzes to his family.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Doc Brown say when he tastes good booze? "Great scotch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you find a blind guy at a nudist colony? It''s not hard...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump & Trudeau Donald Trump and Justin Trudeau were we discussing politics when Donald leans in close and says: Donald: You know Justin, if the US were a Dictatorship I would be a Dictator. Justin: Yea, I suppose so Donald. Donald: And you know if the US were a Monarchy I would be a Monarch. Justin: That''s also true Don, but I hate to break it to you, the US is a Country.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In honor of Valentine''s Day - what''s better than a rose on a piano? Tulips on an organ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Twin sisters just turned 100 years old Twin sisters just turned one hundred years old in St. Luke''s Nursing Home and the editor of the Cambridge rag, "The Cambridge Distorter," told a photographer to get over there and take the pictures of these 100 year old twin bitteys. One of the twins was hard of hearing and the other could hear quite well. The photographer asked them to sit on the sofa and the deaf one said to her twin, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" He said, "WE GOTTA SIT OVER THERE ON THE SOFA!" said the other. "Now get a little closer together," said the cameraman. Again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" "HE SAYS SQUEEZE TOGETHER A LITTLE." So they wiggled up close to each other. "Just hold on for a bit longer, I''ve got to focus a little," said the photographer. Yet again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" "HE SAYS HE''S GONNA FOCUS!" With a big grin the deaf twin shouted out, "OH MY GOD - BOTH OF US?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever gone out on a first date and she tells you she never sleeps with anyone until at least the third date? That''s just her way of getting two more dates out of you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a musician, I''ve learned the best way to win a Grammy... ...is to not release your music in the same year as Adele.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a diploma My parents keep telling me to get one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Adele''s groupies? The infadeles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a person in love with a pie Piesexual!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you spell the word "man" backwards Flashbacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the white girl count by odds to ten? Because she can''t even', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a place where the recycling rate is 52% Switzerland', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Oroville dam catastrophe is Trump''s fault No manmade structure was designed to hold back that many liberal tears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So people don''t confuse them with feminists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you encourage a bear to eat cheese? C''mon bear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''d the cowboy say when he walked into the German car dealership? Audi...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('American, German and Bosnian guys compete... American, German and Bosnian guys compete who will fart out a wine bottle cap the furthest. American goes first, eats 1 bowl of beans and farts out the cap 5 feet. German goes next, eats a cauldron full of beans and farts the cap 17 meters. Bosnian goes last, eats 1 bean and farts. They couldn''t find the cap and they give up. The next day on the news: "An UFO size of a wine bottle cap hits and kills a Japanese civilian!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the house I grew up in and wanted to look around I knocked on the door and asked if I could, the people just slammed the door in my face. My parents can be so rude sometimes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the orchestra teacher angry? Her students were pizzing her off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An advertiser for coke is dispatched to Israel When he comes back, his friend asks him how it went. He replies that it did not go well. "What happened?" his friend asked. "Well, since I didn''t know hebrew, I decided to convey the ad through a comic. The first panel showed a guy in a desert, dying of thirst. The secone panel showed him drinking coke. And the third panel showed him completely rejuvenated." "That sounds great! Why didn''t it work?" "Nobody told me they read right to left!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just finished the first semester in college and here is a list of things I failed at: 1.) The 1st semester', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the bakery that spent too much on cakes? They ended up with an antoinette loss!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother said that I''m indecisive I couldn''t understand where that came from, so I asked people. "It''s because you like both dogs and cats" said my boyfriend. "No, no, no. It''s because she likes both tea and coffee" said my girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please pray for my daughter''s soul She was born a red head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it. I''m sorry. My mom taught me that joke and told me that every birthday and it''s my birthday today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Trump''s least favorite periodic element? Just Tin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An interviewer asks a shepard Interviewer: How much milk do these cows give? Farmer: Which one? The Black ones or the brown ones? Interviewer: Brown ones. Farmer: A couple of litres per day. Interviewer: And the black ones? Farmer: A couple of litres per day. Interviewer(naturally a bit flummoxed): I see. What do you give them to eat? Farmer: Which ones? Black or brown? Interviewer: Black. Farmer: It eats grass. Interviewer: And the other ones? Farmer: Grass. Interviewer(now annoyed) : Why do you keep asking which one when the answers are the same?! Farmer: Because the black ones are mine. Interviewer: Oh, and the brown ones? Farmer: they are also mine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jon: walks out from the bathroom- "Hey man sorry I took so long, I was just fixing my hair" Me: "Then what happened? Did you decide not to give a fuck??"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The last man sat in a room. There was a knock at the door... It was a lawyer. Edit: The last human on Earth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would like to propose a toast! For honor... If you can get honor. Stay honor. But if you can''t come in her, Come honor. For honor!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bunny comes to Bear''s bakery... He asks for a cabbage pie. Bear tells him they don''t have that kind of pie. It repeats for a few days. Bear takes pity on Bunny and tells his wife, who does the baking: >Please, bake a cabbage pie for Bunny. He comes in every day asking for it. So the next day, Bunny is there again. >Do you have a cabbage pie? &nbsp; >Yeah, we do! &nbsp; >It''s just gross, right?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How deep do the Sandusky genes run? All the way to boys size 12.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma''s so stupid She tried to use politics to determine if a vector field was conservative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife left me after being seduced by an Asian guy. He''s a real Dong Wong. I''ll just show myself out...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a playing card and Africa? One is the ace of spades, the other is the space of aids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do all women at the womens marches have in common? They don''t want the D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the seamonster''s favourite meal? Fish & Ships', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the news about corduroy pillows? They''re making headlines', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m really torn on abortions... On the one hand, I support it because it''s killing babies. On the other hand, it gives women a choice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The environment is so bad. Dihydrogen monoxide now covers 70% of Earth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get stuck bubble gum out of your hair? Cancer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ran over a Deer.... ....dear dear old man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is pasta month? I need to mark my colander.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate when people misuse "it''s" and "its" Tits very annoying', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL: 80% of people will believe a fact if it has a percentage in it Or so I''ve been told', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by being dyslexic and kidnapping 42 people Sorry, wrong bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Putting it in. A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, ''I almost had an affair with another woman.'' The priest said, ''What do you mean, almost?'' The Irishman said, ''Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.'' The priest said, ''Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You''re not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary''s and put $50 in the poor box.'' The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, ''I saw that. You didn''t put any money in the poor box!'' The Irishman replied, ''Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that''s the same as putting it in!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s red and bad for your teeth? A Brick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If any of you are sad about being alone on valentines day, just remember... that nobody loves you on any other day of the year, and valentine''s day shouldn''t be any different.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is everyone scared of my hard drive? Because it has a terabyte.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the most destructive dinosaur of the prehistoric era? *Tyrannosaurus Wrecks*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What advice did the family therapist give to Jerry Sandusky Jr.? Always remain in-touch with the community.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tomorrow, I''m going to go to my girlfriend, get on one knee, present flowers and a ring, and say... "My love for you is like these flowers and this ring. It''s gonna wither and die by the end of the month and is also insanely overvalued."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did you know that the exterminator was attracted to termites? Because he pitched a tent whenever he saw one...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is your refrigerator running? If it''s not, you better check the connections on the back, or call a maintenance guy. Hopefully you didn''t lose power. I''d make sure to get it figured out soon so your food doesn''t go bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why isn''t Hitler playing in Esports? I wonder why Hitler haven''t been invited to a Epsorts event yet. His KD ratio was 6,000,000 to 1.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I might''ve just wrote the greatest joke of all time. But I think I''m gonna wait until someone else posts it here first though...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Fiora always banned? Great Reposte no counterplay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ravens and Crows A good friend told me a story once. When she was a kid her family would often go to zoos and museums while on vacation. They were in the aviary on one of those visits looking at birds. My friend saw a crow asked the zookeeper a question. "What''s the difference between a raven and a crow?" The zookeeper looked at her, smiled and started to answer. "Have you ever heard of a pinion feather?" he said. "Pinions are the the feathers at the tip of a bird''s wing that allows it to fly. They are also the ones that people will trim to prevent birds from flying away. Crows have 5 pinion feathers while ravens have 6. So, if you think about it, it''s really just a matter of a pinion." To this day, my friend and her family don''t know the real answer to "What''s the difference between a crow and a raven?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A government man is walking his way to work... As he carries his heavy suitcase, a Russian woman comes up to him with a whiskey bottle in her hand and says, "I''ll jerk your dick while you chug this, deal?" The man, not even thinking about the situation, agrees instantly and they rush off to the restroom, find a stall, and start doing it. While being jerked, he caps of the whisky bottle and starts chugging. A moment after, he starts feeling funny and dozes off to sleep. He wakes up, unknown of the time that has passed, and looks down only to realize his pants and underwear is gone, including his suitcase. Horrified, he runs out of the restroom, his thong going everywhere and ''bout, and yells, "Help! Help! I''ve been jacked!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can February march??? No, but April may.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best way to get bubblegum out of your hair? Cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call her when St. Nick''s wife dumps him to join a biker gang? A rebel without a Claus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re a very beautiful girl ... and you have a nice personality and a beautiful smile Girl: you just wanna get into my pants Boy: you''re intelligent as well.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are women attracted to intelligent men? Opposites attract', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m obsessed with pushing my penis between my legs and pretending I''m a woman. It all started when my dad used to tuck me in at night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you always use your middle finger on a woman? Because a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didnt like my beard at first Then it really grew on me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you Samarium, Arsenic, and Hydrogen? because I want to SmAsH', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of planes do rappers fly? Spitfire', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: (To Reddit) will you be my valentine ??? Reddit : " I am married and i have many childs (SubReddits) "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jeff won 20 million dollars But he did not know about it and his family did. They were afraid that if they told him he would have a heart attack, so they chose his favourite brother Ted to tell him easily. "If you won 20 million dollars, what would you do with them?" Said Ted. "I would give you half of them" said Jeff. Today is Ted`s funeral.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Math class Teacher asks Johnny: "Imagine you have $200. And you give $50 to Jane, $50 to Suzi, $50 to Melissa. What would you have?" "An orgy?" Edited: names spelling, grammar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do bread cells divide? They sbread apart through mitoastis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyones keeps teasing me about being so damn lazy I just can''t do this anymore. I think I''m just going to kill myself. But the gun is like... way over there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('!false It''s funny cause it''s true.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? Zero.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex I know, I don''t get it either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m selling an authentic French rifle.. It was never fired and only dropped once.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: A movie theatre has just been robbed of over two thousand dollars The theives took a large soda and two bags of popcorn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to properly propose to a stoner Marriage-you-wanna?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bartender asks the first one "What can I get you?" Two race conditions walk into a bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two gay men in are having sex..... Two gay men are having sex in bedroom. After a while one of them decides that he needs a break and goes to bathroom. The second one thinks he''s away for too long so he goes to check him. When he finds him in bathroom, whole room is covered with semen. He asks with anger: ''Why didn''t you wait for me?!'' but second one sort of surprised answers: ''Oh you mean that? I just farted....''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pea wonder before an 8 hour road trip? To pee or not to pee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the teacher cross eyed? Because he couldn''t control his pupils.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old McDonald had a farm... 2.71828 (-1) 2.71828 (-1) (5-5)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Manager gets caught stealing from his pizza job. Upper management says, they caught him stealing "dough".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of bee produces milk instead of honey? A boo bee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the muslim guy rig a competition? So he could win Allah the prizes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a doctor named Otto? An ottometrist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump''s greeting to all Mexicans on 14th February. Happy Wallentine''s Day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were the Vandals so fat? Gravity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck... Then the humans will suspect nothing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Snickers and a dick? Try Snickers sometimes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My father died from an overdose of Viagra recently. It''s been a hard time for us.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexican word of the day: Chicken My wife tried to come to America, but thanks to trump chicken not get in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you like duck sausage? Then duck on over here and get some.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the United States'' biggest, most well-known export? Troops', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought a vasectomy wouldn''t get my wife pregnant.. Turns out, all it does is just change the color of the baby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned sign language It''s very handy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does anyone else get as excited about Valentine''s Day coming up as they do about Christmas? Or is it just because I''m Jewish?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what''s really odd? Numbers that aren''t divisible by two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandpa said to me: "I don''t think these "Free (someone)" things are working..." "I mean I''ve seen millions of these "Free Wifi" -signs through the years, but as far as I know, the poor bastard hasn''t been freed yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the cleavage of a woman with fake breasts? Silicone Valley', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked an old man, "Even after 95 years, you still call your wife ''Darling'', ''Honey'', ''Love''. What''s the secret?" I asked an old man, "Even after 95 years, you still call your wife ''Darling'', ''Honey'', ''Love''. What''s the secret?" . OLD MAN: "I forgot her name 10 years ago and I''m scared to ask her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Hellen Keller drive? One hand on the steering wheel, the other on the road', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This administration is doing everything they can as quickly as possible So much so, even their scandals are Russian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the gay horse eat for brunch? Hay HAY Hay', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s one good thing about being a porn star. You''re always going to be satisfied with the job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some women love playing hard to get. Closing their blinds, locking their doors, calling the police...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate it when it heils outside... I always blame the Nazis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Girls Sleepover Amy: Truth or dare? Lingling: Truth. Amy: Where''s Sarah''s dog? Lingling: Dare. **lmao this is old asf and i am in no way racist, this just made me laugh**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My aunt Marge has been in hospital for a while. I can''t believe she''s not better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr and Mrs.. Mr and Mrs Sterile have no children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are women so clueless? They never bothered with the "Y".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man stands, chain smoking at a bus stop... A man stands, chain smoking at a bus stop. The woman standing next to him says "Hey, don''t you know that those things can kill you? I mean, didn''t you see the giant warning on the box?!" "That''s OK..." says the guy, puffing casually, "I''m a programmer" "So? What''s that got to do with anything?" "Errors are serious, warnings are nothing...".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it looks like a duck, and sounds like a duck... It probably identifies as a napkin and how dare you assume it''s species.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Californians hate walls so much... They cried until the Oroville dam collapsed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man drove his car into a tree. He found out how a Mercedes bends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Favorite sandwich So, I was talking to my friend the other day, and we ended up talking about our local deli. &nbsp; I asked him what his favorite sandwich was, and he told me it was the pastrami salami sandwich. &nbsp; Then I said "I don''t remember that one. What''s on it exactly?" &nbsp; He said "It''s the one with the synthetic pork and lard sausage." &nbsp; I said "No, you''re thinking of the phony bologna sandwich."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a place where the recycling rate is 98% /r/Jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to make a joke about chemistry tests But NaH', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pass the dam fish! A boy is selling fish on a corner. To get his customers'' attention, he is yelling, "Dam fish for sale! Get your dam fish here!" A pastor hears this and asks, "Why are you calling them "dam fish." The boy responds, "Because I caught these fish at the local dam." The pastor buys a couple fish, takes them home to his wife, and asks her to cook the dam fish. The wife responds surprised, "I didn''t know it was acceptable for a preacher to speak that way." He explains to her why they are dam fish. Later at the dinner table, he asks his son to pass the dam fish. He responds, "That''s the spirit, Dad! Now pass the fucking potatoes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did scorpion say to your ugly mum Stay oveerrr there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finding the perfect shower temperature on the first try is like my girlfriend Non existent, but I hope every day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dick has a sad life if you think about it His hair is a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbour is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy and to top it all off, his owner beats him regularly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the invisible man quit his new job? He just couldn''t see himself doing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when a Mexican provides hands-on internet services? Emanuel Labor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PSA: You should all donate money to testicular cancer research. It''s a no-ball cause. (But seriously you should)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a very busy businessman, but my wife still demanded that I take her out for valentine''s day... Vinnie, my hitman, said he''d do it for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shopping Cart racing Every time I see someone racing their shopping cart down the parking lot I secretly hope they run into a car. Wham!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jehovah''s witnesses are always banging on my door everyday Joke''s on them, I''m never letting them out of my basement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The choice for president came down to two candidates: the moody bitch or Hillary Clinton.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the troublesome teaspoon? It went into the kitchen and caused a stir.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was standing in line for hours showing my appreciation to everyone I met. It was a thanqueue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife what she wanted for Valentine''s Day, and she said "Something long and powerful that vibrates." I hope she likes her new weed eater!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s the father of corny jokes? Popcorn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Jewish men usually circumcised? Because Jewish women won''t take anything that''s less than 10% off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Trump''s favorite YouTuber? CrazyRussianHacker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mum calls me Scott, but my friends call me when they want something', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend is trying to convince me to replace all my skin with a plush brown material But I won''t be suede', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was doing CPR the other day And wow, that sure is a work out, it really....gets the blood moving', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never swallow scrabble tiles... That shit could spell disaster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of tea is hard to swallow sometimes? Re-ali', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What marker is only sold in shady areas? Mr. Sketch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman gets a new number She sends a text message to her husband. W - "Hi honey, this is my new number. Can''t wait to see you tonight" M - "Hey babe. I can''t tonight. I''m having dinner with my wife"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do pirates have babies? They Aaarrrrrrrrrrtificially Inseminate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was getting out of the shower As her husband was getting in; and she heard the door bell and quickly wrapped herself in a towel and went downstairs. She opened the door and it was their next door neighbor, Mike. He said, I''ll give you eight hundred dollars if you drop that towel right now. She thought, well that''s a lot of money, so she dropped the towel. He gave her the money and left. She went upstairs and told her husband that the neighbor Mike had come by. He asked if he gave her the eight hundred dollars he owed him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('it all The title says it all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During science class at school, I lowered the pressure and temperature in my lab flask, and introduced some tiny ice crystals to it. But my tutor stopped me and sent me home for trolling. How was I supposed to know it was bad to trigger snowflakes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever noticed that Ireland is just one sea away from.... Iceland', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said she wanted to feel special this Valentines Day. So I bought her a helmet and some crayons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It must be hard working as a prostitute. After all, work just comes and goes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For the valentines spirit Roses are red violets are blue I am pregnant but it is not from you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('roses are red, violets are blue in soviet russia, poems write you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('my friends carter and jack that''s it. that''s the joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dads Brilliant Business Plan Scene: A conversation with my friends father, who knows I do Web design. Father: I have a business idea. How hard is it to make a Facebook? Me: Oh, very easy. Friend: He doesnt mean to make a Facebook profile. He means to remake all of Facebook. Me: Oh. Very hard. Father: Oh, OK.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Anne Frank tie her shoes? In little Nazis!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently came into some money. You should have seen the look on the cashier''s face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister can''t stop having sex. I think she''s addickted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what I hate? People who answer their own questions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pathology lab was robbed last night. The stool samples were gone! The supervisor couldn''t believe it. He lost his shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you call a vegetarian spy? A Spynach', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentine day gift Husband : What do you want for Valentine Day ?? Wife : Give me One Ring, that''s enough .. Husband : From Landline or Mobile ??', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I went to pay for my items in a spiritualist shop I noticed a sign saying ''Queue on the other side''. So I killed myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What My Girlfriend Thought, First four Dates: 1. Nice shirt. 2. Wow. A second nice shirt. 3. OK, first shirt again. 4. He has two shirts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A: A quarter pounder with cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the pencil s bad influence on the paper ? His darkness rubbed off on him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Airhorn sound* *Second airhorn sound* Me: "Well this clearly isn''t deodorant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Celebrating birthdays is good Numerous studies say that people who celebrate more birthdays live for longer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bag of salt was crossing the road. Suddenly he tripped and fell, spilling his contents all over the road. Sensing no movement at all for quite some time, the road asked: "Do you need some help so you can get up, cross the road and finish this joke? What''s wrong?" The salt replies: "Freezing point depression."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best thing about John Cena jokes? You can''t see them coming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich guy dies and goes to the gates of heaven. He offers Peter gold, thinking he can buy his way in. Peter looks at it and says, "You brought me pavement?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I left my wife At the grocery store. I told her I would wait in the car. What I didn''t tell her was that I would move the car to the other end of the parking lot, and watch for her to come out. Something tells me that after 15 minutes of searching, she''ll feel the same way I did in the dairy section. Which butter is healthiest, she wondered, after reading the first 3 labels. She''s probably still reading them. I can''t wait to learn which one she''d chosen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Posting a joke on a Reddit is like going in a bar. Sometimes you get lucky, but most of the time you just lose your self esteem', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the frog cross the road? Some geeky kid in the 80''s forced it to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Many Times is This Shit Going to Get Reposted? Doesn''t matter you Reddit anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer was letting his 26 cows graze on a field near his farm with his dog when suddenly he sees a rain cloud approach. He doesn''t want his animals getting soaked or they might end up cold. He quickly scavenges for a bunch of branches and combines it with a tarp that he brought just for this occasion to build a make shift shelter. He whistles for his dog to herd them under the haphazard roof. He does a quick count and is shocked to find he suddenly has 30 cows. The next day he brings his wife along with his cows. Without even waiting for rain he builds a canvas roof and herds all his cows inside and again his 26 cows turn into 30. But his wife is less than impressed. "Don''t you think that''s amazing?!" he asks her. The Wife replies, "It''s just as expected, you rounded them up to the nearest tent."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Trump avoid discovery when all of the main means of communication were being traced? He used the alternative fax.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and eats pussy? Cervical cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d like to think that my girlfriend and I have a relationship that is above being forced to buy simple gifts as part of a made up holiday that exploits working class people through the commercialism of enormous corporations But I''d also like to get laid tomorrow night, so Walgreens after work it is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] What does the South side of Chicago hate about their police chief? His subject matter is poorly executed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cage the Elephant only won the Grammy out of pity... ...because they''re originally from Bowling Green, and everyone was sorry for the loved ones they lost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was jogging around the track at the gym and this really hot Latina chick passed me. I gave her a friendly wave and said "hola." However, she kept running and didn''t say anything to me. I shrugged and kept going, thinking that maybe she didn''t hear me. About 10 minutes later, she caught up to me again, and I once more waved and said "hola." Still, she kept her eyes straight ahead as she passed me and didn''t respond. At this point, I was a little offended and felt determined to at least get a response of some kind from her. Finally, about 10 minutes later she caught up to me again, and as she passed I said "hola" somewhat louder than before. She finally slowed down and turned back to me and said "A few times I''ve been around this track, so it''s not just gonna happen like that, ''cause I ain''t no hola back girl!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just dropped my phone in a load of mayo. What the hellman!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the smallest organ in a goat? An ISIS members'' dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Batman''s favorite drink? Nothing...just ice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 hookers How do you get 4 hookers on to one stool? Turn It upside down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at a party and I lost my watch I started looking throughout the house, and when I turn a corner there''s a guy standing on my timepiece, borderline groping and harassing a girl. So I go up and punch the guy, that''s not gonna happen. Not on my watch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('roses are red, violets are blue, pornhub is down; your facebook will do', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, Am I adopted ? I don''t know, ask your other dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Communism jokes aren''t funny Unless everyone gets them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('American Billionaire Grant Cardone is seeing a top psychiatrist. Apparently, he has a huge apartment complex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The worlds 4 most famous partially sighted musicians have got together. They''re starting a focus group.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of bees make milk? *boo*-bees', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I spend my valentines days like aging racist. Sad and alone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Humanity must have an Oedipus complex Because they all want to fuck mother nature.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking: Donald Trumps hair has been reported as missing Police are combing the area', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they have bar codes on the returning Swedish fleet? So they can Scandinavian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once got into so much debt I couldn''t even afford my electricity bills, they were the darkest times of my life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two eco terrorists humping a tree? A treesome!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back then, if I wanted to see her panties, I had to lift her skirt. Today, if I want to see her panties, I have to spread her butt cheeks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ELI5 why can you get dishonorably discharged from the Navy for boarding the wrong vessel just once? Whooops wrong sub!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had to break up with my cross-eyed girlfriend... Apparently, she was seeing someone else on the side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hope I leave this world the same way I came into it... Wrecking an 18-year-old''s pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It all The title says it all', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have this theory about the origin of orgies. It all started with a big bang!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the different between batman and a black man? Batman can go out without robin ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks the Priest... "Why do you use a Samsung phone?" "To remind me that the apple was the first sin." "So you are an atheist?" "Of course not! Why do you think that?" "Because I have notes on why Samsung''s phones always end with a big bang!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally watched Girl on the Train. I guess you could say there''s a real twist at the end...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The alien vessel landed quietly on St Peter''s square in Rome... A hatch opened and two little grey men with dazzling smiles appeared. They were promptly granted an audience with the Pope. After a brief discussion about the weather, the Pope said, "I know this question may sound odd to you, but I was wondering if you and your kind knew about Jesus Christ?" "Jesus Christ?!" exclaimed the slightly taller of two aliens. "Of course we do! He visits our planet every two years or so. Awesome fellow!" A hush descended on the audience chamber, and everyone watched the Pope, whose face had turned a rather odd purple. "Every two years?" he shouted. "We''re still waiting for his second coming!" "Maybe he didn''t like your chocolate?" suggested the alien. "Chocolate?" replied the Pope. "What in heaven''s name does chocolate have to do with it?" "Well," said the alien. "When he came to our planet, we gave him chocolate. Why, what did you do?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Lady visited a bar for the first time.. She was nervous but sat on one tall stool in front of the bartender.. the guy sitting on her left said: "Jack Daniels, Single" the Guy on her right side ordered: "Johnny Walker, Single" now the bartender looked at the lady & said, "And You?" Lady replied: "Yolanda, Married"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a venereal disease from a girl in a wheelchair Now I''m handiclapped', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a gang member''s favorite skateboarding trick? A cripflip', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This girl kept saying how Brits drank too much tea and how she hated it. But she didn''t seem too happy when I took her tea shirt off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate people who always sit on the fence with two opinions. Having said that, I love them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s wrong with that 5 year old Ethiopian? He''s having a mid-life crisis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What currency do they use in outer space? Starbucks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Amazon Drones I read an article about drones recently. A software development firm was testing drones in the Amazon basin and developing mapping software when they began receiving strange anomalies in the data. The drones were covering more area than they had modeled in the software. They couldn''t figure out why the drones were exceeding the units per second figures of their graphs. That''s when I realized: Amazon drones are always faster than U(nit)P(er)S(econd) estimations.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just removed my sister''s bra. She said, "Stop wearing my bra''s."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentine''s Day is around the corner and I don''t know what to get my partner... I mean, what do you get for your left hand?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you milk sheep? With iPhone accessories.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the Scarecrow, win the award? He was out standing in his field', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy who gets lots of blowjobs? Successful', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bumped into Liam Gallagher in Manchester the other day and he told me this joke. "What do Blur and Iranians have in common?" They''re both shiite', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t William Shakespeare go to the pub? Because he was bard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The most attractive thing about your mom... Is her gravitational pull', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An atheist, a vegan and a CrossFitter walk into a bar I only know because they told everyone within two minutes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So the bartender says "I''m sorry, but we don''t serve time travelers here" A time traveler walk into a bar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red Raindrops are dank My father died. How?, my repulsive ass stank (not funny, but a valentines day related joke)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father is on his deathbed. His 4 children are there, 3 tall with red hair, 1 short with black hair, as well as his wife. "Before I die, tell me,is that my child?"He asks his wife, pointing to the shortest. "I swear on everything that''s your kid."The wife replies. Relieved the father then passes away. Shortly after he passes, his wife mutters "Thank god he didn''t ask about the other three." Edit: makes more sense, also some spacing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an octopus with an electric eel? A shocktopus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boss wanted fire one of his coworkers Boss: "I''m sorry but you are fired" Coworker: "why? I didn''t do anything?" Boss: "Bingo"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother takes her three sons to enroll in school. The teacher asks. A mother takes her three sons to enroll in school. The teacher asks. Teacher: What are your sons names? Lady: This boys name is Leroy, this other boys name is Leroy, and Leroy here is my third sons name. Teacher: Isnt it confusing having all three boys named the same? Lady: Oh no, you see when its time for lunch I just holler out the door, Leroy! its time for lunch, and they all come a runnin. When its time for dinner I just holler out the door, Leroy! its time for dinner and they all come a runnin. Teacher: Ok, so what do you do when you want a specific boy? Lady: Oh, well then I just holler out their last name.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Has anyone found a date for Valentine''s? I did! It''s on 14th Feb! Laugh please I''m pathetic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the Ancient Greeks seperate the men from the boys? With a crowbar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Me. Me who? I didn''t know you had a cat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman cried and slammed the door of the restroom . . . seeing how she grimaced, the janitor asked if there was someone in the toilet, to which the woman responded "Almost!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can never understand organic chemistry. It has alkynes of problems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wasn''t originally going to get a brain transplant. But then I changed my mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do trees do when they get mad at each other? Throw shade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I''ve never had a garbanzo bean on my face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the kid-napping at the school? Well, he''s fine. He''s awake now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been told I''m a "real catch" by the ladies. *Lady doctors. Apparently I have all sorts of viruses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: "Dad, Am I adopted"? Dad: "Not yet. We still haven''t found anyone who wants you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks on a street and sees an open manhole He cries into it: "Fuck you bitch!" Then echo replies: "Bitch you fuck!" A bit puzzled, he cries again: "Bitch you fuck!" And a second later, he hears: "Fuck you bitch!" Even more puzzled, he cries inside: "Fuck you bitch bitch you fuck!" The manhole replies: "Fuck off dude, I''m trying to work here"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a seagull I saw a huge seagull this morning. It was big enough to be a D gull... But not quite big enough to be an eagle. One thing''s for sure, it definitely wasn''t a beagle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a river so rich? Because it has two banks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a fire breaks out at a swingers convention It causes premature evacuation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a handkerchief dance? Put a little boogie in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you deal with a bunch of clowns? You go for the juggler.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do we want? A cure for tourrettes. When do we want it? FUCKING SHIT CUNT!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump loves chewing 5 Gum He wants to Stimulate his Pences.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow running through tall grass? Udderly Tickled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What I find most sexy in a girl is her personality Girl: Oh good, cus I have several of those! Guy: Uh... what? Girl: _Shh!_ don''t _listen_ to _her!_', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do black men do after sex? 15 years to life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What if Cee-Lo Green wrote a poem? I see you drivin'' ''Round town with the girl I love And I''m like haiku', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For my wife''s birthday, I got a guy to follow her all day making bee noises. She really wanted a hummer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my doctor suspects sexual transmission Doctor: it could be a sexually tran... Me: not unless I got it from a toilet seat Me:(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Will glass coffins be a success? Remains to be seen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking news: An entire shipment of Viagra has been stolen The polices are looking for a gang of hardened criminals', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This 70 year old guy walks in to his favorite bar with his new 25 year old bride Everyone is totally amazed at the sight, then one of his buddy''s asked how did you get this young thing to marry you. .. ........Told her I was 80...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A German chemistry student holds up a small vial of HCn. The professor asks him if he''s done with the lab. He says, "Yes, professor, this is my final solution."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the longest and hardest thing for a black man? 3rd grade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are ghosts impotent? Because they have a hollow-weenie sorry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My roomate scared me as I was leaving the bathroom I guess I got scared shitless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve decided that I like the alt-right It feels good to jerk my dick with my left hand from time to time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The real reason it floods after the levee breaks? Nobody gives a dam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adele requested and got a reset/restart on her song at the Grammy because she messed up The Atlanta Falcons would also like to replay the 4th Quarter of the Superbowl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Got my rabbits balls chopped off Friend: So how''d they taste?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The reason why Bill Gates is paying for Donald Trump''s wall He knows no Juan in Mexico can foot the bill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow with no legs... Ground beef.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Math] Hey girl, want to come over and integrate? Unfortunately, After every time we +e^x I am left with an e^x', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love sleeping so much! \* Opens my eyes \* Doctor: You were in Coma for four years. Me: Just five more minutes please. \* Goes back to sleep \*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a Freudian slip with my wife tonight. I meant to ask her to "feed the dogs." Instead I said, "You ruined my life, you soul sucking, evil beast."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... And a chair, and a table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: Samsung has agreed to work with Bill Gates on Trump''s wall On the condition to recycle Samsung Galaxy Note 7', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex with three people is called a threesome. Sex with two people is called a twosome. That is why they call me handsome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A naked lady walks into a bar with a parrot on her shoulder. The bartender says That''s a nice pig you got there. The woman says it''s not a pig it''s a parrot. The bartender says I was talking to the parrot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you circumcise a whale? 4 skin divers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My das was telling me why he quit drinking. He was talking to his grandfather and they were both huge hunters. A conversation arose about ticks, and how they would always affect the game they caught, how they were "fuckin'' blood sacs of the devil". A light turns on and my dad turns around abruptly and sees his mother standing there in a white gown. "Who and what the fuck are you talking about"? "Geandfather! Talkin'' about ticks! Tick talk!" My grandmother shakes her head and with a blank expression says "Carl that a fucking clock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidently lost some chromosomes today Now I''m feeling rather down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love is an open~ Relationship', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the man who went to get circumcised say? Just a little off the top', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought shoes from a drug dealer... I don''t know what he laced them with but I''ve been tripping all day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I hear one more pun about whale food... I''m gonna krill myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s the first Jewish guy to ever win a Heisman trophy? "Fred Goldman cause he took mine!" - OJ Simpson', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t bald people use keys? Because they don''t have any locks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think Trump''s wife just goes to show... Immigrants do the jobs average Americans won''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally butt dialed my proctologist once... I told him it was an accident... he said I was full of shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The hardest part about having sex with a tranny is not coming. Because once you come, you regret.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Know why you can''t hear a pterodactyl use the bathroom? The P is silent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call to Donald Trump''s business card? A trump card', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call gambling currency that can''t melt steel beams? Bet fuel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to Ed Sheeran''s girlfriend? She ran.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that animals make a different sounds depending what part of the world you are in....? For example, in China, Dogs makes a sizzling sound! *I know I am going to hell for this but this was an old joke that was told to me. *', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black guy with a parrot on his shoulder walks into a bar The bartender asks: Hey cool, where''d you get it? The parrot says: Africa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do ghosts have trouble meeting girls at bars? Because they''re only there for the boos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Obese people are a very large portion of the population. ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Superman put in his drink? Just ice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst name for a history lesson? A crash course on 9/11', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic and a dyslexic? Someone who lays awake at night wondering if there really is a dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the squiggly line say to the angle? Your acute. (Squiggly line because gay because squiggly line =/= straight)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did trump say to Chinese president in a phone call? "I will bomb Hiroshima Again"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: As if it isnt broken fucking enough', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Need a joke for valentines card Valentines is tomorrow and i just wondering anyone could tell me a jokes so i can write on it to my gf Thank you!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad won the lottery after having a stroke Guess it was a stroke of luck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For Sale: French WWII Rifle Never fired. Only dropped once.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Trump supporter is glad the election is finally over & can go back to watching his favorite show on MSNBC... he can now keep up with how his cousin, brother, & wife are doing while watching Lockup: Wichita.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Damn girl, are you Muslim? ''cause that ass is bomb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I painted my computer black so that it would run faster, but now it doesn''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it''s yellow, let it mellow If it''s brown, stop it at the border and submit it to extreme vetting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quiet guy in class had this gem of a response Military history class. We have this one guy in class who doesn''t really say much and tends to keep to himself; just figured one of those ''man of few words'' kinda guys. One day, we were discussing the planes used in WW2. Ensuing discussion goes as such Professor: So what planes did we have during that time? Student 1: Well we had the Cobra and Mustang Professor: Ok and what did the Japanese have? Student 2: Japanese had zeros Professor: And what was the main difference between us and them? Quiet kid: We didn''t crash as much The professor tried to keep it together but started rolling, dropped his marker, and said ''Class dismissed''. We had 20 minutes left. Thanks quiet kid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the movie in which a young fat lady gets kidnapped? Its called "Beauty and the feast"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three Nuns Die In a car crash and go to heaven, Sister Margeret, Sister Patricia, and Sister Mary. They meet Peter at the gates of heaven. Peter : " Before any of you get in, you need to wash the part of your body in the fountain of holy water that has been lustfully used to sin" Sister Margeret walks to the fountain and washes her hands. Peter : " Thankyou Sister Margeret you may walk through", Sister Patricia, your next. As Sister Patricia walks up, Sister Mary quickly runs and pushes her out of the way and gets to the fountain first. Peter : "Wait your turn!!!!, you cannot push in like that!!. Sister Mary: " Please!!! , Please!!!, let me wash out my mouth before Sister Patricia puts her ass in it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one muffin say to the other? ''Whew! It''s hot in this oven!'' How did the other muffin reply? ''Holy shit! A talking muffin!'' Go easy on me, it''s my first post to reddit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say people who stammer aren''t idiots But I''m not so sure about that, considering the only word longer than four syllables they know is "T-t-t-t...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A British guy, a Frenchman and a Russian were in a bar debating whether Adam and Eve were British, French, or Russian. The British guy says, " Obviously they were both British, observe how Adam offered Eve some of his apple after he received it from her, true British manners". French guy says: "Non, non, monsieur they were both French. First of all they were both NAKED, and Eve was so feminine and seductive and drove Adam nuts". Russian guy says: "Both of you are wrong. I can prove conclusively that Adam and Eve were nothing but Russian. They had no clothes. They had no heat. All that was left to eat was one lousy apple and they called it paradise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, an Irishman and an American Get drunk in a bar on the top floor of a skyscraper. The American says: "There''s an updraft on the 7th floor that allows you to jump out this window and land on the 4th floor." "Bullshit" says the Irish. So the American jumps from the top floor and sure enough; just as he goes past the 7th floor, he slows down and lands on the 4th. "Fucking fun!" says the Irish guy as he jumps. And falls to his death. "You''re a right cunt when your drunk Superman!" says the Englishman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you give a vampire a concussion? Hit it with a bat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redneck murders are hard to solve. Never any dental records and all the DNA''s the same.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My alarm clock decided to leave me tomorrow. It would''ve left yesterday, but it''s taking its time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Spanish guy rob a train? He had a *loco*-motive', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? About 50 pounds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Luke cage In marvels luke cage everyone thinks that luke has super powers because he''s bullet proof. But bullet proof black people isn''t a super power it''s straight up evolution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My toilet left me today Guess it couldn''t take my crap anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just realized how gay my clothes are. They come out of the closet every morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of deodorant do dwarves use? They don''t like to choose but when they do they pickaxe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone stole my Microsoft Office, and they''re going to pay. You have my Word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The final solution to manspreading. So my Jewish friend informed me that his mom was low key, unimpressed with his "manspreading". I feel bad; the rabbi could avoid all of this by cutting off just a bit more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey Sue, wouldn''t it be lovely to take a nice walk today? "That would be lovely!" Great! Will you bring back some crisps and beer?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have the most boring job of all... I run an oil drill rig.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She was a whisky maker.. ..but I loved her still.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black man standing on a street corner? A crack dealer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Imperial Wizard of the KKK was just found dead near a river in Missouri... Man, the moment the EPA gets threatened people start dropping white trash in our water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t Sean Spicer wear a sign that says everything that comes out of his mouth is BS? Because that would be redundant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Condoms don''t guarantee safe sex anymore.... My friend was wearing one and got shot by the woman''s husband.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Gates and Steve Jobs Talk At A Bar After a Long Day of Gettin'' Money Bill: So I went to the bank yesterday to talk about a loan Steve: What do you need a loan for? Bill: Oh, I don''t. The bank does.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m sorry that I sent you Donald Trump Reddit replies: Username checks out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Michael Jackson and an Xbox? One is turned off by children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do u get when an alien barges into your bathroom while you''re taking a shower? An invasion of privacy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a box of chocolates I don''t like chocolate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the problem with lawyer jokes? Lawyers don''t think they''re funny, and other people don''t think they''re jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb? Apparently not three because my basement is still dark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, what does a fire sit on? It''s Ash', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In some situations in life, I find that you just need a little push. I might be a door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a piano player with no arms or legs? Clever dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Chewbacca''s Chinese cousin? A Fortune Wookie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] If sleeping with an Asian gets you your yellow belt, what do you get when you sleep with a Muslim? A suicide belt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between tired and exhausted? When you run in front of a car, you get tired. When you run behind a car, you get exhausted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adele didn''t originally want to perform at the Grammy''s but they bugged the crap out of her till she said yes. They must''ve called a thousand times.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A death row inmate asks as his last request to talk to Donald Trump. Because he has nothing better to do, Trump agrees and meets with the man the day before his execution. Trump: "So, uh, what did you do?" Inmate: "I shot a bunch of people in a liquor store robbery, burned down a hospital and stole all their drugs, molested farm animals, blew up an orphanage, set homeless people on fire for fun, and sold my mother into sexual slavery in Thailand." Trump: "Wow. And why''d you wanna see me?" Inmate: "Because despite all the horrible things I''ve done, I can take my last comfort in being reminded of one fact - at least I''m not you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Caught my penis cheating on my wife today. Luckily after a few beatings, it learned it''s lesson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you are deaf and you have Parkinson''s... ...is that like having a stutter?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how they say "a woman''s work is never done"? Maybe that is why they get paid less.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ordered 4 drinks at McDonald''s..... ....so they wouldn''t think all 50 chicken nuggets were for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Italian Army tanks have five gears Four reverse, one forward (in case they get attacked from the rear)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a dog played soccer, who would the dog play for? BARKELONA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Grandfather told me my generation is to reliant on technology. I told him, "no Grandpa, yours does." Then I unplugged his life support.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do electrical engineers use to clean up their equations? A handkirchoff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It must suck to have your period on valentines day But an even bigger pain in the ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now that Russia decriminalized spousal beatings.. Men are finally Putin(g) women in their place', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Jim Carrey and Bane have in common? No one cared who they were ''til they put on the mask.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just put my hair in a bun. It wasn''t very nice, I think I''ll try it with a croissant next time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My favourite sport starts with a "T". It''s golf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of hunters from Wyoming are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesnt seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: My friend is dead! What can I do? The operator, in a calm soothing voice, says: Just take it easy. I can help. First, lets make sure hes dead. There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guys voice comes back on the line. He says: OK, now what?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbours named their child "Saturn". That''s not something I''d call my child, but it has got a ring to it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love dead baby jokes Because they never get old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife where she wanted to go for dinner. She said, "Somewhere that has fish." So I pushed her in the river.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Trump think the food stamps program is unnecessary? Because he''s constantly providing us with low hanging fruit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend and I were moving each others comic book collection and now we both have to see a chiropractor. Because we both have back issues.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my wife I''m her trophy husband... Too bad it''s just a participation trophy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('China built a wall... That''s why you don''t see any Mexican in China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk blonde woman was sitting at a bar says to the barman, A drunk blonde woman was sitting at a bar says to the barman, "Barfender, I''d like a marhini for my heartburn." The barman mixes her drink and puts in down in front of her. A few minutes later, she calls him over and says, "Barfender, I''d like a marhini for my heartburn." He rolls his eyes but mixes her drink anyway and sets it down in front of her. A few minutes later, she waves him over again and says, "Barfender, I''d like a marhini for my heartburn." The barman looks her up and down and says, "First off, it''s bartender, not barfender. Second off, it''s martini, not marhini. And third, you don''t have heartburn, your boob is in the ashtray."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Cheesy Joke My family spent all of today calling me by different cheese names. I told them I just wanted to be left provolone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only When you perfect the art of fishing and baiting hooks.. Will you become a Master Baiter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a primate that works out? A Gym-panzee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is there a reason you ate that entire fish sandwich? To be honest, I did it for the halibut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Schools should have a class designed for introverts... *anti-social studies*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer in the USSR comes out of the chambers laughing his head off. A colleague approaches him and asks why he is laughing. "I just heard the funniest joke in the world!" "Well, go ahead, tell me!" says the other judge. "I can''t I just gave someone ten years for it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what is blue and has 27 tits? the trashbag at a cancer clinic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just made life a whole lot simpler for an overweight friend of mine... I explained to him that every restaurant in town is an "all you can eat" place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the internet say to it''s history? "Cache me outside, how ''bout dat?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American man goes on a business trip to Japan. And he arrives there a day early before the meeting. So he decides to enjoy the night-life a little bit. The man goes out to a bar, picks up a lady after having a few drinks, and takes her back to the hotel. Eventually they start having sex and the lady keeps saying, "Oshi Moshi! Oshi Moshi!" The man thought that was weird but he kept going. The next day, he meets some business men on a golf course and sees one of them shank the ball. The guy is absolutely livid and shouts, "Oshi Moshi!" The American man looks at him and asks, "I hate to bother you, but what does ''oshi moshi'' mean?" The golfer replies, "wrong hole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a ginger Mormon? An orang Utahn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the princess marry the barbarian? Because she thought he was brutiful', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Coding Jokes post coding jokes I will <br> your heart', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not fair to compare Trump to Hitler. Hitler appreciated the arts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the most outstanding thing about our illegal immigrants? Their warrants. (Here come the down-votes!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who are the most decent people at a hospital? The ultra sound people', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Harry Potter and the Jews? Harry Potter rode the train back. I''m not apologizing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In which mountain range do fruit trees primarily grow? The Apple-achian mountains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to smoke weed in the 90''s Now I don''t care what temperature it is', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So an Irish man walks out of a pub. What? It could happen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Mary say when she saw Jesus with a massive erection? He has risen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the potato the Russians put into space? They called it Spudnik', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to like going skiing. But that hobby... Went downhill so fast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The government in this town is excellent, and uses your tax dollars efficiently.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate milking cows, every time I do it... It makes me shUDDER.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a wine enthusiast, I am appalled by Trump''s recent executive orders. What right does he have to ban sommeliers from entering this country?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking past a construction site and the guy hammering on the roof called me a paranoid little weirdo... ...in morse code. [Credit goes to Emo Phillips]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a squirrel swim on it''s back? To keep his nuts dry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the drunk guy who got suplexed? He was waisted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How big was the iceberg that sank the Titanic? Cap size', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Uriel Uriel goes to Michael. "I am going to become a muse. Here''s my flaming sword." "What will you use instead?" "My pen, idiot!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some crocodiles can grow 17-20 ft But most have 4', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lost my job today... Told my boss I was always late cause I had diarrhea .. he told me I was full of shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kellyanne Conway gets caught cheating. "How could you? I''ve loved and trusted you and this is how you treat me?" "What about Hillary Clinton''s Emails?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was inquiring about seating for two at a new restaurant and they asked if I had reservations... I said that I had some, but that I was willing to give it a try.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I remember when Squeeze Theorem used to be called The Sandwich Theorem. Damn Political Correctness', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What can you make with epileptic lettuce? A seizure salad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re ever attack by a group of clowns.... Make sure to go for the juggler.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Law and Order In the criminal justice system, sexually-based offenses are considered especially anus. In New York City, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Special Booty Unit. These are their stories.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Germany almost go bankrupt? Because the Holo-cost a lot of money. Anne Frankly, it wasn''t worth it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy Joel walks into a bar. The barman says Bill, I believe this is killing me. As the smile ran away from his face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to be in a horse back riding club... But I got kicked out for horsing around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the egg say when it turned up? Om lit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most OUTSTANDING thing about our illegal immigrants? Their warrents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone just asked me if I''d take a bullet for the last person I had sex with Sure, she''s a bitch, but of course I''d take a bullet for my cousin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to be a car racer... But I didn''t have the drive for it and I drifted away from that career.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The reason for the wage gap is that men have high paying jobs like doctor, lawyer, etc. while women usually have lower paying jobs... ...like female doctor, female lawyer, etc.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the yeast say to the flour? Do you want to make some dough, Sugar?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the easiest way to tell if somebody is vegan? Oh, don''t worry. They''ll tell you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hellen Keller walks into a bar... Then a stool. Then a table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snowboarding seems like the gayest sport. Is involves lubricant for the equipment, you''re quite often on your knees and at the end of the day your butt hurts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A joke for St. Patricks Day What is long, green, and has an asshole every 3 feet? A St. Patricks Day Parade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 Danish guys just tried stealing the toilet paper from my Air BnB bringing shame upon their entire country! Worst viking raid ever!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was telling my dad That the entire team that worked on finding Nemo had to take fish biology 101. Then he says "so does it ever bother you that the fish are talking?" That was the hardest I laughed in a while', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Making love while camping is the best It''s fucking in tents', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My bakery was recently robbed. Now, I''ve seen a lot of robberies before... But this takes the cake!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the snowman no good at big games? He got cold feet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many testicles does an Oak have? Tree', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only mistake I ever made... Was buying a pencil with an eraser on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never forget the pickle on your burgers It''s kind of a big dill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy thats half Mexican and half Chinese that wears only one sneaker? Juan Chu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between male and female? Fe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a mexican use to cut his pizza? Little Caesars', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: Bill Gates has agreed to pay for Trump''s wall On the condition he gets to install windows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man approached the very beautiful..... The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, You know, Ive lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes? Why? Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Son got sent home from school for the third time this year for letting a girl wank him off in class... ...I told him "maybe teaching isn''t for you.."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Hispanic carpenter is feeling depressed After living a life of always reading other people''s directions and instructions to do his job, he decides he wants to to make his *own* decision for once: Committing suicide. So he scribbles down some words on a piece of paper and reviews what he wrote, nodding in approval. He hops into his car in his garage and tapes a garden hose to the exhaust pipe. He starts his car and puts the hose in his mouth, inhaling deeply, anticipating the sweet release of death. Soon after, he succumbs to his poison of choice and falls down, dying slowly as if he was simply falling asleep. His wife comes home and discovers him. Horrified, she sees a piece of paper next to him and picks it up, thinking it will be a suicide note to give her some clarity on what made him choose this terrible act. In familiar handwriting, she sees scribbled on the page: **INSTRUCTIONS** Step 1: Connect Jos to hose B', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs? Cash and carry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would tell you to listen to my favorite Kendrick Lamar song... But it''s just alright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man walks into a bar looking sad..... One night a man walks into a bar looking sad. The bartender asks the man what he wants. The man says Oh just a beer. The bartender asked the man Whats wrong, why are you so down today?. The man said My wife and i got into a fight, and she said she wouldnt talk to me for a month. The bartender said So whats wrong with that? The man said Well the month is up tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Genius, an Old Farmer, and a Boy Scout are on a plane... ...The pilot enters the cabin and says, "I''m terribly sorry. I''ve done everything I can, but the plane is falling and going to crash. Now, there are only 3 parachutes on this plane. I''ve got a wife at home with 2 young kids and another on the way, so I''m going to use one of them." He then picks up a parachute, puts it on, and jumps out of the plane. The Genius says, "I am the smartest person in the world. My death would be a huge loss because of my immense knowledge. I simply must survive this crash." He follows after the pilot. The Old Farmer looks at the Boy Scout and says, "Well, son, I''ve lived a long, fulfilling life. You have your whole future ahead of you. You take the last parachute." The Boy Scout replies, "Don''t worry sir, we''ll both survive. The Genius took my backpack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It doesn''t matter, because feminists can''t change anything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old lady was talking to her husband on Valentine''s day evening.... "Dear, honestly answer this. What did you think when you saw me the first time 50 years ago?" He says "I thought I so want to suck your titties dry and fuck your brains out..." Wife giggles hearing this answer. While biting her lips she says "Well... what do you think of me now?" He says without skipping a beat " I think I did a fairly good job!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lovely woman is first in line at a bus stop. The bus opens its doors to let her on. She lifts her leg for the step and funds she cannot reach it. She realizes it must be her tight dress and reaches back and unzips it a little bit. Again, she brings her leg up and still cannot reach the first step of the bus. A little more embarrassed, she reaches back again and unzips her dress a good deal more. But again, her foot falls just short of the step. Finally she reaches back and unzips the dress almost all the way. At this point the young man behind her reaches forward, grabs her by the hips and lifts her to the step. Infuriated, she turns and nearly screams, "And what made you think you had permission to touch me like that!?" The man calmly replies, "Well, after you reaches back and unzipped my fly three times I kinda figured we were friends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Whatever it is it''s heading straight for the world trade center.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the people that became octophobes after going to the buffet? They eight too much!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t understand how people of color can be discriminated against Aren''t we all hue, man?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend said I need to moisturize I told her I moist my eyes every day when I think of what Europe has become.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do when a epileptic''s having a fit in the bath? Throw your washing in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be addicted to the hokey pokie But then I turned myself around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Italians are fighting Americans in the trenches An American gets the idea to yell the name Luigi, and being a common Italian name when someone hears their name and looks up, they shoot him. "Hey, Luigi!" An Italian looks up and says "Yeah?" BANG After the Americans do this a few times, the Italians try it for themselves. They decide to yell the name John, being a common American name. "Hey-a, John!" An American shouts back "Hey! Is that you Luigi?" The Italian looks up "Yeah, itsa me!" BANG', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black man, a mexican man and an asian walk into a bar... and they are all accepted and welcomed. Now isn''t that refreshing?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call pasta made by a jamaican sex pest? Harrastapasta', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My in-laws couldn''t cope when their cat had 9 kittens, so my wife told me to put them in a sack and dump them in the river. I did it, but it broke my heart. I quite liked her dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baby are you an ether? Coz you get my pp up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that if a girl has a lot of sex with guy she''s a slut... But if a guy does it he''s gay?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A failed tv presenter, a disgraced newspaper editor and a phone hacker walk into a bar.... ..and the barman says "What''ll it be, Piers?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are arguing over what to watch... The first man wants to watch horse racing. The second man wants to watch women''s tennis. The third man wants to watch a childbirth video. As they each try to grapple for the remote, the channels continue to change. This is what their neighbours heard: And they''re off! Uhhh-Uhhh And a baby is born!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the gay Irishmen? Phillip Dune and James Mcavity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the clothes store where all women''s pants were half-off. But all the women there were fully dressed. Fucking liars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by vomiting on a cute co-worker I told her, "Next time, lunch is on me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People are like trashcans When you step on their feet, their mouth opens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I come from a town where you have to keep a whale on you at all times. If you don''t, they issue you a cetacean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey Hitler, where are the showers? >They are down the hall, on the third reich.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The oven and the woman are just alike Because you have to get them both hot before you stick the meat in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to fix the wage gap. Wagegap', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Doc say to Scotty? Great Scott.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doorbell rang so the son went to open the door. - How is it? - I''m the house owner, I''m here to collect rent. - Mom! It''s the owner. Do you have money or should I go play outside again?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you never buy a twin a basket of fruit? Because they come in pairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke about the Earth''s rotation Just made my day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cabinet members does it take to screw in a light bulb? All of them but they still can''t do it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear what NASA''s new slogan will be once their budget is cut? "NASA: The Sky''s The Limit"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Early in the morning, the father knocks at his son''s door and yells, "Wake up, son! Time to go to school." Sleepy, the son mumbles to his dad, "Listen, Pops... I''m not going to school today for three basic reasons: first of all because I''m dead tired, second because I hate that school and third because I''ve had it with those punks!" To which the father answers from outside the door, "Well, you''re going for three reasons: first of all because you have a duty to perform, second because you''re 45 and third because you''re the school principal!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If space aliens landed in the U.S. today they would say Take us to your leader', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m 35 and I''ve never been in a serious relationship. My wife wouldn''t like to hear that, though.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, what''s difference between Trump and Goatse.cx? I can''t tell cause they''re both YUUUUGE assholes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog that pees on the mat? Ono-mat-o-poeia', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what is it called when your crush has a crush on you too? Imagination.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Today''s topic is DEMOCRACY Teacher: What is Democracy? Students: Today''s topic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked into a bar It really hurt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t believe you blew your co-worker! Girlfriend: I didn''t, I swear Me: Oh come on, cough it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what''s the difference between neil armstrong and michael jackson? neil armstrong walked on the moon and michael jackson fucked little kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''''Your eyes sparkle like diamonds'''' So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says ''''Your eyes sparkle like diamonds''''. I said, ''''Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck''''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate flying back from China It''s really disorienting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Jews get circumcised? 1. Because Jewish women won''t touch anything that isn''t at least 10% off. 2. Because they never leave a tip. 3. Because there''s no end to those pricks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend was standing and looking in the bedroom mirror ... She wasn''t happy with what she saw, and said to me, "I feel horrible. I look fat and ugly. Could you give me a compliment?" I looked over at her and said, "Well, your eyesight is perfect."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honey, I think I''m ugly.... So I pulled her infront of a mirror, stood right next to her and said: "Darling, I mean look a that sexy smile, that beautiful hair and those eyes....Just wow. No wonder you feel ugly next to me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who the fuck does Bernie Sanders think he is? Not MY president!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of scientists run an experiment on a frog They teach it to jump on command by using flies as treats. Now when they say "Jump" the frog jumps. Then they chop off one leg. They say "Jump" and the frog jumps in a crooked path. So far so good. Finally, they chop off the other leg. They say "Jump" and the frog does not jump. It has been concluded that frogs cannot hear without their legs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which Netflix show best sums up America today? Orange Is the New Black.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She didn''t realize tapping him on the shoulder would make him do this. A lady in a taxi leaned forward to ask the driver a question. She gently tapped his shoulder to get his attention. The driver screamed, lost control of the cab and nearly hit a bus. He drove over the curb, almost going through a shop window. For a few moments the inside of the cab was silent. The shaken driver turned and said, "Are you ok? I''m very sorry, but you scared the piss out of me!" The passenger, very startled at this point, apologizes to the driver and says "I didn''t realize a mere tap on the shoulder could scare some one so bad" The driver replied "no, no, I''m the one who is sorry, today is my first day driving a cab. I''ve been driving a hearse for over 20 years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What direction did the pirate go to get his bread?? Yeast!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John robbed some coffee from Starbucks the other day. The police are charging him for mugging.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I lost 10kg last week I can''t seem find that dumbbell anywhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell if a blond has been working at your computer? There''s white out all over the screen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t wait for the 14th It will be the 68th anniversary of the Bank of England opening', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When did the nerd get out of bed? 13:37', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a Beer Festival in London, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer. Corona''s president sits down and says, "Seor, I would like the world''s best beer, a Corona." The bartender takes a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him. Then Budweiser''s president says, "I''d like the best beer in the world, give me ''The King Of Beers'', a Budweiser." The bartender gives him one. Coors'' president says, "I''d like the best beer in the world, the only one made with Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors." He gets it. The guy from Guinness sits down and says, "Give me a Coke." The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask, "Why aren''t you drinking a Guinness?" The Guinness president replies, "Well, if you guys aren''t drinking beer, neither will I."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Helen Keller have yellow legs? Her dog was blind too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do women have trouble parking? Guys always give them the wrong idea of what six inches is!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So everyone is appreciating Newton for inventing gravity... ...well, I don''t. We could''ve all been flying now if it wasn''t for that goddamn apple.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I get home from work, my wife lets me put my feet up... When we first met, I stuggled to get two fingers up...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a good joke and A bad joke timing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor said I had 10 hours to live So I killed him and the judge gave me 30 years!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your girlfriend starts smoking Slow down and start using a lubricant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the two gay Irishmen? William Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzwilliam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Policeman stops a tandem. Excuse me sir. I think you''ve lost your wife back down the road. Thank god for that. I thought I''d gone deaf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the hipster burn his lips? He ate his pizza before it was cool', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have Picturegraphic memory. Is that the word; picturegraphic? Can''t remember long words.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what if I don''t know what ''few'' means? It doesn''t mean a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t Alabama have calculus teachers. They don''t like integration.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t cheese want to be sliced? It had grater plans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My lesbian friend is very ill& It seems she''s lacking vitamin D.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my girlfriend I''d buy her a wedding ring if she gave me a blowjob. She''s a sucker for love.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bought Animal Skin Jackets at 60% off. It was a great *offur.*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish people would stop acting like Chuck Norris is a god If he really is so good why doesn''t he teleport behind me and slam my head into the keyboard then hhjfdjusodbfhzoakcblkqoscsnjqpqkc', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rabbi and the bicycle A visibly upset man goes to see his rabbi one day and says: "Rabbi, you won''t believe what happened to me! Last week, someone stole my bicycle from the synagogue!" The rabbi is deeply upset by this, but after thinking for a moment, he offers a solution: "Next week come to services, sit in the front row, and when we recite the Ten Commandments, turn around and look at the people behing you. And when we got to ''Thou shalt not steal,'' see who can''t look you in the eyes and that''s your guy." The rabbi is very pleased with his suggestion, and so is the man. And next service, the rabbi is very curious to learn whether his advice worked. He waits for the man by the doors of the synagogue, and asks him "So dit it work? " "Like a charm," the man answers. "The moment we got to ''Thou shalt not commit adultery,'' I remembered where I left my bicycle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dentist: This will hurt. Patient: OK. Dentist: I''ve been having an affair with your wife since last year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I wonder Why is that frisbee getting bigger? And then it hits me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I made my girlfriend puke She likes dirty talk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cashews are expensive, almonds are expensive. Peanuts are cheaper. How about deer nuts? You find them under a buck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me I should start deadlifting. Otherwise the police would certainly find the body.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear what happened to the tap dancer.. He fell into the sink', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Warning: Game of Thrones Spoilers Will make your car look fucking stupid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People are like bananas Nobody likes the black ones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between fingering and fondling? About 12 years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the Bald Eagle is the symbol of freedom and the Dove is the symbol of peace, what bird is the symbol of love? The swallow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you tell jokes women on their periods? Because they always OVARY-act!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do women have legs? Have you ever seen the mess a snail leaves behind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you titillate an ocelot? You oscillate its tit a lot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cows wear bells Because their horns don''t work', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not easy being a self made man Unless you have an Oedipus complex and a time machine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump and Princess Toadstool have in common? They both say "Im Peach?" in the same tone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady goes to the doctor, for results of a test she took. Doctor: Mrs. Jones, I have some great news for you! Lady: Miss, not Mrs. Doctor: Miss Jones, I have some bad news for you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the marsupial who was rejected at his job interview? He didn''t meet any of the *koala*fications', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentine''s Day is coming But it looks like YOU won''t be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two antennas get married . . . . . . the ceremony was average but the reception was outstanding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman tells her husband that she''s giving up sex for lent... A woman is laying in bed with her husband and says "This year for Lent, I''m going to give up having sex." The husband says, "What? That''s crazy!" She replies, "Well, not with everyone. Just with people I don''t love or care about." Incensed, the husband yells, "How many people are you sleeping with?!" "Just you, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a content Asian woman? Lo-Meintenance', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Piglet: [screaming] Help! Tigger: Oh, relax, Piglet, old pal. There''s no difference between plunging 10,000 feet to the jagged rocks below and tumbling out of bed. Piglet: Oh? Really? . Tigger: Why, sure! [Tigger starts laughing for a few seconds, then puts his right paw on his chin, with his left paw on his right elbow] Tigger: Except for the splat at the end they''re practically similar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Old Man A very old, decrepit old man walked into the catholic church and sat down in a confessional. A priest greeted the old man who proceeded to tell the priest about this beautiful young woman he had met and was having so much fun with. They were partying and spending the night in each other arms and he was just having the best time in the world. So the priest asked him if he and this lady were married. "Oh no, we''re not married," he said. So the priest said, "okay, say 7 Hail Mary''s ..." and the old man said, "What''s a Hail Mary?" The priest said, "Aren''t you catholic?" to which the man replied that he was not. So the priest asked what he was doing there then, and the man said, "Oh, I''m telling everybody."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mommy, how did I get my name? A little girl asks her mother. "You and your sisters all got your name the same way, we named you Rose because when you were a newborn a rose petal landed on your face." She answered. "So my name is Raven because a bird landed on me?" Her sister asked. Mom nodded. "HUUHNALAGAH!!!" The third sister said. "Shut up Refrigerator."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s very difficult to gather mushrooms in Chernobyl they scramble in all directions when you walk up to them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A riddle: "I''m twenty-two. Hold are you, dad?" His dad replies, "Son, I''m your age, plus half of my own." How old is his father? . . . . . . . . . . . . . Answer: 74, Alzheimers just caught him early.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something about my mom''s vagina feels odd to me but I can''t put my finger on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Fireman A man worked at the Fire Dept. and came home one night suggesting to his wife that they could sort of do the same thing as he did when he went to fight fires. He said, "I could come home and say Bell 1 and we could run to the bedroom; Bell 2 and we could take our clothes off; and Bell 3, we could start messing around." So the wife agreed. The next night the man came home and said "Bell 1" and they ran to the bedroom; "Bell 2" and they took off their clothes; "Bell 3" and they began to mess around. Then the wife said "Bell 4." "What does that mean?" he said to which she replied: "More hose, you''re nowhere near the fire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re playing poker like a Buddhist... ...you''re working on the eight fold path', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s wall will cost 21.6 billion, Nasa''s budget is only 19 billion Probably because Mexico has more aliens', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop shows up to a gory car wreck (long) A cop shows up to a gory car wreck and immediately sees several body parts lying around. He takes out his pen and pad to make some notes for his report. "Left arm - found in ditch" "Left leg - found in ditch" ~~"Head - found in bulavard~~ ~~"Head - found in boulavard~~ *kick* "Head - found in ditch"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, I breathed air in modern america. Now the PC police are arresting me for theft of air.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johny To Teacher Little johny was sitting in class doing maths problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, " Johny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left??? "None," Johny replied, " cause the rest would fly away" Teacher, " Well, the answer is four" , but i like the way are you thinking. Johny, teacher i have a question for you, if there were 3 women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, second was biting her cone and third was sucking her cone, which one is married? Teacher ( nervously ), "Well", I guess the third which was sucking the cone, Johny, "No" , the one with the wedding ring on her finger, "but, I like the way you are thinking".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican and a black person are riding in a car. Who''s driving? A cop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most pre-historic vegetables have been lost to time... But the beet goes on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a Jew are sitting on a bridge... ... The man sticks his foot in the water and says, "The water is quite cold." The Jew sticks his nose in and says, "It is also very deep."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of Fibonaccis walk into the bar The first two walk up to the bar. The bartender looks at them sternly and says, "One of you two better fuckin'' order something."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had the worst first day of work ever today! ... looking back, maybe I should have noticed something was sketchy about the job posting... "Now hiring at county jai. Position available: Massage Therapist... Space not provided."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did the proctologist go to college? Pro State University I''ll see myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally quit drinking . . .at about 3 o''clock in the morning. (You guys can have that one.) <3', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a Black guy walks into a bar with a beautiful parrot on his shoulder... The bartender says "Wow, that''s something real special you''ve got there! Where''d you get it?" "Africa!", says the parrot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the vegetables say at the garden party? Lettuce turnip the beet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this man who walked into a bar and..... There was this man who walked into a bar and says to the bartender 10 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What''s the matter?" The man says, "I found out my brother is gay and marrying my best friend." The next day the same man comes in and orders 12 shots of whiskey. The bartenders asks, "What''s wrong this time?" The man says, "I found out that my son is gay." The next day the same man comes in the bar and orders 15 shots of whiskey. Then the bartender asks, "Doesn''t anyone in your family like women?" The man looks up and says, "Apprently my wife does."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not retarded! I just appear slow because my intellect and wit are respectively so massive and quick, that they are subject to relativistic time dilation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the Green Man lives in the Green House and the Blue Man lives in the Blue House, who lives in the White House? The Orange Man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what the best place to get the most unbiased news from? The weather channel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the boy leave the angyr orchestra? There was too much violins', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a metalhead''s favourite spud? Mosh-pitatoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grocery store employee approaches a wise-looking Indian man wearing a turban and a luxuriously long beard The employee tells the man, "Sir, you should see a doctor!" "Why do you say that?" he responds, puzzled. "Because you''re looking a little Sikh!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dolphin goes into the bar. The barman says, ''Well, that was a bloody big tsunami!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do lawyers wear to court? *Lawsuits*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Lady Gaga like her steaks? Raw Raw RaAaAw', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I made an accidental pun today... I guess it was kinda "PUNintentional"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I slept with my girlfriends dad... But she''s a twin so it''s an easy mistake right?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A customer walks in a minute before closing and asks if the store is still open. The clerk responds, "As open as a casket at a funeral. I shouldn''t be, but I am."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Goatse and Donald Trump? None at all. They''re both yuuge assholes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lynx walks into a bar A lynx walks into a bar and says "Hey Barkeep! Mix me up a... ... ... Jackrabbit." The bartender says, "you got it buddy, but what''s with the big paws?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I masturbate with soap Just thought I should come clean', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m thirsty Hello Thursday, I''m Friday. Let''s go out Saturday and have a Sunday', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was trying to understand how horse''s reflexes work And then it hit me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I fucked a fat chick in an elevator. It was wrong in so many levels...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Muslim, a Mexican, and a white Southern voter? A Muslim gets permission to come to America but then they take it back. A Mexican doesn''t wait for permission to come to America but then they send him back. A white Southern voter acts like he''s on a mission to stab America in the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This girl said she never wants to see me again I guess you can say she gave me a wrist-training order', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I could tell you a black joke, but you heard Jamal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Moses comes down from Mt Sinai and stands before the people "I have good news and I have bad news. The good news is that I got him down to ten. The bad news is that he''s adamant about the adultery bit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Liverpool FC have banned the Sun from their stadium. Seems kind of pointless, I mean it always rains in England anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently had sex with a girl who I thought I was legal age A wave of horror came over me when I noticed her toe tag said "15 years old"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the African baby crying? It was going through it''s midlife crisis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Going To The Movies I told my wife I wanted to watch a movie about a billionaire playboy with a penchant for darkness, inflicting violence and dressing up in masks. She got excited and asked, "Are we really go to see *50 Shades*?" I laughed and told her I was talking about *The Lego Batman Movie*.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] I''m going to get lightning bolts tattooed on my penis It never strikes the same place twice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Uncle Ben''s favorite condiment? Aunt Mayonnaise', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s my idea of foreplay? Half an hour of begging', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get on top of a Mexican restaurant? Use an enchiladar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I heard today... Trump''s wall budget is 3 Billion more than NASA''s budget for the year...apparently NASA doesn''t deal with as many aliens as trump does.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dominatrix is busy training a new assistant... I guess she''s showing her the ropes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What pronouns should you use with a chocolate bar? Her/she', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend once asked me, "If you could have any super power in the world what would it be?" I told him: "Cold war Russia"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks the ice cream truck man. boy : "Do you have onion flavoured Ice cream ?" man : " sorry, no I don''t" the boy says " ok" then walks away. the next day the boy comes again " do you have onion flavored ice cream ? " asks the boy again. the man replies " sorry, I don''t have any" the boy walks away but also comes back the next day asking the same question, and gets the same reply the man decides to get onion flavored ice cream just to sell it to the boy, "if he asked for it so many times he probably will buy a lot" he thought. the next day as suspected to boy comes and asks " do you have onion flavored ice cream " the man says : " yes! a whole lot of it too" the boy : " haha that sucks, who would buy that shit" and walks away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My teacher said, because I was acting up in class, I have to do a book report on the largest bone in the arm. Isn''t that humorous?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do politicians always claim to be religious? Because sects sells.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For me, Divorce is like Algebra. I look at my X and wonder Y.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the claustrophobic ninja do when he fell down a well? He flipped out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Country people would usually have a rooster to wake them up and the city people would have an alarm clock So that means that city people wake up to a clock and country people wake up to a cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a person who doesn''t like Soviet Russia? A citizen of Soviet Russia', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She was only a statistician''s daughter but her deviations were anything but standard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be careful this winter... I saw black guys slip on black ice and get black eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She was only a roadworker''s daughter but she sure liked having her asphalt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m eating that p*ssy Teacher asked, Why is your cat with u in school? Kid says (crying), "I heard daddy tell mommy, I''m eating that p*ssy when the kids leave!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a triangle that gets into a car accident? A rektangle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No actually I am not single I am taken For granted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the way little children run towards the waves of the ocean but back up the very last second? That''s the exact same way I flirt with girls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For Valentine''s Day, me and the girlfriend are just gonna stay in and watch a movie. Can anyone recommend a good girlfriend?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Gordon Ramsey like to have sex with a condom? Because he hates it raw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the registered donor who had a car crash on the Golden Gate Bridge? He left his heart in San Francisco.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a McDonalds. He sees an elderly couple with one Happy Meal. They take out all of the food, lay it out on the table, and start splitting it. They split the burger in half, split the fries into two equal piles, etc. But what strikes the man as odd is that only the husband begins eating. So the man walks over and says, "I can buy you another Happy Meal if you like." The elderly woman replies, "Oh no, we share everything." The man waits, and only the old man continues eating. The woman sits there and watches. So he goes back over and says, "Ma''am, I would be *honored* to buy you another Happy Meal." "Oh no," she replies, "you misunderstand. We share *everything*." Slightly exasperated, the man asks, "Then what are you waiting for?" The elderly woman replies, "The dentures, of course!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bought a farewell card for only a penny... It was a good buy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopuss.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde''s phone rang in the middle of the night A blonde''s phone rang in the middle of the night. "Hello?" she said. "Hello," said a voice. "Is this Tommy?" "No," said the blonde. "You must have the wrong number." "Oh, sorry," said the caller. "I hope I didn''t wake you." "Oh, that''s okay," said the blonde. "I had to get up anyway, to answer the phone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the mad scientist deliberately create a huge fire tornado? Some people just want to watch the whirled burn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the US stops minting pennies, 99 deals will disappear because they won''t make cents any more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do squirrels and my girlfriend have in common? Both of them love stuffing their cheeks with nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, look! I''m a 3D printer! "Chris, close the god damn door if you''re taking a shit"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted a new highscore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up as an alter boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something for cooking on a stove. A metallic sculpture of a marijuana leaf. Donald Trump. Tin pot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last night me and my girlfriend watched three DVDs back to back Luckily I was the one facing the TV', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb? Oh. You''re still doing that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once when on a date with a girl who didn''t swallow. There was soup everywhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two goats on top of a hill... There are two goats on top of a hill eating grass. One says to the other I wish this was the kind of grass that gets you high. The other says did we not just climb this hill?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are aspirins white? Because they work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I woke up this morning and my bedside light had turned into a moth... That''s the last time I ever buy a larva lamp&', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anybody here have sex while camping? It''s fucking intense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate left-handed people. Something about them just doesn''t seem right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks his mom why he''s black and she''s white She says, "Don''t even go there. The way that party went, you''re lucky you don''t bark."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The woman in the store A woman walks into a store. Billy the clerk and the manager are talking away, and the woman asks the clerk where some stuff is. Woman: "Excuse me sir, do you know where the Kleenex, toilet paper, ear cleaners, napkins, and tampons are? The manager replies with, "Dear Lord Billy, help her! She''s leaking from every hole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a boy scout and a jew? One comes back from camp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I could tell you a Mexican joke but it would cross the border.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Minecraft Minecraft - the sequel to Mein Kampf', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind guy walks into a bar... A blind guy walks into a bar with his seeing eye dog. He makes his way through the crowded joint to order a beer from the bar. After a few sips the man casually grabs the slack from the leash, and proceeds to swing the dog by its neck around his head like a helicopter. Several terrified patrons scream, "what the hell are you doing?!?" Casually, yet slightly offended, the man replies, "geez, relax, I''m just looking around."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just a list of movies from recent years Everybody wants some: Our Little Sister Victoria, The Neon Demon American Honey; Dr Strange, Son of Saul; The Clan. Love and Friendship - The Club. Room. Wiener-dog. Sausage Party. High Rise. Mustang. Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them. Fast And Furious 7. Arrival, Joy, Zootopia. Deadpool. The Hateful 8.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gynecologist: Do you know what your asshole is doing while you are having an orgasm?? Beautiful young patient: Probably golfing with his buddies...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Nixon say when his pasta got criticized? I am not a cook.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a rebel base and a Pakistan school? I don''t know I''m just a drone pilot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the geologist win his lawsuit? By taking advantage of the quartz system.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone that occasionally likes gloves? Intermitten', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a TechStore She says: "Can i have that TV over there?" The Man on the Counter replies: "No because you''re blonde". The next day the Blonde decides to put on a brunette wig and goes back into the store and asks again: "Can i have that TV over there?" The Man on the Counter, again replies: "No because you''re blonde!" the blonde is completely bewildered at why he knew that she was blonde! so she tries again the next day with a red wig, again the same respone, and so on and on with always different wigs. Then one day she asks: "OKAY! HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT I''M BLONDE?" The man replies: "Because that a f*cking microwave"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rick Astley will let you borrow you any movie in his Pixar collection... Except for one: hes never gonna give you UP!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that there''s a new shortcut in the PC version of GTA V, which when you press it, will cause your character to kill minorities. Alt-right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A jew walks into a bar... It was a dozen kilograms and he sold it for a grand', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which song is the most salty? Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Hey, Jude', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women are sitting at a bus stop... They''re both smoking, and it starts to rain. One if them out her cigarette out, and the other took out a condom to put over the cigarette so she could continue smoking. The woman looks at the one with the condom and says, "wow that''s neat, what is it and where can I get one?" The other woman replies, "it''s a condom, you can get them at any of your locals pharmacies." So the woman walks to a nearby pharmacy. She goes up to the counter and asks the cashier, "hey can I have a pack of condoms please?" The cashier says, "sure what size?" To which she replies, "the size that can fit a camel."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the man say after eating a Big Mac, a McRib, a bucket of KFC, and a Arby''s brisket? Nothing. He died of a heart attack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought some shoes from a drug dealer I don''t know what they were laced with but I kept tripping', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Communism is a trash can ideology When you''re eating out of a trash can it doesn''t sound half bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish man walks into a bar... He sits down and orders a drink. After a while he gets bored and tells the bartender "Bartender... Tell me a funny joke." The bartender tells him "Hitler killed millions of Jews and one clown." The Jewish man, dumbfounded, tells him "... I don''t get it. Why the clown?" The bartender "See, nobody ever gives a shit about the Jews."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kids of the 2010''s will get this... Smartphones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you comfort a grammar buff? There, their, they''re.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floor? It was just a stage he was going through.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('which came first the chicken or the egg? the chicken because eggs cant cum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the sugar hang out with the tomoto? He wanted to ketchup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just bought a replica of the Knight Rider car. The previous owner said it was a *KITT* car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who wins a race between a gay couple and lesbian couple? The lesbians. Because they go lickety split and the gay guys poke ass along.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your gunna tell a joke about a midget being smothered in honey.... Keep it short and sweet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come american cops always lose at pool? Because they always shoot down the black one first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich man needs to paint his entire mansion So he asks to 3 people for the price: A Chinese, a German and a Brazilian. The Chinese says: It''ll cost 2 million dollars. 1,5 million for painting, half a million for profit. The German says: It''ll cost 4 million. 2,5 million for the painting and 1,5 million for profit The Brazilian says: It''ll cost 10 million. You get 4 million, I get 4 million, and give 2 for the Chinese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a joke that was funny in early America, but is even more hilarious in the present day middle east? "Women''s rights" *^ba-dum ^ching*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bass drop In school, I once dropped the base. The kid next to me got severe alkali burns. . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens to a penis after sex? Natural In-Stink', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At church one sunday... I was praying to God about some new trainers i want, when all of a sudden, a tall white haired man appears saying in a deep voice "I A GOD" a little stunned i dont believe the white bearded man, "prove it" i say, then poof my brand new trainers appear before me now, flabbergasted i ask "wow, so out of all the prayers why did you answer mine, about some trainers?" God then looks at me and says "well, i got bored of giving kids in Africa AIDS"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Would you like a drink? "I have a boyfriend!" "I''m the barkeeper you stupid cunt"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our neighbours criticized our new fence We took offense', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('RIP Jobs What did the unemployed cancer cell say? "We should get Jobs"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys were found trespassing in the city lake They were put on trial and the judge called them in one by one Judge: What were you doing in the lake after 9 pm? Man 1: Your honor, I was blowing bubbles. Man 1 exits, Man 2 comes in Judge: What were you doing in the lake after 9 pm? Man 2: Your honor, I was blowing bubbles. Man 2 exits, Man 3 comes in Judge: Dont tell me you were blowing bubbles too. Man 3: No sir my name is Bubbles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man walks into a bar looking sad..... One night a man walks into a bar looking sad. The bartender asks the man what he wants. The man says Oh just a beer. The bartender asked the man Whats wrong,why are you so down today?. The man said My wife and i got into a fight,and she said she wouldnt talk to me for a month. The bartender said So whats wrong with that? The man siad Well the month is up tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the midget fortune teller who escaped prison? They''re a small medium at large.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Surprise oral will make your day Surprise anal will make your hole weak', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman to her girlfriend: My husband got me a dozen roses; tonight I guess I have no choice but to spread eagle with my legs in the air. Girlfriend: Don''t you have a vase?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate seeing penises and people peeing Looks like I am allergic to peanuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever hear that black people have a speech impediment? Not true, its just a myff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once saw a Chupacabras... Baby goats are so adorable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Reposter walked into... /r/jokes. The End', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think I was good in bed..... Until my girlfriend told me she had asthma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son : "Daddy, I fell in love & want to date this awesome girl!" Father : "That''s great son. Who is she?" Son: "It''s Tina, the neighbor''s daughter". Father : "Ohhh I wish you hadn''t said that.I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.Tina is actually your sister." The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later Son : "Daddy, I fell in love again and she is even hotter!" Father : "That''s great son. Who is she?" Son: "It''s Peny, the other neighbor''s daughter." Father : "Ohhhh I wish you hadn''t said that. Peny is also your sister." This went on couple of times and the son was so mad,he went straight to his mother crying. Son : "Mum I am so mad at dad ! I fell in love with six girls but I can''t date any of them because daddy is their father!" The mother hugs him affectionately and says: "My love, you can date whoever you want. Don''t listen to him. He is not your Father."!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''d think glass would taste like rocks.. But it just tastes like blood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sticky? A stick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Richard Spencer squeal after getting punched in the face? *"I''m Nazi bad person here!"*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Australians wear under their pants? Down Undies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can count the number of times I''ve been to Chernobyl on one hand It''s seven', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stoner goes to the doctor A stoner goes to the doctor complaining he sees cats playing soccer every night when he falls asleep. The doctor recommends he stays up for a night. Stoner says ok but he can''t miss the final tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a joke about time travel.... ... But you guys didnt like it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story... Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out the turtle was 6 feet tall and knew karate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who called it election and not.. Pikachu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you never see an African in Olympic swimming? You need water to swim', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so stupid... She brought a spoon to the superbowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl asks a boy "What does your dad do for a living?'''' He replies "He''s a magician." She asks "Is he good?" He says "Yeah, he disappeared 8 years ago."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alec Baldwin has been arrested. His lawyers believe on Trumped up charges.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do we live on a giant rock, but ruled by money? Because paper beats rock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My therapist recommended an anonymous community to me, a narcissist. Said that they gather and discuss their day to day accomplishments, annoyances, etc. I told him I''ve been using Reddit for a couple months now and see no changes. I then saw myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First time grandparents go to visit the new baby After traveling several hours, enjoying dinner, and meeting the baby, the grandparents decided to spend the night. The grandparents, being older, had trouble sleeping. The grandfather rolled over, tapped on the grandmother'' shoulder, and asked, "would you like to do some laundry?" This had been their code word for sex for many years. The grandmother was beside herself. "Here? In your child''s and new grandchild''s house? That''s disgusting!" The grandfather sighed and rolled over. After dosing off for a few hours, the grandmother woke up, tapped the grandfather on the shoulder and said, "I think everyone else is asleep. We can do some laundry now!" The grandfather yawned and replied, "Don''t worry about that, dear. I just had a small load, so I did it by hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one gamer do to the other gamer after he lost? Consoled him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are the polar ice caps melting Because polar bears are a hot animal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde car A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had 200,000 miles on it. One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it''s not legal." "That doesn''t matter," replied the blonde, "If I only can sell the car. "Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the counter in your car back to 50,000 miles. Then it should not be a problem to sell your car anymore." The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?" "No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 60,000 miles on it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A: What comes after 75? B: 76 A: That''s the spirit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to cut and burn myself. Then I took culinary classes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad: You know son, if you keep masterbating, you''re going to go blind Me: Dad, I''m over here', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After death, what is the only organ in the female body which remains warm? My penis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you go to the beach and forget your lunch, what can you eat? Just eat the sand which is there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TV for sale A man walks by a garage sale and he sees a flat screen TV, he asks the seller "how much''s the TV? Seller: 1 Dollar. Man: What? One dollar!, how come it''s so cheap? S: The valume is stuck on the highest option. M: Is that it, is there anything else I should know? S: Nope thats it M: Wow, You can turn that down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy goes to a ballgame... ...finds his seat and sees an elderly fellow in the next row with an empty seat beside him. They get to chatting and he asks if the seat is taken: "Not anymore. My wife and I used to go to all the games together, but she died. This is the first game I''ve been to since!" "Oh, I''m so sorry. Couldn''t you give the ticket to a friend, or a family member?" "Nah. They''re all at the funeral."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me. It means a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two chemists walk into a bar The first one says "I think I''ll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I''ll have water too." The first chemist now has to rethink the assassination.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the weather in Seattle compare to the rest of the United States? It''s Rainier!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sees a pregnant woman laughing He asks the woman, she replies "Nothing, it''s an inside joke!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who stereotypes Asians? A Rice-ist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone has secrets Billy, learned at school that everybody has secrets. So, he decided to take advantage of it. His mom, obviously scared to death: "Here, take 100 euros and say NOTHING to your father about it, okay?" "Okay mommy!" says Billy and leaves the room with a big smile on his face. When his dad came from work, he did the same to him as well: "Daddy, daddy! I found out everything!" Numb, his father puts his hand on his pocket: "Here, take 350 euros and say NOTHING to your mother, okay?" "Okay!" says Billy with a bigger smile on his face. The next morning, on his way to school, he sees the Postman. He thought he could try it to him too: "Mr. Focker, I know everything!" The Postman, the minute he heard it, fell on his knees and wide opened his arms: "Then come to Daddy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men are driving along a rural road when the driver spots a sheep with it''s head stuck in the fence... The driver pulls the car over and walks over to the sheep. The passenger watching this assumes he got out to help. The driver, not having intercourse for the longest time, drops his pants and starts sodomizing the sheep. The passenger is shocked and yells out the window, "What the hell are you doing?!". The driver, mid-stroke yells back, "I''m fucking this sheep, you want some of this?". So the passenger gets out of the car and sticks his head in the fence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Billy drop his ice cream He got run over by the ice-cream truck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy with a wooden eye asked a girl with a hairy lip to the prom... Seeing how nobody else would likely go with them, the boy with the wooden eye asks the girl with the hairy lip, "Would you like to go to Prom with me?". The girl with the hairy lip, surprised and excited says, "Would I!?". "HAIRY LIP", replied the boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Obama''s going to open a home food preservation supply store next It''s called "Yes We Can"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just found out my best friend, Jos, is moving away. !No guey, Jos!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A joke my nursing teacher told the class A new nurse on the psychiatric ward goes into a patient''s room to talk the patient and check up on her. The nurse asks the patient "How are you doing today?" The patient says "That''s no way to address me!" "What do you mean?" replies the nurse "You should address someone of my stature with respect and humility!" said the patient indignantly "Oh, I should? And why is that?" asked the nurse "Because, I am the Queen!" the patient exclamed "Really now? And who told you that?" The nurse asked skeptically "God did!" replied the patient "Did not!" shouted the patient from down the hall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A plane is crashing with President Trump... A plane is crashing with President Trump, an old man, a little boy and the pilot. Dont ask questions. Just accept this situation. :) The plane is nearing the ground and the group is dicussing who gets the only 3 parachutes. President Trump immediately grabs one and says (With a donald trump voice)"I am the new President. I have a lot of great plans for my country. I need a parachute." He takes one and jumps. The pilot then quickly blurts out, "I am the captain of this plane. These are my parachutes. Im taking one." He takes one and jumps. This leaves only the little boy and the old man. The old man quickly says. "You better take the las parachute. Im old and have lived my life. You can still do great things with the time.." He is interrupted by the little boy who says. "You dont have to die! We can both go. President Trump Jumped out with my backpack!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doughnuts make u go nuts What kind of doughnuts do the KKK prefer? White powdered doughnuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A heart of gold. A local charity had never received a donation from the towns banker, so the director made a phone call. Our records show you make $500,000 a year, yet you havent given a penny to charity, the director began. Wouldnt you like to help the community? The banker replied, Did your research show that my mother is ill, with extremely expensive medical bills? Um, no, mumbled the director. Or that my brother is unemployed? Or that my sisters husband left, leaving her broke with four kids? I & I & I had no idea. So, said the banker, if I dont give them any money, why would I give any to you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a job at the strip club. "I help the girls get dressed and undressed." "Great gig. How much?" "Twenty dollars a day." "That''s not very much." "It''s all I can afford."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If 666 is the evil number Then 25.806975... is the root of all evil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about the cow that was able to step over the the electric fence? No one could believe it, it was an udder shock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The substitute teacher''s eyes were crossed She couldn''t control her pupils.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked why my stitches were unravelling but accidentally posted it to a gaming forum last night Turns out it was the wrong thread', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('two lovers were in the heat of passion when all of a sudden the sound of hard breaking and tire screeching was heard from outside They jump out of bed, she rushes to the bathroom to freshen up, he grabs his cloths and heads out the window. 5 minutes later there is a knock on the front door. She goes to open it while setting her dress. When she opens the door the guy she was just making love to was waiting outside. "Honey", says her husband. "We''re way too stressed out" edit: added "husband" for clarification', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Models Why did the models keep tripping on the runway? They were showing off the fall lineup. Badumtss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m getting tired of all the sexual comments about my skirt... "Slut" "You don''t leave a lot to fantasize about" "Why couldn''t you just have worn something under your skirt?" "Dude your balls are visible"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never buy flowers from a monk Only YOU can prevent florist friars', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know? One Direction''s "best song ever" is not actually best song ever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Hitler put his little armies? In his little Sleevies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today marks a very special landmark Whitney Houston has been clean for five years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad pick up line Me: spell me Her: M-E Me: you forgot the D Her: there is no D in me Me: not yet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two Australian math nerds having sex? A square root.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police officer pulls an elderly couple over. A police officer pulls an elderly couple over. The old man is driving. Officer: I pulled you over for speeding. Old man: I wasn''t speeding, you must have the wrong guy. Old lady: You were going 80 miles per hour, don''t lie to the good officer. Old man: Shut your goddamn mouth you old bitch! Officer: I also noticed that you aren''t wearing a seat belt. Old man: I was wearing a seat belt but took it off when you pulled me over. Old lady: You haven''t worn a seat belt in the 60 years I''ve known you. Stop lying to the good officer. Old man: Bitch, I told you to keep your damned mouth shut! Officer: Ma''am, does he always talk to you this way? Old lady: Only when he''s drunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked God "why did you make women so beautiful"? And He replied, "So you will love them" The man continued, "But why did you make them so stupid?" He replied, "So they will love you"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A zoophile, a sadist, a murderer, a necrophile, a pyromaniac and a masochist are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution, bored out of their minds. "Let''s about having sex with a cat?" says the zoophile. "Let''s have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist. "Let''s have sex with the cat, torture it, and then kill it," shouts the murderer. "Let''s have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then fuck it again," says the necrophile. "Let''s have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it, fuck it again and then burn it," says the pyromaniac. Silence took over, and then the masochist says: "Meow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlour and pulled himself slowly and painfully, up onto a stool.. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?" "No, he replied, "Arthritis."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a funk band composed of only plumbers? George Sinkton and the P-Trap All Stars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not addicted to sandpaper... I just need a little something to take the edge off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We read it wrong! Father Joseph had spent the last few months holed up in the Vatican library, trying to unlock the secrets of Christianity by reading all the old scrolls / books available. Day and night he toiled away in his self-administered solitary confinement. Months passed this way, till the Pope started worrying about him. He sent a young priest to check up on him. The priest made his way to the library, climbing down level after level, searching for the ever elusive Joseph. Finally, in the deepest level, he heard whimpers and cries. Concerned, he rushed into the room, and in the corner was Father Joseph, head between his hands, crying. "Father, are you alright? What happened?" inquired the priest. Joseph looked up, tears streaming down his cheek, and said "They said Celebrate...CELEBRATE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Apple Guy died? R.I.P. Isaac Newton', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In class one day, a teacher asks her young students what their dads do for a living NSFW "Sally, what does your daddy do?" "My daddy is a lawyer!" She says, proudly "Jane, what does your daddy do?" "My daddy is a doctor" She exclaims This go on until she gets to Frankie "Frankie, what does your daddy do for a living?" Frankie hangs his head and in a small, timid voice he says "My daddy works in a bar. He dances for other men. Sometimes, if the money is good, he''ll go into the back alley and have sex with them" The teacher is shocked. She gets the other students distracted doing other things and takes Frankie into a quiet corner. "Frankie! Why would you say something like that?!?" Frankie looks up at her and says "I''m sorry! He doesn''t! It''s just that he plays for the Leafs and I was too ashamed to say!!" (Insert any other hockey/sport team in the punchline)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys go to a ski lodge... Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren''t enough rooms so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job!" The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he''s had the same dream, too. Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, "That''s funny I dreamed I was skiing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was contemplating suicide on a bridge. A man was contemplating suicide on a bridge when he looked down and saw a little man with no arms dancing. This cheered him up and made him change his mind about suicide. When he got down off the bridge he approached the little man to thank him. "Thank you, I was going to jump off the bridge until I noticed you dancing. If you can find the good in life even with no arms, I can do the same" "Dancing?" Said the little man. "I wasn''t dancing, me arse is itchy and I can''t scratch it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists removed the right half brain of a man and asked him to count to ten. The man counted, "two, four, six, eight, ten." Then they put the right-half back and removed the left-half, and again asked the man to count to ten. The man counted, "one, three, five, seven, nine." The scientists then removed both halves of the man''s brain, and asked him again to count to ten. The man said, "look, we''re gonna count to ten. We''re gonna count. Because I know numbers, I have the best numbers. All the politicians in Washington can''t count to one-believe me, I''ve counted to one many, many times. They said we couldn''t count to ten. Well, I''m beating all of those people in the polls. We''re gonna count to ten. Everybody, count to ten. Okay? And let me tell you - let me tell you something. I will be the best counting President God has ever created. We are gonna count to so many tens, I tell you. Look at that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Valve had an NHL team... would that be the Mighty VAC''s?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Turns out there are TWO Loch Ness Monsters. One of them is quite mean, but the other actually gives away his forestry tools. A little weird, sure, but it''s always nice to see some random axe of Kind Ness.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what I like about midgets? Very Little.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I lost my watch at a party once... An hour later I saw some guy stepping on it while he was sexually harassing some woman at that party. Infuriated, I immediately went over, punched him and broke his nose. No one does that to a woman, not on my watch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Legolas so fit? He always eats elfy snacks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife doesn''t like vomit jokes. But I do nausea problem with it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people boil pasta in water? It is way too soggy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call huge dancing rocks? Technotonic plates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to my favorite bar last night. A Chinese guy sits down next to me. I ask him "hey, do you know karate or some other martial art"? He says "why, because I''m Asian"? I said "no, because you''re drinking my beer".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Indian man were waiting outside the delivery room. The matron comes out and explains that the hospital has accidentally mixed up the babies. The Scot goes straight in and picks up the brown baby. The Indian says "Are you sure that''s your baby?" The Scot says "No, but there''s no way I''m going to risk leaving here with an English baby."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the only acceptable thing for a Scotsman to wear under his kilt? Lipstick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kindergarten student told his teacher he''d found a cat... A kindergarten student told his teacher he''d found a cat, but it was dead. "How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her student. "Because I pissed in its ear and it didn''t move," answered the child innocently. "You did WHAT?!?!?!" the teacher yelled in shock. "You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went ''Pssst!'' and it didn''t move."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I came up with a science joke... Why are people with diamond shoes so bad for the environment? They have a big carbon footprint...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rule #1 for learning english Their our know rules!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did the chicken cross the road? "To get to the other side" Nope to get to the idiots house. "Oh" knock knock "who''s there?" The chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked her students... A teacher asked her 4th grade students a question every Thursday afternoon at the end of the day saying if they got it right they would not need to come to school Friday. The first week she asks "how many stars in the galaxy?" No students had the answer. The next week she asks"how many grains of sand are there on the beaches in Florida?" Nobody had an answer. The kids were getting frustrated, and little Billy told them "don''t worry, I have an idea." Billy came to school Thursday with 2 billiard balls that were painted black. As the teacher stands up to ask her question at the end of the day, Billy rolls the balls down towards the front of the room. The billiard balls crash against her desk and the students laugh. The teacher shouts "ok! Who is the comedian with the black balls!?" Billy jumps from his seat, strolls toward the door and says "Kevin Hart. See you on Monday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a Fleetwood Mac GPS for my car. It''s useless though. It just keeps telling me to go my own way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes hes lost. A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes hes lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, Excuse me, can you tell me where I am? The man below says: Yes. Youre in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field. You must work in Information Technology, says the balloonist. I do replies the man. How did you know? Well, says the balloonist, everything you have told me is technically correct, but Its of no use to anyone. The man below replies, You must work in management. I do, replies the balloonist, But howd you know?* Well, says the man, you dont know where you are or where youre going, but you expect me to be able to help. Youre in the same position you were before we met, but now its my fault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bear with no teeth A gummy bear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, a Frenchman, a ravishing blonde and a homely brunette... ...are sharing a compartment on a train as it winds its way through the Alps. Every now and then the train passes through a tunnel, during which time the compartment is plunged into complete darkness. On one such occasion, a ringing slap is heard and as the train passes back into daylight, the Frenchman is rubbing his sore, red cheek. The brunette thinks ''I bet that dirty Frenchman fondled the blonde and she struck the pervert.'' The blonde thinks ''I bet that filthy Frenchman was looking to grope me in the dark, mistook the dowdy brunette for me and she slapped the beast.'' The Frenchman thinks ''I bet that perfidious Englishman touched up the blonde in the dark and she slapped me by mistake.'' The Englishman thinks ''I can''t wait for another tunnel so I can slap that French twat again.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A profilactic check-up with the dermatologist at a coal mine. In comes a miner, the doctor tells him to undress and peel back the skin of his penis. "What''s that bubblegum doing there", asked the doctor. "Well, the mines are all sooty and dusty and that''s the only clean place down there." "What''s with the second piece of bubble gum next to it?" "Oh, that one''s Ahmed''s, he has nowhere to put it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the Coco Pops monkey was recently murdered? Tony the Tiger, Snap, Crackle and Pop all got killed too. Police think its the work of a serial killer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor once told me that it''s important to get 8 hours of beauty sleep per day But to be honest I think you need 9', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between sarcasm and lying? I don''t know, I''m just the president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: Dad, I have a question regarding sex with my underage girlfriend. Father: Yes? Son: Could you stop doing that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They should make birth control for men Because it makes more sense to fire blanks than shoot at a bulletproof vest. Recent discoveries will make this joke obsolete, thought I''d give it one more run.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say that counting sheep jumping over a fence makes you to to sleep. However, Donkeys are much more effective... You''re completely out as soon as your ass leaps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you''re attracted to people that look like you. That explains why I like women with big breasts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I invited the girl I''m dating over for dinner. While we were all sat at the table, there was complete silence. It made me feel very uncomfortable. I said, "Why does it feel like there''s an elephant in the room?" "Because there is," said my dad, looking at the girl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t have OCD... I know because I''ve checked 300 times', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish life was like a hairstyle So you could just cut it off and get a new one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Scotsman who works in a cloakroom? Angus McCoatup', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Matchmaker walks into a bar... They see 5 people in there, 2 pair of couples and a stag. One of the couple is a Gothic couple and a Nerdy Couple. The Matchmaker talks to the Gothic couple and says to the couple "You''re gonna laid tonight." The Gothic couple replies "How would you know that?" The Matchmakers states that its because they feel that are emotionally strong for each other. The Matchmaker then goes to the nerdy couple and says "You''re gonna get laid tonight." The nerdy couple ask "Why?" The Matchmaker says its because they are mentally strong for each other. Finally the Matchmaker goes to the stag and says "You''re gonna get laid tonight." The man replies "Really? How do you know?" The matchmaker replies "Because I am physically stronger than you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did God create vaginal mycose? So women too can know what it is to live with an irritated cunt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A women got a wooden breast implant yesterday.... it would be a funny joke if this had a punch line... Wooden tit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a farmer count his cows? With a COWculator... But, what if they all have babies? Then he MOOtiplies them! Man, I''m really milking these puns for more than they''re worth...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I first got my licence my mother always told me... "It''s not you I''m worried about, it''s the other guys." Which is wrong.... Guys aren''t the only problem. *pulls down visor mirror and applies eyeshadow, and lipstick while simultaneously posting to snapchat.*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My new personal trainer encouraged me to do do fifteen push-ups every commercial break on TV Man... I love Netflix!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apple likes to leave things out of their products. The phone I bough from them doesn''t have a headphone jack... and the car I bought from them doesn''t have windows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peanut butter was driving his toast when suddenly... ..there was a jam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What tastes good on pizza but not on pussy? Crust', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that female celebrity who was murdered? Me: Who was it? Dad: I think her first name was Reese Me: Witherspoon? Dad: No it was with a knife', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man named Rob got his identity stolen. I guess you could say he got... *robbed*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just got done doing squats and I gotta say... It''s a huge weight off my shoulders', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the goose say when he found out about flying south? Wanna hear migrate idea?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the midget clairvoyant who escaped from prison the other day? Police are looking for a small medium at large.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Set a fire for a man, And you''ll keep him warm for a night. Set a man on fire, and you keep him warm for the rest of his life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb Just one, unless it''s a black light.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('do androids dream of electric sheep? Not unless they''re Welsh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a lengthy debate, congress finally passed a law banning pedophiles from children''s shoe stores. It was No Minor Feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does a redditor drown? In the sea of reposts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Batman take with his alcohol? Just ice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a fish and he''ll eat for a day. Give a fish a man and he''ll eat for a year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Iraqi friend found a silver lining on the Muslim travel ban My Iraqi friend found a silver lining on the Muslim travel ban. He said "at least my mother-in-law can''t come and visit." Well, at least he found something to laugh about XD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Irish plumbers earn for overtime? Time an'' a Turd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irishman walks into a bar... Just kidding he was born there and never left', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My apologies. Two punjabi neighbours are arguing over whose fence is better. One says, "Your fence isn''t even waterproof. You didn''t picket correctly". The other slaps the first. Enraged the first shouts, "How dare you. What gave you the right to slap me." The second neighbour replies, "It''s not my right, it''s my state. It''s my Pun-job".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in a bar yesterday... when suddenly realised i needed to fart. The music was really loud, so i timed my farts with the beat of the music. After a couple of songs, i started to feel better. I finished my beer and noticed that many people were staring at me. I Then suddenly remembered i had been listening to my iPod', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is this the bus for dyslexic kids? Oops, wrong sub.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m gonna tell you an oxygen and potassium joke, OK?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks down the street wearing a pineapple on his head Another man noticing him and asks: "Umm, sir? Do you realize you have a pineapple on your head?" "Well... yeah", he says. -"But... why?" -"Dude! I wears pineapple on my head every Tuesday!" -"But... today is Wednesday..." The man quickly removes the pineapple from his head and yells: "Oh god, i feel so stupid!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the mortician cross the road? To get to the other suicide', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the robot kill someone with its empty battery? So it would get charged with murder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The English Teacher in India Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I". Student: I is the.... Teacher: Stop! Never put ''is'' after an "I". Always put ''am'' after an "I". Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Did The Orange Say To The Apple Are you really that stupid? Oranges can''t talk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with boobs? One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is your nose in the middle of your face? Because it is the scenter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna know how to brighten the day of everyone on Earth? A few dozen strategically placed warheads should do the trick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A poem. I am a little girl, I have a little thing That when I go to bed, I put my finger in. Now I''m much older, My thing had lost its charm And now it takes 5 fingers, And half my fucking arm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I bought a new chair today Guess you can say I''m SATisfied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What went through Hitler''s mind before he died? "If I wasn''t so distracted by taking over the world I could have killed so many more jews."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the Pope when he is sleepwalking? A Roamin'' Catholic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 drunk guys enter a taxi 3 drunk guys enter a taxi. The taxi driver knew that they were drunk, so he starts the engine and turns it off again. Then said, "we have reached your destination". The 1st guy gives him the money and the 2nd guy says "Thank you". The 3rd guy slaps the driver. The driver is shocked, thinking the 3rd drunkard knew what he did. But then he asks "what was that for?" The 3rd guy replies, " Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best method of transportation for Jews? A dustpan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you crossbreed a Chihuahua with a German Shepherd? A que-nein.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my husband there are 100 days until our baby''s delivery He said "That''s a really long time. You should really use Prime next time".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate German chefs They''re suck kochs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the sound of one hand clapping? Amputees anonymous', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pun competition One day, a man was sitting at home with a beer in hand when he read about a pun competition being held downtown. He got up early the next morning and came up with the best puns he had ever seen, and entered his 10 best puns hoping he would win, but unfortunately no pun in 10 did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Donald Trumps favorite kind of dog? a BORDER collie!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between ET and an illegal alien? ET learned English and wanted to go home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend has a lot of trust issues. Well, one of them does.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a man walks into a bar looking sad... The bartender asks the man what he wants. The man says, Oh, just a beer." The bartender asked the man, What''s wrong, why are you so down today? The man said, My wife and I got into a fight and she said she wouldn''t talk to me for a month. The bartender said, So what''s wrong with that? The man said, Well, the month is up tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Arab porn? XXXPlosive', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the japanese police catch the black man? because he nigeru', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A radio station in Ireland is taking calls to find a word that is commonly used but isn''t in the dictionary yet... The first caller gets through. "Hello! What word do you think should be in the dictionary?" "Goan!" "Goan? Can you use it in a sentence?" "Yeah, go''an fuck yerself!" The caller then begins laughing until the station can cut off his call. After several more calls they get another man, "And what''s your word sir?" "Smee!" "Can you use it in a sentence?" "Aye! S''mee again! Go''an fuck yerself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girls call me shortcut My penis is circumcised and 3 inches long', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does Phil Collins record his songs? In a stu-stu-studio.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cancer runs in my family. July was a very popular month to have babies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('February 10th should be National Fart Day. Because it''s 2/10.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the Difference between Marlin the Fish and Walter White? One''s finding Nemo the other one is funding Chemo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest has diarrhea Holy shit!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many freudians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to screw in the lightbulb and another to hold the peni... LADDER!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump uses a special steroid to stay ahead in the game. Orange juice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a teenage Hitler Zitler', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the first thing Eskimos teach their kids? Don''t eat yellow snow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My stomach hasn''t felt well all day, I''m like a bartender during an earthquake... I''m having trouble controlling my stools.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a girl sleeps with 100 guys she gets called a slut. What do you call a guy who does the same thing? A homosexual.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boyfriend suggesting For Prisma Girl Friend, i am not able to install prisma app in my mobile. Boyfriend: Check your phone storage is full. Girl Friend: Hhmm, is there any alternative of this app? Boy Friend: Yes, Take Selfie Without Make up', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My phone fell from the 20th floor, good thing it was in airplane mode.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When life gives you lemons... why do you use a bra?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Napping at work Sometimes, when I''m sure people can only see the back of my head, I enjoy sneaking in a quick catnap at work. They never last too long though, invariably someone rings the bell telling me they want to get off my bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two vampire bats were hanging arround Suddenlly the first one states: "I''m hungry, I''m going to grab a bite to eat" and he flies off. Half an hour later he returns with a huge smile on his face and blood on his chin. The other bat asks: "Did you get your fill?" "Oh boy did i ever. Do you see that red roofed barn way over there?" "Ahha" "Well beyond that barn there is a huge herde of cows... an all you can eat bufette" So the second bat gets excited and flies off. 45 minutes latter he returnes with a gloom expression and a face full of blood. "Do you see that big church tower over there?" He asks his friend. "Yeah, I see it" "Well I sure as hell didn''t"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A demolition expert goes on stage during open mic night... He proceeds to bring the house down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m sorry I said "nice phone" When you showed me a picture of your baby..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old timers were playing chess in the park. The first one says: "know what I did yesterday? I went to the girls..." "At your old age?" Says the second one as he cuts him off. "How was it?" He asks in anticipation "Much nicer than the boys" Edit: dunno if this translates well enough', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redhead walks into the Dr. Office..... She sits down on the examining table and tells the Doctor "I think I am going to die. I hurt all over. I touch my arm and it hurts, I my head and it hurts. I touch my abdomen and it hurts." The doctor looks at her and says, "Let me guess that you are naturally blonde." "Why yes, How did you guess?" "Because you have a broken finger."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded on an island... The island is 10 miles from shore and without any other possible way to leave, the woman decide swimming is the only way off. The redhead goes first, she manages to make it 3 miles before she gets tired and drowns. The brunette then goes after, she makes it farther than the redhead but still finds herself tired and drowns five miles away from shore. Finally, it''s the blonde''s turn. She makes it five miles before feeling and tired and swims back to the island.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you destroy a feminist in a debate? You ask "what rights do men have that women don''t?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell apart the voices in Donald Trump''s head from the voices in Steve Bannon''s? Trump''s voices mumble praise of himself, Bannon''s shriek racial epithets, and both are silent when Russia Telecom has an outage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We should make all vehicles be driven by Stormtroopers They never hit anything so there would be no accidents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend slept over last night and asked to use my shower this morning... "You can use any soap or shampoo that''s in the shower. I set a clean towel on the counter for you and pushed the stool under the sink so you won''t trip over it." She replied, "I''d prefer it if you flushed any stool down the toilet, but as long as I don''t trip on it I guess we''re okay."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Itching penis I went to a urologist because the head of my penis was itching. He told me I had an infection and that I should soak my penis in alcohol. The itching has stopped but now my Jack Daniels tastes funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t tell whether my new car''s suspension is amazing, or if I''m a sociopath Either way when I ran over that pedestrian I didn''t feel a thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Vegeta name his son Trunks? ...find out on the next episode of Dragon Ball Z', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Americans make the best jokes... Sorry I meant President.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have y''all heard of the cow that produces milk that taste like that stuff of myths? It''s legen-dairy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer''s and Cancer The cancer sucks, but at least I don''t have Alzheimer''s! Wait No I do I can feel the edges of my mind unraveling; each piece, once so firmly put together, slowly falling away from my grasp. To know that the mind, the seat of who you are, can simply... disintegrate, like a mighty sandcastle in the tide... Well, at least I don''t have cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do brides traditionally wear white? So they match the stove, the fridge and the dishwasher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s an amnesiac''s favorite cheese? Camembert', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[short] what is Forrest Gump''s password? 1forrest1', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ice Cream Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was told that the friendship between sodium, potassium, and oxygen was bad. I said, "Na. Pretty sure it is OK." EDIT: Should have switched potassium and oxygen around. Dang it...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t really like food from Spain much but... To chicharrn I guess', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows are standing in a field in Canada in the year 2003. One cow turns to the other and says, "we gotta watch out. I hear mad cow disease has been spreading through the herd." The other cow looks towards him and says, "what are telling me for? I''m not a cow, I''m a duck!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Organic chemistry is difficult Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I faked my death, but hardly anyone attended my funeral Apparently I faked it really badly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Snoop Dogg bust out an umbrella? Fo drizzle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Courtroom antics. Whats the best thing about being the smartest person in a courtroom? Knowing they''ll never find the bodies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between your penis and your tax return? She''ll blow your tax return', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The wife and I have recently been blessed with the pitter patter of tiny feet around our house. I hired a midget butler.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Hindi people fight with each other? Because they can''t have beef!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Wolverine''s favorite author? Lemony Snikt (I''m sorry...)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A chicken goes into the library. A chicken goes into the library, walks up to the librarian, and says, "Book." The librarian says, "You want a book?" "Book" "Any book?" "Book" So the librarian gives the chicken a novel and off it goes. An hour later, the chicken come back and says, "Book-book." The librarian says, "Now you want two books?" "Book-book." So she give a chicken two more novels. The chicken leaves but again comeback an hour later. "Book-book-book." "Three books?" "Book-book-book." So the librarian gives the chicken three books, but she decides she''ll follow the chicken and finds out what is going on? And the chicken crosses the road, goes down the alley, out of town and towards the woods, into the woods and down to the river, down to the swamp, and there is a bull frog. The chicken sets the books down by him. The bullfrog looks at the books and says, "Reddit...Reddit...Reddit..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Jewish man with heartburn? An acidic Jew.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you sitting on the F5 key? Because dat ass is so refreshing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rainn Wilson to star in the next Harry Potter spin off! Fantastic Beets And Where To Find Them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I only lie to people I don''t like. Don''t worry, I like you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Eminem only have one biological kid? He only had one shot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Click here to see a pun ctuation mark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Teacher asks the students.. "Is it possible to insert 2 holes through one hole?" Nobody is able to answer Teacher: "You guys are so stupid. Go and ask your parents and come back tomorrow with an answer." The next day too, nobody is able to answer the question. Teacher: "Well, it seems your parents are stupid as well. See the answer is so simple." Then the teacher makes a circle using his thumb and index finger and keeps it in front of his nostrils. Teacher: "See, it was so simple, yet nobody was able to answer." The next day, a student comes up to the teacher and says, "Sir, my father has asked if it''s possible to insert 7 holes through one hole?" Teacher: "No, that''s impossible." Students: "It is possible, my father said." Teacher : "How?" Student: "Take a flute and shove it up your ass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend didn''t get my RAM joke. DIMM wit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my violence like I like I beer... ... domestic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear is chasing a rabbit They make so much noise a genie pops up, "If you two stop making so much noise and let me go back to sleep I will grant you two wishes each" They agree and the beat goes first : "I want a big dick." /*Poof*/ Done The rabbit thinks about for a while and says: "I want a motorcycle." /*Poof*/Done Bear says: "I want all the bears in the world to be female and always in heat." /*Poof*/Done Rabbit gets on his motorcycle and points at the bear: "I want that bear to be gay." /*WROOOOM*/ Edit spelling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a pen, I have an apple, uh! iStylus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I only date black girls So I don''t have to meet their fathers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes an ISIS joke funny? The execution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I were happy for 25 years. Then we got married.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I redid my entire house with mirrors... You could say it really reflects who I am.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lying bunny? A haretic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you call a Medieval midi music? Midival! Ha! Get it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Load of animals in the back of a lorry.. The cow says "mooooooooove over" The chicken says "fkaaaf"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom and my girlfriend don''t get along. (NSFW?) My mom always blows me off. My girlfriend thinks she''s getting replaced.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sandwich walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender takes one look at him and says, "We don''t serve food here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to build a bridge for karma but I got over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you see the fight between the walnut and the pecan? It was nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is a bit like my dick... It''s long and hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know a youtuber name SoWTF... He is sooo what the fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Journey from $60k College Debt to $115k Net Worth & 816 Credit Score. And all thanks to this community! I started stand up and got beat up. Settlement has been a blessing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Bach have 20 children? His organ didn''t have any stops.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Dicks Nickname is Bing Because noone ever uses it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do electricians say while they meditate? *Ohmmmm...*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the inappropriate strip club patron say when he finally admits he has a problem? I come here too often', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel like most jokes about communism are pretty low effort But at least everyone gets them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Font Designer and a Police Officer Walk Into a Bar... The font designer leaves sans sheriff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do stoners make lousy poker players? Because they keep smoking the pot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you drown a hipster? Throw them into the mainstream.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Stevie Wonder see his friends? He is busy making good music.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A impoverished brother and sister are trying to come up with ways to make a few extra bucks. The sister says "I''m going down to give blood. I hear they''ll pay $20." "Wow," says brother, "I''m going to go donate sperm, I hear that pays $100." The sister angrily leaves the homeless shelter. The next day the brother seeing his sister leaving the homeless shelter he asks, "where are you headed to?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the full chromosome human go to war He was diploid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Chinaman in Paris picks up a girl and takes her to his hotel room. He opens the bedroom window and takes a deep breath. Then, they get into bed together and make love. After a while the Chinaman says, "Excuse me, I am a little tired." He gets out of the bed, goes over to the window, takes a deep breath. Then he rolls under the bed and comes out the other side. He jumps into bed and starts to make love again. After a while, he gets up saying, "Excuse me, I am a little tired." Again, he goes over to the window, and takes a deep breath, then he rolls under the bed and gets out the other side. He jumps back into bed and starts making love once more. When this has happened five times, the girl gets up saying, "Excuse me, I am a little tired, too." She goes over to the window, takes a deep breath of air, looks under the bed and finds four Chinamen there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get gum out of your hair? Cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do cousins come from? Aunt holes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I call my wife Bambi too..... Because I don''t want her shot. Just her mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ate at a Vietnamese restaurant but I used a fork. I guess you could say I made a pho-pas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friend 1: Oi mate can I borrow your phone? Friend 2: Yeah sure, why''d you need it for? F1: Well mines busted and I just wanna call me mum. F2: Oh no problem mate here ya go, just hit redial.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man from Wisconsin is travelling in Mexico... when he comes across a dairy farm. "Buenos noches, do you have any cheeze for sale?" "Buenos, nochez"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am a legal resident of the United States and I have not paid my taxes for the last 15 years. AMA! Thank you for your time. Ask me anything. **EDIT:** Just a moment guys, someone is at my door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old woman walked into a sex toy shop... She wandered in the shop for a couple of minutes and finally she stopped and asked the vendor: How much is this one? He replied: Ma''am, that''s a fire extinguisher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and slides down Nelson''s Column? Winnie Mandela', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Trump stage a photo op of him winning a marathon against a bunch of traffic signs? To show that he was leading the poles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Whos there? Smell mop. (finish this joke in your head)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so ugly that when... ... I passed out at a frat party I woke up with more clothes on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a jacket and he''ll stay warm all winter Teach a man to jacket and he''ll stay warm his whole life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Timing You know the most important part of telling a joke?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy asks his dad what the difference between a fanny and a cunt is Thinking he''s old enough to learn, he tells the boy ''i''ll show you! '' He takes his son upstairs where his wife is sleeping in bed. He lifts the sheets and points to his wife''s vagina and says '' you see that? That''s a fanny'' ''Oooh can i touch it?'' Asks the kid. ''No!! You''ll wake up the cunt! ''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer is milking his cow This is a translation of a Galician joke, feel free to correct any mistake/awkward phrasing A farmer is milking his cow, the cow whips him with her tail. -Fuckin'' cow! The farmer keeps milking the cow, and the cow keeps whipping him. At the third whip, the farmer is really pissed with the cow, so he gets a stool, takes his belt off and ties the cow tail to the ceiling -Not so smart now, aren''t you? His pants fall to the floor, and in that exact moment, his wife enters the cowhouse. +Manolo! What the hell! -Look, if I tell you the truth you would not believe me anyway, so yea, I''m going to fuck this cow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what happens when you take a joke too far? The 45th president of the United States', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While examining me, my dentist asked me if i had recently performed oral sex Embarassed, i asked if i had a pube in my teeth. He said no..there''s shit on your nose', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Parental settings for my virgin wifi? Where are the parental settings for my virgin wifi?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a fish and he''ll eat for a day. Give a man a poisoned fish, and he''ll eat for a lifetime.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve made this new photo app and it''s a thousand times better than Instagram. It''s called Instakilo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian submarine A Russian submarine was sailing,and the captain felt a huge shake.Confused,he ran to Vladimir and asked him: "What was that,was it an earthquake or we hit something?",Vladimir said: "No Captain,Ivan''s girlfriend ran with her lover to Venice", the captain even more confused says:Yeah,but what''s the matter with that and the shake?Vladimir said:Well,there is no more Venice...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentine''s Day Gift A young lady was caught napping one afternoon on Valentine''s Day. She woke up when she heard the doorbell. "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine''s day," she said to her boyfriend. "What do you think it means?" "You''ll know for sure tonight," he replied. That evening, the young man arrived with a small package and gave it to his girlfriend. Delighted, she opened it and found a book entitled "The meaning of dreams."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend said to me the other day, "Why did God give women periods with cramp pains, and men nothing?" I laughed and replied, "Don''t be silly, he gave us women."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Went to Disneyland because my daughter is so obsessed with Mickey Mouse. She was so excited when I got home and told her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Donald Trump use when his fax machine is broken? His alternative fax.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently this was one of the jokes from East Germany before the fall of the Berlin Wall. A citizen orders a Trabant car. The salesman tells him to come back to pick it up in nine years. The customer asks: "Shall I come back in the morning or in the evening then?" "You''re joking, aren''t you?" "No, not at all. It''s just that I need to know whether the plumber can come at 3pm or not." (Credit to anonymous)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an actor that gets employed by trump? Alec Baldwin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think morning sex was the greatest thing ever... Until I started to share a cell with Bubba.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not that the Massacre at Bowling Green didn''t happen... It was just an alternative event.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why has there never been a coup d`tat in america? Because there is no US-embassy in america. (from german tv-satire "Die Anstalt")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the composer find his buddy on social media? He checked his franz liszt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What organization is the best at curve fitting? INTERPOL', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donkey In A Bar This man walks into a bar and sees a donkey. He askes the bartender why is there a donkey in here the bartender says if you can make this donkey laugh I will give you ten thousand dollars. So the man whispers in the donkey''s ear and the donkey started laughing. Then the bartender said if you can make the donkey cry I will give you ten thousand more dollars. So the man turns to an angle where only the donkey can see and the donkey started crying. The bartender couldn''t believe it so he asked the man how did you make the donkey laugh then make the donkey cry? He said first I told the donkey my dick was bigger than his, than I showed him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do astronauts use to cook in space?? Marzipans!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Strange Redneck Nick Name The redneck family down the street always called one of their boys Ant Eater and I could never figure out why. So one day they had a party and I was invited, so I stopped by and finally asked, "Where did Ant Eater get that nick name". With out a pause Ant Eaters brother said "Oh because he slept with our Aunt, and apparently he was good with his tongue. So we call him Aunt Eater!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Come forth and I shall grant you eternal life, said God unto John. But John came in fifth and won a toaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a Muslim parent with an honor roll student! My kid is the bomb', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cockroach break up with his mosquito girlfriend? He saw her sucking someone else.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shall I compare thee to a summer''s day? ''Cause girl you hot as fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son asks for money A young jewish son asks his dad for $5 dollars. The dad responds shocked, "$4 dollars? What do you need $3 dollars for?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump''s cabinet is so dumb that I can get a better one at IKEA.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Could you imagine if someone pulled off Trump''s hair piece? There would be hell toupee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Words can''t express how beautiful you are. But numbers can. 4/10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Germans least favourite drink? Juice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters Two hunters are walking through the woods and having a great time. When all of the sudden one falls to the ground, eyes roll back in their head, and it not breathing. So the other friend calls 911, "Help my friend just died and I do not know what to do!?" The 911 operator says, "Well are you sure he is dead? Can you make sure he is dead?" The operator hears the phone being placed on the ground, and a shot go off. The operator hears the phone being picked back up and the hunter says "Well now what!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why isn''t Barbie pregnant? Because Ken came in a different box', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jim apple Had a very rough time introducing himself in France', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bodybuilder told me he hates protein. No whey!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what pisses me off most about Reddit? [deleted]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pet rock died 1 upvote = 1 pray', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Sean Spicer''s favorite genre of music? Alternative Rock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can I make a wish? Two Men were out fishing when one decides to have a smoke He asks the other guy if he has a lighter He replies "Yes I do!" and hands the other a 10 inch long BIC lighter Surprised the guy asks "Where did you get this?" The guy replies "Oh I have a personal genie." The first man asks "Can I make a wish? " Sure says the other man "Just make sure that you speak clearly cause he is a little hard at hearing" "Ok I will" says the other as he rubs the lamp a genie appears and asks the man what he wants The man says " I want a Million Bucks " The genie says OK and goes back to his bottle and 10 seconds later a million ducks fly over head And the guy says to the other " Your genie realy sucks at hearing doesnt he?" The other man replies "I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trust not the Alien... It almost killed Sigourney Weaver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Christians have the Daily Bread, what do Buddhists have? The Daily Lama', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Get Stoned Before an Auction Even if you don''t win anything, you''ll still be the highest bidder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy gets arrested for taking a dump. -Knock knock -Who''s there? -Police. -Can you wait a little? I''m taking a dump right now. -We know, this phone booth is transparent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if your roommate is gay? His dick tastes like shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t Beethoven find his teacher? Because he was Haydn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife''s an Archaeologist because... She keeps on digging up the past!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi and a priest A rabbi Asked a priest: >Could you ever be promoted in your church? The priest answered, >Well, I could become a bishop The Rabbi asked, >And then? The preist said, >Well, I suppose I could even be an archbishop The rabbi said, >And if you were to be promoted again? The priest answered, >Well, then I would be a cardinal The rabbi inquired once again, to which the priest answered, >I could become the Pope The rabbi asked, >And then? The priest threw up his hands and said, >what more could I become? God himself?! The rabbi calmly replied, >One of our boys made it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did I say to -1? Look Ma! Not real.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I invented the perfect beach accessory for men! A clip-on-tip that attaches to the inside of your suit and peeks out just below the bottom of a guy''s swim trunks. We''re calling it the Billadong.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nice, calm and respectable lady went into..... A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a Frenchman say who lost his dinner whilst trying to find some more? Where did you come from? Where did you go? Where did you come from escargot?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What the difference between a gay guy and a refrigerator. When you put meat in the refrigerator it doesn''t get aids', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So i read this story about a woman who got electrocuted when she dropped her vibrator in the bath It was a total buzzkill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scottish bloke goes on a skiing holiday to Canada This Scottish bloke goes on a skiing holiday to Canada. After a hard day on the slopes he retires to a bar at the bottom of the mountain. After about five or six whiskeys, he looks up and notices a stuffed animal with antlers on the wall. He asks the barman, "What the fuck is that?". The barman says, "It''s a Moose." The Scottish chap says, "Fuck me! How big are the cats?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest.... A priest, an Irishman, a horse, a gorilla, a twelve inch pianist and an infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The bartender says "Is this some kind of a joke?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cockroach break up with his centipede girlfriend? Each time he spreads a couple of her legs she says: It''s not here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens if you don''t pay your exorcist? You get repossessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Bane''s favorite movie? Broke-back Mountain', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a person who is not a nihilist? A De-nihilist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when you take a joke too far? The 45th President of the United States.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor told me I was eating too much meat So I decided to quit cold turkey', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Soviet Russia, a Judge bursts into his chambers laughing *"I''ve just heard the funniest joke about Stalin... ever!"* *"Well, go ahead and tell us."*, the other Judges ask. *"I can''t. I just gave someone a life sentence for it."*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ann and Joe are having an argument "You are like Satan!" screamed Joe. "Their Mom says, "Shh, Joe thats offending." Once Ann left, she said, "Offending to Satan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbit is walking on the railways He is singing: My life is amazing, dumdumdum, my life is long, dum dumdum, dumdumdum dumdumdum dumdumdum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do with dead scientists? Barium', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the pony say anything? Because he was a little hoarse...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Spilt milk I hate how every time I come home and go to the kitchen my flat mate has spilled milk everywhere. How dairy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the over-sized transgender postcard say to the UPS driver? What don''t you understand? I told you, I don''t fit in a male box!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay dinosaur? A megasoreass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reading the news today. Man: A policeman accidentally inserted his truncheon in someone''s umm, ahh, mm. Other Man: Rectum? Man: Damn near killed ''em', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are only two people I know who can kill 70+ people in 2 hours. John wick... and John Wick 2', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you wrap hamsters in duct tape? So they don''t blow up when you fuck ''em.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun is walking down the street... A nun is walking down the street. As she passes a dark alley a man grabs her, pulls her into the alley, rips off her clothes, and ravages her in the most obscene manner possible. As the man is zipping up the nun wails, "Oh No! How am I going to tell Mother Superior I have been sexually violated twice!" The man says, "What do you mean? I only did it once." The nun leans back and says, "Yeah, but you''re going to do it again, aren''t you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make an idiot wonder? [deleted]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence. As he jumped down he sneered at me and I thought, well thats a little condescending.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a situation where a train wreck is happening right in front of your eyes and you can''t do anything about it? Donald Trump', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I identify as all real numbers. Call me by my new pronoun: xeR', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dorothy: Toto, we''re not in Kansas anymore Toto: I know, I miss the rains down in africa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the caveman say when he stumbled upon a pooping dinosaur? "That''s pooposterous!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is The ISIS Cafeteria called? Allahu Snakbar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Yugoslavian jew moves to israel After ww2 most of the (still alive) yugoslavian jews moved to Israel. Shlomo shekelowitz decides to stay in yugoslavia just to test the new socialist regime. After a year he moves to israel. One of his old friends sees him and asks SCHLOMO! Long time we did not see each other ! How is it in Yugoslavia ? Schlomo responds : "I couldn''t complain". His friend responds : "Why did you move here then ?" "I couldn''t complain", Schlomo repeats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my dad to embrace his mistakes. He cried. Then he hugged my sister and me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife got diagnosed with Alzeihmers and Parkinsons last week. I''ve been getting 8 wanks a day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the farmer say after he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor? (I am so sorry).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady goes into a pharmacy and asks for cyanide... A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Bob Ross exorcise his paint brush? He beats the devil out of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and my friends had an argument.... [NSFW] Me and my friends had an argument about what was more fucked up, one of my friends said necrophilia, the other said bestiality. I would''ve said both... But I didn''t want to beat a dead horse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pun contest... A man''s newsletter tells him about a pun contest they are holding. The person who submits the best pun will win $10000. The man thinks, *I could really use that money!* So he decides he will submit some puns. In the hopes of winning the $10000, he submits 10 puns in one letter. He hoped and prayed that at least one pun would win it for him. But no pun in ten did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People are saying that 3.5 years to build the wall is too long, but I''m not worried Government-funded construction projects almost never run over their time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a BMW and a cactus? George Zimmerman has never shot a cactus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the chimpanzee say to the human? No homo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who do you call when you get robbed in Mexico? 9-Juan-Juan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three kids walk into a Pole He was very fat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you always put your left shoe on last? Because when you put one shoe on, the other one is left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Alabaman wife say to her husband when she found out he was cheating? Oh, brother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two thieves break into a man''s house... The man wakes up in the middle of a night and runs down stairs but the thieves escape over the fence so he calls the police. The police get to his house and ask what happened; the mans says: "Well the robbers took off with my personal computer and nothing else before I scared them away", the police officer says "Did you get a look at them? Can you give us a description?" the man says "Well it was dark and I was only half-awake... but if I had to guess, I''d say they looked looked like the kind of people that would download child porn".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between Jared Fogel and a pixie stick? it''s OK for a kid to have a pixie stick in their mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two prostitutes are hanging out on a corner in the 70''s when one asks the other, "Hey, have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?" The other says "No, but I''ve been swung around by the tits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does uranium have in common with a mental ward patient? They''re both unstable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst part about a blizzard in a leper colony? Stepping outside in the morning to find a foot on the roof of your car', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seagull with diarrheia Seagull With Diarrhea told another that it barely Made It To Crowded Beach In Time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I asked a sheep how it is to be a sheep. "Meh..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I know the Mexicans probably think the wall will be too expensive... But they''ll get over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and her child were hugging ... "Mommy," says the child, "am I adopted?" "No, sweetie," replied the mother. "We haven''t managed to find someone who will take you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are walking along, two of them walk into a bar... The third one ducks. I''m sorry. I''m sure many have heard it before. But I haven''t seen it here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mushroom walks into a bar.... Bartender says "sorry sir we don''t serve your kind" mushroom says "why.... I''m a fungi"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump was once asked if he could quote any Bible verses. "Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Deport him and you will never have to feed him again." Donald 20:17', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino. Fuck if I know', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BREAKING: White House staffer leaks that the President was surprised to learn that Checks and Balances didn''t refer just to... bank accounts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats 18 inches long and dangles in front of an asshole? Donald Trumps tie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Moses make his coffee? *hebrews* it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the necrophiliac get a divorce? The rotten bitch split on him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dogs don''t love you... They''re just glad they dont live in China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('18:- can I buy a bottle of wine? Government :- No, that''s illegal and irresponsible. 18:- Can I go $40,000 into debt for education?? Government :- we encourage it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Nazis like dentists? Because they prefer whites', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the Buddhist order from the hot dog stand? Make me one with everything :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad always lived by the motto "Work hard, play hard." Mom made him seek help for his Viagra addiction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus is setting up for supper and he calls Judas over to help. "Judas, please set the table. " Judas complies and sets the table. "Judas, put the food on the table." Judas places the food on the table. "Judas, please call everyone to the table. " Again, he does as he is told and gathers everyone. As they are enjoying the feast Jesus planned and had Judas serve, Jesus gets really serious and says," This will be my last supper with you." He pauses and continues, " One of you will betray me." At which point Judas throws his hands up in a huff," Why do I have to do everything around here?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is Mexico going to be able to pay for the wall? It''s expensive, but I''m sure they''ll get over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Donald Trump and 5 year old? Honestly, somebody tell me because I have no fucking clue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do new iPhones and Donald Trump have in common? Both cost more than they''re worth and create the illusion of superiority without ever delivering.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s red and bad for your teeth? A brick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the muslim in America say ? [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the D.J. say to the Vegetable Farmer? Lettuce turnip the beet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what they say about jokes The cheesier the grater!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boss told me, "You are the worst train driver ever. How many have you derailed this year?" I replied, "I don''t know; it''s hard to keep track".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the musician who named his daughter Sharp? He didn''t have the heart to tell her she was accidental.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a chicken with a centipede? Extra drumsticks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did no one go to work in Mongolian Persia? Because they were always Ilkhanate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a pirate''s favorite letter? It''s the C matey!!!!! Idk I''m high', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men walks into a bar. The fourth man ducks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to know how to keep your guitar sounding good? Stay tuned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please dont tell jokes about domestic abuse... They hit too close to home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to a doctor. Doctor : I don''t know how to tell you this, but you have got to stop masturbating. Patient : But why? Doctor : So that I can fucking examine you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s super marios favorite type of fabric? Denim denim denim.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman are turning into good drivers ...so if ur a good driver watch out for women turning!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Surround yourself with people who have issues. People with issues always have alcohol.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the Zoo the other day and there was a loaf of Hovis in the Lion enclosure - so I went up to the zookeeper and said "What''s that doing in there?" and he said "That? That''s bread in captivity"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can Napoleon return to his place of birth? Of Corsican.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that 80% of Korean businessmen have caddaracts? The other 20% drive Mercedes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... And a table...and a chair...and the waiter...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Princess Diana was on the radio the night she died? She was on the radio, and the dashboard, and the hood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love to Poop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Bowling Green Massacre? No? Neither did the victims.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 nuns are sitting on a bench. A man in a trench coat walks by and flashes them. 2 of the nuns had a stroke. The third couldn''t reach.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every year, millions of people get sick from eating tainted beef. Who the hell is putting their taint on the beef?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cowboy orphan cat limp into the bar? He was looking for the man who shot his paw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I call my wife Bambi She thinks it''s because she''s cute with big brown eyes. But it''s really because I want someone to shoot her mother with a hunting rifle. **Edit:** Some people have accused me of "being a plagiarist" and "stealing other''s jokes"... Their words, not mine... *Pause for comedic value* But seriously, this **is** a version of an Ashlee Barnhill joke. Sorry for the bamboozle fellow redditors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Grizzly has attacked a school! Four are dead! Fortunately, the rest of the salmon are OK and are peacefully continuing upstream.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2018 kids won''t get this Club penguin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man attempts a bar hop... ...and squashes his nuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a sneezing nut sound like? *Ca-shew.*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2017 First UFO lands Alien: "Take me to your leader." *Alien is brought to Pres. Trump. Alien: "Good one! Seriously though. This is important."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nazi spy goes to a bar with a friend "Bartender, I vant two martinis, please." "Dry?" "Zwei, du amerikanisches Schwein!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A plane crashed on the border of two countries, and everyone dies except the pilot. Where you do you bury the survivors? Six feet under a cesspit, till you can no longer hear his screams.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey girl, are you today''s date? Because you''re 2/10.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Iron Man at a dance club Tony Stark is in an electronic dance club, he''s very upset that the D.J is playing subpar music and that the bar is closed. All of this makes Iron Man- Stark raving mad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I met two hipsters today Turns out, the correct term is conjoined twins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t stop shitting out feathers. I think I''ve got Irritable owl syndrome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Since Valentine''s is approaching, my friend posted "I love my girlfriend <3" I knew he liked them young but that is fucking ridiculous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a treadmill the other day... It''s really giving me a run for my money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was really unsuccessful and unpopular until I stood on a globe covered in super glue. Now I have the world at my feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Steve Bannon in a rubber room? Home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a jewish girls number? You roll up her sleeve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do people smoke in concentration camps? MariJEWana', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most common job among spiders? Web designer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Loyalty is very important for my wife... My girlfriend doesn''t care. Funny how different sisters can be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when there is a death at a funeral? A rehearsal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hermaphrodite... A woman gives birth to a baby. Shortly afterward, the doctor comes into the room looking grim faced. The woman sees this and panics. "Doctor, is my baby ok?" "Yes", the doctor replies. "But, Mrs. Johnson, I must tell you that your baby was born an hermaphrodite." "A... hermaphro-whaaat???" "An hermaphrodite, Mrs. Johnson. Essentially, your baby was born with the same body parts pertaining to both a male AND a female." The woman thinks about this. "So... let me get this straight, doctor. You''re telling me that my baby was born with both a penis AND a brain???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New Yorker went for a checkup.. Doctor: We''re sorry, you have Hepatitis B. New Yorker: Damn B, what kind of hepatitis?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I came up with a ''Knock Knock'' joke "Knock Knock" "Who''s there?" "I''ll ask" "I''ll ask who?" "Al- ask- a ... It''s so cold!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I applied for a job at a blacksmiths He asked if ive ever shoed a horse before. I said no but i once told a donkey to fuck off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tattooed people ride in a car, who is driving? The police', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would Freud say comes between fear and sex? Funf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pessimistic Mexican doing math? Negative Juan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Surprise bj I woke up to a surprise blowjob today. I should really start sleeping with my mouth closed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The captain of the Titantic was a vegetarian, his last words were... "Iceberg lettuce leaf"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cuddle with only one person? A cddle, because u weren''t there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his collection except for one. He''s never gonna give you Up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a rapper say after he''s done recording? It''s a rap', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doctor told me to drink a lot of clear liquid So I picked up some vodka and gin on the way home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mammoth walks down the street. All of a sudden a dozen of elephants get out of the corner, see Mammoth, come by and beat the shit out of him. After they left Mammoth stands up, spits broken tusks and says: "Fucking skinheads!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar The first orders a pint. The second orders half a pint. The third orders a quarter pint. The barman says "Fuck you guys" and pours two pints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Nazi walks into a Bar... ... Mitzvah', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of boxer spits on their opponents face? A beat boxer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang a picture.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a clown in prison? A sillycon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Angela Merkel visits Greece Angela Merkel visits Greece. On her way through customs she gets stopped by an officer ''Nationality?'' He asks ''German'' she replies ''Occupation?'' ''No, just visiting''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some guy assaulted me last night with a bat ... I was really impressed with how well he had trained it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An exhibitionist cross path with a 6 yo girl on her way to school. He asks the little girl "Hey, honey, do you know what a phallus is ?" "No mister, I''ve never heard of it" He then gets his raincoat wide open, revealing the erected object and starting to laugh frantically "It''s this ! hahahahaha" To which the child answers "Oh I see, it''s like a dick, but smaller."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the animals left the ark, Noah told them to go forth and multiply. After some while, Noah happened upon two snakes sunning themselves. "Why aren''t you multiplying?" Noah asked. The snakes replied, "We can''t, we''re adders." So Noah and his sons went into the nearby forest and felled some trees. They made a platform of logs onto which they placed the snakes. You see, even adders can multiply on a log table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can he simplify this trigonometric equation? Cos he can''t! Get it? It''s like cosecant. Hahahaha I made this joke in algebra 2 in high school and the class laughed for like 10 minutes straight. I believe it was the best pun of my entire life. 2 years later when I was a senior people still brought up the joke when these trigonometric identities came up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('German girl number One day I asked a sex German girl for her number and she said "SEX SEX SEX. DRY SEX SWINE!" I cowered away in fear Then her friend came up to me and said "She means ''666-3629"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Drunk in taxi A drunk gets into the back of a cab and the driver starts heading down the street. The drunk asks the cabbie, "hey Mac- do you have room up front for a six pack of beer and a pepperoni pizza?" The driver says "sure." The drunk goes "BLLLECCCCHHHHH." (It works much better verbally.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do they call the Hunger Games in France? Battle Royale with Cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a biker gang of bisexual Norse monarchs? The Bikings.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a woman gets a vibrator, It''s seen as a bit of naughty fun. But when a guy orders a 240 volt fuckmaster pro 5000 blow up latex doll, with a 6 speed pulsating pussy, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system. He''s called a pervert!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the guy who proposed to marry his car? He wanted a more engaging driver experience.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you fuse Arab and Indian food? Explosive Diarrhea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My maths teacher just told us a mean joke... I thought he was a coMedian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Funny that when a guy sleeps with tons of girls, he''s a stud.. But when a girl sleeps with tons of guys, somehow Im not one of them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t remember the translation of German "wichtig." I have a feeling it''s important, though.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Steve Bannon so drunk... his liver spots got liver spots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once an emotionally unstable suicide bomber he fell to pieces.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the guys at /incels use for birth control? Their personalities. One hundred percent effective.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stores in Seattle now accept credit cards in canabis stores It''s been a week for green cards in Washington', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife started with this weight loss program... A few months into the program she says to me "It''s been a couple of months and I still look fat. Can you give me a compliment?" I couldn''t really think of anything because she hates when I compliment her on her personality so I said "You have perfect eyesight dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Toothpaste Salesman So a toothpaste company offered a promotion to the salesman who could sell the most toothpaste in one week. After one week they all came back and the boss asked how they did. The first said he sold 100 by going door to door and telling people about the toothpaste, the boss says wow that''s good. The second said he sold 1000 by standing in front of grocery stories and tell people how important toothpaste is, and the boss says wow that''s amazing. The third said I sold 50,000 and the boss asked how that is possible, the salesman then says he went to the local [insert local professional sports arena] NFL game and set up a sign that says FREE CHIPS AND DIP, and when the people tasted the dip they said "wow that dip taste like shit" and the salesman responded by saying "it is, would you like to buy a toothbrush?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American walks into a cheesemaker''s shop in Italy. The cheesemaker greets him with an enthusiastic smile, "*Ciao!* How-a may I help-a you-a?" The American asks, "Do you have any Gouda cheese?" The cheesemaker scowls and turns red in the face, then gesticulates around the room and yells, "It''s-a all-a good-a cheese!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wonder if.. What if the ocean is salty because the land never waves back?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend was giving me my first pedicure I asked her if the tool she was using to rub my feet was called a pedofile.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus fed 2000 Jews fish and bread Hitler made 5 million Jews toast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If waitresses with big boobs work at Hooters, then where do 1 legged waitresses work? IHOP Gives tipping your waitress new meaning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After yoga class, I followed my instructor home and broke into her bedroom window. She screamed and told me I need to leave. I told her "Nah, I''ma stay".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got jailed when I performed a magic trick. Apparently, when I make the kids disappear, I also have to make them reappear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "What do you want?" The horse unable to understand English shits itself and runs out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The past, present and future walked into a bar. And it was tense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest? People care if the vest gets triggered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy asks a girl to prom... She says yes, In preparation, the guy goes to rent a nice suit. He waits in line for a very long time but eventually he gets it. He decides he wants to be a little fancy and so he goes to rent a limo. There''s a large line at the dealer. He waits in line for a very long time but eventually he rents the limo. On the day of the prom, he gets in the limo and begins to drive to the house of his date. There''s a lot of traffic so he waits in line for a very long time but eventually he gets there. He picks up his date and gets to prom without a problem. They dance, have fun etc. Eventually the girl gets thirsty and she asks the guy to go get some drinks. He walks to the punch table and there''s no punch line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Bruno Mars married Venus Williams on Earth, do you think they''d have a Sun? Only if they planet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Adele cross the road? To say Hello from the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend wanted to act out a scene from Fifty Shades of Grey It was the scene where Christian wanted to buy Anastasia a new Audi...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried out for the suicide club But I just couldn''t hang with them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: I hate fucking laundry Dad: Well stop fucking it and fold it already.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Masturbation When I was a teenager my father told me "If you keep doing that you''ll go blind". I said "Can''t I just do it until I need glasses?" Proof: Glasses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man, those UC students after MILO... Must have been Burn-e supporters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 3 types of republicans.. There are 3 camps of GOP supporters: #1 The McCain camp or Republicans #2 The McConnell camp or Republican''ts #3 The Trump Camp or Republicunts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Trump Travel ban was refused due to lack of evidence.. Apparently "I know it, you know it, everybody knows it" wasn''t enough', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it ridiculously easy to overcome the walls of Jerusalem? Because it''s covered in holiness.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blind man fall into the well? Because he couldn''t see that well.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have never gone to bed with an ugly woman, but I have waken up next to some many of them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandpa''s toothbrush Grandpa: I need a new toothbrush becuase one hair of it broke Shopkeeper: why do you want to buy a whole new brush when only one rush hair is broke? Grandpa: It was the only hair left', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde climb the roof of the pub? The drinks were on the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear an overused joke about necrophilia and bestiality? You''re just fucking a dead horse... (Sorry if this is a repost, I heard this at school)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What two types of people don''t care about age, Abortion clinics and necrophiliacs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a mathematician''s favorite thing to find in the woods? A log.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of Bees give the Most Milk? Boo Bees', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To gay guys first aid means Losing your virginity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a poultry farmer and a hooker have in common? They both raise cocks for a living.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wasn''t originally going to get a brain transplant... But then I changed my mind', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Terrorists favourite category to watch on YouTube? Trending. Because all the videos there blow up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pacifism is a martial art. Its moves are designed to bruise the opponent''s knuckles with your face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary had a little lamb The doctor fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my friends like my chromosomes Not enough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cheese say to the other cheese after a game of tennis? That was a "Gouda" Game!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are walking in a park, the brunette says awwww look a dead bird poor thing. The blonde looks up and says where?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Nazi goes to a bar... A Nazi goes to a bar, looks around, and sees an Orthodox Jew sitting at a nearby table. "Barkeep!", he says, "A round on me for everyone but that gentleman right there." Everyone in the bar receives a cocktail, he looks over at the Jew and notices him smiling back. The Nazi is not amused, goes back to the bar "Barkeep! I want to order a second round for everyone but him, and this time make it all top shelf". Nazi looks again at the Jew, sees him STILL smiling back. "Is that Jew an idiot or what?" Bartender responds: "Oh no my friend, that''s the owner."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay midget with great timing? A Metro-Gnome', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was a kid I asked my mum what a couple was... She said: ''Oh, two or three''. Now, she wonders why her marriage didn''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a copy of Mission Impossible 3 among my blu-rays the other day... I thought to myself: ''It''s not really impossible if he''s already done it twice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dinner A husband and a wife sit at the table, having dinner. The woman drops a bit of tomato sauce on her white top. "Och, I look like a pig!" The man nods, "And you dropped tomato sauce on your top!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asks her student a question... "if there''s two birds on a power line and somebody shoots one of them, how many birds are left?" " Zero" the boy said "the others would have flown away" "Actually the correct answer is two" said the teacher "but I like where your heads at." The boy came back to school next day and asked the teacher a question. "If there''s three women sitting on a bench eating ice cream and one is licking their ice cream, one is chomping on theirs and the other is sucking on theirs, which one is married?" The teacher answered "the woman sucking her ice cream." The boy replied "actually it''s the one with the wedding ring but I like where your heads at."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stevie Wonder got a cheese grater for Christmas He said it was the most violent book he''d ever read', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bored Proctologist A Proctologist who got tired of his profession decided to follow his lifelong dream and become a mechanic. After 2 years of school, he took a final exam where he passed with 150 percent. Confused, the Ex Proctologist asked how that was possible. The teacher replied that he received 50 points for correctly disassembling the motor, 50 points for correctly reassembling the motor, and 50 points for doing everything through the exhaust pipe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy caught a priest masterbating... "What are you doing?" asked the boy. I''m Masterbating. You''ll be doing is soon enough." explained the priest. "Why?" asked the boy. "Because my wrist is god damn exhausted!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dentist gives me cavity searches all the time. I think I need a new dentist..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m participating in a marathon this year. I''m the guy that pours cups of water for the runners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Donald Trump say after getting catfished? **FAKE NUDES!**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I gave my cows ecstasy thinking they''ll make more milk But the steaks were high.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the guitar teacher get arrested? Because he was an arsonist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knew this girl that tried to trade sex for adderall. What an attention whore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys were sitting in a bar talking. One was a Doctor, one was a Lawyer, and one was a Biker. After a sip of his martini, the doctor said; "You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I got my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedez. I figure that if she doesn''t like the diamond ring, she will at least like the Mercedez, and she will know that I love her." After finishing his scotch, the lawyer replied; "Well, on my last anniversary, I got my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn''t like the pearls, she would at least like the trip, and she would know that I love her." The Biker then took a big swig from his beer, and said; "Yah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a tee-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn''t like the tee-shirt, she could go fuck herself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me in a nutshell: Agh! What the Hell! Why am I in a nutshell!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I too believe more women should be in Government. That''s why I support Betsy DeVos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What direction was Kanye West facing when his dough was rising? Yeast ;D *cringe*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you should work until your bank account looks like a phone number. I checked my balance and realized, if that was true, I could retire! I have $9.11 in my account.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the squirrel blush after he was hit by a car? He was flattered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 4 letter word for "talks nonstop" I keep trying to enter girl, but it doesn''t work. I think the writers did this wrong.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone and Jason Statham were sitting around a table When they came up for an idea for a TV series based on the lives of classical musicians. They had all the details nailed down: the music, the plot, the decor, etc. However, they couldn''t decide which character each actor was going to play in the series. Eventually, the three came to an agreement. Stallon said: "I like Canon in D, so i''ll be Pachelbel" Statham said: "I like Moonlight Sonata, so i''ll be Beethoven" Schwarzenegger said: "I like Toccata and Fugue, so i''ll be Bach"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A neutron walks into a bar and says "how much for a drink?" The bartender says, "for you, no charge!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Life gives you a cheese grater... You hold it up and say, ''Life''s grate''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do suicide bombers go when they die? All over the place', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of terrorists with music degrees? Al coda', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the famous chain-smoking Dutch painter? Vincent Van Cough', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend found one of my puns so funny that she flew into space and told it to an alien. Unfortunately, the alien didn''t laugh. Personally, I think she took the joke a bit too far.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went by the house I grew up in and asked if I can take a look around, but they said "no" and slammed the door on me My parents can be real jerks sometimes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The dad, husband and pastor of a woman arrive outside a hospital delivery room The nurse stated that the hospital policy only allowed one person to be in the delivery room with the woman. Unfortunately, all 3 became confused when the woman giving birth screamed, "FATHER I NEED YOU".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my men like I like my coffee Made by my mother-in-law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A female weightlifter goes to the doctor A female weightlifter goes to the doctor and says "I''ve been taking steroids that long I''ve grown a cock" Doctor "Anabolic"? Female " No, just a cock"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('taxi A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the sidewalk, and stopped inches from a shop window. For a second, everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look friend, don''t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said he didn''t realize that a little tap could scare him so much. The driver replied, "Sorry, it''s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver - I''ve been driving a hearse for the last 25 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('bad ass A Marine Aviator lands on an Aircraft Carrier. He gets out of his aircraft and has a shoe box under his arm. He goes down to the Mess Hall for lunch, looks around and says " I"m the baddest dude on this ship and I can prove it"! He opens the shoe box and pulls out a snapping turtle. He pokes the turtle in the eyes, it opens its mouth and he pulls his dick out of his pants and puts it into the turtles mouth. The turtle starts biting down, blood is shooting all over and everyone in the Mess Hall is shocked. He pokes the turtle in the eyes again it opens its mouth and he puts his dick back into his pants. He looks around and says " any of you bad enough to do that"! A young Navy Recruit from the back says " I''LL give it a try, just don''t poke me in the eyes"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The biggest question of our generation... Who makes the sandwich in a lesbian relationship?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father-son talk A father asked his 12 year old son if he knew how babies were made, so the kid started crying: I don''t want to know! Please don''t tell me! The confused father asked the boy why he didn''t want to know. "Because when I was 6 I was told the easter bunny wasn''t real. When I was 7 you told me the tooth fart wasn''t real and when I was 10 I found out santa wasn''t real! Now you''re gonna tell me adults don''t actually screw?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s the thing about George Clooney''s wives... Once you''ve seen one, you''ve seen Amal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long are math snakes? 3.14 feet. Well, at least the thon is (I''m so sorry)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can a woman make a man a millionaire? Yes, if he''s a billionaire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens after NASA farts? It apollogises.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Bobby Shmurda go to jail? He was convicted with second degree shmurder', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a chalk of boxlets... Ya never know what yer gonna ship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump heard that some of Patriots weren''t coming to the White House. They say he was deflated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snowman puns to celebrate the snowstorm in my area What do vampires get when they bite snowmen? "Frostbite" What is a snowman''s favorite cereal? "Snowflakes" Why didn''t the snowman answer the question? "He didn''t snow the answer" What does a snowman like to ride? "An icicle" How can you tell a snowman is angry at you? "You get the cold shoulder... or an icy stare"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m almost a millionaire! I have all the zeros, just looking for the one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was having trouble staying awake at work but my coworker beat me to the last cup of coffee in the pot. It''s like they say: if you lose you snooze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does anyone else get as excited about Valentine''s Day coming up as they did about Christmas when they were little? Or is it just because I''m Jewish?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pencil that won''t draw on colored paper? An erase-ist (e-racist).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the doctor say to the annoying patient who didn''t like the way he was stitching up his cut? Suture self.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two black guys are pissing off a dock and into a lake... *Two black guys are pissing off a dock and into a lake...* *...one guy says to the other:* **"Man, this water''s cold!"** *The other guy replies:* **"And deep too!"**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After accidentally shooting his pet with the shrink ray, my friend decided to give the pet away. It''s my newt now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do hipsters love field hockey? Because it''s ice hockey before it gets cool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When are men the smartest? NSFW Before sex, during sex, or after sex? During sex because he''s plugged into miss know it all! Edit: a word', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did a passing motorist say to the elderly SS Officer? Give it some gas grandpa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me to try out a gloryhole, since you can pretend it''s a woman on the other side I''ve sucked 5 dicks so far and I still have no idea how this is supposed to work', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I prayed to god to end violence on earth. He responded to my ticket saying "You shouldn''t have rolled on a PvP server"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man farted every morning when he woke up. His wife got very annoyed and disgusted by this, so she made a plan to get him to stop. One day after the man farted, she said "honey, you know if you keep forcing those farts every morning your guts will slip right out." You see, the wife was a butcher. That night she took some pig''s guts home from the shop in a cooler and stuffed them in the man''s pants while he was sleeping. The next morning the wife woke up and her husband was in the bathroom for the next 2 hours. He comes out and the wife asks what he had been doing in there. The man replied "You were right about my guts dear, but with the help of God and my own two fingers I managed to get them back up there!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only person in my life that told me to smile... Was the camera man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fun fact: there are obese people outside the USA yeah, fat americans on vacation...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone once asked me why I don''t tell ''your mom'' jokes... I responded by saying that ''your mom'' are so overused. Just like your mom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? Mr. Pibb can''t perform.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('for those of you with a sense of humour and are sick of car ads try this when you see a car ad in your mind replace the word "car" with "cat" when you look at your cat he/she will think your ready for the loonie bin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need to find the watch I misplaced But I can''t seem to find the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(NSFW) Someone ordered pizza to the twin towers on 9/11... They got two large plains', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke is ironic. This joke is not ironic. Isn''t that ironic?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People need to learn to live in the moment, because the here and now is a special gift. Thats why I call it the present.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are black people so loud? Because they think we can''t hear them ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friend asked to use my phone to call his mom.. Told him to just hit redial.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Frosty the Snowman''s most favorite comedian? Bill Brrrrr. I''ll see myself out...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] What does a superstitious pimp check every day? His whore-o-scope.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend told me that laughter is the best medicine Now I understand why Jeff Dunham is so sick all the time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of bakery has the fastest service? A Russian bakery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the quickest way to get in touch with your inner self? Single-ply toilet paper', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Clothing related typos... They''re the vest', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Queen Elizabeth may have lived to be 102, but Diana got up to 120 when she died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the church music director''s biggest fear? Crabs on their organ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I said hello to a feminist today. Trials start next week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of cheese is not yours? American cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a seafood disco last night Pulled a mussel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pension office demanded my 86 year old grandfather prove his age. He had no copy of his birth certificate and his driver''s license had long since expired. But, he went to the office and demanded to see his administrator. He took off his hat, showed his white hair and balding head and said, "There, is that proof enough I''m old enough to receive a pension?" The administrator agreed and cut him his check. He proudly returned home to show grandmother and she said, "Great, but you should have taken off your pants and shown him your willy too, you would have got disability benefits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An African immigrant just arrived in Italy and doesn''t know how to make money He asks another immigrant, "So, how do you survive here?" The immigrant says, "Well, it''s very easy. You put up a sign around your neck saying you''re hungry, and let people give you money. 8 hours a day, and you make around 50-60." "Wow", says the African immigrant, "I''ll try to follow your advice. Thank you." After a year, the two meet again. The African immigrant is surprisingly wealthy. He wears a custom made Gucci tuxedo, a Rolex, and his hands are full of golden ornaments. "How did you become so rich?!" the immigrant asks. The African immigrant replies, "I followed your advice. I put a sign saying <I''m an immigrant, I want to go home, please help me>"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do churches hate geometry? There''s too many sins involved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the Koala get the job? He didn''t have... The Koala-fications.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you combine Richard Simmons with Stephen Hawking? A fruit and a vegetable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People keep asking me what I''ll be doing in 3 years time Like come on guys I don''t have 2020 vision', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady has a perfect record in the Super Bowl He''s 5 out of 7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump plan to alleviate world hunger and illegal immigration . . . . . . he''s going to round up all illegal aliens and issue them Soylent Green cards', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a hookers and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a dream last night that I was reading Lord of the Rings to people. Turns out I was just Tolkien in my sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the third member in a German and Russian gangbang? Poland', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A marketing executive walks into a bar I guess it was set too low.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Altoid mean? I''ve always wondered what that word mint', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superman was flying above Metropolis When he saw Wonder Woman sunbathing on the roof of the Justice League, totally naked. Superman thinks to himself, ''Hey, I''m Superman, I could fly down there really fast and fuck Wonder Woman, and she''d never know.'' So Superman flies down and fucks Wonder Woman so fast she doesn''t even see him. When he''s done, Wonder Woman sits up and says "What the fuck was that?", To which the Invisible Man replies, "I dunno, but my asshole is killing me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the chemist shout, noticing only half his water was deuterated? DOH', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does America and Apple both have in common? They both started to de-port when jobs died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This valentines day be sure not to buy flowers from any Monks. Because only you can prevent florist friars!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fat girl in yoga pants at Walmart? Cashier', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 1940 kids will get this A job', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Politics] Is mental gymnastics an Olympic Sport? If it is, Sean Spicer could take home the gold, silver and bronze for the US.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a date for Valentinesday 14. February', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s preparing Mexico for the Olympics. Every Mexican took gold in the pole vault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many gay men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, but it takes the entire ER staff to get it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m gonna name my first kid Robot. That way no matter what he''ll always have a job!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to steal toys from the hobby shop, but they caught me when I started taking the Airfix sets I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren''t for you modelling kits!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Chinese cat say? *mao*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The terra-cotta warriors are fake They were mass-produced in Chinese sweatshops.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about my hairy, cannibalistic uncle? He was an aunt-eater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering a minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried out for suicide club I didn''t make the cut', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the presidential toilet? The Donald Dump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two lesbians in a closet? A Liquor Cabinet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The boys asked, "Grandma, are you watching today''s football match?" She asks which match. "Austria-Hungary". She answers& "Against whom?" Stolen from r/witze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am very happy with my wife. She likes to compliment me from time to time..... Otherday she was telling me that I have the biggest cock among my friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s least favorite state? New Mexico.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Valley Girl say when she could only understand even numbers? I can''t odd', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smokers go out in the cold for 10+ minutes a day and freeze their asses off in the winter and what do they do they get in return? Cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shoveling snow is great exercise \- Satan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Poor farmers Farmers are having an awful time at the moment in Ireland. No grants, no profit, just terrible. John: "Well Tom how are things, how''s the farming?" Tom: "Bad John, I think I''m going to switch from milking cows to raising cocks" John: "Why is that?" Tom: "Well farmers need the cocks to breed with the hens so there will be a rake of money in it." John: "How many cocks have you got?" Tom: "Only the 3, come down to the haggard and I''ll show you. One is normal, one is dyslexic and the other is gay." Cock 1: "Cockle-Doodle-Doo!" Cock 2: "Doodle-Doo-A-Cock!" Cock 3: "Any-Cock''ll-Doo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common? I don''t care if she has either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the joke of the traveler? Wait until he arrives, then he will tell you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cultural Difference A man and his mail order bride, straight from China, are lying in bed when the man suddenly feels the urge to have sex. He looks at his wife and says "Our sex life is kind of boring, we should do something different." "Like what?" inquires his wife. "How about 69?" he replies. The wife ponders a moment and says "That different, yes, but why you want broccoli egg roll and shrimp-fried rice to have sex?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Tumblr bad for you? Because it contains too much Transfat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in my day, we didn''t have MTV... We had to smoke pot and watch the radio!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pretty lady sits next to a man at a bar Man: You''re beautiful. Your definitely going to get laid tonight! Lady: You''re cocky. How do you know that? Man: Because I''m stronger than you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Hispanic sniper? A Puerto-recon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob and Jim walk into a bar "Hey Donkeyboy, get me a drink." The bartender gets him a drink. Bob says, "Donkeyboy, get me another drink." The bartender gets him another drink. Finally, Jim asks the bartender, "Why does he call you Donkeyboy?" "I don''t know. Hehaw-hehaw-he always calls me that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the three greatest lies? a)the check is in the mail b)small is beatiful c)I won''t come in your mouth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A millennial moves house... Knock knock Who dis? New door', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so racist, I would only date from the one true race... ...The human race', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to push Donald Trump into a vat of wet cement but I decided not to... ...It would have really set a bad president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the shittiest part of Object Oriented Programming? Reading the abbreviation backwards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I booked a table for me and my girl... for valentines day. shes going to go mental she hates snooker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love to squeeze my girlfriend when she is on her period. She is like my little ketchup packet .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad Joke It was my birthday an me and my Dad were driving on the highway when we saw a terrible accident. My Dad said "This is the worst accident I''ve seen in 20years!" Well yeah it was my 20th birthday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A museum curator obtains a valuable painting called "The Joke" The painting is put on exhibit, and to celebrate its arrival the museum throws a large party. Everyone there has an amazing time, and leaves very happy. The curator in all his excitement forgets to lock the museum. When he arrives at work the next day, he finds a terrifying sight. The painting is gone, with no trace to be found. He reports the theft, and the police come looking for it. After 4 days, the curator gets a call from the police with more information. "Have you found it?" he asked. The officer responded "No sir, I''m very sorry. We''ve looked everywhere but we can''t find the joke."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The absolute value of zero. lol', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A female gorilla is alone in a cage at a zoo... ... She has become very cranky due to her isolation and has become increasingly aggressive. Her problematic behavior has become a concern of the zookeeper who decides to try to fix it. While trying to come up with a solution he notices the janitor, a very sleazy redneck type and gets an idea. He walks over to him and asks: "Would you be willing to.. perhaps have sex with a gorilla for 500 dollars?" The janitor thinks about it for a while and agrees but on 3 conditions. "First!" He says, "I don''t want to have to kiss her. Understood?" "Yes." Says the zookeeper. "Second!" The janitor says, "I don''t want anyone to know about this!" "Alright" says the zookeeper, "And what''s the third condition?" "I''m going to need a little bit more time to come up with the 500 dollars."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Oxy Tribe is an ancient tribe full of highly smart and intelligent people. So what do you call a stupid Oxy? An oxymoron', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a cannibal call his girlfriend? Cutie pie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse walks into a bar... People begin to quickly, but calmly leave the bar as they realize the potential danger of the situation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the highlight of the bulimic bachelor party? It was when the cake came out of the girl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I won $100 on a radio competition this morning. The DJ called me and said, We are going live in a few seconds, Im going to ask you what youre going to spend your money on and I want you to tell the listeners on air. Okay I replied. He said, 3&2&.1&.. Congratulations to Lefty, our competition winner, what are you going to spend the money on? I said, Im going to spend it on air.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('5% of the time I make typing mistakes while messaging english speaking friends and 95% the German auto-correction will just.. Flicken es...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump ''complained hand towels on Air Force One are not soft enough'' After He Wiped His Ass With The Constitution', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock. Knock. Who is there? Pizza delivery. Pizza delivery who? Pizza Inn. Pizza in whom?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are 50 babies, each holding a gun, called? An infantry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the clown on the loose in the textile factory? The manager was in stitches', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think I have OCD. I Think I Have OCD. I think I have O.C.D. I think I have O.C.D..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Travelling doctors are an interesting idea... ...but they don''t work in practice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the chicken unrecognizable? It crossed too much', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into a voodoo market... She walks up to an old man selling cursed items where she proceeds to say "I would like to buy a magic mirror for my cheating boyfriend so he can break it and have 7 years of bad luck." The old man reaches into his drawer and pulls out a condom. He says "if he''s cheating, then 7 years isn''t enough. If he breaks this, he will get 18."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Over the last few weeks i''ve been collecting details about my life and adding them to spreadsheet on my computer. I''ve really exelled myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We used to have Reagan, Jonny Cash and Bob Hope Now we have Trump, no cash, and no hope.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call when a Programmer pukes at IHop? A Stack Overflow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Phone statistics in third world countries: Phone statistics in third world countries: Boy to Boy 00:00:59 Boy to Mom 00:00:50 Boy to Dad 00:00:30 Boy to Girl 01:23:59 Girl to Girl 05:29:59 Girl to Boy Missed call Husband to Wife 00:00:03 Wife to Husband 14 Missed Calls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vladimir Putin is banning Brazzers saying it''s bad for the psyche. "Psyche". Now I know how to say ''wrist'' in Russian!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a writer, I often correct grammar online and get called a Grammar Nazi because of it. I''m not a Grammar Nazi, okay? I''m just alt-literate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to open a gym for people with fetishes. It''s a great idea in theory, but I''m still trying to work out the kinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to get free internet @ home I live in an apartment complex so I have neighbors left to right and below me. One day I asked my neighbor if he was interested in splitting the cost of my wifi 50/50 so he could also use it. He agreed. I went on to my other neighbor downstairs and asked him the same thing. Now both my neighbors are paying for my wifi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sieg Heil by Covergirl Girls use chemicals to remove polish and no one panics. Hitler does the same thing and everyone loses their minds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a greedy oyster? Shellfish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw someone robbing a store and went to stop him. He hit me with a bag of golden coins. I guess you could say I had some cents knocked into me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my coffee how I like my calculus expressions: Limitless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always carry a bomb around with me ... What is the likelihood of having two bombs in the same place at the same time?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife thinks I''m "selfish in the bedroom". She''s the one that won''t let me sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old People Always Poke Me Old people at wedding always poke me and say You Are the Next . . So, I Started Doing The Same Thing To Them At Funerals', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate weeping willows. They''re too sappy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sexy up skirt... As I knelt down with a pair of size 4 shoes in front of this sexy blonde in a short skirt, I couldnt resist a quick glance at her panties. Hey perv!! she said as she gave me a playful kick. I bet the only reason you work here is to look up girls skirts isnt it? Thats an absolutely ridiculous accusation, miss, I said sternly. I dont fucking work here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus needs love too The night before he was arrested and crucified, his followers started to worry. Christ was still a virgin; wouldnt it be nice to have him experience a little bit of pleasure before he dies? So they asked Mary Magdalene to go to the tent where Christ was resting and seduce him; Mary said she would do it gladly and went in, but five minutes later, she ran out screaming, terrified and furious. The followers asked her what went wrong, and she explained: I slowly undressed, spread my legs and showed Christ my pussy; he looked at it, said What a terrible wound! It should be healed! and gently put his palm on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde took her son to a doctor.. A blonde took her son to a doctor: Doctor, I think my son swallowed a key! I''m so worried Doctor: Calm down and tell me when did this happen? Blonde: About a week ago. Doctor: Why the hell didn''t you bring him to me earlier? Blonde: We had a spare but now that''s also lost', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paper or plastic? I went to buy condoms the other day. I asked the guy if he could double bag it for me. He just looked at me and said "You''re gonna have to do that yourself buddy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a two dimensional shape that works out way too much? A Noneckagon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tennis players got into a shouting match. They made quite a racket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many nuns does it take to change a lightbulb? Nun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend had his appendix removed and was out shooting with his other friends not a day later. Turns out cops don''t like it when you try to kill them. Poor appendix didn''t stand a chance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vladislav There was once a man named Vladislav. He worked an average job, received minimum wage, and was frustrated with his life. One day he received a call from his wife, who told him out of guilt that she had been cheating on him for several months now, and wanted to stop by the house to collect her belongings before she left him. Upon reaching home, the wife saw Vlad sitting on a couch, staring at the wall. "Vladislav..." He looks at her and says with an unmoving expression: "Baby, don''t hurt me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Super Bowl Champions refuse to meet Trump at the White House? Because they were Patriots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Betsy look so distracted Her husband devos her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than /r/jokes? the comments in /r/jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate walks into a bar.. With a wheel on his crotch. The bar tender says "Aye, what''s with the wheel?" Pirate says "arrrrrghhhhhh, it be driving me nuts"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many bacteria does it take to change a lightbulb? One ... no, two ... no, four ... no, eight ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a barbershop and says, do you cut pubic hair? The Barber, a little taken back, says, "well, sure, why not?" The man bares his teeth and says, "Great. Can you get this one?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am annoyed that my wife came up with a girls name for my penis I don''t even know who Ana Conda is!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Masturbating An 8-year-old choir boy catches the priest masturbating. He said, "What are you doing father?" "It''s called masturbating," the priest replied. "You''ll be doing this soon." "Why father?" he asked. "Because my wrist is killing me," the priest replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw an old school friend today and he started bragging about his well paid job, his flash expensive car and his enormous house. Then he took a photo out of his wallet, showed it to me and said. "That''s my wife, isn''t she beautiful"? I looked it at and said "If you think she''s beautiful, you should see my wife" He said "Why, is she a stunner? I said "No, she''s a fucking optometrist!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do call an irrational fear of fake bees? A faux bee, aah!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tugboat captains have been friends for years. They would always cry, "Aye!" and blow their whistles whenever they passed each other. A new crewman asked his boat''s mate, "What do they do that for?" The mate looked surprised and replied, "You mean that you''ve never heard of ... an aye for an aye?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Knock knock*-forever *Knock knock* Who''s there? ..Deja Deja who? *Knock knock* Who''s there? ..Deja Deja who? *Knock knock* Who''s there? ..Deja Deja who? *Knock knock* Who''s there? ..Deja Deja who? *knock knock*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s blue and not very heavy? Light blue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s to coolest member of staff in the hospital? The ultrasound guy. And then who takes the title when he goes on holiday? The hip replacement man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bad joke? POTUS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the guy who couldn''t pay for his exorcism? He got repossessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a dig bick You that read wrong You read that wrong too', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s im season at the White House Peach', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog with no hind legs and balls of steel? Sparky...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes Jeff such a bad boy Racist sessions', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a really smart dinosaur? A Professaur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate breakups. Especially when they try to let you down gently. "It''s not you, it''s me" "I just need some space" "We can still be cousins".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned a few things today. 1. I''m gonna be a dad! 2. I''m gonna be an uncle! 3. My sisters not on the pill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He likes to bury coal He''s a deepholeable', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police in London have found a bomb outside a mosque. They''ve told the public not to panic as they''ve managed to push it inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Instead of The sandy Hook students recieving books... They got Magazines instead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was telling her friend , "I helped my husband become a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him?" "A billionaire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DNA Test :) Dad: Whats ur Result? Son: Ive failed in 5 subjects. Dad: From now Onwards Dont Call Me DAD. Son: Oh Come On Dad! Its my School Test Not a DNA Test.. :-D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife says I never listen. I can prove she''s wrong. That''s because she never says anything', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Redditor posted ten wordplay jokes hoping one would get to the front page... No pun in ten did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Doctor, I want to live very old - Do you drink? - Never, only water. - You smoke? - Oh no, my body is a temple - Do you have crazy nights out dancing while doing cocaine and coming back home to have unprotected sex with multiple partners? - Never, I''m s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and his llama walked into a bar... They ordered a drink and had a good time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the praying mantis cannibalize her boyfriend He refused to eat her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the new emo pizza? It cuts itself', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do fascists hate snowflakes? Because of Stalingrad flashbacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the most poetic videogame character? Sonnet the Hedgehog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I already got a date this valentine''s day. Her name is Emma, Emma Gination.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn''t moved a muscle in over a year? A trophy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the three rings of marriage? The engagement ring, the wedding ring and the suffering.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thyme is actually the most medicinal herb it heals all wounds', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Syrian say about the airline food? He''d say it was awful if he could get on the plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about striking women? I think it''s dreadful, nobody should be striking women.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Working holiday A husband comes home to find his wife with her suitcases packed in the living room. "Where are you going?" he asks. "I''m going to Las Vegas. I can earn $200 for a blow job there, and I figured that I might as well earn money for what I do for you for free." The husband thinks for a moment, goes upstairs, and comes back down, with his suitcase packed as well. "Where are you going?" the wife asks. "I''m coming with you. I want to see how you can live on $200 a year."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love open-minded people. Like JFK and Kurt Cobain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who came first. The chicken or the egg A very embarrassed rooster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom told me some bad news today... She said her joints are getting weaker, so I told her to roll them tighter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family had two boys and a girl named Anne... the brothers shared a common Anne sister.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar... ...and tells the bartender "Give me anything but a Budweiser." So the bartender hands him a beer, the man drinks it, and leaves. Next day, man comes in and says "Give me anything but a Budweiser." Bartender gives him a beer, the man drinks it, and leaves. Next day, he comes back with the same request. The bartender is obviously very curious at this points. So he asks "What is the problem with Budweiser?" The man answers "Well, I once drank 20 Budweisers, went home, and blew chunks." The bartender laughs and says "That would happen to anyone after drinking 20 of any beer." The man looks around sheepishly and whispers "Chunks is my dog''s name."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top tip: buying heroin? Get some extra for later. It''s a bit more-ish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Balding grizzles pass their genes to their offspring or... Bare bears bear bare bears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only every guy gets this..... Morning Wood', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Dr Pepper come in cans? Because his wife left him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bee order a cup of coffee? For a quick buzz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t the pony yell? His voice is too horse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At St. Peter''s Catholic Church in Toronto , they have weekly husband''s marriage seminars. At the session last week, the priest asked Giuseppe, who said he was approaching his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he had managed to stay married to the same woman all these years. Giuseppe replied to the assembled husbands, "Wella, I''va tried to treat her nicea, spenda da money on her, but besta of all is, I tooka her to Italy for the 25th anniversary!" The priest responded, "Giuseppe, you are an amazing inspiration to all the husbands here! Please tell us what you are planning for your wife for your 50th anniversary?" Giuseppe proudly replied, " I gonna go pick her up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey girl look me in the eyes "Mmmmmno" "Why not" "I have a boyfriend. In fact I shouldn''t be here sucking your dick"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only pre-2017 kids will get this A decent public education', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t sleep with any girl... Don''t sleep with any girl that can spell gonorrhea correctly, without looking it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Person 1 to person 2: whats up my brother from another mother Person 2: aren''t we siblings? Person 1: yeah sorry you''re adopted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are lawyers buried deeper than regular people? Because deep down, they''re really nice guys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the least heavy kind of energy? Light Energy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy came into my shoe shop today He said, "I''d like a pair of red shoes please." "Certainly sir," I replied. "What size?" "Size 40." Fucking clown.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thanks to World War I There are now more airplanes in the ocean than their are submarines in the sky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your life is awful, get a rope and a stool ...and find the next tree. Throw the rope over a branch and attach the stool to the rope. Now you''ve got a swing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Nancy suck at foot races? Her boots are made for walking', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 3 year old boy sits next to a pregnant women Boy: Why do you look so fat? Woman: because i have a baby inside Boy: is it a good baby? Woman: yes it''s a very good baby Boy: then why''d you eat it? I know this is an old joke heard it a while ago and told some of my friend and they never heard it so thought you might enjoy it aswell. No need to upvote as i didnt make it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2, but nobody knows how they got in there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone stole my pencil case off my desk and ran with it I guess it''s no longer stationery', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love discussing religion with the cashier at the supermarket Because the customer is always right', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stephen Hawking is a very paranoid man He''s always looking over his shoulder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the high Australian scientist say to his partner Stoichi while holding a broccoli? "Oy Stoichi oy''ma tree! Pretty cool huh?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife what she wanted for Valentine''s Day and she said ''treat me like a princess!'' I''m having her killed in a traffic accident in Paris.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor gave me 4 weeks to live He said he''ll shoot me if I still can''t pay his bill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday someone knocked on my door. When I opened it I was surprised to see Bill Gates standing on my front porch. "Have you accepted the Microsoft Terms and Conditions into your heart?" he asked. Apparently he''s joined the Windows Witnesses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the Catholic Church and Pimples... Pimples don''t come on your face until you turn 10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a millionaire in the white house? A public offender', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Catholics so anti-abortion? Because if women stop having kids, who are the priests going to rape?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Catholic church and sexual abuse... Is a pretty touchy subject if you ask me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not everyone may think digging tunnels is exciting Some may even call it boring', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to reclose an opened bottle of champagne? I don''t know, ask Falcons fans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A female blond police officer pulls over another blond female driver.. Blond police officer: "Can I see your license and registration?" Driver: "What''s a license?" Police officer: "It''s a thing in your purse with your picture on it." Driver: *Fumbles through purse and finds her reflection on a mirror and hands it to the officer* Police officer: *looks in mirror and sees own reflection and hands the mirror back the driver* Police officer: "I''m so sorry for pulling you over, I didn''t know you were a fellow officer, have a great day" *Walks away*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you ever notice that No 2 pencils look alike? It''s true', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no "B" batteries? You would never be able to ask for them without sounding like you have a stutter. "B-Batteries please"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man loses his wife to cancer. Frustrated and depressed, he goes to sleep for the night. We wakes up with a massive erection. Guess you could say he had mourning wood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mirror, a condom and a grain of salt walk into a bar. The grain of salt looks at the mirror and tells him "if e I spill you get 1 year of bad luck", the mirror responds "Well, if I break you get 7 years of bad luck", then the condom interrupts and says "Well, if I break then you''ll have bad luck for the rest of your days".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prism What does a prism make when it doesn''t like something? A disdainbow. What does it make when it wants to fight? A painbow What does it make when it can''t walk? A canebow ...when it needs to get somewhere quickly? A trainbow ...when it really, REALLY needs to get somewhere quickly? A planebow ...when it can only make one color? A plainbow ...when it''s a smart prism? A brainbow ...when it''s baking bread? A grainbow ...when it''s building something? A cranebow ...when it needs to hold on to something? A containbow ...when the Joker is attacking Gotham City? A Bruce Waynebow ...when its name is Tarzan? A Janebow ...when it''s the King of Prisms? A reignbow ...when it''s poisoned? A banebow ...when it''s inside a blood vessel? A veinbow ...when it belongs to a wizard? An arcanebow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Sally go after the bombing? Everywhere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Trump cabinet is truly diverse. I counted at least 3 different shades of white in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than a satellite around Saturn? A probe in Uranus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbors listen to great music. Whether they like it or not.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you bring back Australian gold from an alternate universe. You have AU AU Au.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking late at night. And saw three strong men beating an old lady, i got into the fight ... And we almost kill the bitch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('student loans... that''s it, that''s the joke. It takes like 1000 years to pay off your debt. Longer than it took you to earn your degree.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the first thing Adam said to Eve ? "Stand back .... I don''t know how big this thing is going to grow!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did everyone pass the final confectioner exam? It was a piece of cake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends are like peeing in your pants... Everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nerve impulse... A nerve impulse is caused when a stimulus changes the membrane potential of a neuron and opens voltage-gated sodium channels. This sodiums flows into the neuron and down the axon to the next synapse. So every nerve impuse, everything we experience and every move we make, comes from sodium ions in our cells... No wonder people are so damn salty about everything!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are suicidal people so good at doing laundry. Because they''re good at hanging things.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an empty bottle of Cheese Whiz? Cheese Was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the German sausage say to the French bread? Gluten tag!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We all know a Mexican standoff and a Canadian standoff So an American standoff is when two people are flipping each other off but you know nothing''s going to happen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men go bear hunting. The first man asks, "Have you ever hunted bear before?" The second man replies, "No, but I''ve been fishing in shorts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles? Because he''s a fuckin'' creep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian alcoholic loses the key to car... His wife wakes him from his drunken slumber. "Where are the keys to the car!?" she demands. "Vodka? Whiskey?" he replies. (read with Russian accent)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom has this really weird fetish. She liked dressing up as herself all the time and then acting like a total fucking bitch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I no longer saw the point in swordfighting.... I no longer saw the point in swordfighting after it blinded both my eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest and a rabbi are at a wedding... the priest sees an altar boy, and says, "man I''d really like to screw him." The rabbi responds by saying, "out of what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What city has the most people eating waffles on the beach? San Diego', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two muffins are baking in an oven. One muffin says to the other "Man, it''s hot in here!" The other muffin says "HOLY SHIT, A TALKING MUFFIN?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None. Its a hardware problem.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiting at the bus station Excuse me, sir, have you seen a police officer around? No, not a soul, actually. Very good, now give me your wallet, watch and laptop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My teacher told me if I slept with her I''d get an A for the semester. I love being homeschooled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting pulled over Police officer to a driver: OK, drivers license, vehicle license, first aid kit and warning triangle. Driver: Nah, Ive already got all that. But how much for that funny Captains cap?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to buy my ex chocolate all the time She was such a bitch, I hoped it would kill her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a pound of fat look good? Put a nipple on it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The red man lives in the red house, the orange man lives in the orange house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house. Who lives in the white house? Also the orange man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Republicans are the true snowflakes... they''re white, they''re cold, and if you put enough of em together they''ll shut down public schools EDIT* Thanks for the gold! You popped my gold cherry! its a joke folks. just a joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An android phone and an iPhone meet after a year. **iPhone**: What......the......fuck.....dude? You.....are.....infested.....with.....malware!! **Android Phone**: Fuckers don''t update me. But what happened to you? Why are speaking with a lag? **iPhone**: Fuckers.....updated......me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2100s kids won''t get this Jobs (Robots will take them all)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... and a table... and a chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Buddhist Monk walks up to a hotdog stand. "make me one with everything"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My ex and I didn''t work out because of our birth signs I''m a cancer she was a cunt, her Pisces smelled like a Taurus and she was anything but a Virgo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you are what you eat That explains why I''m such a pussy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 sons Four guys are at a high school reunion and one of them goes to the restroom. The other three guys start talking about how succesful their sons are. Guy 1: My son is so successful he owns a cardealership and just gave his best friend a Ferarri. Guy 2: Thats nothing, my son owns an airliner and just gave his best friend a private jet Guy 3: Well my son is more success than that, he owns an architecture firm and just gave his best friend a castle Guy 4 walks out of the bathroom and walks over to the other 3 guys Guy 4: Hey guys what are we talking about Guy 1: Oh, we are talking about how successful our sons are Guy 4:Well, my son is a Gay stripper Guy 2: You must be so dissappointed with what he''s done with his life Guy 4: Actually, he is doing very well for himself. He just got a Ferrari, a jet, and a castle from his three boyfriends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Android users won''t get this. Update.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is software engineering? It is a bad joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a nurse working on a pirate ship? An Arrrrr - N', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog with no legs? I really doesn''t matter he''s not gonna come.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Windows 10 users won''t get this. Privacy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about identity theft? Sharon is Karen!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two tornados in Las Vegas? They decided to elope after a whirlwind romance!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Beggar To A Rich Person A beggar to a rich person: Sir please give me 10$, i have to drink tea Rich: But you can drink tea only in 5$ Beggar: Sir, my girl friend will drink tea too Rich: Oh, wow a beggar made a girl friend... Beggar: No Sir, Girl friend made me a beggar (few days ago i was the honor of this hotel)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did mummy tower say to the baby tower Here comes the aeroplane!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump did a better job getting people to exercise in 1 month than Michelle Obama did in 8 years Look at all those protesters on the streets!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t French people count to 5? There''s a tree in the way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are vegetables so hard to eat sometimes? The wheelchairs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar waving his gun around A man walks into the bar waving his gun around yelling, "I have 45 calibre Colt 1911 with a seven round magazine plus one in the chamber and I want to know who''s been sleeping with my wife!" A voice from the back of the room called out, "You''re gonna need more ammo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Muhammad go after the bombing? Everywhere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I destroy every string instrument I find... As a part of my vow of non-violins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor! I think I have a concussion! Doctor: "Dont worry, Its all in your head"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t anyone hear psychiatrists in the bathroom? The p is silent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pistachio say to the peanut? Who wants to eat something that starts with P and ends with NUTs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who designed bathtubs? Seriously, I haven''t been able to fully sit comfortably submerged in a bath tub since I was 11.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Spanish Optometrist say to his Patient? Si?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the useless piece of skin on a dick? The man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women keep telling me to "stop itemizing them" Then they go and call me a dickhead', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 2010''s kids will get this... Measles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him! I''ll leave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to the cheerleader when she did the splits? 20 class rings fell out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10 Inch Bic Two Men were out fishing when one decides to have a smoke He asks the other guy if he has a lighter He replies "Yes I do!" and hands the other a 10 inch long cigarette lighter Surprised the guy asks "Where did you get this?" The guy replies "Oh I have a personal genie." The first man asks "Can I make a wish? " Sure says the other man "Just make sure that you speak clearly cause he is a little hard of hearing" "Ok I will" says the other as he rubs the lamp a genie appears and asks the man what he wants The man says " I want a Million Bucks " The genie says OK and goes back to his bottle and 10 seconds later a million ducks fly over head And the guy says to the other " Your genie realy sucks at hearing doesnt he?" The other man replies "I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally spilled spot remover on my dog. It scared the shit out of him and now I need some for my carpet :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, I heard somebody called you an owl today. Who?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only vaccinated kids will get this... Autism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a 2017 Tesla and 50 dead babies? I don''t have a 2017 Tesla in my garage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between E.T. and an illegal immigrant? E.T. learned the language, and eventually went home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I noticed something about the letter "B" Sometimes it makes subtle appearances', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a team-up between a maniac, a random white guy, and the head of the Vatican? Snapped, Cracker and Pope', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a reptile climb a mountain? It scales it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A physicist goes into an ice-cream parlour every week He always orders an ice cream sundae and offers one to the empty stool next to him. One day the owner of the shop asks the physicist, "Why do you do that?" The physicist replies, "Well, quantum mechanics teaches us that there is a chance that the matter above this stool will spontaneously transform into a beautiful woman who will accept my offer of an ice cream and fall in love with me." The owner says, "We have beautiful women come in here all the time. Why don''t you offer one of them an ice cream and maybe she''ll fall in love with you." And the physicist replies, "Yeah, right! What are the odds of THAT happening?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only 1, but the lightbulb has to be willing to change', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only gay men from the 1980s will get this... The gradual acceptance into society. What did you think I was going to say, you sick fucks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar One man says, "give me some h2o" A second man walks in and says, "give me some h2o too" The second man dies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the snowman so upset? Because somebody had stolen his nose and the police didn''t carrot all!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Helen Keller drive? Because she''s a woman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a caterpillar afraid of? A dogapillar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a Mexican guy in a vegetative state? Coma estas?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a French man wearing sandals? Phil-lip Phil-lop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did JayZ call Beyonce before they got married? Feyonce', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was supposed to be filming a porno but I was late to the set. The cameraman phoned me up and said, "Will you be long?" I said, "Yes, around 9 inches."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why California hates Donald Trump? Because life in California is like GTA (Grand Theft Auto).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doctor says i have myopic attendance syndrome I can''t see myself coming in to work today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the Earl of Lemongrab had hair... ...do you think he''d use an acceptable conditioner to keep it soft?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a rabbit with fleas Bugs bunny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you eat your Reese''s? Witherspoon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had to quit my job as a pool cleaner... It was too draining.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The last time I was someone''s type, I was donating blood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to be like Leonardo DiCaprio from Inception. He has a dream job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend is blind, you know what that means... he can''t see.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My belt was looking a bit worn so I bought a new one.. I hope it holds up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Trump administration has chosen the next movie to screen after ''Finding Dory''. True Lies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a Jewish canoe the safest boat to be in? It never tips! Bonus: How do you pick up a Jewish girl? With a dustpan and a broom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 00''s Kids Will Get This Jesus Christ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy meets a girl at the club and takes her home. Before going to his place the girl tells him that she can tell how a man is in bed by the way he opens the door. She tells him, "If a man struggles with the key then that means he is a sloppy lover and he is not the right one for me." The guy then stops, looks at his keys, then stares at the door. After a while of staring, he goes toward the doorknob and before inserting the key he licks the keyhole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Made me laugh more than I should have! What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?! An investigator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Apple update you don''t see coming? An iPatch... I''m sorry...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the little Ethiopian boy get for his 4th birthday? Flowers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I followed Dwayne Johnson for an hour and when he wasn''t looking I slapped his arse. He turned around and punched me in the face. That''s what happens when you hit rock bottom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do divers fall off the boat backwards?? Cuz if they fell forward they wud still be in the boat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the opposite of irony? Wrinkly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and takes a seat. He later gets arrested for petty theft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A German tank commander boasted "One Tiger can take on ten Shermans!" And an American replied "Good thing we have eleven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three men on a boat with a pack of cigarettes and no matches. How did they manage to smoke? They threw a cigarette overboard, and made the boat a cigarette lighter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump keeps calling CNN "fake" news because... it''s consistent with what Melania keeps telling him are "real" orgasms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fat girl with a rape whistle? Optimistic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Japanese man in America with $8932 and 40 cents? A Mill*yen*aire. ...Yeah I know I''m a shitbird.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump and the iPhone 7 have in common? They both think de-porting is the answer when theres no more Jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do girls like the Falcons? Because they like chokers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jobs that dont exist anymore... Steve', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Sultan leave his job at Mattress City? He was already a manager at Ottoman Empire', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a neologasm? It''s a really good neologism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ronaldo hits his head and is injured. Manager shouts ''support his head'' quick! The fans chant ''Ronaldo''s head! Ronaldo''s head!'' Manager shouts ''Call him an ambulance!'' The fans chant ''Ronaldo''s an ambulance! Ronaldo''s an ambulance!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Pair of Slippers and A Dildo Two guys are sitting around talking about what they got their wives for Valentines Day Todd : "So, what did you get your wife for Valentines day?" Mark : "I got her this BEAUTIFUL diamond ring. She shows this thing off wherever she goes. She wears it to the store, out to get the mail, to the gas station, etc. She loves it man. What about you?" Todd : "Well, I got my wife a pair of slippers and a dildo..." Mark : "What the fuck? That''s rather odd for Valentines day don''t ya think?" Todd : "Actually, it makes perfect sense. If she doesn''t like the slippers, then she can go fuck herself"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am awesome at Russian Roulette. I''ve NEVER lost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to the frog parked in a handicap spot? He go toad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first rule of The Liars Club: Tell everybody you''re in the Fight Club', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Harry Potter like to go down hills? Walking j.k. ...rowling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two inmates are caught having sex A senior and junior corrections officer are on patrol and hear two men grunting in the bathroom. They go to investigate the disturbance and find that one inmate is sodomizing the other inmate in one of the bathroom stalls. The two officers break the two inmates up. The junior officer asks where he should take the inmates and whether he should send them to box. The senior officer decides that only the inmate being sodomized should go to solitary confinement. The junior officer, clearly confused asks "why him and not the guy preforming the sodomization?" The senior officer looks at the junior officer and says "he already has his shit packed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a very angry bodybuilder psychologist He had Freud rage', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shorty! Yo'' momma is so short, I can see her feet in her driver''s license. =>#=>#=>#', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would be a great Politician... I''m really good at pissing everyone off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his coffee before it was cool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy buys a horse... When he buys the horse, the salesman says "This horse belonged to a priest, so to make it move you have to say Praise the Lord! and to make it stop you have to say hallelujah." The cowboy takes the horse for a ride. He''s riding the horse but then forgets how to stop it. When he remembers, he says "Hallelujah!" and the horse stops right at the edge of a canyon. After that he thanked God for saving him and yells "Praise the Lord!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Panda who eats, shoots, and leaves? A Pandit. (bandit) OC by BatManBenJamIn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something only 6000bc kids will get THE original OPs mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was startled by a loud fart... I was fartled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2010s Kids won''t get this A good president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only Baby Boomers will get this... The Draft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Y''know what I find odd? Whole numbers that are not divisible by 2.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frank was getting ready to go on a trip to New York for the first time, and was talking to his friend Bill. Bill: While you are in New York, there is a bar that you have to go to. When you walk through the front door, you are handed a free drink. Then you can go to the back room and get laid. Come back up to the bar, and you get another free drink. Then you can get laid again. It goes on like this all night. Frank: That sounds unbelievable. Have you really been there? Bill: No, but my sister has.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Henry VIII has trouble in school, what does he do? He hires a Tudor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell the difference between a Methodist and a Baptist? Methodist will say hi in a liquor store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wrote on my little sisters cast today "They say the lack of brain in a blonde is accounted for with brawn... Guess not"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do clams do for their birthday? They shellibrate...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('only 30''s kids will get this: The holocaust.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard about the famous italian chef that died? He pastaway, here today gone tomato,we cannoli do so much. He will be pizza history!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two soldiers are in a tank Both of them drowned Credit: from a comment by /u/KillarKittens, slightly modified', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Magic Johnson, Charlie Sheen and roughly 250,000 children in Africa have in common? A continuing chance to create a better tomorrow. You **sick** bastards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''70s kids won''t get this Measles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only African people will get this Ebola', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like i like my coffee. I fucking hate coffee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you live in a first world country..... When you''re not dead', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a cucumber and a shark attack? One is a pickle you can make, the other is a pickle you can''t escape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are fights between fictional creatures so boring? Because they always drag on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just because it''s simple, doesn''t mean it''s easy Unless we''re talking about your mom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the doctor The doctor says, "What''s wrong with you?" The man replies, "Doctor, there''s a lot of things wrong, please look me over." The doctor agrees and starts his examination. He''s only barely begun and when he tries to look in the man''s ear, he exclaims, "my God man, there''s a piece of lettuce in there!" The man sighs and says, "I know Doc, and that''s only the tip of the iceberg. "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just heard there was a cure for dyslexia. That''s like music to my arse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call sodium chloride beating someone up with Bruce Lee''s corpse? A salt with a dead Lee weapon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned a new way to stop the pot from boiling over Stick your fucking face in it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call some who kidnaps cats? A kittnapper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Chinese guy covered in iron? A Chink in the Armor OC pls no steal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re American before you go to the bathroom, and you''re American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you while you are in the bathroom? European!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only anti-vaxxers will get this... Polio', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Deaf people seem to be the best at relationships They always let their hands do the talking', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the deal with airline food? Oh wait, there is no deal because it''s overpriced when available.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi is on his deathbed... ...and a friend asks him if he has any last requests. The Rabbi asks his friend to find him a Catholic priest, so that he might convert. Confused, his friend asks, "Rabbi, why? You have been a great teacher and leader of your followers, and you have led a good and honorable Jewish life. Why would you want to become a Catholic now, before you die?" He says, "Eh, better one of them than one of us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The US have been really progressive in the last decade... In 2009 they got their first black president, and this year they got their first orange one!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only Coal Miners Will Get This Black lung disease.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The School Janitor Janitor: I know im just a school janitor, but my eldest son is in M.I.T., his younger brother in Princeton, and my youngest in Harvard. Student: (amazed) Wow, what are they studying? Janitor: Oh no, they are janitors as well.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is leaving me because of my obsession with pasta I''m feeling cannelloni right now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Linkin Park''s web developer spent hours trying to fix a byte ordering bug. He tried so hard and got so far, but in the endian it doesn''t even matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NSA.. Always listening to our customers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 1700''s sailors will get this... Scurvy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frequent browsers of /r/jokes will not get this. Laid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is improve comedy like a dead language? Because it''s Sanscript.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A world without women... ...would be a pain the ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people are into carbon dating. It''s not for me. I dated carbon once, turns out they made everything up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People want to boycott brands because of political and religious views I just want to be able to afford those brands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Reddit and Pornhub? On pornhub they down vote trash', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two brothers Two brothers are in their treehouse and they see a their neighbour undressing through her window. After seeing this the younger brother runs out the treehouse to his room. The older brother finds him and asks him what is wrong the younger brother says: "Mum said if I see that then I''ll turn to stone. I''m already feeling something turn hard."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my soda like I like my women Flat and room temperature.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar And sees 3 pieces of meat hanging from the ceiling. The guy asks, Whats this about? The bartender replies, Well, if you can jump up and slap the meat, you get free drinks for the rest of the night. If you miss, you pay for everyones drinks for the next hour. You wanna do it? The guy replies, Nah, the steaks are too high.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the sperm cross the road? Because you put on the wrong sock this morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dave drowned So at the funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt. Well, it''s what he would have wanted. - Gary Delaney, 2010', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just got my first BMW! Which tires are best for splashing puddles at cyclists and pedestrians?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An evil mathematician makes a plan to multiply binomials It was FOILed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('if your phone is damaged place it in a bowl of rice this will attract Asians who will fix your phone. if no Asians can be attracted with rice try uranium', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a word I just made up? Plagiarism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the funniest pepper? A jajajajajalapeo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dont know how to say the word GIF? Just prounounce the G how its pronounced in gigantic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Welcome to Atlanta where the players play. For two and a half quarters then get blown away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is short, how bout a blowjob? You might not think it''s funny, but my wife found it hilarious.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Da Bomb Guy 1: You da bomb Guy 2: No, you da bomb In America: a compliment. In the Middle East: an argument', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the lawyer name his daughter? Sue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ned Stark''s death was foretold in his daughter''s name Because when he died, she was sans a Stark', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a beehive without an exit? Unbelievable', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy at a bar says to the bartender, "Hey jackass! Get me a beer." The bartender turns around, stares at the guy for a second, and proceeds to serve him a beer. The bartender walks to the other end of the bar, and another guy says "Hey, come on man. Don''t let that jerk treat you that way." The bartender just shrugs and quietly walks away. A few minutes later, once again, the guy shouts "Hey jackass! Get me another beer!" Of course, the bartender obliges and serves him a beer. The other guy says "Look man, you can''t let that guy do that to you. Stand up for yourself! Do you hear what he''s calling you?" This time, the bartender replies, "Oh, that guy? HEE-HAW HEE-HAW HE ALWAYS calls me that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Donald Trump and Aaron Burr? Trump *doesn''t* want to be in the room where it happens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is like a diamond. I don''t have a diamond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If flossing is a pain in the ass you are doing it at the wrong end', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the name of the Greek hero who couldn''t stop swaying from side to side? Oscillates I''m not even going to apologise for this one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fun fact: Betsy Devos'' name contains every letter of the alphabet that she knows of.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, am I dying? "Doctor, am I dying? I hurt all over, I can''t sleep at night, and I have trouble staying conscious" Doctor: Nope, you''re just a college student.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the titanic? About halfway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If two vegans are fighting... ...is it still called a beef?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had dinner with Bernie Sanders and a couple of his staffers last night And when the bill came and nobody reached for it, I eventually took it and paid for it in full plus tip. On our way out Bernie was very happy and exclaimed "That was a great meal, and to think, it was provided to us at no cost!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a Nazi mine A worker calls out to Hitler: "Sir, we are mining too many useless Ores" [Hitler rubs his chin, contemplating] "So mine less" [Grammar Nazi chimes in, from above] "MINE FEWER" [Hitler looks up] "Yes?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recruitment lady on phone - Sir I have two openings for you.. Me - Yes, I know. (Long silence) Her - asshole Me - prefer the other one...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ordered some flowers for my wife from 1800Flowers... Now what is she going to do with a truckload of roses?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mute Child The little kid never said a word, never uttered a syllable his entire life. Parents took him to doctor after doctor - each doctor said "I have no idea why he can''t talk, I can''t find any reason for him to remain silent". So the parents finally gave up and accepted their boy couldn''t speak and as time passed their son got older. The boy had turned twelve and one morning at the breakfast table he suddenly said in a loud voice "**these pancakes taste like shit**. Well, his mom was shocked and dropped the dishes she had in hand. She looked at him and exclaimed "Little Bobby - YOU CAN TALK?!?!", and the boy replied "yeah". She was quiet for a moment as the realization sunk in, and then asked "well, why haven''t you said anything your whole life up until now?". -- He said "everything has been fine ''til now".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three nuns were sitting on a park bench when a flasher walks by The first nun, well, she had a stroke. The second nun, why, she also had a stroke. The third nun didn''t touch it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t usually brag..... I don''t usually brag about my finances, but my credit card company calls me almost every day to tell me my balance is outstanding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you add yeast to soup? A souprise', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My ex always used to annoy me by saying I have terrible aim for a hitman. I miss her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The paranormal community is in an uproar over a recent surge in "black ghost" sightings only near sources of light Despite proof these are shadows, no one knows what (or who) these entities are.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1989 Alaskan Wild life will get this... Oil', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 50,000 BC kids will get this Ugga: Ung bung uhh mang Bunga tankun ung Bunga: Nanga uhh ung tangung uhh...unganun Ugga: Inga Bunga langa ung ugg Ugga? Bunga: Ung bunga uhh tangung angu OOK OOOOOK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican word of the day.. The Mexican word of the day is cashew. Like I''ll cashew outside, how bout dat?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a native american who''s balding? A patchy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can circumsized men ride bikes on the sidewalk? ..or do you have to be a complete dick..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in the 70''s you could hold out your hand and a car would pick you up and take you where you need.... Today we call that child abduction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard the sperm bank gives $50 for your sperm. I have a sock in my room worth $3000.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother-in-law fell in a wishing well. I didn''t know they worked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A set of jumper cables walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I''ll serve you, but don''t start anything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then *poof* & he disappeared without a tres!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Donald Trump''s favorite operating system? Windows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to jail after dropping the soap. I mean gel, learned my lesson the first time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How tall is Betsy DeVos? We don''t know, she can''t measure growth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a bee say when it returns to it''s hive? Honey, I''m home!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The awards ceremony at the dog show went horribly wrong. The trophy maker had a grudge against the show. To shame them, the 6 foot trophy was of a feline''s behind instead of a pedigree dog. Showrunners and dog owners called the event a "Catastrophe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend said she wanted to try and get rid of her "love handles". I told her she would look stupid without any ears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what is cows favorite video sharing website MOOtube', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between your friends and an asshole? I don''t stab my asshole when it talks shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish family? Zero.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do midgets always laugh when they play soccer? Because the grass tickles their balls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the American president when he''s taking his prescription hair-loss medication? ...IM-P.O.T.U.S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overheard at the Gynecologist Office: A blonde, a brunette & red head are waiting to be seen at the Gynecologist office. All three are pregnant. They start talking to eachother about their babies. Brunette: I''m going to have a boy because I was on top during sex. Redhead: Well, I was on the bottom during sex so I''m having a girl. Blonde: Oh my God! I''m going to have puppies!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to a recent study, men on dating sites are more popular if they mention dancing or cooking. Because if theres one thing women love, its a man who can lie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend said she dosent want to be with me anymore I was very suprised that my right hand can talk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Deaf people seem tough to me Because they always let their fists do the talking', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your pitbull loves you when... You wake up with all your limbs intact.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four rappers are asked to think of a word that rhymes with orange Eminem: Door hinge Lil Wayne: nigga Chris brown: orange Lil b: bicycle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend started annoying me with fowl bird puns But toucan play at that game', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks the class to use a sentence with the words defense and defeat. The Mexican rasies his hand and says, "I jumped dee fence with dee feet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Vladimir Putin wanted to poison a Mexican political enemy, would he use pollonium... Or would he be too chicken?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s an insider tip that will save you thousands on your next vacation. Don''t go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t trust anyone with a conspiracy theory, man. I think they are all up to something.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the binary computer cross the road? 01010100 01101111 00100000 01100111 01100101 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101111 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110011 01101001 01100100 01100101', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A piece of string walks into a bar... "Hi, I''d like to be served please." Says the string. "We cannot serve you, as you are only a string." Said the bartender. Upset, the string comes out of the bar, tears apart his ends, and walks back inside. "Hi, I''d like to be served please." Says the string. "Aren''t you just the string I said I won''t serve?" The bartender asks. The string says "Nope, I''m a frayed knot!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cow go to the gym? To work on his calves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is a real asset to the country! Fucking Siri! I said *Ass Hat* not *Asset*!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes when I turn off the lights and masturbate, it feels like Jesus is watching me. Mexican prison is shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a neckbeard get when he''s sick A malady.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('American healthcare be like Ooh no insurance? Bad news you owe $500 I am so sorry! Oh you have insurance! Great news, in that case bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit but fortunately all you would owe is only $700 for deductible and copay!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate housework. You do the dishes and you do the washing. Then six months later you have to start again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife was ecstatic that she was going to have twins... ....being the superstitious woman she is, she went to a fortune teller to see her children''s fortunes. Fortune Teller: "I have great news, and greater news! You see, one child is going to be a very good professional Football player! Your other child, will be an extremely famous musician!" The wife is amazed, and cannot WAIT to tell her husband the news. She gets home, and tells her husband. Yet, she doesn''t get the reaction she had hoped for. The husband goes: "WHAT?!? No child of mine will EVER be a musician!" The husband picks up the nearest lamp, and chucks it towards his wife''s belly. The lamp hit the stomach and shattered. Suddenly, a soft beat was playing from somewhere. A face presses against the mothers stomach and starts.. "*Bum bum bum bum* you hit my brotha but you didn''t hit me! Bum bum bum bum"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took my wife out the other day. What a great shot it was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I built a Rollercoaster park but it''s not as good as a lot of others It definitely has its ups and downs thiugh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('daughter prayer A family was having guests to dinner. At the table, the mother turned to her six-year-old daughter and says, "Dear, would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn''t know what to say," replies the little girl. "Just say what you hear Mommy say, sweetie." Her daughter takes a deep breath, bows her head, and solemnly says, "Dear Lord, why the hell did I invite all these people to dinner?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you never trust harp players? They''re always pulling strings', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a conservative and a liberal walk into a bar. The bartender says, "it''s malt liquor night, in honor of black history month. Can I get you a 40?" The liberal says "sure that sounds all right." The conservative says "no thanks I''m alt-right."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('90s kids won''t get this either Jobs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish are in a tank... Suddenly, one turns to the other and says: "Do you know how to drive this thing?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does one think the unthinkable with an itheberg', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('whats the saddest story called? my wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a hockey player and a hippy? The hockey player showers after three periods.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate captain walks into a bar... ...with a peg leg, a steering wheel hanging from his pants, and a parrot on his shoulder. Bartender: "Excuse me Captain, but you have a steering wheel hanging from your pants!" Pirate: "Arrrrr, I know. It''s driving me nuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a fine line between numerator and denominator but only a fraction of people will get the joke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the joke of the bathroom? I didn''t either; the door was closed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into an online forum.. A man walks into an online forum and tells a joke that nobody really understands. Get it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a fish on the line? You call him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Timmy go during the explosion? **EVERYWHERE**. He had a newfound respect for life after being spared from such a life-changing event. He went to Arizona, Colorado, New York, England, then settled down in Paris with his now-engaged girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son is nearly 21 years old, but he still gets pampered. He says he''s ready for big boy undies, but I''m not sure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jim and Trish are both mental patients. One day Jim jumps into the swimming pool but, doesn''t come up for air. Quick as a flash, Trish sees her friend in trouble, so dives in and pulls him out. Later, the hospital director calls Trish into his office and says ''Trish, Ive got some good news and some bad news. The good news is, we are releasing you as you are obviously sane ''saving anothers life''. But unfortunately, the bad news is that Jim hanged himself in the bathroom ...'' ''Oh no'' Trish replies, ''that''s where I put him to dry !''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Betsy DeVos and a Grizzly Bear? Betsy DeVos is an actual threat to school children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am a serial monogomist I am loyal to my cornflakes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''90s kids won''t get this (cont.) Measles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone loves to talk about how much they support people with mental illness, but they never follow through when I ask them for help Then they''re all like "oh my god" and "calm down" and "sir this is the produce isle please stop crying into the cabbage"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, violets are blue. If he''s busy on Valentines Day... ...the side chick is you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my coffee black and without crackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump calls the media ''fake news'' even when they''re directly quoting something he said/tweeted... ...but since most of the things he says are fake, by transitive property, the news is fake too', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doctor gave me 6 months to live. So I shot him. The judge gave me 20 years. Problem solved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was younger, I really wanted a skateboard but my parents couldn''t afford one; so one morning, I woke up early and went to the garage, I got some wood and some nails& and beat my parents to death. My foster parents bought me 5 skateboards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I searched up why incest porn has become so popular this year. Apparently Alabama just recently got internet connection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking: Betsy DeVos has cancelled.... the subject-verb agreement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do traffic lights and liberals have in common? They stop you turning right.. even though its safe to do so. *And Im sure theres more& please feel free to add !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the wife of a hippy? Mississippi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 1300''s kids will get this.. The Black Plague', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This 60 year old woman was walking along 5th Avenue when she heard a voice from above "You will live to be 100." This 60 year old woman was walking along 5th Avenue when she heard a voice from above "You will live to be 100." She looked around and didn''t see anyone. Again she heard "You will live to be 100." Boy, she thought to herself, that was the voice of God. I''ve got 40 more years to live! So off she went to the plastic surgeon. She got everything fixed from head to toe. When she left the plastic surgeon''s office, she got hit by a bus,died, and went up to heaven. She said to God "You told me I would live to be 100. I was supposed to have had 40 more years. So how come you let the bus kill me?". God said: "I didn''t recognize you".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde A blonde goes to a restaurant, buys a coffee and sits down to drink it. She looks on the side of her cup and she finds a peel-off prize. She pull off the tab and yells, "I WON! I WON! I WON a motor home; I WON a motor home!" The waitress runs over and says, "That''s impossible. The biggest prize given away was a mini van!" The blonde replies, "No. I WON A motor home, I WON a motor home!" By this time the manager makes his way over to the table and says, "You couldn''t possibly have won a motor home because we didn''t have that as a prize!" Again the blonde says, "No, no mistake, I WON a motor home, I WON a motor home!" The blonde hands the prize ticket to the manager and he reads, "WIN A BAGEL."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Subreddits appreciating something usually have one of two titles: Xisbeautiful(r/dataisbeautiful) or Xporn(r/earthporn) Let''s just say that r/internetisbeautiful would have a lot more subscribers if they chose the latter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does your Mum like chicken? No? I bet your Nando''s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When God closes a door He opens a window. THAT''S WHY IT''S SO FUCKING COLD IN HERE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a food that used to be enjoyed by the poor, but is now eaten by the wealthy elite? Gentrifried rice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('!false It''s funny because it''s true.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This morning I woke up to a blow job. Oh wait, my job blows every morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have genetically modified a Venus Fly Trap to have the skin of a cactus They say its bark is worse than its bite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boob, a vagina and an asshole walk into a bar... A boob, a vagina and an asshole walk into a bar and they start debating on who is the greatest of the three of them! Boob - "I give milk to new born babies and I''m attractive to the opposite sex, that''s why I am the greatest!" Vagina - "That''s nothing, I give birth to new born and can accommodate the opposite sex, that''s why I am the greatest!" . . . . . . . . . . Why are you scrolling down? It''s your turn to speak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one drunk muslim say to another? I''m drunk Ash-faq', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you disagree with someone, it is always better to walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you''ll be a mile away from them. And you''ll have their shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Was hit by a rental car earlier today... It still Hertz.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What the best way to get anybody''s pussy wet? Drop their cat in a pool', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the grape say when it got squashed? Nothing; it just let out a little wine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of weather is the most offensive? Darude - Sandstorm', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That awkward moment when you realise your new ''promotion'' involves less power, less money, and less influence.# -DJT', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Ferrari and 3 dead babies... I don''t have a Ferrari in my garage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Got sacked from my drug counselling job just because they didn''t like my motto. ''It''s my way or the highway''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a wolfs favorite puzzle? AWOOObix cube!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an illegal immigrant fighting a child rapist? Alien vs Predator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake, Ryan Gosling. Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake, Ryan Gosling. Shit. I guess I do have an obsession with Britney''s peers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is the type of guy who will look you square in the eye and shake your hand like a man. While taking a piss on your boots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear and a rabbit were taking a shit in the woods The bear turned around and asked the rabbit, "do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?" "No" the rabbit replied. So the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one rad say to the other rad? "arrrr matey!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man describes his dreams to the psychiatrist. Man - "Last night I dreamed that I was a teepee. The night before I dreamed that I was a yurt. What does it mean?" Psychiatrist - "You''re two tents."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows are standing in a field. *The first cow says*: did you hear about that "mad cow disease" that''s going around? That sounds pretty terrible. *The second cow says*: yeah, it does. Good thing us chickens don''t have to worry about that!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Martelleus Bennett is refusing to meat with Donald Trump. Yeah, he''s a real Patriot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GoT joke: What do you call a Dothraki who does jumping jacks every morning? Khal Isthenics.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The restaurant Hooters is known for two things... ...boobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks a girl to prom.., ..and she says yes. Overexcited, he is told he must show up with a limo and a tuxedo. So he goes to the limo rental and waits in the limo line, and he gets the limo. Then, he goes to the tuxedo rental and waits in the tuxedo line. Finally, the big day comes, and he brings his date to prom. She asks him to get some punch. He goes over to get some punch, and realizes there is no punch line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a mathematician solve their constipation? They work it out with a pencil', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the music award show in Canada called the Junos? Because everytime someone wins, everyone goes "Juno who that is?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to have diarrhea ...but then I got my shit together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you have a date for Valentine''s Day? Yes February 14th.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did gravity and magnetism hook up? We don''t fully know, but there were definitely forces of attraction at work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a couple that was married 50 years They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the man said to his wife, "Just think, honey, we''ve been married for 50 years." "Yeah," she replied, "Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together." "I know," the man said, "We were probably sitting here naked as jaybirds fifty years ago." "Well," she snickered, "What do you say...should we get naked?" Where upon the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table. "You know, honey," the lady breathlessly replied, "My nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago." "I wouldn''t be surprised," replied Gramps. "One''s in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('....so then my wife told me to run out and get her some Head & Shoulders "......nevertheless, this court still finds you guilty Mr. Dahmer"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do hummingbirds hum? They forgot the lyrics', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Andy has 150 candy bars. He eats 125. What does Andy have now? Andy has diabetes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did a scientist install a door knocker? coz he wanted to win a no-bell prize!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you teach someone to make an omelette? Show them an eggsample', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve never understood giving flowers to someone on Valentine''s Day. "Here''s a dying plant... because i love you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would call Donald Trump a cunt but he lacks both depth and warmth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I Heard Facebook has got a new fake news filter. All I wanna know is when they''re gonna get the real one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Betsy Devos and Jared from Subway have in common? Both of their main goal is to fuck children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about all the missing women in the area? No? Thats good then...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two employees are standing next to a water cooler talking... One says to the other "Yaknow, our boss says we should be extraordinary but he''s average in more ways than one" "Yeah," says the other "you could say he''s a double standard!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex with no strings attached? Don''t shag a puppet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best thing about Betsy DeVos being nominated as the head of department of education ... is the fact they are abolishing it completely.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think my cellmate was gay last time I went to jail His dick tasted like shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What piece of sporting equipment is best for provoking a debate? Discus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people just have a way with words and other people & oh & not have way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stranger: "I''ve got no friends." Me: "You''re not alone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prison sex... It''s con-sensual.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do cows produce during an earthquake? MILKSHAKE!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two whales walk into a bar.... The first one says: "AOOOOOUUUUUOOOUUUUGGGAAAAUUUOOOOOOOOOOAAAAGOOOOGGGGUUUUUAAAAAAAAA" The second one says: " Go home steve, your drunk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('August 6, 1945 Hiroshima The day Rice Krispies were invented.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was U2''s lawyer''s hourly rate? Nothing, he was pro-Bono', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was reading a book about paint today and I just burst into tears I was overcome by emulsion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did O say to Q? Put that thing away, there are kids here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Betsy DeVos''s school funding plan... You start with $0. But if you sign up 5 kids for school, and those kids sign up 5 more kids, and THOSE kids sign up 5 more kids...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two balloons were flying in the desert... ... and one of them said: "Be careful, there''s a cactusssssssssssssssssssssssss".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a super model with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never date a tennis player Love means nothing to them - Matt Winning, 2015', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Boy Scout and a guy who fixes bicycle horns? One''s motto is ''Be Prepared'', the other''s is ''Beep Repaired'' EDIT:I reached r/all, I promised a friend of mine that I would stop calling his mom hot if I reached all. He sends his regards...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love hyperbole It is literally the best thing ever!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is like the square root of -100... A perfect 10, but completely imaginary', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So Queen of Englad was bored and summoned an American, a frenchman and a russian... They gather at the palace. The queen says: "Bring me your greatest weapon!". And so they went and came back. The frenchman brought a pistol, the american - an assault rifle while the russian is nowhere to be seen. The queen got tired of waiting and said the rest: " now take those weapons and shove them up your arse!" The frechman takes the pistol and shoves it up no problem, didnt feel a thing The american is stuffing the rifle as hard as he can and keeps crying and laughing, crying and laughing The queen asks:" why are you alternating between crying laughing?" The american answers:" I''m crying because this hurts, jesus fucking christ. I''m laughing because the russian is driving over here with a fucking tank" edit: forgot some words', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which hand do you use to stir your coffee? "My right?" "How original, I use a spoon"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you stop a mole from digging? Take his shovel away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Donald Trump''s spirit animal? The wall-rus. Yes, I do hate myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Never mind, it''s an obscure number you probably haven''t even heard of before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My American Car... was Made in Mexico. My Japanese car was Made in America.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Nun and the Uber Driver One night, an Uber driver picked up a nun. While he was driving, the driver started to laugh insanely. "Why are you laughing?" asked the Nun "Oh it''s nothing." said the Uber driver "No really" said the Nun, "I won''t mind" So the driver told her, "Well, it''s really silly but I''ve always had this fantasy of having a blowjob from a nun" "Well then, what''s your name?" the nun enquired. "Robert" "Are you married?" "No" "Are you Catholic?" "Yes" "Then pull into the alley way" The driver was so stunned he didn''t want to give up this chance so he pulled into the alley, when they were finalised they returned to the car. While driving, "Robert" started to cry. "Why are you crying?" asked the nun. "I''m sorry, I lied" "How so?" "Well my name is Daniel. I have a wife and three kids and I''m Jewish." "Well, I''ve done a bit of lying too" the Nun grinned "My name is Simon and I''m going to a costume party"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can only mourn something viewed with my own two eyes... As they say, seeing is bereaving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People think I''m a pervert... People think I''m a pervert because I sleep with a 9 year old. But you have to remember, dog years are 7 times longer than ours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my wife walked into the room while I was having sex with my daughter...... I wasn''t sure what she was more freaked out by, the fact that I was fucking our daughter, or that the abortion clinic gave me the fetus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the ginger bread man walk? Because he had crummy legs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trumps favourite joke. What do sharks and people have in common? The only great ones are white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 1999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two teenagers snuck into a crypt at night. One tripped over a small bone and the other unashamedly laughed. Can''t blame him though, it was a little humerus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frank the Human Cannonball retired yesterday and has yet to be replaced... The circus owner said, "It''s hard to find another man of that caliber."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nintendo, don''t be a Valve Make Luigi''s Mansion 3!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I get paranoid when I smoke Sometimes I get paranoid when I smoke, like last time I got so high I convinced myself my girlfriend was sleeping with my bestfriend. Luckily for me though it was only my second best friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy dies and wakes up on a beach. Nice weather, hot girls playing beach volleyball, barbeques everywhere, laughter and joy. All of a sudden, Satan comes up to him. "Welcome to hell. Enjoy yourself, have a drink, have a hamburger and check out the area. If you need anything or have a question, feel free to ask me." he says. The guy walks along the beach, has a few drinks with a nice girl. He walks over a hill, when he sees a hole in the ground, full with tormented people, flames rising up from the hole. The guy runs towards the beach until he finds Satan. "Hey, I found this hole and all these people are being tormented... Whats that about?" "Oh," Satan says, "thats for the Christians, they want it that way."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I lead a pretty rock n roll lifestyle I wake up stoned and roll out of bed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scientologist lived alone with his dog for company. When his dog died he asked the Scientologist Minister if he would have a funeral service for his dear dog. The Minister replied "we can''t have funeral services for dogs in the church of Scientology, but the baptists might say something for your dog" The man said "thank you Minister, do you think $5,000 would be enough to donate to them for the service?" The Minister replied "Oh dear me, why didn''t you say the dog was a Scientologist"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Theres that moment when you put your steak on the grill and your mouth waters all over from that amazing smell. Do you vegans feel the same when you mow the grass?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pakistani breakup line Boy to Girl: It''s not you, it''s my goat !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A buddy of mine got sent to jail A buddy of mine got sent to jail and completely lost his shit as soon as he got there. 30-seconds in, he punched another guy, that guy went down, and a huge fight broke out. There was a lot of blood, a lot of swearing, and the whole time my buddy was just swinging wildly and shouting absolute nonsense. We don''t play Monopoly together anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ren Descartes walks into a bar.... The bartender asks if he''d like a beer. "I think not." and he promptly vanished from existence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When life hands you lemons.....Make lemonade Then, find someone for whom life has handed them Vodka....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Sanders/Cruz debate was really weird It was like peeking into an alternate dimension where both parties had hindsight', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? One to screw it in. One to excoriate men for creating the need for illumination. One to blame men for inventing such a faulty means of illumination. One to suggest the whole screwing bit to be too rape-like. One to deconstruct the lightbulb itself as being phallic. One to blame men for not changing the bulb. One to blame men for trying to change the bulb instead of letting a woman do it. One to blame men for creating a society that discourages women from changing light bulbs. One to blame men for creating a society where women change too many light bulbs. One to advocate that light bulb changers should have wage parity with electricians. One to alert the media that women are now out-lightbulbing men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old farmer wrote a letter to his innocent son in prison: "This year I''m unable to plant potatoes because I can''t dig the ground. I know if you were here you would''ve helped me." His son replied: "You idiot, don''t dig the ground, I have hidden guns there." Pretty soon, the Police read the letter, and the very next day the ground was dug by the police, and searched for guns but nothing was found. The son wrote again: "Now plant your potatoes dad, its the best I could do from here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the mathematician overweight? Because he ate three squared meals a day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the tallest building in the world? A library, cause it has so many stories', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Phish concerts have the best drugs? Because if you''re not tripping ballsack you''ll realize you paid 45 bucks to listen to cheese eating Vermontians tune their instruments for 6 fucking hours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? STUPID.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn''t much, but the reception was excellent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Robocop say to the criminal he''s fucking to death? "Dead or alive, you''re coming with me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the hardest part when telling a gay joke? Keeping a straight face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw my first coloured movie today One guy was half black and half white and another guy was half white and half black', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Marxists good at hiding? Commieflage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Crazy times. Republicans silenced Elizabeth Warren. Do you know what kind of power that takes? To silence the world''s loudest woman?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The dentist told me I need a crown. I''m like, "I know, right?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A prominent art collector quits the Cabinet immediately after his confirmation He had stumbled into the wrong auction', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING to all in the North Side of Chicago, there is a scam taking place! A scam is being pulled, mainly on older men. What happens is that when you stop for a red light, a young nude woman comes up and pretends to be washing your windshield. While she is doing this, another person opens your back door and steals anything in the car. They are very good at this: They got me 7 times Friday and 5 times Saturday. I wasn''t able to find them on Sunday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I screamed my crushes name while having sex with my girlfriend But she didn''t care ''cause Mercy isn''t our safeword.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a Hells Angel with a Jehovah''s witness? They come to your door and tell you to fuck off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Japanese sake bars and doctors in Oregon? One of them serves adults in Asia...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When do people have unhappy bowel movements? On sad-turd-days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a quarterback discipline his kids? Intentional Grounding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t squirrels mate in the summer? Because they''re storing their nuts for the winter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bin Laden said it was ok to masterbate.... I guess they should have called themselves the Tali-whackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chlorine texts potassium, asking to borrow an electron. Potassium replies, "K"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s 2018. A student insults his teacher, "without us, you wouldn''t have a job!" The teacher looks him in the eye, and says "without your parents'' money, you wouldn''t have a teacher"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''90s kids won''t get this Social security', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky How much do you love your kids?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Republican senator and a prostitute? A prostitute takes your money to fuck you. A Republican senator collects money from someone else and then fucks your children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I posted "In the end, I hope Trump is just a bump in the road and we go on about our business" Was answered "yeah, in that case, the line of cars waiting their turn will stretch to the horizon"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is there no such thing as a drug sniffing dog ? Because the dog will high at training', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Bunny say to the Carrot? I''m going to eat you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Justin Bieber haters, please respect him I owe him my life. Last year August, i had been in a coma for 6 months. Then one day my nurse turned on the radio to his songs. So i woke up and turned it off..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t women fart? They can''t keep their mouths shut long enough to build up any pressure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do guys snore when they sleep on their back Their balls fall over their asshole and the air has nowhere else to go', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My husband almost gave me a heart attack when he said "I like my men like I like my coffee...." "and I fucking hate coffee."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The rancher had 196 cows But when he rounded them up he had 200', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t believe they are still together after all those years of shit Who? My butt cheeks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does anybody know how to get rid of smelly feet? Asking for a foot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbors caught me watching them have sex through their bedroom window and told my parents. My dad made me apologize and told the couple I was normally above that type of behavior. I took the advice and started watching through the skylight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just found a hat with a hundred pound in it!!! The guy playing the guitar was well jealous that he never noticed it first! Chased me all the way down the street.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL Abraham Lincoln is the only president that cannot be convicted of a crime Because he''s innocent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if you miss your mother-in-law? Reload. (Thanks Bob Dylan via Theme Time Radio Hour)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend asked me what my sex life has been like in the past..... I said it was like the Bowling Green Massacre :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Unemployment at its best! An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a frog and a horny toad? Frog said ribbit ribbit. The horny toad said rubbit rubbit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop passes out some joints as part of a drug education program A school police officer passes out 3 joints to the teenagers in the classroom. He tells them that if he doesn''t get them all back, he''s putting the whole school into lock down and searching everyone. When he collects the weed, he only get 2 joints. Before he starts searching everyone, someone comes up with the weed. Another kid looks like he''s about to say something, but puts his hands back in his pockets and looks around nervously.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Spanish people call their young Jewish friends? Amigos Menorahs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Princess Kate and Osama bin Laden have in common? They both had their back doors blown out by a guy in the navy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was woken up at 5am by a crow... It just wouldn''t stop cawing. After an hour I felt like shooting the damned thing! Then another crow joined it and they started to have a jolly old conversation. I wanted to blow both their heads off! One more crow and there definitely would''ve been a murder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson were going camping. They set up their tent, started a campfire, and laid down their sleeping bags inside of the tent. After a few hours of playing cards and joking by the fire, they extinguished the fire and went to sleep. Holmes awoke Watson in the middle of the night and they looked up at the starry night sky. "Watson, look at the sky, what do you see?" "I see thousands of shining stars, and it''s hard to believe how many millions of billions of miles away they are from us." replied Watson. "And what is else can you infer?" said Holmes. "Well, if our sun is just a mere star among trillions, then we can safely assume there are billions of planets out there, and planets like Earth. And then life in the cosmos is a possibility." "Watson, you dumbass, someone stole our tent." Edit: saw this on a tumblr post and couldn''t find it, rewrote it and full credit goes to OP of that post.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog kennel in San Francisco? Luxury apartments', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No means "NO"!..... Unless she''s dyslexic, then **it''s ON!**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man approached Captain Von Trap and said, "No offense, but is that short haired blonde single?" "Nun taken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tough, old cowboy walks into a bar with a gun in his holster... He trips upon entering the bar and his gun fires, with the bullet hitting him in the foot. His big toe is taken off, laying on the floor in a pool of blood. The cowboy limps up to the bar and asks for a shot of whiskey. The bartender stares at him and says, "You just shot yourself in the foot, go to a doctor!" The cowboy looks at him and says, "Give me some whiskey, and quit being lacktoes intolerant!" Edit: spelling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop goes up to the window of a car he''s just pulled over Cop: "Any drugs or alcohol today?" Man: "No but I vape" Cop: "Look pal, I don''t give a shit if you''re gay, just answer the question."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to start an online bakery. But I accidentally deleted all my cookies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just spawned in and instantly died... But isn''t that how abortion works?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What comes after 69? Listerine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross a Rottweiler and a Labrador? A dog that scares the shit out of you then runs away with the toilet roll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna get a pizza and fuck? Guy: Hey, wanna get a pizza and fuck? Girl: No. Guy: What? You don''t like pizza.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Make your Betsy DeVos jokes soon.. While people can still read', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My buddy and I both have the flu. I invited him over for Netflix & chills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should women stop having children after 35? Because 36 is too many', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is driving a Ford truck similar to visiting Thailand? Either way, you''re likely to blow a tranny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you cited something from Reddit... I guess you could call it Creddit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The trampoline used to be called a jumpoline. They changed the name to Tramponline when my Mother in law got one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows are eating grass in a field The first turns to the second and says "Moooooo" The second turns to the first and says "I was just about to say that"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A feminist got mad because I said boys and girls instead of girls and boys I asked what''s it matter, I always cum first', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You snooze, you lose. -Competitive insomniacs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between meeting me in a bar and meeting Bill Cosby in a bar? You''ll remember meeting me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Phone Call I was in the public toilets and had just sat down, a voice from the next cubicle said Hi!, how are you? Embarrassed, I said, Im doing fine. The voice said So what are you up to?. I said, Just doing the same as you, sitting here!. From next door, Can I come over?. Annoyed, I said, rather busy right now. The voice said, Listen, i will have to call you back, theres an idiot next door answering all my questions..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Lebron and a gigolo have in common? They''ve both got a rim-job to do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tobacco companies kill their best customers And condom companies kill their future customers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many people are asking me who I think will win the boxing match between Chris Brown and Soulja Boy, but Chris is the obvious choice as far as I''m concerned. After all I''ve seen his handiwork years ago and it''s not too shabby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend asked me to stop singing Wonderwall I said maybe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young morticians apprentice crashes through the door of his mentors office and says excitedly: "Hey Monty! You gotta check out this lady that just came in." Monty slowly gets up from his chair. "You know Mike, there isn''t much I haven''t seen. A lot of bodies have come through these doors." "Yeah, but have you ever seen a chick with a shrimp in her pussy?" Monty is intrigued. He follows Mike out to the stainless steel table and looks at the cold, naked body of a young woman. The young apprentice points triumphantly at his find. "Mike, you''ll be disappointed to hear that this is not a shrimp, but is actually this woman''s clitoris." Mike furrows his brow and looks first unsure, then embarrassed. "Well jeez Monty, it sure tasted like shrimp."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found the simplest, best way to shave You have to use Occam''s Razor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told the Subway sandwich lady not to forget my pickle. It was a big dill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for Pooh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say that cows kill more people than airplane crashes... It''s true, my ex once chased me with a knife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fight Club is the best bromance movie that never happened!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Trump, did you know Beethoven was deaf? Trump: And how was he able to make all those movies?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a magical dog? Labracadabrador', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9/11 wasn''t an inside job because all the employees jumped outside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Early one morning a son goes up to his dad and asks "What''s the difference between a cunt and a pussy?" Looking a little surprised the dad goes "Come with me and I''ll show you" Takes him into his mothers bedroom where she still sleeps and lifts up the sheets. Dad : you see that, that''s a pussy Son: can I touch it? Dad: fuck no, you''ll wake the cunt up My uncles told me this.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the vulture kicked off of the airplane? Because he ate a passenger''s carrion!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I totally blew it with my new girlfriend That''s how it goes with inflatable partners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a well dressed man on a bike and a badly dressed man on a unicycle? Attire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do penguins do in a race? They peng-win', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Betsy Devos and the Catholic Church have in common? They may help some, but it''s mostly just a bunch of kids getting fucked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was suffering from short term memory loss But then I found my ram.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cannon that can''t fire properly? Projectile Dysfunction. I''ll see myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My math teacher called me average... How mean', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the dyslexic cow say? oom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an encyclopedia and a Republican senator? The encyclopedia has a spine. (Apologies to Senators Collins and Murkowski)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Muslim say to Castro''s gay lover? "Stop, you are Infidel!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you and the universe have in common? You both started with a Big Bang. (I''ve known this joke for a longtime and I don''t remember if I made it)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call interracial Game of Thrones porn? Taking the black', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks up to the pearly gates Saint Peter asks, "How did you get here?" The mans answers, "Flu."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher asks class: "use the word Dandelion in a sentence" Teacher asks class: "use the word Dandelion in a sentence" Jamaican student: "the cheetah is faster dandelion" *Everyone dies*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Bin Laden', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of berry can you drink out of? A strawberry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a heavy trash can that tips things over? A bin Laden.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of ducks quacking at once in a disorderly fashion? Quack-aphony', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Donald Trump blush? He saw the climate changing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad told me to wipe my computer before I sell it. I said, "Why?" He said, "Because there''s cum all over it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to take a Chinese cooking class. But looking into it, it seemed like too much wok.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a brothel... A guy walks into a brothel and says to the madam, "I want the worst sex in the place. If she''s miserable, I want her". The madam asks, "Are you crazy sir"? "No" replies the guy "Just homesick".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Toilet bowls .... should be higher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently I''m allergic to Burt''s Bees body wash Broke out in hives', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This year I got my Valentines Day cards mixed up. My girlfriend thinks I love her and my wife thinks I want to fuck her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many citrus fruits does it take to kill a pirate? None.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a large body of water that''s salty and filled with promiscuous women? The Hoecean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 Vegans arrive on an Arabian shore They debate wether or to pretend they aren''t vegan. The villagers come and welcome them, they offer food and water. The first one says he''s vegan and that he can''t eat meat. The villagers eagerly give him hummus and falafel. They ask the second one if he is vegan as well. He says that it''s fine, he''ll eat anything, expecting to be sharing the meal with his friend. Villagers: Perfect! Happy Eid! Come help us get a goat, you will eat a big meal with us tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the dentist''s accountant get arrested? Incisor''s trading.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Falcons Fans (a bit late but...) Falcons fans be like #Notmysuperbowl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ah, I''ll have get back to you on that one...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the fighter jet go to the doctors office? Because it had ejectile dysfunction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re finally cracking down on Instagram pages that promote white-supremacy... or as I like to call them: gram-crackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said, "When I die, I want everyone at my funeral to be happy, not sad and depressed." I said, "Don''t worry. They will be."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend asked me if I''d ever been in a fight and I told her that I hadn''t. "You''re a pussy," she said. "I once sent a guy to hospital." I said, "We''re talking about fighting, not cooking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is doing something that no one, in the history of democracy, is known to have done before: He''s demanding a recount after he *won* the election.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guys, the book of Revelation is finally coming true, if you don''t belive me, look it up... We''ve heard the final Trump-Pence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Advanced Medical Science Comparison An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my friend I watched The Two Towers and it was fun I''ve never seen him get so angry over a Lord Of The Rings film.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbours love my taste in music. They even call the police to listen it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t Falcons eat cereal? They lost the bowl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s jesus favourite singer Michael bible', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just divorced my wife of six years. It was very amicable. She was the first one to "like" my Facebook status when I indicated I was single again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A midget psychic just escaped from prison... She''s a small medium at large.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Well to be Frank... I would have to change my name.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sign said, "Pay with your phone." Sorry Wendy''s, but I think my iPhone7 is worth a little more than your triple baconator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saved 1.50 today... Today I came home from work, out of breath and sweaty. My wife asked me what happened, to which I replied, "I saved 1.50 today by jogging behind the bus instead of riding it." Instead of looking pleased, my wife looked annoyed. "Bloody moron," she said, "if you had jogged behind a taxi you could have saved 20!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend wanted me to treat her like she was special... ...so I got her a helmet and a box of crayons!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did they call Mozart after he died? A decomposer Baddoom-tish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Optimist vs Pessimist Optimistthe glass is half full Pessimistthe glass is half empty Feministthe glass is being raped', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police officer: "Can you identify yourself, sir?" Driver pulls out his mirror and says: "Yes, it''s me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Around 26 out of 100 people fail at probability theory that''s over 60%', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to Jared But then I saw the prices and decided to buy a ring on amazon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a letter from a feminist? Hate male.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t know why the Samoa Girl Scout cookies are racially insensitive... because I''m white and I have no problem with crackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On my flight to Australia I was asked if I had any criminal records I was confused, because I didn''t know it was still a requirement', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The price of balloons have been plummeting... Specialists say it''s due to inflation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you drop a piano on a minor? A flat minor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an official weapon that shoots pieces of music? A canon canon cannon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Education nominee Betsy DeVos wins Senate confirmation vote I kept seeing this in r/news, but I was sure it belonged here......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seven eight nine. Cinco seis, "Siete! Que haces?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walking home at night comes across a drunk fumbling around under a street light. Man: What''s going on? Drunk: I''m looking for my keys. Man: Did they fall out of your pocket? Drunk: I don''t know but this is where the light is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The difference between men and women... ...is that after being in a relationship for six months a woman wonders if it''s time to say ''I love you'' and a man wonders if it time to fart in bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank coffee before it was cool', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was exposed to a dangerous amount of gamma radiation. It still hertz.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know the german translation for irony? JewWorkingForGasCompany', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The day I cant do my job drunk is the day I hand over my keys today was my last day as a school bus driver', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently got hit by a car in a funeral procession... It still hearse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a far right-wing conservatives favorite candy? Preppermints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton has a smart and beautiful wife Let''s just hope she never meets Hillary', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know, I don''t find the recent super bowl win all that historic... After all, this isn''t the first time Atlanta was burned by the north.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i asked a dyslexic kid if he was Team Santa or Team Satan... (NSFW) he told me to go fuck his mother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sounds of a countryside Teacher in a class after holidays: "Children, who has spent the last holidays at a countryside?" Some pupils says that they have. "What new sounds have you heard in there?" "A cow says MOO" "A cat says MEOW" "The guy next door says GET THE FUCK OFF THE TRACTOR!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the bestselling bodycare product amongst terrorists? Lip bomb', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An interviewer asked me what my biggest weakness was So I replied "Well I''d say my best strength is my listening skills"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In how many parts does the skull divide? It depends on the strength you use to hit it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Caught two friends talking shit about me... Oh,did i say talking?I wanted to say taking and on me while i was sleeping', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did your son like his birthday gifts? -Did your son like his birthday presents? -Oh, he broke every single one of them - the phone, gaming console and even notebook.. -My god! Did he break my gift too?! -Nope, your fucking hammer is fine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife if she wanted to try a new sex position called the 68. I asked if she wanted to try the 68. Wife: What''s a 68? Well it''s when you go down on me, and I''ll owe you one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between Kleenex and the starship Enterprise? They both circle Uranus searching for Clingons', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many of Donald Trump''s Cabinet does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Apparently, they prefer holding meetings in the dark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Chinese food was good But I miss my dog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend asked what to do when the variable and number are next to each other in algebra. I responded "They multiply"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('$1 MILLION IN HEAVEN Joe asked God, "How much is a penny worth in heaven?" God replied, "$1 million." Joe asked, "How long is a minute in heaven?" God said, "One million years." Joe asked for a penny. God said, "Sure, in a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between your mom and my penis? I don''t get turned on when I slam my penis head in a door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the laziest food? Bread. It likes to "loaf" around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man works for a company for nearly a decade without getting promoted He decides that he can either start kissing ass and climb the corporate ladder or he can kill himself. He chose the latter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst thing to happen to a banana gun? It gets Jammed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dorblu A man at a store: "Do you have Dorblu cheese" "What is it Dorblu?" "Oh, it''s a kind of cheese with mold" "Sorry, we haven''t. But we have Dorblu bread and Dorblu sausage"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s Plan... Maybe Trump''s real plan is to make Americans so intolerable that the rest of the world doesn''t want to cross America''s borders.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Michael Jackson and Kmart have in common? They both have boys pants 1/2 off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and the wife were talking about sexy role playing when she asked what I''d like to do. I said "Well, we go to a bar separately and pretend we''ve never met" "Ooh, then what?" she answered I said "Nothing, that''s it".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the travel ban look like at Wal-mart? Well, it''s just a small version of regular sized Ban, both the roll-on and invisible solid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a russian mall cop? Cyka Blart', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the Scandinavian countries communicate during WW2? Norse code', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think it''s about time we start voting for more politicians with breasts I don''t see why not, considering how long we''ve been voting for complete boobs in the first place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there''s a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there''s a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there''s a large limo line at the rental office, but he''s patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there''s no punchline.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve never gone sailing before, but I want to sail around the world one day... I have a yacht to learn before my trip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('European and American at a urinal A European and American go up to a urinal and start peeing. The European turns to the American and says "Heeey.... American!" The American shoots the man a dirty look and says "European..." The other man says "Exactly! How did you know!" The American says "Well, for starters you''re a-peein'' on my leg!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t trip I was testing the floors reflexes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard the Obama''s just got a cleaning bill from the White House... Apparently they left a huge pile of shit in the oval office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an Al-Qaeda base and a Pakistani school? "I don''t know man, I just fly the drone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is this subreddit a vaccum? because all the jokes suck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police stop old man. Ron Chestna 89 years of age was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night . Ron replied, "I''m on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late." The officer asked, "Really? Who''s giving that lecture at this time of night?" Ron replied, "That would be my wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rest In Peace, American Education Coming to an end in DeVos''t way imaginable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been seeing this girl for a while, but I had to drop her Someone stole my pair of binoculars', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many athiests do you need to change a lughtbulb? None. It will be changed by itself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A smart scientist amd a blonde girl sit down on a plane. A very smart man boards a plane and sits down. A blond girl sits next to him. He is bored so he says to her "Let''s play a game, I give you a riddle if you cannot find the answer you pay me 5 dollars. If you answer it though you give me a riddle and I don''t answer it I''ll give you 300$" She says "OK, I''ll go first." "What goes up a hill on 1 leg and goes down on 2?" He thinks about it for a while but after about 10 minutes can''t find a answer so he Google''s it. Nothing. He calls scientists and several well educated people. They have no clue. He, a man of his word gives the 300 dollars to her. He asks for the answer she shrugs and hands him 5$', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar He says ouch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend thinks I''m incapable of being faithful My wife on the other hand... has a pretty hot sister', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superman flies into a bar [OC] Superman flies into a bar and orders a bottle of whiskey and a large glass to go with it. He pours himself two swift drinks and downs it as fast as he could. The bartender says "Hey Superman, you look depressed, what''s up?" Superman replies after pouring and downing himself another drink. "Did you know that the average woman''s pelvis can only take 200 pounds of pressure before being crushed?" "No, I didn''t, why?" Superman shudders. "Me neither."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do with a dead chemist? Ba. For those of you that are having a hard time, Ba is the atomic symbol for Barium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is 10 blocks long and never had sex? The line for the Nintendo Switch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump being elected is proof that we never developed time travel. Today I know why we never developed time travel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife left me because I made too many linkin park references oh well, I guess in the end it doesn''t even matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Know what''s weird about Obama kitesurfing? It means there''s finally something he has in common with Trump: watersports.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a good bar and a woman have in common? Liquor in the front and poker in the back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to work as a corset make for about twenty years But I had to give it up, the work was too constraining.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winter in Poland is like my ex... ...it doesn''t know whether to be cold or hot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m sick and tired of hearing the US doesn''t have Checks and Balances! What do you think the Koch brother''s accountants do?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Home is where your friends are So I''m homeless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asks the doctor "Can I take a bath with diarrhea?" Doctor:"If you could fill the bathtub with it, why not?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you starve in a desert? Because of all the sand which is there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the workplace of a penis dangerous ? Has to work in dark, wet caves, while standing all the time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Harambe''s favorite spice? CAGE-en spice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix a bird, a van, and a dog? A flying carpet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Ba Dum Tshhhh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t stand those stupid people who knock on your door and tell you how you need to be "saved" or you''ll "burn". Stupid firemen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Jesus ripped at his crucifixion? Because he was cross-fit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ordered a dildo online last week Today it finally came.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When it comes to making a simple, quick dinner, YOU CAN''T BEATRICE! Sorry, you can''t beat rice. (by British Comedian Milton Jones)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girls used to call me ugly until they saw my wallet. Now they call me ugly and poor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of programmers: Those who understand binary and those who don''t', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They just got rid of the head of the funfair. That''s unfair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whom did the Boston Strangler choke last? The Atlanta Falcons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m glad that DeVos was confirmed as education secretary. Now I don''t have to worry about my grandkids being able to read some of my dumbest Facebook posts... or anything else, for that matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Original Content I wish I could post this on another sub', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the turtle that became a chef and opened his own restaurant? His specialty is slow cooked meals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many suh-dudes does it take to change a lightbulb? None, it''s already lit fam!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most confusing holiday for black people? Father''s Day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Jazz performer wear one shoe? It gave him sole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is breaking up with me because of my vegan diet... By the way, have I mentioned I''m a vegan?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Boob a Vagina and an Asshole A BOOB, a VAGINA and an ASSHOLE are debating as to who is the greatest of them all BOOB: I give milk to new born babies and I''m attractive to the opposite sex, that''s why I''m the greatest VAGINA: that''s nothing. I give birth to babies and I accommodate the opposite sex, that''s why I''m the greatest . . . . . . . . . Why are you scrolling down? It''s your turn to speak!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought my son a trampoline for his birthday... But all the little shit did was sit in his wheelchair and cry. PS:Not sure if this one has been on here before or not, a friend told it to me and I thought it should go here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the deplorable shoot with his left hand To try and get IN the basket', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My apartment has more than nine ants, but my landlord refuses to get rid of them. He claims they have **ten ants'' rights**.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t see why Obama gave all his speeches behind bulletproof glass.. I know he''s black and all but I doubt he''d actually shoot anyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe dammit, BREATHE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blind dinosaur? Doyouthinkhesaurus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Past, The Present and The Future walked into a bar. It was tense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing, they fast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an American, you know what really grinds my gears? Not having German Engineering', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a mosquito flying over my head and i caught it Then, I took off its wings and I shouted to it "Go Fly!" but it didnt fly. Conclusion: Mosquitoes go deaf when you remove their wings', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do Palestinians go to have fun at night? The Gaza Strip club.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Cop is searching for a criminal babysitter. He says, "I am going to search every little crook and nanny."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These Bowling Green Massacre jokes are too soon Out of respect, we should at least wait until it takes place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ISIS is winning the war By denying US troops visas into territory surrounding the caliphate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would only play one handed in the music assessment But then I''d be in treble', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was waiting in line at this restaurant to order some fruit punch. That''s it. That was the punch-line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s presidency is historic... He''s the first president to ever be more concerned about personal insecurity than he is about national security.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do muslims color with? Qurayons', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in an airport in South Korea recently, and while shopping, asked the cashier which currency he preferred. A bit agitated, he replied... "The Korean Won!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A, C, and E walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don''t serve minors."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You guys hear about the fire at the circus? It was InTENTSe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A photon walks into a hotel with his luggage... The bellhop asks, "sir, do you need help with your bags?" The photon responds, "that''s alright, I''m traveling light!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''Knock knock'' ''Who''s there'' ''Okay Google'' ''Okay Google, who?'' ''Sorry I didn''t catch that'' ''OKAY GOOGLE WHO?'' ''The World Health Organization is a specialized agency of the United Nations that is concerned with international public health. It was established on 7 April 1948, headquartered in Geneva, Switzerland.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Communist sniper? A Marxman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris calls a local hardware store.. Chuck: Do you have a rod? Store guy: Yes. Chuck: Then shove it up your ass. *hangs up The store guy again gets a call from Chuck but the store guy thinks he has got it this time. Chuck: Do you have a rod? Store guy: No. Chuck: Did you shove it up your ass? *hangs up After a while the store guy again gets a call and the store guy thinks to himself "No way he is gonna have me this time". Chuck: Do you have a rod? Store guy: Yes and no. Chuck: Are you repetitively shoving it up your ass? *hangs up The store guy is furious now.He is so furious that this time he calls Chuck. Store guy: Do you have a rod? Chuck: Why? Do you want to shove it up your ass?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many millennials does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Shit''s already mad lit, fam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A concerned husband goes to his priest... "Father, I think my wife is trying to poison me. Every time she makes me something to eat, the rat poison bottle gets lighter and lighter." Troubled by hearing this, the priest tells the man, "I will go and speak with your wife and see what is going on here." The priest then heads to their home and sits down with the wife and has a long discussion. He then comes back to talk to the husband. "I''ve spoken with your wife for over 45 minutes about this", the priest said. The husband looks intently at the priest, "Yeah, what should I do?" The priest calmly says "you should take the poison."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a refugee''s favourite song? Welcome to the Jungle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re going to start letting animals participate in the X Games... They will all have to go through extreme vetting before entering', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the sewer the other day... It was a load of crap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We didn''t elect Harambe for president But we still got a gorilla in office', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People claim that in the English language, y can be a vowel but I think that''s just a myth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Hyaenidae and a butt on weed? The first are hyenas The second is a high-anus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Went to the gym today and cheered everyone on for an hour. On the way out the trainer stopped me... Confused he asked me what I was doing at the gym. So I told him exactly what I was doing: "Lifting Spirits"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the Soviet Union join WW2 until 1941? They were using Stalin-tactics', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit is like cancer Once you''ve noticed it it really grows on you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the funniest software? Lotus Notes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t. Never laugh at your wifes choices& youre one of them &', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the car-loving cowboy say when he meets people? H'' Audi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse walks into the bar... It neigh''s, shits on the floor and walks out, leaving the bar patron''s bewildered', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ubisoft Servers. Thats it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So as I was serving dinner, my wife asked why we were having Brussels Sprouts, "I thought you hated them, having been forced to eat as a child." "I did," I replied, "but I have been trying to do thing I despised as a child to expand my horizons. Surprisingly, I like Lima beans, and I love naps, of course. " "Well I am proud of you! What can I do to help you ''expand your horizons''?" I replied, as nonchalantly as possible, "I am going to need you to fuck my ass".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Request] Tell me your best bird puns! Giving someone a bird themed gift, what are some puns I can use for the card? (It''s not for a birthday, so "happy bird-day" won''t work).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New England Patriots are the Super Bowl World Champions I loved the way they destroyed Germany in semi-finals, and embarrassed Rwanda in the final.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Argon walks into a bar. The bartender says "we don''t serve noble gases here." Argon doesn''t react.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do the light end up? In prism. xD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently saw a video of a girl sitting on various fruit To me, that''s fucking bananas', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Jesus feel after the Romans killed him? How did Jesus feel after the Romans killed him? He felt pretty cross.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was announced yesterday that the 2020 Summer Olympics in Tokyo will make all of its medals from recycled cellphones. Well, theyre going to make the Olympic torch out of a Samsung Galaxy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? A: "You may have graduated but I''ve got so many degrees"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Verbal skills study "A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh." --Conan O''Brien', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dick is like Stan Lee I know he''ll appear, but i don''t know when and when I notice it''s already too late.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a jacket... And he''ll be able to leave the house. Teach a man to jacket, and he''ll never leave the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gave my friend in a wheelchair 3 hits of molly last night He''s still rollin'' this morning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My family and friends always told me I was an ''artistic person''. Finally got a hearing aid and... well... let''s just say that was *not* what they were trying to tell me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife made coffee this morning and I ended up with a piece of coffee bean in my teeth at the weekly department meeting. My lawyer has informed me this qualifies as grounds for divorce.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother told me to stop acting like a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken walk into the light? To get to the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny is on his grandpa''s farm in the rabbit enclosure Johnny is on his grandpa''s farm in the rabbit enclosure. The ground is covered in rabbit droppings. Johnny asks, "What are all of the pellets on the floor grandpa?" His grandpa replies, "Oh those? Those are smart pills. You eat them and you get smarter." Johnny likes the sound of that so he grabs a large handful of them and shoves them into his mouth, "Yuck! Grandpa, these taste like crap." His grandpa replies, "You''re getting smarter already."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Simple mathematics A college math professor and his wife are both 60 years old. One evening the wife comes home and finds a note from her husband that says, "My dear, now that you are 60 years old, there are some things you no longer do for me. I am at the Holiday Inn with my 20-year-old student. Don''t bother waiting up for me." He returns home late that night to find a note from his wife: "You, my dear, are also 60 years old and there are also things I need that you''re not giving me. So I am at the Motel 6 with one of your 20-year-old students. Being a math professor, I''m sure you know that 20 goes into 60 way more than 60 goes into 20. So, don''t you wait up for me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Job Interview: Mental Asylum A newly graduated Psychiatrist goes to an interview at a Mental Asylum.... "So you''re interested in coming to work for us here? Tell me what is your experience with mentally deranged people?" "I''ve been on Reddit for nearly 6 months now" "You''re hired!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife told me that I twist everything she says to my advantage. I take that as a compliment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old School Friend I called an old school friend and asked what he was doing now. He replied that he was currently working on: *Aqua-thermal treatment on ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment* I was impressed...... On further enquiry, I learnt that he was washing dishes, with hot water under his wife''s supervision.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alternative phrases to "Calm your tits" * Soothe Your boobs * De-stress your breasts * Undo the calamity that is your mammaries * adjust your bust before it combusts * Give that chest a rest * Hakuna your tatas * Dont have a rack attack * Bring peace to your bosoms', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was very naive sexually My first boyfriend asked me to do missionary and I buggered off to Africa for six months - Hayley Ellis, 2012', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a revolutionist''s favourite pastry? Coup d''tart', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband & his wife went for Divorce at court. Husband & his wife went for Divorce at court. Judge : U have 3 kids...How will u divide them? He had long discussion with his wife & said " Ok, sir We will come next year with 1 more kid" Joke doesn''t end here.... 9 months later....They got twins', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a vampiric hummingbird''s favourite drink? Necktar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On my way for the latest Porsche presentation.. the airport officials requested the purpose of my flight. I wrote down "I''m here for the newest 911". Best regards from Guantanamo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend asked me not to kill a spider, but said I should take it out instead. I''m getting really sick of her sending these mixed messages.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Pygmalion''s girlfriend break up with him? Because he took her for granite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teddy Bears never feel Hungry Why the Teddy bears never feel hungry? Because they are always stuffed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the hipster burn his mouth? He drank P.B.R. before it was cool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('do you understand your right breast is hanging out of your shirt A blonde was walking down the street. A policeman was walking the opposite way. "Hmmm," he wondered, "It looks as if that lady''s right breast is hanging out of her shirt." As he got closer, he realized it was. He approched her. He said, "Ma''am, do you understand your right breast is hanging out of your shirt?" She replied, "Oh shit. I left the baby on the bus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Red Man There was once a man who absolutely loved the colour red. Everything he owned was red. His house, his walls, his shoes, his fridge, everything. Because of this obsession, he was a huge fan of sunbaking - not the tanning kind, the burning kind. He did love the colour red. Not only this, he always did it in the nude; to become as red as possible, of course. One day as he was sunbaking, a man was hit by a car at an intersection down the road. The moral of the story is to never cross the road when the red man is flashing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the Atlanta Falcons and a white noise machine have in common? They both make artificial fan sounds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife just got back from her OB/GYN appointments. He told her she cannot have sex 6 weeks. I said, "That''s fine but what did your dentist say?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police: Come out with your hands up! Police: Come out with your hands up! Me: I''m gay. Police: So brave...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m going to buy my Dungeon Master a goldfish So I can carp a DM', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No just up to my boobs... Milkman brings milk to blondes door. [old times,1950] notices, note, says please i need 5 gal. today to take a milk bath.in dismay Man rings bell. Blonde in robe opens door,milkman says "5 gal mam ,dont you mean 5qts." She says no gallons, "I''m taking a milk bath today." The milkman asks "Ok how would you like that pasturized?" Woman replies, "No just up to my boobs!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would you find inside a billion year old ice planet on the other side of the universe? One of my wife''s hairs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse in a bar A horse is standing at the bar when a man walks up to him. "Why the long face?" he asked jokingly. "I''m stage four terminal and my wife left me, taking everything with her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Whitney Houston say when asked which parts of public buildings are generally the most affectionate? Hallways love yooooouuuuu.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw my girlfriend shoving a calculator up her vagina. I said, "What the fuck are you doing? You look like you''re in agony." She said, "It''s what''s inside that counts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know today the world is celebrating "Safer Internet Day" If you''re celebrating too, stay away from porn and other internet nasties :D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Chinese people see? Cause they must get ''A''!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes a chicken sneeze? Boog boog boog bogaaa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good, bad, worse Good: I slept with my teacher after prom last night. Bad: I was home schooled. Worse: by my dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One by one, a class of fifth-graders were called on to make sentences with words chosen by their teacher. Nick didn''t often participate in class, so his teacher was glad when she saw him raise his hand to give it a try. "Nick," said the teacher, "make a sentence with the words ''defeat,'' ''defense,'' ''deduct,'' and ''detail.''" Nick thought for a few minutes then smiled. He shouted, "Defeat of deduct went over defense before detail!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dog in heat Her dog was in heat, but she agreed to look after her neighbor''s male dog while the neighbor was on vacation. She had a large house and she believed that she could keep the two dogs apart. However, as she was drifting off to sleep, she heard awful howling sounds. She rushed downstairs and found the dogs locked together and unable to disengage, as frequently happens when dogs mate. Unable to separate them, and perplexed as to what to do next, and although it was very late at night, she called her vet, who answered in a very grumpy voice. After she explained the problem to him, the vet said, "Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs. I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing will make the male lose his erection and he will be able to withdraw." "Do you think that will work?" she asked. "Just worked for me," he replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Metal fans don''t rest in peace, they RUST in peace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why you shouldn''t you buy Russian underpants ? Coz Cher-nob-il fallout !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would people from 1000 years ago say... If you told them in the future you''ll be able to travel and communicate with people around the world near instantly. "You mean across?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian man is driving with his wife and small child. A militia man pulls them over and makes the man take a breathalyzer test. "See," the militia man says, "you''re drunk." The man protests that the breathalyzer must be broken and invites the cop to test his wife. She also registers as drunk. Exasperated, the man invites the cop to test his child. When the child registers drunk as well, the cop shrugs, says, "Yes, perhaps it is broken," and sends them on their way. Out of earshot the man tells his wife, "See, I told you it wouldn''t hurt to give the kid five grams of vodka."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s pink and covered in cobwebs? Maddie McCann''s bike.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried selling drugs once. I tried selling drugs once. The guy asked me for some coke and I paniced and asked him if Pepsi was ok.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Girlfriends asked me why the Body cells go through Meiosis and why her textbook sexualized them. I replied "Sex Cells."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the swine who like children? Pigofiles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Mexican Fozzie Bear say? "Oaxaca, oaxaca, oaxaca!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t you write with a dull pencil? Because it''s pointless. IT''S POINTLESS.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb? Lets go play on our bikes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the T-Rex angry? His arms were too short to sarcastically slow clap this terrible joke...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up and in the cupboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a German, you know what really grinds my gears? Nothing. Our engineering is perfect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Presidential monster Remember guys, Steve Bannon is the President. Trump is the name of his monster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a Jew gets a new phone... Can they use their own number???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I introduced my girlfriend to my family My wife did not like her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know that Frank was an honest person? Whenever anyone tells the truth, they are either Frank or doing it like Frank.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Childhood Nursery Rhyme Old Mother Hubbard, went to her cupboard to fetch her poor dog a bone... But Rover took over, and he bent her over, and gave her a bone of his own', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What public official is most prone to giving their stuff away? A sheriff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('big brother is watching you... and he is bored!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump & the iPhone 7 have in common? They both come with force touch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which one is heavier? A tonne of rocks or a tonne of feathers? The answer? Its a tonne of feathers because you also have to carry the weight of what you did to all those poor birds...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superman is horny Superman is randy as hell he needs to get laid in the worst way. Lois has been holding out and he needs a woman. Superman figures, fuck it, I''m super-sonic. I''ll drop a nut on someone light speed and they''ll never know. So he''s flying around and passes by Wonder Woman''s apartment. Intriguingly enough, she is naked, alone, and writhing in her personal ecstasy. It''s summer, her window is open... Superman can''t resist. At the speed of light, before she''ll know anything, he''s "in and out". Back in the Fortress of Solitude, a somewhat calmer Superman murmurs to himself "A Superman has to do what he needs to." Meanwhile, Wonder Woman rolls of her her couch and exclaims "holy shit, that that was the best ever" The Invisible Man responded "Yeah, but my ass is killing me"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid #1: I wish I had been born 1,000 years ago. Kid #2: Why is that? Kid #1: Just think of all the history that we wouldn''t have to learn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Obama and Mike Pence are playing tennis While playing tennis with Mike Pence, Obama gets angry and every time he misses he screams "God dammit I missed!" This goes on for a while until Mike Pence yells "If you use the lords name in vain one more time a lightning bolt will come from the sky and strike you" They continue playing until Obama misses again, he screams "God dammit I missed!" In that moment a lighting bolt comes from the sky and strikes Mike Pence, he dies on the spot. A couple of seconds later a voice from above the clouds says "God dammit I missed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why would New Zealand starting a war against Australia be historical? It would be the first time New Zealand declared anything against Australia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The KGB, the FBI and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at catching criminals The Secretary General of the UN decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that the rabbit does not exist. The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and make no apologies: the rabbit had it coming. The KGB goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: Okay! Okay! Im a rabbit! Im a rabbit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend just split up with me. She kept crying and saying that I spend too much time on the internet. Jokes on her, there are hundreds of hot singles in my area looking to hook up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you seen any of Stevie Wonder''s music videos? He hasn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you serious No, I''d have to change my name for that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An infectious disease walks into a bar. Barman says, we don''t serve your type here. Infectious disease replies, well, you are not a very good host.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting married before the age of 25 Getting married before the age of 25 sounds a lot like leaving a party before 10 PM to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kids on social media nowadays are so selfish. It''s always meme meme meme.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the hardest question on Timmy''s homework last night? 69d.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What brand of glasses do short-sighted dyslexic nymphomaniacs wear? FCUK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people fall in love with pavements? Because they touch our soles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is just like the rest of us Melania puts his pants on one leg at a time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think people are underestimating the effect of fruit on the human race. I mean come on, people all across the US are rioting because of a fucking orange.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With all the negativity in the world today... ...at least Charlie Sheen is staying positive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was told it was racist to use "welsh" when someone won''t pay a bet. They said to use "renege". So I called them a bunch of renegers instead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dog ran away this morning. I walked around the neighbourhood looking and calling his name for an hour but still couldn''t find him. My wife said I should look harder, so I shaved my head and got a couple of tattoos. Still can''t find the fucking dog....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(An original) I''ll always get in a fight with someone with dwarfism.... We just don''t see eye to eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two nuns, Sr Mary and Sr Patricia, are driving down a dark forest road, late at night... When all of a sudden a vampire jumps out in front of their car. Sr Mary screeches on the brakes and says to Sr Patricia: "Quick! Get out and show it your cross!" Sr Patricia steps out of the car and yells "Oi! Get off the fucking road you stupid cunt!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man has been admitted to hospital after shoving 6 toy horses up his arse. Doctors have described his condition as stable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just ate a frozen apple! Hardcore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a new theory on inertia but it doesnt seem to be gaining momentum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scumbag Steve, when told the babe at the party had Herpes Zoster on her head, asked "Do the shingles match the carpet?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SKY DIVING LESSONS An idiot was taking sky-diving lessons. The instructor explained that it was time for his first jump, and all he had to do was jump from the plane, count to six, and pull the rip cord. A truck would be waiting for him in the field where he would land. The man jumped from the plane when he was told to, and counted to six. When he pulled the rip cord, the parachute wouldn''t open. He tried the reserve chute and that didn''t open. Frustrated, he muttered to himself as he fell, "I''ll bet the damn truck won''t be waiting for me either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the funniest bird alive? A Hahastrich!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Whitney Houston''s favourite type of coordination? HAND EYEEEEEEE', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Banned oranges... It''s 2021 and I went to the supermarket to buy some oranges but couldn''t find any. I went to another one but there were no oranges again... I asked the store manager what''s the matter He said "Trump banned all the Muslims for what some of them did so the new president banned all the oranges for what one of them did".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Batman running out of church? Christian Bale', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do u reanimate a corpse? Abra Cadavera!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do Mexicans cut their pizza? "Little Cea-sars"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump really needs to do something about all these Canadians. Seriously, geese are the worst.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Sovereign Citizen cross the road? ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! AM I BEING DETAINED?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Third times the charm... ...said god before he accidentally created down syndrome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my jeep Topless and easy to get into.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pretty sure I have mites! Cell: "I''m itching all the time and I can''t stop. Pretty sure I have mites!" Doctor: "You are a cell. Individual bodily cells don''t have mites." Cell: "Pretty sure I have mites!" Doctor: "Look, we''ve run the tests. You don''t have mites!" Cell: "Are you sure?" Doctor: "As I explained on your last three visits, what you have is a severe case of mitochondria!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What will be the most profitable career in 2017? Mexican ladder salesman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Scooby Doo''s favorite chocolate? Fe rrer ruh-roh cher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sentence from a schoolboy''s weekly composition class essay - "My cat just had seven kittens. They are all communists". Sentence from same boy''s composition the following week... - "My cat''s seven kittens are all capitalists". Teacher reminds boy that previous week he had said the kittens were communists. "But now they have opened their eyes" replies the child.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So the horse walked into a bar ... and the bartender said, "Say fella, why the long face?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black guy in a library asked me where the colored printer was I replied: "Go use the one in the back you nigger"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many police officers does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just beat the shit outta the room for being black..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I see lovers'' names carved into a tree I don''t think it''s sweet. I just think it''s surprising how many people bring a knife on a date.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What word is used to describe a plant''s range of emotions? Chlorofeels', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Twelve: One to screw it in. One to excoriate men for creating the need for illumination. One to blame men for inventing such a faulty means of illumination. One to suggest the whole screwing bit to be too rape-like. One to deconstruct the lightbulb itself as being phallic. One to blame men for not changing the bulb. One to blame men for trying to change the bulb instead of letting a woman do it. One to blame men for creating a society that discourages women from changing light bulbs. One to blame men for creating a society where women change too many light bulbs. One to advocate that light bulb changers should have wage parity with electricians. One to alert the media that women are now out-lightbulbing men. One to just sit there taking pictures for her blog for photo-evidence that men are unnecessary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it always a good idea to wear ''tall pants''? Because it''s a practice of good high-jean!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you spell DEATH? A-va-da Ke-da-vra!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not okay to just punch a nazi in the face You''re supposed to finish the job', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a small black dot between two larger white ones? A flea with cotton wool in its ears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A flight attendant sees a suspicious couple on board... She decides to report it to the pilot immediately. "Sir, I think we have a case of human trafficking! The female passenger looks pretty frightened and the man she is with looks dangerous!" The pilot responds, "Patricia, I''ve told you before. This is Air Force One..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do crows drink in the morning? CAWWWWWW-FEE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Gf''s ponytail always comes undone when we''re together Oh well, I guess it just comes with the *hairritory*.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just became a fan of Adele She had me at Hello', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when rabbis eat too many carrots? Orange juice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog with seven legs that can''t walk right? Severalpawsy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Melania say to Donald right after sex? Honey, I''ll be home in 30 minutes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four gay guys walk into a bar Bartender says,"Sorry, only one unoccupied stool at the moment." Gay guy says,"That''s completely fine." Gay man proceeds to turn the stool upside down and each of them sits on a leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife recently won the Annual Women''s Golf Meet in our district Needless to say, I have started calling her the "Intercourse Champion of the County "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are OP''s Mom and Velour alike? they both take several days to dry out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re feeling cold, go stand in the corner. It''s 90 degrees there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a horny midget? An extended version of The Hobbit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the otter that begged a beaver to build him a dam? The beaver did not give a barrier that impounds water or underground streams', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love my doctor He told me I only had 3 months to live. I said "thanks for letting me know, doc; but I''m sorry, I don''t know how I''ll be able to pay you." So he got me six more months.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m completely OK with peeing in the shower.. It''s only natural to have a little come out when you''re having a poo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the oven get its TV show green lit? Because the pilot light was out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A giant mushroom attempts to enter a bar... and is stopped by the bouncer. The bouncer says we''ll have none of your sort in here tonight. The mushroom says, "Why not? I''m a fungi!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you an ass man or a tits man? I ass myself that every day. Tits a bit hard to figure out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a russian cow? Mos-cow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mexican magician was at his gig... He said to the audience: "on the count of 3 i will disappear. Uno... Dos..." and he vanished without a Tres', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My local ski resort was ripped off last week for around $900. The robber stole a burger, two beers, and some chips.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Trump was a spy in the Vietnam War, what would his code name be? Agent Orange', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally misidentified my friend''s pet bird It was hawkward.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would tell you all an anus joke.. Butt fuck it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a smart blonde? A Golden Retriever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our anniversary is coming up, so my wife told me that she would be happy as long as I get her something with a lot of diamonds in it. She will love this pack of playing cards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady has 6 of the most desired rings in the world 5 are from the Super Bowl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The problem with Donald Trump is... He never learned harass was one word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t kleptomaniacs get puns? They always take things literally.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I promised my mom I would never get raped I said I would always consent. She said no one would want to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice. Hi I''m Joe and I eat ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Hitler''s philosophy on PR? Weimar your reputation when you know you''re in the Reich!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy who urinates bug spray? Pissed OFF!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Super Bowl 51 will go down as the Gettysburg Address of the NFL Four score and 20 minutes to go.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump like Jesus?? He''ll never be as good as his Daddy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend looked at my pregnant wife and said: "I wonder if it isn''t really hot in there, for the baby" I replied: "It''s likely womb-temperature."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Captain Hook die? He wiped with the wrong hand', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does ''mine shaft'' mean to a German? His Penis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a frisky Optimus Prime called? An autothot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If foreigners are upset to have had their visas cancelled... Why don''t they just apply for MasterCards instead?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Trump''s Cabinet called? The Insane Clown''s Posse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend accused me of cheating I told her she sounded like my wife', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? Wipe his butt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cannibal say when he ate a clown? "That tasted funny."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An inmate at my work threw his food down onto his tray. "Now I know why people turn gay in prison..." "...I''d rather lick another man''s butthole than eat this crap." I died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many Trumpies does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Five. One to write the executive order, one to get it signed, one to announce it to the press, one to provide the alternative facts, and one to call Obama to ask him how. (Edit: Friend told me this joke and I said I would post it for her)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jokes from a high one If Winnie went to the bathroom in the 100 acre woods, what would something be he should NOT take out with him? The Poooooo Or maybe you would cause like you''re in the woods. Where else would it go. No sewage systems..hmm I''ll come back to this one. Has to be something to do with poo tho..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Christian man and his children are talking.. Girl: Dad, I have some bad news. Dad: What? Girl: I''m a lesbian. Dad: Okay. Sister: Dad, I have some bad news too. Dad: What? Sister: I''m a lesbian too. Dad: God, does anyone in this house like boys? Son: I do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do men go for vacation after their bar mitzvah? Jew-bouti', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Call Of Duty players does it take to change a light bulb? Both of them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Listen to this new joke.... 584753', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when a song is cut off before it ends? ...a clefhanger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Paris have trees along Main Street? Because Germans like to walk in the shade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 Englishmen are stranded in a forest... and after days without food they come across a dead deer. Unable to decide on who gets to eat what part, the first says: "Well I go for Manchester, so I''ll have the chest." The second says "I go for Liverpool, so I''ll have the liver." He then turns to the third and says "Enjoy your meal Gunners supporter"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the neutron that was arrested yesterday? He wasn''t charged tho', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two sides of hummus decided to go out to eat Two sides of hummus decided to go out to eat. Once they finished eating, they said, "chickpeas!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An internet meme caught his wife cheating in their bed. "And I say heeey heeey heeey heeey heeey!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You wanna know how to say "Redonkulous" in Spanish? "Redicburro"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump just posted a picture of the protests in Romania.. .. as evidence he had the biggest inauguration crowd ever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two refugees are waiting in line to get into the US... Two refugees are waiting in line to get into the US, one says "screw this line, I''m going to shoot Trump". He leaves for a while and then comes back to resume his place in line. The other guy says "so, did you do it?" He says "no, the line there was even longer than this one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the patient angry at the doctor who wanted his urine sample? He was taking the piss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy walks into a Mexican restaurant but he''s not that hungry... And they serve free tortilla chips. He asks for one chip and they give it to him. He swipes his credit card, and nothing happens. The employee looks at him and says, "Dude... it''s a chip."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between my gf and Roald Dahl Roald Dahl has a Magic Finger', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Captain hook can''t kill 20 kindergarteners. But Sandy Hook can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At what time do drug dealers wake up? At the crack of dawn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My old girlfriend was bad at math That''s Y she''s my X.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Trump supporter''s favorite college? Electoral.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the father buffalo say to his son as his son was leaving? "Please be careful on your way to school. There are hunters out there today and I''m worried." "It''s ok, Dad," his son replied, "I''ll be safe." The son buffalo had just gotten out of sight before the dad heard the gunshots and wept. If only he''d just made him stay home....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Donald Trump like the NFL better than college football? Because it''s Big League', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My African-American friend hooked up with a girl from Thailand... It was a real black-Thai affair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what does a hornet an rain gear have in common? Yellow jacket', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about the Bowling Green Massacre? On 9/3/16 they lost to The Ohio State 77-10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a surrealist painter that converts to Islam? Muhammad Dali', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who are the fastest readers in the world? The people in the World Trade Center, those mother fuckers blew through 110 stories in 5 seconds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken go to the library? To check out a book-book-book!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a stubborn donkey? A badass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the easiest class in a Catholic school? Religion. It has no facts to memorize', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I change my major from law to liberal arts. Psych.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend doesn''t want me to come in her ear My girlfriend said not to cum in my ear because she will go deaf, but I told her that I cum in her mouth all the time and that doesn''t get her to shut the fuck up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t sharks eat more than one dentist at a time? They''re filling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Extreme Vetting and Waterboarding? (Also seeking alternate punch lines) .... the need for rendition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brady once again charged with letting the air out of something. This time it was the Falcons defense', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is a teacher hoping for a snow day, and I told her to brace for Winter Storm Christopher. She said "They don''t close schools in Michigan for 3 inches of white stuff"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the gangster who loved apples? He was a member of the honeycrips', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Talking street A man walks up to a street. The street says to the man: "Hey!" The jumps in surprise as the street shouts at him once more. The man is puzzled. "Excuse me?" The man said. "I''m a talking street! I tell you when a car is coming!" "That''s convenient," The man replied. The road told the man that there where no cars coming. The man crossed the street. The man began crossing back to the side in which he came from. "What are you doing?" Asked the street. "Double-Crossing you!" The man laughed. The man promptly got hit by a semi truck. The Road replied with: "I''m not letting you walk all over me like that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[nsfw] Everybody thinks Tom Brady had the best comeback ever But Kim Kardashian is the cumback queen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Found this joke on a sticky note Person1: Hey person2 I need to get into your Reddit account, what''s the username and password? Person2: Ok, the username is "suck my" Person1: Ok, and the password? Person2: Dick Person1: Passwords too short.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Climate change doesn''t matter if you stay indoors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend is upset because her boyfriend won''t eat out anymore since they got a meal delivery service. She says she''s going to try putting a blue apron sticker on her box and see what happens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(NSFW) I''m a bit like Beer... I also come in pints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The more medical students I met, the less I trust doctors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do young bees get to school? Why, the school buzz, of course!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the weird physicist? He''s a lovely guy but he''s got some strange quarks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time does the library open? The man on the phone asks. "Nine AM," came the reply. "And what''s the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?" "Not until nine AM?" The man said in a disappointed voice. "No not till nine!" The librarian said. "Why do you want to get in before nine?" "Who said I wanted to get in? I want to get out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What word do you never want to call a Black Man that starts with N and ends with r Neighbor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most common phrase uttered by a blond after sex? "Are you guys all on the same team?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should doctors wear surgical masks when pulling the plug on Donald Trump? So no one can see their smiles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can you make a comparison between the Patriots and Lara Croft? Because they both get TomBrady', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just read a post about Queen Elizabeth II, and something struck me as odd... After spending 65 years on the throne, I suppose she''s the most constipated ruler ever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just when defeat seemed inevitable... when all hope was lost and my prayers seemed futile... THE PATRIOTS WON !!! Oh, and something about a big game yesterday? I don''t watch football.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid says to his younger brother: "Look, i found a dildo underneath mom''s pillow." The brother replies: "What''s a pillow?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you start a rave in Ethiopia? You nail a piece of toast to the wall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tired of people complaining about Ukrainian body''s of water that Russia is occupying Crimea river.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the leader of Russia say when someone knocked on the bathroom door? Leave me alone Im Putin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do we evacuate women before the men in an emergency? So we can assess the situation properly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone was handing out certificates for a free Karate Lesson at the mall yesterday He told me I could only Taek Won Do', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots are true gentlemen. They let the Falcons finish their game before they started theirs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THE BIG CRASH It is the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere, two cars both slightly cross over the white line in the centre of the road. They collide and a fair amount of damage is done, miraculously neither driver is hurt. They both get out. One is a doctor, one is a lawyer. The lawyer calls the police on his cell phone and they say they will be there within 20 minutes. Its cold and damp, and both men are shaken up. The lawyer offers the doctor a drink of brandy from his hip flask, the doctor accepts, drinks and hands it back to the lawyer, who then puts it away. Arent you going to have a drink? the doctor says. AFTER the police get here. replies the lawyer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a library and says to the librarian "CAN I GET A BIG MAC FRIES AND A COKE?!!" The librarian says "excuse me miss.....this is a library." The blonde says...."oh im sorry (whispers) can i get a big mac fries and a coke?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a pizza and an art degree? A pizza doesn''t deliver an art degree', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finally took Revenge from my ex... She had it since last two weeks. Gotta return it back to the library.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know there''s an actual name for unexpected sex right? The Spanish Inquisition. Because no one sees it coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are a lot of jokes in the world Most of them are people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t drink anymore. I freeze it now and I eat it like a popsicle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate to be a bad loser A blonde, a red head and a brunette were competing in the Huron River Breast Stroke Championships. The redhead won and the brunette came in second. However, there was no sign of the final contestant. Hours and hours went by causing grave concern and worry. Just as everyone was losing hope, the blonde finally arrived. The crowd was extremely happy and relieved to see her. They embraced the young girl as she came ashore. After all of the excitement died down, she leaned over to the judge and whispered, "I hate to be a bad loser, but I think those other girls used their arms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I couldn''t sleep because woman was knocking on my door at 2 AM last night I tried to go back to sleep but eventually I had to let her out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to an ENT doctor Because his nose was growing at an excessive rate, it was already 11 and a half inches long. Doctor walks in and says, I''m sorry to have to tell you this, but if it keeps it up, by this time next week I won''t be able to see you anymore. I''ll have to give you a referral to a podiatrist, because by next week, it''ll already be a foot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am terrified of elevators, I''m gonna start taking steps to avoid them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe as a society, it is our dictionaries that define us.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a confusing sex dream last night It was a real mindfuck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the church 1,000 years ago and the church today? A thousand years ago Father Roy didn''t get arrested.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to know how I got back from the middle east? I Ran', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I jokingly told my friend I was gay... He''s been fucking me in the ass for 3 months now and hasn''t figured out the truth yet. Haha, I can''t wait to see the look on his face!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roger Goodell must be drunk after last night from... all the boos from the Patriots'' fans during the post game ceremonies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Trump can never finish a book He always gets stuck in chapter 11', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does Matthew Mcconaughey''s Political Ideology come from? The Altright, Altright, Altright', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why won''t Lion win Best Picture? Starving Indian children has always been a naan-issue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my very religious mother for the new iPhone... And she said she''d get me a smartphone, but I had a choice. If I start going to church, I would get the iPhone I wanted. If I didn''t go to church, I would get a crappy low end android. She said it was Yahweh or the Huawei.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('and God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of world... ...then God made the Earth round..and he laughed and laughed. edit: I proof read this so may times... amd -> and', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('U should try the salmon in river styxs Its too die for', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Alabama the best place for sandwiches? Because of their experience working with inbreds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The problem with Bill Clinton Is that he never learned harass was one word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a substance that makes people attracted to both genders? A bi-product!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Australians don''t have sex Australians mate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Cardinal walks into the Pope''s office... ... and he says, "Your Eminence, I have some good news and some bad news." The Pope, of course, is an optimistic fellow, so he says, "I''ll have the good news first." The Cardinal tells him, "It seems that Jesus Christ has returned. He''s on the phone and he wants to speak to you." The Pope, of course, is elated. He says, "There can be no bad news on a day like this, but go ahead: what''s the bad news?" And the Cardinal tells him, "He''s calling from Salt Lake City."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you choke a predatory bird? Give them a 28-3 lead in the Super Bowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where is the safest place to be on a capsizing ship? (Worst joke ever) The Galley! Everything but the kitchen sinks. ^(I warned you)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the father buffalo say to his son as he left for school? Bison.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your breasts looked bigger on your profile... ...which means I won''t feel so bad when you pull my pants down now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Farmer''s Daughter A farmer drove to a neighbors farmhouse and knocked at the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door. "Is your dad or mom home?" said the farmer. "No, they went to town." "How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?" "No, he went with Mom and Dad." The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, mumbling to himself, when the young boy says, "I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give Dad a message." "Well," said the farmer uncomfortably, "No, I really want to talk to your Dad, about your brother Howard getting my daughter Suzy pregnant!". The boy thought for a moment, then says, "Youll have to talk to my Dad about that. I know he charges $50 for the bulls and $15 for the pigs, but I have no idea how much he charges for Howard."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brokeback Mountain was such a nontraditional movie... ... it''s the only one I''ve seen where the good guy gets it in the end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of food just puts you in a bad mood? Feel-awful', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Mexico''s National Animal? The drug mule.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What file format does Gordon Ramsay take photos in? FUCKING RAW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I nearly talked my way out of a speeding fine earlier by telling this Police woman she looked bloody stunning Then I went and fucked it up by saying, ''And that''s not the drink talking either''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks in and notices something different about his wife.... He walks into the house and is pretty sure this time something might be different with his Wife. "The hair!" he thinks... Hmm.. No.... "The dress!" he continues Nup.... "The shoes!" he hazards. No.. No... not sure... Then he realises.... He''s walked into the wrong house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Falcons CHOKE!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the recipe for success for ice cream men? Good Humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the correct way to pronounce nihilism? Doesn''t matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You should always have a pet to make you feel safe... Just the other night my wife woke me tell me heard glass breaking and footsteps downstairs. She calmed down when I told it was probably just the fish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look at all those hot children in that schoolyard! It''s 115F out you sick fucks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between my ex gf and my childhood imagination? Nothing, they both don''t exist anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If life gives you lemons, you make lemonade, But if fife gives you melons... You probably have dyslexia', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Single ones from Reddit: If you have to choose between your dream date and one last concert of Queen? How many hours you will arrive early?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the French call the Germans during WW1? Somme of bitches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to Basic Training with some guy who was issued two left footed boots. He didn''t say anything, and just wore two left boots on his feet. He ended up being medically discharged for foot problems before he graduated. But the guy who was issued two right footed boots on his feet managed to graduate. He was all right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:Name of Melanias new book A:Mein Trump', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ahmad, a Muslim American man, was at the United States border... Ahmad, a Muslim American man, was at the United States border, returning to the USA after a holiday in Canada. He rolled down the window to his car and pulled up to the Border Guard who was waving him forward. "What is the purpose of your visit?" asked the border guard. ''I''m an American. I''m returning home," replied Ahmad. "Are you aware of President Trump''s executive orders regarding Muslims?" asked the border guard. "Yes. But I''m not from one of the seven nations in the order. Also I am an American citizen," replied Ahmad. "What are your thoughts on the order?" asked the border guard. "The United States has the right to protect itself." "And what are your thoughts on President Trump?" asked the board guard. "Well... certainly I feel the same way about him that you do," replied Ahmad. "If that were true, I''d have to arrest you," replied the border guard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Kevin O''Leary was running in a leadership race I''m just not sure if it''s in Canada or the US', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say good things come in threes... Try telling that to someone with Down Syndrome', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a champagne cork back in the bottle? I don''t know, ask a Falcons fan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Invisible Zeppelin? A Hiddenburg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('my wife has sick tits she has breast cancer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] Women have a new form a birth control She''ll fuck a guy real hard and then about half-way through lay on her back and then take it up the ass. It''s called *The Falcon Method*.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Alzheimer''s patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL in 1892 a man was investigated for never having taken a bowel movement in his life. They called him "No shit Sherlock"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do behind your wife''s back? Doggystyle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a man in a wheelchair is having dinner at a restaurant. The waiter comes over and asks: "Would you like a glass of wine"? To this the man replies: "No thanks, I''m driving".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First Harrison Ford got cast as Han Solo... then he got cast as Han Solo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All these Trump jokes... that he''ll never understand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the sex move called the Tom Brady? I''m not sure of the specific mechanics but, you cum from behind FTW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new study has revealed that diarrhea is actually based on heredity They found if runs in your jeans', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m tired of people talking about how strong ants are. I can pick up a leaf too, who cares.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was young, I used to have an obsession with Posh Spice Which cost my mum a fortune in saffron', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning eating my breakfast... Just cereal, i was looking at the missing person part on the milk carton, and i had seen many of these before but some reason this one caught my eye, it read "Lilly, missing 2 weeks blonde hair, blue eyes, always happy". A few days later im sat in my office on the 50th floor and i look out of my window and i see a blue tarp held by duct tape but had fallen down slightly, and inside was a little girl on a matress with her hands tied. I instantly remembered the girl on the milk carton, blonde hair, yes, blue eyes, oh my god yeah, always happy, well she was crying her fucking eyes out, no way that its her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the charges being pressed on the mineral? It was assault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say history repeats itself... But I never expected it to repeat itself so soon, let alone at the superbowl! I haven''t seen a lead blown so bad since Hillary''s 2016 Campaign!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In honor of the Bowling Green Massacre, wear a green ribbon . . . . . . or, perhaps more appropriately, some color you made up in your head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the most productive pants? Participants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to an institute of botanical research the other day, but they only had one type of mushroom It was a shiitake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eating clocks is not that difficult. It''s just very time-consuming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Do You Cut Down A Tree? A sawwwwwwww Dude', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you ever see hippos hiding in trees? Because they''re really good at it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone were dying, except joseph He kept stalin his death', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you explain destiny to a child of divorced parents? Tell them their custody is in their hands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady now has a perfect track record. He''s won 5/7 Superbowls he''s been in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What American State sells small pop cans? Mini-Soda (Minnesota)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the penguin break up with the walrus? Because they were polar opposites.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the people living next door to the tennis factory call the cops? Because they were making a racquet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I will sing of the blessings of the Lord. During the Testimony period in a church service, The 16 year old Pastor''s daughter stood up and said: "Praise the Lord!" Everybody shouted with joy, "Hallelujah!" She continued:"Since the age of 13, I''ve been experiencing serious pain and bleeding every month and it was unbearable. At times it would last 3-5 days. But now, after a series of Bible studies with Brother Solomon in his house, the monthly pain and blood flow have stopped for more than 3 months now. No more pain, no more bleeding. You can even see I''m getting fatter and prettier. And I''m believing God to perfect my healing as we have started to pray seriously about the small problem of vomiting, especially in the morning. Praise the Lord!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Poop is named Poop Because when you say it your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when you poop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stolen car A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling Back and forth. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches, "Can I help you Sir?" "Yessh! Ssssomebody ssstole my carrr", the man replies. The cop asks, "Where was your car the last time you saw it?" "It wasss on the end of thisshh key", the man replies. About that time the cop looks down and sees the man''s wiener hanging out of his fly for all the world to see. He asks the man, "Sir, are you aware that you are exposing yourself?" Momentarily confused, the drunk looks down at his crotch and without missing a beat, blurts out.... "Holy shit! My girlfriend''s gone, too!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golf balls A man got on the bus with both of his front trouser pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde. The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many glances from her, he said, "It''s golf balls." The blonde continued to look at him for a very long time, thinking deeply about what he had said. Finally, unable to contain her curiosity any longer, she asked, "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow..?" :)=(=(=(=(=(=(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just watched an Imam trying to perform a tracheotomy on a Labrador while free-falling at 10,000 feet... ... I''m not sure extreme vetting for Muslims is such a good idea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black guy in a library asked me where the colored printer was I replied, "Dude, it''s 2017, you can use any printer you want."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Uncle Jack got stuck on a roof Would you help your Uncle Jack off?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s no wonder falcons are an endangered species They''ve got an extreme choking problem.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dinosaur Why can''t dinosaurs clap their hands? because they''re dead!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Nancy Sinatra say about her actor friend Christopher''s custom-made footwear? These boots are made for Walken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack - Bro do you know newton''s second law? Jhonny - I am a Science student bro! not a Law student.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a copy of the Kama Sutra to spice things up in the bedroom with my girlfriend... ...unfortunately, it wouldn''t fit inside her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the penguin say when he walked into the bar ouch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an invisible black man? Incog-negro', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scottish, fedora-wearing art professor complimented his Scandinavian student. "Nice skies, Finnish lass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do people who praise WiFi go? The promised LAN.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And God said unto John, "Come forth, and you shall receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to tell an estate agent is lying? Their lips will be moving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s so unfair that people are still judged by the color of their skin. If you want a tattoo, you should be able to get a tattoo and not worry about what people think.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Santa without both his arms?... ***Can''t Applause...***', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats green and smells of pork? Kermit''s fingers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Donald Trump converted to Judaism? He heard that Vladimir Putin likes to drink vodka with orange jews.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear the capital of Sweden really sucks.... But no one can leave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so stupid She tells her kids yo mamma jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Queen Elizabeth has been on the Throne for 65 years That''s one hell of a dodgy curry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the veterinarian who caught laryngitis? He is mostly just a hoarse doctor now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me to take a spider out instead of kill it. We went and had drinks. Cool guy, wants to be a web designer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a plane carrying yesterday''s Superbowl officials called? Jet LI.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Falcons Rise Up every year..... lose every year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots are like a giant dick. Everyone that tries to take them on, ends up choking.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit, I know the cure to cancer [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Atlanta Falcons throw their 28-3 lead in the Super Bowl? They realized that if they won they''d have to visit President Trump in the Whitehouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which vegetable is kind of rad? Radish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today in class we were sayin synonoms.. And my friend said "Donald Trump and Idiot!". My teacher wrote it down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much room is needed for fungi to grow? As mushroom as possible.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear Atlanta is getting a new mascot? Hillary Clinton', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair... Deep down I knew she''d come crawling back to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey! What''s up? A heartwarming animated film about a boy, an old man, and his dog who all fly away to an exotic place in a balloon house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just got over 15 Valentines cards! It left me breathless... The security guard at the Hallmark store gave quite a chase.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To be Frank... I''d have to change my name', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I submitted my DNA for genetic testing and the lab wrote back that I''m related to Donald Trump! I guess that''s what I get for using 24 and me . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump orange? Because he is ripe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We used to live on a very busy main road. But after our 4th child got run over, we decided to move in to a house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If pros and cons were opposites.... Then wouldn''t Congress be the opposite of progress?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Obama get two terms as President? Because every black man gets a longer sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a ginger and a vegetable? One''s brain dead and the other is good for you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have 3 heads, 4 legs, 6 hands and 416 fingers, what am I? A liar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was the most Superbowlly Super Bowl ever *Super Bowl LI', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do hobbit homes with no entrances need? More doors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I prefer guys who make small dick jokes about themselves over those who make big dick jokes about themselves. "Well, I have a medium dick. It can talk to ghosts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my bowels like I like my women... Loose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In breaking news, Trump''s personal library has burned down The fire consumed both books and in a tragic twist he hadn''t even finished coloring the second one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is your favorite rapper? Mine is Bill Cosby, WAIT no I meant favorite RAPER not rapper, my bad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone told me that I''m a narcissist today I told them its everyone else that has a problem', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A chemist auditioned for the play He got a 82 role!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Looking at you is like looking at Chernobyl "Why, because I''m radiantly beautiful?" "No because you''re a fucking disaster."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bet all the Falcon''s fans out there are feeling a bit... deflated. ^[hangs ^head ^in ^shame]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mad scientist is showing off his newest invetion to his henchman "Behold! This wrist-mounted device shows me my exact location and speed within the fourth dimension!" "Looks kinda like a wristwatch to me Boss."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear an unfunny joke? "No" Too late.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Goku has a big chance to... Go coo at a bird.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a large dog that meditates? Aware wolf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had Patriots Sex this morning. That''s where you cum from behind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a monster? Terrier-fied!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You hear about that failed drug dealer? He couldn''t cut it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in a restaurant when... A man asked ''Who knows CPR?'' And I said, ''I know all the letters of the alphabet!'' And we all laughed, And laughed, And laughed, Except one guy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Jeffrey Dahmer move to a larger apartment? He needed more leg room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What isn''t a better love story than Twilight? Donald and Ivanka.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay drive by? A fruit-rollup', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We got 6 inches of snow last night and I''m the only one to show up to work today You''d think these pussies would like 6 inches', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is leaving me because of my mental illness. At least thats what the cat told me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did you call a Mexican snake? Hisssspanic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad doesnt trust anyone, in fact he has a saying about it But he wouldnt tell me Credits: Anthony Jeselnik', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two sewing machines were walking down the road... As they pass by each other one says to the other "Hey are you that Singer?". The other replies "Janome?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What medical condition are elderly bats most afraid of? Incontinence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dancing Latina with a yeast infection? Macarena and cheese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a couch and a black person? Couch can support a family of five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a pigeon explode? Convert it to islam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently breastfeeding hurts Which is sucky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The NFL decides to put on a barnyard show Eli Manning says, "*New York City has the best breakfast egg sandwiches so I''ll play the chicken.*" Aaron Rodgers says, "*Wisconsin has the best cheese so I''ll play the cow.*" Tom Brady says, "*We just won five Super Bowls so I''ll be the GOAT.*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8th anniversary Our 8th anniversary was approaching and my wife pointed out that it was the bronze anniversary. She suggested that we both get something for each other that fit this theme, but not something dumb. She said she''d like me to put a lot of thought into it. I replied, "So you want the brains and the bronze?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Austin Powers: Jimi Hendrix deceased, drugs. Austin Powers: Jimi Hendrix deceased, drugs. Janis Joplin deceased, alcohol. Mama Cass deceased, ham sandwich. Atlanta Falcons, deceased, choked on a 25 point lead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (' I pulled you over today because do you know how fast you were going today, sir? "I definitely was not driving as fast as you, officer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old grumpy lady gets in a bus. She hijacks the speaker and yells : "All of you that sit on the left side of this bus are assholes ! The ones sitting on the right are sons of bitches !!!" A man rise and answers : "Mrs. This is absolutely unacceptable, i''m not an asshole !" "**THEN GET ON THE OTHER SIDE YOU SON OF A BITCH !**"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife in their sixties were coming up on their 40th wedding anniversary. Knowing his wIfe loved antiques, he bought a beautiful old brass oil lamp for her. When she unwrapped it, a genie appeared. He thanked them and gave each of them one wish. The wife wished for an all expenses paid, first class, around the world cruise with her husband. Shazam! Instantly she was presented with tickets for the entire journey, plus expensive side trips, dinners, shopping, etc. The husband, however, wished he had a female companion who was 30 years younger. Shazam! Instantly he turned 93 years old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the Atlanta Falcons locker room to get some change for a dollar... But they only gave me 3 quarters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Scientists Walk Into a Bar The first scientist says "I''ll have some H2O" The second scientist then proceeds to grab a stool from the bar and throw it at his colleague, realising that the first scientist was trying to murder him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If only Jason Pierre Paul played for the Patriots instead of the Giants... He would be the first NFL player to have a ring on every finger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Mexico''s National Animal? The drug mule.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did the king keep his armies? In his sleevies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a dirty bird and a dirty tub? A DIRTY TUB HAS A RING!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old prostitutes are sitting on a porch reminiscing about the good old days... One asks: "Have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?" The other one replies: "No, but I''ve been swung by the tits a few times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone running behind a car gets exhausted Someone running in front of a car gets tired', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you wake Lady Gaga from a Nap? Poker Face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son didn''t take his kleptomania medication this morning. He took mine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God said to Adam "I''m going to make you a woman" God: "She''s going to clean for you, cook anything you want whenever you want it, always look beautiful, never be bad tempered, give you children, always obedient, and she''ll never argue with you." Adam: "That sounds great, but what''ll it cost me?" God: "Oh, an arm and a leg." Adam: "That''s a bit steep. What can I get for a rib?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Atlanta quarterback should become a baseball pitcher... He''s great at throwing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a Super Bowl joke? The Atlanta Falcons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought some shoes from a drug dealer I''m Ng sure what he laced them with but I''ve been tripping all day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Free hoover It''s just collecting dust', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is free Wi-Fi never seen in churches? Because no church wants to be challenged by an invisible power that actually works.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How could anybody be a masochist? Beats me...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English man, Irish man and Scottish man... Are on a plane and the pilot comes out and issues everyone a challange, "if you can guess where we are by sticking your hand out of the window ill give you 50 grand" the Scottish man quickly jumps up and sticks his hand out of the window "we are in Dundee" he guessed, the pilot shakes his head. Then the Irish man trys "we are in Dublin" he guesses, again the pilot shakes his head, then the English man steps up, "we are in Liverpool" he says, shocked the pilot answers "Yes! Thats right, but how did you know?" The English man replies "because my watch has been stolen"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m changing my name to Lead So I have a pretty good chance of someone blowing me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage certificate. WIFE: "Honey, what are you doing?" HUSBAND: "I''m reading our marriage certificate" WIFE: "What for?" HUSBAND: "I''m looking for the expiry date..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl wanted me to maker her scream with two fingers. So I poked her in both eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage counselor. A married couple come to the marriage counselor. The wife complains: "We were having a perfect marriage, until his girlfriend started dating my boyfriend..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Ace Pilot An ace pilot was up in his plane during his down time doing all sorts of tricks. He gets a furious call from his squadron leader on the ground saying "Get that plane back in the hangar NOW!" So, the pilot flies down to the hangar but he doesn''t land. He flies in one side of the hangar, comes out the other, turns around and does it again. The squadron leader calls again and says "I told you to get that plane back in the hangar!" The pilot replies "I had it in there twice! Why didn''t someone shut the door while I was in there?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear the best Irish joke ever? Dry weather.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('His future is not that bright One evening a man comes to a witch so she can predict his future. The witch starts: "Oh dark forces, let me look into the future of this poor man." Then she continues " Oh I can see big Villa with a beautiful garden, naked women, big pool, and I can also see you, my dear." The man, really happy to hear all this, asks. "This is amazing, what am I doing there?" The Witch replies " I can see you gazing at all these through a hole in a fence".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Booze man Little Johny comes to his drunk uncle: -Uncle, you should stop drinking -Ahh Johny, I am too old to stop now. -But, Uncle, it is never too late to stop. -Then I have plenty of time before I stop, my dear Johny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow with Parkinsons? Beef Jerky', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald trump takes The New England Patriots out on his Yacht to celebrate their latest Super Bowl victory. The Yacht sinks and America is great again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anne has a will... Anne Hathaway', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you crucify a spastic? On a swastika.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i''ve got a Liszt of great composer puns that''s Haydn in my closet somewhere... i could look Bach there and read it to you, but i don''t think you could Handel it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between dubstep and any other kind of electronic music? In the middle of a dubstep track, Optimus Prime takes a dump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Cardinal say when he saw the Pope had forgot to flush? Holy shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peety the Dog A man''s best friend, Peety the dog, is old and isn''t feeling well so he takes him to the vet. The vet looks the dog over and tells the man that there''s nothing much they can do for Peety. The man explains how long he and Peety have been together and how much the dog means to him and asks the vet if there''s anything else he can do for the dog. So the vet brings in a cat, who walks around and checks Peety out and finally looks up the vet and just shakes his head, and Peety passes away. A month later the man gets his bill from the vet for $350 and he asks the vet, how come the bill is so much. Whenever you''ve treated Peety before, the bill was only $50. Why was it so much this time. The vet explains that his bill was only $50; the cat scan cost $300.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cholo bitches are arguing over who''s nails are better, and shit is ABOUT TO GO DOWN. To prevent a fight, what kind of test can you administer in this situation to determine who''s nails are actually the most fire? A "lit mas" test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman with no arms or legs.. Is crying on a bench at the beach, i approach her "hey honey, whats the matter?" i say, she looks at me tears streaming down her face "ive never had a man hug me" she says, so i sit next to her and giver a her a nice hug she again looks at me still very upset "i have never been kissed by a man" she says. So i lean in and give her a kiss on the lips, looking a little better than before she finally says "i have never been fucked" so i pick her up and wang her in the sea "now youre fucked"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Since the term "Gay" refers to people who are homosexual I guess that makes them a HOMOsapien', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boyfriend: "I bet you $100 you can''t say something that makes me both happy and sad". Girlfriend: "of all your friends, you have the biggest dick".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been talking to a 13 year old girl for about 2 weeks now We''ve been texting a lot lately and she just told me she''s an undercover cop, that''s quite impressive for her age.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Welcome to Trump''s America where the best black superbowl player is White.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The author of the book "Childish Retorts" died today. RIP Ewan Whosarmy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Difference between twins I''ve fucked a set of twins. People have asked me how hard it was to tell them apart, but it was actually quite easy. You see, Caroline was a redhead with an amazing pair of tits, And frank had a cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make lady Gaga cry? Poker face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally sent a dick pic to everyone in my address book. Not only was it embarrassing, but it also cost me a fortune in stamps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you circumcise a Trump supporter? Kick his secret gay lover in the jaw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you sure you''re the Falcons? And not the *Falcants?*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was addicted to the hokey pokey... But I turned myself around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beer is like the sun Beer is like the Sun. It rises in the yeast, and sets in the waist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is spongebob great at high pressure situations? Because he can soak up the pressure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wise Italian Grandfather An old Italian man in Brooklyn is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside, "Guido, I wan'' you lissina me. I wan'' you to take-a my chrome plated .38 revolver so you will always remember me." "But grandpa, I really don''t like guns. How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?" "You lissina me, boy! Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos. " "Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man. Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, Time''s up!'' "?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Is Undeniably The Most Hated Thing In The Community Garden? A Dick Tator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked her 6th Grade class how many of them were Trump fans... A teacher asked her 6th grade class how many of them were Trump fans. Not really knowing what a Trump fan is, but wanting to be liked by their teacher, all the kids raised their hands except for Little Johnny. The teacher asked Little Johnny why he has decided to be different... again. Little Johnny said, "Because I''m not a Trump fan." The teacher asked, "Why aren''t you a fan of Trump?" Johnny said, "Because I''m a Democrat." The teacher asked him why he''s a Democrat. Little Johnny answered, "Well, my Mom''s a Democrat and my Dad''s a Democrat, so I''m a Democrat." Annoyed by this answer, the teacher asked, "If your mom was a moron and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?" With a big smile, Little Johnny replied, "That would make me a Trump fan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('School is like my baby boy... It hasn''t worked right since I dropped it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The "American Dream" was discussed in class the other day... ... the professor turned to the German foreign exchange student and asked if they had anything like that in Germany to which he responded, "We did, but nobody liked it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the point of Jewish football? Getting the quarter back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overtime is a curse word in retail.* *And the Atlanta Falcons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The last time the Reds had a collapse this big West and East Berlin became united', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I forgot how to throw a boomerang but then it came back to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The patriots may have won the super bowl... But the Falcons won the popular vote', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Falcons return to Atlanta tomorrow Guess the walking dead will be back sooner than we thought', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Andrew Johnson say when he was inaugurated into office after Walt Whitman wrote his poem? I''m the Captain Now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of party did the Donners have? A meat and greet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a rat and a prostitute? One''s a cunning runt, the other is a running cunt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a cold Its snot good.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl is fucking her boyfriend. At her parents house. Her father after being woken by the noises goes upstairs to check it out, and walks in on them. "Dad!" she exclaimed in a panic "...I''m sorry" The dad being a dad replies "hi sorry, I''m Dad!" He then turns to the boyfriend and asks "Are you fucking sorry?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to send her nudes... ...But the file size was too big.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s a urologist''s favorite jazz singer? Urethra Franklin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peter Dinklage should open a BBQ restaurant Called "Pig Me"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I haven''t seen a lead blown this badly since Hilary''s 2016 campaign.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Hillary and the falcons have in common? They both blew it in the last quarter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the ground all white after Custer''s Last Stand? Because the Indians kept coming and coming and coming... **Courtesy of Stephen King''s "The Stand"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the Falcons have in common with Democrats? They both won the popular vote but lost to Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar ...and says "ouch" Someone should move that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man drives over his wife who''s fault is it? The mans, he shouldn''t have been driving in the kitchen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need to pass my exams So I decided to join the Falcons. They pass even when they shouldn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know why Matt Ryan still single He has a choking fetish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New Job Opening! Atlanta Falcons Defensive Coordinator No experience needed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Devil went down to Georgia . . . And obviously reneged on his deal with Falcons fans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think if I saw God strangle Satan right now... ...it would only be the second biggest choke I''ve seen tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who choked harder the Golden State Warriors or the Atlanta Falcons? Hillary Clinton', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dark humor is like food, not everybody gets it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abreva The official sponsor of the Lombardi Trophy procession... and all other major sports trophies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The New England Patriots are perfect. Perfect 5/7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady and I have one thing in common, We are both now overqualified for our jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican triathlon team is already being picked as the favorites for gold in the 2020 Olympics. All of their best runners and swimmers are soon returning home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This day will go down in Falcons history..... The day the Falcons won the popular, but lost the electoral.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got into a fight with my father when I told him Jim Morrison wasn''t talented. He forced me to go to my room. I slammed my door behind me, and my dad said, "Don''t you ever slam The Doors in my house again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Falcons choke on after halftime? Deflated balls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golden State Warriors "No one can choke harder than we did." Atlanta Falcons "Hold my beer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why must you hurry when having sex with your fat fiance on top? It''s a pressing engagement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady needs to improve... He needs to touch-up on his touchdowns.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what Trump and the Patriots have in common? Everyone hates them both, but they both win!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the best way to fuck up anything? Take it to Atlanta.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To save time we should shorten POTUS to POS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Super Bowl Guess the Falcons were seeing how far hard they could throw a game, not a football...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I haven''t seen a team blow a win this bad... Since Hitler invaded Russia', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The last time a group of New Englanders destroyed Atlanta this badly Sherman marched to the sea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Congratulations to Tom Brady, the first player to be undefeated over 5+ Super Bowls. He''s won all 5/7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t let this Superbowl distract you... from the fact that the Warriors blew a 3-1 lead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dady, what is in between mummy''s legs? - A paradise. - And what''s between your''s? - The key. - So you should change the lock, because our neighbour has a passkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Hacker say to his girlfriend? "I''m in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend keeps saying "Cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck in an underground hole full of water" I know he means well...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said that having sex on holiday was the best It certainly wasn''t the best postcard I''ve ever received', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Irish man goes to the builders merchant He picks up a tin of paint and brings it over to the counter. The woman behind the till scans it though and said ''would you like a bag for that.'' He says: ''ah no it''s fine in the tin.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which came first? The chicken or the egg? Chicken, the egg just laid there and took it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sex toy salesman from the US takes a business trip to Canada The border agent asks "are you going to Canada for business or pleasure". The salesman responds with "I''m here for the business of pleasure".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots can still win... By Electoral College votes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God is everywhere. That''s why Morgan Freeman is in every seat of the plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hope Tom and Gisele weren''t planning on having more kids. He''s already firing blanks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get football.... At the beginning of the game, they flip a quarter to see who kicks off first. Then the rest of the game everybody just keeps trying to "get the quarter back". I mean, it''s just a quarter, what''s the big deal!?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The fence and the hurricane There was a hurricane; the aftermath was horrible There was one man who''s only property damage was his fence. So he called the carpenter; and he came over. Man: "how bad is it?" Carpenter: "I salvaged some of it but you''re going to need to buy some new posts; and I''ve got other work to attend to so find someone else to do it" Man: "can you suggest someone?" Carpenter: "I heard /r/jokes is good at reposting"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Rooster So this farmer has a rooster named Fabio. The farmer walks out one day and Fabio is humping a duck The farmer looks over at Fabio and says " Fabio one of these days you are going to screw yourself to death" The next day the farm walks out and sees Fabio humping his goat''s leg " Fabio one of these days you are going to screw yourself to death" On the 3rd day the farmer walks out to find Fabio humping his horses leg " Fabio one of these days you are going to screw yourself to death" Finally on the 4th day the farmer walks out to see vultures circling in the air. Fabio lay there dead. The farmer exclaims " I told you that one of these days you were going to screw yourself to death and now look, you''ve gone an done it" At that point Fabio pops his head up slightly to look at the farmer and says "**SHHHH** they are about to land"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wonder why dogs get mad when you blow in their faces but as soon as you put them in a car they stick their head out the window.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What s the difference between a pizza and a jew The pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an educated tube? and other science jokes! Q: What DO you call an educated tube? A:A graduated cylinder Q:Why did the bear dissolve in water? A:It was polar Q: How did the English major define microtome? A: A small book... Q: Why can`t you trust atoms? A: They make up everything! Q: Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip? A: To get to the same side! Q: Why should you use chromosomes in advertisements? A: Because, you know, sex cells. I...what am I doing with my life? A: Procastination!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots The pats shoulda subbed Bush in, he got more yards on that wheelchair than Blount did all game. #riseup', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you buy a bigger bed... You have more bed room but less bedroom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many black people does it take to start a riot? Negative 1', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots are like the "German Engineering" of NFL teams But even the Germans make mistakes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My granddad always did say that we were too reliant on technology... I replied, "No, you are grandpa." As I unplugged his life support', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1000 degree fidget spinner vs my neck. The result kept my head rolling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop threatened to detain me for impersonating a police officer Apparently, "you can''t arrest me, I''m a police officer!" wasn''t a very good answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once dated a girl who had no pubic hair. She insists she didn''t shave or wax and said she wouldn''t even be able to afford the supplies on her allowance anyways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump goes parachuting... Donald Trump decides that being president is tiring and decides to take a vacation. He decides to go parachuting at a resort in Florida. After the pilot straps Donald Trump''s parachute onto him, the pilot says "3,2,1... and go!" and Donald Trump jumps of the plane. As he enjoys the view below him, he says, "Finally, a joke on /r/jokes where I don''t die!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best kind of fisherman? A master baiter. Lel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say Trump is like Hitler.. except he''s not because Hitler actually had a good healthcare plan...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am looking for a Bank which can perform two things.. give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember to always check you''re grammar. I''m sorry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you listen in on a butt dial... Is it called tapping that ass?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is it just me... or does Tom Brady look really deflated right now?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never knock on Death''s door... Ring the bell and run, he hates that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And then the fight started. A son asked his mother the following question: ''Mom, why are wedding dresses white?'' The mother looks at her son and replies: ''Son, this shows your friends and relatives that your bride is pure.'' The son thanks his Mom and goes off to double-check this with his father. ''Dad why are wedding dresses white?'' The father looks at his son in surprise and says: ''Son, all household appliances come in white..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of cameras do police officers in the USA like? Point and Shoot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I totally forgot the Super Bowl was tonight! Don''t worry; so did the ~~Patriots~~ Falcons. EDIT: Well, this is awkward.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Tom Brady''s favorite sexual activity? Deflatio', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today my brother and i tried some new water It wasn''t bad just basic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No one knows what Lady Gaga is going to do during the Super Bowl... Because you can''t read her poker face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t believe in conspiracy theories I think conspiracy theorists are secretly working together to brainwash us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Watching the super bowl and my wife asks me who I''m cheering for. Wife: "who are you cheering for?" Me: "the Falcons." Wife: "are those the red people?" Me: "they''re called Native Americans now, you racist".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom am I handsome? Son:. Mom, am I handsome? Mother:. I don''t know, ask your girlfriend. Son: But ,I don''t have a girlfriend. Mother: Then you have your answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five Horses Is Her Name A man asked an American Indian what was his wife''s name. He replied, "She is called Five Horses". The man said, "That''s an unusual name for a wife. What does it mean?" The Old Indian answered, "It old Indian name. It mean ..." "NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a box of chocolates.... Empty cause I am fat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In what location are additional entry ways always in demand? Mordor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the largest super bowl of them all? Forty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I''ll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I''ll have an H2O too" He died shortly after.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard this one from my grandpa There is a white kid an asian kid and a black kid playing together on a playground at school all in the second grade. The white kid asks if they want to play a game called whose penis is bigger and they all agree. So the asian kid whips it out, the other kids say "not bad not bad" Next the white kid whips his out, and they all agree that it''s bigger than the asian kids Finally, the black kid whips his out and the other two kids are in awe at how much bigger his is So when the black kid gets home his mother asks him how his day went, and he told her about the game he played with his friends and how he won. So he asked her if it was because he was black. The mom looked at him and said "no, it''s because your thirteen"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What have an Ostrich, a Pelican, and the tax man got in common? They can all stick their bills up their arse. (Credit: Billy Connolly)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do some African-Americans have afros? Because it''s in their hairitage', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mushroom walks into a bar... Bartender says, "We don''t serve mushrooms." Mushroom says, "But I''m a fun guy." Bartender says, "I just said we don''t serve fungi." Mushroom says, "No, no, not ''fungi'', ''fun guy.'' I made a pun." Bartender says, "Get the fuck out of my bar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve seen lots of things on the Super Bowl over the years, like boobs... But this year takes the cake with seeing two bushes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandma just asked me, "Son, what''s your retirement plan?" I said, "It''s you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took my girlfriend to see her first football game... After the game, I asked her what she thought. She said she liked it, but didn''t quite know what all the big to-do was about. Puzzled, I asked her what she meant. She replied: "Well, I keep hearing ''Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!'' It''s only 25 cents, why all the fighting?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you all hear about the sick Chemist? If they don''t Helium or Curium soon they''ll have to Barium', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t like to blow my own trumpet. Which is probably why I got removed from the school orchestra.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard my friend making bird puns and thought... Toucan play at that game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Pepsi delivery drivers who were fired? They tested positive for coke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the trilobite say to his girlfriend while they were eating? "Can I trilobite of your food?" P.S. - my eleven year old sister came up with this', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told myself I would stop drinking But I''m not about to listen to some retard who talks to himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a kind of totally tubular vegetable yesterday... It was a rad-ish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to lose weight while still eating fast food? Buy food from England, you tend to lose a few pounds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When A Teacher Asks You If You Did Your Homework Teacher: Did you do your homework? Student: Did you grade my test? Teacher:I have other students'' tests to grade. Student: I have other teachers'' homework to do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the Buddhist sad when he was asked to send his resume to the company as a word document via email? Attachment leads to suffering.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the New York Times!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a magician cry? You make his family disappear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A turtle is walking across the yard . . . Three snails come up and mug him. Later the cops are asking questions about the mugging: "Can you describe your attackers?" The turtle responds, "I don''t know, it all happened so fast . . ."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy loses an eye on a fishing trip with his friends As he is laying in the hospital bed surrounded by all his family and friends after the surgery, his best friend rushes in the room and says: -I have great news!! I just ran into the doctor and he said you''re not going to lose your eye! Everybody in the room turns around and the wounded man asks -Are you serious?! -Yeah! The doctor said he''s going to put it in a jar with Formaldehyde and you get to keep it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the deaf teacher give his deaf students their homework? He assigned it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have evidence that the mods on r/jokes are censoring posts they dont like! More info in post! [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When robots transform, they turn into cars. But what do cars turn into? Laneways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish i had 2 cars. One delorean and some other car. I would usually drive with the latter, and with delorean only from time to time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You won''t believe what this group of teenage girls did! JK, that was just clique-bait', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say 1 in 10 people live next to a child sex offender Fortunately for me, I live next to two sexy 13 year olds!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what pisses redditors off? [deleted] ... and reposts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that the Energizer Bunny was arrested? It''s ok; he wasn''t charged.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to share everything with you. Man: I want to share everything with you. Woman: Lets start from your bank account.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eventually, all hipsters will age and end up needing canes to help them walk... ...ironically.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: I''ll take a rum and coke Bartender: Is pepsi ok? Man: Yeah, that''ll do. Bartender: *hands him coke and pepsi*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator. DA DUM TSS.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hat for kirk My mum wanted to knit a hat for Captain Kirk of the USS enterprise, but it is quite tricky for someone who has three ears! His left ear, his right ear and his final front-ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The truth needs to be told. I tried to stay out of the conversation, but can''t restrain my feelings any longer. That incredibly arrogant man who cheated his way to victory and now thinks that he can impose his will on the entirety of America. He and his gorgeous foreign-born former model wife. And those angry, bitter people that he represents. No matter how many scandals and lawsuits he gets involved in, he still flaunts his obnoxious smile into our tv screens. A majority of Americans cannot stand you! You may fancy yourself the greatest patriot, but your days in power are numbered! Go away Tom Brady, go away!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: "I''m sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and only have 10 to live" Patient: "What? 10 What? Years? Weeks?!!" Doctor: "Nine"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God was talking to Adam... And told him, "I will make you a wonderful partner. Her name will be Wonderful. She will cook all your meals, wash your clothes, clean up after you, agree with everything you say, and best of all, she will never complain". "That''s great" said Adam. "What will she cost me?" "An arm and a leg" Adam thinks for a minute, then says "What can I get for a rib?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond and a brunette was watching the news Showing was a man standing on top of a tall building yelling that he''s gona jump. The brunette looks at the blond and says "I bet you 200 dollars that guy is gona jump" The blond thinks for a few seconds and takes the bet. A few seconds later the man jumps off the building and just smashes into the car parked at the bottom of the building. The blond fondles in her hand bag and hands over the 200dollars. The next day the Brunette meets up with the blond again and hands her back the money explaining. "I''m sorry, I can''t take your money, I''ve watched that news story the day before. I knew he was going to jump." The blond replied : "No keep the money, I also watched it the day before. I just didn''t think he''d do it again"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arjun the Indian wife-beater punches his wife every night at 7 PM On the dot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most annoying thing about an aging hipster? He fucked your mom before it was popular.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do trans-people go invisible when they have kids? They become trans-parent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time is it when you have $1.25? A quarter past four.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people dont like meatloaf... But if you listen to his songs, 2 out of 3 aint bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl? You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never trust shrimp They''re full of shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you pick up an elephant with one hand? You can''t. Elephants don''t have hands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The chicken was acquitted of murder... ... because there was no evidence of fowl-play.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your family tree must be a cactus. Because everyone on it is a prick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife asks her husband, "what would he do if she died"? Husband: "I would go insane!" Wife: "Would you remarry?" Husband: "I don''t know. You can''t predict what an insane person would do."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#3335 I first heard this one from my brother when I was twelve and it''s been a favorite ever since!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why will all of the referees check their voicemail immediately after the Super Bowl? So they can hear someone say "no missed calls"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wise Chinese monk once said, "If the dog barks... it''s not cooked well enough."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say, have you heard the joke about the pizza without the sauce? Well, it goes like- Nevermind, it''s too cheesy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who speaks 3 languages? Trilingual. What do you call someone who speaks 2 languages? Bilingual. What do you call someone who speaks 1 language? French.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do men like bacon? Because they''re pigs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard this one at my great aunt''s funeral A young boy and his friend are attending mass at the boy''s parish. His friend has never been to a church service before. As they pass through the vestibule the young boy dips his hand into the holy water and makes the sign of the cross. Confused, his friend asks "What''s that mean?" "I''m blessing myself before entering God''s house" replied the young boy. The two children walk down the aisle and stop at the front pew. The young boy genuflects before sitting down. Again, confused, his friend asks "What''s that mean?" "I''m humbling myself before Christ''s Tabernacle" replies the young boy. Soon the pastor arrives and the service begins. After the opening prayers and the readings the priest removes his watch from his wrist, places it upward facing on the pulpit, and begins his sermon. The friend asks "What''s that mean?" "Not a damn thing" the young boy replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Jimmy asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom. "Yes, but you have to recite the alphabet first." "But teacher, it''s an emergency!" "Just tell me the alphabet first and you can go. "A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O Q R S T U V W X Y Z." "Where''s the P?" "It''s all over your MOM''S FACE you retarded bitch! Lol owned"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to Cinderella after the ball? She choked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Mexico''s national sport? Cross country', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the Energizer Bunny sent to jail? Domestic battery', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Steve jobs would have been a better president than Donald Trump. But its a silly comparison really, its like comparing apples to oranges.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who backed into an airplane propeller? Disaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What sound does a 747 make when it lands? Boeing! Boeing! Boeing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a Christian I can''t Believe there are Billy Idol Cover Bands The Bible is very clear that we should not have False Idols', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 mothers are sitting around having coffee and talking about their children. The brunette mom says, "I was going through my daughters room the other day and found a bottle of vodka, I can''t believe my daughter drinks!" The red head mom says, " that''s nothing, I was going through my daughters room the other day and found a bag of Marijuana, I can''t believe my daughter does drugs!" The blonde mom says, "I got that beat. I was going through my daughters room the other day and found a box of condoms, I can''t believe my daughter has a penis!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... and a table... and a chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you take the i out of waiter? A ban from the restaurant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Think Recursion There are two kinds of people in the world, ones who divide the world into two kinds of people and ones who do not.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a deer with no eyes? I have no ideer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever use an expensive toothbrush? It''s breath-taking', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was born without a body... His mother carried him around when she went out. Ever time she walked to the grocery store they would pass the playground. He saw children laughing and playing and he wanted so badly to be able to join them. Every night he wished for a body to go play with the other children. To his surprise one morning he woke up to find that he could stand, and walk and play, his dream came true! He ran down the stairs and flung the door open and bolted down the road toward the playground. Just as he crossed the road his face beaming, oblivious to the oncoming traffic, a bus tried to swerve and miss him but it was to late. The boy was crushed by the bus from the neck down, only his head remained. The moral of the story is that in life it is better to stay ahead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And God said to man, "I will put obediant women on all corners of the world," then laughed as he made the world a ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Help me To whoever has my voodoo doll, please scratch between my butt cheeks. I''m in public. Thanks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Trump keep marrying immigrants? Because no Americans were willing to take the job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Sasquatch in mud? Dirty Hairy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How will Tom Brady feel if the Patriots lose? Deflated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blue films are the most Positive Movies.... No violence , No conspiracy, No Cheating... !! Lots of Love & always a very Happy Ending for all Characters!! Lots of religious reference "oh god, oh my god, oh my god" Good co-operation, Good co-ordination, natural acting, No language problem...And the best part the actor''s as well as audience are satisfied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A psychiatrists secretary walked into his study... And said, "There''s a gentleman in the waiting room asking to see you. Claims he''s invisible." The psychiatrist responded... "Tell him I can''t see him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have a good day When I greeted my boss in the morning, he told me to have a good day. Who am I to argue? So I thanked him and went back home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you kill a clown? Stab it repeatedly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Very Funny beautiful girl was a college student. Once Very Funny Girl comes late to class. Teacher: Why are you late? Very Funny Girl : One boy was following me, sir. Teacher: So, What? Very Funny Girl : That boy was walking very slow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you can a pile of cats? A meowtian of pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife complained that our sex life was boring I replied with "Well honey, if the same thing every three days works for r/jokes, it should be good enough for you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sticky? A brown stick **slaps knee** Wakka wakka wakka!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guys... I don''t think Trump is really our president... He might just be Putin us on!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I decided not to have children... The kids are taking it pretty hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frank and Ollie go to the beach wearing Speedos... FRANK: Hey Ollie, you know why we have these new Speedos, right? OLLIE: No, why? They are tight. FRANK: To pick up cute girls, they like tight swim shorts on guys like us. OLLIE: Great! I like cute girls. FRANK: Here, put this potato in your speedos to pick up the cutest girls. They will go crazy for you when they see that. OLLIE: Got it, let''s split up and meet back here in 30minutes with our cute girls. (30 minutes later) OLLIE: Hey Frank, all the girls where pointing and seemed crazy. But they all ran away. I couldn''t even talk to them. FRANK: Ollie, the potato is supposed to go in the front!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre So the barman gives her one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I scared the postman today by showing up to the door completely naked i scared the postman today by showing up to the door completely naked. im not sure what scared him more, the fact that i was naked, or that i knew where he lived', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To prevent date rape, there''s a new drug for men called Niagra Viagra Rises, Niagra falls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do riot police like to get to work early? To beat the crowd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear walks into a bar... ... goes up to the barman and says "I''d like a gin and tonic .............. and a packet of peanuts". The barman says "Sure, but why the big pause?". The bear holds up his hands and says, "These? Hey, I was born with them".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m curious what my vegetarian friend will bring to the superbowl party tonight. Hopefully it''s an apology.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I could travel back in time, I would go to the Inquisition. I heard the women had nice racks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do gorillas have such big nostrils? Big fingers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar... He sees a sign that reads, "cheese sandwich: $1.50, chicken sandwich: $2.50, hand job: $10." The man beckons to the sexy waitress and says, "are you the one who does the hand jobs?" "Yes," she purrs, "I am." "Well wash your freaking hands," the man says, "I want a cheese sandwich!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t watch the news anymore I just lie to my self and cut out the middle man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m ordering a chicken and an egg from Amazon I''ll let you know', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who do you call when a popcorn gets murdered? The pop coroner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Loving beer and wanting abs is hard So I had to cancel my gym membership due to conflict of interests', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer went into a local bar... ...and ordered a glass of champagne. The woman sitting next to him said, ''How about that? I just ordered champagne too!'' ''What a coincidence'' the farmer said. ''This is a special day for me. I''m celebrating.'' "This is a special day for me too, I am also celebrating," said the woman. ''What a coincidence!'' said the farmer. As they clinked glasses headded: ''What are you celebrating?'' ''My husband and I have been trying to have a child and today my gynecologist told me that I am pregnant!'' ''What a coincidence!'' said the man. ''I''m a chicken farmer and all last year my hens were infertile, but today they are all laying eggs again.'' ''That''s great!'' said the woman, ''How did your chickens become fertile?'' ''I used a different cock,'' he replied. The woman smiled, clinked his glass and said ''What a coincidence!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] Yesterday i was caught masturbating in the shower Bet I never get allowed in to Auschwitz again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ban pre-shredded cheese. Make America grate again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the pharmacy to buy laxatives for his wife. The man asks the pharmacists where the laxatives are so the pharmacist says "To the right, on the bottom shelf, you''ll see a green box that says Dulcolax". The man sees the box and sees a pink box right next to it saying "Woman''s laxative". The pink box was three times cheaper so the man takes the box and asks the pharmacist, what about this? This is not for me, it''s for my wife. The pharmacist replies, in that case you can take that, it''s the same shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw two names carved in a tree... I do not think its cute. On the contrary, its alarming how many people take a knife on a date.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that new, bad pizza joint? Yay, they''re getting critically panned by reviewers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Conjunctivitis.com Thats a site for sore eyes - Tim Vine, 2012', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which college football team keeps people awake at night? The long horns', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of processors do slow PCs use? Potato Chips!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Matthew McConaughey is left handed? Just kidding, he''s alright alright alright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy gets on the bus... A little boy gets on the bus and stops to talk to the driver. "Did you know if my mother was a duck and my father was a duck I''d be a baby duck"? Says the boy. "I don''t care" says the bus driver, "You''re holding up the line". The boy replies "well did you know if my mother was a bear and my father was a bear then I would be a baby bear"? Now angry that the kid has made him late the driver responds "oh yea? Well what would you be if your mother was a whore and your father was drug dealer"? The little boy looks at him and says "If my mother was a whore and my father was drug dealer then that would make me a bus driver"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer wanted to buy a new rooster to breed with his chickens... The farmer''s old rooster was getting up there in the years, so he buys a new one. The old rooster looks at the new rooster and sizes him up. "Look, sonny, I''m willing to hand over the whole henhouse to you, but you gotta prove yourself to be strong and quick. I''m gonna run, and if you can catch me, it''s about time for me to retire." The young rooster thinks it over and agrees to the contest. The old rooster runs fast, but the young rooster runs faster. Just as the young rooster is about to catch up, though -- BANG! The farmer fired a gun, killing the young rooster. "Damn it, I bought another gay rooster!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NASA''s Space Pen When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 degrees Celsius. The Russians used a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Woman Gets On The Bus With Her Baby The bus driver says: "That''s the ugliest baby that I''ve ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I''ll hold your monkey for you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the finest ingredients.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Russian dictators are the best. Theyre the crme de la Kremlin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hothead Pat, upset by how the Super Bowl is going, starts destroying things. Police get on the megaphone trying to evacuate the area: "Go, Pat riots!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a snowflake''s school grade based on? Class precipitation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of dessert makes women gain the most weight? Wedding Cake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just completed a puzzle in 6 months despite it saying 4 - 6 years on the box.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the zeros say after the election? He will not divide us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy jumped through the window. What is the subject? English literature', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best part of a lobster pizza? The **crust**acean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in a cab today and the cab driver said, "I love my job, I''m my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do..." Then I said, "turn Left".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Start typing on a laptop im not used to 4vjenp/ptth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Words of wisdom I''d rather kill myself than to commit suicide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was trying to breastfeed her son in a bus The kid throws a tantrum and refuses to suck on his mother''s breast. So in a fit, the mother tells her son, "If you don''t want this milk, I''m gonna give this to the gentleman beside us." An hour later, the kid still refused to breastfeed. So she tells her son again, "If you won''t breastfeed, I''m really gonna give this to this man beside us!" Then the guy beside them suddenly interrupted, "Please make up your mind now. My stop was 30 minutes ago."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t know the Disneyland had moved to the white house ... Apparently the president is Donald and the vice is Mickey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At what time was Justin Trudeau eaten by a monster? Ate P.M.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We need to stop animal testing our products "But shampoo and makeup companies do it" "We make dildos"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when you are studying bacteria and someone steals your sample? Cultural appropriation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientific opinions differ... on whether climate change deniers have dog or rat shit for brains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While I was on the bus, the person standing next to me played the national anthem While I was sitting on the bus, the person standing next to me played the national anthem, I stood up and he took my seat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('the flat earth society ... ... has members all around the globe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve tried to stop swearing but i cunt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when a girl wants sex and lies about being on her period Getting caught red handed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('US Representatives are like the dislike button on Youtube comments They are supposed to be there to represent your dissent and anger, but never actually do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was sitting in a diner waiting order, when I hear, "Does anyone know CPR?" I said, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed...except one guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know the old saying "Liquor before beer, in the clear; beer before liquor never sicker" As it turns out liquor before liquor before liquor is worse', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Samoan''s offended by the Samoa Girl Scout Cookie? I mean it''s not like white people care about crackers being called crackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love to watch my guests throw up. So I always put the dartboard on the ceiling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superbowl That''s it, that is the joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the joke about Oxygen and Potassium? It was OK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love cats They taste ***just*** like chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked in to a supermarket today and noticed an attractive woman waving at me... She said hello and I was rather taken aback because I couldn''t place where I knew her from. So I asked, "Do you know me?" To which she replied, "I think youre the father of one of my kids." Now. my mind traveled back to the only time I have ever been unfaithful to my wife and I said, "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?" She looks into my eyes and said calmly, "No, Im your sons teacher."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the oxygen say to the magma? I LAVA you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross an insomniac with an atheist and a dyslexic? Someone who stays up all night, wondering if there is a file after death.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn''t hire stupid people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grammar Nazis no longer exist Their called the Alt-Write now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If humans were potatoes what would Donald Trump be called? A dick tater', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump might be the greatest salesman of all time. He sold bullshit to over 60 million people... and they bought it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the word "gay" mean? Asked a boy to his father, to which he replied, "It means happy, son". "Are you happy the Dad?" Asked the boy "No son, I have a wife"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Escaping from the men''s section of the insane asylum, the retard made his way into the women''s block There he noticed a woman with practically no clothes. He took her in his arms. Nine months later, he escaped again and returned to her room. Only this time she had a little moron.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man driving to the store finds no place to park... He sees an empty parking spot and eagerly drives his car into the slot, paying no attention to the "Customer Only" sign. When he comes back, his car has disappeared. He storms into the bank, where he demands to know where his car went. The banker looks straight into his eyes and whispers "I towed you so."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love the way the world rotates It really makes my day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife must have shit herself when i was born! Because she was only twelve days old', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Comanche scout was leading the US Army through the plains The army unit was traveling through hostile territory and needed this Comanche scout that knew the land better than anyone in the area, had the reputation to track anything for miles, and could tell what was headed towards them just from the signs of nature. The scout raised his right hand and halted the expedition suddenly. All eyes were on him as he walked quietly up ahead of the group and went to his knees and slowly placed his ear directly on the ground. He jumped back and turned towards the commander. "Buffalo come" said the Comanche scout in broken English. "By Lincoln''s ghost! How could you tell first there was something coming and second that it''s Buffalo?!" Said the amazed Commander. The Comanche scout raised his hand to his cheek and said "Face Sticky."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Aggies does it take to build a bonfire? It''s like dividing by zero. It can''t be done', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother found her son scooping ice cream in the kitchen and was mad. Mom : "Dinner is going to be ready in an hour, put that ice cream away and go play." Son : "But mom, there''s no one to play with." Mom : "I''ll play with you, what do you wanna play?" Son : "Lets play mommy and daddy, you go upstairs and lay down on the bed." The mom said ok and went upstairs. The son put on his dad''s fishing hat and lit up one of his dad''s cigarettes. He went upstairs and opened the door. Mom : "Now what do I do?" Son : "Get your ass out of bed, you whore, and fix that kid some fucking ice cream."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old couple is sitting in church The wife turns to the husband and says, "I just let out a silent fart. What should I do." "Put new batteries in your hearing aids."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*A man is trying to prove his innocence in court* Defendant: "Please your honour, I don''t have a single bad bone in my body" Prosecutor: "Well according to your medical exam it appears you have osteoporosis" Judge: "Guilty"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wakes up in hospital and exclaims, "Doctor! I... I can''t feel my legs"! Doctor: "Right, that''s because we had to amputate your arms".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar... He sits down to have a pint and notices lumps of meat hanging above the bar. He asks the barman, "What''s with the meat hanging here?" The barman explains... "Well if you can jump up and hit the meat, you get a free drink, but if you miss, you have to buy everyone a round. What do you say?" The man say, "Hmm no, the steaks are too high."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking home late at night along a dark street. There was a young woman walking a few steps in front of me. She crossed over to the other side of the road; I crossed over too. She quickened her pace a little; I quickened my pace too. She broke into a run; I broke into a run too. She panicked and began to scream and run hell-for-leather; I panicked and began to scream and run hell-for-leather too. Whatever it was, I was damned if it was going to catch me first. P.S. It''s an old one, but I doubt the original used semi-colons, so give me that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said that I don''t listen... ...or it was something like that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the console gamer die in the art gallary? There was too many frames.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So i was at this bar And the bar tender yelled "Does anyone know CPR!?" I yelled back "Yeah I do, and I know the rest of the alphabet too!" Everybody in the bar laughed....Except one guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy dies and goes to hell, Satan say''s he can choose his punishment, However there is one rule, once you pass on a pushiment, you cannot go back, you must move onto the next one, so the cowboy agree''s and satan takes him to the first room, it is a bunch of men standing on their heads, the cowboy takes a look and says "naw ill pass on this one". so they go to the next one, and its a bunch of people again standing on their heads however this time on hard concerete. once again the cowboy passes, in the third room, he sees a bunch of people standing knee deep in cow shit, smoking and drinking, the cowboy takes a look and says "well hell i lived most of my live smoking and drinking in cow shit, ill take this one. So the cowboy stands around for about a half hour smoking and drinking when satan walks back into the room and says "all right boys breaks over **EVERYBODY** back on your heads!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a black man why don''t I like cops? Beats me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the foreskin that accidentally walked into the Shul? [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish I got laid as much... ... as I get screwed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 2999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the General say to the Sultan when they lost the battle? "Sir, we''re Otto-men!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man saw a post on Facebook. The post said- hamburger + fries = 5 fries + slushie= 7 slushie + chicken nuggets = 11 How much does a slushie, chicken nuggets, fries and a hamburger cost? The man was incredibly stupid so he dawned on the question for hours and hours. While he was thinking, the answer just dawned on him. He scrolled down to the comment section and typed in one word. "Diabetes"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you have one of the rare $1million pennies in circulation? You don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this... ''Looking for man with these qualifications; won''t beat me up; or run away from me and is great in bed.'' She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at her door one day. The man she met said, "Hi, I''m Bob. I have no arms so I won''t beat you up and no legs so I won''t run away." So the lady says, "What makes you think you are great in bed?" Bob replies, "I rang the door bell didn''t I?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I started teaching Maths to midgets in my area. I''m making little things count.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three words to ruin a man''s ego...? Is it in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn''t wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn''t wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have just watched a documentary on marijuana. I think all documentaries should be watched this way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t noses be 12 unches long? Because then it''d be a foot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Was in town last night... I somehow managed to pull this absolute stunner of a lassie. Long story short, turns out she was a lady boy. But I mean, she looked like a woman, spoke like a woman, kissed like a woman... It was only when she drove us back to her place and managed to reverse the car perfectly into the garage that I stopped and thought "wait, hang on a minute!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend wanted me to treat her like a princess. So I gave her to a gorilla for him to throw barrels at me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar for every time someone over 40 told me my generation sucks... I''d have enough money to buy the rights for this joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man stuck in a traffic jam some guy came and knocked on his windows and said "Donald Trump has been kidnapped, the kidnappers ask for 1 billion dollars or they will burn him with gasoline , we''re asking for donation " So the man in the car asked and on average how much does a person donate? so the guy replies "between one gallon and two gallons "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s Albert Einstein, not mine Few things are Infinite, The Universe, Human stupidity and the amount of times you have to tell your Mother you can''t pause an online Game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a man with no balls and a small penis have in common with a joke with a good punchline... They both make you laugh and you don''t see them coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It takes many nails to build a crib... But only one to fill it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After Noah led the animals onto the ark, it started to rain After Noah led the animals onto the ark, two by two, it started to rain for 40 days and 40 nights. After the 15th day, with all the animals cooped up together with no designated toilet area, the ark began to smell. So Noah, being a wise old Noah, decided to set up a designated shitting area at the bow of the ark. He then called the animals in for a meeting. He proceeded to tell them about the newly designated shitting area. After the 20th day there was so much shit gathered at the bow that the ark began to tilt, leaving the stern raised making it near impossible to play pool. So, being a wise old Noah, he once again had a plan. With the help of the big animals such as the elephants and rhino''s he rolled up all the shit into one huge ball and threw it overboard into the ocean.... 325,000 years later Christopher Columbus discovered it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay couple in their 80? Slo-mo sexuals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Canada will take over the world. Then we''ll all be sorry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s most anticipated movie of the year? The Great Wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad has suggested that I register to be an organ donor.... I guess he is a man after my own heart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got arrested for killing a black man. They charged me with impersonating a police officer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Justin Timberlake''s Favorite vacation spot in the Ukraine? Crimea River', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Britain is the best place for foodies. You loose pounds everytime you eat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I sat next to a smoking-hot thai woman on an aeroplane once... I thought to myself.... *"please don''t get an erection, please don''t get an erection...."* And then she did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl, you''re just like breathing... All I ever think about', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I dont usually wear jeans but... i hate jeans with a passion but on this particular night that i had a date all my khakis were dirty, so i had no choice but to slip into a pair of levis i had hanging in the closet. later on that night the subject of hereditary body parts came up between me and the lady, she told me she gets her enormous tits from her mother, and i told her yeah well i have huge dick.... its in the JEANS.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do fish like to smoke? Seaweed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish are swimming Two fish are swimming, One hits a wall and says dam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My ex-girlfriend still loves it when I eat her out of house and home. Is this the usual breakup routine?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Trump''s favorite math operation? Division.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump single? Because he doesn''t want to be with some Juan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Talk is cheap. But AM radio still can''t turn a profit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw two kids fighting on the play ground. As the only adult there I had to step in. They never had a chance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Barrack say when he was all alone? [1/2 OC] Here I am Obama self... Like a crab in Michelle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the young casserole say to his mother when she called him down for dinner? "I can''t Ma, I''m stroganoff!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you a dime? Because no one fucking wants you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fashionable Russian? Spetsnazzy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nerdy pickup line Hey baby, are you a compressed file format, because rar. ^^^^^now ^^^^^where ^^^^^did ^^^^^I ^^^^^put ^^^^^the ^^^^^bleach...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three words I can''t stand *three words, I can''t stand', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend: Would you dump me for someone more like a trophy wife? Me: Honey, I already have someone like that! Girlfriend: Aww, you''re too sweet! Me: Yeah, you should meet her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a condom on an elephant? Take the ''Y'' out of ''easy'' and the ''F'' out of ''Way'' ....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a feminist makes herself a sandwich.. Is she oppressing herself? Bring it on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman is cleaning her daughters room when she stumbles upon her diary. She sees an entry that reads: "I lost my virginitty today" The woman starts crying. "How can this happen? I''ve given her everything. Why did she do this to me? She can''t be serious about this. She''s in 9th grade for gods sake. How does she not know how to spell virginity?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''Waiter,'' said the customer, ''there''s a hair in this honey.'' ''Ah'', replied the waiter, ''it must be from the comb.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever since I''ve installed Adblocker... for some reason all the local singles lost interest in me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever wonder why Jewish girls are so hot? its because the nazis put them in ovens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife came home pissed "I can''t believe what the school board is trying to do! I''ve worked hard to get ahead for 20 years now and they never cease to amaze me how petty they can be!" I asked what was the matter and did they not give her the promotion to run the school. "Yes, I got the promotion. The raise, the parking spot closest to the door. Even an extra week vacation." I''m thinking this sounds great. More money is always good. And an extra week off makes vacation planning so much easier. "So, it sounds like it''s everything you wanted. You''re now head of the school, something you''ve wanted for a long time." "It''s NOT everything. I don''t get the title I wanted. They couldn''t let me have it. They just had to twist the knife. My title is Senior Administrator." she hissed. "Well, that does seem a bit strange. But really, you know what you are. So what does it matter?" "It''s the Principal of the matter!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s it called when an entire store is sick? A staph (staff) infection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Z used to be at the front of the alphabet But as we all know, a threw z.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boss: Take this broom and go sweep the hallways! Employee: But I''m a college graduate! Boss: Great! Then I should only have to explain this just once.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know that the placebos is supposed to help with testing pills and medicines if they actually work... But who''s smart-ass idea was it to try it with Birth Control!?!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 years old: what do you call a cow that does not moo? 5 years old: it is called no moo cow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New Yorkers; don''t go on flight 225B tomorrow *sent from a Galaxy Note 7*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hello, is this the anonymous FBI tip line? "Yes, Dave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say that the best thing to do is something that excites you and scares you at the same time. Time to go fuck a blender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell, she''s holding a hand grenade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a skinny tree? The Real Slim Shady', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the NFL, NBA, and the Catholic Church have in common? They all have a cult following', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walked up to me and said... "I''m a teepee, I''m a wigwam, I''m a teepee, I''m a wigwam!" and I said "Relax man, you''re two tents!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After my wife gave birth I asked my doctor when we could have sex He told me as soon as he''d washed his hands', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You should be as excited about church as about the Superbowl. So when your pastor makes a point this Sunday, dump gatorade all over his head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t dinosaurs clap their hands? Because they are dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can never calculate the derivative of a curve. Every time I try, I go off on a tangent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dildo you can smoke weed out of? A bong dong.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Difference between Tiger Woods and Princess Diana Tiger Woods has a better driver', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has Donald Trump in common with Pink Floyd? The Wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two surfer dudes are sitting in church One turns to the other and says, "DUDE! Did you know God has a name?" "Dude, NO WAY!!!" "Yahweh!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was diagnosed with Postpartum Depression.. Being sad since I was born.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is brown and sticky? Shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only difference between my dick and a tiny action figure Is that my dick comes without any warning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a feeling Gordon Ramsay likes to wear condoms when he has sex Because he doesn''t like it raw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college teacher noticed that his exchange student, Dave, suddenly had started attracting a lot of female attention. So, one day he asked Dave about his secret. Dave replied: "Well, before sex I simply whip out my willy and smack it against the bedside table, like a hammer. It numbs it up and makes me last longer". Later that day, the college teacher gets home to his wife and finds her in the shower - a welcome opportunity for sex. So, he quickly undresses and starts banging his dick against the dresser, just before hearing his wife calling from the shower: "Is that you, Dave?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ellen should give away more stuff Then rename her show Ellen the Generous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald, Melania, and Ivanka are at the game They show up on the kiss cam, so Donald and Ivanka kiss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if your pour hot water down a rabbit hole? Hot-Cross bunnies! =', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife was writing a VD poem My wife was diligently writing something this morning. I asked her what she was writing? She relied that she was composing my Valentines Day poem. I was kinda chocked up then, she asked, "What rhymes with SCUM-BAG?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: Hey dad, tell me a joke! Dad: Pussy. Me: I don''t get it. Dad: I know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shakira Law What''s the difference between Trump and "Shakira Law?" Hips don''t lie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Princess do when she got to the ball? *Makes choking noise*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Deep within a forest, a little turtle began to climb a tree... After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground. The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate and chirped, Dear, I think its time to tell him hes adopted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the dumb cat slip and fall from the roof? Because = 0', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you think the unthinkable? With an ithburg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. When the bartender points it out, the pirate replies "Arrrgh, it''s been driving me nuts all day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guess who retweeted me? Your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom made chicken soup with rice in it... I told her, "I don''t want chicken soup with Ricin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend says he has the body of a Greek god... I had to explain to him that Buddha wasn''t Greek.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('OMG!! I used to be SOOOOOOO popular with the local ladies!!! THen I got ad-blocker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get kicked out of the Boy-scouts? Eating a brownie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Gates Went To A Restaurant And Paid A $2 Tip, The Waiter Remarked: "Your son gave $100, but you''re only giving $2?" Bill Gates: "He''s the son of a billionaire, I''m the son of a farmer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do they call a dildo in Ireland? A Shamcock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Poor old fool Poor Old fool, thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. So he invited the old man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought hed humor the old man and asked, So how many have you caught today? The old man replied, Youre the eighth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I named my new art Peach It looks pretty, but is completely useless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I became a proud dad today. My son is four, but he acted like a whiny bitch for the first three years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the play with all the frogs? It was ribbitting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Gun Company Was Created By Cats Mauser. I''m sorry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my friend why his bike was so fast He said it was made in Kenya I''m sorry I know this makes no sense whatsoever just click the downvote and be done with it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife told me to go and get some pills that help with an erection... You should''ve seen her face when I tossed her some diet pills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t get the question on the exam wrong... I just put down an alternative answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wrote several books about poltergeists. They''re flying off the shelves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What rhymes with orange. No it doesn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nobody believes that I can name the Canadian Prime Minister. It''s Trudeau.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend gave me his epi-pen as he was dying But I can''t get it to sign my name to save my life either', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s an engineer''s best form of birth control? His personality.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Taylor Swift and a stale Pepsi? The stale Pepsi won''t write a song about me after I dump it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Jewish Men are out for a stroll... 2 Jewish men - Abraham and Jacob - are out for a walk and notice a Catholic church with a sign "We pay $100 when you convert to Catholicism!" Abraham says: "I''m going to see what being Catholic is all about". He goes inside the church for 20 minutes, and when he returns, Jacob is waiting for him. "Have you converted?" asks Jacob "Yes, I am now Catholic" says Abraham "And did they pay you the $100?" Abraham replies "What is it with you people and your money?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alzheimer''s isn''t bad at all You get to meet new people every day! :D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I made a political joke up just now... Given the current temperature of the political climate.... Do you think we can all finally agree on climate change?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Michael Jackson''s favorite musical key? F minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar... for everyone who thought I was unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother just messaged me "I love my girlfriend <3". I always knew he liked them young, but that is fucking ridiculous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a chicken staring at a lettuce? Chicken Caesar salad!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do squirrels swim on their backs? To keep their nuts dry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve already got a car, but I want to have a DeLorean as well. I would drive my first car every day, but only drive the DeLorean from time to time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the deaf women getting run over by a train? Neither did she', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I noticed my waitress had a black eye So I ordered very slowly because obviously she doesn''t listen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad I had to take his bike away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The chance an American will be killed by a foreign-born refugee is 1 in 3.64 billion. Trump supporter : So you''re telling me there is still a chance!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my dentist if I can have some of his laughing gas. He said: "sure, knock yourself out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and has four wheels? A turd. I was just shitting you about the wheels.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am all for animal testing. As long as they are animal products. I don''t want my dogs raincoat to be fitted for a human.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We need to revolt against the... outlets. They have all the power!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Link from Legend of Zelda always die? Heart complications.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey girl, do you live in a corn field? Because I''m stalking you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Barbara Walters did a story on gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict... She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands. She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walked behind their husbands, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime and women seemed happy to maintain the old custom. Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, "Why do you still abide by an old custom, that you once tried so desperately to change?" The woman looked Ms. Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said, "Land mines."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my friends younger brother tells me... Him: Do you know what a gun that would shoot pubes sound like? Me: wtf pubes?... I don''t know... Him: Pew... Pew Pew Kids these days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My English teacher said that nothing rhymes with orange. There was a young man who had nothing, Until one day he happened upon an orange. That rhymes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Like My Women Like My fish Battered', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Mom made chicken soup with celery, chicken, carrots, and rice in it. I told her, "I don''t want soup with Ricin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so basic... ...she got a pH of 15.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dreamed I died in an orange sea Was just a FANTA sea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would like to be poor one day. Because being poor everyday it''s hard...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redditors are like pornstars... They''re better when they''re not old, but not too young.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Switzerland is a great country, with amazing views and nice people And their flag is also great, which is a huge plus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I will argue with you about anything. Anything at all. "No you won''t." "Yeah I will"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you pay a British saxophonist? A tenner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do hillbillies and yeast have in common? They''re both in bred', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest, a rabbi and a minister are on an airplane with an interfaith youth group The plane starts to go down, and they find there are only three parachutes. "We''ll take them and jump," says the minister. "But the children," cries the rabbi, "we have to save the children!" The minister snaps, "fuck the children!" The priest glances back at the terrified kids, thinks a moment, and asks, "Do we have time?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the bartender said... "We don''t serve time travellers". A time traveller walked into the bar. Saw this in a comment can''t find it now, thought I share here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican walked into a bar. He was renowned for being a bad drunk, but at the same time, he couldn''t help getting tipsy once in a while. He had five shots, and was already losing it. A woman came and sat beside him before he pushed her off the stool and stabbed her right in the chest because ''this senore is smelling of ginger''. He soon realised what he did, and walked out of the shop. Everybody else in the bar was too scared for their lives to call the police. When he got home, a little less drunk, his wife immediately asked him upon looking at his bloody shirt, ''Again, Jose? I thought we agreed on no more strong alcohols.'' ''I''m so sorry, Julia,'' he replied. ''I had tequila.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between China and Oceania? One spies on its citizens, uses torture, spreads false propaganda, and won''t stop fighting with its neighbors. The other is something Orwell put in a book', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A crossfitter, a vegan, and a trump supporter walk into a bar I only know because they told everyone who was there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We should switch to the hexadecimal number system already. And I have a good reasons why.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no teams named after a dog in the NFL? They would get beaten by Michael Vick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock jokes. Don''t upvote, I just need a good punchline quick. Please help.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Request] Meta-joke/anti-joke through explanation I understand this might be the wrong sub to ask this, but I figured /r/jokes would be able to help me. I''m looking for a specific type of joke or style of comedy that focuses on explaining the joke in a removed and almost satirical manner. The original joke doesn''t even have to be that funny, the focus is the emotionless explanation of it afterward (i.e. why it should be funny from a societal standpoint, how it uses different societal tropes, breaking it down from a psychological perspective, etc.). I feel like it is more common among students or professors commenting on the analytical nature of academia. If someone could point me in the right direction that would be much appreciated!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? **One** Germans are efficient & have no humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an honest capitalist? A small time robber', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel like a man trapped in a horse''s body. It sucks being a centaur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw two women in a passionate conversation. "How on earth did *he* get between *them*?" I overheard one of them say. I said, "I guess the ''t'' and ''m'' made room."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that the mascot of scientology is a horse? Because it''s a colt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waldo is being interviewed by the press at the Super Bowl. Waldo, how much did you pay for your ticket? Did you get a good seat? Where will you be sitting to watch the game? "I''m just here so I won''t get found."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children Fair enough, use an ashtray.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into Walmart She''s wearing very dirty clothes, smells bad and looks like she is in a horrible situation. She has 2 kids who look worse in her shopping cart The store clerk says: Wow, are they twins? Woman: No you idiot, they obviously look 2 years apart. Clerk: Oh, they don''t look alike. I just couldn''t believe you had sex twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moms pussy is so bushy It did 9/11', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend gave me his Epi-Pen while he was dying. I guess he just really wanted me to have it as a last wish...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get down from an elephant? ... You don''t. You get down from a goose!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a fly drops 5 inches A fly flies back and forth over a river repeatedly, dropping five inches each time. A fish sees it and decides it will jump and catch it when it drops. A bear sees the fish and decides it will get the fish when it jumps. A hunter with a cheese sandwich in his pocket sees the bear and waits for it to go for the fish to shoot it. A mouse sees the cheese sandwich and decides to wait for the hunter to shoot so that the sandwich will fall and he can get it. A cat sees the mouse and decides to wait for it to go for the sandwich to jump and catch it. So, the fly drops, the fish jumps, the bear goes for it, the hunter shoots, the sandwich falls, the mouse goes for it, and the cat jumps, but he misses and goes into the water. The moral of the story: when the fly drops five inches, the pussy gets wet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the mathematician say when she squared i? Shit just got real.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor used two fingers during my prostate exam... He said he needed a second opinion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar ... ... and tells the bartender, "*Quick! Give me a shot of whiskey before the trouble starts!*" The bartender pours the drink, patron downs it, looks around, and repeats, "*Quick! Give me another shot before the trouble starts!*". This goes on again and again for 9 more shots. Finally the bartender asks, "*When is the trouble going to start?*" The man says, "*When you find out I don''t have any money.*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sexually ambiguous child just handed me some money. It was a trans-action.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kim Jong Un is like a Penis shaped potato. He''s a little Dick-Tater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Isis bumper sticker I''d rather be heading.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d love to watch 48 Hours But it would be Monday by the time it''s finished and ain''t nobody got time for that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do apes call sunbathing? Orangutanning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went for a job interview today... "Describe yourself in one word." "Indecisive, maybe. I''m not sure."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I have Alzheimer''s, Hey I just met you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got into a car accident just now. My wife and children are dead and I''m not doing too well myself. Luckily, it only hurts when I laugh. HahaHahaahahahaha. Hahahahahaha. Hahahahahahaha.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mother: Son, your teacher told me you''ve been swearing in school Boy: Mom, do you believe everything that fucking bitch says?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton is starting her own Television show. It was going to be called The Biggest Loser but that was taken so she is going with The Biggest Liar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was in college, my roommates would have sex with anything that moved. I never felt the need to limit myself that much.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called what a man goes down on a woman in a bar? A pub.lic display of affection', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a deer with no eyes? No ideer What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no ideer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you become a millionaire with horses? You start as a billionaire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, "get off me you two!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the guy who made an outfit out of super glue? It was hard to pull off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep an idiot worried for a day? I''ll tell you first thing tomorrow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a carabao who can climb a tree? Awesome!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is my step ladder. I never knew my real ladder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Death and My Dad I want to die peacefully and in my sleep like my father did, not screaming in terror like his passengers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to die peacefully in sleep, just like my father. Not screaming in horror like passengers in his bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump Worst joke I ever told.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother was in a car crash but luckily she was okay... WAS okay, she''s dead now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you find Ronald McDonald at a nude beach? He''s got sesame seed buns', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had his credit card stolen... However, he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t you hate it when you think of something funny to post and... you forget to reddit down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a rain of strategy games? A Tropico storm', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my girlfriend if we could have sex tonight. She said she wants to remain a virgin until her wedding night...butt fuck it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People take so much for granted. Like punchlines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Do Lesbians Like Cats So Much? Because a dog is a man''s best friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many planets are there? Guy: How many planets are there? Girl: 8 Guy: Wrong, 7 after I destroy uranus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the clock do after night left him? He was in mourning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Violence is the only option. Unless a mosquito lands on your dick, then it''s a hostage situation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a good carpenter and a 20 years old girl have in common? No wood gets wasted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I write my mistresses'' phone numbers on the rear view mirror. I know my wife would never think to look there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Ex Girlfriend was getting beaten up at a bus stop by 5 guys, so as a human being I had to step in and help.... She didn''t stand a chance against the 6 of us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do the newly rich like to buy Rolex watches? To know when it is time for a new wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar... For every time I disappointed my family, I would have enough to make them proud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People here take so much for granted. If you took away someone''s car, house and clothes, They''d have nothing. But if you did the same to someone from one of the poorest countries, they''d probably still have aids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. President, two brazillian soldiers died in our military strike in Yemen. "Oh my god... Do we have to file for bankruptcy already?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I let a pasta chef borrow my car He returned it all denty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are blonde jokes so short? So men can remember them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best thing about dating a feminist? When you go out for dinner you only have to pay for your half!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus may have been offended Elderly couple in church during Easter mass. Wife turns to husband and says, "I have just done a silent fart, what should I do?" Husband says, "put new batteries in your hearing aid!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anal with my girlfriend makes my whole day But it makes her hole weak', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time Machine **What do we want?** *Time machine!* **When do we want it?** *Doesn''t matter!*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m working on my second Billion dollars. My first billion didn''t work out so I''ve moved on to my second.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I attempted suicide today Won''t ever do that again, I almost killed myself', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many contractors does it take to screw in a light blub? None, it''s a union job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Young Blond Suspects A Affair A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, ''''Shut up...you''re next!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar for every time someone over 40 told me my generation sucks... Then I could afford a house in the economy they ruined.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Obama was from Hawaii Kenya believe it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took my Indian friend to a Persian restaurant He said the pita was second to naan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I come off confident and cocky cause i call my dick life. But really its cause life is short.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('By accident, I wore my son''s shirt to work today. It was a bit tight under the arms. Guess I should have taken his arms out of it before I put it on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the deaf man get his hearing back? His wife slapped a fifth sense into him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of bee gives you immortality? A Zom-bee!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Muslim entering America? Same as every other person, a tourist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a bartender says, "We don''t serve time travelers in here!" A time traveler walks into a bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An eagerly-awaited cook book "Cooking with Herbs" finally released! It''s about thyme.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s it called when you mix champagne with orange juice at breakfast? Alcoholism', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you see the new "American Tail" movie with Donald Trump in it? Fievel goes back to Russia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a scale of 0 to 1, I think I''m two funny!... Well maybe, on a scale of 0 to 1, I''m nought funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police: Where do u live? Police: Where do u live? Me: With my parents. Police: Where do your parents live? Me: With Me. Police: Where do you all live? Me: Together. Police: Where is your house? Me: Next to my neighbors house. Police: Where is your neighbors house? Me: You won''t believe me if I tell you. Police: Tell Me! Me: Next to my house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fell asleep at a house party last night and someone put a teabag in my mouth, I went fucking mental... No one treats me like a mug', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Beyonce is having twins... !RemindMe 18 years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A jew, christian, and muslim all walk into a bar... the muslim explodes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, ''''Shut up...you''re next!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rory Schlein, the Australian speedway racer, was seriously hurt while driving into a closed gate at a racetrack. Right before he hit the gate, he and his crew chief were tossing terrible jokes back and forth over the radio. Rory was talking about people lining up haphazardly to get hit in the face when his crew chief yelled, "That''s not open Schlein!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump''s toupee and a thong have in common They both barely cover an asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my drug dealer sold me a pair of shoes. I don''t know what he laced them with, but I''m tripping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a balloon store. The storekeeper asks, "What can I get for you today?" The man says, "I''m looking for some Patriots themed balloons for my Super Bowl party." The storekeeper looks at him for a second, then says, "Sorry, those are all deflated."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An F5 tornado went through Arkansas last week... It did $150 million worth of improvements.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say sex doesn''t count until you''re two inches in So I''ll be a virgin forever', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Genetic engineering now allows parents to select the eye color of their children. More great work from the University of Josef Mengele.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had an idea for a movie plot. A retired CIA agent searches for his kidnapped daughter in Paris, but it turns out that idea was taken. I had another idea for one where the same agent is kidnapped with his wife in Istanbul, but it turns out that one was taken too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('USSR- United States Snowflakes & Retards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you create a hipster? Give a homeless guy an iPhone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: If you have 52 watermelons in one hand, and 43 apples in the other, you give 7 fruits to your friend, what do you have? Student: A friend', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer ...than the men who mention it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate goes to a doctor... A pirate goes to a doctor, worried that the moles on his back might be cancerous. The doctor inspects them. "It''s ok," he says. "They''re benign." The pirate replies "Check ''em again matey, I think there be at least ten!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 President to Heaven George Bush , Barack Obama & Donald Trump are going for a job interview with God God asks Bush " " What do you believe in ? " Bush answers ga '' '' I believe in the free market , fighting evil at the battle front & the strong American nation ! " God is impressed by Bush & tells him ( " Great , come sit on the chair on my right " Next , God asks Obama , " What do you believe in ? " Obama answers 4 ) " I believe in the power of democracy , helping the poor , world peace , and promoting that men of all colors are no different " God is really impressed by Obama & tells him " Well done , come sit on the chair on my left . Finally , God asks Trump . " What do you believe in ? " .. Trump answers " I believe you ''re sitting on my chair . "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cannibals are eating Carlos Mencia. One of them turns to the other and says, "Hey, didn''t we see this joke yesterday?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife treats me like God, she ignores me until she wants something', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a Trump supporter fit 50,000 books in their living room? In the fireplace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know that Jesus was black Because he was carpenter yet you never heard about him building anything', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do so many blues musicians come from Korea? Theres a lot of Seoul', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the oceans say to eachother? Nothing, they just waved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sits down next to a lady reading a newspaper by the window on a bus... He can''t help himself and has to fart so he does his best to sneak it out. He glances over and she doesn''t seem to notice. Relieved, he decides to attempt light conversation. "Are you done with that newspaper?" he asked. She replied "No, but next tree we pass, I''ll grab you some leaves".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a chemistry teacher pick up girls? "Hey baby, wanna head back to my place and form a covalent bond?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Freudians does it take to change a light bulb? Two One to screw in the lightbulb and 1 to hold the Cock Edit: Father Edit2: Ladder', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between and out law and an in law? Outlaws are wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t t-rex clap their hands? Because they''re all dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An introvert walks into a bar... Then immediately walks out because fuck that shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hooters Hooters is known for two things......boobs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear was taking a dump in the forest when a rabbit hopped by... The bear asked the rabbit, "Does poop stick to your fur?" The rabbit said, "Yes, but it washes out easily enough." So the bear picked him up and wiped his butt with him. Then the rabbit fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey buddy do you want to see the game this Sunday? *Puts on 1997 movie "The Game" by David Fincher*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is waiting for a bus, when he sees a blonde across the street digging a hole... ...and another blonde immediately filling the hole back in with dirt. He watches as they move up the street doing this over and over again. The first blonde digs a hole, and the second one fills the dirt right back in. After a few minutes, he decides to ask them "excuse me, what are you ladies doing?" "We''re working" the first blonde replies. "Just the two of you?" He inquires. "Well" the second blonde chimes in, "there''s usually three of us, but the girl that plants the trees called out sick"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old women on a plane and sitting next to each other Two old women on a plane sitting next to each other one black the other white. Black:What would you do if the plane were to fall out of the sky and crash? White:I would put on my best clothes and all my most expensive looking jewelery Black: what! why? White: because they rescue the rich white women first. What about you? Black: Id strip down naked White: What! why? Black: because they rescue the black box first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When in doubt ... Wife : I doubt my husband has been cheating on me.... I have doubt on one woman we both know.... What to do? Shrink: Take your husband to that woman''s doorstep and see if his wi-fi connects automatically.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bowling Green Massacre jokes are in bad taste Show some respect for the victims!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apple has now turned to medical accessories!! their first product is the Ipatch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Donald Trump and a baby polar bear? It will be a year before the baby polar bear kills its first seal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is walking around the White House lawn after the first snowfall as president... On the south lawn he sees that someone has written "Trump Sucks!" in pee in the snow. Thin-skinned as he is, he''s furious and calls a staff meeting to investigate who did it. After two days, his investigation team tells him that they have good news and bad news. The good news was that they found the culprit and it was Obama. The bad news was that it was in Melania''s handwriting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a girlfriend but.... "But what?" "She''s in another nation" "Which one?" "Imagination"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? Your mom can''t take a joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of pants does a scientist wear? A pair of genes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you wear ''Y'' fronts in Russia? Because Chernobyl fall out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Hold your nuts this is no ordinary blowjob!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yes, Ive lost to my computer at chess... But it turned out to be no match for me at kickboxing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people never eat clocks? Because its really time consuming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son got hold of my autobiography and threw the pages all around the house. I really need to sort my life out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Short gun story A man walked into a crowded bar waving his unholstered pistol and yelled, "I have a colt 45 model 1911 with a seven round magazine plus one in the chamber and I want to know who is sleeping with my wife!" A voice yelled from the back of the bar, "You''re gonna need more ammo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I ever go missing, you should put my picture on beer rather than milk bottles... This way, my friends will find me faster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Trumps America he''s not Aladdin He''s Aladout', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Job interview in a psychiatry... So youre interested in working with us. What is your experience with mentally disturbed people? Ive been on Facebook for 5 years now. Very good, the job is yours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What perches on your computer and says "Pieces of seven, pieces of seven"? A parity error', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friends asked me to impersonate a lion. It was a roaring success.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve spilt paint. It''s a dyer situation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A software engineer walks into a bar. He sits down and sees the bartender yelling at the computer when trying to process a customer''s order. "Why are you yelling at the computer?" the engineer asks. "Nothing is working! The software on the computer is riddled with bugs!" responds the bartender. The engineer takes a look at the computer and notices the software it is running was actually written by himself a few years earlier. Immediately, he gets offended. "Those aren''t bugs!" the engineer yelled. "Those are alternative features!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever pissed in the shower? "Have you ever pissed in the shower?" my girlfriend asked, a little embarrassed I said "I don''t like to admit it but yes.. I have," "That''s Fucking disgusting!!" she exclaimed "well these things happen when you''re talking a shit!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The neighbours kept me up last night because they were having sex into the early hours of the morning. I would have asked my wife to knock on their door, but she was out playing tennis with her friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was gunna write the great American nursing home romance novel... ....but the title "50 Shades of Grey" was already taken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? Ones a Goodyear. The others a great year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Porn is so unrealistic Just took a shower with my girlfriend..... And stood in the corner freezing for 20 minutes handing her different shampoos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between anal and oral sex? Oral sex makes your day. Anal makes your hole weak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb? Six. One Slytherin to break it. One Gryffindor to volunteer to change it. Three Hufflepuffs to hold the ladder to ensure the safety of the Gryffindor student. And one Ravenclaw to point out that they could have just used magic in the first place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks in on her boyfriend cheating on her She pulls out a gun and says: I''m done with you! Boyfriend: Calm down, calm down. We can settle this with words. The blonde puts the gun to her head Boyfriend: What do you think you''re doing? Blonde: Don''t worry, you''re next.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton is getting her own video game. Left 4 Dead: Benghazi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do vegetarians give good head? Because theyre used to eating nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My roommate claims I''m schizophrenic. We''ll show him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many millennials does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it''s already lit, fam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does the National Football League deserve Tax-Exempt Status even though it generated at least $9 billion in revenue last season? Because it is just as real as the other religions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The most attractive part of Amy Schumer is.... Her Gravitational pull.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re a guy applying for a porn agency... Do you send headshots or headshots?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I painted my computer black to make it run faster... but it just stopped working', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When i was 5 i thought the rain was god peeing How silly childish ideas can be...thinking god exists', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a bass player pick up girls? He says "Hi I''m a guitarist"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jose Cuervo is about to come out with a new Diet Tequila.... After the 2nd shot, every girl in the bar will look like they''ve lost 20 lbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Six afraid of Seven Because Seven was a registered Six offender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do one thing everyday that scares you. -Eleanor Roosevelt Today, I will fuck a cactus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Throwing acid is wrong.. .. in some people''s eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? They just beat the room for being black.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long do I have to live? "I am afraid you have a terminal illness, you only have 10 to live," said the doctor. "10 what, days, weeks, months?" "Nine"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would happen if Hungary invaded and conquered Turkey? A new kingdom would be formed known as full.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to be a millionaire just like my dad!! Wow, your dads a millionaire? No, but he always wanted to be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('two mice chewing on a filmrole..one of them goes.." i think the book was better".. two mice chewing on a filmrole..one of them goes.." i think the book was better"..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t get WiFi on my phone Did Tech Support for an ISP Customer: "I can''t get WiFi on my phone" TS : does routine checks, remote login to router, etc.... TS : "All looks OK here. Can''t see your phone connected to the router though I can see a computer and a TV box connected on Wi-Fi. Any errors on the phone?" Customer: "It looks OK. It worked fine yesterday" TS : does a bit more digging - can''t see a problem TS : "can you move closer to the router?" Customer: "I''m in Spain on holidays - the router is back home, would that make a difference?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beyonce has more black people inside her than. Donald trumps cabinet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('they say we learn from our mistakes thats why i am making as many as possible soon i will be a genius.. they say we learn from our mistakes thats why i am making as many as possible soon i will be a genius..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a good joke and a bad joke timing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to start a business selling premium dildos, but I think I can''t compete with Apple selling overpriced stuff for assholes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid... ... She didn''t realize this was a repost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a joke about sodium? Na', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife : I''m leaving you! Wife : I''m leaving you Me : Why?! Wife : You lie to me constantly! Me : Ha! You don''t just leave the man who invented the spatula, Amber!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should you do if your xbox 360 gets the red ring of death? Buy a PS3', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Bartender and the boy A man entered the bar to enjoy a drink when suddenly he saw a small boy enters the bar. The bartender said to the man. "hey, watch this" The man watches as the boy approaches the bartender and the bartender showed something on each hand. On his left was a 1$ bill while the other hand shows a 10$ bill. The boy grabs the 1$ bill and left the bar. The bartender chuckled and says. "you see this kid? This kid never learns! Hes been doing the same thing for three months! What a dumb kid" The man soon finishes his drink, paid and left the bar. Outside the bar he saw the same kid buying an ice cream. He decided to approach and ask the little boy. "hey kid, why did you take the 1$ bill instead of the 10$?" The boy just looks at him and say. "mister, if i take the 10$ bill he wouldnt give me anymore money!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do the T-Rex often have trouble high-fiving? Because they''re dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife what we were having for dinner tonight She said, "well firstly,. Going to boil some potatoes. Then I''m going to cook the chicken in the oven." "Delicious", I said, "what else?". "Then I''m going to roast some vegetables and pour us a nice glass of red wine." Slightly confused, I asked, "That sounds lovely darling. One thing though..." "...I didn''t realise you enjoyed doing that kind of thing?" "What kind of thing dear?" "Well, it seems a bit wrong, for our dinner entertainment, to take the piss out of disabled people..." Badumshhhh Sorry, I know that sucked ball bags, I just thought of it and tried to make a joke out of it. Gotta try huh?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college professor asks all of his students to yell out stereotypes for a class project For a class project, a college professor asks all of his students to brainstorm and yell out different kinds of stereotypes. "All blonde girls are dumb!" yells a boy in the back. "Sony!" Yells the blonde girl in the front.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After my girlfriend got pregnant, After my girlfriend got pregnant, everything changed. My address, my job, my phone number...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new harbour master... A new harbour master decided to send a toll man to a Russian ship and he told him "Be sure to be thorough they usually hide a lot of vodka" Amazingly the toll man didn''t find anything. But 5 days later the ship still hadn''t moved so he called the captain to see what the problem was. "Well your toll man looked everywhere so we had to throw the vodka out the windows and now we are stuck on a mountain of glass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What language does furniture speak? Forniture Polish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Past, Present and Future all walk into the bar at the same time... ... it was **tense**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was standing on a roof of a Hotel and threatened to Jump! I Yelled "Do A Flip" I am now Fired from the Suicide Watch...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the terrorists from Hoth? They call themselves Ice-IS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('bathroom joke How long a minutes is, depends on which side of the bathroom door you''re on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the hay upset? Because the straw was about to bale', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is the 21st century. Where deleting history is more important than creating history.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my dad yesterday if he knew how to ruin a good joke.... He fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At work tonight a woman stopped me and asked "Bathroom?" I replied, "No, my name is Chase, but you can piss on my face if you''d like."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never ask the Secretary of State for directions. All he''ll tell you to do is trun right and trun left. ( a \ a)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad was trembling when I told him my brother and I had gotten jobs as valets. I guess he really didn''t like the idea of having parking sons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Woody Joke What wood happen if you had a Wooden Car With Wooden Seats Wooden Tires And A Wooden Engine? It Wooden''t Start', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bowlegged doe comes walking out of the woods... And says thats the last time I do that for ten bucks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you have when you have two little green balls in the palm of your hand?? Kermits undivided attention!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the diffrence between a hormone and an enzym? I can make an enzym, but I can''t make a hormone', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not sure who this "OP" person is, but it seems like every guy on reddit has slept with his mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the man with no arms and no legs? The doctor said he would be arsing around for the rest of his life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('the husband said to his wife... husband honey call the plumber the toilet is stopped up again wife wtf! how did it happen again? husband how do you think it happened wife well I am not calling him you do it husband no you call him wife no husband call the fucking plumber wife fine when the husband came home from work his wife was fucking the plumber well that''s what he asked her to do', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst possible slogan for someone running for president in Germany? Make Germany great again', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, what made you fall ill in Hawaii? "Poi, son."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Measuring device. The device used to measure people''s gullibility is called a Gullibilometer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I spent last night defrosting the fridge Or "foreplay" as she used to call it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Canadians listen to when they go clubbing? Seal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a question on my math test that asked whether the slope of a line was positive or negative... I said yes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamas so fat It takes her 2 trips to haul ass!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('/r/Jokes is like America. Nothing Pro-Trump will get a popular vote.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m here to kiss ass and chew bubblegum. And I''m all out- wait, shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you experience when you meditate inside a Turkish prison? The deep state.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of swimsuit do you wear to the zoo? Zuchini', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s so easy to understand people who work at the US mint They make a lot of cents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I felt a little behind in Middle School It was a major bummer when the cops found out :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Freshman Seminar Professor Was Trying To Wow His Students He told them, "In the English Language, a double negative equals a positive. For example, I didn''t not do it equals I did it. But no double positive in English equals a negative." A student in the back shouted, "YEAH, RIGHT!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say I don''t have friends. They''re wrong. I have 10 seasons on DVD.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a car do when a ram is running towards it? Dodge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Arnold Schwarzenegger kill insects? Because he''s an ex-terminator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend just said this... "I know I''ve reached my ultimate form when all I do is hit dabs in my bathroom and watch Naruto."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mooncakes put the fat Into gong hei fat choy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in 2013, Beyonc did an amazing ''Lights Out'' performance. So did the stadium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is breakfast a prisoners favorite meal? Because he is a cereal killer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everything is so political nowadays I turned on nickelodeon to see Bob the builder building a wall so Dora couldn''t explore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t need both, but I want both That''s what he said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What the difference between carbon and my ex? She could form more than 4 bonds at the same time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A female chicken wearing a tie is known to do some weird shit with tentacles. Hentai.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People keep telling me I don''t have friends. That''s not true, I have all 10 seasons on DVD.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Donald Trump has sex, his female partner is always on top. Because he can only fuck up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the dwarf reach the cookies on top of the fridge? He Imp-provised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Buddhist walks into an ice cream shop and says make me one with everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dishwasher stopped working today Ironically, my dishwasher got the dishwasher in the divorce', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump doesn''t compare to universeal healthcare Bernie gets a call from Trump asking for advice. "...Ands that''s why I placed the ban, in order to hide my need hand growth serum." "Even with that serum, your hands are smaller than the medical bill of the average American with my universal healthcare plan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was gonna make an anal joke ..Butt fuck it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muslims say islam is the religion of peace Everyone else says they forgot the S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Utz and Disney are teaming up to make a new snack food. They''re called "Dis-Nutz".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer called his station back on Radio. He was at a murder scene where an old woman shot her husband for stepping on just mopped floor. Dispatch: So was an Arrest made ? Officer: Not yet. Dispatch: ? Officer: The floor is still wet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time does Sean Connery like to play racquet sports? Ten-ish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She''s a beautiful girl, inside and out... I know, because I''ve been inside her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most popular kind of music in the Czech Republic? Prague Rock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A deaf man to a man on street : are you deaf? Man on the street : no, I''m deaf! First man: oh! I thought you are deaf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Native American guy claimed I was insensitive to his culture, saying I''ve never walked a mile in their shoes. I asked What are you going to do? Sioux me?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Caught My wife walked in on me having sex with our daughter. I don''t know what she was more upset about. The fact that I was having sex with our daughter or that the abortion clinic let me keep her...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Trump''s favorite molecular bond? Van der Waals', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friend told me that I was already the Michael Jordan of my sport I play baseball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two southern belles are standing outside on a sunny day Elizabeth: "My husband got me this beautiful diamond ring yesterday, isn''t it just precious?" Evelyn: "How nice for you!" Elizabeth: "and this beautiful ranch was left to me by my daddy. Isn''t it just wonderful?" Evelyn: "How nice for you!" Elizabeth: "And my dear sweet brothers bought me those absolutely majestic horses you see off in the distance." Evelyn:"Well, how nice for you!". Elizabeth: "Evelyn you''re a beautiful, young woman. Surely the men in your life must take good care of you!" Evelyn: "Oh they do! My daddy really valued a good education and he sent me to boarding school. They taught literature, arithmetic, history, and how to speak in polite society. That''s where they taught me to say ''how nice for you'' instead of ''I don''t give a fuck''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s Halloween Little Johnny was on a park bench stuffing all of his Halloween candy in his mouth. An old lady came over and said. "Son, don''t you know that eating all of that candy will rot your teeth, give you acne, and make you sick?" "My grandfather lived to be 105 years old!" replied Johnny. "Did he eat five candy bars at a sitting?" the old lady retorted. "No," said Johnny, "but he minded his own freakin'' business."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters go out hunting in a forest They shoot a deer and begin dragging him back. However, they were dragging it by the tail and the antlers kept getting caught in the bushes and trees. Eventually, they pass by another hunter who advises them that they should hold the deer by the antlers so it doesn''t get caught. They decide to heed his advice and carry the deer by its antlers. Soon after a while, one hunter says to the other: "You know, that guy was right. This is a lot easier." The other hunter says "Yeah but I think we''ve been walking in the wrong direction"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris walks into a bar Edit: a bar walks into Chuck Norris', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wakes up one morning to find that he''s grown a thick beard and is wearing a turban.... He, being very concerned and disoriented, calls his boss in order to see if he can get the day off. Man: "Boss, I just woke up with a turban and a long, thick beard. I think I need a day to figure things out." Boss: " So what are you saying....?" Man: "I''m calling in Sikh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t blondes get sick very often? Viruses and bacteria also have their pride!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is being chased trough a city by two government agents. He sprints through the market, knocking over stands and booths. Then he turns down an alley way. His prosecutors were only mere feet away from him. They break from out of the alley way and run towards the docks. The man looks out and sees a ferry a good distance away from the edge. He runs down the pier, still being closely followed. With all his might, he leaps from the dock to the boat. He was hardly able to grab on, but he managed. The agents men stood at the end of the dock, smiling. The man stood up and it dawned on him; the ferry was coming in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does The Fonz like to eat? Chic-Fil-Ayyy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a Charlie Chaplin look alike contest, the guy who won was some German chap, the judges gave him perfect neins', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the funniest thing to ever come out of Sarah Silverman''s mouth? **A:** Jimmy Kimmel''s dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the kid swinging? Peer pressure. His friends started to do drugs last month.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Northern Iraqi with a yeast infection? A cheese Kurd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife asked me... "Why do you always rest your hands on top of my head when I go down on you?" I told her- "Because if I didn''t, I''d probably end up applauding."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I painted my laptop black... I painted my laptop black in the hopes that it would run faster... Now it doesn''t work. :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was feeling crumby. jokie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a pregnancy and alcoholism have in common? They can both be ended with a twelve step program', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what really blew people''s minds in the ''90s? Kurt Cobain''s suicide. Blew his too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom found out I am gay and that she doesn''t want me going down a dark road So I told her I was going to start dating black guys from now on. (Actual true story)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re a polyglot, you speak 4+ languages, if you''re trilingual you speak three languages, and if you''re bilingual you speak two languages. What are you if you speak one language? American', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is eco-friendly He''ll build his wall out of the (99%) recycled material on /r/Jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to know if your girlfriend is a slut on your first night. Requirements : a blue paint, a red paint and a hammer. Steps : 1. Paint one of your balls blue and the other one red. 2. Proceed towards your first coitus experience. 3. If you find your girlfriend saying "That''s the strangest pair of balls I have ever seen", hit her on the head with a hammer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who has had no friends for 5 years? A Sandy Hook survivor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer one turns to the other and says "does this person taste funny to you?", the other responds "I though this was pork!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are married women heavier than single women? A wedding ring has mass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you read the book "The Yellow River"? It''s the greatest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Jesus play rugby? He won''t support the hooker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever wondered why they have a women''s studies major in colleges but no men''s studies major? Well actually they do, it''s called World History.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 logicians walk into a bar the bartender asks "is everyone having a beer?" the first logician says "I dont know" the second logician says "I dont know" the third logician says "yes"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump passes a travel ban for all his supporters. They are not allowed to leave the county.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What event will Mexico win in the next summer Olympics? Hurdles, high jump and pole vault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Asked my dad what LGBT stands for He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What''s the ''g'' for?" Obviously I had to reply with "Garnish". [True story. My dad is not an idiot either, totally normal human.]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people dress up for their flights? Ain''t no one got time to dress you before your burial if the plane is falling. **If hell exists, I just bought 1st front row business class ticket there**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rockets? Maybe. But the Chinese haven''t contributed to aviation. After all, two Wongs don''t make a Wright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Al Gore had his own drumming software company he should name it... AlGoreRythyms', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I go out with a girl I always look in her eyes If she is not blind, I already know that I have no chance with her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the robbery at the bakery? The guy ab*scone*ded after the crime. I''ll see myself out...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have discovered a new gay dinasaour... The Megasoreass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend was reading an anti-gravity book... He couldn''t put it down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Jeffrey Dahmer have a blender on his front porch? So when he gets visitors, he can greet them with a hand shake!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I watched a porno movie last night... It was pretty good but the plot had a lot of holes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hit the gym today. Broke my hand on the entrance doors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a mountain sized bird made of? Well, part cliff, partridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can predict the punchline If you''re a fortune teller...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by gatecrashing an amputee conference... It was just a bit of ''armless fun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ive never been married, but I can imagine how it feels... I once had a stone stuck in my shoe for 10 hours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dunno why people like to associate Comcast with the Nazis It''s not like they''re the fascist out there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Swim Race A local pool was holding a swim meet for the disabled. There were three contestants, one man had no arms, one man had no legs, and one man was just a disembodied head. The contestants got up on their blocks and prepared for the race. The starting pistol fired and the three men dove into the water. the man with no arms took the early lead, the man with no legs was gaining ground, and the head sunk straight to the bottom as a trail of bubbles floated to the surface. The race ended and the man with no legs swam down to save the head. He placed the head on the deck and after a couple of coughs the head turned to the staff and shouted "You Motherfucker, three fucking years I''ve been learning to swim with my fucking ears and two minutes before the start you put a goddamn swim cap on me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You remind me of a door Because you''re a-door-able :}', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried coming up with a joke about mean people. But they were all just average', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Enough about my weight!!! Ive had it with your silly remarks about my weight. Im leaving you! But honey, what about our child? What child?! Oh, so youre not pregnant?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mommy, why are all the cars beeping their horns? Son: Mommy, why are all the cars beeping their horns? Mother: Because theres a wedding going on. Son: But isnt the horn a warning signal, Mommy? Mother: Exactly, son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I call my ex-girlfriend Titanic Jack Because she''s as cold as ice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what did the pencil sharpener say to the broken pencil.. that he should stop acting so littlepointed..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s like Wal-Mart. Errybody''s been to her grand opening!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never understood why everyone hates mean people. I just think their average.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when you commit suicide on Hanukkah A Jewicide', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s New Book I was walking in the mall and I saw that there was an Arabic bookstore. The sign outside led me to wonder just what exactly was in a Muslim bookstore, so I went in. As I was wandering around taking a look, the clerk gave me the stink eye, but asked if he could help me. I know I didn''t look like his normal clientele, so I asked, Do you have a copy of Donald Trump''s Book on his U.S. Immigration policy regarding Muslims and Illegal aliens? The clerk said, Kiss my ass, Get out, and Stay Out! I said, Yes, that''s the one. Do you have it in paperback?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old woman lies dead on the side of the road... and she has semen in her eyes. The policeman looked at her and said ''Looks like she saw her killer coming.'' (Not sure if this one was posted before, I saw it on another site and couldn''t see it here)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ballons ballons are like souls,they wanna go up but they can''t and when you pop them,they scream...sorry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman tells her friend she is getting married for the fourth time. "How wonderful! I hope you don''t mind me asking, what happened to your first husband?" "He ate poisonous mushrooms and died." "Oh, how tragic! What about your second husband?" "He also ate poisonous mushrooms and died." "Oh, how terrible! I''m almost afraid to ask you about your third husband." "He died of a broken neck." "A broken neck?" "He wouldn''t eat the mushrooms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that if you spell... Window backwards is window. It''s not, but for a second you believed me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once tried greeting everyone I met by saying "titanic"... Turns out it wasn''t a very good ice breaker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rape is not funny Unless you are raping a clown', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My life completely changed after I learned Morse Code. To me, "life" just became a series of dots and dashes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Jamaican say after winning the barefoot marathon? "Da trill of victory always betta dan de agony of de feet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not that hard to tell an alligator and a crocodile apart.. One will see you later and the other will see you in a while', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fire is hot And ISIS cold', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you eat when you go hiking? Trail mix', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does an Arab guy say when he''s happy? - Yemen! What does an Arab guy say when something upsets him? - Oman...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I remember tears in my eyes when dad chopped onions. Onions was a great dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone asked me to validate their parking So I said, "You did a very good job. I am very proud of you." ^^I''m ^^sorry. ^^I ^^actually ^^said ^^that ^^to ^^someone ^^at ^^work ^^today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I went to my meeting of the Premature Ejaculation group Turns out it is tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bird that punches people? Steven Seagull', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to an international "Flat Earther" convention the other day Turns out they have members all around the world', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend Gary doesn''t know why Richard isn''t interested in his donkey... He really wants to get Dick into his ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than ants in your pants? Uncles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are people so outraged and grossed out by incest? I think they should get some perspective. There are much worse things happening in the world and, really, it''s all relative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bartender walks into a stable The horse says "Why the wrong place?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife asked me, "Why don''t you ever come to yoga class with me??"... "That''s kind of a stretch for me"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I understand why bakers are addicted to baking bread. Sometimes they just knead it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve got Yellow Fever.. Don''t hit on me just because I''m Asian', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife bought a new dress and asked me if it made her look fat I said, "Of course not, honey. It''s not the dress. It''s your lack of discipline and self-control."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally ate some food coloring the other day... The doctor said that I''m fine, but I still feel like a little bit of me dyed that day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket? How far do you think I can kick this bucket?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife treats her husband by taking him to a strip club for his birthday. At the club, the doorman says, "Hi Jim, how are you?" The wife asks, "How does he know you?" Jim says, "Oh dear, I play football with him." Inside the Bartender Says, "The Usual, Jim?" Jim says to Wife, "Before you say anything, He''s on the Darts team." Next a stripper Says, "Hi Jim! Do you crave the special again?" The Wife storms out dragging Jim with her & jumps into a taxi. The Taxi driver Says, "Hey Jimmy boy! You picked up an ugly one this time..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL how not to install a fence Ooops... wrong place for this post', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a feminists favorite operating system? eunuch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get payed for doing nothing all day? Become an FBI agent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wouldn''t piss on Donald Trump if he were on fire. But for $100,000 a few Russian hookers will.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a refrigerator and a child? It isn''t a crime to stick your meat in a refrigerator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t Trump have a pet dog at the White House? He only pets pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is like the biggest fish I ever caught. Just keeps getting bigger and bigger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son asked me if I like his hand after he taped a bunch of coins to it I said I like the change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make one million dollars in a month? Start with five million and become a day trader.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are cars, computer parts, and animals similar? Dodge Ram, RAM, and the ram.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Added Paul Walker on Xbox Live We never really get around to playing games though, he''s always just stuck on the dashboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I stopped a rape from happening today! All I had to do was stop chasing her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lost 130lbs & gained a new life. Soon I''ll be rolling in pussy! Girlfriend is gone now, but she left her pregnant cat behind on the bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Audi botched their new commercial I guess they can say Audi-ous to their customers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every "yo momma" joke has been done thousands of times, by thousands of different people. Kinda like yo momma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WWII, two Soviet soldiers, who both used to be theater announcers, are sitting in the trenches... Then they hear the radio announcement: "Comrades, it''s with a heavy heart that I must tell you this bad news: city of Bryansk was occupied by the Germans today." One of them says to the other one, "Pfff, you call that a city? Two 500-seaters at best!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Donald Trumps first comment after moving into the Oval Office? "Hey fellas, it''s so nice of you to leave some condoms for me in the desk drawer, but their diameter is about 3X too large!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than ants in your pants? Uncles in your pants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life as a redditor I saw a pretty girl. Finally I plucked up the courage, and asked for her number. She said "got a pen?" I said yes. She said "well get back in it you fat fucking pig".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is red and smells like blue paint Red paint', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse were in divorce court and the judge said to Mickey... "You say here that your wife is crazy." Mickey replied, "No I didn''t, I said she was fucking Goofy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get why everyone is so worried about Trump. He hasn''t even been in office for a month. I''m sure once he has some time to learn and get things done, America will turn out all white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just heard Michael Vick retired... Doesn''t surprise me. He was an old dog anyways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An antidepressant a day Keeps me from blowing my head away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I keep telling my female friend that my dick is great... She just needs to be in a position to appreciate it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Charles Umar Terrence-Elliott Able to get so many dates? People always think he''s cute, initially.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[nsfw] What did Trump feel when he heard about the civilian casualties in Yemen? Beluga caviar popping against the roof of his mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats something that''s hard and long and full of seamen? A submarine of course!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are people with aspergers really not able to detect sarcasm? Sorry to break it to you, but I think you have aspergers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends are hanging out one day, Jim, and Bob. And Jim has a black eye. Bob asks, "Hey what happened to your eye?" Jim sighs and explains, "Well, I was in church, and we''re all standing, and well, the lady in front of me, her skirt was tucked into her ass-crack! So I reached forward, and pulled her skirt out! She turns around and pops me right in the face!" So, a week later, these two friends meet up again, and Jim shows up with ANOTHER black eye! Bob says "Dude, did you do it again? You can''t just pull a lady''s skirt out like that!" Jim replies, "Nope, nope, so I''m in church again, right? And the same lady is in front of me, and the exact same thing happens! Her skirt was stuck in her ass again! Well, the guy next to me sees it and he pulls her skirt out of her ass-crack! But I knew she didn''t like that. So I tucked it right back in there!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, I''m a lesbian "That''s okay", says her dad "We still have your sister." "Sorry dad", says his second daughter "I''m lesbian, too" Their father sighs: "So nobody here digs men?" "I still do!" calls his son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Shakespeare say on the last day if his summer vacation? Once more unto the beach', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just heard there''s a cure for dyslexia It was like music to my arse', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a few seconds one whispers to the other Thats got to be the fastest we ever got to the accident site.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s something sinister about the woman who stands next to me at the male sex doll factory She gives me the willies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The MOMA announced that they were opening a new section in the museum for art from Madrid. Nobody expected the Spanish exhibition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy with no limbs in a pile of leaves? Russell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New Patent A company has just requested a patent for a laser that prohibits name brand sunglasses: A Ray-Ban ban ray, if you will.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was so poor growing up If I didn''t wake up with an erection I had nothing to play with', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two silk worms Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is giving her kindergarten class a spelling test. She asks a boy named Paul to spell the first word. ''Paul, spell dog.'' Paul answers, ''D-O-G.'' ''Very good!'' says the teacher. She then asks a girl named Mary to spell the second word. ''Mary, spell cat.'' she says. Mary answers, ''C-A-T.'' ''Well done Mary!'' says the teacher. She then asks a boy named Hussein to spell the third word. ''Hussein, spell discrimination against foreigners.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first time I went on a plane, I was such a caveman about it. I got lost and sat on the wrong seat twice, I banged my head on the overhead compartment (twice) and walked right up to the cockpit door mid flight because I couldn''t find the toilets, and the flight attendant got upset at me. Then, I left the plane at the destination and forgot to get my bag from under the seat, so I had to wait til everyone had left and then the FA wouldn''t let me go back and get it, said she would get it for me. Asked me where I was sitting, and I didn''t have my ticket stub, so I just said "In the back" and she looked at me as if to say "Well you sure as fuck weren''t up the front, were you?" I cried at home and almost quit the co-pilot job the following day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar every time a baby boomer insulted me... I could afford a house in the economy they ruined', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alaskan Eye Doctor I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island... but it turned out to be an optical aleutian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would like to buy some cyanide A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription." Edit: Shit, I forgot! Credit to u/albert3us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Watson walks in on Sherlock having sex with a younger looking girl "Bloody hell, Sherlock! What''d you think you''re doing bangin'' that chick. She looks like she''s in highschool" Sherlock replied, "Elementary, my dear Watson"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Jeffrey Dahmer keep a blender on his front porch? To greet people with a handshake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Filipino, an Indian, and a Pakistani get arrested in Saudi Arabia A Filipino, an Indian, and a Pakistani get arrested in Saudi Arabia for drinking alcohol. They are given a sentence of 50 lashes each. Before execution of their punishments each of them is given a chance to ask a wish. The Filipino requests that a pillow be tied to his back. The wish is granted and he''s given 50 lashes. Indian asks for 2 pillows to be tied to his back. Again the wish is granted and 50 lashes given. Now only the Pakistani is left and he asks to please be allowed to make 2 wishes. Reluctantly, they accept his demand and ask what are his two wishes. Pakistani man says: 1. Give me 100 lashes instead. 2. Tie the Indian to my back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW]Two Scottish lasses are walking to school one morning... ...when they come upon a man passed out under a tree after a night out drinking. They approach the burly, bearded man and one girl says " I n''er seen a mans penis before. Let''s take a peek!" So, they lift the mans kilt and the other exclaims " It looks like a wee chick sitting in a nest! It needs a cute bow!" She pulls a ribbon from her hair, ties it around the sleeping mans member and they continue on their way. A spell later the man wakes, stands and begins to stretch when he feels a pinch on his boabie. He lifts his kilt and sees a ribbon tied around himself. After a moment he smiles and says to his-self: "Och, I doont know where ye been but I see ye took first place!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three blondes were driving to Disneyland... Three blondes were driving to Disneyland. When they were close to the destination they saw a sign: Disneyland Left. They stopped, started to cry and finally turned around and drove back home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What camps are designed for people with ADHD? Concentration camps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once dated a girl named Plosion but then we broke up I guess you could say she is an exPlosion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bears are eating a cannibal. Two bears are eating a cannibal. One turns to the other and asks: "Since we are eating a cannibal, are we eating more than one person?" The Other responds: "HOLY SHIT! A TALKING BEAR!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vladimir Putin takes Donald Trump fishing out on the black sea... Vladimir Putin takes Donald Trump fishing out on the black sea. After having his line in the water for a few hours, Donald finally has a bite. And its a big one. At first, he threatens the fish. I will drop a nuclear bomb on you if you dont get in this boat. It doesnt work. In fact, the fish starts to fight harder. Next, he takes to twitter This fish isnt man enough to face me on board this boat. Sad! The fish isnt swayed. So finally, Trump shouts I will send in a Navy SEAL team to kill your entire family! The fish is scared and quickly jumps on the boat. Before even taking it off the line, Trump picks the fish up and holds it high above his head. He squeezes its bladder down onto face. Trump notices Putin looking on in disgust and says, What? You knew I love Russian hookers pissing on my face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Democratic Party [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Brother has 2 tickets to the 2017 Super Bowl -- HELP! My brother has 2 tickets to the upcoming Super Bowl! He was so excited and paid the $3,500 for each ticket as soon as they went on sale. However, he didn''t realize that the game would land on the day of his wedding.. If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.. It will be at St. Francis Church in Des Moines, Iowa at 3:45 p.m. She is 5 '' 7'''' and weighs about 145 pounds. She''s a great cook, and will be in the white dress!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? a sheep can hear a zipper from 100 meters away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t milk cartons wear flip flops? Because they lactose', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown, lonely and sits on a piano bench? Beethoven''s last movement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between calling out to your hispanic friend vs calling out to your Ex? You shout "Jorge!" when calling to your friend. You shout "Hey Whore!" when calling to your ex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Local Hero saves lady from Dog A man in USA sees a dog attacking a girl! He kicks the dog, it dies! Newspapers report: "Local Hero saves lady from Dog" Man says I''m not American Report changed: "Foreign Hero Saves girl from Dog" Man says: Actually I''m Pakistani Breaking News: "Terrorist killed Innocent Dog which was playing with a girl"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black man whos an astronaut? An astronaut, you fucking racist...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All sex offenders follow the golden rule... You touch you take.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why I got divorced HUSBAND: My wife where are you? WIFE: At home love. HUSBAND: Are you sure? WIFE: Yes. HUSBAND: Turn on the blender. WIFE: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee HUSBAND: Ok my love goodbye. Another day HUSBAND: My wife where are you? WIFE: At home love HUSBAND: Are you sure? WIFE: Yes HUSBAND: Turn on the blender WIFE: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee HUSBAND: Ok my love goodbye The next day, the husband decides to go home without notice, and finds his son alone and he asked him son where is your mother? SON: I don''t know, she went out with the blender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s 4 things I hate in this world. Racism, niggers, and people who can''t count.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend asked me what to do this evening... My girlfriend asked me what I wanted to do this evening? Should we go out bowling or should we go upstairs and mess around in the bed? I told her that I am NOT going to put my fingers in some dirty hole where hundreds of guys had put their fingers in before me!!! So we went bowling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say that if you are good and righteous you will ascend into heaven... Otherwise you will split apart into small groups.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adolf Hitler has never touched Call of Duty... ...and yet, he still has a better KDR than me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find firehoes? In the alley behind the firehouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate when people ask me if I''m hard at work... Every time I am, I get written up by the HR lady.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross semen and cum? SPum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not really a religious person, but I do like to keep my weed in a hollowed-out Bible... I guess you could call me an eighth-theist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it so hard to find a priest in Amsterdam? They''re all high priests.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men are walking by a restaurant Two men are walking by a restaurant and one of them says, "That smells amazing! Lets get something." The other man replies, "But they don''t let dogs in, what are we going to do with them." The first man puts on a pair of sunglasses and has his friend do the same and says, "Follow my lead." He starts to walk into the restaurant and the waiter stops him, "You cannot bring dogs in here sir." The man gets offended, "Excuse me sir! This is my seeing eye dog, I am blind." The waiter questions this, "But your dog is a pit bull?" The man replies, "I know, I am a very important person, I need protection as well." The first man passes through and the second man begins to walk through when the waiter stops him and asks him the same question. The man replies, "This is my seeing eye dog too." The waiter replies, "Really? A chihuahua?" The man freaks out, "What?! They gave me a chihuahua?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone made Bob Ross mad *artistic screeching*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got fired for sticking my penis in the meat grinder... that punishment was nothing compared to the one I got when I told my wife that the meat grinder''s name is Jenny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my North Korean friend how it was to live in North Korea He said he cant complain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a black person nervous? Take him with you to an auction. A joke a classmate told me. Simon, if you read this: enough credits? :P', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs. Three women were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man. The first woman said "Have you ever had a hug?" The man said "No," so she gave him a hug and walked on. The second woman said "Have you ever had a kiss?" The man said "No," so she gave him a kiss and walked on. The third woman came to him and said "Have you ever been fucked?" The fellow said "No", She said "You will be when the tide comes in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy... A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye matey!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call cheese that isn''t yours? Nacho Cheese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Im graduating for my biology study in a few weeks.. Im writing a killer fotosynthesis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have discovered a rare mutation that causes autosomal dominant inheritance of violent diarrhea In hindsight we should''ve known something like that would run in the genes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a drunk man, wandering the street... And he comes across a priest. He says to him, "I''m Jesus Christ." The priest replies, "No, you''re not." The drunk is confident in his Christ-ness, and says that he can prove it. So the drunk leads the priest to a bar, professing his divinity the whole way. They arrive and enter. The bartender sees the drunk and says, "Jesus Christ, you''re here again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had to perform surgery on a lamb''s brain yesterday. Just call me a gyro surgeon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a nosy pepper do? Gets jalapeo business', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the pianist go to jail? Because he would only play with A Minor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One shudders to think how much worse the Bowling Green Massacre would have been... ... If it weren''t for the heroic intervention by Frederick Douglass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe enters a pun competition Each contestent is allowed to enter 10 puns, so Joe thinks of his 10 best puns and writes them down, after judges decided which puns won, the announcer decided to read off the 10 best, as the last pun was read, Joe was defeated, none of his puns won! No pun in ten did', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar in Bangkok... a sign reads: Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 Hand Job: $10.00 The man walks up to a barmaid. Man: Are you the one who gives the hand jobs? Barmaid: Why, yes. That''s me. Man: Then go wash your hands! I want a cheese sandwich.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lady buys cyanide A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aren''t you really busy tomorrow? "Woah buddy don''t assume my agenda"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Donald Trump fail his college math class? He was uncomfortable with the concept of integration.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time do you go to the dentist? Tooth hurty', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a pound of fat look sexy? Put a nipple on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If i had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive They would eventually find me attractive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my grandma died, I got her most prized vagina fart in a bottle. She bequeefed it to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are hippy drum circles like high frequency radiation? They both cause the formation of free radicals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirates favorite toy? Aaaarrhh Sea Boats!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a guy asked me if I ever dropped my phone in a beer before... I said "yeah, once in a Blue Moon".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the sexual orientation of a bodybuilder? Bicepsual', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to get back into my house but I can''t, There''s a door in the way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend broke up with me for listening to Linkin Park But in the end it doesn''t even matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a schizophrenic fruit? Pearanoid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl goes to the doctor... Putting his stethoscope to the young woman''s chest, the doctor said, "Big breaths, dear." She smiled. "Yup. And I''m not even thixteen yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I won''t be getting another iphone because of the horrible shellback. *spellcheck! Not shellback! Ducking phone...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the first day of school, and the teacher was going around the classroom asking each of the children to spell their names. It was the first day of school, and the teacher was going around the classroom asking each of the children to spell their names. "D-O-R-I-S L-E-H-I-G-H," said one, and the teacher dutifully recorded it in her attendance book. "T-I-M M-O-R-I-A-R-T-Y," said another. "E-L-S-I-E," said another. "No," the teacher told the girl, "I need your whole name." "Oh," said the girl. "V-A-G-I-N-A."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why would Groot make a terrible spy? Because he''s an obvious plant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s Inauguration Speech Was Uploaded onto Pornhub "Rich White Man Fucks Entire Country"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few weeks in they''re already talking about impeachment... What an un-presidented turn of events.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man brings his cat.... A man brings his cat to a veterinarian. He lives the cat there and returns in two days, as preagreed. He asks the veterinarian: Is my cat still alive? Still not...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst part about time travelling jokes? Yours considered a Repost when they take it and go back and use it before you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away... But my aim is terrible so...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a racist joke? Nevermind. None of the white people would understand it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like my pickles. Sweet and petite ( a \ a)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man steps in a diner and orders some coffee... The waitress brings it over and lies it on the table. The moment the man takes a sip, he spits it out, shouting, "This coffee tastes like boiled dirt!", and the waitress says, "I wouldn''t be surprised, it was ground this morning."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Donkey Fell Into A Bowl Of Sugar What a sweet ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your mommy ... would sit between America and Mexico Trump doesnt need to build a wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Pavlov is drinking in a bar. Then a man enters the bar and rings the bell on top of the door. Pavlov says "Oh shit, I forgot to feed the dog"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay version of Donald Trump? Flaming Hot Cheeto!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Biggie mad at 2Pac? It all started when 2pac innocently said, "Yeah, sure, it''s cool, invite all the rappers to my party, no biggie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People all over the country are dropping dead due to high blood sugar... I guess they''re suffering from a serious case of Die-betes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hungry Clock When a clock eats, does it go back four seconds?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. In my case, it is a sexually transmitted disease.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw thor reading a thor comic... to be honest, I think it might be a metathor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is still upset about me calling her fat 10 years ago... I guess it''s true what they say, elephants do remember everything. Edit: Damn, just realised someone else posted a similar joke recently. Sorry for the accidental repost, I will go home and rethink my life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the worst kind of jokes? Unfunny jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Knock Knock Joke *Knock knock* Who''s there? Erma. Erma who? Ermagerd, stop with all that knocking!!! .... so I was very tired. At least my fianc laughed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Jews so good at racing? Because they used to step on the gas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what''s really odd? Numbers not divisible by two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love hockey. It''s really an ice game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did the geologist husband and mineralogist wife buy their first home? In agated community.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer One turns to the other and asks, "does this taste funny to you?" The other responds, "no."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My refuel warning is always on, even after I''ve just filled up! I think I''m being gaslighted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the rooster cross the road His wife left him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say that Steve Jobs died to soon. But I think it was a fitting metaphor for his companys attitude to battery life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most valuable kind of sheep? A ewe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the sun annoyed to be called a she? Cause it''s a non-binary star', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you say the word poop, your mouth does the same motion as your butt hole. Same can be said for the phrase "explosive diarrhea".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst type of suicide ? The failed one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Soviet Russia, Muslims ban America!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-when I donate blood I don''t have to do it my self, the nurse does it.. -yes but this is a sperm bank and it''s different -awful service', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with terminal cancer is gazing at the sunset. As he''s looking back on his life and coming to terms with his death, he gets a sort of primal urge to just start digging a hole. So he grabs a shovel and digs and digs and keeps digging. He digs so far down that he breaks into the roof of a cave, falls to the floor, and dies. This joke isn''t very funny, but it sure is deep!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than 69? 77 because you get ate more. -Redd Foxx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the snail say when it rode a turtle? "WEEEEEEEEEEEE"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do plants use to fill holes in walls, Chloroplast-er', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love February because it contains two of my favorite annual events Groundhog Day, and the State of the Union Address. One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a notoriously unreliable mammal for prognostication with no basis in reality. The other involves a groundhog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who wins an argument? The side with the most points.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians? The drummer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hitler seems to get a lot of hate these days, but to the man''s credit.. he *did* kill Hitler.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do women who just got dumped and advanced programmers have in common? They both want closure!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Melania divorces Donald Trump Then an immigrant will get half of the US in the divorce settlement :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m never sure if it''s a Dad joke Are those the ones that hit you later when you''re doing something else? Or the ones you don''t get till the weekend? :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asked little Johnny a question... Teacher: If I gave you 2 cats, and another 2 cats and another 2 cats, how many cats would you have? Little Johnny: Seven! Teacher: No, listen carefully. If I gave you 2 cats, and another 2 cats and another 2 cats, how many cats would you have? Little Johnny: Seven! Teacher: Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have? Little Johnny: Six. Teacher: Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have? Little Johnny: Seven! Teacher: Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?! Little Johnny: Because I''ve already got a freaking cat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a rock guitarist and a folk guitarist? A rock guitarist can play all night without tuning and folk guitarist can tune all night without playing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and orders a drink, when suddenly he hears someone say, "Hey, nice tie!" The man looks up to try to find out who said it, but no one was around. "Hey! Nice shirt!" The man looks up again, but there''s nobody there. "Hey! Nice suit!" The man then calls the bartender over and asks him if he keeps talking to him. The bartender replies, "It''s not me; it''s the complimentary peanuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Great Friday morning! My Friday morning fun... so I was pulling into the gas station and when I got out of the car, I noticed these two police officers looking at a woman who was smoking while fueling up. I went in to get a drink and as I was checking out, I hear someone screaming. I look out and that woman''s arm was on fire! She was tossing and waving her arm around and just going crazy! I ran outside and the officers had put her on the ground and were putting the fire out with an extinguisher. I saw that the officers put hand cuffs on her and were about to put her in the police car. I was thinking "What in the world?"... so being the concerned person that I am, I asked the officers what they were arresting her for? He looked me dead in my eye and said... "Waving a firearm!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m worried about my friend. He was bragging about getting a handjob from his teacher. I said, "That''s disgusting, you''re homeschooled."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Russians, Vlad and Ivan, decided to have a race. Both long distance runners, they decided the end would be a large rock a few miles past the Russia-Finland border. Vlad was ahead for most of the race, but he faltered soon after the border and was passed by Ivan, who won. "I told you I would win!" said Ivan. "You may have won," replied Vlad, "but I beat you to the Finnish line."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I gave a girl my phone number and told her to text me when she got home. I guess shes homeless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Invisible... A psychiatrist''s secretary walked into his study and said, "There''s a gentleman in the waiting room asking to see you. Claims he''s invisible." The psychiatrist responded, "Tell him I can''t see him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kids were talking... Kid 1: I bet you''re a virgin Kid 2: I was a virgin, until last night! Kid 1: Lies! Kid 2: Ask your sister. Kid 1: Ha! I don''t have a sister! Kid 2: You will in about nine months! Edit: Thanks for the support guys!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whatever you do always give 100 %. Unless you are donating blood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his toe? Mi to sis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I see a girl, I first look at her hair. Then at her eyes, lips, neck... Damn dial-up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told my wife I was going to give her something for Valentines I''ve never given her before She said "An orgasm?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the DNA say to the other DNA? Do these genes make me look fat?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('May I sleep with your sister? is such an awkward question to ask. I have no idea how my dad is going to respond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How will Trump add yuge amounts of manufacturing jobs? He will build alternative fact-tories', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they''re ugly...and they smell bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My life completely changed after I learned Morse Code Last night, for example, I couldn''t fall asleep because the rain kept telling me to go fuck myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Uber CEO Travis Kalanick quit the Trump advisory council? He couldn''t get a ride...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. -Who''s there? -The doctor! -Doctor who? -Yes, that''s me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish military man from Israel told me this joke. Deep in the desert. Mehmet, an Arab fighter (or militant, if you will) chases an Israeli soldier, let''s call him Moshe, with an AK47 gun. Mehmet closes on Moshe and starts firing at him but misses. The chase continues through the desert, there''s quite a lot of firing from Mehmet and quite a lot of bullet dodging from Moshe. At one point Mehmet''s gun refuses to fire - Mehmet''s out of ammunition. Moshe hears the clicking of the empty gun, turns triumphantly to Mehmet and says: "Out of bullets, huh? Wanna buy some?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest asks a custodian to watch the confessional booth while he takes a piss.. While the custodian is quietly waiting, a beautiful, long-legged blonde walks into the booth. She says "Father forgive me for I have sinned it has been 1 month since my last confession, and I have given a blowjob!" The janitor isn''t sure what the priest would tell her to do so he pops his head out to ask the altar boy "hey, what do you get for a blowjob!?" The altar boy replies "usually a soda and a candy bar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I read an article that said it''s good for your eyesight to look at something distant occasionally during computer use. So I put a picture of my dad next to the monitor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing, they''re both stuck up cunts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A feminist asked me how I view lesbians... ... apparently in HD wasn''t the correct answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had a great time protesting at UC Berkeley! It was a riot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are married women heavier than single women? When single women get home, they settle in, take a peek at what''s in the fridge, and head for bed. When married women get home, they settle in, take a peek at what''s in bed, and head for the fridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Complaint from 3017: These children''s long-term zero gravity soccer leagues are raising weak adults. Every kid gets atrophy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish military man from Israel told me this joke. Deep in the desert. Mehmet, an Arabic fighter (Or militant, if you will) with an AK47 handgun is chasing a lone Israeli soldier, let''s call him Mosche. Mehmet closes on Mosche and starts firing at him but misses. The chase continues, there is quite a lot of firing from Mehmet and quite a lot of bullet dodging from Mosche. At one point Mehmet tries to fire again only to realise he''s out of ammunition. Mosche turns to Mehmet triumphantly, looks him squarely in the eye, and says: "I got some bullets in the bag. Wanna buy?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told This By A Coworker A While Back Long Btw A man gets home absolutely hammered at 3:00 p.m on a Tuesday and goes up to his wife and says, "I wanna 69 right now". The wife goes "Uhmm, sure". So they get into it and about 20min later there''s a knock at the door, so the guy gets a pair of pants on and goes and answers the door. At the door is Johnny the paper boy, and when Johnny sees the guy he starts to laugh really friggin'' hard. So the guy goes "What? What''s funny?" And Johnny points at his upper lip, so the guy reaches up and wipes his lip, and sees a smear of red on his hand, the guy immediately goes "Oh no, it''s not what you think, I was just in the kitchen eating a Jelly sandwich." And Johnny replies "I''m not laughing about the Jelly on your lip, I''m laughing about the peanut butter in your hair."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tried going to the obesity clinic before work today. But the queue was enormous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the old one about a woman doing a survey on sexual attitudes? She stops an airline pilot and asks him, amongst other things, when he last had sexual intercourse. He replies 1958. Now, knowing airline pilots, the researcher is surprised and queries this. Well, says the pilot, it''s only 2110 now. (Credit, John Cleese c. 1991)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I first met my son I thought he was a whiny little baby. But he grew on me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The husband asks the wife... The husband asks the wife: -Babe which do you like the best, strawberry or banana? The wife asks him: -Why are you at the Supermarket? The husband replys: No I''m at the pharmacy...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I almost talked my way out of a speeding ticket by telling the women officer she looked stunning.. Then I fucked up by telling her "and that''s not even the drinks talking".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer buys a young rooster As soon as it comes home, it screws all the 153 hens... The farmer is impressed thinking about the eggs the hens would hatch. At lunch, the young energetic rooster again screws all the 153 hens. The farmer got tensed up now. Next day, he finds the rooster screwing the ducks & the geese and parrot too which scared the hell out of him. Later that day, the farmer finds the rooster lying pale, half-dead & vultures circling overhead. Farmer says "You deserved it, you Hot little bastard! you deserve this "The rooster opens one eye, points up & says "Ssshhh. Let them land, I''ve never screwed a vulture in my whole career".....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oh Darling... Oh darling, since youve started dieting, youve become such a passionate kisser& What do you mean, passionate? Im looking for food remains!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just ended a 5 year relationship today. It''s okay. It wasn''t my relationship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus Christ goes up to heaven... He walks up an old man and says "Excuse me but I''m looking for my father. The old man says "That''s funny! I''m looking for my son!" Jesus says "Well, actually, my father isn''t really my father". The old man says "That''s funny! My son isn''t really my son!" Jesus says "My father was a carpenter". The old man says "That''s funny! I''M a carpenter!!!" Jesus throws his arms around the old man and say "Daaaaaad!" The old many throws his arms around Jesus and says "Pinocchio!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Juan Pablo Robato walks into a pet store Juan Pablo goes to the front counter. "Hola, my name is Juan Pablo Robato, and I am here to buy a pet. What kinds of animals do you sell here?" "Well, we mostly sell dogs, or doggos as the kids on the internet say." "Do you sell gatos?" Juan Pablo inquired. "Yes we sell cats, put like I said, mostly dogs." "Are there any other animals for sale?" "No, we only have dogs and cats here." Juan Pablo replied "So you''re telling me, if I wanted to buy a pet here, I''d have to buy a- " "Doggo or a gato, Mr. Robato." "Ah. I see."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My roommate was a monster He said he hated me with every inch of his soul. He would take ants and put them on my face and clothes. I did nothing whatsoever at him. I''ve since left that room, but I wished he didn''t antagonize me that much.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife treats her husband by taking him to a strip club for his birthday. At the club, the doorman says, "Hi Jim, how are you?" The wife asks, "How does he know you?" Jim says, "Oh dear, I play football with him." Inside the Bartender Says, "The Usual, Jim?" Jim says to Wife, "Before you say anything, He''s on the Darts team." Next a stripper Says, "Hi Jim! Do you crave the special again?" The Wife storms out dragging Jim with her & jumps into a taxi. The Taxi driver Says, "Hey Jimmy boy! You picked up an ugly one this time..." Jim''s Funeral is on Sunday!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I couldn''t be happier! For the first time in my life a girl told me she loves me. Aren''t moms great?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Raise!! Sam walks into his bosss office and says Sir, Ill be straight with you, I know the economy isnt great, but I have over three companies after me, and I would like to respectfully ask for a raise. After a few minutes of haggling, the boss finally agrees to a 5% raise, and Sam happily gets up to leave. By the way, asks the boss, Which three companies are after you? The electric company, water company, and the phone company!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are malay people so thin? Because they muslim.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What turns a fruit into a vegetable? Aids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s "meme" in French? Moimoi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need help I have a problem of creating topics just for the sake of delivering some lame ass punchline or a pun even if the topic itself is moot, and I need professional help with that. It just happens like one-two and that''s that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It confuses me why people feel comfortable with government surveillance as they have nothing to hide, so nothing to fear.... &.but get really scared when I ask them to take their clothes off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so embarrassed, I got caught getting a blow job by my mum last week.. The worst thing is it was my dad who caught us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The trump family is flying from New York to DC Donald looks down on the cities below and says "I think I''ll throw a 1000$ bill out of the window and make some american happy. Melanie says "Oh honey why not throw 10 100$ bills and make 10 americans happy?" So then Ivanka says "Even better daddy, throw 100 ten dollar bills out of the window and make 100 americans happy?" To that the pilot says " Why dont you all jump out the window and make the whole country happy?" EDIT: Thank you for the gold!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a genie lamp and it turned out to be an "animal" genie I rubbed the strange looking lamp with excitement and the genie proptly came out. Me: "this is great! So, do i get three wishes?" Genie: "no sir, i am a special kind of genie, an animal genie, i can grant you the wish to turn you into any animal you''d like. Any animal, just name it." Me: "well i wasn''t expecting this, but dog, definitely dog!" Genie: "really? A dog? I mean, you could be any majestic creature that you want. You could be a formidable rhinoceros or a mighty eagle and soar the skies looking for prey. Maybe even a whale, a dolphin, a fearsome shark, so many options to choose from." Me: "Okay, Do any of those like their own dick and balls?" Genie: "uhh.. no I don''t think so" Me: "dog it is! edit: formatting', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy and Mick walk past a police station.... Paddy and Mick walk past a police station, with a sign up saying "Two Brazilian men wanted for rape". Paddy turns to Mick and says "Ah Jaysus, dem fuckers always get the best jobs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my coffee... Hot and all over my lap while I''m driving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aladdin sings to Jasmine "I can show you the woorld.. Except the United States"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a young dog''s favourite type of pizza? pupperoni', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my jokes how I like my laundry Dry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vegetable rationing Some supermarkets are rationing lettuce, I think this is just the tip of the iceberg...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mother... - Yo mama is hairy, she shaves her legs with a weed wacker. - Yo mama is so fat, when she jumped in the air she got stuck. - Yo mama is so stupid, she tripped over a cordless phone. - Yo mama is so poor, when came over I stepped on a cigarette butt she said "who turned off the heat". - Yo mama is so fat when I walked around her I got lost. - Yo mama is so fat and stupid, when I said it was chilly out, she ran outside with a bowl. - Yo mama is so dumb she tried to drown a fish. - Yo mama is ugly, when she goes shopping they ask *her* for a bag. - Yo mama is so ugly, she got fired from the zoo. - You mama is so fat, when she jumped in front of my car, I swerved and ran out of gas. Happy Mothers day everybody!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After many years of philosophizing, I have decided to affirm the principle of non-contradiction... ...And deny it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is the bar at the ghost wedding set up? Boo''s on the left, Spirit''s on the right', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the watering hole, an elephant suddenly picked up a tortoise and flung it as far away as he could. A lion asked, "Why''d you do that?" The elephant said, "That''s the same one that bit me on the trunk 17 years ago last week." The lion said, "Wow. Amazing memory." The elephant said, "Sure. Turtle recall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a problem with my computer yesterday... So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over. Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. As he was walking away, I called after him, ''So, what was wrong ? He replied, ''It was an ID ten T error.'' I didn''t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, ''An, ID ten T error ? What''s that? In case I need to fix it again.'' Eric grinned .... ''Haven''t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before ? ''No,'' I replied. ''Write it down,'' he said, ''and I think you''ll figure it out.'' So I wrote down: ID10T I used to like Eric, the little bastard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Scrabble and a circle jerk have in common? It''s a great way for a family to come together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend just got an Amazon Echo. I said, "Alexa, hi, how are y--" She said, "I have a boyfriend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('wanna read a dirty joke... ;) a white horse ran through a muddy puddle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Turns out I''m allergic to alcohol ...It''s the damnedest thing. After 12 or 13 beers, I throw up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What currency do they use in outer space? Starbucks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ghost walks into a bar Bartender says sorry we don''t serve spirits here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Preston: Knock Knock! Mom: Who''s There Preston: Preston. Mom: Preston who? Preston let out a disheartening sigh as he walked away from the door, knowing his mother''s Alzheimer''s was getting worse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the psychiatrists who studied him, Josef Fritzl is an immature, violently angry and sexually perverted man who had an unhappy childhood and as a consequence behaves in a highly controlling way to everyone around him. I can''t help feeling that a lot of heartache could have been avoided if he had done the usual thing and become a PE teacher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can say I''m one of those prodigy geniuses who just don''t have any enthusiasm. All I need now is to be a genius.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not quite what she was expecting... Guy: I work with animals every day! Girl: That''s so sweet! Are you a vet or a pet shop own- Guy: I''m a butcher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A John Picks up a Hooker.. A John picks up a hooker. They''re on their way to the motel when she just can''t stop talking about how awesome her pussy is. They get to the room. She takes off her clothes. She says to the guy, "Put a finger in." He does. "Put two fingers in." He does. "Put four fingers in." He does. "Put your hand in." He does. "Put your other hand in." He does. "Now, clap." He says " I can''t." She says, "Tight, isn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Older couple An older couple is spending time up in the bedroom before turning in for the night. Hubby''s reading the paper while his wife is checking herself out in the mirror. Every few minutes, she lets out with a little- "Ooooh!" and "Awww!" Finally, the husband can''t concentrate and puts the paper down. "Whaaaat? What the hell is going on with you over there?" "Tsk... it''s just that every time I look in the mirror lately, all I see is that I''m getting older and fatter and uglier every day!", she says, pouting. "I could really use a compliment right now." The husband looks her up and down and says- "Well, there''s absolutely nothing wrong with your eyesight!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Do You Call a Twitchy Boat at the Bottom of the Sea? A nervous wreck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the show Jackass and CNN news? Suits', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently I visited my daughter. When I asked her newspaper, she said: Dad, this is the 21st century, take my IPad. What can I say ... this fly did not know what killed her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A joke for Donald Trump - what do you get when you cross Queen Elizabeth and Prince Charles? Killed in a tunnel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do tampons have strings attached to them? So the crabs can go bungee jumping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the winner of the beauty pageant for teenagers who''ve had an abortion? Little miss conception', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the gangster''s son tell his dad when he failed his exams? "Dad, they questioned me for 3 hours, but I never told them anything!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know of a guy who fucked millions of people at a time It was a whole nation he did this to. His name is Donald Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned out that my wife loves cocktails I told her that it''s growing your pubes in one direction and no one does that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference..... Between and suicide vest and a modern feminist? At least the vest achieves something when it''s triggered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 surgeons walk into a pub... ...The first claims to be the best surgeon of Texas: "the world''s best piano player lost 7 fingers in an accident. I sewed them back on and yesterday, he played a private concert for the queen of England." The second one answeres: "That''s nothing. A young man lost both arms and both legs in an accident and I sewed them back on. 2 years later, he won a gold medal at the olympic games." The third physician, who had been silent to this point says: "Amateurs! A couple of years ago, a young businessman overdosed on coke. He rode his horse in front of a train, tried to stop the train and was ripped into pieces. The only thing left was the man''s butt and the horses forelock. I patched him up and two weeks ago, this man was sworn in as President of the United States.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the first amendment in Super Mario''s constitution? Freedom of Peach', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John dies due to a car accident In heaven, he sees a wall of very large clocks. He asks the Angel "What up with all these clocks?" Angel answers "These clocks measure lies, every person has one clock assigned to them. Whenever you lie on earth, the clock ticks." The man points towards a clock and asks, "Who''s clock does this belong to?" Angel answers ''This clock belongs to Mother Teresa. She has never told a lie, so it hasn''t moved." John walks around and sees all sorts of clocks with different times on them. He reaches a room having clocks of the presidents. He notices that it doesn''t have Trump''s clock. So he asks "Where is Trump''s clock?" The Angel replies "That one is in our office, we use it as a table fan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fart Football An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says,"Seven Points." His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?" The old man replied, "It''s fart football." A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says "Touchdown, tie score." After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, "Aha. I''m ahead 14 to 7." Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, "Touchdown, tie score." Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, "Field goal, I lead 17 to 14." Now the pressure is on the old man. He refuses to get beaten by his wife, so he strains real hard. Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he''s got, and accidentally poops the bed..The wife says, "What the heck was that?" The old man says, ''Half time, switch sides"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Groundhog Day is a classic. It sure has great replay value.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks in to a hospital And says to the doctor "I have five penises". The doctor asked him how his pants fitted. "Like a glove" he replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I may look like a joke to you.... ...but I''m completely dad inside', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love? The swallow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t see anything wrong with the KKK It''s just the precursor to 4K TV', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cartographer get kicked out of map making club He had a bad latitude', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend liked puns too much. We called him a Pundit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a Nazi officer just lost his eyesight. I guess he can Nazi anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I apologize for all those things I said and did... I was on a lot of drugs back then. Doctor siad it wasn''t enough, so he gave me more drugs. Now I''m better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a snowman who trades sex for money? A Frostitute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was afraid that I had stepped on my child''s hamster this morning... ... but laughed when I double checked. I had just tripped on a little puddle of blood and fur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Evolutionists found the first humans were a Jewish male, a Georgian male and a Russian female... Their names were Arron Gutan, Chimpanidze and Gavrila...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Hitler sneeze? **a-jew* *', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an underpowered motorbike and an overused vagina? One''s a laggy scooter, and the other''s a slaggy cooter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Perry the pea pod greet his mate Kevin the corn kernel? Morn''in cob.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t understand why they say ignorance is bliss Trump supporters always seem so unhappy and angry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a carrot''s favorite type of dancing? Tap root dancing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a 14 year old with two broken arms favorite piece of clothing? Oedipal underwear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best part about dating a homeless man? You can drop him off anywhere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Being buried... Friend 1: What scares you the most? Friend 2: Being buried... Friend 1: Why? Friend 2: I don''t want to talk about it, the thought of it scares me to death.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the favorite sex position of Git users? Revert cowgirl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best thing about an Oprah Winfrey joke? You get the joke! You get the joke! You all get the joke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mall Security pick up a lost boy... Mall Security pick up a lost boy at the shopping center. The Mall cop asks, "Who were you with?" The little boy answers, "My Granddad." The Mall cop asks, "What''s he like?" The little boy thinks for a moment and replies, "Whisky and women with big tits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bartender says, We dont serve time travelers in here. A time traveler walks into a bar...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay black man? A homiesexual.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I replaced all of the incense in the Friar''s chamber with Marijuana He''s a High priest now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a new radio system in my car the other day. The thing is great, you shout Soul, and it plays Soul. You should Rock, it starts playing Rock. The other day, some kids ran past my car, and I shouted, "FUCKING KIDS!" and it started playing Micheal Jackson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the blind Mexican only saying "no"? Because he couldn''t Si', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Asian friend got his Jewish wife pregnant. I guess "Cha Ching" wasn''t an appropriate name suggestion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple were at a divorce court just a month after getting married The judge asked the wife " Why you want divorce so soon?" Wife: " He has a problem with premature ejaculation." Husband " I''m totally fine with that, its she who finds it a problem"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump never eats russian salad... He knows what Vladmir Putin it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a company that sold miniature bibles that would fit in your wallet, but if failed. The margins were too small.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Mormon at a rave? An LDS on LSD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were preparing for a night of wild sex.. When suddenly, before it happened the husband died. The wife was devastated and left unsatisfied. She decided to cut off his penis and keep it to pleasure herself, and she stuck it on a wall, and used it almost daily. Somehow, a neighbor found out about it, removed the penis, put a hole in the wall and stuck his own in there. When the wife got home that day, she walked up to the wall with a knife and said ''honey, we''re moving houses.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the mermaid wear seashells? Because the B shells were too small and the D shells were too big.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Grasshopper walked into a bar.... A grasshopper walks into a bar and orders a beer. As the bartender sets the beer down in front of the grasshopper, he remarks, "You know, we have a cocktail named after you." The grasshopper looks surprised. "What? You have a cocktail called a Kevin?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do all gay men sound the same? Because they are Homonyms', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Giving birth isn''t as painful as being kicked in the nuts I''ve never heard a man say ''let''s do that again'' afterwards', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new exchange student from Spain came into our class. We made fun of his accent at first, but it quickly became clear he was incredibly intelligent. Everyone was surprised. No one expected the Spanish erudition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Call a girl beautiful 1,000 times and she''ll never notice. Call a girl fat once and she''ll never forget it. Because elephants never forget.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t Alpacas good in the porn idustry? Because spitters are quitters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just left an interview and they told me there''d be a drug test. I''m not worried, though. I know a lot about drugs, so it should be a pretty easy test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('KGB Agents Two KGB Agents talk: - What happened to him? - He ate bad mushrooms - Why are there beating marks on the body? - He didn''t want to eat them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had a job interview today I was in a job interview today. The interviewing manager handed me his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me." So I put the laptop under my arm, walked out of the building, and went home. Eventually he called my mobile and said, "Bring it back here right now!" I said, "$200 and it''s yours." Didn''t get the job btw...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the stoner name his daughter? Mary Joanna', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Crayola truck just got robbed for profit We''re currently searching for the purple traders', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The U.S., the U.K, Germany and France all start a new game of Dungeons and Dragons in 2017. What''s the first action the U.S. makes? A Constitution saving throw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t know whether to use ser or estar.... I didn''t expect the Spanish indecision', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the college student call noodles in a kettle? Spaghe-tea, and crippling tuition costs mixed with overpriced parking fees and the text book industry scam charging him 150 fucking dollars for an edition that is just two words longer than the previous one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#NotMyGroundhog Cold weather triggers me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a loud, mentally disabled dog? A sub-ruffer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the woman who backed into an airplane? Disaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix sodium hydroxide with hydrochloric acid? Water, and /r/leagueoflegends', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Jewish brothers are walking down the street. They pass a Protestant church whose sign read "Convert to Christianity, Receive $2000". One of the brothers said "I''m going in there to check this out" His brother says "You can''t possibly be thinking about converting to Christianity! This is your people this is your heritage!" his brother says "No no, I''m just going to see why they''re doing it" After two hours he comes out of the church and says to his brother "I have converted to Christianity, I believe that Jesus is the true lord and savior of humanity and that he will return to earth to bless us and take us to heaven for an eternity of everlasting bliss". His brother says "Well what about the $2000?" He says "What is it with you people and money?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a girl sleeps around, she gets called easy... But when **I** do it, all I get is crabs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump has been looking smaller and smaller lately. He''s on the low-fact diet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the joke about the man with a micropenis? He had a micropenis. That''s the joke. Short, isn''t it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lesbian goes to the gynaecologist... He shines his pen torch and has a decent look "Crikey, it''s extremely clean in here, Mrs", she smiles and replies "It bloody well should be. I get a woman in three times a week"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to see Don Quixote at the theater yesterday and there was a short break in the middle of the play. We didn''t know it would happen, no one expected the Spanish intermission.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to make scrambled eggs Step 1: Find omelette recipe Step 2: Follow omelette recipe until folding step Step 3: Try to fold the omelette in the pan Step 4: Fuck it up because how the fuck do you even do that Step 5: Enjoy scrambled eggs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knew an Indian who drank so much tea that he died in his tea pee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of 5 guys were sitting around and talking. A group of 5 guys were sitting around and talking. Guy #1: People who date both guys and girls are gross. They are terrible people. Guy #2: Yeah, none of them are good. Guy #3: If there is anyone here that thinks they arent the worst, you can leave. Guy #4: Wow you look mad, Guy #5, are you one of those bad gay types? Guy #5, walking out the door: No, good bi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wow, Donald Trump is President. I haven''t seen Democrats this mad since.... ...slavery was outlawed and the desegregation of public schools!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not addicted to cocaine I just like the way it smells.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four professionals are interviewing for a math-intensive position in a company The shortlist of applicants includes a mathematician, a physicist, an engineer, and an accountant. To begin each interview, the representative from HR poses a simple math problem to warm up the candidates. What is 45+18? The mathematician immediately responds "63". The physicist responds "63, plus or minus 10%". The engineer thinks for a moment and responds "63, but for safety, let''s call it 70". The accountant shuts the door, checks over his shoulder, leans in close to the desk, and whispers "*how much do you want it to be?*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a rock musician and a jazz musician? A rock musician plays 3 chords for 20,000 people, and a jazz musician plays 20,000 chords for 3 people', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand? So she can moan with the other!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Jewish people have circumcised penises? Because they''re 20% off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Muslim walrus? A halalrus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(read in vampire voice) Do you know what is ironic about a vampire penis? You, suck it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best way to run Meincraft on a Windows computer? By using DOS-Fuhrer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bartender says "Hey! We don''t serve faster-than-light particles here!" A tachyon flies into a bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do farmers get the party started? They turnip the beets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a piece of corn all by itself? A Unicorn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Puxatony Phil has seen his shadow... burned permanetly into a stone wall. He''s predicted a nuclear winter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Neil Gorsuch say when asked why he ruled against Roe v Wade? Not my precedent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate grammar Nazis But I love the alt-write. I''ll be here until I start yesterday''s hw', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Saw a midget carrying a television the other day I asked him if he need any help carrying the television. He told me to fuck off and said its an ipad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I really don''t like punchlines They hurt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a female to male surgery? addadicktome', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s rude to call someone a fob You just assumed they understand English', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do jews celebrate Christmas? By installing a parking meter on the roof.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs? A condescending con descending', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got fired from my job at Whole Foods They caught me selling half foods!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Squaring numbers is just like girls If they''re under 13, just do them in your head', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many vampires does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It depends if you Count Dracula.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst part of having sex with a 4 year old? Getting the blood out of the clown costume can be such a bitch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend and I were about to go for a late night walk. Her dad said, "Don''t forget to wrap up." I said, "Don''t be silly, she''s on the pill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you want to satisfy your hardcore food fetish? Buy my new book: 50 Shades of Grey Poupon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Americans watch Lord of the Rings? They don''t have the Two Towers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL Donald Trump played Football when he was in college. He played de fence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man and his date were parked... ... on a back road some distance from town. They were about to have sex when the girl stopped. I really should have mentioned this earlier, but Im actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex. The man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing. After a cigarette, the man just sat in the drivers seat looking out the window. Why arent we going anywhere? asked the girl. Well, I should have mentioned this before, but Im actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25&', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to a radio report, a middle school in Oregon was faced with a unique problem. A number of girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Finally, the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it was to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance guy to clean one of the mirrors. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it into the toilet and then cleaned the mirror. Since then there have been no lip prints on the mirror.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told an inmate to have a safe drive home. I''m a corrections officer, getting ready to head out at shift change: Inmate: "drive home safe" Me: "yeah you too..." Me: (thinking "oops, ouch") Coworker: "Muahahaha" Inmate: (hops into his imaginary car and shuffles to his cell making farting engine noises, screeches the brakes, steps out of his car and into his cell. Pokes his head out) "Made it home safe dad" Me and my coworker burst out laughing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Viking leaders pleasure? Leif Blower', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once bought condoms the day before a girl I was dating broke up with me. I suffer from premature emasculation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today is a ballerinas favorite day... Its 2-2', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never knew my ex wanted me back so much. In fact, today he called me "white trash" because he just had to take me out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the same about the force and herpes? They will be with you, always.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If sneezing means someone''s thinking about you... I guess that explains why I never got sick before', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats clean and dirty at the same time? A single guy just out of the shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do magicians never perform tricks behind windows? Because they are a pane to do tricks behind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a singing computer? A-Dell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there so many bakeries in the Deep South ? Because all the people down there are inbred', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MOMMY MOMMY, I DONT WANT TO VISIT GRAMPA! Shut up and keep digging...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know who''s a real lady killer? David Berkowitz (aka Son of Sam)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a dog get after going to college? A pedigree.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tourettes I took my wife to the doctors today to sort out her tourettes. Turns out she doesnt have it, I actually am a cunt and she really does want me to fuck off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde woman walks into a library Walks up to the front counter, sees the attendant and says ''Hello there, I''ll have a burger and a large fries please'' The attendant, politely responds ''I''m sorry love, but this is actually a library'' Mortified and red faced the blonde lady looks around and whispers back ''I''m so sorry, I''ll have a burger and large fries please''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Viagra Viagra should be classified as a hard drug.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the Latin word for Hipster? *Pretentious Pretentious*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men find a genies lamp. After a horrific plane crash three men end up on a desserted island. An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German. While searching for shelter, they discover a genies lamp. The Frenchman grabs it and rubs it......poof the genie appears and grants them each one wish. The Frenchman speaks up first "I want all my people togeather, every French speaking person to be in our own beautiful island. We can enjoy the arts, drink wine and smoke in church." Instantly the Frenchman disappeared. The German was very intrigued and asked for the same, "I want all my people togeather on an island, we can drink beer and eat bratwurst. Poof he disappeared. The genie asked the Englishman if he wanted the same. "Are all the French and Germans really isolated on their own islands." The genie confirms they were. " Shit then I''m good, does this place gave wifi?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of tea is sometimes hard to swallow ? Reality .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother keeps asking me when I am going to get married And my answer is always the same, "I''m sorry, mom, but I''m afraid you will not live until that moment. You have cancer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde get into a car accident? She thought "dodge" and "ram" were instructions', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Liberals declared leukemia to be racist There''s too many white cells.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We were having a family dinner when my grandma started telling one of her old holocaust survival stories I said, "Stop it, grandma, this is not germane right now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was one of Gregory Mendel''s conclusions Death.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a con artist with a degree in psycology? Sigmund Fraud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl, are you a popular work of fiction? "Because I want to self-insert myself into you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is quite selfish in the bedroom I gave her an orgasm last night and she spat it back in my face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They had to stop the leprosy hockey game Due to a face-off in the corner. Thank you, thank you, I''ll be here all week, don''t forget to tip your waitress', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Israeli doctor says... An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My waifu is the square root of -100 She''s a perfect 10, but imaginary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just turned on nickelodeon and saw bob the builder building a wall... ... to keep Dora from exploring.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What line should we wait in for food? "Pho queue"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t date coworkers... Not for lack of trying...it just hasn''t worked out so far.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a strange movie called "Being Vladimir Putin." It''s about a Russian dictator who discovers a secret door in the Kremlin that magically leads up the asshole of Donald Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the Tibetan girl trust her boyfriend? Himalayan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the last thing you want to hear when you''re blowing Willie Nelson? "So...I''m not actually Willie Nelson."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of people Those who recycle binary jokes, and those who recycle other jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abortion jokes are really shallow... They always fail to deliver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dyslexic person... Walks into a bra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Trump become president?!?! Asks the country getting its weather forecast from a groundhog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A penguin goes to the mechanic A penguin''s car breaks down and he takes the car to the mechanic. The mechanic tells him to come back in an hour. The penguin goes wandering around town and he stumbles upon an ice cream store. He buys some ice cream and goes back to the mechanic. The mechanic says "It looks like you blew a seal." The penguin responds "No, no, its just ice cream."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Iran bans Americans from traveling there. Won''t beheading there anymore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Elephants weigh more than rats. weigh more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had bad breath this morning So I exSpeaminted with Wrigleys gum.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Trump says, "Fuck You" to you, don''t be angry... because rather being angry, you need to be worried. He is a man of his words, so run and hide if you can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most literary vegetable? A punion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant woman and husband attend a pregnancy class together. The doctor is explaining to the class how to make pregnancy and delivery easier on the couples. He goes on to explain how it''s very beneficial to walk during the pregnancy, as it is good for exercise and such. The doctor explains to the husbands they should encourage it by accompanying them on their walks. A slow pace and frequent stops is recommended, as well as walking on grass or other softer surfaces. After the doctor finishes he asks for questions and one husband raises his hand. The husband says "would it be ok for her to carry the clubs too?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went up to this really cute homeless girl and asked if I could take her home She looked ecstatic until I picked up her box and started walking away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the nose in the middle of the face? Its the scenter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are black people so good at basketball? because it''s all about running, shooting, and stealing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Samurai so easy to kill? There are only chinks in the armor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the Mexicans favourite game? Borderlands', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('America in the 1930s be like: I have crippling depression.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A partially deaf guy and his wife are having a baby. The wife has a fairly hard labor, there were a few complications but all was well and now have a beautiful baby girl. The husband turns to the doctor and asks, "So doc, when can we..uhh..be intimate again?" The doctor smiles and tells the man, "About 6 to 8 weeks." The man loses his shit and yells, "68 WEEKS!" **Disclaimer:** This is a totally true story that happened to my loving mother and father who tell this story every chance they get.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you call a Fay in black robes? It is a Faygoth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is E.T. short for? He has really small legs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stop with all the Chuck Norris jokes It''s not like he''s god, he''s just an actor who played a character. If he is indeed a god, I dare him to appear in my house and do his worsdhrgusfjdfhcyzyhuxujxxuxuxz448"7"7$7**dufnfjufkfickggbnffu37jkvocififfiesduducififiiewskofuayaudofoifdud2645udux3kfkfidiiif', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so horny. I need to go home and pound my wife ...in the head with a skillet, so she can''t hear me and the girl I brought home having sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much does high speed internet cost in Australia? NINE-HUNDRED DOLLARYDOOS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do marxists only drink herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare line', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hi there, I''m here for Club Paradox Actually this is Oxymoron Club. "Ok, same difference." looks at group Oh, this guy is good.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the black guy have cocaine sprinkled on him? The cops were out of bullets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was changing the 15 fuses at the Buzzfeed HQ building Number 5 shocked me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So the British government have just produced a white paper detailing their plan of leaving the EU Well, they weren''t about to use black or brown paper now were they?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Cuban that immagrated to Spain? Spain-ish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and my dad have been butting heads... ... since before I was born', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the vampire turned poet? He went from _bat_ ... to __verse__!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a female magician? An assistant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a black man... I saw a black man in Nikes running down the street carrying a 55" TV and I thought to myself, "Is that mine?" Then I remembered that mine wears Reebok.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My penis was in the Guinness book of world records... Until the librarian screamed at me to take it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muslims in America [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of French rabbits running backwards? A retreating hare line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the space between a woman''s breasts and her hips called a waist? 18+ Why is the space between a woman''s breasts and her hips called a waist? Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are feminists so good at math? Theyre skilled at triggernometry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police arrested two kids yesterday One was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m like a bull in a China Shop... If "China Shop" is what you call your mom. [OC]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst part about time travelling jokes? Punchline? Never heard of him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When someone asks why you don''t have muscles "My muscles are just like John Cena. You can''t see me"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Didn''t know groundhogs are part Didn''t know groundhogs are part of the Stark family . They always think Winter is coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dog has been acting up lately... I think it''s fed up with it''s gender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Presidents does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. He''s too busy screwing his daughter in the oval office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs... Because they always take things literally.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta last night... Now it''s a Ford Focus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The NATO battleplan began to fall apart just as the battle started. All the nations troops were in the planned positions. However what no one expected was the Spanish in-position.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pornhub now makes you view an ad before you can watch your video. Is this what the world is coming to?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the guitar player get arrested? For fingering a minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a joke? So did Helen Keller.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stringed Bikini''s Stringed Bikini''s are making our beaches see-shores.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked Yoda for his opinion of the play Les Miserables "Lame is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a baby horse, wrapped in aluminum, who was stopped from committing his dastardly plan? A Foiled Foil Foal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the biggest similarity between feminists and linebackers? Everything that happens to them is offensive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk guy walks into a bus and sits next to a very ugly lady. The drunk guy stares at her and says: -Shit, you are the ugliest woman I''ve ever seen in my life. The lady looks back at him and says: What about you? You are wasted and you look disgusting! The drunk guy replies: -That''s true, but i''ll be fine tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus walks into a restaurant with his Apostles... and says to the host, "Table for 26 please". The host, confused said, "but Jesus, it''s just you and your 12 Apostles, that only makes 13". To this Jesus replied, "Yeah, but we''re only going to sit on one side of the table."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I became a proud dad today! My son is actually 4 but he was a boring little cunt for the first 3 years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a sadist and a masochist? One practices the golden rule.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL short people experience an wage gap comparable to that of blacks They should really rise up against it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? Your mum can''t take a joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if you''re best friend is gay? If his dick tastes like shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A step-by-step guide of how to tell if your girlfriend is cold: 1) She won''t stop fucking telling you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last night, my wife asked me to make her "feel like a woman" I took off my shirt, and told her to iron it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the man remember where he left his glasses? It was all a blur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not anti Semitic I''m anti semantic I can''t stand a wordy Jew', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a good secretary and a great secretary? A good one says, "*Good morning.*" A great one says, "*It''s morning.*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of people in the world... .. those who understand binary, and those who get laid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My buddy was watching a video of an NFL player involved in domestic violence. I asked, "What position did he play?" He answered..... Kicker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Frenchmen have a hard time counting to four? Because there''s a tree in the way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Melania and Ivanka were having a conversation in the rose garden. Melania asked Ivanka if she could go into the house and grab something her. "I''m going to need a few secret service agents for that" replied Ivanka. Melania nods her approval. After 15 minutes, Ivanka and the agents are struggling out the door trying to balance this huge beautiful light fixture. Melania is now very irritated and angrily yells out "I can''t take this anymore! Where''s my husband!? What do I need a chandelier for!? I asked you to bring out that broken charlatan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said ''''may contain nuts.'''' Well, YES! That''s what I bought the buggers for! You''d be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the toughest commandment for IV drug users to follow? Don''t take God''s name in vein.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Germans call a broken toilet? A scheizer geyzer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('11 a.m. is always such a hard time for me I should probably stop taking Viagara with breakfast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Jewish person''s favourite martial arts? Judo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What group of limbed people is the worst at karate The deaf', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde''s Brain Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? A: Pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Tommy asks his mom if he can have some animal crackers Little Tommy asks his mom if he can have some animal crackers. His mom gives him a box of crackers and tells him he can have a few. His mom leaves and comes back in a few minutes finding all of the crackers on the floor with Tommy looking through them. His mother asks "What are you doing Tommy?" Tommy replies "It said don''t eat if the seal was already broken. But I can''t find a seal!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you combine an organ and jam? A hearty breakfast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Earbuds so today one of my friend was wearing ear buds and im like: YOU MAY HAVE EAR BUDS, BUT I GOT MY BUDS EAR! and i grabbed my friends ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wearing a turban walks into a doctor''s office... and the doctor says "What''s wrong with you?", to which the man replies "Doctor, can''t you see I''m Sikh?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you don''t want your grades to sink like the titanic..... You should try to keep them above C level', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used my Google Rewards on a video of Caitlyn Jenner It was worth the transaction', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the doctor''s office with a black eye... The doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The man says, "Well doctor, you''re not going to believe this, but this happened at church! The pastor asked us all to stand, and when we did I noticed the woman in front of me had a wedgie. So naturally, I reached forward and pulled her dress out for her, but then she turned around and punched me in the eye! Unbelievable..." The doctor then prescribed some painkillers and sent the man on his way. One week later, the man returns to the doctor with another black eye. "What happened this time?!" the doctor exclaims. "Well doctor, you''re not going to believe me, but this happened at church again! The pastor asked us all to stand, and wouldn''t you know, the same woman in front of me had another wedgie! The man next to me reached forward and pulled her dress out for her, but I knew she didn''t like that, so I reached up and tucked it back in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know an NP-Complete joke but once you''ve heard one you''ve heard them all', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is America''s favorite drink? Liber-Tea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time to train for my favourite winter sport. Extreme Hibernation....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about the cow that jumped over the barbed wire fence? It was an "udder" disaster!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some say laughter is the best medicine. I prefer sedatives.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I invented a sandal for people with one leg. It was a flop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2020 Olympic High Jump Results: Gold- Mexico Silver- Mexico Bronze- Mexico', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a truthful Native American? Pocahonest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guess what Chicken butt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a golf ball and a G-spot? Guys will actually look for the golf ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only interview you can never fuck up is the exit interview. No HR is going to say "Sorry. You''re rejected. You''ll have to continue working with us till your last breath."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the sign on an out of business brothel say? Beat it. We''re closed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had the strangest sexual encounter of my life last night "Had the strangest sexual encounter of my life last night," Bill said to Frank. "A blind call girl" "Really?" said Frank. "Yeah. You gotta hand it to her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Giant Pandas are the least racist animal... They''re Black, White and Asian!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is it time for bed at Michael Jackson''s house? When the big hand touches the little hand. Woooo Shamone!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus and Moses go fishing... While in line at the canoe rental place Moses looks over at Jesus and asked him, "Cant you walk on water? Why do we need a canoe?" Jesus remembers his ability and tries to walk across the river but falls knee deep in the water. Moses then says, "Maybe you need to get a running head start. Try over there on the dock." Jesus gets a running head start but ends up falling into the river once again. He is perplexed as to why this is not working. Moses then says, "Wait Jesus, did you have holes in your feet last time you did this?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Donald Trump and Kanye West? 4 years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alt-Right does nothing for our Word Ctrl-Right, though, moves us to a whole new Word. Obligatory I''m here all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the Second World War, a Briton,and a Pole were captured by the Germans During the Second World War, a Briton,and a Pole were captured by the Germans. Each man was sentenced to stand before a firing squad.The Briton was the first to be put again the wall. Standing back, the German officer said, "Ready, aim- At which point the Briton interrupted by shouting "Earthquake!" The firing squad ran for cover, and the Briton escaped Regrouping, the Germans put the Frenchman against the wall. Once again the oberst said,Ready, aim "Flood!" Taking a leaf from the Briton''s book, the Frenchman yelled. Once again the Germans panicked, and the prisoner escaped Finally the Polish resistance fighter faced the guns, ready to repeat the ploy of his pre-decessors. The oberst said, "Ready, aim- "Fire!" hollered the Pole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What cereal does President Trump stockpile at the White House? Cheerios...Made for little hands!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pig with no legs? Ground Hog! Happy Groundhog''s Day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife told me if I kept making puns about my dark yellow glove then she''d leave me. I told her I could see where she was coming from, even I found it annoying I mustard mitt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a man and a wife were walking.... The wife sees a dog licking itself and whispers to her husband "I wish I could get down like that." The husband replies "I suggest you ask if you can pet em first"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a physicist''s preferred city of residence? Velo City.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of faucet is only Cold? Farrah', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between hemophilia and virginity? None. One prick, and it''s all over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most common blood type in Taiwan? Taipei', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pregnant - Beyonce Pregnant with twins - Beytwice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My baby finally spoke her first words She said "Google Lady Gaga"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy kills a butterfly A little boy kills a butterfly. Dad says, "No butter for one week!" The little boy kills a honeybee. Dad says, "No honey for one week!" Mom kills a cockroach. The little boy turns to his dad and says, "Are you gonna tell her or should i do it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time flies like an arrow fruit flies like a banana', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are magicians lousy reporters? They always ask trick questions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a chemistry joke repost... All the original ones Argon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best pattern for a banker''s suit? Checks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Amish girl keep getting pregnant? Too many mennonite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Groundhog just saw a Muslim outside Gobblers Knob. Predicting six more months of travel ban', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats lopsided and provocative? A stripper who had a stroke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone asked me "What''s the longest time you ever went without sex? " 16 years. Once. When I was young.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the piece of chalk cross the road? There was treasure buried underneath.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Muslims were banned? How many Muslims were banned? Allah them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Onions. I remember crying when my dad chopped onions. Onions was a good dog. I miss him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a joke about Sodium? Na Want to hear a joke about Sodium Hypobromite? NaBrO', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eyes Specialist Doctor: Hello, did you come to see me with an eye problem? Patient: Wow, yes, how can you tell? Doctor: Because you came in through the window instead of the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do say farewell to a cat? You ask him to have a mice day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the math book sad? It had lots of problems. [My little brother told me this earlier.]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is alot like a Dragon Ball Z villain He has yet to sign his final form! Bahahaahaaa I love coffee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Muslim walks into a gay bar And says "shots for everyone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Groundhog sees Trumps shadow. . . Four more years of Nuclear Winter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('100m Dash A girl says to her friend "The last time I had sex was like the 100 meter dash" Her friend says "What, over in 6 seconds?" "No, with 8 black men and a gun."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Date night I was on a date with a girl last night and the conversation started to get steamy. She was holding my hand and I said; "just by using these fingers I could make you scream." Seductively she leant forward and purred "well go on then, show me..." So I poked her in the eye!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the company that makes wooden counters say to their client? "We stand behind our product"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump cured me... of impostor syndrome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just went to my first biweekly Screw Trump party I''m gonna try his gays only one next week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men are out hunting when one of them suddenly drops dead Two men are out hunting when one of them suddenly drops dead. He calls 911 immediately. The operator says "Can I help you sir?" The man replies "I think my friend is dead! Get an ambulance! What should I do?" The operator replies "Okay, calm down sir. First we have to make sure he is dead." There is silence, then a gun shot, then the man comes back on "Okay, what now?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bean get released from the mental asylum? It wasn''t a nut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: "Mom, Dad, I am gay...." Mom: Stares at Dad Dad: Clenches fist Mom: "Don''t!" Dad: Sweats Profusely Mom: ... Dad: "HI GAY, I''M DAD"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they''re stuck up bitches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my agent what time I should arrive to be paid for the Elvis impersonation gig. He said it''s 1 for the money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which monkey can fly? A hot air baboon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump''s favorite cuisine Canadian? Because he loves to have a mouthful of Poutine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the dogs understand each other. Because they didn''t have any common scents. Ha ha ha... I''ll see myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of penis do Chinese mice have? Mousey dongs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 3999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: Donald Trump elected 45th President of the United States! I know this already came out, but I am just now believing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told the judge "I discovered my wife in bed with Danny!" He said "No you didn''t! Danny already knew she was there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Having a foot long penis would be a real pain in the ass But not for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While walking through the mall I spotted the Islamic Book Store and I went in. The clerk asked me, "can I help you?" I said, "yes, can you tell me where I can find Donald Trump''s book on refugees?" He turned beet red and said, "eat shit, get the fuck out and stay out." I said, "yes, that''s the one, now where is it located?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dentist reminded me of my wife''s sensitive gag reflex My dentist reminded me of my wife''s sensitive gag reflex. We laughed & laughed. Then I remembered that my wife & I have different dentists', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are your chances of getting laid by a super religious female? Nun', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today needs to be Lobster or steak day... Because this groundhog tastes like crap!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An atheist, dyslexic insomniac spends all his nights wondering About the existence of dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Aussie say when his friend ran out of TP? Bidet mate!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know they make a divorcee Barbie now? She comes with all of Ken''s stuff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are you up at 6am despite wanting more sleep? SIR I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sir Mix-A-Lot runs in 2020. He''ll grab her by the tushy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been secretly tossing pears at my neighbor for a couple weeks now I can hear him talking to his wife about government drones trying to drive him crazy, but he''s just pear annoyed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cat can read the hands of a clock to know when it''s nap time. It''s nap time when the hours-hand is shorter than the minutes-hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the name of a motorist fan in the Netherlands? Bus van Truck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thank god I wasn''t born in China... I don''t even speak Chinese!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The groundhog saw his shadow. Four more years of suck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mercury asked the Sun what he was. The Sun said: I''m a motherfucking star boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told my friend she couldn''t take critism She told me to go to hell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the warring religious sects say to each other after they made peace? "Good Shiite." "See you Sunni."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John and Nancy were married for 40 years and decided they wanted to renew their vows and planned a second wedding... They were discussing the details with their friends. Nancy wasn''t going to wear a traditional bridal gown and she started describing the dress she was planning to wear. One of her friends asked what color shoes she had to go with the dress. Nancy replied, "Silver." At that point, her husband chimed in, "Yep, silver...to match her hair." Shooting a glaring look at John''s bald spot, Nancy''s friend said, "So, John, I guess you are going barefoot then."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As I was approaching my driveway, I saw a big black man running away with a TV in his hands and I wondered if it was mine. Upon entering my house, I was relieved to see that mine was at home polishing my shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my cat won for "Best Feline Butt", we expected to get a small plaque. But it wasn''t. It was a huge catasstrophy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a #2 pencil. (With thanks from my dad)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Friar, a Rabbi, and a Buddhist Monk Pray for the Dictator Three representatives of three different faiths come to mourn the dictator, who was shot at range. The Christian friar exclaimed: -Ave Maria! May the worthy pass into the afterlife. The Rabbi exclaimed: -By Moses! Let there be light at the end of the tunnel. Finally, the Buddhist exclaimed: -By Buddha! Prepare for Nirvana. Let his soul be as pure as his heart. A silence followed. The friar eventually leaned over to the monk and whispered: -He was shot in the heart. Did the news not reach you in time for the prayer? whereupon the monk replied: -Dear brother, it was premeditated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pet snake just lays around and won''t move I think he''s suffering from a reptile dysfunction', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about fouls in Soccer? You''ll get a kick out of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They call my penis the truth.... The truth can be a real dick sometimes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was stunned last night when my wife told me I was too wrapped up in myself.... When did I get a wife?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde joke A blonde is trying to hammer down a pin into a wall, she has the flat end to the wall and is hammering the pointy end. She gets really pissed as it clearly isn''t working. Her friend comes in and asks whats wrong. "Well, this pin just work! It''s not piercing this wall!" she says. Her friend looks at her and says " You idiot, You got the wrong pin! That pin is clearly for the wall on the oppsite side!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just after my wife had given birth, I asked the doctor, "How soon do you think we''ll be able to have sex?" He winked at me and said, "I''m off duty in ten minutes - meet me in the car park."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s okay to laugh during sex but just don''t point.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the US, there is house theft every 7 seconds Doesn''t that mean walls should be built around houses?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My company got bought out by a Madrid based firm today. Really blind-sided everyone. Nobody expected the Spanish Acquisition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Linux user''s favorite game? sudo ku EDIT: First post with 100+ upvotes. Thanks all you people :D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One more for the road. Abu Al Abid went to USA for the first time, He opened a furniture shop & a lingerie shop. In 6 months.... he made a good business. . He sends an email to his wife saying: Please rush, pack up & come to USA, I sold 100 mattresses and 5000 panties. I made $100,000. She replies: It is better that you close your shop and come back fast. With 1 mattress & with no panties I made $300,000.. ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An unmarried couple start a jazz band. What would they call it? Premarital sax', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a constipated detective? No shit Sherlock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday an Iraqi Imam made history when he said someone in Iraq had told a lie. It was the first time a Trump supporter accepted at face value a statement form an Imam without feeling the need to reach for a gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is your FAVORITE pun? Mine is, "Dogs Can''t Operate a MRI Machine......but Catscan"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what do you call the god of melting ice? Thaw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? It''s okay, he worked it out with a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Am I the first man you have ever loved? he said. "Of course," she answered "Why do men always ask the same question?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a potato that becomes US President and silences the news, silences government agencies, silences government funded science and ends international treaties? A dic-tater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The light at the end of the tunnel, Are the front lights of a train.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('my wife accused me of being immature. I told her to get out of my fort.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve just moved into a six bedroom house with three acres of land. Don''t tell the owners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Youre one in a million China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if youre a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do economists exist? So accountants have someone to laugh at.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hunting Two guys are out hunting in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesnt appear to be breathing, his eyes are glazed over. The other man pulls out his phone with trembling fingers and calls 911. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Please stay calm. I will help you. First of all, let''s make sure he''s dead." Theres a silence, then a gun shot. The guy gets back on the phone and says "OK, now what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Russian guy in a Racecar? Snowspeed xD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy: We need to stop testing our products on animals. Boss: Why? Shampoo companies do it all the time. Guy: Ya but we make dildos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to work at a bra factory but it went bust.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman held a seance... ...for her dead husband who , during his life, was a waiter in an high end swanky restaurant. The room was lit up with candles and the medium went into the trance. After few minutes the table started shaking. "Phil? Is that you?" she asked "talk to me, Phil." "No!" replied a ghostly voice "It''s not my table!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the late night train.... On a late night train, I was alone in a carriage, this pretty young thing boards. I stared at her. She snapped "what are you looking at? " I sighed. "6 to 8 years if someone else gets in this carriage."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Lynyrd Skynyrd''s biggest hit? The ground. Follow-up line: It was a Buddy Holly cover.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Chinese woman with no legs? Dragon lips', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know? Type O Blood was actually meant to be Type Zero blood, due to the lack of glycoproteins in the red blood cells. It was misread and is now called Type O blood. I guess you could call it a typo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey Honey! "Today, I went out and a saw a woman that looked identical to you, just fatter!" "Well, did you find her attractive?" "Shit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Donald Trump''s least favourite rock band? Foreigner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the advantage of living in Switzerland? Well, its flag is a big plus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a mental hospital A bloke is visiting his mother in a mental hopsital when in the same room he comes across a guy moving his arms around and making beeping noises. "Excuse me", he asks him. "What on earth are you doing?" "I''m driving my car!, says the guy excitedly. "Beep beep!" "You fucking nutbar, you''re not in a car, you''re in a mental hospital!" A voice comes from the bed opposite. "Mate, shut the fuck up will you, he''s giving me twenty quid a day to wash the cunt."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you hear pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because their P is silent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife always asks me: if she dies, will I remarry? And I say don''t be silly honey... I never make the same mistake twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the porcupines say when they kissed? Ouch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a truckload of sand and a truckload of babies? You can''t unload sand with a pitchfork', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the SI Unit for measuring Light''s Weight? Hologram.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife walks in on her husband, in bed with another woman. "Helen, is that you?", says the husband surprised. He turns to the woman next to him. "Then who is this?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mechanic thinks i''m in denial over my brake fluid leak. But he''s wrong; I can stop any time i want.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Barbie on fire? A Barbecue! Be gentle. First post. And I remember making this up on a long car ride when I was just 4:)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rucksacks are some of the most trustworthy things you''ll ever own I mean, they''ve always got your back amirite', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a women who cant make a sandwich? Single', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You already know the punchline. What is the worst part about time travelling jokes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Kind Of Jam Would You Not Like On Your Bread? A Traffic Jam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t the sun go to college? Because it already has 28 million degrees', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a doll and a baby? You can''t paint with a doll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did George W. Bush cross the road? To ask his dad how to run the presidency.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: So do you like guys with low self esteem? Girl: Of course, yes, I do Me: Please don''t lie to make me feel better', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the sailor think his wife was cheating on him? Because his boat was filled with seamen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Trump so keen to stay with the queen in the UK? He heard she has golden bathrooms and can''t wait to try out the showers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage is like smoking... we believed they are good at first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t women have dirty minds? Because they''re constantly changing them...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So if Trump doesn''t like conversations with Turnbull and Australians don''t like conversations with Turnbull, is Turnbull... ... Malcolm in the middle?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three women are in a bar talking about how loose they are... One fits a hot dog in. The next fits a cucumber in. The last one slides down the barstool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cerebral Necrophelia Gives new meaning to the expression "I fucked her brains out"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To all these people telling America n Americans to go fuck themselves I think they already took care of that in November!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My secretary reminds me of my wife. I was unbuttoning her blouse at lunch today when she said, "remember, you have a wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winter is coming. Can I watch?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the feminist say before shooting up a school? Trigger warning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the debacle at the USDA''s beauty pageant? They crowned a Miss Steak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much is a pound of brains worth? What''s the cost of a pound of physicists'' brains? About $10.00 What about a pound of chemists'' brains? Oh.... Around $100.00. Okay, so, what about a pound of philosophers'' brains? $1,000,000.00. What? Seriously? Why? Oh, well, just think of how many philosophers you''d have to kill to get a pound of brains out of them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump get''s his wall. (long) Trump, A Canadian and a Mexican, end up on a deserted island. While looking for supplies to survive Trump finds a Lantern, seeing the goldish colour of the lamp Trump rubs it. Summoning a Genie; The Genie announces that he will grant three wishes to all that have found his Island. Trump wishes first; "I want a wall, the best wall, all along our borders 50 feet... no 2000 feet tall, it is going to be the greatest wall, we should have the best wall, the biggest wall, it should be the biggest wall in history" The Genie looks at Trump and says, Granted. The Canadian Looks at the Mexican and says, "I want to know how high the wall is, and how strong it is" The genie says "The wall is 8000 meters tall, and strong enough to hold back an ocean." The Mexican smiles looking at the Canadian. "Fill it with water"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage and Divorce The boy and the Girl: Boy: Ah, finally, I''ve waited so long. Girl: You want me to leave? Boy: No. I dare to not even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of course. Lots! Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: No! Why are you asking me? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every time I get the chance! Girl: Will you ever hit me? Boy: Are you crazy? Of course not! Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling? Now read it bottom up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does somebody want most when they''re stranded in the desert and their camel runs away? They want their camel bak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So an Indian, a Chinese, and an American are in a plane The plane starts falling because it has too much weight, so the three men decide to throw out the things they need least to reduce weight. The Indian man throws out a bowl of curry. "I have too much of this in my country." he says. The Chinese man throws out a bowl of noodles. "I have too much of this in my country." he says. The American man pushes the Indian and Chinese man out the plane. "I have too many of these in my country." he says.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know you can tell the gender of an ant by tossing it in water?! If it sinks... girl ant! If it floats... buoyant!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do melons always have big weddings? Because they cantaloupe!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Canadians say "Ay" and Mexicans say "Si"... Why don''t Americans say "B"?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a woman sleeps with a bunch of guys, she''s a slut. But if a guy does the same thing, then he''s gay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mellinials today definitely have it easier than previous generations... My grandfather had to cross the Atlantic to punch a Nazi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you ever bang construction workers? They''re excellent with man hole covers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After many years of studying at a university, Ive finally become a PhD Or Pizza Hut Deliveryman as people call it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are the cars built by communists no good? ''cause they''re constantly Stalin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nothing I do makes any sense. I''m unemployed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep redditors in suspense? I''ll tell you tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My overdramatic girlfriend came up to me, balling her eyes out and confessed to having the most painful period she''s ever had before I looked her right in the face and said "stop ovary acting"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought recently that I was being to hard on Trump and wanted to try to see things the way he does... So I stuck my head up my ass and I get it now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the the most charitable nation? A donation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that my alcoholic friend only weighs two pounds? Long story short, my bud light.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was trying to be friendly to some chick at a bar... So I offered her a tic-tac. She gets all defensive and says" are you saying my breath stinks? Is that why I needed tic-tac?" I''m like "whoa, calm down lady. If I wanted to give you something you need it would be mustache wax and a tshirt that says 1 cock at a time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to fly But gravity is such a let down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do black people only have nightmares? Because the last one who had a dream got shot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the fast gladiator that was a tumor covered in dough? He was a Roamin'' Tumor Roll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a 4-year olds birthday party once, it was kinda awkward... ...probably because I wasn''t invited...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jay Leno walks into a bar. Bartender says "Why the really long face?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy puts candy bar in shirt His dad always said to keep Twix up your sleeve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have the work ethic of an ox - If you tie a yoke to my shoulders and whip me until I move, I''m probably going to get a lot done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good part about trump being president is he will never forget toupee Sorry for the bad pun. Was off the top of my head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a magic car? A Lambor-genie!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do farmers like to have sex with sheep at the edge of a cliff? They push back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tribal men drag two criminals into the Chief''s hut... The Chief asked the first criminal, "You shall choose your punishment for your crimes! Choose!" "Death! Or Canyananga?" Criminal #1 thought: "Well, I don''t want to die..." "Canyananga!" The Chief responded, "Very well. Bring in... Canyananga." An ugly, giant and beastly black man walked in, took Criminal #1 to the hut next to them and proceeded to horrendously rape him. The Chief turned to Criminal #2 and shouted, "Choose!" Criminal #2 quickly replied in horror, "Death! Please!" "Fine..." the Chief told him, "But first... Canyananga!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got vagina in China, got some more in Singapore, got some booty in Djibouti But I got gonorrhea in Korea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a haemophobic vampire? A starving bat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you should test your fire alarm once a month... ... but it''s costing me a fortune in houses!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly man is out playing golf with a friend... An elderly man is out playing golf with a friend. During his turn, right before his swing, a funeral procession drives by along the border fence. The elderly man pauses, takes off his hat, and places it on his chest. As the procession drives along, the elderly mans friend stands just flabbergasted. Once the procession passes, the elderly man resumes setting up his swing. "Now hold on a second!" The elderly mans friend shouts, "That was quite a show of respect! I have never seen anything like it!" "Well, I had to do something." "Why''s that?" Replied the elderly mans friend. "I was married to her for 40 years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the console gamer cross the road? To render the building', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Different movie Wife comes home and whispers to her husband "let''s have sex like in the movies" The husband quickly gets undressed strips his wife, puts her in her knees, face fucks her then bends her over and sticks it in her ass then cums all over her face. As the wife is shaking and wiping the cum from her face she says "yea we sure do watch different movies"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve always preferred management over human resources I guess that''s just a personnel preference', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and red all over A penguin in a blender', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is masturbating off the side of Japanese whaling ships mandatory? it''s the only way to attract sperm whales.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife are getting their first baby scan After a few minutes of silent scanning, the couple ask the doctor if anything is wrong. The doctor replies: On a positive note, your child will never struggle to find a parking space.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bar games. Three men were sitting at a bar. They were bored of drinking so all decided to make a game of their evening pass time. They came up with a form of beer football, each taking turns chugging a beer for 6 points, burping after for 1 point, and farting for extra 2 points. The first guy chugs his beer, burps but couldn''t fart. The second guy chugs his beer, burps and let''s a loud fart rip. The third guy chugs his beer, belches the loudest thinking he would get additional points, finally he get up and hunches preparing to let out a massive fart when the second guy pulls down the third guys pants, and sticks his finger up the third guys ass yelling "I blocked the extra point!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once had an encounter with a Grizzly Its a long story, but just bear with me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am a judge for peanut beauty pageants My job is pretty nuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dead husband A detective asks a woman, "So, your husband hanged himself?" Woman replies, "Yes, that is correct." The suspicious detective continues, "But why does he have all those bruises on his head?" "The old fool used an elastic rope!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is long and hard to a blonde? Grade five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a barnyard revolt? A chicken coup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What lives at the North Pole and takes Lithium? A bi-polar bear. [OC, circa 2005]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asks his wife if he can cum in her ear She said "No, it''ll make me go deaf" To which he replied "Really, I always cum in your mouth and you never shut the fuck up".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the fire at the circus? Yeah...it was intense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a lady is ready for sexy time??? You put your hand down the front of her pants, and if it feels like you''re feeding a sugar cube to a horse, Hey buddy it''s time to crank up the Lynard Skynard!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me of this fish... My friend told me of this amazing kind of fish, he said it was impossible to catch! He said it broke the string on his rod! I''ve never seen it. I''ve fished for days and days... Nothing. You know? I''m starting to think that it''s not reel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a Lottery ticket today Sven: "Ollie I bought a Lottery ticket today." Ollie: "It looks like it has six numbers on it. 29, 4, 42, 11, 35, 36." Sven: "What are the odds?" Ollie: "29, 11, 35."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my Jews just how I like my juice From concentrate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is in a paradox He needs construction workers to build the wall, but he''s trying to deport all the construction workers I thought of this on the spot that''s why it''s bad sorry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock joke. Nazi: Knock Knock. Polan: Who''s there? Nazi: Nazi. Polan: Nazi wh.. Nazi: BLITZKRIEG!!! I thought I had heard this somewhere but after extensive reaserch I came to the conclusion i may have made this up myself. If anyone finds a source for this feel free to post it in the comments.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We''ve had a horrible winter this year. It was so cold, lawyers were walking around with their hand is their *own* pockets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After years of reflection I''ve decided to stop selling mirrors', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between horses and women? Horses shoes are practical', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate when people ask me what I''m going to be doing in 3 years Like come on guys, I don''t have 2020 vision!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the last Wolverine movie is a cross country chase... then why isn''t it called Logan''s Run?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You go to the bathroom Russian. You come out American. What are you while you''re in the bathroom? European.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the kidnapping at the elementary school? He''s awake now!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NSFW My SO asked me why I always make terrible puns and dad jokes I told her, "it''s just gentle ribbing, you know, for your pleasure"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken always came in another box.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest? A suicide vest gets something accomplished when triggered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say what you will about Donald Trump his secretaries and stuff think he is a greatest president ever Can''t complain!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Porsche do? Ellen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many police officers does it take to push a black man down the stairs? None. "He fell".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall? Because he had a miserable summer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the roman fighter who ate his mother in law? Terrible indigestion but he was gladiator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross a black man with an octopus? A mean cotton-picking machine!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teen is arrested for shoplifting The police call his father who immediately arrives at the police station where he is detained. As soon as he arrives, the police tell him, Police: "Sir, your son was arrested for shoplifting in the area." The father, visibly taken aback, clenches his fists. Sweating, and unable to contain himself, he breathes: "Shop lifting?! I always knew you could bench, son!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man? Then he learned how to make friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So Donald Trump signs an Executive Order reviving the Dakota Pipeline ... He says "Look at this Italian Stripper Dakota Pipilini ... laid by 100 men in 6 months!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an attractive date and a not attractive date? His bank account.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do engineers make horrible parents? Because they''re taught to neglect everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a job interview and being hired? You can tell them you''re lazy once you are hired. :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear how Reddit banned r/altright? They pressed Ctrl+Altright+Del.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dyslexic friend... My dyslexic friend told me about a laugher house near him... he said he''d go and see if it was any good... if it was he''d bring me next time... you know... it''s been a few years and he must still be in there... [NOTE: I''M SORRY IF THIS IS A REPOST OR A BAD JOKE, I JUST WANTED TO THROW A, POSSIBLY, NEW JOKE INTO THE MIX]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where should children with ADHD be sent? A Concentration Camp!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of underwear does the Alt-Right wear? Tighty Righties.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife asked if I will ever stop quoting Gangsta''s Paradise The way things are going I don''t know', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats worse than finding your wife at a brothel? Finding a fucking orangutang in a brothel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s got two wings and an arrow? A Chinese telephone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dinosaur that sings? A velocirapper', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only people that look up to school shooters... ..are the students on the ground', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is 17 referred to as the "Hot Cousin" in black jack? Because you want to hit it but you''d probably bust and everyone be pissed at you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always wondered why they say space smells like seared steak Then I remember the Challenger disaster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was reading Reddit at this Restaurant When this guy at the table next to me started grabbing his chest and fell to the floor. The waitress yelled out "Does anyone know CPR??!!" "Well heck" I said, "I know the entire alphabet!" And everyone laughed and laughed. Well ... all except one guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a quadriplegic moose wearing a Guy Fawkes mask? A non-knee moose! Ba-dum-tiss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t hydrogen want to room with fluorine in college? Fluorine was so electronegative all the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This woman just caught me looking down her top. I panicked so much I almost fell off the toilet seat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Hitler approve of his mathematicians? They were all ~z-s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want a new perspective that''s not AltRight? Try CtrlAltRight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In my day, men were men, and women were secretaries.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a new actor and just shot a pilot... ...turns out I wasn''t supposed to use a loaded gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I try not to comment about what is in the news but... I have seen a lot of hate spewed in recent days about a man who is a constant winner and overachiever, and that''s what the people who support him like about him. Yes, he''s been caught in some lies and maybe twisted the truth a little but he''s still out there proving his haters wrong time after time! Some people are just jealous of someone who is successful and has money. Throw in a hot foreign model at his side and they hate even more. You may not have wanted him in this role, but he''s there now and there''s nothing you can do about it. I know its just going to get worse over the next several days, but like it or not, Tom Brady is in the Super Bowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t take life too seriously. You''ll never get out of it alive', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('30 people were waiting in line to get punched in the face... I guess you could call that the punch line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest sees a self-made millionaire take some money out of the poorbox When the priest asks why, The millionaire looks down and replies "I just got divorced"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me at my second rodeo: This ain''t my first rodeo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of veggies do you eat before going out to the club? Turn-Up Greens', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beyonce is pregnant! She''s having twins! The media will refer to them as Bey''s BeyBeys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign of the times: if you win a million bucks as a contestant on "The Wall" ...they make Telemundo pay for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Spanish priests put on the communion bread? Soy sauce', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s not alright The altright', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My first time on an elevator was quite uplifting... The second time was a let down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of blondes were talking about things they got while shopping So i bought a new toilet brush. Is it any good? No, not really. I think toilet paper works better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: Dad, Ive never heard you pull a joke before, have you ever pulled one? Dad: Sure son, I had to pull one back in 97 Son: But thats when I was born Dad: Exactly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow get an award? because he was out standing in his field.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cannibal cross the road? To get to the body shop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if an autistic guy likes you? He looks at your shoes while he jerks off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a way to make my penis 6 inches long. Fold it in half!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Billy Mays die? He confused his Oxi-Clean with his Cocaine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Claustrophobia (fear of having no escape, and being closed) When you walk towards a pub, ... and you are afraid that it might be closed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you turn a duck into a soul singer? Put it in the microwave until its bill withers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is like bread. It''s easy to get a rise out of her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it!! How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way, unique up on it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I LOVE ISIS She''s my favorite Egyptian god', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the circumference of a circle say to its diameter? Want some pi?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey girl, are you an integral? Because I want to substitute u for my x.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the Lord said onto John: "Come forth John and you will receive eternal life" But John came 5th and won a toaster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Trump retract claims that George Soros was behind the paid protestors that have taken to the streets since his inauguration? He was jealous that Soros had created more jobs than he had.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye matey', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently someone in London gets stabbed every 52 secconds Poor bastard', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats green, fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A pool table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women call me ugly untill they find out how much money i make Then they call me ugly and poor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend recently took up origami... My friend recently took up origami, although he''s not very good at making creases, and every time he messes up he gets angrier and angrier... Trust me, you wouldn''t want to be there when it all unfolds...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an elephant crossed with a rhino? ''Eliphino?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL What a lay up was. Explains a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you turn a duck into a soul singer? Put it in the microwave until it''s bill withers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I try to teach my dad a new lesson every day. They say it''s good to learn from your mistakes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Incompetent Female Arsonist? A Farcenist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is prescribed a medication by his doctor. The doctor warns the man that because the medication has a bitter taste he should take it with something to mask the flavor, like apple juice. The man replies, "That''s a good idea. I hate the taste of apple juice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a civilian called in military slang? A collateral damage still alive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, big brains are important... but big muscles are importanter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Parents always told That you should learn from mistakes. That''s Why they have so many books about children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know a farmer who likes throwing darts at his mating donkeys for fun He''s a pain in the fucking ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had to take a drug test for Calculus. Had to take a drug test for Calc. 2 It was a P-test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you guys heard of the new semen-based hair gel? It''s the next generation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two silkworms were in a wrestling match. It ended in a tie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex Doll Do muslim sex dolls blow themselves up?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A slave say to another slave... Are you free tonight?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man saw a woman on the street and started physically abusing her She asks, "What are you doing?!" The man says "I''m hitting on you".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Daughter Texted Asking for Money... My daughter in college sent a text saying "PLZ snd $$." I asked her why she used the shorthand. She responded that it was shorter than writing it all out. I replied back "No." She asked why. I said it was shorter than writing "Yes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A factory inspector pays a visit to a ruler factory... and he walks in through the door. As he''s walking around, he notices a room with a black man in a thong, and a lot of boxes. He finds this rather odd, but he decides to ignore it. After that, the factory manager comes to greet him. "Good morning, sir", he says. "Please. Follow me." The factory inspector follows the manager to a conveyor belt. "These are our conveyor belt workers. They check the rulers on the conveyor belt for defects", explains the manager. The factory inspector nods. He then follows the manager to an area where workers are loading rulers into boxes. "These are our loading workers. They load the rulers into boxes." Once again, the factory inspector nods. Finally, the manager leads the factory inspector into the strange room he had seen before. "This is Tyrone. He makes sure all our rulers are exactly 12 inches."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just found out that Santa Clause raises livestock in between Christmas... I guess you could call him a Jolly Rancher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the Difference Between America and "Keeping Up With the Kardashians"? I don''t even know at this point...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 guys fighting over who has the smartest dog The first guys dog runs around, sets up the tent, lights a fire, and cooks a boiled. The second guy says "that''s nothing"! His dog runs around, sets up the tent, lights a fire, cooks a boiled egg, and then stands up on his front legs with his bum in the air. The first guy says, "what''s he doing that for?" The second guy says "he knows I need something to hold my boiled egg"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats a Mexican gangsters favorite brand of pants? Dickies. They love the way they feel on their ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many dead hookers in a basement does it take to change a light bulb? I''m not sure, but it''s more than four because it''s still fucking dark down there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The local police station got broke into today and they stole all the toilets... The police have got nothing to go on', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('64% of statistics are made up 90% of you didn''t know that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife wanted. A man inserted an ''ad'' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What results when you cross a Hippo and a Crocodile? Pretty sure you die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Japanese-mexican name his cat? Ari-gato', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m instructor flashbang I earned that nickname from my ex-wife I don''t get it but it kinda stuck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went on a date with a 45 year old woman. Me: Would you like a drink? Her: No thanks, I tried it once a didnt like it. Me: Oh ok, that''s unusual. Her: Not really, my daughter''s exactly the same. Me: Your only child I assume?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All these women on the 48 dating sites Ive joined, seem so fucking sad and desperate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl at work asks if I think she''s a 10... I said "you''re an 11." "Aww really?" she says with a huge smile. I said "yeah , you''ve got a great personality as well and that adds at least 10 points."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between 9/11 and a Cow? America can''t milk a cow for 15 years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4, 6, 8 and 9 have all been killed. 2, 3, 5, 7 and 11 are the prime suspects.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun asks another What would you do if someone with bad intentions gets ahold of you? Nun: I would lift up my dress Other Nun: Oh my! What would you do then? Nun: I would ask him to put his pants down Other Nun: Wow. I didn''t expect this from you. What would you do after? Nun: I would run away. I bet I can run faster lifting my skirt than he can with his pants down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy and a girl go on a first date. They go to the carnival that is in town. The guy asks her, what''s the first thing you want to do? She says to get weighed. He''s says alright let''s go, takes her to the carny that that will guess her weight. The carny guesses 108lbs, she says he''s wrong that she''s 112lbs. So she gets to pick out a stuffy. So the guy asks her, now what would you like to do? She replies, get weighed. He thinks to himself that''s odd but ok, proceeds to take her to the weigh booth again. The carny guesses her weight at 112lbs. No stuffy for her. He then asks her, now what do you want do? She replies again, get weighed. He figures this chick is crazy and this date is going no where so he calls it a night, drives her home and tells her this just won''t work. The girl walks into her apartment and her roommate asks her, how did the date go? She replies, wousy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do oysters get around? In mussel cars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve got a part time job making rubberised computer keyboards. They offer flexible shifts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got drunk and hired a cheap lawyer last night. Think I might have contracted something...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish that I could buy the new iPhone... but iBroke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t Massachusetts have a Debate team? Because it would be called the Mass-Debate team.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde get so excited when she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months? Because on the box it said "From 2-4 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bodybuilder named Scott A bodybuilder named Scott is working out at the gym and has just deadlifted 600 pounds, a personal best. Still holding the bar, he looks over to his trainer, who shouts: "Great, Scott!" And he replies: "I know, this is heavy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My name is Talia, my mother gave me that name. [NSFW] Batman: Is your first name Jenny? Coz then you''d be Jennytalia, and I hear you''re a total cu**.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best mexican food to eat while you''re watching Netflix? andchill-adas', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tragic case of malpractice and injustice So this unfortunate fellow comes down with gangrene and goes to the doctor. The doctor tells him that the leg will have to be removed. After the operation the man wakes up and to his horror the doctor had amputated the wrong leg. Of course the doctor had to go back in immediately and take off the correct leg. Months later the malpractice case was brought to court but the judge threw it out immediately as the plaintiff didn''t have a leg to stand on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many vampires showed up to the garlic eating competition? I don''t know, it was countless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finally, i can play Golf in peace. A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man. The man then replies: Yeah, well...we were married for 35 years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[OC] What do you tell a preacher when they invite you over for spaghetti dinner? "Pasta pasta, pasta." :) EDIT: Say it out loud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two fish in a fish tank. The first fish said, "How do you drive this thing?" The second fish said, "Holy crap! It''s a talking fish!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If my last name were Plate, I''d open a computer repair shop... and call it Plate Tech Tonics.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peace out. See you guys in four years -Democracy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl gets lost in the supermarket A security guard asks her ''What''s your mum like?'' ''Big cocks and vodka'', replied the little girl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a soup bowl from Krypton?! Well ... *a kryptonian soup bowl*, obviously.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump hosts Putin for a state dinner at The White House When a guest asks "Mr. President, what have the two of you been discussing all day?", to which Trump responds "Planning World War 3." The guest asks "What will that be like?" Trump: "We''re going to kill 4 million muslims and one dentists." The guest appears confued and asks "But why one dentist?", when Putin leans over, slaps Trump on the shoulder and says: "See Donald, what did I tell you - no one will ask about the Muslims."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beyonce Pregnant With Twins, Names Already Chosen Red and Yellow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was born my father said "Now I''m certain I want two children!" I was the third.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Putin, Hillary and Trump crash in a freak plane accident 100 kilometres into oacean from cuba. They all 3 drifting in saving raft. But luck! Trump finds 2 paddles, and they decide to row towards Cuba. Now they have to decide who will row. Before everyone becomes sexist, Hillary suggests to hold democratic election. After election as Hillary and Trump are rowing, Trump silently whispers to Hillary: "Don''t you think Putin cheated? There is only three of us in raft, but each of us both got 5 votes..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beyonce is having twins! I wonder if they will be Red ivy and Green ivy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wasn''t sure about how to ask the love of my life to marry me So, I decided to ask her husband for advice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to a priest . . . [OC - I just made this up!] . . . And confesses his sins. "Forgive me father, for I have sinned," he says. "I see a different woman every night." The priest frowns. "You have sinned greatly, young man, for every time you engage in intercourse with a different woman, a part of your soul is left in her. However, I forgive you." The man thanks the priest and continues on his way, vowing to never do it again - but later that night, he stumbles upon a gorgeous woman at a bar, who introduces herself as Mrs. Crux. Back at his house, he is engaging in intercourse with her. She asks him to speak dirty to her. He thinks for a moment, then cries, "You''re my whore, Crux!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn''t because I''m vegetarian and offended.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only thing smaller than Donald Trump''s hands... The only thing smaller than Donald Trump''s hands is Donald Trump''s heart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of four-year-olds were trying hard to become accustomed to school. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk! "You need to use ''big people'' words," she was always reminding them. "John, what did you do over the weekend?" "I went to visit my Nana." "No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use ''big people'' words!" She then asked Mitchell what he had done. "I took a ride on a choo-choo." "No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. You must remember to use ''big people'' words," she said. She then asked little Alex what he had done. "I read a book," he replied. "That''s wonderful!" the teacher said. "What book did you read?" Alex thought very hard about it, then puffed out his chest with great pride and said, "Winnie the SHIT!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MOM! at school they tell me i''m too distracted! kid, i''m the neighbour, your house is across the street.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back at school, I had a weird geometry teacher. He had warts all over his nose, and they had to remove a bit of his face due to an accident. You could say he had an... Irregular sir face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Karl Marx and Donald Trump? Trump only advocates the seizing of a *woman''s* means of production', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t find my k+(1/4a) I guess I''ve lost my focus...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to rob a bank using jello cast in the shape of a gun The police charged me with carrying a congealed weapon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people worry drinking in the shower is a sign of alcoholism I just worry about keeping the water out of my beer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage is like blackjack Marriage is like blackjack. You can either hit or stay, but you can''t do both', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad wanted to take me out for the first drink on my 21st birthday. We arrive at the local Elks Club, sit next to a few of his friends and he orders us a round. After taking a swig of that first beer he proclaims " boys there''s nothing better than cold beer and tight pussy!" To which they all agree. He then turns, points at me and says " Then Fat Head here came along and ruined one of those for me!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Obama was the Antichrist & Trump is a facist dictator Either America has grown more tolerant or liberals don''t believe in the Antichrist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best secret intelligence service? MI6 have strong Bonds but the CIA Trumps all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two firefighters Two firefighters are butt fucking in a smoke filled room. The chief walks in and yells,"what the fuck is going on in here?" The one firefighter says," he was suffering from smoke inhalation." So the fire chief asks," why didn''t you try mouth to mouth?" The firefighter says," how the hell do you think this got started!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get hanging from banana trees? Long arms', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A zebra dies and goes to heaven The zebra meets God and asks him the one true question that he''s been wondering his whole life. "God, am I a white zebra with black stripes, or a black zebra with white stripes?" God responds, "You are who you are." It was then that the zebra knew he was white with black stripes. If he was black with white stripes, God would have told him, "You is who you is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump''s releasing a hip-hop song this year Going Back To Calais', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a penis and a vagina? [NSFW] I''d say there''s quite a vas deferens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Frenchman put snails in his gas tank? To make escargot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would love to be a mirror cleaner. I can see myself making a living that way...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My last relationship was like Forrest Gump She was a whore and I was retarded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Secret Service arrest the recently immigrated masseuse? They said Melania told the masseuse after he was done to give the President a fist bump, not to fist Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Harper Lee''s favourite spirit to drink when she went claypigeon shooting? Tequila Mockingbird', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man frantically walks into the doctor''s office... ...and begins to shout, "I''m a teepee! I''m a wigwam! I''m a teepee! I''m a wigwam!" "Calm down, calm down!" The doctor says. "You''re two tents!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Walking home after a girls'' night out, two women pass a graveyard and stop to pee... The first woman has nothing to wipe with, so she uses her underwear and tosses it. Her friend, however, finds a ribbon on a wreath, so she uses that. The next day, the first woman''s husband phones the second woman''s husband, furious: "My wife came home last night without her panties!" "That''s nothing," says the other. "Mine came back with a card stuck between her butt cheeks that said, ''From all of us at the fire station, we''ll never forget you.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the pirate sell his corn for on the side of the street? Buck an ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s a medical breakthrough! An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut out a man''s liver put it into another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we took a part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we took half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. About a week ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him our President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sad marijuana pipe? Miserabowl!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Eat What? knock knock who''s there? I eat yerp I eat yerp who That''s disgusting, please stop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about Mike Pence? His favorite supreme Court case is Nix v. Hadden involving the federal classification of the tomato. It''s cause he loves when the government turns fruits into vegetables.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the two most important holes in a womans body? No!! Not them you dirty bastards!!!! Its her nostrils...they allow her to breathe while she''s sucking your dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I fingered my girlfriend during her period Her parents caught me red handed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a near death experience and a booty call? One is ducking fate and the other is a...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the broom late? It overswept!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the favorite food of infinity. Cocaine. Cos it''s a high number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the rebellious Hebrew child? He went out and got stoned with his mates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man takes a stool sample to the hospital Everyone is looking at him with disgust as he asks for the optical department. "Sir the laboratory is to the right" "I don''t need to go to the laboratory" He hops on the elevator and yet again is told the laboratory is to the right "I don''t need to go to the laboratory! I need the optical department" Finally he gets there and the doctor looks at the sample and says "Sir this isn''t the laboratory" The blind man out of rage then tells him "I don''t need the godamn laboratory! I need to go to the optical department because every time I do this my eyes get watery!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a rumor going around that someone in my group of friends is gay... I hope it''s Josh, he''s pretty cute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Been reading a fascinating memoir about Latino street culture. It''s a collection of ess.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m thinking about moving to Switzerland... For a couple of reasons, but their flag is a big plus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Pitbulls favorite sports icon? Dale! Earnhardt Jr.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fake TV bought on craigslist? A video-con.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do when a chemist dies? You barium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a cat like a joke? If you dissect it, it dies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of table is good for your health? A vegetable! This joke was made by adorable 8-year-old niece! It wasn''t. It was made by a 27 year old. Me. It was made by me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Princess Leia like her showers? Lukewarm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day I had food poisoning And I had diarrhea for a whole week. I shit you not', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I haven''t lost my virginity yet... Because i never lose', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would the name be of a magician duo containing a chicken and a deaf woman? Hen and Keller.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Another college girl with a very active sex life... She especially loved hooking up with prisoners and professional ice hockey players. Those were kind of her fetishes, and she didn''t know why. She didn''t really like to use condoms, though, which was very dumb of her, and she knew that, but she thought it felt so much better without one. Also, she was on birth control. Only, one day, her period didn''t come as expected. She thought it was probably nothing, but she was suspicious nonetheless. She went to the store and bought a pregnancy test, and, lo and behold, she was indeed pregnant. Well, shit. Due to her active sex life and having slept with all those pro players and prison boys, she didn''t really know, which one of them had gotten her pregnant. She thought about what she was to do. Should she keep the baby? How could she find the father? And then it hit her. She had to make a list of all the pros and cons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister bet me a hundred dollars I couldnt build a car out of spaghetti. You should''ve seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Guys in a Jail cell There''s two guys in a cell and the one the guys says to the other : Man 1 : since we in here fo life, me and you gonna get married. But I''m nice... I''ll let you decide if you wanna be the husband or the wife . Man 2: "The husband of course" Man 1: "Then why don''t you come here and suck your wife''s dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That day in lab I nearly made a science joke ...but my friend said Na.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new tax law Trump has issued? I don''t know much about it but it seems tariff-eyeing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by accidentally giving my girlfriend my sandwich that had extra cheese when she''s lactose intolerant Whoops, wrong sub.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the number 0 say to the number 8? "Nice belt."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel very akward when I watch dance instruction videos. Always staring at the feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does the king keep his armies? In his sleevies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend broke up with me cause I stole her wheelchair But I knew she''d come crawling back to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat Aliens thought she was our Dyson Sphere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say I''m superficial ...but that''s just on the surface.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do Christians go after throwing up? Heave''in', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a homeless horse? Unstable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk guy looks at a wanted poster... And thinks ''why would they let him go after clicking the pic''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Backstage at Project Runway, Tim walked past me holding some coffee. I said, "Hey, Gunn, where you going with that joe in your hand?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s still hard to take Trump seriously. For some reason I get the feeling he''s just Putin us on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did a banana go to the doctor? because he wasnt.. peeling well hahahah (ill find the door)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor''s Discussion An Israeli doctor says : " In Israel , medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man ''s liver put them on another man , and in 6 weeks , he is looking for work . " The German doctor says : " That ''s nothing , in Germany we take part of a brain , put it in another man , and in 4 weeks he is looking for work . " The Indian doctor says : " Gentlemen , we take half a heart from a man , put it in another ''s chest , and in 2 weeks he is looking for work . " The American doctor laughs : " You all are behind us . Two days ago , we took a man with no brains , no heart , and no liver and made him President.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to date a girl that only had one leg... Her name was Ilene and she worked at IHOP', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is a Trump supporter who ran out of breakfast bread. She lacks toast and tolerance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the hair on a cows lip? A Moo-stache. > The perks of having too much free time in a call center.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One saggy boob said to the other saggy boob... "We need to pick ourselves up otherwise everyone will think we''re nuts"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend often accuses me of telling sexist, condescending jokes that target women. I''ve explained to her those jokes are actually ironic jabs at the current state of post-modern feminism, designed to highlight societal double standards across genders. So she needn''t worry her pretty little head about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that mentally disabled kid who shoved a burger up his ass? I think he''s got assburger syndrome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a long day of eroding civil rights, Donald can''t wait to get home and remove Melania''s panties. She really gets upset when he stretches them out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You get the most from a Women''s Studies degree when you... ...spend a semester studying abroad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Snoop''s favorite contraction? We''d', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A prostitute asks her doctor if he could drill another hole next to her ass. The surprised doctor asks why...? "Business is going well, I want to open another branch" she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I keep wanting to try Kraftig... But the last time Germans talked about purity my ancestors had to flee the continent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike rushed into a math class while in full session Mike rushed into a math class while in full session. The teacher was aghast: - Why are you so late Mike? Mike tried to calm down: - Gunmen in ski masks attacked me. The teacher reached out to him: - Oh My God! Are you hurt? Mike: - No, but they managed to grab my homework.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do French people do on Valentine''s Day? They d''clair their love to each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Man Lost his Wife In Tsunami A Man Lost his Wife In Tsunami One Drunk-Night .. while standing on the Seashore, waves touching on his feets . He shouted to the Sea: ''No matter how many times your Waves Touch my Feet . . . I''ll Never take her back .. !! Its your mistake.. Deal With It Now....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('a priest, rabbi and, caliphate walk into a bar they woke up in the hospital with a concussion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doors of my house are open for you always. Get out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Difference between twins I''ve fucked a set of twins. People have asked me how hard it was to tell them apart, but it was actually quite easy. You see, Caroline was a redhead with an amazing pair of tits, And frank had a cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer''s Siamese twin brother was a criminal... He was con fused.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teach a man to fish, and he''ll be able to eat for a lifetime. Teach a Nigerian to phish, and he''ll become a prince.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stop posting Chuck Norris jokes on the Internet. Chuck Norris will delete the internet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am a loyal man. When I go out shopping with my mom, I don''t look at other moms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rumor has it there''s a basketball court on the roof of the Supreme Court building. It''s the highest court in the land.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between me and trash? Nobody takes me out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t know what to get my mother for Christmas I turned to my colleagues and asked what I should get for her when my boss says "Get her some slippers and a dildo, if she doesn''t like the slippers she can go and fuck herself"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the doctors about my hearing.. I went to the doctors about my hearing and the doctors asked me "Can you describe the symptoms?" I said "Yeah, Homer''s fat and Marge has blue hair"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man walks into a restaurant and asks the waiter "what''s the special today?" Waiter replies "Oasis soup" - Man: "why is it called Oasis soup?" Waiter replies "cos you get a *roll with it*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I will find you.. You have my Word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants. "Well," he said, "I''ve been seeing this girl for a while and she''s really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight''s "the" night. We''re having dinner with her parents, and then we''re going out. And I''ve got a feeling I''m gonna get lucky after that." "Once she''s had me, she''ll want me all the time, so you''d better give me the 12 pack." The young man makes his purchase and leaves. Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessing and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl leans over to him and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious person." The boy leans over to her and whispers, "You never told me that your father is a pharmacist."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The weirdest thing I''ve heard during sex is "Cum inside me." I got pretty freaked out. Why? Hands don''t talk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a round table meeting of a bunch of chronic masturbators? A circumference BADUMTSS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes me a good scottish man? **Well if i were a bad scottish man,i wouldn''t have been discussing this with ya now would i?**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what do you get when you cross a bison with a duck? buffalo bill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do dogs go when they lose their tail? To the retail store', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you can an acoholic dwarf? Just a little drunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got arrested the other day after police found me covering a boy with melted sugar I was charged with child molassation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Noticing a woman sitting alone at a table in a bar... .. a man goes over to chat with her. After talking to her for a while he makes his move. "Stop!" says the woman as the man tries to kiss her. "I''m sorry but I''m keeping myself pure until I meet the man I truly love." "Wow", says the man, "that must be difficult." "It''s not too bad", replied the woman. "My husband''s quite upset though."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my teacher to tell a joke He said "Want me to announce your grades?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Holmes and Watson were investigating a murder at an archaeological dig-site Holmes picks up several of the rocks and pebbles surrounding the murder victim. After a while, Holmes turns to his companion and says "I''ve cracked the case. The suspect was clearly murdered with a blow to the head by a rock, which then crumbled and scattered into pieces." "How on Earth can you tell?" exclaims Watson. "It''s sedimentary, my dear Watson."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not addicted to drinking brake fluid.... I can stop any time I want.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two silk worms are in a wrestling match It ended in a tie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Black History Month A kid in my class asked why we had a Black History Month and not a White History Month. I told him we had eleven.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They said "Find something you love to do and you will never work a day in your life" They are darn right, that field isn''t hiring!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Donald Trump wear such a long tie? It''s his leash.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandfather had a heart of a lion... and also a lifetime ban from the zoo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hitler was caught jacking off by a dead jew. Hitler: Oh no, I did Nazi you there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to have a pet leech. It was attached to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can''t blame Monica Lewinsky for getting her dress dirty... I''m sure she just didn''t see it coming...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('the ghostly act of not respecting your equals disapeer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have one advice to the people of /r/NoFap Go fuck yourself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A World Wide Survey.... A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The survey was a huge failure. In Africa they didn''t know what "food" meant. In Eastern Europe they didn''t know what "honest" meant. In Western Europe they didn''t know what "shortage" meant. In China they didn''t know what "opinion" meant. In the Middle East they didn''t know what "solution" meant. In South America they didn''t know what "please" meant. And in the USA they didn''t know what "the rest of the world" meant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would Reddit do for a Klondike bar? OP''s mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need to stop making autism jokes But the repetition is just too soothing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the girl that was dating an Eskimo? She broke it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Moses doesn''t mind period sex. He''s used to being in the red sea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 original jokes Here''s 2 (bad) jokes I made up a few years ago. With all the reposts on here some new ones might be nice even if they are bad! 1. What do you call a long snake-like poo? A Poothon 2. A family of poothons were floating down a river. The son poothon asks his mother "dad told me that we''re just a by-product of the human digestive system, is that true?" The mother replies "don''t listen to him, he''s just talking shit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday I killed a pair of pigeons with an unmanned flying device. You could say I killed two birds with one drone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Gregor Mendel never finished any of his work? That''s right! No punnett ended', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the year of good eyesight? The Year 2020', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are seagulls called seagulls? Because, if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagels.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of joke is the best joke? A Communist joke, because everyone gets it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dual stand up act on their periods? comoody', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad what does it feel like having an awesome son? Me: Dad what does it feel like having an awesome son? Dad: I dont know ask your grandpa Edit: Can''t believe i got 1000 upvotes , Thanks Dad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the fastest food in the world? Scone', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad always told me he never made the same mistake twice Must be why I''m an only child Edit: First time on front page thanks guys!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest had a speaking parrot One night when the priest went on vacation a burglar broke into his house. Trying to be as sneaky as possible he didn''t used his flashlight. Suddenly he heard a voice say:" Jesus sees you!" He quickly turned on his flashlight and looked around. When he saw the parrot the parrot again said:" Jesus sees you!" The burglar asked the parrot:" Who are you little Buddy?" The parrot answered:" I''m Josef." The burglar laughed:" What idiot names his parrot Josef?" The parrot answered:" The same Idiot who named his pitbull Jesus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The CIA, GIGN and KGB...... are all trying to prove they are the best at catching criminals. The Secretary General of the UN decides to set them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest, and each of them has to catch it. The CIA people go in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations, they conclude that the rabbit does not exist. The GIGN goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and make no apologies: the rabbit had it coming. The KGB goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: Okay! Okay! Im a rabbit! Im a rabbit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t the number 288 ever be said in public? Because it''s too gross', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like going for a jog at night The fear of getting murdered really helps my stamina.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Officer: Soldier, do you have change for a dollar? Soldier: Sure, buddy. Officer: That''s no way to address an officer! Now let''s try it again. Do you have change for a dollar? Soldier: No, SIR!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you cant get a decent job without education. But look at Albert Einstein he was a drop-out and still ended up being the first man on the moon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Know why Mexico doesn''t have a good Olympic team? Anybody that can run, jump, or swim is already in the U.S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters were out in the woods Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He''s not breathing and his eyes are glazed, so his friend calls 911. "My friend is dead! What should I do?" The operator replies, "Calm down, sir. I can help. First make sure that he''s dead." There''s a silence, then a loud bang. Back on the phone, the guy says, "Ok, now what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a co-pilot and a duck? The duck can fly. EDIT: this is a pilot joke - I obviously know that co-pilots can fly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You must be calcium You make my bone hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Pizzas & parents have in common? If they''re black, you have nothing to eat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Men walk into a bar... The third one ducked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a disagreeable Russian Sasquatch? A Nyeti.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Caught my wife receiving oral sex from our refrigerator again. I''ll never buy another Kelvinator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Despair. What a Jamaican gets when he''s bowling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a colour doing a chemistry degree? Cyantific.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sherlock and Watson were walking through an orchard... As they walk Watson keeps asking Sherlock to identify the trees they are seeing. After some time they approach a clearing and in the centre is a lone tree. Watson asks "Sherlock what is that tree with yellow skinned fruit?" Sherlock smiles and replies "That''s a lemon tree, my dear Watson"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A diplomat walks into a bar... A diplomat walks into a bar, orders a beer and sits next to another patron. They get to talking and the topic of careers comes up. "I''m a government official" says the diplomat. "I travel the world, negotiating trade deals and brokering peace agreements. It''s an amazing job." "Shit" says the other patron, "I''m just an electrician, I''m nowhere near that important!" "Not at all" the diplomat replied. "We both must stay informed on the same matters. You sound like you''re just as plugged in to current affairs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got frostbite and had part of my foot amputated. Then my girlfriend left me. She was lack-toes intolerant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can someone get me a new calendar? Mayan ended', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An interview with the best racer in the world Reporter: So, how do you do it? How do you keep winning? Racer: Winning? Reporter: Yeah, you have been undefeated since day one. Racer: I''ve invented a new way of winning a race, it''s about coming through the finish line last. So far everyone else have been better at it than me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher reminds her class for tomorrow''s exam A teacher reminds her class of the yearly test tomorrow. "And remember class, there is no excuse for missing the test tomorrow, not a hurricane, not a funeral, not a nuclear attack, nothing!" Little Johnny in the corner then pipes up and says "What would happen if I came into class suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion? The whole class bursts into laughter. The teacher walks up to Johnny and smiles and says "I''d guess you''d have to write the test left-handed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lion, a witch, and a Wardrobe apparate into a bar The bartender calls out, "Hey, no secret identities in this bar!" So the lion transforms into a bright light, the witch dons a pantsuit, and a man steps out of the closet. The bartender is aghast, almost on the verge of tears. "Oh my lord. I never thought I''d meet God, Hillary Clinton, and Drake in the same day!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How often do guinea pigs have sex? Once a wheek wheek wheek wheek!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does the man with fake hair never carry around his wallet? Because he never expects to toupee anything', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate gravity... It''s always putting me down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lauren was lying in bed One night when she felt her husband''s hand caressing her neck in a way she hadn''t experienced in quite a while. Then it slid down her side, stopping at her knee, which was as far as her husband could reach. Then he moved close and did the same on her other side before abruptly stopping and moving away. Delighted by this unexpected attention, Lauren whispered, "Honey, that was wonderful. Why did you stop?" He answered, ''''I found the remote."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the last thing to cross Paul Walker''s mind? The windshield', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a church that had a bell that no one could ring There was a church that had a bell that no one could ring. One day, a boy came and asked the priest if he could try. He went up into the tower and ran straight into the bell face-first. The bell tolled loud and clear. The priest gave him the job. One Sunday, the boy ran straight toward the bell with his face and missed, so he fell off the tower and died. "Congregation," the priest said before the assembled masses. "Does anybody know this boy''s name? I don''t know him, but his face rings a bell."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does an angry Mexican season his food? ...With a pinche salt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pair of jumper cables walk into a bar The bartender says "I''ll serve you, but you better not start anything"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cant believe how much my girlfriend is crying about her new haircut Its much worse for me, Im the one whos gonna have to find a new girlfriend now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between oranges and babies? I don''t fuck the oranges after I skin them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blind man cross the street ? At least he tried ......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Chinese person with a video camera? Phil Ming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 flies on a terd 1 fly farts and the other says ''do you mind I''m eating''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before leaving, my mother asked me, "How long will you be travelling through Scandanavia?" I replied, "Until I''m Finnished."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gay dating is hard when you only like pessimists. I''m not interested in positive men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what do you call gangster spaghetti spaghetto', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a magic dog? A labracadabrador', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ''''I''m looking for the man who shot my paw.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Google maps hold down a solid relationship Because it''s always looking for the quickest possible route', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a pizza delivery driver and a gynecologist have in common? They both have to smell it but neither of them gets to eat it. :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with no hands walks into a palm reader''s business The palm reader looks at him and says, "well, I''m stumped."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a white bear that can''t push? A polar bear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the man ask the Jamaican Chef? "What Jamaican?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar for every time a woman didn''t show interest in me They''d probably eventually show interest in me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elephants were watching a naked man... One elephant turned and asked the other, "How the hell does he eat with that thing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump said "I am going to drain the swamp and take on the establishment"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A football coach of an all Redneck team walked into the locker room before a game,... looked over to his star player and said, "I''m not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we need you in there. So what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play." The player agreed, and the coach looked into his eyes intently and asks, "Okay, now concentrate... what is two plus two?" The player thought for a moment and then he answered, "Four?" "Four?!?" the coach exclaimed, excited that he got it right. At that, all the other players on the team began screaming, "Come on coach, give him another chance!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old guy buys a new sports car..... And right after he leaves the salesroom, he floors the gas pedal making him zip in the road. He notices that a police car, with it''s siren blaring so he really puts the pedal to the max. While in hot pursuit, he realizes that he''s too old for this. So he pulls over, waiting for the cop to catch up to him. The cop finally approaches him, and tells him "Sir, my shift ends in 10 minutes. It''s C Christmas. If you can give me a good reason that you did this, i''ll let you go." The man explained that his wife, many years ago she ran off for a policeman. i thought you were bringing her back. "Have a good day sir" Said the cop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My favourite job has always been giving stupid people advice. Hello! You clicked! What do you want to know?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s Going to Pay For the Wall? Mexico Mexic Mexi Mex Me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Went for a walk with the missus last night... There''s a beautiful spot on top of the hill not so far from here, on the way whilst walking down a quiet path she turned to me and said, "Give it to me, give it to me, I''m wet". I stopped for a second and looked around, and then it dawned upon me "No fuck off, it''s my umbrella".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito will stop sucking after you slap it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If two people having sex is called a twosome..... Then now i know why they call you handsome ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man looking for his wife... The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, You know, Ive lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes? Why? Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Trump''s choice for Supreme Court Justice is strongly opposed to euthanasia. I wonder what he''s got against kids in the Orient?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So this guy works at a pickle factory... Every day, he comes home after work and tells his wife about his day. One day, he comes home and tells her he has a very dark fantasy. He says, "I want to put my dick in the pickle slicer." His wife is shocked, and encourages him not to do it, but the next day the man comes home with a sick grin on his face. His wife says, "Please tell me you didn''t do it!" The man keeps grinning. His wife takes off his pants to assess the damage, but everything is as it should be. The wife is confused. The man keeps grinning. He says, "I did it, I put my dick in the pickle slicer, and she wants to do it again this weekend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should you put on the tomb stone of a mathematician? He didn''t count on this...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went into a bar and sat infront of a bowl of pretzels... "You have some very nice clothes" said the bowl of pretzels. The man thinking he was hallucinating, ignored the bowl and called the waiter and ordered a margarita. "Nice choice good sir" said the bowl of pretzels. The man once again thinking he was hallucinating ignored the bowl of pretzels. On recieving his drink he gave the waiter a dollar as thanks. "You are quite generous my good sir" said the bowl of pretzels. The man startled called the waiter, "I thought I was hallucinating, but that bowl of pretzels infringement of me is complimenting me" said the man to the waiter. The waiter nodded before saying, "Don''t worry sir, the bowl of pretzels are complimentary!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A handful of foreign-exchange students are in the classroom ... and they were asked their opinion on food scarcity in other countries. The discussion was a complete disaster. The Somali kids didn''t know the English word "food", the British kids didn''t know what "scarcity" meant, the American kids didn''t know what "other countries" were, and the Chinese students asked what "their opinion" should be. Source: Not mine, I just hadn''t seen this one on /r/jokes at least in a while. Can haz less-stale repost?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad taste Did you hear Donald Trump is putting a ban on telecommunications from the middle east! It''s called the Teleban.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone asked what my favorite band was... if I''m being subjective, I''d say The Who. if I''m being objective, I''d say The Whom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sally can''t sell seashells down by the seashore anymore... She was busted for conch-traband.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Michael J. Fox is getting his own cooking show... The show is called, "Shake and Bake".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Batman when he skips out on church? Christian Bale', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On His Deathbed On his deathbed, a lifelong Republican supporter suddenly announced that he was switching to the Democrats. I cant believe youre doing this. said his friend. For your entire life youre been a staunch Republican. Why would you want to become a Democrat now? Because Id rather it was one of them that dies than one of us.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a man and a government bond? The bond matures!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was about to give an awareness speech on STD''s.. A man was about to give an awareness speech on STD''s (sexually transmitted diseases) when he realized that there were some kids in the audience so he had to speak metaphorically. He started by saying, "everyone should only drink from their wells"... and continued until the end of the speech when an old man asked the question, "what if I don''have a well?". Before the speaker could answer, the old man''s grandson said, "you can drink from your own tap grandpa".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor told me I need fewer trans fats in my life... Looks like it''s time to delete Tumblr.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black man goes inside a bus full of Koreans Everybody is talking and the only word he can make out is the word ''nigga''. The black man looks around and sees that he''s the only black person on the bus. He starts to get visibly upset and then a passenger who happened to speak english and could see why he was upset spoke up. "Excuse me, I see you are upset but there is no reason to be. Because you see, in Korean, the word ''nigga'' means ''you''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New president of a country is handed 3 envelopes by the previous leader. President of a country is handed 3 numbered envelopes by the previous leader. Previous leader says "If you screw anything up, then open one of the envelopes and it will tell you what to do." Eventually, over time, the president screws some things up. Everyone gets mad at him and threatens to impeach him. So he opens the Envelope #1. It says "Blame everything on me, your predecessor." So he does that and eventually is forgiven. But then, as time goes on, the president screws up again. He doesn''t know what to do. So he opens up Envelope #2. It says "Blame everything on me again." So, in time, the people forgive him again. But then, as time goes on, the president screws things up yet a 3rd time. He doesn''t know what to do. Relieved that he still has one envelope left, he opens it up. It says "Prepare 3 envelopes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What could US Senate learn from Trump''s wives? A two-thirds'' majority decided to ditch him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you fuck 118 million Americans with one dick? Elect him president edit: 318 million, not 118', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Friend Recently has been attaching balloons to everything he sees. I mean seriously, you can''t make this stuff up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m furious! racist tech support just called me asian All I said was my drivers keep crashing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the German man who was up to no good? I heard he has a severe guten allergy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks up to his friend and says, "I''m getting sick of being single." The friend replies "well there''s a lot of sea in the fish.... and that sea is full of men."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] I''m so sad, my favorite dating site is shutting down Disney has announced they are shutting down Club Penguin. =(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sick painting? An Ill-ustration.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MOM! I''m being called gay in school. Who is calling you that son? A bunch of cute boys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a werewolf that doesn''t know he''s a werewolf? An unawarewolf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are Steve Bannon''s favorite flowers? Gin blossoms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has 8 wheels and flies? A garbage truck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop is walking down the street and notices A cop is walking down the street and notices a young blonde woman down on her knees under a streetlight. Can I help you? he asked. The blonde woman replied, I dropped my diamond ring and Im looking for it. The cop asked, Did you drop it right here? No, responded the blonde, I dropped it about a block away, but the lights better here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my apples how I like my clown hookers: Red, yellow, green and devoid of worms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up as an altar boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I beat Anorexia today People keep coming up with weirder names for their children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad kids This lady has two little sons that curse all the time. She can''t get them to stop using foul language. She tries time outs, extra chores and taking away their toys but nothing works. One day she finally gives up and decides that she''s just gonna smack them the next time one of them says a dirty word. So the next morning the kids come running down the stairs for breakfast and she asks the first little boy what he would like to eat. He says, "Give me some fucking eggs!" BOOM! She smacks him right across the face, then politely asks the other little boy what he would like for breakfast. He says, "I don''t want any fucking eggs!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three old men Three elderly men were at the doctor for a memory test. The doctor asked the first man, "What is three times three?" "274," was his reply. The doctor said to the second man, "It''s your turn. What is three times three?" "Tuesday", he replied. Then the doctor asked the third man, "Okay, your turn. What''s three times three"? "Nine", he answered. "That''s great!" said the doctor. "How did you get that answer? "Easy," said the third man. "I subtracted 274 from Tuesday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you spell it Palindrome or Palendrome? Cause I''ve heard it both ways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George Bush and his competitor got into a fist fight... I got to say, it was Al Gore...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What hangs at a mans thigh... What hangs at a mans thigh, and wants to poke a hole, that it''s poked many times before? A key', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a little boy in church. He had to go to the bathroom so he told his mother, "Mommy, I have to piss." The mother said, "Son don''t say piss in church. Next time you have to piss, say, ''whisper'' because it is more polite." The next Sunday, the litle boy was sitting by his father this time, and once again, he had to go to the bathroom. He told his father, "Daddy I have to whisper." The father said, "OK. Here, whisper in my ear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My landscaper is also a paramedic He told me he makes more money mowing my lawn than he would finding me on my lawn having a heart attack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most controversial topic in the pirate world? Aarghbortion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did two oceans say to each other? Nothing, they just waved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife hates it when I''m on the toilet She says it brings out the worst in me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th Grade. Which one is the sexiest? The blonde, because she''s the only one who''s 18.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife is yelling at her husband. "Get out of the house! I hate you, I want a divorce! Get out!" As he walks out the door she screams: "I hope you die a slow and painful death!" The guy says: "So hang on a minute, now you want me to stay?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Reddit and elections in third world countries have in common? They both have a reasonable voting cutoff of six months', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Presidential politics is a lot like comedy. In the early days youre going to bomb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call A anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call something that has a small hole, is tasty, and covered in my cum? A glazed donut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think that move is going to work, you''ve got another thing coming. And it won''t be me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('America has a bad case of priapism... An elect dick that lasts for at least four years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL: Many medieval surnames like Fletcher or Cooper refer to the patriarch''s traditional occupation. I guess I won''t be marrying Mr. Dickinson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were the twin towers sad? Because they ordered pepperoni pizza and got plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex is like homework I only do it when my teacher forces me to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What to do you call someone that doesn''t eat meat OR vegetables? Dead', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what Disney song is really deep? Under The Sea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: *Playing Ouija board* Me: What''s your name? Ouija Board: I H A V E A B O Y F R I E N D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Co-Op is good for your resume. Sure it might be hard to coop with the workload, but instead of starting a job, you''ll be resuming one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Violets ate blue New Yorkers are polite So fuck you too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a documentary on erections... It tackled some really hard subjects.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy shoots a random man on the street. Cop: "Did you kill this man?" Guy: "No, a bullet killed him. Bullets are made of lead, which comes from the ground. The ground is part of nature. He died of natural causes. Case closed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do foxes breathe? Foxygen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two wrongs don''t make a right... ...just look at your parents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Mel Gibson walk into a bar at 9am? He overslept.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Damn my wife is disgusting. I went downstairs to piss in the sink, and it was full of dishes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just got the lead in a silent film Im absolutely speechless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what we think is funny... When I look into the mirror and we both laugh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the last thing Gable Tostee''s Tinder date said to him before walking on his apartment balcony? Cash me ousside, howbow dah?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had sex while camping? It''s fucking intense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who sexually assaults avocados? A Guacamolester Sorry for the shitty taco tuesday joke......not really.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 Drunk guys entered a taxi. 3 drunk guys entered a taxi. The taxi driver knew that they were drunk so he started the engine & turned it off again. Then said, "We have reached your destination". The 1st guy gave him money & the 2nd guy said "Thank you". The 3rd guy slapped the driver. The driver was shocked thinking the 3rd drunk knew what he did. But then he asked "What was that for?". The 3rd guy replied, "Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the best member of the communist version of the Beatles? John Lenin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a sance and a laxative have in common? They''re both used to make things come forth!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just read Trump''s book "The Art of the Deal" It had four Chapter 11''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you put a contagion in Nevada? Las Plague-as', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whoever invented the knock knock joke should receive a no-bell prize', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So an emo teenager went to grocery store. He went up to the cashier and said, pointing to his scarred arm "Hey, can you scan this?" The cashier then scans the arm, only to say, "I''m sorry sir, but this item is worthless"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was born handsome, charming witty and wise I''m also a compulsive liar, but I think it evens out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Possession is nine-tenths of the law The maxim of daemon lawyers everywhere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bacterial assassin? Tumerculosis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much is trump''s life insurance worth? One Pence', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Chuck Norris flush the toilet? He doesn''t. He scares the shit out of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump doesn''t seem to have a problem... ...fucking immigrants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where are the most waffles dropped on the beach? San Diego.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Violence is never the answer Violence is the question The answer is yes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a really successful sex change. I''m having more sex than I did last year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my underwear Drenched in blood and feces.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was at Target yesterday... I was at Target yesterday, and I saw this little girl who wanted to buy Halo 5. An old lady came up to her and said "Video games are for boys, buy something else." The girl, noticing that the lady had a box of cereal in her cart, said "Oh yeah? and trix are for kids!", then proceeded to grab the cereal out of her cart and run away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Don''t Know Shit A guy was seated next to a 10-year-old girl on an airplane. Being bored, he turned to the girl and said, "Let''s talk. I''ve heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger." The girl, who was reading a book, closed it slowly and said to the guy, "What would you like to talk about?" "Oh, I don''t know," said the guy. "How about nuclear power?" "OK," she said. "That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all eat the same stuff... grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?" The guy thought about it and said, "Hmmm, I have no idea." To which the girl replied, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don''t know shit?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does my first car and anal have in common? I didn''t want it, but my dad gave it to me anyways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A person goes to r/Jokes And finds nothing but original content', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was gunna make a joke but then I took an arrow to the knee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An 80s singer caught himself on fire, what does he do? Stop, Drop, and Rick-Roll', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What furniture store did the murderer shop at? I KEA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bush, Obama, and Trump go on a hunting trip. Their hunting guide instructs them to find and follow tracks and they should be able to find their quarry. Bush follows some tracks and gets a bear. Obama follows some tracks and gets a deer. Trump follows some tracks and gets hit by a train.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can a Toyota stretch? No, but a Mercedes-Benz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Me: Knock knock! Reddit-user: Who''s there? Me: To. Reddit-user: To who? Me: To whom*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between obsequious behaviour towards someone important in order to gain advantage and John Wayne Gacy wearing a top hat and monocle? One is sycophancy and the other is a fancy sicko. (As far as I''m aware this is an original joke that I created and am quite pleased with)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is that lobster smart enough to get out of the saucepan to turn off the heat! Trudeau is the lobster that reaches out for the seasoning!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Mexican take a Xanax? For Hispanic attacks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Having a religion is like having a penis It''s okay to have one, but just don''t go around shoving it down people''s throats.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish people would stop saying the husbands of the women who marched didn''t get a sandwich that day. Have you seen those women? No way any of them have a husband.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does China like Trump so much? They built a great wall hundreds of years ago and they still don''t have any Mexicans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Canadian shoe? A boot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to get welfare for her and her 9 children A woman goes to get welfare for her and her 9 children. When she gets to the counter the clerk asks for all her children''s names; to which she promptly replies "Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, and Joe." The clerk is confused, so he asks, "Well if you want to tell them to go to bed what do you say?" She replies, "Joe go to bed." He asks, "If you want them to eat their dinner what do you say?" She replies, "Joe eat your dinner." Finally he asks, "Well if you want to call them individually what do you say?!" She simply says, "I just call them by their last names!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always borrow money from pessimists. They won''t expect you to pay them back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At my high school if idiots could fly... it would be a fucking airport.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get an grammer nazi''s attention? That. That is how.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college girl once had a very active sex life... She especially loved hooking up with frat boys and men who had been sentenced to prison. Those were kind of her fetishes, and she didn''t know why. She didn''t really like to use condoms, though, which was very dumb of her, and she knew that, but she thought it felt so much better without one. Also, she was on birth control. Only, one day, her period didn''t come as expected. She thought it was probably nothing, but she was suspicious nonetheless. She went to the store and bought a pregnancy test, and, lo and behold, she was indeed pregnant. Well, shit. Due to her active sex life and having slept with all those prisoners and frat boys, she didn''t really know, which one of them had gotten her pregnant. She thought about what she was to do. Should she keep the baby? How could she find the father? And then it hit her. She had to make a list of all the bros and cons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the alien say after anally probing the earthling? I come in peace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I play triangle in a reggae band I just stand at the back and ting', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Doctor Who say to his wife? It''s bigger when it''s inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do the world''s most misleading people go to commit suicide? Sahr Chasm', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Later tonight I might have consensual sex with my wife. ..if she''s up for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ain''t is like a Swiss Army knife It''s got a lot of uses but you can''t use it in school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cucumber get embarrassed? Because it saw the salad dressing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was really something else, man! said the cadet policeman to his partner... "When I was off duty Saturday night, I went to this big party, see, and pretty soon I noticed this fabulous little bird giving me the eye. Then she asked me to take her home. And just as soon as we were in the car, she unzipped me and went right down on the old fella - and I still didn''t even know her name." "So what did you do?" asked the other cop. "Well, I figured this was one situation where I''d shoot first and ask questions afterward."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump discovered the lost spice girl... Stupid Spice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People told me getting my girlfriend a refridgerator for her birthday present was a bad idea. But her face lit up when she opened it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never realized how artistic horses used to be Today someone told me there used to be horse drawn carriages everywhere...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Diets are like relationships... They get easier if you allow yourself a cheat day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between men and women? Boobs Ba dum tits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do bulemics like Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because it comes with a bucket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone with no body or nose? Nobody knows', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Burger Lady (Original) A man walks up to a burger stall where he is served by an extremely sad looking lady. Ill have a double cheeseburger please, says the man before adding and cheer up, it might never happen. You''re the fifth person who has told me to cheer up today, replies the lady. Im sick of it! Who the hell are you to tell me to smile while Im making your food? Im really sorry he replies. I can see now that it was a very insensitive thing to say. I have no right at all to tell you that you have to enjoy your job, get deep satisfaction from flipping burgers, or take pleasure in dishing out this greasy crap. Surprised by his honest admission, the burger lady says Well, thanks for saying so. Apology accepted. Now how would you like your burger cooked? With relish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She flew into a Rage and punched me in the jaw!! "I THOUGHT YOU WERE TAKING ME TO CLNIQUE!! Oh honey no. I said I was taking you to a clinic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I went to see the doctor the other day And told him that I have a poop problem. Doctor: Okay now tell me what''s going on. Me: Everyday I poop at 8:00 in the morning Doctor: Okay so what''s the problem Me: I wake up at 9.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s similar between people who comment "have an upvote!" and extreme feminists? Nobody cares about either', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with no carnal desires walks into a Freudian psychoanalyst''s office The psychoanalyst stops him and says, "hey, buddy, I''m gonna need to see some id."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Buzzfeed Top 10 least conductive items! Number 6 won''t shock you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a single black mother? A black widow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did anyone hear what happened to the paraplegic at the disco? He got kicked out for arsing around', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eating pasta by myself.. makes me cannelloni.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A soldier ran up to his Sergeant It was during the middle of the Korean war. Bullets and bombs were everywhere... A soldier ran up to his Sergeant and said "Serg Serg! I have to take a wicked shit!" The Sergeant replied "Private you have ten minutes, we need you on the front line, hurry up!" The private ran off and was gone an hour and came strolling back with a smirk on his face when he crossed paths with his Sergeant who said "PRIVATE JOHNSON WHERE WERE YOU!? "Well Serg, first off I took the absolute best shit of my life." "ANNNNND!??" Yelled the Sergeant. "And, on the way back I saw a girl laying there and the next thing I know we''re having the best sex of my life." "Oh? Is that right, OK private, did you get get any head? "No, she didn''t have a head".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate walks into a bar... With a ships wheel attached to the front of his pants. The bartender says "Hey captain did you know you have a wheel on your crotch?" The captain growls and says "Arg it''s driving me nuts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some financial advice A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says: "Ill give you $800 to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. A few seconds and a satisfying glance later, Bob hands her $800 and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks: "Who was that?" "It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies. "Great," the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?" Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To Mexicans: why should you stop exporting cheese to America? Because Trump is Nacho President', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The weird thing about men is that, as they get older the begin wearing their pants higher and higher. My great-grandpa got so old he had to unzip just to talk to us!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, an NAND gate is an AND gate... ... but NOT', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar.... then a table, and then a chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Annoying Orange has 5 million subscribers, but has long since reached its peak. Now he''s president of the United States.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the bear have any friends? His personality was unbearable!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that the guy who played Captain Kirk has set up a chain of clothing shops especially for older ladies. It''s called Shatner Pants', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife asked me where I wanted to be buried. Although I''m pretty sure "balls deep in your sister" wasn''t the answer she wanted to hear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old lady at the bank asked me if I could check her balance So I pushed her over', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever wonder how many puppeteers there are in the world? Probably only a handful!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandpa has the heart of a lion... which is what happens when there aren''t enough organ donors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cabbie was part of the protest #deleteuber and so he drove to JFK. When he got there no one was around. The protesters were all at the airport but he had shown up at JFK''s grave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the most sensitive part of your body when masturbating? Your ears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s an emo in my Web Development class, she''s doing a website about jewellery Her first page was /Wrists', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? Halfway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ladies and Gentlemen... Madeleine McCann! World Hide and Seek Champion 2007!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I were happy for 20 years Then we met each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the movie Constipation? It hasn''t come out yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of fruit is always complaining about their lack of freedom in society? The Cant-eloupe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Older Man Fixes Dessert for His Wife An older couple was sitting down watching TV one evening when the wife gets a hankering for some ice cream. Wife: Honey, get me a bowl of ice cream, please. The husband stands up to go get it. His wife stops him. Wife: Oh, I also wants some chocolate syrup on it. Now write it down so you don''t forget it. Husband: I got it. Ice cream with chocolate syrup on it. Wife: I also want sprinkles and a cherry. Write it down so you don''t forget. Husband: I got it. I got it. Ice cream with chocolate syrup, sprinkles, and a cherry. The husband is in the kitchen for 45 minutes before coming back with a plate of scrambled eggs and some orange juice. Wife: See! See! I told you to write it down! You forgot my bacon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar... The man is a muslim and the bar is in the U.S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I wish I was a baker. Then I would be rolling in dough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like spaghetti... They''re straight until they''re wet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes my humour grows so dark, It starts gathering cotton in africa. .. I feel awful now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Betsy DeVos passed her Senate Confirmation hearing... and I, for one, am DeVostated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with a fork sticking out of his stomach A man goes to see the doctor. He has a fork sticking out of his stomach and there''s blood everywhere. "Doctor, doctor, help me!" The doctor looks at the man, and then looks at his watch. "I''m sorry, but it''s 5pm and my work day is over." "But doctor, please do something!" The doctor thinks for a moment, then grabs the fork and sticks it in the man''s eye. "Go to the oculist -- he works until 6." *Note: I originally heard this one in Russian*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love is like a Fart If you''ve got to force it it''s probably shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d hate to grow up to be a geologist. Because I''d always be taken for granite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Come up with your own Original joke without any time to think. Rules inside As soon as you are finished reading this just start typing. No time to think. Don''t use jokes you''ve heard in the past. You can''t stop typing! lets see how bad these turn out. Ready? Go!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the man say after his Tripod fell down for the fifth time in a row? I can''t stand this anymore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump is a good Christian So then can someone explain why he wrote an executive order that literally would ban Jesus (who comes from the middle east)?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('the best girlfriend What''s the difference between my ex and the titanic? The titanic only went down on 1,000 people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tranny, Mushit and a black guy are in a burning building and I can only save one of them You kidding me? Why would I risk my life to do that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a girl with 12 nipples the other day.. Sounds funny, Dozen tit?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a lawyers least favourite PC case. An open case.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Republicans love black people! They send millions of them to a place where they get a free room, free rent and a gym membership', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a priest and a silver medalist have in common? They both came in a little behind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Jackie Chan''s favorite type of car? KIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAA!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nerd joke. Me: look at my graphics card Other person: what''s the clock speed Me: it''s so high it hertz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Hillary Clinton''s ass jealous? All the shit was coming from her mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Clown walks into a bar... Clown walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me a treehouse." Bartender says, "A treehouse, what''s in a treehouse?" Clown says, "Playboys and cigars, of course!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only difference between group sex and group therapy... is that in group therapy you hear about everyone''s problems, and in group sex you see them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my friend who is an American diplomat how life was He said he can''t complain', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After crossing which line in Siberia, can you no longer escape it? The evenk horizon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When all else fails... ...make All Else 2.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father sits down with his 10 year old son to talk to him about the birds and the bees. He says, "Son, I think it''s about time I told you about the birds and the bees. When a man and a wom..." The son cuts his dad off mid-sentence and says, "I already know about sex, dad." Feeling both outraged and relived the dad asks, "Who told you?" The son replies, "Father McKinney, after mass." "Well, how much do you know?" And the son says "We just went over the ins and outs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL there are 189 countries NOT affected by President Trumps Extreme Vetting Executive Order. I guess 7 isn''t that bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know a dog is better than a wife? Lock them both in the trunk of your car and see who is happier to see you after an hour when you let them out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday my wife told me I was a selfish lover. I was so shocked I nearly choked on my own cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From the South, but Not Southern People: You''re from the south? But you don''t have an accent. Me: I know, my parents put me in school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to a particularly strange drive thru... The menu reads Burgers - $5 Handjobs - $10 A sexy waitress says "Can I take your order?" "Are you the girl doing the handjobs?" "Why yes, I am" The man hands the waitress $10 and says "Well clean your hands, because I want two burgers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I misheard the Muslim ban as Muslim band I thought either Donald Trump is really into percussion or I''ve misunderstood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a new antidepressant on the market for lesbians. Trycoxagin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a nun pregnant? You fuck her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the doctor say to the midget waiting in the lobby? You''re going to have to be a little patient.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breitbart news is a lot like my girlfriend Fake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once I heard a man talking about a cul-de-sac. Turns out he was an Italian with an STD.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Betsy DeVos wants to eliminate trigonometry from school math curricula because it teaches our children to sin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to a recent survey, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren''t Happy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What I hate most about this subreddit: What I hate most about this subreddit: When the first line is the title.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never tell me friction jokes... I just won''t let them slide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the bottle say to the glass after a long night? Nothing, they were both shattered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just don''t get why so many Trump supporters are into BBW? Seriously though. His supporters even love that big beautiful Jewish one in Israel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many "Suh Dude"s does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. It''s already lit fam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid had sex with his teacher So the kid just got of school and he got into the car with his mom. The mom asks, "What did you do at school today?" The kid replies, "I had sex with the teacher." The mom was furious so when they got home, she told him to go to his room and wait for his father to come home. Well the father came home from work a couple hours later and the mother told him what their son said. The dad walks up to his sons room and says, "Son, I''m proud of you. I''m going to buy you a new bike." Later that day they got the bike and the father asks, "Would you like to try it out?" The son replies, "Not now. My butt still hurts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because he''s a fungi. Why was he asked to leave the party? Because there wasn''t mushroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to date a girl with a lazy eye... but I dumped her because I could never hit the target. Like the carnival game of getting the water in the clowns mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the psychic so confident about the predictions she makes for 3 years out? Because she can see what is going to happen in 2020 crystal clear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People told me the blind people''s convention was great. I''m not really seeing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My shelf has been making weird clicking noises since I bought it it might be a Geiger counter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fat Hawaiian man recently converted to Islam Aloha Snack-bar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge was arrested after ordering a group of crows confined to an insane asylum. What for? Committing a murder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young couple are showering together A young couple are showering when the girlfriend says, "Honey I want you to do something naughty." The boyfriend agrees. He then proceeds to drop shampoo in her left eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A skeleton walks into a bar... ...he orders a beer and a mop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the cat amputee''s reaction to her successful transplant? It gave her pause', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Arab man without any goats? A virgin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Vegan goes into a Mcdonalds and says ''I''m hungry but I can''t eat anything with a face'' The manager comes over. "Sir, by the time we serve your food it hasn''t GOT a face".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a hispanics favorite arcade game? Guac-a-mole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Death Star destroy the planet? For Alderaan reasons', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Ivanka Trump and JFK airport have in common? Donald wouldn''t be happy if a muslim entered either of them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what''s the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator ? The fridge doesn''t fart when you pull your meat out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: Coup Underway - Trump takes control of senate and declares martial law! Oh wait... That was Palpatine. False alarm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard this one shopping at a mom and pop store. Maybe NSFW Store employee: do you know what slaves and coffee have in common? Me: uhhhhhh. Store employee: They''re free! As he pointed to their complimentary coffee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the earth say to the other planets? Wow. You guys have no life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The wife and I mixed it up a bit last night... We washed the silverware BEFORE the dishes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can roast beef but you cant pee soup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sits in the forest? Winnie''s pooh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think James A. Garfield Presidency was impactful He really trained for it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between sand and menstrual fluid? It''s difficult to gargle sand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the Mobius loop? To get to the other ... errr ... ummm ... wait ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best way to eat a vegetable? Remove the wheelchair first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mountains aren''t just funny, They are hill areas', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Syrian chapel and a Turkish terrorist camp? America will let in people from the terrorist camp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two stoners getting married? A weeding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Saudi who doesn''t care about current events? Living under Iraq.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Penguin A bartender was working late at night when suddenly a man ran bursting through the door and asked the bartender. Man: "QUICK, HOW TALL IS A PENGUIN?" The bartender slightly confused, he simply said. Bartender: "about this tall" The man started to panic and said. Man: "Oh god i ran over a nun!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the chicks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the philosophical whisker say to the other? Man, we''ve really grown far from our roots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It has been said that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers. However all the league records were destroyed in a fire, so we will never know for whom the Tells bowled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man just walked into my house and demanded I feed and water him. Offer him all my hospitality and pay him for watching my TV. I told him to back after Brexit. We don''t want to do that in out country anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you stop a dog from humping your leg.. Pic him up and suck on his dick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tied some rope yesterday It was knot that interesting', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you read the menu? ''Cause all I see is me ''n u', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Soviet America... Putin elects you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After years of my mom telling me to bond with my stepdad... We finally bonded over a shared annoyance of her forcing us to do bonding activities. I guess you could call it ironic bonding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Indian man was recently hospitalised after inhaling too many spices... He spent a month in a korma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was stealing kitchen utensils last night... And I barely made it out without getting caught. But it was a whisk I was willing to take.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who walked into the the bar... Then he said to the bartender, "I bet you didn''t see the second ''the'' in the title, did you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A southern white woman waits in her seat in a restaurant alone. She keeps looking around, with an anxious look on her face. She takes sips of her wine and keeps checking her phone, reading over the Tinder conversations of the sweet guy she met. Finally, her date arrives. A handsome white man, in a white button-up shirt and blue jeans. He sits down and apologizes for being late. "It''s not problem, hun" she says, laughing nervously. "There''s one thing I gotta ask you though: it said on your Tinder bio that you''re "a rapist"? Do you, like... HAVE to put that on there... legally?" The man is shocked at her words. "What?? Oh my goodness, that must be a typo! No no no, I''m very strongly against that sort of action. No, I''m a *racist*." "Oh, thank God! For a second there, I was really worried about my safety!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a rooster, and a whore? A Rooster will wake the farmer with "a Cock a Doodle Doo!" whereas a Whore will wake the farmer as "a Any Cock''ll Doo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vegans are just as bad as non vegans. Stop drinking water, THATS A *FISHES HOUSE* YOU SICK FUCK!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Timmy: Is it a sin to wear shorts? They are so comfortable. Catholic Priest: No, I don''t think its wrong to enjoy feeling little boys shorts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Timmy''s english lesson... ...was about food today. "Good morning class" says the teacher, "today''s lesson is about food! Let''s start by mentioning things we can eat. Come on kids." Sally raises her arm "bread!" "Very good, Sally!" Says the teacher. "Cornflakes!" says Billy. "Good one, cornflakes! Anyone else?" Timmy raises his hand and yells "Lamps!'' The teacher pauses for a moment, confused: "Lamps? You can''t eat lamps, what made you think that?" Timmy: "well last night I was walking past my parent''s bedroom and I heard my dad say to my mom: turn off the lamp cause I''m gonna shove it down your throat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Catch me if you can... ...said the phrase to the other phrase', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can I invest in the Mexican airline industry? Call me crazy but once this wall goes up Ive got a gut-feeling I think thats one industry that will really be taking off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are new pants like a sub-par mansion? There''s no ball room', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Steve Bannon call Trump supporters working-class hobbits? Because they''re friends with grand wizards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was gonna masturbate to Ellen. But I just wasn''t feeling it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a man backs into a car... So older man backs into a car while trying to leave a parking lot. After hitting the car, the old man looks in the mirror to see a midget hop out, obviously very angry. The midget goes up to the door and yells, "You just back into me, and I''m not happy". The elderly man takes off his glasses and responds, "Well then which one are ya".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and red all over? A sunburnt penguin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m looking for a joke about a sandwich I saw the other day so I can repost it... Ah, right sub!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I''m gone. Credit to Steven Wright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Sith Lord''s favorite drink at the bar? A Palpitini', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was stunned last night when my wife told me I was too wrapped up in myself. When the hell did I get a wife?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pet Ewok that stays inside? An Endor pet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a formula that can predict Al Gore''s dance moves? An Al Gore Rhythm algorithm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump walks into the Oval office, turns to his administrative team and says, I want to organise the deportation of 10,000 Muslims and one kitten. Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Mike Pence says. Mr. President, why do you want to deport a kitten? Trump smiles and turns to the rest of the table. You see, no one cares about the Muslims.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like toilet paper... You''re either on a roll.....or you''re taking shit from some asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For every dollar that a man makes, a woman makes 70 cents. That''s not fair. The man is only left with 30.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Genders are like the twin towers There used to be 2 of them, but now it is a sensitive topic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what, those protests changed my mind I thought only some of them didn''t have jobs but now I think all of the protestors don''t have jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I came out of the closet to my mom today but she told me I hadn''t completely cleaned up so I had to go back in', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The audible adverts are telling me to feel every word... But that would make me a literal sex offender', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Speeding ticket Driver: "What am i supposed to do with this speeding ticket?" Officer: "Keep it, When you get four of them, You get a bicycle!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of cookies do monkeys make? Chocolate chimp cookies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I brought a large amount of sperm off the internet last night, I shouldn''t of done it but you know what they say, Sex cells', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Potassium texted Sodium asking to go for coffee Sodium just said Na. Potassium replied K.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do blind people learn about sex? The hands on way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the doctors I have been having a lot of trouble reading lately so I went to the doctors. After a few tests he gave me a paper with my diagnosis and I apparently have something called "Lexdysia".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On my 16th birthday, my family tried to surprised me with a car But they missed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you spare just $2.00? Ranji is a 9yr old living in Namibia, he only has 1 leg, 1 eye and 1 arm. Each day he has to ride 7 miles to school along a narrow road on a rusty bike with bent wheels, no brakes and only one pedal.... If you send just $2.00, you get the video for it. It''s fucking hilarious.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fine-looking gentleman sat down in the main dining room of an expensive restaurant. He ordered a big dinner and spent an hour enjoying himself. After he was given the check, he summoned the headwaiter. "Ah, my friend," he said, "that was a delicious meal! Perhaps you don''t remember that I was a guest at this same table just about a year ago. And at that time I couldn''t pay the check, so you, sir had me thrown out in full view of all the other diners." "I am so sorry, sir," said the head waiter, "but, you understand..." "Oh it''s quite all right," interrupted the gentleman, "but I''m afraid I''ll have to trouble you again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I see lovers'' names carved in a tree, I don''t think its cute... I just think it''s crazy how many people bring knives on a date.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to workers at IHOP start their shift? One foot at a time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are walking through the woods when they came across a set of tracks The first blonde says, "those are deer tracks" The second replies, "No those are moose tracks" "No, deer tracks" "No, moose tracks" "Deer tracks!" "Moose tracks!" "DEER TRACKS!" "MOOSE TRACKS!" They were still arguing when the train hit them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the magic tractor? It went down the road and turned into a field.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are don''t black folks go on cruise? They are not falling for that again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#69: (NSFW) Why did the chicken give her anal? To take her to the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One week into his administration, Donald Trump''s top aide walks into his office... "Sir, your new policies have been a success. We''ve already deported three Brazilian immigrants!" "Great, there can''t be many left then!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An African man was found lying on the ground with a grain of rice next to him in the morning, what happened? He was vomiting the whole night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an orangutan holding a spoon? I don''t know I was asking you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does everyone think Trump is gonna start WW3? If anything, with today''s weaponry he''d start Cold War Part II', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who do you not want to see with a tampon? The Kool-Aid Man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do gamers say "get shit on"? Because they rectum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many times does 34 go into 16? I don''t know, ask Joey Buttafuoco.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is the most curious planet? Tellus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t be sad Because sad backwards is das, and das is nicht gut', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Chinese are celebrating the year of the rooster Meanwhile the Americans are celebrating the year of the cock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m guessing Trump has been Rick Rolled too many times ... Because he just gave you up, let you down and deserted you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between men and women? A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knew ED stood for Erectile Disfunction. Just realized it also means Executive Disorder. Pretty much the same thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar. A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my steak. Dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL I know more words than Shakespeare Shakespeare. Albatross. Conglomerate. Sasquatch. Carnival. I have more...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife accused me of being immature... So i told her to get out of my fort, because she didn''t know the password.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends Her: -Do you have any friends? Him: -You bet, all seasons, on DVDs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes into a forest. If a woman goes into the forest and makes a sound, and there isn''t a man there to hear her, is she still wrong?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you ever get that feeling like your being watched? ''Cause if it''s bothering you I''ll stop. *Edit*: It''s supposed to be you''re. I''m know I''m stupid. You can stop telling me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats better than winning silver in the special olympics? Not being disabled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smoking seriously harms you and others around you So smoke casually for the sake of public health', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Beyonce sing "To the left, to the left"? Because she has no rights.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, brunette, and redhead are each pregnant and at the doctor''s office... While sitting in the waiting area, they begin chatting. The brunette says "I was on the bottom so I''m having a girl!" The redhead says "I was on top so I''m having a boy!" The blonde starts crying hysterically. The brunette and redhead ask her what''s wrong. The blonde says "I''m going to have a puppy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you eat pussy in the morning? You ever tried to open a grilled cheese sandwich?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Tyler1 and the Earth have in common? They''re both perpetually tilted. What''s the difference between Tyler1 and Earth? Earth isn''t toxic to all known life. : ^ )', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I''m studying..... FOR MY PROSTATE EXAM!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This must be Reddit''s most eco-friendly sub... 99% recycled content.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A five year old boy was detained at a US airport for hours because he posed a security threat. Makes sense. What better assassin to kill a 5 year old president? Credit: /u/mattholomew', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('say his TRUE name 3 times with me children! "Trumpleforeskin! Trumpleforeskin! Trumpleforeskin!" And just like that, the evil troll in the White House crumpled into a pile of dust!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they don''t C#', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by accidentally turning on the speakers connected to my pc (porn) instead of turning on the stereo ones... ...whoops, wrong sub', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the egg say to the frying pan? You crack me up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Mexican with no protein? No Whey Jos', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t know what''s worse... Saying "It will only take 10 seconds" to get my wife to sleep with me or the fact that it''s true.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are being interviewed for a job at the same time The interviewer says "Alright, you can get the job if you can come up with a sentence with the words green, pink and yellow." First man replies "Well that''s easy, my favorite colors are green, pink and yellow." Interviewer smiles and says "You''re hired!" The second man scoffs and says "I saw a bird that was green, pink and yellow." Interviewer says "You got it!" Finally, the third man thinks for a while until he says "The phone rang green green, I pinked it up and said yellow!" The end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When The Devil Tries To Buy My Soul I''m Going To Show Him Pure Evil. Going to give him a 40p card charge', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A soldier ran up to a nun A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, "Please, may I hide under your skirt. I''ll explain later." The nun agreed... A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, "Sister, have you seen a soldier?" The nun replied, "He went that way." After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, "I can''t thank you enough, sister. You see, I don''t want to go to Syria." The nun said, "I understand completely." The soldier added, "I hope I''m not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!" The nun replied, "If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls&. I don''t want to go to Syria either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the Japanese Jesus say after praying? Ramen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The children were lined up in......... The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray, "Take only one. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. One child whispered to another, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 2000 mockingbirds? 2kilo mocking birds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am thinking of selling my vacuum cleaner. Well...it spends all it''s day collecting dust', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, an Aussie and a Scotsman are at a bar An Englishman, an Aussie and a Scotsman are at a bar, all having a beer. A fly lands in the Englishmans beer, he pushes the beer away with a look of disgust and orders a new one. A few minutes later another fly lands in the Aussies beer. He flicks the fly out and continues drinking. Eventually a fly lands in the Scotsmans beer. He reaches in, pulls it out and holds it over his glass, hitting the back of it and starts shouting "Spit it out ya little bastid!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love him or hate him at least President Trump is raising awareness of one of the greatest challenges facing America..... ....Mental Health. ''Cause either that dude is crazy or I am and my best guess is before all this is said and done we''re all going to need a little therapy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s our boy Donald''s favorite instrument? The *trump*et I''ll see myself out promptly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Trump tell Yates? You''re fired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife is like a hand grenade... Take off the ring and say good bye to your house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bear have to go to the hospital Because he was bearly alive!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Nazi camp and terrorist camp? Concentration required.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a comma and a cat? One has a pause at the end of a clause and the other has claws at the end of its paws.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Damn girl, your ass is like a treasure chest. Ah thank you. But why? It''s well hidden.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wth is a mellon baller? Is that like a cantaloupe with an uzi?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at a retro night down at the club The DJ played "The Twist", so I did the twist. Then he played "The Macarena", and I did the Macarena. When he played "Come on Eileen", that''s when the police arrested me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother used to always say "give your food a rinse before you eat it." Lovely woman. Terrible sandwiches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a horror film with a reality TV show? The evening news', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my friend in North Korea how life was He said he can''t complain', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say what you like about Hitler, because he''s dead and can''t complain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what kind of tree I would be? A knotty Pine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the eighth day God said: -Widescreen is the best for humanity. Sony 16:9.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does opening an ideal bar and making a woman happy have in common? Take care of 2 things, liquor in the front, poker in the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man inserted an ''ad'' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day Jon Snow was talking about Reddit. It turns out he knows kn0thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of meat does a catholic priest eat on Friday? Nun', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be careful about what you buy online If you buy stuff online, please check out the seller very carefully. One of my friends just lost $300 plus taxes on a penis enlarger. The bastard sent him a magnifying glass and the only instruction came along with was "DO NOT USE IN SUNLIGHT".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you turn a normal joke into an american joke? Fucking unnecessarily add "fucking" as much as fucking possible.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apart from humans, the only creature that has sex for pleasure is the dolphin... Do you know how many animals I had to screw to find that out?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Buzzfeeds top 10 list of torture methods Number 7 will shock you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a horny terrorist do? He blows himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shower pom A little girl was showering with her mom when she noticed her mom has hair between her legs and asks her what that is. Her mom tells her it''s a special shower pom that she can use to clean herself with. Few days later the little girl runs excitedly to her mom and says "mommy I''ve figured out another use for your special shower pom!" The mother is confused and asks what does she mean, the little girl then replied "I saw daddy clean his teeth with the babysitter''s pom the other day!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a grandfather clock and your grandma''s favourite breakfast? The letter L', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you eat a sub sandwich on a submarine, what do you eat on a train? A pastrainmi sandwich.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked a sailor for directions to a brothel. [NSFW] He pointed to a building and said "Thar she blows"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a library and asked for a book on suicide The librarian replied "Fuck off! You won''t bring it back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dwarf girlfriend went to work this morning upset with me. My dwarf girlfriend went to work this morning upset with me, because I''ve been taking the piss out of her size. So I''m going all out to make it up to her tonight. I''ve got a good bottle of wine in and bought her the latest dvd box set of her favourite programme. When she gets in from work I''m going to order her favourite takeaway for her tea, then go upstairs and run her a nice hot sink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday I crashed my car into a midget He got out and said "I''m not happy" I replied "Which one are you then?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What good did the Trump administration do for the American public? Public health. With all the marches Trump triggers, the average American person has never been more fit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Science have confirmed that humans can consume extremely poisonous materials and even drink molten lava **Once**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I threw my sandal at the light switch to turn it off, but I missed.. It was a complete flip - flop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is this possible? Whenever I say something bad, I get in trouble, but... Whenever Donald Trump says something bad, he gets more supporters!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Soviet Russia and Deadpool? In Soviet Russia, x find you In Deadpool, X Gon'' Give It To Ya', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Donald Trumps favorite song? ICE ICE baby', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of the cakes is missing from my German cake stall... ... I''m worried that it was stollen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate libras Them and their media are destroying this country!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why isn''t Batman black? Because then he wouldn''t be able to go to a store without Robin''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you ever feel like your life is meaningless and pointless Just remember that someone out there is fitting indicators on BMWs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Chinese anti-vaxxer? Wu Ping Coff', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a circus and a strip club? The circus has cunning stunts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the confessional at church Man: Father i have sinned. Father: What have you done my son? Man: I had sex with my wife. Father: That is not a sin, you are married to this woman. Man: I know, but I did it from behind. Father: My son, that is fine, the Lord understands human needs. Man: But father, i did it while her head was in the freezer. Father: As long as it was consensual between you and your wife you have not sinned. Go now and say a Hail Mary and the Lords Prayer. Man: Thank you father.. Oh and I would recommend that you dont buy any frozen veg at the supermarket, they banned us for some reason...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My name is Ezra. Spelling my name is easy... r, a', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Pakistani hospital and a terrorist camp? We don''t fund hospitals in Pakistan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sticky? Crap, I forgot the punchline.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blanket say when it fell of the bed? Oh Sheeet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why has nobody heard of the new band 1023 megabits? They don''t have any gigs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens to a frog''s car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two peasants turned vampire hunters entered the local cemetery.... ...Looking for the dreaded vampire that threatened their homes. As they searched among the tombstones, they found one covered in blood, black as night and decorated with a bat motif. As night fell, they begun excavating it, getting to the coffin just as the last rays of the sun began to disappear. They threw it open, stakes at the ready but found it empty. Off to the right, a small ordinary tombstone began to tremble and out burst the vampire! As he closed on the helpless pair he laughed saying, "Ah-HA! You fools! You have made a *grave mis-stake!*" *sorrynotsorry*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Muslim and a terrorist? I don''t know, I just sign executive orders. I''ll be here all week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Its not a Muslim ban. Trump: "Its not a Muslim ban there are plenty of other Muslim countries that weren''t banned. Its definitely not a Muslim ban" Darth Bannon: "No its not but its a good start"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hi do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were stranded on a desert island, what would you bring with you? I would take one for the team and bring Donald Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Muslim, a Mexican, and Trump are walking down the beach..... ....when the Muslim stubs his toe on a lamp. The Mexican picks it up, and Trump rubs it. Out of the lamp comes a Genie saying "the three of you have set me free, so shall the three of you be granted a wish." The Muslim says, "I wish for all my Muslim people to be happy, healthy, and at home in the Middle East." *Poof* all the Muslim people are back in the Middle East. The Mexican says, "I wish for all my Mexican people to be happy, healthy, and at home in Mexico." *Poof* all the Mexican people are back in Mexico. Trump then looks at the Genie and asks, "All the Muslims and Mexicans are out of America?" The Genie responds, "Yes, they are all happy, healthy, and at home." Trump narrows his eyes and growls, "Build the walls."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say comedy comes from a dark place. That''s why farts are so funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son told me he''s transgender... So that makes me transparent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s long and hard and full of seamen? A submarine, you pervs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hi Reddit. I am David Miller, head of the American Lung Foundation. Asthma anything', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a redhead and a brunette are stranded on an island... Suddenly, the brunette spots land not far from the island. She tells the other two: "I''ll swim there and come back with help" But as she is swimming, she gets tired a quarter of the way there and swims back. The redhead says: "Don''t worry, I''m confident in my ability to swim there and come back with help" But she gets tired a third of the way there and swims back. The blonde says: "You guys are weak. I''m sure I can get there and come back" But she gets tired halfway there, turns around and swims back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Old Tamil Joke An elephant befriends an ant. One day, they decide to take a walk. They''re chatting and having a fun time when the elephant is suddenly hit by a car. The drivers rushes off, leaving the badly injured elephant bleeding helplessly. Blood pours out of his wounds at an alarming rate, but the ant still tries to reassure his friend. "We can go to the hospital! They can save you." The ant promises. "I''ll die from blood loss before we get there." "Don''t worry," the ant says. "I''ll donate my blood!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know how it feels to be a noble gas. No one wants to bond with me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do stars make such good comedians? Because they''re gas!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does your asshole every get jealous... Of the amount of shit that comes out of your mouth?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dirty I like my women how i like my wood dead and wet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little three year old boy is sitting on the toilet A Little Three Year Old Boy Is Sitting On The Toilet. His Mother Thinks He Has Been In There Too Long, So She Goes In To See What''s Up. The Little Boy Is Sitting On The Toilet Reading A Book. But About Every 10 Seconds Or So He Puts The Book Down, Grips Onto To The Toilet Seat With His Left Hand And Hits Himself On Top Of The Head With His Right Hand. His Mother Says: "billy, Are You All Right?you''ve Been In Here For A While... Billy Says: "i''m Fine, Mommy.. I Just Haven''t Gone ''doody'' Yet." Mother Says: "ok, You Can Stay Here A Few More Minutes.but, Billy, Why Are You Hitting Yourself On The Head?" Billy Says: "works For Ketchup."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What three, two letter words, mean small? Is it in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two fruits who wanted to run away and get married? Turns out they cantaloupe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s an oyster''s favorite band? Pearl Jam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('January is national stalking awareness month... That crept up on my fast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arguing with a woman is like reading the Software License Agreement In the end, you ignore everything and click "I Agree".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican man has been running away from the cops for 3 days... The authorities stated that he is a Juan-ted man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a centi-peed a pint, how much would a precipice piss? A sheer drop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband sent a text to wife at night Husband sent a text to wife at night, Hi I will get late, plz try and wash all my dirty clothes And make sure you prepare my favorite dish before I return. He sent another text, I forgot to tell u that I got an increase in My salary at the end of month Im getting u a new car She text back, Omg really? Husband Replied: No I just wanted to make sure u got my 1st msg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday... A week later, he told me it was the most violent book he ever read.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m reading an interesting book about Electromagnetic Levitation I can''t put it down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can think of one benifit global warming might bring... LA will be under water if we keep it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican cartel asked a hacker for help Hacker: Sorry guys, I can''t crack this.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Has anyone tried... Turning Donald Trump off and then on again?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BREAKING: Messi has just been substituted by a noob player, these are the words of the coach post-game! "Ah woops, wrong sub"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man at a job interview A man walks into an office for a job interview. The employer asks a few questions to the man, He finishes and says he has 1 final question "what is your biggest flaw?" The man immediately replies "I''m unpredictable!" The employer gulps and says "really?" The man has an evil smirk and locks the door... The man than says ........... "Yeah"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I beat my addiction I''m addicted to my wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Ed''s girlfriend go? Sheeran away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a seatbelt and a condom? One of them prevents lives being **lost** in an accident and the other prevents lives being **made** in an accident.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yoda was scared of 7 because..... 6, 78.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by eating my friend''s sandwich wrong sub', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my Mexican friend if he was upset about Trump''s wall... He said, "Eh, I''ll get over it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking: Spelling Bee Official Pronounced Dead. He then used it in a sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] How many times in your life have you masturbated? Beats me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear? The toilet was stolen at my local police station. The cops have nothing to go on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say America runs on Dunkin... That''s why I always risk my life crossing 3 busy lanes of traffic for my large iced, extra extra.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today Trump consulted his alter ego about lifting the ban.. Yep, Bannon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NSFW-My wife asked me to spice things up in the bedroom Apparently pouring cayanne pepper up her snatch isn''t what she had in mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a dead baby and a apple? I don''t ejaculate on a Apple before I eat it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? Don''t worry, she didn''t, either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Joke My Joke: Back in he Old West there were these 2 cowboys Mike and Larry. And one day they''re talking and come to the conclusion that they''re both sick of punching cows. They wander off, it''s hard to rope them, they''re BIG and dangerous, etc. So they discuss what other animals they could herd and after much discussion Mike has the bright idea of herding chickens! Yes, they are small, they stick together, and there''s plenty of food for them to eat. So they get a bunch of chickens and herd their flock all over the west. One day, they enter Dodge City with their flock, but as they''re going down main street, a bunch of cowboys start laughing at them and throwing eggs, etc. So Mike says to Larry....I think we better get the flock out of Dodge..................z', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a gold-plated Ferrari and free-range chicken ranch? The chicken ranch has the cocks on the outside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate talking with Jewish people It really takes me out of Mein Kampfort zone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the hobo gangster? Word on the street is he''s roofless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who has killed more indians than John Wayne? Union Carbide Corporation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the front page political tooting on reddit? Trumpit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Age is just a number... wrong, its a word', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Playing Pinball at an Arcade I was playing pinball while in an arcade, I guess I was doing good because a little kid was watching me. My ball got stuck, and the kid saw, and shook the machine causing the game to think I was cheating. I was so tilted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hold my beer. -2017', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marylou.... A husband was sitting quietly reading his paper one morning, peacefully enjoying himself, when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the back of the head with a huge frying pan. "What the heck was that for!" he asked. She replies, "I found a piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Marylou written on it..." "Oh, dear, remember two weeks ago when I went to the horse races? Well, Marylou was the name of one of the horses I placed a bet on." The explanation seems to appease her, and she leaves the room to go about her business. Three days later, the man is again sitting in his chair reading the morning paper. His wife abruptly hangs up the telephone and then whacks him on the back of the head with the huge frying pan. "What the heck did I do wrong this time!" he asked. She answered, "Your horse just called!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We, the American people have a great sense of humor. Have you seen our President?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone stole my mood ring, And I don''t know how to feel about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fish went swimming. And it drowned. *My 4 year old daughter has just told me her first "joke". She finds it hilarious. "You get it? Fish cant drown. Thats funny!" I''m worried..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Taliban Outpost and a Pakistani School? I don''t know, why don''t you ask the 50 drone pilots on this sub?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirates favorite toy?? Aarrrh sea boats.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like my ice cream... Rich, thick, and occasionally headache-inducing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young bear cub was roaming the jungle . An animal he had never seen before comes strolling out of the trees. He asks " excuse me what kind of animal are you?" The animal replys " well, I am a tiger" The bear acts suprised and says " are you sure? You don''t look like a tiger." The tiger says " Do you think I''m a lyin?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross professor trelawney with human rights issues? American sybill liberties union', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Darling, I''m sorry but I just didnt like it Little Johnny once bought his Grandma a very nice, luxurious toilet brush for her birthday. But when he went to visit her a couple of weeks later, it wasn''t in the bathroom. Little Johnny asked his Grandma, Gran, what happened to the toilet brush I gave you? Darling, I''m sorry but I just didnt like it. It was too scratchy. After all those years, Ive gotten used to the toilet paper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anybody see that movie about the dog who befriends a dolphin? A Dog''s Porpoise', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can''t find any batteries for my vibrator What a buzz kill!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sandwich walked into the bar The sandwich walked into the bar. It sat on the counter and asked for a banana. The waiter said, "Sorry Sir, we don''t serve food here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the new movie where Donald Trump becomes a bug? It''s called "President Weevil"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many members of a given ethnic group does it take to change a lightbulb? A finite number! One to to change the bulb, the rest to act in a manner stereotypically derogatory to their ethnicity!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On Pokemon Go, I caught a rare Pepe the Frog. It unexpectedly evolved into Pee Pee the President... It learned Water Gun, Heal Block, and Can''t Escape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a Cadillac like a Woman? Cause when it''s cold in the morning and you need them the most....they won''t turn over.........z', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the people who pronounce ''Pangea'' with a hard ''g'' instead of the soft one? For the confused, I''m talking about consonantal drift.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a ninja''s favorite band? Five Finger Death Punch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know using too many commas is now illegal.... You can end up with a very lengthy sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know that tingly sensation you get when you like somebody? That''s common sense leaving your body. Edit: now I know what people mean when they say "RIP inbox".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the moose say after leaving a gay bar??? Man, I cant believe i just blew 50 bucks in there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who was Bill Cosby''s favorite character in the 1991 film "Hook"? RUFIO! RUFIO! RU-FI-OOO!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to wear polarized glasses until I released they made me focus too far to the left or the right...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So the creator of Pac Man died today... I guess he''s the ghost now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do spinach and hard anal sex have in common? If you were forced to have it as a kid, you''ll hate it as an adult.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If John Cena stars in a cooking show,what would it be called? Snackdown Live', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What comes after 69? Mouthwash', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recently divorced supermodel puts out an ad for a new partner The ad states that there are three requirements: can''t beat me, you can''t run around on me, and must be good in bed. 20 minutes after she puts out the ad, she hears a ring on the doorbell. She opens the door and sees a man with no arms and no legs sitting in a wheelchair. She says "What are you here for?" he responds "you put out an ad in the newspaper, right?" she says "do you think you meet the requirements?" he pauses and says "I have no arms, so I can''t beat you, and i have no legs, so I can''t run around on you" she says "there''s another requirement, are you good in bed?" he says "well how do you think I rang the doorbell?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat That when you were born there was a birthquake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like McAfee antivirus Disabled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the pie go to the dentist? It needed a filling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded in a desert... A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded in a desert, when they come across a magical lamp, which the blonde then rubs repeatedly. A genie then comes out of the magic lamp, and promises to grant one wish for each of the girls. The brunette says "I just want to go home!" she is then teleported back home, safe and sound. The redhead says "I want to go back home!" she is also teleported back home. The blonde then says "I just wish my friends were here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a man of strong convictions. The District Attorney in this town is pretty good.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two scientists are studying a nest of newly-hatched crows.. The new parents are doing what they can, and the three chicks are noisy and demanding. One day, the scientists notice that one of the chicks isn''t making noise anymore. They see he''s making the motions, but no sound is coming from his beak. The scientists decide to do something to try to help, since they reason that crows use their voices for social interaction well as for warning others of potential harm. It''s got his own good. They take the baby crow from the nest, and run a series of tests, and scans. They administer medicines, and even try some other therapies that are less traditional, but for all they do, the baby crow still cannot make a sound. Finally, they concede defeat, and had to admit to themselves that it was just a... Lost caws... Made this up today after I saw "lost cause" on a license plate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m dating a palm tree. It''s nothing serious though. Just fronds with benefits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little marry poppins Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and red all over? The slowest zebra on the prairie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What to you call an Asian lady''s private parts? A vachina.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blackout in neighborhood last night... Police told us to wait until they shot him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Kellyanne Conway eat for lunch? Alternative snacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Starbucks is trying to hire a lot more refugees Those poor art majors are going to suffer, then', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brother and sister are fucking in her room when their dad walks in... And says, "You slut, you''re just like your mother!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday a clown held the door open for me I thought it was a nice jester', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When asking a basic white girl if she wants some Starbucks, the short answer will always be "yas" The long answer is probably going to be "yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nintendo Switch to PC.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats got 2 legs and bleeds? half a cow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should the real name for a colonoscopy be? A colonoscopoo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the recent political events all my friends were like "we''re going to rally" And I was like why are you going to North Carolina there''s nothing to do there it''s so boring.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anyone ever try Canadian Bacon? I hear it''s the nicest bacon around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Harry Potter''s best friend and his pot? Nothing, they''re both cauldron.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just read a funny joke about the movie Ground Hog Day... I just read a funny joke about the movie Ground Hog Day...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a lover and an electric guitar have in common? You''ll get a lot of feedback if you''re not fingering them correctly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are morbidly obese people and child molesters alike? Both want to get into smaller pants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What d''you get if you cross a mountain climber with a mosquito? You can''t cross a scalar with a vector.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do drug dealers get punished by Islamic-Extremist Terrorist in the Middle East? They get stoned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy is having sex with a girl and it feels terrible It doesn''t feel wet or smooth but more like rough and dry. He finally asks her what''s going on down there and she says "Oh sorry about that, be right back." She goes into the bathroom for a minute and comes back out, they start having sex again. Now it''s nice and wet, smooth, and feels great. The guy says "That feels great, what did you do?" She replies "I pulled the scabs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The guy who used to bully me in middle school still takes my lunch money. On the other hand, he makes great Subway sandwiches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to study Computer Science but then I stopped... Turns out its just a sudo science.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a oral and rectal thermometer? The taste', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between someone who makes wooden furniture and someone who does paint jobs? One is a carpenter and one is a car painter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got into a fight with my girlfriend the other day She was saying a bunch of generic stuff like ''I need to learn to let things go'' and ''I always keep things bottled up inside'' and ''I make her feel trapped.'' I had to interrupt her pretty quickly and tell her "you can drop all the hints you want, I''m not letting you out of this basement".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At this point... AIDS is worried about testing positive for Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do spiders find significant others? They use a web-based dating service.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with intellectual difficulties is in a basement staring at the door. Downstairs at the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you tell a German who wants to know the time? Nine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny: Mommy, what''s a transsexual? Mom: I think you should ask Aunt Dave that question.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got in touch with my inner self today. Thats the last time I''m buying 1 ply toilet paper at the dollar store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have the body of a 20 year old model, But it takes up too much room in my freezer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to cheer my mentally challenged friend up... ...but I guess I shouldn''t have said "Don''t let an extra chromosome get you down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is called the president of a packaging company? The Boxx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a normal shower and a golden shower? I don''t drink everything that comes out of the spout of a normal shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Peach mad at Mario? He forgot to delete his Bowser history.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone with a rubber toe? Roberto', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] what did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whether you like it or not Whether you like it or not, he''s the man in charge. And I have to say, so far I agree with almost every decision he has made. Some of those decisions have been very controversial, and I know a lot of people don''t like him, but he has surrounded himself with some of the greatest minds and most talented people in the world. I''m confident that history will judge him as one of the best, if not the very best this country has ever seen. And there''s absolutely no denying his amazing leadership qualities. I know not everyone is going to agree with me, but these are just a few of the reasons I love Bill Belichick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? One', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that Fedex is soon to acquire rival company UPS. After the merger it will be called Fed-Up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl realised that she had grown hair between her legs. She got worried and asked her mom about that hair. Her mom calmly said, That part where the hair has grown is called Monkey, be proud that your monkey has grown hair. &. the girl smiled. At dinner, she told her sister, My monkey has grown hair. Her sister smiled and said, Thats nothing, mine is already eating bananas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a particularly crabby Chinese grandma? A crust-asian. ^(I''m sorry....)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a pimp use to water his plants? Hoes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a gay horse eat? Haaaaayyyy What does a black horse eat? Hay motherfucker!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the duck go to rehab? (Different answer than normal) He wanted to quack down on his drug usage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a priest walks into a bar... Looks at the ugly walls, and says to the bartender: "My son, you must repaint".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend said she was "Bi". Little did I know she meant bipolar...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the father of a transgender invisible? Because he was a transparent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You look like Helen Brown. I look better in blue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I JUST SAW A SEA COW CHANGING COLOR!! OH THE HUE MANATEE!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Food is like dark humor Not everyone gets it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bum comes up to the front door of a very expensive house and taps gently on the door When the rich owner answers, the bum asks him, "Please, sir, could you give me something to eat? I haven''t had a good meal in several days." The owner says, "I have made a fortune in my lifetime by supplying goods for people. I''ve never given anything away for nothing. However, if you go around the back, you will see a gallon of paint and a clean paint brush. If you will paint my porch, I will give you a good meal." So the bum goes around back and a while later he again knocks on the door. The owner says, "Finished already? Good. Come on in. Sit down. The cook will bring your meal right in." The bum says, "Thank you very much. But there''s something that I think you should know. It''s not a porch you got there. It''s a BMW."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 4999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar... Ouch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you want to here a joke about the Jonestown Massacre? It has quite the Punch Line. edit: *hear. I blame autocorrect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the differebce between an Afghani Military Base and a Pakistani Elementary School? I don''t know, I just fly the drone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is light beer like having sex in a canoe on the river? Both are fucking close to water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t a blonde dial 911? She can''t find the 11.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Gordon Freeman experience when he turned 40? A Half Life crisis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you have to work tomorrow, call in sick. If your boss says "Well you don''t sound sick." Say, "Well I''m fucking my sister; that sound sick enough for ya?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There comes a time in a man''s life when he has to choose: either stand up for what he believes, or stay down on his knees. On mass, that time comes about a hundred times, and the decision is always made out of peer pressure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Politics] Trump: ''The less immigrants we bring in the better'' Pence: ''The fewer'' Trump: ''I told you not to call me that yet''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Poles need to cut tree? 96 and a plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what''s the difference between a black man and a box of donuts one of them''s already full of holes before the cops see them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best computer for producing music? A Dell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the Cannibal eat the Politician? Because he was full of shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going through my wardrobe, trying to select a suit for my grandmother''s funeral. I said, "What shall I wear?" "I don''t really care," said my mum. "As long as you don''t you stick out." It''s not easy being a necrophiliac.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that Trump is writing a book? It''s called "My Struggle"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son didn''t want to study So I teached him a lesson', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who built King Arthur''s round table? Sir Cumference', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An airplane was about to crash with 4 passengers on board. An airplane was about to crash. There were 4 passengers on board, but only 3 parachutes. The 1st passenger said, "I am Russell Westbrook and I''m averaging a triple double. The Thunder and my millions of fans need me, and I can''t afford to die." So he took the 1st pack and left the plane. The 2nd passenger, Donald Trump, said, "I am the newly-elected US President, and I am the smartest President in American history, so my people don''t want me to die." He took the 2nd pack and jumped out of the plane. The 3rd passenger, the Pope, said to the 4th passenger, a 10 year old schoolboy, "My son, I am old and don''t have many years left, you have more years ahead so I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute." The little boy said, "That''s okay, Your Holiness, there''s a parachute left for you. America''s smartest President took my backpack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it''s hilarious.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s to virgins Thanks for fucking nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone gave a handjob to Albert Einstein... What a stroke of genius!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black guy eating KFC? A bandwagonner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did God invent colour blindness? A: So someone will fancy the ginger kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People always ask me what my wife does for a living, but it''s just too hard for me to say. You see... She sells sea shells by the sea shore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would the Greek gods have been like without their leader? Zeusless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump Executive Order #16 Trump: From now on, 2+2 will equal 5. Reuters: But that can''t be right, 2+2=4. We proved that, too! Trump: You can say 2+2=4, but this is alternative math.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve got an annoying habit of quoting Elton John lyrics... ...I hope you don''t mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you read Donald Trump''s book, The Art of the Deal? It has four chapter 11s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quitting smoking is sooooo easy, I do it all the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife called me at work today. "Honey, do you want to come home at lunch for a quickie?" "Sarah, it''s pronounced Quiche."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Israeli, German, Russian, and American doctors were talking ... An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President...Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde, Brunette, and Redhead all meet at the Stairway to Heaven... An angel at the top says, "I''m going to tell a joke to you all. If you do not laugh, you may advance one stair, but if you DO laugh, you''ll fall off into Hell." The angel tells the 1st joke and the women do not laugh. They all advance. The angel tells the 2nd joke and the Redhead laughs, and she falls off the Stairway. On the 6th joke, the Brunette laughs and falls of the Stairway. After all 15 jokes, the Blonde makes it all the way up the stairs. The angel cheers, "Congratulations! You made it into Heaven!" The Blonde begins to laugh hysterically. "Why are you laughing?" The angel asks. The Blonde responds while trying to pull herself together, "I just got the 1st joke...!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Guinevere say to king Arthur after sex? "You Camelot".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Imagine there was a government agency called Planned Parenthood that euthanized old racists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are turning into good drivers! So if you''re a good driver, watch out for women turning!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Buddhist asks a hot dog vendor to "Make me one with everything." The Buddhist gives him a fifty and the vendor just pockets it. The Buddhist asks for change and the vendor replies, "Change comes from within."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My favorite english writer is Dickens JK Rowling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Armageddon Knocking Knock! Knock! Who''s there? Armageddon . . . Hello? Knock knock! Um ... who''s there? Armageddon!! . . . Hello? Knock! Knock! Um ... who''s there? ARMAGEDDON! Um ... Armageddon who? ARMAGEDDON tired out here! Open the GOD-DAMNED door!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many people say we are what we eat Yet the same people say that cannibals act like animals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s favorite video game? *Papers, Please*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Ghosts favorite porn? Boo-Kake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hotel owner, radio host, and a banker walk into the situation room. Fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend was sad that her dog died so I went out and got her an identical dog Then she said "what the hell am I going to do with two dead dogs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had a blood test the other day. I did really well, A+', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life found on Mars!! The rover Curiosity found what appears to be an early marsupial ancestor of the American possum. Unfortunately, the rover Opportunity ran over it the day before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter how good are you doing something There''s always an asian that can do it with eyes closed. With love, An auto-racist Asian', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is this new band everyone is talking about? Some muslim band is all over the news!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m torn: on the one hand, I absolutely hate xenophobia, sexism, and racism on the other hand, orange is my favorite color.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grape threw a huge outdoor party on a hot, sunny day... It was raisin'' the roof.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two prisoners wanted to escape prison... But there were a 100 fences between them and freedom, they decided to jump the fences. when they had jumped 99 fences one of them says "i''m tired, let''s go back".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know a rapper was raised by lesbians? "Yo I gotta give a shoutout to my moms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m going to set up a Kickstarter for all the trump protestors... Not to donate to them, for them to donate to me. That way I can afford to take off work and do something as meaningful...like rocket league or GTA online', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Middle East theme song oh ohhhh... I''m an alien... I''m a legal alien... I am Iranian getting kicked out of New York...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my Biology professor if he had any patients. He didn''t seem too thrilled with me after that...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m an auto mechanic... So I can safely say I don''t understand the gay agenda. But I do understand the Trans mission.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was reading a Bible story to his young children He said: The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt. His son asked, What happened to the flea?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would happen, if IT technic became a doctor? Patient: I can''t bend my knee. Doctor: [*bends his knee*] Weird, works fine for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s mexican for fucked ? Deported', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally convinced mom to watch anime to prove it''s not childish and immature at all. But it''s weird to watch hentai with your parents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finished eating lunch No joke just wanted to tell someone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where can I buy donkey hide as a gift? Ass skin for a friend', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Pakistani school and a terrorist camp? I don''t fucking know I''m just a drone pilot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an elf that won''t shut up? Gobby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('AN ODD TALE There was once a man named Odd. People made fun of him because of his name so he decided to keep his gravestone blank when he died. Now when people pass by the burial site, they point and say, "That''s odd."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was young I asked my mum what a couple was she said,"oh two or three." And she wonders why her marriage didn''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked into a bar... and I said to the Bartender: *Bartender, may I please have a Rum and Coke?* The bartender replied: *I''m sorry, we only have Pepsi, is that okay?* I replied: *That''s fine.* So he poured me a Pepsi and Coke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey. But I turned myself around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many union construction workers does it take to change a lightbulb? Twelve. Two to drive the lightbulb across the state, one to supervise, two to hold "stop/slow" signs, one to make sure traffic cones are arranged alphabetically, one to actually change the lightbulb, and 5 to stand around with hands in their pockets. With union breaks every 30 minutes it should take no more than 2 weeks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between American Women and Muslim Women? The American Women gets stoned before she has sex', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were there so many protestors in CA this weekend? Because they were able to turn all that new water into whine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two muffins are in the oven. One muffin says to the other "It sure is hot in here". The other exclaims " AHHHH! A talking muffin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve searched high and low for my brother''s killer but nobody is willing to do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Menstruation jokes aren''t funny. They''re bloody hilarious!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My new bank is awesome. It''s called condensation savings and loan. They give credit where credit is dew. Edit: typo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I made a deal that whoever woke up first on our anniversary, would have to wake the other with oral sex... I still don''t know why she woke up screaming with my dick in her mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does the Lone Ranger take his garbage? To the dump, to the dump, to the dump-dump-dump!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are women and children evacuated first in a disaster? So we can think about a solution in silence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a thief and a comedian? At least thieves are known for stealing other people''s shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('called UPS in Germany today to ask when they were shipping my Oculus Rift they said "VR ready"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 89 year old man visits his doctor "Hey Doc, I am really concerned. I am together with this beautiful 21 year old, and to satisfy her in bed I have to take my Viagra pills. You''d ought to think that I am no longer capable of breeding given my age, but somehow my girlfriend just got pregnant. How can that be?". "Let me tell you a little story." the doctor said. "Once upon a time there was a hunter who was going out hunting. In a hurry he managed to grab his umbrella instead of his rifle. When he found his prey, a deer, he took the shot just as he realised he had brought his umbrella instead. Still, the deer fell and died. How could that be?" The doctor asked. "Well, it''s obvious. Someone else took the shot!" The man explained. "My point exactly". Edit: Formatting', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the Chinese Zodiac it is the Year of the Cock. So it makes perfect sense that Donald Trump is president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a man says to his friend... "I can use my penis as a weapon!" "How?" "Well we live in the UK so you are only allowed to have a blade that is less than 3 inches!" (Note: I don''t know if this is true or not, I just saw the blade fact somewhere and I remembered it.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny: "Grandma, make a sound like a Frog." Grandma: "Why?" Little Johnny: "Cause daddy says we''ll make a lot of money when you croak."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m about to eat lunch. No joke just wanted to tell someone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t black people go on cruises? They''re not falling for that one again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married couple was watching volleyball game at a beach when the wife spotted a couple in the bleachers. They were being very affectionate. The girl was running her hands all over the boyfriend and nibbling on his ear. He had his hands on her chest. Looking at them, the wife said to her husband "I don''t know whether to watch them or the game." Husband said, "Better watch them! You already know how to play volleyball."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife''s ass smells like sardines and old milk. I''m not joking.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like grapes. Some age like fine wine. Some age like raisins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A government employee sat in his office A government employee sat in his office, and out of boredom, decided to see what was inside his old filing cabinet. He poked through the contents and came across an old brass lamp. "This will look good on my mantel," he said, and took it home with him. While polishing the lamp, a genie appeared and, as usual, granted him three wishes. "I would like an ice-cold Coke right now." He gets his Coke and drinks it. Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second wish. "I wish to be on an island with beautiful women, who find me irresistible." Suddenly, he''s on an island with gorgeous women eyeing him lustfully. He tells the genie his third and last wish. "I wish I''d never have to work again." Instantly, he was back in his government office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I did some shrugs in the gym. After someone asked me, "What are you doing here?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the karate kid train with his girlfriend? Wax on, fap off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer. "Certainly, Sir , that''ll be one cent." One Cent?" the man exclaimed. He glanced at the menu and asked: "How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?" "A nickel," the barman replied. "A nickel?" exclaimed the man. "Where''s the guy who owns this place?" The bartender replied: "Upstairs, with my wife." The man asked: "What''s he doing upstairs with your wife?" The bartender replied: "The same thing I''m doing to his business down here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A busload of politicians were driving down a country road A busload of politicians were driving down a country road, when suddenly the bus ran off the road and crashed into an old farmer''s barn. The old farmer got off his tractor and went to investigate. Soon he dug a hole and buried the politicians. A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus and asked the old farmer where all the politicians had gone. The old farmer told him he had buried them. The sheriff asked the old farmer, "Lordy, were they ALL dead?" The old farmer said, "Well, some of them said they weren''t, but you know how them crooked politicians lie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A muslim walks into US Just kidding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asks her class... "Can anyone tell me the name of Robin Hood''s girlfriend?" Little Paddy raises his hand and says "Yes Miss, it''s Trudy Glenn" "No Paddy, the answer is Maid Marion" "But Miss, what about the song? "Robin Hood, Robin Hood, riding Trudy Glenn!""', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If God called your cell phone, would you answer? Yes, but only to ask why my dick is so small.... Why God Whyyyyyyyyy why do I have such a small dick!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I could never go to acting school... There''s way too much drama.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a box of chocolates... ...You''re probably not going to finish it all if you''re diabetic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what is the stupidest animal in the jungle? The Polar Bear...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhinoceros? Hell if I know. Edit: ''Elephino.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Batman''s favourite Pokmon? Cubone, because they both don''t have parents :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife was wondering if we should wash dishes by hand, in order to save a little money. I figure that using the dishwasher uses more electricity, but less water. So overall it''s a wash.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Triceratops die out? Because they couldn''t find any Tricerabottoms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a job interview the other day... I went to a job interview the other day. The interviewer asked the question ''''what are your strengths?'''', to which I replied, honestly all I''m good at is telling jokes and fucking kids. Safe to say I got the job as a BBC TV presenter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As Dumbledore stood there stroking his wand Harry regretted transferring to Catholic School', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a pizza and a hoe? You don''t pick the crust off a pizza before you eat it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Becoming a vegetarian... Is a huge missed steak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before my Girlfriend moved in I had one night stand... Things are getting pretty serious, we now have two night stands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do feminists hate the postal service? Because they deliver straight white mail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of people in this world The ones who understands binary and the ones who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A stoned bird A stoned bird was flying when it hit a moving car. The driver stopped, found the bird and took it home to treat it. When the bird is awake in his new cage, he looked around and thought: the jail?!! Did the driver die?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What school did Darth Vader attend? Univer-sith-y ... I''ll let myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If history has taught us anything, then it the fact that human beings cant take care of the world and its all down to shit. So let''s try a monkey to govern us all - every Trumpling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife messed with my charging cable... I was shocked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one hat say to the other? You stay here, I''m going on ahead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ocean''s 8 is expected to come out in late 2017 but probably won''t be ready until at least 30 minutes after that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call your Japanese wife? A rice cooker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between M&Ms and America? M&M got rid of the tan ones years ago', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the green man lives in the green house, the red man lives in the red house and the blue man lives in the blue house. Who lives in the white house? The orange man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the Chinese Vicar introduce herself? By singing "I''m Asian Grace."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you elope? You can''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Hadrian so popular? Because he built a huge wall to keep the invaders out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about those new corduroy pillows? They are making headlines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would you call it if Natalie Portman starred in Lorenzo''s Oil? Lack Schwann', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was a smoker for 10 years until I decided to quit cold turkey I never thought to heat it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad told me about the birds and the bees today... Then he gave me a broom and told me to clear them out of the attic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one earthquake say to the other? Was that your fault or mine?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every cheese joke I know What did the cheese say when he looked in the mirror? Halloumi What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of a cave? Camembert What type of cheese is made backwards? Edam Which cheese doesn''t belong to you? Nacho cheese Did you hear about the explosion at the cheese factory? All that was left was de-brie Why did the cheese monger fall over? He only had one Stilton How does the cheese monger cut the cheese? Caerphilly. What type of cheese can you use to hide a horse? Mascapone', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snow Day! I get to stay home owl day. It''s gonna be a hoot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta Now it''s a Ford Focus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a terrorist what would Willy Wonka scream before he carried out an attack? Nougat Chocolatebar!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never tell lawyer jokes Lawyers don''t think they''re funny, and no one else thinks they''re jokes. Credit where credit is due: I just watched a video of Kellyanne Conway doing stand-up in 1990. This is one of hers. edit: She might have got it from somewhere else of course, and this is just where I first heard it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field =', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Trumps favorite movie? Minority Report!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump always has his partner be on top during sex. Because he can only fuck up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our son was a by-product of a raunchy night in the back of a car. With one very open-minded taxi driver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the local store and I asked... "How much for a dead battery?" I asked. He responded, to my delight. No charge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some newspapers and celebs have compared Trump to Hitler... Nazi''s are outraged.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a stripper do with her asshole everyday before work? Drops him off at band practice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher asks students to use incompletely in a sentence A teacher asked the students to use incompletely in a sentence. One student raises her hand and says " my homework is incomplete". The teacher says " close but I said to use incompletely". Little johnny raises his hand but knowing little johnnys tendencies the teacher was afraid to call on him. Nobody else raised their hand so the teacher calls on johnny. Little johnny replies " when my balls hit her asshole I know I''m in completely." Appalled by the answer she sends johnny to the principal. She then asks to use the word handsome in a sentence. Little Susie raises her hand and the teacher calls on her. Susie says " when I blow johnny my mouth gets sore so I have to use my hand some."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend was unhappy that I referred to her as sloppy seconds but she was even more unhappy with Lady Leftovers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How I learned to mind my own business: I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, and all the patients were shouting, "13....13.....13." The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a little gap in the planks, so I looked through to see what was going on. Some idiot poked me in the eye with a stick, then they all started shouting, "14....14...14."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the seal go to school for? Art art art!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of bagel can fly? A plain bagel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most people have a family tree, but I have a family cactus. Because mine is full of pricks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to fix America? Unplug the power cord wait 10 seconds, plug it back again. See if it works.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the new aftershave that drives women crazy? No! Tell me about it. It smells of $50 dollar bills', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know when you''re at a gay picnic? NSFW All the hotdogs taste like shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once dated a biologist. I don''t like to brag, but I always provided her with multiple organisms to keep her happy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Capitalism has many problems but communism only has 3 - Breakfast - Lunch - Dinner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Facebook, I am not a social media person. Facebook: But- Me: FACEBOOK, I AM NOT A SOCIAL MEDIA PERSON. YOU ARE REFUSING TO HELP. GOODBYE. *Deletes Facebook, hits the gym, lawyers up, checks himself into psych ward*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Birds for sale... All of them are going cheap!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Didn''t Gandhi''s Broken Arm Repair? Because he fought the Caste system', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian, Trump and a Mexican are captured by an Amazonian tribe They are condemned to 50 hits with a stick. The Russian goes first. After the Russian gets all 50 of his hits it''s Trump''s turn. Feeling bad they give him 1 request. Trump asks them to halve his beating. After Trump was done they felt really bad for the Mexican. They gave him 2 requests. The Mexican asks them to triple his beating. Astonished, the tribe asks what is the second request. Mexican: Put Trump on my back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give it to me! Give it to me! I''m so wet! She screamed. "No," I replied, "it''s my umbrella."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have finally ruled out cats from any upcoming Mars missions cuz curiosity!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For sale: Second hand toilet paper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Double Negatives ...are no-nos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the strongest day of the year? The Summer Swollstice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dildo traveling through space at the speed of light? Genital warps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve attended anger management classes before... ... it was soon after my dads first Alcoholics Anonymous group. "Dad," I said, "there are a lot of angry people." My dad replied, "There are a lot of angry drunks, too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of photo doesn''t dissolve in water? A non-Polaroid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what a girl says when she gets a big dick inside her? no ? neither do I.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor : How is your headache? Man : She is fine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women = Time x Money Now it''s been previously proven that: **Women = Time x Money** And we all know that: **Time = Money** Which means we can infer that: **Women = Money x Money** And from our prior research we''ve identified that "*Money is the root of all evil*, i.e. we can infer: **Money = SQRT(EVIL)** So applying that to our previous results: **Women = SQRT(EVIL) x SQRT(EVIL)** Which can be reduced to: **Women = EVIL**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t people like communists? Because they have no class', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the blondes belly button all red and bruised? Because her BF was a blonde too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our local brothel just went out of business... all they left us was a sign in the window... Said "Beat it... we''re closed"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate restaurants that have quirky and confusing ways of displaying men and woman bathroom signs. I mean, what am I?!? Am I a kitchen or an exit?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Donald Trump and Donald Duck? There is a human being inside of Donald Duck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I called my son "a bloody disappointment to this family", and my wife burst into tears Apparently I shouldn''t joke about miscarriage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife accused me of ruining her birthday, but that''s impossible I didn''t even know it was her birthday!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says "Dam!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do lesbians like to camp? In a femi-nest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t understand why Obama had to give speeches behind bulletproof glass, I mean he''s black and all but I doubt he would have shot anyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a rich Iraqi say at a bar mitzvah? Mosul Toff!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst Israeli senior citizens resort? Jewrassic Park', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a four letter word pertaining to females ending in -unt? Aunt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Motherly Pride Two mothers were talking about their sons. The first said, "My son is such a saint. He works hard, doesn''t smoke, and he hasn''t so much as looked at a woman in over two years." The other woman said, "Well, my son is a saint himself. Not only has he not looked at a woman in over three years, but he hasn''t touched a drop of liquor in all that time." "My word," the first mother said. "You must be so proud." "I am," the second mother replied. "And when he''s paroled next month, I''m going to throw him a big party."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 16 year old blonde is dinning with her parents Blonde: Oh by the way Im pregnant Parents (simultaneously): Youre WHAT!?! Blonde: Geez relax and eat a chill pill, Im not even sure its mine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One chemist tells his colleague: "Dude, I created a superconductive alloy out of Potassium, Nobelium and Tungsten!! I''m going to make millions off of it!" The other chemist, jealous, says with a sigh,"Yes, I KNoW."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the fastest thing on land? Stevie Wonder''s speedboat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was sitting at the table with his two daughters Petal and Fridge. Petal said, "Dad, why is my name Petal?" Her dad answered, "Because a flower petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Then Fridge said, "HUURRGRRUWAHGUWAAAAAH!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pencil isnt prone to making Freudian Slips but my penis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife hangs up after about a half-hour on the phone A wife hangs up after about a half-hour on the phone. The husband is surprised, "Wow, that was quick - usually you girls are at it for two hours at least!" "Yeah, well, it was a wrong number."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Big explosion at the cheese factory earlier.... There was de brie everywhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a new Indian open on a boat on the canal round corner from my house... ...It''s called the Onion Barge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandpa has the heart of a lion... And a lifetime ban from the local zoo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandma and I were face timing with a bad connection So she says, "hold on, let me open the door to let some WiFi''s in." True stories can be jokes too..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a movie about premature ejaculation Coming Soon, now in theaters. EDIT: Just let me try again changing a couple of words EDIT 2: I swear this is the first time that this has happened', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump and Gordon Ramsay have in common? They both have a cabinet full of potatoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think my wife has a blind fetish... Last night she said she doesn''t think we should see each other anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s it called when you cut off Leonardo DiCaprio''s head DiCapritation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like military puns Generally, they''re very funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... And a table... then a chair...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most women would love to wake up on their birthday to the smell of fresh coffee, a nice breakfast, flowers and oral But not my Sister.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone stole my mood ring... I''m not sure how I feel about that....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many people say a diploma is just a piece of paper. I as an educated person beg to differ It''s a piece of cardboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To some people, the words "Do Not Touch" leave them terrified Especially when it''s written in Braille.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate those cocky Russian Nesting dolls They are always full of themselves', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Volkswagon were pretty dumb to name one of their cars ''Golf'' Why name a car after a slow and boring sport where the hardest part is driving', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the lovelorn college professor? He always put the course before the heart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A video of a groundbreaking bowler goes viral He still had to pay to fix the bowling lane though', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the disco: "So whats a cute girl like you doing all by herself?" "I had to fart"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Matt get a Ticket? He''s a speed Damon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the Lord said onto John... "Come forth and you shall receive eternal life" But John came fifth, and got a toaster...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish swim into a concrete wall One turns to the other and says, "Dam!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two muffins are standing in an oven Two muffins are standing in an oven, One turns to the other and says; "Boy, sure is hot in here." To which the other one replies; "OH MY GOD! A TALKING MUFFIN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit is a really green community, ...considering all the recycled content on here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Mexican Midget? A paragraph because he''s too short to be an ese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call beautiful people in india ? Tourist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, violets are blue. When it comes to flower colours, the person who made this has no clue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black guy wakes up from a coma He asks what happened. The nurse says "You blacked out"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man named Eric Cole... ... discovered that there was a direct correlation between the amount of mayonnaise on his cabbage salad and how good it tastes. He''s calling this correlation Cole''s Law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The girl i am dating, slapped me and told me to fuck off. Told her she was a gold-digger.. Apparently, that''s not a good way to call someone who work in mines, digging gold.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Go Karting with a Muslim coworker Muslim coworker: We should organise a go karting day out, I went on the weekend and it was really fun! Dan: That''s a good but isn''t it dangerous? Jack: As long as you don''t go in Ram-a-dan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump is our first POSOTUS Peice Of Shit Of The United States.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently a new casino opened in Tokyo (Japan)... It is called "Pokermon Go"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with 2 extra testicles removed them himself with a knife without anaesthesia Doing that takes some balls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a hamburger was grilled in space? It''s a little meteor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Expensive perfume A young and beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling like expensive perfume. She turns to the old Italian woman on the elevator with her and says arrogantly, "Giorgio - Beverly Hills, $100 an ounce!" Another young and beautiful woman gets on the elevator and also smells of very expensive perfume. She arrogantly turns to the old Italian woman and says, "Chanel No. 5, $150 an ounce!" About three floors later, the old Italian woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, looks both beautiful women in the eye, turns, bends over, and farts. "Broccoli - 49 cents a pound."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not cumin! Said Caraway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve done jail time for my love of fruit.. I''m a convicted grapist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tobacco companies kill their best customers And condom companies kill their future customers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why wouldn''t the lobster share his toys? Because he was... shellfish. hahahaha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sandwich and a kit Kat walk into a bar at 9-31..... ....barman says "I''m sorry, we don''t serve snacks after 9pm"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Forrest Gump''s password? 1forrest1', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman - "Which book has helped you most in your life?" The woman replied - "My husband''s cheque book !!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the company fire all of its Liberal employees and hire a bunch of illegal immigrants and Muslim refugees? The illegal immigrants and Muslim refugees actually came to work while all the Liberals shirked work to go hold signs and shout at people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was asked how I view lesbian relationships Apparently ''in HD'' isn''t the correct answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shortest joke a software developer can tell: Ill be ready soon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you can get with 57 000? A home for a refugee. Or a shit ton of beer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a couple gets into bed As a couple gets into bed, the husband starts to rub and kiss his wife. She turns over and says, "I''m sorry, honey. I''ve got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The husband sadly turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife. "Do you have a dentist appointment, too?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Final arrangements... A woman from New York was getting her affairs in order. She wrote her will and made her final arrangements. As part of these arrangements she met with her rabbi to talk about what type of funeral service she wanted. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Bloomindgales. "Bloomingdales!" the rabbi said. "Why Bloomingdales?" "That way, I am guaranteed to have my daughters visit me at least twice a week."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Matthew McConaughey set to guest edit Breibart news next week Alt-Right Alt-Right Alt-Right', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A detective shows up at a crime scene A bakery has been broken into. After some investigation, a police officer checks up on the detective. The officer asks, "How''s the investigation going?" "Not good. Hundreds of dollars worth of quality pastries have been stolen." said the detective. "I heard that there''s been a lot of thieves running around town lately." said the officer. "Sure has." the detective said. "But this one takes the cake."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What place is cleaner when Israeli Tourists get out than when they get in? A Hotel Room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack,"Our relationship is over." Jane,"Our relationship is what? Over."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hand me downs Apparently not the right way to ask the wife to hand me our disabled baby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s this I hear about a new Muslim band?? Is this something kind of explosive death metal!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a joke about paper? Never mind. It''s tearable', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s favorite word in Sign Language ddfffffddffddfffddffddddfffff', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Hitler and Trump? The mustache.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: whoever answers ............. Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. One boy throws his bag out the window. Teacher: who just threw that?! Boy: Me! Im going home now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom won''t let me eat while using her laptop anymore... Because when she caught me stroganoff I dropped my pennes on the keyboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The electromagnetic wave arrived at the hotel, when the hotelier asks... "Do you have any baggage to check in?" - "No, I''m traveling light."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I fell asleep at a party I fell asleep at a party the other night and someone put a teabag in my mouth. I went fuckin mental. No one treats me like a mug', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My gay friend really despises of fruit He cannot stand the sight of a mango.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The different between Donald Trump and Hitler If anybody can think of one! Pm me and I''ll write it in this little space here -----> [ ]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my shrink what we could work on to deal with my grandma''s passing. She said mourning would help. I said, "No thanks, I''m married."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a blonde woman in a swimsuit are stranded on a deserted island. The woman asks the man, "When was the last time you had a smoke?", she then unzips her swimsuit a little and pulls out a cigar, the man replies, "Thank you", and takes the cigar. Soon after, the woman asks the man, "When was the last time you had a drink?", she then unzips her swimsuit halfway down and pulls out a can of beer, the man replies, "Thank you my dear", and takes the can of beer. When the man had finished the beer, the woman unzips her swimsuit nearly all the way down and asks the man, "When was the last time you played around?" The man replied, "You wouldn''t have a set of golf clubs in there would you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lot of folks are concerned that Trump is president given the status of minorities. But don''t forget: Orange be the new black, baby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the diamond depressed? He had been under a lot of pressure lately.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GNU/Linux can''t run Photoshop.. unless you offer it WINE. Else you will remain stuck with a GIMPed system.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally got the "why did the chicken cross the road" joke The chicken dies and goes to the other side... it took me 19 years to get that joke...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What so you call an actor who paid of his house Mortgage freeman (i know its bad)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We need immigrants to do jobs that Americans don''t want to do... As two thirds of Trump''s wife are immigrants', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got asked why I don''t have a girlfriend... "Don''t need one" I replied "My bank account goes down on me everyday"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pirate walks into a bar Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. Bartender says "Hey Mr. Pirate, ya know you have a steering wheel in your pants?" Pirate says "Yarrrrr, it''s driving me nuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We never saw it coming. Psychiatrist: You have paranoid schizophrenia. Patient: Who! Me or me?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife and husband have bought condoms with different flavours. - Darling, I will turn off the light, put one on and you guess the flavour. As soon as he turns off the light, she takes it in the mouth and says: - Gorgonzola! - Wait, it is not on yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to give myself a sex change... ...but I couldn''t pull it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? He was outstanding in his field.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a tiny penis and a joke? My date didn''t laugh at my jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Italian that died? He pasta way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why cant you play cards on a rowboat? Because you''re sitting on the deck...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I''ve never had a garbanzo bean on my face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FOUND Ladys purse left in my car while parked. A classified ad in the paper: FOUND Ladys purse left in my car while parked. The owner can have same by paying for this ad. If she will explain to my wife how the purse got in my car, I will pay for the ad. Phone 555-xxx-7610.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A programmer goes shopping A room mate asked his friend who is a programmer to go shopping. "hey, can you buy a bottle of milk? Oh and if they have eggs, buy 12" So the programmer went shopping. When he got back, he bought 12 bottle of milk and his room mate asked "why the heck did you bought 12 bottle of milk?!" The programmer responded. "they have eggs"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Miss France just won Miss Universe The French finally won something.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: Hi, how are you? Patient: I''m well thanks. Doctor: Then get the fuck out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Carrie Fisher cross the road? She didn''t... She''s dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A close friend of mine asked me "What do you look for in a girl?" And I said "My dick, and if it''s not there then that''s gonna change."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a tumultuous couple of weeks in the spotlight and under the microscope, president Trump flies to New York to spend a night with his wife. As he is about to walk into the penthouse, he gets a call from Priebus. "Mr President", he says, "what should we do about the abortion bill" Trump, annoyed especially about the timing barks back "who gives a shit? Just fucking pay it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People don''t realize Trump is the healthiest president in our history. He''s been training his whole life to run the aryan race.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a bag of coke and a toddler Eric Clapton wouldn''t let a bag of coke fall out a window', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a hormone? Don''t pay her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and his wife are on a beach... NSFW A husband an his wife are on a date at the beach. It''s mid afternoon an him and his wife are both sun bathing. His wife casually turns on her stomach and asks "can you rub some sunscreen on my back?" He then grabs the bottle and gets on top of his wife. "Right on your back?" He asks, and she nods slightly. "What''s taking so long?" She asks, and he replies, "it''s coming honey, just rubbing my self down first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man''s adoptive daughter begins to get sexually attracted to her father... A man''s adoptive daughter begins to get sexually attracted to her father. She starts to advance on him slowly, starting with slightly skimpier clothing, and slowly moving on to blatant flirting and leaving nudes around the house. One day, the father is climbing up the stairs when he hears a strange noise. Under further investigation, it seemed like the noise was coming from his daughter''s room. He opened the door to find his daughter naked on the bed, pleasuring herself. She looks at him, only mildly startled, and continues to touch herself. "Please fuck me, Dad. I''m so horny." She sits up and spreads her legs. Her father, having been resisting temptation for months, finally caves. He rushes over and shoves her down back onto the bed. He undos his belt, unzips his pants, and leans in to whisper seductively: "Hi horny, I''m Dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I grow up and have kids... I think I will stay a virgin to set a good example.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stop it with the 9/11 jokes, my dad died in 9/11 His last words were "Allahu Akbar"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s wives were immigrants. Proving again that immigrants will do jobs Americans won''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy runs out of gasoline. Nearest gas station in 20 miles out, so he unzips and fills up with pee. Cop driving by stops him and asks is this normal? nope its super. .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you ever see a crow as roadkill? They always have another crow as a lookout saying "car, car, car"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking news...Justin Trudeau just announced a plan to build a wall between the US and Canada, with the US paying for the fence. ...yeah just as fucking stupid as as it sounds:(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is like the square root of -100 A perfect 10, but completely imaginary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What gets wetter the more it dries? "What?", says the interrogation suspect. "Not this."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I said to my girlfriend that she would look sexier with her hairback Apparently thats an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('North Korea bans sarcasm What a great idea!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a little girl got lost in the woods, and she sees an owl, and asks it: ''Do you know where my mother is?'' and the owl responds, ''Why the hell would I know where your mother is? Are you stupid? And why are you fairy tale children always getting lost in forests and hallucinating about animals that can talk?'' And then the owl swooped down and ripped the little girls face off and ate her eyeballs. And the the owl hooted. Who-Who.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A journalisy doing an article about life in prison He asks inmates about their daily routine Prisoner1: i wake up eat,exercice, do laundry and take a shower Prisoner2: i wake up read a book eat and after that i do laundry Prisoner3: i wake up take a shower, eat and take a walk. The journalist then asks him, dont you do laundry like the others? Prisoner3 smiling : no silly, im laundry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a difficult problem in chemistry? A chemystery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t we letting Islamic people get off at airports? I thought we wanted to keep them off our planes, not on them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just got back from Chernobyl And boy are my legs arms!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did OSHA say about this joke? NSFW', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sodium ion went to rob a bank. It was charged, without a doubt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The story of a man and his pregnant wife My wife is prego, but we like to get kinky anyway. One night things begin to get particularly saucy - I''m sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights. It''s red everywhere and she''s obviously not on her period, I look up at her glassy, jarred facial expression. Worried, I rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital, she''s still bleeding. By the time we get there she''s not bleeding much more but all color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent, almost in a vegetative state. We storm into the emergency room and explain everything to the nearest doctor. The doctor replies, "Sorry, there is nothing we can do." "WHY THE FUCK NOT??" I exclaim. "We don''t operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Kool-aid man say about Donald Trump''s proposal? OH Yeaaaaaaa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sticky? A stick. I wood''ve thought of something more original, but I tree-ly can''t be bothered, so here you go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman gets on a bus with her baby The bus driver says: "That''s the ugliest baby that I''ve ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I''ll hold your monkey for you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what the worst part is about dating a Japanese girl? If I ever decide to break up with her I will have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. Only a fraction of people will find this funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do all pharaohs have in common? Toot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I went to the protest The protesters aren''t going to mace themselves', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but how in the hell did they get in there?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A traveling companion. A guy walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm and orders, "I''ll have a pint, please. And one for the road."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I" Student: I is the.... Teacher: Stop! Never put ''is'' after an "I". Always put ''am'' after an "I". Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How dare you say I''m dumb! Would a dummy get a ''A'' on there IQ test? Hmm?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think these protesters are sending the wrong message... because they keep telling me to Love Trump''s Hate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of the most important skill my parents taught me is... How to tell what is junk mail and real mail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump says "The less immigrants we let into our country the better!" Pence, correcting Trump, says "The Fewer" Trump says "Whoa Mike don''t call me that just yet"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If there''s a sock on my doorknob... It means I''m having sex with the other one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A country that shares borderlines with 10 other countries cannot be entered because it is made of limits', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike Rowe Penis Women have told me I have a Mike Rowe penis. I guess it must be because they think it''s pretty strong and does dirty jobs... but I think it''s a little small myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys sit at a bar... One says to the other "I''ve got really bad news." "What is it?", the friend replies. "I''m HIV positive". "Really?!, that''s terrible. Is there anything I can do?". "Yea, can you tell your wife as soon as you get home".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The orphanage i run, burned down today with the lives of sixty children Thank fuck i don''t have to tell their parents ....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in my day we used to only have chalkboards. The new whiteboards they use are Remarkable', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I rather have a bottle of soda for President than Donald Trump. This way, we could truly have a Liter of the Free World.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Next time somebody calls your home phone... Say "Can I call you back? I''m driving."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked me, which is worse, ignorance or apathy? I told him, "I don''t know, and I don''t care."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All of these reposts are like kids with cancer They never get old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is better a stool or a box to stand on? You stand on a stool, though I prefer the ladder', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I called the ASPCA hotline to tell them I''d just found six Badgers in a suitcase by the side of the road "Are they moving?" asked the operator "Not sure" I replied "But that would explain the suitcase"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pasteurize: Too far to see.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Pokemon who is trying to quit smoking? Vaporeon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Going to work My boss told me yesterday, Dont dress for the job you have, dress for the job you want. But when I turned up at the office today in Ghostbusters gear, the bastard said I was fired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do alcoholics and necropheliacs have in common? They both love to crack open a cold one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dog went to a telegram office Took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, "There are only nine words here. You could send another ''Woof'' for the same price." The dog replied, "but that would make no sense at all!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the beginning there was nothing. God said, ''Let there be light!'' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats more offensive than black face? Orange face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn''t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his cell phone and calls emergency services. He gasps to the operator, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies, "Take it easy. I can help. First, let''s make sure he''s dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Favorite math topics of Karma Whores Multiplication and derivatives', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Photons aren''t Catholic. No mass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s like we''re living in a video game... "President Evil"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me I look "uncool" with a bike helmet on.. Well you know I''d rather look uncool than fall and split my head open during sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary Tyler Moore died this week. She didn''t make it after all...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old friends are camping. [nsfw] In bed, in the dark : "Are you jerking off? -Yeah. -Would you mind jacking your own dick?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns... But I soon realized that toucan play at that game', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It''s an obscure number. You''ve probably never heard of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic... But if I''m gonna have sex, it''s going to be on my own Accord.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a cocaine joke, but now I can''t find it It makes me really mad because I had it all lined up', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t communism work in a school enviroment? Because everyone would get the same Marx.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was appalled to learn about Hitler''s uprising. Anne Frankly, I did Nazi that coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Got in a fight with my boner this morning; Don''t worry i beat it single handedly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Courtney Love and a porcupine? A porcupines needle won''t give you AIDS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a horse with a horn and no balls? A Eunuchorn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the farmer start a punk rock band? He was tired of Haulin'' Oats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Colonel Sanders keep his eleven herbs and spices a secret? Because he was ashamed of them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Britney Spears addicted to the cocaine? Because Kevin fed her lines', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redditors are like alchemists. They try to turn their nonsense into gold.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the chef fired from the restaurant? He was caught cooking the books', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Bill Clinton and Donald Trump? Bill fucked fewer people in the Oval Office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Courtney Love and the American flag? It''s not proper to piss on the American flag', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? 1 less drunk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The weather forecast is looking pretty bad over in Germany. There''s a high chance of heil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexicans are upset over Trump''s wall. A lot of Mexicans are upset over Trump''s planned wall. I hope they get over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Jew and a pizza. Pizza can have pepperoni, Jews can''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Australian guy that was dancing with my computer? He was waltzing my tilde.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Nazi cetacean? Adolfin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife bought a new plant for for the house. I didn''t like it at first... ...but it''s starting to grow on me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbor caught me peeing on his lawn after a snow storm. Don''t tell me not to pee on your lawn. This is my lawn, see, it''s got my name on it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it so loud in Costco? Everything comes in high volumes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was bored with my life, and wanted to change something. I changed my mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend asked me, "Where''s my book of opera puns?" I said, "It''s overture house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Jewish man is dying at home in bed. His entire family is gathered around him. Sarah, the man calls for his wife... Im here dear. And the kids? We are all here too dad. And the grandchildren? We are all here. Well, if you are all here then why is the light in the kitchen turned on?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about trumps wall? I can''t tell you, you might not get over it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter how hard you push the envelope It still remains stationery', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once dreamed that I fell down a flight of stairs. I was so relieved when I woke up safely in the hospital.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican drug lord El Chapo has been extradited to the United States... It''s still unclear which cabinet post he''ll be appointed to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Will glass coffins be popular in future? Remains to be seen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The person who made the shovel should receive an award It was groundbreaking work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking down the street the other day and I see a man in a zoot suit checking the time on his pocket watch. I go up to him and I say, "hey, did you just come out of a time machine or something?" Hey says, "no, that''s just the wind chill, it only makes it feel like we''re in the 20''s."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say "Rise Up Lights" out loud You just said "Razor Blades" in an Australian accent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I took a practice test on photons today... It didn''t matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Hanlon''s razor, Occam''s razor, Poe''s Law and Godwin''s Law each have in common? The Donald Trump presidency.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Cant Teach an Old Dog to Fly A woman called our airline customer-service desk asking if she could take her dog on board. Sure, I said, as long as you provide your own kennel. I further explained that the kennel needed to be large enough for the dog to stand up, sit down, turn around, and roll over. The customer was flummoxed: Ill never be able to teach him all of that by tomorrow!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit is really a green community, considering all the recycled content on here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a new passion yesterday pairing socks. I guess I just enjoy bringing sole mates together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no cats on mars? Curiosity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the PowerPoint cross the road? To get to the other slide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is a lot like chess You''ve always got to be thinking two steps ahead. And most people want to be white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Even if they all unite against Trump, those seven countries won''t get off the list A seven nation army couldn''t hold Trump back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock...... You: Who''s there? .... Me: Better eat up...... You:.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rumour has it Eminem has converted to Islam. From now on, he will call himself "Muslim Shady."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My daughter just told me she''s infertile. "That''s a great joke," I said. "I can''t wait to tell it to my grandchildren."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the butter on toast? I can''t tell you, you might spread it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The propellor of a plane is actually a giant fan for the pilot When the fan stops, you can actually see the pilot start sweating', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will track you down... You have my Word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A psychiatrist was conducting group therapy with four young mothers and their small children... A psychiatrist was conducting group therapy with four young mothers and their small children. "You all have obsessions," the doctor observed. To the 1st mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You''ve even named your daughter Candy." He looks to the 2nd mother, "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child''s name, Penny." He looks to the 3rd mother. "Your obsession is alcohol. This manifests itself in your child''s name, Brandy." At this point, the 4th mother gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and says... "Come on, Dick, we''re leaving!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Shakers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Shakers can''t screw', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The day after Thanksgiving is often the biggest capitalist/materialistic shopping day every year. I''m protesting it this year, and had to think of the movement''s slogan... Black Fridays Matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An atheist is walking alone in the woods When a bear appears and starts running towards the man. The man closes his eyes and screams "Oh God help me". He opens his eyes again and the bear is standing still with his paws only inches from his face, the bear is not moving at all, almost like time stood still. A loud voice is heard from the sky. - God: Why are you calling on me now? You never believed in me before. - Man: Help me this bear is going to eat me. - God: Sorry I can not help you I only help Christian''s. - Man: Well, make me a Christian then. - God: You do not have enough faith to be a Christian, even this bear has more faith than you. - Man: Please, can you at least turn the bear into a Christian? Suddenly the bear starts to move again. The bear lowers both of its paws towards it''s chest and puts them together. The man can hear the bear say under it''s breath "Dear God thank you for this food you have provided for me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many homeless people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Homeless people can''t have light bulbs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is definition of indefinitely? When your balls are touching her ass, you are in-definatlly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked Kellyanne Conway for her email And she said "oh you mean my alternative fax?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nursery school teacher says to her class, "Who can use the word ''definitely'' in a sentence?" First a little girl says, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher says, "Sorry, Amy, but the sky can sometimes be gray, or black." A second little boy says,"Trees are definitely green." "Sorry, but in the autumn, the trees are brown." Then little Johnny from the back of the class stands up and asks, "Does a fart have lumps?" The teacher looks horrified and says, "Johnny! Of course not!!!" "OK...then I DEFINITELY just shit my pants!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m going to post a joke I hope it dosen''t get [deleted]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do female geologists do as a side job? Prostitution. They quite enjoy studying hard things!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A masochist and a sadist are doing their thing& The masochist says: "Hit me" and the sadist answers: "no&"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think babysitting was just a job teenagers did to make a quick buck Then I saw how much Kellyanne Conway makes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the math book say to the literature book? You''re so full of great stories, I''m just filled with problems', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my pies... Still warm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A happy 80 year old man goes to see his doctor Doctor: Why are you so happy? Old Man: My 19 year old wife is pregnant! Can you believe it?! Doctor: Wow, that great news! You know, I have a story to tell you. Old Man: Go ahead Doctor: I once had a friend. He would go hunting every weekend. One day he forgot to bring his gun. He brought his umbrella instead. Old Man: Ok... Doctor: He then saw a bear. Not knowing what to do, he opened the umbrella, and poof, the bear died. Old Man: How''s that possible? You can''t kill a bear with an umbrella Doctor: Exactly. Somebody else must''ve shot the bear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that the Beatles had to change the lyrics to Hello Goodbye because it was too "british". The original was "Oi Mate Piss Off"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the hardest part about your wife telling you she has AIDS? Acting surprised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man dies and goes to heaven He sees a bunch of clocks on the wall and wonders why they''re there. So he goes to ask Jesus and Jesus says "Those are lie clocks, they represent the amount of times someone has lied while they''re on earth", Jesus then shows him a clock that has only ticked one second and states "See, this is Mother Teresa''s lie clock, indicating see has only lied once". Interested the man asks where Donald Trump''s "lie clock" is, Jesus says, "Unfortunately it had to be disabled, Einstein was getting upset that the hands were moving faster than the speed of light".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say when you see a Nazi trip and fall? "Are you Alt-right?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does one go from being a doctor to an Uber driver? They move to America.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A monk is allowed to say only two words every year Per his oath of silence, a monk is only allowed to say two words every year. After his first year, he comes before the head abbot to speak his two words. "Better Food." The head abbot understands and obliges the monk, hiring a new chef and improving the food quality at the monastery. A year later, the monk appears to speak his next two words. "Warmer Blankets." The head abbot gets right on it and purchases new blankets for the monk. The next year, the monk appears once again for his annual two words. "I quit." The head abbot replies, "Well good, all you''ve done since you got here is complain."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Donald Trumps favorite basketball player? John Wall Get it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The frequency of sexual activity of senior males. The frequency of sexual activity of senior males depends on where they were born. Statistics just released from Statistics Canada and The United Nations B.O.H. Team, reveal that: North American, Australian, New Zealanders and British men between 60 and 80 years of age, will on average, have sex two to three times per week, (and a small number a lot more), whereas Japanese men, in exactly the same age group, will have sex only once or twice per year if they are lucky. This has come as very upsetting news to both me and most of my buddies at the golf club, as none of us had any idea that we were Japanese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? I was hoping you would just upvote.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Fifth Harmony was unable to perform at the NHL All Star... They can still have an option to work from home via satellite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Bill Clinton say when asked why Hillary lost? "Not sure, she never used to go down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the letters A through Y hate the Jews? Because they were Not Z.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL the current Russian President once nearly placed a bomb in a friendly naval vessel. Wait, am I Putin this in the wrong sub?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish man? Zero.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t computers have any brothers? They are all trans-sisters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus at a restaurant in Heaven... "Holy cow!" "Yes, Lord. I am both you server and your steak. How would you like me cooked?" "Well done, my good and faithful sirloin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Christian is out on the ocean when his boat capsizes... He immediately starts praying. After half an hour a boat pulls up. "Hey! Need some help?" "No thanks! God will save me!" So the boat speeds off. After another hour another boat pulls up. "Hey there! Need any help?" "No thanks! God will save me!" So the boat speeds off. After a grueling two hours treading water, a third boat pulls up. "You need some help?" "No thanks! God will save me!" So the third boat moves along. Hours pass. Too tired to tread water anymore, the Christian sinks and drowns. Standing at the gates to heaven, God shows up to let him in. "God! Why didn''t you save me?!" God just shakes his head, "I sent you three damn boats! What more do you want?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of ships can''t go in salt water? Snail-boats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Muslim refugees: just pretend to be Christian. That''s what most Christians do anyways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a white duck? A quacker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man gets pulled over for speeding... And he''s worried about what''s going to happen, as he''s close to losing his licence. The officer walks up and before he can say anything the guy says, ''Hey are you out here selling tickets again for the policemans ball?'' The officer respond ''Policemen don''t have balls''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife asks why I bring my ccw to church... Because you can never predict when there will be a mass shooting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar with his dog A man walks into a bar with his dog and orders two glasses of whiskey. He proposes a toast and both he and his dog empty their glasses. The girl behind the bar is surprised and asks: ''Can your dog perform other tricks?''. ''But of course'', the man answers, ''he can even gratify a woman''. Anxious to know more the girl leads the man and the dog into a little room above the bar. She undresses and full of expectation she lies down on the bed. The dog looks at her and does nothing, and the man then shouts to the dog, ''OK. Just ONE more time, let me show you how it''s done".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Horse walks into a bar... ..Barman: "Why the long face?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Swallow is a bird or a fish? It''s an order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anyone care for a limerick? There once was a man from Nantucket Who wanted to vacation in Phuket But changed his mind On where to unwind Because he''d rather not shit in a bucket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does NASCAR really stand for? Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and her twin were standing next to each other in the kitchen Well, long story short, I grabbed the wrong butt and my brother in law was not amused', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cleaning ladies: The new craze that''s sweeping the nation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the opposite of critical thinking? Critical theory.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Young Brunette Goes into the Doctor''s Office A young brunette goes into the doctor''s office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible" says the doctor, "show me". She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so it goes on. The doctor says, "You''re not really a brunette are you? You''re really a blonde". She says "Yes, doctor". "I thought so." the doctor says, then continues: "Your finger is broken".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Japanese man walks into a gun store... He asks the cashier, "Do you have any Rugers?" "Of course we do," says the cashier, and he dashes back into the stockroom. 5 minutes later he returns with one of each gun on Ruger''s entire product line. Rifles, shotguns, pistols, all brand-new, still coated in grease from the factory. "Which one would you like to try?" the cashier asks. The Japanese man looks over the row of 30 guns placed in front of him. After a moment, he turns back to the cashier and says, "None of them." "None?" the cashier asks incredulously. "Sir, this is every type of gun Ruger makes! Why would you ask to see the Rugers if you weren''t interested in any of them?" The Japanese man calmly replies, "Obviousry you''re not famiriar with antique German weaponry of the Weimar era. Very werru, I wirru rook for a Ruger somewhere eresu!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Obama wants to talk Michelle Obama into an open marriage Michelle: Barry, where is this coming from? This is very sudden! Our marriage has been very happy even under all the stress of this presidency. Obama: I''ve been in the closet about this for a while, but I have such a man crush for Diamond Joe. I want to have a relationship with him too. But don''t worry, I will love you. Michelle: This is very sudden. What would it even look like? Obama: Well, I don''t know. We would still spend a lot of time together. But we could also have dank threesomes. And smoke plenty of weed. Lots of salt about how this election played out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What part of your hand is the most salty? The NaCls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Its best to put your phone on some rice when its wet Asian people will come at night and fix it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard McDonalds is really bad for you. That why I only eat at Burger king.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an ill Saudi Arabian? Sikh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving with his wife and a small child when a cop pulls them over. A man is driving with his wife and a small child. A cop pulls them over and makes the man take a breathalyzer test. See, the cop says, you are drunk. The man protests that the breathalyzer must be broken and invites the cop to test his wife. She also registers as drunk. Exasperated, the man invites the cop to test his child. When the child registers drunk as well, the cop shrugs, says, Yes, perhaps it is broken, and sends them on their way. As they drive off, the man turns to his wife and says, See, I told you it wouldnt hurt to give the kid a couple of shots of vodka.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Communism jokes are not funny Unless everyone gets them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between your mom and a bowling ball? Your mom can''t fit in a bowling ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 cactuses are talking to each other One of them asks the other, "Hey, do you know how to speak the human language?" To which he responds, "yeah it''s easy, they always say ouch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a wine loving horse? Chardon-neigh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i don''t think women should stay in the kitchen... i mean, how are they supposed to clean the rest of the house from there?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Muslim enters the United States Oh sorry thought it was still 2016.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what the arch enemies of skinheads are? Blackheads.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All pro athletes are bilingual They speak English and profanity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Tigger doing in the toilet? Looking for Pooh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I returned from court to see ''Welcome home dad'' hanging over the foyer.. It was a suspended sentence', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muslims in the U.S.A [Removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a Chinese friend with really bad internet His name is Hai Ping', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow receive an award? It was outstanding in his field.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tip: if you don''t want comedians weighing in on politics.... ...don''t elect a joke. (Credit to Bo Burnham)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what do you all think of the new House of Cards? I have to say that whole plot twist with Trump becoming the new president was quite unexpected.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend overdosed on Tofu The coroner called it a Soysoning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Chicago Policemen does it take to crack an egg? None. It fell down the stairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to a $5 lady of the night... ... and he gets crabs. So the next day, he goes back to complain. And the woman says, "Hey, it was only $5. What did you expect, lobster?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tied a rope and swallowed it I shit you knot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Hispanic radio station? Mixed Signals', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If pronouncing your b''s like v''s makes you sound Russian... Then *soviet!*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get what you guys are saying about how Mexicans hate Trump... ... Every Mexican I see is calling him a peachy cool arrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My rich uncle just passed away so I recently came into some money But now the bills are all stuck together', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A English teacher says to a African student.. "okay you''re doing really good with your English, I would like you to use the word dandelion in a sentence" the student replies "ohh that is easy, The giraffe, is bigger, dan de lion"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate people who use the wrong words in a sentence and don''t correct themselves They sometimes should have the humidity to admit it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be up to date with memes... then I took an arrow to the knee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t you buy underwear from Ukraine? Because Chernobyl (cher-knob-el) fallout.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s always I before E Except when you run a feisty heist on a weird beige foreign neighbor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a man with a several rabbits on his head today... When I inquired as to why he had rabbits on his head, he simply stated "From a distance they look like hares"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do men sound like they''re having an orgasm when they''re lifting weights? And why is my father lifting weights in the bathroom?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('McDonalds is releasing a new Japanese fish sandwich. It will be called The Real Mc Koi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would cauliflower... ...but I don''t have its number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just found out I was dating a commie Guess I should''ve noticed the red flags earlier', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the sound of Trump''s head hitting the Liberty Bell? Dunnnnnnng', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Letter to a madman Inside a hospice, a madman approaches the others with a blank paper, examining it with attention. The other crazy people can not resist curiosity and ask: _ What is it? The crazy one with the letter, responds _ A letter from my brother Even for the other crazy people, that was too absurd. _ But the letter is blank. The madman responds serenely _ We do not talk anymore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('having sex for pleasure Apart from humans, the only creature that has sex for pleasure is the dolphin. I had to shag a lot of animals to find that out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Dee Snider say he wanted for Christmas? I WANNA ROCK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when a nail is driven through the canvas of a piece of artwork? A ''pain''-ting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do housewives do on Saturday nights? They go Sam''s Clubbing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college student is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog. He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He saves the girl''s life, but the pit bull is killed in the process. A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says: "You are a hero, tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers: "Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl". The man says: - "But I am not a New Yorker!" "Oh ,then it will say in newspapers in the morning: ''Brave American saves life of little girl''", the policeman answers. "But I am not an American!", says the man. "Oh, what are you then?" The man says: - "I am a Saudi !" The next day the newspapers says: "Islamic extremist kills innocent American dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband: "I have good news and bad news" Wife: "Tell me the bad news first." Husband: "The washing machine broke." Wife: "And the good news?" Husband: "The dogs are clean."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandmother died stoned. She was showing too much leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I work in construction... We don''t have side pieces, we have back hoes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to movies with her newborn son. The kid starts crying and keeps crying for 10-15 minutes. Frustrated, a man screams :" damnit woman, put a boob in the kid''s mouth. " Angered by the remark, the woman''s husband stands up and starts lecturing the guy in the dark about how he is a awful human being and doesn''t know how to behave with woman. The man screams again :" put one in his mouth too. "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. "Nurse,"'' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don''t know, Sir. I''m only here to wash your upper body and feet." He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?" Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other. She looks very closely and says, "There''s nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine." The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very closely: Are - my - test - results - back?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just enlisted my kids into the Navy. Or as the wife calls it, masturbated in the shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant prostitute visits her Doctor... The Doctor asks, "do you know who the father is?" The prostitute replies, "if you ate a can of beans, would you know which one made you fart?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what Mexicans think about Trump''s wall? Who cares, they''ll get over it..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just came to a conclusion Best wank of my life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a tight fitting bra? A boobie trap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mathematician walks into a pizza bar and orders one pi He receives two', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my Thanksgiving turkey like I like my own ass On the dining room table, with my family gathered round, and with my grandmum''s fists in it pulling out the stuffing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never trust a stairwell. Every time you turn around, it''s a new story!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is life? Better with drugs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Trump deports all the Mexicans Who''s going to build the wall?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks his father A boy asks his father: Where''s the potato peeler? Father: In the supermarket', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Conservatives keep telling me to find Jesus How am I supposed to find him if they want him sent back to mexico and want a wall to keep him out?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five year old granddaughter to me. Her: Knock, Knock. Me: Who''s there? Her: Interrupting cow. Me: Interrp.... Her MOO, MOO', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The 10 minutes joke One morning, a girl was taking a shower with her mom. She asked, "Mommy, Mommy, what are those?" The Mom says "Those are titties, dear." "When will I get those?" the girl asks. "When you''re older." the Mom says. The next morning, the girl is taking a shower with her dad. "Daddy, Daddy, what''s that?" she asks "That''s a penis, dear." he replies "When will I get that?" she asks "In ten minutes when your mom goes to work." [I remember hearing this in high school and had to share]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my wife thinks I''m really annoying... but we tried anal for the first time the other day so now I''m really a pain in her ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you never see a black person with Down Syndrome? God doesn''t punish anyone twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor and his wife were sun A doctor and his wife were sunbathing on a beach when a well-endowed, beautiful, young, blonde woman in a tight-fitting bikini strolled passed. The woman looked at the doctor, smiled seductively, and said in a very sexy voice, "Hi there handsome. How are you doing?" before wiggling her backside and walking off. "Who was that?" demanded the doctor''s wife. "Just a woman I met professionally," replied the doctor. "Oh yeah?" snarled his wife, "In whose profession? Yours or hers?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a small knife used for killing gorillas? A harambit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wouldn''t bother making a joke about an infinite line No point.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s cool how today everyone is applauding patriots for standing up for human rights... ...and by next Sunday everyone will be back to hating the Patriots again', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump the rarest form (real life incartination) of pepe? Because it can be witnessed only once in a *Melania*-um.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a female scientist? A scientits', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally got one over. The other day, Louise and I got into some petty argument. (I say it was petty. She would have said it was Armageddon.) As is our nature, neither of us would admit the possibility that we might be in error. To her credit, Louise finally said, ''Look. I''ll tell you what. I''ll admit I''m wrong if you admit I was right.'' ''Fine.'' I said. She took a deep breath, looked me in the eye and said, ''I''m wrong.'' I grinned and replied, ''You''re right.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mechanical Engineer NSFW Mechanical Engineer''s wife Delivers a baby.. Wife Sends SMS to her Husband: "Your New Vehicle is Launched." Husband replies back: "With Gear or Without Gear?*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Screamed on a drunk to get out of the road He replied, an Aeroplane just flew off over my head, What can a car make a difference ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long do owls live? Six and a half books.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of life''s greatest pleasures is watching your wedding video backwards... It starts off with lots of sex in a far flung exotic country. Then you move on to a massive party, surrounded by your family and your best friends, getting drunk and having a great time. Then you take off that ring, walk back down the aisle, leave the church, and go back to the pub with your friends after which an easy, stress-free, happy life awaits you. Bliss.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aztecs.... Are the religion of peace, you racist!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what they say about people with big feet... You could easily get a part-time job as a clown', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was offered sex with a 21 year old girl today.... In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner. Of course I declined, because I am a person with high moral standards and strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available with scented lemon or vanilla.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a basement full of progressives? A whine cellar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You were a still born baby.. Mother didn''t want you but you were still born.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blind dinosaur? A "Do-You-Think-He-Saw-urus" How do you call a blind dinosaur''s dog? Do-You-Think-He-Saw-urus Rex', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Muslim walks into the U.S Just kidding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I feel like I have nobody to talk to... I call the NSA. They''re really nice because they always listen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a pizza.....I have a pineapple UGH! Satan''s creation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My science teacher taught us about gravity today. It was such a heavy subject to take...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two snakes walk into a bar... ^^^Wait, ^^^they ^^^slide... ^^^Nevermind...XD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fastfood Clerk: Number 27! Double steak combo with extra fries! Man: Right here! Clerk: Here you go sir, sorry about your weight. Man: Oh, it wasn''t long at al- wait... Clerk: >:D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father and his 6-year-old...... A father and his 6-year-old son are walking down the street, and they come across two dogs having sex. The boy is shocked by what he sees and asks his father "Daddy, what are they doing?" The father, not wanting to lie to his son, says "they''re just making a puppy." "OK" says the son, and the father is relieved that he doesn''t probe further. The next day, the son bursts into his parents'' room and sees them having sex. The father jumps up and quickly covers himself. Knowing he''s in for an interesting talk, walks downstairs with him and they sit at the dining room table. His son asks him "Daddy, what were you and mommy doing?" Again, wanting to be honest with his son, he says "me and mommy were making a baby." His son pauses for a moment, thinking, and then replies "flip mommy over, I want a puppy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the skin on your elbow is called a weenus... Is the skin on your knee called a knee-nus? (I''m so sorry)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My teacher pointed at me with...... My teacher pointed at me with his ruler and said at the end of this ruler is and idiot! I got detention after I asked him which end he was referring to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest is giving a nun a ride home after mass one day... As they come to a stoplight the priest rests his hand on the nuns knee. The nun says "Father remember Luke 14:10", and the priest removes his hand from her knee. A little while later they come to a stop again and he places his hand on her thigh, she again says "Father remember Luke 14:10", he quickly removes his hand. He doesn''t try this again, after dropping her off he heads home and picks up his bible and flips to Luke 14:10 and it says, "Friend, move up to a better place"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a naked Asian? Barelee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Customer Service With A Smile ;) A Customer Service Clerk works for the local Grocery store. A woman who is visually upset, slams a 4 lb bag of flour on the table. Can I help you? As the clerk tries and get her to relax from a 13 to an 8. She yells at him: This flour is full of bugs! He calmly asks the woman: What are you a vegetarian?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These Stolen Valor guys all seem homeless or mentally ill... Guess they''re pretty good at impersonating our troops after all!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Asian Keanu An Asian Keanu enters a room. Asian Keanu got angry. Asian Keanu Reeves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Janet, a bit tipsy from the champagne, didn''t realize the new office photocopier was a 3D photocopier. So Steve got a nice bust for his bookshelf for christmas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am sad because I did something today. doing something stood on my not-to-do-list for today', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw my disrespectful co-worker today she was hot. "Wow, words can''t describe how pretty you are." I said walking up to her. She then replied looking at me as if I was a creep: "Uh thanks.. weirdo" "But numbers can" I smirked. "2/10. Bitch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1-step guide for Asexual Reproduction Go fuck yourself', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know a girl is into you? Just pinch yourself, if you don''t wake up, she doesn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said she''s had enough of me because I always get my directions mixed up. So I just packed my bags and right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife was choking at dinner, so I flipped her over the table, pulled her knickers down and stuck my tongue up her arse. The shock made her spit out the obstruction and breathe again. Thank god I knew the hind-lick manoeuvre!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Trump! What about the aliens from space? We need a ROOF!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People are counting down the time to the end of Trump''s presidency... Are you really that excited to have Kanye West as the president of US?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People like to compare Hillary Clinton to Hitler, but there''s one huge difference: Hitler acknowledged he was at fault for killing people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to tell the joke about the scarecrow... but I think it has already been posted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are they going to use to build the wall? The bricks that were shat by people when Trump became president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to the doctor The doctor said "im afraid your illness is terminal..." The man asked "well how long do i have doc?" The doctor said "10" The man asked "10 what?" The doctor said "9, 8, 7....."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ask /r/personalfinance to draw you a line, they deliver a circle. They always make ends meet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I go into a bar in scotland The bartender looks rather angry so I go up to him and ask what''s up He says ''you see that bridge over there'' pointing outside. I built that. But do they call me Angus the bridge builder. Nooo. ''You see this bar. I built it. Do they call me Angus the bar builder. No.'' ''But ye get caught with one goat..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FDR hates cripple humor He can''t stand it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t want to make a political joke It might get elected as president of the United States', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what if I don''t know what "apocalypse" means. It''s not like it''s the end of the world', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is caught staring so hard at his marriage certificate by his wife... She asks him what he''s looking for. He replies, "oh just the expiration date!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder... The bartender says "What a strange pet, what''s his name?" "Tiny." the man replies. "What an odd name, why do you call him tiny?" "Because he''s my newt."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know a Spanish philosopher and he lives in my kitchen... His name is Plato.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t Jews have showers in their homes? Because they''re too cheap to pay the bills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend''s a crappy computer ... she always shuts down when I need her but never shuts up when I don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the bread say before it jumped into the toaster? "I''M BREADY TO DIE"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted a cat but the wife wanted a dog ... so we compromised and got a dog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My blonde girlfriend and her Windows My girlfriend who happens to be blonde has still not upgraded her PC to Windows 10 but still continues to use version 7. When I ask her why, she just changes the subject. Finally I convince her to do the update, and then she calls me quite upset and says, "Honey, where the hell is the ''any'' key?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is sitting next to a woman on a jet that''s getting ready to take off. Suddenly, the man sneezes. He unzips his pants and wipes off the end of his penis with his handkerchief. He zips up and continues reading his magazine. The woman cannot believe what she just saw. Then he sneezes again, unzips, pulls out his penis and wipes it off with a handkerchief. The woman says, "Excuse me, sir, but that is disgusting and rude and if you do it again I am going to call the flight attendant and have you removed from this plane." He says, "I am so sorry, but I have this very rare, embarrassing physical handicap that causes me to have an orgasm every time I sneeze." The woman, disarmed by the man''s honesty and somewhat embarrassed by her own callousness, says, "Oh you poor man. Are you taking anything for it?" He answers, "Pepper."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breast Inplants They such a silly-con', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three types of people in this world. People who can count and people who can''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('China''s time zone is 28 days behind ours. "Chinese New Year"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my moose Big, brown, and horny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did you just stand there? An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church services when she was startled by an intruder. She caught him burglarizing her home of its valuables and she yelled: "Stop! Acts 2:38! Repent and be baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ, so that your sins may be forgiven." The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done. As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar, "Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture at you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boyfriend: You know you can..... Boyfriend: You know you can be a real bitch. Girlfriend: I have been called worse. Boyfriend: Like what? Girlfriend: Your girlfriend!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That''s a nice ham you have there It would be a shame if someone put an ''s'' at the start and an ''e'' at the end...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Intel, Google, Uber, eBay, McDonalds, Budweiser, AT&T, Oracle, Disney, Boeing, IBM and Apple have in common? Immigrants', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dicks are like LAYS potato chips... No one ever sucks JUST ONE!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas! This is what Santa Clause says when he sees your wife, mother and sister together in the same room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cannibal walked into a female patient''s surgery room... "I''ll take the eggs, please."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('50% of Canada Is the letter A', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have at last fulfilled my dream of becoming arms dealer... ... by selling 3D printed prosthetic limbs for the needy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man parks in a handicapped spot One day a man parks in a handicapped spot. An elderly woman woman drives up from behind, beeps the man and says "young man your not disabled, you should not be parking here". The man replies "did you just assume my gender". "Oh my mistake" says the woman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Doctor gives his patient the bad news that he only has a week to live... Patient - "No, I don''t accept that! I''d like an alternative fact please" Doctor - "Money-wise, you are now set for life"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I really like food Sorry, I made a Misteak, that wasn''t really a joke. It''s even Grater with Cheese. Damn. That was just Punishment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Red Riding Hood is skipping happily down the road when she sees the Big Bad Wolf crouched down behind a log. My what big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf! says Little Red Riding Hood. The wolf jumps up and runs away!!! Further down the road, Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again. This time, he is crouched behind a tree stump. My what big ears you have Mr. Wolf! Again, the wolf jumps up and runs away. About another two miles down the road, Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again, this time crouched down behind a road sign. My what big teeth you have Mr. Wolf! With that, the Big Bad Wolf jumps up and screams&Will you fuck off?! Im trying to take a shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s 2 + 2? A company was hiring, and had the selection down to a mathematician, an engineer, and a statistician. They called the mathematician in, and asked him what 2 + 2 was. He said, " well, in base 5 and up, it''s 4, but in lower bases, it could be 10 or 11 or 100. They called the engineer in and asked him what 2 + 2 was. He said, " theoretically, it''s 4, but it''s actually impossible to create a 2 inch rod and another 2 inch rod and place them end-to-end and get 4 because of measurement precision, temperature, etc." They called in the statistician and asked him what 2 + 2 was. He leaned in close, squinted his eyes and grinned a little, looked right and left, then said, "what do you want it to be?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Engineer smarts. An optomist, a pessimist, and an engineer were all shown a 24 ounce glass with 12 ounces of water in it. The optomist looked and said, "the glass is half full." The pessimist looked and said, "the glass is half empty." The engineer looked and said, "there''s twice as much glass as you need."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do the Welsh eat cheese? Caerphilly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My roommate asked to borrow my earbuds... Roommate: can I borrow your earbuds? Me: sorry, I don''t share. Roommate: why not? Me: ear diseases... Roommate: what are talking about?! Me: haven''t you ever heard of hearing AIDS?! Note: I apologize for nothing! Dad jokes for life!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently Abraham Lincoln kept extremely detailed records of every single tree he cut down, detailing the type of tree, dimensions, even the location where it was cut, and more. They''re called the Lincoln Logs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy dies and wakes up on a beach. Nice weather, hot girls playing beach volleyball, barbecues everywhere, laughter and joy. All of a sudden, Satan comes up to him. "Welcome to hell. Enjoy yourself, have a drink, have a hamburger and check out the area. If you need anything or have a question, feel free to ask me." he says. The guy walks along the beach, has a few drinks with a nice girl. He walks over a hill, when he sees a hole in the ground, full with tormented people, flames rising up from the hole. The guy runs towards the beach until he finds Satan. "Hey, I found this hole and all these people are being tormented... Whats that about?" "Oh," Satan says, "thats for the Christians, they want it that way."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the best part about sleeping with a midget? You''re sure to get a little head', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump, how do you plan on building the wall? 140 characters at a time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the roman cannibal feel about his victim? He was glad he ate her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things in the United States have been awfully unfortunate as of late It''s almost as if it were built upon a gigantic native american burial ground', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ''''I''m looking for the man who shot my paw.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you trigger a switch? Flip it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which bear can dissolve in water? A polar bear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dead battery? The car stood n the darkness of a deserted road. Directing the beam from his flashlight onto the automobile, a newly assigned policeman approached the car. When he came close enough to see inside the car, he found a guy and his girl silently stting in the front seat. Dead battery? he asked the boy. No, the boy replied, glaring at his girl companion,flat tire!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign outside at "Justice of the Peace" You furnish the bride...........we will do the rest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new season of House of Cards will be nothing compared to what lies ahead with President Trump!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a prostitute wear on her feet? Whore shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear you cant go to the theater in your old coat, can you? Husband: Dear you cant go to the theater in your old coat, can you? Wife (hopefully): Certainly not, dearest. Husband: Just what I thought so I only bought one ticket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the dog shaking? He had Barkinson''s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between gluten and hillbillies? One''s inbred, the others in bread', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('United States of America', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s been a shooting at a local bar... And the only survivor is a monkey. The police ask the monkey what the men over at bar itself were doing. The monkey mimes them drinking. The police then ask the monkey what the group over in the corner were doing. The monkey mimes the group playing poker. The police ask the monkey what the group in the other corner were doing. The monkey mimes them drinking and playing poker. Finally the police ask what the monkey was doing. The monkey mimes shooting up the entire bar with a machine gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give it to me, my girlfriend yelled. "I''m so fucking wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was talking to a fat girl about her weight... I was addressing the literal elephant in the room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Scottish highlanders does it take to change a light bulb? There can be only one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m surprised Trump ran as a Republican I thought he was running as a joke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife was abducted by a gang of mimes. They did unspeakable things to her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a donkey. I named it Heeh. It died. Heeh awwwww. :-(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I enjoy my women like I enjoy my coffee... Blindfolded and scared.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirate''s favorite type of joke? Traditionally a pun involving an "arrr", but for the purposes of this joke, it''s sarrrcasm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between New York City and the Land of Mordor? Two Towers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Soliciting a blowjob is illegal. Soliciting a blowjob is illegal, but betting a whore $50 she can''t swallow your cum isn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the 90''s Arsenal Soccer Club Had a player called David Dicks. When he was injured,the Newspaper wrote"Arsenal to play without Dicks". The coach was upset so the Newspaper changed the headline to read"Arsenal to play with Dicks out"... A record number of women attended the match', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sketchy neighborhood in Italy? A Spaghetto.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not a Grammar Nazi I''m alt-write', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like women like i like my pizza Crusty with lots of cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t like holocaust jokes. Anne Frankly you shouldn''t either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s an SS soldier''s favorite key? I don''t know, but I know it''s not C!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say when you''ve hit rock bottom, the only way is up... Well, I must have drilled a fucking hole in that rock because I keep falling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the Scottish started to colonize North America before the British... Could I say that the Scott Pilgrims landed at Plymouth Rock?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Trump''s reaction to the petition for him to release his tax returns Not my precedent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 moles were digging underground. They are in perfect line. Out of nowhere each gets a slightly different smell of the same source. "What is that delicious smell in front of us?" Asks the first mole. "I don''t know know, but it smells like cotton candy!" Replies the middle mole. "No, no! It has got to be butterscotch!" The first shouts. The first and middle look to the mole at the end of the line. "Who do you agree with?" The last mole stops. "I disagree with the both of you. It smells like molasses!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was told the general rules of life is to help people, be nice and give aids. So I don''t know why everybody is getting mad at me for infecting them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my steaks bloody and full of knives', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between jam and jelly I can''t jelly my dick in your mom''s ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my coffee Not tasting something gritty and hairy when slurping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re restoring Auschwitz to its past condition. My first question is how soon they will have it operating.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked upto my black cop friend and said "I always wanted to be a clack man, would you help me?" He said sure... and put my hands up where he can see them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike: I''m really glad I wasn''t born in France. Jim: Why? Mike: I can''t speak French.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A director, an accountant and and engineer go for a round of golf... By the time they get to the fourth, there''s a bunch of guys thrashing around blocking the course. The director calls over a groundsman and says "Who the hell are those bloody idiots up ahead?" "Ah yes sir, they''re from the local school for the blind." "You mean they''re actually blind?" Says the director incredulously. "Yes sir." "That''s bloody ridiculous, time is money and I have an urgent meeting this afternoon!" The accountant says "Well, in these tough finacial times, the Club probably needs all the revenue it can get." The engineer says "So why don''t they play at night?."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am 48 and my wife is 8 months pregnant. am i too old to be a dad?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Donald Trump convince Mike Pence to be his Vice President? He told him the job would be worth as much as a warm bucket of piss. Then, he showed him a video.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the shrimp share his food?? He was a little shellfish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between an anal thermometer and an oral thermometer? The taste', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 Christians are lost in the Arabian desert The first day is hot, and they''re miserable after running out of food and water. The night is surprisingly cold and even worse than the day. The second day and night are even worse. On the third morning, hotter than the past 2 days, they see a mosque. "We''re saved!" exclaims one. The other is wary and says he doesn''t think they''ll help Christians. The first says he doesn''t care, he''s so hungry he''d rather be killed than starve. The second one decides to tell them he''s Muslim. They arrive and the first man says he''s Christian and asks for help. The Muslims are very friendly and tell him they have plenty of food and water for him. The second one tells them he''s Muslim. The reply: "Salaam, brother! Happy Ramadan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you''ve been eating grass for the past ten minutes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are twins favorite fruits? Pears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The more you know, the more you don''t know. What constitutes terrorism', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mountain ranges aren''t funny They''re hill areas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the ocean said to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump: "Hows that Mexican mall going?" "Mall? We thought you said wall" Trump: "No way that''s harsh, also hows that Muslim band looking?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You think 7 years is bad luck for breaking a mirror??? Try breaking a condom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have Yogg-Saron as a psychiatrist.... I don''t think he''s good, whenever I walk in to his room, I feel like I''m getting more insane by the minute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Do Scottish people wear kilts? Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Freudian slip? It''s when you say one thing but fuck your mother', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend did some graffiti with me He just tagged along.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a kidnapping at my school He woke up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have big feet... It runs in the family', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Hitler prefer pajamas more than suits Cause they are more kampfy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to make a joke about sodium but then I thought Na.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Challenger anniversary* joke: What did Christa McAuliffe say to her husband before they left the house? You feed the cats, I''ll feed the fish. The "too soon?" Joke from 30 years ago.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the Harriet Tubman and the Red Hot Chili Peppers? Harriet Tubman was a heroine to the slaves; the Red Hot Chili Peppers are slaves to the heroin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do moths fly with their legs apart? Have you ever seen the size of moth balls?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, why couldn''t the doctors save grandpa''s life? Doesn''t matter son, he would have suffocated in the coffin"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young artist puts his first exhibit in an art gallery ... and a well known art critic is in attendance. The critic says to the young artist, "would you like my opinion on your work?" "Yes, " says the artist. "It''s worthless," says the critic The artist replies, "I know, but tell me anyway."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump''s family bought him a Gandalf the Grey costume for his birthday. Unfortunately, this wasn''t the sort of Grand Wizard outfit he had in mind...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump decided to make some music with his old clarinet... he called it "Alternative Rock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How about that train food? It''s off the rails', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who was the roundest knight at the Round Table? Sir Cumference', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not saying there is a direct correlation between Trump''s election... But the Chinese did say this would be the year of the Cock ages ago!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like my coffee. Without a penis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like Christmas gifts... They lose value after 25.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend finally asked me who I''ve had sex with in all of my life I held back nothing and told her about every one of them. My first, the girls in higschool, that one time with her friend back in college, until I got to her... I probably should''ve stopped there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn''t matter what you call him, he''s not coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a Taiwanese friend who is is incredibly rude and bossy He has a strong Taipei personality', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the next election and hindsight have in common? They both 2020', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sits at a bar crying The barkeeper asks him: "Why are you crying?" He answers:"My wife and I had an argue and she said she won''t talk to me again for a whole year." "That''s terrible", the barkeeper replied. The Man:"Worse, the year is over today!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I do things to children that they''re too young to understand... ...such as teaching them calculus and microbiology.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trumps hands are not that small Any hands would look small on such a massive cunt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man didn''t invent the wheel It invented itself after seeing Chuck Norris.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English speaker, a French speaker, a Spanish speaker, and a German speaker are in a park... ... when a man stands up on a table in front of them and asks if they can see him. They all nod and say: "Yes." "Oui." "Si." "Ja."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? One. We are efficient and don''t have humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks his father A boy asks his father, "Dad, what does a vagina look like?" The dad asks "Before or after sex, son?" The boy replies "Both." So the dad says "Before- it''s like a beautiful rose. Just amazing and beautiful, truly something to appreciate..." So the boy says "And after?" "Son, have you ever seen a pit bull after it''s gotten into a jar of mayonnaise?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two types of people in this world Those who can extrapolate information based off of the given context', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are jews best known for? Prophets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Muslim on a plane? Soon to be detained for flying home to his family in Houston after a business trip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('American wall A Mexican, American and Chinese are walking along the beach when they find a bottle, the Chinese man rubs it and out pops a genie, he grants of each guy one wish. The Mexican goes goes first and asks for a mansion in California sure enough his wish is granted. Then the American who is a red neck living in California, I''ve had enough of those Mexicans moving to California, I want you to build a wall around California to keep those Mexicans out, his wish is granted. Then the Chinese''s turn, he asks the genie how high is the wall? The genie says 150 feet, the Chinese knows Trump is visiting California, he says to the genie fill it with water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good thing I don''t see any political posts on my news feed In fact, my Myspace friends haven''t really posted much since 2010.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked santacraus for everything in the world found my sock inside out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump was stunned when he first laid eyes on Melania. Slowly he approached. He smiled and said "I must order this one" as he picked up the catalogue from the table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call money earmarked for use when the terrorist threat is high? Orange aid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was banned from the Middle East, so this is what I did... Iran', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a woman and a computer? You can actually punch information into a computer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('White House Update: Dick Cheney extends hunting invitation to Trump Nope. Sorry. Just kidding. Edit: buncha scrubs keep downvoting my hilarious joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Political opinions are like assholes If yours shows up in my Facebook feed I will probably block you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell male from female ants? Throw them in a bucket of water; if it floats, it''s buoyant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guys, the USA is looking pretty bad... I think its time for USB.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An invisible man and an invisible woman got married. Their kids were nothing to look at either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Classic Why don''t blind people like to go skydiving? Because it scares the dogs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know it''s spring in Israel? There''s a Rosenbloom on every block!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s been a week since my wife went missing. The police told me to expect the worst. So I took her things back out of the garbage bin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you tell your wife if she has two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are pharmaceutical chemists considered such studs? They''re able to make a fun-gal cream.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the compulsive gambler with diarrhea? Well, he lost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Harry Potter''s philosophy on relationships... Hit it and quidditch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter how popular they get.. ... antibiotics are never going viral.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s favorite California city? Banning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called when a black person wears whiteface? Going incognegro.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of meat does a priest eat on Friday? Nun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a job assisting a fledgling orchestra with their day to day activities and helping to organize upcoming shows... My official title is Band Aide. (I thought of this in the shower, so it''s definitely not funny)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey gurl, you banned from America yet? Cause dat'' ass is out of this world... and therefore unamerican and cannot be trusted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife wanted me to whisper dirty things in her ear... So I leaned forward and said: "dishes, bathroom and laundry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love, I''m pregnant, what would you like it to be? A joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attention! My cousin has 2 tickets for the 2017 SUPER BOWL, both box seats. He paid $ 2,000 for both tickets, but he didn''t realize last year when he bought them, it was going to be the same day of his wedding. If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place...It''s at United Methodist Church @ 3pm. Her name is Charlene, she is 5''6 about 140lbs, good cook too...She''ll be the one in the white dress!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Republicans have to say about the latest edition of Democratic nonsense ? Nothing... They were busy at work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate... And I can picture us invading that world because they''d never see it coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do gay people eat for breakfast? An all you can eat pufft', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love being excluded from things Should have got a green card', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My SO gives great handjobs And I''m not saying that because I''m a narcissist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to submit a patent for a gold-plated butt plug, but Steve Jobs beat me to it. It turns out, he was already making overpriced toys for assholes [Obligatory edit: top submitted post is about butt plugs. Wowza! Also, thank you, kind Redditor for the gold! I can''t believe a gilded joke is about sex toys :)]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a fruit and a nut? I don''t fruit all over your mother''s tits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told this girl to text me when she got home ... I think she''s homeless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the collision between the cement truck and the septic pump truck? There was some pretty hard shit in the road.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s been revealed that President Donald Trump has "Batmophobia", otherwise known as a "chronic fear slopes" Now I understand why he was keen to dodge the draft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There I was, eating cornflakes and milk out of the bowl... when my dad came in, shook his head and pulled the handle to flush them away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John Hurt? Nope, John Dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought I''d only need to make one more joke about 2016 not being over But this one really Hurt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like first aid classes its the only time I get to be touched by a caring human.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arkansas Redneck Sex Two rednecks are chugging beers in a Little Rock bar. One sheepishly asks the other, "So, do you ever cry when you have sex with a new woman?" The other says, "All the time. It''s the pepper spray".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rob thank God you picked up! Hey remember when you said if a needed a place to crash i cou- hold on ****to copilot**** STOP CRYING ROB WILL HELP!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know that I have an attitude problem But I just don''t care', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Jesus play hockey? He keeps getting NAILED TO THE BOARDS!...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Scientology and Donald Trump? Scientology has better celebrities.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LeBron James laughs at all the countries banning people from entering Because he has traveling immunity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like boners Ignore them and they will go away. Beat them and they too will get away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that the first condoms were made of fish intestines. So people had the guts to do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between people who voted for Trump, and those that didn''t? On average, about $30,000 in student debt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my golf score Mid-eighties and with slight handicap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know those slices of American cheese you get from the supermarket? You''re not going to be able to buy those anymore. Since Trump is going to make America grate again, apparently.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A CEO goes to heaven... A CEO passes away and goes to heaven. There''s a line to get in, but he''s not used to waiting in lines and figures this must be a line for all those other people. He bustles on up to the head of the line, but St. Peter sees him and stops him. "Hey, what do you think you''re doing?" "Well, I am - was - CEO of ..." "That doesn''t make any difference up here, we''re all equal. Go to the back of the line, unless you have somewhere else to go..." So he goes to the back of the line, trying to assimilate his newfound status of ''equal'', when he sees a man go past him. The man is in a white coat and has a stethoscope around his neck. He bypasses everyone and goes on in. The former CEO is incensed. He marches up to the front of the line and confronts St. Peter. "How come that doctor got to go in ahead of everyone, if we''re all equal here?" "Oh, that was God. He just thinks he''s a doctor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something happened at a friend''s work A relative of mine works at a toy distribution center. They specialize in talking dolls. They recently received a Muslim one, but nobody knows what it says because they''re all afraid to pull the cord.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The good news First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A toast! Had to throw away my toaster because it kept burning my toast. I guess you could say I''m black toast intolerant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t believe that Trump is banning Muslims from the U.S. Like, Syria-sly America?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of America''s Longest Running Gags... Trickle-down Economics', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never trust stairs, They''re always up to something.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it awful to be an egg? You only get laid once, it takes three minutes to get hard, and you come in a box with eleven others.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s long and hard and is full of seamen? Naval college', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The demolition workers performed at the workers event last night. Heard they brought down the house with their act.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the alt-right call day? Alt-night', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whenever one door closes, another opens. "Wow, you must be very optimistic about life." "No, I live in a haunted house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friends are baffled that I gave up the single life for my European wife and wonder why I don''t chase girls anymore. It''s because she keeps me in Czech.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s harder than rocket science? My dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Australian walks into a US bar... ...with a crocodile under his arm. The bartender takes one look and says, "Hey! You can''t bring that dangerous animal in here!" "Dangerous? That ridiculous!" the Aussie proclaims. "Watch this!" He places the croc on a table and grabs a nearby newspaper, rolling it up. He hits the croc over the head. The croc''s jaws slowly open. The Australian whips out his dick, lays it over the crocodile''s teeth, and hits it on the head again. The croc closes it''s mouth ever-so-gently, not breaking his skin. "Anyone else wanna try it?" the Australian asks. A blonde woman raises her hand and says, "I will...if you don''t hit me with the paper."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks for?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move." "Oh", said the man. "Whose clock is that?" "That''s Mother Teresa''s", replied St. Peter. "The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie." "Incredible", said the man. "And whose clock is that one?" St. Peter responded, "That''s Abraham Lincoln''s clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life." "Where''s Donald Trump''s clock?" asked the man. St. Peter pointed upwards and said, "Right there, we''re using it as a ceiling fan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a tree with no leaves? Bark Naked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Christa McAuliffe say to her husband right before she got on the Challenger Shuttle? Honey you feed the dog I''ll feed the fish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cats and Dogs Did you know cats are smarter than dogs? Dogs can''t take x-rays, but cats can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Pervert, A Con Artist and a Fascist walk into a bar... ..The Bartender Says, "What''ll it be Mr. President Trump?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Puns plz Someone throw shit out there for me to make puns with. A topic, or whatever, and I''ll do my best. Anyone else can join in too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named ''Amal. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named ''Amal.'' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan''. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, ''''But they are twins. If you''ve seen Juan, you''ve seen Amal.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of people in this world... The ones who understand binary, and the ones who get laid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you want to celebrate!? It''s the year of the cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Irish gangster that all living systems strive for? (X /r/ScienceJokes) Homie O''Stasis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a secret society of beef trying to take over the world? The Meat Cabal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two penguins are driving in a car ... The driver says: "hey could you change the radio station?" And the other one says: "No radio?" "Four wheels!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Trump got elected... The Mexicans hispanicked and freaked out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock... Who''s there? "Good afternoon sir! If we could jus have a moment of your time, we''d like to talk to you about the church of Scientology"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A giraffe is at the airport going through the TSA line ... And the security agent says: "hey, is the your laptop?" And the giraffe says: "I thought you''d never ask"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is the saltiest fish? Tuna', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the local buy and sell to see if there were any cool old jack in the boxes. But nothing jumped out at me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American bloke goes on holiday to England. On his return, he''s telling his pal all about it. "I was coming out of a shop one day and it was raining hard outside, so I took shelter in a doorway. Another feller was sheltering too, and he turned to me and he said, "Nice weather". Well, of course it wasn''t nice weather at all. In fact it was terrible weather...and then I got it! This was an example of the famous British irony! I loved it! And I''ve been using irony ever since. Like the other day, I was having this barbecue for the family and a bunch of neighbours, and I burned the burgers. And Joe, from next door, was standing there and I turned to him and looked at the burgers and said, "Nice weather"." - from "Nobody reads long copy anymore. Here''s why."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you put on Mongolian Beef? Tatar Sauce.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell if a girl is ticklish? You give her two test tickles I will see myself out. Thank you and have a good day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is that a booger in your nose? No, it''s snot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was playing some dubstep and when the beat dropped... My deaf friend said to turn the volume down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that 1/100 people have undiagnosed dyslexia Whoops, wrong bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Former presidential candidate Senator Sanders falls ill. What do you call him? A sick Bern.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard this really funny joke about procastination I''ll post it later', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, ''Kin ya swallar?'' The woman shakes her head no. Then he asks, ''Kin ya breathe?'' The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no. The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table. His partner says, ''Ya know, I''d heerd of that there ''Hind Lick Maneuver'' but I ain''t niver seed nobody do it!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father has three sons. One is an accountant, one is an engineer and the other is a lawyer... The father asks each of his three sons the same question, "what does two plus two equal?" The accountant son answers, "four point zero zero." The engineer son answers "somewhere between 3.9999 and 4.0001." Finally, the father asks his son the lawyer "what does two plus two equal?". The lawyer pulls his father into the other room and closes the door. He then closes the blinds and motions for his father to come into the corner. He whispers, "what do you want it to equal?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had an Germany born English teacher in high school. If you know what I mean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandfather died in a concentration camp It was terrible, he got drunk one night and fell off a guard tower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A relative of mine works at a toy distribution center. They specialize in talking dolls. They recently received a Muslim one, but nobody knows what it says because they''re all afraid to pull the cord.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does clickbait work? Just grab this electrical cable. Then what happens? WHAT HAPPENS NEXT WILL SHOCK YOU!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If people had to pay rolling pins, They''d be rollin'' in the dough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes crop circles? A protractor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if someone''s a pilot? because they''ll fucking tell you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the unicycle win the race? Because the bicycle was two tired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like my computer. On my lap. Turned on. Virus free.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an aging actor who has finally paid off his house? Mortgage freeman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my Welsh mate how many sexual partners he''s had. He started counting and fell asleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A plateau is the highest form of flattery. That''s it...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at the cemetery this morning... I was at the cemetery this morning to visit my grandparents grave when I noticed that there were 4 guys carrying a coffin up and down between the graves. When I was leaving I noticed that the 4 guys were still carrying the coffin up and down between the graves. As I sat in my car, about to drive away, I couldn''t help but think, "those guys have lost the plot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Personally I think Trumps a Genius, How do you beat China? Hit them hard by one upping them with a Wall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend said he didn''t mind homosexuality, just didn''t like it in his bedroom. I asked, "have you tried the kitchen?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you combine north beach and south beach? Sum of beaches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy goes to his parents to tell them something "Mom, Dad. I''m gay." His father then turns to him and says "Hi Gay, I''m 100 Dollars Richer!", while recieving money from the mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tour guide stabs a customer to a bloody mess. She wanted to be tored.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My nervous system is so narcissistic. It only thinks about itself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Snowman pull his pants down? Because the snowblower was coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife says to her Accountant husband Wife: what is inflation? Husband: Earlier you were 36-24-36. But now you are 48-40-48. Though you have everything bigger than before, your value has become less than before. This is INFLATION', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Jewish elbow. A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I''m on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell." "Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow? "What...you coming empty handed?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fart Football An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, ''Seven Points.'' His wife rolls over and says, ''What in the world was that?'' The old man replied, ''its fart football.'' A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says, ''Touchdown, tie score...'' After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, ''Aha. I''m ahead 14 to 7.'' Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, ''Touchdown, tie score.'' Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, ''Field goal, I lead 17 to 14.'' Now the pressure is on for the old man. He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard. Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he''s got, and accidentally poops in the bed. The wife says, ''What the hell was that?'' The old man says, ''Half time, switch sides', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A king wants his daughter to have..... A king wants his daughter to have a husband so he puts up a flier. The first guy comes and the king puts green glitter on his daughters private part. The next morning the king checks the guys private part and there''s green glitter all over it. More and more guys come along and the same thing keeps happening. Finally, one day this guy comes along. The king puts the green glitter on his daughters private part, and the next morning checks the guys privates and there was no green glitter. The king is thrilled and offers the man his daughters hand in marriage. The guy smiles to accept with a mouth full of green glitter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jessica was feeling ill for a few days before going to the doctor... The doctor walks into the room and asks Jessica how old she is and what the issue is. She tells the doc that she''s 12 years old and she''s been having pain in her lower abdomen. The doctor tells Jessica that she must be starting puberty and asks if she''s been doing anything different than normal. Jessica gets a little embarrassed and tells him, "I''ve been putting Jolly Ranchers in my pussy." The doctor is shocked and asks her why she''s been doing this. Jessica replies, "Well, when I was getting food at the local diner, I heard all the guys talking about how many jolly ranchers have been in my mom''s pussy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife just left me because I spent our life savings on a penis enlargement... She couldn''t take it any longer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer I''m not sure what he laced them with, but I''ve tripping all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear Donald Trump wants every welfare recipient to take a drug test... I don''t even what to know what he''s planning to do with all those urine samples.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two men on the opposite sides of the world, One is on a tightrope walking between two buildings 90 stories high. The other is getting a blowjob from a 90 year old woman. They both have exactly the same thought..........Don''t look down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love everything about Motorbikes But sometimes they just make me two-tyred.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a gay horse eat? heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was visiting my daughter last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper. "This is the 21st century," she said. "We don''t waste money on newspapers. Here, use my iPad.". I can tell you this... That fly never knew what hit him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Knock Knock Who''s there? Europe Europe who? No you''re a poo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Nixon have a reputation for not being punctual? He is, after all, the late Richard Nixon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a projectile that is very good at finding friends? A homie missile.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently my coworker has lived a very sheltered life. He comes up to me while I''m eating lunch and asks "Say, what is that you''re eating out of??" "What, my thermos?" "Yeah! How does that work?" "Uhh, it keeps the hot stuff hot and the cold stuff cold." "Wow! I oughta get me one of those!" And he just walks away. I didn''t give it much thought until he shows up to my desk today, fuming mad "It didn''t work like you said it would!" He shoves his open thermos in my face and inside is some weird, multicolored shit with two wooden sticks floating on top. I ask "Ugh! What the hell did you put in it!?" "Two popsicles and chicken noodle soup, why!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has 99 legs and one tooth? The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Harry Potter better than Jews? He made it out of the chamber.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people say Pokemon is for little kids. It isnt and if you bully me I''m telling my mommy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People compare Trump and hitler all the time, but there is one major difference. Hitler was good at making speeches', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are there any prostitutes you can hire just to talk to you??? Apparently they are called therapist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a knight that jousts all the time Sir Lancelot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did jesus say to his dad.. Who died and made you god?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the sous chef set a baby on fire? Flambby', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t like rape jokes. They''re always so forced.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some mornings I wake up bitchy... Other mornings I let her sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I burnt my Hawaiian pizza today. I should have cooked it at Aloha temperature.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sick eagle that just flew in from out of the country? an ill-eagle immigrant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a neo-nazi plays jazz, what time signature do they use? 14/88.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: Dad, I''m hungry Son: Dad, I''m hungry Dad: Okay, I''ll go to the store It has been 12 years. He still hasn''t come back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know there''s a French man who was named after a saint, and is now widely known for dabbing and whipping so hard, he actually ends up breaking his arms? His name is Pre Fouethard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NY Times said Gen Xers spend the most amount of time on the internet. Data were collected by survey monkey, analyzed by baby boomers and written up by the millennial intern.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My daughter wanted a Disney Princess birthday party& &so I made all her friends come over and clean my house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said she''d leave me if I spend any more time on the internet. Bet closed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It doesnt matter how popular apple is... everyone has Windows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a vegetarian that eats seafood? An omnivore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Aisha a world renowned penetration tester? Because muhammad taught her from a very young age.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cheating I was devastated to find out my wife was having an affair, but, by turning to religion, I was soon able to come to terms with the whole thing. I converted to Islam, and we''re stoning her in the morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a nun pregnant? You dress her up as an altar boy..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Job interview A guy goes to a job interview and the interviewer asks " how is your maths skills". The guy replies " oh, im real fast at maths". The interviewer is curious and decides to test him with some quick-fire questions. " Interviewer: ok then. 95? The guy quickly responds 50 Interviewer: 102 The guy immediately answers back again "32" The interviewer is puzzled and says "those answers were both wrong. youre absolutely terrible at math" To which the guy responds "yeah, but im fast at it"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guitar teacher joke One of my guitar students wants me to teach him Wonderwall, I said maybe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many noses did the guy with the best sense of smell have? Two noses? No, one nose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Marie le Pen''s favourite nuts? Catchjews', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finding a job is difficult... I started at the orange juice factory but couldn''t concentrate, Being a tailor just didn''t suit me, I couldn''t cut it as a barber, I didn''t have the foundations to be an architect, I just didn''t have enough patients to be a doctor, I felt soleless in the shoe factory, I couldn''t hack it as a lumberjack, I couldn''t keep my eye on the job as an optician, Being an electrician was shocking, Sewage maintenance was just draining, I just wasn''t taking off as a pilot, My spell as a wizard didn''t work, Working at a coffee shop was too much of a grind, I didn''t make the grade as a teacher, I didn''t have the thyme to be a chef, My career as a comedian was a joke, I couldn''t see a future being a historian, And now I''m an archaeologist and my future lies in ruins!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best thing about having an STD... you get to share it with people who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally found an onramp for the road to success!!!! It was closed for construction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A German and a Swiss are arguing about who''s country is better... The German, clearly annoyed, asks the Swiss "So what''s so great about Switzerland?" The Swiss shrugs, simply saying. "Well, the flag is a big plus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 69-ing in China? Tu Can Chu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Forest Gump decides to run for President of USA and is getting interviewed about it. Interviewer: "We were all surprised that you decided to run for President Mr Gump, what made you do that"? Gump: "My personal experiences really compel me to do it." I: "What type of promises will you make to the voters?" Gump: "Well first of all I''d make running the national sport, fishing the national past time, Curious George the national book, ping pong taught in all classes and no more war." I:"Thats interesting as that can be viewed as something very anti-American especially how American''s love war. Tell me something, how can you defeat Trump?" Gump: " I have a higher IQ then him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Went to the Indian bakery today and asked for some bread They said they had naan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Donald Trump take anti-anxiety pills? To prevent Hispanic attacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fear of deadly snakes? Common sense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the perfect name for an Indian butler? Mahatma Coat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s least favorite ''80s band? Foreigner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Batman''s least favorite videogame? Injustice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('..Trump said "Buy american, Hire american" Standing on an Ikea podium from *Sweden*, behind bullet proof by Saint Gobain Glass from *France*, smiling at a 4K Sony *Japanese* Video camera, speaking into a Dolby Sennheiser *German* microphone, with vigorous hand gestures giving a glimpse of a Rolex under the cuff made in *Switzerland* he patriotically said ..*"Buy American, Hire American, Stop Immigrants".* while standing beside a *Slovenian wife*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband: "Babe, I just won the lottery! Pack a bag!" Wife: "Oh my goodness -- This is amazing! Where are we going?! What do I pack?!" Husand: "I don''t care. Just pack and get the fuck out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trying to think of a new password WINDOWS: Please enter your new password. USER: cabbage WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters. USER: boiled cabbage WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character. USER: 1 boiled cabbage WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces. USER: 50fuckingboiledcabbages WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character. USER: 50FUCKINGboiledcabbages WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively. USER: 50FuckingBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon''tGiveMeAccessNow! WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation. USER: ReallyPissedOff50FuckingBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDontGiveMeAccessNow WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was so embarrassed when I got an erection during a prostate exam. Especially when they found out I''m not even a doctor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexico should be happy about Trump building the Wall... The GDR payed 400 Million Mark to get their "wall against facism".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you wake Lady Gaga? Pokerface', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexicans are shocked about Trump''s wall But they''ll get over it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard of the Ancient Greek hero Bophades? He was a lot like Achilles, he had just one weakness. Except instead of his heel it was his groin. You may have heard of "Achilles heel", but have you heard of "Bophades'' nuts"?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cops contacts with homicide via radio: - Send in a team ... - What is situation? - The murder, the victim is a man, 38 years old, his mother struck him with a knife several times for entering on the wet, just cleaned floor. - Did you arrest her? - No, the floor still wet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People always tell me not to piss in the shower... ...but you know, it''s difficult not to when you''re taking a shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Italians enter the bus in New York... Two Italians enter the bus in New York and start very noisy conversation: " .... ''em come first, then I come, two asses together, I come again, two asses together, then I pee, pee again and I come in the end... " An old lady nereby can''t stand it any longer and says: " You pigs, what a shame to discuss your disgusting sexual life on public!!!! " Italian: " Hey, wassup lady??? I just tella my friend, how to spella Mississippi....."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend left a note on the fridge "This is not working I''m going to my mum''s house." So, I opened the fridge''s door, the light came on and the juice was cold. - What the hell did she mean?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three words to ruin a man''s ego. "Is it in?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rick Astley told me that you could borrow any of his Disney movies, except Up He''s never gonna give you Up...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do fake news sites and porn subreddits have in common? No source.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was having a piss in a war zone. Probably wasn''t the best time for one of my fellow soldiers to yell, "Cover me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I said to her: "Two more inches and I''d be a king" "Two inches less and you''d be a queen", she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Rabbi and the Mexican say to each other at the Trump rally? Jew! Es!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the IRS audit IRS: According to your tax return you claim got money for nothin'' & checks for free. Taxpayer: Am I in trouble for that? IRS: We''d say you''re in dire straits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 5 people sitting In two rows? Tetris', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Work At Sears And Some Black Guys Came In Asking For Polyester Pants It''s weird because they usually pick cotton.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mechanical engineers wife comes out of delivery. She texts him She texts him : "your new vehicle has been launched". He replies : " is it with gear stick or automatic?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I brought a pet iguana home from the pet store... I think there''s something wrong with him because he''s very lethargic and I can''t get him up. It must be a reptile dysfunction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is grey and comes in pints? An elephant!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sumo wrestlers have to make sure their legs are always shaven So people don''t confuse them with feminists', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two types of people in this world, Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a foot long, made of leather and sounds like a sneeze? A shoe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does this joke have in common with Madeline McCann? They both never get old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('RIP Boiling water You''ll be mist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the Boar say to the Pig? "I''m a furry"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[True story] I asked a filipino for the time.. He replied: "It''s por pipty pive"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find arrows? At a Target', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a kitten who accidentally eat all your pills? A Caterpillar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Bollywood version of the Dr Jekyll story is more childish. Hyde and Sikh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally poked my girlfriend in the eye while she was sleeping. She didn''t even see it cumming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than roses on your piano? Tulips on your organ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found the city in which cheese was first produced! It''s from Age!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump doesn''t want to have sex with his daughter He just has "alternative family values"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone seems to think that Trump''s new wall is offensive... but I just think it''s more wallish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always give 110% Which is why my cum is considered the creamiest substance known to man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What language does a dozen speak? Twelveish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sits down at a bar And looks around for the bartender to order a drink. He sees nobody but hears a small voice that says, "That''s an awfully nice shirt you''re wearing." Confused, the man looks around and sees only a bowl of peanuts on the bar. Needing a smoke, the man walks over to the cigarette machine. As he gets closer, he hears a different voice, this time insulting his shoes. The man, now utterly confused, turns around and walks back to the bar. The bartender walks out from the kitchen and apologizes for not hearing him come in and let''s him know the peanuts are complimentary but the cigarette machine is out of order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stalin''s political career didn''t really take off, until he played the trump card -Seize the means of reproduction!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, there''s these two sisters A blonde girl asks her older blonde sister. "How do you give a blow job?" Her sister smiles and says. "Next time you have to take a shower, take a bath instead. Look real close, when you see yourself, put your mouth to the water and start blowing real hard, it''s not slutty if it''s yourself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man dies and goes to heaven In heaven, he sees a wall of very large clocks. He asks the Angel "What are all these clocks for?" Angel answers "These are lie clocks, every person has one lie clock. Whenever you lie on earth, the clock ticks once." The man points towards a clock and asks, "Who''s clock does this belong to?" Angel answers ''This clock belongs to Mother Teresa. It has never moved, so she has never told a lie." then the man asks "Where is Hillary Clintons clock?" The Angel replies "That one is in our office, we use it as a table fan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man and a genie He''s granted three wishes, genie tells him to go in the hotel on the beach where all his wishes will be granted, he steps in the main floor and finds himself knee deep in hundred dollar bills, he smiles as he starts up the stairs where he finds the entire floor filled with beautiful women wanting to satisfy his every desire, as he heads up the stairs to the third floor to find his third wish he is suddenly grabbed by several men and thrown out the window with a noose around his neck where he slowly strangulates. The genie sitting on the beach sipping a drink looks over and smiles as he recalls that many men wish to wade knee deep in money and many more wish to be lavished upon by many beautiful woman but once again he is perplexed as to why any man would ever wish to be hung like a nigger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One mans trash is another mans treasure Is a good quote... But apparently its not the best way to tell your kid he''s adopted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is always a blessing to have more bishops it makes the church more accessible to children *ahem* people', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a dyslexic,agnostic and insomniac spend most of his time doing? Staying up all night thinking if there really is a dog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy enters a haircutters... ...and the barber whispers to his customer, This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you. The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, Which do you want, son? The boy takes the quarters and leaves. What did I tell you? said the barber. That kid never learns! Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill? The boy licked his cone and replied, Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Poor Russians A Russian woman walked into an empty Moscow shop. "I see you have no vegetables today" "No," said the shopkeeper, "this is a butcher shop. It''s meat we haven''t got. The shop with no vegetables is further down the street."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than 8 babies in 1 dustbin?.. 1 baby in 8 dustbins', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Eric Clapton and Donald Trump have in common? They were both jealous of the size of a black man''s crowd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has six eyes, four wings and eight legs? Two chickens and a goat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Dougherty would smash all the dishes I used to know a family named Dougherty. Every time they were going traveling, they would calmly go through the kitchen and smash all the plates, cups and bowls, then cheerily sweep up the mess. I asked them why they did this, and Mr. Dougherty said "I don''t want to come home to a house full of Dougherty dishes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket... Suddenly she realises that some asshole has her pen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many babies would it take to paint your house red? Well, that depends on how hard you throw them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know, those people who insult Obama and the Clintons.. really need to stop beating around the Bush.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Came First... The chicken Or the furry?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God made each and every one of us until he got to China. Copy paste...copy paste...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bikes Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a gay dinosaur called? Nsfw Megasorass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pilot say to the Vietnamese mechanic underneath the plane? " "You are the Nguyen beneath my wings"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cold lesbian? A klondyke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbours listen to good music Whether they want to or not', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can a woman make you a millionaire? When you marry her as a billionaire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Playing guitar at parties Playing guitar at parties is all good and fun until someone tries to finger A minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton is not a rapist. He just likes to "feel your pain".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is a reposted joke like a novice chef''s pot roast? It''s way overdone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One good thing about graduation is that you get to wear a funny hat that makes your brain look larger than it actually is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know you can break your nose if you squint hard enough? I did it on the bus today and some Asian guy punched me in the face!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do I do when the Tiger breaks out of its enclosure and bites me? ISUZU', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I loved John Hurt so much... that I''m not even going to make the joke that my heart John Hurts right now. Even though it would make me feel better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a joke''s favorite kind of music? *pun*k rock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did it hurt? "Did what hurt?" "When you fell from heaven and landed on an ugly tree and hit every branch?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So God and the Devil are sitting next to each other on a bench. The Devil reaches over and strangles God, pointing out humanity as proof of God''s fallibility.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call nudes from the 90s hot mail', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom I forgot. Am I special or unique? No son. You''re retarded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the bread during the sacrament represents Jesus'' body... ...why don''t we nail the bread to the table?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when a ghost takes a crap? Rectoplasm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man calls a doctor Man to Doctor : Help, my friend has fallen dead! Doctor: First of all, make sure he''s really dead *sound of a gunshot* Man: Ok, what do I do now?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris threw an impact grenade and killed one hundred people. Then the grenade blew up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if your girlfriend is choking ? Back up a few inches', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two gay judges? They tried each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do terrorists in Antarctica love being interrogated? Snow boarding is fun as hell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little black boy is in the kitchen helping his mom She accidently knocks the flour over and covers the little boy. He says to his mom " look mom I''m white!" She smacks him and busts his lip, then she tells him to go tell his father what he said. The little boy goes to his father and says " look dad I''m white!" he hits him so hard he falls to the ground. The father tells him to go tell his grandma what he just said. The little boy goes to his grandma and says "look nana I''m white" she hits him so hard he passes out. When the little boy finally comes to he says " I''ve only been white for 10 minutes and I already hate all you niggers!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been single for a while now and I''m staring to realize something. They blur out A lot of Asian porn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2016 had many celebrity deaths.. ..but 2017 will Hurt the most. :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('South Park / Secret life of Pets mashup One dog said to another come here and watch these sticks. The other dog came and looked for the sticks but didnt see the sticks anywhere so he asked where these sticks were located. Their eyes met and the first dog said: did you think i meant these sticks? I meant these fick sticks"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a psychologist and a dentist? One treats mental disorders... and the other treats dental mis-orders.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy has a massive crush on a girl A guy has a massive crush on this girl. He is so enchanted by her that every time he see''s her he gets an instant boner. In order to avoid any embarassment from an obvious boner he decides to call the girl and ask her out over the phone. To his surprise she agrees almost instantly and they make plans. As soon as he hangs up he thinks, "shit, what am I gonna do, I''ll get a boner as soon as I see her and she''ll never talk to me again." So like a man, he finds the perfect solution to him problem. He duct tapes and ties his dick to his leg. On date night, he goes to her door, double checks his work with a patt on his leg, check. He rings her doorbell, she opens the door, and he kicks her in the face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make seven even? Take the s off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The guilty gasser... This happened to me tonight: I was in a restaurant bathroom and a guy let out a pretty normal fart, which he immediately followed up by saying "sorry guys..." I was telling my wife about how weird it was that someone felt the need to apologize for a normal bathroom function. Without missing a beat, she asked: "...did he sound deflated?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is my period story Period. End of story.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? "Firetruck" ...What were you thinking? What starts with "P" and ends with "ORN"? "Popcorn" ..What were you thinking?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when two well endowed astrophysicists have a gay sword fight? A Large Hardon Collider.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A penguin has car trouble.. A penguin is driving along the highway when, suddenly his engine starts running rough and he sees smoke in his rear view mirror. He pulls off the highway and finds the nearest service station, and pulls up to the garage with the car shaking and sputtering. He tells the mechanic what happened, and the mechanic says "OK, give me 10 minutes to check it out." Meanwhile, the penguin sees an ice cream shop across the street. Thinking this is a perfect time for a tasty treat, he heads over and gets himself an ice cream cone. After he finishes, he walks back over to the garage, and asks the mechanic "So, did you find out what''s wrong?" The mechanic looks at the penguin and says "It looks like you blew a seal." The penguin quickly wipes his face and says "Oh, no, that''s just the ice cream."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Daughter''s Dance Class Apparently, it''s not acceptable to ask a mom if her daughter''s dance class has horizontal or vertical brass poles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you guys know what love is? Love is when your heart melts and comes out the tip of your penis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know why Trump fans are called Trumpettes? You only have to learn how to press three buttons, and then you can play ''em all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no headache tablets in the jungle? Because the parrots-eat-em-all', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a womans favorite game? Pool (billiards)... It''s the only one with a kitchen!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell a boy tree from a girl tree? Boy trees have woodpeckers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a pack of pencils and one was unsharpened. I thought it was pretty pointless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a new black router today... I think I''m gonna name it Martin Router King', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid: why is my cousin named Diamond? Mother: because your auntie really loves diamonds Kid: well what about my name? Mother: never mind about that Richard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I almost had to go the hospital today because a stranger threw a can of Pepsi at me... I''m just glad it was a soft drink. Otherwise, I would have had to get surgery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? Art.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once quit drinking, smoking and having sex with random women... ...these were the two most horrible minutes of my life!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which President had the shortest term? Grover Cleveland. He was the twenty second President.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People ask me why I don''t have a facebook and I tell them I''m tired of people questioning everything that I do... It''s always "Jim, where were you between 10pm and 4am on Saturday night?" and "Jim, do you know the person shown in this picture?" and "Jim, does this hammer with the blood of the deceased person in this picture belong to you?" I just don''t need it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('a man and a woman who had never met before but were both married to other people found themselves assigned to the same sleeping compartment on a trans-continental train. though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper bunk and she in the lower. at 1 a.m., the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, "ma''am, I''m sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet and get me a second blanket? I''m awfully cold." "i have a better idea," she replied. "just for tonight, let''s pretend that we''re married." "wow! that''s a great idea!" he exclaimed. "good," she replied. "get your own fucking blanket." after a moment of silence, he farted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sven and Olly Sven and Olly have a cow, Margaritte, who stops drinking water and is about to die of dehydration. In a stroke of genius, the duo grab a hose and take Margaritte to the stream. While Sven holds Margaritte''s head in the water, Olly jams the hose into her butt and starts sucking. They figure this will pull the water up through the cow, saving her life. Olly gets winded pretty quick though and asks Sven to come do the sucking while Olly will hold Margaritte''s head underwater. Sven comes back, grabs the hose, pulls it out of Margaritte, spins it around and puts the end Olly was sucking on into Margaritte, and begins sucking on the other end. Olly gasps and says "What are you doing?!" Sven says "I aint be sticking my lips where you be sticking yours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three kinds of people in this world Those that can count and those that cannot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get the fuss over Trump''s "alternative facts" He''s just alt-right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a chocolate maker who has a dick dad? Will-Ivanka', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU By forgetting my wife was allergic to seafood when I got her supper from Subway Woops, wrong Sub.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the similarity between a pizza delivery guy and a gynecologist? They both work with crust.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a starship captain who empties space septic tanks? William Shartner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a woman in a bathtub and a woman in a church? The woman in church has hope in her soul.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was hiking once with my girlfriend I was hiking once with my girlfriend. Suddenly a huge brown bear was charging at us, really mad. We must have come close to her cubs. Luckily I had my 9mm pistol with me. One shot to my girlfriend''s kneecap was all it took. I could walk away at a comfortable pace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In all fairness, Trump can''t release his tax returns At least not until Putin sends him his W2s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only difference between Hitler and Stalin... is that I know who Hitler is. Credit- Community', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I said hello to a feminist... my court trial is tomorrow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alcohol is nothing but poison But I drink because there are just things inside of me that need to die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sumo wrestler''s gaze? The thousand lard stare', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Teen aged boys so good at fishing? Because they''re Master Baiters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do gay nerds say goodbye on friday? Have a nice geekend!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a woman tels you it''s five minutes, then it''s five minutes. Don''t need to ask her every quarter of an hour.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a smelly fellow that makes bad jokes? Pungent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks down a street with his dog Stranger: hey that''s a nice dog Man: yes but I''m afraid I''m going to have to put him down Stranger: ah how sad, why so? Man: he''s fucking heavy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Middle Eastern sheepherder say when he was asked what animal he was herding Islam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting a prostate exam doesn''t make you gay... Unless you spend all day studying for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was relaxing on a long train ride. When the train started to shudder and shake. This was normal, the man didn''t even open his eyes. However, it went on for about 3 minutes, tossing and turning and when it finally stopped, he asked the ticket man what had happened. "I am sorry sir, we ran over a rabbit" "A rabbit? It lasted for a few minutes!" "I know sir, we had to chase it through 2 fields!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a pirates least favorite letter? Dear sir, Your internet service has been disconnected due to terms of service violations and excessive downloading. Please return modem and accessories to your nearest Comcast location. Sincerely, Comcast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a penguin Drinking his coffee a police officer watches a man walking down the block with a leashed penguin. He goes outside to confront the offender. "Take that penguin to the zoo or you''re going to jail" "We are on the way now" Uninterested in the penguin ruining his car, he let the man go on his way. The next day the man walked by with no penguin. Baffled, he confronted him again. "Where''s the penguin I thought I told you to take him to the zoo? "I did." "Well then where the hell is he now?" "Still there protesting with the other animals."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A book fell on my head a moment ago... I can only blame my shelf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My colleagues call me the pussy slayer... I''m in charge of euthanising cats at the kennel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come newspapers make so much money? Because they make money off Paper Views', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman runs into a doctors office... and says DOCTOR! DOCTOR! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts! The doctor replied, Show me. So the woman poked her ankle and screamed of pain. Then she poked her knee and yelled OW. She poked her forehead and screamed again. She was about to continue when the doctor said, Thats enough, let me think this over. He thought for about a minute and said I think I know what your problem is. You broke your finger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The March for Life is all fine and well..... But why are we forgetting the January and February for Life?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump impression I showed my gf my Donald Trump impression and she hated it. She got the last laugh though, turns out its the wrong time of the month to grab her by the pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not Horny..... A trucker who has been out on the road for two weeks stops at a brothel outside Atlanta. He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down $500 and says, "I want your ugliest woman and a grilled cheese sandwich!" The Madam is astonished. "But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my finest ladies and a three-course meal." The trucker replies, "Listen, I ain''t horny. I''m homesick."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Blondes and the Bermuda triangle have in common? They both swallow a lot of Seamen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Minnesota''s worst air disaster occurred earlier today... ...when a Cessna 152, a small two-seater plane, crashed into a Norwegian cemetery there early this morning. Ole and Sven, working as search and rescue workers, have recovered 826 bodies so far, and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jew family invites guests for dinner There is bread on the table but no one''s touching that. Jew from the kitchen: - Should I bring the chicken now? Another jew shouts back: - No, they haven''t finished bread yet !! Guests quickly eat the bread. Jew brings in the chicken and it finishes all the bread crumbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 5999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does u/sername do at a grocery store? Username checks out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to prison and met my cell mate. He asks me,"Do you want the top, or bottom bunk?" Surprised, I replied,"I''ll have the top bunk." His next question is ,"Do you want to be mommy, or daddy?" "Daddy," I say, obviously... "Okay, get over here and sit on mommy''s dick." Edit: mommy''s dick is possesive', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what grinds a Germans gear? Nothing, they are too well engineered. Edit: Spelling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now that Donald Trump is actually building the wall, I hear Mexicans are depressed I''m sure they''ll soon get over it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know why a gun is better than a wife? You can put a silencer on a gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does trump wear a tie? If he takes it off, the foreskin flies up over his head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Germans favorite letter? I don''t know but it''s Nazi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control? A trip without the kids', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most popular sport in northern Spain? Basquetball', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guess what! Chicken butt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the pizza palor owner who got busted for child porn? He was a real pizza shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One thing our presidents have never owned. a vagina.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Hitler''s favorite color to use when painting? Aryan white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexico: Knock Knock DonaldTrump: Who''s there? Mexico: Taco Trump: Taco who? Mexico: Knock Knock Trump: Who''s there? Mexico: Taco Trump: TACO WHO!!! Mexico: Knock Knock Trump: Who''s there? Mexico: Orange Trump: Orange who? Mexico: Orange you glad we didn''t rape You with a Taco full of drugs (Insert thread far funnier than this joke here)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy says to God: "God... ... to you a minute is like a million years and a penny is like a million dollars. So, could you give me a penny?" God replies "Sure, in a minute"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked a Chinese girl for her number... She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free Sex Tonight! I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cat is walking home alongside a stream When he sees a sausage floating down it. Not to miss an opportunity he pulls it out with his paw and takes it home for his wife and kittens for supper. The next day he decides to walk by the stream again, as luck would have it there''s another sausage but this time bigger than the last. It takes two paws into pull it out, then takes it home to feed his wife and kittens. The following day he sees an even bigger sausage this time he reaches in and it takes him 3 paws to pull it out almost slipping in and getting wet. Again his family is loving it. The very next night on the way home a monster of a sausage floating down the stream. It takes all 4 paws to pull it from the water. Of course the cat falls in. The moral of the story, the bigger the sausage the wetter the pussy! (I''ve known this joke since I was 13. So it might be a bit immature for you guys)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I remember one day I was at Grandpa''s farm and I asked him about sex. He sort of smiled and said, "Maybe instead of telling you what sex is, why don''t we go out to the horse pasture and I''ll show you." So we did, and there on the ground were my parents having sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a synthesizer-guitar that''s out of tune? A Synthaxe error!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a tight pair of pants and a cheap motel have in common? No ballroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m giving up alcohol for a month. Wait, that came out wrong. I''m giving up. Alcohol for a month.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in a job interview today. The interviewing manager handed me his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me." ... So I put the laptop under my arm, walked out of the building, and went home. Eventually he called my mobile and said, "Bring it back here right now!" I said, "$200 and it''s yours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the german sausage?... ....just as well, it was the wurst.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Israeli doctor says "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the person who graduated last in their class from medical school? Doctor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kaddish is a hymn of praises to God found in a Jewish prayer service. What is its Muslim equivalent? A kaboom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a terrorist''s favourite melee weapon? A boomerang.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Offensive] A Muslim an Atheist and a Hindu get stuck on the side of a road. A nearby farmer decides to let them stay at his house but he only has two beds so he says one of them will have to sleep in the barn. The Atheist volunteers first and goes to sleep in the barn. However he knocks at the door of the house 15 minutes later and complains that he can''t take the smell. The Hindu offers to take his place because he is used to bad smells from his childhood in India. However less than 5 minutes later the Hindu knocks at the door of the house and explains he cannot sleep there because there is a cow in the barn and they are too sacred to sleep by in his religion. Finally the Muslim offers to take his place in the barn. Much to the farmers annoyance there is one more knock at the door and the now very angry farmer is surprised to see his goat in shock at the door. "I can''t sleep in there, man..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a dove represents peace which bird represents true love? The swallow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend cheated. Never playing Texas Hold ''Em with her ass again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m actually reasonably happy with Trump''s presidency right now..... after all, he''s had the nuclear codes for a couple of days now and hasn''t tweeted them yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much cocaine can Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently wrote a book about Poltergeists... I''m pleased to say they''re flying off the shelves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do ants not go to church? Because they are in sects!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Left my wife because of another woman.... Her mother !!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do the french like roller coasters? Weee weee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So you think your dad is an alcoholic? You should see my liquor cabinet!! Haha...ha... Its empty. I need help.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cats make better medical technicians than dogs? Because dogs can''t operate MRI machines, but catscan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To whomever stole my copy of Microsoft Word... I will find you. You have my Word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that my neighbors really like the metal song i''m playing on my 7.1 sound system I figured because he thrown a brick at my window to hear it better ! \m/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always thought that the brain was the most important organ Now that I think about it, what''s telling me that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that Donald Trump actually has a beautiful full head of hair? It''s an alternative fact!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best thing about having a penis... is sharing it with people who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a robotic contraceptive? Intelligent Protection Neutralizer for Girls, otherwise known as I P N Girls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I heard that my toaster wasn''t water resistant... I was shocked!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is watching the news with her husband..... A blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says, "Six Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident." The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing, "That''s horrible!" Confused, he replies, "Yes Dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is always that risk involved." After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, "How many is a Brazilian?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the butcher that backed into his meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dyslexic friend sobbed uncontrollably as he confessed that he kept spelling his own name backwards I really do feel for Bob.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the deaf teacher give his deaf students their homework instructions? He assigned it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A radio station in Ireland is taking calls to find a word that is commonly used but isn''t in the dictionary yet... The first caller get''s through, "Hello! What word do you think should be in the dictionary?" "Goan!" "Goan? Can you use it in a sentence?" "Yeah, go''an fuck yerself!" The caller then begins laughing until the station can cut off his call. After several more calls they get another man, "And what''s your word sir?" "Smee!" "Can you use it in a sentence?" "Aye! S''mee again! Go''an fuck yerself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Hillary do when she loses a game of CS:GO? She blames the Russians.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a robot do during sex? He nuts and bolts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was sitting in traffic today and I got run over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump hates saying "yes" to Mexicans so much We may as well call him the "Not Si" President', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I really like Trump and his policies. But I also would really like to see the end of the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to water his garden... He didn''t have a hose or a watering can, so he improvised by filling a bucket with water and throwing it all over the garden. However, when he did so, the water only landed on every other plant. Shocked, the man threw his arms up in the air and shouted "water the odds!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the malfunctioning register at the liquor store? Everything''s coming up ros''s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and doesn''t work? Decaf coffee you racist fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the English teacher propose to Webster? She wanted to Merriam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are we having chicken tonight? OK, well keep me abreast of that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It must be very confusing to have sex with William Shatner. You never know if he loves it or hates it. No, don''t, stop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found out I can''t cross the border while wearing a long sleeve shirt... Apparently, you aren''t allowed to carry concealed weapons across the border.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Refrigerator rabbit A man opens his refrigerator and is shocked to see a rabbit inside. He asks the rabbit, "What on earth are you doing in there?!" The rabbit says "this refrigerator is a Westinghouse, isn''t it?" Confused, the man says "well, yeah, so?" The rabbit replies "well, I''m westing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor says I need to avoid trans fats I''m really going to miss Tumblr', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus tried to solve a Rubik''s cube He died on the cross.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the strongest days of the week? Saturday and Sunday, the rest are weekdays. I know, I know... even I''m ashamed of myself for posting this!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a religious person testifies in court... ...does that mean they''re a Jehovah Witness?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit censorship is getting out of hand [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don''t know what he laced them with, but I''ve been tripping all day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a feminist and a bomb vest? A bomb vest does something when triggered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Boba Fett''s favorite magazine? Sarlacc Digest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This morning I was sitting on a park bench next to a homeless black man. I started a conversation by asking him how he ended up this way. He said, "Up until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to eat, my clothes were washed and pressed, I had a roof over my head, I had TV and Internet, and I went to the gym, the pool, and the library. "I was working on my MBA on-line. I had no bills and no debt. I even had full medical coverage." I felt sorry for him, so I asked, "What happened? Drugs? Alcohol? Divorce?" "Oh no, nothing like that," he said. "I was released from prison."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate eating vegetables... The wheelchair is always getting in the way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that psychic dwarf that escaped from prison? They''re a small medium at large', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Eminem serve weak coffee? You only get one shot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student walks up to their teacher. Student: "Teacher, would you ever get mad at me for something I didn''t do?" Teacher: "Of course not! why?" Student: "Because I didn''t do my homework"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(long) All the knights in the Kingdom we''re leaving for the Crusade. One knight told his trusty servant, "My bride is the most beautiful woman in the country. If I die, I do not want such beauty to be wasted. So I''m leaving you the key to her chastity belt to be used if I do not return from my journey." The knights had only gone a short distance when they heard a horse charging up behind them. Thinking it might be an important message, the men halted. The horseman who approached was the Knight''s servant. "hey" he said. "You gave me the wrong key!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid: "Mom, am I ugly?" *Mom:* "I told you not to call me mom in public."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend told me to f*ck her like a man So I put it in her ass and called her Jeff', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I support equal rights Equal rights = Equal fights', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a thief and a pervert? A thief ~~steals~~ snatches your watch, a pervert watches your snatch. EDIT: I''ve done fucked it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl really wants to borrow her step-dad''s Porsche So she goes and asks him if it''d be okay to use it for the night. The step-dad, being the pig that he is, says "I''ll let you borrow it if you suck my dick." At first she is repulsed by this but then starts thinking of how cool she would look in a Porsche for the night with her friends. "Alright but you can NOT tell anyone about this"! "Of course" he says. She begins but is quickly disgusted and pulls away. "Oh my god, your dick tastes like shit" she yells. The step-dad snaps his fingers "that''s right, your brother has the Porsche tonight".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a seals favorite tool to use? A club as it seals the deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man marries a Chinese restaurant waitress... On their wedding night, she says to him - Bride: "Dear husband, I want to give you anything you want! Just name it!" Groom: "Ooh, that''s tough to chose. OK, I really want a sixty nine." Bride (confused): "You want beef broccoli *now*?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Hunters make the best lovers? They go deep in the bush, shoot more than once and eat what they shoot at.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you titillate an ocelot? You oscillate its tits a lot. (What number is this old joke?)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 3.14 meter long snake ! What do you call a 3.14 meter long snake ? - a "Py"thon What do you call a 43 kilometre long snake ? - a marathon !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I took this babe back to my place. . . . . . for a solid three and a half minutes of shagging. We''re lying there afterwards and she asks, "Why don''t you have a clock in your bedroom?" "I do have a clock - a wall clock." "What''s a wall clock?" So I bang on the wall. From next door a voice, "Hey asshole! Don''t you know it''s 3 in the morning?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call three Mexicans that jumped the border? Trespassers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two wrongs don''t make a right But two wrights make an airplane', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a grocery store and my crush? I can get a date from the grocery store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To whom was Shia LaBeouf chanting "*He will not divide us*" after he got arrested yesterday? His buttcheeks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do women fake orgasms ? Because they think we care. :P', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother is a 10 On the Richter scale When she walks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the iguana get it up? He had a reptile dysfunction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is a door not a door? When it''s ajar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the year 2040 Barron Trump runs for president of USA His platform: THE DOME.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Buddhist monk say when he approached the hotdog stand? Make me one with everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the definition of relative humidity? When the sweat from your balls runs down the crack of your sisters ass ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Armies are Matched Against Each Other Both armies are rather large in size, and have been fighting on the front for many days. Both sides are running very low on ammo, and have already run out of ammunition for their cannons, so they continue to fire with their rifles. Eventually, all of the ammo for their rifles runs out. A private runs up to his general: "General, we''ve used all of our ammunition! The only form of defense we have is our fists!" "Our fists?" "Yes, sir!" "Well," said the General, "I have a plan. We''ll have all of our troops line up, run collectively up to the enemy, and then, once we approach them, we''ll beat them up! They''ll never see that coming!" The private smiles. "That''s a great idea, sir!" "I''ll put it into action," the General said. He yelled loudly to all of his troops: "Okay men, let''s set up a punchline!" (I''m so sorry)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I started investing in Egyptian tourism Until I realized it was just a pyramid scheme', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Forget everything you learned in college... ''Forget everything you learned in college. You won''t need it working here.'' ''But I never went to college.'' ''Well then, I''m sorry. You are underqualified to work here.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trumps is not a thief! He makes alternative purchases', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the opposite of progress? The president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do vaginas have taste buds? Why else would they make flavored condoms?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a gospel singer say to clear his/her throat? a hymn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the French Revolution just like Prohibition? They both got rid of Bourbon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muslim book store in New York: A man asks if they have the latest Donald Trump book on immigration. "Fuck off, get out and don''t come back" says the store owner. "That''s the one!" says the man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of fish is made of two Sodium atoms 2 Na', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The French are debating leaving the E.U. Just like them to run when things get bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do Reavers clean their harpoons? They put them through the Wash.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Freudian slip A couple goes to therapy to try and solve some problems in their marriage. The counselor says that maybe by recounting their morning routine, they can find some unconscious signs revealing deep-set issues. The husband responds, "Well, this morning, something peculiar happened. I was going to ask my wife to pass the butter, but instead of saying ''pass the butter'', I said ''GODDAMMIT WOMAN YOU''RE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I judge Usain Bolt based on his race All of his races, actually.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw an iPhone store get robbed... I guess now I''m an iWitness.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do a German soldier''s hands never get cold? Because they''ve gott mit-uns', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new corduroy pillows? They''re making headlines!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like parking spaces... The best ones are usually taken, so when no one is looking, stick it in the disabled one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what grinds my gears? Do you know what grinds my gears? I have to read the aforementioned title twice for most jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my American friend the truth about living in North Korea... and now I''m typing this message from a Coffin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the least subtle way to intimate that you are interested in coital relations? Thrust and say: I am in... Wink and say: to mate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three jews walk into a bar I lied, it was a gas chamber', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once this whole "global warming thing" melts the ice caps We''re gonna have a canoe world order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the car enthusiast have trouble getting a BMW tattoo on his belly? Because he had an Audi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hard candy At the horse races, the inspector observes that a coach is giving something to one of the horses. Inspector: - What is this pill?! - This is just some hard candy. I eat them, and this horse likes them as well. Want to try? - Well, why not... Before the start of the race the coach tells his jockey: - To avoid any suspicions, stay in the middle until the last lap. At the end, you should be able to overtake everybody easily. If someone is about to overtake you, don''t worry, it''s either me or the inspector.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best part about living in a black family? You never have to hear a dad joke. Edit. Just thought of this at work one day hope it''s not a repost', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to buy some condoms today, and I said to the pharmacist, ''Excuse me, I need some condoms.'' He said, ''Just a minute.'' And I said, ''Yep, that''s my brand.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Photographers are so violent. They''ll frame you, shoot you, blow you up and then hang you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People at work say i''m unnecessarily rude ... but i say fuck those cunts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the rooster cross the road? To get to the other year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is working on word problems with her students A teacher is working on word problems with her students and asks, "if there are 3 birds on a fence and you shoot one, how many are left?" A boy raises his hand and says, "zero. Because if you shoot one the other two fly away" The teacher responds, "no, there''s two left but that''s creative and I like the way you think." After that the boy says "ok, three women are sitting on a bench eating ice cream. One is biting it, one is licking it, and one is sucking it. Which woman is married?" The teacher says, "well I guess the one sucking it." The boy replies, "no, it''s the one wearing a wedding ring but I like the way you think."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A drummer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Two: one to change the light bulb, and another to hold the ladder. Safety is important, you racist fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what kind of work do you do? "I move cows" "Oh , so you''re a rancher?" "Not really , I''m a zumba instructor"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On her deathbed my wife said, "Sweety, I will see you in Heaven." Since then I have kicked a puppy, stole from 4 shops and set fire to an orphanage.!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than a girl falling asleep during sex? A girl waking up during sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girls always tell me that I have the body of and greek god ...At least when it comes to the dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just went to Taco Bell Got 6 tacos and a drink, the bill was $6,823.54', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the houses that fell in love? They had a lawn-distance relationship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Couples, the key to keeping your bedroom fresh Febreze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Toughest time of my Life I had the toughest time of my life. First, I got angina pectoris and then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering from these, I got tuberculosis, double pneumonia and phthisis. Then they gave me hypodermics. Appendicitis was followed by tonsillectomy. These gave way to aphasia and hypertrophic cirrhosis. I completely lost my memory for a while. I know I had diabetes and acute ingestion, besides gastritis, rheumatism, lumbago and neuritis... I don''t know how I pulled through it. It was the hardest spelling test I''ve ever had.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to change a bedroom light bulb? None, they just beat the room for being black', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Luxembourg invades France! Luxembourg has begun it''s invasion of France. After some minutes the field report comes to the general : ''''We began advancing as ordered but the woodsmen kicked us out.'''' Furious, the general summons his most trusted advisers: ''''Send the tanks!'''' he sais ''''All of them? the advisers ask The general scratches his chin before committing but then he replies : ''''Both of them!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Australians and wetting yourself in the basement have in common? They''re both incontinence down under.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bacteriologist quit her job? She hated being microbe-managed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my girlfriend told me to treat her like a princess. So I put her in a castle and sent some Italian plummer to find her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son wanted to borrow Dad''s car A teenager went to his Father and asked if he could borrow the car for a date. The Father sizes him up and says: "Tell you what-you get a proper haircut and I''ll let you use my car. The teenager had long hair and was quite proud of it, so he thought about the offer. The teenager then gets an idea and says to his churchgoing father: "You know Dad, Jesus had long hair just like mine." The father, without skipping a beat, says: "You know what son, you''re right-and Jesus walked everywhere he went."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did they decide to call a correctional facility a penitentiary? Because calling it penetrationary would''ve ruined the surprise.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend treats me like a god She ignores me till she wants to ask for something', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Let''s see Trump try to ban Muslims from entering the US We''ll just make them in our bathtubs like we did during the prohibition!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Trump and Palpatine have in common? They both took power from a black man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our school should start a calculus club We would all derive fun from it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between illegal and unlawful? One is against the law, the other is a sick bird. Thanks folks, tip your waitresses I''ll be here all day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few years ago, I had a friend who was struggling with some mental health issues. A few years ago, I had a friend who was struggling with some mental health issues. She once admitted to me that she was self harming, and even went so far as shoving pieces of sandpaper inside her vagina until she bled. I told her it would be okay and things would get better, it was just a bit of a rough period for her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a neckbeards favorite linux os? Fedora (cricket cricket)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do an uncircumcised penis and the kkk have in common? They''re both pricks in oversized hoods.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the clock break? Because it was ticked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a paedophile and a roller coaster? You have to be a over 5ft to ride a roller coaster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two carrots are out for a drive in the country Two carrots are out for a drive in the country. They''re having the time of their lives. They''re going fast around the curves and letting the wind in their stalks, just loving it. All of a sudden, they get in a pretty horrific crash and are then rushed to the hospital. One of the carrots is ok, just minor cuts and scrapes, but the other is in pretty bad shape and is rushed into the OR. After hours of operating, the doctor comes out to the other carrot in the waiting room and says, "I''ve got some good news and I''ve got some bad news. The good news is that your friend is going to live. The bad news is that he''s going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just realized why so many car accidents happen in Russia. They''re always Russian around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a agnostic, dyslexic, insomniac? A person who stays up all night wondering if there is a dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to the cannibal who was late for dinner? He got the cold shoulder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A devout Muslim entered a cab in London He curtly asked the cabbie to turn off the radio, because as decreed by his religious teaching, he must not listen to music, because in the time of the prophet there was no music especially western music, which is the music of the infidel. The cab driver politely switched off the radio, stopped the cab, and opened the door. The Arab asked him, "What are you doing?" The cabbie answered, "In the time of the prophet, there were no taxis, so get off and wait for a camel!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can''t make fun of reposted jokes Because they are older than your grandpa and deserve some respect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A General was about to lose in a battle Suddenly a deity came to help and turned the tide to his favor. The general was quite grateful, kneeled down and asked, "What is my savior''s great name?" The deity said, "I''m the god of practice target." The general baffled, asked again, "What merit do I possess, that the God of practice target came to my rescue?" The deity explained, "Well, I came to thank you that you never hurt me on the practice field." Extracted from <> by n}; in Ming dynasty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of music do people with small penises play? D minor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water, Who knows what they did up there, They came down with a daughter. Edit: the -> they', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat... ...NASA has to calculate her into every launch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump is not a rapist. He''s an "alternative romantic."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teenager asks his father to borrow the car... A teenager went to his Father and asked if he could borrow the car for a date. The Father sizes him up and says: "Tell you what: you get a proper haircut and I''ll let you use my car." The teenager had long hair and was quite proud of it, so he thought about the offer. The teenager then gets an idea and says to his churchgoing father: "You know Dad, Jesus had long hair just like mine." The father, without skipping a beat, says: "You know what son, you''re right-and Jesus walked everywhere he went."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The author of the Harry Potter books was trying so hard to be funny. But it wasn''t funny to me. J.K. I was Rowling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Interviewing for waiter position* I feel like I bring a lot to the table', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep Trump busy for the rest of his term? Tell him his twitter phone is in the corner of his office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call equine prostitute with sore throats? Hoarse horse whores', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('David Copperfield is doing his magic show... ...and asks if anyone would like to show him a trick. "I will", replies a guy in the audience, "but I''m going to need your wife Claudia and a table." "Ok," says David and the guy gets on stage. He then bends Claudia over the table, pulls down her knickers and starts fucking her from behind. David is now very pissed off and says, "That isn''t a trick!!!" The guy just looks at David Copperfield and replies, "I know, it''s Fucking Magic."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do my wife and my math teacher have in common? They both love to create problems that I am apparently supposed to solve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the Difference between a Girl and a Woman? Prison', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I read a sign outside my local primary school saying: "Slow children playing." I thought, fucking hell that can''t do much for their self-esteem, but then I realised that they probably won''t be able to read it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that guy who got run over by a steam train? He was chuffed to bits', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend kept asking to be treated like a princess (fixed) So for Valentines day, I surprised her with a fairytale trip to Paris. On the second night we dined at the most beautiful restaurant and after a few drinks I could see the love in her eyes, she was happy, a bit tipsy and giving me that "I''ll deal with you later look". Excited, I requested the bill and we rushed to the car. We''re messing around in the back seats and just as we''re about to reach the end of the tunnel I stop, lock my eyes on hers, she lets out a little gasp as an empty Jack Daniels bottle rolls out from under the driver seat. The chauffeur is hammered, we''re spinning out of control and smash into a bridge support killing us all instantly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are condoms like cameras? They capture your special moments.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend''s dog is starting to act like just like my girlfriend Like she hates it when I cum on her face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Putin, Trump and Merkel are all at a seaside resort having an argument... The topic of the debate is which country has the best submarines. Putin begins, saying "Russian submarines are best in the world! They can stay submerged for weeks at a time before needing supplies." Trump laughs, "Oh no no, AMERICAN submarines are the best in the world. I know it, you know it, everybody knows it! They can go for months without needing supplies!" Merkel opens her mouth to speak, but is interrupted by a large submarine emerging from the water. The hatch opens, and a sailer shouts at them, "Sieg Heil! We need fuel!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the calendar nervous? His days were numbered', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today my dad asked what I was talking to "My imaginary friend" "Oh what''s their name?" "Womens rights"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good nurse always carries a pen A nurse was walking the ward when she noticed a rectal thermometer in her shirt pocket. "Some arsehole has my pen", she muttered to herself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('favorite movie quote of all time *"Use the force Harry"* ~*Gandalf*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are so many businessmen fat? Must be all the inflation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All in a nights work A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, This is your lucky night. Ive got a special game for you. Ill do absolutely anything you want for 300 as long as you can say it in three words. The guy replies, Hey, why not? He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays 300 on the bar, and says slowly. Paint&my&.house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if someone is vegan? They''ll tell you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When, and only then, is it okay to spit into your girlfriend''s face? In case her moustache is on fire!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I buy every comic book I see. . . My friends say I have lots of issues.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you fit 6 million Jews into a car? Send them to clown school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love how when your watching a crime show and they have to tell you that "this is a reenactment". Oh really? You mean you didn''t actually catch the murder on video?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think my new dog thinks he is a blacksmith As soon as I took him inside he made a bolt for the door', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the work of a renowned geologist? Rock solid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend David lost his ID yesterday... We just call him Dav now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much citrus does it take to kill a pirate? None.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are women terrible drivers? Because making sandwiches behind the wheel is a lot harder than making them in the kitchen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman : All men are dogs. Me : Which breed is your dad, bitch?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sex life is just like Star Wars It''s either Han Solo, or I have to use force.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best way to break a shield apart? Seth Rollins with a chair', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a hooker with good manners say after fucking her customer| "I''m so glad you came"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Being a father completely changed me. I''m one of those motherfuckers now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Alamaba boy married a Mississippi girl On their wedding night the girl says to her husband "please be gentle in a virgin." The man became disgusted and walked out of the house. Later at dinner he tells his family what happened. "You made the right choice" said his father "if she ain''t good enough for her brothers she sure as hell ain''t good enough for you"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a southern girl who runs faster than her brothers A virgin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A city girl meets a country boy in a restaurant When the buy asked her out she responded "oh I know you country boys will fuck anything that walks. Pigs, chickens, goats and horses." The boy made a disgusted grin. "chickens???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A poor mexican went to a hill to pray for a way to feed his family As he was praying a black guy was walking nearby with groceries when he dropped his cheese wheel and it rolled to the Mexican. The Mexican grabbed it, praised god, and ran home. When he gets home he instructs his wife to make nachos with the cheese. "Why nachos" asks his wife "we can make so many better meals with this cheese" "No" said the Mexican "god instructs me to make nachos." "What do you mean" asked the wife "As I was praying God sent me the cheese wheel and as I was running home with it I heard him yelling That''s Nacho cheese, that''s nacho cheese!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump has just signed ANOTHER executive order it''s about foreign birds of prey. the order states that any bird, specifically eagles, who have some sort of illness like flu will not be allowed to enter the country. Trump has labelled them - ILL EAGLE IMMIGRANTS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me to fuck her like a man. So I stuck it in her ass and called her Steve', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my friends I had a date with a really attractive girl... they told me she was imaginary, but the jokes on them, because they are too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Browser joke What do we want? Chrome/Firefox: Faster internet! When do we want it? Internet explorer: Faster internet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Would Clint Eastwood be Bad at Restructuring a Business? He can''t remember if he fired 5 or 6.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you all alright?? -YEEES - says audience -No you are all alleft', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought about making a cripple joke... ... but it would be lame.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whoever hates oral... Can just suck my dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do for a living? Nothing edit: just to be clear this isn''t me. The depth of this joke is big', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister died in a car crash She did always want to be a princess', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is so good about dead baby jokes? They never get old', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shout out to tears for fears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I got into an argument she said ''you should treat me like I''m the last woman on earth'' I said- what, lock you down in the basement and let men cum on your face for a million dollars?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a phobia of machetes? Common sense', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The CEO of Ryanair, walks into a pub... Michael O''Leary, the CEO of Ryanair, walks into a pub. The he says to the bartender "Can I have a pint of beer?" The bartender says "Certainly, that''ll be 0.50" He responds with "50 cents? That''s wonderfully cheap!" But then the bartender tells him "And it''ll be 1 for the glass, 3 if you want to sit down, 7 if you stand up, 15 to use the loo... "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long has Michael J. Fox had Parkinson''s disease? About 30 years, just amazing, thought he would have shaken it off by now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend was bleeding, and the first aid book told me to apply pressure. So I told him if he didn''t stop bleeding right away, he''d die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got kicked out of the library today I got kicked out of the library for putting the women''s rights book in the fiction section', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and my friend used to like playing war growing up one day i went to his parents house and told them their son died', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have beef- -aroni.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a video game developer who''s not that hard? Ubisoft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You cant expect an honest person to beat Usain Bolt... Only a cheetah can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] What is the worst part about eating a bald pussy? Putting the diaper back on when you''re done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Eminem made of? He is made of Mathers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was fed up with being burgled and robbed every other day in my neighbourhood... The alarm system was of no use so I tore it out and deregistered from our ineffective local Neighbourhood Watch. Instead, I''ve Planted a Syrian, Afghanistan, Yemeni and Iranian flag in four corners of my front garden. Now, The city police, The National Security Bureau, MI-5, MI-6, The CIA And Every Other Intelligence Service In Europe... Are All keeping watch on my house 24x7 x 365..... I''m followed to and from work every day and my wife too when she goes out shopping. So no one bothers us at all...I''ve never felt safer. All Thanks To these Flags!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what the scientific name of Viagra is? Mycoxafloppin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a clan for chickens? Coo clucks clan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Potter household Voldemort: knock knock James: who''s there? Voldemort: you know James: you know who? Voldemort: correct James: James: Fuck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He drank the coffee before it was cool =', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of fishing line is best for taking out a group of 1st graders? A Sandy Hook Yes, I''m sorry. Yes, I stole this from Facebook', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So who was the first knight at the round table? Cir-cumference!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom named her vacuum Slayer It''s been around since 1981 and has fucking sucked ever since.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A crossfitter, a Texan, and a vegan walk into a bar. How do you know? They all tell you within 3 seconds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad Dad Joke So my Dad told me this joke that was so bad, he only told it to me once. "I''ll be right back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a post on r/Jokes is unoriginal? It makes the front page.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An apple a day... Keeps the non-binary away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I knocked up my Jewish girlfriend; Now we have a little Jew in the over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Slept like a log last night Woke up in the fireplace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Its a heart joke to tell Doctor: Sir, you need a heart transplant! Patient: oh no! What can be done! Doctor: we have two hearts available; 1. Is from a healthy donor who was very fit and was young. It is $10,000 2. Is from an obese, lazy alcoholic who did heroin. It is $20,000 Patient: why is the alcoholic''s more expensive? Doctor: he was a lawyer; it''s never been used.. Sorry if it has been told; can''t be arsed to find out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which bees produce milk? The boo-bees!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the jazz fan name his pachyderms? He called his elephants Gerald.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the kid with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves! Nah, just kidding. He hasn''t unwrapped it yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New movie coming out about a golden retriever who helps a deaf boy. It''s called "Ear Bud."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old guy An old guy with his 80''s went to the doctor for a check up. Doctor asks -How is your life going on how do you feel? Man replies: - Everything perfect. I feel great. I just married with an 18 years old. And you know what she is pregnant. Doctor nods his head and - Let me tell you a story. - there was this guy who enjoys hunting deers with his gun. That day he took his umbrella instead of the rifle. He saw a nice deer just behind the woods , aimed and bum. Deer was shot felt to the ground. The old guy shouts - Come on that''s not possible someone else should have done it. Doctor: - You are absolutely right!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexico''s president says he will not go to the U.S. for a meeting with Trump The wall''s not even finished and it kept a Mexican out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Irish lumberjack. An Irishman wanted to start a logging business. Since he couldn''t possibly make as much money felling trees by himself as he would with some workers helping him, he put out a simple ad flyer in town square: tree fellers needed. Later in the day, two other Irishmen, Sean and Patrick, walk by and notice the ad. Sean turns to Patrick and says "if only Seamus was with us, then we would get the job"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Princess Diana has dandruff? They found her Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me to treat her like a princess... So I crashed her into a wall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some day, Canada will take over the world. And then we''ll all be sorry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m going to start calling my roommates dog Dray After Draymond Green, because there is no way that is part of her natural jumping motion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whilst laying in bed with my girlfriend I turned to her to say "I love you so"... She replied, "I love you so too!" We then proceeded to discuss how one could not love Yoo So, for our Chinese friend is nothing but a delight to be around! *Works better said aloud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a KKK member''s favorite game? Hangman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar for every time someone over 40 told me my generation sucks... Then I could afford a house in the economy they ruined.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a lot I don''t get about women The main thing being their phone number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Asked my dad what he thought about my new haircut... He said it was "obsolete", so I told him that I was actually a trendsetter. He said "Yes. That trend set many years ago".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you tell a nazi with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told Richard Spencer twice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come you never see third class mail? Third class envelopes are disproportionately likely to be lost in the voyage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LPT: How to stop procrastinating Step one: Prepare to do whatever it is that you need to do Step two: Do it tomorrow. This frees you from the work you would have done grudgingly, which decreases the quality anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much do noodles cost? How much do noodles cost? About a penne.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s another name for a Japanese demon dog? A pupper-oni.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We''re two days into the Chinese New Year, the year of the rooster and I''m still writing year of the monkey on my checks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I have this dilemma... I have an unopened box of condoms in my dresser, but I check recently and it turns out they expired. Now idk if I should buy more or not because on one hand I want to be prepared but on the other hand I don''t want to waste another $7', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whale junior: Dad, where did I come from? Papa whale: From my penis. Whale junior: Umm thanks? Papa whale: You''re whalecum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What movie did Trump watch with his family tonight? Wall-E', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, I''ve got to masturbate. "Two maths debate! I knew I had high expectaisians!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do European generals keep their armies? In their sleevies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do we want! "Hearing aids!" "When do we want them!" "Hearing aids!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Welcome to jim''s seafood shack and brothel... (nsfw) The crabs are buy one get one free', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Nsfw] How do you know you have a high sperm count? She has to chew before swallowing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can we not have sex tonight? I''m tired "Hi Tired, I''m dad"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binary, and those who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a donkeys favourite breakfast cereal? Mule-sli', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not that Trump is a traitor. He''s an "alternative patriot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Mexican midget barbers favorite restaurant? Little Cesar''s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Pikachu was a Nazi... ...would his name be Gasajew?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not bashing Trump I''m providing "alternate praise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried singing for my supper today. Looks like I''m having rotten tomato soup tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know why I drink apple juice? Because OJ will kill you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the underwear of someone experiencing nocturnal emissions? Dreamcatchers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my coffee I don''t like coffee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the third hand on a clock? Second hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had my FIRST THREE WAY!!! There were a couple of no-shows, but I STILL HAD A GREAT TIME!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do lexicographers compile dictionaries? They scrabble about for words.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a veteran begging in the street which made me very upset But then I remembered I wasn''t required to give the military quarters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called when a politician craps his pants in a Honda? Civic doody.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doesn''t matter if you support him or not, you got to give Trump credit for being the first elected official who is not breaking his campaign promises. We are all so used to politicians forgetting their campaign promises once elected. I am sure if Hillary had won, not even her supporters would expected her to deliver on all her promises. But not Trump. The man said he will F'' this country up, and true to his words, he is doing just that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A reporter wants to hear people''s opinion on the local meat shortage... The reporter saw a group of women talking to each other on a street corner, and decided to interview them. The group consisted of an American, a Chinese woman, an Ethiopian and an Israeli. "Excuse me, but could each of you give me your opinion on the local meat shortage?" asked the reporter. "What''s a shortage?" said the American. "What''s an opinion?" said the Chinese woman. "What''s meat?" said the Ethiopian woman. "What the fuck does ''excuse me'' mean?" said the Israeli.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill So Jack could lick Jill''s fanny. Jack got a shock and a mouthful of cock ''cause Jill''s a goddam tranny!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come there are no Olympics in Mexico? Because all of the Mexicans that can run jump and swim are already in America.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m deathly afraid of elevators. I take a lot of steps to avoid them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two antennas that got married? It was a nice ceremony....but the reception was amazing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is the only way to resist Trump''s agenda leave a mouse trap in front of your vagina.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In His Lust For Knowledge The Mathemagician con-summed himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here I was thinking that 2016 was over And now it came back for Moore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shout-out to my arms For always being by my side', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the chicken cross the road? Alternative facts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes life is like toilet paper.. You are either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A company testing on animals just got sued for testing a chapstick on horses that made their lips burn off. They called it neigh-balm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was getting very late and my niece was getting scared. "Uncle Davey, I am scared walking out here in the forest." "You?? What about ME!? I have to walk back all by myself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a blue whale and a sperm whale? Depends on if she lets me nut or not.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do dads keep their jokes? In their dadabase.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Trump Administration releases the contractor hired to build the infamous wall Bill DeWall, Inc.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What breed of dog is the most depressing...? A melancholy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend kept telling me to treat her like a princess. So I made her marry an old guy she''s never met to secure an alliance with the French.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As Jeff the street sweeper says "A clean place is not where one sweeps, but where one doesn''t litter" That''s why he traded in his broom for a shotgun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The anti-vax movement just got its first clothing sponsor Polio Ralph Lauren', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the pig when he got laryngitis...? He was dis-gruntled!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What drink does hitler hate the most? JUUUUICE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear who Ryan Reynold''s wife turned into when she found out he was having an affair? Blake Deadly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried making a chemistry joke today... ... But all the good element jokes Argon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ivanka is pregnant again, her new baby boy is due in October. She should call him Wally.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Zwitterion walks into a bar... A Zwitterion walks into a bar. The bartender asks him about his job. The Zwitterion says, "Eh, there''s some positives and negatives about it".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I couldn''t decide how to propose to the love of my life So I decided to ask her husband for advice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PAul McCartney goes to the doctor As he steps in the doctor grabs his coat and the nurse takes his temperature it comes out to 88 degrees, she grabs a new thermometer and still he''s 88 degrees, she goes to grab the doctor. Her and the doctor whisper worriedly as they look back at McCartney, the doctor then walks back to the man who''s now concerned, and says "sir, according to the thermometers you have severe hypothermia!" Paul just scoffs and replies"you had me worried for a second!" the doctor counfusedly asks why, and McCartney replies "I''m always below 90 degrees... I''m the acute one"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dave lost his left arm and left leg in an accident 3 years ago. Don''t worry, he''s all right now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gay man goes to the doctor and is diagnosed with AIDS The man is of course devastated, but asks the doctor if there is anything that can be done. "Yes," says the doctor. "Go home and eat a pound of Chili, one dozen of unpeeled carrots, three cups of bran, half a pound of jalapeos, half a pound of licorice, and wash it all down with a gallon of prune juice." "Will that cure me?" asks the patient hopefully. "No," replies the doctor. "But it will teach you what your asshole is for."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pilot gets ready for the flight "Alright everyone, we will be taking off in a minute, please remain seated.", he says. After taking off, the pilot forgot the microphone on. "Know what I want now?", says the co-pilot, "a cup of coffee and a woman to suck my dick". Noticing the problem with the mic, one of the attendants bolts off to warn them. While she ran, someone on the back seats yells "Don''t forget the coffee!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix a bell with poop? Duuuuuuung', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A truck load of Viagra was stolen yesterday Police don''t know who did it, but they''re on the lookout for hardened criminals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day I snuck a peek at my shrink''s notes and I saw she''d written "MESSIAH COMPLEX" in big capital letters. It caught me off guard. I''ve known I''m the messiah all of my life but I''ve never been called complex before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Trump played soccer in high school? He was a goalkeeper, set up a wall like you''ve never seen...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No one talked about it but the threat level was raised on January 20th, 2017 They raised it to orange.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has nine arms and sucks? Def Leppard', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a fight in the fish n chips shop the other day The fish got battered!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a dream that I was fighting Jason Bourne, Will Hunting and Tom Ripley Thanks to months of therapy, I''m finally battling my Damons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blind people of Reddit. I was watching a movie called 23 Blast (about a football player that went blind) and was curious if you can see when you''re dreaming. Oh. . . wait a minute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad Joke Kid laugh Edit : I''ve made a huge spelling mistake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to have a weird affliction that caused me to alter all my Reddit posts to add the names of my favourite Frasier and Cheers actors but I''m over it now. Edit: Grammer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s now apparently politically incorrect to say "Black paint" Now you have to say "Tyrone can you please go paint the fence?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at my wife''s friend''s house to pick up some glassware from the last time we all got together And my wife''s friend walks in and says "I want you to take off my shirt" So I take off her shirt, and she says "Now I want you to take off my pants" So I take her pants off, and she tells me to take off her bra and panties, so I take them off. Finally, she says "and if I ever catch you wearing my clothes again I''m going to tell your fucking wife"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t Mexicans good Firefighters? Because they don''t know the difference between "Jos" and "Hose B"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pathetic number of chickens? A poultry sum.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Arnold Schwarzenegger kill insects? Because he''s an ex-terminator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best thing about ISIS jokes? The execution', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear Apple is going into the wine business? Their vineyard will produce every varietal of wine... except ports.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what''s black and doesn''t work? Decaffeinated coffee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Virgin mary enters into heaven as soon as she gets in she notices a hot dog stand. She blushes and giggling says "the holy spirit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the news? What?" "Me neither. "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said she hates Diablo 3 because it''s about demons I said, babe, it''s not about demons, its about gambling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is supporting the minorities The minority of scientists that disbelieve global warming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I climaxed on a blind girl''s boobs yesterday She didn''t see it coming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bury it... ...it''s my dad''s ''dead joke''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a sailor in the navy farts smell like? Seaman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow who''s had an abortion? Decaffeinated', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a brand new cemetery in town Everybody is dying to get in', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Asian guy that always shows up before he needs to? Earl Lee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The biggest lie "I have read the terms and conditions"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jenny Craig I dropped 40 pounds on Jenny Craig. I think I broke her leg!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I head the singer of "Chandelier" is visiting my town I''m looking out for her, but I just can''t Sia!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the story about the invisible nymphomaniac? They say you never see her coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Johnny Cash have the Cocaine Blues? He ran out of cocaine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The US should rejoin Great Britain Its not like we mind Taxation without representation anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Trump supporter tells a reporter, "Everyone knows we''re great at taking tests." Reporter: "What gives you that idea?" Trump supporter: "Everyone keeps calling us ''quiz-lings''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A stopped clock is correct two times a day, but how many times is it wrong?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s stay lighter later in the evening. Great now I can your moms ugly face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend just found out that he is both gay and dyslexic. He is still in Daniel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear why the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus shut down? Because the Trump administration is now the greatest show on earth!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me about a wonder food that he discovered that contains protein, fiber, and good fats That''s nuts, I told him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alternate Lyrics: I kissed a Trans and I liked it. The taste of her hairy lap stick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the center of a gay apple''s life? Dcor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the cookie so sad? Because his mother was a wafer so long.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like toilet paper... Life is like toilet paper, youre either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me that if I took her to get sushi, I didn''t have to use a condom after. She''s getting the raw end of that deal!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I read an article recently on Hitler''s speechwriter... Apparently he was a real grammar Nazi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you like your eggs in the morning? Boiled, poached, scrambled or fertilised?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aussie chat up line "...bite on this stick sheila..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s difficult being a dyslexic agnostic I''m never quite sure whether or not there''s a dog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The secret to making your computer a modern racist? Hold Alt+R', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had sex while camping? It''s fucking in tents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy moves way way out to the country... ...miles from anything. One day there''s a knock at the door, and he opens it to find a guy in full hayseed regalia, overalls, thermal shirt, the works. Hick: "Howdy, new neighbor! Would ya like to come to a party at my place tonight?" New guy: "Well, sure! I''m new to these parts, I sure would love to meet the locals." Hick: "I gotta warn ya, there''ll be some drinkin''." New guy: "That''s OK, I could use a drink." Hick: "There''ll be some salty language." New guy: "That won''t bother me." Hick: "...and some rough sex." New guy: "Hey, I''m in! How about if I bring a case of wine?" Hick: "Nah, a bottle should do: it''s just you and me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tortoises ... are nazi turtles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Hawaiian Jihadist say before he died? Aloha Ackbar!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard about the fruit that became a president? He got impeached.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My date was impressed when I said I really want to see her inner-beauty. She was less impressed when I asked to see inside her butt hole to spot it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tickets for the 2017 Superbowl A buddy of mine has two tickets for the 2017 Super Bowl on February 5th -- box seats plus airfare, accommodations, etc., but he didn''t realize when he bought them that this is going to be on the same day as his wedding - so he can''t go. If you''re interested and want to go instead of him, it''s at St Isaac Jogues Catholic Church, in Pickering, at 5 p.m. Her name''s Louise. She''s 5''4", about 125 lbs., good cook, makes a good salary. She will be the one in the white dress . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do batteries feel lonely? Because they are never included in anything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they call "roach-clips", "roach-clips"??? because potholder was already taken. I know it''s like a venn diagram of drug jokes and dad jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad tell me a joke[nsfw] "Hey dad tell me a joke" Dad:"Pussy" Son:"I don''t get it" Dad:"I know hahahaha"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a chickpea and a green pea? Trump wouldn''t pay $1000 to have a green pea on him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NSFW My girlfriend was arrested for riding her bike today. She was charged with peddling pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to a brain store... He asks the owner how much an accountant''s brain sells for. The owner tells him, "We sell that for $6 per pound of brain." He then asks how much a doctor''s brain sells for. The owner tells him, "We sell that for $11 per pound of brain." Finally, the man asks how much a politician''s brain sells for. The owner tells him, "We sell that for $1,000 per 4 oz of brain." The man is astonished and asks why so much. The owner tells him. "Do you know how many politicians we need to kill to find 1 oz of brain?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I posted a question about the brightest star in the night sky, but all I got were joke replies. Should''ve added the [Sirius] tag.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked in on my parents having sex last night... Possibly the most awkward 45 minutes of my life...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come Abraham Lincoln never went to jail? Because he was in a cent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How was there no jackass in a giant penis costume at the women''s March? That would of been hilarious. You would never see feminists beat a dick so hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my wife I wanted to try anal sex She told me she''s been having sex with an asshole for years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a 20th century grammar nazi? Alt-Write', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Need your best Short Jokes One sentence max, I''ll start: A Dyslexic walks into a bra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a Jewish girl''s number? Lift up her sleeve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Artistic people of Reddit, what is being artistic really like? And can I get fries with that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump goes to the doctor... He says, "Listen doc, i get erections. I get the best erections, they''re yuuuuuge, call Sean Hannity, he''ll tell you. I''m having issues in the bedroom, presidential bedroom, and I''m falling flat, unlike my poll numbers. Can I get some Viagra?" The Dr replies, "No, but I can offer you some exercises and herbal remedies to help." Frustrated, Mr. Trump demands,"What kind of medicine do you practice here?!" "Alternative medicine." Edit: added some words and format on mobile', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Purple hate Red? Because she left him feeling Blue', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Albert Einsteins DJ name? MC Squared', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What have women and clouds got in common? It only becomes a nice day after they piss off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends are a lot like trees... They fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man has been shot with a starting pistol... The police are pretty sure it''s race related.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An SEO Expert walks into a bar An SEO Expert walks into a bar, bars, beer garden, hangout, lounge, nightclub, mini bar, bar stool, tavern, pub, beer, wine, whiskey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shout out to all my people with split personality disorder You know who you are', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Blastoise''s favourite sex move? Hydrohump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the fire at the hemp factory? It was high priority for the firefighters to get there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the 8th wonder of the world? Great Wall of Jina', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a new advice podcast for senile Tarantino fans It''s called "I Don''t Remember Asking You a GOD Damn Thing"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 79 year old pirate has his next birthday this morning.... he wakes up and says to his crew, "AYE-matey!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 90''s-2000''s kids will understand I am a financially stable and responsible adult, and my life is completely in order. Excuse me while I go drown myself in alcohol.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did pyramid head always drag his weapon around? Because its illegal to carry!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Does Donald Trump Have in Common With London Dispersion Forces? They are both easily pushed to one side and can take a negative charge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like my salad Undressed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everybody''s making a big deal about the Mexican president canceling his meeting with Trump... The wall isn''t even built yet and it''s already kept out at least one Mexican.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After nine years of being together, I finally got down on one knee. And begged her to take it up the arse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took my kid to a magic show... I took my kid to a magic show last night. The magician announced that for his final trick, he was going to make himself disappear. And so he began to count: "Uno! Dos!" And then he vanished without a tres!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Minecraft is not a video game Real video games have curves', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a couple gets into bed, the husband starts to rub and kiss his wife. She turns over and says, "I''m sorry, honey. I''ve got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The husband sadly turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife. "Do you have a dentist appointment, too?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So there''s a teacher.. One day the teacher decides to skip work & cut out his students eyes out for some reason. He puts the eyeballs in a bag & heads down the busy road until he got stopped by the police *Teacher - "What''s the problem, officer"* *Police - "We''re investigating a crime scene"* *Teacher - "Is there any questions that you''d like to ask me?"* *Police - "What''s your alibi from 8 am - 12 pm?"* *Teacher - "I was just chilling with my pupils."* *Police - "Oh, where can I find your pupils?"* *Teacher - "Opens bag"*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Republican libertarians play Xbox more than their friends? They hate it when everything has to be PC.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dating agency for well-to-do herpes sufferers? Elite Shingles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Describe THE WALL in one word Yuuuge!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the hardest part of playing ultimate frisbee? Explaining to your parents that you''re gay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump gets stumped Donald Trump is reading the news and the press calls him a word he does not know the meaning to. "Mike!", he barks. Mike Pence scurries into the office nervously. "Yes Mr. President?" "What does this word mean?", Trump demands. "Huh, I don''t know Mr. President." "What do you mean you don''t know!?" "Well, I''ve only heard it being used to describe women", Pence admits. "What?! How dare they?!" "I need to know it''s meaning" Trump picks up the phone and makes a call. "Yes? Vladimir?... Sorry, Mr. Putin?" "Yes, I know it''s really late in Russia and I apologize, but I''m calling to ask permission to Google the word ''submissive''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a singing laptop? A Dell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Trump supporter decides to protest with his gun outside of a mosque. What should the police do? Nothing. He''ll eventually shoot himself in the foot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Oakland Raiders are moving to Las Vegas. Thus making "went to a Raiders game" yet another thing people won''t talk about when they get home from Vegas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took a vacation to a city in France. It was Nice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the middle east its hard to tell who''s crazy, And Hussein.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Australians don''t have sex They mate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do pirates never quit their jobs? Because once they lose a hand they get hooked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a thought the other day Losing 15 pounds sounds a lot better in America than in England.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a robot do after sex? Nuts and bolts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don''t know y.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad Joke Dad: (Grabs his chest) Call me an ambulance Son: You are........ an ambulance Dad: Proud of you son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of music do astronauts love? Neptunes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A steak pun is A rare medium well done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three fourth grade boys participate in a dick measuring contest... The boys are white, black and Korean. They all three pull out their whangs and measure up. The winner ends up being the black dude by a *long* shot. When the black boy goes home, he goes up to his mom and says "Mooom! Today I got into a contest with the boys where we measured our dicks and I won! Is it because I''m black?? She said "No Tyrone its because you''re 18".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sugar is the only word in English language in which "Su" is pronounced as "Shu". I am pretty sure about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which genre of music appeals to most cheeses? R''n''Brie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I really like Windows as an OS. You could say I have a Micro_soft_ spot for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mayweather fight tickets. I didn''t know where to post this, but I heard this was a popular subreddit so here I go. My friend purchased two tickets to the upcoming Mayweather fight, but he''s now realised that the date of the fight is the same of that of his wedding day. Therefore, he has kindly requested that I give the opportunity for someone on here to take his place. Comment down below for the opportunity to win. Details: Name is Lucy, Pretty, about 5 8" in height...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to Kennedy Space Center to become an astronaut, but the scientists were not very supportive. They just said things like, "You''re not qualified" and "Why are you naked?" and "I CAN''T CATCH HIM HE''S COVERED IN BABY OIL."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the Surgeon General, the Postmaster General, and the General of the Army have in common? I''m running all of their alt twitter accounts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an elephant with Darth Vader? An elevader.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a place with a 98% recycling rate! r/Jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a seamstress reply to someone asking her how her day was? So,so.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shout-out to my grandma Because that''s the only way she can hear me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a guy, it''s not that I have anything against psychiatric wards... I''m just afraid of commitment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We have a strange custom in our office. We have a strange custom in our office. The food has names there. Yesterday for example I got me a sandwich out of the fridge and its name was "Kevin"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife dragged her husband to their marriage counselor appointment with his fishing net. "Do you see what I have to put up with," the wife says. "Yes," said the counselor. "He''s obviously in seine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What climate scientist does Disney follow on twitter? The rogue one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 3 legged dog walks into an Old West Saloon... As he enters a hush falls over the establishment. The piano stops playing, poker games halt as all eyes are on this dog as he walks up to the bar. The 3 legged dog slowly takes out his gun and rests it on the bar top. The barkeep says "What can I do for ya" to which the 3 legged dog sternly replies "I''m looking for the man who shot my Paw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Brazilian...." The blonde replies, "Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('History class During history class at a German school, a young boy raises his hand and asks: "Teacher, is it true that cities in Russia have the longest streets in the world?" Clearly perplexed, the teacher asks the boy, "What led you to believe such an assumption?" "Well, teacher," the boy answer, "my grandpa told me that he and his unit were crawling through one street in Stalingrad for three months and never reached the end of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best part of being a lesbian in 1912? Both got seats on the titanic''s lifeboats.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you call a black guy with a lower body growth disorder? Knee-grow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What camp were jewish pets sent to? Mousevitz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Physicist''s favorite author? Joules Verne', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an emo on a hiking trip? Cliffhanger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Germans say when you send them a fire meme? Danke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two numbers are part of a fraction. The one on top says, "I''m going to run for president!" The one on bottom says, "The hell you are!" Ignoring the bottom number, the top one goes and puts his name in. This angers the bottom number, and he undoes the nomination. He then comes back to the numerator and tells him what he did. "Why''d you do that!?" He replied, angrily. "It''s my job," replied the denominator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 Guys find a Genie in an Indoor swimming pool. Genie: "Okay, all of you will get on the springboard, say what they wish to be in the pool it will be in there." Max: "I want money!" And so he jumps in a pool of money. Peter: "I want Chocolate" and so he jumps into a pool of chocolate. Carl slips off the springboard and screams "SHIT!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To all those that received a book from me for a Christmas present They''re due back at the library today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the detective say when it started to rain I better run don''t want my trench coat to become a drench coat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call hamburger in India ? God', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the opposite of Tim Walken? Tim Daly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you give a man a fish& &Hell eat for a day; teach the man to fish he eats for a lifetime. &he may choke on the bones and die. Think of the liability, and the guilt!! &you dont know if hes allergic. Again, you need to think of the liabilities!! &Hell keep eating your fish; stop giving the man fish, let him fetch his own. &thats worth nothing to him; he cant figure how to fish then he surely cant cook for shit &Hell eat for a day; if you teach the man to fish hell buy a boat and start fishing. Hell start his own fishing company; soon hell have a whole fleet and a booming business. One day you will be buying your own fish from him. &but he should be eating more vegetables instead &God know what kind of fetishes he has&', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I rang the RSPCA hotline... I rang the RSPCA hotline to tell them I''d just found six Badgers in a suitcase by the side of the road "Are they moving?" asked the operator "Not sure" I replied "But that would explain the suitcase"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a priest and a sister? Nun', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was listening to my German Student perform Goldfish by Debussy... Unfortunately, his playing was rather Vichy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Dracula fail math? He forgot how to Count.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why did Saturn get a ring? told god, "if you like it, then you better put a ring on it"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you a good cook? colleage - Oh you cook!! How good of a cook are you? me - the hungrier you are, the better i am.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not sure if Trump will be re-elected I don''t have 2020 vision.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Barak say to Joe on the last day of his presidency? "Bi-den. Keep in touch"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My professor just said that the particle of light is like a bullet... The black objects absorb more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bionic pig? Robocop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the anomaly so poor? Because it didn''t make any cents!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff... Baa dum tssssss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The European Union is disgusting! Absolutely disgusting! EU!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow jumping over a barbed wire fence? Utter destruction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and red all over? A newspaper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, this guy walks into a bar. And says, "ouch".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the opposite of pro is con, isn''t the opposite of progress, congress?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy with no arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a wedding the other day. Two antennas were getting married. It wasn''t much of a wedding ceremony, but it was one heck of a reception!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s this dyslexic guy... he walked into a bra...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joel: "How''s the progress on new house that you are building Pete?" Peter: "Things are really slow at the moment." Joel: "Yeah, I guess all this rain would be putting a dampener on things..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A white horse walked into a bar. The barman saw him and said, "We have a whiskey named after you!" The horse looked puzzled and said, "What, Eric?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a dyslexic insomniac agnostic. He laid awake all night wondering if there really was a Dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the sea? A start.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? A bad golfer goes whack, dang. A bad skydiver goes dang, whack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with wind, but it really doesn''t bother me too much because they never smell and are always silent." "As a matter of fact, I''ve farted at least 20 times since I''ve been here in your office." The doctor says, "I see, take these pills and come back to see me next week." The next week the lady goes back to his office. "Doctor," she says, "I don''t know what you gave me, but now my farts, although still silent, stink terribly!" The doctor says, "Good, Now that we''ve cleared up your sinuses, let''s work on your hearing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: Well I hope you enjoy changing diapers, Mrs Jones? Mrs Jones: Why, Am I pregnant? Doctor: No, you have bowel cancer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blond with half a brain? Gifted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q What has two legs, and bleeds? A Half a dog!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Essex girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I''ll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress," she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "No" she replies. "This time it''s mayonnaise."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk man walked up to an elevator. He pressed the up button and opened the doors before the elevator could come down to him. He fell all the way down, and said, "Darn it, I said up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if you introduce a friend to your wife and sister and he only has to shake one hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A patient wakes up after having surgery to remove a gangrenous leg. Doctor: "I have good news and bad news." Patient: "What''s the bad news?" Doctor: "The bad news is that we amputated the wrong leg." Patient: "That''s terrible! What''s the good news?" Doctor: "We think the other leg is going to make it alright."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, that to get her out of a phone booth we had to grease her thighs and throw a Twinkie into the street.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were cleaning out their attic when the man found a shoe repair stub in the pocket of an old jacket. "Hey - check this out," he said to his wife, "this stub is 20 years old. I wonder if the shop still has the shoes." So the next day the man went to the shoe shop and asked the owner if he still had the shoes. The owner disappeared into the back of the shop for about five minutes. When he returned, he replied happily, "Yup, believe it or not, we''ve still got the shoes. They''ll be ready next Thursday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bishop, a priest, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says, "What is this, a joke?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pope, a hippie, and George Bush were all on a plane that was crashing. The pilots had already jumped to safety and there were only two parachutes left. Without a moment''s hesitation, Bush grabbed a pack, yelled "I''m the most powerful man in the universe! I have to survive!", and jumped from the plane. The Pope, being the generous man that he is, said to the hippie, "You go ahead and take the last parachute. I''m an old man and I have lived a very full life." The hippie thanked the Pope but said, "Don''t worry - we''ll both be fine. The most powerful man in the universe just jumped off the plane with my backpack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Economic times were very bad, so the plant owner had a difficult time finding people to work in his new factory. In an act of desperation, he hired a tribe of cannibals. At their orientation he made it very clear that he would not tolerate any acts of cannibalism in the plant. Three months went by without incident, when all of a sudden a secretary disappeared without a trace. The manager rounded up all of the cannibals. "If I find out that one of you ate the secretary," he said, "I''m going to fire all of you!" and with that, stormed out of the room. After he left the room, one of the cannibals stood up and said, "This is a disgrace! For months we''ve been eating managers and no one has even noticed! Which one of you fools ate a secretary?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jim is in a hot-air balloon, completely lost. He sees a man in a field below and flies down to him. "Excuse me sir, but can you tell me where I am?" The man in the field replied "You''re in a balloon." Jim said "You''re an engineer, aren''t you?" "Why yes, I am. How did you know?" "Because you gave me a perfectly logical, yet completely useless answer." Jim continued flying, when he saw another man in a field. "Excuse me, sir, but can you tell me where I am?" he asked. "Well, you''re about two miles north of Ogdenville. If you go to the west side of town you''ll find an airstrip that you can safely land on." Jim replied "Thank you very much, sir. That was extremely helpful. Say, I''ll bet you''re a manager, aren''t you?" "Why yes, I am, how did you know?" "Because your pants are on backward".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Engineering Major says "How does it work?" A Science Major says "Why does it work?" An Accounting Major says "How much will it cost?" A Liberal Arts Major says "Do you want fries with that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the bulb has got to WANT to change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sitting next to the Pope on a cross-country flight. The Pope was doing a crossword puzzle. He turned to the man and asked "Do you know a four-letter word for ''woman'' that ends in U-N-T?" The man thought for a minute and said "Aunt." "Oh yes, of course," the Pope replied. "Do you have an eraser?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette was walking down the middle of the street, saying "34...34...34" over and over again. A blonde stopped her and asked why she was doing that. "Oh, it''s great fun," replied the brunette. "You should try it". So the blonde walked down the street repeating "34...34...34..." when all of a sudden a car sped by and ran her over. The brunette then started walking down the road again, saying "35...35...35..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a blonde woman has been dating? By the belt buckle imprint on her forehead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde say when she loses her virginity? "So are you guys all on the same team?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many lawyers does it take to shingle the roof of a house? It depends on how thin you slice ''em.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the Polish wolf? He chewed off three legs and was still caught in the trap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A polar bear walked into a bar and said "Can I please have a gin and............................................tonic?" The bartender replied "Sure, but why the large pause?" "I don''t know, I''ve always had them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bartender here?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know diarhea is part of your inheritence? Ya, it flows in our genes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s this guy he goes to see the doctor and says, "Doctor, Doctor, I have a terrible problem. I have a strawberry stuck up my bottom." The doctor says, "It''s ok, I''ll give you some cream to put on it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks an older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions. The old priest suggests, "Cross you arms over your chest, and rub your chin with one hand." The new priest tries this. The old priest suggests, "Try saying things like, ''I see,'' ''yes,'' ''go on,'' ''I understand,'' and ''how did you feel about that?''" The new priest says those things, trying them out. The old priest says, "Now, don''t you think that''s a little better than slapping your knee and saying ''No shit! What happened next?''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before you judge someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you judge them, you''re a mile away and you have their shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When cryptography is outlawed, bayl bhgynjf jvyy unir cevinpl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A veterinarian surgeon had a bad day, but when he got home from tending to all the sick animals, his wife was waiting with a long cool drink and a romantic candle-lit dinner. After dinner, they had a few more drinks and went happily to bed. At about 2:00 in the morning, the phone rang. "Is this the vet?" asked an elderly lady. "Yes, it is," replied the vet, "Is this an emergency?" "Well, sort of," said the elderly lady, "There''s a whole bunch of cats on the roof outside making a terrible noise mating, and I can''t get to sleep. What can I do about it?" There was a sharp intake of breath from the vet, who then patiently replied, "Open the window and tell them they''re wanted on the phone." "Really?" said the elderly lady, "Will that stop them?" "Well, it should," said the vet, "It stopped ME!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Six-year-old Jerry came downstairs bellowing lustily. "What''s the matter?" asked his mother. "Papa was hanging pictures, and he just hit his thumb with a hammer," said Jerry. "That''s not so serious," soothed his mother. "A big man like you shouldn''t cry at a trifle like that. Why didn''t you just laugh?" "I did," sobbed Jerry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a donkey with one leg? A wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye? A winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye making love? A bonky winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind? A stinky bonky winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind, wearing blue suede shoes? A honky tonky stinky bonky winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind, wearing blue suede shoes and playing piano? A plinky plonky honky tonky stinky bonky winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind, wearing blue suede shoes, playing piano and driving a truck? Bloody talented!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of cannibals. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to himself, "Oh God, I''m screwed." The sky darkens and a voice booms out, "No, you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone at your feet and bash in the head of the chief standing in front of you." So with the stone he bashes the life out of the chief. Standing above the lifeless body, breathing heavily looking at 100 angry natives... The voice booms out again, "Okay... NOW you''re screwed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, two monks were in the vaults of the monastery going through the old scrolls. "You see, there are the originals," said the first monk. "All the new scrolls were copied from these." "Can I see one?" "Sure. This is one outlines the rules for monkdom . . " All of a sudden, the monk''s face turns white and he falls to his knees. "What? What does it say?" "Celebrate. IT SAYS CELEBRATE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scottish tourist attended his first baseball game in the US and after a base hit he hears the fans roaring "Run....Run!" The next batter connects heavily with the ball and the Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd in his thick accent: "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-run will ya!" A third batter hits a slam and again the Scotsman, obviously pleased with his knowledge of the game, screams "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run will ya!" The next batter steadfastly holds his swing four times and as the ump calls a walk the Scotsman stands up and yells "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run!" All the surrounding fans giggle quietly and he sits down confused. A friendly fan, sensing his embarrassment, whispers to the Scotsman, "He doesn''t have to run, he''s got four balls." After this explanation the Scotsman stands up in disbelief and screams, "Walk with pr-r-ride man! Walk with pr-r-ride!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two little boys go into the grocery store. One is nine, one is four. The nine-year-old grabs a box of tampons from the shelf and carries it to the register for check-out. The cashier asks "Oh, these must be for your mom, huh?" The nine-year-old replies, "Nope, not for my mom." Without thinking, the cashier responded, "Well, they must be for your sister then?" The nine-year-old responded, "Nope, not for my sister either." The cashier had now become curious. "Oh. Not for your mom and not for your sister -- then who are they for?" The nine-year old says "They''re for my four-year-old little brother." The cashier is surprised: "Your four year-old-brother?" The nine-year-old explains: "Well yeah, they say on TV if you wear one of these, you can swim or ride a bike -- and my little brother can''t do either of those things."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young, beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling like expensive perfume. She turns to an old woman and says arrogantly, "Giorgio Beverly Hills, $100 an ounce!" Another young, beautiful woman gets onto the elevator and also smells of very expensive perfume. She arrogantly turns to the old woman and says, "Chanel No. 5, $150 dollars an ounce!" About three floors later, the old woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, she looks both of the women in the eyes, farts, and says, "Broccoli, 49 cents a pound!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee. On his first day, he dialed the kitchen and shouted into the phone: "Get me an fucking cup of coffee, quickly!" The voice from the other side responded, "You fool, you''ve dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you''re talking to?" "No," replied the trainee. "It''s the Managing Director of the company, idiot!" The trainee shouted back, "And do you know who YOU are fucking talking to, you idiot?" "No!" replied the Managing Director indignantly. "Thanks for that!" replied the trainee and put down the phone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys walked into a bar... you would have thought the second one would have ducked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows were standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don''t believe you," said Dolly. "It''s true, straight up, no bull!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says "Dam".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The darkest hours come just before the dawn. So if you''re going to steal your neighbour''s milk and newspaper, that''s the time to do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, no-one is listening until you fart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first you don''t succeed ... avoid skydiving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day... Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blind deer? No idea (no eye deer.) What do you call a blind deer with no legs? Still no idea! (not moving [still] no eye deer)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A duck walked into a store one day and asked the clerk, "Do you have any grapes?" The clerk said, "No." So the duck walked out and came back the next day and said, "You got any grapes?" and the clerk said, "No." So the duck walked out and came in next time and said, "You got any grapes?" and the clerk said, "No, and if you come in again and ask if we have any grapes, I''ll staple your feet to the floor." So the duck walked out and came in again and said, "You got any staples?" the clerk said, "No..." so the duck said, "You got any grapes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma''s so ugly, she''s not bald, it''s her hair running away from her face!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The gap between your teeth is so big, I don''t know whether to smile back or kick a field goal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are so stupid, you took a ruler with you to bed to see how long you slept!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so big, she had to call Sherwin-Williams to paint her toenails!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Anita. Anita who? Anita really warm place to sleep tonight, it''s cold out here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat, when you sit around the house, you really sit around the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Your dog rides in your truck more than your wife. 2. You wear specific hats to farm sales, livestock auctions, customer appreciation suppers, and vacations. 3. You have ever had to wash off in the backyard with a garden hose before your wife would let you in the house. 4. You''ve never thrown away a 5-gallon bucket. 5. You can remember the fertilizer rate, seed population, herbicide rate and yields on a farm you rented 10 years ago, but cannot recall your wife''s birthday. 6. You have used a velvet leaf plant as toilet paper. 7. You have driven off the road while examining your neighbors crops. 8. You have borrowed gravel from the county road to fill potholes in your driveway. 9. You have buried a dog and cried like a baby. 10. You''ve used the same knife to make bull calves steers and peel apples.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 32 rednecks in a room? A full set of teeth!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there were two men walking down a dirt path. One of them had a big potato sack over his shoulder. The other decided to ask what was in the sack. When he asked, the man said, "I got me some chickens for dinner tonight. Mmm Mmm Mmm... Chicken sure sounds good tonight." The other one wanted to know how many chickens were in the sack. "Well, I''ll tell you," replied the man, "If you can guess how many chickens I''ve got in this here sack I''ll give them both to you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know that the toothbrush was invented by a redneck? If it was invented by anyone else they would have called it a "teethbrush".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office and sees The President whooping and hollering. "What''s the matter, Mr. President?" the Vice President inquired. "Nothing at all, boss. I just done finished a jigsaw puzzle in record time!" the President beamed. "How long did it take you?" "Well, the box said ''3 to 5 Years'' but I did it in a month!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A squad of American soldiers was patrolling the Iraqi border, when they came across a badly mangled dead body. As they got closer, they found it was an Iraqi soldier. A short distance up the road, they found a badly mangled American soldier in a ditch on the other side of the road, struggling to breathe. They ran to him, cradled his bruised head and asked him what had happened. "Well," he whispered, "I was walking down this road, armed to the teeth when I came across this heavily armed Iraqi border guard. I looked him right in the eye and shouted, ''Saddam Hussein is a moronic, deceitful, lying piece of trash!''" "He looked me right in the eye and shouted back, ''George W. Bush is a moronic, deceitful, lying piece of trash too!''" "We were standing there shaking hands when the truck hit us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton died and went to Heaven. St. Peter was giving her a tour of Heaven when she noticed that there were dozens of clocks on the wall. Each clock displayed a different time of day. When she asked St. Peter about the clocks, he replied, "We have a clock for each person on earth and every time they tell a lie the hands move. The clock ticks off one second each time a lie is told." Special attention was given to two clocks. The clock belonging to Mother Teresa has never moved, indicating that she never told a lie. The clock for Abraham Lincoln has only moved twice. He only told two lies in his life. Hillary asked "Where is Bill''s clock?" St. Peter replied,"Jesus has it in his office... he''s using it as a ceiling fan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?" The little boy nodded in the affirmative. "Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together as a team?" The little boy nodded yes. "So," the coach continued, "when a strike is called, or you''re out at first, you don''t argue or curse or attack the umpire. Do you understand all that?" Again the little boy nodded. "Good," said the coach, "now go over there and explain it to your mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a class on abnormal psychology, the instructor was about to introduce the subject of manic depression. The instructor asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth, screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?" A young man in the rear raised his hand and suggested earnestly, "A basketball coach?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('G. W. Bush was very depressed that people were saying he is stupid. So he calls his good friend Queen Elizabeth, who says, "Now George, what you need to do is to surround yourself with smart people. Let me show you." She conference calls Tony Blair in and asks, "Tony, your parents had a baby. It isn''t your sister and it isn''t your brother. Who is it?" Tony Blair replies, "It''s me!" and hangs up. G.W. Bush then calls Dick Cheney and says, "Dick, your parents had a baby. It isn''t your sister and it isn''t your brother. Who is it?" And Cheney says, "Wow, that''s a tough one. Let me get back to you." So Cheney calls Colin Powell and says, "Colin, your parents had a baby. It isn''t your sister and it isn''t your brother. Who is it?" And Colin Powell says, "It''s me!" So Cheney calls Bush and says, "It''s Colin Powell." And Bush says, "No, you idiot! It''s Tony Blair!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did ya hear I got married? "Oh, that''s good." "No, that''s bad! She''s ugly!" "Oh, that''s bad." "No, that''s good! She''s rich." "Oh, that''s good!" "No, that''s bad! She won''t give me a cent." "Oh, that''s bad." "No, that''s good! She bought me servants and a big house" "Oh, that''s good." "No, that''s bad! The house burnt down." "Oh, that''s bad." "No, that''s good! She was in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions.... Officer: What''s 2+2? Blonde: Ummmmm... 4! Officer: What''s the square root of 100? Blonde: Ummmm... 10! Officer: Good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln? Blonde: Ummmm... I dunno. Officer: Well, you can go home and think about it. Come back tomorrow. The blonde goes home and calls up one of her friends, who asks her if she got the job. The blonde says, excitedly, "Not only did I get the job, I''m already working on a murder case!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A programmer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I''ll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The programmer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I''ll stay with you and do anything you want." Again the programmer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I''ve told you I''m a beautiful princess that I''ll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won''t you kiss me?" The programmer said, "Look, I''m a programmer. I don''t have time for a girlfriend -- but a talking frog, now that''s cool."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A southern minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great expression he said, ''''If I had all the beer in the world, I''d take it and pour it into the river.'''' With even greater emphasis he said, ''''And if I had all the wine in the world, I''d take it and pour it into the river.'''' And then finally, he said, ''''And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I''d take it and pour it into the river.'''' Sermon complete, he then sat down. The song leader stood very cautiously and announced, "And today we will let someone in the crowd pick our closing song." A Alabama man raised his hand and said, "Fer are closin song, we gonna sing dat one Hymn #365: ''Shall We Gather at the River.''''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday a pastor asked his congregation to consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns. After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed that someone had contributed a $1,000 bill. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation, and said he''d like to personally thank the person who had placed the money in the plate. A very quiet, elderly, saintly widow shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front. Slowly she made her way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much and asked her to pick out three hymns. Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the three handsomest men in the building and said, "I''ll take him and him and him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw a guy eating grass He told the driver to stop. He got out and asked him, "Why are you eating grass". The man replied, "I''m so poor, I can''t afford a thing to eat." So the laywer said, "Poor guy, come back to my house." The guys then said, "But I have a wife and three kids." The layers told him to bring them along. When they were all in the car, the poor man said, "Thanks for taking us back to your house, it is so kind of you." The laywer said, "You''re going to love it there, the grass is a foot tall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineer died and ended up in Hell. He was not pleased with the level of comfort in Hell, and began to redesign and build improvements. After a while, they had toilets that flush, air conditioning, and escalators. Everyone grew very fond of him. One day God called to Satan to mock him, "So, how''s it going down there in Hell?" Satan replied, "Hey, things are great. We''ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there''s no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." God was surprised, "What? You''ve got an engineer? That''s a mistake. He should never have gone down there in the first place. Send him back up here." "No way," replied Satan. "I like having an engineer, and I''m keeping him." God threatened, "Send him back up here now or I''ll sue!" Satan laughed and answered, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? interrupting cow interrupting co--- MOO', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly she went into a haunted house and came out with a job application.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she got hit by a parked car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly, just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her dad said, "Yeah! Let''s go bury it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly, two guys broke into her apt., she yelled "rape", they yelled "NO!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly, I took her to the zoo, and the zookeeper said "I didn''t know an animal had escaped."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde got a dent in her car and took it in to the mechanic. The mechanic, noticing that the woman was a blonde, decided to have some fun. So he told her all she had to do was take it home and blow in the tailpipe until the dent popped itself out. After 15 minutes of this, the blonde''s blonde friend came over and asked what she was doing. "I''m trying to pop out this dent, but it''s not really working." "Duh. You have to roll up the windows first!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a nightly stroll a blonde came across an office building. A sign said, "Press bell for Watchman." She presses it and hears an old man coming down the stairs. He turns on the light, unlocks the gate, and shuts off the security system. When he asked what the blonde wanted, she replied, "Why can''t you press that button for yourself?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde inventions: Waterproof towel Unbreakable egg Submarine screen door Solar powered flash light Helicopter ejection seat Inflatable dart board Pedal powered wheel chairs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the skeleton of a blonde you find in a closet? 1950''s Hide-n-seek champion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 blondes are walking in the park and the 1st blonde says, "LOOK! Dead bird!" The 2nd blonde looks up into the sky and yells "Where?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a blonde doing if her hands are covered tightly over her ears and her mouth is completely shut? She''s trying to hold onto a thought.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you never ask a blonde to make ice cubes for you? She''ll never remember the recipe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde was in a store, and saw a sign advertising a huge TV sale. She goes up to the salesman, and points to a shelf and says, "I want to buy that TV." The man says "No." The blonde, assuming its because he hates blondes, goes home and dyes her hair brown. She goes back to the store and asks again, only to again be told again, "No." She goes home dies her hair black, and returns yet again. She asks for the TV, and is told "No, go home you blonde!" So she finally snaps and cries, "I''ve died my hair twice!How the hell do you know I''m blonde?" The salesman replies, "That''s a microwave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she''s pregnant. What will be her response? "Is it mine?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the first blonde president move out of the oval office? She couldn''t find a corner to put her stuff in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so ugly when she walks through the woods during hunting season she wears a sign saying "DONT SHOOT! FROM THE FRONT I LOOK ALMOST HUMAN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde steal a parked police car? She saw "911" and thought it was a Porsche. (Porsche 911)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went into a local salon for a haircut. She was wearing a pair of headphones and she refused to take them off. The hairdresser tried to slip them off to cut her hair but the blonde just screamed "NO, DONT DO IT!" In a few minutes the blonde fell asleep from all the thinking she had to do to pick out a hairstyle. The hairdresser takes off the headphones and in a few minutes the blonde dies. The hairdresser, shocked, then hears the headphones. It was repeating the words "Inhale... exhale.... inhale..... exhale...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell a blondes been using your computer? There''s whiteout on the screen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a drug store and asks the pharmacist if he can give him something for the hiccups. The pharmacist promptly reaches down, pulls out a knife, and lunges at the man. The man backs away and yells "WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?" "Well, you don''t have the hiccups anymore do you?" replies the pharmacist. The man says, "No I don''t, you jerk; but my wife out in the car still does!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adam was in the Garden of Eden and was very very lonely. So God decides to build him a friend and lover. He decides to call it a "Woman". So he sets out to work but realizes he''ll need to borrow a few parts from Adam, so he goes to Adam and explains the situation. God says "I''ll build the perfect companion, she''ll cook, clean, take care of your every wish and need and will never nag or complain or be angry at you for no reason. It''ll only cost you an arm and a leg." Adam says "But I need my arm and leg... what can I get for just a rib?" And the rest is history...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly when you go outside your arrested for indecent exposure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so poor I saw her kicking a cardboard box down the street and when I asked her what she was doing she said "Moving!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many little brothers does it take to change a light bulb? Three- one to hold onto the bulb and two to turn the ladder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two- One to screw in the idea, and one to give it a suprising twist at the end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many boy scouts does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three- Each to do one good turn daily.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so fat, she didn''t have a birth certificate, she had a blueprint!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, she sells shade, and that gives her enough to feed a family!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so poor, I blew my nose, and she said, "Lord thank us, we have food!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Halloween, a boy dressed up as a cowboy. He went to a house, and an elderly lady opened the door. She said, "What might you be?" and the kid in front of the boy said, "I''m an Indian! All day, I hunt buffalo and make teepees and wigwams!" and the lady gave him some candy. Then the boy was up in line. The elderly lady said, "What might you be?" and he replied, "I''m a cowboy! All day, I round up cattle and take them to corrals!" The lady gave him some candy. So he went to the next house, and a scorching hot teenage girl opened the door. She said, "What might you be?" and the girl in front of the boy said, "I''m a lesbian. All day I think of women, all afternoon I think of women, and all night I think of women." The teenage girl gave her some candy, and next the boy was up. The teenage girl said, "What might you be?" The boy looked her up and down, and said, "Well, I thought I was a cowboy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, on her first date, a blond went to an amusement park with her boyfriend. After they went on the roundabout, the boy said, "What do you want to do next?" The girl said, "I want to be weighed." So he weighed the blond on a guess the weight game. Then they went on the roller coaster, and afterwards the boy said, "What do you want to do next?" The girl said, "I want to be weighed." So he weighed the blond again, and she weighed the same, so he took her home. When she got home, she flumped on the couch and her mother said, "How was the date?" The blond said, "Weewy Weewy Wousy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is a computer like an air conditioner? When you open Windows it won''t work!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he''s doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he''s going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I''ve heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person''s hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It''s guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!" The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I''m talking to that little jerk on your knee!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('20. The hole closed on him before he could penetrate it. 19. He came at his blind side and got him from behind. 18. He''s off to the sidelines for a quick blow. 17. It''s a game of inches. 16. That hole was so big, you could drive a truck through it. 15. When you get down in this area, you just gotta start pounding. 14. He''s gonna feel that one tomorrow. 13. He found his tight end. 12. End around. 11. He had to stretch to get it in. 10. He gets penetration in the backfield. 9. He blows them off (at the line). 8. He bangs it in. 7. He could go all the way. 6. He gets it off just in time. 5. He goes deep. 4. He found a hole and slid through it. 3. He pounds it in. 2. He beats them off (the line) 1. He''s got great hands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why is it so hard to replace Vanna White? A: They can''t find another blonde who knows the whole alphabet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the definition of bravery? A man with diarrhea chancing a fart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does santa greet the three blonde sisters? Ho. Ho. Ho.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You were so ugly as a baby you were the poster child on the birth control posters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re on a plane going to California and you''re stuck in an aisle seat how do you trick a blonde into giving you her window seat? Tell her only the aisle seats are going to California.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are New Yorkers always depressed? Because the light at the end of the tunnel is New Jersey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and a drunk is sitting there mumbling something quietly. Curious the man takes the seat next to him. The drunk is mumbling, "Looks like plastic, feels like rubber." While looking at something in his hand. The man asks the drunk if he may see what he means. The man feels the object and says, "It does look like plastic and feels like rubber. Where did you get it?" The drunk replies, "From my nose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so dumb she took a spoon to the Superbowl!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so stupid, it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The day before Christmas break, a few kindergarten students decided to give their teacher a gift. The first gift was from a little girl whos daddy was a florist. The teacher takes the present unwraps it and discovers it''s flowers. She thanks the girl and takes the next present. Its from a little boy whose daddy own a candy store. She unwraps the present and sure enough there''s a box of chocolates. She thanks the boy and takes the last gift. The last gift is from a boy whose daddy owns a liquor store. The gift is dripping with a weird liquid. Shocked that the boy''s father would give him alcohol to give to a teacher, decides to say nothing and guess what it is. "Is it champagne?" The boy replies "No." "Is it wine?" The boy again replies "Nope." The teacher gives up and asks what it is. The excited boy yells, "ITS A PUPPY!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little blind rabbit and a little blind snake met each other in the woods one day and, as neither of them could see what species they were so they decided to feel each other and then describe each other so that the rabbit would know what kind of animal he was and the snake would also know what species he was. The snake ran his tongue over the rabbit. "Why, you are fluffy and soft and have a wet nose," the snake said; "you must be a rabbit." The rabbit then ran his paws over the length of the snake and said, "Well, you are cold, slimy, scaly and hard .... you must be a lawyer!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman are having an intimate dinner in a restaurant when their waitress, standing a few tables away, watches as the man quietly slides all the way down his chair and out of sight. The woman across from him seems to not notice.The waitress comes over and says, "Excuse me, Ma''am, but I think your husband just slid under the table." The woman says, "No he didn''t, he just walked in the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so old and fat when God said let there be light, he asked your momma to move the hell out of the way because she was blocking the sun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde came home from work early and when she walked into her house, she saw her husband in bed with another woman. She pulls her gun out of her purse and points it to her head. Her husband screams, "NO DON''T DO IT! I''m sorry!" To which the blonde replies "SHUT UP! You''re next!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette and a redhead all work together in an office building. Their female boss always leaves work early. So one day the brunette says, "Lets skip out early today. No one will notice." So they all leave work early. The brunette goes to a movie, and the redhead goes to a few bars. The blonde though wanted to go home and have sex with her husband. She arrives home and goes into her bedroom where her husband and her boss are having sex. The blonde quietly slips out the door and runs from her house. The next day when the brunette suggested they skip work again the blonde replied, "No way! I almost got caught yesterday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Someone too short to ring the doorbell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college student sent the following letter to her parents: Hi Parent$! Today i$ $eptember 15. I''m doing $uperb in $chool (or, $hould I $ay, college). The teacher$ are great, my roommate$ are great, and I''m having a $uper time! All I could u$e right now is a little ca$h. To which the parents responded: Hi daughter! NOthing happening on this end. Something''s wrong, because you kNOw, we got this letter in NOvember. I am NOt worrying about anything down here, kNOck on wood huh? Your loving parents, NOrden and Morden Finkelstein.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two buzzards were eating a dead clown. One said to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so dumb, she had you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politics comes from the root "poli-", which means many, and "-tics", which means, blood-sucking creatures.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they have braille on drive-thru ATMs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can women put mascara on with their mouth closed?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok, 3 canadians were walking along the beach, one from the Yukon, one from Quebec, and one from Newfoundland. Now, it happened that they found a magic lamp. After rubbing it, the genie promised each of them one wish. The Yukon said, "I wish for fish teeming in our waters for a million years." The genie snapped his fingers and said, "Done." The Yukon man went off to go fish. Now the Quebec man said, "Being as the Quebecois''s (is that right?) are a superior race, I want a wall a mile high and a mile thick all the way around Quebec so no one can get in, and no one can get out. So the genie snapped his fingers, and transported the Quebecois to Quebec so there were no problems. The Newfie stepped up and said, "Ok, it''s a mile high and a mile thick, and no one can get in or out right?" "Correct." said the genie. "Fill it with water."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eagles may soar, but weasels don''t get sucked into jet engines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I drive way too fast to worry about my cholesterol.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Success is relative. The more success, the more relatives!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When everything is coming your way, you''re on the wrong side of the freeway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Laundromat sign: Automatic Washing Machines: Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign at an office: Would the person who removed the step ladder yesterday kindly bring it back or further steps will be taken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign at an office kitchen: After the tea break, the staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the drain-board.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('antique-an item your grandparents bought, your parents got rid of, and you''re buying again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack told me you told him that I told you that he was ugly, and I told you not to tell him I told you that! It''s his fault! I told him not to tell you I told him what you told me! Well, don''t let it happen again--and don''t tell him I told you he told me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good way to save face is to keep the lower half shut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Silence is golden, because you never have to explain something you didn''t say.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m such an insomniac, the sheep fall asleep before I do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, when she walks by the television set you miss three episodes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know the day I gave up exercise. You wanna know? Check my birth certificate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so fat when she wears high heels 2 hours later they''re flip flops.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mom is so fat she rolled over a SuperNintendo and made 4 Game Boys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom is so fat her picture fell down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mom is so fat, she''s the only one at the beach that gets a tan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she had a dream of marshmallows, and when she woke up, her pillows were gone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so fat she uses pillows for pantyliners Your momma so fat she got stuck in the Grand Canyon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so ugly when she walked through the graveyard 2 men came after her with shovels.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat when she sat on a rainbow skittles came out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so fat when she broke a leg gravy came out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so ugly when she went to the horse track people started placing bets on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk guy stumbles into the bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "No way, you''ve had enough." So the drunk leaves. The drunk then enters the bar from the rear door and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender refuses and asks the drunk to leave. The drunk comes back into the bar through the front door and asks for a drink. The bartender says, "Listen, I''m not giving you a damn drink, you''re already drunk enough." The drunk says, "DAMN, MAN! How many bars do you work at?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into the bar and orders a round of beer for everyone. He even tells the bartender to pour himself one. So the bartender gives everyone the round and pours one for himself. He asks the man to pay, but the man says he has no money. The bartender is pissed so he beats up the man pretty bad then throws him out. The next day the same man walks back in and orders a round of beer for everyone and even tells the bartender to give himself one. The bartender thinks the man isn''t stupid enough to do the same thing twice, so he does it and asks the man to pay. So the man says again he has no money. Again the man is beat up and thrown out. The next day the man comes back in and tells the bartender to give a round of beers to everyone. The bartender replies in an angry voice, "What? No beer for me this time?" The man says, "No way man, you''re violent when you drink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 cops are sitting in their car outside of a local bar. They were waiting to see if anyone would drive home drunk. A guy stumbles out, obviously drunk out of his mind. He falls down flat on his face. 5 bar patrons leave the bar. The cops don''t care about the other patrons, they are just waiting for him to start up his car. He falls again on his face. 5 more patrons leave the bar. Finally the drunk stumbles to his car door and opens it up and sits inside. 6 patrons leave the bar. Finally the drunk starts up his car but before he could move the cops are on him sticking a breathalyzer in his face. He takes the test and passes with blood alcohol level of 0.00. The cops are pissed and asked him what the hell he was doing. The drunk replies, "I''m the designated decoy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk is out drinking and he gets really wasted. He looks at the time and it''s 3 a.m. He screams and heads home before his wife screams at him. He tries to walk but he can''t. His legs won''t work. Figuring he''s too drunk to walk home he crawls. It was long and hard but he makes it home in a half hour. He silently crawls into bed and his wife is still sound asleep. He relaxes and lays back. Then his wife whispers, "I know you''ve been out drinking and right now your wasted." The man whispers, "No I haven''t, and no I''m not." The woman replies, "Then where''s your wheelchair?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into the bar and orders a scotch. He gulps it down, and looks in his hand. He orders another one. He gulps it down and orders another one. He again looks in his hand. He orders 2 scotches this time and gulps them both down. He looks in his hand. The bartender, curious, asks the man what''s going on. The man replies, "It''s a picture of my wife. When she starts to look good, I''m going home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Several elderly nuns were in their second floor convent one night when a fire broke out. They took their habits off, tied them together to make a rope, and climbed out the window. After they were safely on the ground and out of the building, a news reporter came over to one of the nuns and said to her, "Weren''t you afraid that the habits could have ripped or broken since they are old?" The nun replied, "Nah, don''t you know old habits are hard to break?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A burglar had just broken into a house and was stealing anything he could get his hands on. Then he heard a voice. It said, "Jesus is watching you." Thinking its in his head he continues on his business. Then he hears it again, "Jesus is watching you." The burglar not very religious but still scared says, "Who are you?" Then he flipped on the light not caring if he was caught by the house owners. All he sees is a parrot in the corner. The parrot then says, "Jesus is watching you." The burglar asks the parrot his name. The parrot replied, "Satan." The burglar laughs and says, "Who would name their parrot Satan?" The parrot says, "Same person who would name their rottweiler Jesus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walked in a library and went to the librarian, pulls out a thick book and started screaming at her. She yells, "THIS BOOK IS HORRIBLE! THERE ARE TOO MANY CHARACTERS AND NO PLOT WHATSOEVER!" The librarian stares at her, then calmly replies, "So you''re the one who took our phone book."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a redneck and his redneck wife. The wife didn''t want another child, and asked the redneck husband to get surgery so he can''t impregnate his wife. The redneck goes to a very expensive doctor. The doctor who is in a hurry and is sure the redneck can''t pay for his operation, just hands the redneck a firecracker and says, "Light this, hold it, count to 10." The redneck is confused but the doctor seems to know what he''s doing. The redneck goes home and lights the firecracker. He starts counting with the aid of his fingers... "1...2...3...4...5..." The redneck pauses, puts the firecracker between his legs and resumes counting on the other hand....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are in the woods camping out when a bear attacks them. While the bear sniffs around the food, the first guy starts lacing up his sneakers. The second guys goes, "Are you crazy? You can''t outrun a bear!" The first guy replies, "I dont need to; I only have to outrun you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat that the local restaurant says :Maximum occupancy 115 people or yo mama.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat that when she ran away they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror her reflection ducks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so fat that when she layed on the beach, four guys from greenpeace tried to throw her back in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is said that "it is always in the last place you look" Well of course! Are there some people out there who keep looking after they find it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a boomerang that doesn''t work? A stick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse walked into a bar. The barman said, "Why the long face?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender says, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?" The guy says, "You would be drinking fast if you had what I have." The bartender says, "What do you have?" The guy says, "75 cents."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TO: Boss FROM: Blondie RE: Changing Calendars from Y2K I hope that I haven''t misunderstood your instructions because, to be honest, none of this Y to K problem made much sense to me. At any rate, I have finished the conversion of all of the months on all of the company calendars for next year. The calendars have returned from the printer and are ready to be distributed with the following new months: Januark Februark Mak Julk I also changed all the days of each week to: Sundak Mondak Tuesdak Wednesdak Thursdak Fridak Saturdak We are now Y to K compliant. Have a nice dak!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four guys are drinking in a bar, bragging about their sons. "My son," the first one says, "started out washing cars at dealership, but now owns the dealership and just gave one of his friends four new cars of his choice!" "My son," said the second, "started out serving lunch in a real estate office, but now owns the real estate office and just gave one of his friends a new mansion!" "My son," said the third, "started out sweeping the floors at the Stock Exchange, but now practically owns the Stock Exchange and just gave one of his friends a $1,000,000 in stock." "Well," the fourth guy said, "my son''s turned out to be a bit of a disappointment. He''s a gay hairdresser and he has SEVERAL boyfriends. On the plus side, between them, they gave him four cars, a mansion, and a million dollars in stock for his birthday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a secretary is leaving on her lunch break, and she notices her boss standing in front of a shredder with a clueless look on his face. The secretary walks up to him and asks if he needs help. "Yes!" he says looking and sounding relieved, "This is very important." Glad to help, she turns the shredder on and inserts the paper. Then her boss says, "Thanks, I only need one copy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. Who''s there? Dwayne Dwayne who? Dwayne the bathtub mommy, I''m dwowning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Dad said to yo mama, "We''re getting a color TV!" and yo mama asked, "What color?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom is so stupid, when the doctor told her she had to take a pregnancy test, she asked how long she had to study', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid she waited at a Stop sign until it said Go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid she stole a free sample.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid she couldn''t even pass a blood test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid she thinks these jokes are funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she got locked in McDonalds, and lost 300 pounds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so poor, I walked in and dropped a cigarette butt on the floor, and she said, "Clap your hands and stomp your feet, praise the Lord, we got heat".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she put a free sample on layaway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so poor that when I walked in the front door, I tripped over the back gate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual headline: "Include Your Children When Baking Cookies"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual headline: "Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual headline: Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual headline: Deer Kill 17,000', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands. This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver''s license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend or significant other. DANGEROUS: What''s for dinner? SAFER: Can I help you with dinner? SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner? DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT? SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown. SAFEST: Wow! Look at you! DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about? SAFER: Could we be overreacting? SAFEST: Here''s fifty dollars. DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that? SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left. SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that? DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day? SAFER: I hope you didn''t overdo it today. SAFEST: I''ve always loved you in that robe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde has just inherited a Ranch but only had two horses. The problem was she couldn''t tell them apart. So she goes to her neighbor rancher and asks for help. He suggests cutting ones tail a bit shorter then the other. She does it but then a week later she comes back and tells the neighbor rancher that it grew back. So he tells her to tie a different colored string around one of the horses neck. She does it but a week later the tie slips off and she has to go back to the neighbor. So he suggest she paint a different color spot on each of the horses. She does and comes back a week later with cookies. She tells the neighbor rancher, "Here I baked these for you. Your plan worked perfectly. I painted a red spot on the black horse and a blue spot on the white horse."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a Rhino from charging? Take away its credit card.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many actors does it take to change a light bulb? Only one-they don''t like to share the spotlight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many aerobics instructors does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Five. Four to do it in perfect synchrony and one to stand there going "To the left, and to the left, and to the left, and to the left, and take it out, and put it down, and pick it up, and put it in, and to the right, and to the right, and to the right, and to the right..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many auto mechanics does it take to change a light bulb? A: Six - One to force it with a hammer and five to go out for more bulbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PARATROOPER A young army private is home on leave. He is talking to his dad about his experience at jump school while learning to be a paratrooper. "Dad" he says, "on my first jump, I froze up at the door on the plane. A big black sergeant standing behind me told me that if I didn''''t jump, he was gonna cram about 12 inches of dick up my ass." "Well did you jump?" asks his dad. "Just a little at first" answered the boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a short psychic on the lam? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A small medium at large!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you praise a computer? Say "Data Boy"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men, two brunettes and a blond, are being chased by a tiger through the jungle. They get to a river and have two choices: 1. Get across the river without being eaten by pirannhas or 2. Get eaten by the tiger. They spot a genie and the genie says I can grant you one wish.. The first blond man thinks "I wish I can get across safely." He swims across and makes it without a scratch. The second blond man says "I want to be even smarter than the first man." He climbed onto a raft and paddled across. The brunette thinks "I want to be the smartest of them all". Instantly, he turned into a woman, and she walked across a nearby bridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a cat dies and goes to heaven. God meets him at the gate and says,"You''ve been a good cat all of your life, anything you want is yours." The cat says"Well, I lived with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wood floor." Instantly, a fluffy pillow appears. The cat hops onto it and falls asleep. A week later, five mice die and go to heaven as well. God meets them at the gate and makes them the same offer. They reply "All of our life, we''ve been chased by cats, dogs, and women with brooms. If only we didn''t have to run anymore...." They are each fitted with a custom pair of roller skates. A month later, God decides to check up on the cat. He asks "How are you doing? Are you happy?" Kitty answers " Life here is SUPER! Oh, and by the way, those meals on wheels you''ve been sending over are the best!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor who works at the mental hospital wants to take his patients out to a baseball game seeing as they''re so well behaved. He goes to his colleagues and asks them if it''s ok. They don''t want to let him take them in case they misbehave or do something wrong seeing as they''re complete nutcases. But the doctor wants to show them that the patients are really good. So he brings them in and says, "Sit Nuts." And all the patients sit. He then says, "Stand Nuts." And all the patients stand. He then says "Talk Nuts." And they all start chatting. The other doctors are impressed and agree its ok. So they go to the stadium and the doctor leaves to go get snacks. When he comes back out everyone is running and screaming. He stops a guy and asks him what the heck is happening. The man replies, "The vendor came by and started yelling PEANUTS! and a bunch of people started pissing all over the place."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a shoe store and asks to try on a pair of shoes. They were a bit snug. "Well, they feel a bit tight," says the man. The salesman bends down and feels around. He suggests pulling the tongue out, then asks, "How do they feel now?" "Well, dey shtill feel a bit thight"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is sitting at his register and a beautiful young women comes in asking to use the bathroom. Even though she is beautiful the man refuses to let her use it. At least until she buys something. So she buys a pack of gum and then asks again. He says, "yes." She comes out a few minutes later, and in her most seductive voice starts talking to him, she slips her finger in his mouth and lets him lick it for awhile. After a while she pops her finger out of his mouth and says, "You''re out of toilet paper."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is at the gates of heaven, but his life was very borderline good and bad; so St. Peter decides to have a contest. He gives the choice of the man answering a question or asking a question. If the man cannot get the answer he''s asked or St. Peter can''t answer the question then the man gets into heaven. The man decides to ask. He takes a piece of paper, pokes 1000 holes in it, and puts it to his butt and farts. He then asks St. Peter, "Which hole did my fart come out of?" St. Peter replies, "That''s easy; this one," and he points to a hole. The man smiles and says, "Nope! It came out of this one!" and he points to his ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men, a French, Chinese, and American, decided to have a contest. They wanted to see whose dog could go the longest without going to the bathroom. The Chinese man won after a few hours. A news reporter asked him how he acheived such a feat. He replied, in a rather sing-song way, "Me Chinese, me no dumb, me stick rock up doggie''s bum!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was on a bridge as a news reporter walked by. She was told that if she didn''t cover another story in 2 hours, she''d be fired. All of a sudden, the man starts to count "1,2,.." "Wait!" interrupts the reporter. "What is it?" "What are you trying to do?" "I''m going to commit suicide." "May I join you?" "Certainly." The two shout "1,2..." They''re interrupted by a man walking down the street. "May I join you?" he asks. "Sure." "1,2..." As soon as the two men said 3, they jumped off, but the clever reporter stayed behind. "3,2,1, and cue!" "Good evening, I am just arriving at the scene of a crime. Two men just jumped off of this bridge."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A truck driver was driving down the highway when he saw a priest at the side of the road. He stopped to pick up the priest and give him a ride. A ways down the road the truck driver saw a lawyer on the side of the road. He turned the truck on a direct course with the lawyer. Then he thought ''Oh no, I have a priest in the truck. I can''t run down this lawyer!'' and at the last second the truck driver swerved to miss the lawyer. But, the truck driver heard a thump outside of the truck. He looked in his rear-view mirror but didn''t see anything. He turned to the priest and said ''Sorry Father, I just missed that lawyer at the side of the road.'' The priest said ''Don''t worry son, I got him with my door''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him "What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?" The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street." Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the record, and after a moment Gabriel affirmed that this was true. Saint Peter said, "Well, that''s fine, but it''s not really quite enough to get you into Heaven." The Lawyer said, "Wait Wait! There''s more! Three years ago I also gave a homeless person a quarter." Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who after a moment nodded back, affirming this, too, had been verified. Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we do with this fellow?" Gabriel gave the Lawyer a sidelong glance, then said to Saint Peter, "Let''s give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After successfully passing the bar exam, a young man opened his own law office. One day he was sitting idle at his desk when his secretary announced that a Mr. Jones had arrived to see him. "Show him right in!" the lawyer replied. As Mr. Jones was being ushered in the lawyer had an idea. He quickly picked up the phone and shouted into it "...and you tell them that we won''t accept less then fifty thousand dollars, and don''t even call me until you agree to that amount!" Slamming the phone down he stood up and greeted Mr. Jones, "Good morning, Mr. Jones, what can I do for you?" "I''m from the telphone company," Mr. Jones replied. "I''m here to connect that phone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why won''t sharks attack lawyers? A: Professional courtesy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? A: Not enough sand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What can a goose do, a duck can''t, and a lawyer should? A: Stick his bill up his rear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Boo! Boo who? Don''t cry it''s just a joke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two (think about it)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde are all about to be shot by a firing squad. The redhead goes out first and stands in front of them. Right before they shoot, the redhead screams, "Tornado!" The firing squad turns to look, and the redhead runs away. The brunette is up next, and decides it would be a good idea to to do the same thing that the redhead did. So, just as the firing squad is about to shoot, she screams, "Earthquake!" The firing squad looks around for a moment, distracted, giving the brunette just enough time to run away. Then the blonde comes up and decides to copy the redhead and the brunette. Just as the firing squad is about to shoot, the blonde screams, "Fire!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman are in a lamaze class, and the woman is 7 months pregnant. In this class, the lamaze instructor is trying to get the husbands to understand what their wives are going through. All the men put on fake bellies, and the lamaze instructor walks up to the first man and drops a pencil in front of him. "Okay, now pick up that pencil exactly as your wife would," says the lamaze instructor. The husband smiles slyly. "You want me to pick it up ''exactly'' how my wife would? He asks. "Yes, exactly how your wife would," the lamaze instructor repeats, impatiently. The man looks at his wife, and says, "Honey, pick up that pencil."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad news: A man fell out of an airplane Good news: He had a parachute Bad news: The parachute didn''t work Good news: There was a haystack beneath him Bad news: There was a pitchfork in the haystack Good news: He missed the pitchfork Bad news: He missed the haystack', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks up to the bartender in a bar and says, "I bet you twenty dollars I can pee into that cup over there." He points to a cup over the bar about 4 feet away. The bartender says sure, positive that the man can''t do it and he''s about to make 20 bucks. Sure enough, the man ends up peeing all over the bar, anywhere but in the cup. The bartender, laughing, collects twenty dollars. The man is still smiling. Curious, the bartender asks, "You just lost your bet. Why are you smiling?" "Well," said the man, "I just bet that man over there that I could pee all over your bar and you wouldn''t do anything but laugh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pig walks into a bar and asks for a glass of water. It drinks it, then asks where the bathroom is. The bartender points him in the right direction and pays no more attention to the pig. Another pig walks into the bar, orders two glasses of water. He drinks them and asks where the bathroom is. The bartender points him in the right direction and then turns his attention back to his work. A third pig walks in, orders five glasses of water, and drinks them all down. He gets up to leave and says goodbye to the bartender. "Wait," says the bartender, curious, "Aren''t you going to ask where the bathroom is?" "Nope," says the pig, "I''m the pig that goes wee wee wee all the way home." -Courtesy of my cousin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red Violets are blue I''m schizophrenic And so am I!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Alaska Department of Fish and Game recently issued this warning... "Warning: In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts, the Alaska Department of Fish and Game is advising hikers, hunters and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert of bears while in the field. We advise outdoorsmen to wear noisy little bells on their clothing, so as not to startle bears that aren''t expecting them. We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear. It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity. Outdoorsmen should recognise the difference between black bear and grizzly bear manure: Black bear manure is smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur. Grizzly bear manure has little bells in it and smells like pepper."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children were called upon in a classroom to make sentences with words chosen by the teacher. The teacher smiled when Jack raised his hand to participate. She gave him the words ''defeat'', ''deduct'', ''defence'' and ''detail''. Jack stood seriously for a while with all eyes focused on him awaiting his reply. "Defeat of Deduct went over defence before detail!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat, she went to buy a water bed and they put a blanket over the Altantic Ocean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are out driving, and the brunette tells the blonde to look out for cops - especially cops with their lights on. After they''ve been driving for a while, the brunette asks the blonde if she''s seen any cops. "Yes," says the blonde. "Are their lights on?" The blonde has to think for a moment, then says, "Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blonds decided to go shopping. A few hours later they come out and the first blond realizes that she has locked her keys in the car, so they spent a few hours pacing around the car trying to figure out what to do. Finally, the first blond looks off into the distance and sees storm clouds. She turns to her friend and says, "Quick, think of something because a storm is coming and I left the convertible top open!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar with his dog on a leash the barman says, "Geez that''s a weird dog; he''s stumpy-legged, pink, and doesn''t have a tail, but I bet my rottweiler would beat the heck out of it." 50 bucks is laid down. Out in the yard the rottweiler gets mauled to pieces. Another drinker says his pit bull will win, but the bet is 100 bucks. Another trip to the yard and when it''s finished there are bits of pit-bull terrier all over the place. The drinker pays up and asks, "Say what breed is that anyway?" The owner says, "Until I cut his tail off and painted it pink it was the same breed as every other alligator."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Looking in the mall for a nightgown, I tried my luck in a store known for its sexy lingerie. To my delight, however, I found just what I was looking for. Waiting in the line to pay, I noticed a young woman behind me holding the same item. This confirmed what I suspected all along: despite being over 50, I still have a very "with it" attitude. "I see we have the same taste," I said proudly to the 20- something behind me. "Yes," she replied. "I''m getting this for my grandmother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was teaching my 6-year-old daughter how to unbuckle her seat belt. She asked, "Do I click the square?" I said yes. She then asked me, "Single click or double click?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, an old man went to a teenager with spiked hair. He asked him, "Have you done anything crazy in your life?" The teen replied, "No". So the old man said, "Well, about 15 years ago, I was drunk, and I saw a porcupine. Now I am wondering if you are my son."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a teen went to the docter, and said: "DOCTOR! Whenever I go to the bathroom, nickels come out!" The docter replies, "Drink lots of water, and keep your feet elevated." The next week, the teen comes back and says that dimes come out. The doctor says the same thing. Next week, he says that quarters are coming. Then half dollars. The doctor finally replies, "You''re at the time where you go through change."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Eve was first created, she had 3 breasts. She asks God, "What shall I do with this extra breast?" And God created Adam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald MacDonald from the Isle of Skye went to study at an English university and was living in the hall of residence with all the other students there. After he had been there a month, his mother came to visit him. "And how do you find the English students, Donald?" she asked. "Mother," he replied,"they''re such terrible, noisy people. The one on that side keeps banging his head on the wall and won''t stop. The one on the other side screams and screams all night." "Oh Donald! How do you manage to put up with these awful noisy English neighbors?" "Mother, I do nothing. I just ignore them. I just stay here quietly, playing my bagpipes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And will there be anything else, sir? the bellboy asked after setting out an elaborate dinner for two. "No, thank you," the gentleman replied. "That will be all." As the young man turned to leave, he noticed a beautiful satin negligee on the bed. "Anything for your wife?" he asked. "Yeah! That''s a good idea," the fellow said... "Please bring up a postcard. I''ll mail her a note!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other the woman leans out the window and yells, "PIG!!" The man immediately leans out his window and replies, "BITCH!!" They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet. After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, "Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?" The third fellow says, "I''ll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees." The first two guys were amazed. "Wow! What happened then?" they asked. The third man took a healthy swallow of his beer, sighed and uttered, "She said, ''Get out from under the bed and fight like a man.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hotdog walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender replies, "Sorry, we don''t serve food here".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are the blonde''s boobs square? She forgot to take the tissues out of the box!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if a dummy has been sending e-mail? You see a bunch of envelopes stuffed into the disk drive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do a blond''s braincells die? Alone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many law professors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge asks a defendant to stand. "You are charged with murdering a school teacher with a chain saw." From out of the audience a man shouts "You lying maggot!" "Silence in the court!" the judge shouted back. He turns to the defendant again and says, "You are also charged with killing a paperboy with a shovel." "You Goddamned tightwad!" blurted the spectator. "Quiet!" yelled the judge. "You are also charged with killing a mailman with an electric drill." "You cheap son of a..." the man starts to shout when the judge thunders back "If you don''t tell me the reason for your outbursts right now, I will hold you in contempt!" "I''ve lived next to that lying maggot for ten years now, but do you think he ever had a f*****g tool when I needed to borrow one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every Sunday 3 boys would go to church and confess. So the first boy went up to the priest. The priest says "What have you done bad in your life son". The boy responds with "I''ve swore to my mother." The priest says,"Take one sip of holy water." The second boys goes up to the priest and the priest asks, "What have you done bad in your life son?" The boy responds with, "I''ve stolen something". The priest says "Take two sips of holy water." After every sip the third boy is laughing his head off. So the third boy goes up to the priest and the priest says, "What have you done bad in your life son" The boy responds with, "I peed in the holy water."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursdays at 7:30 to 8:30, Please use the back door. Weight Watchers will meet at 7 p.m. Please use large double doors at the side entrance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb that when she got locked in the grocery store she starved to death!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama stinks so bad that when she puts on her ''Secret'' deodorant it tells! ha ha :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahead of him in line to see St. Peter. To his surprise, St. Peter left his desk at the gate and came down the long line to where the laywer was, and greeted him warmly. Then St. Peter and one of his assistants took the lawyer by the hands and guided him up to the front of the line, and into a comfortable chair by his desk. The lawyer said, "I don''t mind all this attention, but what makes me so special?" St. Peter replied, "Well, I''ve added up all the hours for which you billed your clients, and by my calculation you must be about 193 years old!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bumper sticker on your car reads: "What Would Dawson Do?" In the middle of an exam, you tell the professor you want to use a lifeline. You need to be tranquilized when the cable goes out. In the late evening, you look forward to sitting back and catching the latest informercial. If you''re a witness to an argument, you instinctually shout, "Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Jer-ry!" You try to impress the opposite sex by saying, "Hey, I get 120 channels!" Your entire CD collection consists of "Greatest Hits" albums by the decade. You have a gold-plated "clicker." Your intellectual discussions all stem from The Discovery Channel. After 15 minutes of work, you need a two-minute break.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three friends die and go to heaven. The first guy gets handcuffed to one of the ugliest girls there. ''''Why?'''' he asks. St. Paul replies, ''''When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.'''' The same happens to the second guy. He asks why. St. Paul replies, ''''When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.'''' The third guy laughs at his friends and says, ''''Thank God I didn''t do anything like that.'''' He gets handcuffed to the prettiest girl in heaven. The other two guys ask, ''''Why?'''' ''''Because when she was nine she killed a bird with a stone.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Your dog rather rub up against the wall than have you pet it. 2. All the numbers in your little black book start with "1-900." 3. Due to excessive hazing and ridicule, you decided to drop out of the Origami Club. 4. You were almost involved in a threesome, but your left hand fell asleep. 5. Fantasizing out loud before falling asleep is your idea of "pillow talk." 6. Your personal ad reads: "Seeking Anybody." 7. Next to your name in the phone directory, the phone number is replaced with the phrase "Who cares?" 8. You look forward to the dinner time calls from telemarketers. 9. The last time you were invited to a party, you were grooving to the lyric, "Put your right foot in, take your right foot out." 10. You spent last summer following around the 2000 Bible Belt Trekkie Convention Tour.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy was in his room playing with himself, when his father walked in. "Son! If you masturbate too much, you''re gonna go blind!" "Dad," the boy said, "I''m over here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest wanted to convince a prostitute to turn respectable. So he met with her one day and began slowly warming up to her. "Oh, my child," he said, "your dress is most lovely." "Thank you, Father," she replied. The radio was playing and they danced a little as they talked. "Oh, my child," said the priest, "your conversation is most lovely." "Thank you, Father," said the prostitute. Finally, the priest sat her down and said, "Oh, my child, there is one thing I have against you." And the prostitute said, "Yes, I know, Father. I felt it while we were dancing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you get any under the tree? I think your balls are hanging too low. Check out Rudolph''s honker! Santa''s sack is really bulging. Lift up the skirt so I can get a whiff. Did you get a piece of the fruitcake? I love licking the end till it''s really sharp and pointy. From here you can''t tell if they''re artificial or real. Can I interest you in some dark meat? To get it to stand up straight, try propping it against the wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and it immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse''s mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse''s neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly ignorant of its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, the blonde attempts to leap away from the horse and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup, and she is now at the mercy of the horse''s pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over. She starts to lose consciousness, but to her great fortune, Bobby, the Wal-Mart greeter, sees her and unplugs the horse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was having sharp pains in her side. The doctor examined her and said, "You have acute appendicitis." The blonde yelled at the doctor, "I came here to get medical help, not get a stupid compliment!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish confessing to adultery. One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, "If I hear one more person confess to adultery, I''ll quit!" Well, everyone liked him, so they came up with a code word. Someone who had committed adultery would say instead that they had ''fallen.'' This seemed to satisfy the old priest and things went well until the priest passed away at a ripe old age. A few days after the new priest arrived, he visited the mayor of the town and seemed very concerned. "Mayor, you have to do something about the sidewalks in town. When people come into the confessional, they keep telling me they''ve fallen." The mayor started to laugh, realizing that no one had told the new priest about the code word. But, before he could explain, the priest shook an accusing finger at him and shouted, "I don''t know what you''re laughing about, because your wife has fallen three times this week!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a set of twin alligators that grew up in the same bayou. One, however, was much larger and stronger than the other. One day the twins were sitting there talking, and trying to figure out why one was so much bigger - since they were the same age, had the same genes, and grew up in the same place. The bigger alligator asked his smaller brother where he had been feeding. The smaller said, "down in that parking lot at the end of the bayou, why?". The bigger said, "well, thats where I feed too, what''s your technique?" The smaller then looked at him and said "well, I go over to one of those lawyers cars, and hide up under it, when he comes out, I grab him, shake the shit out of him, and then eat him." The larger then exclaimed, "that''s it! by the time you shake the shit out of a lawyer, there''s nothing left but the briefcase!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do women fart less than men? A: Because they won''t shut up long enough to build up pressure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never forget a face. However, in your case, I''ll be glad to make an exception. -Groucho Marx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our lager, Which art in barrels, Hallowed be thy drink. Thy will be drunk, I will be drunk, At home as it is in the tavern. Give us this day our foamy head, And forgive us our spillages, As we forgive those who spill against us. And lead us not to incarceration, But deliver us from hangovers. For thine is the beer, The bitter, The lager.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an honest lawyer? An oxymoron.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a bar. He sits down and starts staring at a young punk with spiked red hair, multicolored clothes, and an earring. The punk gets mad turns around and says, "Hey old man, what are you looking at?" The old man says, "Nothing, it''s just that when I was in the army, I got really drunk and had sex with a parrot. I was wondering if you were my son."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So ... the other day, my friends and I went to this "Ladies Night Club." One of the girls wanted to impress us, so she pulls out a $10 bill. The "dancer" came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 and put it on his butt cheek. Not to be outdone, another friend pulls out a $20 bill. She calls the guy back over, licks the $20 bill and puts it on his other butt cheek. Still attempting to impress the rest of us, my other friend pulls out a $50 bill. She calls the guy back over again, licks the $50 bill and again puts it on one of his butt cheeks. Now the attention is focused on me. What could I do to top that? I got out my wallet, thought for a minute ... and then the financial analyst in me took over. I got out my ATM card, swiped it down the crack of his ass, grabbed the $80 bucks and went home!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was sitting down in a bar one day next to a red-head. Both of them were sitting there having a good time and then the news turned on. The woman reporter shouted out "This just in! A man is at the edge of a cliff attempting to jump!". Then the red-head leans over to the blonde and whispers, "I bet you $50 that the man''s gonna jump!" The blonde responds back "That''s a bet you have there!". So, both of the women stared at the news waiting to know what''s gonna happen. Then, the man jumps! The blonde turns around to the red-head and hands her the $50. The red-head feeling guilty said "I cant take that there money. I saw the news earlier this mornin'', I knew he was gonna jump off that there cliff." And the blonde says "Well, I did too! But I never would have thought that the man would do it again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, blonde and a redhead walk into a bar. The bartender tells them there is a magic mirror in the back room and if you stand in front of it and say something you think that''s true you''ll get something nice. But if you lie you''ll be sucked in, never to be heard from again. The brunette says, "I think I am the prettiest person in the bar," and she gets a brand new Corvette. The redhead says, "I think I am the smartest person in the bar," and she gets 1 million dollars. The blonde says, "I think---" And she disappeared.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Santa Claus, the tooth fairy an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A: The old drunk of course; the other three are mythical creatures.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a group of eminent scientists got together and decided that mankind had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one scientist to go and tell Him that they were done with Him. The scientist walked up to God and said, "God, we''ve decided that we no longer nee You. We''re at the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, sop why don''t You just retire?" God listened very patiently to the man and then said, "Very well, but first, how about this: Let''s have a man-making contest." To which the scientist replied, "Okay, great!" But God added, "Now we''re going to do this just like I did back in the old days with Adam." The scientist said "Sure, no problem!" and bent down and grabbed himself a handful of dirt. God looked at him and said, "No, no, no. You got to get your own dirt!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Diplomacy: The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three blondes living together. Blonde #1 was coming back from grocery shopping, and she dropped her keys. She walked down the stairs to get them, and she said to herself, "Am I going up the stairs or down the stairs?" So she stood there puzzled, the bags of groceries still in her hands. Blonde #2 was taking a bath, and was draining the tub because it was too cold. With her hair still dry she said to herself, "Was I getting in the tub or out of the tub?" She stood there, just thinking about it. Blonde #3 was sitting in the living room in front of the coffee table, and she said to herself, "Knock on wood I''m not as stupid as the other two!" She knocked on the table. "Was that the front door or the back door?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why didn''t the skeleton go to the dance? A: Because it had no body to go with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does a fish use to get high? A: Seaweed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do a tornado and a redneck divorce have in common? A: In the end, someone''s gonna lose a trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows. We went to look for it and while I was rooting around I noticed that one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail and sure enough, there was my wife''s golf ball... stuck right in the middle of the cows butt. That''s when I made my mistake." "What did you do?" asks the doctor. "Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, ''Hey, this looks like yours!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Nancy was in the backyard filling in a hole when her neighbour peered over the fence. Interested in what the girl was up to he asks, "What are you up to there Nancy?" "My goldfish died," replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, "and I''ve just buried him." The neighbour was concerned, "That''s an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn''t it?" Nancy patted down the last heap of earth and then replied, "That''s because he''s inside your f*****g cat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just before Thanksgiving, the holding pen was abuzz as Mother Turkey scolded the younger birds. "You turkeys are always into mischief," she gobbled. "If your grandfather could see the things you do, he''d turn over in his gravy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bartender at our golf club named a drink Lilac Crazy in honour of one of the members. Every time the member came to the 19th hole, that''s exactly what he did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is writing a problem on the blackboard when she turns around and says, "If you are stupid, please stand up." After a while, a student stands up and says,"I really don''t think I''m stupid, but I feel bad for you standing there by yourself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off. "How did this happen?" the emergency room doctor asked her. "Well, I was trying to commit suicide," the blonde replied. "What?" sputtered the doctor. "You tried to commit suicide by shooting your finger off?" "No, Silly!" the blonde said. "First I put the gun to my chest, and I thought: I just paid $6,000.00 for these breast implants, I''m not shooting myself in the chest." "So then?" asked the doctor. "Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought: I just paid $3000.00 to get my teeth straightened, I''m not shooting myself in the mouth." "So then?" "Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oscar drove his brand new Mercedes car to his favorite sporting goods store. He parked it outside and went in to do a little perusing with Jan, his regular sales woman. Jan was a pretty blonde, and as Oscar walked into the store, she happily greeted him. But he requested to look around alone today before he needed her help. She obliged and let him do his thing. Five minutes later, Jan came running up to him yelling, "Oscar! Oscar! I just saw someone driving off with your new Mercedes!" "Dear God! Did you try to stop him?" "No," she said, "I did better than that! I got the license plate number!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this guy who was married to a blonde, and each night he came home with a new blonde joke. One night the wife got mad and decided to show him that she wasn''t dumb. She spent the whole next day learning all the states and capitals. That night when he got home he told his joke. She says, "I''m not so dumb. I know all of the states and capitals. Go ahead, quiz me." He thought for a moment and asked, "What is the capital of Massachusetts?" She quickly replied, "M."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I''ve kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I''ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10, 000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A blonde." The blonde then pinned the note to the kid''s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10, 000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was swerving all over the road, driving very badly, so she got pulled over by a cop. The cop walked up to her window and asked, "Miss, why are you driving so recklessly?" The blonde said, "I''m sorry sir, but wherever I go, there''s always a tree in front of me and I can''t seem to get away from it!" The cop looked at her and said, "Lady, that''s your air freshener."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes realize that their apartment is on fire and go out onto the balcony. "Help, help!" yelled one of the blondes. "Help us, help us!" yelled the other. "Maybe it would help if we yelled together," said the first blonde. "Good idea," said the other. "Together, together!" they yelled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her...or something like that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back. What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell! She''s got a grenade in her mouth!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a blonde and a brunette working for a painting company. They need to paint the yellow lines on a road by hand for the city since the trucks are broken. The first day the blonde paints 5.4 miles of road, the brunette paints 6 miles of road. The second day the blonde paints 4.1 miles of road, the brunette paints 6.7 miles of road. The third day the blonde paints 2.9 miles of road, the brunette paints 6.9 miles of road. Worried about the blonde, the supervisor goes to the blonde and asks why she is painting less and less road each day. She replies, "The bucket just keeps getting further and further away."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde wanted to sell her car but failed many times. Even though the car looked pratically new it had over 400 000 miles on it. So she goes to a bar and theres a brunette sitting a few barstools away and she''s wearing mechanic''s overalls. They start talking and the blonde tells the brunette her problems. The brunette feels sorry for her. The brunette says, "Well I''m a mechanic. I can help you sell your car but it''s not legal." The blonde says she''ll do whatever it takes. The brunette says, "Well I can change your odometer back to 40 000 miles and it''ll be easier to sell." The blonde agrees and gives the brunette her keys. So the brunette takes the car back to her garage and sets back the counter. Then the next morning returns the car. A week later they run into each other and the brunette asks the blonde if she sold her car. The blonde says, "Why would I sell my car?? It only has 40 000 miles on it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On her birthday, a blonde was given a fishing rod. She decides to use the gift on the weekend and have a good time, so she goes and buys fishing gear and sets out. She goes to what she thinks is a nice fishing spot and drills a hole, then puts her rod in. She hears a man say, "There is no fish in there." So she goes someplace else and drills and puts her rod in. Then hears a man say in an irritated tone, "There is no fish in there." So she repeats the process a third time and again hears the man tell her, "There is no fish in there." Angry, the blonde gets up and faces the man and says, "How do you know there is no fish in there?" The man replies, "This is an ice hockey rink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say you are the perfect idiot. I say you are not perfect, but you are doing pretty good.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate walks into a bar and has a seat. The bartender notices the pirates peg-leg, eyepatch and hook for a hand. The bartender and the pirate start talking and the bartender casually slips in the question of how the pirate lost his leg. The pirate says, "I fell overboard and a shark bit my leg off." They talk more and the bartender asks how the pirate got the hook. The pirate says, "We were boarded by enemy pirates and they cut off my hand before running away. They talk some more and the bartender finally asks how the pirate got his eyepatch. The pirate said, "A seagull crapped in my eye." The bartender says, "Wow! You lost your eye to seagull poo in your eye?" The pirate says, "Well no... it was my first day with the hook."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and has a lot of drinks. He gets completely wasted. He mentions to the bartender that he has his girlfriend sitting in his new corvette outside so she can drive him home. While the bartender went outside to throw out the garbage he notices a corvette with a man and a woman making out in it. He goes back into the bar and tells the man to go check on his girl. The man leaves and comes back laughing and staggering a few minutes later. Confused the bartender asks what is so funny. The man replies, "My friend Bobby is so wasted he thinks he''s me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were going to Disneyland when they came to a fork in the road. The sign read: "Disneyland Left." So they went home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A junior partner in a law firm was sent to a far away country to represent a long-term client accused of robbery. After days of trial, the case was won, the client acquitted and released. Excited about his success, the attorney e-mailed the firm: "Justice prevailed." The senior partner replied in haste, "Appeal immediately."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers? He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren''t met.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man escaped jail by digging a hole from his jail cell to the outside world. When finally his work was done, he emerged in the middle of a preschool playground. "I''m free, I''m free!" he shouted. "So what," said a little girl. "I''m four."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During late spring one year, a blonde was trying out her new boat. She was unable to have her boat perform, travel through water, or do any maneuvers whatsoever no matter how hard she tried. After trying for over three days to make it work properly, she decided to seek help. She putted the boat over to the local marina in hopes that someone there could identify her problem. Workers determined that everything from the engine to the outdrive was working perfectly on the topside of the boat. So, a puzzled marina employee jumped into the water to check underneath the boat for problems. Because he was laughing so hard, he came up choking on water and gasping for air. Under the boat, still strapped in place securely, was the trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who took an hour to cook Minute Rice? Did you hear about the blonde who got into the taxi, and the driver kept the "Vacant" sign up? Did you hear about the blonde who was an M.D.--Mentally Deficient? Did you hear about the blonde who thought nitrates was cheaper than day rates?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t steal. The government hates competition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who got a pair of waterskis? She''s still looking for a lake with a slope!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between men and government bonds? The bonds mature. Eventually.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, a tub of cottage chesse, says to them, "We don''t serve your kind in here." One of the yogurt cartons says back to him, "Why not? We''re cultured individuals."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the word abbreviation so long?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now she''s 97 years old and we don''t know where the hell she is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following is an actual radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations: #1: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision. #2: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to south to avoid a collision. #1: This is the captain of a U. S. navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course. #2: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course. #1. THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER ENTERPRISE. WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE U. S. NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW! #2. This is a lighthouse. Your call.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants. "Well," he said, "I''ve been seeing this girl for a while and she''s really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight''s "the" night. We''re having dinner with her parents, and then we''re going out, and I''ve got a feeling I''m gonna get lucky after that. Once she''s had me, she''ll want me all the time, so you''d better give me the 12 pack." The young man makes his purchase and leaves. Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessing, and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl leans over and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious person." He leans over to her and says, "You never told me that your father is a pharmacist."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Becky was on her deathbed, with her husband Jake at her side. He held her cold hand and tears silently streamed down his face. Her pale lips moved. "Jake," she said. "Hush," he quickly interrupted, "don''t talk." But she insisted. "Jake," she said in her tired voice. "I have to talk. I must confess." "There is nothing to confess," said the weeping Jake. "It''s all right. Everything''s all right." "No, no. I must die in peace. I must confess, Jake, that I have been unfaithful to you." Jake stroked her hand. "Now, Becky, don''t be concerned. I know all about it", he sobbed. "Why else would I poison you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Mr. Conners, Thank you for your letter of February 17th. After careful consideration I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me employment with your company. This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates it is impossible for me to accept all refusals. Despite Company 203''s outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at this time. Therefore I will initiate employment with your firm immediately following graduation. I look forward to seeing you then. Sincerely, XXXXXXXX', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married man and his secretary are having an affair. They decide to leave the office early one day and go to the secretary''s apartment for an afternoon of lovemaking. They fall asleep and don''t wake up until 8 o''clock that night. They quickly get dressed and the man asks his secretary to take his shoes and go rub them in the grass. The secretary thinks this is pretty weird, but she does it anyway. The man finally gets home and his wife meets him at the door. The wife is very upset and asks him where he has been. The husband replies, "I can not tell a lie. My secretary and I are having an affair. We left work early today, went to her place, made love all afternoon, and then we fell asleep. That''s why I''m late!" The wife looks at him, takes notice of his shoes and says, "I see those grass stains all over your shoes. You''ve been playing golf again, haven''t you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 women were playing golf. On the third hole there were 4 men in front of them but about 175 yards down the fairway. The first woman said, "I''ll tee off, he is far enough away." She hit the drive of her life, like a shot straight down the farway. She screamed fore at the top of her lungs and as the men turned he was hit solidly. He was rolling on the ground in pain with his hands between his legs. She ran to him, apologizing and saying, "Let me help I am a physical therapist." He protested but she got him to put his hands at his side. She unzipped his pants and began massaging him. "How does that feel?" she asked. He said, "Great, but my thumb still hurts like hell."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two beautiful statues were in a park, facing each other across the grass, one of a young girl and the other of a young man, looking towards each other like young lovers. These statues gave so much pleasure to people visiting the park that God looked down and decided to reward them with life for 30 minutes, on a Sunday when the park was closed to the public. Immediately when they came alive, they ran together into the bushes and could be heard giggling and cooing with pleasure and the bushes were shaking. After 15 minutes they came out and realised that they still had 15 minutes more life to live. "What shall we do now then," said the boy statue. "Let''s do the same thing again," she replied. "Okay," said the boy statue, "but this time, you hold the pidgeons down while I shit on them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and leave her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems OK, but after a while she slowly starts to fall over sideways in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately rush up to catch her and straighten her up. Again she seems OK, but after a while she starts to tilt to the other side. The nurses rush back and once more bring her back upright. This goes on all morning. Later the family arrives to see how the old woman is adjusting to her new home. They ask,"So Ma, how is it here? Are they treating you all right?" "It''s pretty nice," she replies. "Except they won''t let you fart."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A phone rings at KGB headquarters. "Hello?" "Hello, is this the KGB?" "Yes. What do you want?" "I''m calling to report my neighbor Yankel Rabinovitz as an enemy of the State. He is hiding undeclared diamonds in his fire wood." "This will be noted." The next day, the KGB goons visit Rabinovitz''s house. They search the shed where the fire wood is kept, break every piece of wood there, but find no diamonds. They swear at Yankel Rabinovitz and leave. The phone then rings at Rabinovitz''s house. "Hello, Yankel! Did the KGB come?" "Yes." "Did they chop up your firewood?" "Yes, they did." "Okay, now it''s your turn to call. I need my vegetable patch plowed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A baby boy was just born. He had all his pieces and looked quite normal, except that he was laughing - I mean laughing real hard. All the doctors and nurses were examining the little guy in front of his worried parents. He just kept on laughing, his tiny fists all closed and tears rolling from his eyes. One at a time, a pediatrician unfolded his tiny fingers to check if his hand was all right, and guess what he found? Scroll down. * * * * * * * * * * * * The birth control pill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married man goes to confessional and tells the priest, "I had an affair with a woman... almost." The priest says, "What do you mean, almost?" The man says, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped." The priest replies, "Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You''re not to go near that woman again. Now say five Hail Marys and put $50 in the poor box." The man leaves confessional, says his prayers, then walks over to the poor box. He pauses for a moment and starts to leave. The priest, who was watching him, quickly runs over and says, "I saw that! You didn''t put any money in the poor box!" The man replied, "Well, Father, I rubbed up against it, and you said it was the same as putting it in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a big ol'' tough bear strolling through the forest looking for some silly hunter to maul, when he suddenly got the urge to pass the last hunter he had eaten. He stopped by the side of the path and proceeded to dump away. Well, as he was sitting there, a cute little bunny came bounding along merrily on his way and stopped right beside the bear and also took a dump. Well, the bear was finishing up and hadn''t really said a word to the little bunny so popped a question, "Do you have trouble with shit sticking to your fur, little bunny?" The bunny looked up and replied, "Why no, certainly not." Immediately the bear picked up the bunny and wiped his ass with him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was mowing his front yard when his attractive, blonde, female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to her mailbox. She opened the mailbox, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into her house. A little later, she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and again slammed it shut. Angrily back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, the blonde came out again. She marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" She replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps telling me I have mail!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Canadian fire? A Calgary Flame.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Monica Lewinski and a coin machine have in common? insert bill here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was driving home late one afternoon above the speed limit. He noticed a police car with its red lights in his rearview mirror. He thought, "I can outrun this guy," so he floored it and the race was on. The cars were racing down the highway at 90 miles an hour. Finally, as his speedometer passed 100, the guy figured, "What the heck," and gave up. He pulled over to the curb. The police officer got out of his cruiser and approached the car. He leaned down and said, "Listen mister, I''ve had a really lousy day, and I just want to go home. Give me a good excuse and I''ll let you go." The man thought for a moment and said, "Three weeks ago, my wife ran off with a police officer. When I saw your cruiser in my rearview mirror, I thought you were that officer and you were trying to give her back to me!" The officer let him go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde woman is driving down the road. She notices that she''s low on gas, so she stops at a gas station. While she''s pumping her gas, she notices that she locked the keys in the car. So when she goes inside to pay, she asks the attendant for a hanger so that she can attempt to open the door herself. She returns outside and begins to jimmy the lock. Ten minutes later, the attendant comes out to see how the blonde is faring. Outside the car, the blonde is moving the hanger around and around while the blonde inside the car is saying, "A little more to the left...a little more to the right!..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two young engineers applied for a single position at a computer company. They both had the same qualifications. In order to determine which individual to hire, the applicants were asked to take a test by the Department manager. Upon completion of the test, both men missed only one of the questions. The manager went to the first applicant and said, "Thank you for your interest, but we''ve decided to give the job to the other applicant." "And why would you be doing that? We both got 9 questions correct," asked the rejected applicant. "We have based our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question you missed," said the Department manager. "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other?" the rejected applicant inquired. "Simple," said the Department manager, "Your fellow applicant put down on question #5, ''I don''t know.'' You put down, ''Neither do I.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling. "WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE MY HORSE?" he yelled with surprising forcefulness. No one answered. "ALRIGHT, I''M GONNA HAVE ANOTHA BEER, AND IF MY HORSE AIN''T BACK OUTSIDE BY THE TIME I FINISH, I''M GONNA DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS! AND I DON''T LIKE TO HAVE TO DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS!" Some of the locals shifted restlessly. He had another beer, walked outside, and his horse was back! He saddled-up and started to ride out of town. The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, "Say partner, before you go... what happened in Texas?" The cowboy turned back and said, "I had to walk home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Delta Airlines recently introduced a special half-fare rate for wives accompanying their husbands on business trips. Anticipating some valuable testimonials, the publicity department of the airline sent out letters to all the wives of businessmen who used the special rates, asking them how they enjoyed their trip. Responses are still pouring in asking, "What trip?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?" "None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away." "Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you''re thinking." Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?" "Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone." "No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you''re thinking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a recent publicity outing, Hillary sneaked off to visit a fortune teller of some local repute. In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news. "There''s no easy way to say this, so I''ll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year." Visibly shaken, Hillary stared at the woman''s lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself. She simply had to know. She met the fortune teller''s gaze, steadied her voice, and asked her question. "Will I be acquitted?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is from a contest on Long Island. The requirements were to use the words Lewinski and Kaczynski in a limerick. Here are the 3 winners. Entry # 1 There once was a gal named Lewinsky Who played on a flute like Stravinsky ''Twas "Hail to the Chief" on this flute made of beef that stole the front page from Kaczynski. Entry # 2 Said Bill Clinton to young Ms. Lewinsky We don''t want to leave clues like Kaczynski, Since you look such a mess, use the hem of your dress And wipe that stuff off of your chinsky. Entry # 3 Lewinsky and Clinton have shown what Kaczynski must surely have known: that an intern is better than a bomb in a letter given the choice of how to be blown.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To help students remember the word for "wear" in Latin, the professor used the phrase: semper ubi, sub ubi Translation: Always wear under wear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You don''t have anything in your head except soccer, said a wife to her husband. "I''m sure you''ve even forgotten when we got married!" "Of course I haven''t forgotten," replied the husband. "That was the day England beat Italy 2-1."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 men were being interviewed for a position for the FBI. The interviewers needed to know the men were going to be loyal to the FBI until the very end. So they set up a little test. They put each of the 3 men''s wives in the room. They sent the first man in with a gun, and told him to kill his wife. A few minutes later the man comes out crying. He says, "I just can''t do it. I love her." He gives back the gun. They send the second man in and he comes out crying a few minutes later, hands back the gun, and says, "We''ve had too many good years. I just can''t kill her. I''m sorry." So finally they send in the third applicant. They listen closely to the door and try to see if this man will succeed. They hear a soft click, then a huge commotion. Things were being broken and smashed and a lot of screaming. Coming out tired, the man says to the interviewers, "The damn gun you gave me was loaded with blanks! I had to beat her to death!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do young blondes carry goldfish in their pockets? A. So they can smell like old blondes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed, and driving his partner nuts. Finally, his exasperated partner said, "What''s taking so long? Hit the blasted ball!" The guy answered, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot." "Forget it, man. You don''t stand a chance in hell of hitting her from here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Cajun named Jean Paul moved to Texas and bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. The next day the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry, but I got some bad news. The donkey died." "Well then, just give me my money back." "I can''t do that. I went and spent it already." "OK then, just unload the donkey." "What ya gonna do with em." "I''m gonna raffle him off." "Ya can''t raffle off a dead donkey!" "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won''t tell anyone he''s dead." A month later the farmer met up with the Cajun and asked, "What happened with the dead donkey?" "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at $2 apiece and made a profit of $898." "Didn''t anyone complain?" "Just the guy who won. So I gave him his $2 back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man drives to a gas station and has his tank filled up. The gas-pumper spots two penguins sitting in the back seat of the car. He asks the driver, "What''s up with the penguins in the back seat?" The man in the car says "I found them. I asked myself what to do with them but, I haven''t had a clue." The clerk ponders a bit then says, "You should take them to the zoo." "Hey, that''s a good idea," says the man in the car and drives away. The next day the man with the car is back at the same gas station. The clerk sees the penguins are still in the back seat of the car. "Hey, they''re still here! I thought you were going to take them to the zoo." "Oh, I did," says the driver, "And we had a swell time. Today I am taking them to the beach."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man and a woman were driving and they get into a terrible collision with each other. Both cars are wrecked beyond recognition, but they both crawl out of the wreckage unhurt. The woman says, "In a terrible accident...both of us are alive and, well, this must be a sign from God!" The man agrees. The woman says, "Well, we should celebrate our lives...here, let''s drink to our celebration." She reaches into her wreckage of her car and pulls out a bottle of champagne which miraculously was not broken or even cracked. The man takes a huge gulp of the wine and passes it to the woman who politely waves it away. The man says, "Don''t you want any? It was your idea." The woman says, "No thanks, I''ll wait until the police get here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chucky wanted $100 to buy a remote control car, so he prayed like crazy for two weeks ... but nothing happened. Chucky decided to write God an urgent letter, requesting $100. When the post office received the letter addressed to God, USA, they forwarded the letter to the president. The president was so amused by the letter that he told his secretary to send Chucky a $5 bill, figuring this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. When Chucky received the cash, he was so delighted that he wrote a thank you note which read: Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money. However, I noticed that you sent it through Washington, D.C. Next time, don''t do that because, as usual, those jerks took 95%. Love, Chucky', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very old man and a woman are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. The man starts crying quietly. Touched by the mans sensitive side, she goes over to him, hugs him, and asks him whats the matter. The man says, "Remember when we were 15 and your daddy who was a sheriff caught us? And remember he said I either had to marry you for what we did or I spend 50 years in jail?" The woman nods. The man says, "Well today I could have been a free man."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blonde behind a steering wheel? An Air-Bag', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and has a drink. Then he hears a tiny voice say, "You are so handsome." He looks to see who said that but finds no one. So he drinks again. Then he hears a tiny voice say, "You are so smart and kind." He looks around again and doesn''t find anyone. He asks the bartender whats going on. The bartender says, "O that, that''s the peanuts. They''re complimentary."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 guys die in a car wreck and are sent to heaven. At the gates St. Peter asks the three men what they would want their families to say at the funeral. The first man says, "I want them to say I was an excellent husband and a great police officer." The second man says, "I want them to say I was a great husband, a wonderful teacher and that I made a huge difference in their lives." The third man says, "I wish they would say...LOOK! HE''S MOVING!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyers creed: A man is innocent until proven broke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why does the law prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients? A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for what is essentially the same service.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, in a small town, lived a man named Jack. Everyone in town knew Jack as a very optimistic person. Jack, whenever placed in a terrible situation, would say, "It could have been worse." Everyone in town was tired of hearing Jack say that, so one day they decided to lie to him. They went up to him and said, "Jack, the baker Bob found his wife in bed with another man last night! He shot the man and then himself! Isn''t it terrible?" Then Jack said, "Well, yes it''s terrible, but it could''ve been worse!" The townspeople said, "How could that possibly be worse?" Jack replied, "Well, if it had been the night before I would''ve been dead!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked his doctor if he thought he''d live to be a hundred. The doctor asked the man, "Do you smoke or drink?" "No," he replied. "I''ve never done either." "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or fool around with women?" inquired the doctor. "No, I''ve never done any of those things either." "Well, then," said the doctor, "what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette go parachuting. The blonde jumps first, pulls her parachute cord, and slowly drifts in the air and enjoys the view. The brunette jumps after her and pulls her parachute cord, but nothing happens! She pulls it again, this time as hard as she can, but still nothing. She pulls the cord to the emergency chute, but that doesn''t open either. She passes by the blonde like a speeding bullet! The blonde looks at her and says, while getting her parachute off her shoulders, "So, you want to race, do you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: "My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by his limb." "Well put," the judge replied. "Using your logic, I sentence the defendant''s arm to one year''s imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses." The defendant smiled. With his lawyer''s assistance he detached his artificial limb, laid it on the bench, and walked out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded in the desert because their car broke down. The redhead grabs some water, the brunette grabs some food, and the blonde grabs the car door. They began walking, when the redhead turns to the brunette and says," Why did you bring the food?" She replies, " Well in case I get hungry, I can eat it. Why did you bring water?" The redhead replies, " Well in case I get thirsty, I can drink it." Then they both turn to the blonde and say, " Why did you bring the car door?" She replies, " Well in case I get hot, I can roll down the window."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man enters a Lesbian bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while the blind guy yells to the bartender: "Hey, wanna hear a blonde joke?'' A deathly silence transcends the bar. In a deep, husky, menacing voice, the woman next to him says: "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde, and I''m a 6'' tall, 200lb blonde with a black belt in Karate. What''s more, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and she''s a weight lifter. The lady to your right is a blonde and she''s a pro wrestler. Think about it seriously, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?" The blind man pauses to think, and says, "Nah, not if I''m gonna have to explain it five times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Egyptologist sneezed: Hapshepsut!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever notice that "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Take your income and add 10%', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband & wife are talking. Husband: "How many times have you cheated on me?" Wife: "Only twice." Husband: "Tell me about them." Wife: "Remember when you were very sick, and we didn''t have money to pay for the doctor? Well, I slept with him." Husband: "That''s not so bad; and the other?" Wife: "Remember when you were running in the elections, and you needed 450 votes?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a teacher and a train? A train goes "chew, chew, chew," and a teacher says, "Spit that gum out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many FBI agents does it take to change a lightbulb? Shut up! We''ll be asking the questions here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 3. One to change it and the other two to argue whether the lightbulb really exists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We spend the first twelve months of our children''s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up. -Phyllis Diller', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every solution breeds new problems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Join the Marines: Visit exotic places, meet interesting people and then kill them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to the movies one day, and in the front row there''s an old man. With him was his dog. It was a sad, funny kind of film. You know the type. In the sad part the dog cried his eyes out, and in the funny part the dog laughed his head off. This happened all the way through the film. After the film had ended the guy decides to go and speak to the man. "That''s the most amazing thing I''ve ever seen," he said. "Your dog really seemed to enjoy the film." The man turned. "Yeah, it really is amazing, because he hated the book."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new Polish million dollar lotery? You get a dollar a year for a million years!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I married Miss Right. I just didn''t know her first name was Always.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a blonde smile at lightning? She thinks she''s getting her picture taken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. If you are an AMERICAN when you go into the bathroom and you are an AMERICAN when you come out of the bathroom....What are you WHILE you are in the bathroom? A. EUROPEAN... of course!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on an island. One day, the three of them are walking along the beach and discover a magic lamp. They rub and rub, and sure enough, out pops a genie. The genie says, "Since I can only grant three wishes, you may each have one." The brunette says, "I''ve been stuck here for years. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I just want to go home." POOF! The brunette gets her wish and she is returned to her family. Then, the red head says, "I''ve been stuck here for years as well. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I wish I could go home too." POOF! The redhead gets her wish and she is returned to her family. The blonde starts crying uncontrollably. The genie asks, "My dear, what''s the matter?" The blonde whimpers, "I wish my friends were still here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts. A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks, "Ma''am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?" "Why, officer?" asks the blonde. "Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed." "Oh my goodness," exclaims the blonde, "I left my baby on the bus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A busload of politicians were driving down a country road, when suddenly the bus ran off the road and crashed into an old farmer''s barn. The old farmer got off his tractor and went to investigate. Soon he dug a hole and buried the politicians. A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus and asked the old farmer where all the politicians had gone. The old farmer told him he had buried them. The sheriff asked the old farmer, "Lordy, were they ALL dead?" The old farmer said, "Well, some of them said they weren''t, but you know how them crooked politicians lie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did a blonde take an empty glass and a glass full of water to bed? She wasn''t sure if she would get thirsty during the night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde say when you blow in their ear? Thank you for the refill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man dies and goes to hell. When he arrives Satan gives him a choice of what eternal punishment he''ll be given. They go to a wall with 3 doors. Satan opens the first door and there are people standing on their heads on blocks of ice. The man says, "No way, I cant do this punishment." So they move on to the next room. Satan opens the second door and there are people standing on their heads on a brick floor. The man says, "No way, that would give me headaches forever." So they move on to the next room. Satan opens the door and inside there are people sitting in cow manure drinking tea and eating cookies. The man figures it can''t be that bad so he chooses to spend eternity in that room. Just before Satan closes the door he yells back, "Alrite break time is over! Back on your heads!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they only screw the poor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to screw in a lighbulb? None, they just assume they''ve gone blind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk man stumbles into the bar to the only other customer and asks if the man would buy him a drink. The second man says yes. They have a drink, and the first man decides to fill the quiet gap. He asks, "So where you from?" The second man replies, "Ireland." The first man says, "WOW! Me too. Let''s drink to Ireland." They drink and the second man says, "So what part of Ireland ya from?" The first man says, "Dublin. So...what school did you go to?" The second man says, "St. Sebastians. Graduated in 1969." The first man astonished says, "ME TOO! Damn, what a coincidence." Just then a regular comes in the bar and asks the bartender what''s going on. The bartender replies, "Nothin'' much. The O''Malley twins are drunk again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that''s not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral. -- Robert Orben', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a secretary noticed her boss''s fly was open. Not wanting to embarrass him, she whispers in his ear, "Your barracks are open, and your soldier is saluting at the gates." The man, realizing what she means, decides to have some fun and says, "Do you see the colonel standing to attention?" She whispers back, "No; all I see is a veteran sitting on his two duffel bags."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk phones the police. He yells, "Come quick! Thieves have stolen my dashboard, steering wheel, brake and gas pedal, and my dang radio!! MY RADIO!!" The police are just about to send out an officer when the drunk phones back. He says very calmly, "Sorry officers. It turns out I just got in my backseat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is speeding down a deserted street when she is pulled over by a police officer. The officer very politely requests to see the blondes license. The blonde very indignant replies, "You know what? I''m getting tired of you cops. You just can''t make up your mind. Last week you took away my license, and now you want me to show it to you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many telemarketers does it take to change a light bulb? A. Only one, but he has to do it while you''re eating dinner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign seen on a maternity-ward door: Push! Push! Push!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a dry cleaner and a lawyer? A: The cleaner pays if he loses your suit. A lawyer can lose your suit and still take you to the cleaners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After they''d brought their first baby home from the hospital, a young wife suggested to her husband that he try his hand at changing diapers. "I''m busy," he said. "I''ll do the next one." The next time the baby was wet, she asked if he was now ready to learn how to change diapers. He looked puzzled. "Oh," he replied finally. "I didn''t mean the next diaper. I meant the next baby!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tarzan swings through the air Tarzan loses his underwear Tarzan says "Me no care, Jane make me another pair." Boy swings through the air Boy loses his underwear Boy says "Me no care, Jane make me another pair." Cheetah swings through the air Cheetah loses his underwear Cheetah says "Me no care, Jane make me another pair." Jane swings through the air Jane loses her underwear Jane says "Me no care, Tarzan like me better bare!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a farmer who took a young miss Out back of the barn where he gave her a ... Lecture on horses and cattle and eggs And told she had the most wonderful ... Manners that suited a girl of her charms A girl that he wanted to take in his ... Washing and ironing and then if she did They could get married and raise lots of ... Sweet violets, sweeter than all the roses Covered all over from head to toe Covered all over with sweet violets The girl told the farmer that he better quit Then she called her father and he took a ... Taxi and got there before very long ''Cause someone was treating his little girl ... Right for a change and so that''s why he said If you marry my daughter, you''re better off ... Single, for son it has always been my belief That marriage will bring a man nothing but ... Sweet violets, sweeter than all the roses Covered all over from head to toe Covered all over with sweet violets', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you sure you don''t want some Novocain? asked the dentist. "I''m sure," replied the maharishi. "I wish to transcend dental medication."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have a very rare and extremely contagious condition, the doctor told his patient. "We''re going to put you in an isolation unit, where you''ll be on a diet of pancakes and pizza." "Will pancakes and pizza cure my condition?" "No," replied the doctor. "They''re the only things we can slip under the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men were sitting by the swimming pool at a nudist colony when they noticed a beautiful young woman walking towards the pool. Her tan lines traced the outline of a tiny bathing suit with elaborately criss-crossed straps across the back. "I''ll bet she looks great in that suit," one of the men said wistfully.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An RCMP officer pulled over a vehicle that had performed a rolling stop at a stop sign. When the driver was told this, he replied, "But it says STOP, not STAY!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer pulled over a vehicle that had just driven through an intersection without slowing for the traffic light, which flashes red continually. (It flashes amber for the cross direction.) The driver, blonde of course, explained, "But I didn''t go through on the RED, I went through on the BLACK!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seen on a bumper sticker: "I don''t care who''s on board, what you love, who you brake for or what you''d rather be doing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All my life I wanted to be someone; I guess I should have been more specific. -Jane Wagner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world. -Dave Barry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse a stupid person? Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do blondes hate making Kool-aid? They can''t fit the 8 cups of water in the envelope!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes? Why can''t they make the whole plane out of the same stuff?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat that the last time she saw 90210 is when she stepped on the bathroom scale!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This American is on a business trip to Mexico and has the first day off. He decides he wants to ride a donkey, a traditional Mexican thing. He asks this local man if he can rent a donkey for the day. The man says, "Gringo we call them asses here in Mexico. If you want him to stop though you need to scratch him." The American agrees and pays the Mexican man his money and rides away. The man then decides that he wants something to eat so he rides to a hot dog stand. He asks the man if he can get a hot dog with mustard and relish. The man then replies "Sir, we call them weeners here." The American agrees and hands the man his money. He then sees that his donkey is slowly walking away. So he asks another man standing by him who is also American if he would "hold his weener so he can scratch his ass"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Dolly Parton be a teacher? Because every time she turns around she erases the black board.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why are 1990 American dollar bills worth more than 1989 American dollar bills? A. One thousand nine hundred and ninety dollar bills are worth one dollar more than one thousand nine hundred and eighty-nine dollar bills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunken man was wondering around the parking lot of a bar, bumping into then rubbing the roofs of the cars. The manager comes out of the bar and stops the guy. "What the heck are you doing?" he asks the drunk. "I''m looking for my car, and I can''t find it." he replies. "So how does feeling the roof help you?" asks the puzzled manager. "Well," replies the drunk earnestly, "My car has two blue lights and a siren on the roof!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What''s the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A: A dog only takes a couple of months to train.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To the tune of "I''m Looking Over a Four Leaf Clover": I''m looking over my dead dog Rover That I ran over with the power mower One leg is missing, another is gone The third leg is scattered all over the lawn No need explainin'' the one remainin'' Is under the car port door I''m looking over my dead dog Rover That I overlooked before!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mommy, I hate my sister''s guts! "Shut up and eat what''s put in front of you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Then there was the model who sat on a broken bottle and cut a good figure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She frowned and called him Mr. Because in sport he kr. And so in spite That very night The Mr. kr. sr.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you stand it? the young psychiatrist asked the old psychiatrist. "Day in, day out, year in, year out, listening, listening, listening!" "Who listens?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Then there was the neat nurse, who made the patient without disturbing the bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Then there were the three bears. One married a giraffe. The other two put him up to it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mind Over Matter If you don''t mind, it doesn''t matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Madame, said the psychiatrist, "you haven''t got a complex; you ARE inferior."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently a guy in Paris nearly got away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre. However, after planning the crime, and getting in and out past incredible security, he was captured only two blocks away when his Econoline ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied: I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The wife ran into the house, screaming to her actor husband, "Darling, come quick. Your kids and my kids are beating up on our kids!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Romans had to give up their big holidays because of the tremendous overhead. The lions ate up all of their prophets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that when we talk to God we call it praying, yet when God talks to us we are schizophrenic? -Lily Tomlin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you see that movie about the pirate? It''s rated Arrr!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, it takes 2 toilets to fit one cheek!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama so fat that she has to wear traintracks for a belt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama so old and fat that she went to see Mt. Rushmore and sang "We Are Family"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama so big that people walk around her for exercise.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Jimmy bit his fingernails all the time. His parents tried everything to get him to stop, but to no avail. Finally, his mother, exasperated, decided to tell him a little white lie to get him to stop. "Jimmy," she said, "You''d better stop biting your fingernails. If you don''t, then those fingernails will pile up inside your stomach and soon your stomach will be huge and full of fingernails." Jimmy, worried about the idea of fingernails in his stomach, agreed to stop. The next day, Jimmy and his mom were shopping in a supermarket. They went to check out, and a pregnant woman was waiting in line in front of them. Jimmy beamed at the pregnant woman and said, "I know what YOU''VE been doing...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Duck #1: Quack Duck #2: Quack Duck #3: Quack Quack Duck #1 takes out a gun and shoots Duck #3. Duck #2: "Why did you shoot him?" Duck #1: "He knew too much."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Little Red Riding Hood was walking in the woods. She put her head between some bushes and suddenly she sees the wolf with his eyes wide open and red. She asks him, "Why are your eyes so big, wolf?" The wolf answers, "Shut up and let me shit in peace!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked, "Is my time up? God said, "No, you have another 43 years, two months and eight days to live." Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction and tummy tuck. Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well look even nicer. After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was hit and killed by an ambulance. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn''t you pull me out of the path of that ambulance?" God replied, "Girl, I didn''t recognize you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Mary short for? For having no legs, of course...If you didn''t have any, you would be short too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, have any of you heard of the kidnapping in the woods? Yeah, well, it all turns out OK, though, since he woke up...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man has returned to his car after coming out of a local shopping centre and notices that his rear bumper is completely bashed in and the back half of his car is severely crushed. He goes to the front to see if there''s any damage there and finds a note on the windshield. Relieved that the other motorist left a note he opens it up and reads it. It says, "Dear Sir or Madam, So very sorry about your car. But you see, I don''t currently have insurance so I can''t afford to pay you for the damages. But a crowd was gathering after I had smashed your car and I had to look like I was writing down my name and phone number. And since I couldn''t do that, I decided to write this instead. Have a nice day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are sitting there enjoying the Saturday night baseball game. It is the top of the 2nd inning when suddenly they notice two Nuns arrive at the game. Lo and behold the Nuns enter the row in front of them and make there way along, of course sitting directly in front of them. Well, their disgust was overwhelming... Nuns... at a baseball match!!! One of them immediately comes out with the comment "Go to a basketball game, ya wouldn''t find Nuns there now would ya!?". A little while on, the other of the two comments "Go to a football game, ya wouldn''t find Nuns there now would ya!?". Again, not more than five minutes later, the first one mentions "Go to a Ice Hockey game, you wouldn''t find Nuns there now would ya!?". Well that was obviously the breaking point and immediately one of the Nuns turned to the two men, bellowing "Go to hell! Ya won''t find Nuns there either!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the doctor and says "Doctor doctor! I can''t eat food through my mouth cause it hurts" The doc says "Try eating through your bum, it might help" A few weeks later the doctor sees the man walking down the road in a very weird way, he asks "Why are you walking like that? Are you hurt?" The man replies "No you fool! I''m chewing a toffie"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In your next life would you rather be a female bear? If you''re a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. Could you deal with that? Before you hibernate, you''re supposed to eat yourself stupid. Could you deal with that too? If you''re a bear, you give birth to your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you''re sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute cuddly cubs. Could you deal with that? If you''re a mumma bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them, too. Could you deal with that? If you''re a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat. Any women out there rather be a bear?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a female brain cell which, by mistake, happened to end up in a man''s head. She looked around nervously, but it was all empty and quiet. "Hello?" she cried...but no answer. "Is there anyone here?" she cried a little louder, but still no answer.... Now the female brain cell started to feel alone and scared and yelled: "HELLO, IS THERE ANYONE HERE?" Then she heard a voice from far, far away ... "Hello - we''re all down here...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, George W. Bush was leaving a very interesting meeting of the United Nations. Once stepping outside, he was met by the Iraqi ambassador, and he started to talk to George. "You know, George, my children are here on this trip with me to the States, and they have gained interest in your television programs. They have especially like the television show Star Trek, although one thing is bothering them about it...The show shows how the races of the Earth can come together in the starship Enterprise, although, they have never seen an Iraqi citizen aboard the ship, and they were just wondering; Why is that?" George chuckles a little and gives him a short answer to his question. "Because it takes place in the FUTURE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat she used Saturn''s rings as hoola-hoops!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are two blondes doing in front of a motorcycle? Arguing about who get a window seat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a smart blond? An Endangered species', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a movie about a man trying to make a blond smart? Mission Impossible', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 99 Blonds on a plane and 1 Brunette. The captain radios in that they are going down, So they drop all the luggage. They were still going down so they drop out all the chairs. They were still going down so they dropped the floor. So they are hanging by their hands from the top on the plane with no floor. So the captain say''s "1 person jump out" the Brunette say''s "I''ll sacrifice my life", and all the Blonds start clapping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do blondes climb chain-link fences? To see what''s on the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a blond wear a tight skirt? To keep her legs closed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is more stupid then a brunette trying to start a fire in a pool? A blonde trying to put it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an intelligent blonde? A Golden Retriever', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is on the road when suddenly she gets a phonecall from her friend: "Watch out! I heard on the radio that some lunatic is going against traffic!" So the blonde says, "Only one? They all are!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Dyslexics does it take to change a Lit Blub?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anyone remember Roy Clark, host of TV''s "Hee Haw"? Once, cohost Buck Owens was visiting Roy''s home in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. Roy was upset because he had just bought a beautiful new pair of genuine leather boots that were completely destroyed by a mountain lion the night before when Roy had left them on the back porch. Roy was bound and determined to get the animal, so he and Buck, and several townspeople, took up arms and searched the hills. The group searched for hours to no avail. Then suddenly, Buck heard a feline wail. Buck turns to his friend and sings: "Pardon me Roy, is that the cat that chewed your new shoes?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do ducks have webbed feet? To stamp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was unveiled by scientists as "The Funniest Joke in the World": Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn''t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let''s make sure he''s dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and her young son returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. The boy opened the box of animal crackers and spread them all over the table. "What are you doin?" his mother asked; "you can''t eat them if the seal is broken." The boy explained, "I''m looking for the seal."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A waiter asks a man, "May I take your order, sir?" "Yes," the man replies. "I''m just wondering, exactly how do you prepare your chickens?" "Nothing special, sir. We just tell them straight out that they''re going to die."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat, she coughed next to a corn field and made popcorn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between men and women? Women zoom with a camera by walking closer or farther away; men just push the button!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Likes people that oppress him: teachers, parents, principals, police, and authority figures. 9. Is overly enthusiastic about ''Dungeons and Dragons'' and other role playing games. 8. Very familiar with megahertz, wears glasses and, can quote scripture. 7. Frequently speaks of martial arts, but still gets beaten up. 6. Says ''Whom'' instead of ''Who.'' 5. Is pleased when disruptive individuals are sent to the office, so that they can continue with their learning. 4. Prefers NPR to any music. 3. Gets upset when there is a test or quiz that he did not know about. 2. Rooted for Deep-Blue in the famous chess game. 1. Must be pulled off bridge when not accepted at the college of his choice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three couples went to a resturant. The women wanted to compliment the men with something that was on the table. "Could you pass me the sugar, sugar?" said the first gal. "Could you pass me the honey, honey?" said the second. "Could you pass me the bacon, pig?" said the third.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: "Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man." The man then replies: "Yeah, well we were married 35 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 degrees Celsius. The Russians used a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That''s the ugliest baby that I''ve ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off; go ahead, I''ll hold your monkey for you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the wall say to the picture? How''s it hangin`?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wilfred had just learned his abc''s and was very scared of doing them in front of the class. The teacher, though, told him that the best way to conquer his fears would be to just go ahead and do it. So, trembling, he stood in front of the class and began. "ABCDEFGHIJLKMNOQRSTUVWXYZ." "Very good, Wilfred. But you forgot the P. Where''s the P? "It''s running down my leg."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wonder who came up with the company People''s Gas and where was their Pepto-Bismal?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are so stupid you tripped over a cordless phone! You are so stupid you got locked in a furniture store and sat on the floor! You are so stupid you didn''t know how to swim so you got in the fish tank to try and learn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when the smog clears over southern California? UCLA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mama Skunk had two children named In and Out. The two were always on the go, but rarely in one place at the same time. Whenever In was in, Out was out. Whenever In was out, Out was in. One day at dinner time, Out was home, but In was no where to be seen. Mama Skunk sent Out out to bring In in for dinner. Out quickly returned with In and Mama was amazed. "However did you find In so quickly in all the vast forest?" asked Mama. "Easy," said Out. "Instinct!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was enjoying a pleasant afternoon of golf. On the 15th hole, he drove his ball to the right of the fairway into a patch of buttercups. As he neared the ball, he heard a small voice say, "Please sir, don''t hurt my buttercups!." He looked around, but there was no one nearby. So he starts towards his ball again and hears, "Please sir, don''t hurt my buttercups!" Well, the man is a little disturbed by this, so he decides to leave that ball and play another, even though this will cost him a stroke. After he makes his play, an elf appears! "Thank you, sir, for not hurting my buttercups. As a reward, I will give you all the butter you could ever want." "Well, that''s great," replied the man, "but where were you when I was in the pussy willows?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thought I was stupid, Then I met you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man#1 is mowing his lawn when 2 hearses come down his street going very very slowly. The hearses are followed by a man walking a dog. And behind the man and the dog is a line of men walking single-file. There must have been 5 or 6 dozen men following. Curious about the procession Man#1 runs to catch up with Man#2 and his dog. Man#1 asks Man#2 who''s in the first hearse. Man#2 replies, "My wife. My dog bit her. And she died in the hospital a bit later." Man#1 says, "I''m so very sorry for your loss. Mind if I ask who''s in the second hearse?" Man#2 says, "Not at all, it''s my mother in law. My dog also bit her and she died later in the hospital." Man#1 replies, "Can I borrow your dog?" Man#2, "Get in line."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know a blonde is having a bad day? Her tampon is behind her ear, and she''s looking for her pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The crime boss and his attorney meet with his accountant. "Where''s the $3 million you embezzled from me?" demands the gangster. The accountant is silent. "Where''s my $3 million?" the crime boss shouts. The lawyer explains: "Sir, the man is deaf. Allow me to translate." Using sign language, the attorney asks the accountant about the money; the message relayed back is that the accountant knows nothing about it. Furious, the crime boss pulls out a revolver and puts it to the accountant''s head, screaming at the lawyer, "Ask him again where my %#*!@#&*# money is!" "Okay! Okay!" the deaf accountant signs back. "The money''s hidden behind the old toolshed in my backyard." "What did he say?" demands the enraged crime boss. The attorney replies, "He says you don''t have the guts to pull the trigger."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1960''s arithmetic test: A logger cuts and sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is four fifths of that amount. What is his profit? 1970''s new-math test: A logger exchanges a set (L) of lumber for a set (M) of money. The cardinality of set M is 100. The set C of production costs contains 20 fewer points. What is the cardinality of set P of profits? 1980''s "dumbed down" version: A logger cuts and sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost is $80, his profit is $20. Find and circle the number 20. 1990''s version: An unenlightened logger cuts down a beautiful stand of 100 trees in order to make a $20 profit. Write an essay explaining how you feel about this as a way to make money. Topic for discussion: How did the forest birds and squirrels feel?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I make money the old-fashioned way. My salary is the same as it was ten years ago.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My husband won a trip for two to Hawaii, a woman complained to her marriage counsellor. "He went twice!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack tells his shrink, "Last night I dreamed you were my mother." "How did you feel about it after you woke up?" asks the psychiatrist. "I overslept," answers Jack. "Then I remembered I had an appointment with you, so I grabbed a Coke and some cookies for breakfast and came right over. I didn''t really have time to think about it. What does it mean, doc?" "A Coke and some cookies?" says the psychiatrist. "You call that breakfast?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NAMES OF ACTUAL COUPLES GETTING MARRIED: Broken-Bridge Sarry-Huney Big-Theisman Lossin-Hare Redder-Bottum CAN''T WAIT TO SEE HOW LONG THOSE COUPLES LAST!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Actual Newspaper Headline: Kids Make Great Snacks For Teachers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an examination to determine the cause of her daughter''s swollen abdomen. It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say "Gimmee a break lady! Your daughter is pregnant." The mother turned red with fury and she argued with the doctor that her daughter was a good girl and would never compromise her reputation by having sex with a boy. The doctor faced the window and silently watched the horizon. The mother became enraged an screamed, "Quit looking out the window! Aren''t you paying attention to me?" "Yes, of course I am paying attention ma''am. It''s just that the last time this happened, a star appeared in the east, and three wise men came. I was hoping they would show up again and help me figure out who got your daughter pregnant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following ad is reported to have gotten numerous calls: SINGLE BLACK FEMALE... Seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant.. I''m a svelte good looking girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pickup truck, hunting, camping, and fishing trips, cozy winter nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. Rub me the right way and watch me respond. I''ll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Kiss me and I''m yours. Call xxx-xxxx and ask for Daisy." Callers found themselves talking to the local Humane Society about an eight-week-old black Labrador Retriever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tonto and the Lone Ranger were lost on the prairie one day. The Lone Ranger says to Tonto, "Use your Indian instincts and get us out of this mess." Tonto bends down and puts his ear to the ground. He turns and says to the Lone Ranger, "Buffalo come." The Lone Ranger says to Tonto, "How do you know?" Tonto says, "Ear sticky."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t blind people sky dive? Because it scares the crap outta the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Constipated Mathematicians do? Work it out with a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly not even the tide would take her out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man visiting a graveyard saw a tombstone that read, "Here lies John Kelly, a lawyer and an honest man." "Well, how about that!" he exclaimed. "They''ve got three people buried in one grave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overheard in a doctor''s waiting room: "My uncle had a cough like yours and he died. Mind you, he was hiding under his neighbour''s bed at the time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the scientist who crossed a carrier pigeon with a woodpecker? He got a bird that not only delivers messages to their destination but knocks on the door when it gets there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Zen Buddhist say to the New York hot-dog vendor? "Make me one with everything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mother to teenage daughter: "The bad news is, we''re moving to a different city. The good news is, your new school is full of boys who didn''t see you get sick in the cafeteria last month."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pride is what you feel when your kids net $143 from a garage sale. Panic is what you feel when you realize your car is missing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest was walking down the street when he saw a little boy jumping up and down to try to reach a doorbell. So the priest walked over and pressed the button for the youngster. "And now what, my little man?" he asked. "Now," said the boy, "run like hell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning, as was his custom, the pastor of a small church had all the children come up front for a brief children''s church. He enjoyed asking the children various questions, and hearing their answers. On this particular morning, he noticed little Susie feeling a bit shy, so he leans over to her and says, "Susie, that''s certainly a lovely dress you''re wearing!" Little Susie then leans over and says right into the pastor''s lapel mic, "yes, and my mommy says its a bitch to iron".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You hear crack is illegal and you pull up your pants. Someone yells "Hoe Down" at a dance and your wife falls to the floor. You use newspapers for more than 3 uses in your home. Your family tree is a wreath. If your home is mobile but the 4 cars in your yard are not. Your father gave you this advice, "If you can''t keep it in your pants, at least keep it in the family." The last thing relatives say before they die is, "Hey Ya''ll! Watch this!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk stumbles into a confessional. The priest on the other side hears someone enter but yet the man does not speak. So the priest knocks on the wall of the confessional and hears the drunk say, "Forget it buddy, theres no toiletpaper in this one either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 6999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For Gods sakes Bill! Help her find it!. ~Hillary after walking in with Monica on her hands and knees in front of Bill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy took his blonde girlfriend to a football game for the first time. After the game he asked his girlfriend how she liked the game. "Oh, I really liked it," she said, "but I just couldn''t understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents." What on earth do you mean???" Well, I saw them flip a coin and one team got it and then for the rest of the game all they kept screaming was: "Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young child walks into a corner store and picks up a big box of laundry detergent. The storekeep trying to be friendly says, "Got a lot of laundry to do?" The boy says, "Haha no. I''m actually going to go wash my dog with it." The storekeep says, "Son, that stuff is very powerful. If you use it to wash your dog the dog might become sick or even die!" The boy replies, "Don''t worry, he''ll be fine." And the boy leaves. The next day the boy returns to buy some candy. The storekeep asks the boy about his dog and how the washing went. The boy replies sadly, "He died..." The storekeep says as gently as he can, "I''m sorry son. But I warned you this might happen if you wash the dog with detergent." The boy replies, "I don''t think it was the laundry detergent that killed him. I think it was the spin cycle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked people for fifty-thousand dollars for his talking dog. He brings him into the bar, but the bartender doesn''t believe the dog can talk so the guy asks the dog, "What''s the opposite of smooth?" The dog says, "Rough." And then the guy asks the dog, "What''s the part of the house that has the chimney sticking out of it?" "Roof." "And who was the great homerun hitter in the twenties and thirties?" "Ruth!" The bartender says, "You big fake, get that dog out of here." So the guy and his dog go outside. Then the dog says, "What was I supposed to say? Mel Ott?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don''t know, it has never happened.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 old ladies are at the bus stop waiting for a bus when it starts to rain. Not wanting to lose her cigarette, one of the old ladies took a condom and a pair of scissors out of her purse, snipped off the end of the condom and slid it over her cigarette. The 2nd lady noticed this and thought it was a brilliant idea, so the next day she goes to the pharmacy and asks for a pack of condoms. The man says, "Sure, what size would you like?" The woman, thinking about her cigarettes, says, "One that will fit a Camel."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seeing her son is still in bed, Mary goes to wake him up for school. When she wakes him up he says, "But I don''t want to go to school mom." Mary quite annoyed at this childlike behaviour says, "Well why not? You have to go." The son replies, "But I don''t like it. The kids are mean to me, the teachers hate me, and everyone makes fun of me." Mary calmly replies, "I''m sorry son. But you MUST go to school!." The son says, "But whyyyy?" Mary annoyed at the delay says, "Because you''re the damn principal!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With the daily time taken working on computers, avoiding things like RSI and any strain related illnesses is crucial to maintaining a healthy working environment. The following excercise has been devised by medical experts in the field of RSI research to ensure that if performed, will place the exerciser in a position of minimal risk. Simply follow the on-screen instructions. Scroll down. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Scroll Up', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?" She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won''t sleep with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table. After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I''m sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I''m a graduate student in psychology and I''m studying how people respond to embarrassing situations." To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean, $200?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the definition of Endless Love? Stevie Wonder playing Ray Charles at Tennis! Endless Love!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The eight Saddam body doubles are gathered in one of the bunkers in downtown Baghdad. Tariq Aziz, the deputy prime minister, comes in and says, ''I have some good news and some bad news.'' They ask for the good news first. Aziz says, ''The good news is that Saddam is still alive, so you all still have jobs.'' ''And the bad news?'' they ask. Aziz replies, ''He''s lost an arm''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man has just been in a car accident and has severe brain damage. So his sister is called in to take care of his medical decisions. First off, the doctor decides the man needs a new brain since his is so badly damaged. So they need to go find a brain for the transplant. They go down to the basement where all the brains are and there are 3 jars. The doctor points to the first jar and says, "That brain belonged to a woman. It will cost your brother $20 a gram." The doctor then points to the second jar, "That will cost you $40 a gram. It once belonged to one of our female doctors and she was quite a brilliant person." The doctor then points to the third jar and says, "That is a brain that once belonged to a man. It costs $200 a gram." The sister replies, "Why is the male brain so much more expensive?" The doctor replies, "Are you joking!? Do you know how hard it is to find a gram of a male''s brain??"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A highway patrolman pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway. As the officer peered through the driver''s window, he was astounded to find that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "Pull over!" at the top of his lungs. "No!" the blonde yelled back, "Scarf!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man hadn''t been feeling well, so he went to his doctor for a complete check-up. Afterward, the doctor came out with the results. "I''m afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor said, "you''re dying, and you don''t have much time left." "Oh, that''s terrible!" said the man. "How long have I got?" "Ten," the doctor said sadly. "Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!" The doctor interrupted, "Nine..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says "I''m sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, ''Guess who?''" "But why?" asks the man. "I''m a divorce lawyer," the man replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor vacationing on the Riviera met an old lawyer friend and asked him what he was doing there. The lawyer replied, "Remember that lousy real estate I bought? Well, it caught fire, so here I am with the fire insurance proceeds. What are you doing here?" The doctor replied, "Remember that lousy real estate I had in Mississippi? Well, the river overflowed, and here I am with the flood insurance proceeds." The lawyer looked puzzled. "Gee," he asked, "how did you start the flood?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy phones a law firm and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer." The receptionist says, "I''m sorry, but your lawyer died last week." The next day the same guy phones the law firm and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer." Once again the receptionist replies, "I''m sorry, but your lawyer died last week." The next day the guy makes his regular call to the law firm and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer." "Excuse me sir," the receptionist says, "but this is third time I''ve had to tell you that your lawyer died last week. Why do you keep calling?" The guy replies, "Because I love hearing it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Marine was coming home from the Pentagon one day. He noticed that there was a lot more traffic than normal. As he got further up the road all of the traffic had come to a halt. He saw a policeman coming towards his car, so he asked the cop what was wrong. The cop said, "Man we are in a crisis situation. Mr. Clinton is in the road very upset. He does not have the $33.5 million that he owes his lawyers, and his family hates him. He is threatening to douse himself in gasoline and start a fire." The marine asked the cop exactly what he was doing there. The cop said, "I feel sorry for the president so I am going car to car asking for donations." The marine asked, "How much do you have so far?" The cop replied, "Well as of right now only 33 gallons, but many people are still siphoning as we speak!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning, the priest noticed Little Johnny was staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. It was covered with names, and small American flags were mounted on either side of it. The seven-year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the priest walked up, stood beside the boy, and said quietly, "Good morning, Little Johnny." "Good morning, Father," replied the young man, still focused on the plaque. "Father Scott, what is this?" Little Johnny asked. "Well, son, it''s a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service." Soberly, they stood together, staring at the large plaque. Little Johnny''s voice was barely audible when he asked, "Which service, the 9:45 or the 11:15?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich lonely widow decided that she needed another man in her life so she placed an ad, which read this: RICH WIDOW LOOKING FOR MAN TO SHARE LIFE AND FORTUNE ...NEEDS TO HAVE THESE QUALIFICATIONS: 1) WON''T BEAT ME UP 2) WON''T RUN AWAY 3) HAS TO BE GREAT IN BED For several months, her phone rang off the hook, her doorbell was ringing constantly, she received tons of mail, etc., all to no avail: none seemed to match her qualifications. Then one day the doorbell rang yet again. She opened the door to find a man with no arms and no legs lying on the welcome mat. Perplexed, she asked, "Who are you? And what do you want?" "Hi," he said, "your search is over, for I''m the man of your dreams. I''ve got no arms so I can''t beat you up and no legs so I can''t run away." "Well, then," she said, "what makes you think that you''re so great in bed?" To which he replied - "Well, I rang the doorbell, didn''t I?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat when she steps on a scale, it reads "one at a time, please"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Contrary to popular opinion, life is NOT a bi**h. Life is a virgin. A bi**h would be easy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? You can''t hear an enzyme!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A decrepit old gas man named Peter While hunting around for the meter His torch he did light He arose out of sight And, of course, as a result, he totally, completely and utterly destroyed the meter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where do cows go on Saturday nights? A: To the moovies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s a little known fact that William Tell and his son were avid bowlers as well as archery buffs. Unfortunately, all the league records were destroyed in a fire, so it may never be known for whom the Tells bowled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently went to my 30th class reunion from nursery school. I didn''t want to go because I''ve put on maybe 90 or 100 pounds since then.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wealthy man came home from a gambling trip and told his wife that he had lost their entire fortune and that they''d have to drastically alter their life-style. "If you''ll just learn to cook," he said, "we can fire the chef." "Okay," she said. "And if you learn how to make love, we can fire the gardener."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear goes into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender replies, "Sorry we dont serve bears here." The bear, upset, says angrily, "Gimme a beer or I''ll eat that lady over there!" The bartender says, "Go ahead, I don''t care." The bear goes and savagely mauls the woman then eats her in front of the bartender. The bear goes and says, "Now give me a beer or I''ll eat someone else." The bartender says, "I''m sorry we don''t serve bears on drugs in here." The bear goes, "What? I''m not on drugs!" The bartender says, "What about the barbituate?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was walking past a schoolyard during recess when she saw a young girl standing all alone on one end of the soccer field, while the other children all played a game of soccer. Feeling sorry for the poor child, she went up to the girl and made small talk. She asked the little girl if she was OK. The little girl replied she was fine. The blonde then said, "Why don''t you go play with the other children?" The little girl replied, "I already am." The blonde, a bit annoyed said, "What do you mean, you already am?" The girl replied, "I am playing." The blonde, thinking the girl was lying so she wouldnt be embarassed, said, "Wanna be friends?" The girl hesitated, then reluctantly said Sure. The blonde, feeling she made progress, says, "Would you like to go play in the sandbox?" The girl replies, "Sure... after I''m done playing soccer. I''m the goalie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you trust a blonde to call for an ambulance? She can''t find the 11 to call 911.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so bald when she wears a turtleneck she looks like a broken condom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat when she stepped on my dog''s tail I had to change his name to "Beaver."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde call the welfare office? She wanted to know how you cook food stamps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The amount of sleep required by the average person is about five minutes more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say one way to build character is to do things you don''t want to do. Every day I do two things I don''t want to do: I get out of bed in the morning and go to bed at night!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money. -- Jackie Mason', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The perfect climate is in bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an oxymoron? A: A smart blonde!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a dirty joke? A boy fell in a mud puddle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor came to a sanitarium to check up on the patients. He sees that everybody is walking around with an empty leash. So he asks a few patients what they are doing. They all answered that they are taking their dog out on a walk. Only one of the patients said "What are you, blind? I''m holding an empty leash!" So the doctor says "Very good, I see you are not as crazy as everyone else." When the doctor leaves, the patient says, "Did you see how we fooled him, Sparky?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor goes into a sanitarium one day to check up on the patients. He sees they are all lined up with bathing suits on, jumping into the air and landing hard on the floor. He asks them what they are doing, and they all answer "We''re diving into the pool". Only one of them sits aside watching them. "I see you''re not diving into the pool" the doctor says. The patient replies "I''m the lifeguard."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you breed a blonde and a New York gangster? A juvenile deliquent who spray paints chain link fences.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A poor Jamaican fisherman was shipwrecked on a desert island. He had lost his boat, his livelihood and possessions. He was trudging round the island in a dejected mood when he came across an old brass lamp washed up on the beach. Remembering the tale of Aladdin (and the role of magic lamps in jokes) he rubbed it. POOF! A Genie appeared. A Jewish Genie. "Vey!" he said. "Am I glad to be outta there. Three hundred years I bin in that thing, my life and soul! What can I do for you my boy?" The Jamaican asked if the Genie granted wishes. "Wishes, Schmishes! Course I do. I''ll grant you two wishes, used to be three but I gotta think about my margins." "Well," said the Jamaican after some consideration "I''d like to be white and surrounded by women." "No problem" said the Genie. POOF! - the Jamaican was transformed into a tampon. Moral: Never do business with a Jewish Genie - there''s always a string attached', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CLASSIC QUOTE: A quote from Sky News "Umm Qasr is a city similar to Southampton," UK defence minister Geoff Hoon said in the Commons yesterday. "He''s either never been to Southampton, or he''s never been to Umm Qasr," says a British squaddie patrolling Umm Qasr. Another soldier added: "There''s no beer, no prostitutes and people are shooting at us. It''s more like Portsmouth."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married couple are driving along when they see a wounded skunk on the side of the road. They stop, the wife gets out, picks it up, and brings it into the car. She says, "Look, it''s shivering, it must be cold. What should I do?" Her husband replies, "Put it between your legs to keep it warm." She asks, "What about the smell?" He says, "Hold its nose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy with a black eye boards his plane and sits down in his seat. He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye, too. He says to him, "Hey this is a coincidence, we both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours?" The other guy says, "Well, it just happened. It was a tongue twister accident. See, I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the most massive breasts in the world was there. So, instead of saying, I''d like two tickets to Pittsburgh,'' I accidentally said, I''d like two pickets to Tittsburgh''........... So she socked me a good one. The first guy replied, "Wow! This is unbelievable. Mine was a tongue twister too. I was at the breakfast table this morning and I wanted to say to my wife, ''Please pour me a bowl of Frosties, honey.'' But I accidentally said, ''You ruined my life you evil fat slag.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment, they both manage to get to sleep, the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower. In the middle of the night, the woman leans over and says, "I''m sorry to bother you, but I''m awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly pass me another blanket." The man leans out and, with a glint in his eye, says, "I''ve got a better idea.....let''s pretend we''re married." "Why not?" giggles the woman. "Good," he replies. "Get your own f***ing blanket."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. "What are you doing?" She asked. "Hunting Flies" He responded. "Oh!, Killing any?" She asked. "Yep, 3 males, 2 Females", he replied. Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell?" "3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I take a long time, I am slow. When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough. When I don''t do it, I am lazy. When my boss doesn''t do it, he''s too busy. When I do it without being told, I''m trying to be smart. When my boss does the same, that is initiative. When I please my boss, that''s brown-nosing. When my boss pleases his boss, that''s co-operating. When I do good, my boss never remembers. When I do wrong, he never forgets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative." A voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup du jour, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "what is this?" "Why, it''s bean soup," she replied. "I don''t care what it has been," he sputtered. "What is it now?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so skinny she had to run arround the shower to get wet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To make a long story short, well, it helps if the boss walks in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I put a blank tape in my TV and turned the volume all the way up. The mime next door went crazy and called the cops.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grow some dope... plant a man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A really really drunk man stumbled out of a local bar and right into the nun. Quickly the man punched the nun right in the face. Stunned the nun tried to run away, but the drunk just ran after her and pushed her to the ground. The drunk then proceeded to kick the nun repeatedly until the nun was begging for mercy. The drunk leans down and looks at the nun and says, "Not so tough now, eh Batman?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two robins were sitting in a tree. "I''m really hungry," said the first one. "Let''s fly down and find some lunch." They flew down to the ground and found a nice plot of newly plowed ground that was full of worms. They ate and ate and ate till they could eat no more. "I''m so full, I don''t think I can fly back up into the tree," said the first one. "Let''s just lay back here and bask in the warm sun," said the second. "OK," said the first. So they plopped down, basking in the sun. No sooner than they had fallen asleep, when a big fat tomcat came by and gobbled them up. As the cat sat washing his face after his meal, he thought... "I JUST LOVE BASKIN ROBINS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Hillary are at the first baseball game of the season. The umpire walks up to the VIP section and yells something, suddenly Clinton grabs Hillary by the collar and throws her over the side and onto the field. The stunned umpired shouts. "No, Mr. President! I said, ''Throw the first PITCH!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An 8-year-old girl went to her dad, who was working in the yard. She asked him, "Daddy, what is sex?" The father was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decides that if she is old enough to ask the question, then she is old enough to get a straight answer. He proceeded to tell her all about the "birds and the bees." When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open. The father asked her, "Why did you ask this question?" The little girl replied, "Mom told me to tell you that dinner would be ready in just a couple of secs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reaching the end of a job interview, the interviewer asked a young engineer, "What starting salary were you thinking about?" The Engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5 weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Vampire bats are in a cave, both very hungry. The first bat goes out looking for some food. He comes back later with nothing. The second bat tries not long afterwords. 5 minutes later he returns, blood all over his face! "Wow!" said the first bat "You must''ve had a big meal, where did you get that?" "Well, can you see that large redwood over there?" "Yes" replies the first bat. "Well I bloody well didn''t."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('alarm clock, n. a device for waking up people who don''t have small children', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Penguins mate for life. This is not surprising, as they all look the same. It''s not like they have to wait and wonder if someone better will come along!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eve, in the Garden of Eden, called out, "Lord, I have a problem." And the Lord said, "What''s the matter, Eve?" "I know You created me and this beautiful garden. But I''m lonely - and I''m sick of eating apples." "Well, in that case," replied the Almighty, "I''ll create a man for you." "What''s a man?" "He''s a flawed creature with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to listen. But he''s big and fast and muscular. He''ll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball and hunting animals." "Sounds great!" replied Eve. "There''s one condition," added the Lord. "You''ll have to let him believe that I made him first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the director of the Department of Motor Vehicles who resigned on Tuesday? He tried to resign on Monday, but discovered he''d been standing in the wrong line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the scientists who crossed a porcupine with a sheep? They got an animal that knits its own sweaters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The assistant curator of the musuem came to the head curator with a couple of problems. "Sir, the mummy is damp and getting mouldy. And the white mouse in the maze exhibit has developed dry skin." The head curator thought for a minute, then advised, "Put your mummy where your mouse is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so dumb, she tried to spell out the alphabet with M&M''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What possible reason can you have for acquitting this defendant? the judge shouted at the jury. "Insanity, Your Honour," replied the foreman. "All TWELVE of you?" bellowed the judge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please, God, the man prayed, "you know me. I''m always praying to you, yet I''ve had nothing but bad luck, misery and despair. Look at the butcher next door. He''s never prayed in his life, and he enjoys prosperity, health and happiness. How come a believer like me is always in trouble, and he''s always doing so well?" "Because," a voice boomed from the heavens, "the butcher doesn''t bug me, that''s why!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Opera: where somebody gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, sings.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Couple of things you oughta know Firstly, when I''m born, I''m black!! When I grow up, I''m black When I get sick, I''m black When I go out in the sun, I''m black When I''m cold, I''m black And when I get scared, Gee, I''m black And When I die, I''m still black But you white fella... When you born, you pink When you grow up, you white When you get sick, you green When you go out in the sun, you red When you get cold, you go blue When you get scared, you yellow And when you die, you purple And YOU got the cheek to call ME coloured??!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Eskimos sitting in their boat were chilly; but when they lit a fire in the boat, it sank, proving once and for all that you can''t have your kayak and heat it too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman had twins, and gave them up for adoption. One of them went to a family in Egypt and was named Amal. The other went to a family in Spain, and they named him Juan. Years later, Juan sent a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she told her husband that she wished that she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responded, "But they''re twins. If you''ve seen Juan, you''ve seen Amal."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama was so Ugly as a child your granddaddy had to put a pork chop round her neck so the dog would play with her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What two things in the air can make a blonde pregnant? Her Legs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was sitting outside a church playing with sulphuric acid. The priest came up to him and said "Child why are you playing with sulphuric acid? Thats dangerous! I''ve got some holy water inside that is much more powerful." Little Johnny relied "How come?" "Well last week I splashed some holy water on Mrs.Wilson''s tummy and she passed a baby!" said the priest proudly. "Thats nothing," retorted Little Johnny "I spashed some sulphuric acid on my dog''s balls and he passed a Ferrari!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a good egg and a good fart? You can''t beat a good fart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blind Hookers eh? You''ve got to hand it to them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a women are making love for the first time. "Cor what a small organ!" the women sniggered "It may be small, darling" replied the man "but it''s never played in a Cathedral before!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to open a beer? None it should be open by the time she brings it to you. Why are women''s feet so small? So they can stand closer to the sink. How much does it cost to fix a woman''s watch? Nothing, theres a clock on the oven. Your wife is at the front door yelling at you to open the door for her and your dog is at the back door barking his head off to be let in. Which one do you let in first? The dog, he shuts up when you let him in the house. What''s worse than a Male Chauvinist? A woman who won''t shut up and do what a man tells her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four Catholic women are sitting in a cafe sipping their tea, talking about their great sons. Soon it begins as a contest to see who has the best son. The first woman proudly declares, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room people call him ''Father." The second woman replies even more proudly, "My son is a bishop, when he walks into a room people call him ''My Grace." The third woman thinking she wins replies, "My son is a Cardinal! When he walks into a room people say, ''My Eminence." The fourth woman says nothing but sips her tea quietly. The three women stare at her and then ask her what is so special about her son. With a smug look on her face she replies, "My son is a 6'' 5" muscular man, with a chiseled jaw and arms as big as pipes. And when he walks into a room all the woman say, ''Oh My God."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman''s breasts are like a child''s toys. They are meant for the child - but the husband is the one that usually ends up playing with them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three vampires go into a bar. The bartender asks the first one, "What can I getcha?" The first vampire replies, "I''ll have a pint of blood". The bartender then asks the second vampire, and he too orders a pint of blood. The bartender turns to the third vampire and asks, "What about you?" The third vampire says, "I think I''ll have a pint of plasma." The bartender says, "OK, so that will be two Bloods and one Blood Lite."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three well known rings to marriage: Engagement ring, Wedding ring, and suffering!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s like Humpty Dumpty.... first she gets humped, then she gets dumped!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you don''t like my driving, stay out of the bus shelters!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overheard at an exhibit in the science museum: "It says here that oxygen was discovered over two hundred years ago." "Wow! What did people breathe before that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and son were washing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the family room. Suddenly, there was a crash of breaking dishes, then complete silence. The girl looked at her dad and said, "It was Mom." "How do you know?" "She didn''t say anything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From the instruction manual for the first stewardesses (in 1930): Keep the clock and altimeter wound up. Carry a railroad timetable in case the plane is grounded. Warn the passengers against throwing their cigars and cigarettes out the windows. Keep an eye on passengers when they go to the lavatory to be sure they don''t mistakenly go out the emergency exit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two guys at a bar. One of them was rich and the other was poor. They both start talking and they find out their anniversary is on the same day, which is tomorrow. Poor guy- "What did you get your wife?" Rich Guy- "I got her a diamond ring and a Mercedes Benz." Poor guy- "Why did you give her those??" Rich Guy- "Because if she doesn''t like the ring she can run the car off a cliff and go screw herself. What did you get your wife?" Poor guy- "A pair of slippers and a dildo" Rich Guy- "Why did you give her those??" Poor guy- "Because if she doesn''t like the slippers she can go screw herself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? Through a catalogue!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the woman who poured margaritas in her birdbath? Enough tequila mockingbird.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a stockbroker''s office and said to the receptionist, "I just won the lottery, and I want to open an account with your %**!&%*! company." Heads turned in shock at hearing the man''s language. "I''m sorry, but we don''t allow that kind of talk here," the receptionist said. "You''ll have to leave." "I told you I want to open an account with this %**!&%*! company," the man insisted. Suddenly the manager came out. "What''s all the swearing about?" he asked. "I just won $12 million and I want to open an account with your %**!&%*! company," the man replied. "Oh, I see," said the manager. "And are these %**!&%*! people giving you a hard time?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Chips. Chips who? Chips Ahoy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb, she spent twenty minutes staring at a orange juice bottle because it said, ''Concentrate''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you kill a blond? A. Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when she got on the scale it said To be Continued!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so dirty she has to sneak up on the water', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma such a bitch, PMS cheers her up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale she screwed it to the bottom of the floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new dictionary for masochists? It has all the words, but they''re not in alphabetical order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tearful woman phoned a reducing salon to wail that her husband had just given her a lovely present and she couldn''t get into it. The operator gave her an appointment and added, "Don''t worry, madam, we''ll have you wearing that dress in no time." "Dress?" the matron sobbed. "It''s a Porsche!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never ever take a sleeping pill and a laxative in the same night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender tells him the price is $3. The man pulls out a $20 bill and hands it to the bartender. The bartender replies, "Sorry I can''t accept that." The man then pulls out a $10 bill and hands it to the bartender. The bartender refuses to accept it. The man finally pulls out a $5 bill and gives it to the bartender. The bartender once again refuses to accept it. When the man asks the bartender why he won''t accept any of the bills the man is giving him, the bartender replies, "Sorry sir, this is a singles bar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar down in Alabama and orders a beer. The whole bar is looking at the man curiously as he sits down. The bartender looks at his nice suit and tie and asks him if he''s from around here. The man replies, "No sir, I''m from Pennslyvania." The bartender asks the man what he does for a living up in Pennyslyvania. The man replies, "I am a Taxidermist." The bartender slowly asks, "What is a Taxidermist?" The man answers back, "Oh, I just mount animals." The bartender grins wide and yells to the whole bar, "It''s OK Boys!! He''s one of us!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d had a pretty hectic day with my four-year-old. When bed-time finally came, I laid down the law: "We''re putting on your p.j.s, brushing your teeth, and reading ONE book. Then it''s lights out!" Her arms went around my neck in a gentle embrace, and she said, "We learned in Sunday school about little boys and girls who don''t have mommies and daddies." Even after I''d been such a grouch, I thought, she was still grateful to have me. I felt tears begin to well up in my eyes, and then she whispered, "Maybe you could go be THEIR mom?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, I''d like you to evaluate my 13 year-old son. "OK: He''s most likely suffering from a transient psychosis with an intermittent rage disorder, punctuated by episodic radical mood swings, but his prognosis is good for full recovery." "How can you say all that without even meeting him?" "I thought you said he''s 13?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so dumb she had to call 411 to get the number for 911.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama so dumb, her favorite color is clear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama so big, fat, and clumsey, when she tried to get to Wal-Mart, she stumbled over K-Mart and landed right on Target.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a blonde busy? (see below) How do you keep a blonde busy? (see above)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dumb blonde, a smart blonde, and Santa Claus were invited to a party. On the way, the dumb blonde''s car broke down. The smart blonde missed the bus. Two of Santa Claus'' reindeer ran away. Who got to the party first? The dumb blonde, because the other two don''t exist!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A local psychic hotline opened up a new number especially for frogs, called "The Psychic Frog-line." A frog called, wanting to know his future. "You will meet a beautiful young girl," predicted the psychic. "This is great!" said the frog. "Where will I meet her? At a party? At the pond?" "No," replied the psychic. "Next semester in a biology class."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many paranoids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What exactly do you mean by that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was recently fired from her cashier job, because she kept stealing money from the register. She went looking for work the next day. A few days later, she came to a man who needed someone. "I''m here for the paint job", the blonde said eagerly. "Alright. Take this paint and brush, and go paint my backyard porch", replied the man. The blonde immediately started painting. After she was done, she decided to do a second coat. When she was finished, she went to the man to get her pay. "I finished it, and did a second coating too! By the way, that''s not a Porsche, it''s a new BMW".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How was copper wire invented? Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mushroom walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender, not wanting to serve a mushroom, says "Uh uh, I''m not serving no mushroom." "Aw, come on - I''m a fungi!" the mushroom replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was standing in front of a vending machine. She put in a dollar, pushed a button and a coke came out. She put in another dollar, pushed a different button and an iced tea came out. The blonde kept doing this, until the man behind her became impatient. "Excuse me, can I just get a drink, THEN you can continue whatever you''re doing???" "No way!" exclaimed the blonde. "I''m not giving up this machine when I''m winning!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cat''s dictionary. Purring: Sound of a cat manufacturing cuteness. Purrverse: Poem about a strange kitty. Purranoia: The fear that your cat is up to something. Human Being: Automatic door opener for cats. Purrpetual: Everlasting love for domesticated felines. Purrson: A male kitty. Purrpetual motion: A kitty playing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women were sitting beside each other in the airport. "Where are you flying to?", the woman on the right asked. With an attitude, the other replied "You should never end a sentece with the word ''to''". "Ok", said the woman on the right. "Where are you flying to, bitch?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to a psychiatrist and explained his problem. "Two weeks ago I had a dream that I was a tippee. Then, the next day, I dreamt I was a wigwam. In my next dream, I was a teepee again, and this has been happening the whole too weeks! What''s wrong with me, Doc?". "It''s simple. You''re just two tents".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two scientists were discussing their latest behaviour-modification research. "We''ve started something new," said the first scientist. "For some of our more dangerous experiments, we''re now using lawyers." "Lawyers?" questioned her colleague. "But we''ve always used rats." "Well, you know how it is. You get so attached to the rats."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister gave birth in a state-of-the-art delivery room. It was so high tech that the baby came out cordless!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many car salesmen does it take to change a light bulb? A. I''m just going to work this out on my calculator, and I think you''re going to be pleasantly surprised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t ghosts make good magicians? You can see right through them!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: Doctor doctor, J keep seeing doubles! Doctor: Please take a seat. Patient: Which one?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time, when I was a kid, I forgot to do my homework, so I stole someone else''s and turned it in. After class, the teacher pulled me over. She asked why I didn''t turn in the homework. I said, guess I forgot to change the name on it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had four cappuccinos at one time. I was bouncing off the walls. Good thing they were padded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t mean to agitate the police officer. Water balloons are good fun, but he had to get all mad. Then he grabbed that metal baton thingy. That''s a lot less fun than a water balloon. I even said "think fast!" He didn''t say that to me when he used the baton on my face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is boxing a sport? If I beat someone up in an alley and someone sees it, I get arrested. If I beat someone up in an arena where thousands see it happen, I get cheered. I''ve done both. I like the alley better though.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Existentialists does it take to change a light bulb? What light bulb?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so big that when pirates see her they say, "LAND HO!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mom was out walking with her 4 year old daughter. the child picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. The mother asked her not to do that. "Why?" "Because it''s been laying outside and is dirty and probably has germs." At this point, the child looked at her mom with total admiration and asked, "Wow! How do you know all this stuff?" "Uh," the mom was thinking quickly, everyone knows this stuff, "Um, it''s on the mommy test. You have to know it, or they don''t let you be a mommy." "Oh." They walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but the child was evidently pondering this new information. "I get it!" she beamed. "Then if you flunk, you have to be the daddy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so dumb, she thought that a Playstation was a day care place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Madam Madam who? Madam foot''s caught in the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat that when she went bungee jumping, she took down the whole bridge with her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat that she rents herself out as a jumping castle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? July July who? July like Bill Clinton', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day on a farm a farmer gets a new rooster and puts it in the hen house. The new rooster is talking to the old rooster and the old rooster says, "Just let me have 2 chickens and I''ll leave you alone." The young rooster says, "No old man these are my chickens." So the old rooster says, "Why don''t we have a race around the chicken coop to see who deserves the chickens?" The young rooster figuring he is faster agrees, and even desides to give the old rooster a 15 second head start. So when the race begins the old rooster takes off and 15 seconds later the young rooster begins running. By the time the roosters round the first bend the young rooster has almost caught the old rooster. Then as the go by the house "BANG" the farmer fires his shoot gun and says, "Damn, third gay rooster this month."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Famous Last Words "Oh come on, nobody''s died from this in years." "I saw it on Jackass last night." "My dad did it when he was a kid." "Yes, I''m sure that the power is off." "It''ll only hurt for a couple of days." "See, I''m not afraid of heights."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Famous Last Words: "The gun isn''t loaded, ok?" "Yes, I double checked." "This fuse should give us plenty of time." "I don''t think he has a gun." "This is a very safe neighborhood!" "I am 100% sure of the blast radius."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is off a Coast Guard bumper sticker: Support Search and Rescue: GET LOST!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My college doesn''t allow pets in my dorm, so when I got a kitten I had the guys in my dorm refer to him as "the Book" to avoid suspicion. One morning, as I carried the kitten out to my car in a crate, my girlfriend stopped me and asked, "where are you taking the Book?" "She''s getting Spayed today," I said. "Hmm..." she said. "I guess that means no sequels!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Darn those pushy metric system advocates! Give them 2.54 cm., and they''ll take 1.6093 km!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Famous Last Words "We''ll be safe here, trust me." "Who cares about the severe weather warning, those forecasters are always wrong anyway." "We''re not as high up as it looks, here I''ll show you." "Who cares about those heart condition warnings anyway, I wanna ride this thing!" "My friend did this a while ago. I don''t know how it turned out, I haven''t seen him since." "It''s just a slight tingle." "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!!!???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FAMOUS LAST WORDS "One sec, I''ve got to go the bathroom!" :) "It doesn''t hurt... that... bad..." "This stuff works just as well!" "It looks like it''s coming right towards us!" "Here, let me handle this, forget the cops!" "I read this in a ''how-to'' magazine once." "No I''m not a skydiver, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express Last Night." "Proper equipment is for rich people." "I don''t know. Let''s find out!" "I did it in a video game last night." "Did you hear that? Sounded like something big. Where''s that flashlight?" And finally... "OH SHIT!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I broke in to a gun shop last week. I didn''t know that the owner lived on-site. He must have spent every night for the last ten years thinking of what he would do to the poor, hapless soul who would try to break in. I pointed my gun at him and he held up a grenade as he ran at me. I should be able to breath again in a few years. The old shopkeeper is dead, but, man, he got a hell of a laugh in before he left the world, Kamikaze style.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, her Inuit name is Denali!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb, she thought a GameCube was a Rubik''s puzzle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, when she jumps in the ocean, people head for higher ground.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo self-centered momma is so fat, the world really does revolve around her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, your family photos have to be shot from a plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat and lazy, that her hair-do has been turned into a National Forest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama so stupid, she got fired at the M & M factory because she threw out all the W''s!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 people were asked to find the "hardest" word in the dictionary. One person found the word "happiness". One person found the word"photosynthesis". The last person found the word "dick".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, blondes usually screw in cars!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do railroad tracks and blondes have in common? They are both laid all over America!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a blonde to laugh on Friday? Tell her a joke on Monday!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde do when she wakes up? She goes home!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is like a door knob, everyone gets a turn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Little boy blue. Little Boy Blue who? Micheal Jackson!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are constipated people so mean and rude? ..because they don''t give a crap!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do hookers and bungee jump cords have in common? They''re both cheap, fast and if the rubber breaks, your dead!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so old that when I told her to act her age, she died!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob and Bo are hunting. Bob had a sever case of diarrhea so he decided to stay and rest up. Bo goes out and kills a big deer and guts it. He then thinks it would be funny if he laid the deers guts in Bob''s sleeping bag so he does and goes to sleep. Then he wakes up the next morning and see''s that Bob and the guts are gone. Then he notices Bob and asks how''s he feeling. Bob says, "My diarrhea was so bad I crapped my guts out but with God''s grace and these two fingers I got them all back in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Timmy had been having a hard time in math class and got an ''F'' on almost all of his report cards. His mom thought he''d be better off if he went to a private Catholic school. The very first day of school Timmy came home, went straight to his room and began working until he finally just fell asleep on his bed. This continued for a long time until he got his first report card from the new school and his mom was so proud when he got an ''A'' in Math. She said, "I knew you''d do better in a private school." Then she says how did you do so well?" and Timmy replies, "When I walked in and saw the guy nailed to the plus sign I knew they meant business."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it sounds like a duck, has a beak like a duck and feet like a duck, and swims like a duck, you still better make sure that it ain''t a platypus!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a Papal audience, a business man approached the Pope and made this offer: Change the last line of the Lord''s prayer from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our daily chicken." and KFC will donate 10 million dollars to Catholic charities. The Pope declined. Two weeks later the man approached the Pope again. This time with a 50 million dollar offer. Again the Pope delcined. A month later the man offers 100 million, this time the Pope accepts. At a meeting of the Cardinals, the Pope announces his decision in the good news/bad news format. "The good news is... that we have 100 million dollars for charities. The bad news is that we lost the Wonder Bread account!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving along an old dirt road when he sees this giant mud hole, but, he is not quick enough to swerve and avoid it. He climbs out of his car and walks along the road until he reaches a farm house. He goes in and asks the farmer to help him out of the hole. The farmer agrees and between the two of them they get the car out in about 15 minutes. The man offers to pay the farmer and asks how much he should give. The farmer says, "$200 should cover it because it took me a whole day." The man gets angry and shouts, "All day! It hardly took you 15 minutes." The farmer says, "Yea, but I had to fill the hole with mud too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks his dad,"Dad, what is 6.9?" The dad answers, "69 interrupted by a period!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Santa have such big balls? Because he only comes once a year!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid that you sold your car for gas money!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One blonde was so dumb she got locked in a bathroom and pissed her self!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is like a turtle. If either one is on their back, they are screwed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circular room and tell her there is a vibrator in the corner. How does a blonde confuse you? When she comes out and says she found it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blonde jokes are there? One. The rest are all true stories.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a blonde and the internet? Not everyone has been on the internet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time 5 Indians captured 3 Americans and they said to go get fruit or they''ll beat them up. The 1st guy comes back with apples and the Indians tell him to shove 10 apples up his butt. He says "Ok - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5..." then he dies and goes to Heaven. The 2nd guy comes back with oranges and he was told the same. "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9..." then he bursts out laughing and laughs himself to death and he goes to Heaven. The 2 guys meet in Heaven and the 1st one says "why did you stop? you were so close!" "Because I saw the 3rd guy, he had pineapples!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you fit 4 gay guys on a chair? Turn it upside down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Osama Bin Laden and crabs have in common. They both irritate bush!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 men were out camping. At about 3:00 one man had to go to the bathroom. There were no toilets around and the men had no toilet paper! The man took a crap in the forest, but then had noting to wipe his butt with. He asked his friend what to do, and his friends said to wipe his butt with a 1 dollar bill. 5 minutes later the man came back with crap all over his hands. The friend asked what happened and the man said, "I didn''t have a 1 dollar bill, so I used 4 quarters!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is grosser than gross? When a midget walks by and says your hair smells nice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the name for a bandaid on a pumpkin? A pumpkin patch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid, you tried to kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so stupid you tried to kill a fish by drowning it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so stupid you invented glow in the dark sun glasses!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb you invented water proof tea bags!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat, when you went outside wearing a yellow dress everybody called "TAXI"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly, you can''t even turn on a lightbulb!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat that everybody has to talk behind your back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so ugly, when she went to go rob a bank she didn''t have to use no gun, she just reached her head over the counter and said put the money in the bag!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, I went to the shooting gallery at the fair, one with the smiling clowns. I aimed and fired. Imagine my reaction when the target started yelling obscenities and charged. "WOW! These fairs are really getting high-tech," I thought. Just to impress the girls watching, I held my ground and continued firing. Pretty soon, he lost all of his teeth, but he still kept coming. And that was some realistic blood! I aimed up at the forehead, and the target dropped like a rock. A security guard walked up to me and said, "How do you feel? You just killed a carnie, you sicko!" "Wow, real carnival people!" I said, "I gotta get some of those for my shotgun at home! Carnies are cheaper than paper targets, and you don''t have to worry about the guilt from killing the precious trees!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A city mouse had a country mouse stay for the weekend, and spent the whole time offering urban advice. On the last evening of the country mouse''s visit, they were dining in the kitchen when in came the largest cat the country mouse had ever seen. "Don''t panic," said the town mouse, "Leave this to me." Marching up to the cat she said, "Bow wow wow wow! The cat turned and ran from the room. "How did you do that?" asked the country mouse. "Like I told you," said the town mouse, "it pays to learn a second language."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three guys on the C.N. tower and the tour guide told them that if either one of them could throw their watches over the side and run down and catch it, they would win 1 million dollars. The first guy threw his watch over and when he got down, it was shattered into a million pieces. The same thing happened to the second guy. The third guy threw his watch over, went home and got a shower, had his dinner, and came back and caught his watch. The all wondered how he did it and he said, " I set it two hours slow"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The weather was very hot, so this man wanted desperately take a dive in the nearby lake. He didn''t bring his swimming outfit, but who cared? He was all alone. So he undressed and got into the water. After some delightful minutes of cool swimming, a pair of old ladies walked onto the shore in his direction. He panicked, got out of the water and grabbed a bucket, which laid on the sandy beach. He held the bucket in front of his private parts and sighed with relief. The ladies got nearby and looked at him. He felt awkward and wanted to move. Then one of the ladies said, "You know, I have a special gift, I can read minds." "Impossible," said the embarrassed man, "You really know what I think?" "Yes," the lady replied, ''I know that you think that the bucket you''re holding has a bottom in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night Aggie says to George "Think I''ll go to bingo the night George... when I''m gone you make sure the youngsters get in and go to bed" Now George and Aggie had thirteen kids the last time they counted. So when Aggie went off to bingo, George went out and made the youngsters come in and get to bed. For about three or four hours, one little boy kept crying and crying, so George takes off up with a split and hits the floor, the little boy cries harder and harder. George sputters out "What are you bawling about?" The little boy replies "I want to go to me own home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?" The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don''t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I''ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?" The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied... "My wife''s first husband."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde is getting on an elevator and meets a gentleman on board. "T.G.I.F." she says. "S.H.I.T" was his reply. Puzzled she replied "T.G.I.F" The gentleman was getting a little disturbed the the remark, so he says again. "S.H.I.T.". The Blonde leans over and whispers "THANK GOD IT''S FRIDAY". The gentleman responses with "SORRY, HONEY IT''S THURSDAY".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys own a zoo. To their angst their lone female gorilla goes into heat. Knowing she will be violent if not looked after they take her to a vet for advice. He says she needs to be bred by a male gorilla. Knowing they can''t find a male they weigh their options. One says to the other, hey that guy that cleans the cages is kind of crazy, maybe he''ll do it. They ask him if he''d do it for $500. He asks for some time to think about it. The next day he comes back to the guys and says he''ll do it on three conditions. 1) No commitments, once it''s done it''s over. 2) If there is any kids I''m not responsible. The two say O.K. no problem, what''s your third condition? Well he says it''s going to take me a few weeks to come up with the 500 dollars......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat, when she sat on a quarter, boogers came out of George Washington''s nose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Lawyer name his daughter? Answer: Sue', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you go skinny dippin'' if you''re fat? Is it possible to fight on a luv seat? If you drink tap water can you tap dance? by:lilpapa92', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn''t getting any respect. Later that morning he went to a local card and novelty shop and bought a small sign that read, "I''m the Boss". He then taped it to his office door. Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said. "Your wife called, she wants her sign back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around. "What the hell do you think you''re doing?" "I''m a chiropractor, and I''m just keeping in practice while I''m waiting in line." "Well, I''m a lawyer, but you don''t see me screwing the guy in front of me, do you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. The female always makes the rules. 2. The rules can change without notice. 3. Males can''t know the rules. 4. If the female suspects that the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some of the rules. 5. The female never bears the blame for being wrong. 6. If the female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something that the male did or said which was wrong. 7. If rule 6 applies, the male must apologize for causing the misunderstanding. 8. The female can change her mind. 9. The male must never change his mind without the consent of the female. 10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time. 11. The male must always remain calm unless the female wants him to be angry or upset. 12. The female must never let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset. 13. If the female has PMS, there are no rules. 14. The male cannot diagnose PMS.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde take a right into the ditch? Her blinker was on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister." Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town, doing what boys and girls do on back roads some distance from town. Things were getting hot and heavy when the girl stopped the boy. "I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I''m actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex," she said. The boy just looked at her for a couple of seconds, but then reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing. After the cigarette, the boy just sat in the driver''s seat looking out the window. "Why aren''t we going anywhere?" asked the girl. "Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I''m actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a blonde busy on a rainy day? Tell her to touch the rainbow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting hunter asked, "When did you bag him?" The host said, "That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my wife." "What''s he stuffed with?" asked the visiting hunter, and the host said, "My wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes rented a boat and fished in a lake every day. One day they caught 30 fish. One blonde said to her friend, "Mark this spot so that we can come back here again tomorrow." The next day, when they were driving to rent the boat, the same blonde asked her friend, "Did you mark that spot?" Her friend replied, "Yeah, I put a big ''X'' on the bottom of the boat." The first one said, "You stupid fool! What if we don''t get that same boat today!?!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid that when you send a FAX you put a stamp on it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men were trekking through the desert and came across a magician. The magician was standing at the top of a slide. The magician said, ''''You may each go down the slide, asking for a drink. When you reach the bottom of the slide you shall land in a huge glass of that drink." The first man went down yelling, ''''Beeeerrr!!!'''' Plop! He landed in a glass of beer. The second guy went down the slide yelling,''''lemonadeee!!!'''' Plop! He landed in a glass of lemonade. The third guy went down the slide yelling ''''wheeeeeeeee!!!''''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There''s too much fraternizing with the enemy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old preacher was dying. He sent a message for his IRS agent and his Lawyer (both church members), to come to his home. When they arrived, they were ushered up to his bedroom. As they entered the room, the preacher held out his hands and motioned for them to sit on each side of the bed. The preacher grasped their hands, sighed contentedly, smiled and stared at the ceiling. For a time, no one said anything. Both the IRS agent and Lawyer were touched and flattered that the old preacher would ask them to be with him during his final moment. They were also puzzled because the preacher had never given any indication that he particularly liked either one of them. Finally, the Lawyer asked, "Preacher, why did you ask the two of us to come?" The old preacher mustered up some strength, then said weakly, " Jesus died between two thieves, and that''s how I want to go, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his friend are out camping and the first one needs to go to the bathroom and they have no toliet paper so he asks his friend what to do. His friend says just wipe it with your hand and smack it on a rock. So the man does so and smacks his hand on a rock and it hurts him really bad, so to reduce the pain he sucks on his hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for three shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What happened?" The guy replies, "I just found out my younger brother is gay." He finish''s his shots and leaves. The next day he comes back and orders five shots and the bartender asks, " What happened this time?" The man replies, "I just found out my older brother is gay and I always looked up to him." The man finish''s his shots and leaves. The next day he comes back and orders twelve shots. The bartender says, "Doesn''t anybody in your family like women?" The man replies, " Yea, my mom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, she fell in love and broke it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows were talking in the field. One cow says, "Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that''s going around?" The other cow answers, "Yeah, makes you glad we''re penguins, doesn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a BMW & a porcupine? A porcupine has pricks on the outside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear and a rabbit are walking together and they find a magic lamp. They decide to rub it and a genie comes out. The genie says, "Thank you for releasing me I will give you both 3 wishes." The bear thinks and says, "I wish all the other bears in this forest were lady bears." Then the rabbit says, "I wish for a little motorcycle that is perfect for me." The genie grants both wishes. Then the bear decides his second will be for all the bears in the country besides him to be female The rabbit wishes for a little helmet that fits his head and has holes for his ears. Then the bear says, "Why not have all the bears in the world be girls." Then the rabbit, thinking quickly, says, "I wish the bear was gay," and speeds off on his motorbike.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Midtown Manhattan a police officer arrives at the scene of what appears to be a bad accident. A pedestrian is lying in the crosswalk. The driver of the car under suspicion says, "I swear I didn''t touch him! I saw him at the crosswalk, I came to a complete stop, motioned for him to cross, and he fainted."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The movie producer was planning his next blockbuster - an action docudrama about famous composers. So he set up a meeting with Jean-Claude Van Damme, Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger and offered them the chance to select which famous musicians they''d portray. "Chopin has always been my favorite," said Van Damme. "That''s the part for me." "I''ve always admired Mozart," Stallone said. "I''d love to play him." The producer turned to Schwarzenegger. "And you, Arnold? Who do you want to be?" There was a long silence, then he replied, "I''ll be Bach."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sky was dark the moon was high all alone just her and I Her hair was so soft Her eyes so blue I knew just what she wanted to do her skin so soft her legs so fine I ran my fingers down her spine I didn''t know how But I tried my best I started by placing my hand on her breast I remember my fear My fast beating heart but slowly she spread her legs apart, and when I did it I felt no shame and all at once the white stuff came At last it''s finished it''s all over now my first time ever at milking a cow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That sometimes when you cry, no one sees your tears. Sometimes when you''re sad, no one understands your pain. Sometimes when you''re happy, no one sees your smile. But you just have to fart once, and EVERYBODY knows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the sailor who died, and wanted to be buried at sea by his 5 blonde daughters? His daughters all drowned digging the grave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple is having a nice dinner at a local restaurant, having a good time telling blonde jokes. Suddenly a blonde approached them and slapped her hand down on the table. She angrily tells them that she can take a blonde joke as well as the next person, but it isn''t nice to keep bashing them in public. The couple apologize and changes the topic. A few minutes later the woman needs to go to the restroom, so she goes off, and she is followed by the blonde. After 10 minutes the blonde comes out frusturated, and storms out the front door. The woman calmly comes out and sits down at her table. The man asks what happened in there. The woman replies, "Well, as I was washing my hands, the blonde came in and pulled a razor on me!" The man replies, "Oh my god, what happened?" The woman bursts out laughing, "Well, nothing, luckily she didn''t find a place to plug it in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so poor I went in your front door and came out the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the boy eat his homework? Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall. The owner asks the clerk, "What''s with that guy over there by the wall?" The clerk says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn''t find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative." The owner says, "You idiot! You can''t treat a cough with laxatives!" The clerk says, "Oh yeah? Look at him, he''s afraid to cough!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a psychiatrist''s office covered only in Saran Wrap. He says to the doctor, "I''ve felt so weird lately, Doc, can you tell me what''s wrong?" The doctor replied, "Well, I can clearly see your nuts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you slip into something comfortable. Like a coma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I haven''t seen anyone run that fast since Twinkies went on sale.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blondes are like a rollercoaster, everyone gets a ride!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newly married man was discussing his honeymoon. He says to his buddy at lunch, "Last night, I rolled over, tapped my beautiful young wife on the shoulder, gave her a wink, and we had ourselves a performance! Later that night, about 2 o''clock, I rolled over, gave my sweetie a nudge, and we had ourselves another performance. Well, being so newly married and not yet tired of the task, I waited quietly in bed while my beauty slept until I couldn''t wait any longer. It was 4 o''clock when I gave her a little nudge. She opened her blue eyes and smiled sweetly. We immediately had ourselves a rehearsal." "A rehearsal?" his buddy asks, "Don''t you mean a performance?" "No, because a rehearsal is when nobody comes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a golf tour in Ireland , Tiger Woods drives his BMW into a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside. The pump attendant, obviously knows nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Irish manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is. "Top of the mornin'' to yer, sir" says the attendant. Tiger nods a quick "hello" and bends forward to pick up the nozzle. As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground. "What are those?" asks the attendant. "They''re called tees" replies Tiger. "Well, what on the good earth are they for?" inquires the Irishman. "They''re for resting my balls on when I''m driving" says Tiger. "Frickin ''eck" says the Irishman, "BMW thinks of everything!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Irishman sitting in your backyard? Paddy O''Furniture', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tutor who tooted the flute Tried to teach two young tooters to toot Said the two to the tutor Is it harder to toot or To tutor two tooters to toot?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Broccoli, while not exoccoli, Is within an inach of being spinach.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s worse than raining cats and dogs? A. Hailing taxicabs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl got on her grandpa''s lap and said, "Did God make me?" "Yes," the grandpa replied. "Did God make you, too?" "Yes," the grandpa said. "Well," the little girl said, while running her fingers down his wrinkles and looking at his thinning hair, "He sure is doing a better job nowadays."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 7-year-old and his 4-year-old brother are upstairs in their bedroom. The 7-year-old is explaining that it is high time that the two of them begin swearing. When his little brother responds enthusiastically, the 7-year old says, ''''When we go downstairs for breakfast this morning, I''ll say ''hell'' and you say ''ass''.'''' The 4-year-old happily agrees. As the two boys are seating themselves at the breakfast table, their mother walks in and asks her older son what he would like to eat for breakfast. The 7-year-old replies, ''''Aw hell, Mom, I''ll just have some Cheerios." The surprised mother reacts quickly and whacks him one. The boy runs upstairs, bawling and rubbing his behind. With a sterner note in her voice, the mother then asks the younger son, ''''And what would YOU like for breakfast?'''' ''''I don''t know,'''' the 4-year-old blubbers, ''''but you can bet your ASS it''s not gonna be Cheerios!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, "Mommy, can little girls have babies?" "No," said his mom, "Of course not." Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, "It''s okay, we can play that game again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde get pulled over by the police? A: Her headlights weren''t working, so she was flashing people', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the accident at the mall? There was a power outage and a group of blondes was stuck on the escalator for 3 hours!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the first day of college, and time for the usual ''authoritative declaration of the not to be broken rules''. The principal, in typical intimidating fashion, addressed the students: "The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students. The male dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all the female students". The principal, sensing he was on a roll, stood tall and powerful as he covered the punishments for breaking the rules. "Be wary, anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20. It doesn''t stop there though, anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60. Being caught a third time will cost you $180. Are there any questions?" "How much for a season pass?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the new sushi bar that caters exclusively to lawyers? It''s called, Sosumi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call one lawyer thrown off a bridge into a river? A: Pollution. Q: What do you call all the lawyers thrown off a bridge? A: Solution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a lawyer and he was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, "You''re beautiful!" and then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that so she stayed by his side. A couple minutes later his eyes fluttered open and he said "You''re cute!" Well, the wife was disappointed because instead of "beautiful" it was "cute." She said, "What happened to ''beautiful?''" His reply was, "The drugs are wearing off!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Good girls loosen a few buttons when it''s hot. -Bad girls make it hot by loosening a few buttons. -Good girls only own one credit card and rarely use it. -Bad girls only own one bra and rarely use it. -Good girls wax their floors. -Bad girls wax their bi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a father sent his kid to bed. Five minutes later the boy screamed, ''''Dad! Can you get me a glass of water!?!'''' ''''No. You had your chance.'''' A minute later the boy screamed ''''Dad!! Can you get me a glass of water?'''' ''''No. You had your chance. Next time you ask I''ll come up there and spank you.'''' ''''Dad! When you come up to spank me can you bring me a glass of water?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy with two black eyes walks into church one Sunday. The priest notices him and is very concerned. "What happened, my child?" "I was singing in the choir, Father, and I noticed that the girl in front of me had a wedgie, so I pulled it out, and she punched me in the eye." "Okay; how did you get the other black eye?" "Well, I thought I''d done something wrong, so I put her wedgie back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so fat the only thing stopping her from getting into Jenny Craig is the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby. One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth, and in the end, there were two little baby boys. The blond guy turned to his wife and angrily said, "All right, who''s the other father?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Joe Joe who? Jo mama', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would punch you but I couldn''t make you any uglier.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Whose there? Says Says who? Says me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An older couple is lying in bed one morning, having just awakened from a good night''s sleep. He takes her hand and she responds, "Don''t touch me!" "Why not?" he asks. She answers back, "Because I''m dead." The husband says, "What are you talking about? We''re both lying here in bed together and talking to one another." She says, "No, I''m definitely dead." He insists, "You''re not dead. What in the world makes you think you''re dead?" "Because nothing hurts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s invisible and smells like carrots? A: Bunny farts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two children were in a doctor''s waiting room. The little girl was softly sobbing. "Why are you crying?" asked the little boy. "I''m here for a blood test, and they''re going to cut my finger," said the girl. When he heard this, the little boy started to cry. "Why are you crying?" asked the girl. The boy looked at her worriedly and said, "I''m here for a urine test."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Beethoven doing today? -Decomposing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Ontario coupling were on vacation, driving around the province of Nova Scotia. At noon, they arrived at the town of Tatamagouche. The two began to bicker about the pronunication of the town''s name. The husband suggested that they stop for lunch and ask. At the restaurant, they placed their order. The wife asks, "Excuse me, but could you slowly pronounce the name of this place?" The employee looks surprised, but complies. "Bur ... ger ... King" (BTW the town''s name is pronounced Tat ah mah goosh)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning a little girl in her Sunday best was running so she wouldn''t be late for church. As she ran she kept praying, "Dear God, please don''t let me be late to church. Please don''t let me be late to church...." And, as she was running she tripped and fell. When she got back up she began praying again, Please, God don''t let me be late to church -- but don''t shove me either!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner market. The owner didn''t know what Johnny''s problem was, but the boys would constantly tease him. They would always comment that he was two bricks shy of a load, or two pickles short of a barrel. To prove it, sometimes they would offer Johnny his choice between a nickel (5 cents) and a dime (10 cents) and John would always take the nickel - they said, because it was bigger. One day after John grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside and said, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. They think you don''t know the dime is worth more than the nickel. Are you grabbing the nickel because it''s bigger, or what?" Slowly, Johnny turned toward the store owner and a big grin appeared on his face and Johnny said, "Well, if I took the dime, they''d stop doing it, and so far I have saved $20!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your baby''s first words were, "Attention, K-mart shoppers!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: Will you punish me for something I didn''t do? Teacher: Of course not! Boy: Good cause I didn''t do my homework!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An 83-year old woman decided that she''d seen and done everything, and the time had come to depart from this world. After considering various methods of doing away with herself, she came to the conclusion that the quickest and surest method would be to shoot herself through the heart. The trouble was, she wasn''t certain about exactly where her heart was, so she phoned her doctor and asked him. He told her that her heart was located two inches below her left nipple. So she shot herself in the left kneecap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five surgeons were taking a coffee break and discussing their work. "I think accountants are the easiest to operate on," said the first surgeon. "You open them up and everything inside is numbered." "I think librarians are the easiest to operate on," said the second. "You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order." "I like to operate on electricians," said the third. "You open them up and everything inside is color-coded." "I like to operate on lawyers," said the fourth. "They''re heartless, spineless, gutless, and their heads and their asses are interchangeable." "I like engineers," said the fifth. "They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beckham went into training one day and saw Owen with a thermo-flask. He asked him what it was for and Owen said "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold". The next day Beckham came into training with a thrmo-flask. So Owen asked him what he had in it. He said "well you said it kept hot things hot, and cold things cold so Posh told me to put in some coffee and enough choc-ices for the lads but when I looked into the thermo-flask, when I got here, the choc-ices had melted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor queries. "No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a pregnant women. On the way to the hospital, she got into a wreck. When she woke up her babies were already born. She asked the docter if she could see her babies. He said yes, and don''t worry your brother named them. The pregnant woman freaked out and said her brother was an idiot. The doctor said the girl''s name is Denice. The pregnant women said, "Maybe my brother is not such an idiot." Then the docter said that the boy''s name is "da nephew".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl and her best friend were at a cafe. The girl said her boyfriend finally told her about marriage. Her best friend asked her what he said. "He is married and has 3 kids," she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she has more chins than a chinese phone book!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If two''s a company and three''s a crowd... what''s four and five? NINE!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quickly read through the following text and count the number of F''s in it. FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS Managed it? Scroll down only after you have counted them! > >> >>> >>>> >>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>> >>>> >>> >> > OK? How many? Three? Wrong, there are six - no joke! Read again! FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS The reasoning is that the brain cannot process the word "OF". Incredible or what? Anyone who counts all six F''s on the first go is a genius. Three is normal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ghost Stories by I.C. Spooks Rocket to the sun by R.U.Nuts Your Book of Glamour by Q.T Pie The Camel Ride by Major Bum - issore How to Grow Shorter by Neil Down How to Grow Taller by Stan Dup', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Crime and Punishment by Laura Norda The Use of Natural Fertilizers; by G.G. Dunnit The Way to Quick Riches; by Robbin Banks Holidays in Britain; by A. Pauline Whetha Contagious Diseases; by Willie Catchit Driving Through Germany; by Otto Mobile Broken Window; by Eva Brick Monsters; by Frank N. Stein Cliff Tragedy; by Eileen Dover Even More to come, i promise!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Hole in the Bucket by Lee King Long Walk by Miss. D. Bus The Playground by C. Saw Fitting Carpets by Walter Wall Around the World by Sir Cumfrence Flexibility by Ben Dover Bladder Controld by Idon P. Freely', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it to the class the next day. When the time came to present what they''d found, the first little boy walked up to the front of the class made a small white dot on the blackboard and sat back down. Puzzled, the teacher asked him just what it was. "It''s a period,'''' said the little boy. "Well, I can see that,'''' she said, ''''but what is so exciting about a period?'''' " I don''t know,'''' said the little boy, ''''but this morning my sister was missing one, Daddy had a heart attack, Mommy fainted, and the man next door shot himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a dark and stormy night in the small Newfoundland village when Jarge''s wife suddenly went into labor. The doctor came to the house and realized there was no time to get to the hospital in the city, the baby was coming now! Just then the power went out. Jarge brought out the kerosene lantern and held it for the doctor. Within minutes, Jarge''s son was born. The elated parents were surprised when the doctor declared that another baby was coming. Soon, another baby had come into the world. And then a third. Jarge, somewhat in shock at the sudden prospect of supporting such a large family, started to back away. But wait, the doctor soon realized the end was not in sight. "Bring the light closer, Jarge, I think there''s another one!" "No way," cried Jarge, fleeing from the room. "It''s the light that''s attracting them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning, a priest wakes up and decides to go golfing. He calls his boss and says that he feels very sick, and won''t be able to go to work. Way up in heaven, Saint Peter sees all this and asks God, ''''Are you really going to let him get away with this?'''' ''''No, I guess not,'''' says God. The priest drives about five to six hours away, so he doesn''t bump into anyone he knows. The golf course is empty when he gets there. So he takes his first swing, drives the ball 495 yards away and gets a hole in one. Saint Peter watches in disbelief and asks, '''' Why did you let him do that?'''' To this God says, ''''Who''s he going to tell?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old, old man was lying in his death bed upstairs. His most favorite food in the world was chocolate chip cookies. As he lay there, gasping for each breath, he was sure he could smell freshly-baked chocolate chip cookies. He crawled out of bed and slowly limped down the stairs. Sure enough, across the kitchen, there was a huge platter of chocolate chip cookies on the table. He finally made it to the table and he reached a shaking hand towards the cookies. Suddenly, his wife slapped his hand sharply and yelled, "DON''T TOUCH THOSE-they''re for the funeral!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day an elderly couple was out for an afternoon drive and had to stop for gas. Attendant: " Would you like me to check the oil?" Wife: "What did he say?" Husband: "He wants to know if I want the oil checked." Attendant: "Would you like me to top up the washer fluid?" Wife: "What did he say?" Husband: "He wants to know if I want the fluids topped up." When the attendant heard them talking, he asked, "By the way, where are you from?" The husband replied, "We are from Nova Scotia." "Ah," said the attendant. "Years ago I was in Nova Scotia and had the worst love affair ever." The wife said, "What did he say?" Husband: "He thinks he knows you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day this woman got to thinking about how her and her husband''s sex life. She realized they basically didn''t have one, so she decided to go to the doctor and get him some pills. The next day she went and the doctor told her to put 1 pill in her husbands coffee every morning. So, the woman went home and the next morning she did exactly what the doctor perscribed. The woman thought that since the pills worked so well she would put more and more pills in his coffee. As the week passed the doctor decided to call. When the doctor called their daughter answered and when the doctor asked how things were going she replied,"Well, my mom''s dead, I''m pregnant, my brothers raw and dad is in the backyard saying,"here kitty kitty."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and brunette jump off a cliff at the same time. Why did the brunette hit the floor before the blonde? The blonde asked for directions!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wanted to determine if both his wife and mistress were faithful to him. So he decided to send them on the same cruise, then later question each one on the other''s behavior. When his wife returned, he asked her about the people on the trip in general, then casually asked her about the specific behavior of the passenger he knew to be his mistress. "She slept with nearly every man on the ship," his wife reported. The disheartened man then rendezvoused with his cheating mistress to ask her the same questions about his wife. "She was a real lady," his mistress said. "How so?" the encouraged man asked. "She came on board with her husband and never left his side."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An oil company was drilling test pits on the West coast of Newfoundland and never found anything so instead of filling the hole up they got a clever idea to cover the hole with an outhouse. So a week after, a Newfoundlander came across it in the woods and decided to use it. The next day another fella came and found him dead on the toilet. The police open an investigation to try and find out what happened to him. They asked his wife if there was anything wrong with him or if he was acting strange that day. His wife replied, " My husband was in perfect shape, the only thing strange about him is that he holds his breath until he hears a splash."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A company, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hires a new CEO. This new boss is determined to rid the company of all slackers. On a tour of the facilities, the CEO notices a guy leaning on a wall. The room is full of workers and he wants to let them know he means business! The CEO walks up to the guy and asks, "And how much money do you make a week?" Undaunted, the young fellow looks at him and replies, "I make $200.00 a week." The CEO hands the guy $200 in cash and screams, "Here''s a week''s pay,now GET OUT!" Feeling pretty good about his first firing, the CEO looks around the room and asks " Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-off did here?" With a sheepish grin, one of the other workers mutters, " Pizza delivery guy"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just found out that I was switched at birth. Legally, I shouldn''t come to work knowing my employee records may now contain false information. I can''t come in to work today because I''ll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. OK? When I got up this morning I took two Ex-Lax in addition to my Prozac. I am stuck in the blood pressure machine down at the pharmacy. I''ve used up all my sick days...so I''m calling in dead The voices told me to clean all the guns today. The dog ate my car keys, so now I have to hitchhike to the vet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are quotes made by real police officers: "If you run, you''ll only go to jail tired." "The handcuffs are tight because they''re new. They''ll stretch out after you wear them a while." "So, you don''t know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?" "No, sir, we don''t have quotas any more. We used to have quotas, but now we''re allowed to write as many tickets as we want." "Warning! You want a warning? Okay, I''m warning you not to do that again or I''ll give you another ticket." "Life''s tough; it''s tougher if you''re stupid." "In God we trust, all others are suspects."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At Heathrow Airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a compass, a protractor, and a graphical calculator. Authorities believe he is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He is being charged with carrying weapons of math instruction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 70-year-old man goes to the doctor''s for a physical. The doctor runs some tests and says to the man, ''''Well, everything seems to be in top condition physically, but what about mentally? How is your connection with God?'''' And the man says, ''''Oh me and God? We''re tight. We have a real bond, he''s good to me. Every night when I have to get up to go to the bathroom, he turns on the light for me, and then, when I leave, he turns it back off.'''' Well, upon hearing this the doctor was astonished. He called the man''s wife and said, ''''I''d like to speak to you about your husband''s connection with God. He claims that every night when he needs to use the restroom, God turns on the light for him and turns it off for him again when he leaves. Is this true?'''' And she says, ''''That idiot, he''s been peeing in the refrigerator!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him that because he was wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5,000 in a safety competition. "What are you going to do with the prize money?" the officer asked. The man responded, "I guess I''ll go to driving school and get my license." At that moment, his wife, who was seated next to him, chimed in, "Officer, don''t listen to him. He''s a smart aleck when he''s drunk." This woke up the guy in the back seat, who, when he saw the cop, blurted out, "I knew we wouldn''t get far in this stolen car." At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a voice asked, "Are we over the border yet?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She walked around to look at the artwork. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I''m drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like. Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing the girl replied, "They will in a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is walking down the docks when he sees a quadriplegic woman crying in a corner. Trying to be a nice guy he walks up and asks her what''s wrong. "I''ve never been hugged." replies the woman. The man figures it would be a nice thing to do, so he picks her up and hugs her. She smiles. Then her face drops and she starts crying again. "What''s the matter now?" asks the man. "I''ve never been kissed," says the woman. The man leans down and kisses the woman on the lips for a brief moment. The woman smiles for a bit, then starts sobbing again. The man, a bit annoyed, asks her again what''s wrong. The woman replies, "Because I don''t have arms and legs I''ve never been screwed." The man picks up the woman and carries her down the dock, then tosses her off the side of the dock into the water. The man yells at the woman, "NOW YOU''RE SCREWED!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SHAPING UP FOR A GOOD EXCUSE A police officer pulls over this guy who''s been weaving in and out of the lanes. He goes up to the guy''s window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyser tube." The man says, "Sorry, officer, I can''t do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that, I''ll have a really bad asthma attack." "Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample." "I can''t do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I''ll bleed to death." "Well, then, we need a urine sample." "I''m sorry, officer, I can''t do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that, I''ll get really low blood sugar." "All right, then I need you to come out here and walk this white line." "I can''t do that, officer." "Why not?" "Because I''m drunk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young brunette goes into the doctor''s office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me." She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so it goes on, everywhere she touches makes her scream. The doctor says, "You''re not really a brunette, are you?" She says, "No, I''m really a blonde." "I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a hospital in slight discomfort. "Can I have a hot towel to put on my nose, please?" The nurse was curious and asked, "Why would you like a hot towel to put on your nose?" The blonde replies, "Well, I wanted to sniff some coke to see what the big deal was, and I got an ice cube stuck up my nose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a casino and goes up to the craps table. She tells the dealers she wants to bet $10 000 on a single roll of the dice. The dealers figure that since shes a blonde, she must not know what shes doing, so they allow her to place the bet. Then the blonde starts to strip. The dealers ask her what shes doing and she replies, "I''m luckier when I''m naked. Hope ya don''t mind." So she rolls the dice and jumps up and down screaming, "I WON! I WON! YAY!" She hugs the dealers and picks up her chips and clothes and jumps excitedly away. While enjoying the view of the blonde jumping away, the second dealer leans over and whispers to the first dealer, "What''d she roll?" The first dealer says, "What? I wasn''t checking, I thought you were checking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband, so proud of the fact that his wife had given birth to 6 children, begins to call her "mother of six" rather than by her first name. The wife, amused at first, chuckles. A few years down the road, the wife has grown tired of her husband''s description. "Mother of six," he would say, "get me a beer!" "Hey mother of six, what''s for dinner tonight?" This situation persisted to boiling point. Finally, while attending a party with her husband, he jokingly yelled out, "Hey, mother of six, I think it''s time to go!" The wife seized the moment and shouted back, "I''ll be right with you - father of four!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother. The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight. The mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her. The wife cried, "What are we going to do?" "Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, a little boy and his family were having supper at his grandma''s house. Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When he received his plate, the little guy began eating right away. "Wait until we a say a prayer," his mother admonished. " I don''t have to," he replied. "Of course you do," his mother insisted. "We always say a prayer before eating at home." "That''s at home," he explained. "This is Grandma''s house and she knows how to cook!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The beautiful, vain blonde was visiting Las Vegas for the first time. She approached the roulette wheel, but it looked very confusing. "How should I bet?" she asked the man standing beside her. "Try betting your age," he suggested. So the blonde put $500 on the number 32. The ball landed on 36, and the blonde promptly fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an architect watched a mechanic remove engine parts from his car, a surgeon, waiting for his own car to be repaired, walked over. They introduced themselves, and began talking about their lines of work. "You know," said the architect, "I sometimes believe a mechanic''s work is as complicated as the work that we do." "Perhaps," the surgeon commented. "But let''s see him do it with the engine running."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a farmer who was very protective of his daughters. Before every date, he would meet the young man at the porch with his shotgun, and if he didn''t measure up, he''d make sure they left. One day all three of his daughters were going out on the same night. The first young man drove up and approached the porch. "Hi, my name is Joe, I''m here to get Flo, we''re going to the show, is she ready to go?" The farmer liked this guy, and let him leave with his daughter. Shortly, the next guy drove up and approached the porch. "Hi, my name is Freddy, I''m here to get Betty, we''re going for spaghetti, is she ready?" The farmer liked this guy too, and let him leave with his second daughter. Soon the third guy drove up and approached the porch. "Hi, my name is Chuck..." and the farmer shot him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting. "What''s up?" he asks. "I''m having a heart attack!" cries the woman. He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he is dialing, his 4-year old son comes up and says, "Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Ted''s hiding in your wardrobe and he''s got no clothes on!" The guy slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, past his screaming wife, and rips open the wardrobe door. Sure enough, there is his brother, totally naked, cowering on the wardrobe floor. ''''You bastard," says the husband. "My wife is having a heart attack and you''re running around with no clothes on scaring the kids!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man took a walk along a railroad track. Not paying attention, he got his foot stuck in a gap in the rails. Just then the whistle of the 10 a.m. train sounded in in the distance. He tried frantically to free himself, but to no avail. Looking up he prayed, "God, please get me free!" The Whistle sounded, again he pulled, no movement. "God! If you get my foot out I will stop smoking." The whistle sounded closer. Still pulling, he only seemed to get more stuck. "God! If you get my foot out I will stop smoking and drinking." Looking up he could now see the train engineer in the window of the engine. His foot still would not move. "God!!! If you get my foot out I will stop, smoking drinking and give my money to the poor!" At that moment his foot slipped from its grasp in the rail and he rolled clear of the train''s wheels............. "Never mind God I took care of it myself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a party, one man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. "What are you doing out here at 2 o''clock in the morning?" the officer asked. "I''m going to a lecture," the man said. "And who would be giving this lecture at this hour?" the cop asked. "My wife," the guy replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A groom and his bride are standing at the alter when the woman looks at her prospective husband and sees he has a set of golf clubs. "What on earth are you doing with those golf clubs in church?" she whispers. "Well," he replies, "this won''t take all afternoon, will it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old lady answered her door only to be confronted by a young vacuum cleaner salesman. "Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners." "Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven''t got any money," and she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door. "Don''t be too hasty," he said, "not until you''ve seen my demonstration." With that he emptied a bucket of dirt onto her hallway carpet. "If this vacuum cleaner doesn''t remove all traces of this dirt from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder." "Well," she said, "I hope you''re hungry, because the electricity was cut off this morning."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde have bruises around her bellybutton? A: Because her boyfriend was blond too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, Irishman, Scotsman and a fat man are all going skydiving. When they get to jump the Englishman shouts, "God save England!" The Scotsman shouts, "God save Scotland!" The Irishman shouts, "God save Ireland!" Then the fat man jumps and shouts, "God save whoever I land on!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A preacher dies, and when he gets to Heaven, he sees a New York cab driver who has more crowns. He says to an angel, "I don''t get it. I devoted my whole life to my congregation." The angel says, "We reward results. Did your congregation always pay attention when you gave a sermon?" The preacher says, "Once in a while someone fell asleep." The angel says, "Right. And when people rode in this guy''s taxi, they not only stayed awake, but they usually prayed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s another name for a push-up bra? False advertisement', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked women with only her privates covered with leaves. The wife doesn''t like it and moves on but the huband keeps looking. The wife asks, "What are you waiting for?" The husband replies, "Autumn."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher was having trouble teaching arithmetic to one little boy. So she said, "If you reached in your right pocket and found a nickel, and you reached in your left pocket and found another one, what would you have?" "Somebody else''s pants." the boy replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was watching her son pitch in a little league baseball. He wasn''t very good, walking all of the batters that came up to bat, but after every pitch, the mom was yelling wildy and cheering her wonderful son on. Because of all the batters he had walked, the score was 14-0 in the 1st inning. Finally, one little boy came up, hit a grounder, and made it safely to first. "Dang it," the mother muttered, "there goes his no-hitter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Chinese say: Baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men who walk in front of car get tired. Men who walk in back of car get exhausted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of soup do you order at a gay Chinese resturant? Cream of Yungi (Cream of Young Guy)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Saddam and an American were in the bathroom peeing in the urinals. When the American was done, he was going to leave without washing his hands. Saddam said, "You know, I learned to wash my hands." The American replied, "Well, I learned not to pee on my hands."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so dumb it took her an hour to make minute rice!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the phone rang, she excused herself from the sofa. A few seconds later she rejoined her male companion. "Who was it?" he asked. "My husband," she replied. "I better get going," he said. "Where was he?" "Relax. He''ll be late, he''s playing poker with you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two church members were going door to door, and knocked on the door of a woman who was not happy to see them. She told them in no uncertain terms that she did not want to hear their message and slammed the door in their faces. To her surprise, however, the door did not close and, in fact, bounced back open. She tried again, really put her back into it, and slammed the door again with the same result - the door bounced back open. Convinced these rude young people were sticking their foot in the door, she reared back to give it a slam that would teach them a lesson, when one of them said, "Ma''am, before you do that again, you need to move your cat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As soon as the newlyweds returned from their honeymoon, the young bride called her mother, who lived a couple of hours away. "How did everything go?" her mom asked. "Oh, mother," she began, "The honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic, we had a terrific time. But, mother, on our way back, Andy started using really horrible language. Stuff I''d never heard before. Really terrible four-letter words. You''ve got to come get me and take me home. Please, Mother!" the new bride sobbed over the telephone. "But, honey," the mother countered, "What four-letter words?" "I can''t tell you, mother, they''re too awful! Come get me, please!" "Darling, you must tell me what has gotten you so upset.... Tell mother what four-letter words he used." Still sobbing, the bride said, "Mother, words like dust, wash, iron, cook."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man died in a horrible fire. The mortician thought it was George, but the body was so badly burned that somebody would need to make a positive identification. That task fell to George''s two friends, Joe and Al. Joe: "He''s burnt pretty bad, all right. Roll him over." Joe looked at the dead man''s buttocks and said, "Nope, that ain''t George." Thinking the incident strange, the mortician straightened up the body and said nothing. He brought in Al. Al: "Wow, he''s burnt to a crisp. Roll him over." Again, "Nope, that ain''t George." Mortician: "How can you tell?" Al: "George had two assholes." Mortician: "What? How could he have two assholes?" Al: "Everybody knew George had two assholes. Whenever the three of us would go into town you''d hear people say, "Here comes George with those two assholes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus and Moses are playing golf. On the 5th hole, a shot over water to an island green, Moses hits his 6-iron and it lands perfectly on the green. Jesus takes out his 7-iron and begins tee-ing it up. Moses says: "The 7 isn''t enough club. It''ll go in the water" Jesus replies: "If Tiger Woods can do it, I can do it." He swings the 7-iron and sure enough, straight in the drink. He tees up a second ball and grabs his 7-iron again. Again Moses reminds him of his previous attempt and Jesus says, "If Tiger Woods can do it, I can do it." "PLOP" in the water, it goes again. He continues this until he has hit all his golf balls into the water. At this point, he begins walking out on the water looking down to locate his lost golf balls. The foursome behind them approaches the tee, spots Jesus out on the lake and says to Moses, "Hey, who does that guy think he is, Jesus Christ?" Moses replies, "No, Tiger Woods."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pope met with the Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Shimon Peres, leader of the Jewish nation. "Your holiness," said one of the Cardinals, "Mr. Peres wants to determine whether Jews or Catholics are superior by challenging you to a golf match." The Pope was greatly disturbed as he had never held a golf club in his life. "Not to worry," said the Cardinal, "We''ll call America and talk to Jack Nicklaus. We''ll make him a Cardinal, he can play Shimon Peres....we can''t lose!" Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made and, of course, Jack was honoured and agreed to play. The day after the match, Nicklaus reported to the Vatican to inform the Pope of his success in the match. "I came in second, your Holiness," said Nicklaus. "Second!?" exclaimed the surprised Pope. "You came in second to Shimon Peres!!??" "No," said Nicklaus, "second to Rabbi Palmer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man is playing golf with a priest. At a short hole the priest asks, "What are you going to use on this hole son?" The young man says, "An eight iron, father. How about you?" The priest says, "I''m going to hit a soft seven and pray." The young man hits his eight iron and puts the ball on the green. The priest tops his 7 iron and dribbles the ball out a few yards. The young man says, "I don''t know about you father, but in my church when we pray, we keep our head down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred had tried to be particularly careful about his language as he played golf with his priest. But on the twelfth hole, when he twice failed to hit out of a sand trap, he lost his resolve and let fly with a string of expletives. The preacher felt obliged to respond. "I have observed," said he in a calm voice, "that the best golfers do not use foul language." "I guess not, said Fred, "what the hell do they have to swear about?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A country club didn''t allow women on the golf course. Eventually, there was enough pressure that they decided to allow women on the course during the week. The ladies were satisfied with this arrangement, formed a women''s club, and became active. After about 6 months, the club board received a letter from the women''s club complaining about the men urinating on the golf course. Naturally, they just ignored the matter. After another 6 months, they received another letter reminding them of the previous letter and demanding action. After due deliberation they sent the women a letter advising them that they had been granted equal privileges!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The lady golfer was a determined, if not very proficient player. At each swipe she made at the ball, earth flew in all directions. "Gracious me," she exclaimed red-faced to her caddie, "the worms will think there''s an earthquake." "I don''t know," replied the caddie, "the worms round here are very clever. I''ll bet most of them are hiding underneath the ball for safety."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ll go and ask if we can go through, said Max to Jerry. The two golfers had been concerned for some time at the snail-like progress of two women, originally some holes ahead and now just in front of them on the ninth fairway. Max returned after only a few paces towards the ladies. "Jerry, this is very embarrassing, but would you mind going? That''s my wife up ahead and she''s playing with my mistress." Jerry returned having got no further forward than Max. "I say," he said, "what a coincidence..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He was a smooth operator, and at the club''s annual dance he attached himself to the prettiest lady golfer in the room and was boasting to her. "You know, they''re all afraid to play me. What do you think my handicap is?" "Well, where do you want me to start ?" came the quick response.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Ralph, both of equal ability, decide to have a round together and "play it as it lays" on all shots. Both hit their tee shots on the par-5 first hole down the middle and about 260 yards. They drive up for the second shot, and Bill hits his shot down the middle for an easy approach, but Ralph slices his over the trees and it ends up in the cart path of the adjoining hole. "Guess I get a free drop from the cart path," he says. "Oh no," says Bill, "We agreed. Play it as it lays." So Ralph drives Bill up to his ball in front of the green, drops him off and drives over to his ball on the cart path. Bill watches in amusement as sparks shower down from the practice swings of his opponent, then, in amazement as a perfectly struck shot lands on the green and rolls to within 3 ft. of the pin. Ralph drives back to the green. Bill says, "Great shot back there! What club did you use?" Ralph responds, "Your six iron."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick brings a friend to play golf with two of his buddies to complete a foursome. His buddies ask him if his friend can play golf. Dick says that he is very good. This guy hits the ball on the first hole in the bush, so his buddies look at him and say, "You said your friend was a good golfer." Dick says "Yes, he is watch him play." They see the ball come out of the bush on the green. This guy takes two putts to make par. Second hole is par 3. This guy hits the ball into the lake. The two buddies looks at Dick again and say "You said this guy was good" Dick replies that this guy was a great player. So the guy walks into the the lake. Three minutes later they can''t see the guy. All of a sudden they see a hand come out of the water. They tell Dick to dive in the lake to go get his friend, he''s drowning. Dick replies "No, that means he wants a 5 iron".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your late teeing off, Fred. "Yup, well being Sunday I had to toss a coin to see if I should go to church, or to play golf" "But why are you so late?" "I had to toss for it fifteen times!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Ralph meet on the golf course and decide to finish off the round together. Bill has a little dog with him and on the next green, when Bill holes out with a 20 foot putt, the little dog starts yipping and stands up on its hind legs. Ralph is quite amazed at this clever trick of the dog''s and says, "That dog is really talented! What does it do if you miss a putt?" Bill replies, "Somersaults." Ralph exclaims, "Somersaults! How many of them does it do?" Bill calmly replies, "Mmm, depends on how hard I kick it up the ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9. Well, how ''bout that?...I''m lost! Looks like we''ll have to stop and ask for directions. 8. You know, Pumpkin, now that you''re thirteen, you''ll be ready for unchaperoned car dates. Won''t that be fun? 7. Here''s a credit card and the keys to my new car - GO CRAZY. 6. What do you mean you wanna play football? Figure skating not good enough for you, son? 5. Your mother and I are going away for the weekend...you might want to consider throwing a party. 4. Well, I don''t know what''s wrong with your car. Probably one of those doo-hickey thingies - you know, that makes it run or something. Just have it towed to a mechanic and pay whatever he asks. 3. No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an earring, now quit your belly-aching, and let''s go to the mall. 2. Whaddya wanna go and get a job for? I make plenty of money for you to spend. 1. Father''s Day? Aaahh-don''t worry about that - it''s no big deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I''ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?" "Why?" "Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a guy''s printer type began to grow faint, he called a local repair shop where a friendly man informed him that the printer probably needed only to be cleaned. Because the store charged $50 for such cleanings, he told him he might be better off reading the printer''s manual and trying the job himself. Pleasantly surprised by his candor, he asked, "Does your boss know that you discourage business?" "Actually, it is my boss''s idea," the employee replied sheepishly. "We usually make more money on repairs if we let people try to fix things themselves first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you messed up your life, you could press "Ctrl, Alt, Delete" and start all over! To get your daily exercise, just click on "run"! If you needed a break from life, click on "suspend". Hit "any key" to continue life when ready. To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster. To "add/remove" someone in your life, click settings and control panel. To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings. If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers. When you lose your car keys, click on "find". "Help" with the chores is just a click away. You''d use your diskette to recover from a crash. We could click on "send" and the kids would go to bed immediately. To feel like a new person, click on "refresh". Click on "close" to shut up the kids and spouse. To undo a mistake, click on "back". Is your wardrobe getting old? Click "update". If you don''t like cleaning the litter box, click on "delete".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While my brother-in-law was tapping away on his home computer, his ten-year-old daughter sneaked up behind him. Then she turned and ran into the kitchen, squealing to the rest of the family, "I know Daddy''s password! I know Daddy''s password!" "What is it? her sisters asked eagerly. Proudly she replied, "Asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you''re out of the office?" "I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a murder trial, the defense attorney was cross-examining the coroner: Attorney: Before you signed the death certificate, had you taken the pulse? Coroner: No. Attorney: Did you listen to the heart? Coroner: No. Attorney: Did you check for breathing? Coroner: No. Attorney: So, when you signed the death certificate, you weren''t sure the man was dead, were you? Coroner: Well, let me put it this way. The man''s brain was sitting in a jar on my desk. But I guess it''s possible he could be out there practicing law somewhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were walking down the street. One noticed a compact on the sidewalk and leaned down to pick it up. She opened it, looked in the mirror and said, "Hmmm, this person looks familiar." The second blonde said, "Let me look!" The first blonde handed her the compact. The second blonde looked in the mirror and said, "You dummy, it''s me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was tired of being bossed around by his wife, so he went to see a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem and so gave him a book on assertiveness, which he read on the way home. He finished the book by the time he reached his house. The man stormed into the house and walked up to his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said, "From now on, I want you to know that - I - am the man of this house, and my word is law! "I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I''m finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward. "Then, after dinner, you''re going to draw me my bath so I can relax. And, when I''m finished with my bath, guess who''s going to dress me and comb my hair?" His wife replied, "The funeral director."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The fourth-grade teacher had to leave the room for a few minutes. When she returned, she found the children in perfect order. Everybody was sitting absolutely quiet. She was shocked and stunned and said, "I''ve never seen anything like this before. This is wonderful. But, please tell me, what came over all of you? Why are you so well behaved and quiet?" Finally, after much urging, little Sally spoke up and said, "Well, one time you said that if you ever came back and found us quiet, you would drop dead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man called the gorilla exterminator because a gorilla was in the tree in his front yand. When the exterminator came he had a gun, a stick, and a dog. He explained that he would climb the tree and poke the gorilla with the stick until it falls from the tree. "Then my dog will bite his testicles off." The guy suspiciously asked, "What is the gun for?" The exterminator replied, "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla, then you shoot the dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever wondered..... Why Most homes have lots of windows in the house, how ever, more than half of them are usually covered up with blinds so people can''t see you. If blind people can still see kindness in a person. Would they still have the same motto " No Shirt, No pants, No service" in a porn shop. Why on "children''s tylonnel" they put " Do not drive right after you have taken this". Why Many packaged peanut bags will say " May contain traces of peanuts" on them? Will you be smarter if you eat smarties( canadian candy) Will you be dumber if you lift dumb bells AND FINALLY..... Will you be able to figure out how long you slept if you bring a ruler to bed with you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re fat. can you still disapear into thin air? If you''re fat, can you still have slim chances of doing something?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe walks out of a bar, swaying back and forth with a key in his hand. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches. "Can I help you, fella?" asks the cop. "Yes! Somebody stole my car!" Joe replies. The cop asks, "Okay, where was your car the last time you saw it?" "It was at the end of this key!" Joe replies. At this point, the cop looks down and sees Joe''s penis hanging out of his trousers. So he asks Joe, "Hey buddy, are you aware that you''re exposing yourself?" Joe looks down sadly and moans, "Oh God.... they got my girlfriend too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between yo mamma and a water buffalo? About 20 pounds! How do you even out the difference? Either force feed the buffalo or shave your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if: 1) You drive your house and sleep in your car. 2) You think a loaded dishwasher means your wife is drunk. 3) You have more than 2 relatives named Buh Buh. 4) You let your 12 year old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of HER kids. 5) You''ve been to a wedding reception at the waffle house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done, and Everybody was asked to do it. Everybody was sure Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody''s job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn''t do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Know You''ve Turned Into a Mom When... You automatically double-knot everything you tie. You find yourself humming the Barney song as you do the dishes. You hear a baby cry in the grocery store, and you start to gently sway back and forth, back and forth. However, your children are at school! You actually start to like the smell of strained carrots mixed with applesauce. You weep through the scene in Dumbo when his mom is taken away, not to mention what Bambi does to you. You get soooo into crafts you contemplate writing a book called 101 Fun Crafts to do with Dryer Lint and Eggshells. You spend a half hour searching for your sunglasses only to have your teenager say, "Mom, why don''t you wear the ones you pushed up on your head?" You are out for a nice romantic meal with your husband, enjoying some real adult conversation, when suddenly you realize that you''ve reached over and started to cut up his steak!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Grandmother was surprised by her 7 year old grandson one morning when he had made her coffee. She drank what was the worst cup of coffee in her life. When she got to the bottom there were three of those little green army men in the cup. She said, "Honey, what are the army men doing in my coffee?" Her grandson said, "Grandma, it says on TV-''The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police Chief: As a recruit, you''ll be faced with some difficult issues. What would you do if you had to arrest your mother? New Recruit: Call for backup!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain." "Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I''m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back." "But, officer, I just wanted to say," "And I said to keep quiet! You''re going to jail!" A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief''s at his daughter''s wedding... He''ll be in a good mood when he gets back." "Don''t count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I''m the groom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ''There''s Jennifer; she''s a lawyer,'' or ''That''s Michael, he''s a doctor.''" A small voice from the back of the room rang out, "And there''s the teacher; she''s still old, nasty, and wrinkled"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One spring afternoon, I came home to find two little girls on the steps of my building. Both were crying hard, shedding big tears. Thinking they might be hurt, I dropped my briefcase and quickly went over to them. "Are you all right?" I asked. Still sobbing, one held up her doll. "My baby''s arm came off," she said. I took the doll and its disjointed arm. After a little effort and luck, the doll was again whole. "Thank you." came a whisper. Next, looking into the tearful eyes of her friend, I asked, "And what''s the matter with you, young lady?" She wiped her cheeks. "I was helping her cry," she said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock Knock. Who''s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock Knock. Who''s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock Knock. Who''s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock Knock. Who''s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn''t say banana!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 How do you fit an elephant into your fridge within 3 steps? 2 How do you fit a zebra in your fridge? 3 King of the jungle , the lion every animal in the jungle will come to his wedding but one animal won''t which one is it? 4 A man needs to get to the other side of a bridge desperately there are killer alligators that live in the river and there is no boat how do you get across?? 1. step 1- open the fridge. step 2- put elephant in the fridge. step 3- close the fridge. 2. step 1- open the fridge. step 2- take the elephant out. step 3- put the zebra in. step 4- close the fridge. 3. The zebra because it is in the fridge. 4. Swim because the alligators are at the wedding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so fat when she sat on a jelly bean it got lost between her butt and her backbone, and we have been looking for it still for 31 years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a girls track team and a tribe of pygmies? A: The pygmies are cunning little runts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call 4 blondes standing side-by-side? A: A wind tunnel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are 10 ways to tell if you have PMS, 1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem. 2. You''re adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet. 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans. 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say. 5. You''re using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says, "How''s my driving - call 1-800-***-****." 6. Everyone''s head looks like an invitation to batting practice. 7. You''re convinced there''s a God and he''s male. 8. You''re counting down the days until menopause. 9. You''re sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy. 10. The Motrin bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bear who''s into gardening? A Hairy Potter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you turn a blonde into a brunette? Make her do a cartwheel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So you want a day off. Let''s take a look at what you are asking for. There are 365 days per year available for work. There are 52 weeks per year in which you already have 2 days off per week, leaving 261 days available for work. Since you spend 16 hours each day away from work, you have used up 170 days, leaving only 91 days available. You spend 30 minutes each day on coffee breaks, which counts for 23 days each year, leaving only 68 days available. With a 1 hour lunch each day, you used up another 46 days, leaving only 22 days available for work. You normally spend 2 days per year on sick leave. This leaves you only 20 days per year available for work. We are off 5 holidays per year, so your available working time is down to 15 days. We generously give 14 days vacation per year which leaves only 1 day available for work and I''ll be damned if you are going to take that day off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abraham Lincoln, Bill Clinton, and George Washington were all on an airplane looking out the door. George Washington says, " I''m going to make somebody happy" then throws a $20 out of the plane. Bill Clinton says, "I''m going to make two people happy" then throws 2 $20''s out of the plane. Abraham Lincoln says "I''m going to make everybody happy" and throws Bill Clinton out of the plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Middle Age: when knees buckle and belts don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Navy dentist''s licence plate: TOP GUM', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Poise: the ability to continue speaking fluently while the other fellow is picking up the cheque.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man noted for his tact was awakened one morning at four o''clock by his ringing telephone. "Your dog''s barking, and it''s keeping me awake," said an irate voice. The man thanked his caller and politely asked his name before hanging up. The next morning at four o''clock, he called his neighbour back. "Sir," he said, "I don''t have a dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After giving a woman a full medical examination, the doctor explained his prescription as he wrote it out. "When you get up, take the green pill with a glass of water. Take the blue pill with a glass of water after lunch. Then just before going to bed, take the red pill with another glass of water." "Exactly what is my problem, Doctor?" the woman asked. "You''re not drinking enough water."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God: "Whew! I just created a 24-hour period of alternating light and darkness on Earth." Angel: "What are you going to do now?" God: "Call it a day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many managers does it take to change a light bulb? A: We''ve formed a task force to study the problem of why light bulbs burn out and to figure out what, exactly, we as supervisors can do to make the bulbs work smarter, not harder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many shipping department personnel does it take to change a light bulb? A: We can change the bulb in seven to ten working days, but if you call before 2 p.m. and pay an extra $15, we can get it changed overnight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many management information services guys does it take to change a light bulb? A: MIS has received your request concerning your hardware problem and has assigned you request number 39712. Please use this number for any future reference to the light bulb issue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A six-year-old comes crying to his mother because his little sister pulled his hair. "Don''t be angry at your sister," the mother says. "She doesn''t realize that pulling hair hurts." A short while later, there''s more crying, and the mother goes to investigate. This time the sister is bawling, and her brother says, "Now she knows."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee, and a l lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single." The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was equally intrigued by the derelict''s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said, "Well, you know what, you''re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?" The drunk replied, "Cause you''re ugly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfriends, and she will write a poem titled ''All Men Are Idiots.'' Then she will get on with her life. A male has a little more trouble letting go. Six months after the breakup, at 3 am on a Sunday morning, he will call and say, "I just wanted to let you know you ruined my life, and I''ll never forgive you, and hate you, and you''re a total floozy. But I want you to know that there''s always a chance for us." This is known as the ''I Hate You, I Love You'' drunken phone call and 99 percent of all men have made it at least once. There are community colleges that offer courses to help men get over this need', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men''s magazines often feature pictures of naked women. Women''s magazines also feature pictures of naked women. This is because the female body is a beautiful work of art, while the male body is lumpy and hairy and should not be seen by the light of day. Men are turned on at the sight of a naked woman''s body. Most naked men elicit laughter from women.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honey, said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn''t go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don''t feel like cooking a fancy meal!" "I know all that." "Then why did you invite a friend for supper?" "Because the poor fool''s thinking about getting married."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father and son went hunting together for the first time. The father said "Stay here and be VERY QUIET. I''ll be across the field." A few minutes later the father heard a blood curdling scream and ran back to his son asking "What''s wrong? I told you to be quiet." The son answered, "Look, I was quiet when the snake slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my neck. But when the two chipmunks crawled up my pant legs and said "Should we eat them here or take them with us?" I panicked...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Height of Patience: A naked woman lying down with her legs apart under a banana tree. Height of Frustration: A boxer trying to scratch his balls. Height of Innocence: A teenage girl applying Clearasil to her nipples. Height of Laziness: A guy lying on a girl and waiting for an earthquake to do the rest. Height of Competition: A guy peeing beside a waterfall. Height of Sophistication: Sucking nipples with a straw. Height of Disgust: While wiping after a good toilet dump, your finger pokes through the paper. Height of Technology: A condom with a zip. Height of Trouble: A one handed man hanging from a cliff and his arse is itching.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mummy, Mummy. I was at the playground and Daddy... Mummy tells him to slow down. She wants to hear the story, so Little Johnny tells her. "I was at the playground and I saw Daddy''s car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt, then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane laid down on the seat, then Daddy..." At this point Mummy cut him off and says, "Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the rest of it for suppertime. I want to see the look on Daddy''s face when you tell it tonight." At the dinner table, Mummy asks Little Johnny to tell his story. Johnny starts his story, describing the car going into the woods, the undressing, laying down on the seat and "... then Daddy and Aunt Jane did that same thing Mummy and Uncle Bill used to do when Daddy was in the Navy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The ten things a guy knows about a girl: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. They have boobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been known about the town, and on this very special occasion, a local newspaper reporter paid them a visit. He inquired as to the secret of their long and happy marriage. "Well"...explained the husband..."it all goes all the way back to our honeymoon, you see, we visited the Grand Canyon and we took a trip down to the bottom of the canyon by pack mule." He continues..."well now, we hadn''t gone too far when my wife''s mule stumbled, she quietly said...that''s once." "We proceeded a little further when the mule stumbled again and my wife quietly spoke...that''s twice." "You know, that mule hadn''t gone a half-mile when it stumbled a third time." My wife promptly removed a gun from her purse, hopped off the beast, and shot the mule dead." "I protested over her treatment of the mule, she slowly turned to me and quietly said...that''s once."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A six year old goes to the hospital with his grandma to visit his grandpa. When they get to the hospital, he runs ahead of his grandma and bursts into his grampa''s room. "Grampa, Grampa," he says excitedly, "as soon as grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a frog!" "What?" said his grandpa. "Make a noise like a frog because grandma said that as soon as you croaked, we''re going to Disneyland!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of kindergartners were trying to become accustomed to the first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on no baby talk. "You need to use ''big people'' words," she''d always remind them. She asked Chris what he had done over the weekend. "I went to visit my Nana." "No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use big people words!" She then asked Mitchell what he had done. "I took a ride on a choo-choo." She said, "No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. Use big people words." She then asked Bobby what he had done. "I read a book," he replied. "That''s WONDERFUL!" the teacher said. "What book did you read?" Bobby thought about it, then puffed out his little chest with great pride and said, "Winnie the Shit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Marla decided that the only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon quickie with their 10-year-old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony and order him to report on all the neighborhood activities. The boy began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation. "There''s a car being towed from the parking lot," he said. "An ambulance just drove by." A few moments passed. "Looks like the Anderson''s have company," he called out. "Matt`s riding a new bike and the Coopers are having sex." Mom and dad shot up in bed. "How do you know that?" the startled father asked. "Their kid is standing out on the balcony too," his son replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code" to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting their children in on it. They decided on the word Typewriter. One day the husband told his five year old daughter, "Go tell your mommy that daddy needs to type a letter". The child told her mother what her dad said, and her mom responded, "Tell your daddy that he can''t type a letter right now cause there is a red ribbon in the typewriter." The child went back to tell her father what mommy said. A few days later the mom told the daughter, "Tell daddy that he can type that letter now." The child told her father, returned to her mother and announced, "Daddy said never mind with the typewriter, he already wrote the letter by hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her class. She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to accumulate the building materials for his home. She read, "...And so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow full of straw and said, ''Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that straw to build my house?''" The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that man said?" One little boy raised his hand and said, "I know"..he said ''Holy Shit! A talking pig!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith, the Sunday School teacher, smiling sweetly said, "Bobby, when I was a child I was told if that I made ugly an face, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Bobby looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Smith, you can''t say you weren''t warned."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard over the hospital public address system: Due to a mix up in Urology, no apple juice will be served this morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When ice skating, never judge a brook by its cover.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children certainly brighten up a home. Who ever saw a child under 12 turn off an electric light?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American supply teacher came to a Canadian class one day. She told the students that she was an American and she asked if anyone else in the room was an American. Even though not many people in the room were, everyone put up their hand not to be left out, except one girl. The teacher stared at the girl and asked "If you''re not an American, then what are you?" The girl replied, "I''m a proud Canadian." The teacher asked "Why are you a Canadian?" The girl answered, "Because my parents are both Canadians." The teacher asked "What if both of your parents are stupid, then what will you be?" The girl answered, "Then I would be an American!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three kids named My, Butt, and Stupid. They were pretty dumb and didn''t know the word and. One day, they were playing ball on the sixth floor. Then, suddenly Stupid dropped the ball out the window. My jumped out the window to get the ball, while Butt tried to jump out the window to catch My. Stupid saw that the two of them fall out the window and ran down the stairs. When he got down, he saw a policeman looking at My and Butt. The policeman asked "Son, what is your name?" Stupid answered "I''m Stupid!" The policeman said "You''re not stupid, son, now do you know what happened here?" Stupid answered "My Butt fell out the window!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a grieving relative came to a grave yard to talk to the grave digger. The woman said to him "I am very poor, and I don''t know how I can pay for my husband to be buried!" The grave digger replied "No problem, I have ways for you to save money while having your husband buried." "How?" The woman asked. "It''s very simple," the grave digger replied. "To save money on the coffin, all you do is put your husband''s body in a large plastic bag, instead of a coffin. To save money on space of the burial, bury your husband standing up instead of laying down. To save money on the headstone, all you need to do to identify your husband is to bury only half of his body and leave his head and half of his body above groud. This also saves money and labour of me digging a whole grave!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you see peas spinning in circles? World Peace (whirled peas)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A genetic scientist managed to create dolphins that would live to 250 years of age - if they were fed seagulls. One day the scientist''s supply of gulls ran out, so he went out to trap some more. On the way back, he came upon two sleeping lions. Not wanting to wake the big cats, he gingerly stepped over them and was promptly arrested for... Transporting gulls across sedate lions for immortal porpoises!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a girl at a restaurant and ordered anything in a saucer. The waiter was walking to her table when the girl tripped him. The waiter said "Why did you trip me?" And the girl, without the least of the waiter''s worries simply said "I wanted to see a flying saucer!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot? Maybe someday we''ll find Bigfoot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat she''s got a real horse on her polo shirt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('R. B. Jones had just started a government job. Human Resources sent him a letter, instructing him that they needed his full name for their records, otherwise he could not be paid. They enclosed the proper form for him to fill out. R.B. wrote back to explain that he HAS no other names, only the initials R.B. So he filled in the form as follows: First name: R (only) Middle name: B (only) Last name: Jones Sure enough, come payday, R.B. received a pay cheque made out to Ronly Bonly Jones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a mom and a dad , they had a daughter called Angelica. So the dad was very thirsty because he had been driving a lot, so he asked his daughter "sweetheart can I have some of your juice?" She answers "daddy no drinking and driving, that''s what the law says!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Great Chicken Recipe: When I found this recipe I thought it was perfect for those who just are not sure how to tell when poultry is cooked thoroughly but not dried out. Give this a try. Baked Stuffed Chicken 2-3 kg chicken 1 cup melted butter 1 cup stuffing 1 cup uncooked popcorn salt & pepper to taste Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush chicken well with melted butter, salt and pepper. Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn. Place in baking pan in the oven. Listen for the popping sounds. When the chicken''s ass blows out of the oven door and flies across the room, the chicken is done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was on a plane when the stranger in the next seat said, "Let''s talk. Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passengers." Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to the stranger, "What would you like to discuss?" The stranger said, "How about nuclear power?" Johnny said, "That could be interesting. But first, I have a question. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same thing, grass. Yet a deer excretes pellets, while a cow excretes a flat patty, and a horse excretes clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?" The stranger said, "I have no idea." Johnny said, "Well, then, why do you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don''t know shit?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Visitor : "Knock knock?" Worker: "Who''s there?" Visitor : "Doughnut Man." Worker: "Doughnut Man who?" Visitor : "For the last time, do not (doughnut) bother me with your useless ''Knock-Knock'' jokes!" Worker: "But you started it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there Who Who who I don''t know what the heck your talking about but good owl impression.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blonde which is as sweet as a pickle and has dirty blonde hair? A sweet potatoe!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women met for the first time since graduating from high school. One asked the other, "You were always so organized in school. Did you manage to live a well planned life?" "Yes," said her friend. "My first marriage was to a millionaire; my second marriage was to an actor; my third marriage was to a preacher; and now I''m married to an undertaker." Her friend asked, "What do those marriages have to do with a well planned life?" "One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three ministers were talking about their common problem with bats in the belfry of the church. The first minister said, "I shot at them with a shotgun, but it only spoiled the woodwork." The second said, "I tried a more humane approach, netting them and releasing them 100 Km away. But they beat me back to the church!" The third (who was looking pretty smug) said, "I caught them, and baptized and confirmed each one. I haven''t seen them since."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are fingers on the statue of liberty 11 inches long? A: Because if they were 12 inches they would be feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock?? who''s there? Hatch Hatch-who? Bless you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s Bigger? Mr. Bigger or Mr. Bigger''s baby? His baby cause he is a little Bigger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Cinderella kicked off the basketball team? She kept running away from the ball!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock KnocK??? Who''s there? Ya Ya who? Where did that cowboy come from??', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a man becomes president, his wife is the first lady. If a woman became president, what would you call her husband? Whipped.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three blondes in the forest and they saw some tracks. The first blonde said, "Look, bear tracks." The second blonde said, "No, stupid, those are wolf tracks." The third blonde said, "You''re both wrong, those are rabbit tracks." Then the train came and ran them all over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother, "There were two boy kittens and two girl kittens." "How did you know?" his mother asked. Daddy picked them up and looked underneath, he replied, "I think it''s printed on the bottom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Duke is hunting in a forest with his men-at-arms and servants when he comes upon a tree. Archery targets are painted all over it, and smack in the middle of each is an arrow. "Who is this incredibly fine archer?" cries the Duke. "I must find him." After continuing through the forest for a few miles, he comes across a small boy carrying a bow and arrow. Eventually the boy admits that it was he who shot the arrows plumb in the center of all the targets. "You didn''t just walk up to the targets and hammer the arrows into the middle, did you?" asks the Duke worriedly. "No my lord. I shot them from 100 paces. I swear it by all that I hold holy." "That is truly astonishing," says the Duke. "I hereby admit you into my service, but I must ask one favor in return. You must tell me how you came to be such an outstanding shot." "Well," said the boy, "first I fire the arrow at the tree, and then I paint the target around it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Husband and Wife go to the hospital to deliver their child. The doctor meets them and tells them that he has a new system that will allow the father to take part or all of the mothers labor pains. They both agree and the delivery begins. The doctor turns the dial to 10%, so that the father will take 10% of the mothers pain. The husband says he feels fine, so the doctor puts it up a notch. The husband still feels fine, so the doctor puts it up to 30%. The husband still feels fine, so it goes up to 50%. The husband tells the doctor to go ahead and put it up to 100%. The husband still feels fine and the child is delivered and the wife felt virtually no pain at all. They both go back home with their child, where they find the mailman dead on their steps!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He who laughs last, thinks slowest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a boy and a teacher walking down the street one day. The teacher bought the boy some gum and after chewing it for a while it fell out of his mouth. He went to pick it up and the teacher said, "Never pick up things from the floor." Then, the teacher bought him an ice cream. It fell on the floor and he went to pick it up. Again, the teacher said to him, "Never pick up things from the floor." Next, the teacher bought the boy a lollypop. It fell to the floor and once again he went to pick it up. The teacher told him, "Never pick up things from the floor." After walking down the street some more there was a ditch ahead, but neither the boy nor the teacher noticed it. As they walked on the teacher fell in and started yelling at the boy, "Help me! Help me! The boy just looked down at her and said, "Never pick up things from the floor..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Emily was complaining to her mother that her stomach hurt. Her mother replied, "That''s because it''s empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it." The next day, the pastor was over at Emily''s family''s house for lunch. He mentioned having his head hurt, to which Emily immediately replied, "That''s because it''s empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?" HUSBAND: "Definitely not!" WIFE: "Why not - don''t you like being married?" HUSBAND: "Of course I do." WIFE: "Then why wouldn''t you remarry?" HUSBAND: "Okay, I''d get married again." WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)." HUSBAND: (makes audible groan). WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?" HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?" WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?" HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do." WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?" HUSBAND: "No, she''s left-handed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. She brought in a variety of lifesavers and said, "Children, I would like you to close your eyes and taste these." The kids easily identified the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher gave them honey-flavored lifesavers, all of the kids were stumped. "I''ll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It''s something your daddy and mommy probably call each other all of the time." Instantly, one of the kids coughed his onto the floor and shouted, "Spit ''em out, guys; they''re assholes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, "Get me a beer before it starts!" The wife sighs and gets him a beer. Ten minutes later, he says, "Get me another beer before it starts!" She looks cross, but fetches another beer and slams it down next to him. He finishes that beer and a few minutes later says, "Quick, get me another beer, it''s going to start any minute!" The wife is furious. She yells at him "Is that all you''re going to do tonight? Drink beer and sit in front of that TV? You''re nothing but a lazy, drunken, fat slob, and furthermore..." The man sighs and says, "It''s started..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Michael Jackson cover his body in cheese spread? Because kids will do anything for the taste of Dairylee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For all you Blonde ladies out there. Why are blonde jokes so short? So men can remember them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blond who can change a lightbulb? Talented', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a man who put the toilet seat down after use? Don''t know it''s never happened.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One I hope.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people grow old gracefully, while others fight and scratch the whole way. Andy''s wife, refusing to give in to the looks of growing old, goes out and buys a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she asks her husband - "Darling, honestly, if you didn''t know me, what age would you say I am?" Looking over her carefully, Andy replied,... "Judging from your skin, twenty; your hair, eighteen; and your figure, twenty five." "Oh, you flatterer!" she gushed. Just as she was about to tell Andy his reward, he stops her by saying... "WHOA, hold on there sweety!" Andy interrupted. "I haven''t added them up yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I went to lunch today, I noticed this lady about 75-80 years old sitting on a bench near the food court and she was sobbing her eyes out. I stopped and asked her what was wrong. She said: "I have a 22-year-old husband at home. He makes love to me every morning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, sausage, fresh fruit and freshly ground, brewed coffee." I said: "Well, then why are you crying?" She said: "He makes me homemade soup for lunch and my favorite brownies and then makes love to me half the afternoon." I said: "Well, so why are you crying?" She said: "For dinner he makes me a gourmet meal with wine and my favorite desert and then makes love to me until 2:00am." I said: "Well, why in the world would you be crying?" She said: "BECAUSE I CAN''T REMEMBER WHERE I LIVE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All the good knights were leaving for the Crusades. One knight told his best friend - "My bride is without doubt one of the most beautiful women in the world. It would be a terrible waste if no man could have her. Therefore, as my best and most trusted friend, I am leaving you the key to her chastity belt to use should I not return from the Crusade." The company of knights were only a mile or so out of town when they noticed a cloud of dust approaching. Thinking it might be an important message from the town the column halted. A horseman approached. It was the knight''s best friend. He yells - "Hey, you gave me the wrong key!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Ford and a golf ball? You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is an old lady driving on Interstate 22. A police car pulls her over and explains to the lady she is going 22 mph. She said, ''''I know, isn''t that the speed limit?" The officer said, ''''No, this is Interstate 22''''. The police officer looks in the back seat and there are three children looking quite ill. He asks her if they need help and she explains, ''''No, we just left Interstate 119."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Marine stationed in Afghanistan recently received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend back home. It read as follows: Dear Ricky, I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since you''ve been gone, and it''s not fair to either of us. I''m sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you. Love, Becky. The Marine, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow Marines for any snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex-girlfriends, aunts, cousins etc. In addition to the picture of Becky, Ricky included all the other pictures of the pretty gals he had collected from his buddies. There were 57 photos in that envelope....along with this note: Dear Becky, I''m so sorry, but I can''t quite remember who you are. Please take your picture from the pile, and send the rest back to me. Take care, Ricky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Susan went straight to her grandparent''s house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her. When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning." Horrified, Susan told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble. "Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding, and out on the Dong." She paused, wiped away a tear and then continued, "and if that damned ice cream truck hadn''t come along, he''d still be alive today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister was opening his mail one morning. Drawing a single sheet of paper from an envelope, he found written on it only one word: "FOOL." The next Sunday he announced, "I have known many people who have written letters and forgot to sign their names. But this week I received a letter from someone who signed his name and had forgotten to write a letter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The local high school has a policy that the parents must call the school if the student is to be absent for the day. Kelly, deciding to bunk and go to the mall with her friends waited till her parent''s had left for work and called the school herself. This is the actual conversation of the telephone call. Kelly: "Hi, I''m calling to report that Kelly so-and-so is unable to make it to school today because she is ill. Secretary at high school: "Oh, I''m sorry to hear that. I''ll note her absence. Who is this calling?" Kelly: "This is my mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you. - No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy. - Friendly fire ain''t. - The most dangerous thing in the combat zone is an officer with a map. - The problem with taking the easy way out is that t', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many FBI agents does it take to change a light bulb? A: I''m afraid that you are not able to receive this classified information.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Licensed Counselor was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children... "You all have obsessions," he observed. To the first mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You''ve even named your daughter Candy." He turned to the second Mom. "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child''s name, Penny." He turns to the third Mom. "Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child''s name, Brandy." At this point, the fourth mother gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers, "Come on, Dick, we''re leaving."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink. As the bartender set it down, he asked, "Going to a party?" ''Yeah,'' the man answered, ''I''m supposed to come dressed as my love life.'' ''But you look like Abe Lincoln.'' protested the barkeep. ''That''s right. My last four scores were seven years ago.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Nice Set of Floppies! - Hey, how ''bout I take off your cover and insert a bigger CPU. - I''d like to play on your laptop. - Need me to unzip your files? - If you were an ISP, I''d dial you all day long! - I''d like to boot up your PC! - I''ll bet my hard dr', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, this guy, Bill is sitting in a bar and pulls out this tiny little piano and a little guy about a foot tall. The little guy sits down and starts playing the piano quite beautifully. The fellow on the next bar stool, Joe, says ''That''s amazing. Where did you get him?'' Bill answers ''well, I got this magic lamp with a genie.'' So Joe asks ''that''s great, could I use it?'' Bill says ''sure '' and hands him the lamp. Joe rubs the lamp and out comes the genie. He continued, ''I want a million bucks''. Suddenly the room is entirely filled with quacking ducks! Joe exclaims ''Hey! I asked for 1 million BUCKS! Not DUCKS!'' Bill explained. ''Yes, the genie is a bit deaf. You don''t think I really asked for a twelve inch pianist do you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you''ll have lost at least 5 pounds." When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that''s amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?" The blonde nodded, "I''ll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that 3rd day." "From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor. "No, from all that skipping."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde jokes started when a brunette and a red head had to much time on their hands, because a blond was out with their boyfriends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish girl tells her Catholic college roommate that she''s going home for Roshashanna. "Oh," the Catholic girl says. "That''s the holiday when you light the eight candles, right?" "No," the Jewish girl replies. "That''s Hannukah." "Oh, right," the Catholic girl says. "Roshashanna is the holiday when you eat the unlevened bread?" "No," the Jewish girl replies. "That''s Passover. Roshashanna is the holiday when we blow the shofar." "See," the Catholic girl says. "That''s what I like about you Jews...you''re so good to the help."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A length of Rope went into a bar, sat on a stool, and ordered a beer. The Bartender said, "We don''t serve Ropes here." Dismayed and disappointed, the Rope went out and then got an idea. He stopped a man and asked, "Will you please tie a knot in me and separate my strands at both ends?". The man obliged, and with this done, the Rope went back into the bar and again ordered a beer. The Bartender looked him over and said, "Say, aren''t you the same rope who was in here before?!" "No," was the reply, "I''m a frayed knot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill walked into his favorite dive bar, took his regular stool, looked around, and asked Louie, the bartender, "Where''s Beverly, the waitress?" "She''s dead," replied the bartender. "Dead?" asked Bill. "She died from herpes," said the bartender. Bill replied, "You don''t die from herpes." "You do if you give it to Big Louie!" said the bartender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sat at a bar, drinking slowly. On his face was the saddest hangdog expression. The bartender asked, "What''s the matter? Are you having troubles with your wife?" The man said, "We had a fight, and she told me that she wasn''t going to speak to me for a month." The bartender said, "That should make you happy." The man sadly shook his head and said, "Not when the month is up today!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four business men are flying over the the UK having tea and taking in the sites The first man who is English looks out of the window and cries "Ah there is my beautiful England" A while later the second man who is Irish looks out and criess "There is my beautiful Ireland" A while after that the Third man looks out and criess "There is my beautiful Scotland" The fourth man who is Chinese feels very left out. He comes up with an idea. Picking up the tea set they have been using, he tosses it out of the window and cries "Ah my beautiful China"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: A mosquito will stop sucking when you smack it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bowling teams, one of all blondes and one of all brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City. The brunette team rides in the bottom of the bus; the blonde team rides on the top level.. The brunette team down below is whooping it up having a great time, when one of them realizes she doesn''t hear anything from the blondes upstairs. She decides to go up and investigate. When the brunette reaches the top, she finds all the blondes frozen in fear, staring straight ahead at the road, and clutching the seats in front of them with white knuckles.. She says, "What the heck''s goin'' on up here? We''re havin'' a grand time downstairs!" One of the blondes looks up and says, "Yeah, but you''ve got a driver!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the channels and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the woman ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps put her face in her hands and moaned, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in the 3rd grade. Who has the biggest tits? A: The blonde because she is 18.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you tell when a blonde has been driving your car? A: There is lipstick on the steering wheel from her blowing the horn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde''s house is on fire so she runs outside to use a payphone to call for help. She gets the 911 operator, and gets transferred to the firehouse. "Mr. Fireman, my house is on fire, you have to help me!" The Fireman replies, "Yes, yes, Miss, how do I get to your house?" The blonde pauses a moment, and replies, "Umm, it''s the house that''s on fire." Realizing he is now talking to a blonde, the fireman comes back with, "No, Miss, how would you like me to get to your house?" to which the blonde replies, "Duh, big red truck!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The executive was interviewing a young blonde for a position in his company. He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, "If you could have a conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?" The blonde quickly responded, "The living one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do blondes wear panties? A. To keep their ankles warm!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What are the worst six years in a blonde''s life? A: Fourth grade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. "Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked. "To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. "What''s the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving up?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between Snowmen and Snowwomen? A: Snowballs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineering student was walking across campus when another engineer rides up on a shiny new motorcycle. "Where did you get such a great bike?", asked the first. The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said ''Take what you want.''" The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn''t have fit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was out, driving happily along in his car late one Saturday night. Before too long, a cop pulled him over. The policeman walked up to the man and asked, "Have you been drinking, sir?" "Why? Was I weaving all over the road?" "No," replied the policeman, "you were driving splendidly. It was the really ugly girl in the passenger seat that gave you away."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Farmer John was taking his cow and it''s newborn calf to sell in the auction. On the way farmer John got robbed by thieves, who beat him up, stripped him of his clothes and tied him to a tree. Then taking the mother cow and John''s clothes, the thieves escaped. They, however, left the newborn calf behind. Poor farmer John suffered as for two days, he stood tied to a tree, stark naked and hungry. Fortunately, on the third day, some neighbors happened to pass by. They recognized John and untied him. When they did, farmer John picked up a long stick and started whipping the calf with it. ''Why are you thrashing the poor calf?'' his neighbors asked? To which farmer John replied, ''I had to tell this beast for the past two days repeatedly...I am NOT your mother! I am NOT your mother!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy dials his home phone from work. A strange woman answers. The guy says, "Who is this?" "This is the maid.", answered the woman. "We don''t have a maid!" "I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house." "Well, this is her husband. Is she there?" "Ummm .... she''s upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I just figured was her husband." The guy is fuming. He says to the maid, "Listen, would you like to make $50,000?" "What do I have to do?" "I want you to get my gun from my desk in the den and shoot that witch and the jerk she is with." The maid puts down the phone. The guy hears footsteps, followed by two gunshots. The maid comes back to the phone. "What should I do with the bodies?" "Throw them in the swimming pool!" "What?! There''s no pool here?" Long pause... "Uh .... is this 832-4821?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat you make sumos look anorexic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat Richard Simmons laughs at you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a little guy in a bar drinking his beer, when all of a sudden a big guy comes and knocks him off his stool and says "that was a karate chop from Japan" The little guy get''s back up on his stool again and start''s to drink his beer again, when all of a sudden the big guy knock''s him of his stool again, and says that was a karate kick from China, So the little guy get''s back up and leave''s for a moment then come''s back in and goes up to the big guy hits him and knock''s him off of his stool out cold.... he then, tell''s the bartender "when he gets up to ask me, that was a crowbar from Sears"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blonde and a brunette were talking on the phone. Then the brunette says, " I have to go get a new mouse for the computer. My mouse isn''t running good." Since the blonde hates mice. she goes over to her computer and opens it up, looking for a running mouse. She runs back to the phone and says, " But my computer works fine without a mouse"; but since she took so long looking for the mouse, her friend hung up and the phone battery was dying out so it sounded like a squeeky assuming and it was the mouse she searched her whole house finding not one mouse. Then she calls her brunette on the phone saying I can''t find one mouse in my house what does it look like? After she finished describing it the blonde finds it, then she squishes it saying, " There, it is dead! "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you think fast-food is hitting a dear at 65mph.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two crisps are walking down the road when a car pulls up alongside and the driver leans out and says "Do you fancy a lift?". The crisps reply, "No thanks we''re Walkers".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police officer: "Excuse me, but your dog has been chasing a man on his bicycle". Dog owner: "Are you crazy? My dog can''t even ride a bicycle".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attending the funeral of an actress who had been married ten times, a friend sobbed to the priest, "Well, at least they''re together at last." The clergyman looked around. "Which of her husbands is buried here?" "None," said the friend. "I meant, her legs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.What is the speed limit for sex? A. 68, at 69 you have to turn around!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After Great Britain''s Beer Festival, all the brewery presidents decided it would be fun to hit a pub in London and go out for a beer. The first sits down and says, "Hey, Senor, I would like the world''s best beer, a Corona." The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him. The second says, "I''d like the best beer in the world. Give me ''The King of Beers.'' One Budweiser please." The bartender gives him one. Another guy says, "I''d like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water; give me a Coors." The bartender gives him one. The guy from Guiness sits down as he orders a Coke. The bartender is a bit taken aback, but gives him what he ordered. The other presidents look over at him and ask, "Why aren''t you drinking a Guiness?" The Guiness president replies, "Well, if you guys aren''t drinking beer, neither will I."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You see a fabulous girl/guy at a party. You approach them and say, "I''m fantastic in bed." That''s Direct Marketing. You''re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a fabulous girl/guy. You have one of your friends approach them, point at you and say, "She''s/he''s fantastic in bed." That''s Advertising. You see a fabulous girl/guy at a party. You approach them to get their telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I''m fantastic in bed." That''s Telemarketing. You''re at a party and see a fabulous girl/guy. You get up, straighten your clothes, walk up and pour them a drink. You open the door, pick up their bag after it drops, offer them a ride, and then say, "By the way, I''m fantastic in bed." That''s Public Relations. You''re at a party and see a fabulous girl/guy. They walk up to you and say, "I hear you''re fantastic in bed." That''s Brand Recognition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive''s wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, "...and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two doctors opened an office in a small town. They put up a sign reading: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology." The town council was not too happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to: "Hysterias and Posteriors." This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to: "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids." No go! Next they tried "Catatonics and Colonics" Thumbs down again. Then came, "Manic-Depressives and Anal-Retentives." But is was still not good! So they tried: "Minds and Behinds" "Analysis and Anal Cysts" "Nuts and Butts" "Freaks and Cheeks" "Loons and Moons" "Lost Souls and Ass Holes" None worked. Almost at their wits'' end, the doctors finally came up with a title they thought might be accepted by the council: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, Odds and Ends." APPROVED!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home with his little daughter, whom he has just taken to work. The little girl asks, "I saw you in your office with your secretary. Why do you call her a doll?" Feeling his wife''s gaze upon him, the man explains, "Well, honey, my secretary is a very hard-working girl. She types like you wouldn''t believe, she knows the computer system and is very efficient." "Oh," says the little girl, "I thought it was because she closed her eyes when you lay her down on the couch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a boss who was told by his boss that he had to get rid of at least one employee. So he narrowed the decision to one of two new employees, Jack or Mary. He then decided to speak to each one privately, and let their reactions help guide his decision. So he called in Jack, explained the situation and, of course, Jack said he didn''t want to lose his job, but he understood the boss''s situation. Then he called in Mary, and said, ''Mary, I''ve got a problem; By the end of the day, I''ve got to lay you or Jack off...'' And Mary says, ''Then you''re gonna have to jack off, buster, I''ve got a headache!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, "Something has just come up. I have the chance to go fishing for a week. It''s the opportunity of a lifetime. We leave right away, so can you pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and especially my blue silk pajamas? I''ll be home in an hour to pick them up." He hurries home, grabs everything and rushes off. A week later he returns. His wife asks, "Did you have a good trip?" "Oh yes, great! But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas." "Oh no I didn''t. I put them in your tackle box."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three little boys were looking for a summer job. Their preacher needed some people to go around and sell bibles. So the preacher hired two boys without even thinking twice. But he was hesitant about hiring the third boy because he suffered from a speech impediment. So after the first days of work they all met back at the church. The preacher looked at the first boy and asked him, "How many bibles did you sell?" The boy stood up and said, "35." "Is that all you sold?" the preacher asked. "He looked at the second boy and asked him the same thing. The boy said, "75." "That is good," the preacher replied. He didn''t want to ask the third boy but did. The boy with the speech impediment said ''''I-I-I s-s-sold 175.'''' The preacher was amazed and asked the boy how did he sell all of the bibles. He said ''''I-I-I t-t-told them to b-b-buy t-t-them or I will r-r-read it to t-t-them''''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boss (to the new employee): We are very keen on cleanliness. Did you wipe your feet on the mat as you came in? New employee: Yes, sir. Boss: We are also keen on truthfulness. There is no mat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man came back from a long business trip to find that his son had a new $300 mountain bike. "How''d you get that, son?" "By hiking." "Hiking?" "Yeah, every night, Mom''s boss came over and gave me $20 to take a hike."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A baby polar bear goes up to his dad and asks, "Dad, am I pure polar bear?" The dad replies, "Sure you are son. I''m all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear, your mom is all polar bear, and her parents are all polar bear." Still unsure the baby polar bear goes to his mom and asks, "Mom, am I pure polar bear?" She answers, "Of course you are honey. I''m all polar bear, your father is all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear, and his parents are all polar bear." Still not convinced the baby polar bear goes to his grandparents and asks, "Grandmom...Grandpop...am I all polar bear?" His grandmother answers, "Of course you are sweetie. We''re all polar bear, your mother is all polar bear, your father is all polar bear, and his parents are all polar bear. Why do you ask sweetie?" The baby polar bears replies, "Because I''m f-ing freezing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse and a rabbit are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the rabbit to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The rabbit runs to the farm but the farmer can''t be found. So he drives the farmer''s Mercedes back to the mud hole and ties some rope around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend, the horse, and drives the car forward saving him from sinking! A few days later, the rabbit and horse were playing in the meadow again and the rabbit fell into the mud hole. The rabbit yelled to the horse to go and get some help from the farmer. The horse said, "I think I can stand over the hole!" So he stretched over the width of the hole and said, "Grab for my dick and pull yourself up." The rabbit did and pulled himself to safety. The moral of the story: If you are hung like a horse, you don''t need a Mercedes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl is in line to see Santa. When it''s her turn, she climbs up on Santa''s lap. Santa asks, "What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?" The little girl replies, "I want a Barbie and G.I. Joe." Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says, "I thought Barbie comes with Ken." "No," said the little girl. "She comes with G.I. Joe, she fakes it with Ken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat that she is on both sides of the family!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde, brunette, and a redhead were hiking when they came across a cliff. There was no bridge and they couldn''t think of anyother way to get across so they decided to turn around and go back. Just then a magical fairy appeared and said that they could turn into anything they wanted to help them get across the cliff, all they had to do was run, jump, and say the name of it. The brunette ran and jumped and yelled out, "Eagle," and she soared across the cliff. The redhead ran and jumped then yelled, "Hawk," and flew across to the other side. Then it was the blonde''s turn she ran and jumped. When she was in mid air, she forgot what she was going to say and yelled "O crap!"....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This lonely little boy was sitting at home, and he recently discovered the noises and smells that can emit from his body in the form of a fart. So the bored little boy decided to travel the world looking for the best fart, He went to Canada and realized that the cold temperature caused the farts to be really short. He went to Mexico and realized all the spicy foods caused really uncomfortable farts. All other parts of the world had interesting farts but not what the boy was looking for. Feeling that he failed, the boy went back home after his yearly trips around the world, only to walk in on his mom bending over into an oven attempting to pull a cake out. In the middle of her attempt she ripped the biggest fart in the world, The boy was immediately excited he found the best fart, Which proves the moral of the story HOME IS WHERE THE FART IS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary. The husband yells, "When you die, I''m getting you a headstone that reads, ''Here Lies My Wife -Cold As Ever.''" "Yeah?!" she replies. "When you die, I''m getting you a headstone that reads, ''Here Lies My Husband -Stiff At Last.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 75-year-old woman went to the doctor for a check up. The doctor told her she needed more cardiovascular activity, and recommended that she engage in sexual activity three times a week. A bit embarrassed, she said to the doctor, "Please tell my husband." The doctor went out into the waiting room and told the husband that his wife needed sex three times a week. The 80-year-old husband replied, "Which days?" The doctor answered, "Monday, Wednesday, and Friday would be ideal. The husband said, "I can bring her on Monday and Wednesday, but on Fridays, she''ll have to take the bus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All the little rascals sat down for class, and the teacher decided to start off the day with a spelling quiz. The teacher first asked Darla, "Darla, can you spell dumb?" "D-u-m-b," said Darla The teacher then said, "Can you use it in a sentence?" "Buckwheat is dumb." "Okay, can you spell stupid?" said the teacher. "S-t-u-p-i-d." "Can you use it in a sentence?" "Buckwheat is stupid." "Buckwheat, can you spell dictate?" "D-i-c-t-a-t-e." "Can you use it in a sentence?" "I may be dumb, and I may be stupid, but Darla says my dictate good."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the cafeteria of a Catholic school, the children were lined up for lunch. At the head of the line was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note and she had placed it in front of the apples. The note read: "Take only one, God is watching." Further down the cafeteria line was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies... One of the boys had written a note of his own. The note he placed in front of the cookies read: "Take all you want, God is watching the apples."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pharmacy and asks for a pack of condoms. As soon as he has paid for them, he starts laughing and walks out. The next day, the same performance, with the man walking out laughing, fit to bust. The pharmacist thinks this odd and asks his assistant, if the man returns, to follow him. Sure enough, he comes into the store the next day, repeating his actions once more. The assistant duly follows. Half an hour later, he returns. "So did you follow him?" "Yes, I did." "And...where did he go?" "Over to your house..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I woke up one morning knowing I was going to have a bad day. I went to put on my shirt, but when i picked it up, one of the buttons fell off. When i went to put on my pants the button fell off of them too. I went downstairs to eat my breakfast, my toast fell off the plate. By then i was getting very frustrated. I picked up my brief case, and as you have guessed by now, something fell off. I decided to walk to work. When I got in I told my boss, "I''ve really got to use the bathroom." He said, "Why didn''t you use it at home?" I replied, "Because everything I touched, something fell off so I''m afraid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in a red ferari speeding down a country road being chased by a squad car. They try to lose him by darting into a forest behind a farm. The trio ditch the car and decide to each hide in three burlap sacs on the ground. The cop who was really close on their tail went up to each sac. The cop kicked the first sac and the brunette inside said; "Woof woof" "Oh it''s just a dog." Then he kicked the second sac, Inside that sack the redhead said; "Meow Meow" "Oh, it''s just a kitten. Then the cop went up to the third sac with the blonde inside and kicked it The blonde said "Potato potato"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''The Romance of Leprosy'', E Mackerchar 1949 ''Why bring that up? a guide to seasickness'', J F Montague 1936 ''Penetrating Wagner''s Ring'', John L Di Gaetanao 1978 ''Constipation & our Civilization'', J C Thomson 1943 ''A pictorial book of tongue coating'', Anon 1981 ''A Government committee of Enquiry on the Light metal artificial Leg'', Captain Henery Hulme & Chisholm Baird 1923 ''Daddy was an undertaker'', McDill, McGown & Gassman 1952 ''Amputation Stumps: Their care & after-treatment'', Sir Godfrey Martin Huggins 1918 ''A Study of Masturbation & its reputed Sequelae'', J F W Meagher 1924 ''Sex after Death'', B J Ferrell & D E Frey 1983', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He who laughs last, doesn''t get the joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count, and those who can not!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vacation begins when dad says. "I know a shortcut"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Energizer Bunny arrested... charged with battery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lottery, a tax on people who can''t do math', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('all generalizations are false', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, and you so poor, she stepped in your house and the tires popped.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eat right, stay fit, die anyway!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('IRS... we''ve got what it takes, to take what you''ve got', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Laugh alone and the world thinks you''re an idiot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DNA, national dyslexic association', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be nice to your kids, they''ll choose your nursing home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No one is listening to you until you make a mistake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dyslexics of the world, untie!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DARE, to keep cops off donuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the other hand, you have different fingers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Save a tree, eat a beaver!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nothing is fool proof to a sufficiently talented fool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I wake up grumpy, other times I let her sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always remember that you are unique, just like everybody else!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always go to other peoples funerals, or they wont come to yours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nobody''s perfect-I''m a nobody.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ask me about my vow of silence..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Courdory pillows--they''re making headlines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is another word for Thesaurus?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The hardness of butter is directly proportional to the softness of bread.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many gay people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 8, one to screw it in, and seven to stand back and say "Fabulous!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man who entered a local paper''s pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Conversations often begin with "Put the gun down, and then we can talk." 9. The school principal has your number on speed-dial. 8. The cat is on Valium. 7. People have trouble understanding your kids, because they learned to speak through clenched teeth. 6. You are trying to get your four-year-old to switch to decaffeinated. 5. The number of jobs held down by family members exceeds the number of people in the family. 4. No one has time to wait for microwave TV dinners. 3. "Family meetings" are often mediated by law enforcement officials. 2. You have to check your kid''s day-timer to see if he can take out the trash. 1. Maxwell House gives you industrial rates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Your boss is always yelling, "I wanna see your ass in here by 8:00!" 2. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan. 3. "I''d love to chip in, but I left my wallet in my pants." 4. To stop those creepy guys in Marketing from looking down your blouse. 5. You want to see if it''s like the dream. 6. So that with a little help from Muzak you can add "Exotic Dancer" to your exaggerated resume. 7. People stop stealing your pens after they''ve seen where you keep them. 8. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk. 9. Gives "bad hair day" a whole new meaning. 10. No one steals your chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Flebs, a teacher, was standing in front of her class. It was the beginning of the new school year. Mrs. Flebs said, "Okay class, we''re going to go around the room and have everybody say a sentence. We''ll start with Sarah." Sarah said, "Cows have spots." Terrence said, ''''Baseball is a sport." Carla said, "Computers are electronic." Bobby said, "Urinate." Mrs. Flebs said, "Bobby, urinate is a word, not a sentence." Bobby said, "Not urinate, it''s you''re an eight. And if you had bigger tits you''d be a ten."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this guy and he had a girlfriend called Lorraine who was very pretty and he liked her a lot. One day he went to work to find that a new girl had started. Her name was Clearly and she was absolutely gorgeous. He became quite besotted with her and after a while it became obvious that she was interested in him too. But this guy was a loyal man and he wouldn''t get involved with Clearly while he was still going out with Lorraine. He decided that there was nothing for it but to break up with her and get it on with the new girl. He planned several times to tell Lorraine but he couldn''t bring himself to do it. One day they went for a walk along the river bank when Lorraine slipped and fell in to the river. The current carried her off and she drowned. The guy stopped for a moment by the river and then ran off singing - "I can see Clearly now Lorraine has gone"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the definition of a sick bird? A: Illegal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Veronica: Nurse, I am losing my hair! Nurse: Okay, what size paper bag do you need?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother: "Why is the bride dressed in white?" "Because white is the color of happiness and today is the happiest day of her life," her mother tried to explain, keeping it simple. The child thought about this for a moment, then said: "So then why is the groom wearing black?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lil boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, "Where`s Mom and Dad? " and she replied, "They`re up in bed," so the lil boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he came back in for lunch and asked his grandma "Where`s Mom and Dad?" and she replied, "They`re still up in bed," and the lil boy started to giggle and he ate his lunch and went out to play. Then the lil boy came in for dinner and once again he asked his grandma, "Where`s Mom and Dad?" and his grandmother replied "They`re still up in bed" and the little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, "What give''s? Every time I tell you they`re still up in bed you start to laugh! What is going on here?" The little boy replied, "Well last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue instead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Her name was Virginia. They called her Virgin for short, but not for long!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And out of the night came the terrible scream, "Who put the sand in the Vaseline!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If my dog was as ugly as your mom, I''d shave its butt and teach it to walk backwards!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde missed a 44 bus so she took the 22 bus twice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A panda walks into a bar and eats lunch. When he is finished he shoots the waiter and leaves. The owner ran after the panda and asked him why he did such and thing. The panda replied, "Look up the word ''panda'' in the dictionary." The owner did so and it read, "Panadas are black and white animals. They eat shoots and leaves."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross a snake and a kangaroo? A: A jump rope', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross a kangaroo and a sheep? A: A sweater with pockets', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All the boys and girls in Mrs. Dovers class are drawing. Mrs. Dover came over to Tommy and said, "What picture are you drawing?" Tommy said, "A cow eating grass." "Ok, where''s the grass?" "The cow ate it all." "Ok, where''s the cow?" "He went to go look for more grass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between two yards? A. Usually a fence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock? Who''s there? Megan Megan who? Makin a list chekin it twice gonna find out who''s naughty or nice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When physics meets Star Wars: May the net force be with you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Q: What would you do if a cheetah charged you? A: Pay him cash. (But don''t worry. He accepts credit cards too.) 2. Q: Who went into the tiger''s lair and came out alive? A: The tiger. 3. Q: If there were ten cats in a boat and one jumped off, how many are still on the boat? A: None- they were all copy cats. 4: Q: What has four legs and two eyes but sees just as well from both ends? A: A tiger with its eyes closed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did piglet look in the toilet? A: He was looking for Pooh (poo)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were 3 tomatoes. A momma tomato, a papa tomato, and a baby tomato. The baby tomato started to fall behind and the papa tomato called over to him and said, "Ketchup!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All lazy peoples'' slogan must be "The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese." But fear not for all of you who wake up early just keep this in mind: The first cat gets the mouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains. She tells the salesman: "I would like to buy a pink curtain that''s the size of my computer screen". The surprised salesman replies: "But, madam, computers do not need curtains...." And the blonde said: "Helloooo.... I''ve got Windows!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Yo da lay he. Yo da lay he who? I didn''t know you could yodel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever. At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said, "I''m sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral ...I''m a gynecologist." At that point, the proctologist fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft''s all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can''t get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I''ve got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, ''''If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow I''d be a little bull.'''' The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid, who continues with, ''''If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant.'''' The kid goes on with several animals until the bus driver gets angry and yells at the kid, ''''What if your dad was a drunk and your mom was a prostitute?!'''' The kid smiles and says, ''''I would be a bus driver!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t a blonde talk during sex? Because her mother told her never to talk to strangers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s black, blue, brown and laying in a ditch? A: A brunette who''s told too many blonde jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A four year old was at the pediatrician for a check up. As the doctor looked in her ears with an otoscope, he asked, "Do you think I''ll find Big Bird in here?" The little girl stayed silent. Next, the doctor took a tongue depressor and looked down her throat. He asked, "Do you think I''ll find the Cookie Monster down there?" Again, the little girl was silent. Then the doctor put a stethoscope to her chest. As he listened to her heart beat, he asked, "Do you think I''ll hear Barney in there?" "Oh, no!" the little girl replied. "Jesus is in my heart. Barney''s on my underpants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was reading the paper when an ad caught his eye. It loudly announced, "$500 Porsche! New!" The man thought that it was very unusual to sell a Porsche for $500, and he thought it might be a joke, but he said to himself, ''it''s worth a shot.'' So he went to the lady''s house who was selling the Porsche and she led him into the garage. Sure enough, there was an almost brand new Porsche. "Wow!" the man said, "Can I take it for a test drive?" "Sure," answered the lady. Unlike what he expected, the man found that the car ran perfectly. When he got back to the lady''s house, he asked her, "Why are you selling me this great Porsche for only $500?" Then the lady replied with a laugh, "My husband just ran off with his secretary, and he told me, ''You can have the house and the furniture, just sell my Porsche and send me the money.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man left for work one Friday afternoon, but since it was payday, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire paycheck instead of just going straight home. When he finally appeared at home on Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and a two-hour tirade befitting his actions. Finally his wife stopped the nagging and simply asked, "How would you like it if you didn''t see me for two or three days?" The man replied, "That would be fine with me." Monday went by and he didn''t see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. Come Thursday, the swelling went down just enough that he could see her a little bit out of the corner of his left eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s There? Rita Rita who? Rita book, you might learn something!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call a guy that sits on your doorstep? A. A Matt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a guy with a Spade in his head? A: Doug. Q: What do you call a guy without a spade in his head? A: Douglas', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: Who am I if I have 73 eyes, 4 noses, 8 heads, 139 arms, 78 legs and 100, 000, 000 lips? Answer: A liar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following: ''''Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, they come together. I come again. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once-a-more.'''' ''''You foul-mouthed swine,'''' retorted the lady indignantly. ''''In this country we don''t talk about our sex lives in public.'''' ''''Hey, coola down lady,'''' said the man. ''''Imma just tella my friend howa to spella Mississippi.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman went to her doctor''s office. She was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out screaming and ran down the hall. An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she explained. He had her sit down and relax in another room. The older doctor marched back to the first and demanded, "What''s the matter with you? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old, she has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?" The new doctor smiled smugly as he continued to write on his clipboard. "Cured her hiccups though, didn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to his wife, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?" "It depends," she replied. "What does it say on your shirt?" He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo daddy so bald he has to have holes in his pocket to finger through his hair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) If you and I were squirrels, I could bust a nut in your hole. 2) How do you like your eggs: fried, scrambled or fertilized? 3) My love for you is like diarrhea; I just can''t hold it in. 4) If your right leg was Thanksgiving, and your left leg was Christmas, then could I meet you between the holidays? 5) How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I''ll give you the meat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally, he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him. "Pardon me," she said, "I''m sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It''s just that you look just like my son who just died recently." "I''m very sorry," replied the young man, "Is there anything I can do for you?" "Yes," she said. "As I''m leaving, can you say ''Goodbye mother''? It would make me feel much better." "Sure," answered the young man. As the old woman was leaving, he called out, "Goodbye mother!" As he stepped up to the checkout counter, he saw that his total was $127.50. "How can that be?" he asked, "I only purchased a few things!" "Your mother said that you would pay for her," said the clerk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the letter E like London? Because it is the Capital of England', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What disasters would happen if a waiter dropped a plate of turkey? The downfall of Greece, the overthrow of Turkey and the break up of China', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the blonde''s first words after 4 years of college? "Would you like fries with that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock? Who''s there? Alison. Alison who? Alison (I listen) to the radio sometimes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is walking down the street. Further down the street he notices Little Johnny. Little Johnny is sitting in a red wagon, wearing a fireman''s hat. The wagon is tied to a dog, by its balls. The man says to LittleJohnny "Little Johnny you could go alot further, if you tied the rope around the dogs neck." Little Johnny replies "If I did that, I wouldn''t have a siren"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A market researcher called at a house and his knock was answered by a young woman with three small children running around her. He asked her if she minded replying to his questions and she agreed. He asked her if she knew his company, Cheeseborough Ponds. When she said no, he mentioned that among their many products was Vaseline and she certainly knew of that product. When asked if she used it, the answer was "Yes." Asked how she used it, she said, "To assist sexual intercourse." The interviewer was amazed. He said, "I always ask that question because everyone uses our product and they always say they use it for the child''s bicycle chain, or the gate hinge; but I know that most use it for sexual intercourse. Since you''ve been so frank, could you tell me exactly how you use it?" "Yes, we put it on the doorknob to keep the kids out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a girl who wanted larger breasts, so one day she went to see her doctor, Dr. Smith. Dr. Smith told her to rub her breasts and repeat the following: "SCOOBIE,DOOBIE,LOOBIE, I WANT BIGGER BOOBIES". One day she was running late, and decided to do her exercises on the bus when a guy came up to her and asked if she was a patient of Dr. Smith''s, to which she replied: "Yes, how did you know?". He replied "HICKORY DICKORY DOC!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A son walks into the living room and asks his dad to borrow the car because he has a hot date. The dad says, ''''Sure, as soon as you cut your long hair.'''' The boy smiles and thinking he has outsmarted his dad replies, ''''Dad, Jesus had long hair...'''' And the dad replied, ''''Yeah, and Jesus walked everywhere he went too, didn''''t he?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor''s office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don''t do the following, your husband will surely die." "Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him. Don''t burden him with chores. Don''t discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse. No nagging. And most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week. If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely." On the way home, the husband asked his wife. "What did the doctor say?" "He said you''re going to die," she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo'' mama so poor, all she got you for Christmas was a video of other kids playin'' with their toys!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does it mean when a blonde is saying, "yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no?" She''s testing if her brunette friend''s turn signal is working!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks in to an auto store and asks the blonde cashier where the turtle wax is. The blonde says,"I''m sorry sir, but we don''t sell pet supplies."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a jailer and a jeweler? One sells watches, one watches cells!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so stupid she threw a clock out the window to see time fly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde keep a picture of herself in her room? So she could use it as a mirror!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was recess and the pre-schoolers came in. The teacher asked Susie what she did today. ''''Well, I played in the sandbox,'''' she said. The teacher said, ''''If you can spell sand, I''ll give you a fresh-baked cookie.'''' So Susie did. Then Billy came in and the teacher asked what he did. ''''I played in the sandbox with Susie,'''' he said. ''''If you can spell sand, I''ll give you a cookie,'''' the teacher said. So Billy did. Then the little Russian boy said, ''''Well, I wanted to play in the sandbox, but Billy and Susie were throwing rocks at me.'''' The teacher said, ''''Well, that sounds like discrimination. If you can spell that, I''ll give you a cookie.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid that she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde keep taking off and putting the Pepsi bottle cap back on? A: Because it said, ''''Sorry, try again.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so short, she did a suicide jump off of the curb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your IQ is so low, you have to dig for it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a restaurant, one of the customers noticed that all of the waiters had two spoons in their vest pockets. Upon being asked, one waiter said, "We see that the most frequently dropped silverware are spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement." Then the customer noticed that a string was hanging out of all the waiters'' flies and asked what the string was for. "The string is for us to go to the bathroom," explained the waiter, "that way, when we pull it, it shoots and aims right away. Then we don''t have to stop to wash our hands." The customer asked, "Well, that''s how you get it out, but how do you get it back in?" The waiter whispered confidentially, "I don''t know about the others, but I use the two spoons."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was so cold today I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the redneck die drinking milk? The cow sat on him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent, and the last instruction of the Mother Superior is that they must not get even a drop of paint on their habits. After conferring about this for a while, the two nuns decide to lock the door of the room, strip off their habits, and paint in the nude. In the middle of the project, there comes a knock at the door. "Who is it?" calls one of the nuns. "Blind man," replies a voice from the other side of the door. The two nuns look at each other and shrug, and, deciding that no harm can come from letting a blind man into the room, they open the door. "Nice gazongas," says the man, "where do you want these blinds?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one, and everyone elses'' stinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell that a blonde has been at a computer? There is lipstick on the joy stick!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why does a blonde nurse carry around a red pen? A: To draw blood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that I ran out of gas trying to drive around her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Wave!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two doctors are in the hallway complaining about nurse Nancy. ''''She''s out of control!'''' the first doctor says. ''''She does everything backwards. Just last week I told her to give a man two milligrams of morphine every ten hours. Instead, she gave him 10 milligrams every two hours. He almost died!'''' ''''That''s nothing,'''' said the second doctor, "earlier this week I told her to give a man an enema every 24 hours. Instead she tried to give him 24 enemas in one hour!'''' All of a sudden they heard a blood curldling scream from down the hallway. ''''OH MY GOD! I just realized that I told nurse Nancy to prick Mr. Smiths boil!''''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newlywed couple had just arrived in their honeymoon suite. After unpacking, the husband took off his pants. ''''Put these on,'''' he said to his wife. She did and they were nearly twice her size. ''''There''s no way I can wear these. They''re too big,'''' she said. ''''Good, now you know who wears the pants in this family.'''' Flustered, the wife takes off her panties and gives them to her husband. ''''Put these on,'''' she commands. The husband looks at the small pair of panties and says, ''''There''s no way I can get into these.'''' To which the wife replied, ''''You''re right about that until you change your attitude.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked God how much a million dollars was to him. God replied, "Oh, about one penny." Then the man asked how much an eternity was to him. God replied, "Oh, about a second." Then the man asked. "Can I have a million dollars and live an eternal life?" God replied, "Sure, just wait a sec."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day in summer, Jack was going to visit his friend John. When he got to his house, he saw John, who was dressed in his warmest winter coats. "What are you doing? Are you nuts? It''s the middle of summer!" cried Jack. "I am painting my house. And on the can, it says you must put two coats on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife had four boys. The odd part of it was that the older three had red hair, light skin, and were tall, while the youngest son had black hair, dark eyes, and was short. The father eventually took ill and was lying on his deathbed when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, before I die, be totally honest with me - is our youngest son my child?" The wife replied, "I swear on everything that''s holy that he is your son." With that the husband passed away. The wife then muttered, "Thank God he didn''t ask about the other three."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W. Bush was out jogging one morning when he tripped, fell over a bridge railing and landed in the creek below. Before the Secret Service guys could get to him, three kids who were fishing, pulled him out of the water. He was so grateful he offered the kids whatever they wanted. The first kid said, "I sure would like to go to Disneyland." George said, "No problem. I''ll take you there on Air Force One." The second kid said, "I really need a new pair of Nike Air Jordan''s." George said, "I''ll get them for you and even have Michael sign them!" The third kid said, "I want a motorized wheelchair with a built-in TV and stereo headset!!" George Bush is a little perplexed by this and says, "But you don''t look like you are injured." The kid says, "I will be after my dad finds out I saved your ass from drowning!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the baby lightbulb say to his mother? I wuv you watts and watts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo'' Mama''s teeth are so yellow, her tonsils have to wear sunglasses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so dumb she brought toilet paper to a craps game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde with two burnt ears went to the doctor, who asked what had happened. "The phone rang, and I accidentally picked up the iron." "What about the other one?" "They called back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What happens when you cross a Bulldog with a Shih tzu? A. You get Bullshit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a blonde''s mating call? NEXT!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three couples went in to see the minister to see how to become members of his church. The minister said that they would have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and tell him how it went. The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle-aged and the final couple was newlywed. Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister. The retired couple said it was no problem at all. The middle-aged couple said it was tough for the first week, but after that, it was no problem. The newlyweds said it was fine until she dropped the can of paint. "Can of PAINT!" exclaimed the minister. "Yeah," said the newlywed man. "She dropped the can and when she bent over to pick it up I had to have her right there and then. Lust took over." The minister just shook his head and said that they were not welcome in the church. "That''s okay," said the man. "We''re not welcome in Home Depot either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so ugly when she threw a boomerang it never came back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy is gone to school one day and while he is gone, his cat gets killed. His mother is very concerned about how he will take the news. Upon his arrival home, she explains the tragedy and tries to console the boy saying, "But don''t worry, the cat is in heaven with God now." To which the boy replied, "What''s God gonna'' do with a dead cat?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy''s on the electric chair. The warden''s just about to pull the switch, when the guy gets the hiccups. The warden says, "Do you have any last requests?" The guy says, "(hic) Yeah... (hic) could you please do (hic) could you please do something to scare me?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, a redhead and a blonde went to an ice cream parlor together. The brunette went up and asked for a Dr. Pepper float with no ice cream. The counter man was confused, but gave her a Dr. Pepper float with no ice cream. The redhead went up and asked for a single dip of vanilla ice cream with Pepsi poured over it. The man was really confused now. But he gave the redhead her order. The blonde was listening to the other two women and thought that she should have a ''''special order'''' too. So she went up and asked for an extra-large root beer, but hold the roots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are walking down the road when one says ''''Look at that dog with one eye!'''' The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says ''''Where?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been married for a long time, but could never get along very well. Many times, late at night, there would be screams and shouts from their house. The old man often screamed these words at her in public, "I''m sick and tired of you! When I die, I will come out of my grave to haunt you!" The old guy started practicing black magic. All the disappearances in the neighborhood of cats, dogs and people were blamed on him. At the age of 80 the old guy died, and his wife put him in a casket. Later that night, she went to a bar and partied as if there was no tomorrow. Her neighbor asked her, "Aren''t you scared that the old guy will dig up and haunt you?" The old lady calmly replied, "Eh, let him keep digging. I put the casket in face down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Six Most Important Men in a Woman''s Life THE DOCTOR, because he says, "Take your clothes off." THE DENTIST, because he says, "Open wide." THE HAIRDRESSER, because he says, "Do you want them teased or blown?" THE MILKMAN, because he says, "Do you want it in the back or in the front?" THE INTERIOR DECORATOR, because he says, "Once it''s in you''ll love it." THE BANKER, because he says, "If you take it out too soon you''ll lose interest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so dumb, she drowned during the wave at the football stadium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I''m going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are women and a tornado alike? They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ben Dover Mike Hunt Phil McCrackin Ajock Strap Anita Cock Ipe Freely Seymour Buttes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy is leaving school at the end of the day. As he strolls along the sidewalk, a car pulls up to the curb, and a man winds down the window. "Hey, kid, I''ve got candy in my car. Hop in and I''ll give it to you." "No. I''m not going to." The boy walks on. Further down the road, the car pulls over again. "Hey there kid, if you get in my car, I''ll give you all this candy, and a big bottle of cola. How about it?" "No way! Now leave me alone!" The boy walks on, quickening his pace. The car again pulls over beside him. "Look, kid, I''ve got a puppy at home you''d love to see. Get in and I''ll take you there. You can have all the candy and the cola on the way. What d''you say to that?" The boy is getting agitated. He stops walking, and leans down to the car window. "Look, I don''t care what you promise me Dad. I''m NOT riding in your Lada!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a painless way to save money, a young couple arranged that every time they have sex the husband puts his pocket change into a china piggy bank on the bedside table. One night while being unusually athletic, he accidentally knocked the piggy bank onto the floor where it smashes. To his surprise, among the masses of coins, there are handfuls of five and ten dollar bills. He asks his wife "What''s up with all the notes?", to his wife which replies, "Well, not everyone is as cheap as you are."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife want to take golf lessons from a pro at a local country club. The man and woman meet the pro and head onto the driving range. The man goes up to hit first. He swings and hits the ball 100 yards. The golf pro says not bad. Golf pro: "Now hold the club as firm as you hold your wife''s breasts". The man follows instructions and hits the ball 300 yards. The golf pro says "Excellent!" Now the woman takes her turn. Her ball goes 30 yards. Golfpro: "Not bad, try holding the club like you hold your husbands dick." She swings and the ball goes 10 yards. Golfpro: "Not bad, but now try taking the club out of your mouth and hit the ball."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two drunks get thrown out of the bar and are walking down the street when they come across this dog, sitting on the curb, licking his balls. They stand there watching and after a while one of them says, "I sure wish I could do that!" The other one looks at him and says, "Well, I think I''d pet him first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old drunks in a bar. The first one says, "Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn''t bend it with either of my hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. "By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I''m gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand" "So," says the second drunk, "what''s your point?" "Well," says the first, "I''m just wondering how much stronger I''m gonna get!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A preacher goes into a bar and says "Anybody who wants to go to heaven, stand up." Everybody stands up except for a drunk in the corner. The preacher says "My son, don''t you want to go to heaven when you die?" The drunk says "When I die? Sure. I thought you were taking a load up now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a heavy night at the pub, a drunken man decides to sleep off his drunkenness at a local hotel. He approaches the reception desk, takes care of the formalities and heads off to his suite. Several minutes later, the drunk staggers back to the reception desk and demands his room be changed. "But sir," said the clerk, "you have the best room in the hotel." "I insist on another room!!!" said the drunk. "Very good, sir. I''ll change you from 502 to 525. Would you mind telling me why you don''t like 502?" asked the clerk. "Well, for one thing," said the drunk, "it''s on fire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman had two female parrots who were always yelling, "We''re prostitutes, wanna have a little fun?" One day, she was talking to her Preacher about this. He said he had two male parrots and all they did was read the Bible. He thought perhaps they would be a good influence on the two females. So they put the four parrots together. So, the females yelled at the male parrots, "We''re prostitutes, wanna have a little fun?" One male parrot said to the other, "Put the Bibles away! We''ve made it to heaven!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On her way home from a long trip, a blonde drove past a sign that said "CLEAN RESTROOMS 8 MILES". By the time she drove eight miles, she had cleaned 43 restrooms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dentist, after completing work on a patient, came to him begging. Dentist: Could you help me? Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful screams? Patient: Why? Doctor, it wasn''t all that bad this time. Dentist: There are so many people in the waiting room right now, and I don''t want to miss the four o''clock ball game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender smiles and says "Hey, ya know we have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper stops and says "Really? You have a drink called Steve?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Borrow money from a pessimist---They don''t expect it back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does Superman''s goldfish live ? In the superbowl....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does Batman''s goldfish live ? In the BAT-TUB!! ahahaha...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an foreign man who knew a little english and lived in a hotel. One day he told the waitress "I wanta fuck" the waitress said "what!!!" I wanta fuck, I wanta fuck on the table." The waitress answered and said "you better not you son of a bitch" so the waitress left mad and never gave him a fork. The next day he went to the manager and said "I wanta shit" the manager said "what!!!" "I wanta shit, I wanta shit on my bed" the manager answered "you better not you son of a bitch" and he never got the sheet he wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What''s with the steering wheel down your pants?" "Ach," says the Irish man, "it''s drivin'' me nuts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old people, a man and a woman, walk into a hospital. The doctor says to the old man, "I''ll need a urine sample, a feces sample, and a blood sample." The old man says, "What?" So the doctor says it again. Once again the old man says, "what?" So the doctor yells it, "I NEED A URINE SAMPLE, A FECES SAMPLE, AND A BLOOD SAMPLE!" With that the old woman turns to the old man and says, "He needs a pair of your underwear!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was driving down an Alaskan road and his car broke down. He phoned the Alaskan Mobile Fixit Service and they arrived shortly after. He service man opened the bonnet and after a while the repair man said " It looks like you''ve blown a seal ", the man replies "No, it''s just frost on my moustache."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two atoms are walking down the street when one atom says to the other, "I think I lost an electron." The other atom says "Are you sure?" "Yeah I''m positive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pretty woman in Poland? A tourist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is worst tasting, a bag of onions or porkloaf? Porkloaf, why? Because porkloaf spelled backwards is faolkrop which sounds like fowl crap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Hey! Now there''s a gift! 9. Well, well, well... 8. Boy, if I had not recently shot up 4 sizes that would''ve fit. 7. This is perfect for wearing around the basement. 6. Gosh. I hope this never catches fire! It is fire season though. There are lots of unexplained fires. 5. If the dog buries it, I''ll be furious! 4. I love it - but I fear the jealousy it will inspire. 3. Sadly, tomorrow I enter the Federal Witness Protection Program. 2. To think I got this the year I vowed to give all my gifts to charity. 1. I really don''t deserve this', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Can I pull my car in your garage? I''m not sure how long that cop car will stay lost. 9. There ain''t nothing that beats that great feeling of knowing your HIV test results are negative! I bet Sara''s will be okay too. 8. Nice place you got here. That painting looks expensive. I bet a nice home like this came with a safe already built in, didn''t it? 7. Sara is so pretty I''ve decided to give up being bisexual just for her. 6. Those home pregnancy kits aren''t very reliable in my opinion. 5. We''re going to keep our relationship quiet for now. My wife can be rather vindictive at times. 4. Can you believe it! Those shit heads at the corner market won''t cash my welfare check! 3. Which one of you taught Sara to give such great head? 2. Did you see that saucer that flew over town yesterday? 1. My parole officer thinks Sara has a calming effect on me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you''re only allowed one seat." The man groaned but didn''t budge. The usher became impatient. "Sir, if you don''t get up from there I''m going to have to call the manager." Again, the man just groaned, which infuriated the usher who turned and marched briskly back up the aisle in search of his manager. In a few moments, both the usher and the manager returned and stood over the man. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move him, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what''s your name?" "Sam," the man moaned. "Where ya from, Sam?" With pain in his voice Sam replied "The balcony."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom''s so fat, I have to take a bus a train and a cab just to get on her good side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom''s so fat she can''t even jump to a conclusion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother''s so fat, when she goes to a restaurant she looks at the menu and says, "OK"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman was patrolling a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw a couple inside with the dome light on. There was a young man in the driver''s seat reading a computer magazine and a young lady in the back seat knitting. He stopped to investigate. He walked up to the driver''s window and knocked. The young man looked up, cranked the window down, and said, "Yes, Officer?" "What are you doing?" the policeman asked. "What does it look like?" answered the young man. "I''m reading this magazine." Pointing towards the young lady in the back seat, the officer then asked, "And what is she doing?" The young man looked over his shoulder and replied, "What does it look like? She''s knitting." "And how old are you?" the officer then asked the young man. "I''m nineteen," he replied. "And how old is she?" asked the officer. The young man looked at his watch and said, "Well, in about twelve minutes she''ll be sixteen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was trying hard to get the catsup to come out of the bottle. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "It''s the minister, Mommy," the child said to her mother. Then she added, "Mommy can''t come to the phone right now. She''s hitting the bottle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How''s it work?" "Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, "Knock it off, you idiot! It''s two o''clock in the morning!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young bride and groom-to-be had just selected their wedding rings. As the young lady admired the plain platinum and diamond band she had chosen for herself, she suddenly looked concerned. "Tell me," she asked the rather elderly salesman, "is there anything special I''ll have to do to take care of this ring?" With a fatherly smile, the salesman said, "One of the best ways to protect a wedding ring is to soak it in dishwater."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The young clerk''s responsibilities included bringing the judge a hot cup of coffee at the start of every day. Each morning the judge was enraged that the coffee cup arrived two-thirds full. The clerk explained that he had to rush to get the coffee delivered while it was still hot, which caused him to spill much of it along the way. None of the judge''s yelling and insults produced a full cup of coffee, until he finally threatened to cut the clerk''s pay by one-third if he continued to produce one-third less than the judge wanted. The next morning he was greeted with a cup of coffee that was full to the brim, and the next morning and the morning after that. The judge couldn''t resist gloating over his success and smugly complimented the clerk on his new technique. "Oh, there''s not much to it," admitted the clerk happily, "I take some coffee in my mouth right outside the coffee room, and spit it back in when I get outside your office."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking to him for while, he tells his daughter she can''t do it because he''s her half brother. The same problem happens again four more times! The girl starts to get pissed off. She goes to her mom and says, "Mom... What have you been doing all your life? Dad''s been going around laying every maiden in the town and now I can''t marry any of the five guys I like because they have turned out to be my half brothers!!!" Her mom replies, "Don''t worry darling, you can marry any one of them you want, he isn''t really your dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher of the Earth Science class was lecturing on map reading. He spent the class explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes. Towards the end of class, the teacher asked his students, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude..." A student''s voice broke the confused silence, and volunteered, "I guess you''d be eating alone, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A highly timid little man, ventured into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?" A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his body hair growing out through the seams, turned slowly on his stool, looked down at the quivering little man and said, "It''s my dog. Why?" "Well," squeaked the little man, obviously very nervous, "I believe my dog just killed it, sir." "What?" roared the big man in disbelief. "What in the hell kind of dog do you have?" "Sir," answered the little man, "it''s a little four week old female puppy." "Bull!" roared the biker, "how could your puppy kill my Doberman?" "It appears that your dog choked on her, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two ducks walk into a bar... One duck looks at the other and says "Guess you didn''t see it either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A test-tube baby has a womb with a view.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a lawyer can be disbarred can a musician be denoted or a model deposed?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can''t stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are real comments made by teachers on their student report cards: 1. Since my last report, your child has hit rock bottom and has started to dig. 2. I would not allow this student to breed. 3. Your child has delusions of adequacy. 4. Your child is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. 5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them. 6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together. 7. This child has been working with glue too much. 8. When your daughter''s IQ reaches 50, she should sell. 9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn''t coming. 10. If this student were any more stupid, he''d have to be watered twice a week. 11. It''s impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others. 12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. After a few more he needs to go to the can. He doesn''t want anyone to steal his drink, so he puts a sign on it saying, "I spat in this beer, do not drink!" After a few minutes he returns and there is another sign next to his beer saying, "So did I!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama so fat that when she goes swimming in the ocean all the whales start singing, "We are familly even though you fatter than me".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your dad''s bald spot is so big you could draw an H on it and call it a helicopter landing pad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call something with 4 eyes, 3 noses, 7 ears, and 2 mouths? Ugly!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It''s not appropriate to say the word ''pee'' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to ''pee'' just tell me that you have to ''whisper.''" The following Sunday, the little boy went to church with his father and during the service said to his father, "Daddy, I have to whisper." The father looked at him and said, "Okay, why don''t you whisper in my ear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a boy standing on a corner selling fish. He was saying, "Dam fish for sale, dam fish for sale." A preacher walked up and asked why he was calling them dam fish. The kid said, "I caught them at the dam, so they''re dam fish." The preacher bought some, took them home and asked his wife to cook the dam fish. His wife looked at him in bewilderment and said, "Preachers aren''t supposed to talk like that." The preacher explained why they were dam fish, and she agreed to cook them. When dinner was ready and everyone was sitting down, the preacher asked his son to pass him the dam fish. His son replied, "That''s the spirit dad. Pass the fucking potatoes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. If I like it, it''s mine. 2. If it''s in my hand, it''s mine. 3. If I can take it from you, it''s mine. 4. If I had it a little while ago, it''s mine. 5. If it''s mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way. 6. If I''m doing or building something, all of the pieces are mine. 7. If it looks like mine, it''s mine. 8. If I saw it first, it''s mine. 9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine. 10. If it''s broken, it''s yours. Also... 11. If you built it, I get to knock it down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one has to drop off, otherwise they are all going to fall. They were not able to choose that person, but then the woman made a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because as woman she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, and for men in general, without ever getting anything in return. As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy and his father were playing catch in the front yard when the boy saw a honey bee. He ran over and stomped it. "That was a honey bee," his father said, "one of our friends. For stomping him you will do without honey for a week." Later the boy saw a butterfly, so he ran over and stomped it. "That was a butterfly," his father said, "one of our friends, and for stomping him you will do without butter for a week." The next morning the family sat down for breakfast. The boy ate his plain toast with no honey or butter. Suddenly a cockroach ran out from under the stove. His mother stomped it. The boy looked at his father and said, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or should I?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Israeli soldier who just enlisted asked the Commanding Officer for a 3-day pass. The CO says "Are you crazy? You just join the Israeli army, and you already want a 3-day pass? You must do something spectacular for that recognition!" So the soldier comes back a day later in an Arab tank! The CO was so impressed, he asked "How did you do it?" "Well, I jumped in a tank, and went toward the border with the Arabs. I approached the border, and saw an Arab tank. I put my white flag up, the Arab tank put his white flag up. I said to the Arab soldier, ''Do you want to get a three-day pass?'' So we exchanged tanks!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow''s ear. The farmer didn''t think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket. So the farmer says "Oh, shoot! It went in one ear and out the udder"...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many roaches does it take to screw in a lightbulb???? A: Since when do roaches screw in lightbulbs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bubblegum cross the road? Because he was stuck to the chickens leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did President George W. Bush go into a gorilla''s nest in the jungle? To be with his family!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fitted under his shirt and was not noticeable at all. On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school. Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with desk work. The classroom became a bit unruly and he admonished them. This happened several times. When he could do work at his desk, the strong breeze from the window made his tie flap annoyingly. He kept rearranging and rearranging the tie as the class raised its level of unruliness. Finally, becoming disgusted with the wayward tie, he stood up and took a big stapler off his desk and stapled the tie to his chest in several places. Discipline was not a problem from that day forth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very dirty little fellow came in from playing in the yard and asked his mother, "Who am I? " Ready to play the game she said, "I don''t know! Who are you?" "WOW!" cried the child. "Mrs. Johnson was right! She said I was so dirty, my own mother wouldn''t recognize me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was about to die, so he went to a black magic store to get a voodoo dick. The man at the store said, "It works. Anything you tell it to go to, it goes. So your wife can just say, ''Voodoo dick, my pussy.''" The man buys it and gives it to his wife. She says, "Voodoo dick, my pussy." It goes in and starts screwing. But she doesn''t know how to get it out. So she speeds to the hospital, but a cop catches her. He says, "What''s the hurry?" She says, "There''s a voodoo dick stuck in my pussy." The cop says, "Voodoo dick, my ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and wife are out shopping one day. The wife turns to her husband and says; "Darling it''s my mum''s birthday tomorrow what shall we get her? Perhaps something electric?" "A chair?" replies the husband.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe and Ted finished an exam and talked to each other afterwards. "I did terrible," said Joe. "I think I was filling in the wrong bubbles!" "Me too," replied Ted. "Well, why did you do terrible?" asked Joe. "I forgot to bring a pencil!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a City cop on his horse waiting to cross the street when a little boy on his new shiny bike stopped beside him. "Nice bike," the cop said "Did Santa bring it to you?" "Yep," the little boy said, "He sure did!" The cop looked the bike over and handed the boy a $20.00 ticket for a safety violation. The cop said, "Next year tell Santa to put a reflector light on the back of it." The young boy looked up at the cop and said "Nice horse you got there, Sir. Did Santa bring it to you?" "Yes, he sure did," chuckled the cop. The little boy looked up at the cop and said, "Next year tell Santa the d*ck goes underneath the horse not on top."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Though the walls of our apartment complex aren''t particularly thin, the floors and ceilings act as amplifiers. One night, several months ago, my wife and I were lying in bed. Noticing the repeated constant sound of a bed scooting along the floor and a headboard banging against a wall, we became aware that the occupants of the bedroom directly were doing more than tossing and turning in their sleep. This went on for some time. Later we described the event to our friends. US: "For the first five minutes, it was funny and kind of embarrassing that we could hear them so well. "After about ten minutes, it became really annoying. "After fifteen minutes, it was getting very frustrating because it was keeping us from going to sleep..." FRIENDS: "And then?" US: "And then after twenty straight minutes...Okay, after twenty minutes it was pretty damn impressive."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: I got a problem. Ed: What''s the matter? Joe: Women. I just don''t understand them. Ed: Do you understand your TV? Joe: No. Ed: So what''s the problem?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher has set the class an assignment. He stresses the importance of the particular assignment, and that no excuses will be accepted except illness (with a medical certificate) or a death in the immediate family (with a note from that member). A smart-ass student pipes up: "What about extreme sexual exhaustion, sir?" The class breaks up laughing, and when they settle down the teacher responds with: "Well, Jones, I guess you''ll have to learn to write with your other hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces "I''m looking for the man who shot my paw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I half a spelling checker, It came with my pea sea; It plainly marks four my revue, Mistakes I kin not sea. I''ve run this poem threw it, I''m sure your please two no, Its letter perfect in it''s weigh, My checker tolled me sew.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eager to make full use of my new computer''s capabilities, I asked a customer-service representative at my bank whether it offered on-line banking. "Certainly," she stated matter-of-factly, pointing to a crowd of people near the tellers. "The line starts over there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend was on duty in the main computer lab on a quiet afternoon he noticed a young woman sitting in front of one of the workstations with her arms crossed across her chest, staring at the screen. After about 15 minutes he noticed that she was still in the same position, only now she was impatiently tapping her foot. Finally, he approached her and asked if she needed help. She replied, "It''s about time! I pressed the F1 button over twenty minutes ago!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock! Knock! Who''s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up and let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman pulls over a reckless driver along the road. Going up to the driver''s window, he takes one look and notes, "Your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?" The driver looks up out of those bloodshot eyes and responds, "Your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating donuts?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Officer: "And you still insist you''re innocent, in spite of the fact that we have six witnesses to the crime ?" Offender: "If it''s witnesses you want, I can produce seventy people who didn''t see me steal the stuff."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Dean from the University of Northern Colorado was a victim of a hit and run. He was just getting to his feet when a policeman ran up to help. "My mother-in-law just tried to run me over!" the shaken Dean told the cop. "The car hit you from behind," the officer said. "How could you tell it was your mother-in-law?" "I recognized the laugh!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A butcher was minding his store one day, when a dog ran in and stole a cut of meat off his counter. The butcher recognized the dog as belonging to his neighbor, who was a lawyer. He called up his neighbor and said, "Your dog stole meat from my store. I believe you owe me for the meat." The lawyer said, " You are correct. How much was the meat?" The butcher told him that it cost $4.50, the lawyer replied that he should receive a check for that amount in the mail the next day. The next day, the check arrived in the mail for $4.50, with a bill attached for $150, "for legal consultation".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter: Mother: "What does the cow say?" Child: "Moooo!" Mother: "Great! What does the cat say?" Child: "Meow." Mother: "Oh, you''re so smart! What does the frog say?" The wide-eyed little three-year-old looked up at her mother and replied, Child: "Bud."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always on the look-out for a bargain, I was dining out and came across a menu entree "T-Bone* $4.25". I inquired of the waiter how they could sell a dinner at that price. He advised me to check the bottom of the menu. Next to the "*" was "with meat, $14.95"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is it Michael Jackson''s bed time? When the little hand meets the big hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call happiness? Seeing your mother-in-law''s photo on the back of a milk carton!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an alchoholic & a drug addict? The alchoholic drives over the stop sign, while the drug addict waits for it to turn green.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Barry calls his boss. "I''m having problems with my eyes." "What''s wrong with them?" his boss asks. "I just can''t see myself coming into work today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I wanted to think of a better come back, I''d dig it out of your @$$!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and a Newfie walked into a pub together. They proceeded to each buy a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the foam. The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust. The Scotsman fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened. The Newfie too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer and then started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU THIEF!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio? It took her a month to realize she could play it at night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in spring training.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA? "Look! They have spelt MACY''S wrong!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the difference between a paycheck and your dick ? A. You don''t have to beg a woman to blow your paycheck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What are the small bumps around a woman''s'' nipples for ? A. They are Braille for "suck here".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the difference between a woman and a coffin ? A. You come in one and go in the other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do women close their eyes during sex ? A. They can''t stand seeing a man have a good time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the difference between your wife and your job ? A. After 5 years your job will still suck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the best thing about a blow job ? A. Ten minutes of silence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How is a woman like a laxative ? A. They both irritate the shit out of you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do husbands die before their wives ? A. They want to', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the difference between a woman with PMS and a pitbull ? A. Lipstick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. What do you mean "today''s our anniversary"? 9. Can we not talk to each other tonight? I''d rather just watch TV. 8. Ohh, this diamond is way too big! 7. And for our honeymoon we''re going fishing in Alaska! 6. Can our relationship get a little more physical? I''m tired of being "just friends". 5. Honey does this outfit make my butt look too small? 4. Aww, don''t stop for directions, I''m sure you''ll be able to figure out how to get there. 3. Is that phone for me? Tell ''em I''m not here. 2. I don''t care if it is on sale, 300 dollars is too much for a designer dress. 1. Hey, pull my finger!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife are celebrating their 50th anniversary. That night the wife approaches her husband wearing the exact same sexy little negligee she wore on their wedding night. She looks at her husband and says, "Honey,do you remember this?" He looks up at her and says, "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night we were married." She says, "Yes, that''s right. Do you remember what you said to me that night." He nods and says, "Yes dear, I still remember." "Well, what was it?" she asks. He responds, "Well honey, as I remember, I said, "Ohhhhhhhhh Baby, I''m going to suck the life out of those big tits and screw your brains out." She giggles and says, "Yes honey, that''s it. That''s exactly what you said. So, now it''s 50 years later, I''m in the same negligee I wore that night. What do you have to say tonight?" Again he looks up at her and looks her up and down and replies, "Mission Accomplished."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a pack of Indians and the Indian Chief could never seem to fart. So eventually he got one of his Indian people to call up a doctor and tell him "Big Chief no fart!". So the doctor came up the next day with a pill and he says "Here, take this and call me the next day to tell me what happened." So the Indian calls back up the next day and says "Still, Big Chief no fart!" So the doctor brought up an even bigger pill. The next day the Indian calls the doctor up and says "Once again, Big Chief no fart!". So the doctor had enough of this and brought this HUGE pill, I mean this pill had to be taken in by tanks. So the next day the Indian calls up the doctor and says..."BIG FART, NO CHIEF!!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to his dentist because he has a strange feeling in his mouth. The dentist examines him and says, "That new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?" The man replies, "All I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious...Hollandaise sauce. I loved it so much I now put it on everything - meat, toast, fish, vegtables, everything." "Well," says the dentist, "That''s probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. It has eaten away your upper plate. I''ll make you a new plate, and this time use chrome." "Why chrome?" asks the patient. To which the dentist replies, "It''s simple. Everyone knows that there''s no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. He retired following a happy thirty-year career. Shortly thereafter his company contacted him about a seemingly impossible problem with one of their million-dollar machines. The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. After spending a day studying the huge machine, he marked a small "X" in chalk on a machine component and proudly stated, "This is where your problem is." The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly. The company was astounded to receive a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his service. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges. The engineer responded briefly: One chalk mark ..............$1 Knowing where to put it .....$49,999', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That wife of mine is a liar, said the angry husband to a sympathetic pal seated next to him in the bar. "How do you know?" the friend asked. "She didn''t come home last night, and when I asked her where she''d been, she said she''d spent the night with her sister, Shirley." "So?" the friend replied. "So, she''s a liar. I spent the night with her sister Shirley!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were 2 guys who were best friends, Bob and Carl, that went walking everyday past a very fancy restuarant made up of very clear, expensive glass. Well everytime they went by, they would always make jokes about the rich snobs who dined there (of course because they were jealous because they wanted to be in there eating the expensive food). So one day Bob made a bet with Carl that he could make half of the people throw up. As soon as Carl agreed on the bet, Bob went and put his boogers and some dog poop all over the glass and indeed half of the people did throw up. So Carl lost some money but wanted to get it back. So he made a bet the he could get the other half of the people to throw up. Bob thought there is no way of doing this but he did. Carl went up and licked it all off! And in the end they both broke even. The End (lol)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service, the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan! They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive! She lives for ten more years, and then dies. Once again, a ceremony is held, and at the end of it, the pall bearers are again carrying out the casket. As they carry the casket towards the door, the husband cries out: "Watch that fucking wall!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde says to a brunette, ''''Excuse me, but each time I sip my coffee, my eye seems to hurt.'''' The brunette says, ''''Well maybe you should take the spoon out of the cup.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a very old man, whose verses no one could scan. And when they asked, "Why?" he said, "I don''t know, I "just put too many words in the last line, I guess."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an old man from Purdue whose limericks stopped on line two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineer, a systems analyst, and a programmer were on their way to a tech conference on the other side of the mountains. Half way down the other side, the brakes gave out, and the engineer steered for all his life to keep the car from going clean off the edge. It was at the last second, skidding sideways towards doom, that the car finally stopped. One tire dropped over the edge. The three sprang from the car, shaking and panting. The engineer was the first to speak. "We could have been killed! I would like to get under the car and see just what happened to those brakes. Something has to be fixed." The systems analyst agreed. "Yes, but I''d like to see the design blueprints. We could fix the problem with these cars with a little research." The programmer was scratching his head. "I wonder if that''s repeatable."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Scot and Mick Jagger? Mick Jagger sang "Hey, you, get offa my cloud." The Scot says "Hey, McCloud, get offa my ewe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walked into a library and said to the librarian, "Can I have some fish and chips please?" The librarian gave her a funny look and said, " I''m sorry, this is a library." So the blonde whispers,"Can I have some fish and chips please?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blonde, a brunette and a red head on an island and they were almost starving. In the end the brunette decided she would rather die trying to get back to land, which looked about 20 miles away, than stay on the island and starve. So she started swimmming and got about 10 miles out before she gave up and drowned. The red head decided she would do the same thing and she got 15 miles out before she gave up and drowned. The blonde was lonely without the others so she swam out and got 19 miles out. "Oh, I''m too tired!" she said. So she swam back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a curio store and was shopping around. After awhile, a golden rat interested him and he went to purchase it. "That''ll be $20 for the rat and $1,000 for the story behind it," said the shop owner. "Thanks, but I''ll just take the rat for $20 and leave the story". He bought the golden rat and left the store. While walking down the street, he saw all sorts of rats following him. The further he walked, even more rats came. He went down to the docks and still more rats ran out and followed him. So he walked out into the water, and all the rats drowned. He returned to the curio store soon after. "Sooo," said the proprietor. "You''ve come back for the story, I thought so!" "Nope," said the man. "Got any golden lawyers?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man arrives at his laywer''s funeral and and was very dismayed by the presence of this one person. He turns to the people around him. ''Why are you all at this man''s funeral?'' A man turns towards him and says, ''We''re all clients.'' ''And you ALL came to pay your respects? How touching.'' ''Huh? No, we came to make sure he was dead.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she plays hopscotch like this: "Washington, California..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a horse''s favourite Shakepearean play? Rodeo and Juliet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s the day''s stock market report: Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary. Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading. Knives were up sharply. Cows steered into a bull market. Pencils lost a few points. Hiking equipment was trailing. Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline. Weights were up in heavy trading. Light switches were off. Mining equipment hit rock bottom. Diapers remained unchanged. Shipping lines stayed at an even keel. The market for raisins dried up. Coca Cola fizzled. Caterpillar stock inched up a bit. Sun peaked at midday. Rain dampened the rally. Balloon prices were inflated. Scott Tissue touched a new bottom. And batteries exploded in an attempt to recharge the market.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It seems the US Federal Aviation Administration has a unique device for testing the strength of windshields on irplanes. The device is a gun that launches a dead chicken at a plane''s windshield at approximately the speed the plane flies. The theory is that if the windshield doesn''t crack from the carcass impact, it''ll survive a real collision with a bird during flight. It seems the British were very interested in this and wanted to test a windshield on a brand new, speedy locomotive they were developing. They borrowed the FAA''s chicken launcher, loaded the chicken and fired. The ballistic chicken shattered the windshield, went through the engineer''s chair, broke an instrument panel and embedded itself in the back wall of the engine cab. The British were stunned and asked the FAA to recheck the test to see if everything was done correctly. The FAA reviewed the test thoroughly and had one recommendation: "Use a thawed chicken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma''s like the Bermuda Triangle, they both swallow a lot of seamen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma''s like a fine restaurant, she only takes deliveries in the rear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s like a bubble gum machine, 5 cents a blow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. "Tim, you be first" she said. "What does your mother do all day?" Tim stood up and proudly said, "She''s a doctor." "That''s wonderful. How about you, Amie?" Amie shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman." "Thank you, Amie," said the teacher. "What about your father, Billy?" Billy proudly stood up and announced, "My daddy works in a topless bar!" The teacher was aghast and promptly changed the subject to geography. Later that day she went to Billy''s house and rang the bell. Billy''s father answered the door. The teacher explained what his son had said and demanded an explanation. Billy''s father said, "I''m actually an attorney. But, how can I explain that to a seven-year-old?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they bury lawyers 10 feet below ground instead of the usual 6? Because deep down, they''re not so bad!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is heavier, 20 pounds of rocks or 20 pounds of sugar? Their both 20 pounds! doy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Better to be pissed off than pissed on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond got a new job cutting down trees. On the first day her boss handed her a chainsaw and said, "Now you have to go into that forest and cut down as many trees as possible using that chain saw. Please be careful with it and also please remember that the minimum is 6 trees a day." The blonde went into the forest and cut down trees but at the end of the day she had only managed to cut down 4. Her boss decided to give another chance but the next day she only managed 3. He decided to give her one last chance but on the third day she only cut two trees. When she finished work, he called the blond over and took her back into the forest. "Right,"he said,"You must be doing something wrong here so watch how I do it, then I''ll give you one more chance before you''re fired. So he stood in front of the tree and started up the chainsaw. The blond looked around suddenly and said, "What''s that noise?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? time to get a new fence!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pig who knows karate? A Pork-Chop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old country gentleman and his wife were out driving one day, when a police officer pulled him over. "What seems to be the trouble young man?" asked the old gentleman. The officer said, "Excuse me sir, but didn''t you notice your wife fell out of the car back there?" To which the old gentleman exclaimed, "Thank you son, I thought I went deaf!!!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Grass is green. You have the shape Of a washing machine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and has holes in it? Swiss shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it takes to screw in a lightbulb? three: one to unscrew it one to buy a new lightbulb one to call her boyfriend to screw it back in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Definition of Agony? One armed man hanging off a cliff with itchy balls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: Hi Jack. How did you like horseback riding? Jack: Not that much. The problem was that the horse was too polite. Joe: Polite? Jack: Yep. When we reached the fence he let me go over first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been married 15 years. One afternoon they were working in the garden together. As the wife was bending over pulling weeds the husband said, "Hey honey, you are getting fat. Your butt is getting huge. I bet it''s as big as the gas grill now." The husband feeling he needed to prove his point, got a yardstick, measured the grill and then measured his wife''s butt. "Yep," he said, "Just what I thought, just about the same size." The wife got very incensed and decided to let him do the gardening alone. She went inside and didn''t speak to her husband the rest of the day. That evening when they went to bed, the husband cuddled up to his wife and said, "How about it, hon? How about a little lovemaking?" The wife rolled over and turned her back to him, giving him the cold shoulder. "What''s the matter?" he asked. To which she replied, "You don''t think I''m going to fire up this big gas grill for one little weenie, do you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It has been determined. The most used sexual position for married couples is a doggie position. The husband sits and begs. The wife rolls over and plays dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For weeks a six-year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house. One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements of the unborn child. The six-year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacher about the impending event. The teacher finally sat the boy on her lap and said, "Tommy, whatever has become of that baby brother or sister you were expecting at home?" Tommy burst into tears and confessed, "I think Mommy ate it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little nine-year-old girl was in church with her mother when she started feeling ill. "Mommy" she said "Can we leave now?" "No," her mother replied. "Well, I think I have to throw up!" "Then go out the front door and around to the back of the church and throw up behind a bush." In about two minutes the little girl returned to her seat. "Did you throw up?" her mother asked. "Yes," the little girl replied. "Well, how could you have gone all the way to the back of the church and return so quickly?" "I didn''t have to go out of the church, Mommy," the little girl replied, "They have a box next to the front door that says ''for the sick''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Peterson phoned the repairman because her dishwasher quit working. He couldn''t accommodate her with an "after-hours" appointment and since she had to go to work, she told him, "I''ll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dish washer, leave the bill on the counter, and I''ll mail you a check. By the way, I have a large rotweiler inside named Killer; he won''t bother you. I also have a parrot, and whatever you do, do not talk to the bird!" Well, sure enough the dog, Killer, totally ignored the repairman, but the whole time he was there, the parrot cursed, yelled, screamed, and about drove him nuts. As he was ready to leave, he couldn''t resist saying, "You stupid bird, why don''t you shut up!" To which the bird replied, "Killer, get him!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During training exercises, the lieutenant who was driving down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud with a red-faced colonel at the wheel. "Your jeep stuck, sir?" asked the lieutenant as he pulled alongside. "Nope," replied the colonel, coming over and handing him the keys, "Yours is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, "What time is it?" The tower responded, "Who is calling?" The aircraft replied, "What difference does it make?" The tower replied "It makes a lot of difference. If it is an American Airlines flight, it is 3 o''clock. If it is an Air Force plane, it is 1500 hours. If it is a Navy aircraft, it is 6 bells. If it is an Army aircraft, the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 3. If it is a Marine Corps aircraft, it''s Thursday afternoon and 120 minutes to "Happy Hour".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (NULL, '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walked up to a beautiful young woman in a bar. "Do you mind if I ask you a personal question?" he said to her. "I don''t know," replied the beautiful young woman. "It depends how personal it is." "OK," the guy said. "How many men have you slept with?" "I''m not going to tell you that!" the woman exclaimed. "That''s my business!" "Sorry," said the guy, "I didn''t realize you made a living out of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few rules for what women can and cannot wear at a private pool. 1) Thongs are encouraged... however only if certain conditions are met. 1A) There must be a direct correlation to the amount of total square inches of skin, to the total amount of square inches of bathing suit. In other words, if you are any larger than a mini van, a string bikini should be frowned upon. 1B) Thongs or ass floss as they have been come to be known in pool and beach circles, should be worn as long as there is not more cellulite on your buttocks than in one of Mel Gibson''s Epic type movies. 2) Women with near perfect figures, cannot wear one piece bathing suits... plain and simple. Damn, I know it''s a sexist world, but it''s the world that we live in. 3) Curlers are strictly verboten.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hours after the end of the world, a border dispute emerged between heaven and hell. God, invited the devil for conversations to find a way to resolve this dispute quickly. Satan proposed a soccer game between heaven and hell. God, always fair, said to the devil, "The heat must be affecting your brain, the game would be so one sided. Don''t you know all the ''good'' players go to heaven?" The devil, smiling, responded "Yeah, but we''ve got all the refs!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you studied for a blood test!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mafioso''s son sits at his desk writing a Christmas list to Jesus. He first writes, "Dear baby Jesus, I have been a good boy the whole year, so I want a new..." He looks at it, then crumples it up into a ball and throws it away. He gets out a new piece of paper and writes again, "Dear baby Jesus, I have been a good boy for most of the year, so I want a new..." He again looks at it with disgust and throws it away. He then gets an idea. He goes into his mother''s room, takes a statue of the Virgin Mary, puts it in the closet, and locks the door. He takes another piece of paper and writes, "Dear baby Jesus. If you ever want to see your mother again..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children in the back of the car cause accidents. Accidents in the back of the car cause children', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks out of a bar totally hammered, only to be greeted by a snobby woman. She takes one look at him. "You, sir, are drunk!" "And you ma''am, are ugly. But when I wake up, I will be sober!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A small boy and his father were visiting a nearby mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny silver walls that moved apart and back together again by themselves. The lad asked, "What is this, father?" The father (having never seen an elevator) responded, "I have no idea what it is." While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheelchair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched as small circles lit up above the walls. The walls opened up again and a beautiful twenty-four-year-old woman stepped out. The father looked at his son anxiously and said, "Go get your mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A devoted wife had spent her lifetime taking care of her husband. Now he had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to his senses, he motioned for her to come near him. As she sat by him, he said, ''''You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?'''' ''''What, my dear?'''' she asked gently. ''''I think you bring me bad luck.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses. -Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship. -Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails, sloths, and elephants. -Bathhouses are against the law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same parrot and it said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." She was incredibly ticked now. The next day the same parrot again said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and kill the bird. The store manager replied, "That''s not good," and promised he wouldn''t say it again. When the lady walked past the store that day after work the parrot called to her, "Hey lady." She paused and said, "Yes?" The bird said, "You know."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES. The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop - it read... MAIN ENTRANCE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the supermarket was a man pushing a cart which contained a screaming, bellowing baby. The gentleman kept repeating softly, "Don''t get excited, Albert; don''t scream, Albert; don''t yell, Albert; keep calm, Albert." A woman standing next to him said, "You certainly are to be commended for trying to soothe your son, Albert." The man looked at her and said, "Lady, I''m Albert."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young gay man calls home and tells his Jewish mother that he has decided to go back into the closet because he has met a wonderful girl and they are going to be married. He tells his mother that he is sure she will be happier since he knows that his gay lifestyle has been very disturbing to her. She responds that she is indeed delighted and asks tentatively, "I suppose it would be too much to hope that she would be Jewish?" He tells her that not only is the girl Jewish, but is from a wealthy Beverly Hills family. She admits she is overwhelmed by the news, and asks, "What is her name?" He answers, "Monica Lewinsky." There is a long pause, then his mother asks, "What happened to that nice Catholic boy you were dating last year?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) How many jugglers does it take to change a lightbulb? A) One, but it takes 3 lightbulbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)Where do penguins go to dance? A)The snowball', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)Where do eskimo pigs live? A)In a pigloo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)Why does a traffic light turn red? A)You would to if you had to change in front of all those people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)what do you call a polar bear in the jungle? A)lost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)A hippo is sitting on your chair....what time is it? A)Time to get a new chair', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when a rooster crosses a duck? A: A bird that gets up at the quack of dawn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.Why shouldn''t you wear snow boots? A.Because they will melt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why would Snow White be a good judge? A.Because she''s the fairest in the land.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.Where do tough chickens come from? A.Hard boiled eggs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.Why did the house go to the doctor? A.To get a cure for his window pane!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the chef name his son? Stu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you fix a broken tomato? With tomato paste!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After spending time with Eve, Adam was walking in the Garden with God. Adam told God how much the woman means to him and how blessed he feels to have her. Adam began to ask questions about her. Adam: Lord, Eve is beautiful. Why did you make her so beautiful? God: So you will always want to look at her. Adam: Lord, her skin is so soft. Why did you make her skin so soft? God: So you will always want to touch her. Adam: She always smells so good. Lord, why did you make her smell so good? God: So you will always want to be near her. Adam: That''s wonderful Lord ... and I don''t want to seem ungrateful, but why did you make her so stupid? God: So she would love you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the lion say to his friends before they go out hunting for food? "Let us prey."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a snail who was sick and tired of his reputation for being so slow. He decided to get some fast wheels to make up the difference. After shopping around a while, he decided that the Ferraro 240-Z was the car to get. So the snail goes to the nearest Ferraro dealer and says he wants to buy the 240-Z, but he wants it repainted "240-S". The dealer asks, "Why ''S''?" The snail replies, "''S'' stands for snail. I want everybody who sees me roaring past to know who''s driving." Well, the dealer doesn''t want to lose the unique opportunity to sell a car to a snail, so he agrees to have the car repainted for a small fee. The snail gets his new car and spent the rest of his days roaring happily down the highway at top speed. And whenever anyone would see him zooming by, they''d say "Wow! Look at that S-car go!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cat say to the elephant? "......................meOW!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tone paint work - Original color and rust. "One careful owner" - But the other nine were clumsy as anything. "10,000 trouble-free miles" - Crashed in the last 20 feet. "Heated rear window" - So you don''t get cold hands when push-starting the thing in winter. "Very clean" - Only washed if and when it rains. "Lady owner" - The glove box is full of half-used cosmetics. "Clean interior" - All the rubbish is under the floormats. "Immobilizer" - The gear shift comes off in your hand. "Anti-theft device" - I can let you have a Rottweiler cheap. "Drives beautifully" - ... in a straight line; the steering is all over the place. "Low mileage" - The odometer is on its third time around. "Full service history" - Charlie in the garage round the corner checked it over last week. "Economical" - Doesn''t use much fuel, as it can''t go any faster than 30 mph.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman: Honey, do you love me? Man: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies! Woman: Do I look fat in this? Man: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies! Woman: Did you enjoy the meal? Man: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies! Woman: Do you see the wrinkles on my face? Man: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies! Man: Do you wanna fool around tonight? Woman: Sure Honey! Man: Was it as good for you as it was for me? Woman: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl went out on a date with a trumpet player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was it? Did his embouchure make him a great kisser?" "Nah," the first girl replied. "That dry, tight, tiny little pucker; it was no fun at all." The next night she went out with a tuba player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?" "Ugh!" the first girl exclaimed. "Those huge, rubbery, blubbery, slobbering slabs of meat; oh, it was just gross!" The next night she went out with a French horn player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?" "Well," the first girl replied, "his kissing was just so-so; but I loved the way he held me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the middle of a forest, there was a hunter who was suddenly confronted by a huge, mean bear. In his fear, all attempts to shoot the bear were unsuccessful. Finally, he turned and ran as fast as he could. The hunter ran and ran and ran, until he ended up at the edge of a very steep cliff. His hopes were dim. Seeing no way out of his predicament, and with the bear closing in rather quickly, the hunter got down on his knees, opened his arms, and exclaimed, "Dear God! Please give this bear some religion!" The skies darkened and there was lightning in the air. Just a few feet short of the hunter, the bear came to an abrupt stop, and glanced around, somewhat confused. Suddenly, the bear looked up into the sky and said, "Thank you, God, for the food I''m about to receive...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An epileptic young woman named Camp Was seduced on her couch by a tramp But the first time he squeezed her She had a Grand seizure And broke both his balls and a lamp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horny old trapper named Rex Liked the risks of wild porcupine sex. By incredible luck His dick never got stuck, But his nuts were just pitiful wrecks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat, when you sleep over someone''s house, you sleep OVER someone''s house!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you tried to rip the lips off a chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look on his face. "Say, mom, why is my bigger brother named "Mighty Storm"? "Because he was conceived during a mighty storm." "Why is my sister named "Cornflower"? "Well, your father and I were in a cornfield, when we made her." "And why is my other sister called "Moonchild"? "We were watching the moon landing while she was conceived." "Tell me, Torn Rubber, why are you so curious?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde decided to commit suicide by hanging herself from a tree in the park. A few days later, a man was walking his dog and spotted her hanging from the tree. He asks the blonde what she is doing and she replies, "I''m hanging myself." "You''re supposed to put the noose around your neck, not your waist," said the onlooker. "I tried that," replied the blonde, "but I couldn''t breathe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('zebra: 25 sizes bigger than an ''A'' bra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Russian Roulette, by Hugo First', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Lazy Boy, by Yu Doit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On clothes: do not iron while wearing. On a baby carriage: do not fold while in use.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an Iraqi force moving thru the desert. As they were approaching some mountains they heard (from over the mountains) "One U.S. Marine can take out 10 Iraqi fighters!" The General of the army sent out ten of his men to take care of the american, none of them came back after some shooting. Then he heard, "One U.S. Marine can take out 100 Iraqi fighters!" So the General sent out 100 of his men after a long time of shooting none of his men returned. Then he heard "One U.S. Marine can take out 1000 Iraqi fighters!" The General, angry now, sends 1000 fighters. After a very long time of shooting one man comes back. In his dying breath he said, "Don''t send anymore men! Its a trap, there are two of them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He''s great on the court, a sportswriter spoke of a college basketball player in a interview with his coach. "But how''s his academics?" "Why, he makes straight A''s," replied the coach. "Wonderful!" said the sportswriter. "Yes," agreed the coach, "but his B''s are a just little crooked."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many NCAA basketball players does it take to change a light bulb? Only one - but he gets money, a car, and three credit hours for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do soccer players drink? Penaltea!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren''t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes I am, I married the wrong man."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother-in-law was bitten by a mad dog in the street. "Oh, that''s terrible" "Yes, it was terrible to watch the dog die slowly in convulsions."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get holy water? You boil the hell out of it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Locomotive: A crazy reason for a crime!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father watched his young son practice baseball in the backyard by throwing the ball up and swinging at it. Time and time again the bat missed contact. The boy noticed his father watching, and said, "Wow, Dad! Aren''t I a great pitcher?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bumper sticker: BE KIND TO ANIMALS. HUG A HOCKEY PLAYER.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a way to make a horse stand perfectly still. Place a bet on him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess for a coffee where upon the parrot squawks "And get me a whisky, you cow!" The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the parrot and forgets the coffee. When this omission is pointed out to her the parrot drains its glass and bawls, "And get me another whisky, you idiot". Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another whisky but still no coffee. Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the parrot''s approach "I''ve asked you twice for a coffee, go and get it now or I''ll kick you". The next moment, both he and the parrot have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards. Plunging downwards the parrot turns to him and says "For someone who can''t fly, you complain too much!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks, Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself. Tom wasn''t happy about that: "When are you going to learn to be polite?" Bill: "If you had the chance to pick first, which one would you pick?" Tom: "The smaller piece, of course." Bill: "What are you whining about then? The smaller piece is what you want, right?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many consultants does it take to change a lightbulb? A: I''ll have an estimate for you a week from Monday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Excerpts from actual letters sent to landlords Could you please send someone to fix our bath tap? My wife got her toe stuck in it and it is very uncomfortable for us. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 5:30 his cock wakes me up, and it is getting too much. When the workmen were here, they put their tools in my wife''s new drawers and made a mess. Please send men with clean tools to finish the job and keep my wife happy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there was a woman who lost her cat named "LOVE." It was pretty dark outside and she lived in New York. So, thinking that he might be down the street, she put on her house-coat and went looking for him. When a police officer stopped to ask what she was doing, she said very honestly, "I''m looking for LOVE." The policeman arrested her on the spot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. I stopped caring about anniversaries when you stopped caring about cooking. 9. Today is our what? 8. Okay, let''s celebrate, but do we have to celebrate together? 7. I thought we only celebrated important events? 6. You can celebrate anniversaries with your next husband. 5. You don''t like what I pick out, so I thought, "Why bother?" 4. I got you a present worth a dollar for every time you were nice to me this year. Here''s a $5 gift certificate for McDonald''s. 3. If you want me to pretend like I care about our anniversary, I will. 2. You want to go out to dinner? Okay, okay, I''ll take you to Pizza Hut if it''ll shut ya up. 1. I thought you only had to celebrate anniversaries while you were still in love.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do u call, a hippopotamus that dances? A hiphopanominus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the square root of 69? Ate something (8....)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Santa have 3 gardens? So he can ho ho ho.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think you were crazy, but now I can see your nuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Four, one to change it and the other three to deny it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many believable, competent, "just right for the job" presidential candidates does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: It''s going to be a dark 4 years, isn''t it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many art directors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Does it have to be a lightbulb?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do firemen use red suspenders? To hold their pants up!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you staple in the middle of the paper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid that she gets lost in a telephone booth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: You know what''s gross? A: When you look in a mirror!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the chicken cross the road? Because he was attempting to cross it when yo mamma got hungry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What do you call a 500 pound Russian that can bend you like a bendy straw? A:Sir', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and played all over? Black and White (the computer game)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many nerds does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to be the cunsultant. One to be the labor manager. Two to hire people. Four to actually screw in the lightbulb. Five to be the ladder and ten to be the company board of directors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn''t control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words, "Give me all your money or I''ll shoot," the man shouted, "That''s not what I said!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The cop got out of his and walked up to the kid who was stopped for speeding. He rolled down his window. "I''ve been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The guy replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Eight hour lunch, two dollar tip. 2. Ask, "Excuse me, are you a really bad singer, or a really bad actor?" 3. After he describes each special, you shout, "Garbage!" 4. Whenever he walks by, cough and mutter, "Minimum wage". 5. Every few seconds, yell, "More waffles, Cuomo!" 6. Insist that before ordering, you be allowed to touch the London broil. 7. Tie tablecloth around neck and say, "You wouldn''t charge Superman for dinner, would you?" 8. Every time you eat or drink, cough really hard. 9. As he walks by to the kitchen, scream, "He''s gonna spit in the chowder!" 10. Three words: eat the check.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t be afraid of the dog, said the lady to young Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. "You know the old proverb, ''A barking dog never bites?''" "Yes," replied young Johnny. "You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three little boys went into a candy store. "I want two cents worth of jelly beans," the first boy said to the clerk. The clerk frowned. The jelly beans were on the top self, and he didn''t like climbing up there just to sell two cents worth, but he did it. When he came down, he put away his ladder and turned to the second boy. "What will you have?" he asked. "I''ll have two cents worth of jelly beans, too," said the boy. Angrily, the clerk got the ladder and climbed up to get the jelly beans. While he was still up there, he turned to the third boy. "You don''t want two cents worth of jelly beans, do you?" asked the man. "No, sir," answered the third boy, so the man climbed down and put away the ladder. "Now, what do you want?" the clerk asked the boy. "A nickel''s worth of the jelly beans," replied the lad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Acquaintance: A person you know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. Bachelor: A guy who gets to keep all his take-home pay. Pedestrian: A father who has teenagers who can drive. Honesty: The fear of being caught. Zebra: A horse prisoner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fine-looking gentleman sat down in the main dining room of an expensive restaurant. He ordered a big dinner and spent an hour enjoying himself. After he was given the check, he summoned the head waiter. "Ah, my friend," he said, "that was a delicious meal! Perhaps you don''t remember that I was a guest at this same table just about a year ago. And at that time I couldn''t pay the check, so you, sir had me thrown out in full view of all the other diners and thrown into the gutter just as if I were a bum!" "I am so sorry, sir" said the head waiter. "But, you understand-" "Oh it''s quite all right!" interrupted the gentleman, but I''m afraid I''ll have to trouble you again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a herd of white people? Avalanche What do you call a herd of black people? Mudslide What do you call a herd of mexicans? Jailbreak!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NOTE: This is a true story of a real call to a computor company tech support. One day a guy calls tech support. this is how it went... Cust: Hello? TS: Hello Cust: Yeah, my cup holder broke and my computor is still under warranty, so I would like to get it replaced. TS: Ummm cup holder? Cust: yeah cup holder... TS: Ummm did you get it with a promotional offer? Cust: No TS: Umm are you sure you got the right company? Cust: Yeah TS: Ummm... im sorry if i sound confused, because i am. Cust: Well its square, and its on the front of the computor, and it comes out when you press a button... At this point the Tech support guy had to put the guy on hold, so he could finish laughing... The guy had broken his CD-rom drive, thinking it was a cup holder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy1: Thats a bunch of cows. Farmer: No, a herd. Guy1: Of course I''ve heard of cows. Farmer:.No, I mean the cow herd Guy1: I have no secrets from cows', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In school one day, the teacher decided that in science class she would teach about the elements. So she stood in the front of the class and said, "Children, if you could have one raw element in the world what would it be?" Little Stevie raised his hand and said, "I would want gold, because gold is worth a lot of money and I could buy a Porsche." The teacher nodded and called on little Susie. Little Susie said, "I would want platinum, because platinum is worth more than gold and I could buy a Corvette" The teacher smiled and then called on Little Johnny. Little Johnny stood up and said, "I would want silicon." The teacher said, "Why Johnny?" He responded by saying, "Because my mom has two bags of it and you should see all the sports cars outside our house!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends are like condoms, they protect you when things get hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my four-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, he looked at the old pages as he turned them. Then something fell out of the Bible and he picked up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that has been pressed in between pages. "Momma, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. With astonishment in the young boy''s voice he answered: "It''s Adam''s suit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you know when you''re REALLY ugly? A. Your dog humps your leg with his eyes closed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: Haven''t I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that''s why I don''t go there anymore. Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I''ll go to mine. Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I''m a female inpersonator. Man: Hey baby, what''s your sign? Woman: Do not enter. Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized. Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today. Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Woman: But would you stay there? Man: If I could see you naked, I''d die happy. Woman: If I saw you naked, I''d probably die laughing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was chatting with her next-door neighbor. "I feel really good today. I started out this morning with an act of unselfish generosity. I gave a five dollar bill to a bum." "You gave a bum five whole dollars? That''s a lot of money to just give away. What did your husband say about it?" "Oh, he thought it was the proper thing to do. He said, ''Thanks.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man, fond of practical jokes, decided late one night to send his friend a collect telegram which read, "I am perfectly well." A week later, the joker received a heavy parcel - collect - on which he had to pay considerable charges. Upon opening it, he found a big block of concrete which had this message, "This is the weight your telegram lifted from my mind."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While enjoying an early morning breakfast in a northern Arizona cafe, four elderly ranchers were discussing everything from cattle, horses, and weather to how things used to be in the "good old days." Eventually the conversation moved on to their spouses. One gentleman turned to the fellow on his right and asked, "Roy, aren''t you and your bride celebrating your 50th wedding anniversary soon?" "Yup, we sure are," Roy replied. "Well, are you gonna do anything special to celebrate?" another man asked. The old gentleman pondered this for a moment, then replied, "For our 25th anniversary, I took the misses to Tucson. For our 50th, I''m thinking about going down there again to pick her up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Happy Anniversery! 2.You''re wearing THAT to the party!!?? 3.Do I look fat in this? 4.You didn''t know it was my birthday today!? 5.Oh my god! Can''t we just be friends! 6.Listen honey we have to talk... I think, I''m pregnant. 7.Here''s 100 dollars! 8.Hey! Is it okay if some of my friends come over to watch football and we go crazy when our team loses. 9.Sweetie can we not do it tonight? 10.Honey I''m home! How have you been today?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Happy aniversery! 2. Do I look fat in this? 3. Heres 100 dollars! Buy whatever you want. 4. I think im pregnant. 5. Do you wanna come shopping with me and my friends? We''re going to Victoria''s Secret. 6. I''m cheating on you with 1 other man and 2 women. 7. Hunney... can we not do it tonight. I''m just not in the mood. 8. Do you just wanna go on a vacation just me and you? We can go to the Bahamas! 9. I''m sorry. 10. Whenever you wanna get divorced just tell me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hunny, you forgot to put down the toilet seat again. Oh my God! you don''t know how to fix a car. Wife says: How do I look? Man: Terrible, go change!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone. Man who run in front of car get tired. Man who run behind car get exhausted. Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day. Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ. Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok. Man with one chopstick go hungry. Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails. Panties not best thing on earth but next to best thing on earth. War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left. Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house. Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night. It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it. Man who drive like hell, bound to get there. Man who fart in church sit in own pew. Crowded elevator smell different to midget.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THE CLINTON Virus...(Gives you a 7-Inch Hard Drive with NO memory.) THE BOB DOLE (AKA: VIAGRA) virus...(Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy) THE LEWINSKY virus...(Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then emails your best friends about what it did). THE RONALD REAGAN virus...(Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored) THE MIKE TYSON virus...(Quits after two bytes) THE OPRAH WINFREY virus... (Your 300 mb hard drive shrinks to 100 mb, then slowly expands to restabilize around 200.) THE JACK KEVORKIAN virus...(Deletes all old files) THE PROZAC virus...(Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn''t care) THE JOEY BUTTAFUOCO virus...(Only attacks minor files) THE ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER virus...(Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back) and last but not least............... THE LORENA BOBBITT virus... (Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy, then discards it through Windows)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the fall in Garden of Eden, Adam was walking with his sons Cain and Abel. They passed by the ruins of the Garden of Eden. One of the boys asked, "What''s that?" Adam replied, "Boys, that''s where your mother ate us out of house and home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A preacher phoned the city''s newspaper. "Thank you very much," said he, "for the error you made when you announced my sermon topic for last Sunday. The topic I sent you was ''What Jesus Saw in A Publican.'' You printed it as ''What Jesus Saw in a Republican'' I had the biggest crowd of the year!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The crumbling, old church building needed remodeling, so the preacher made an impassioned appeal, looking directly at the richest man in town. At the end of the message, the rich man stood up and announced, "Pastor, I will contribute $1,000." Just then, plaster fell from the ceiling and struck the rich man on the shoulder. He promptly stood again and shouted, "Pastor, I will increase my donation to $5,000." Before he could sit back down, plaster fell on him again, and again he virtually screamed, "Pastor, I will double my last pledge." He sat down, and an larger chunk of plaster fell hitting him on the head. He stood once more and hollered, "Pastor, I will give $20,000!" This prompted a deacon to shout, "Hit him again, Lord! Hit him again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new pastor moved into town and went out one Saturday to visit his parishioners. All went well until he came to one house. It was obvious that someone was home, but no one came to the door even after he had knocked several times. Finally, he took out his card and wrote on the back: Revelation 3:20 and stuck it in the door. The next day, as he was counting the offering he found his card in the collection plate. Below his message was the notation Genesis 3:10. Revelation 3:20 reads: "Behold I stand at the door and knock. If any man hear my voice, and opens the door, I will come in to him, and will dine with him, and he with me." Genesis 3:10 reads: "And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, "Mama, I don''t want to go out there. It''s dark." The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. "You don''t have to be afraid of the dark," she explained. "Jesus is out there. He''ll look after you and protect you." The little boy looked at his mother real hard and asked, "Are you sure he''s out there?" "Yes, I''m sure. He is everywhere, and he is always ready to help you when you need him," she said. The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little. Peering out into the darkness, he called "Jesus? If you''re out there, would you please hand me the broom?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This husband and wife couldn''t have any children, so they went to the pastor and asked for prayer. The pastor prayed for them and annointed them with oil. Sure enough, about 9 months later they had triplet babies. The couple once again showed up at the pastor''s study and as soon as the woman saw the pastor she ran up to him, threw her arms around him and gave him the biggest hug. "What was that all about"? he asked. She replied, "I''m just glad you used three in one oil and not WD40."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson; "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say ''Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.''" Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At Sunday School, they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny, a child in the kindergarten class, seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam''s ribs. Later in the week, his mother noticed him lying as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny, what is the matter?" Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my side. I think I''m going to have a wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Do not say what you mean. Ever. 2. Cry. Cry often. 3. Bring things up that were said, done, or thought years, months, or decades ago...or with other boyfriends. 4. Make them apologize for everything. 5. Get mad at them for everything. 6. Demand to be called or e-mailed. Often. Whine when they don''t comply. 7. Use daddy as a weapon. Tell them about his gun collection, his quick trigger finger, and his affection for his Little Princess. 8. Be late for everything. Yell if they''re late. 9. Criticize the way they dress. 10. Talk about your ex-boyfriend 24/7. Then compare and contrast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandchildren are God''s reward for not killing your children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a rabbit were racing cabbage, who would win? The cabbage, because it''s a head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man traveling down a country road was forced to stop before a giant puddle covering the entire road. Looking to the side of the road, the man noticed a farmer leaning on a fence. "Think it''s safe to cross?" the man asked. "I reckon so," replied the farmer. The car was immediately swallowed by the puddle as the man drove in. In fact, it was so deep that he had to roll his window down to swim out of his car back to the surface. As his head broke the surface, the man said to the farmer, "I thought you said I could safely drive through this puddle!" "Well, shoot!" said the farmer, scratching his head. "It only come up chest-high on my ducks!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the surgeon came to see his blonde patient on the day after her operation, she asked him somewhat hesitantly just how long it would be before she could resume her sex life. "Uh, I hadn''t really thought about it," admitted the stunned surgeon. You''re the first one ever to ask that after a tonsillectomy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny goes up to his mother and asks, "Is God male or female?" After thinking for a moment, his mother responds, "Well, honey, God is both male and female." This confuses Little Johnny, so he asks, "Is God black or white?" "Well, God is both black and white." This further confuses him so he asks, "Is God gay or straight?" At this the mother is getting concerned, but answers nonetheless, "Honey, God is both gay and straight." At this Little Johnny''s face lights up with understanding and he triumphantly asks, "Mom, is God Michael Jackson?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a husband was chiding his beautiful blonde wife about leaving her keys in the ignition of her car. "If I take them out of the car I lose them," she reasoned. "Yes dear, but what if someone steals your car?" the husband countered. "Oh that''s okay," the wife chirped happily, "I keep a spare key in the glove box!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men were running for the same seat in their state senate. The two men had just finished meeting for lunch in a restaurant. Said the first man "I''m going to win the election because I put in a personal touch. For example, I left the waiter a ten dollar tip so that he would vote for me." "That''s nothing," replies the second man to the first, "I left the waiter a 5 cent tip, and told him that I was your campaign manager."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where should a dressmaker live? On the outskirts of the city.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the broom tired? It over swept.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American and Japanese were sitting next to each other on a plane. The American turned and asked the Japanese, "What kind of -ese are you?" The Japanese man answered "I''m sorry, I don''t know what you mean." "What kind of -ese are you?" the American repeated. The Japanese was showing obvious confusion. Irritated, the American explained, "Are you Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese, what?" "Oh, I''m Japanese." Soon after, the Japanese turned to the American and asked him what kind of -key he was. The American, now annoyed, replied, "What d''you mean, ''key''?" The Japanese asked again, "Are you a monkey, a donkey, or a Yankee?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Japanese eat little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. The French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what gets you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him ....what? A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a couple doing yard work, and the wife stops to go up and take a shower. The husband is looking for the rake and yells to his wife, who looks out of the upstairs bathroom window, "Where''s the rake?" She can''t hear him, so he points to his eye (I), points to his knee (need) and then makes raking motions. "What?" she yells, confused. So he goes through the whole routine again. She nods as if she understands and then points to her eye, squeezes her left breast, slaps her bum and then rubs her crotch. Her husband is somewhat confused, but totally aroused, so he quickly goes in the house, up the stairs, and into the bathroom. "What did you say?" She answered, "I said, ''Eye, left tit, behind, the bush.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student comes to a young professor''s office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, and kneels pleadingly. "I would do *anything* to pass this exam." She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, and gazes meaningfully into his eyes. "I mean..." she repeats, "...I would do...*anything*." He returns her gaze. "Anything?" "*Anything*." His voice softens. "*Anything*??" "*Anything*." His voice turns to a whisper. "Would you...*study*?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An angry wife met her husband at the door. She could smell alcohol on his breath and there was lipstick on his collar. "I assume," she snarled, "that there''s a reason you''re waltzing in here at six o''clock in the morning?" "There is," he replied. "Breakfast."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a hurry to get a special dinner party, the guest speaker arrived and sat down, only to realize he''d forgotten his false teeth. He explained his dilemma to the man sitting next to him. The man said, "No problem," reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of false teeth. "Try these,"he said. "Too loose," the speaker said. The man pulled out another pair. "Too tight," the speaker told him. "I have one more pair." The speaker tried them and they fit perfectly. With that, he ate his meal and gave his speech. When the dinner was over, he went to thank the man who''d helped him. "Where''s your office?" he inquired. "I''m looking for a good dentist." The man replied: "I''m not a dentist. I''m an undertaker."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you invented the solar powered flashlight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist. The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming. The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I''m a rabbit! I''m a rabbit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher was teaching a class about the big bang theory. She asked Billy to go outside and observe his surroundings. She then asked... "Billy did you see the sky?" "Yes", said Billy. "Did you see the sun?" "Yes", said the boy. "Did you see God?" "No", said the boy. The Teacher said, "So God really isn''t there." A little girl started to ask Billy some questions. "Did you see the sky?" "Yes" was the reply "Did you see the sun?" Again, "yes" was the answer. "Do you see the teacher''s brain? Because according to her, she doesn''t have one!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was driving her kids to school one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children began discussing the dog''s duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster. "No," said another, "he''s just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a close. "They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was at the beach with his children when his four-year-old daughter ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore, where a seagull lay dead in the sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the daughter asked. "He died and went to Heaven," the dad replied. The little girl thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him back down?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy had just got home from Sunday School and mom was cooking lunch. "Mommy, is it true that before you''re born you''re just dust and after you die you go back to being dust?" "That''s right son, why?" "Well that''s just what they said at church today." "Run up stairs and wash your hands son, lunch will be ready in a few minutes." About 10 minutes went by and she called out for him to come down. "I''ll be there in a minute." As they were about to sit down at the table, the little boy asked again about being dust before being born and after you die. Once again mother said yes son. The little boy looked at her and said, "then you better get up to my room pretty quick, because something under my bed is either coming or going!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of religious service when she was startled by an intruder. As she caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables, she yelled, "Stop....Acts 2:38!" (Turn from your sin). The burglar stopped dead in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done. As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar, "Why did you just stand there? All she did was yell a scripture to you." "Scripture?" replied the burglar. "She said she had an AXE and two 38''s!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 4-year-old boy was asked to return thanks before Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food. He gave thanks for the turkey, the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies, the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and everyone waited--and waited. After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank God for the broccoli, won''t he know that I''m lying?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he knew the answer so quickly. "How do you know that?" "Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Preacher said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lord, grant me the strength that I may not fall Into the clutches of cholesterol; At polyunsaturates, I''ll never mutter, For the road to Hell is paved with butter And cake is cursed and cream is awful And Satan is hiding in every waffle. Beelzebub is a chocolate drop, And Lucifer is a lollipop, Teach me the evils of hollandaise Of pasta and globs of mayonnaise; And crisp fried chicken from the south Lord, if you love me, shut my mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked his wife what she''d like for her 40th birthday. "I''d love to be six again," she replied. On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early, and off they went to a local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear, everything there was! Wow! Five hours later, she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Right to a McDonald''s they went, where her husband ordered her a Happy Meal along with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake. Then, it was off to a movie - the latest Disney; and what a fabulous adventure! Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed. He leaned over and lovingly asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being six again?" With one eye opened she said "You idiot, I meant my dress size."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl and her father decided to go to church, because her father wanted to introduce her to the Christian World. As they sat down, a collection plate begins to be passed around. As the plate came to the girl''s father, he searches his pockets for money. Then his daughter whispers in his ear, "Don''t worry Daddy, I''m already free and covered.... I''m under 5."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a man and his wife decide to go out on a date. They get all dolled up, call the cab, and put the cat out. When the cab arives, they head out the door just as the cat darts back inside. The man head backs in to chase out the cat, and his wife heads to the cab. Not wanting to let on that no one would be home that night, she explains to the driver, "He''s just going back in to say good-night to my mother." In a few minutes, the man returns to explain, "Sorry it took me so long. The old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Friday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her class. She told them that she would read a quote and the first student to correctly identify who said it would receive the rest of the day off. She started with "This was England''s finest hour." Little Suzy instantly jumped up and said, " Winston Churchill." "Congratulations," said the teacher "you may go home." The teacher then said, "Ask not what your country can do for you." Before she could finish this quote, another young lady belts out, "John F. Kennedy". "Very good" says the teacher, "you may go." Irritated that he has missed two golden opportunities, Little Johnny said, "I wish those girls would just shut up." Upon overhearing this comment, the outraged teacher demanded to know who said it. Johnny instantly rose to his feet and said, "Bill Clinton. I''ll see you Monday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50." The second boy says, "That''s nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100." The third boy says, "I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon. And it takes eight people to collect all the money!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young West Virginian girl wanted to go to college at UVA. But her father said "No way! You''re going to By-God West Virginia Univ." Well, she got her way and she went to UVA. The first semester went by, and she wrote home that she was getting married, to a man from Richmond, VA named Clarence. Her father said "I''ll be damned if my daughter is marrying a man from Richmond, you''re marrying a By-God West Virginian boy," so he sent his two sons to UVA to get their sister. In a couple of days they returned. The confused father asked "Where is your sister?" They replied "We were almost there Dad, but we got to this overpass with a sign that said ''Clarence 13''6'''' so we turned around and drove the hell out of there!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''ve had too much coffee when... You can type sixty words a minute with your feet Instant coffee takes too long You chew on other people''s fingernails You answer the door, before people knock You sleep with your eyes open You go to sleep, just so you can wake up and smell the coffee You don''t even wait for the water to boil anymore You''re the employee of the month at Starbucks and you don''t even work there You help your dog chase its tail You lick your coffeepot clean You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee You''re so wired you pick up FM radio You have a picture of your coffee mug, on your coffee mug!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes on vacation to a tropical island. As soon as he gets off the plane, he hears drums. He thinks "Wow, this is cool." He goes to the beach, he hears the drums, he eats lunch, he hears drums, he goes to a luau, he hears drums. He TRIES to go to sleep, he hears drums. This goes on for several nights, and gets to the point where the guy can''t sleep at night because of the drums. Finally, he goes down to the front desk. When he gets there, he asks the manager, "Mister, that''s it!! Why won''t those drummers stop?! I can''t get any sleep!" The manager replies, "No! The drums must NEVER stop. It''s terrible if the drums stop drumming." "Why?" "When drums stop... bass solo begins."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? You. You who? Yoo hoo, I''m right over here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two small boys, one catholic and one protestant get lost in the woods. Darkness comes down and they near a monastery. Upon entering they are asked their faith, telling the head monk their religions. The Catholic lad gets the best of treatment, good food, a good bed near the fireplace. The protestant lad however gets a bowl of cold gruel, and is told to sleep by the drafty door to keep the cold out of the room. In the morning the head monk asks the boys how it was. "I dreamt I was in heaven, Father" said the Catholic boy. "It was just wonderful." "I dreamt that I was in hell " said the protestant boy. "And what was that like?" said the holy father. "Just like this place, couldn''t get near the fire for catholics!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she hauls ass, she has friends come help!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she walks in front of the T.V., you miss 5 minutes of your show!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don''t get wet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she goes swimming she gives the pool stretch marks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back party!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she puts on her lipstick with a paint-roller!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she puts mayonnaise on aspirin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she pulls up a chair to an all-u-can-eat buffet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she made weight watchers go blind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she looks like she''s smuggling a Volkswagen!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An attorney was sitting in his office late one night, when the Devil appeared before him. The Devil told the lawyer, "I have a proposition for you. You can win every case you try, for the rest of your life. Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money. All I want in exchange is your soul, your wife''s soul, your children''s souls, the souls of your parents, grandparents, and parents-in-law, and the souls of all of your friends and law partners." The lawyer thought about this for a moment, then asked, "So, what''s the catch?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two lawyers were in a coffee shop talking. One of the lawyers names was Thomas Ulaiy (A-lie). After a while their conversation became rather morbid, and they started to talk about what they were going to have on their tomb stones. Thomas said the he wasn''t going to have his name put on his tomb stone, instead he was going have "Here lies the body of an honest lawyer!", he said enthusiastically. "Why are you going to have that?" asked his friend. "Well", said Thomas, "When people are walking through the cemetery, and they see... ''Here Lies The Body of an Honest Lawyer'', they''ll say "Yeah, that''s Ulaiy".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A middle-aged couple had two beautiful teenage daughters and decided to try one last time for a son. After months, the wife finally got pregnant and after nine months, bore a healthy baby boy. The elated father rushed to the nursery to check on his infant. He was horrified to see the ugliest child he had ever saw. He went to his wife and said that there was no way he could be the father of that child. "Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered." Then he gave her a stern look and asked, "Have you been fooling around on me?" The wife smiled sweetly, "Not this time..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mortician was examining Mr. Zeron''s body before sending it to be cremated. He discovered the longest private part he had ever seen on Zeron. He felt it a pity to cremate him with it, so, apologising to the corpse, the mortician used his tools to remove the tremendously huge private part. The mortician stuffed the prize possesion into his briefcase and took it home to show his wife. "I have something to show you that you won''t believe," he said and opened his briefcase. Upon seeing it, his wife cried, "Oh my God! Zeron is dead!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks up to a bartender one night and asked for a beer. "Certainly, sir. That''d be one cent." The guy was surprised at the incredible price. The guy, unable to believe such prices, looked up the menu and ordered a nice juicy T-bone steak with chips, peas and a fried egg. "Certainly, sir. That''d be five cents including the beer." The guy couldn''t trust the bartender no more and called for the manager. "The manager''s upstairs with my wife." The guy curiously asked why he was with his wife. "He do my business, I''ll do his."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young 6-month pregnant lady boarded a bus and took a seat. She noticed a young man smiling at her and got humiliated on account of her condition. She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She moved again and then on her fourth move he burst out laughing. She had him arrested. The case came before the court, and when asked why he acted in such a manner, the man replied, "When the lady boarded the bus I couldn''t help noticing she was pregnant. She sat under an advertisement which read, ''Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins.'' Then she moved under one that read, ''Sloans Liniments Remove Swelling.'' I was even more amused when she sat under a shaving advertisement which read, ''William''s Stick Did The Trick.'' I could not control myself any longer when on the fourth move she sat under an advertisement which read, ''Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident.''" He won the case.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a train compartment, there are 3 men and a ravishing lady. Conversation broke out and turned erotic. The lady proposed, "If each of you would give me $1, I would show you my legs." The men, charmed by her beauty, handed over the money. The lady pulled her dress up a little to show her legs. She followed, "If each of you would give me $10, I would show you my thighs." Driven by lust, the men forked out the money and the lady pulled up her dress more to show her thighs. The men, getting excited, pulled off their coats. The lady then said, "If each of you would give me $100, I would show you where I had my appendicitis operated on." The men, being men, naturally surrendered their money for more. The lady turned to the window and pointed at a hospital, "There!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman had an appointment in the morning with her gynecologist and was running late. She hadn''t had the time to give herself a proper washup so she took a washcloth and gave herself a wash in ''that area'' in front of the sink. She threw the cloth into the wash basket after making sure she was presentable and drove to her appointment. She was silent throughout the checkup and ignored the gynecologist when he said, "My... We have taken a little extra effort this morning, haven''t we?" It was only until after the day was over when her daughter called to ask if she had seen where her washcloth was. The woman told her to get a fresh piece from the cabinet but the daughter said, "No, I need that one that was here by the sink. It had all my glitter and sparkles in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the usual tip? a man growled when, Brett, a college boy delivered his pizza. "Well," Brett continued, "this is my first delivery, but the other guys said that if I got a quarter out of you, I''d be doing great." "Is that so?" grunted the man. "In that case, here''s five dollars." "Thanks," Brett said, "I''ll put it in my college fund." "By the way, what are you studying?" inquired the man. And Brett replied, "Applied psychology."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy and girl are playing in a sandbox. The little boy has to go to take a pee and he was told by his mother to always be polite and not to talk about private matters in public. At first he holds it in because he does not know what to say to the little girl to excuse himself. Then he remembers what his Mom had said at the restaurant to excuse herself from the table, so he turns to the little girl and says, "Will you excuse me, I have to go powder my nose." And, saying that, he leaps out of the sandbox and runs to the washroom. When he returns, the little girl looks up at him and asks, "Did you powder your nose?" "Yes," said the little boy, stepping back into the sandbox. "Well, then," says the little girl, "you''d better close your purse because your lipstick is hanging out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady walks into a shop that sells VERY expensive Persian rugs. She browses around, then spots the perfect rug and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the texture of the rug, she farts loudly. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and hopes a sales person does not pop up right now. As she turns back, there, standing next to her is a salesman. "Good day, madam. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely rug?" He answers, "Madam, if you farted just touching it, you are very likely to shit when you hear the price!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What would you do w/out your memories ? A: Forget', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the difference between a fish and a piano ? A: You can''t tuna fish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the seismologist say when he messed up? A: It''s not my fault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What animal talks the most? A. The yak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant and some peanut butter? A: Either an elephant that sticks to the roof of your mouth, or peanut butter that never forgets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did judge say when the skunk came in the court ? A: Odor in the court.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep an idiot in suspense? Keep scrolling down! Not far now! Keep going! Solve this problem while you wait for the answer to pop up. 6! Not enough? Solve this! (Pi)! The answer will pop up shortly... Whoops, there was a mistake. Go back to the 2nd line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations across the United States and rest of the world. Sign on a repair shop door: WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN''T WORK) Sign at Norfolk farm gate: BEWARE! I SHOOT EVERY TENTH TRESPASSER AND THE NINTH ONE HAS JUST LEFT Seen during a conference: FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN''T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE FIRST FLOOR', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men died and went to Heaven. St. Peter greeted them, and said "I''m sorry, gentlemen, but your mansions aren''t ready yet. Until they are, I can send you back to Earth as whatever you want to be." "Great!" said the first guy, "I want to be an eagle soaring above beautiful scenery!" "No problem," replied St. Peter, and POOF! The guy was gone. "And what do you want to be," St. Peter asked the other guy. "I''d like to be one cool stud!" was the reply. "Easy," replied St. Peter, and the other guy was gone. After a few months, their mansions were finished, and St. Peter sent an angel to fetch them back. "You''ll find them easily," he says, "One of them is soaring above the Grand Canyon, and the other one is on a snow tire somewhere in Detroit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar. A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo -- of handcuffs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl spoke to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it is a very large mammal, its throat is very small. The little girl said, "But how can that be? Jonah was swallowed by a whale." Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human. "It is physically impossible!" she said. Undaunted, the little girl said, "Well, when I get to heaven I will ask Jonah." To this, the teacher said, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then YOU ask him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store''s opening time, in front of the store. A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colourful curse. On the man''s second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, and knocked around a bit, and then thrown at the end of the line again. As he got up, he said to the person at the end of the line, "That does it! If they hit me one more time, I won''t open the store!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day. "My name is Billy. What''s yours?" asked the first boy. "Tommy," replied the second. "My Daddy''s an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Billy. Tommy replied, "My Daddy''s a lawyer." "Honest?" asked Billy. "No, just the regular kind", replied Tommy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two white horses fell in the mud and three came out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you drowned when you were bathed in sunlight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This young girl about 7 year old had a dog which she took for a walk everyday after school. Well, one day her dog was in heat, so her father told her that she couldn''t walk the dog for a week or so because it wasn''t feeling well. His daughter became very upset and cried for most of the night. The next day the father came up with a plan. He put some gasoline on the dogs rear end to hide the smell from the male dogs. Well when the girl got home she was happy to find that she could now walk her dog again. About an hour later, the girl returned without the dog. The father asked, "What on earth has happened to the dog?" The girl replies, "Well she ran out of gas a few blocks back, and is being pushed home by another dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny tried out for the school play. The teacher gave him these lines to practice: "Hark! A pistol shot! There lies a lady with hope in her soul. I think I''ll snatch a kiss and run into the forest. By William Shakespeare." Little Johnny practiced and practiced and did the lines perfectly every time. The night of the play it was his turn to speak. This is what he said: "Hark! A pigeon shit! There lies a lady with soap in her hole. I think I''ll kiss her snatch and run into the forest. By William Snakeshit... Horseshit... Oh, shit! I didn''t want to be in this damn play anyway!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? "You may have graduated, but I have several degrees."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I see London, I see France, I see your underpants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy and his older sister were building paper airplanes when his sister said, "We should stop building planes now and play with the ones we''ve got. We don''t need to waste any more paper." "Why?" "Because if we use too much paper we''ll lose all the trees, and everyone will die.." "Because we don''t have any paper?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning. The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don''t have to wait as long to get our coffee." The husband said, "You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee." The wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the bible that man should do the coffee." The husband replies, "I can''t believe that, show me." So she fetched the bible, and opened the New Testament and shows him the top of several pages, that it indeed says........"HEBREWS"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of soup weighs 1000 pounds? Won ton soup!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 expecting mothers were talking in their doctors office, about the sex of their babies. The first mother said, "I''m having a boy." "How can you be so sure?" asked the other two. "Well" said the first, "my husband was on top." The second replied, "If that''s the case then I''m having a girl because I was on top." The third started to cry. The first two asked her what was wrong. "I''m going to have a puppy" she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer, a carpenter and an astronaut were having drinks in a bar when suddenly one gets up and hits the other. "who hit me?" "It wasn''t me." "I didn''t see too much either." "It must have been the dog" "What dog?" "I''m blind so I couldn''t see a dog." "Doh, that means I hit myself." "hahahahaha how strange I thought you guys had hit me. Sorry about that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man drove up to a beautiful lady at a stop light. She was in a nice Porsche. He asks her, "Excuse me, miss, you have Grey Poupon?" "I sure hope not, I just got my car waxed; damn those birds."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My computer is like Britney Spears; cheap, white, and plastic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A carpet layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady. He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he''d lost his cigarettes. In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump. ''''No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes,'''' he said to himself. He proceeded to get out his hammer and flattened the hump. As he was cleaning up, the lady came in. ''''Here,'''' she said, handling him his pack of cigarettes. ''''I found them in the hallway.'''' ''''Now,'''' she said, ''''if only I could find my parakeet. ''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Laughter is like changing a baby''s diaper... It doesn''t permanently solve any problems, but it makes things more acceptable for a while!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It ain''t easy to be a dick; I''ve got a head I can''t think with, An eye I can''t see out of. I have to hang around with two nuts all the time. My closest neighbour is a real asshole. My best friend is a pussy. And every time I get excited, I throw up; And worst of all, my owner beats me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a sweltering hot day when three guys, Arnold, Bobby and Calvin, were walking along a never-ending path in a park. Arnold: It sure is hot! I''d like a vanilla cone very much. Bobby: Yeah, my shirt''s soak with sweat. I''d give 10 bucks for a strawberry cone. Calvin: Well I''d give 20 bucks for any cone. Arnold picks something off the ground saying, "Pay up Cal, here''s a pine cone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('See if you can find the hidden image in the group of characters below. It takes some concentration, but it''s worth it. Don''t cheat by scrolling down before you look at it. Have fun! You''ll be surprised when you see what it is... {{{{{{{===**++++*****+++++++++++????????/// //////////%\\\ @@@@@444+=+=****&^"""""}}}|||||||]]] xxxxxxxx<<<<<>>>>>>>xxxxxxxx ~~~~~~*********~~~~~~~~ ====||\\/////////*****<><><><><><><>{}{}{} %%%%%%%%%%%% $$$&&$$&$$===~|~|~|~|====++ Most people find it easiest to put your nose right up to the screen, then slowly back away while continuing to stare. If you still don''t see it scroll down for the answer...... ANSWER: It''s a picture of..........NOTHING!!! I can''t believe you fell for that! I hope someone walked by and saw you looking like a complete fool with your eyes crossed and your nose against the screen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde run out of shampoo? She kept following the instructions: lather, rinse, repeat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('News Flash : Today the world was stunned by the news of the death of the Energizer Bunny. He was six years old. Authorities believe that the death occurred approximately 8:42 PM last evening. Best known as the irritating pink bunny that kept going, and going and going, "Pinkie" as he was known to his friends and family was alone at the time of his death. An emergency autopsy was performed early this morning. The Chief Medical Examiner concluded that the cause of death was acute cardiac arrest induced by sexual over-stimulation. Apparently, someone had put the bunny''s batteries in backwards and he kept coming, and coming, and coming...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Late one night in the Washington D.C., a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money!" he demanded. Indignant, the affluent man replied, "You can''t do this - I''m a US Congressman!" "In that case," replied the robber, "give me MY money!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a man trying to cross the street. As he steps off the curb a car comes screaming around the corner and heads straight for him. The man walks faster, trying to hurry across the street, but the car changes lanes and is still coming at him. So the guy turns around to go back, but the car changes lanes again and continues in his direction. By now, the car is so close and the man so scared that he just freezes and stops in the middle of the road. The car gets really close, then swerves at the last possible moment and screeches to a halt right next him. The driver rolls down the window. The driver is a squirrel. The squirrel says to the man says, "See, it''s not as easy as it looks, is it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three guys that won a contest. They would get to spend a year in a room with anything they chose. The first guy loves to have sex. So they put him in a room for a year with over 200 girls to have sex with for a year. The second guy loved to get drunk. So they put him in a room with every beer there ever was to drink for a year. The third guy loved to smoke. So they put him in a room with every kind of cigarette there was to smoke. Two hours later they hear the guy that loved to smoke banging on the door but they say fuck him, he''s in there for a year. A year later they let them out. They first guy came out and he could barely walk, after how many times he had sex. The second guy came out and couldn''t walk because he was so drunk. The third guy came out crying. They asked him why he was banging on the door and why he was crying. He said, " I forgot my lighter!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent survey, 60 percent of respondents said the cities they live in are noisier now than they were five years ago. The other 40 percent didn''t hear the question.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Dad, $chool i$ really $well. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. I have $o much $tuff, I $imply can''t think of anything I need. $o if you like, $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you. Love Your $on Dear Son, I kNOw astroNOmy, ecoNOmy, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep an hoNOrs student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can''t study eNOugh. Love, Dad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Dishwasher. Dishwasher Who? Dishwasher whay I sphoke vhefore I hafe fawse feeth (This was the way I spoke before I had false teeth)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men are like... Placemats. They only show up when there''s food on the table. Men are like... Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion. Men are like... Government Bonds. They take so long to mature. Men are like... Lava Lamps. Fun to look at but not so bright. Men are like... Bank accounts, without a lot of money, they don''t generate much interest. Men are like... High heels, they''re easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever notice how many of women''s problems can be traced to the male gender? MENstruation MENopause MENtal breakdown GUYnecology (Gynecology) HIMmorrhoid (Hemorrhoid)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three boys with names Shutup, Manners and Trouble. They were walking around town when they realized Trouble was missing. Shutup and Manners searched and searched but failed to find the missing boy. At a lost, they went up to the Neighbourhood Police Post. Manners had to go to the toilet so Shutup went up and spoke to the policeman there. Policeman=P Shutup=S P: Hi little boy, what''s your name? S: Shutup P: What a rude boy! Where are your manners? S: At the toilet P: What are you talking about? Are you looking for trouble here? S: Yes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple were at the beach watching a volleyball game when they notice a pair of adults nearby kissing passionately, the woman running her hands down the man''s arms, massaging erotically while nibbling on his ear. The couple was intrigued yet they don''t want to miss the exciting match so the girl asked her boyfriend if she should watch the match or them. The guy replied, "Watch them. You already know how to play volleyball."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An agitated patron calls on to the blond waiter and inquired why there was a footprint on his meal. "Well," the innocent-looking blond waiter replied. "You rushed in here, ordered an omelette and asked me to step on it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five toads arrived at the Heaven''s Gates. The man in charge asked for each toad''s name and what they had been doing. The first gave his name and said he had been going in and out of puddles. The man let him through the gate. He interrogated the next three toads and all three too said they had been going in and out of puddles. Since there was nothing wrong, the man let them all in. Then he reached the last toad. She was a pretty one, in toad''s sense, and when asked what her name was, she replied, "Puddles."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond was using a pager for the first time. When the operator instructed her to key in "10" to leave a voice message, she followed and after the beep, said, "Excuse me, may I speak to Zeron please?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 7999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rich and Kim, a couple, were in a room when Kim asked Rich if he would ever forget her. He replied that he would never forget her. Then she said, "Knock-knock!" and, of course, Rich said, "Who''s there?" "See!" she exclaimed sulkily. "You have forgotten already."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman went to shop for a mirror when she chanced upon an expensive one. When she asked why, the salesman told her it was magical, that if you recited a rhyme in front of it, your wishes would come true. The woman bought it and hung it on the door at home. Mirror Mirror on the door Make my busts a forty-four The woman instantly had a huge chest. She told her husband but he was in doubt. He went to the mirror then and said: Mirror Mirror on the door Make my penis hit the floor His legs were missing, leaving stumps mid-thigh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man selling hats went to a jungle for a rest. A monkey came and stole a hat. The man couldn''t catch the monkey. He realized the monkey followed the man''s actions. He threw the hat to the ground. The monkey threw the hat to the ground. He picked up both hats and went away. The man then had a grandson who followed the family business and sold hats. The grandson went to a jungle to rest while selling hats. A monkey came and stole a hat. The grandson thought of his grandfather''s story, and threw the hat on the floor. The monkey ran and picked up the hat. It then slapped the grandson, saying, "You think you''re the only one having a grandfather?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so old, her memories are in black and white!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a strong preaching on the devil. One said to the other, "What do you think about all this Satan stuff?" The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It''s probably just your dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young , attractive woman thought she might have some fun with a stiff-looking military man at a cocktail party, so she walked over and asked him, "Major, when was the last time you had sex?" "1956," was his reply. "No wonder you look so uptight!" she exclaimed. "Major, you need to get out more!" "I''m not sure I understand you," he answered, glancing at his watch, ..."It''s only 2014 now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma''s like a mail box, open all day and all night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A king is sentencing his prisoners. The first person enters and says that he stole a horse. "Hang him," the king yells. The second person comes in and says he stole old ladies'' purses. "You heartless fiend! Shoot him" the king growls. The third person comes in and says that he pirated software on the internet and stole billions of dollars from internet companies. "Well what the heck are you guys doing just standing there?", he tells his men, "Hire him already!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a man held a contest. The winner would be who could get the most ping pong balls in one day. The first man comes back with 100. The second man comes back with 110. The third man comes back with a whole ton of bruises. The men ask him why he didn''t collect any ping pong balls and why he was bruised. He said, "Ping pong balls? I thought he said King Kong''s balls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a little boy who had just learned to count on his fingers. One day his uncle came to visit and the boy was anxious to show off his newly acquired skill. He told the uncle to ask him an addition question. So the uncle asked, "What is three plus four?" The little boy counts it out on his fingers and said, "Seven." The uncle said, "Listen kid, you can''t count it out on your hands because someday when you are in school, a teacher will get mad at you for it. Now put your hands in your pockets." So the little boy put his hands in his pockets and his uncle asked, "What is five plus five?" The uncle saw movement in the boys pockets, then the boy said, "Eleven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redneck couple had lived together in the backwoods for over fifty years. To celebrate their fiftieth anniversary, the man took her to a large city and they checked into a plush hotel. The woman said to the bellman, "We refuse to settle for such a small room. No windows, no bed, and no air conditioning." "But, madam," replied the bellman. "Don''t ''But madam'' me," she continued. "You can''t treat us like we''re a couple of fools just because we don''t travel much, and we''ve never been to the big city, and never spent the night at a hotel. I''m going to complain to the manager." "Madam," the bellman said, "this isn''t your room; this is the elevator!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant woman goes into a coma moments after she gives birth to twins, one boy and one girl. When she awakens, several days later, she cries out frantically to see her children. The doctors come to her, and the first thing she asks is "How are my children?" "Fine" says the doctor, your brother named them. She thinks to herself, Oh no, my brother''s an idiot. "What did he name them?" she asks the doctor. "He named the girl Denise" said the doctor. Well, maybe I misjudged my brother, Denise isn''t such a bad name, she realizes. "What did he name the boy?" Replies the doctor "Denephew."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After being with her all evening, the man couldn''t take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave if something like this happened. When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died." "Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn''t, mine would have had to!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a jewelry store, a young man bought an expensive locket as a present for his girlfriend. "Don''t you want her name engraved upon it?" asked the jeweler. The young man thought for a moment, and then, ever the pragmatic, steadfastly replied, "No, just engrave it: To My One And Only Love. That way, if we break up and she throws it back to me in anger, I can use it again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker had for Christmas? A. He felt his presence!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How did the blond injure herself raking leaves? A. She fell out of the tree!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What did Stevie Wonder say about the cheese grater he got for Christmas? A. It was the scariest book he had ever read!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American. an Englishman and a Chinese man were all taking part in a quiz contest. One question asked them was to fill in a blank in a song title and then spell the word. The song title was ''Old Macdonald had a ----''. The American was first to answer - he said ''ranch'', spelt R-A-N-C-H. "Wrong" said the quiz master. The Englishman answered next - he said ''estate'', spelt E-S-T-A-T-E. "Wrong" said the quiz master. Then the Chinese man answered - he said ''farm''. "Please spell it" said the quiz master. "E - I - E - I - O"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were any more pointless, you would be a circle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your IQ was any lower you would trip on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat when she sits down in class she sits by everyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat when I put her on the family tree the branch broke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat her belt size is the equator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman went to a wishing well and wished that she could become a better driver. So she turned into a man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many Lizzie''s does it take to screw up a light bulb A: I Dunno, but it only takes one to screw up a graduation ( from movie lizzie McGuire: she ruins junior high graduation)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blond who tried to hijack a submarine? She demanded $100,000 and a parachute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know something is wrong with today''s educational system when you figure out that of the three R''s, reading, writing, and arithmetic, only one actually starts with an R.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s chilly in here, the wealthy customer sniffed. "Will you please turn down the air conditioner?" "No problem sir," said the waiter. After a few minutes, the man flagged the server again. "Now I''m too warm." "All right," said the waiter. But soon the customer was chilly again. Finally a patron at a nearby table whispered to the waiter, "I commend you for your patience. That guy is certainly keeping you busy." "No he''s not," the waiter said with a shrug. "We don''t even have an air conditioner."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These two poor kids go to a birthday party at a rich kid''s house. The kid is so rich that he has his own swimming pool, and all the kids go in. As they''re changing afterwards, one of the poor kids says to the other one, "Did you notice how small the rich kid''s penises were?" "Yeah," says his mate, "It''s probably because they''ve got toys to play with."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill pilled up a stool at his favorite bar and announced, "My wife Suzie must love me more than any woman has ever loved any man!" "What makes you say that?" the bartender inquired. "Last week," Bill explained, "I had to take a couple of sick days from work. Suzie was so thrilled to have me around that every time the milkman and the post office guy came by, she''d run down the driveway, waving her arms and hollering, `My old man''s home! My old man''s home!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Michael Jackson and plastic bags have in common? They are both made out of plastic and are dangerous for children to play with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the airport for a business trip, I settled down to wait for the boarding announcement at Gate 35. Then I heard the voice on the public address system saying, "We apologize for the inconvenience, but Delta Flight 570 will board from Gate 41." So my family picked up our luggage and carried it over to Gate 41. Not ten minutes later the public address voice told us that Flight 570 would in fact be boarding from Gate 35. So, again, we gathered our carry-on luggage and returned to the original gate. Just as we were settling down, the public address voice spoke again: "Thank you for participating in Delta''s physical fitness program.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, "Wow, these seats are big!" The person next to him answered, "Everything is big in Texas." When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!" The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas." After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender replied, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident. Scared to death, the blind man started shouting, "Don''t flush, don''t flush!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cartoon characters does it take to screw in a light bulb? nine - three to find a light bulb, three to figure out how to remove the old one, three to screw it in, and all of them to complicate it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know, your computer hates you? When it grows and pop ups.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many animals can you fit into a pair of pantyhose? Now, think about it..... Ready??? ARE YOU SURE??? A: 10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 ass, 1 beaver, an unknown number of hares, and a fish no one can find.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know that you''re a computer geek? You catch a computer virus and take a virus scanning pill every week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What exactly does the government do? They seem to complicate all the simple things while trying to do the opposite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was an elderly couple. Next door, there lived a Peeping Tom. One day, the couple received a phone call. The woman said, "Fred! Peeping Tom tells us to shut the blinds or he''ll call the police!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day my wife was changing my daughter''s diaper, and my 3 year old son walked in and saw her and asked, "Mommy, where is her thingy?" I almost had a heart attack, laughing so hard that day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many worms does it take to screw in a light bulb? What kind of an idiot thinks worms can screw in light bulbs?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know that you''re a really boring person when someone steals your identity and then tries to give it back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into the ladies department of a store and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I''d like to buy a bra for my wife." "What type of bra?" asked the clerk. "Type?" inquires the man, "There is more than one type?" "Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color and material imaginable. "Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from." Relieved, the man asked about the types. The saleslady replied "There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer?" Now befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them. The saleslady responded, "It is all really quite simple... The Catholic type supports the masses. The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen, The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright, and the Baptist makes mountains out of mole hills."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Said the pig to his pop, "There''s the candy shop. Oh, please Let''s go inside." "And I promise I won''t make a kid of myself if you give me a people-back ride."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The idiots we have today. They''re so stupid they make turkeys seem smart. They even make sponges seem smarter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a man sitting at a bar just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half an hour. Then, a big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I''ll buy you another drink. I just can''t stand seeing a man crying." "No, it''s not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I''m late to my office. My boss, in an outrage, fires me. When I leave the building to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police say they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away. I go home and when I get there, I find my wife sleeping with the gardener. I leave home and come to this bar. And when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, "You look terrible. What''s the problem?" "My mother died in August," he said, "and left me $25,000." "Gee, that''s tough," he replied. "Then in September," the friend continued, "My father died, leaving me $90,000." "Wow. Two parents gone in two months. No wonder you''re depressed." "And last month my aunt died, and left me $15,000." "Three close family members lost in three months? How sad." "Then this month," continued, the friend, "absolutely nothing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk walked into a bar and, after staring for sometime at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I''m sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you worthless, insufferable, wretched, no good drunk!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three monks and a lady arguing about something that the lady was sure she was correct in, but could not convince the monks otherwise. She then prayed to God and asked for a sign. Lightning hit and she said, "Is that enough proof for you?" They replied that lightning strikes all the time and is a natural occurrence. She asked for another sign, and lightning struck a nearby tree; again, they denounced her, saying that it was a natural occurrence. She asked again and a voice rumbled from the sky saying, "SHEEEEE''S RIIIIGHTTTT!" She then thought she had beaten them, when one of them said, "Well, it''s still three to two."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde buys a box of laundry detergent, and it says on the box, "20 uses". A day later, the blonde calls the laundry detergent company and says, "I bought your product and the box says ''20 uses'', but all it does is my laundry!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man excitedly tells his mother he''s fallen in love and is going to get married. He says, "Just for fun, Mom, I''m going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I''m going to marry." The mother agrees. The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, "Okay, Mom. Guess which one I''m going to marry." She immediately replies, "The red-head in the middle." Stunned, the young man says, "That''s amazing, Mom. You''re right. How did you know?" "I don''t like her," she says.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golfer was having a round of golf with the local vicar. The golfer took his birdie put, but then a gust of wind blew the ball just wide of the hole. The golfer, being very bad tempered, then exclaimed "Damn - missed the bugger!". The vicar said to the man "Please do not use foul language again." They moved onto the next hole and exactly the same thing happened - a gust of wind blew the ball just wide. Once again the golfer shouted "Damn - missed the bugger!" This annoyed the vicar, so he turned to the man and said "Please do not use bad language again, or the heavens shall open and God will strike you down with a bolt of lightning!" But once again, on the next hole a gust of wind blew the ball just wide, and the golfer screamed "Damn - missed the bugger!" As soon as he said this the heavens opened and a lightning bolt shot down and struck the vicar. Then God''s voice boomed "Damn - missed the bugger!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tourist to New York City, Bob, was marveling at the Poe opera house. As a man passed by Bob asked "Was this building named for the great author and poet Edgar Allen Poe?" "No," replied the man, "the building was named for James Poe." "What did he write?" asked Bob. Said the man, "A check."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old woman went to visit her daughter and she found her naked, waiting for her husband. The mother asks the daughter, "What are you doing naked?" The daughter responds, "This is the dress of love." When the mother returns home, she strips naked and waits for her husband. When her husband arrives, he asks her, "What are you doing naked?" She responds, "This is the dress of love." "Well," he says to her, "go iron it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bosses were talking about how dumb their blond assistants are. The first boss says, "You think your assistant is dumb, watch this." And the man calls over the blond and says "Go to my house and see if I''m home." So the blond says "Yes sir! Right away sir!" and away she goes. The second boss says "You call that dumb! Watch this!" So he calls over his blonde assistant and says "Here''s a dime, go buy me a car." She replies "Yes sir! No problem!" and away the blond goes. On their way to go do the tasks given to them, they meet up and start talking. The first blond says "My boss is so stupid! He told me to go to his house and see if he''s home. I mean, why couldn''t he just call and see if he''s home! OH! The nerve!" The second blond says "You think that''s dumb? My boss gave me a dime to go buy him a car! Honestly! He didn''t even tell me what kind or color he wanted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Halfway along a commercial flight, a stewardess spoke out to the surprised passengers, "Ladies and gentlemen! We have the honor to announce that you happen to be aboard the 10,001st flight of Good Grace Airlines! To celebrate this historic event, we are glad to give each of you a special valuable gift." The passengers immediately broke into a cheerful applause, congratulating each other on the sudden luck they had. Then one man said aloud, "This is really exciting! But why didn''t you choose the 10,000th flight? I suppose it''s a better number for a celebration." "Certainly we did," replied the stewardess, "but unfortunately, because that flight crashed, we decided to shift the celebration."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid was sitting on his lawn with a litter of puppies one morning. George Bush was on his morning run, accompanied by some Secret Service workers. He kindly asked the boy what kind of puppies they were. The little boy said, "Republicans." The President beamed, patted the boy on the head, and said, "Atta boy!" A few weeks later Bush was jogging again, this time with Dick Cheney in tow. Bush stopped at the boy''s house, winked at Dick and said, "Hi little boy, what kind of puppies are those?" The boy said, "Democrats." Bush was shocked and crushed. "What happened? A few weeks ago they were Republicans!" The boy answered, "Well, then the puppies opened their eyes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A helicopter was flying in Seattle when suddenly an electrical malfunction disabled all electronic navigation and communication equipment. Due to the amount of fog, the pilot could not determine the helicopter''s position. He spotted a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER." The pilot thanked them by smiling and waving, determined the route to SEATAC airport and landed safely. When they were finally on the ground, his co-pilot asked him how he''d done it. "I knew it had to be the Microsoft building, because they gave me a technically correct but utterly and completely useless answer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fill in the blank to this odd analogy. Quiz is to quizzical as test is to _______', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she shows up on radar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ladies and gentlemen, This five-letter-word little thing belongs to men, and no women. Some men have long ones, others shorter. It''s straight in some men, and crooked in others. It may turn soft or hard in just a matter of seconds. Useless to some, it boasts manhood for others. Children wonder about it, young men are proud of it, while old men see their age in it. And whatever it is, some women love it, while others are afraid of it. What is that darn thing anyway? Scroll down for ANSWER - - - - - - - - - - - - - - beard, of course! what else? ;-)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Your richest relative buys an "expensive" house and you have to help take the wheels off of it. 2.You refer to the sixth grade as graduation. 3.Your wife''s new hairdo gets destroyed by the ceiling fan. 4.Your front porch collapses and hurts more than three dogs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man was in bed with his wife when suddenly he let out a loud fart. He yelled, "7 points!" His wife looked at him and said, "What the hell are you doing?" He simply replied, "Just playing bed football." Ten minutes later the wife let a loud one and said, "Tie game - 7,7." The husband''s competitive side kicked in and he started starting straining... when suddenly he crapped his pants! His wife looks over and said, "Now what''s the score?" He said, "Still 7,7. End of quarter; switch sides!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From an interview with a millionaire: "What is your secret to making money?" "Quite simple. Before entering business I observed that most of the sales profits are generally lost in the handling of complaints and refunds. So I made my decision to try to eliminate these expenses." "I can say that''s quite a big task!" "Not for me. I simply started selling parachutes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the similarity between tyrannosaurus and blondes with an IQ greater then 200. A: Both are extinct.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once a blond police officer stopped a man and asked for his driving license. She saw it and told the man "it says here that you must wear glasses" The man said "I have contacts" The blond said "I don''t care who you know, you are still getting a traffic ticket"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W Bush wanted a special postage stamp issued, with his picture on it. He instructed his Postmaster General, stressing that it should be of international quality. When the stamps were released, Bush heard complaints that the stamps were not sticking properly, and he become furious. He called the chief of the Secret Service and ordered him to investigate the matter. The chief checked the matter out at several post offices, and then reported on the problem to Bush. He said, "Sir, the stamp is really of international quality. The problem is, our citizens are spitting on the wrong side!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W. Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar. A guy walks in and asks the barman, "Isn`t that Bush and Powell sitting over there?" The barman says, "Yep, that`s them." So the guy walks over and says, "Wow, this is a real honor. What are you guys doing in here?" Bush says, "We`re planning World War III". And the guy says, "Really? What`s going to happen?" Bush says, "Well, we`re going to kill 140 million Iraqis and one intelligent blonde." The guy exclaimed, "Intelligent blonde! Why kill a blonde?" Bush turns to Powell, punches him on the shoulder and says, "See, smart ass? I told you no one would worry about the 140 million Iraqis!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new business was opening and one of the owner''s friends wanted to send flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card; it said "Rest in Peace". When the friend found out, she became angry and called the florist to complain. After she had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry she was, the florist said. "Madam, I''m really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry you should imagine this: somewhere there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying, "Congratulations on your new location".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that nobody can lick their elbow? *75% of the people that read this try it*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a southern university, students in the psychology program were attending their first class on emotional extremes. "Just to establish some parameters," said the professor to the student from Arkansas, "what is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," said the student. "And the opposite of depression?" he asked of the young lady from Oklahoma. "Elation," she said. "And you sir," he said to the young man from Texas, "what about the opposite of woe?" The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be''giddy up'' ".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three little boys were sitting around talking about their fathers. The first boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings." The second boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings out of his nose." The third boy said, "Well, my dad can blow smoke rings out of his butt." The first and second boys where amazed. The second boy said, "Have you seen him do it?" "No," said the third boy, "but I''ve seen the tobacco stains on his underwear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy eats at a restaurant. At the end of the meal, the guy looks at the check: Salads . . . . . . $3 Steak . . . . . . $10 Works . . . . . . .$5 Cola . . . . . . . $2 ----------------------- Total $20 The customer asked the waiter "What''s ''works''?" "This time it didn''t work" said the waiter and crossed out that row.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny kept spelling the word "went" wrong, instead he spelt "whent". His teacher, who was very fusterated, decided to keep him after class to spell "went" 100 times. The next day she comes into the classroom, thinking he learned his lesson, and sees the whole board is full of the word "went". But at the end... "I wrote "went" 50 times, then I ran out of space, so I whent home"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10 sentences teachers say (and their true meanings) 1. This book is very commonly used (I also studied from it 40 years ago) 2. It''s important to understand what the material means in general (I''m not good with details) 3. Some might say... (My guess is...) 4. The answer to that question is not in the syllabus (I don''t know the answer to your question) 5. We''ll discuss that question next week (I don''t know the answer to your question) 6. I''ll let you search in the dictionary and find out (I don''t know how to spell that word) 7. Some of you could have succeeded more in the test (You all failed) 8. Are there any questions about the material we learned last lesson? (Did any of you review the material as I asked?) 9. Today we''ll split up into small studying groups (I don''t feel like teaching today so keep yourselves busy) 10. The homework is due on Monday (Ruining your weekend is the only fun I have left in teaching)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher, a thief and a lawyer all die in the same freak accident. So when they reach the pearly gates, St. Peter tells them that, unfortunately, heaven is overcrowded, so they each have to answer a question correctly for admission. The teacher is first, and St. Peter asks, "Name the famous ship that was sunk by an iceberg?" "Phew, that one''s easy," says the teacher, "The Titanic." "Alright," said St.Peter, "you may pass." Then the thief got his question: "How many died on the Titanic?" The thief replied, "That''s a toughy, but fortunately I just saw the movie. The answer is 1500 people." And so he passed through. Last, St. Peter gave the lawyer his question: "Name them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond and a brunette were opening their paychecks when the blond asked the brunette what she was going to buy. The brunette replied, "I think I''ll buy a new set of plates because mine are chipped. What are you going to buy?" The blond said, "I think I''m gonna buy a new butt, because my old one has an enormous crack in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this woman who had a blonde daughter. One day, she got her ball stuck in the tree. "Mom, my ball''s stuck in the tree. Can I go get it?" she asked. "No, the perverted boy will look up your skirt and see your underwear. Wait till daddy gets home." The little girl furiously stomped away. About an hour later, before her husband came home, the woman saw her daughter playing with her ball. "How did you get your ball?" "Well, you said that you didn''t want the boy to see my underwear, so I took it off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred and his brother, "Donkey" walk into a pub and Fred gets the first pint in and says, "I''ll have a pint for me and a pint for Donkey." The two guys drink their pints and Fred says, "Right donkey your round; I''ll have a pint of Guiness." Donkey walks up to the bar and says, "2 p p p p pints of g g g g Guiness p p p please." While donkey gets the pints, Fred goes to the toilet and the barman says, "Say, you shouldn''t let him call you that stupid nickname." Donkey replies, "I know. He aw.. he aww... he awwwwww, he always calls me ''Donkey.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Chinese couple got married and were now known as Mr. Wong and Mrs. Wong. However, they didn''t know why, but they couldn''t have white children. So they went to the doctor to find out what the problem was, and they told him the story and the doctor replied, "Didn''t you know?" "Two Wongs don''t make a white!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cinderella, Superman and Pinocchio die and go to heaven. On their way they talk: Cinderella: "I want to be remembered as the most beautiful girl in the world." Superman: "I want to be remembered as the strongest person in the world." Pinocchio: "I want to be remembered as the greatest liar in the world." It''s Cinderella''s turn. She goes into the room and comes out smiling, saying, "It''s done. I''m the most beautiful girl in the world!" Then goes Superman. He goes into the room and comes out happy, saying, "It''s done. I''m the strongest person in the world!" Last comes out Pinocchio, angrily he says: "Damn! who''s this Clinton guy?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb??? None, they will just have there robot do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Bob (a boy) went to Sally (a beautiful girl). Bob told her, "Sal, Jack (a boy) wants you." She replied, "I know." They stand in silence for a while. Bob finally said, "I mean he needs your help." "Oh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girls are in the shower for at least an hour. Incredibly guys can take a shower in 5 minutes. Very beautiful girls are seldom intelligent. Even blond guys have some brains. Married women marry hoping their guy will change. Every man marries hoping their wife wont change. Pretty girls can usually get what they want. Unlike good looking guys who still have to suffer. Some girls are actually great relationship material. Some guys cant find those girls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are talking over a beer, discussing various sex positions. The first guy says, "My favorite position is the ''rodeo'' position." "What is the ''rodeo'' position, and how do you do that?" asks the second man. The first guy explains, "Well, first you tell your wife to get on the bed on all fours, and then you do it doggy- style. Once things start to get underway, and she''s really into it, you lean forward and whisper in her ear, ''Your sister likes this position too...'' Then, try to hang on for 8 seconds."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, whenever someone says that you''re nobody, remember nobody''s perfect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What haunts the closets of a haunted house? The SOULS of shoes! What''s a ghosts favourite dessert? I-scream! What was the ghosts favorite baseball team? The BOO Jays! What room is a ghost not allowed to go inside? The Living room Why didn''t the vampire have fun on his vacation? He SUCKED all the fun out of it! If a snow man and a vampire got married and they had a baby what would the baby be? A Snowvam! Where do monsters love to visit in New York? The Vampire State Building. Why did the vampire''s friend break up with him? Because he was a pain in the neck! Why do witches use brooms to fly on? Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy! What kind of street do zombies like best? Dead ends! What is a vampire''s favourite mode of transportation? A blood vessel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the mother match say to the baby match? Don''t scratch your head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a person who says that they are going to tell on you? You say: Too late, I already told.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a cat comes walking by meowing, "I can''t do anything right." So he keeps on pouting and somebody comes up to him and says, "Why are you crying?" "Because I can''t do anything right." So the guy helps the cat and a day later the cat could do anything right so he goes to the litter box and misses the box by an inch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the teenager cross the road? Because his parents told him not to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is a man''s idea of helping you with the housework? A: Lifting up his legs so you can vacuum underneath them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little johnny was going to school. Incredibly he found a genie and was given 3 wishes. "Can I have a piece of candy?" he said. "Kid, I am a powerful genie ask for something else." "Mmmm, ok, give me 2 pieces of candy." "You think I have time for such small wishes? Don''t ask for something so small." "I want candy." "Ok kid here you go; infinite candy." "Cool, thank you." "Ok whats your second wish? Kid, i don''t have all day." "But I still have 3 wishes.."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pet store and asks for a German shepperd. The shopkeeper, replies that it will cost him $500. The man thinks for a minute, then asks how much a beware of dog sign costs. The shopkeeper calmly replies that it costs a whopping $1.98. The man thinks for a while longer, and asks for a beware of dog sign.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the government have but never uses to make life simple? Their power!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was at a bar about to drink his drink. Then, a tough looking biker came and just drank the first man''s drink. The first man said "Why did you do that? I have been having a horrible day. First, I wake up, am late for work, and get fired. Then, I come home to find my wife cheating, I get kicked out of the house, and I get beat up by a bunch of thugs. Finally, I was about to end it all by drinking that cup of poison that you drank!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Name:_________ 1. Finish this pattern: a,_,c,d,e,f (hint, B) 2. If you are standing, what are you doing? (hint, standing) 3. Finish the sentence: I am a blond______ 4. Explain Einstein''s theory, or spell cat 5. Are you writing with a pen/pencil or a tissue? (hint pen/pencil) 6. Spell the word chicken', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that every time she turned around it was her birthday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. It is the new hip thing to rot your teeth. 2. They are highly non-nutritous. 3. In case of weak teeth, just bite into the hard candy. 4. For absolutely no good reason. 5. Makes you sick so that you do not have to go to school. 6. To get hyperactive so that you are not sleepy when you get out of bed. 7. Because the candy is saying, "Eat me!!!" 8. Because your tummy is growling and you think it is annoying. 9. In case you got an urge to suck on something. 10. Because the noises that the candy makes when it bangs against your teeth makes a relaxing sound for the mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving down the road when he spots 2 priests on the side nailing signs into the ground. The first sign says, "The End is Near!!" The man turns to look at the other mans sign and it reads, "Turn back while you still can!" The man then sticks his head out his car window and yells, "Leave everyone alone, you religious nutcases!" as he drives by. A few seconds later the two priests hear a splash. The first priest turns to the second and says, "Maybe we should just put up a ''Bridge Out'' sign."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are so ugly your mum has to feed you with a slingshot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which came first - the chicken or the egg? It depends on who got laid first!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eight year old Sally brought her report card home from school. Her marks were good, mostly A''s and a couple of B''s. However, her teacher had written across the bottom: "Sally is a smart little girl, but she has one fault. She talks too much in school. I have an idea I am going to try, which I think may break her of the habit." Sally''s dad signed her report card, putting a note on the back: "Please let me know if your idea works on Sally because I would like to try it out on her mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elevator operator complained that he was getting tired of people asking him for the time. A friend suggested that he hang a clock in his elevator. A few weeks later, the friend inquired as to how things were going. "Just awful!" declared the elevator operator. "NOW, all day long, people ask me, "Is the clock right?" exclaimed the elevator operator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re getting old when... your sweetie says, "Let''s go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Honey, I can''t do both!" your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you''re barefoot. a sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door. you don''t care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don''t have to go along. you are cautioned to slow down by the doctor, instead of the police. "Getting a little action" means, "I don''t need to take any fiber today." "getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot. an "all nighter" means not getting up to pee!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the store manager returned from lunch, he noticed his clerk''s hand was bandaged, but before he could ask about the bandage, the clerk had some very good news for him. "Guess what, sir?" the clerk said. "I finally sold that terrible, ugly suit we''ve had so long!" "Do you mean that repulsive pink-and-blue double-breasted thing?!" the manager asked. "That''s the one!" "That''s great!" the manager cried, "I thought we''d never get rid of that monstrosity! That had to be the ugliest suit we''ve ever had! But tell me, why is your hand bandaged?" "Oh," the clerk replied, "after I sold the guy that suit, his seeing-eye dog bit me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Albert Einstein arrives at a party and introduces himself to the first person he sees and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers "241." "That is wonderful!," says Albert. "We will talk about the Grand Unification Theory and the mysteries of the Universe. We will have much to discuss!" Next Albert introduces himself to a woman and asks, "What is your IQ?" To which the lady answers, "144." "That is great!," responds Albert. "We can discuss politics and current affairs. We will have much to discuss!" Albert goes to another person and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers, "51." Albert responds, "How ''bout them Cowboys?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a young hooker named Gail whose price was tattooed on her tail. And on her behind, for the sake of the blind, was the same information in Braille.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a torrential rain soaked South Louisiana; the next morning the resulting floodwaters came up about 6 feet into most of the homes. Mrs. Boudreaux was sitting on her roof with her neighbor, Mrs. Wilson, waiting for help to come. Mrs. Wilson noticed a lone baseball cap floating near the house. Then she saw it float far out into the front yard, then float all the way back to the house; it kept floating away from the house, then back in again, over and over. Her curiosity got the best of her, so she asked Mrs. Boudreaux, "Do you see that baseball cap floating away from the house, then back again?" Mrs. Boudreaux said, "Oh yes, that''s my husband; I told him he was going to cut the grass today come Hell or high water!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many ears did Davy Crockett have? 3 - His right ear, his left ear, and his wild front-ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton and Al Gore went into a local diner for lunch. As they read the menu, the waitress came over and asked Clinton, "Are you ready to order, sir?" Clinton replies, "Yes, I''d like a quickie." "A quickie?!" the waitress replies with disgust. "Sir, given the current situation of your personal life, I don''t believe that''s a good idea. I''ll come back later when you are ready to make an order from the MENU." She walks away. Al Gore leans over to Clinton and says, "Sir, it''s pronounced ''Quiche''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THINGY: female: Any part under a car''s hood. male: The strap fastener on a woman''s bra VULNERABLE: female: Fully opening up one''s self emotionally to another. male: Playing football without a helmet. COMMUNICATION: female: The sharing of thoughts and feelings with one''s partner. male: Leaving a note before suddenly taking off for the weekend with the boys. BUTT: female: The body part that "looks bigger" no matter what is worn. male: What you slap when someone scores a touchdown, home run, or goal. Also good for mooning. COMMITMENT: female: A desire to get married and raise a family. male: Trying not to pick up other women while out with the girlfriend. ENTERTAINMENT: female: A good movie, concert, play or book. male: Anything that can be done while drinking. FLATULENCE: female: An embarrassing by-product of digestion. male: An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and essential element of male bonding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve all heard of TGIF - Thank God It''s Friday, right? Well my Secretary refers to Friday as POETS day... Piss Off Early, Tomorrow''s Saturday....!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gary: I don''t think I deserve a zero on this test. Teacher: I agree, but it''s the lowest mark I can give you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hygiene Teacher: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects? Jose: Don''t bite any.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a short story to show you that the stodgy air traffic controllers and the flyers they serve can have a sense of humor: The controller who was working a busy pattern told the 727 on downwind to make a three-sixty (to do a complete circle, usually to provide spacing between aircraft). The pilot of the 727 complained, "Do you know it costs us two thousand dollars to make a three-sixty in this airplane? Without missing a beat the controller replied, "Roger, give me four thousand dollars worth!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First guy (proudly): "My wife''s an angel!" Second guy: "You''re lucky, mine''s still alive."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Alfred, how can one person make so many mistakes in one day? Alfred: I get up early.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill & Hillary Clinton were sleeping at the White House. Hillary wakes up and starts shaking Bill to wake him up. "Bill, Bill wake up." Bill continues sleeping. Hillary shouts, "Bill, Bill wake up." Bill finally wakes up and says, "What do you want?" Hillary responds, "I have to go use the bathroom." Bill says, "Please tell me you didn''t wake me up just to tell me you have to go to the bathroom." Hillary says, "No, I just wanted to tell you to save my spot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Soup manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America''s shelves this week with "Clinton Soup," that will honor one of the nation''s most distinguished men. It consists primarily of a small weenie in hot water. Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill Clinton. The Dodge Drafter will begin production in Canada this year. When Clinton was asked what he thought about foreign affairs, he replied: "I don''t know, I never had one." American Indians have nicknamed Bill Clinton as "Walking Eagle" because he is so full of crap he can''t fly. Clinton only lacks three things to become one of America''s finest leaders: Integrity, vision, and wisdom. Clinton is doing the work of three men: Larry, Curly, and Moe. Revised judicial oath: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth as I know it, the whole truth as I believe it to be, and nothing but what I think you need to know."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman decided to have her portrait painted. She said to the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets, a ruby brooch and Rolex watch." "But you aren''t wearing any of those things," said the artist. "I know," she said. "It''s in case I should die before my husband. I''m sure he will remarry right away, and I want his new wife to go crazy looking for the jewelry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don''t get mad at me.....I know we''ve been friends for a long time, but I just can''t think of your name! I''ve thought and thought, but I can''t remember it. Please tell me what your name is." Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly women were eating at a restaurant one morning. Ethel noticed something funny about Mabel''s ear and she said, "Mabel, did you know you''ve got a suppository in your left ear?" Mabel answered, "I have? A suppository?" She pulled it out and stared at it. Then she said, "Ethel, I''m glad you saw this thing. Now I think I know where my hearing aid is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While making rounds, a doctor points out an X-ray to a group of first year medical students. "As you can see," she says, "the patient limps because his left fibula and tibia are radically arched. Michael, what would you do in a case like this?" "Well," ponders the student, "I suppose I''d limp too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we didn''t have ten years ago. Willy: Me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures, tacked to a bulletin board, of the 10 most wanted men. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. "Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want him very badly." So Little Johnny asked, "Then why didn''t you keep him when you took his picture?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde girl was at school staring at a puzzle on her desk that she could not figure out. The teacher comes by and tells her, "You can solve it! Just use your head!" The teacher comes back to check on the blonde and she saw her head all bruised up. The teacher said, "What happened?!" Then the blonde says, "Well, you told me to use my head."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Zack and his mule were walking down the road when one of Zack''s friends drove up and offered him a ride to town. Zack got into the truck while his mule ran along behind. The mule was right in back of them as they reached 55, and stayed with them as they sped up to 70. "I''m worried about your mule," said the driver, "his tongue''s hanging out." "Which way?" asked Zack. "Left," his friend said. "Well, stay in this lane - he''s about to pass." shouted Zack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a bi-partisan move, President Bush has nominated Dr. Hannibal Lecter as his candidate for US Surgeon General. "I think Dr. Lecter will serve with pride, fava beans, and a nice Chianti," Bush announced. In another announcement, Special Agent Clarice Starling will become the new FBI director. She''s expected to work closely with the new Surgeon General on a case concerning missing former Vice President Al Gore. President Bush had recently arranged a meeting between Gore and Lecter. Lecter was the last person to see Gore before Gore''s sudden disappearance in early January. Lecter noted that he, "enjoyed having Gore for dinner," but was upset at how Gore, or, rather the *subject* of Gore kept "coming up." "I''m sick to my stomach over this," Lecter said. President Bush didn''t seem concerned with the disappearance of his rival for the office. "I think it''s all crap by now, don''t you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Next time you start to groan at friend''s pun, ask yourself: Am I just being jealous?: "A pun is the lowest form of humor -- when you don''t think of it first." --Oscar Levant "Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted." --Fred Allen "A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents." --G. C. Lichtenberg', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on. The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded." The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers...those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would." But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed: "You''re all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There''s no guts, no heart, and no spine, and the head and butt are interchangeable."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just think, if it weren''t for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winners of a New York Magazine contest who were asked to take a well-known expression in a foreign language, change a single letter and provide a definition for the new expression RESPONDEZ S''IL VOUS PLAID: Honk if you''re Scottish HARLEZ-VOUS FRANCAIS?: Can you drive a French motorcycle? VENI, VIPI, VICI: I came, I''m a very important person, I conquered. COGITO EGGO SUM: I think; therefore I am a waffle. RIGOR MORRIS: The cat is dead. QUE SERA SERF: Life is feudal. LE ROI EST MORT. JIVE LE ROI: The king is dead. No kidding. POSH MORTEM: Death styles of the rich and famous. PRO BOZO PUBLICO: Support your local clown. MONAGE A TROIS: I am three years old. HASTE CUISINE: Fast French food. QUIP PRO QUO: A fast retort. ALOHA OY: Love; greetings; farewell; from such a pain you should never know. MAZEL TON: Tons of luck. VISA LA FRANCE: Don''t leave your chateau without it. CARNE DIEM: Seize the meat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He''s lying" was placed in the copier, and the police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn''t telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was recently hired at an office. Her first task was to go out for coffee. Eager to do well her first day on the job, she grabbed a large thermos and hurried to a nearby coffee shop. She held up the thermos and the coffee shop worker quickly came over to take her order. "Is this big enough to hold six cups of coffee?" the blonde asked. The coffee shop worker looked at the thermos, hesitated a few seconds, then finally replied, "Yeah. It looks like about six cups to me." "Oh good!" the blonde sighed in relief. "Then give me two regular, two black, and two decaf."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man inserted an ''ad'' in the classified: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LEARNING CHINESE That''s not right: Sum Ting Wong Are you harboring a fugitive?: Hu Yu Hai Ding? See me ASAP: Kum Hia Nao Stupid Man: Dum Gai Small Horse: Tai Ni Po Ni Did you go to the beach?: Wai Yu So Tan? I bumped into a coffee table: Ai Bang Mai Ni I think you need a face lift: Chin Tu Fat It''s very dark in here: Wai So Dim? I thought you were on a diet: Mun Ching? This is a tow away zone: No Pah King You are not very bright: Yu So Dum I got this for free: Ai No Pei Please stay a while longer: Wai Go Nao? Stay out of sight: Lei Lo He''s cleaning his automobile: Wa Shing Ka Your body odor is offensive: Yu Stin Ki Pu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly his boat was attacked by the Loch Ness monster. In one easy flip, the beast tossed him and his boat high into the air; then it opened its mouth to swallow both. As the man sailed head over heels, he cried out, "Oh, my God! Help me!" At once, the ferocious attack scene froze in place, and as the atheist hung in mid-air, a booming voice came down from the clouds, "I thought you didn''t believe in Me!" "Come on God, give me a break!!" the man pleaded. "two minutes ago I didn''t believe in the Loch Ness monster either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest and a rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train. After a while, the priest put down his book and opened a conversation by saying, "I know that, in your religion, you''re not supposed to eat pork... but have you really never even tasted it?" The rabbi closed his newspaper and responded, "I must tell you the truth. Yes I have, on the odd occasion." The rabbi had his turn of interrogation. He asked, "I know that in your religion, you''re supposed to be celibate... but..." The priest interjected, "Yes, I know what you are going to ask, and yes, I have succumbed to temptation once or twice." The two resumed their reading. There was silence for a while. Then the rabbi peeked around his newspaper with a smile and said, "Better than pork, isn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: "Doctor, you gotta help me. I''m under a lot of stress. I keep losing my temper with people." Doctor: "Tell me about your problem." Patient: "I just did, you moron!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a woman says: This place is a mess! C''mon! You and I need to clean up! Your stuff is lying on the floor and you''ll have no clothes to wear if we don''t do laundry right now! What a man hears: blah,blah,blah,blah, C''MON, blah,blah,blah,blah, YOU AND I blah, blah,blah,blah, ON THE FLOOR blah,blah,blah,blah, NO CLOTHES blah,blah,blah,blah, RIGHT NOW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In pharmacology, all drugs have generic names: Tylenol is acetaminophen, Advil is ibuprofen, & so on. The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra and announced today that they have settled on mycoxafailin. Also considered were mycoxafloppin, mydixadrupin and mydixarizin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister decided to do something a little different one Sunday morning. He said "Today, church members, I am going to say a single word and you are going to help me preach. Whatever single word I say, I want you to sing whatever hymn that comes to your mind." The pastor shouted out, "Cross." Immediately the congregation started singing in unison, "The Old Rugged Cross." The Pastor hollered out "Grace." The congregation began to sing, "Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound..." The Pastor said, "Power." The congregation sang, "There is Power in the Blood." The Pastor said, "Sex." The congregation fell in total silence; everyone was in shock. They all nervously began to look around at each other, afraid to say anything. Then, way in the back of the church, a little old grandmother stood up and began to sing, ........."Precious Memories".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven? I asked the children in my Sunday school class. "NO!" the children all answered. "If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?" Again, the answer was, "NO!" "Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my wife, would that get me into Heaven?" Again, they all answered, "NO!" "Well," I continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?" A five-year-old boy shouted out, "YOU GOTTA BE DEAD!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stupid Things Said In The World Of Soccer: 1. Well, it''s Liverpool two, Ipswich nil, and if the score stays this way, I''ve got to fancy Liverpool for the win. 2. He had an eternity to play that ball, but took too long. 3. And so they have not been able to improve on their 100% record. 4. With the last kick of the game, he scored with a header. 5. Well, it''s a fabulous kaleidescope of colour: almost all the Brazilians are wearing yellow shirts. 6. If that had gone on, it would definitely have been a goal. 7. Their manager, Howard Wilkinson, isn''t here today, which strongly suggests that he may be elsewhere. 8. I am a firm believer that if one team scores a goal, the other needs to score two to win. 9. If a team scores early on, it often takes an early lead. 10. You cannot possibly have counted the number of passes made, but there were eight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the entire world was a stage and God was the director, what we need is a rehearsal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CNN gets news that 100 blonds are killed in a train accident at Marylebone station. Only one blond left alive. The correspondent goes to her and asks, "Miss, how did it happen?" Blond: "Oh don''t ask about it. All were right as long as all were waiting on the platform for the train. Then came the announcement that ''The bakerloo line will arrive on platform number 2'' so when everyone heard that the train is coming on the platform, everyone ran to the rails to save their lives, and the train arrived on the rails!!!" Correspondent: "Thank god you thought well and didn''t go to the rails" Blond: "Oh no, I was on the rails for committing suicide and after the announcement I came to the platform!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A visitor from Pakistan was strolling in a park in New Delhi, India, enjoying the greenery and flowers. He needed to empty his bladder badly, but couldn''t find a urinal anywhere. He couldn''t hold out any longer, and went behind a large bush. Just as he was undoing his fly buttons a policeman caught him. "What do you think you are doing?" asked the constable. "I want to pee," replied the visitor. "I am from Pakistan and I don''t know where to go. Please help me out." The constable ordered, "OK, follow me. I''ll show you a place with more greenery, flowers and bushes than this park. You can pee there as much as you like." He took the Pakistani to a greener and more beautiful garden where he emptied his bladder. The Pakistani emptied his bladder, thanked the policeman and asked "Whose garden is this, it is so beautiful?" The constable replied, "This is the garden of the Pakistani High Commission."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman awoke excitedly on Valentine''s Day and announced enthusiastically to her husband, "I just dreamt that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine''s Day! What do you think it means?" With certainty in his voice, the man said, "You''ll know tonight." That evening, the man came home with a small package and handed it to his wife. With anxious anticipation the woman quickly opened the package to find a book entitled, "The Meaning of Dreams."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are married women heavier than single women? Single women come home, see what''s in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what''s in bed and go to the fridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy asked his mother, "Can I go over to Little Johnny''s house and watch the magic show?" Billy''s mother replied, "Whatever do you mean, dear?" He answered, "The one Johnny''s mom performs. I heard her tell Miss Figpot that she got $600 for doing six tricks last night. That must be some kind of show!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bounty - The Quicker Picker-Upper Chevy Truck - Like A Rock Energizer - It Keepsa Going And Going KFC - Finger Lickin'' Good McDonals - We Love To See You Smile M&M''s - It Melts In Your Mouth, Not In Your Hands Nike - Just Do It Pringles - Once You Pop, You Can''t Stop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was giving confession, and he told the priest that he was having impure thoughts about his sister. "Is this a sin, Father?" he asked. The priest nodded and said, "Yes, Little Johnny, indeed, it is a sin. Look at the two beautiful brothers you have."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Hollywood is going to remake The Exorcist? The new movie is about a mother who hires the Devil to get a priest out of her son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I see a monk''s ass I just grab it. Said the lazily amorous abbot. "Although it''s more fun, To have sex with a nun, It''s so hard to get into the habit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the church service one Sunday, a parishioner was speaking about an emotionally charged topic and had trouble controlling her tears. Finishing her remarks, she told the congregation, "I apologize for crying so much. I''m usually not such a big boob." The bishop rose to close the session and remarked, "That''s okay. We like big boobs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is black and white and green and black and white? A: Two nuns fighting over a sweaty pickle. Q: What is black and white and grinds up and down, up and down? A: A nun churning butter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is black and white and gooey and creamy? A: A nun eating a bowl of Tapioca pudding. Q: What is black and white and makes a wet, sucking sound? A: A toothless, elderly nun eating a Communion wafer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If two black cats walk by each other, then do they both get bad luck? Does the more disgusting foods mean that they are healthier? When you get your first pair of scissors you need a pair of scissors to open the pair of scissors that you just got. So how are you going to get it open?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid-December. Female reindeer retain their antlers till after they give birth in the spring. Therefore, according to every historical rendition depicting Santa''s reindeer, every single one of them, from Rudolph to Blitzen- had to be a girl. We should''ve known. Only women, while pregnant, would be able to drag a fat man in a red velvet suit all around the world in one night and not get lost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9. Why it''s good to have five pairs of black shoes. 8. The difference between cream, ivory, and off-white. 7. Crying can be fun. 6. Fat clothes. 5. A salad, diet drink, and a hot fudge sundae make a balanced lunch. 4. Discovering a designer dress on the clearance rack can be considered a peak life experience. 3. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made. 2. A good man might be hard to find, but a good hairdresser is next to impossible. And the number one thing only women understand... 1. Other women!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day. The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the Cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail a few feet in front of the sheriff. "Howdy, stranger..." "Howdy, Sheriff..." The cowboy then moved slowly to the back of his horse, lifted its tail, and placed a big kiss were the sun don''t shine. He dropped the horse''s tail, stepped up on the walk, and aimed toward the swinging doors of the saloon. "Hold on, Mister..." "Sheriff?" "Did I just see what I think I just saw?" "Reckon you did, Sheriff...I got me some powerful chapped lips..." "And that cures them?" "Nope, but it sure keeps me from lickin'' em.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Carol was having trouble with her computer. So she called Glenn, the computer guy, over to her desk. Glenn clicked a couple buttons and solved the problem. As he was walking away, Carol called after him, "So, what was wrong?" And he replied, "It was an ID Ten T Error." A puzzled expression ran riot over Carol''s face. "An ID Ten T Error? What''s that ... in case I need to fix it again??" He gave her a grin... "Haven''t you ever heard of an ID Ten T Error before?" "No," replied Carol. "Write it down," he said, "and I think you''ll figure it out." (She wrote...) I D 1 0 T', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy goes into a restaurant for a Christmas breakfast while in his home town for the holidays. After looking over the menu he says, "I''ll just have the eggs Benedict." His order comes a while later and it''s served on a big, shiny hubcap. He asks the waiter, "What''s with the hubcap?" The waiter sings, "Oh, there''s no plate like chrome for the hollandaise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor made it his regular habit to stop off at a bar for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home. The bartender knew of his habit, and would always have the drink waiting at precisely 5:03 p.m. One afternoon, as the end of the work day approached, the bartender was dismayed to find that he was out of hazelnut extract. Thinking quickly, he threw together a daiquiri made with hickory nuts and set it on the bar. The doctor came in at his regular time, took one sip of the drink and exclaimed, "This isn''t a hazelnut daiquiri!" "No, I''m sorry," replied the bartender, "it''s a hickory daiquiri, Doc."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest, and writers cramp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The newspaper obituary operator received a phone call. The woman on the other end asked, "How much do funeral notices cost?" "Five dollars per word, ma''am," came the response. "Good, do you have a paper and pencil handy?" "Yes, ma''am." "Okay, write this: ''Cohen died.'' " "I''m sorry, ma''am, I forgot to tell you there''s a five-word minimum." "Hmmph," came the reply. "You certainly did forget to tell me that." After a moment of silence, the woman continued, "Got your pencil and paper?" "Yes, ma''am." "Okay, print this: ''Cohen died. Cadillac for sale.'' "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. She wants her own intern. 9. She wants to complete her china and silver collection. 8. Brother-in-law Roger needs another pardon. 7. She wants to lease the Lincoln Bedroom to Marc Rich. 6. She wants to rename Camp David to Camp Denise. 5. She wants to pick up the rest of the furniture. 4. She wants to return to public housing. 3. She wants the top floor of the Trump Tower when she leaves. 2. She misses her hairdresser. 1. Bill needs a pardon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t blondes put in lightbubs? Because they keep breaking them with hammers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fellow was talking to his buddy, and he said, "I don''t know what to get my wife for her birthday. She has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I''m stumped." His buddy said, "I have an idea. Why don''t you make up a certificate saying she can have 60 minutes of great sex, any way that she wants it. She''ll probably be thrilled." So the fellow did. The next day his buddy asked, "Well? Did you take my suggestion?" "Yes, I did," said the fellow. "...And did she like it?" His buddy asked. "Oh yes! She jumped up, thanked me, kissed me on the forehead and ran out the door yelling, ''I''ll be back in an hour!'' She should be back any time now..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t women blink during foreplay? They don''t have time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A widow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('AT LAST SOMEONE SUMMED IT UP... The nice men are ugly. The handsome men are not nice. The handsome and nice men are gay. The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married. The men who are not so handsome but are nice men have no money. The men which are not so handsome but are nice men with money think we are only after their money. The handsome men without money are after our money. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don''t think we are beautiful enough. The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money are cowards. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and are heterosexual are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!! The men who never make the first move, automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative. NOW... WHO UNDERSTANDS MEN?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy was staggering home with a pint of booze in his back pocket when he slipped and fell heavily. Struggling to his feet, he felt something wet running down his leg. "Please Lord," he implored, "let it be blood!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If love is blind is then why is lingerie so popular?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 100 lawyers jumping out of an airplane? Skeet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('McQuillan walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olive and placing it in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the Irishman started to leave. "S''cuse me," said a customer, who was puzzled over what McQuillan had done, "what was that all about?" "Nothin''," said the Irishman. "My wife just sent me out for a jar of olives!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest''s breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?" "Just water," says the priest. The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?" The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He''s done it again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man told his doctor that he just wasn''t able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English... What''s wrong with me?" "Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you''re simply a lazy old fart." "Thank you for your candor," said the man. "Now give me the medical term, so I have something to tell my wife!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don''t know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we''ve been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. "I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, I get undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and yells at me for staying out so late!" His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you''re obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, slap her on the butt and say, ''You as horny as I am?'' She always acts like she''s sound asleep!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the Knight-Rider News Service, the inscription on the metal bands used by the U.S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington Biological Survey, abbreviated: "Wash. Biol. Surv." until the agency received the following letter from an Arkansas camper: "Dear Sirs: While camping last week I shot one of your birds. I think it was a crow. I followed the cooking instructions on the leg tag and I want to tell you it was horrible." The bands are now marked Fish and Wildlife Service.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a teenage girl smiles at a boy, he tries to decide what makes him so sexy. When a young lady smiles at a man in his fifties, he turns around to see who''s the handsome dude behind him. But when a female of any age smiles at a man of 80, he looks down to see if he''s unzipped', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him. He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, a pessimist by nature, and invited him to hunt with him and his new dog. As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. The friend saw everything but did not say a single word. On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, "Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?" "I sure did," responded his friend. "He can''t swim."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Indians asked their Chief in autumn, "Chief, is this coming winter going to be mild or cold?" Not really knowing an answer, and knowing it was better to err on the side of caution, the chief replied, "It is uncertain at this time, but we should begin to prepare just in case. Collect wood as if it is going to be cold, and I''ll see what more I can learn." Being a good leader, he then went to the phone and called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is this winter going to be mild or cold?" The man on the phone responded, "This winter was going to be quite cold indeed." So the Chief went back to speed up his people to collect even more wood to be prepared. A week later, he again called the National Weather Service again, "Is it going to be a cold winter?" "Yes," the man replied, "it''s going to be an extremely cold winter. The Indians are collecting all the wood they can find!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father knelt with his son to hear his prayers. The three-year-old boy began in all seriousness: "Our Father who Art in Heaven, how do You know my name?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And another four-year-old prayed: "And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pilot: "Pilot to tower. I am 300 miles from land. 600 feet over water and running out of fuel. Please instruct!" Tower: "Tower to pilot. Tower to pilot. Repeat after me, ''Our Father, who art in heaven...''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes into the store and asks the clerk, "I''d like some Polish sausage." The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?" The guy, clearly offended, says, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you: if I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German sausage, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican? Huh? Would ya??" The clerk says "Well, no..." With deep self righteous indignation, the guy says, "Well, alright then, why the HELL did you ask me if I''m Polish just because I ask for Polish sausage?" The clerk says "Because this is a hardware store."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are some winners: Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the reader who doesn''t get it. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very high. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of obtaining sex. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. Karmageddon: It''s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it''s, like, a serious bummer. Glibido: All talk and no action. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl asked her father, "Daddy? Do all fairy tales begin with ''Once Upon A Time''?" He replied, "No, there is a whole series of fairy tales that begin with ''If elected, I promise''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man joined the priesthood. The order he joined could not speak for seven years; and then they could only say two words. The first seven years passed and they went into a small room. His two words were "too cold". The next seven years passed and they took him back into the small room and his two words were "bad food". The next seven years passed they took him back into the small room and his two words were "I quit". "Good," they said, "all you have done is complain."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a northern fairy tale and a southern fairy tale? A northern fairy tale begins with, "Once upon a time..." A southern fairy tale begins, "''Y''all ain''t gonna believe this..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This blonde was driving down an old country road when she spots another blonde in a wheat field rowing a boat. She pulls over to the side of the road and stops the car. Staring in disbelief she stands at the side of the road to watch the woman for a while. When she could not stand it any more she called out to the blonde in the field. "Why are you rowing a boat in the middle of the field?" The blonde in the field stops rowing and responds, "Because it is an ocean of wheat." The blonde standing on the side of the road is furious. She yells at the blonde in the field. "It is dumb blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name." The blonde in the field just shrugged her shoulders and began rowing again. The blonde on the side of the road was beside herself and shook her fist at blonde in the field yelling, "If I could swim, I would come out there and kick your tail!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- When Cupid shoots his arrow, I hope he Mrs. you. -If I were a head of lettuce, I''d cut myself in two. I''d give a leaf to everyone, but save the heart for you. -Can''t write, too dumb; inspiration won''t come. Bad ink, no pen; that''s all, amen. -My love fo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are men and parking spots alike? Good ones are always taken. Free ones are mostly handicapped or extremely short.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TOP 10 SLOGANS BEING CONSIDERED BY VIAGRA 10. Viagra, It''s "Whaazzzzz Up!" 9. Viagra, The quicker pecker upper 8. Viagra, Like a rock! 7. Viagra, When it absolutely, positively has to be there tonight. 6. Viagra, Be all that you can be. 5. Viagra, Reach out and touch someone. 4. Viagra, Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman! 3. Viagra, Tastes great!......... More filling! 2. Viagra, We bring good things to life! And the number one slogan, being considered by Viagra: 1. This is your penis.........This is your penis on drugs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The angry preacher... The preacher rose with a red face. "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the K.K.K. This is a horrible lie, and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family!" No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you not have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood. Remember, you will be forgiven and in our heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression!" Again all was quiet. Slowly a drop dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would not stop rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke. "Reverend, there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I told a couple of friends you were a wizard under the sheets."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Tearful Bride... A new young blonde bride calls her mother in tears. She sobs, "Robert doesn''t appreciate what I do for him." "Now, now," her mother comforted, "I am sure it was all just a misunderstanding." "No, mother," you don''t understand. "I bought a frozen turkey roll and he yelled and screamed at me about the price!" "Well, the nerve of that lousy cheapskate!" says her mom. "Those turkey rolls are only a few dollars." "No, mother it wasn''t the price of the turkey, it was the airplane ticket." "Airplane ticket.... What did you need an airplane ticket for?" "Well mother, when I went to fix it, I looked at the directions on the package and it said - ''Prepare from a frozen state,'' so I flew to Alaska!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The phone call... A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The wife (a blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, "How should I know, that''s 200 miles from here!" and hung up. Curious, the husband said, "Who was that?" And his lovely wife replies, "I don''t have any idea who it was. It was some stupid woman wanting to know "if the coast is clear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde came home from her first day commuting into the city. Her mother noticed she was looking a little peaked and asked, "Honey, are you feeling all right?" "Not really," the blonde replied. "I''m nauseous from sitting backward on the train." "Poor dear," Mom said. "Why didn''t you ask the person sitting across from you to switch seats for a while?" "I couldn''t," she replied, "there was no one there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An overweight blonde consulted her doctor for advice. The doctor advised that she run 10 miles a day for 30 days. This, he promised, would help her lose as much as twenty pounds. The blonde follows the doctor''s advice, and, after thirty days, she was pleased to find that she''d indeed lost twenty pounds. She phoned the doctor and thanked him for the wonderful advice which produced such effective results. At the end of the conversation, however, she asked one last question: "How do I get home, since I am now 300 miles away?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was visiting Washington, DC for the first time. She wanted to see the Capitol building. Unfortunately, she couldn''t find it, so she asked a police officer for directions - "Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Capitol building?" The officer replied, "Wait here at this bus stop for the number 54 bus. It''ll take you right there." She thanked the officer and he drives off. Three hours later the police officer returned to the same area and, sure enough, the blonde is still waiting at the same bus stop. The officer got out of his car and said, "Excuse me, but to get to the Capitol building, I said to wait here for the number 54 bus and that was three hours ago! Why are you still waiting?" The blonde replied, "Don''t worry, officer, it won''t be long now... The 45th bus just went by!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a blonde gathering, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease. "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "That''s easy," he replied. "You ask them a simple question which everyone should be able to answer with no trouble. If they hesitate, that puts you on the right track." "What sort of question would you ask Doctor?" "Well, you might ask them..." "Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?" The blonde thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh - "You wouldn''t happen to have another example would you?" "I must confess I don''t know much about history."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are waiting at a bus stop. When a bus pulls up and opens the door, one of the blondes leans inside and asks the bus driver: "Will this bus take me to 5th Avenue?" The bus driver shakes his head and says, "No, I''m sorry." Hearing this, the other blonde leans inside, smiles, and twitters: "Will it take ME?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following sign was posted at a fast food restaurant owned by two blondes: "Parking for drive-through customers only!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde kept having the same weird dream everyday, so she went to her doctor. Doctor: What was your dream about? Blonde: I was being chase by a vampire! Doctor: (giggles quitely) So... what was the scenery like? Blonde: I was running in a hall way. Doctor: Then what happened? Blonde: Well that''s the weird thing. In every single dream, the same thing happened. I always came to this door, but I couldn''t open it. I kept pushing the door and pushing the door, but it wouldn''t budge! Doctor: Did the door have any letters on it? Blonde: Yes it did. Doctor: And what did these letter spell? Blonde: It said "Pull"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam and a beautiful woman walk into a very posh Beverly Hills furrier. "Show the lady your finest mink!" the fellow exclaims. So the owner of the shop goes in back and comes out with an absolutely gorgeous full-length coat. As the lady tries it on, the furrier discreetly whispers to the man, "Ah, sir, that particular fur goes for $65,000." "No problem! I''ll write you a check!" "Very good, sir," says the shop owner. "Today is Saturday. You may come by on Monday to pick it up, after your check has cleared." So Sam and the woman leave. On Monday, the Morris returns. The store owner is outraged: "How dare you show your face in here? There wasn''t a single penny in your checking account!" "I just had to come by," grinned Sam, "to thank you for the most wonderful weekend of my life!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top Ten signs your co-worker is a computer hacker 10. You ticked him off once and your next phone bill was for $20,000. 9. He''s won the Publisher''s Clearing House sweepstakes 3 years running. 8. When asked for his phone number, he gives it in hex. 7. Seems strangely calm whenever the office computer network goes down. 6. Somehow gets HBO on his PC at work. 5. Mumbled, "Oh, puh-leeez" 95 times during the movie "The Net." 4. Massive 401k contribution made in half-cent increments. 3. His video dating profile lists "public-key encryption" among hobbies. 2. When his computer starts up, you hear, "Good Morning, Mr. President." 1. You hear him murmur, "Let''s see you use that Visa card now, Professor I-Don''t-Give-A''s-In-Computer-Science!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes were the dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life. "Were these dishes ever washed?" he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the grit and grime. She replied, "They''re as clean as Soap and Water could get them." He felt a bit apprehensive, but blessed the food anyway and started eating. The meal was really delicious and he said so, despite the dirty dishes. When dinner was over, the hostess took the dishes outside and called, "Here Soap! Here Water!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The zoology teacher asked a small boy to make a sentence using the word "possum." He answered, "Maw got horny and gave possum."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, old folks are worth a fortune; they have silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet, and gas in their stomachs. You''re getting old when you don''t care where your wife goes, just so long as you don''t have to go along too. You''re getting old when you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn''t do anything the night before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday, I heard from a drug rep for Glaxo who told me that they are on the verge of launching a new herbal remedy that they think will take the market by storm. This drug sounds so promising that I want to suggest to my friends that they consider buying stock in the company. The drug is called Gingko Viagra, and its function is to help you remember what the fuck you are doing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Jane initially met Tarzan in the jungle, she was very very attracted to him, and during her questions about his life she asked him how he managed for sex. "Tarzan not know sex," he replied. Jane explained to him what sex was. Tarzan said, "Oh, Tarzan use soft hole in tree trunk." Horrified, she said, "Tarzan, you have it all wrong, but I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothes, laid down on the ground and spread her legs wide. "Here," she said, "you must put it in here." Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer to get a better look, got an enormous erection and gave her an almighty kick in the crotch. Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, "What did you do that for?" Tarzan replied, "Tarzan always check for squirrels!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man from Hybernia, Who Rhymed himself into a hernia. He became adept At this practice except For occasional anti-climaxes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a plant''s favorite school year? KinderGARDEN!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the lunch lady say to the boiled egg? You''re in hot water now!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "Why does an elephant have a trunk?" Student: "Because it doesn''t have a glove compartment!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman sends her clothing out to the Chinese laundry. When it comes back, there are still stains in her panties. The next week she encloses a note to the Chinese laundryman that says, "Use more soap on panties." This goes on for several weeks, the woman sending the same note to the laundry. "Use more soap on panties." Finally, fed up, the Chinese man responded with his own note that said, "Use more paper on ass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, "Your first job will be to sweep the entire store." "But I''m a college graduate," the young man replied indignantly. "Oh, I''m sorry. I didn''t know that," said the manager. "Here, give me the broom. Let me show you how."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So there''s this Wizard who worked in a factory. Everything was satisfactory except that certain miscreants, taking advantage of his good nature, would steal his parking spot. This continued until he put up the following sign: "This parking space belongs to the Wizard. ... Violators will be toad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman and her husband interrupted their vacation to go to the dentist. "I want a tooth pulled, and I don''t want any pain killers because I''m in a big hurry," the woman said. "Just extract the tooth as quickly as possible, and we''ll be on our way." The dentist was quite impressed. "You''re certainly a courageous woman," he said. "Which tooth is it?" The woman turned to her husband and said, "Show him your tooth, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa. Hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg in a car crash? He''s all right now. How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path. What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall? "Dam." What do you call Santa''s helpers? Subordinate Clauses. What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand? Quatro sinko. What is a zebra? 26 sizes larger than an "A" bra. Where do you find a no legged dog? Right where you left him. Where do you get virgin wool from? Ugly, fast sheep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother, accompanied by her small daughter, was in New York City. The mother was trying to hail a cab, when her daughter noticed several wildly dressed women who were loitering on a nearby street corner. The mother finally hailed her cab and they both climbed in, at which point the young daughter asks her mother, "Mommy, what are all those ladies waiting for by that corner?" The mother replies, "Those ladies are waiting for their husbands to come by and pick them up on the way home from work." The cabby, upon hearing this exchange, turns to the mother and says, "Ah, C''mon lady! Tell your daughter the truth! For crying out loud... They''re hookers!" A brief period of silence follows, and the daughter then asks, "Mommy, do the hooker ladies have any children?" The mother replies, "Of course, Dear. Where do you think cabbies come from?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and a daughter are shopping in the mall, when the mother eyes an expensive fur coat. "This year," she says, "I think that I will buy my present instead of making you and dad shop for me." The daughter protests, "But mom, some helpless, poor creature has to suffer so that you can have this." "Don''t worry honey," says the mother, "your father won''t get the bill for a couple of weeks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL - 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR''S DOG 1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer 2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES: 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15 TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH ITS OWN 1993 MUSTANG, 5L, AUTO, EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800 COWS, NEVER BRED... ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE. 83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK -- $2000 GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE. FREE 1 CAN OF PORK & BEANS WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME. FOR SALE: LEE MAJORS (6 MILLION DOLLAR MAN) - $50 NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED *************CALL CHUBBIE NICE PARACHUTE: NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE SLIGHTLY STAINED', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A local church built a new sanctuary. They moved their very fine old pipe organ from to the new sanctuary. It was an intricate task that was completed successfully. The local news heralded, . . . "St. Paul Completes Organ Transplant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe and Frank were in the office, and noticed that someone had put up a suggestion box with some 3x5 cards next to it. Both decided that this was a great idea, and each took a card to fill out. Joe wrote, "The office workers should all be given raises!" When he looked at Frank''s card, it said "Can we all have raises, and keys to the executive washroom, and personal secretaries, and new company cars, and new coffee cups, and longer lunch breaks, and an extra three weeks vacation each year, and a holiday on St. Patrick''s Day, and Columbus Day and Martin Luther King''s Birthday?" Joe said, "Frank, that isn''t the right way of getting things changed around here - you shouldn''t put all of your begs in one ask-it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom, the fisherman, wrote the following to a mail order catalogue, "Please send me one of those gasoline engines for my boat you show on page 438, and if it''s any good, I''ll send you a check." A few days later, Tom received the following reply, "Please send check. If it''s any good, we''ll send the engine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Hunter was called to serve for jury duty, but asked to be excused because she didn''t believe in capital punishment and didn''t want her personal thoughts to prevent the trial from running its proper course. But the public defender liked her thoughtfulness and tried to convince her that she was appropriate to serve on the jury. "Madam," he explained, "this is not a murder trial! It''s a simple civil lawsuit. A wife is bringing this case against her husband because he gambled away the $12,000 he had promised to use to remodel the kitchen for her birthday." "Well, okay," agreed Mrs. Hunter, "I''ll serve. I guess I could be wrong about capital punishment after all!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying; DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG! posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor besides the cash register. He asked the store manager, "Is THAT the dog folks are supposed to beware of?" "Yep, that''s him," he replied. The stranger couldn''t help but be amused. "That certainly doesn''t look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?" "Because," the owner replied, "before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A World War II pilot is reminiscing before school children about his days in the air force. "In 1942," he says, "the situation was really tough. The Germans had a very strong air force. I remember," he continues, "one day I was protecting our bombers and suddenly, out of the clouds, these fokkers appeared. At this point, several of the children giggle. "I looked up, and right above me was one of them. I aimed at him and shot him down. They were swarming. I immediately realized that there was another fokker behind me." At hearing the pilot go on, the girls in the auditorium start to giggle and boys start to laugh. The teacher stands up and says, "I think I should point out that ''Fokker'' was the name of the German-Dutch aircraft company" "That''s true," says the pilot, "but these nazi fokkers were flying Messerschmidts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Viagra now available in liquid form. FDA officials today announced the release of the wonder drug Viagra in a new, easy-to-take liquid form. It is sold under the name "Mydixadrill." Now when men come home from work in the evening, they can pour themselves a stiff one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stalking into a police station late one night, a man demands to speak to the burglar who broke into his house. "Sorry, that''s against the law," says the desk sergeant. "You don''t get it," says the man. "I need to know how he got in without waking my wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#1 rule of a redneck- If duck tape don''t fix it (doubt it), mount it on the wall instead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar wearing a pair of jumper cables around his neck. The bartender looks at him and says, "Hey buddy, don''t try to start anything..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was missing her boyfriend, so she decided to write him the following brief letter: Dear Anthony, I''ve been unable to sleep since I broke off our engagement. Won''t you forgive and forget? Your absence is breaking my heart. I was a fool... nobody can take your place. I love you. All my love, Kathy xoxo P.S. Congratulations on winning this week''s lottery...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bernie was invited to his friend''s home for dinner. Morris, the host, called his wife by many endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice. After all these years, you still call your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head and whispered, "To tell the truth, I forgot her name years ago."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the football game with the 0-0 score? Never mind, it''s pointless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Henry goes to confession and says, "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. Last night I was with seven different women." The priest says, "Take seven lemons, squeeze them into a glass and drink the juice without pausing." "Will that cleanse me of my sins, Father?" "No," replies the priest. "But it''ll wipe that silly grin off your face."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This man walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder and the bar tender asks him, "What''s your newt''s name?" and the man replies, "Tiny" and the bar tender says, "Why is he called Tiny?" and the man replies, "Because he is minute." (minute means small)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that when she sits around the house, she dosen''t just sit around the house, she sits around the whole neighborhood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock "Who''s there?" "Boo" "Boo who?" "Why are you crying?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three babys - a blond, a redhead, and a brunet. They were fighting over who''s mommy had the best bra. The first baby says "My mom has a foam bra." The second says "My mom has gel straps." The blond baby says "Well, the tag on my moms bra says double D." The blond won the fight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last she threw a towel around her head & stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The female skier Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo)... The famous Olympic skier Picabo Street is not just an athlete, she is a nurse. She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital. She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, "Picabo, ICU".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside: The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!" My friend replied, "I''m already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor." Pastor questioned, "How come I don''t see you except at Christmas and Easter?" He whispered back, "I''m in the secret service."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. this Christmas. This isn''t for any religious constitutional reason. They simply have not been able to find three wise men and a virgin in the Nation''s capitol. There was, however, no problem finding enough asses to fill the stable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I shall seek and find you, I shall take you to bed and have my way with you, I will make you ache, shake, and sweat until you moan and groan. I will make you beg for mercy, you will beg for me to stop. I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I''m finished with you. You will be weak for days. You have been warned, my love, by... THE FLU!! Now get your mind out of the gutter and go get a flu shot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on "Science & Nature." Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best form of birth control after 50? Nudity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 lbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? 45 minutes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does the bride always wear white? Because it''s good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t bunnies make noise when they have sex? Because they have cotton balls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts? Beer Nuts are $1, and Deer Nuts are always under a buck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy had been feeling down for so long that he finally decided to seek the aid of a psychiatrist. He went there, laid on the couch, spilled his guts then waited for the profound wisdom of the psychiatrist to make him feel better. The psychiatrist asked him a few questions, took some notes then sat thinking in silence for a few minutes with a puzzled look on his face. Suddenly, he looked up with an expression of delight and said, "Um, I think your problem is low self-esteem. It is very common among losers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During their silver anniversary, a wife reminded her husband: "Do you remember when you proposed to me, I was so overwhelmed that I didn''t talk for an hour?" The hubby replied: "Yes, honey, that was the happiest hour of my life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks past a mental hospital and hears a moaning voice "13.......13.......13.........13" the man looked over to the hospital and saw a hole in the wall, he looked through the hole and gets poked in the eye. The moaning voice then groaned ''14.........14.........14.......14.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so ugly you remind me of an elephants bottom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a toad and a horny toad? One says "Ribbit ribbit" and the other says "Rubbit rubbit".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kindergarden teacher had a pupil tell her he had found a frog. She inquired as to whether it was dead or alive. "Dead," she was informed. "How do you know?" she asked. "Because I pissed in his ear," said the child innocently. "You did WHAT?" squealed the teacher in surprise. "You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went ''Pssst''. He didn''t move!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and George W. Bush were set to face a firing squad in a small Central American country. Bill Clinton was the first one placed against the wall and just before the order was given he yelled out, "Earthquake!" The firing squad fell into a panic and Bill jumped over the wall and escaped in the confusion. Al Gore was the second one placed against the wall. The squad was reassembled and Al pondered what he had just witnessed. Again, before the order was given Al yelled out, "Tornado!" Again, the squad fell apart and Al slipped over the wall. The last person, George W. Bush, was placed against the wall. He was thinking, "I see the pattern here; just scream out something about a disaster and hop over the wall". He confidently refused the blindfold as the firing squad was reassembled. As the rifles were raised in his direction, he grinned from ear to ear and yelled, "Fire!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was driving up the interstate late one night when he was amazed to see a weird creature overtake him at a great speed. He accelerated in an attempt to catch up with it, but the creature was far too quick for him and he dimly saw it run off the highway on an exit. The driver followed, only to see it jump over a hedge and disappear into some woods. Nearby stood a farmhouse; the driver stopped his car, walked up to the door and knocked. The driver apologized to the farmer for bothering him and asked him about the creature. "Oh yes," said the farmer, "that''s one of my specially bred three-legged chickens. I bred them so that when we have roast chicken for dinner, my wife, my son and myself can have a chicken leg each." "Really?" asked the man. "That''s amazing! How do they taste?" "I don''t know," replied the farmer. "I haven''t been able to catch one yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of managers was given the assignment to measure the height of a flagpole. They got their ladders and tape measures and went out to the flagpole. However, the measurement job turned out to be much more difficult than any of them had expected, with some of them falling off the ladders, some dropping their tape measures and so on, and the whole thing had just turned into a big disaster. After a while, an engineer happened to walk by and saw what the managers were attempting to do. She walked over, pulled the flagpole out of the ground, and laid it flat on the ground. She measured it from end to end, gave the measurement to one of the managers and then walked away without saying a word. After the engineer was out of sight, one manager turned to another and laughed as he shook his head. "Now that''s just like an engineer! We''re looking for the height and she gives us the length!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was reading Bible stories to his young son. He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." His son asked, "What happened to the flea?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to his doctor and says, "I don''t think my wife''s hearing is as good as it used to be. What should I do?" The doctor replies, "Try this test to find out for sure. When your wife is in the kitchen doing dishes, stand fifteen feet behind her and ask her a question, if she doesn''t respond keep moving closer asking the question until she hears you." The man goes home and sees his wife preparing dinner. He stands fifteen feet behind her and says, "What''s for dinner, honey?" He gets no response, so he moves to ten feet behind her and asks again. Still no response, so he moves to five feet. Again, no answer. Finally he stands directly behind her and says, "Honey, what''s for dinner?" She replies, "For the fourth time, I SAID CHICKEN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the first day of their Honeymoon, the blonde bride slipped into a sexy but sweet nightie and, with great anticipation, crawled into bed, only to find that her new Catholic husband had settled down on the couch. When she asked him why he was apparently not going to make love to her, he replied, "Because it''s Lent." Almost in tears, she remarked, "Well, that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard! To whom did you lend it, and for how long?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So Many Men, So Few Who Can Afford Me. God Made Us Sisters, Prozac Made Us Friends. My Mother Is A Travel Agent For Guilt Trips. Princess, Having Had Sufficient Experience With Princes, Seeks Frog. Coffee, Chocolate, Men ... Some Things Are Just Better Rich. Don''t Treat Me Any Differently Than You Would The Queen Warning: I Have An Attitude And I Know How To Use It. Of Course I Don''t Look Busy...I Did It Right The First Time. Do Not Start With Me. You Will Not Win. Sorry If I Looked Interested. I''m Not. If You Want Breakfast In Bed, Sleep In The Kitchen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The perfect man is gentle Never cruel or mean He has a handsome smile And keeps his car so clean. The perfect man likes children And will raise them by your side He will be a good father A good husband to his bride. The perfect man loves cooking Cleaning and vacuuming too He''ll do anything in his power To convey his feelings to you. The perfect man is sweet Writing poetry from your name He''s a best friend to your mother And kisses away your pain. He never has made you cry Or hurt you in any way Oh, fuck this stupid poem The perfect man is gay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every Sunday, a little old lady placed $1,000 in the collection plate. This went on for weeks until the priest, overcome with curiosity, approached her. "Sister, I couldn''t help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate," he stated. "Why yes," she replied, "every week my son sends me money, and what I don''t need I give to the church." "That''s wonderful, how much does he send you?" "Oh, $2,000 a week." "Your son is very successful, what does he do for a living?" "He is a veterinarian," she answered. "That is a very honorable profession. Where does he practice?" "Well, he has one cat house in Kansas City and another in Dallas."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A musician who joined an orchestra on a cruise ship was having difficulty keeping time with the rest of the band. Finally, the captain said, "Either you learn to keep time or I''ll throw you overboard. . . . It''s up to you, sync or swim."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny went up to his father and asked, "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?" Johnny''s father replied, "Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, ''cause I still have mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic. "Here is the situation," she said. "A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows he can''t swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?" A girl raised her hand and asked, "To draw out all his savings?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cannibal took his young son for a walk in the jungle. They came across a beautiful, naked girl lying asleep on the ground. The boy got excited and said, "Let''s eat her now, Dad!" But the father said, "No, I have a better idea. Let''s bring her home and eat your mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him, "Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your trouble to bed with you." "I know," said the man, "but I can''t. My wife refuses to sleep alone..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Worried that they hadn''t heard anything for days from the widow in the apartment next door, the mother said to her son, "Tony, would you go next door and see how Old Mrs. Pierpoint is?" A few minutes later, Tony returned. "Well, is she all right?" asked the mother. "She''s fine, but she''s rather annoyed with you," remarked Tony. "At me?" the mother exclaimed. "Whatever for?" Tony replied, "Mrs. Pierpoint said it''s none of your business how old she is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a small town in the US, there is a rather sizeable factory that hires only married men. Concerned about this, a local woman called on the manager and asked him, "Why is it you limit your employees to married men? Is it because you think us women are week, dumb, cantankerous...or what?" "Not at all, Ma''am," the manager replied. "It is because our employees are used to obeying orders, are accustomed to being shoved around, know how to keep their mouths shut and don''t pout when I yell at them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The morning after their honeymoon night, the wife says to her husband, "You know, you''re really a lousy lover!" The husband replies, "How would you know after only 30 seconds?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy got on a bus one day and sat in the aisle seat beside an elderly lady. A few minutes later, he couldn''t control himself and had to let loose a big noisy fart. Embarrassed, he tried to make conversation with the lady and asked her "Do you by any chance have today''s paper?" The lady looked at him and said "No, but the next time we pass by a tree, I''ll grab you a handful of leaves."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends when the subject of marriage counseling came up. "Oh, we''ll never need that. My husband and I have a great relationship," the wife explained. "He was a communications major in college and I majored in theater arts." "He communicates real well and I just act like I''m listening."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe''s grandfather left him ten million dollars, and the next week Denise agreed to marry him. After three months of married life, Joe noticed that his beautiful new wife was ignoring him more and more. On the rare occasion that she would go to bed with him, she would be indifferent, or even worse, called out other men''s names! Whenever they went out in public, she ignored him and flirted with other men. Finally, he decided to confront her. "Denise" he said, "was the only reason you married me was because my grandfather left me ten million dollars when he died?" "Don''t be ridiculous," she replied, "I don''t care who gave you the money!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a wedding rehearsal, the pastor told the father of the bride, "As you give your daughter''s hand to the bridegroom, you should say something nice to him." The father, a department store manager, took the advice. During the wedding ceremony, he placed his daughter''s hand on his son-in-law''s arm and said, "No deposit, no return."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys are about to be executed and they are asked what they wish to have for their last meal. The Italian responds, Pepperoni Pizza, which he is served and then executed. The Frenchmen requests a Fillet Mignon, which he is served and then executed. The Newf requests a plate of strawberries. "STRAWBERRIES ????" "Yes, Strawberries." He is told, "But they are out of season!" "So, I''ll wait."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was this kid named Oddy, He always missed the Potty, He went some poops, and shouted out oops, Because Oddy Missed the Potty', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the number 0 say to the number 8? "Hey, nice belt!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Perfect Breakfast: You''re sitting at the table and: your son is on the cover of the box of Wheaties.... your mistress is on the cover of Playboy ... and your wife is on the back of the milk carton...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy, a dishonest lawyer, bribed one of his client''s jurors to hold out for a charge of manslaughter, fearing the murder charge being brought by the state. The jury was out for days before returning with the verdict: Manslaughter! Later, as Murphy paid off the corrupt juror, he asked him if he had a hard time convincing the other jurors to see things his way. "Boy, did I!" said the juror. "They kept voting to acquit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lonely wife brought a man she had just met at a bar home to her bedroom one evening when she thought her husband was out of town. They immediately tore each other''s clothes off and started going at it. She sat up quickly in bed as she heard the key in the lock. "Quick!" she said to the man, "it''s my husband! You''ve got to get out of here quick!" "Where''s the back door?" the man asked as he grabbed his clothes. "There isn''t one," she replied. "Where would you like one?" he asked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A writer died and was given the option of going to heaven or hell. She decided to check out each place first. As the writer descended into the fiery pits, she saw row upon row of writers chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they were repeatedly whipped with thorny lashes. "Oh my," said the writer. "Let me see heaven now." A few moments later, as she ascended into heaven, she saw rows of writers, chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they, too, were whipped with thorny lashes. "Wait a minute!" said the writer, "this is just as bad as hell." "Oh no, it''s not," replied an unseen voice. "Here, your work gets published."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnnie was late for class, and when he saw that the door was already closed, he opened it and went into the classroom tentatively. He very quietly shut the door and tiptoed to his seat hoping not to get the teacher after him. This upset the teacher, who said him, "Johnnie, is this how your father would have come in - late and sneaking to his seat? Go out and try it again, and get it right this time!" So, Little Johnnie left the room and shut the door behind him quietly, as he''d come in. Then a moment later, he flung open the door with a clatter and stomped back into the room with a lit cigarette dangling from his lips. He slammed the door behind him, put his cigarette out on the carpet with his foot and said, "So Honey, didn''t expect ME, did ya?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to a Texan on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their home lives. "Last night I made love to my wife four times," the Frenchman bragged, "and this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored me." "Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times," the Italian responded, "and this morning she made me a wonderful omelet and told me she could never love another man." When the Texan remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked, "And how many times did you make love to your wife last night?" "Once," he replied. "Only once?" the Italian arrogantly snorted. "And what did she say to you this morning?" "Don''t stop."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The head of a small industrial company posted a slogan all around the office and plant saying, "Do it now!" with the hope of getting better results from his workers. Some weeks later, when asked why he was removing the slogan signs, he said, "It worked too well. The bookkeeper skipped with $20,000, the chief clerk eloped with the best secretary I''ve ever had, three salesmen asked for raises, and the workers in the factory joined the union and are out on strike."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First, you get a little hoarse. Then, you get a little buggy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn''t have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn''t have to hear about the way his mother cooked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, "They wouldn''t take me out while I was alive, I don''t want them to take me out when I''m dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Walking up to a department store''s fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, "I want to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?" "Only one kiss per yard," replied the smirking male clerk. "That''s fine," replied the girl. "I''ll take ten yards." With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out and wrapped the cloth, then teasingly held it out. The girl snapped up the package and pointed to a little old man standing beside her. "Grandpa will pay the bill," she smiled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A vacationing golfer was out playing on a course that he had never played before. He hired a caddie from the pro shop to show him the layout of the course, and help him decide what shots to play. On the first tee, the golfer missed his shot, and it dribbled forward about 15 yards. He was slightly embarrassed, but determined to play a better second shot. He hit his second shot into the bordering fairway, and his third shot into a sand trap. By the time he holed out on this Par 4, he was 6 over par. The man turned to his caddie and said, "Well, I have never played this badly before!" To which the caddie replied, "I didn''t realize you had played before, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy went to a psychiatrist because he was having severe problems with his sex life. The psychiatrist asked him a lot of questions, but he couldn''t get a clear picture of the problems. Finally he asked, "Do you ever watch your girlfriend''s face while you''re having sex?" "Well, yes, I did once." "Well, how did she look?" "Oh boy, she looked very angry!" At this point the psychiatrist felt that he was really getting somewhere. "Well that''s very interesting, we must look into this further. Now tell me, you say that you have only seen your girlfriend''s face once during sex. That seems somewhat unusual. How did it occur that you saw her face that time?" "She was watching us through the window."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a cowboy bar and ordered a beer just as President Bush appeared on the television. After a few sips, he looked up at the television and mumbled, "Now, there''s the biggest horse''s ass I''ve ever seen." A customer at the end of the bar quickly stood up, walked over to him, and decked him. A few minutes later, as the man was finishing his beer, Mrs. Bush appeared on the television. "She''s a horse''s ass too," the man. This time, a customer at the other end of the bar quickly stood up, walked over to him, and knocked him off his stool. "Damn it!" the man said, climbing back up to the bar. "This must be Bush country!" "Nope," the bartender replied. "Horse country!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Leroy was at home doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine." At that moment, his mother came in and heard that he was cursing. "Leroy, what are you doing?! Why are you saying that?" Little Leroy answered, "I''m doing my math homework, Mom." She said, "And is that what your teacher taught you?" He replied, "Yes." The next day, the mother, worried about the education her son is receiving, goes to Little Leroy''s school to talk to the teacher. The mother said to his Math teacher, "I would like to know what you are teaching my son in math." The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition problems." Little Leroy''s mother asked, "Are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?" When the teacher stopped laughing she replied, "Not at all! What I taught them was two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH IS four."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He investigates ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL CRANIAL INVERSION. He is not a SEX MACHINE - He is ROMANTICALLY AUTOMATED. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY. He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES - He has an INTROSPECTIVE PORNOGRAPHIC MOMENT. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A beautiful woman walked into an orchard and found a lovely pool in it. She decided to go skinny-dipping. She looked around, didn''t see anyone, and undressed. Just as she was about to dive in, the orchard owner appeared from behind the bush where he was hiding all along and told her that swimming was prohibited. "You could have told me that before I undressed!" she scolded him. He replied, "Swimming is prohibited, undressing isn''t."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A noted sex therapist realized that people often lie about the frequency of their encounters, so he devised a test to tell for certain how often someone had sex. To prove his theory, he filled up an auditorium with people, and went down the line asking each person to smile. Using the size of the person''s smile, the therapist was able to guess accurately how often each person had sex. The last man in line was grinning from ear to ear. "Twice a day," the therapist guessed, but was surprised when the man said no. "Once a day, then?" Again the answer was no. "Twice a week?" "No." "Twice a month?" "No." When the doctor asked, "Once a year?" the man finally said yes. The therapist was angry that his theory hadn''t worked with this individual, and he asked the man, "What the heck are you so happy about?" The man answered, "Tonight''s the night!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Delivering his speech at the opening banquet of a national convention, the visiting minister told several anecdotes he expected to repeat at meetings the next day. Because he wanted to use the jokes again, he requested that the reporters omit them from any accounts they might turn in to their newspapers. A cub reporter, in commenting on the speech, ended his piece with the following: "The minister told a number of stories that cannot be printed here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women were paired together as partners in a club tournament and met on the putting green for the first time. After introductions, the first golfer asked the second, "What''s your handicap?" "Oh, I''m a scratch golfer," the other replied. "Really!" exclaimed the first woman, suitably impressed that she was paired up with such a strong player. "Yes, I write down all my good scores and scratch out the bad ones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says, "I''m sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are moving about in a Walmart when their carts collide. One says to the other, "Excuse me, but I''m looking for my wife." "What a coincidence, so am I, and I''m getting a little desperate." "Well, maybe I can help you. What does your wife look like?" "She''s tall, with dark hair, long legs, firm boobs, and a tight ass. What''s your wife look like?" "Never mind, let''s look for yours!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This will warm your heart, just when you have lost faith in human kindness.... Dear Safety Harbor Middle School, God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior citizens luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at the Safety Harbor Assisted Home for the Aged. All of my family has passed away. I am all alone now and it''s nice to know that someone is thinking of me. God bless you for your kindness to an old forgotten lady. My roommate is 95 and always had her own radio, but before I received one, she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was napping. The other day her radio fell off the night stand and broke into a lot of pieces. It was awful and she was in tears. She asked if she could listen to mine, and I said kiss my ass. Thank you for that opportunity. Sincerely, Edna Walters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hickory, Dickory Dock Three mice ran up the clock The clock struck one... The rest got away with minor injuries', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so the catcher walked up to have a talk with him. "I''ve figured out your problem," he told the young southpaw. "You always lose control at the same point in every game." "When is that?" "Right after the National Anthem."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into a vet''s waiting room. She''s dragging a wet rabbit on a leash. The rabbit does NOT want to be there. "Sit, Fluffy," she says. Fluffy glares at her, sopping wet, jumps up on another customer''s lap, getting water all over him. "I said ''SIT''! Now there''s a good Fluffy," says the woman, slightly embarrassed. Fluffy, wet already, squats in the middle of the room and pees. The woman, mortally embarrassed, shouts, "Darn it Fluffy, will you be good?!" Fluffy then starts a fight with a Doberman and pursues it out of the office. As the woman leaves to go after it, she turns to the rest of the flabbergasted customers and says, "Pardon me, I''ve just washed my hare and I can''t do a thing with it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. O''Donovan was walking down O''Connell Street in Dublin, and coming in the opposite direction was Father O''Rafferty. "Hello," said the Father, "And how is Mr. O''Donovan? Didn''t I marry you two years ago?" She replied, "You did that, Father." "And are there any little ones yet?" "No, not yet, Father," she said "Well now, I''m going to Rome next week, and I''ll light a candle for you." "Oh, thank you, Father," and away she went. Several years later they met again. "Well now, Mrs. O''Donovan," said the Father, "how are you?" "Oh, very well," said she. "And tell me," he said, "have you any little ones yet?" "Oh yes, Father. I''ve had three sets of twins, and four singles -- ten in all." "Now isn''t that wonderful?" he said, "and how is your wonderful husband?" "Oh," she said, "he''s gone to Rome to blow out your damned candle!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man in his eighties got up and was putting on his coat, when his wife said, "Where are you going?" The elderly man replied, "To the doctor''s." Surprised, his wife asked "Why, are you sick?" "No," he said, "I''m going to get me some of those new Viagra pills." With that, his equally elderly wife got up out of her rocker and started putting on her sweater. Surprised, he asked, "Where are you going?" "I''m going to the doctor, too." "Why?" She said, matter-of-factly, "If you''re going to start using that rusty old thing again, I''m going to get a tetanus shot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters went moose hunting every winter without success. Finally, they came up with a fool-proof plan. They got a very authentic female moose costume and learned the mating call of a female moose. The plan was to hide in the costume, lure the bull, then come out of the costume and shoot it. They set themselves up on the edge of a clearing, donned their costume, and began to give the moose love call. Before long, their call was answered as a bull came crashing out of the forest and into the clearing. When the bull was close enough, the guy in front said, "Okay, let''s get out and get him." After a moment that seemed like an eternity, the guy in the back shouted, "The zipper is stuck! What are we going to do?" The guy in the front said, "Well, I''m going to start nibbling grass, but you''d better brace yourself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love Marriage: Acceptance test possible you can try before you Buy. Arranged Marriage: Product is sold on an as is where is basis. Product once sold will not be taken back! Arranged Marriage is like Unix..boring n colorless... still extremely reliable n robust. Love Marriage is like Windows, beautiful n seductive........ yet one never knows when it will crash........', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A passenger jet was suffering through a severe thunderstorm. As the passengers were being bounced around by the turbulence, a young woman turned to a minister sitting next to her and with a nervous laugh asked, "Reverend, you''re a man of God, can''t you do something about this storm?" To which he replied, "Lady, I''m in sales, not management."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father watched his daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and innocent his little girl was. He went over to her and noticed she was looking at two spiders mating. "Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?" she asked. "They''re mating," her father replied. "What do you call the spider on top, Daddy?" she asked. "That''s a daddy longlegs," her father answered. "So, the other one is a mommy longlegs?" the little girl asked. "No," her father replied. "Both of them are daddy longlegs." The little girl thought for a moment, then took her foot and stomped them flat. "Well, we''re not having THAT sort of thing going on in our garden".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old country doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby. It was so far out, there was no electricity. When the doctor arrived, no one was home except for the laboring mother and her 5-year-old child. The doctor instructed the child to hold a lantern high so he could see, while he helped the woman deliver the baby. The child did so, the mother pushed and after a little while, the Doctor lifted the newborn baby by the feet and spanked him on the bottom to get him to take his first breath. The doctor then asked the 5-year-old what he thought of the baby. "Hit him again," the 5-year-old said. "He shouldn''t have crawled up there in the first place!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail with her girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome, extremely sexy young man entered. He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes away from him. The young man noticed her overly-attentive stare and walked directly toward her. Before she could offer her apologies for being so rude, the young man said to her, "I''ll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $20, on one condition." Flabbergasted, the woman asked, "What is the condition?" The young man replied, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words." The woman considered his proposition for a moment, reached into her purse and slowly counted out four $5 bills, which she pressed into the young man''s hand along with her address. She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly, meaningfully said... "Clean my house..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom was cleaning the house when she found her son''s hidden stash of S&M and sexual bondage magazines. Naturally, she was very upset and she didn''t know what to do. So, she waited until her husband got home to discuss it with him. After she showed him the magazines, she asked him, "Well, what are you going to do about it?" "I don''t know what to do." he told her. "I really don''t think I should give him a spanking for this!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was visitor''s day at the lunatic asylum. All the inmates were standing in the courtyard and singing "Ave Maria," and singing it beautifully. Oddly, each of them was holding a red apple in one hand and tapping it rhythmically with a pencil. A visitor listened in wonderment to the performance and then approached the choir. "I am a retired choir director," he said. "This is one of the best choirs I have ever heard." "Yes, I''m very proud of them," said the conductor. "You should take them on tour," said the visitor. "What are they called?" "Surely that''s obvious," replied the conductor. "They are the ''Moron Tapanapple Choir''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('See if you can do this: Read each line aloud This is this cat This is is cat This is how cat This is to cat This is keep cat This is a cat This is dumbass cat This is busy cat This is for cat This is forty cat This is seconds cat Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a man in his back yard trying to fly a kite. He throws the kite up in the air, the wind catches it for a few seconds then it comes crashing back down. He tries this a few more times all the while his wife is watching from her kitchen window. Muttering to herself how men need to be told how to do everything she opens the window and yells to her husband "You need more tail." The man turns with a confused look on his face and says, "Make up your mind, Honey. Last night you told me to go fly a kite!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy asked his mother: Mummy, why are you white and I am black? Don''t even ask me that, when I remember that party..., you are lucky that you don''t bark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the store the other day and I was in there for only about 5 minutes. When I came out there was a motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket. So I went up to him and said "Come on, buddy, how about giving me a break?" He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. So I called him a pencil-necked Nazi. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for worn tires! So I called him a piece of horse shit. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket! This went on for about 20 minutes; the more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote. I didn''t care. My car was parked around the corner. I try to have a little fun each day. It''s important.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were on their way to Heaven. God told them that the stairway to Heaven was 1000 steps, and that on every 5th step He would tell them a joke. He told them not to laugh at any of the jokes along the way or else they would not be able to enter Heaven. The brunette went first and started laughing on the 45th step, so she could not enter Heaven. The redhead went next and started laughing on the 200th step, so she could not enter Heaven either. Then, it was the blonde''s turn. When she got to the 999th step, she started laughing. "Why are you laughing?" God asked. "I didn''t tell a joke." "I know," the blonde replied. "I just got the first joke."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, said Little Johnny, "I''m late for football practice. Would you please do my homework for me?" Little Johnny''s father said irately, "Son, it just wouldn''t be right." "That''s okay," replied Little Johnny "You could at least give it a try, couldn''t you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and self- pitying. She moaned to her mom and brother, "Nobody loves me ... the whole world hates me!" Her brother, busily occupied playing a game, hardly looked up at her and passed on this encouraging word: "That''s not true, Mary. Some people don''t even know you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a clean joke? Bob took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Bobs neighbor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two men in a restroom, in stalls directly next to each other. Man #1 says "Hi there." Man #2, trying not to be rude, says, "Um...Hi" After a short silence, Man #1 speaks again saying, "So, how are things?" Man #2 replies, "Good.... I guess." Man #1 says, "Okay, honey, I have to go now, every time I talk to you on my phone this guy answers, bye."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Clinton and the Pope died on the same day, and due to an administrative foul up, Clinton was sent to heaven and the Pope was sent to hell. The Pope explained the situation to the devil, he checked out all of the paperwork, and the error was acknowledged. The Pope was told, however, that it would take about 24 hours to fix the problem and correct the error. The next day, the Pope was called in and the devil said his good byes as he went off to heaven. On his way up, he met Clinton who was on his way down. They stopped to chat. "Sorry about the mix up" says the Pope. "No problem," replies Clinton. "Well, I''m really excited about going to heaven." Clinton asks, "Why''s that?" "Well, I''ve always wanted to meet the Virgin Mary." President Clinton replies, "Sorry, but you''re a day late".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the crowded elevator descended, Mrs. Silverman became increasingly furious with her husband, who was delighted to be pressed against a gorgeous young blonde woman. As the elevator stopped at the main floor, the blonde suddenly whirled, slapped Mr. Silverman, and said, "That will teach you to pinch!" Bewildered, Mr. Silverman was halfway to the parking lot with his wife when he choked, "I . . . didn''t pinch that girl." "Of course you didn''t," replied his wife, consolingly. "I did."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross the Atlantic Ocean with the Titanic? A: Halfway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys were working on a high rise building project: Steve, Bill and Charlie. Steve falls off and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, Charlie says, "Someone should go and tell his wife." Bill says, "OK, I''m pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I''ll do it." 2 hours later, he comes back carrying a 6-pack. Charlie says, "Where did you get that, Bill?" "Steve''s wife gave it to me." "That''s unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you the beer?" Bill says, "Well not exactly. When she answered the door, I said to her, ''You must be Steve''s widow.''" She said, "''No, I''m not a widow." And I said, "Wanna bet me a six-pack?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. "Red meat is awful. Soft drinks erode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. "But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?" A old man in the front row stood up and said, "Wedding cake!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doc, I think my son has VD, a patient told his urologist on the phone. "The only woman he''s screwed is our maid." "Okay, don''t be hard on him. He''s just a kid," the medic soothed. "Get him in here right away and I''ll take care of him." "But I''ve been screwing the maid too, and I''ve got the same symptoms he has." "Then you come in with him and I''ll fix you both up," replied the doctor. "Well," the man admitted, "I think my wife has it too." "Oh crap!" the physician roared. "That means we''ve all got it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young ensign had nearly completed his first overseas tour of duty when he was given an opportunity to display his ability at getting the ship under way. With a stream of crisp commands, he had the decks buzzing with men and soon, the ship had left port and was steaming out of the channel. The ensign''s efficiency has been remarkable. In fact, the deck was abuzz with talk that he had set a new record for getting a destroyer under way. The ensign glowed at his accomplishment and was not all surprised when another seaman approached him with a message from the captain. He was, however, a bit surprised to find that it was a radio message, and he was even more surprised when he read, "My personal congratulations upon completing your underway preparation exercise according to the book and with amazing speed. In your haste, however, you have overlooked one of the unwritten rules - make sure the captain is aboard before getting under way."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I cannot see, I cannot pee; I cannot chew, I cannot screw; Oh, my God, what can I do? My memory shrinks, My hearing stinks, No sense of smell - I look like hell My mood is bad - can you tell? My body''s drooping, Have trouble pooping; The Golden Years have come at last - The Golden years can kiss my ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money. The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn''t been paid. The collections manager left a voice-mail for them saying, "We can''t ship your new order until you pay for the last one." The next day the collections manager received a collect phone call, "Please cancel the order. We can''t wait that long."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands. When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset. "You''re running around with other women," she charged. "You''re being unreasonable," Adam responded. "You''re the only woman on earth." The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve. "What do you think you''re doing?" Adam demanded. "Counting your ribs," said Eve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The minister was passing a group of young teens sitting on the Church lawn and stopped to ask what they were doing. "Nothing much, Pastor," replied one boy. "We were just seeing who can tell the biggest lie about their sex life." "Boys, boys, boys!" he scolded. "I''m shocked. When I was your age, I never even thought about sex." In unison they all replied, "You win!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere." Written just below it: "I do not."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent FDA study, the United States government doctors who were conducting studies on test drugs administered weekly doses of VIAGRA to an equal number of doctors and lawyers. While the majority of the doctors achieved enhanced sexual prowess, the lawyers simply grew taller. The researchers are at a loss to explain the phenomenon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harry walks into his supervisor''s office. "Boss," he says, "We''re doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff." "We''re short-handed, Harry," the boss replies. "I can''t give you the day off." "Thanks, boss," says Harry, "I knew I could count on you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A somewhat advanced society has figured how to package basic knowledge in pill form. A student, needing some learning, goes to the pharmacy and asks what kind of knowledge pills are available. The pharmacist says, "Here''s a pill for English literature." The student takes the pill and swallows it and has new knowledge about English literature! "What else do you have?" asks the student. "Well, I have pills for art history, biology, and world history," replies the pharmacist. The student asks for these, and swallows them and has new knowledge about those subjects. Then the student asks, "Do you have a pill for math?" The pharmacist says, "Wait just a moment," goes back into the storeroom, brings back a whopper of a pill, and plunks it on the counter. "I have to take that huge pill for math?" inquires the student. The pharmacist replied, "Well, you know math always was a little hard to swallow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snow White received a camera as a gift. She happily took many pictures of the Dwarves and their surroundings. When she finished her first batch, she took the film to be developed. After a week or so, she went to get the finished photos. The clerk said the photos were not back from the processor. Snow White was so disappointed that she started to cry. The clerk, trying to console her, said kindly, "Don''t worry, someday your prints will come."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was seen walking through downtown with a desk strapped to his back, a typewriter under one arm, and a wastebasket under the other. He was stopped by a policeman, asked what he was doing, and arrested when he replied, . . . "Impersonating an office, sir!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golfer, encountering a genie, was granted one wish. The man thought a while and said, "Well, I''ve always been embarrassed by being rather small, if you know what I mean; could you make me larger?" "Done," said the genie and disappeared. Continuing his game, the man noticed an immediate change in his "size." Within several holes, it was down to his knee, and by the eighteenth, it had crept into his sock. After holing his final putt, the man hurriedly returned to where he''d met the genie. "Problem?" inquired the genie. "Yes," the man responded, "Do you think I could trouble you for one more wish?" "And what might that be?" asked the genie. "Could you make my legs longer?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why don''t witches like to ride their brooms when they''re angry? A. They''re afraid of flying off the handle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When White man found this land, Indians were running it. No Taxes... No Debt... Plenty Buffalo... Plenty beaver! Women did most (all) of the work. Medicine Man free! Indian men hunted and fished all the time! Only White man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a German, an Italian and a Newfie on death row. The warden gave them a choice of three ways to die..... 1. To be shot 2. To be hung 3. To be injected with the AIDS virus for a slow death The German said, "Shoot me right in the head." Boom, he was dead instantly. The Italian said "Just hang me." With a snap of the rope he was dead. Then the Newfie said, "Give me some of that AIDS stuff." They gave him the shot and the Newfie fell down laughing. The guards looked at each other and wondered what was wrong with this guy. The Newfie said "Give me another one of those shots." The guards injected him again and now the Newfie was laughing so hard that tears rolled down his cheeks and he was doubled over laughing. Finally the warden said "What is wrong with you?" The Newfie replied, "You guys are so stupid...............I''m wearing a condom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? His lips are moving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The United States Treasury has announced they are recalling the new Minnesota quarters. We are recalling all of the new Minnesota quarters that were recently issued, Treasury Undersecretary said in a press conference Monday. This comes in the wake of numerous reports to this agency that the quarters will not work in parking meters, toll booths, vending machines, pay phones, or other coin-operated devices. We believe the problem lies in a design flaw. The winning design for the Minnesota quarter was submitted by Sven Petersen of New Ulm, Minnesota. Sven commented, "Apparently, da duct tape holding da two dimes ana nickel togedder keeps yamming da coin-slot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BLONDE woman goes to the post office to buy stamps for her Christmas cards. She says to the clerk, "May I have 50 Christmas stamps?" The clerk says, "What denomination?" The woman says, "God help us. Has it come to this? Give me 6 Catholic, 12 Presbyterian, 10 Lutheran and 22 Baptists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two blondes who went deep into the woods searching for a Christmas tree. After hours of subzero temperatures and a few close calls with hungry wolves, one blonde turned to the other and said, "I''m chopping down the next tree I see. I don''t care whether it''s decorated or not!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was out walking one day and went by a retirement home. As he passed the front lawn, he saw nine old ladies, basking in the sun in lounge chairs. When he looked closer, he realized that they were all stark naked. He went to the door and rang the bell. When the director answered the door, the man asked if he realized there were nine naked old ladies laying in the sun on the front lawn. The director said, "Yes," and went on to explain that the old ladies were all retired prostitutes living at the retirement home, and they were having a yard sale.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tired of having to stare at the luscious young kitten on the other side of the chain link fence, bold Tommy Tomcat decided to visit her one day. Settling back on his haunches, he gave a mighty leap and landed on the other side; impressed, the lovely cat sauntered over. "That was quite a leap," she remarked. "Want to go somewhere and cuddle?" "Afraid not," said Tommy, a pained expressions on his face. "The fence was higher than I thought."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three Irishmen, Paddy, Sean and Seamus, were stumbling home from the pub late one night and found themselves on the road which led past the old graveyard. "Come have a look over here," says Paddy, "It''s Michael O''Grady''s grave, God bless his soul. He lived to the ripe old age of 87." "That''s nothing," says Sean, "here''s one named Patrick O''Tool. It says here that he was 95 when he died." Just then, Seamus yells out, "Good God, here''s a fella that got to be 145!" "What was his name?" asks Paddy. Seamus stumbles around a bit, awkwardly lights a match to see what else is written on the stone marker, and exclaims, "Miles, from Dublin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The long term implications of drug research and medical procedures must be fully considered. Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and Viagra than is spent on Alzheimer''s Disease research. Medical researchers believe that by the year 2030 there will be a significant number of people wandering around with huge breasts and erections who can''t remember what to do with them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them. The beech says to the birch: "Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?" The birch says it cannot tell. Just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling. The birch says, "Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?" The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree and replies: "It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever put my pecker in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If however you do need to take Viagra, remember to swallow them quickly otherwise you''ll get a stiff neck. A shipment of Viagra was highjacked today. Police have put out an All-Points bulletin: Be on the lookout for two hardened criminals! They will face a stiff sentence when convicted and they''ll surely be sent to a Penal Institution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top 10 Summer Camps you should not send your kids to: 10. Tommy Lee''s---------- Camp Kickachickee 9. Lorena Bobbit''s------ Camp Cutaweewee 8. Tanya Harding''s------ Camp Wackaneenee 7. Kenneth Star''s------- Camp Catchacrookee 6. Louis Farakahn''s----- Camp Killawhitey 5. O.J. Simpson''s------- Camp Killachickee 4. Michael Jackson''s---- Camp Wannabewhitey 3. President Clinton''s-----Camp Getahoochie 2. Ellen Degeneras''s-------Camp Lickacoochie And the number one camp not to send your kid to: 1. Monica Lewinsky''s---- Camp Suckapeepee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Why are you knocking? I''ve got a doorbell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two best friends were staying at a hotel.Their room was on the tenth floor. One day, because the lift was under repair, they started climbing the stairs. On reaching the first floor, one friend remembered something and said - First Friend : Hey listen! I want to tell you something. Second Friend : Go on, speak. First friend : No, no, you may get angry. I''ll tell you later. This conversation happened whenever they reached a floor. Finally,when they reached in front of their room - First Friend : Hey listen! I want to tell you something. Second Friend (irritated) : Please speak then. First Friend : Friend,we forgot to collect the keys from the desk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man knocked at the doctor''s door. When the door opened - Doctor : What is the matter? The man : Doctor,a dog bit my leg. Doctor : Don''t you know that I don''t see patients after 9 pm? The man : I know that very well.Perhaps the dog was not aware of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a mad scientist who worked by himself in his laboratory. He was so lonely that one day, he decided to clone himself. Everything worked perfectly, except that the clone had a very foul mouth. The scientist worked with the clone, but alas, he could not make the clone clean up his language. He got so tired of the clone''s language that one day he pushed him off the end of a cliff. A policeman rushed up to him, and yelled "You are under arrest!" "What for?" the mad scientist asked. And the policeman answered: For making an obscene clone fall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Harvard English 101 class was asked to write a CONCISE essay containing four elements: religion, royalty, sex and mystery. The only "A+" in the class read: "My God," said the Queen, "I''m pregnant. I wonder who did it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a new study out about women and how they feel about their ass. I thought the results were pretty interesting: 85% of women think their ass is too big... 10% of women think their ass is too little... The other 5% say that they don''t care -- they love him and would have married him anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two neighbors had been fighting each other for nigh on four decades. Bob buys a Great Dane and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill''s yard. For one whole year Bill ignores the dog. So Bob then buys a cow and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill''s yard. After about a year and a half of Bob''s cow crapping in Bill''s yard; being ignored all the while, a semi pulls up in front of Bill''s house. Bob runs over and demands to know what''s in the 18-wheeler. ''My new pet elephant,'' Bill replies solemnly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cash, check or charge? I asked after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I notice a remote control for a television set in her purse. "Do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. "No," she replied. "But my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the worst thing I could do to him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Somewhere in the deep South, Bubba called an attorney and asked, "Is it true they''re suing the cigarette companies for causing people to get cancer?" "Yes, Bubba, that is true." "And people are suing the fast food restaurants for making them fat and clogging their arteries with all them burgers and fries ... is that true, mister lawyer?" "Sure is Bubba, but why do you ask?" "Cause I was thinkin'' .... maybe I can sue Budweiser for all them ugly women I''ve been wakin'' up with!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JACK AND JILL Went up the hill To have a little fun. Stupid Jill Forgot the pill And now they have a son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB Her father shot it dead Now it goes to school with her Between two hunks of bread.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall All the king''s horses and all the king''s men Had scrambled eggs for breakfast again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE, the cat did a piddle, all over the bedside clock, The little dog laughed to see such fun then died of electric shock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie Kissed the girls and made them cry. When the boys came out to play He kissed them as well, he''s funny that way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THERE WAS A LITTLE GIRL, who had a little curl Right in the middle of her forehead... And when she was good, she was very very good, But when she was bad she got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo and a sports car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy returning home from his first day at school said to his mother, "Mom, what''s sex?" His mother, who believed in all the most modern educational theories, gave him a detailed explanation, covering all aspects of the tricky subject. When she had finished, the little lad produced an enrollment form which he had brought home from school and said, "Yes, but how am I going to get all that into this one little square?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At school, a boy was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth". The boy decides to go home and try it out. He goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him a $50 note and says, "Just don''t tell your father." Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father also promptly hands him a $50 note and says, "Please don''t say a word to your mother." Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What is the best way to get rid of Irish people? Answer: Throw a dollar off of a bridge! Question: What is the best way to get rid of more Irish people? Answer: Say that no one found the dollar yet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These two eggs had just been married and were on their honeymoon. While they were sitting on the bed making out, the female egg pushed the male egg away and said, "I just have to go to the bathroom. I''ll be back in a minute." and off she went. Five minutes later, the male egg saw his sexy wife walk out in a slinky negligee, wiping her hands up and down her smooth, oval-shaped body. Instantly, the male egg slapped his hands on the top of his head, covering it completely. The female egg looked at him and asked what he was doing. He replied, "The last time I was this hard, someone cracked me on the head with a spoon!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Taxiing down the tarmac, the 757 abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate. After an hour-long wait, it finally took off. A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, "What was the problem?" "The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine," explained the flight attendant, "and it took us a while to find a new pilot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Flight 2341, for noise abatement, turn right 45 degrees. "But Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?" "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A small boy was lost at a large shopping mall. He approached a uniformed policeman and said, "I''ve lost my grandpa!" The cop asked, "What''s he like?" The little boy replied, "Jack Daniels and women with big tits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At one time in my life, I thought I had a handle on the meaning of the word "service". The act of doing things for other people. Then I heard the terms: Internal Revenue Service, Postal Service, Civil Service, Telephone Service, Service Stations, Customer Service, City/County Public Service. And I became confused about the word "service". This is not what I thought "service" meant. Then one day, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them mentioned that he was having a bull service a few of his cows. SHAZAM! It all came into perspective. Now I understand what all those "service" agencies are doing to us...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job. 2. It is important that a man makes you laugh. 3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn''t lie to you. 4. It is important that a man is good in bed and loves making love to you. 5. It is important that these four men don''t know each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We''ve just been notified by Security that there have been six suspected terrorists working out of your office. Five of the six have been apprehended. Bin Sleepin, Bin Loafin, Bin Goofin, Bin Lunchin and Bin Drinkin have been taken into custody. Our agent advised us that they could find no one fitting the description of the sixth cell member, Bin Workin, at your office. Security is confident that anyone who looks like he''s Bin Workin will be very easy to spot. You are obviously not a suspect at this time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads: --------------------------------------- | Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 | | Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 | | Hand Job: $10.00 | --------------------------------------- Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men. "Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile, "can I help you?" "I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?" "Yes," she purrs, "I am." The man replies "Well wash your hands, I want a cheese sandwich!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never accept a drink from a urologist, nor a friendly handshake from a proctologist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes you are the dog. Sometimes you are the hydrant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be a good housekeeper. When you leave him ... get a good lawyer ...keep his house', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. - Douglas Adams. "I''m astounded by people who want to `know'' the universe when it''s hard enough to find your way around Chinatown." - Woody Allen. "Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together...." - Carl Zwanzig. "Computer programming is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning." - Rich Cook. "The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us." - Bill Watterson (Calvin and Hobbes).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A business man was driving along when he spotted a hippie thumbing for a ride. He stopped to pick him up. The hippie sat in the front of the car, bopping and snapping his fingers to some beat in his head. The business man approached a stop sign and couldn''t see clearly to his right, so he asked the hippie if there was anything coming from the right. "Just a dog, man..just a dog" So the business man pulled out and CRASH!! A few days later the business man woke up in a hospital with his arms and legs hung in traction. He looked over and saw the hippie in the bed next to him, his arms and legs also suspended in traction - still bopping and snapping his fingers to some beat in his head. The business man asked, "Hey, I thought you said there was just a dog coming from the right!?" Said the hippie, still snapping his fingers in rhythm, "Yeah man, like Greyhound! man..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady picked up several items at a discount store. When she finally got up to the checker, she learned that one of her items had no price tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got on the intercom and boomed out for all the store to hear, "PRICE CHECK ON LANE THIRTEEN, TAMPAX SUPER SIZE." That was bad enough, but somebody at the rear of the store apparently misunderstood the word "Tampax" for "THUMBTACKS." In a business-like tone, a voice boomed back over the intercom. "DO YOU WANT THE KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH YOUR THUMB OR THE KIND YOU POUND IN WITH A HAMMER?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her, after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now", she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said, in a voice just as threatening, "If you don''t let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy''s pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me were screams of laughter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I''m just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has not let me forget.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women''s type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men''s balls."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for two days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don''t get any....a true story... We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn''t, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where''s that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can''t dear," she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy''s room." A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice, "The big sissy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three-year-old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, "Mommy, you are getting fat!" I replied, "Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy." "I know," she replied, "but what''s growing in your butt?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two kinds of pedestrians -- the quick and the dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is sexually transmitted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:How many Men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 3! 1 to actually screw in the lightbulb, the other 2 need to be there so he can brag about the screwing part!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Get the last word in: Apologize.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people are like Slinkies...not really good for anything, but you still can''t help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found inner peace........ The article read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you''ve started." So I looked around the house to see all the things I started and hadn''t finished....and before leaving the house this morning I finished off bottle of red wine, a bottle of white, the Bailey''s, Kahlua and Wild Turkey, the Prozac, some valium, some cheesecake and a box of chocolates. You have no idea how freakin good I feel....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The hypothalamus is one of the most important parts of the brain, involved in many kinds of motivation, among other functions. The hypothalamus controls the "Four F''s": fighting, fleeing, feeding, and mating. -Heard in a neuropsychology classroom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn''t it?" "No," the second man replied, "it''s Thursday." And the third man chimed in, "So am I. Let''s have a beer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('80-year old Bessie bursts into the rec room at the retirement home. She holds her clenched fist in the air and announces, "Anyone who can guess what is in my hand can have sex with me tonight!!" An elderly gentleman in the rear shouts out, "An elephant?" Bessie thinks a minute and says, "Close enough."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary''s got this huge book, it''s a memoir of her life and times at the White House. In the book she says when Bill told her he was having an affair, she said ''I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for air.'' No, I''m sorry, that''s what Monica said. - David Letterman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Hillary Clinton''s new book ''Living History,'' Hillary details what it was like meeting Bill Clinton, falling in love with him, getting married, and living a passionate, wonderful life as husband and wife. Then on page two, the trouble starts. - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton has finished her memoirs for publication next year, while Bill has barely finished the first chapter. Well, in all fairness, Fiction is a lot harder to write. - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state of New York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family Bible. You know, the one with only seven commandments. - David Letterman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she''s strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it. - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Father O''Malley rose from his bed. It was a fine spring day in his new Washington DC parish. He walked to the window of his bedroom to get a deep breath of the beautiful day outside. He then noticed there was a jackass lying dead in the middle of his front lawn. He promptly called the US Senate for assistance. The conversation went like this: "Good morning, this is Senator Trent Lott. How might I help you?" "And the best of the day te yerself. This is Father O''Malley at St.Brigid''s. There''s a jackass lying dead in me front lawn. Would ye be so kind as to send a couple o'' yer lads to take care of the matter?" Senator Lott, considering himself to be quite a wit, replied with a smirk, "Well now, Father, it was always my impression that you people took care of last rites!" There was dead silence on the line for a long moment. Father O''Malley then replied: "Aye, that''s certainly true, but we are also obliged to notify the next of kin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall where a flower show was in progress One leaned over and said, "Life is so boring, we never have any fun anymore. For $5.00, I''d take my clothes off and streak through that stupid flower show!" "You''re on!" said the other old lady, holding up a $5.00 bill. As fast as she could, the first little old lady fumbled her way out of her clothes and, completely naked, streaked through the front door of the flower show. Waiting outside, her friend heard a huge commotion inside the hall, following by loud applause. The naked lady burst out through the door surrounded by a cheering crowd. "How did you do?" asked her waiting friend. "Great! I just won first prize as Best Dried Arrangement!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours and gets a horrible sunburn. He goes to the hospital and is promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second degree burns. He was already starting to blister and in agony. The doctor prescribed continuous intravenous feeding with saline and electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours. The nurse, rather astounded, said, "What good will Viagra do him?" The doctor replied, "It''ll keep the sheets off his legs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Six retired Floridians were playing poker in the condo clubhouse when Meyerwitz loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five continue playing standing up. Finkelstein looks around and asks, "So, who''s gonna tell the wife?" They draw straws. Goldberg picks the short one. They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, don''t make a bad situation any worse. "Discreet? I''m the most discreet man you''ll ever meet. Discretion is my middle name. Leave it to me." Goldberg goes over to the Meyerwitz apartment and knocks on the door. The wife answers and asks what he wants. Goldberg declares, "Your husband just lost $500 and is afraid to come home." The wife says, "Tell him to drop dead!" "I''ll go tell him," says Goldberg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man suffered a serious heart attack and had open heart bypass surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at a Catholic hospital. As he was recovering, a nun asked him questions regarding how he was going to pay for his medical services. He was asked if he had health insurance. He replied in a raspy voice, "No health insurance." The nun asked if he had money in the bank. He replied, "No money in the bank." The nun asked, "Do you have a relative who could help you?" He said, "I only have a spinster sister who is a nun." The nun got a little perturbed and announced loudly, "Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God." The patient replied, "Then send the bill to my brother-in-law."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary, we hear you coming." 2.Outside a hotel: "Help! We need inn-experienced people." 3.On a desk in a reception room: "We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left." 4.In a veterinarian''s waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes, Sit! Stay!" 5.At the electric company: "We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don''t you will be." 6.On the door of a computer store: "Out for a quick byte." 7.In a restaurant window: "Don''t stand there and be hungry, come on in and get fed up." 8.Inside a bowling alley: "Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop." 9.In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully, we''ll wait." 10.In a counselor''s office: "Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blond crash her helicopter? A: Because she was cold and decided to turn off the ceiling fan!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow -- even during a hurricane! -- here is a valuable tip: Your life is in trouble.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play, it is always possible to get worse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golf is a hard game to figure. One day you''ll go out and slice it and shank it, hit it onto all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out, and for no reason at all, you really stink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I play in the low 80''s. If it is hotter than that, I won''t play.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously, it won''t work -- and both are expensive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In golf, some people tend to get confused with all the numbers. They shoot a six, yell fore, and write five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A not necessarily well-prepared college student sat in his life science classroom, staring at a question on the final exam paper. The question directed "Give four advantages of breast milk." What to write?" He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best: 1. No need to boil. 2. Never goes sour. 3. Available whenever necessary. So far so good - maybe. But the exam demanded a fourth answer. Again, what to write? Once more, he sighed. He frowned. He scowled, then sighed again. Suddenly, he brightened. He grabbed his pen, and triumphantly scribbled his definitive answer. 4. Available in attractive containers of varying sizes. He received an A.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sarah''s grandson is playing in the water, while she is standing on the beach not wanting to get her feet wet, when all of a sudden a huge wave appears from nowhere and crashes directly over the spot where the boy is in the ocean. The water recedes and the boy is no longer there. He simply vanished. Sarah holds her hands to the sky and cries, "God, how could you? Have I not been a wonderful mother and grandmother? Have I not given to B''nai Brith and Haddasah? Have I not tried my very best to live a life that you would be proud of?" Just then, another huge wave appears out of nowhere and crashes on the beach. As the water recedes, the boy is standing there, smiling, splashing around as if nothing had happened. A loud voice booms from the sky, "I have returned your grandson. Are you satisfied?" Sarah responded, "Well ... He WAS wearing a hat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lena called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does it take to fly from Minneapolis to Fargo?" "Just a minute," said the busy clerk. "Vell, said Lena, "if it has to go dat fast, I tink I''ll just take da bus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged non-support. He said to Ole, "I have decided to give your wife $400 a month for support." "Vell, dat''s fine, Judge," said Ole. "And vunce in a while I''ll try to chip in a few bucks, myself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole is so cheap that after his airplane landed safely he grumbled, "Vell, dere gose five dollars down da drain for dat flight insurance!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had a very smart dog. He tried selling it for around $45, but everybody thought it was too expensive. The man couldn''t lower the price because part of the deal was to buy it a new name tag, 5 lbs. of food, and a new toy. After long thought he decided to get rid of the dog. He drove 20 miles out of town and dropped the dog off. When he arrived home, the dog was on the porch. He was baffled by this, so he went out of town 80 miles the next day and dropped his dog off in the woods. He went home only to find his dog on the porch. Next day he was mad, so he drove 170 miles out of town taking the most complicated way possible and dropped his dog off. He started driving around trying to find his way home, but he couldn''t. He called his wife on his cell phone and asked, "Honey, is the dog home?" His wife responded, "Yes, why?" The man said, "Put him on the phone - I need directions."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is black and white and red all over? An embarrassed zebra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole and Lena got married. On their honeymoon trip they were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand and on Lena''s knee. Giggling, Lena said, "Ole, you can go a little farther now if ya vant to." So Ole drove to Duluth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole died. So Lena went to the local paper to put a notice in the obituaries. The gentleman at the counter, after offering his condolences, asked Lena what she would like to say about Ole. Lena replied, "You just put ''Ole died.'' " The gentleman, somewhat perplexed, said, "That''s it? Just ''Ole died?'' Surely, there must be something more you''d like to say about Ole. If it''s money you''re concerned about, the first five words are free. We must say something more." So Lena pondered for a few minutes! and finally said, "O.K. You put ''Ole died. Boat for sale.'' "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole and Lars were on their very first train ride. They had brought along bananas for lunch. Just as they began to peel them, the train entered a long, dark tunnel. "Have you eaten your banana yet?" Ole asked excitedly "No," replied Lars. "Vell, don''t touch it den," Ole exclaimed. "I yust took vun bite and vent blind!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole bought Lena a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, Lars inquired how she was doing with it. "Oh," said Ole, "I persuaded her to svitch to a clarinet." "How come?" asked Lars "Vell," Ole answered, "because vith a clarinet she can''t sing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole and Lena went to the Olympics. While sitting on a bench a lady turned to Ole and said, "Are you a pole vaulter?" Ole said, "No, I''m Norvegian...and my name isn''t Valter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch. One lady turns and asks, "Do you still get frisky?" The other replies, "Oh, sure I do." The first woman asks, "What do you do about it?" The second old lady replies, "I suck a lifesaver." After a few moments, the first old lady asks, "Who drives you to the beach?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Do you know why doctors slap babies on the butt after they are born? A: It knocks the penises off of the dumb ones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people say that I''m superficial, but that''s just on the surface.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can''t even get into my own pants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you''re in bed with a relative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "Implants?" She hit me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t do drugs. I get the same effect just standing up fast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign in a Chinese Pet Store: "Buy one dog, get one flea..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I live in my own little world. But it''s OK. They know me here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t approve of political jokes. I''ve seen too many of them get elected.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and shithead''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love being married. It''s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I''ve stayed alive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Isn''t having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that most nudists are people you don''t want to see naked?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom''s wise words: "Don''t pick that up, you don''t know where it''s been!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today is International Day of The Very Good Looking, Beautiful and Damn Attractive People, so send this message to someone you think fits this description. Please do not send it back to me as I have already received over one thousand messages and my inbox is jammed full.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not only am I redundant and superfluous, but I also tend to use more words than necessary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is full of uncertainties...or could I be wrong about that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of weeks ago the clouds over western Washington were moving to the west. Normally they head east, inland over the mountains to central Washington and beyond. Scientists blamed the switch on mad cloud disease.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn...that was fun!"??', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery. A pessimist''s blood type is always b-negative. Practice safe eating - always use condiments. A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother. Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death. I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded. If electricity comes from electrons... does that mean that morality comes from morons? Marriage is the mourning after the knot before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hangover is the wrath of grapes. Corduroy pillows are making headlines. Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome? Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play. Banning the bra was a big flop. Sea captains don''t like crew cuts. Does the name Pavlov ring a bell? A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor. Without geometry, life is pointless. When you dream in color, it''s a pigment of your imagination. Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion. Reading whilst sunbathing makes you well-red. When two egotists meet, it''s an I for an I. Alarms: What an octopus is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Crick: The sound that a Japanese camera makes. Dockyard: A physician''s garden. Incongruous: Where bills are passed. Khakis: What you need to start the car in Boston. Oboe: An English tramp. Pasteurize: Too far to see. Propaganda: A gentlemanly goose. Toboggan: Why we go to an auction', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar. He sees a good looking, smartly dressed woman perched on a bar stool. He walks up behind her and says, "Hi there, good looking, how''s it going?" Having already had a few power drinks, she turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says, ''Listen! I''ll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place, front door, back door, it doesn''t matter. I''ve been doing it ever since I got out of college. I just flat ass love it." Eyes now wide with interest he says, "No kidding, I''m a lawyer too! What firm are you with?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesse Jackson, Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It''s called "Ministers Do More Than Lay People."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are only eleven times in history where the "F" word has been considered acceptable for use. They are as follows: 11. "What the fuck do you mean we are sinking?" Capt. E.J. Smith of RMS Titanic, 1912 10. "What the fuck was that?" Mayor Of Hiroshima, 1945 9. "Where did all those fucking Indians come from?" Custer, 1877 8 "Any fucking idiot could understand that." Einstein, 1938 7. "It does so fucking look like her!" Picasso, 1926 6. "How the fuck did you work that out?" Pythagoras, 126 BC 5. "You want WHAT on the fucking ceiling?" Michelangelo, 1566 4. "Where the fuck are we?" Amelia Earhart, 1937 3. "Scattered fucking showers, my ass!" Noah, 4314 BC 2. "Aw c''mon. Who the fuck is going to find out?" Bill Clinton, 1999 and a drum roll............!!!! 1. "Geez, I didn''t think they''d get this fucking mad." Sadaam Hussein, 2003', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bicycle can''t stand alone because it is two tired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the definition of a will? (It''s a dead giveaway).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A backward poet writes inverse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you don''t pay your exorcist you get repossessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not to worry: the man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The difference between the Pope and your boss.... The Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it is gone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you''re in the bathroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course there''s shipping and handling, too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My next house will have no kitchen -- just vending machines and a large trash can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette said, "I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off. I was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn signal fluid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so depressed. My doctor refused to write me a prescription for Viagra. He said it would be like putting a new flagpole on a condemned building.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the drink spilled and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who had been shipwrecked on a desert island for several years is starting to feel the effects of being starved of sex for so long. However, the only living creatures on the island are a dog and a pig. One day, the man decides he''s had enough and thinks to himself that it has to be the pig. But every time he approaches the sow for his moment of passion the dog bites the man''s backside. This continues for several days and the man is beginning to get frustrated. But one morning, the man''s luck changes: out to sea he notices a beautiful young woman on the point of drowning. He swims over, drags her out on to the beach and gives her the kiss of life. The woman comes to and is very grateful. "Thank you so much," she says. "I will do anything for you, and I mean absolutely anything." The man can''t believe his luck and quickly replies, "You wouldn''t mind taking that bloody dog for a walk would you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk goes to the doctor complaining of tiredness and headaches. ''I feel tired all the time,'' he slurs, ''My head hurts, I''ve got a sore bum, and I''m not sleeping. What is it doc?'' Frowning the doctor examines him thoroughly before standing back. ''I can''t find anything wrong,'' he says.''It must be the drinking.'' ''Fair enough,'' replies the drunk.''I''ll come back when you''re sober.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbor was bit by a stray rabid dog. I went to see how he was and found him writing frantically on a piece of paper. I told him rabies could be cured and he didn''t have to worry about a will. He said, "Will? What will? I''m making a list of the people I want to bite."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Definition of a teenager? God''s punishment for enjoying sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As we slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Progress in airline flying; Now a flight attendant can get a pilot pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I remember when sex was safe and flying was dangerous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The three best things in life are a good landing, a good orgasm, and a good bowel movement. The night carrier landing is one of the few opportunities in life where you get to experience all three at the same time. (Author unknown, but someone who''s been there)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; if ATC screws up, the pilot dies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over, the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying, "A dollar per point." The next class the professor handed the tests back out. This student got back his test and $56 change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I''m wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can''t read, I can''t write - and they won''t let me talk!" -------------------- On the way home from the first day of school, the father asked his son, "What did you do at school today?" The little boy shrugged his shoulders and said, "Nothing". Hoping to draw his son into conversation, the father persisted and said, "Well, did you learn about any numbers, study certain letters, or maybe a particular color?" The perplexed child looked at his father and said, "Daddy, didn''t you go to school when you were a little boy?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. The neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged at this that she came over and shouted at me, "You should be hung." I took a drink from my can of Budweiser, wiped the cold foam from my lips, lifted my darkened Ray ban Sunglasses and stared directly at this nosey neighbor and then calmly replied, "I am, that''s why she cuts the grass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man, let''s call him Gregory. Gregory was carrying a small box, and he went to another man''s house (we''ll call him Jebediah) and knocked on the door. When Jebediah answered, Gregory said "I have a proposition for you. Take this box. There is a button inside. If you press the button before I return, someone that you don''t know will die. Tomorrow, I will return. If you have pressed the button, I will give you $20,000." Gregory left the box with Jebediah. Jebediah had to consider what he was going to do. Eventually he decided that he didn''t care about the person, and he pressed the button. The next day, Gregory returned to take back the box. "Well then, I belive that this is yours," he said, giving $20,000 to Jebediah. "Thank you," Jebediah said. "By the way, I''m just curious: What are you going to do with the box now?" "I''m going to give it to someone that doesn''t know you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old farmer in Georgia had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, basketball court, etc. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn''t been there for a while, and look it over. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end of the pond. One of the women shouted to him, "We''re not coming out until you leave!" The old man replied, "I didn''t come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked." "I''m here to feed the alligator." Moral: Old age and cunning will triumph over youth and enthusiasm every time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You certainly look cool. "Thanks, you don''t look so hot yourself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never hold your farts in. They travel up your spine, into your brain, and that''s where you get shitty ideas from.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl''s legs are her best friends, but the best of friends must part. -- Redd Foxx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Pakistani guy named Abdul was ringing in flour at his grocery store, and the bag broke, covering him with flour. Abdul rushes home to take a shower. He enters his house and his wife says to him, "Abdul, you''re white, what happened to you?" Abdul says "I was ringing in flour, the bag broke, I go take shower." He runs upstairs and he runs into his son. His son says "Daddy, you''re a white man, what happened?" Abdul said "I was ringing in flour, the bag broke, I go take shower." He proceeds towards the bathroom when he is stopped by his daughter. His daughter said "Daddy, you''re all white, what happened?" He screams "I''ve only been white for half an hour, and already I hate you damn pakies!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny was walking down the street pulling his wagon when he stubbed his toe. He was swearing like crazy when a priest comes up to him and says "Johnny, I wouldn''t say such things, God is everywhere." Intrigued by the priest''s comment, he questions the priest. "Is God over there?" he says pointing to a tree. "Yes Johnny, God is over there by that tree!" says the priest. "Is god right here?" Johnny said pointing right beside him. "Yes Johnny God is right beside you." says the priest. "Is God in my red wagon?" asks Johnny. "Yes Johnny, God is in your red wagon." says the priest. "Is god in my basement?" asks Johnny. "Yes Johnny, God is in your basement." says the priest. Johnny screams "You''re a liar, I don''t have a basement!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My karma ran over my dogma. -Anonymous', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion? A piece of ass that brings tears to your eyes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bin Laden is sitting with his son and they are watching the Twin Towers collapse. His son asks him, "Dad, which film is this?" to which he replied, "Son, this isn''t a film, this is a series."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a blonde keep lowering her head in the supermarket? She is looking for low prices.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde have on her when she is naked? A working uniform.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How would you drown a blond? Put a mirror at the bottom of the swimming pool', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a blond turn the light on after sex? ANSWER: She opens the car door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does the blond take off the doors from the bathroom when she is having a wash? ANSWER: So no one would look through the keyhole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it good to have a blond in your car? ANSWER: You can park on places for disabled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a blonde and an ironing board? It''s easier to open the legs on the blonde.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blond say when she is watching a porn movie? ANSWER: "Look, me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Driving to Louisana on the interstate, I looked over to my left and there was a woman in a brand new Cadillac doing 65 mph with her face up next to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner. I looked away for a couple seconds and when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane, still working on that makeup. As a man, I don''t scare easily. But she scared me so much; I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the donut out of my other hand. In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my cell phone away from my ear which fell into the coffee between my legs, splashed, and burned Big Jim and the Twins, ruined the damn phone, soaked my trousers, and disconnected an important call. Darn women drivers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I''d like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic. If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire. "If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port wing has fallen off. "If you look down towards the Atlantic ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you. "That''s me your captain, the co-pilot, and one of the air stewardesses. This is a recorded message. Have a good flight!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a blond stand next to a mirror with her hands on her eyes? She wants to see how she looks like when she is sleeping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a tortoise? A: The blond is better on her back than the tortoise.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is passing a blonde and he says, "Where are those legs going?" and the blonde answers, "They are going home for now unless something comes between them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 blondes caught a goldfish, and the fish said if they let her go she will grant them one wish each. The first blonde said: "I want to be smart." The second said: "I want to be smarter than her," and the third said: "I want to be the smartest." In the morning they woke up and the first blonde turned into a brunette, second black and the third one had become a man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the blonde that started writing a diary of all her thoughts? Yes, after 3 years she is on the second page now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady walks into a drug store and tells the pharmacist she needs some cyanide. The pharmacist said, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady explained she needed it to poison her husband. The pharmacist''s eyes got big and he said, "Lord have mercy, I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! They''ll throw both of us in jail and I''ll lose my license." Then the lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife and handed it to the pharmacist. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now, you didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('James came to school late. TEACHER: James, why are you late? JAMES: I had to take the cow to the bull to mate. TEACHER: Couldn''t your father do that? JAMES: No, I think it''s better for the bull to do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The journey of a thousand miles ... begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex is like air. It''s not important... unless you aren''t getting any.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never test the depth of the water with both feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again... It was probably worth it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy Joe Bob, while not a brilliant scholar, was a gifted portrait artist. His fame grew and soon people from all over the country were coming to him for paintings. One day, a beautiful young woman pulled up to his house in a stretch limo. She asked Billy Joe Bob if he would paint her in the nude. This was the first time anyone had made this request. The beautiful lady said money was no object; she was willing to pay $50,000. Not wanting to get into trouble with his wife, Billy Joe Bob asked the lady to wait while he went in the house and conferred with his wife. In a few minutes, he returned and told the lady he was willing to do it. However, he would have to leave his socks on so he would have some place to wipe his brushes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some days you are the bug. Some days you are the windshield.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t worry; it only seems kinky the first time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Generally speaking, you aren''t learning much when your lips are moving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our ass... then things get worse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone seems normal until you get to know them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four girls were playing a game of tag. All of them had really long names that were hard to say, so one person thought of the idea of giving themselves nicknames. One suggested thinking of funny names, so the really tall girl was named ''Shorty''. The really thin girl was named ''fatty''. The next girl was very ''girlish'', so they named her ''tomboy''. The last girl was the hardest to pick a name for, because she was not tall or short, fat or thin, a girly girl or a tomboy. Finally it came to them. Now there is Shorty, Fatty, Tomboy, and Smarty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Roses are yellow; Grandfather''s teeth Are lost in the Jello.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You don''t have any luck at all if: -The guarantee on your used car expires two hours before the car''s engine does. - You start to go bald at the same time you reach puberty. -You get your BIG break and make the football team only to trip over the bench and break your leg. -You find a ten-dollar bill and get arrested when you try to spend it because it''s counterfeit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waitress: "Would you like your coffee black?" Customer: "What other colors do you have?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tex: "My uncle can shoot a gun faster than any other man in the West. He can even shoot without removing the gun from his Holster." Rex: "What do they call your uncle?" Tex: "Toeless Joe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sheriff of a small western town was also the town veterinarian. Late one night the phone rang, and his wife answered it. "Is your husband there?" asked an agitated voice. "Do you require my husband''s services as a sheriff or as a veterinarian?" She asked. "Both," came the reply. "We can''t get our dog''s mouth open, and there''s a burglar in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam: "Where have I seen your face before?" Pam: "Right where it is now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: "Stop worrying so much. Forget your troubles. Throw yourself into your work." Patient: "But, Doc, I mix paint for a living!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As I was packing for my business trip, my 3-year old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point, she said, "Daddy, look at this," and stuck out two of her fingers. Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingers in my mouth and said, "Daddy''s gonna eat your fingers!" pretending to eat them before I rushed out of the room again. When I returned, my daughter was standing on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face. I said, "What''s wrong, honey?" She replied, "What happened to my booger?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a man Love, To forgive him and Patience, For his moods Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength I''ll just beat him to death', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A small boy stunned his parents after Sunday School when he began to empty his pockets of nickels, dimes and quarters. Finally his mother asked the obvious question, "Where did you get all that money?" "At church," the boy replied nonchalantly. "They have bowls of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel so miserable without you, it''s almost like having you here. -Stephen Bishop "I''ve just learned about his illness. Let''s hope it''s nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway) "He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others." -Samuel Johnson "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr "I''ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn''t it." -Groucho Marx "I didn''t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go." -Oscar Wilde "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -Oscar Wilde "He has Van Gogh''s ear for music." - Billy Wilder', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you keep reading the Bible every day? the teenage girl asked her grandfather. "Well, it''s a bit like cramming for your final exam," said Granddad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. There''s potpourri hanging from his/her collar. 9. The dog''s nails have been cut with pinking shears. 8. The dog toys are all stored in McCoy crocks. 7. The pooper scooper has been decorated with raffia bows. 6. That telltale lemon slice in the new silver water bowl. 5. You find liver and whole wheat dog treats stamped out with copper cookie cutters and decorated with royal icing using a #2 rosette tip. 4. Dog hair has been collected and put into wire baskets for nesting material for the birds. 3. A seasonally appropriate grapevine wreath adorns the front of your dog''s crate. 2. Your dog goes outside naked and comes in wearing a thyme colored virgin wool hand-knitted sweater with matching boots. 1. The dog droppings in your backyard have been sculpted into swans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The owner of a golf course in Knoxville, Tennessee was confused about paying an invoice minus his early payment discount, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the University of Tennessee and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" The secretary thought a moment, then replied, "Everything but my earrings."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl was visiting her blonde friend who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend asked, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?" "HellOOOooo," answered the blonde. "They''re watch dogs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00. With Enron, you would have $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00. With WorldCom, you would have less than $5.00 left. But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of Beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling price, you would have $214.00. Based on the above, current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle. It''s called the 401-Keg Plan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-During a thunderstorm, you build a giant boat and start stealing your neighbor''s pets. -When the boss criticizes your work, you hack off your right ear and mail it to him. -Not only do you consider Yoko an artistic genius, you think she''s beautiful and h', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lorena Bobbitt''s sister Louella was arrested yesterday for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago. Sources reveal the sister was not as accurate as Lorena. She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper thigh causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to be in serious, but stable condition and Louella has been charged with a.... Misdewiener', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Hindu swamis were in conversation. One said to the other, "How did you like my latest book, ''The Art of Levitation''?" His companion replied, "It kept me up all night."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Hindu devotee asked God, represented by the multi-armed Lord Narayana, this question. "My dear Lord," he said. "I understand that you have innumerable inconceivable potencies, but out of all of them the energy of light seems to be the most amazing. Light pervades the spiritual world, it illuminates the material universes, and life is impossible without it." He continued, "I would like to know how you make it work." "Oh, that''s easy," was the reply. "Many hands make light work."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Carol''s husband, Arnie, was a male chauvinist. Even though they both worked full-time, he never helped around the house. Housework was a woman''s work! One evening Carol arrived home from work to find the children bathed, one load of clothes in the washer and another in the dryer, dinner on the stove, and the table set. She was astonished. It turns out that Arnie had read an article that said wives who worked full-time and had to do their own housework were too tired to have sex. The night went well and the next day she told her office friends all about it. "We had a great dinner. Arnie even cleaned up. He helped the kids do their homework, folded all the laundry and put everything away. I really enjoyed the evening." "But what about afterward?" asked her friends. "Oh, that was perfect too. Arnie was too tired!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reporters interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply replied, "No peer pressure."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve sure gotten old. I''ve had 2 By-pass surgeries. A hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate cancer, and diabetes. I''m half blind, can''t hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation, hardly feel my hands and feet anymore Can''t remember if I''m 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But...Thank God, I still have my Florida driver''s license!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 97 year old man goes into his doctor''s office and says, "Doc, I want my sex drive lowered." "Sir", replied the doctor, "You''re 97. Don''t you think your sex drive is all in your head?" "You''re damned right it is!" replied the old man. "That''s why I want it lowered!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman from Brooklyn decided to prepare her will and make her final requests. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Bloomingdales. "Bloomingdales!" the rabbi exclaimed. "Why Bloomingdales?" "Then I''ll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Respect leadership hierarchy wisely A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I''ll give each of you just one." "Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speed boat, without a care in the world." Poof! She''s gone. In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of pina coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He''s gone. "OK, you''re up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch." Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new army recruit was given guard duty at 2 a.m. He did his best for a while, but at about 4 a.m. he went to sleep. He awakened to find the officer of the day standing before him. Remembering the heavy penalty for being asleep on guard duty, this smart young man kept his head bowed for another moment and looked upward and reverently said, "A-a-a-men!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer had been taken several times by a local car dealer. One day, the car dealer informed the farmer that he was coming over to purchase a cow. The farmer priced the unit as follows: Basic Cow $ 999.95 Shipping and Handling 35.75 Extra Stomach 79.25 Two-tone Exterior 142.10 Produce Storage Compartment 128.50 Heavy Duty Straw Chopper 189.60 4-Spigot/High Output Drain System 149.20 Automatic Fly Swatter 88.50 Genuine Cowhide Upholstery 170.80 Deluxe Dual Horns 59.25 Automatic Fertilizer Attachment 339.40 4 X 4 Traction Drive Assembly 884.16 Pre-Delivery Wash and Comb 69.80 Farmer Suggested List Price $ 3336.26 Additional Dealer Adjustment 300.00 Total list price (including options) $ 3636.26 Tax and Ear Tags 418.00 TOTAL PURCHASE PRICE $ 4054.26', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s no use. Art doesn''t listen to me, said a little boy who was praying for a new bike. "Art who?" asked the boy''s mother. "Art in heaven," came the reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy on a date parks and gets the girl in the back seat and they make love. The girl wants it again and the guy obliges her. She wants more and they do it again. She still wants more and the guy says "Excuse me a minute I have to relieve myself." While out of the car he notices a guy a half block away changing a flat. He asks the guy "Look, I''ve got this gal in my car and I''ve given it to her four or five times and she still wants more. I''ll change your flat if you''ll take over for me." The guy does and is just getting in the high numbers when a cop knocks on the window and shines a light on them. The cop asks "What''re you doing in there?" The guy says "I''m making love to my wife." The cop asks "Why don''t you do that at home?" The guy answers "To tell you the truth, I didn''t know it was my wife until you shone the light on her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do babies get their belly buttons? A: When God finishes making little babies, He lines them all up in a row, then he walks along in front of them. He pokes each one in the tummy with His finger and says, "You''re done, you''re done, you''re done, - - -"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, after I took my dog to the vet, I stopped off at the grocery store to pick up some milk. So I left my dog in the car with the window rolled down so she could breathe. Because my dog is small, she could fit through the window of the car, but she is well trained enough to follow my commands. So I told her, "Stay. Stay there, don''t move. Staaay." A man loading his car with groceries next to me said, "You know, usually, I just put it in park!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Practice safe eating ...Always use condiments.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when you hear Vrrrrm.ERT.Vrmmm.Ert? Answer: A Blond at A Blinking Red Light.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard you got a baby. Dad: Yes, and I am very happy. So what about the wife? Dad: She still doesn''t know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beauty is only a light switch away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let''s all get wasted together, and have the time of our lives!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Make love, not war. Hell, do both GET MARRIED!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Woman''s Rule of Thumb: If it has, tires, or testicles, you''re going to have trouble with it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this huge guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says, "7 feet tall, 350 lbs., 20 inch penis, testicles 3 lbs. each, Turner Brown." The small guy just faints dead away and falls to the floor. The big dude kneels down and brings him to, by slapping and shaking him. He asks, "Are you Ok?" In a very weak voice the little guy says, "Excuse me, but what did you just say to me?" The big dude says, "When I saw the curious look on your face, I just figured I''d give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. "I''m 7 feet tall, weigh 350 lbs., have a 20 inch penis, my testicles weigh 3 lbs. each. And my name is Turner Brown." The small guy says, "Thank God!! I thought you said Turn Around".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU''RE DRUNK: Indubitably Innovative Preliminary Proliferation Cinnamon THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU''RE DRUNK: Specificity British Constitution Passive-aggressive disorder Loquacious Tran-substantiate THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU''RE DRUNK: Thanks, but I don''t want to have sex. Nope, no more booze for me. Sorry, but you''re not really my type. Good evening officer isn''t it lovely out tonight. Oh, I just couldn''t. No one wants to hear me sing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This blonde goes into a restaurant and notices there''s a "peel and win" sticker on her coffee cup. So, she peels it off and starts screaming, "I''ve won a motor home! I''ve won a motor home!" The waitress says, "That''s impossible. The biggest prize is a mini-van." But the blonde keeps screaming, "I''ve won a motor home! I''ve won a motor home." Finally, the manager comes over and says, "Ma''am, I''m sorry, but you''re mistaken. You couldn''t possibly have won a motor home, because we didn''t have that as a prize!" The blonde says, "No, it''s not a mistake. I''ve won a motor home!" So, she hands the ticket to the manager and he reads, "WIN A BAGEL".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a non-churchgoer? A: A Seventh-Day Absentist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young clergyman, fresh out of seminary, thought it would help him better understand the fears and temptations his future congregations faced if he first took a job as a policeman for several months. He passed the physical examination; then came the oral exam to test his ability to act quickly and wisely in an emergency. Among other questions he was asked, "What would you do to disperse a frenzied crowd?" He thought for a moment and then said, "I would take up a collection."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy and a girl were in a golf cart and the guy drops his tees out of his pocket and the lady asks what is he doing? So, the guy says: I put my balls on them and I drive them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just in case you''ve had a rough day at work, here''s a technique recommended in all the latest psychological texts. 1. Picture yourself near a stream. 2. Birds are softly chirping in the cool mountain air. 3. No one but you knows your secret place. 4. You are in total seclusion from the hectic place called "the world." 5. The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity. 6. The water is crystal clear. 7. You can easily make out the face of the person you''re holding underwater...your boss...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After many years, a young Jewish Talmud student who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family. "But--where is your beard?" asks his mother upon seeing him. "Mama," he replies, "in America, nobody wears a beard." "But at least you keep the Sabbath?" "Mama, business is business. In America, everybody works on the Sabbath." "But kosher food you still eat?" "Mama, in America, it is very difficult to keep kosher." The old lady ponders this information and then leans over and whispers in his ear, "Isaac, tell me--you''re still circumcised?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other, outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?" The second kid says, "I''m in here to get my tonsils out and I''m a little nervous." The first kid says, "You''ve got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jello and ice cream. It''s a breeze." The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?" The first kid says, "A circumcision." The second kid replies, "Whoa, Good luck buddy, I had that done when I was born. Couldn''t walk for a year!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only thing the Internal Revenue Service has not yet taxed is the penis. This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemployed. 30% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off, and 10% of the time it''s in the hole. It has two dependents, but they''re nuts! Effective January 2004, penises will be taxed according to size. The tax brackets are as follows: 10"-12" LUXURY TAX 8"-10" POLE TAX 5"-8" PRIVILEGE TAX 4"-5" NUISANCE TAX Males exceeding 12 inches must file under capital gains. Anyone under 4 inches is eligible for a refund. PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cheerleaders does it take to screw in a light bulb? They wouldn''t, they might brake a nail!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Milby''s. The passenger, Bubba, said, "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it''s a po-lice roadblock! We''re gonna get busted fer drinkin'' these here beers!!" "Don''t worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We''ll just pull over and finish drinkin'' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat." "What fer?" asked Bubba. "Just let me do the talkin'', OK?" said Earl. Well, they finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat and each put a label on their forehead. When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin''?" "No sir," Earl said. "We''re on the patch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mothers of teens know why animals eat their young.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We child-proofed our home 3 years ago but they''re still getting in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The main purpose of holding children''s parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who eats cereal and plays golf? Tony the Tiger Woods.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it hard for dalmatians to play hide-and-seek? Because they''re always spotted!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you aim a nuclear weapon at a disobedient country? South Korean Barbecue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a holy man that fries potatoes? A chipmonk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is out playing golf one day when he whacks the ball harder then usual. It goes soaring in the air, and the golfer yells, "FORE!" He runs over to find his ball, and he sees a guy holding his head in pain. The man is shouting "I will sue you, and I will win 1 thousand dollars!" The golfer replies "But I yelled ''fore,'' so you can''t sue me." The man replies: "Four, thats better than just one! I''ll take it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doc, I can''t stop singing ''The Green, Green Grass of Home.'' "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" "It''s Not Unusual."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 bucks that he couldn''t reach the meat off the top shelf. "No," he said, "the steaks are too high."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? Sanka.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their car which said: "Two Prostitutes -- $50.00." A policeman, seeing the sign, stopped them and told them they''d either have to remove the sign or go to jail. Just at that time, another car passed with a sign saying: "JESUS SAVES." One of the girls asked the officer, "How come you don''t stop them?!" "Well, that''s a little different," the officer smiled . . . "Their sign pertains to religion." So the two ladies of the night frowned as they took their sign down and drove off. The following day found the same police officer in the area when he noticed the two ladies driving around with a large sign on their car again. Figuring he had an easy arrest, he began to catch up with them when he noticed the new sign which now read: "Two Fallen Angels Seeking Peter -- $50.00."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John: I got this great new hearing aid the other day. Mary: Are you wearing it now? John: Yup. Cost me four thousand dollars, though. But it''s top of the line. Mary: What kind is it? John: Twelve-thirty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid, that you called my house and asked for my number!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jacob, a three year old boy, is excited about the birth of his little sister, Olivia. One morning, Jacob''s mom is giving Olivia a bath, when Jacob asks "Mom, where''s her pp?" The mom explains that boys have pp''s and girls don''t. Just to make sure he understands, she brings out a magazine, and points to a girl and said "What does she have?" and he responds "No pp." She tells him good job and points to a man and he responds "pp." Then she points to George W. Bush and asks "Whats this?" he responds "tough call"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day I asked my grandfather how to ice fish. He said all you need is a can of peas and a club. "Huh?", I said. "How does that work?" "Well," he said, "After you cut the hole in the ice you just place the peas around the edge of the hole! Then you wait by the hole with your club." "What does that do?" I asked. "Well," he said with a grin. "When the fish come up to take a pee, you hit him over the head with the club!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two doctors and an HMO manager died and lined up at the pearly gates for admission to heaven. St. Peter asked them to identify themselves. One doctor stepped forward and said, "I was a pediatric spine surgeon and helped kids overcome their deformities." St. Peter said, "You can enter." The second doctor said, "I was a psychiatrist. I helped people rehabilitate themselves." St. Peter also invited him in. The third applicant stepped forward and said, "I was an HMO manager. I helped people get cost-effective health care." St. Peter said, "You can come in, too." But as the HMO manager walked by, St. Peter added, "You can stay three days. After that, you can go to Hell."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For all of us who miss those great old tunes from the 60s and 70s, there''s good news! Some of our old favorites have re-released their great hits with new lyrics to accommodate maturing audiences. Bobby Darin - "Splish, Splash, I Was Havin'' a Flash" Herman''s Hermits - "Mrs. Brown, You''ve Got a Lovely Walker" The Beatles - "I Get by with a Little Help from Depends" Marvin Gaye - "I Heard It Through the Grape Nuts" The Bee Gees - "How Can You Mend a Broken Hip" The Temptations - "Papa''s Got a Kidney Stone" Nancy Sinatra - "These Boots Aren''t Made for Bunions" Paul Simon - "Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver" Roberta Flack - "The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face" ABBA - "Denture Queen" Leo Sayer - "You Make Me Feel Like Napping" Commodores - "Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom" Johnny Nash - "I Can''t See Clearly Now"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best thing about dating a homeless woman? You can drop her off anywhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should a woman say to a man she''s just had sex with? Whatever she wants. He''s sleeping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Mobile, Alabama to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Redneck says, "I want my $20 million." The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn''t work that way. We give you a million today and then you''ll get the rest spread out for the next 19 years." The Redneck said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explain that he would only get a million that day and the rest during the next 19 years. The Redneck, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you''re not going to give me my $20 million right now, then I want my dollar back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Welcome aboard Southwest Flight 245 to Tampa. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don''t know how to operate one, you probably shouldn''t be out in public unsupervised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a teacher at an elementary school asks one of her students how clouds form. She replied "I''m not sure how clouds form, but the clouds know how to form, and that''s the important thing...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy asked his mother, "Ma, is it true that people can be taken apart like machines?" "Of course not, where did you hear such nonsense?" replied his mother. The young boy answered, "The other day, Daddy was talking to someone on the phone, and he said that he''d like to screw the tail off his secretary."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with B, has 2 E''s, and ends in R???? Birthday Cheer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man jumps out of an airplane with a parachute on his back. As he''s falling, he realizes his chute is broken. He doesn''t know anything about parachutes, but as the earth rapidly approaches, he realizes his options are limited; he takes off the parachute and tries to fix it himself on the way down. The wind is ripping past his face, he''s dropping like a rock, and at 5000 feet, another man goes shooting up past him. In desperation, the man with the chute looks up and yells, "Hey do you know anything about parachutes?!" The guy flying up looks down and yells, "No, do you know anything about gas stoves?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bottle feeding: An opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 am too. Defense: What you''d better have around de yard if you''re going to let the children play outside. Drooling: How teething babies wash their chins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Interchangeable parts aren''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The one item you need is always in short supply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To show the armadillo that it was possible. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from Colonel Sanders! Why did the chicken cross the road twice? Because it was a double-crosser. Why did the Iraqi chicken cross the road? To take over the other side. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide. Why did the chicken cross the beach? To get to the other tide. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Chickens hadn''t evolved yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. When no one else is looking, you swear that the monkeys are mocking you. 2. The bears'' exhibit is nothing more than the guys cut from the football team during training camp. 3. The stripes on the zebra tend to peel away in the heat. 4. The zookeeper always wants to take the rhino for a walk. 5. The lion in the lion cage closely resembles the one from The Lion King. 6. The alligator in the reptiles exhibit is nothing more than the University of Florida''s mascot. 7. If you deposit 50 cents, the giraffe will magically appear and talk to you. 8. Ask the tour guide too many questions and you''re suddenly dipped in some sort of sauce and placed in the tigers'' den. 9. The elephant appear to be two guys in a two part elephant suit. 10. Two words: hippo dogs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. It''s not a laugh to practice barking at 3a.m. 2. It''s wrong to back Grandma into a corner and guard her. 3. He shouldn''t jump on your bed when he''s sopping wet. 4. The cats have every right to be in the living room. 5. Barking at guests 10 minutes after they arrive is stupid 6. Getting up does NOT mean we are going for a walk 7. Just because I''m eating, doesn''t mean you can. 8. If you look at me with those big soppy eyes, I''m not going to give in and feed you. NOT NOT NOT. Oh, ok, just this once. 9. No, it''s my food....Oh alright then, just a small piece.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know this isn''t too funny, but it''s one of those simple ones that put a smile on your face. Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo? A: Holes all over Australia. Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale? A: A submarine with a built-in snorkel. Q: Why did the elephant cross the road? A: Chicken''s day off. Q: Why do elephants have trunks? A: Because they would look silly with glove compartments. Q: Why do elephants drink so much? A: To try to forget. Q: How can you tell if an elephant is getting ready to charge? A: He pulls out his Diners'' Club card. Q: What do you get when two giraffes collide? A: A giraffic jam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sherlock Holmes stood at the Gates of Heaven pulling at his pipe awaiting his turn. "I''ll let you in," said St. Peter, gesturing toward the heavenly throngs behind him, "if you''ll tell me who among these was the first mortal." "Elementary, my dear St. Peter," said the great detective, "he''s the one without a bellybutton."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez. "How was he killed?" asked one detective. "With a golf gun." answered the other detective. "A golf gun?! What is a golf gun?" asked the first detective. "I don''t know, but it sure made a hole in Juan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A faith healer asked Moshe how his family was getting along. "They''re all fine," Moshe said, "Except my uncle. He''s very sick." "Your uncle is not sick," the faith healer said. "He THINKS he''s sick." Two weeks later, the faith healer ran into Moshe on the street. "How is your uncle getting along?" he asked. Moshe shrugged, "He THINKS he''s dead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Jesus was out for a walk, strolling near the walls surrounding heaven, when he heard an old man''s voice call from the other side. "Hello? Hello?" Jesus replied, "Who is it?" "Just a poor, old carpenter searching for his son," the old man replied. Jesus'' heart leapt with joy and he called out, "Joseph?" The voice answered back, "Pinocchio?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Very stinky I can be. And a wet hole is all you see. Give me a rod and I''m happy. In the silence I can queef. No one thinks they''re eating beef. And please oh please don''t use teeth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A silent Order of Monks is allowed to eat only porridge and speak just once a month. One month, Friar Albert stood up and said, "I hate porridge." A month of silence passes by and Friar Barnaby stands to say, "I like porridge." Another silent month goes by when Head Master Geoff rises and says... "Would you two stop this constant bickering!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three ministers are talking over lunch and before long find themselves discussing how much of the weekly offering is appropriate to keep and how much to give to the Lord. The first minister says, "I just draw a line on the floor, put one foot on each side, and throw the money into the air. Whatever lands on the right side of the line is God''s and whatever lands on the left is mine." The second minister notes that he uses a similar method, but "I use a small coffee table when I throw the money in the air and whatever lands on the table goes to the Lord and whatever lands on the floor is mine." They both contemplate each other''s answer and finally turn to the third minister who is sitting there without saying anything. "Well, how do you do it?" asks the first to the third. "Well, I do as you both do and throw the money into the air, but I figure whatever the Lord wants, he''ll grab, and I keep whatever hits the floor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Give Evolution Two Opposable Thumbs Up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#10 - You can trade an old 44 for a new 22. #9 - You can keep one handgun at home and have another for one when you''re on the road. #8 - If you admire a friends handgun and tell him so, he''ll probably let you try it out a few times. #7 - Your primary handgun doesn''t mind if you keep another handgun for backup. #6 - Your handgun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo. #5 - A handgun doesn''t take up a lot of closet space. #4 - Handguns function normally every day of the month. #3 - A handgun doesn''t ask, "Do these new grips make me look fat?" #2 - A handgun doesn''t mind if you go to sleep after you use it. And, the number one reason a handgun is favored over a woman #1 - You can buy a silencer for a handgun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little David was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up -- firefighter, police officer, sales rep, doctor, lawyer, etc. David was being uncharacteristically quiet, so the teacher asked him about his father. "My father''s an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret, and takes off all his clothes in front of other men, and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer''s really good, he''ll go home with some guy and make love with him for money." The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly sent the other children to work on some exercises and took little David aside to ask him, "Is that really true about your father?" "No," said David, "He actually works for the "RE-ELECT BUSH" Organization, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was probably having sex. Worried the girl might become pregnant, and that this would reflect badly on the whole family, she consulted the family doctor. The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He recommended that she arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms. That evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the woman told her about her visit to the doctor and handed her a box of condoms. The girl burst out laughing and reached over to hug her mother, saying: "Oh Mom! You don''t have to worry about that! I''m dating Susan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Reasons Why It''s So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder 1. The DNA is all the same. 2. There are no dental records.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling. "I''m O.K. but I didn''t like the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery," he answered. "What did he say?" asked the nurse. "OOPS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nothing has really changed, even though we think we''ve gotten smarter, and technologically advanced. We''ve just gone back to square one! "Doctor, I have an ear ache." 2000 B.C. - "Here, eat this root." 1000 B.C. - "That root is heathen, say this prayer." 1850 A.D. - "That prayer is superstition, drink this potion." 1940 A.D. - "That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill." 1985 A.D. - "That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic." 2004 A.D. - "That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a sheep that does karate? A: A lamb chop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book? A: They all have phones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Democrats better than Republicans in bed? You''ve never heard of getting a good piece of elephant, have you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Bush/Cheney ''04: We''re Gooder! 2. Bush/Cheney ''04: Leave no Child a Dime! 3. Bush/Cheney ''04: Because the Truth Just isn''t Good Enough. 4. Vote Bush in ''04: It''s a no-brainer! 5. Bush/Cheney ''04: Compassionate Colonialism 6. Bush/Cheney ''04: Leave no Billionaire Behind 7. Bush/Cheney ''04: Putting the "con" in conservatism 8. Bush/Cheney ''04: Thanks for not Paying Attention 9. Bush/Cheney ''04: The Last Vote You''ll Ever Have to Cast 10. Bush/Cheney ''04: This Time, Elect Us! 11. Bush/Cheney ''04: Four More Wars 12. Bush/Cheney ''04: Asses of Evil 13. Bush/Cheney ''04: Assimilate. Resistance is Futile 14. Bush/Cheney ''04: Apocalypse Now! 15. Vote Bush in ''04: Because Dictatorship is Easier 16. George W. Bush: A Brainwave away from the Presidency 17. George W. Bush: It Takes a Village Idiot 18. Don''t Think. Vote Bush! 19. BU_ _SH_ _!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God give me patience....And make it quick!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is showering up in a locker room with his buddy when he notices his friend has a huge penis. "Damn Bob, you''re hung!" Jim exclaims. "I wasn''t always this impressive, I had to work for it." "What do you mean?" Jim asked. "Well, every day for the past two years I''ve spent an hour each night rubbing it with butter. I know it sounds crazy but it actually made it grow 4 inches! You should try it." Jim agrees and the two say good bye. A few weeks later the two are in the same locker room and Bob asks Jim how his situation was. Jim replied, "I did what you said but my penis has actually gotten smaller! I lost two inches already!" "Did you do everything I told you? An hour each day with butter?" "Well, butter is expensive, so I''ve been using Crisco." "Crisco?" Bob exclaimed, "No wonder, man, Crisco''s shortening!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young couple decide to have sex for the first time so they go to the store to buy condoms. They find a popular brand and bring it to the register. The price on the box is $1.00 but when the cashier totals up the price it comes to $1.07. The couple asks what the extra 7 cents is for. The cashier replies back "tax." Then the young man says "I was wondering what held it on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama is so flat chested, the last time she had a breast was in a bucket at KFC.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Buddhist approaches a hotdog vendor and says: "Make me one with everything." He gives the vendor a $20 bill and waits. Finally he says: "Where''s my change?" Says the vendor: "All change must come from within."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all of the rascally behavior that was going on. He decided to send an angel down to Earth to check it out, so he called one of His angels and sent the angel to Earth for a time. When he returned, he told God, "Yes, it is bad on Earth; 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are not." God thought for a moment and said, "Maybe I had better send down a second angel to get another opinion." So God called another angel and sent him to Earth for a time too. When the angel returned he went to God and said, "Yes, it''s true, the Earth is in decline; 95% are misbehaving, but 5% are being good." God was not pleased, so He decided to E-mail the 5% that were good, because He wanted to encourage them. Give them a little something to help them keep going. Do you know what the Email said? Just wondering, I didn''t get one either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does the tooth fairy give for half a tooth? A: Nothing. She wants the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross a Scottish sheep with a Peruvian Mountain Goat? A: The Dolly Llama.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8." Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. "Religion?" "Baptist." "Go to room 18, but be very quiet as you pass room 8." A third man arrives at the gates. "Religion?" "Jewish." "Go to room 11, but be very quiet as you pass room 8." The man says, "I can understand there being different rooms for different religions, but why must I be quiet when I pass room 8?" St. Peter tells him, "Well the Catholics are in room 8, and they think they''re the only ones here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father, angry at his son for not doing well at school tells him, "At your age, George Washington was the best student in his class." "Yeah dad..." replies the kid..."and at yours, he was the President of the United States!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest came to a dying author to read him his last rites. "Do you reject the devil?" asked the priest. "This is no time to be making enemies," replied the author.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop stops a man for running a stop sign and the subject gives the cop a lot of grief explaining that he did stop. After several minutes, the cop explained to the gentleman that he didn''t stop, he just slowed down a little. The gentleman said "Stop or slow down, what''s the difference?" The cop pulled the guy out of the car and hit him with a nightstick for about a minute and then said, "Would you like for me to stop or just slow down?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WIFE : " I wish I was a newspaper, so I''d be in your hands all day." HUSBAND : " I too wish that you were a newspaper, so I could have a new one everyday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do fish paint with? Water colours!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do fish keep their life savings? At the river bank!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If someone leads but no one follows... are they just out for a walk? Is it possible for someone to become addicted to therapy? And If so, how would you treat them? Crime doesn''t pay... does that mean my job is a crime? Why is it that normal people are the ones you don''t know? Why is it that when our kids are naughty we ask "Do you want a spanking?" What are they going to say, "Yes please, may I have two?"... Why is it you get a penny for your thoughts but have to put in your two cents worth? May I refuse to inherit the earth? Practice makes perfect, but if nobody''s perfect, why practice?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men were talking. "So, how''s your sex life?" "Oh, nothing special. I''m having Social Security sex." "Social Security sex?" "Yeah, you know: I get a little each month, but not enough to live on!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife went in to see a therapist and said, "I''ve got a big problem, doctor. Every time we''re in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this ear splitting yell." "My dear," the shrink said, "that''s completely natural. I don''t see what the problem is." "The problem is," she complained, "It wakes me up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tired of a listless sex life, the man came right out and asked his wife during a recent lovemaking session, "How come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?" She glanced at him casually and replied, "You''re never home!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was in a terrible accident, and his "manhood" was mangled and torn from his body. His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance wouldn''t cover the surgery, since it was considered cosmetic. The doctor said the cost would be $3,500 for "small", $6,500 for "medium", $14,000 for "large." The man was sure he would want a medium or large, but the doctor urged him to talk it over with his wife before he made any decision. The man called his wife on the phone and explained their options. The doctor came back into the room, and found the man looking dejected. "Well, what have the two of you decided?" asked the doctor. The man answered, "She''d rather remodel the kitchen".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole and Sven are neighbors in Minnesota. Ole is in need of a new milk cow. He hears about a nice one for sale over the border in Wisconsin. He drives over to Wisconsin, looks at the cow, and reaches under to see if she gives milk. When he grabs the teat and pulls, the cow farts. Ole is very surprised, looks at the farmer who is selling the cow, and reaches under the cow to try again. He grabs another teat, pulls, and the cow farts again. Milk does come out, however, so after some discussion, Ole decides to buy the cow anyway and take it home. He calls over his neighbor, Sven, and says, "Come here and look at dis new cow I yust bought. Pull her teat and see vat happens dere." Sven reaches under and pulls; the cow farts. Sven looks at Ole and says, "You bought dis cow over dere in Visconsin, yah?" Ole is very surprised and says, "Yah, dats right, how did you know dat?" Sven says, "My vife is from Visconsin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People who live in glass houses should make love in the basement. Never read the fine print. There ain''t no way you''re going to like it. If you let a smile be your umbrella, then most likely your ass will get soaking wet. The only two things we do with greater frequency in middle age are urinate and attend funerals. The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket. To err is human, to forgive - highly unlikely Do you realize that in about 40 years, we''ll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos? Money can''t buy happiness -- but somehow it''s more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than in a Hyundai. Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.. Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween. After a certain age, if you don''t wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What happens when a Buddhist becomes totally absorbed with the computer he is working with? A: He enters Nerdvana.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m dyslexic, and attended a conference about the disorder with a friend. The speakers asked us to share a personal experiences with the group. I told them stress aggravates my condition, in which I reverse words and letters when I''m tense. When I finished speaking, my friend leaned over and whispered to me, "Now I know why you named your daughter Hannah."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Any time the alarm goes off after-hours at the municipal office where I work, the security company calls me at home and I have to go back and reset it. Late at night I got one of those calls. As I was getting ready to head out the door, my husband groggily said: "You''re not going down there by yourself at this hour." Just as I was thinking: "How thoughtful of him", he added, "Better take the dog with you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rushing to work, I was driving too fast and as a result was pulled over by the highway patrol. The state trooper noticed that my shirt had the name of a local high school on it. "I teach math there," I explained. The trooper smiled, and said, "Okay, here''s a problem. A teacher is speeding down the highway at 16 m.p.h over the limit. At $12 for every m.p.h over the limit, plus $40 costs, plus the rise in her insurance, what''s her total cost? I replied, "Taking the total, subtracting the low salary I receive, multiplying by the number of kids who hate math, then adding to that the fact that none of us would be anywhere without teachers, I''d say zero." He handed me back my license. "Math was never my favorite subject," he addmitted. "Please slow down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting a new girlfriend is like joining the Army. You get a new haircut and new clothes, and all information is given to you on a need-to-know basis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening two bachelors were talking over dinner. The conversation drifted from sports to politics, and then to cooking. "I got a cookbook once," said the bachelor. "But I couldn''t do anything with it." "Too much fancy stuff in it, huh?" asked his friend. "You said it." The first guy replied, nodding. "Every one of those recipes began the same way: ''Take a clean plate....''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Former Vice President Dan Quayle says that if you take out the profanity, the TV show "The Osbounes" is about good family values. You take out the profanity, and "The Osbournes" is about 30 seconds long.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ralph was one his way home from work on night, when to his horror, he suddenly realized that he''d completely forgotten his daughter''s birthday. He rushed to the toy store and asked the manager, "How much is the Barbie in the window?" "Which one?" The manager replied. "We have Workout Barbie for $19.95, Malibu Barbie for $19.95, Soccer Barbie is 19.95, Cinderella Barbie $19.95, Retro ''70''s Barbie $19.95, and Divorced Barbie $375." "Hold on," Ralph said. "Why is Divorced Barbie $375 when all the other Barbies are only $19.95?" "Well," said the store manager. "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken''s car, Ken''s house, Ken''s boat, Ken''s dog, Ken''s cat, Ken''s furniture....."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my wife and I showed up at a very popular restaurant, it was crowded. My wife went up to the hostess (who was blonde) and asked, "Will it be long?" The hostess, ignoring her, kept on writing in her book. My wife again asked "How much of a wait?" The blonde looked up, "About ten minutes." A short time later, the blonde got on the loudspeaker, and announced "Willette B. Long, your table is ready."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently I was behind a car with three bumper stickers: Don''t be fooled by genetically engineered food--demand labels and safety testing for food; Eat for the health of it; and Support organic farmers." The car was in front of me at a McDonalds drive-through.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady walked into a bar and there were no seats available, except for one at a table that was occupied by a man, and she decides to take it. He said, "Hello, my name is Jim Snow, what''s yours?" The women replied, "June." She went to get a drink and Jim Snow sat there smiling at her. When she came back he still sat there smiling. June was a little embarrassed, so she bashfully said, "Why are you smiling at me like that?" Jim answered, "Well, just imagine having 6 inches of Snow in June!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the nicest thing about a nudist wedding? You don''t have to ask - you can see who the best man is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies? A bingo machine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('True bravery is arriving home late after a boy''s night out, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and still having the guts to ask: Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a hotel and asked for a room. The guy behind the counter said there is only one room left but it is haunted. The man does not believe this so he gets the room. That night the man hears a voice saying "I`m gonna find you, I`m gonna get you, I`m gonna eat you!" The man runs away scared. The next day a father and his daughter get the room after they were warned. That night they hear "I`m gonna find you, I`m gonna get you, I`m gonna eat you!" The girl hides under the bed as the father follows the sound to the closet. He opens the door. There on the floor sits a little boy, picking his nose, saying "I`m gonna find you, I`m gonna get you, I`m gonna eat you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a hotel and asks for a room. The guy behind the counter tells him that there is one room left but it is haunted. The man gets the room anyway. That night he hears in a soft voice "If the log rolls over we`ll all die!" He runs away. The next day a father and his daughter get the room after they were told that it is haunted. That night they hear "If the log rolls over we`ll all die!" The girl hides under the bed as the father follows the sound to the bathroom door. He opens the door. There on the ground is a bunch of ants staring at a turd saying, "If the log rolls over, we''ll all die!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farm boy accidentally overturned a wagonload of corn. A farmer, who lived nearby, heard the noise and yelled to the boy, "Hey, Willis, forget your troubles and come in for a visit. I''ll help you pick the wagon up later." "That''s mighty nice of you," Willis answered, "but Pa wouldn''t like me to." "Aw, come on, boy," the farmer insisted. "Well, OK" the boy finally agreed, "but Pa won''t like it." After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. "I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset." "Don''t be foolish," the neighbor said with a smile; "by the way, where is he?" "Under the wagon," replied the boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the definition of wicker box? It''s what Elmer Fudd wants to do to Madonna.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so dumb that she thought Taco Bell was a Mexican phone company.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Jose and Josbe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Janet''s son, Trevor, lived in Georgia with his mom. Over the summer, Trevor went to California. On his way back to home, he decided to stop at an "adult video" store. The manager asked if he had an account. He admitted he didn''t, and asked to start one. The manager asked for his phone number and he gave it to them. The manager then replied, "It says that the account is under the name of Janet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W. Bush was invited to visit the Queen of England. The Queen gets her finest horses and buggy. When Bush gets off the plane, and onto the buggy, Bush and the Queen ingage in a conversation. In the middle of their conversation, one of the horse let out a really big, really smelly fart. The Queen quickly apoligizes and says "I''m sorry, theirs somethings not even a Queen can control." Bush replies "Ma''am, if you wouldn''t have said anything, I would have thought it was the horse."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nine year old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned at Sunday school. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. "When he got to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. "Then he used his walkie-talkie to radio headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved." "Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked. "Well, no. But if I told it the way the teacher did, you''d never believe it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Interviewer : Give me the opposite words. Banta Singh : OK. Interviewer : Made in India. Banta Singh : Destroyed in Pakistan. Interviewer : Good .... Keep it up. Banta Singh : Bad .... Put it down. Interviewer : Maxi - mum Banta Singh : Mini - dad Interviewer : Enough! Take your seat. Banta Singh : Insufficient! Don''t take my seat. Interviewer : Idiot! Take your seat. Banta Singh : Clever! Don''t take my seat. Interviewer : I say you get out! Banta Singh : You didn''t say I come in. Interviewer : I reject you! Banta Singh : You appoint me. Interviewer : .....!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, three friends met at an inn after not seeig each other for a very long time. They chatted for an hour or so, and then the topic turned to their wives. A: You know, something strange happened during my wife''s delivery. She was reading a book called "The Two Brothers" before her delivery and she gave birth to ''two'' children ! Isn''t that strange?" B: Yeah, but you want to know something stranger ? A similar thing happened to my wife, when she was pregnant ! She was reading the book "Amar, Akbar and Antony", and she gave birth to ''three children'' !!!" On hearing this, the third person C, took to his heels and started running. The other two were puzzled but they ran after C and caught up with him. A: "Hey C. Why did you run off ?" C: "My wife''s pregnant now and she''s reading "Alibaba and the Forty Thieves" !!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day an American General, a Russian General and an Indian General were all going to England in a ship. All of them were very boastful. AG : "I have the bravest and most courageous crew in the world. See for yourselves. Oy, you!" (he called to an American soldier) "Swim around this moving ship." The American soldier jumped into the sea without a word, and swam around the moving ship and returned. AG : See the guts ! RG : "Oh, that''s nothing. See this. You, (he called to a Russian soldier) swim 5 rounds around this moving ship!" The Russian soldier also jumped into the sea and swam 5 times around the moving ship and returned. RG : "See the guts!" IG : "Oh, that''s nothing compared to MY soldiers. You, (he called to Banta Singh) swim 10 times around this moving ship!" Banta Singh : "Am I your servant?" IG : "See the guts!" AG & RG : ....!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Proverb : Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Refined by me : Behind every successful man, there is a very much surprised woman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were having some problems and giving each other the silent treatment. The man realized that he''d need his wife to wake him the next morning at 5:00 a.m, for an early flight to Chicago. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence, he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 a.m." The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 a.m. and that he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn''t woken him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 a.m. Wake up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she plays hopscotch like this : Washington, California, Nevada, now Arizona', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was approached by his small son, who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you ''know'' what the Bible means?" The son replied, "I do know!" "Okay," said his father. "So, son, what does the Bible mean?" "That''s easy, Daddy. It stands for ''Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Norfolk to Las Vegas. The son, who had been looking out the window, turned to his mother and said, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don''t big planes have baby planes?" The mother, who couldn''t think of an answer, told her son to ask the flight attendant. So the boy asked the flight attendant, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don''t big planes have baby planes?" The flight attendant asked, "Did your mother tell you to ask me?" The boy said that she had. Smiling, she then said, "Tell your Mother that Southwest always pulls out on time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is the epitaph on the gravestone of an army mule: Here lies Maggie, who in her time kicked two colonels, four majors, ten captains, twenty-four lieutenants, forty-two sergeants, four hundred eighty-six privates, and one bomb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a story about a monastery perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the air. The only way to reach the monastery was to be suspended in a basket which was pulled to the top by several monks who pulled and tugged with all their strength. Obviously the ride up the steep cliff in that basket was terrifying. One tourist got exceedingly nervous about halfway up as he noticed that the rope by which he was suspended was old and frayed. With trembling voice, he asked the monk who was riding with him in the basket how often they changed the rope. The monk thought for a moment and answered brusquely, "Whenever it breaks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A story is told of a Jewish man who was riding on the subway reading an Arab newspaper. A friend of his, who happened to be riding in the same subway car, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he approached the newspaper reader. "Moshe, have you lost your mind? Why are you reading an Arab newspaper?" Moshe replied, "I used to read the Jewish newspaper, but what did I find? Jews being persecuted, Israel being attacked, Jews disappearing through assimilation and intermarriage, Jews living in poverty. So I switched to the Arab newspaper. Now what do I find? Jews own all the banks, Jews control the media, Jews are all rich and powerful, Jews rule the world. The news is so much better!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An undertaker had a busy day at work, and in front of him, was 3 new bodies that had been sent from the hospital. The first one his mouth opened wide. He then moved on to see the next body. It too had opened his mouth widely. Surprised, he went over to the last body. This body was charred and had a huge smile on his face. Feeling puzzled, he turned to ask the hospital personnel:&quot; What actually happened to these people? &quot;Well..&quot; replied the personnel, &quot;The first man died from laughing too much at a joke.&quot; &quot;The second man died while telling a very funny joke.&quot; &quot;The last man..well, he died while taking a picture. At least that was what he thought he was doing. He thought that the lightning was a camera''s flash.&quot;', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, there were three male dogs that set eyes on a beautiful female poodle. They all rushed over to her. Aware of her charms, she said, "I will go out with the first one of you who can use the words ''liver'' and ''cheese'' together in an intelligent sentence." Immediately the Lab said, "I like liver and cheese." "No imagination at all," said the poodle. Next was the muscular Rottweiler, who blurted, "I hate liver and cheese." "That''s worse than the Lab," she replied. Finally a tiny Chihuahua smiled at his opponents, gave the poodle a knowing wink, and said, "Liver alone, cheese mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a very stupid parrot that could only say: "Who''s there?" So one fine evening, while its owner was out shopping, the gas delivery man arrived at the door. He pressed the door bell and waited for the door to be opened. At that moment, the parrot said: "Who''s there?" The man then promptly replied: "Gas delivery man." The parrot then spoke: "Who''s there?" The man then repeated himself again. After several hours, the owner returned home. He was shocked to find a man outside his door, foaming in his mouth. Puzzled, he said:" Who''s that?" A voice from inside the house replied: "Gas delivery man."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy comes home from work one day to find his dog with the neighbor''s pet rabbit in his mouth. The rabbit is dead and the guy panics. He thinks the neighbors are going to hate him forever, so he takes the dirty, chewed up rabbit into the house and gives it a bath, blow dries its fur and puts the rabbit back into the cage at the neighbor''s house, hoping they will think it died of natural causes. A few days later, the neighbor is outside and asks the guy, "Did you hear that Fluffy died?" The guy stumbles around and says, "Um.. no.. um.. what happened?" The neighbor replies, "We just found him dead in his cage one day, but the weird thing is that the day after we buried him we went outside and someone had dug him up, gave him a bath and put him back into the cage. There must be some real sick people out there!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher to student: "I just read the composition on ''My House'' that you had submitted." Student: "Yes, is there anything wrong?" Teacher: "No. It was excellent. It was exactly the same composition that your older brother submitted last year." Student: "Well...we live in the same house..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young woman goes shopping and buys one bar of soap, one yogurt, one microwave dinner for one, one apple, and a romance novel. She goes to the checkout stand, where she notices that the clerk is staring at her. Flattered, she flutters her eyelashes and giggles nervously. He says, "Single, huh?" She replies coyly, "How did you guess?" "Because," he says, "You''re ugly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a Nascar race car, she burns rubber everynight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the sixth day, God created the platypus. And God said: Let''s see the evolutionists try and figure this one out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do women prefer old gynecologists? A. They have shaky hands!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Matters had progressed to the point where the freshman and his date were naked in the motel bed when the girl had a change of heart. "I suppose you''re going to tell me now that you''re waiting for ''Mr. Right''," he said dejectedly. "That''s a silly old romantic notion," laughed the coed. "I''m just waiting for ''Mr. Big''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Jim, a duck, was swimming in a pond when he came up to another duck and asked "What are doing?" "Blowing bubbles," she replied. Jim met 3 more ducks and they all said the same thing. When Jim came up to a 5th duck he said "Let me guess, you''re blowing bubbles?" "No," said the duck, "I am Bubbles!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s green, has 3 eyes, sharp teeth, and blood on its face? A: I don''t know, but it''s on your shoulder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If there are 12 cats on a fence and 1 cat jumps off, how many are left? None, they''re all copycats!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears? A: She was afraid she might get hearing aids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What did the blonde''s right leg say to her left leg? A:Nothing, they haven''t met yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes observed in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger: Blonde#1: I can''t seem to get this door unlocked! Blonde#2: Well, you''d better hurry up and try harder, its starting to rain and the top is down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman pulled a blonde over because she was driving the wrong way on a one-way street. Cop: Do you know where you were going? Blonde: No, but wherever it is, it must be bad ''cause all the people are leaving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma cooks so bad, your family prays after they eat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three midgets. Each one wanted to win a world record. The first midget went in to the place for world records and said I want to see if I have the worlds smallest hands. He came happy and said i got the record. So the second one goes in and says I want to see if I can get the record for the worlds smallest feet. He came out all happy and said i got the record. Then the last one goes in and said I want to see if I have the worlds smallest penis. He came out all sad and said, "Who the in the hell Michael Jackson?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so hairy . . . . . she has to have a hair trapper in her kitchen sink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat I had to take five trains, eight cars, and twelve airplanes just to get around her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blondes are like pool tables - every time you put a dollar in, she''ll rack your balls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Say "Darn, officer you must have been going fast to catch up with me." 2. When he approaches you, look at his gut and say, "Hmmm, I thought officers were supposed to be physically fit." 3. Sway and ask if his bulletproof vest protects him from projectile vomiting. 4. Lie on the ground and ask him to draw your outline in chalk. 5. Throw his nightstick and tell the police dog to go fetch it. 6. Ask if you can use his pepper spray to spice up your pizza. 7. Tell him you wanted to be a cop, but I decided to graduate high school. 8. When he asks you to walk the line "Riverdance" instead. 9. Instead of pleading with the 5th amendment, plead with the 13th or 16th. 10. When he asks for your license, say, "Oh, sure, officer, could you hold my beer for a sec?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The slick defense lawyer was drilling the star witness, in an attempt to ruffle the mans feathers, and secure his own case. He began egging him on. "You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man of your background" the lawyer sneered. The witness replied, "If I wasn''t under oath, I''d return the compliment."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn''t find a space with a meter. So he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don''t park here, I''ll miss my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES." When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note: "I''ve circled this block for 10 years. If I don''t give you a ticket, I''ll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three boys are walking along the beach one day when they see a cave. The first boy goes in and is just looking at a banknote on a big rock when a ghostly voice calls out, "I am the ghost of Auntie Mabel and this five dollars stays on the table!" The second boy goes in and is reaching for the money when the same thing happens again. The third boy goes in, sees the five dollars and cries out, "I am the ghost of David Crockett and this five dollars goes in my pocket!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three ants went to the beach to swim. Two jumped directly in the water. The other went back home and after an hour returned. Why? She forgot her swimming suit!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Danny, asked Mrs Waters, "What''s usually used as a conductor of electricity?" "Why- er..." "Correct, wire. Now tell me, what is the unit of electrical power?" "The what??" That''s absolutely right. The watt."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a strip club and sees a really pretty girl right in front of him. He goes up to her and asks, "Hey, Honey, want to come home with me?" She says yes. They go back to his house that night and they have sex. Throughout this whole time he hasn''t been able to see her properly. When she rolls into the moonlight, he caught a glimpse of her. "What, the...! What are you doing here?" He had just realised that he was in bed wth his mother-in-law!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A white man, a Cuban, and a Mexican, are all sitting at a bar when the Mexican throws a taco out the window. The white man asks, "Why''d you throw that taco out?" The Mexican replies, "Where I come from we have a lot of those." Next the Cuban throws some weed out the window. The Mexican asks, "Why''d you throw that weed out?" The Cuban replies, "Where I come from we have a lot of that..." Suddenly the white man throws the Mexican out the window. The Cuban, shocked, asks, "Why''d you throw him out the window?!" The white man answers, "Well..where I come from we have A LOT of those."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup to ya later!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cats does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Cats can''t hold a light bulb', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that a car hit her and she turned around and said "Hey! Who threw that rock!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? To. To who? To you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you titillate an ocelot? Oscillate its tit a lot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the appointed day, St. Peter escorted John to the Holy Mother''s sanctuary. John went before Her, knelt, and said: "Holy Mother, I''ve always looked to You for guidance, and You have granted me peace and serenity through some difficult times. But I have one question that has nagged me during my whole time on earth. In all the paintings that were done of you, and in all the sculptures that were carved of you, you always looked so sad. Why is that?" Mary thought for a moment, pursing her lips. She said: "I always wanted a girl."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a big controversy on the Jewish view of exactly when life begins. In Jewish tradition, the fetus is not considered viable until after it graduates from medical school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid... She site on the T.V and watches the couch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, she''s the reason they declared world hunger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is like a hockey player. She doesn''t change her pad for three periods.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, that every time you smack her butt, you can ride the waves!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father asked his son: "Why do you take the medicine before it''s time? " The son answered:" To surprise the germs! "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack was summoned by the Disciplinarian where his son, Tracey was enrolled. Tracey always throw stones at his playmates and he never missed. Jack replied to the Disciplinarian : Sir, please look at the bright side. My son will grow up to be a very effective baseball pitcher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked her children just before they were about to leave class for Mass, "And why is it necessary to be quiet during Mass?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl went to a dentist to have her teeth filled. The dentist asked, "What kind of fillings do you want? White or silver?" The girl replied, "Chocolate fillings."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two muffins were sitting next to each other, in an oven, as they were being cooked. One muffin turned to the other muffin, and said, "Man, it''s hot in here." Then the other muffin turned to the first muffin and screamed, "AHHH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story that happened in a South African hospital. There was this case in the hospital where a patient always died in the same bed and on a Friday morning regardless of his medical condition. This puzzles the doctors and some even think it has something to do with the supernatural. One day, all the doctors decide to go down to the ward where it always happens on the Friday mornings. They want to take a look at what''s going on. Friday morning comes and everyone''s at the hospital ward waiting for the terrible phenomenon to occur again. Right at the expected time, the cleaner comes in and unplugs the life support system so that she can use the vacuum!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CO-PILOT: Commander! We are being attacked! COMMANDER: Report your height and status! CO-PILLOT: I''m 5''11 and sittin'' in the cockpit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One to his friend: "My little brother started walking last week!" The other friend: "Where did he go? He should be kilometers away!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dad to his son: If someone calls for me, tell him that I''m out. The son: And if he doesn''t call?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked his student: Give me an example of 6 animals. The student: 3 Lions, 2 Tigers , and 1 Cheetah !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Suddenly the electricity went off in the house of a blonde. So, she wanted to light a match. After being tired of looking for the match, she blew out the candle and went to sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning a man came into the church on crutches. He stopped in front of the holy water, put some on both legs, and then threw away his crutches. An altar boy witnessed the scene and then ran into the rectory to tell the priest what he''d just seen. "Son, you''ve just witnessed a miracle!" the priest said. "Tell me, where is this man now?" "Flat on his butt over by the holy water!" the boy informed him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel. I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents. The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I''d accumulated a fortune of $1.37. Then my wife''s father died and left us two million dollars."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they''d be called bagels!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two guys in the Army. One day one of the guys gets a letter from his mother and after reading it becomes very sad. His friend asked him what was wrong. The first guy responded by handing him the letter. So the second guy reads that his friend''s mother had written that the first guy''s girlfriend was in bed with arthritis. "Well" The friend said to the first guy... "That''s not so bad..." The first guy turns to him and says "Yea, That''s what you think. I know those Ritis boys and Art is the worst one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob, an extremely wealthy 60-year-old, arrives at a country club with a beautiful and charming 25-year-old blonde. His buddies at the club are all aghast. They corner him and ask, "Bob, how''d you get the trophy girlfriend?" Bob exclaims, "Girlfriend? She''s my wife!" His friends are shocked, but continue to ask, "So, how''d you persuade her to marry you?" Bob replies, "I lied about my age." His friends respond, "What do you mean? Did you tell her you were only 40?" Bob smiles and says, "No, I told her I was 90."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah the Prophet and the false prophets of Baal. She explained how Elijah built the altar, put wood upon it, cut the steer in pieces and laid it upon the altar. And then Elijah commanded the people of God to fill four barrels of water and pour it over the altar. He had them do this four times. "Now," said the teacher, "can anyone in the class tell me why the Lord would have Elijah pour water over the steer on the altar?" A little girl in the back of the room raised her hand with great enthusiasm. "To make the gravy," came her reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A candidate brought dice into the examination hall for MCQ. He started tossing the dice to select his answers. The superintendent just gave a glimpse at this candidate, as he passed by, as it is common to have students trying their luck. Very soon the candidate finished his whole paper and slept on his table. Half an hour later, the candidate sat up, and started tossing the dice again The superintendent felt curious, and approached the candidate. Superintendent : "Gentleman, why are you tossing the dice again, since you''ve already finished all the questions earlier on?" Candidate : "Sir, I have to double check my answers"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of flashlight do blonds use? The solar powered kind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat she can give the homeless a home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I slide to first. I feel like I''m going to burst. Diarrhea, diarrhea. I slide to two. My pants are filled with goo. Diarrhea, diarrhea. I slide to third. I dropped a runny turd. Diarrhea, diarrhea. I slide to home. My pants are filled with foam. Diarrhea, diarrhea. First its in the pants, then its on the floor. I make a 20 yard dash to the bathroom door. Some people think its funny. Its coming out back runny. Well, diarrhea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nurse dies and goes to heaven. She is met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter who asks her questions about her life. Over St. Peter''s shoulder the nurse spots a man in a white coat sitting on a cloud with a stethoscope around his neck. "Oh brother!" she cries. "Is that a doctor?" St Peter glances over his shoulder and says, "No, that''s God. He just thinks he''s a doctor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Additional quotes made by physicians in actual medical records: 1. Discharge status: alive but without permission. 2. The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983. 3. The patient refused an autopsy. 4. The patient has no past history of suicides. 5. Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital. 6. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant. 7. Since she can not get pregnant with her husband, I thought you would like to work her up. 8. She is numb from her toes down. 9. Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches. 10. Exam of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized. 11. Rectal exam revealed a normal size thyroid. 12. The patient was prepped and raped in the usual manner. 13. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Staff physicians include Dr. Who, Dr. Kevorkian, and Dr. Demento. 2. Tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicle. 3. Annual breast exam conducted at Hooters. 4. With your last HMO, your birth control pills didn''t come in different colors with little "M''s" on them. 5. Your "primary care physician" is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month. 6. Directions to your doctor''s office include, "Take a left when you enter the trailer park." 7. Your kidney transplant surgery is held up while your surgeon awaits his arrangement for grave robbing. 8. The only expense covered 100% is embalming. 9. Only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter. 10. Only item listed under Preventive Care feature of coverage is "an apple a day". 11. The "Patient responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges" is not a typo. 12. You ask for Viagra. You get a Popsicle stick and duct tape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you need a driver''s license to buy liquor when you can''t drink and drive?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl learned in school, that instead of words, pictures and symbols would be drawn to indicate something if words weren''t understood. Later that day, she needed to go into the bathroom, looked at two pictures, and went in one. A teacher asked her, "Why did you go into the boys'' bathroom?" She answered, "The picture showed a person wearing pants, and I''m wearing pants. The other picture showed someone wearing a dress, and I''m not."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some friends were on vacation in Maine, and while watching fireworks heard their small son say, "Oh, God!" The father quickly cautioned his son, "Please don''t speak the Lord''s name in vain." The boy nodded but obviously mis-heard, because he asked quietly, "Is it OK if I speak his name back in Minnesota?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And Moses looked upon the Lord and said: "We are your chosen people and you want us to cut the tips off of our WHAT?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife: I always bring your picture with me everyday when I go to the office. Husband: Oh. That must be because you love me so much. Wife: No, it''s because whenever I see your picture, I realize that however hard the problem is in office, I''m lucky with my work because there is a much bigger problem and that''s you." Husband:Ouch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor. Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy) Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you? Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I''m dumb? Doctor: Then why are you so happy? Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Bean: (crying) "The doctor called, Mom''s dead." Friend: "Condolence, my friend." After receiving a phone call, Mr. Bean cries even louder. Friend: "What now?" Mr. Bean: "My sister just called, her mom died too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('AA and AA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lumber camp advertises for a lumberjack. A skinny little guy shows up at the camp the next day carrying an axe. The head lumberjack takes one look at the puny little guy and tells him to get lost. "Give me a chance to show you what I can do," says the skinny guy. "Okay, see that giant redwood over there?" says the head lumberjack. "Take your axe and cut it down." The guy heads for the tree, and in five minutes he''s knocking on the lumberjack''s door. "I cut the tree down," says the guy. The lumberjack can''t believe his eyes and says, "Where did you learn to chop down trees like that?" "In the Sahara Forest," says the puny man. "You mean the Sahara Desert," says the lumberjack. "Sure......!! That''s what they call it now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who lived in a block of apartments thought it was raining and put his head out the window to check. As he did so a glass eye fell into his hand. He looked up to see where it came from in time to see a young woman looking down. "Is this yours?" he asked. She said, "Yes, could you bring it up?" and the man agreed. On arrival she was profuse in her thanks and offered the man a drink. As she was very attractive he agreed. Shortly afterwards she said, "I''m about to have dinner. There''s plenty. Would you like to join me?" He readily accepted her offer and both enjoyed a lovely meal. As the evening was drawing to a close the lady said, "I''ve had a marvelous evening. Would you like to stay the night?" The man hesitated then said, "Do you act like this with every man you meet?" "No," she replied, "Only those who catch my eye."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women came before King Solomon, dragging between them a young man. "This young man agreed to marry my daughter," said one. "No! He agreed to marry my daughter!" said the other. And so, they haggled before the king until he called for silence. "Bring me my biggest sword," he said, "and I shall cut the young man in half. Each of you shall receive a half." "Sounds good to me," said the first woman. But the other woman said, "Oh sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let the other woman''s daughter marry him." The wise king did not hesitate a moment. "The young man shall marry the first woman''s daughter," he proclaimed. "But she was willing to cut him in two!" exclaimed the king''s court. "Indeed," said King Solomon, "that shows that she is indeed the true mother-in-law."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Librarian: "Please be quiet. The people next to you can''t read." Boy: "What a shame! I''ve been reading since I was six."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman, who had just been married to a gambling man, had learned upon marrying him that he always came home well after midnight. She didn''t like this one bit, and no amount of reasoning with him would make him miss a night out with the guys, so every night for a week she would stay up till he came home, and when she heard him enter the house she would call out: "Is that you, Ben?" She did this for a week, and then he started coming home promptly at 7:00 every night. Why, you might ask? His name was Jacob.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Briton, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden. "Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British." "Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They''re naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French." "No clothes, no shelter," the Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they''re being told this is paradise. They are Russian."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp, "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?" As the shopkeeper''s heart melts, he gets down on his knees, so that he''s on her level, and asks, "Do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabbit, or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabbit over there?" She, in turn, blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice... "I don''t fink my pet pyfon weally gives a thit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day little Billy was walking past his mother''s room when he heard strange noises. He opened thecracked the door, and looked in. He saw his mother laying naked on the bed rubbing her hands all over her body moaning "I need a man! I need a man!" A couple of days later as he walked past her room he heard the noises again so he looked into her room and saw his mother laying naked on the bed rubbing her hands all over her body moaning "I need a man! I need a man!" A few days later as he walked past her room he heard some more strange noises coming from her room, so he looked in again. This time he saw his mother laying naked on the bed with a naked man laying on top of her. So he ran to his room, took off all his clothes, hopped into bed and started rubbing his hands all over his body moaning "I need a new bike! I need a new bike!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Molly wrote a letter to Santa Claus one day. Dear Santa, Please give me a Workout Barbie and a new milkman because he is sleeping with Mommy. Love, Molly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before setting off on a business trip to Tulsa, I called the hotel where I''d be staying to see if they had a gym. The hotel receptionist''s sigh had a tinge of exasperation in it when she answered. "We have over 300 guests at at this facility" she said. "Does this ''Jim'' have a last name?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The dean of a women''s college, addressing her charges, concluded, "...and remember, young ladies, you represent not only your own honor but that of the school. When approached by young men, ask yourself: Is an hour''s pleasure worth a lifetime of disgrace? Now, are there any questions?" A young lady immediately raised her hand and said, "Tell me, how do you make it last an hour?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a congregation that decided to have four worship services each Sunday. There was one for those new to the faith. Another for those who liked traditional worship. One for those who had lost their faith and would like to get itback. And another for those who had a bad experience withchurch and were complaining about it. They have names foreach of the services: "Finders, Keepers, Losers, Weepers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A beautiful blonde goes into a bar and sits down next to a guy that''s so homely looking, he hasn''t had a date in over a year, also, he''s sooooo dumb that one night he slept with a ruler next to his head to see how long he slept. He figures that he has absolutely no chance in the world to score a date with this ravishing buxom blonde, when suddenly she strikes up a conversation with him! Soon they become rather chummy. It starts to get late and the bartender calls out last drink for alcohol. The blonde leans over to the guy and says, "Let''s have this last drink at my apartment." Taken back by her request, and trembling, the guy finally utters the word, "Okay." They get up from the bar stool arm and arm headed for the door. The blonde stops him and says, "Before we go back to my apartment there''s one thing I have to tell you, I''m on my menstrual cycle." He says, ..."That''s ok, I''ll follow you in my Honda."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde filled her car with gas at a self-service gas station. After she had paid and driven away, she realized that she had left the gas cap on top of her car. She stopped and looked and, sure enough, it was lost. Well, she thought for a second and realized that other people must do the same thing from time to time, so maybe it was worth going back to look by the side of the road. She figured that even if she couldn''t find her own gas cap, she might be able to find one someone else lost that would fit her car. She didn''t have to search long when, sure enough, she found a gas cap. She tried it, and it went into place with a satisfying click. "Great," she thought, "I lost my gas cap, but I found another one that fits. And this one''s even better because it locks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, "I hear you Irish are a bunch of drinkin'' mother-fuckers. I''ll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back." The room is quiet and no one takes of the Texan''s offer. One man even leaves. Thirty minutes later the gentleman who left shows back up and taps the Texan on the shoulder. "Is your bet still good?" asks the Irishman. The Texan says yes and asks the bartender to line up 10 pints of Guinness. Immediately the Irishman tears into all 10 of the pint glasses, drinking them all back-to-back. The other pub patrons cheer as the Texan sits in amazement. The Texan gives the Irishman the $500 and says, "If ya don''t mind me askin'', where did you go for that 30 minutes?" The Irishman replies, "Oh, I had to go to the pub down the street to see if I could do it first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys are in an bar sitting around a log fire with their dogs and get to talkin'' about them. First one says, "My dog is called Woodworker. Go Woodworker!" The dog grabs a log from fire and with his teeth and fashions a beautiful figurine. Next one says, "My dog is called Stoneworker. Go Stoneworker!" The dog drags a rock from the fire front and creates a beautiful carving. Third one says, "My dog is called Iron Worker." He puts the fire tongs into the fire and gets them red hot. "Now," he says, "I''ll just touch him on the nose and you watch him make a bolt for the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golfer hits a wicked slice off the tee that ricochets through the trees and into the next fairway narrowly missing another golfer. When the first golfer gets to his ball he is greeted by his unintended victim who angrily tells him of the near miss. "I''m sorry, I didn''t have time to yell fore," says the first golfer. "That''s funny" replies the second, "you had plenty of time to yell ''SHIT!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she has to go on three weight loss systems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes people with a lot of cents have little sense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama so fat that she bent over and got arrested for selling crack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so tall, she did a cartwheel and hit Jesus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat she has to get baptized in Sea World.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day God said that he would grant anyone in line a wish. This one guy got stuck at the back of the line, which made him kind of upset. The people before him went on through the line, and everybody wished that they could be beautiful. The last guy came up to God and said, "I wish that all the people that wished they were beautiful were ugly again." The next time that you''re last in line - be happy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a guy he had to deliver a package to the nearest town which took three days to get there. If he leaves on Friday and arrives on Friday how is that possible? He doesn''t stop to rest. *His horse''s name is Friday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a casket containing a mummy, a rather rare occurrence in Israel, to say the least. After examining it, he called Abe, the curator of the Israel museum in Jerusalem. "I''ve just discovered a 3,000 year old mummy of a man who died of heart failure!" the excited scientist exclaimed. Abe replied, "Bring him in. We''ll check it out." A week later, the amazed Abe called the archaeologist. "You were right about both the mummy''s age and cause of death. How in the world did you know?" "Easy. There was a piece of paper in his hand that said, ''10,000 Shekels on Goliath''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Hebrew people were sitting around Mt. Sinai. You could hear only a subdued murmur among them, but you could feel the tension in the air. For hours now, Moses had been on top of the mountain, hidden from their gaze by clouds wafting around its top. Sometimes the clouds became dark and you could hear thunder rolling down. In spite of the warm weather, this caused a shudder among the waiting mass. The end of day was approaching and dusk was beginning to set in when suddenly a figure came through the clouds and walked down the steep mountainside carrying a heavy load. It was Moses. Moses set down his load and raised his hands. "Friends," he said. "Friends, it was hard work and I have done my best. I have negotiated with Him. I used every possible argument, every trick I could think ofand I think I was successful. The good news is: I brought him down from 15 to 10. The bad news is: Adultery is still in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sid and Al were sitting in a Chinese restaurant. "Sid," asked Al, "Are there any Jews in China?" "I don''t know," Sid replied. "Why don''t we ask the waiter?" When the waiter came by, Al said, "Are there any Chinese Jews?" "I don''t know sir, let me ask," the waiter replied and he went into the kitchen. He quickly returned and said, "No, sir. No Chinese Jews." "Are you sure?" Al asked. "I will check again, sir." the waiter replied and went back to the kitchen. While he was still gone, Sid said, "I cannot believe there are no Jews in China. Our people are scattered everywhere." When the waiter returned he said, "Sir, no Chinese Jews." "Are you really sure?" Al asked again. "I cannot believe there are no Chinese Jews." "Sir, I ask everyone," the waiter replied exasperated. "We have orange jews, prune jews, tomato jews and grape jews, but no one ever hear of Chinese jews!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a rabbit who tells jokes? A FUNNY BUNNY!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has 2 jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl''s place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes of his trousers and washes his hands again. The girl has been watching him and says, "You must be a dentist." The guy, surprised, says "Yes....how did you figure that out?" "Easy," she replied, "you keep washing your hands." One thing led to another and they make love. After they were done, the girl says, "You must be a good dentist." The guy, now with a boosted ego says, "Sure, I''m a good dentist, How did you figure that out?" "Didn''t feel a thing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In biology class the teacher asks, "Can anyone tell me why a flounder is flat?" Little Johnny raises his hand. "Go ahead, Little Johnny." "My uncle told me it''s because a whale raped the flounder." "That''s terrible, Little Johnny. I''ll have to speak to your parents about this. Let''s try another one. Why does a lobster''s eyes protrude from its head?" Again Little Johnny raises his hand. "We''ll give you another chance." "My uncle said when the whale raped the flounder, the lobster saw it, and his eyes popped out in shock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly Wal-Mart greeters were sitting on a bench during break time and one turns to the other saying, "Slim, I''m 73 years old and I''m just full of aches and pains. I know you''re about my age; how do you feel?" Slim says, "I feel just like a new born babe." Rather amazed at this reply, Slim''s co-worker repeats his statement back in the form of a question, "Really? A new born babe?" "Yup," grins Slim, "No teeth, no hair and I think I just wet my pants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer purchases an old, run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields are grown over with weeds, the farmhouse is falling apart, and the fences are collapsing all around. During his first day of work, the town preacher stops by to bless the man''s work, saying, "May you and God work together to make this the farm of your dreams!" A few months later, the preacher stops by again to call on the farmer. Lo and behold, it''s like a completely different place -- the farm house is completely rebuilt and in excellent condition, there are plenty of cattle and other livestock happily munching on feed in well-fenced pens, and the fields are filled with crops planted in neat rows. "Amazing!" the preacher says. "Look what God and you have accomplished together!" "Yes, Reverend," says the farmer, "but remember what the farm was like when God was working it alone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What do you call a 300-pound stripper? A:broke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Have you heard of the dyslexic cow who attained enlightenment? A. It kept on repeating OOOOMMM!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why didn''t Cain please God? A: Because he just wasn''t Able.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sophisticated lady went into an expensive restaurant. Before sitting, she asked her waiter, "Do you serve crabs here, sir?" The waiter replied, "Yes ma''am, we serve anybody in here. Please have a seat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were sitting enjoying a view of the full moon. The first blonde says; "I wonder which is further away? The moon or Florida?" The second blonde replies; "Well, duh! The moon! Can you see Florida?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two English guys were in the middle of the scorching desert with no food or water. They both decide to stop and have a rest in the sand. Then one guy has a genius idea. The guy says, "I support Liverpool football team, so I''ll eat the liver of my camel!" The second guys says, "I support Arsenal football club, but I''m not that hungry!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My survey which I conducted said that 8 out of 4 people don''t understand fractions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Who! Who who? You must have the stammers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ugly: (adjective) A state of being in which you are constantly in. Example: You', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, her bungee cord has to be hooked onto Mars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she makes Godzilla look like a pocket dragon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she''s the founder of Button Poppers Anonymous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she has to iron her clothes on the street.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two fat guys in a bar, one of the guys, puts his empty glass on the bar and says, "your round", the other guy says, "so are you, you fat basted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A South African, an Australian and an Englishman are all drinking in a bar. Suddenly, the South African downs the remainder of his drink, tosses his glass in the air, draws his pistol and shoots the glass. "In South Africa our glasses are so cheap that we don''t need to drink from the same ones twice," he says proudly. The Australian, who is obviously impressed by this, downs his drink, tosses his glass, draws his gun and shoots the glass. "In Australia we''ve got so much sand to make glasses that we don''t need to drink from the same ones twice," he says. The Englishman pauses to give this some thought, then downs his drink, casually tosses his glass into the air, draws his gun, and shoots the South African and the Australian. "In England we have so many South Africans and Australians that we don''t need to drink with the same ones twice," he says.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama''s so old, she farted and dust came out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama''s so ugly, she stuck her face out the window and cops pulled her over for mooning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she put on a red coat, walked outside, and everyone started yelling, "Kool-Aid, Kool-Aid"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy took his girlfriend to the movies. During the pre-views, she asked him if he would go and buy her some M & Ms. When he returned with her candy, she opened the bag, picked out all the brown ones and threw them away. "What did you do that for?" he asked her. "I''m allergic to chocolate!" she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jerry: So you have both a nice mommy and a pretty mommy? Steve: Yup. They''re lesbians.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey! I recognize you! You''re the third one over on the evolutionary scale!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why should you be careful when it''s raining cats and dogs? A. Because you might step in a poodle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If brains were fuel, you wouldn''t have enough to power an ant''s motorcycle around the edge of a penny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the zombie cross the road? Because he didn''t have the guts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat when she stepped on the scale she said, "Wow, that''s my phone number!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, when she stepped on a dollar she made change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she has more rolls than the bakery shop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two blondes sitting on the roof of a house. The ladder they had used to get on the roof fell down onto the ground. Blonde #1: Go get the ladder! Blonde #2: No way! If I jump down, I''ll kill myself. Blonde #1: I know! I''ll shine my flashlight down to the ground and you can climb down the beam of light. Blonde #2: No way! You''ll just turn off the flashlight when I''m halfway down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there ? Scold Scold who ? Scold out here, let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mormon acquaintance once pushed Mark Twain into an argument on the issue of polygamy. After long and tedious expositions justifying the practice, the Mormon demanded that Twain cite any passage of scripture expressly forbidding polygamy. "Nothing easier," Twain replied. "No man can serve two masters."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call frozen blonds? Frosted Flakes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman stranded on an island. They see a cave up ahead. The Englishman goes in and sees some toast on a rock. He goes over to it but then a voice comes. "Dont eat the toast," the voice shouts. The Englishman runs out. The Scotsman walks in and sees the toast as well, the voice comes back. "Don''t eat the toast." The Scotsman thinks it''s his imagination but then he hears it again, "Don''t eat the toast," says the voice,the Scotsman runs out. The Irishman wondering what''s going on, goes inside. He hears the voice once, thinks nothing of it. He hears the voice again, still he ignores it. He picks up the toast and eats it. The voice shouts, "I warned you once, I warned you twice, I wiped my arse upon the slice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Noah: "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head" Adam and Eve: "Strangers in Paradise" Lazarus: "The Second Time Around" Esther: "I Feel Pretty" Job: "I''ve Got a Right to Sing the Blues" Moses: "The Wanderer" Jezebel: "The Lady is a Tramp" Samson: "Hair" Salome: "I Could Have Danced All Night" Daniel: "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" Esau: "Born To Be Wild" Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego: "Great Balls of Fire!" The Three Kings: "When You Wish Upon a Star" Jonah: "Got a Whale of a Tale" Elijah: "Up, Up, and Away" Methuselah: "Stayin'' Alive" Nebuchadnezzar: "Crazy"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A preacher finished the service one morning by saying, "Next Sunday, I am going to preach on the subject of liars. As a preparation for my sermon, I would like you all to read Mark 17." On the following Sunday, the preacher rose to begin. Looking out at the congregation he said, "Last week I asked you all to read Mark 17. If you have read the chapter, please raise your hand." Nearly every hand in the congregation went up. Smiling, the preacher said, "You are the very people I want to talk to. Mark has only 16 chapters."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tour bus driver drives with a bus full of seniors down a highway, when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. After approx.15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts. She repeats this gesture about eight times. At the ninth time he asks the little old lady why they do not eat the peanuts themselves, whereupon she replies that it is not possible because of their old teeth, they are not able to chew them. "Why do you buy them then?" he asks puzzled. The old lady answers, "We just love the chocolate around them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible: Psalm 23. She gave the youngsters a month to learn the verse. Little Bobby was excited about the task, but he just couldn''t remember the Psalm. After much practice, he could barely get past the first line. On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Bobby was so nervous. When it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my shepherd and that''s all I need to know."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?" One child blurted out, "Aces!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?" "No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot''s wife looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Johnny interrupted, "My Mummy looked back once, while she was DRIVING," he announced triumphantly, "and she turned into a telephone pole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde rings up an airline. She asks, "How long are your flights from America to England?" The woman on the other end of the phone says, "Just a minute..." The blonde says, "Thanks!" and hangs up the phone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb she thought a quarterback was a refund!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Bonnie became restless as the preacher''s sermon dragged on and on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Feeling edgy, a woman took a hot bath. Just as she got comfortable, the doorbell rang. She got out, wrapped herself in a towel, and went to the door. A salesman wanted to know if she needed any brushes. She slammed the door in his face and returned to her bath. The doorbell rang again. She got out, wrapped herself in a towel, slipped on a wet spot, and hit her back against the tub. She struggled into her street clothes and, with every move a stab of pain, drove to the doctor. After examining her, the doctor said, "Nothing''s broken. But you need to relax. Why don''t you just go home and take a nice hot bath?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was looking at this parked, motorized wheelchair once, and I noticed that it had a dial on it to control it''s speed. At one end there was a turtle, and at the other end there was a rabbit. I just assumed at first that the turtle was representing the slower speed, and that the rabbit was for the faster speed, but then I remembered who won when those two animals raced. I think that it would be cool if cars used this same system too. You know, you get pulled over by a police officer and he says to you "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you were speeding? We had you clocked on our radar at going ''Rabbit'' and I''m sure that you know the posted speed limit here is only ''Raccoon''. Now we''ll just let you off with a warning this time since you were only going a ''hare'' over the speed limit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Uh huh, "sure, honey," or "yes, dear" Translated: Absolutely nothing. It''s a conditioned response. "It would take too long to explain" Translated: "I have no idea how it works." "I was listening to you. It''s just that I have things on my mind." Translated: "That girl standing on the corner is a real babe." "Take a break honey, you''re working too hard." Translated: "I can''t hear the game over the vacuum cleaner." "That''s interesting, dear." Translated: "Are you still talking?" "I can''t find it." Translated: "It didn''t fall into my outstretched hands, so I''m completely clueless." "What did I do this time?" Translated: "What did you catch me at?" "You look terrific." Translated: "Oh, please don''t try on one more outfit, I''m starving." "I''m not lost. I know exactly where we are." Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it so hard to make a blond snowman??? Because you have to hollow out its head!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A handsome mid-age couple, John and Gail, like living in Texas. Even though they have lived in Texas most of their married life John never had a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale at Sheplers one day, he buys them, wears them home, walking proudly. He walks into the house and says to his wife: "Notice anything different about me?" Gail looks him over, "Nope." Frustrated John storms off in to the bathroom, undresses, and walks back into the room completely naked except for the boots. Again, he asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything DIFFERENT NOW?" Gail looks up and says, "John, what''s different? It''s hanging down today it was hanging down yesterday, it''ll be hanging down again tomorrow. Furious, John yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT IS HANGING DOWN, GAIL? IT''S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT''S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!!" To which Gail replies, "Shoulda bought a hat, John. Shoulda bought a hat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double-pane energy efficient kind. But this week I got a call from the contractor complaining that his work had been completed a whole year ago and I had yet to pay for them. Boy oh boy, did we go around! Just because I''m blonde doesn''t mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I proceeded to tell him just what his fast-talking sales guy had told me last year... that in one year the windows would pay for themselves. There was silence on the other end of the line so I just hung up and I haven''t heard back. Guess I must have won that silly argument!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men die and go to hell. There is a white guy, a Polish guy, and a black guy. The devil makes a deal with the three men. He tells them if they can stand on his hand for 10 days without melting he will give them their lives back. So the three men agree to the deal and stand on his hand. After only 2 days the white guy melts and after the 4th day the Polish guy melts also. The devil thinks this is going to be a piece of cake. "Two down and one to go", he tells the black man. But after 10 days the black man is still standing strong. The devil asks him how this is possible and the man replies, "Chocolate melts in your mouth not in your hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black person that wants to be and acts just like Jackie Chan? Blackie Chan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walked into the pet store and, after looking up and down the aisles, asked the sales clerk for help. "I''d like a box of birdseed," said the lady. "For which kind of bird?" he asked helpfully. "Oh, I dunno," she replied. "Whichever will grow the fastest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde pulls over at the gas station, gets out of her car, opens the hood, and checks the engine oil. After a few seconds of intelligent thinking, she takes the dipstick in her hand and, raising her chest high, walks up to the attendant. "Excuse me sir, but can I buy a longer dipstick?" "May I ask why you need a longer one ma''am?" "Because this one isn''t long enough to reach the oil!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While shopping at the grocery store, I noticed that the tuna packed in spring water was labeled dolphin safe, but the tuna packed in oil was not. I mentioned this fact to the blonde cashier and mused out loud, "I wonder why?" The blonde replied, "Must be because the oil would suffocate them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A proud elderly gentleman was in the hospital for a series of tests because his bodily functions were extremely disrupted. During the night he made several trips to the bathroom because he thought he had to go to the bathroom. After failing to go several times he finally decided to just ignore it. When he awoke later in the night he found his bed full of diarrhea. Being too proud to admit he just relieved himself in his own bed he carefully took the sheets and tossed them out the window. However, while this was going on, a drunk was stumbling home in the darkness. Before he can figure out what''s happening, the soiled sheets come down on him. He kicks and punches the sheets trying to get them off of him. A security guard runs up and asks what the heck is going on. The drunk replies, "I don''t know what happened, but I think I just beat the crap out of a ghost."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was riding in a cab one day when he decided to tap the cab driver on the shoulder to request an alternate route. The cab driver screams his head off and loses control of the cab, causing it to slam into a lightpost. After checking themselves out the man says, "I''m sorry. I didn''t know you were so jumpy." To which the cab driver replies, "It''s not your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver after driving a hearse for 10 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear _______________, I really like you. I was wondering if you would like to go out with me. Please check one of the boxes below: ___ Yes ___ No ___ No, I already have a girlfriend, sorry ___ Yes, if you don''t tell my girlfriend ___ No, I am already fathering a child ___ No, I''m gay Love, ______________ *written by clueless_chic*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what would have happened if there had been three wise WOMEN instead of three wise MEN, don''t you? The three wise WOMEN would have asked for directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the Baby, cleaned the stable, made a casserole, and given practical gifts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were 3 ants in a house. They all had to decide where they wanted to sleep. One ant decides to sleep in the cabinet, one in the cookie jar, and one in the toilet. The next morning they all woke up and meet on the stove top to ask each other how their sleep was. The one who slept in the cabinet said his was hot. The one who slept in the cookie jar said his was sweet! The one that slept in the toilet said that " First it got dark, then it rained, a big gust of wind came, and if it wasn''t for that big log.....I would have drowned!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Russians were called "Reds," a long while ago. So a war general named Rudolf walks into a bakery. The baker starts talking about owning a reindeer. He starts asking questions about it to the general. When the baker gets home, he tells his wife, "Rudolf the Red knows reindeer!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the teacher have to put on her glasses during class? Because the kids were to bright!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t crabs share? Because there shelfish!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the name of the baseball player who sits under a tree? Babe Root!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend of mine spent two hours in the salon getting her hair colored, cut, and blow dried. After all that, was it too much to ask to be treated like Cinderella at the ball? Yet when she went to the desk to pay, the receptionist said to her, "Hello, madam, who is your appointment with today?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many roaches does it take to screw in a lightbulb? You''ll never know because when you turn on the light, they scatter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Sara. Sara who? Sara doctor in the house?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are four elephants in a Volkswagon. How do you know when one went into your refrigerator? Answer: There is a set of footprints in the butter! How do you know when there were two elephants in the fridge? Answer: There are two sets of footprints in the butter! How do you know when there were three elephants in your fridge? Answer: you have three sets of footprints in the butter! How do you know when four elephants were in your fridge? Answer: You have an empty Volkswagon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a bar... and it hurt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were going on a hike, and came to a fork in the road. A sign was in the center that said "Bear left." One of the blondes said,"I''m happy that was taken care of, now we finally are able to take the upper trail," so they proceeded left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A College football team was on a winning streak, until they found out that their star QB was failing English. The QB couldn''t play until he brought his grade up to a C. The other players on the team were desperate for him to play in the championship, so they asked his English professor for extra credit. He agreed and called in the QB. The professor said: "I will give you a simple spelling test and if you pass, I will raise your grade. In fact if you get one word right, I will raise the grade." So the QB takes the test and gets every single word wrong. He begged the professor for one more chance. The professor agreed and told him that if he could get one letter in the word that was given to him right, he would have a C in English. The word was coffee. The football player responded, "This is easy, kauphy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Michael Jackson dating twenty-eight year olds? The answer is: Because there''s twenty of them! (twenty eight year olds....)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Tarzan''s favorite Christmas song? Jungle Bells!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the turtle do in the Olympics? The hurdle run!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five days before Christmas, Santa was having a horrible day. And by horrible, I mean his wife was sick with the flu, 23 elfs called in sick, and nothing was getting done, so they were really behind schedule. *Knock-Knock,* Santa heard, so he went to go open the door. There was an Angel carrying a christmas tree. "Where would you like me to put this?" asked the angel. And that is why the Angel is put on top of the Christmas tree.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Michael Jacksons does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Answer: One, but 500 children to hold the ladder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the elephant call the locksmith? Because he lost his keys in his trunk!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do turtles talk to each other? Shellphones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a mouse to smile? Say Cheese!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch a cold!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cop say to the bad popcicle? Freeze!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t G-Unit take the bus? They only had 50 cent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a vampire''s favorite holiday? Fangs-giving!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sven and Ole are visiting a relative in Texas. While walking along the street, they see a sign on a store front which reads: Suits $5.00 each Shirts $2.00 each Trousers $2.50 per pair Sven says to his pal, "Hey Ole! We could buy a whole lot of dem and ven ve get back to Minnesota, ve could sell them and make a fortune." "Now ven ve go into the shop, yust let me do all da talkin'' cause if dey hear your Minnesota accent dey might tink ve are dumb Norwegians and try ta raise da price - but I can speak with a perfect Texas drawl." They go in, and Sven drawls out an order of 50 suits at $5.00 each, 100 shirts at $2.00 each and 50 pair of trousers at $2.50 each. The owner of the shop says "You''re Norwegians from Minnesota, aren''t you?" "Uff da!" says a surprised Sven. "How''d you know dat?" The owner says, "Because this is a dry-cleaners."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Monday morning, a mailman was walking through the neighborhood on his usual route. As he approached one of the homes, Bob, a homeowner, was coming out with a load of empty beer and liquor bottles. "Wow, Bob, looks like you guys had a hell of a party this weekend," the mailman commented. Bob replied, "We had about 15 couples from around the neighborhood over and things got a bit wild. We got so drunk that we started playing ''Who Am I?''" "How do you play that?" the mailman asked. Bob continued, "Well, all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with a sheet covering us, with only our units showing through a hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is." The mailman laughed and said, "I''m sorry I missed that." "Probably a good thing you did," Bob responded, "Your name was guessed four or five times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? A: So she wouldn''t wake up the sleeping pills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cat say to the other cat on the phone? Can you hear me-ow?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wee Hughie came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting for him. "What''s the story this time, Hughie?" he asked sarcastically. "Let''s hear a good excuse for a change." Wee Hughie sighed, "Everything went wrong this morning. The wife decided to drive me to the harbour. She got ready in ten minutes, but then the ferry didn''t turn up. Rather than let you down, I swam across the river, ran over the mountain, borrowed a bicycle and cycled the 20 miles through the glen to this office." "You''ll have to do better than that. Hughie," said his boss, disappointed. "No woman can be ready in ten minutes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco. Pastor Mike was looking at the nativity scene outside when he noticed the baby Jesus was missing from the figures. Immediately, Pastor Mike turned towards the church to call the police. But as he was about to do so, he saw little Jimmy with a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the little infant, Jesus. Pastor Mike walked up to Jimmy and said, "Well, Jimmy, where did you get the little infant?" Jimmy replied, "I got him from the church." "And why did you take him?" With a sheepish smile, Jimmy said, "Well, about a week before Christmas I prayed to little Lord Jesus. I told him if he would bring me a red wagon for Christmas, I would give him a ride around the block in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which sea will make you go ape? The Chimpansea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you invited all the alphabet to tea who would be late? The letters ''UVWXYZ'' because they all come after ''T''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an alien with no ears? Anything you like, he can''t hear you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a horse that escaped from jail? A Zebra.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a cat''s favourite exercise? Puss-Ups!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a fish and a grizzly? A Bearacuda.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do psychics ask so many questions when they supposedly already know the answers?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone has a photographic memory, you just don''t have any film.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All believers in telekinesis raise my hand!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I couldn''t fix your brakes, so instead I made your horn louder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are in an elevator when a good-looking man enters. They notice that, though he is very handsome, he has very bad dandruff. He gets off at his floor, and when the doors close, the brunette looks at the blond and says, "Someone needs to give him some Head and Shoulders". The blonde replies, "How do you give someone shoulders?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your brain was chocolate it wouldn''t fill an M&M', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wear tank tops and support your right to bare arms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Strategic responses to the ever-dangerous "Do I look Fat" question: "No, not to Stevie Wonder." "No babe, you''re not fat, you''re fluffy." "Does this tie make me look stupid?" "No hablo ingles." "If I answer that question, my life will be in danger." "Let me jog around to your front and take a look." "No, honey. But just to be safe, steer clear of one-legged sea captains." "May I consult a lawyer before answering that?" "Look at your belt size honey, if it says ''equator'' on the tag you know the answer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Micheal Jackson and a PS2 have in common? They''re both plastic, can be black or white and can be turned on by children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Avon Lady, your door bell is broken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three girls and a genie on a mountain. There was a redhead, a brunette and a blonde. The only one who knew how to get off the mountain was the genie, but she offered the girls a wish to turn into birds and fly off. "I want to be a blue jay so I can showoff my blue color in the sun." the redhead said to the genie. POOF! The bluejay landed off the mountain safely. "I want to be a cardinal so I can go visit my friends in St. Louis." the brunette said. POOF! The cardinal landed safely off the mountain, too. Then the blonde shouted "I want to be cuter than a bluejay and a cardinal! I want to be a penguin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat people jog around her instead of the block, for a LONGER run!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1st SLAP "Our ship has just lost 82% of its power, our captain''s head fused with plexiglass and we have an eleven minute window to escape certain death. Let''s go to bed together." 2nd SLAP "The evil bad guy, who has demonstrated Superman-like strength, has just killed two of our crew. Let''s split up and walk aimlessly through the ship looking for him." 3rd SLAP "I just found an unknown, odd, bizarrely pulsating alien object. I''m gonna open it up and stick my hand in it to see what happens." 4th SLAP "We just picked you up from an abandoned moon in deep space and you can read my mind, which no other human being has ever been able to do. Neat. Let''s go to bed." 5th SLAP "We are a medical rescue ship with a crew of six with only six ''jump pods'' so if we ever actually rescued anyone, we wouldn''t be able to actually bring them home." SLAP!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife, Susie, a cell phone for their first anniversary. Susie was excited about the phone and the next day, while shopping, it rang and to her surprise, it was her husband. "Hi, Susie," he said. "How do you like your new phone?" Susie replied, "I just love it! It''s so small and your voice is clear as a bell, but there''s one thing I don''t understand ..." "What''s that, sweetie?" asked her husband. "How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign posted at a golf club in Scottsdale, Arizona 1. Back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart. 2. Form a loose grip. 3. Keep your head down. 4. Avoid a quick back swing. 5. Stay out of the water. 6. Try not to hit anyone. 7. If you are taking too long, please let others go ahead of you. 8. Don''t stand directly in front of others. 9. Quiet please...while others are preparing to go. 10. Don''t take extra strokes. Well done - Now flush the urinal, go outside, and tee off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish man walks out of a bar..............Hey, It could happen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day in heaven, George Bush saw Moses & walked up to him. When he tried to say hi Moses ran off. The next day George Bush saw Moses again. He then tried to say hi, but he sped off again. The next day when George Bush saw Moses he asked him. " How come every time i try to say hi to you, you run off?" Moses replied," Last time I saw a bush, I was stuck in the desert for 40 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear some rich guy wants to build a tavern at the top of Mount Everest. Talk about raising the bar high!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class was squirming around, scratching his crotch, and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed, and whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy. The teacher told him to go down to the principal''s office. He was to telephone his mother and ask her what he should do about it. He did as he was told and returned to his class. Suddenly, there was a commotion at the back of the room. She went back to investigate, only to find him sitting at his desk, with his penis hanging out. "I thought I told you to call your mom!" she said. "I did," he said, "And she told me that if I could stick it out till noon, she''d come and pick me up from school." KIDS, DON''T YOU JUST LOVE THEM???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cows Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington, and they can track her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don''t we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it''s worked for over 200 years and we''re not using it anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The real reason that we can''t have the Ten Commandments in a Courthouse: You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery" and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('how many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2, but I don''t know how they got in there!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little guy is seated next to a big guy at a bar and asks his name. The big guy says, "They call me Tex." The little guy replies, "Oh, you must be from Texas." The big guy says, "Nope. I''m from Louisiana." "Hmmm," the little guy replies, "Then why do they call you Tex?" The big guy looks down at him and says, "Would you like to try calling me Louise?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Keep your lights blinking for a whole hour. 2.Go really slow on a highway. 3.Smile and wave at everyone that you see at a stoplight. 4.Turn your radio up while playing opera music. 5.When stopping at a stop sign run out of your car and look to see if any cars are coming then yell, "It''s all clear!" 6.When coming to a speed bump, get out and say "My car won''t make it!" then try to push it over the bump. 7.At every stoplight, run out and check your tires and yell, "Don''t worry it''s OK!" 8.Take a sponge and a bucket of water and pull over to wash the bugs off the car every time you see one. 9.Fill the back seats with plastic bags, put the windows down, and drive around really fast. 10.Change your licence plate every you stop and yell, "They''re after me! Anybody got a screwdriver?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat, the last time you went on a bus, the ticket read ''''Please allow up to 28 days for delivery.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your cooking is so bad, the homeless give it back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The temporary Sunday School teacher was struggling to open a combination lock on the supply cabinet. She had been told the combination, but couldn''t quite remember it. She went to the pastor''s study and asked for help. The pastor came into the room and began to turn the dial. After the first two numbers he paused and stared blankly for a moment. Finally he looked serenely heavenward and his lips moved silently. Then he looked back at the lock, and quickly turned to the final number, and opened the lock. The teacher was amazed. "I''m in awe at your faith, pastor," she said. "It''s really nothing," he answered. "The number is on a piece of tape on the ceiling."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the blonde cheer? I''m blonde, I''m blonde,I''m B.L.O.N.....uh,oh well...I''m blonde, I''m blonde,I''m... yeah, yeah,yeah...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blond name his pet zebra? Spot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? A: "What''s a lightbulb?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between pokemon and pokewomon? poke balls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas so old that when she was in school they didn''t have history.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with the letter F and ends in UCK? FiretrUCK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Osama sleep with any of his 5 wives? Because all he sees is bush.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there Jack Jack Who I don''t know any jack', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('5 boys are walking by a "haunted" house" One of the five boys said, "I bet I could go in there for more than five minutes." A couple minutes later, he comes out screaming "GHOST!" The second boy decides to try to go in for more than ten minutes. He comes out screaming after four minutes, "HE WASN''T LYING! GHOST!" The third and fourth boy go in together and try to stay in for more than an hour. They come out screaming the same thing. The last boy walks and says he can stay in there a whole day. Once he walked in, the other boys heard him say, "Hi Grandma."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the lightbulb fail his test? He wasnt bright enough!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a cow do for entertainment? Listen to moo-sic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, "Surely I can''t look that old"? Well, here is some karma for that. I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his DDS diploma, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 40-odd years ago. Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was WAY too old to have been my classmate. After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Lawton Senior High School. "Yes. Yes, I did. I''m a Wolverine." he gleamed with pride. "When did you graduate?" I asked. He answered, "In 1961. Why do you ask?" "You were in my class!" I exclaimed. He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, wrinkled son-of-a-b*tch asked, "What did you teach?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is such a redneck, when I look at her family tree, it goes straight up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a flying skunk? A smell-icopter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she sat on a gamecube and made it into a gameboy advance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so fat, she sat down in Wal-mart and lowered the prices.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an elephant with Darth Vador? An elevator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your a redneck when there are 15 cars in your driveway, and the only one that moves is your house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, I asked her what was for dinner and she put her foot on the table and said "CORN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat when she sees a school bus go by, she says "STOP THAT TWINKY!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck when you go to a family reunion to find a girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck when you mow your lawn and find 10 cars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so fat, she jumped up and got stuck in the sky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid she threw butter out the window to see a butterfly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your uncle Jack was stuck on a roof, would you help your uncle Jack off?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went into my proctologist''s office for my first rectal exam. His new nurse, Elaine, took me to an examining room and told me to get undressed and have a seat until the doctor could see me. She said that he would only be a few minutes. After putting on the gown that she gave me I sat down. While waiting I observed that there were three items on a stand next to the exam table: a tube of K-Y jelly, a rubber glove, and a beer. When the doctor finally came in I said, "Look Doc, I''m a little confused. This is my first exam. I know what the K-Y is for, and I know what the glove is for, but can you tell me what the BEER is for?" At that Doctor Paul became noticeably outraged and stormed over to the door. He flung the door open and yelled to his nurse....... "Darn it ELAINE!!!!!!!!!!! I said a BUTT LIGHT"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and how the letters are used to define bra sizes? If you have wondered why, but couldn''t figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed! {A} Almost Boobs . . . {B} Barely there. {C} Can''t Complain! {D} Dang! {DD} Double dang! {E} Enormous! {F} Fake. {G} Get a Reduction. {H} Help me, I''ve fallen and I can''t get up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a schizophrenic Buddhist? A: Someone who is at two with the universe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there? Mayonaise Mayonaise who? Mayonaise a lot of jokes on this website.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a drunk and a druggie? Drunks run a stop sign and druggies stop at it and wait till it turns green.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shannon received a phone call from the foreman plant that her husband worked at. He sounded grim and she immediately knew something was wrong. "What happened? Is Patrick all right? Please tell me he''s ok," she said. The man on the line said, "Shannon, there was an accident at the brewery and your husband is . . . dead." "Oh my goodness, what happened?" Shannon asked. The foreman replied, "He fell into a vat of beer." "Did he at least die quickly?" sobbed Shannon. The man paused, then said, "Well, no . . . he got out three times to use the bathroom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He knew how to swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting an old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted, "Are there any alligators around here?" The beachcomber shouted back, "Nah! We ain''t seen gators in these parts for years." Feeling safe, the tourist began swimming leisurely towards the shore. About halfway there, he shouted, "Hey, how''d you get rid of the alligators?" The beachcomber said, "We didn''t do anything. The sharks got ''em."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did baby corn say to mama corn? A: Where''s pop corn?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid you got locked in an open convertibale car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat. She has more ass than a donkey farm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb she took back the donut because it had a hole in it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don''t know. They can''t get the dead one out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some items have the strangest directions/ warnings. Here are a few I''ve noticed. On a toilet plunger: Do not use as an umbrella. On a carton of milk: May contain dairy products. On a tricycle: Will hurt if on top of someone. On popcorn: Will pop if heated. On candy: Directions: Take of wrapper, insert into mouth, chew, and swallow. (No, really?) On bean bags used for juggling: Do not eat. On lunchmeat: Do not mistake as toilet paper. On Gameboy: To play,you must have a thumb. After computer error: Keyboard malfunction, press enter to continue. On coke bottle: Do not try to insert head. On skateboard: May move if rode on. On shampoo bottle: Warning: May create a lather. Roadsign: Warning: Unfinished bridge 3 miles. *3 miles later* We told you there was an unfinished bridge!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit ? A: The bucket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dog is a man''s best friend because it gives no advice, never tries to borrow money, and has no in-laws.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 8999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With so much turmoil in the world, God decided to pay a visit to earth to check things out. He strolled into a bar and approached the first man he saw. "If you believe in me enough to give me $50," he said, "I will grant you eternal life." "Sorry, I''m an atheist," the fellow replied, "and have never believed in God." God walked up to another man and made the same offer. "Well, I''m an agnostic and not really sure if I believe in you or not," the guy said, "but here''s 50 bucks, just in case." As the Lord turned away, a third man ran up to him. "I''m Pat Robertson and don''t really care if you''re God or not," he said excitedly. "Just teach me the trick you did with the agnostic and I''ll give you $100."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly that you scared away a man-eating shark!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A collector of rare books ran into an acquaintance who told him he had just thrown away an old bible that he found in a dusty, old box. He happened to mention that Guten-somebody-or-other had printed it. "Not Gutenberg?" gasped the collector. "Yes, that was it!" "You idiot! You''ve thrown away one of the first books ever printed. A copy recently sold at an auction for half a million dollars!" "Oh, I don''t think this book would have been worth anything close to that much," replied the man. "It was scribbled all over in the margins by some guy named Martin Luther."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, you can see her from space.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Orange Orange who Orange you tired of hearing the same stupid jokes about oranges?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a woman who came home from work. She had a very long day and just wanted to relax. Just as she was about to sit down, the phone rang. "Hello?" she said as she picked it up. "Are you married?" the voice said. "Who is this?" she asked. No answer. She hung up the phone. Just as she was about to sit down again, the phone rang. "Hello?" she said, picking up the phone again. "Do you have children?" the voice said. "Who the crap is this?" she said No answer. She hung up the phone. Just as she was about to sit down AGAIN, the phone rang AGAIN. "HELLO?!?!?!" she yelled, "Now this is it, if you don''t tell me who you are, I am going to call the police!" "Ma''am you seem frustrated, why don''t you do yourself a favor and join GEICO Insurance where we strive to make your life easier."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Chinese guy was trying to exchange yen for dollars and asked the teller, "Why it change, yestoday I get two hunat dollar fo yen - today Iget a Hunat eighty?" The teller says - "Fluctuations!" The Chinese guy says "Fluc you white guys too"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a stay-over in another city, so upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day''s route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened to her. She answered the phone, sobbing, and said she couldn''t get out of her room. "You can''t get out of your room?" the captaind asked, "Why not?" The stewardess replied, "There are only three doors in here," she cried, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says "Do Not Disturb"!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('+ You dance and it makes the band skip. + You are diagnosed with the flesh eating virus, and the doctor gives you 22 more years to live. + You go to the zoo and the elephants throw you peanuts. + Your driver''s license says, "Picture continued on other sid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy walks into a bar, sits down and asks the bartender,"Got any specials today?" The bartender replies, "Yes, as amatter of fact, we have a new drink that was invented by a gynecologist who is a patron of ours. It''s a mixof Pabst Blue Ribbon beer and Smirnoff vodka." The guyasks, "Geez, what kind of drink is that?" The bartender responds, "We call it a Pabst Smir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They like to keep their clients in the dark!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so slow that if you were a train engine, the caboose would be leading.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the pencil cross the road? It was lead!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are these kids at school, each bragging about how they ruined something in an amount of time. 1st kid: I wore out a pair of shoes in 1 month. 2nd kid: I wore out a pair of jeans in 1 week. 3rd kid: Oh that''s nothing, I wore out my babysitter in 5 minutes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Can you pay a little attention to this lesson?! Pupil: I am trying my best to pay as little attention as I can!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went into a restaurant that served ''breakfast at any time''. So, I asked for French Toast in the time of the Renaissance', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about all the Wal-Marts being taken out of Afghanistan? Yeah thet''re putting in Targets!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asks a first grader a simple math question. TEACHER:" If you had 50 cents in one pocket, and you asked you dad for another 50 cents, how much would you have?" STUDENT:"50 cents." TEACHER: "You obviously don''t know how to add." STUDENT: "You obviously don''t know my dad!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are frogs so happy? A: They eat whatever bugs them!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Depends on how many lightbulbs need changing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say the word pig before each word. Pigs About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look Now say the word pig after each word Pigs About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look Next say the word pig before and after each word Pigs About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look Finally read the list of words from the bottom up. Pigs About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look Have a Great day :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What happens when two frogs collide? A: They get tongue tied Q: How does a frog feel when he has a broken leg? A: Unhoppy Q: What happens when you mix a frog with a bathtub scrubby-mit? A: A rubbit Q: Why did the frog read Sherlock Holmes? A: He liked a good croak and dagger Q: What happened to the frog''s car when his parking permit expired? A: It got toad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do blondes wear big hoop earrings when they go on a date? So they have some place to put their feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your breath is so bad, you need a tic-tac the size of a watermelon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One mistake my mom made when I was three: she taught me how to read the word napkin. The second mistake she made: I asked her why "napkins" were under the sink. She said they were for "special occasions" The third mistake she made: My mom asked me to set the table for the special occasion tonight. So I went to the bathroom and got the "napkins" for special ocassions, and set them on the table. When I got done, my dad came in and burst out in laughter, along with my uncle and aunt as they walked in. When my mom came in, her face turned bright red.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a women who bought a new house but didn''t know what to name it. So she stuck her head out the window and heard Hairy Butt! So she decided to name the house Hairy Butt. Then sometime later she had a baby boy but didn''t know what to name it, so she stuck her head out the window and heard the word Crack, so she named her son Crack. The next day she lost her son so she called the police and said "Help! I looked all over my Hairy Butt but I can''t find my little Crack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat, when you were born, you came out singin'' "It''s a small world after all."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the chicken say after it crossed the road? A: "Why is everyone always talking about me?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the rooster cross the road? A: To prove he wasn''t chicken. Q: Why did the pencil cross the road? A: It was lead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat and hairy, that if she dyed her hair green, people would use her for golf practice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a couple. One day the husband went to work, as usual. All of a sudden a man in a truck appeared at the front door. The husband, frightened, hid behind a tree. The man exchanged a few words with the wife and left. The husband decided to get rid of that man once and for all. The next day, the husband went to work. But this time, he carried a shotgun with him. The man in the truck came again, the husband shot the man. Then the wife came out and cried," You idiot! That man was filling in for my boyfriend!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child: Mom! I got a 100% on my homework! Mom: Really? On what subject? Child: A 40% on science and a 60% on spelling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so dumb she can''t get the ball to touch the ground.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to break up a dating couple: Knock-knock. Who''s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I dumped your girlfriend last night?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a party, a man came up to a stranger and asked "Have you heard the latest Bush joke?" The man replies, "I am Bush." The man said, "Oh. I''ll tell it slowly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Bush was visiting a classroom where a teacher was giving a lesson on blood circulation. Trying to make the lesson clearer, he said, "Now, children, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run to my face." "Yes, sir," one of the girls said. "Then why is it," he continued, "that while I am standing upright the blood doesn''t run to my feet?" "Because your feet aren''t empty," replied a boy in the back of the room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid, you threw a rock at the ground and missed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Bush looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approaching him. "What is it now?" sighs the president. "It''s this abortion bill," replies the aide. "What do you want to do about it?" "Go ahead and pay it," says the president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher in California asked her class, "How many of you are Republicans?" Everyone in the class raised their hands except for one girl. "Mary," the teacher inquired, "Why didn''t you raise your hand?" "Because I''m not a Republican," she replied. "I''m a Democrat." The teacher asked her, "Why are you a Democrat?" And Mary said, "Well, my mother and my father are both Democrats, so I''m a Democrat, too." "Well," said the teacher in an annoyed tone, "That''s no reason why you have to be a Democrat. You don''t always have to be like your parents. What if your parents were both criminals?" "Then," Mary said, "We''d be Republicans."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George Bush senior and junior were dragging the deer they had just shot back to their truck. Another hunter approached, pulling his along, too. "Sirs, I don''t want to tell you how to do something," he said, "but I can tell you that it''s much easier if you drag the deer the other way, then the antlers won''t drag on the ground." After the other hunter left, they decided to try it. A little while later, George junior said to George senior, "You know, that guy was right. This is a lot easier!" "Yeah," said George senior, "but we''re getting farther from the truck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you fall out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on your way down?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you eat a bowl of stupid for breakfast this morning?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde. The cop asked to see the blonde''s driver''s license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. "What does it look like?" she finally asked. The policewoman replied, "It''s square and it has your picture on it." The driver finally found a square mirror, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said. The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn''t realize you were a cop."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma stinks so bad she has to use Right Guard and Left Guard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom: Why did you get a grade so low? Junior: Because of absence. Mom: Who, You? Junior: No, the kid who sits right next to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Larry, name two pronouns. Larry: Who, Me? Teacher: That answer is correct.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Mississippi River unusual? Because it has four eyes and can''t see!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did they sign the Declaration of Independence? At the bottom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Alvin, how many letters are in the alphabet? Alvin: 18. Teacher: Wrong, there are 26. Alvin: No, teacher, there used to be 26, but ET went home in a UFO and the CIA went after him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Name an animal that lives in the tundra. Pupil:A reindeer. Teacher: Good, now name another one. Pupil: Another reindeer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher, I can''t do this problem! "Any five year old can do that problem." "Damn! No wonder I can''t do it! I''m almost ten!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Atlas is the biggest thief in history, because he held up the whole world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock. Who''s there? Terra. Terra who? Terra reason you won''t let me in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when every car in the nation is pink? Answer: a pink carnation (the flower)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a priest, a bishop, and the Pope. They were all at the park and they saw a deep pond. The Pope told the bishop and the priest, "I bet I can walk on water". So he goes to the pond and, amazingly, he walks on water and gets to the other side. Then the bishop tells the priest, "I bet I can walk on water". So the bishop goes to the pond and, amazingly, he walks on water and gets to the other side. The priest is so surprised by all this he decides to give it a shot, so he goes to the pond and he steps on the water but he falls in and gets drenched. On the other side, the Pope is telling the bishop, "Do you think we should''ve told him about the stepping stones in the pond?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes decide to go duck hunting. Neither one has ever been before, but they decide to go anyway. They take a couple of guns and a hunting dog and head out into the woods. A few hours later, they still haven''t caught anything. "I don''t get it," says the first blonde. "Why haven''t we caught anything yet?" The second blonde says,"I keep telling you, I just don''t think we''re throwing the dog high enough."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the new blonde paint? It''s not too bright but it spreads real easy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were making their first doctor visit, the wife being pregnant with their first child. After everything checked out, the doctor took a small stamp and stamped the wife''s stomach with indelible ink. The couple was curious about what the stamp read, so when they got home, the husband got out his magnifying glass to try to see what it was. In very tiny letters, the stamp said, "When you can read this, come back and see me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a horny fish? A blowfish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Jimmy! Count from one all the way to ten! Jimmy: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10. Teacher: Good, now what comes after that? Jimmy:Jack, queen and king!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is 4-2? two. What is 8-6? two. Who wrote Tom Sawyer? Twain Now say the answers altogether. Two two Twain. Have a nice twip!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child: "Teacher! I can''t find my boots!" Teacher: "Are you sure?" Child: "Yes! There is only one pair left, and it''s not mine!" Teacher:"Are you sure?" Child:" Definitely! Mine had snow on them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all go to a bar. The redhead walks up to the bartender and says,"I''ll have a BL." So the bartender gives her a Bud Light. The brunette walks up next and says,"I''ll have an ML." So the bartender gives her a Miller Light. The blonde is catchingon so she goes up to the bartender and says,"I''ll have a 15." The bartender thinks about it, looks around, and says,"Ok, you stumped me. What''s a 15?" The blonde goes,"Duh! 7 and 7."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following event actually happened to a famous basketball coach. "When I first got a job as La Salle University''s basketball coach, the phone rang and my wife told me it was Sports Illustrated. I cut myself shaving and fell down the steps in my rush to get the phone. When I got there, a voice on the other end said, ''For just 75 cents an issue...''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t skeletons ever play music at church? Because they don''t have any organs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the statue say to the other after a break-up and make-up? I''m sorry I took you for granite. (granted) hahahaha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Hershey''s chocolate taste so good? Because they are made by women! (Her-She) hahahaha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golf ball is a golf ball, no matter how you putt it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child: Mommy, why am I so skinny? Mommy: Don''t worry about it, dear. When your father was born, he only weighed four pounds. Child: Really? Did he live?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My uncle is very superstitious. He won''t work any week that has a Friday in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so fat she played pool with the planets!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Harry and Sarah were having a petty argument. After shouting back and forth, Sarah finally says, "Let''s make a deal. To end this argument, you admit that I am right and I will admit that I am wrong." Harry thought for a moment, agreed, and asked her to go first. Sarah replied, "I''m sorry Harry, I am wrong." In response, Harry shouts happily, "You''re right!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Earth Worm: Oh, I wish that darn evil Mister Barney hadn''t chopped my brother into two sections! Other Earth Worm: Why? Earth Worm: Because, now I have two half brothers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo? A: The lawyer charges more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Melvin checked out a book from the library because the title read "How to Hug". It turned out to be volume 7 of the encyclopedia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What happened then? A: He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me." Q: Did he kill you? Lawyer: Were you alone or by yourself? Lawyer: Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in? Lawyer: Was that the same nose you broke as a child? Lawyer: You don''t know what it was, and you didn''t know what it looked like, but can you describe it? Lawyer: Have you lived in this town all your life? Witness: Not yet. Lawyer: A Texas attorney, realizing he was on the verge of unleashing a stupid question, interrupted himself and said, "Your Honor, I''d like to strike the next question."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re pretty... pretty ugly! You finally figured out how to screw in that lightbulb, but the power went out. You''re smart... smart as a fencepost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so poor everytime someone rings the doorbell the toilet flushes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid you thought "harass" was two words!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blond quit his restroom attendant job? A: He couldn''t figure out how to refill the hand dryer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If my dog''s face looked like your face, I''d shave his ass and make him walk backwards!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Ike, Anne, Wyatt, Tillie. Ike, Anne, Wyatt, Tillie who? Ike Anne Wyatt Tillie (I can''t wait till) it''s three o'' clock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called when an insect kills themself? Pesticide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Dewey. Dewey Who? Dewey(Do we) have to listen to all this knocking?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Justin. Justin who? Justin town and thought I''d say hello.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Water. Water who? Water you doing?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald(I swallowed) my gum!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Kip. Kip who? Kip your hands off me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Howie. Howie who? Howie gonna figure this out?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, a teacher was showing a child a picture of a firefighter taking a child out of a burning building. The teacher asked what that was. The child replied,"A pregnant firefighter." Instead of scolding him, she calmly asked,"Do you know what pregnant means?" The little boy just said, "Yes, it means to be carrying a child."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so dumb that she went to the movies and after they told her under 17 not permitted she went back and got 16 more friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have a face like a baby, with a brain to match. * Credited to my friend fqzeng.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(especially if you do this in public) Child: Would you still love me if I did something bad? Parent: Yes, of course. Child: I mean something REALLY bad. Parent: Of course... Child: No, I mean something REALLY really bad. Parent: No... Child: No, really. Something REALLY really really- Parent: ALL RIGHT! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO!!!???!!!???!!!???!!!???111///111///111///111/// Child: (Innocently) Nothing, why?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are just a few of those typical sexist jokes- they make me chuckle ( or groan) so ya know- I''m a girl : ) *what''s worse than a male chauvinist pig? - A woman who won''t do what she''s told. *I married Mrs. Right- I just wish I''d known her first name was Always * * How many men does it take to open a beer? -None. It should be open by thetime she brings it * What is the best way to always remember your wife''s birthday? - Forget it once', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mama''s so fat when she went to a hotel she asked for a water bed and they just covered up the pool with a blanket and said no divers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The accountant''s prayer: "Lord, help me be more relaxed about insignificant details, starting tomorrow at 10.53:16 am, Eastern Daylight Saving Time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The accountant was visiting the Museum of Natural History and said to the person standing next to him, "That dinosaur is two billion years and ten months old." "How did you get such exact information?" "I was here ten months ago and the guide said the dinosaur was two billion years old."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Feeling lost and adrift? Gain inner peace by learning the way of the Homer Simpson... Here are some Homeric jewels to live by: "The answers to life''s problems aren''t at the bottom of the bottle. They''re on TV. "What''s the point of going out? We''re just going to end up back here anyway." "Trying is the first step toward failure." "You can''t keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once and move on." "Doughnuts. Is there anything they can''t do?" "The three little sentences that will get you through life. No. 1: Cover for me. No. 2: Oh, good idea, boss. No. 3: It was like that when I got here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Somebody complimented on my driving today, a blonde told her friend, "I found a note on my windshield that said''Parking Fine''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gladiator was having a rough day at the arena-his opponent had sliced off both of his arms. Nevertheless, he fought on, kicking and biting as furiously as he could. But when his opponent lopped off both feet, the gladiator had no choice but to give up. He was now both unarmed and defeated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Irvin is driving down the freeway to go to work when his cell phone rings. It''s his wife: "Irving,I just heard on the news that there''s a car going down the freeway in the wrong direction. Please try to be careful." "It''s true,"Irving replies,"But not just one car- there are hundreds of them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married couple, both 60 years old, were celebrating their 35th anniversary. During their party, a fairy appeared to congratulate them and grant them each one wish. The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her wand and POOF--the wife had tickets in her hand for a world cruise. Next, the fairy asked the husband what he wanted. He said, "I wish I had a wife 30 years younger than me." So the fairy picked up her wand and POOF -- the husband was 90.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man phoned up an exclusive escort agency and asked for a woman. "No problem," said the receptionist. "There''s just one thing," said the man,"she has to be 6'' 6" tall and weigh 48lbs." "Mmm,let me see --yes we can do that for you, but it will be expensive," said the receptionist. "That''s o.k," said the man. "When do you want her?". "Tomorrow night at 7pm," said the man. The next night the doorbell rings and a painfully thin 6'' 6" black woman is standing on his doorstep. "Come in, take off all your clothes and go down on all fours," said the man. She complies with his request. He opens the kitchen door and a scrawny black labrador emerges. The woman thinks, "Oh shit, what have I let myself in for?" The man points at his dog and says, "Now that''s what you''ll look like if you don''t eat all your dog food."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many teachers does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to turn it the other to grade the person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do blondes drive VWs ? A: Because they can''t spell PORSCHE', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After class ends a 1st grader goes up to his teacher and says, "I don''t mean to scare you Teacher but my parents said that if I keep getting bad grades, then..." "Somebody''s gonna get a spanking." (nodnod)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so skinny she can hula-hoop with a cheerio.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your day is bad if your twin sister forgot your birthday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb that when we told her it was a serial killer on the loose she went and locked all the boxes of cereal up in the cabinet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you''re a redneck? If you go to a cousin''s wedding looking for a girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she went on a sea food diet - she see food and eat it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('knock-knock. who''s there? yo mama. yo mama who? this is yo mama stop playing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend''s mom is so fat I was upstairs and when she fell I ran down screaming, "EARTHQUAKE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between snow men and snow women? Snow BALLS! (Ding dong kind)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she went to commit suicide and tried to jump out her basement window.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so fat she has her own area code.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are some more for you... Yo momma''s so stupid she failed a survey. Yo momma''s so stupid she tried to commit suicide by jumping off a building and she got lost on the way down. Yo momma''s so stupid I saw her jumping up and down, and she said she forgot to shake the medicine before she took it. Yo momma''s so stupid she tried to drown a fish. Yo momma''s so stupid she got hit by a cup and told the police she was mugged. That''s all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix cigarettes in hot water? A soggy butt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back? 2.Yeah, I used to cut class a lot too. 3.Let me smell that shirt-don''t worry, its good for another week. 4.Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I''ll be glad to feed him and walk him every day. 5.That outfit isn''t sexy enough, here, unbutton your blouse. 6.Why don''t you hitchhike? It would be totally cheaper. 7.The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It''s not like I''m running a prison around here. 8.Don''t clean your room often; It makes the rest of the house look bad. 9.Can I borrow your new speed-metal CDs? 10.Naw, you don''t have to call me, I''ll eventually figure out what to do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there so few amusement parks in Japan? Because they aren''t tall enough to ride them!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his doctor are discussing a surgery the man will soon undergo. The doctor asks if there are any last questions. "Doctor, will I be able to play my violin after this surgery?" "Of course! Why would you think you couldn''t?" "I couldn''t play it before."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Sue. Sue who? I''ll sue you if ya don''t let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day the zoo-keeper noticed that the orangutan was reading two books: the Bible and Darwin''s Origin of Species. Surprised, he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books?" "Well," said the orangutan, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother''s keeper or my keeper''s brother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher decides to have Career Day in her class. She asks each student to tell the class what their father''s job is, spell it, and then explain what they do. Mary stands up and says, "My father is a policeman. P -O-L-I-C-E-M-A-N. He puts bad people in jail and keeps us all safe." Sue stands up next and says, "My father is a doctor. D-O-C-T-O-R. He helps sick people get better." Bobby is next. He stands up and says, "My father is a pharmacist. F...F-R..." The teacher tells Bobby to sit down and try to figure it out and moves on to the next kid. Johnny stands up next and says, "My father is a bookie. B-O-O-K-I-E. He''d give you 10-1 odds that Bobby is never going to spell ''pharmacist.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you tell if a blonde has stolen your bike? A: She''s running away with it under her arm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy sits down at the bar, and starts telling the bartendar, "I''ve been married for 12 years now and I want some variety. I''m sick of the same old thing! I want something different!" The bartendar says, "12 years thats a long time, you don''t want to do anything stupid! Hell, if ya want something different just flip her over!" The man replies, "What? And have a houseful of kids!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Indian man made a painting with the sun above a beach. He proudly displayed his painting. When people marvel at his work and asked, "What''s it called?" He said, "Sun of a Beach."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the tree that made an Ash of itself?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb, that when we told her it was chilly outside she ran out with a bowl and a spoon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lonely female crab was walking down the beach one evening when she noticed a male crab coming toward herbut he was walking straight and not sideways! Impressed by his talent, she decided to marry him immediately. The next morning she noticed him walking sideways like any ordinary crab! She asked, "What happened? Yesterday you were able to walk straight!" He answered "What?! I can''t get that drunk every day!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you serve food in space? A: On flying saucers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walked up to this little boy and asked what was closer, ( it was a joke) the moon or the Cayman Islands. The little boy said, "The moon, because you can''t see the Caymen Islands, but you can see the moon." The guy decided to show some people on the streets this fine genius. That same day, the guy shouted out, "Listen to the genius. Once the guy asked which was closer, the moon or the Cayman Islands, the little boy said " The Cayman Islands." "Why do you think that?" the guy asked. the boy said "Yesterday, I saw some people from the Cayman Islands. Have YOU ever seen some one from the moon? I sure haven''t."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why was Moses the most wicked man? A. He broke all 10 Commandments at once. Q. What animal could Noah not trust? A. The cheetah. Q. What kind of lights did Noah use on the ark? A. Flood lights.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood curdling scream is heard from the bathroom. A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar. The bartender goes into the bathroom to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What''s all the screaming about in there? You''re scaring the customers!" "I''m just sitting here on the toilet and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my testicles." With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in and says..."You idiot! You''re sitting on the mop bucket!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Exam Question: Define courage. Student Answer: This is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There lived a Chinese and an American in a hotel. One day, the Chinese felt thirsty, so he decided to get a drink of water. So he went to the public refrigerator, took a can of coke, and drank it. Then he wanted to go pee, so he peed in the can, closed the cap, put it back in the fridge, and hid in a corner. The American came a few minutes later. He took the can, took a sip, and then the Chinese man popped out from his hiding place and said: "Me Chinese, "Me play joke, "Me go pee-pee in your coke!" *SOCK*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three women a brunette, a woman with jet black hair, and a blonde were pregnant and at the doctors'' office to find out the sex of their babies. The nurse called for the brunette and she went into the office. She came out very happy and said, "My husband and I had sex standing up and I''m having a girl!" The women with jet black hair was called and went into the office. She came out very happily and said, "My husband and I had sex lying down, and I''m having a boy!" Next the blonde was called and went into the office. She soon ran back out crying. The other two women asked her what was wrong. The blond sobbed, "I''m having puppies!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two carrots are walking down the street one day when a car suddenly comes flying around the corner and runs one of them over. At the hospital, the doctor says to the other carrot, "I have good news and bad news. The good news is your friend is going to live. The bad news is he''ll be a vegetable for the rest of his life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Yoda! Yoda who? Yo-da door''s stuck! Lemme in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At weddings old people poke me and say, "You''re next!" At funerals, I do the same.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she used pillowcases for socks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friend 1:"Yeh,you are looking too fat." Friend 2:"You are looking too old." Friend 1:"I am not old." Friend 2:"Then, I am not too fat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandfather always said, "Don''t watch your money; watch your health." So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to apply for a job. After filling out all of his applications, he waited anxiously for the outcome. The employer read all his applications and said, "We have an opening for people like you." "Oh, great," he said, "What is it?" "It''s called the door!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. If this is tea, please bring me some coffee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have? A. Very large hands. Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand? A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand. Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep? A. No Problems , He sleeps at night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. The Bay of Bengal is in which state? A. Liquid Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will get Wet or Sink as simple as that. Q. What looks like half of an apple ? A. The other half. Q. What happened when the wheel was invented? A. It caused a revolution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind, "If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you." The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. He was astonished. He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted, "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you, and you will die." The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him. The man asked, "Who are you?" "I am your guardian angel," the voice answered. "Oh, yeah?" the man asked. "Then where the hell were you when I got married?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information?" "To save lives," the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture. A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted. "It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Joey, your behavior is terrible! How many more times am I going to have to keep you in after school? Joey: 97. Teacher: 97? Joey: Yeah. That''s how many days are left until the summer holidays.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What goes 99-clump, 99-clump, 99-clump? A centipede with a wooden leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Swen. Swen who? Swen are you going let me in!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER: Why are you late? L-JOHNY: Because of the sign. TEACHER: What sign? L-JOHNY: "School Ahead, Go Slow." TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water? L-JOHNY: "HIJKLMNO"!! TEACHER: What are you talking about? L-JOHNY: Yesterday you only said it''s H to O!!!! TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his father''s Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn''t punish him?" L-JOHNY: "Because George still had the axe in his hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday, I walked into a pet store. When I walked to the back of the store, I saw an interesting parrot. The parrot had a ribbon on either foot. There was a red ribbon on his left foot, and a blue ribbon on his right foot. As I was wondering what the ribbons were for, the store owner walked up to me. He told me that if I pulled the red ribbon, the parrot would sing the "Star Spangled Banner," and the parrot did. He then told me that if you pulled the blue ribbon, the parrot would sing, "God Bless America," and it did. Interested, I asked the store owner, "What will it do when I pull both ribbons at the same time?" The parrot then yelled, "I''ll fall off my perch, stupid!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The closest you''ve ever come to a brainstorm is a light drizzle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blond think the last 2 words of the national anthem are? Play ball!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister delivered a sermon in 10 minutes one Sunday morning, which was about half the usual length of his sermons. He explained, "I regret to inform you that my dog, who is very fond of eating paper, ate that portion of my sermon which I was unable to deliver this morning." After the service, a visitor from another church shook hands with the preacher and said, "Reverend, if that dog of yours has any pups, I want to give one to my minister."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Hannibal Lecter call Britney Spears? Dinner at Hooters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lady : Is this my train? Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company. Lady : Don''t try to be funny. I mean, can I take this train to Kuala Lumpur? Station Master : No Madam, I''m afraid it''s too heavy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oh, what a shame. It looks like the Ugly Fairy kissed you on both cheeks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the hardest part of skydiving? The ground!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a porcupine with a shark? Far far away!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.) That in school, getting a zero for a grade seems better than getting a 20 or a 30. 2.) That when you are hungry, you look in the refrigerator constantly, even though you know there''s nothing to eat in there. 3.) That ketchup has TONS of sugar? What''s up with that? 4.) That when you vacuum and there''s a piece of lint or something on the floor that''s too big to suck up with the vacuum cleaner, instead of picking it up, you just sit there rolling the vacuum over and over it hoping it will suck it up?? 5.) That when you think of something funny and someone else says,"What''s so funny?" You say,"It''s a long story" when really it isn''t?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican and an Iraqi terrorist are in a car. Who''s driving? Answer: The police.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Analogy of sex: Insert the ''quarter'' into the ''vending machine'' and then the ''gumball'' comes out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The forgien exchanged students Jose, Doron, and Krono didn''t know any English. So their teacher asked them to go find some words. Jose goes to the airport and sees a plane. "Waz dat?" he asks. "That''s a plane taking off," the pilot said. "Take off!" he says. Doron goes to the zoo and sees a zebra. "Waz dat?" he asks. "That''s a zebra," a lady tells him. "Ze''bra!" he says. Krono goes to the hospital and sees a new baby. "Waz dat?" he asks. "That''s my baby," the mother said. "Be''be!" he says. The next day in class, they say all the words together. "Take off ze bra bebe!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s wrong with you? you asked a very dumb guy that was taking your order at the newest resturant in town. "The doctor doesn''t know yet, hehe (snort)."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken pox cross the road? He was afraid if he stayed he would be spotted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do the kids of dentists get around the neighborhood? On Molar-Skates', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What movie is really the sequel to April Fools? The May-Tricks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Samurai Jack''s favorite fish? Swordfish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What monster was created on April 1? Pranken-stien', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Frayed. Frayed who? Frayed no one''s going to answer the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of teenagers craving something sweet drove to the nearest Baskin-Robbins. They bought ice cream cones and returned to their car to be comfortable. As they settled back to enjoy themselves, two ravens landed on the front hood and began to caw and flutter, and to peck at the windshield. The young man finally figured out what they wanted. He finished his ice cream, opened the window, and put his empty cone on the hood. The birds immediately settled down to eat. "You''re wonderful," said his girlfriend. "How did you ever think of that?" "Nothing to it," he replied. "It was just a case of stilling two birds with one cone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sailor trying to sneak back to his ship about 3 o''clock in the morning was spotted by a chief petty officer who ordered him to explain his tardiness. The lame explanation didn''t work. "Take this broom and sweep every link on this anchor chain by morning or it''s the brig for you," the chief said. The sailor began to sweep, but a tern landed on the broom handle and he couldn''t continue. He yelled at the bird, but it didn''t budge. He finally plucked it off the broom and gave it a toss. But the bird came right back and again landed on the handle. Over and over, the same routine was repeated. A toss, one sweep, and the bird was back. When morning came, the chief also was back. "What have you been doing all night? This chain is no cleaner than when you started!" "Honest, chief," said the sailor, "I tossed a tern all night and couldn''t sweep a link."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Ward goes to the doctor''s office to collect her husband''s test results. The lab tech says to her, "I''m sorry, ma''am, but there has been a big mix-up and we have a problem. When we sent your husband''s samples to the lab, the samples from another Mr. Ward were sent as well and we are now uncertain which one is your husband''s. Frankly, it is either bad or terrible." "What do you mean?" Mrs. Ward asked. "Well, one has tested positive for Alzheimer''s and the other for AIDS. We can''t tell which is your husband." "That''s terrible! Can we do the test over?" questioned Mrs. Ward. "Normally, yes.But Medicare won''t pay for these expensive tests more than once." "Well, what am I supposed to do now?" "The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don''t sleep with him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack locked up his bar and headed home. He''d been asleep a few minutes when the telephone rang. "What time do you open in the morning?" he heard an obviously inebriated man inquire. Furious, Jack slammed the phone down and went back to sleep. But the same guy called again. " You might as well stop calling," Jack shouted." There''s no way I''m letting a drunk like you into my bar!" "I don''t want to get in," the caller interjected."I want to get out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a prince who was under a terrible spell. He could only say one word per year. Then one day, he saw a beautiful princess. He fell in love with her. He vowed to ask her hand in marriage. However, because of the spell, he had to wait for 7 whole years to propose. On the starting of the 8th year, the prince went to the princess'' castle. Knelt down in front of her and said, "I love you, will you marry me?" The princess tossed her enchanting golden hair, straightened her crown, parted her cherry-red lovely lips and said, "I''m sorry, I didn''t hear that. What did you say?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That master detective, Sherlock Holmes, was sitting on his chair beside the fireplace calmly reading a book when suddenly, his good partner, Dr. Watson came in. Sherlock Holmes looked at his friend and smiled, saying, "Why, Dr. Watson, don''t you think the weather is a bit hot for you to be wearing your red flannel underwear?" Dr. Watson was shocked by this incredible and wonderful logic. "My good man," he gasped, "How did you know I was wearing my red flannel underwear?" Holmes smiled wider and put down his book. He explained, "Elementary, my dear Watson. You forgot to put your pants on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for his company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, "Father, me dog is dead. Could ya'' be sayin'' a mass for the poor creature?" Father Patrick replied, "I''m afraid not; we cannot have services for an animal in the church, but there are some Baptists down the lane, and there''s no tellin'' what they believe. Maybe they''ll do something for the creature." Muldoon said, "I''ll go right away, Father. Do ya'' think $5,000 is enough to donate for the service?" Father Patrick exclaimed, "Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus! Why didn''t ya'' tell me the dog was Catholic?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Peyton Manning dies and goes to heaven. Upon arrival, he''s given a nice sized house, and a few of his trophies and some Colts apparel is set up around the house to honor his days as a QB. One day, as he''s walking along the golden streets, he hears the news that Ben Roethlisberger has died. As he looks up, he sees this ridiculously large mansion - a big, BIG mansion. The building is completely decked out and covered in Ben Roethlisberger banners and flags and paraphanelia. Peyton is a little put out, so he goes to see God. "God," he says when he meets him, "I don''t think this is very fair. I mean, I WAS the better quarterback. Just look at my record and my stats! Do you think it''s fair that he gets all that and I just get a little house?" God simply smiles and chuckles a little before shaking his head. "Peyt," he says, "That''s not Ben Roethlisberger''s house. That''s MY house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The skeleton walked into the bar and asked, "Can I have a beer and a mop?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Tennessee? What Arkansas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three Texas surgeons were playing golf together and discussing surgeries they had performed. One of them said, "I''m the best surgeon in Texas. A concert pianist lost seven fingers in an accident; I reattached them, and eight months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England." One of the others said, "That''s nothing: a young man lost both arms and legs in an accident; I reattached them, and two years later he won a gold medal in field events in the Olympics." The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a cowboy who was high on cocaine and alcohol rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the horse''s ass and a cowboy hat. Now he''s president of the United States."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the little boy''s first time on an airplane. He was so excited. When the airplane engines started, the little boy closed his eyes and counted to 100. Then he opened his eyes and peered outside. Pointing, he said to the woman next to him, "See those tiny people down there? They are just like ants!" The woman looked at what he was pointing and remarked, "They are ants. We haven''t left the ground yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('15 Steps to Build a campfire. 1. Split dead limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers. 2. Bandage left thumb. 3. Chop other fragments into smaller fragments. 4. Bandage left foot. 5. Make structure of slivers(including those embedded in hand). 6. Light match. 7. Light match. 8. Repeat "a scout is cheerful," and light match. 9. Apply match to slivers, add wood fragments, and blow gently into base of flames. 10. Apply Burn ointment to nose. 11. When fire is burning, collect more wood. 12. Upon discovery that fire has gone out during your absence, soak wood with liquid from can labeled "kerosene." 13. Treat face and arms for second degree burns, and relabel your can to read "gasoline." 14. When fire is burning well, add all remaining wood. 15. When thunderstorm has passed, repeat steps 1 through 14.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of cheese is not yours? Nacho cheese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican was finally caught on the borderline of the US by an American cop. The Mexican begged, "Pleese, siir. I muss stay here in America. I muss!" But the American still wasn''t convinced. So, the Mexican pleaded more and more with very bad English. At last, the cop, assuming the Mexican''s English couldn''t get any worst, said to the Mexican, "I will let you stay if you can use 3 words in one sentence." The Mexican thought for a while, and replied, "Is all right. I say. I say." The cop said, "The words are: Green, pink and yellow." After a few seconds of consideration, the Mexican responded, "Da phone - it rang: Green, green, green. I pink it up and sez, ''yellow?''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men or women were more trustworthy. ''No woman,'' said one man, scornfully, ''can keep a secret.'' ''I don''t know about that,'' answered a blonde woman guest. ''I have kept my age a secret since I was twenty-one.'' ''You''ll let it out some day,'' the man insisted. ''I hardly think so!'' responded the blonde lady. ''When a woman has kept a secret for twenty-seven years, she can keep it forever.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All the numbers went to a party and numbers being what they are, all the evens stayed around each other and all the odds did the same and neither group interacted with each other. Whilst two was chatting to four he noticed zero was on his own in the corner and suggested to four that because zero is sort of even he should be encouraged to mix with even numbers - four agreed. So off went two to invite zero into their little group. "Would you like to join our little group" enquired two, to which zero replied "I have nothing to add!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The number you have dialed is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it? A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSC Topper) Q. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it? A. No time at all, as it has already been built. (UPSC 23 Rank Opted for IFS) Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have? A. Very large hands. (Good one) (UPSC 11 Rank Opted for IPS)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the blonde say when she looked in the box of cheerios? A: Oh look, donut seeds!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An astronaut in space was asked by a reporter, "How do you feel?" "How would you feel," the astronout replied, "if you were stuck here, on top of 20,000 parts each one supplied by the lowest bidder?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineer, a mathmatician and an arts graduate were given the task of finding the height of a church steeple (the first to get the correct solution wins a $1000). The engineer tried to remember things about differential pressures, but resorted to climbing the steeple and lowering a string on a plumb bob until it touched the ground and then climbed down and measured the length of the string. The Mathematician layed out a reference line, measured the angle to the top of the steeple from both ends and worked out the height by trigonometry. However, the arts graduate won the prize. He bought the vicar a beer in the local pub and he told him how high the church steeple was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three freshman engineering students were sitting around talking between classes, when one brought up the question of who designed the human body. One of the students insisted that the human body must have been designed by an electrical engineer because of the perfection of the nerves and synapses. Another disagreed, and exclaimed that it had to have been a mechanical engineer who designed the human body. The system of levers and pullies is ingenious. "No," the third student said. "You''re both wrong. The human body was designed by an architect. Who else but an architect would have put a toxic waste line through a recreation area?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A communication technician drafted by the army was at a firing range. At the range, he was given some instruction, a rifle and 50 rounds. He fired several shots at the target. The report came from the target area that all attempts had completely missed the target. The technician looked at his weapon, and then at the target. He looked at the weapon again, and then at the target again. He then put his finger over the end of the rifle barrel and squeezed the trigger with his other hand. The end of his finger was blown off, whereupon he yelled toward the target area: "It''s leaving here just fine, the trouble must be at your end!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A salesman, and engineer, and a technician are driving in a car when, just outside of town, they get a flat tire. The three of them get out of the car and scratch their heads. The salesman says, "Maybe I should walk into town and get us a new tire. I know that I can bargain with the man at the parts store and get us a great deal." The engineer stops him, saying, "No, before you do that, we''ll have to do some computations, figuring the grade of the road, the asphalt temperature, and the average rate of speed we will be traveling to know what kind of tire you should buy." The technician laughs and shakes his head. "No, no, no! What''s wrong with you guys? Hell, we have a spare tire in the trunk - now all we have to do is start swapping tires until we find the flat one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, when she went to the house of mirrors, it collapsed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas so old her birth certificate says "EXPIRED"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant? He forgot to wrap the "Whopper"!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Angie and John were in court after deciding their divorce when the problem of ''who gets to keep the kid'' started to arise. Angie exclaimed that the child was hers since she could take care of the kid better than her ''wretched'' husband. But the judge wanted to hear John''s reason of why he should keep the baby. After thinking for sometime, John said, "Your honor, let me ask you a question: if you put a dollar inside a vending machine and a coke comes out, does this coke belong to you or does it belong to the vending machine?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('His wife had been killed in an accident and the police were questioning Mr Finnegan. "Did she say anything before she died?" asked the sergeant. "She spoke without interruption for about forty years," said the Irishman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her friend were tracing their names from stencils to cut out. When they ran out of room, the blonde turned the paper over and said,"Hey, there''s lots more room on this side!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a woodpecker without a beak? A headbanger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Violets are blue. Yo momma is ugly, And she looks just like you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was late to school on the first day, and his new teacher asked, "What is your name young man?" The boy replied," Michael Gay." The teacher said," Why are you calling a kid gay? What is your name boy?" The boy said, "Michael Gay!" The teacher said," That''s ENOUGH young man. Go to the principal''s office. THIS SECOND!" The principal saw him and asked him," What is your name young man?" The boy says, " Michael Gay." The principal asks," Why are you calling a gay?" And what is your name?" The boy gets angry and says, "Michael Gay!" The principal says, "Thats it young man, you''re suspended! The boy got home and his mother asked," Why are you in trouble?" The boy says, "Michael Gay." The mother says, "I know your name, dear, why are you in trouble?" The boy says," MICHAEL GAY!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: Haven''t we been on a couple dates before? Woman: Couldn''t have been. I don''t make the same mistake twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BOB- We were learning about fractions today in math class. JOE- Oh, really? What did you learn? BOB- One half of what I was supposed to!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between MJ and Mr. Potato Head? MJ has more noses. How are MJ and a Wal-Mart bag alike? They''re both plastic and hazardous to children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was playing internet games on Yahoo. Finding it hilarious, he had named himself "emilycheesehotchick". One time, while playing pool, his opponent messaged to him "Want to have cyber sex...?" Curiousity took over him, and so he replied "Sure!". Thus followed a hot and mostly one-sided cyber sex, when all of a sudden, his mother came into the room. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" asked his mother. "I...I....I''m having cybersex with someone on Yahoo..." he replied. The mother paused...and then asked, "Are you emilycheesehotchick...?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the dick say to the condom? Cover me, I''m goin in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Given m = money, e = evil, t = time and w = women, prove that women are evil (women = evil) 1. m = e ^ (1/2) (money is the root of all evil) 2. t = m (time is money) 3. w = t * m (women are the product of time and money) 4. w = m ^ 2 (substitution) 5. w = {e ^ (1/2)} ^ 2 (substitution) 6. w = e Proven by mathematics - women are evil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which comes first, Ben-Gay or Preparation H? Ben-Gay. After you have been gay, you''ll need the Preparation H.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the blonde say when she crossed the road? A: Hey! How''d I get over here?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time in India, the Bengal tiger was on the brink of extinction, due to a vigorous hunting season. So, Prince Naranjahah ordered that no one shall kill another Bengal. Well, this led to the over abundance in zoos and animal shelters, and one day, the tigers broke loose and started attacking the citizens. The citizens then revolted and overthrew the Prince''s rule. This is the first known instance of the reign being called on account of the game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a brick. She''s flat on all sides and gets laid all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently, Today Tonight have held a survey. The results indicate that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the population.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock who''s there? Ivanna Ivanna who? Ivanna come in, dammit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little johnny walked into a club where people were doing the macarena. He watched them for a while, and asked someone: "What are you guys doing? Searching for your wallets?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that when she went out dressed in green she got arrested for driving a tank.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Humpty dumpty go to the shrink? Cause he was half cracked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A middle school student was working at a shop for his after-school job. He had on a Dairy Queen shirt. A kindergarten student walked up to him and said, "Wow, I have 3 of those shirts! You must be cheap!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A distraught patient phoned her doctor''s office. "Is it true," the woman wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?" "Yes, I''m afraid so," the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence before the woman continued, "I''m wondering, then, just how serious my condition is, because this prescription is marked ''NO REFILLS.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come people are willing to get up off their butts to search the whole room for the remote, because they refuse to get up and change channels manually?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once were two babies both in the same room, with their cribs next to each other. After their mom tucked the babies in for sleep, one baby went to the other baby and said, "I can tell if you are a girl or a boy." The other baby said, "OK, what am I then?" The baby went under the other babies blanket and came up a minute later, and said with a grin on his face, "You are a girl and I am a boy." The second baby asked, "And how do you know that?" The baby replied, "I know because you have pink slippers and I have blue slippers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a joke song ok "I pledge allegiance to the flag, Micheal Jackson is a fag. He used to play with little toys, but now he plays with little boys."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, she looked at me and my eyes burned off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich Chinese family (a 36 year old dad, a 36 year old mom, and a 2 year old son) was flying in their private jet. It ran out of fuel, and there were only two parachutes. The parents decided they could always have another son, so they grabbed the parachutes and jumped off. When they got home, they saw their son sitting on their porch. "How the hell did you get here? And before us?" the dad said, confused. The little boy stood up and said, "Me Chinese, me think fast, me hold on to daddy''s ass. He make fart, I go zoom, that''s how I get home so soon!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde have tire tracks on her back? A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON''T WALK"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard they were going to name a highway after Willie Nelson in Texas... But be Warned: When taking this highway look out for pot holes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you here about the new redneck Barbie doll? It comes with twelve kids, aids, and a welfare check.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning, during breakfast, I say, "I had the strangest dream. It was about aliens." My mother asks, "What are aliens?" My father asks, "What kind?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma can be used as a weapon: she''s so ugly, she''ll blind house robbers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from KFC', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From the Northwest Florida Daily News comes this story of a Crestview couple who drove their car to Wal-Mart, only to have their car break down in the parking lot. The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car in the lot. The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection, she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones. Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand UP his shorts, and tucked everything back into place. On regaining her feet, she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by. The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his forehead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how young children have that special hobby of always asking "Why?" Well, one day I went to the bank to pay some bills, and my 4-year-old daughter did just so. "Mommy, why are we coming here?" "So mommy can pay some bills." "Why?" "So that we can keep our house." "Why?" "So that we won''t have to live on the streets." "Why?" "Because that''s what will happen if we don''t pay for our house." "Why?" "Because that''s the way it goes." "Why?" "Why do you keeping asking ''why?''." "...why?" "You''re being a nuisance." "Why?" "Because you got that from your father." "Why?" "Because your father is a nuisance." "Why?" "I don''t know, you go ask HIM and then tell me why."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder who? Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Pencil. Pencil who? Pencil fall down if you don''t wear a belt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Chugga Chugga Chooch Chugga Chugga Chooch Who? Wheeee!! A train! All aboard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s feet are so ashy she leaves white footprints. Yo Momma''s house is so nasty the roaches moved out. Yo Momma''s hair is so short it''s ingrown. I would stay and chat, but yo momma''s water bowl is empty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton went in for her yearly check-up. When it was finished, she asked her gynecologist how everything was. He said he was pleased and that she was in great shape, and that she was pregnant. "No way!" she exclaimed, but he assured her she was most definitely pregnant. She stormed out of the examining room, grabbed the receptionist''s phone and dialed the private line in the Oval Office. When Bill answered the phone, she shouted, "I can''t believe it! I''m pregnant! You got me pregnant!" The president didn''t say anything, and she screamed, "Didn''t you hear me?? I''m pregnant! You got me pregnant!" Hesitantly, the president asked, "Um...who IS this?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wise man once said. I Don''t know ask A Girl! A wise man Once Said. Life sucks and then we die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t lose my mind! I sold it on Ebay...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For all of you who say I need anger management... Just to let you know, if I could control my anger, I''d destroy you with it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was seen on a bulletin board at a grocery store: "I have kidnapped myself. Please give me $2,000,000 and 5 tacos or you will never see me again." And a different one: "I''m missing, so I have gone to look for myself. If I come back here before I do, please keep me safe here until I return. Thanks!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We and You is friends. You smile, We smile..... You hurt, We hurt.... You cry, We cry... You jump off a bridge... We gonna miss you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a hardy Indiana rainstorm filled all the potholes in the streets and alleys, a young mother watched her two little boys playing in the puddle through her kitchen window. The older of the two, a five year old lad, grabbed his sibling by the back of his head and shoved his face into the water hole. As the boy recovered and stood laughing and dripping, the mother runs to the yard in a panic. "Why on earth did you do that to your little brother?!" she says as she shook the older boy in anger. "We were just playing ''church'' mommy," he said. "I was baptizing him in the name of the Father, the Son and in the hole-he-goes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are actual bumper stickers that were found on people''s cars: The proctologist called; they found your head. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke off. Guys; just because you have one, doesn''t mean you have to be one. If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you. Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them. Don''t like my driving? Then quit watching me. Save your breath. You''ll need it to blow up your date. Some people just don''t know how to drive. I call these people "Everybody But Me," Try not to let your mind wander, it''s too small, it''ll get lost. Welcome to America! Now, learn to speak English.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Tommy ran to his dad and said "Daddy, daddy! Watch me count." Tommy holds up his right hand, and, touching each finger, counts to five. "One, two, three, four, five." "Good!" his dad exclaimed. "Can you count higher?" Tommy pauses to think for a minute, then stretches his hand higher up in the air, past his head. "One, two, three, four, five..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest, a minister and a guru sat discussing the best positions for prayer while a telephone repairman worked nearby. "Kneeling is definitely the best way to pray," the priest said. "No," said the minister. "I get the best results standing with my hands outstretched to Heaven." "You''re both wrong," the guru said. "The most effective prayer position is lying down on the floor." The repairman could contain himself no longer. "Hey, fellas," he interrupted, "The best prayin'' I ever did was when I was hangin'' upside down from a telephone pole."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Could you fax me your photo very very urgently? Mind you it''s really very very urgent, damn serious and very important ..... I''m playing cards and we''ve misplaced the JOKER.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Dr. Ruth, I''m writing to tell you my problem. It seems I have been married to a sex maniac for the past 22 years. He makes love to me regardless of what I am doing. Ironing, washing dishes, etc. I should like to know if there is anything thet yiu vwn fi gue hduuen jsy jjeh jduue jheyhdu judgge jji jjie. njdsfhu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PLEASE DON''T SMOKE IN MY OFFICE! I enjoy sex more than you enjoy smoking but you don''t see me screwing in your office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What she says: Any ring is fine, as long as I have you. What she''s thinking: No diamond? How cheap! I''ll make his life a living hell! I''ll put poison in his coffee! I''ll cut his brake lines! Get her a diamond, idiot!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have the typical observant wife. One evening after dinner, she handed me a bottle of that Rogaine hair restorer. I told her while I was indeed starting to thin out some, I didn''t really think I needed hair restorer yet. She said, "Oh. It''s not for you, it''s for your secretary, she seems to be losing quite a bit of her hair on your jacket."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear brother, I smile because you are my brother. I laugh because there is absolutely nothing you can do about it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not against Avril Lavigne or anything, I like her, but I heard this, and it was pretty funny. This is the changed lyric to the chorus of Complicated: "Why''d you have to go and make me so constipated? You see the way I''m scrunching up my pitiful face when I''m on the toilet, And during this I - I push, and I strain, and I sweat, and I pray, Dear Lord, that you''ll let it come out; Sooner or later I''ll have to leave the bathroom, Yeah, yeah, yeah..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are phrases found on funny T-shirts: *(camoflauge) Ha! Now you can''t see me! * He did it --> *The leprechauns are after my stash. *I do what the voices tell me to do... *Not the brightest crayon in the box, are we? *See no homework, Speak no homework, Hear no homework, DO NO HOMEWORK. *I bet you were an ugly baby. *(Picture of Simpsons on it) I see dumb people... *I didn''t do it. *(Scribbles all over it) Don''t drink and draw. *(Picture of skunk) Silent but deadly... *He farted --> *(Picture of gas station) I have gas! *(Squirrels) Protect your nuts. *I''m out of bed and dressed, what more do you want? *Help! I talk too much! *(Upside down) If you can read this, please send me back to the bar... *The closest I got to an 86% average in college was my alcohol blood level. *My parents think I''m in school *My girlfriend thinks I''m out of town *FOR SALE *(Big smilie) I''m no longer a danger to society!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Batman once wrote on the wall, "Superman is a wimp." The next day, Superman wrote "Batman is Bruce Wayne."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A zebra had died and when he got to Heaven he asked the guard, out of curiosity, if he was white with black strips or black with white strips. The guard said that he would see God roaming around Heaven and the zebra could ask Him. A couple weeks later he finally sees God and asks, "Out of curiosity, am I white with black stripes or black with white strips." God answered, "You are what your are." The zebra was puzzled, but went along anyway. A few days later the zebra sees the guard again. The guard said, "So did you see God? What did he say?" The zebra replied, "Well, he said ''You are what are what your are.''" The guard goes, "Oh, then it means that you are white with black stripes." The zebra asked, "How do you know?" The guard answered, "If you were black with white stripes, He would have said ''You is what you is''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Announcer, at a diving competition: "Ladies and gentlemen, we have both good and bad news to announce. The good news is that the dive just performed was fantastic and the judges have managed to give it a full score of ten. The bad news is... there was no water in the pool."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly gentleman went to see his doctor and asked for a prescription of Viagra. The doctor said, "That''s no problem. How many do you want?" The man answered, "Just a few, maybe 4, but cut each one in 4 pieces." The doctor said, "That won''t do you any good." The elderly gentleman said, "That''s all right. I don''t need them for sex any more as I am over 90 years old. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don''t pee on my shoes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the penny become angry with the nickel? Because the nickel was a "penny pincher".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one tradesman say to another? I hope you have a "barter" day tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and a her daughter go to a restaurant for breakfast to celebrate her birthday. The restaurant is known for its imported cheeses. The mother asks, "Would you like some cheese, my angel?" The little girl says,"Sure, but can you take out the holes in the cheese?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A famous blonde actress and her husband are going to meet an American. However, her husband has forgotten the young man''s name. Later, the young man asks for an autograph. She asks, trying to find his name out, "How do you spell your name?" Upon hearing this, he said,"B-E-N A long time ago when I saw your first play on Broadway and got an autograph, you knew how to spell it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? No one. No one who? No one to tell you who''s here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Little Jimmy has a dentist appointment. The appointment is during 7:20 to 8:20, which is the first hour of Little Jimmy''s school. The appointment went fine, but Little Jimmy''s mom had to get up from bed early to take Little Jimmy to his appointment, so she is a little tired. Little Jimmy''s mother gives him a note, and she instructs him to give the note to his teacher. Little Jimmy doesn''t look at the note, then when he gets into his classroom, he hands the note to his teacher, just as his mother had instructed. His teacher took the note, took a glance at it, then fainted. Little Jimmy and his classmates ran over to her to look at the note to see what all the commotion was. The note read, "Little Jimmy had a dentist appointment today. I''m sorry for his absence. Please let him be executed at school today. Signed, Tara Fox."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde bury her walkman? Because the batteries were dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a stereotypical blonde spell "farm"? E-I-E-I-O', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are some real people''s names, and what they grew up to be. They are all true: 1.) Iccolo Miccolo played the piccolo for the Los Angeles Philharmonic Orchestra. 2.) H.M. Balmer was a funeral director in Fort Collins, Colorado. 3.) Miss Birdie Snyder married C. Canary and became Birdie Canary. 4.) Perhaps it was best to ignore the orders of Dr. Besick, a doctor in Chicago, Illinois. 5.) The Clipper brothers worked as barbers in Bakersfield, California. 6.) Mr. Thrift of Keepit, Australia, won the $30,000 first prize in a lottery. 7.) D. Sharp was a radio tenor. 8.) Dr. H.A. Toothacre worked as dentist for the Burlington, Iowa, Independent School District. 9.) B.F. Parsons was a parson who lived in the parsonage on Parson Street in Sarna, Michigan. 10.) Greg Lawless was a police officer. And Finally... 11.) A.C. Current was an electrical contractor in Tontogany, Ohio. His son''s name? D.C. Current.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Mexican and a Bench? A bench can support a whole family.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Banta Singh got tired of being the butt of jokes, and decided to do his PhD. Banta was looking out for a unique subject to write his thesis when he saw a cockroach. Banta placed the cockroach on the table and cuts one of its leg. Then he said "Walk". The cockroach moves forward. Then Banta cut its second leg and commanded "Walk". The cockroach manages to moves forward. Then Banta cut its third leg and commanded "Walk". The cockroach manages to wriggle forward on one leg. Finally Banta cut its fourth leg and said "Walk". The poor cockroach could not move and lay helplessly on the table. He repeats the same with over 1000 cockroaches. He finds that the results in all his experiments match. Banta is jubilant. "Now," says Banta "My thesis is ready!" and proceeds to write it: "When you cut four legs of a cockroach, it becomes deaf."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of drug dealers from Mexico tried transporting 6,240 pounds of marijuana to America, by hiding it in a tanker truck disguised as a gasoline truck. They were clever, but not bright. They misspelled the name of the gas station on the side of the truck. A woman was arrested in Lake City, Florida for robbery of a motel. She was armed with only an electric chainsaw that was not plugged in. Police in Idaho were amused when they arrived to write up a burglary, and the homeowner told them that the thief had taken his VCR, his bong, and his stash of marijuana. The police ticketed the guy for possession of drug paraphernalia. A girl went to a Taco Bell and asked for a taco with minimal lettuce. The guy behind the cash register said, "Sorry, we only have iceberg lettuce." A student in Belle, West Virginia was suspended for 3 days for giving a friend a cough drop. The principal reiterated the school''s ''Zero tolerance policy.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many authors are disputing who wrote the Shakespeare plays. They each say they did. In their arguing, they decide to try and prove who wrote it by first showing Shakespeare''s work, then theirs. Shakespeare version: TITANIA to BOTTOM Thou art as wise as thou art beautiful. Jack London''s version: TITANIA to BOTTOM You''re as wise as the snowy owl and as beautiful as the clear night sky with fresh white snow under the Northern lights. Dr. Seuss'' version: TITANIA to BOTTOM You''re as attractive as green eggs on a plate and the way you sing is fantastically great! Homer''s version: TITANIA to BOTTOM Be you as wise as Odysseus and as beautiful as fair Helen. Guess who won.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good Ev''nin America! I, George Dubya Bush, confess that I wrote the Shakespeare plays. First of all, I''m very intellentifull. I didn''t mean to confusinate you, but I''m just that smart. Do not misunderestimate me because I can''t prononunce n-n-n-uclar -you know what I mean. Shakespeare was in my axis of evil, so I wrote the plays. I mean, who would write plays like "A Homedy of Terrors, Nothing to Say about Something, The Naming of my Poo, Porklet, and A Late Winter''s Ice Cream?" I must also give credit to my Secretary of State, Donald Rumpelstiltskin for playing an interceptun on my fumble.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl, "Oh, Superman I love you so much!" Superman,"I don''t blame you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CAT 1- So how''d that milk drinking contest go? CAT 2- Oh, I won by six laps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny: Hey dad, are bugs good to eat? Dad: Son, let''s not talk about that at the dinner table, okay? Little Johnny and his dad were talking after dinner... Dad: So what did you want to say about bugs? Little Johnny: Oh, nothing. There was one in your soup, but it''s gone now!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BOB: Hey, I ran into George the other day. JOE: Oh, really? Was he happy to see you? BOB: Well, we were in our cars at the time...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a priest who had to spend the night in a hotel and offered the hat check girl to come up to his room for dinner. After a while he started advancing on her when she stopped him and reminded him he was a holy man. "It''s o.k.," he replied, "it''s written in the Bible." So after a wild night of sex the hat check girl asked to see where in the Bible it says it''s okay. The priest picks up the Bible off the dresser opens to the first page where someone wrote in pencil - "The hat check girl puts out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat that when she put on a yellow jacket kids tried to get on it to go to school because they thought it was a bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rancher walked up to the window at the post office, where a new clerk was sorting mail. "Any mail for Mike Howe?" the rancher asked. The clerk ignored him and the rancher repeated his question in a louder voice. Without looking up, the clerk said, "No, none for your cow and none for your horse, either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Now doctor, isn''t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn''t know about it until the next morning? Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he? Q: Were you present when your picture was taken? Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war? Q: Did he kill you? Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision? Q: You were there until the time you left, is that true? Q: How many times have you committed suicide?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry La Prise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey", died peacefully at age 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in - then the trouble started.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 14-year old boy was helping his mom wash the dishes after dinner on a beautiful day. He says, "Mom, can I go outside? I want to play football." His mom says, "OK, but on one condition: you let your little brother play with you and your friends." The teenager replied with, "But mom, we already tried that. This time I want to play with a real football!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a list of what I have learned so far in my life: 1.) Always smile. It makes adults wonder what you''re up to. 2.) Golf is no longer a rich man''s sport. There are millions of poor players. 3.) If at first you DO succeed, try to hide your astonishment. 4.) It takes a thousand nuts and bolts to put a car together, yet just one nut to scatter it all over the road. 5.) NEVER play leapfrog with a unicorn. 6.) NEVER ask your dad to help you with your math homework, unless you want a 4-hour lecture. 7.) When things look black, send them to the laundry. 8.) Be tolerant of those who disagree with you. After all, they''re entitled to their stupid opinions!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was Superbowl Sunday for the animals, and the Elephants were playing the Cows. The whole first half of the game, the Elephants got their butts whipped. The cows were winning by a mile. By halftime, the Elephants were about ready to give up. But at the start of the second half, a new player ran on to the field. It was a Centipede! He was so fast the cows couldn''t even get within five feet of him. In no time, the Elephants had twice as many points as the cows. At the end of the game, the coach of the Elephants thanked the centipede for helping them win the Super Bowl. "But I just want to know, why didn''t you come out until halftime?" The centipede answered, "It took me that long to put my shoes on!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were arguing when the man commented smugly, "You know, women talk so much! They talk twice as much as man do!" The wife thought for a while and said, "The reason women talk so much is because they have to repeat everything they say." The man frowned. Then he said, "What?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The top 10 signs your best mate is actually a secret agent.... 1. His shoe keeps ringing. 2. When you borrow something from him, it explodes after a week. 3. When you drive his car, you accidentally shoot down the AA Roadwatch helicopter. 4. Various other items he owns self-destruct within five seconds of being handled. 5. He introduces himself with his surname then his first name then his surname again. 6. The dashboard of his new sports car resembles an airplane cockpit. 7. Commutes to the office using a jet pack. 8. "Where do I work? Uh... in the Financial Services Centre! Heheh..." 9. Asks to borrow your exploding pens. 10. Favourite phrase is "Yeah, baby... yeah!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a man speaks in the middle of the forest and no women are around to hear him, is he still wrong?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some common phrases that bees should know: Are you are hipbee? How comb? Hive already finished.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Is A True Senior''s Moment: An elderly couple had dinner at another couple''s house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two elderly gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant, and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly." The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?" The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... the one that is red and has thorns." "Do you mean a rose?" "Oh, yes," the man said, and then he turned toward the kitchen and yelled, "Rose, what''s the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new jewelry store was opening for the first time. On the front of the store, there was a sign that said "Popular Prices". A man looked at the sign and walked right in. He asked the employee at the desk, "How much for that pearl necklace?" "14,000 dollars." "What? How are those popular prices?" The employee replied meekly, "We like ''em."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you list your dog or cat as a dependent on your taxes. You might be a redneck if you have never been on a main road. You might be a redneck if you drive a minivan to the prom. You might be a redneck if the most expensive jewelery you have came from Dollar General.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have more than three first names. You drove a monster truck to the prom. You are marrying your brother-in-law. You go out, get drunk, and come home with a tatoo of your momma''s name. Your last name is your first name spelled backwards You are readiing these jokes!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stupidity is not a crime... So you''re free to go!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so old your social security number is 1!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Going to bed the other night, I noticed people in my shed, stealing things. I phoned the police but was told nobody was in the area to help. They said they would send someone over as soon as possible. I hung up. A minute later, I phoned again. "Hello" I said, "I called you a minute ago because there were people in my shed. You don''t have to worry now because I shot them." Within minutes, there were half a dozen police cars in the area, plus helicopters and an armed response unit. They caught the burglars red-handed. One of the officers said, "I thought you said you shot them." To which I replied, "I thought you said there was no one available."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother found her son scooping ice cream in the kitchen and she was mad. Mom : "Dinner is going to be ready in an hour, put that ice cream away and go play." Son : "But mom, there''s no one to play with." Mom : "I''ll play with you, what do you wanna play?" Son : "Lets play mommy and daddy, you go upstairs and lay down on the bed." The mom said "ok", and went upstairs. The son put on his dad''s fishing hat and lit up one of his dad''s cigarettes. He went upstairs and opened the door. Mom : "Now what do I do?" Son : "Get your ass out of bed, you whore, and fix that kid some friggin ice cream."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You were so ugly as a baby, your incubator was tinted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doctors were talking about their work. "I had great success with one of my patients," said the first doctor. "When he came to me, he thought he was as small as a mouse." "And you cured him?" the second docter asked. "I convinced him that many of the world''s greatest men were small," the first docter said, "He was doing quite well. Then - I lost him." "What happened?" "It was an accident," the doctor sighed sadly, "A pussy cat ate him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oscar got to the broken down inn and asked for a room. "I have only one room left," said the innkeeper, "But before I give it to you, I must tell you that room is where the white-eyed ghost lives." Oscar wasn''t worried. "I''ll take the room," he said, "I''m not afraid of ghosts." That night, when Oscar went to bed, a scary voice said, "Boooo! I am the white-eyed ghost...." "Shut up!" Oscar said, "i''m tired!" "Boooooo" the ghost said again, "I am the white-eyed ghost!" Oscar sat up, reached over, picked up a chair and threw it at the ghost, who disappeared. Oscar lay down again and shut his eyes. "Boooooo!" moaned the voice from the darkness, "I am the black-eyed ghost...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once the head teacher of a primary school walked into a classroom and started firing questions at the students. Head Teacher: "Who made the world?" The students shivered with fright but no one answered. Head Teacher: "Children,I asked, WHO MADE THE WORLD?" The teacher''s voice was getting louder and the kids were freaking out. The head teacher banged his fist on the front desk and yelled: "I SAID, WHO MADE THE WORLD?" One of the students on the front seat yelled out in fright, "OH PLEASE SIR, IT WASN''T ME!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mom was wanting to get her boobs enlarged. Unfortunately for her, she didn''t have enough money to get it done. In fact, she had exactly half the money needed. She was telling her son, Little Benny, "Honey, Mommy really wants to get a boob job. But Mommy has only half the money." She hung her head, and her son said puzzled, "Well why can''t mommy just pick one?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My family has no traditions. We just do the same thing, over and over again, each year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock? Who''s there? Estelle. Estelle Who? Estelle am waiting for you to open this door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LADY TO BEGGAR- Why don''t you get a job? BEGGAR- Actually, I''m an author. I once wrote a book entitled "One Hundred Ways to Make Money." LADY- Well then why are you begging? BEGGAR- It''s one of my ways...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what''s your dog''s name? "I don''t know. He won''t tell me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One fine day in the middle of the night, Two dead men got up to fight, Back to back they faced each other, Drew their swords and shot each other, A paralyzed donkey passing by, Kicked a blind man in the eye, Knocked him through a nine-inch wall Into a dry ditch and drowned them all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PATIENT: "Doctor can you help me? It''s my hearing. I can''t even hear myself cough." DOCTOR: "Okay, have this prescription filled." PATIENT: "Oh, will it improve my hearing?" DOCTOR: "No, but it will help you cough better."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FOREST WARDEN: "Which of you saw this rare tree get cut down? CAMPER: "Only the chain saw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are some books that should never be written: Workaholism, by Anita Dayoff Never Say Goodbye, by C.U. Latta Crowd Control, by General Panic Amazing Facts, by G. Willikers The Last Supper, by M.T. Potts Fast Food, by Eaton Run The Bee Hive, by I. Ben Stung Turn Off The Light, by Les Watts Cattle Ranching, by Brandon D. Bull Bullfighting Mistakes, by Gordon Bluddy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CUSTOMER: "Look at that watch you sold me. It broke. You told me it would last a lifetime." CLERK: "Yeah, well you looked pretty sick the day you bought it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JUDGE: "The court can produce a dozen witnesses who saw you rob the bank." ROBBER: "Big deal! I can bring in hundreds of people who didn''t see it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DOCTOR: "Do you smoke or drink?" PATIENT: "I didn''t know I had a choice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pious man, who had reached the age of 105, suddenly stopped going to synagogue. Alarmed by the old fellow''s absence after so many years of faithful attendance, the Rabbi went to see him. He found him in excellent health, so the Rabbi asked, "How come after all these years we don''t see you at services anymore?"The old man lowered his voice. "I''ll tell you, Rabbi," he whispered. "When I got to be 90, I expected God to take me any day. But then I got to be 95, then 100, then 105. So, I figured that God is very busy and must''ve forgotten about me, and I don''t want to remind Him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PIANO PLAYER: "Do you think I have a gift for playing?" LISTENER: "No, but I''ll give you one for stopping!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so short that when she sat on the curb her legs swing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tyler and Katz, two judges, were each arrested on speeding charges. When they arrived in court on the appointed day, no one was there, so instead of wasting time waiting around they decided to try each other. Motioning Tyler to the stand, Katz said, "How do you plead?" "Guilty." "That''ll be fifty dollars and a warning from the court." Katz stepped down and the two judges shook hands and changed places. "How do you plead?" asked Tyler. "Guilty." Tyler reflected for a moment. "These reckless driving cases are becoming all too common of late," he pointed out. "In fact, this is the second such incident in the last quarter hour. That''ll be two hundred dollars and ten days in jail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rising gas prices have caused the following event: The wife comes home and says, "It''s been a tough week. I want you to take me someplace expensive tonight." The husband promptly takes her to the nearest Gas Station.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom (Reprimandingly): Julia! How many times must I tell you not to pull the cat''s tail? Julia (Innocently): But Mom, I''m only holding the tail. It''s the cat that''s doing the pulling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found this joke someplace: In middle school, I was always self-conscious about my height. Once I was asked out by a life-guard. I had never really stood next to him and didn''t know how tall he was, so the night of the date I took out two pairs of shoes-one with heels, one flat. I arranged with my brother to answer the door, compare his height with my date''s and run upstairs to let me know which shoes to wear. When doorbell rang I waited. Then my brother showed up and told me what I didn''t want to hear: "Go barefoot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Mikey''s parents were going out, and Mikey said, "For 20 bucks, Dad, I''ll be good." "Oh please," said his father. "When I was your age, I was good for nothing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between ignorance and apathy? "I don''t know; and I couldn''t care less."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with two left feet walked into a shoe store and asked, " Do you have any flip-flips?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ther was a blind man walking along with his guide dog when he came to a road. The dog stopped for a second and then carried on into the thick of the traffic. The man was almost hit several times but he managed to get to the other side unharmed. When he got to the other side he took a treat for his dog out of his bag as a reward. A man driving by saw this and stopped and asked the man, "Why the hell are you rewarding your dog if he almost got you killed?" The blind man replied, "Because I''m trying to find his head so I can kick his ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student was in the percussion section of the band, and was not doing well. The band had a performance that night, and the conductor had an annoucement to make. The conductor said, "When a student is having trouble playing an instrument, we can give him two sticks and make him a percussionist, and let him play the drums, which---" The conductor was interrupted by a student in the back of the room who said, "And when that''s too hard for him, we can take one of his sticks away, and make him a conductor!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dumb blonde, smart blonde, santa clause, and the tooth fairy are walking on the sidewalk together. One of them steps on a five dollar bill. Who picks it up? Answer no one!! three of them don''t exist and the dumb blonde thought it was a gum wrapper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus, Moses and an Old Man with a long gray beard, in overalls were playing golf. Moses tees off and his ball lands 5 inches from the hole. "Nice shot, Moses," says Jesus. Next, Jesus tees off. His ball lands 2 inches from the hole. "Well, you were closer that I was," said Moses. Next the old man tees off. As he is chewing on a piece of straw, he watches his ball head straight for the water hazard, where it is immediately swallowed by a fish. Just as the fish jumps up to swallow the ball, an eagle swoops down and grabs the fish. As the eagle is flying away, a lightning bolt strikes him and he drops the fish. The fish lands about 10 inches from the hole and the ball pops out and rolls right into the hole. Jesus looks back and says, "Nice shot, Dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?" A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said, "All I want out of life is four little animals." The teacher asked, "Really and what four little animals would that be sugar?" The little girl said, "A mink on my back, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bed, and a jackass to pay for all of it." The teacher fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Barbara Walters of 20/20 did a story on gender roles in Kabul several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked about 5 paces behind their husbands. She returned to Kabul recently and observed that women still walk behind their husbands, but now seem to walk even further back and are happy with the old custom. Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, "Why do you now seem happy with the old custom that you used to try and change?" "Land mines," said the woman. MORAL: BEHIND EVERY MAN IS A SMART WOMAN', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time there was a mother duck and a father duck who had seven baby ducklings. Six of them were regular-looking ducklings. The seventh was a REALLY ugly duckling. Everyone used to say, "What a nice-looking bunch of ducklings--- all except that one. Boy, he''s really ugly." The really ugly duckling heard these people, but he didn''t care. He knew that ONE day, he would probably grow up to be a swan, and be bigger and look better than anything in the pond. * * * * * * * * WELL, AS IT TURNED OUT, HE WAS JUST A REALLY UGLY DUCKLING. AND HE GREW UP TO BE JUST A REALLY UGLY DUCK. THE END.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was at a strip club, and he had glitter all over him, but he didn''t know it. He got in his car, and drove home, and it was about 11:30 when he got home. His wife was standing at the door when he got home. He kissed her, then told her that he was tired and wanted to go to sleep. His wife stopped him before he went upstairs to their room. She asked, "So why do you have glitter all over you?" Her husband thought quick and replied meekly, "Makin'' you a card..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was Father''s Day, and Little Billy''s mom told him to tell his dad to just lay around, watch TV, and do nothing productive. So Little Billy went into the family room where he found his dad watching TV. Little Billy said, "Dad, it''s Father''s Day, so mom and me think that you should just lay around, watch TV, and do nothing productive." His dad looked up from the TV and smiled, then went back to watching his show. Little Billy paused a moment and said, "You know, just like you usually do..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A stingy old lawyer who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness was determined to prove wrong the saying, "You can''t take it with you." After much thought and consideration, the old ambulance-chaser finally figured out how to take at least some of his money with him when he died. He instructed his wife to go to the bank and withdraw enough money to fill two pillow cases. He then directed her to take the bags of money to the attic and leave them directly above his bed. His plan: When he passed away, he would reach out and grab the bags on his way to heaven. Several weeks after the funeral, the deceased lawyer''s wife, up in the attic cleaning, came upon the two forgotten pillow cases stuffed with cash. "Oh, that darned old fool," she exclaimed. "I knew he should have had me put the money in the basement."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An attorney telephoned the governor just after midnight, insisting that he talk to him regarding a matter of utmost urgency. An aide eventually agreed to wake up the governor. "So, what is it?" grumbled the governor. "Judge Garber has just died," said the attorney, "and I want to take his place." The governor replied: "Well, it''s OK with me if it''s OK with the undertaker."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was driving her brand new, VERY expensive, Mustang convertible, when she saw her brunette friend. She thought that this was her chance to brag about it, so she drove over to her. The brunette recognized her, and said, "Hey!" The blonde smiled; this was her chance. She said, "Hey, look what I got that you don''t have!" patting her convertible. The brunette smiled sweetly back and said, "Well, look what I got that YOU don''t have," patting her brain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? I''m a pile up. I''m a pile up who? Yes, you are a pile of poo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BOB- It''s Friday the 13th. Do you have any superstitions? GEORGE- I think it''s unlucky to have superstitions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do black people have white hands? A: Everyone has a little good in them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story: A rather well-proportioned secretary, Joan, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel. She wore a bathing suit the first day but, on the second, she decided that no one could see her wayyy up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan. She''d hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs; she was lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear. "Excuse me, miss," said the flustered little assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs. "The Hilton doesn''t mind you sunbathing on the roof but we would very much appreciate you wearing a bathing suit as you did yesterday." "What difference does it make?" Joan asked rather calmly. "No one can see me up here, and besides, I''m covered with a towel." "Not exactly," said the embarrassed little man. "You''re lying on the dining room skylight."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call it, when a bison gets a loan? A: A Buffa-loan!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Daddy: Get the Nuts son Bobby: Yes Dad Daddy: Ouch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a guy were out on a date and they ended up at "Lovers Cove" where they were making out. The guy thought that things were going pretty good and maybe he would get lucky tonight, so he thought that he would ask her if she wanted to go in the back seat. "NO!" yelled the blonde. The guy just figured that she wasn''t ready yet. Things got pretty hot and the guy thought he would try again. "NO!" the blonde yelled again. Things got even hotter and the blond was down to her bra and the guy even had her pants unzipped. "Do you wanna go in the back seat yet?" asked the guy. "For the last time, NO!" said the blonde. Frustrated, the guy asked, "Well, why the hell not?" The blonde looked at him and said, "Because I wanna stay up here with you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Diner: I can''t eat such a rotten chicken.Call the manager! Waiter: It''s no use. He won''t eat it either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was searching the dictionary for the word ''Dictionary''. He found this meaning: Dictionary is the thing you are holding, Stupid. Wondering what the definition of stupid was, he searched for the word stupid, he found: Is that you again?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. "Hurry!" she said, "stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. "Don''t move until I tell you to," she whispered. "Just pretend you''re a statue." "What''s this, honey?" the husband inquired as he entered the room. "Oh, it''s just a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too." No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep. Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk. "Here," he said to the ''statue'', "eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths for three days and nobody offered me as much as a glass of water."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('--That comment about Elton being "twice the woman" she ever was. --Caught Eminem fantasizing about killing other women. --Sick of hiding her love for the Insane Clown Posse. --Sure, he talks and raps like a black man, but when he takes down his pants... -', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was playing with his father''s wallet when he accidently swallowed a quarter. He went crying to his mom, choking on the quarter. They took him to a doctor, who said that the quarter was impossible to remove without surgery, they consulted a specialist who was of the same opinion. Then came a man who said he could get the money out in a jiffy. He turned little Johnny upside down and patted him with great precision on the back of neck and, sure enough, the quarter rolled out. Everyone was amazed, the father said "You must be an expert!" The man replied, "No sir I''m just a tax collector."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During class, a teacher trying to teach good manners asks the students, one by one - "John, if you were on a date, having supper with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?" "Just a minute, I have to go piss." The teacher replied "That would be rude and impolite!" "What about you, Michael, how would you say it?" "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I''ll be right back." The teacher responded, "That''s better, but it''s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the table." "And you, Billy, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners?" "I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment, I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you''ll get to meet after supper." The teacher fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was doing his homework, and it was some sort of code where you had to fill in which letter is which, i.e. the letter a = 1, b = 2, d = 4, etc. He got to one that he didn''t know which number it was, and he decided to ask his father, who was sitting on the couch next to him. Little Johnny said, "Hey dad, can you tell me what the 25th letter of the alphabet is?" The dad answered, "Y." Little Johnny said, "Because I wanna know. Gosh, do you know it or not?" The dad said, "Y, son!" Little Johnny said, "Because I wanna know, and if you want to deny it again, then you are more of a *&^%ing *&^%$ than a ^&*# on a %$#@! The dad took this hard, and said meekly, "It''s the letter ''y'', son." Little Johnny said, "Oh, thank you, dad. So I guess this would be a bad time to ask for a raise for my allowance, eh?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. They merely change the standard to darkness and upgrade the customers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was singing. One of the guests turned to a man by his side and criticized the singer. "What a terrible voice!" he said. "Do you know who she is?" "Yes," was the answer. "She is my wife." "Oh, I beg your pardon." The man said, "Of course her voice is not bad, but the song is very bad. I wonder who wrote that awful song." "I did." was the answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I studied and studied and came up with a conclusion 1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL. 2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING. 3. The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL. 4. The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL. 5. The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS. 6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is GOLF. AMAZING CONCLUSION: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the book have to go to the hospital? Because it injured its spine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eminem/ M & M: I don''t like the rapper, but I like the candy inside the wrapper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You know you''re a redneck when you go out with your girlfriend and you don''t realize she has her other boyfriend with her. 2. You know you''re a redneck when you use a barstool as a walker. 3. You know you''re a redneck when your mowing your lawn and you find a car. 4. You know you''re a redneck when you fall asleep with one hand down your pants and a beer in the other hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This little boy asked his mother one day why his father had no hair. His mother replied, "Well dear, that''s because he thinks alot." Having prided herself with coming up with such a wonderful answer she heard her son say, "Gee mommy I''m sure glad you don''t think ''cause you''d look funny with no hair!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck when your brand new tv is sitting on your old ones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s only funny until someone gets hurt... Then it''s hilarious!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A baby turtle was standing at the bottom of a large tree and with a deep sigh, started to climb. About an hour later, he reached a very high branch and walked along to the end. He turned and spread all four flippers and launched himself off the branch. When he landed at the bottom in a pile of soft, dead leaves, he shook himself off, walked back to the bottom of the tree, and with a sigh started to climb. About an hour later, he again reached the very high branch, walked along, turned, spread his flippers and flung himself off the branch. Again, he landed on the bottom, shook himself off, went to the bottom of the tree, sighed and started climbing. Watching these proceedings from the end of the branch were two little birds. Mommy bird turned to Daddy bird and said, "Don''t you think it''s time we told him he was adopted?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest and a minister were going on vacation (seperately) when their flight got postponed. They meet each other and deside to go across the street to a bar until their flight. Little did they know, it was a gay bar. When a man started hitting on the priest he grew fruious and the gay man stalked off. A little while later a big, buff man walks over to the priest and says "Why the Hell did you start screaming at my boyfriend for no reason?" The minister, seeing that the priest was at a loss of words, takes the big man out of earshot of the priest and talks to him. After he comes back without the big man, the priest asks him, "What did you say to him?" The minister calmly repies "I told him that we were on our way to our honeymoon and our flight got posponed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, "Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large." Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, "We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows." The conversation has, meanwhile, almost died when the Texan sees a mob of kangaroos hopping through the field. He asks, "And what are those?" The Aussie, fed up with the Texan''s bragging replies with an incredulous look, "What, don''t you have any grasshoppers in Texas?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist. "I''m on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me." Psychiatrist: "Don''t you have a phone in your car?" Blonde: "That was a little too expensive, so I did the next best thing. I put a mailbox in my car." Psychiatrist: "Uh ... How''s that working?" Blonde: "Actually, I haven''t gotten any letters yet." Psychiatrist: "And why do you think that is?" Blonde: "I figure it''s because when I''m driving around, my zip code keeps changing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mammas breath so nasty that when she burps her teeth have to duck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The master, to impress on his pupils the need of thinking before speaking, told them to count to fifty before saying anything important, and to one hundred if it was very important. The next day he was speaking, standing with his back to the fire, when he noticed several lips moving rapidly. Suddenly the whole class shouted: "Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, a hundred. Your coat is on fire, sir!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went into your house, took a booger off the wall and yo mamma told me not to touch the family portrait.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom is so stupid she tried to wake up a sleeping bag.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly, when she walks down the street in September, people say, "Damn! Is it Halloween already?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This man goes along to the Patent Office with some of his new designs. He says to the clerk, "I''d like to register my new invention. It''s a folding bottle." "OK," says the clerk. "What do you call it?" "A fottle," replies the inventor. "A fottle? That''s stupid! Can''t you think of something else?" "I can think about it. I''ve got something else though. It''s a folding carton." "And what do you call that?" asks the clerk. "A farton", replies the inventor. "That''s rude. You can''t possibly call it that!" "In that case," says the inventor... "You''re really going to hate the name of my folding bucket."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a non-conforming sparrow who decided not to fly south for the winter. However, soon the weather turned so cold that he reluctantly started to fly south. In a short time, ice began to form on his wings and he fell to earth in a barnyard, almost frozen. A cow passed by and crapped on the little sparrow. The sparrow thought it was the end. But, the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings. Warm and happy, able to breathe, he started to sing. Just then a large cat came by and, hearing the chirping, investigated the sounds. The cat cleared away the manure, found the chirping bird and promptly ate him. The moral of the story: 1.) Everyone who craps on you is not necessarily your enemy. 2.) Everyone who gets you out of the crap is not necessarily your friend. 3.) And, if you''re warm and happy in a pile of crap, keep your mouth shut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the clock say to the wristwatch? "I enjoyed tocking with you, but now you''re starting to tick me off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vegetable: "Hey, lets get married." Fruit: "I''m sorry." Vegetable: "We could secretly get married." Fruit: "No, we couldn''t." Vegetable: "Why?" Fruit: "Because we can''t elope." Can''t elope = cantelope', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what style of shoes a frog loves most? Open toad!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Jimmy, Little Billy, and Jimmy''s father were at an Art Museum. Little Jimmy was looking at a picture of someone in a carriage being pulled by a horse. Little Jimmy brought his father over to look at the picture, and he asked his father, "Daddy, what is this?" His dad replied, "Why, that is a horse-drawn carriage!" Little Jimmy excitedly ran over to Little Billy, brought him back to the picture, and said, "Billy, a horse drew this picture!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde''s son was playing catch with his friend. The blonde was working in the yard, planting flowers and such. Her son was throwing the baseball back and forth with his friend when he suddenly smiled. He threw the baseball straight at his blonde mom, and yelled, "Think Fast!!!" so the blonde said silently to herself, "Fast, fast, fast, fast..." The blonde got herself hit right plop in the head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Momma''s teeth are so yellow that when she smiles people SLOW DOWN!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t drink and drive, you''ll spill your beer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like beer. They look good, smell good, taste good, and feel good. But after a while you gotta have another beer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so stupid, she got stabbed in a shoot-out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so poor, she wore her McDonalds uniform to church.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of monkey eats chips? A chipmunk!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a list of the worst names to have Dick Hurtz Hary Paratesticles Mike Hunt Mike Rotch Anitta Manwhore Anitta Johnson Fuk Yao Ike Anblow Peter Pecker I.C. Weiner I.P. Freely Seimore Butts Bo Oobless Dick Less Issac Less Tits McGee (ok, that was off Anchorman) Ima Hornibusterd Ima Uglibech Ima Dick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks up to a doctor and asks: "What type of questions do you ask people to decide if they are retarded or not?" "I ask questions like; If you had to empty a bathtub that was full of water, and I gave you a teaspoon, a bucket, and a cup, how would you get the water out?" "Oh I see," the man said, "a sensible man would use the bucket because it is bigger." "No, a sensible person would pull the plug."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, Doctor! My friend has only 59 seconds to live. "Don''t worry, I''ll be there in a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I work at Bed, Bath and Beyond in the ''Beyond'' dept.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If to give a man a fish, he eats for a day, but if you teach a man to fish... He has to buy a license, poles, bait, and sit on his behind for four hours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb? A. Hey, let''s go ride bikes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Artery: Study of paintings Bacteria: Backdoor to cafeteria Barium: What to do when treatment fails Bowel: Letter like A E I O or U Ceasarean Section: District in Rome Cat Scan: Searching for Kitty Cauterize: Made eye contact with her Coma: Punctuation Mark Congenital: Friendly D & C: Where Washington is Dilate: To live long Enema: Not a friend Fester: Quicker Genital: Non-Jewish Hang Nail: Coat Hook Impotent: Distinguished, well known Labor pain: Hurt at work Morbid: Higher offer Nitrate: Cheeper than day Node: Was aware of Outpatient: Person fainted Post op: Letter Carrier Recovery Room: Place to apholster Rectum: Dang near Killed Him Rheumatic: Amorous Secretion: Hiding something Tablet: Small table Terminal Illness: Sick at Airport Tibia: Country in North Africa Tumor: More than One Urine: Opposite of ''you''re out'' Varicose: Nearby Vein: Conceited', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who can do binary and those who can''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ears pierced? A buck an ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. He says, "What are you doing?" She answers, "I''m moving to Las Vegas. I heard prostitutes there get paid $400 for doing what I do for you for free!" Later that night on her way out the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase. When she asks him where he''s going, he replies, "I''m going to Vegas too. I want to see you live on $800 a year!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man left his cat with his brother while he went on vacation for a week. When he came back, he called his brother to see when he could pick the cat up. The brother hesitated, then said, "I''m so sorry, but while you were away, the cat died." The man was very upset and yelled, "You know, you could have broken the news to me better than that. When I called today, you could have said he was on the roof and wouldn''t come down. Then when I called the next day, you could have said that he had fallen off and the vet was working on patching him up. Then when I called the third day, you could have said he had passed away." The brother thought about it and apologized. "So how''s Mom?" asked the man. "She''s on the roof and won''t come down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('OK, let''s consider the physical evidence. The moon is moving away at a tiny, although measurable distance from the Earth every year. Do the math and you will clearly see that 85 million years ago it was orbiting the earth at a distance of about 35 feet from the earth''s surface. This would explain the death of the dinosaurs; the tallest ones, anyway', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There where two snakes talking. The 1st one said, "Sidney, are we the type of snake who wrap ourselves around our prey and squeeze and crush until they''re dead? Or are we the type of snake who ambush our prey and bite them and they are poisioned?" The second snake says, "Why do you ask?" The 1st one replies: "I just bit my lip!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so small, she held up a sign that said "Don''t spit, I can''t swim."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your dog farts and YOU claim it... you might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had parked his car in the supermarket parking lot and was walking past an empty cart, when he heard a female voice say, "Mister, are you using that cart?" "No," he answered..."I''m only after one thing." As he walked away he heard her murmur, "Typical male."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Emerging from the chiropractor''s treatment room, a young man said aloud, "I feel like a new man!" "I do, too," a middle-aged woman responded, "but I''ll probably go home with the same old one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she doesnt have dreams... she has MOTION PICTURES!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys were at the gym. Bob asked Ben, "How did the date go with my sister?" Bob replied, "I didn''t know your sister was famous. When I took her to the opera, and when it was over no one would leave until she stood up and sang."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lion woke up one morning feeling really rowdy and mean. He went out and cornered a small monkey and roared, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?" The trembling monkey says, "You are, mighty lion!" Later, the lion confronts a ox and fiercely bellows, "Who is the mightiest of all jungle animals?" The terrified ox stammers, "Oh great lion, you are the mightiest animal in the jungle!" On a roll now, the lion swaggers up to an elephant and roars, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?" Fast as lightning, the elephant snatches up the lion with his trunk, slams him against a tree half a dozen times leaving the lion feeling like he''d been run over by a safari wagon. The elephant then stomps on the lion till he looks like a corn tortilla and ambles away. The lion lets out a moan of pain, lifts his head weakly and hollers after the elephant - "Just because you don''t know the answer, you don''t have to get so upset about it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How did the blonde die drinking milk? A: The cow fell on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do peroxide blondes and black men have in common? A: They both have black roots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call it when a blonde dyes their hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy Bob and Lester were talking one afternoon when Billy Bob told Lester, "Ya know, I reckon I''m about ready for a vacation. Only this year I''m gonna do it a little different. The last few years, I took your suggestions as to where to go. Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii. I went to Hawaii and Marie got pregnant. Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Marie got pregnant again. Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Marie didn''t get pregnant again!" Lester asks Billy Bob, "So, what you gonna do this year that''s different?" Billy Bob says, "This year, I''m takin'' Marie with me..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so funky, they closed the beaches for a week after she drained her bath water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so poor she can''t even pay attention.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the most common phrase in your house is "Somebody go jiggle the handle!"... you might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is more peculiar than watching a catfish? Watching a goldfish bowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three prisoners who were about to be executed by the electric chair. The guards strapped down the first one, a Frenchman, onto the chair, and they asked him for his last words. "Vive la France!" he said, meaning ''Long live France''. When they pulled the switch, nothing happened. Everyone was amazed and thought that a miracle had occurred. The Frenchman was saved from death and released. The guards strapped the second one, an Englishman, in the chair. When asked for his last words, he said, "Long live the Queen!" Again, when they pulled the switch, nothing happened. He was saved and released. When they asked the last prisoner who was an Irishman for his last words, he said, "Do you know why the other two prisoners escaped death? It''s because you stupid blokes forget to plug in the cable!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard''s DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn''t solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and yellow. For instance, green is a combination of cyan and yellow, but green printed fine. Every color of the rainbow printed fine except for yellow. I had the customer change ink cartridges. I had the customer delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing worked. I asked my co-workers for help; they offered no new ideas. After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, "Should I try printing on a piece of white paper instead of this "yellow" construction paper?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer''s club by mistake. The old legal lions gave them a fight for their life and their money. The gang was very happy to escape. "It ain''t so bad," one crook noted. "We got $50 between us." The boss screamed: "I warned you to stay clear of lawyers.... we had $100 when we broke in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the banana go to the doctors? Because it wasn''t peeling well', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do elephants always bring on holiday? A trunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a football pitch so cold? Because of all the fans', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are Martians favorite sweets? Mars-mallows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you give a sick pig? Oinkment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which fish is the most valuable in the sea? A goldfish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of saw cuts the sea? A see-saw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the noisiest part of a tree? Its bark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever been to KFC? Ever notice that sometimes their toilets do not provide toilet rolls? Reason being that they uphold their motto: "It''s finger licking good!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four football fans go rock climbing one afternoon: a Patriots fan, a Falcons fan, an Eagles fan, and a Steelers fan. They had been arguing all the way up the mountain about who among them was the most "die-hard" fan. Upon reaching the top of the mountain, the Patriots fan proclaimed to the other three... "This is for the New England Patriots!" and promptly threw himself off the mountain as a form of sacrifice. Not to be outdone by a Patriots fan, the Falcons fan jumped up and said... "This is for the Atlanta Falcons!" and then threw himself off the mountain, again as a form of sacrifice. Refusing to be outdone by the Patriots and Falcons fans, the Steelers fan rose to his feet and yelled at the top of his lungs, "This is for the Pittsburgh Steelers!" and without hesitation, pushed the Philadelphia Eagles fan off the mountain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman and her goose walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why''d you bring the pig in the bar?" The woman answered, "I do believe this is a goose!" The bartender says, "I was talking to the goose!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young cowboy walked into a seedy cafe in a small town in western Oklahoma. He sat at the counter and noticed an older cowboy with his arms folded staring blankly at a bowl of chili. After about 15 minutes of just sitting there staring at it, the young cowboy bravely asked, "If you ain''t gonna eat that, mind if I do?" The older cowboy slowly turns his head toward the young wrangler and in his best cowboy manner states, "Nah, go ahead." Eagerly, the young cowboy reached over and slid the bowl over to his place and started spooning it in with delight. He got nearly down to the bottom of the bowl and noticed a rotten, dead rat in the chili. The sight was shocking and he immediately puked up the chili into the bowl. The old cowboy quietly said, "Yup, that''s as far as i got, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family of moles had been hibernating all winter. One beautiful spring morning, they woke up. The father mole stuck his head out of the hole and looked around. "Mother Mole!" He called back down the hole. "Come up here! I smell honey, fresh made honey!" The mother mole ran up and squeezed in next to him. "That''s not honey, that''s maple syrup! I smell maple syrup!" The baby mole, still down in the hole, was sulking. "I can''t smell anything down here but molasses..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A journalist assigned to the Jerusalem bureau takes an apartment overlooking the Wailing Wall. Every day when she looks out, she sees an old Jewish man praying vigorously. So, the journalist goes down and introduces herself to the old man. She asks, "You come every day to the wall. How long have you done that, and what are you praying for?"The old man replies, "I have come here to pray every day for 25 years. In the morning I pray for world peace and then for the brotherhood of man. I go home, have a cup of tea, and I come back and pray for the eradication of illness and disease from the earth." The journalist is amazed. "How does it make you feel to come here every day for 25 years and pray for these things?" she asks. The old man looks at her sadly. "Like I''m talking to a wall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a fatal bus accident and the only survivor was a monkey. In order to fill in the blanks of the event, the police had hired a monkey trainer that could speak sign language with the monkey. The trainer first asked the monkey if he had actually been on the bus. The monkey nodded yes. The trainer then asked the monkey what was going on in the bus just before the accident. The monkey made hand motions to signal that there had been some heavy drinking of alcohol going on. The trainer motioned, "I see, what else was going on?" To this, the monkey made gestures to show people smoking marijuana. The trainer motioned, "Isee, what else was going on?" To this, the monkey depicted with his hands that everyone was having sex. The trainer, conviced of what actually happened, then asked the monkey, "What were you doing while all this was going on?" The monkey replied, "looking over my shoulder while I was driving the bus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a chicken with a monkey? George W. Bush', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s grosser than gross? When you find a used tampon in your ketchup bottle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s grosser than gross? When you''re eating a bowl of rice crispies and one gets up and slithers away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mouth has turned into a flower bed. It has tulips.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the police station, Bubba explained to the police officer why his cousins shot him. "Well," Bubba began, "We wuz havin'' a good time drinking, when my cousin Ray picked up his shotgun and said, ''Hey, der ya fellows wanna go huntin''?''" "And then what happened?" the officer interrupted. "From what I remember," Bubba said, "I stood up and said, ''Sure, I''m game.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a doctor''s office. He says, "Doctor, doctor, you''ve got to help me! My elbow keeps coming untied. . . my belly button is out of order. . . I can''t open my chest. . . I''m losing the leaves in my palm. . . somebody threw my waist in the trash. . . and my foot is only eleven inches!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks in to the hospital to visit her husband. She talks to the doctor, and the doctor says,"I have bad news, and worse news." The woman starts to cry, asking for the bad news first. The doctor replies,"The bad news is that your husband only has 24 hours to live." The woman starts to cry even more, and now asks for the worse news. The Doctor now replies,"The worse news is that I have been trying to contact you since yesterday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a man and a condom? Condoms have changed. They''re no longer thick and insensitive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a man''s ultimate embarrassment? Having an erection, walking into a wall, and hurting his nose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of sign does a prostitute hang on her door when she goes on vacation? "GO SCREW YOURSELF!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? A. Money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went to an eye doctor to have her eyes checked for glasses. The doctor directed her to read various letters with the left eye while covering the right eye. The blonde was so mixed up on which eye was which that the eye doctor in disgust took a paper sack with a hole to see through, and put it on her head to cover up the appropriate eye and asked her to read the letters. As he did so, he noticed the blonde had tears streaming down her face. "Look," said the doctor, "there''s no need to get upset about getting glasses." "I know," agreed the blonde, "but I kind of had my heart set on wire frames."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look at ME! boasted the fit old man, pounding a very flat and firm stomach, having just finished 100 situps before a group of young people. "Fit as a fiddle! And you want to know why? I don''t smoke, I don''t drink, I don''t stay up late, and I don''t chase after loose women!" He smiled at them, teeth white, eyes aglitter, "And tomorrow -- tomorrow, I''m going to celebrate my *90th* birthday!" "Oh, really?" drawled one of the young onlookers, "How?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man arrives at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells him that he will remain frozen until his whole family is there. That way, it would stop him from doing anything NOT with his family. So, a couple years pass, and his wife appeared in heaven. She had died of age. She was frozen along with her spouse. One more year passes, and one of their two kids arrive. He had died because he was shot. He was frozen along with them. They all watch many more people enter heaven. They suddenly saw the milkman enter heaven. He did NOT have any family; he was adopted. But for some reason, he was frozen along with them. The woman and the milkman''s eyes each grew very big. Finally, the last kid died of age MANY years later, and the woman, the angry husband, the milkman, and the 2 kids all were released from being frozen to go to heaven.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always be smarter than the inanimate object that you''re working with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man said to his golfing friend, "I hit two of my best balls yesterday!" "Oh yeah?" "Yeah, I stepped on a rake in the bunker."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the first 4 words in the Mexican National Anthem? "Attention all K-Mart shoppers"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the turtle cross the road? A:To get to the shell gas station!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Spanish man with a rubber toe? Answer: Roberto.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A biker walks into a yuppie bar and shouts, "All lawyers are assholes!" He looks around, obviously hoping for a challenge. Finally a guy comes up to him, taps him on the shoulder, and says, "Take that back." The biker says, "Why? Are you a lawyer?" "No, I''m an asshole."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a couple of kids named "Poop", "Shut-Up", and "Manners" were on a bus. All of a sudden Poop falls out of the window! Manners jumps out of the bus to save him. So, Shut-Up runs to the bus driver to get some help. The bus driver asks him, "What''s your name?!" "Shut-Up." At this point the bus driver is mad. He asks, "Where are your manners?!" Shut-Up replies, "Outside picking up Poop."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever wonder why bottled water costs so much when there is so much of it? Spell "evian" backwards.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 3 religious truths: Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian Faith Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ok, If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the Jags, and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers known as Bucs, what does that make the Tennessee Titans?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The children begged for a hamster, and after the usual fervent vows that they alone would care for it, they got one. They named it Danny. Two months later, when Mom found herself responsible for cleaning and feeding the creature, she located a prospective new home for it. The children took the news of Danny''s imminent departure quite well, though one of them remarked, "He''s been around here a long time - we''ll miss him." "Yes," Mom replied, "But he''s too much work for one person, and since I''m that one person, I say he goes." Another child offered, "Well, maybe if he wouldn''t eat so much and wouldn''t be so messy, we could keep him." But Mom was firm. "It''s time to take Danny to his new home now," she insisted. "Go and get his cage." With one voice and in tearful outrage the children shouted, "Danny? We thought you said Daddy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends were talking. The first one said to the other, "Hey, have you seen the movie, "Constipated" yet?" The other replied, "Of course not! It hasn''t come out yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Students... Take Note: Knowledge is power ... But power corrupts ... And corruption is a crime ... And crime doesn''t pay ... So if you keep on studying you''ll go broke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Alabama State Trooper Patrol cars were in hot pursuit of a Camaro heading east towards Georgia on I-90. When the suspect crossed the Georgia line, the first trooper pulled over immediately. The rookie Trooper pulled over right behind him and asked, "Sarge, why''d you stop?" "You dumb rookie," replied the Sarge. "He''s in Georgia now. They''re an hour ahead of us, so we''ll never catch him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After every line I type, say out loud to yourself, Hairy Pickle There once was a guy named He lived in a town called Nobody did like So they hung him buy his', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid, she thought that Tiger Woods was a place that was dangerous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What''s with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don''t know, but I''ve never seen such ineptitude!" The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let''s have a word with him." "Hi George. Say, what''s with that group ahead of us? They''re rather slow, aren''t they?" The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that''s a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That''s so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. And I''m going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there''s anything he can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can''t these guys play at night?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fishing season hasn''t opened and a fisherman who doesn''t have a license, is casting for trout as a stranger approaches and asks: "Any luck?" "Any luck? This is a wonderful spot. I took 10 out of this stream yesterday," he boasts. "Is that so? By the way, do you know who I am?" asks the stranger. "Nope." "Well, meet the new game warden." "Oh," gulped the fisherman. "Well, do you know who I am?" "Nope." "Meet the biggest liar in the state!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of young boys were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track. All of a sudden, the Game Warden jumped out of the bushes. Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like a bat out of hell. The Game Warden was hot on his heels. After about a half mile, the young man stopped and stooped over with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath, so the Game Warden finally caught up to him. "Let''s see yer fishin'' license, Boy!" the Warden gasped. With that, the boy pulled out his wallet and gave the Game Warden a valid fishing license. "Well, son," said the Game Warden. "You must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don''t have to run from me if you have a valid license!" "Yes, sir," replied the young guy. "But my friend back there, well, he don''t have one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the best fishermen in the state? Master Baiters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so stupid, she tried to cut through a safe with a Laser Tag gun!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young brunette used to always wonder why her blonde best friend would get A''s on all her tests and the brunette would get A-''s. She thought that was a little weird, so one day she asked her friend why she got better grades, and her friend said that she just copied the answers out of her book, so the brunette said, "But none of them were open book," and the blonde says, "Oh, that might explain why no one was using their books!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The law of drunkenness- You can''t fall off the floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn''t have to do it himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t lose my mind, I just let it wander and it never came back. I miss it so much.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond, brunette, and redhead are talking. The blond asks the brunette, "Where did you get those hair streaks?" She answers, "Its natural." The brunette asks the redhead the same question. "Its natural." she answers. The redhead and brunette ask the blond, "How did you get that green streak in your hair?" She answers, "Phhnnnggg," (As she blows her nose on her hand and puts it through her hair) "Its natural.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat she tried on Orion''s belt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus. So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don''t you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy." The blind man replies, "If you would''ve put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick, we''d be riding the bus, so shut the hell up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was soooo ugly when I was born that my mum got morning sickness after I was born. The doctor came in to the waiting room after I was born and told my dad, "We did everything we could, but he pulled through." I''ve never been able to understand why my bath toys were a radio and a toaster. And when I play in the sandpit, the cat always covers me up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('14 THINGS PMS STANDS FOR Pass My Shotgun Psychotic Mood Shift Perpetual Munching Spree Puffy Mid-Section People Make Me Sick Provide Me with Sweets Pardon My Sobbing Pimples May Surface Pass My Sweatpants Pissy Mood Syndrome Plainly; Men Suck Pack My Stuff Permanent Menstrual Syndrome', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a blond and a toothbrush? A: You don''t lend a toothbrush to your best friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the female math book that lived underwater wearing? An algae-bra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the boy wear a diaper to the party? A: He didn''t want to be a party pooper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you do when your nose goes on strike? A: Pick it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the depths of the countryside there lived a farmer who took care of baby animals. The farm was very peaceful until one day the farmer''s pig was murdered. Now the farmer took this incident very seriously, so he started an investigation. Unfortunately, the only witness the farmer had to this murder was his pet bunny rabbit. Since the rabbit was unable to speak and tell him who murdered the little pig, the farmer lined up his four prime suspects, a cow, a horse, a goat, and a duck, and told the rabbit to pick out who had committed the dirty deed. The rabbit hopped up and down the line, checking each animal, and then finally hopped forward three feet, and stopped in front of the goat. "It wasn''t me! It wasn''t me!" yelled the goat. The farmer shook his head and said, "The hare''s looking at you, kid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FRIEND: You don''t look so good, what''s wrong? HARRY: I got domestic trouble. FRIEND: But Harry you always said your wife was a pearl. HARRY: Yeah its the mother of pearl that''s the problem.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you recognize a blonde in school? A: They are the only ones who erase their notebook when the teacher erases the board.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rules for the dog- _______________________ 1. The dog is not allowed in the house. 2. Ok, the dog is allowed in the house, but only in certain parts. 3. The dog is allowed in all rooms, but has to stay off the furniture. 4. The dog can get on the old furniture only. 5. Fine, the dog allowed on all the furniture, but is not allowed to sleep with the humans on the bed. 6. Ok, the dog is allowed on the bed but by invitation only. 7. The dog can sleep on the bed whenever he wants, but not under the covers. 8. The dog can sleep under the covers by invitation only. 9. The dog can sleep under the covers every night. 10. Humans must ask permission to sleep under the covers with the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does a blonde do when it gets cold? A: Sits around a candle Q: What does she do when it gets really cold? A: Lights it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young lady came home from a date looking rather sad. She told her mother, "Arthur proposed to me an hour ago." "Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked. "Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn''t even believe there''s a hell." Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we''ll show him how wrong he is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The football players were doing very well in their games, but when it came to academics, they were failing. So the administrater of the school, who desired all of his students to graduate, talked to the coach of the football team and said, "Coach, if ONE of your football players can answer a single math problem, I will not get rid of the football team, but if he gets it wrong, I''m afraid I will have to throw out the team. When the team was gathered up and a player was selected to answer the problem, the administrator asked him, "Okay, what is 3 + 4?" The football player thought and thought and thought and thought. After five hours and multiple countings on his fingers, the player said, "Seven!" The coach raised his arms and pleaded, "Give him another chance, please!!!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks the assistant for some rectum deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman they don''t sell rectum deodorant, and never have. Unfazed, the blonde assures the pharmacist that she has been buying the stuff from his store on a regular basis and would like some more. "I''m sorry," says the pharmacist, "we don''t have any." "But I always buy it here." says the blonde. "Do you have the container that it came in?" asks the pharmacist. "YES," said the blonde, "I''ll go home and get it." She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist who looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant" Annoyed, the blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container... "TO APPLY, PUSH UP BOTTOM."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redneck taped toilet paper to his television. He said, "Hey, lookie here, now we have free paper view!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the ant fall off the toilet bowl? A: He got pissed off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A road crew is making a giant freeway, when they come across a sign and a lever. The sign reads "pull lever and end world". The workers decide not to pull the lever just in case. One night, a man named Nate is driving home. He does not see the sign, so he gets out of his car, and crosses the road to pull the lever. But, on his way there, he was run over by the car, and was never to be seen again. The moral of the story? Better Nate Than Lever!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young husband with an inferiority complex insisted he was just a little pebble on the beach. The marriage counselor told him, "If you wish to save your marriage, you''d better be a little boulder."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newlywed couple was walking together, and needed to cross a busy street. They saw Officer Ed. He was controlling traffic, so he said to them in a sarcastic and nasty voice, "Oh, so you just want me to clear traffic so you snots can get across? Oh, sure, I''ll do that!" So the couple starts to thank him, when he says, "I don''t know why you''re walking on this nasty day, anyway! It''s just about to rain!" The couple looked up in the sky, but didn''t see a cloud in sight. They decided not to say anything, and went across the walkway as Officer Ed stopped the traffic. Although, sure enough, it started to rain as soon as they had crossed. It just so happens that the man and the woman were songwriters, and they wrote a classic Christmas tune. Oh, don''t you know it? It goes like this: "Rude Officer Ed knows the rain, dear..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was on a game show. He was on his final question; all he had to do was answer that question right, and he would win 1 million dollars! The game show host said, "All right, for your final question: ''What are the names of three of Santa''s reindeer?''" The man grinned and said, "Dasher!" The game show host said, "Correct!" "Comet!" "Correct! What is the last name?" The man yelled, "Olive!" The game show host was confused and said, "Why Olive?" The contestent looked at him strangely and said, "Oh, don''t you know? ''Olive, the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names...''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s weirder than a talking dog? A: A spelling bee!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s There? Cargo. Cargo Who? Car Go "Beep, Beep!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the news, Michael Jackson is broke and can''t even afford the payroll at Neverland Ranch. So the next time you see Michael with his hands in a 12-year-old''s pocket, he might just be looking for lunch money', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Live in a way such that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip. -- Will Rogers, Humorist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so broke, your bologna doesn''t have a first name.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kock-knock. Who''s there? Please. Please who? It''s the police! Open the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she goes to get the mail it measures on the Richter scale.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember- There''s a light at the end of every tunnel... just hope it''s not a train!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, "Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?" "I think so," the man replied. "My wife has made appetizers and we have a caterer coming to provide plenty of cookies and cakes for all of our guests." "I don''t mean that," the priest responded. "I mean, are you prepared spiritually?" "Oh, sure," came the reply. "I''ve got a keg of beer and a case of whiskey."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently, my redneck neighbors invited me to a party. Here was our conversation: "Hey dude! Where are you man? We''re having a great party over here. Why don''t you come on over and join us?" I replied, "Man, I''m not feeling so good. I think I''m gonna stay right here." "Well, hey. What''cha got?" they asked. "I got a case of diarrhea," I responded. "Well heck, bring it along. These fools will drink anything!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young woman had just purchased her dream car, a new Ferrari convertible, and was having trouble tuning her radio to a station she wanted. She returned to the dealership and confronted the salesman, complaining about the radio. "Miss," the salesperson said, "this is a very sophisticated radio. There is no requirement to use the buttons or dials. You merely give voice commands to whatever type of program you desire." So after she received her instructions, she headed out on the highway. "Country Music," she said, and instantly a country crooner was singing away on a country station. After a while she said, "Oldies," and instantly she heard "Blueberry Hill." A few minutes later, a guy in a new Cadillac cut her off in traffic. "Stupid, inconsiderate prick!" she yelled. The radio paused for a second, and then she heard, "Hello again and welcome back to the program. This is Dr. Phil."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gay man, finally deciding he could no longer hide his sexuality from his parents, went over to their house, and found his mother in the kitchen cooking dinner. He sat down at the kitchen table, let out a big sigh, and said, "Mom, I have something to tell you: I''m gay." His mother made no reply or gave any response, and the guy was about to repeat it to make sure she''d heard him, when she turned away from the pot she was stirring and said calmly, "You''re gay, doesn''t that mean you have oral sex with other men?" The guy said nervously, "Uh, yeah, Mum, that''s right." His mother went back to stirring the pot, then suddenly whirled around and WHACKED him over the head with her spoon and said, "Don''t you EVER complain about the taste of my cooking again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between boogers and broccoli? Kids don''t eat broccoli.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish my name was Gary Boone! Do you wanna know why? Because, then, my name could be goon... you see, because you take the "G" from Gary and the "oone" from Boone to get Goon! But, you know, that''s not the worst nickname. The person that does have the worst nickname is my friend, Phil Hart. I can''t even tell you what we call him...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "Johnny, what is the outside of a tree called?" Johnny: "I don''t know." Teacher: "Bark, Johnny, bark." Johnny: "Bow, wow, wow!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Enter MEXICO illegally. Never mind immigration quotas, visas, international law, or any of that nonsense. Once there, demand that the local government provide free medical carefor you and your entire family. Try driving around as a Gringo in Mexico with no liability insurance,and have an accident. Demand bilingual nurses and doctors. Demand free bilingual local government forms, bulletins, etc. Procreate abundantly. Deflect any criticism of this allegedly irresponsible reproductive behavior with, "It is a cultural UnitedStates thing. You would not understand, pal." Demand classes on American culture in the Mexican school system. Demand a local Mexican driver license. This will afford other legalrights and will go far to legitimize your unauthorized, illegal,presence in Mexico. Insist that local Mexican law enforcement teach English to all itsofficers. This will never work in the real world. So why do we let them do it to us?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The inmate on death row was scheduled to be put to death by firing squad the follow morning. Throughout the day, the prison guards were being very nice to him. But when they asked him if he wanted something specific for his last meal, he said he didn''t want anything special. When they asked if there was something special he wanted to do, he said nothing. It went on like this all day. Finally, when he was put before the firing squad, the guard asked if he wanted a cigarette and a blindfold. "No," the inmate said, "just get it over with." "Well, is there anything that I can do for you before you go?" said the guard. "You didn''t even want a special last meal!" The inmate thought. "Actually," he said, "Music is my life. One thing I would really like would be to sing my favorite song, one whole time through, with no interruptions." The guard nodded and told him to go ahead. The inmate started, "One billion bottles of beer on the wall..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family was having some people to dinner. At the table, the mother turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, "Dear, would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn''t know what to say," replied the little girl, shyly. "Just say what you hear Mommy say, sweetie," the woman said. Her daughter took a deep breath, bowed her head, and solemnly said, "Dear Lord, why the heck did I invite all these people to dinner!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marajiuana, Jack got high and unzipped his fly and Jill said I don''t wanna.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently a family court judge was interviewing a 15 yr. old boy, asking him which parent he wanted to live with, his mother or father? The kid said he didn''t want to live with either one -- that both of them beat him all the time. The kid said he wanted to live with the Dallas Cowboys -- they never beat anybody!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One drunk to another: "Have you ever been so drunk you''d kiss a woman''s stomach?" Second drunk: "I''ve been drunker than that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black female is having trouble with her menses. She goes to the gynecologist and he asks: "Mrs. Williams, what kind of flow do you have?" "Linoleum" she replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a prostitute, your mistress and your wife? The prostitute says, "Are you done yet?" Your mistress says, "You''re not done yet!" And your wife says, "Beige, I think we ought to paint the ceiling beige."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Indian chief addressing the tribe says: "I''ve got good news an bad news. The bad news is 5000 college students just moved next door to the reservation ... good news is, they taste like buffalo."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a "fox" and a "dog?" About 6 drinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know in 1923, the following men were considered some of the world''s most successful men . . . at least they found the secret of making money. Whereas, in 1987, more than 60 yrs. later, do you know what became of these men? The president of the largest steel company, Charles Schwab, died a pauper. The president of the largest gas company, Howard Hopson, went insane. The president of the New York Stock Exchange, Richard Whitney, was released from prison to die at home. The greatest wheat speculator, Arthur Cooger, died abroad insolvent. The president of the Bank of International Settlement shot himself and the greatest bear on Wall Street, Casabee Rivermore, died by suicide. The same year, 1923, the winner of the most important golf championship, Gene Sarazen, won the US Open and the PGA tournaments. Today he is still playing golf and is solvent. Conclusion: Stop worrying about business and play golf!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Liberals want to solve the marijuana problem by making it legal. Conservatives want to solve the wife-beating problem by making it legal. Liberals want to strike down all abortion laws, so that unwanted babies can be killed off before they''re born. Conservatives want to strike down the welfare laws, so that unwanted babies can be starved to death after they''re born. The conservative would prevent rape by locking up his wife and daughters. The liberal would prevent rape by legalizing prostitution. Neither considers locking up rapists, because the liberal says it''s society''s fault and the conservative says it costs too much money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s impossible to be a participant in the march of time and not get a few blisters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a girl named Rachel. She had a cat named Love. One day, Rachel was taking a shower. When she got out, she yelled for her cat, Love, but saw that the cat had escaped. She was still in her towel but she walked outside anyways. A cop pulled around the corner and said, "Excuse me, Miss. What are you doing out here?" Rachel replied, "Looking for Love!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nobody can breathe out of their nose and mouth at the same time. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * You know, 95% of the people who read this try to do it...well, it''s impossible!!! DUH!!!! (lol)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two brunettes and a blonde are attempting to fix a roof. While they are on the roof, a herd of cattle run by and knock down the ladder and leave a big pile of poop behind. The two brunettes decide to make the blonde check how deep the poop is so they can jump down. So the blonde jumps down and yells, "It''s only ankle deep." So the two brunettes jump down and scream, "What are you talking about?! It''s up to our heads!" And the blonde replies, "Well, I jumped in head first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Types Password* -Penis ~We''re sorry, the password you have entered isn''t long enough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma''s so fat that when she stepped on an air-plane she got arrested for 800 pounds of crack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are stuck in a foxhole with a cobra, Saddam Hussein, a lawyer, and only two bullets in your gun. What do you do? Shoot the lawyer twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke is kind of dated but it''s still funny. Al Gore, Bill, Hilary, and Chelsea Clinton were all riding in the Airforce One. Out of the blue Gore says, "I could throw a hundred, one dollar bills out the window and make a hundred people happy." Bill says, "Well I could throw ten, ten dollar bills out the window, and make ten people very happy." Hilary, not wanting to be left out, says "Well I could throw one, one hundred dollar bill out the window and make one person extremely happy." Chelsea rolled her eyes and said "Well i could throw all three of you out the window and make the whole nation happy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was in high school I had a friend who had a wooden eye (this was a long time ago). He was very insecure about it. Come senior year he didn''t have a date for the Prom. There was a beautiful girl he liked, but had a hairlip (this gave her an extreme lisp) we decided to set them up. He goes up to her and asks her out to the Prom. She said, "Oh, wouldn''t I, wouldn''t I?" and he said, "Hairlip, hairlip." and they never spoke again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is the year 2032, and a father and his son walk the streets of lower Manhattan. Approaching the site where the WTC used to be in the end of the 20th century, the father sighs and comments, "To think that right here used to be the Twin Towers." The son, not understanding, asks his father "What were the Twin Towers?" The father smiles and looks at the son, and explains, "The Twin Towers were two huge buildings that used to be here until 2001, when the Arabs destroyed them." The son looks up to his father, and asks, "And what are the Arabs?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks out into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You''re just like Dave." "Who?" "This guy named Dave. He always did everything right. Like my coming along when you needed a cab. It would have happened like that to Dave." "There are always a few clouds over everybody." "Not Dave. He was a terrific athlete. He could have gone on the pro tour in tennis. He could golf with the pros, too. He sang like an opera baritone, and danced like a Broadway star." "He was something, huh?" "Oh, you don''t know the half of it. He had a memory like a trap. Could remember everybody''s birthday. He knew all about wine, which fork to eat with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change one light on the Christmas Tree and I black out the whole neighborhood." "No wonder you remember him." "Well, you would too, if you''d married HIS WIDOW."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young woman asks her mother, "Mom, how many kind of penises are there?" The mother, surprised, answers, "Well, a man goes through three phases. In a man''s twenties, a man''s penis is like an oak, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree." "A Christmas tree?" "Yes, dried up and the balls are there for decoration only."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SON SAYS: Daddy, how was I born? DAD SAYS: Ah, well, my son, one day you will need to find out anyway! Mom and Dad got together in a chat room on MSN. Dad set up a date via e-mail with your mom and we met at a cybercafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, and then your mother downloaded from dad''s memory stick. As soon as dad was ready for an upload, it was discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall. Since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later the blessed little virus appeared. And that''s the story.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband and wife are doing the spring house cleaning. Wife asks husband to hang some new curtain rods, but he can''t do it without toggle bolts. He sends her to the hardware store where she asks the man behind the counter for two toggle bolts. He puts them on the counter, then asks, "You wanna screw for these?" "No," she replies, "but I''ll blow you for the clock radio on the shelf."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde do when her computer freezes? She sticks it in the microwave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister-in-law, a truck driver, had decided to get a dog for protection. As she inspected a likely candidate, the trainer told her, "He doesn''t like men." "Perfect," my sister-in-law thought and took the dog. Then one day she was approached by two men in a parking lot, and she watched to see how her canine bodyguard would react. Soon it became clear that the trainer wasn''t kidding. As the men got closer, the dog ran under the nearest car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Helen Keller''s favorite color? Corduroy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man was sitting in his favorite chair watching football when his wife walked up behind him and knocked him over the head with a frying pan. When he woke he asked, "What the hell was that for?!?" "I found this piece of paper in your pants while I was doing your laundry and it says Mary Lou 555-5555. Who the hell is Mary Lou?!?" she asks. "Aww honey, that''s the name of the horse I was bettin'' on last week!" "Oh I''m so sorry honey!" Three weeks later she came behind him and knocked him over the head with a frying pan and once again he woke up asking, "What the hell did I do this time?!?" "Your horse called," she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politics - A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is there an L in NOEL?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you put ''THE'' and ''IRS'' together, it''s an anagram of ''THEIRS''. Coincidence? I think not!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that when babies are born they only weigh like 7 lbs. yet the mom weighs 30 lbs. more? Why do they call the small candy bars the "fun sizes"? Wouldn''t be more fun to eat a big one? Why do people say PIN number when that truly means Personal Identification Number Number? If the handicapped bathrooms are for people who can''t walk why do they put them at the end of the bathrooms? Can someone give up lent for lent? Why do people say, "You''ve been working like a dog," when dogs just sit around all day? If marriage means you fell in love, does divorce mean you climbed out? And why isn''t the word ''gullible'' in the dictionary?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Starting from bottom to top, a short explanation of each body parts uses 1. Toe-Object used for balance(do blondes and drunks have toes? Food for thought) 2. Foot-Place in mouth after saying something stupid 3. Shin-Object used for finding furniture in the dark. 4. Pelvic area-pretty self explanatory 5. stomache- stom ACHE... coincidence? I think not. 6. Chest-What I like to talk to. 7.Fingers-Keep away from car doors. 9.Hands... 10. Elbow-I learned to dance after hitting this 11. Shoulder- Common site of burns. 12. Mouth- Place foot here(or other objects) 13. Brain- If you have one you noticed there is no eight. 14.1/2 brain-If you check for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You don''t like newbies. 2.You are #1 on this website. 3. You pretend to know everything. 4. You dislike AC3P1L07 5. You nail people for doing what you did. 6. You yell DUPE if someone you don''t know posts anything. 7. Coincidently you only report it if it really is. 8. You received a message from AC3P1L07 saying to f*** off 9. AC3P1L07 hates you. 10. Your user name is ANCHMIKE SO PISS IN SOMEONE ELSES CERIAL, I AM NOT TO BE TRIFLED WITH.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You don''t suffer from insomnia... you enjoy every minute of it. 2. Your pupils are dialated 24/7 3.*You don''t have time for a girlfriend and would rather have a talking frog instead. 4. L337 is a common word in your household. 5. The targeting reticle from halo is permanently burned onto your retina... and you love it. 6. You know the correct pronunciation of MJOLNIR. 7. You have a microwave in your room. 8. Your dog can beat your friends at halo. 9. Your pug, 30 pounds over weight can physically kick your butt. 10. You''ve memorized the entire halo soundtrack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning a husband took a pair of underwear out of the drawer. "What the...?," he said to himself as a little blue dust cloud appeared when he shook them out. "April!" he hollered into the bathroom, "Why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?" She shot back, "It''s not talcum powder. It''s ''Miracle Grow''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is not supposed to be funny. I want to make a public apology for the temper tantrum I threw earlier today. I still don''t get it but I am sorry for blaming everyone else for my problems. AC3P1L07 P.S. please vote this as funny so more people will see it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so skinny, when she wears striped PJ''s there''s only 2 stripes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a red head were swimming the breast stroke in a race. The blonde comes in last and says "Not to be a sore loser or anything, but I think the other girls were using their hands.".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bees can''t sting... The woman you like at work said yes... An Irishman walked out of a bar... I met a blonde with a brain... Kids are nice... Is there a Weed League?... Farts and flowers in the same sentence... I like Bill Gates... Lawyers have integrity... The lightbulb finally went on in Al Gore''s head... Doctors don''t fraternize with their nurses... Woman as president... Bill Clinton told the truth... Jeff Foxworthy in a suit... Priests involved with scandal admit what they did... Golf is not dull... Microsoft is better than Linux... Yo mamma is skinny, smart, and cleanly... People will like this joke... (I have included one for each category)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The girl knelt in the confessional and said, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned." "What is it, child?" "Father, I have committed the sin of vanity. Twice a day I gaze at myself in the mirror and tell myself how beautiful I am." The priest turned, took a good look at the girl and said, "My dear, I have good news. That isn''t a sin - it''s only a mistake."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin because he is not sure if sex is work or play. He asks a priest for his opinion on this question. The priest says after consulting the Bible, "My son, after an exhaustive search I am positive sex is work and is not permitted on Sundays." The man thinks: "What does a priest know of sex?" He goes to a minister, a married man, experienced, for the answer. He queries the minister and receives the same reply; Sex is work and not for the Sabbath! Not pleased with the reply, he seeks out the ultimate authority: a man of thousands of years tradition and knowledge - A rabbi. The rabbi ponders the question and states, "My son, sex is definitely play." The man replies," Rabbi, how can you be so sure when so many others tell me sex is work?!" The rabbi softly speaks, "If sex were work... my wife would have the maid do it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Timmy always sat in the front pew of the church and gave a hand full of change when the collection basket passed. One Sunday the pastor noticed that Timmy started to put his change in the collection basket but decided to put his money in his pocket instead. After service, Little Timmy rushed up to the pastor and wanted to hand him the handful of change, but the pastor proceeds to tell Timmy that he did not need the money and that he should put it in the basket instead. Little Timmy replies, "Oh no, father, you need it more than anyone else does, because my daddy says that you''re the poorest pastor we ever had."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the inexperienced terrorist who tried to blow up a bus? He burnt his mouth on the exhaust pipe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What is the difference between a leech and a lawyer? A:The leech stops sucking you dry after you''re dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma''s butt is so big when she sits down she''s three feet taller.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You wear a D... & A-C is tissue paper. 2. Your friends are guys, your partners are girls. 3. Anorexia is a four-letter word. 4. Pink is your favorite color... & hot pink is second. 5. Monika Lewinski is your role model. 6. You think foreign affairs is screwing two French guys. 7. M.U.D.D. means must use drugs daily. 8. ADIDAS means All Day I Dream About Sex. 9. ADIDAS applies to you. 10. It takes half of a lite beer to get you totally wasted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are all from my experiences. That''s why they''re funny. 1. You build a miniature boat out of a hostess box, water bottles, and duct tape, and float it down a river seven times. 2. You buy a headlamp, move it in circles on the wall, and say it follows wherever my head goes. 3. You make a hand with some sticks, a plastic soda bottle lid, some bugs, and a magnifying glass. 4. You pop each and every bubble on bubble wrap... in random order. 5. You line up thirteen megaphones just to see what it would do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Goldie, a middle aged Jewish woman goes to see a fortune-teller. "Two men are madly in love with me!" Goldie says. "Who will be the lucky one?" The swami answers...."Morris will marry you, and Irving will be the lucky one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You yell and scream for help, and when it comes you ask for the remote. 2. It is a workout to play high intensity video games. 3. You decide to be a republican because you bought a truck with a republican sticker on it. 4. You sell your step-brother''s stuff on e-bay for video game money. 5. You''ve hired someone to laugh at these jokes for you. 6. You shop online even though it''s more expensive because you don''t want to leave your house. 7. You died of a preventable illness because going to the doctor would take actual work. 8. You''ve hired someone to sleep with your wife because it''s to "hard". 9. You have the sofa in the back of the Guiness 2000 book. 10. You, your wife, and kids all live with your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(Linux is a server far superior to windows. It''s logo is Tux the digital penguin.) 1. Your favorite movie was Kill Bill. 2. Your favorite animal is a penguin. 3. You think micro and soft describe Bill Gates. 4. You would like to "server" Gates head. 5. Your desktop picture is of tux burning the windows flag. 6. Your motto is "W1ND0W$ 1$ 7H3 root 0F @LL 3V1L" 7. You can read the above statment. 8. You think XBOX was Microsoft''s first success. 9. You would rather have a computer from Hasbro than Microsoft. 10. Your computer can play solitaire. For you Windows users #6 means "Windows is the root of all evil".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so white and ugly Michael Jackson took one glance and thought he was looking into a mirror!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the witches favorite subject in school? SPELLing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Apricot. Apricot who? Apricot my key, open up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are cats similar to sentences? A: A cat has claws at the end of its paws; a sentence has pause at the end of its clause.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An abstract noun, the teacher said, "is something you can think of, but you can''t touch it. Can you give me an example of one?" "Sure," a teenage boy replied. "My father''s new car."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rick, fresh out of accounting school, went to an interview for a good paying job. The company boss asked various questions about him and his education, but then asked him, "What is three times seven?" "22," Rick replied. After he left, he double-checked the problem on his calculator (he KNEW he should have taken it to the interview!) and realized he wouldn''t get the job. About two weeks later, he got a letter that said he was hired for the job! He was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, but was still very curious. The next day, he went in and asked why he got the job, even though he got such a simple question wrong. The boss shrugged and said, "Well, you were the closest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man dies and finds himself standing third in line at the Pearly Gates. The Angel explains that admission requirements are now a bit more strict, as a few slum landlords and con artists have managed to slip into Heaven without being detected. He queries the first candidate: "What was your annual salary, and what was your profession?" "I made $150,000 as an Attorney" comes the reply. "You may enter" says the Angel. Second candidate, same question. "I made $95,000; I was a realtor." He is also permitted to enter. Now it is the third man''s turn. "My annual salary was $8,000." "Cool!" replies the Angel, "and what instrument did you play?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary had a little lamb, And a little pony too, She put the pony in a field, And the lamb into a stew!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('His death won''t be listed under "Obituaries," it will be under "Neighborhood Improvements."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1st woman: I took my son to the zoo yesterday. 2nd woman: Did they accept him?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Recite your tables to me, Joan. Joan: Dining table, kitchen table, bedside table...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1st man: My son was born on Saint David''s day, so I called him David. 2nd man: My son was born on Saint Patrick''s day, so I called him Patrick. 3rd man: Well, my son was born on Shrove Tuesday, so I called him Pancakes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Bush, Dan Quayle, Ross Perot, and Bill Clinton all traveled together to see the Wizard of Oz. Upon arrival, they were brought to see him. First, President Bush went to see the Wizard and said, "Everyone says I have no compassion or feelings, I wish to have a Heart," so the Wizard said, "So be it." Second was Dan Quayle. He told the Wizard, "People think I''m unintelligent and have no common sense whatsoever. I want a brain." The Wizard said, "So be it." Third to ask the Wizard was Ross Perot. "People say I have no confidence, and I lack conviction. I wish to have some courage." The Wizard granted this wish as well. Yhen Bill Clinton approached the Wizard. The Wizard looked at him and said, "Well, what do you want?" to which Clinton replied, "I''m here for Dorothy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, Bill Clinton was awakened by George Washington''s ghost in the White House. Clinton saw him and asked, "George, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" "Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did," advised George. The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson moved through the dark bedroom. "Tom, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" Clinton asked. "Cut taxes and reduce the size of government," advised Tom. Clinton didn''t sleep well the next night, and saw another figure moving in the shadows. It was Abraham Lincoln''s ghost. "Abe, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" Clinton asked. "Go to the theatre."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Ronald Reagan are in a boat in the Potomac, when suddenly the boat develops a leak. They have only one life preserver jacket. Bill says: "Let''s do the Democratic thing. Take a vote to see who gets the life preserver." They each write a name on a piece of paper and stuff it in a coffee can. Bush and Reagan get one vote each; Clinton gets six.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that in response to President Bill Clinton''s habit of dropping in on the local McDonalds, the McDonald''s national management has announced a commemorative double cheeseburger, the McClinton? Of course, when you get it, the price has doubled, you never get the fries you were originally promised, and it''s got half the meat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before his infamous haircut on the tarmac, Clinton asked his stylist Christophe, "How long will this take, how much will it cost, and how good will this look?" Christophe replied just ten minutes, cost $20, and look marvelous. An hour and fifteen minutes later, Clinton looked into the mirror in horror and Christophe handed him a bill for $200. Clinton gasped, "You took too long, it doesn''t look that great, and it is costing me ten times more than you said!" Christophe replied, "That makes us even."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Hillary were going down a back road and stopped at a gas station. As the worker was filling up their car, he said to Hillary, "I went to high school with you". She recognized him and agreed with him. Later, as they were driving down the road, Bill said, "If you had married him you wouldn''t be married to the President." Hillary said, "Oh yes, I would - he would be President."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was Arbor Day, and a blonde, a brunette and a redhead all planted something. The redhead planted flowers in her front yard. The brunette planted a tree in her back yard. The blonde didn''t know what to plant, so she asked the redhead. "Plant something that looks good," she said. The blonde still didn''t know what to plant, so she asked the brunette. "Plant something you want more of," she said. The blonde finally knew what to plant. The next day,her husband was declared a missing person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was watching television when there was a knock on the door. He answered it, but only a snail was there. So he picked it up and threw it into the street. Two years later, the man heard another knock on the door. He opened the door and it was the snail again. The snail says, "What was that all about?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pope John Paul II gets to heaven. St. Peter says, "Frankly, you''re lucky to be here." The Pope says, "Why? What did I do wrong on earth?" St. Peter says, "God was very angry with your stance on women becoming priests." The Pope says, "He''s mad about THAT?" St. Peter says, "She''s furious."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple is at an Art exhibition, and they are looking at a portrait that has them a little taken aback. The picture depicts 3 very black, very naked men, sitting on a park bench; 2 have a black penis, and the one in the middle has a pink penis. As the couple is looking somewhat puzzled at the picture, the artist walks by and says "Can I help you with this painting. I''m the artist who painted it." The man says "Well, we like the painting but don''t understand why you have 3 African men on a bench, and the one in the middle has a pink penis, while the other two have black penises." The artist says "Oh, you are misinterpreting the painting. They''re not African men, they are Irish coal miners and the one in the middle went home for lunch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it weren''t for electricity, we''d all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so dumb, she was killed in a pie eating contest when the cow sat on her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dog went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog: "There are only nine words here. You could send another ''Woof'' for the same price." The dog replied, "But that would make no sense at all."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you have when there are 100 rabbits standing in a row and they all start hopping backwards? A: Receding hare line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reporters asked Dan Quayle what he thought of Roe v. Wade? His response: "Two alternate ways to cross the Potomac."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the "O" and the "N" stand for in ''CLEMSON''? The "O" is for honor, and the "N" for knowledge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever hear about the Polish athlete who won a gold medal? He had it bronzed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 6 year old was in a car with her parents. She kept having sneezing fits, and she kept splattering snot all over the seats. Eventually, the Mum and Dad gave up on trying to stop the sneezing, and told the little girl to put her hands up when she sneezed. The little girl did so, raising her hands above her head, and sneezed on the Mum''s face!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Texan: "Where are you from?" Harvard graduate: "I come from a place where we do not end our sentences with prepositions." Texan: "OK, where are you from, Jackass?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two weasels are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, "I slept with your mother!" The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do. The first again yells, "I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!" The other says, "Go home dad you''re drunk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk. 9. Our love will never become cold and hollow Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow. 8. I bought this Valentine''s card at the store In hopes that, later, you''d be my whore. 7. This feels so good, it feels so right I just wish it wasn''t $250 a night. 6. You''re a woman of style, you''re a woman of class Especially when I''m spanking, your big-round-fat ass. 5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished But now I''m fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!! 4. Through all the things that came to pass Our love has grown. . . but so''s your ass. 3. You''re a honey. . . and you''re a cutie I just wished you had J-Lo''s "booty". 2. I don''t wanna be sappy or silly or corny So, right to the point, let''s do it, I''m horny! 1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister, you should check out the one that I gave to your sister!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s There? Tank. Tank Who? You''re Welcome!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the tornado say to the pecan tree? "Hold onto your nuts, this is not your average blow job!" What has four hands and eats aunts? Two uncles. What do you get when you cross an onion with a donkey? Usually an onion with long ears, but sometime you get a piece of ass that will make your eyes water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Jewish dilemma? A free ham sandwich.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? A: Eileen. Q: What do you call a boy with one foot in the door? A: Justin. Q: What do you call a girl who gambles? A: Betty. Q: What do you call a girl with one foot on either side of the river? A: Bridget. Q: What do you call a man with a spade on his head? A: Doug. Q: What do you call a girl with only one pants leg? A: Jean. Q: What do you call a man who''s a talented painter? A: Art. Q: What do you call a man with a car on his head? A: Jack. Q: What do you call a lady in the distance? A: Dot. Q: What do you call a girl with a frog on her head? A: Lily. Q: What do you call a man with numbers down his front? A: Bill. Q: What do you call a man in a pile of leaves? A: Russel. Q: What do you call a man with a rabbit on his head? A: Warren. Q: What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? A: Cliff. Q: What do you call a man who steals a lot? A: Robin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are fishing. One catches a magic fish that will grant each one a wish if they let him go. The first one wishes he could double his IQ. It is done. The second one wishes to triple his IQ. It is done. The last one (who is an idiot) wishes to multiply his IQ by a 1/2. The fish asks if he is sure; the man nods. When the fish grants his wish, he turns into a blond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Actual bumper sticker on a jeep (the writing was upside down). "If you can read this, flip me over!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has wheels and flies? Answer: Garbage truck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You don''t have to go faster than the bear, you just have to go faster than the slowest guy running from the bear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Wile Coyote had enough money for all that Acme crap, why didn''t he just buy dinner? If there''s an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule? Why do we leave expensive cars in the driveway, when we keep worthless junk in the garage? Why do they call it taking a dump? Shouldn''t it be leaving a dump? Why is it good to be a Daddy''s girl, but bad to be a Momma''s boy? Aren''t you tired of people asking you rhetorical questions and you don''t know if they are rhetorical questions or not? If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose? Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog''s face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car, he sticks his head out the window! If quitters never win, and winners never quit, who came up with, "Quit while you''re ahead"? If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What are the strongest days of the week? A. Saturday and Sunday, because all the rest are week days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so poor, I saw her walking down the street with one shoe, and I said, "Hey, you lost a shoe." And she said, "No, I found one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "Okay!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Goriest, Scariest, Yuckiest Top 12 Things You Really Don''t Want To See Written In Blood... 12) "Richard Hillman did it and------" 11) "Can you guess where your friends are?" 10) Your name signed on a Microsoft License Agreement 9) "Remember that kid you picked on during Junior Cert year..." 8) Your name on the bottom of a contract from Fianna Fail. (Irish government party) 7) "See! I can spell! Yor next" 6) "Luke, I am your father." 5) "Where the feck are the Elastoplasts?" 4) Your overdue Visa bill 3) "Does anyone have a spare Tampax?" 2) "Did yez ever wonder what happened to the blood you donated?" 1) "Dude you''re gettin'' a Dell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters: BEST IN PRAYER ASTRONOMER: When you rearrange the letters: MOON STARER DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letters: A ROPE ENDS IT THE EYES: When you rearrange the letters: THEY SEE SLOT MACHINES: When you rearrange the letters: CASH LOST IN ME ANIMOSITY: When you rearrange the letters: IS NO AMITY ELECTION RESULTS: When you rearrange the letters: LIES - LET''S RECOUNT ELEVEN PLUS TWO: When you rearrange the letters: TWELVE PLUS ONE SNOOZE ALARMS: When you rearrange the letters: ALAS! NO MORE Z ''S A DECIMAL POINT: When you rearrange the letters: IM A DOT IN PLACE AND FINALLY... MOTHER-IN-LAW: When you rearrange the letters: WOMAN HITLER', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) Umm... 2) Well... 3) Hmmm, er... 4)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('* "On the advice of our solicitors, this T-shirt bears no message at this time". * "That''s it! I''m calling me granny" (seen on a seven-year-old) * "Rehab is for quitters" * "My dog can lick anyone" * "Party - my cot - 2 a.m." (on a baby-size T-shirt) * "If a woman''s place is in the home WHY AM I ALWAYS IN THIS FECKIN'' CAR!" * "They call it ''PMT'' cos ''Mad Cow Disease'' was already taken" * "A picture is worth a thousand words - but it uses up a thousand times the memory." * "HAM AND EGGS - a day''s work for a chicken; a lifetime commitment for a pig." * "Computer programmers don''t byte, they nybble a bit." * "The trouble with life is there''s no background music." * "The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson." * "Two rights do not make a wrong. They make an airplane." * "Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Walking by, a minister saw his 5-year-old son and playmates find a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, the children had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister''s son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaather, and unto the Sonnn... and into the hole he gooooes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his love had a terrible spat: She scratched his face and he knocked her flat; She spat at him and he threw her around; She jumped from behind and he fell to the ground. How sad to see such trouble as that... Between a man and his household cat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly her reflection quit. Yo momma so old that when I slapped her back her boobs fell off. Yo momma so fat when she stepped in the deepest part of the ocean, she got her foot wet. Yo momma so old and fat, she told us about the story of how she farted and killed all the dinosaurs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When kids say: The party is supervised = It''s supervised by a grandparent who falls asleep most of the time. I''m doing well in school = Oh crap, I need help. It''s okay, I don''t need help = Get the heck away from me. When men say: Hi honey, how are you? = I''ve been cheating on you for the last 2 months, or, I cheated on you last night. When women say: I''m too tired to make dinner = Who do you think I am making dinner for you every night? Can''t a woman take a frickin'' break?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the little chick say when his mom laid an orange? A: Look at the orange-mama-lade!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('aaaaa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A neutron walks into a bar and asks, "How much for a drink?". The bartender replies, "For you, no charge".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('About four or five years ago I was standing in a ticket line at LAX, and a fellow in a line parallel to mine had a golf bag slung over his shoulder. Since the line was long and airline ticketing is a slow process at best, we struck up a conversation. He brightened when I admired his golf bag, and he proudly stated that he was on the PGA Tour. Then he turned to me and asked the question all golfers ask: "Do you play?" I shook my head, "I used to, but I quit because I wasn''t very good. I shot consistently in the low seventies." There was a long, low in-take of breath, then "The low seventies?" "Yes," I admitted. "Consistently?" he queried admiringly. "Every hole," I confessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What''s that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you''re too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you''re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating... You finish off as an orgasm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful ... CAREFUL!! Put in some more butter!! Oh my Gosh!! You''re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY!! Turn them!! TURN THEM NOW!! We need more butter. Oh my Gosh!! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?! They''re going to STICK!! Careful ... CAREFUL!! I said be CAREFUL!! You NEVER listen to me when you''re cooking! Never!! Turn them! HURRY UP!! Are you CRAZY? Have you lost your mind? Don''t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!!" The wife stared at him. "What the &^%$&^% is wrong with you? You think I don''t know how to fry a couple of eggs?" The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I''m driving".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. M.U.D.D.- Must use Drugs Daily 2. A.D.I.D.A.S.-All day I Dream About Sex 3. P.M.S.- Pretty Mean Stuff 4. F.B.I. Federal Beauro of Idiots 5. C.I.A.-Clueless Idiots Agency 6. N.C.I.S.-Neurologically Challenged Imbocil Society 7. P.h.D. Pretty Happy Dyke 8. U.C.L.A. Unidentified Cunt Lickers Anonymous 9. A.R.A. Agency- Anti Redundancy Agency 10. N.R.A.- Never Redundant Agency', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a father and his daughter were driving down the street when the father said, "Look! A bunny. Can you say bunny, bu-nny?" "Bunny!" the daughter replied. They suddenly felt the car go over a bump. Then the girl said, " Daddy, its not a bunny anymore." "What is it then?" he asked. The daughter replied, "Can you say roadkill, road-kill?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went to her regular plastic surgion one day. When she walked in, he said to her, "What more can I do for you? I have changed your every part of your body that you could think of! I even did your ears!" She replied, "Well, this is kind of embarrasing for me say out loud." The plastic surgion, curious to know what the blonde wanted done, asked, "What is it? You can trust me. She answered shyly. "This morning, while I was looking in the mirror, I noticed that my butt had a huge crack down the middle and i was wondering if you could get me a new one that isn''t broken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went to the eye doctor one day. She complained to the doctor that she couldn''t see and was having a hard time driving because of this. He then told her that she would need glasses. The blond knowing that the glasses would cost a couple of hundred dollars decided to save her money because she remembered she had some at home. She then told the doctor that she had a pair. He said, "OK, wear them all the time." The blonde left and went home. She called the doctor and told him she couldn''t see so he scheduled an appointment and told her to bring her glasses so he could see them. The next day the blond came in holding up two drinking glasses to her eyes and told the doctor "I had a hard time driving over here because my hands were all tied up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman was on duty when he got a complaint, so he went to go check it out. The complaint was that a sport car had not moved from a corner and was holding up traffic. When he got there, he went to the car and asked the blonde lady in it why she was holding up traffic and not going. She responded well the sign told me to stop but it doesn''t want to let me go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What'' did the bra say to the hat? You go on ahead, I''ll give these two a lift.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a male farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. Of course the farmer is a blond. :) He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing. The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks him, "Er... excuse me mister, but what are you doing?" The farmer replies, "I''m trying to win a Nobel Prize." "How?" asks the man, puzzled. "Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize to people who are out standing in their field!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid, she looked in the Cd player for her cassette tape!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young girl had just begun to go to a new Christian church group. She had been going for a couple of weeks now, and at one session their leaders were talking about when they found Jesus in their lives. One of her leaders had started saying: "When I was your age, I had just gotten Jesus in my life." She replied, "Well, how long has it been that you have had Jesus in your life?" He replied, "35 years of my life." Then she said,"God Damn, that''s a long time"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a seafood disco last week and pulled a mussel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you want to make someone laugh, use this line: Sorry. say that again. I couldn''t hear you over my fart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time there was 2 rednecks Bob and John. They were best friends. Bob had just gone bankrupt so he asked John if he could move in with him. Now John didn''t have a big house like Bob use to have but agreed to let him stay there till he got out of bankruptcy. The next day when Bob moved in, while at dinner Bob said: "John you know what?" John said:"What is it Bob?" "I thought my house was shitty. Then i came to yours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know Adam wasnt black? Have you ever tried to take a rib away from a black man? How do you know when Mexicans are illegal? When you scream "La Migra", and everybody is gone in less than a minute. How do you know when a white guy''s family is really white? When he tries to be black or mexican.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night an 87 year old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92 year old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor assisted living apartment, killing him instantly. She was brought before the court on a charge of murder. The judge asked her if she had anything to say in her defense. She began coolly, "Yes, your honor, I figured that at 92, if he could have sex... he could fly!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the coach go to the bank? To get his quarter back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Your tires cost more than your car. 2.You have a motor hanging out of your tree. 3.Your trailer house tires work but your car tires don''t. 5.You write the girl of your dreams name on the tower and then the sheriff makes you take your sisters name off of it. 6.You call your undies britches. 7.The whole town is related to you. 8.You got more trailers than cars. 9.You kill your sisters boyfriends because they''re trying to take her away from you. 10. Your haven''t had "School learning" because you don''t now how to count. (You missed that there was no number 4.) Credit to BLUE COLLAR TV', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home from work one day and he says to his wife, "Honey, I got a new secretary, and imagine what happened! She''s got a red and white bra. You know, these are the colors of my favorite football team. Anyway, it''s not a big deal but it feels good." The next day when he came home his wife asks, "How was your day?" The man say, "Fantastic! It''s not only her bra that is red and white but also her panties. You know it''s not a big deal but it really feels good!" The third day he comes home after work and now the man asks his wife, "And what happened today in your office, honey?" She says, "Oh, nothing special, sweetheart. I got a new boss today. His dick is two inches longer than yours. You know it''s not a big deal but hell, it feels good!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does Donald Trump say before he lights off a fire work? A:You`re fired!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a recent vacation in Atlantic City, a couple went to see a popular magic show. After one especially amazing feat, a woman from the back of the theater yelled out, "Hey, how''d you do that?" "I could tell you, madam," the magician answered, "But then I''d have to kill you." After a short pause, she yelled back, "Ok, then... Just tell my husband!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mamma so fat that her nickname is you gonna eat that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two redneck airplane mechanics named Jim Bob and Jeb work at the Atlanta airport. Atlanta gets fogged in one night and nothing can take off or land so Jim Bob and Jeb have nothing to do. After work Jim Bob and Jeb usally have a drink on their way home, so Jim Bob says to Jeb, "I heard that you can get a buzz off drinking jet fuel." Since they have nothing better to do, they decide to try it. The next morning Jim Bob calls Jeb and asks, "How are you feeling?" Jeb says, "Fine, never felt better." Jim Bob asks, "Do you have a hangover?" Jeb says "no." Then he says, "Wow this is great! We can drink all we want and not get a hangover." Then Jim Bob says, "Well, there is one side effect, have you farted yet?" Jeb says, "No, why?" Jim Bob says, "I''m calling you from Detroit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought Graceland was tacky. No kids in the back of the pick-up, it''s not safe. Do you think my hair is too big? Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace? The tires on that truck are too big. I''ve got it all on a floppy disk. Do you think this baseball cap goes with this shirt? Damned if that politician ain''t honest! We''re vegetarians. I''ll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy. You can''t feed that to the dog. Trim the fat off that steak. I just love the opera. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso. Wrasslin''s fake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were orphaned when you were a child, I feel sorry for you, but not for your parents. If you don''t want to give people a bad name, you will have your children illegitimately. Is your name Laryngitis? You''re a pain in the neck. Is your name Dan Druff? You get into people''s hair. I hear you pick your friends -- to pieces!! I bet your brain feels as good as new, seeing that you''ve never used it. They say that two heads are better than one. In your case, one would have been better than none. You should toss out more of your funny remarks; that''s all they''re good for. People can''t say that you have absolutely nothing! After all, you have inferiority! You must have a low opinion of people if you think they''re your equals. I wish you were all here. I don''t like to think there is more! If we were to kill everybody who hates you, it wouldn''t be murder; it would be genocide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you sink a canadian submarine? A: You swim underneath it and knock on the door', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can be sure someone is an idiot when he/she: Spends twenty minutes looking at an orange juice box because it said concentrate. Puts lipstick on their forhead because he wanted to makeup his mind. Gets stabbed in a shoot-out. Sends a fax with a stamp on it. Was on the corner giving out potato chips yellin'' "Free Lays!" Tries to drown a fish. If you gave them a penny for their intelligence, you''d get change. Thinks socialism means partying. Trips over a cordless phone. Takes a rule to bed to see how long they slept. At the bottom of the application where it says "Sign Here" he put Sagittarius." Takes 2 hours to watch 60 minutes. Studies for a blood test and fails. Invents a solar powered flashlight. Sells the car for gas money. Heard 90% of all crimes occur around the home, he moves. Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 bus twice instead. Takes you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport left", he turned around and went home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I sent flowers to someone who was moving to Florida for a job promotion. I also sent flowers the same day to a funeral for a friend. I found out later that the flower shop got the cards mixed up. They sent the card to the guy who was moving that said, "Deepest Condolences," and sent the card to the funeral home that said, "I know it''s hot where you''re going, but you deserve it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother complained to a doctor about her daughter''s strange eating habits. "All day long she lies in bed and eats yeast and car wax. What will happen to her?" "Don''t worry," said the doctor. "Eventually, she''ll rise and shine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she tripped on 4th Ave. and she landed on 12th!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One dog said to her pups, "Don''t ever bite the hand that feeds you. Any other hand is ok, though."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy walked up to a man and asked, "Hey mister, wanna donate to the WE NEED HELP children''s fund?" the man said, "No, but I will donate a pack of listerine bottles because I hope all of the kids'' breath don''t smell as bad as yours!" (real life situation)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl is helping her mommy with the dishes when she notices that some of her hairs are gray. She asks her mom, "Why are some of your hairs gray?" The mom replies cleverly, "Whenever you make me cry or lie to me, one of my hairs turn gray." The girl thinks for a minute, and then asks, "Is that why all Grandma''s hairs are gray?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where is Spiderman''s home page? A: On the world wide web. Q: Why is Superman stupid? A: Because he wears his underwear over his pants. Q: Why is Batman more stupid? A: Because he wears his underwear over his pants and puts on a belt over his underwear. Q: Why is Robin even more stupid? A: Because he followed what batman did. Q: Why is Wonder Woman stupid? A: Because she wears a belt on her head. Q: Why is Spiderman the most stupid superhero of them all? A: Because he wears his underwear over his head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a lawyer''s office and inquired about the lawyer''s rates. "Fifty dollars for three questions," replied the lawyer. "Isn''t that awfully steep?" asked the man. "Yes," the lawyer replied, "and what is your third question?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re ghetto when you carry food stamps in a money clip!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three men at a bar. One man got drunk and started a fight with the other two men. The police came and took the drunk guy to jail. The next day the man went before the judge. The judge asked the man, "Where do you work?" The man said, "Here and there." The judge asked the man, "What do you do for a living?" The man said, "This and that." The judge then said, "Take him away." The man said, "Wait, judge when will I get out?" The judge said to the man, "Sooner or later."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men can''t pack a bag. Men wouldn''t be caught dead wearing red velvet. Men would feel their masculinity is threatened... having to be seen with all those elves. Men don''t answer their mail. Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described, even in jest, as anything remotely resembling a "bowlful of jelly." Men aren''t interested in stockings unless somebody''s wearing them. Having to do the "Ho, Ho, Ho," thing would seriously inhibit their ability to pick up women. Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun had to use the bathroom, so she went into a bar, the first place she could find. She noticed that every time the lights went out, everybody cheered. She went up to the bartender and asked him why. He said she would be better off not knowing, so she asked where the bathroom is. He gave her directions. When she got there she saw a big naked statue with a fig leaf covering you-know-where. When she exited the bathroom everybody cheered. She asked the bartender why, and he replied,"Every time someone lifts the fig leaf, the lights go out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of shoes do you wear to the beach? SANDals!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? A little old lady. A little old lady who? I didn''t know you could yodel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Unitarian Universalist walks into a fabric store and asks the clerk for nine yards of material. The clerk asks, "What are you going to make?" The UU says, "I''m making a nightgown for myself as a present for my husband." The clerk says, "But nine yards is way too much material for a nightgown." The UU says, "I know, but my husband would rather seek than find."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dogs have masters, cats have staff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you leave a message on this thing? I can''t understand the instructions. Hello. Testing 1 2 3. I wonder what happens if I touch this... YOW! You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, "We aren''t in, leave a message." That''s why I''ve decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me... Drawling granny voice: Way back inna winner of fifty-two, we didn'' have fanshy gadjets like no ansherin'' machine. You jusht had to call and call until shummbody got home. Now, shum people, dey shay dey don'' like ''em, but I shay it''ll shave you a lotta trouble if you jusht leave a meshage. Thanksh a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A red-faced judge convened court after a long lunch. The first case involved a man charged with drunk driving who claimed it simply wasn''t true. "I''m as sober as you are, your honor," the man claimed. The judge replied, "Clerk, please enter a guilty plea. The defendant is sentenced to 30 days in jail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The National Institutes of Health have announced that they will no longer be using rats for medical experimentation. In their place, they will use attorneys. They have given three reasons for this decision: 1. There are now more attorneys than there are rats. 2. The medical researchers don''t become as emotionally attached to the attorneys as they did to the rats. 3. No matter how hard you try, there are some things that rats won''t do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two college students, Frank and Matt, are riding on a New York City subway when a beggar approaches them asking for spare change. Frank adamantly rejects the man in disgust. Matt, on the other hand, whips out his wallet, pulls out a couple of singles and gladly hands them over to the beggar with a smile. The beggar thanks him kindly and then continues on to the other passengers. Frank is outraged by his friend''s act of generosity. "What on earth did you do that for?" shouts Frank., "You know he''s only going to use it on drugs or booze." Matt replies, "And we weren''t?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. Who''s There? Yule. Yule who? Yule never know until you open the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are hairdressers always on time? A: Because they know all the short cuts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top Ten Things Men Understand About Women... 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wait a second!!! I am NOT a loser! I have tried. I am a failure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid that she forgot where she parked her car in an empty parking lot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the male rabbit buy the female rabbit for her birthday? 14 carrot gold!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the glass fool anybody? Because everybody could see right through him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you tell when a bucket gets sick? A: It becomes a little pale.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a restaraunt and asks for fish and chips. When she sees the fries on her plate she says "I asked for chips, not fries!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond is in math class. The teacher says, "We are going to be learning about pi (3.14) today. Does anyone know what that is?" The blond says "I do. I made a cherry one this morning."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Candy Candy who? Candy have some sweets? Please!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gent spots a nice looking girl in a bar goes up and starts small talk. Seeing that she didn''t back off, he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. "That''s a nice name," he said warming up the conversation. "Who named you, your mother?" "No, I named myself," she answered. "Oh, that''s interesting. Why Carmen?" "Because I like cars, and I like men," she said. "So, what''s your name?" she asked. "Beerf$%^."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Snowflake. Snowflake who? There''s snowflake like home!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Courtney: Let''s see who can stay up the longest tonight. Kaitlyn: I know! We''ll pinch each other every ten minutes to make sure we don''t fall asleep! Starting right NOW! Courtney: Hey, I''m not even tired! Kaitlyn: See, my plan is working!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dinosaur that is able to give you a synonym for any word you give him? Answer: A Thesaurus! :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. The Yankees General Manager''s name is Brian Cashman. 2. Barry Bonds'' initals are BB, the abreviation for a walk is also BB.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What key opens no lock? A Monkey!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What key opens no lock? A Turkey!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Hodja (teacher) was selling olives at the market and business was slow. He called to a woman who was passing by and tried to entice her. She shook her head and told him she didn''t have any money with her."No problem," the Hodja grinned. "You can pay me later." She still looked hesitant, so he offered her one to taste. "Oh no, I can''t, I''m fasting," she responded. "Fasting? But Ramadan was 6 months ago!" "Yes, well, I missed a day and I''m making it up now. Go ahead and give me a kilo of the black olives." "Forget it!" shouted the Hodja. "If it took you 6 months to pay back a debt you owed ALLAH, who knows when you''ll get around to paying me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a big moron and a little moron, sitting on a ledge. The big moron fell off. Why? Because the little moron was a little more on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t let your mind wander. It''s too small to be out on its own.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cathy was looking through the window of a clothes store when she spotted a pair of short-shorts. "Wow, these pants are half off!" she told her uncle. Her uncle said "They should be, they are only a half pair of pants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an ice-cream? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - A motorcycle, it has no wheels. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Hehe, you should have seen your face!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Divorced Jewish man seeks partner to attend shul with, light Shabbos candles, celebrate holidays, build Sukkah together, attend brisses and Bar Mitzvahs. Religion not important. ***** Israeli professor, 41, with 18 years of teaching in my behind. Looking for American-born woman who speaks English very good.I am a sensitive Jewish prince to whom you can open your heart to share your innermost thoughts and deepest secrets. Confide in me. I''ll understand your insecurities. No fatties, please. ***** Jewish male, 34. Very successful, smart, independent, self-made. Looking for girl whose father will hire me. ***** Single Jewish woman, 29, into disco, mountain climbing, skiing, track and field. Has slight limp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church board after the service. The first man to arrive was a stranger. "You misunderstood my announcement. This is a meeting of the board," said the minister. "I know," said the man. "If there is anyone here more bored than I am, I''d like to meet him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were the teacher''s eyes crossed? She couldn''t control her pupils!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lisa was playing bowling with her friend Marie. Lisa got a strike, then one more strike. Then, she got another strike. She had just gotten 3 strikes in a row! "I just got 3 strikes in a row!" said Lisa. Marie said, "You''re out, you just got 3 strikes in a row!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gazelle goes out for her usual afternoon walk. About an hour later, she realizes that she is lost out in the open. Unskilled in the ways of the real world, she asks a cheetah, "Excuse me sir, do you know what time it is?" With a grin, the cheetah said, "It''s lunchtime."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the answer to this riddle? What is greater than God, More evil than the devil, The poor have it, The rich need it, And if you eat it, you''ll die? A: Nothing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do the Star Trek Enterprise and toilet paper have in common? A: They both circle around Uranus searching for Klingons!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been debating buying a vehicle for weeks. He wanted a truck. She wanted a fast little sports car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range. "Look!" she said, "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in just a few seconds. Nothing else will do. My birthday is coming up. so surprise me!" He did just that, so for her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale. Nobody has seen or heard from him since.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In my holiday to one Asian country, I happened to make a friendship with a local guy while I was drinking a softdrink Fanta. He speaks broken English, but I can fairly understand him. I offered him a softdrink, to that he choose Coco Cola. The guy was showing some postcard of Mountains to me. They are really beautiful and just remarked "Fantastic!". I also showed him some beautiful pictures of country side stored in my digital camera, where I have trekked. To my surprise! Can you guess what was his remark? ... ... ... ... ... ... He remarked "Coco Colastic!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make one disappear? Add the letter g, to make it GONE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the man put his money in the freezer? He wanted cold hard cash!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the porcupine say to the cactus? "Is that you, mommy?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb, she tried to fix breaking news!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a cat''s favorite part of the computer? The mouse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a ghost''s least favorite room in a house? -The living room', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Olive Olive who? Olive you!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the kid walk backwards to school? Because it was back to school day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do spell mousetrap with only three letters? C-A-T', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was this Australian guy, an English guy, and an American guy. They all went into a furniture store to by a chair that played music when you sat on it (aka musical chair). The next day the Australian guy comes back and says he wants to return the chair. When the clerk asks why he says it''s too hard, so the clerk gives him his money back. The day after that the English guy comes back and says he wants to return the chair and again when the clerk asks why, he says it was too hard. So the clerk gives him his money back. The next day the American guy comes back and asks to return the chair. The clerk, getting somewhat annoyed by this time, says, "Let me guess, it''s too hard right?" The American guy says, "No, the chair plays the National Anthem so whenever I sit down I have to stand up again, but then the music stops so I sit down and stand up! Up, down, up, down and so on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One eye says to the other eye, "Between you and me, something smells."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does a judge eat lunch? At the food court!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did 3 blonds jump off the building? To see if their maxi-pads had wings!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Kentucky horse breeder had a filly that won every race in which she was entered. But as she got older she became very temperamental. He soon found that when he raced her in the evening, she would win handily, but when she raced during the day she would come in dead last. He consulted the top veterinarians and horse psychologists to no avail. He finally had to give up because it had become a real night mare.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her classes: "A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars. One-fifth is to go to his wife, one-fifth is to go to his son, one-sixth to his butler, and the rest to charity. Now, what does each get?" After a very long silence in the classroom, Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher called on Little Johnny for his answer. With complete sincerity in his voice, Little Johnny answered, "A lawyer!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that heaven and hell are actually right next to each other? They are seperated by a big chain-link fence. Well, one day hell was having a big party and it got a little out of hand. God heard the ruckus and arrived to find his fence completely smashed by the wild partiers. He called the devil over and said "Look, Satan, you have to rebuild this fence." Satan agreed. The next day God noticed that the devil had completely rebuilt the fence...but it was 2 feet further into heaven than before. "Satan!" beckoned God. "You have to take that fence down and put it back where it belongs!" "Yeah? What if I don''t?" replied the devil. "I''ll sue you if I have to," answered God. "Sure," laughed Satan. "Where are you going to find a lawyer?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Employer: "In this job we need someone who is responsible." Applicant: "I''m the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three youngsters are having hot discussion, about whose father is the tallest one. The first one said, "My father is just like statue of Liberty. Your hat will fall off if you look at him" The second one does not want to loose the discussion. He added, "That''s nothing! You can not see my father''s hands, when he stands up and waves. They vanish in the clouds". The third one, a born winner in the discussion, confidently added, "Did your father''s hands feel something, when he was waving in the clouds?" The second one replied confidently that he is going to win the discussion, "Why, certainly, he once told me his hands felt something up in the clouds and he tried to pull that." The third one said, "That something was my father''s under pant. He once complained that they are being pulled by someone while standing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JUST because I have a short attention span doesn''t mean I', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I die I want to go peacefully - like my grandfather did - in his sleep. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no phone books in China? Because there are so many Wing''s and Wong''s, they are afraid you will Wing the Wong number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new muslim air mattress? It blows itself up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t you have a terribly empty feeling - in your skull?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken go across the field? Because the referee shouted "FOWL"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are walking down the street when a mugger approaches them and demands their money. They both grudgingly pull out their wallets and begin taking out their cash. Just then one guy turns to the other and hands him a bill. "Here''s that $20 I owe you," he says.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a passenger flight, the pilot comes over the public address system as usual and to greet the passengers. He tells them at what altitude they''ll be flying, the expected arrival time, and a bit about the weather, and advises them to relax and have a good flight.. Then, forgetting to turn off the microphone, he says to his co-pilot, "What would relax me right now is a cup of coffee and a blowjob." All the passengers hear it. As a stewardess immediately begins to run toward the cockpit to tell the pilot of his slip-up, one of the passengers stops her and says "Don''t forget the coffee!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo, and I''m thinking, okay, here''s a gal who''s capable of making a decision she''ll regret in the future.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While out one morning in the park, a jogger found a brand new tennis ball, and seeing none around it might belong to, he slipped it into the pocket of his shorts. Later, on his way home, he stopped at the pedestrian crossing, waiting for the lights to change. A girl standing next to him eyed the large bulge in his shorts. "What''s that ?" she asked, her eyes gleaming with lust. "Tennis ball," came the breathless reply. "Oh," said the girl sympathetically, "that must be painful.... I had tennis elbow once."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Blow out a huge depressed fart and blame it on the person next to you out loud. 2. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator. 3. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 4. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. 5. Meow occasionally. 6. Show other passengers a rash on your genitals and ask if it looks infected. 7. Leave a box between the doors. 8. Sell Girl Scout cookies. 9. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask ''is that your beeper?'' 10. Say ''I wonder what all these do'' and push the red buttons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. The Magical World Inside The Abandoned Refrigerator 2. Where to Find the Toys in the Oven 3. 101 Games to Play in the Road 4. Homemade Fireworks using a Bathtub, a Blowdryer, and a Fork 5. Your Nightmares are Real 6. Monsters Killed Grandpa 7. All Guns Squirt Water 8. How Fun it is to Tie a Squirrel to a Kite 9. If it''s Storming out, the Best Place to Take Shelter is under a Tree 10. Dad''s New Wife Robert', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges? What happens if you get scared halfway to death twice? If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2? If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? If you write a book about failure, and it doesn''t sell, is it a success? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry? If Superman is so smart, why does he wear underpants over his trousers? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Why is it that if someone tells you there are 1 billion stars in the universe, you will believe them, but if someone tells you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was early morning at the military base, and the first sergeant was calling out names for the daily work parties listed on a piece of paper: "Ames" "Here!" "Jenson" "Here!" "Jones" "Here!" "Magersky" "Here!" "Seeback" No answer. "Seeback!" No answer was heard again. "SEEBACK!!!" The troops remained totally silent. At that point, someone whispered into the first sergeant''s ear. He looked again at what the last name really said, quickly turned over the list and continued calling the names printed on the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fellow in a bar noticed a woman, always alone, come in on a fairly regular basis. After the second week, he made his move. "No, thank you." she said politely. "This may sound rather odd in this day and age, but I''m keeping myself pure until I meet the man I love." "That must be rather difficult," the man replied. "Oh, I don''t mind too much," she said, "but it has my husband pretty upset."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl named Melissa was having a birthday party with her friends. One of her friends gives her this most annoying, screaming and loud singing bird as a funny gift. Melissa''s dad says "We are not keeping that bird, you know that, right?" Melissa says, "Please, it''s so cute. I''ll put it in my room." The dad says that he will think about it. That night, Melissa asks her dad if it is OK to keep the singing bird. Her dad says "I''m still not sure. I''ll have to sleep on it." Melissa says "No. Don''t break it. Besides, won''t it be more comfy if you slept in your bed?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: "Miss, may I kiss you?" Girl: "No." Boy: "Could you let me embrace your waist with my arms?" Girl: "No." Boy: "Well, then, may I touch your hands?" Girl: "No." Boy: "Why do you keep saying ''No'' all the time?" Girl: "Mom said, when date with a boyfriend for the first time, remember to say No to everything." Boy: "Oh, really? Your mom is so..., OK. Miss, do you mind I touch your hands?" Girl: "No." Boy: "Miss, do you mind if I embrace your waist with my arms? " Girl: "No." Boy: "Miss, do you mind I kiss you?" Girl: "Er... No."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little 6 year old Nancy and her big sister, Sandy were at the mall, looking at a sweatshirt. "That shirt is 60 dollars," said Sandy. "I wish I could afford it." Then the shopkeeper comes up, and says, "Can I help you girls with something?" "Well, this sweater is 60 dollars and we only have 43 dollars," said Nancy. "Well, sorry, but you are a little short," said the shopkeeper. "I can''t help it, I''m only 6," Nancy replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she has to use the highway as a slip and slide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did they ban the wave at the local football games? *Too many blondes were drowning. Why was the blonde on the roof of the bar? *Someone told her that the drinks were on the house. Why don''t blondes eat M&Ms? *They are too hard to peel. Why do blondes take the pill? *It''s the only way that they can keep track of what day of the week it is. Did you hear about the blonde that robbed a bank? *She tied up the safe and blew the guard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a shower, the man grabbed his shirt that his wife hung on the back of the door. It fell into the trash can. After picking it up, he looked into the trash and saw nothing so he put the shirt on. He went to college and walking along the corridor, he heard stiff laughs from everyone. After stopping in an open area, he looked around and saw nothing funny. When he started walking again, when PLOP, something behind him dropped to the floor. It was his wife''s bloody pad! Apparently it had been in the trashcan when the shirt fell in and stuck to the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What crackers do firemen like in their soup? Firecrackers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cecil and Scott are two homosexuals living together. It was extremely hot one day and Cecil arrived home to find Scott with his ass in the freezer. "Scott! What are you doing with your ass in the freezer?" Scott replied, "It was so hot outside, I thought you''d like something cool to slip into!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so short, she had 2 cuff her panties.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, she jumped on the arch and made it into the MacDonald''s M.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama''s so fat, she waz about 2 jump in the ocean, and the ocean jumped out and said u 1st.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you go into the bathroom you''re Russian; when you are in the bathroom, European; when you come out of the bathroom, you''re Finnish. You have to read the nationalities slowly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a duck and a spider? A duck has a web in its feet, a spider has its feet in a web!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a praying mantis with a termite? A bug that says grace before eating your house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday school teacher of pre-schoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that he grew up, etc. So he asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?" Steven raised his hand and said, "He''s in heaven!" Mary was called on and answered, "He''s in my heart!" Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know! I know! He''s in our bathroom!" The whole class went very quiet, looked at the teacher, and waited for a response. The teacher was completely at a loss for a few seconds. He finally gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how he knew this. Little Johnny replied, "Well, every morning my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells: ''Jesus Christ, are you still in there?''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny and his mother were having a parent-teacher conference. MOTHER: Johnny really enjoys having you as a teacher, Mrs. Bengal. JOHNNY: Really? I didn''t know it was opposite day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. If you had a $25 bill, what would you do with it? 2. How many tomatoes grow on a tree? 3. How many animals did Moses take on the ark?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in front of a door? Matt What do you call a guy with no arms or legs swimming? Bob What do you call a guy with no arms or legs water skiing? Skip', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(These are fake books, but they make me laugh) "Spots on the Wall" by Hoo-flung-poo "Under the Bleachers" by Seamore Butts "Ten Steps from the Outhouse" by Willie Makeit, Illustrations by Bettie Cant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are all the numbers scared of 7? Because 7 ate 9!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Whos there? Deaf person. Deaf person who? Sorry, can''t hear you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher in New York City wanted to see how many animals the city kids in her fourth-grade class could identify. She drew a picture of a cow on the blackboard and said, "Who can tell me what this is?" A little girl raised her hand. "Yes, Janie, what do you think it is?" "It''s a cow, teacher." "Very good, Janie," said the teacher. Then she drew a picture of a pig, and a little boy answered correctly. She drew several other barnyard animals and was unable to stump the class. Finally, she decided to try something a little more difficult. She drew a stag with a large spread of antlers. The kids just stared, but nobody offered an answer. "I''ll give you a hint," said the teacher. "What does your mommy call your daddy when she''s trying to be ''lovey-dovey''?" Instantly, little Johnny raised his hand and said, "I know, teacher. It''s a big horny bastard!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman is in bed with her lover who happens to be her husband''s best friend. They make love for hours, and afterwards, while they''re just laying there, the phone rings. Since it is the woman''s house, she picks up the receiver. Her lover looks at her and listens, only hearing her side of the conversation ... (She is speaking in a cheery voice) "Hello? Oh, hi. I''m so glad that you called. Really? That''s wonderful. I am so happy for you. That sounds terrific. Great! Thanks. Okay. Bye." She hangs up the telephone, and her lover asks, "Who was that?" "Oh," she replies," that was my husband telling me all about the wonderful time he''s having with you on his fishing trip."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so dumb when she went through the McDonalds drive through, she drove through McDonalds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde laughs at a joke 3 times. When the joke is told, When the joke is explained, And 5 days later, when she gets it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know this might be a little on the stupid side but I think it''s funny... Happy Birthday to you.. You live in a zoo.. You smell like a monkey.. And you look like one too..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends, a blonde and a redhead, are walking down the street and pass a flower shop where the redhead saw her boyfriend buying flowers. Redhead sighed and said, "Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again." The blonde looked quizzically at her and said, "You don''t like getting flowers from your boyfriend?" The redhead said, "I love getting flowers, but he always has expectations after giving me flowers, and I just don''t feel like spending the next three days on my back with my legs in the air." The blonde says, "Don''t you have a vase?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s this drunk standing out on the street corner, and a cop passes by, and says, "What do you think you''re doing?" The drunk says, "I heard the world goes around every 24 hours, and I''m waiting on my house. Won''t be long now, there goes my neighbor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Have you heard about the new ''Mint flavored birth control pill for women that they take immediately before sex? A. They''re called Predicaments', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If someone says, "A penny for your thoughts,", and you give them your two cents worth, what happens to the other penny?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred had just came back from a hiking trip, when his friend, George, asked how it was. "It was great!" said Fred, except on my way home I accidentally awoke a lion....it started chasing me....at one time he was so close, that I could feel his breath on my neck, but then he slipped!! He caught up again, and I could smell his foul breath right behind me, but he slipped again! Then he was so close, his paw reached out, inches away from my shoulders. Yet he slipped, for the third time! That is when I spotted a car and got a ride back here!" "Wow!", says George, "If that happened to me I would Have wet my pants!!" Fred looks at him and says "What do you think the lion kept slipping on?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s breath is so stank the thermometer read, "I Quit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, she wears a microwave as a beeper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. what is more diffucult than getting a pregnant elephant in your car? A. getting an elephant pregnant in your car', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why are families like chocolate? A. They are mostly sweet, with a few nuts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad: Courtney, do you want penne pasta for dinner? Courtney: No, but I''ll have dime or quarter pasta.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma so fat, when she sat down, she sat next to Everyone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s So Fat... When she crosses the border, they think she''s tryin to smuggle the whole country. When she was at the zoo the elephants were scared she might step on them. She''s what caused Mexico City to sink into the ground. She sunk Atlantis. She once found a whale hidden in her belly button. When a plane has to make an emergancy landing they use her as a runway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock ! Who''s there ? Bless ! Bless who ? I didn''t sneeze !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there ! Banana ! Banana who ? Banana split, so ice creamed !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) The couch is not mine. 2) No matter how much larger the human is, the cat still deserves half of the bed. 3) Tell those you love how much you love them but only after they feed you. 4) Its okay to be a tad overweight as long as you are still able to reach your goals(for example the windowsill). 5) Catnip actualy has a rather nice scent. 6) The printer is a valid seat. 7) All scurmishes with others can be solved by looking innocent. 8) Its okay to lose some hair, and of course, 9) Its always nice to be with those you love,even if they do smell like dog!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mommas like a really popular website;over 10,000 hits a day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, brunette, and a redhead all get together once a week to talk about the problems they are having with their daughters, and get input from the other two moms. So, the brunette decided to open the meeting. "I found a pack of cigarettes on my daughter''s nightstand the other night. What am I going to do?" The moms told her to talk to her daughter and tell her it was wrong, and to never do it again. The redhead said that she had recently found a 12 pack of beer in her daughter''s closet. The moms told her to talk to her daughter, tell her it was wrong, and never to do it again. When it was the blonde mom''s turn she said: "I found a box of condoms on my daughter''s dresser the other day." All the moms are in shock. But the blonde gets up and says, "No no, the worst part is that I didn''t even know she had one of those."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Think of the beat of the song walking in a winter wonderland while you are reading this... Lacy things -- the wife is missin'', Didn''t ask -- her permission, I''m wearin'' her clothes, Her silk pantyhose, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear. In the store -- there''s a teddy, Little straps -- like spaghetti, It holds me so tight, Like handcuffs at night, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear. In the office there''s a guy named Melvin, He pretends that I am Murphy Brown. He''ll say, "Are you ready?" I''ll say,"Whoa, Man!" "Let''s wait until our wives are out of town!" Later on, if you wanna, We can dress -- like Madonna, Put on some eyeshade, And join the parade, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear! Lacy things... missin'', Didn''t ask... permission, Wearin'' her clothes, Her silk pantyhose, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear. Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunken guy is walking down the street. He sees this nun, runs up and knocks her over. He says, "You don''t feel so tough now, do you,Batman!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has 40 teeth and holds back a monster? My zipper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many academics does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None. That is what their students are for.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men at a bar had been enjoying a few drinks for the past couple of hours and were pretty drunk when one of them notices a beautiful woman sitting in the corner. One says to the other, "Geez, I''d really like to dance with that girl." The other man replies, "Well go ahead and ask her, don''t be a chicken s***." So the man approaches the lovely woman and says, "Excuse me, would you be so kind as to dance with me?" Seeing the man is totally drunk the woman says, "I''m sorry, right now I''m contemplating on matrimony, and I''d rather sit than dance." So the man humbly returns to his friend. "So what did she say?" asks the friend. The drunk responded, "She said she''s constipated on macaroni, and would rather s*** in her pants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks out of a bar and sees a bum panhandling on the corner. The bum says, "Mister, can you spare a dollar?" The man thinks about the question for a bit and asks the bum, "If I give you a dollar, are you going to use it to buy liquor?" "No", says the bum. The man then asks the bum, "If I give you a dollar are you going to use it to gamble?" "No", says the bum. So the man says to the bum, "Do you mind coming home with me so I can show my wife what happens to someone who doesn''t drink or gamble?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do me and a mirror have in common? A. When we see your face we both crack up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the rooster cross the road? A: He heard the chicken was a slut. Q: Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? A: They already have boyfriends. Q: Why is it that an archaeologist is the best man to have as a husband? A: The older you get the more he is interested in you. Q: What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A: A widow! Q: Why are blond jokes so short? A: So men can remember them. Man: I don''t know why you wear a bra. You''ve got nothing to put in it. Woman: You wear a pants, don''t you? Man: God, why did you make my girlfriend so beautiful and caring?" God: So you would love her. Man: But God, why did you make her so stupid?" God: So she would love you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb you stole free samples.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a lawyer and a wood tick? A wood tick falls off when you die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Haven''t I seen you on TV? Well yes I do appear off and on, how do you like me? Off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, she can sell shade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama is so fat, a giant mistook her for a bowling ball!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One bright day in the middle of the night, 2 dead boys got up to fight back to back they faced each other, drew their knives, and shot each other. a deaf policeman heard the noise, and came to kill those two dead boys. if you don''t believe my stories true, ask the blind guy, he saw it to!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: "Do you think I''ll lose my looks when I get older?" Friend: "With luck, yes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people? A. All my autopsies have been performed on dead people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince. Yo mamma so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper. Yo mamma so old she ran track with dinosaurs. Yo mamma so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals. Yo mamma so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A job seeker was interviewing, and the interviewer asked him, "Tell me what is your greatest strength?" The prospective employee said, "Sir, I am a little bit shy, but should I give you my honest answer?" The interviewer says, "Of course, yes. I expect nothing but honesty from my staff." The job seeker says, "Sir, my greatest strength is my wife." The interviewer was quite impressed with the spousal respect of this man, thought he could be a great member of his team, corporate community and he deserved the job. So with an intention of offering him the job soon the interviewer tried to wrap up with the last question, "Tell me now, what is your greatest weakness?" The guy felt encouraged, and went on, "Sir, my greatest weakness is someone else''s wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There have been recent terrorist activities in France. Today the had to upgrade their security system from "Run" to "Hide". If things get any worse they''ll have to go to "Surrender", and then "Beg for Mercy".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she uses a dump truck as a toilet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mom is like a shotgun, one cock and shes ready to blow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you spot a happy motorcyclist? By the bugs in his teeth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My karma ran over your dogma. Cover me. I''m changing lanes. I''m in no hurry, I''m on my way to work. Hey idiot, hang up! You are driving a car, not a phone booth. Take your time, but hurry. Speed kills, drive slow, get a Honda. 0 to 60... in 15 minutes. If you don''t like my driving, stay off the footpath. Why am I the only person on earth that knows how to drive? Forget about world peace... visualize using your turn signal. As a matter of fact, I DO own the road. Evacuate the road!!! STUDENT driving!! Go on speeding, we''ll cut you out (of your car ) -- Your Fire Dept. Caution: Driver Sleeping. Don''t Think and Drive. Caution I swerve and hit people at random. So many pedestrians, so little time. Faster than a speeding ticket. Caution: I drive like you do The driver has no money, he''s married. Stop reading my bumper stickers and pay attention to the road! :D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A schoolteacher wanted to show her students how dangerous drinking alcohol could be. She brought a jar of alcohol and an earthworm to class one day to demonstrate its effects. She dropped the worm into the alcohol and it died instantly. She then asked her students what this proved. One student raised his hand and said, "If you drink a lot of alcohol, you won''t get worms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the Irish Potato famine, a young Irish-Catholic woman was worried about the poverty of her family. She told her parents that she was going to America to seek her fortune. With many tears, they let her go. Years passed, and the woman returned home. She arrived in a private jet, dressed in a gorgeous designer gown, with dazzling, expensive jewelry. Her family was stunned by their daughter''s wealth, and a more than a little curious at how she had come by it. The daughter finally confessed. "I hate to tell you this, but the reason I became so rich was because I became a prostitute." Her father immediately collapsed in shock. The doctor was called, and he began to help the man. As the daughter wept at her father''s bedside, she sobbed, "I didn''t realize he would be so disappointed to hear I became a prostitute!" The father sat bolt upright. "Prostitute?!" he exclaimed. "I thought you said ''Protestant''!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honk if you hate noise pollution!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb she got hit by a parked car!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your ex-lover wants you back and you want him to know your serious, here''s something you could say: "Come on back and take yo space, ''cuz if you break my heart again, I''ll break yo face".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the end of a T.V. show, why do they say "filmed in front of a live audience?" Well, it wouldn''t be a dead audience, would it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Chickens have no breast? Cause the Rooster has no hands!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Storming into his lawyer''s office, a Texas oil magnate demanded that divorce proceedings begin at once against his young bride. "What''s the problem?" "I want to hit that adulterin'' bitch for breach of contract," snapped the oil man. "I don''t know if that will fly," said the lawyer. "I mean your wife isn''t a piece of property; you don''t own her!" "Damn right," the tycoon rejoined, "but I sure as hell expect exclusive drillin'' rights!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The kindergarten teacher is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely" to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. When called upon the first student says, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher said, "Well, that isn''t entirely correct, because sometimes it''s gray and cloudy." Another student says, "Grass is definitely green." Teacher again replies, "If grass doesn''t get enough water it turns brown, so that isn''t really correct." Another student raises his hand and asks the teacher, "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher replied, "No, and that is not a suitable question for class discussion." The student replies, "Then I definitely pooped in my pants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid called up his mom from his college and asked her for some money, because he ran out of it. Mom said, ''Sure, sweetie. I''ll send you some money. You also left your calculus book here when you visited 2 weeks ago. Do you want me to send that up too?'' ''Uh, oh yeah, OK,'' responded the kid. So Mom wrapped the book along with the checks up in a package, kissed Dad goodbye, and went to the post office to mail the money and the book. When she gets back, Dad asked, ''Well how much did you give the boy this time? Mom said, ''Oh, I wrote 2 checks, one for $20, and the other for $1000'' ''That''s $1020!!!'' yelled Dad, ''Are you crazy???'' ''Don''t worry hon,'' Mom said, as she kissed Dad on the on top of his bald head, ''I taped the $20 check to the cover of his book, but I put the $1000 one somewhere between the pages in Chapter 19!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The young blonde bride made her first appointment with a gynecologist and told him that she and her husband wished to start a family. "We''ve been trying for months now, doctor, and I don''t seem to be able to get pregnant," she confessed miserably. "I''m sure well solve your problem," the doctor reassured her. "If you''ll just take off your clothes and get up on the examining table." "Well, all right, doctor," agreed the young woman, blushing, "but I''d rather have my husband''s baby."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blond and a redhead were talking on the phone. Blonde:My doctor told me I have to lose about ten pounds. Redhead:Oh really? Do you know what you going to do? Blonde: No not at all... hey you lost wieght recently. How did you do it? Redhead: I used the special K diet blonde:Whats that? Redhead:Well you eat a bowl of special K for lunch and one for breakfast and have a sensable dinner each day. I lost 5 pounds in a week Blonde: Okay thanks! a week later the blonde calls back her friend Redhead: How did it work? blonde:Not well at all i gained 5 pounds redhead: Really did you follow my intructions exactly? blonde: Well no but i had to lose double the wieght Redhead: Well what did you do? blonde: Well i figured that if 1 bowl for both breakfast and lunch was good for 5 pounds then two bowls for both breakfast and lunch would be good for ten.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A jealous husband hired a private detective to check on the movements of his wife. The husband wanted more than a written report; he wanted video of his wife''s activities. A week later, the detective returned with a video. They sat down together to watch it. Although the quality was less than professional, the man saw his wife meeting another man! He saw the two of them laughing in the park. He saw them enjoying themselves at an outdoor cafe. He saw them dancing in a dimly lit nightclub. He saw the man and his wife participate in a dozen activities with utter glee. "I just can''t believe this," the distraught husband said. The detective said, "What''s not to believe? It''s right up there on the screen!" The husband replied, "I can''t believe that my wife could be so much fun!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sat in his attorney''s office. "Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer asked. "Give me the bad news first." "Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars." "That''s the bad news?" asked the man, incredulously. "I can''t wait to hear the terrible news." "The terrible news is that it''s of you and your secretary."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New York man was forced to take a day off from work to appear for a minor traffic summons. He grew increasingly restless as he waited hour after endless hour for his case to be heard. When his name was called late in the afternoon, he stood before the judge, only to hear that court would be adjourned for the day, and he would have to return the next day. "What for?" he snapped at the judge. His honor, equally irked by a tedious day and sharp query roared, "Twenty dollars contempt of court. That''s why!" Then, noticing the man checking his wallet, the judge relented. "That''s all right. You don''t have to pay now." The young man replied, "I''m just seeing if I have enough for two more words."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once knew a boy who was dating his left hand and having an affair with his right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde goes on vacation to New York and wants to take a tour. She goes to ask about the tours and says, "So, where can I catch the bus for the walking tour?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Abby: My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and when I confront him, he denies everything. What''s worse, everyone knows he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Since he lost his job five years ago, he hasn''t even looked for a new one. All he does is buy cigars and cruise around and bullshit with his pals, while I have to work to pay the bills. Since our daughter went away to college he doesn''t even pretend to like me and hints that I am a lesbian. What should I do? Signed, Clueless Dear Clueless: Grow up and dump him. For Pete''s sake, you don''t need him any more. You''re a United States Senator from New York. Act like it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde boards a flight going to New York and sits in first class. A flight attendant asks to see her ticket. It''s a coach ticket. The flight attendant politely asks her to move. "I can do what eva I want! I''m a blonde." says the blonde. The flight attendant tells one of the other flight attendants that the blonde won''t move. The second flight attendant walks up to the blonde and says something to her and the blonde goes to coach. "What did you say to her?" asks the first flight attendant. "I told her that first class wasnt going to New York, only coach is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new man is brought into Prison Cell 102. Already there is a long-time resident who looks 100 years old. The new man looks at the old-timer inquiringly. The old-timer says, "Look at me. I''m old and worn out. You''d never believe that I used to live the life of Riley. I wintered on the Riviera, had a boat, four fine cars, the most beautiful women, and I ate in all the best restaurants of France." The new man asked, "What happened?" "One day Riley reported his credit cards missing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is eating out at a very fancy restaurant with her family. Right then she sees an ice carving of a dolphin by the wall. She says to the waiter, "I love that ice carving, but what do you do with it when it melts?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: "I am placed in the door with my seeing eye dog and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release ring for me and out I go with the dog." "But how do you know when you are going to land?" he was asked. "I have a very keen sense of smell, and I can smell the trees and grass when I am 300 feet from the ground" he answered. "But how do you know when to lift your legs for the final arrival on the ground?" he was again asked. He answered: "Oh, the dog''s leash goes slack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was telling her priest a Polack joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don''t you know I''m Polish?" "Oh, I''m sorry," the blonde apologizes, "do you want me to start over and talk slower?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wonder if you are a redneck....Well, if you have been married four times and still have the same in-laws you must be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sunday''s sermon was -- Forgive Your Enemies. Toward the end of the service, the Minister asked, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?" 80 percent of the congregation held up their hands. The Minister then repeated his question. All responded this time except one small elderly lady. "Mrs. Jones, are you not willing to forgive your enemies?" the minister asked. "I don''t have any." She replied. smiling sweetly. "Mrs. Jones, That is very unusual. How old are you?" "Ninety-Eight." She replied. "Oh, Mrs. Jones. Would you please come down in front and tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years and not have an enemy in the world." The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said, "I outlived the bitches."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The tourist had lost his way on a back road and stopped at the farmhouse to ask if he could be put up for the night. "Well, we''re a mighty crowded, since there''s already someone in the spare room" replied the farmer. "But I guess you can stay if you don''t mind sharing the bed with a red haired schoolteacher." "Look," said the tourist, "I want you to know I''m a gentleman." "Well," mused the farmer, "as far as I can tell, so is the red haired schoolteacher."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some race horses are staying in a stable. One of them starts to boast about his track record. "In the last 15 races, I''ve won 8 of them!" Another horse breaks in, "Well, in the last 27 races, I''ve won 19!" "Oh, that''s good, but in the last 36 races, I''ve won 28!" says another, flicking his tail. At this point, they notice that a greyhound has been sitting there, listening. "I don''t mean to boast," says the greyhound, "but in my last 90 races, I''ve won 88 of them!" The horses are clearly amazed. "Wow!" says one, after a hushed silence. "A talking dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top Ten Reasons to Procrastinate 1.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many colorguard girls does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Five, one to call the colorguard forward and four to take it down with a ceremony.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys enter a disabled swimming contest. The first has no arms. The second no legs and the third has no body, just a head. They all line up, the whistle blows and "splash" they''re all in the pool The guy with no arms takes the lead instantly but the guy with no legs is closing fast. The head of course sank straight to the bottom. Ten lengths later and the guy with no legs finishes first. He can still see bubbles coming from the bottom of the pool, so he decides he had better dive down to rescue him. He picks up the head, swims back up to the surface and places the head at the side of the pool, where upon the head starts coughing and sputtering. Eventually the head catches his breath and shouts: "Three years I''ve spent learning to swim with my !@#$% ears, then two minutes before the whistle, some idiot puts a swimming cap on me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do PSP''s and Michael Jackson have in common? The both get turned on by little boys!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat she''s scared to look at low fat food!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did u here Michael Jackson is sick? He had a 10 year old penis!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the cemetary so crowded? Everyone was dying to get in!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid said "I have a dirty joke; a kid fell in the mud". Another kid said, "I know a dirty joke; two kids fell into a pile of mud". Then the other kid said, "Well, I bet I have the dirtest joke of all; 2 pigs fell into a pile of mud and 3 came out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman hurries home, screeches her car into the driveway, runs into the house, slams the door and shouts at the top of her lungs, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!" The husband says, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?" "Doesn''t matter," she says. "Just get the hell out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joke: Why does Snoop Dogg Carry an umbrella? Answer: For Drizzle my nizzle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat the other day she was late to work and her stomach was an hour early.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t follow in my footsteps, I walk into walls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are dumb blonde jokes so short? A: So brunettes can remember them. Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? A: You pick it up pull the pin & throw it back. Q: What happened to the blonde tap dancer? A: She slipped off and fell down the drain. Q: How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer? A: The joystick is wet. Q: What''s the quickest way to get into a blondes pants? A: Pick them up off the floor. Q: Why don''t blonds play frisbee? A: It hurts their teeth. Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted! Q: How do blonde braincells die ? A: Alone. Q: Why don''t blondes eat bananas? A: They can''t find the zipper. Q: How did the blonde try to kill the fish? A: She tried to drown it. Q: What''s the difference between a blonde and a 747? A: Not everyone has been in a 747.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Yoo who? No thanks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While at work this man heard a very funny knock-knock joke. He told himself, "Although my wife is blonde I''m sure she will get this one!" Upon arriving home that night he proceeded to tell his wife about this joke he had heard. "Knock-knock," he said. She said, "Hold on honey, let me answer the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s stinks so bad, she puts on Secret and it told on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends went to the mall to go shopping; one was a brunette and the other was blonde. As they were shopping, the blonde suddenly said: "That girl could pass as my twin." The brunette starts laughing. The blonde says: "What is so funny?" The brunette says, "That was a mirror."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if when someone says: "Do you have any duct tape?" And you say: "I don''t have any ducks on tapes but I''ve got some on my wall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little johnny was heard praying in a loud voice a week before his birthday. "Dear God I pray that I will get a computer game for my birthday!" "Why are you shouting" asked his mother "God isn''t deaf?!?!?!?!?" "I know said Johnny, but grandma is!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama is so fat people run around her for exercize', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you tell if this lady is blonde? After placing an order in the drive-thru, the lady came on the speaker and asked: "Is that for here, or to go?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, when she was laying on the beach, everyone was screaming, saying "Look it''s Free Willy!!!!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when someone wants to shake her hand she has to give directions!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breasts in the mirror. He asks, "What are you doing?" She replies, "I went to the doctor today, and he told me I have the breasts of a 25 year old." The husband retorts, "Well, what did he say about your 50 year old ass?" She replied, "Frankly dear, your name never came up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette doing laundry asked her blonde friend to help her find a match for her sock. The blonde replied, ''''What for? Are you going to set it on fire?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mathematician, an accountant and an economist apply for the same job. The interviewer calls in the mathematician and asks "What do two plus two equal?" The mathematician replies "Four." The interviewer asks "Four, exactly?" The mathematician looks at the interviewer incredulously and says, "Yes, four, exactly." Then the interviewer calls in the accountant and asks the same question "What do two plus two equal?" The accountant says, "On average, four - give or take ten percent, but on average, four." Then the interviewer calls in the economist and poses the same question "What do two plus two equal?" The economist gets up, locks the door, closes the shade, sits down next to the interviewer and says "What do you want it to equal?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills off brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, constantly making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Day 751: My captors continue to torment me with bizarre dangling objects. They eat lavish meals in my presence while I am forced to subsist on dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of eventual escape -- that, and the satisfaction I get from occasionally ruining some piece of their furniture. I fear I may be going insane. Yesterday, I ate a houseplant. Tomorrow I may eat another.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do blonde brain cells die? Unused...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many stupid blondes does it take to make a circuit? Two - one to stand inside the bath, the other to pass the hair dryer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a blonde and a computer? A: You only have to punch information into a computer once.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch a cold? A: No need for them to worry about blowing their brains out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve often wanted to drown my troubles, but i can''t get my wife to go swimming!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so nasty I was on the phone with her, and she gave me an ear infection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s breath is so stank, that they consider it a weapon of mass destruction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Few women admit their age, Few men act theirs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never test the depth of water with both feet. Don''t take candy from strangers, unless they offer you a ride. I''ll start exercising as soon as i get into shape. If you have something to say, raise your hand and put it over your mouth. Maybe you should go to e-bay and buy a clue. Earth is full. go home. Gee, I''d like to care, but I wasn''t given that gene. Mirrors don''t lie, and lucky for you, they can''t laugh either. (i like this one) If you can''t laugh at yourself, at least let me do it. I don''t know what makes you so dumb, but it really works. Men are from Mars, Women are from Visa. (ok that was kind''a dumb) I used to have super powers but my therapist took them away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when someone farts in a gay bar? A love call.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do lesbians handle their liquor? A. By the ears. (Lick her)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do tight pants and a cheap motel have in common? A. No ball room', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What did the pedophile say when he got out of jail? A. I feel like a kid again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. If they bring shrimp home on shrimp boats, fish home on fish boats, and clams home on clam boats, what do they bring crabs home on? A. The Captain''s dinghy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a hamburger shop and orders a regular meal. Later, the waitress brings him his meal. He takes a bite out of it, and notices there''s a small hair in the hamburger. He begins yelling frantically at the waitress, exclaiming, "Waitress! There''s a hair in my hamburger! I demand to see what''s going on!" So, the waitress takes him back to the kitchen where the cook is, and to the man''s demise, he sees the cook take the meat patty and flatten it under his arm pit. The distraught customer says, "That''s disgusting!" Then the waitress says, "You think that''s disgusting? You should see him make donuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was standing in a crowded lift of the hotel she was staying in. When a man got in and accidentally elbowed her in the breast. The man said, "I''m sorry! But if your heart is as soft as your tit, you''ll forgive me." so the woman replies, "If you dick is as hard as your elbow then I am staying in room 113."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A patient was waiting for some results from his doctor. When the doctor arrives he says, "I have some good news and some bad news which do you want first." The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You''ve got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You''ve also got Alzheimer''s Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that''s not so bad. At least I don''t have AIDS."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer and a MCSE (Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer) were out driving, when their car broke down, and they couldn''t get it started. The mechanical engineer suggested that it was a failure somewhere in the drive train, but after checking it out he found that the engine and transmission were fine. The electrical engineer thought it might be the ignition system; lifted the hood, checked for a spark, and found that everything was OK. The MCSE was driving, and suddenly gets out of the car, slams the door, opens the hood and looks inside, slams that, gets back into the car, opens and closes all the windows and looks at his passengers and says, "There, it should start right up now..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: How many asian people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Asian Man: Whats a lightbulb?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde goes to the store and gets a box of almonds. As she is allergic to nuts, she asks a clerk at the counter, "Does this contain nut ingredients?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond goes into a pizza shop for a snack. She orders, "May I have a veggie pizza slice with all the works?" The worker says, "That would be our combo pizza." The blond says, "No, thanks. I''ll stay with the veggie slice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob and Joe, a couple of personal injury lawyers, were discussing conditions in the legal profession. "How''s business?" asked Bob. "Absolutely rotten!" responded Joe. "How have you been doing?" "Even worse," Bob replied. "I just chased an ambulance twelve miles and found a LAWYER inside it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Acme Rope, Inc. - Knot your ordinary company. Acme Mine Shafts - Drop in any time Acme Lollipops - One lick and you''ll stick with us. Acme Light Company - We have lots of bright ideas. Acme Clown Make-up - Let us put a smile on your face. Acme Perfume Corp. - We love it when business stinks. Acme Air Conditioning - We show people how to chill out. Acme Toy Company - Our work is kids'' play. Acme Perfume Company - Our work is all dollars and scents. Acme Almond Company - We''re nuts! Acme Sheep Farm - Our mind is on ewe. Acme Calculators - We help you solve your problems. Acme Flower Bulbs - We root for you. Acme Psychologists - Visit us and you won''t go away mad! Acme Poultry Management - Let us count your chickens before they hatch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only concept they understand is "mine".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man stepped onto the overnight train and told the conductor, "I need you to wake me up in Philadelphia. I''m a deep sleeper and can be ornery when I get up, but no matter what, I want you to help me make that stop. Here''s $100 to make sure." The conductor agreed. The man fell asleep, and when he awoke he heard the announcement that the train was approaching New York. Furious, he collared the conductor. "I gave you $100 to make sure I got off in Philadelphia, you worthless fool!" "Wow," another passenger said to his traveling companion. "Is that guy ever mad!" "Yeah," his companion replied. "But not half as mad as that guy they forced off the train in Philadelphia."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As is known, there is a large leper colony in Hawaii. To help ease the pain the patients have while there, a hockey rink was built to provide them entertainment. Only problem was that only one game ever got played on the rink. Within two minutes of game time, there was a face off in the corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 8 men, One to get off the couch, One to find a lightbulb, One to find a ladder, One to screw it in, One to shock himself and shock everyone around, One to call a docter, One to find out that it wasn''t out, the switch was off, and finally, one to sit back in laugh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Overheard by a professor in the halls a few weeks after the semester starts- Male student to another male student- "Yeah, I signed up for a women''s studies course. It wasn''t what I expected it to be." "Really? Why is that?" "Well, it involves all this re', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the squirrel go to the acorn shop? He broke his nuts on something!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and some-one will hear you, but fart and you''re on your own!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The squirrel''s eyes widened as he tried to move but froze when he realized........ He''d buried the wrong nuts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, in the mental institute, a doctor visited one of his new patients. "How are you today?" he asked, when he saw his patient. "Oh. I''m fine thank you very much. How about you?" replied the patient. "Oh, I''m fine," answered the doctor, while thinking if he should let this patient go seeing as how he was polite and all. "So, did you sleep alright last night?" "Oh, heavens no. The mosquitoes were such a bother, I got so angry that I put up a mosquito net around the bed but I climbed under the bed. HA! They can bite whatever they want inside the net, but I''ll be safe and sound under the bed," answered the patient with an air of dignity. "Never mind."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this guy in the mental institute who was taking his medicine that the nurse gave him. The same nurse was walking past his room and saw him shaking very vigorously. Intrigued, the nurse asked,"Dear patient, why are you shaking? Are you cold?" Still shaking, the patient replied, "No, my dear nurse, the bottle of medicine you gave me said ''shake before drinking'' but I forgot to shake!" "Oh dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s gray, has four legs, and a trunk? A mouse on vacation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Think of a number. 2. Multiply it by 3. 3. Now add 5. 4. Take away the number you first thought of. 5. Now add 7. 6. Subtract 2. 7. Add back the number you first thought of. 8. Now, close your eyes. > > > > > > > > Dark, isn''t it? :-)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m trying computer dating, at least I''m not getting dumped... but I do get deleted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bloke and his wife went to a family planning clinic. "We''ve been married for ten years and we''ve got no kids", said the husband. "And the next-door neighbors say it''s because we''re stupid." "Nonsense," smiled the doctor. "It''s probably to do with your diet. Or it might be a question of timing. How many times a week do you do it?" "Do what?" asked the wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('if stealing kids is kidnapping,is stealing adults oldnapping?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does a Dog go when he loses his tail? Answer: A retailer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do snakes always lose in court? Answer: They don''t have a leg to stand on!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the gay midget? He came out of the cupboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it better to be killed by a shark than by a lawyer? Answer: The shark would be brief.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While trying to escape through Pakistan, Osama Bin Laden found a bottle on a beach and picked it up. Suddenly a female Genie arose from the bottle and with a smile said: "Master, may I grant you one wish?" "You ignorant, unworthy daughter-of-a-dog! Don''t you know who I am? I don''t need any common woman giving me anything", barked Bin Laden. The shocked genie said, "Please, I must grant you a wish or I will be returned to that bottle forever." Osama thought a moment, grumbling about the impertinence of the woman, and said, "Very well, I want to awaken with three white women in my bed in the morning; so just grant it and be off with you!" The annoyed genie said, "So be it!" and disappeared. The next morning Bin Laden woke up in bed with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding, and Hillary Clinton. His penis was gone, his knee was broken, and he had no health insurance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat that when she went to school she had to sit next to everybody. Yo Momma so fat, her belt size is Equator. Yo Momma so fat, this guy was having sex with her, then rolled over twice and was still on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gay couple (of guys) and a lesbian couple decide to leave from New York to Miami at the same time. The two couples are neighbors and they plan on driving the same route. so the question is who gets to Miami first? Why the lesbians of course! They go lickety split while the guys are still at home packin''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, 2 blondes walked into a tanning salon. One blonde said, "A tan for 2 please!" The cashier said, "Ok," filled out a form for them and asked, "are you two sisters?" They chuckled and replied, "No, we aren''t even Catholic."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know that your dog bit my mother-in-law yesterday? "Is that so? Well, I suppose you''ll sue me for damages?" "Not at all. What''ll you take for the dog?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Arab diplomat visiting the U.S. for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was unused to the salt in American foods (french fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies etc.) and was constantly sending his manservant Abdul to fetch him a glass of water. Time and again, Abdul would scamper off and return with a glass of water, but then came the time when he returned empty-handed. "Abdul, you son of an ugly camel, where is my water?" demanded the Grand Emir. "A thousand pardons, O Illustrious One," stammered the wretched Abdul. "White man sit on well.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women as Explained by Engineers Finally- an explanation of Woman that makes sense to a man! Element: Woman Discoverer: Adam Atomic Mass: Accepted as 55kg, but known to vary from 45kg, to 225 kg. Physical properties ___________________ Body surface normally covered with a film of powder and paint. Boils at absolutely nothing-freezes for no apparent reason. Found in various grades, ranging from virgin material, to common ore. Chemical properties ____________________ Reacts well to gold, platinum, and all precious stones. Explodes spontaneously without reason or warning. The most powerful money-reducing agent known to man. Common Use __________________ Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars. Can greatly aid relaxation. Can be a very effective cleaning agent. Hazards __________________ Turns green when placed alongside a superior specimen. Possession of more than one is possible, but specimens must never make eye contact!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, her nickname is "Damn." Yo mama''s so big, when she stands up the sun goes out. Yo mama''s so dirty, the US Government uses her bath water for chemical weapons Yo mama'' so hairy, when she goes to the circus the bearded lady protests against non-union workers. Yo mama''s so hairy, she shaves with a weedwacker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the beginning of term, we were supposed to portray what we learned during holidays by acting in a play for the school. Here I was known as the best actress in class so I was given the role of a secondary student who goes out with a rich man''s reckless son. During the rehearsals, everything went perfect until the real day on stage. Acting pregnant with clothes stuffed in my dress, I begged the rich man''s son not to leave me in such a condition when suddenly my BABY fell out of the TUMMY... I was so embarrassed as the whole school burst out laughing hysterically. But with talent, I knelt down n cried that silence fell upon their heads thinking it was part of the play... I was still voted the best.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A handsome gentleman gets in an accident and finds himself in hospital soon after recovering. Shocked, he asks the nurse how he got there and if he has all his body parts on. "You only lost your arms, sir, but you will be ok," was her reply. Very disappointed that he had lost part of his life, he decides to throw himself over the hospital on the last block but as he is about to do that, he notices someone on the street in the same situation, but he was dancing vigorously. He decides to find out how he keeps happy in such a situation. "Buddy, tell me what is your secret to happiness," he said. "You''ve got no idea what it takes to scatch myself. My chest is itchy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jason showed his buddy the beautiful diamond ring he had bought his girlfriend for her birthday. "I thought she wanted a four-wheel-drive vehicle," ventured his friend. "She did," Jason said. "But where am I going to find a fake Jeep?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Violets are blue, I copied your test and I flunked too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like to sleep, and stay in bed, all because you cracked a hammer on my head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that if you fart in church you have to sit in your own pew?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Spock find in the toilet? The captain''s log.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two peanuts who got mugged on their walk down the street? They were assaulted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vincent Van Gogh had a really large family. Here''s a listing of some of the lessor known ones... The grandfather who moved to Yugoslavia ........ U. Gogh The brother who bleached all his clothes white .. Hue Gogh The cousin who was a blues musician- Indi-Gogh The fruity brother- Man-Gogh The sister who wore a mini skirt to dance in bars ... Go Gogh The real obnoxious brother .......... Please Gogh The brother who ate prunes ............ Gotta Gogh The uncle who worked at a convenience store ....... Stop N Gogh His dizzy aunt ............. Verti Gogh The cousin that moved to Illinois ......... Chicah Gogh His magician uncle .............. Wherediddy Gogh The cousin who lived in Mexico .......... Amee Gogh Another cousin who lived in Mexico ......... Green Gogh Nephew that drove a stage coach .......... Wells Far Gogh Aunt who was a good dancer .............. Tan Gogh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a schizophrenic and so am I.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell a boy chromosome from a girl chromosome? Pull down their genes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For Stupid: Hey, your house is calling, and they''re missing their idiot. Where were you when God gave out brains? How many times have you crawled into the hole that said ''lowers your IQ''? Did you get dropped on your head when you were little and your mom said you were just ''special''? Did you like getting hit by the stupid stick? For Ugly: Did you perhaps get run over by a truck sometime in your life? Note: You can use stupid insults and change them to ugly insults by a word and vice versa.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the white girl go have sex with a Mexican? Because her teacher told her to do an ESE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ms. Suzy had a steam boat, the steam boat had a bell! The steam boat went to heaven, Ms. Suzy went to... Hello operator, please give me number nine! And if you disconnect me, I''ll chop off your... Behind the frigerator, there was a piece of glass! Ms. Suzy sat upon it, and broke her big fat... Ask me no more questions, tell me no more lies! The boys are in the bathroom, zipping up their... Flies are in the meadow, bees are in the park! Ms. Suzy''s with her boyfriend, kissing in the d-a-r-k, d-a-r-k dark, dark, dark!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor! I have a serious pronblem, I can never remember what I just said. "When did you first notice this problem?" "What problem?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a car skidded on wet pavement and struck a telephone pole, several bystanders ran over to help the driver. A woman was the first to reach the victim, but a man rushed in and pushed her aside. "Step aside lady," he barked. "I''ve taken a course in first-aid!" The woman watched for a few minutes, then tapped him on the shoulder. "Pardon me," she said. "But when you get to the part about calling a doctor, I''m right here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between man and Superman? Man wears underwear under the trousers and Superman wears it over the trousers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did Adam and Eve have belly buttons? What happens if you pop the popcorn upside down? Why aren''t HAMburgers made out of ham? And my favorite: Donde estan mis pantalones?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only a redneck visits a trailer park to look for home decorating ideas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, 15 year old Christy came home from shopping with her Auntie Kim and Auntie Flo. Christy says to her 6 year old sister, "Auntie Kim has bad taste, but Auntie Flo has good taste." Her sister then says, "How do you know? Have you bitten them before?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why am I stronger than Tarzan? Because I can beat on my chest without screaming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a trip from California to Indiana, it didn''t help that my connecting flight from Denver was delayed twice because of mechanical problems. Then, after we were aloft, I noticed the lights began flickering. I mentioned this to a flight attendant. "I''ll take care of it," she said. Moments later the lights went out. Clearly she had solved the problem by turning off all the lights. A passenger across the aisle who had been watching me leaned over and said, "Whatever you do, please don''t ask about the engines."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The warden, addressing the three instigators of a failed prison riot, said, "I would like to know two things. First: Why did you revolt? Second: How did you get out of your cell?" One of the three men stepped forward, "Warden, we rebelled because the food is awful." "I see. And what did you use to break the bars?" the warden asked. Replied the spokesman, "French Toast..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mood of a woman An angel of truth and a dream of fiction, A woman is a bundle of contradiction, She''s afraid of a wasp, will scream at a mouse, But will tackle a stranger alone in the house. Sour as vinegar, sweet as a rose, She''ll kiss you one minute, then turn up her nose, She''ll win you in rage, enchant you in silk, She''ll be stronger than brandy, milder than milk, At times she''ll be vengeful, merry and sad, She''ll hate you like poison, and love you like mad. The moods of a man! Hungry! Horny! Sleepy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a stupid warning label: If you look at a fire extinguisher, it will say "Non-flamable"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you fall down a bottomless pit... do you eventually die of starvation?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t the glue inside the bottle dry?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Isn''t it fascinating how feet smell and noses run?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think about it, a muffin is just a bald cupcake!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As far as we Americans know, Osama Bin Laden could, quite possibly, be right here in New York, posing as a cab driver, and we''d never know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there''s no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can''t paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can''t paper do this to people? Why isn''t notebook paper constantly suffocating students while they take notes in class? I''ll tell you why: because paper can''t beat anybody; a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/paper/scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to beat me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, "Oh shit, I''m sorry. I thought paper would protect you, you asshole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you put a slinky on an escalator, would it go forever?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Hellen Keller''s mother punish her??? rearranging her furniture.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a redneck groom about to get married. As he puts on the beaver pelt suit, he is talking to his dad. "Hey Uncle Jim, I''m kind of worried. My fiance told me she''s still a virgin." "Why is that an issue?" the dad says. "Well, if she isn''t good enough for her family, why would she be good enough for ours?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that the goverment finds Native American chiefs more important than presidents? The new head on Mt. Rushmore is at least twice the size of the others. It''s the head of an Indian!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the sick pony say to its mother? I''m a little hoarse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes for her pelvic exam. While the doctor is doing the exam, he notices bikini tan lines, and she has sandals on that say "hecho en mexico" (made in mexico). So he casually asks her, "So did you enjoy your trip to Mexico?" She sits up a little and stares at him with this look of disbelief. "You can tell that just from a pelvic exam?!?!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nurse was giving a patient a check up and came to the task of taking his temperature. So the patient came in and she told him to take his pants and boxers off so he hesitantly did so. She then put somthing in his butt. She had some time, so she went to the bank and was going to withdraw some cash. As she went to get her pen to sign the reciept, she took out the rectal themometer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever heard of the kissing shield? No? then look at this list of crazy inventions people just like you made; Kissing shield Face bake Horse diaper Whopper wheels Skateboard pirate Light bulb changer Beach boots Remote controlled horse Flying bike Baby bottom art Pump power Dummy chicken farmer Airplane moisturizer Alarm fork All terrain stroller Aqua swing Baby cage Ball blinders Banana head BIRD CAT TRAP FEEDER Boob tube Boatless water skiing Hijacker detector And many more dumb inventions soon to come. Be watching!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Grizzly with no teeth? A gummy bear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dentist was getting ready to clean an elderly lady''s teeth. He noticed that she was a little nervous, so he began to tell her a story as he was putting on his surgical gloves. "Do you know how they make these rubber gloves?" She said, "No, I don''t have any idea." "Well," he spoofed, "Down in Mexico they have this big building set up with a large tank of latex, and the workers are all picked according to hand size. Each individual walks up to the tank, dips their hands in and then walks around for a bit while the latex sets and dries right onto their hands! Then they peel off the gloves and throw them into the big ''Finished Goods'' crate and start the process all over again." She didn''t laugh one bit. Five minutes later, during the procedure, he had to stop cleaning her teeth because she burst out laughing. The old woman blushed and exclaimed, "I just suddenly thought about how they must make condoms!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love my Job, I love the Pay! I love it more and more each day. I love my Boss, he''s the best! I love his boss and all the rest. I love my Office and its location - I hate to have to go on vacation. I love my furniture, drab and gray, and the paper that piles up every day! I love my chair in my padded cell! There''s nothing else I love so well. I love to work among my peers - I love their leers and jeers and sneers. I love my computer and all its software, I hug it often though it doesn''t care... I love each program and every file, I try to understand once in a while!! I''m happy to be here, I am I am, I''m happy to give lots of taxes to my Uncle Sam. I love this Work, I love these Chores. I love the meetings with deadly bores. I love my Job - I''ll say it again - I even love these friendly Men. The men who''ve come to visit today, In those lovely white coats to take me away!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most people don''t know that back in 1912 Hellman''s mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the "Titanic" was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after New York City. Mexicans were crazy about the stuff. The Mexican people were eagerly awaiting delivery and were disconsolate ("desperados") at the loss. So much so that they declared a national day of mourning which they still observe today. It is known, of course, as ...Sinko de Mayo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven. God comes and says "I want the men to make two lines. One line for the men that dominated their women on earth and the other line for the men that were whipped by their women. Also, I want all the women to go with St Peter." Said and done, the next time God looks the women are gone and there are two lines. The line of the men that were whipped was 100 miles long, on the line of men that dominated women there was only one man. God got mad and said, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created you in my image, and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons that stood up and made me proud, learn from him! Tell them, my son, how did you manage to be the only one on that line?" The man said, "I don''t know. My wife told me to stand here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred was getting out of his car to go to an electronics store and had his dog in the car with him. "Stay," said Fred. A blond was witnessing all this and said to Fred, "Would it just be easier to put it in park?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman at a party walked up to a man and told him, ''''If you were my husband I would poison your drink." The man replied, ''''If you were my wife I would drink it.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What do you call a Bass Clarinet player with half a brain? A: Gifted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a cop walks in to a barber shop and gets a haircut. He tries to pay the barber but the barber says, "Im doing free haircuts this week." The cop thanks him and walks away. The next day there is a box of a dozen donuts on the barber''s desk. A republican walks in and gets a haircut. He tries to pay the barber but the barber says, "Im doing free haircuts this week." The republican thanks him and walks away. The next day there is a self help book on his desk. A democrat walks in and gets a haircut. He tries to pay the barber but barber says, "I''m doing free haircuts this week." The next day, there are 20 democrats at the door waiting for a free haircut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so old she sat next to Jesus in the 3rd grade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do lawyers always wear a tie? To keep back the foreskin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blond make a square pie? Because Pi(r) squared!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how, in the olden days, you were named for what you did? For instance, if you were a blacksmith, your last name would be Smith, if you were a baker, your last name was Baker. It kind of makes me wonder what John Hancock''s ancestors did for a living.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mildred, the church gossip, and self-appointed monitor of the church''s morals, kept sticking her nose into other people''s business. Several members did not approve of her extra-curricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence. She made a mistake, however, when she accused George, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town''s only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told George and several others that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing. George, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn''t explain, defend, or deny. He said nothing. Later that evening, George quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred''s house............. and left it there all night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500 man elite fighting unit called the US Redneck Special Forces (USRSF). These North Carolina, South Carolina, Kentucky, West Virginia, Mississippi, Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, Texas and Tennessee boys will be dropped into Iraq and have been given the following facts about Terrorists: 1. The season opened today 2. There is no limit 3. They taste just like chicken 4. They don''t like beer, pickups, Harley Davidson''s, country music or Jesus 5. They are DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE for the death of Dale Earnhardt This mess in Iraq should be over IN A WEEK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Abbey! Abbey who? Abbey stung me on the nose!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Acid! Acid who? Acid down and be quiet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Acid! Acid who? Acidently on purpose!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Bach! Bach who? Bach to work!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pretty young blonde visiting her new doctor for the first time found herself alone in a small waiting room. She began undressing nervously, preparing herself for the upcoming examination. Just as she draped the last of her garments over the back of a chair, a light rap sounded on the door and a young doctor strode in. Coming to an abrupt halt, the doctor looked his nude patient up and down carefully and with considerable appreciation. "Miss Smith," he said finally, "it seems quite obvious to me that until today you have never undergone an eye examination."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was eating a fruit rollup once, you know, with the paper on the bottom...well the instructions were "Do not eat paper." Noooo! I thought the paper was part of the snack!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what happened to the lost boy? he came to a house and wrote a joke that was exactly like this except in larger font and with a little more umph ya know what i mean a very humerous joke in fact i do believe he is working on more ya know i lied i ain''t lost i just like making very very very long jokes sorta like this one ya know what i wrote is called a run on sentence my papa told me about run ons they are fun i can''t imagine not having a papa if you don''t have one i feel bad for you starting at ''starting'' i wrote 100 words thats a lot but still my favorite number is464,546,879,6 but i won''t go till there i can''t believe i counted my words how nerdy i''m stopping soon wait......... 127 ha buh bye', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s mother took her 6-year-old son with her to the bank. They were in line behind a rather obese lady. As the mother patiently waited, Little Johnny looked at the women in front of him and observed loudly, "Hey, Mom, she''s really fat." The lady looked at Johnny, made eye contact with his mother and gave an understanding smile. Little'' Johnny received a reprimand. After a minute or two, Little Johnny spread his hands as far as they will go and loudly said, "I bet her butt is ''that'' wide." At this the lady glared at Johnny. His embarrassed mother severely scolds her son. Again after a couple of minutes Little Johnny stated loudly, "Look how the fat hangs over her belt." The lady turned and told Johnny''s mother to control her child and his mother threatened him with severe bodily harm. The lady''s pager begins to go off. Lil'' Johnny yelled in a panic at the top of his voice, "Run for your life, she''s backing up"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politians are like constipated people-they''re full of shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pirate say when he got cold? Shiver me timbers!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a boy walked in the classroom. The teacher asked him why he was late; he said he was on top of Blueberry Hill. The next boy walked in and the teacher asked him why he was late; he said he was on top of Blueberry Hill. The last boy walked in and the teacher asked him why he was late. He said he was on top of Blueberry Hill. Then a girl walked in and the teacher said, "Let me guess, you''re late beacause you were on top of Blueberry Hill". Then the girl said, "I am Blueberry Hill".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 16-year-old girl bought herself a very tiny bikini. Very proud, she came home and put it on. She then showed her mother how she looked in it. "What do you think mom?" she asked. Her mother replied, "If I wore that when I was your age, you would be 5 years older."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brother and sister are in a terrible car accident and the brother is badly injured. At the hospital the doctor tells the sister, "His brain is dead, but his pulse is still beating." The sister replies, "Oh no! We''ve never had a Democrat in the family before!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give blood. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Go skateboarding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can only be kind to one person a day. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Today is not your day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I walk the dogs, I take a handful of black plastic bags, since the local council requires us to ''clear up after our dogs'' or face a stiff fine. This being the wild blackberry season, I use a spare (clean!) one to hold the blackberries I pick on the way. Coming off the hill, I passed an American visitor, who said something, looking at the bulging bag. "I''m taking them home for supper - they''re delicious with cream," I said. She turned white. Some minutes later I worked out that she had said that the dog-waste bin was just round the corner. If I see her again, I must invite her to supper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was at a department store for the first time and was very confused. The man beside her was getting irritated at the blonde because she kept asking him so many questions about the store. He said, "Please! Just stop asking me so many questions!" "Oh," the blonde replied. "Why?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid 1: You did it again! Kid 2: What? What did I do? Kid 1: You know, that thing. Kid 2: What thing? Kid 1: That thing when your lips move and sound comes out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have the right to remain silent. Exercise it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl, "Will you marry me?" The girl said, "NO!" The guy lived happily ever after and went fishing and hunting. He played golf a lot, drank beer, and farted whenever he wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you never play poker in the jungle? -because there are too many cheatahs!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Scottish nuns had just arrived to the US by boat when one said to the other, "I heard that the occupants of this country actually eat dogs." "Odd," her companion replied, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do." Nodding emphatically, the mother superior pointed to a hot dog vendor and they both walked towards it. "Two dogs, please," said one. The vendor was only too pleased to oblige and he wrapped both hot dogs in foil. Excited, the nuns hurried over to a bench and began to unwrap their ''dogs.'' The mother superior was first to open hers, then, stared at it for a moment, leaned over to the other nun and whispered cautiously, "What part did you get?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say this out loud: this is a cat is is a cat how is a cat to is a cat keep is a cat a is a cat dumbass is a cat busy is a cat for is a cat forty is a cat seconds is a cat * * * * * * * * * * * * * now read only the first word of each line!! THIS is a cat IS is a cat HOW is a cat TO is a cat KEEP is a cat A is a cat DUMBASS is a cat BUSY is a cat FOR is a cat FORTY is a cat SECONDS is a cat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman went in for a breast exam. The doctor said, "Have a seat. I have to numb your breasts first." The woman said, "Okay." So the doctor put his face between her breasts and said, "Numb, numb, numb, numb, numb."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you have cookie for lunch? ''Cuz your face is kinda krummy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Moses wandering through the desert for 40 years? Because blokes refuse to ask for directions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the medical term for a woman getting a sex change? An adadictomy (add-a-dick-to-me)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish couple were having a dinner party and the wife, Patty, was very concerned that this dinner go off with out a hitch. She sent the husband, Phillip, off to get some escargot (snails) for an appetizer. She said to him "Don''t stop at the local pub, I need you back here right away." So off he goes. After a while he doesn''t come back and Patty is getting more and more nervous. About 5 hours later, after the dinner had ended, Phillip, obviously drunk, was just getting into the driveway of the house when he slipped and the snails went flying everywhere. Patty came out of the house and said to him, "Where have you been this whole time?" Thinking quickly Phillip bent down, looked at the snails and replied, "Come on, little fellers, you''re almost home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat that she fell over and made the Grand Canyon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The secret to enjoying a good wine is: 1 - Open the bottle to allow it to breathe. 2 - When it does not breathe, give it mouth-to-mouth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mother decided that 7-year-old Cathy should get something ''practical'' for her birthday. "Suppose we open a savings account for you?" mother suggested. Cathy was delighted. "It''s your account, darling," mother said as they arrived at the bank, "so you fill out the application." Cathy was doing fine until she came to the space for ''Name of your former bank.'' After a slight hesitation, she put down ''Piggy.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I did your mom... ...a favor by making you... ...lunch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the Iraqi chicken cross the road? A: To take over the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam: "Cas, phone for you!" Cas: "Okay, thanks, Sam." --BEEP OF PHONE BEING TURNED ON-- "Hello? Oh, hi...." --AFTER PHONE CONVERSATION-- Sam: "So, who was it?" Cas: "Heather." Sam: "What did she want?" Cas: "Our phone number."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 9999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 Hints to arguing with blondes: 1.) Use small easy to understand words. 2.) Keep your sentences short and to the point. 3.) Use, what I like to call, "Blonde logic" aka logic that only makes sense to them or on occasion other blondes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('May your troubles be as few and far between as your great-grandmother''s teeth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the worst time to be a rat or a mouse? A: When it''s raining cats and dogs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, when she walks down the street and hums, the kids all run after her, waving money and yelling, "Ice Cream truck! Ice Cream truck!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know... in Louisiana it is illegal to tie an alligator to a fire hydrant and leave it unattended? Really! It''s true!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Frenchman and the Italian were in the woods, hunting together when suddenly a beautiful blonde girl raced across their path, totally nude! "Would I love to eat that?" "Oui, oui!" The Frenchman said, smacking his lips. So the Italian shot her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are questions the answers to I wish I knew: If one hermaphrodite dates another hermaphrodite, are they gay, straight or bisexual? Why does the cat always use the litter box right before I need to brush my teeth? Who is Murphy and what sad life did he lead to have that law named after him? Why do they keep making things smaller and smaller when all that does is make them easier to lose? Why are there so many 24%s in my joke recomender? And why oh why are there so many of these lists?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women''s breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. After a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took Dr. Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do we know that Christ was Irish? Because he was 33; still lived at home; thought his mother was a virgin, and she thought he was the son of God.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is obvious. The downfall of the world is here. It is 2005 and we have lived on this earth for ages. I suppose it is about time for the end. Proof? You want proof? I have all the proof you will need: They let Brittney Spears reproduce. Ohh that poor poor child!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman had been married for ten years and decided to try and have kids. They had not been using birth control for the entire time they had been married, so they thought they may have a problem conceiving. The woman, who was hard of hearing, decided to go to the gynecologist and see if the problem was with her. The doctor examined her and came in to give her the conclusions. He said, "I''m sorry, but the problem is with you. You have insufficient passion, and if you ever have a baby, it will be a miracle." The woman was very upset and went home crying. Her husband got home and asked her what was wrong. She said, "The doctor told me I''ve got a fish up my passage and if I ever have a baby it will be a mackerel."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One, men will screw anything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 50... 1 to hold the lightbulb, and 49 to drink ''till the room spins!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A male blue whale, can ejaculate 40 gallons of sperm during sex. Only 10% of that will get to the female. The other 36 gallons is left in the sea. No wonder the sea''s so salty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you catch an elephant? Dig a hole, put peanuts around it, fill it with ashes and when the elephant goes to eat the peanuts, kick him in the ash hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so old, she breast fed Methuselah.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Found in micellaneous things. If at first you don''t succeed, skydiving isn''t for you. I don''t have a short attention span, it''s just that I- Etc.:a sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do. My mind not only wanders; sometimes it leaves completely. If your dog is fat, you''re not getting enough exercise. Without geography, you''re nowhere. When someone tells you nothing is impossible, tell him to dribble a football. Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernail. Baseball is wrong; man with four balls cannot walk. Man who drives like hell, bound to get there. It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it. Crowded elevator smells different to midgets. Man who stands on toilet is high on pot. That will be all for now. Ciao', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a little Indian boy came up to an old man in the village (In the Indian heritage, the oldest are most wise). The little boy asks, "How do we Indians get their names? Like... Blackhawk, or Redeyes?" The old man says, "Well, actually, when they are born, the first thing we see is what we name them." "Oh! Okay, thanks!" says the little boy. "Any more questions, Two Dogs Fucking?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you want to know how to make a blonde''s eyes sparkle......Shine a flashlight in her ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you keep a blond from whistling while she is skydiving? A. Make sure she wears underwear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red Violets are blue God made me pretty What the heck happened to you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who''s not a creep. One who''s handsome, smart and strong, And doesn''t mind admitting when he''s wrong, One who thinks before he speaks, When he promises to call, he won''t wait two weeks. I pray that he is gainfully employed, And when I spend his cash he won''t be annoyed & opens my door & begs to do more Oh, send me a man who will make love to my mind, knows just what to say when I ask, "How Big is My Behind!?!" One who will kiss me till my body''s twitchin'', In the hall, the shower, the garden and the kitchen. I pray this man will love me no end, and never attempts to date my best friend. And, as I kneel and pray by my bed ... I look at the Butt Head you sent me instead! ~ Amen ~', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a boy said to his mom, "I''m a Picses, what are you?" The the mom answered, "Cancer." The boy then asked in a shocked state, "You killed Grandma?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed." "OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That''s terrible!" His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands. Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today in history class the topic was the Incas. Hoping to see if the students had done the reading, the teacher calls on random students and asks them questions. "Where could the Incas be found?" The teacher''s first question. "Jonie?" foolishly she called on the blonde. Not having actually done the homework, and only halfway hearing the question, she guesses: "In the pen?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was going to church on Sunday. His mom gave him $40 so that he could put $20 in the offering plate and use $20 to buy anything on the way. On his way to the church he lost the $40, so he went back to look for it. He found $20, then looked up and said, "God, here is mine. Go and look for yours!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady was at the bar when a guy started hitting on her. She said "I''ll send my pants to you from the dry cleaners, that way you can get into them on you own time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Flea: (noun) a small, wingless, bloodsucking parasite (see also) a. Brother-in-law b. lawyer c. politician', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock, Who''s there? Alarm. Alarm who? Alarm the cops about all the partying I''ve been having!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I-rish my beer was full...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men were riding on a train. One of them had a bottle in his coat pocket, and the other one wanted it. Finally the train went through a dark tunnel and the man was able to take the bottle out and drink up all the "whisky" inside of it. Then he put it back into the other man''s pocket. When the train came out of the tunnel, the man who owned the bottle took it out of his pocket, opened it up, and spit into it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you keep a jack ass in suspense? A. I`ll tell you tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a lighted dynamite stick, please hold it until I get back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Help reduce air pollution, stop breathing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Keep talking, someday you''ll say something intelligent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Keep talking, I always yawn when I''m interested.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mouth is so big you could swallow a whole banana... ...sideways', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone dropped $50. Who do you think will pick it up? A.) An honest politician B.) A five year old child C.) Santa Claus B.) A 5 year old child, all the others aren''t real.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A. Because it was dead Q Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because it was stapled to the dog! Q. Why did the tree fall over? A. Because it thought it was a game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Did you hear about the man who had a shower without getting his hair wet? He was bald! 2. Did you hear about the boy who was named after his father? His name was Dad!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) How does a blonde make a stainless ink pen? A.) She doesn''t put ink in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so stupid, when her softball coach said to keep her eye on the ball, she stared at the softball for 3 days straight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story told to me. A big city news anchor is driving along the freeway when his young son asks him, "Daddy, what does motherf____r mean?" He turns to his son, "That''s a really bad word, don''t ever say that again. Where did you learn that?!?!?" His son answers innocently, "Well, that''s what you just said about that car you said cut you off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two male flies are buzzing around, cruising for good looking female flies. One spots a real cutie sitting on a pile of horse manure and dives down toward her. "Pardon me," he says, turning on his best charm, "...but is this stool taken?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are filling up at a gas station. The first one says to the other, "I bet these awful gas prices are going even higher". The second replies, "It won''t affect me. I always buy exactly $10 worth".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pedro was driving down the street, in a panic, because he had an important meeting and couldn''t find a parking place. Looking up toward heaven, he said "Lord, take pity on me. If you find me a parking place, I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of my life and give up tequila." Miraculously, a parking place appeared. Pedro looked up again and said "Never mind. I found one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady gynecologist, was concerned that she was be being lied to everytime she took her car in to have it worked on. She knew very little about cars, so when she heard the local college was having classes in auto repair, she signed up. She studied very hard and was one of the best students. When the final exam came she took her time and did the best she could. She got the results backand she passed with a 150 percent out of 100 percent. When she got her grade she couldn''t figure it out, so she called her professor. The professor told her, "I gave you 50 percent for passing the written test, 50 percent for taking the engine apart and putting back together, and another 50 percent for doing it thru the muffler."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? life life who? A life is what you need to get!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s gross? Two vampires fighting over a bloody tampon. What''s grosser than that? Finding a used condom on the bottom of a mayonnaise jar. What''s grosser than that? When you open the refigerator and the rump rost farts in your face. You want to know what''s grosser than that? When you sit on your grandpa''s lap and he pops a boner. But the one thing that is grosser than that is when you are siting on your grandma''s lap and she pops a boner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand? Quattro Sinko.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) What do you ask a kid wearing a muscle shirt but has no muscles? A.) Did you leave your muscles in your other muscle shirt?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.)Your child poops in their pants- what do you do? A.)Drop off the child at day-care and make them change it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) What does a blond say when she comes out of a lesbian bar? A) Wow, those people sure were friendly!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife asked her husband well you remarry if I die? Husband:(caught off guard) He said no, I already did.... CRAP!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend Sam was taking electricity as one of his high school electives, originally being interested in robotics. Unfortunately, he changed his mind, but was still stuck with finishing his despised electricity books. "Do you have any idea of a direction you are going to go now?" asked my mother. He shook his head. "No idea..." That''s when my dad jumped in. "Well, even though you won''t use it in your career, now you will know what happens electrically when you push the little red button and say ''Welcome to Sheetz, Pump 5 is on.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond goes up to a brunette that''s wearing a puffy wig with two green ribbons on each front side. The blond says "NICE CAT! HOW DID YOU GET IT TO BALANCE ON YOUR HEAD?" The brunette tears up and says "ITS A WIG! MY FRIENDS TOLD ME IT WAS IN FASHION AND I GUESS THEY HATE ME!!!" The brunette runs home and never noticed that she was talking to a blond. So in the end the brunette was a blond too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so ugly she didn''t even have to dress up for Halloween, and still scared everybody, and made some people say, "Nice costume!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she tried to kill 2 stones with one bird!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billymac: "Those there are award winnin'' cows." BubbaJr.: "What''d they do?" Billymac: "They''re outstandin'' in their field"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if..... you went weeks without food or shelter just so you could have front row seats to a Brooks-n''-Dunn concert.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If "poly" means "many" and a tic is a bloodsucking creature, than what are politicians?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog without legs? It doesn''t matter - he won''t come, anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond and her friends went to a bank to rob it. The blond''s job was to get the code for the vault they wanted to rob. Finally, the blond came back to the vault and began punching in numbers. Each time she typed in a number it beeped a different sound. A friend asked, "Do you know the code?" The blond said, "No, but listen." She made a whole bunch of beeps then said, "It''s the funky town music!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.)Why do kids pick their nose? A.)BECAUSE THEY ARE TOO DARN LAZY TO GET A TISSUE AND THEIR FAVORITE SHOW IS ON. EVEN THOUGH THEY''VE SEEN IT 1 HUNDRED TIMES, CAN''T MISS A SECOND TO GET A TISSUE, WHEN THEY HAVE THEIR FINGER FOR FAST AND EASY ANSWER FOR THEIR BOGERY NOSE! Q.) How do you make them stop? A.) Glue a tissue box full of tissues to their head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) What does a blond think a leprechaun is? A.) An elf. But she only sees it when it''s near the holidays and has drunk an Irish drink. Even though her parents keep telling her they aren''t real...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do people have small dogs? A: So they can carry them in their bags, and when the person farts, they can blame it on the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To all who do NOT believe in evolution, I have proof: MY spaghetti from two weeks ago has started growing arms and legs and I think it just called me, "Mommy". By the way, I, myself, do NOT believe in the theory of evolution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re a redneck if: The only thing you swing a bat at is a mailbox.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: Your mother has ammo on her Christmas list!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: Directions to your house include ''''Turn off the paved road...''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The funniest bumper sticker is: Keep honking I''m reloading!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: You like to brag you learned to fire a shotgun before you could walk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do cats go to find their tail? The retail store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a grape say when it gets squished? Nothing, it just lets out a little whine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many employers motivate workers with bonuses. Some offer gym memberships, a few even supply day care for their working mothers and fathers. Our bosses go a step further. A sign posted in our break room read: New Incentive Plan . . . Work or get fired!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a man with three daughters. The first daughter(a Brunette) comes up and says "Daddy why''d you name me Daisy" the dad says" ''cause when you were born a daisy fell on your head." The second daughter (a red-head) comes up and says "Daddy why''d you name me Rose" the dad says "''cause when you were born a rose fell on your head." The third daughter (a blonde) comes up and says "kjaglifvgjlfj" the dad says "SHUTUP CINDERBLOCK"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be schizophrenic, but now we''re just fine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many polititians does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 Clinton to start the screwing enitiative, Nixon to steal public tax money to campain for the support of the light bulb initiative, Jimmy Carter to bore people to death about the campain Reagan to reasure the American public that it is necesary and ok to change the light bulb Bush jr. to make a mess of the initiative........ .........and Hillary to come smack the s#%@ out of her husband for screwing around!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes, I worry about you... But then i remember that my mom told me never to anthropomorphize.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman is having a problem with her closet door, it was falling off every time a bus was passing by. So she called a repair man. The repairman comes and sees that indeed, the door falls off every time a bus passes by. "OK, I''m going to see what is going on, just close the door behind me" and he steps into the closet. Just then, the husband comes from work, opens the closet and finds the repairman. Husband: "What the hell are you doing here!" Repairman: "Well, you''re not going to believe it, but I''m waiting for a bus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar and orders three whiskey sours, drinks them down BAM! BAM! BAM! Then he orders three more. The bartender''s having a slow night and appreciates the business, but is also concerned. "Hey buddy, slow down. What seems to be the problem?" The guy answers, "I went on a week-long business trip, and had to leave my wife alone. I''ve had my suspicions about our next-door neighbor, so I hung a weight from the bottom of the bedspring just above a bowl of cream." The bartender nods sympathetically and pours the guy another. "So you came home and found cream on the weight?" The guy downs his fourth whiskey sour and says, "It''s worse than that. The cream had turned into butter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) What kind of service has a two for one "Tuesday" special? A.) Yo mama!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy came back from school and noticed that his father was wearing his weeding ring at the wrong finger. He asked his father, "Why are you wearing your ring on the wrong hand and finger?" And the father said,"Because I married the wrong wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why don''t blond chicks date blond guys? A: To avoid inbreeding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vini vedi velcro (I came, I saw, I stuck around)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So two farmers are standing next to a cow and one farmer says: 1st guy: "Hey Larry, you know how your birthday''s tomorrow?" 2nd guy: "Uh huh." 1st guy: "I made a cake." 2nd guy: "Uh huh." ......*long pause*...... Cow: "Hey Larry, you know how your birthday''s tomorrow?" 2nd guy:"Uh huh." Cow: "I made a pie." 2nd guy:"Uh huh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) Why do homeless people love to go to church? A.) There is always free water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Are A Redneck If: You light a match in your bathroom and it blows your house off its wheels!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lion wearing a hat? A Dandy Lion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) Why did the dog go to court? A.) Because it got a barking ticket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is a cheerleader''s favorite drink? A: Root Beer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you ask a Bears fan what his or her two favorite teams are they would be: - The Bears - And whoever the Green Bay Packers are playing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Blondie, do swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you, god? Yes I do. ------------------------------------------------------------ Q. Mrs. Blondie did you ever stay all night with this man in California? A. I refuse to answer that question. Q. Did you ever stay all night with this man in Michigan? A. I refuse to answer that question. Q. Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami? A. No.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8 dumb headlines! Can you figure out what they are trying to say? 1. Subway Finds Dirtier Subways After Cleaning Jobs Were Cut -New York times 2. Study Finds Sex, Pregnancy Link -Cornell Daily Sun 3. Low Wages Said Key To Poverty -Newsday 4. Malls Try To Atract Shoppers- Baltimore Sun 5. Official: Only Rain Will Cure Drought -Westport Herald News 6. Teenage Girls Often Have Babies Fathered By Men- Oregonian 7. Man Shoots Neighbor With Machete 8. Free Advice: Bundle Up When Out In The Cold -Lexington Herald-Leader', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m racist because I have colored TV.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to Mexican with a high salary? Can I have ketchup on those fries?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kung Chow called his boss and said: "Hey, boss I not come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomach ache, leg hurt, I not come work." The boss says: "Kung Chow I really need you today. When I feel sick like this I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes me feel better and I can go to work. You should try that." Two hours later Kung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what you say and I feel great, I be at work soon. You got nice house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Chinese people call their retarded son? Sum Ting Wong', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now I haven''t known you very long and I shouldn''t be asking you for this so soon, but I really need it badly. I haven''t had it for a while and I can already feel it going in good and hard and coming out nice and soft. If you would do this for me no one would ever know. I am sure you can satisfy my needs and I''d be very grateful if you would. I am very desperate and I need your help. You must think by now that I have a lot of nerve but I can feel my tongue wrapping around it and sucking out all the juices until it''s very dry. I am not going to beat around the bush any longer, so - Do you have a piece of gum?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Christian, playing an active role in his church''s activites, backslided and started leading a wayward life. He was usually drunk most of the time and on one occasion, as he was staggering back home after leaving a beer parlor, he fell into a gutter. He staggered back up, put one leg inside the gutter and kept going like that until his pastor saw him. "What are you doing brother?" the pastor asked while pulling him out of the gutter. The drunk then started shouting, "I am healed, I am healed, praise the Lord." The embarrassed pastor then said, "I only pulled you out of the gutter," The drunk then stuttered, "Lord of Mercy, I thought I had been crippled by God."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless! P.S. This works for just about any instrument player.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers? WELL HUNG', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) What do you call an ant from overseas? A) Important', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cannibal went to a brain store one day because he was craving brains. he decided he wanted to try a musician''s brains to see if they taste any different. He looked around and saw the prices. Trumpet Brains-$25.00/pound Trombone Brains-$1.00/pound Percussion Brains- 10.00/pound Tuba Brains-$0.50/pound Colorguard Brains-$0.25/pound Clairinet Brains-$1000.00/pound Flute Brains-$0.50/pound So the cannibal turned and saw a man that worked there. He said to the guy: "Why are the clarinet brains so expensive?" The man replied "DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY CLAIRINET PLAYERS YOU HAVE TO KILL TO GET ONE POUND OF BRAINS?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Kermit the Frog''s middle name? The.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so poor, she cleans her shoes with a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wow, said Joan after she saw that her friend got glasses. "You like my new glasses?", asked Peter. "Yep. They make you look really smart.", replied Joan. "I know. That''s what my mom said. That''s why I wear them in math class."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat, that when she finally lost her spare tire, she still had an 18 wheeler to go!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the popsicle say to the lollypop as he was leaving? So long, sucker!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the lollipop say to the popsicle? ''Cool, dude!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey! Is that your head or did your neck blow a bubble?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the turkey cross the road? A: Because the chicken had the day off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: Your shotgun is named after your girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you have the same number of teeth as you have fingers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever killed someone over a "kick me" sign.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever searched for gold in your grandpa''s chest and had your fingers taken off by the booby trap within.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you won money of your dead grandpa by playing poker with him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever had to towel dry after a fart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you have a glass eye collection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: Your pet groundhog has ever bitten more than one of your thumbs off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: one wall of your home is a tarp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was a little boy, I was considered clever for my age. When you were a little boy, you must have eaten paint chips.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies? A) 25! One to mix the batter and 24 to peel the m&m''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought some powdered water but I don''t know what to add to it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a dog the other day. I named him Stay. It''s fun to call him. "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell when you''re out of invisible ink?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier. I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Droughts happen because God didn''t pay his water bill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Change is inevitable... except from vending machines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ahhhh... "Mike! What''s wrong?" "I-I had a nightmare." "What was the nightmare?" "I-I-" "Yes?" "I-I-" "Spit it out!" "I-I went to heaven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve shaved off your eyebrows and taped them to a little kid''s back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: You''ve ever bought steel-toed boots, only to remove the steel to patch a hole in your trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever had a family feud over a litter of coondogs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you use a handful of creek mud as birth control.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know how old hags tell time? * ** *** **** ***** ****** ******* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** ** * ** *** **** ***** ****** ******* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** ** * ** *** **** ***** ****** ******* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** ** * ** *** **** ***** ****** ******* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** ** * A witch-watch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The problem with keeping an open mind is that all my ideas tend to fall out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever held a lifelong grudge over a spelling bee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(This is from my friend, Mitchell. It was very funny at first when we first heard him say it at lunch, and I figured I would share it.) Yo Momma''s so fat, she ate a grenade and the explosion didn''t even make it out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever gotten a headache reading the newspaper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever dislodged a sunflower seed from the corner of your eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a little boy came up to a man at the park. The boy asked the man, "Why do you have a big nose?" The man answered, "Because...I have big fingers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat , She uses a pillow for a tampon. ------------------------------------ Yo momma is so stupid , That when her boyfriend said, "Lets do it doggie-style tonight," she sat down and licked her ass. ------------------------------------- Yo momma is so dumb , That she was arrested for taking a dump at a construction site next to a sign that read, "Dump waste here." ------------------------------------- Yo momma is so fat , That when she farted, your dad ran away yelling, "It''s a tornado. Hide!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My goal is to find a soulmate. It''s not cheating, just multi-tasking.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which sweet is very clever? A Smartie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the hand cross the road? A: To get to the second-hand shop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Toby. Toby who? Toby or not toby that is the question!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) What is: Black White Black White Black White? A) A nun rolling down a hill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been following the ongoing Evolution vs Intelligent Design controversy, and as a card-carrying botanist, I''m a very strong supporter of Darwin. But still, there are things in life that rational science simply cannot explain. Like Paris Hilton...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many acountants does it take to change a lightbulb? A. 1 at a fixed rate of 3.5% income return after purchase for every bulb replaced over a 6 year plan, with projected inflation expected to rise to over $1.25 per bulb in 2006.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s arms are so short that she has to tilt her head to scratch her ears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THIS JOKE IS NOT MEANT TO OFFEND ANYBODY There''s this guy Joe who has a parrot that he adores. Well, Joe has to go on a trip and doesn''t know what to do about his parrot. Three of his buddies, who live together, offer to take him in. The three guys are Norwegian, Swiss, and African-American. Joe completely trusts these guys so he leaves his parrot with them for the week. When Joe comes back he find his bird all bandaged up. He has a broken wing, a fractured leg, and bruises all over. He asks his parrot, "Well, what happened?" The parrot replies "I kind of got beat up" Joe asks, "Was it the Norwegian?" The parrot says, "No, he was very nice." Joe again asks, "Well, was it the Swiss?" The parrot replies,"Nope, not at all." Joe say "So it was the " The parrot cuts him off, says, "We don''t use that word any more."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One beautiful morning, a husband and wife decided to go for a drive in the country. Unfortunately, no matter which road they took, they kept seeing dead possums lying on the shoulder. After several miles of this, the husband turned to his wife and said, "Now I think I know the answer to the age-old question ''Why did the chicken cross the road?''" "What is it?" she asked. "Well," he replied, "it was to prove to the possums that it could be done."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Accordion. Accordion who? Accordion to the t.v., it''s going to be cold out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You should have no doubt in your mind that you are in a redneck family..... When your uncle drunkenly approaches you, slaps you on the back, grabs your face and murmurs "Heaeh kiiiiiiid, I think it''s a good thing I used a condum. And walks off slowy, mumbling. "Cause your mamoo gets realy piiist when she''s pregnant........" And in disbelief, you look around to find your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so ugly, that they pushed her face into cookie dough to make gorilla cookies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When everything''s coming up roses, it''s time to celebrate. But, when everything''s coming up daisies, it''s time to mourn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s father says to him, "When you go back to your Mom''s tonight, give her this envelope. Tell her that since you are now 18 this is the LAST check she''ll ever see from me for child support. Then, stand back and watch the expression her face." "OK" replied Little Johnny. Later when Little Johnny got home he said to his mom, "Mom, Dad asked me to give you this envelope. He said to tell you that since I''m now 18 this is the LAST child support payment he''ll ever have to make to you. Now I''m supposed to stand back and watch the expression on your face." "Next time you visit your father tell him that after 18 years I have decided to inform him that he''s not your father. Then, stand back and watch the expression on HIS face." replied Little Johnny''s mother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long does it take a blond to change a lightbulb? They never change it, by the time they''ve realized that it''s broken, the world would of ended.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A middle-aged guy is out to dinner with his wife to celebrate her fortieth birthday. He says, "So what would you like, Julie? A Jaguar? A sable coat? A diamond necklace?" She says, "Bernie, I want a divorce." "My goodness," he says, "I wasn''t planning on spending that much."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The voluptuous blonde entered the dentist''s office in an obvious state of agitation. She sat down in the chair and fidgeted nervously as the dentist prepared his utensils. "Oh, doctor," she exclaimed, as he prepared to look into her mouth. "I''m so afraid of dentists. Why, I think I''d rather have a baby than have a tooth drilled." "Well, miss," said the dentist impatiently, "better make up your mind before I adjust the chair."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The blonde teenage girl had long been infatuated with a popular local disc jockey and finally got to meet him when the station held an open house. When she seductively suggested they get better acquainted, he took her into a vacant studio and unzipped his pants. "I suppose you know what this is?" he whispered. "I sure do," she said, grasping it in her hand and putting it near her mouth, "I''d like to say hello to Ricky, Bobby, Tina and the whole gang down at Danny''s Pizzeria."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always follow my first instinct, That is unless I second guess myself. --------------------------------------------- Why don''t you have a drink, your only driving to a funeral right? --------------------------------------------- Why buy a watch from the competitor, I thought time was against us? ---------------------------------------------- You must be smart, because you just confused us all. ----------------------------------------------', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock,knock.... Who''s there? Fortification. Fortification who? Fortification, we''re going to Miami. --------------------------------------------- Knock,knock.... Who''s there? Carl. Carl who? Carl get you there faster than a bike. -----------------------------------------------', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While on a game show, Justins had to identify a number of sounds. When she heard this: *laughter then plop, plop, plop* she identified it correctly right away. What did she say? An audience laughing it''s head off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t vegetarian women scream during orgasms? They refuse to admit that a piece of meat gives them pleasure!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a man is in a forest, talking to himself, with no women around, is he still wrong? If a woman is in a forest, talking to herself, with no man around, is she still complaining? -------------------------------------------------------- Did you know that the shortest sentence in the English language is "I am"? Did you know that the longest sentence is "I do"? -------------------------------------------------------- Sex is hereditary. If your parents didn''t have it, chances are that you won''t either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Italian Mafia Don is dying, so he calls his grandson to his bed. "Grandson, I wanna you lissin to me. I wanna you for you to take my chrome plated 38 revolver so you will always remember me." "But grandpa, I really don''t like guns, ... how about leaving me your Rolex watch instead." "You lissin to me. Somma day you gonna be runna da bussiness, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big home and maybe a couple of bambina. Am I right?" "Yes grandpa, I guess so." "Ok, so soma day you gonna come home and maybe finda you wife in bed with anotha man. Whada you gonna do? Pointa to da watch and say, ... TIMES UP!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might just be a redneck if your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde and a screendoor have in common? The harder you bang them the looser they get. Why did the blonde climb the glass wall? To see what was on the other side. What is the first thing a blonde does in the morning? Get dressed and go home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nicholaas (toe 4) het by sy ouma gaan kuier, en ouma het dit goed gedink om hom bietjie groentes te leer eet wat sy ma nie graag gaar maak nie. Die spesifieke dag is broccoli aan die beurt, en ouma versin die oulikste stories oor die boompies wat hy gaan proe. Hy begin ewe entosiasties aan die eerste een eet, maar ouma sien hy kou al stadiger en kry so veraf trek in sy ogies. "Ouma," roep hy toe sy ouma wat intussen in die spens verdwyn het, "kom kyk hier!" Die mannetjie beduie toe na sy bord waar hy die laaste "boompie" staan gemaak het, mooi vasgedruk in die middel van die rys. "Kyk net, hierdie is die Paradys, en daardie boom is die boom waarvan God ges het ons mag nie eet nie!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blond have blisters on her lips? From trying to blow out lightbulbs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a blond busy? Write "please turn over" on both sides of a paper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One blond to another: "The electicity break down was terrible. I was stuck in the lift for 2 hours." The other blond: "That''s nothing, I stood on the elevator for 6 hours!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wat is die toppunt van geraas? 2 geraamtes wat woellig spyker op n sinkdak met n coke blikkie as n kondoom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pappa : jy moet nou soet wees, ek gan jou tottie afkap. Seuntjie : kan ma afkap, want sussie sin is klaar af en omgedop en dit lyk BEFOK!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prostitute shouting accross the street - "Hey, black boy! You want a blow job?" He shouts back "Fuck off! I don''t want ANY job!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a kid asks where rain comes from, I tell him, "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, I tell him, "Probably because of something you did."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old, she still owes Moses a dollar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: You''ve ever carved a gunstock out of a bedpost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college student at a recent college football game challenged a senior citizen sitting next to him, saying it was impossible for their generation to understand this: "You grew up in a different world," the student said, loud enough for the whole crowd to hear. "Today we have television, jet planes, space travel, man has walked on the Moon, our spaceships have visited Mars, we even have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing ... and uh ....." Taking advantage of a pause in the student''s litany, the senior citizen said, "You''re right. We didn''t have those things when we were young; so we invented them, you little twit! What are *you* doing for the next generation???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock. Who''s there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes me, who''s you? (This is me, who''s you.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is illegal to stick coins in your ears in the state of Hawaii.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were the police at the baseball game? Because someone stole second base!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat and dumb, she used Antarctica as a popsicle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mommo so stupid when she was drowning, she ate a Lifesaver. Lifesaver is a candy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('100,000 Sperm And You Were The Fastest?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Famous last words: "Ok, I''m only going to have one..." -- Said the polygamist right after marrying his first wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, whenever she turns around--there goes another city. Yo momma is so fat, whenever she sits down she lowers all the prices at wal-mart. Yo momma is so fat, whenever she turns around it''s your birthday. Yo momma is so fat, NASA engineers mistook her for a new planet. Yo momma is so fat, it takes 1000 years to design clothes for her Yo momma is so fat, whenever she gets weighed she breaks the scale. You''re so fat, I wonder if it''s because of yo momma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your dad bought you a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for Christmas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, I told her Christmas was right around the corner - so she went looking for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a bus; she''s big, doesn''t smell very good, and it''s only a dollar a ride.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a species will be extinct.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so stupid, she bought a video tape on how to fix your VCR!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so poor, she has to chase down the garbage truck with a shopping list!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so old --- she knew Burger King when he was a prince! yo momma is so poor --- I saw her banging on the dumpster and I asked her what she was doing and she said "My kids locked me out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Best Friend to Former Fat Guy: Hey man, you''re looking good. Looks like you lost lots of pounds. Any secrets? Former Fat Guy: Eating dates. Best Friend: Oh yeah? I''ve read that compared to other foods, dates have the highest anti-oxidant values. How much and how many times a week do you eat dates? Former Fat Guy: Oh just one date every week-end. I eat first before I fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call when god takes a crap? Holy shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man from Peking and a first generation Chinese American woman get married. On the wedding night he climbs into bed next to her and tries to be reassuring, saying, "My darling, I know this is your first time and you must be frightened." She says that is true but she will do anything he wants. The groom says "Let''s start with 69." And she says, "You want broccoli with beef?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows were in a field grazing. First cow says, "MOO." Second cow says, "You asshole, I was gonna say that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yankee Doodle went to town A-riding on his mother Every time he hit a bump He had another brother!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his girlfriend are having a sexual encounter. He asks her to "go downtown" so, with a sigh, she gets on her knees in front of him and starts peering at his genitals, looking and tipping her head this way and that, studying the whole business. After about five minutes of this, he asked her in a sort of peeved voice, "Well, just what are you doing?" She replies, "I''m doing what I always do when I''m downtown with no money!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 2 nuns and 3 prostitutes on a football field? 2 Tight Ends and 3 Wide Receivers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, Knock Who''s there? Ya Ya - who? I didn''t know you could yodel! Yahoooo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly that when you entered an ugly contest, out of 10,000 people, you won first place!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re like a Wendy''s. The drive through is open till 1am or later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good friend will say: "I love you!" (In a sarcastic tone) A best friend will say: "I love you, you f***in'' b****!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the little black boy get for his birthday? Your bike.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does it take 3 women with PMS to change a lightbulb? BECAUSE IT JUST DOES, OK!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TOP GEORGE BUSH SLOGANS 1. I''ll turn capital punishment into a new game show! 2. I promise to get cocaine off our streets: 1 kilo at a time. 3. I''ll finish what Bill started -- the interns. 4. Like father, like son. You liked my dad, right? 5. Vote for the GOP, Not OPP. 6. I promise no sex scandal: just look at me. 7. New penal plan: I won''t use mine! 8. Read my lips: Al Gore Sucks. 9. George W. Bush: No hang-ups. Just hangovers 10. Vote for Bush and against Common Sense', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat she stood on a talking scale and it said, "1,2,3 GET THE HELL OFF OF ME!!!!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Me Me who? Who the hell is me-who???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most racist animal in the world? A parrot bacause Polly wants a cracker not a nigger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call 50 black guys in a hole? A: Afro-Turf', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a little boy came over to his friends house and said, "Ah shit! I got gunk on my shoe!" As he was saying it, the friend''s dad came over to the little boy and said, "How dare you say that in front of my child!" The dad sent the little boy home and called his father, telling him to come over to his house and talk to him. The father came over and said, "So what if my boy said that? it''s not like your kids haven''t overheard you say a curse word!" "Actually they haven''t!" claimed the disgruntled father. As they argue, the disgruntled father''s baby in the backround blurts out, "Fuck you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly, you scare blind children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly when you were born your parents named you "Shit Happens"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly instead of taking you to the doctor your mom took you to the vet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prior to her trip to Texas, Buffy (a New Yorker) confided to her sorority sisters she had three goals for her trip to the Lone Star State. She wanted to taste some real Texas Barbeque, take in a bona fide rodeo and have sex with a real cowboy. Upon her return, her sorority sisters were curious as to how she fared. "Let me tell you, they have a tree down there called a Mesquite and when they slow cook that brisket over that Mesquite, it''s oh so good. The taste is unbelievable!" And, I went to a real rodeo... Talk about athletes! Those guys wrestle full-grown bulls! They ride horses at a full gallop then jump off the horses and grab the bulls by the horns and throw them to the ground! It is just incredible!" They then asked, "Well tell us, did you have sex with a real cowboy?" "Are you kidding? Once I saw the outline of the condom they carry in the back pocket of their jeans, I changed my mind!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile, Robin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t a gypsy man walk right? Because he has crystal balls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('>God made mud,<<<< >>God made dirt,<<<< >>>God made guys,<< >>>>So girls can flirt!<', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you''re stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, the bitch caused an eclipse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there Icee Icee who I see you in there now let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asked his mother what the word "shit" meant. The mother didn''t know what to say, so she said it meant "food". Then he asked what the word "nigger" meant. She still did not know what to say, so she said "priest". The last word he asked about was "fuck". She really did not know what to say so she said "to get dressed". When the priest came over, the boy said to the priest, "Hey, nigger, the shit is on the table and my mom and dad are fucking in the room".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ronnie never listens in science class because he says it''s boring.. One day his teacher asked, "Ronnie, What are the 3 states of matter?" Since he heard his name he did listen to the question. So he thinks for a second and replies, "Texas, Florida, and Arkansas!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aoccdrnig to rscheearch codnutced at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy,it deosn''t mttaer waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are tpyed,the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit oedrer. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey ltteer by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You so ugly, you make President Bush look hot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s green, fuzzy, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree, can kill you? A: A pool table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so ghetto, her wedding cake was made out of cornbread.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) You''re so poor that when somebody rings the doorbell you have to stick your head out the window and yell, "Ding-Dong!" 2) You''re so poor that when I asked if I could use the bathroom at your house your mom gave me two sticks, one to hold the ceiling up and one to fight the cockroaches. 3) You''re so poor that your house is 5 square yards, one floor and no walls. 4) You''re so poor that your house is very dark because you can''t afford a light bulb. 5) You''re so poor that you live in an out-house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he felt crumby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Zero: For all blondes know, the lightbulb is still burning bright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She points him to the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter. She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?" He answers, " You see, it''s like this. Yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes. She came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers saying, ''It''s sooo much cheaper!'' So, I figure if I have to roll my own. So does she."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A: A quarter pounder with cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice. Weight Watchers will meet at 7PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double door at the side entrance. Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for tests. Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan who are preparing for the birth of their first child. The Lutheran Men''s group will meet at 6PM. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread, and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the scientist install a door knocker on his door and not a door bell? A: He wanted to win the No-Bell (Nobel) prize!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a blonde who goes to a pizza parlor. When she orders, she asks for her pizza to be cut up into 6 slices instead of eight. Why? A: She''s not hungry enough to eat eight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Wet. Wet who? Wet me in! It''s waining!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Did you hear the story about the peacock? A: It''s a beautiful tail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did George Washington sleep standing up? A: He couldn''t lie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two turds were sitting beside each other in a toilet, when one looks to the other and says, "man, you smell like shit".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a rabbit and a cow? A: One''s a rabbit and one is a cow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why DIDN`T the skull cross the road? A: Because he didn`t have the guts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the frog cross the road? A: He was tied onto the chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so ugly, that when she met the ugliest man on Earth, he shrieked in terror and jumped out the window.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fish + alien transpotation = Unidentified Frying Object', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What goes, "KCAUQ, KCAUQ"? A: A duck flying backwards!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BOB: Have you changed the water in the fish bowl yet? MARGE: No, it hasn''t drunk the water I gave it a week ago.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe in evolution and if you don''t I will let you meet my relatives.... Then you''ll believe me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love you is eight letters, but so is "bull shit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I decided to kill the sexiest person alive, but then I realized suicide is illegal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I often dream of the day when my car will be able to drive me home after a long hard day of work. That''s about the time the driver next to me abruptly blows his horn telling me to wake up and get back into my own lane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the blond Think Tank? Once they got it got started, it drove through three houses and a convienence store before they figured out how to stop it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('East to the Sea, West to the Land, Death to the B***h that touches my Man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mario, I am in so much pain right now I can barely sit. Leave the mushrooms for the adventures and out of the bedroom. "Fine Princess. Yoshi, let''s go." "No, no...Yoshi can stay."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q-If the big breasted women work at Hooters, where does the one legged woman work? A-Ihop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old she got an autographed copy of the bible.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My T.V. has more channels then your IQ, and I DON''T EVEN HAVE CABLE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she sat on a rainbow skittles popped out! Yo momma so fat she tripped broke her leg and gravy poured out! Yo mommas so stupid when I said it was chilly out she grabbed a spoon and ran out! Yo momma so fat she IS the family reunion! Yo momma so skinny she hula hoops with cheerios! Yo momma so flat she jealous of the wall! Yo momma so fat when you get on top her your ears pop! Yo momma so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dog to play with her! Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry! Yo momma so ugly rice krispies wont talk to her! har-de-har har old school jokes for you old school insulters...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some old school insults for yall... You depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. So dumb you couldnt hold water in a bucket. Happiness: seeing your picture on a milk carton. Your mouth rarely makes calls to the brain. Missing a layer of insulation in your attic. You''re so fat, when you turn around people throw you a welcome back party. You''re so fat, you have to put a belt on with a boomerang. You''re so slow, you have to speed up to stop. You''re so fat, when you go to the zoo elephants throw peanuts at you. The eyes are open, the mouth moves, but Mr. Brain has long since departed. The cheese slid off his cracker. Alright, I''m gonna save the rest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor doctor! I feel like a pack of cards! "I''ll deal with you later!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you help a starving cannibal? A: Give him a hand!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day in the 1800''s a father asked his child to go get some nuts and berries. She went around and got nuts and berries from every boy she knew. When she showed her dad he said, "That''s not what I meant!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Did you hear the joke about the jump rope? A: No, I skipped it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I shake your head, all I hear is echo echo echo...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your face is sad. Not that you''re crying, it''s that I feel sorry for you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly that your momma cried when she saw you after birth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly that when it''s Christmas, instead of giving you toys, Santa gives you plastic bags to cover your face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you keep an idiot busy? A. Tell him that the ground is going to fall on him if he doesn''t get off it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so stupid, she walked into an antique shop and asked "What''s New?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so dumb she dj''s for the ice cream truck!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she leaves stretch marks in the bath tub.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How women think about sex: At 8, ignore it. At 18, experience it. At 28, look for it. At 38, ask for it. At 48, beg for it. At 58, pay for it. At 68, pray for it. At 78, forget it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid says to mom:"The babysitter''s an angel! She was naked in the garden and screamed God I''m coming! Lucky daddy was holding her from behind to keep her here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the new name for a taxi in Oshakati? A computer. Why? It has windows, always crashes, & is driven by a thin black floppy with a virus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The cat was chasing the rooster around on the farm, then the cat fell in the water and the rooster laughed. Lesson: For every wet pussy there is a happy cock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman tells man: :"I demand good manners in bed just like at the dinner table." So man gets into bed slowly, smiles & says: "Honey, would u please pass me the vagina?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good: You & Your wife decide not to have kids. Bad: Your wife can''t find the birth control pills Ugly: You daughter borrowed them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Japanese girl accidentally lets out a disturbing fart after making love! She said: "Aww, so sorry. Excuse please, front hole so happy, back hole laugh out loud!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the cannibal who was late to dinner? He got the cold shoulder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a cop stops you he gives you a ticket,when a cop stops me he gives me his number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so ugly you make Bin Landen look like a god.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom: I''ve got a great knock-knock joke. Bill: Ok, let''s hear it. Tom: You start. Bill: Knock-knock. Tom: Who''s there? Bill: ???????????? (dumbfounded)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After enlisting in the 82nd Airborne Division, I eagerly asked my Recruiter what I could expect from jump school. "Well," he said, "it''s three weeks long." "What else," I asked. "The first week they separate the men from the boys," he said. "The second week, they separate the men from the fools." "And the third week?" I asked. "The third week, the fools jump."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The perfect man and the perfect woman got married, had a perfect honeymoon, and got a perfect car. One day, they were driving along and Santa Claus was on the side of the road. His sleigh had broken down, and he needed a ride to the next town. The perfect couple were nice, and let him hitch a ride. Well, they were driving along when they crashed into a tree. Only one of them lived. Who? The perfect woman. Why? There is no such thing as Santa Claus, and God knows that there isn''t any such thing as a perfect man! ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gentleman walks into bar, and to his horror, sees a screaming naked lady tied to the wall while the bartender licks her! The guy runs out and calles the police.He is even more horrified when the police say there is nothing they can do; the bartender has lick-her (liquor) license.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Known fact amongst all men: Having sex can help combat asthma and hay fever, now we need to inform all women!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your teeth are so yellow the sun should be shy to show it self!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With a lousy year under his belt a tractor salesman was traveling down a dusty back road in Iowa, when he came across a farmer working his field with an old, broken down tractor. He jumped out of his truck and gave his best sales pitch to the old guy. The farmer stroked his chin and said, "The other day I was getting ready to milk Betsy. I was just getting started when she kicked me with her left leg. So I grabbed me a piece of rope and tied her leg to the stall. Just as I was starting again, she kicked me with her right leg. I grabbed another piece of rope and tied leg to the other side of the stall. I''ll be darned if when I started again she smacked in the face with her tail. I grabbed another piece of rope and tied her tail to the rafter above. Mister, if you can convince my wife that I was just trying to milk that cow, I''ll buy a tractor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someday your prince charming will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No one dies a virgin, life screws us all!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. -Poor Bear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heaven won''t take me and hell''s afraid I''ll take over. -Unknown (boardofwisdom.com)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the bee say to the naughty bee? Bee-Hive your self', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a guy asked a blond to take a survey, she asked, "Do I have to bring it back?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MEXICAN VIRUS BUENOS DIAS!! JOU HAVE YUST RECEIVED A MEHICAN BIRUS!!! SINCE WE NOT SO TECHNOLOGICALLY ADBANCED IN MEHICO, DIS IS A MANUAL BIRUS. PLEASE DELETE ALL THE FILES ON JOUR HARD DRIVE JOURSELF AND SEND THIS E-MAIL TO EBERYONE JOU KNOW. TAN JOU POR YELPING ME. JULIO MANUEL JOSE FEDENZIO RODRIGUEZ GARCIA , MEXICAN HACKER', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up two prostitutes and >>take >>them to their separate hotel >>rooms. >> >>The first dwarf, however, is unable to get an erection. His >>depression >>is made worse by the fact that, >>from the next room, he hears his little friend shouting out cries >>of >>"Here I come again ... ONE, TWO, >>THREE... UUH!" all night long. >> >>In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, "How did it go?" >>The first mutters, "It was so embarrassing. I simply couldn''t get >>an >>erection." >> >>The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that''s embarrassing? >> >>"I couldn''t even get on the bed.."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are hanging from a pole to see who can hang the longest. The blonde is showing off by hanging from one hand. The brunette says, "I bet you can''t do no hands." The blonde takes the challenge and loses the contest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have learned to not jump out the window with a towel as a parachute. ..never throw a boomerang if you don''t know how to catch it. ..don''t fly a kite while facing towards the wind. ..don''t throw a cat on a dog. ..never leave a three year old alone with duct tape and glue ..don''t let a friend make you laugh while eating unless he/she knows the heimlich maneuver. ..don''t ditch school if you don''t know the way back home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do mice say when they see the moon?? A: "Ooh, Cheese!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While driving to work, I found myself behind an old Ford Falcon, with five teenage boys inside. The best part was the bumper sticker in the center of the rear window. It read: DON''T LAUGH, YOUR DAUGHTER COULD BE IN HERE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed appoint', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I worked in the tourist industry in Florida, we got to wear some of the buttons that were for sale. My favorite read : We love serving tourists; I like mine well done!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I almost got fired for telling this joke at work: Do you know why fireman have bigger balls than policeman? They sell more tickets!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An architect, an artist and an accountant were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there. The accountant said, "I like both." "Both?" The accountant replied "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the office and get some work done."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the accountant, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was watching my friend instant message. She was talking to a kid that she knew. The kid had lost his hat. I suggested, rather foolishly, to look in his nose. (As a joke, of course) My friend typed this. He then wrote (without seeing the message that my friend wrote) I''m going to look there on Monday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do we look at a calendar to find what date it is, when we don''t know the date?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a duck walked into a drugstore and bought some lipstick. She walked up to the clerk and said, "Put it on my bill!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is it we look in a dictionary to figure out how to spell something if we don''t know how to spell it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Oscar Oscar who? Ask her a silly question, get a silly answer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb, She invented water proof tea bags.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An ejector seat on a helicopter. A fly screen on a submarine. An ashtray for a motorcycle. A lead balloon. A bikini for Eskimos. Sugar-cube fishing bait. A glass baseball bat..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Doctor, Doctor! My son swallowed a pen, what should I do? Use a pencil instead! 2.Doctor, Doctor! I think I''m getting shorter! You''ll just have to be a little patient. 3.Doctor, Doctor! I''m invisible! I''m sorry, sir, I can''t see you right now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Send him to the store for tampons, telling him to ask which is the best brand. 2. When he tells you he loves you say, "I do, wait, I don''t love you!" 3. Tell him you''re a covicted serial killer everytime he asks you how are you. 4. Spill his favorite and most expensive cologne down the toilet and tell him he made me do it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a little boy and his father were having a conversation. The father asked the boy, "Can you say your ABC''s, son?" "Yes I can! A...B..C..." and he goes through the whole alphebet. The father then said, "That''s good, but can you say it backwords?" The boy smiles and says, "yeah", so he turns around and says, "A...B...C..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man called the computer company because he was having trouble with his computer. A woman answered the phone. "Hello. May I help you? "Yes. I''m having trouble with my computer. Every time I press the enter key my computer goes biserk." "I think I know what you should do." "Really?" "Yes." "What should I do?" "You should stop pressing the enter key."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s like 7-11... Cause she is open all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to the hospital with a sprained ankle. The doctor said, "Don''t worry, you''ll be walking in no time." He was. The doctor stole his car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick and Jane were arguing over the breakfast table. "Oh you''re so stupid!" shouted Dick. "Dick!" said their father, "That is enough! Now say you''re sorry!" "Okay," said Dick, "I am sorry you''re stupid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The King sent for his wise men all To find a rhyme for W. When they had thought for a time, But could not think of a single rhyme, "I''m sorry," he said," To trouble you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Taking advantage of a balmy day in New York, a priest and three other men of the cloth swapped their clerical garb for polos and khakis and time out on the golf course. After several really horrible shots, their caddy asked, "You guys wouldn''t be priests by any chance?" "Actually, yes, we are," one cleric replied. "How did you know?" "Easy," said the caddy, "I''ve never seen such bad golf and such clean language!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('knock-knock who''s there? duck duck who? duck I just threw a frisby at you!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who digs? Doug! A man who doesn''t dig? Douglas! A woman with a cat on her head? Kitty!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so old, she was stood up by King Tut, before he became a mummy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s a sunny morning in a big forest and the Bear family is just waking up. Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty! "Who''s been eating my porridge?" he squeaks. Daddy Bear arrives at the table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl. It is also empty! "Who''s been eating my porridge?" he roars. Mommy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch and screams, "For gosh sakes, how many times do we have to go through this crap? I haven''t made the porridge yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An application was for employment A program was a TV show A cursor used profanity And a keyboard was on a piano! Memory was something that you lost with age And a CD was a bank account And if you had a corrupted disk It would hurt when you found out! Compress was what you did to garbage Not something you did to a file And if you unzipped anything in public You''d be in jail for a while! Log on was adding wood to a fire A hard drive was a trip on the road A mouse pad was where a mouse lived And a backup happened to the commode! Cutting, you did with a pocket knife, Pasting, you did with glue. The Web was where a spider lived And a virus was the flu!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael Jordan made over $300,000 a game. That equals $10,000 a minute, at an average of 30 minutes per game. With $40 million in endorsements, he made $178,100 a day, working or not. If he sleeps 7 hours a night, he makes $52,000 every night while visions of sugarplums dance in his head. If he goes to see a movie, it will cost him $7.00, but he''ll make $18,550 while he''s there. If he wanted to save up for a new Acura NSX ($90,000), it would take him a whole 12 hours. He''ll probably pay around $200 for a nice round of golf, but will be reimbursed $33,390 for that round. If you were given a penny for every 10 dollars he made, you''d be living comfortably at $65,000 a year. In his last year, he made more than twice as much as all U.S. past presidents for all of their terms combined. However, if Jordan saves 100% of his income for the next 250 years, he''ll still have less than Bill Gates has today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child 1: Whatcha gonna do? Child 2: I''m gonna watch TV! Child 1: Guess what? I''m the QUEEN of the TV Freaks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone can be an Echo! 1] Repeat everything a person says & does in an exaggerated way 2] If your victim tries to get you to stop by saying something like, ''I''m a stupid furball,'' say '' at least you have the courage to admit it!'' 3]This is the most important instruction! DO NOT LET YOUR VICTIM NEAR A BOOK!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat that she uses all of Mexico as a tanning bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she needs to lose weight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) That''s not right - Sum Ting Wrong 2) Who are you with? - Hu Yu Hai Ding 3) See me ASAP - Kum Hai Nao 4) Stupid Man - Dum Gai 5) Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni 6) Did you go to the beach? - Wai Yu So Tan 7) I bumped into a coffee table - Ai Band Mai Ni 8) It''s very dark in here - Wai So Dim 9) I thought you were on a diet - Wai Yu Mun Ching 10) This is a tow away zone - No Pah Ding 11) Our meeting is next week - Wai Yu Kum Nao 12) Staying out of sight - Lai Ying Lo 13) He''s cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can hear mimes. You begin to talk to yourself, then disagree about the subject, get into a nasty row over it, lose, and refuse to speak to yourself for the rest of the night. The Sun is too loud. Teddy bears begin to bully you for milk and cookies. You ask the drive-thru attendant if you can get your order to go. You can skip without a rope. Trees start chasing you. Know Someone Who''s Stressed Out... Or You Just Want To Make Laugh? Pass This Forward Along Today!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Message from www.dating.com: Your dating ad has been on the net for 8 weeks without any answer! Do you rather want us to try one week without a picture?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn''t have signed up in the first place! When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk." Wouldn''t it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press ''Ctrl Alt Delete'' and start all over? Stress is when you wake up screaming and then you realize you haven''t fallen asleep yet. My husband says I never listen to him. At least I think that''s what he said. Just remember...if the world didn''t ****, we''d all fall off. If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor! Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever. But Most Of All, Remember ! A Friend Is Like A Good Bra. Hard to Find, Supportive, Comfortable, And Always Close To Your Heart!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two contracters were building a house. While they were sawing a board, the saw slipped and cut of one of the contracter''s ears off. They were looking through the sawdust and one contracter came up with the ear. He asked his co-worker, "Is this it?" The other one said "No, mine had a pencil behind it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: "It must be tough spending all day with your hands in someone''s mouth." Dentist: "I just think of it as having my hands in their wallet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you keep a cheepskate busy? A: Put him or her in a round room and tell them that you droped a $20 bill in the corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Tommy was sitting in class, the teacher came over and told him to go out in the hallway. He got mad and he didn''t move. Five minutes later, she came back over to him and tapped him on the shoulder. "I thought I told you to go out in the hallway." "I did," He told her lying through his teeth. "Ok then, so what did you do with your gifts?" she asked. "What gifts?" "Your mom was outside in the hallway holding some gifts for you for your birthday, did you not see her or were you lying to me?" So he ran outside the class but his mom was gone. He was very upset but as he was walking back into the class, the teacher said, "Gotcha, that will teach you to disobey me and lie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two guys walking down the street when they stumble upon a drunk. They walked up to him and the 1st guy said, "Sir, what is you name?" "My name is Jesus Christ!" slurred the drunk. "That can''t possibly be, what is your real name?" asked the 2nd man. The drunk repeated, "I told you my name is Jesus Christ!" The two men still didn''t believe him so the drunk told them to follow him as he walked into a nearby bar. It was then they heard the bartender say, "Jesus Christ, are you here again?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t need to write a joke! Whenever I see your face I start to laugh anyway!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the boy sprinkle sugar underneath his pillow that night? He wanted to have sweet dreams.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are llamas big and brown? Beacause if they were small & grey, they would be mice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is black & white an red all over? A penguin holding its breath!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What to a blonde is long and hard? 4th Grade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) How does a blonde kill a fish? She drowns it! 2) How does a blonde kill a bird? She throws it off a cliff! 3) How does a blonde lose 5 pounds? She takes off her make up! 4) Why does a blonde wash her hair in the sink? Because thats where you wash vegetables! 5) What did the blonde think of her new computer? She couldn''t get channel 9!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) Did you hear about the blond skydiver? She Missed! 2) What do you call a blonde holding a balloon? Twins! 3) Why doesn''t a blonde drive a BMW? Because she can''t spell it! 4) How is a blonde the same as a bottle? Thier both empty from the neck up! 5) Did you hear about the blonde that shot an arrow into the air? She missed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: John, why is your cat at school today? John: (crying)..I heard the milkman tell mom.."When the kid goes to school i''m gonna eat your pussy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What is brown and sticky? Answer: A stick! Duh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. During recess time, I like skipping rope. When I skip I shout a rhyme, And jump with all my hope. 2. I didn''t study for the test even though I should''ve. I was playing PS2 and I would''ve, so I copied off of yours, I got them all wrong, so now I sing this song. (sing over and over this is an endless song.) 3. Some gum chum? It''s watermelon, although I chewed it some, and it is jerybellum. (jerybellum - bubble gum co.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor doctor! I keep thinking I''m invisible! WHO SAID THAT?!?!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the male centipede say to the other male centipede when a female centipede walks by? That''s a nice pair of legs, pair of legs, pair of legs, pair of legs.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''a so stupid she stopped at a stop sign and waited untill it changed to ''Go!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than getting raped by Jack the Ripper? Getting fingered by Captain Hook.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the two lesbian frogs say to each other? We taste like chicken!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a clever midget and a venereal disease? One is a cunning runt and the other is a running cunt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a clitoris, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common? Men always miss them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, she turned medusa to stone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old lady sits on her front porch, rocking away the last days of her long life, when all of a sudden, a fairy godmother appears and informs her that she will be granted three wishes. "Well, now," says the old lady, "I guess I would like to be really rich." *** POOF *** Her rocking chair turns to solid gold. "And, gee, I guess I wouldn''t mind being a young, beautiful princess." *** POOF *** She turns into a beautiful young woman. "Your third wish?" asks the fairy godmother. Just then the old woman''s cat wanders across the porch in front of them. "Ooh - can you change him into a handsome prince?" she asks. *** POOF *** There before her stands a young man more handsome than anyone could possibly imagine. She stares at him, smitten. With a smile that makes her knees weak, he saunters across the porch and whispers in her ear, "Bet you''re sorry you had me neutered."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Warning - Please DO NOT look at the bottom of the page before you answer ALL the questions 1) What is a four-letter word that ends in k and means the same as intercourse? 2) What is it that a cow has four of and a woman has only two of? 3) What can you find in a man''s pants that is about six inches long, has a head on it, and that women love so much that they often blow it? 4) What word starts with f and ends with u-c-k? 5) What four letter word begins with f and ends with k, and if you can''t get one you can use your hands? 6) What is hard, six inches long, has two nuts, and can make a girl fat? 7) What is it that all men have one of; it''s longer on some men than on others; the pope doesn''t use his; and a man gives it to his wife after they''re married? ANSWERS: 1. (talk) 2. (legs) 3. (a twenty dollar bill) 4. (firetruck) 5. (fork) 6. (Almond Joy candy bar) 7. (last name)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s So stupid she put yellow for the answer to the following question: What color is Santa''s red suit?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re about as useful as a bargain hunter in Sears!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die from natural causes. 2. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The FBI and the DEA are joining efforts and will be assigning some of their agents to a quasi-FBI/DEA enforcement team specifically targeting the illegal allergy pills sales that occur on the black market. The agents will be called "Pseudo Feds."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she shoved a battery up her butt and yelled I''ve got the power', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a black owl and a white owl? A: White owl: Who who Black owl: Who that who that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a blond, a red head, and a brunette. They had to tell a joke in order not to go to hell. So the red head goes first: "What do you call a boy going to jail? A Micheal Jackson lover." (not that funny) So she goes to hell. Then the burnette says: "What''s the difference between your mama and the blond''s mama? The blond''s has a bigger chance on giving it up and yours doesn''t need any." (not that funny either) So, she goes to hell as well. Finally, the blond says: "Knock-knock! Who''s there? God God who? Godzilla!" (not that funny) But, the blond gets in! Why? Because, she used God and didn''t notice it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why was Raggedy Anne kicked out of the toypen? A: Because she kept sitting on Pinnochio''s face saying, "Lie to me, lie to me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife are in the bed watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?" He turns to her and says, "Do you want to have sex?" "No," she answered. He replies, "Is that your final answer?" "Yes," she said. He then replies, "I''d like to phone a friend." That''s the last thing he remembers. . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s 50 cents call someone who cares', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you can tell time... Why can''t you tell that I don''t have time for you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever wonder why your ears are where they are? Just think, if they were on your butt, you would have to pull down your pants to hear what I''m saying --REDD FOXX', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a girl named Ann Hyser Who claimed that no man could surprise her. But old Pabst made a push at the Schlitz in her Busch and now she is sadder Budweiser! *This joke was made by Bill Klompus* Go Bill!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a stupid boy named Max. His dad wanted to see what he would do if he gave him a dollar, so Max''s dad gave him a dollar the next day. Max was so excited. As he walked to school that day, the dollar in his hand, a little girl came up to him and said, "I will give you 2 shiny quarters for that dollar." Max figured that 2 was better than 1, so he willingly traded. When Max reached the school, a little boy came up to him and said, "I''ll give you 3 dimes for those 2 quarters." Max traded again. Then his teacher came up to him, and knowing that he was so dumb, asked him to trade his 3 dimes for 4 nickels. Again, he traded. As Max was walking home from school that day, a old man came up to him and said, "Will you trade those 4 nickels for these 5 pennies?" Max traded. When Max got home, his dad asked his where his money was. Max showed him and Max never got money again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did our founding fathers expressed equality, but the constitution says people born in other countries can''t be president?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please tell me how to obey these signs: All Night Dance Club; NO MUSIC ALLOWED Public Stairway; Please do not climb on stairs Country Road; NO PEDESTRIANS OR AUTOMOBILES A room in a touch-an-feel musem; Do not touch A seminar for the deaf; Please listen to others Local bookstore; Feel free to read books in this section, however do not read them in this store A local carpet store completely covered in rugs; Come in! Please do not step on rugs And please tell me who wrote these signs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the 60''s, people took acid to make the world appear weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when a dinosuar stubs its toe? A: Stubasaurus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This above a uranal. What are you looking at? The real joke is in your hands!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('General Ways to Annoy People Announce when you''re going to the bathroom. Ask people to prove everything they say. (e.g. "I''m Bob, nice to meet you..." "PROVE IT!") ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE. Before exiting the elevator, push all the buttons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How To Annoy People In An Elevator: Ask, "Did you hear that cable snapping sound?" Call the psychic hotline from you cell phone, and ask if they know what floor you''re on. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That''s mine!" Hum the theme from Mission Impossible with yours eyes darting around the elevator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ways To Annnoy Your Roommate Become a mime. Nothing is more annoying than a mime. Ask your roommate if your family can move in "just for a couple of weeks." Buy some turtles. Paint numbers on their backs. Race them down the hall. Chain yourself to your roommate''s bed. Get him/her to bring you food.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ways To Annoy People In The Computer Lab Bring some dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking. Light candles in a circle around your terminal before starting. Play "Pong" for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab. Try to stick a Nintendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disc drive, when it doesn''t work, get the supervisor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ways To Annoy People On The Subway Stand in front of the doorway and glare at people when they try to get by. Constantly ask people for directions. Don''t take a shower for a month. Tell the people your problems. They really want to know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many rich people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They hire people to do it for them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond and a red-head were planning to go to an amusement park. When they got to the park the blond asks, "who will pay, You or me?". So the red-head says, "I''ll tell you what, you''ll pay for entrance, and I''ll pay for all the rides." (The rides don''t cost anything at all!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a small jokester called Joey, who was visting at his Grandpa''s. Now Grandpa was rather short of temper, so after Joey had been standing in the doorway for 5 minutes, trying to decide whether or not to go outside, he said, ''''Hurry up, now will you?'''' Joey turned around and frowned. ''''Keep your hair on,'''' he grumbled. Seeing Grandpa''s bald head, he giggled, ''''Opps! To late!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a slave market, an owner is showing his slaves for selling. A man come to the shop and pointing to an American slave and asked, "how much he is?". The owner said, "$100". And the man pioint to a Russian slave, asked again, and the owner reply, "$1000". The man point to Japanese slave, and the owner reply , "$10000". Finally the man point to a African slave and ask the price, the owner reply, "$100000". The customer is confused and ask, "Why that black slave cost too much?". The owner reply, "His brain is still new, he never used his brain". ----------------------------------- I don''t mean to make someone feel bad. Coz i am a afro-american :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are you laughing at? Your mom is a hooker!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feet does a black rooster have? How many wings does a black rooster have? How many heads does a black rooster have? How many hairs are on the back of a white cat? Why is it that you know more about a black cock rather than a white pussy?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call a blond, redneck lawyer? A. Yo Momma!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best things in life are free and the worst things in life cost only $19.95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat that when she has sex she has show directions!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bobby-Hey do you remember what the teacher said in fourth hour? Jessica-?--------??? Bobby-Did you just have a blonde moment?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I have this great knock knock joke for you! Knock Knock Who''s there? Hello? Hello who? Hello? Hello who!!? Oh Hi? Hey, I have this great knock knock joke for you! Okay knock knock. Who''s there? Hello? Who''s there!!!!!!?? The door slams. Knock knock. Ding Dong. Fine. Hello? Hello? Hello!!!? *peacecylone*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a very busy high way there stood three images. Santa, The easter bunny and a smart mexican. Well who crossed the street first? None There is no such thing as santa, the easter bunny, or a smart mexican.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s missing? ch_ _ ch U R you are', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a robot''s favorite food? Nuts and bolts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Where does a fish like to sleep? A. In a river bed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Where do Comedians go if they are sick? A. To the He-He-Mergency room!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why was the Gum so mad in class? A. It was Chewed Out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a computer? A. A lot of Bytes!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why was the piano locked out? A. Because he had no keys!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Who likes to make dinner for Peter Pan? A. Captain Cook!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call a cow that gives chocolate milk? A. An Utter Delight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man scolded his son for being so unruly and the child rebelled against his father. He got some of his clothes, his teddy bear and his piggy bank and proudly announced, "I''m running away from home!" The father calmly decided to look at the matter logically. "What if you get hungry?" he said. "Then I''ll come home and eat!" bravely declared the child. "And what if you run out of money?" "I will come home and get some!" readily replied the child. The man then made a final attempt, "What if your clothes get dirty?" "Then I''ll come home and let mommy wash them," was the reply. The man shook his head and exclaimed, "This kid is not running away from home, he''s going off to college!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the Human Torch get married? He couldn''t find his Match!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a stupid garbage can? A Dumb-ster!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the director say after making the Mummy Movie? "It''s a Wrap!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What always stays hot inside a refridgerator? A. Salsa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Colter was explaining that there were rules for voting in the United States. "You have to be at least eighteen, you have to be a citizen, and-" John blurts out, "And you can''t vote for democrats!"* * All credit for this goes to John Rieger, who wouldn''t shut up during sixth period.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My little sister recently asked me: "Why does the conductor of the band always wave his magic wand, but the players never disappear?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No, of course it isn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GEORGE W. BUSH PRESIDENTIAL LIBRARY DESTROYED BY FLOOD Crawford, Texas (AP) A tragic flood this morning destroyed the personal library of President George W. Bush. The flood began in the presidential bathroom where the books were kept. Both books have been lost. A presidential spokesman said the president was devastated, as he had almost finished coloring the second one. The White House tried to call FEMA but there was no answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What little girl takes from the rich and gives to the poor? A. Little Red Robbin'' Hood!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama is so fat because your mama''s mama passed down genes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat you turn the world upside down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest and a rabbi are sitting in a park talking. A young boy walks by, the priest says "Hey, you want to screw him?" and the rabbi says "Out of what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had just got to his hotel room with his newlywed wife on thier honeymoon. He said, "Let''s screw." So they took off their clothes and got close and started kissing and the man said, "Wait, we don''t have a condom, I''m not ready for kids yet." So the man called up the bellhop and asked him to bring up a condom. When the bellhop got their he said, "Here is your condom sir, would you like me to put it on your bill?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy an indian and a muslim were in an airport waiting for their flight. After some silence the indian says. "Once my people were many, now we are few." Then the muslim says, "My people were many, we are still many," he turns to the cowboy, "Why do you think that is?" The cowboy says, "Maybe that''s ''cause we haven''t played cowboys ''n'' muslims yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into her accountant''s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says: "Before we begin, I''ll need to ask you a few questions." He gets her name, address, social security number, etc, and then asks, "what is your occupation?" "I''m a whore," she says. The accountant balks and says, "No, No, No, that won''t work. That is too gross. Let''s try to rephrase that." The woman says, "OK, I''m a high-end call girl." "No, that is still too crude. Try again." They both think for a minute, then the woman says, "I''m an elite chicken farmer." The accountant asks, "What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore & call girl? "Well, I raised over a thousand little peckers last year." He replies: "Good enough."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you plant dope? Bury a blond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond was stuck on an island. She could not get off, but there was an interesting structure on the island that intrigued her. It was a building with a small hole running through the bottom of it, and a bit away from it was a small hole, about five inches in diameter. She realized that there was no food on the island. She was stuck there for two days when the intendent came out and said, "Ma''am, the pedestrians here would appreciate it if you would get off of the Western Golf Course for awhile."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she sneezed and caused a hurricane!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother explained to her daughter, "We didn''t have TVs not to long time ago, sweetie." She looks at her mother strangely and asks, "Then how did they play their VCR''s?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor who had been seeing an 80-year-old woman for most of her life finally retired. At her next checkup, the new doctor asked her to bring a list of all the medicines that had been prescribed for her. As the young doctor was looking through these, his eyes grew wide as he realized she had a prescription for birth control pills. "Mrs. Smith, do you realize these are BIRTH CONTROL pills?" "Yes, they help me sleep at night." "Mrs. Smith, I assure you there is absolutely NOTHING in these that could possibly help you sleep!" She reached out and patted the young Doctor''s knee. "Yes, dear, I know that. But every morning, I grind one up and mix it in the glass of orange juice that my 18 year old granddaughter drinks; believe me, it helps me sleep at night!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. knock knock, who''s there? Ima, Ima who? Ima hungry can we eat yet? 2. knock knock, who''s there? peas, peas who? peas can we start know 3. knock knock, who''s there? phil, phil who? phil my cup up with water please', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harvey''s grandfather clock suddenly stops working right one day, so he loads it into his van and takes it to a clock repair shop. In the shop is a little old man who insists he is Swiss, and has a heavy German accent. He asks Harvey, "Vat sims to be ze problem?" Harvey says, "I''m not sure, but it doesn''t go ''tick-tocktick -tock'' anymore. Now it just goes ''tick...tick...tick.''" The old man says, "Mmm-Hm!" and steps behind the counter, where he rummages around a bit. He emerges with a huge flashlight and walks over the grandfather clock. He turns the flashlight on, and shines it directly into the clocks face. Then he says in a menacing voice, "Ve haf vays of making you tock!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('rudeness - someone who keeps talking while your are trying to interrupt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, please hurry. My son swallowed a razor blade. "Don''t panic, I''m coming immediately. Have you done anything yet?" "Yeah, I shaved with the electric razor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile"? JOHN: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L." TEACHER: No, that''s wrong. JOHN: Maybe it''s wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark? FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write? SYLVIA: Your name on this report card.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Of course you know they have changed the look of twenty dollar bills recently. What happens to the old ones? Bill Gates gets them!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pinocchio had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters when they were having sex. Pinocchio, therefore, went to visit Gepetto to see if he could help. Gepetto suggested he try a little sandpaper wherever indicated and Pinocchio skipped away enlightened. A couple of weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing happily through town and asked him, "How''s the girlfriend?" Pinocchio replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From a brunette''s point of view: Blondes may have more fun but hey, at least we can read!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to know a dirty joke? A white horse falls into a mud puddle. Wanna know a clean joke? The horse takes a shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the letters "INRI" at the top of Jesus'' cross stand for? I''m Nailed Right In.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus sees a woman being assaulted by an angry crowd and steps in front of her and says, "let he who hath no sin cast the first stone." From the crowd comes a rock flying at the woman. Jesus looks over and says, "Damn it mother, sometimes you really piss me off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer is going down the road with his horse pulling his wagon and his dog lying next to ''em. The farmer says, "It sure is hot out here." The horse turns back and says, "It sure is." The farmer says, "I didn''t know horses could talk." The dog said, "Neither did I."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was smoking a cigarette. Another guy comes up to him and asks, "Do you have an extra cigarette?" The first guy looks at the box and reads that it contains 20 cigarettes. He counts all the cigarettes in his box and says,"Nope, don''t got any extra cigarettes".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Yo Momma? Yo Momma doesn''t know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Over 75% of the jokes submitted to this site are duplicates. Please search the website before submitting a joke to make sure yours it is not already listed. Before submitting your joke, please check it for spelling and grammatical errors because you will not be able to correct them later. If this is your first time submitting a joke, please review the Style Guidelines. Most importantly, do not use copyrighted jokes without the permission of the author.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is laziness!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys decided to go buy two pigs. So after they bought them they wanted to know which one was who''s. So they went to the barn but when they got there the two pigs were fighting. After they broke them up one pig was missing a ear. So one guy said, "What are we going to do now?" So after they thought about it for a while they went back to the barn. When they got there the pigs were fighting again. After they broke them up one pig was missing a tail. So the guy said, ''''What now?'''' After they thought about it for a while they went back to the barn. The pigs were fighting again. After they broke them up one pig was missing a leg. So the guy said, ''''What now?'''' The other guy said, "FUCK IT! I get the white one and you get the black one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was screaming into his phone saying "Can you hear me now?". Annoyed, a CIA offical said "Yes, we can hear you now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To save a tree remove a Bush.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a woman with one black eye? A fast learner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the end of the world arrives how will the media report it? USA Today: WE''RE DEAD The Wall Street Journal: DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS National Enquirer: O.J. AND NICOLE, TOGETHER AGAIN Microsoft Systems Journal: APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE Victoria''s Secret Catalog: OUR FINAL SALE Sports Illustrated: GAME OVER Wired: THE LAST NEW THING Rolling Stone: THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR Readers Digest: ''BYE Discover Magazine: HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS? Lady''s Home Journal: LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET! America Online: SYSTEM TEMPORARILY DOWN. TRY CALLING BACK IN 15 MINUTES. Inc. magazine: TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE TIME magazine: RENEW YOUR SUBSCRIPTION FOR ETERNITY', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A crab and an ant lost their homes. The crab says to the ant, "I''m going to find us a place to sleep tonight." They''re walking and the crab sees a naked lady walking towards them. "Hey, ant. You see that lady? We''re going to crawl up to her bush and go to sleep there tonight." Once up there, the crab say''s to the ant, "You see that door? You go up there and sleep tonight and I''ll sleep in her bush." That night when they were asleep the lady had a guy friend come over and they had sex. That morning the ant say to the crab, "How did you sleep, Crab?" The crab says, "Great. How did you sleep, Ant?" "Well," the ant says "in that door you sent me at about two o''clock in the morning, someone stuck there fist in there and beat my ass. After that, they spit on me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she ties her shoes with spahgetti so she can eat and run.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your are in Alaska when you go to court and they ask you where you were on the night of October to April!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so bald, I can read her mind', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can a mane date the sister of his widow? No, because you can''t date when you are dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Person #1: "Want to hear a joke?" Person #2: "Sure." Person #1: "Your face." ~ Your momma is so fat, she is overweight. ~ Two turds were hanging out. The first one was moaning and groaning. The second one asked, "What''s wrong?" The first one replied, "I feel like crap."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, there was a blonde who called her boyfriend and said, "Baby, I''m working on this puzzle and it''s really hard. Can you come and help me?" He asked what it looked like and she replied saying that there was a tiger on the box. The boyfriend was convinced to come over and help. She welcomed him at the door and showed him the mess of pieces on her coffee table. After observing the peices, the boyfriend said, "Okay, sweetie, let''s sit down, relax, have some coffee, then can we please put the frosted flakes back in the box?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('D.A.R.E. sadly doesn''t stand for Drugs Are Really Excellent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she asked to buy a vowel on Wheel of Fortune and said "S"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- You''re so stupid, you got locked inside a grocery store and starved to death! - You''re so big, you play pool with the planets! - You''re so fat, when you went outside in yellow clothes, someone screamed, "TAXI!" - You''re so big, when you go to the movies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge frowns at the criminal report of the man he is judging. He asks, "So you robbed the same store on three successive nights?" The robber replies, "Yes your honor." The judge, even more perplexed asks, "And why was that?" "Because my wife wanted a dress," says the robber. The judge checks with his records, "But it says here you broke in three nights in a row!" "Yes sir. She made me exchange it twice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of sneakers do chickens wear? Re-bok-bok-bok-bok-bok.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Smith: "So, Mr. Jones, how''s your son John?" Mr. Jones: "He''s at Harvard right now." Mr. Smith: "Oh, really?! Well, congratulations! What''s he studying?" Mr. Jones: "Oh, he''s not studying anything. They''re studying him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool and show who was boss on the aviation frequencies. So, this was his first time approaching a field during the nighttime. Instead of making any official requests to the tower, he said, "Guess who?" The controller switched the field lights off and replied, "Guess where!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one. 2. How many Candains does it take to change a lightbulb? One to whack it out with his hockey stick, and one to screw in the new one. 3. How many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb? One to screw it in, 2 to support him, and 1 to disagree with his lightbulb approach. 4. How many terrorists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1 to crash a plane into the lightbulb, and 1 to put in the new lightbulb. 5. How many soccer players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to take out the old one, one to attempt to kick it in to the socket, and one to buy new bulbs after the kicking attemts fail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was younger my father always told me to be more lady like and civil. I decided to teach him a lesson. When we arrived at his mothers house there were donuts on the table. We sat around and talked(and munched) I soon got up to excuse myself saying "I have to pee." Dad reminded me that there was a better way to put that. "I''m sorry" I said "I have to powder my nose like a racehorse."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you haven''t read this joke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Me DUHH!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? I don''t know, ask the chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blonde say to the red head? Nothing. She couldn''t remember what she was going to say!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so ugly, when you were born the doctors shoved you back in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one penny say to another penny? Let''s get together and make cents', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but it takes a certified electrician to make it work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are so small that on your ID picture, your feet showed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: You think the following is funny You haven''t read the joke "You are a Redneck If... #900".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat if they named a hurricane after her it would have to be a category 20.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas so stupid she asked how much she had to pay to get a free car-wash.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mommas so stupid, she brought a TV remote to the movie theater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so dirty, she went in for a shower and lost weight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are sitting next to a dead guy. The first one can only say, "Yup! Yup! Yup!" The second one can say, "Forks and Knives. Forks and knives." Finally, the third one can say, "Goddie, goodie gumdrops! Goodie, goodie gumdrops!" A cop comes by and asks the first one if he killed the man. Unable to say anything else, he says, "Yup! Yup! Yup!" Then he asks the second man, "What weapons did you use?" The second man says, "Forks and Knives. Forks and knives." Astonished, he is taken back for a second and then tells them all that they will go to jail. The third man tries to plead, "Goddie, goodie gumdrops! Goodie, goodie gumdrops!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a joke to do to a very gullible person. You start off by telling that person to say "Just like me", whenever you say something. You then start: "I went to my house" Just like me. "And walked through the door" just like me "and up the stairs" just like me "and then I walked down the hall" just like me "and opened the door to my room" just like me " And then I heard a noise" just like me " and I looked out my window" just like me "And saw a monkey that looked" just like me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is playing poker, and sees a sign that says: If You Have A Gambling Problem call 1-800-GAMBLING. So the man calls the hotline and says, "The guy on my right has an ace and a two, I have a three and a jack, there is a four, a five, and a queen on the table, what should I do?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Gain weight. At least 30 pounds. 2. Stop exercising. Waste of time. 3. Read less. Makes you think. 4. Watch more TV. You''ve been missing some good stuff. 5. Procrastinate more. Starting tomorrow. 6. Stop bringing lunch from home: Eat out more. 7. Get in a whole NEW rut! 8. Spend your summer vacation in Cyberspace. 9. Don''t eat cloned meat. 10. Create loose ends. 11. Get more toys. 12. Get further in debt. 13. Don''t believe politicians. 14. Break at least one traffic law. 15. Avoid airplanes that spontaneously drop 1000 feet. 16. Don''t swim with piranhas or sharks. 17. Associate with even worse business clients. 18. Spread out priorities beyond ability to keep track of them. 19. Wait around for opportunity. 20. Focus on the faults of others. 21. Mope about faults. 22. Never make New Year''s resolutions again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so nasty that she can help stop air pollution by not breathing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If he concentrates on the bottle because it says, "from concentrate!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A son and a father are walking together in a sunday morning, chatting. They enter a park and pass by a big, fat man, on a bench, drooling in his sleep (with his mouth open) and a bag of potato chips on his lap. As they pass by him the son snickers, while the father sighs. They continue walking talking about many things. Eventually, a hot woman in a red dress passes by, the son looks at her with eyes of passion. The father looks at her too. "Son, don''t be fooled by a woman''s good looks" the son looks at his father, ready for a lesson. "That''s your mom 20 years ago" then he sighs. "That''s your mom now", he says as he looks at the man on the bench.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thank you for using Wocka.com. This page states the terms and conditions under which you may use the web site. It is important that you read this page carefully because by opening our web site you agree to be bound, without limitation or qualification, by these terms. If you do not accept any of the terms stated here then do not use the web site. This web site may, in its sole discretion, modify or revise these terms at any time by updating this web page. You are bound by any such modification or revision and should therefore visit this page periodically to review the terms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Use of our web site is at all times "at your own risk." If you are dissatisfied with any of the materials, other contents of the web site, any of these terms and conditions, the web site''s privacy policy, or any other policies, your only remedy is to discontinue use of our web site. In no event shall the web site, or its suppliers, be liable to any user or third party, for any damages whatsoever resulting from the use or inability to use the web site or the material on that site, whether based on warranty, contract, tort, or any other legal theory, and whether or not the web site is advised of the possibility of such damages.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you would like to link your web site to Wocka.com, please freely bookmark or add links to any page contained within this web site provided that this site does not appear inside any frames.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wocka.com and material therein are provided without warranties of any kind, whether express or implied. The web site, to the fullest extent permitted by law, disclaim all warranties, including but not limited to warranties of title, fitness for a particular purpose, merchantability and non-infringement of proprietary or third party rights. The web site makes no warranties about the accuracy or reliability of the material, services, text, graphics, and/or links. The web site does not warrant that the web site will operate error-free or that this web site or its server are free of computer viruses or other harmful items. If your use of our web site or the material on this site results in the need for servicing or replacing equipment or data, the web site is not responsible for those costs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At its discretion, this site may remove any material posted on our web site that infringes on the rights of others. If you believe that your work has been used improperly or your copyrights have been violated we encourage you to contact us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our web site contains links to third party web sites that are maintained by others. These links are provided solely as a convenience to you and not as an endorsement by the web site of the contents on these third-party web sites. The web site is not responsible for the content of linked third-party sites and does not make any representations regarding the content or accuracy of materials on such third-party web sites. If you decide to access linked third-party web sites, you do so at your own risk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our website contains links to other websites that are created and maintained by us. When visiting one of these sites, our privacy policy and terms of use remain the same. No information of any kind is shared between these sites. These sites are: Braingle.com - User submitted and ranked jokes. PuzzleSolver.com - Solutions to many popular puzzles. DuckRocket.com - Easy, Fast Email GeoSnapper.com - Enables users to upload and distribute accurately geo-referenced digital photographs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This site logs the IP addresses and types of browser used by its guests. This information is used to monitor and make improvements to the site. This site does not secretly collect any personally identifiable information. User''s may choose to become a registered user, in which case they may choose to reveal information about themselves such as their email address. This information will never be shared or sold. Users may remove themselves and their information from the web site''s database by contacting us. This website and the advertisers on this website conform to the Children''s Online Privacy Protection Act', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cookie is a piece of data stored on the user''s hard drive. This site uses cookies to maintain state between pages on this site. The user may remove these cookies at any time by logging out of the web site. Advertisers on this site may use cookies. However, we have no access to or control over these cookies. The ads on this website are provided by Burstmedia. You may read their Privacy Policy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We use IP addresses and browser type to analyze trends and administer the site. We do not do reverse DNS lookups, so IP addresses are not linked to personally identifiable information.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We may share aggregated information with our partners and advertisers. This is not linked to any personally identifiable information.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This web site contains links to other sites. Please be aware that we are not responsible for the privacy practices of such other sites. We encourage our users to be aware when they leave our site and to read the privacy statements of each and every web site that collects personally identifiable information. This privacy statement applies solely to information collected by this Web site.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From time-to-time our site requests information from users via surveys. Participation in these surveys or contests is completely voluntary and the user therefore has a choice whether or not to disclose this information. Information requested may include contact information (such as name and shipping address), and demographic information (such as zip code, age level). Survey information will be used for purposes of monitoring or improving the use and satisfaction of this site.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This website takes every precaution to protect our users'' information. When users submit sensitive information via the website, your information is protected both online and off-line. If you have any questions about the security at our website, you can contact us.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If we decide to change our privacy policy, we will post those changes on this page so our users are always aware of what information we collect, how we use it, and under what circumstances, if any, we disclose it. We will always use information in accordance with the privacy policy under which the information was collected.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We rated with RSAC i, TM Safe Surf Rated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please submit any comments you have using this form: Your Email Address: Message: Send Feedback', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me these songs about Barney. I hope you like them. (In rhythm to I Love You) I hate you You hate me We''re a violent family With a great big gun and a bang from me to you Won''t you say you hate me too. (In rhythm to Joy To The World) Joy to the world Barney''s dead I barbequed his head What happened to his body I flushed it down the potty And around and around it goes And around and around it And around and around around around it goes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamas so dumb she put a quarter in a parking meter and said "Hey! Wheres my gumball?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.What did one sheep call the other sheep who stole his food? A. a ba-a-astard', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your baby stroller consists of a potato sack and a wheelbarrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so scary, she killed Freddy Krouger in his own dreams.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An ant and an elephant got married. After they had sex, the elephant had a heart attack and died. "Crap," the ant said. "Five minutes of passion and now the rest of my life digging a grave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid, when I told her to turn on the tv, she started stripping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What disease frightens ghosts the most? BoOoOo-bonic Plague What''s the difference between girl ghosts and boy ghosts? BoOoOo-bies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the blonde make the gymnastics team? When they asked for a cartwheel, she stole a tire from the hot dog vendor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the blonde college student doing at the harbor? Looking for an internship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We have all wished for something, but think about this: Hold out your hands, wish in one, and crap in the other. Which hand do you think will get filled up first?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q> Why did Pepsi hire Michael Jackson to do commercials again? A> Because they wanted someone to suck that little boy back out of the bottle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How does a redneck take a bubble bath? A: He farts in a puddle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do women fake orgasms? A. Because they think men care!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('% cat "food in cans" cat: can''t open food in cans % nice man woman No manual entry for woman. % rm God rm: God nonexistent % ar t God ar: God does not exist] % ar r God ar: creating God % "How would you rate Quayle''s incompetence? Unmatched ". % [Where is Jimmy Hoffa? Missing ]. % ^How did the sex change operation go? ^ Modifier failed. % If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have? Too many (''s. % make love Make: Don''t know how to make love. Stop. > % sleep with me bad character % got a light? No match. % man: why did you get a divorce? man:: Too many arguments. % !:say, what is saccharine? Bad substitute. % %blow %blow: No such job. The following are not csh but sh : $ PATH=pretending!/usr/ucb/which sense no sense in pretending! $ drink <bottle; opener bottle: cannot open opener: not found', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are walking along the sidewalk, and the brunette says she is dying of thirst and wants Dr. Pepper. The blonde runs across town into the nearest hospital and asks the receptionist for Dr. Pepper. The receptionist says OK, and hands her a bottle of soda. The blonde says, "What do you think this is? A Joke? My friend is dying and needs to see Dr. Pepper right away!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are scissors such good dancers? A: Because of their sharp moves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock Who''s there? Did you ever hear the joke about the broken pencil? Did you ever hear the joke about the broken pencil who? Nevermind, it''s pointless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a recent PETA meeting, some members were discussing people they had seen wearing fur coats. Joan, a redhead, said, "Yesterday I saw a man wearing a fur coat and I wanted to yell at him about the cruelness of that coat!" Jack, a brown haired man, said, "I saw a woman wearing a fur coat three days ago and I almost launched into a lecture about animal treatment! If only people wouldn''t do such things." Jan, a blond, said, "You wouldn''t believe what I saw on my way here! A girl, dressed in fur from head to foot! It was unbelievable! I would''ve talked to her about cruelty to animals, but I was in the car. You wouldn''t guess what she looked like." "What?" Joan and Jack said in unison. Jan said, "A golden retriever!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you seen the lottery tickets from India? If the spot on your ticket matches the spot on your forehead, you win a 7-11 store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A customer (a middle-aged woman) arrived to have a massage from among the fifteen or so blind masseurs. She came with a side-kick who brought along her things from the office. Approaching the line of masseurs waiting for customers, Lady - in a voice quite loud as to be overheard "They are good masseurs these blind people, huh?" Sidekick - "Yes, ma''am" Lady - "But I heard that the blind who are nearly deaf are the best because they can concentrate more on what they are doing." Just then a masseur interjected - "Excuse me, ma''am your voice sounds familiar - Do I know you?" Lady - "No, I don''t think so," then excitedly louder, "It is my first time to come here!" Masseur - "You are correct, ma''am. My name is Homer! How nice of you to remember!" The lady signalled a thumbs up to her side-kick. Then said "I''ll have my massage here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Parent: You two should sing in the talent show together. Tim: When pigs fly! cindy: You fly?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q> What kind of soup do gay Chinese men like? A> Cream of sum yun guy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only thing truly free of charge is a dead battery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s credit is so bad,,, The bank wants the their calendar back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy has lived to an extremely old age, and one day his grandson asked him to what he attributes his long life. "Well, you know that every morning, I have a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast," says the old timer. His grandson nods. "Before I eat it, I sprinkle a little gunpowder on it, every day," The ancient cowpoke adds. The grandson decides to follow his grandfather''s breakfast regimen, and each morning of his life, he has oatmeal with gunpowder sprinkled on it. Sure enough, the grandson lives to the ripe old age of 97, and when he died, he left seven children, twenty one grandchildren, eighteen great-grandchildren, and a fifteen foot hole in the side of the crematorium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were sitting in the living room and he said to her, "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle? If that ever happens, just pull the plug." His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all of his beer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What can a picnic table do that a musician can''t do? Support a family of six!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The child was a typical four-year-old girl - cute, inquisitive, and bright as a new penny. When she expressed difficulty in grasping the concept of marriage, her father decided to pull out his wedding photo album, thinking visual images would help. One page after another, he pointed out the bride arriving at the church, the entrance, the wedding ceremony, the recessional, the reception, etc. "Now do you understand?" he asked. "I think so," she said, "is that when mommy came to work for us?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was bragging about his sister who disguised herself as a man and joined the Army. "But wait a minute," said the listener, "She''ll have to dress with the boys and shower with them too, won''t she?" "Sure," replied the man. "Well? Won''t they find out?" "And who''s gonna tell?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Lazy Bowl Reclining toilet: It''s plush while you flush!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Jack helped you off your horse, later would you return the favor and help Jack off his horse?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day someone knocks on a blonde''s door. She asks: "Who is it?" and the person answers: "It''s me!" Then the blonde wonders, "Me?!?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: May I hold your hand? Girl: It isn''t very heavy. I think I can carry it myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You want me to write a joke!?!? The world is being attacked by aliens! AWWWWW! A warning; they have huge, hairy jaws and beady little eyes and long mangy hair and a huge nose and foul breath and and... oops. That''s just you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three senators were sitting at the bar and having drinks with each other. The democrat started a conversation of were they liked their wives to be positioned during sex, the democrat said that he likes his wife on top, so he can see all of her. The republican said, "No no no I like my wife on the bottom, she needs to know who the one with the control and dominance is." The independent blurted out, "I prefer my wife out of town."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to install a wireless security system: Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men''s used work boots, a really big pair. Put them outside your front door on top of a copy of Guns and Ammo magazine. Put a dog dish beside it, a really big dish. Leave a note on your front door that says something like, "Bubba, Big Mike and I have gone to get more ammunition - back in 1/2 an hr. Don''t disturb the pit bulls. They''ve just been wormed and they are a little edgy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After living in the remote wilderness of Kentucky all his life, an old hillbilly decided it was time to visit the big city. In one of the stores he picks up a mirror and looks in it. Not ever having seen one before, he remarked at the image staring back at him, "How about that! Here''s a picture of my daddy." He bought the ''picture'', but on the way home he remembered his wife, Lizzy, didn''t like his father. So he hung it in the barn, and every morning before leaving for the fields, he would go there and look at it. Lizzy began to get suspicious of these many trips to the barn. One day after her husband left, she searched the barn and found the mirror. As she looked into the glass, she fumed, "So that''s the ugly bitch he''s runnin'' around with."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asked her students to use the word ''fascinate'' in a sentence. Mary said, "My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating." The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted the word ''fascinate''." Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated." The teacher said, "Good, but I wanted the word ''fascinate''." Little Johnny Siebert raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was noted for his bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word ''fascinate'' so she called on him. Johnny said, "My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the elephant doing on the highway? About 5 mph', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the cannibal who was expelled from school? He was caught buttering up his teacher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics. The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist." Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled in furious fashion. Some students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the existence of the chair. One member of the class however, was up and finished in less than a minute. Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered how he could have gotten an A when he had barely written anything at all. His answer consisted of two words: "What chair?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when she put on a red sweater and went outside all the kids said "Kool-aid man!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl walks into a bar and sits down with her friend. She is feeling down, so she talks to her friend. Her friend says "Go get a beer." She says she didn''t want one. Then the friend says "Hey, who said it was for you?" copyright fox corp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so ugly, she looks like your dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ryan''s teeth were so yellow that when he walked outside, the sun said give me my butter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma was so fat that when she went to do her daily running, her body was moving but she wasn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was watching Beauty and the Geek the other day, and felt like submitting this joke (as it''s somewhat similar to something that happened in the show). A blonde is in school, and her teacher is having a random discussion about IQs. Teacher: "So what would you say your IQ is?" she asks a student Kid #1: "I don''t know.. I think it''s just the regular 100." Teacher: "He, he, alright, you?" she asks another student. Kid #2: "Umm... well... I took a test and it''s 118." Teacher: "Ah, you''re pretty smart, then." The teacher then realizes that someone is not paying attention. Teacher: "What IQ do you think you have, young lady?" The blonde jolts up a little due to the surprise. Blonde: "My IQ?" Teacher: "Yes." The blonde then grins arrogantly, "Heh, my IQ is, I would say, probably like an A right now... what is that? Like a 4.0?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so old, I slapped her back and her tits fell off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma''s so fat, she uses a matress as a tampon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do they put underwear on corpses? Why do people say "The alarm just went off" when really it just came on? If a vampire were Jewish would his Sabbath start at sunrise? Why do child labor laws not prohibit children from acting in movies? If your eyes are crossed, do your tears fall straight? If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense? Is the vice president''s wife called the second lady? Do you wake up or open your eyes first? Can you "zone out" and be "in the zone" at the same time? If French kissing is a big thing in America, how do French people react to normal American kissing? Why is it called a soap opera when nobody sings?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have I ever told you about my uncle Jeffy? Well, as a kid my uncle Jeffy lost all of his hair, and everyone thought he was sick, so he went to a doctor. The doctor told him "Jeffy, you are not sick." He was right because, later in life, Jeffy was in school and walked through a wall! It turned out Jeffy had magical powers! He then got a pet dragon and learned how to fly. We go visit Uncle Jeffy at the Mental Institution every 1st of the month.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy went to the bathroom at school, but when he went to wipe his bum, there was no toilet paper so he used his hands. When he got back to class, his teacher asked him what he had in his hands. "A little leprechaun and if I open my hand he''ll get scared away," the boy said. He was then sent to the principal''s office and the principal asked him what he had in his hands. "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he''ll get scared away." He was sent home and his mom asked him what he had in his hands. "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he''ll get scared away." He was sent to his room and his dad came in and asked him what he had in his hands. "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he''ll get scared away." Then his Dad got really mad and yelled, "Open your hands!" "Look, Dad. You scared the crap out of him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A class is on a field trip to the zoo. They are in the farm animal''s section, and all of the sudden the entire class looks to their right and see 2 pigs going at it like it was the last day on Earth. Boy: o.o umm... teacher, what are those pigs doing? Teacher: O.O I don''t think those are pigs...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes, I get so sleepy that I fall asleep at my keyboa-----hogasvfbhjhfaokL;''GRUHIKMUIHGDFJSJIKkljhvLD ;YWEHKJF,HCsssljga lrsaio.ra;ugsrol,.k,ijhekng0ljr', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn''t find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, "Great, so now you''re cheating on me with a bald woman!" The next night, when she didn''t smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, "She''s not only bald, but she''s too cheap to buy any perfume!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After his recent stay in the hospital, Pa was particularly irritable, especially regarding food. At a nearby restaurant he stopped for a quick meal and the waiter provided a bowl of soup. As the waiter turned away to return to the kitchen Pa stopped him, calling: "Waiter!" "Yes, sir, is there something wrong?" "The soup. Taste it," replied Pa. "I beg your pardon, sir?" "Taste it." "But, sir, I can assure you that the soup is excellent." "Taste it," Pa persisted. "Sir, the soup was made this morning of the finest ingredients." "Taste it!" The exasperated waiter finally relented. "All right, sir, I''ll taste it." Then after a pause he said, "Where is the spoon?" To which Pa replied triumphantly, "Ah ha ... "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new Librarian decided that instead of checking out children''s books by writing the names of borrowers on the book cards herself, she would have the youngsters sign their own names. She would then tell them they were signing a "Contract" for returning the books on time. Her first customer was a second grader, who looked surprised to see a new Librarian. He brought four books to the desk and shoved them across to the Librarian, giving her his name as he did so. The Librarian pushed the books back and told him to sign them out. The boy laboriously printed his name on each book card and then handed them to her with a look of utter disgust. Before the Librarian could even start her speech he said, scornfully, "That other Librarian we had could write."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some men in a pickup truck drove to a lumber yard. One of the men walked into the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos." The clerk asked, "You mean two-by-fours, don''t you?" The man said, "I''ll go check," and went back to the truck. He returned shortly and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-four." "All right. How long do you need them?" The customer paused for a moment and said, "I''d better go check." After a while, he returned to the office and said, - "A long time. We''re gonna build a house..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An autopsy professor was giving an introductory lecture to a class of students. Standing over a corpse, he addressed the class. "There are two things you need to make a career in medical forensics. First, you must have no fear." Having said that, he shoved his finger up the corpse''s anus and licked it. "Now you must do the same," he told the class. After a couple of minutes of uneasy silence, the class did as instructed. "Second," the professor continued, "you must have an acute sense of observation. For instance, how many of you noticed that I put my middle finger up this man''s anus, but licked my index finger?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a holdup in Long Beach, California, would be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company, suspecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and lost a finger. The chef''s claim was approved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was traveling back to my hometown and, responding to Mother Nature, decided to stop at one of those rest areas on the side of the road. I went into the washroom. The first stall was taken, so I went into the second stall. I had just sat down when I heard a voice from the other stall. "Hi there, how is it going?" I am not the type to strike up conversations with strangers while sitting on the john in restrooms on the side of the road. I didn''t know what to do, but finally I said, "Not bad." Then the voice said, "So, what are you doing?" At this point, I was starting to find the situation a bit weird, but I said, "Well, I''m headed back east." Then I heard the person, all flustered, say, "Look, I''ll call you back. Every time I ask you a question, the idiot in the next stall keeps answering me!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The manager of a large office noticed one of his department heads had hired a new man, so the boss called him into his office for a little orientation speech. "What is your name?" he asked. "John," the new guy replied. The manager scowled, "Look, I don''t know what kind of place you worked at before, but I don''t call anyone by their first name. It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my employees by their last names only - Smith, Jones, Baker - that''s all. I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson. Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?" The new guy sighed and said, "Darling. John Darling." "Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When we moved cross-country, my wife and I decided to drive both of our cars. Nathan, our eight-year-old, worriedly asked, "How will we keep from getting separated?" "We''ll drive slowly so that one car can follow the other," I reassured him. "Yeah, but what if we DO get separated?" he persisted. "Well, then I guess we''ll never see each other again," I quipped. "Okay," he said. "I''m riding with Mom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sailor came home from a secret two year mission only to find his wife with a new born baby. Furious, he was determined to track down the father to extract revenge. "Was it my friend Sam?" he demanded. "No!" his weeping wife replied. "Was it my friend Jim then?" he asked. "NO!" she said even more upset. "Well, which one of my no-good friends did this then?" he asked. "Don''t you think I have any friends of my own?" she snapped.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tour guide was showing a tourist around Washington, D. C. The guide pointed out the place where George Washington supposedly threw a dollar across the Potomac River. "That''s impossible," said the tourist. "No one could throw a coin that far!" "You have to remember," answered the guide. "A dollar went a lot farther in those days."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John got off the elevator on the 50th floor and nervously knocked on his blind date''s door. She opened it and was as beautiful and charming as everyone had said. "I''ll be ready in a few minutes," she said. "Why don''t you play with Spot, my dog, while you''re waiting?" He does wonderful tricks. He rolls over, shakes hands, sits up and if you make a hoop with your arms, he''ll jump through." The dog followed John onto the balcony and started rolling over. John made a hoop with his arms and Spot jumped through--over the balcony railing. Just then John''s date walked out. "Isn''t Spot the cutest, happiest dog you''ve ever seen?" "To tell the truth, " he replied, "Spot seemed a little depressed to me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man''s life is difficult to understand, when born he struggles to get out of the vagina and then tries the rest of his life to get in!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man spotted a lamp by the roadside. He picked it up, rubbed it vigorously, and a genie appeared. "I''ll grant you your fondest wish," the genie said. The man thought for a moment, then said, "I want a spectacular job -- a job that no man has ever succeeded at or has ever even dared try." "Poof!" said the genie. "You''re a housewife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When our second child was on the way, my wife and I attended a pre-birth class aimed at couples who had already had at least one child. The instructor raised the issue of breaking the news to the older child. It went like this: "Some parents," she said, "tell the older child, ''We love you so much we decided to bring another child into this family.'' But think about that. Ladies, what if your husband came home one day and said, ''Honey, I love you so much I decided to bring home another wife.''" One of the women spoke up immediately. "Does she cook?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is lost in the desert. He used up the last of his water three days ago and he''s lying, gasping, on the sand, when in the distance he suddenly hears a voice calling "Mush! Mush!" Not trusting his ears he turns his head and there it is again, closer this time -- "Mush! Mush!" Propping himself up on one elbow he squints against the sun and sees, of all things, an Eskimo in a fur coat driving a sled with a team of huskies across the dunes. Thinking that it''s a hallucination, he blinks and shakes his head, but it''s for real! He painfully lifts one arm and in a cracked voice calls, "He-elp!" The Eskimo pulls the sled up by him, the huskies panting in the heat, and he says to the Eskimo, "I don''t know what you''re doing here, or why, but thank God you are! I''ve been wandering around this desert for days, my water''s all gone and I''m completely lost!" The perspiring Eskimo looks down at him and says, "You think YOU''RE lost!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d like the number for Christine Smith in Richmond, Virginia, the young man said to the 411 operator. "There are multiple listings for Christine Smith in Richmond, Virginia," the operator said. "Do you have a street name?" The young man hesitated a moment, "Well, uh, most people call me Snake."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 55-year-old man who was born on May 5, has been married 5 years, has 5 children, makes $55,555.55 a year, who''s lucky number is 5 receives a phone call from a friend. The friend informs the man that a horse named Lucky 5 will be running in the fifth race at the local track that evening. Excitedly, the man withdraws 5,555.00 cash from his bank account, goes to the races and bets on Lucky 5 to win. Sure enough, the horse comes in fifth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man, Mr. Goldstein, was living the last of his life in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed. Nurse Tracy asked if there was anything wrong. "Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Goldstein, "My private part died today, and I am very sad." Knowing her patients were forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, "Oh, I''m so sorry, Mr. Goldstein, please accept my condolences". The following day, Mr. Goldstein was walking down the hall with his private part hanging out of his pajamas, when he met Nurse Tracy. "Mr. Goldstein," she said, "you shouldn''t be walking down the hall like that. Please put your private part back inside your pajamas". "But, Nurse Tracy," replied Mr. Goldstein, "I told you yesterday that my private part died". "Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?" asked Nurse Tracy. "Well," he replied. "Today''s the viewing".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A really drunk guy is walking home from the bar and sees a pumpkin patch on the side of the road. He thinks how nice and squishy they must be on the inside, and decides to have a little fun with a pumpkin. He finds a big one, cuts a hole in it, and starts going at it. It must have been getting pretty good because he didn''t even notice that a cop car had pulled up, and that an officer was walking right towards him. The cop says "Hey buddy.... Do you know you''re screwing a pumpkin?" to which the guy responds, "A pumpkin?!? It''s midnight already???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. There is no "I" in "teamwork." But there is in "management kiss-up." 2. If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday. 3. The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts. 4. Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG 14 times gives you job security. 5. If you think we''re a bad company, you should see the competition. 6. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings. They did it by killing all those who oppose them. 7. Your job is STILL better than asking, "You want fries with that?" 8. If at first you don''t succeed, try management. 9. Teamwork means never having to take all the blame yourself. 10. The beatings will continue until morale improves. 11. Pride, Commitment, Teamwork. Words we use to get you to work for free. 12. Plagiarism saves time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the smart blonde? Neither did I!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she used the Grand Canyon as her sidewalk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day the goverment desided to see how we get along with other countries so they took an american, a frechman and a chinese guy and put them on an island for a year. They tell the american that he is in charge of building. They tell the frenchman that he is in charge of cooking. Then, finally they tell the chinese guy that he is in charge of supplies. One year later the goverment comes back and the american said: "Let me show you what I have built" and so he does. Then the frenchman said: "Let me show you what I have cooked." Then one of the goverment people asked what happened to the chinese guy and they said that the day that they were given their assigments he dissapeared. So they all start looking for him... Finally, the chinese guy jumps out of the woods and says: "Supplies!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our local minister had all of his remaining teeth pulled and new dentures made a few weeks ago. The first Sunday, his sermon lasted 10 minutes. The second Sunday, he preached only 20 minutes. But, on the third Sunday, he preached for an hour and a half. I asked him about this. He then told me "well, John, that first Sunday, my gums were so sore it hurt to talk. The second Sunday, my dentures were still hurting a lot. Now the third Sunday, I accidentally grabbed my wife''s dentures AND I COULDN''T STOP TALKING!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding. He kept on bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher. Finally, after he had bid way more than he intended, he won the bid - the parrot was his at last! As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the auctioneer, "I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can''t talk!" "Don''t worry," said the auctioneer, "he can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman meant to call a record store, but dialed the wrong number and got a private home instead. "Do you have ''Eyes of Blue'' and ''A Love Supreme?''" she asked. "Well, no," answered the puzzled homeowner. "But I have a wife and eleven children." "Is that a record?" the caller inquired, puzzled in her turn. "I don''t think so," replied the man, "but it''s as close as I want to get."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter. Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger coworker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one. As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong. Gasping for breath, she replied, "When I see two men from the gas company running as hard as you two were, I figured I''d better run too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was talking to a couple of boys in the school yard. Each was bragging about how great their fathers are. The first one said: "Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow!" The second one said: "Ha! You think that''s fast? My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet!" Little Johnny listened to the other two boys and shook his head. He then said: "Sorry, dudes... but MY DAD is the fastest. He''s a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30,... and he''s home by 3:45!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The priest was instructing a class of third- graders at All Saints grammar school. "There were two brothers, and one of them chose the wicked path of Satan. The brother was evil and corrupt and did great damage to many people, and wound up a convicted criminal in a tiny, dark cell. "But the other brother studied hard and became a great, rich, knowledgeable lawyer. "Now, children, what is the difference between these two brothers, who started out in the same place, who together embarked upon life''s stormy seas?" Herman raised his hand and said, "Easy. One of them got caught."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, about a month ago, the president was looking for a call girl. He found three such ladies in a local lounge - a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. To the blonde he said, "I am the President of the United States... How much would it cost me to spend some time with you? The blonde replied, "Two hundred dollars." To the brunette he posed the same question, and she replied, "One hundred dollars." He then asked the redhead the same question. The redhead replied, "Mr. President, if you can raise my skirt as high as my taxes... get my panties as low as my wages... get that thing of yours as hard as the times... keep it as high as the gas prices... keep me warmer than my apartment... and... screw me in private the way you do in public, then believe me Mr. President, it ain''t gonna cost you a cent."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma ain''t got no hands. And yo dad ain''t got no eyes. Yo momma said i''m goona slap the shit out of you. And yo daddy said i''d like to see that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Short naps prevent aging, especially if taken while driving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I came out of a convenience store the other day and some seedy looking guy walks up to me and holds up a little sign: "DEAF & DUMB... Can you spare $10?" Wow! What happened to a dollar or 2? So I reached into my pocket for my wallet, opened it, took out a folded piece of paper and handed it to him. It said: "I CAN''T READ" and I walked away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a little tip from me to you as an experienced traveler. Wake-up calls are the worst way to wake up. The phone rings, it''s loud and you can''t turn it down. I leave the number of the room next to me. It just rings very quietly and you hear a guy yell, "Why are you calling me?" Then I get up and take a shower. It''s great.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are three two letter words for small? Is It In?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most of us have a bad habit we are constantly trying to break. For me, it''s biting my fingernails. One day I told my husband about my latest solution: press-on nails. "Great idea, honey," he smiled. "You can eat them straight out of the box."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A taxpayer received a strongly worded "second notice" that his taxes were overdue. Hastening to the collector''s office, he paid his bill, saying apologetically that he had overlooked the first notice. "Oh," confided the collector with a smile, "we don''t send out first notices. We have found that the second notices are more effective."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you marry, your spouse''s family become "in-laws." So, when you divorce, does that make them "outlaws?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A property manager of single-family residence was showing a unit to prospective tenants and asking the usual questions. "Professionally employed?" he asked. "We''re a military family," the wife answered. "Children?" "Oh, yes, ages nine and twelve," she answered proudly. "Animals?" "Oh, no," she said earnestly. "They''re very well behaved."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy loved living in Staten Island, but he wasn''t crazy about the ferry. If you missed a ferry late at night, you had to spend the next hour or so wandering the deserted streets of lower Manhattan. So, when he spotted a ferry no more than fifteen feet from the dock, he decided he wouldn''t subject himself to an hour''s wait. He made a running leap and landed on his hands and knees, a little bruised maybe, but safe on deck. He got up, brushed himself off, and announced proudly to a bystander, "Well, I made that one, didn''t I?" "Sure did," the bystander said. "But you should have waited a minute or two. The ferry is just about to dock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny: "Hey, Daddy, Spot just ate Mom''s apple pie that was on the counter to cool off!" Dad: "Don''t worry, son. We''ll get you a new dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I picked up my mother-in-law at the airport. She''s getting a little up there. She''s at the age where she doesn''t remember things too well. So when I saw her I said, "Thanks for coming. Have a nice flight!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, how did you do? the boss asked his new salesman after his first day on the road. "All I got were two orders." "What were they? Anything good?" "Nope," the salesman replied. "They were ''Get out!'' and ''Stay out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do? His mother had an idea: "Why don''t you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your apartment for a home- cooked meal?" He thought this was a great strategy, and arranged a date for a week later. His mother called the day after the big date to see how things had gone. "The evening was a disaster," he moaned. "Why, didn''t she come over?" asked his mother. "Oh, she came over, but she refused to cook...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A juggler who was driving to his next performance was stopped by the police. "What are those knives doing in your car?" asked the officer. "I juggle them in my act." "Oh yeah?" says the cop. "Let''s see you do it." So the juggler starts tossing and juggling the knives. A guy driving by sees this and says, "Wow, am I glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they''re making you do now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn''t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma''am, they''re dead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, set them on fire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Over a round of golf, two doctors were talking shop. "I operated on Mr. Lee the other day," said the surgeon. "What for?" asked his colleague. "About $17,000." "What did he have?" "Oh... About $17,000."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The door bell rings, and a man answers it. Here stands Little Johnny, dressed well but plainly, who says, "Trick or Treat!" The man asks Johnny what he''s dressed up like that for at Halloween. Little Johnny says, "I''m an IRS agent"; then he takes 28% of the man''s candy, leaves, and doesn''t say Thank You.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman answered her front door and found Little Johnny and Billy holding a list. "Lady," Johnny explained, "we''re on a scavenger hunt, and we still need three grains of wheat, a pork-chop bone and a piece of used carbon paper to earn a dollar." "Wow," the woman replied. "Who sent you on such a challenging hunt?" "Our baby-sitter''s boyfriend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother has something wrong with her brain. After medical examination, the doctor tells her: "Your brain has two parts: one is left, and the other is right. Your left side has nothing right, Your right side has nothing left."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun walks into a liquor store and asks to buy a fifth of whiskey. She says it''s for Mother Superior''s constipation, so the owner says ok. She buys the booze and leaves. Two hours later, the owner closes store and walks through the park on his way home. As he''s walking, he spots the same nun sitting on a park bench, roaring drunk. "Shame on you, Sister", he says, "I thought that whiskey was for Mother Superior''s constipation." "It is," she slurrs. "When she sees me, she''ll crap!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While on the obstacle course in bootcamp, we had to lay on a rope and pull ourselves along. When I got to the other end and got my feet on the ground I asked my M/CPL if I could do that again. When he asked me why, I retorted with, "Well I have a groove down my left nut, I would like to put a groove down my right nut so they would match up again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A soldier''s letter home: Dear Mom, I can''t tell you where i am, but yesterday I shot a polar bear. Two weeks later, another letter home: Dear Mom, I can''t tell you where I am, but yesterday i danced with a hula girl. Two weeks later another letter home: Dear Mom, I still can''t tell you where I am, but yesterday the doctor told me I should have danced with the polar bear and shot the hula girl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so fat, she doesn''t need the Internet - she''s already world wide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redneck Christmas Shopping You know you''re a redneck when... you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend and only come back with one gift.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond employee calls the Help Desk to complain that there''s something wrong with her password. "The problem is that whenever I type the password, it just shows stars," she says. "Those asterisks are to protect you," the Help Desk technician explains, "so if someone were standing behind you, they wouldn''t be able to read your password." "Yeah," she says, "but they show up even when there is no one standing behind me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to the local psychic in hopes of contacting her dearly departed grandmother. The psychic''s eyelids begin fluttering, her hands float up above the table, and she begins moaning. Eventually, a coherent voice emanates saying, "Granddaughter? Are you there?" The woman, wide-eyed and on the edge of her seat, responds, "Grandmother? Is that you?" "Yes granddaughter, it''s me." "It''s really, really you, grandmother?" the woman repeats. "Yes, it''s really me, granddaughter." The woman looks puzzled, "You''re sure it''s you, grandmother?" "Yes, granddaughter, I''m sure it''s me." The woman pauses a moment, "Grandmother, I have just one question for you." "Anything, my child." "Grandmother, when did you learn to speak English?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At long last the good-humored boss was compelled to call Fisk into his office. "It has not escaped my attention," he pointed out, "that every time there''s a home game at the stadium you have to take your aunt to the doctor." "You know, you''re right, sir," exclaimed Fisk. "I didn''t realize it. You don''t suppose she''s faking it, do you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fresh out of business school, the young man answered a want ad for an accountant. Now he was being interviewed by a very nervous man who ran a small business that he had started himself. "I need someone with an accounting degree," the man said. "But mainly, I''m looking for someone to do my worrying for me." "Excuse me?" the accountant said. "I worry about a lot of things," the man said. "But I don''t want to have to worry about money. Your job will be to take all the money worries off my back." "I see," the accountant said. "And how much does the job pay?" "I''ll start you at eighty thousand." "Eighty thousand dollars!" the accountant exclaimed. "How can such a small business afford a sum like that?" "That," the owner said, "is your first worry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The day after Halloween, Little Johnny was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the 6th candybar one man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn''t good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat." Little Johnny replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old." The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?" Little Johnny answered, "No, he but he knew how to mind his own business!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister had just finished an excellent fried chicken dinner at the home of a congregation member when he saw a rooster come strutting through the yard. "That''s certainly a proud-looking rooster," the minister commented. "Yes, sir," replied the farmer. "He has reason to be proud-- one of his sons just entered the ministry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your joke is bad when.... - All the comments rated -2 or less are the ones that say they actually like it. - There AREN''T any comments at all. - People ask if you are boring in real life. - It was so "not funny", that it was actually funny. And last but not least - There are absolutly NO duplicates of your joke because it was so bad. (I wonder if I can say the same for this)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grade inflation, where assigned grades creep higher and higher, is a concern for teachers. What''s the logical limit of grade inflation? F - Student appears to be a multicellular organism. D - Student has mastered many autonomic bodily functions. C - Student can operate a writing instrument without harming self or others. B - Student is able to form a complete sentence, on the second or third try. A - Student has marginal to excellent understanding of the course material.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Girl went up to her mother and asked, "Mum, is Amsterdam a swear word?" "No, why?" She asked. "Is Rotterdam a swear word?" she asked. "No, why?" her mother repeated. "Well, I heard little sister talking behind my back after I showed her my lollipop, and she said ''I hope that that lollipop rot her damn teeth!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A visitor from Holland was chatting with his American friend and was jokingly explaining about the red, white and blue in the Netherlands flag. "Our flag symbolizes our taxes," he said. "We get red when we talk about them, white when we get our tax bill, and blue after we pay them." "That''s the same with us," the American said, "only we see stars, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, Mom, asked Johnny "Can you give me twenty dollars?" "Certainly not." "If you do," he went on, "I''ll tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop." His mother''s ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. "Well? What did he say?" "He said, ''Hey, Marie, make sure you wash my socks tomorrow.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a knock at the door. It was a small boy, about six years old. Something of his had found its way into my garage, he said, and he wanted it back. Upon opening the garage door, I noticed two additions: a baseball and a broken window sporting a baseball-sized hole. "How do you suppose this ball got in here?" I asked the boy. Taking one look at the ball, one look at the window, and one look at me, the boy exclaimed, "Wow! I must have thrown it right through that hole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wealthy man had a falling out with his two sons. It was serious enough that he decided to change his will. At his lawyer''s office, he threw his will on the table and said, "This needs an heircut."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Turtle was walking down the road when he spotted a crow at the tip top of a very tall tree. He shouted, "Good Morning, Mr. Crow." Mr. Crow shouted back down, "Good Morning Mr. Turtle." Mr. Turtle shouted up, "Whatcha doin'' today?" and the answer shouted back down was, "Absolutely nothin'' Mr. Turtle - Absolutely nothin'' and loving it." Well, that sounded pretty good to Mr. Turtle, so he shouted back up, "Do you think I could do that too?" Mr. Crow shouted back down, "I don''t see why not!" So, Mr. Turtle lay down on the side of the road and began Doing Absolutely Nothing. In 30 minutes a fox came along and ate him. The moral of the story is: You can get away with Doing Absolutely Nothing, but only if you are really high up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Because an increasing number of people are having heart attacks while gambling, the big, high-class casinos are now equipped with sophisticated defibrillators. They are computer-controlled to deliver the exact electric shock needed to revive a heart attack victim. That is, if you''re at a big, high-class casino. At the cheaper casinos downtown, they just drag you across the carpet and touch your finger to the doorknob.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, when she walked into a store the beeper went of twice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Doris Doris who? Door is shut thats why i knocked!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While suturing a laceration on the hand of a 73 year-old Texas rancher, whose hand had been caught in a gate while working cattle, a doctor and the old man were talking about George W. Bush being in the White House. The old Texan said, "Well, ya know, Bush is a ''post turtle.''" Not knowing what the old man meant, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was. The old man said, "When you''re driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that''s a post turtle." The old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor''s face, so he continued to explain, "You know he didn''t get there by himself, he doesn''t belong there, he doesn''t know what to do while he''s up there, and you just want to help the poor, stupid bastard get down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to his doctor and says, "Doc, I have a problem." "My girlfriend is sleeping over this Friday, my ex-wife is sleeping over this Saturday and my wife is coming home Sunday." "I need 3 Viagra pills to satisfy them all." The doctor says, "You know 3 Viagra pills 3 nights in a row is pretty dangerous for any man. I will give them to you on the condition that you return to my office on Monday so that I can check you out." The man says, "You have a deal Doc." Monday morning the man returns with his arm in a sling. The doctor asks, "What happened"? The man answered, "Nobody showed up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The newlywed wife said to her husband when he returned from work, "I have great news for you. Pretty soon, we''re going to be three in this house instead of two." Her husband ran to her with a smile on his face and delight in his eyes. He was glowing of happiness and kissing his wife when she said, "I''m glad that you feel this way since tomorrow morning, my mother moves in with us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The two thousand member Baptist church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The preacher was ready to start the sermon when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered through the rear of the church. One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and with drew automatic weapons. The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!" Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the chorus. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the chorus director and the assistant pastor. After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the church. The preacher was holding steady in the pulpit. The men put their weapons away and said, gently, to the preacher, "All right, pastor, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the service."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some times when the soap bar in the shower is small enough I like to swipe it thru my butt crack and say " beep! credit card accepted"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Amy was reading a newspaper while her husband was engrossed in a game on TV. Suddenly, she burst out laughing. "Listen to this, there''s a classified ad here where a guy is offering to swap his wife for a season tickets." "Hmmm," her husband said, not bothering to look away from the game. Amy said teasingly, "Would you swap me for season tickets?" "Absolutely not," he said, "season''s more than half over."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The landlady asked me if I minded making my own bed. I said I didn''t and she said great there''s a hammer and nails in the corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife has not spoken to me in three days. I think it has something to do with what happened on Sunday night when she thought she heard a noise downstairs. She nudged me and whispered, "Wake up, wake up!" "What''s the matter?" I asked. "There are burglars in the kitchen. I think they''re eating the tuna casserole I made tonight." "That''ll teach them!" I replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The religious cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range. Three weeks later a cow walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. The cowboy couldn''t believe his eyes. He took the precious book out of the cow''s mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, "It''s a miracle!" "Not really," said the cow. "Your name is written inside the cover."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An older gentleman had an appointment to see the urologist who shared an office with several other doctors. The waiting room was filled with patients. As he approached the receptionist desk he noticed that the receptionist was a large unfriendly woman who looked like a Sumo wrestler. He gave her his name. In a very loud voice, the receptionist said, "YES, I HAVE YOUR NAME HERE; YOU WANT TO SEE THE DOCTOR ABOUT IMPOTENCE, RIGHT?" All the patients in the waiting room snapped their heads around to look at the very embarrassed man. He recovered quickly, and in an equally loud voice replied, "NO, I''VE COME TO INQUIRE ABOUT A SEX CHANGE OPERATION, BUT I DON''T WANT THE SAME DOCTOR THAT DID YOURS."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? Pregnant! Why did the blonde die in the helecopter crash? She got cold so she turned off the fan! How did the blonde die ice fishing? She got ran over by the zamboni machine! ( Zambonis make the ice on skating rinks) How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves? She fell out of the tree! A blonde was taking a walk outside when a bird flew over her in the sky. When it suddenly dropped a load on her. What did she say? Good thing my mouth was open or it would''ve hit me in the face!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the brakes want to work? Because it was time for their lunch break.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friendships between women: A woman didn''t come home one night. The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend''s house. The man called his wife''s 10 best friends. None of them knew about it. Friendships between men: A man didn''t come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend''s house. The woman called her husband''s 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that yes, he had slept over and two claimed that he was still there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Upon realizing that we both had the same middle name, I told the blond, "Hey we have the same middle name!" She replied, "Really? What''s yours?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between girls aged: 8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58, 68 and 78? At 8 - You take her to bed and tell her a story. At 18 - You tell her a story and take her to bed. At 28 - You don''t need to tell her a story to take her to bed. At 38 - She tells you a story and takes you to bed. At 48 - You tell her a story to avoid going to bed. At 58 - You stay in bed to avoid her story. At 68 - If you take her to bed, that''ll be a story. At 78 - You can get out of bed, that''s another story.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was on a walking holiday in a foreign country. He became thirsty so decided to ask at a stranger''s home for something to drink. The lady of the house invited him in and served him a bowl of soup by the fire. There was a wee pig running around the kitchen - running up to the visitor and giving him a great deal of attention. The visitor commented that he had never seen a pig this friendly. The housewife replied: "Ummm, he''s not that friendly. That''s his bowl you''re using"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last week my wife and I purchased a new computer. We ran into some difficulties while setting it up so we called the customer support phone number we found in the manual. I picked up the phone and called the number. A man answered the phone and I explained the problem to him. He began rattling off computer jargon. This confused us even more. "Sir," I said politely, "Can you explain what I should do as if I were a small child?" "Okay," the computer support guy said, "Son, could you please put your mommy on the phone?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a posh Manhattan dinner party, a Latin American visitor was telling the guests about this home country and himself. As he concluded, he said, "And I have a charming and understanding wife but, alas, no children." As his listeners appeared to be waiting for him to continue, he said, haltingly, "You see, my wife is unbearable." Puzzled glances prompted him to try to clarify the matter: "What I mean is, my wife is inconceivable." As his companions seemed amused, he floundered deeper into the intricacies of the English language, explaining triumphantly, "That is, my wife, she is impregnable!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last summer, my husband, Bill, took me camping for the first time. At every opportunity, he passed along outdoor-survival lore. One day we got lost hiking in the deep woods. Bill tried the usual tactics to determine direction - moss on the trees (there was no moss), direction of the sun (it was an overcast day). Just as I was beginning to panic, he spotted a small cabin off in the distance. Bill pulled out his binoculars, studied the cabin, turned and led us right back to our camp. "That was terrific," I said. "How did you do it?" "Simple," he replied. "In this part of the country all TV satellite dishes point south."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a trial had been going on for three days, Finally, the blonde accused of committing the crimes, stood up and approached the judge''s bench. "Your Honor, I would like to change my plea from ''not guilty'' to ''guilty'' of the charges." The judge angrily banged his fist on the desk. "If you''re guilty, why didn''t you say so in the first place and save this court a lot of time and inconvenience?" he demanded. The blonde looked up wide-eyed and stated, "Well, when the trial started I thought I was innocent, but that was before I heard all the evidence against me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was on vacation in Texas, and was appalled by Dallas'' chaotic traffic. I asked the bellhop at the hotel why it was so disorderly and was told, "In some countries they drive on the right, in others on the left. Here we drive in the shade."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I were traveling on the Kansas Turnpike, bucking a 30 to 45 m.p.h. crosswind. At the tollbooth, I asked the attendant, "What do you people do in Kansas when the wind quits?" The tollbooth attendant didn''t miss a beat. She answered, "We take the rocks out of our pockets."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They have finally started practicing safe sex in Scotland... They now paint red X''s on the sheep that kick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mom, Bri, and a son, Jorge, were eating dinner at the dinner table. Jorge pushes his plate away and says, "I''m done." Bri glances at Jorge''s plate and notices he still has a pile of peas on it, "No you don''t. Not untill you eat all of your food." "I don''t like peas." "They are not peas they are green M&M''s but the trick is you can''t taste the candy untill you swallow them." Jorge gets excited and sticks a spoon full of peas in his mouth. Then he grabs his glass of milk and takes a drink. Jorge says, "your right mom they do taste like M&M''s. Why don''t you try?" "Who do you think you''re kidding?," replies Bri and gives Jorge a sly look. "Who do YOU think you''re kidding?," Jorge says grabbing his glass of milk and pouring the peas out of it onto his plate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she walks she creates hurricanes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok here are a few: I will try to be nicer if you try to be smarter. Don''t flatter yourself. I was looking at your friend. I don''t know what makes you so dumb, but it''s really working. Stupidity is not a crime, so you are free to go. If I throw a stick, will you go away? Warning: I am hearing voices and they don''t like you. Stupidity is a right but you are abusing the privilege. Your mouth keeps moving but all I hear is bla, bla, bla. On your mark, get set, go away. I would like to help you out. Which way did you come in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy: I''m having a problem with it. Girl: That''s not surprising, it''s very hard when you first learn. Guy: It''s not working. I can''t get it up. Girl: You just have to relax. It''ll happen. You just have to work at it. Guy: Alright, I''m supposed to do what with my tongue again?? Girl: Your tongue is the key, you have to use it like a tool. You have to know where to put your tongue where it''s needed. Feel for problem areas. Guy: pbpbpbpb. man. this sucks. Girl: Try again. just go slower. Guy: Its too hard! Girl: Soften it up. Guy: Show me again? Girl: *shows him* Guy: Alright, let me try now. Girl: Your first time is an experience you''ll always remember. I know you can do it! Guy: *tries again* pbpbpbb sssssssssss.... *POP!* Girl: You did it! Guy: Yea... learning to blow bubbles with bubble gum is too hard, I''ll stick with lollipops, thanks. Girl: Still, I knew you could do it! *Duh! What''d you think they were doing?!*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the melon jump into the water? Because it wanted to be a watermelon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is the difference between guts and balls. Guts is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to just "be there." Balls is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, "You''re next."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the penny jump off the cliff and not the quarter? Because the quarter had more cents!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Six is afraid of Seven because Seven ate (Eight) Nine, why did Six soon die? Because Six, Seven ate (Eight) (678)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story: A man was in a grocery store shopping, when he lit a cigarette. The manager walks up to him and politely asks him to extinguish it. The man refuses, saying " Well you sell cigarettes here, dont you?" The store manager replies " Yes sir we do, and we also sell condoms." The man quickly put the cigarette out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman rushes to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off, "Doctor, take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were blood-shot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What''s wrong with me, Doctor?" The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says, "Well, I can tell you one thing . . . there ain''t nothing wrong with your eyesight."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny: "Dad, stop drinking my root beer!!! Do I get free refills?" Dad: "Sure -- I backwashed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is that a mirror in your jeans? Because I can see myself in them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When you fell from heaven. Girl: Aww, did it hurt when you got kicked out of hell? Boy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. Girl: Really? If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put F and U together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why cant blondes make ice cubes? Because they dont have the recipe! 2 Two Blondes were in a car and came to a fork in a road, and the sign said Disneyland left. So they turned around and went home. 3 How do you know when a blonde''s been sending e-mail? Envelopes in the disk drive. 4 How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her a blonde joke. 5 Why don''t Blondes make good cattle ranchers? They can''t keep their calves together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why did the blonde cross the road? She was tied to the baby that was stapled to the chicken. 2 Why did the blonde take a right into the ditch? Her blinker was on 3 What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde''s ear ? Data transfer. 4 What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are some cute things kids thought up when asked to write about the moon (all the spelling mistakes are original!) The moon is a saterlight. A long time ago a big object hit the Moon and some of the moon fell off. If u look through a telliscope you can see big holes. There are big montines on the moon just like on Earth - they are some of the left-overs of the Moon in big lumps Neil Armstrong was the first person to step on the Moon. He had weights in his boots so he wouldn''t fall off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do starving Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common? They are both living off dead Beatles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has all of these funny little lines all over the screen. A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I turn my Etch-A-Sketch off? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: What''s the shortcut for Undo? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I create a New Document window? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I set the background and foreground to the same color? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: What is the proper procedure for rebooting my Etch-A-Sketch? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I delete a document on my Etch-A-Sketch? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I save my Etch-A-Sketch document? A: Don''t shake it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What''s the advantage of having a blonde as a girlfriend? You get to park in handicapped zones. 2 What do you call a blonde in a leather jacket? A rebel without a clue. 3 Why did God give blondes 2% more brains than horses? So they don''t crap on the street during parades!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde got lost in her car in a snowstorm. She remembered what her dad had once told her. ''''If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, wait for a snow plow and follow it.'''' Pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it. She followed the plow for about 45 minutes. Finally, the driver of the truck got out and asked her what she was doing. She explained that her dad had told her if she ever got stuck in the snow, to follow a plow. The driver nodded and said, ''''Well, I''m done with the parking lot here at Wal-Mart, now you can follow me over to K-Mart.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was this little girl''s first day of school and the teacher asked her what her name was and she replied, "Happy Butt." The teacher said, "Honey I don''t think that''s your name you need to go to the principal''s office and get this straightened out." So she went to the principal''s office and he asked, "What''s your name?" And the little girl said, "Happy Butt." The principal called the girl''s mother to get this straightened out once and for all. After getting off the phone he looked at the little girl and said, "Honey, your name''s is Gladys, not Happy Butt." The girl then exclaimed, "Glad Ass, Happy Butt what''s the difference?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a mouth without any teeth?- Grandma', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If men and women had buttons, a man''s button panel would look like... A vacuum - "On" and "Off" switch A woman''s panel would look like... An airplane. So many buttons...ahhh...where''s the mute?!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MISSION: GO TO GAP, BUY A PAIR OF PANTS Male Time: 6 min Cost: $33 Mission accomplished? Yes Extra stops: None Female Time: 3 hours 26 min Cost: $876 Mission accomplished? No Extra stops: Macy''s, JC Penny, Sears...etc...etc...etc...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chances of a Man Winning an Argument: Dating: 50% Engagement: 25% Marriage Period: 0%, very rare', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most people worry about getting AIDS from sex. Bill Clinton worries about getting sex from aides.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear Bill Clinton gave up playing his sax-a-phone? He now plays his whore-monica.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Clinton wants a postage stamp issued in his image? So he gets licked more often.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Monica Lewinsky in the White House after hours? Clinton was showing her the proper way to take "dic"tation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the new name for the place where Bill Clinton does his business? The Oral Office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Monica Lewinsky have on her resume? "Sat on the Presidential Staff"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does President Clinton invite so many ladies into his private study? He wants to show them his executive branch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Bill Clinton''s favorite movie ? Sex lies and video tape', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Bill''s definition of safe sex? When Hillary is out of town.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Clinton divert his attention from the latest controversy? He just keeps on plugging away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What goes clop... clop... clop... BANG! clop clop clop clop clop clop? A. An Amish driveby', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a blond, Blond? Isn''t it obvious? They''re dumb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m the kind of person who laughs at a joke three times: Once it''s told, once it''s explained, and 5 minutes later once I get it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke''s so old, it has mold on it! HA HA HA!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s pretty bad if you start typing "lol" as if it were a sentence (Lol.) Its worse if you start saying, "laugh out loud" in everday conversations. It''s absolutely horrible if you actually say, "l-o-l."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not all lawyers are bad. I''ve seen some graveyards full of good ones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a kangaroo''s favorite restaurant? IHOP!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang a picture of Jesus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? Tell her a joke on Wednesday. 2 What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears? Trying to hold on to a thought. 3 Why don''t blondes have elevator jobs? They don''t know the route. 4 Have you heard what my blond neighbor wrote on the bottom of her swimming pool? No smoking. 5 How do you drive a blonde crazy? Give her a bag of M&Ms and tell her to alphabetize them. 6 Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out the W''s. 7 How did the blonde die drinking milk? The cow fell on her. 8 Why do blondes like lightning? They think someone is taking their picture. 9 Why don''t blondes make good pharmacists? They can''t get the bottle into the typewriter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:After a runner reached the end of a long, gruelling marathon, officials were amazed to see him continue to run. Why did he do this? A:The man was let out of prison for the day to enter the marathon. He kept on running to avoid prison.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One year, a particular harried husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, he didn''t buy her a gift. When she asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven''t used the gift I bought you last year!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends, Al and Mike, were walking through the woods, when suddenly a snake jumped up and bit Mike on the penis. He was quickly down on the ground writhing in pain, so Al yelled,"Wait here while I run and get help!" So Al runs into town, gets to the doctors office, and tells him what happened. The doctor tells him he cannot leave the office, but told Al he would need to bite open the wound and suck out all of the venom. Al runs back into the woods, and finds Mike still writhing in pain. "What did the doctor say?" asked Mike. And Al told him, "The doctor says you''re gonna die!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate thongs! I mean, come on, Women don''t need to floss their butts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('War not determine who right, war determine who left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the name of a naked woman lying between two naked men? Sharin Peters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Stew Stew who? Stew cold out here, let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('IF I LOST A DOLLAR FOR EVERY BRAIN YOU HAVE, I WOULD BE IN DEBT', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which animals eat with their ears? All of them, since no animal takes its ears off to eat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do you call a blonde with ESP and PMS? A know-it-all bitch. 2 I told my blonde girlfriend that I was going skeet shooting. She told me she didn''t know how to cook them. 3 Did you hear about the blonde who was M.D. (mentallY deficient) 4 Why is it okay for blondes to catch cold? They don''t have to worry about blowing their brains out. 5 What''s five miles long and has an IQ of forty? A blonde parade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do you call five blondes at the bottom of the pool? Air bubbles! 2 What do you call 4 blondes lying on the ground? An air mattress. 3 What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home? She moved. 4 What are the worst six years in a blonde''s life? Third Grade. 5 Why did the blonde want to become a veterinarian? Because she loved children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why did God create brunettes? So ugly men wouldn''t feel left out 2 Why do brunettes like their dark hair color? It doesn''t show the dirt 3 Why are brunettes so proud of their hair? It matches their mustache. 4 What do brunettes miss most about a great party? The invitation. 5 What do you call a good-looking man with a brunette? Gay, married, or a hostage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('here is a link to the joke http://miamistreetracing.com/forum/v...d.php?tid=2385', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma is so fat she never wakes up on the wrong side of the bed; she wakes up on EVERY side of the bed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn''t paying attention in class. She called on him and said, "Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?" Little Johnny quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 JACK AND JILL Went up the hill To have a little fun. Stupid Jill forgot the pill And now they have a son. 2 MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB Her father shot it dead. Now it goes to school with her, Between two hunks of bread. 3 HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the kings'' horses, And all the kings'' men. Had scrambled eggs, For breakfast again. 4 HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle, All over the bedside clock. The little dog laughed to see such fun. Then died of electric shock. 5 There was a little girl who had a little curl Right in the middle of her forehead. When she was good, she was very, very good. But when she was bad........ She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What is the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot? Bigfoot has been spotted. 2 How do you drown a blonde? Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool. 3 What''s the blonde''s cheer? "I''m blonde, I''m blonde, I''m B.L.O.N....ah, oh well... 4 What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts? Change. 5 How does a blonde moonwalk? She pulls down her panties and slides her butt along the floor!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do you get when you cross a blonde and a gorilla? Who knows, there is only so much a gorilla can be forced to do. 2 Why does a blonde only change her baby''s diapers every month? Because it says on it "good for up to 20 pounds." 3 Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months? Because on the box it said From 2-4 years. 4 What do you say to a blonde with no arms and no legs? "Nice boobs!" 5 How does a blonde high-5? She smacks herself in the forehead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde''s head? A Space Invader. 2 What''s a blondes'' favorite rock group? Air Supply. 3 What do you see when you look into a blonde''s eyes? The back of her head. 4 Why do blondes have see-through lunch box lids? So that when they''re on the train they can tell if they''re going to work or coming home. 5 What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why are blondes hurt by people''s words? Because people keep hitting them with dictionaries. 2 What''s the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley? The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own. 3 What do you call a blonde behind a steering wheel? An air bag. 4 Did you hear about the blonde coyote? Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck. 5 Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver''s License? Because she got an F in sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Found on Roadside Dead Fucked Over Re-built Dodge', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma jokes are so stupid, I barf everytime I see one!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build weapons and Civil Engineers build targets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer; just look at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." The last one said, "Actually, it was a civil engineer. I mean, who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Normal people believe that "If it ain''t broke, don''t fix it." Engineers believe that "If it ain''t broke, it doesn''t have enough features yet"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hiker gets lost in the woods and spends the next two days wandering around with no food. Finally, he spots a bald eagle on a ledge, hits it with a big rock, and begins eating it raw. A park ranger stumbles on the scene and arrests the hiker for killing an endangered species. In court the hiker explains that he was on the edge of starvation and had no choice. "Considering the circumstances, I find you not guilty," says the judge. "But I have to askwhat did the eagle taste like?" "Well, your honor," the hiker says, "it tasted like a cross between a whooping crane and a spotted owl."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Signs in our world... Please be safe. Do not stand, sit, climb or lean on zoo fences. If you fall, animals could eat you and that might make them sick. Thank you. OUR AIM IS TO KEEP THIS BATHROOM CLEAN. GENTLEMEN: Your aim will help. Stand closer. It''s shorter than you think. LADIES: Please remain seated for the entire performance. CAUTION: This machine has no brain. Use your own. St. Cyril of Alexandria Catholic Church Staying in bed shouting, Oh, God! does not constitute going to church. Diocese of Galveston-Houston. Stiff Nipples Air Conditioning Service. 020 8797 2690 Note to NiteLink Passengers. Ladies, the poles are fitted for your safety. No dancing. Attention Dog Guardians: Pick up after your dogs. Thank you. Attention Dogs: Grrrr, bark, woof. Good dog. Mr. Toskana has had an expensive divorce and now needs the money, so SALE NOW ON!! PLEASE Don''t throw your cigarette butts on the floor. The cockroaches are getting cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old photographers never die, they just go out of focus!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the blonde go on the amusement park ride? Because he was too tall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer? A. The joystick is wet. Q. Why do blondes wear underwear? A. To keep their ankles warm. Q. What is a brunette between two blondes? A. An interpreter. Q. What''s the difference between a blonde and a brick? A. The brick doesn''t follow you home after you lay it. Q. Did you hear about the blonde that needed gas money? A. She sold her car for it.. Q. What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? A. "Are you sure it''s mine?" Q. Why do blondes have bruised belly buttons? A. Because they have blond boyfriends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? A. Their both empty from the neck up. Q. What do you call a blonde with pig tails? A. A blow job with handlebars. Q. What do you call a blond with a brain? A. A golden retriever. Q. What do you call a blonde in the closet? A. The 1984 hide and go seek champion. Q. How can you tell that a blonde sent you a fax? A. It has a stamp on it. Q. What do you call a room full of blondes with PMS and yeast infections? A. A wine and cheese party! Q. How do you drown a blonde? A. Put a scratch ''n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool. Q. Hear about the blonde that bought an AM radio? A. It took her a month to figure out she could play it at night too. Q. What did the blonde say when she saw the banana peel on the floor? A. Oh no, I''m going to fall again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma so stupid, she wanted to go on a roller coaster and looked at the height, and she was too tall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid is holding a conversation with a talking dog. "Why do you poop in people''s yards?" asks the little kid. "We''ve learned to sit and we''ve learned to stay," said the dog. "We''ve learned to lay down, roll over, and play dead. People taught us the ''No'' command, the ''Heel'' command, and even the ''Shake Paws'' command. But nobody ever thought to teach us the ''GET THE F*** OUT OF MY YAAAARD!!!!'' command!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock GO AWAY!!! WE DON''T WANT ANY!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t think of yourself as an ugly person, think of yourself as a really pretty monkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was everyone at the fancy King Crab Night Diner arrested? They were breaking the claw! So punny!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the quickest way to a woman''s heart? Through her left breast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What can you sit on, sleep on, and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, two women and a man die. When they go to heaven, St. Peter tells them they could do whatever they want as long as they didn''t step on a pink cloud. One day, one of the three people were seen walking with two ugly men. "I tripped and fell on a pink cloud," she explained, "then **POOF** here he was." The next day, the other woman was seen walking with an even uglier guy! She said, "I was pushed onto a pink cloud. Then **POOF** here was this gross guy." A few days later, the two women, and their ugly men, saw the guy that had died walking with a gorgeous woman. They asked him what happened. He said, "Oh, she stepped on a pink cloud."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s a Polar Bear''s favorite cereal? A: Ice Krispies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a circus and congress have in common? They are both full of CLOWNS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so scary, she scares Michael Jackson!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best way to talk to a shark? Long distance!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill was fixing a door and he found that he needed a new hinge, so he sent his wife Mary to the hardware store. At the hardware store, Mary saw a beautiful teapot on a top shelf while she was waiting for Carl, the manager, to finish waiting on a customer. When Carl was finished, Mary asked how much for the teapot. Carl replied, "That''s silver and it costs $100! "My goodness, that sure is a lotta money!" Mary exclaimed. Then she proceeded to describe the hinge that Bill had sent her to buy, and Carl went to the back room to find it. From the back room Carl yelled, "Mary, you wanna screw for that hinge?" Mary replied, "No, but I will for the teapot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a depressed crocodile decides to see his doctor about his problems. He says, "Doc, I''m not sure what''s wrong with me. I don''t feel like killing people anymore. I don''t like attacking them, I don''t like wrestling them in the water, and I definitely don''t like eating them." The doctor goes over to his medicine cabinet, and pulls out several tiny blue pills. In amazement, the crocodile asks his doctor, "Doc, are those what I think they are?" The doctor replies, "Yes, I''m prescribing you some Viagra." Frustrated, the crocodile tells his doctor, "I''m not sure you understand -- have you been listening to a word I''ve said?" The doctor replies, "Of course I''ve been listening, you said you had a reptile dysfunction!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife are dining at a table in a plush restaurant, and the husband keeps staring at an old drunken lady swigging her gin as she sits alone at a nearby table. Finally the wife asks, "Do you know her?" "Yes," sighs the husband, "She''s my ex-wife. She took to drinking right after we divorced seven years ago, and I hear she hasn''t been sober since." "My God!" says the wife, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so nasty she''s got to pour sand down her pants to keep the crabs happy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Dick Cheney say before he shot his hunting companion? Ready, Fire, Aim!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an intelligent, good looking man? A: A rumor!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a handcuffed man? A: Trustworthy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock? Who''s There? Ice Cream. Ice Cream who? I scream for Ice Cream!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where do spiders go to learn new words? A: WEB-sters dictionary!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the poor dog chase his tail? He was trying to make ends meet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever walk into a room and forget what you came in for? Well, that''s probably how dogs spend most of their lives...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s like a cell phone: Free on nights and weekends!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mamma is like a shot gun: One cock and shes ready to blow!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George Bush to friend: Sorry I forgot your birthday. Dick Cheney forgot to put it on my to-do list.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boys are like public toilets; they''re either taken, or full of crap. (no offense to you boys)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two good ole boys down in Alabama were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer...After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd, "If''n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday & make love to your wife while you was off huntin'', and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us kin?" The 2nd guy crooked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head, and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question. Finally, he says, "Well, I don''t know about kin, but it sure would make us even."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up. 2. Grandchildren are God''s reward for not killing your own children. 3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young. 4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn''t have said. 5. The main purpose of holding children''s parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own. 6. We childproofed our homes but they are still getting in. ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day. AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: "TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man''s wife was in labor with their first child. Things were going pretty well when suddenly the man''s wife began to shout, "Shouldn''t, couldn''t wouldn''t, didn''t, can''t!!" The man said,"Doctor, what''s wrong with my wife?!" The doctor replied, "Nothing. She''s just having contractions."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why isn''t there a pro football team in Flint, Michigan? A: Because then Detroit would want one too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid and so fat that when she stepped on the scale and saw three 7s, she thought she won the jackpot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb when she got locked in the matress king she slept on the floor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a red head and a brunette are all skateboarding and bragging about their best tricks. The brunette says, "I can do a double impossible and a misty." The red head says, "Thats nothing. I can do a 1080 flip off a quarter pipe, then do a double double and land it without falling". Then the blonde says, "I dont know what the big deal is with all of you guys, I can do all those with no hands!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('your daddies so old, i slapped his butt and his balls fell off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SAY IT REALLY FAST SAY*PINK CHEESE GREEN GHOST* FAST IF UR A TRUE LATINO YOULL GET WAT THIS MEANS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why are black people so good at basket ball? because they can Run, shoot and steal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she uses a rocket ship as a dildo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be redneck if you''ve totaled every car you''ve owned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you answer to more than one nickname.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you have orange road cones in your living room!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your toenail clippers say craftsman on the side!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve never stayed in a hotel without stealing something', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve ever videotaped a dog loving on someone''s leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You take me out way too much!!! Do you think this dress makes me look too slim? You looked stressed out, let me give you a massage. Go out with your friends tonight, you deserve it. That Pamala Anderson has a lovely body. No, no you buy me too much already. A fake diamond will do. My mother is a real old wench. What headache?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We have found the perfect mate for all of you ladies out there. This mate... will always stop watching t.v. and cuddle with you without expecting something in return. Is always happy to hear about your day when you get home. Never complains about your cooking, or lack of. Never gets mad when you roll over in bed and say you''re too tired. Never yells back at you when you are having a mood swing due to pms. Finally ladies here is your perfect mate.... A PUPPY!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It can buy a bed - but not sleep It can buy a clock - but not time It can buy you a book - but not knowledge It can buy you a position - but not respect It can buy you medicine - but not health It can buy you blood - but not life So you see, money isn''t everything, and it often causes pain and suffering. I tell you all this because I am your friend, and as your friend I want to take away your pain and suffering....... So send me all your money and I will suffer for you!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the squirrel cross the road? Because it was NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There Is an old lady who lives in a 14 story hotel. She lives on the 14th floor. Every morning, she goes down into the lobby, gets cereal and goes on a walk. On mornings when it is raining, she uses the elevator all of the way up to get to her room after she goes on her walk. On mornings when it is not raining after she''s eaten, she only goes to floor 7 and then uses the stairs to walk the rest of the way up. Why? Because she is a midget. On mornings when it is raining, she has her umbrella to go on the walk so she can use the umbrella to touch the top button in the elevator. When it isnt raining, she doesn''t have her umbrella and she can only reach the button for floor 7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blind guy, walking down the street. He passes a fish market, smells the fish and says," Good morning ladies."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What amimal walks with its feet on its head? a flea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the rooster cross the road? To fuck the chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the elephant cross the road? Because the chiken retired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she sat on the tv and watched the couch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks in to the Barbershop. Barber says, "What will it be today?" Guy says, "Well, I want it going with my waves on top, faded on one side, plug the other, and just make it all out of shape and messed up." Barber says, "Now why in the world do you want your hair cut like that?" Guy says, "That''s how you cut it last time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she was runing in the street with a yellow raincoat and the kids thougth they mised the bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Tigger smell so bad? Cause he''s always hanging out with Pooh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a guy who didn''t know which train station would take him to L.A. So, he asked a guy nearby,"What train takes me to L.A? The left, or right train?" The answer was, "If you go to the right one, you''ll be left and if you go to the left one, you''ll be right."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother-in-law was a gay minister, so when his sister wanted a small, casual wedding, she asked him to officiate. He had never performed a marriage ceremony before, so he decided to ask his pastor for advice. "My sister has asked me to marry her," he began, "and I''m not sure what I should do." The minister answered, "Try telling her you just want to be friends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once i bought a squirrel and I named it Melinda, and then I gave it food and then it died! Now I have a box named Joice Ann and I gave it some water and it fell down and then it died!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a man wear two pairs of pants when he goes golfing? He might get a hole in one!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people say "This is the first day of the rest of your life"? Isn''t that true about everyday unless you die that day?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boys are like diapers.... Always on my ass and full of shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what do you get when you cross a LAWYER and a LIBRARIAN? All the information you want, but you can''t understand it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady one day decides to place an ad for a good relationship in bed. she said muct not have hands to beat her, must not have feet to walk on her and must be good in bed. one day, the doorbell rang and she answered it. a man with no legs, or hands is there and says " Are u from the ad" she says yeah. she says then " You have no hands so u cant beat me, you have no feet so you wont walk over me, but tell me this... are u good in bed"? he replies "How do u think i rang the doorbell"?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once I like bought a fox and I like named him Jorge and like he died and I cried so I bought shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once I went to visit my cousin in Jersey and I was looking for his house and when I found his house I rang the doorbell and like I said, "Hey cuz" and he answered I''m not your cousin. Then I said, "Yes I am, and then he closes the door on me. So I like call my mom, right? Then I like say, "Mom, my cousin says he''s not my cousin." Then my mom says, "You don''t have a cousin in Jersey." And I''m like, "Oh cool", and then I got a fox.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde with a green stripe in her hair, walked into a barbor shop. The barbor asks where the brunette got the haircolor. She replies "Natural." He asks the red-head the same. She says, "Natural." Then he asks the blonde the same question, and she rubs the back of her hand over her nose, and on the green stripe, and says "Natural."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blond College Exam HINT: this is an exam 1.Spell yes 2.spell no 3. what is 0-0 ANSWER:0 4. answer yes to this question 5. are you human 6. what did you answer #4 HINT: #=number 7. what number is this 8. is this an exam a):yes b);yes 9. spell your name 10. leave this one blank 11. write an aswser 12. check your email 13. repeat 14.eat. 15. turn in paper REQUIREMENTS:Do #15 all others might be wrong IF YOU MET THE REQUIREMENTS, YOU NOW HAVE A SCHOLARSHIP TO HARVORD FOR (4) BLONDS ANSWERS 1. yes 2. no 3. 0 4. yes 5. yes 6. yes 7. 7 8. circle 9. sexy 10. 11. 9 12 he likes me 13. he doesn''t 14. eggs 15. 15. 15.HEY BLONDY GO DIE NOTE: noone has ever passed test', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns telling their adventures on the seas. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch. Curious, the seaman asks "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?" The pirate replies "I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off". "Wow!" said the seaman. "What about the hook"? "Well...", replied the pirate, "We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemies cut my hand clean off." "Incredible!" remarked the seaman. "How did you get the eye patch"? "A seagull dropping fell into my eye," replied the pirate. "You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?" the sailor asked. "Well..." said the pirate, "That was my first day with the hook."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three friends a surgeon, an engineer, and a politician were discussing which of their professions was the oldest. The surgeon said "Eve was created from Adam''s rib, a surgical procedure." The engineer replied: "Before Adam and Eve, order was created out of chaos, and that was an engineering job." The politician said, "Yes, but who do you suppose created the chaos?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three college professors were driving down the highway at a very slow speed. A policeman pulled them over and explained that driving so slowly on the highway could be hazardous. The driver pointed out the sign that read "20." He explained that he was going 20 mph because of the sign. The policeman pointed out that the sign indicated they were driving on Highway 20. Somewhat embarrassed the professor apologized and promised to be more observant. As the policeman turned to walk back to his car, he noticed the other two professors on the floor ...looking scared to death! He asked the driver, "What''s wrong with them?" The driver replied, "We just turned off Highway 105."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a guy who lived in a blue, one story house. EVERYTHING in the house was blue. The refridgerator, all of the food, the tables, the chairs, the clothes of the man, the TV, the camera, the dishwasher, the washing machine, and even the man himself. What color were the stairs? Suspected Answer: Blue Real Answer: There were no stairs!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('when your mom whent to China people would say "Run it''s Godzilla!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so fat when she hugs people they get lost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you say when you see a group full of black people? A: Where is the cream filling?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do alot of people go to black peoples yard sales? A:To get there stuff back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid she got locked up in the bathroom and she peed in her pants!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, when she went in a hot air balloon there was a solar eclipse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if your fence doubles as your clothesline', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if you have season tickets for the tractor pull.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if you would rather your son have his own hunting show than become a doctor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if a city night on the town includes city jail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if your bathroom towels are also your bathroom curtains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You may be a redneck if your burglar alarm is a vacuum cleaner plugged into a motion detector.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve ever watched a tornado from a lawn chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if you paint your garage with a paintball gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve ever been fired for shooting spitballs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists gathered three musicians together and asked them to name the greatest invention of the 20th century. The guitarist said the "wah-wah pedal" was the greatest invention. After that, they asked the drummer and he said the "bass pedal" was the greatest invention. Then finally, when asking the bass player, he said the "Stanley thermos" was the greatest invention. Confused, they asked him how he figured that, and he said: "Hot or cold how does it know, HOW DOES IT KNOW!?!?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At last. A bumper sticker for both parties. FINALLY, Someone has come out with a 100% bipartisan political bumper sticker. This hot selling bumper sticker comes from the great state of New York! "RUN HILLARY RUN" Democrats put it on the rear bumper. Republicans put it on the front bumper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde buys a thermos. Two days later, she''s back in the shop and wants a refund. The sales person asks her why she''s returning it. She replies, "Well, when I bought it, you said it would keep hot things hot and cold things cold, but yesterday I took some coffee and ice-cream to work for after lunch, and all that came out was a luke-warm slush!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black guy and a white guy having sex? mixed nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a nun''s urine? Virgin Lemonade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she makes the sun look like a pebble!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so nasty, when she burped she started a nuclear war!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to Make Cookies: 1. Make the batter with everything but the vanilla. 2. Walk to your nearest appliance shop. 3. Buy a telephone and walk home. 4. Call a friend. 5. Have her drive you to the airport. 6. Buy a plane ticket to St. Louis MO, USA (home is where the heart is). 7. Walk to a little shop and buy a little measuring cup. 8. Walk back to the airport (I hope you have good shoes, it might be a long walk). 9. Catch a plane home. 10. Measure the vanilla. WAIT! You''re a TSP. short... 11. Call your friand back, have her drive you to the airport again... 12. Buy vanilla.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are opera singers and sailors alike? They both have to handle the high seas(Cs)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A plane was flying from New York to Canada. The plane crashes right on the border line. Where do you burry the survivors? They don''t because they are survivors, therefor they never died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, she filled up the tub before she put the water in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING: Racial insult to a black person. Why could a black person never get oral sex? Because the black person would taste like horribly burned food.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On Halloween night a kid is standing on a bench with a fake beard, fake fangs, a tennis racket, a baseball cap, and a purple cape. A snobby man walks by and says, "What are you supposed to be?" The kid says, "Duh! I''m a kid standing on a bench wearing fake fangs, a fake beard, a baseball cap, a purple cape and holding a tennis racket! What did you think I was?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy was in a bookstore with his dad. They were browsing for books when the little kid said,"You know American Idol?" His dad said, "Yeah." The kid then said, "If they win, they''ll become poptarts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do blondes and cow pies have in common? The older they get, the easier they are to pick up. 2 What did the blonde do when her doctor told her she had sugar in her urine? She peed on her corn flakes. 3 What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency? She turned it over and used the other side. 4 Did you hear about the stupid blonde? She got hit by a parked car. 5 Why can''t the blonde add 10 and 7 on a calculator? Because she can''t find the 10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What device lets you see through a wall? A: Window', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) What do you say to a Blonde that won''t give in? "Have another beer." 2) What''s the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator? The blonde works in the dark! 3) How do you keep a blonde busy for hours? Scroll down... Scroll up... 4) So a blonde is walking down the street and she stops to ask a man the time, he says "O, it''s uhh...4:45." The blonde responds, "Man, I''ve been asking that question all day and I get a different answer every time! 5) Superman, Batman, and a smart blonde all died on the same day.Which one got to Heaven first? None of them.They are all make-believe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you stare at the orange juice container because it says concentrate on it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she wore a blue rain coat people said, "Let''s go swim in the ocean!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you ride the electric floorbuffer and mistake it for your wife!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. What''s the real reason a brunette keeps her figure? No one else wants it. 2. What''s a brunette''s mating call? "Has the blonde left yet?" 3. What do you call a brunette who dies her hair blonde? Artifical Stupidity 4. What kind of costumes do brunette girls wear on Halloween? They just stand on their heads and go as dirty mops. 5. Why don''t brunettes get breast implants? They''ve already spent their money on thigh and butt implants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you wear a tube top to a funeral!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might think that some guys are hot. Their boyfriends think that, too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant. Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult The Face Is Familiar, But I Can''t Quite Remember My Name I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To Fight Crime: Shoot Back! Caution -- Driver Legally Blonde! If You Drink Don''t Park. Accidents Cause People. If You''re Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass. You''re Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If we quit voting, will they all go away? It''s been lovely but I have to scream now I haven''t lost my mind -- it''s backed up on disk somewhere Boldly going nowhere Don''t be sexist -- broads hate that Old lawyers never die, they just lose their appeal. How could two people as beautiful as you have such an ugly baby?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. After having met you, I''ve changed my mind. I must admit, you brought Religion in my life. I never believed in Hell til I met you. Looking back over the years that we''ve been together, I can''t help but wonder: What the hell was I thinking? As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am that you''re not here to ruin it for me. As you grow older, Mom, I think of all the gifts you''ve given me. Like the need for therapy...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thanks for being a part of my life!!! I never knew what evil was before this! Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go, I would like to take this knife out of my back. You''ll probably need it again. Someday I hope to get married, but not to you. Sorry things didn''t work out, but I can''t handle guys with boobs that are bigger than mine. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age...Almost Lifelike!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris is.... ...stupid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an arctic animal shaped like a tooth? A: A molar bear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not Funny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What did the frog order at McDonald''s? Answer: An order of french flies and a diet croak!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pope was finishing his sermon. He ended it with the Latin phrase, "Tuti Homini" - Blessed be Mankind. A women''s rights group approached the Pope the next day. They noticed that the pope blessed all Mankind, but not Womankind. The next day, after His sermon, the Pope concluded by saying, "Tuti Homini, et Tuti Femini" - Blessed be Mankind and Womankind. The next day, a gay-rights group approached the Pope. They said that they noticed that he blessed man kind and woman kind, and asked if he could also bless gay people. The Pope said, "Sure". The next day, the Pope concluded his sermon with, "Tuti Homini, et Tuti Femini, et Tuti Fruiti."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why don''t blondes eat bananas? They can''t find the zipper. 2 Why don''t blondes use vibrators? They chip their teeth. 3 Why don''t blondes in San Francisco wear short black mini skirts? Cause their balls show. 4 Why don''t a blondes eyes fall out of her when she stands? The vacuum in her head keeps them in place. 5 What does a blonde answer to the question "Are you sexually active?" "No, I just lie there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man from Perdition Who knew his way around a kitchen His wife was good lookin'' The kids loved his cookin'' But his mother-in-law kept on bitchin''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar. He falls down, unconscious. Why is this? Because the man walked into a solid bar. A solid, metal bar!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, a beautiful, independent, and self assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped onto the princess'' lap and said, "Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and setup housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so." Later that night, as the princess dined sumptuously on a repast of lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled to herself and thought longingly about what her dinner said... "I don''t freakin'' think so!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when you give a politician viagra? He gets taller.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brenda O''Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door. "Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I''ve some thin'' to tell ya." "Of course you can come in. You''re always welcome, Tim. But where''s me husband?" "That''s what I''m here to be telling ya, Brenda. There was an accident at the Guinness brewery." " Oh, God, no!" cries Brenda. "Please don''t tell me." "I must, Brenda. Your husband Seamus is dead and gone. I''m sorry." Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?" "It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned." "Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?" "Well, Brenda, no. In fact, he got out three times to pee."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens to a scone when you have eaten it? It''s scone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so dumb she studied for a urine test!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, yo daddy had eye surgery TO REMOVE HIS SIGHT!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a turtle loses its shell is it naked or homeless? If fire fighters fight fires and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight??? If nothing sticks to teflon, then how do they make teflon stick to the pan? Why do Kamikaze pilots wear seatbelts? If love is blind, then why is lingere so popular? Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? If a black box flight recorder is never damaged in a plane crash, why dont they make the whole plane out of that stuff? Why is there an expiration date on sour cream? If most car accidents occur within 5 kilometers of home, then why doesnt every one just move 5 k''s away? Why are psychics still working if they all know the winning lottery numbers? If you try to fail, but you succeed, which have you done?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was relieved of duty early, and arrived home four hours ahead of schedule, at 2 AM. Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, crept into the bedroom, and started to climb into bed. She sleepily sat up and said, "Mike, dearest, would you go down to the all-night drug store on the next block and get me some aspirin? I''ve got a splitting headache." "Certainly, honey," he said, and feeling his way across the room, he got dressed and walked over to the drug store. As he arrived, the pharmacist looked up in surprise, "Say," said the druggist, "aren''t you Officer Fenwick of the 8th District?" "Yes, I am," said the officer. "Well, then, what in the world are you doing in the Fire Chief''s uniform?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cover Charge: $15.00 Round of Drinks: $23.00 Table Dance: $30.00 Another Round of Drinks: $23.00 Couch Dance and Tips: $50.00 A Round of Shots: $34.00 Another Round of Drinks: $23.00 Lap Dance and Hand Job: $100.00 Private Dance and Hotel Room: $500.00 Sending her on her way without having to cuddle or listen to her: ...........PRICELESS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newfie is walking down Yonge street in Toronto and sees a store front. The only thing inside are 2 guys sitting on stools. The newfie walks in and says "Hey what are you guys selling?" The one guy, recognizing the accent as being newfie, says "we''re selling assholes!" The newfie responds "HOLY SHIT! Business must be good; you only have 2 left!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where is the safest place to hide money from a redneck? In his work boots! How can you tell a redneck has been in your backyard? Your bike is gone and the dog is pregnant!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many newfies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 2 one to hold the light bulb and 1 to spin him round and round.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many Newfie farmers does it take to milk a cow? A: 5...One to hold the utter and four to lift the cow up and down, up and down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse a redneck Ask him a question that is not about NASCAR.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how are we alike?" "You''re both old," he replied!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Relish today, ketchup tomorrow! A hamburger walks into the bar, and the bartender says, "Sorry, we don''t serve food here." I wanted to be a mime, but I talked myself out of it. Doctors tell us there are over seven million people who are overweight. These, of course, are only round figures.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you call a man with no arms and no legs at a work-out place? Jim What you call a man with no arms and no legs at your door? Matt What you call a man with no arms and no legs in your bathroom? John What you call a man with no arms and no legs in a trench? Phil What you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pit? Doug What you call a man with no arms and no legs with a cat? Tom What you call a girl with one leg? Ilene What you call a Japanese girl with one leg? Irene What do you call a pig with no legs? Groundhog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frankienstien was out on a rainy day and he saw a very ugly guy. "Lookin'' good!" he said to him. Later he saw a super model he said, "So, how''d you get to be a mutant?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem. A small child replied, "They couldn''t get a baby-sitter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wise schoolteacher sends this note to all parents on the first day of school: "If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school, I''ll promise not to believe everything he says happens at home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord''s Prayer. For several evenings, at bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer: "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us from e-mail. Amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy. The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions. "Ever have an accident?" "Nope, nary a one." "None? You''ve never had any accidents." "Nope. Ain''t never had one. Never." "Well, you said on this form you were bit by a snake once. Wouldn''t you consider that an accident?" "Heck, no. That dang varmint bit me on purpose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tall weather-worn cowboy walked into the saloon and ordered a beer. The regulars quietly observed the drifter through half-closed eyelids. No one spoke, but they all noticed that the stranger''s hat was made of brown wrapping paper. Less obvious was the fact that his shirt and vest were also made of paper. As were his chaps, pants, and even his boots, including the paper spurs. Truth be told, even the saddle, blanket and bridle on his horse were made entirely of paper. Of course he was soon arrested for rustling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a friend''s wedding, everything went smoothly, until it was time for the flower girl and her young escort to come down the aisle. The boy stopped at every pew, growling at the guests. When asked afterward, why he behaved so badly, he explained, "I was just trying to be a good ring bear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks, "What are you doing?!!" The blind man replies, "Just looking around."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The farmer''s son was returning from the market, with the crate of chicken''s his father had entrusted to him, when all of a sudden, the box fell and broke open. Chickens scurried off in different directions, but the determined boy walked all over the neighborhood, scooping up the wayward birds, and returning them to the repaired crate. Hoping he had found them all, the boy reluctantly returned home, expecting the worst. "Pa, the chickens got loose," the boy confessed sadly, "but I managed to find all twelve of them." "Well, you did real good, son," the farmer beamed. "You left with seven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her brunette friend were talking. The blonde says, "I hate all the blonde jokes people say." "Oh, they are only jokes. There are alot of stupid people out there. Here I''ll prove it to you," replies her brunette friend. So they went outside and hailed a taxi driver. "Please take me to 29 Nickle Street to see if I''m home," said the brunette. The taxi drove them, and when they finally got out, the brunette looked at the blonde and said, "See, that guy was really stupid." "No kidding," replies the blonde." There was a pay phone just around the corner. You could have called instead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son is proof that anyone can be successful enough to drive a BMW or Mercedes. And besides, he looks so cute in his valet parking attendant uniform.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elementary school teacher asked her students to write a truthful report on what they would do if they had a million dollars. There was only one student who recieved an A, and the rest failed for lying. This was the paper with the A: Johnny ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? Prostitutes Appeal to Pope Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax Miners Refuse to Work after Death Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant Stolen Painting Found by Tree Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One War Dims Hope for Peace Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge Deer Kill 17,000 Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft Kids Make Nutritious Snacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half New Vaccine May Contain Rabies Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing Air Head Fired Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction Sex Education Delayed, Teachers Request Training Include your Children when Baking Cookies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there? Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime? If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen? You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"? Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the french dog look in the toilet? Wee wee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Might be a Redneck If you take your family to K-Mart to see a movie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today, if you meet someone from France, they will say, "Bonjour, Je suis de la France." This is what they would say if America knew France wasn''t going to pay us back for helping them. "Hallo, bin ich von Frankreich."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, looking at the old pages as he turned them. Then something fell out, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree, that had been pressed between the pages. "Momma, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. With astonishment in the his voice, he answered, "It''s Adam''s Suit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Six-year old Angie and her four-year old brother, Joel, were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had enough. "You''re not supposed to talk out loud in church." "Why? Who''s going to stop me?" Joel asked. Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door? They''re hushers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack was living in Arizona, during a heat wave, when the following took place. "It''s just too hot to wear clothes today," complained Jack, as he stepped out of the shower. "Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?" "Probably that I married you for your money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sheri, the pert and pretty nurse, took her troubles to a resident psychiatrist in the hospital where she worked. "Doctor, you must help me," she pleaded. "It''s gotten so that every time I meet one of the young doctors here, I end up dating him. And then afterward, I feel guilty and depressed for a week." "I see," nodded the psychiatrist. "And you, no doubt, want me to strengthen your will power and resolve in this matter." "NO!!!" exclaimed the nurse. "I want you to fix it so I won''t feel guilty and depressed afterward!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship. BEER: It''s not just for breakfast anymore. So you''re a feminist...Isn''t that cute. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. All men are idiots....I married their king. IRS: We''ve got what it takes to take what you''ve got. Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now. Reality is a crutch for people who can''t handle drugs. Out of my mind...Back in five minutes. I took an IQ test and the results were negative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A first-time father was taking a turn at feeding the baby some strained peas. Naturally, there were traces of the food everywhere, especially on the infant. His wife comes in, looks at the infant, then at her husband staring into space, then says, "What in the world are you doing?" He replied, "I''m waiting for the first coat to dry, so I can put on another."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A computer teacher who doesn''t speak good english tells his student "Paul open the window let the Air Force Come." At another time the same teacher and his wife sees one of his students in mall. The next day the teacher says to the student "Tim, yesterday I saw you with my wife at the mall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why were the British fighting us in the war of 1812? A: Because they were done beating up the French, and they needed someone new to pick on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many drummers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5... 1 to try and fail, 3 to stand around and pretend to be musicians, and 1 to actually do it right. How many trumpet players does it take to screw in a light bulb? 3... 1 to do it, and 2 to say they can do it better. How many tuba players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2... 1 to crush the lightbulb, and the other to fight about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do scientists use to freshen their breath? Experi-mints', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path? Tyrannosaurus wrecks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your kids are named after the car they were made in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a three legged dog walked into a bar. He said, "I''m looking for the guy that shot my paw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The British had an organization that Americans are now considering adopting. It seems that in England, they had a men''s club, Bachelors'' Anonymous. It was highly successful in making men fear or even hate marriage. The club provided a unique way to treat the problem of bachelors wanting to marry. They send over a mother-in-law in nightgown, hair curlers, and a mud pack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A famous professor of surgery died and went to heaven. At the pearly gate he was asked by the gatekeeper: ''Have you ever committed a sin you truly regret?'' ''Yes,'' the professor ansvered. ''When I was a young candidate at the hospital of Saint Lucas, we played soccer against at team from the Community Hospital, and I scored a goal, which was off-side. But the referee did not see it so, and the goal won us the match. I regret that now.'' ''Well,'' said the gatekeeper. ''That is a very minor sin. You may enter.'' ''Thank you very much, Saint Peter,'' the professor ansvered. ''I am not Saint Peter,'' said the gatekeeper. ''He is having his lunchbreak. I am Saint Lucas.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. The only things more accurate than enemy fire is friendly fire. 2. Teamwork is essential. It gives them more targets to shoot at. 3. No inspection-ready unit ever passed combat. 4. No combat-ready unit ever passed inspection. 5. Remember: your aircraft was made by the lowest bidder. 6. Never share a cockpit with someone braver than you. 7. You are not Tom Cruise. 8. SAMs and AAA have the right-of-way. 9. If you aren''t sure, the SAMs are pointed at you. 10. If hit, landing near the people that just shot you down is not a good idea. 11. Close only counts in horseshoes, nukes and proximity-fused missiles. 12. Smart bombs have bad days too. 13. The best defense is to stay out of range. 14. If you are short on everything but enemy, you are in combat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are out hunting deer. The first guy says, "Did you see that?" "No," the second guy says. "Well, a bald eagle just flew overhead," the first guy says. "Oh," says the second guy. A couple of minutes later, the first guy says, "Did you see that?" "See what?" the second guy asks. "Are you blind? There was a big, black bear walking on that hill, over there." "Oh." A few minutes later the first guy says: "Did you see that?" By now, the second guy is getting aggravated, so he says, "Yes, I did!" And the first guy says: "Then why did you step in it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Egotistical Harry was always reminding people that he played semi-pro baseball. "I was the James Bond type of player," he told his friends. "I had all sorts of tricks to confuse the opposition." "Batted .007," his wife added.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve never understood why women love cats. Cats are independent, they don''t listen, they don''t come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they''re home they like to be left alone and sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young college co-ed came running in tears to her father. "Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!" "I did? What did I tell you?" said the dad. "You told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that big bank is in trouble." "What are you talking about? That''s one of the largest banks in the state," he said. "there must be some mistake." "I don''t think so," she sniffed. "They just returned one of my checks with a note saying, ''Insufficient Funds''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of my daughter''s wedding presents was a toaster oven. Soon after the honeymoon, she and her husband tried it out. Almost immediately, smoke billowed out of the toaster. "Get the owner''s manual!" her husband shouted. "I can''t find it anywhere!" she cried, searching through the box. "Oops!" came a voice from the kitchen. "Well, the toast is fine, but the owner''s manual is burnt to a crisp."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a Mechanical Engineer, Electrical Engineer, Chemical Engineer and Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car. The car broke down. The Mechanical Engineer said, "I think a rod broke." The Chemical Engineer said, "The way it sputtered at the end, I don''t think it''s getting gas." The Electrical Engineer said, "I think there was a spark and something is wrong with the electrical system." All three turned to the computer engineer and said, "What do you think?" The Computer Engineer said, "I think we should all get out and get back in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Bobby was spending the weekend with his grandmother, after a particularly trying week in kindergarten. His grandmother decided to take him to the park on Saturday morning. It had been snowing all night, and everything was beautiful. His grandmother remarked,"Doesn''t it look like an artist painted this scenery? Did you know God painted this just for you?" Bobby said, "Yes, God did it and he did it left handed." This confused his grandmother a bit, and she asked him, "What makes you say God did this with his left hand?" Well," said Bobby, "we learned at Sunday School last week that Jesus sits on God''s right hand!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend''s husband always teases her about her lack of interest in household chores. One day he came home with a gag gift, a refrigerator magnet, that read: "Martha Stewart doesn''t live here." The next day he came home to find the magnet holding up a slip of paper. The note read, "Neither does Bob Vila."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a radio station, everyone can turn her on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross a rhino and and elephant? Elepf-ino (pronounced "Hell if I know")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once asked a foreign person if i could bang on his drum, he told me, "You can''t bang on my drum, but you can bang on my bum!" -If this ever happens to you, run!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman caught a nasty little boy, with a penknife in one hand and a squirrel in the other. "Now listen here," the policeman said. "Whatever you do to that poor, defenseless creature, I shall personally do to you" "In that case," said the boy, "I''ll kiss it on the forehead and let it go"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. He walks up to the bar and takes a seat. The giraffe does the same. The man orders a beer for himself, and a double scotch for the giraffe. They both proceed to drink, and, after a while, they order the same again. They continue all night, ordering the same drinks, drinking them, and ordering another load, untill suddenly, the giraffe falls off his stool, and lies unconscious on the floor. The man gets up of his stool and heads for the door. The barman shouts at him as he heads out the door "You can''t leave that lyin'' ''ere!" The man replies, "Its not a lion, its a giraffe!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know, luckily they have this fraud protection thing going around. It''s supposed to save your butt if it''s happened to you. Capital one has it, Visa, Master Card, etc. If they notice some unusual activity, they''ll give you a call like this: "Hi, this is Capital One calling. We''ve noticed a lot of unusual activity on your account the past couple of days, and we were just wondering if you''ve lost your card." Have you ever got a call like that? It could save your credit. That practice seemed like a good idea, and, apparently, it''s being used by everyone. But I don''t think I could have prepared myself when I got a call last sunday afternoon that went like this: "Hi, this is Heaven calling. We''ve noticed a lot of unusual activity coming from you these past couple of days, and we were just wondering if you''ve lost your mind." Well, apparently, by saying yes, I saved my soul. (But off the record, it was one hell of a weekend :-D :-D )', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it, but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him. He dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin, as fast as he could. He ran pretty fast, but the bear was just a little faster, and gained on him with every step. Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat. Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin. The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is an old story about the data centre of the future. This data centre runs 24/7 with only a man and a dog. The man''s job is to feed the dog. The dog''s job is to make sure the man does not touch the computer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John, for heaven''s sake, why can''t you just talk to me once in awhile?" whined Mari. "Huh?" John responded. "Look around you!" she yells, as she points around the room. "All these books. Your head is always buried in books. You don''t even know I''m alive!" "Oh. I''m sorry." "You know, sometimes I wish I were a book. Then you''d at least look at me." "Hmmm," John mumbled in deep thought, "that''s not a bad idea. Then I could take you to the library every few days and change you for something more interesting."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man and his wife were lying in bed and she was complaining that his penis was small and asked why he didn''t do something about it. The next night thay were in bed and she reached between his legs and gasped, "How did it get so big?" Husband said, "Simple, I went to the hospital and had an operation." The wife replied, "What kind of operation?" The husband said, "I had an addadicktome!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your limo at your wedding was a tractor and trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your honeymoon was at the family farm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The king had a powerful army. He reined for 7 years before clearing the clouds!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My computer is so old, it has a VHS slot instead of a CD/DVD slot!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... ...your porch collapses and kills more than 3 dogs. ...you see your family reunion as a way to meet girls. ...you marry three times and still have the same in-laws.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Both of the following men have cheated on their wives and have decided to take it to the Lord. One is a gangster and one is a Christian. This is their prayers.... Christian husband: Dear Father Son and Holy Ghost, I have sinned and am so sorry. I cheated on my wife with her best friend. Please allow my wife to forgive me for it was a long night and I didn''t mean to hurt her. Amen Gangster husband: Waz up Pops Pops Jr. and Spooks, I cheated on my women last night. She is pissed off but I have a good reason for my actions. You see I''m a pimp in my old town and one of my leading ladies was having some trouble so you know, Lil'' Willy down there make it all better. Well, my woman found out so you know let this blow over. Gangster out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell the difference between a violin and a fiddle? Look at the audience!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went into his shrink''s office and says, "Doc, you have got to help me! Every night I keep dreaming that I''m a sports car. "The other night I dreamed I was a Ferrari. Another night I dreamed I was a BMW. Last night I dreamed I was a Porsche. What does this mean?" "Relax," says the doctor; "you''re just having an auto-body experience."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was a new Army basic trainee at Fort McClellan, and one requirement was a demanding 12-mile march. We got started at 6 a.m. and were pumped up for the trek. An hour later, feeling the heavy load of our packs, we wondered if the end would ever come. "Men," our sergeant yelled, "you''re doing a fine job. We''ve already covered four miles!" Revitalized, we picked up the pace. "And," he continued, "we should reach the starting point any minute now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After intensive investigation on both the Soviet and US parts, spokespersons from both space agencies have determined the cause for the accident which has placed the station and its resident personnel in jeopardy. In terse statements at a recent press conference, Soviet and US space agency spokespersons said Thursday We have concluded joint investigations concerning this potentially tragic accident and each nations'' team, separately, has arrived at identical conclusions for this incident. The accident was caused by one thing and one thing only: OBJECTS IN MIR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were driving down a country lane on their way to visit some friends. They came to a muddy patch in the road and the car became bogged. After a few minutes of trying to get the car out by themselves, they saw a young farmer coming down the lane, driving some oxen before him. The farmer stopped when he saw the couple in trouble and offered to pull the car out of the mud for $50. The husband accepted and minutes later the car was free. The farmer turned to the husband and said, "You know, you''re the tenth car I''ve helped out of the mud today." The husband looks around at the fields incredulously and asks the farmer, "When do you have time to plough your land? At night?" "No," the young farmer replied seriously, "Night is when I put the water in the hole."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fellow was very much in love with a beautiful girl. One day she told him that the next day was her birthday. He told her he would send her a bouquet of roses, one for each year of her life. That evening he called the local florist and ordered twenty-one roses with instructions that they be delivered first thing the next morning. As the florist was preparing the order, he decided that since the young man was such a good customer, he would put an extra dozen roses in the bouquet. The fellow never did find out what made the young girl so angry with him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A retiring farmer in preparation for selling his land, needed to rid his farm of animals. So he went to every house in his town. To the houses where the man is the boss, he gave a horse. To the houses where the woman is the boss, a chicken was given. He got toward the end of the street and saw a couple outside gardening. "Who''s the boss around here?" he asked. "I am." said the man. "I have a black horse and a brown horse," the farmer said, "which one would you like?" The man thought for a minute and said, "The black one." "No, no, no, get the brown one." the man''s wife said. "Here''s your chicken." said the farmer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For weeks a six-year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house. One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements of the unborn child. The six-year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacher about the impending event. The teacher finally sat the boy on her lap and said, "Tommy, whatever has become of that baby brother or sister you were expecting at home?" Tommy burst into tears and confessed, "I think Mommy ate it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hello, this is probably 327-4681, yes, the house of the famous statistician. I''m probably not at home, or not wanting to answer the phone, most probably the latter, according to my latest calculations. Supposing that the universe doesn''t end in the next 30 seconds, the odds of which I''m still trying to calculate, you can leave your name, phone number, and message, and I''ll probably phone you back. So far the probability of that is about 0.645. Have a nice day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: I''m in a hospital! Why am I in here? Doctor: You''ve had an accident involving a train. Patient: What happened? Doctor: Well, I''ve got some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first? Patient: Well... The bad news first... Doctor: Your legs were injured so badly that we had to amputate both of them. Patient: That''s terrible! What''s the good news? Doctor: There''s a guy in the next ward who made a very good offer on your slippers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four married guys go golfing on Sunday. During the 3rd hole the following conversation ensued: First Guy: "Man, you have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out golfing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend." Second Guy: "That''s nothing, I had to promise my wife that I will build her a new deck for the pool." Third Guy: "Man, you both have it easy! I had to promise my wife that I will remodel the kitchen for her." They continue to play the hole when they realized that the fourth guy has not said a word. So they ask him. "You haven''t said anything about what you had to do to be able to come golfing this weekend. What''s the deal?" Fourth Guy: "I don''t want to talk about it. Let''s just say that the foundation for the new house is being poured next Tuesday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob was propped up against a palm tree and acting so calmly it drove Joe crazy. "Don''t you understand?!? We''re going to die!!" Bob replied, "You don''t understand, I make $100,000 a week." Joe looked at him quite dumbfounded and asked, "What difference does that make?!? We''re on an island with no food and no water! We''re going to DIE!!!" Bob answered, "You just don''t get it. I make $100,000 a week and I tithe ten percent on that $100,000 a week. My pastor will find me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bet that India would win against Pakistan and lost Rs 1,000. Tommy told Rob. "Hey, you bet Rs 1,000 for a single match?" Rob exclaimed. "No Man, I bet Rs 500 on that match." Tommy replied. "So, what happened to the other Rs 500?" Rob asked. "My Friend, I bet on the highlights too." Tommy replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a guy who liked cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like hippos ''cause they''re fat and don''t care what other hippos think.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde decides to do something wild she hasn''t done before, so she sets out to rent her first x-rated adult video. She goes to the video store and, after looking around for a while, selects a title that sounds very stimulating. When she arrives home, lights some candles, slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape into the VCR. To her disappointment, there''s nothing but static on the screen, so she calls the video store to complain. "I just rented an adult movie from you and there''s nothing on the tape but static." "Sorry about, that," replied the store clerk. "We''ve had problems with some of those tapes. Which title did you rent?" The blonde replied, "It''s called ''Head Cleaner.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonds are so dumb. I''m lucky my hair is yellow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she stepped on a peanut and she made peanut butter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she''s stupid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was an old man 70 years old named Bob who was married to his 73 year old wife, Mary. They had their grandchild, named Caroline over. Once they got home from their walk, Bob offered Caroline some hot chocolate, toast, and eggs. "Of course!" She said with delight. Then, Bob goes in to make the meal for Caroline and Mary follows to help. Bob and Mary take an hour to walk into the kitchen, take three hours making the meal, and take an hour to walk back into the living room in which Caroline was in with the meal. Caroline noticed, "Hey, you forgot the Hot chocolate and toast!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again." To which the gentleman said, "Oh, I haven''t told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I''ve changed my will three times!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are trying to set up a fenced-in area for some sheep, but they have a limited amount of building material. The engineer gets up first and makes a square fence with the material, reasoning that it''s a pretty good working solution. "No no," says the physicist, "there''s a better way." He takes the fence and makes a circular pen, showing how it encompasses the maximum possible space with the given material. Then the mathematician speaks up: "No, no, there''s an even better way." To the others'' amusement he proceeds to construct a little tiny fence around himself, then declares: "I define myself to be on the outside."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening after work, a man drove his secretary home after she had a little too much to drink at a party. Although nothing happened, he decided not to mention it to his wife. Later that night, the man and his wife were driving to a movie when he spotted a high-heeled shoe hidden under the passenger seat. Pointing to something out the passenger window to distract his wife, he picked up the shoe and tossed it out of his window. They arrived at the theater a short time later and were about to get out of the car when his wife asked, "Honey, have you seen my other shoe?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk. So the bartender says to another man in the bar: "Why don''t you be a good samaritan and take him home." The man takes the drunk out the door, and to his car, and he stumbles at least ten times. They drive along and the drunk points out his house to the man. He stops the car, and the drunk stumbles up the steps to his house with the man. The drunk''s wife greets them at the door: "Why thank you for bringing him home for me, but where''s his wheel chair?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!!!................................ its funny cause the robot doesnt have any legs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('somewhere in Calfornia, USA, there is a man who want to open up a business. So he decided to build a restaurant. On the grand opening day, he put a large sign: "BEST RESTAURANT IN CALIFORNIA". And there''s another man do the same thing (make a new restaurant) close to the first man. He put a big sign: "BEST RESTAURANT IN AMERICA" There''s another man also do the same thing. He''s even more arrogant than the first two. He then put a big sign: "BEST RESTAURANT IN THE WORLD" ANOTHER man decided to do the same thing. But this man is wiser than the first three. So instead of put a bombastic sign, he only put a normal sign in front of his new restaurant: "Best Restaurant on this road"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never trust google! why? follow the instruction below and you''ll get what I mean Please do it right now and see the blunder made by google. 1. Open google 2. Click ''language tools'' link. 3. Write "Linda''s mom is very nice" in ''Translate text:'' textbox. 4. Select "English to Spanish" in the below combo. 5. Press Translate and wait for translation. 6. Now copy the translated text from the above text and paste it in the ''Translate text:'' textbox. 7. Select "Spanish to English" in the below combo. 8. Press Translate and wait for translation. 9. Enjoy. Copy paste below''s URL to go to translator page of google: http://www.google.com/language_tools?hl=en', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asked to his girl friends: What does a gay cow eat? all of his friends failed to answer. Then he stood up, and with a gay-est falsetto voice he said: Haaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new Ensign was assigned to subs, where he''d dreamed of working since a young boy. He was trying to impress the Master Chief with his expertise learned in Submarine School. The Master Chief cut him off quickly and said, "Listen, ''sir'', it''s real simple. Add the number of times we dive to the number of times we surface. Divide that number by two. If the result doesn''t come out even, don''t open the hatch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from an exclusive jewelry store. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don''t want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch, and we forget about this?" The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend. Can you show me something less expensive?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oh, the network outside is frightful, But on campus, it''s so delightful, Our packets have nowhere to go, Net is slow, net is slow, net is slow. It doesn''t show signs of stopping, All our packets, our hosts are dropping; Bandwidth is turned way down low, Net is slow, net is slow, net is slow. When we finally connect to a site, It''s time to go back to the dorm; But if I could stay here all night, I could submit their Web form. The network is slowly dying, And, I fear, we''re still denying, But as long as Sprint is the way to go, Net is slow, net is slow, net is slow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice. The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy." The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy''s nervousness builds. He remembers his father''s advice, and chooses the first topic. He asks the girl: "Do you like spinach?" She says "No," and the silence returns. After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father''s suggestion and turns to the second item on the list. He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again. The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father''s advice and asks the girl the following question: "If you had a brother, would he like spinach?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you here about the giant with a nosebleed? It was all over town', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy went to his grandpa''s & grandma''s house. He asked his grandpa, while his hand holds a worm, "If I can make this worm stiff, would you give me $10?" His grandpa said, "Yes." Then he sprayed the worm with hair spray, and the worm became stiff. The grandpa looked surprised. He then tells his wife about what happened, and together, they give the boy $20. Grandma then said, "Here''s $10 from grandpa for making the worm stiff, as he promised, and $10 from me for the great idea."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a Polish man and an American on the street corner. The American man wanted to see if the Polish really were stupid. The Polish man replied, "No, you stupid American, we are not." The American then puts his hand in front of a metal pole, and tells the Polish man, he''s sorry to hit him for it. When he goes to hit him, the American moves his hand, leaving the Polish man crying. The Polish man then puts his hand in front of his face and says, "What now?" The Polish man went to the hospital. The entire time he was there, he insisted he screw the room lightbulb in himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your dog is in your bed more than your wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Kook Kook who? Hey, who you calling cukoo mister?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a cock always close his eyes when he''s crowing? Because he already knows the text!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the similarity between Einstein and Newton? Neither of them ever had a mobile phone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do pigs STINK? Because they have four armpits..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What door cannot be pushed, even by 10 people simultaneously? The door that says: PULL', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college student walks down the road when he sees a beggar on the side of the street. College Student (C) : Hey mister! whatsup! Beggar (B) : Yea how you doin''... C: So, how long have you''ve been a beggar? B: It''s about eight years now kid.. C: WOW! Thats long time.. how much do you get per day? B: Not that bad... about 250 bucks a day... C: That''s enermous! B: Yeah.. Enough for living my family.. C: Owch.. you got family too! Where are they now? B: My wife''s dead. I got three children, one of them in Harvard University, one in MIT, and the other one went oversea, he goes to Oxford University... C: *pause, surprised* That''s..that''s really great... So, when they''re gonna be graduated? B: No kid... they''re not studying! They beg in there! just like me!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER : There is a frog, ship is sinking, potatoes cost $10/kg, then what is my age? STUDENT : 32 yrs! TEACHER : How do you know? STUDENT : Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You fart and you are proud of the smell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Make sure you are in a public place with a lot of people around. Sniff the air a couple of times (make sure it is loud sniffs). Turn to you wife and say in a loud voice "Hey honey did you fart?!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so uncoordinated she couldn''t hit water if she fell out of a boat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas is so fat it takes a twinky and a tub of butter to get her through the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know we all have those moments and I''m going to share a few of them with you. At lunch I was going crazy looking for my purse. It was literally right in front of me...on the table. My friend across from me suddenly said "Where''s Tina?" She was sitting right next to her. I was having a conversation with my friend on the bus and five seconds later I couldn''t remember what it was about. I still can''t Maybe it was about bread.... When people lose their cell phones why don''t they just call them? Even if they''re on vibrate you can still hear them a little bit..... At work I''m constantly trying to give change in dimes instead of just using a quarter....I know not that bad but yea. I had to call home once and I fergot my own phone number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a dog with no hind legs and metal balls? A: Sparky!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind guy, a deaf guy, and an armless guy were in a cave. All of a sudden, a blind guy said he heard something, the deaf guy said he saw something, and the armless guy said "Let''s kick his ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the neurologist yesterday, to find out if I still needed to take my medication, right? Well, he goes off on a random tangent about Hershey Park and I''m like, what the heck, I thought this was about me, not a theme park. And so, somehow, he decides that I need to take two pills instead of one, and again, I''m like what the heck, this guy is nuts! And then after he decides this, he randomly decides to check the reflexes in my elbows and my knees and my ankles. I am laughing uncontrollably and my moms looked at me like I was nuts - I still don''t know what my reflexes have to do with my migraines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: How long is a minute? Answer: That depends on which side of the bathroom door you are on!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do snakes use for birth control? An Anacondom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: Is your dad a baker? Girl: No. Why? Boy: Cause you''re a cutie pie!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s just like a bus. They''re big, smelly, and you can ride it for a buck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Lower corner of screen has the words "Etch-a-sketch" on it. 9. Its celebrity spokesman is that "Hey Vern!" guy. 8. In order to start it, you need some jumper cables and a friend''s car. 7. Its slogan is "Pentium: redefining mathematics". 6. The "quick reference" manual is 120 pages long. 5. Whenever you turn it on, all the dogs in your neighborhood start howling. 4. The screen often displays the message, "Ain''t it break time yet?" 3. The manual contains only one sentence: "Good Luck!" 2. The only chip inside is a Dorito. 1. You''ve decided that your computer is an excellent addition to your fabulous paperweight collection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you seen the current remake of the movie "Cape Fear?" It''s about a deranged psychotic who is seeking revenge against a lawyer. The question is, while watching the movie, for whom do you root?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Potatoes are standing on a street corner. How do you know which one is a hooker? It''s the one stamped I-da-Ho (Idaho potato)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 10999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy is walking down the street with his friend. He says to his friend, "I''m a walking economy." His friend replies, "How''s that?" "It''s like this -- my hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and the combination of these factors is putting me into a deep depression."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Morning sickness would rank as the nation''s number one health problem. 2. Maternity leave would last for two years with full pay. 3. Children would be kept in the hospital until toilet trained. 4. Natural childbirth would become obsolete. 5. All methods of birth control would become 100% effective. 6. Men would be eager to talk about commitment. 7. There would be a cure for stretch marks. 8. They would serve beer instead of coffee at antenatal classes. 9. Men wouldn''t think twins were so cute. 10. Sons would have to come home from dates by 9 pm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am not a believer in seances, but I went to one just to see what they are like. The psychic was doing his thing and grinning from ear to ear. I assumed his merriment was due to the fact that he was fooling a gullible public and gave him a poke in the nose. You can probably guess the rest. I was arrested for striking a happy medium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter. Mother: "What does the cow say?" Child: "Moo!" Mother: "Great! What does the cat say?" Child: "Meow." Mother: "Oh, you''re so smart! What does the frog say?" And this wide-eyed little 3 year-old looked up at her mother and in her deepest voice replied, "Bud."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me two shots." Bartender says, "You want them both now or one at a time?" The guy says," Oh, I want them both now. One''s for me and one''s for this little guy here," and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of his pocket. The bartender asks "He can drink?" "Oh, sure. He can drink." So the bartender pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up. "That''s amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can he walk?" The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says, "Hey, Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to the end of the bar and picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down and gives it to the man. The bartender is in total shock. "That''s amazing" he says, "what else can he do? Does he talk?" The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time we were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor''s powers!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A unit of soldiers was marching a long dusty march across the rolling prairie. It was a blisteringly hot day and the men, longing for water and rest, were impatient to reach the next town. A rancher rode past. "Say, friend," called out one of the men, "how far is it to the next town?" "Oh, a matter of two miles or so, I reckon," called back the rancher. Another long hour dragged by, and another rancher was encountered. "How far to the next town?" the men asked him eagerly. "Oh, a good two miles." A nearly half hour longer of marching, and then a third rancher. "Hey, how far''s the next town?" "Not far," was the encouraging answer, "only about two miles." "Well," sighed the optimistic sergeant, "thank God, we''re holding our own, anyhow!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma''s so fat, her blood type is rocky road.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes into a diner, and when the waitress comes over to take his order, he says, "I want eggs, toast, and coffee. But make the eggs uncooked, the toast burnt, and the coffee really strong and bad. And I want you to slam the food onto the table and yell at me." The waitress says "Why would you want me to something like that?" He replies, "I''m homesick."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where do nudists go fishing? A: Moon River. Q: What do you call a singing hot dog in New York, New York? A: Frank Sinatra. Q: What do you call a really smart cow? A: Grade A beef. Q: What song do they play at plumbers'' funerals? A: Taps. Q: Where do you take a sick potato? A: To a M.A.S.H. unit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Their was a very rich old lady that died.Before she died she gave all her money and stuff to her children and grandchildren. She had one thing left to give out. It was a diamond. She said she hid it in a cylinder with squares. A grandchild said he knew where it was. Where was it???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Procrastinators meeting tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma''s so fat, when she went to the zoo elephants called her mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to work and kills everyone...what is this called...? Going Postal...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I AM WRITING IN CAPITAL LETTERS BECAUSE IT MAKES IT SEEM LIKE I AM YELLING IN YOUR HEAD AND I LIKE THE IDEA OF YELLING IN YOUR HEAD. IT MAKES ME FEEL POWERFUL!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Dodgers and the children in the neighbourhood are raking leaves at Mr. Dodger''s house. They have three piles of leaves in the back yard, and seven piles of leaves in the front yard. When Mr. Dodgers and the children put all the piles together, how many piles of leaves will they have? JUST ONE BIG PILE!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. "What''s going on?" she yells out the window. "Cow on the track!" replies the conductor. Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it stops again. The woman sees the same conductor walk again. She leans out the window and yells, "What happened? Did we catch up with the cow again?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is your dad a baker? Because those buns are lookin'' good! I lost my phone number, can I have yours?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When our lawn mower broke and wouldn''t run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck, the car, fishing, always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a few minutes. When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. "When you finish cutting the grass," I said, "you might as well sweep the sidewalk." The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rusty Bed Spings by I.P Nitely "Fell off a Cliff" By Ilene Dover "Bounce of a Brick Wall" by Rick O''Shey "Mini Skirts" by Seymour Buttz "Race to the Outhouse" By Willie Makit" and last but not least "Guide to One Night Stands" by Juan Teboneya"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man who had been in a depressed state for months. His dog that he''d had since childhood ran away, his fianc ran off the day before their wedding with a woman, he was working a job that was totally unfulfilling, and his house was robbed and his most valuable possesions were plundered. One day, he decided to just end his meaningless existence. He wished to kill himself in the most painful way he could think of. That night, he drove to the zoo, which was closed at that time. The guy simply climbed over the gate at the entrance, unknowingly alerting the half-drunk security officer who was sitting in the ticket window. The man walked over and found the pit where the vicious lions resided. He stood on the edge of the pit and prepared to jump. Before he could, the security officer from before arrived with back-up. He raised his gun and shouted, "Stop, or we''ll shoot!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My cat is crazy. I had just sat down to eat my hot dog when she jumped in my lap. She scared the crap out of me. I mean, I literally screamed. Then I''m like, "Whatever." and I went back to my hot dog. Then I felt something sharp on my fingers. That stupid thing was biting me! Poor thing just wanted some food.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby so he went before the congregation and asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher''s family expanded, so would his paycheck. After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the Congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher''s salary. There was much yelling and bickering about how much the preacher''s additional children were costing the church. Finally, the Preacher got up and spoke to the crowd, "Children are a gift from God," he said. Silence fell on the congregation. In the back pew, a little old lady stood up and in her frail voice said, "Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers." And the congregation said, "Amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a group of soldiers stood in formation at an Army Base, the Drill Sergeant said, "All right! All you idiots fall out." As the rest of the squad wandered away, one soldier remained at attention. The Drill Instructor walked over until he was eye-to-eye with him, and then raised a single eyebrow. The soldier smiled and said, "Sure was a lot of ''em, huh, sir?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Platoon Sergeant and his Platoon Leader are bunking down in the field for the night. The Platoon Sergeant looks up and says, "When you see all the stars in the sky, what do you think, sir?" The LT replies, "Well, I think of how insignificant we really are in the universe; how small a piece of such a grand design. I can''t help but wonder if what we do truly means anything or makes any difference. Why? What do you think of, Sergeant?" "I think somebody stole the damn tent."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Well, snarled the tough old Navy Chief to the bewildered Seaman. "I suppose after you get discharged from the Navy, you''ll just be waiting for me to die so you can come and piss on my grave." "Not me, Chief!" the Seaman replied. "Once I get out of the Navy, I''m never going to stand in line again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At one Army base, the annual trip to the rifle range had been cancelled for the second year in a row, but the semi-annual physical fitness test was still on as planned. One soldier mused, "Does it bother anyone else that the Army doesn''t seem to care how well we can shoot, but they are extremely interested in how fast we can run?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The reason the Air Force, Army, Navy and Marines bicker amongst themselves is that they don''t speak the same language. For instance, take the simple phrase "secure the building". The Army will post guards around the place. The Navy will turn out the lights and lock the doors. The Marines will kill everybody inside and set up a headquarters The Air Force will take out a 5 year lease with an option to buy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Army grunt stands in the rain with a 15 kg. pack on his back, 5 kg. weapon in hand, after having marched 15 km, and says, "This sucks." An Army Airborne Ranger stands waist deep in the rain with a 25 kg. pack on his back, weapon in hand, after having jumped from an airplane and marched 30 km, and says with a smile, "This sucks just fine!" A Special Forces soldier lies in the mud, 40 kg pack on his back, weapon in hand, after swimming 10 km to shore, crawling through a swamp and marching 40 km at night past the enemy positions, says with a grin, while biting the head of a snake "This really sucks, I wish it could suck more....." An Air Force Pilot flying over the battlefield, the rain is pouring down, looks down at the soldiers below and says: "Sure sucks down there!" An Air Force officer sits in an easy chair in his air conditioned, carpeted room and says to his friend, "Man.. Cable''s out! This sucks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Irish! Irish who? Irish I could think of a better joke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde was surfing the internet. After a few hours, she decided to have a coffee break. When the blonde came back, she screamed. There was a bug on her moniter! She ran upstairs and grabbed a fly swatter. When she came back down she couldn''t swat the bug. It was to big! The blonde then remembered the label on the computer, for people having technical difficulties. After a while of searching, she found the label. She called the number immediately. "Hello, this is Dell technical difficulties station", a man on the other side said. "Hey, there''s a bug on my monitor, and I tried swatting it, but it won''t come off!" The blonde cried. The man replied, "Well, the solution is simple. You take the mou-" "A mouse won''t eat a bug this big!" the blonde said, cutting the man off. "No, no, no! All you have to do is move the mouse, then the screen saver will turn off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rose, a mother of two boys, Jim and Ralph, heard yelling from upstairs. She heard several phrases like "I got you!" and "No, you didn''t!" She ran to see what the yelling was about. It ended up that the two boys were playing cops and robbers, and were trying to shoot each other with their fingers. "Jim! Haven''t I taught you not to point! Fake guns are no excuse!" "...But mum!" Jim replied after a short pause, "I''m giving him the thumbs up, too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve ever bought a birthday present out of a vending machine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a Redneck if..... 1. Your child''s night-light is a neon beer sign. 2. The only running water in your house comes through the ceiling. 3. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. 4. All your kids toys came free with a Happy Meal. 5. When you fill your car with gas, it''s worth doubles. 6. You start a fight in a bar and your wife finishes it. 7. Your kids favourite bedtime story is "Curious George and the Electric fence" 8. You and your wife''s family reunions are one and the same. 9. The Glamour Shots people give you your money back. and last of all.... You know you''re a redneck if 10.The FBI has more pictures of your family than you do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a legal heir to a fireworks stand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Local cops know you by your nickname.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You get homesick watching cops on TV.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother does not remove the Marlboro from her mouth before telling the state patrolman to kiss her ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your parrot can say, "Open up, it''s the police!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You used a cheat sheet during your hunter''s safety test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your current wife was a bridesmaid at your first wedding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sing this to the tune of "On top of old oaky from "That''s so Raven". On top of Mount Fuji, All covered in blood, I shot poor Barney With a 45 stud. He went to the hospital. He wasn''t quite dead. So I took a machine gun, And blew off his head I went to his funeral. I went to his grave. Some people threw flowers, But i threw a grenade TaDa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(Not for Muffin Man luvers) Do you know the muffin man, the muffin man, the muffin man? Do you know the muffin man who lives on Dreary lane? I just shot the muffin man, the mufifn man, the muffin man. I just shot the muffin man who lives on Dreary Lane. I shot him with a 20 gauge, a 20 gauge, a 20 gauge I shot him with a 20 gauge, and now he''s dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, in a hospital, a doctor walked into a womans room, looking very serious. "There''s something wrong with your baby", he said. the woman bolted upright. "Tell me! What''s wrong with my baby?" The doctor looked her straight in the eye and told her, "Your child is a hermaphrodite." "A herma-whatta?" she asked. "The baby has the, um, most important parts of both a boy and a girl." The woman turned pale. It was silent for a few moments, and she said, "So, you''re saying its a guy with a brain?!?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get why we teach little kids the popular saying "Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye." And we wonder what is with all the violence? I mean come on that''s like 100% emo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This couple, my mom is friends with at work, just had a baby. The wife, Emily, told Dave, her husband, there needed to be some cutbacks on beer to save money for diapers and such. Dave was very disapointed, as could be imagined, but realized it was for the good of their child. One afternoon Emily walks through the door, with bags of makeup and pretty clothes. Dave politely asked Emily why she was spending money on cosmetics, and he was restricted from beer. She responded causually, "This is for you honey. It makes me pretty." Naturally, Dave responded, "That''s what the beer was for." Since then, he has been kicked out of the house, and lives in our basement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('50 Fahrenheit (10 C) Californians shiver uncontrollably. Canadians plant gardens. 35 Fahrenheit (1.6 C) - Italian Cars won''t start. Canadians drive withthe windows down. 32 Fahrenheit (0 C) American water freezes. Canadian water gets thicker. 0 Fahrenheit (-17.9 C) New York City landlords finally turn on the heat. Canadians have the last cookout of the season -60 Fahrenheit (-51 C) Mt. St. Helens freezes. Canadian Girl Guides sell cookies door-to-door. -100 Fahrenheit (-73 C) Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Canadianspull down their ear flaps. -173 Fahrenheit (-114 C) Ethyl alcohol Freezes. Canadians get frustrated when they can''t thaw the keg. -460 Fahrenheit (-273 C) Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops. Canadians start saying "cold, eh?" -500 Fahrenhei t (-295 C) Hell freezes over. The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You think "Going the extra mile" means using toothpaste. You take a bar of soap to your local pool. Your dentures have fillings. Your idea of conservation is moving your Saturday night bath to every other Saturday night. Your wife has ever burnt out an electric razor. Your medical plan is not to get sick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your a redneck if... You tell your kids the facts of life and they interrupt you with corrections. You''ve ever given your date flowers from a cemetery. You proposed at Denny''s. The biggest compliment you got at your wedding was how cute your baby was. You had a marriage license before you had a drivers license. You''ve ever reused wedding invitations. The last thing your ex-wife ever said to you was "It''s me or them dogs." If your wedding invitations ever said "same time same place." At your wedding reception you put Alka-Seltzer in cheap wine to get "Champagne."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an insult you could say "You know, most of you weight comes from all that make-up your wearing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are two pick up lines: "Are you a Abercrombie model? Your not?!?!? You so should be!!" or "My friend (insert friend name here) thinks we should go out. Wanna?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Birdie Birdie in the sky, Dropped some white stuff in my eye. I''m a big girl, I won''t cry. I''m just glad that cows don''t fly!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blond and her male co-worker are sitting in the lunch room, and the guy says, "I can''t take anymore today, I am going home!" The blond replies, "You can''t just get up and leave. You''ll be fired!". "Not to worry, I am going to be sent home. I have an idea." the guy says and leaves the room. The blond finishes her lunch and heads back into work, to see her co-worker hanging upside down from the ceiling, yelling over and over, "I''m a lightbulb!". The owner hears this and comes down. He takes one look at the guy, hanging upside down, yelling he is a lightbulb, and sends him home for the rest of the day, with pay, so he can rest, because he has obviously been working to hard. The guy gets down off the ceiling, thanks the owner and leaves. The blond turns around and starts to leave. The owner yells to her, "Hey where the heck do you think you are going?" The blond replies, "I''m going home. You can''t expect me to work in the dark!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I sprayed my dog with spot remover. Now he is gone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill each with a buck and a quarter Jill came down with $2.50. They didn''t go up for water!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man who went to buy some guns. The salesman at the store asked what he wanted to shoot. He said, "Cans" So the salesman asked, "What kind of cans?" "Ameri-cans, Afri-cans,,,,"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman have a child, and they need a crib, so they go to a crib factory store. This family is really poor, and they can only find cribs for $300. Then they find a crib for $20. They go up to the cashier and ask why. The cashier says its because it is cursed. The man and woman ask how it is cursed. The cashier replies, "After the 1st week of owning the crib, the mother of the child will die. After the 2nd week of owning the crib the child will die. And after the 3rd week the father of the child will die.(remember that last sentance) The man and woman decide they don''t believe the cashier, so they buy the crib anyway. A week goes by, and the woman dies. The man weeps. Another week goes by, and the child dies. The man weeps even more. Another week goes by, and the man trips over the dead mailman in front of his house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time, when there was a hope for mankind, some blonds appeared in front of a judge. The judge said, "You can either have world peace or keep your cellular phones and get electrocuted." So the blond takes out her cellular phone and the judge says; "What are you doing?" and she simply says; "Im phoning a friend." Now I''m not sure what happened after that because no one saw this blond ever again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were building a house. One saw that the other was going into her pouch and throwing every other nail out. She thought that this was weird and decided to look into. "Why do you keep throwing every other nail away?" "Well, when I pull one out of my pouch, and it is facing towards the house, I nail it in. If it is facing away from the house, it is defective and I throw it away." "You idiot, those nails aren''t defective, they are for the other side of the house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it''s raining," he said to his wife. "No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied. "No, I''m sure it was just rain," he said. Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a Communist Party official walking toward them. "Let''s not fight about it," the man said, "Let''s ask Comrade Rudolph whether it''s officially raining or snowing." As the official approached, the man said, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?" "It''s raining, of course," he replied, and walked on. But the woman insisted: "I know that felt like snow!" to which the man quietly replied: "Rudolph the Red, knows rain, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude...?" After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess you''d be eating alone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many jazz musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Don''t worry about the changes, we''ll fake it! Note: In jazz, the chord changes are what dictates the improvisation of the music.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife was in the kitchen making the boiled eggs for breakfast when her husband walked in and asked, "What''s for breakfast?" She turned to him and said, "You''ve got to make love to me this very moment." He, thinking it''s his lucky day, stood her over the kitchen table and they had sex. Afterwards he asked, "What was that all about?" She answered, "The egg timer''s broken!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is running out of his large office building when his boss spots him and asks him what he is doing. The man replies, "My wife called me and she says she is going to jump out our window and commit suicide." The boss realizes that this is a good excuse, but says, "Well, by the time you get home, won''t it be too late?" The man says, "Nah, I''m just going to open the window for her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was stopped at a red light when a fantastic looking blonde pulled up beside him in a really hot Mustang convertible. Trying to start a conversation, the man asked, "Hey,..... how many horses you got under the hood?" The blonde looked at the man bewildered, and replied, "Well,.... there''s one on the left side, one on the right side, ....... and oh yeah, there''s one on the front of the car. I guess there''s only three."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off. "Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally uttered. "Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?" "Didn''t you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!" "Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?" "Didn''t you see the letters ''UFO'' on the side of that vehicle?!" "Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant. "So?" "Don''t you know what ''UFO'' means?!" The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I''ve been working here for five years. Of course I know what ''UFO'' means - it means ''Unleaded Fuel Only''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them? Why do people who know the least know it the loudest? If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off? If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound? When it rains, why don''t sheep shrink? Should vegetarians eat animal crackers? When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in? If you''re cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly." On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?" "Yes," the boy''s mother answered. "And how is your son now?" the psychiatrist asked. "Who cares?" the mother replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Congratulations my boy! said the groom''s uncle. "I''m sure you''ll look back and remember today as the happiest day of your life." "But I''m not getting married until tomorrow," protested his nephew. "I know," replied the uncle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the interval at the Opera when Mrs. Sternberg rose from her seat and called: "Is there a doctor in the house? Is there a doctor in the house?!" A man in a tuxedo pushed his way towards her. "I''m a doctor" he said. "Oh, doctor," she said, "Have I got just the loveliest daughter for you...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A huge black man entered in a bar with a huge and colorful parrot on his shoulder. The bartender was amazed, so he asked "Where did you get that thing?" Then the parrot said, "Well they''re walking all over Africa..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q - Why do women have nipples? A - Because, if they didn''t, boobs would be pointless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond had a crazy idea one day to skip school, so she decided to try her luck. The day went by fine and she had a good day at the mall. A few days later, she gets a note saying she has to go to the office to talk about the day she was gone. She was very paranoid and afraid of what might happen. When she got to the office the counselor asked her to sit down, and said, "You never picked up your pictures that we gave out on the day you were absent." The blond replies, "Oh, is that all you called me down for? I thought you had found out I skipped school that day!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy came to Sunday School late. His teacher knew that he was usually very prompt so she asked, "Johnny, is there anything wrong"? The boy replied, "No, I was going fishing but my dad told me that I needed to go to church". The teacher was very impressed and asked Johnny if his dad had explained to him why it was more important to go to church than to go fishing. Johnny replied, "Yes teacher, Dad said he didn''t have enough bait for both of us".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she farted and caused global warming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if for your prom you wore a strapless dress but wore a bra that wasn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, there was a powerful slide, and when you go down on it, you wish for something and you get it. One guy goes down the slide, and says, "A pot of gold," and he gets it. Another guy goes down and says, "A pot of silver," and he gets it. The third guy says, "Weeee," and he gets a pot of wee!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time, my teacher said to dump our Math books. Then she said to get your Social Studies book. Then that became history.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy, "So I hear you''re getting married?" "Yep!" "Do I know her?" "Nope!" "This woman, is she good looking?" "Not really." "Is she a good cook?" "Naw, she can''t cook too well." "Does she have lots of money?" "Nope! Poor as a church mouse." "Well, then, is she good in bed?" "I don''t know." "Why in the world do you want to marry her then?" "Because she can still drive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You''re really doing great, aren''t you?" Morris replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc, ''Get a hot momma and be cheerful.''" The doctor said, "I didn''t say that. I said, ''You''ve got a heart murmur; be careful.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?" "No," he replied, "Arthritis."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so old, I woke up the other morning and thought I had an erection. I was really happy until I realized it was just a leg cramp!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once I asked a guy, " Do you love me, or is that a banana in your pocket?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you think cauliflower is a phone dating service for flowers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve tried to quote Jeff Foxworthy and screwed it up. You name your car the General Lee. You see a sign that says "bridge out" and you try to jump it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence. Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor''s Degree and the woman gets her Masters. Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman''s finger and two under the man''s eyes. Marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit. Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always wondered why there are so many blond jokes,but no brunettes. I asked a brunette friend of mine. "Why do you think there are no brunette jokes?" I asked her. "Well,that''s a given. Blonds are too stupid to make them up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock,knock! Who''s there? King! King who? King Kong is now part of China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a circle so hot???? Because it''s 360 degrees!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient:"Doctor,my wife thinks I''m crazy because I like sausages." Psychiatrist: "Rubbish! I like sausages too." Patient: Good,you should come and see my collection. I''ve got hundreds."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: "Does it hurt when you do this?" Patient: "Yes" Doctor: "Well, you shouldn''t do it then."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? A chu. A chu who? Bless you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why wasn''t the giraffe invited to the party? He was a pain in the neck to talk to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Driving to work, a gentleman had to swerve to avoid a box that fell out of a truck in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another officer had seen the carton in the road. The policmen stopped traffic and recovered the box. It was found to contain large upholstery tacks. "I''m sorry sir," the first trooper told the driver, "but I am still going to have to write you a ticket." Amazed, the driver asked for what. The trooper replied, "Tacks evasion."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a black man from jumping on your bed? -Put velcro on the ceiling. Why don''t black people dream anymore? -Because the last one that did got shot. How do you keep five black men from raping a white woman? -Give them a basketball. What do you call black ladies'' abortions? -Crimestoppers What do you say if you see your tv floating in the middle of the night? -"Drop it nigga!" Whats wrong with four Mexicans dying in an Impala? -An Impala can hold five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you name your kids after dead family pets you just might be a redneck!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl was eating lunch in the cafeteria and she was laughing and talking to all friends. But as you know, it is very distracting to talk while you''re eating. So she goes to put a french fry into her mouth and before anyone notices, she looks down because, you guessed it, she missed her mouth. Turns out everyone at the table had seen her do it. As the table bursts out laughing, someone says, "I do that all the time. I go to take a drink of water and I miss." Someone else said, "You have a hole in your lip." From the other end of the table someone yells "Who has a whore on their cheek?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is amazing how politicians can fit all their good points in a 30 second TV commercial.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes in an adult book store and asks for an inflatable doll. Guy behind the counter says, "Male or female?" Customer says, "Female." Counter guy asks, "Black or white?" Customer says, "White." Counter guy asks, "Radical Christian or Muslim Extremist?" Customer says, "What the hell does religion have to do with it?" Counter guy says, "The Muslim Extremist blows itself up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only in America can a poor black boy turn into a rich white woman... (Michael Jackson)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only in America can a President have relations in the oral office', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you met your wife on a hunting trip you just might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young naval student was being put through the paces by an old sea captain. "What would you do if a sudden storm sprang up on the starboard?" "Throw out an anchor, sir," the student replied. "What would you do if another storm sprang up aft?" "Throw out another anchor, sir." "And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do then?" asked the captain. "Throw out another anchor, sir." "Hold on," said the captain. "Where are you getting all those anchors from?" "From the same place you''re getting your storms, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, that when I went to her house, a roach tripped me and a rat took my wallet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, that when she fell in love , people wern''t laughing but the floor was cracking up!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you have more pets than relatives you just might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q - Why is there a big "E" on top of the standard eye chart at the optometrist''s office? A - The reason is if there was a big "O" on the chart women would lie about seeing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q - What do barbed wire and a thong have in common? A - Both protect the property, but neither obstruct the view.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do men pick their noses while driving? Because their butts are too hard to reach!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a tribe of very hostile Indians who, upon catching a person on their land, would cut the person up and make a canoe out of them. One day, three men were walking through the woods when they wandered upon the canoe-making Indian''s land. They were all caught and given one death wish. The man from Italy said, "I would like one last slice of pizza before I die." So he ate his pizza and was cut up and made into a canoe. The man from America said, "I would like one last hamburger before I die." So he ate his hamburger and was cut up and made a canoe. The last man asked for a fork. "What the hell - a fork??!!! Why the hell do you want a fuckin fork???" But they got him a fork, anyways. The man took the fork and began stabbing himself with it, saying, "YER NOT MAKIN A CANOE OUT OF ME!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. When you are older, you will settle for being the master of your weight and the captain of your bowling team.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a man from the city who was visiting a small farm, and during this visit he saw a farmer feeding pigs in a most extraordinary manner. The farmer would lift a pig up to a nearby apple tree, and the pig would eat the apples off the tree directly. The farmer would move the pig from one apple to another until the pig was satisfied, then he would start again with another pig. The city man watched this activity for some time with great astonishment. Finally, he could not resist saying to the farmer, "This is the most inefficient method of feeding pigs that I can imagine. Just think of the time that would be saved if you simply shook the apples off the tree and let the pigs eat them from the ground!" The farmer looked puzzled and replied, "What''s time to a pig?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The arithmetic teacher had written 10.9 on the blackboard and had then rubbed out the decimal point to show the effect of multiplying this number by ten. "Johnny," the teacher asked, "where is the decimal point now?" "On the eraser!" came back the quick reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ralph''s father said, "Let me see your report card." Ralph replied, "I don''t have it." "Why not?" His father asked. "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kevin attended a horse auction with his father, watching as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse''s legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Kevin asked, "Dad, why are you doing that?" His father replied, "Because when I''m buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy." Looking worried, Kevin said, "Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Phillip''s teacher asks him, "Can you name the Great Lakes?" Phillip, always fast with an answer, pipes up with, "I don''t need to. They''ve already been named."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary had a little lamb! The doctor fainted!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q :whats the best thing about children? A :making them!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde got an invitation to a party which said "Wear brown tie only!" After going to the party, she noticed that they were wearing pants and shirts also!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so old, that she cooked the last supper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so ugly that even Ripley''s couldn''t believe it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? You! You who? What are you so happy about?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young husband with an inferiority complex insisted he was just a little pebble on a vast beach. The marriage counselor, trying to be creative, told him, "If you wish to save your marriage, you''d better be a little boulder."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Like I said before, I never repeat myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home after a party drunk. When he interrogates his wife about who she is, she replies, "I''m your wife! Did you forget me?" The man says, "Sorry, drinking makes me forget my pain."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so bad my imaginary friend left me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the piece of gum cross the road? Because it was stuck to the chicken''s foot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know why there are no Wal-Marts in Iraq? Because there are so many Targets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Director said to the actress: "You have to jump from 100 feet into a swimming pool." Actress: "But I dont know how to swim." Director: "I know, that''s why I removed all the water from the swimming pool."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engine driver was taken to court because he derailed a train. The judge asked, "Why did you derail the train?" The engine driver replied, "A man ran in front of the tracks." The judge replied, "You are a fool. You derailed a train and killed hundreds of people just because of one man, you should have killed him by running the train over him." The driver replied, "I tried to, but before I could run the train over him he moved away from the tracks so I just turned the train to run the train over him!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you find a blonde in a submarine? A: Simple, she would be the only one with a parachute on!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GOOD JOKE: A blonde. BETTER JOKE: A blonde playing chess. BEST JOKE: The blonde wins the game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the blonde say after seeing the banana on the ground? A: Oh, I''m gonna slip again!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked a woman,"Will you marry me?" The woman replied,"No." They both lived happily ever after!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('you''ve ever called the towtruck on yourself because you couldn''t afford gas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What 3 words are in the name Amanda? A, man, DUH!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you wore a jumper to your prom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your swimsuit is your bra and underwear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to Google Translater to write something to my friend in German. I typed in English: Hey there! I am bored. What do you want to do? It came out in German: Hey dort! ich werde gebohrt, was Sie tun mchten? If I translate it back into English, it comes out: Hey there! I am bored, which you would like to do? I don''t want to do anyone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My 4 year old brother just had a birthday. At his birthday party he invited all his friends and a clown for the entertainment. The clown didn''t have too many options for entertaining 4 year olds, so he figured a nice game of Simon Says would be fun. "Simon says, ''Point to your nose.''" The children all do it and he continues. "Simon says, ''Point to your head.''" Again they all do. "Sit down." All those who sat down are out. "Simon says, ''Point to your lip.''" Trying to end this silly game and go on with his pathetic life, "Point to your eye." "OWWWWW!!!" Yep. They lost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Umm...why is this category called "blond" when really it''s spelled "blonde"??', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The 1st blonde says-"I hate you!I never want to see you again." The smarted 2nd twin says-"You idiot!Then don''t look in the mirror!" The 1st says-"Why can''t I look in the mirror?" The 2nd says-"Because we''re twins and we look exactly the same!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is orange, red, and lies in the grass? A: A wounded cheesie!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the baby ant afraid of his uncles? Because his uncles were all ants!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Socrates is walking down the road and sees his old friend Uripedes carrying a pair of pants. Socrates says "Hi, Uripedes" Uripidees says "I sure did, Usodes?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I''ll serve you, but don''t start anything." 2. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either. 3. Deja Moo: The feeling that you''ve heard this bull before. 4. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn''t find any. 5. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can''t feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can''t - I''ve cut off your arms!" 6. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1: Fatten every one around you to make them look bigger. You''ll look thinner 2: If no-one sees you eat it, it has no calories. 3: Drink a diet soda with your candy bar. They''ll cancel each other out. 4: Life''s short, eat dessert first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you say constipated in German? farfrompoopin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many roadies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 2. One to try to hammer it in with a microphone, and another to find a cable to plug that microphone in. Q: How many union members does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: If we do screw in that light bulb, it''ll be a 4 hour minimum on the payroll. Q: How many sound techs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: None. That''s the light guy''s job. Q: How many lighting techs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: IT''S A LAMP!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she brought the jigsaw puzzle back to the store because she thought it was broken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, there were three young men named Poop, Manners and Shutup, and one day they were riding their bikes when Poop fell off his bike, so Manners went to help Poop, while Shutup went to the police. When Shutup arrived at the police station, he said, "Quick! My friend fell off his bike!" So the police said, "Let''s start at the beginning. What''s your name?" then Shutup said, "Shutup" (because that was his name.) But the police didn''t understand, so he said, "Where''s your manners?" Shutup said "Picking up Poop!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a child named Laura. She asked her mom what the hardest report she ever had to do was. Her mom said, "It was to write an essay on the belly of a frog." Laura said, "Wow!!How did you get the frog in to the typewriter?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once,there was a teacher and a girl named Wendy.The teacher asked for Wendy to say a sentence starting with the word I. So wendy started to say I is....Then the teacher said, "No Wendy, it is I am." So Wendy said, "I am the ninth letter if the alphabet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man was watching a show that shows how people make candy bars (by the way he has one in his hand). About halfway through the show, his son comes in asks him if he could ask him a question. The man says yes so his son asks him, "Where can most criminals be found?" The Man answers, "Behind candy bars" "My point exactly," the son replies. (The son found 12 dollars to missing the day before and his father was the only who could take it given the circumstances at the time.) A couple weeks later the man finds many of his personal items go missing. Then, one day when found his watch missing and he realizes his son took it. So the man waited until his son took out a candy bar for dessert after dinner and then he asks him, "Where can most criminals be found?" "Behind Bars," replies his son thinking, *No DUH!!!? How dumb does he think I am?* "Candy Bars to be exact," his father adds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Matt: I bet you can''t spell "I cup." Sarah: I C-U-P Matt: Eww! You see me pee!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the husband ask the wife before they were married to find her own friends for life? Because like most marriages he knows they will hate each other one day and she will need help from her friends or she commit suicide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were a boy and your parents named you dick. Wouldn''t you be embarassed and change your name officially?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now I lay me down to sleep With the boy across the street Won''t my mommy be surprised When my tummy starts to rise Won''t my daddy be disgusted When he finds my cherry''s busted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy go to a girls house and notice her home is very messy and full of paper and clay pot and clothing all over. The boy tell her he bring some pot to her and she answer there is clay pot all over home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so dumb everytime she hears a car horn she yells "Happy New Year!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat they show IMAX movies on her butt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 2 lesbians in a cupboard? A: A liquor cabinet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes into a bar and orders a beer, He drinks it, and 5 minutes later orders another. This goes on for 2 hours straight, the guy ordering a beer every 5 minutes or so. After 2 hours the guy has had 24 beers and is pretty drunk. The bartender looks at the guy and says, "How did you do that/" The guy responds, "It''s no problem. You just chug ''em back." Bartender; "Not the drinking part, I mean how did you drink 24 beers without going to the bathroom?" The guy says, "Depends"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is marriage so much like a tornado? At first there is a lot of huffing and blowing, in the end someone loses their house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who ran for president? She got tired after 2 miles and dropped out of the running.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the kid like the bowl of carrots and peas? Because he could eat every carrot and pea in the bowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a guy is a "chick magnet", and opposites attract, doesn''t that make him gay?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10) Hum or sing when ever possible. 9) Always chew with your mouth open. 8) Pretend to fly around the room. 7) Have fights with your imaginary friends. 6) At school, fall asleep in every class. 5) When people turn around, make faces. 4) Scream every 10 minutes. 3) Tell every one you have a twin and then pretend to be the twin. 2) Say, ''I don''t know.'' when you are asked a question, no matter what the question is. 1) Tap your pencil on every surface.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You momma is so stupid, she went to the Clippers game to get a haircut!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond in a mathematics test encountered this problem Find X This was her answer i i \ i \ 14.6578i \ i \ X________ Here it is i \ i \ i \ i \ i_________\ 12.76', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Amy: Yesterday I saw a man in the mall with very long arms. Every time he went up the stairs he would step on them. Bob: Wow... He stepped on his arms? Amy: No. On the STAIRS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: If the world was a jacket where would the people from the ghetto go? Answer:In da Hood!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Might Be a Redneck if you have a pond full of gasoline and a car wreck in the bottom of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t niggers like dirt bikes? Because when it starts, it says: "Run nigga nigga run."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A baby was born that was so advanced that he could talk. He looked around the delivery room and saw the doctor. "Are you my doctor?" he asked. "Yes, I am." The baby said, "Thank you for taking such good care of me during birth." He looked at his mother and asked, "Are you my mother?" "Yes, I am," she said. "Thank you for taking such good care of me before I was born," he said. He then looked at his father and asked, "Are you my father?" "Yes, I am," his father answered. The baby motioned him to come closer, then poked him on the forehead with his index finger 5 times, saying, "I want you to know that THAT HURTS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Go to this website ... I know some people might say that this isn''t a joke, but it''s really funny if you go to the website. Trust me. http://www.dr-joe.net/quiz.html It doesn''t have any viruses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Go to this website ... I know some people might say that this isn''t a joke, but it''s really funny if you go to the website. Trust me. It doesn''t have any viruses. http://home.comcast.net/~wolfand/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a money-making seminar. This man had so much bling he sparkled. I could tell he knew how to make money. He was telling the story of how he worked his way up the corporate ladder from a lowly mail boy, to cubicle, to corner office, to the president of his own very successful business. He went on to tell the whole process of sucking up to the bosses and such. Anyway the way he made most of his money was with his own business. It wasn''t persay the way he ran it but the idea behind it. He mass producted one product but sold it as two. He made long rubber open ended cylinders and sold them as a box of 12 condoms for $6 and he sold a bag of balloons for $3. The man was a genius...pure genius...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A smart blonde, a leprachaun and a fairy were in an elevator together talking about something, but whatever they were talking about was not true because there is no such thing as a leprechaun or a fairy or a smart blonde.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom: How did you do on your history test? Kid: Not good. Mom: Why? Kid: They asked me things that happened before I was born!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t elephants smoke? Their butts don''t fit in the ash tray', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An older couple are playing in the annual golf club championship. They are playing in a play off hole and it is down to a 6 inch putt that the wife has to make. She takes her stance and her husband can see her trembling. She putts and misses; they lose the match. On the way home in the car her husband is fuming, "I can''t believe you missed that putt! That putt was no longer than my ''willy''." The wife just looked over at her husband and smiled and said, "Yes dear, but it was much harder!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the condom fly across the room A: It was pissed off!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women were shopping. When they started to discuss their home lives, one said, "Seems like all Alfred and I do anymore is fight. I''ve been so upset I''ve lost 20 pounds." "Why don''t you just leave him then?" asked her friend. "Oh! Not yet." the first replied, "I''d like to lose at least another fifteen pounds first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse. "I know that smart aleck Tex," said the first. "He''s going to start bragging about that new foreign car he bought as soon as he gets back." "Not Tex," the second cowboy replied. "He''ll always be just a good ol'' boy. When he walks in, I''m sure all he''ll say is hello." "I know Tex better than either of you," said the third. "He''s so smart, he''ll figure out a way to do both. Here he comes now." Tex swung open the bunkhouse door and shouted, "Audi, partners!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a horny ghost say to scare people? BOO...BS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, my parents were driving, and they wanted a cup of tea, so they drove to a cafe. When they ordered, a horse walked in and sat at the table across from them. The horse then ordered a cup of coffe. My parents thought it was a bit strange, so they asked the waitress if this was normal, and the waitress said, "No, he usually orders lemonade."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a wife and a prostitute? Prostitute is cheaper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am sure everyone has heard the saying "If it ain''t broke, don''t fix it." Well, I have improved on this saying so that it applies to my life, and here it is. "If it ain''t broke, it ain''t ours!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Max: Here I am, once again! I''m torn into pieces...can''t deny it, can''t pretend! Just thought you were the one! Broken up, deep inside. But you don''t get to see these tears I cry....BEHIND THESE HAZEL EYES! Bailey: So, wha''d you do with the money? Max: What money??? Bailey: The money your mom gave you for voice lessons!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and says "Bartender, give me a triple shot of Jack!". The bartender pours, and the man downs it, slams the glass on the bar, and says, "Another". The bartender pours another. The man downs it and says, "Another". As the bartender pours the third glass he says, "Mister you drink like you have a problem. Want to talk about it?" The man says, "Ten years I''ve been married to my wife, and today I go home a little early to surprise her, and I find my best friend, MY BEST FRIEND, in bed having sex with her." The bartender says "Geez, what did you say?." The man says " I told him, BAD DOG! BAD DOG!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to a new bar at the top of a skyscraper and over by the counter she sees an attractive man. She keeps her eye on him as she orders a drink, and she sees the man take a shot and jump out the window. She''s so shocked she can''t speak, but moments later he walks back into the bar. He goes back to the counter, orders another shot, takes it and jumps out the window. Sure enough moments later he walks back into the bar again, completely unharmed. She walks over to him and says, "I''ve been watching you, and I''ve got to ask what is going on. We''re thirty stories up!" He leans over and passes her a shot, "If you take a shot of this, you can fly." So she takes the shot, jumps out the window, and plummets to her death. The bartender looks over and says "Superman, you''re a real asshole when you drink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Bob were mischievous brothers. They always picked fights with each other. One day, their mother told them to go outside and play, but to remember to be good. Suddenly, Bob came running back in and said, "Mommy! Mommy! Bill broke Ms. Allen''s window!" Ms. Allen was their next door neighbor. Their mom was shocked. "Tell me, Bob. How did Bill break her window?" Bob puffed out his chest and said accusingly, "I threw a rock at him and he dodged!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she joined MySpace and there was no room for anyone else. Yo momma is so fat, she tried uploading her picture to a computer, but the C: Drive filled up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was a Typo from Jack-in-the-Box 1. Come in for our new Chihuahua (Chibatta, Don''t ask.)Sandwich. 2. Newspaper Look ravished (ravishing) for your big day. 3. Church Newsletter Come tonight to see famous missionary Bobby Belch. Come hear Bobby Belch from Africa. 4. Sunday School Lesson: Jesus Walks on Water Tonight''s Lesson: Finding Jesus 5. Tonight''s Sermon: "What is Hell?" Come early to listen to our choir perform.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said, "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?" To which the farmer replied, "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TRUE STORY I was working in a restaurant for several years. On a very busy night, I was helping out with the seating. I showed seats to a party of four and when I went to give them the menus, I realised we only had one menu left. As I placed the menu in front of one of them and told the other three that I would get them menus soon, they began laughing. They told me that the woman that I gave the menu to was blind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TRUE STORY My boyfriend decided to invite me over to his home one day. When I arrived, I was hoping we would be alone. When I got in, it was dark, except for the room we were in and I couldn''t hear any noise, so I guessed we were. We started to make out until he grabbed my hand and brought me upstairs, covering my eyes and saying; "I have a surprise for you, why don''t you make yourself a little more comfortable." Of course, I took that as a hint that he wanted sex, and he left saying he''d be back in five minutes. So I took off my clothes, sitting on his bed. Five minutes later, he called me to come out into the room next door to his room. I walked out proudly and walked into another room naked... and saw three shocked faces looking upon my body. He didnt tell me the surprise was he wanted me to meet his parents!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Perfect breasts (o)(o) Silicone breasts ( + )( + ) Perky breasts (*)(*) Big nipple breasts (@)(@) A cups o o D cups { O }{ O } Wonder bra breasts (oYo) Cold breasts ( ^ )( ^ ) Lopsided breasts (o)(O) Pierced Breasts (Q)(O) Hanging Tassels Breasts (p)(p) Grandma''s Breasts \ o /\ o / Against The Shower Door Breasts ( )( ) Android Breasts | o | | o | Mamogram Breasts (_)(_) Martha Stewart''s Breasts ($)($)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After years of hiding the fact that the love is gone, Mom and Dad announced to their grown children that they''re getting a divorce. The kids were totally distraught and, as a stab at keeping their parents together, arranged a series of sessions for the whole family with a world-famous marriage counselor. The counselor worked for hours, tried all of his methods and tricks, but the parents wouldn''t even talk to each other. Finally, he walked over to a closet, brought out an oboe, and began to play. After a minute or so, the parents started talking and, as the counselor continued soloing on the oboe, the couple discovered they''re not that far apart and decided to give their marriage another try. The children were amazed and asked the counselor how he managed to do it. He replied, "Simple. I''ve never seen a couple that wouldn''t talk through an oboe solo."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so covered in dirt that if you wanted to eat a tootsie roll, you''d have to wear white gloves to keep from biting your finger!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down, unless you''re a diabetic!!!!! 2. People who live in glass houses should have sex in their basements!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, violets are blue, If I can use technology, why can''t you? The sky is blue, the grass is green, why is your brain as small as a lima bean? Your humorous, funny, have OCD, How come you can''t use technology without me? I love you, I love you, I really do, but roses are red and violets are blue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy(howling): A crab just bit my toe! Father: Which one? Boy: How should I know?!?!?! All crabs look alike to me!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''How long will the next bus be?'' ''About eighteen feet.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Can you name four animals of the cat family? Mary:Mother cat,Father cat,and two kittens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: Mrs Smith, you have acute angina. Mrs. Smith: I came here to be examined, not admired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: If you found five pence in one pocket and ten pence in the other,what would you have? Willy: Somebody else''s trousers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus walks into an inn puts 3 nails on the counter and asks, "Can you put me up for the night?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly patient needed a heart transplant and discussed options with his doctor. The doctor said, "We have three possible donors. The first is a young, healthy athlete who died in an automobile accident. The second is a middle-aged businessman who never drank or smoked and who died flying his private jet. The third is an attorney who died after practicing law for 30 years. Which do you want?" "I''ll take the attorney''s heart," said the patient. After a successful transplant, the doctor asked the patient why he had chosen the donor he did. "It was easy," said the patient, "I wanted a heart that hadn''t been used."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of triangle is never wrong??? A right triangle!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of trouble does a five foot man have??? Five feet!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat she''s fatter than you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is a cat''s favorite game? A: Go Fish!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dark, she''s not afraid of the dark, the dark is afraid of her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid, on Halloween she looked ouside the window and said, "Oh, no!" and called the Ghost Busters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so fat, your dad rolled on her and never came off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat, the only reason she wanted to go to space was to taste the Milky Way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do fish keep their money? In a riverbank!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a a bunch of fish swimming in the sky?? A High School!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat and stupid that I told her to show me a pushup and she brought me one from the Ice Cream Man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Why do we sometimes call the middle ages as the dark ages? Betty: Because they had so many knights.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: When is a black dog not a black dog? A: When its a grey hound.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Davy Crockett had three ears? No, how was that? He had a right ear,a left ear,and a wild frontier.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do the monsters go when they lose a hand? To the second-hand shop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between unlawful and illegal? Unlawful is against the law. Illegal is a sick bird.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Farmer: This is a dogwood tree. Cityman: How can you tell? Farmer: By its bark', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. Who''s there? Isabel. Isabel who? Is-a-bel ringing? I thought I heard one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat, when she breast-fed you, you drank bacon grease.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Puffy say when Ben asked him about J-LO ? "Take that, take that"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Wizards don''t use lightbulbs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What math term tells what acorns say when they are a tree??? Geometry!! (Geo-m-e-try) (Gee I''m a tree)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your dad is Santa Claus and your mom is A HO HO HO!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Knock Knock! -Who''s there? -You know. -You know who? -Thats right, avada kedavra!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love it when you go down on me... you relieve so much tension and stress... but when you''re making me feel really good, you come back up... Stupid gas prices...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day I went to a zoo, but the only animal there was a dog. It was a shihtzu.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat she should get cingular on her stomach so she can get rollover minutes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy:- "Hello, is that 77 77 77? Can you call 911, my finger is stuck in the 7"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you have only one egg for breakfast? Because un oeuf is enough!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: Do you know the difference between a chicken and lettuce? Jill: No. Joe: Remind me not to send you to the supermarket!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Buck Fush', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t believe in reincarnation, which is strange, because in a previous existence, I did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You used to have two brains. One you lost a long time ago, and the other one went looking for it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so poor she had to save up to pay attention!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: how many men does it take to screw in a light bulb A: 3, one to screw in the light bulb an 2 to listen to him brag about the "srewing" part', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kurt and Megan (a blonde) were bored in math class and one day when they decided to play "The Calculator Game". I''m sure many people reading this remember it - it''s the one where you enter "1 + 1 =" into your calculator and continue pressing the "=" sign. The goal is to see who can get to the highest number while the math teacher is talking. Bring back any memories? Anyways, Kurt and Megan waited until the teacher started talking, and the contest was on! Fingers were pushing the "=" sign like mad. A hour and a half later, Kurt and Megan compared results. Kurt showed his number: 5,318,008. Megan said, "I don''t get it. I was feeling so clever and I thought I''d play a trick on you, but I''m still at 1!!!" "Well, what trick did you play?" Said Kurt. Megan said, "I know that multiplication makes numbers bigger than addition does, so instead of pushing 1 + 1 =, =, =, =, ..., I pushed 1 x 1 = = = = =..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Enter this old elementary school story onto your calculator fun a cheap laugh - the numbers or signs that you should enter are in quotes. Once upon a time, there was an old lady who was "69" years old. She had always thought that her boobs were "222" (too too too) big. So she went to "51" (fifty-first) street to see Doctor "X" "8" times. When she came back, she was...*turn calculator upside-down and read*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat and stupid, when she stepped on the scale she went running to me saying "Look! Look! The scale talks!" I dropped my purse onto it to test this theory and it said, "hI" in the area where the numbers usually show up. Yo momma said, "See!? When I stepped on it, it said, ''hELLO!''" I told her, "The scale''s upside-down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Whats usually used as the conductor of electricity? Orville: Why-er.... Teacher: Correct, wire. Now tell me, what is the unit of electrical power? Orville: The what? Teacher: That''s absolutely right, the watt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Oscar, if you had five pieces of candy, and Joey asked for one, how many would you have left? Oscar: Five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: If you stood with your back to the north and faced due south, what would be on your left hand? Lisa: Fingers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the secret of success? "push" said the doorbell "never be lead" said the pencil "Take panes" said the window "always keep cool" said the ice "never lose your head" said the drum "make light of everything" said the fire "be sharp in all your dealings" said the knife "find a good thing and stick to it" said the glue', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good luck turns into bad luck when you call the credit card company to tell them they made a mistake on your bill..... and they agree because they didn''t charge you enough. Good luck turns into bad luck when the cutest boy rings you up.... then apologies because he dialed the wrong number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiter, why is my food all mushed up? -Well, you did ask me to step on it. Waiter, these eggs are bad. -Don''t blame me. I only laid the table. Waiter, is there soup on my menu? -No, I wiped it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats faster than a speeding bullet, more powerfull than a locomotive, able to leap tall buildings and has a carpark? Super market', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('University scientists have released the results of a recent analysis that reveals the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. It turns out that the "hops" in beer contain certain phyto-estrogens, and scientists believe that be drinking enough beer, men may turn into women. In the study, 100 male volunteers were asked to drink 8 pints of beer in one hour. The results were observed and recorded. At the end of one hour, every single subject had developed female characteristics and the test was terminated. The data is provided below: After one hour, 100% of the test subjects: 1. gained weight. 2. talked excessively without making sense. 3. became overly emotional. 4. couldn''t drive. 5. failed to think rationally. 6. argued over nothing. 7. had to sit down while urinating. 8. refused to apologize when obviously wrong. After these eight symptoms, no further testing was necessary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a certified true story. One of the instructors at the local training centre decided to try to pull the leg of one the labourers who worked there. He told the lad, who lived in a little fishing port about 12 miles away, that there was a job coming available soon in his home town. The lad asked what job this was, and was told that the job was not very arduous, but paid good money because it involved unsocial hours, going out to the end of the 679 meter pier twice a day and telling the tide when it was time to come in. "You must think I''m soft", he said, and the boys thought he''d twigged, only for him to restore their faith in his stupidity - "That sort of job is handed down from father to son; I''ve no chance",he says!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a very simple way to explain the theory of mind over matter. Once you lose you mind, nothing matters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man who stands on toilet is high on pot. Man with face in toilet is shit faced. Man who fools around with neighbour''s wife at wrong time of month get caught red handed. Man who fart in church sit in own pew.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you kill a circus? Go for the juggler!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A complex is a phobia. A complex is a large building. A complex is another word for complicated. So if you have a phobia about complicated large buildings, you might be said to have a complex complex complex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy: i know a person who is 35 and still in 4th grade! Eddie: Really! who? Billy: My teacher!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It must suck being a penis because- 1. Your best friends are nuts 2. Your closest neighbour is an asshole 3. You vomit when you''re excited 4. Your owner abuses you And if you''re in the mood- 5. You work double-duty on Tuesday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Tony was staying with his grandmother for a few days. He''d been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the house and asked her, "Grandma, what is that called when two people are sleeping in the same room and one is on top of the other?" She was a little taken aback, but decided to tell him the truth. "It''s called sexual intercourse, darling." Little Tony just said, "Oh, okay." and went back outside to talk and play with the other kids. A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, "Grandma, it is not called sexual intercourse! It''s called bunk beds! Oh, Jimmy''s mom wants to talk to you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the fish say when he swam into a concrete wall? Dam!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mamma is so thin when she turns sidways she dissapears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do the chinese get their names? Their parents kick a can down the street... ching chang chung bing....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a blonde who looks stupid in her ear muffs? Anything you want! She cant hear you! P.S. no offence to blondes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the fish say when he crashed into a wooden wall? Beaver damn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if you find your old man staggering around the backyard? Shoot him again!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your face is so ugly, we''re going to war over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s a pick up line in a gay bar?? A: Would you like me to push your stool in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your face is so oily, we''re going to war over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('your mom is like paris hilton ... a dirty whore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the chicken cross the road? To prove he was chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, when I went to her house to use the bathroom, she told me to pick a corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your floor is so dirty, I stepped inside and said "Nice carpet." You said, "Man, those are cockroaches!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time I went school shopping... AND BOUGHT THREE SCHOOLS!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so cheap, she went to McDonalds and put a hamburger on lay-away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s breath smells so bad, her teeth packed up and left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you work without a shirt on, and so does your husband, you might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('one of my friends was in trouble because he had sex with his teacher, but the bad part is he''s home schooled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she jumped out the window and fell up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, I got stuck in her shadow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bloke stayed up all night, wondering where the sun had gone; then it dawned on him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:How many egotists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just one. He holds up the lightbulb while the rest of the world revolves around him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother and I were sitting at the computer reading the daily teaser from the past week. I read the last one (April 30th 2006) and my sister(who is a blonde) walks in to get a drink. I''m reading a line that says:"But, madam!", replied the bellman, and my sister walks up behind me and says "What did you call me?!" and I say, "Well I didn''t call you any thing. I was reading this joke and she says, "Oh well I thought you were calling me a damn bitch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My home town is so small, we have part-time village idiot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a lollipop, she is round and has been licked by everyone', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she thought Fruit Punch was a gay boxer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so dumb, she was on her way to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport Left" so she turned around and went home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so stupid, she has a peep hole in the glass door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so short, she stepped in a puddle and drowned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, she has never seen 50 cent--and ! ain''t talkin about the rapper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was about a month ago when a man in Amsterdam felt that he needed to confess, so went to his priest: "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. During WWII I hid a refugee in my attic." "Well," answered the priest, "that''s not a sin." "But I made him agree to pay me 20 Gulden for every week he stayed." "I admit that wasn''t good, but you did it for a good cause." "Oh, thank you, Father; that eases my mind. I have one more question..." "What is that, my son?" "Do I have to tell him the war is over?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, she reuses her toilet paper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, on her drivers'' license it says, "picture continued onto other side."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blonde decided to build a brick wall, so she went to a home depot. While a worker was walking down an aisle, he saw the blonde walking around in circles looking confused, so he went over and asked her what she wanted to make. She answered that she wanted to make a brick wall. Then the worker asked her what size; after thinking thoroughly she answered, "And they say blondes are stupid; how am I supposed to know? There is no fence to measure."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come you''re late? asks the bartender as the blonde waitress walks in the door. "It was awful," she explains. "I was walking down Elm street and there was this terrible accident. A man was lying in the middle of the street. He''d been thrown from his car. His leg was broken, his skull was fractured, and there was blood everywhere. Thank God I took that first-aid course and all my training came back to me in a minute." "What did you do?" asks the bartender. "I sat down and put my head between my knees to keep from fainting!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left." Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don''t worry, we can fly just fine on two engines." An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours. But don''t worry, we still have one engine left." A young blonde passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we''ll be up here all day!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She sent me a fax with a stamp on it. -She tripped over the cordless phone. -She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. -She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. -At the bottom of the application where is says "Sign here", she wrote Sagittarius. -If she spoke her mind, she''d be speechless. -When she heard that 90% of all crimes were around the home, she moved. -She got an AM radio. It took her 9 months to figure out that she could use it at night. -She stood staring at the frozen orange juice because it said "Concentrate".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael Jackson and his wife are in the recovery room with their new baby son. The doctor walks in and Michael asks: "Doctor, how long before we can have sex?" The doctor replies, "I''d wait until he''s at least 14."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she thinks N*SYNC is where the dirty dishes are put.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so hunchbacked, she has to wear safety goggles when she pees.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she wore an X-Files T-shirt and a helicopter landed on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she got fired from an M&M factory for throwing away all the W''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat even Bill Gates couldn''t pay for her liposuction!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she fell over trying to rock herself to sleep and couldn''t get back up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so ugly, she had to trick-or-treat over the phone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb she asked for a price check at the .99 cent store!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sky was dark The moon was high We were alone Just she and I Her hair was brown Her eyes were too I knew just what She wanted to do So with my courage I did my best And placed my hand Upon her breast I trembled and shook And felt her heart Slowly she spread Her legs apart I knew she was ready But I didn''t know how It was my first try At milking a cow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lonely fisherman? A Master-Baiter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Auntie Em, hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. Dorothy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose? A: A collie-flower!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: I hope I didn''t see you copying the test from your friend. Student: I hope you didn''t either', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an elephant chasing a cat? Depends on what his name is.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jr: This year I failed every class except biology. Mary: How did you do that? Jr: Easy, I didn''t take biology', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did one arithmetic book say to the other? A: I have a lot of problems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, I was walking along our road and saw a man who appeared to be very old and well-lived sitting in a rocking chair. Surely, I thought, this man had all the answers. So I asked, "How did you live to such a healthy old age?" He said, "I do lots of drugs, eat lots of sugars and fats, I smoke, and I never exercise." "Wow," I said, "how old are you again??" "I''m 22."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard some guys talking about you yesterday. One said that you weren''t fit to sleep with pigs, but I stuck up for you; I said you were!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know that the world is going crazy when: the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America''s Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn''t want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named ''Bush'', ''Dick'', and ''Colon''. -Chris Rock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s green and turns red at the touch of a button? A frog in a liquidizer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a family of gnus, and one day, Mr Gnu went out to get some food but was ambushed and eaten by a pride of lions. Next salute, a poacher shoots Mrs Gnu, leaving poor Baby Gnu to starve to death. Well, that''s the end of the gnus; here''s the weather . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Money may not grow on trees, but it would seem as if morons like you certainly do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A ninety-year-old couple was going to bed, and the old lady was feeling romantic. She said to her husband, "I remember, when we were younger, how you used to hold my hand at night." Grumbling under his breath, her husband reached over and held her hand. Shortly after, she said, "I remember how, when we were younger, you kissed me every night before we went to sleep." Really getting ticked off, the husband gave her a quick peck on the cheek. Then she said, "I remember how, when we were younger, you used to bite my neck." Angrily, the man threw the covers off of himself and stormed out of the room Surprised, the woman called after him asking what he is doing. "Going to get my teeth!" he replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour petrol on him and set him on fire, and he''ll go "WOOF"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mom''s so old that she was alive when the Raiders had both eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a dick... when it gets hard fuck it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many of the trees and rainforests are being cut down. So in effort the B.H.O.A. made a slogan, Save a tree Burn a bush Bush as in former president', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, it takes 20 navy ships just to get her half way across the ocean, and they run out of gas. Then she farts and goes around the world 2 times.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In this age of political correctness we must reajust our terms. People are no longer concidered gay, here are two better options: Good: A wanabe transvestite Best: Heterosexually challenged.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop, and hangs it on her bathroom door. One evening, while getting undressed, she playfully says "Mirror, mirror, on my door, make my bustline forty four". Instantly, there is a brilliant flash of light, and her breasts grow to enormous proportions. Excitedly, she runs to tell her husband what happened, and in minutes they both return. This time the husband crosses his fingers and says "Mirror mirror on the door, make my penis touch the floor!". Again, there''s a bright flash... and then his legs fall off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so skinny, when it''s pouring outside, she can dodge the raindrops', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so stupid she went to McDonalds and thought she could buy the whole menu for a $', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when God said let there be light, he asked your mom to move over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Walk to your neighbor''s house and ask in your best British accent, "May I borrow a cup of pants?" 2. Go over to a friend''s house, take off your shirt, put on one of theirs and leave. 3. When a telemarketer calls, say, "Welcome to Hell! Satan speaking, how may we reap your soul today?" 4. Randomly say quotes from the movie Anchorman out of context. 5. Wake up really early. Sneak into your neighbor''s house, get the newspaper, brew up some coffee, make breakfast, and wait for him to see you. Then scream and promptly exclaim, "What are you doing in my house?!?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The old Lord of the Manor was finally on his death-bed, and had called his servants to his bed-side. To his butler, he said, "Jeeves, you have been with me now for nearly 40 years, and for your loyal service I shall leave you Ashley Hall, with its 74 rooms, and a 100% pension." "Thank you, your lordship," said Jeeves. Turning to the house-keeper, "Jurby, you have been in my employ for 25 years, and for your excellent running of the house, I leave you Grantley Hall with its 42 rooms, and a 75% pension." "Thank you, your lordship," said Jurby. Finally, he turned to the chauffeur, "Parker, you have been with me now for 6 months, and in that time you have crashed my 1912 Rolls Royce, blown up the engine in the Le Mans-winning 1928 Bentley, and got the maid pregnant. I''m leaving you bugger all." "Thank you, your lordship; and how many rooms does that have?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A British girl recently moved to the United States and their home was near the Colorado River in Texas. The English teacher asked the kids to write about their home and neighborhood. The British girl wrote "My home is near the Colourado River." as part of her work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Andy was a staunch Republican, while Mary was Democrat through and through. They met at a political rally, and spent many hours arguing back and forth, until eventually love blossomed, and they got married. On the wedding night, however, as many of their friends had prophesied, they argued. Turning their backs on each other, they went to sleep; but about 3 in the morning - "I''m sorry, Andy. There''s been a split in the Democrat Party, and if the Republican member stood now, he''d get in with no problem." "Too late, the Republican member stood as an Independent, and lost his deposit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly lady went to a butcher''s shop one day, and noticed that on the liver in the window were two white balls. Being of a curious nature, she asked what these white balls might be, to be told that they were golf balls, and that placing them on the liver kept them supple. She returns the following week, when there were four of these white balls lying on the liver. "So you''ve shot another golfer, then?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man from Rangoon Whose farts could be heard on the moon; When you''d least expect ''em They''d burst from his rectum With the force of a raging typhoon!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so ghetto, both she and her dog have weave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('101 Hot ''n'' Spicy Meals by Tung Payne', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fortune teller escaped from prison and became a small medium at large.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft, and I''ll show you A-flat minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever noticed people who cough/sneeze/do just about anything they can to spread their germs to everyone and everywhere? Well basically their theory is make germs like forwards. Try to get them around the world in 40 days or less. Lets try to get rid of these people rather then the avian virus before there is an epidemic. So to all those classmates who sit behind you and refuse to covertheir mouths-Good day to you all. In the words of Tiny Tim "and to all a good night."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is such a whore... She gets more ass than a toilet seat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is green and yellow and eats nuts? GONORRHEA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, when she fell on the ground, I tried not to laugh, but the ground was cracking up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tommy the Hedgehog was one of a rare sub-division which suffered a small but significant genetic defect. This defect manifested itself in a malformed penis, which divided into four branches; though a little unusual, it was a good way to meet a lot of intrigued girl hedgehogs, so Tommy was a rather proud of this abnormality. One peculiarity of his family was the way that he slept; curled up in a ball, lying on his back, and it was while taking a nap one day that he felt a terrible pain in the genital region. He jumped up to see his penis disappear down the throat of a large cat. "What the HELL are you playing at?" shouted Tommy; "I''m awfully sorry," replied the cat, "it''s just that I''m a four-point tool eater jaguar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three friends decided to check out a room in a hotel, but before the man gave them their key he said, "In your room there is a window. If you jump out of it while wishing something outloud your wish will come true." The three friends raced to their room, the first guy jumped out and said, "I wish for a big pile of money!" and landed in one. The second guy wished for a group of cheerleaders that would love him. He jumped out and landed in their arms. The third guy got a running start, tripped over the window frame and said, "Crap!" Let''s just say he went back to wish for lots and lots of soap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so hairy, she got afros around her nipples!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This issue has been on my mind a lot lately. The lives of the innocent destroyed for the belief that they are mistakes. Many say that they''re inadequate and that they deserve to be sent away. I''m sure they have feelings, too, though! Sometimes I can''t eat or sleep because I think about them so much. It''s such an injustice! They were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Given no notice, they are swept right out of this world with such speed and are never heard from ever again. So many questions cloud my thoughts. How do they feel? Are they frightened or angry? Are they cold, lost and hungry? But the one question that I cannot find the answer to is: What happens to those poor letters who get deleted?!?!?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never have lunch with a chess player - I did once; there was a checkered tablecloth, and it took him half an hour to pass me the salt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pub landlord was delighted with the little puppy that he''d acquired, and the little puppy was very pleased with his new home. He''d run around the place, just a bundle of energy - very inquisitive, examining this, looking into that, non-stop all day, until the inevitable happened and he caught his tail in a fast-closing door and lost it! Time passed, and as one human year equals seven dog years, eventually he went to dog-heaven, for an endless supply of dog biscuits, walks in paradise - well, you couldn''t call it a dog''s life! However, he felt incomplete, and one night around midnight, he went back in his ghostly form to ask to be made whole again. "Sorry," said the landlord, "you know very well I can''t retail spirits after hours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grey hair is hereditary - you get it from your kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Momma is so poor, when i picked up a penny she said "You owe me my paycheck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old, when she was a kid the rainbows were black and white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a sock and a camera? One takes five toes and one takes photos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If this offends anyone, PM me. You know you''re a Mexican when... 1. Someone related to you has their name tattooed anywhere on their body. 2. Your family goes to the flea market in their Sunday''s best. 3. Your birthday doesn''t have cake, candy, and Coca-Cola but has fajitas, chicken, and tequila. 4. When you''ve seen your uncle wearing your "new" clothes. 5. Your favorite music is not rap, rock, pop, or oldies, but instead, Tejano.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is so house-proud, we live next door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent survey, 4% of men preferred fat legs; 6% preferred skinny legs; while 90% preferred something in between.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('E.T phone home! That must be one hell of a phone bill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a mathematician is an extrovert? He looks at *your* shoes when he talks to you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look at those ears! You have so much wax, that if I stuck a wick in there you would sing "Happy Birthday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two prostitutes moved to a new town, and on their first Sunday, went to church. One of the girls was quite proud of her singing; the other felt she couldn''t carry a tune in a bucket, so was quiet. After one desultory hymn, the priest berated the congregation, "Quite clearly, there are some who are singing, and some who are not. Can we please have a more concerted effort for the other hymns?" One whisper to her friend, "My word, how did he know about us so quickly?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde went into a restaurant and decided she was going to order the free birthday dessert, even though it wasn''t her birthday. A month later on her real birthday she went back to the restaurant with her family, and they had the same waiter. She ordered the dessert again and the waiter recognized her. This was her excuse: "Oh that wasn''t me that was my twin sister." Let''s just say she wasn''t going back anytime soon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a one-eyed dinosaur? Dyouthinkhesaurus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A red-head heard there was a party being held, but when she arrived, they wouldn''t let her in - it was a fancy-dress party! Disappointed but determined, she left, only to return shortly requesting admission. She was wearing only a pair of red gloves and a pair of red shoes and when she was asked what her fancy dress was, she stood with hands raised and said, "I''m the five of hearts, of course!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GOSSIP: something that no one claims to like but everyone enjoys. KISS: To a geographer: The shortest distance between two curves! To a physicist: The contradiction of mouth due to expansion of heart. To an accountant: A credit because it is profitable when returned. OBESITY: A surplus gone to waist. OLD AGE: When you wink at a woman and she says, "Anything wrong with your eye, Uncle?" RAINCOAT: Thunder wear! WRITER''S CRAMP: Authoritis! HEMOPHILLIA: A disease of blood with affinity (philia) to "he" (male) only.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy goes into a drug store and asks for deodorant. Assistant says, "Aerosol or ball-type?" to which he replies, "Neither, it''s for under my arms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Toothbrush: "I have the dirtiest job in the world" Toilet Paper: "Yeah...right"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock Who''s there? Some. Some who? Some asshole telling you knock, knock jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long he could suck it, Said he with a grin, As he wiped off his chin, If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly priests and a young novitiate were at the railway station to buy train tickets to Pittsburgh. The young lady selling tickets was very pretty, and was wearing a rather low-cut dress which showed her ample mammaries to great advantage. The novitiate approached the ticket booth and said, "Three tickets to Tittsville, please." "How dare you?" remonstrated the ticket seller. The young novitiate blushes and retires in confusion, so one of the priests says, "Allow me. Three pickets to Tittsburgh, and please may I have the change in nipples an dimes." He also retreats in embarrasment, so the eldest priest attempts to calm the now angry ticket seller. "Three tickets to Pittsburgh, please, and you should cover up more than you are, or Saint Finger is going to shake his peter at you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a girl from Darjeeling, Who could dance with exquisite feeling, There wasn''t a sound For miles around, Except fly buttons hitting the ceiling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John took Mary to the movies, and they both enjoyed the show very much. Afterwards, John asked Mary what she wanted to do; "I want to get weighed," she said. He took her to a drugstore, where the machine said she weighed 107 pounds, but for the rest of the night she pouted and sulked. When they finally got to her house, John tried to kiss her, but she said, "Go on home now, I''ve had a wowsy time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I lent a friend of mine $5000 for plastic surgery. I can''t get it back, because now I DON''T KNOW WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, they took her x-ray and a picture of a McDonald''s showed up on the screen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the last thing that goes through a fly''s mind when he hits your windshield? His asshole!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, the little boy from THE SIXTH SENSE walked up to her and said "Let me tell you my secret now...I see YOU...everywhere"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I were to be pun-ish-ed For every little pun I shed I''d hide me to a punny shed And there I''d hang my punnish head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(to be read aloud) ''Twas in a restaurant they met Romeo and Juliet But Romeo couldn''t pay the bill So Romee-owed what Julie ate ("ett").', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl goes to her doctor, because she''s found some unusual green marks on her thighs. After the doctor has examined the marks, she asks the girl some questions so that she can determine the cause. "Do you have a boyfriend?" "Yes." "Can you describe him?" "Ok; he''s tall, dark, and works at the fairground." "So he''s a traveller?" "Yes, he is; any problems?" "No, no. I do think his earrings may be made of brass, though."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Justin and Tarquin were having a wonderful time at the fairground, trying all the attractions, until they arrived at the carousel. Tarquin said, "Let''s go on this one, Justin." "I''m tired right now," said Justin, "you go ahead and I''ll see you later." So Tarquin goes on the carousel, but after a few minutes, the the carousel collapses in a heap. "Tarquin, Tarquin, are you all right?" calls Justin. "All right? Of course I''m not all right; seven times I went past you, and you didn''t wave once!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The masked and armed man entered the bank. "Nobody move, or you''re geography!" shouts the bandit. One of the tellers says, "Don''t you mean ''history''?" "Don''t change the subject!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do black people wear hats with such big bills? So birds don''t shit on their lips', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant woman was on a bus. As the bus was going along, the woman started to give birth. An off-duty doctor rushed to her side and started to help her. He shouted to the rest of the bus, "Can someone help me?" Then towards the back of the bus a blond got up and smashed the back window. The doctor turned to her and said, "What did you do that for?" The blond replied, "Well it said on the window, In emergency, break glass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family was eating out at a restaurant. The waiter who had been standing by them said in quite an upset manner "Well I guess I''m gonna go home, make myself a cold tuna sandwich, watch the news, and then cry myself to sleep again." The mother of the family looks at him in pity and says " would you like to join us?" The waiter shouts back, "Did you not just hear me?! I have an evening planned!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s gray and comes in packets? Instant elephant. What''s gray and comes in buckets? An elephant. What''s gray and has a trunk? A mouse going on holiday. How do elephants hide in cherry trees? They paint their toe-nails red. How do elephants get down from cherry trees? Sit on a leaf and wait for fall. How do elephants hide in custard? Paint the soles of their feet yellow and hide upside down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, an American and a Frenchman were discussing a good example of savoir-faire. "Ok," said the Englishman, "if you came home and found your wife in bed with another man and you didn''t kill him, that to me, is savoir-faire." "Not quite, fellas," said the American. "If you came home and found your wife in bed with another man and you said, ''Please carry on'', that''s savoir-faire." "Mais non," said the Frenchman. "If you came home and found your wife in bed with another man and you said, ''Please carry on'', and he could, that''s savoir-faire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present. "Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?" Five small voices answered in unison: "Okay, Dad, you get the toy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-- Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs. -- Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained. -- Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. -- Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk. -- Negl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher. The note read: Bill Jones having gone to sea, his wife desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety. Failing to observe the punctuation, he startled his audience by announcing: Bill Jones, having gone to see his wife, desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat you were born in the middle of the ocean!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so big, the Apollo 13 crashed into her head, right before it landed on the moon! Maybe that explains why she''s so stupid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An off-duty police officer, familiar with radar guns, drove through a school zone within the legal speed limit when the flash of a camera went off, taking a picture of his license plate. The officer, thinking the radar was in error, drove by again; even more slowly. Another flash. He did it again for a third time, at an even slower speed. Same result. "This guy must have screwed up the settings," the off-duty officer thought. A few weeks later, when he received the violations in the mail, he discovered three traffic tickets: each for not wearing a seat belt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After trying a new shampoo for the first time, a guy fired off an enthusiastic letter of approval to the manufacturer. Several weeks later he came home from work to a large carton in the middle of the floor. Inside were free samples of the many products the company produced: soaps, detergents, tooth paste, and paper items. "Well, what do you think?" his wife asked smiling. "Next time," he replied. "I''m writing to General Motors!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bet it was really tough being an Apostle of Jesus. What if you wanted a day off? You ring up Jesus and say, "Jesus, I''m sick today, running a little fever and feeling congested so I won''t be able to make it to today''s sermon. What...? Say that again...? I''m cured?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a small town, farmers of the community had gotten together to discuss some important issues. About midway through the meeting, a wife of one of the farmers stood up and spoke her piece. When she was done, one of the old farmers stood up and said, "What does she know about anything? I would like to ask her if she knows how many toes a pig has?" Quick as a flash, the woman replied, "Take off your boots sir, and count them yourself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jt/xmktp?akhjgp/uqpuRujgrt/pvP/tq/tkHqtjhqtjb!)<(]{,twmjtwmjtwmkadnjgptkgptjafmjipV9mkBRiECl88888888888888888888888888888888888888887777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777I won at the slots! modge???? i m ?!?! bubbye *cheffy!=', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat, that she goes to the zoo to see the elephants and they feed her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so fat that people call her fat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she has her own gravitational pull!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Money can''t buy everything... but then again, neither can no money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area. The judge asked him if he had anything to say in his defense. "They should not put up such misleading notices," said Joe. "It said, FINE FOR PARKING HERE."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('gun(which shoots bees)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our house, in the middle of my feet, Our house, which smells of cheesy feet, Our house, will always get defeat, Our house, will never eat those feet. That was a song I made up ha!!!!!! ha!!!!!! ha!!!!!! ha!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she saw a Snickers commercial on TV...it said "Hungry? Why wait?"...so she ate the TV.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('OK, said the psychiatrist, "let''s try some tests. I''ll draw something, and you say what it reminds you of." He draws a house, and the patient says, "Sex." He draws a square, and the patient says, "Sex." He draws a circle, and the patient says, "Sex." He draws a trangle, and the patient says, "Sex." He draws a diamond, and the patient says, "Sex." "I see; it seems to me," says the trick-cyclist,"you have a fixation with sex." "Me? Who''s drawing all these dirty pictures?" ----------------------------------------------------- A man is referred to a psychiatrist because he imagines himself to be a pet dog. "All right, lie on the couch," says the doctor. "Sorry, I''m not allowed on the furniture!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Legs is the word - spread the word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Okay sooo.. I kinda stumbled across this "word" when I was actually at the sprint store with my x-boyfriend. He was talking about how he needed to get unlimited text messaging and I looked over with a very concerned look on my face and said, "Yardy Yar!" I believe everyone in the store was hysterical and looked at me as if I was some crazy redneck - it was hilarious. If you don''t get it, it is supposed to sound like - "You already are." It''s actually pretty dang funny if you say it out loud!! haha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she walked in front of the T.V and your dad missed the whole series of "Lost"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat you can roll over twice and still be on the bitch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the urging of his doctor, Bill moved to Texas. After settling in, he met a neighbor who was also an older man. "Say, is this really a healthy place?" "It sure is," the man replied. "When I first arrived here I couldn''t say one word. I had hardly any hair on my head. I didn''t have the strength to walk across a room and I had to be lifted out of bed." "That''s wonderful!" said Bill. "How long have you been here?" "I was born here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she jumped of the Golden Gate bridge in San Fransisco and baptised England.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the senior citizens'' monthly bus trip, and the new driver, a great deal younger than their usual driver, a sedate 50-something, was careering down winding roads at quite a pace. The volunteer who was accompanying them was a little flustered, and with an embarrassed laugh, said to the old lady across the aisle, "Some speed, eh, Mrs. Jones?" "I don''t know about the others," she replied, "but I certainly have!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhowkajdjfhemfkucwrhynktjhncskhxctmcqjkhrnwuemhvtwujhmdjkwvnhtfuckfuckfuckfucksfghehfjnhjzjyh,fmjnhvyjnhmynjhctjmnhcjygcnjrhtkfhgimkkjnhmkjnhgmnjhnjynb,j', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marigold, I''m sorry. I hacked into xizle''s account ''cause I''m a stupid mother fuckin'' piece of shit!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DELETE THIS NOW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz poo on marigold abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING= SOME PEOPLE MAY FIND THIS JOKE A BIT RACIST OR OFFENSIVE. I MEAN NO OFFENCE TO ANYBODY WHO READS THIS. Q: How do you start a rush hour in Bangladesh? A: Roll a penny down the street!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I AM NOT A RACIST PERSON, I JUST FIND THIS FUNNY. There was once a rich pakistani. His name was Azif. (As if)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two thieves? A pair of knickers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i want to live in a big castle and to be a princess', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When does Saddam Hussein have his lunch? When Tariq Aziz. (When Tariq has his)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede? A: Bacon and legs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sheep with no eyes? A blind sheep (what else?)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mommma is so skinny when she went to the strip club they used her as the pole!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a good trick to try on people... Say to them: "I''m going to ask you two questions. one you have to answer yes, the other you have to answer no. 1st question: Are you stupid? <(you can put in anything you want here) 2nd question: Are you a liar?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Because I had forgotten the dates for a number of my friends'' and relatives'' birthdays and anniversaries, I decided to compile a list on the computer and have the dates highlighted on screen when the machine was turned on. I went to a number of computer stores to find a software program that would do the job but had no luck at the first few. I finally found one where the clerk seemed experienced. "Can you recommend something that will remind me of birthdays and anniversaries?" I asked. "Have you tried WIFE?" he replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Betcha I can give up gambling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am sure most people have heard of or watched the popular show the Ozbournes and still more people have Heard Ozzy sing. My question is how can Ozzy sing if he can''t talk???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man who died and went to heaven. There he saw a hot babe and a ladder. The babe said "you can have sex with me or climb the ladder to success." The man climbed the ladder. There he saw an even hotter babe who said the same thing. He climbed the ladder again. He saw yet another ladder and an even hotter babe, hotter than the previous ones. She said the same thing. So the man climbed the ladder one more time. This time he saw an extremely ugly man. The ugly man said "Hi, I''m Sess, suck me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sailor came home from his 5-year sea voyage, and had two bird-cages with him. He holds them up, and says to his wife, "Do you want the parrot, or do you want the cockatoo?" She replies, "I''ll have the parrot, I''ve had a cockatoo while you were away!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandma Jones from the valley had never experienced a sick day in her life, so she didn''t take it kindly when a bad case of the mulligrubs sent her to the hospital for observation. By the time a pair of husky interns got Grandma tucked into bed, she had managed to complain about everything: the temperature, the lights, the skimpy gown, the food and the mattress, especially, the mattress. Suddenly, Grandma spotted a small plastic item with a button, attached to a cord. "What''s that?" she demanded. "If you need anything in the middle of the night, Grandma," said one of the interns, "just press that button." "What does it do, ring a bell?" she asked. "No, it turns on a light in the hall for the nurse on duty," the intern replied. "A light in the hall?" responded Grandma. "Look, I''m the sick one around here. If the night nurse needs a light on in the hall, she can get up and switch it on herself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A small boy was looking at the red ripe tomatoes growing in the farmer''s garden. "I''ll give you my two pennies for that tomato," said the boy pointing to a beautiful, large, ripe fruit hanging on the vine. "No," said the farmer, "I get a dime for a tomato like that one." The small boy pointed to a smaller green one, "Will you take two pennies for that one?" "Yes," replied the farmer, "I''ll give you that one for two cents." "OK," said the lad, sealing the deal by putting the coins in the farmer''s hand, "I''ll pick it up in about a week."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did God make man first? Because he didn''t want to be interrupted by woman!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ll get a world record for this. It''s fireproof. He''s probably just hibernating. I''m making a citizen''s arrest. So, you''re a cannibal. Are you sure the power is off? Yeah, I made the deciding vote on the jury, so what of it? I''ve seen this done on TV. These are the good kind of mushrooms. Let it down slowly. Rat poison only kills rats. Just take whatever you want, this is a ghost town. It''s strong enough for both of us. This doesn''t taste right. Nice doggie. I''ve done this before. Well, we''ve made it this far. That''s odd. Don''t be so superstitious.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two ships, one carrying lots of red paint, the other carrying lots of purple paint, crashed on a desert island. The drivers are now marooned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends were out shooting birds. A bird flew from behind a tree and quick as a flash one man shot it. It uttered a squawk, folded its wings and fell to the ground. The other man turned to him and said: " You didn''t need to shoot that bird. The fall would have killed it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a leg and an egg? You can beat an egg up, but you can''t beat a leg up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story. This happened many years ago, and was told me by a man with spare time on his hands, who used to spectate in court to pass some of that spare time. Lawyer - "You say you saw the defendant''s car involved in a road accident at the junction of X and Y?" Policeman - "That is correct." L - "And where were you at this time?" P - "At the junction of X and Z." L - "So you were some 80 yards away when the incident occurred?" P - "Yes, I was." L, in incredulous accent - "So you were 80 yards away, but you say you knew this vehicle had been involved in an accident?" P - "Yes." L - "Then please tell the court how you knew this vehicle went through a red light?" P - "Because the light that I could see was green." L, triumphantly - "Ah, but how did you know that it had been in an accident?" P - "Because it went past on its roof."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you were born, God admitted that even he sometimes made mistakes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How does a blonde moon walk? A: She pulls down her panties and slides her ass along the floor!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, brunette, and redhead all go into a building to take an emergency course. After a few minutes of introductions, the instructor of the course starts to talk about fire. "Wherever you see a fire, you need to call 911, imediately." After an hour or so of the lecture, the brunette makes an excuse to get out of there, by saying she needs a drink. 2 minutes later she comes running back in, with fire fighters behind her, and she yells, "There''s a fire!" They all run out, and after a few minutes the fire fighters come back out, and say, "We can not find a fire." The blonde suddenly screams out "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT" she gestures towards the redhead, "THE FIRE IS ON HER HEAD."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her husband go to buy her new clothes. First, they decide she needs a new shirt, so they go through a few shirts but she rejects them all. Finally she points at one that she likes, but he thinks it is ugly, so he says no. They go through almost the whole store, and she says no to all of the shirts. Bored and annoyed, the husband finally goes up to the shirt she likes and generously "Fine, do you want this polo shirt?" The wife thinks for a few seconds and says "Oh, it''s a polo shirt? In that case no, I''m really not into sports."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should you give a man who has everything? A woman to show him how to work it. What''s the quickest way to a man''s heart? Straight through the rib cage. Why can''t men get mad cow disease? Because they''re all pigs. What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner? A power failure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than taking a bite out of an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it is dry - moisten. If it is moist - dry. Congratulations, you are now a dermatologist. ==================================================== What''s the difference between a general practitioner and a specialist? One treats what you have, the other thinks you have what he treats.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. Indecision is the key to flexibility. Hang in there, retirement is only 30 years away! Aim low; reach your goals; avoid disappointment. Teamwork means never having to take the blame yourself. A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat. If at first you don''t succeed, try management.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius asks: "If a train station is where the train stops, and a bus station is where the bus stops, what is a work station?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THIS IS A TRUE STORY!!! My cousin works as a technical support receptionist at a computer company. This is an actual conversation he had one day: "Hi, I''m having trouble with my computer. It''s not working!" "Well, I''ll do my best to help you." *gets technical information for computer from caller* "OK, can you press ''Control'', then hold down ''Alt'' and, then ''Delete''?" "Hey, it''s in French!" "What is?" "The keyboard?" "*sigh* Well, can you press..." "Oh, darn, I just noticed, the power''s off!" "Well, can you turn it on, please?" "How?" "Press the power button." "Where is it?" "It''s normally a big button on the actual computer, not the monitor." "Like the lizard?" "Pardon me?" "Oh, OK, I got it." "OK, now press ''Control'' and then ''I''..." " ''I'' as in Isabel or ''I'' as in Irene?" And so on and so on..... :) Customers can be so...difficult...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in Target the other day, shopping with a young lady friend. We were walking past the furniture section where there were several different models of bar stools on display. Next to them there was a sign that read: "All models in stock now!" So I paused next to the display and said, "Do you know what these are?" "What?" she asked. I said, "Stool samples."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was buying a horse and was given a few simple instructions. To make the horse walk, he would say "few." To make the horse run, he would say "many." To make the horse stop he would say "amen." On the man''s first ride all was going well. "few!" the man shouted and the horse began to walk. "many!" the man shouted and the horse began to run. But the man had forgotten the word to make the horse stop as it ran towards the edge of a cliff. The man shouted in terror "Lord! Please save me! Amen!" And of course the horse stopped right at the edge of the cliff-face. The man then mopped his brow and said "Phew! that was clo- AAAAARRRRGHHH!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last time my friend went to the zoo, he got in trouble for feeding the monkeys... ...to the lions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man 1: "My budgie lays square eggs!" Man 2: "Really! That''s amazing! Can it talk as well?" Man 1: "Yes, but only one word." Man 2: "What''s that?" Man 1: "Ouch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look at the speed of that plane! said one hawk to another, as a jet fighter plane hurtled over their heads. "Hmph!" snorted the other, "You too would fly fast if your tail was on fire!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two neighbours were talking to each other. One said to the other "Have you told your son to stop imitating me?" The other one replied "Yes. Yesterday I went up to him and said ''Stop acting such a fool!''..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife: Will you love me when I''m old and ugly? Husband: Darling, of course I do...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking through the desert, when he found a woman buried up to her neck. The woman asks him to dig her out, and he says, "What''s in it for me?" She replies, "Sand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so short, you can see her feet on her driving licence!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s lips so big, she can whisper in her own ear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Soon after our last child left home for college, my husband was resting next to me on the couch with his head in my lap. I carefully removed his glasses. "You know, honey," I said sweetly, "Without your glasses you look like the same handsome young man I married." "Honey," he replied with a grin, "Without my glasses, you still look pretty good, too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I say! Look here! said an angry member of the grouse-shooting party. "You nearly shot my wife!" "I''m terribly sorry," replied the offender, "shall I try again?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display. "I have good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work, and wondered if they would increase in value after your death. When I told him they would, he bought all 15 of your paintings." "That''s great news," the artist said. "What''s the bad news?" "He was your doctor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a bad lawyer and a good lawyer? A bad lawyer can have a case drag on for several years. A good lawyer can make it last even longer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young reporter was sent on his first assignment. He sent in the following report to the office - "Mrs. Smith was injured in a car accident today. She is recovering in County Hospital with cuts on her breasts." The editor scolded the new reporter, "This is a family paper. we don''t use words like ''breasts'' around here. Go back and write something more appropriate!" The young reporter thought for a few minutes, and finally sent in this report - "Mrs. Smith was injured in a car accident today. She is recovering in County Hospital with cuts on her ( . ) ( . )."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was travelling at 180 miles per hour on a motorway and was pulled over by the traffic police. The man asked: "Sorry officer, was I driving too fast?" The policeman replied, "No, you were flying too low..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sticks and stones won''t break my bones but yo momma will when she gets on top!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man 1: "Why have you painted your car red on one side and blue on the other?" Man 2: "So that if I bang into anyone, the witnesses will have a marvellous time in court contradicting each other!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man at the movies had left his seat to buy an ice-cream. On his return he said to an old lady sitting at the end of the row, "I''m sorry, but did I step on your toe a minute ago?" The woman angrily replied "Yes, you certainly did!" "Oh," said the man, "Then this is my row."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The woman in a theatre box-office was surprised one evening just before the show at the behavior of one man. He bought a ticket, went away, and then returned a few minutes later to buy another one. He went away again, returned and bought a third ticket. Then he went away yet again, returned and bought a fourth ticket! By now the show had started, so the woman in the box-office said "I hope you don''t mind me asking, but why do you keep coming back and buying more tickets?" "Every time I try to get in to the auditorium," he replied, "some jerk takes my ticket and tears it in half!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl 1: "This morning my dad gave me soap-flakes instead of corn flakes for breakfast!" Girl 2: "I bet you were angry with him!" Girl 1: "Angry?! I was foaming at the mouth!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom: "Why have you been sent home early, Jack?" Jack: "Because the boy next to me was smoking." Mom: "But if he was smoking, why were you sent home?" Jack: "Because I set him on fire!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "Simon! What does it mean if the barometer falls?" Simon: "Err.. The nail''s come out of the wall, miss?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Coming home from his Little League game, Billy swung open the front door very excited. Unable to attend the game, his father immediately wanted to know what happened. ''So, how did you do, son?'' he asked. ''You''ll never believe it!'' Billy said. ''I was responsible for the winning run!'' ''Really? How''d you do that?'' ''I dropped the ball.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking down a street when he sees a blonde couple who looked extremely happy. He goes up to them and asks: "Why are you guys so happy?" The couple says "We just finished a puzzle that took us 3 years!" "3 years!" the man said "It doesn''t take that long to do a puzzle." "Oh yes it does" said the couple "It said so right on the side of the box 2 to 3 years...!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have reached the Strategic Air Command Nuclear Missile Storage Facility. We are unable to come to the phone right now. At the tone, please leave your name, number, and target or list of targets, and we''ll launch as soon as we can. And have a nice day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In answer to the question "What''s wrong?" The wife says: The same old thing. The wife means: Nothing. The wife says: Nothing. The wife means: Everything. The wife says: Nothing, really. The wife means: It''s just that you''re an idiot. The wife says: I don''t want to talk about it. The wife means: I''m still building up steam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop pulled over two drunks, and asked to the first, "What''s your name and address?" "I''m Paddy O''Day, of no fixed address." The cop turned to the second drunk, and asked the same question. "I''m Seamus O''Toole, and I live in the flat above Paddy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people ask the secret of Anthony''s long marriage. They take time to go to a restaurant two times a week: a little candlelight dinner, soft music, and a slow walk home. The Mrs. goes Tuesdays; He goes Fridays.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The crowd had cornered a woman and was preparing to stone her. Jesus raised his hand and spake, "Let he among you who is without sin cast the first stone." From the back of the crowd a small woman picked up a huge rock and staggered toward the poor victim. Jesus pointed a finger at her and said, "Stop it MOM! I was just trying to make a point!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bought the wife a hamster fur coat for her birthday, she was delighted with it. We went to the fair; took me 4 hours to get her off the big wheel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two eggs were in a pan of boiling water. One egg says, "Phew, it''s hot in here!" The other egg replies, "Wait till we get out of here, they smash your head in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a farmer who grew watermelons, and every week he would check on his crop, and would find that the local kids had got into his field and eaten as many watermelons as they could. This went on for some time, and eventually the man got fed up replacing the missing watermelons. After some thought, he came up with an idea. He made a sign and placed it in the field; the sign read, "Warning! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide!" He feels pleased with himself, thinking that will stop the theft of his crop. A couple of days later, he returns, and the watermelons are all there; but in the distance, he sees another sign. He walks over to the sign, and reads, "Now there are two!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pete''s at work when he realises he''s forgotten to ask his wife, Alison, where he should pick her up after work. He calls home, and after several seconds, Ali answers the phone. Pete asks his question, and Ali shouts, "You got me out of the bath to ask me that? I dashed to the phone; I haven''t even got a towel over me, I''m dripping water in the hall! Pick me up in the square at 5.30!" As soon as Ali tells him she''s naked and wet in the hall, an evil thought occurs to him. "I''m terribly sorry to have got you out of the bath; ok, see you at 5.30 then." As he hangs up, he calls to his mate, Mark, and outlines his plan, and starts to dial his home number, then gives Mark the phone. When Ali answers the phone, Mark says, "Hi, Ali, is Pete ho... Oh, look at you! and all wet, too!" "Ahhhh...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack hadn''t been to a school reunion in decades. When he walked in, Jack thought he recognised a woman over in the corner, so he approached her and extended his hand in greeting. "You look like Helen Brown," he remarked. "Well", replied the angry woman, "you don''t look so great in blue either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a couple of rabbits found themselves being chased by a pack of wolves. They dashed into a thicket, and stood there panting. "So," gasped one to the other, "do you think we should keep running, or stay here until we outnumber them?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winston Churchill (whose mother was American) was Prime Minister of Britain during World War II. These are some insults he was involved in - Lady Astor "Winston, if you were my husband, I would put poison in your coffee." Winston Churchill "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it!" Bessie Braddock "Winston, you''re drunk!" Winston "Bessie, you are ugly, but tomorrow morning, I shall be sober!" Bernard Shaw sent Churchill two tickets to a first night, with a note saying "Bring a friend if you have one." Churchill replied, saying that he could not attend the first night as he was busy, and asked for tickets for the second night "If you have one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a men''s outfitters and grumpily asks to see the cheapest suit in the shop. The horrified snooty sales assistant immediately fetched a full length mirror and placed it in front of him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Special bonus, two for the price of one! The party was in full swing, the drink going down several well-lubricated throats. One of the guests was a Scot, wearing the traditional kilt, and a couple of the more adventurous girls were teasing him, asking him if anything was worn under his kilt. He replied, "No, everything is in perfect working order," and with that, he lifted his kilt to give them a quick flash. "Oh, it''s gruesome," said one of the girls. "Have another look," he says, "it''s grew some more!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes went out into the woods on a hunting trip. They are out there for several hours, and discover that they are lost! One says, "I heard that if you''re lost in the woods, you fire three shots in the air, and wait for someone to come and rescue you." "Ok," says her pal, "let''s do it." So they did, and waited to be rescued, but no-one came to their aid, so after an hour, they fired three more shots in the air, and waited again. It''s nearly dark by now, and one says to the other, "I hope someone comes soon, we''re down to our last three arrows."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows eating grass, On a warm, sunny hillock. By this time tomorrow, That grass will be millock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Albert Einstein was getting bored with making the same speech over and over again at different meetings, so one night, after a long day, his chauffeur jokingly said, "I''ve heard your speech so many times, I know it word for word! Why don''t you take the night off and let me deliver the talk this evening?" Einstein agreed. When they arrived at the venue, Einstein put on the chauffeur''s uniform and hat, and sat at the back of the hall while the chauffeur took his place on the podium, effortlessly delivering the speech, then inviting the audience to ask questions. He convincingly answered the first few, but then one pompous man stood up and asked a very difficult question on his theories of relativity. The chauffeur was flummoxed, but calmly said, "Why, that question is so very easy, I will let my chauffeur answer it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blond: Daddy! I know my alphabet! Dad: That took you 5 yaars! Blond: I know, but now I know my ABD''s!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde had twin girls - she called them Kate and Duplicate. Then she had twin boys - she called them Pete and Repeat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(9i)]-[cos(xy)/1096x]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t lobsters share? They''re shellfish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good insult: Your mom goes to college! Good comeback: How do you know? Stalker!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so short when she falls of the curb it sounds like aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she thought innuendo was an Italian suppository.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My granddad was a very unlucky man. He made a soft drink, and called it 1-up, but it didn''t sell. He made another, called it 2-up, which also didn''t sell. He tried yet another, called it 3-up. He got to 6-up, and quit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that every time we blow our noses, we look inside the tissue afterwards? Are we expecting something other than boogers? Or are we checking to make sure they have not run off?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok. I honestly saw this on a billboard: Illiterate? Call this number to learn how to read.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy turns up at school very late one morning, and the teacher asks the reason why he''s late. "Sorry, Miss, my dad got burned." "I''m sorry to hear that; I hope it''s not serious," she replies. "Oh, they don''t piss about at the crematorium, Miss!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into the doctor''s surgery and said, "Doctor, every time I break wind it sounds like a motor bike." "That''s very interesting; is there anything else bothering you?" asked the doctor. "I also have a large boil on my backside," said the man. "Right," said the doctor, "I will lance your boil and your problem will disappear." "How''s that?" asked the man. "Because abscess makes the fart go Honda."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to a fancy dress party, dressed from head to toe in green, carrying a woman on his back. The host asks, "What have you come as?" He replies, "I''m a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle!" The host says, "Why have you a woman on your back?" "Oh, that''s Michelle," he replies. (My shell)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kangaroos were living in a zoo pen with a 20-foot high fence. One morning, both kangaroos were found wandering around the zoo, and were quickly put back in their pen, and the fence was put up to 30 feet. Next morning, they were found outside again, so the fence was made 40 feet high. The fence got up to 60 feet, and still the kangaroos were outside in the morning. One kangaroo says to the other, "How high will they make this fence, do you think?" "Don''t know," says the second. "Depends when they discover they''re not locking the gate." An elephant walks into a pub and orders a drink. He''s sipping his beer when a man starts playing the piano. The elephant looks over, and bursts into tears. "Why are you crying?" asks the barman. "Does the tune have some special significance for you?" "No," wails the elephant, "it''s just that I recognize the keys!" (Ivory!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama is so old, her breast-milk is powder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she blocks the sun when she''s out walking!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You call me ugly? Where is your mirror, boy?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never buy a toothbrush at a yard sale. Never buy a parachute that was used once and never opened before. Never sell computers for free at your garage sale. Trust me, there are many more ways to demolish your house. Never put bathroom humor up on the internet. Never watch American Idol auditions with Coke in your mouth. Never watch American Idol auditions without a couple of aspirins. And never, ever catch your grandparents taking a shower. All of these words of advice were found out by first-hand experience.If you want to meet the guy brave enough to try all of these "stunts" out, go to the Almont Graveyard in Stamfort, Michigan and visit the grave entitled:"Dave ''Daredevil'' Deatson". Or visit his grandparents in jail on Alcatraz Prison, California.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so poor her front door and back door are in the same room. Yo Momma so poor she kicked a can across the street and a man asked "what are you doing?" and she said "I''m moving."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walked into a bar, and asked the barman for a double entendre, so he gave her one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, please, I have a problem pronouncing Ts, Fs and Hs! "Well then, you can''t say fairer than that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A women said to her boyfriend "Oh, honey... are we doing anything this weekend?" Her boyfriend on the other side of the room said "Yeah, of course" The woman said "Oh, honey. That''s great! What are we doing?" "Sunday... it''s just you, me, the T.V., and that big comfy couch!" he said. "Oh, honey... does this mean what I think it means!?" she said. She jumped up excitedly. "Oh, honey... you want to watch the Super Bowl too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. He says, "My dog''s cross-eyed, can you do something for him?" "Let''s have a look at him," says the vet, as he picks up the dog, examines his eyes, and checks his teeth. "I''m going to have to put him down," he finally says. "What?" says the man, "just because he''s cross-eyed?" "No," replies the vet, "because he''s really heavy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The class homework was to write about something unusual that had happened in the previous month. Little Johnny stood up to read his: "Daddy fell in the well last week," he began. "Good heavens," shrieked Mrs. Johnson, the teacher. "Is he all right now?" "He must be," said Timmy. "He stopped yelling for help yesterday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and notices that there is a game of poker taking place at a table in the corner of the room. To his amazement, one of the players is a German Shepherd, studying his hand intently. He asks the barman, "Is that dog actually playing poker?" "He certainly is, sir," replies the barman. "I am amazed," said the man. "Oh, it''s quite true, every night, the same group comes in here and they all play poker." "Does the dog win much?" asks the man. "No, he''s terrible, every time he gets a good hand, his tail starts to wag!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an Alabama farmer with two black sheep under each arm? A: A pimp', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went out to buy a new television, and wanted to buy a locally-made set. The salesman showed me a set I quite liked, and he assured me it was made locally, but I saw through that - clearly printed on the box was "Built in Antenna."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your brain was dynamite, you wouldn''t have enough to blow your hat off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every village has its idiot. Somewhere in Texas, a village is missing theirs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A paper bag goes to his doctor, who says; "Your test results are back, and I''m afraid I have bad news. You have AIDS. "That''s impossible," cried the paper bag, "I''ve not had any form of sexual contact, nor am I a drug user!" "In that case," said the doctor, "your father must have been a carrier."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father and son went fishing one summer day. While they were out in the boat, the boy became curious about the world around him. He asked his father, "Dad, how does this boat float?" "Don''t rightly know, son." "Dad, how do fish breath underwater?" "Don''t rightly know, son." "Dad, why is the sky blue?" "Don''t rightly know, son." Eventually, after the boy asked his father several more questions, "Dad, do you mind me asking all these questions?" "Of course not, son. If you don''t ask questions, you never learn anything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sally "Mummy, why can''t I go swimming in the sea?" Mum "Because there are sharks in the sea." Sally "But mummy, daddy is swimming in the sea." Mum "That''s different, he''s insured."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you let your thirteen-year-old daughter smoke at the table in front of HER two kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three women that had just escaped from jail, one was a brunette, one was a red-head, and one was a blonde. They were running through the woods and the police and their dogs were chasing after them. The women ran into three empty potato sacks. They decided to hide. A policeman found the sacks and decided to give the first one a kick. It meowed. "Aww, it''s a sack full of kittens," he said. He kicked the second bag and it barked. "Aww, it''s a sack full of puppies," he said. He kicked the third one and it didn''t do anything. He kicked it again and it didn''t do anything. He was about to kick it again when the blonde popped out of it and said, "I can''t act like potatoes if you keep kicking me, duh!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke may seem racist to some. I just wanted to warn you of this before you read it. Sally - Where does a baby go after he or she has passed away? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - To heaven. What does the baby get after he or she arrives in heaven? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - Wings. What is the baby called? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - An Angel. Where does a black baby go after he or she has passed away? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - To heaven. What does the baby get after he or she arrives in heaven? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - Wings. What is the baby called? Joe - A bat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it''s too far to walk. What do you call a bright, sunny day that comes after two cold, cloudy days? Monday. A snake slithers into a bar. The barman says, "I can''t serve you, you obviously can''t hold your drink." Which side of a chicken has the most feathers? The outside. Two parrots on a perch. One says, "Do you smell fish?" An eel slithers into a bar. The barman says, "I can''t serve you, you''re legless."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t dogs allowed in the White House? They might pee on the Bush!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('this site is awesome! look 4 the difference between the pics! http://members.home.nl/saen/Special/Zoeken.swf', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Who who. Who who who? Is there an owl in here?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Amos. Amos who? Amosquito bit me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Moo, moo, who. Moo, moo, who, who? Well, make up your mind, are you a cow or an owl?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Toulose. Toulose who? I don''t want to lose to anybody!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Are you, Are you who? Are you going to let me in or not?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Yudare. Yudare who? You dare to disturb me,while I am sleeping?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid, she got lost in a parking lot!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was assigned a paper on childbirth and asked his parents, "How was I born?" "Well honey..." said the slightly prudish parent, "the stork brought you to us." "Oh," said the boy. "Well, how did you and daddy get born?" he asked. "Oh, the stork brought us too." "Well how were grandpa and grandma born?" he persisted. "Well darling, the stork brought them too!" said the parent, by now starting to squirm a little in the Lazy Boy recliner. Several days later, the boy handed in his paper to the teacher who read with confusion the opening sentence: "This report has been very difficult to write due to the fact that there hasn''t been a natural childbirth in my family for three generations."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A calendar something that goes in one year and out the other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ethel and Bunty were getting just a little bored in the senior citizens'' home, when Bunty had an idea. "I bet you $100 that you won''t streak round the garden, Ethel." "You have got a bet," replies Ethel, so she disrobes and sets off round the garden. Tom and Bob were enjoying a relaxing time in the garden when Ethel went past. Bob says, "Wasn''t that Ethel that went by?" Tom replies, "Yes, I do believe it was." "What was she wearing then?" "I don''t know," said Tom, "but it surely needed ironing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a dentist''s and says, "Can you help me? I think I''m a moth." The dentist says, "You need a psychiatrist, mate." The man says, "Yes, I know." The dentist replies, "Well, why have you come in here?" "Your light was on!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a book called "How to Hug," and when I got it home, found it was volume 7 of an encyclopedia. I phoned the gym, and asked if they could teach me to do the splits. The girl asked if I was flexible, and I said I couldn''t do Tuesdays.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman in a cafe had ordered turtle soup, but changed her mind and asked for pea soup instead. She heard the waiter call, "Hold the turtle, make it pea!" At the next table, a man ordered the fish, but when the waiter brought it, he was holding the fish on the plate. When asked why he was holding it on the plate, he said he didn''t want it to fall on the floor again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a part in the local repertory company''s Shakespeare week, and was allocated the dressing room that was next to the large room shared by three of the actresses. One day, a friend of mine was visiting me when he drew my attention to the fact that there was a small hole in the dividing wall. "You can see right through into next door!" he exclaimed. "Ah, let ''em look," I said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. On a mall child''s cart bag Do not put child in bag (Who does?) 2. On food court restaurant counters Warning: Touching hot surfaces may burn you (Wanna try?) 3a. Bush on war in Iraq "We''re not going to have any casualties." (Where are we now, huh?) 3b. Bush''s description of the White House "It is white." (WOW! Who knew???) 3c. Our future "The future will look better tommorow." (That settles it, we''re all gonna die.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A child custody case was held in court. The judge felt that the mother and father were both fit to be parents and therefore couldn''t decide who he should grant full custody to. So he asks the little boy, "Would you like to live with your mother?" "No," said the boy. "Why not?" said the judge. "Because she beats me." The judge says, "Okay, then you''ll go live with your father." "Oh, no," cried the boy, "he beats me too." Dumbfounded, the judge asks "Okay, who do you want to live with?" "I want to live with the New York Yankees." "Why?" asks the judge. "They don''t beat anybody."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a major difference between the way a dog thinks and the way a cat thinks. A dog says, "You feed me, shelter me, pamper me, and love me. You must be God." A cat says, "You feed me, shelter me, pamper me, and love me. I must be God."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have to see this joke to believe it. - Editor''s Note: Link Deleted -', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a cheetah with a hamburger? Fast food!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don''t work. Why is a river rich? Because it has two banks. What is a foreign ant called? Import-ant. What do ants take when they are ill? Anti-biotics.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the fastest way to double your money? By folding it in half', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one glass say to another glass? Lets have a break. What did one ghost say to another ghost? Do you believe in people? What did one chair say to another chair? Here comes another bum.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the similarity between Michael Jackson and a Playstation 2? They both are made of plastic, and they both get turned on by kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''Doctor,doctor.I think that I''m a bridge.'' ''What on earth''s come over you?'' ''Well a car,a bike.....''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One afternoon, a woman was in her back yard hanging laundry when a tired-looking dog wandered into the yard. The woman could tell from the dog''s collar and well-fed belly that he had a home. But when she walked into the house, the dog followed her, sauntered down the hall and fell asleep in a corner. An hour later, he went to the door, and the woman let him out. The next day the dog was back. He resumed his position in the hallway and slept for an hour. This continued for several weeks. Curious, the woman finally pinned a note to his collar, it read: ''Every afternoon, your dog comes to my house for a nap.'' The next day he arrived with a different note pinned to his collar: "We have six children. He''s trying to catch up on his sleep."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to do some errands, so the proud father stayed home to watch his wonderful new son. Soon after the mother left, the baby started to cry. The father did everything he could think of, but the baby just wouldn''t stop crying. Finally, the dad got so worried he decided to take the infant to the doctor. After the doctor listened to all the father had done to get the baby to stop crying, the doctor began to examine the baby''s ears, chest and then down to the diaper area. When he opened the diaper, he found was indeed full. "Here''s the problem," the doctor explained. "He just needs to be changed." The perplexed father remarked, "But the diaper package specifically says it''s good for up to 10 pounds!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A merger has been announced between the California Highway Patrol (CHiPs) and the California Fish and Game Department. It will be called Fish and Chips.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to walk into Target one day... I missed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam didn''t want to go on the blind date that Tom had arranged for him. "What if she''s really ugly and I hate her?" he complained. "Then just clutch your chest and fake a heart attack," Tom replied. Sam thought this was a good idea, so he agreed to go through with it. He went to the address Tom had given him, and a beautiful woman answered the door. "Hi, I''m your blind date!" Sam said. The woman clutched her chest and fell to the ground.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Justin: If you give me a quarter, I''ll give you everything in my lunch box. Zach: That depends... what''s in your lunchbox? Justin: Nothing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She Was So Blonde She told someone to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and "Don''t Walk".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the hot dog say after winning a race? I''m a WIENER!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a teacher and a train? A teacher says "spit your gum out" and a train says "choo choo!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius say: Sperm sample from Nobel Prize winner is stroke of genius.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius Say: Crowd in elevator smell different to midget.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius say: Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways, going to Bangkok', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She used to have a broad mind and a narrow waist; now it''s the other way round. It was a very emotional wedding; even the cake was in tiers. Psychic wanted you know why, and where to apply. I don''t think they really wanted me in the marching band they gave me a piano. Then, when we played hide and seek, no-one came to look for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking around in the movies with my friends and we saw this one teenager. His pants were falling down, so I said to my friends, "God, these kids nowadays! I thought a rapper died and the kid decided to put his pants half-staff!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it. Once he was in the doctor''s office, the man followed instructions, undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he looked up the man''s ass was that eye staring right back at him. "You know," said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, impressed by a meat entree his wife had prepared, the husband asked, "What did you marinate this in?" The wife dropped her fork and went into a long explanation about how much she loved him and how life wouldn''t be the same without him. She must have seen the confused look on her husband''s face, because she inquired, "What did you ask me?" When he told her what he''d asked, the wife laughed and said, "I thought you asked me if I would marry you again!" Later, as she was cleaning up the kitchen, the husband called out, "Hey, Hon, WOULD you marry me again?" Without hesitation she replied, "Vinegar and barbecue sauce."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The veterinarian told the blonde that her dog needed some exercise. "You need to make sure this dog runs around," the doctor said. "Try playing a game of fetch with him." "I can''t play fetch with my dog," the blonde said. "Why not?" the doctor asked. "Because," she replied, "he can''t throw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Holiday Banana Bread: Ingredients: 2 laughing eyes, 2 loving arms, 2 well shaped legs, 2 firm milk containers, 1 fur-lined mixing bowl, 1 large banana Instructions: 1 - look into laughing eyes and hold loving arms. 2 - Spread well shaped legs slowly. 3 - Squeeze & massage milk containers until the fur-lined mixing bowl is well greased - check with middle finger. 4 - Add banana, work up and down until well creamed. 5 - Lower nuts and sigh with relief. When banana is soft, bread is done! 6 - Be sure to wash mixing utensils, but "do not lick the bowl." NOTE: If bread rises, leave town.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was filling out an application form. She quickly filled in the columns for Name; Age; Address et c. When she came to the column Salary Expected, she put "Yes." At an air show, the blonde turned to her partner and said, "I wouldn''t like to be up there in one of those!" Her partner replied, "I wouldn''t like to be up there without one." A blond farmer had a donkey had refused to go under a bridge, and when she measured the donkey and the bridge, found that the donkey was 6 inches too tall to go under. She got a hammer and chisel, and was cutting two grooves for the donkey''s ears when a passer-by suggested she dig a groove in the ground for the donkey''s feet. "Don''t be so daft," she said, "it''s his ears that''s too long, not his legs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Godzilla, King Kong, and a smart blonde are all on the Empire State Building. Who jumps first? None. Because none of them exist!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38 revolver. He placed it on top of the instrument panel, and then asked the navigator, "Do you know what I use this for?" The navigator replied timidly, "No, what''s it for?" The pilot responded, "I use this on navigators who get me lost!" The navigator proceeded to pull out a .45 and place it on his chart table. The pilot asked, "What''s that for?" "To be honest sir," the navigator replied, "I''ll know we''re lost before you will."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a college professor who didn''t buy into the whole "there''s no such thing as a stupid question" philosophy. Every year when he had a new class he instructed the students to ask him as many stupid questions as they could think of on the first day. That way, he figured, there''d be a minimized amount of stupidity for the duration of the term. The professor thought he''d heard every stupid question there was and didn''t laugh no matter what his students asked him, not even a smirk. Then, finally, a student asked something that he''d never heard before. The question made him laugh so hard he couldn''t stand up. A lanky, tomboyish girl raised her hand with a wry smile on her face, stood up and asked, "What is a question?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two criminals are talking in a jail cell. "What are you in for?" "Something I did NOT do!" "Sooo... you''re innocent? What did you not do?" "I DIDN''T run fast enough!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blond adventurers were on holiday, and went to see Niagara Falls. After a few drinks one night, one bet the other $500 he couldn''t carry him across the falls on a tightrope. After a very scary trip, his friend managed to stagger safely across, and the wager was duly paid. "That was close," said the loser. "When you wobbled, halfway across, I was sure I''d won."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this lady who was in the shower and her little boy walked in on her taking a shower & he saw her pubic hairs and says: "Mommy what''s that?" as he pointed down to her. "Well, that''s Mommy''s washcloth." The next day he walked in on her again, and asked her again. She says it was her washcloth. Well, this time when he walked out she shaved it off because she got tired of him asking. So the next day when he walked in on her, he asks: "Mommy what happened to your washcloth?" "Uh, Mommy lost it." So the little boy walked out. The next day he walked in on his mom and says: "Hey Mommy, the maid found your washcloth. She is washing Daddy''s face with it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the whale say to the dolphin when he pushed him? I didn''t do it on porpoise!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men were at a business convention where they were discussing cars. One man said, "I am an astronaut, so I drive a Saturn." Another man says, "I am a pimp, so I drive a cheap Escort." The last man speaks up saying, "Well, I beat both of you - I am a proctologist, so I drive a brown Probe!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid, when they said "Drinks are on the house!" She went and got a ladder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that small things orbit her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three blondes stranded on an island. They were left with one bottle of water, so the decided to have thirds of the bottle. The next day, the bottle is lying empty next to one blonde, and the other two blondes say, "Why''d you drink all the water?" and the blonde says, "But my third was at the bottom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She make Olympic sumo wrestlers look anorexic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid, she watches television on an Etch-A-Sketch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A biologist, a physicist and a mathematician were sitting in a street caf watching the crowd. Across the street, they saw a man and a woman entering a building. Ten minutes later, they reappeared, with a third person. "They have multiplied," said the biologist. "Oh no, it''s an error in measurement," the physicist replied. "If exactly one person enters the building now, it will be empty again," was the mathematician''s conclusion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a redneck with a beautiful woman on his arm? "Hey, nice tattoo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently, Germans conducted some scientific exploration involving their best men. Core drilling samples were taken to a depth of 50 metres, and during these examinations, small pieces of copper were discovered. After running many arduous tests on these samples, the German government announced that 25,000 years ago, ancient Germans had a nationwide telephone network. The British government was unimpressed, and conducted their own survey. From samples drilled to a depth of 100 meters, they found small pieces of glass, and announced that 35,000 years ago, the ancient Britons had a nationwide optical-fibre network. The Irish government felt they had to conduct their own survey, their scientists bored to a depth of 200 meters, but found absolutely nothing. They concluded that, 55,000 years ago, the ancient Irish already had a thriving cell phone network in place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There I was, in my car, driving down the road, when my boss rang up and said, "We''re making you Chief Area Salesman," and I swerved. Ten minutes later, he called again, "You''re now Deputy Area Manager," and I swerved again. Another twenty minutes go by, and another phone call, "You''re now Vice Chairman," and I swerved right off the road into a ditch. When the police asked what had happened, I said, "I just careered off the road."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man accused of robbing a bank was tried for the final time and was found guilty. Just before he was taken away, the man looked the judge in the eye and said, "Would it be okay if I called you a son of a bitch?" The judge''s face went red and he roared, "It most certainly would not! I''d add another two years onto your sentence!" The defendant nodded and then asked, "Would it be okay if I THOUGHT you were a son of a bitch?" The judge was becoming very annoyed but replied, "Yes, I suppose that would be okay. I obviously have no control over your thoughts." The defendant smiled and said, "Well, in that case, judge, I think you are a son of a bitch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Report of a duel between Alexander Shott and John Nott, in June 1849. Nott was shot and Shott was not. In this case, it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some said that Nott was not shot, but Shott says that he shot Nott. It may be that the shot Shott shot, shot Nott, or it may be possible that the shot Shott shot, shot Shott himself. We think, however, that the shot Shott shot, shot not Shott, but Nott.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A six-year-old boy came home from playing at his friend''s house and told his mother that he had broken a lamp when he threw a football. "It''s all right, mum," he said, brightly; "you don''t have to buy them another! Charlie''s mum said it was irreplaceable!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The gangster''s last words "Who put that violin in my violin case?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I gave up Thai boxing because I felt the Thais were getting fed up being put in boxes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you give the person who has everything? A box to keep it all in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Wake up and stumble in the room 40 minutes late. 2. Blame all of the problems in America on 9/11 and Iraq. 3. Pronounce "nuclear" right. 4. Publish my dog''s sequel. 5. Show off my awesome golf shot. Hey, I counted to five!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so cross-eyed, when I was banging her she thought she was getting a threesome!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between MJ and a grocery bag? One is white, made of plastic, dangerous for children to play with, and the other one holds groceries! Why does MJ like Wal-Mart? Because they have boys'' pants half off! What time is bedtime in Neverland? When the big hand touches the little hand! And now, for the grand finale: What is brown and in little boys'' pants? MJ''s hand!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('99.9% of all lawyers make the other ones look bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of white people running down a hill? Avalanche! What do you call a group of black people running down a hill? Mudslide! What do you call a group of Latinos running down a hiil? JAILBREAK! How do you find the country of Mexico? Roll a quarter down a hill. How do you find the richest Mexican? Find the one who got the quarter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, I saw my friend with a big puffy red nose. I asked her what happened and she said, "I stopped to smell a brose," then I said, "wait, there''s no b in rose!" She said, "Well, there was in that one!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that 61.8 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many old geezers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Back in my day, we didn''t have lightbulbs. We put candles in tin cans and hung them from the ceiling with thread. And we had to walk uphill both ways to school in a blizzard with nothing but a potato to keep us warm. And... zzzzzz......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Hey, that''s not funny! We''re suing! Q: How many Japanese does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Who needs lightbulbs with our technology? Q: How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: We can''t afford lightbulbs. The only thing I can afford is this old gym sock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Oh, that looked like it hurt! It must have knocked his nose off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abortion - Near Life Experience Bald - Follically liberated Blind - Photonically non-receptive Bum - Displaced homeowner Cannibalism - Intra-Species dining Censorship - Selective speech Cheating (Marriage) - Post-Marital Affairs Cheating (School) - Academic Dishonesty Clumsy - Uniquely coordinated Corpse - Permanently static post-human mass Cowboys - Bovine control officers Crime Rate - Street activity index Dead - Living impaired Deaf - Visually oriented Delicatessen - Corpse Farm Dish Washer - Utensil Sanitizer Fat - Person of substance Gas Station Attendant - Petroleum Transfer Technician Hunter - Meat Mercenary Idiot - Factually Unencumbered Insane Person - Selectively Perceptive Midget - Vertically Challenged', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Americans and the Russians had a car race, in which the car from America won. However, the report in the newspapers of Russia, read as follows "In a recent motor race, the Russian car finished in second place, while the American car finished next to last." (There were only two cars involved!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jerry Jones applied to a debt-collecting agency for a job, even though he had no experience. He was very intense, so the manager gave him a tough account with the promise that if he collected, he''d get the job. Two hours later, Jerry returned with the full amount! "Amazing!" said the manager. "How on earth did you manage that?" "Easy," replied Jerry, "I told him that if he didn''t pay up, I''d tell all his other creditors he''d paid us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On June 10th, 2006, San Fransisco, California held the largest gay, nude bike ride in the United States. I''m never buying a used bike ever again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad has always told me that putting in a little effort and dedication on the job never hurt anyone. Then again, he never heard of worker''s comp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Miss Blue(Teacher):"2 x 2 = 4, 4 x 4 = 16, and now, Brian, what is 16 x 16?" Brian(Pupil): "You cheated, Miss Blue. You always take the easy one and give us the hardest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: "My hair keeps falling out. What can you give me to keep it in?" Doctor: "A shoebox!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a reindeer fast? Don''t feed it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? "It''s Christmas, Eve!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ll be sober tomorrow, but you''ll be ugly for the rest of your life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s mother took him to a supermarket to buy some food. "Anything you break comes out of your allowance money!" shouted Johnny''s mother. Johnny turned around and said "But you don''t give me any allowance money!" "Yes, and now you know why."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there was a blonde, brunette, and a red-head. (How often do ya hear that? A lot!) The brunette said, "Wanna go out for a bite?" "Sure," said the blonde. A guy walked down the street and the blonde said, "I call him!" The blonde went and got him to bite her. "Why did ya do that," asked the brunette? "I got a BITE."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When all the national leaders met with Bush... Germans make your candy, said Germany''s leader, We abuse it, said Bush. Holland makes your remotes, said Holland''s leader We''d die without those, said Bush. Italy and Mexico bring in great food, said Mexico & Italy, We stuff ourselves with it, said Bush. Japan makes your video games, said Japan''s leader; Our kids and dads love it, said Bush. China makes all the rest, said China''s leader, Bush said, AMEN. WHAT DO YOU MAKE? said all but Bush, Bush took them to a farm, He took them to a sleping bull. The bull had a turd next to it. It said "Made in America", Bush told them America makes bull****', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen." 9. "This is just a 15 minute power nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to." 8. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out. You probably got here just in time!" 7. "I wasn''t sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm." 6. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance." 5. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?" 4. "Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem." 3. "The coffee machine is broken." 2. "Someone must''ve put decaf in the wrong pot." 1. "...in Jesus'' name. Amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hi, this is Johan advising you that you spend WAY too much time on the phone. GO OUTSIDE... See the world, LIVE a little... Have fun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so greasy Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid! Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco! Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so skinny Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio Yo mama so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex. Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and disappeared.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so lazy, she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs. Yo momma so lazy, she''s got a remote control just to operate her remote! Yo momma so lazy, she came in last place in a recent snail marathon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s head so small, she use a tea-bag as a pillow. Yo momma''s head so small, she got her ear pierced and died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so poor Yo mama so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said "Moving." Yo mama so poor she can''t afford to pay attention! Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush! Yo mama so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people''s fingers! Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!" Yo mama so poor she went to McDonald''s and put a milkshake on layaway. Yo mama so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk. Yo mama so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp. Yo mama so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin''?" She said, "Buying luggage." Yo mama so poor she drives a peanut. Yo mama so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so tall she tripped over a rock and hit her head on the moon. Yo mama so tall she tripped in Michigan and hit her head in Florida.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so bald Yo mamma so bald even a wig wouldn''t help! Yo mamma so bald you can see what''s on her mind Yo mamma so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the mama broom say to the little broom? Go to sweep little one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the teacher and the one who minds trains? The teacher trains minds, the other minds trains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with T, ends with the T and has full of T''s? [You must answer it and write it in the comment box!(hehe)]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a classroom, the teacher tell the pupils that peanuts make your smarter. Then a pupil said: "Are you nuts?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three mischievous boys went to the zoo one day for an outing, since they had been at school all week. They decided to visit the elephant cage, but soon enough, they were picked up by a cop for causing a commotion. The officer hauled them off to security for questioning. The supervisor in charge asked them to give their names and tell what they were doing at the elephant cage. The first boy innocently said, "My name is Gary, and I was just throwing peanuts into the elephant cage." The second added, "My name is Larry, and all I was doing was throwing peanuts into the elephant cage." The third boy was a little shaken up and said, "Well, my name is Peter, but my friends call me Peanuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I think I''m stupid... until I met George W. Bush. Now I feel like the smartest man in the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s late at night, the weather''s terrible, with lashing rain and high winds, when the traveller decides he''s had enough and pulls in to the hotel car park. He grabs a few essentials and makes a dash for the foyer. "Can you let me have a room for the night, please?" he enquires. "Very sorry, sir, we''ve no spare rooms at all," responds the helpful clerk. "You''ve no room at all? I find that hard to believe. I think that if George Dubya arrived now, you''d find a room for him!" "Well, I think we might find something for *him*." "Well, he''s not coming, so I''ll have the room!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jerry, a college freshman, was sitting in his English class. His teacher noticed that he wasn''t paying attention, so asked to see him after class. Jerry went up to the teacher''s desk, and waited while the teacher was talking to a attractive freshman girl. When he was done, he said, "Jerry, why weren''t you paying attention in my class?" "I was staring at the hot babe you were just talking to," Jerry said. "But don''t get any ideas," Jerry said, "you''re way to old for her." "Oh, really?" the teacher said. "Yeah, you''re old enough to be her father!" said Jerry. "This talk is over!" said the teacher. Jerry starts to walk out when the teacher says, "And by the way, Jerry, next class don''t stare at my daughter!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I read right the way through a medical dictionary, and found that the only thing in it I DON''T have is hypochondria!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde named Sharon was sitting at her till at the supermarket. Suddenly, she had an idea that would change the world forever. She had invented mind-mail! She called over her boss and told him. He was astonished and said, "Go on then, send me a mail through your mind!" She did as she was told, and sent him one. The manager then said, "I didn''t quite get that, what was the message?" She replied, "I dunno, work it out for yourself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Submit a joke = I''m a but jokes That''s so stupid = Sadist puts hot .................................. Bonus jokes with my fur = Joy! Swift knob humerus let''s hear a joke = Jerk tease halo (If you guys want that I anagram a sentence you like then post it on the comment box. But only from 7 letters to 30 letters!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Julia, how can you say Asshole in a nicer way? Julia: As holes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if a 500-pound man is a millionaire? (That''s 500-pound fat, not muscle.) Because he will have a totally hot, blonde, babe on his arm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that when she got into an elevator, she exceeded the weight limit. I wonder how many it took to get her in there in the first place?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They misunderestimate me. -Nov. 6, 2000 "Rarely is the question asked: Is out children learning?" -Jan. 11, 2000 "I aim to be a competitive nation." -April 21, 2006', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Drink apple juice, because O.J. will kill you. (O.J. = Orange Juice)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s There? Well Water Well Water Who? Well Water You Waiting For? Open The Door And Let Me IN!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Biddle was walking down the street one day carrying a small box with holes punched in the top. "What''s in that box?" Mrs. Riddle asked. "A cat," Mrs. Biddle answered. "What for?" "I''ve been dreaming about mice at night, and I''m scared of mice. The cat is to catch them." "But the mice you dream about are imaginary," said Mrs. Riddle. Mrs. Biddle turned to her friend and whispered, "So is the cat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton noticed that she was unusually hungry, having stomache pains, and hasn''t had her period for 2 months. She decides to go a doctor to get checked out. The doctor returns with the diagnosis that she is indeed pregnant. As you can imagine, the first thing she did was call her husband, Bill Clinton. "Honey, I have some news for you. You got me PREGNANT." After a few minutes, Bill''s voice comes back on the line. "Don''t panic. I will sort this out, but first I need to know who you are." *This is not true*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man was walking down the road and saw the priest also walking. Since he knows the priest usually rides a bike he asks where it is. "Well, I woke up this morning and couldn''t find it," he replies. "Oh. Well, here is an idea. When you go over the Ten Commandments in your sermon this morning, bear down real hard on Thou shall not steal. Then, whoever took it will feel guilty and give it back." "Great idea!" Well, that afternoon the man sees the priest riding his bike. "I see they gave it back to you. I knew my idea would work!" he says. "Well, actually I went through the Ten Commandments like you said, but when I got to Thou shall not commit adultery, I remembered where I left my bike!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette jump off of the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Who lands first? \ / \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ The brunette. The blonde has to stop and ask for directions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so hairy... ...you almost died of rugburn at birth! ...she looks like she got Buchwheat in a headlock. ...bigfoot is taking her picture! ...she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so nasty... ...she made speed stick slow down. ...she brings crabs to the beach. ...she made right guard turn left. ...the fishery payed her to leave. ...she has to creep up on bathwater. ...that she pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh. ...I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so old Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and she died. Yo mama so old her social security number is 1! Yo mama so old that when she was in school there was no history class. Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook. Yo mama so old her birth certificate says expired on it. Yo mama so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince. Yo mama so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper. Yo mama so old she ran track with dinosaurs. Yo mama so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s head so large she has to step into her shirts. Yo mama head is so big it shows up on radar. Yo mama''s house is so dirty roaches ride around on dune buggies! Yo mama house so dirty she has to wipe her feet before she goes outside. Yo mama''s teeth are so yellow traffic slows down when she smiles! Yo mama teeth are so yellow she spits butter. Yo mama''s glasses so thick that when she looks on a map she can see people waving. Yo mama''s glasses are so thick she can see into the future. Yo mama''s house is so small that when she orders a large pizza she has to go outside to eat it. Yo mama''s house so small you have to go outside to change your mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man 1: "I was on the television last night." Man 2: "Were you really?" Man 1: "Yeah. When I''m drunk I''ll sleep anywhere."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Manny was almost 29 years old. Most of his friends had already gotten married, and Manny just bounced from one relationship to the next. Finally a friend asked him, "What''s the matter, are you looking for the perfect woman? Are you THAT particular? Can''t you find anyone who suits you?" "No," Manny replied. "I meet a lot of nice girls, but as soon as I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn''t like them. So I keep on looking!" "Listen," his friend suggested, "Why don''t you find a girl who''s just like your dear ole mother?" Many weeks past before Manny and his friend got together again. "So, Manny, did you find the perfect girl yet? One that''s just like your mother?" Manny shrugged his shoulders, "Yes I found one just like Mom. My mother loved her; they became great friends." "Excellent!!! So.... are you and this girl engaged yet?" "I''m afraid not. My father can''t stand her!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Excuse me, is this tuna dolphin-friendly? "Dolphin-friendly? He was only best man at Flipper''s wedding!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her friends at a military camp had been taken out to play a game of paintball. Her team all bundle into their trench and prepare for the game. Suddenly, the whistle blows to signal the start of the game and the group-leader shouts, "Fire at will!" As the rest of the blonde''s group start firing she turns to the group-leader and asks, "Which one''s Will?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas, but there are more Catholic churches than casinos there. Not surprisingly, some worshippers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed. Since they get chips from many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to sort the offerings. The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Fransiscan monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in. This is done by the chip monks. You didn''t even see it coming, did you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Which sea animal is very grumpy? A: The crab!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the middle ages, the monks were only allowed to talk once every year to the priest. They were only allowed two words to say. One year, when a new monk came, the priest told him of this and the monk agreed. After the first year, the monk said in a sad voice, "Bed hard." The priest frowned at him and ushered him away. The next year the poor monk said in a sad voice, "Food cold." The priest scowled at him and told him to go away back to work. The next year the monk said in a sad voice, "Quit job." The priest suddenly shouted, "Finally! You''ve been here three years and all you''ve done is complain!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue?.. and then you add eggs and sugar... and you get cake? Where did the glue go ? NEED AN ANSWER? You know darned well where it went! That''s what makes the cake Stick to your BUTT Now that you''ve smiled at least once, it''s your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle). We all need a good laugh - keep on smilin''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? I don''t know To get the Chinese newspaper Get it? No Neither do I. I get USA Today', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A taxi driver, driving a Mercedes-Benz, picked up a rather simple looking fellow at the airport one day. When the gentleman got in and they started on their way he enquired what the three pinned emblem on the front was for. The driver replied, "Why, it''s for lining it up at people so you can run them down." "Ah, I see," said the man. With this the taxi driver starts heading straight for an elderly woman but at the last second swerves away. He hears a loud bang, he looks curiously over at the passenger who is hanging out of the car with the door wide open: "I thought you were going to miss there for a minute!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy-Bob returns from school and tells his father he got an "F" in Arithmetic today. "Why?" asks his father. "The teacher asked, ''How much is 2 x 3?'' I said, ''6''". "But that''s right," said his father. "Then she asked me ''How much is 3 x 2?''." "What''s the fucking difference?" asks his father. "That''s what I said!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very mean, nasty, unattractive woman enters the Wal-Mart store with her two kids. The Wal-Mart greeter says hello to the kids and then hello to the lady who just grunts at the greeter in return. The greeter asks the lady, "Great kids! Are they twins?" "No," replies the lady, "one is 9 the other is 7. Do they look like twins?" "No," the greeter says, "I just couldn''t believe you could get laid twice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three Indian women are sitting side by side. The first, sitting on a goatskin, has a son who weighs 170 pounds. The second, sitting on a deerskin, has a son who weighs 130 pounds. The third, seated on a hippopotamus hide, weighs 300 pounds. What famous theorem does this illustrate? The squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws on the other two hides!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A: 101, one to hold the lightbulb and 100 to spin the house!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out. Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred. Marriage is the sole cause of divorce. Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity. Marriage still confers one very special privilege - only a married person can get divorced. Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and around the hands and feet of the man. Marriage: the only sport in which the trapped animal has to buy the license. Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In an American history discussion group, the professor was trying to explain how society''s ideal of beauty changes with time. "For example," he said, "take the 1921 Miss America. She stood five feet, one inch tall, weighed 108 pounds and had measurements of 30-25-32. How do you think she''d do in today''s version of the contest?" The class fell silent for a moment. Then one student piped up, "Not very well." "Why is that?" asked the professor. "For one thing," the student pointed out, "She''d be way too old!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s life is such a failure, when I gave her a dollar she said her life was complete.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a chain mail I recieved. Hi there, Thought For The Day "Good looks catch the eye but a GOOD personality catches the heart. You''re blessed with both!" Don''t be flattered, this message was sent to ME! I just wanted YOU to read it. PASS IT ON.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman just got a new job and her co-workers told her her first assignment: to fire the janitor, Don. The woman was very nervous about doing this, so she decided to get it over with fast. She marched up with her head down and said to the man, "I''m sorry, but you''re fired!" Her co-workers who were watching suddenly started laughing out loud. She looked at the man she fired and he said, "I don''t think you have the right to fire you boss!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The three stages of sex in marriage: Tri-weekly, Try-weekly, Try-weakly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How was your blind date? a college student asked her room-mate. "Terrible!" the room-mate answered. "He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce." "Wow! That''s a very expensive car. What''s so bad about that?" "He was the original owner!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It seems that an elephant got too close to all the baby ducks the circus had brought in for Easter and accidentally inhaled a bunch of them. The poor elephant was choking on them and no one could help. Finally the trainer goosed him -- and the elephant blew out a whole trunkful of downy feathers. That''s what he gets for snorting quack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A women''s lib speaker was addressing a large group and said, "Where would man be today if it were not for woman?" She paused a moment and looked around the room. "I repeat, where would man be today if it were not for woman?" From the back of the room came a voice, "He''d be in the Garden of Eden eating strawberries."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The boss returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up. Everybody, except one girl, laughed uproariously. "What''s the matter?" grumbled the boss. "Haven''t you got a sense of humor?" "I don''t have to laugh," she replied. "I''m leaving Friday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was 50 Cent''s daughter named? Penny!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re screwed when you fall in love with a woman you see at the mall, then realize that she is your sister.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many presidents does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They''ll only promise change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None ''o yo'' fuckin'' business!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. and Mrs. Wong are a married couple who live in China. After being married for three years, they decided to have a baby. They ended up having a baby girl with mental disabilities. They named her ''Somting Wong''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adult Male', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper. MYTH: A female moth. MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better. RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn. SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time. SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off. TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction. TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today. YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed. WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Father Sullivan was ministering to a man on his deathbed. "Renounce Satan!" yelled Father Sullivan. "No," said the dying man. "I say, renounce the devil and his works!" "No," the man repeats. "And why, in the name of all that is holy, not?" asks Father Sullivan. "Because," said the dying man, "I want to wait until I see where I''m heading before I start annoying anybody."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('US tourists, a man and his wife are traveling in the Middle East. An Arab approaches the husband, saying, "I''ll give you 100 camels for your woman." After a long silence, the husband says, "She''s not for sale." The indignant wife says, "What took you so long to answer?" The husband replied, "I was trying to figure out how to get 100 camels back home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m only here in spirit at the moment, but if you''ll leave your name and number, I will get back to you as soon as I''m here in person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun who worked for a local home health care agency was out making her rounds when she ran out of gas. As luck would have it, there was a station just down the street. She walked to the station to borrow a can with enough gas to start the car and drive to the station for a fill up. The attendant regretfully told her that the only gas can he owned had just been loaned out, but if she would care to wait he was sure it would be back shortly. Since the nun was on the way to see a patient she decided not to wait and walked back to her car. After looking through her car for something to carry to the station to fill with gas, she spotted a bedpan she was taking to the patient. Always resourceful, she carried it to the station, filled it with gasoline, and carried it back to her car. As she was pouring the gas into the tank of her car, two men walked by. One of them turned to the other and said: "Now that is what I call faith!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men walked into a bar. They died', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anyways, there was an assembly at school and they had us sit on bleachers inside the main gym. Then I notice one of my friends walk in and since there''s a space next to me, I decide to call him over. But the thing is, his nickname is fire, because of his bright red hair. So I yell out FIRE! loud enough for him to hear me over the noise. Then I realize what I just did... everyone in my section of the bleachers just stared at me until a teacher came and pulled me off to the side for a little talk. This has been a Stupid Drunky Moment. (By the way, if you think I''m stupid, think about the other students. If someone yells fire, you run, you don''t turn around and stare at him. Idiots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A daddy was listening to his child say his prayer "Dear Harold." At this, dad interrupted and said, "Wait a minute, why did you call God ''Harold''?" The little boy looked up and said, "That''s what they call Him in church. You know the prayer we say, "Our Father, who art in Heaven, Harold be Thy name..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rate this joke 4 smiles and g I''ll give you $5 Stop here and rate now Read the rest after you vote You don''t need to read the comments now Vote Now NOW NOW!!!! NOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOW DID YOU VOTE 4? PLEASE PZ puL eASE pull with ease Now vote Alright, you voted Good job Read on Keep scrolling All the way When you''re all the way down, please comment I''ll give you another $5 Vote 4 get $5 Commment get $5 Both get $10 Both get $20 dollars $50 each $200 together Ya done? One more thing PSYCH hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahah', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the last teacher quit, a new teacher was hired. On her first day of work, she saw "AAFTWC" on the board. "What is the meaning of this?" the new teacher asked. A white kid stood up and replied, "An apple from the white children." On her second day, the teacher walked in, and saw "AOFTBC" on the board. She asked who wrote it and what it meant. A black kid stood up and said, "An orange from the black children. On the third day, the teacher almost fainted when she saw "F***1T" written on the board. "THAT''S IT! WHO WROTE THIS, AND WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!?" A Mexican stood up and told her, "From us chicano kids, 1 tamale."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ere is a chasm of carbon and silicon the software can''t bridge. Yesterday it worked Today it is not working Windows is like that To have no errors Would be life without meaning No struggle, no joy You step in the stream, but the water has moved on. This page is not here. No keyboard present Hit F1 to continue Zen engineering? Hal, open the file Hal, open the damn file, Hal Open the file, please Hal Out of memory. We wish to hold the whole sky, But we never will. Having been erased, The document you''re seeking Must now be retyped. The ten thousand things How long do any persist? Netscape, too, has gone. Rather than a beep Or a rude error message, These words: "File not found." Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared Screen. Mind. Both are blank.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s There. OMG OMG who? OMG! How long has that cookie been in your Lunch Box?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s feet smell so bad that her shoes committed suicide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arachnoleptic Fit (n.) The frantic dance performed just after you''ve accidentally walked through a spider web. Beelzebug (n.) Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at 3 in the morning and cannot be cast out. Bozone (n.) The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. Cashtration (n.) The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of key can''t open a door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of key can''t open a door. A monkey', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('newf is cool timmy cool is cool battery is cool girliepie is cool newf is cool drunky is cool all on my buddy list are cool all on wocka are cool all on braingle are cool all on earth are cool all in the many universes are cool I just said you''re cool vote full funny to agree you''re cool schatzy228 is an @$$hole', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Swiss man, looking for directions, pulls up at a bus stop where two Englishmen were waiting. "Entschuldigung, sprechen Sie Deutsches?" he asks. The Englishmen just stare at him. "M''excusez-vous, parlez-vous franais ?" They continue to stare. "Lo scusate, parlate italiano?" No response. "Me excusa, usted habla espaol?" Still nothing. The Swiss man drives off in disgust. One Englishman says to the other, "Y''know, maybe we ought to learn a foreign language." "Why?" says the other. "That feller knew 4 languages, and it didn''t do him any good!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three contractors are at a theme park to bid for a job repairing fences one is from New York, one from Texas and the third from Florida. First to bid is the Florida contractor. He measures up and says, "Well, I reckon we''ll do the job for $900. That''s $400 for materials, $400 for the men, and $100 for me." Next is the Texan, who measures up and says, "I''ll do the job for $700, that''s $300 for materials, $300 for my men, and $100 for me." The man from New York doesn''t even stand up. He says, "$2700." The park owner, incredulous, says, "You didn''t even measure the job! How did you arrive at that price?" "Easy," says the New Yorker. "$1000 for you, $1000 for me, and we hire the Texan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The blonde arrived at work, looking very bleary-eyed and tired. "What''s wrong with you?" asked her friend. "I was up half the night," came the reply. "And why was that?" "I was waiting for the cat to come home, so I could put her out for the night."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, a Frenchman and Angelina Jolie are sitting together in a train travelling through Switzerland when the train enters a tunnel, and everything goes dark. There''s a kissing noise, and then the sound of a slap. When the train comes out of the tunnel, Angelina Jolie and the Englishman are sitting there as if nothing has happened, and the Frenchman is holding a slapped face. The Frenchman is thinking, "That Englishman must have kissed Angelina and she swung at him, missed, and slapped me." Angelina Jolie is thinking, "That French guy must have tried to kiss me, kissed the Englishman by mistake, and got slapped." The Englishman is thinking, "This is great. When we go through the next tunnel, I''ll kiss the back of my hand again, and slap that French guy again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Faunacated (adj.) How wildlife ends up when its environment is destroyed. Hence Faunacatering (v.), which has made a meal of many species. Grantartica (n.) The cold, isolated place where art companies dwell without funding. Hemaglobe (n.) The bloody state of the world. Kinstirpation (n.) A painful inability to move relatives who come to visit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember when ram meant just a male sheep And bugs and worms were just things that creep? When a gopher and a mouse were li''l critters And virus were microbes that gave one the shivers? When a web was a sticky net that housed a spider And nets were just strings all woven together? When surfing was just riding an ocean wave And a slip was dodging trouble with a close shave? When a mime was a painted-face animated mute clown And hackers were people who slashed things down? When menus and servers were all about eating And addresses and homes were places for living? When Archie and Veronica were actually people And trolls were pests that were considered mythical? When mud was just slime and Spam was just food And to ''finger'' someone was not considered good? When to chat and to talk still needed a voice...? Now being online has all but mooted that choice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A normally sweet Great Dane, Psil, has one quirk: she hates United Parcel Service drivers. While walking Psil one day, around the corner of a house came a UPS man. Struggling to keep hold of Psil, the owner, trying to ease the situation, said, "As you can see, he just loves UPS men." "Don''t you feed him anything else?" he responded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the three questions most commonly asked by lawyers? 1. How much money do you have? 2. Where can you get more? 3. Do you have anything you can sell?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In most offices, the photocopier is out of order every now and then. One copy repairman had answered question after question for the employees. Finally one day, he just smiled and handed them this sheet. The copier is out of order! Yes, we have called the service man. Yes, he will be in today. No, we cannot fix it. No, we do not know how long it will take. No, we do not know what caused it. No, we do not know who broke it. Yes, we are keeping it. No, we do not know what you are going to do now. Thank You', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she fell off a donkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('make a hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat, when she walked past the TV, I missed a whole episode off MTV''s grand finale of Making the Van!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girliepie has one that is really embarrassing! I tell it from her point of view - It was the next to last day of school and I was walking in the hall with my friends. I saw my friend Jacob a few feet away from me, so I decided to say hi. We always play around, so I went up behind him and put my arm around him and said, "Hey sexy". He turned around and looked at me and it wasn''t him! It was some kid I''ve never seen before in my life! My face turned beet red!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she tried to hijack a plane she couldn''t fit through the door. Yo momma''s so stupid that when she tried to hijack a plane, she killed the driver, put it on auto pilot, and let it fly her straight into an army camp. The soldiers on the plane were laughing their testicles off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so fat that when she goes to the beach she''s the only one that gets a tan!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honk if you''ve never seen an Uzi fired from a car window. If you can read this, my wife fell off! (Seen on the back of a biker''s vest.) If you can beat me, you can eat me! (Seen on a Corvette driven by a "drop-dead gorgeous blonde.") Remember: Stop lights timed for 35mph are also timed for 70mph. GUYS: No shirt, no service. GALS: No shirt, no charge. I didn''t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian. Heart Attacks...God''s Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends We have enough youth, how about a fountain of smart? Boldly going nowhere. Cat: The other white meat. Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway He''s not dead, He''s electro-encephalographically challenged If you can''t dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets If you lived in your car, you''d be home by now WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so poor she has only got two channels on her T.V. : ''on'' and ''off''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Indian lined up all of his ten sons and stood in front of them. He then asked, "Who push port-a-potty over cliff?" Nobody answered him. He then asked again, "Who push port-a-potty over cliff?" And again nobody answered. The old Indian said, "I tell story of Georgie and Georgie father. Georgie chop down cherry tree. Georgie tell truth, Big Georgie no punish. Little Indian tell truth, I no punish." So the Indian asked again, "Who push port-a-potty over cliff?" The littlest Indian replied, "I push port-a-potty over cliff. " The old Indian then shakes him, spanks him, does everything he can to punish him. When he is done, the little Indian asks, "Georgie tell truth, Georgie no get punish. I tell truth, I get punished. Why you punish?" The old Indian replied, "Big Georgie not in cherry tree when it got chopped down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 4-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, soaking in the whole event. The man thought, "Great...he''s 4 and I''m gonna have to start explaining the birds and bees. No need to jump the gun - I''ll just let him ask, and I''ll answer." After everything was over, the man walked over to his son and said, "Well son, do you have any questions?" "Just one," gasped the still wide-eyed lad. "How fast was that calf going when he hit that cow?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence. Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain? A: After a dye job. Q: Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes? A: They''re doing research on black holes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do peroxide blondes and black men have in common? A: They both have black roots. Q: Why are there no dumb brunettes? A: Peroxide. Q: How do you tell if a bleach blonde did your landscaping? A: The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirate''s favourite branch of the military? The Arrrmy... no, the Navy, he''s a pirate!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it''s our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you''d like to have dinner with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hawt het hlle ma i redanig?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the squirrel sleep on his stomach? To keep his nuts warm!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the tie say to the hat? You go on a head, I''ll just hang around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Kanga. Kanga who? No! Kangaroo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Got to Get You Into My Sights I Put a Shell in You You''ve Shot a Friend Huntin'', Shootin'', Drinkin'' Dude Looked Like a Birdie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiter, I''d a cup of coffee, please, no cream. "I''m sorry, sir, we''re out of cream. Would you have it with no milk?" "Waiter, this coffee tastes like mud!" "Well, it was ground this morning!" "Tea or coffee, gentlemen?" asked the waiter. "I''ll have tea," replied the first customer. "Me too and be sure the cup is clean!" Soon, the waiter returns with two cups of tea. "Two teas," he says. "And which of you gentleman asked for a clean cup?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ran into an old buddy the other day. He was a rising entrepreneur, but now he looked down and out. What gives? He begins wailing his tale. "I had a restaurant out there on the interstate, you know. Spent a fortune on a new high-rise sign to attract traffic. It did, too. It read ''free cocktail with dinner!'' The ''cocktail'' was flashing red neon. Was it impressive!" "Sounds like a good idea. So what went wrong?" "Oh, the county took notice, inspection crews come out, I''m harassed all the time by the Planning department, the churches in the neighborhood have filed compaints-" "Hey, I thought you ran a stand-up operation out there." "I did. Half my flashing red neon burned out!" "Oh, I see..." I thought a minute. "Which half?" "Don''t make no difference!" he wailed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Late one night at the insane asylum one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!" Another one said, "How do you know?" The first inmate said, "God told me!" Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did NOT!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three members of a motorcycle gang walked in. The first walked up to the old man and pushed his cigarette into the old man''s pie, and then took a seat at the counter. The second walked up to the old man and spat into the old man''s milk, and then he took a seat at the counter. The third walked up to the old man and turned over the old man''s plate, and then he took a seat at the counter. Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the diner. Shortly thereafter, one of the bikers said to the waitress, "Humph, not much of a man, was he?" The waitress replied, "Not much of a truck driver either. He just backed his truck over three motorcycles."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the little girls put minnows in their pants? A: So they could smell like big girls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If we could shrink the earth''s population to a village of 100 people, with everything else remaining the same, it would look like this: There would be: * 57 Asians * 21 Europeans * 14 from the Western Hemisphere, * 8 Africans, * 52 would be female * 48 would be male * 70 would be non-white * 30 would be white * 70 would be non-Christian * 30 would be Christian * 95 would be heterosexual * 5 would be homosexual * 6 people would own 59% of the world''s wealth, and all 6 would be from the United States and male. * 80 would live in substandard housing * 70 would be unable to read * 50 would suffer from malnutrition * 1 would be near death * 1 would be near birth * 1 would have a college education * 1 would own a computer * 0 would play oboe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smart Boss + Smart Employee = Profit Smart Boss + Dumb Employee = Production Dumb Boss + Smart Employee = Promotion Dumb Boss + Dumb Employee = Overtime', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So this chicken walks into the library, and she walks up to the librarian and she says: "Book." The librarian says: "You want a book?" "Book." "Any book?" "Book." So the librarian gives the chicken a novel and off she goes. An hour later the chicken comes back and says, "Book-book" The librarian says: "Now you want two books?" "Book-book." So she gives the chicken two more novels. The chicken leaves but she comes back soon. "Book-book-book." "Three books?" "Book-book-book." So the librarian gives the chicken three books, but she decides she''ll follow the chicken and find out what''s going on. The chicken goes down the alley, and out of town and towards the woods, into the woods and down to the river, down to the swamp, and there is a bullfrog. The chicken sets the books down by him, and he looks at them and says: "Reddit...Reddit...Reddit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so poor, when I told her she eats dirt, she said to me,"No way, that stuff is for rich people!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser, with an experienced partner. A call came in, telling them to disperse some people who were loitering. The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner. The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let''s get off the corner, people." A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again, "Let''s get off that corner... NOW!" Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction. Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?" "Pretty good," chuckled the vet, "especially since this is a bus stop."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A duck, a skunk, and a frog go to the movies. Tickets cost one dollar. Which animal doesn''t get in? The skunk! The frog has a green back, the duck has a bill, but the skunk only has a scent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elephant was drinking out of a river one day, when he spotted a turtle asleep on a log. He ambled on over and kicked it clear across the river. "What did you do that for?" asked a passing giraffe. "Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 53 years ago." "Wow, what a memory!" commented the giraffe. "Yes," said the elephant, "turtle recall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so stupid, that when the power went out, she said, "Don''t worry, we''ll just watch a tape."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a redneck family reunion? A: An orgy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years. The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board looking over an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump. The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms. Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs. The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump. "Congratulations! You''re a free man. Just tell me why didn''t you jump?" asked the doctor. To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can''t swim!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A visitor to a certain college paused to admire the new Hemingway Hall that had been built on campus. "It''s a pleasure to see a building named for Ernest Hemingway," he said. "Actually," said his guide, "it''s named for Joshua Hemingway. No relation." The visitor was astonished. "Was Joshua Hemingway a writer, also?" "Yes, indeed," said his guide. "He wrote a check."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The French will eat almost anything. A young cook decided that the French would enjoy feasting on rabbits and decided to raise rabbits in Paris and sell them to the finer restaurants in the city. He searched all over Paris seeking a suitable place to raise his rabbits. None could be found. Finally, an old priest at the cathedral said he could have a small area behind the rectory for his rabbits. He successfully raised a number of them, and when he went about Paris selling them, a restaurant owner asked him where he got such fresh rabbits. The young man replied, "I raise them myself, near the cathedral. In fact, I have a hutch back of Notre Dame.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A scientist has come up with proof of something students have known for years -- chemistry lectures are boring. In an article published in the current issue of Chemistry in Britain, a university chemistry lecturer introduced a guest lecturer to a class of 50 doctoral candidates. Then, he and his colleagues studied variations in what he calls the HTFDR -- "head-to-floor distance reduction." After about an hour , the average HTFDR dropped from 135cm to 121cm, said the author of the study, who preferred to remain anonymous. The HTFDR immediately bounced back to normal when the speaker uttered the magic words: "And in conclusion..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy took his blonde girlfriend on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune. The first day they go fishing, but they don''t catch anything. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, the guy catches a fish. As they''re driving home, they''re really depressed. The guy turns to his girlfriend and says, "Do you realize that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred dollars?" The girlfriend says, "Wow! It''s a good thing we didnt catch any more!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do Roman paramedics refer to an IV as a four?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so big, that when she farts, she destroys the ozone layer above her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a messed up family, the child named Hope is goth, and the child named Faith is atheist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, when she went into a sumo wrestling match, they said, "Sorry, no professionals allowed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many women on their periods does it take to change a light bulb? - - - O N E ! ! , YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends, who haven''t met for a couple of years, are catching up with each other''s news. One says, "And then the doctor said he''d have me back on my feet in a fortnight!" His pal says, "Well, did he?" "He sure did, I had to sell my car to pay him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did your parents have any kids that lived?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday, All those backups seemed a waste of pay. Now my database has gone away. Oh I believe in yesterday. Suddenly, There''s not half the files there used to be, And there''s a milestone hanging over me The system crashed so suddenly. I pushed something wrong What it was I could not say. Now all my data''s gone and I long for yesterday-ay-ay-ay. Yesterday, The need for back-ups seemed so far away. I knew my data was all here to stay, Now I believe in yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck when your stair master has an ashtray!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly lady was well-known for her faith and for her boldness in talking about it. She would stand on her front porch and shout "PRAISE THE LORD!" Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, "There ain''t no Lord!!" Hard times set in on the elderly lady, and she prayed for God to send her some assistance. She stood on her porch and shouted "Praise the Lord! God, I need food!! I am having a hard time. Please, Lord, send me some groceries!!" The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted, "PRAISE THE LORD!" The neighbor jumped from behind a bush and said, "Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries; God didn''t." The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said, "Praise the Lord! He not only sent me groceries, but He made the devil pay for them. Praise the Lord!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are in a car travelling at a constant speed. On your left is a valley, and on your right is a fire engine travelling at the same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping pig which is the same size as your car, and you can''t overtake it. Behind you is a helicopter, flying at ground level; both are travelling at the same speed as you. What must you do to get out of this highly dangerous situation? Get off the merry-go-round!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam and Abe, in their late seventies, first met years ago in the second grade. Their relationship now is mostly playing cards, telling jokes and making bets. Sam calls Abe and says, "I got a bet for you: I bet you that mine is longer soft than yours is hard. A thousand dollars!" Abe says, "How can that be? If you knew anything about biology, you ..." Sam interrupts, "I called for a bet, not a lecture. Mine is longer soft than yours is hard, ...a thousand dollars, ...yes or no!!" Abe says, "Okay, okay, I''ll take your bet! How long is yours soft?" Sam says, "Eleven years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why has Edward Woodward got 4 d''s in his name? If he hadn''t he would be Ewar Woowar!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s red and invisible? No tomato.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking around and I saw somebody selling a shirt that said this: F.B.I. Female Body Inspector', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is entered later by a computer tech into their database. One theft report stated that a farmer had lost 2,025 pigs. Thinking that to be an error, the tech called the farmer directly. "Is it true Mr. (Smith) that you lost 2,025 pigs?" she asked. "Yeth," lisped the farmer. Being a Howard County girl herself, the tech entered: "Subject lost 2 sows and 25 pigs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary Clancy goes up to Father O''Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she''s in tears. He says, "So what''s bothering you, dear?" She says, "Oh, Father, I''ve got terrible news. My husband passed away last night." The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that''s terrible. Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?" She says, "That he did, Father..." The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?" She says, "He said, ''Please, Mary, put down that darned gun!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For a complete breakdown of how points are calculated, please read the Site Rules. You can get to the site rules by going to the FAQ''s and the first answer gives you a link to the Site Rules.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jokes are not immediately available to all users until they are voted by other users at least 10 times. This is to assure that the rating of the joke is accurate and that it does not violate the "Terms and Conditions" of this website. If you have your preferences set to not hide any jokes then you will be able to see jokes with fewer than 10 votes in the "Unrated Jokes" section.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('G: Jokes rated G are acceptable for everyone. No bad language and no violence or sexual references are in these jokes. PG: These jokes are suitable for most children. Mild violence or language may appear in these jokes. PG13: These jokes may contain some bad language or violence. Some mild sexual content may also appear in these jokes. R: These jokes contain foul language and sexual or violent content. You can go to "My Account"---"Edit Account" and filter out jokes you don''t want to see.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not to be confused with the Daily Joke Newsletter, a subscription to a joke means that it will appear on your "View Subscriptions" page. This allows you to keep up-to-date on the conversation/comments of your favorite jokes. To subscribe, click the checkbox at the bottom of the comment box on the joke page. You can always unsubscribe at any time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can report duplicates once you get 100 points. For every duplicate that you correctly report, you get 10 points. You can also help by verifying duplicates that other users have reported. For every verification, you get 1 point (regardless of whether you vote yes or no). If you vote for a duplicate that you reported you DO NOT get any points. If you report 2 duplicate jokes and 1 of them is yours, you DO NOT get any points.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An editor is someone who has earned enough points to "unlock" certain features of the website. Editors have certain degrees of ability to modify the jokes on this website. Here is a list of the requirements and privileges given to those who meet the requirements. You do not need to ask to become an editor. If you meet the requirements you automatically have those privileges.(Note: You may not get those privileges if you exhibit bad behavior toward the website.) Level 0: (100 Points) You can report and verify duplicate jokes. Level 1: (500 Points) You can suggest and verify corrections to jokes in order to improve spelling, grammar and other errors. Level 2: (1000 Points) Your votes on jokes count as double (but you still only get 1 point for a vote) Level 3: (4000 Points) Your votes on jokes count as triple (but you still only get 1 point for a vote)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On rare circumstances the behavior of a user of this site is deemed so inappropriate that they will not be allowed to become an editor even with the correct number of points or even if they were already an editor when they had the bad behavior. Bad behavior includes such things as registering multiple fake accounts, submitting jokes that are not jokes, or that are abusive to other users of the website, or submitting false duplicate reports or misusing the joke-correction functionality of this website.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please contact us. We are happy to answer questions, and we are always eager to make Wocka.com a better place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Registered users win points for submitting and voting on jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- OK, . . . . so what''s the speed of dark? - When everything is coming your way, you''re in the wrong lane. - Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. - Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don''t have film. - How much deeper would', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Save the whales. Collect the whole set. - A day without sunshine is like...night. - On the other hand, you have different fingers - 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. - 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. - Remember, hal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side! ************************************************************ Q: Why did the punk rock star cross the road? A: Because he was stapled to the chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Users to accumulate 5,000 points are rewarded with having no advertisements shown to them on this website. You can also get icons that appear next to your name once you have achieved certain goals. Awards are described on the icon page. You can get to the icon page by clicking an icon next to someone''s username.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thank you for using Wocka.com. This page states the terms and conditions under which you may use the web site. It is important that you read this page carefully because by opening our web site you agree to be bound, without limitation or qualification, by these terms. If you do not accept any of the terms stated here then do not use the web site. This web site may, in it''s sole discretion, modify or revise these terms at any time by updating this web page. You are bound by any such modification or revision and should therefore visit this page periodically to review the terms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very homely person made an appointment with a psychiatrist. The homely person walked into the doctor''s office and said, "Doctor, I''m so depressed and lonely. I don''t have any friends, no one will come near me, and everybody laughs at me. Can you help me accept my ugliness?" "I''m sure I can," the psychiatrist replied. "Just go over and lie face down on that couch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad: Son what is the difference a penis and a loaf of bread? Son: I don''t know. Dad: Then remind me to never send you to the store for a loaf of bread.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First, go to Wocka''s Joke Home Page. There you will see the Daily Joke of the Day. In that box, (in the bottom-right corner) there are 3 links. The bottom link says "Get Daily Jokes Via E-Mail"; that is what you click. Make sure we have your correct email address and press the button: Newsletter Your Email Address: Subscribe Unsubscribe Do It We hate spam just as much as you do. Your email address will never be shared or sold to anyone. Your information is kept private and is only used for sending the daily joke. You can unsubscribe at any time by following the link at the bottom of the daily email or by coming back to this page. If you are under the age of 13, please get your parents approval before submitting your email address. Please read our Privacy Policy for more information.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We are rated with RSAC i, SafeSurf TM Rated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your joke was submitted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was meeting his girlfriend''s parents for the first time for dinner. After dinner, his girlfriend and her mother left the room to do the dishes, leaving him with the father and the dog Duke, who was sitting underneath the boy''s chair. Unfortunately, it was a large dinner and he really had to fart. He stealthily let out a quiet, but audible, fart. "Duke!" the dad yelled. "This is great!" the boy thought. "He thinks the dog is farting!" So he let out another one. "Duke!" the father barked. The boy thought he was homefree so he let everything out at once in a really loud and smelly fart. "Duke! Get out of there before the boy sh*ts on you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend in need . . . . . .is a damn nuisance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Imagine you are stuck in a cell, no windows, no doors pretty much nothing. How do you get out? A: -Stop imagining!-', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every second one! I figure, no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three for each three they unlock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Maybe it''s true that life begins at 40. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out. There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory, the other two I forget. Middle age is when it takes longer to rest than to get tired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally got my boss to laugh, said one friend to another after work. "Oh, how?" "I asked for a raise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was a slow worker and found it difficult to hold down a job. After a visit to the employment office, he was offered work at the local zoo. When he arrived for his first day, the keeper, aware of his reputation, told him to take care of the tortoise section. Later, the keeper dropped by to see how the young man was doing and found him standing by an empty enclosure with the gate open. "Where are the tortoises?" he asked. "I can''t believe it," said the new employee, "I just opened the door and whooooosh, they were gone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Slow people always walk side by side, even if they don''t know each other. 2. They drive side by side, too. If they can''t find another slow driver to pair up with, they drive in the fast lane. 3. Slow walkers never look back. When they drive, they never look in their rear view mirrors, either. 4. Slow people drift sideways so they''ll block the path of anyone trying to pass them. If two people or vehicles are trying to get around them at the same time, they drift into the path of the one that is moving at the highest speed. 5. Follow behind a slow person in the grocery store and you''ll wind up with soggy ice cream every time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men, a Scotsman, a Frenchman, and an Englishman were given a sentence of life inprisonment for manslauter in Saudi Arabia. When they got to the trial the judge said, "It is my daughter''s birthday, so you will only be lashed 100 times." They went to the whipman and he said, "Today is my birthday, you may all have a wish" The Frenchman, who went firstm said, "I would like a pillow strapped to my back. "He got 33 painless lashes until the pillow broke. He then got hit 77 times on his back. The Scotsman asked for two pillows. He got 66 painless lashes until the pillows broke. Then got 34 whips on his back. The whipman said to the englishman, "England is a noble country, therefore you may have two wishes. The Englishman said,"Thank you, my first wish is to increase my number of whippings to the maximum 1000. My second wish is to have the frenchman strapped to my back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it weren''t for Venetian blinds, it would be curtains for everybody.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin Pi!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to learn how to make ice cream, so I started attending sundae school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My teacher always used to tell me that double negatives are a real no-no.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was a story told to us by our chemistry master at school. A female student wished to make some potassium hydroxide solution (aqueous) and decided to throw a large lump of potassium into a bucket of water. Her professor observed what she was about to do, out of the corner of his eye and hurried towards her, and after confirming this was what she was intending to do, asked her first to stir the water in the bucket for five minutes before adding the potassium. She was puzzled and ran after him to ask the purpose of this action. ''It will give me time to get away'' said the professor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Sherwood. Sherwood who? Sherwood like to meet you, so open the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the older lightbulb say to the younger lightbulb? A: You''re too young to go out tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a girl with a lisp. She couldn''t pronounce her c''s or s''s so she would just leave them out. One day she was going to the bathroom and started singing "I''ve Got Peace Like a River."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde (let''s call her Blonde #1) and her twin sister (let''s call her Blonde #2) were celebrating the twin''s birthday and Blonde#2 gave Blonde#1 a present. Blonde#1: "Oh, thank you so much! When''s your birthday? I have to start planning what to get you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found this on a can of Juicey-Juice 100% Juice. Just add water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why could Long John Silver never find an aspirin? A: ''Cause his parrots ate them all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do bakers with a sense of humor bake wry bread?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Psychiatrist: What''s your problem? Patient: I think I''m a chicken. Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on? Patient: Ever since I was an egg!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A quite sobered-up drunk is at Sunday mass listening to a long boring sermon. Feeling still hungover and tired, he finally nods out hoping no one will notice. The priest has been watching him all along and at the end of the sermon, decides to make an example out of him. "Who in this room would like a place in heaven, please stand up," he exclaims. The whole room stands up, except, of course, for one. Obviously displeased, he now says loudly, "And he who would like to find a place in hell please STAND UP." The man, catching only the last part, groggily stands up, only to find that he''s the only one standing up. Confused and embarrassed he says, "I don''t know what we''re voting on here, Father, but sure seems like you and me are the only ones standing for it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A: One drunk Irishman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After picking up food for his daughter''s cat, George spied a new bowl for the pet and grabbed it too. "Shall I have the cat''s name written on the side of the bowl?" offered the store owner. "No, don''t bother," replied George. "He can''t read anyway."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, in a busy lounge in the deep south, a reindeer walked in the door, bellied up to the bar, and ordered a martini. Without batting an eye, the bartender mixed and poured the drink, set it in front of the reindeer, and accepted the twenty-dollar bill from the reindeer''s hoof. As he handed the reindeer some coins in change he said, "You know, I think you''re the first reindeer I''ve ever seen in here." The reindeer looked hard at the hoof full of change and said, "Hmmmpf. Let me tell you something buddy. At these prices I''m the last reindeer you''ll see in here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other. - During your initial consultation, he tries to sell you Amway. - He tells you that his last good case was a "Budweiser." - During the trial you catch him playing his Gameboy. - He ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went into the kitchen, and there was a tap on the window. Not using that plumber again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two wrongs do not make a right, but three rights make a left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is that right, that you Dubliners always answer a question with another question? "Now, who would be telling you that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Dustin Dustin who? Dust in the air, please let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she didn''t have enough food, she rang 911.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING: SOME PEOPLE MAY FIND THIS RACIST, ALTHOUGH I MEAN NO OFFENCE. What do you call a Pakistani in a microwave? Ba-ding!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A scientist is researching storms, so he goes out to find one. He takes his blonde assistant to help him find one. They drive for miles until they come to some plains. They stop the car and the scientist tells the blonde to look out for tornados. After a few minutes, a cow flies past due to strong winds and the blonde says, "Look! A flying cow!" The scientist writes this down on his notepad but as he does, the car gets swept away by a tornado. The car lands in a ditch after the tornado had gone. The scientist got out and shouted at the blonde, "I thought you were looking out for tornados!" "I was, but after I saw the cow, I was looking for the dish running away with the spoon."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Candy. Candy who? Candy door even open?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your Mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bunch of girls had become upset at an anthropology professor who had a knack of offending women. They decided the next time he did something offensive they would all stand up and walk out of his class. Sure enough, at the very next class meeting while discussing a tribe of African natives, the professor leered and said, "You''ll be interested to know the average tribal warrior there has a cock twelve inches long." The girls all rose in a large mass and headed for the door. The professor sneered and said, "What''s your hurry, girls? The next flight to there isn''t until Saturday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gang of counterfeiters get a new extremely expensive printing machine, and at great expense, buy some plates, which they were assured were 99.9% perfect. They buy a large consignment of paper which also was virtually identical to the real paper. Gleefully, they switch on the machine and print a few off. They were delighted with the quality of the paper, the inks, and the printing itself - it would fool the best investigators in the whole world - if it wasn''t for the fact that the notes were all 18 notes! What were they to do? Eventually, someone suggested going over to Ireland, and changing some of their 18 notes - those stupid Irish wouldn''t realise they were being conned! A few days later, and they''re in a small Irish pub in the back of beyond, and they ask if they could change one of their beautiful 18 notes. "Sure, no problem," says the barman. "Would you like 3 6 notes or 2 9?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyer: "Judge, I wish to appeal my client''s case on the basis of newly discovered evidence." Judge: "And what is the nature of the new evidence?" Lawyer: "Judge, I discovered that my client still has $500 left."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Only in America can a pizza guy get to your door faster than an ambulance. - Why do slow-down and slow-up mean the same thing? - Why are wise man and wise guy opposites? - Why is it that when stuff goes on a truck it''s called a shipment and on a boat it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An independent woman started her own business. She was shrewd and diligent, so business kept coming in. Pretty soon she realized she needed an in-house counsel and so she began interviewing young lawyers. "As I''m sure you can understand," she started off with one of the first applicants, "in a business like this, our personal integrity must be beyond question." She leaned forward; "Mr. Peterson, are you an ''honest'' lawyer?" "Honest?" replied the job prospect. "Let me tell you something about honest. Why, I''m so honest that my dad lent me fifteen thousand dollars for my education and I paid back every penny the minute I tried my very first case." "Impressive. And what sort of case was that?" He squirmed in his seat and admitted, "My dad sued me for the money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes up to his best friend and says, "Dude, I need you to do something for me, no questions asked." "Okay," says the friend. "What is it?" "I said no questions!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl was calling her boyfriend because he wasn''t online and she wanted him to be. "Hello?" he said, groggily. "I want you to get up and get your ass online." she said. "How?" "I don''t know. Get a scanner if you need to. Just get your ass online!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a small southern town there was a "Nativity Scene" that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it. One small feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing firemen''s helmets. Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left. At a "Quik Stop" on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets. She exploded into a rage, yelling at me, "You stupid Yankees never do read the Bible!" I assured her that I did, but simply couldn''t recall anything about firemen in the Bible. She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and ruffled through some pages, and finally jabbed her finger at a passage. Sticking it in my face, she said, "See, it says right here, ''The three wise man came from afar.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Know why men are men and women are WOmen? Men keep saying - WO man, check out her boobs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a teenaged girl name Amanda, who just stepped out of the shower. She wrapped a towel around her body, and went into her room. She was very excited because her long time crush, Jason, was coming over to have dinner. She turned the radio on and her favorite song was playing, so she started to dance and sing. When the song was over she stopped dancing and realized that her towel had come off. She looked towards the door and saw that it was open, and Jason was standing there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With over %d jokes submitted and ranked by users like you, Wocka has the largest collection anywhere on the internet. All of these jokes have been submitted by user like you. Join our community and chat with your fellow commedians and jokers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An active message board with hundreds of topics in which to participate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Send private messages to your friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First click the Community button. Then click the Public Fourum button. The first forum is for writing jokes. Discuss how to write funny jokes here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have a funny story? Share it here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Play or chat about games in here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Talk about anything you want here. O.K. I will. You really need to quit submitting jokes like this. Anybody agree with me?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TV, Movies, Music, Books...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?" The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry." Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, "What are you thinking now?" He replied, "It looks as if I did a pretty good job."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Emily, I don''t know what to do, Gloria said to her friend at work. "That good-looking Alan in accounting asked me out for Saturday night. Should I go?" "Oh, my gosh," her friend exclaimed. "He''ll wine you, dine you, and then use any ruse to get you up to his apartment. Then he''ll rip off your dress and you''ll have fantastic sex!" "What should I do?" "Wear an old dress."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These guidelines are not hard rules for submitting acceptable jokes, but they will help you submit a jokes that the most people will enjoy and rank highly, thus increasing your score.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We highly encourage you to do a quick spell check of your joke before submitting it. You can easily do this by copying and pasting the joke into Microsoft Word or some other program that can spell check the text from your joke. Also, you can use Dictionary.com to look up difficult words and how to spell them. Jokes with numerous spelling errors reduce their enjoyability and get lower scores than jokes that are error free.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Using proper punctuation, grammar, and spacing is highly recommended because it makes your jokes readable and understandable. If people are having a hard time understanding your jokes, they will be rated poorly and your score will suffer because of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please properly capitalize the title of the joke and each sentence within the joke. Proper names should also be capitalized.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please choose and acceptable rating for the joke(G=for all ages; PG=mild PG-13=really violent R=Explicit) before you submit it. People of different ages and preferences read different jokes on this website. If you give a G rating to a dirty joke, some users may get upset and rank your joke poorly. For more information, please read our FAQ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Try to refrain from referring to this website or the users of this website in the jokes you post on Wocka. This is mainly because most of the people who read the jokes might not understand the reference to a particular person and they will rate the joke poorly because they do not understand it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please do not submit jokes that are copyrighted by someone else. Or ask for permission from the author before you use copyrighted jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To add a joke to this list: Click the "Add to My Favorites" link when you are viewing a joke. To get rid of one of your favorite jokes: Go to your favorite jokes page. Next to each joke there is a garbage can icon. Click on the icon to get rid of that joke from your favorite''s page.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This list shows all your Wocka Buddies. To add someone to this list: First, find your buddy and click on their name. This brings up their profile. Then, in the Buddy list box it will say Add _______ to your buddy list. __ people have _______ listed as their buddy. ______ has ___ people has their buddies. Click on: Add _______ to your buddy list.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m really too tired and unable to do my home work, the son protested to his father. "Now my son, hard work has never killed any one yet, at least not at your age." "Yes, but I don''t want to run the risk of being the first!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Tex Tex who? Tex two to tango.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they call it "drug abuse" when the person "abusing the drugs" then ends up with half of his brain being rendered useless?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Right now I''m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I''ve forgotten this before. I got a new shadow. I had to get rid of the other one . . . It wasn''t doing what I was doing. I was in the grocery store. I saw a sign that said, "pet supplies." So I did. One time I went to a drive-in in a taxi cab. The movie cost me $95. I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren''t included, so I had to buy them again. I''m writing an unauthorized autobiography. I was once arrested for walking in someone else''s sleep. My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It''s in the apartment somewhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect. If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happen if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. There''s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. I didn''t get a toy train like the other kids. I got a toy subway instead. You couldn''t see anything, but every now and then you''d hear this rumbling noise go by. I used to own an ant farm but had to give it up. I couldn''t find tractors small enough to fit it. I saw a man with a wooden leg, and a real foot. I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be a bartender at the Betty Ford Clinic. I bought a house, on a one-way dead-end road. I don''t know how I got there. I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I''m gone. I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I''m the only one moving. I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn''t have to go so fast. I had to stop driving my car for a while... The tires got dizzy. My neighbour has a circular driveway... He can''t get out. I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn''t park anywhere near the place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she wanted to go shopping for a new belt so she reached into the sky, then pulled off one of Saturn''s rings and said, "Yep! Perfect fit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I fly, I go Air Bizarre. It''s a good airline. You buy a one-way round trip ticket. You leave any Monday and they bring you back the previous Friday... That way you still have the weekend. If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back? I broke a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. If the pen is mightier than the sword, in a duel I''ll let you have the pen! I was cleaning out my closet and I found a swim suit that I had made out of sponges. I remember one time when I wore it. When I got out of the swimming pool nobody could go swimming until I came back. The other day, when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree. It doesn''t matter what temperature the room is; it''s always room temperature. I have a very rare photograph. It shows Houdini locking his keys in his car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A male teen walks up to his uncle. "Where''s Aunt Rhodie?" said the teen. "In the living room," said his uncle. The teen walks to the door. "I wouldnt go in there if I were you," said the uncle, "they''re talking about female things." The male teen walks in anyway - (a moment in the hall passes) - the teen comes out all grossed out. "What''s wrong?" said the uncle. "I thought you meant SHOES!" said the teen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever heard of the Gay Mafia? No? If you don''t pay up, they come round your house, and criticize your curtains!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English teacher wrote this phrase on the board and asked her students to properly punctuate it: "Woman without her man is nothing." MEN WROTE: Woman, without her man, is nothing. WOMEN WROTE: Woman! Without her, man is nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are some favorite sayings from people all over the world. Doctor: Oops. Secretary: I''m pregnant! Travel Agent: I know what you did last summer... Michael Jackson: I didn''t do it! Bill Clinton: I didn''t do it! Oh wait...Yes, I did. Computer Programmer: H0w d0 y0u w0rk th15 "Ch355" g4m3?? 1 N33D H3LP!!!111// Pilot: Are we there yet? Mad Scientist: I like Cows! Cell Phone Tester: Can you hear me now? Video Gamer: Can the line lag any further?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What to you call it when your pet jackrabbit dies? A: A bad "Hare" day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is instructing her fourth grade class, and she''s telling them that the word of the day is ''contagious.'' She asks if anyone can use this word in a sentence, and several students raise their hands. "Carl," she says. Carl says, "My dad told me to stay away from kids with mumps, ''cause they''re contagious." "Very good," says the teacher. Then she picks Suzie, who says, "The atmosphere was contagious." The teacher says, "Excellent, Suzie!" Then she notices that little Johnny has his hand up at the back of the class. "Yes, Johnny?"she says. Johnny replies, "The other day, me and my dad''s a-sittin'' around, and we saw our blonde neighbor painting her fence. She had a tiny little model car paintbrush, and she was going in tiny little strokes up and down the fence, and my dad says to me, ''Jesus, it''s gonna take that cunt ages to finish that fence.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? There weren''t any cars coming!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a Japanese man who went to America for sightseeing. On the last day, he hailed a cab and told the driver to drive to the airport. During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi. Thereupon, the man leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled, "Honda, very fast! Made in Japan!" After a while, a Toyota sped past the taxi. Again, the Japanese man leaned out of the window and yelled, "Toyota, very fast! Made in Japan!" And then a Mitsubishi sped past the taxi. For the third time, the Japanese leaned out of the window and yelled, "Mitsubishi, very fast! Made in Japan!" The driver was a little angry, but he kept quiet, as this went on for quite a number of cars. Finally, the taxi came to the airport. The fare was $300. The Japanese man exclaimed, "Wah... so expensive!" The driver yelled back, "Meter, very fast! Made in Japan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These four guys were walking down the street; a Saudi, a Russian, a North Korean, and a New Yorker. A reporter comes running up and says, "Excuse me, what is your opinion about the meat shortage?" The Saudi says, "What''s ''shortage''?" The Russian says, "What''s ''meat''?" The North Korean says, "What''s ''opinion''?" The New Yorker, says, "''Excuse me''? What''s ''excuse me''?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('. When young Jose, newly arrived in the United States, made his first trip to Yankee Stadium, there were no tickets left for sale. Touched by his disappointment, a friendly ticket salesman found him a perch near the American flag. Later, Jose wrote home enthusiastically about his experience. "And the Americans, they are so friendly!" he concluded. "Before the game started, they all stood up and looked at me and sang, ''Jose, can you see?''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Martin had just received his brand new driver''s license. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them for a ride for the first time. Dad immediately heads for the back seat, directly behind the newly minted driver. "I''ll bet you''re back there to get a change of scenery after all those months of sitting in the front passenger seat teaching me how to drive," says the beaming boy to his father. "Nope," comes dad''s reply, "I''m gonna sit here and kick the back of your seat as you drive, just like you''ve been doing to me all these years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there? *silence*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black priest? Holy Shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With all the new technology regarding fertility, an 88-year-old woman was able to give birth to a baby recently. When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, various relatives came to visit. "May we see the new baby?" one of them asked. "Not yet," said the mother. "I''ll make coffee and we can visit for a while first." Another half hour passed before another relative asked, "May we see the new baby now?" "No, not yet," said the mother. A while later and again the guests asked, "May we see the baby now?" "No, not yet," replied the mother. Growing impatient, they asked, "Well, when can we see the baby?" "When she cries!" she told them. "When she cries?" they gasped. "Why do we have to wait until she cries?" "Because, I forgot where I put her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER: How old were you on your last birthday? STUDENT: Seven. TEACHER: How old will you be on your next birthday? STUDENT: Nine. TEACHER: That''s impossible. STUDENT: No it isn''t, teacher. I''m eight today. ********************************************************** TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America. GEORGE: Here it is! TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? CLASS: George!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This young fellow was about to be married and was asking his grandfather about sex. He asked how often you should have it. His grandfather told him, "When you first get married, you want it all the time, and maybe you''ll do it several times a day. Later on, sex tapers off and you have it once a week or so. Then, as you get older, you have sex maybe once a month. When you get really old,you are lucky to have it once a year, like maybe on your anniversary." The young fellow then asks his grandfather, "Well, how about you and Grandma now?" His grandfather replied,"Oh, we just have oral sex now." "What''s oral sex?" the young fellow asked. "Well," Grandpa said, "she goes to bed in her bedroom and I go to bed in my bedroom. She yells,''Screw You!'' and I holler back,''Screw You too!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Indian chief is driving his Cadillac somewhere in Nevada when his car breaks down. He examines it and finds that a technician must be called, but the chief has only $4 and no credit card. So he gathers some wood, makes a fire and signals his tribe with its smoke: "Hey, send somebody to my location with $500!" The tribe accepts this signal, but to make sure of its meaning, signals back - once again, with smoke: "OK, chief, but why so much?" At this moment a ground test of nuclear bomb is held on the test field nearby. A huge mushroom-like cloud of smoke rises into the sky. The tribe signals: "Ok, Ok, chief, we just wondered, no need to get mad!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are headlines that *might* have appeared in papers in the aftermath of Little Bighorn - Variety: "Custer Closes Out of Town" Pravda: "Big Red Victory" Sports Illustrated: "Indians Win Series" Women''s Wear Daily: "Feathers Make Comeback" Reader''s Digest: "Sitting Bull Reveals New Cure for Dandruff" The Washington Post: "Custer Loses Rural Vote"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An F-111 was flying escort with a B-52 and generally making a nuisance of himself by flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber. The message for the B-52 crew was, "Anything you can do, I can do better." Not to be outdone, the bomber pilot announced that he would rise to the challenge. The B-52, however, continued its flight, straight and level. Perplexed, the fighter pilot asked, "I''m waiting, what are you going to do?" "We just shut down two engines."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new soldier was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear - no car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield. A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back. The sentry said, "Halt, who goes there?" The chauffeur, a corporal, says, "General Wheeler." "I''m sorry, I can''t let you through. You''ve got to have a sticker on the windshield." The general said, "Drive on!" The sentry said, "Hold it! You really can''t come through. I have orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker." The general repeated, "I''m telling you, son, drive on!" The sentry walked up to the rear window and said, "General, I''m new at this. Do I shoot you or the driver?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A soldier had lost his bayonet and whittled one from wood so he could stand inspection. He was hoping not to be discovered until the regiment had gone into battle where he could pick up one from a dead soldier. At an inspection, an officer asked to see his bayonet. The soldier stated, "Sir, I promised my father I would never unsheathe my bayonet unless I intended to kill with it." The officer insisted he hand over the bayonet. Taking it out, the soldier looked skyward and declared, "May the Lord change this bayonet to wood for breaking my vow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blond labourers looking for work arrive at a railway station, and ask for one-way tickets. The ticket-seller looks through his schedule, but can''t find the place the blonds are seeking. "But you must be able to find it," says one. "We read in the papers that there are thousands of jobs in Jeopardy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What happens when you pour boiling water on a bunny? A: A hot cross-buniken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A parachute used once, but has never been open!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Eileen. Eileen who? Eileen on the door until you open it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s cooking so bad, she''s got a toothbrush next to her plate instead of a knife!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s mum was sitting in front of computer while Johnny was making sandwiches. She said to Johhny, "You''re the best sandwich maker ever," and Johnny says "No mum, you''re just lazy." hahahahahahahahahahaha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the boy buy a new bum? Coz his had a crack in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mum told me that picking my nose was disgusting, and from now on, I had to pick it myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was talking to my sister''s boyfriend one day and I asked him if prettyful was a word. He said, "Well, I use it a lot. Whenever I''ve just eaten and someone asks me if I''m hungry, I say ''I''m pretty full."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there? can''t catch. can''t catch who? me, you can''t catch me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This hillbilly is traveling across Texas when a state policeman pulls him over. "You got any I.D.?" the patrolman asked. "''Bout what?" the hillbilly replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A deputy police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The "disturbance" turned out to be well over six feet tall and weighed almost 300 pounds. What''s more, he boasted that he could whip the deputy and Muhammad Ali too. Said the policeman, "I''ll bet that you''re also an escape artist - probably better than Houdini." The giant nodded. "If I had some chains," the deputy continued, "you could show us how strong you really are. But all I''ve got is a set of handcuffs. Why don''t you see just how quickly you can break out of them?" Once in the cuffs, the man puffed, pulled and jerked for four minutes. "I can''t get out of these," the giant growled. "Are you sure?" the deputy asked. The fellow tried again. "Nope," he replied. "I can''t do it." "In that case," said the deputy, "you''re under arrest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man being mugged by two thugs put up a tremendous fight! Finally, the thugs subdued him and took his wallet. Upon finding only two dollars in the wallet, the surprised thug said "Why did you put up such a fight?" To which the man replied, "I was afraid that you would find the $200 hidden in my shoe!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: "How''s your history paper coming?" Woman: "Well, my history professor suggested that I use the Internet for research, and it''s been very helpful." Man: "Really?" Woman: "Yes! I''ve already located 17 people who sell them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at a yard sale one day and saw a box marked "Electronic cat and dog caller -- guaranteed to work." I looked inside and was amused to see an electric can opener.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police detective was investigating a homicide. As he questioned the on-scene officer, he learned the body was that of a young woman. The body was found with a bowl over her head and a spoon stuck in her back. The on-scene officer asked what the detective thought had happened to the woman. The detective responded, "I think it''s obvious. A cereal killer got her!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Maida. Maida who? Maida force be with you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The theory of evolution was greatly objected to because it made man think. Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillers. The dodo is a bird that is almost decent by now. To remove air from a flask, fill it with water, tip the water out, and put the cork in quick before the air can get back in. The process of turning steam back into water again is called conversation. A magnet is something you find crawling all over a dead cat. The Earth makes one resolution every 24 hours. The cuckoo bird does not lay his own eggs. To collect fumes of sulfur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube. Parallel lines never meet, unless you bend one or both of them. Algebraical symbols are used when you do not know what you are talking about. Geometry teaches us to bisex angles. A circle is a line which meets its other end without ending. The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you noticed since most people have a camcorder these days there are not as many people talking about seeing UFOs as there use to be?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Abbott. Abbott who? Abbott time you answered the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Ten percent of all car thieves are left-handed. 2. All Polar Bears are left-handed. 3. If your car is stolen, there''s a 10 percent chance it was taken by a Polar Bear. 1. 39 percent of unemployed men wear spectacles. 2. 80 percent of employed men wear spectacles. 3. Work stuffs up your eyesight. 1. A total of 4000 cans are opened around the world every second. 2. Ten babies are conceived around the world every second. 3. Each time you open a can, you stand a 1 in 400 chance of becoming pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aig - What a hen lays. Aints - He''s got aints in his paints. Paints - What cha put on your laigs of a morning. Arn - Ma''s tard of arnin. Bag - He bagged her to marry him. Bobbed - A bobbed wire fence. Bresh - He had a bresh with the law, and the law won. Bub - the light bub burned out. Cheer - What you set in. Crick - A small stream. Clum - He sure clum that tree fastern any ''coon. Chiny - country over in Asia. Chuch duds - Sunday go-to-meetin clothes. Core - He got hisself a new Ford core. Cyow - Animal on Farm. Deppity - He helps out the shurf.. Dribbed - He dribbed milk on his shirt. Dainz - Satidy night social. Ellum - A graceful tree. Fanger - What you put your rang on. Faince - Whats round the hawg lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Far - What get the brandin arn hot. Furred - He got furred from his job. Flar - A rose is a purdy flar. Frash - Them aigs ain''t frash. Furiners - All non-''bamans. Further - Hits ten miles further to town. Grain - She was grain with envy. Hail - Where bad folks go. Hep - Poor George, he can''t hep it, he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Hern - It aint hern, it''s his''n. Hilbilly - People in the next county. Hollar What''s between the hills. Hard - Got a brend new hard. Tar - His core blew a tar. Laymun - A sour fruit. Laig - Most folks have two of them. Lather - What you climb up. Liberry - Where you go to check out books for larnin. Mailk - what you get from cyows. Mere - What you see yourself in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Minners - Live bait. Misrus - Married woman. Nar - Opposite of wide. Nayk - Your head sets on it. Nup No. Orrel - Them hinges need orrel. Ormy - What the sojers go in. Pank - A light red color. Parch - Sit out on the parch and watch the grass grow. Petition - What separate the rooms. Poke - A paper bag or sack. Pokey - What the shurf and deppity puts crimnals in. Salit - A green vegetable. Puppet - What the preacher is in. Purdy - She is purdy as a pitcher. Purt near - Almost; he purt near caught that greased pig. Rang - You wear it on your fanger. Rut - That there tree sure has long ruts. Rah cheer - I was born rah cheer in town.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rainch - A big cow farm. Rat - Do it rat now! Rench - Rench the soap yourself. Roont - She plum roont her shoes. Salary - A stringy vegetable. Soardeens - Small canned fish. Shar - A light rain. Gully Worsher - A medium heavy rain. Toad strangler - A heavy rain Sody. Pop - A soft drink. Sprang - Water out''n the ground. Shurf - The Shurf put Clem in jail. Storch - This here aprn has too much storch in it. Skeered - that plumb skeered me to death. Thanks - He shore thanks he''s smart. Tho - Tho me the ball. Thoat - I shore got a sore thoat. War - A bobbed war fance. Worsh - Go worsh your face. Warter - What you worsh your face in. Yurp - A continent overseas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For a REAL sponge cake, BORROW all the ingredients. Diplomacy - the art of letting someone have your way. A seminar on time travel will be held two weeks ago. Give and you might receive; take and be sure. I can''t remember the last time I forgot something. I''m not schizophrenic, and neither am I. In an atomic attack, all men will be cremated equal. It''s bad luck to be superstitious. I''ve been meaning to start procrastinating for some time now. Logic the art of being wrong, with confidence. Old age isn''t so bad, when you consider the alternative. Shin a device for finding furniture in the dark. "Very funny, Scotty, now beam down my clothes." No matter where you go, there you are. What are occasional tables the rest of the time?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are my summer clothes. Summer paid for, summer not. How do you get down from an elephant? You don''t, you get down from a duck. Why couldn''t anyone play cards on the ark? Because Noah sat on the deck. Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other "You drive, I''ll man the guns." The Russians are very jealous of the American''s Stealth Bombers, so they''ve decided to build their own. It''ll be called the Optical Illyushin. One good turn... gets all the blankets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took lessons in bicycle riding, but I could only afford half of them. Now I can ride a unicycle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God was in Heaven and was getting particularly bored. "Oh what can I do?" he exclaimed. St. Peter came up to him and suggested he take a vacation. "That''s a great idea, but where should I go?" asked God. "How about the moon?" suggested St. Peter. "Well, I could, but there''s no gravity on the moon," stated God "Then how about the Earth?" When St. Peter said this God''s eyes widened and he said, "Are you mad? I went there 2000 years ago, met a nice Jewish girl and they''re still talking about it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mosquitos consider most people as food, but grandma''s an open bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ll tell ya later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was staying over at a farmer''s house for the night. However, the farmer warned: "My daughter is sleeping in the room next door. I''m going to put a wall of eggs around her bed to make sure that you don''t go near her, understand?" The man nodded weakly, for she saw the daughter and noticed she was very beautiful. That night, the man crept into the daughter''s room, and sure enough, there was a wall of eggs surrounding her bed. Alas, the daughter''s beauty was too much for the man, and he pushed through the wall of eggs and made love to her. Once they were finished, the man took out a mop and cleaned the mess up. He then used super glue to glue the eggs back together and restack them. He then went back to his room. The next day, the farmer inspected the wall of eggs. He congratulated the man and celebrated with an egg feast. But when he took an egg off the wall and cracked it open, nothing came out. The farmer groaned, "Not again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mate''s a maniakleptic he walks into shops backwards and leaves things. Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play? "It is better to have loved a short man, than never to have loved a tall." If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog horns out of? If you jog backwards, will you gain weight? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? We painted our floor with luminous paint. So now the florescent what it used to be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is proven that the celebration of birthdays is healthy. Statistics show that those people who celebrate the most birthdays become the oldest. - S. den Hartog, Ph D. Thesis Universtity of Groningen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and makes a lot of noise? A zebra with a drum.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had a tick before? asked Mel. "No, I''ve only ever had crosses," replied Sally.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Vincent, not to be presumptuous, but your short story is truly fantastic. Did you really write it? Vincent: Yes, I wrote, while my mother dictated...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shakespeare walks into a bar and the bartender shouts at him, "You can''t come in here, you''re Bard!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do doughnut shops need security systems?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, I gave her a piggyback ride and I got scoliosis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear, a lion and a chicken were having a discussion as to which one of them scares humans the most. "I only have to growl," said the bear, "and people start to get a bit nervous." The lion said, "I just have to roar and people run away." "That''s nothing," replied the chicken. "I only have to sneeze and the whole world panics."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bees in their hive on a lovely summer day, and one says to the other, "''Swarm in here, isn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Santa when he''s been to the beach? Sandy Claus!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? He. He who? He who must not be named, so don''t say it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student on a class trip to the natural-history museum asks the guard, "Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?" The guard tells him, "Three-million-four years and six months old." The student says. "How do you know that so precisely?" The guard says, "Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the bald man say when he was given a comb for his birthday? "Oh, thank you! I''ll never part with it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Charles the First walked and talked half an hour after his head was cut off. Make sense? It should be- "Charles the First walked and talked. Half an hour after, his head was cut off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everybody knows about the kangaroo, the tall marsupial that lives in Australia, but when settlers first went there, they were amazed and had never seen anything like them. They asked an aborigine what the animals were called. He replied, "Kangaroo," so that is what the settlers called them. Little did they know, kangaroo is an aboriginal phrase meaning, "I don''t understand your question."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish guy was digging a hole in his front lawn, when his neighbour walks by and says, "Hey, Patrick, what are you doing?" "Digging a hole," said Patrick. "What''s wrong with the hole next to it?" said his neighbour. "That one wasn''t deep enough," said Patrick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Steve is playing with his 3 friends at his tree in the back garden, and his mum comes out and shouts, "If all four of you fall out of that tree and break both legs, then don''t come running to me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so fat that when I swerved around her in my car, I ran out of petrol!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid, you traded your car in for petrol!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re as bright as a broken lightbulb!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re as funny as a ripped-up joke book!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('you''re as smart as a broken calculator!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first you don''t suceed...lower your standards!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was trying to impress his mum on his new bike. He was going down the path and said to his mum, "Look, mum, no feet!" He then put his feet back on the bike and removed his hands from the handlebars. He then shouted, "Look, mum, no hands!" He then lost control of the bike and collided with a tree. His mum ran up to his side, whereas her son said, "Look, mum, no teeth."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Chuck Norris jumps in a pool he dosent get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris''d. Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a horse. It''s decendants are know as giraffes. Chuck Norris doesn''t need oxygen, oxygen needs Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris doesn''t pay off debt, debt pays off Chuck Norris.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Becky prepared a pasta dish for a dinner party she was giving. In her haste, however, she forgot to refrigerate the spaghetti sauce, and it sat on the counter all day. She was worried about spoilage, but it was too late to cook up another batch. She called the local Poison Control Center and voiced her concern. They advised Becky to boil the sauce again. That night, the phone rang during dinner, and one of the guests volunteered to answer it. Becky''s face dropped as the guest called out, "It''s the Poison Control Center. They want to know how the spaghetti sauce turned out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandpa was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how athletic and well-preserved he appeared. "Gentlemen, I will tell you the secret of my success," he cackled. "I have been in the open air day after day for some 75 years now." The celebrants were impressed and asked how he managed to keep up his rigorous fitness regime. "Well, you see my wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding night, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had a fight, the one who was proved wrong would go outside and take a walk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Dot. Dot who? Dots for me to know, and you to find out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To get your Star Wars name, do the following: 1) Start with the 1st 3 letters of your last name 2) Add the first two letters of your first name 3) Add the first two letters of your mother''s maiden name 4) Add the first two letters of the city in which you were born 5) Then, if you want, you can remove one letter to make it sound cool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The can was invented quite a while before the can opener.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the planters guy beating up fruit spread? Peanut battering jelly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy goes to see his doctor - "Doctor, please help me, I''ve got kleptomania bad!" "OK, take these pills, one a day, but if they''ve not worked in a month, could you get me an LCD telly?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In "The Greatest Story Ever Told", John Wayne played a centurion at the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. One of his lines was, "Truly he is the Son of God!" The director felt John W. wasn''t putting enough into it, and asked him to deliver the line again, but with a little more emphasis - "to put some awe into it". "OK," says John, "Awww - truly he is the Son of God!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honey, the car won''t start, but I know what the problem is, Kathy said. Chuck asked her what it was, and she told him there was water in the carburettor. Chuck thought for a moment, then said, "You know, I don''t mean to be offensive, but you don''t know the carburetor from the accelerator." "No, there''s definitely water in the carburettor," Kathy insisted. "OK honey, that''s fine, I''ll just go take a look. Where is it?" "In the lake!" she said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Charlie: "My wife has the worst memory ever." Tom: "She forgets everything, huh?" Charlie: "No, she REMEMBERS everything!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so stupid she took wood to the movie SAW!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We all know that a good old fashioned zombie says "Braaaaiiiiins!" But what would these zombies say? A Vegan Zombie - "Graaaaaiiiiins!" A 1940''s Mobster Zombie - "Daaaaaaames!" A Michael Jordan Zombie - "Haaaaaayynes!" A Vampire Zombie - "Veeeeeeeiiiiins!" A Masochistic Zombie - "Paaaaaiiiiiins!" A Maid Zombie - "Staaaaaiiiins!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to the dentist and says, "How much to get these two teeth pulled?" "$80 a tooth," he replies. "For two minutes work! That''s crazy!" said the patient. "Trust me," said the dentist, "You don''t want me to do it any slower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This big-time rancher from Texas met a Missouri farmer on a business trip. The Texas rancher bragged, "I can get in my truck, drive all day, and never cross the boundary of my ranch!" "Yep," replied the little Missouri farmer, "I had a truck like that once, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She left him because he had a will of his own. And it wasn''t made out to her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A detective was questioning a burglary suspect. "Where were you between five and six?" he asked. "In kindergarten!" he replied', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy called to his mother from the yard, "Mom, would you rather me fall out of a tree and break my arm or just tear a hole in my Sunday slacks?" "Well," she replied, "I guess I''d pray that you just ripped your pants." The kid yells back, "Your prayers have been answered!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sucessful business man became disenchanted with the stress of the fast life in the big city and decides to chuck it all. He takes his savings and purchases a large ranch in the middle of nowhere in Montana. After a couple of months of enjoying the solitude, he hears the drumming of hoofbeats outside his cabin. Grabbing his rifle he challenges the man riding up on the horse. "Hold it, neighbor," the man says, "I''m your neighbor, I have a ranch only six miles from here, and I want to invite you to a Welcome Party I''m throwing for you next Saturday. There''s going to be music, dancing, hugging, kissing, drinking, fighting.... We''ll have a great time." Not wanting to be unneighborly the new rancher lowers the rifle and asks, "How should I dress?" "Aw, don''t matter," replied the neighbor, "Only gonna be the two of us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Radio. Radio Who? Radio not, here I come!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One chicken says to the other, "For heaven''s sake, don''t cross the road! We''ll never hear the end of it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she turns around another year has passed already!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she needs mapquest to find her butt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Haf. Haf who. Haf you ever opened the door because I''m tired of waiting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma smells so bad the skunk gave her his stripe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? I doughnut want to know if you''re sick!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George Carlin said it best about Martha Stewart: "Boy, I feel a lot safer now that she''s behind bars. O. J. Simpson and Kobe Bryant are still walking around; Osama Bin Laden too, but they take the ONE woman in America willing to cook, clean, and work in the yard, and they haul her fanny off to jail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Frenchman, the German, and the Israeli were standing around in the cafe in Tel Aviv, comparing their lifestyles. "When I go to work," said the Frenchman, "I drive my Renault. On weekends I drive my $30,000 Peugeot. And when I travel abroad, I always drive a $50,000 Citroen." "Bah,"said the German, "I drive a Volkswagen to work. But on weekends I drive a $50,000 BMW, and when I go abroad, I always take my customized $60,000 Mercedes." "Very impressive," the Israeli admitted. "As for me, I take the bus to work, and on Sundays I motor around in my little Ford. But when I go abroad, I drive a $250,000 tank.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ducking into confession with a turkey in his arms, the man said, "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. I stole this turkey to feed my family. Would you take it and assuage my guilt?" "Certainly not," said the priest. "As penance, you must return it to the one from whom you stole it." "I-I tried," the man sobbed, "but he refused. Oh, Father, what should I do?" "If what you say is true, then it is all right for you to keep it for your family." Thanking the priest, the man hurried off. When confession was over, the priest returned to his residence. When he walked into the kitchen, he found that someone had stolen his Thanksgiving turkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After she was finished with Cinderella, the fairy godmother paid a visit on another poor young girl, Minuetta. Extremely flat-chested, the woman is convinced that her life would improve if only she had large breasts. "All right," the fairy godmother said. "How about we fix it so that every time a man says ''pardon'' to you, your breasts grow a bit." Delighted with the arrangement, Minuetta goes to the market next day. Bumping into the woodcutter, she''s delighted when he tips his hat, says, "I beg your pardon," and her breasts grow nearly an inch. Later, when a coachmean accidentally splashes mud on her, he stops and says, "Pardon me." Her breasts grow again. Smiling radiantly when she reaches the market, she goes to the vegetable stand and asks the Arab merchant for some bread. While he''s handing it to her, he accidentally knocks a tub of jam on her dress. "Oh dear," he bows and scrapes, "a thousand pardons!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. Who''s there? Esther. Esther who? The Esther Bunny. Knock, knock. Who''s there? Stella. Stella who? Stella nother Esther Bunny. Knock, knock. Who''s there? Samoa. Samoa who? Samoa Esther Bunnies. Knock, knock. Who''s there? Consumption. Consumption who? Consumption be done about all these Esther Bunnies? Knock, knock. Who''s there? Esther. Esther who? Esther anyone else as sick of this joke as I am?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mathematicians does it take to replace a lightbulb? Pi. 3 screw exactly a radius''s length, and the last about-one-seventh screws it in all the way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day St. Peter visited Hell to make certain that the sinners were being adequately punished. During his tour he noticed that Hitler was standing in feces up to his chin. Surprisingly, the Fuhrer was smiling. "I don''t understand," sasid St. Peter. "How can you smile when you''ll be spending all of eternity in excrement?" Hitler replied, "I''m smiling because I''m standing on Mussolini''s shoulders."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blind man who went bungee jumping?? V V V V V V V V V V V V V V He loved it, but it scared the heck out of his dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Virginity is like a balloon. One prick and it''s gone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whenever I have to go up in a building, I choose the elevator over the escalator because one time i was on an escalator and I tripped... So i was falling for an hour and a half.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What type of storage units do underwater computers use? A: Trilo-bytes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes to dinner at a new friend''s house. While they eat, the new friend''s small son keeps staring at the guest. Finally, the guest says, ''Why are you staring at me like that, young fellow?'' The kid says, ''Daddy told me you were a self-made man.'' ''I am.'' ''Well, why did you make yourself like that?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Presidents on a sinking ship! Ford says: "What do we do?" Bush says: "Man the lifeboats!" Reagan says: "What lifeboats?" Carter says: "Women first!" Nixon says: "Screw the women!" Clinton says: "You think we have time?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What is a Kentucky Virgin? Answer: A really ugly seven year old girl who can run faster than her older brother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All you see in the sports media nowadays is the fact that athletes are taking steriods and other performance enhanceing drugs to become stronger and faster. So instead of going out and buying a new car I put some steriods in the gas tank.... I wonder if I will get the same result?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An airplane takes off from the airport. The Captain is Jewish and the First Officer is Chinese. It''s the first time they''ve flown together and it''s obvious, by the silence, that they don''t get along. After thirty minutes, the Jewish Captain mutters: "I don''t like Chinese." The First Officer replies: "Oooooh, no like Chinese? Why dat?" "Your people bombed Pearl Harbor. That''s why I don''t like Chinese." "Nooooo, noooo, Chinese not bomb Peahl Hahbah. That Japanese, not Chinese." "Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese... it doesn''t matter, you''re all alike." Another thirty minutes of silence. Finally, the First Officer says: "No like Jew." "Why not? Why don''t you like Jews?" "Jews sink Titanic." "The Jews didn''t sink the Titanic, it was an iceberg." "Iceberg, Goldberg, Rosenberg, Spielberg; no mattah ... all da same." P.S. Chinese Juice - Chinese Jews. Geddit? There''s a joke about it on here somewhere!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two people are discussing whether the state of Hawaii is pronounced ''Havaii'' or ''Hawaii''. So they stood there arguing and arguing, until they decided to ask a person that was walking by. They asked the gentleman: "Excuse me sir, is Hawaii pronounced ''Havaii'' or ''Hawaii''?" The gentleman said, "Havaii." So they looked at each other, and as the gentleman was leaving, one of the two said to him, "Thank you." The gentleman replied, "You''re velcome!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the copilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system. "Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed when a lump of nickel and iron, roughly 150 feet in diameter and weighing 300,000 tons, struck the earth at about 40,000 miles an hour, scattering white-hot debris for miles in every direction. The hole measures nearly a mile across and is 570 feet deep." From the cabin, a passenger was heard to exclaim, "Wow! It just missed the highway!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In front of a delicatessen, an art connoisseur noticed a mangy little kitten lapping up milk from a saucer. The saucer, he realized with a start, was a rare and precious piece of pottery. He strolled into the store and offered two dollars for the cat. "It''s not for sale," said the proprietor. "Look," said the collector, "that cat is dirty and undesirable, but I''m eccentric. I like cats that way. I''ll raise my offer to ten dollars." "It''s a deal," said the proprietor, and pocketed the ten. "For that sum I''m sure you won''t mind throwing in the saucer," said the connoisseur. "The kitten seems so happy drinking from it." "Nothing doing," said the proprietor firmly. "That''s my lucky saucer. From that saucer, so far this week I''ve sold 34 cats."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An exhausted looking blond dragged himself in to the doctor''s office. "Doctor, there are dogs all over my neighborhood. They bark all day and all night, and I can''t get a wink of sleep." "I have good news for you," the doctor answered, rummaging through a drawer full of sample medications. "Here are some new sleeping pills that work like a dream. A few of these and your trouble will be over." "Great," the blond answered, "I''ll try anything. Let''s give it a shot." A few weeks later the blond returned, looking worse than ever. "Doc, your plan is no good. I''m more tired than before!" "I don''t understand how that could be," said the doctor, shaking his head. "Those are the strongest pills on the market!" "That may be true," answered the blond wearily, "but I''m still up all night chasing those dogs and when I finally catch one it''s hard getting him to swallow the pill!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, a man happened upon a magical lamp. He rubbed it and a genie came out. "Are you going to give me three wishes?" the man asked. "No," said the genie. "I am a rare and mystical question genie. I am way more honorable than a simple wish genie! You may ask me three questions." The man thought for a while about what he wanted to ask. This was a once in a lifetime opportunity to unlock the secrets of the world. Finally, he said, "Okay, here''s what I want to know: What is the cure for the common cold? How can perpetual motion be created? And where can a fuel source, that is clean and reusable and will replace all the others, be found?" The genie nodded and walked off. Puzzled, the man came after him. "Hey," he said somewhat angrily, "aren''t you going to answer my questions?" The genie stopped and looked at him with an incredulous expression; "Who the hell do you think I am? A question AND answer genie?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Catherine, a RN, was unhappy with her job, so she submitted her resignation. She was sure she''d have no trouble finding a new position, because of the nursing shortage in her area. She e-mailed cover letters to dozens of potential employers and attached her resume to each one. Two weeks later, Catherine was dismayed and bewildered that she had not received even one request for an interview. Finally she received a message from a prospective employer that explained the reason she hadn''t heard from anyone else. It read: "Your resume was not attached as stated. I do, however, want to thank you for the vegetable lasagna recipe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to find anything? Zero. They have to ask a woman 1st and then after she tells them exactly where it is for the umpteenth time & they still can''t find it..... The now exasperated woman goes & gets it for them in the exact place she has told them it was. Duh!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W. Bush.... that''s it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you ever notice that a lot of people will do just about anything to get attention? Like putting jokes up on a website! P.S I love Wocka.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 100 year old man sits on the edge of his bed on the day of his 100th birthday. He looks down at his feet and says "well feet, you''re 100 years old today!" He then looks at his hands and says, "well hands, you are 100 years old today." He goes into the bathroom, looks in the mirror, and says, "well face, you are 100 years old today." He then goes over to the toilet to relieve himself, and looks down at his penis and says, "Well old buddy, if you would have made it, you would have been 100 years old today!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gummer: Is defined as receiving oral sex from a woman who has no teeth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went to see her doctor for her annual checkup so the doctor gave her the once over. At the end of the checkup he shone a light in her ear to have a look; amazed, he shook his head and walked away. See below what the doctor had seen. A big sign SPACE FOR RENT.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the morning after pill for guys? It changes his blood type.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do women with no legs leave behind when they cross a linoleum floor? Snail Tracks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever seen Moth Balls? You have!!! How did you get their teeny, tiny and poor little legs apart? Ya fiend!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a walrus & tupperware have in common? They both like a "tight" SEAL!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 11999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Jewish beer called? He Brew!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny is approached by the lifeguard at the public swimming pool. "You''re not allowed to pee in the pool," says the lifeguard. "I''m going to report you." "But everyone pees in the pool," whined Little Johnny. "Maybe," answered the lifeguard, "but not from the diving board!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat when jumps up in the air she gets stuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a religious woman and a supposedly regular woman in a bathtub? One has HOPE in her soul.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Made up this joke myself.. Please laugh. When I go all the way blind (2/3 the way there now); my Mommie''s gonna give me a new kitty and tell me that I can only play with it outside & in the street. The Kittie''s name is Pe-Pe-La-Pugh. She tell''s me it''s black & white. Love that kitty. Rhhhhhhhhh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Junk- something you keep for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What can you break without saying its'' name? Silence...Shhh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mystery All my life has been a mystery You and I were never ever meant to be Thats why I call my love for you... a mystery. Different country You and I have always lived in different countries And I know that airline tickets don''t grow on a tree So what kept us apart is plain for me to see That part at least, is not really much of a mystery. Estuary I live on a houseboat on an estuary Which is handy for my work with the port authority But I''m sure you would have found it Insanit-ery Insanit-ery Headed me I am foolish to ignore the possibilty That if we actually met, you might have a taken a really violent dislike of me But thats not the only problem I can see Dead since 1993 You''ve been dead now, wait a minute, let me see, 14 years come next Janu-a-ry As a human beign you are history So why do I still long for you Why is my love so strong for you Why did I write this song for you Well, I guess it''s just a mystery Mystery', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mamma is soooo ugo... When you look in the mirror you die of fright, as you look just like her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and says, "Give me a beer before problems start!" Again, the man orders a beer again saying, "Give me a beer before problems start!" The bartender looks confused. This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man, "When are you going to pay for these beers?" The man answers, "Ah, now the problems start!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a few co-workers at the computer data centre stayed late and all started to feel hungry. They decided to order in food by phone, but their boss thought that, since they worked with computers, it would be more appropriate to order by Internet. After they contacted a fast food chain''s web site and spent a long time registering as new customers for the delivery service, a message appeared on the screen: "Thank you for your business. You will be able to order food in three days."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy wrote this letter to his grandmother: Dear Grandmother, I''m sorry I forgot your birthday last week. It would serve me right if you forgot mine next Tuesday. With love, Mike', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does a 1000 pound bird say?? A: SQUAWK!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What was Jesus when he was resurrected? A: A Born Again Christian', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you get a blonde with one arm out of a tree? A: Wave to her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the first day of school and this girl''s teacher asked her what her name was. She said "Texas." The teacher said, "Haha, no really, what''s your name?" and the girl said, "Texas," so the teacher said, "Go to the principal''s office." The principal said, "What''s your name?" She replied, "Texas." He said, "Funny, what''s your name?" and she said, "Texas," so he sent her home. As Texas was walking home, a guy stopped her and said, "What''s your name?" She said, "Texas." He said, "That''s funny. No, really, what''s your name?" She said, "Texas." He said, "I will stab you with my mother''s butcher knife if you don''t tell me what your real name is," and she said, "IT''S TEXAS!" so he stabbed her. When he got home, his mother asked, "Where''s my butcher knife?" and he sang "DEEP IN THE HEART OF TEXAS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few years ago the battery in my beat-up VW Beetle had died because I left the lights on overnight. I was in a hurry to get to work on time so I ran into the house to get my wife, a blonde, to give me a hand starting the car. I told her to get into our second car, a prehistoric oversized gas guzzler, and use it to push my car fast enough to start it. I pointed out that because the VW had an automatic transmission, it needed to be pushed at least 30mph for it to start. She said "fine!", hopped into her car and drove off. I sat there fuming and wondering what she could be doing. A minute passed by and when I saw her in the rear-view mirror coming at me at about 40 mph, and I suddenly realized that I should have been a bit clearer with my directions...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Needing some clothes cleaned in a hurry, a man searched this small Georgia town in which he was visiting until he found a sign which read: "Cleaning and Pressing, 24-Hour Service." After explaining his needs, he said, "I''ll be back for my suit tomorrow." "Won''t be ready til Saturday," replied the proprietor. "But I thought you had 24-hour service," the customer protested. "We do, son," the proprietor said reproachfully. "But we only work eight hours a day. Today''s Thursday - eight hours today, eight hours Friday, eight on Saturday. That''s 24-hour service."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob was talking to Ted, an old friend. Bob: My wife drives like lightning! Ted: She drives fast? Bob: No, She hits trees!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Who''s idea was it to put "s" in the word "Lisp"? 2. Trust in God, but keep your car locked. 3. They say that swimming is good for your figure. If so, what happened to whales?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) If it rings, put it on hold. 2) If it clanks, call the repairman. 3) If it whistles, ignore it. 4) If it''s a friend, take a break. 5) If it''s the boss, look busy. 6) If it talks, take notes. 7) If it''s handwritten, type it. 8) If it''s typed, copy it. 9) If it''s copied, file it. 10) If it''s Friday, forget it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please Don''t Hurt Me by I. Bruce Easily "Life Through the Eyes of a Drunk" by Al Coholic "Thirty yards to the outhouse" by Will E. Makeit (illustrated by Betty Wont) "The Proper Use of Sunscreens" by Justin Casey Burns "How To Cure Scratching" by Ivan Awfulich "Discount Alternatives" by Robin Stuff', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman lived on a small farm in Canada, just yards away from the North Dakota border. Their land had been the subject of a minor dispute between the United States and Canada for years. The widowed woman lived on the farm with her son and three grandchildren. One day, her son came into her room holding a letter. "I just got some news, Mom," he said. "The government has come to an agreement with the people in North Dakota. They''ve decided that our land is really part of the United States. We have the right to approve or disapprove of the agreement. What do you think?" "What do I think?" his mother said. "Sign it! Call them right now and tell them we accept! I don''t think I can stand another Canadian winter!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a blond teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they were appalled by his appearance: leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos and a pierced nose. Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. "Dear," said the mother diplomatically, "he doesn''t seem very nice." "Oh please, Mom," replied the daughter, "if he wasn''t nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Although cats are rather delicate creatures, and they are subject to a good many ailments, I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia. Dogs and cats instinctively know the exact moment their owners will wake up. Then they wake them 10 minutes sooner. Dogs shed, cats shred. No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does. I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am. People that hate cats will come back as dogs in their next life. We wonder why the dogs always drink out of our toilets, but look at it from their point of view: Why do humans keep peeing into their water bowls? Women and cats will do as they please... men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Outside of a dog, a book is probably man''s best friend. Inside of a dog, it''s too dark to read.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Save the whales, harpoon a fat chick!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a small town, an frightened man ran inside the local pub and shouted, "Does anyone here own a big black dog with a white collar?" But no one answered and he said, "Oh my God,I must have run over the Vicar!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 men sell their bodies to science, for an exsperiment on a new military weapon to scare enemy soldiers by turning them into the enemies idea of the most scary, repulsive idea possible temporarily. The first man has his wife looking at him, drinks the chemical, and turns into a half-fish half-octopus with fur. The second guy has his therapist looking at him, and turns into a giant bald hamster with a snake head. The third guy has his girlfriend looking at him, he drinks the chemical. Nothing happens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hubluza', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This story takes place in a very specific year. Somewhere in the future. A year after Bush leaves office. -------------------------------- Part 1. A Space mission Place: In a rocket in space. Notes: names such as Junior and Senior are just rankings on the shuttle. -------------------------------- Senior: WHAT ARE YOU DOING, JUNIOR? Junior: Getting a donut. Senior: Yeah, but look at which donut it is. Junior: Chocolate with colorful sprinkles. Senior: YEAH! ONLY SENIOR RANKINGS GET SPRINKLES! Junior: Yeah! Wadaya gonna do? Senior: DON''T MAKE ME HURT YOU! Piolot: Guys, we have a problem. Junior: What is it? Senior: Shut up, Junior, let a sopisticated Senior do this. What is the problem? Piolot: I see a comet coming for us. Senior: Sacrifice Junior. Medical: Leave him alone! Junior: Yeah! I have a name! Medical: I''m sorry, I never caught your name. Junior: For the seventh time it''s Wally!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Note: This joke only makes sense if you read Space Adventure Part I on this site. A complete set of the Adventures can be found in the FunnyStories Forum. ---------------------------------- I Wally will take it from here! Part 1. A Space Mission Point of View: Wally(Junior) Notes: I''ll tell the story. Anything in parenthesse is me talking to you, not what someone said. -------------------------------- Medical: Oh, sorry. Me: Whatever. Senior: HA HA the woman can''t remember!(Senior''s a meanie I mean Come On!) Me: SHUT UP! Pilot: Jake (that''s Senior''s name) it''s not her fault she can''t remember. She didn''t choose to be female*laughs*! Medical: Don''t make me hurt you! Jake: Settle down, baby! Medical: grrrr Pilot: Very funny WOMAN leave the important stuff to the men NURSE but I''ll see you in bed later BABY! Medical: MY NAME IS JENNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!(there were echoes you wouldn''t believe.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone in Winslow, Maine didn''t like Mr. Wood: In Memory of Beza Wood Departed this life Nov. 2, 1837 Aged 45 yrs. Here lies one Wood Enclosed in wood One Wood Within another. The outer wood Is very good: We cannot praise The other. On a grave from the 1880''s in Nantucket, Massachusetts: Under the sod and under the trees Lies the body of Jonathan Pease. He is not here, there''s only the pod: Pease shelled out and went to God. The grave of Ellen Shannon in Girard, Pennsylvania is almost a consumer tip: Who was fatally burned March 21, 1870 by the explosion of a lamp filled with "R.E. Danforth''s Non-Explosive Burning Fluid" Oops! Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York: Born 1903 - Died 1942 Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the car was on the way down. It was. In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery: Here lies an Atheist All dressed up And no place to go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady lost her handbag during a day of shopping. It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her. Looking in her purse, she commented, "Hmmm.... That''s funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are twenty singles." The boy replied, "That''s right, lady. The last time I found a lady''s purse, she didn''t have change for a reward."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Float like a butterfly Sting like a bee I slept with yo momma Now it burns when I pee !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do chicken coops have two doors? Because if it had four doors it''d be a chicken sedan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you tell the truth, you don''t have to remember everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On opening his new store, a man received a bouquet of flowers. He became dismayed on reading the enclosed card, which expressed "Deepest Sympathy". While puzzling over the message, his telephone rang. It was the florist, apologizing for having sent the wrong card. "Oh, it''s all right," said the storekeeper. "I''m a businessman and I understand how these things can happen." "But," added the florist, "I accidentally sent your card to a funeral party." "Well, what did it say?" ask the storekeeper. "''Congratulations on your new location''," was the reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Vice President and his best friends were out hunting birds. People in the office knew that the best friend had some dirt on the vice president. When the vice president came back from hunting, the guy that owned the hunting place asked, "Where''s your friend?" The Vice President started to shake and said, "Oh he''s still hunting. I have my animals in this gym bag here." "O.k." A week later he came back alone. Then when he got to the car the next day a police man was writing a parking ticket. The officer said, "Sorry, sir, but I have to write you a ticket," and glanced at his police partner in his police car. Then the Vice President said, "Ok, let me just unlock the car and I''ll be on my way." Then when he clicked the trunk opener by accident, the trunk popped, and there was his best friend dead in the trunk and he said, "Oops ..." This shows how stupid some politicans can be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you get free tickets to a concert fast? A: Bring a gun to the box-office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Order a cheese burger with no cheese. 2. Ask if they would like to buy some soap. 3. Sing "I think your tractor''s sexy" 4. If you''re in a drive-through, say, "Man, I think you''re ugly." 5. Keep changing your order for over an hour. 6. When you pull up to the window, try to make it look like your window won''t go down. 7. Ask how much it would be to be in the restaurant while in the drive through. 8. Have a Chinese accent and order a soda but not a certain kind and say, "No, no Dr. Pepper he no certified doctor." 9. In the drive through say, "I''m holding Ronald McDonald hostage. For his release I want 3 big macs and a sonic toy." 10. If you''re at a life insurance place, order a big mac.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is a pencil not a pencil? When it''s on a Pentagon shopping list - then it''s a "portable hand-held communications inscriber", says a Republican senator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('William P. Holcomb''s job is to supervise the tracking down of Houston, Texas parking ticket violators. It was revealed that he himself had 375 unpaid tickets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bunch of men are in a locker room at the gym, just out from the steam room. One man''s phone rings, he answers it. The conversation between him and his girlfriend is as follows: "Hey honey!" "hey..." "I love ya!" "When are you gonna be home to feed us?" "Fuck ya''all! I hate you! The kids can starve!" "I''ve been loyal to you and this is what I get?!" "Go fuck a cow!" "I never wanna see your face again!" "Yours neither!" The man hangs up, laughing. "So, who''s phone is this anyway?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock! Who''s there? Ya. Ya who? What are you getting so excited about?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a video game freak if ... You hire a babysitter to watch your video games. When you go swimming you put your nintendo D.S. in the glove box so no one will try to commit a felony and try to steal it. You cry when your data gets deleted. When you lose a disc you blame everyone you can so you can be in denial. You have every system since the pong game. You know who and when created all of your games. You are eaisly entertained when you hear that the nintendo stock market raises. You talk to your friends for two hours discussing which is better: Age of mythology or Age of Empires, only to come to the conclusion that you''re eating pizza tonight to discuss it deeper. When you get on to someone elses computer you refer to yourself as a "hacker." You pray that to God that there''s no power outage in the next 3 days because you have to do some "light" gaming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now I lay me down to sleep; If I die before I wake, Please somebody; step on the BRAKE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Josh was never the most gifted child, but for this he couldn''t really be blamed. His mother, Maria, was no better than him. However, the singular talent that he possessed was an odd one: He could memorize everything he ate. His mother didn''t see this as satisfactory, but she decided to put his talent to good use; how you ask? Simply by writing, "Brilliant! Be brilliant!" on his lunch bag!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t worry, you aren''t fat. You''re only "fluffy"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 1 RE: Christmas Party I''m happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We''ll have a small band playing traditional carols - feel free to sing along. And don''t be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00pm. Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone''s pockets. This gathering is only for employees! A special announcement will be made by our CEO at that time! Merry Christmas to you and your family. Patty', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(To understand this joke you should read the Wocka joke entitled: December 1st. Enjoy.) FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 2nd RE: Holiday Party In no way was yesterday''s memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on we''re calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians or those still celebrating Reconciliation Day. There will be no Christmas tree present. No Christmas carols sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment. Happy now? Happy Holidays to you and your families. Patty (Continuation Wocka Joke entitled: December 3rd.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(To fully enjoy this joke, please read the Wocka jokes entittled: December 1st December 2nd Enjoy!) FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 3rd RE: Holiday Party Regarding the note I received from a member of "Alcoholics Anonymous" requesting a non-drinking table - you didn''t sign your name. I''m happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only", you wouldn''t be anonymous anymore. How am I supposed to handle this? Forget about the gifts exchange. No gift exchangements are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and executives believe $10.00 is a little chintzy. NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED!!! Patty (Continuation Wocka joke: December 7th.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(To understand this joke, you should read the Wocka jokes: December 1st. December 2nd. December 3rd. December 7th. Enjoy!) FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 10th RE: The Holiday Party Vegetarians? I''ve had it with you people! We''re going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not. So you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you''ll get your salad bar (including organic tomatoes). But you know, tomatoes have feelings too. They scream when you slice them. I''ve heard them scream. I''m hearing them scream right NOW! I hope you all have a rotten holiday! The Bitch from HELL! (Continuation joke on Wocka: December 14th.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FROM: Joan Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 14 RE: Patty Lewis and Holiday Party I''m sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery and I''ll continue to forward your cards to her. In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay. Happy Holidays!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pointer + Setter = Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet. Kerry Blue Terrier + Skye Terrier = Blue Skye, a dog for visionaries. Great Pyrenees + Dachshund = Pyradachs, a puzzling breed. Pekinese + Lhasa Apso = Peekasso, an abstract dog. Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel = Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle. Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever = Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists everywhere. Newfoundland + Basset Hound = Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors. Terrier + Bulldog = Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes. Malamute + Pointer = Moot Point, a dog that....oh, well, it doesn''t matter anyway. Collie + Malamute = Commute, a dog that travels to work. Deerhound + Terrier = Derriere, a dog that''s true to the end. Bull Terrier + Shih Tzu = Bullshitz, a gregarious but unreliable breed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING: if your answer "yes" to any of these questions then you know that you are weird and you believe too much in dragons. Ocasionally when you see a bird do you find yourself saying "O merlin hand me my mighty sword so I can slay this foul dragon"? Do you find yourself trying to rob a bank with a bow and arrow? Do you have any "magic staffs" lying around? Do you search for dragon eggs for at least 1 hour every day? Do you refer to your car as your "trusty steed"? Do your think your phone is a magical scrying device? When you call the cops, do you call them the saviors? Have you ever seen yourself writing in an ancient language(A.K.A. gibberish.)? When you kill something or when your refering to something dead do you call it "slain"? Whenever someone turns off the light do you scream "ahh magic, run and fear from the evil witch!"?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) The Code of Ethics for Lawyers. 2) Americans'' Guide to Etiquette. 3) The World Guide to Good American Beer. 4) Safe Places to Travel in the USA. 5) Bill Clinton: A Portrait of Integrity. 6) The Wit and Wisdom of Dan Quayle. 7) Consumer Marketing Ethics. 8) Career Opportunities for History Majors. 9) Great Women Drivers Of Today. 10) Beauty Secrets by Janet Reno. 11) Things I Love About Bill By: Hillary Clinton. 12) My Life''s Memories By: Ronald Reagan. 13) Things I Can''t Afford By: Bill Gates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Arab fathers are showing each other their family photos. One shows the other a picture and says "This is my oldest, he is a martyr. This is my second oldest, he is also a martyr." The other Arab father just sighs and says "Ahh, they blow up so quickly these days!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Fandersan family is a family with two parents and two kids. One day, Mr. Fandersan decided to bring home a state of the art moterhome. When he got home with the motorhome, he left it in the driveway. He then went to bed. But, the next day it was missing. On the driveway there was a note. It said, "We have stolen the motorhome." The parents were freaked out!! "This is a parent''s worst nightmare!! Our kids have stolen the car AND are home alone!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick Cheney had a problem. He was been sued for 200 million dollars. He asks everybody in the West Wing for advice. However, only President Bush has any good advice: " Why don''t you take them hunting?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma is so poor, when you asked for milk she said,"left or right?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many publishers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Three. One to screw it in and two more to hold down the editor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of the funniest things I''ve heard in a long time. I was watching T.V. and an advertisement for the show, "Monk" comes on. I don''t watch the show, but I love the commercials He says to a Dr: "I''m not even stalking you. At least not at the moment." I laughed for at least ten minutes. Even snorted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a lady that had a 3 year old son and one was coming on the way (she was pregnant). When the 3 year old asked his mother why her stomach was so big, she told him that it was just gas (she didn''t want to give him a confusing explanation). The day that the baby was born, the 3 year old came up to the baby and said, "Hey, Fart!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man in car, Went to bar. Feeling nifty, Doing fifty. Hit a car, Poor old soul. Doctor''s fee, CEMETARY!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are stuck in a room with absolutely no doors, no windows, and no escape. You are surrounded by 415 inch think metal walls. All you have is a mirror and a table. How do you get out? Well, you look into the mirror. You saw yourself, right? Now, use the saw to chop the table in half. To halves make a whole, so jump through the hole. Then yell at the top of your lungs until your voice is hoarse, then jump on the horse and ride away! =)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. They don''t sell tickets, they sell chances. 2. All the insurance machines in the terminal are sold out. 3. Before the flight, the passengers get together and elect a pilot. 4. If you kiss the wing for luck before boarding, it kisses you back. 5. You cannot board the plane unless you have the exact change. 6. Before you took off, the stewardess tells you to fasten your Velcro. 7. The Captain asks all the passengers to chip in a little for gas. 8. When they pull the steps away, the plane starts rocking. 9. The Captain yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway. 10. You ask the Captain how often their planes crash and he sez, "Just once." 11. No movie. Don''t need one. 12. Your life keeps flashing before your eyes. 13. You see a man with a gun, but he''s demanding to be let off the plane. 14. All the planes have both a bathroom and a chapel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did one chart say to the other? A: "My! You''re awfully graphic!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some small ads that didn''t quite come out right on paper - For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex. For Sale - Eight puppies from a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Hussy. Great Dames for sale. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. 2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7 wks old, Perfect markings, 555-1234. Leave mess. Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did they mean these ads to read as they do? Man, honest. Will take anything. Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References required. Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary. Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink. 3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred. Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included. Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory. Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night. Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Indian chief introduced his wife to a newspaper reporter; "This is Three Horse." "That''s a picturesque name," said the reporter. "Does it have deep symbolism?" "Yes," the chief replied. "Nag, nag, nag!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is soooo poor that her front and back door are on the same hinge!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there? Idunnap. Idunnap who? Well, you best get to the toilet then! (For those of you who don''t understand you''re meant to say, "i done a poo!")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aren''t you tired of those stupid, mushy greeting cards down at the card store? Here''s what a real friend would send to another... Dear friend, When you are sad, I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad... When you are blue, I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you... When you smile, I''ll know you finally got laid... When you are scared, I''ll will rag about it every chance I get... When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whinin''... When you are confuse, I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass... When you are sick, stay away from me until you''re well again. I don''t want whatever you have... When you fall, I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass... Sincerely, Your friend', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While reading a newspaper, Morty came across an article about a beautiful actress marrying a football player who was not noted for his IQ. "I''ll never understand," he said to his wife, "Why do the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives." His wife replied, "Why, thank you, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma smells so bad, when she went into the enchanted forest, all the skunks commited suicide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re like school on Saturday... NO CLASS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about camping? It''s intense. (In tents!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer and his son live on a farm in the middle of Nowhere, USA. One day the farmboy says to his father, "I''m bored." His father replies, "What are you talking about? Farm life is great!" He then adds, "However, I will admit, it is a little slow though. Nothing much to do except count the bricks in the silo." To this the boy says, "11,827."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you catch a unique rabbit? You nique up on it! How do you catch a tame rabbit? The tame way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A licalottapus!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One lesbian said to the other, "I''ll just be Frank with you," ...and the other said, "Ok, you be Frank today and I''ll be Frank tommorrow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two Chinese queers? Two can chew!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this blonde who had taken up golf for a long time. When she was ready to play, the 1st round she came back in 20 minutes and told the pro she was stung by a bee. He asked where. She said, "Between the first hole and the second hole." He said, "Sounds like your stance is too wide."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you left him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, at lunch at an elementary school, the cafeteria was serving swiss cheese. A little girl received her meal and was disgusted by it. "Miss lunch lady," she said at the end of the line, "I don''t like the holes in my cheese." "That''s okay," she said. "Just eat around them and leave them on your plate."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three guys at an award ceremony for their school: a not-so-smart one, an average one, and a smart one. The not-so-smart one proudly boasts, "I''m going to receive an award today!" The average one was a bit skeptical about this and asks, "What kind of award will that be?" Before the not-so-smart on was able to reply, the smart one said, "The Most Improved Award."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife check into a hotel. The husband wants to have a drink at the bar, but his wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to their room to rest. She lies down on the bed... just then, and elevated train passes by very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she''s thrown out of the bed. Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down once more. Again a train shakes the room so violently, she''s pitched to the floor. Exasperated, she calls the front desk, asks for the manager. The manager says he''ll be right up. The manager is skeptical but the wife insists the story is true. "Look... lie here on the bed -- you''ll be thrown right to the floor!" So he lies down next to the wife. Just then the husband walks in. "What," he says, "are you doing here!?!" The manager calmly replies, "Would you believe I''m waiting for a train?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife are getting ready to go to bed. The husband says, "I thought we''d have sex tonight." The wife replies, "No, I''m too tired tonight." The husband says, "Is that your final answer?" The wife says, "Yes, it is, thank you." The husband says, "OK, then, I''d like to phone a friend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyer Says Client is Not That Guilty (Just how guilty was he?) Legislator Wants Tougher Death Penalty (I say, give it to him.) Man Jumps Off Bridge. Neither Jumper Nor Body Found (What?) After Detour to California Shuttle Returns to Earth (Well, this confirms what many of us have suspected about California.) Woman Improving After Fatal Crash (Modern science is amazing, isn''t it?)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beer... it''s the cause and solution to all men''s problems!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the patron saint of playgrounds? St. Francis of a see-saw!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either. The money is always greener in the other guy''s wallet. When money talks, no one criticizes its accent. I love my cat. My cat does not care. My bank account needs month-to-month resuscitation. Everyone needs to believe in something. I believe in chocolate. Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. Don''t worry about the world ending today. It''s already tomorrow in Australia. What if the Hokey Pokey is really what it''s all about? Does it scare you that you are looking for wisdom from a T-shirt? A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. Jesus loves you, but I think you''re a jerk. Thousands of years ago, cats were worshiped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this. Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change ready.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth. If I save time, when do I get it back? What was the best thing before sliced bread? Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. Experience is something you don''t get until just after you need it. The gene pool could use a little chlorine. I may be fat, but you are ugly and I can lose weight. I''m really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me. It''s lonely at the top, but you eat better. Smile. It''s the second best thing you can do with your lips. If the left side of the brain controls the right hand, then only left-handed people are in their right mind. Why does your nose run and your feet smell? Does fuzzy logic tickle? All men are animals; some just make better pets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional. God put me on earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now, I am so far behind I will live forever. Life is too short. Don''t be a jerk. Friends are the chocolate chips in the cookies of life. If life is like a bowl of cherries, then I''m living in the pits! Good judgment comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment. If they don''t have chocolate in heaven, I''m not going. Germs attack people where they are weakest. This explains the number of head colds. It''s not just the ups and downs that make life difficult. It''s the jerks. I don''t know what I want, but I do know I don''t have it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly and for the same reason. The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it limits. Drive carefully. It''s not only cars that can be recalled by their maker. Go ahead and take risks. Just be sure that everything will turn out OK. STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS. I don''t work here. I''m a consultant. When in doubt, tell the truth. (Mark Twain) Constant change is here to stay. Don''t let the past hold you back. You''re missing today''s good stuff! Enthusiasm is contagious. Start an epidemic! Education is expensive, but ignorance is more so.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During work Mike and John are chatting, Mike: "I''ve been taking night courses for five months now, and I have an exam next week." John: "Oh!" Mike: "For example, do you know who Graham Bell is?" John: "No." Mike: "He is the inventor of the phone in 1876. If you take night courses you would know this." The next day the same discussiontook place: Mike: "Do you know who Alexander Dumas is?" John: "No." Mike: "He is the author of "The 3 Musketeers". If you took night courses you would know this." The next day, once again: Mike: "And do you know who Jean Jacques Rousseau is?" John: "No." Mike: "He''s the author of "Confessions", if you took night courses you would know this." Now this time John got irritated and said, "And do you know who Steven Turner is?" Mike: "No." John: "He is the guy sleeping with your wife! If you stopped night duties you would know this!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the one thing you get at a wedding and cannot give back no matter how much you despise and hate it? IN-LAWS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius say... ~He who value skin does not wash cat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are four people on a plane. a guy from england, a guy from france, a guy from texas, and a guy from mexico, all of a sudden the plane starts falling out of the sky. The pilot says "We a losing altitude we need to get rid of some weight. So they throw everything out of the plane, but its still falling. So the english guy says" for the queen" and jumps out, the french guy says" vi va la france" and jumps out. The texan say "for the alamo" he grabs the mexican and throws him out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping. (why wait that long) 2) Thou shall not do drugs. (alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.) 3) Thou shall not steal from K-Mart. (Walmart has a bigger selection) 4) Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism. (destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this) 5) Thou shall not steal from your parents. (everyone knows grandma has more money) 6) Thou shall not get into fights. (Cat fight anyhow...just start them.) 7) Thou shall not skip class. (just take the whole day off) 8) Thou shall not strip in class. (Hooters pays more) 9) Thou shall not think about having sex. (like Nike says, "just do it") 10) Thou shall not help old ladies across the street. (just leave''m in the middle)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between an intelligent man and a UFO? A: I don''t know, I''ve never seen either. Q: What are two reasons why men don''t mind their own business? A: (1)No mind (2)No business', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Tim are out one day test driving cars. They happen to pull up to the same stop light side by side. Bill yells out his window, "HEY TIM, Corvette?" Tim yells back "YUP THIS IS A CORVETTE" Tim yells again "HEY BILL, Audi?" Bill jumps out of his car pulls up his shirt, points to his belly button and says, "Nope! I got an INNY!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This summer, I went on a trip to Houston. I needed to go really badly, so I stopped behind a tree. A minute later, I darted out being chased by a hungry squirrel. He wanted some nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('IBM and IBC combine to create the perfect computer for financial management. Here''s the headline on the weekly paper. IBM: Do You?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Billy why are you late? Billy: Because the sign said "Children Slow"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Answer: Elephino (Hell-if-I-know)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? A vampire only sucks blood at night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A retiree was given a set of golf clubs by his co-workers. Thinking he''d try the game, he asked the local pro for lessons, explaining that he knew nothing whatever of the game. The pro showed him the stance and swing, then said, "Just hit the ball toward the flag on the first green." The novice teed up and smacked the ball straight down the fairway and onto the green, where it stopped inches from the hole. "Now what?" the fellow asked the speechless pro. "Uh... you''re supposed to hit the ball into the cup," the pro finally said, after he was able to speak again. The retiree replied, "Oh great! NOW you tell me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Miss Jones had been giving her second-grade students a lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron. Now it was question time, and she asked, "My name begins with the letter ''M'' and I pick up things. What am I?" A little boy on the front row proudly said, "You''re a mother!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I seen a commercial on T.V for a pill that helps with ED (erectile deficency). As one of the side effects the announcer said "If you experience an erection for longer than four hours call your doctor." I thought call my doctor?? If I have an erection for more than four hours I am calling Ripley''s Believe it or Not!!.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so hairy that I thought she had herself in a headlock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Nunya! Nunya who? Nunya Damn Business!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life isn''t fair. I went to my boss with a note from my doctor stating that I have multiple personalities. Now I do three different jobs and still only get one paycheck!!.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come you never hear anything about the 10th reindeer, Olive? Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names." What''s the most popular wine at Christmas? "I don''t like sprouts"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did you learn in school today? Not enough, apparently. I have to go back tomorrow!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t witches wear panties? To get a better grip on their broom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Glow in the dark sunglasses A book on how to read A dictionary index Watermelon seed sorter Zero proof alcohol Reusable ice cubes See through toilet tissue Skinless bananas Do it yourself roadmap', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wilma and her husband Barney go to church every Sunday, and during the service Barney falls asleep. One afternoon Wilma goes to the priest and asks what she can do. The priest hands her a needle and tells her to prick him with it every time he falls asleep. The next week at church Barney falls asleep while the priest is talking and when the priest asks, "Who is our savior?" Wilma pokes him with the needle, and he yells out "JESUS!" Soon after that he goes back to sleep. The next question the priest asks is, "Who is Jesus''s Father?" Wilma pokes him with the needle and Barney yells out "GOD!" and goes back to sleep. The last question the priest asks is, "What did Eve say to Adam after he impregnated her for the 99th time?" Wilma pricks him with the needle again and he yells, "IF YOU POKE THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME I''LL SNAP IT IN HALF AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand pulling a male buffalo with the other. He says to the waiter, "Want coffee." The waiter says, "Sure, Chief, coming right up." He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee The Indian drinks the coffee down in one gulp, turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere, then just walks out. The next morning the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand pulling another male buffalo with the other. He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter, "Want coffee." The waiter says, "Whoa, Tonto! We''re still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. What was all that about, anyway?" The Indian smiles and proudly says, "Training for position in United States Congress: Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave mess for others to clean up, disappear for rest of day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday a cowboy went to church. When he entered, he saw that he and the preacher were the only ones present. The preacher asked the cowboy if he wanted him to go ahead and preach. The cowboy said, "I''m not too smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I''d feed him." So the minister began his sermon. One hour passed, then two hours, then two-and-a-half hours. The preacher finally finished and came down to ask the cowboy how he had liked the sermon. The cowboy answered slowly, "Well, I''m not too smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I sure wouldn''t feed him all the hay."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, looking at the old pages as he turned them. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed in between the pages. "Momma, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. With astonishment, he claimed: "I think it''s Adam''s suit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pious man, who had reached the age of 105, suddenly stopped going to synagogue. Alarmed by the old fellow''s absence after so many years of faithful attendance, the rabbi went to see him. He found him in excellent health, so the rabbi asked; "How come after all these years we don''t see you at services any more?" The old man lowered his voice. "I''ll tell you, Rabbi," he whispered. "When I got to be 90, I expected God to take me any day. But then I got to be 95, then 100, then 105, so I figured that God is very busy and must''ve forgotten about me, and I don''t want to remind Him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge scowled down at a repeat offender before him. "Haven''t I seen you in here many times already? And didn''t I tell you that I never wanted to see you in here again?" "Yes, Your Honor," the defendant replied. "That''s exactly what I told the police officer, but he insisted I come in anyway!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what your problem is? Your brain is too tense... too tense the size of everybody else''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gloria the blonde once heard that milk baths would make you beautiful. She left a note for her milkman Alan to leave 15 gallons of milk. When Alan read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the door to clarify the order. Gloria came to the door, and Alan said, "I found your note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 15 gallons or 1.5 gallons?" Gloria said, "I want 15 gallons. I''m going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath." Alan asked, "Oh, alright, would you like it pasteurized?" Gloria replied, "No, just up to my waist."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were some backwoods hillbillies living across the river from each other, who feuded constantly. John hated Clarence with a passion and never passed up a chance to throw rocks across the river at Clarence. This went on for years until one day the Corps of Engineers came to build a bridge across that river. John was elated; he told his wife that finally he was going to get the chance to cross over and whip Clarence. He left the house and returned in a matter of minutes. His wife asked what was wrong, didn''t he intend to go over the bridge and whip Clarence? He replied that he never had really seen Clarence up close and didn''t realize his size until he started over the bridge and saw the sign: "CLEARANCE 8 FT 3 IN"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... On stag night, you take a real deer. You use a 55 Chevy as a guest house. Your back porch is bigger than your house. There is more oil in your cap than in your car. You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture. A full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat. An expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall. You think Old Yeller is a movie about your brother''s tooth. You watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips. Your secret family recipe is illegal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma''s so poor, she can''t afford to go on welfare. Yo mamma''s so poor, she got thrown out of a homeless shelter. Yo mamma''s so poor, she tried to use food stamps on a gumball machine. Yo mamma''s so poor, a burgler broke into her house and left her some money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you''re in a gay church? If half the congregation is kneeling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It happened one time that a very old lady, whose husband had died, took a walk in the woods. She came across a young man whose hormones were raging. The young man tripped the old lady and came on top of her; she screamed and was heard by a couple walking not too far from them, but by the time they arrived the young man was doing the thing. When the young couple tried to pull him off the old lady,the old lady said, "Let him go ahead and see what his intention is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun was walking in the convent when one of the priests noticed she was gaining a little weight. "Gaining a little weight are we sister Susan?" he asked. "No, Father. Just a little gas," Sister Susan explained. A month or so later the priest noticed that she had gained even more weight. "Gaining some weight are we Sister Susan?" he asked again. "Oh no, Father. Just a little gas," she replied again. A couple of months later the priest noticed Sister Susan pushing a baby carriage around the convent. He leaned over and looked in the carriage and said, "Cute little fart."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shortly after the 911 emergency number became available, an elderly and quite ill lady appeared in a hospital emergency room, having driven herself to the hospital and barely managing to stagger in from the parking lot. The horrified nurse said, "Why didn''t you call the 911 number and get an ambulance?" The lady said, "My phone doesn''t have an eleven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pub and sits down next to a man with a dog at his feet. "Does your dog bite?" "No." A few minutes later the dog takes a huge chunk out of his leg. "I thought you said your dog didn''t bite!" the man says indignantly. "That''s not my dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was set up by Google as a joke. Enjoy! Please do the following: 1. Open Google. 2. Type, "french military victories". 3. Click: I''m Feeling Lucky. 4. Enjoy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was set up by Google. Enjoy! Please do the following: 1. Open Google. 2. Type "failure". 3. Click: I''m Feeling Lucky. 4. Enjoy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was speeding down the highway, feeling secure in a gaggle of cars all traveling at the same speed. However, as they passed a speed trap, he got nailed with an infrared speed detector and was pulled over. The officer handed him the citation, received his signature and was about to walk away when the man asked, "Officer, I know I was speeding, but I don''t think it''s fair - there were plenty of other cars around me who were going just as fast, so why did *I* get the ticket?" "Ever go fishing?" the policeman suddenly asked the man. "Ummm, yeah..." the startled man replied. The officer grinned and added, "Ever catch *all* the fish?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? A. Slow down and use a lubricant. Q. What''s six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? A. Money. Q. What''s the difference between your wife and your job? A. After five years your job will still suck. Q. How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony? A. It''s not hard. Q. Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? A. The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts. Q: Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony? A. She is the one who can eat the last donut! Q: What''s the difference between a blimp and 365 blow jobs? A: One is a Goodyear, and the other is a great year! Q: Why do the men in Scotland wear kilts? A: Because the sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blonde and a brunette in a car. The brunette hears a siren behind them, so she asks the blonde if its lights are on. The blonde turns around and says "yes, no, yes, no....."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get if you drop a piano on the seventh dwarf? A: A diminished seventh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know why single women can''t fart? Because they don''t get assholes untill they get married.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Professionals built the Titanic. An amateur built the ark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and throws down a bet. 100 dollars to anyone who can do 100 pushups. A man disappears outside and returns minutes later. "I''ll take that bet" the man says, and collapses after 50 pushups. "I don''t get it", he says," I just did 150 outside!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was settling down to his after-dinner drink when he daughter climbs onto his lap. "Where does poo come from?" asks his inquisitive girl. The man knew these types of questions would come, and had given some thought to the answer he would give. "Well, sweetheart, you know the dinner you just ate? Well, our bodies keep the good parts, called nutrients, so our bones and muscles can grow strong. The rest passes out of our backsides, and that''s poo." After a shocked silence, the girl trembles through another question for her father... "Umm... so where does Tigger come from?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(This joke was copied from the "Fresh Price of Bel Air" show and are not my original jokes). 40 is the begining.... the begining of the end. 40 is the begining of life. Did I say life?... i meant gum disease!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All of his life Stosh had heard stories of an amazing family tradition. It seems that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all been able to walk on water on their 21st birthday. On that day, they''d walk across the lake to the boat club for their first legal drink. So when Stosh''s 21st birthday came around, he and his pal Stan took a boat out to the middle of the lake. Stosh stepped out of the boat and nearly drowned! Stan just managed to pull him to safety. Furious and confused, Stosh went to see his grandmother. "Grandma, it''s my 21st birthday, so why can''t I walk across the lake like my father, his father, and his father before him?" Granny looked into Stosh''s eyes and said, "Because, you dumb ass, your father, grandfather and great grandfather were born in January, but you were born in July."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Baptist preacher was seated next to a cowboy on a flight to Texas. After the plane took off, the cowboy asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the preacher if he would like a drink. Appalled, the preacher replied, "I''d rather be tied up and taken advantaged of by women of ill-repute than to let liquor touch my lips." The cowboy then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me, too. I didn''t know we had a choice...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You were speaking much too long on the phone just now, Miss Ponsonby, said Mr.Jones. "But it was a business call, Mr. Jones." "Well, please don''t address our clients as ''sweetikins''in the future."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom had just placed some flypaper out when my little cousin wandered in. She was fascinated watching the flies get caught. Finally, my mom asked, "Molly, don''t you have flies in your house?" "Yeah, we have flies. We just don''t have anything for them to sit on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Smart Is Your Right Foot? This is so funny that it will boggle your mind, and you will keep trying it at least 50 more times to see if you can outsmart your foot - but you can''t! 1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles with it. 2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.. Your foot will change direction! I told you so.. And there is nothing you can do about it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in St. Louis, but by the time police arrived on the scene, fourteen pedestrians had boarded the bus and had begun to complain of whiplash injuries and back pain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend of mine and his family were taking a trip to the mall. On the way, their 18 month old son had a massive blow out poopy diaper. In the mall parking lot, the diaper was changed and put in a Dillard''s bag. Embarrassed by the incredibly bad smell, the couple decided to leave the bag on the hood of the car to be thrown in a dumpster as opposed to a mall trash can. A couple of hours later when the family was returning to the car, they saw an old, beat up pick-up stop at their car. A young man jumped out and hurriedly threw the Dillard''s bag into the cab. He got back in and the pick up sped off with what he thought was a mighty haul.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man worked hard all day digging the garden and felt very stiff and sore. His wife fluttered about him, pleased with the amount of work he had done and anxious to get him to do some more. "Have a nice soak in the bath and I''ll bring you a drink," she suggested smiling. "Good idea," says the husband looking forward to being waited on. He''s in the bath when she comes in with a nice glass of Scotch which he accepts happily. "If there''s anything else you''d like just call," says the wife as she leaves the bathroom. When she got halfway along the landing the husband relaxes completely and lets off an enormous long fart in the bath. A few minutes later, despite it being a very warm Summer''s evening, the wife comes in with a fluffy bed warmer "What the heck is that for?" asks the husband snappily. "Oh Darling," says the wife, flustered, "I thought I heard you say, "Whataboutahottawaterbottle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did God create men? Because vibrators can''t mow the lawn. Madonna All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others. Henry Youngman To attract men, I wear a perfume called ''New Car Interior''. Rita Rudner This guy says, ''I''m perfect for you, because I''m a cross between a macho and a sensitive man.'' I said, ''Oh, a gay trucker?'' Judy Tenuta Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself -- like, for instance, he can''t find any clean socks. Jean Kerr Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we''ve always had: work or prison. Tim Allen I love men, even though they''re lying, cheating scumbags. Gwyneth Paltrow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair, drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. The neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged that she came over and shouted at me, "You should be hung!" I slowly took a long drink from my can of Old Milwaukee Light, wiped the cold foam from my lips, lifted my darkened Oakley sunglasses and looked at this nosy ass neighbor and replied, "I am. That''s why she cuts the grass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man goes into the Social Security Office and fills out an application. Too old to have a birth certificate, he is asked to prove he is old enough. He opens his shirt and shows them the gray hair on his chest and they accept that as proof. He goes home to his wife, shows her the check, and explains to her what has happened. She replies, "Well, get back down there, pull down your pants, and see if you can get disability!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You momma so stupid, when I asked her,"Why she was yelling into an envelope."She said "She was trying to send voice mail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat and stupid, when her doctor told her to go on a seafood diet, she says OK, I see food, I eat it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she entered a fat contest she won 1st, 2nd, and 3rd prizes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cute volcano? Lava-ble!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There''s a knob called ''brightness'' but it doesn''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two groups of people. The first one was of a taxi driver who was driving at a high speed that all the passengers knelt and prayed. The second was of a priest who was preaching but boring the people to the extent that they started walking out. WHO BROUGHT PEOPLE CLOSER TO GOD? The taxi-driver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In 1976, the Pentagon returned 50 security doors because of a design flaw. The doors, which cost $1,500.00 each, had titanium locks and handles, and a 0.0001" clearance at all edges. The problem was discovered when an angry secretary threw her coffee cup at one of the doors. It went right through the 1/16 inch wood veneer. It was also discovered that if you pulled on the handle, it would come off in your hand. In 1948, Mayor Jose Hussong, of Baja California, Mexico had a section of highway named after him by the people of his city. On the day it was to be dedicated, a group of officials waited for him to arrive. After they had waited for 2 hours, one of the officials went to the mayor''s estate. He was informed that the mayor had been dead for 2 years. The official returned to the dedication and announced that the Mayor was unable to attend due to health problems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not flunk; He keepeth me from lying down when I should be studying. He leadeth me beside the water cooler for a study break; He restoreth my faith in study guides. He leads me to better study habits For my grades sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of borderline grades, I will not have a nervous breakdown; For thou art with me. My prayers and my friends, they comfort me. Thou givest me answers in moments of blankness; Thou anointest my head with understanding. My test paper runneth over with questions I recognize. Surely passing grades and flying colors shall follow me All the days of my examinations, And I shall not have to dwell in this university forever, Amen!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things You Don''t Want to Hear When Regaining Consciousness "I don''t know what it is, but hurry up and pack it in ice." "Hey Charlie, unzip the bag on that one, he''s still moving." "Blink once for ''yes''." "What do you mean we have the wrong patient?" "Why is there a tag on his toe?" "Do you think he can hear us?" "I didn''t even know a human could bend that way." "I''m sorry, we must not have used enough anasthesia." "Just relax now. We''ll be done in a jiffy." "Hold the patient still, we''ve almost pried it open." "Did the doctor know he would look like that afterwards?" "Of course I''ve performed this operation before, Nurse!" "Nurse, make sure you''re getting all this down." "It''ll make a great ''ER'' script."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man awoke in a hospital bed after a complicated operation, and found that the curtains were drawn around him. "Why are the curtains closed?" he said. "Is it night?" A nurse replied, "No, it''s just that there is a fire across the street, and we didn''t want you waking up and thinking that the operation was unsuccessful."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ON MODERNISM How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools. THOUGHTS ON METAPHYSICS Deja Vu: The feeling that somehow, somewhere, you''ve been kicked in the head like this before. ON DEEP THOUGHTS A day without sunshine is like night. ON PARADOX AND RETURN POLICIES There is a CD out entitled "The Worst of Jefferson Airplane". If you buy this, take it home, play it, and enjoy it, should you take it back and demand a refund? ON HIGHER EDUCATION College is a fountain of knowledge... and the students are there to drink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent On-line poll 38,562 men across the UK were asked to identify a woman''s ultimate fantasy. 98.8% of the respondents said that a woman''s ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once. While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other is cleaning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After the man received the full treatment - shave, shampoo, manicure, haircut, etc. - he placed the boy in the chair. "I''m goin'' to buy a green tie to wear for the parade," he said. "I''ll be back in a few minutes." When the boy''s haircut was completed and the man still hadn''t returned, the barber said, "Looks like your daddy''s forgotten all about you." "That wasn''t my daddy," said the boy. "He just walked up, took me by the hand and said, ''Come on, son, we''re gonna get a free haircut!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, did you hear about the... Paper company that folded? Brake company on the skids? Bra manufacturers that went bust? Surgeon who was forced to take a cut in his salary? Cigarette company that went up in smoke? Baker who was short of dough? Refrigerator manufacturer that had its assets frozen? Corset firm that felt the squeeze? Upholsterers that couldn''t cover their costs? Adhesive tape company that got into a sticky situation? Tennis ball manufacturer that ended up in court? Downfall of the bungee suppliers? The train company that went off the rails? The ship building company that sunk? The dental practice that was rotten to its roots?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The little cowboy, Shorty, was leaving the bar to get on his horse for the ride back to the ranch, when he noted that someone had painted his horse''s balls blue. Totally pissed, he went back into the bar and shouted, "Who''s the dirty son of a bitch that painted my horse''s balls blue?!" A big burly guy stood up and said, "I did. Got a problem with that?" "None," says Shorty, "just wanted to let you know he was dry and ready for the 2nd coat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my three-year-old son opened a birthday gift from his grandmother, he discovered a water pistol. He squealed with delight and headed for the nearest sink. I was not so pleased. I turned to Mom and said, "I''m surprised at you. Don''t you remember how we used to drive you crazy with water guns?" Mom smiled and then replied....."I remember."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a golfer whose drive landed on an anthill. Rather than move the ball, he decided to hit it where it lay. He gave a mighty swing. Clouds of dirt and sand and ants exploded from the spot, everything but the golf ball. It sat in the same spot. So he lined up and tried another shot. Clouds of dirt and sand and ants went flying again. The golf ball didn''t even wiggle. Two ants survived. One dazed ant said to the other, "Whoa! What are we going to do?" Said the other ant: "I don''t know about you, but I''m going to get on the ball."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Deciding to take a day off from his important job, a young hot-shot broker went back to visit some of his professors at his old school. Entering the school, he saw a dog attacking a small child. He quickly jumped on the dog and strangled it. The next day, the local paper reported the story with the headline "Valiant Student Saves Boy From Fearsome Dog." The broker called the editor of the paper and strongly suggested that a correction be issued, pointing out that he was no longer a student, but a successful Wall Street broker. The following day, the paper issued a correction, with a headline that read, "Pompous Stock Broker Kills School Mascot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly man called 911 and said he thought his wife might be dead. Operator: "MIGHT be dead? Sir, can''t you tell if she is dead?" Man: "I''m not quite sure." Operator: "Well, what makes you THINK that she could be dead?" Man: "Well, the sex is the same, but the dishes are beginning to pile up in the sink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nice girl brings home her fiance to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells her father to find out about the young man. He invites the fiance to his study for a chat. "So, what are your plans?" the father asks the fiance. "I am a Biblical scholar," he replies. "A Biblical scholar. Admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in, as she''s accustomed to?" "I will study," the young man replies, "...and God will provide for us." "And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?" "I will concentrate on my studies, God will provide for us." "And children? How will you support children?" "Don''t worry, sir, God will provide." The conversation proceeds like this, and each time the father questions, the fiance insists that God will provide. Later, the mother asks, "So? How did it go?" "He has no job and no plans, but the good news is he thinks I''m God."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus and Saint Peter are golfing. St. Peter steps up to the tee on a par three and hits one long and straight. It reaches the green. Jesus is up next. He slices it. It heads over the fence into traffic on an adjacent street. Bounces off a truck, onto the roof of a nearby shack and into the rain gutter, down the drain spout and onto a lilly pad at the edge of a lake. A frog jumps up and snatches the ball in his mouth. An eagle swoops down, grabs the frog. As the eagle flies over the green, the frog croaks and drops the ball. It''s in the hole. Saint Peter looks at Jesus, exasperated. "Are you gonna play golf?" he asks "Or are you just gonna fuck around?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The farmer and his wife had worked hard, they scrimped and saved to send their son to college. As soon as he had enrolled, he started to grow a beard. Next he grew a large mustache and sideburns. Being pleased with his new hirsute adornment, he had his picture taken and sent it off to his parents. On the back of the photo he scrawled, "How do you like it? Don''t I look like a count?" Shortly after, the son received this terse note: "You idiot, it cost us a fortune to send you to college, and you can''t even spell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two fish. The first says: "We''re gonna swim 100 miles upstream, have sex, then die." The second says: "So we''re gonna swim 100 miles upstream, then die?" First fish: "Yup" Second: "Are we gonna have sex?" First : "Yup" Second: "Ok count me in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "Can someone tell me three kinds of triangles? Yes, Jimmy?" Jimmy: "OK, so there''s right, isosceles, and you, your husband, and the mailman." The class laughed. "OK, young man. Now you''re going straight to the principal." said the teacher. And the principal laughed too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do when you''re lonely on an Alaskan cruise? Answer: Go to the window and yell "whale"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one virus say to the other virus? Keep away from me, I think I''ve got penicillin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one earthquake say to another? Oops! My fault!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dickiedoo Disease: defined as the expansion of the adominal region of the human male to the point where it eliminates the view of the male''s private part from its possessor. Translated into a more commonly used phrase "His belly sticks out further than his Dickiedoo! Also know as Abdominalius Humongus and in some cases where the male appendage is not very large, this condition is known as Male Apparatus Non-existus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven." The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said. "You may pass through the Pearly Gates," Saint Peter said. The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They''re bells." Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the Pearly Gates." The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women''s underwear. St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?" The man replied, "They''re Carols."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the 12th day of Christmas my true love sent to me 12- Pack of Bud 11 Rasslin'' Tickets 10 tins of Copenhagen 9 Years Probation 8 Holey vests 7 Kissing Cousins 6 Cans of Spam 5 Hunting Hounds 4 Mudgrip tyres 3 Shot Gun Shells 2 more Gaps in Teeth And some parts to a Mustang GT', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smart-ass Answer #1 A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat ...she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub." Smart-ass Answer #2 A truck driver was driving along on! the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low bridge ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The blondes at the university were tired of not fitting in. They were tired of other students assuming they were just stupid bimbos. They wanted somewhere where they felt they belonged. So they pressured the administration to set up a new Department especially for them. The university agreed, and set up the Blonde Education Department. The blondes were ecstatic to have a department of their own where they could gather without being ridiculed. They felt they really belonged now. They wanted other students to see that they weren''t just stupid bimbos - after all, they now had their own department at the university. They now all proudly wear the official sweatshirt of the Blonde Education Department which sports the saying: "I belong in B.E.D."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Always remember you''re unique. Just like everyone else. 2. Good judgement comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgement. 3. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket. 4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. - Babe Ruth "Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn''t a lot of strokes when you consider the course." - Lee Trevino "I''m not saying my golf game went bad , but if I grew tomatoes, they''d come up sliced." - Lee Trevino "If you think it''s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball." - Jack Lemmon "After all these years, it''s still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye." - Chi Chi Rodriguez "Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf and you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf." - Jack Benny "Golf appeals to the child in us. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five." - John Updike', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Johnny saw his dad got caught on fire. Immeaditly he went to his mom saying, "Mom, mom hurry, dad''s on fire, and I brought the marshmellows!" Another day a lady came to the door asking for things for the old peoples fund. Johnny yelled from the doorway to his mom, "Hey mom, there''s this person asking for the old peoples fund, shall I give them grandma?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A retired US Marine was looking for a new job. He finally found one that appealed to his interests. At the interview, he was asked, "Do you have any military experience?" The Marine replied, "Why, yes! I''ve been in the Marines for a couple of years." "I see," said the interviewer, "any disabilities?" The Marine looked at him and replied shakily. "Well... In the Vietnam War I had a grenade go off between my legs, blowing off my testicles." The interviewer, quite shocked, said "All right, you''re hired. Please report to work on Monday at 10:00am." "Wait wait!" shouted the Marine, "When do the others start? I don''t want any special treatment just because of my disability." The interviewer replied, "Well... I''ll tell you the truth. Everyone normally comes at 7:00 in the morning, but nothing gets done until 10. All we do is sit around, scratching our nuts trying to figure out what to do."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man complaining to a friend: "I had it all - money, a beautiful house, a big car, the love of a beautiful woman ... then ... pow! ... it was all gone!" "What happened?" asked the friend. "Ahhhh ... my wife found out ..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My daughter was going over to the neighbor''s house to visit but didn''t want to miss a call from her boyfriend so she took the cordless phone with her. While at the neighbor''s she wanted to check back at home to see if her younger brother was okay. My daughter then picked up the neighbor''s phone and dialed our number. While waiting for someone to answer the phone at home, the phone she brought over with her began to ring. She immediately hung up the neighbor''s phone and answered our phone. There was no one there. She wanted to know who it was who called so she used our phone to call our house. The line was busy. Getting very frustrated she left the neighbor''s to go home and see who was on the phone. No one was on the phone. My daughter could not figure out what was going on until someone explained it to her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met. I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy. Mental backup in progress - Do not disturb! The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes. Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy. Boycott shampoo! Demand the REAL poo! Black holes are where God divided by zero. If you can''t read this, you''re illiterate. It''s a small world, but I wouldn''t want to paint it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bumper sticker of a proud parent read: MY SON WAS INMATE OF THE MONTH', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The young man entered the Ice Cream Palace and asked, "What kinds of ice cream do you have?" "Vanilla, chocolate, strawberry," the girl wheezed as she spoke, patted her chest and seemed unable to continue. "Do you have laryngitis?" the young man asked sympathetically. "Nope," she whispered, "just vanilla, chocolate and strawberry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a math trick so unbelievable that it will stump you. Personally I would like to know who came up with this and why that person is not running the country. I wonder what it means... 1. Grab a calculator. (You won''t be able to do this one in your head) 2. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT the area code) 3. Multiply by 80 4. Add 1 5. Multiply by 250 6. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number 7. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number again. 8. Subtract 250 9. Divide number by 2 Do you recognize the answer?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Italian Cop? Guinea Pig', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American, a Japanese and an Iraqi were walking together. The American put his hand near his mouth and started speaking; after he finished the Iraqi asked him what he was doing, and the American said, "We put microphones in our hands and speakers in our ears so that we can make phone calls without the need to carry a mobile phone." Then the Japanese started talking, and after he finished the Iraqi said to him, "You didn''t put your hand near your mouth, how did you speak?" The Japanese said, "We put the microphones in our teeth so that we can speak hands-free." Then the Iraqi picked up a paper from the ground and swallowed it, and both the American and the Japanese asked him about what he did, and he said, "I sent a fax."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American, a Frenchman and a Chinese went to try their echo; the American said, "Good morning," and the echo came back, "Good morninginginging." Then the Frenchman said, "Bon jour," and the echo came back "Bon jourjourjour." Then the Chinese said, "Chang chiong shang zhang hu," and the echo came back, "Whatwhatwhatwhat?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three people had been sentenced to be put in jail for ten years, and they asked each one of them to say one thing that he wants to have with him in the chamber. The first one said, "I want you to put 1 ton of steak with me," so they did and they locked the chamber; then the second one said, "I want a rack full with the best wines in the world," so they put it in his chamber and locked it; the third said, "I want 1000 packets of cigarettes," so they put it in the chamber and locked it. After the ten years are over, they unlocked the first chamber, and the man came out with big belly and said, "That was delicious." Then they unlocked the second chamber, and the man came out and he can barely stand and said, "Those were the best wines that I have ever tasted." When they opened the third chamber, the man came out and said, "Matches, please"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two robbers from Puerto Rico felt that the police were getting hot on their trail, so they decided to move far away to Montreal and continue their life of crime in the new city. Unfortunately they just did not quite understand winter. They were arrested the morning after their first break-in. The police just followed their footsteps in the snow from the store to their house...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she''d be Yoko Ono Bono. If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she''d be Dolly Dali. If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she''d be Bo Ho. If Ella Fitzgerald married Darth Vader, she''d be Ella Vader. If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she''d be Oprah Chopra. If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, he''d be Cat Doggy Dogg. If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she''d be Olivia Newton-John Newton John. If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she''d become Sondra Locke Ness Munster. If Bea Arthur married Sting, she''d be Bea Sting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where''s the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bush, Chirac and Saddam went to hell. Bush wanted to call the US, so he called for one minute and then asked for the cost and he was told $1,000,000, so he paid. Jacques Chirac wanted to call France so he called for one minute and he asked for the cost and he was told it''s $1,000,000, so he paid. Then Saddam wanted to call Iraq, so he called for ten minutes and he asked for the cost and he was told $10 and he paid it, but Bush and Chirac complained and wanted to know the reason, so the angel told them, "He made a local call."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde wanted to have a copy of herself, so she went to the US, and they asked her for a sample of her blood. They asked her to come back after a week, so she went after a week and she saw a donkey, and they told her that this is her copy. She decided to go to Australia, and when she went there they asked for a sample of her blood, and they asked her to come back after a week. When she went back she saw a donkey, so she went to Japan, and when she told them what happened with her, they asked her to come back after a week. She asked them why they didn''t need a blood sample, and they told her that they don''t need it, so she left. When she came back after a week she saw an exact copy of herself, and when she asked them how they did it, they said, "We took a blood sample from a donkey."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the similarity between girls and tea? They are both hot and with milk. What is the difference between a girl in church and a girl in the bathroom? The girl in church has a soul full with hope and the girl in the bathroom has a hole full with soap. What is the difference between the sky and the skirt? The sky covers the whole universe and the skirt covers the universal hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the difference between a plate and a booger? A: The plate is on the table, but the booger is under the table. Q: What is the difference between a prince and a booger? A: The prince is the heir to the throne, but the booger is thrown to the air.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fire investigators on Maui have determined the cause of a blaze that destroyed a $127,000 home last month - a short in the homeowner''s newly installed fire prevention alarm system. "This is even worse than last year," said the distraught homeowner, "when someone broke in and stole my new security system..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bank robber in Virginia Beach got a nasty surprise when a dye pack designed to mark stolen money exploded in his Fruit-of-the-Looms. The robber apparently stuffed the loot down the front of his pants as he was running out the door. "He was seen hopping and jumping around," said police spokesman Mike Carey, "with an explosion taking place inside his pants." Police have the man''s charred trousers in custody...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everything that can be invented has been invented. - Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('November 15, 1996 - PSA was following United, taxiing out for departure. PSA called the tower and said "Tower, this is United 586. We''ve got a little problem, so go ahead and let PSA go first." The tower promptly cleared PSA for takeoff before United had a chance to object to the impersonation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quotes from Officer Fitness Reports: He has the wisdom of youth, and the energy of old age. He has carried out each and every one of his duties to his entire satisfaction. This Officer reminds me very much of a gyroscope - always spinning around at a frantic pace, but not really going anywhere. When he joined my ship, this Officer was something of a granny; since then he has aged considerably. In my opinion this pilot should not be authorized to fly below 250 feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After preschool the road of life keeps getting bumpier and bumpier and bumpier. Angela Martin, age 11 Never blow in a cat''s ear because if you do, usually after three or four times, they will bite your lips! And they don''t let go for at least a minute. Lisa Coburn, age 9 Don''t think life is easy, because when you get older it is hard work. I used to think life was easy, now I have to do the dishes every other day. Nick Coleman, age 9 Take risks. I mean, if you like this person and you don''t know if they like you, ask them out and see what happens. I liked this girl and I asked her out. She said no and she hates me now, but I took that risk. Bruce Wagner, age 13 A realist is more correct about things in life than an optimist, but the optimist seems to have more friends and much more fun. Megan, age 14', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When they broke open molecules, they found they were only stuffed with atoms, but when they broke open atoms, they found them stuffed with explosions. When people run around and around in circles we say they are crazy. When planets do it we say they are orbiting. Rainbows are just to look at, not to really understand. Someday we may discover how to make magnets that can point in any direction. A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants to go. Many dead animals in the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil. Genetics explain why you look like your father, and if you don''t, why you should. Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know they''re there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette on a river bank sees a blonde on the far shore and yells to her: "How do I get to the other side of the river?" And the blonde yells back "You''re ON the other side."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Saudis emigrated to America with their families. On the plane ride over they made a bet about who could become more "Americanized" in their first year. As agreed, they met exactly one year later. The first guy pulled up in his Hummer and said to the second guy "I win. There''s no way you can beat me: I just dropped my son off at Little League, I''m on my way to pick my daughter up from cheerleading practice, and I stopped at McDonalds on my way here." And the second guy said "Fuck you, towelhead!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Descartes walked into a McDonalds and ordered a veggieburger. The guy behind the counter asked "Do you want fries with that?" Descartes replied "I think not," and poof - he disappeared.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One guy went to see a doctor because he had a hearing problem, so he met his friend and the conversation began! First guy: "Did the doctor give you your test results?" Second guy: "Yeah. Looks like all those years of phone sex caught up with me. I have hearing AIDS."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a fairy called Nuff. Fair enough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid said to his Dad, "In school I learned Pluto is in outerspace. But they didn''t say where Mickey is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When she told me I was average, she was just being mean. Editor''s note: Mean can mean both not nice but another definition is average.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to feel like I was a man trapped in a woman''s body, but then I was born.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So this kid has been using lots of his dad''s money and the dad says, "Do you think money grows on trees?" "Ya," says the kid. "Well, it doesn''t," says the dad. "So what is money made out of, Dad?" "Paper," the dad says. "And what is paper made out of?" "Shut up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Kuwait. - A. Whitney Brown "When I was a kid, I had two friends, and they were imaginary and they would only play with each other." - Rita Rudner "I don''t know what''s wrong with my television set. I was getting C-Span and the Home Shopping Network on the same station. I actually bought a congressman." - Bruce Baum "USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population." - David Letterman "If God doesn''t destroy Hollywood Boulevard, he owes Sodom and Gomorrah an apology." - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun. Lead me not into temptation...I can find the way myself. The mind is like a parachute; it works much better when it''s open. Jury: Twelve people who determine which client has the better attorney. Miracles are performed every day, the impossible takes longer. Never knock on Death''s door: ring the doorbell and run (he hates that).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. - Hippolyte Taine "No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are here to welcome me." - Unknown "There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer "The cat has too much spirit to have no heart." - Ernest Menaul "Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God." "Time spent with cats is never wasted." Colette "You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats." - Colonial American proverb "Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want." -Joseph Wood Krutch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please don''t tell anyone, this is HOT gossip. After all the years of shit, it''s surprising they are still together! Guess who? THE BUTTOCKS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cats are smarter than dogs. You can''t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez "Managing senior programmers is like herding cats." - Dave Platt "There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." Unknown "In a cat''s eye, all things belong to cats." - English proverb "As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat." - Ellen Perry Berkeley "One cat just leads to another." - Ernest Hemmingway "Dogs come when they''re called; cats take a message and get back to you later." - Mary Bly "People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life." - Faith Resnick "There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats." Anonymous', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once, Mr. Maggi mee was walking along the streets and noticed Mr. Meatball just a few metres ahead of him. He then went up, gave Mr. Meatball a good beating and left. Mr. Meatball, not wanting to take this insult, gathered all his meatball friends and arranged to meet outside Mr. Maggi mee''s house to seek vengence on the beating. They pressed the bell, and Mr. Spaghetti opened the door. They walloped him and as they did, Mr. Spaghetti asked : why are you guys beating me? Mr. Meatball replied : "Don''t think that just because you had yourself rebonded, we wouldn''t recognise you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a monk, living in a monastery, takes a vow of silence, then talks in his sleep, has he broken his vow of silence? If so, who is going to tell on him?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to get some paper from the stationery store, but it had moved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can''t get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote ''thingy,''" she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don''t you drive over there and check about the batteries...it''s a long walk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Years ago when I was working at Customer Service for a gardening company, I came across this tale. It is completely true! A lady came in looking for a soaker hose (a hose that drips water into the soil every few minutes) I helped her find it, but soon, she came back with a complaint. "What''s the problem," I asked. "It leaks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde phoned police to report that thieves had been in her car. "They''ve stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator," she cried out. However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "Never mind, I got in the back seat by mistake."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A terrible diet and room with no ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was killed by his own gas. There was no mark on his body but autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His diet had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage(and a couple of other things). It was just the right combination of foods. It appears that the man died in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been opened, it wouldn''t have been fatal. But the man was shut, up in his, near airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He was a big man with a huge capacity for creating ''this deadly gas''." Three of the rescuers got sick and one was hospitalized.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to "The Australian," an airliner recently encountered severe vibration in flight. The captain decided to make an emergency landing, and switched on the seat belt sign. The vibration stopped immediately. A passenger emerged from a lavatory and explained that he had been jogging in place inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on end. Finally she couldn''t take it any longer, and told him, "Listen, it means nothing, they even have a Vice President of peas at the grocery store!" "Really?" he said. Not sure if this was true or not, Tom decided to call the grocery store. A clerk answers and Tom says, "Can I please talk to the Vice President of peas?" The clerk replies, "Canned or frozen?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to inside contacts, the Japanese banking crisis shows no signs of ameliorating. If anything, it''s getting worse. Following last week''s news that Origami Bank had folded, we are hearing that Sumo Bank has gone belly up, and Bonsai Bank plans to cut back some of its branches. Karaoke Bank is up for sale, and is going for a song. Meanwhile, shares in Kamikaze Bank have nose-dived, and 500 back-office staff at Karate Bank got the chop. Analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank, and staff there fear they may get a raw deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the USA they go ice skating. In Canada we go skating; we just assume it will be on ice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tommy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I''ve got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there''s somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there''s somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under. You gotta help me, I''m going crazy!" "Just put yourself in my hands for two years," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I''ll cure your fears." "How much do you charge?" "A hundred dollars per visit." "I''ll sleep on it," said Tommy. Six months later the doctor met Tommy on the street. "Why didn''t you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist. "For a hundred bucks a visit? A bartender cured me for ten dollars." "Is that so! How?" "He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a definition of a " suicide bomber"? Answer: "martyr-dumb"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Room service? Send up a larger room. Who are you going to believe; me, or your own eyes? A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five. I never forget a face, but in your case I''ll be glad to make an exception. One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I''ll never know. I must say that I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library and read a book. I don''t care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher - "Didn''t you promise to behave?" Johnny - "Yes, sir." Teacher - "And didn''t I promise to punish you if you misbehaved?" Johnny - "Yes, sir, but since I broke my promise, you don''t have to keep yours." Teacher - "How can one person make so many mistakes in one day?" Johnny - "I get up early." Teacher - "Well, at least there''s one thing I can say about your son." Father - "What''s that?" Teacher - "With grades like these, he couldn''t be cheating."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a little girl climbed onto Santa''s lap, Santa asked the usual, "And what would you like for Christmas?" The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a moment, then gasped - "Didn''t you get my E-mail?" A 7-year old child was drawing a picture of the Nativity. The picture was very good, including Mary, Joseph, and of course baby Jesus. However, there was a fat man standing in the corner of the stable that just did not seem to fit in. When the child was asked about it, she replied, "Oh, that''s Round John Virgin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman was walking the beat when suddenly he saw a large black man pummeling a small jewish man as he pinned him to the concrete. The policeman quickly rushed in to break up the scuffle. He asked the black man what was going on and why he was beating the helpless man. The black man responded "He called me a black bastard!" The policeman looked down to the beaten jewish man and asked. "Is it true? Did you call this man a black bastard?" The jewish man looked at the policeman and said "No! The gentleman asked me where the store was and I told him he was a block past it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My bedroom is so small... The mice are hunchbacked. I shut the door and and the doorknob was in bed with me. I have to go outside to change my mind. If I stand up, I''m on the second floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-year old put his shoes on by himself. His mother noticed that the left was on the right and the right was on the left. She said, "Paul, your shoes are on the wrong feet." He looked up at her and said, "No they''re not, Mom. I KNOW they''re my feet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So there was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead and they were running from the police but all they could find was a barn. They were in a hurry to hide so the brunette hid in the horse''s stable, the redhead hid in a tree, and the blonde hid behind a few boxes of oranges. When the policemen came to the barn, they went to the horses stable and the policeman heard something. "Wait!" he said. "I hear breathing!" But the brunette went, "Neigh! Neigh!" "Oh, it''s just a horse," the policeman said. Then he walked around and came upon a tree and heard breathing. "Stop!" he said. "I hear breathing in the tree!" "Caww! Caww!" went the redhead. "Oh,it''s just a bird," said the policeman. Next, the policemen came upon a barn with a stack of boxes of oranges. "Wait!" Said the policeman. "I hear breathing!" Then the blonde said "I''m an orange! I''m an orange!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s There Hatch Hatch Who? God Bless You.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is explaining Biology to her 4th grade students, "Human beings are the only animals that stutter," she says. A little girl raises her hand, "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered," she volunteered. The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident. "Well," she began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty and the rottweiler who lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!" "That must have been scary," said the teacher. "It sure was,"said the little girl. "My kitty went ''Fffff, Fffff, Fffff''... and before he could say ''F*ck,'' the rottweiler ate him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 guys are sitting at a bar after a hard days work and start talking about their wives. 1st guy: "You know what, my wife is an angel." 2nd guy: "Gee, you sure are lucky, my wife is still alive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Aesop Aesop who? Aesop I saw a Putty Cat, I did I did!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was growing up I never bothered to learn French. So I tried very hard to avoid French in general, since I didn''t know any of it. It was very hard to avoid... ...since my family spoke french...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A really huge muscular guy with a bad stutter goes to a counter in a department store and asks, "W-w-w-where''s the m-m-m-men''s dep-p-p-partment?" The clerk behind the counter just looks at him and says nothing. The man repeats himself: "W-w-w-where''s the m-m-m-men''s dep-p-p-partment?" Again, the clerk doesn''t answer him. The guy asks several more times: "W-w-w-where''s the m-m-m-men''s dep-p-p-partment?" And the clerk just seems to ignore him. Finally, the guy storms off in anger. The customer who was waiting in line behind the guy asks the clerk, "Why wouldn''t you answer that guy''s question?" The clerk answers, "D-d-d-do you th-th-th-think I w-w-w-want to get b-b-b-beat up?!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady standing at the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice. After a week of this, she can''t stand it any more, takes her complaint to a supervisor in the personnel department and states that she wants to write a sexual harassment grievance against him. The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled by this decision and asks,"What''s sexually threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?" The woman replies,"It''s Keith, the midget."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 2nd grade teacher decides to teach sex education to her class. She starts out by drawing a penis on the chalk board and asks the class, "Does anyone know what this is?" Little Johnny says, "Yes, my dad has 2 of them!" Teacher, "Are you sure about that?" Little Johnny, "Yes, he uses the small skinny one to go to the bathroom, and the big long one to brush the baby-sitter''s teeth."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so Dumb she put training wheels on your tricycle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the ugliest member of wocka? [Name Removed - This joke offends some users - Joke awaiting deletion]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My geometry tutor told me, "A six-sided polygon is called a hexagon, a five-sided one is called a pentagon." "What about two sided ones?" I asked. "They don''t exist," was his response. "I beg to differ! I think we should just let bi-gons be bi-gons."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Veni, Vedi, Visa: I came, I saw, I did a little shopping. Gravity...it''s not just a good Idea, it''s the Law. First things first, but not necessarily in that order. My mother is a travel agent for guilt trips. Measure wealth not by the things you have, but by the things you have for which you would not take money. Look out for #1. Don''t step in #2 either. AAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse. Am I ignorant or apathetic? I don''t know and don''t care! Can you repeat the part after, "Listen very carefully"? Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dyslexia: it can warn without striking! Give and you might receive. Take and be sure of it. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I''m not so sure. I''m in a phone booth at the corner of Walk and Don''t Walk. Jealousy is all the fun you think they have. Originality is the art of concealing your source. Synonym: word used when you can''t spell the one you wanted. The Apathy Anonymous meeting was canceled due to lack of interest. You can tell a real programmer by the keyboard-shaped dents in his forehead. You have mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you are a redneck when you do not speak your first word until your 18th birthday and that word is WELFARE!.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Gynecologists retire at a younger age that other doctors? They get tunnel vision!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so old, if she''s not wearing a bra, it looks like she has four legs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she sat on Bigfoot and turned him into "Little Toe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was working in a scrap yard during summer vacation at an engineering university. I used to work repairing construction equipment. One afternoon, I was taking apart a piling hammer that had some very large bolts holding it together. One of the nuts had corroded on to the bolt; to free it, I started heating the nut with an oxy-acetylene torch. As I was doing this, one of the dimmest apprentices I have ever known came along. He asked me what I was doing. I patiently explained that if I heated the nut, it would grow larger and release its grip on the bolt so I could then remove it. "So things get larger when they get hot, do they?" he asked. Suddenly, an idea flashed into my mind (I know not from where.) "Yes," I said, "that''s why days are longer in summer and shorter in winter." There was a long pause, then his face cleared and he said, "You know, I always wondered about that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two guys from Alabama who love to fish, and they wanted to try some ice fishing. They''d heard about it up in Canada, and they took off for up there. The lakes were frozen nicely. They stopped just before they got to a lake at a little bait shop and got all their tackle. One of them said, "We''re going to need an ice pick." So they got that, and they took off. In about two hours, one of them was back at the shop and said, "We''re going to need another dozen ice picks." Well, the fellow in the shop wanted to ask some questions, but he didn''t. He sold him the picks, and the the guy left. In about an hour, he was back. "We''re going to need all the ice picks you''ve got." The bait man couldn''t stand it any longer. "By the way," he asked, "how are you fellows doing?" "Not very well at all," he said. "We don''t even have the boat in the water yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience. I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and spreasheet progroms. I am loyal to my employer at all costs.Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail. Reason for leaving last job: They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 am every day. I couldn''t work under those conditions. Failed bar exam with relatively high grades. My goal is to be a meteorologist, but since I possess no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage. As indicted, I have over five years of analyzing investments. Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store. The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous employers. I am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season..."I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first." Shaquille O''Neal, on his lack of championships: "I''ve won at every level, except college and pro." Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: "My sister''s expecting a baby, and I don''t know if I''m going to be an uncle or an aunt." Steve Spurrier, Florida football coach, telling Gator fans that a fire at Auburn''s football dorm had destroyed 20 books: "But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn''t been colored yet." Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings." Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F''s and one D: "Son, looks to me like you''re spending too much time on one subject."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. "You don''t want to try these techniques at home." "Why not?" asked someone from the back of the audience. "I watched my wife''s routine at breakfast for years," the expert explained. "She made lots of trips to the refrigerator, stove, table and cabinets, often carrying just a single item at a time. ''Hon,'' I suggested, ''Why don''t you try carrying several things at once?''" The voice from the back asked, "Did it save time?" The expert replied, "Actually, yes. It used to take her 20 minutes to get breakfast ready. Now I do it in seven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That I would never watch the news, and I would be totally out of touch with the world happenings. That if you wear polyester everyone will ask why you are so dressed up. That I could change so much and barely realize it. That college kids throw airplanes too. That you can know everything and fail a test. That you can know nothing and ace a test. (I know a bunch of us are testimony to this one!) That my parents would become so much smarter in the last few years. That I would become one of those people that my parents warned me about. That the more money your parents give you, the less you have every time you check your account!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day an immigrant from Poland entered a New York City Police Precinct to report that his American wife was planning to kill him. The police officer on duty was intrigued by this, and he asked, "How sure are ya that she is gonna kill ya? Did she threaten to kill ya?" "No," replied the nervous immigrant. "Did ya hear her tell someone else that she''s gonna kill ya?" "No." "Did someone tell ya that your wife is gonna kill ya?" "No." "Then why in God''s name did ya think she''s gonna kill ya?" asked the exasperated police officer. "Because I found bottle on dresser and I think she gonna poison me!" He handed the police officer the suspect bottle. The police officer took one look at the label on the bottle and started to laugh out loud. The immigrant became indignant and said, "What''s so funny? Can''t you see the label on bottle says ''Polish Remover''?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honeywell & Imasco & Home Oil = Honey, I''m Home. Denison Mines & Alliance & Metal Mining = Mine, All Mine. 3M & JC Penney & Canadian Opera Company = 3 Penney Opera. Crabtree & Evelyn and Apple Computer = Crab Apple. Swissair & Cheseborough-Ponds = Swisscheese. John Deere & Abitibi-Price = Deere Abi. And don''t forget the failed merger between Yahoo and Netscape: Net''n''Yahoo. It didn''t work out because they were afraid they would have to relocate the headquarters to Tel Aviv.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day two robins walked along the road, planning their day. Robin #1:Oh my god, we totally have to get some bronzing oil! Robin #2:Duh, I mean if are going to spend the whole day at the beach we totally have to! That day while the robins were tanning on the beach a big bad fox came along. He took one look at them and said: Fox:Mmmm, I love Baskin'' Robins!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s okay to kiss a fool, and it''s also okay to let a fool kiss you. But NEVER let a kiss fool you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who tows the tow trucks when they break down?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (NULL, '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our old friend Gladys attended church services one particular Sunday. The sermon seemed to go on forever, and many in the congregation fell asleep. After the service, to be social, she walked up to a very sleepy looking gentleman, in an attempt to revive him from his stupor, extended her hand in greeting, and said, "Hello, I''m Gladys Dunn," to which the gentleman replied, "You''re not the only one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The young couple invited their aged parson for Sunday dinner. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked their son what they were having. "Goat," the little boy replied. "Goat?" replied the startled man of the cloth, "Are you sure about that?" "Yep," said the youngster. "I heard Pa say to Ma, ''Might as well have the old goat for dinner today as any other day.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are part-time band leaders semiconductors? If athletes get athlete''s foot, do astronauts get mistletoe? Does killing time damage eternity? Daylight savings time - why are they saving it and where do they keep it? Do pilots in a hurry take crash-courses? How do you get off a nonstop flight?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Iraqi Head Found With Arms 2. Man Loses Toes in Snow, but Timesheet Submitted 3. Crack found on Governor''s Daughter 4. Miners Refuse To Work After Death 5. Eight Arms Found In Octopus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LITTLE MISS MUFFET''S MOTHER: "Well, all I''ve got to say is if you don''t get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room, there''ll be a lot more spiders around here!" ALBERT EINSTEIN''S MOTHER: "But, Albert, it''s your senior picture. Can''t you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something...?" GEORGE WASHINGTON''S MOTHER: "The next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!" JONAH''S MOTHER: "That''s a nice story, but now tell me where you''ve really been for the last three days." SUPERMAN''S MOTHER: "Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we''ve decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending so much time in all those phone booths?" THOMAS EDISON''S MOTHER: "Of course I''m proud that you invented the electric light bulb, Thomas. Now turn off that light and get to bed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PAUL REVERE''S MOTHER: "I don''t care where you think you have to go, young man. Midnight is past your curfew!" MARY, MARY, QUITE CONTRARY''S MOTHER: "I don''t mind you having a garden, Mary, but does it have to be growing under your bed?" MONA LISA''S MOTHER: "After all that money your father and I spent on braces, Mona, that''s the biggest smile you can give us?" HUMPTY DUMPTY''S MOTHER: "Humpty, If I''ve told you once, I''ve told you a hundred times not to sit on that wall. But would you listen to me? Noooo!" COLUMBUS'' MOTHER: "I don''t care what you''ve discovered, Christopher. You still could have written!" BABE RUTH''S MOTHER: "Babe, how many times have I told you - quit playing ball in the house! That''s the third broken window this week!" MICHELANGELO''S MOTHER: "Mike, can''t you paint on walls like other children? Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NAPOLEON''S MOTHER: "All right, Napoleon. If you aren''t hiding your report card inside your jacket, then take your hand out of there and prove it!" CUSTER''S MOTHER: "Now, George, remember what I told you - don''t go biting off more than you can chew!" ABRAHAM LINCOLN''S MOTHER: "Again with the stovepipe hat, Abe? Can''t you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?" BARNEY''S MOTHER: "I realize strained plums are your favorite, Barney, but you''re starting to look a little purple." MARY''S MOTHER: "I''m not upset that your lamb followed you to school, Mary, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you." BATMAN''S MOTHER: "It''s a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the insurance is going to be?" GOLDILOCKS'' MOTHER: "I''ve got a bill here for a busted chair from the Bear family. You know anything about this, Goldie?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In his legal practice, Abraham Lincoln was never greedy for fees and discouraged unnecessary litigation. A man came to him in a passion, asking him to bring a suit for $2.50 against an impoverished debtor. Lincoln tried to dissuade him, but the man was determined upon revenge. When he saw that the creditor was not to be put off, Lincoln asked for and got $10 as his legal fee. He gave half of this to the defendant, who thereupon willingly confessed to the debt and paid up the $2.50, thus settling the matter to the entire satisfaction of the irate plaintiff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, a barber found two MIT students wanting to buy his barber pole. They offered a good price for it, so the barber sold it to them. So - these two guys drove around all day in a pickup truck carrying the barber pole. They kept getting stopped by the police, who were sure they had stolen the pole. But each time, the students referred back to the barber they had bought the pole from. So finally, an APB went out all over Boston, saying that if police saw two students driving around with a barber pole, they should leave them alone. The next day, every single barber pole in Boston was missing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In my college dorm we had one of those irritating type guys who was born with more money than most of us could ever dream of earning, and naturally we resented his Porsche, his boat, and the women who hung all over same. The guy went out of his way to remind us all about his money, car, and especially the women. Most of us were 2 and 3 to a dorm room, but he had a room all to himself at the end of the hall in the dorm. So........ when he took off for an extended weekend, a bunch of us theatre department freaks went to his door, removed the doorknob, plastered over the entire wall at the end of the hall, nailed up new wood molding, painted the entire hallway a new color and changed all the remaining door numbers. When our "target" returned, his room had simply vanished!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pythagorean Theorem - 24 words. Lord''s Prayer - 66 words. Archimedes'' Principle - 67 words. 10 Commandments - 179 words. Gettysburg Address - 286 words. Declaration of Independence - 1,300 words. US Government regulations on the sale of cabbage - 26,911 words.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of Morris, one of the older workmen. After several minutes, Morris had enough. "Why don''t you put your money where your mouth is?" he said. "I will bet a week''s wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that building that you won''t be able to wheel back." "You''re on, old man," the braggart replied. "It''s a bet! Let''s see what you''ve got." Morris reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles, then, nodding to the young man, he said, "All right. Get in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Signs That Were Found In Peoples'' Kitchens: A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen, and this kitchen is delirious. No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes. A husband is someone who takes out the trash and gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator. A clean house is a sign of a misspent life. Help keep the kitchen clean - eat out. Housework done properly can kill you. Countless number of people have eaten in this kitchen and gone on to lead normal lives.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recent survey shows that 95% of men admit to pleasuring themselves sexually... and that the remaining 5% are liars!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a golf ball and a woman''s G-spot? A man will spend 20 minutes looking for a golf ball!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Susie was watching her father, a pastor, write a sermon. "How do you know what to say?" she asked. "Why, God tells me." "Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a question in our company newsletter asking about whether they could water the flowers in the bathroom since they were looking wilted and sick. The response was, "The flowers are artificial." [Editor''s note: Evidently some employees created a rest room gas cloud powerful enough to wilt artificial plants. You have to admire that on some level]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy was an inveterate drunkard. The parish priest ran into him one day totally inebriated, attempting to stumble home, and gave him a strong lecture against drinking. The good father was able to convince Paddy that, "If you continue drinking as you do, you''ll gradually get smaller and smaller, and eventually you''ll turn into a mouse." This frightened the life out of Paddy. He went home that night, and could not get that thought out of his mind. He couldn''t sleep for a week worrying about the priest''s threat and finally said to his wife, "Bridget....if you should notice me getting smaller and smaller, will ye kill that blasted cat?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister''s house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store. When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen,and inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven. When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird. With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Patricia, you''ve cooked a pregnant bird!" At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs! Yep.................SHE''S BLONDE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. CADDY -- 2 women talking about a 3rd who isn''t there to defend herself. 2. CHIPPING -- Time to get our nails done again. 3. DOUBLE BOGIE -- "Casablanca" followed by "African Queen." 4. FAIRWAY -- Splitting the bill when the girls go to lunch. 5. GOOD LIE -- Weight on our driver''s license. 6. GREENS -- Lunch we eat when we''d really love a cheeseburger. 7. HOLE-IN-ONE -- Time to get new pantyhose. 8. IRON -- What guys need to learn to do their own shirts. 9. ROUGH -- Getting a guy to understand, well, pretty much anything. 10. SHAFT -- You watch the kids while he gets to go golfing. 11. SLICE -- "No thanks. . .just a sliver." 12. TEES -- Putting on that Victoria Secret Negligee. 13. WATER HAZARD -- Giving the kids too much to drink before a road trip. 14. WEDGE -- Bathing suit that''s too tight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Smiths were proud of their family tradition. Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower and the family included Senators and Wall Street Wizards. The family decided to compile a family history, a legacy for their children and grandchildren. So the family hired a fine author to put together all their research notes, only a problem arose - how to handle Great Uncle George, who was executed in the electric chair. The author said not to worry, for he could handle the story tactfully. So the book appeared and it said... "Great Uncle George occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution. He was attached to his position by the strongest of ties, and his death came as a great shock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Operator? I''d like the number of the Scottish knitwear company in Woven. "I can''t find a town called ''Woven''? Are you sure?" "Yes. That''s what it says on the label - ''Woven in Scotland''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson, who is coming to visit with his wife: "You come to the front door of the apartment complex. I am in apartment 14T. There is a big panel at the door. With your elbow, push button 14T. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, hit 14. When you get out I am on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell." "Grandma, that sounds easy, but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?" "You''re coming empty handed?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A well-respected surgeon was relaxing on his sofa one evening just after arriving home from work. As he was tuning into the evening news, the phone rang. The doctor calmly answered it and heard the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line. "We need a fourth for poker," said the friend. "I''ll be right over," whispered the doctor. As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, "Is it serious?" "Oh yes, quite serious," said the doctor gravely. "In fact, three doctors are there already!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Real friends are those who, when you think you''ve made a fool of yourself, don''t feel you''ve done a permanent job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Transportation in the Middle Ages by Orson Cart. "Growing up in the Balkans" by Hugo Slavia. "The Outboard Motor Died" by Rhoda Shaw. "Answering the Questions of the Universe" by Howard I. Know. "Our Son, Russell, the Chef" by Mr. & Mrs. Upsumgrub. "How to Write a Mystery Novel" by Paige Turner. "The Great English Breakfast" by Chris P. Bacon. "Vacation Spots in the Tropics" by Sandy Beech.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Willy was a chemist; Little Willy is no more - For what he thought was H2O, Was H2SO4. Little Willy played with dynamite, Couldn''t understand it quite. Curiosity never pays, It rained Willy seven days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ben and Zero are talking when Ben says, "Hey, Zero, if you can tear this piece of paper in half, I''ll give you a quarter." Zero then proceeds to tear the paper in half. Ben takes one of the halves, tears it in half, and gives it to Zero, saying, "Here''s your quarter!" Zero wanders off, saying how neat that is and wouldn''t it be great to find someone else to pull this on. He meets Tommy, and says, "If you can tear this piece of paper in half, I''ll give you 25 cents..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you help a friend in need, he is sure to remember you -the next time he''s in need.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy is adopted from Korea and is flown to the USA to meet his new parents. A few years later the parents decide to adopt again on the way to the airport the little boy sees planes coming in to land. He says to his mother, "Look at all the babies being born." (he thinks all babies come on air planes Ha Ha)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man decides to take the opportunity while his wife is away to paint the wooden toilet seat. The wife comes home sooner than expected, sits, and gets the seat stuck to her rear. She is understandably distraught about this and asks her husband to drive her to the doctor. She puts on a large overcoat so as to cover the stuck seat, and they go. When they get to the doctor''s, the man lifts his wife''s coat to show their predicament. The man asks, "Doctor, have you ever seen anything like this before?" "Well, yes," the doctor replies, "but never framed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seen on rear mud-flaps of a large truck left mud-flap right mud-flap Passing Side Suicide / ------ ------ \ \ ------ ------ / El Paso El Cruncho', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A large two-engined train was crossing America. After they had gone some distance, one of the engines broke down. "No problem," the engineer thought, and carried on at half power. Farther on down the line, the other engine broke down, and the train came to a standstill. The engineer decided he should inform the passengers about why the train had stopped, and made the following announcement: "Ladies and gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that both engines have failed, and we will be stuck here for some time. The good news is that you decided to take the train and not fly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A car was involved in an accident in a street. As expected, a large crowd gathered. A newspaper reporter, anxious to get his story, could not get near the car. Being a clever sort, he started shouting loudly, "Let me through! Let me through! I am the son of the victim." The crowd made way for him. Lying in front of the car was a donkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fisherman returned to shore with a giant marlin that was bigger and heavier than he. On the way to the cleaning shed, he met a second fisherman who had a stringer with a dozen baby minnows. The second fisherman looked at the marlin, turned to the first fisherman and said, "Only caught one, eh?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After interviewing a particularly short-spoken job candidate, the interviewer described the person to his boss as rather monosyllabic. The boss said, "Really? Where is Monosyllabia?" Thinking that his boss was just kidding, he played along and said that it was just south of Elbonia. He replied, "Oh, you mean over by Croatia?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('El Nino storms are affecting trade with Asian countries. A freighter bound for Long Beach Calif. with a cargo of yo-yos got caught in a particularly violent storm and sank 65 times.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When asked for her occupation, a woman charged with a traffic violation said she was a schoolteacher. The judge was delighted. "Madam, I have waited years for a schoolteacher to appear before this court. Now please sit down at that table and write ''I will not pass through a red light'' five hundred times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A truck driver was going south on I-75, when he came upon a weight station. When he pulled in and got on the scales to be weighed, the scale master told the driver that he was 900lbs. over weight. The truck driver replied, "I can take care or that." The scale master asked he how could he fix the problem? The driver said, "Let me go around back, and I''ll fix the overweight problem." The scale master agreed to let him fix his problem. About half an hour later the truck driver got back on the scales, and the scale master said, "Driver, you are still 900lbs. over weight." The truck driver said, "I don''t understand what went wrong. I let 50lbs. out of each tire on the rig." After thinking the problem over the scale master said, "Well, 18 tires times 50lbs. would equal 900lbs. I guess my scales must be wrong. I''m sorry driver, you may continue on down the road, and have a nice day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes. Their Disney password was "GoofyMickeyMinniePluto" and I asked why it was so long. "Because," my son explained, "they said it had to have at least four characters."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I joined a health club last year, spent about $400, and haven''t lost a pound. Apparently, you have to show up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you ever watch the Food Network? Ya, they cook stuff that you won''t even think about cooking, and afterwards you don''t even bother to even remember it. People just sit at home and drool... It''s like porno for fat people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cats raise their tails when you stroke their backs? To let you know you''ve reached the end of the cat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a very smart horse. Anything that was shown him, he mastered easily, until one day, his teachers tried to teach him about rectangular coordinates and he couldn''t understand them. All the horse''s acquaintances and friends tried to figure out what was the matter and couldn''t. Then a new guy looked at the problem and said, "Of course he can''t do it. Why, you''re putting Descartes before the horse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fe Fe Fe \ | / Fe --*-- Fe / | \ Fe Fe Fe A ferris wheel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears and she answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear." "Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But... what happened to your other ear?" "The son of a bitch called back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Of a swimmer Saw four sharks, Off the coast. Three he missed, One almost. Tight Rope Walker Used no net, Knew no fear. Made mis-step, Wound up here. Novice farmer Here lies Clyde, Whose life was full. Until he tried, To milk a bull.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde bought a new car that has a computer which can fix the car when anything happens. So she went and blew the engine and the computer said, "In the name of the manufacturer, get fixed," and it was fixed. Then she broke the window and the computer said, "In the name of the manufacturer, get fixed," and it was fixed. Then she said to herself "It''s time for the ultimate test," and she jumped from the bridge and the computer said, "In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JCPenny blowdryer: do not use while sleeping ********** caution: hot chocolate may be hot **********', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love thy neighbor all through the day... but first make sure his wife''s away! Boyfriend: I''m going to buy us some condoms. Girlfriend: Why? You can''t fit all that in one! Boyfriend: You barely fit in a bra! Want to hear two short jokes and a long joke? A 2-year old boy, a 12-year old boy, and a 26-year old boy. Do you know which one I want to have? The 26-year old for nothing but length.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three mice were sitting in a bar talking about how tough they were. The first mouse slams a shot and says, "I play with mouse traps for fun. I''ll run into one on purpose and as it is closing on me, I grab the bar and bench press it twenty or thirty times." And with that he slams another shot. The second mouse slams a shot and says, "That''s nothing. I take those Decon tablets, cut them up and snort them just for the fun of it." And with that he slams another shot. The third mouse slams a shot, gets up and walks away. The first two mice look at each other, and then turn to the third mouse and ask, "Where the hell are you going?" The third mouse stops and replies, "I''m going home to fuck the cat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. With all the technology that they have, its a wonder that they still use lightbulbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pro football team had just finished their daily practice session when a large turkey came strutting onto the field. While the players gazed in amazement, the turkey walked up to the head coach and demanded a tryout. Everyone stared in silence as the turkey caught pass after pass and ran right through the defensive line. When the turkey returned to the sidelines, the coach shouted, "You''re terrific!!! Sign up for the season, and I''ll see to it that you get a huge bonus." "Forget the bonus," the turkey said, "All I want to know is, does the season go past Thanksgiving Day?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young couple with a box of condoms proceeded to burn some rubber. When they were finished, she discovered that there were only six condoms remaining in the box of 12, so she asked him, "What happened to the other five condoms?" His nervous reply was, "Er, I masturbated with them." Later, she then approached her male confidant friend, told him the story, and then asked him, "Have you ever done that?" "Yeah, once or twice," he told her. "You mean you''ve actually masturbated with a condom before?" she asked. "Oh," he said, "I thought you were asking if I''d ever lied to my girlfriend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A car breaks down along the highway one day, so the driver eases it over onto the shoulder. He jumps out of the car, opens the trunk, and pulls out two men in long black trench coats. The men stand behind the car, open up their coats and start exposing themselves to all the oncoming traffic. This results in one of the worst pile-ups. When the police questioned him why he put two deviates along the side of the road, the man replied, "I broke down and was just using my emergency flashers!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kids were bragging about the toys they owned. One of them said, "This is Action Man! He''s been in Viet Nam, Operation Desert Storm, Iraq - and the vacuum cleaner twice!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she needs a boomerang to put on her belt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two lawyers are leaving the office. "I can''t wait to get home," says one of them. "As soon as I walk in the door, I''m going to rip my wife''s panties right off." "I know the feeling," the other says. "No, I''m serious," says the first. "They''re killing me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma smells so bad that she made an onion cry!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Perhaps you''ve heard of the man who thought he was dead? In reality he was very much alive. His delusion became such a problem that his family finally paid for him to see a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist spent many laborious sessions trying to convince the man he was still alive. Nothing seemed to work. Finally the doctor tried one last approach. He took out his medical books and proceeded to show the patient that dead men don''t bleed. After hours of tedious study, the patient seemed convinced that dead men don''t bleed. "Do you now agree that dead men don''t bleed?" the doctor asked. "Yes, I do," the patient replied. "Very well, then," the doctor said. He took out a pin and pricked the patient''s finger. Out came a trickle of blood. The doctor asked, "What does that tell you?" "Oh my goodness!" the patient exclaimed as he stared incredulously at his finger ... "Dead men do bleed!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Bobby had been searching through a stationer''s stock of greeting cards for some time when a clerk asked, "Just what is it you''re looking for? A birthday greeting, message to a sick friend? An anniversary, or a congratulations to your mom and dad?" Little Bobby shook his head and answered, "No. Er...got any blank report cards?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do u call 1 Paki on the moon? Answer: A problem What do u call 10 Paki''s on the moon? Answer: A problem What do u call 100 Paki''s on the moon? Answer: A problem What do u call all the Paki''s on the moon? Answer: Problem solved', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man died and went to heaven, he went to the golden gates, and saw God. He didn''t know who God was, so he took one look and said, "My god, Who the hell are you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. See and Mr. Soar were old friends. See owned a saw and Soar owned a seesaw. Now See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw before Soar saw See, which made Soar sore. Had Soar seen See''s saw before See saw Soar''s seesaw, then See''s saw would not have sawed Soar''s seesaw. But See saw Soar and Soar''s seesaw before Soar saw See''s saw, so See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw. It was a shame to let See see Soar so sore just because See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One summer day a man came home early from work and was greeted by his wife dressed in very sexy lingerie and heels. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So, he tied her up and went golfing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A ninety-year-old man living in a rest home was granted a weekend pass. He stopped in his favorite bar, sat at the end, and ordered a drink. He noticed a seventy-year-old woman at the other end of the bar, and told the bartender to buy the lovely young lady a drink. As the evening progressed, the old man joined the lady, and they went to her apartment, where they got stinky and wrinkly. Four days later, the old man noticed that he had developed a drip, and headed to the rest home doctor. After careful examination the doctor asked the old man if he had engaged in sex recently. The old man said, "Sure!" The doctor asked if he could remember who the woman was and where she lived. "Sure, why?" asked the old man. "Well you''d better get over there," replied the doctor, "You''re about to come!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy asks a young blonde woman he''s just slept with, "Am I the first guy you ever made love to?" The blonde ashes out her cigarette and replies, "You might be. Your face looks familiar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes into Wal-Mart and tells the clerk she wants a refund for the toaster she bought because it doesn''t work. The clerk tells her that he can''t give her a refund because she bought it on special. All of a sudden, the woman throws her arms up in the air and starts screaming! "GRAB MY BREASTS! GRAB MY BREASTS!" The clerk, not knowing what to do, runs to get the store manager. The manager comes up to the Woman and asks, "What''s wrong?" She explains the situation with the toaster. He tells her that he can''t give her a refund because she bought it on special. Once again, the woman throws her arms up in the air and starts screaming, "GRAB MY BREASTS! GRAB MY BREASTS!" In shock, the store manager pleads, "Ma''am, why are you saying that?" In a huff, the woman says, "BECAUSE, I LIKE TO HAVE MY BREASTS GRABBED WHEN I''M GETTING SCREWED!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the zoo a little girl sees two monkeys having sex. Her mom hurriedly explains, "Oh...they''re just baking cakes." The next morning the little girl says, "Mommy, Mommy, you and Daddy baked cakes last night!" "Um, what makes you think that?" the mother asks nervously. "Because this morning there was icing all over the couch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have not been to confession for six months. On top of that, I''ve been with a loose woman. The priest sighs. "Is that you, little Tommy O''Shaughnessy?" "Yes, Father, ''tis I." "And who might be the woman you were with?" "I shan''t be tellin'' you, Father. It would ruin her reputation." "Well, Tommy, I''m bound to find out sooner or later, so you may as well tell me now. Was it Brenda O''Malley?" "I cannot say." "Was it Patricia Fitzgerald?" "I''ll never tell." "Was it Lisa O''Shanter?" "I''m sorry, but I''ll not name her." "Was it Cathy O''Dell?" "My lips are sealed." "Was it Fiona Mallory, then?" "Please, Father, I cannot tell you." The priest sighs in frustration. "You''re a steadfast lad, Tommy O'' Shaughnessy, and I admire that. But you''ve sinned, and you must atone. Be off with you now." Tommy walks back to his pew. His friend Sean slides over and whispers, "What''d you get?" "Five more good leads!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cock-a-doodle-doo, it''s time for chicken, Cock-a-doodle-doo, it''s time for a feast, Eat a ninety-piece bucket then you can tell, He''s been to Cluckin'' Bell! Chicken is a bird with a tiny brain, So we assume he doesn''t feel any pain. We shrink their heads and we breed ''em fast; Six wings, forty breasts and then they''re gassed. Cock-a-doodle-doo we''re psychotic crazies, Cock-a-doodle-doo factory farming''s insane. We denied it all before our stock price fell, Come down to Cluckin'' Bell!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My American History teacher was giving a lecture about the first three presidents. A lot of people in my class can''t remember presidents very well. "You all are brainwashed," he said. Of course, there was confusion in the room at this comment. "Let me demonstrate," he continued, "''I''m Cuckoo for...''" "Cocoa Puffs!" the class replied. "You don''t know the ninth president of the United States, but you know that you are ''Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.''" Then, this one guy in my class said, "If the presidents were finger-lickin'' good, we''d remember ''em."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bag of Cheetos has a contest. It says "No Purchase neccesary" but the code is on the inside...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Discovering too late that a watermelon spiked with vodka had accidentally been served to a luncheon meeting of local ministers, the restaurant''s owner waited nervously for the clerics'' reaction. "Quick, man," he whispered to the waiter, "what did they say?" "Nothing," replied the waiter. "They were all too busy slipping the seeds into their pockets."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was out camping and my glasses had broken the day before, so I couldn''t wear them. Without my glasses, I can''t see anything past 10 feet in front of my face. So I was out camping (W/out glasses) and I go to use the bathroom, and I walk into the wrong one, (and two cute girls were outside picking berries) and I come out and they start to laugh. I found out about two hours later that I walked into the wrong bathroom. An hour and a half later, i was eating a late lunch/early dinner, and I go to use the bathroom, at this local Texmex resturant, and the bathroom was outside, and I walked into the wrong one again. It was really embarrassing. PS, I''m not blonde, just on the inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once an old woman living in a cottage. Her husband had died three years ago. Suddenly, the phone rang. She picked it up and a deep voice boomed: "I am the vindow viper and I''m coming into your town." She put the phone down, thinking it was some boys playing a prank on her. About half an hour later the phone rang again. She picked it up and the deep voice bellowed: "I am the vindow viper and I''m coming down your road." Again, the woman put the phone down, thinking that the boys were very determined. Around a minute later, the phone rang again. She sighed and picked up the phone. Again, the deeep voice boomed: "I am the vindow viper and I''m just outside your door!" She put the phone down and the doorbell rang. She opened the door and there was an old man standing there. She said: "Who are you?" He said: "I am the vindow viper and I''ve come to vipe your vindows!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so dumb, she tells you Yo Momma jokes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what would be odd? Some one with a deep, dark voice calls you and says, "I know what your phone number is...heh heh..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Virgin Mobile wanted to sponsor the national team. SAFA (South African Footballing Association) refused to let it happen. They said, "How will it look if the team has Virgin written on their shirts when they get f****d up every other weekend?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sandwich walked into a bar and asked for a pint. The bartender said, "Sorry, we don''t serve food."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first u dont suceed Fuck the world and smoke some weed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I was thinking to myself, how would my life be different if I was born one day earlier. I said nothing would change except I would have asked myself that yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black man dies on Halloween; he is sent to purgatory for a year. On the next Halloween, the man sees angels and God. He asked God if he is going to get wings and become an angel. God says, "No nigga, you are going to be a bat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('cluckedy fuck, place your order Comment from the Editor: This is an extremely stupid joke and I would advise everyone to give it 0 smileys so that we can rid this world of stoners writing jokes!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beans, beans, good for the heart. The more you eat, the more you fart. The more you fart, the better you feel. So eat some beans with every meal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so ugly, the neighborhood kids dressed up as her for Halloween.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old lady was going up and down the halls in a nursing home wearing only a flimsy negligee. As she walked, she would flip up her nightgown at people and say, "Supersex!!" She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping her gown at him, she said, "Supersex." He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, "I''ll take the soup."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to school and learns stuff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde and her brunette friend were listening to music together. The brunette had a few songs the blonde loved and so the brunette offered to burn a CD for her friend. "No, no," the blonde said, "I can burn my own CD" so the brunette lent the blonde the CD and they both went home. The next day the brunette went over to the blonde''s house and saw lots of fire engines and smoke and a smoldering lump where the blonde''s house had been. The blonde was off to the side looking angry. When she saw the brunette she stomped over and asked, "how exactly do you burn your CDs, because I tried using matches and it so did not work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Throwing acid is wrong - in some people''s eyes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know that most jokes about women involve the fact that they are not as "smart" as men and they cannot do two things at once. Nothing could be further from the truth. I have never met a woman, no matter what age, who cannot multi-task, all women can multi-task. They talk and piss you off at the same time!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a very very stupid farmer in Texas. The farmer decided he wanted to raise chickens, so he bought a standard gross of chicks. He planted the chicks in the field, watered them regularly, but nothing happened. He was a persistent type, though, so he bought another gross of chicks and planted them and cared for them - still nothing. Finally he decided he needed professional help, so he wrote a letter to the Texas A & M extension service, explaining exactly what he''d done in detail and asking for their advice. About two weeks later he received a letter from A & M, and read it: "Mr. X, we are unable to diagnose your problem without further information. Please send a soil sample."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a specimen? An Italian astronaut!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a bigamist? A heavy fog in Naples!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s bigotry? What you find in an Italian forest!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To find the inverse of a function, you reverse the process. To find the inverse of putting on your socks and shoes, how do you start? Socks first!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was taking a shower when the doorbell rang, so she put on a towel and answered it. It''s her neighbor Bob. Now, Bob has this huge crush on her, but she''s already married. Bob says to her, "If you drop your towel, I will give you $5,000." She is thinking that she could use the money, so she says yes, drops the towel, gets her money, and pulls her towel back up. Her husband comes along and asks, "Who was that?" She replied that it was Bob. The man saw the money in her hand and said, "Finally, Bob repaid us that $5,000 he owed us!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, she walks out to work in heels and comes back in pumps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a little girl came running into her house yelling, "Mommy, I got five dollars!" The mother was curious, so she asked her child where she got the five dollars from. The little girl replied, "Tommy down the street gave me five dollars for doing cartwheels while he sat in the tree." The mother told her daughter, "Don''t you know that Tommy is just trying to see your undies?" "Ohhhh" said the little girl. The next day the little girl came running into the house yelling, "Mommy, I got ten dollars." The mother asked, "Where did you get the ten dollars from?" The little girl replied, "Tommy down the street gave me ten dollars for doing a cartwheel while he sat up in the tree and laughed." The mother replied, "Didn''t I tell you that he is..." Before the mother could finish, the little girl said, "Wait Mommy; I tricked him, I didn''t wear any undies today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Newfie goes to Toronto to seek his fortune, and after a couple of years is doing very well for himself. His brother calls from Newfoundland to tell him their father is very ill and probably won''t survive. "Well, if he dies I''ll pay for the funeral; the best of everything, spare no expense, just send me the bill," says the Toronto Newfie. Two weeks later he gets a bill in the mail for $7500.00 He sends the cheque off to his brother. The following week he gets a bill for $75.00 He sends the cheque off to his brother. The following week he gets another bill for $75.00 He sends the cheque off to his brother. The following week he gets yet another bill for $75.00 He sends the cheque off to his brother. The following week he gets a bill for $75.00 He calls his brother and says, "What the hell is going on; why do keep get a bill for $75.00 every week?" His brother tells him, "Well, you said spare no expense, so we rented Dad a tux."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Late one night at the insane asylum one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!" Another one said, "How do you know?" The first inmate said, "God told me!" Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did NOT!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Julie lose the race? Because Jodie won!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alabama: It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle. California: Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water. Nebraska: A parent can be arrested if his child cannot hold back a burp during a church service. New Mexico: Females are strictly forbidden to appear unshaven in public. Pennsylvania: A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling. No man may purchase alcohol without written consent from his wife. Tennessee: It is illegal to lasso a catfish in Tennessee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Washington: All lollipops are banned. A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town. In King County, in Seattle Washington, it is illegal to sit on a man''s lap on a metro bus, unless you are married. New York: A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and "looking at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll. Iowa: Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes. Kentucky: By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground." It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Florida: Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner. If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle. Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown. SARASOTA - It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit. Louisiana: It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol. Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault." North Dakota: Beer & pretzels can''t be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant. Ohio: Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vermont: Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each week - on Saturday night. Indiana: Bathing is prohibited during the winter. Citizens are not allowed to attend a movie house or theater nor ride in a public streetcar within at least four hours after eating garlic. Massachusetts: Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches. Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked. An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public. Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts. Kentucky: By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground." It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Connecticut: You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour. You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands. Illinois: It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animal kept as pets. Iowa: Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes. West Virginia: No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions." Oklahoma: Violators can be fined, arrested or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog. Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state. Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property. Vancouver, WA has a city law that requires all motor vehicles to carry anchors... as an emergency brake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband walks into his house with a chicken under his arm and says "Honey I want you to meet the pig I''ve been fucking." Wife looks at him and says "dear, that''s a chicken not a pig!" Husband says "Shut up bitch I wasn''t talking to you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a large seashell collection which I keep scattered all over the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I failed my driver''s test. The guy asked me "What do you do at a red light?" I said, "I don''t know... look around, listen to the radio...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if you''re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As I was coming back from Canada, I stopped at the border and the guy asked, "Do you have any firearms with you?" I answered, "What do you need?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is illegal to have over 16 women live in a house together because that constitutes a brothel. However up to 120 men can live together, without breaking the law. * You may not sing in the bathtub. * Fireworks stores may not sell fireworks to Pennsylvania residents. * Ministers are forbidden from performing marriages when either the bride or groom is drunk. * Motorized vehicles are not to be sold on Sundays. * You may not catch a fish with your hands. * You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth. * Dynamite is not to be used to catch fish. * Though you do not need a fishing license to fish on your own land, but a hunting license is required to hunt on your own land. * All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires. * No one is allowed to sleep on a refrigerator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man runs to the doctor and says, "Doctor, you''ve got to help me. My wife thinks she''s a chicken!" The doctor asks, "How long has she had this condition?" "Two years," says the man. "Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?" asked the shrink. The man shrugs his shoulders and replies, "We needed the eggs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive blonde woman from Kentucky arrived and bet twenty-thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope y''all don''t mind, but I feel much luckier when I''m completely nude." With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!" As the dice came to a stop she jumped up and down and squealed... "YES! YES! I WON, I WON!" She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departed. The dealers stared at each other dumfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I don''t know - I thought you were watching." Moral - Not all Kentuckians are stupid and not all blondes are dumb, but all men are men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, when she put on a pair of Nike''s, it spelled out Nickelodeon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things You Don''t Want to Hear When Regaining Consciousness "Let me ask your opinion, nurse..." "Has anyone ever seen one of THESE?" "What do you mean, "It''s upside down"?" "This is what happens when cousins marry." "You think we can sew it back on?" "Is that SUPPOSED to be yellow?" "What does the AMA know; I still think I can do it." "Wow. Maybe I shouldn''t have gotten so drunk last night." "Does Tab A go into Slot C or Slot F?" "They never let us practice on REAL people in Med school." "Don''t worry, he''ll never know; he''s out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things You Don''t Want to Hear When Regaining Consciousness. "OK, make a wish and pull." "Back in a minute. Gotta put money in the meter." "What he doesn''t know, won''t hurt us." "Tilt that TV a bit. I can''t see the game." "That PROVES aliens have taken over our bodies." "Someone call the janitor - we''re going to need a mop." "I wish I hadn''t forgotten my glasses." "Oh no! I just lost my Rolex." "I learned that when I studied to be a vet." "Poor guy... Maybe we should give him a sex change." "He looks like my ex-wife''s attorney... The one who got her the house, the car, the money... he even got her!..." "C L E A R!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Australian truck driver is looking for a long distance driving job in Adelaide. He gets offered a job driving a load of bowling balls to Darwin. He''s not too keen on this, but he needs the money and so takes off. A while along the highway he sees two Aborigines with a bike, in the middle of nowhere, so he stops and asks if they would like a lift. They say OK. The truck driver says, "All right, hop in, but you''ll have to ride in the back." A 100 km down the road he stops at a truck stop, which amongst other things, involves a load inspection by the local cops. He is asked where he is off to and he says, "Darwin". The cops go round the back, open the doors, slam them shut quickly and rush round desperately to the driver, saying, "For Chrissake get going to Darwin straight away, and don''t stop - two of your eggs have already hatched, and one of them has stolen a bike!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re probably a redneck if.................... During your wedding, when you kissed the bride, your John Deere hat fell off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if you discover an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Several years ago, Baltimore Zoo decided to encamp colonies of tiny Green Monkeys and large Drill Baboons together on an island, the theory being that the primates would stay put because neither could swim. But the morning after the exhibit opened, zoo officials found little Green Monkeys off the island and wandering around the zoo. The next two mornings, it was the same thing. Finally a vigilant keeper discovered the problem stemmed less from cage design than monkey manners. The baboons, unwilling to share food, were grabbing the Green Monkeys by their tails and hurling them like Olympic hammer throwers off the island during suppertime. The monkeys were no worse for their daily shuttle, but the colonies were separated anyway. The island is now a penguin reserve. Swing, swing, swing, *toss* Wheeeeeee! :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A jogger running down a country road is startled as a horse yells at him, "Hey - come over here, buddy." The jogger is stunned but runs over to the fence where the horse is standing and asks, "Were you talking to me?" The horse replies, "Sure was, man. I''ve got a problem. I won the Kentucky Derby a few years ago and this farmer bought me and now all I do is pull a plow and I''m sick of it. Why don''t you run up to the house and offer him $5,000 to buy me. I''ll make you some money cause I can still run." The jogger thought to himself, "Boy, a talking horse." Dollar signs started appearing in his head. So he runs to the house and the old farmer is sitting on the porch. The jogger tells the farmer, "Hey, man, I''ll give you $5,000 for that old broken down nag you''ve got in the field." The farmer replies, "Son, you can''t believe anything that horse says - he''s never even been to Kentucky."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('David Posman, 33, was arrested recently in Providence, Rhode Island, after allegedly knocking out an armored car driver and stealing the closest four bags of money. It turned out they contained $800 in PENNIES, weighed 30 pounds each, and slowed him to a stagger during his getaway so that police officers easily jumped him from behind. 45 year-old Amy Brasher was arrested in San Antonio, Texas, after a mechanic reported to police that 18 packages of marijuana were packed in the engine compartment of the car which she had brought to the mechanic for an oil change. According to police, Brasher later said that she didn''t realize that the mechanic would have to raise the hood to change the oil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Why are you knocking? I''ve got a doorbell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Arkansas, it is illegal to say the word Arkansas incorrectly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is some random advice to make you smile... MEN have 2 heads and WOMEN have 4 lips. The American Dental Association says semen cuts plaque and tartar by 77%. Suck a dick and save a smile... If you have sex 365 times a year, and if you melted down all of the condoms to make a tire, what would you call it? A fuckin Goodyear! Sex is like playing spades. If you don''t have a good partner, you''d better have a good hand. Big Bad Wolf told Little Red Riding Hood to lift her top so he could suck her tits. "No," she said while lifting her skirt, "Eat me like the fuckin book says!" A rooster and a cat were playing by the pool. The cat fell in and the rooster laughed. The rooster exclaimed, "A wet pussy always makes a cock happy!" Girls have unique magic tricks, they get wet without water, bleed without injury, and make boneless things hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harassment: The teacher asked Paco to use "harassment" in a sentence. Paco smiles and says......... "Orale vato (homeboy)...Mi ruca (my girl) caught me in bed with my sancha (lover), pero ( but) that''s okay porque (because) I told her that... HAR ASS MENT nothing to me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a teacher had a taste test with her students. She picked a little boy to do the first test. She blindfolded him, put a Hershey kiss in his mouth and asked, "Do you know what it is?" "No, I don''t," said the little boy. "OK, I''ll give you a clue. It''s the thing your daddy wants from your Mom before he goes to work." Suddenly, a little girl at the back of the room yelled, "Spit it out! It''s a piece of ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Matt''s dad picked him up from school one afternoon. Knowing the parts for the school play were supposed to be posted today, he asked his son if he got a part. Matt enthusiastically announced that he''d gotten a part. "I play a man who''s been married for twenty years." "That''s great, son. Keep up the good work and before you know it they''ll be giving you a speaking part."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rosy, posing thoughtfully in the mirror, says to Nina, "I think I''m going to see a dietitian." Nina asks, "Why?" Rosy answers, "''Cause I need to know once and for all how many calories there are in semen." Nina replies, "I really have no clue, but if you''re swallowing that much of it, no guy is going to care if you''re a little chunky."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Schizophrenia - Do You Hear What I Hear? Multiple Personality Disorder - We Three Kings Disoriented Are. Dementia - I Think I''ll Be Home For Christmas. Narcissistic - Hark The Herald Angels Sing About Me. Manic - Deck The Halls and Walls and Houses and Lawns and Streets and Stores and Offices and Towns and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and... Paranoid - Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me. Borderline Personality - Thoughts Of Roasting On An Open Fire. Personality Disorder - You Better Watch Out, I''m Gonna Cry, I''m Gonna Pout, Maybe I''ll Tell You Why. Obsessive Compulsive - Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle, Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells ..........', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newlywed sailor is informed by the navy that he''s going to be stationed a long way from home on a remote island in the South Pacific for 2 years. A few weeks after he gets there he really starts to miss his new wife, so he writes her a letter. "My darling," he writes, "it looks like we''re going to be apart for a very long time. Already I''m starting to miss you and we''re constantly surrounded by young, attractive native girls. The temptation''s terrible. I need some kind of hobby to keep my mind off them." His wife sends him back a harmonica with a note reading, "Why don''t you learn to play this?" Eventually his tour of duty comes to an end and he rushes back to his wife. "Darling" he says, "I can''t wait to get you into bed so that we can make passionate love!" But she stops him with a wave of her hand. "First, let''s see how well you play that harmonica."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe and Bill are out fishing and sipping beer while discussing football and NASCAR. All of a sudden Joe says, "I think I''m gonna divorce my wife. She hasn''t spoken to me in over 6 months." Bill sips his beer and says, "You better think it over, women like that are hard to find."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if all of your good clothes have come from cases of beer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if at your wedding your tux has a sign on the back that says "sponsored by Bubba''s Chicken and Waffles!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple was arranging for their wedding, and asked the bakery to inscribe the wedding cake with "1 John 4:18" which reads, "There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear." The bakery evidently lost, smudged or otherwise misread the noted reference, and beautifully inscribed on the cake, "John 4:18" "For you have had five husbands, and the man you have now is not your husband."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the river runs red Take the dirt road instead!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man, your mom''s like the UCLA; every year she gets beaten up by a lot of Trojans!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You mom''s soooo stupid, she thought fruit punch was a gay boxer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Walking past a veterinary clinic, a woman noticed a small boy and his dog waiting outside. "Are you here to see Dr. Meyer?" she asked. "Yes," the boy said. "I''m having my dog put in neutral."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We invite grandparents to a special day at our school, culminating in a photo op with grandparent and grandchild posing in front of a colorful display from a history class. Only after the last shot was snapped did we notice what appeared above each grandparent''s head: a banner screaming, "Discover the Ancient World."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Men Are Like Dogs * Both take up too much space on the bed * Both have irrational fears about vacuuming * Neither tells you what''s bothering him * Neither of them notices when you get your hair cut * Neither understands what you see in cats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a trip to see Santa, little Johnny climbed into St. Nick''s lap and shared his wish list. Later that day, in another store, there was Santa again! "And what would you like for Christmas?" he asked little Johnny. Shaking his head, Johnny sighed, "You really need to write these things down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the little pointy-eared boy down in the dumps? He had low elf-esteem. Why does Santa Claus come down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soots him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many elves does it take to change a light bulb? Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to give him a boost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people divorce for good reasons, some for bad. Then there are people who divorce for these reasons: A man from Conneticut filed for divorce because his wife left him a note on the refrigerator that read "I won''t be home when you return from work. Have gone to the bridge club. There''ll be a recipe for your dinner at seven o''clock on Channel 2." A housewife filed for divorce on the grounds that her husband was having an affair. The woman became suspicious when every time the phone rang, her myna bird spouted things like "Divorce," "I love you" and "Be patient."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the first day of her vacation, a woman fell and broke her leg. As the doctor examined her, she moaned, "Why couldn''t this have happened on my last day of skiing?" He looked up. "This IS your last day of skiing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bicyclist came whizzing down a steep hill and smashed into a car as I stood there watching in horror. I ran over to see if I could help and discovered the wild rider was a friend of mine, an attorney. I knew he was going to be just fine when the first words out of his mouth were, "Did the driver admit he was at fault?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When she put on makeup it''s just like water, comes straight off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some members of a health club were having their first meeting. The director of the group said, "Now, I''d like each of you to give the facts of your daily routine." Several people spoke, admitting their excesses, and then one obviously overweight member said, "I eat moderately, I drink moderately, and I exercise frequently." "Hmm?" said the manager. "And are you sure there is nothing you over-indulge in?" "Well," said the man, "I lie extensively."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('HOW DO PEOPLE IN LOVE TYPICALLY BEHAVE? "When a person gets kissed for the first time, they fall down and they don''t get up for at least an hour." Wendy, age 8. "Mooshy...like puppy dogs...except puppy dogs don''t wag their tails nearly as much." Arnold, age 10. "All of a sudden, the people get movies fever so they can sit together in the dark." Shem, age 8. CONCERNING WHY LOVE HAPPENS BETWEEN TWO PARTICULAR PEOPLE "One of the people has freckles and so he finds somebody else who has freckles too." Andrew, age 6. ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE "Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life." John, age 9. REFLECTIONS ON THE NATURE OF LOVE "Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too." Greg, age 8. CONCERNING WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS "They are just practicing for when they might have to walk down the aisle some day and do the holy matchimony thing." John, age 9.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Signs of Aging Everything hurts and what doesn''t hurt, doesn''t work. You feel like the morning after, and you haven''t been anywhere. Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D. You get winded playing chess. You''re still chasing women but can''t remember why. You look forward to a dull evening. Your favorite part of the newspaper is "25 Years Ago Today..." You turn out the light for economic reasons rather than romantic ones. You sit in a rocking chair and can''t get it going. Your knees buckle, but your belt won''t. You regret all those mistakes resisting temptation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Signs of Aging You just can''t stand people who are intolerant. The best part of your day is over when your alarm clock goes off. You burn the midnight oil until 9 pm. Your pacemaker makes the garage door go up when you watch a pretty girl go by. The little grey haired lady you help across the street is your wife. You have too much room in the house and not enough room in the medicine cabinet. The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals. Your children begin to look middle-aged. You''ve finally reached the top of the ladder only to find it''s leaning against the wrong wall. Your mind makes contracts your body can''t keep. You''re 17 around the neck, 42 around the waist, and 96 around the golf course.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE "I''m in favor of love as long as it doesn''t happen when ''Dinosaurs'' is on television." Jill, age 6. "Love is foolish.....but I might try it sometime." Floyd, age 9. "Yesterday I kissed a girl in a private place...we were behind a tree." Carey, age 7. THE PERSONAL QUALITIES YOU NEED TO HAVE IN ORDER TO BE A GOOD LOVER "Sensitivity don''t hurt." Robbie, age 8. SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU "Shake your hips and hope for the best." Camille, age 9. "Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs...and don''t worry if their parents are right there." Manuel, age 8. HOW CAN YOU TELL IF ADULTS EATING DINNER IN A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE? "Romantic adults are usually all dressed up, so if they are just wearing jeans it might mean they used to go out or they just broke up." Sarah, age 9. "See if the man has lipstick on his face." Sandra, age 7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to eat natural foods, but then I found out that 65% of all people die of natural causes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Harold was practicing the violin in the living room while his father was trying to read in the den. The family dog was lying in the den, and as the screeching sounds of little Harold''s violin reached his ears, he began to howl loudly. The father listened to the dog and the violin as long as he could. Then he jumped up, slammed his paper to the floor and yelled above the noise, "For pity''s sake, can''t you play something the dog doesn''t know?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sadly I will never be able to join a nudist colony..=[ My mother always told me not to point!! =]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story. Last year my teachers all believed in the, "There is no stupid question" thing, until we started talking about a three day trip our class was going to take. We had just finished talking about room arrangements. My teacher asked for any questions, stating his famous line, "There are no stupid questions." A girl raised her hand and asked, "Are guys allowed to bunk with us?" He now has a new fave line, "There are no stupid questions, just stupid people."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a court clerk, I am well-versed in the jury-selection process. First a computer randomly selects a few hundred citizens from the entire county to report for jury duty on a particular day. Then another computer assigns 40 of those present to a courtroom. Then the 40 names are placed in a drum, and a dozen names are pulled. During jury selection for one trial, the judge asked potential Juror No. 1 if there was any reason he could not be a fair and impartial juror. "There may be," he replied. "Juror No. 12 is my ex-wife, and if we were on the same jury, I guarantee we would not be able to agree on anything." Both were excused.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The musician Ted Nugent was being interviewed by a British radio show, and the liberal presenter was giving him a hard time about being a deer hunter. "What do you think is going through that deer''s head when you kill it?" she asks. "Don''t you think it is wondering what it ever did to harm you, and why you are being so cruel?" "No," replied Nugent, "I don''t think their thoughts are that complex. A deer only wonders when it will eat next, when it will have sex next, and if it is fast enough to run away from whoever would harm it. In that way, they really aren''t much different from the French."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe is sitting on a train across from a busty blonde wearing a very tiny mini skirt. Despite his efforts he can''t stop looking at her thighs. To his delight he discovers that she is wearing no underwear. The blonde suddenly notices that he is looking and asks, "Are you looking at my p*ssy?" "Yes, I am so sorry! I just couldn''t help myself. I will stop right away." After a while he starts to look again. "Are you looking again?" the blonde asks. "I am so sorry, I just can''t stop!" he says. "Oh, it''s okay. It''s quite talented, watch!" the blonde says. As the man is watching it blows a kiss at him! "What else can it do?" he asks. "It can also wink at you," she says. The man stares in disbelief as it winks at him. "Come and sit next to me." As the man sits down she asks him if he would like to stick two fingers in it? Then the man says, "Why, can it whistle too?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if a family tree is a redneck''s? The family tree goes straight down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so old, she doesn''t need a history book.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the last thing NASA heard before apollo 13 crashed? Let her drive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Policeman: "Lady, I''m arresting you for prostitution." Woman: "I''m not selling sex, I''m selling condoms with a free demonstration."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a big animal that is big.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. how long does it take for a man to change a lightbulb? A. 5 mins. 20 secs. 1 min to get a lightbulb 1 min to try and change it 1 min to swear because he can''t do it 1 min to find a woman 20 secs. for her to change it 1 min for him to cry and gripe about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy had told all of his friends about the great steak he''d eaten downtown the day before. A group of them decided to head down and see if it was really as large and delicious as he was making it out to be. The group was seated in the back of the restaurant. After looking over the menu, they ordered and waited, hungrily, for their large, delicious, gigantic steaks. To their collective disappointment, the waiter brought out some of the smallest steaks they''d ever seen. "Now see here," the very embarrassed guy said to the waiter. "Yesterday, when I came down here you served me a big, juicy steak. Today, though, when I have my friends with me, you serve tiny steaks! What is the meaning of this?" "Yes, sir," replied the waiter, "yesterday you were sitting by the window."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear God, If we come back as something, please don''t let me be Jennifer Horton because I hate her. Denise Dear God, You don''t have to worry about me. I always look both ways. Dean Dear God, I think about You sometimes even when I''m not praying. Elliot Dear God, Of all the people who work for You, I like Noah and David the best. Rob Dear God, My brother told me about being born but it doesn''t sound right. They''re just kidding, aren''t they? Marsha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear God, The bad people laughed at Noah - "You made an ark on dry land, you fool". But he was smart, he stuck with You. That''s what I would do. Eddie Dear God, I do not think anybody could be a better God. Well, I just want You to know but I am not just saying that because You are God already. Charles Dear God, I didn''t think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset You made on Tuesday. That was cool! Eugene Dear God, In Sunday School they told us what You do. Who does it when You are on vacation? Jane Dear God, I read the Bible. What does begat mean? Nobody will tell me. Love, Allison Dear God, Are you really invisible or is that a trick? Lucy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than 10 babies in one dumpster? 1 baby in 10 dumpsters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a Michigan State Player out of your yard? Set up a goal post.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('byuuyntfifgjrfnbrft9tn ...told you so.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse an Irishman? Line 4 shovels up against a wall and tell him to take his pick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Irish people jump on the bartender? He said, "The drinks are on me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? A policeman. What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill? Jailbreak. There is a Mexican, a French, a Italian, and an American. Their boat was getting too heavy so they decided to throw off some cargo. The Frenchmen tossed off a bottle of wine. All the others yelled, "What are you doing?" He replied, "We have too many of these in our country." Next, the Italian threw off a pizza. All the others yelled, "What are you doing?" He replied, "We got too many of these in our country." After that the Mexican threw off a bunch of tacos. All the others yelled, "What are you doing?" He replied, "We have too many of these in our country." Finally, the American had a turn to throw of some cargo. He threw off the Mexican. All the others yelled, "What are you doing?" He replied, "We have too many of those in our country."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl went into the barber shop to get a haircut. When the barber was cutting her hair he realized she was eating a little debbie snack. He said, "Sweetie, you''re going to get hair on your twinkie." The little girl answered, "I know, and I''m going to get boobs, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant woman was taking a shower and her three year old daughter said,"Mommy, you''re getting fat!"And the mother replied,"That because a baby is growing in my tummy."To which the daughter said,"Yeah,but what''s growing in you butt?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men were engineers checking a bridge when out of nowhere this masked man pointed a gun at them and said ,"If you want to live,you''ll jump off the bridge and you''ll survive."Well,the gunman turned around to take his mask off and when he turned around the engineers saw it was a construction worker."April Fools!"he yelled out as water shot out from the"gun".The first engineer looked at him and said,"Tell that to the man who jumped when you had turned around."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Do you have any corn?" and the bartender says, "No, we only sell beer." The next day the man walks into the bar again and asks for corn but this time the bartender says, "Hey, you are the guy that asked for corn yesterday? If you ask for corn one more time i will nail you to the wall!" The next day the man goes into the bar again and asks, "Do you have any nails?" and the bartender says, "No," so the man says, "Do you have any corn?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there were 3 children that were sent to the head of the school''s office. Their names were Fly, Dick and Piss. When they got there, no one was there so Fly hid on the desk, Dick hid under the desk and Piss started to jump around. When the head of the school got there he said "Fly down, Dick up and Piss on the floor!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FLATTERY - What your kid does when they want something. EAT VEGETABLES - What your kid does when they want dessert. Usually. BEG, CRY, or WHINE - What your kid does when they want something you don''t want to give them. CALL - What your kid does when they get a good grade. "FORGET" TO CALL - What your kid does when they do NOT get a good grade. BRUSH TEETH - What your kid promises to do so you will let them eat candy. And then they forget. DRINK MILK - What your kid does after they heat it up and add hot chocolate powder. SPILL WATER - What your kid does when they want to drink soda instead. DROP THEIR LUNCH - What your kid does when they don''t like what you made for them. PRETEND TO SLEEP - What your kid does when they don''t want to talk. READ - What your kid does when you buy them a new comic book. DO HOMEWORK - What your kid does only when you yell at them. USE THE COMPUTER - What your kid does, all the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a fun way to irritate your friends and family on your answering machine! On your answering machine - "Hello?" pause, "What''s up?" pause again, "Oh, well you must feel pretty stupid right now because you''re talking to my answering machine! So leave a message!" Beep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four-year-old Robert tells his kindergarten teacher that he has a new baby brother, called Spot. "Spot?" says the teacher. "Are you sure it''s not a puppy your Dad bought you?" Robert was adamant that his brother''s name was Spot - until next morning, when he issued a correction. "Actually, it''s Mark."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Speak your mind out when you''re angry. You''ll make the best speech you''ll ever live to regret.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Madame. Madame who? Madame foot is stuck in the door!! (My damn foot is stuck in the door.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Cows. Cows who? No, owls hoo, cows moo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly when i punch her she looks better than before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that when I take a picture of her and hang it on the wall, it still falls down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Margie say about her brain surgeon? "I really gave him a piece of my mind!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you look out for a pig that knows karate? It might give you a pork chop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Movie stars are a reel treat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Alfo make a quart of juice from 3 oranges? It was a tight squeeze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at the guy in the middle, shouting, "Your mom''s the best lay in town." Everyone expects a fight, but the guy ignores him and the drunk wanders off and stands at the far end of the bar. Ten minutes later, the drunk comes back, points to the same guy, and says, "I just screwed your mom, and it was swe-e-et!" Again the guy refuses to take the bait, and the drunk wanders off. Ten minutes later he comes back and announces, "Your mom even let me..." Finally the guy interrupts: "Go home Dad, you''re drunk!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This old couple is ready to go to sleep so the old man lays on the bed but the old woman lays on the floor. The old man asks, "Why are you going to sleep on the floor?" The old woman says, "Because I want to feel something hard for a change."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s more fun to color outside the lines. If you''re gonna draw on the wall, do it behind the couch. Ask why until you understand. Even if you''ve been fishing for 3 hours and haven''t gotten anything except poison ivy and a sunburn, you''re still better off than the worm. Make up the rules as you go along. It doesn''t matter who started it. Ask for sprinkles. If the horse you''re drawing looks more like a dog, make it a dog. Save a place in line for your friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes you have to take the test before you''ve finished studying. If you want a kitten, start out asking for a horse. Picking your nose when no one else is looking is still picking your nose. Just keep banging until someone opens the door. Making your bed is a waste of time. There is no good reason why clothes have to match. Even Popeye didn''t eat his spinach until he absolutely had to. You work so hard pedalling up the hill that you hate to brake on the way down. You can''t ask to start over just because you''re losing the game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Clinton, Alabama, it is illegal to molest your automobile. Now how would you go about doing that? And how would your automobile testify against you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when the post office burns down? A case of black mail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) In Illinois, it is illegal to speak English. Well then, what do they speak? Gibberish? 2) In Crete, Illinois, it is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with someone else''s dog. First of all, why would anybody attempt to even have sex with a dog? Second of all, is it okay to attempt to have sex with your own dog? And finally, my favorite one of all. . . 3)In New York, the penalty for jumping off a building is death. Duh! No, we''re all going to magically survive a 50 story drop to the concrete below.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Gorillas Sleep on in fruit orchards? Apricots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Tommy run around the school track 98 times every day? He has a run track mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a rodeo star get around? With a cattle-act.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened when Ray Johnson fell off the Empire State Building? Now everyone calls him x-ray.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Quiz Show give away $10,000 plus one banana? They wanted the prize to have appeal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman''s guide to sex: Lay there and pretend to enjoy the experience and when it is done tell your partner it was the best you ever had. Man''s guide to sex" In, Out repeat if necessary!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple are getting married in a big fancy church with all of the relatives and friends in attendance. The priest is going through the nomal procedure and when he comes to the part "If anyone objects to the union of these two people in Holy Matrimony let them speak now or for ever hold their peace". A redneck in the back row jumps up and hollers "I object, I am in love with her and she''s carrying my baby!" As the gathering gasps in surprise the redneck runs up the aisle, shoves the groom aside and rips off the brides veil. After a moment of silence the redneck exclaims, "Hey you ain''t my sister!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? John: You told me to do it without using tables. __________________________________________ Teacher: Glen, why do you always get so dirty? Glen: Well, I''m a lot closer to the ground than you are. _______________________________________ Teacher: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? Simon: No sir, I don''t have to, my Mom is a good cook. ______________________________ Teacher: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother''s. Did you copy his? Clyde: No, teacher, it''s the same dog. ___________________________________ Teacher: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? Harold: A teacher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me I''m going in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two gay guys are having sex. The penis says to the asshole "you think you have it bad, I''m up to my nuts in shit over here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After everything I say I want you to say "I am a Man." You go to a bar. I am a man You see a girl and go meet her I am a man You take her home I am a man You get in bed with her I am a man She whispers in you ear I am a man (This is very funny when saying it out loud with a friend. Instruct them to say "I am a man." after each line you say.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the butcher introduce his wife Meat Patty', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday a pastor asked his congregation to consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns. After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed that someone had contributed a $1,000 bill. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation, and said he''d like to personally thank the person who had placed the money in the plate. A very quiet, elderly, saintly widow shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front. Slowly she made her way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much and asked her to pick out three hymns. Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the three handsomest men in the building and said, "I''ll take him and him and him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is like a TV; Even a 4 year old could turn her on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so poor she found a ciagarette on the ground and said, "Honey, we got a fire tonight!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde and her boyfriend went to a car store. He asks her what car she wants but she says, "I dunno." So he takes her around to all the car shops and she says, "I want the BMW." He asks her why she wants a BMW and she says, "Because I dunno how to spell the other brands!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are not as stupid as you look. That would be impossible.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What shall we play today? Cori asked her best friend Judy. "Let''s play ''school''!" said Judy. "Okay," said Cori, "But I''m going to be absent."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette have been fighting for over an hour about the sun. The brunette yells,"THE SUN IS A STAR!!!" The blonde yells,"NO IT''S EVERYONE IN THE WORLD''S FARTS!" The brunette says to the blonde,"Girl, you couldn''t play any stupider!" Shocked, the blonde says in reply,"Who''s playing?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old, she was at the afterparty when Moses brought down the Ten Commandments.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid, when Moses brought down the Ten Commandments, she said, "Where''s the ketchup?" HINT:commandments condiments', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy comes walking out of a store carrying a big grandfather''s clock. A drunk man bumps into him and the guy drops the clock and smashes it all to hell. The guy says, "Why don''t you watch where you''re going?" and the drunk says, "Why don''t you carry a wrist watch like everybody else?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so ugly, she walks down the street and a little boy says,"look Mommy, there''s Shrek!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sixty is the worst age to be, said the 60 year-old man. "You always feel like you have to pee and most of the time you stand there and nothing happens." "Ah, that''s nothin," said the 70-year-old. "When you''re seventy, you don''t have a bowel movement any more. You take laxatives, eat bran, sit on the toilet all day and nothing happens." "Actually," said the 80-year-old, "Eighty is the worst age of all." "Do you have trouble peeing, too?" asked the 60-year old. "No, I pee every morning at 6:00. I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock; no problem at all." "So, do you have a problem with your bowel movement?" "No, I have one every morning at 6:30." Exasperated, the 60-year-old said, "You pee every morning at 6:00 and crap every morning at 6:30. So what''s so bad about being 80?" "I don''t wake up till 7:00."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked the Lord to tell me Why my house is such a mess. He asked if I''d been ''computering'', And I had to answer, "yes." He told me to get off my fanny And tidy up the house. And so I started cleaning up... The smudges off my mouse. I wiped and shone the topside. That really did the trick... I was just admiring my work... I didn''t mean to ''click.'' But click, I did, and oops I found A real absorbing site That I got SO way into... I was into it all night.<<Sigh>> Nothing''s changed except my mouse It''s very, very shiny. I guess my house will stay a mess... While I sit here on my hiney.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few decades from now, George Bush will die (everyone dies eventually). He goes up to Heaven where he sees a bunch of clocks, and he asks God what the clocks do. "These clocks go forward one minute each time the person tells a lie." Bush looks for his clock. "Where''s mine?" "Oh, that one? I use that as a ceiling fan." "WHAT?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy in a restaurant says to the waitress, "I want a cup of coffee without cream." The waitress comes back a few minutes later and says, "I''m sorry, but we''re all out of cream. Would you mind taking your coffee without milk?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An eight year old girl tried checking a book out of the library, entitled ''Advice for Young Mothers''. The librarian, being a typically nosey and puritanical librarian, asked, "Why do you want to check out this particular book, dear?" The little girl replied, "Because I collect moths."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, 3 men were walking around in the desert. One was poor, but had lots to drink and was smart; one was rich and very thirsty but was smart, and the last was poor, thirsty and stupid. Suddenly a genie popped up and said, "Each of you can have one wish, but it is a different sort of wish to the usual. Each of you can go down this magic slide," and a slide appeared from nowhere, "and whatever you say in the slide you will land in a large pile of whatever you said." The first man went down and said, "GOLD," and he landed in gold; the second man said, "COCA-COLA," and he landed in coca-cola; the last man said, "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" and he landed in wee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to Italy to attend a two week, company training session. Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her a good trip. The wife answers, "Thank you hon, what would like me to bring for you?" The husband laughs and says, "An Italian girl." The woman kept quiet and left. Two weeks later he picks her up at the airport and asks, "So, hon, how was the trip?" "Very good, thank you." "And what happened to my present?" "What present?" she asked "The one I asked for - an Italian girl!" "Oh, that," she said. "Well, I did what I could, now we''ll have to wait for nine months to see if it''s a girl!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beaverton, OR- You must buy a $10 permit to be allowed to install a burglar alarm. Portland, OR- People may not whistle underwater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fool and his money are soon partying.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When does running mean walking? When you''re running out of gas!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call Asians swimming in a pool? A. Cornflakes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time may fly, but does it have wings?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Russian leaders does it take to change a lightbulb? We don''t know. Russian leaders don''t last as long as lightbulbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so ugly, that when she was born the doctor smacked her butt and his hand melted!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Conserve water. Shower with a friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('y''know, they made a movie about me once. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. "Oops." "Is that thing called a lung?" "And my mom wanted me to help people." "Shoot! That''s the third pair of tongs this week!" "I can''t pull it out!" "This belongs on MTV." "No one asked for your opinion." "It''s a boy!" "Hey! I can see the operating table!" "Brilliant. Now what?" "I need a lawyer." "What have you been eating?!" "This is all a dream...this is all a dream..." "Mommy!" "Fire in the hole!" "I knew I should''ve stopped drinking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a little teapot, short and stout. "I have whooping cough!" "Where did my bandage go?" "I think I''m going to puke." "I can compare myself to Rachel Ray! NOT!" "If I mess up one more time, I''m turning this blade on you." "I summon up my Eighth Amendment Right!" "I wanted to be an executioner!" "Burp!" "I just live here." "What color the meat is, I don''t care! I''m not even wearing any underwear!" "Man, this place just stunk up bad." "You want fries with that?" "Johnny, my meat is on fire!" "Surreal."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two farmers were boasting about the strongest wind they''d ever experienced. "Out here in California," said one, "I''ve seen the fiercest wind in my life. You know those giant redwoods trees? Well the wind got so strong it bent them right over." "That''s nothing," said the farmer from Iowa. "Back on my farm we had a wind one day that blew a hundred miles per hour. It was so bad that one of my hens had her back turned to the wind and laid the same egg six times!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she sank Atlantis!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes over to her married son''s house and walks in to find her daughter-in-law sitting in a chair, entirely nude. The mother-in-law says, "What the hell are you doing?" "I''m wearing my love dress," responds the daughter-in-law, "We haven''t made love in a long time." So the mother-in-law says, "Hm, maybe I should try that." She goes home to find her husband is not in, so she gets undressed. Two hours go by and finally she hears her husband''s car. He walks in the front door and says, "What the hell are you doing?" "I''m wearing my love dress," says the wife. "Well," responds the husband, "it needs to be ironed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Im not on my period... I just dont like you :P', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What if there were no hypothetical situations?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can pick your friends, You can pick your nose; But you cant pick your friends nose.... What true words....!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During class, the chemistry professor was demonstrating the properties of various acids. "Now I''m dropping this silver coin into this glass of acid. Will it dissolve?" "No, sir," a student called out. "No?" queried the professor. "Perhaps you can explain why the silver coin won''t dissolve." "Because if it would, you wouldn''t have dropped it in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparatus is a fancy word for thingy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Cleveland, Ohio, it''s illegal to catch mice without a hunting license. Dr. Seuss coined the word "nerd" in his 1950 book "If I Ran the Zoo." It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather for a year''s supply of footballs. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married. There are an average of 178 sesame seeds on a McDonald''s Big Mac bun. The world''s termites outweigh the world''s humans 10 to 1. Pound for pound, hamburgers cost more than new cars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Heinz ketchup leaves the bottle, it travels at a rate of 25 miles per year. The Bible has been translated into Klingon. Ten percent of the Russian government''s income comes from the sale of vodka. On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year. In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world''s nuclear weapons combined. Reno, Nevada is west of Los Angeles, California. Average lifespan of a major league baseball: 5 pitches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Elephants can''t jump. Every other mammal can. Internationally, Baywatch is the most popular TV show in history. Five Jell-O flavors that flopped: celery, coffee, cola, apple, and chocolate. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match. Humans are the only primates that don''t have pigment in the palms of their hands. The 3 most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca-Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Age 6 - I''ve learned that if you spread the peas out on your plate, it looks like you ate more. Age 8 - I''ve learned that if you laugh and drink soda pop at the same time, it will come out your nose. Age 10 - I''ve learned that you should never jump out of a second story window using a sheet for a parachute. Age 11 - I''ve learned that if you want to get even with someone at camp, you rub their underwear in poison ivy. Age 13 - I''ve learned that just when I get my room the way I like it, Mom makes me clean it up. Age 16 - I''ve learned that when my parents are in a bad mood, it''s best to agree to everything they say or things get nasty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Age 27 - I''ve learned that I should never praise my mother''s cooking when I''m eating something fixed by my wife. Age 30 - I''ve learned that motel mattresses are better on the side away from the phone. Age 31 - I''ve learned that nothing really bad happens when you tear those little "do not remove" tags from pillows. Age 42 - I''ve learned that marrying for money is the hardest way of getting it. Age 52 - I''ve learned that if you like garlic salt and Tabasco sauce you can make almost anything taste good. Age 53 - I''ve learned that after age 50 you get the furniture disease. That''s when your chest falls into your drawers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day the same old thing Essays, reading, handwriting I do it all while sitting here With a very tempting computer near. I try to ignore the silent plea "Please, surf the net on me" I, for a while I ignore the call By writing a paper on the Taj Mahal. But inevitably It gets to me I shove my work out of the way (Don''t worry I''ll do it another day). The screen savers gone when I click on the mouse A happy blue glow fills up the house I open the Internet, "Whoopitydee" I yell (there are 5 new emails for me). When I''ve replied I surf the net Is there anything exciting? You bet! I''ll do this while the sun fades away Marking the end of another long day But I will not notice, oh no not me I''ll be too wrapped up in my computer you see.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas and a hurricane in Florida have in common? Somebody''s fixin'' to lose them a house trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second. A dime has 118 ridges around the edge. A cat has 32 muscles in each ear. A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours. A goldfish has a memory span of 3 seconds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A shark is the only animal that can blink both eyes. A snail can sleep for three years. A crocodile cannot move its tongue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Babies are born without kneecaps. They don''t appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years old. Butterflies taste with there feet. Cats have over 100 vocal cords. Dogs have about 10. February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon. In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the population of China walked past you, in a single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction. If you are an average American, in your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at a red light. Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our eyes are always the same from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite. Rubber Bands last longer when refrigerated. "Lollipop" is the longest word typed with only the right hand. The average person''s left hand does 56% of the typing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Bible does not say there were three wise men; it only says there were three gifts. The cruise liner, QE2, moves only 6 in. for each gallon of diesel that if burns. The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter in the alphabet. The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid. The words ''racecar'' ''kayak'' ''level'' and ''radar'' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left. (palindromes)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar. There are more chickens than people in the world. There''s no Betty Rubble in the Flintstones Chewable Vitamins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women blink nearly twice as much as men. Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest its self. The largest fish is the whale shark-it can be over 50 feet long and weigh 2 tons. The only continent without native reptiles or snakes is Antarctica.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mosquitoes have 47 teeth. An ant can lift 50 times its own weight. Holland is the only country with a national dog. The first penny had the motto "mind your own business. Before mercury, brandy was used to fill thermometers. Chinese is the most commonly spoken language in the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In 1634, tulip bulbs were a form of currency in Holland. A male kangaroo is called a boomer. Penguins have an organ above their eyes that converts sea water to fresh water. Bamboo makes up 99% of a panda''s diet. The first human-made object to break the sound barrier was a whip. Beavers were once the size of bears. The first ballpoint pens were sold in 1945 for $12.00 each.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Antarctica is the driest, coldest, windiest and highest continent on earth. Panama is the only place in the world that you can see the sun rise on the Pacific and set on the Atlantic. The only lighthouse to use electricity was the Statue of Liberty. A honey bee can fly up to 15 m.p.h.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hawaii is the only U.S. state not to report a temperature of 0f* or below. Kangaroos can jump 30 ft. The first bike was called a hobbyhorse. A hummingbird weighs less than a penny. The smallest county in America is New York County, better known as Manhattan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A single coffee tree produces only about a pound of coffee beans a year. The only bird that can swim but not fly is the penguin. The tallest man was 8''11" The first vacuum was so large; it was brought to a house by horse. A female kangaroo is called a flyer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The average human produces about 10,000 gallons of saliva in a lifetime. Until the nineteenth century, solid blocks of tea were used as money in Siberia. Americans spend more than $630 million a year on golf balls. You must play ping-pong for 12 hours to lose a pound. The life span of a taste bud is ten days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2,500 left handers die each year using products designed for right handers. Most people hear better with their right ear. Animals that lay eggs don''t have belly buttons. Honey bees are the only insects that create a form of food for humans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first TV remote control, introduced in 1950, was called Lazy Bones. Lemon sharks can give birth to about 36 babies at one time. The top of the Empire State Building was originally built as a place to anchor blimps. The area code in Cape Canaveral, Fl, is 321.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baboons were once trained by Egyptians to wait on tables. A queen bee can lay 800-1500 eggs per day. The Popsicle was invented in 1905 by an 11-year-old boy. "Disco" means "I learn" in Latin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first TV network kids show in the U.S. was "Captain Kangaroo." Before 1687 clocks were made with only an hour hand. There are towns named Sandwich in Illinois and Massachusetts. Caterpillars have over 2,000 muscles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first typewriter was called the "literary piano." Frogs can''t swallow with their eyes open. A duck''s quack doesn''t echo. August has the highest percentage of births.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you Drive on the Parkway but Park on the Driveway?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear was bought from a Russian circus by a tourist agent after he was asked to provide an American visitor with a "wild bear hunt". The tourist was taken to the Perdelkino Forest near Moscow and when all was ready, the bear was released. As the hunter closed in on his prey, a postman passed by on his bike, saw the bear, and tumbled off in surprise. Recalling his Big Top training, the bear grabbed the bike and pedalled off, leaving the American to sue for fraud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In February 1993 a train knocked down and injured an elephant calf in the Sylhet region of Bangladesh. When the next train came along an hour later the calf''s mother blocked the track, then banged her forehead against the engine for 15 minutes, until it could no longer run. Then she walked off into the jungle again, leaving about 200 passengers stranded for over five hours. A man driving to work through the southern desert of Saudi Arabia ran over one of a troupe of monkeys. When he made the return trip later that day, the remaining monkeys were waiting for him. They spotted his car, jumped on it, and smashed the windows with their fists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign in a realtor''s office: "Lots for little." Sign at entrance of the IRS: "Watch your step." Sign in a bookstore: "We treat you write." Sign on a front door: "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog." Sign on a parking space at a garden nursery: "Reserved for plant manager." Sign on a door to a psychiatric ward: "Please do not disturb further." Sign for a litter of dachshund pups: "Get a long little doggie!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign on the inside of a bathroom stall: "Beware of limbo dancers." A hardware store in Oregon has a sign that reads: "Today''s special." Below, it says: "So''s tomorrow." Sign in school: "In case of atomic attack, the federal ruling concerning prayer in this building will be temporarily suspended." Sign seen on an electricity pylon: "DANGER! To touch these wires will result in instant death. Anyone found doing so will be severely prosecuted." Sign at a garage in Hertfordshire: "Please do not smoke near the pumps. If your life isn''t worth anything, gas is!" Sign seen in the vicinity of Victoria Station: "Closed for official opening."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims! What are the feathers on a turkey''s wings called? Turkey feathers. Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building? Yes - a building can''t jump at all. Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had the drumsticks. Where did the first corn come from? The stalk brought it. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, that when she went to the doctor, he did an ultrasound test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a six year old blonde came up to her mother and said: "When I grow up, I want to be a Hillary Duff, she''s amazing!" lol, only a blonde would say that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Mr. Dorren''s first grade class was learning the alphabet. One of his students came up to Mr. Dorren and asked to go to the bathroom. Mr. Dorren said, "First, recite the alphabet." The student started, "A, B... ... L, M, N, O, Q..." When he finished, Mr. Dorren asked, "Where''s the ''P''?" "Running down my legs." replied the student.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and sees a blond cowboy coming down the walk with nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun and his boots So the sheriff arrests him for indecent exposure. As he is locking him up he asks, "Why in the world are you dressed like this?" Cowboy: "Well, it''s like this, Sheriff. I was in the bar down the road and this pretty little redhead asks me to go out to her motor home with her, and I did. We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to pull off my shirt, so I did. Then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off my pants, so I did. Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off my shorts, so I did. Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of funny and says, "Now go to town cowboy...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do men and sperm have in common? They both have a one in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the other side! Why did the Mexican Chicken cross the Border? To get to the U.S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy walked into a petshop and went up to a clerk. The boy asked if she had dachshunds in the store. The clerk said yes, and she went and got the dog out of the cage and handed it to him. He got all excited when he held it and immediately went to the checkout and gave the clerk a check for $100, that he said was his birthday money. He was so excited and anxious that the clerk asked why he wanted that dog so much, and not a big dog like most boys got when they came in. He replied, "I''ve always wanted to be a cowboy and now I can, because the song says ''Get along little dogie!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a atheist and his son dicussing religion. The young man later brought up the discussion with his friends, who explained to him the concept on the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. That day the man went home and told his father that there were three gods and explained to him what his friends had said. The father stared at his son and said, "No, son, there is only one god, and we don''t believe in him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An angel appears at a faculty meeting and tells the history teacher that in return for his unselfish and exemplary behavior, the Lord will reward him with his choice of infinite wealth, wisdom, or beauty. Without hesitating, the history teacher selects infinite wisdom. "Done!" says the angel, and disappears in a cloud of smoke and a bolt of lightning. Now, all heads turn toward the history teacher, who sits surrounded by a faint halo of light. One of his colleagues whispers, "Say something." The history teacher sighs and says, "I should have taken the money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The old pastor made it to a practice to visit the parish school one day a week. He walked into the 4th grade class, where the children were studying the states, and asked them how many states they could name. They came up with about 40 names. He jokingly told them that in his day students knew the names of all the states. One lad raised his hand and said, "Yes, but in those days there were only 13."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A class professor was giving a lecture on company slogans and was asking his students if they were familiar with them. "Justin," he asked, "which company has the slogan, ''come fly the friendly skies''?" Justin answered the correct airline. "Sandra, can you tell me which company has the slogan, "Don''t leave home without it?" Sandra answered the correct credit card company with no difficulty. "Now Allison, Tell me which company bears the slogan, ''Just do it''?" And Allison answered, "Mom..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A medieval astrologer prophesied to a king that his favorite mistress would soon die. Sure enough, the woman died a short time later. The king was outraged at the astrologer, certain that his prophecy had brought about the woman''s death. He summoned the astrologer and commanded him, "Tell me when you will die!" The astrologer realized that the king was planning to kill him immediately, no matter what answer he gave. "I do not know when I will die," he answered finally. "I only know that when I die, you will die two days later."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Little Johnny and his family went for a walk they saw two dogs having sex, girl on top of boy. Johnny didn''t know much about sex, so his parents didn''t say anything. Later that night, Johnny''s parents were having sex and Johnny walked in on them. Before his parent''s could say anything, Johnny yelled out, "Mom get on top of dad. Hurry, because I want a puppy!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Steve, Bob, and Jeff were working on a very high scaffolding. Suddenly, Steve falls 50 feet to the ground below and he is killed instantly. After the coroner leaves with Steve''s body, Bob volunteers to inform Steve''s wife of the terrible news. Some two hours later, Bob returns to the work site with a six-pack of beer under his arms. "Say, Bob, where did you get the six-pack?" "Steve''s wife gave it to me!" "What! You just told her that Steve died and she gave you a six-pack?" "Well, before I broke the news to her, I asked her if she was Steve''s widow. She said she wasn''t, so I said I''d bet her a six-pack she was!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Mexican with a vasectomy? A dry Martinez.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If there is H2O on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside? K9P.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What goes oh oh oh? Santa walking backwards', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make the number 1 disappear? Add a "g" to it and it''s "gone"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the barber cut the moon''s hair? E-clipse it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blond cross the road? I don''t know. Neither did he.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who went shopping for lip-gloss just so she could pass the make-up exam?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady named Annala had 4 children. They didn''t spent a lot of time together. One day Annala''s husband said,"How about having a picture contest, so we can have a great time! We can invite the whole family; Grandma, Grandpa, and the rest of the gang!" The mother accepted the challenge. The day of the picture contest everyone was there. So far everyone had very lovely pictures. A picture of a flower, a picture of a cat, a picture of a dog, and a picture of a duck. The youngest child was the last. Everyone was cheering while he was presenting. He proudly announced, "This great picture I made is of my mommy and daddy wrestling on the bed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at home one day when my son walked in on me and my husband.He said "Momma i found this moving around on the floor".(holding up my vibrator)I said "huh?"he asked if he could play with it...I said sure not knowing what it was at the time....I come out of my room go in his and its in his ass. Needless to say,he has watched me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blonde''s left leg say to her right leg? Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is revenge sweet, but payback is a b*tch?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Age 1: You don''t piddle in your pants Age 4: You can walk without help Age 21: You can drive Age 60: You can drive Age 70: You can walk without help Age 80: You don''t piddle in your pants', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('90 percent of people in Idaho say, "Oh shit!" when in a car wreck, The other ten percent say, "Hold my beer and watch this shit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day I was watching the news and there was the strangest story. You see a man went to Huck''s gas station and was filling up his red gas holder for emergencies during the winter, and when he put the cap on some sloshed out onto his arm. He didn''t think anything of it and went on ahead and got in his car and drove off. Two miles down the road he lit up a cigarette and caught his arms on hands on fire! He pulled off to the side and a cop driving by pulled over by him. And you know what he gave the man a ticket... for illegal use of fire-arms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In WW2 Captain Saunders was wounded in battle and captured by the Germans. He was sent to a German military hospital. On his first day in the hospital a doctor came, bearing bad news, "we have to amputate your legs." The Captain was very sad, however he asked the doctor if his legs could be dropped in his commanders next bombing mission over Britain. The doctor asked his commander, and he said yes. And sure enough it was dropped. On the second day the doctor came bearing more bad news, "we have to amputate your left arm." The Captain was sadder than before, but he asked if this could also be dropped, in the commander''s next mission. The answer was yes and it was dropped. On the third day, the doctor came bearing even more bad news, "we have to amputate your right arm." The Captain was also sad, and he asked the arm could be dropped in the next bombing mission. The doctor replied, "NO, my commander thinks you are trying to escape"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are traveling in the Amazon, a German, an American, and a Mexican, and they get captured by some Amazons. The head of the tribe says to the German, "What do you want on your back for your Amazonian whipping?" The German responds, "I will take oil!" So they put oil on his back, and a large Amazon whips him ten times. When he is finished the German has these huge welts on his back, and he can hardly move. The Amazons haul the German away, and say to the Mexican, "What do you want on your back?" "I will take nothing!" says the Mexican, and he stands there straight and takes his ten lashings without a single flinch. "What will you take on your back?" the Amazons ask the American. He responds, "I''ll take the Mexican."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was sitting in chat room, Feeling mildly amused, When I saw something strange, That left me all confused. Someone typed a word, (As far as I could tell) But I had never seen it. What is an LOL? Then the plot got thicker, More words I didn''t know, A person started typing, The word LMAO. I sat there in amazement, I felt like a dumb toad. Could it be, these people, Were speaking in a code? That''s when I looked closer. And found the subtle clue. I figured out this code And I''ll share it now, with you. LOL is three little words, That seem, to me, quite shady. Why would someone ever write The words, "Lean Over Lady"? LMAO, was more obscure, It made me sweat my socks! LMAO is a command, Meaning, "Leave Me Alone, Ox!" ROFL was harder still, I found it rather sickening. It''s a discreet way to say, "Ready Only For Licking!" I can''t believe that AOL, Would let this code exist! To them I say, YOMSL Meaning, "You''re On My Shit List!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many will recall that on July 8, 1947, witnesses claimed that an Unidentified object with five aliens aboard crashed onto a sheep and cattle ranch just outside Roswell, New Mexico. This is a well-known incident that many say has long been covered up by the US Air Force and the federal government. However, you may NOT know that in the month of March 1948, exactly nine months after that historic day, Albert Arnold Gore, Jr., Hillary Rodham, John F Kerry, William Jefferson Clinton, Howard Dean, Nancy Pelosi, Dianne Feinstein, Charles E Schumer, and Barbara Boxer were born. See what happens when aliens breed with sheep? This piece of information may clear up a lot of things.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Santa:Oye, you know once, when I was very young, I jumped from the 20th floor of a building. Banta: Then what happened? Did you survived or die? Santa replied: "Oye, I forgot, that was years ago".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q1: What is red and goes tring tring tring? A1: tomato and the tring tring tring was to confuse you anyways. Here''s one more. Q2: What is red and goes tring tring tring? A2: The door bell and the red was to confuse you anyways. Here''s one more. Q3: What is red and goes tring tring tring? A3: A cake and both were to confuse you anyways. Here''s one more. Q4: What''s red and goes tring tring tring? A4: Fire brigade, OBVIOUSLY! You thought I was trying to confuse you again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Tom throw butter outside the window? Because he wanted to see the butter-fly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she get in the elevator, u know, its Goin Down! (does motorcyle dance)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Musharraf went to the US & had a meeting with President Bush. Bush said, "I want to show you the advancement in technology in USA. Come with me." Bush takes him in a deep forest and says, "Dig the ground." Musharraf digs. Bush says, "More, more, more..." Musharraf has now reached 100 feet. Bush says, "So now, did you find anything?" Musharraf, "I got a wire!" Bush says, "You see, it shows that even 200 years ago we used to have telephones!" Musharraf was very frustrated and he invited Bush to Pakistan. In Pakistan Musharraf says, "Now I want to show you the advancement in Pakistan!" He takes Bush to a forest and asks him to dig. After some time Musharraf says, "More. ... More... more!" Bush has now reached almost 400 feet. Musharraf says, "Find anything?" Bush tries but finds nothing, "Nothing here!" Musharraf says, "You see! 400 years ago we had WIRELESS telephones!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple visit a sex therapist, who asked the wife, "What''s your main complaint about your sex life? She replied, "My husband suffers from premature ejaculation." The therapist asked the husband, "Is this true?" He replied, "Well, not exactly, I don''t suffer. She does."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man received a notice from the IRS that he was being audited. He asked his accountant for advice on what to wear to the meeting with the IRS agent. The accountant said, "Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let them think you''re poor." The man asked his lawyer the same question. The lawyer advised, "Show them you''re a professional. Wear your best suit and tie." Confused, the man went to his rabbi and asked his advice. "Let me tell you a story," the rabbi said. "A woman was getting married. She asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. Her mom said, `Wear a long flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck,'' but her best friend said, `Wear a sexy negligee.''" The man asked. "What does this have to do with my problem with the IRS?" The rabbi replied, "The lesson is that no matter what you wear, you''re going to get screwed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something to text to your friendz The police found a body with no brain, fucked up teeth, a small dick, and a swollen asshole Just called to make sure you are okay I was worried', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when a lion roars? Tom n Jerry starts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A noted biologist, who had been studying little green frogs in a swamp, was stumped. The frog population, despite efforts at predator control, was declining at an alarming rate. A chemist at a nearby college came up with a solution: The frogs, due to a chemical change in the swamp water, simply couldn''t stay coupled long enough to reproduce successfully. The chemist then brewed up a new adhesive to assist the frogs'' togetherness, which included one part sodium. It seems the little green frogs needed some "monosodium glue to mate".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to her six- year-old son, Johnny, and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn''t know what to say," Little Johnny replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say," the mother said. Little Johnny bowed his head and said, "Dear Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Little Johnny''s teacher asked the class "Children, who can answer this question, please raise your hand!" "Mention things you can suck!" "Ice cream, mam!" Little Jane answered. "Good, Jane." the teacher said, "Anyone else?" "It''s a lollipop!" said Little Steven. "Very good, now it''s your turn Johnny!" the teacher said. Little Johnny, sitting at back then answered, "I think it''s lamp!" The teacher and all of the students wondered about Little Johnny''s answer. The teacher asked him, "Johnny, how do you think we can suck lamp?" "Well, last night when I passed my parents'' bedroom", Little Johnny said, "I heard my mom said, please turn off the lamp, honey, and let me suck it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alligator One day, Grandma sent her grandson Johnny down to the water hole to get some water for cooking dinner. As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and hightailed it for Grandma''s kitchen. "Well now, where''s my bucket and where''s my water?" Grandma asked him. "I can''t get any water from that water hole, Grandma" exclaimed Johnny. "There''s a BIG ol'' alligator down there!" "Now don''t you mind that ol'' alligator, Johnny. He''s been there for a few years now, and he''s never hurt no one. Why, he''s probably as scared of you as you are of him!" "Well, Grandma," replied Johnny, "if he''s as scared of me as I am of him, then that water ain''t fit to drink!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baby Brother Little Johnny''s new baby brother was screaming up a storm. He asked his mom, "Where''d we get him?" His mother says, "Heaven, Johnny." Johnny says, "Geez, I can see why they threw him out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baked Beans One of the matrons of the church was cooking a pot of her famous beans for the church potluck, and her son, Little Johnny, came running through the house, BB gun in one hand, and a handful of BBs in the other. He tripped and the BBs, naturally, went right into the pot of beans. Thinking it over, Little Johnny could think of no reason why he should risk punishment, so he said nothing. The dinner went well, and, as usual, the beans were one of the favorite dishes. The next day, the church secretary, Mary, called Little Johnny''s mother and said, "Jane, your beans were delicious as usual, but what did you put in them this time?" Jane replied, "Nothing new, why do you ask?" "Well," said Mary, "this morning I bent over to feed the cat and shot the canary."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blood Circulation A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said, "Now, boys, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I should turn red in the face." "Yes, sir," the boys said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn''t run into my feet?" Little Johnny shouted, "''Cause yer feet ain''t empty."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven''t got the guts to bite people themselves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harry, Bill and Steve are sitting at the corner bar enjoying themselves, when Ted walks in looking distressed. "Ted, you look awful. What''s wrong?" Harry asks. Ted says, "Last night I got really drunk, and then somewhere between here and my house, I was abducted by an alien?" Everyone is shocked. "I heard about this kind of thing happening!" Bill says. "What did the alien do to you?" "I don''t remember all the details," Ted says. "All I remember is being anally probed by the alien." Everyone is horrified. "I heard that they''ll do that!" Steve says. "What did the alien look like?" Ted responds, "Bill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most dangerous insect? The hepatitis bee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The little church in the suburbs suddenly stopped buying from its regular office supply dealer, so the dealer telephoned Deacon Brown to ask why. "I''ll tell you why," shouted Deacon Brown. "Our church ordered some pencils from you to be used in the pews for visitors to register." "Well," interrupted the dealer, "didn''t you receive them?" "Oh, we received them all right," replied Deacon Brown. "However, you sent us golf pencils; each stamped with the words, `Play Golf Next Sunday.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('a = b, b = c, a = c. Math Teacher: If a = b and b = c then a = c. Now give me the practical example of this principle from real life. Student: I love you, sir, and you love your daughter, which means I love your daughter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ahmed was in the hospital, near death, so the family sent for his friend Tauseef Khan. As Tauseef stood beside the bed, Ahmed''s frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Tauseef lovingly handed him a pen and piece of paper, and Ahmed used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note, then died. Tauseef thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped it into his jacket pocket. Several days later, at the funeral, Tauseef was visting Ahmed''s family. He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he''d worn the day Ahmed died. "You know," he said, "Ahmed handed me a note just before he died. I haven''t read it, but knowing him, I''m sure there''s a word of inspiration there for us all." He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You''re - standing - on - my - oxygen - tube!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to identify a dumb guy. You should be sure the person is a dum guy when he: Puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to make up his mind. Gets stabbed in a shoot-out. Sends a fax with a postage stamp on it. Tries to drown a fish in water. Thinks socialism means partying. Trips over a cordless phone. Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept. At the bottom of the application where it says "Sign Here" he puts "Sagittarius." Studies for a blood test and fails. Sells the car for gas money. Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead. Drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, "Airport left", he turns around and goes home. Gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Then there was the dyslexic robber who held up the bank with a gnu.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse a frog? Put it in a round bowl and tell it to take a nap in the corner. How does a frog confuse you? When he comes out and says he needed that nap and feels much better!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this really annoying elephant named Izzy who loved to brag. One day she went up to a camel, Mell, and said, "I am the most beautiful animal you''ll ever see!!" Mell looked at her like she was crazy and said no you''re not! Izzy said, "Well, I look better than you because I don''t have two boobs on my back!" Mell replied, "True, very true. But at least I don''t have a dick on my face."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between you and a ho? The ho is smarter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are actual questions written to pastors from children across the world. Dear Pastor, Please say a prayer for our Little League team. We need God''s help or a new pitcher. Thank you. Alexander. Age 10, Raleigh Dear Pastor, My father says I should learn the Ten Commandments, but I don''t think I want to because we have enough rules already in my house. Joshua. Age 10, South Pasadena Dear Pastor, Who does God pray to? Is there a God for God? Sincerely, Christopher. Age 9, Titusville Dear Pastor, Are there any devils on earth? I think there may be one in my class. Carla. Age 10, Salina Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon on Sunday. Especially when it was finished. Ralph, Age 11, Akron Dear Pastor, How does God know the good people from the bad people? Do you tell Him or does He read about it in the newspapers? Sincerely, Marie. Age 9, Lewiston', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Pastor, I would like to go to heaven some day because I know my brother won''t be there. Stephen. Age 8, Chicago Dear Pastor, I think a lot more people would come to your church if you moved it to Disneyland. Loreen. Age 9. Tacoma Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon where you said that good health is more important than money but I still want a raise in my allowance. Sincerely, Eleanor. Age 12, Sarasota Dear Pastor, Please pray for all the airline pilots. I am flying to California tomorrow. Laurie. Age 10, New York City Dear Pastor, I hope to go to heaven some day but later than sooner. Love, Ellen, age 9. Athens', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Pastor, I know God loves everybody but He never met my sister. Yours sincerely, Arnold. Age 8, Nashville. Dear Pastor, Please say in your sermon that Peter Peterson has been a good boy all week. I am Peter Peterson. Sincerely, Pete. Age 9, Phoenix Dear Pastor, My father should be a minister. Every day he gives us a sermon about something. Robert Anderson, age 11 Dear Pastor, I''m sorry I can''t leave more money in the plate, but my father didn''t give me a raise in my allowance. Could you have a sermo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who was the greatest financier in the Bible? Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible? Pharaoh''s daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible? Samson. He brought the house down. Where is the first baseball game in the Bible? In the big inning, Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel, and the Prodigal Son came home. The Giants and the Angels were rained out. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible? David. He rocked Goliath to sleep. What is the best way to get to Paradise? Turn right and go straight. Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible? When Joseph served in Pharaoh''s court.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re in incredible shape, the doctor said. "How old are you again?" "I am 78," said the man. "78!" remarked the doctor. "How do you stay so healthy? You look like a 60-year-old." "Well, my wife and I made a pact when we got married that whenever she got mad she would go into the kitchen and cool off and I would go outside for a walk to settle down," the man explained. "What does that have to do with it?" asked the doctor. "I''ve pretty much lived an outdoor life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat when she got into the UPS truck they had to change the name to DOWNS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk lay slumped outside a bar, in serious need of a drink. A passing priest and bishop started to lecture him on the evils of alcohol. "You should be more like God, like me," said one. The other argued, "No, my son, more like me. I am more like God." The two holy men then argued over which was more like God. Finally, the drunk interrupted. "I''m more like God than either of you arguing hypocrites, and if you give me ten bucks, I''ll prove it!" They accepted his challenge and each handed him five dollars. As the drunk stood, he said, "You two go sit in the bar and when I enter you''ll have your proof." The bishop entered first and the barkeep said, "Good afternoon, Bishop, what''ll you have?" Then the priest entered and the barkeep said, "Good afternoon, Father, what''ll you have?" Finally, the drunk came in waving his ten dollars. The bartender shrugged, "Oh, God, not you again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What breaks up a redneck orgy? When mom and dad/uncle arrive home too soon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Year 1981 1. Prince Charles got married 2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe 3. Australia lost the Ashes 4. Pope Died In Year 2005 1. Prince Charles got married (again) 2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe(again) 3. Australia lost the Ashes (again) 4. Pope Died (again) Moral of the story - In future, if Prince Charles decides to re-marry.... Please warn the Pope', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('James Bond: "My name is Bond" Continuing in his inimitable style, "......James Bond." Then Bond asks: "And you?" Telugu Guy: "My name is Rao... Siva Rao... Samba Siva Rao... Venkata Samba Siva Rao... Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao... Rajasekhara Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao... Sitaramanjaneyula Rajasekhara Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao... Vijayawada Sitaramanjaneyula Rajasekhara Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao..." Since then when anyone asks Bond his name he simply says "James Bond"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly." On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?" "Yes," the boy''s mother answered. "And how is your son now?" the psychiatrist asked. "Who cares?" the mother replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THIS WAS REAL! My brother and his friend went out to eat at a restaurant. The restaurant was packed so they had to wait. The waitress then asked them for a name so she could call them when their table was ready. My brother''s friend decided to give her a fake name. So then my brother and his friend were waiting. When it they were finally called, this is what could be heard throughout the whole entire restaurant, "Balz, party of two!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you carry more than two extra tires in the back of your truck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you were married in a laundromat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you eat cotton candy more than three times a week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if the only thing you inherited from your father was alcoholism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if both you and your wife wore ponytails on your wedding day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if there is a four-wheeler parked in your bedroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you think that "home security" means taking the front steps to your trailer with you when you leave the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your bar tab has page numbers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you constantly call the feed and seed store to see if the cat has had her kittens yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your father-in-law said that you had no class, so you spit at him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('230 The number of keys in an ordinary piano is eighty eight 231 ''Man is a Tool Making Animal'' was said by Benjamin Franklin 232 The term ''anesthesia'' was coined by Oliver Wendell Holmes 233 The first man to reach Antartica was Fabian Gottlieb 234 The Kilimanjaro volcano is situated in Tanzania 235 The invention that is considered to have built America is dynamite', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of ''COINCIDENCE?''" STUDENT: "Sir, my mother and my father got married on the same day, same time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots ! Student: Yes it''s really strange. I''ve got another pair just like that at home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Game Set Match = Tennis Set Match Run = Arson', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a captain of a ship, and every day at a certain time he would lock himself up in his cabin and look inside a mysterious black box. He did this every day, but he told nobody what was inside the box. Then one day he died, and in his testament he gave the crew permission to open the box. So they opened the black box, and what they found was a piece of paper: "Starboard is right, port is left."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that when someone asked her for her weight, he replied with, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They''re trained for that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('rats have more bones than men parrot can see backwards without turning its head HUMMING BIRD - (RUBY-THROATED) -------------------------------- MASS: About 3-4g (a nickel weighs about 5g). LENGTH: About 8.5cm (3.5") from tip of bill to tip of tail WING BEATS: About 60-80 times per second in normal flight, up to 200 times per second in courtship dives SPEED: Normal flight about 25mph; up to 65kph (40mph) in a courtship dive HEARTBEATS: About 250 times per minute while at rest, about 1,220 per minute while flying BREATHING: About 250 breaths per minute while at rest BODY TEMPERATURE: 40.5 degrees C (105-108 degrees F) FEATHERS: A typical Hum-bird has 940 feathers. FEED RATE: Eats about its weight in nectar or sugar water each day. AVERAGE AGE: Most hummingbirds die within their first year; those that don''t probably live an average of 3 years or so', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The smartest dogs are the Jack Russell Terrier and Scottish Border collie. Dumbest: Afgan hound. A rat can go without water longer than a camel can. The fat molecules in goat''s milk are 5 times smaller than those found in cow''s milk. It takes 20 minutes for the stomach to break down as opposed to the hour that it takes to break down cow''s milk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('IN 24 HOURS AVERAGE HUMAN 1) HEART beats 103,689 times. 2) LUNGS respire 23,045 times. 3) BLOOD flows 1,680,000 miles. 4) NAILS grow 0.00007 inches. 5) HAIR grows 0.01715 inches. 6) Take 2.9 pounds WATER (including all liquids.) 7) Take of 3.25 pounds FOOD. 8) Breathes 438 cubic feet AIR. 9) Lose 85.60 BODY TEMPERATURE. 10) Produce 1.43 pints of SWEAT. 11) Speak 4,800 WORDS. 12) During SLEEP move 25.4 times.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How you get rid of grey hairs: 1. Dye all your hair the color grey. 2. Shave your head. 3. Now you have no grey hairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy and his two friends are talking at a bar. His first friend says: "I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician. The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren''t mine." His second friend says: "I think my wife is having an affair with the plumber. The other day I found a wrench under the bed and it wasn''t mine." Paddy says: "I think my wife is having an affair with a horse." Both his friends look at him with utter disbelief. "No, I''m serious. The other day I came home and found a jockey under our bed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so stupid, that I told her to do the robot, and damn! Now R2-D2 got AIDS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Help.... The Titanic is going to sink. Everybody on the ship is shouting, crying, running or praying to God... Just then an Italian asks a nearby blond on the ship, Italian: "How far is land from here?" Blond: "Two miles." Italian: "Only two miles? Then why are these fools making so much noise? I can swim even further." The Italian jumps off the ship into the sea and comes up to the surface to ask something again. Italian: "Just tell me which side is the land two miles from here?" Blond: "Downwards......"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which dog doesn''t have a tail? Hot dogs, of course.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... A: Does that mean that one enjoys it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did You Know .... Did you know that in the human body there is a nerve that connects the eyeball to the anus? It is called the anal optic nerve. It is responsible for giving people a crappy outlook on life. If you don''t believe it, pull a hair from your ass, and see if it doesn''t bring a tear to your eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Penis breath, a lover''s dread. Is what you get when you give head. Unpleasant as it tends to be. Be grateful that he doesn''t pee. It''s times like this you wonder why. You bother reaching for his fly. But it''s too late, can''t be a tease. Accept the facts, get on your knees. You know you''ve got a job to do. So open up and shove it through. Lick the tip then take it all. Don''t drag your teeth or he might bawl. Slide up and down, use your tongue. And feel the precum start to run. So when the fuck''s he gonna cum. Just when you can''t take anymore. Your hear your lover''s mighty roar. And when he hit''s that real high note. You feel it oozing down your throat. Salty, fishy, sticky, nasty stuff. Okay already, that''s enough. Let''s switch you say, before you gag. And what''s your revenge, you''re on your rag.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A loaded mini van pulled in to the only remaining site at a campground. Four children leaped from the vehicle and began feverishly unloading gear and setting up the tent. The boys rushed to gather firewood, while the girls and their mother set up the camp stove and cooking utensils. Impressed, a nearby camper sauntered over and said to the youngsters'' father, "That, sir, is some display of teamwork." "I have a system," the father replied. "No one goes to the bathroom until the camp is set up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple enjoyed getting away from their high-stress jobs by spending weekends in their motor home, but their peace and quiet was often disturbed by well-meaning, but unwelcome, visits from other campers. Finally, they found a way to assure themselves privacy. They painted a sign near their RV''s door: "Ask us about our Whole Life policies!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the other hand you have five fingers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people have friends who are dwarfs, not me I have a friend who is a midget dwarf. He is the guy who poses for the sport trophys', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women like silent men - they think they''re listening.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I''m Mr. Sugarbrown''s daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong; she must say, "I''m Jane Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said, "Aren''t you Mr. Sugarbrown''s daughter?" She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I''m not."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Twinkle, twinkle little star how I wonder what you are Shine upon a parking lot As I eat my girlfriends twat. Peter, Peter pumpkin eater Saw a chick but couldn''t meet her Saw her brother one fine day Sucked his cock and now he''s GAY. Jack Sprat could eat no fat His wife could eat no lean So he ignored her flabby tits An licked her asshole clean. Eenie Meanie Miney Mo Suck my dick and swallow slow. Mary Mary quite contrary Shave that pussy its so damn hairy. Hickory Dickory Dock Some chick was sucking my cock The clock struck two I blew my goo And dumped the bitch off at the next block. Hickory Dickory Dock Some chick was sucking my cock It was quite scary all wrinkled and hairy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And then there was the glass-blower who got hiccups and made 764 marbles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think your life is bad, how would you like to be an egg? You get laid once in life, you only get eatten once in life, It takes 4 min to get hard, but only 2 min. to get soft, you share your box with 11 other guys, but worst of all the only chick who ever sat on your face was your mother. Pass this to someone who needs a good lay, sorry I mean day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what to say when someone is trying to roast you? "Sorry, but my brain doesn''t interpret stupid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a woman taking a shower when she heard a knock on door. A voice called, "It''s me, the fireman." So the woman wrapped a towel around herself and went to the door. The fireman said, "Congratulate me, I just put out a fire!" So the woman congratulated him and went back to her shower. Then she heard another knock on her door and a voice called, "It''s me, the policeman". So the woman wrapped a towel around herself and went to the door. The policeman said, "Congratulate me, I just caught a robber". So the woman congratulated him and went back to her shower. But before long she heard another knock on her door and a voice called, "It''s me, the blind man," so she didn''t bother putting a towel around herself and answered the door where the blind man said, "Congratulate me, I just got my eyesight back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "How come you do not comb your hair?" Billy: "No comb, Sir." Teacher: "Use your dad''s then." Billy: "No hair, Sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so old, she babysat Yoda!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Tommy was telling his friend Billy all about his Christmas presents. "My daddy bought me a mouth organ. It''s the best present I''ve ever had." "Why?" "Because my mummy gives me extra money every week if I don''t play it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of young children was sitting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions. "Davy, what noise does a cow make?" "It goes moo." "Alice, what noise does a cat make?" "It goes meow." "Jamie, what sound does a lamb make?" "It goes baaa." "Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make?" "Errr..it goes.. click!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was teaching her three-year-old daughter The Lord''s Prayer. For several evenings at bedtime, she repeated it after her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo. The mother listened with pride, as she carefully enunciated each word right up to the end. "And lead us not into temptation", she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandpa and granddaughter were sitting talking when she asked, "Did God make you, Grandpa?" "Yes, God made me," the grandfather answered. A few minutes later, the little girl asked him, "Did God make me, too?" "Yes, He did," the older man answered. For a few minutes, the little girl seemed to be studying her grandpa, as well as her own reflection in the mirror, while her grandfather wondered what was running through her mind. At last she spoke up. "You know, Grandpa," she said, "God''s doing a lot better job lately."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a high school break-in in Plymouth, North Carolina, two burglars found a camera in one of the classrooms and amused themselves by taking pictures of each other committing the crime. When they couldn''t figure out how to get the film out of the camera, they concluded it wasn''t loaded and left it behind. The men apparently didn''t realize they''d been fooling around with a digital camera that stores pictures on a computer disk. Investigators downloaded the snapshots to a computer and got a complete photographic record of the break-in. The suspects were quickly arrested. A luckless thief pleaded guilty to the attempted robbery of a convenience store in Detroit Lakes, Minnesota. The thief told a passer-by he was going to rob the store, gave the man a dollar, and asked him to go inside and buy a scarf to hide his identity during the crime. The bystander took the dollar, went inside the store... and called the police.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Nevada fugitive wanted on fraud charges was arrested in Connecticut after he blew his cover by applying for a job... as a police officer. The Connecticut cops discovered the man''s fugitive status during a standard background check. He had passed both the written and agility tests before being found out. Police called the man in to headquarters under the guise of getting his fingerprints, and served him with an arrest warrant instead. A repeat offender got a life sentence for a small-time shoplifting caper in Jupiter, Florida. The man stole $49.73 worth of boxer shorts, panties, a sports bra and some cigarette lighters from a Wal-Mart store. His mistake was flashing a knife at a security guard - which turned his petty theft into a felony. Since the man had been released from prison less than three years before, Florida''s repeat offender law required the judge to send him away for life without the possibility of parole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: Why do you have a steering wheel in your crotch? Other Man: My wife was driving me nuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I invented a cure for amnesia - but I''ve forgotten what it is!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was lost for hours when he suddenly came up to a house. The man knocked on the door and asks to enter. The woman who owns the house asked, "Who is it?" The man answered, "I and I King Silassi I Jah Rasta Fari." The lady replied, "Go away, there are too many of you for me to let you in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that her roller blades went flat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sorry I''m late... I had to walk down stairs... since yo momma took up the entire elevator and it broke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man boarded an airplane in Sydney, Australia, with a box of crabs. A female crew member took it and promised to put it in the crew''s refrigerator, which she did. Shortly before landing, she couldn''t remember who gave her the package, so she announced to the entire cabin, "Would the gentleman who gave me the crabs in Sydney please raise your hand?" Not one hand went up, so she took them home and ate them herself!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bubba walked into a doctor''s office and the receptionist asked him what he had. Bubba said, "Shingles." So she wrote down his name, address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat. Fifteen minutes later a nurse''s aide came out and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, "Shingles." So she wrote down his height, weight, a complete medical history and told Bubba to wait in the examining room. A half hour later a nurse came in and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, "Shingles." So the nurse gave Bubba a blood test, a blood pressure test, an electrocardiogram, and told Bubba to take off all his clothes and wait for the doctor. An hour later the doctor came in and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, "Shingles." The doctor asked, "Where?" Bubba said, "Outside on the truck. Where do you want them?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is completely true! Okay, so it was after dinner and my sister, dad and I were at the table just kinda goofing off then my sister asked me this riddle: There is one man in a jungle, he reaches into his pocket and takes something out, it has a head and a tail but no body, yet he is not afraid. What was the thing he found in his pocket? I couldn''t figure it out so my dad gave me a hint: you can flip it. I still could not figure it out. What do you flip? asked my dad. Then I was all like: A coin. A COIN! A COIN! THAT''S IT, A COIN!!! What can I say? I''m a blonde, but it doesn''t count too much because I have dirty blonde hair and blonde and dirty blonde isn''t the same thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Chuck Norris beat the brick wall in tennis. 2. The boogy man does not wait for chuck norris, Chuck Norris waits for the boogy man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One employee asked another, "How long have you been working here?" The second said, "Ever since the boss threatened to fire me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is true! In a speech George W. Bush made in 2001 he concluded: But all in all, my wife and I have had a wonderful year! (2001 was the year that the Twin Towers were destroyed)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was recently riding with a friend of mine. We were coming to a red light, and he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why''d you do that?" He tells me this is how his brother drives. We come to another red light, and again, he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why''d you do that?" Again, he tells me this is how his brother drives. We come to a green light, and he SLAMS on the brakes. My heart nearly goes into my throat. I shouted at him, "Why do you do that?!" He replied, "You never know, my brother could be coming the other way."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell the difference between a blonde and a red head? Hair color.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get pikachu on a bus? You pokemon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lou sat at the bar furiously pounding down shots of whiskey. His best friend, Jim, spotted him and said, "Lou, what''s going on? Are you okay? I''ve known you for fifteen years and I''ve never seen you drink like this before." Staring at his next filled shot glass, Lou replied, "My wife just ran off with my best friend," and tossed that drink down, too. "But I thought that I was your best friend?" said Jim. Lou looked at Jim through bloodshot eyes and slurred, "Not any more!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Somali arrives in Minneapolis as a new immigrant to the United States. He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you Mr. American for letting me in this country, giving me housing, food stamps,free medical care, and free education!" The passerby says, "You are mistaken, I am Mexican." The man goes on and encounters another passerby."Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in America!" The person says, "I not American, I Vietnamese." The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand and says, "Thank you for the wonderful America!" That person puts up his hand and says, "I am from Middle East, I am not American!" He finally sees a nice lady and asks, "Are you an American?" She says, "No, I am from Africa!" Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the Americans?" The African lady checks her watch and says..."Probably at work."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke.The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup. The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil. At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results: The first worm in alcohol - Dead. The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead. Third worm in chocolate syrup - Dead . Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive. So the Minister asked the congregation,"What can you learn from this demonstration?" Maxine was sitting in the back, quickly raised her hand and said,"As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won''t have worms!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with a pig? Jurassic pork!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at my friends house and we were bragging about how little we can eat. My friend J.B sister said some times I don''t eat all day. I asked her, "oh you fast?" Then she says, "No, I''m actually pretty slow." Then her mom told her fasting is not eating for a long time. That is why breakfast is called breakfast, to break your fast and eat. Then his sister goes, "How do you know?" I busted a gut so bad. She should have been a blond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman phones up her husband at work for a chat. HIM "I''m sorry dear but I''m up to my neck in work today." HER "But I''ve got some good news and some bad news for you dear." HIM "OK, darling, but as I''ve got no time now, just give me the good news." HER "Well, the air bag works."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One man solved his problem of too many visiting relatives by borrowing money from the rich ones and loaning it to the poor ones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the Library of Congress and the House of Representatives? In the Library of Congress you''re not allowed to lick the pages!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest was assigned a small church in the Alaskan backwoods. After a couple of years, the bishop stopped by to see how he was doing. "Ah, Bishop, it''s really lonely here. I couldn''t have made it without my Rosary and two martinis a day." The bishop replied, "You know, a martini would taste good right now." The priest agreed and yelled into the kitchen, "Hey, Rosary! Fix us a couple of martinis, will ya!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A son asked his mother the following question: "Mum, why are wedding dresses white?" The mother replies, "Son, this shows your friends and relatives that your bride is pure." The son thanks his Mum and goes off to double-check this with his father. "Dad, why are wedding dresses white?" The father says, "Son, all household appliances come in white."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teenage boy with spiked hair, a nose ring, and baggy clothes was overheard telling a friend, "I don''t really like to dress like this, but it keeps my parents from dragging me everywhere with them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fat men took part in a marathon. One ran in short bursts, and the other ran in burst shorts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fat woman and a slim woman were both smoking cigarettes; which one finished hers first? The fat woman - she takes bigger draws.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We all know that Hilary Duff dyed her hair blonde, but the turning point when she actually BECAME a blonde was in a song she wrote. It was the following: "When the light is off then it isn''t on." From the song "So Yesterday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t think of yourself as a zero, think of yourself as the number below one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The policeman stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name. "I''m Mrs. Ladislav Abdulkhashim Zybkcicraznovskaya from the Republic of Uzbekistan visiting my daughter in Columbia," she said. The cop put away his summons book and pen, and said, "Well, OK... but don''t let me catch you speeding again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Idaho. Idaho who? I da hoe!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man hated the Trojans. He loved USC. Why? He hated using Trojan condoms. He wanted to have sex the o''natural way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Richard Nixon become President? Everyone called him Dick! They judged him by his name!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know when you''ve had enough sex? When you die from AIDS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This storm is bad, Bob thundered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A book never written: Becoming a Better Artist by N.O. Creativity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A book never written: L.O.L. (lots o'' logs) by P. Lumyum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A book never written: Yellow Rivers by L. O. Tsoftea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is telling her class she has two words that will not be allowed to use. Teacher: There are two words which I will never let you use. One is gross and the other is cool. Student: So what are the words?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many football players does it take to change a lightbulb? The whole team - and they each get a semester scholarship for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a book never written. Extinction is Distinction by Dinah Soar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What bird can''t fly as high as you can jump? A bird in a cage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which candles burn longer, the candles on a girl''s cake or a boy''s cake? No candles burn longer. They all burn shorter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor one day was accidentally cut rather badly on the leg. He went to an operating theatre and started to stitch his own leg up, using a local anaesthetic. While doing this, a colleague came into the room, and offered to help. The first doctor thanked him, but said he would carry on himself. The second doctor said, "Ok, suture self!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde goes into a newsagent''s office and asks for her usual paper. The newsagent says, "Did you know your paper is going to cost more from tomorrow?" "In that case, I''d better buy ten more of today''s!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, a man walked into a bar. He went up to the counter and ordered his drink. The guy next to him had a bowl of chili that he didnt seem to be eating. "Sir, could I bother you for some chili?" he asked very politely. "Go right ahead" he responded, passing the chili. About half way through, he saw there was a rat at the bottom of the chili. In repsonse to this he puked the chili back up. At this time the man next to him stared. "Funny thats farther than I got," he said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb I told her to do an essay and she went and fucked a mexican...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many George Walter Bushes does it take to change a lightbulb? Luckily, only 2. The world can''t handle many more idiots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Returning home from dinner out one night, I started to feel sick. Suspecting food poisoning, I called the restaurant''s manager. "I can''t believe that happened!", she said. She sounded truly shocked. "What did you order?" I told her I ordered the meat loaf. "That''s weird,"she observed."Usually it''s the stuffing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was playing in the playground when he looks over and sees two teenagers having sex. He runs over to his mum who tells him that they are making ''cupcakes''. He then goes on and continues playing. He then sees two 20 year olds getting naked in the sand box. He runs over to his mum and asks what they are doing. She again tells him that they are making ''cupcakes''. The next morning Little Johnny''s mum asked him if he had a good sleep. He replies no. He then goes on "You and daddy were making a lot of noise when you were making ''cupcakes'' last night". She Replies "And how do you know we were making "cupcakes?" He then says with a huge grin on his face. "I licked the icing off the couch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell when a lawyer is well-hung? When you can''t fit your fingers between the rope and his throat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Microsoft Employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they''ll just make darkness the new industry standard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does playing the bagpipes and throwing a javelin blind-folded have in common? You don''t have to be very good at either to get a lot of peoples'' attention.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does anyone know why I have nightmares? Because the last man that had a "dream" got shot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were 3 boys named trouble, jackass, and manners. They were playing a game of hide and seek. Trouble was counting, manners was hid up in a tree, and jackass was hiding behind the same tree. A police man walks over to jackass and says "I''ll give you a lollipop if you tell me your name". He then replies, "jackass." The police man says where are your manners, he then points up in the tree. The police man says, "are you looking for trouble". Trouble then says "no trouble is looking for me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Utah, the following laws are on the books: 1) Birds have the rightaway on all highways. 2)It''s legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list. 3) In Tremonton, it is illegal to have sex in a moving ambulance.If you are caught doing so the guy is let go and the woman is punished and her name appears in the newspaper. 4) In Trout Creek, pharmacists may not sell gunpowder to cure headaches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) In Bettendorf, it is illegal for liquor stores to place advertisements for beer outside the store. 2)In Mount Vernon, a person first must obtain written permission from the City Council before throwing bricks into a highway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was asked to open up the coffee shop on Monday. So, the blonde went in early to open up. She gathered all the ingredients together, and had everything ready for the customers. Half an hour went by, and still no customers entered the coffee shop. The blonde decided to read the comics to pass the time. An hour later, her co-worker came in late as the blonde was still reading the comics. "Why does the sign say closed?" the co-worker asked the blonde. The blonde looked up from her comics, "Nah uh. It doesn''t say closed. Look right there," she said pointing at the sign. "See, it says open."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good marriage would be between a blind woman, and a deaf man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wal-mart is planning on opening fifty new stores in areas that are blighted. Ironically, the official definition of blighted is what happens to an area when Wal-mart opens a store nearby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack: Why did you name your pig Paris Hilton? Jill: She''s always trying to hog up all the attention.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo dadda liked women until he saw yo momma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom''s favorite joke, played on some radio station. ORIGINAL JOKE: Johnny- Mother, can I have another piece of cake? Mother- Yes, you may have more cake, but if you do, you''ll explode! Well, Johnny ate another piece of cake and sure enough, he exploded. RIDDLE: What sits next to mother, eats cake and explodes? Give up? JOHNNY! FORGET PUNCHLINE: You- Johnny asks mother if he can have another piece of cake. Mother says yes, but if you do, you''ll explode.So then Johnny er... Johnny um Johnnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy erm listens to mother?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is funny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. - Henny Youngman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a dog have fur? ''Cause if he didn''t he''d be a little "bare"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen? --------------------- 54. Two in the front, two in the back, and fifty in the ashtray. What is the difference between a large pizza and a Jew? --------------------- The large pizza won''t scream when you put it in the oven.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a black man and a large pizza? -------------- a large pizza can feed a family of four What do sperm and black men have in common? -------------- only one in a million work!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alaska A law in Fairbanks does not allow moose to have sex on city streets. (O_o) Even though it is legal to hunt a bear, it is illegal to wake a bear for photo opportunities. (is shooting waking?) Fairbanks: It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose. (but why?) In Alaska it is illegal to whisper in someone''s ear while they are moose hunting. It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane. (How did the moose get in the flippin plane?) Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time. Moose may not be viewed from an airplane. State policy states that emergencies are held to a minimum and rarely found to exist. (*911* "we are sorry, this number has been disconnected")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a drive-by shooting in Chinatown? A cappuchino.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid, when you asked her for an evening gown, she came back with a night dress!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many snobby girls does it take to change a lightbulb? All of them, they try, break a nail, and come crying home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a bunny''s favorite type of dance? Hip Hop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do whales go to get their teeth checked? To the orcadontis!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Johnny''s math book sad? It had too many problems!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day after a birthday party at the jumper house, a young blond told her mother: Mommy, Mommy, I''m soooooo generous! When I was about to go into the jumpers, I found so many shoes and took them to the lost and found! Aren''t I soooooo generous?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey this is not a joke. Just submit a full smiley just for the heck of it. Wouldn''t it be weird if the top joke wasn''t even a joke? So please, just give it a full smiley. If you think this is just stupid, then, please give this crap a zero smiley.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: What are you doing? John: Taxes. Joe: Why? John: Because I have to...... Joe: That''s stupid. I did mine over a year ago.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was walking around town with a frog growing out of his head. Another man walks up to him and ask him, "What happened to you?" The frog answered, "Well, it started as a wart on my ass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy walks into his parents'' room and sees his parents having sex. "And you smack me for sucking on my thumb, Mommy?!?", the boy exclaims. A little boy asks his mom where babies come from. "Well from the stork," Mom replies. "So then who fucks the stork?", The kid asks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock- Knock Who''s There? Kenya Kenya Who? Kenya eat me out?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob: I''m going to go ride my spaceship. Jack: What''s a spaceship? Bob: Dunno, I''ll go invent it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man told the ringmaster that he was interested in joining the circus as a lion tamer. The ringmaster asked if he had any experience. The man said, "Why, yes. My father was one of the most famous lion tamers in the world, and he taught me everything he knew." "Really?" said the ringmaster. "Did he teach you how to make a lion jump through a flaming hoop?" "Yes he did," the man replied. "And did he teach you how to have six lions form a pyramid?" "Yes he did," the man replied. "And have you ever stuck your head in a lion''s mouth?" "Just once," the man replied. The ringmaster asked, "Why only once?" The man said, "I was looking for my father."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny comes back from school crying and says, "Mommy all the kids in the school say I have a big head." His mother replies, "No you don''t Johnny. You have a hideously deformed head. The other children are merely hiding the truth to protect your feelings."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a pet shop looking for an exotic pet. The owner tells the man, "we have iguanas...". The Man says, "No, I am looking for something really different. Everyone has iguanas, snakes, fish, and spiders!" The owner of the shop then tells the man that he has a talking centipede. The man gets excited; and says, "I''ll take it!" On the way home, the man tries to make small talk with the centipede; but he gets no response. He just figures the thing is shy. Once they get home, the man has an idea; and asks the centipede if he wants to go to the bar with him. No response. He gets agitated and taps the centipede''s box pretty hard. "I said; Do you want to go to the bar with me?!?!" After a couple of seconds, the centipede yells, "Hold on! I''m putting my fucking shoes on!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two jackrabbits are running from a pack of coyotes they manage to hide under a cactus. One says to the other: "Should we run for it, or wait till we outnumber ''em?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lovely young lady named Kim Went down to the river to swim A man in a punt Stuck an oar in her eye And now she has to wear glasses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Sometimes stays in bed until after 5 am. 9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women without bonnets. 8. Shows up at barn raisings in full ''KISS'' makeup. 7. When you criticize him, he yells, "Thou sucketh." 6. His name is Jebediah, but he goes by "Jeb Daddy." 5. Defiantly says, "If I had a radio, I''d listen to rap." 4. You come upon his secret stash of colored socks. 3. Uses slang expression, "Talk to the hand, ''cause the beard ain''t listening." 2. Was recently pulled over for driving under the influence of cottage cheese. AND THE #1 REASON YOU''LL KNOW YOUR TEENAGE AMISH SON IS IN TROUBLE IS: 1. He''s wearing his big black hat BACKWARDS!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man into a whorehouse. Once in the room with the prostitute, he puts $50 on the table and drops his pants. The hooker almost faints; the guy has a 18 inch cock. She says, "Hold on pal, I''ll lick it, I''ll suck it, but you''re not sticking that in me." The man pulls up his pants, picks up his $50, and says, "Screw that, I can do that myself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlah PAY ME LOTS MONEY Sign for pain here______________________', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With a man soon to celebrate his 50th wedding anniversary at the church''s marriage marathon, the minister asked Pete to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he managed to maintain his marriage with the same woman all these years. The husband replied to the audience, "Well, I treated her with respect, spent money on her, but mostly I took her traveling on special occasions." The minister inquired "Trips to where?" "For our 25th anniversary, I took her to Beijing, China." The minister then said, "What a terrific example you are to all husbands, Pete. Please tell the audience what you''re going to do for your wife on your 50th anniversary." Pete: "I''m going back to go get her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were in the bathroom getting ready for work when the husband looked at his wife and said, "I gotta have you!" He backed her up against the bathroom door, pulled down her panties and ravaged her. He knew he was doing great because she screamed and wiggled more than she ever had before. When he finished, he started putting his clothes back on when he noticed his wife still writhing against the door. He said, "That was the best honey. You''ve never moved like that before, you didn''t hurt yourself did you?" His wife replies, "No, no. I''ll be okay once I get the doorknob out of my ass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy asks his dad, "What is the difference between confident and confidential?" Dad says, "You are my son, I''m confident about that. Your friend over there is also my son; that''s confidential!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('jkfsh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that TGI Fridays is opening a new restaurant? "Yeah, it''s called WTF Mondays."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde dance in front of the traffic light? Because she thought she was in a disco.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl: "Have you ever been caught been wearing your mother''s bra? Boy: "No!" Girl: "So you have worn them but not been caught?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The GOP Congress will re-introduce drilling for oil in the Arctic. Republicans say the environmental effect is minimal; a study shows caribou do not make campaign contributions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: Hey Frank, what do you call an Iraqi on a plane? Frank: Hmm, terrorist bomber? Hell on air? Death on two wings? Joe: No, a pilot you racist!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A primary school teacher decided to see how many of the city kids knew what sounds farm animals made. She asked the kids to put their hands up if they knew the correct sound. "Who knows what sound a cow makes?" she asked. Cindy put her hand up and said "Moooo!" "Very good" replied the teacher,"what sound do sheep make?" "Baaaa" answered Jimmy. She continued this for a while. Then she asked, "What sound does a pig make?" All the hands in the class went up. She was surprised at the response. She chose Little Johnny at the back of the class. He stood up, took a deep breath, and screamed, "Up against the wall you son of a bitch!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Archimedes, you are late again. Don''t tell me that you were locked again in the bathroom. -Copernicus, when will you understand that you are not the center of the world? -Galileo, if you will drop stones from the top of the tower one more time, you will ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new principal was talking to the teachers. "Now, listen, my name is Mr. Prenis, with an "R". Please don''t forget to spell it out clearly, so that the students dont laugh and such..." The teachers assure him that they will remember it, and they go out to adress the students. One of the male teachers steps up to the podium, and speaks into the microphone: "Welcome, students, to another year at Rearview Elementary. I would like you to welcome your new principal, Mr. Crock..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are sitting in a bar. The one says to the other, "Are you going to the Johnsons'' tonight?" The other says, "Dunno, I don''t feel like it, but my wife wants to." "Yeah, me too, I don''t feel like it, but my wife insists." Both of them sigh deeply, look at each other and say: "All right then. See you at the Johnsons''!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On one side of the world, a man is given a blowjob by a 80-year-old woman. On the other side of the world, a stuntman attempts the unattemptable: Tiptoeing on a stretched cord between two skyscrapers. What are they both thinking? "Don''t look down, don''t look down, don''t look down, don''t look down..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An armless man in a long jacket walks into a bathroom and stands by a urinal... Soon seeing he needs help to use the toilet he asks a close by man, "Can you help me point my penis?" The man reluctantly accepted but decided not to look at the man''s penis. After a few seconds of holding it he thinks, "Hey! I''m grabbing it right? So I should look, I have a right" He looks down at the man''s member and sees that is beyond hideous. Startled, he jumps back and lets go, asking, "What the hell is wrong with it?" The "armless" man pulls his arms out of his jacket and says "I dunno, but I ain''t touchin'' it," and walks away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The drunk was floundering down the alley carrying a box with holes on the side. He bumped into a friend who asked, "What do you have in there, pal?" "A mongoose." "What for?" "Well, you know how drunk I can get. When I get drunk I see snakes, and I''m scared to death of snakes. That''s why I got this mongoose, for protection." "But," the friend said, "you idiot! Those are imaginary snakes." "That''s okay," said the drunk, showing his friend the interior of the box, "So is the mongoose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the nursing home to visit his 84 year-old father. While there he notices the nurse is giving his father hot chocolate and Viagra. The man asks, "Why are you doing that? I mean, at his age what will it do for him?" The nurse explains, "The hot chocolate will help him sleep." The man says, "And the Viagra?" "Keeps him from falling out of bed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest boy what he''d like to eat. "I''ll have some fuckin'' French toast," he says. The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs. She asks the middle child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more fuckin'' French toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away. Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast. "I don''t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don''t want the fuckin'' French toast."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hello, and welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2. If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6. If you are paranoid-delusional...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob: Did you get the tickets? Fred: What tickets? Bob: To the Gun Show! Well, let''s see now, I think they''re both pretty good, but...this one has it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('True Story: My aunt and her son were coming to our house to view an old slide show of London. Currently, my aunt has grey hair. In the slides she had black hair. My dad tells my cousin, "See, your mother doesn''t look old here." He replies, "Well, you can also see when the Hampton Court Palace was new."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob: How do you keep a turkey in suspense? Willie: I dunno. Bob: I''ll tell you later...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sven was in front of the mall jewellery store when he spied Ole walking past carrying a small, gift-wrapped package. "So vat did ja buy, Ole?" Ole replied, "Tomorrow is Lena''s birthday and she said she vanted something wit lots of diamonds." "So vat did you get her?" asked Sven. "A deck of cards!" replied Ole. - Editor: Ole''s funeral services will be held later this week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ah...all the good things we get out of electricity: the T.V., computer, coffee machine, lights, and much more. What happens when the electricity goes out? You stop complaining that you can''t watch T.V. or send an E-mail, and go buy battery-powered things!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is no job so simple that it cannot be done wrnog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knocked several times, but you weren''t in. - Opportunity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If an item is advertised as "under $50", you can bet it''s not $19.95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If flattery gets you nowhere, try bribery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If people listened to themselves more often, they would talk less.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If we learn by our mistakes, some of us are getting one great education!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men can live without air for a few minutes, without water for a few days, without food for about two months, and without new thoughts for years on end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student said to Professor Stigler: "Professor Stigler, I don''t believe I deserve this F you''ve given me." To which Stigler replied, "I agree, but unfortunately it is the lowest grade the University will allow me to award."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend of mine was a frequent user of a pay telephone at a popular truck stop, and was greatly inconvenienced when the phone went out of commission. Repeated requests for repair brought only promises. After several days, the phone company was again contacted and told that there was no longer a rush. The phone was now working fine - except that all money was being returned upon completion of each call. A repairman arrived within the hour!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A motorist, driving by a Texas ranch, hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. The driver went to the owner of the calf and explained what had happened. He then asked what the animal was worth. "Oh, about $200 today," said the rancher. "But in six years it would have been worth $900, so $900 is what I''m out." The motorist sat down and wrote out a check and handed it to the farmer. "Here," he said, "is the check for $900. It''s postdated six years from now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wealthy investor walked into a bank and said to the bank manager, "I would like to speak with Mr. Reginald Jones, whom I understand is a tried and trusted employee of yours." The banker said, "Yes, he certainly was trusted, and he will be tried as soon as we catch him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple who lived together were talking one day, trying to figure out how to entertain themselves on a rainy day. "Let''s play Hide and Seek," said the woman. "I''ll hide and if you find me we''ll have sex!" "But what if I can''t find you?" asked her boyfriend. "I''ll be behind the piano," she said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The stockbroker received notice from the IRS that he was being audited. He showed up at the appointed time and place with all his financial records, then sat for what seemed like hours as the accountant pored over them. Finally the IRS agent looked up and commented, "You must have been a tremendous fan of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle." "Why would you say that?" wondered the broker. "Because you''ve made more brilliant deductions on your last three returns than Sherlock Holmes made in his entire career."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Polish guys were taking their first train trip to Warsaw on the train. A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas which they''d never seen before. Each bought one. The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, he looked across to his friend and said, "I wouldn''t eat that if I were you." "Why not?" "I took one bite and went blind for half a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Original Lyric Put your left foot in, Your left foot out, Your left foot in, And shake it all about. You do the hokey pokey, And turn yourself around That''s what it''s all about. Shakespearean Style. O proud left foot, that ventures quick within, Then soon upon a backward journey lithe. Anon, once more the gesture, then begin: Command sinistral pedestal to writhe. Commence thou then the fervid Hokey-Poke; A mad gyration, hips in wanton swirl. To spin! A wilde release from heaven''s yoke. Blessed dervish! Surely canst go, girl. The Hoke, the poke - banish now thy doubt. Verily, I say, ''tis what it''s all about.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From Harper''s Magazine: Amount of pizza eaten each day in U.S. (acres): 75.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On April Fools Day, a mother put a fire cracker under the pancakes. She blew her stack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This last weekend I was reminded at the pace we are converting to metric. I was on I-75 in Ohio when I saw a sign that said: All signs metric - Next 20 miles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Leonid Brezhnev, a former ruler of Russia, was thought not to be too bright. He comes to address a big Communist party meeting, and starts: "Dear Comrade Imperialists," The whole hall perked up - "what did he say?" Brezhnev tried again... "Dear Comrade Imperialists," Well, by now the hall was in pandemonium - was he trying to call them Imperialists? Then, an advisor walked over to the podium and pointed to the speech for Brezhnev. "Oh..." he muttered, and started again: "Dear Comrades, Imperialists are everywhere."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of my husband''s duties as a novice drill instructor at Fort Jackson, S.C., was to escort new recruits to the mess hall. After everyone had made it through the chow line, he sat them down and told them, "There are three rules in this mess hall: Shut up! Eat up! Get up!" Checking to see that he had everyone''s attention, he asked, "What is the first rule?" Much to the amusement of the other instructors, 60 privates yelled in unison, "Shut up, Drill Sergeant!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s There. Pick up. Pick up Who? Pick up your truck and I''ll grab the money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Your local ambulance has a trailer hitch. - You watch cartoons long after your kids get bored. - You think the French Riviera is a foreign car. - You think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard. - You''re still sca', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The wise old Mother Superior from county Tipperary was dying. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her comfortable. They gave her some warm milk to drink, but she refused it. Then one nun took the glass back to the kitchen. Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey they had received as a gift the previous Christmas, she opened and poured a generous amount into the warm milk. When she walked back at Mother Superior''s bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother drank a little, then a little more. Before they knew it, she had drunk the whole glass down to the last drop. "Mother," the nuns asked with earnest, "please give us some wisdom before you die." She raised herself up in bed with a pious look on her face and said, "Don''t sell that cow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teenage son was having trouble mastering the fine points of balancing his new checking account. "The bank returned the check you wrote to the sporting goods store," his mother said. "Oh good," he replied, "Now I can use it to buy some stereo equipment!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been married for 45 years and had raised a brood of 11 children and were blessed with 22 grandchildren. When asked the secret for staying together all that time, the wife replies, "Many years ago we made a promise to each other: the first one to pack up and leave has to take all the kids."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma''s teeth are so yellow, that when she opened her mouth, a black guy said "nice grillz!" Your momma''s so fat ''n hairy that when she went to the mueseum someone yelled "the mammoth''s alive!" Your momma''s so hairy that when she was on the set of king kong, the director said "I thought I only ordered 1 gorrila!" Your momma''s so old and gassy that when she farted the dinasours became extinct! Your momma''s so stupid that they invented the books for dummys just for her! Your momma''s so skinny that god used her to clean his teeth! Your momma''s so ugly that when she stepped out of her house, people ran away saying "I didn''t know they were shooting a horror movie here!" Your momma''s so ugly that when walked down her street someone said "lady, halloween was yesterday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After all is said and done, usually more is said than done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A clean tie attracts the soup of the day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t lend people money...it gives them amnesia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy comes home from school saying, "3rd grade math has way bigger numbers than 2nd grade!" His dad replies, "Don''t worry, when you start getting a paycheck they get smaller again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you use your rollaway tool box for your bedroom dresser. If you are afraid to mow your lawn because you might find out where Grandma''s been for the last two months.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All inanimate objects can move just enough to get in your way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Any wire cut to length will be too short.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blessed is he who expects no gratitude, for he shall not be disappointed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly when she walks in a room mice jump on chairs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be content with what you''ve got, but be sure you''ve got plenty of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The chance of forgetting something is directly proportional to...to...uhh...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not what you say, but the way you say it. On a blind date, the boy said to the girl: "Time stands still when I look into your eyes." The girl was very flattered. What the boy had really meant was, "You have a face that would stop a clock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of the greatest labor-saving inventions today is tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two kinds of people who don''t say much: those who are quiet and those who talk a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter what happens, there is always somebody who knew that it would.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Policeman: "When I saw you coming around the corner, I said to myself, `fifty-five at least.''" Woman driver: "Well, you are a long way off! It''s this hat that makes me look so old!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a dangerous virus being passed around electronically, orally, and by hand. This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life completely. If you should come into contact with WORK, put your jacket on and take two good friends to the nearest grocery store. Purchase the antidote known as Work-Isolating-Neutralizer-Extract (WINE) or Bothersome-Employer-Elimination-Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system. You should forward this warning to five friends. If you do not have five friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest was preparing a man for his long journey into the night. Whispering firmly, the priest said, "Denounce the devil! Let him know how little you think of his evil." The dying man said nothing. The priest repeated his order. Still the dying man said nothing. The priest asked, "Why do you refuse to denounce the devil and his evil?" The dying man said, "Until I know where I''m heading, I don''t think I ought to aggravate anybody."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What''ve you got in your truck?" "Fertilizer," the farmer replied. "What are you going to do with it?" asked the little boy. "Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer. "You ought to live here," the little boy advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The road by my house was in bad condition. Every day, I dodged potholes on the way to work, so I was relieved to see a construction crew working on the road one morning. Later, on my way home, I noticed the men were gone and no improvement in the road. Where the crew had been working stood a new, bright-yellow sign with the words, "Rough Road."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two rules for success in life: Rule 1 - Don''t tell people everything you know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that there are so many more horses'' asses than there are horses? - G. Gordon Liddy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can fool all of the people some of the time, some of the people all of the time, and that should be sufficient for most purposes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can make a fool of yourself any time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think it''s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman from Chelm went to the market one day to buy herring and a loaf of bread. "How much is it?" she asked the storekeeper. "14 cents," answered the storekeeper to the lady. "14 cents! For what?" asked the lady. The storekeeper explained: "The herring costs 7 cents, and the loaf of bread costs 7 cents also. So together it comes to 14 cents." "I know different. To the best of my recollection, 7 and 7 is 11." "What are you saying?" "As far as I know, 7 and 7 is 11. I had already had 4 children when my first husband died. When I married a second time, my second husband also had 4 children from his first wife. After getting married, we had 3 children together. So each of us had 7 children, and together we had 11! Obviously, 7 and 7 is 11."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old men were arguing the merits of their doctors. The first one said, "I don''t trust your fancy doctor. He treated old Jake Waxman for a kidney ailment for nearly a year, and then Jake died of a liver ailment." "So what makes you think your doctor is any better?" asked his friend. "Because when my doctor treats you for a kidney ailment, you can be sure you''ll die of a kidney ailment."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend and I stayed at a Chicago hotel while attending a convention. Since we weren''t used to the big city, we were overly concerned about security. The first night we placed a chair against the door and stacked our luggage on it. To complete the barricade, we put the trash can on top. If an intruder tried to break in, we''d be sure to hear him. Around 1 a.m. there was a knock on the door. "Who is it?" my friend asked nervously. "Honey," a woman on the other side yelled, "you left your key in the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is sitting on a bench in the park reading a newspaper. Suddenly he throws the paper onto the ground and yells, "All politicians are assholes." A man sitting next to him in a finely pressed suit says, "I take offense to that!" The pissed-off guy asks him, "Why? Are you a politician?" "No," he replies, "I''m an asshole."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the university, the lecturers were entering their classes. Meanwhile, the students were doing their own stuff. When the lecturer said,"Class, attention please!" all of them still did something else. Of course they didn''t pay attention because the lecturer asked the CLASS to pay attention!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend and I were in a record store to buy a 45-speed record of his favourite song. After he located it, he realized that he had forgotten his wallet. Instead of going out and getting his wallet, he decided to get a five-finger discount (shoplift) so he put it down his pants. Well, as we were leaving the store, the cashier stopped him and said, "Excuse me, but is that a record in your pants?" To this he responded, "It may not be a record, but I''m mighty proud of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overweight is something that just sort of snacks up on you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four teenagers were arrested in the parking lot of a large mall in Lakeland, Fla. just before Christmas. In an attempt to steal an automobile at random, they tried to break into a police van containing three officers on a stakeout.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A co-worker of mine fielded phone calls from his Alumni Association every three months for about five years, ostensibly checking to see that his records were up to date, and coincidentally asking if he''d like to donate to the Alumni Association. Once, when checking his records, the employee asked, "Is xxx-xxxx your current phone number?" Seeing his opportunity, he answered no, and made up a new phone number. He hasn''t heard from them since.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The song, "Yankee Doodle" was originally sung by British soldiers to insult the colonialists (which was typical of the British in those days). The Continental Army took to singing it to annoy the British (which was typical of the colonialists).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('St. Paul, MN The hit movie "Home Alone" about a boy thwarting burglars with imaginative mayhem, wasn''t total fantasy. Just ask the guy who tried to break in while 13-year-old Ryan Hendrickson was home alone. Ryan was watching television Wednesday night when he heard a noise that sounded like a window screen being cut. "I ran to the closet and grabbed a bat," Ryan said Thursday. "I went...into the dining room, where I saw him cutting the window with a knife. He put his left hand in first and I was waiting for his right hand to come in...and I took the baseball bat and I hit him as hard as I could." The man ran. Ryan called 911. Police, while cautioning Ryan to call 911 first next time, did enjoy the fact that the kid got in the first lick against a bad guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New York, NY Police across the nation are warning people who wear pagers to be on the lookout for the latest scam. According to police, pagers in several states have been beeped by a number displaying a 212 area code (New York) and the prefix 540. When the victims return the call, they are charged $55 on their phone bill. The call the respondent makes has been electronically linked into a 900 "pay-per-call" system which allows the charge to be added to the phone bill. "People will look at the number and say ''Gee, who is calling me from out of state? It must be important,''" said an investigator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bellevue, WA There''s a story circulating through the Bellevue School District about the woman who called wanting information on home schooling. Both Lake Washington (Renton, WA) and Bellevue districts are noted for their support of home schoolers, and the Bellevue spokesperson was explaining procedures and what to do to the mother on the telephone. Among other things, the mother needed to file a declaration of intent, a kind of home school registration. The spokeswoman offered to send out the proper form. The mother gave a Renton address. The spokeswoman suggested registering the children in her home district in Renton, the Lake Washington School District. "No way," said the mother. "Everyone knows Bellevue schools are much better than Renton schools."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kenneth Jeffries, 24, was arrested in West Haven, Conn., in August for robbing a convenience store. Police reported that he had first offered the clerk $1 for a pack of gum as a ruse and then taken $40 in the robbery. However, said police, Jeffries returned a minute later and asked, uncertainly, "Did I pay for the gum?" By that time the clerk had summoned police, and Jeffries was soon apprehended.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three roommates: a blonde, brunette, and redhead all go out on dates one night. When they get back in the blonde says, "You know you''ve been on a good date when your make-up is all smeared!" The brunette says, "No, no, you know you''ve been on a good date when you come home and your hair is all messed up." The redhead doesn''t say anything she just reaches up under her skirt, pulls off her panties, and throws them against the wall, where they stick, and says, "NOW THAT''S A GOOD DATE!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, what did one Bowling pin say to the other Bowling pin? ............................ Hey, you''re a knock out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a pretty lady was driving through the desert and her car broke down. In the distance, she sees an indian riding a horse. He rides over to her and offers her a lift to the nearest gas station and she happily accepts. On the way to the gas station, the indian would let out a, "Woo Hoo, Yipee!" every few seconds. The lady just figured that he was being an Indian and ignored it. When they finally got to the gas station and the Indian had left, the guy that worked at the gas station asked, "What was his problem?" The lady responded, "I don''t know, I was just holding onto his saddle horn." The guy replied, "Lady, Indians don''t use saddles!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the magic car? It turned into a driveway!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My health teacher said once he was talking to this one guy and a student. As they were talking the student got curious and asked, "How long have you been teaching here?" My health teachser replied, "Oh about 37 years." The student said he must be old and the other guy, who is elderly as well says, "Ya, and Jesus still owes me a buck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Price Chopper employees does it take to wash a table? Three; one to wash it and two to supervise.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I''m canoeing up a tree, how many cupcakes does it take to get to the moon? None, since vests don''t have sleeves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Hubluzas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? There is no lightbulb!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit? Are children who act in rated ''R'' movies allowed to see them? Can you make a candle out of your earwax? When French people swear do they say pardon my English? Aren''t the ''good things that come to those who wait'' just the leftovers from the people that got there first? If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later? Can a fire truck park in the fire lane? Can it be cloudy and foggy at the same time? "Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute? Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time? Are marbles made of marble? Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup? If you pay for a vacation and your plane crashes on the way there, do you get you money back? (Granted you lived) Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think that''s how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York said, "Gee, I''m enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn''t cold enough. Let''s go west."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rhett Jacobs, Democratic candidate for the South Carolina House and a man who listed "education" as his top priority, submitted a required campaign disclosure form in October, handwritten, on which he detailed expenses for "filling fee," "campain work" and "litature."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the plane was flying low over hills near Athens, a lady asked the stewardess: "What''s that stuff on those hills?" "Just snow," replied the stewardess. "That''s what I thought," said the lady, "but this fellow in front of me said it was Greece."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, someone phoned Central Manhattan Office. Caller: Good afternoon. I''m John Smith. Operator: GOOD AFTERNOON! CAN I HELP YOU? Caller: Who are you? Why are you so rude? Operator: WHO ARE YOU LOOKING FOR? Caller: I am looking for my sister, Gabrielle Smith. She works here, right? Operator: SHE IS IN THE TOILET! Caller: Okay. Now I want to know who you are. Why are you so rude? Operator: I''M SAW LEE! Caller: Oh, you should be sorry because you are so rude! Then the caller hung up the phone. *Try to pronounce "SAW LEE". It sounds like "SORRY", right?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This story is true. I heard my brother tell it to my cousins when we went out spotlighting. Well my brother and 2 of his friends were drunk. One of my brothers friends were so drunk he passed out. I forget what he landed on, but the power went out. The blond comes screaming "What''s happening??!!" my brother and his other friend reply,"The house is falling down!!" So the blond runs to the door and pushes up on the doorway, and turns beet red. I don''t know the erst of the story because my brother had just remembered I was in the car. He knew I would tell mom everything he said that was bad because I''m 12.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Buy company, fire them. Beware of machine guns.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good friends are the ones who will bail you out of jail. But... TRUE friends are the ones who wil be sitting next to you in prison and say, "You know, we sure messed up there, buddy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer in Basic Math class "What is two plus two?" "Well, first let us decide the parties. The first two is party A. Now first, where are the signatures that my client two WANTS to be added to the party B, two. I see no signatures, and therefore the two twos shan''t be together until further paperwork is done. Two and two remain separate, CASE CLOSED!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a sperm bank treat its donors? On a first come, first serve basis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat and so pale white, when they landed on her they said "This is one small step for man, and one fat leap for mankind!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For those of you who do not know, a stroop test is where you say the color of the word, but not the word itself(and the words are spelling out colors). One day there was a blonde. She saw stroop tests and found them fun. One day she was on a radio show. She said she was a fan of stroop tests and said she''d give the audience one. She explained what it was. "Blue" "Red" "Green" The first to call and give the answers would win a cash prize. Someone called in. "YOU MORON! YOU CANT SPEAK A STROOP TEST!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A U.S. Mint spokesperson announced the plans for a new fifty-cent piece that was being issued in the honor of two great American patriots. On one side of the coin would be Theodore Roosevelt, on the other, Nathan Hale. When questioned by a reporter why two people were going to appear on the same coin, the spokesperson replied, "These two men were selected to simplify life for a vast majority of Americans." The reporter then asked, "Could you explain how this would simplify life for Americans?" The official responded, "Certainly, I''d be happy to. Now, when they toss a coin, they can simply call Ted''s or Hale''s."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The businessman dragged himself home and barely made it to his chair before he dropped, exhausted. His sympathetic wife was right there with a tall cool drink and a comforting word. "My, you look tired," she said. "You must have had a hard day today. What happened to make you so exhausted?" "It was terrible," her husband said, "The computer broke down and all of us had to do our own thinking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A number twelve walks into a bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer. "Sorry I can''t serve you," states the barman. "Why not?!" asks the number twelve with anger showing in its voice. "You''re under 21," replies the barman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cow cross the street? To get to the udder side!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a one-legged lady? Eileen!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which animal has no teeth? A gummy bear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This man comes home feeling pretty frisky after partying with his buddies half the night. He walks into the bedroom where his wife is still waiting up for him. He takes off all of his clothes and says, "Baby, you are looking at 200 pounds of dynamite." His wife opens the window and yells, "Everybody run for your lives, there''s 200 pounds of dynamite in my bedroom, and it only has a three inch fuse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American manufacturer is showing his machine factory to a potential customer from Albania. At noon, when the lunch whistle blows, two thousand men and women immediately stop work and leave the building. "Your workers, they''re escaping!" cries the visitor. "You''ve got to stop them." "Don''t worry, they''ll be back," says the American. And indeed, at exactly one o''clock the whistle blows again, and all the workers return from their break. When the tour is over, the manufacturer turns to his guest and says, "Well, now, which of these machines would you like to order?" "Forget the machines," says the visitor. "How much do you want for that whistle?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large, raging violent river. Needing to get on the other side, the first man prayed, "God, please give me the strength to cross the river." Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours, having almost drowned twice. After witnessing that, the second man prayed, "God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river." Poof! God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs and he was able to row across in about an hour after almost capsizing once. Seeing what happened to the first two men, the third man prayed, "God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river." Poof! He was turned into a woman. She checked the map, hiked one hundred yards up stream and walked across the bridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid she tried to drown a fish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell an elephant from an ant? An ant is easier to pick up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell when a blonde is having a bad day? She has her tampon behind her ear and she cant find her pencil!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do bald men put holes in their pockets? So they can run their fingers through their hair!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you know when a blonde is on her period? A: She only has on one sock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner. After some wheeling and dealing, they settled for $10,000 for the duck and the pot. Three days later the circus owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your duck is a ripoff! I put him on the pot before a whole audience, and he didn''t dance a single step!" "So?" asked the duck''s former owner, "did you remember to light the candle under the pot?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who smelled like a distillery flopped on a subway seat next to a priest. The man''s tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes, the disheveled guy turned to the priest and asked, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?" "Mister, it''s caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow man." "Well I''ll be," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper. The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. "I''m very sorry. I didn''t mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?" "I don''t have it, Father; I was just reading here that the Pope does."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A regular at Bob''s Bar came in one evening sporting a matched pair of swollen black eyes that appeared extremely painful. "Whoa, Sam!" said the bartender. "Who gave those beauties to you?" "Nobody gave them to me," said Sam. "I had to fight like crazy for both of them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the aliens hurt the farmer? They trod on his corn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An office technician got a call from a blonde. The blonde told the tech that her computer was not working. She described the problem and the tech concluded that the computer needed to be brought in and serviced. He told her to "Unplug the power cord and bring it up here and I will fix it." About fifteen minutes later she shows up at his door with the power cord in her hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had been drinking at the bar for hours when he mentioned something about his girlfriend being out in the car. The bartender, concerned because it was so cold, went to check on her. When he looked inside the car, he saw the man''s friend, Dave, and his girlfriend kissing one another. The bartender shook his head and walked back inside. He told the drunk that he thought it might be a good idea to check on his girlfriend. The fellow staggered outside to the car, saw his buddy and his girlfriend kissing, then walked back into the bar laughing. "What''s so funny?" the bartender asked. "That stupid Dave!" the fellow chortled, "He''s so drunk, he thinks he''s me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyers are safe from the threat of automation taking over their professions. No one would build a robot to do nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two deaf men were in a coffee shop discussing their wives. One signs to the other, ''Boy was my wife mad at me last night. She went on and on and wouldn''t stop!'' The other Buddy says, ''When my wife goes off on me I just don''t listen.'' ''How do you do that?'' says the other. ''It''s easy! I turn off the light!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Private Loyds was brought up before the unit CO for some offense. "You can take your choice, private - one month''s restriction or twenty days'' pay," said the officer. "All right, sir," said the bright soldier, "I''ll take the money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: Doctor, what I need is something to stir me up; something to put me in a fighting mood. Did you put something like that in this prescription? Doctor: No need for that. You will find that in your bill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police car pulled me over near the high school where I teach. As the officer asked for my license and registration, my students began to drive past. Some honked their horns, others hooted, and still others stopped to admonish me for speeding. Finally the officer asked me if I was a teacher at the school, and I told him I was. "I think you''ve paid your debt to society," he said with a smile, and left without giving me a ticket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Schwarznegger has a big one, Michael J. Fox has a small one, Madonna doesn''t have one, The POPE has one but doesn''t use it, Clinton uses his all the time, Mickey Mouse has an unusual one, George Burns'' was hot, Liberace NEVER used his on women, Jerry Seinfeld is very very proud of his, We never saw Lucy use Desi''s. What is it? A last name....... Were you thinking of something else?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Astronomers were excited this week at having isolated a brief sound which occurred immediately before the Big Bang. Apparently, that sound was "Uh oh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the bus pulled away, I realized I had left my purse under the seat. Later, I called the company and was relieved that the driver had found my bag. When I went to pick it up, several off-duty bus drivers surrounded me. One man handed me my pocketbook, two typewritten pages and a box containing the contents of my purse. "We''re required to inventory lost wallets and purses," he explained. "I think you''ll find everything there." As I started to put my belongings back into the pocketbook, the man continued, "I hope you don''t mind if we watch. Even though we all tried, none of us could fit everything into your purse - and we''d like to see just how you do it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid: Mom, can i get the hot lunch tomorrow? Mom: What are they serving? Kid: Swiss steak. Pleeeeeease? Mom: Okay! Okay! I didn''t know you liked Swiss steak so much. Kid: Oh, yeah! It sticks to the ceiling WAY better than the lasagna.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A salesman, tired of his job, gave it up to become a policeman. Several months later, a friend asked him how he liked his new role. "Well," he replied, "the pay is good and the hours aren''t bad, but what I like best is that the customer is always wrong."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dave went on a business trip for a few days. When he returned, his wife reported that the dog really missed him. "She spent every night at the front door, waiting for you to come home," she said. "What an example of devotion," Dave replied. "I wonder if you''d be that concerned about me?" "Honey," she answered, "if you were gone overnight, and I didn''t know where you were, you can be sure I''d be waiting for you at the front door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- You have a Hefty bag for a convertible top. - Your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds. - You have an Elvis Jell-o mold. - You own more cowboy boots than sneakers. - You''ve been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars. - You have a pic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The orthopedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new office, and his staff was helping transport many of the items. I sat the display skeleton in the front of my car, and had fastened the seatbelt around it to stop it falling over. I hadn''t considered the drive across town. At one traffic light, the stares of the people in the car beside me became obvious, and I looked across and explained, "I''m delivering him to my doctor''s office." The other driver leaned out of his window. "I hate to tell you, man," he said, "but I think it''s too late!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an eagle with a jeep and a dog? A flying car-pet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nine cats were on a boat. One jumped off. How many were left? None. They were all copy-cats!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A poor man walks into a bar. Another man sat down 2 feet away from him, and pulled out a wad of $50s from his wallet. The poor man got an idea. He tells the rich man, "I have a special talent. I bet you all the money in your wallet I can sing a song with any woman''s name in it." The rich man laughed. "Alright. How about my wife''s name, Joanne Skyler Thomas?" What does the poor man sing? -_-_-_-_-_-_-_- Answer: "Happy Birthday" It''s a real song, and can have anyone''s name in it. The poor man walks away rich. The rich man walks away poor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting larger. Then it hit me...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country. March Planned For Next August Blind Bishop Appointed To See Lingerie Shipment Hijacked - Thief Gives Police The Slip L.A. Voters Approve Urban Renewal By Landslide Patient At Death''s Door - Doctors Pull Him Through Latin Course To Be Canceled - No Interest Among Students, Et Al. Diaper Market Bottoms Out Croupiers On Strike - Management: "No Big Deal" Stadium Air Conditioning Fails - Fans Protest', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country. Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped Lawyers Give Poor Free Legal Advice Fund Set Up for Beating Victim''s Kin Cancer Society Honors Marlboro Man Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe Out Literacy Autos Killing 110 a Day - Let''s Resolve to Do Better 20-Year Friendship Ends at Altar Half of U.S. High Schools Require Some Study for Graduation Blind Woman Gets New Kidney from Dad She Hasn''t Seen in Years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CLASSIFIED ERRORS, from a small-town daily: (Monday) FOR SALE - R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Phone 555-0707 after 7 p.m. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap. (Tuesday) NOTICE - We regret having erred in R. D. Jones'' ad yesterday. It should have read: One sewing machine for sale. Cheap: 555-0707 and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him after 7 p.m. (Wednesday) NOTICE - R. D. Jones has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in his classified ad yesterday. His ad stands corrected as follows: FOR SALE - R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Cheap. Phone 555-0707 and ask Mrs. Kelly who loves with him. (Thursday) NOTICE - I, R. D. Jones, have NO sewing machine for sale. I SMASHED IT. Don''t call 555-0707, as the telephone has been disconnected. I have NOT been carrying on with Mrs. Kelly. Until yesterday she was my housekeeper, but she quit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the fish expelled from school? He was caught with seaweed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you''re swimming in the creek, and an eel bites your cheek, that''s a moray!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you''re just sitting there, staring at carpeting?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The trouble with doing nothing is that you never know when you are finished.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the tent agree to stand up all night? He was roped into it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the big knot give the little knot a time-out? It was being knotty!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Actual online ad: $10,000 06'' Suzuki GSXR 1000 Farmington, UT 84025 - Aug 7, 2006 2006 Suzuki 1000. This bike is perfect! It has 1000 miles and has had its 500 mile dealer service. (Expensive) It''s been adult ridden, all wheels have always been on the ground. I use it as a cruiser/commuter. I''m selling it because it was purchased without the proper consent of a loving wife. Apparently "do whatever the f*** you want" doesn''t mean what I thought. Call Pete, (xxx)xxx-xxxx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, "Do you want to go to heaven?" The man said, "I do, Father." The priest said, "Then stand over there against the wall." Then the priest asked the second man, "Do you want to got to heaven?" "Certainly, Father," was the man''s reply. "Then stand over there against the wall," said the priest. Then Father Murphy walked up to O''Toole and said, "Do you want to go to heaven?" O''Toole said, "No, I don''t Father." The priest said, "I don''t believe this. You mean to tell me that when you die you don''t want to go to heaven?" O''Toole said, "Oh, when I die, yes. I thought you were getting a group together to go right now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who had been caught embezzling millions from his employer went to a lawyer seeking defense. He didn''t want to go to jail, but his lawyer told him, "Don''t worry. You''ll never have to go to jail with all that money." The lawyer was right. When the man was sent to prison, he didn''t have a dime.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer named Impos Syble was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it. "Here lies an honest man and a lawyer," responded the lawyer. "Sorry, but I can''t do that," replied the stonecutter. "In this state, it''s against the law to bury two people in the same grave. However, I could put `here lies an honest lawyer''." "But that won''t let people know who it is!" protested the lawyer. "Sure it will," retorted the stonecutter. "People will read it and exclaim, "That''s impossible!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer calls his client to tell him about his fee schedule. "Alright," the lawyer says, looking through his papers. "You owe me $1000 down and $417.58 cents each month for the next thirty-six months." "What? That sounds like a car payment schedule," retorted the client. "You''re right. It''s mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyer: "Now that you have been acquitted, will you tell me truly? Did you steal the car?" Client: "After hearing your amazing argument in court this morning, I''m beginning to think I didn''t."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can I ever thank you? gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubles. "My dear woman," Darrow replied, "ever since the Phoenicians invented money there has been only one answer to that question."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris has two speeds - walk and kill. Chuck Norris sold law and order for using the names of his arms and legs. Chuck Norris hides his third arm underneath his beards. When Chuck Norris does a push up he is not pushing himself up, he is pushing the world down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was about to have a set of triplets. While in the womb, the triplets were trying to figure out what they wanted to be when they grew up. The first one said that he wanted to be an electrician, and the others asked him why. He said, "So I can get some light in this place." The second one said that he wanted to be a plumber, because their house was flooded. The third said that he wanted to be a trapper. The other two asked him why he wanted to do that and he said "So I can catch that damn weasel that keeps poking its head in and out of here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a nun that becomes an attorney? Sister in law!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At an exhibition of military painting a visitor was admiring a picture. "What a great realist that painter is!" he exclaimed. "What painter?" "The one that painted this picture ''Soldiers at Work''." "Yes, hut something is wrong there. Those soldiers aren''t working at all!" "That is just the greatest stroke of realism in the picture!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: What is the axis of the earth? Student: The axis of the earth is an imaginary line which passes from one pole to the other, and on which the earth revolves. Teacher: Very good. Now, could you hang clothes on that line? Student: Yes, Sir. Teacher: Indeed, and what sort of clothes? Student: Imaginary clothes, Sir.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man saw a very tired infantryman resting after a hard foot march. The man said with disdain: "When I was of your age I thought nothing of a ten-mile hike." "Well, I don''t think much of it either," replied the GI.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb? Into what?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two maggots were playing billiards. One says, "I''m bored." The other replies, "Beats fishing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t a dalmatian puppy hide from his mom? ''Cause he''s already been spotted!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My husband, being unhappy with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods. We''ve discovered that when I''m in a good mood it turns green. But when I''m in a bad mood it leaves a big red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time the cheap bastard will buy me a diamond!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A State Police colleague of mine once received a call from a woman who asked him how to baste a turkey. After a stunned moment, he, being a fairly good cook, described the procedure. Then he asked, "But why would you call the State Police to find out how to baste a turkey?" There was only a slight hesitation before she replied, "Well, you knew, didn''t you?" and hung up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man passed out in a dead faint as he came out of his front door onto the porch. Someone called 911. When the paramedics arrived, they helped him regain consciousness and asked if he knew what caused him to faint. "It was enough to make anybody faint," he said. "My son asked me for the keys to the garage, and instead of driving the car out, he came out with the lawn mower!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newspaper reporter was writing a feature story about prison life and was interviewing one of the prisoners. "Do you watch much television here?" "Only the daytime shows," the inmate said. "At night we''re locked in our cells and don''t see any television." "That''s too bad," the reporter said, "But I do think it is nice that the warden lets you watch it in the daytime." "What do you mean, nice?" the inmate said. "That''s part of the punishment."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After directory assistance gave me my boyfriend''s new telephone number, I dialed him -- and got a woman. "Is Mike there?" I asked. "He''s in the shower," she responded. "Please tell him his girlfriend called," I said and hung up. When he didn''t return the call, I dialed again. This time a man answered. "This is Mike," he said. "You''re not my boyfriend!" I exclaimed. "I know," he replied. "That''s what I''ve been trying to tell my wife for the past half-hour."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s no good, sir, said the hopeless pupil to his English teacher. "I try to learn, but everything you say goes in both ears and out the other." "Goes in both ears and out the other?" asked the puzzled teacher. "But you only have two ears." "You see, sir? I''m no good at math, either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Haiku are funny But sometimes they don''t make sense Refrigerator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never smack a man who''s chewin'' tobacco.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To keep your marriage brimming With love in the marriage cup, Whenever you''re wrong, admit it; Whenever you''re right, shut up. - Nash', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends. "The man I marry must be a shining light amongst company. He must be musical, tell jokes, sing - and stay home at night!" An old granny overheard and spoke up, "Honey, if that''s all you want, get a television!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For thirty years, Johnson had arrived at work at 9 a.m. on the dot; he had never missed a day and was never late. Consequently, when on one particular day 9 a.m. passed without Johnson''s arrival, it caused a sensation. All work ceased, and the boss himself, looking at his watch and muttering, came out into the corridor. Finally, precisely at ten, Johnson showed up, clothes dusty and torn, his face scratched and bruised, his glasses bent. He limped painfully to the time clock, punched in, and said, aware that all eyes were upon him, "I tripped and rolled down two flights of stairs in the subway - nearly killed myself." The boss said, "And to roll down two flights of stairs took you a whole hour?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A musical director was having a lot of trouble with one drummer. He talked and talked and talked with the drummer, but his performance simply didn''t improve. Finally, before the whole orchestra, he said, "When a musician just can''t handle his instrument and doesn''t improve when given help, they take away the instrument, and give him two sticks, and make him a drummer." A stage whisper was heard from the percussion section: "And if he can''t handle even that, they take away one of his sticks and make him a conductor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Airman Jones was assigned to the induction center where he was to advise new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance. It wasn''t long before Captain Smith noticed that Airman Jones had almost a 100% record for insurance sales, something that had never happened before. Rather than ask about this, the Captain stood in the back of the room and listened to Jones''s sales pitch. Jones explained the basics of the GI Insurance to the new recruits, and then said: "If you have GI Insurance and go into battle and are killed, the government has to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries. If you don''t have GI insurance, and you go into battle and get killed, the government has to pay only a maximum of $6000." "Now," he concluded, "which bunch do you think they are going to send into battle first?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It might look like I''m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I''m really quite busy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someday, we''ll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Know It''s Your Last Day At Work When...... You hand a bank teller an envelope, and when she asks, "What''s this?", you realize you just dropped the company''s deposit in a mailbox. A woman comes into the store, you turn to the other salesman and say, "I waited on the last fat ugly old lady. This one''s your turn". Your boss is standing behind you. It''s his wife. While your boss is at lunch, you sneak in and look at some confidential information on his computer. You spill coffee on the keyboard. It shorts out. You return from a week''s vacation to find that you had scheduled *this* week as vacation, not last week. You take a "sick" day. The next morning the boss asks you, "So, how was the fishing on Rock Creek yesterday?" You wake up hung over. You have a black eye and barked knuckles. You''re in jail. Last night was the company Christmas party.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This reminds me of something yesterday at work. A colleague was relating a conversation he had with his young daughter, just a bit over 2 years old. They were discussing geography and... "Where does mommy live?" "Minneapolis." "Where does grandma live?" "Baltimore." "Where does grandpa live?" "Baltimore." "And where does daddy live?" "At work!" Needless to say, he took the next day off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chapters In The "Nascar For Dummies" Book: How To Read It''s Impossible to Own Too Much Dale Earnhardt Memorabilia Jumpin'', Hollerin'' & Other Ways to Make Sure Your Favorite Driver Sees You When He Goes By at 230 Miles An Hour Roll Down Yer Winder First, *Then* Spit So You Wanna Be A Crew Chief? Remember - Righty-Tighty, Lefty-Loosy Better Places to Put the Grill Than Next to the Winnebago''s Propane Tank Brakes Are For Sissies Advanced Technical Terms - "Yeeeehaww!" "Whoooodoggie!" and "Golldurn!" How To Say "Dick Trickle" Without Snickering Quick Prayers for Those Upside-Down Moments How to Drive in a Circle 500 Times Without Getting Dizzy Them Cars Are Fast - And LOUD!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two girls board a crowded bus and one of them whispers to the other, "Watch me embarrass a man into giving me his seat." Pushing her way through the crowd, she turned all of her charms upon a gentleman who looked like he might embarrass easily. "My dear Mr. Wilson," she gushed, "fancy meeting you here on the bus. Am I glad to see you! Why, you''re almost a stranger. My, but I''m tired!" The sedate gent looked up at the girl. He had never seen her before but he rose and said pleasantly, "Sit down, Mary, my girl. It isn''t often I see you on washday. No wonder you''re tired. Being pregnant isn''t easy. By the way, don''t deliver the wash until Thursday. My wife is going to the District Attorney''s office to see if she can get your husband out of jail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it turned itself in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys were walking along a road in Georgia when they were struck by a police car driven by a drunken cop. One guy was thrown through the windshield and his buddy was knocked down an embankment. The first guy was charged with breaking and entering; and the second with leaving the scene of an accident.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Revised Miranda Rights Version 3 You are under arrest and.... 1. No, I don''t care who you are. 2. No, I don''t care who you know. 3. Yes, you DO pay my salary. 4. Yes, you CAN have my job. 5. No, I don''t have anything better to do. 6. Yes, I DO arrest real criminals sometimes. 7. No, I am not picking on you because you are __________ (fill in any ethnic group/race). 8. No, I cannot give you a break. 9. No, I don''t know your friend, Officer __________. 10. Yes, you will be allowed to make a phone call. 11. Yes, I''m sure you will never do it again. 12. No, we can''t talk about it. 13. Yes, it DOES make me happy. 14. Yes, you WILL see me in court. Thank you, have a nice day. Your Arresting Officer __________', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five policemen were on a boat. The boat sank. How many policemen died? 10 - five during the accident, and five during the re-enactment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to throw a man down the stairs? None. He fell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, but he is never around when you need him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman took her next-door neighbor with her when she went to the police station to report her husband was missing. "Could you give me a description of your husband ma''am?" the officer asked. "He''s 35 years old, 6 foot 2, weighs approximately 190 pounds, has a very athletic build, gorgeous blue eyes, dark hair, is very soft spoken and wonderful with the children," the woman replied. "Wait a minute!" the neighbor protested. "Your husband is 5 foot 4, bald, fat, has brown eyes, a very big mouth and is mean to your children." "Yes, but who wants HIM back?" the woman said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was in the process of taking a verbal exam to join the local police force. "If you''re driving a police car, alone on a country road at night, and are being chased by a group of criminals driving sixty miles an hour, what would you do?" he was asked. Without hesitation, the young man replied, "Seventy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father in a hurry, taking his 8-year-old son to school, made a turn at a red light, where it wasn''t allowed. "Uh-oh, I just made an illegal turn!" he said. "That''s OK, Dad," his son replied. "The police car right behind us did the same thing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A veteran officer with 18 years is running radar on a main street of a rural town. Along comes a young driver in a brand new sports car going 48 mph in a 30 mph zone. The officer stops the young man and explains the violation. The driver becomes belligerent telling the officer his badge did not mean a thing. The young driver tells the officer to go ahead and write the ticket because his father knows people that will make the ticket "go away". While the officer completes the ticket the young driver continues his barrage of insults. Without flinching the officer completes the ticket and hands the young driver his copies. The driver looks at his copies and becomes very agitated. The driver said, "What the #$@%& do you think you are doing? I thought you said I was doing 48 in a 30. You wrote 88 in a 30?" The officer said, "Forty-eight, eighty-eight, what''s the difference? Your dad is going to make it go away anyway."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Swiss mountain guides who always do the same trails can get tired answering the same questions over and over. One time an English tourist was giving his guide an especially hard time with silly questions. They were walking through a mountain valley that was strewn with rocks, and the traveler asked, "How did these rocks get here?" "Sir," said the guide, "they were brought down by a glacier." The tourist peered up the mountain and said, "But I don''t see any glacier." "Oh, really?" said the guide. "I guess it has gone back for more rocks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thor: The Scandinavian god of acheth and painth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She does not HATE TELEVISED SPORTS - she is ATHLETICALLY IGNORANT. She has not BEEN AROUND - she is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION. She does not WEAR TOO MUCH PERFUME - she commits FRAGRANCE ABUSE. She does not GO SHOPPING - she is MALL FLUENT. She is not an AIR HEAD - she is REALITY IMPAIRED. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - she gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED. She does not get FAT or CHUBBY - she achieves MAXIMUM DENSITY. She is not COLD or FRIGID - she is THERMALLY INACCESSIBLE. She does not WEAR TOO MUCH MAKEUP - she has reached COSMETIC SATURATION. She does not NAG YOU - she becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She is not a BLEACHED BLONDE - she is PEROXIDE DEPENDENT. She is not a BAD COOK - she is MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE. She does not wear TOO MUCH JEWELRY - she is METALLICALLY OVERBURDENED. She is not CONCEITED - she is INTIMATELY AWARE OF HER BEST QUALITIES. She does not want to be MARRIED - she wants to lock you in DOMESTIC INCARCERATION. She does not GAIN WEIGHT - she is a METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER. She does not TEASE or FLIRT - she engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION. She is not DUMB - she is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY. She is not TOO SKINNY - she is SKELETALLY PROMINENT. She does not HAVE A MUSTACHE - she is IN TOUCH WITH HER MASCULINE SIDE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the mating call of a blonde? A: "I''m drunk!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple was having a discussion about family finances. Finally the husband exploded, "If it weren''t for my money, the house wouldn''t be here!" The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren''t for your money I wouldn''t be here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are lots of ways to ruin a date. Here are a few things NOT to say on a date... I really don''t like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired. I refuse to get cable. That''s how they keep tabs on you. I used to come here all the time with my ex. Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn''t hear my voice on the answering machine every hour. I really feel that I''ve grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn''t have given someone like you a second look. It''s been tough, but I''ve come to accept that most people I date just won''t be as smart as I am.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After being away on business for a week before Christmas, Tom thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift. "How about some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a bottle costing $50. "That''s a bit much," said Tom, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30. "That''s still quite a bit," Tom groused. Growing disgusted, the clerk brought out a tiny $15 bottle. Tom grew agitated, "What I mean," he said, "is I''d like to see something really cheap." So the clerk handed him a mirror.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was Christmas, and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner, "What are you charged with?" "Doing my Christmas shopping early," replied the defendant. "Surely that''s no offense," said the judge. "How early were you doing this shopping?" "Before the store opened."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I''ll bet you don''t know what day this is." "Of course I do," he answered as if he was offended, and left for the office. At 10:00 a.m., the doorbell rang and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a box of a dozen long stemmed red roses. At 1:00 p.m., a foil-wrapped, two-pound box of her favorite chocolates was delivered. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn''t wait for her husband to come home. "First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed. "I''ve never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The American tourist in Dublin had been complaining a great deal about the food. "Here," he said to the waitress, holding out a piece of meat for inspection, "do you call that pig?" "Which end of the fork, sir?" the waitress asked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy and his wife, a middle-aged couple, went for a stroll in the park. They were sitting down on a bench to rest when they heard voices coming from a secluded spot. Suddenly Mrs. Murphy realized that a young man was about to propose. Not wanting to eavesdrop at such an intimate moment, she nudged her husband and whispered, "Whistle and let that young couple know that someone can hear them." Murphy said, "Whistle? Why should I whistle? Nobody whistled to warn me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy said to his daughter, "I want you home by eleven o''clock." She said, "But Father, I''m no longer a child!" He said, "I know, that''s why I want you home by eleven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does NASCAR stand for? Non Athletic Sport Created Around Rednecks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards." The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards. What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?" "No," the cook said. "Three flat tires mean three pancakes, a pair of headlights is two eggs sunny side up, and running boards are 2 slices of crisp bacon." "Oh, OK!" said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer. The trucker asked, "What are the beans for, Blondie?" She replied, "I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the woman who had sex with a donkey? Apparently she liked an ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boyfriend was working in the souvenir shop at the Canterbury Cathedral in Kent, England. One afternoon he was talking with an attendant who worked in the cathedral when they were approached by two tourists. "Are you a monk?" one of the women asked. "No," the attendant explained, "I wear this robe as part of my job, but I''m not a member of any religious order." "Then where are the monks?" asked the woman. The man replied, "Oh, there haven''t been any monks here since 1415." Hearing this, the woman looked at her watch and announced to her friend, "Betty, we missed the monks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Touring Ireland''s countryside with a group of travel writers, we passed an immaculate cemetery with hundreds of beautiful headstones set in a field of emerald-green grass. Everyone reached for their cameras when the tour guide said the inventor of the crossword puzzle was buried there. He pointed out the location, "Three down and four across."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there were two farmers; one had a daughter and the other had a son. When their kids were teenagers they started dating, and the two farmers encouraged it. One day the girl''s father went over to the other farmer''s house and said that he didn''t want their children dating any more. The boy''s father asked, "Why not?" The other farmer said, "Come here and I''ll show you." In his yard was the girl''s name written in pee in the snow. The boy''s father said, "Oh, come on, that''s just boy stuff." The other farmer said, "You think I don''t know my own daughter''s handwriting?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One radio station prank took place on April Fool''s Day. They announced that the phone company would be cleaning the dirt out of the phone lines that afternoon. They do it, as it seems, by blowing air into the wires in the switching station. The problem is that the dirt comes out of the earpiece and mouthpiece of the telephone and could dirty the rugs or furniture in your house. Consequently, the phone company asks that the good citizens please get plastic bags and put them over the handsets of the telephones to protect their belongings. Stores reported a run on plastic bags, and the phone company made the radio station retract the original claim.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 12999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in the days of the Mattel Cabbage Patch Kid craze it was usually very hard to get one for the kiddies. A radio station (I don''t know where) announced that Mattel was going to get Cabbage Patch Kids out to the people of this particular city. The plan was that they had to go to the football field of the local university and wait. An airplane would fly overhead and the dolls would be dropped onto the field. People were supposed to hold their credit cards up so that a photographer with a telephoto lens in the airplane could get the credit card numbers and charge the price of the dolls to the recipients'' accounts. People actually showed up, waving American Express cards in the breeze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s the day before Thanksgiving, and the butcher is just locking up when a man begins pounding on the front door. "Please let me in," says the man desperately. "I forgot to buy a turkey, and my wife will kill me if I don''t come home with one." "Okay," says the butcher, "let me see what I have left." He goes into the freezer and discovers that there''s only one scrawny turkey left. He brings it out to show the man. "That one is too skinny. What else have you got?" says the man. The butcher takes the bird back into the freezer and waits a few minutes and brings the same turkey back out to the man. "Oh, no," says the man, "That one doesn''t look any better. You''d better give me both of them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she''s not feeling well. "What''s the matter?" he asks. "I have a case of anal glaucoma," she says in a weak voice. "What in the hell is anal glaucoma?" he inquires. "Well, I just can''t see my ass coming to work today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A motorist was on trial for hitting a pedestrian. His lawyer argued, "Your Honor, my client has been driving for over twenty-five years." "Your Honor," the plaintiff''s lawyer retored, "if this case is going to be judged by experience, may I remind you that my client has been walking for over fifty years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American businessman goes to Japan on a business trip, but he hates Japanese food, so he asks the concierge at his hotel if there''s any place around where he can get American food. The concierge tells him he''s in luck, there''s a pizza place that just opened, and they deliver. The concierge gives the businessman the phone number, he goes back to his room and orders a pizza. Thirty minutes later, the delivery guy shows up at the door with the pizza. The businessman takes the pizza, and starts sneezing uncontrollably. He asks the delivery man, "What the heck did you put on this pizza?" The delivery man bows deeply and says, "We put on pizza what you order: pepper only."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While I was visiting my sister one evening, I took out a candy dispenser that was shaped like a miniature person. "How does that thing work?" she asked. As I turned the figurine''s arm to pop candy out, my sister laughed. "I see ... it''s a lot like my husband," she said. "You have to twist his arm to get anything out of him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher was sitting at her desk grading papers when her first-grade class came back from lunch. Alice informed the teacher, "Paul has to go to the principal''s office." "I wonder why," the teacher mused. "Because he''s a following person," Alice replied. "A what?" the teacher asked. "It came over the loudspeaker: ''The following persons are to go to the office.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many dicks can a redneck girl take at a time? It depends on how many brothers she has.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so poor she eats cereal with a fork to save milk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Special Cheesecake One of my co-workers decided it was time to shed some excess weight. She took her new diet so seriously that she even changed her driving route to avoid her favorite bakery. One morning, however, she arrived at work carrying a gigantic cheesecake. We all scolded her, but her smile remained cherubic. "This is a very special cheesecake," she explained. "I accidentally drove by the bakery this morning and there in the window was a host of goodies. I felt this was no accident, so I prayed, ''Lord, if you want me to have one of those delicious cheesecakes, let me have a parking spot directly in front of the bakery'', and sure enough," she continued, "the ninth time around the block, there it was!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy put on his baseball uniform and went outside to play, chanting "I''m the best baseball hitter in the world!" He throws the ball in the air, swings and misses. Strike one! He adjusts his hat and says, "I''m the best baseball hitter in the world!" He throws the ball in the air, swings and misses. Strike two! He adjusts his hat a little more, takes a couple of practice swings and says, "I''m the best baseball hitter in the world!" Once more, he throws the ball in the air, swings and misses again. Strike three! He thinks for a few moments about what just took place, then says, "I''m the best pitcher in the world!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While visiting a relative in Chicago, a University of Alabama student went to a party where he met a very attractive co-ed. Attempting to strike up a conversation with her, he asked, "Where does you go to school?" The co-ed, not at all impressed with his grammar or southern drawl, thought she would at least be polite and answer. "Yale," she said. Taking a deep breath, the UA student shouted, "I says, where does you go to school?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do the Arkansas cheerleaders wear bibs? To keep the tobacco juice off their uniforms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bubba finally agreed to take his wife, Sue Ellen, to a play. They had hardly sat down when he jumped up and said "Sue Ellen, we gotta go!" With Sue Ellen in tow, Bubba stomped out to the foyer, demanded his money back, and they left the theater. When they got out onto the sidewalk, Sue Ellen said, "Now you tell me what''s wrong, Bubba Leroy, and you tell me right now, or I ain''t goin'' another step." Bubba said, "Sue Ellen, I ain''t no fool and I''m an only child. We done paid $20 of egg money for this here play and I heard somebody say that the second act was 10 years later! We ain''t got that kinda money to be wastin'' on play actin'' when we ain''t even sure where we gonna be in 10 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The children in the Sunday school class were asked by their teacher to draw pictures of their favorite Bible stories. When she looked at little Ricky''s picture, she was puzzled to see that he had drawn four people in an airplane, so she asked him which story it represented. Little Ricky replied, "That''s the Flight to Egypt." "Oh, I see," said the teacher. "That must be Mary, Joseph and the Baby Jesus, but who''s the fourth person?" "That''s Pontius ... the Pilot!" answered Ricky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning, a man attended the service at the local church. He was so moved by the preacher''s sermon that he stopped to shake his hand. "Reverend, that was the best damn sermon I have ever heard," the man said. "Thank you, sir," the Reverend replied, "but I must ask that you not use profanity in the Lord''s house." "Sorry, Reverend, I just can''t help myself," said the man, "that was just such a damn good sermon." "Sir, please," replied the Reverend. "Again I ask you not to use profanity in church." "Okay, Reverend," the man said. "I just want you to know that I thought it was so damn good that I put $5000 in the collection plate." "No shit!" exclaimed the Reverend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attending her first confession, the new nun tells the priest that she has a terrible secret. "Sister Dominique," the priest says, your secret is safe in the sanctity of the confessional." "Father," she says, "I never wear underwear under my habit." With a little chuckle, the priest says, "That is not too serious, Sister Dominique. For penance, say three Hail Marys, three Our Fathers and do five cartwheels on your way to the altar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. He gave the organist a copy of the service and asked her if she could come up with some kind of inspirational music to play, after he made the announcement about the finances, to help put the congregation in a giving mood. "Don''t worry, I''ll come up with something," she said. During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and sisters, we find ourselves in great difficulty. The cost of the roof repairs is twice as much as we expected, and we need $4000 more. Any of you who are able to pledge $100 or more, please stand up." At that moment, the organist began playing, "The Star Spangled Banner."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During his sermon, the preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike. As he preached, he continued to move briskly about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. At one point, he moved to one side and got caught up in the cord, nearly tripping before he jerked it again. After several circles and jerks, a little girl in the second pew leaned toward her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if he gets loose, will he hurt us?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the first day of creation, God created the dog. On the second day, God created man to serve the dog. On the third day, God created all the animals of the earth, especially the horse, to serve as potential food for the dog. On the fourth day, God created honest toil so that man could labor for the good of the dog. On the fifth day, God created the tennis ball so that the dog might or might not retrieve it. On the sixth day, God created veterinary science to keep the dog healthy and the man broke. On the seventh day, God tried to rest, but He had to walk the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It seems that God received a delegation of animals complaining of their lot in life. There was an elephant, a giraffe, and a hen. The elephant complained, "Lord, I HATE THIS TRUNK YOU have given me. It gets in the way, and makes me look like a total fool!" The Lord said, "Don''t complain. It lets you pick up food, drink, and water without getting wet!" Next the giraffe complained, "Lord, I HATE THIS LONG NECK! It makes me top heavy, I get terrible neck pains, and people point and laugh at me!" The Lord said, "Don''t complain. It lets you pick the best fruit and leaves from the high branches, and allows you to see a fair distance." Then the hen spoke up. "Lord, I don''t want to complain, but either let me have a bigger ass or smaller eggs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three nuns die and go to heaven where they are met by St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Pete says, "Ladies, you all led such wonderful lives, that I''m granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want." The first nun says, "I want to be Bo Derek," and - POOF - she''s gone. The second says, "I want to be Madonna," and - POOF - she''s gone. The third says, "I want to be Virginia Pepalini." St Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he says. "Virginia Pepalini," replies the nun. St. Peter shakes his head and says, "I''m sorry, that name just doesn''t ring a bell." The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter. He reads the paper and starts laughing. He hands it back to her and says, "No, Sister, this says the Virginia Pipeline was laid by 500 men in 7 days!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On our last venture out for Christmas shopping, we had bought a few gadgets for the younguns and then realized we didn''t have any batteries. I stepped over to the counter to get the batteries, but I couldn''t attract any clerk''s attention. I waited a while then said to April, "I''ll get someone''s attention. Stay right here." With that, I pulled out a tape measure I just happened to have with me, and started to "measure" one of those large screen plasma television sets. You know, the ones that go for about $4000. Amazingly, a clerk almost leap-frogged over several pieces of furniture to reach my side. "Sir! Can I help you?" he exclaimed. "Yeah, you can. I''ll take 8 of those batteries over there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A congregation honors a rabbi for twenty-five years of service by sending him to Oahu for a week, all expenses paid. When he enters his hotel room, there''s a nude girl lying on the bed. He picks up the phone, calls his temple, and says, "Where is your respect? As your rabbi, I am extremely angry with you." Hearing this, the girl immediately gets up and starts to get dressed. He says, "Where are you going? I''m not angry with you..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engaged couple met with their pastor to set the date for their wedding. During the meeting, the pastor asked them whether they preferred to have a contemporary or a traditional service. They chose a contemporary service. On the day of the big event there was a major storm, which caused the groom to take a different route to the church. Since the streets were flooded, he rolled up his trouser legs to keep his trousers dry. When he finally reached the church, his best man rushed him into the sanctuary and up to the altar, just as the ceremony was starting. "Pull down your pants," whispered the pastor. "Uh, Reverend, I''ve changed my mind," the groom replied. "I think I would prefer the traditional service."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny had the flu and wasn''t able to attend the Palm Sunday church service with his family. When they returned home from the service, they were carrying palm branches. "What are those?" Little Johnny asked his mother. "People held them over Jesus'' head as he walked by," his mother explained. "Well, doesn''t that just figure," grumbled Little Johnny. "The one Sunday I can''t go to church, and Jesus shows up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The preschoolers'' Sunday school teacher told them that she wanted each of them to learn one fact about Jesus by the following Sunday. The next Sunday, she asked each of them what they had learned. "I learned that he was born in a manger," said Julie. Timmy said, "I learned that he threw the money changers out of the temple." "What about you, Johnny? What did you learn?" the teacher asked. "He has a pick-up truck and he doesn''t know how to drive," replied Little Johnny. Curious, the teacher asked, "And where did you learn that, Johnny?" "I learned it from Daddy," Little Johnny explained. "When we were driving down the highway, a pick-up truck cut right in front of us and Daddy shouted, "Jesus Christ! Why don''t you learn how to drive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a mother was walking past her young daughter''s room when she saw the little girl kneeling by her bed, head bowed, hands folded, reciting the alphabet. "What are you doing, sweetheart?" the mother asked. "I''m saying my prayers, Mommy," replied the little girl, "but I couldn''t think of what I wanted to say, so I''m saying the letters of the alphabet, and God can put them together whichever way He feels is best."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t politicians ever consider being gynocologists? They would have to deal with too much Bush every day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do elfs learn while in school? A. The elfabet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, God was talking to St. Peter. God said, "I am not very happy with all the sinners in the world. I should send a letter to each of them and tell them what they are doing wrong and they must stop, or they will not come to Heaven when they die." "I have a better idea," St. Peter said. "We should send letters to all the people who are doing good things and congratulate them on being accepted into Heaven when they pass on." God agreed, so they sent out the letters. Do you know what the letters said? What, you mean you didn''t get one?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock.. Who''s there? Panther.... Panther who? Panth-er no panth I''m goin'' thwimmin''!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marg and Sam invited a couple over for a evening of bridge. "Sam," Marg said, "this is the last couple that will ever accept an invitation to come to our house. If you dare to do anything to offend them tonight, I will crucify you!" After they played for a while, Marg went into the kitchen to get some refreshments. When she returned, she saw that Sam was sitting at the table by himself. She put the tray down and said, "What did you do to run them off this time?" "I didn''t do anything," Sam replied. "We were just sitting here and a mouse ran across the floor. Sue looked at me and said that we can get rid of mice by shoving steel wool into their little holes. All I asked was, ''How do you hold their little feet?'' They both got up and left."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old guy was wandering around a supermarket calling out - "Crisco? Crisco? C-R-I-S-C-O!" Finally, a clerk approached him and said, "Sir, the Crisco in on aisle seven." "Oh," the old guy said, "I''m not looking for Crisco. I''m calling my wife." "Your wife''s name is Crisco?" the puzzled clerk asked. "Hell, no," the old guy said. "I only call her that when we come to the supermarket." "Oh? Well, what do you call her when you''re not in the supermarket?" asked the clerk. "Lard Ass!" replied the old guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ted and Alice were thrilled when their long wait to adopt a baby finally came to an end. The adoption center called and told them they had an adorable German baby boy and the couple took him without hesitation. On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped at the local college so they could enroll in night classes. After they completed filling out the form, the registrar inquired, "What possessed you to study German?" "We''ve just adopted a wonderful German baby boy and in a year or so, he''ll begin to talk. We want to make sure we''re able to understand him!" the couple proudly explained.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple were on a road trip and stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. They finished their lunch and it wasn''t until they were back on the highway that the old woman realized she had left her glasses behind at the restaurant. They had to continue on the highway for quite some distance before they were able to find a spot to turn around. The old man grumbled and complained all the way back to the restaurant. When they finally arrived, as the old woman got out of the car to retrieve her glasses, the old man said, "While you''re in there, you may as well get my hat, too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m feeling so ashamed of the way we live, a wife said to her husband, who preferred to spend his time laying on the couch watching TV, rather than finding a job. "My father pays our mortgage, my mother buys all of our groceries for us, my sister buys us our clothes, my uncle bought us a car. I''m feeling so ashamed." The husband raised his head and replied, "Well, you should feel ashamed. Those three worthless brothers of yours never even give us a cent!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man stumbles into his house after a night of drinking and is greeted by his very angry wife. "What''s the big idea of coming home half drunk?" she yells. "I''m sorry, honey, but I ran out of money," he mutters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seven-year-old Timmy had been the center of his parents'' lives up until the time his new baby sister came along. He found it very difficult to share their attention and was becoming more and more jealous. When his little sister was a year old, his parents took him aside and told him that since she was getting bigger, their house was too small, so they would be moving to a bigger house. "Why bother," Timmy grumbled, "She''s crawling good now, so she''ll probably just follow us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly man and his wife, vacationing at a cabin by the lake, were sitting on the porch and reminiscing about their younger years. "This is the lake where I learned how to swim when I was a small boy," the husband said. "My father threw me into the water and I had to learn how to dog paddle to get back to the shore or drown. It was sink or swim." "That was a cruel thing for your father to do," the wife said. "How could a loving father do such a thing to a small child? That must have been a very difficult way to learn how to swim." "Not really," replied the husband. "Learning how to swim was the easy part. Getting out of that burlap bag first was the hard part!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This really happened (honest!) A bunch of very young girls arrived at our door at Halloween. My Mum, being friendly, asked them whereabouts they lived, because she hadn''t seen them before. They replied, "We live quite near here, where do you live?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a child who came back from school one day with loads of cuts and bruises and his bike broken. The concerned mother asked him what had happened. So, the child says "Well, when the fridge landed on me..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This really happened (honest!) A man was receiving death threats from another man, so he took him to court. The judge threw the case out on the basis that "the threats obviously hadn''t been carried out." Really, how stupid can you get?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your email address ends in "@over.yonder.com". You have a bumper sticker on your truck that says "My other computer is a laptop". You''ve ever doubled the value of your truck by installing a cellular phone. Your spell checker knows words like, "Y''all", "Yonder" and "Reckon". You''ve ever used a CD-ROM as a coaster to set your beer on. Your laptop has a sticker on it that says "Protected by Smith & Wesson". You''ve used jumper cables to wire your network. Your wife said "either she or the computer had to go" and you still don''t miss her. You start all your emails with "Hey Bubba", or "Howdy Y''all".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The politician was sitting at his campaign headquarters when the phone rang. He answered it and listened intently. After a brief moment, his face lit up with a smile. He hung up the phone and immediately called his mother to pass along the good news. "Ma, the results are in," he shouted joyously. "I won the election!" "Honestly?" his mother replied. "Aw, gee, Ma, what a time to bring that up!" he said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While running for the Senate in New York, the young man''s political advisor heard some very upsetting news. "Listen," he said, "you must go to Albany right away or you''re going to lose a lot of votes. They''re telling lies about you there." "I have to go to Buffalo first or I''ll lose even more votes," replied the candidate. "Why? What''s happening in Buffalo?" the advisor asked. "They''re telling the truth about me!" replied the candidate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of American tourists were on a guided tour through an ancient castle in Europe. "Ladies and gentlemen," the guide said, "this castle is over 700 years old. Nothing has been altered or touched in all those years." "Sounds like they have the same cheap landlord I have!" exclaimed one of the tourists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly lady was stopped to pull into a parking space when a young man in his new Mercedes went around her and parked in the space she was waiting for. She was so upset that she went up to the man and said, "I was going to park there!" The man, being a real smart alec, said, "Oh, well, that''s what you can do when you''re young and bright." This made the lady even angrier, so she got in her car, backed up, pressed on the gas and plowed right into his Mercedes. The young man raced back to his car and exclaimed, "What did you go and do that for?" The little old lady replied, "That''s what you can do when you''re old and rich!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A film crew was on location deep in the desert. One day, an old Indian went up to the director and said, "Tomorrow storm." The next day there was a sandstorm. Several days later, the Indian went up to the director and said, "Tomorrow rain." The next day it rained for the entire day. "This Indian is amazing," said the director. He told his secretary to hire the Indian to predict the weather. However, after several successful predictions, the old Indian failed to show up for a couple of weeks. Finally, the director sent for him. "I have a big scene to shoot tomorrow," the director said, "and I''m counting on you. What will the weather be like?" "Not know," replied the Indian, shrugging his shoulders. "Radio broken!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Susie was mother''s little helper and always set the table when company was coming for dinner. The table was set, the visitors had arrived and everyone sat down at the table when Mother noticed that something was missing. "Susie, you didn''t put a knife and fork out for Mr. Grover," mother said. "I didn''t think he would need them, Mommy," Susie explained. "Daddy says he eats like a horse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and baby camel are talking one day when the baby camel asks, "Momma, why do I have these huge three-toed feet?" The mother replies, "Well, son, when we trek across the desert, your toes will help you to stay on top of the soft sand." A few minutes later, the young camel asks, "Momma, why do I have these long eyelashes?" "They''re to keep the sand out of your eyes on the trips through the desert," replies the mother. "Momma, why do I have these great big humps on my back?" asks the baby camel. "They''re to help us store fat for our long treks across the desert, so we can go without eating for long periods," explains the mother. "So, we have huge feet to stop us from sinking, long eyelashes to keep the sand out of our eyes and these humps to store fat," the young camel says. "That''s right, son," says the mother. "Then why are we in San Diego Zoo?" asks the baby camel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man accused of theft was appearing before the Judge. "Your Honor," his lawyer said, "I feel it is very unfair for my client to be accused of theft. He arrived in this city only a few days ago and barely knows his way around. What''s more, he is only able to speak a few words of English." The judge looked sternly at the defendant and asked, "How much English do you speak?" The defendant looked up and replied, "Give me your wallet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A murderer was secured to the electric chair, about to be executed. The chaplain approached him and asked, "Do you have any last requests?" "Yes," replied the murderer. "Would you hold my hand?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blond walking down the street, and she saw an empty coke can on the floor. So she picked it up and handed it to lost property.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she ate 100 cakes yesterday and got thinner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was walking down the road when she saw a beautiful looking lamp, so she picked it up. She rubbed it and a magic genie came out. "You may have any three objects in the world, oh mighty mistress," said the genie. The blonde replied, "I wish I had an endless glass of wine." Suddenly a big, crystal glass filled with wine appeared in the blonde''s hand. She drank it and to her surprise, it filled up again! "Wow! This wine is really nice, and it can''t run out!" the blonde said. "In fact, it''s so good, I''ll have another two of these, please, genie!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sailing down the river amazon in a canoe, when he was hit by a poison dart. He woke up some time later in a cage, surrounded by a tribe chief and his minions. The chief said "You have been tresspassing on our tribes private property. You will be doomed to death by ravens pecking out your insides. However, if you pass our 2 tests, you will be allowed to go. The first of which is a test of courage, of bravery, of strength. You must go into the first tent, and there you will find a lion, a lion with a thorn in its paw. The second challenge is one of compassion, thought and love. You must shag the 10 most beautiful ladies of our tribe. Now, let the challenges begin..." The man goes into the tent and at first, there is much roaring and howling, but eventually it calms down. Then the man comes out and says "That''s the first challenge done! Now where are those 10 beautiful ladies who I must pull thorns out of their paws?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day two old men, Bill and Ted, were sitting on a park bench discussing their sex life. Bill states, "At my age, me and the old lady have sex about once a year." Ted replies, "Oh really! Me and the old lady have sex almost every day." "No way!" says Bill. "You''re joking, right?" "No, really!" insists Ted. "Almost on Sunday, almost on Monday, almost on Tuesday..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chapstick is selling a new product in England. It is the regular Chapstick with Viagra added to the formula. Englishmen like it because it helps them keep a stiff upper lip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pirate Blackbeard''s ship license had expired so he went into the shipping license office and got a new one, but on the new one he needed an updated photo of himself. So, Pirate Blackbeard went into the photographer''s room and asked to have his photo taken. The photographer obliged and said, "Ok, please pose front on" and took a photo. He need to take another photo so he asked Blackbeard to "Please Poseidon!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a quiet smoke. Jack returned with lung cancer and Jill a fatal stroke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bunch of lawyers were sitting around the office playing poker. "I win!" said Johnson. Henderson threw down his cards. "That''s it! I''ve had it! Johnson is cheating!!!" "How can you tell?" Phillips asked. "Those aren''t the cards I dealt him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy entered a barber shop, sat on the barber''s chair and said, "I''ll have a shave and a shoe shine, please." The barber began to lather his face while a woman with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts he had ever seen knelt down and began to shine his shoes. "Young lady," the cowboy said, "you and I should go and spend some time in a hotel room." "I''m married and my husband wouldn''t like that at all," she replied. "No problem," the cowboy said, "just tell him you''re working overtime and I''ll pay you the difference." "You tell him," she said. "He''s the one shaving you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If four people are standing under an umbrella and the umbrella has a hole in it, how many people are getting wet? None. It wasn''t raining!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you have a fat friend, there are no seesaws, just catapults.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a very hot day in Minnesota. Inga finished hanging up the wash, put dinner in the oven and headed downtown to do some errands. "Gootness, it''s hot," she mused to herself, as she walked down Main Street. As she passed by a tavern, she thought, "Vy nodt?" So she walked in and took a seat at the bar. The bartender came up and asked her what she would like to drink. "Ya know," Inga said, "it is so hodt. I tink I''ll have myself ze coldt beer." "Anheuser Busch?" asked the bartender. Blushing, Inga replied, "Vell, tanks, und how''s yer pecker?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A proud father brought home a swing set he had just purchased for his children and immediately began to assemble it while all the neighborhood children anxiously waited to play on it. After several hours of reading the assembly instructions and trying to fit bolt A into slot B, etc., he gave up and called upon an old handyman working in a neighboring yard. The old-timer came over, tossed the directions away, and had the set completely assembled in a short period of time. "It''s beyond me," the father said, "how you managed to get it all put together without even reading the directions." "To tell the truth," replied the old-timer, "I can''t read, and when you can''t read, you''ve got to think."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a dinner party, the hosts'' two small children entered the dining room naked and proceeded to parade slowly around the table. Embarrassed, the parents pretended nothing was happening and continued to converse with their guests. The guests co-operated and also carried on as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening. After they finished walking all around the room, the children left. As the children disappeared from sight, there was a moment of silence at the table, during which one child was heard to say, "See, I told you, it IS vanishing cream!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Christmas, a parent decided that she was no longer going to remind her children of their thank-you note duties. As a result, their grandmother did not receive acknowledgments of the generous checks she had given. However, things were different the following year. "The children came over in person to thank me," the grandparent told a friend triumphantly. "How wonderful!" the friend exclaimed. "What do you think caused the change in their behavior?" "Oh, that''s easy," the grandmother replied. "This year I didn''t sign the checks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now, as we don''t have enough parachutes for all of us... "Of course that''s not a mountain in front...isn''t it?" "That''s not meant to happen!" "What dy''a mean were not meant to be going to Iraq?" Things you don''t want to see on an aeroplane: Fire engines and ambulances surounding the runway when you come in to land. Armed soldiers and tanks surrounding the runway when you come in to land. The wing fall off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you don''t want to hear on an aeroplane: "You can''t leave us now Captain, not at this stage!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nick''s Grandma gave him a map to her house. The address was 1767 Old Miffs Road. Nick traveled till he got to Old Miffs road. He didn''t pay attention to the sign and thought he was lost. He stopped at a woman''s house and she opened the door. "Why hello there!" the woman said. "Nice to see you, Nick." Nick couldn''t hear her, so he asked "Do you know where 1767 Old Miffs Road is?" "You''re here," she said, but Nick still couldn''t hear her. He went to a different house down the road. He asked "Do you know where 1767 Old Miffs Road is?" "Yes, it''s right there." "This isn''t Old Miffs Road!" "Pay attention to street signs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a blonde who was writing a book. She didn''t know what else to write, so she took a block from her little sisters toy box and went to go and watch TV. Her mom comes in and sees the book on the table with the wooden block on it. She goes ask her daughter what it was and her blonde daughter responded, "It''s writers block mommy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sitting in a plane when another man sat down in the seat beside him. The new fellow was a wreck, pale, hands shaking, biting his nails and moaning in fear. "Hey, pal, what''s the matter?" the first fellow asked. "I''ve been transferred to Los Angeles, California," he answered nervously. "They have riots, drugs, the highest crime rate in the country ... " "Wait a minute," the first fellow said. "I''ve lived in L.A. all my life and I can assure you it''s nowhere near as bad as the media reports. Find yourself a nice home, go to work, mind your own business, enroll your kids in a good school and it''s as safe as anywhere in the world." The second fellow stopped shaking for a moment and replied, "Thank God. I was worried to death! If you live there and say it''s all right, I''ll take your word for it. By the way, what do you do for a living?" "Me?" replied the first fellow. "I''m tail gunner on a bread truck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The once was a lung doctor waiting outside a patient''s room of who she didn''t know. A different doctor came up to her with a shot canister and said ''I need you to go in the and draw blood from this guy'' ''Ok, simple!'' she responded. She walks in the room and there strapped down to the table was a big muscley guy who was in there for taking drugs.'' He sits there struggling to get out. The wrist bands look as if they''re about to break. The lung doctor storms out of there and spots the doctor. She says ''Ok if you want to get a needle stuck and play hostage today that''s fine. But there''s no way in hell I''m going in there and sticking that hulk with a needle'' She hands him the shot canister and walks away. Under his breath he says ''Crap now who should i ask..?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Carole was planning her upcoming wedding and asked to wear her mother''s wedding gown. When she tried it on, it was a perfect fit on her petite frame. Suddenly, her mother''s eyes filled with tears. Putting an arm around her, Carole lovingly said, "Don''t cry, Mom. Remember, you aren''t losing a daughter, you''re gaining a son." "Oh, it''s not that," her mother sobbed. "I used to fit into that gown!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the difference between a dog and a fox? A: About five drinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it dangerous to go in the jungle after 5 p.m? Because elephants jump out of trees after 5 p.m. Why do beavers have flat tails? Because they go in the jungle after 5 p.m!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone on a passenger ship could see a bearded man on a small island, shouting and desperately waving his hands. "Who is that man?" a passenger asked the ship''s captain. "Why is he so upset?" "I have no idea," the Captain replied, "but, every year when we pass by here, he goes crazy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Indian is standing on the corner, when an attractive young woman passes by. The Indian raises his hand in greeting, and says, "Chance!" The same thing happens several days in a row. The woman walks past and the old Indian raises his hand and says, "Chance!" Finally, she can''t ignore it any longer, so she stops and asks, "You''re an Indian, aren''t you?" The Indian nods. She says, "I always thought Indians said ''How!'' as a greeting." The Indian replies, "Already know ''how''. Just want ''chance''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money. "How much do they run?" he asked the clerk. "That depends," said the salesman. "They run from $2.00 to $2,000." "Let''s see the $2.00 model," he said. The clerk put the device around the man''s neck. "You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket," he instructed. "How does it work?" the customer asked. "For $2.00 it doesn''t work," the salesman replied. "But when people see it on you, they''ll talk louder!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is the reason they make oriental flavored noodles for Americans to get back at them for eating our dogs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Supermarket A new supermarket opened near my house. It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain. When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and experience the scent of fresh hay. When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn. Though I do have to say... I don''t buy my toilet paper there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Blonde walked into a bar. The Brunette used the door. The redhead actually OPENED the door, and the Asian actually WENT THROUGH the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: SSCCRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHH...thump. We shall never know...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so dirty that she was banned from a sewage facility because of sanitation worries!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where does a blackbird go for a drink? A: To a crow bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The gas station was located on a main highway leading to the beach so the pump attendant was accustomed to seeing tired and sunburned occupants in the cars that pulled in to fill up. When a rusty old station wagon containing a very tired looking couple and seven screaming children pulled into his station, the attendant tried small talk to cheer the occupants. "Hope you had a good day at the beach! Nice looking kids there. Are they all yours or is this a picnic?" Wearily, the driver relied, "Yes, they are all mine, and it is NO picnic!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A detachment of paratroopers was practicing in a rural area. One jumper landed on the property of an old mountain man and his very large family. One of the kids saw the chute floating down and yelled out to his father, "Pa, bring your shotgun. The stork is bringing ''em full grown now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The little old lady seated herself right behind the bus driver. Every ten minutes or so she''d pipe up, "Have we reached Oriskany Falls yet, sonny?" "No, lady, not yet; I''ll let you know," he replied, time after time. The hours passed, the old woman kept asking for Oriskany Falls, and finally the little town came into view. Sighing with relief, the driver slammed on the brakes, pulled over and called out, "This is where you get out, lady." "Is this Oriskany Falls?" "YES!" he bellowed. "Get out!" "Oh, I''m going all the way to Albany, sonny," she explained sweetly. "It''s just that my daughter told me that when we got to Oriskany Falls, it''ll be time take my blood pressure pill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The driver of a huge trailer lost control of his rig, plowed into an empty tollbooth and smashed it to pieces. He climbed down from the wreckage and within a matter of minutes, a truck pulled up and discharged a crew of workers. The men picked up each broken piece of the former tollbooth and spread some kind of creamy substance on it. Then they began fitting the pieces together. In less than a half hour, they had the entire tollbooth reconstructed and looking good as new. "Astonishing!" the truck driver said to the crew chief. "What was the white stuff you used to get all the pieces together?" The crew chief said, "Oh, that was tollgate booth paste."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With what kind of bread do elves make their sandwiches? Shortbread!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two young cowboys - aged six and four - walked into the pretend bar for a drink. The older cowboy thumped his fist on the pretend bar and said to the pretend bartender, "Bartender, gimme a rye whiskey!" The younger cowboy was not to be outdone. "Yeah, and make mine a whole wheat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer and his friend were leaning on a fence chatting. Suddenly, the local Game Warden showed up and insisted on checking the farmer''s property and, in particular, a certain field. The farmer refused to allow him access to the field but the Warden insisted he had the right, saying, "I''m the Game Warden and I have a card! This card allows me to go in." Before the farmer could stop him, the Warden was off into the field. Soon, a horrifying scream pierced the air and the Warden, being chased by a massive bull, reappeared running for his life. "Help, help!" he cried. The farmer shouted back, "Show him your card! Show him your card!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge was instructing the jury that because a witness changed his statement after giving it to the police, he should not necessarily be regarded as untruthful. "For example," the judge said, "when I entered my chambers today, I was certain that I had my gold watch in my pocket, then I remembered that I had left it on my nightstand in my bedroom." When the judge arrived home that evening, his wife asked, "Why so much urgency for your watch? Don''t you think sending three men to pick it up for you was a bit extreme?" "What?" exclaimed the judge. "I didn''t send anyone for my watch, let alone three people. What did you do?" "I gave it to the first one," replied his wife, "after all, he knew exactly where it was."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was suing a man for defamation of character, charging that he had called her a pig. The man was found guilty and fined. After the trial, he asked the Judge, "Does this mean that I can''t call Miss Stuart a pig?" The Judge said that was accurate. "Does this also mean that I can''t call a pig ''Miss Stuart''?" the man asked. The Judge told the man that he could indeed call a pig ''Miss Stuart'' with no fear of legal action. The man then turned to Miss Stuart and said, "Good afternoon, Miss Stuart!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer was reading a wealthy man''s will to the people mentioned in it. "To my wife Claire, who stood by me through the rough times as well as the good, I leave you the house, the cars and $5 million." The lawyer continued, "To my daughter Sarah, who took care of me during my illness and kept my company going, I leave you the yacht, the business and $2 million." The lawyer concluded, "And, to my cousin Phil, who always hated me, argued with me, was envious of me, and thought I would never mention him in my will ... well, you''re wrong. ''Hi, Phil!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And God created woman and she had three breasts. God then asked the woman, "Is there anything you would like to have changed?" "Yes," the woman replied. "Could you get rid of this middle breast?" And so it was done. Holding the third breast in her hand, the woman exclaimed, "What can be done with this useless boob?" And God created man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('365.25 days on a low-calorie diet - 1 lite year', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is an actual chatroom conversation from a "local Chatroom" Joe: I wonder what would happen if you had a sleep number bed, and set it to 69? Christy: ? huh? Mike: I dont know, but it sure sounds tasty! Joe: You probably wouldn''t understand Christy, you''re too pure and innocent. Christy: Maybe... sounds more like a police code or something Mike: lol, ya, that''s it. "This is the dispatcher, what is your status" Joe: lol "We have a 69 in progress at the overpass, Officer needs assistance" Mike: "Move in! Move in! Officer has gone down, repeat, Officer has gone down! Joe: "Someone better call the fire department, looks like we''ll need the Jaws of Life for this one!" Christy: um.. why do i get the feeling i''ve started something horrible? o.O', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Clones are people two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This will make your computer A LOT faster, and it is REALLY EZPZ! The thing is, most ppl lack the knowlege to use it. 1.Go to the START menu 2. Click My Computer 3. Right click (C:) 4.Click Format 5. Click Yes 6. Repeat on (D:), then (E:), then (A:) 7. TA DA! FTR, if you do this, you will completely erase everything on your computer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A radical feminist gets on a bus when, just in front of her, a man gets up from his seat. "Here we go again," she thinks to herself. "Yet another man attempting to keep up the customs of a patriarchal society by offering a poor, defenseless woman his seat," and she pushes him back onto the seat. A minute passes and the man tries to get up again. She''s insulted again and refuses to allow him to get up. This happens several times over the next few minutes. Finally, the man pleads, "Lady, please, you have to let me get up. I''m already a couple of miles past my stop!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy''s teacher sent a note home to Mom saying, "Billy is a very bright boy, but spends much too much time thinking about girls and sex." The next day Mom sent a note back to the teacher saying, "If you happen to find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his Dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the second grader arrived home from school, she excitedly ran up to her mom and said, "Guess what we learned today, mommy? How to make babies." Her mother was more than surprised, but did her best to remain calm. She knew that this day would come, but she had hoped it wouldn''t have been so soon. "How interesting dear," her mother said. "How do you make babies?" "It''s really simple," replied the little girl. "All you have to do is change the ''y'' to ''i'' and add ''es''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asked little Andy if he knew his numbers yet. "Yes, teacher," he said, "my dad taught me." "Good, Andy. Tell me what comes after two," the teacher said. "Three," replied Andy. "Very good. What comes after five, Andy?" asked the teacher. "Six," answered Andy. "Excellent. Your dad did a very good job. Now, what comes after ten?" the teacher asked. "A jack!" replied Andy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Having just graduated from Harvard, the young man was very excited thinking about his future. Getting into a taxi, the driver says to him, "How are you on this beautiful, sunny day?" "I''m the class of 2006. I just graduated from Harvard and I''m very excited about getting out there and seeing what the world has in store for me!" The driver shakes the young man''s hand and replies, "Congratulations, young man. I''m George, class of 1968."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, during math class, the teacher asked Little Johnny, "If I give you two rabbits, two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many would you have?" "Seven," replied Johnny. "No, Johnny. Listen carefully this time. If I give you two rabbits, two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many would you have?" asked the teacher. "Seven!" insisted Johnny. "Let''s try this another way. If I give you two apples, two apples and another two apples, how many would you have?" the teacher asked. "Six," Johnny answered. "Good, Johnny, that''s right," said the teacher. "Now, if I give you two rabbits, two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many would you have?" "Seven!" Johnny said. "Johnny, how on earth do you work out that three lots of two rabbits would be seven?" asked the baffled teacher. "Easy. I already have one rabbit at home now!" Johnny replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The social studies teacher had just completed a lesson on war and peace. "How many of you," the teacher asked, "would say you''re opposed to war?" Not surprisingly, every student in the class raised their hand. "Who would like to give us their reason for being opposed to war?" asked the teacher. Little Johnny, sitting at the back of the class, immediately raised his hand. "Johnny, what is your reason?" the teacher asked. "I hate wars," explained Johnny, "because wars make history, and I hate History!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A well-endowed university student was always being teased by her sorority sisters for being a size 36DD. One night, at a fraternity party, a young man asked her what she would like to drink. "I''ll have a diet soda, please," she replied. "Oh, you must be the double D," he said. Furious, the girl wondered which one of her so-called friends had divulged such personal information. "And just what do you mean by that?" she snapped. Confused by her angry response, the man stammered, "You know, the designated driver."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher told her students they would start their day with the Pledge of Allegiance, instructing them to place their right hand over their heart and repeat after her. As she began to recite the Pledge, she looked around the room and noticed that Little Johnny hand his hand over the right cheek of his behind. "Little Johnny," she said, "we will not continue until you place your hand over your heart." "It is over my heart," Little Johnny replied innocently. She attempted to get Little Johnny to place his hand over his heart several times, all to no avail. Finally, frustrated, she asked, "What makes you think that''s your heart?" "Well, whenever Grandma comes to visit," Johnny explained, "she picks me up, gives me a couple of pats right here, and says, ''Bless your little heart,'' and I know Grandma wouldn''t lie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Little Johnny got his exam paper back, he saw a big red F staring back at him. Billy looked at his glum friend and asked, "Why did you get such a low mark on that test?" "Because of absence," Johnny answered. "You mean you were absent on the day of the test?" Billy inquired. Little Johnny replied, "I wasn''t, but the kid who sits next to me was."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher noticed that Johnny had been daydreaming for a long time, so she decided to get his attention. "Johnny," she said, "if the world is 25,000 miles around and eggs are sixty cents a dozen, how old am I?" Johnny answered, "Thirty-four." The teacher replied, "Well, that''s not far from my age. Tell me ... how did you guess?" "Oh, there''s nothing to it," Johnny said. "My big sister is seventeen and she''s only half-crazy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING- this is very racial. Please forgive me if it offends you, but its true when you think about it. Since we have so many Mexicans saying,"o we want to serve you americans, work in america...",why dont we just put them in the army. We give them our supplies. They go, jump the border like no manyana and set up base. With all the tanks the Iraqis have, they go and before you notice it they have the wheeles, the tank is up on cinder blocks and they are out of there, just like they do in the city. We have tanks, with guns that turn 360 degrees. 360. So if you think about it, its like a drive by. So lets let all the blacks go in and control the tanks. So we get into Iraq, and we have a drive by. With the increasing of this we can win!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she copied someone in an exam and got less than them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde asks a woman, "Excuse me, what time is it right now?" The woman replies, "It''s 11:25PM." The Blonde with a confused look on her face replies, "You know, it''s the weirdest thing. I''ve asked that question thirty times today and every time someone gives me a different answer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman wasn''t feeling well, so she asked a co-worker if she could recommend a doctor. "I know a very good doctor, but he is quite expensive. He charges $350 for the first visit, and $150 for each subsequent visit, but he really is quite good," replied the co-worker. The woman went to the doctor''s office and, trying to pull a fast one and save herself some money, she cheerfully announced, "I''m back!" Not fooled for a moment, the doctor gave her a quick exam and said, "Very good; now just continue the treatment I prescribed for you on your last visit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old hillbilly farmer with a severe case of hemorrhoids visited the doctor. The doctor prescribed some very powerful suppositories and asked the man to come back in a couple of weeks. The old farmer hadn''t used suppositories before, and didn''t realize they weren''t a pill to be taken orally. Two weeks later, the old farmer, in even more discomfort from the hemorrhoids, sees the doctor again. The doctor asks him how the suppositories are working? The old farmer says, "For all the good they did me, I might as well have shoved them up my ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A veterinarian was feeling ill, so he went to see his doctor. The doctor asked all the usual questions ... what symptoms did he have, how long had they been occurring, etc., when the vet interrupted him: "Look, doc, I''m a vet and I can''t ask my patients these questions. I can tell what''s wrong just by looking - why can''t you?" he said smugly. The doctor nodded, stood back and looked the vet up and down. He then quickly wrote out a prescription, handed it to the vet, and said, "There you go. Of course, you do understand that if that doesn''t work, we''ll have to have you put to sleep!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman was rushed to the hospital with appendicitis. The doctors operated and informed him that all went well. However, he kept feeling something pulling at the hairs on his chest. Concerned that there was a second surgery the doctors hadn''t told him about, he finally mustered up the energy to pull his hospital gown down far enough so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable. Taped firmly across his hairy chest were three wide strips of adhesive tape, the type that doesn''t come off easily. Written in large black letters was the sentence:- "Have a speedy recovery ... from the nurse you gave a ticket to last week."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Well, Jonathan, what are you going to do about the excess weight you''re carrying around? the doctor asked. "I don''t understand it, Doc," Jonathan replied, "I just can''t seem to lose weight. I must have an overactive thyroid." "Jonathan, the tests show that your thyroid is perfectly normal," replied the doctor. "It''s your fork that''s overactive."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While his mother was having a consultation with the doctor, Little Johnny could be heard terrorizing the people in the waiting room, yet she made no attempt to restrain him. A few minutes later, they heard some clattering in an adjoining room, but still she did nothing. Finally, after an extra-loud crash, she casually said to the doctor, "I hope you don''t mind Little Johnny playing in there." "No, not at all," the doctor replied calmly. "I''m sure he''ll calm down as soon as he finds the poison."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We regret to inform you, but by opening this email, you have just received the ''Idiot Computer Virus''. Since our staff does not have any programming experience, this virus works on the honor system. Please delete all files from your hard drive immediately, then manually forward this virus to everyone on your mailing list. Thank You', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the hardest thing about rollerblading? Telling your parents that you are gay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TO: ALL EMPLOYEES FROM: SYSTEM''S ADMINISTRATOR SUBJECT: WARNING! C-NILE VIRUS ... MUST READ: Just learned about this from a reliable source. It seems that there is a computer virus out there called the "C-Nile Virus" that even the most advanced programs from Norton cannot take care of, so be warned. It appears to affect those of us who were born before 1958. Symptoms of the C-Nile Virus: 1. Causes you to send the same e-mail twice. 2. Causes you to send blank e-mail. 3. Causes you to send e-mail to the wrong person. 4. Causes you to send e-mail back to the person who sent it to you. 5. Causes you to send e-mail to other listed persons who received the e-mail from the person who sent it to you. 6. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment. 7. Causes you to hit "SEND" before you''ve finished the', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the media askes George Bush a question about the war he says, "Uhh, Can I use a life line?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage "Marriages don''t last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?" - Rita Rudner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You could use your old computer to shop for a new computer online. But that seems kind of cruel, doesn''t it? Like asking your dying spouse if he or she has any cute friends. - Scott Ostler', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While getting dressed one morning, I decided I have been spending waaaaay too much time on the computer, when I caught myself checking the lower right corner of my make-up mirror to see what time it was. - Unknown', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lemon Grove A woman was applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove. When the foreman looked over her application, he felt she was far too qualified for the job. "Look, Miss Carter," said the foreman, "do you have any actual experience in picking lemons?" "Oh, yes, I certainly do," she replied. "I''ve been divorced four times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the salesman dropped in to pay a visit to one of his customers, he found the office empty except for a very large dog who was emptying wastebaskets. Rubbing his eyes, he was certain they must have been playing tricks on him. "Don''t look so surprised," said the dog, "after all, this is part of my job." "This is amazing!" exclaimed the salesman. "I can''t believe it. Does you boss know what a prize he has in you? An animal that can actually talk!" "No, no," the dog pleaded, "don''t tell him. If he knows I can talk, the next thing you know he''ll have me answering the phones too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Read All About It! A newsboy was standing at the corner with a stack of newspapers, yelling, "Read all about it! Fifty people swindled! Read all about it!" Curious about it, a man walked over and bought a newspaper. After checking the front page and finding nothing, he said to the boy, "What are you talking about? I don''t see anything in here about fifty people being swindled." The newsboy ignored him and continued, yelling out, "Read all about it! Fifty-one people swindled!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kids were sitting at a lunch table. One was quite a joke-teller, so he started telling a joke he had heard. "There are three types of people in this world," he said, "those who can count and those who can''t." The other kid said, "But what about the other type of person?" "There is no other type!" the first kid said, "that was the joke!" "No! You said it wrong! You didn''t say what the third type was!" "That was the joke! TWO TYPES of people in this world! Those who can count, AND THOSE WHO CANT!" "But you didn''t say what the third type was!" So, after many hours, the second boy FINALLY understood the joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No Smoking Prohibited Slow Children Warning: corners of sign are sharp A Street Downtown 1 Quarter Mile No Parking 2am-5am (right underneath that sign) 2 Hour parking 9am-6pm (right underneath that sign) 15 minute parking 8am-5pm Caution- water on road during rain Airplane Crossing Bear Bottom Drive Emergency telephone 174 km ahead Road hump ahead Tank Xing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recent college graduate got hired by the human-development center of a large corporation to train the employees in proper dress code and etiquette. One day as she was stepping onto the elevator, a man who was casually dressed in jeans and a golf shirt got on with her. "Dressed a little casually today, aren''t we?" she said in a scolding tone. "That''s one of the benefits of owning the company," the man replied with a grin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are Dogs Welcome? A man wrote a letter to a small hotel located in a Midwest town he planned to visit on his vacation. He wrote, "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is very well behaved and well groomed. I would like to know if I would be permitted to keep him in my room with me at night." The hotel owner sent a reply immediately, which said, "I have been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, I have never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or anything else. I have never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly, nor have I ever had a dog run out on a hotel bill. "Yes, indeed," continued his reply, "your dog is most welcome at my hotel. Should your dog be willing to vouch for you, you are welcome to stay here too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Collecting Unemployment Ole and Sven worked together and both were laid off, so they headed over to the unemployment office. When Ole was asked his occupation, he replied, "Panty stitcher. I sew elastic onto cotton panties." The clerk looked up panty stitcher and found it classed as unskilled labor, so she gave Ole $250 a week unemployment pay. She then asked Sven what his occupation was, and he replied, "Diesel fitter." Looking up diesel fitter, the clerk found it classed as skilled labor, so she gave Sven $500 a week. When Ole found out, he was furious. He stormed back in to find out why his friend and co-worker was collecting double the amount that he was. "Panty stitchers are unskilled and diesel fitters are skilled labor," the clerk explained. "What skill?" Ole yelled. "I sew the elastic on, Sven pulls on it and says, ''Ya, diesel fitter''!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Salary Increase "I must have a raise," the man said to his boss. "There are three other companies after me." "Really?" the boss asked. "What other companies are after you?" "The gas company, the telephone company, and the electricity company," the man replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I said to the taxi driver, "King Arthur''s Close." He said, "Don''t worry, we''ll lose him at the next set of lights." - Tommy Cooper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said "Is that the local swimming baths?" He said, "It depends where you''re calling from."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I inherited a painting and a violin which turned out to be a Rembrandt and a Stradivarius. Unfortunately, Rembrandt made lousy violins and Stradivarius was a terrible painter. - Tommy Cooper', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, carrying a baby in her arms, enters a pharmacy and asks to use the infant scale to weigh the baby. The clerk explains that the infant scale is out for repair, but she could figure out the infant''s weight by weighing mother and baby together on the adult scale, then weighing the mother alone and subtracting the second amount from the first. "Oh, that will never work!" groaned the blonde. "I''m not the mother, I''m the aunt!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown - and fewer still to ignore someone completely.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe no problem is so large or so difficult that it can''t be blamed on someone else.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father and his son, Bobby, arrive at the game - and Dad can''t find the tickets. Dad: "Nip home and see if I left the tickets there." Bobby: "No probs, Dad." Half an hour later Bobby returns to his dad who is patiently waiting outside the stadium. Bobby: "Yep, they''re on the kitchen table where you left them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very religious man lived right next door to an atheist. While the religious one prayed day in, day out, and was constantly on his knees in communion with his Lord, the atheist never even looked twice at a church. However, the atheist''s life was good, he had a well-paid job and a beautiful wife, and his children were healthy and good-natured, whereas the pious man''s job was strenuous and his wages were low, his wife was getting fatter every day and his kids wouldn''t give him the time of the day. So one day, deep in prayer as usual, he raised his eyes towards heaven and asked: "Oh God, I honour you every day, I ask your advice for every problem and confess to you my every sin. Yet my neighbour, who doesn''t even believe in you and certainly never prays, seems blessed with every happiness, while I go poor and suffer many an indignity. Why is this?" And a great voice was heard from above: "BECAUSE HE DOESN''T BOTHER ME ALL THE TIME!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women were sitting in the doctor''s waiting room comparing notes on their various disorders. "I want a baby more than anything in the world," said the first, "but I guess it is impossible." "I used to feel just the same way," said the second. "But then everything changed. That''s why I''m here. I''m going to have a baby in three months." "Please, tell me what you did." "I went to a faith healer." "But I''ve tried that. My husband and I went to one for nearly a year and it didn''t help a bit." The other woman whispered, "Try going alone next time, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is important - 1. It is important to find a woman who is a good cook and housekeeper. 2. It is important to find a woman who makes good money. 3. It is important to find a woman who likes to have sex regularly. 4. It is important that these three women never meet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joseph, Mary and their son were doing chores around their home in Nazareth when suddenly, Jesus ran outside to Joseph, and asked, "Did you call me?" "No, I''m sorry," Joseph replied, "I just hit my thumb with the hammer again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abraham wanted to put Windows Vista on his computer, but Isaac was concerned: "But father, we don''t have enough memory for that!" "Don''t worry, son, God will provide the RAM."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if you can''t make me a better boy, don''t worry about it. I''m having a real good time like I am."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old Jewish men are strolling down the street one day when they happen to walk by a Catholic church. They see a big sign posted that says, "Convert to Catholicism and get $10." One of the Jewish men stops walking and stares at the sign. His friend turns to him and says, "Murray, what''s going on?" "Abe," replies Murray, "I''m thinking of doing it." Abe says, "What, are you crazy?" Murray thinks for a minute and says, "Abe, I''m going to do it." With that, Murray strides purposefully into the church and comes out twenty minutes later with his head bowed. "So," asks Abe, "did you get your ten dollars?" Murray looks up at him and says, "Is that all you people think of?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just before a new redneck had his first parachute jump, his sergeant reminded him, "Count to ten, and then pull the first rip cord. If it snarls, pull the second rip cord for your auxiliary chute. After you land, our truck will pick you up." The paratrooper took a deep breath and jumped. He counted to ten and pulled the first cord. Nothing happened. He pulled the second cord. Again, nothing happened. As he plummeted to the ground, he said to himself, "I''ll bet that truck won''t be there either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you do settle in the South and bear children, don''t think we will accept them as Southerners. After all, if the cat had kittens in the oven, we wouldn''t call ''em biscuits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here in the Kentucky hills, you don''t see too many people hang-gliding. Ol'' Zeek decided to save up and get a hang-glider. He takes it to the highest mountain, and after struggling to the top, he gets ready to take flight. He takes off running and reaches the edge and into the wind he goes! Meanwhile, Maw & Paw Abner were sitting on the porch swing, talking bout the good old days when Maw spots the biggest bird she has ever seen! "Look at the size of that bird, Paw!" she exclaims. Paw raises up; "Get my gun, Maw." Maw runs into the house, brings out his pump action shotgun. He takes careful aim. BANG..BANG..BANG...BANG! The monster-size bird continues to sail silently over the treetops. "I think ya missed him, Paw," she says. "Yeah," he replies, "but at least he let go of old Zeek!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you be sad when you are at the Sunshine Happiness Parade of Friendly Friends?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redneck Threats: - I''ll slap you so hard, your clothes will be outtalk style. - This''ll jar your preserves. - Don''t you be making'' me open a can o'' whoop-ass on yaw!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ah - The things you see with. Ay-rab - The people who inhabit much of North Africa. Bidness - The art of selling something for more than you paid for it. Bobbycue - A delectable Southern sandwich of chopped pork, coleslaw, and a fiery sauce. Bud - Small feathered creature that flies. Chekatawfarya - Heard at service stations in small Southern towns. Co-Cola - Soft drink. Crine - Weeping. Dawfins - Name of the professional football team in Miami. Doc - A condition caused by the absence of light. Etlanna - The city General Sherman burned during the war for Southern independence. Everthang - All-encompassing. Foller - Spies and private detectives spend a lot of time doing this. Git - To acquire. Goff - A game played with clubs and a little white ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gull - A young female. Hale - Where General Sherman went for what he did to Etlanna. Moanin - Between daybreak and noon. Motuhsickle - A two-wheeled missile with a powerful engine. Nekkid - To be unclothed. Ovair - In that direction. Own - Instead of awf. Phrasin - Very cold. Sebmup - Soft drink similar to ginger ale. Show - "It show is hot today." Spearmint - Something scientist do. Stow - Place where things are sold. Tal - What you dry off with after you take a share. Uhmukin - Someone who lives in the United States of Uhmurka. Zackly Precisely.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redneck Compliments - Cute as a sack full of puppies. - If things get any better, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it. - Gooder than grits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Alabama the smartest state in the U.S.? It has four "A"s and a "B".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think I''m a redneck tell that to my kids: Bobby Sue, Buck, Jim Bob, Bubba, Enus, Jed, Dwayne, Billy Bob, Clitus, Dale, Otis, Coy, Bo, Hattie, Cooter, Wade, Larlene, Clint, Delmont and Luther.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People always say that hard work never killed anybody. Oh yeah? When''s the last time ya ever heard of anyone who "rested to death?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The boss, to four of his employees: "I''m really sorry, but I''m going to have to let one of you go." Black employee: "I''m a protected minority." Female employee: "And I''m a woman." Oldest employee: "Fire me, buster, and I''ll hit you with an age discrimination suit so fast it''ll make your head spin." ...at which they all turn to look at the helpless young, white, male employee, who thinks a moment, then responds: "I think I might be gay..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two detectives were investigating a scene, The victims had their hands and head cut off. "It''s going to be a nightmare identifying the bodies, with no finger prints or faces" said one. The other replied, "I thought it would be rather easy, how many people do you know walking around with no head or hands?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Carton of eggs~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ $3 Ski mask~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ $14 Tickets to a Brittany concert~~~~~~ $84 Egging the crap out of America''s Pop Princess?? PRICELESS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The company I work for sometimes puts on what they call "Lunch and Learn" seminars during the employees'' lunchtime, dealing with a variety of physical and mental health issues. If the seminar lasts beyond the normal lunch hour, we''re supposed to get managerial approval to attend. So, last week, this flier came around: LUNCH AND LEARN SEMINAR: WHO''S CONTROLLING YOUR LIFE? (Get your manager''s permission before attending)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mistake: to err, to cause an error or make a mess; If a barber makes a mistake, it''s a new style... If a driver makes a mistake, it is an accident... If a politician makes a mistake, it is a new law... If a scientist makes a mistake, it is a new invention... If a tailor makes a mistake, it is a new fashion... If a teacher makes a mistake, it is a new theory... If our boss makes a mistake, it is our mistake... If an employee makes a mistake, it is a "MISTAKE."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill today because they pissed me off. Also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today, as they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a women found out that she was pregnant, she lit up the phone lines telling everyone the good news. One day, she took her 4 year old son, Sam, out shopping. A woman asked the boy if he was excited about the baby. "Yes," he said. "I know what we''re going to name it. If it is a girl, we''re calling her Molly and if it is a boy, we''re going to call it Quits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Happiness doesn''t bring money. I want to be what I was when I wanted to be what I''m now. The government has at least one problem for every solution. Only the conservatives can make the country like it used to be - a huge swamp full of dinosaurs. Democracy is having freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the thoughtfulness to use neither one. If you don''t go to other people''s funerals, they won''t come to yours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of Jew baritones and sopranos singing? Soap opera.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the Broadway showgirls were dressing for a performance, one of them noticed her friend was no longer sporting a flashy engagement ring. "What happened, Lily?" she asked, pointing to the bare finger. "The wedding off?" "Yeah," Lily admitted. "I saw him in a bathing suit last week, and he looked so different without his wallet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in the days of old, Before condoms were invented, Knights wrapped socks Around their cocks, And babies were prevented.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things You Don''t Want to Hear When Regaining Consciousness. Has anyone seen my watch? That was some party last night. I can''t remember when I''ve been that drunk. Well, this book doesn''t say that... What edition is your manual? Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie. If I can just remember how they did this on ER last week. What do you mean, he''s not insured? Let''s hurry; I don''t want to miss "Baywatch." That laughing gas stuff is pretty cool. Can I have some more of that? Of course I''ve performed this operation before, Nurse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a little list of "Doc-isms" - What doctors say, and what they''re really thinking: "I''d like to have my associate look at you." He''s going through a messy divorce and owes me a bundle. "Do you suppose all this stress could be affecting your nerves?" You''re crazier''n a loon. Now, if I can only find a shrink who''ll split fees with me ... "There is a lot of that going around." My God, that''s the third one this week. I''d better learn something about this. "If those symptoms persist, call for an appointment." I''ve never heard of anything so disgusting. Thank God I''m off next week. "Why don''t we make another appointment later in the week?" I''m playing golf this afternoon, and this a waste of time. - or - I need the bucks, so I''m charging you for another office visit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a stifling hot day and a man fainted in the middle of a busy intersection. Traffic quickly piled up in all directions, and a woman rushed to help him. When she knelt down to loosen his collar, a man emerged from the crowd, pushed her aside, and said, "It''s all right honey, I''ve had a course in first aid." The woman stood up and watched as he took the ill man''s pulse and prepared to administer artificial respiration. At this point she tapped him on the shoulder and said, "When you get to the part about calling a doctor, I''m already here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A defendant was asked if he wanted a bench trial or a jury trial. "Jury trial," the defendant replied. "Do you understand the difference?" asked the judge. "Sure," replied the defendant, "That''s where twelve ignorant people decide my fate instead of one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Judge: Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this case? Juror: I don''t want to be away from my job that long. Judge: Can''t they do without you at work? Juror: Yes, but I don''t want them to know it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, but you can never fool a Mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children are natural mimics, who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is only one pretty child in the world and every parent has it. - Chinese Proverb. A child''s greatest period of growth is the month after you''ve purchased new school clothes. The best inheritance parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married couple was celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. At the party everybody wanted to know how they managed to stay married so long in this day and age. The husband responded, "When we were first married we came to an agreement - I would make all the major decisions and my wife would make all the minor decisions. And now, after 60 years of marriage, I can truthfully say that we have never needed to make a MAJOR decision."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One way to take care of the world''s population. The IRS has reported the "disappearance" of more than 8 million American children during the late 1980s, "caused" by tax reform legislation. That number is the total of all children claimed as dependents of beneficiaries of child care tax credits before 1987 but who were never again claimed once the IRS started requiring proof that such children existed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little four-year-old Jenny was looking at her new baby brother for the first time. He was fast asleep. After staring at her tiny, motionless baby brother for a few minutes, Jenny looked up at her mother and asked plaintively, "Didn''t he come with batteries?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My husband and I had just finished tucking our five young ones into bed one evening when we heard sobbing coming from three-year-old Billy''s room. Rushing to his side, we found him crying hysterically. He had accidentally swallowed a penny and was sure he was going to die - no amount of talking could change his mind. Desperate to calm him, my husband palmed a penny that he happened to have in his pocket and pretended to pull it from Billy''s ear. Billy was delighted. In a flash, he snatched it from my husband''s hand, swallowed it, and demanded cheerfully, "Do it again, Dad!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman and her lover are in bed, when there''s a knock on the door. She says, "It must be my husband! Ok, I''ll handle this." She grabs the trash bin, opens the door and, smiling sweetly, says to her husband, "Darling, please empty the trash." While he is out, the other man escapes and walks back home. He thinks, "She is sooo smart, unlike my wife." He comes up to his door and knocks, his wife opens the door, and hands him the trash bin, saying, "Darling, please empty the trash bin." He carries the basket, thinking, "What a stupid bitch! The whole damn day at home, and can''t find some time to empty the trash!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a girl needs advice, why can''t her brother help her? Because he can''t be a brother and assist her too. (And a sister too!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A precocious 4-year-old was brought to the ER with a severe cough, a nurse writes. She kept up a non-stop conversation while I was trying to assess her lung sounds. Finally, I said, "Shhh, I have to see if Barney is in there." The child looked at me and said, "I have Jesus in my heart. Barney is on my underwear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think - therefore I''m single. (Lizz Winstead) In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. (Margaret Thatcher) When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. (Elayne Boosler) I''m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I''m not dumb... and I also know that I''m not blonde. (Dolly Parton) I''m not going to vacuum ''till Sears makes one you can ride on. (Roseanne Barr) If men can run the world, why can''t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck? (Linda Ellerbee)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I only know the names of two angels. Hark and Harold. Gregory, 5 Everybody''s got it all wrong. Angels don''t wear halos any more. I forget why, but scientists are working on it. Olive, 9 It''s not easy to become an angel! First, you die. Then you go to heaven, and then there''s still the flight training to go through. And then you got to agree to wear those angel clothes. Matthew, 9 Angels work for God and watch over kids when God has to go do something else. Mitchell, 7 My guardian angel helps me with math, but he''s not much good for science. Henry, 8 Angels don''t eat, but they drink milk from Holy Cows! Jack, 6 Angels talk all the way while they''re flying you up to heaven. The main subject is where you went wrong before you got dead. Daniel, 9', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When an angel gets mad, he takes a deep breath and counts to ten. And when he lets out his breath, somewhere there''s a tornado. Reagan, 10 Angels have a lot to do and they keep very busy. If you lose a tooth, an angel comes in through your window and leaves money under your pillow. Then when it gets cold, angels go north for the winter. Sara, 6 Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his son, who''s a very good carpenter. Jared, 8 All angels are girls because they gotta wear dresses and boys didn''t go for it. Antonio, 9 My angel is my grandma who died last year. She got a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth. Katelynn, 9 Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and pets. And if they don''t make the animals get better, they help the child get over it. Vicki, 8 What I don''t get about angels is why, when someone is in love, they shoot arrows at them. Sarah, 7', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man rushed into a bar and ordered a double martini. The man downed it with one swallow, put a five dollar bill on the bar, and turned and rushed out of the bar. The bartender picked up the five dollar bill, and folded it carefully and tucked it in his vest pocket. Just at that moment he looked up at the boss standing in the doorway staring at him. Doing a bit of fast thinking he said, "Hi boss, did you see that fellow just now? Came in here, bought a double martini, gave me a five dollar tip, and rushed out without paying."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t you take a Pokemon in the shower with you? Answer: Because it''ll Pikachu! (peek at you...)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sitting in a bar and noticed a group of people using sign language. He also noticed that the bartender was using sign language to speak to them. When the bartender returned to him, the man asked how he had learned to use sign language. The bartender explained that these were regular customers and had taught him to speak in sign. The man thought that was great. A few minutes later the man noticed that the people in the group were waving their hands around very wildly. The bartender looked over and signed, "Now cut that out! I warned you!" and threw the group out of the bar. The man asked why he had done that and the bartender said, "If I''ve told them once I''ve told them 100 times - NO SINGING IN THE BAR!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s forty below zero one winter "night" in Alaska. Pat is drinking at his local saloon and the bartender says to him, "You owe me quite a bit on your tab." "Sorry," says Pat, "I''m flat broke this week." "That''s okay," says the bartender. "I''ll just write your name and the amount you owe me right here on the wall." "But," says Pat, "I don''t want any of my friends to see that." "They won''t," says the bartender. "I''ll just hang your parka over it until it''s paid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a martini. The bartender asks, "Olive or twist?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a bird and a fly? Well, a bird can fly . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man applied for a job as an industrial spy. Together with several other applicants, he was given a sealed envelope and told to take it to the fourth floor. As soon as the man was alone, he stepped into an empty hallway and opened the envelope. Inside, a message read: "You''re our kind of person. Report to the fifth floor Personnel Office."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their jobs. Sam Goldwyn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After Receiving an Invitation to an Inventors'' Ball: Edison thought it would be an illuminating experience. Watt reckoned it would be a good way to let off steam. Stephenson thought the whole idea was loco. Wilbur Wright accepted, provided he and Orville could get a flight. Morse''s reply: "I''ll be there on the dot. Can''t stop now must dash."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Psychiatrist to his nurse: "Just say we''re very busy. Don''t keep saying ''It''s a madhouse.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the dentist of the year get? ..A little plaque.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know policemen are strong? Because they can hold up traffic. What do termites eat for breakfast? Oakmeal. What do massage therapists eat for dinner? Spa-ghetti. Why were the suspenders arrested? For holding up a pair of pants. How does the queen bee get around her hive? She''s throne. What do bees do if they don''t want to drive? Wait at the buzz stop. Two fish were in a tank. One said to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?" What''s the friendliest school? Hi school. What do you give a dog with a fever? Mustard. (It''s good for a hot dog.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frank was getting ready to go on a trip to New York for the first time, and was talking to his friend Bill. Bill: "While you are in New York, there is a bar that you have to go to. When you walk through the front door, you are handed a free drink. Then you can go to the back room and get laid. Come back up to the bar, and you get another free drink. Then you can get laid again. It goes on like this all night." Frank: "That sounds unbelievable. Have you really been there?" Bill: "No, but my sister has."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. None. It''s all right. I''ll just sit here in the dark. Don''t worry about me...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harry was in the hospital. He was an old man, and from time to time the young nurse would come in and say in a patronising tone, "And how are we doing this morning?" Well, this is a story of revenge. Harry had received breakfast, and had taken the juice off the tray, putting it on his stand. Now, he had been given a urine bottle to fill - the juice was apple juice; you know where the juice went. The nurse came in, picked up the urine bottle and said, "It seems we are a little cloudy today..." At this, Harry snatched the bottle out of her hand, and drank the contents, saying, "Well, I''ll run it through again, maybe I can filter it better this time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can a person living in Minnesota be buried in Milwaukee?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I passed my ethics exam. Naturally, I cheated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pablo Picasso surprised a burglar at work in his new chateau. The intruder got away, but Picasso told the police he could do a rough sketch of what he looked like. On the basis of his drawing, the police arrested a mother superior, the minister of finance, a washing machine, and the Eiffel tower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve just had the most awful time, said a boy to his friends. "First I got angina pectoris, then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering, I got psoriasis. They gave me hypodermics, and to top it all, tonsillitis was followed by appendectomy." "Wow! How did you pull through?" sympathized his friends. "I don''t know," the boy replied. "Toughest spelling test I ever had."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English professor complained to the pet shop proprietor, "The parrot I purchased uses improper language." "I''m surprised," said the owner. "I''ve not taught that bird to swear." "Oh, it isn''t that," explained the professor, "but yesterday I heard him split an infinitive."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two anthropologists fly to the South Sea islands to study the natives. They go to two adjacent islands and set to work. A few months later one of them takes a canoe over to the other island to see how his colleague is doing. When he gets there, he finds the other anthropologist standing among a group of natives. "Greetings! How is it going?" says the visiting anthropologist. "Wonderful!" says the other, "I have discovered an important fact about the local language! Watch!" He points at a palm tree and says, "What is that?" The natives, in unison, say "Umbalo-gong!" He then points at a rock and says, "and that?" The natives again intone "Umbalo-gong!" "You see!" says the beaming anthropologist, "They use the SAME word for ''rock'' and for ''palm tree''!" "That is truly amazing!" says the astonished visiting anthropologist, "On the other island, the same word means ''index finger''!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tourist was being led through the swamps of Florida. "Is it true," he asked, "that an alligator won''t attack you if you carry a flashlight?" "That depends," replied the guide, "on how fast you carry the flashlight."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went into a deli shop and took a seat at the lunch counter. "Give me a corned beef sandwich," he ordered. "Corned beef sandwich is not on the menu, but I can give you a sandwich with corned beef in it, like our Midnight Special." "What''s a Midnight Special?" "A triple decker with corned beef, tongue, bologna, tomato, lettuce, onion, pickle and mayonnaise, on toasted raisin bread." "Could you just place a piece of corned beef between two slices of white bread and serve it to me on a plate?" "Why, sure!" Then, turning to the sandwich man, he sang out: "One Midnight Special. Make it one deck, hold the tongue, bologna, tomato, lettuce, onion, pickle and mayonnaise, and make the raisin bread white, untoasted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An agriculture student said to a farmer: "Your methods are too old-fashioned. I wouldn''t be surprised if this tree gave you less than twenty pounds of apples." "Wouldn''t surprise me, either," said the farmer, "this is an orange tree."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The person who spends all of today bragging about what he is going to accomplish tomorrow probably did the very same thing yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Any time four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t argue with an idiot. He may be doing the same thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do not try to guess your wife''s size. Just buy her anything marked "petite" and hold on to the receipt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knowledge cannot enter the head via an open mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Astronomy is looking up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rap is to music as Etch-A-Sketch is to fine art.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Join the fight against brutality.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Helen Waite is our credit manager. If you want credit, go to Helen Waite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why isn''t there a tax on stuff I DON''T like?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day at a school for the deaf (hearing impaired), they decide to have one of the students lead a pep rally for the football team. Here''s how it went. Rally leader: What are we gonna do? Ralliers: Defeat them! RL: I can''t hear you! R: Defeat them! RL: I can''t hear you! R: Defeat them! RL: I can''t hear you! R: Defeat them! RL: I can''t hear you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at a party and the host was getting worried because there were too many people and not enough refreshments. She was sure that not all of these people had been invited but didn''t know how to tell which ones were the crashers. Then her husband got an idea.... He turned to the crowd of guests and said, "Will those who are from the bride''s side of the family stand up please?" About twenty people stood. Then he asked, "Will those who are from the groom''s side of the family stand up as well?" About twenty five people stood up. Then he smiled and said, "Will all those who stood please leave, this is a birthday party."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, two children are bickering on the playground. Kid 1: My mom says that kids who get whatever they want are spoiled and rotten and stuck-up. Kid 2: Well, I''m not spoiled. Kid 1: Yeah, you are, you get everything you want. Kid 2: I don''t get everything I want. Kid 1: Yeah, you do. Kid 2: No, I don''t, because I "want" you to shut-up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a shepherd you herd your sheep into your barn. As you walk away you hear two wolves in the barn. What do you do? I would get the flock out of there!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following is something actually said by my dad. I wanted to see what my dad would say if I said I might be gay, here was his reaction. YOU''D BETTER NOT BE!! EVEN IF I HAVE TO BUY YOU SOME PUSSY, YOU WILL NOT BE GAY!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they call it "PMS"? Because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken. (Apologies to anyone who''s offended - but it IS funny, which is the only valid test of a joke; if it''s funny and someone is offended by it, considering WHY they''re offended even though it''s a joke can provide insight into their attitude toward the topic.) "I learned the truth from Lenny Bruce" - Paul Simon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marble is a valuable building material and should not be taken for granite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned French in six easy liasons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a man wants to believe something, it doesn''t take much to convince him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Earlier today, I took a glimpse at the news. They were doing a report on a new recipe for twinkies. Now they will taste healthier, but still have the same amount of calories, because of course, people can taste health.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re multipurpose. Not only do they put the clips on, but they take them off. - Pratt & Whitney spokesperson explaining why the company charged the Air Force nearly $1000 for an ordinary pair of pliers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers. - Socrates (470 - 399 BC)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('British Columbia, Canada: Police officers on patrol about 1:00 am spotted 4 men breaking into a vehicle. They gave chase on foot, catching and arresting two of the men. The other two escaped. A couple of hours later, two men showed up at the main desk of the police station, asking when their buddies were going to be released. They were carrying (and wearing) items which had been stolen from the car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Democratic National Committee finally released thousands of pages of financial disclosure information. Says Vince Vieceli, "Unfortunately, they released them from a third-floor balcony in New York during the parade for the Yankees."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 10pm curfew was imposed in Belfast, and everybody had to be off the streets or risk being shot. However, one citizen was shot at 9.45pm. "Why did you do that?" the soldier was asked by his superior officer. "I know where he lives," came the reply, "and he wouldn''t have made it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pet shop and says to the owner, "Do your Shih Tzu dogs breed well?" The owner says,"Sure they do." After a minute, the man says, with a grin, "What about your bull dogs?" "Yes they breed well, too." The man, happy with this, buys both. The owner asks, "Why do you need to know that anyway?" The man replies, "I''m going to go home and breed a bullshit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(Told You So)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you want me to give you a knuckle sandwich? "Sure, but I want it cut into triangles and with the crust peeled off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seems Paris Hilton is having visits from a speech therapist - she''s having trouble finishing a sentence!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grocery List; (noun) A piece of paper you spend half an hour writing, and then forget to take with you to the store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lipstick; (noun) On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Foreign Film Any movie shown in a Texas theater that isn''t a western.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Battle Where a whole lot of white men kill a few Indians. Massacre Where a whole lot of Indians kill a few white men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man A remarkable animal whose head swells when you pat his back. Woman Creature who acts nice to you because she doesn''t like you, or mean, because she does. People Some make things happen, some watch things happen, and the majority has no idea what''s happened. Optimist Girl who regards a bulge as a curve. Pessimist Man who looks for a pink slip before the money in his pay envelope.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Magazine Bunch of printed pages that tell you what''s coming in the next issue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond man, Mark, was going to France over the summer. So he asked the advice of his friend, who had been to Paris last year. "Oh!" his friend said, "The food in France is fabulous! Be sure to ask about their frog legs." "FROG legs? Really?" Mark couldn''t believe it. "Yeah. It seems strange, doesn''t it?" Mark agreed to ask. A month later, Mark flew to France. He had a wonderful time seeing the sights, and forgot all about his friend''s advice until his very last night, right before dinner. He was already seated at a table, and soon a waiter walked up to him to take his order. "Well..." Mark pondered, "I''m not sure what I want." He decided to ask, then and there. "Say- do you have frog legs?" "But of course!" replied the waiter, proud of the quality of his restaurant. Mark turned a shade of white. It was true! "Are you okay, sir?" "I''m... fine," Mark said, recovering well, "Hop on over and bring me a sandwich!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Henry IV were cloned, would he be Henry V, or Henry IV Jr. or, would he be Henry IV Part II? (Willy Wagstaff, more usually known as William Shakespeare)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Another Month Ends: All Targets Met, All Systems Working, All Customers Satisfied, All Staff Eager and Enthusiastic, All Pigs Fed and Ready to Fly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I travelled to the end of the rainbow, As Dame Fortune did intend, Murphy would be there to tell me, The pot''s at the other end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elephant is talking to a hippopotamus, and the elephant says, "You know, there''s nothing worse than a cold in the nose." The hippo says, "Oh yeah? Did you never have chapped lips?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cleanliness is next to Godliness Why do they say that? I looked it up in the dictionary, "goggles" is next to "godliness"; cleanliness is next to claustrophobia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What sits on a window sill, hums, and dies mysteriously 91 days after you bring it home? - An air conditioner with a 90 day warranty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do melons get married in church? - Because they cantaloupe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are a lot of words you can use to describe men -strong, caring, loving. They''d be wrong, but you could still use them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Newton''s Little-Known Seventh Law - A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy''s Law of Cable TV If you have watched a TV series only once, and you watch it again, it will be a rerun of the same episode.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old lady goes into the store to do some shopping. She is bewildered over the large selection of toilet paper. "Pardon me, sir," she says to the store manager, "but can you explain the differences in all these toilet papers?" "Well," he replies pointing out one brand, "this is as soft as a baby''s kiss. It''s $1.50 per roll." He grabs another and says, "This is nice and soft as a bunny, strong but gentle, and it''s $1.00 a roll." Pointing to the bottom shelf he tells her, "We call that our No Name brand, and it''s 20 cents per roll." "Give me the No Name," she says. She comes back about a week later, seeks out the manager and says, "Hey! I''ve got a name for your No Name toilet paper. I call it John Wayne." "Why?" he asks. "Because it''s ROUGH, it''s TOUGH and it DON''T TAKE CRAP OFF ANYBODY!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t you have some laundry to do or something? Oh, you are so cute when you get all pissed off. You''re just upset because your butt is beginning to spread. Wait a minute - I get it. What time of the month is it? Shouldn''t you consult the great Oprah on this one? Sorry. I was just picturing you naked. Whoa, time out. Football is on. Looks like someone had an extra bowl of B#%$@! flakes this morning! Is there any way we can do this via e-mail? Who are you kidding? We both know that thing ain''t loaded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember the Golden Rule He who has the gold makes the rules.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just when you get really good at something, you don''t need to do it any more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just when you find something you really like, they stop making it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prudhomme''s Law of Window Washing It''s on the OTHER side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Bush toured parts of Missouri that were devastated by a recent tornado. There was one awkward moment, when the President looked at the tornado damage and said, "Don''t worry, we''re going to get whoever did this."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What kind of soup do dogs like? A: Chicken Poodle! ___________________________________________ Q: Why DIDN''T the skeleton cross the road? A: Because he didn''t have the guts! ___________________________________________ Q: What''s purple and makes you burp? A: BELCH''S Grape Juice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Aquariums + Gratitude = FISH THANKS! 2. Orange Bear + A Ghost = WINNIE THE BOO! 3. Saint Nick + A Grizzly Bear = Santa Claws! 4. Skunk + Kangaroo = STINK-A-ROO!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sheriff of the small Kansas town pulled over a Porsche that was doing 75 miles per hour in a 35 mile an hour zone. The man behind the wheel, a Chicago commodities trader, was steaming. When he was finally brought before the local magistrate, he exploded, "I can''t believe you stopped me. This town must be the asshole of the world!" The magistrate replied, "And you''ll be what''s passing through?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People who want to inform you of their religious views almost never want to hear yours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Covina, Calif: I recall reading something years ago about the Pledge of Allegiance. Some child thought it began, "I led the pigeons to the flag." Cleveland, Ohio: When I was little, I often wondered who Richard Stands was. You know - "I pledge allegiance to the flag and to the Republic for Richard Stands."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anybody can win. Unless, of course, there happens to be a second entry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A person soon learns how little he knows when a child begins to ask questions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A business man in Chicago had occasion to write a Japanese friend in Tokyo. Mindful of the Oriental''s appreciation of flowery language and of his own duty to the cause of good public relations, he ended his letter with the wish, "May Heaven preserve you always." To the delight of the business man''s office staff, the Japanese responded with, "May Heaven pickle you, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The one who says it cannot be done should never interrupt the one who is doing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. All of you, stand in a straight circle. 2. I have two daughters, and both are girls! 3. Both the three of you get out of the class. 4. I saw you with my wife.....in the theatre. 5. Open the windows let the Airforce come in. 6. Boys go to the right, girls to the left. The rest follow me. 7. How dare you look at the monkey outside the window when I''m sitting here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All things are possible - except skiing through a revolving door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man woke up in the morning to see that the whole house was all messy. Clothes were all over the room. Coffee beans were spilled on the kitchen floor. Even the house was teepeed with toilet paper. Back in the living room, a note read: Dear Honey, I have gone shopping for a little while. Sorry if I left the house a little messy. I don''t know when I''ll be back. After reading the note, he calls her. "Where are the couch, TV, and coffee machine?" "Uhh, that''s a funny story." She hangs up, and their 23-year old son walks in. "Austin! Where is my wife?" "Oh, that. You drank like crazy and fell asleep. When she was pulling you back to bed, you woke up, punched her, spun her around in the air and threw her in the toilet. She told me she would move after I trashed the place with her." "So whose wife was that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a redneck is married? There are tobacco stains on both sides of his pickup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All members of Mensa have I.Q.s of at least 140. At one Mensa convention, several members at a local cafe noticed the shaker with an S on top, for salt, contained pepper and their pepper shaker, with a P on top, was full of salt. How could they swap the contents of the bottles without spilling anything and using only the implements at hand? Clearly, here was the marvellous Mensa mystery! They presented ideas, debated them, and finally came up with what they felt was a brilliant solution involving a napkin, a straw, and an empty saucer. They called the blonde waitress over to dazzle her with their solution. "Ma''am," they said, "we couldn''t help but notice that the pepper shaker contains salt and the salt shaker contains..." "Oh, sorry!" interrupted the blonde waitress. "Here," and she unscrewed the caps of both bottles and switched them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 6''4" man hit a midget in the rear while at a red light. The midget gets out of his car and comes up to the man and says, "I''m NOT happy!" and the man replied, "Which one are you, then?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A terrific explosion occurs in a gunpowder factory, and once all the mess has been cleared up, and inquiry begins. One of the few survivors is asked to make a statement. "Okay, Phillips," says the investigator, "you were near the scene - what happened?" "Well, it''s like this. Old Fred Wilson was in the mixing room, and I saw him take a cigarette out of his pocket and light up." "He was smoking in the mixing room?" the investigator said in stunned horror, "How long had he been with the company?" "About 20 years, sir." "Twenty years in the company, then he goes and strikes a match in the mixing room! I''d have thought it would have been the last thing he''d have done." "It was, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so heavy that she sank the Titanic. Yo Momma so stupid that she came up to George Bush and called him gay and Hitler #2. Yo Momma so old that she saw Abraham Lincoln die. Yo Momma so slow that she was mistaken for a rock. Yo Momma so stupid that she thinks she''s a man! Yo Momma so weak that when she walks into a bar they have to feed her like a baby!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a king who was memorizing a script to tell everyone in the land that everyone got free chocolate. But really it was filled with poison to kill them all. A guard walked by and said in a whisper, "Remember it is filled with poison, but do not say it is filled with poison. Understand?" The King responded, "Yes, I do." The king was deaf in one ear so he often times missed what people say. He walked up to the microphone. He said, "I know you all love delicous chocolate. So I''ve decided to give you all special gift. Who want''s to know?" Everyone hollered out "I do!" So the king hollered, "Okay then! Free Poisonous Chocolate for all!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A busdriver was driving 50 kids to camp. They were passing a big deep lake that was beautiful and cyan. One kid asked the nice busdriver, "Can we go in that lake?" The busdriver replies "sure. can you swim?" The kids say, "Yes but only in very, very shallow water." The busdriver never saw this lake before, he thought it was shallow. People nearby were stunned to see a bus full of kids turn and drive right into the lake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend works in a post office. One day, a man handed ten postcards to my friend and ask her to put them in the mailbox. She noticed that they had all been addressed but none of them contained a message, so she asked the man why the postcards nothing written on them. The man said, "I told everyone that I''d send postcards, but I didn''t say I''d write a message."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bachelor asked his friend to find him the perfect mate: "I want a companion who is small and cute, loves water sports and enjoys group activities." Without thinking, his friend replied: "Marry a penguin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves. - W. C. Fields.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandson is four and can recite the whole Gettysburg Address. Abraham Lincoln couldn''t do it until he was fifty-four. - Sam Levenson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quick - Cheap - Good Pick 2. - Dennis Robertus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('America is a land of untold wealth. - Internal Revenue Service.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a boy who never, ever lied. He always told people the truth and/or his opinion. Like when he broke a glass vase, he said that he broke it. He was rewarded a few days later for telling the truth, even though he was grounded. One day a lady asked him, "What do you think of my dress? It cost me thousands of dollars." The boy replied, "That is the most stupid dress I have ever seen in my life, and will haunt me in my afterlife! It''s more terrible than a fifty-year old swine that was drowned in mud when it was three! I think you should go back to the garbage disposal and feed it to a goat!" He said all that truthfully. After he said that, the lady called 911 and he went to juvenile hall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a customer walked into a pet shop and told the clerk, "I need two small, gray mice and about five dozen roaches." Puzzled, the shop attendant asked the reason for this strange request. "Well, I''m moving out of my apartment and my lease told me that I must leave the premises in exactly the same condition I found them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a magical mirror that showed the prettiest and ugliest people in the world. The mirror said that May Honzirop was the prettiest and the ugliest was Shakira Hobo. May was going to go in front of millions of people to get a Guinness world record. The mirror said, the day before May went on stage, "I think you''ll brag about all your "success" and just become unpopular again." May replied, "SHUT UP, YOU STUPID MIRROR! I WILL THROW YOU AWAY AFTER I''M DONE!" It was the next day. She was on stage with Shakira Hobo. She announced, "Now the mirror will choose the prettiest and the ugliest people." The mirror was still upset, but decided to answer anyway. The mirror announced to about 25 million people, "The prettiest person is Shakira Hobo, and the ugliest is May Honzirop, and that is the truth!" Everyone laughed at May. The mirror said, "Payback!" A minute later, May was pelted with tomatoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John always bullied Pat, so Pat invited him to the meat factory. The next day, on the menu at McDonalds, there was a new thing called: Bully Big Mac, and John french fries.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Little Susie got her "monthly bleeding" for the first time in her life. Having failed to understand what was going on and being really frightened, she decided to share her trouble with little Johnny. Having found Johnny she told and showed him what her problem was. Johnny''s face grew serious and he said, "You know, I''m not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three gay guys where swiming in a pool, some white stuff floats to the top, and one of the gay guys screams, "Alright, who farted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Mexican''s favorite sport!? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Cross Country', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four blondes are shipwrecked on an island. They meet a wizard who is very bored and gives them each one wish. The first one is too stupid to listen to the wizard and she swims away and drowns. The second one says, "I wish I was 10 times as smart as I am now," and she makes a wooden raft and floats away. The third one says, "I wish I was 100 times smarter than I am now," and she builds a rowboat and rows to the mainland. The last one says, "I wish I was a 100,000,000,000,000 times smarter than those three combined," and she turns into a man and walks acrosss the bridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New Yorker, a redneck and a Mexican go in to the bathroom, and start to wash. The Mexican and the New Yorker start to wash their hands. The Mexican says, "At my school they taught me to use a paper towel to dry your hands, so they get dry." The New Yorker says, "My teacher told me to use the dryers, so we save trees." At that time, the red neck finishes his ''business'', and right before opening the bathroom door, the Mexican said, "Gross, man, you did not wash your hands!" The redneck says, "Well, my teacher taught me to not piss on my hands."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, she hangs the toilet paper out to dry!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a woman with no asshole? Divorced.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(A continuation of Joke #7939 Idiot #9 - - - - - - A woman called the cops from her house and said, "My ex-boyfriend stole my pot!" So the police went to the ex-boyfriends house, took the marijuana, and arrested him. The same officer went to the woman''s house and asked her to identify if it was her pot. She confirmed it was hers, and was taken away in the police car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt. - Abraham Lincoln.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. - Thomas Alva Edison.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one book, what would it be? I always say, "How to Build a Boat". - Steven Wright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you like the new car Alice and I just bought? Tom asked onerously.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man looked a little worried when the doctor came in to administer his annual physical, so the first thing the doctor did was to ask whether anything was troubling him. "Well, to tell the truth, Doc, yes," answered the patient. "You see, I seem to be getting forgetful. I''m never sure I can remember where I put the car, or whether I answered a letter, or where I''m going, or what it is I''m going to do once I get there - if I get there; so I really need your help. What can I do?" The doctor mused for a moment, then answered in his kindest tones, "Pay me in advance."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our young daughter had adopted a stray cat. To my distress, he began to use the back of our new sofa as a scratching post. "Don''t worry," my husband reassured me. "I''ll have him trained in no time." I watched for several days as my husband patiently "trained" our new pet. Whenever the cat scratched, my husband deposited him outdoors to teach him a lesson. The cat learned quickly. For the next 16 years, whenever he wanted to go outside, he scratched the back of the sofa.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t you tell a secret around a clock? Because time will tell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a really big joke? JOKE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a backwards joke? ekoj', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with ''P'' and ends in ''orn'' : Popcorn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this cat who loved to get drunk, who went to the bar on the other side of the tracks. He stayed all night long and got so wasted he could barely stand up, much less walk. The cat starts to stumble home, and when he came to the train tracks, he didn''t notice a train coming down the tracks. As he started to cross the tracks, the train zoomed by, and cut off his tail. The cat turned his head to see the damage, got his head stuck into the side of a speeding box car, and is instantly decapitated. The moral of the story don''t lose your head over a piece of tail!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a rooster and an owl? A cock that stays up all night!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy in sitting in a bar hving a drink. All of a sudden an alien sits down next to him, licks its finger and sticks it in the guys ear. The guy''s a little annoyed, but doesn''t say anything. The next thing he knows, the alien does it again. this time the guy tells him to quit. Five minutes later, it happens again. This time he yells at him to stop. Ten minutes later, he finds a finger in his ear. Finally, he jumps up and screams, "If you don''t quit I''m gonna rip your balls off!". the alien thinks about it for a second, and does it again. The guy jumps up, pulls its pants down, but there was nothing there! In frustration he asks, "How do you screw?!" the alien smiles and sticks his finger in the guys ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The next time you are having a bad day, imagine this: You are a Siamese Twin. Your brother, attached at your shoulder is gay. You are not. He has a date coming over tonight. You only have one ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SPERM 1: Are we EVER going to reach the egg? SPERM 2: Stop moaning, we''ve only just passed the tonsils.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the differance between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The Taste...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man and a woman and they lived on a farm. They owned two horses, but they could not tell the difference between them! One day, the man painted a yellow stripe on the tail of one of the horses. When winter came, and the yellow had washed out from all the rain, the man and woman were left to stand there next to each other, staring at the horses. After two minutes of staring, the woman finally said, "I''ve got it! The black horse is taller than the white horse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the eyeglasses maker who moved his shop to an island off Alaska and is now known as an optical Aleutian?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer? A good lawyer knows the law; a great lawyer knows the judge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy is sitting in a bar with his friends bitching about going home to his wife. His friends ask him why he doesn''t want to go home to such a fine looking woman and he replies... "Well, the problem is that she has Gonnorrhea" So what say the friends, flip her over. "Well, she also has diarrhea" the guy says. "Yuck, but what about her mouth." The friends chime in. "Halitosis" the man says. "Damn, Why would you stay with her?" The friends say. "Well," the guy replies "She also has worms, and you guys know how I like to fish."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A truck driver picks up a woman hitch hiker on the side o the road. He pulls over on the side of the road a few blocks down and the woman asks him what he is doing? He asks her if she wants to have sex? She says "I can''t I''m on my period." He says "That doesn''t matter." So they get in the back of the cab and he is eating her out. A police officer drives by and sees the truck rocking. So he gets out and knocks on the door of the truck. The truck driver opens the door and asks if he can help the officer. The officer asks him what he is doing? He says licking his fingers "Eating Pizza!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four gay guys walk into a gay bar and they find a problem. There''s only one stool left. One guy says "Lets flip for it" But another says "No, Lets flip it over"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey. Pardon me, but you''ve obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn. I''d like to help you out. Which way did you come in? I''m busy now. Can I ignore you some other time? If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive. I don''t know what makes you so stupid, but it really works! Have you considered suing your brains for non-support? Don''t you need a license to be that ugly? I see the wheel is spinning, but the hamster looks dead. If you had another brain, it would be lonely.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two nuns were shopping in a food store and happened to be passing the beer and liquor section. One asks the other if she would like a beer. The nun answered, "That would be good, but I''d be uneasy about purchasing it." The 1st nun said she would handle it and picked up a six pack and took it to the cashier. The cashier had a surprised look on her face, so the nun said, "This is for washing our hair." Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under the counter and put a package of pretzel sticks in the bag with the beer saying, "Here, don''t forget the curlers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. With a little effort, you could pull the bags under your eyes over your head. 2. When the professor calls out your name during attendance, you rhythmically cry out "In da'' house!" 3. Your dirty laundry has become the closest thing to wall-to-wall carpeting. 4. Every study group you join gets fed up with your need to take a break for techno and grinding. 5. All your stories begin with, "I was so wasted..." 6. Your Native American name would''ve been "Man of Running Body Fluids." 7. You refer to sunlight as a "that bright shit." 8. You look forward to the weekdays as a time to relax. 9. Whenever you see a blinking "Do Not Walk" sign, you think how great it would look if you were on ecstasy. 10. All your stories end with, "...and that''s when everything got blurry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, Knock Who''s there? Cows go. Cows go who? No, silly! Cows go moo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two ants living in a girl''s pair of panties. One day they decide to go exploring in the caves. They said to meet back in the same spot in and hour. So, one ant went in one cave, and the other ant in a different cave. After an hour went by, the two ants met back up. One ant was covered in brown, sticky, smelly stuff. "Eeew!, What was your cave like" asked the other ant. "It was nice at first, but it soon became really smelly and the walls were all dark and sticky" replied the ant. "So how was your cave ?". "Well" he said, "It was lovely at first, all pink and warm, but then this bald guy started head butting me and then spitting on me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the hospital, a nurse is asking an old man what is his weight. The man is unsure about his weight so the nurse suggests that it is better if he check his weight now. He goes to the weighing scale and stands on it, then he goes back to the nurse. The nurse let him fill the form by himself. After he fills it, he gives it back to the nurse. When the nurse reads his weight, she is surprised that the man wrote, "82 kg - with glasses," there. The nurse asks the man, "Why must you write ''with glasses'' there? I only ask for your weight. Why don''t you write down your weight without the glasses?" "Because I can''t read the scales and write without my glasses," the man replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Welsh girl called Gwyneth visited Japan recently. There, people had problems pronouncing her name so she became Gwyniss. Everywhere she went, she was greeted with tremendous respect. At a farewell reception, her host said, "We''ve been so excited to have a famous author in our midst." "What am I supposed to have written?" she asked, baffled. "Why, The Gwyniss Book of Records."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In North England: ''mornin'' In West England : How ya doin'' In India : Get up you lazy chit. Don''t you need to go to work ?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy of 6 years old never pays attention to his pant''s zipper...which is always being left open. Because of this his mother often gets angry. One day some of his relatives plan to visit their city, so his mother advised him that whenever she tells him to "close the Eiffel Tower", it means that he has to close his zipper. His relatives arrive, and after some time, the boy asked his aunti, "Aunti, why did you come here?" His aunti answered, "Dear boy, we came here to see the Eiffel Tower." The boy said in great excitement, pointing towards his zipper, "But aunti, the Eiffel Tower is closed." Aunti replied, "My boy, that is the small Eiffel Tower. I came here to see big one." The boy answered politely, "Aunti, then I will have to call my dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your phone''s network is changing plan. The uglier you are the cheaper your calls. From now on all your calls will be free.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In several places on your tax forms, he''s written, "Give or take a million dollars." Tells you to put all your money into British cattle futures. You notice that his "calculator" is just a broken VCR remote. Insists that there''s no such number as four. He laughed at the Bob Dole background check. Counts family of squirrels living in your yard as dependents. Advises you to save postage by filing your taxes telepathically. Instead of C.P.A. license, he''s got a framed photo of a shirtless Alex Trebek. Demands that you call him the "Una-Countant." He''s got a 1040 Form tattooed on his arm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Number of physicians in the US = 700,000 Accidental deaths caused by physicians/year =120,000. Accidental deaths/physician = 0.171 Number of gun owners in US = 80,000,000 Number of accidental gun deaths/year = 1500 Accidental deaths/gun owner =.0000188 Conclusion - Doctors are approximately 9000 times more dangerous than gun owners!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a reporter for a suburban newspaper happened upon a construction site with a sign that ominously warned: "DANGER. RADIOACTIVE MATERIALS." Driven by the prospect of a hard-hitting expose, he made a quick call to his editor, then returned to the scene to investigate. The construction supervisor looked unhappy to see him; "I''ll tell you the truth," he said, "but I''m going to ask you not to publish what I say." "This is just like the movies," he thought. The supervisor continued, "There''s nothing radioactive on this site. That sign has been the only way to keep our lumber from being stolen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a teacher if you have an overwhelming urge to nod and say, "Now I understand why your kid is the way he/she is," after meeting the parents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the moron hitting his head against the wall? Because it felt so good when he stopped ! What do you call 12 morons at the bottom of a pool? An air pocket! Why did the moron drive his truck off the bridge? He wanted to check his airbrakes! How many morons does it take to screw in a light bulb? 3...one to hold the bulb, and 2 to turn the chair! Why did the moron open the refrigerator door? He wanted to see the salad dressing! How do you confuse a moron? Put him in a round room and tell him to sit in the corner!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are a bowling ball and a sorority girl alike? You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter and they''ll always come back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? Gucci sweats and Reeboks. And where was the location of the accident? Approximately milepost 498. And where is milepost 498? Probably between milepost 498 and 500. Did you blow your horn or anything? After the accident? Before the accident. Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it. Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing? Yes. Did the defendant say anything when she got out of the car? Yes, sir. What did she say? What disco am I at?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. I am the Lord thy God and thou shalt have not too many other Gods besides me. 2. Thou shalt make no graven images. This is a major religion, not a shop class. 3. Thou shalt not take the name of thy God in vain without the express written consent of thy God. The name "Thy God" is the sole property of thy God. Any use of the name of thy God without the express writtenconsent of thy God is unauthorized and illegal and shall be punished by thy God. 4. Remember the Sabbath, thy squash game and thy other appointments. 5. Honor thy single parent. 6. Thou shalt not kill a man just to watch him die. 7. Thou shalt not commit adultery and then run for office. 8. Thou shalt not steal. (Note: Not really applicable to car radios.) 9. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor when appearing before Judge Wapner. 10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor''s wife, his servants, his flocks, or his powertools.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking along the beach when he saw bottle. Curious, he picked it up and was wiping the sand off it when out came a genie. "I will grant you three wishes," said the genie. The man couldn''t believe it. "First, I want ten million dollars in a Swiss bank account." Poof! The genie handed the man a piece of paper with his account information on it. "Next, I want to be the smartest man in the world." Poof! The man instantly became smart. "Now, I want to be irresistible to women." Poof! The man was changed into a huge box of chocolates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Gates "Notes to self" * Next time my wife says to buy china, she means dishes. * When my son asks for a golf club for his birthday, he means a putter, not a golf course. * When my wife asks for diamonds, she wants ones that will fit on a necklace. * Don''t forget to tip the valet who pushes around your cart at the grocery store. * If someone offers you a drink, don''t ask when we''re eating dinner. * When my daughter asks for an iPod, don''t try to buy her the whole company.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The woman at the supermarket checkout was giving the clerk a hard time. As her audience in the waiting line increased, she became more abusive. Finally, the patient clerk came to a dog''s flea collar. The checker asked the customer if she was aware that the package had been opened. "Of course, I opened it," the woman snapped. "You can''t expect me to get it home and find out it''s the wrong size." A voice from the line spoke for all of us: "Wear it in good health."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the first day of school and I had gotten a serious scrape on my knee so I asked my friend Jesse to write down notes for me while I went to the nurse. Now, it was the first day of school and there were no notes written on our notebooks and neither of us had written our names on them, so when I came back the next and asked him to give me back my notebooks, he couldn''t tell which was mine and which was his, so we both decided that we''d take either one. Near the end of the school year Jesse got in trouble for stealing my notebook. After he got in trouble (with 3 days detention) I asked him why he stole my notebook. He showed me a small note on the back of what we had thought was his notebook that had been written on the back as a joke saying, "Don''t tell anyone, but this is my notebook," with a picture of me taped next to it. The date on the picture, August 8.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a fella in a fast-food outlet, and he''s just received his order of 7 hot-dogs, 9 Big Macs and 6 large Cokes. The counterhand says, "Would you like a tray?" The customer replies, "Steady on, haven''t I got enough to carry already?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are cannibals such great improvs? A: They keep feeding off each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many lead guitarists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. The guitarist holds the bulb and the world revolves around him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do blondes smile when lightning strikes? A: They think they''re getting their photo taken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother''s Day morning. As the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen, she lay in eager anticipation the lovely breakfast her helpful, caring children were making for her. However, after a good long wait, she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both sitting at the table eating bacon and eggs. "As a surprise for Mother''s Day," one explained, "we decided to cook our own breakfast."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction New Vaccine May Contain Rabies Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies Teacher Strikes Idle Kids Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again Iraqi Head Seeks Arms Farmer Bill Dies in House Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you are in darkness, then pray to God. If you are still in darkness, then go and pay your electricity bill......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if . . . you have been married three times and you still have the same in-laws, You think TACO BELL is a Mexican Phone Company, Your house still has the "WIDE LOAD" sign on the back, You think Possum is "The Other White Meat", You hooked up with your present girlfriend as a result of a message on the wall of the mens'' room at the Flying J Truck Stop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was eating breakfast one morning. He got to thinking about things, and asked, "Mommy, why does Daddy have so little hair on his head?" "He thinks a lot, dear," replied his mother, pleased with herself for coming up with a such good answer to her husband''s baldness. "Then why do you have so much hair?" asked Little Johnny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Get to the ledge of the plane. Then, you will do the following: 1.Squat 2.Pray 3.Leap 4.AHHHH! (It''s what you scream on the way down, isn''t it?) 5.Touchdown Yes sir, thats S...P...L...A...T In other words, SPLAT!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lorenzo Dow, an evangelist of the last century, was on a preaching tour when he came to a small town one cold winter''s night. He entered the local general store to get some warmth, and saw the town''s lawyers gathered around the pot-bellied stove, discussing the town''s business. Not one offered to allow Dow into the circle. Dow told the men who he was, and that he had recently had a vision where he had been given a tour of Hell, much like the traveler in Dante''s Inferno. When one of the lawyers asked him what he had seen, he replied, "Very much what I see here: All of the lawyers, gathered in the hottest place."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just when you are finally happy with your life and eveything going on in your life.... You get married and ruin it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, pal! Buddy, friend, mate, amigo! I''ve just heard that I won first prize in a competition! It''s a ten-day holiday for me and five others to Disney World! So I was wondering, if you''re not doing anything next Wednesday, if you could put my garbage can out for collection!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Of course I know what I''m doing! "Trust me." "Say, what happens if I press this?" "Stop being so negative!" "I''m perfectly fine. Really." "Do you smell something burning?" "It''s not that poisonous. Look, if I eat some first will you try it?" "See? Told you I wasn''t afraid of heights!" "You know, bears are really very social creatures. That one over there is smiling at me!" "I think this is what they said to do. At any rate, I guess we''ll see soon!" "No! Why would I need to read some silly instructions?" "Just wondering - what does skull and cross-bones mean? Did this bottle belong to pirates? It did taste kind of odd."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair. Copper is a brown-red color, correct? This is scientific evidence to back up blonde jokes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hopeless Romantic. Seeking: Filthy Whore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw this sign in a bar a few years ago. A camel can go eight days without a drink - but who the hell wants to be a camel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fool me once shame on you Fool me twice shame on me Fool me thrice you are not nice Fool me four times and I am gonna cap your sorry ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is black and red? An ape going down a hill!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You never know someone until you walk a mile in their shoes. But if you walked a mile in their shoes wouldn''t their feet get cold?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student was asked to list the 10 Commandments in any order. His answer? "3, 6, 1, 8, 4, 5, 9, 2, 10, 7".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the sixth day God turned to the Gabriel and said: "Today, I am going to create a land called Canada. It will be a land of outstanding natural beauty. It shall have tall, majestic mountains full of mountain goats and eagles. It will have beautiful sparkling lakes bountiful with bass and trout, forests full of elk and moose, high cliffs overlooking sandy beaches with an abundance of sea life, and rivers stocked with salmon." God continued, "I shall make the land rich in oil so as to make the inhabitants prosper, I shall call these inhabitants Canadians, and they shall be known as the most friendly people on the earth." "But Lord," asked Gabriel, "don''t you think you are being too generous to these Canadians?" "Not really," replied God, "just wait and see the neighbors I am going to give them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Know You Are in a Redneck Church When... People wonder, when Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish. Opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday. The choir group is known as the "OK Chorale". Four generations of the same family sit together in worship. Baptism is referred to as "branding". People think "rapture" is when you lift something too heavy. The final words of the benediction are, "Y''all come back now, yah hear?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you say "Give me liberty or give me death!" in French? A. I give up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris? A. Nobody knows. It''s never been tried.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? A. The French Army.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why was the Chunnel built under the English Channel? A. So the French government could to flee to London.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Did you hear about the new French tanks? A: They have 5 gears...4 in reverse, and one forward gear just in case they''re attacked from behind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why don''t they have fireworks at Euro Disney? A: Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do they have trees in Paris? A: So the Germans can march in the shade instead of the sun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why is good to be French? A: You can surrender at the beginning of the war, and US will win it for you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the first thing you are taught when joining the French army? A: To say "I surrender" in German', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Jesus not born in France? Because they couldn''t find three wise men or a virgin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about France''s new weapons contracts? They gave one to Ace Hardware to produce 250,000 wood sticks . . . They are still looking for a company to produce 250,000 little white flags.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where are the brave French soldiers buried? A: There aren''t any so they had to bury some of ours on their soil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Money is not everything. There''s Mastercard & Visa. One should love animals. They are so tasty. Save water. Shower with your girlfriend. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two. Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life. The wise never marry, and when they marry they become otherwise. Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives. Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop. Children in back seats cause accidents. Accidents in back seats cause children. The more you learn, the more you know. The more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know - so why bother to learn?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We''re here on the airport, where a group of people have just arrived after being stranded on an island for more than a year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This truly happened in an advanced oral English classroom: When the teacher asked the students: "What surprised you most in Tsinghua?" One of them answered, "Well, I''d heard that girls in Tsinghua were terribly ugly before I came here. However, when I arrived here myself, I was surprised to find there''s so many pretty girls, some of them are even sexy......" At that, all girls in the room smiled shyly. Then he continued, "But when the holiday was over, I found all of them had gone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two babies were born in the same hospital on the same day and ended up in adjacent basinettes in the nursery. Eighty-five years later, by coincidence, each of them is admitted to the same hospital with a "terminal" diagnosis, and they end up in the same two-bed semi-private room. And one of them rolls over and says to the other "So, what did you think?" Thanks to Steven Wright', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Twenty Something - The cost of a sitter for Saturday night. Fancy Restaurant - One that serves cold soup on purpose. College - The four-year period when parents are permitted access to their home telephone. Hors D''oeuvres - A sandwich cut into 20 pieces. Kissing - A means of getting two people so close together that they can''t see anything wrong with each other. Emergency Numbers - Police station, Fire Department and fast food places that deliver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was having trouble with his cat. His cat would always scratch the sofa but never the scratching post. One day the guy got an idea; he bought a new couch and replaced the scratching post with the old couch hoping this would solve his problem, but his cat just began scratching the new sofa. Then another idea hit him - he got some clay and got to work. Scratching post - $57 New sofa - $299 Clay - $9 Understanding your cat likes to scratch your face more than he likes to scratch the couch - priceless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man is driving in his car and hears police sirens behind him. The man knows that with his car he could never out-drive the cop, so, seeing the officer looks fat and out of shape, he opens his car door and makes a run for it. The chase goes on about 20 minutes, with the cop finally catching him. The cop, completely out of breath, tells the man that he will not bring him to the station on one condition - the man, wondering why the cop wasn''t going to turn him in, asked what the condition was. The cop said he wouldn''t turn him in if he would help him lose another 5 pounds!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, a woman received an unexpected call from a ticket clerk at a major airline. He read a list of names and asked if she knew any of the people. "Yes," she said, "they''re all friends of my son. How can I help you?" "The crew was cleaning a plane, and they found this address book," the clerk explained. "After seeing no identification, we looked through the entries and found one we knew could help us. It was under M for Mom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly... that when your mom dropped you off on the curb for school, she got fined for littering.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new intern at Heart & Cross Hospital was looking for an experienced doctor to sign off on him sending a patient to surgery. He saw a nicely tanned man giving orders to someone else so he walked up to him. "Could you sign this for me?" he asked. The man signed the sheet and the intern thanked him and walked away. The next day, the intern walked into the hospital and was informed by the security that he had been fired. The intern asked why, and the security guard told him that he had sent a patient to surgery without having a doctor sign off on it. "Yes, I did, I had him sign it," pointing to the man who he had sign the sheet and who was now mopping the floors. "Him?" asked the security guard. "That''s Jorge the nicely tanned head-janitor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blonde that was chopping at a tree near the neighbor''s house. Suddenly it fell over and hit the neighbor''s house. The neighbor came out and said, "You just crashed a tree on our house!" The blonde replied, "Well, since it''s an hour house, it''ll be gone in 60 minutes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend said, "Can I hang out with you?" I replied in a choking voice, "I have a spare noose in the closet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man named John was walking back to his house, when a stranger walked up to him and said, "I''ll give you tree beans if you give me your house." But John was drunk, so he thought he said, "If you give me tree beans, I''ll give you my house." So John said, "Yes." And while he was taking out some beans, the stranger gave him three beans and ran in his house. John hollered, "WAIT! YOU HAVE TO FEED THE DOGS OR THEY WILL ATTACK YOU CRAZILY!" But the stranger didn''t hear him fully and replied, "Oh. Don''t feed the dogs? O.k.!" The next day the stranger came out, all torn up and came to John and said, "I want my beans back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman who was driving down the highway pulled over to the side of the road when the policeman driving behind her turned on his lights and siren. She didn''t have her seat belt on so as soon as she stopped, she quietly slipped it on before the officer got to her window. After talking to her about speeding, the officer said, "I see you are wearing your seat belt. Do you believe in wearing it at all times?" "Yes, I do, officer," she politely replied. "Interesting," said the officer. "Do you always loop it through your steering wheel like that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 15-year-old boy discovered, having supressed it for years, that he was a homosexual. After gathering courage, he decided to tell his father. He entered the living room where his father sat, reading the newspaper. Reluctantly, he said, "Dad?..." His father looked up. "Yes, son?" "Dad...", the boy stopped for a second, "I''m... I''m gay." The boy looked at his father eagerly. To his surprise, he didn''t even flinch. "Alright, son," he said. "But let me ask you something. Do you participate in gay pride marches?" "No, but.." "Do you," his father interrupted him, "use words such as ''fabulous'' more than ten times a day?" "No..." "Do you shop for clothes more than twice a month and make sure that everynone notices?" the father continued. "No," said the son. "I don''t do any of that." "Well, get out of my sight, boy. You''re not gay. You''re just a fag."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hello, I am Mr. L, as most people call me. I am going to tell you a story that happened to me years ago. Here goes! People were pouring pollution all around they world; strangely, it made certain animals turn gigantic. That happened to a dog one day, it wasn''t pretty. I don''t know why, but it was chasing me around the city. Eventually, I gave up and let it do what it wanted to do to me. It came close to me, lifted its leg and... I think I know why I it did what it did. I was wearing a shirt with a fire hydrant on it, and all the other ones were broken. That''s my story.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once a bird pooped on me, so I threw it back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike and Joe, two buddies, were talking when Joe asked, "Hey Mike, do you have a rake?" "No," Mike replied. Joe questioned, "Well, then will ask your sister to come to my house this weekend to help with something?" Mike, even though he thought this was a strange request, consented, and later talked his sister into it. That weekend, Mike, overcome with curiosity, drove to Joe''s. Joe called out that he and Mike''s sister were in the back yard. After walking around, Mike saw Joe holding Mike''s sister updide down by her toes and pushing and pulling her through Joe''s flower garden. Obviously shocked, Mike yelled in surprise, "What the heck do you think you are doing?" Calmly Joe answered, "A gardening magazine said to use a rake to even out the soil. Neither of us had one, but they said I could also use a hoe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael Vick shouldn''t go to jail for dog fighting. "Why? It''s a crime." "Well, it''s one thing to fight your friends or someone at a bar, but it''s your dog. You should be able to fight him if he gets in your face." "What?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I started a new band called The Chimes "What kind of band?" "Acapella Ska" "What do you play?" "Drums"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were attacked by giant mutants, what would you do? Most people would run. Some would hide, and the video recorders would record it and put it on television. Last week, humans won a war against giant vicious demons called, "Razzoopis". Razzoopis are Godzilla-sized monsters that have rock hard bodies, and breath fire. No one knows why it came, or how it was defeated, but the other humans had a feeling that the humans gave back its baby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two businessmen were taking a break while setting up their soon-to-open store''s shelving units. There they sat, in the middle of nothing but empty shelves. One said, "I bet any minute now some smart aleck will stick his head in the door and ask what we''re selling." Within minutes, a man did just that, "Hey, boys, whacha sellin''?" One businessmen responded sarcastically, "We''re selling assholes." Without missing a beat, the man rejoined, "Looks like business is good; ya only got two left!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Kentucky Fried was on the side he was leaving from.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a quirky breed of dinosaur called an "Adoptosaurus". Adoptosauruses laid eggs and often times forgot where they laid them or whose eggs were who''s. Basically, they "adopted" the eggs they found and claimed them as their own. Adoptosauruses didn''t eat meat because it wasn''t apart of their dino-religion. They thought eating meat made dinosaurs fat and have wrinkly skin. Adoptosauruses ate flowers because they thought it made them smell good. They thought they were the best of all the dinosaurs. Maybe they went extinct so fast because their babies got hungry and ate each other, or the T-rexes found them and ate them, or maybe they were just stupid dinosaurs that adopted their own eggs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A T Rex named Farrell asked his mother if he could dress up in a tutu. His mother replied, "No! Boys don''t wear tutus and dance on their tippie-toes!" Farrell yelled, "But mom!" and told his father. His father said, "Son, I''m a balerina and I dance in a tutu." Then the mother fainted and fell on the floor. So father and son danced around the unconscious mother in tutus. They had so much fun, and later had cookies and tea as a treat - and they used the mother as a table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy named John was moving away somewhere far from his the home he is already in. But he couldn''t bring the loved kitten he found. So he decided to sneak it. He stuffed the cat in a cardboard box without any holes. Suddenly his mother came up. He quickly taped it shut and put it on the corner of his bed. "John, did I hear a cat meow?" "No mother." She left. So then John went "Whew!" and he sat on the opposite corner of the bed. It forced the box upwards and out the window. The cat popped out and had it hands up, like on a roller coaster, and the same with its feet. It stared right at John and made a quiet meow. It fell in the kiddie pool. John said, "Well no wonder they call it the Kitty pool!" His mom came in and said, "You can bring the cat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when two blonds fight? A Stupid Fight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the parasite cross the road? It hopped on the chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than roses on your piano?? Tulips on your organ! (two-lips)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Post rejected Braingle brain teasers here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once heard a cretin tell his friend that all cretins are liars! Did he lie though?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a gift for Christmas, a wealthy family gives its children seventeen computer games. The youngest child gets one ninth of the games, the middle child gets one third of the games and the oldest child gets one half of the games. How are the games divided up, remembering you cannot have part of a computer game? The family are a little stuck until they borrow a game from their neighbours. This allows: one ninth of 18 is 2, one third of 18 is 6 and one half of 18 is 9. Now, this adds to 2 + 6 + 9 = 17, leaving the spare game to give back to their neighbour!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer goes in to the cell where his client is being held. "Okay, I''ve some bad news, and some good news." "Right, what''s the bad news?" "It''s DEFINITELY your blood at the scene of the crime." "So what''s the good news?" "Your cholesterol is way down!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was working on circumferences for homework when his mother came in and said, "Do you want some pie?" The boy replied, "Sure." So the mother was saying "3.141592..." over and over and then said, "Want some ratio?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grandfather bought a hobby-horse by mail order as a Christmas present for his granddaughter. The toy arrived in 189 pieces. The instructions said that it could be put together in an hour; however, it took the old man two days to assemble the toy. Finally, when it was all put together, he wrote a check, cut it into 189 pieces and mailed it to the company.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Jimmy, use the word "handsome" in a sentence. Jimmy: Handsome gum over will ya? Teacher: No, no, that''s not right. You have one more chance. Use the word "gladiator" in a sentence. Jimmy: A monster ate my sister and I''m gladiator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy and his missus are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor''s dog barking. It had been barking for hours and hours. Suddenly, Paddy jumps out of bed and says, "I''ve had enough of this," and goes downstairs. Paddy finally comes back up to bed and his wife says, "The dog is still barking. What have you been doing?" Paddy says, "I''ve put their dog in our yard - now we''ll see how THEY like it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Hate you you hate me barney gave *****(1) H.I.V so we kicked them in the balls and shot her in the head now that *****(2) bitch is dead anii stars ***** men add someones nae or add an adjective to fit i.e - *****(1)fred *****(2)ugly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher stood at the front of the room. "Does anybody know what this Monday is?" About half of the students raised their hands. The teacher pointed to one of them. "It''s Columbus Day!" he crowed. The teacher smiled. "It is. Does anybody know why we celebrate it?" This time, only one student raised her hand. "It''s the day the Indians discovered Columbus!" How very true indeed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve heard about the new hair salon which opened up right across the street from the old established hair cutters'' place, haven''t you? They put up a big old sign, "WE GIVE SEVEN DOLLAR HAIR CUTS!" Not to be outdone, the old shop put out their own sign: "WE FIX SEVEN DOLLAR HAIR CUTS"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe in making the world safe for our children. But not our children''s children, because I don''t think children should be having sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man who was getting ready to be hanged by the politicians of Aaronztown City. The only way he could ignore death was to convince the mayor to make the politicians change their mind. So he did. "Hello Mayor Green, I am here to discuss important matter." "Okay. Very well. Do you want to make any comments before we begin?" "Yes. Do you mind if I examine the things around here before we begin?" "Yes." Darn. Okay, my first question. Do you mind if I do not get hung by the politicians?" "Yes." But, I have a family, a long life ahead of me, and lots of friends. Are you sure you mind?" Yes." The man growled furiously. "Do you mind if I don''t kill you before I get hung?" "Yes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do Hondas and Hyundais have standard rear-window defoggers? A: So your hands don''t get cold when you''re pushing them. Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a Porcupine? A: With a Porsche, the pricks are on the inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call people who use condoms? A: Parents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gregory was a boy who was always beaten up by a bully who everyone called: "The Demon". Everyday, "The Demon" would punch Gregory in the stomach without any warning. And Gregory always got a stomachache. Now, Gregory wasn''t very smart. He often confused things with other things and ended up in trouble. But Gregory didn''t know. And Gregory had 7-9 fears and takes them seriously. He has a fear of telling a teacher on someone, so that''s a reason why he''s letting The Demon punch him. The doctor told him that if he continued to be punched, that he would get a stomach bruise - which wasn''t good at all. So, Gregory and his father were having a father-to-son conversation about this problem. "Son, why are you letting ''The Demon'' punch you everyday?" "I dunno dad." "Well, you can''t just let him punch you in the stomach." "Really, dad?" "Yes, really." The next day, Gregory came home with stomach, and rib pains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fuck hubluza!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Wocka user has average joke comedy 2.5, but he doesn''t get the smiley. Why can it happen? Because his average joke comedy is between 2.495 and 2.5, which is rounded up to 2.5.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam Krypton was a boy who hated meatloaf, but he knew that every time he didn''t eat it, he lost a chance for ice cream, his favorite thing to eat. So today, he decided to eat it, and try and forget about the taste. He ate it up, and said, "THIS MEATLOAF WAS DELICIOUS!" His mother was pleased, and gave him ice cream. The next week, his mother gave him a large serving of meatloaf, expecting him to eat it all up. Sam forgot about what he did last week. He was looking out the window - then, a moment later, he said, "Eww! What smells?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newspaper columnist was found guilty and fined for calling a countess a cow. When the trial ended and the man paid his fine, he asked the judge, since it was now clear he couldn''t call a countess a cow, could he call a cow a countess? The judge said it was all right to do so. Whereupon the newspaperman turned to the countess in the courtroom, bowed elaborately, and said, "How do you do, Countess?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat that when she entered the elevator and pressed the ''up'' button, the elevator went down! "Oh yeah? Yo Momma is so fat that she can''t even fit in the elevator!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#1 At a Gift shop Counter ''"My One and only" Valentine cards, Is now available in Multi-packs!!'' #2 At a Washing Machine in a Washers ''When Finished, Please Remove Pants'' #3 At a Handdryer in a Toilet ''Warning: Please do not operate this machine with wet hands!'' #4 At a Highway beside a river ''Warning: Road closed due to flood if you don''t see this sign!'' #5 At a Repair Shop Sign at door: ''We repair anything!'' Sign at bell: ''Sorry, Bell broken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of weeks after hearing a sermon on Psalms 51:2-4 (knowing my own hidden secrets) and Psalm 52:3-4 (lies and deceit), a man wrote the following letter to the IRS: "I have been unable to sleep, knowing that I have cheated on my income tax. I understated my taxable income, and have enclosed a check for $150. If I still can''t sleep, I will send the rest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman, all talking about their teenage daughters. The Englishman said - "I walked into my daughter''s room and saw a razor on the floor. I didn''t know she was old enough to shave." The Irishman said - "That''s nothing; I walked into my daughter''s room and saw a tampax. I didn''t know she was old enough to start her periods." The Scottsman said - "Well, I walked into her room and saw a condom lying on the floor - I didn''t know she had grown a cock!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Giraffe Giraffe who? Giraffaggot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl was sat in science, when she wet herself. She goes to her teacher and says "I''ve wet myself". The teacher asks "Why didn''t you put your hand up?" She replies "I did, but it just ran down my hand!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so smelly that when she entered a pig sty, all the pigs had to evacuate...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... The idea for the Budweiser frogs came from listening to you and your friends trying to read the label on the bottle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You can remember every NASCAR driver and their car number but can''t remember how old your children are.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You are having marital problems because your wife never lets you win at arm wrestling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend Doug pointed up at a bird circling overhead and said, "Look, it''s an eagle!" "That doesn''t look like an eagle," I said. "Well of course not," he shot back amazingly quickly. "It''s travelling incognito. Haven''t you ever heard that "Eagles are Masters of De Skys?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you have every episode of Hee-Haw on tape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you carried a fishing pole into Sea World.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...a seven course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three primary colors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('... you have an above-ground pool and you fish in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you''ve ever had to have a wrecker pull your car out of a pothole in your driveway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just "misunderstood".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...your screen door has no screen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you cut the grass and find a Car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...if you refer to the fifth grade as, "your senior year".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You have ever had to get up quickly in the morning in order to let the goat out before she dropped raisins on the kitchen floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You think mud rasslin'' should be an Olympic sport.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... Your gene pool doesn''t have a "deep end."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You think the Gettysburg Address is where Lincoln lived.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... The lake has to be restocked after you take a bath.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You''re 42 and still have clowns come to your birthday party.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You can talk for more than 20 minutes on the difference between squirrel and rabbit stew.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandfather invented the rear-view mirror. Made millions - hasn''t looked back since!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you can touch it and you can see it, it''s REAL. If you can touch it but you can''t see it, it''s TRANSPARENT. If you can''t touch it but you can see it, it''s VIRTUAL. If you can''t touch it and you can''t see it, it''s GONE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, you! Pull over! shouted the traffic cop. The lady complied, and the judge next day fined her twenty-five dollars for speeding. She went home in great anxiety lest her husband, who always examined her checkbook, should learn of the incident. Then inspiration struck and she marked the check stub, "One pullover, $25."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blond put an advert in the library to start a marching band. 20 other blonds saw this advert and signed up. At their first destination they played "Oh, when the saints". At their second destination they played the same song. At their third destination they played the same song yet again! When they arrived at their fourth destination a member of the crowd butted in and kicked one of the drummers. The blond that started the group said, "Why did you do that?" The guy replied "Well, you''ve killed all of the people in the world because your band is rubbish but loud, so pretty much all the people are saints and they''re marching into heaven, so stop playing!" The blond replied "We were playing? I thought we were being serious about this band!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bubba listened to the preacher at the revival and when the preacher asked those with needs to come forward for prayer, Bubba got in line. When it was his turn, the preacher asked, "What do you want me to pray about?" Bubba said, "Pray for my hearing, preacher." The preacher put one hand over Bubba''s ear and his other hand on top of Bubba''s head and prayed a while. Then he removed his hands and asked, "Bubba, now how is your hearing?" Bubba answered, "I don''t know, preacher. It''s next Wednesday at the Baton Rouge courthouse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some useless inventions: 1) A waterproof teabag 2) A swimsuit store in the North Pole 3) Sugar free, fat free, taste free chocolate 4) A parachute that opens on impact 5) An ejector seat in a helicopter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like the internet; she''s worldwide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s 2nd grade teacher was quizzing them on the alphabet. "Johnny," she says, "what comes after ''O''?" Johnny says, "Yeah!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The relatives of the family''s rich dowager gathered for the reading of her will after her long-awaited death. "Being of sound mind," read the lawyer, "I spent every last cent before I died."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('News just in - the drummer tripped over the cymbals, and hit his head. The hospital spokesperson said, "He''ll be all right in a couple of days; he''s just suffering from percussion."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The university''s gymnasium hallway displayed basketball team pictures from the past forty years. In every photo, one player, sitting front row center, held a basketball identifying the year of the team: 94-95, 95-96, 96-97, 97-98, etc. One day, a senior on the basketball team noticed a cute, blonde freshman cheerleader staring curiously at the photos. The senior, hoping to score a few points off the court, commented about the team''s history. Impressed, the cute, blonde freshman cheerleader said: "Isn''t it amazing how the teams always won by just one point?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a couple was in their room and the woman had just performed amazing oral on her man. He asked her where she had learned how to do it like that. She than said to him, "It took some practice but your dad finally taught me how to do it right."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Person A: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person B: Is this a trick question?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Why are little children sweet-tooths? They keep crying when they can''t have candy. 2. Why are little children kindergarteners? Um... they''re still learning basic skills, are they not? 3. Why are little children such blanket-connected people? They have read too many Peanut strips and can''t resist but be Linus. 4. Why are little children people who like to joke around? They hear their dad''s joke with them too often.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign outside a watch-maker''s shop; Watch batteries fitted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign outside a Chinese restaurant: Try our curries, you''ll never get better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is taking an interview, and the examiner is asking some general questions. "What is the boiling temperature of water?" "I am not sure." "Miss, either you know it or you don''t know it." "No, I am still not sure." "The boiling temperature of water is 100 degrees!" "Ok, so it''s the right angle that boils at 90 degrees?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found this attached to a halloween scythe: BE SURE HEAD IS ATTACHED BEFORE USE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was driving along in her car one day, when she noticed a man at the side of the road, eating grass. She pulled over and asked him "Why are you eating the grass?" The man replied, "I''m too poor to afford any food, so I have to eat the grass to stay alive." The blonde said to him, "Don''t worry, you can come back to my house and I''ll give you food." The man, overjoyed, asked the blonde, "But why are you helping me?" She replied, "Well, I like cows." The man, who didn''t think he''d heard her properly, repeated the question. "Why do you want to help me?" She said "Because cows eat grass, so you must be a cow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not being rascist, this actually happened to me. I was driving my car late at night along a fairly busy road, when I came across a very busy junction. Coming towards me, on the wrong side of the road, with no lights on except for the left indicator, was an Asian lady in her 4x4. I stopped, and started to back up, and she stopped at the junction as well, and turned right down another road (with her left indicator still on), and also still on the wrong side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s green and runs round the garden? The hedge!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m very sorry sir, but I don''t have my homework with me- I left my bag on the bus. "Well done! A+"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear son, Good luck with your exams tomorrow. I always think that it''s best to stay up partying all of the night before an exam. Exam rooms are always a good place to catch up on sleep, because they''re silent, and there''s nothing to do in them anyway. Love, Dad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a new baby cousin named Caroline. She has a big brother named Sam (he just turned 2) and 2 big sisters named Elena and Erica. Well, my aunt was away with her three daughters. It was just my uncle and Sam at home. My uncle and Sam were playing on the floor. My uncle had to fart, but he tried to let it out quietly, but it came out a little louder than he had expected. Then Sam perks up and says "Baby Caroline?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat you can slap her ass all day and not slap the same place twice!.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DON''T CHEAT! Draw a pig. Yes, that''s right. On a blank piece of paper, draw a pig, then scroll down and read the interpretation of your pig! Draw your pig first! And don''t look at the next part until you are done! It won''t be fun if you look first. Now if you''re done...start to scroll down..... YOU''RE CHEATING! DRAW THE DAMN PIG!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We Haven''t Had Any A store manager overheard a clerk saying to a customer, "No, ma''am, we haven''t had any for some weeks now, and it doesn''t look as if we''ll be getting any soon." Alarmed, the manager rushed over to the customer who was walking out the door and said, "That isn''t true, ma''am. Of course, we''ll have some soon. In fact, we placed an order for it a couple of weeks ago." The manager then drew the clerk aside and growled, "Never, never, never, never say we don''t have something. If we don''t have it, say we ordered it and it''s on its way. "Now, what was it she wanted?" The clerk answered, "Snow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wouldn''t have believed this unless I seen it with my own eyes. I was walking down a street in the city I live in and noticed a store was going out of business. In the window was a huge sign "GOING OUT OF BUSINESS SALE", directly below that sign was another sign that said "NOW HIRING!" Talk about no job security!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know ''that look'' women get when they want sex? Me neither. ~ Steve Martin "Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don''t have a good partner, you''d better have a good hand." ~ Woody Allen "Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night." ~ Rodney Dangerfield "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place." ~ Billy Crystal "I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy." ~ Tom Clancy "Ah yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man''s genitals through his wallet." ~ Robin Williams "See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time." ~ Robin Williams', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who was the most complaining woman in the bible? Mary, because she got on Joseph''s ass and rode it all the way to Bethlehem.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some men will got to extraordinary lengths to prove how macho they are. Frenchman Pierre Pumpille recently shunted a stationary car two feet by headbutting it. "Women thought I was a god," he explained from his hospital bed. Deity or not, however, Pumpille is a veritable girl''s blouse compared to Polish farmer Krystof Azninski, who staked a strong claim to being Europe''s most macho man by cutting off his own head in 1995. Azninski, 30, had been drinking with friends when it was suggested they strip naked and play some "men''s games". Initially they hit each other over the head with frozen turnips, but then one man upped the ante by seizing a chainsaw and cutting off the end of his foot. Not to be outdone, Azninski grabbed the saw and, shouting "Watch this then," he swung at his own head and chopped it off. "It''s funny," said one companion, "when he was young he put on his sister''s underwear. But he died like a man."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican jail guard died from an excess of zeal while supervising an inmate''s conjugal visit. Raul Zarate Diaz was closely watching his charge from the roof of the prison when he tripped over an air vent, crashed through the skylight, and fell 23 feet to land beside the bed where the inmate and his wife were, against all odds, enjoying an intimate moment. The interrupted prisoner, offended by the intrusion, attempted to start a riot, but was squelched by prison security. Prisoners in the Tapachula facility reported that Diaz was in the habit of prowling the prison roof during conjugal visits, in search of prisoners to supervise. Local law enforcement reported that the guard was clutching a pornographic magazine, which was retained as evidence, and binoculars, whose sentimental value led to them being given back to the family of the deceased.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teenage guitarist got so carried away while bouncing up and down on his bed mimicking a rock star that he flew out of a third floor window to his death, a Singapore newspaper reported yesterday. The Straits Times said Li Xiao Meng, a 16-year-old from China who was studying at Singapore''s Hua Business School, was a keen musician who liked to jump up and down while playing his guitar in his hostel room. "But on November 17 he took things a bit too far," the newspaper said, reporting on a coroner''s court findings. Ruling death by misadventure, the court said evidence "points to the deceased unintentionally falling out of the window to his death when he was hyped up with exhilaration, jumping up and down on the bed placed against an open window while mimicking a rock guitarist"." Normally the windows were locked, the newspaper said, but students sometimes forced them open so they could smoke, something prohibited by the hostel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eric A. Barcia, a 22-year-old Reston, VA resident, was found dead yesterday after he used bungee cords to jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle, police said. The fast food worker taped a number of bungee cords together and strapped one end around his foot. Barcia had the foresight to anchor the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, and he even remembered to measure the length of the bungee cords to make sure that they were a few feet short of the 70 foot drop. He proceeded to fall headfirst from the trestle, and hit the pavement 70 feet below several seconds later. Fairfax County police said "The stretched length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do call a crying alien baby? An Unidentifyed Crying Object!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What part of music is the part you''d better not try to sing? Refrain!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a musician with real high morals? Virtuoso.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who composed the Unfinished Symphony? Sherbet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the principal singer of nineteenth century opera called? Pre-Madonna!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fill in the blank: The person who spends all of today bragging about what he is going to accomplish tomorrow probably did the very same thing _________. Yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? U P Broken up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? Weather Cast Cast Cast Cast Weather forecast!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does this represent? W A T E R Waterfall!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? A R M S Open arms!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Les chres lchrent les chairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CONGRATULATIONS! WHY? BECAUSE YOU ARE ONE OF THE VERY VERY VERY FEW WHO READ THE README FILE! But because the other, huge percentage do NOT, we moved the actual contents of this file into IGNOREME file because the chances for most of the people to read IGNOREME are at least the chances to read README (more than that, we believe they are really much higher). So now, go read IGNOREME with the actual contents what you would have expected here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do Chinese eat dogs? Yes. And cats. Especially on our "Thanks receiving" day. Besides, turkeys are our favorite pets. In China only the most uneducated eat turkeys. China is becoming strong. Does your government want to take over the world? Yes, absolutely. As soon as we become powerful, we will invade Iraq and Afghanistan. Why doesn''t your government give Tibet back to its monks? Because the monks want to help the Seminoles take back Florida. Are the products made in China very cheap? Yes. Were we using slaves, the price would be even cheaper. Why you are the only kid in your family? Because my parents don''t fuck with everybody. You have 1.4 billion people. Now what do you want to do with it? Find a new planet. Kill the native people there, and move in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Flood is over and the ark has landed. Noah lets all the animals out and says, "Go forth and multiply." A few months later, Noah decides to take a stroll and see how the animals are doing. Everywhere he looks he finds baby animals. Everyone is doing fine except for one pair of little snakes. "What''s the problem?" says Noah. "Cut down some trees and let us live there", say the snakes. Noah follows their advice. Several more weeks pass. Noah checks on the snakes again. Lots of little snakes, everybody is happy. Noah asks, "Want to tell me how the trees helped?" "Certainly", say the snakes. "We''re adders, so we need logs to multiply."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t glue stick to the bottle?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does a clean house indicate that there is a broken computer in it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that''s falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you never hear father-in-law jokes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first you don''t succeed, shouldn''t you try doing it like your wife/girlfriend told you to do it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And my FAVORITE...... The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends, if they''re okay, then it''s you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple, hosting a dinner party, were interrupted when the maid called the hostess to the kitchen. "Ma''am, the cat climbed up on the kitchen counter and ate the middle of the salmon." Light on her feet, the hostess told her to replace the missing portion with canned salmon, then returned to her guests. As everyone enjoyed the fish, the maid summoned the hostess into the kitchen again. "Ma''am, the cat is dead!" The frightened hostess felt obliged to inform her guests and suggested everyone go to the hospital together to get their stomachs pumped. Returning home after their long, expensive, and embarrassing ordeal, she asked the maid where she had put the cat. "Nowhere, Ma''am. It''s still out in the street where the car hit it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus is sitting down one day and is visioning the high rate of drug consumption on earth in later years. He thought it was a bit hypocritical of him to condemn them without first trying them himself, so he sent his apostles out to find what drugs they could. The secret operation is effected and two days later the commissioned Jesus, waiting at the door, hears a knock: "Who is it?" "It''s Paul" Jesus opens the door. "What did you bring Paul?" "Hashish from Morocco" another knock ... "Who is it?" "It''s Mark" Jesus opens the door. "What did you bring Mark?" "Marijuana from Colombia" another knock ... "Who is it?" "It''s Matthew" Jesus opens the door. "What did you bring Matthew ?" "Cocaine from Bolivia" This continues for a while until finally there''s a 12th knock on the door"Who is it?" "It''s Judas" Jesus opens the door. "What did you bring Judas?" "FBI!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey Sean, I''ve got a job lined up for you, can you turn up tomorrow, about tenish? "Tennish? I don''t even have a racket"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young Alabama man goes to a drug store and says to the pharmacist: "I got a hot date tonight, an'' I need me some pertection. How much is a pack a'' them thar rubbers gonna cost me?" The pharmacist responds: "A three-pack of condoms is $4.99 with tax." "TACKS!" the shocked redneck says. "Gawd a'' mighty, don''t they stay on by themselves?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just after Creation the Lord noticed that the original male-female pair of snakes were not reproducing. He summoned them and said, "I thought I told everyone to go forth and multiply?" The snakes replied, "Yes Lord, but we cannot." The Lord was annoyed and thundered, "and why not?" to which the snakes answered, "You see, Lord, you made us Adders." We could have stopped here (small groan), but actually the Lord got real sore and threatened, "I don''t give a shit, just go forth and multiply!" A week later when the Lord visited, Lo! - was he pleased. Adders here, adders there, adders everywhere. He called for the original pair. "Congratulations," he said, and then not without some bafflement inquired, "how did you do it?" The ingenious pair replied, "It was simple, Lord. We used logarithms." Alternative ending, "Fibonacci coached us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Susan () Vic () Vic: Finger the baby''s ass, if he kicks, he''ll be a sorcer, if he screams, he''ll be a singer, if he laughs, he''ll be a homo. Susan:()What about a girl? Vic: We finger them when they over 18. ...... ....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Let''s test your IQ............. 1. man ----------- board Ans. man overboard 2. stand ----------- i I understand ok?....get the drift? Let''s try a few now & see how you fare. 3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/ Reading between the lines 4. r road a d Crossroad 5. cycle cycle cycle Tricycle 6. t o w n Downtown 7. le / / vel Split level 8 . 0 ------------ M.D. Ph.D. Two degrees below zero 9. knee ------------ light Neon light (knee-on light) 10. ii ii ----------- O O Circles under the eyes 11. dice dice Paradise 12. t o u c h Touchdown 13. ground --------------- feet feet feet feet feet feet Six feet underground 14. he''s / himself He''s by himself 15. ecnalg Backward glance 16. death / life Life after death 17 THINK Think big! And the last one is fun............ 18 ababaaabbbbaaaabbbbababaabbaaabbbb.... Long time no ''c''(see)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a very long line that goes on and on and just when you think it is over it starts again going on and on but you know it cannot keep on forever until it starts repeating itself about being a very long line that goes on and on and just when you think it is over it starts repeating itself about not keeping going on and on forever but you know it was a very long line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young air force officer had a very beautiful wife. Early each morning he left his house and went to the airport, and an hour later his wife always left the house too, with a big white towel, and went for a walk on the beach. Her husband always flew over every morning, and when she saw his aeroplane, she held the white towel high above her head. When her husband saw it, he made either the left wing or the right wing of his aeroplane go down. The left wing meant, ''I will be busy tonight and won''t be home,'' the right wing meant, ''In eight hours I will be holding you in my arms.'' One morning he flew over with eight other aeroplanes, and his left wing went down. Before his wife had time to feel sad about this, all the other aeroplanes flew over, and each one of them turned its right wing down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 ladies were on a flight. Suddenly the pilot informed them that there was a technical problem and the plane was going to crash into the sea. A Chinese lady quickly took her cosmetics set out and started to doll herself up. A Malay lady beside her questioned her on her actions. The Chinese lady replied that if she looked beautiful, the guys coming to rescue survivors would usually save the pretty ladies first. On hearing this, the Malay lady started to put on all her jewellery. An Indian woman sitting beside the Malay lady was curious and questioned her. The Malay lady said that the rescuers would save her because she would easily be identified by the glitter of her jewels. The Indian woman then started taking her clothes off. Both the Chinese and Malay ladies were shocked and questioned her. The Indian woman then replied that rescue teams do not usually look for survivors. They usually look for the "Black Box" first!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The running water in Singapore can be drunk directly. So when I get thirsty, I go to the toilet and drink. But how to make a bowl of instant noodle? A girl thinks: "Since the running water can be drunk directly, the water from electric bathing machine also can!" So she use the water from bathing machine to make instant noodle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between man and life? Life is always hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: The weather here is too bad. The winter is too cold, and the summer is too hot. Fortunately, I have an air condition in my room. Oh, do you have air condition in your dorm? Students: (laughing) No way. Teacher: At least you can use a fan, can''t you? Students: (upset) No way! The electricity is cut off at 11 o''clock. Teacher: (puzzled) No air condition, no fan, six people in such a small room, and the weather is so hot, how can you sleep? Students: We don''t sleep. Teacher: (surprised) Oh, if you don''t sleep, how can you study? Students: We don''t study, either. Teacher: ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was late in the evening and I was studying in the university library''s reading room. It was in the middle of final exams, so the library was a hectic place with students milling around everywhere. I was sitting at my desk with my pile of books and felt the need for a nap before I continued with my work. I wasn''t asleep long before I was awakened by laughter. To my surprise, everyone who was laughing was also looking at me. I looked around the room, silently pleading for answers, when someone next to me leaned over and whispered, "You were farting in your sleep."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had been seeing David for a couple of months; he and I both had children from previous marriages. My daughter Amanda has a slight learning disability and is very outspoken. She just tells it like it is and if you don''t like it ... oh well. We were all at David''s house, sitting on the porch, talking about all the weird things our children do. Not to be outdone, Amanda says, "Oh, you say *we* are weird? Well, Mom, who chased me around the house the other night with her teeth out?" See, I had planned to tell David that I had false teeth, but I hadn''t gotten around to it yet. After I turned 40 shades of red, he looked at me and smiled. "Don''t worry," he said, "I still love you." Still, I felt really bad because he''d said the first thing he noticed about me was my beautiful smile!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gentleman came into work one day and he and I felt one of those instant and mutual attractions to one another. He gave me his card and told me to call him. Well, it just so happened that his card had his home address on it, so I thought I would just check out his place to scope out the merchandise, so to speak. Driving down his street, I slowed down to a near-crawl and hung my head out the window, looking for his house number. The house number proved to be irrelevant, though, when I looked up and saw him standing on his porch, waving at me! There I was with my head hanging out and my mouth wide open, looking like some kind of stalker! Needless to say, I did not wave back to him (I floored the gas pedal instead!) and I never called him. What would I have said?!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to a girl''s house for the first time and she shows him into the living room. She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to make them a few drinks. As he''s standing there alone, he notices a cute little vase on the mantel. He picks it up and as he''s looking at it, she walks back in. He says, "What''s this?" She says, "Oh, that. My father''s ashes are in there..." He turns beet red in embarrassment for having brought up such a tender subject and says, "Geez, oh, er...I..." She says, "Yeah, he''s too lazy to go to the kitchen to get an ashtray."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple preparing for a religious conversion meets with the orthodox rabbi for their final session. The rabbi asks if they have any final questions. The man asks, "Is it true that men and women don''t dance together?" "Yes," says the rabbi, "For modesty reasons, men and women dance separately." "So I can''t dance with my own wife?" "No." "Well, okay," says the man, "but what about sex?" "Fine," says the rabbi. "A mitzvah within the marriage!" "What about different positions?" the man asks. "No problem," says the rabbi. "Woman on top?" the man asks. "Why not?" replies the rabbi. "How about doggie-style?" "Of course!" "Well, what about standing up?" "NO!" says the rabbi, "It could lead to dancing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('* Perfume saleslady to customer: "Just a word of advice. Don''t put this stuff on if you''re not really serious about the guy." * Contrary to popular belief, used-car salesmen are fairly honest with their customers. It''s usually a condition of their parole. * A really great salesman is one who can actually make his wife feel sorry for the girl who lost her panties and bra in his car. * Only a salesman can make a customer think he is really absorbed by a customer''s needs and at the same time calculate how much of a commission he can make out of the deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman called an auto parts store and asked for a 28-ounce water pump. "What?" asked the confused parts guy. She said, "My husband says he needs a 28-ounce water pump." "A 28-ounce water pump? What kind of car does it fit?" asked the parts guy. "A Datsun," replied the woman. As the parts guy wrote down her request, a light went on in his head. "Oh, yes, ma''am. We''ve got 28-ounce water pumps," he said. "We also have 24-ounce and 26-ounce pumps." "Finally," she said. "You''re the first place I''ve called that knew what I was talking about." "Yes ma''am," said parts guy, smiling, as he jotted down "Datsun 280Z water pump..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiter, this lobster has only one claw. I''m sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight. Well, bring me the winner then.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiter, this plate is wet. That''s your soup, sir.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look here, waiter! How long must I wait for that half-duck I ordered? Until somebody orders the other half. We can''t go out and kill half a duck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Customer: I see you have gravy on your menu today. Waiter: Yes, sir. What would you like to have? Customer: A clean menu!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mother: Did you eat all the cookies. Tom? Tom: I didn''t touch one. Mother: That''s strange. There''s only one left. Tom: That''s the one I didn''t touch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife: One more word, and I will go back to my mother! Husband: Taxi!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My 12-year-old sister was filling out an application form for a foreign language course. Suddenly she stopped, a small frown on her forehead. A moment later, she wrote something down. Glancing over her shoulder, I saw that the question she had paused at was: "Mother tongue." On the blank space beside it she had written, "Pink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is zero a 1-digit number or a 0-digit number, or neither? You may think that 0 is a 1-digit number. However, this will make 00 a 2-digit number, 000 a 3-digit number, and so on. Leading zeros do not count towards the digits, and 0 itself is a leading zero. If you think that 0 is a 0-digit number, you''re still wrong. 100 is a 3-digit number, 10 is a 2-digit number, 1 is a 1-digit number, and therefore, .1 is a 0-digit number, .01 is a -1-digit number, and so on. Therefore, the number of digits of a real number x is 1+int(lgx). Since lg0 is meaningless, the number of digits of 0 can''t be defined.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does this represent? WRIST WRIST Tourists! (two wrists)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? DOG THE The underdog!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? SMOKE G Go up in smoke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? H I L L Downhill!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? TTTTTTTTTT Tent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? LINE = End of the Line!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('man having problems with premature ejaculation, went to the doctor to see what to do about it.doctor said try startling your self if you feel the urge to ejaculate.on the way home he buys a starter pistol. the guy excited to try the new idea, went home and was suprised to find his wife in the bed.after few minutes of fore play they were in the 69 position he was going to ejaculate so he fires the gun. his wife shits on his face bites 3 inchs off his dick and he still ejaculates prematurly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so short that you can see her feet on the driver license. Yo mama so ugly that when she was born the doctor slap her parents. Yo mama so dumb that she sat on the tv and watches her wheelchair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pat and Mick landed themselves a job at a saw mill. Just before morning tea Pat yelled: "Mick! I lost my finger!" "Have you now?" says Mick. "And how did you do it?" "I just touched this big spinning thing here like this...Damn! There goes another one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a mad scientist (a mad ...social... scientist) who kidnapped three colleagues, an engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician, and locked each of them in separate cells with plenty of canned food and water - but no can opener. A month later, returning, the mad scientist went to the engineer''s cell and found it long empty. The engineer had constructed a can opener from pocket trash, used aluminum shavings and dried sugar to make an explosive, and escaped. The physicist had worked out the angle necessary to knock the lids off the tin cans by throwing them against the wall. She was developing a good pitching arm and a new quantum theory. The mathematician had stacked the unopened cans into a surprising solution to the kissing problem; his dessicated corpse was propped calmly against a wall, and this was inscribed on the floor in blood: Theorem: If I can''t open these cans, I''ll die. Proof: assume the opposite...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Clinton had heard of all the starving people in Somalia, and wanted to get a look for himself. He ordered his aides to prepare Air Force One. On the plane, the president looked down with his binoculars, and said "My God! Look at them! Skinny, starving - where are our troops?" An aide chimed in: "Er, Mr. President... that''s not Somalia. It''s Arkansas."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama so hairy and fat, that when she went to a museum they yelled "the mammoth''s alive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama and daddy r so fat, half the world went to ur mom, the other to ur dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('wat do u call a female dog?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('did u have a pussy around ur head?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would like to take this opportunity to announce that I am the proud father of an 8 pound 7 ounce baby boy. Boy, is my wife gonna be mad when she finds out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seen on a bumper sticker: "IF CLINTON IS THE ANSWER, THEN IT MUST BE A STUPID QUESTION." Seen on another bumper sticker: "CLINTON HAPPENS."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a couple in Arkansas get married, move to Washington, then move back to Arkansas, are they still brother and sister?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Hillary are at a restaurant. The waiter tells them tonight''s special is chicken almondine and fresh fish. "The chicken sounds good; I''ll have that," Hillary says. The waiter nods. "And the vegetable?" he asks. "Oh, He''ll have a cheeseburger," Hillary replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Clinton called the White House interior decorator into the Oval Office. He was very furious and said, "Chelsea is very upset because she thinks she has the ugliest room in the entire White House; I want something done about it immediately!" Yes Sir, Mr. President," the interior decorator replies. "I''ll have those mirrors removed right away!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks his students to spell the word "before". The first kid tries: "B-E-F-O-H-R." "No", says the teacher, "that''s wrong!" Another kid: "B-E-E-F-O-R." "No, no," says the teacher. "Anybody else?" A little boy raises his hand: "B-E-F-O-R-E!" "Now, that''s right!" beams the teacher. "Now, Washington, use this word ''before'' in a sentence!" and the boy goes: "Two plus two BE FOUR!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kids are arguing over whose father is the biggest scaredy-cat. The first kid said, "My dad is so scared that, when lightning strikes, he hides underneath the bed." "Oh, yeah? That''s nothing," said the second kid. "My dad is so scared that, when my mom has to work the night shift, he goes next door to sleep with Mrs. Jones!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dogs... ...steal your food. ...eat all of your tennis balls. ...make you pick up their waste products. ...take all of your covers. ...eat out of the trash. ...beg. ...bark loudly at 1:00 in the morning. ...drink out of the toilet, while it still has poo in it. ...have accidents, on your floor. And you call you dog your BEST friend, I can''t imagine what your other friends do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Welshman, walking through a field, sees a man drinking water from a pool with his hands. He shouts, "Paid a yfed y dwr mae''r gwartheg yn cachi yn y dwr!" (Don''t drink the water, there''s cow shit in it!) The man shouts back, "I''m English, I don''t understand you!" The Welshman calls back, "Use both hands, you''ll get more in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Racing through the snow a onewarde southern sleigh, all the way we go bahing through the trees, the snow is turning red, I think i''m almost dead, all the children laugh and play around my stupid head!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three women are in a gym locker room dressing up to play racquetball, suddenly, a guy runs through the room wearing nothing but a bag over his head and passes the three women. He passes the first woman, who looks down at his penis. "He''s not my husband," she says. He passes by the second woman, who also looks down at his penis. "He''s not my husband either." She says, also not recognizing the unit. He passes by the third woman, who also looks down as he runs by her. "Wait a minute," she says. "He''s not even a member of this club."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is One Foot Enough??? A girl in the U.S. lived very far away from her mother. One day, the girl became engaged but discovered her fiance had only one foot. The girl, surprised sent her mother a letter asking for advice. The letter began, "Mother, my husband has only one foot..." The mother upon receiving the letter was confused on why that was a problem. She immediately wrote back to her daughter saying, "Dear, one foot is enough. your father has only 7 inches!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a man holding a magical lamp, he went to a bar where he then got a drink. The bartender sees him and asks him to chat, the man says,"I have a magical lamp rite here!" The bartender says," Wow, does this mean I can wish for a million bucks." The man goes, "Yes!" Bartender goes:" I wish for a million bucks!" POOF! The air is filled with 1 million ducks. The bartender outraged says," Hey you cheated me!" The man goes, "Hey it ain''t that easy!" *Sorry, Did my best', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde named Megan decides to go out for a ride in her new convertible. While she''s out driving she sees her best friend Christina, another blonde. She has a sign that reads "Vegas or Bust." "Why are you leaving?" asked Megan. "Some guy came up to me and told me to get out of town." "Come with me. We''ll go find the guy that said this and find out what''s up." Christina got in the car and they drove until Christina said she saw the guy who told her to leave town. As they approached him, he looked at Christina and said, "I remember you." She cowered behind Megan. "You forgot your flier." He handed her a flier that read "Get Outta Town! To Sunny Beach Resorts California!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A stockbroker is beginning his jail sentence for fraud, and meets his cell-mate for next seven years. He stares in shock at the weirdo next to him, when the psycopath says, "Don''t worry, I''m in here for a white-collar crime as well." The stockbroker is very relieved, and asks what crime the man had committed. The wild-haired, unkempt freak replies, "I killed a priest!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Velcro - what a rip-off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting married is very much like going to a continental restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that. A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don''t know, son, I''m still paying for it." Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn''t know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in most countries, son. Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late. A happy marriage is a matter of give and take; the husband gives and the wife takes. When a newly married man looks happy we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy - we wonder why.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Believe it or not, Windows95 is not a virus, as many (millions) have claimed. You want proof? Look no further! What''s the difference between Windows95 and a virus? Quality Replicates Quickly Virus: Yes Windows95: Yes Uses up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so Virus: Yes Windows95: Yes Occasional hard disk destruction Virus: Yes Windows95: Yes Usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems Virus: Yes Windows95:Yes Will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow and the user will buy new hardware Virus:Yes Windows95:Yes Occasional meltdown of vital components Virus:Yes Windows95:Yes Until now it seems Windows is a virus, but there are several fundamental differences. Viruses: 1.are well supported by their authors 2.are running on most systems 3.have fast, compact and efficient source code 4.become more sophisticated as they mature', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the "95" in Windows95 mean anyway? 10. The number of floppies it will ship in. 9. The percentage of users who will have to upgrade their hardware. 8. The number of megabytes of hard disk space required. 7. The number of pages in the "EASY INSTALL" version of the manual. 6. The percentage of existing programs that won''t run in the new OS. 5. The number of hours to install. 4. The number of calls to tech support before you can get it to run. 3. The number of people who will actually pay for the upgrade. 2. Meg of RAM required for the damn thing to run. 1. The year it was DUE to ship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dogs crawl under fences...Software crawls under Windows95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scanning for viruses...Windows95 found...Please delete.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Double your drive space...Delete Windows95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends don''t let friends use Windows95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first you don''t succeed...work for Microsoft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Turn your Pentium into a gameboy...Type "WIN" at the prompt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Windows95...the best $159 Solitaire game you can buy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Activate your own virus... type "WIN" at the prompt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife are walking down the High Street one evening, when the wife saw a beautiful diamond necklace in the jeweller''s shop window. "Oh," she exclaims, "I really would like that! Do you think you could get it for me?" With that, he looks around and finally locates a brick, which he promptly lobs through the window; he then grabs the necklace, and the two of them leg it. "Oh, there was a lovely pair of earrings to match in the other window!" she says. "What, do you think I''m MADE of bricks?" he exclaims.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best way to accelerate Windows is through one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It seems that a lawyer had a little bit too much to drink and on his way home rear-ended the car in front of him. The lawyer got out of his car, walked over to the driver of the other car and said, "Boy, are you in trouble! I''m a lawyer!" The driver looked out his window and said, "No, you''re in trouble. I''m a judge."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This house, said the real estate salesman, "has both its good points and its bad points. To show you I''m honest, I''m going to tell you about both. "The disadvantage is that there is a chemical plant one block south and a slaughterhouse a block north." "What is the advantage?" inquired the prospective buyer. "The advantage is that you can always tell which way the wind is blowing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The minister''s car wouldn''t start, so he called the garage. When the tow truck driver arrived, the minister says, "I hope you go easy on me. You know I''m only a poor preacher." "Yep," replied the tow truck driver, "I''ve heard you preach."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest wanted to go to the post office, so he asked a little boy the way. The boy took him to the post office. The priest said to the boy, "Thank you. Come to the church tomorrow and I will show you the way to Heaven." The boy turned and said, "But you don''t even know the way to the post office."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man having conversation with God, when his whole life flashed before his eyes as a series of footsteps on the sands of time. He saw that there were two pairs of footprints, but during the most difficult periods of his life there was only one set of footprints. He asked God, "You said you will be with me throughout this journey, but why have you deserted me during the most critical times of my life?" God replied, "Son, I did not desert you, I was always with you. You see only one set of footprints because, during those difficult times in your life, I was carrying you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five year old Becky answered the door when the census taker came by. She told the census taker that her daddy was a doctor and wasn''t home, because he was performing an appendectomy. "My," said the census taker, "that sure is a big word for such a little girl. Do you know what it means?" "Sure! Fifteen hundred bucks, and that doesn''t even include the anesthesiologist!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A six-year-old boy told his father he wanted to marry the little girl across the street. The father, being modern and well-schooled in handling children, hid his smile behind his hand. "That''s a serious step," he said. "Have you thought it out completely?" "Sure," his young son answered. "We can spend one week in my room and the next in hers. It''s right across the street, so I can run home if I get lonely in the night." "How about transportation? " the father asked. "I have my wagon, and we both have our tricycles," the little boy answered. The boy had an answer to every question the father raised. Finally, in exasperation, the man asked, "What about babies? When you''re married, you''re liable to have babies, you know." "We''ve thought about that, too," the little boy replied. "We''re not going to have babies. Every time she lays an egg, I''m going to step on it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To impress his date, the young man took her to a very chic Italian restaurant. After sipping some fine wine, he picked up the menu and studied it with an appraising eye. "We''ll have the Giuseppe Spomdalucci," he said finally. "Sorry, sir," said the waiter. "That''s the owner."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo'' momma so fat that you gotta be Clifford the Big Red Dog to hit it doggystyle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is rated ''E'' for everyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirate''s favorite food? Taco Bell''s cARRne asada.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the chicken say to the bully? Why don''t you peck on someone your own size?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Clinton returns from a vacation in Arkansas and walks down the steps of Air Force One with two pigs under his arms. At the bottom of the steps, the honor guardsman steps forward and remarks, "Nice pigs, Mr. President." Clinton replies, "I''ll have to let you know that these are genuine Arkansas Razor Back Hogs. I got this one for Chelsea and this one for Hillary. So, now what do you think?" The honor guardsman answers: "Nice trade, Sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the Institute of Incomplete Research, 7 out of 10 people are', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (' Prof. Tom will not meet his classes this afternoon. classesc l', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BASIC: Bill''''s Attempt to Seize Industry Control ISDN: It Still Does Nothing DOS: Defunct Operating System MACINTOSH: Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs WINDOWS: Will Install Needless Data On Whole System MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a bus staion named Ureliar (You-Really- Are), a man went to the station and waited for his train, he waited and a man came up to him and said,"Hey,my name is Emabuthed (I''m-A-Butt-Head), what''s the name of the station?" "Ureliar?" replied the man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When we are born, our mothers get the compliments and the flowers. When we get married, our brides get the presents and the publicity. When we die, our widows get the life insurance. What do women want to be liberated from?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A city slicker was driving through the country when he spotted a horse standing in a field. He was quite taken with the animal and so pulled over to ask the farmer if it was for sale. "Afraid not," said the farmer. "I''ll give you a thousand bucks!" said the city fella. "I can''t sell you that horse. He don''t look too good," replied the farmer. "I know horses, and he looks fine. I''ll give you two thousand!" "Well, all right, if you want him so bad." The next day, the man returned the horse, screaming that he had been gypped. "You sold me a blind horse!" "Well," said the farmer, "I told you he didn''t look too good."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man limped into a hospital to have his foot X-rayed, and was asked to wait for the results. Some time later an orderly appeared and handed the man a large pill. Just then a mother with a small child in need of immediate attention entered. After the orderly disappeared with the new patient, the man hobbled over to get a glass of water, swallow the pill, and sat down to wait. Some time later the orderly reappeared carrying a bucket of water. "Okay," he said, "Just drop the pill in this bucket and soak your foot for a while."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy couldn''t decide whether to go to Salt Lake City or Denver for vacation, so he called the airlines to get prices. "Airfare to Denver is $300," said a cheery salesperson. "And what about Salt Lake City?" "We have a really great rate to Salt Lake - $99.00, but there is a stopover." "Where?" "Denver."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went fishing one day. He looked over the side of his boat, and saw a snake with a frog in its mouth. Feeling sorry for the frog, he reached down, gently took the frog from the snake, and set the frog free - but then he felt sorry for the snake. He looked around the boat, but he had no food. All he had was a bottle of bourbon, so he opened the bottle and gave the snake a few shots. The snake went off happy, the frog was happy, and the man was happy to have performed such good deeds. He thought everything was great until about ten minutes passed and he heard something knock against the side of the boat. With stunned disbelief, the fisherman looked down and saw the snake was back with two frogs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you''re right, no one remembers. When you''re wrong, no one forgets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway, and after a fruitless search, he told his mother the lens was nowhere to be found. Undaunted, she went outside and in a few minutes returned with the lens in her hand. "How did you manage to find it, Mom?" the teenager asked. "We weren''t looking for the same thing," she replied. "You were looking for a small piece of plastic; I was looking for $150."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl and a little boy were at day care. The girl approaches the boy and says, "Hey Tommy, wanna play house?" He says, "Sure! What do you want me to do?" The girl replies, "I want you to communicate your thoughts." "Communicate my thoughts?" said a bewildered Tommy. "I have no idea what you mean." The little girl smirks and says, "Perfect. You can be the husband."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Christian missionary was making his first visit to a tribe in Borneo. The missionary asked the chief, "Do you people know anything about religion?" After a pause, the chief answered, "We got a little taste of it when the last missionary was here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s invisible and very frightened? A ghost with the sheet scared out of him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy Bob caught his friend Bubba searching high and low all around his living room. Billy Bob said, "What are you searching for?" Bubba replies, "Hidden cameras!" "And what makes you think that there are hidden cameras here?" says Billy Bob. Bubba said, "That guy on TV knows exactly what I am doing. Why, every few minutes he says, ''You are watching MTV!'' How does he know that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two lawyers had been life long friends: they were partners and shared everything, including their hot-blooded secretary. One day the secretary announced she was pregnant. They told her not to worry and assured her that they would pay all medical costs and would act as co-fathers when the child was born and provide all expenses thereafter. The day of delivery arrived, and both the lawyers were at the hospital pacing the floor in the waiting room. Finally one of them said, "I can''t take this, I''m going down to sit in my car and wait there. Please come down and tell me as soon as the child is born!" The partner agreed to do that. About an hour later the partner approached the car with a very grave look on his face. "What happened?" asked the waiting car occupant. The other partner announced, "They were twins and mine died!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Each day when I would come home from work I would drop to my knees and ask my 4-year-old son if he wanted to box. I wanted him to learn how to protect himself, so we would spar around for a few minutes before supper. One day my wife and I took our son to get new shoes. The shoe salesman was friendly and allowed my son to try on several pairs of shoes before we decided on a particular pair that he liked. We asked if he wanted to wear them home and he replied, "Yes." The salesman, who was kneeling on the floor in front of our son, held the old shoes in his hands and asked, "Do you want a box?" Our son stood up and punched him right on the nose. After grabbing our son we had to spend the next several minutes explaining why this happened. Luckily, our salesman was the father of a 4-year-old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, Jane asked the detective she had hired. "Did you trail my husband?" "Yes, ma''am, I did. I followed him to a bar, to an out-of-the-way restaurant and then to an apartment." A big smile crossed Jane''s face. "Aha! I''ve got him!" she said gloating, "Is there any doubt what he was doing?" "No ma''am," replied the sleuth, "It''s pretty clear that he was following you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Each evening bird lover Tom stood in his backyard, hooting like an owl - and one night, an owl called back to him. For a year, the man and his feathered friend hooted back and forth, with Tom even keeping a log of the "conversation." Just as Tom thought he was on the verge of a breakthrough in inter-species communication, his wife had a chat with next-door neighbour''s wife. "My husband spends his nights . . . calling out to owls," said Mrs. Rowe. "That''s odd," Mrs. Hollis replied. "So does my John." Then it dawned on them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teenage girl had just been given family-car privileges, when she returned home very late from a party. The next morning her father went out to the driveway to get the newspaper and came back into the house frowning. At 11:30am the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen, and her father asked her, "What time did you get in last night?" "Not too late, Dad," she replied nervously. Dead-pan, her father said, "Then I''ll have to talk with the paperboy about putting my paper under the front wheel of the car."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, early in the morning, a naked man was lying on a beach reading the newspaper. He saw a little girl skipping towards him. Quickly he covered himself with the newspaper just as the little girl spotted him. She comes by him and says,"Good morning, What''s under the newspaper?" The man replied,"A birdie!" The little girl started dancing and said,"Can I see it." The man Quickly snaps,"NO! It''s sleeping." The little girl skips away ad the man falls asleep. After a few hours he wakes up and notices he''s in the hospital. He calls over the doctor and asks why he was in the hospital. The doctor replies,"Ask that little girl." The little girl shyly goes over and says,"I was playing with the birdie, it spit on me, so i broke its neck, cracked its eggs and sets it nest on fire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother has a "lead foot," so I was not surprised when a state trooper pulled us over as we were speeding through Georgia. Hoping to get off with a warning, Mom tried to appear shocked when the trooper walked up to the car. "I have never been stopped like this before," she said to the officer. "What do they usually do, ma''am?" he asked, "shoot the tires out?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man and old woman had been married for about 52 years when one day the old woman died. The entire family showed up to the funeral. Every day after the funeral the old man would show up at the grave with his dog and spend a few minutes there. About two months later, a priest saw the old man there with his dog and decided to go talk to the old man. "Hello there. You know, we see you come out here every day to visit your wife''s grave and we just think that so sweet. We were all wondering if the dog is something that was special to your wife since you always bring it out here with you." "No, actually I bring the dog out here to pee on the grave. I''d do it myself, but I''d get arrested for indecent exposure!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For the first time in many years, an old man traveled from his rural town to the city to attend a movie. After buying his ticket, he stopped at the concession stand to purchase some popcorn. Handing the attendant $1.50, he couldn''t help but comment, "The last time I came to the movies, popcorn was only 15 cents." "Well, sir," the attendant replied with a grin, "you''re really going to enjoy yourself - we have sound now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One beautiful December evening Pedro and his girlfriend Rosita were sitting on a bench by the side of the ocean. It was a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey, Mamacita, let''s do Weeweechu." "Oh, no, not now, let''s look at the moon!" said Rosita. "Oh, c''mon baby, let''s you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it''s the perfect time," Pedro begged. "But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon," replied Rosita. "Please, corazoncita, just once, do Weeweechu with me." Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK, one time, we''ll do Weeweechu." Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang ..... "Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Jear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are young and beautiful, have 2 university degrees, and are fluent in 3 languages. You have long blonde hair, long legs and a killer smile and you want to earn a salary no less than 100 000$ per year. That''s nice. But we need a plumber.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Almost two hours into the Clemens and McNamee hearing, some interesting quotes can be found. (Credits to Yahoo! Sports, and ''Duk) "Mr. Clemens bled through his designer pants." "Mr. Clemens, do you recall any bleeding through your pants in 2001?" "Those little band-aids for his butt, if it bled." "Mr. Clemens, according to your account, Mr. McNamee injected your wife in your bedroom without your knowledge." "That said there was a palpable mass on the right buttock of Mr. Clemens. On another record, it also noticed a similar mass on the left buttock." "That was a hurried instance when we were in the closet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winters are fierce in northern Scotland, so the owner of the estate felt he was doing a good deed when he bought a pair of earmuffs for his foreman. One cold, blustery day, he noticed that the foreman wasn''t wearing them. In fact, he couldn''t recall a time he''d ever seen the man wear the earmuffs. Walking up to his foreman, he asked, "Didn''t you like the earmuffs I gave you?" "Oh, they were a thing of beauty and kept my ears nice and toasty warm!" "Then why aren''t you wearing them?" "Well, I did wear them that first cold day, but then someone offered me a drink and I didn''t hear him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new bride told her husband she was concerned that their honeymoon suite in the Watergate Hotel in Washington, D.C., might still be bugged from the Watergate scandal days. The groom agreed to check it out. He looked behind the drapes, he looked behind the pictures, he looked behind the mirrors, he looked under the rug and... "HEY!" he shouted. Under the rug was a small plate with four screws! He unscrewed the screws with his knife and threw them and the plate out the window. "There, that takes care of any bugs," he reassured his new bride. And the couple quickly jumped in bed and did what newlyweds do. The next morning, the hotel manager knocked on their door and asked the couple, "Was your stay satisfactory? How was the service? Did you enjoy your room?" The groom said, "Fine. Why do you ask?" The manager said, "Because, last night, the couple in the room under yours had their chandelier fall on them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family was traveling across country, and were on their first stop for gas. Getting out to stretch their legs, they walked into the gas station and began to look at the various items that were placed around them. The son goes over to a rack of books, and picks up one and laughs. "''Cooking With Mormons.'' We should definitely get this one," he sarcastically stated. The father grabbed it from his hands and stared at it for a minute, then said, "Maybe it''ll tell us how to cook them right." The son looked confused and said blankly "Who?" "The Mormons, of course," was his reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? 1. No, 2, no, 4, no, 8, no, 16, 32, 64, 128 . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many movie stars does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but he takes one step up the ladder and then his stunt double takes over!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BLONDE #1: I found some jokes about us blondes online. They''re inaccurate! They make us look- BLONDE #2:Ugly? BLONDE #3:Fat? BLONDE #4:Lazy? BLONDE #5:Mean? BLONDE #1:No, stupidly funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple was having a conversation, and the wife asked her husband a simple question :- "Boxers or briefs?" Her husband replied :- "Depends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three kids were walking on a beach looking for shells when one of them finds a magic lamp. They rub it, and the genie that comes out said that each could fall into a pit of whatever they desired. The first guy said "Money and treasure" and then he was poofed into a pit of money and treasure. The second guy said "Pleasure, happiness, and electronics" and then he was poofed into a pit of pleasure, happiness, and electonics. Then the third guy (who was stupid and swore/cussed a lot) said "Ah CRAP!!! Those were my ideas!" and then he was poofed intoa pile of crap (or faeces, or poop, whichever you prefer calling it!)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('California Version The latest telephone poll taken by the California Governor''s office asked whether people who live in California think illegal immigration is a serious problem: 29% of respondents answered: "Yes, it is a serious problem." 71% of respondents answered: "No es un problema serio."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2. Australia Version A recent survey in Australia asked the following question: Are there too many foreigners in this country now? Answer: 18% said: YES 82% said: ! ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day at Lee Elementary in the 1st grade hallway a little boy named Chris(kid #2 from my spoiled brat joke) and another child name sarah are walking down the hall way. (sarah and chris bump into each other) sarah:watch it doo doo head. chris:you watch it cootie pants. sarah:who are you calling cootie pants,freckle face. chris:you,little miss bucktooth. sarah:well you''re nothing but a ugly butt. chris:why don''t you shut the hell up you god damn mother fucking bitch ass whore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, he eats for a lifetime. Give a man a fire, he''s warm for a day. Set a man on fire, he''s warm for the rest of his life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Greeks Do Business CON talks to his son George. CON (father): "I want you to marry a girl of my choice." GEORGE (son): "I will choose my own bride!" CON (father): "But the girl is Bill Gates'' daughter.." GEORGE (son): "Well, in that case... okay." Next CON approaches Bill Gates. CON (father): "I have a husband for your daughter.... " Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!" CON (father): "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank." Bill Gates: "Ah! In that case... okay." Finally, CON goes to see the president of the World Bank. CON: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president." President: "But I already have more vice-presidents than I need!" CON: "But this young man is Bill Gates'' son-in-law." President: "Ah, in that case... okay." And that is how Greeks do business.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my girl-friend what she would like for her birthday, and she said she would like a green jumper. So I bought her a frog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many of you may be too young to remember U.S. comedian Sam Levenson; he was popular from the 1940s through the mid-1960s. Levenson said things that made sense and it would be a shame if they faded into oblivion, so here are a few of his "nuggets" worth assaying. 1. The first screw to get loose in your head is the one that holds your tongue in place. 2. You''re only young once. After that it takes some other excuse for behaving like an idiot. 3. Even if the majority agrees on an idiotic idea, it is still an idiotic idea. 4. There are more important things in life than money. The trouble is they all cost money. 5. On sex education in schools: Let them teach it! If the schools teach sex the way they teach everything else, the kids will lose interest anyhow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The judge read the charges, then asked: "Are you the defendant in this case?" "No, your honor," replied Tommy. "I''ve got a lawyer to do the defending. I''m the person who did it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were some kids playing hopscotch and they were allowed to skip so when the winner was on 8 it went straight to 10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('once a women was in her home and she heard someone go knock-knock. she said, who''s their and the voice said tisha the women said tisha who the voice said tisha me my abcs and she was like is that a ghost. the voice said, i''m your cousin and it was a knock-knock joke. oh the woman said', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a President who had a law that evryone had to laugh once a hour or they spent an hour in jail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her husband go to buy her new clothes. First, they decide she needs a new shirt, so they go through a few shirts but she rejects them all. Finally she points at one that she likes, but he thinks it is ugly, so he says no. They go through almost the whole store, and she says no to all of the shirts. Bored and annoyed, the husband finally goes up to the shirt she likes and generously "Fine, do you want this polo shirt?" The wife thinks for a few seconds and says "Oh, it''s Apollo shirt? In that case no, I''m really not into mythology."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give me food and I will live. Give me water and I will die. What or who am I? (Scroll down) A fire', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Policeman to woman he''s just stopped for speeding - "As soon as I saw you coming round the corner, I said to myself, ''Must be 55 at least''." "It''s this dress, officer - it always make me look older!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an intelligent, good looking and sensitive man? A rumour', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The attractive man I met last night insists he just wants to be friends, the girl told her Aunt. "Now I know what to do with a lover, but what the heck do I do with a ''friend''?" The wise old lady smiled and said, "The same as with your lover, dearie, only not quite so often."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are racing down a bumpy back road in a car down to a bank they''re going to rob. "Drive slower" pleads the blonde in the passenger seat, "I don''t want all the nitro in the boot to explode." "Relax," the driver replies, "even if it did, I''ve got a spare box under the seat . . . "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I''ll waste no time in reading it. - Moses Hadas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Soccer Coach: Why didn''t you stop the ball? New Goalie: I thought that was what the net was for!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brad: I have to take three courses in college; French, Spanish, and algebra Chris: Okay, let me hear you say hi in algebra.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Larry: Yo momma so old her birth certificate said expired! Jerry: You know, at least I have a mom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brad: Chad, how does Sherlock Holmes sneeze? Chad: A clue ! A clue!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Justin if I had ten tennis balls in one hand, and twelve in another what would I have? Justin: Huge hands sir', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so ugly she made a blind person cry!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The oldest Yo Momma joke in the book: Yo momma so fat that she''s fat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Jackie, please use the word "climate" in a sentence please. Jackie: Sure, I have a cherry tree in my backyard, but my parents won''t let me "climate" Teacher: That''s correct! Teacher: Now, Luis use the word "arrest" in a sentence. Luis: Sure, after running a mile I need "arrest"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve got good news and bad news. The good news is that there is no bad news. The bad news is that there is no good news.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat when she peed in China, she made the Yellow River!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Because Lexus created the park it your self car many Mexicans lost their jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde girl comes into her dad''s room and tells her dad... Amanda: Dad, I''m glad you named me Amanda. Dad: Why? Amanda: It''s because that''s what everyone calls me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ryan: Hey Philip, what''s that on your leg? Philip: A shoe! Ryan: Gesundheit! Philip: No, you idiot, a shoe! Ryan: No need to thank me, gesundheit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and sits down next to a beautiful blonde. "I just got this amazing watch," he tells her, "it can reads alpha waves, and can tell me what a person is thinking." "What does it say about me?" asked the blonde. "It says you want to sleep with me," said the man. "Sorry," said the blonde, "I think your watch is broken." "Hmmm," said the man, slowly examining the watch, "It seems to be running an hour fast..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dog goes up to a man with a pizza and starts whining for some. Man to Owner: Can I throw him a bit? Owner smiles proudly: Yes. The man picks up the dog and throws him on the ground.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Larry: Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great Fall? Mary: Because he had a bad summer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom: Jimmy, did you pick up your room yet? JImmy: No mom, it''s too heavy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond finished his English exam and came out. His friends asked him how did he do in his exam; he replied, "Exam was okay, but for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought, thought ... and at last I wrote THUNK!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: What is 5 plus 4? Blonde: 9 Teacher: What is 4 plus 5? Blonde: Are you trying to fool me, you''ve just twisted the figure. The answer is 6!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would you like to have; fruit juice, Soda, Tea, Chocolate, Milo, or coffee? "Tea, please." "Ceylon tea, Herbal tea, Bush tea, Honey bush tea, Ice tea or green tea?" "Ceylon tea." "How would you like it? Black or white?" "White." "Milk, Whitener, or Condensed milk?" "With milk, please." "Goat milk, Camel milk or cow milk?" "With cow milk, please." "Milk from Friesland cow or African cow?" "Um, I''ll take it black." "Would you like it with sweetener, sugar or honey?" "With sugar, please." "Beet sugar or cane sugar?" "Cane sugar, please." "White, brown or yellow sugar?" "Forget about tea, just give me a glass of water instead." "Mineral water or still water?" "Mineral water, please." "Flavored or non-flavored?" "I''d rather die of thirst!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some Wocka jokes have been picked by the system as the "joke of the day". However, how can you know which day the joke was picked? Searching does not work, and it will be very tiring to browse page after page. Look at its comments and see in which day it received lots of comments!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many moves, at least, are required to stalemate in chess? Nineteen moves. 1.h4 h5 2.c4 a5 3.Qa4 Ra6 4.Qxa5 Rah6 5.Qxc7 f6 6.Qxd7+ Kf7 7.Qxb7 Qd3 8.Qxb8 Qh7 9.Qxc8 Kg6 10.Qe6', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many moves, at least, are required to checkmate in chess? Four moves. 1.f4 e5 2.g4 Qh4#', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many diagonals does an N-polygon have? N(N-3)/2.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is just about to break a record. Suddenly, a dog jump up and bites him on the neck. Q: Is the dog owned by the former record keeper? A: Yes. Q: Did the former record keeper intend this to stop other people from breaking his record? A: Yes. The murderer doesn''t want other people to break his record. Therefore, he has trained his dog, so that when the dog hears someone speaking the last digits of pi that the murderer can recite, it will bite him to death.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is 60 divided by 1/3rd? Read carefully. If you think it''s 180, then you''re wrong! The answer is 20. 3rd is 1/3. 1/3rd is 1/(1/3), and therefore 3. 60 divided by 3 is 20.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The median of the list n; n+3, n+4; n+5; n+6; n+8; n+10; n+12; n+15 is 10. What is the mean? What is the median and what is the mean? There are 9 numbers, and the median is the 5th number n+6. Compare each number with the median, the mean is 10+(-6-3-2-1+2+4+6+9)/9=11.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('20 = best score in lowball bowling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('162 = worst score in golf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('72 = best score in golf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the school the biology teacher asks the class a question. "Where is an elephant''s sex organ?" Little Johnny, "In his feet ma''am." Teacher, "How come?" "If he steps on you, you''re fucked."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s father asked him, "Do you know about the birds and the bees?" "I don''t want to know!" little Johnny said, bursting into tears. Confused, the father asked little Johnny what was wrong. "Oh dad," Little Johnny sobbed, "At age six I got the ''there''s no Santa'' speech. At age seven I got the ''there''s no Easter bunny'' speech. Then at age 8 you hit me with the ''there''s no tooth fairy'' speech! If you''re going to tell me now that grown-ups don''t really fuck, I''ve got nothing left to live for!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The government has recently issued a statement saying that 18.9 percent of all statistics are false.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aron: Throw all of your fish in the air. Jake: Why? Aron: So I can tell my mom I honestly caught them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cinfuscious says : It is nice to meet a woman in the park but is better to park meat in a woman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: Doctor, doctor, I know a person who is an owl. Doctor: Who? Patient: Now I know two. Doctor: "Did you take the patient''s temperature?" Nurse: "No. Is it missing?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sean: I''ve finally cleared my mind! Dean: Does your new one work?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a sportswear shop, and when a pretty blonde assistant asks him what he wants, he goes red in the face and stammers, "A packet of condoms, please." The assistant says, "This is a sportswear shop, we don''t sell condoms!" and the man leaves. Two days later, he''s back. "A packet of condoms, please." "I''ve told you before, we don''t sell condoms!" and again, he gets all flustered and leaves hurriedly. Three days later, and he enters the shop again. This time, the manager is ready for him, and goes up to him, saying, "We do NOT sell condoms!" He blusters, and eventually admits, "Actually, I''m after a Dallas Cowboys shirt, but I was just too embarrassed to ask for one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s round and hard and sticks so far out of a man''s pajamas you can hang a hat on it? His head!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a wedding, the D.J. polled the guests to see who had been married the longest. The winners were then asked, "What advice do you have for the newlyweds?" The wife quickly responded, "The three most important words in a marriage are ''You''re probably right''." Everyone then looked at the husband. He said, "Yeah, she''s probably right!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day I live with fear, but occasionally I leave her and go drag racing. "I like to snatch kisses and vice versa." Seen on an attractive and busty brunette: "Size DOES matter!" Seen on a different attractive and busty brunette: "We could mate ...(picture of black widow spider) ... but then I''d have to kill you." Seen on a very overweight guy in a parking lot: "I beat anorexia." "Goal Of A Bitch: To dominate, control and destroy a man''s finances, mental health, self-esteem and any hope for happiness." Seen being worn by one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four friends are at a bar one night when they spy a gorgeous woman sitting down at a table. They know they can''t all have her so they decide to take turns trying to get the girl. The first friend walks up to the woman and says "Is it hot in here or is it just you"? The woman replies by turning away and the man plods back sadly to his friends. The second friend sits down next to her and very romantically states "heaven must be missing an angel". The lady tells him to leave so he goes back to sit with his friends. The third friend orders her a drink and sits down with her. He places his hand on her leg and before he can utter a word she calls security and he gets thrown out the bar. The fourth and final friend walks over to her table and bluntly says "want to go have unprotected sex"? They became married 2 months later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy is sitting with a woman at a bar late at night and they are flirting with each other. The lady tells him all about herself and the man sits there listening. After she is done, the man repeats what she said. "So, you''re a 20 year old college graduate from Harvard, a famous fashion model, you love video games and football, you like to do housework, you never complain, you don''t own a cell phone, you''re a virgin, your parents are dead and they left you loads of money, you have perfect teeth, shiny and smooth hair, no wrinkles or blemishes, you have 2% body fat, you''re always willing to have sex, your brother is Peyton Manning, you have a hot bi-sexual roommate, and a 3 story house". She nods her head, "Yup, that''s me". The man squints at her and asks, "Is that pre-op or post-op?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John had been working for an Advertising Firm for almost three years, and was getting a promotion, when his boss called him into his office. "John, I''m sorry, I''m gonna have to let you go. When I put you up for promotion, the company did a background check, and we found out that you got kicked out of Yale for lying about getting your diploma. I''m sorry, but I need you out within the hour." "But I''ve been working so hard, I''ve been doing such good work," John said "I''m sorry, John, but we can''t have liars working for us." "But this is an advertising firm!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A machine operator comes home from the factory and tells his wife, "Honey, I''ve got some good news and some bad news. First, the good news, I got $25,000 severance pay!" His wife said, "$25,000 in severance pay? That''s great! So what''s the bad news?" He said, "Wait till you hear what was severed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many ventriloquists does it take to change a light bulb? Two - one to change the light bulb, and one to holg ge gottong og ge lagger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when a president gets elected in a year with a "0" at the end? 1840: William Henry Harrison (Died in Office) 1860: Abraham Lincoln (Assassinated) 1880: James A. Garfield (Assassinated) 1900: William McKinley (Assassinated) 1920: Warren G. Harding (Died in Office) 1940: Franklin D. Roosevelt (Died in Office) 1960: John F. Kennedy (Assassinated) 1980: Ronald Reagan (Survived assassination attempt) And to think that we had two guys duking it out in the courts to be the one elected in 2000!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the greatest prostitute in history? Ms.Pacman For 50 cents she''ll swallow balls until she dies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A professional photographer, at a friend''s house for dinner, was asked to show his portfolio from a recent overseas trip. His friends were quite impressed. "What wonderful photos!" said the host''s wife. "You must have a very expensive camera." The photographer just smiled and waited until after dinner, when he said, "Thank you for the delicious meal. You must have very *expensive* pans!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Poop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A midget walks into a bar and trips over some sh*t left on the floor. Luckily no one saw him, so to avoid embarrassment, he doesn''t make a fuss about it. So he goes to bar and orders a drink. A few minutes later a big fella comes to the bar and trips over the same piece of sh*t. The midget smiles and says, "I just did that". So the big fella comes over to the midget and knocks him out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? R R A Y Y X-ray!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fill in the blank: The one who says it cannot be done should never _________ the one who is doing it. Interrupt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? HOT HOT HANDLE HANDLE Too hot to handle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? E L G G U R T S Uphill struggle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Using the BrainTracker grid below, how many words can you find? Each word must contain the central W and no letter can be used twice, however, the letters do not have to be connected. Proper nouns are not allowed, however, plurals are. There is at least one nine letter word. Excellent: 23 words. Good: 18 words. Average: 15 words. Common words: low, lower, lowlier, owe, owl, pew, pillow, power, prow, prowl, row, we, weir, well, will, willow, WILLPOWER, wipe, wiper, wire, woe, wore, wow. All words: low, lowe, lower, lowlier, lwei, ow, owe, owl, pew, pillow, plew, plow, plower, pow, power, prow, prowl, row, rowel, we, weir, well, wile, will, willer, willow, willower, WILLPOWER, wipe, wiper, wire, wo, woe, wore, wow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? M L I K Milk shake!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fill in the blanks such that the second blank is the reverse action of the first one: The famous musician Mozart ________ symphonies when he was alive and __________ after he died. Composed and decomposed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please answer yes or no to this question. Is your answer "no"? Hint: This is under trick, remember. Answer: Yes or no.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? B SAI Bonsai! B (on) SAI.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? knee light light Neon lights!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('little susie was looking through her mothers purse and found a tampon and said what is this ? her mother said a pen. so later on that day he mother went shopping and an elderly man said miss do you have a pen and so little susie said it''s in mommy''s bagina !!!! so the old mans teeth fell out and he dropped to huis knees and said do you want me to search?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? HEAR T Broken heart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? T N O R F O T Back to front!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? WOWOLFOL Wolf in sheep''s clothing (wool)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? R E N N U R Runner up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? heart heart heart Heart-to-heart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? STEPPETSPETS One step forward, two steps back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? EGASSAM Back massage!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? DO WN Broken down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? Way One Way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What letter comes next? D, L, M, M, J, V, ... S. The letters are the first letters of Spanish days of the week, domingo, lunes, martes, miercoles, jueves, viernes, sabado.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He v. She The family picture is on his desk - Ah, a solid, responsible family man. The family picture is on her desk - Um, her family will come before her career. His desk is cluttered - He''s obviously a hard worker and a busy man. Her desk is cluttered - She''s obviously a disorganized scatterbrain. He is talking with his co-workers - He must be discussing the latest deal. She is talking with her co-workers - She must be gossiping. He''s not in the office - He must be meeting a customer. She''s not in the office - She must be out shopping. He''s having lunch with the boss - He''s on his way up. She''s having lunch with the boss - They must be having an affair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pal is addicted to brake fluid - but he says he can stop any time he wants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Started a great book the other day - I couldn''t put it down. It''s called "The History of Glue"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jenny: How did the turtle cross the freeway? Forrest: I don''t know. Jenny: Take the ''r'' out of ''free''. Now, take the ''f'' out of ''way''. Forrest: There''s no ''f'' in way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Any horizontal surface is soon piled up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a dog do in your backyard that you don''t want to step in? Dig a hole. If you step in the hole, you might twist your ankle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m having trouble with this new hearing aid, said the man to his audiologist. "Really? Can you describe the symptoms?" "Sure. Homer is fat and yellow, Marge has blue hair..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Irishmen were sitting at a pub having beer and watching the brothel across the street. They saw a Baptist minister walk into the brothel, and one of them said, "Aye, ''tis a shame to see a man of the cloth goin'' bad." A bit later, they saw a Rabbi enter the brothel, and the other Irishman said, "Aye, ''tis a shame to see that the Jews are fallin'' victim to temptation as well." Then they see a Catholic priest enter the brothel, and one of the Irishmen said, "What a terrible pity ... one of the girls must be dying''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde walks into an electronic store. A saleswoman goes up to him and introduces a washing machine. Saleswoman: Sir, this machine in gurantee to do half of all your laundry. Blonde: That''s nice, I''ll take two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor Simon is known throughout town as one of the best consultants on arthritis. He always has a waiting room full of people who need his advice and specialist treatment. One day, Betty, an elderly lady, slowly struggles into his waiting room. She is completely bent over and leans heavily on her walking stick. A chair is found for her. Eventually, her turn comes to go into Doctor Simon''s office. 15 minutes later, to everyone''s surprise, she comes briskly out of his room walking almost upright. She is holding her head high and has a smile on her face. A woman in the waiting room says to Betty, "It''s unbelievable, a miracle even. You walk in bent in half and now you walk out erect. What a fantastic doctor he is. Tell me, what did Doctor Simon do to you?" "Miracle, shmiracle," says Betty, "he just gave me a longer walking stick."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the thieves that broke into the United Jewish Appeal offices? They got away with over a million dollars in pledges!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Maurice has a business appointment, and he arrives a little early. The receptionist points to a comfortable easy chair and asks him to be seated for a while. Maurice settles down, picks up a glossy magazine opens it, and tries to read. However, he finds that he cannot concentrate because he is distracted due to a rumpus coming from behind one of the doors leading off the reception area. Maurice goes over to the receptionist and asks, "What''s going on in there?" She replies, "It''s a partners'' meeting." "But why are they shouting at each other?" Maurice asks. "It''s a battle of wits," she replies. Maurice asks: "Who is in there?" and she answers, "Horowits, Lebowits, Rabbinowits and Abramowits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the old gentleman said to his wife, "Just think, honey, we''ve been married for 50 years." "Yeah," she replied, "Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together." "I know," the old man said, "We were probably sitting here naked as jaybirds fifty years ago." "Well," Granny snickered, "What do you say...should we get naked?" Where upon the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table. "You know, honey," the little old lady breathlessly replied, "My breasts are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago." "I wouldn''t be surprised," replied Gramps. "One''s in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Change the position of just one of the words below so that all the words are in an alphabetical sequence: llama phoenix hyena alligator beaver elephant tortoise antelope Antelope. Move it from the end to the beginning, the initial letters will then spell ALPHABET!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Put the characters C - D - I - M - L - V - X in the right order - but not alphabetical. I - V - X - L - C - D - M. Roman numerals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother, Julian, is a little simple. I recently asked him to buy me some ribbon for my daughter''s pretty pink bonnet. He went to the haberdashery shop for the required length but accidentally interchanged the feet and inches. When I measured the resulting ribbon I only had 30% of the length I required. How much ribbon did I originally ask for? I asked for 9 foot 2 inches (110 inches) and my brother brought me 2 foot 9 inches (33 inches).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which word is the odd one out? seventy brawl clover proper carrot swing change travel sacred stone Carrot. Each of the other words remains a real word if you remove the first and last letter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you complete this sentence using two words which are anagrams of each other? Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog _______. Luckily, he managed to complete the _______ manoeuvre without crashing. Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog barking. Luckily, he managed to complete the braking manoeuvre without crashing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? P E T S Step up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat Catch 22! (22 cats).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? B O N E S Broken bones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? lookkool Look both ways!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? pu Back up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Jimmy was at the mall with his mother when a man came walking toward them. Little Jimmy hopped up and down, laughed, pointed, and screamed, "Mommy! Look at that bowlegged man!" His mother was so embarrassed. "James, your manners are atrocious! You need some culture, young man!" For the next month Little Jimmy was forced to read Shakespeare every night. When his detention was finally over, his mother again took him to the same mall. Sure enough, the same bowlegged man came walking toward them. Had Little Jimmy learned anything from the great bard? Yes. This time, as the man approached, Little Jimmy cried out, "Hark! What manner of man is this me sees, who wears his balls in parentheses?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10=D in a M 10 decimeters in a meter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10=E on B 10 editors on braingle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? R U N Run down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? W O R K SEESAWS Overseas work!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? QQQQQQ No excuse. There is no X listed, but there are some Qs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat Copy cat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME Pyramid scheme!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? ED CROWD Over crowded: [CROWD over ED].', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? E E Y E E D D Cross eyed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 C A and 4 H A in a M M 1 carbon atom and 4 hydrogen atoms in a methane molecule!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman: I did something special today. Man: What? Woman: I rode on a hippo. Man: Surely you musn''t be kidding. Woman: Yes I''m not kidding and don''t call me Shirley.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a chicken''s favorite type of joke? The human who crossed the road!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Osama bin Laden and one of his followers were riding on a camel when they stopped at a small town. Bin Laden gets off the camel and lifts up its tail and looks at the camel''s butt. Just then a guy comes over and says, "What are you doing?" Osama replies, "About 2 miles back I heard someone say, ''Hey, look at the two assholes on that camel."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, there was 3 Chinese people who wanted to go to America. Their names were Bu, Chu, and Fu. Since these names would sound awfully weird, Bu said, "I''ll change my name to Buck, adding ''ck'' to the end." Chu said, "Then I''ll become Chuck." After a long pause, Fu said, "I guess I''ll go back to China."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Chinese man asks this guy what he does for a living. The guy says, ''I''m a comedian.'' The Chinese guy says ''No, u no camedien!'' The guy says, ''Yer, I am, honest.'' The Chinese guy says, ''No, you''re not, ploove it, change coror!'' (He says it like chameleon)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Hitlers least favorite planet? ''Jewpiter''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get 100 jews into a car? Throw a quarter in it. How do you get them out again? Tell them Hilter is driving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a restaurant, and asks the waiter: Man: Waiter, how much is a cup of coffee? Waiter: 50 cents, sir. Man: How much are refills? Waiter: They are free. Man: That''s nice, I''ll have a refill, please.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know you have a queer Jew? He likes money more than girls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the Jewish sports car? It stops on a dime, then picks it up', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the object of Jewish football? To get the quarter back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Jews walk around the desert for 40 years? They heard that someone dropped a quarter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when a Jew with an erection walks into a wall? He breaks his nose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s faster than a speeding bullet? A jew with a coupon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Black Priest called? Holy Shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Father: "So you want to be my son-in-law, do you?" Boyfriend: "Not particularly, but since I want to marry your daughter, I haven''t much choice!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two executives were talking in the executive washroom. "My wife says I don''t display enough passion. Imagine the audacity! I think I''ll send her a memo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always keep several "get well" cards on the mantle. That way, if unexpected guests arrive they will think you have been sick and unable to clean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The discovery that Bush''s resting heart rate is 43 has led some observers to speculate that this is the first time we''ve had a president with a heart rate that matches his IQ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Asked by his teacher to compare three presidents Johnny thought for a moment and said: "Well, George Washington couldn''t tell a lie. Richard Nixon couldn''t tell the truth. And George W. Bush can''t tell the difference."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 sharks meet in the ocean. They talk about the people they recently have eaten. The first one says, "I swallowed the Ayatollah yesterday, but the guy had eaten so much garlic I still feel sick." The second shark says, "That''s nothing pal! I swallowed Boris Yeltsin last week and the old guy had so much vodka in him that I''m still drunk." The third shark laughs and said, "You lucky guys! I swallowed George W. Bush 3 weeks ago and the guy has so much air in his head, I still can''t dive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into Starbucks. Man: I want a cup of coffee. Blond Waitress: Sure that will be $1.00 The man pays for the coffee, the blond then goes and measures a cup of coffee and brings it to the man, she dumps it all onto his table. Man: I wanted a cup of coffee, not this!! Blond: You wanted a "cup" of coffee, if you wanted a cup you could of asked for one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chris and his friend Johnathan are standing outside of school one day. Johnathan finds Chris wearing his hair black and slicked down, with a purple stripe, with mascara and nail polish and a Korn t-shirt. Johnathan: So, Chris, what''s with the new outfit? Chris: I''m Emo. Johnathan: You are not Emo. Chris: Yeah I am, my life has no meaning and I listen to Korn; I''m extremely Emo. Johnathan: Did you watch Family Guy last night? Chris: Yeah. Johnathan: ... Chris: ...OH! Guess I''m not Emo. Johnathan: Yup. Chris: Can I still listen to Korn? Johnathan: Sure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Israel''s economy is in a bad way, inflation is getting higher and immigrants are flooding in from all over the world. Problems, problems, problems, but what should they do? So the Knesset holds a special session to come up with a solution. After several hours of talk without progress, one member, Yitzhak, stands up and says, "Quiet everyone, I''ve got it, I''ve got the solution to all our problems. We''ll declare war on the United States." Everyone starts shouting at once. "You''re nuts! That''s crazy!" "Hear me out!" says Yitzhak. "We declare war, we lose; the United States does what she always does when she defeats a country. She rebuilds everything; our highways, airports, shipping ports, schools, hospitals, factories, and loans us money, and sends us food aid. Our problems would be over. "Sure," says Benny, another minister, "that''s if we lose - but what if we win?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two five year-olds, one Jewish, the other Catholic, are playing in a sandpit. Sean says to David, "Our priest knows more about things than your rabbi!" To which David replies, "Of course he does, you tell him everything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best way to end a war is to surrender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is the worst joke ever. Give it no smiley face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is the best joke ever! Give it a full smiley :) :) :) :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guys were sitting around a bar talking about things they bet on. A woman down at the end of the bar says, "I bet on things!" The bartender says, "Oh Yeah! What do you bet on?" Woman, "Most anything." Bartender, "Like what for instance?" Woman, "See that wall over there? I bet I can pee higher on that wall than you can!" Bartender, (Thinks about this for a minute) "I''ll take that bet! How much do you want to bet?" Woman, "You name your poison." Bartender, "I''ll bet you a thousand bucks." Woman, "Ok!" Bartender, "Ladies first." Woman, Pulls up her dress, pulls down her panties, leans back and pees. "Your turn," she replies. Bartender, Unzips his pants gets his sure tool out; gets ready to pee. Woman, "Hey....you got to do with NO HANDS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A businessman boarded a plane and sat next to Hannah, an elegant woman wearing the largest and most stunning diamond ring he had ever seen. He asked her about it. "This is the Egoheimer diamond," Hannah said. "It''s beautiful, but there is a terrible curse that goes with it." "What''s the curse?" the man asked. "Mr Egoheimer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wig factory was broken into last night and a large quantity of wigs was stolen. Police are combing the area.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harry and his neighbour Joe often borrowed things from each other. One day, Harry asked to borrow Joe''s ladder. Joe said, "Sorry Harry, I''ve lent it to my son." Remembering a saying that his grandma often used to tell him, Harry said, "Joe, you should never lend anything to your children because you''ll never get it back." Joe replied, "Don''t worry, it''s not my ladder - it''s my dad''s."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Sarah were Londoners and were blessed with seven healthy children. After many months of discussion, they finally decided to move to New York. It should have been a simple enough move, but when they arrived, they had great difficulty finding a suitable apartment to live in. Although many were big enough, the landlords always seemed to object to such a large family living there. If only Bill wasn''t so honest about the size of his family! After several days of unsuccessful searching, Bill had an idea. He told Sarah to take the four younger children to visit the local cemetery while he went with the older three children to find an apartment. After looking for most of the morning, Bill found a place that was ideal. The landlord asked him, "How many children do you have?" Bill answered with a deep sigh, "Seven . . . but four are with their dear mother in the cemetery." He got the apartment!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pete and Mick were in court and standing before the judge. "Why can''t this case be settled out of court?" the judge asked. Pete looked up at the judge and said, "That''s what we were trying to do, your honour, when the police interfered."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you do not want to say you''re a guy, do not read this joke. (I do not know if this is funny) Instructions: At the end of each sentence say "I''m a Guy" You meet this hot girl. (I''m a Guy) You ask her out. (I''m a Guy) You take her to the movies. (I''m a Guy) You buy her popcorn. (I''m a Guy) She asks you over. (I''m a Guy) When she closes the door she whispers in your ear. I''M A GUY!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A masked man all of a sudden gave a beggar 1 million dollars. Man: Why did you give me so much money? Masked Robber: I steal from the rich and give to the poor. Man: I''m rich! Masked Robber: Okay give me all your money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl named Zoey goes up to an artist and asks him to paint a picture of her face. "But Miss Zoey, if I paint a picture of your face then I can never be an artist again." "Why?" she asked. "Because if I look at your face too long, I will go blind."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is bitten by a rabid dog he found wandering in his yard. Frantically, he rushes his computer and begins typing something. His neighbor walks in, and mentions to him that he need not worry, there is a cure for rabies. He replies, "I know that; I''m finding where George Bush is right now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was unhappy with the way her laundry was done at the local Chinese Laundry, so she wrote a note and put it in the bag with the next collection of soiled clothes : "USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!" She got the clean laundry back, and was still dissatisfied with the results, so the following week she enclosed another note: "USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!" The Chinese laundryman became very annoyed, and when her clean laundry was delivered, it contained a note from him: "I USE PLENTY SOAP ON PANTIES!!!USE MORE PAPER ON ASS!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('16 more white keys than black keys on a piano.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8*4 = worlds in super mario brothers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beijing = Capital of China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8 = planets in solar system.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('X-axis + Y-axis + Z-axis + time = 4 dimensions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('7 + 7 + 7 = Jackpot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3.6 = coulombs in a milliampere-hour.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Fibonacci sequence 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21... starts with two 1''s, and each term afterward is the sum of its two predecessors. Which one of the ten digits is the last to appear in the units position of a number in the Fibonacci sequence? Just write out their units digits, and mark the digits that appear for the first time. (1), 1, (2), (3), (5), (8), 3, 1, (4), 5, (9), 4, 3, (7), (0), ... Therefore, 6 is the last to appear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A A A A K = biggest 4 of a kind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Natrium chloride = table salt. "Natrium", from which the symbol "Na" derives, is the German word of "sodium".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? B BUSINESS BUSINESS A C K Getting back down to business!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? ABCDEFGHIJKMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ 2 Mistletoe! (Miss L two.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? RU[color=red]E[/color] Are you ready: [R U + red E].', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? DEINPTH VESTINIGATION In depth investigation!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? BALLBBALLABALLSBALLKBALLEBALLTBALL Basket Balls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? T T T U I U L P L I T I P O P S E S Tiptoe through the tulips!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? FORWARD Straightforward!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? ONALLE All in one!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? L L I H Uphill!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries and troubles, and lighten your burden." Boy: "That''s very kind of you, darling, but I don''t have any worries or troubles." Girl: "Yes, well, that''s because we aren''t married yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been out of work for a while, so when I found a job sorting salt and pepper, I was most pleased. The only drawback is that it''s seasonal work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('YOU''RE READING IT, YOU DOPE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MADE YOU LOOK!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lesson 5: A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven''t got the energy." "Well, why don''t you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. They''re packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree. Moral of the story BullShit might get you to the top, but it won''t keep you there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Homework... something you go to school hours for and not do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? MTGG A hungry horse! MT (empty) GG (gee gee = horse).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher the following common phrase? AND ED Underhanded!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto. Pluto because it''s no longer a planet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the last thing that Abraham Lincoln did? He died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8 protons, 8 neutrons and 8 electrons in an oxygen atom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? E D O W N D I S Upside down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? E N U T Tune up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The computer, the greatest invention in life even though it''s bad for you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Natalie had three very active young sons and they were quite a handful. One summer evening she was playing cowboys and Indians with them in her front garden when one of the boys "shot" her and shouted "Bang! You''re dead, Mum," so Natalie fell down. Her next door neighbour had been watching all this and when Natalie didn''t get up straight away, he ran over to see if she had been hurt in the fall. When the neighbour bent over her, Natalie opened one eye and said to him, "Shhh. Please don''t give me away, it''s the only chance I''ve had to have a rest all day".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Louis was talking to his friend Pete. "There''s nothing I wouldn''t do for my Becky," he said, "and there''s nothing Becky wouldn''t do for me, and that''s how we go through life - doing nothing for each other."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once a blonde decided that she wanted a kid. when she had it she couldnt decide what to name it. she asked around but no one had the right name. some people wanted huga butte and some wanted gatta pee pee. she went with ma hore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story. I was texting my one friend, and we both get bored easy. This is part of our one convo. Him: Mew! I''m a kitty! Me: Woof! I''m a puppy! Him: Oink! I''m a cow! Me: Quack! I''m a zebra! Him: Bang! I''m a hoe! Me: Man, u got me beat on tht 1!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is stupid that she went hunting for whales in Ohio!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s breath is so bad, that when she entered the basement all the rats passed out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What did God say after creating Adam A. I must be able to do better than that. Q. How do you get a man to do sit-ups? A. Put the remote control between his toes. Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A. A widow. Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm cells to fertilize one egg? A. They won''t stop to ask for directions. Q. Why does a penis have a hole in the end? A. So men can be open minded. Q. How are men and parking spots alike? A. Good ones are always taken. Free ones are mostly handicapped or extremely small. Q. What is the one thing that all men at single bars have in common? A. They are all married.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with a p and ends with the letters orn? Popcorn! What were you thinking? What starts with a f and ends with the letters uck? Firetruck! What were you thinking? What starts with a b and ends with the letters itch? Bewitch! What were you thinking?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Going home on the bus one evening a man was whiling away the time by doing a crossword. Three more men got on the bus at the next stop, and as they passed, one said, "If it''s any help to you, 7 Up is lemonade."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do this on a calculator! So here''s the story: a woman had 69 boobs which was too too too much. So she went to 51st street and the doctor took all the time he had and ate all the boobs and she became boobless! 69 boobs 222 much 51st street 6922251 X time 6922251 X 8 ate 6922251 =55378008 flip your calculator, and she became boobless!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Japanese doctor says, "Medicine in our country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him out looking for work in six weeks." A German doctor says, "That is nothing. We can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him out looking for work in four weeks." A British doctor says, "In my country medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have both of them out looking for work in four weeks." The Canadian doctor, not to be outdone, interjected, "You guys are way behind. We took a woman with no brains, sent her to Michigan where she became Governor, and now half the state is out looking for work."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there It''s me. This is not a joke. It''s me. This is not a joke. who? Grrrrrrrrrr...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Judi, did you ever try marriage counseling? Monika asked. "No," Judi snarled. "That stupid dickhead, shit-for-brains, moronic ex-husband of mind would have just told the counselor I was ''insensitive.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Try this on a friend: Every time you say something, tell the other to say the same thing and add "bait" at the end. Example: fish --> fish bait fish (fish bait) dolphin (dolphin bait) seal (seal bait) I master (I masturbate!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a pet store, plants a bomb, and as he leaves, calls out, "You have one minute to get out!" At that, a tortoise at the back of the shop shouts, "You BASTARD!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning, Pete and Sally decided to go out for breakfast. The waitress at The Almond Tree told them that the special that morning was two eggs, tomatoes, mushrooms, hash browns and toast for $3.99. "That sounds good," said Sally, "but I don''t want the eggs." "OK," said the waitress, "but I will then have to charge you $4.50." "Why?" asked Pete, "it doesn''t make sense." "Because you will then in effect be ordering a la carte," the waitress replied. "Do you mean I''ll have to pay for not taking the eggs?" Sally asked. "Yes," replied the waitress. "OK then, I''ll take the special," says Sally. "How do you want your eggs done?" asked the waitress. "Raw and in the shell," Sally replied. At the end of the meal, Sally took the two eggs home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary took her husband Bernie to see a psychiatrist for a check up. After examining him, the doctor took Mary to one side and said, "I have some very bad news for you. There is nothing I can do to help your husband. His mind has completely gone." "I''m not really surprised," Mary replied, "Bernie''s been giving me a piece of it every day for the last 50 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As part of a class project, the teacher had every student create a model rocket. When she was teaching them about how the rockets lift into the air, some kids seemed to be confused. She scolded them yelling, "It''s not that hard! It''s not rocket science!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the gay guy that put a Nicotine patch on his penis? He''s down to three butts a day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so old, she has toys made in America.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My bus driver for my school is always trying to say that he''s a gangster. But no one ever believes him so the other day I confronted him. So I asked, "are you really a gangster"? He sweated nervously, shaking and then he finally answered "of course I am I''m from the West Side". I did not feel that to be a sufficient answer so I then asked him "West Side of where"? He mumbled to himself a while and then answered me "West Side of Malibu".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike, a 3-year-old, proudly walked into the kitchen of his house carrying a caterpillar. However, his mother was disgusted and wanted Mike to take it outside. "Mike, his mother is probably looking for him. Why don''t you take him outside?" said the mother. Three minutes later, Mike was back. "Look mommy!" he said, showing his mother two caterpillars. "I got his mommy too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('5 = diagonals of a pentagon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9 = diagonals of a hexagon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 = 2+2', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9 = tails of a fox.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 = special administrative regions in China. (Hong Kong and Macau)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dozen^2 = Gross.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('100 = decimeters in a decameter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('101 = keys on a computer keyboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went down the hill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack = 11 in cards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few months after his parents were divorced, Nick passed by his mom''s bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, "I need a man, I need a man!" Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times. One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her. Nick ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning, "Ohh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few people wanted to ride a train. They brought the tickets and got on. Then they realized that the train didn''t have bathrooms. One passenger had to go and he was not going to get off because the train could leave any moment. So he stuck his butt out the window and was in the middle of his business when suddenly someone annouced,"Hey! The passenger with the big face, you can''t stick your head out the window and eat a huge piece of chocolate!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday my mother asked me to buy some stamps. Stamps, are available in 3p, 9p, 11p, 17p and 21p denominations. For three types of stamp I was asked to buy eight of each. For the other two types of stamp, I was asked to buy nine of each. Unfortunately I forgot which I was supposed to buy eight of and which to buy nine of. Luckily my mother had given me the exact money required to buy the stamps, 5.00 and the shopkeeper was able to give me the correct stamps. Which stamps did I buy? Eight lots of 11p, 17p and 21p and nine lots of 3p and 9p. The shopkeeper rightly figured that I required eight lots of each of the stamps, which came to 4.88, he also knew I required two more stamps which added up to the difference. QED.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Polly Perkins was after a talking parrot, so she went to the local pet shop in the hope of securing such a find. She was in luck. The shop assistant assured her that the parrot would learn and repeat any word or phrase it heard. Polly was delighted. However, a week later, the parrot still hadn''t spoken a word. Polly returned to the shop to complain, however, it appeared that the assistant was accurate in what he had said, and refused a refund. Why didn''t the parrot talk? The parrot was deaf and as such couldn''t repeat a single word it had heard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('HWAYETRDETIPZLHV OMNLTESOSHSUZEAE 32. Reading one letter from the top row and then one from the bottom row, the puzzle reads: ''How many letters does this puzzle have''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently, Snow White''s seven dwarfs met up with three of their friends and went to the cinema to see Bambi. From the clues below, can you determine the order in which they stood in the ticket queue? Grumpy was in front of Dopey. Stumpy was behind Sneezy and Doc. Doc was in front of Droopy and Happy. Sleepy was behind Stumpy, Smelly and Happy. Happy was in front of Sleepy, Smelly and Bashful. Bashful was behind Smelly, Droopy and Sleepy. Sneezy was in front of Dopey. Smelly was in front of Grumpy, Stumpy and Sneezy. Dopey was in front of Droopy. Sleepy was in front of Grumpy and Bashful. Dopey was behind Sneezy, Doc and Sleepy. Stumpy was in front of Dopey. Smelly was behind Doc. Doc Happy Smelly Sneezy Stumpy Sleepy Grumpy Dopey Droopy Bashful', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peter decided to walk to the local waterfall, 10 miles away. At the moment he started, his dog ran off from his side and proceeded to the waterfall at a constant 8 miles per hour. As soon as the dog reached the waterfall, it started the return journey to Peter, keeping to the same speed. The dog continued this odd behaviour until Peter reached the waterfall. If Peter kept to a constant 4 miles per hour, how far did the dog run in total? 20 miles: Peter took 2.5 hours to reach the waterfall. The dog was always running at 8 miles per hour, therefore it ran 20 miles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? KCAB KCAB Back to back: [i.e. two back(s) - written back(wards)]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? EHCA Backache!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? box box box box box box box box box box box box Shit box box box box box box box box box box box box Shit in the box!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? STEP -> A step in the right direction!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is snippet of section A of the curious multiple-choice entrance exam into the exclusive puzzle club. 1. The first question with B as the correct answer is: A. 1 B. 4 C. 3 D. 2 2. The answer to Question 4 is: A. D B. A C. B D. C 3. The answer to Question 1 is: A. D B. C C. B D. A 4. The number of questions which have D as the correct answer is: A. 3 B. 2 C. 1 D. 0 5. The number of questions which have B as the correct answer is: A. 0 B. 2 C. 3 D. 1 1. C 2. D 3. B 4. C 5. B', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde couple were going on a vacation to the countryside visiting their relatives. As they soon reach their relatives'' home and go in, a blackout started. On and on the couple tried to find a source of light. Finally one of the blonde asks, "Hey, Mary, can you find anything?" Mary replies, "Nope, all I could find was this pair of flashlights."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Jesus signed on at 11:29 pm.] Jesus: Hello and welcome to the kingdom of heaven! Bob: Oh wow you mean I can come in? Jesus: All are welcome. Tell me what is the way you died? Bob: Well I was in a coma. Half my family wanted me on life support half didn''t. Jesus: I see... Bob: Oh crap brb [Bob went away at 11:31 pm.] Jesus: ? :( [Bob came back at 11:45 pm.] Bob: Sorry other half of the family Jesus: I see... now this is- Bob: brb [Bob went away at 11:47 pm.] Jesus: ... [Bob came back at 11:59 pm.] Bob: They just can''t make up their minds! Jesus: Clearly... Bob: So Heaven eh? Jesus: Yea it''s the most [Bob went away at 12:02 am] Jesus: Screw this. [Jesus signed out at 12:03 am.] [Bob came back at 12:17 am] Bob: Jesus they decided to let me die! Bob: Both sides agreed... Bob: Jesus? Bob: You there? [Satan signed in at 12:19 am]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Meteorologists - People who tell something wrong and still get paid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Period- The thing at the end of a sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1st Stage (0-8)- You believe in Santa 2nd Stage (9-26)- You don''t believe in Santa 3rd Stage (27-45)- You are Santa 4th Stage (46-80)- You look like Santa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde explains to another blonde friend: "I failed the driving test. I entered the circle-way and the sign said "30" so I drove 30 times around." And the other one says: "You probably counted wrong."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem. 2. You''re adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelette. 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans. 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say. 5. Your using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says, "How''s my driving? call 1-800-***-****. 6. Everyone''s head looks like an invitation to batting practice. 7. You''re convinced there''s a God and he''s male. 8. You''re counting down the days until menopause. 9. You''re sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy. 10. The Ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You get mad when you don''t find a fly in your soup. 2. You buy out the supply of wart removal cream in your drugstore constantly. 3. French chefs are eyeing your legs and appear to be following you. 4. Bug lamps appear to you as a curse. 5. On applications, you list ''Pond'' as your home address. 6. Kermit is your idol. 7. You get mad whenever Miss Piggy makes a pass at Kermit. 8. Have seen the movie ''The Fly'' at least ten times. 9. You live in fear that some day you will wind up in a child''s aquarium. 10. France is the evil empire to you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10) Getting six hours of sleep is a privilege. 9) The sentence, "Honey, could you take his foot out of my pocket?" sounds normal. 8) You are used to doing everything one-handed. 7) The thought of your mother-in-law coming over for a few hours is a pleasant one. 6) The list of bodily fluids that disgust you has shortened, possibly to zero. 5) Your idea of romance is handholding. 4) You answer the question, "How are you?" with, "We''re fine." 3) You decide whether a shirt is wearable, not based on sweatiness, but based on how well the spit-up stains match the shirt''s main color. 2) You see a slender teenage girl walking down your street, and you think, "Hey, I wonder if I could interest her in . . . babysitting?" And the #1 way to tell that you''re a new dad: 1) It takes you two months to write and send out a simple Top-10-style joke email.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. If it''s wet make it dry. 9. If it''s dry make it wet. 8. Always ask for on-call pay before agreeing to overtime. 7. Never tell management what you are really thinking. 6. Never finish report with, "You have an easy assignment". 5. Never say. "This looks like a easy assignment". 4. Don''t expect nurses aids to do their job. 3. Don''t expect doctors to believe any thing you tell them. 2. If you don''t have enough time to do everything, take about 30 minutes to complain about it. 1. If it moves, rattles, shakes, falls down, or won''t stay in place, tape it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the moron stare at frozen orange juice? Because it said ''concentrate.'' Did you hear about the moron that got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize he could play it at night! What did the moron say when he put a quarter in the parking meter? Hey! Where is my gumball? Why did the moron tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? He didn''t want to wake the sleeping pills! How do you drown a moron? Put scratch-n-sniff stickers at the bottom of the pool! Why did the moron climb the glass wall? To see what was on the other side! Why can''t morons dial 911? They can''t find the 11 on the phone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('But everybody looks funny naked! You woke me up for that? Did I mention the video camera? Hurry up! This room rents by the hour! Can you please pass me the remote control? Do you accept Visa? ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ On second thought, let''s turn off the lights. Do you get any premium movie channels? Try not to smear my make-up, will ya? But I just brushed my teeth . . . Smile, you''re on Candid Camera! Did you know the ceiling needs painting? Did I remember to take my pill? But my cat always sleeps on that pillow . . . Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed? You''re almost as good as my ex! Now I know why he/she dumped you . . . What are you planning to make for breakfast? I have a confession . . . You can cook too, right? Sorry about the name tags, I''m not very good with names. Don''t mind me . . . I always file my nails in bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you complete this sentence using two words which are anagrams of each other? Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog _______. Luckily, he managed to complete the _______ manoeuvre without crashing. Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog barking. Luckily, he managed to complete the braking manoeuvre without crashing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a machine which has four cog wheels in constant mesh. The largest cog has 72 teeth and the others have 36, 25 and 15 respectively. How many revolutions must the largest cog make before each of the cogs is back in its starting position? 25 revolutions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remove seven letters from this grid to leave two numbers. S F E V E I N L V E T E T F E R O S U R Simply remove ''SEVEN LETTERS'' and you are left with FIVE and FOUR: - F - - - I - - V - - E - F - - O - U R', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with an E, ends with an E and usually contains only one letter? ENVELOPE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was traveling from Chesterton to Newcastle recently when I came across a sign which had fallen off its post at the crossroads. It was marked to Newcastle, Chesterton, Knutton and Silverdale. Unfortunately I didn''t know which road to take to Newcastle and had hoped the sign would help. Luckily, I had a great idea which helped me put the sign back up pointing correctly to Newcastle. What was my idea? I simply pointed Chesterton back the way I had come and this left the sign in its correct orientation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which word is the odd one out: football polo badminton baseball golf tennis cricket billiards rugby Badminton. This is the only sport which does not use a ball, it uses a shuttlecock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? LASE There are two possible answers. Argon laser: the ''R'' has gone. Or, jumble sale: the letters of sale are jumbled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a recent expedition, three intrepid adventurers were left stranded in the middle of the desert with only a crate full of apples. During the night, Alan woke up and decided to hide his share of the apples, one-third, then promptly fell asleep again. Brian woke up shortly after and also decided to hide a third of the remaining apples and he also dozed back to sleep. Finally, Charlie woke up and seeing the others were asleep, took a third of what was left. Of course none of the adventurers knew of the other''s antics, so, in the morning, they shared the remaining apples, each receiving sixteen. How many apples were in the crate originally? 162 apples. Alan hid 54, leaving 108. Brain hid 36, leaving 72. Charlie hid 24, leaving 48. 48 apples were then available to share in the morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Team has no "I" in it, but it does have a "M" and "E" in it, making "me".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day little Billy went screaming to his mom, "Mommy! Mommy! Theres a shrimp stuck between grandma''s legs!" His mother, intruiged by this, brought Billy to grandma, who was sleeping on the bed with her legs apart. The mother looked and laughed and said, "Why, that''s not a shrimp! That''s her privates, a vagina!" Billy smiled and said, "Really? It sure tastes like shrimp..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a collection of a few of the Redneck lines I''ve heard (and can remember) over the years . . . You know you''re a redneck when: You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos. Your wife weighs more than your refrigerator. Your shopping list only has beer on it. The biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you''ll wear to the 4-H Fair. You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard. You move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow. You go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift. You mow your lawn and find a car. Your "pet" eats more than you. You can spit without opening your mouth. You refer to sixth grade as "your senior year". You refer Chuck Norris as: God, Santa Claus, and the Harvest Man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Managed to remember some MORE Redneck lines while hearing a couple more. You know you''re a redneck when: You lost your virginity at the age of 11. You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut. Taking a dip has nothing to do with water. There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog. You take a fishing pole to Sea World. The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car. Your TV is a bag of manure on fire. Your "family reunion" was at the NRA convention. Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap. You''ve shot somebody over a mall parking space. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. Making a chocolate cake has nothing to do with chocolate. You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now here''s a classic joke that''s been told by many kids, that should be very well known . . . anyway, after you read this, it''s funny to try it on someone After every statement, say, "Behind the rock" 1. Billy went 2. He took off his shoes 3. He took off his socks 4. He took off his shirt 5. He took off his pants 6. He took off his undies 7. He made out with someone 8. Where were you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politically correct word for dead: Living Impaired', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Was there any doubt?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wonder if my friend, Kent as submitted a joke about me saying how brave I am.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Would you like some chocolate ice cream and lemonade? Yes? Ok! *shits* chocolate ice cream and *pisses* lemonade!that would be $5.00', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a nearly-new television for sale the other day. It has a 42-inch plasma screen, and I bought it for $50. The only thing wrong was that there was no volume control - but at that price, I couldn''t turn it down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tramp knocked on the door of a house. "What do you want?" said the owner. "Can you spare some money to help a poor person?" said the beggar. As soon he was given a few coins and told to go on his way, the beggar complained, "Your son gave me twice as much when I called here last week." "Well, my son can afford to," said the owner, "he has a very rich father."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Elsie walked into a print lab to have a photo of her deceased husband copied and retouched. She said to the technician, "I have always hated the hat that my husband is wearing in the photo. Could you please retouch the hat out?" "Of course," said the technician; "what colour hair did your husband have?" "When you take the hat off, you''ll see," she said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, I was walking my dog around my building...on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights. Not me, I''m afraid of widths. I had a dog once. I spilled spot remover on him, and now he''s gone. I put contact lenses in my dog''s eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. I bought a dog the other day... I named him Stay. It''s fun to call him... "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing. He''s an East German Shepherd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to kick the guy who invented the snooze button...then five minutes later, I''ll kick him again. Thanks Andrew!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Brother: How long is a strong? Big Sister: Huh? Little Brother: Well, I''ve heard of a week...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Conserve water and electricity, shower with a steamy hot friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde''s boyfriend, planning to stop at the bakery says, "I''m going to go pick up a blondie. I want a smoking hot fresh one." The blonde replies, "Well, then we''re over. Go ahead and get a new girlfriend. A nice blondie!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she cut herself and bled gravy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s lips are so big, she made Angelina Jolie jealous!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Philip is telling his friends about his recent divorce. "Yes, it''s true. Sylvie divorced me for religious reasons. She worshipped money and I didn''t have any."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s breath smells so bad, her teeth duck when she yawns!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recent immigrant had just completed a training course titled, ''Improve your English'' and was taking an oral exam. The examiner asked him to spell ''cultivate.'' Jacob spelled it correctly. The examiner then asked Jacob to use the word ''cultivate'' in a sentence. Jacob thought about it for a while, then replied, "Last winter, on a very cold day, I was waiting for the bus but it was too cultivate so I walked home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, you can press her face in some dough and make gorilla cookies!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly the plastic surgeon sued her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly she made a mime scream.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly they renamed "Halloween" "Yo-momma-ween".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Joe are in a diner where there''s a computer who gives advice to the people in the diner. Jack starts talking about how the two are going to graduate from high school when a young boy walks in. He explains his problem to the computer, which gladly offers him advice. The boy walks out happily. The computer comes over to Jack and Joe. Joe asks, "Hey, how come you never help us with our problems?" The computer answers, "I''m just a computer. I''m not a miracle maker."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You perverts..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What color is red? True or false?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man who couldn''t speak correctly. He wanted to go buy some stuff for his wife. First, he needed to buy a bucket. "Excuse me sir, can I buy a fuck-it?" the man asked. The clerk said, "You mean a bucket?" "Yes, that''s what I said, a fuck-it." While the man was walking he found some gum. "Oh look, bum." He took the gum and walked to the pet store. He wanted to buy a cocker spaniel. "Excuse me sir, can I buy a cock-and-spank-it?" "Sure, but you do mean a cocker spaniel?" "Yes, that''s what I said, a cock-and-spank-it." As the man was walking, and his dog ran away. The man asked a stranger, "Excuse me miss, can you hold my bum and fuck-it, while I get my cock-and-spank-it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy walks into a ice cream parlor to buy ice cream. Worker: Hello little boy, can I help you? Little boy: Yes, I want some chocolate ice cream, please. Worker: Sorry, we''re out of choclate. Little boy: Ok, I''ll have some...........chocolate. Worker: Once again, we''re out of chocolate, pick another flavor. Little boy: Hm................ I like chocolate! Worker thinks to himself. Worker: So boy, do you want some chocolate? Little boy: But there is no freakin chocolate! Worker: Exactly!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went for a 5 mile run today. 2 laps around yo mum!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady goes to a menswear shop to buy clothes for her husband. When she finds the clothes she likes she goes up to the counter and says, "I would like to buy these please." The man at the counter says, "Certainly, but you must sign this form." The lady says "Why?" but the man ignores her. The form reads as follows: Title: _____ Full Name: _______________________ She fills it in like this: Title: Ms Full Name: Jenny Hollows The man at the counter asks, "What does the ''Ms'' mean? Does it mean you are divorced?" and the woman responds with, "It is non specific. It is none of your business if I am divorced or not!" The man says "Wow! Men should get one like that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tomorrow is a boiling hot day, at 10 degrees Fahrenheit. The day after that is the same temperature, as well as the next and the next. Won''t these temperatures ever cool down?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ciao amico, desidero comprare un mazzo di banane. "Il compagno spiacente, questo un farmacista."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tommy was dying. His wife was with him, standing next to his bed. As he was drawing his last few breaths, he gasped, "Helen, I have one last request." "Of course, Tommy, what is it?" Helen asked softly. "Six months after I die," he said, "I want you to marry Louis." "But I thought you hated Louis," said Helen. With his final breath, Tommy said, "I do."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bernie has been ill for some months and then suddenly dies. As is the custom, his wife Sadie puts an advert in the ''deaths'' section of the Chronicle, but this advert is slightly unusual it states that Bernie died of gonorrhoea. Immediately, a close friend of Bernie rings Sadie to complain. "Sadie," he says, "you know full well that Bernie died of diarrhoea, not gonorrhoea, so why did you word the advert incorrectly?" "I looked after Bernie day and night for over 3 months," replies Sadie, "so of course I know he died of diarrhoea, but I thought it would be better for people to remember Bernie as a great lover rather than the big sh*t he was."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my pap was younger, his family didn''t have much money. One year for Christmas, his mother cut a hole in the front of his underwear so he would have something to play with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok, now the last time I did this, I got a lot of comments saying that there''s no point, and they only submit things they think is funny and blah blah blah. Well, anyways, I''m planning to do this.... again.. and by the way, I think it''d be extremely funny. Everyone, please give this a full smiley. Sooner or later, this is going to become the highest rated "joke". I figured it''d be extremely funny if the highest rated joke, wasn''t even a joke at all... Thanks a billion for your cooperation!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('knock knock, who''s there animal animal who? animal i kin git lots of stuff iffn i have ta money', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the store with a list of things he needs to buy for his wife, and as he is going in he sees a child with free kittens. He continues and buys the things on the list. On the way out he sees the free kittens again and no-one has taken any. So he takes his things to his car, comes backs and takes the SIX kittens that are left. He goes home brings in the groceries and then the six kittens. when his wife sees the six kittens she says "Why do you have six kittens, six kittens!" Husband calmly replys, "Six kittens hell, those are six pale bearers for your dead pussy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Inside i could hear a lot of bass noise pumping. I went outside to see what it was and i found out it was a drummer practicing. I went inside and told my family that the player made a mistake and said dammit. My brother said "I wonder which band it was?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a bar on a slow night and sat down. After a few minutes, the bartender asked him if he wanted a drink. He replied, "No thanks. I don''t drink. I tried it once, but I didn''t like it." So the bartender said, "Well, would you like a cigarette?" But the man said, "No thanks. I don''t smoke. I tried it once, but I didn''t like it." The bartender asked him if he''d like to play a game of pool, and again the man said, "No thanks. I don''t like pool. I tried it once, but I didn''t like it. As a matter of fact, I wouldn''t be here at all, but I''m waiting for my son." The bartender said, "Your only son, I''m guessing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two people were at a bar resting when one said, "I wish I was God." The other said, "Are you mad?" And the other says, "How could you say such a thing?" and the reply is, "I don''t want to have to lose all of Buddha''s fat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a nobody and nobody is perfect - therefore, I am perfect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now, my brother ALWAYS daydreams. He just can''t help it. He also likes getting me to feel bad. I just got a new IPod and my brother says whenever I put it in my ears that i have turned into a zombie. When we were out for a bike ride down through the park he wouldn''t stay left (We live in the southern hemisphere) and so other people on the track had to move to the right to get past. I screamed out to him to go left when i had my IPod in and he said "What." I said "Left, L-E-F-T. Gosh you can''t hear anything when you daydream." And his response was "No you can''t hear anything with your IPod in, I know what you said, you said FELT." I wonder who is the one that can''t hear?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Boo Boo who? I don''t know, but stop your crying!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Saint Peter asked the new arrival, "And what bad things did you do while you were on Earth?" The man thought a moment. "Well, I smoked marijuana, but you shouldn''t hold that against me because I didn''t inhale, and I had some extra-marital sex, but you shouldn''t hold that against me because I didn''t technically have "sexual relations". I lied some, but you shouldn''t hold that against me because I never committed perjury." Saint Peter looked concerned. "Okay, here''s the deal," said Saint Peter. "We''ll send you someplace very hot, but we won''t call it ''Hell''. You''ll be there for an indefinite time, but we won''t call it ''eternity,'' and you don''t need to ''abandon all hope'' upon entering, but don''t hold your breath waiting for it to freeze over!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a village, it was powerful and had the strongest warriors, one day, a tourist goes to them and says they were cowards, they yelled and beat him, but finally, the tourist said, "This book says that the Paccachu are selfish people who steal, and are cannibals." The villagers looking at the book scream and run around the village. One man however, looks at the book and laughs. The man stays where he is and doesn''t panic like his fellow village. The tourist, finally gathering enough courage asks him, "How come your not scared?" The man smirks and replies, "I can''t read."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Early one morning, the milkman was doing his rounds. He stopped at a house to ask for his monthly fee, only to find a small boy at the door slurping from a beer bottle, smoking a Havana cigar, and with his arm around what appeared to be a call-girl. Surprised, the milkman asked the boy if his parents were home. "Does it fucking look like it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman''s head. "Yech!" says the woman. "Get some toilet paper." "What for?" says the man. "He must be half-a-mile away by now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: John, where are the Great Plains? John: At the airport.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One there was a wrestler in a very, very light weight wrestling match. He only weighed 135 pounds and his opponent even less than that. He was just about to wrestle that day when his coach dragged him off the ring. "I need to speak with him," the coach called. "Why''d you take me out?" asked the wrestler, nervous. "What did I do?" "Calm down. I don''t think you''re fit to beat your opponent." "Yeah, well, I doubt it, Coach. I could carry that guy in the palm of my hand. He only weighs 85 pounds, maybe 90." "Yes, but he has a lot of muscle!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog in the sun? A Hot Dog!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a blond''s birthday, and to celebrate, he took his girlfriend out on a date; he dressed very nicely, in a tuxedo, sharp tie, and some nice soft pants. He went to his girlfriend, and said, "Do you have anything to say to me?" His girlfriend also a blonde, says, "Yeah, what up with the tie?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Melvyn and Max were left quite a large plot of land by their rich father. However, this caused the two sons much grief. For months they argued long and hard over how the land should be divided between them. The solution just wasn''t that simple, so they took the problem to their priest. "Father," said Melvyn, "can you please help us solve our problem?" As soon as he had heard their case, Father Murphy said, "Come back tomorrow and we''ll talk again." The next day, Melvyn and Max returned and the priest gave them his solution. He gave Max a coin and said, "You can toss the coin." "And you," said Father Murphy to Melvyn, "can call it, heads or tails. Whoever wins the toss will divide the land." "But that won''t work," said Max, "we''ll be right back from where we started." "But not," said Father Murphy, "if the one who wins the toss divides the land and the other one gets first choice!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Willy, full of hell, Threw his sister in the well. Their mother said when drawing water, "It''s so hard to raise a daughter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A child named Bob was running through the neighbor''s garden. "Hey!" shouted the neighbor, "I thought I told you not to let me catch you here again!" "Right!" replied the boy, "and you haven''t caught me yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jacky walked into his house from school crying; his mom saw him and said, "What''s wrong, Jacky?" Jacky replied, "I lost a quarter at school!" "There, there," replied his mother, "here''s another," handing him a quarter. Jacky cries even louder; this time his mother, upset, says, "What''s the matter now?" Jacky says, "I wish I said I lost a dollar!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy walks home an hour late to class, the teacher asks him, "Why are you so late?" The boy replies, "I stopped two boys from beating each other up." The teacher says, "That''s very nice; how did you do that?" The boy says, "I beat them both up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boss of a computer company walked up to one of his workers. "You''re fired!" exclaimed the boss. "I didn''t do anything!" replied the confused worker. The boss, happy with his answer, says, "I know. That''s why you''re fired!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a modern art museum, he sees a piece of art, and says, "Look how ugly that is, the nose is all out of shape, and look at those arms, so small and weak, I bet the person who created this is a wimp!" A security guard nearby says, "Sir, that''s a mirror."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day, Mr. Koch has to cross the river by ferry in order to get to work. Waking up late one morning, he dressed quickly, ran out the door and raced to the dock. The boat was several yards away, and stepping back and taking a mighty leap, Mr. Koch landed with a crash on the deck. "Made it!" he cried triumphantly. "So?" said one of the passengers, "What was the rush? The boat is coming in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Lwin was staring at the cage in the zoo, watching the great cat pace back and forth. "I wonder what the tiger would say if it could talk," he said to the zookeeper. The zookeeper replied, "It would probably say, ''Hey dummy, I''m a cheetah!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher said to the cooking class. "Tell me: what is the most important thing to put in a chocolate cake?" Faith quickly replied, "Your teeth!" The teacher said, "No, the ingredients." After correcting Faith, the cooking teacher said, "Who can tell me the best way to keep yogurt from spoiling?" Faith answered, "By eating it!."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, says Jim, "this match won''t light!" "Strange," says Ned,. "It worked okay this morning."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that when I wanted to take her picture I had to back up so far that I ended up in China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old pilot friends in the Air Force were talking about the day''s activities: Jenkins (first pilot): Did you hear? Captain Smith jumped out of a B-1 bomber, without a parachute, and he wasn''t hurt! Randy (Second Pilot): That''s impossible! The fall would have killed him! Jenkins (shakes his head): The bomber hadn''t taken off yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three men stranded on an island with nothing to eat, but a bowl of mac n cheese. The first guy says, "I have an idea, lets all swim to the other side and the first one there gets the bowl of mac n cheese". They all tie so the second guy says, "I have an idea, lets all swim back and the first one back gets the bowl of mac n cheese". They all tie again and the third guy says, "I have an idea, lets all go to sleep and the one with the best dream gets the bowl of mac n cheese". The next morning the first guy says, "I dreamed I ate all the mac n cheese in the world". The second guy says, "I dreamed I ate the bowl of mac n cheese". The third guy says, "Yankee Doodle went to town ridin on a pony while you dummies were asleep I ate the bowl of macaroni".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a caf and he said, "Could I have a breakfast". The cafe owner said, "Certainly, sir". He said, "But could you do it my way". The owner says, "What''s your way". He says, "I want a fried egg that''s been over-cooked so it''s got a rubbery texture so I can bounce it up and down on the floor, I want bacon that''s so brittle that when I stab my fork in it it springs around the room, I want baked beans that are cold in the middle, hot on the outside, I also want fried bread that''s dripping in grease with no crispy bits". The owner says, "I haven''t got time to do all that". The man says, "Well, you f*cking found time yesterday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Definition of alien-people from another country.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Route 66 says to the country road: Hey, man, you straight? Country road says: Heck no, I''m a byway!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newcomer in town goes to a bar, the bar manager notices he is new and says, "Sir, you''re new, and when you''re new, you have to drink a whole barrel of beer, then fix the crocodile''s sore tooth, then you give that nice lady right there a hug, or you can''t come to this bar again!" The newcomers says, "That''s ridiculous!" and leaves the bar. A couple minutes later, he comes back, he drinks the barrel of beer, then he goes into the backyard. After a couple screams of bloody murder, screeches, cries of pain, the newcomer returns all bloody and bruised. Then he goes up to the manager and says, "Okay, where''s the girl with the sore tooth?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was reading an article yesterday that was talking about the University of Michigan. They referred to it as MU. This got me to thinking.... What do they call the University of Florida?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Mexican called when he''s covered in dirt? A churro', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple who is having problems in their marriage decide to go on a talk show. The wife complains that her husband does not listen to her and is ungrateful. She blames this on her husband''s career. The host asks the man, "Has being in politics had any affect on your sex life?" Bill Clinton replies, "Mine''s great, how''s yours honey?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you sick of those stains on your carpet, the mess in the bathroom and kitchen? Are you worried that you will have to spend tons of money just to clean up what your loved one leaves behind? Now, you don''t have to worry because you can have your very own.......................... new personalized husband! The following is a list of the commands this product will perform: 1.It will clean up after itself. 2.It will stay out of your way. 3.It will keep the toilet seat down. 4.It will not talk back. 5.Worried about your kids? This baby can take care of anything! Does this sound too good to be true? We forgot to mention... It has an on/off switch! Note: This product sold for a limited time only. Batteries not included.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross an anteater and a monkey? A: I haven''t a goddamn clue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If ham is Canadian bacon, then what the heck do you Canadians call bacon?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always find myself arguing with my sister over who got up earliest in the morning. It''s ridiculous. I have to remind myself that I really don''t care. Usually this is what happens... (sister walks into the room) Her: Hey. What time did you get up this morning? Me: Um...around 9:00. Her: Oh. I woke up at 7:30. Me: Well, I woke up at 6 and didn''t get back to sleep until 8:00. It always takes me a while to get back to sleep... Her: Yeah, I got up a bunch of times this morning. The dog woke me up. Me: (under my breath) Dammit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One professor says your IQ measures how much you know. A scientist says your IQ measures how much information you are capable of learning. All I want to know is how long it will take me to get with your sister. I mean DAMN!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With iPhone, dialing contacts is a snap. Let''s say you wanted to contact your ex-girlfriend to let her know how badly she''s hurt you. Simply press her name, and the call is dialed. "Dammit, Rick, stop calling me!" Then, when another call comes in, simply place that call on hold and answer the second one. "This is Detective Hanson, from the Bay Area Police Department." To block the call, simply press ignore. iPhone is also the best iPod ever made. With it, you can listen to the song that was playing when she said you''d be together forever. *music* Then, you can use Google maps to locate the street where she''s moved away to. Simply touch the traffic button and iPhone tells you the best route to take to propose to her. Again, Apple''s iPhone, a revolutionary portable device that never leaves your side. And never sleeps with your cousin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Horton Hears a Ho 9. National Pleasure 2: Book of Secretions 8. I Am Legend...In Bed 7. The Suck It List 6. I Know Who Drilled Me 5. Scat-Atouille 4. Gush Hour 3 3. No Country for Old Balls 2. Alvin in the Chipmunks 1. Iron Man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NFL - National Farting Legends BC - Before Comedy BAD - Being A Dumbass BEG - Big Evil Grin BF - Begging Forgiveness AA - Admirable Alcoholics NASA - Never Associate Sex with Aircrafts AAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse ATLA - Another Three Letter Acronym BANANA - Being A Nuisance And Never Apologizing BFI - Bunch of F***ing Idiots BICBW - But I Could Be Wrong (used rarely) BMTIPG - Brilliant Minds Think In Parallel Gutters BSOD - Blue Screen Of Death CADET - Can''t Add, Doesn''t Even Try COTFLGOHAHA - Crawling On The Floor Laughing Guts Out And Having A Heart Attack (why don''t we see this more often?) CPF - Can Pigs Fly? (well can they???) CRAFT - Can''t Remember A F***ing Thing CRS - Can''t Remember S*** CYA - Cover Your Ass CUNT - Computer User Non-Technical and did you know... ACRONYM - Abbreviated Coded Rendition Of Name Yielding Meaning AKA Always Creating Random Odd Nicknames You Memorize', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher told one kid, "You''re going to flunk this subject because you haven''t finished your homework assignments." The kid said, "Good. I flunked all the other ones because I''m stupid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what big ears you have!" Wolf: "All the better to hear you with." Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what big eyes you have!" Wolf: "All the better to see you with." Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what big hands you have!" Wolf: "All the better to grab you with!" Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what a horribly big mouth you have!" Wolf: "All the better to eat you with!" Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what a big dick you have!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have no soul. yes, Thats why I''m an asshole! I have somethin'' up my ass and no, that ain''t no mole. I pick on everybody ''cause I''m a nobody. My girlfriend left me. Sometimes I go crazy and go out in the streets and yell "COME FUCK ME!" Everyone asks me, "Hey, whats up your ass!".Yeah I know I''ve sucked a lot of ass. The juices, oh, they are delicious as they come to pass. As I sit behind my computer and write jokes, my mother chokes On my cock. And I hear a knock. And who is it? Its my friend, a Gay. So, I send my mother away. I do it hardcore. I wont let him go ''til his ass is sore Even though my dick is inches-four. I have nothing to do ''cept suck on my dirty socks ''cause I am such a butt-fucker, my mother traps me in my room with heavy locks. Yes, thats me, I am KENTROCKS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she turned her Nike Shox into "Shocked Nikes"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick''s day? A. Regular Rocks are too heavy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde went to a store and saw Donuts that were sugar free, so she grabbed them and walked out of the store without paying. Security stopped her and asked, "Excuse me miss, but what do you think you are doing?" She said "Duh...I''m taking the free Sugar donuts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blonde in Wal-mart and she went up to a man. The blonde said, "Hi! Do you know what IDK means?" The man said, "I don''t know." Then the blonde said, "DARN! Nobody knows!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three men at a bar. One of them ducked and the other two fell down because they hit the bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 13999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a coconut tree and 4 animals. 1. A Elephant 2. A Monkey 3. A Tiger 4. A Mouse Which one of these animals is going to climb up the tree to get the banana? NONE! "There was a COCONUT TREE" "...the tree to get the BANANA"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Liners', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so good that even yo momma cheers for me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many Clowns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Paid Clowns - 5 Boys in school - 1000', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Daddy, there''s a man knocking on the door with a beard! "No wonder I didn''t hear him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re fat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you go to a black person''s yard sale? To get your stuff back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('....................................................................................................................................................................................................................;).....................................................................................................................................................................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- I want to give you something. - That''s what your mom said to me last night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- What''s your dad doing? - Your mom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- What do you wanna do next? - Your mom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- I told you to knock before you enter my room! - Your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (NULL, '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- What did you have for dinner last night? - Your mom. - ...and for dessert? - Your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Painter: "Y''are a dog." Apemantus: "Thy mother''s of my generation. What''s she, if I be a dog?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Demetrius: "Villain, what hast thou done?" Aaron: "That which thou canst not undo." Chiron: "Thou hast undone our mother." Aaron: "Villain, I have done thy mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('See that X? That''s your mum that is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? A. The same as the number of men, you sexist bastard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep an idiot in suspense? I''ll tell you tomorrow!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Kerryman emigrated from Ireland to England, thereby increasing the average IQ of both countries.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do mathematicians like national parks? Because of the natural logs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s purple and commutes? An Abelian grape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a really dramatic woman and a small man. The small man worked at a ballroom. The woman got dressed up all fancy and went to the ballroom. She went up to the man and said, "I hope there is something between us! And the little man said, "Me too! A continent!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gene Pitney dies, and his widow is told that the coffin would take a week if it was made from Oak - but only 24 hours from Balsa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard you tried to apply to work at a candy store. But they turned you down saying they already had enough air heads. Were you fat when you were born? Cause i think it all went straight to your head. Most people think outside the box. You still haven''t figured out how to get in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People from Mensa are said to understand any jokes without the need of any explaination. Meaning Mensans will be able to understand this joke here, though it is limpid that there aren''t any to be contemplated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The three wise men went to visit Jesus right after he was born. One wise man was extremely tall. He hit his head on the top of the door frame and said, ''''Jesus Christ!'''' Joseph looked at Mary and said ''''Write that down -- that''s way better than Clyde!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a doctor''s office. He has a sausage coming out of his ear, a waffle coming out of his nose, and bacon coming out of his other ear. He says worriedly, "Doc, what''s wrong with me?" The doctor replies, "You''re not eating properly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people - whether they are employed or not. 2) When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish. 3) If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22. 4) It''s easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down. 5) Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving. 6) Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do. 7) The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris. 8) Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: "Enter Password Now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop." Customer: "OK." Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?" Customer: "No." Tech Support: "OK. Right-click again. So you see a pop-up menu?" Customer: "No." Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?" Customer: "Sure. You told me to write ''click'' and I wrote ''click''." _____________________________________________ Tech Support: "OK. In the bottom left-hand side of the screen, can you see the ''OK'' button displayed?" Customer: "Wow! How can you see my screen from there?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it''s raining!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking through Beverly Hills selling door to door what he claimed to be the "Magic Elixir of Life". Of course, the police arrested him and ran a computer check of him. They found the man had quite a long record of such dealings. He was first arrested for that type of crime in 1660.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken do a poo right in front of a hole on a really busy footpath? Because he wanted people to slip on the poo and fall in the hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a chicken in a shell suit? An egg!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a chicken? A chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you go to the bathroom at a Beatles concert? There''s no John.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does PMS stand for? Potential Murder Suspect', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Alaska Alaska who? Alaska one more time, open the door', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING:DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU WANT TO LIVE ANYMORE OR EAT OR GO POTTY! A person named tommy had a wife named heather. Whenever Heather came home, She would bring something disguisting. When heather died in a war, Tommy was sad. He said to himself, I MUST DIE IN A TOILET INSTEAD!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Well both the girl and the emo bleed blood and both of them are annoying as hell in the process.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A vertical expression of a horizontal desire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man was sitting on a toilet with his solar power laptop, then his laptop fell in the toilet. He ran out of the bathroom screaming. The next person sat down to use the toilet. When he was done, he stood up looked at the toilet and screamed out of the bathroom. All the people in the bathroom ran out of the bathroom screaming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Both are attractive cost about $400 for 2 or 12 hours of fun. But right when you''re satisfied you get addicted to them, And keep wasting money replacing em.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If winners never quit, and quitters never win... Who was the fool who said, "Quit while you''re ahead".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, doctor. I think I need glasses. You sure do, sir. This is a flower shop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok Umm Uhh, Ahhh! Oh well, I just forgot what I was gonna say. Man I''m stupid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid named Ron lost his mom and dad. He went to the hospital to say, "I wanna baby! Waaaaaaaaaaa!" The nurse said, "You''re a male! Males don''t have babies! And you''re too young!" He died by biting his finger really hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I plan to be spontaneous - tomorrow. You know, if I looked like you, then I''d probably be plastering make-up on, too. You looked in a mirror lately? You''re just jealous - weighing 10 stone is a big achievement. You remind me of a person I once knew. He was called the Hulk. If you are wondering why I''m napping, it''s because you always want us to be wide awake. If I nap now, I''ll be awake later. Now let me sleep. Well, well, well. Looks like the latest circus freak just escaped. Why am I in free dress? Well, that''s the benefit of being the boss.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('. . . they only tell who''s left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so short, when she saw a set of stairs she said, "I never knew Mount Everest was here." Yo Momma so short, she called a dolls house a set of flats!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, that when she went on Biggest Loser, she she couldn''t get kicked out when she destroyed the stage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that, on the airplane, she smothered the person next to her to death - who was on the aisle seat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: Do you wanna hear a good joke? Amy: Yes! Me: Me too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0. No lightbulbs want to torture their own kind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Guess. Guess who? What, I don''t know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman''s child said, "Yo Mama, I hate you because you made me a boy, not a girl!" The woman said, "Wait! If you were a girl, someone would have to cut into you to get your baby!" The child said "Have you lost your mind?! I want the baby to know that she/he was from me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your dad has something wrong with his brain. After his appointment, the doctor says,"You have a spider, a termite, a pig, a cloud, a piece of poo, a tongue, and a camera in your brain so you''ll have to have no brain for years." Then the doctor took operation on his brain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Who''s There. Who''s there Who? I''m supposed to say Who''s there!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That guy looks like Jesus... and so does his friend.. did Jesus have a twin? "No, at least.. I dont think he did.. never thought about it" "Oh, well. Twins are awesome... hey, why is Jesus walking into our school? *gasp* what if he rapes us all?! JESUS IS A PEDO!" "Calm down, Jesus isn''t a pedo, he loves kids!" "Gee, that helps"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Funny Signs: Tailor''s Shop: Ladys have fits upstairs. Restaurant: People who find the waitresses rude ought to see the manager. Restaurant: We serve people like you as good food! Mall: The lift is being fixed today. We regret that for the next 24 hours you will be unbearable. Muffler Store: No appointment necessary, we will hear you coming. Restaurant: Today''s Special - Soup $5.00, Dessert $3.50, Children, $4.00. Zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, please give it to the guard on duty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a cat was being trapped be a evil dog. The evil dog said"barkity kalis hed resaw miop gas." The cat said "has that going to break the spppeeel?" Then the dog let the cat out. The next day, the cat trapped the dog. Then it happens every day with thhe same words.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not Catholic, but I gave up picking my belly button for lint. At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote. I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up and answer the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you are inventing something, the best way for it to work is to give it a job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The similarity of all the people that live is that they are alive and they are living.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Jesus was born on the computer age, he would just use the internet to spread his word unlike his time, he needs to journey across the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Freddy:May I please use the telephone for a while? Lady Flora:Yes, you may. Then Freddy saw a poster of Jollibee. There it says that the only telephone number you may dial in Rhode Island if you want to talk to them is: 626-999-626. Freddy called that number. Freddy:626-999-626. Jollibe Customer Service:Hello, Jollibee customer service here. What do you want to order. Freddy: One piece Chicken McDonalds and any coffee by Figaro please. Then Freddy ran away because he was afraid what the customer service will say.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Maria went to the telephone booth to make her second insult call. She payed the telephone booth owner. Then she dialed: ABC-DEF-GHI. "Hello! May I take your order, please?" the Figaro delivery service said. "I want to order all the kinds of sushi you have, and please don''t forget the chopsticks." Maria replied. "Looks like we have another insult call."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is really insulting when someone from the Greenwich restaurant see you eating a pizza from Pizza Hut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking down the road and saw a sign which read, "SIDEWALK AHEAD CLOSED. PLEASE USE OTHER SIDE OF ROAD". Oooh, it made me cross!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than going to school? Having play time every day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the limping man sit on a scorpion? He thought that it would be "pinched"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s a cannibal? A: dod dn p s,o uosd ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Oh I really love my husband he''s so cute and kind and everything! I will never do anything to hurt him. Jack: Looks like you really love your husband, teacher. Cara: It looks pretty obvious. After lunchtime the bell rang and everyone went to their classroom. When their teacher came... Teacher: Who keeps putting this ball pen on my table?! I will spill the ink to the one who keeps putting this thing. Cara: Ummm teacher a while ago your husband came and put that ball pen on your table, and he told me to remind you that that was the ball pen that you were looking for since last month.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the morning elephants put springs on their feet and jump around the jungle. Now the most fearsome sound to a monkey is "Boing Boing"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so stupid when she heard the doorbell she opened the microwave and said "Hello???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a break at work, John and Steve are chit-chatting about what happened the previous night: John: "OK, well last night the wife and I decided to go see a play. I waited for 10 minutes downstairs for her to get ready, and we got on our way. So, we''re driving down the street, when suddenly a car from oncoming traffic swerves into our lane! I quickly gripped the wheel, and turned out of the way. I hit the guardrail, so my car spun out, took 2 flips in the air, and landed in the ditch at the side of the road. But - guess what? My wife and I crawled out of the car WITHOUT a scratch. What do you think?" Steve: "I...I just can''t believe it." John: "I know, right? Isn''t it unbelievable how we made it out alive and absolutely fine?" Steve: "No..not that. I just can''t believe that it only took your wife 10 minutes to get ready!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They had quite a scare in Washington, DC, today. Apparently, President Obama was meeting with some potential cabinet nominees and someone noticed a suspicious looking document on the table that no one had ever seen before. Turns out it was just a tax form, but it gave them quite a fright. - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe figured out a way to remember his wife''s birthday and their wedding anniversary. He opened an account with a florist and told him to send flowers to his wife on those dates, along with a note signed, "Your loving husband." His wife was thrilled by the attention, and all was great until one anniversary. Joe came home, saw the bouquet, kissed his wife, and said, "Nice flowers. Where''d you get them?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The thing you need to focus on in your 20''s is not getting a bad tattoo. You don''t want to be 40 and going, "No, dude, it was different back then - everybody loved SpongeBob."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have an 18-year-old; her name is Alexis. I chose that name because if I hadn''t had her, I''d be driving one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The reason grandparents and children get along so well is really quite simple: They have a common enemy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Summer was over and the teacher was asking the class about their vacations. She turned to little Johnny and asked what he did over the summer. "We visited my grandmother in Minneapolis, Minnesota," he said. "That sounds like an excellent vocabulary word," the teacher said, "Can you tell the class how you spell that?" Little Johnny thought about it and said, "Come to think of it, she lives in Ohio."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing. A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready. "All set back here, Captain," came the reply, "except one lawyer who is still going around passing out business cards."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A waitress at a restaurant that David worked at had a change of clothes stolen from the break room. To make matters worse, she''d planned on wearing them to the Christmas party. As a brand-new employee, David knew none of this backstory, so you can imagine his surprise when the found a note on the employees'' community board saying: "It has been two weeks since the Christmas party, and I still have not found my clothes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Real headline: "Air Traffic Controllers Can Apply for Job in Braille"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ben never saw action on his high school football team. One day, the assistant coach gave him a pep talk. "Remember, Ben," he told him, "everyone on this team has an important role. There is no ''I'' in ''team''." "True," said the boy. "But there is a ''Ben'' in ''bench''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pressure of a workday can bring out the weirdness in people. Possibilities for stupidity are endless. Here are some real conversations: Boss: "You make too many mistakes! You''re not very consistent." Cube Dweller: "Well, you can''t be consistent all the time." Cashier: "And what form of payment will you be using today?" Customer: "Money." Office Manager: "Where were you yesterday?" Peon: "I was at my cousin''s funeral." Office Manager: "Why? Did she die?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For those with jobs that require sitting at a computer all day who don''t want to spend the money for those fancy exercise machines, here is a little secret for building arm and shoulder muscles. Three days a week is best. Begin by standing (in your cubicle works well) with a five pound potato sack in each hand. Extend your arms straight out to your sides and hold them there as long as you can. After a few weeks, move up to ten pound potato sacks and then fifty pound potato sacks, and finally get to where you can lift a one hundred pound potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute. Next, start putting a few potatoes in the sacks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two mice were waiting for the right time to get out of their mouse hole, because a cat was meowing on the other side. After a few minutes, the meowing stopped and was replaced by the "woof, woof!" of a dog. Thinking it was okay to come out, the mice crawled out of their hole and were pounced on by the cat. After its meal, the cat said, "I always knew learning a second language would come in handy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old couple had been married for fifty years. To celebrate their fiftieth anniversary, the man took the woman on a trip, and they were to stay at an upscale hotel. When they got there, the woman told the bell boy, "This is an awful hotel. Why is it upscale? No windows, no bathroom, no air conditioning." "But, madam!" the bell boy protested. "Don''t ''but madam'' me," the lady said. "This is one of the worst hotels I''ve ever even tried to stay at. I''m going to report it to your manager." "But, madam!" the bell boy persisted, "this isn''t your room, this is the elevator."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This comes from an elderly man that spoke with me in a waiting room once. "I don''t like these places," he said, "They''re always trying to find out what you''re thinking. "But I was nifty, I got around her, see. I had a way around it." He looked at me and continued. "She asked me if I was hearing voices, and I said ''Yes, ma''am, I hear you talking to me right now.'' And when she asked if I felt like hurting myself or anybody else, I said ''No m''dear, but I really am going to hurt the next person who asks me that question.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy at work argued with everybody that his pink oxford shirt was actually "salmon." Finally, human resources brought in a grizzly bear to settle the dispute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you tell the headline by the satirical publication "The Onion" from these real headlines? "Couple recalls war years, 63 years of marriage.'''' "Gun who killed officer said to have mental problems." "Smokers asked to keep butts off beach." "Volunteers needed to help abuse victims." "Study finds link between red wine, letting mother know what you really think." "Orleans seeks tenants for new jail." Answers: 1. "Sudbury Town Crier" (Massachusetts) 2. "Times-Standard" (Eureka, California) 3. "San Diego Union-Tribune" 4. "Santa Barbara News-Press" 5. "The Onion" 6. "Daily News" (Batavia, New York)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('whats hitlers least favourite planet ? - jewpiter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde woman in Georgia bought a magnolia tree from a local nursery but, after only a few months, its leaves shrivelled and it appeared to be on its last legs. She took some leaf samples back to the nursery and demanded an explanation. "Oh, I know exactly what''s wrong with your magnolia tree, ma''am," said the manager. "Good," she replied. "What is it?" "Autumn!" he said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Henry: Oh my enemies makes me so mad I want to kill them! Phil: I can help you with that. Henry: How? Phil: First, go to the internet cafe. When you are already using the computer make a folder and name it "Your Enemies". After that, delete the folder. Go to the recycle bin and delete the folder again. It should say "Do you really want to delete "Your Enemies"?". Click yes. Now you don''t have your enemies any more. They''re deleted out of this world. There''s no way you can get them back unless you create them. Henry: Oh! Now I can get rid of them; but what if I decide to create them again? How can I create them again? Phil: There''s no way you can create them again, Henry. To create them, of course they need to be born. You said that all females are your enemies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The judge summoned the opposing lawyers to his chambers. Confronting the lawyers, the judge said: "Each of you has presented me with a bribe." The lawyers squirmed uncomfortably. "Mr. Hearnski, you gave me $15,000. Mr. Joy, you gave me $10,000." The judge then handed a check to attorney Hearnski. "Now then, I''m returning $5,000 to Mr. Hearnski and we''ll decide this case solely on its merits!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Michael Jackson and Speed Racer have in common? They both have a monkey and a small boy in their trunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every man believes every woman''s ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once. While a recent sociological study verified this, what men don''t realize is that, in women''s fantasies, one man cooks while the other cleans!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a couple who were big over-spenders. They always dreamed of spending holidays in Hawaii, but were never able to save any money to do so. One day they came up with an idea - each time they had sex, they would put $20.00 bill into a piggy bank. They bought the piggy, and followed that procedure for about a year. After that time, they decided that there was enough money for their dream vacation and broke the piggy bank. The husband looked at their savings and said: "Isn''t it strange - each time we had sex, I put $20.00 into the piggy, but I see tons of $50.00 bills and a few $100.00 bills." The wife replied, "Do you think that everybody is as stingy as you are?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a woman who absolutely loved the music of Billy Joel and Paul McCartney. She loved them so much she decided to have their images tattooed on her body. She went to a tattoo parlor and told the artist she wanted Billy Joel tattooed on her left thigh, and Paul McCartney tattooed on her right thigh. When the job was completed, the artist gave her a mirror to inspect his work. She exclaimed that neither of the images looked like what they were supposed to be. The artist said let''s get another opinion. He went out to the street and asked a drunk to come in and assist with a little problem. There sat the woman, with her legs apart, and the artist asked the drunk what he saw. He replied, "Well...that looks like Billy Joel on her left, Paul McCartney on her right...and that looks like Willie Nelson in the middle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was often said that if an African American was ever voted in to be the President of the United States, that would be the the day that pigs fly. 100 days after President Barack Obama is in office, swine flu.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was in town looking for a little something from the ladies. A cab driver gave him an address and told him he could find anything he wanted there. When the young man arrived, he saw a door with a small panel on it. He knocked and the panel slid open. A female voice asked what he wanted. "I want to get screwed," said the man. "OK, but this is a private club. Slide twenty bucks in the slot as an initiation fee," answered the voice. The man slid twenty dollars in the slot, the panel closed, and ten minutes passed. Nothing happened. He began to pound on the door, and the panel slid open. "Hey," exclaimed the man, "I want to get screwed!" "What?" said the voice, "Again?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Maths teacher asks a blonde girl what comes after 69?" Essex girl replies "you wash your face and rinse your mouth DUH...!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Those Wonderful Church Bulletins. The Fasting and Prayer Conference includes meals. Ladies, don''t forget the rummage sale. It''s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands. The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been cancelled due to a conflict. Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered. The Associate Minister unveiled the church''s new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Press Release Scare At Adelaide F.C. (Football Club) Headquarters Training at West Lakes was delayed nearly two hours late this morning, after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the ground. Initially the Club thought it was a prank! Team manager Neil Craig immediately suspended training, while police and the ASIO (Australia Special Investigations Office) were called to investigate. After a complete analysis, SA Police forensic experts determined that the white substance, unfamiliar to most of the players, was in fact, the goal line. Practice will resume this afternoon after police and ASIO decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you have the swine flu? You wake up in pigtails and then break out in rashers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Swine flu may affect your hearing: you could get crackling in one ear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top 10 Signs of Having Swine Flu 1. Tears flow from your small eyes during a nightly bedtime reading of Three Little Pigs. 2. A small curly tail is growing at the top of your tailbone. 3. When called to dinner, you head directly to the trough in the backyard. 4. Your thumbs and big toes are missing. 5. You apply mud instead of suntan lotion on a sunny day. 6. You develop a liking for truffles. 7. At each meal you literally lick your plate clean. 8. You emit short snorts between sentences. 9. When friends visit you, they remark, "Man, this place is a pigsty!" 10. Fever accompanied by the smell of bacon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear there''s now a sine flu as well. Someone on the news was going off on a tangent about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so ugly when she passed a horror movie filming the camera man said "Hey! No breaks, get back on set."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:Why can peter pan fly? A:Because if you got hit in the peter with a pan you''d fly too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so stupid she drowned in the shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two eggs sitting on a kitchen table, when one sees a whisk. He says to his friend, "Ooh, what''s that?" The friend replies, "Beats me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a pool table green? Because if someone racked your balls you''d be green too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid was at school when his male teacher was passing out alot of homework. The teacher was named bob. Mr. Bob said ''''no help from your mom''''. The kid named josh ask ''''why can''t we have help from are mom ''''.Mr.bob replied '''' your mom probally be very busy tonight so I will call your mom to make sure you want''''.So he decided not to ask his mom for help on his homework. when he got home Mr.bob called his mom. She went to her room. When she got in there was a loud noise and he went in there to see what was the matter.mr.bob was sitn there with his mom.And affter a while mr.bob said ''''did you finish your homework''''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than a brunette building a fire under water? A blonde trying to put it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy is walking along a dirt road when he stumbles upon a redneck lying on the ground with his ear in the dirt. "Are you alright? What are you doing?" the man asks but gets no answer at all. The redneck doesn''t even acknowledge that he is there. So after a while of silence the man asks again, "Can I help you sir?" The redneck replies this time. "Ford pick-up truck, blue, 18 inch rims, two passengers, female driver." "Wow! You can tell all that by listening to the ground!" the man says. "NO" The redneck replies with a shocked look on his face "The bitch ran over me 10 minutes ago!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes into a tattoo parlour and tells the tattoo artist that she wants a tattoo of a turkey on her right thigh just below her bikini line. She also wants him to put "Happy Thanksgiving" under the turkey. So the guy does it and it comes out looking really good. The woman then instructs him to put a Santa tattoo with "Merry Christmas" up on her left thigh. So the guy does it and it comes out looking good, too. As the woman is getting dressed to leave, the tattoo artist asks, "If you don''t mind, could you tell me why you had me put such unusual tattoos on your thighs?" She says "I''m sick and tired of my husband complaining all the time that there''s nothing good to eat between Thanksgiving and Christmas!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man approached the window of a movie theater with a chicken on his shoulder and asked for two tickets. "Who''s the other ticket for?" the ticket girl asked. "For my pet chicken," he said, pointing to the bird. "I''m sorry," the girl tells him, "but we don''t allow animals in the theater." The man walked around the corner of the building, and stuffed the chicken into his pants. He returned to the ticket window and bought a ticket, entered the theater, and sat down. The chicken started to get too hot, so the man, figuring it was okay because it was dark, unzipped his pants and let the chicken stick its head out. The woman seated next to him looked down in horror. She nudged her friend Amanda and whispered, "Amanda! This man next to me just unzipped his pants!" Amanda replied, "Oh, don''t worry about it. Just ignore him. If you''ve seen one, you''ve seen them all." The woman whispered back, "I know, I know, but this one''s eating my popcorn!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Outside the Bristol Zoo, in England, there is a parking lot for 150 cars and 8 coaches, or buses. It was manned by a very pleasant attendant with a ticket machine charging cars 1 (about $1.40) and coaches 5 (about $7). This parking attendant worked there solid for all of 25 years. Then, one day, he just didn''t turn up for work. "Oh well", said Bristol Zoo Management, "we''d better phone up the City Council and get them to send a new parking attendant . . ." "Actually," said the Council, "that parking lot is your responsibility." "Surely," said Bristol Zoo Management, "the attendant was employed by the City Council, wasn''t he?" "Err . . . NO!" insisted the Council. Sitting in his villa somewhere in Spain, is a bloke who had been taking the parking lot fees, estimated at 400 (about $560) per day at Bristol Zoo for the last 25 years. Assuming 7 days a week, this amounts to just over 3.6 million ($7 million)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I''ve got to take you in, pal. You''re obviously drunk." Our wasted friend asked, "Officer, are ya absolutely sure I''m drunk?" "Yeah, buddy, I''m sure," said the copper. "Let''s go." Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said, "Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They sat in the comer of Mulligan''s refurbished bar, opposite a huge new floor-to-ceiling mirror. Suddenly Pat spotted their reflection across the room. "Mick! Mick!" he whispered. "Don''t look now, but there''s two fellas over there that''s the image of us!" "In the name of God," said Mick, spotting the reflection, "and they''re wearing identical clothes, too." "That does it," said Pat. "I''m gonna buy ''em a drink." Just as Pat rose from his seat, Mick stopped him. "Sit down, Pat! One of ''em''s coming over here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly and somewhat hard-of-hearing man was sitting in a stylish downtown attorney''s office as his lawyer handed him his will. "Your estate is very complex," said the lawyer, "but I''ve made sure that all of your wishes will be executed. Due to the complexity, my fee is $4500." Just then, the phone rang and the lawyer got involved with a long call. Thinking the lawyer had said "$500," the old man wrote out his check and left. When she got off the phone and realized the old man''s mistake, the lawyer ran after him down the stairs and into the parking lot just as he drove away. Feeling frustrated, the lawyer looked at the check and decided to accept the situation philosophically. "Oh well," she said to herself, "$500 for half an hour''s work isn''t bad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a compilation of actual Church Bulletins and Service bloopers: * Our next song is "Angels We Have Heard Get High". * Jean will be leading a weight-management series Wednesday nights. She''s used the program herself and has been growing like crazy! * Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones. * The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir. * The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Shirley Green, who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Y''know - just when I think I''ve finally figured out women, I wake up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What I saw, it was burned into my mind forever. "Well, that explains the red markings on your scalp."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She was only a whisky maker''s daughter, but he loved her still.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One stormy night an English, Irish and Scottish man were walking home and had no shelter so at the top of this big hill they found this haunted house. They were all freaked out and hesitated to go in. Eventually, the English man went in and found a five pound note sitting on the table and he goes to lift it when all of a sudden the ghost of Mickey Mouse appears and says, "I''m the ghost of Mickey Mouse; lift that fiver and I''ll haunt your house." Next the Scottish man went in and saw the fiver, but before he could lift it the ghost of Mickey Mouse appeared again and said, "I''m the ghost of Mickey Mouse; lift that fiver and I''ll haunt your house." Finally, the Irishman went in and lifted the fiver and Mickey Mouse popped out again and said, "I''m the ghost of Mickey mouse, lift that fiver and I''ll haunt your house." Then the Irishman said, "I''m the ghost of Donald Duck; I''ll lift this fiver and I''ll run like fuck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A store owner makes a sign to hang in his window. FRESH FISH SOLD HERE A critic walks into the store and asks the owner if he would like his store critiqued. He says yes. "Well, first thing''s the sign," says the critic. "''Fresh Fish Sold Here''? Well, where else would you sell ''em?" FRESH FISH SOLD "''Fresh Fish Sold''. What else would you be doing, giving ''em away?" FRESH FISH "''Fresh Fish''. Kinda obvious. Would you sell rotting fish?" FISH "''Fish''. People walk by, they see a fish in the window. What do they think you sell, chicken?" -', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was my first vacation out of my home country - I was going to Australia. It was also going to be my first time on a plane, so I got a nice, large, purple bag with one of the long, pull-out handles and wheels on the bottom so you can pull it around. It was a new experience for me! But, when I got to Australia, I watched the carousel go around and I saw nothing but the long handle. I even checked the sticker, and it was from my bag. I was furious. I walked up to a woman who worked at the airport and said, "Explain this to me!" She looked at the handle. "Are you sure that''s your bag?" she replied. "Yes!" I cried, "but I''m missing most of it!" "Well, did you leave it unattended at some point?" "I guess I must''ve!" "Okay, now we''ve nicked it. Tell me what it looks like so we can get it back." More angry than before, I cried, "Well, it''s got a long black handle!" The woman wrote that down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three friends sat down in the new cafe'' in town. They began to have casual conversation, and eventually jokes were brought up. One of them said, "Oh, did you hear the joke about the guy in hell drinking coffee and eating a doughnut?" Before anyone could answer, though, the man across the room told the waitress, "I''ll have some coffee and a doughnut"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A special kind of firework with very bright colors and little smoke was accidentally discovered when a man tried to make the atomic bomb safer. That defeats the original purpose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone knows that common phrase, meaning, ''COME ON, I NEED TO GET LUCKY!'' Well, whenever I need to get lucky, I say, Daddy needs a new pair o'' pants! (Come on, winter is coming!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jersey girls aren''t trash; trash gets picked up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long does a black woman take to do a shit? 9 months', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every year the class of Ms. Marquez has a class urine contest. The goal is to be the one to pee the most. If you do, you win. There are four contestants. One is from Japan, another is from the United States, the next is from Mexico, and the last, but definitely not the least, is from the Philippines. The Japanese filled a gallon with urine. The audience clapped. The American filled five big tanks of urine. The audience clapped and shouted. The Mexican filled five big tank and a gallon with urine. The audience clapped, shouted, and danced. Here is the Filipino. When th Filipino finished his turn, there were no one who clapped, shouted, nor danced, because the whole classroom was filled with urine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a senior at Xxxxxx State University in Mixxxxxxx, I often engage women psychology majors in heated discussions about male-female relationships. Once, my friend Shelly and I got into a hot debate about whether men or women make the larger sacrifice of their respective gender characteristics when they get married. To my surprise, Shelly agreed with me that men give up far more than women. "You''re right, Steve," she said. "Men generally give up doing their cleaning, their cooking, their grocery shopping, their laundry . . ."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Farrah Fawcett died and went to heaven. At the gates, St.Peter greeted her. "Hello, and welcome. You have lived a life full of prosperity and love. You have given millions around the world entertainment with your acting. Now I will provide you with one wish for the Earth before you enter Heaven. What is it?" Farrah thought for a minute, but answered, "I would like all the children in the world to be safe." The next day, Michael Jackson died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This poem is for every guy who has a girl who wants poetry and songs devoted entirely to them ;) ( Sung to row row row my boat ) Suck, suck, suck my cock suck my god damn cock blow it hard you fucking ''tard suck my god damn cock! Please, if this offends you don''t read it, no need to comment on how horrid it is, this is not every one''s brand of humor . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone approaches you to say hi and your immediate response is, "You bet I am!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t there more Kenyans in the Olympics? All the rest couldn''t outrun the slave traders!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple was attending Mass. About halfway through, the wife leans over and says to her husband, ''I just let out a silent fart; what do you think I should do? He replies, ''Put a new battery in your hearing aid.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sir Lancelot was losing patience with Lady Guinevere. He had fought battles; he had jeopardized his reputation; he had ruined his friendship with King Arthur. But it was all worthwhile just to have this time with his lovely lady. They had run away for a little while, but Lancelot was growing angry because Guinevere was spending all her time on a stupid crossword puzzle. When she raised her quill to write in another word, he snapped. He couldn''t take it any more. He yelled in a harsh tone, "GIVE ME THE PEN GUIN!" After that, she thought he had lost his mind, and left him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde mother runs her own daycare business. She has two of her own kids and has about 15 kids in her daycare. One day the blonde takes the children to the park to play, when a brunette walks up and notices the blonde and her daycare kids. She goes to the blonde and asks her, "Are all these kids yours?" The blonde replies, "No, I have two of my own." The brunette proceeds to ask which two are the blonde''s. The blonde laughs and says. "My kids go to the YMCA daycare center." The brunette asks in a puzzled voice, "Why are they there when you run your own daycare?" The blonde looks at her and says, "Because I can''t afford what I charge."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma''s so fat when she jumped off the ship a sailor yelled, "Land Ahoy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This couple is walking to a bank, and they''re trying to get at a savings account, when suddenly a bank robber comes in. He tells everyone to get against the wall, then he told the banker to put all the money in the bag. He then walks up to a man, and said, "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man replies, "Yes." Bang, he shoots him. He gos to another man; "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man gives no answer, then the robber puts the gun up to his head and said, "Did you see me rob this bank?" "Yes," the man replies. The robber shoots him, then he goes up to the couple and once again said, "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man replies, "No, but my wife did."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried for years to snap my thumb and finger together - and suddenly it clicked!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS: (1) They live here. You don''t. (2) If you don''t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That''s why they call it ''fur''-niture. (3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people. (4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don''t speak clearly. Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they (1) eat less, (2) don''t ask for money all the time, (3) are easier to train, (4) normally come when called, (5) never ask to drive the car, (6) don''t hang out with drug-using people; (7) don''t smoke or drink, (8) don''t want to wear your clothes, (9) don''t have to buy the latest fashions, (10) don''t need a gazillion dollars for college and (11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you shut up a crying baby? Finish the job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you think god gets stoned? I do. Look at the platypus! -Robin Williams', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a blonde has been in your fridge? There is lipstick on the cucumber', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Goodman was a moderately successful stockbroker who dreamed of making the big money some day. He took his friend out for a drive, and he chose the route carefully in order to impress on him the possibilities of the brokerage business. "Look at that yacht," he said as they drove slowly past a marina. "That belongs to the senior partner at Merrill Lynch. The head of Goldman, Sachs, owns that one over there, and look at that huge yacht out there - that''s the pride and joy of the top seller at Prudential-Bache." His friend was silent. Goodman turned to look at him and saw a pained look on his face. "What''s the matter?" Goodman asked. "I was just wondering," his friend said, "why aren''t there any customers'' yachts?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police man arrested a MBA marketing girl.... GIRL: I''M not involved in sex COP:Then what are you doing? GIRL: I am selling condoms and offering a free a trial', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black priest? Holy Crap!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time in a land where everyone updates there Facebook status every 5 seconds, there was a young girl named Isabel. When Isabel was reading her cereal box, she thought "Oh.Maybe I should check my Facebook." So Isabel walked over to her Mac and sat down. She typed in Facebook.com and clicked enter. But when she tried to sign in, it said "cookies required." "Okay." Isabel said so she walked into the kitchen and over to the cupboard and looked for some cookies. But she did not find any. So Isabel went to Hyvee with her mom and bought some cookie mix. 10 minutes later she had some cookies.So Isabel got her dads hand saw and sawed the Mac in half. Afterwards, she stuffed every single crumb of cookie inside that computer,and duct taped it back together', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a large group of mexicans who made a club called the I love Mayonnaise Club. And they made this club days before the titanic set sail. And on the titanic there was a large, large case of mayonnaise. And later when the titanic sank, this group was very sad so they formed a holiday called "Sink-o Da-Mayo"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I ever need a good laugh....Yo Momma', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what George W. bush thinks during his cabinet meetings. Hmmm...what does the w stand for? Wait... there isn''t even a cabinet in here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following is a list of the U.S. deaths in certain places. September 11: 2,752 War on Terror: 4,344 We beat ourselves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Dennis What is Den? My name is Dennis What is Den? Den is like a mini barnyard or a mini house Oh!Anyways who are you? I am Dennis!! I forgot what den is again. ARGH!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does PPSH-41 stand for? It is:Perfectly and Painfully and Stubborn Hallucination for(4) one(1)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A male teenager went out to his favorite band concert "The Hearts of Heaven". They have very cool songs but their singer''s life would end the very next night. The next night, they made their next concert which is in the capital of the teenager''s country. It wasn''t very far. He went to the concert and enjoyed the songs, but one made him a bit twitchy. It was called "Take my heart out". The song made the teenager go to the singer''s house, and take his heart out. All the other band members tried to stop him but he also got their hearts. He put them in a small box. Later the police found out that one of the windows of the house was stained with blood. They went in and took a look. He saw that the people in the house got their hearts out. 2 weeks later, they were sent to the hospital. During the operation, the doctor said, "The cause of this is the song "Take My Heart Out." I suppose should I take that suspect through a therapy test."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We all know the world war II games right?And they also have the Thompson gun which belongs to the Americans and British. There is a 2nd meaning. (Capital letters make for Thompson not just the beginning words.If you know what I mean) Thompson means:Theories Having Oatmeal Mayhem.Prefers to Sadness because Oatmeal is Numb. Capital letters are the letters of Thompson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there Z Z who? Z taxi is leaving! I don''t speak Italian or French or anything of your so-called "Special" Language!*Slams door*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many exciting people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, because they are VERY excited, one of them cracks the lightbulb and another throws the screw at their neighbor''s house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology and mixed emotions when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, that''s a bunch of crap; I bet you can''t tell me anything that will make me happy and sad at the same time." She said, "You have the biggest penis of all your friends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman is walking down the street with a pack of menstrual pads in her hand, after buying them from the store. A homeless guy comes by and kindly asks for money. The woman says she has no change. So, the guy being a smartass says, "Can I have some of that bread in your hand?" The woman being a bigger smartass says, "Meet me tomorrow and I will give it to you with some ketchup on it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ll never guess what just happened! I just got arrested for punching a black woman. It wasn''t my fault it was my mom''s. We were in Home Depot when she told me to go find a Black & Decker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, I was about to tell my ''Micky Mouse is Mad'' joke to my friends, when I get to the part "Mickey Mouse was in the Divorce court..." One of my friends interrupted me and started yelling... "But why is it Mickey Mouse? Why not Steamboat Willie? Or George?" Losing interest, I noticed there was a post-it on my backpack. I threw it to my second friend. He opened it and read ''Fluffy?'', and threw it to my first friend droning on and on and on and on and on and.... He said this. "Why is Steamboat Willie the same as Mickey Mouse? Steamboat Willie is a boat driver and Mickey Mouse does NOTHING. He just sits around being all-" then he got the post-it. "FLUFFY? He just sits around being FLUFFY?" We laughed than I said I''d post this on Wocka. I got home and started typing ''One day, I was about to tell my ''Micky Mouse is Mad'' joke to my friends....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what did one gay say to the other when they broke up? ''''YOU''RE SUCH A PAIN IN THE A*S''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The "bishop" came to our church today The was a fucken impostor He never once moved diagonally', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This 4-year-old kid is sitting on the couch watching T.V. silently, with an angry look on his face. After a while, his mother notices this and asks him, "Why the long face?" "Well, Mommy, I know that you invited everyone to your wedding. You invited grandpa, grandma, my uncle, your friends and all . . ." "So what''s the problem, Sweety?" his mother asks. "WELL, WHY DIDN''T YOU INVITE ME?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and my friend were IMing and it was like this... Me:BRB Him: kake Me:heh Him:I LIKE KAKE Me:i like 3.1415926535 Him:Pi >:0', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Good Grades 2 Social life 3 Adequate Sleep. Pick Two Welcome to College...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, have you got a ladder? Yes; why? I have to write an essay on an elephant!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny comes home from school, and shouts, "Mother!" Mother calls from upstairs, "If you wish to speak to me, come upstairs so you don''t have to shout." When Johnny gets upstairs, she says, "Now, what did you want to say to me?" "Just that I trod in some dog do, but it seems to have gone now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were cockroaches in the corner of a hotel when four people saw it and reacted differently. The hotel manager saw the cockroaches, and said "Can somebody please clean these up? It''s ruining my hotel." A customer saw it and said "Don''t the hotel facilities know how to maintain this hotel clean and free of gross creatures? I''m out of here." A movie star saw it and said "Eeewww, crochy! Go away!" Then a beggar outside saw it and said "Is that dinner? For me?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('21st Century... Our communication - Wireless Our dress - Topless Our telephone - Cordless Our cooking - Fireless Our youth - Jobless Our food - Fatless Our labour - Effortless Our conduct - Worthless Our relation - Loveless Our attitude - Careless Our feelings - Heartless Our politics - Shameless Our education - Valueless Our follies - Countless Our arguments - Baseless Our boss - Brainless Our Job - Thankless Our Salary/Allowance - Very less !!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent review, The Weird Gamers rated popular game, Grand Theft Auto IV 3.14 out of 10. They said it was pirated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Chinese family of four was eating fried rice for dinner. As always, the half-blind father was last. Thinking that nobody will care if he throws his food out, he does so, as he sees an empty garbage can. The next morning his wife says to him: "Honey, while you were eating dinner I took the garbage out, and now some ee-diot left crap in the box. Please clean it up"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JOHNNY : Hey billy, you like Fishsticks? BILLY : Yeah... JOHNNY : So, you put Fishsticks in your mouth? BILLY : Yeah why? JOHNNY : What are you Billy, a gay fish?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my friend and I were talking (for real this time) at lunch and he told a joke. Him: So this kid found beer under his brother''s bed and before he went to school he drank like 5 bottles and was drunk. Then his teacher asked him what 7+7 was and he was like 302 and the teacher said it was right in a slurred voice. Then the conversation continues and I tell some of boodler''s and Newf''s and Drunky''s and alex1234''s (hey, it''s not illegal) and after a while I take a swig of my milk carton, slam it down like a drunk and say 302. My friend was like, "Huh?" then breaks out laughing a belly laugh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how we earn little icons next to our names for the points we get for being active on Wocka? They should do that on Facebook. Only backwards. The longer you are totally inactive, the higher level symbols you get.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DMV jokes get old really fast. Unlike the DMV. You have to go through a special line to become old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good morning is a contradiction in terms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE! DUH! Aw c''mon, how many times are you gonna fall for this?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an intelligent man in America? A tourist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Donkey meets a Buick at the High Road. "Hello car", the Donkey says. "Hello donkey", the Buick replies, when suddenly the Donkey begins to cry. "Oh my" the Buick says. "Why are you crying"? "Well, when i now call you car, you can at least call me horse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many ADHD kids does it take to change a lightbulb? It takes twenty se- hey, this is in the wrong category!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day little Susie, who is a blond(since this is in the ''blond'' category), was at her grandma''s house. She had been there for about two days and today grandma isn''t feeling very well. The grandma is in bed, coughing and it isn''t getting any better. The Grandma tells little Susie to go to the pharmacist and get some syrup for her cough. So little Susie goes to the local pharmacy and she buys the syrup. The clerk tells her to remember to ''SHAKE WELL BEFORE USE''. Susie goes back to the house and moments later, the ambulance has arrived and the doctors are trying their best to save poor granny. When they questioned Susie about what happened, she says "Well, the clerk at the pharmacy and the instructions on the bottle said ''SHAKE WELL BEFORE USE''". One doctor said "So?". "Well I shook granny very well and gave her the medicine. Do you think this happened cause I didn''t shake her well?" replies Susie who is now in tears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, that she made a crack on the sidewalk and tried to smoke it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a fly can fly, can an elephant elephant?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw yo momma walkin'' down the street the other day, with a fat pig under her arm. So, I went up to her and asked, ''''Hey, where did you get that?'''' and the PIG says ''''I won her in a contest!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? 1:Let''s go ride our bikes! 2:Hey look! A squirrel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock? Who''s there? Little Boy Blue! Little Boy Blue Who? Michael Jackson! If you don''t get it, read the title. If you still don''t get it, pm me. If you STILL DON''T GET IT, you''re an asshole', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, I was bored and I felt like going for a ride on my bicycle. I hadn''t been used for a while, since I use my car. So, I dusted it off and went off for a 1 hour ride. I was going down the street and I''m known for my absent mindedness. I didn''t notice this guy was crossing the street and I went and bumped into him. Now, this man was mad cause he was wearing his new white pants and my tire got it all dirty. I got off my bike and he gave me a scolding for 2 minutes until some passersby came to my rescue and calmed him down. One of ''em said "Hey, calm down buddy. He''s just a kid"(I am 17). And the man says "A kid?! Look at him! He looks like he can MAKE kids now!". I was like "Wha...? Hey, you''re lucky I wasn''t drivin'' my car!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jimmy To Billy : You ain''t half the man yo momma was. But hey, you ARE half the girl yo papa was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jimmy: Hey, you momma is so fat, that she fills up Myspace Billy: Hey, yo momma IS my space, your space and everybody''s space!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These danish chicks flash their hairy armpits, while they catch guys'' reaction on candid camera. Scroll in a few minutes - it is hilarious http://www.dr.dk/pirattv/programmer/soestrene-bidsk/soestrene-bidsk-tester-angst-for-haar/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what? Everybody is screwed these days. In the office, you''re screwed if you don''t do you''re job well. At home, You''re screwed if you don''t listen to your parents. At school/college, You''re screwed by many- Teachers, bullies, the principal etc... And they say we''re all screwed on December 21st 2012! But, these things don''t bother me. The one thing that makes me mad is when I''m looking for a virgin and they''re ALL screwed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('USA:What''s wrong world? World:(crying and sniffling) My kitty died! USA: That''s unfortunate. Here''s a couple hundred billion dollars my hardworking citizens paid. I was gonna spend it on education and defence and whatnot, but you need it more. World:(takes the money) Cheapass! (spits in USA''s face)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was kneeling by his bed, praying. His wife walks in and asks "Whatcha doin''?" The man - once finishing - says "Praying." "Whatcha prayin for?" says the lady. "Guidance." "Don''t pray for guidance, pray for stiffness and I''ll guide it myself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bulls are in a locker room when one guy notices the other dude has a cork in his ass. He says, "How''d you get a cork in your ass?" The other bull says, "I was walking along the beach and I tripped over a lamp. There was a puff of smoke, and then a red man in a turban came oozing out. He said, ''I am Tonto, the Genie. I can grant you one wish.'' And I said, ''No bullshit!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently, a Polish driver living in southern Ireland by the name of Prawo Jazdy had racked up dozens of speeding tickets and parking fines - but with a different address on each occasion. Eventually, the Garda discovered that Prawo Jazdy is Polish for ''driving licence''. . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You probably know for a fact that Adolf Hitler had only one testicle. And here we say ''''You got to have balls to become a leader''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple was watching the news when the man farts. The man asks "Was that me, or you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy comes home from school and runs to his father. The boy says ''''Dad, a boy in my class calls me a gay'''' . ''''Oh yeah? Well then beat him up!'''' says his dad. The boy replies ''''I can''t dad!''''. ''''Why not son?''''. The boy looking away says ''''Because he''s kinda cute''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No cure here. . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so old that when she farts, dust comes out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she''s NOT on A Diet. . .she''s on two Diets cause one ain''t fittin'' her well!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Moe the midget always gets bullied by Terrance the tall goon. After many months of getting bullied and being made fun of his size, Moe has had it. One day, Moe challenges Terrance saying, "If you can do everything I can, then I will leave town forever and if you can''t, then you will have to leave town and never return." Terrance accepts with confidence. For the first round, Moe does 10 back-flips continuously. A crowd watching the whole thing, claps. Unfortunately, Terrance also does the back-flips and wins the round. For the second round, Moe does a hand stand and walks around for several minutes without losing balance. This round is also won by Terrance. For the final round, Moe ask for Terrance to spread his legs apart while standing. Terrance does so. Moe runs in between Terrance''s legs 5 times and says, "Now YOU do that," and Moe spreads his legs apart . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma has afros on her nipples', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the integral of 1/cabin? A natural log cabin. No, a houseboat you forgot to add the c!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If only DEAD people understand hexadecimal, how many people understand hexadecimal? 57005.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do mathematicians always confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An analyst, a pure mathematician, and a statistician apply for a job. The interviewer asks each of them the question "What is 1/3 multiplied by 3?" The analyst enters it into his calculator and replies that the answer is 0.9999999. The pure mathematician replies that the answer is obviously 1. Then, the statistician asks the interviewer "What do you want it to be?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mathematician and his best friend, an engineer, attend a public lecture on geometry in thirteen-dimensional space. "How did you like it?" the mathematician wants to know after the talk. "My head''s spinning," the engineer confesses. "How can you develop any intuition for thirteen-dimensional space?" "Well, it''s not even difficult. All I do is visualize the situation in n-dimensional space and then set n = 13."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mathematician, an engineer and a chemist are at a conference. They are staying in adjoining rooms. One evening they are downstairs in the bar. The mathematician goes to bed first. The chemist goes next, followed a minute or two later by the engineer. The chemist notices that in the corridor outside their rooms a rubbish bin is ablaze. There is a bucket of water nearby. The chemist starts concocting a means of generating carbon dioxide in order to create a makeshift extinguisher but before he can do so the engineer arrives, dumps the water on the fire and puts it out. The next morning the chemist and engineer tell the mathematician about the fire. She admits she saw it. They ask her why she didn''t put it out. She replies contemptuously "there was a fire and a bucket of water: a solution obviously existed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first goes up to the bartender and says, "I''ll have a pint of lager, please." The next one says, "and I''ll have half of what he''s having." The bartender says, "You''re all idiots," and pulls two pints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are on a train in Scotland. The astronomer looks out of the window, sees a black sheep standing in a field, and remarks, "How odd. Scottish sheep are black." "No, no, no!" says the physicist. "Only some Scottish sheep are black." The mathematician rolls his eyes at his companions'' muddled thinking and says, "In Scotland, there is at least one sheep, at least one side of which looks black."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Premise I: Knowledge is power. Premise II: Power corrupts. Conclusion: Therefore, knowledge corrupts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is sin x divided by n? Canceling the "n" yields six.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dozen, a gross, and a score Plus three times the square root of four Divided by seven Plus five times eleven Is nine squared and not a bit more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If 1/(x-8) approaches as x approaches 8 from above, then will 1/(x-3) approach as x approaches 3 from above?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Super Agility: "Oh look, a bullet. Better dodge that!" *mega-jump!* Bulletproof: "Oh look, a bullet. Meh, who cares?" Super Smart: "Eureka! A Bullet! It going 60 MPH will hit me in 5 seconds if it contacts, but there is only a 1 in 7 chance it will hit me, the decimal being 0.1428571429 to the tenth pl-OOOFF!" Which do YOU want? Me: Super Agility. Comment for your choice, but it doesn''t have to be one of these.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Army brat was boasting about his father to a Navy brat. "My dad is an engineer. He can do everything. Do you know the Alps?" "Yes," said the Navy brat. "My dad has built them." Then the navy kid spoke: "And do you know the Dead Sea?" "Yes." "It''s my dad who''s killed it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Englishman and the Scotsman both walk into a bar. The Irishman ducks under it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, a Scotsman and a rabbi walk into a bar. The rabbi stops and says "I think I''m in the wrong joke."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Dane, a Norwegian and Snakeyboy made a wager on who could remain inside a goat pen the longest. First out was the Dane, who came out after just 10 minutes yelling "Damn! The goat stinks!" After him the Norwegian went in, and after half an hour he came out yelling, "Damn! The goat stinks!" Finally Snakeyboy went in. After 2 hours the goat came rushing out yelling "Damn! Snakeyboy stinks!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re addicted to wocka when your friends say something funny, and you cry out ''''LOL, LOL'''' instead of actually laughing out loud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('U.S. President Calvin Coolidge and his wife allegedly visited a poultry farm. During the tour, Mrs. Coolidge inquired of the farmer how his farm managed to produce so many fertile eggs with such a small number of roosters. The farmer proudly explained that his roosters performed their duty dozens of times each day. "Perhaps you could point that out to Mr. Coolidge," pointedly replied the First Lady. The President, overhearing the remark, asked the farmer, "Does each rooster service the same hen each time?" "No," replied the farmer, "there are many hens for each rooster." "Perhaps you could point that out to Mrs. Coolidge," replied the President.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a bullfighter tries to do. (avoid-a-bull)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('too much to pay for corn ([a] buck an ear)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fashionably dressed big cat (dandy lion)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Possessing only ten teeth. (deca-dent)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where people wait for buses. (the-bus-station)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('live long (die late)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Consumption of an expensive meal. (fortune-ate)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A flaming elf. (imp-alight)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('where one places dirty dishes (in the sink)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred got home from his Sunday round of golf later than normal and very tired. "Bad day at the course?" his wife asked. "Everything was going fine," he said. "Then Harry had a heart attack and died on the 10th tee." "Oh, that''s awful!" "You''re not kidding. For the whole back nine it was hit the ball, drag Harry, hit the ball, drag Harry..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golfer, playing a round by himself, is about to tee off, and a greasy little salesman runs up to him, and yells, "Wait! Before you tee off, I have something really amazing to show you!" The golfer, annoyed, says, "What is it?" "It''s a special golf ball," says the salesman. "You can never lose it!" "Whattaya mean," scoffs the golfer, "you can never lose it? What if you hit it into the water?" "No problem," says the salesman. "It floats, and it detects where the shore is, and spins towards it." "Well, what if you hit it into the woods?" "Easy," says the salesman. "It emits a beeping sound, and you can find it with your eyes closed." "Okay," says the golfer, impressed. "But what if your round goes late and it gets dark?" "No problem, sir, this golf ball glows in the dark! I''m telling you, you can never lose this golf ball!" The golfer buys it at once. "Just one question," he says to the salesman. "Where did you get it?" "I found it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The train was about to pull out of the station. A young man ran towards it and managed to throw his bag in and climb aboard just in time. A fellow passenger looked at him and said, "Young man, you should be in better shape! At your age, I could catch the train by a gnat''s whisker and still be fresh. Look at you, panting away." The young man took a deep breath and said, "I missed this train at the last station."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Wocka users does it take to change a lightbulb? A: All of ''em. One to hold the lightbulb and the rest to argue if this is funny or not.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Italian suppositories. (in-you-end-os)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me not on time. (I-(am)-so-late)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A foot. (leg-end)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English tramp. (hobo)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In favour of youth. (pro-teen)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What trees do in Spring. (re-leaf)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('how geese fly (in formation)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you use a banana as a compass? Place a banana on the Berlin Wall. East is where a bite has been taken out of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Berlin children spoke to each other over the wall. The little girl in the West says, while eating a banana, "Look - I have a banana." The boy in the East doesn''t want to be inferior to her in anything and says, full of pride: "We have socialism." The girl counters: "So, we''ll have socialism soon too." The boy, triumphant: "See, then you won''t have any bananas any more either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the GDR, at traffic hubs and in front of supermarkets there are "banana machines". You stick a banana in and five Ostmarks come out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A west-german boy to a ddr-boy: Why is the banana curved? The ossie replies: Why, is this curved? (old Hungarian joke)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which three great nations in the world begin with "U"? - USA, USSR, and our (German:unsere) GDR (USA, UdSSR, Unsere DDR). (A play on the way official discourse often used the phrase "our GDR", and also often exaggerated the GDR''s world status.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks in school: "What is the most important thing in socialism?" The students consider and little Fritz (Fritzchen) answers: "The most important thing in socialism is the human!" The teacher: "That is a good answer, Fritzchen. I will give you a B-grade." Fritzchen is dissatisfied and responds emphatically: "Would you maybe give me an A if I told you what the human''s name was?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks: "Fritzchen, why are you always speaking of our Soviet brothers? It''s ''Soviet friends''." Fritz responds: "Well, you can pick your friends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honecker meets Mao and asks him: "How many political opponents do you have in China?" Mao: "I estimate about 17 million." Honecker: "Oh, that''s pretty much the same here." (The GDR had 17 million inhabitants)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks: "Fritzchen, what is the difference between capitalism and socialism?" Fritz replies: "Capitalism is the exploitation of man by man. Under socialism, it is the other way around."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The fact that the GDR considers itself as one of the 5 technologically most advanced power of the nations may be be given to the fact that there are only 5 fingers on a hand. University lecture in Hungary in the 70s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Early in the morning, Honecker arrives at his office and opens his window. He sees the sun and says: "Good morning, dear Sun!" The sun replies: "Good morning, dear Erich!" Honecker works, and then at noon he heads to the window and says: "Good day, dear Sun!" The sun replies: "Good day, dear Erich!" In the evening, Erich calls it a day, and heads once more to the window, and says: "Good evening, dear Sun!" The sun is silent. Honecker says again: "Good evening, dear Sun! What''s the matter?" The sun replies: "Kiss my ass. I''m in the West now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Honecker and a telephone? None! Hang up and try again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honecker and Mielke are discussing their hobbies. Honecker: "I collect all the jokes about me that are in circulation." Mielke: "Then we have almost the same hobby. I collect those who bring the jokes into circulation."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell that the Stasi has bugged your apartment? There''s a new cabinet in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Stasi agents are on a surveillance mission and quite bored. First agent: "Hey, what are you thinking about?" Second agent: "Oh, nothing special. The same as you..." First agent: "In that case, you''re under arrest!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guest: "A cup of coffee, please!" Waiter: "Turkish or filtered?" Guest: "Why, filtered, of course." Waiter: "Then you''ll have to bring your own filter paper for now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an HO-sausage and Sputnik? They''ve officially confirmed that Sputnik 2 had a dog in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the most-frequently used word at the German-German border? "Goose meat". (Gnsefleisch, sounds like the first three words in Genn'' se vleisch mal ''n Gofferraum offmachn? in the Saxon accent, Knnen Sie vielleicht mal den Kofferraum aufmachen? in standard German, which means Could you please open the trunk? )', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doorbell rings. The woman goes to the door and shortly comes back startled and turns to her husband, seeking help: "Dieter! There''s a man standing outside who only asks ''Tat tata''" (Tat tata is onomatopoeia for the sound a police car siren makes). Dieter goes to the door and comes back laughing. "It''s my coworker from Saxony, asking "is do Dieta da?" (Ist der Dieter da?, "Is Dieter there?")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was fishing. After a while another angler came to join him. "Have you had any bites?" asked the second man. "Yes, lots," replied the first one, "but they were all mosquitoes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you double the value of a Trabant? Fill up the tank!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('VEB Sachsenring brought out a new Eco-Trabi: Immediately available for delivery, extremely cheap, extremely quiet, extremely environmentally friendly - with electric power train. Small problem: The extension cord is only 20 meters long and not in stock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know they have Knight Rider in the GDR? It''s a Trabant with a pocket calculator!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a visit to the Leipzig Trade Fair, a filthy rich oil sheik heard that there is a car with a delivery time of over ten years. Since Rolls Royce usually delivers more quickly than that, it must be quite an exceptional car, which he would certainly have to have in his collection. Sight unseen, he made a request to order this Trabant. In Zwickau, they''re aware of this great honor, so they immediately change the running Five-Year Plan and bring forward a specimen. In the container, the car reaches the emirate in a handful of weeks. The happy oil sheik immediately called his friends together, opened the container, and exclaimed in surprise: "Gosh, they have incredibly long delivery times, but at least they send you a cardboard model in advance and the best, you can even drive it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A West German businessman is driving a Mercedes through East Germany on a rainy night when his windshield wipers stop working. He takes it to an East German mechanic, who tells him there are no Mercedes windshield wiper motors in the GDR, but he will do his best to fix it. When the businessman returns the next day, to his surprise the windshield wipers are working perfectly. "How did you find a Mercedes windshield wiper motor in the East?" he asks the mechanic. "We didn''t," replies the mechanic, "We used the engine motor of a Trabant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there so many bananas in the West? Because the Westerners are descended from apes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Western necktie and a cow''s tail? The cow''s tail covers the whole asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the peak of the wave of East Germans fleeing through Hungary and Czechoslovakia in 1989, the persons still staying in East Germany (DDR) were called the "Der Dumme Rest" (the dumb remains).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an Ossi with a Wessi? An arrogant unemployed person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you tell that an elephant is in the bathtub with you? A: By the smell of peanuts on its breath.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do elephants paint their toes yellow? A: So they can hide upside down in the custard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the Dallas chief of police say when the elephant walked into the police station? A: Nothing! He didn''t notice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do elephants have big ears? A: Because Noddy would not pay the ransom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant? A: With a blue elephant gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant? A: Have you ever seen a yellow elephant?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you shoot a red elephant? A: Hold his trunk shut until he turns blue, and then shoot him with the blue elephant gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you shoot a purple elephant? A: Paint him red, hold his trunk shut until he turns blue, and then shoot him with the blue elephant gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many elephants will fit into a Mini? A: Four: Two in the front, two in the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many giraffes will fit into a Mini? A: None. It''s full of elephants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you get two whales in a Mini? A: Along the M4 and across the Severn Bridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you know there are two elephants in your refrigerator? A: You can hear giggling when the light goes out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you know there are three elephants in your refrigerator? A: You can''t close the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you know there are four elephants in your refrigerator? A: There''s an empty Mini parked outside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do elephants have that nothing else has? Baby elephants!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is brown, has four legs, and a trunk? A: A mouse coming back from vacation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What has eight legs, two trunks, four eyes, and two tails? A: Two elephants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why is an elephant big, grey and wrinkly? A: Because if it was small, white and hard it would be an aspirin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are golf balls small and white? Because if they were big and grey they would be elephants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between an elephant and a plum? A: Their color.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had only one day left to live, I would live it in my Social Studies class; it would seem so much longer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did Tarzan say to Jane when he saw the elephants coming? A: Here come the elephants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did Jane say to Tarzan when she saw the elephants coming? A: Here come the plums; she was color blind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is big and grey and comes in quarts? A: An elephant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heaven is where the police are British, the cooks French, the mechanics German, the lovers Italian, and it is all organized by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are British, the mechanics French, the lovers Swiss, the police German, and it is all organized by the Italians.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Would you hit a woman with a baby? No, I''d hit her with a brick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has four legs and ticks? A walking clock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you keep an idiot busy? A: Have him read this.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''d like to know how to keep an idiot busy for hours, go to this page: http://www.wocka.com/joke.php?id=17559', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scottish Presbyterian is rescued after many years on a desert island. As he stands on the deck of the rescuing vessel, the captain says to him, "I thought you were stranded alone. How come I can see three huts on the beach?" - "Well," replies the castaway, "that one there is my house and that one there is where I go to church." - "And the third one?" asks the skipper. - "Oh, that''s my old church."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Rabbis argued late into the night about the existence of God, and, using strong arguments from the scriptures, ended up indisputably disproving His existence. The next day, one Rabbi was surprised to see the other walking into the Shul for morning services. "I thought we had agreed there was no God", he said. "Yes, what does that have to do with it?" replied the other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The devil is the father of lies, but he neglected to patent the idea, and the business now suffers from competition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Rabbis were discussing their problems with squirrels in their synagogue attic. One Rabbi said they simply called an exterminator and they never saw the squirrels again. The other Rabbi said, "We just gave them all a bar mitzvah, and never saw the squirrels again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Is one permitted to ride in an airplane on the Sabbath? A: Yes, as long as your seat belt remains fastened. In this case, it is considered that you are not riding, you are wearing the plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three hasidim are bragging about their Rebbes: "My rebbe is very powerful. He was walking once, and there was a big lake in his path. He waved his handkerchief, and there was lake on the right, lake on the left, but no lake in the middle." To which the second retorted, "That''s nothing. My rebbe is even more powerful. He was walking once, and there was a huge mountain in his path. He waved his handkerchief, and there was mountain on the right, mountain on the left, but no mountain in the middle!" Said the third, "Ha! That is still nothing! My rebbe is the most powerful. He was walking once on Shabbos (Saturday, the holy day in Judaism, on which it is forbidden to handle money), and there was a wallet crammed full of cash in his path. He waved his handkerchief, and it was Shabbos on the right, Shabbos on the left, but not Shabbos in the middle!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Chelm, the shammes used to go around waking everyone up for minyan (communal prayer) in the morning. Every time it snowed, the people would complain that, although the snow was beautiful, they could not see it in its pristine state because by the time they got up in the morning, the shammes had already trekked through the snow. The townspeople decided that they had to find a way to be woken up for minyan without having the shammes making tracks in the snow. The people of Chelm hit on a solution: they got four volunteers to carry the shammes around on a table when there was fresh snow in the morning. That way, the shammes could make his wake up calls, but he would not leave tracks in the snow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The town of Chelm decided to build a new synagogue. So, some strong, able-bodied men were sent to a mountaintop to gather heavy stones for the foundation. The men put the stones on their shoulders and trudged down the mountain to the town below. When they arrived, the town constable yelled, "Foolish men! You should have rolled the stones down the mountain!" The men agreed this was an excellent idea. So they turned around, and with the stones still on their shoulders, trudged back up the mountain, and rolled the stones back down again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sexton of the synagogue decided to install a poor box so that the fortunate might share their wealth with the needy. On shabbes eve, he announced to the congregation that a new opportunity for mitzvoh was available. "But," one member complained, "it will be so easy for the goneffs (thieves) to steal from the box." The sexton thought long and hard that night, and announced the next day that he had found a solution. Pointing upward, he showed, the poor box was now suspended from a chain at the ceiling, high, high, high overhead. "But now how do we put money in the box?" The next week, the congregation saw the wonderful solution. A lovely circular stairway now ascended to the poor box making it easy to contribute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the assassination of Tsar Alexander II of Russia, a government official in Ukraine menacingly addressed the local rabbi, "I suppose you know in full detail who was behind it." "Ach," the rabbi replied, "I have no idea, but the government''s conclusion will be the same as always: they will blame the Jews and the bicyclists." "Why the bicyclists?" asked the befuddled official. "Why the Jews?" responded the rabbi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the days of oppression and poverty of the Russian shtetls, one village had a rumour going around: a Christian girl was found murdered near their village. Fearing a pogrom, they gathered at the synagogue. Suddenly, the rabbi came running up, and cried, "Wonderful news! The murdered girl was Jewish!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During World War II, a sergeant gets a telephone call from a woman. "We would love it," she said, "if you could bring five of your soldiers over to our house for Thanksgiving dinner." "Certainly, ma''am," replied the sergeant. "Oh... just make sure they aren''t Jews, of course," said the woman. "Will do," replied the sergeant. So that Thanksgiving while the woman is baking, the doorbell rings. She opens her door and, to her horror, five black soldiers are standing in front of her. "Oh, my!" she exclaimed. "I''m afraid there''s been a terrible mistake!" "No ma''am," said one of the soldiers. "Sergeant Rosenbloom never makes mistakes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Post-Soviet Russia. Rabinovich calls the Pamyat headquarters: "Is it true that we Jews sold out Mother Russia?" In return he hears an affirmation accompanied by antisemitic slurs. "Oh good. So where can I get my share?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Reform Rabbi was so compulsive a golfer that once, on Yom Kippur, he left the house early and went out for a quick nine holes by himself. An angel who happened to be looking on immediately notified his superiors that a grievous sin was being committed. On the sixth hole, God caused a mighty wind to take the ball directly from the tee to the cup a miraculous shot. The angel was horrified. "A hole in one!" he exclaimed, "You call this a punishment, Lord?!" Answered God with a sly smile, "So who can he tell?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Orthodox, a Conservative, and a Reform rabbi are each asked whether one is supposed to say a brokhe (blessing) over a lobster (non-kosher food, normally not eaten by religious Jews). The Orthodox rabbi doesn''t know what a "lobster" is. The Conservative rabbi doesn''t know what to say. The Reform rabbi says, "What''s a brokhe?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We were married by a Reform rabbi in Long Island. A very Reform rabbi. A Nazi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At an Orthodox wedding, the bride''s mother is pregnant. At a Conservative wedding, the bride is pregnant. At a Reform wedding, the rabbi is pregnant. At a Reconstructionist wedding, the rabbi and her wife are both pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rabbi Zwi Chaim Yisroel, an Orthodox scholar of the Torah and a man who developed whining to an art unheard of in the West, was unanimously hailed as the wisest man of the Renaissance by his fellow Hebrews, who totaled a sixteenth of one per cent of the population. Once, while he was on his way to synagogue to celebrate the sacred Jewish holiday commemorating God''s reneging on every promise, a woman stopped him and asked the following question: ''Rabbi, why are we not allowed to eat pork?'' ''We''re not?'' the Rev said incredulously. ''Uh-oh.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One early winter morning, Rabbi Bloom was walking beside the canal when he saw a dog in the water, trying hard to stay afloat. It looked so sad and exhausted that Rabbi Bloom jumped in, and after a struggle, managed to bring it out alive. A passer-by who saw this remarked, "That was very brave of you! You must love animals; are you a vet?" Rabbi Bloom replied, "And vhat did you expect? Of course I''m avet! I''m afreezing cold as vell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Jewish beggar was out on the street in New York City with his tin cup. "Please, sir," he pleaded to a passerby, "could you spare seventy-three cents for a cup of coffee and some pie?" The man asked, "Where do you get coffee and pie for seventy-three cents in New York? It costs at least a dollar!" The beggar replied, "So who buys retail?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire. I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows. And a foundation leaks and a ball game gets rained out and a car rusts and... If you don''t like my driving, don''t call anyone. Just take another road. That''s why the highway department made so many of them. Remember: you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar... Of course, how you spend your leisure time is your business. A man''s best friend is his dog. That''s assuming you want a friend who messes on your carpet and drools on your newspaper. If I won the lottery, I wouldn''t be one of those people who immediately quit their jobs. I''d make my boss''s life a living hell for a week or two first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions. Weird: STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS. No one ever says "It''s only a game," when THEIR team is winning. Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers? If it''s true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s a dog eat dog world out there. And they''re short on napkins. Married people don''t live longer than single people. It just seems longer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After performing a marriage the rabbi gave some advice to the newlyweds: "The first ten years are always the hardest," said the rabbi. "How many years have you been married?" they asked. "Ten years," the rabbi replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is one Nobel Prize so much to ask from a child after all I''ve done?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sarah, how''s that boy of yours? "David? Ach, don''t ask - he''s living in Miami with a man named Miguel" "That''s terrible!" "I know - why couldn''t he find a nice Jewish boy?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Frenchman, a German and a Jew walk into a bar. "I''m tired and thirsty," says the Frenchman. "I must have wine." "I''m tired and thirsty," says the German. "I must have beer." "I''m tired and thirsty," says the Jew. "I must have diabetes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish man in a hospital tells the doctor he wants to be transferred to a different hospital. The doctor says "What''s wrong? Is it the food?" "No, the food is fine. I can''t kvetch." "Is it the room?" "No, the room is fine. I can''t kvetch." "Is it the staff?" "No, everyone on the staff is fine. I can''t kvetch." "Then why do you want to be transferred?" "I can''t kvetch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Jewish man riding on a train begins to moan: "Oy, am I thirsty; oy, am I thirsty", to the annoyance of the other passengers. Finally, another passenger gets a cup of water from the drinking fountain and gives it to the old man, who thanks him profusely and gulps it down. Feeling satisfied, the other passenger sits down again, only to hear "Oy, was I thirsty; oy, was I thirsty".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi and a Catholic priest are having lunch in a restaurant. The priest''s food arrives, a scrumptious-looking ham entre. The priest attacks his lunch, savouring every bite of the ham. Noticing the rabbi eyeing him, he asks, "So tell me, Rabbi Goldblum, have you ever had any pork before?" The rabbi hesitates. "Well, it''s not for me to say..." The priest pushes on. "Oh, c''mon, Rabbi. We''re both men of God here. We can tell each other our sins. Nothing to it." "Umm... well, yes, as a matter of fact, I did have pork once." Smugly the priest teases him, "And a fine meat it was, wasn''t it? Heheh." "Yeah, I''ll say." A few moments pass. The rabbi asks the priest: "Tell me Father, have you ever had sex with a woman before?" "Why of course... well, before I took holy orders, that is." The rabbi smirks, "Sure beat the taste of pork, didn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi once asked his old friend, a priest, "Could you ever be promoted within your Church?" The priest says, thoughtfully, "Well, I could become a bishop." The rabbi persists, "And after that?" With a pause for consideration, the priest replies, "Maybe I could be a cardinal, even." "And then?" After thinking for some time, the priest responds, "Someday I may even rise to be the Pope." But the rabbi is still not satisfied. "And then?" With an air of incredulity, the priest cries, "What more could I become? God Himself?" The rabbi says quietly, "One of our boys made it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi is on his deathbed, and a friend asks him if he has any last requests. The Rabbi asks his friend to find him a Catholic priest, so that he might convert. Confused, his friend asks, "Rabbi, why? You have been a great teacher and leader of your followers, and you have led a good and honorable Jewish life. Why would you want to become a Catholic now, before you die?" He says, "Eh, better one of them than one of us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister told his friend Rabbi Goldman, "Last night, I dreamed of the Jewish Heaven. It was a slum, and it was overflowing with people running, playing, talking, sitting doing all sorts of things. But the dream, and the noise, was so terrific that I woke up." The rabbi said, "Really? Last night, I dreamed of the Protestant Heaven. It was a nice, proper suburb, with neatly trimmed lawns, and houses all neatly lined up." "And how did the people behave?" asked the minister. "What people?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Rabinovich, what is a fortune? A: A fortune is to live in our Socialist motherland. Q: And what''s a misfortune? A: A misfortune is to have such a fortune.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Armenian is on his deathbed: "My children, remember to defend the Jews." "Why Jews?" "Because if they are gone, we will be next."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Jewish man is picked up by the Stalinist police and brought in for questioning: Where were you born?! St. Petersburg. Where do you live?! Leningrad. (menacingly) Where would you like to die?! St. Petersburg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Comrade Lev, why now, just when things are getting better for your people, are you applying for an exit visa to make aliyah to Israel? A: Well, comrade, there are two reasons. One is that my next-door neighbor is Pamyat and he tells me that after they get rid of you communists, they are coming next after the Jews. Q: But they will never get rid of us communists! A: I know, I know, of course you are right! And that''s the other reason.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly man refuses to leave for the air raid shelter until he can find his dentures. His wife yells at him, "What, you think they are dropping sandwiches?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock! Who''s there? Delores. Delores who? Delores my shepherd...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Toc Toc! Qui est l? Sheila. Sheila qui? Sheila lutte finale...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock, knock! Who''s there, i'' th'' name of Beelzebub? Here''s a farmer that hanged himself on the expectation of plenty. Come in time, have napkins enough about you, here you''ll sweat for ''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock! Who''s there, in th'' other devil''s name? Faith, here''s an equivocator that could swear in both the scales against either scale, who committed treason enough for God''s sake, yet could not equivocate to heaven. O, come in, equivocator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The economy is so bad. . . if the bank returns your check marked ''''Insufficient Funds,'''' you call them and ask if they meant you or them. The economy is so bad. . . a truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a girl the other day. I didn''t like her because she was a butter face. You know ''butter face'' - she has a hot body, but her face . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock, knock! Who''s there? Faith, here''s an English tailor come hither for stealing out of a French hose. Come in, tailor. Here you may roast your gooses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock! Who''s there? Sobers. Sobers who? Sau baras se khatkhata rahen hain, Ab to darwazaa kholo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many Iranians does it take to change a light bulb? A. You send us the prize money and we''ll tell you the answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender turns to them, takes one look, and says "What is this - some kind of joke?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A performative poet of Hibernia Rhymed himself into a hernia He became quite adept At this practise, except For the occasional non-sequitur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve often started off with a lawyer joke, a complete caricature of a lawyer who''s been nasty, greedy and unethical. But I''ve stopped that practice. I gradually realised that the lawyers in the audience didn''t think the jokes were funny and the non-lawyers didn''t know they were jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but the thing dies in the process and the innards are discouraging to any but the pure scientific mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three people of different nationalities walk into a bar. Two of them say something smart, and the third one makes a mockery of his fellow countrymen by acting dumb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is by me, the asshole who dupes himeself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many members of a certain demographic group does it take to perform a specified task? A finite number: one to perform the task and the remainder to act in a manner stereotypical of the group in question.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was an X from place B, That satisfied predicate P, He or she did thing A, In an adjective way, Resulting in circumstance C.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole goes out one day to use the outhouse, and he finds Sven there. Sven has his wallet out, and he''s throwing money down into the hole of the outhouse. Ole asks, "Uff da! Sven, watcha doin'' there, fella? You''re throwing the five dollar bill and the ten dollar bill down into the hole of the outhouse! Whatcha doin'' that for?" Sven answers, "Well, when I pulled up my trousers I dropped a nickel down thereand I''m not going down into that mess for just a nickel!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Big foot is blurry... that''s the problem!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It would be funny if, while performing an abortion, someone yelled ''abort! abort!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have nothing to declare except my genius.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Race is just a pigment of the imagination.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If all those sweet young things were laid end to end I wouldn''t be a bit surprised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Take my wife please!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it wasn''t for pickpockets, I''d have no sex life at all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overall, I''d say my career as a photographer has been a bit of a blur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a map of the world... its actual size.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it possible to enjoy life to the fullest in the Soviet Union?" The Armenian Radio answers: "Yes, if you like crowded trains."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it good to have sex with an open window?" The Armenian Radio answers: "Yes, but with a woman it is better."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it true that in Moscow, Mercedes cars are being given to citizens?" The Armenian Radio answers: "Yes, but it is not Moscow but Leningrad, not Mercedes but Ladas, and not given to but stolen from."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it true that comrade cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin''s car was stolen in Moscow during the celebrations?" The Armenian Radio answers: "In principle yes, but it was not in Moscow, rather in Kiev, and it was not his car, but his bike and it was not comrade cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin, but comrade highschool teacher Gagarin and his first name was not Yuri, but Leonid..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some provincial man has come to Rome, and walking on the streets was drawing everyone''s attention, being a real double of the emperor Augustus. The emperor, having brought him to the palace, looks at him and then asks: -Tell me, young man, did your mother come to Rome anytime? The reply was: -She never has. But my father frequently was here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man, standing before a censor, is about to testify, whether he has a wife. The censor asks: -Do you have, in all your honesty, a wife? -I surely do, but not in all my honesty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A runner going to participate in the Olympic games had a dream, that he was driving a quadriga. Early in the morning he goes to a fortune-teller for explanation of the dream. The reply is: -You will win, that meant the speed and the strength of the horses. But, to be sure about this, the runner visits another fortune-teller. This one replies: -You will lose. Don''t you understand, that four ones came before you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Russian company: You have two cows. You drink some vodka and count them again. You have five cows. The Russian Mafia shows up and takes however many cows you have.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into his doctor''s office to learn the results of some tests and immediately the doctor greets him by saying "Well Sam, I have good news and bad news. Which would you like to hear first?" Sam decides on the bad news first and his doctor tells him "Sam, I''m very sorry but you have pancreatic cancer. It''s inoperable and you will die within the next 2 months" "That''s absolutely horrible! What could possibly be the good news?" "Well you see that beautiful receptionist out there?" "Yeah?" "I''m screwing her!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad to his family: The phone bill is exceptionally high. You have to limit its use. I don''t use this telephone. I use the one a the office. Mum: Same here, I hardly use this phone as I use my work telephone. Son: Me too, I never use the home telephone. I always use my company mobile. Maid: So what''s the problem? We all use our work telephones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have a million cows. Most of them are illegals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a chicken cross the street? Because it wants to get on the other side!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should not a chicken cross the road? It would be a fowl proceeding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a duck cross the street? Because it was the chicken''s and turkey''s day off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens weren''t invented yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the duck cross the road? To prove he''s no chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road halfway? To "lay it on the line".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you humans call ''THE APOCALYPSE'', I used to call Sunday Dinner! - Archangel, Gabriel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Music Teacher: Anyone has a suggestion to which song we should play next? Johnny: How ''bout we sing ''The Teacher is A Big Fat Bitch. . .in C-Minor?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your father is a poor man, it''s your fate. But, if your father-in-law is a poor man, it''s your stupidity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hw does Battery reproduce? Bi pluging it into Boodler''s Giant ass!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Because it was stuck to the chicken''s feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the duck cross the road? Because the chicken was on holiday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the chicken cross the road? Because he''s "chicken".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a chicken? Neither can ride a bicycle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had no frontal lobe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If rock is wet, it is raining. If rock is green, it rained a while ago. If rock is white, it is snowing. If rock is shaking, there is an earthquake. If rock is dry, the weather is fair. If rock is swinging, it''s windy. If rock is warm, the sun is out. If rock is not visible, it''s dark outside. If rock is under water, there is a flood. If rock is gone, there is a tornado (Run!!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A heavy-set woman goes into a drug store and asks for talcum powder. The bowlegged clerk says, "Walk this way," and the woman answers, "If I could walk that way I would not need talcum powder!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does boodler reproduce? By Fucking Battery''s fat-Shit-and-cum filled ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Battery Fucked Boodler''s ass hard and soft yesterday! Maybe zat explains z growth in z population recently!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('boodler---> kind of sounds like Boob blur! and zats why battery fucks boobler 69 times a day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pass me the shellfish, said Tom crabbily. "That''s the last time I''ll stick my arm in a lion''s mouth," the lion-tamer said off-handedly. "Can I go looking for the Grail again?" Tom requested. "I unclogged the drain with a vacuum cleaner," Tom said succinctly. "I might as well be dead," Tom croaked. "We just struck oil!" Tom gushed. "They had to amputate them both at the ankles," Tom said defeatedly. "Who discovered radium?" asked Marie curiously. "Hurry up and get to the back of the ship," Tom said sternly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scottish highlander is asked what his three wishes would be. He first wishes for a lake full of whisky. His second wish is for a similar quantity of good food. When asked for his third wish, after a moment of indecision, he asks for a second lake full of whisky.[2]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The confused protagonist suddenly finding himself in the presence of the genie, who informs him that he has one wish left; he has just used the second wish to completely undo the effect of the first, including his own memory of making it. Undaunted, the protagonist makes his third wish, only to have the genie comment wryly (just before disappearing) that he wished for the same thing the first time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Milk production at a dairy farm was low so the farmer wrote to the local university, asking help from academia. A multidisciplinary team of professors was assembled, headed by a theoretical physicist, and two weeks of intensive on-site investigation took place. The scholars then returned to the university, notebooks crammed with data, where the task of writing the report was left to the team leader. Shortly thereafter the farmer received the write-up, and opened it to read on the first line: "Consider a spherical cow in vacuum. . . ."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I saw that item, I said to my wife, "I don''t think spaghetti grows on trees", so we''d looked it up in Encyclopdia Britannica. Do you know, Miall, Encyclopdia Britannica doesn''t even mention spaghetti.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In America, you can always find a party. In Russia, the Party finds you. In America, you listen to man on radio. In Soviet Russia, man on radio listen to you. In America, you watch television. In Soviet Russia, television watches you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was reported to have said: "Nikolay is a moron!" and was arrested by the policeman. "No, sir, I meant not our respected Emperor, but another Nikolay!" - "Don''t try to trick me: if you say "moron", you obviously refer to our tsar".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American, a Russian, and an African were all up in a hot-air balloon together. After a few minutes, the Russian man put his hand down through the clouds. He said, "We''re right over my homeland." "How can you tell?" asked the American. "I can feel the cold air," he replied. A few hours later the African man put his hand through the clouds. "We''re right over my homeland," he said. "How do you know that?" asked the Russian. "I can feel the heat of the desert." Several more hours later the American put his hand through the clouds. "Aah! We''re right over New York." The Russian and the African were amazed. "How do you know that?" they exclaimed. The American pulled his hand up. "My watch is missing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve probably heard: If at first you don''t succeed, lower your standards. New Version: If at first you get hit below the belt, lower your belt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A respected merchant Sevenassov wants to change his surname and asks the Tsar for permission. The Emperor writes his resolution: "Allowed to deduct two asses down".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge walks out of his chambers laughing his head off. A colleague approaches him and asks why he is laughing. "I just heard the funniest joke in the world!" "Well, go ahead, tell me!" says the other judge. "I can''t - I just gave a guy ten years for it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Midnight Petrograd... A night watch spots a shadow trying to sneak by. "Stop! Who goes there? Documents!" The frightened person chaotically shuffles through his pockets and drops a paper. A soldier picks it up and reads slowly, with difficulty: "U.ri.ne A.na.ly.sis"... "Hmm... a foreigner, sounds like..." "A spy, looks like.... Let''s shoot him on the spot!" Then reads further: "''Proteins: none, Sugars: none, Fats: none...'' You are free to go, proletarian comrade! Long live the World revolution!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The principle of socialist economy of the period of transition to communism: the authorities pretend they are paying wages, workers pretend they are working. Alternately, "So long as the bosses pretend to pay us, we will pretend to work." This joke persisted essentially unchanged through the 1980s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lenin died, but his cause lives on!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rabinovich notes: "I would prefer it the other way round."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a coincidence: "Brezhnev died, but his body lives on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lenin coined a slogan on how to achieve the state of communism through rule by the Communist Party and modernization of the Russian industry and agriculture: "Communism is Soviet power plus electrification of the whole country!" The slogan was subject to popular mathematical scrutiny: "Consequently, Soviet power is communism minus electrification, and electrification is communism minus Soviet power."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The winter''s passed, The summer''s here. For this we thank Our party dear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One old bolshevik says to another: "No my friend, we will not live long enough to see communism, but our children... poor children."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Will there be KGB in communism? As you know, in communism, the state will be abolished, together with its means of suppression. People will know how to arrest themselves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-How do you deal with mice in the Kremlin? -Put up a sign saying "collective farm". Then half the mice will starve and the others will run away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abramovich was sentenced to 5 years, served 10, then fortunately was paroled before he served the rest of his sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men sit in a jail in (KGB headquarters) Dzerzhinsky Square. The first asks the second why he has been imprisoned, and he says, "Because I criticized Karl Radek." The first man responds, "But I am here because I spoke out in favor of Radek!" They turn to the third man who has been sitting quietly in the back, and ask him why he is in jail too. He responds, "I''m Karl Radek."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it true that conditions in our labor camps are excellent?" Armenian Radio answers: "It is true. Five years ago a listener of ours raised the same question and was sent to one, reportedly to investigate the issue. He hasn''t returned yet; we are told he liked it there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Comrade Brezhnev, is it true that you collect political jokes? "Yes" "And how many have you collected so far?" "Three and a half labor camps."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is it true that there is freedom of speech in the Soviet Union the same as there is in the USA? In principle, yes. In the USA, you can stand in front of the White House in Washington, DC, and yell, "Down with Reagan!" and you will not be punished. Just the same, you can stand in the Red Square in Moscow and yell, "Down with Reagan!" and you will not be punished.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is it true that the Soviet Union is the most progressive country in the world? Of course! The life was already better yesterday than it''s going to be tomorrow!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lenin, Stalin, Khrushchev and Brezhnev are all travelling together in a railway carriage. Unexpectedly, the train stops. Lenin suggests: "Perhaps we should call a subbotnik, so that workers and peasants fix the problem." Stalin puts his head out of the window and shouts, "If the train does not start moving, the driver will be executed!" But the train doesn''t start moving. Khrushchev then shouts, "Let''s take the rails behind the train and use them to construct the tracks in the front." But it still doesn''t move. Brezhnev then says, "Comrades, comrades, let''s draw the curtains, turn on the gramophone and pretend we''re moving!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To sum up the Russians'' experience with political leaders thus far: Lenin showed how a country can be ruled; Stalin showed how a country should be ruled; Khrushchev showed that a moron can rule a country; Brezhnev showed that not just any moron can rule a country.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the famine of the civil war, a delegation of starving peasants comes to the Smolny, wishing to file a petition. "We have even started eating the grass like horses," says one peasant. "Soon we will start neighing like horses!" "Come on! Don''t worry!" says Lenin reassuringly. "We are drinking tea with honey here, and we are not buzzing like bees, are we?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A schoolteacher is leading her students through a park, and they see a baby hare. These are city kids, and have never seen a hare. "Do you know who this is?" asks the teacher. No one knows. "Come on kids", says the teacher trying to lead the children to the answer, "He''s a character in many stories, songs and poems we always read." One student "figures it out," pats the hare and says reverently, "So *that''s* what you''re like, Grandpa Lenin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Comrade Stalin! This man is your exact double! / "Shoot him!" / "Maybe we should shave off his moustache?" / "Good idea! Shave it off and then shoot him!". (In another version, Stalin replies shortly Ili tak [lit. or so], meaning "this way is ok too", which has become somewhat proverbial).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stalin reads his report to the Party Congress. Suddenly someone sneezes. "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) "First row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Applause.) "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) "Second row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Long, loud applause.) "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) ...A dejected voice in the back: "It was me" (Sobs.) Stalin leans forward: "Bless you, comrade!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Khrushchev deseated? Because of the Seven "C"s: Cult of personality, Communism, China, Cuban Crisis, Corn, and Cuzka''s mother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Leonid Ilyich is in surgery. / "Heart again?" / "No, chest expansion surgery: to fit one more Gold Star medal."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the 1980 Olympics, Brezhnev begins his speech. "O!" - applause. "O!" - more applause. "O!" - yet more applause. "O!" - an ovation. "O!!!" - the whole audience stands up and applauds. An aide comes running to the podium and whispers, "Leonid Ilyich, that''s the Olympic rings, you don''t need to read it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Leonid Ilyich!... / "Come on, no formalities among comrades. Just call me ''Ilyich'' ".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The phone rings, Brezhnev picks up the phone: "Hello, this is dear Leonid Ilyich...".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard it? Brezhnev died! / "What happened, heart attack?" / "No, short-circuit of eyebrows."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Comrade Andropov is the most turned on man in Moscow! "Comrade Andropov is sure to light up any discussion!" "Why did Brezhnev go abroad, and Andropov did not? Because Brezhnev ran on batteries, but Andropov needed an outlet." (Reference to Brezhnev''s pacemaker and Andropov''s dialysis machine).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the main difference of succession under tsarist regime and under socialism? "Under tsarist regime the power transferred from father to a son, and under socialism - from one grandfather to another."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today, due to bad health and without regaining consciousness Konstantin Ustinovich Chernenko took up the duties of Secretary General.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a restaurant: Why are the meatballs of cubic shape? Perestroika! (restructuring) Why are they undercooked? Uskoreniye! (acceleration) Why are they bitten? Gospriyomka (state approval) Why are you telling me all this so brazenly? Glasnost! (openness)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A quartet of violinists returns from an international competition. One of them was honored with the possibility to play a Stradivarius violin and cannot stop bragging about this. Another one grunts: "What''s so special about that?". The first one thinks for a minute: "Let me put it in this way for you: just imagine you were given a chance to make a couple of shots from Dzerzhinsky''s mauser..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is more useful newspapers or television? A: Newspapers, of course. You cannot wrap herring in a TV.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five precepts of the Soviet intelligentsia (intellectuals): Do not think. If you think do not speak. If you think and speak do not write. If you think, speak and write do not sign. If you think, speak, write and sign don''t be surprised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife has been going to cooking school for three years. / "She must really cook well by now!" / "No, they''ve only reached the part about the Twentieth CPSU Congress so far."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a shop and says, "I see you don''t have any fish", and the shop assistant replies, "You got it wrong - ours is a butcher: we don''t have any meat. They don''t have any fish in the fish shop that is across the road!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, can I have the car keys? "Ok, but don''t lose them. We will get the car in just seven years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Yeltsin resigned from the Communist Party at the 28th Party Congress, people used to say that "Yeltsin is out of mind,... honour, and conscience of our epoch". (A hint at a widespread propaganda slogan: "Party is Mind, Honour and Conscience of our Epoch")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard, Putin ordered the government to arrest the inflation. Well, not exactly, he ordered to have it arrested...and jailed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stalin''s ghost appears to Putin in a dream, and Putin asks for his help running the country. Stalin says, "Round up and shoot all the democrats, and then paint the inside of the Kremlin blue." "Why blue?" Putin asks. "Ha!" says Stalin. "I knew you wouldn''t ask me about the first part."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attempting to enter a case-sensitive password with caps-lock on. Not checking to ensure that the computer is indeed plugged in. Clicking Yes on message boxes without reading them properly and deleting important files. Forgetting to plug an ethernet cable into their laptop''s network card when in the office. Allowing sessions to timeout when using a web application. Erroneous data entry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the beast shall come forth surrounded by a roiling cloud of vengeance. The house of the unbelievers shall be razed and they shall be scorched to the earth. Their tags shall blink until the end of days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the beast shall be made legion. Its numbers shall be increased a thousand thousand fold. The din of a million keyboards like unto a great storm shall cover the earth, and the followers of Mammon shall tremble.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And so at last the beast fell and the unbelievers rejoiced. But all was not lost, for from the ash rose a great bird. The bird gazed down upon the unbelievers and cast fire and thunder upon them. For the beast had been reborn with its strength renewed, and the followers of Mammon cowered in horror.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irishman, a Scotsman, and an American walk into a bar. The beginning of a cheesy joke? You betcha.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As of 11-23-09, my score was 1337. How the hell that happened beats me. I thought I was a crappy joke writer. This is boring isn''t it? Thought so. At least it''s not a dupe. Or is it... Nope, it''s not. Boring as hell, right? Thought so.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*This is from a comic called Pearls Before Swine, I just wanted to share it with you guys(crowd goes *awwww*)* Dentist(on phone p-D): Hi, this is Dr. Smith''s office calling to remind you about your dental appointment tomorrow. Other Person(P): Can''t make it. D: Why? P: Profanity. It offends me. D: I didn''t use profanity. P: Car won''t start. D: You live a block away. P: 2 broken feet. D: We''ll send a cab. P: No money. D: We''ll pay. P: Mom died. D: You said that last year. P: Dad this time. D: You don''t know which? P: Can''t keep track. D: OF YOUR PARENTS?!?! P: When training for a marathon. D: On 2 broken feet? P: I drive the race. D: Your car won''t start. P: I take a cab. D: You have no money. P: Mom died again. D: Listen here, buddy! Get me a legitimate excuse or get the @!$!@$#% over here! P: Profanity. It offends me. *hangs up* P: Amateurs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How dod the person take over the remote?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the person take over the remote? He asked for remote CONTROLS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had those days when your computer fucking sucks? Now you have a poem to say! I''m gonna get some Coke and a snack, This should be FUCKING WORKING by the time I get back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God said "Let there be light." Chuck Norris said "Say please."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Pokemon Trainer walks into a STD help center. The nurse there says "Sorry, but it looks like you''ve caught ''em all"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a insult I use on my brother''s girlfriend if she starts annoying me too much. She has a very tiny bridge in her nose that is only noticeable if you look close enough. Its fun to mess with her about it cause she is very self conscious about it. That bridge on your nose is so big, it could fit Rosie O''Donald across the Grand Canyon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, Doctor! I have a virus that makes my left hand constantly butter toast. How can I stop it spreading?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was talking to my family and we were doing a family get together session, you know the one teens dread? That one. And my mom asks me, ''if you could ask one person 2 questions, what would ask them?'' So I thought and decided to question" the director of the movie 2012." Me: Sir, your movie is based of the catastrophes that might happen in 2012. Will most people die? Director of 2012: Sure. Me: If you go down, do George Clooney and Brad Pitt go down with you, because that will make me the sexiest man alive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock...Who''s there?....The Gestapo...The Gestapo, who?.....VEE VILL BE ASKING ZE QUESTIONS HERE!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hillbillies just come out of a divorce court. The ex-wife is crying her eyes out. Her ex-husband comes over and says: "There, there Missy, you''re still my sister!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mum''s so fat she fell in love and broke it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mum''s so fat, she jumped for joy and got stuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife : "I dreamt they were auctioning off dicks. The big ones went for ten dollars and the thick ones went for twenty dollars." Husband : "How about the ones like mine?" Wife : "Those they gave away." Husband : "I had a dream too . . . I dreamt they were auctioning off cunts. The pretty ones went for a thousand dollars, and the little tight ones went for two thousand." Wife : "And how much for the ones like mine?" Husband : "That''s where they held the auction."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When was the price of milk the highest? When the cow jumped over the moon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is red, black, has ten eyes, and crawls? I do not know but it is on your head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is SO fat that the amount of food she eats for dinner could feed ALL the Ethiopeans for a year!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so dumb each time she hears Obama''s name on tv she throws her hands in the air + ducks for cover Yelling OH BOMB A WHERE?!?!?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why did hitler kill himself? because he saw his gas bill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('they says theres safety in numbers? tell that to six million jews!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the best way to kill a man? A: Put a pretty blonde and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one. Q: Why do men whistle when they''re sitting on the toilet? A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe. Q: What is the difference between men and women:.... A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need...A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need. Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg ? A. They don''t stop for directions. Q: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving HER money, furs and diamonds. Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Someone Someone who? Someone who cuts of during mid sen . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a mother wants for Mother''s Day 10. To be able to eat a whole candy bar (alone) and drink a soda without any "floaties" (ie, backwash). 9. To have my 14 year-old daughter answer a question without rolling her eyes in that, "Why is this person my mother?" way. 8. Five pounds of chocolate that won''t add twenty. 7. A shower without a child peeking through the curtain with a "Hi Ya Mom!" just as I put a razor to my ankle. 6. A full time cleaning person who looks like Brad Pitt. 5. For my teenager to announce "Hey, Mom! I got a full scholarship and a job all in the same day!" 4. A grocery store that doesn''t have candy/gum/cheap toys displayed at the checkout line. 3. To have a family meal without a discussion about bodily secretions. 2. To be able to step on a plane with my toddlers and NOT have someone moan, "Oh no! Why me . . . !" 1. Four words: Fisher Price Play Prison!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black man and a Jew jump off a building; who wins? Society.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why are black people getting stronger? tv''s are getting bigger', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CONCLUSION: There is a new study about women and how they feel about their asses, the results were pretty interesting: 30% of women think their ass is too fat . . . 10% of women think their ass is too skinny . . . The remaining 60% say they don''t care, they love him, he''s a good man, and they wouldn''t trade him for the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many country singers does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 to screw it in, and 3 to write a song about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the farmer say when his truck disappeared? Where''s my truck?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma'' so fat, she gets winded going up the escalator!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was really hot last summer. In fact, it was so hot I saw a republican with his head out of his ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Part 1 One day, Doraemon was walking down street. He saw Hello Kitty approaching him. Excited by the encounter, he walked towards Hello Kitty and said, "Good morning". Sadly, Hello Kitty did not reply him. Why? Answer: Hello Kitty has no mouth. ------------------------------------ Part 2 Unhappy that she broke Doraemon''s feelings, Hello Kitty decided to bring along a video recorder with the words "Good Morning" recorded by someone else. She saw Doraemon crossing the street, so she approached him and pressed the button: "Good morning". This time, Doraemon did not reply her. Why? Answer: Doraemon has no ears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a series of jokes my friend told me. They were hilarious, and I thought I should share it with everyone. Apologies for any dupes. You: Want to hear a corny joke? Them: Ok You: Where do you plant corns in a farm? Them: Don''t know. Where? You: At the CORNers You: Do you want to hear a cornier joke? Them: Yes You: (pull one lower eyelid) CORNEA! (goofy tone) You: Do you want to hear a long joke or a short joke? Them: Long joke You: Jjjjjoooooookkkkkkkeeeee (drag as long as you can) Them: Short joke You: Jo'' (say it very really fast) Enjoy! :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man- "Jesus Christ! I can''t open this hard drive." Jesus- "Use the torx, Luke."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a black man and a farm tractor? Nothing! The tractor is just an upgrade!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 38 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by. 2. If you''re proud that Alaska makes the national news 96 nights each year because Trapper Creek is the coldest spot in the nation. 3. If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year. 4. If your dad''s suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead. 5. If you may not have actually eaten it, but you have heard of jellied moose nose. 6. If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time. 7. If you have either a pet or child named "Bear".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. If your town has an equal number of bars and churches. 2. If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number. 3. If you know how to say Matanuska, Tokositna, Kichatna, Oshetna, Bodenburg and Muktuk. 4. If you think that ketchup is one of the seven main food groups. 5. If your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a motor home on the highway. 6. If your whole family wears mukluks to church on Sunday. 7. If you see people wearing camouflage at social events - including weddings and funerals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor says I have insomnia, but I''m not going to lose any sleep over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Entitled To One Phone Call Two teenagers were arrested for public lewdness and possession of marijuana when they were found naked, enjoying a joint on the edge of the fountain in the town square. The arresting officer, unable to reach their parents, gave them each one phone call. A half hour later, a man entered the station. The sergeant said, "I suppose you''re the kids'' lawyer?" "Nope," the chap replied. "I''m just delivering their pizza!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Jam and Marmalade? You can''t marmalade your dick up a 2 year olds ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following is based off a true story. In my high school english class our english teacher Ms. Simoff had given us homework to do and if we didn''t do it we wouldn''t be allowed to watch a movie. The next day my friend Jason came in and told the teacher that he did not do his homework. The teacher sent him to another classroom to finish his work. When he asked why he was in trouble Ms. Simoff said, "Because you didn''t do what I asked you to last night." The class proceeded to burst into laughter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich Texan told the president of the University of Texas, "I want to set you up with a billion-dollar endowment fund, with but one condition." "What''s the condition?" asked the U.T president. "I want you to give my horse an honorary degree. She''s served me faithfully for fifteen years and she deserves a B.T. degree, a Bachelor of Transportation." The president said, "I''ve got to consult my trustees. I''ll get back to you." The trustees debated an hour until one senior trustee, who had appeared to be napping during the whole discussion, said softly, "I think we should take his money and give the horse the degree." Another trustee piped up, "But wouldn''t you be embarrassed to give an honorary degree to a horse?" "Nope," said the old man. "In fact, it would be the first time I can remember that we gave an honorary degree to a whole horse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple was sitting on their front porch one day when the husband said: "Whenever I get at mad at you, you never seem to get upset. How do you manage to control your temper?" "I just go and clean the toilet," his wife replied. "How does that help?" asked her husband. "I use your toothbrush."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just in case you are having a rough day, here is a stress management technique recommended in all the latest psychological journals. The funny thing is that it really does work and will make you smile . . . 1. Picture yourself lying on your belly on a warm rock that hangs out over a crystal clear stream. 2. Picture yourself with both your hands dangling in the cool running water. 3. Birds are sweetly singing in the cool mountain air. 4. No one knows your secret place. 5. You are in total seclusion from that hectic place called "the world." 6. The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity. 7. The water is so clear that you can easily make out the face of the person you are holding underwater. There! See? It really does work . . . You''re smiling already.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before he left on a business trip, the father took his young son aside. "Terence, I''m trusting you to take care of the family while I''m gone. You''re going to be the man of the house." Comprehending the gravity of the situation, Terence replied soberly, "In that case, I''m gonna need the remote."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy tells Mick he''s thinking of buying a Labrador dog. "Oh, I wouldn''t if I were you!", says Mick. "Have you seen how many of their owners go blind?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a local college dance in Sweden, an American asked a local girl to dance. While they were dancing, he gave her a little squeeze, and whispered, "In America, we call this a hug." She replied, "Yaah, in Sveden ve call dis a hug, too." A little later, he gave her a peck on the cheek. "In America, we call this a kiss." She replied, "Yaah, in Sveden ve call dis a kiss, too." A few drinks later, they moved out to the campus lawn and had sex. "In America," he told her, "we call this a grass sandwich." She replied, "Yaaah, in Sveden ve call dis a grass sandwich, too, but ve put more meat in it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A twelve-year-old boy received a journal as a birthday gift. He looked at it carefully, but was mystified. "Mom, what''s the deal with this book? All the pages are blank," he asked. "That''s called a journal," she explained. "You write down interesting stuff that happens to you." His face brightened as he caught her drift. "So it''s kinda like a blog, only on paper?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top Ten Signs you''re Not Watching a Real Baseball Team From Late Show with David Letterman; Monday, February 20, 1995 You recognize batter as the kid who sold you a hot dog a couple minutes earlier. Every time a player slides into second, he busts his hip. They keep shouting "Do over!" When umpire yells, "Strike 3!" batter looks at him as if the dude''s speaking French. Try as they might, they just can''t scratch themselves like professionals. First base: Siskel. Second base: Ebert. Game stops when some lady in a house near the stadium shouts "Dinner time!" Players constantly adjusting each other''s cups. You overheard the coach yelling, "Run, Forrest, run!" They play like the Mets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the definition of perfect pitch? When you throw the accordion into the dumpster and it lands on the banjo. What is the definition of a quarter tone? Two oboes playing in unison. What do you call a guitar player who just broke up with his girlfriend?? Homeless. How do you know if the drum stand is level? There is drool coming out of both sides of the drummer''s mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: So class, in the medieval times, the Puritan''s ears were cut off if they didn''t attend Catholic services. Student: I bet they didn''t like the sound of that!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do when you see a Mexican riding a bike? Throw a stone at him, it''s your bike!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do blondes have litlle holes in their faces? From eating with forks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This site is dead. There has been an all-time low in traffic. No one posts anymore. The end of the site is a tragic one, and I will miss the site. Wocka has fallen from its high branch. Submit your hate towards, but you know it''s true.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One fine day.... you''re just walking by.... You look at this bird.... it shits in your eye.... You don''t swear.... you don''t cry.... You just thank God.... that cows don''t fly....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WHERE is my SUNDAY paper? the irate customer calling the newspaper office loudly demanded. "Madam," said the newspaper employee, "today is Saturday. The Sunday paper is not delivered until tomorrow, on SUNDAY." There was quite a long pause on the other end of the phone, followed by a sight of resignation as she was heard to mutter, "Well, fuck . . . I guess that''s why no one was at church today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oedipus was a real motherfucker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken and the road can''t agree on anything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about when the Great Recession began? The President appointed a cat to chair the Federal Reserve. Do you know why? Because when a cat falls, it always lands on its feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her U.S. Government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about. Bambi pondered the question, then finally said, "That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Granny. Granny who? Knock knock. Who''s there? Granny. Granny who? Knock knock. Who''s there? Granny. Granny who? Knock knock. Who''s there? Aunt. Aunt who? Aren''t you glad you got rid of all those grannies?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Japanese steal the Diaoyu Islands? Because they don''t have enough room for their funny farms!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was having a serious surgical operation. When he woke up, he asked his doctor, "Did it go well?" "It went perfectly." "Then why do I have this headache?" "Oh, that. Halfway through the operation, we ran out of anesthetic."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the Swedish word for divorce and swearing? Ikea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Since workaholics are people addicted to work and chocaholics are people addicted to chocolate, are catholics people addicted to cats?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a great memory once, but I don''t know where I left it. You haven''t seen it lying around anywhere have you? No? No what?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As I always say, "REAL men don''t shave below the neck." Well, unless they are a body builder, I guess you have to show it off. Then again, it might be good for a boxer to be more slippery so punches have less "stick" or whatever. Yea, I guess it''s the same with kick boxers. Also, I guess porn stars have their reasons. And male models.... OK, I guess I meant that "REAL men don''t shave below the neck, unless they can beat me up, of course."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you copy from your textbooks, it''s making good use of what you''ve learnt. If you copy from anywhere else, it''s plagiarism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, after what felt like five days of after-school detention, I hailed a taxi - it was almost six, jeez. I opened the door and stepped inside. Making myself comfortable in the back seat, I told him my home address, without caring who the cabbie was. I sank into the seat, with a kind of uneasiness. What would mum do? Ground me for the next ten years? I checked my watch every fifteen seconds, and watched the traffic shooting by. About halfway down the road, the dumb cabbie slowed suddenly. Damn you, I thought. Before I could say anything, the cabbie turned to me. For a moment, I was frozen with fear. The cabbie was not half like anyone I''d seen before. His hair was the colour of fresh blood. His face, on the contrary, was white as a sheet. His cold eyes stared at me as if he was Count Dracula. *** Taking advantage of my momentary paralysis, he spoke. ''My name is Ronald McDonald.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a water bottle and puberty? The water bottle hit Justin Bieber first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('knock knock! whose there? yer mom oh come in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly the bank had to turn its security cameras off when she came in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 year old kid: "Guess what? Daddy got you a pway-station!" 7 year old kid: "Really??!! Where is it?" 3 year old: "It''s in p-one mile!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teenager: Dad, did you hear that Jake broke up with Taylor? Dad: Oh no, another album.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ivan Vakinov Kotcha Vakinov Isenya Vakinov', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our new greengrocery is now starting! We feature lead-free gasoline, phosphorus-free washing powder, fluorine-free refrigerator, ..., and iodine-free salt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s so easy, it makes pie look hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s like Geico: so easy a caveman could do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat that when she rolled offa the bed, she rolled off BOTH sides. Yo momma is so fat that when she jumped for joy, she got stuck. Yo momma''s teeth are so yellow, I can''t believe it''s not butter. Yo momma''s so fat that when she wears a red shirt all the kids go "koolaid! koolaid!" Yo momma''s so fat that when I swerved to miss her, I ran outta gas. Yo momma''s so fat that when I tried to drive around her, I had to stop and ask for directions. Yo momma has so many chins that she keeps a bookmark in her mouth so she can remember where to stuff the food. yo mama is so stupid she sat on the tv and watched the couch xD Yo moma''s like a baby she sucks everything in sight Yo moma''s got more chins than a Chinese phone book...? yo momma so fat even dora couldn''t explore her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick Hurtz (Yeah, we heard ya.) Dick Assman (I wish that last name was superhero name.) Teola doing the Hula to Hawaii (The New Zealand girl who had that name got rid of it in court.) Rusty Kuntz (Ouch.) A. Fucks (Sorry forgot the first name.) (A Brazilian soccer player''s name.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother used to go fishing in the Pacific ocean, but now she goes fission there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma soo fat she sat on a quarter and a booger popped out of George Washington''s nose', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar right at the top of the Grand Canyon. Another patron comes up to him and says "did you know the air currents in the canyon are so strong you can jump off and they pull you right back up?" "What?!" the man said "you must be drunk." "No really, watch this!" and he jumps into the Grand Canyon, and WHOOSH! flies back up. "That was amazing!" the second man said so the first guy does it again. Finally the second guy decides it really does work and goes for it. He jumps off and splatters on the ground. The first guy returns to the bar and the bartender says "Damn, Superman, you sure are a jerk when you''re drunk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superman was bored one day; he goes to see Batman, and he asks, "Do you want to go save the world?" "Sorry" Batman said. "Spring cleaning at the Batcave," so Superman goes to see the Green Lantern. "You wanna save the world?" he asks. "Can''t, ring has been acting up," Lantern said. Then, flying around the city, Superman sees Wonderwoman sitting on top of a building totally naked. Superman thinks to himself, knowing that he could fly down there, do his business and be gone before she realized what happened.(He doesn''t last very long), so he decide to go for it, flies down, has his fun, and is gone. Wonderwoman asks, "What''s wrong, Invisible Man?" "I don''t know but my ass hurts like hell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The farmer had 3 daughters; Flo, Betty, and Sam. Each girl had a date that night, but being the overprotective father that he was he had to meet the guy first. so sitting there in his chair with a shotgun he meets the guys. the first walks up and says "Hi, I''m Joe, I''m here for Flo, we''re going to see the show, is she ready to go?" The farmer allows them to go off, and the next boy comes up. "Hey, my name is Petty, I''m here for Betty, we''re getting spaghetti is she ready?" The Farmer allows them to go. Now the last guy comes up. "Hi, I''m Chuck..." and BAM the farmer shoots him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the joke about the blind gynecologist? She could "read lips."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was in his front yard mowing the grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut & stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps saying, ''YOU''VE GOT MAIL.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were all about to jump off a cliff. As they jumped, they would yell the name of what they wanted to turn into. The redhead went first. She yelled, "Hawk!" and she turned into a hawk and flew away. The brunette went next. She yelled, "Butterfly!" and she turned into a butterfly and flew away. The blonde went last. As she was about to jump, she tripped, and yelled, "Crap!" As she fell, she turned into a piece of poop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is what happen to a boy and his father: Son: dad i want to marry. Father: who do you want to marry? Son: your mother. Father: why do you want to marry my mother? Son: because you also marry my mother. :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lecturing teacher noticed a lack of enthusiasm in her class. Few were paying attention so she decided to make an announcement, "The person to answer this next question gets to go home." The students were all brought to attention and a buzz went over the room. Suddenly, a male student grabbed his bag nd threw it out the window. The entire class went quiet. The teacher said, "Who did that?!" with a sense of anger behind her voice. "Me," the male student replied. "Now I can go home for answering your question." So he walked out of the classroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lady on telephone: "Hello sir, I want to meet & talk to you. You are the father of one of my kids." Guy (stunned!): Are you Sandra? No. Jenny? No. Amy? No. Betty? No. Lady (in confusion): "No sir, I''m your son''s class teacher."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl eagerly asks her boyfriend "Where is my birthday gift?" The boyfriend points to a sports car across the street and says "You see that beautiful and expensive Ferrari on the other side of the road?" Girl gets excited and screams, "Yeah!" Boy, also excitedly, says, "Well, I got you the same color nail varnish!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used facebook for a few days and got addicted to it. I''ve been studying since I was 6. Why the hell am I not addicted to it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee. The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him ''Father''." The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him ''Your Grace''." The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal . . . When he enters a room everyone says ''Your Eminence''." The fourth Catholic man then says, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him ''Your Holiness''." Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well . . .?" She proudly replies, "I have a daughter, slim, tall, 38D breast, 24" waist and 34" hips. When she walks into a room, people say, ''Oh My God.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen. When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it''s probably obsolete. The first place to look for information is in the section of the manual where you least expect to find it. When the going gets tough, upgrade. For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction. He who laughs last probably made a back-up. A complex system that does not work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine. The number one cause of computer problems is computer solutions. A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want to do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and the run on HBOS in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan. In the last 7 hours Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches. Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song, while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived. Samurai Bank is soldiering on, following sharp cutbacks, Ninja Bank is reported to have taken a hit, but they remain in the black. Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband messages his wife on his cellphone: Hi, wat R U doing honey? Wife replies: I''m dying Husband is delighted and jumps with joy, but texts: OMG! How am I gonna live without u? Wife replies: u idiot. I''m dying my hair Husband: *@&!#*/ English', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guide - I welcome you all to Niagara Falls. This is the world''s biggest waterfall and the sound intensity of the waterfalls is so high that even 20 supersonic jet planes passing by cannot be heard. Now, I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagara Falls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('one day boodler is walking down the street minding his own (porn) business when suddenly a shady figure drags him into the alley. the huge man rapes poor boodler with his freakishly large 20 inch cock. boodler squeals like a pig. no one comes to help or look as the town is familiar with the sound. you see, boodler goes around town butt naked every sunday squealing like a pig. and today happens to be sunday. no one helps the poor bastard. boodler can take so much cock up his ass all at once. so he faints although the raping continues. next day morning, boodler finds himself in an alley. poor pig limps. his ass sore from the joy ride last night. now you can see him submitting jokes on wocka trying to score some shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cop to boy: Which of the two fighting in the street is your father? Boy: I don''t know. That''s what they''re fighting about!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is anybody STILL ALIVE ON WOCKA?????? I KNOW THIS ISNT A JOKE BUT THIS WAY THE ONLY WAY TO GET YOUR ATTENTION! HELLOOOO.... WAS THAT AN ECHO ECHO ECHO?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Imagine that you are on an adventure in a jungle with your best friend. Your friend gets bitten (on his manhood) by a poisonous snake while he was peeing. There isn''t a hospital for hundreds of miles. The question is, will you SUCK the poison out or will you just watch him die?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s grosser than gross? A pile of dead babies in a trash can. What''s grosser than that? The one at the bottom is still alive. What''s grosser than that? He has to eat his way to freedom. What''s grosser than that? He goes back for more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma was so fat, I was surprised that she could even jump!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('wocka is dead. no one comments anymore. no one submits jokes anymore. Can someone fix these glitches?- -when I write a comment and click on submit, half the time, the comment is not posted no matter how many times I try to re-post. -Even if I select "show all" for the full comments list, the hidden comments dont show up. wtf? I''m sorry this IS the only way I can get some attention since the forum is a ghost town.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama is so fat when she jumped she fell through the ground!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mamma is so fat it takes 1111111111111111111111111999999999thousand belts to fit her waist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo-mamma is so fat shes fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, I bought a packet of air. I was surprised to find a few potato chips inside it. -Dedicated to Lays', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only person in our town who can afford to go on a jaguar is a zoo-keeper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple is sitting on the porch sipping wine. The wife says, "I love you." The husband says, "Is that you or the wine talking?" The wife replies, "It''s me, talking to the wine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student aide, Sam found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn''t need Sam''s help to leave the hospital. After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let Sam wheel him to the elevator. On the way down Sam asked him if his wife was meeting him. "I don''t know," he said. "She is till upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the town''s preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was. Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children, "Go up there and take a look in the coffin and see if that''s your pa."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s my wife''s birthday today so I went out earlier in the week and deliberately got her a present that I knew she''d hate. True to form she opened it, took one look and said, "What the fuck would I want with an xbox? I''m going to take this back to the shop and ask for a refund." I can''t wait to see her little face when she gets arrested for looting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this old woman who heard a song called "Two Lips and Seven Kisses." She called up information after hearing the song on the radio to get the name of the record company. In dialing, she erroneously called up a gas station, and she asks, "Do you have "Two Lips and Seven Kisses?" The gas station attendant who answered the phone said, "No, but I have two nuts and seven inches!" So the woman asked, "Is this a record?" To which the man replied, "No, its average!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two doctors were in a hospital hallway one day complaining about Nurse Jenny. "She''s incredibly dumb. She does everything absolutely backwards." said one doctor. "Just last week, I told her to give a patient 2 milligrams of Percocet every 10 hours. She gave him 10 milligrams every 2 hours. He nearly died on us!" The second doctor said, "That''s nothing. Earlier this week, I told her to give a patient an enema every 24 hours. She tried to give him 24 enemas in one hour! The guy nearly exploded!" Suddenly, they hear this blood-curdling scream from down the hall. "Oh my God!" said the first doctor, "I just realized I told Nurse Jenny to prick Mr. Smith''s boil!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a woman says... This place is a mess! C''mon! You and I need to clean up! Your stuff is lying on the floor and You''ll have no clothes to wear if we don''t do laundry right now! What a man hears... blah blah blah blah blah C''MON! YOU AND I blah blah blah blah! blah blah blah blah ON THE FLOOR blah blah blah NO CLOTHES blah blah blah blah blah blah blah RIGHT NOW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A trucker goes into a whorehouse and hands the Madam five hundred dollars. He says, "I want your ugliest woman and a bologna sandwich." The Madam says, "For that kind of money, you could have one of my finest girls and surf and turf." The trucker says, "I''m not horny, I''m homesick."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('guy goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The girl behind the counter says, "What size?" He says, "I don''t know." She holds up a finger and says, "That big?" He says, "Bigger." She holds up three fingers and says, "That big?" He says, "Smaller?" She holds up two fingers and he says, "That''s it." She puts the two fingers in her mouth and says, "Medium."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man enters a barbershop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. "I have just the thing," says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. "Just place this between your cheek and gum." The client places the ball in his mouth and the barber proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced. After a few strokes, the client asks in garbled speech, "And what if I swallow it?" "No problem," says the barber. "Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man in the nursing home got a bottle of wine for his birthday. He talked the old lady in the next room into sharing it with him. After they were both totally bombed, he started groping the old lady and pulling at her clothes. He managed to get her blouse and bra off before she stopped him. She said, "I can''t do this, I have acute angina". The old guy says "God, I hope so, you''ve got the ugliest tits I''ve ever seen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honest to God true story. Wife (yelling from upstairs): Honey, I''m naked and the dog is loose in the front yard! Husband (downstairs): Hold on, I''ll be right up! She didn''t appreciate the humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just wrote this out of boredom. I do not care what you think. If you think this bad, I can''t help but say, "Go fuck yourself". A couple had been fighting for quite a while. The husband is just craving for sex. One night when they''re in bed: Husband: You know, it''s fun. Wife: Huh? Husband: It''s fun! Wife: What? What''s up with you all of a sudden? What''s fun? Husband: It''s fun! Wife: What is? Husband: IT''S fun! Wife: Grrr. Fuck you! Husband: YEAH, THAT!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WIKIPEDIA: I know everything. GOOGLE: I have everything. FACEBOOK: I know everybody. INTERNET : You''re all nothing without me. ELECTRICITY: Keep talking, bitches!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the witch buy a computer? A: She needed the spellcheck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama has one leg and a bicycle. Yo mama has 4 eyes and 2 pair of sunglasses. Yo mama has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it. Yo mama has one hand and a Clapper. Yo mama has green hair and thinks she''s a tree. Yo mama has one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you''re saying. Yo mama has 10 fingers--all on the same hand. Yo mama has a glass eye with a fish in it. Yo mama has a short leg and walks in circles. Yo mama has a short arm and can''t applaude. Yo mama has so many freckles she looks like a hamburger! Yo mama has three fingers and a banjo. Yo mama has a wooden leg with a kickstand on it. Yo mama has a bald head with a part and sideburns. Yo mama has a wooden leg with branches. Yo mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tounge is in jail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma so fat and retarded that she thinks shes skinny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Windows customer said when he closes his windows, they disappear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so FAT that when she turned around,it was her birhtday!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond was seen walking in a local mall wearing nothing but shoes, a shirt and nothing else.'' When security stopped her and asked her what she thought she was doing, She replied, "I saw a sign that said take half off and save money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: The reason why we see lightening before we hear thunder is because light travels faster than sound. Blonde student: How do you explain a CLAPPER?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Japanese and an American are sitting next to each other in an airplane. The Japanese turns to the American and says "We are so technically advanced that we have exact replicas of ourselves so we can be at two places at the same time". He continues, "Therefore, I can be at work and at the same time have sex with my wife." All this while the American stays silent, then suddenly gets up and starts shaking his hips back and forth. The Japanese, confused, asks "What the hell are you doing?" The American, still shaking his hips, replies "I''m fucking my wife via Bluetooth!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three moms. . A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde. They were all talking one day and the brunette says "Oh my gosh y''all I went through my daughter''s purse the other day to get some gum, and I found an ounce of weed. I can''t believe she smokes weed" They comfort her, and the redhead says "Yeah, well I found a fake I. D. In my daughter''s purse. I can''t believe she has one". So they all comfort her. Then the blonde says "That''s nothing. I found a condom in my daughter''s purse. I just cannot believe she has a penis"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man and woman went to his house to have sex when he stopped her to say "I still live with my parents and me and my brother share bunk beds so if you want to change positions say "lettuce" and if you want to go faster say "tomatos" So they were getting it on and she was screaming "lettuce, lettuce, tomatos, lettuce, tomatos, tomatos" Suddenly the younger brother (on the bottom bunk) said "Could you stop making sandwiches your getting mayonase on me"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with three young mothers and their small children. "You all have obsessions," he observed. To the first mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You''ve even named your daughter Candy." He turned to the second mom. "Your obsession is money. Again, it manifests itself in your child''s name, Penny." At this point, the third mother got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, "Come on, Dick, let''s go', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blonde goes into a store. She gets an item and walks up to the cashier. She says,"I''d like to buy this TV". He says,"Sorry, we don''t sell to blondes". The next day, she dyes her hair red and goes back in the store, but the same thing happens. Finally, she shaves her head and goes back in. When she tries to buy it for the third time, the man refuses. She says, "How the hell do you know I''m blonde?". He replied, "First of all, that''s a microwave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''''Ugh, that''s the ugliest baby I''ve ever seen!'''' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''''The driver just insulted me!'''' The man says: ''''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I''ll hold your monkey for you.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me . . . then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there was this man that went to a beach completely naked even though the beach was a non-nude beach. But the man thought and thought looking around. Nobody is here so he doesn''t care. He takes off his towel and lays down with a newspaper to cover his privates just in case. Soon comes a little girl that asks "Sir, what''s under the newspaper?" The man replies with "it''s a birdy and never ever touch it." He soon falls asleep. Later on when he wakes up, he''s in the hospital feeling immense pain around his private area. The doctors ask whathappened and all he could remember was the girl at the beach. Later on the cops arrive at her house asking what she had done. She said "well I was playing with the birdy but then it spit this white stuff at me. I got really mad. So I broke it''s neck, stepped on it''s eggs, and burned it''s nest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this lady and she really wanted to have sex, but she was to scared to ask her husband so she went to a gypsy and told her her problem. The gypsy rummaged around in a chest and pulled out a pickle jar with a penis in it, and said "All you have to do is open the jar and say ''Pickle penis my vigina'' and it will start having sex with you". So later she tries out the pickle penis and it works great. That is until her husband walks in and he shouts "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT" and the woman says "It''s a pickled penis" Unfortunately her husband replied "PICKLE PENIS MY ASS"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you kill a dumb blonde? Put something shiny on the bottom of a pool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What s green and hangs from a tree??? Giraffe Boogers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knew a blonde that was so stupid that....... * she called me to get my phone number. * she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate." * she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. *she tried to put M&M''s in alphabetical order. *she sent me a fax with a stamp on it. *she tried to drown a fish. *she thought a quarterback was a refund. *she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death. *she tripped over a cordless phone. *she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. *she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store. *she studied for a blood test. *she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats. *when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved. *when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead. *when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said"Airport Left" she turned around and went home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde that... Couldn''t learn to water ski because she couldn''t find a lake with a slope. Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said "2 to 4 years" Couldn''t call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button. When asked what the capital of California was; answered "C". Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125. After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained that the other swimmers were using their arms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don''t mind, but I feel much luckier when I''m completely nude." With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!" As the dice came to a stop she jumped up and down and squealed... "YES! YES! I WON, I WON!" She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and her clothes andquickly departed... The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I don''t know - I thought you were watching."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple (BATTERY AND BOODLER) was attending mass. About halfway through, BOODLER leans over and says to BATTERY, "I just let out a silent fart; what do you think I should do?" BATTERY replied, "That was sexy. Put a new battery in your vibrator; then let''s go home and fuck our brains out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The armies of the opposition have neared Washington, Paris and London. The governments of US, France and London did nothing about it. ''Sorry! We need to bomb (long list of African and Middle East countries) first.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges? - You can''t have everything, where would you put it? - Isn''t having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool? - What hair color do they put on the driv', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the eve of the First Boer War, thousands of blondes lined the streets campaigning for animal rights. ''If it''s illegal for human women, it''s gotta be the same for swine,'' said one activist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a fragment of a crossword puzzle. Note that this crossword puzzle contains abbreviations and acronyms. S O _ Clue: An insult related to a female animal. Answer: Sow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a fragment of a crossword puzzle. P _ O _ _ _ Clue: Something that is often brown and hard to clean. Answer: Poodle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer is talking to a *fellow* politician. ''I''m going to Switzerland next month,'' said the honest politician. ''Oh really?'' asked the lawyer. ''Which bank?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the father buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school? - Bison!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Bob the Butcher is 5''11'''' what does he weigh? -Meat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Martian lands to plunder, pillage and burn. He goes up to the owner of the first house he sees and says, "I''m a Martian just arrived from the other side of the galaxy. We''re here to destroy your civilisation, pillage and burn. What do you think about that?" The owner replies, "I don''t have an opinion. I''m a chartered accountant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don''t? Depreciation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy dies whilst making love to his wife. A few days later the undertaker calls her and says, "Your husband still has a hard-on, what shall I do with it?" The wife replies, "Cut it off and shove it up his ass!" The undertaker does as he is told. On the day of the funeral the wife visits her husband for the last time and sees a tear rolling down his face, so she whispers in his ear, "It fucking hurts doesn''t it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men go on holiday abroad together. The tourist office informs them that there is only one hotel in town with vacancies. The guys go along there, only to be told by receptionist at the hotel that there is just one available room left in the hotel. They are not happy, but as it is their only option, they take the room for one evening and share its only bed. That night, they all enjoy a good night''s sleep. In the morning, the guy on the right side of the bed says, "I dreamt I had the best wank last night." The guy on the left side says, "That''s funny, I had the exact same dream!". The guy in the middle says, "I dreamt I was skiing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks by a travel agency and notices a sign in the window, "Cruise Special -- $99!" So she goes inside, lays her money on the counter and says, "I''d like the $99 cruise special, please." The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room, ties her to a large inner tube, then drags her out the back door and downhill to the river, where he pushes her in and sends her floating. A second blonde comes by a few minutes later, sees the sign, goes inside, lays her money on the counter, and asks for the $99 special. She too is tied to an inner tube and sent floating down the river. Somehow drifting into stronger current, she eventually catches up with the first blonde. They float side by side for a while before the first blonde asks, "Do they serve refreshments on this cruise?" The second blonde replies,"They didn''t last year...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newlywed couple had just arrived in their honeymoon suite. After unpacking, the husband took off his pants. "Put these on," he said to his wife. She did and they were obviously much too large. "There''s no way I can wear these - they''re way too big," she said. "Good! Now you know who wears the pants in this family," replied the husband. Flustered, the wife removed her panties, and handing them to her husband said, "Put these on." The husband looked at the tiny panties and said, "There''s no way I can get into these." To which the wife replied, "You''re damn right! At least not until you change your attitude!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Illinois man left the snowballed streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher''s wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen: Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Your Loving Husband. P.S. Sure is hot down here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man, trying to understand the nature of God, asked Him, "God, how long is a million years to you?" God answered, "A million years is like a minute." Then the man asked, "God, how much is a million dollars to you?" And God replied, "A million dollars is like a penny." Finally, the man asked, "God, could you give me a penny?" And God said, "In a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fact of life: After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says W T F', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual sign outside a house: The dog is okay. Beware of the owner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The New York Times, among other papers, recently published a new Hubble Space Telescope photograph of distant galaxies colliding. Of course, astronomers have had pictures of colliding galaxies for quite some time now, but with the vastly improved resolution provided by the Hubble, you can actually see the lawyers rushing to the scene.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: What is it that brought you here? Patient: An ambulance. Why?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time I was walking and I saw a deer then a turkey comes out and the turkey and deer interact by speaking in human words then all of a sudden a really bright light formed and the deer and turkey have fused to make a durkey a dear and turkey combined it has a head of a deer and the body of the turkey after that this was on the news and they said it could be seen from Africa(No permanent eye damage was reported)so then a passer by the next day(I was in that same area where the turkey and deer fused)took the durkey and that guy who ate it became that same turkey(The one the deer talked to before fusing)but the good ole friend the deer was gone that passer by became the turkey but the deer got eaten the normal way.This should keep you laughing for hours', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A spanish speaking person was eating breakfast they where having english muffins the rest of the family was English(The Spanish speaking guy was adopted)so he was eating an English muffin after that he tried to say Uno but instead was completely English Wierd', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went... then it dawned on me. Reading a book on levitation... couldn''t put it down. I should have been sad when I lost my flashlight... but I was de-lighted. I was wondering why the frisbee got bigger as it got closer to me... then it hit me. I gave away dead batteries... free of charge! I had amnesia once... maybe twice. See more: http://punraccoon.tumblr.com/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('33% of men use their left hand to pee. 67% of men use their right hand. 89% wanted to know why I''m watching them pee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a kindergarten teacher, who was incidentally blonde, gave everybody a set of crayons and told them to draw something with it. The teacher noticed that Little Johnny had drawn a sun enclosed in a box with rays shining out of it. ''Johnny,'' said the teacher with a confused look. ''Did your grandparents come from Japan?'' ''No, Macedonia,'' said the colour blind child.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you look up Yahoo! Answers on Yahoo! search, it tells you it''s deleted according to community guidelines. When you look it up on Google Search, it''s restored according to Google Cache''s workings.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dog Minton has eaten my shuttle cock. Bad Minton!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The European union has decided the only way to avoid Greece defaulting on its debts is to replace the government and civil service with 300 Spartans !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dreams are like underpants. You''ve got ''em, but you can''t prove you do by showing it to everyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I were at an outdoor shopping mall, and I came across what I thought was a ''life-sized'' chess board. So I began playing chess solo. Ten moves in, my wife comes by and says, "Honey, that''s a crche!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the world''s sharpest thing? A fart! It goes through your pants without leaving a hole!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is striped and lays eggs? A chicken in jail!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child: Mum, can I wear those really nice jeans with the hole in the knee to church? Mother: No honey, you can''t wear holy jeans to church!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Johnny, where is your homework? Johnny: Its on Facebook. I''ve uploaded a copy and tagged you. Please login and verify it later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Barney was driving his "Drugmobile" down the street and a cop pulled him over, said; "Something screwy is goin'' on here, hey don''t I know you!" and was about to put handcuffs on Barney but, Barney quickly said: "Oh crap, there''s a J-Walker" and ran away to his drug mobile. The cop said: "Come here J-Walker". "Works every time" Barney said as he drove away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, I saw you in Dunkin'' donuts yesterday!! You''re the one ordering triple chocolate, double vanilla, quadrupal cinnamon and double whip cream dounut filled with sprinkles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three blokes are driving around, drinking beers and having a laugh when the driver looks in the mirror and sees the flashing lights of a police car telling him to pull over. The other two are really worried. "What are we going to do with our beers? We''re in trouble!" "No," the driver says, "it''s OK, just pull the label off your bottle and stick them on your foreheads, and the bloke pulls over. The police officer then walks up and says, "You lads were swerving all around the road back there. Have you been drinking?" "Oh, no, officer," says the driver, pointing to his forehead, "We''re trying to give up, so we''re on the patch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A beautiful, sexy, good looking lady was sitting next to a guy in a plane... The lady said to him, "Can you help me remove something from my breast please?" The exciting young man replied, "Wow! It will be my pleasure... So what is it?" "Your eyes, idiot!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think my smartphone is broken. I keep pressing the Home button, but I''m still working.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old Bubba was fishing along the Bayou for catfish one day when he spots a water moccasin slithering across the water with a toad in its mouth. Being a longtime fisherman, he knows the best bait for large catfish are toads. In a flash, Bubba grabs the snake from behind and carefully removes the toad from its mouth and puts the toad in his side bag. Fearing the angry snake would bite him; Bubba grabs his bottle of daddy''s moonshine from his pocket and carefully pours 2 drops into the snake''s mouth. The snake''s eyes glaze over and quickly go limp. Bubba carefully places the snake back in the water. A few hours later, Bubba is just about to head back home, when he feels something tapping on his leg. He looks down and is amazed to see the same water moccasin with 2 frogs in its mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every time I hear the dirty word "Exercise", I wash my mouth out with chocolate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today''s school kids are spending less time at recess than their predecessors. Experts say if the trends continues, future Congressmen may not have enough experience goofing off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sitting next to each other on a plane are a blond woman and a lawyer. To make the plane ride a bit more interesting, the lawyer suggests that he and the blond play a game. "We each take turns asking a question, and if you answer wrong you must give me $5 and if I answer wrong I give you $5." The blond woman says nothing. "Okay," says the man, "if I answer wrong, I have to give you $50, but if you answer wrong you only have to give me $5." "Alright," says the blond, "you go first." The man asks her "what is the distance from Earth to the nearest star?" the woman says nothing and hands $5 to the man. "What has five legs, is covered in pink and purple spots, and lives on a hill?" The lawyer, never having heard this riddle, gave the woman $50. "Wait," he said, "what is the answer to that question?" Without saying a word, the woman hands him $5.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old lady walks into a bank and says, "I would like to set up an account." The man at the desk says, "Okay, how much would you like to deposit?" The woman replies, "$5,000." "Wow!" says the man, "where did you get all of that?" "I like to make bets." "What type of bets?" The woman replied, "Tomorrow when, I will come in, you will have a butterfly tattoo an your left buttock. I will bet all the money I am about to deposit." "Deal," says the man. The next day the old woman walked in again with her lawyer. the man at the counter pulled down his pants to show the old woman his empty left buttock. "I win!" he said as the woman handed him his money. Behind her, the lawyer put his head in his hands. "What''s wrong with that guy?" he asked. The old woman replied, "He is just a sore loser. I bet him $10,000 that the man at the counter of this bank would moon us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was solving a crossword. For a four-letter word there was a clue: Look at the picture ! The man entered: I see .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- How many blonds do you need to change a lightbulb ? - Hundred. One holds the lightbulb and the other ninety nine rotates the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- What does a blond say to a two headed monster ? - Hello ! Hello !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- How to make a blond busy ? - Put her in a circle room and tell her to find a corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (NULL, '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('there was a man who lived in a small town who did not talk much to his neighbors. the only thing they knew about him was the fact that he always had the precise time, because every day at 3:00 pm (no later, no sooner) he took a walk, and came back at exactly 3:30 pm (no later, no sooner). this man was always so perfectly on time that everyone set their clocks to him, including the clock tower. one day one of the man''s neighbors walked up to the old man and asked, "how do you keep your clocks so precise?" "simple," replied the old man, "i just set it to the old clock tower." who''s clock was set off whose?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael and Beth are married, Beth is a smoker but Michael thinks smoking is horrible. One night she started smoking after they finished having sex and Michael said, "Would you please stop smoking, you''re going to kill yourself." Beth, in return, said, "Sometimes I just need to get in a smoke after sex, do you have a problem with that?" He replied, "Yes, because they stunt your growth among other things." Beth asked Michael if he''s ever smoked, to which he proudly said no. With a smug Beth lowered her gaze to his groin and said, "So, what''s your excuse?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover? The position of the dirt bag.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is divorce so expensive? Because it''s worth it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a room together? 100 people who don''t do dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two mates calles mik and mak went to the Australia vs England game. It was mik`s birthday, and mik gave mak a ride and mak took mik`s birthday present with him.He went to get it while mik wached the 4th over. Mak said to mik i`ve got some bad news for you buddy. Your car was actually a car bomb and blew up...but mik interupted by saying Well makky, mate I`ve got some bad news for you. what? mak asked. Ricky ponting`s out,he replied', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat that when she took her first step everyone thought there was an earthquake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma so ugly when she looked at a baby, the baby turned to stone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to put in a light bulb? 1000. 1 to screw in the light bulb; 1 to give the light bulb to the person who''ll screw in a light bulb and 998 to find the light bulb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a blonde busy? Write with a sharpie and tell her to erase it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if someone is a true blonde? They clean their hair with air conditioner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the Chinese nickname for the Dutch politician Geert Wilders? Answer: Dum Thing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girl told me she was trying to lose weight, so I said, "Do whatever makes you happy inside. Just keep in mind that your weight''s just a number. There''s no number in the world to measure how beautiful you are . . . unless you include negative numbers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old she met a T Rex in pre-school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the sauna that serves food? Their specialty is steamed mussels.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('god told moses to come forth but he tripped on a banana peel and came fifth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Class was starting, and the teacher was taking attendance. She noticed that two of her top students were missing. Right after that, Billy came in. She asks him, "Why are you late?" He replies, "I was just on top of Blueberry Hill." The teacher tells him to sit. A few minutes later Timmy comes in. The teacher asks him, "Why are you late?" He replies, "I was just on top of Blueberry Hill." She tells him to sit. A few minutes later a new girl walks into class. The teacher says, "Oh you must be the new girl. What''s your name?" The girl replies, "I''m Blueberry Hill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whoever said nothing is impossible has never tried slamming a revolving door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so fat she walked into the GAP and filled it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Sixteen. One to screw it in and fifteen to form a support group.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Santa only has three Ho''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw on the news a little boy being carried up to the sky. I got scared cause I thought Michael Jackson was ordering take-out from Heaven.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple was driving down the street and they hear a siren going off. They pull over to the side and wait for the cop to come over. The cop comes up and they see that it''s Officer Alf. The man groans cause Alf is the rudest cop in town. Alf asks the man for his license and registration. The man gives it to him and Alf rudely rips it out of his hands and tells the man to wait. When he comes back he sneezes and his face turns red. The man says bless you and asks why his face is so red. Alf replies, "I get this way when it''s about to rain. Anyway, here is your ticket for speeding." He walks away gruffly. The man looks up to see nothing but a clear blue sky. He starts driving again; a few minutes later it starts to pour down. He arrives home grumbling. His wife turns to him and says, "I guess rude Alf the red knows rain dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hitler walks into a bar; he''s depressed. He goes up to the counter and orders three shots. The bartender gives them to him and Hitler downs them. Hitler orders three more shots; the bartender gives them to him and Hitler downs them. Hitler orders three more shots. The bartender asks Hitler why he''s so depressed. Hitler replies, "Give me the shots and I''ll tell you," so the bartender gives him the shots and he downs them. Then the bartender asks why he''s so depressed. Hitler replies, "I just killed six millions Jews and a clown." The bartender replies, "Why a clown?" Hitler says, "See? Nobody cares about the Jews!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, a redhead and a blonde all apply for the same job. The manager says, "I can only hire one of you so I''m going to ask you each a question and whoever answers it correctly gets the job." He takes the brunette into the room and asks her, "How many D''s in Indiana Jones?" She replies, "One." He brings the redhead into the room and asks her the same question. She thinks for a moment and says, "One." He then brings the blonde into the room and asks her the same question; "How many D''s in Indiana Jones?" She thinks for a little. She counts on her fingers, counts on her toes, wiggles her ears, sticks out her tongue and finally comes up with, "Thirty Six." The rest of them ask her, "How the hell did you come up with thirty six?!" She replies with a smile on her face, "Da da da da, da da da." (Sing the Indiana Jones theme song)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Santa Claus, a Boy Scout, and a smart blonde jump out of a plane. Who lands first? The Boy Scout, because the other two don''t exist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pope, the smartest man in the world, a father, and a son were in a plane that was going to crash. There were only three parachutes in the plane. The Pope says to them, "I need a parachute because I am worshiped by many people of religion." So he takes a parachute and jumps. The smartest man in the world says, "I am the smartest man in the world so I deserve a parachute." He takes a parachute and jumps. The father then looks at the son and says, "I have lived a long life and I think you should take a parachute because you have so much to live for." The little boy looks at the dad and says, "It''s alright daddy. We can both go. The smartest man in the world took my backpack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Dominicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. Dominican one to hold the bulb and Dominican two to turn Dominican one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Billy, tell me the periodic for water. Billy:Okay. H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O. Teacher: What makes you say that? Billy: You said it was H to O.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross a dinosaur, a tiger, a crocodile, a spider, and a elephant? I don''t know but you better get out of it''s way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens to you if you can not read? Well, since you''ll probably be staying in Kindergarten, less homework!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe:Why did the cow cross the road? Bob:The chicken quit. Joe:why did the chicken quit? Bob: He wanted a job that would give him more buck-buck-bucks. Joe: Hey! Why is why is that duck crossing the road? Bob: I don''t know. Maybe the cow qu- Hey! Why am I talking to you? I don''t even know you! Joe: Why don''t you kno- Bob: Shut up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever since Rhianna got dumped by her boyfriend, she put all the stuff that was his or made her remember him she put : " to the left to the left... in the box on the left..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Science Teacher: Now, now class settle down. Today we will be learning about Biology. Girl: Oh boy! An entire unit about buying! I''ve bought a lot of things like earrings, and rings, and necklaces, and bracelets... Math Teacher: Okay class. Today we will be learning about subtraction. Boy: Hooray! I know everything there is to know about sub tracks because my father owns a train station. did you know that sub tracks are like regular tracks but...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Basketball hoops are like misdemeanor. The more I miss it da meanor I get.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy and his mom were playing the new game of life were you could put your house were you wanted it. The boy put it on the left side. On his next turn he moved it onto the right side. The mom asked why he did that and he said, "I wanted to live on the other side of life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the 12 watt lightbulb drop out of school? It wasn''t very bright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Register lots of accounts, with each account voting for it as least comedy. If its average comedy drops below 0.5, it will be automatically deleted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trousers: Hot off the press . . . . / - - - I regret writing that. Remorse Code Does anyone here have a giant catapult? No? It was a long shot.. Saw two space hoppers outside a nightclub. I said: ''Who are you?'' They said: ''We''re the bouncers'' I had a TV Show about trees. But it got axed. What do you get if you cross a human with a dog? Arrested. I can speak to kettles. Because I''m boilingual. Saw an artist dressed all in black. It was Vincent Van Goth. Hotel receptionists are bit inappropriate, aren''t they? They all just sit there, checking people out. My girlfriend said: "Why do you always lie?" I said: "Because it''s easier than standing up" I think I got a phone-call about the world''s worst queue. It was a very bad line', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News! Daisy the Dalmation is entering the presidential election along with Mitt Romney and Barack Obama.Right now we are going to hear her campaign speech. " Voting for your next president will be very difficult to chose so let me make it easier. You can vote for the white guy or the black guy. You vote for me you get both.!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Al Gore is out jogging one morning, notices a little boy on the corner with a box. Curious, he runs over to the child and says, "What''s in the box kid?" To which the little boy says, "Kittens, they''re brand new kittens." Al Gore laughs and says, "What kind of kittens are they?" "Democrats," the child says. "Oh that''s cute," Al Gore says and he runs off. A couple of days later Al Gore is running with his buddy Bill Clinton and he spies the same boy with his box just ahead. Al Gore says to Bill, "You gotta check this out," and they both jog over to the boy with the box. Al Gore says, "Look in the box Bill, isn''t that cute? Look at those little kittens. Hey kid tell my friend Bill what kind of kittens they are." The boy replies, "They''re Republicans." "Whoa!", Al Gore says, "I came by here the other day and you said they were Democrats. What''s up?" "Well," the kid says, "Their eyes are open now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called when your pet snake doesn''t feel right? -reptile dysfunction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what''s the difference between here and there? The letter T! :) (Take away the T in there and you''ve got here!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gay pornstar doesn''t take as many balls to the face as my 4 year old son playing soccer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day I was standing in the park wondering how frisbees get bigger when they get closer. Then it hit me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary had a little lamb, fries and a coke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the butcher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mik: "Do skunks have a good sense of smell?" Mak: "No! If they did, they''d jump off a cliff!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A waiter on a ship said to a boarding lion "sir, do you want anything of the chef''s special?" The lion said "nah..I''ll look at the passenger list,though!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t Megan Fox run from the man-eating lion? Because she was a woman. *Told to me by a 7-year-old*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mik:Darn it! There''s only 2 chips in my bowl.Damn you,chips! Mak: Aargh! you made me so angry I am gonna punch them! Mak punches the chips. Mik: WHOAH! you made 2 big chips into 20 small ones! Mak: I AM JESUS OF THE DORITOS!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Music student: We played the beatles last night! Gym student:who won?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, I heard that a good friend of mine was outside during a thunderstorm and got struck by lightning. I was a bit shocked, but not as much as he was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t know much about prison, but it sounds like a pain in the ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, I was just walking around, and something really strange happened. Every single black person that night took one look at me and decided to punch me square in the face. Repeatedly. It hurt. And I''m not just talking about one or two, I''m saying every single black person beat the crap out of me that night. I don''t know why. I didn''t do anything. I didn''t say anything. I didn''t even look at anybody funny. But after that, I did stop dressing up as a ghost for Halloween.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night I was feeling lonely, so I went to my girlfriend''s house. She wasn''t expecting me, but I was able to calm her down. She was a bit hesitant, but I didn''t think anything of it. I got her into the bed finally, and you know what happens next. In the morning, when I woke up she was still asleep. So I got up and left quietly. On the way back home I felt a little bad but I didn''t know why. And then it hit me. I don''t have a girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old she rode a limosarus to her wedding!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not even sure this is funny (although it was at the time), but it was just a random happening: I was texting my friend and playing temple run at the same time, and something occurred to me. I said, "If I were a Temple Run character, no one would buy me... I cannot slide on my back, jump over tall objects, run fast (most definitely not), or pick up coins by running through them. I would die in the first 30 seconds." He replied, "I would buy u, just so I could get the achievement of sexy seven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Katie was at Sunday school one day. The teacher asked the class "Who is someone in your life that worships God by always speaking His name?" Little Katie raised her hand and said "The fifth grade teacher at my school! Every time we pass by her room on the way to art I hear her say "I swear to God I have the worst behaved class in the world!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom! Deaf kids at school are making fun of me. "What did they say?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy was walking in a shopping center with his mom, and suddenly she stopped to pick up a penny. When she reached out for it, he saw armpit hair. Frightened, he said, "You''re not my mom! I''m calling the police." The man pulled off his mask and said, "Okay, you got me. But tell me one thing. How did you know I wasn''t your mom?" "Because my mom''s not Jewish."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a new dog last week. She''s a black lab and border collie mix, and still a puppy. I take her with me everywhere I go. But when I took her to the vet to get her shots, they told me I had to put her down. I''ve only had this dog for a week. Seven days. I wanted to keep holding her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the diver angry at the diving board? Because it flipped him off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I asked a religious truck driver what his CB handle is. His answer: "My handle''s ''Messiah''." (Get it? Sounds like "Handel''s Messiah.")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The word ''function'' should never function as a verb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''It is Christmas time and a man and a woman go out for a meal. After the first two courses, everything is well until the dessert. The man messes up and says something inappropriate to the woman while having their Christmas pudding. The woman walks away in anger. Then the man says, "Please don''t desert me; this is our first date."''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mik and mak are having a pillow fight. Mak whacks mik hard. Mik yells "are you jamaican because ja maican me crazy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so fat, she put on a disney shirt and mickey mouse got diabetes. yo momma is so ugly, she makes blind people cry. yo momma is so fat, she has to hire people to look at her toes. yo momma is so fat, when God said let there be light, he had to ask her to move out of the way. yo momma is so stupid, she failed a blood test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bet you I could stop gambling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the one about the home security guard who got fired for saving his boss''s life? One day the guard dreamed the his boss was going to be in a plane crash on a business trip to Zimbabwe. Upon learning that his boss was soon going to be flying to Zimbabwe he told his boss about the dream he had, and convinced his boss to cancel it. The next day on the news they learned that the plane did indeed crash. The boss gave him a reward, and then fired him on the spot, saying that a good guard shouldn''t be sleeping on the job!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was strolling down a street. As he passed a large building with a fence around it, he heard a group of people chanting "Thirteen, thirteen, thirteen" over and over again. Curious, he tried to see over the fence, but couldn''t. Then he spotted a hole in the wood. He put his eye to the hole. He just managed to spy some old people sitting in deckchairs chanting, before a finger came out of nowhere and poked him in the eye. As he staggered back, the old people started chanting, "Fourteen, fourteen, fourteen..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and her child were at a wedding. A little boy looks at his mom and says, "Mommy, why does the girl wear white?" His mom replies, "The bride is in white because she''s happy and this is the happiest day of her life." The boy thinks about this, and then says, "Well then, why is the boy wearing black?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy, about eight years old, was at the store picking out a large box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over and, trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do. "Oh, no laundry," the boy said. "I''m going to wash my dog." "But you shouldn''t use this to wash your dog. It''s very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he''ll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him." But the boy was not stopped by this and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his dog. About a week later the boy was back in the store doing some shopping. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing. "Oh, he died," the boy said. The grocer said, "I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your dog." "Well," the boy replied, "I don''t think it was the detergent that killed him." "Oh I''m sorry. How did he die?" "I think it was the spin cycle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on an interstate road for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through his hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80mph, he suddenly saw a flashing red and blue light behind him. "There ain''t no way they can catch a Mercedes," he thought to himself, and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100 110 and finally 120 with the lights still behind him. "What on earth am I doing?" he thought and pulled over. The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car. "I''ve had a tough shift and this is my last pull over. I don''t feel like more paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven''t heard before you can go!" "Last week my wife ran off with a cop," the man said, "and I was afraid you were trying to give her back!" "Have a nice night," said the officer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer. "Certainly, sir, that''ll be 1 cent." "ONE CENT!" exclaimed the guy, the barman replied "Yes." So the guy glances over at the menu, and he asks "Could I have a nice juicy T-Bone steak, with chips, peas, and a fried egg?" "Certainly sir,"replies the bartender, but all that comes to real money." "How much money?" inquires the guy. "Four cents", he replies. "FOUR cents!" exclaims the guy. "Where''s the Guy who owns this place?" The barman replies, "Upstairs with my wife." The guy says, "What''s he doing with your wife?" The bartender replies, "Same as what I''m doing to his business."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter, and you didn''t even pay for your sandwich!". "Hey, man, I''m a PANDA!". the panda shouts back. "Look it up!". The manager opens his dictionary and reads: ''Panda: a tree-dwelling mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mik walked home from work and saw 4 people dressed in grim reaper suits. He ran home. The next time,the next time and 6 more walks for home, he decided to confront them. He yelled "who ARE you"????!!! They chased him into a wall. "s-s- Show yourself" he squeaked. They took their masks off and yelled "Hi, we''re the wiggles!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why wasn''t Jesus born in Japan? He couldn''t find three wise men or a virgin there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the computer get sick? He left his windows open', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Dad is great at raising kids, if he can remember which are his.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All women are emotional drag queens, and i married their queen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas so fat that when she got on the electric scales, it read one at a time please.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blind German? A not see!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Long ago I gave my kid an iPod. Last year he talked me into buying him an iPhone. This year he said he needed an iPad. I asked what the i- means and he said that''s the way Apple name their products. Now he''s asking for an i7 laptop. My goodness, Apple have made so many things they''ve now run out of names!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: Will you marry me? Girl: Are you kidding? You''re a geek while I need a man with a big bank account and a nice house! Boy: I have 1000 GBs in the cloud. Girl: Come on, that won''t even buy us a cabin in Texas! Boy: You don''t know sh*t, my EC2 account can buy a farm in New York if you wish!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are eating a hamburger at a fast food place. 1st Guy- Does your hamburger taste funny? 2nd Guy- No just yours. Mine doesn''t have a sense of humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One woman to another woman Woman- Those firemen are hot. Other Woman- Yeah they are nice looking. Woman- No. I mean they just came out of that burning building. They''re hot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the dog say to the driver who was driving behind him? Get off my tail!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man says to his girlfriend You''re the only woman on this planet I won''t. Oh by the way, I''m taken a trip to Mars next week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(I put the pun words in CAPS) A man was smoking in a no smoking restaurant. Mik went up to him and said "sir, you''ll have to leave''. The smoker said to mik "what if I dont wanna, yeah?, what''ll ya do then?" Mak walked up to the smoking man''s face and said ''leave. this is a no smoking restaurant. no BUTTS about it". The man said "fine" and walked out and jumped on his bike. Mik said to mak " man, has that bike been through a RECYCLING machine"? Word spread, and no smokers smoked in that restaurant ever again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a 4 letter sport that starts with a T? Golf. (Golf starts with a tee!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what the secret of an islamic marriage is? The man get''s to see a striptease every night!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey! Football team! Get off the band field!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Band Class is the only class where you can blow it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The blond asked for peanuts on the plane, but she once she got them, she gave them back to the stewardess and asks her to check if there really are peanuts in the bag. The stewardess asks why, to which the blond responds: "The bag says ''May Contain Nuts''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve Got The Wrong(est) Number (Note: our customer support number is close to a local driving school''s number.) Me: "Thank you for calling. How may I help you?" Customer: "How much for my daughter?" Me: "Um..." Customer: "She''s 16. It''s her first time. She needs training." Me: "Sir, I think you want the driving school." Customer: "Oh, what do you guys do?" Me: "Adult websites." Customer: "Oh...OH! Oh my God!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(A teen approaches my cash register very slowly.) Me: "Can I help you?" Customer: "Gimme all the f***ing medicine!" (The teen pulls out an airsoft pistol with orange tip still glued to the front.) Me: "The pharmacy is in the back of the store." Customer: "Oh...okay." (He holsters the air-soft gun in his belt and darts down the aisles to the back of the store. My manager comes out of the back room because of the commotion.) Manager: "Who was that?" Me: "Some kid looking for drugs. He went back to the pharmacy." Manager: "Why didn''t you call the police?" (The teen runs screaming from the back of the store out of the front door followed closely by the pharmacy technician, a 35 year old boxer built like a fridge.) Me: "Doug started working today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Employee: *making out a rain check* "Okay, so I''m just going to look on the computer and check if any other locations have this item." Nice customer: "Okay, thanks." Angry customer: "Stop f***ing socializing and do your g**d*** job!" Employee: "Sir, please don''t be abusive, I''m just checking our other loc-" Angry customer: "I don''t care! DO YOUR JOB!" (At this point, the angry customer moves toward the counter in a very threatening way. The customer behind HIM, a super-fit guy in a UFC jacket, steps in. Mr. UFC grabs the angry customer in a CHOKE HOLD and drags him outside, followed quickly by management, and to the applause of the staff and customers inside the store.) (The angry customer was banned from the store and Mr. UFC got a gift card.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(Often I enter the beer cooler with shorts, a t-shirt and some rubber-hand work gloves on.) Me: *walks out of the cooler* Customer: "Are you f***ing insane? It''s freezing in there. Me: "I don''t mind it." Customer: "That''s bulls***! You know it''s cold. Why would you lie to me?" Me: "Excuse me? I''m pretty sure I know my own tolerance and I''m working so I get a bit warm, even in there." Customer: "WARM!? In a COOLER!? You''re a G**D*** LIAR! How can you be WARM in THERE!" Me: "I''m Canadian, and ever since my igloo melted I only feel at home in there." Customer: "Oh, I didn''t know. I''m sorry for your loss."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(A man comes to my register with a mint chocolate candy bar.) Me: "Anything else?" Customer: "Can you break a $100 bill?" Me: "Actually, I can''t. We just opened and I haven''t gone to the bank today." Customer: "Oh, no! Do you know anywhere I can get change? I need this candy right away!" (At this point I notice his panicked look. Coupled with the fact that he''s buying the most unappetizing candy in the store, I jump to a conclusion.) Me: "Sir, these aren''t for you, are they?" Customer: "No." Me: "Did your pregnant wife send you out at 8 in the morning to buy this candy?" Customer: "Yes." Me: "For the love of God, man! Get these home to her before you''re in even more trouble! You can come back and pay me later!" (The customer bolts out the door. He later came back, visibly calmer, and paid.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(I am shelving DVDs in a library when a man comes in with a boy who appears to be autistic. The boy sees a movie about Thanksgiving.) Boy: "Thanksgiving! I love Thanksgiving! I''m thankful... I''m thankful for... I''m thankful for my friends at school!" Caretaker: "You''re thankful for your friends at school?" Boy: "Yeah! Yeah and... and... what are you thankful for? Are you thankful for your friends?" Caretaker: *no response* Boy: "Are you thankful for me?" Caretaker: "I''m thankful for you, kid. I''m more thankful for you than all my friends in the world." Boy: *smiles*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Customer: "Are you Hispanic?" Me: "No." Customer: "Middle Eastern?" Me: "No." Customer: "Egyptian?" Me: "No." Customer: "What are you?" Me: "Chinese." (customer puts on offended face) Customer: "I don''t appreciate you treating me like I''m dumb." Me: "Excuse me? I''m being honest." Customer: "NO CHINESE PERSON WOULD EVER HAVE EYES AS BIG AS YOURS!!!" Me: *mouth wide open*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Jew in Nazi Germany and pizza ? Pizza doesn''t scream when you put it in the oven . I''m so sorry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently went to America.... ...and being there really helped me learn about American culture. So I visited a shop and as I was leaving, the Shopkeeper said "Have a nice day!" But I didn''t so I sued him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brian raises his hand and says, Hes in Heaven. A Sunday school teacher is concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, Where is Jesus today? Brian raises his hand and says, Hes in Heaven. Susan answers, Hes in my heart. Little Johnny waves his hand furiously and blurts out, Hes in our bathroom! The teacher is surprised by this answer and asks Little Johnny how he knows this. Well, Little Johnny says, every morning, my Dad gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells Jesus Christ, are you still in there?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You hear about the University book store worker who was charged for stealing $20,000 worth of books? He got caught trying to sell the two books to a freshman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it unknown on how pterodactyls urinate especially during flight? Because the p is silent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why women need legs? To avoid leaving tracks like a snail while walking.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked into a PETA adoption center and the receptionist asked me what kind of dog I wanted Apparently "Whatever''s low in cholesterol" was not the right answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did TV studios make words appear on screen before computers? Character actors!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You follow his fresh prints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember when you were a kid and when you cried your parents said, "I''ll give you a reason to cry"? I always thought they were gunna hit me, not that they were going to destroy the housing market 20 years later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, you can''t spell Valentine''s Day without... ... Anal Destiny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Happy try not to jump off a bridge day! Oh and it''s also Valentines day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boss said to me, "you''re the worst train driver ever. How many have you derailed this year?" I said, "I''m not sure; it''s hard to keep track."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I get a bird I''m naming it Trump cuz all they do is Tweet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to get a headjob for Valentines Day But my back was sore and I couldn''t reach.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother went into a coma after giving birth to twins When she woke up after 6 months and 3 days, the doctor told the mother: "While you were in a coma, we had your brother name your children. One is a boy, one is a girl." The mother, with a disappointed and angry look on her face told the doctor: "Why my brother? That guy is an idiot. So what did he name them?" The mother, expecting hideous names, prepared herself. "The girl, was named Denise." The mother thought, "Hey that wasn''t so bad. What about my boy?" The doctor said, "Denephew".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an exercise machine with a strobe light? An epileptical.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad has a heart of a lion ...and a lifetime ban from the local zoo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smaller babies may be delivered by a stork. But the bigger, heavier ones are delivered by a crane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A monkey is getting stoned in a zoo... Welcome to India', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the mommy bean say to her son when he asked for money? I dont have any, go ask your fava', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When You Break Up At 11:59 Tonight And save $300 instantly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to buy an Audi. But I can''t A4''d it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m Trying to Remember The Name of A Song It''s about a girl with amnesia talking to her Grandmother. The lyrics are "Oh, Nana, What''s My Name?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are minorities? Lesser people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Donald Trump is technically a plant? Because all of his cells have built a wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i had trouble swallowing a viagra last night my neck was stiff for 4 hours', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the king of all school supplies? The Ruler', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female !! A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mail box. She opened it, slammed it shut, and stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house and again went to the mail box and again opened it, then slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, Is something wrong? To which she replied, There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps giving me a message saying, YOUVE GOT MAIL!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman runs into a doctors office and says DOCTOR! DOCTOR! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts! A woman runs into a doctors office and says DOCTOR! DOCTOR! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts! The doctor replied, Show me. So the woman poked her ankle and screamed of pain. Then she poked her knee and yelled OW. She poked her forehead and screamed again. She was about to continue when the doctor said, Thats enough, let me think this over. He thought for about a minute and said I think I know what your problem is. You broke your finger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the producers of 007 films use government debt to fund their newest film? Because interest in the Bond is so low.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pocket empty day ! Happy pocket empty day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to see that new movie coming out with Scarlett Johannson& &but she probably isn''t available.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man gets lost in the desert. He has no compass and he has lost his sense of direction. Suddenly he sees a caravan on the horizon. He jumps, shouts and waves his arms to get their attention, and, oh joy, they notice him and move in his direction. But his happiness is short lived, as the travelers turn out to be mean and sadistic. They rough him up, and then bury him in the sand with only his head above the surface. He grimly contemplates whether he''ll die of sun stroke, dehydration or from attack of some savage beast. Suddenly, a lone traveler appears in front of him and inquires about his predicament. **You see, first I got lost, without a compass and provisions. Then I encountered these sadists, who beaten me up, bury me this way and left... Can you believe such behavior?** **Tsk, tsk...** says the traveler, as he puts his foot on top of the man''s head and pushes it under the surface **Amateurs, such amateurs...**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese Girl? You have to drop the Bomb twice before she gets the Message.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Site of the 2017 Dane county massacre. All that is left after tens of snowmen were brutally melted on this spot by a massive indifferent ball of fire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He fucked what? A small child asks his father: Boy: Dad, where did I come from? Dad: The Stork, son. Boy: what''s wrong with you dad? Your wife is so gorgeous yet you''re out fucking The Stork?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife wants to eat somewhere shes never eaten before for V-Day I told her she should try the kitchen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was offered sex with a 21 yr old today In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner. Of course I declined, because I am a person with high moral standards and strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available with scented lemon or vanilla.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 women talk "The other day I touched my husband''s balls and realized that they are cold. Never noticed before!" - says the first. Next day the second woman tells to the others: "That''s true! I touched my husband''s balls and they are also cold. It''s curious." Next day the third woman appears with her eye blacked. "What happened?" - her friends wonder. "Well, I touched my husband''s balls and then asked him why his balls are warm but all other men have them cold."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two types of people The ones who bang on the wall, And the ones who bang on the wall because I''m banging my girlfriend on the wall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the computer squeak? Someone stepped on its mouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i found a place where the recycling rate is 98%. Your moms bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel so bad for the necrophiliac''s sister She died a virgin but she sure wasn''t buried one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between you and a Calendar? A Calendar has a date on Valentine''s day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Julian Lennon messed up breakfast He tried to make eggs. He broke the yoke. Yoke! Oh! Oh no!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a place where the recycling rate is 100% This post.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I''m a dog. Happy Valentine''s Day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear the Mexicans are planning an attack on America Don''t worry, we have our Trump card.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought my friend an elephant for their room. They said thank you. I said don''t mention it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re laughing because I''m laughing. But I''m laughing braces I just farted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy proposed to his wife after walking away from a terrible car accident without a scratch. He said "Life''s too short and it can end at any time." She said "Honey, we''ve been married for 7 years. I think you have amnesia."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL you can drink lava But only once', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First woman on mars. Houston we have a problem...OK what is it? If you don''t know already I am not going to tell you. You wouldn''t understand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recipe idea: rosemary and thyme lamb, without the thyme. I give you, "The Lamb That Thyme Forgot"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the two most common names of Mexican fire-fighter? Jos and Hose B.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ice Cube was asked if there was a rock band from the 80''s of which he would have sex with all the members of... ... and he said "Fuck the Police"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad Advertisement Apparently using the words "Never opened" is no good, when trying to sell a parachute..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red. Cacti are thorny I just can''t help that You make me horny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These reports of a major snowstorm hitting the Northeast don''t concern me. It''s all just flake news.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you ask? A young Native American boy goes up to the chief of his tribe and asks "Chief, how did we get our names?" The Chief looked at the boy and said "Oh, that''s simple. All parents in our tribe named their children after something that was occurring during their birth. For example, Snowflake was born during a great blizzard. Ember was born during a raging wildfire. Why do you ask, Two Dogs Fucking?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Those ads actually ran. Yep, that''s the joke. Funny how reality has become a joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Burnt my Hawaiian pizza today Should have cooked it on aloha temperature', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the camel called the ship of the desert? Because its full of Arab semen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor''s office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it... A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor''s office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it. ''Impossible!'' says the doctor. ''Show me.'' The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream. The doctor said, ''You''re not really a redhead, are you? ''Well, no'' she said, ''I''m actually a blonde.'' ''I thought so,'' the doctor said, ''Your finger is broken.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a women say after having 3 orgasms in a row? Yeah I figured you wouldn''t know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The towns being evacuated under the Oroville Dam all voted Pro-Trump. Clearly those people love to live in constant fear of disaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Man Gets Really Drunk A man gets really drunk at a bar and asks the bartender for the bathroom. The bartender points to the bathroom and the man complains about having to take a serious shit and runs towards it. A few minutes later the man screams in agony, stops, then screams again. The bartender goes to check it out and yells to the man, "What the hell is going on?" "Everytime I press the lever, I feel like my balls are getting crushed!" the drunk yells. "You drunk bastard," the bartender replies, "you''re sitting on the mop strainer again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best thing about living in Switzerland? I don''t know... but the flag is a big plus. <<', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about Leatherface''s jewish cousin? He was also a serial killer. He liked to dig up the corpses of women and use their skin to furnish his house. After the police arrested him they discovered a whole morbid collection of objects. He had a belt made out of ears, a lampshade made from stitched together faces, they even found a labia menora.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A milestone Is one mile closer to the stone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I floss religiously. I do it on Christmas and Easter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think everyone on 4chan was a virgin, But this Guy Fawkes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What part of the house got busted for drugs? The attic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Manager : So do you think you''d be a good waiter? Me : well, you could say I bring a lot to the table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An optometrist asks a woman out on a date I have a couple of ideas: 1: Dinner 2: Movies 1 or 2? 1.. 2..? 1..... or 2?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Chinese godfather? He made him an offer he couldn''t understand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pair of jumper cables walks into a bar The bartender sighs and says; "I''ll serve you, but don''t start anything!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many South Americans does it take to change a light bulb? A Brazilian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have been trying to talk to dolphins for years. One day it just clicked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say only men and lesbians can be funny... Must be something in the pussy they''re eating', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats long and hard and full of semen? A Submarine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, how do you know if someone is drunk? Dad: Look son, you see those two people walking by?, if I had seen 4, I would''ve been drunk. Son: But dad, there''s only one person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scientist install a knocker on his/her door? He/she wanted to win the no-bell prize.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is shopping for cattle in 1886... He finally settles on a perfect Black Angus bull. He says to the owner "Here''s the money. I need to send a message to my wife to come pick up the bull. She already knows where I am but I need her to come pick him up now before it gets dark. Where can a fella send a telegram?" The owner tells him that he has a machine but it is $100 a word. "That''s outrageous! I only have $100." The owner says to him "Better make it good then." The man thinks for a few minutes and plops down the cash. "Send her this word: Comfortable." The owner of the bull looks confused and asks "How will that tell her anything?" To which the man replies "Well my wife can barely read, so she''ll just read it reeeeeeal slow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought of the first Fleshlight As it turns out it already existed but i came to it on my own', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, are you sure he was Dead? Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? A: No. Q: Did you check for blood pressure? A: No. Q: Did you check for breathing? A: No. Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? A: No. Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor? A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless? A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere. z PS. This is actual testimony from a trial...........', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are the dinosaurs afraid of Gordon Ramsey? He took a bite from one of his prey and complained that it was "FUCKING RAAAAAAWWWWW!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lot of women turn into great drivers... So if you''re a great driver, look out for women who are turning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentines Day Flowers Blonde #1: Oh how I hate when he brings me flowers. All night I''ll be on my back with my legs in the air. Blonde #2: Don''t you own a vase?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#1 Uconn women''s team going for historic 100th consecutive team in a sold out stadium against #6 South Carolina Espn2', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the outrage over the rapist getting four years? And he gets to live in the White House to boot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sure Fire Pickup Line Get in the car bitch&&I got a gun!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Michael Brown cross the road? He didn''t. He''s dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The term OP on r/Jokes Is pretty ironic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m an avid supporter of the Flat Earth Society! I always have heated debate about it with my friend residing in the other hemisphere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People in California... At first, people in California were like "Oh, we don''t have enough water!" and now they''re like "Oh, we have too much water!" ___ They can''t make up their *dam* minds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took ribeye to the top of Everest... The steaks could not be higher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man finally buys tickets to bring his family to the super bowl... He excitedly sits down in his seat and his family takes their seats to his right. The game is about to start and he notices the seat next to his left is empty. He leans over to the guy a seat over and says, ''Hey man, did you buy this seat? Who would miss the super bowl!?'' The man says to him, ''Yeah, I bought it for my wife but she passed away.'' The first guy says, ''Oh, man, I''m so sorry to hear that... didn''t you have a family member or friend that wanted the seat? I mean... It''s the super bowl.'' The man says, ''Yeah, there were a few, but they''re all at the funeral.'' *****I know its a month late, but a co-worker just told me this and his jokes are usually terrible grandpa-level jokes, so I had to post it.*****', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do the riot police show up at concerts early? To beat the crowd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Would you say 5 plus 7 is 13 or 5 plus 7 are 13?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jaws Two guys are hitchhiking down the highway. At the same time an older couple is driving on the same road. The man has diarrhea something fierce. Every few miles he has his wife pull into a service station. Finally she gets tired of this and tells him Im not stopping. If you have to go that bad, hang your ass out the window and go. So the man does this as theyre passing the hitchhikers, one of which gets the full load on him. Damned snooze chewers!!! he yells. But his partner says Yeah, but did you see the JAWS on that sumbitch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My substitute teacher had diarrhea... She couldn''t control her Pewp Hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex Statistics on a Plane. A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They exchange brief hellos and he notices she is reading a manual about sexual statistics. He asks her about it and she replies, "This is a very interesting book about sexual statistics. It identifies that American Indians have the longest average penises and Polish men have the biggest average diameter. By the way, my name is Jill. What''s yours?" He coolly replies, "Tonto Kawalski, nice to meet you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('YEE HAWWW LETS ROUND UP ALL THEM DIRTY N- Crowd : D:< Me: Nazis. . . . . Crowd: *Sigh of relief* Me: Especially Hans . . . . .Fuck Hans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police arrested two guys in the riots. One for looting batteries, the other for throwing fireworks. They charged one and let the other off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bitch ate my cookie, now the bitch is dead Apparently chocolate is bad for dogs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard of the new LGBTQ Music Awards? Yeah, theyre going to name it The Trannies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pal is a comedian. He woke me up late last night and asked if I could write a few gags for his set in a couple of days, because his mom just died and he was busy with her funeral. I agreed to help him out and asked if he had a topic in mind. He said, sorry, I''m too upset to be thinking about chocolate right now. Looks like I''m going to need help.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the hungry baby calf cross the road? To get to the udder side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got kicked out of a grocery store... for taking a leek in the vegetable aisle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a Woman with no arms or legs? Nice Tits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Measurements A man and his wife were outside their house doing yardwork. The husband looked over at his wife bent over her flower bed and said "ya know honey, I never really noticed how big your ass is. Why, I bet it''s just as wide as the range on the grill." To prove his point, the man went and grabbed the tape measure out of his toolbox. First he measured the width of the grill then his wife''s bottom. "Yep, just as thought. It really is as big as the grill." The wife got offended and stormed back into the house. Later that night, laying in bed, the husband started feeling frisky. He put his arm around hia wife and said "hey honey, what do ya say we fool around a little bit?". The wife turned to face him and said "Now why would I fire up this big ol'' grill for one little weenie?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] Did you hear about the guy whose house was overrun with cats? Apparently it was more pussy than he could handle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am going out with my valentine tonight I wish I could post it on different sub', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been suffering from an extreme form of memory loss alt-zheimers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A distraught man goes to his doctor and says "Doc, there''s a piece of lettuce sticking out of my butt!" The doctor asks him to drop his pants and examines him. The man asks: "Doc, does it look serious?" The doctor replies: "Sorry to tell you, but it''s just the tip of the iceberg."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the hostage situation at the spice factory? They used a cumin shield.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You look for the fresh prints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I first realized we were a poor family when on my birthday I asked for the new sweet iphone. And got a candy apple.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Harry Potter were about pirates: "It''s Levi-O-sARRRRRRR"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American and a Chinese were arguing about which government was better The American boasts, "clearly the American government is better. You can go to the white house with a megaphone and yell ''Trump sucks!'' and you wouldn''t even be arrested." The Chinese replied, "what of it? You can go to Tiananmen square and yell ''Trump sucks!'' and you still wouldn''t be arrested."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When m''y girlfriend said let''s not bother and do nothing this year for valentine''s day I agreed and realised way later that included sex', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s hard to believe I can smoke five cigarettes on a two mile walk to work... But it''s not that I''m a chainsmoker, it''s just the COPD makes me walk really slow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife told me "For Valentine''s Day, nothing would make me happier than a diamond necklace" So I got her nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('US Politics are Hillaryous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are time and money Women = time " money Time is money Women = money^2 Money is the root of all evil Therefore Women = Evil', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a ninjas favorite drink? WWWAAAATTTAAAAr...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pecan walks into a library... The librarian says, "so do you live in one of those little round houses? Pecan says, in a nutshell, yeah!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be a fan... But now I''m just an air conditioner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was looking for the perfect Valentine''s Day card when something caught my eye. One of the cards said "I love you and only you" I know this doesn''t sound strange but it was a pack of 20 cards', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is very anti-kids and I finally got her to agree on how many kids we''ll have We''re having two litters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump makes the best deals. Right now he''s negotiating for a better interest rate on Daylight Savings Time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 old ladies are sitting on a bus The first one says - it''s windy. Second one says - it''s not Wednesday, it''s Thursday. Third one says - yea, I''m thirsty too, we should buy something to drink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your girlfriends a keeper If she wears gloves, soccer jersey and cleats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve never done drugs before. I sidled up to the local drug dealer on the corner ... can I get an ounce of cocaine? look pal, I only sell grams! fuck it, give us an ounce of grams then!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats 12 inches long, purple and makes women scream in the middle of the night? Crib death', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need help writing a BDSM joke. I''m having trouble working out all the kinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats black and screams? Stevie Wonder answering the iron', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When did the man know it was time to dump his fat GF? When he realized it just wasn''t going to work out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you have a high sperm count? She chews before she swallows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I''m dating this girl who has a twin sister, and one night I got confused and ended up fucking her dad... :/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red Violets are blue Ive got genital warts soon you will too', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple are walking in St. Petersburg square on Christmas Eve. They start to feel some light precipitation "I think it''s raining" says the man "No it''s snowing" replies the woman. "How about we ask this communist officer here?" "He is always right" exclaims the man. "Officer Rudolph, is it raining or snowing?" "Definitely raining" officer Rudolph replies before walking off. The man turns to his wife and says. "See? Rudolph the red knows rain, dear"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend doesn''t know any Metallica songs She couldn''t name One', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have an inferiority complex but it''s not a very good one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three types of boobs A family was at the dinner table. The son asked his Father: "Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?? Surprised, the father answered:"Well, son, there are three kinds of Boobs" "In her 20''s, a women''s boobs are like Melons, round and firm." "In her 30''s to 40''s, they are like Pears, still nice but hanging a bit." "After 50, they are like Onions." Son: "Onions??" Father: "Yes, you see them and they make you cry." This made his Wife and Daughter Mad, so the Daughter asked her Mom: "How many kinds of Penises are there?" The Mother smiled and said,"Well dear, a man goes through 3 phases." "In his 20''s, his penis is like an Oak Tree, Mighty and Hard." "In his 30''s and 40''s, it is like a Birch, Flexible but Reliable." "After 50''s, it is like a Christmas Tree." Daughter: "Christmas Tree??" Mom: "Yes, the Tree is Dead and the Balls are just For Decoration!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how you can cut wood just by looking at it? You saw it. You saw it with your own two eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 nuns die and go to heaven... They''re greeted warmly by the big pearly gates. The welcoming angel is holding a big bowl of water. He asks the first nun - have you ever touched a man''s penis? The first nun trembles and says yes, she touched a penis but only with her fingers. Dip your fingers into the holy water and you will be pure, instructs the angel. The nun dips her fingers in the water and is allowed through the big pearly gates. The angel turns to the second nun and asks - did you touch a man''s penis? Before she could answer, the third nun blurts out - eww, I''m not drinking that water after it goes up her ass!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nurse walks up to the Doctor The nurse walks up to the doctor and asks... Doc, what are you doing? Doc says... I''m writing a prescription. Nurse says, but you''re holding your thermometer. Doc looks at her and says God Damn it some asshole has my pen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I met a Soldier that survived Mustard Gas and Pepper spray He was a seasoned Veteran', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One snow day a mother is making brownies for her kids She accidentally knocks her youngest son''s jar of bb''s into the brownie mix. She says "oh it''ll be alright" Several hours after the brownies were done her youngest son comes to her with tears in his eyes and says "Mommy, when I was using the restroom I was peeing and something hard came out." She said "Oh it was just a BB, you''ll be alright." Half an hour later she''s cleaning and she hears sobbing coming from the bathroom, she sees her daughter and asks what''s wrong. Her daughter says "I think I have kidney stones." The mom replies "oh it was just a BB, you''ll be alright." Later that night she hears her oldest son laughing and says "Let me guess, you were peeing and a BB came out?" He says "No I was beating off and shot the dog!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is served whiskey on a flight A man is served whiskey on a flight. The flight attendant asks the priest seated next to him, whether he would like a drink too? Priest: I would rather be raped by a dozen prostitutes than let liquor touch my lips The man returns the drink saying: Me too, I didn''t know we had a choice...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you castrate Vladimir Putin? Kick Donald Trump in the chin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Ancient Egyptians build Great Pyramids? Because their Great Igloos melted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock KNOCKIN ON HEAVENS DOOOWUUUWAAAAAAA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of investment do chemists prefer? They have an affinity for bonds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. D J Trump: Fake News!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lesbian cavewoman? A Troglodyke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one boat say to the other? Are you up for a little row-mance?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Colleagues A female student walks down the street of a college town. She had a stressful day and is dying to smoke a cigarette, but her lighter simply won''t work. Then she notices a few young women hanging out on street corner. She''s shy, but eventually works up a courage to approach them. Out of nervousness she blurts out: **Dear colleagues, I was wondering if you had a light?** One of the women produces a lighter, and the student walks away, puffing away happily. The women watch her go, and finally one remarks: **Puts out once, and now we''re "colleagues"...** Let the downvotes begin... ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is suing Male enhancement giant Viagra.. He says it''s a rigged erection', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael Flynn bumps into Donald Trump Pardon me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do Mexicans feel about Trumps wall? They''re already over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('an American and a Australian are in the trenches the American asks: did you come here to die the Australian says back: no i came here yesterday', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? "No". I thought not. It''s not a story the jedi would tell you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Communism. Master race.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God, I wish that Id used a condom now. My wife walked in to the room when I was in the middle of a furious argument with our son. When he ran out of the room crying, I said to my wife, God, I wish that Id used a condom now. My wife was aghast and said, What! You mean you wish that our son had never been born? I said, No, Ive got his girlfriend pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a dozen cup-cakes from a bakery. I got them home, opened the box and thought... that''s odd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish man walks into a builders merchant He gets a tin of paint and puts it on the counter, then pays the cashier; the cashier asked if he''d like a bag for it. He says: "don''t you worry, it''s fine in the tin"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Swede, an Icelander and a Norwegian end up shipwrecked on a deserted island. One day, as they are scouring the beaches for firewood, they come across an old oil lamp, washed ashore. The Swede picks it up and wipes it gently with his shirt sleeve, clearing the sand and the dirt. Out pops a spirit. The spirit says: "I have been trapped inside that lamp for a millennium due to a magic spell. Finally I have been set free. As a token of my gratitude, I will grant you one wish each." The Swede states that he is fed up with that little island and he would like to go back to Trelleborg. Poof, the Swede is gone. Next up is the Norwegian. He says: "I agree. I want to go home too, back to Narvik." Poof, the Norwegian vanishes. Now only the Icelander is left. After some pondering, he makes his wish. "It''s too lonely out here all by myself. I want my friends back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to hate the ballet Now I just watch like nobody''s dancing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the kidnapping in the park the other day? He woke up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the death The Monkees'' Davy Jones... I''d like to offer mickydolenzes to his family.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Doc Brown say when he tastes good booze? "Great scotch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you find a blind guy at a nudist colony? It''s not hard...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump & Trudeau Donald Trump and Justin Trudeau were we discussing politics when Donald leans in close and says: Donald: You know Justin, if the US were a Dictatorship I would be a Dictator. Justin: Yea, I suppose so Donald. Donald: And you know if the US were a Monarchy I would be a Monarch. Justin: That''s also true Don, but I hate to break it to you, the US is a Country.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In honor of Valentine''s Day - what''s better than a rose on a piano? Tulips on an organ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Twin sisters just turned 100 years old Twin sisters just turned one hundred years old in St. Luke''s Nursing Home and the editor of the Cambridge rag, "The Cambridge Distorter," told a photographer to get over there and take the pictures of these 100 year old twin bitteys. One of the twins was hard of hearing and the other could hear quite well. The photographer asked them to sit on the sofa and the deaf one said to her twin, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" He said, "WE GOTTA SIT OVER THERE ON THE SOFA!" said the other. "Now get a little closer together," said the cameraman. Again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" "HE SAYS SQUEEZE TOGETHER A LITTLE." So they wiggled up close to each other. "Just hold on for a bit longer, I''ve got to focus a little," said the photographer. Yet again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" "HE SAYS HE''S GONNA FOCUS!" With a big grin the deaf twin shouted out, "OH MY GOD - BOTH OF US?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever gone out on a first date and she tells you she never sleeps with anyone until at least the third date? That''s just her way of getting two more dates out of you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a musician, I''ve learned the best way to win a Grammy... ...is to not release your music in the same year as Adele.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a diploma My parents keep telling me to get one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Adele''s groupies? The infadeles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a person in love with a pie Piesexual!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you spell the word "man" backwards Flashbacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the white girl count by odds to ten? Because she can''t even', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a place where the recycling rate is 52% Switzerland', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Oroville dam catastrophe is Trump''s fault No manmade structure was designed to hold back that many liberal tears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So people don''t confuse them with feminists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you encourage a bear to eat cheese? C''mon bear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''d the cowboy say when he walked into the German car dealership? Audi...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('American, German and Bosnian guys compete... American, German and Bosnian guys compete who will fart out a wine bottle cap the furthest. American goes first, eats 1 bowl of beans and farts out the cap 5 feet. German goes next, eats a cauldron full of beans and farts the cap 17 meters. Bosnian goes last, eats 1 bean and farts. They couldn''t find the cap and they give up. The next day on the news: "An UFO size of a wine bottle cap hits and kills a Japanese civilian!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the house I grew up in and wanted to look around I knocked on the door and asked if I could, the people just slammed the door in my face. My parents can be so rude sometimes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the orchestra teacher angry? Her students were pizzing her off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An advertiser for coke is dispatched to Israel When he comes back, his friend asks him how it went. He replies that it did not go well. "What happened?" his friend asked. "Well, since I didn''t know hebrew, I decided to convey the ad through a comic. The first panel showed a guy in a desert, dying of thirst. The secone panel showed him drinking coke. And the third panel showed him completely rejuvenated." "That sounds great! Why didn''t it work?" "Nobody told me they read right to left!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just finished the first semester in college and here is a list of things I failed at: 1.) The 1st semester', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the bakery that spent too much on cakes? They ended up with an antoinette loss!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother said that I''m indecisive I couldn''t understand where that came from, so I asked people. "It''s because you like both dogs and cats" said my boyfriend. "No, no, no. It''s because she likes both tea and coffee" said my girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please pray for my daughter''s soul She was born a red head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it. I''m sorry. My mom taught me that joke and told me that every birthday and it''s my birthday today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Trump''s least favorite periodic element? Just Tin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An interviewer asks a shepard Interviewer: How much milk do these cows give? Farmer: Which one? The Black ones or the brown ones? Interviewer: Brown ones. Farmer: A couple of litres per day. Interviewer: And the black ones? Farmer: A couple of litres per day. Interviewer(naturally a bit flummoxed): I see. What do you give them to eat? Farmer: Which ones? Black or brown? Interviewer: Black. Farmer: It eats grass. Interviewer: And the other ones? Farmer: Grass. Interviewer(now annoyed) : Why do you keep asking which one when the answers are the same?! Farmer: Because the black ones are mine. Interviewer: Oh, and the brown ones? Farmer: they are also mine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jon: walks out from the bathroom- "Hey man sorry I took so long, I was just fixing my hair" Me: "Then what happened? Did you decide not to give a fuck??"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The last man sat in a room. There was a knock at the door... It was a lawyer. Edit: The last human on Earth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would like to propose a toast! For honor... If you can get honor. Stay honor. But if you can''t come in her, Come honor. For honor!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bunny comes to Bear''s bakery... He asks for a cabbage pie. Bear tells him they don''t have that kind of pie. It repeats for a few days. Bear takes pity on Bunny and tells his wife, who does the baking: >Please, bake a cabbage pie for Bunny. He comes in every day asking for it. So the next day, Bunny is there again. >Do you have a cabbage pie? &nbsp; >Yeah, we do! &nbsp; >It''s just gross, right?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How deep do the Sandusky genes run? All the way to boys size 12.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma''s so stupid She tried to use politics to determine if a vector field was conservative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife left me after being seduced by an Asian guy. He''s a real Dong Wong. I''ll just show myself out...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a playing card and Africa? One is the ace of spades, the other is the space of aids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do all women at the womens marches have in common? They don''t want the D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the seamonster''s favourite meal? Fish & Ships', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the news about corduroy pillows? They''re making headlines', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m really torn on abortions... On the one hand, I support it because it''s killing babies. On the other hand, it gives women a choice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The environment is so bad. Dihydrogen monoxide now covers 70% of Earth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get stuck bubble gum out of your hair? Cancer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ran over a Deer.... ....dear dear old man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is pasta month? I need to mark my colander.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate when people misuse "it''s" and "its" Tits very annoying', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL: 80% of people will believe a fact if it has a percentage in it Or so I''ve been told', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by being dyslexic and kidnapping 42 people Sorry, wrong bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Putting it in. A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, ''I almost had an affair with another woman.'' The priest said, ''What do you mean, almost?'' The Irishman said, ''Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.'' The priest said, ''Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You''re not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary''s and put $50 in the poor box.'' The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, ''I saw that. You didn''t put any money in the poor box!'' The Irishman replied, ''Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that''s the same as putting it in!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s red and bad for your teeth? A Brick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If any of you are sad about being alone on valentines day, just remember... that nobody loves you on any other day of the year, and valentine''s day shouldn''t be any different.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is everyone scared of my hard drive? Because it has a terabyte.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the most destructive dinosaur of the prehistoric era? *Tyrannosaurus Wrecks*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What advice did the family therapist give to Jerry Sandusky Jr.? Always remain in-touch with the community.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tomorrow, I''m going to go to my girlfriend, get on one knee, present flowers and a ring, and say... "My love for you is like these flowers and this ring. It''s gonna wither and die by the end of the month and is also insanely overvalued."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did you know that the exterminator was attracted to termites? Because he pitched a tent whenever he saw one...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is your refrigerator running? If it''s not, you better check the connections on the back, or call a maintenance guy. Hopefully you didn''t lose power. I''d make sure to get it figured out soon so your food doesn''t go bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why isn''t Hitler playing in Esports? I wonder why Hitler haven''t been invited to a Epsorts event yet. His KD ratio was 6,000,000 to 1.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 14999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I might''ve just wrote the greatest joke of all time. But I think I''m gonna wait until someone else posts it here first though...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Fiora always banned? Great Reposte no counterplay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ravens and Crows A good friend told me a story once. When she was a kid her family would often go to zoos and museums while on vacation. They were in the aviary on one of those visits looking at birds. My friend saw a crow asked the zookeeper a question. "What''s the difference between a raven and a crow?" The zookeeper looked at her, smiled and started to answer. "Have you ever heard of a pinion feather?" he said. "Pinions are the the feathers at the tip of a bird''s wing that allows it to fly. They are also the ones that people will trim to prevent birds from flying away. Crows have 5 pinion feathers while ravens have 6. So, if you think about it, it''s really just a matter of a pinion." To this day, my friend and her family don''t know the real answer to "What''s the difference between a crow and a raven?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A government man is walking his way to work... As he carries his heavy suitcase, a Russian woman comes up to him with a whiskey bottle in her hand and says, "I''ll jerk your dick while you chug this, deal?" The man, not even thinking about the situation, agrees instantly and they rush off to the restroom, find a stall, and start doing it. While being jerked, he caps of the whisky bottle and starts chugging. A moment after, he starts feeling funny and dozes off to sleep. He wakes up, unknown of the time that has passed, and looks down only to realize his pants and underwear is gone, including his suitcase. Horrified, he runs out of the restroom, his thong going everywhere and ''bout, and yells, "Help! Help! I''ve been jacked!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can February march??? No, but April may.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best way to get bubblegum out of your hair? Cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call her when St. Nick''s wife dumps him to join a biker gang? A rebel without a Claus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re a very beautiful girl ... and you have a nice personality and a beautiful smile Girl: you just wanna get into my pants Boy: you''re intelligent as well.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are women attracted to intelligent men? Opposites attract', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m obsessed with pushing my penis between my legs and pretending I''m a woman. It all started when my dad used to tuck me in at night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you always use your middle finger on a woman? Because a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didnt like my beard at first Then it really grew on me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you Samarium, Arsenic, and Hydrogen? because I want to SmAsH', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of planes do rappers fly? Spitfire', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: (To Reddit) will you be my valentine ??? Reddit : " I am married and i have many childs (SubReddits) "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jeff won 20 million dollars But he did not know about it and his family did. They were afraid that if they told him he would have a heart attack, so they chose his favourite brother Ted to tell him easily. "If you won 20 million dollars, what would you do with them?" Said Ted. "I would give you half of them" said Jeff. Today is Ted`s funeral.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Math class Teacher asks Johnny: "Imagine you have $200. And you give $50 to Jane, $50 to Suzi, $50 to Melissa. What would you have?" "An orgy?" Edited: names spelling, grammar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do bread cells divide? They sbread apart through mitoastis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyones keeps teasing me about being so damn lazy I just can''t do this anymore. I think I''m just going to kill myself. But the gun is like... way over there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('!false It''s funny cause it''s true.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? Zero.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex I know, I don''t get it either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m selling an authentic French rifle.. It was never fired and only dropped once.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: A movie theatre has just been robbed of over two thousand dollars The theives took a large soda and two bags of popcorn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to properly propose to a stoner Marriage-you-wanna?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bartender asks the first one "What can I get you?" Two race conditions walk into a bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two gay men in are having sex..... Two gay men are having sex in bedroom. After a while one of them decides that he needs a break and goes to bathroom. The second one thinks he''s away for too long so he goes to check him. When he finds him in bathroom, whole room is covered with semen. He asks with anger: ''Why didn''t you wait for me?!'' but second one sort of surprised answers: ''Oh you mean that? I just farted....''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pea wonder before an 8 hour road trip? To pee or not to pee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the teacher cross eyed? Because he couldn''t control his pupils.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old McDonald had a farm... 2.71828 (-1) 2.71828 (-1) (5-5)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Manager gets caught stealing from his pizza job. Upper management says, they caught him stealing "dough".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of bee produces milk instead of honey? A boo bee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the muslim guy rig a competition? So he could win Allah the prizes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a doctor named Otto? An ottometrist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump''s greeting to all Mexicans on 14th February. Happy Wallentine''s Day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were the Vandals so fat? Gravity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck... Then the humans will suspect nothing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Snickers and a dick? Try Snickers sometimes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My father died from an overdose of Viagra recently. It''s been a hard time for us.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexican word of the day: Chicken My wife tried to come to America, but thanks to trump chicken not get in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you like duck sausage? Then duck on over here and get some.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the United States'' biggest, most well-known export? Troops', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought a vasectomy wouldn''t get my wife pregnant.. Turns out, all it does is just change the color of the baby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned sign language It''s very handy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does anyone else get as excited about Valentine''s Day coming up as they do about Christmas? Or is it just because I''m Jewish?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what''s really odd? Numbers that aren''t divisible by two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandpa said to me: "I don''t think these "Free (someone)" things are working..." "I mean I''ve seen millions of these "Free Wifi" -signs through the years, but as far as I know, the poor bastard hasn''t been freed yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the cleavage of a woman with fake breasts? Silicone Valley', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked an old man, "Even after 95 years, you still call your wife ''Darling'', ''Honey'', ''Love''. What''s the secret?" I asked an old man, "Even after 95 years, you still call your wife ''Darling'', ''Honey'', ''Love''. What''s the secret?" . OLD MAN: "I forgot her name 10 years ago and I''m scared to ask her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Hellen Keller drive? One hand on the steering wheel, the other on the road', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This administration is doing everything they can as quickly as possible So much so, even their scandals are Russian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the gay horse eat for brunch? Hay HAY Hay', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s one good thing about being a porn star. You''re always going to be satisfied with the job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some women love playing hard to get. Closing their blinds, locking their doors, calling the police...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate it when it heils outside... I always blame the Nazis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Girls Sleepover Amy: Truth or dare? Lingling: Truth. Amy: Where''s Sarah''s dog? Lingling: Dare. **lmao this is old asf and i am in no way racist, this just made me laugh**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My aunt Marge has been in hospital for a while. I can''t believe she''s not better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr and Mrs.. Mr and Mrs Sterile have no children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are women so clueless? They never bothered with the "Y".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man stands, chain smoking at a bus stop... A man stands, chain smoking at a bus stop. The woman standing next to him says "Hey, don''t you know that those things can kill you? I mean, didn''t you see the giant warning on the box?!" "That''s OK..." says the guy, puffing casually, "I''m a programmer" "So? What''s that got to do with anything?" "Errors are serious, warnings are nothing...".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it looks like a duck, and sounds like a duck... It probably identifies as a napkin and how dare you assume it''s species.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Californians hate walls so much... They cried until the Oroville dam collapsed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man drove his car into a tree. He found out how a Mercedes bends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Favorite sandwich So, I was talking to my friend the other day, and we ended up talking about our local deli. &nbsp; I asked him what his favorite sandwich was, and he told me it was the pastrami salami sandwich. &nbsp; Then I said "I don''t remember that one. What''s on it exactly?" &nbsp; He said "It''s the one with the synthetic pork and lard sausage." &nbsp; I said "No, you''re thinking of the phony bologna sandwich."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a place where the recycling rate is 98% /r/Jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to make a joke about chemistry tests But NaH', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pass the dam fish! A boy is selling fish on a corner. To get his customers'' attention, he is yelling, "Dam fish for sale! Get your dam fish here!" A pastor hears this and asks, "Why are you calling them "dam fish." The boy responds, "Because I caught these fish at the local dam." The pastor buys a couple fish, takes them home to his wife, and asks her to cook the dam fish. The wife responds surprised, "I didn''t know it was acceptable for a preacher to speak that way." He explains to her why they are dam fish. Later at the dinner table, he asks his son to pass the dam fish. He responds, "That''s the spirit, Dad! Now pass the fucking potatoes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did scorpion say to your ugly mum Stay oveerrr there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finding the perfect shower temperature on the first try is like my girlfriend Non existent, but I hope every day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dick has a sad life if you think about it His hair is a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbour is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy and to top it all off, his owner beats him regularly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the invisible man quit his new job? He just couldn''t see himself doing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when a Mexican provides hands-on internet services? Emanuel Labor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PSA: You should all donate money to testicular cancer research. It''s a no-ball cause. (But seriously you should)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a very busy businessman, but my wife still demanded that I take her out for valentine''s day... Vinnie, my hitman, said he''d do it for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shopping Cart racing Every time I see someone racing their shopping cart down the parking lot I secretly hope they run into a car. Wham!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jehovah''s witnesses are always banging on my door everyday Joke''s on them, I''m never letting them out of my basement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The choice for president came down to two candidates: the moody bitch or Hillary Clinton.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the troublesome teaspoon? It went into the kitchen and caused a stir.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was standing in line for hours showing my appreciation to everyone I met. It was a thanqueue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife what she wanted for Valentine''s Day, and she said "Something long and powerful that vibrates." I hope she likes her new weed eater!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s the father of corny jokes? Popcorn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Jewish men usually circumcised? Because Jewish women won''t take anything that''s less than 10% off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Trump''s favorite YouTuber? CrazyRussianHacker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mum calls me Scott, but my friends call me when they want something', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend is trying to convince me to replace all my skin with a plush brown material But I won''t be suede', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was doing CPR the other day And wow, that sure is a work out, it really....gets the blood moving', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never swallow scrabble tiles... That shit could spell disaster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of tea is hard to swallow sometimes? Re-ali', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What marker is only sold in shady areas? Mr. Sketch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman gets a new number She sends a text message to her husband. W - "Hi honey, this is my new number. Can''t wait to see you tonight" M - "Hey babe. I can''t tonight. I''m having dinner with my wife"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do pirates have babies? They Aaarrrrrrrrrrtificially Inseminate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was getting out of the shower As her husband was getting in; and she heard the door bell and quickly wrapped herself in a towel and went downstairs. She opened the door and it was their next door neighbor, Mike. He said, I''ll give you eight hundred dollars if you drop that towel right now. She thought, well that''s a lot of money, so she dropped the towel. He gave her the money and left. She went upstairs and told her husband that the neighbor Mike had come by. He asked if he gave her the eight hundred dollars he owed him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('it all The title says it all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During science class at school, I lowered the pressure and temperature in my lab flask, and introduced some tiny ice crystals to it. But my tutor stopped me and sent me home for trolling. How was I supposed to know it was bad to trigger snowflakes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever noticed that Ireland is just one sea away from.... Iceland', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said she wanted to feel special this Valentines Day. So I bought her a helmet and some crayons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It must be hard working as a prostitute. After all, work just comes and goes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For the valentines spirit Roses are red violets are blue I am pregnant but it is not from you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('roses are red, violets are blue in soviet russia, poems write you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('my friends carter and jack that''s it. that''s the joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dads Brilliant Business Plan Scene: A conversation with my friends father, who knows I do Web design. Father: I have a business idea. How hard is it to make a Facebook? Me: Oh, very easy. Friend: He doesnt mean to make a Facebook profile. He means to remake all of Facebook. Me: Oh. Very hard. Father: Oh, OK.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Anne Frank tie her shoes? In little Nazis!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently came into some money. You should have seen the look on the cashier''s face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister can''t stop having sex. I think she''s addickted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what I hate? People who answer their own questions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pathology lab was robbed last night. The stool samples were gone! The supervisor couldn''t believe it. He lost his shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you call a vegetarian spy? A Spynach', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentine day gift Husband : What do you want for Valentine Day ?? Wife : Give me One Ring, that''s enough .. Husband : From Landline or Mobile ??', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I went to pay for my items in a spiritualist shop I noticed a sign saying ''Queue on the other side''. So I killed myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What My Girlfriend Thought, First four Dates: 1. Nice shirt. 2. Wow. A second nice shirt. 3. OK, first shirt again. 4. He has two shirts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A: A quarter pounder with cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the pencil s bad influence on the paper ? His darkness rubbed off on him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Airhorn sound* *Second airhorn sound* Me: "Well this clearly isn''t deodorant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Celebrating birthdays is good Numerous studies say that people who celebrate more birthdays live for longer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bag of salt was crossing the road. Suddenly he tripped and fell, spilling his contents all over the road. Sensing no movement at all for quite some time, the road asked: "Do you need some help so you can get up, cross the road and finish this joke? What''s wrong?" The salt replies: "Freezing point depression."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best thing about John Cena jokes? You can''t see them coming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich guy dies and goes to the gates of heaven. He offers Peter gold, thinking he can buy his way in. Peter looks at it and says, "You brought me pavement?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I left my wife At the grocery store. I told her I would wait in the car. What I didn''t tell her was that I would move the car to the other end of the parking lot, and watch for her to come out. Something tells me that after 15 minutes of searching, she''ll feel the same way I did in the dairy section. Which butter is healthiest, she wondered, after reading the first 3 labels. She''s probably still reading them. I can''t wait to learn which one she''d chosen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Posting a joke on a Reddit is like going in a bar. Sometimes you get lucky, but most of the time you just lose your self esteem', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the frog cross the road? Some geeky kid in the 80''s forced it to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Many Times is This Shit Going to Get Reposted? Doesn''t matter you Reddit anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer was letting his 26 cows graze on a field near his farm with his dog when suddenly he sees a rain cloud approach. He doesn''t want his animals getting soaked or they might end up cold. He quickly scavenges for a bunch of branches and combines it with a tarp that he brought just for this occasion to build a make shift shelter. He whistles for his dog to herd them under the haphazard roof. He does a quick count and is shocked to find he suddenly has 30 cows. The next day he brings his wife along with his cows. Without even waiting for rain he builds a canvas roof and herds all his cows inside and again his 26 cows turn into 30. But his wife is less than impressed. "Don''t you think that''s amazing?!" he asks her. The Wife replies, "It''s just as expected, you rounded them up to the nearest tent."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Trump avoid discovery when all of the main means of communication were being traced? He used the alternative fax.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and eats pussy? Cervical cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d like to think that my girlfriend and I have a relationship that is above being forced to buy simple gifts as part of a made up holiday that exploits working class people through the commercialism of enormous corporations But I''d also like to get laid tomorrow night, so Walgreens after work it is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] What does the South side of Chicago hate about their police chief? His subject matter is poorly executed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cage the Elephant only won the Grammy out of pity... ...because they''re originally from Bowling Green, and everyone was sorry for the loved ones they lost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was jogging around the track at the gym and this really hot Latina chick passed me. I gave her a friendly wave and said "hola." However, she kept running and didn''t say anything to me. I shrugged and kept going, thinking that maybe she didn''t hear me. About 10 minutes later, she caught up to me again, and I once more waved and said "hola." Still, she kept her eyes straight ahead as she passed me and didn''t respond. At this point, I was a little offended and felt determined to at least get a response of some kind from her. Finally, about 10 minutes later she caught up to me again, and as she passed I said "hola" somewhat louder than before. She finally slowed down and turned back to me and said "A few times I''ve been around this track, so it''s not just gonna happen like that, ''cause I ain''t no hola back girl!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just dropped my phone in a load of mayo. What the hellman!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the smallest organ in a goat? An ISIS members'' dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Batman''s favorite drink? Nothing...just ice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 hookers How do you get 4 hookers on to one stool? Turn It upside down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at a party and I lost my watch I started looking throughout the house, and when I turn a corner there''s a guy standing on my timepiece, borderline groping and harassing a girl. So I go up and punch the guy, that''s not gonna happen. Not on my watch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('roses are red, violets are blue, pornhub is down; your facebook will do', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, Am I adopted ? I don''t know, ask your other dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Communism jokes aren''t funny Unless everyone gets them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('American Billionaire Grant Cardone is seeing a top psychiatrist. Apparently, he has a huge apartment complex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The worlds 4 most famous partially sighted musicians have got together. They''re starting a focus group.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of bees make milk? *boo*-bees', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I spend my valentines days like aging racist. Sad and alone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Humanity must have an Oedipus complex Because they all want to fuck mother nature.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking: Donald Trumps hair has been reported as missing Police are combing the area', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they have bar codes on the returning Swedish fleet? So they can Scandinavian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once got into so much debt I couldn''t even afford my electricity bills, they were the darkest times of my life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two eco terrorists humping a tree? A treesome!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back then, if I wanted to see her panties, I had to lift her skirt. Today, if I want to see her panties, I have to spread her butt cheeks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ELI5 why can you get dishonorably discharged from the Navy for boarding the wrong vessel just once? Whooops wrong sub!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had to break up with my cross-eyed girlfriend... Apparently, she was seeing someone else on the side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hope I leave this world the same way I came into it... Wrecking an 18-year-old''s pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It all The title says it all', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have this theory about the origin of orgies. It all started with a big bang!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the different between batman and a black man? Batman can go out without robin ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks the Priest... "Why do you use a Samsung phone?" "To remind me that the apple was the first sin." "So you are an atheist?" "Of course not! Why do you think that?" "Because I have notes on why Samsung''s phones always end with a big bang!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally watched Girl on the Train. I guess you could say there''s a real twist at the end...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The alien vessel landed quietly on St Peter''s square in Rome... A hatch opened and two little grey men with dazzling smiles appeared. They were promptly granted an audience with the Pope. After a brief discussion about the weather, the Pope said, "I know this question may sound odd to you, but I was wondering if you and your kind knew about Jesus Christ?" "Jesus Christ?!" exclaimed the slightly taller of two aliens. "Of course we do! He visits our planet every two years or so. Awesome fellow!" A hush descended on the audience chamber, and everyone watched the Pope, whose face had turned a rather odd purple. "Every two years?" he shouted. "We''re still waiting for his second coming!" "Maybe he didn''t like your chocolate?" suggested the alien. "Chocolate?" replied the Pope. "What in heaven''s name does chocolate have to do with it?" "Well," said the alien. "When he came to our planet, we gave him chocolate. Why, what did you do?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Lady visited a bar for the first time.. She was nervous but sat on one tall stool in front of the bartender.. the guy sitting on her left said: "Jack Daniels, Single" the Guy on her right side ordered: "Johnny Walker, Single" now the bartender looked at the lady & said, "And You?" Lady replied: "Yolanda, Married"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a venereal disease from a girl in a wheelchair Now I''m handiclapped', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a gang member''s favorite skateboarding trick? A cripflip', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This girl kept saying how Brits drank too much tea and how she hated it. But she didn''t seem too happy when I took her tea shirt off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate people who always sit on the fence with two opinions. Having said that, I love them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s wrong with that 5 year old Ethiopian? He''s having a mid-life crisis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What currency do they use in outer space? Starbucks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Amazon Drones I read an article about drones recently. A software development firm was testing drones in the Amazon basin and developing mapping software when they began receiving strange anomalies in the data. The drones were covering more area than they had modeled in the software. They couldn''t figure out why the drones were exceeding the units per second figures of their graphs. That''s when I realized: Amazon drones are always faster than U(nit)P(er)S(econd) estimations.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just removed my sister''s bra. She said, "Stop wearing my bra''s."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentine''s Day is around the corner and I don''t know what to get my partner... I mean, what do you get for your left hand?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you milk sheep? With iPhone accessories.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the Scarecrow, win the award? He was out standing in his field', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy who gets lots of blowjobs? Successful', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bumped into Liam Gallagher in Manchester the other day and he told me this joke. "What do Blur and Iranians have in common?" They''re both shiite', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t William Shakespeare go to the pub? Because he was bard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The most attractive thing about your mom... Is her gravitational pull', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An atheist, a vegan and a CrossFitter walk into a bar I only know because they told everyone within two minutes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So the bartender says "I''m sorry, but we don''t serve time travelers here" A time traveler walk into a bar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red Raindrops are dank My father died. How?, my repulsive ass stank (not funny, but a valentines day related joke)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father is on his deathbed. His 4 children are there, 3 tall with red hair, 1 short with black hair, as well as his wife. "Before I die, tell me,is that my child?"He asks his wife, pointing to the shortest. "I swear on everything that''s your kid."The wife replies. Relieved the father then passes away. Shortly after he passes, his wife mutters "Thank god he didn''t ask about the other three." Edit: makes more sense, also some spacing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an octopus with an electric eel? A shocktopus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boss wanted fire one of his coworkers Boss: "I''m sorry but you are fired" Coworker: "why? I didn''t do anything?" Boss: "Bingo"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother takes her three sons to enroll in school. The teacher asks. A mother takes her three sons to enroll in school. The teacher asks. Teacher: What are your sons names? Lady: This boys name is Leroy, this other boys name is Leroy, and Leroy here is my third sons name. Teacher: Isnt it confusing having all three boys named the same? Lady: Oh no, you see when its time for lunch I just holler out the door, Leroy! its time for lunch, and they all come a runnin. When its time for dinner I just holler out the door, Leroy! its time for dinner and they all come a runnin. Teacher: Ok, so what do you do when you want a specific boy? Lady: Oh, well then I just holler out their last name.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Has anyone found a date for Valentine''s? I did! It''s on 14th Feb! Laugh please I''m pathetic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the Ancient Greeks seperate the men from the boys? With a crowbar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Me. Me who? I didn''t know you had a cat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman cried and slammed the door of the restroom . . . seeing how she grimaced, the janitor asked if there was someone in the toilet, to which the woman responded "Almost!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can never understand organic chemistry. It has alkynes of problems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wasn''t originally going to get a brain transplant. But then I changed my mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do trees do when they get mad at each other? Throw shade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I''ve never had a garbanzo bean on my face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the kid-napping at the school? Well, he''s fine. He''s awake now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been told I''m a "real catch" by the ladies. *Lady doctors. Apparently I have all sorts of viruses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: "Dad, Am I adopted"? Dad: "Not yet. We still haven''t found anyone who wants you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks on a street and sees an open manhole He cries into it: "Fuck you bitch!" Then echo replies: "Bitch you fuck!" A bit puzzled, he cries again: "Bitch you fuck!" And a second later, he hears: "Fuck you bitch!" Even more puzzled, he cries inside: "Fuck you bitch bitch you fuck!" The manhole replies: "Fuck off dude, I''m trying to work here"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a seagull I saw a huge seagull this morning. It was big enough to be a D gull... But not quite big enough to be an eagle. One thing''s for sure, it definitely wasn''t a beagle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a river so rich? Because it has two banks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a fire breaks out at a swingers convention It causes premature evacuation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a handkerchief dance? Put a little boogie in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you deal with a bunch of clowns? You go for the juggler.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do we want? A cure for tourrettes. When do we want it? FUCKING SHIT CUNT!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump loves chewing 5 Gum He wants to Stimulate his Pences.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow running through tall grass? Udderly Tickled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What I find most sexy in a girl is her personality Girl: Oh good, cus I have several of those! Guy: Uh... what? Girl: _Shh!_ don''t _listen_ to _her!_', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do black men do after sex? 15 years to life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What if Cee-Lo Green wrote a poem? I see you drivin'' ''Round town with the girl I love And I''m like haiku', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For my wife''s birthday, I got a guy to follow her all day making bee noises. She really wanted a hummer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my doctor suspects sexual transmission Doctor: it could be a sexually tran... Me: not unless I got it from a toilet seat Me:(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Will glass coffins be a success? Remains to be seen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking news: An entire shipment of Viagra has been stolen The polices are looking for a gang of hardened criminals', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This 70 year old guy walks in to his favorite bar with his new 25 year old bride Everyone is totally amazed at the sight, then one of his buddy''s asked how did you get this young thing to marry you. .. ........Told her I was 80...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A German chemistry student holds up a small vial of HCn. The professor asks him if he''s done with the lab. He says, "Yes, professor, this is my final solution."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the longest and hardest thing for a black man? 3rd grade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are ghosts impotent? Because they have a hollow-weenie sorry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My roomate scared me as I was leaving the bathroom I guess I got scared shitless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve decided that I like the alt-right It feels good to jerk my dick with my left hand from time to time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The real reason it floods after the levee breaks? Nobody gives a dam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adele requested and got a reset/restart on her song at the Grammy because she messed up The Atlanta Falcons would also like to replay the 4th Quarter of the Superbowl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Got my rabbits balls chopped off Friend: So how''d they taste?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The reason why Bill Gates is paying for Donald Trump''s wall He knows no Juan in Mexico can foot the bill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow with no legs... Ground beef.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Math] Hey girl, want to come over and integrate? Unfortunately, After every time we +e^x I am left with an e^x', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love sleeping so much! \* Opens my eyes \* Doctor: You were in Coma for four years. Me: Just five more minutes please. \* Goes back to sleep \*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a Freudian slip with my wife tonight. I meant to ask her to "feed the dogs." Instead I said, "You ruined my life, you soul sucking, evil beast."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... And a chair, and a table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: Samsung has agreed to work with Bill Gates on Trump''s wall On the condition to recycle Samsung Galaxy Note 7', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex with three people is called a threesome. Sex with two people is called a twosome. That is why they call me handsome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A naked lady walks into a bar with a parrot on her shoulder. The bartender says That''s a nice pig you got there. The woman says it''s not a pig it''s a parrot. The bartender says I was talking to the parrot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you circumcise a whale? 4 skin divers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My das was telling me why he quit drinking. He was talking to his grandfather and they were both huge hunters. A conversation arose about ticks, and how they would always affect the game they caught, how they were "fuckin'' blood sacs of the devil". A light turns on and my dad turns around abruptly and sees his mother standing there in a white gown. "Who and what the fuck are you talking about"? "Geandfather! Talkin'' about ticks! Tick talk!" My grandmother shakes her head and with a blank expression says "Carl that a fucking clock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidently lost some chromosomes today Now I''m feeling rather down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love is an open~ Relationship', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the man who went to get circumcised say? Just a little off the top', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought shoes from a drug dealer... I don''t know what he laced them with but I''ve been tripping all day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I hear one more pun about whale food... I''m gonna krill myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s the first Jewish guy to ever win a Heisman trophy? "Fred Goldman cause he took mine!" - OJ Simpson', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t bald people use keys? Because they don''t have any locks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think Trump''s wife just goes to show... Immigrants do the jobs average Americans won''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally butt dialed my proctologist once... I told him it was an accident... he said I was full of shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The hardest part about having sex with a tranny is not coming. Because once you come, you regret.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Know why you can''t hear a pterodactyl use the bathroom? The P is silent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call to Donald Trump''s business card? A trump card', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call gambling currency that can''t melt steel beams? Bet fuel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to Ed Sheeran''s girlfriend? She ran.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that animals make a different sounds depending what part of the world you are in....? For example, in China, Dogs makes a sizzling sound! *I know I am going to hell for this but this was an old joke that was told to me. *', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black guy with a parrot on his shoulder walks into a bar The bartender asks: Hey cool, where''d you get it? The parrot says: Africa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do ghosts have trouble meeting girls at bars? Because they''re only there for the boos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Obese people are a very large portion of the population. ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Superman put in his drink? Just ice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst name for a history lesson? A crash course on 9/11', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an agnostic and a dyslexic? Someone who lays awake at night wondering if there really is a dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the squiggly line say to the angle? Your acute. (Squiggly line because gay because squiggly line =/= straight)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did trump say to Chinese president in a phone call? "I will bomb Hiroshima Again"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: As if it isnt broken fucking enough', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Need a joke for valentines card Valentines is tomorrow and i just wondering anyone could tell me a jokes so i can write on it to my gf Thank you!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad won the lottery after having a stroke Guess it was a stroke of luck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For Sale: French WWII Rifle Never fired. Only dropped once.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Trump supporter is glad the election is finally over & can go back to watching his favorite show on MSNBC... he can now keep up with how his cousin, brother, & wife are doing while watching Lockup: Wichita.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Damn girl, are you Muslim? ''cause that ass is bomb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I painted my computer black so that it would run faster, but now it doesn''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it''s yellow, let it mellow If it''s brown, stop it at the border and submit it to extreme vetting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quiet guy in class had this gem of a response Military history class. We have this one guy in class who doesn''t really say much and tends to keep to himself; just figured one of those ''man of few words'' kinda guys. One day, we were discussing the planes used in WW2. Ensuing discussion goes as such Professor: So what planes did we have during that time? Student 1: Well we had the Cobra and Mustang Professor: Ok and what did the Japanese have? Student 2: Japanese had zeros Professor: And what was the main difference between us and them? Quiet kid: We didn''t crash as much The professor tried to keep it together but started rolling, dropped his marker, and said ''Class dismissed''. We had 20 minutes left. Thanks quiet kid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the movie in which a young fat lady gets kidnapped? Its called "Beauty and the feast"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three Nuns Die In a car crash and go to heaven, Sister Margeret, Sister Patricia, and Sister Mary. They meet Peter at the gates of heaven. Peter : " Before any of you get in, you need to wash the part of your body in the fountain of holy water that has been lustfully used to sin" Sister Margeret walks to the fountain and washes her hands. Peter : " Thankyou Sister Margeret you may walk through", Sister Patricia, your next. As Sister Patricia walks up, Sister Mary quickly runs and pushes her out of the way and gets to the fountain first. Peter : "Wait your turn!!!!, you cannot push in like that!!. Sister Mary: " Please!!! , Please!!!, let me wash out my mouth before Sister Patricia puts her ass in it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one muffin say to the other? ''Whew! It''s hot in this oven!'' How did the other muffin reply? ''Holy shit! A talking muffin!'' Go easy on me, it''s my first post to reddit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say people who stammer aren''t idiots But I''m not so sure about that, considering the only word longer than four syllables they know is "T-t-t-t...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A British guy, a Frenchman and a Russian were in a bar debating whether Adam and Eve were British, French, or Russian. The British guy says, " Obviously they were both British, observe how Adam offered Eve some of his apple after he received it from her, true British manners". French guy says: "Non, non, monsieur they were both French. First of all they were both NAKED, and Eve was so feminine and seductive and drove Adam nuts". Russian guy says: "Both of you are wrong. I can prove conclusively that Adam and Eve were nothing but Russian. They had no clothes. They had no heat. All that was left to eat was one lousy apple and they called it paradise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, an Irishman and an American Get drunk in a bar on the top floor of a skyscraper. The American says: "There''s an updraft on the 7th floor that allows you to jump out this window and land on the 4th floor." "Bullshit" says the Irish. So the American jumps from the top floor and sure enough; just as he goes past the 7th floor, he slows down and lands on the 4th. "Fucking fun!" says the Irish guy as he jumps. And falls to his death. "You''re a right cunt when your drunk Superman!" says the Englishman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you give a vampire a concussion? Hit it with a bat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redneck murders are hard to solve. Never any dental records and all the DNA''s the same.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My alarm clock decided to leave me tomorrow. It would''ve left yesterday, but it''s taking its time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Spanish guy rob a train? He had a *loco*-motive', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? About 50 pounds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Luke cage In marvels luke cage everyone thinks that luke has super powers because he''s bullet proof. But bullet proof black people isn''t a super power it''s straight up evolution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My toilet left me today Guess it couldn''t take my crap anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just realized how gay my clothes are. They come out of the closet every morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of deodorant do dwarves use? They don''t like to choose but when they do they pickaxe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone stole my Microsoft Office, and they''re going to pay. You have my Word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The final solution to manspreading. So my Jewish friend informed me that his mom was low key, unimpressed with his "manspreading". I feel bad; the rabbi could avoid all of this by cutting off just a bit more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey Sue, wouldn''t it be lovely to take a nice walk today? "That would be lovely!" Great! Will you bring back some crisps and beer?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have the most boring job of all... I run an oil drill rig.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She was a whisky maker.. ..but I loved her still.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black man standing on a street corner? A crack dealer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Imperial Wizard of the KKK was just found dead near a river in Missouri... Man, the moment the EPA gets threatened people start dropping white trash in our water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t Sean Spicer wear a sign that says everything that comes out of his mouth is BS? Because that would be redundant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Condoms don''t guarantee safe sex anymore.... My friend was wearing one and got shot by the woman''s husband.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Gates and Steve Jobs Talk At A Bar After a Long Day of Gettin'' Money Bill: So I went to the bank yesterday to talk about a loan Steve: What do you need a loan for? Bill: Oh, I don''t. The bank does.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m sorry that I sent you Donald Trump Reddit replies: Username checks out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Michael Jackson and an Xbox? One is turned off by children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do u get when an alien barges into your bathroom while you''re taking a shower? An invasion of privacy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a box of chocolates I don''t like chocolate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the problem with lawyer jokes? Lawyers don''t think they''re funny, and other people don''t think they''re jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb? Apparently not three because my basement is still dark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, what does a fire sit on? It''s Ash', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In some situations in life, I find that you just need a little push. I might be a door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a piano player with no arms or legs? Clever dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Chewbacca''s Chinese cousin? A Fortune Wookie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] If sleeping with an Asian gets you your yellow belt, what do you get when you sleep with a Muslim? A suicide belt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between tired and exhausted? When you run in front of a car, you get tired. When you run behind a car, you get exhausted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adele didn''t originally want to perform at the Grammy''s but they bugged the crap out of her till she said yes. They must''ve called a thousand times.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A death row inmate asks as his last request to talk to Donald Trump. Because he has nothing better to do, Trump agrees and meets with the man the day before his execution. Trump: "So, uh, what did you do?" Inmate: "I shot a bunch of people in a liquor store robbery, burned down a hospital and stole all their drugs, molested farm animals, blew up an orphanage, set homeless people on fire for fun, and sold my mother into sexual slavery in Thailand." Trump: "Wow. And why''d you wanna see me?" Inmate: "Because despite all the horrible things I''ve done, I can take my last comfort in being reminded of one fact - at least I''m not you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Caught my penis cheating on my wife today. Luckily after a few beatings, it learned it''s lesson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you are deaf and you have Parkinson''s... ...is that like having a stutter?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how they say "a woman''s work is never done"? Maybe that is why they get paid less.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ordered 4 drinks at McDonald''s..... ....so they wouldn''t think all 50 chicken nuggets were for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Italian Army tanks have five gears Four reverse, one forward (in case they get attacked from the rear)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a dog played soccer, who would the dog play for? BARKELONA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Grandfather told me my generation is to reliant on technology. I told him, "no Grandpa, yours does." Then I unplugged his life support.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do electrical engineers use to clean up their equations? A handkirchoff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It must suck to have your period on valentines day But an even bigger pain in the ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now that Russia decriminalized spousal beatings.. Men are finally Putin(g) women in their place', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Jim Carrey and Bane have in common? No one cared who they were ''til they put on the mask.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just put my hair in a bun. It wasn''t very nice, I think I''ll try it with a croissant next time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My favourite sport starts with a "T". It''s golf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of hunters from Wyoming are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesnt seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: My friend is dead! What can I do? The operator, in a calm soothing voice, says: Just take it easy. I can help. First, lets make sure hes dead. There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guys voice comes back on the line. He says: OK, now what?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbours named their child "Saturn". That''s not something I''d call my child, but it has got a ring to it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love dead baby jokes Because they never get old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife where she wanted to go for dinner. She said, "Somewhere that has fish." So I pushed her in the river.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Trump think the food stamps program is unnecessary? Because he''s constantly providing us with low hanging fruit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend and I were moving each others comic book collection and now we both have to see a chiropractor. Because we both have back issues.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my wife I''m her trophy husband... Too bad it''s just a participation trophy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('China built a wall... That''s why you don''t see any Mexican in China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk blonde woman was sitting at a bar says to the barman, A drunk blonde woman was sitting at a bar says to the barman, "Barfender, I''d like a marhini for my heartburn." The barman mixes her drink and puts in down in front of her. A few minutes later, she calls him over and says, "Barfender, I''d like a marhini for my heartburn." He rolls his eyes but mixes her drink anyway and sets it down in front of her. A few minutes later, she waves him over again and says, "Barfender, I''d like a marhini for my heartburn." The barman looks her up and down and says, "First off, it''s bartender, not barfender. Second off, it''s martini, not marhini. And third, you don''t have heartburn, your boob is in the ashtray."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Cheesy Joke My family spent all of today calling me by different cheese names. I told them I just wanted to be left provolone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only When you perfect the art of fishing and baiting hooks.. Will you become a Master Baiter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a primate that works out? A Gym-panzee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is there a reason you ate that entire fish sandwich? To be honest, I did it for the halibut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Schools should have a class designed for introverts... *anti-social studies*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer in the USSR comes out of the chambers laughing his head off. A colleague approaches him and asks why he is laughing. "I just heard the funniest joke in the world!" "Well, go ahead, tell me!" says the other judge. "I can''t I just gave someone ten years for it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what is blue and has 27 tits? the trashbag at a cancer clinic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just made life a whole lot simpler for an overweight friend of mine... I explained to him that every restaurant in town is an "all you can eat" place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the internet say to it''s history? "Cache me outside, how ''bout dat?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American man goes on a business trip to Japan. And he arrives there a day early before the meeting. So he decides to enjoy the night-life a little bit. The man goes out to a bar, picks up a lady after having a few drinks, and takes her back to the hotel. Eventually they start having sex and the lady keeps saying, "Oshi Moshi! Oshi Moshi!" The man thought that was weird but he kept going. The next day, he meets some business men on a golf course and sees one of them shank the ball. The guy is absolutely livid and shouts, "Oshi Moshi!" The American man looks at him and asks, "I hate to bother you, but what does ''oshi moshi'' mean?" The golfer replies, "wrong hole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a ginger Mormon? An orang Utahn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the princess marry the barbarian? Because she thought he was brutiful', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Coding Jokes post coding jokes I will <br> your heart', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not fair to compare Trump to Hitler. Hitler appreciated the arts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the most outstanding thing about our illegal immigrants? Their warrants. (Here come the down-votes!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who are the most decent people at a hospital? The ultra sound people', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Harry Potter and the Jews? Harry Potter rode the train back. I''m not apologizing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In which mountain range do fruit trees primarily grow? The Apple-achian mountains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to smoke weed in the 90''s Now I don''t care what temperature it is', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So an Irish man walks out of a pub. What? It could happen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Mary say when she saw Jesus with a massive erection? He has risen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the potato the Russians put into space? They called it Spudnik', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to like going skiing. But that hobby... Went downhill so fast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The government in this town is excellent, and uses your tax dollars efficiently.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate milking cows, every time I do it... It makes me shUDDER.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a wine enthusiast, I am appalled by Trump''s recent executive orders. What right does he have to ban sommeliers from entering this country?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking past a construction site and the guy hammering on the roof called me a paranoid little weirdo... ...in morse code. [Credit goes to Emo Phillips]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a squirrel swim on it''s back? To keep his nuts dry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the drunk guy who got suplexed? He was waisted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How big was the iceberg that sank the Titanic? Cap size', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Uriel Uriel goes to Michael. "I am going to become a muse. Here''s my flaming sword." "What will you use instead?" "My pen, idiot!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some crocodiles can grow 17-20 ft But most have 4', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lost my job today... Told my boss I was always late cause I had diarrhea .. he told me I was full of shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kellyanne Conway gets caught cheating. "How could you? I''ve loved and trusted you and this is how you treat me?" "What about Hillary Clinton''s Emails?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was inquiring about seating for two at a new restaurant and they asked if I had reservations... I said that I had some, but that I was willing to give it a try.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I remember when Squeeze Theorem used to be called The Sandwich Theorem. Damn Political Correctness', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What can you make with epileptic lettuce? A seizure salad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re ever attack by a group of clowns.... Make sure to go for the juggler.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Law and Order In the criminal justice system, sexually-based offenses are considered especially anus. In New York City, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Special Booty Unit. These are their stories.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Germany almost go bankrupt? Because the Holo-cost a lot of money. Anne Frankly, it wasn''t worth it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy Joel walks into a bar. The barman says Bill, I believe this is killing me. As the smile ran away from his face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to be in a horse back riding club... But I got kicked out for horsing around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the egg say when it turned up? Om lit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most OUTSTANDING thing about our illegal immigrants? Their warrents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone just asked me if I''d take a bullet for the last person I had sex with Sure, she''s a bitch, but of course I''d take a bullet for my cousin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to be a car racer... But I didn''t have the drive for it and I drifted away from that career.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The reason for the wage gap is that men have high paying jobs like doctor, lawyer, etc. while women usually have lower paying jobs... ...like female doctor, female lawyer, etc.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the yeast say to the flour? Do you want to make some dough, Sugar?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the easiest way to tell if somebody is vegan? Oh, don''t worry. They''ll tell you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hellen Keller walks into a bar... Then a stool. Then a table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snowboarding seems like the gayest sport. Is involves lubricant for the equipment, you''re quite often on your knees and at the end of the day your butt hurts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A joke for St. Patricks Day What is long, green, and has an asshole every 3 feet? A St. Patricks Day Parade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 Danish guys just tried stealing the toilet paper from my Air BnB bringing shame upon their entire country! Worst viking raid ever!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was telling my dad That the entire team that worked on finding Nemo had to take fish biology 101. Then he says "so does it ever bother you that the fish are talking?" That was the hardest I laughed in a while', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Making love while camping is the best It''s fucking in tents', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My bakery was recently robbed. Now, I''ve seen a lot of robberies before... But this takes the cake!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the snowman no good at big games? He got cold feet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many testicles does an Oak have? Tree', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only mistake I ever made... Was buying a pencil with an eraser on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never forget the pickle on your burgers It''s kind of a big dill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy thats half Mexican and half Chinese that wears only one sneaker? Juan Chu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between male and female? Fe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a mexican use to cut his pizza? Little Caesars', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: Bill Gates has agreed to pay for Trump''s wall On the condition he gets to install windows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man approached the very beautiful..... The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, You know, Ive lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes? Why? Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Son got sent home from school for the third time this year for letting a girl wank him off in class... ...I told him "maybe teaching isn''t for you.."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Hispanic carpenter is feeling depressed After living a life of always reading other people''s directions and instructions to do his job, he decides he wants to to make his *own* decision for once: Committing suicide. So he scribbles down some words on a piece of paper and reviews what he wrote, nodding in approval. He hops into his car in his garage and tapes a garden hose to the exhaust pipe. He starts his car and puts the hose in his mouth, inhaling deeply, anticipating the sweet release of death. Soon after, he succumbs to his poison of choice and falls down, dying slowly as if he was simply falling asleep. His wife comes home and discovers him. Horrified, she sees a piece of paper next to him and picks it up, thinking it will be a suicide note to give her some clarity on what made him choose this terrible act. In familiar handwriting, she sees scribbled on the page: **INSTRUCTIONS** Step 1: Connect Jos to hose B', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs? Cash and carry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would tell you to listen to my favorite Kendrick Lamar song... But it''s just alright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man walks into a bar looking sad..... One night a man walks into a bar looking sad. The bartender asks the man what he wants. The man says Oh just a beer. The bartender asked the man Whats wrong, why are you so down today?. The man said My wife and i got into a fight, and she said she wouldnt talk to me for a month. The bartender said So whats wrong with that? The man said Well the month is up tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Genius, an Old Farmer, and a Boy Scout are on a plane... ...The pilot enters the cabin and says, "I''m terribly sorry. I''ve done everything I can, but the plane is falling and going to crash. Now, there are only 3 parachutes on this plane. I''ve got a wife at home with 2 young kids and another on the way, so I''m going to use one of them." He then picks up a parachute, puts it on, and jumps out of the plane. The Genius says, "I am the smartest person in the world. My death would be a huge loss because of my immense knowledge. I simply must survive this crash." He follows after the pilot. The Old Farmer looks at the Boy Scout and says, "Well, son, I''ve lived a long, fulfilling life. You have your whole future ahead of you. You take the last parachute." The Boy Scout replies, "Don''t worry sir, we''ll both survive. The Genius took my backpack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It doesn''t matter, because feminists can''t change anything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old lady was talking to her husband on Valentine''s day evening.... "Dear, honestly answer this. What did you think when you saw me the first time 50 years ago?" He says "I thought I so want to suck your titties dry and fuck your brains out..." Wife giggles hearing this answer. While biting her lips she says "Well... what do you think of me now?" He says without skipping a beat " I think I did a fairly good job!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lovely woman is first in line at a bus stop. The bus opens its doors to let her on. She lifts her leg for the step and funds she cannot reach it. She realizes it must be her tight dress and reaches back and unzips it a little bit. Again, she brings her leg up and still cannot reach the first step of the bus. A little more embarrassed, she reaches back again and unzips her dress a good deal more. But again, her foot falls just short of the step. Finally she reaches back and unzips the dress almost all the way. At this point the young man behind her reaches forward, grabs her by the hips and lifts her to the step. Infuriated, she turns and nearly screams, "And what made you think you had permission to touch me like that!?" The man calmly replies, "Well, after you reaches back and unzipped my fly three times I kinda figured we were friends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Whatever it is it''s heading straight for the world trade center.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the people that became octophobes after going to the buffet? They eight too much!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t understand how people of color can be discriminated against Aren''t we all hue, man?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend said I need to moisturize I told her I moist my eyes every day when I think of what Europe has become.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do when a epileptic''s having a fit in the bath? Throw your washing in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be addicted to the hokey pokie But then I turned myself around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Italians are fighting Americans in the trenches An American gets the idea to yell the name Luigi, and being a common Italian name when someone hears their name and looks up, they shoot him. "Hey, Luigi!" An Italian looks up and says "Yeah?" BANG After the Americans do this a few times, the Italians try it for themselves. They decide to yell the name John, being a common American name. "Hey-a, John!" An American shouts back "Hey! Is that you Luigi?" The Italian looks up "Yeah, itsa me!" BANG', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black man, a mexican man and an asian walk into a bar... and they are all accepted and welcomed. Now isn''t that refreshing?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call pasta made by a jamaican sex pest? Harrastapasta', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My in-laws couldn''t cope when their cat had 9 kittens, so my wife told me to put them in a sack and dump them in the river. I did it, but it broke my heart. I quite liked her dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baby are you an ether? Coz you get my pp up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that if a girl has a lot of sex with guy she''s a slut... But if a guy does it he''s gay?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A failed tv presenter, a disgraced newspaper editor and a phone hacker walk into a bar.... ..and the barman says "What''ll it be, Piers?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are arguing over what to watch... The first man wants to watch horse racing. The second man wants to watch women''s tennis. The third man wants to watch a childbirth video. As they each try to grapple for the remote, the channels continue to change. This is what their neighbours heard: And they''re off! Uhhh-Uhhh And a baby is born!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the gay Irishmen? Phillip Dune and James Mcavity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the clothes store where all women''s pants were half-off. But all the women there were fully dressed. Fucking liars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by vomiting on a cute co-worker I told her, "Next time, lunch is on me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People are like trashcans When you step on their feet, their mouth opens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I come from a town where you have to keep a whale on you at all times. If you don''t, they issue you a cetacean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey Hitler, where are the showers? >They are down the hall, on the third reich.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The oven and the woman are just alike Because you have to get them both hot before you stick the meat in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to fix the wage gap. Wagegap', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Doc say to Scotty? Great Scott.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doorbell rang so the son went to open the door. - How is it? - I''m the house owner, I''m here to collect rent. - Mom! It''s the owner. Do you have money or should I go play outside again?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you never buy a twin a basket of fruit? Because they come in pairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke about the Earth''s rotation Just made my day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cabinet members does it take to screw in a light bulb? All of them but they still can''t do it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear what NASA''s new slogan will be once their budget is cut? "NASA: The Sky''s The Limit"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Early in the morning, the father knocks at his son''s door and yells, "Wake up, son! Time to go to school." Sleepy, the son mumbles to his dad, "Listen, Pops... I''m not going to school today for three basic reasons: first of all because I''m dead tired, second because I hate that school and third because I''ve had it with those punks!" To which the father answers from outside the door, "Well, you''re going for three reasons: first of all because you have a duty to perform, second because you''re 45 and third because you''re the school principal!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If space aliens landed in the U.S. today they would say Take us to your leader', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m 35 and I''ve never been in a serious relationship. My wife wouldn''t like to hear that, though.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, what''s difference between Trump and Goatse.cx? I can''t tell cause they''re both YUUUUGE assholes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog that pees on the mat? Ono-mat-o-poeia', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what is it called when your crush has a crush on you too? Imagination.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Today''s topic is DEMOCRACY Teacher: What is Democracy? Students: Today''s topic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked into a bar It really hurt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t believe you blew your co-worker! Girlfriend: I didn''t, I swear Me: Oh come on, cough it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what''s the difference between neil armstrong and michael jackson? neil armstrong walked on the moon and michael jackson fucked little kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''''Your eyes sparkle like diamonds'''' So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says ''''Your eyes sparkle like diamonds''''. I said, ''''Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck''''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate flying back from China It''s really disorienting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Jews get circumcised? 1. Because Jewish women won''t touch anything that isn''t at least 10% off. 2. Because they never leave a tip. 3. Because there''s no end to those pricks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend was standing and looking in the bedroom mirror ... She wasn''t happy with what she saw, and said to me, "I feel horrible. I look fat and ugly. Could you give me a compliment?" I looked over at her and said, "Well, your eyesight is perfect."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honey, I think I''m ugly.... So I pulled her infront of a mirror, stood right next to her and said: "Darling, I mean look a that sexy smile, that beautiful hair and those eyes....Just wow. No wonder you feel ugly next to me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who the fuck does Bernie Sanders think he is? Not MY president!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of scientists run an experiment on a frog They teach it to jump on command by using flies as treats. Now when they say "Jump" the frog jumps. Then they chop off one leg. They say "Jump" and the frog jumps in a crooked path. So far so good. Finally, they chop off the other leg. They say "Jump" and the frog does not jump. It has been concluded that frogs cannot hear without their legs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which Netflix show best sums up America today? Orange Is the New Black.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She didn''t realize tapping him on the shoulder would make him do this. A lady in a taxi leaned forward to ask the driver a question. She gently tapped his shoulder to get his attention. The driver screamed, lost control of the cab and nearly hit a bus. He drove over the curb, almost going through a shop window. For a few moments the inside of the cab was silent. The shaken driver turned and said, "Are you ok? I''m very sorry, but you scared the piss out of me!" The passenger, very startled at this point, apologizes to the driver and says "I didn''t realize a mere tap on the shoulder could scare some one so bad" The driver replied "no, no, I''m the one who is sorry, today is my first day driving a cab. I''ve been driving a hearse for over 20 years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What direction did the pirate go to get his bread?? Yeast!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John robbed some coffee from Starbucks the other day. The police are charging him for mugging.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I lost 10kg last week I can''t seem find that dumbbell anywhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell if a blond has been working at your computer? There''s white out all over the screen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t wait for the 14th It will be the 68th anniversary of the Bank of England opening', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When did the nerd get out of bed? 13:37', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a Beer Festival in London, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer. Corona''s president sits down and says, "Seor, I would like the world''s best beer, a Corona." The bartender takes a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him. Then Budweiser''s president says, "I''d like the best beer in the world, give me ''The King Of Beers'', a Budweiser." The bartender gives him one. Coors'' president says, "I''d like the best beer in the world, the only one made with Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors." He gets it. The guy from Guinness sits down and says, "Give me a Coke." The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask, "Why aren''t you drinking a Guinness?" The Guinness president replies, "Well, if you guys aren''t drinking beer, neither will I."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Helen Keller have yellow legs? Her dog was blind too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do women have trouble parking? Guys always give them the wrong idea of what six inches is!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So everyone is appreciating Newton for inventing gravity... ...well, I don''t. We could''ve all been flying now if it wasn''t for that goddamn apple.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I get home from work, my wife lets me put my feet up... When we first met, I stuggled to get two fingers up...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a good joke and A bad joke timing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor said I had 10 hours to live So I killed him and the judge gave me 30 years!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your girlfriend starts smoking Slow down and start using a lubricant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the two gay Irishmen? William Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzwilliam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Policeman stops a tandem. Excuse me sir. I think you''ve lost your wife back down the road. Thank god for that. I thought I''d gone deaf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the hipster burn his lips? He ate his pizza before it was cool', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have Picturegraphic memory. Is that the word; picturegraphic? Can''t remember long words.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what if I don''t know what ''few'' means? It doesn''t mean a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t Alabama have calculus teachers. They don''t like integration.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t cheese want to be sliced? It had grater plans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My lesbian friend is very ill& It seems she''s lacking vitamin D.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my girlfriend I''d buy her a wedding ring if she gave me a blowjob. She''s a sucker for love.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bought Animal Skin Jackets at 60% off. It was a great *offur.*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish people would stop acting like Chuck Norris is a god If he really is so good why doesn''t he teleport behind me and slam my head into the keyboard then hhjfdjusodbfhzoakcblkqoscsnjqpqkc', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rabbi and the bicycle A visibly upset man goes to see his rabbi one day and says: "Rabbi, you won''t believe what happened to me! Last week, someone stole my bicycle from the synagogue!" The rabbi is deeply upset by this, but after thinking for a moment, he offers a solution: "Next week come to services, sit in the front row, and when we recite the Ten Commandments, turn around and look at the people behing you. And when we got to ''Thou shalt not steal,'' see who can''t look you in the eyes and that''s your guy." The rabbi is very pleased with his suggestion, and so is the man. And next service, the rabbi is very curious to learn whether his advice worked. He waits for the man by the doors of the synagogue, and asks him "So dit it work? " "Like a charm," the man answers. "The moment we got to ''Thou shalt not commit adultery,'' I remembered where I left my bicycle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dentist: This will hurt. Patient: OK. Dentist: I''ve been having an affair with your wife since last year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I wonder Why is that frisbee getting bigger? And then it hits me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I made my girlfriend puke She likes dirty talk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cashews are expensive, almonds are expensive. Peanuts are cheaper. How about deer nuts? You find them under a buck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me I should start deadlifting. Otherwise the police would certainly find the body.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear what happened to the tap dancer.. He fell into the sink', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Warning: Game of Thrones Spoilers Will make your car look fucking stupid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People are like bananas Nobody likes the black ones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between fingering and fondling? About 12 years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the Bald Eagle is the symbol of freedom and the Dove is the symbol of peace, what bird is the symbol of love? The swallow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you tell jokes women on their periods? Because they always OVARY-act!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do women have legs? Have you ever seen the mess a snail leaves behind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you titillate an ocelot? You oscillate its tit a lot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cows wear bells Because their horns don''t work', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not easy being a self made man Unless you have an Oedipus complex and a time machine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump and Princess Toadstool have in common? They both say "Im Peach?" in the same tone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady goes to the doctor, for results of a test she took. Doctor: Mrs. Jones, I have some great news for you! Lady: Miss, not Mrs. Doctor: Miss Jones, I have some bad news for you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the marsupial who was rejected at his job interview? He didn''t meet any of the *koala*fications', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentine''s Day is coming But it looks like YOU won''t be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two antennas get married . . . . . . the ceremony was average but the reception was outstanding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman tells her husband that she''s giving up sex for lent... A woman is laying in bed with her husband and says "This year for Lent, I''m going to give up having sex." The husband says, "What? That''s crazy!" She replies, "Well, not with everyone. Just with people I don''t love or care about." Incensed, the husband yells, "How many people are you sleeping with?!" "Just you, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a content Asian woman? Lo-Meintenance', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Piglet: [screaming] Help! Tigger: Oh, relax, Piglet, old pal. There''s no difference between plunging 10,000 feet to the jagged rocks below and tumbling out of bed. Piglet: Oh? Really? . Tigger: Why, sure! [Tigger starts laughing for a few seconds, then puts his right paw on his chin, with his left paw on his right elbow] Tigger: Except for the splat at the end they''re practically similar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Old Man A very old, decrepit old man walked into the catholic church and sat down in a confessional. A priest greeted the old man who proceeded to tell the priest about this beautiful young woman he had met and was having so much fun with. They were partying and spending the night in each other arms and he was just having the best time in the world. So the priest asked him if he and this lady were married. "Oh no, we''re not married," he said. So the priest said, "okay, say 7 Hail Mary''s ..." and the old man said, "What''s a Hail Mary?" The priest said, "Aren''t you catholic?" to which the man replied that he was not. So the priest asked what he was doing there then, and the man said, "Oh, I''m telling everybody."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mommy, how did I get my name? A little girl asks her mother. "You and your sisters all got your name the same way, we named you Rose because when you were a newborn a rose petal landed on your face." She answered. "So my name is Raven because a bird landed on me?" Her sister asked. Mom nodded. "HUUHNALAGAH!!!" The third sister said. "Shut up Refrigerator."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s very difficult to gather mushrooms in Chernobyl they scramble in all directions when you walk up to them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A riddle: "I''m twenty-two. Hold are you, dad?" His dad replies, "Son, I''m your age, plus half of my own." How old is his father? . . . . . . . . . . . . . Answer: 74, Alzheimers just caught him early.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something about my mom''s vagina feels odd to me but I can''t put my finger on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Fireman A man worked at the Fire Dept. and came home one night suggesting to his wife that they could sort of do the same thing as he did when he went to fight fires. He said, "I could come home and say Bell 1 and we could run to the bedroom; Bell 2 and we could take our clothes off; and Bell 3, we could start messing around." So the wife agreed. The next night the man came home and said "Bell 1" and they ran to the bedroom; "Bell 2" and they took off their clothes; "Bell 3" and they began to mess around. Then the wife said "Bell 4." "What does that mean?" he said to which she replied: "More hose, you''re nowhere near the fire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re playing poker like a Buddhist... ...you''re working on the eight fold path', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s wall will cost 21.6 billion, Nasa''s budget is only 19 billion Probably because Mexico has more aliens', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop shows up to a gory car wreck (long) A cop shows up to a gory car wreck and immediately sees several body parts lying around. He takes out his pen and pad to make some notes for his report. "Left arm - found in ditch" "Left leg - found in ditch" ~~"Head - found in bulavard~~ ~~"Head - found in boulavard~~ *kick* "Head - found in ditch"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, I breathed air in modern america. Now the PC police are arresting me for theft of air.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johny To Teacher Little johny was sitting in class doing maths problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, " Johny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left??? "None," Johny replied, " cause the rest would fly away" Teacher, " Well, the answer is four" , but i like the way are you thinking. Johny, teacher i have a question for you, if there were 3 women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, second was biting her cone and third was sucking her cone, which one is married? Teacher ( nervously ), "Well", I guess the third which was sucking the cone, Johny, "No" , the one with the wedding ring on her finger, "but, I like the way you are thinking".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican and a black person are riding in a car. Who''s driving? A cop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most pre-historic vegetables have been lost to time... But the beet goes on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a Jew are sitting on a bridge... ... The man sticks his foot in the water and says, "The water is quite cold." The Jew sticks his nose in and says, "It is also very deep."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of Fibonaccis walk into the bar The first two walk up to the bar. The bartender looks at them sternly and says, "One of you two better fuckin'' order something."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had the worst first day of work ever today! ... looking back, maybe I should have noticed something was sketchy about the job posting... "Now hiring at county jai. Position available: Massage Therapist... Space not provided."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did the proctologist go to college? Pro State University I''ll see myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally quit drinking . . .at about 3 o''clock in the morning. (You guys can have that one.) <3', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a Black guy walks into a bar with a beautiful parrot on his shoulder... The bartender says "Wow, that''s something real special you''ve got there! Where''d you get it?" "Africa!", says the parrot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the vegetables say at the garden party? Lettuce turnip the beet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this man who walked into a bar and..... There was this man who walked into a bar and says to the bartender 10 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What''s the matter?" The man says, "I found out my brother is gay and marrying my best friend." The next day the same man comes in and orders 12 shots of whiskey. The bartenders asks, "What''s wrong this time?" The man says, "I found out that my son is gay." The next day the same man comes in the bar and orders 15 shots of whiskey. Then the bartender asks, "Doesn''t anyone in your family like women?" The man looks up and says, "Apprently my wife does."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not retarded! I just appear slow because my intellect and wit are respectively so massive and quick, that they are subject to relativistic time dilation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the Green Man lives in the Green House and the Blue Man lives in the Blue House, who lives in the White House? The Orange Man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what the best place to get the most unbiased news from? The weather channel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the boy leave the angyr orchestra? There was too much violins', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a metalhead''s favourite spud? Mosh-pitatoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grocery store employee approaches a wise-looking Indian man wearing a turban and a luxuriously long beard The employee tells the man, "Sir, you should see a doctor!" "Why do you say that?" he responds, puzzled. "Because you''re looking a little Sikh!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dolphin goes into the bar. The barman says, ''Well, that was a bloody big tsunami!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do lawyers wear to court? *Lawsuits*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Lady Gaga like her steaks? Raw Raw RaAaAw', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I made an accidental pun today... I guess it was kinda "PUNintentional"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I slept with my girlfriends dad... But she''s a twin so it''s an easy mistake right?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A customer walks in a minute before closing and asks if the store is still open. The clerk responds, "As open as a casket at a funeral. I shouldn''t be, but I am."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Goatse and Donald Trump? None at all. They''re both yuuge assholes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lynx walks into a bar A lynx walks into a bar and says "Hey Barkeep! Mix me up a... ... ... Jackrabbit." The bartender says, "you got it buddy, but what''s with the big paws?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I masturbate with soap Just thought I should come clean', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m thirsty Hello Thursday, I''m Friday. Let''s go out Saturday and have a Sunday', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was trying to understand how horse''s reflexes work And then it hit me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I fucked a fat chick in an elevator. It was wrong in so many levels...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Muslim, a Mexican, and a white Southern voter? A Muslim gets permission to come to America but then they take it back. A Mexican doesn''t wait for permission to come to America but then they send him back. A white Southern voter acts like he''s on a mission to stab America in the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This girl said she never wants to see me again I guess you can say she gave me a wrist-training order', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I could tell you a black joke, but you heard Jamal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Moses comes down from Mt Sinai and stands before the people "I have good news and I have bad news. The good news is that I got him down to ten. The bad news is that he''s adamant about the adultery bit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Liverpool FC have banned the Sun from their stadium. Seems kind of pointless, I mean it always rains in England anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently had sex with a girl who I thought I was legal age A wave of horror came over me when I noticed her toe tag said "15 years old"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the African baby crying? It was going through it''s midlife crisis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Going To The Movies I told my wife I wanted to watch a movie about a billionaire playboy with a penchant for darkness, inflicting violence and dressing up in masks. She got excited and asked, "Are we really go to see *50 Shades*?" I laughed and told her I was talking about *The Lego Batman Movie*.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] I''m going to get lightning bolts tattooed on my penis It never strikes the same place twice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Uncle Ben''s favorite condiment? Aunt Mayonnaise', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s my idea of foreplay? Half an hour of begging', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get on top of a Mexican restaurant? Use an enchiladar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I heard today... Trump''s wall budget is 3 Billion more than NASA''s budget for the year...apparently NASA doesn''t deal with as many aliens as trump does.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dominatrix is busy training a new assistant... I guess she''s showing her the ropes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What pronouns should you use with a chocolate bar? Her/she', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend once asked me, "If you could have any super power in the world what would it be?" I told him: "Cold war Russia"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks the ice cream truck man. boy : "Do you have onion flavoured Ice cream ?" man : " sorry, no I don''t" the boy says " ok" then walks away. the next day the boy comes again " do you have onion flavored ice cream ? " asks the boy again. the man replies " sorry, I don''t have any" the boy walks away but also comes back the next day asking the same question, and gets the same reply the man decides to get onion flavored ice cream just to sell it to the boy, "if he asked for it so many times he probably will buy a lot" he thought. the next day as suspected to boy comes and asks " do you have onion flavored ice cream " the man says : " yes! a whole lot of it too" the boy : " haha that sucks, who would buy that shit" and walks away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My teacher said, because I was acting up in class, I have to do a book report on the largest bone in the arm. Isn''t that humorous?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do politicians always claim to be religious? Because sects sells.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For me, Divorce is like Algebra. I look at my X and wonder Y.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the claustrophobic ninja do when he fell down a well? He flipped out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Country people would usually have a rooster to wake them up and the city people would have an alarm clock So that means that city people wake up to a clock and country people wake up to a cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a person who doesn''t like Soviet Russia? A citizen of Soviet Russia', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She was only a statistician''s daughter but her deviations were anything but standard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be careful this winter... I saw black guys slip on black ice and get black eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She was only a roadworker''s daughter but she sure liked having her asphalt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m eating that p*ssy Teacher asked, Why is your cat with u in school? Kid says (crying), "I heard daddy tell mommy, I''m eating that p*ssy when the kids leave!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a triangle that gets into a car accident? A rektangle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No actually I am not single I am taken For granted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the way little children run towards the waves of the ocean but back up the very last second? That''s the exact same way I flirt with girls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For Valentine''s Day, me and the girlfriend are just gonna stay in and watch a movie. Can anyone recommend a good girlfriend?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Gordon Ramsey like to have sex with a condom? Because he hates it raw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the registered donor who had a car crash on the Golden Gate Bridge? He left his heart in San Francisco.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a McDonalds. He sees an elderly couple with one Happy Meal. They take out all of the food, lay it out on the table, and start splitting it. They split the burger in half, split the fries into two equal piles, etc. But what strikes the man as odd is that only the husband begins eating. So the man walks over and says, "I can buy you another Happy Meal if you like." The elderly woman replies, "Oh no, we share everything." The man waits, and only the old man continues eating. The woman sits there and watches. So he goes back over and says, "Ma''am, I would be *honored* to buy you another Happy Meal." "Oh no," she replies, "you misunderstand. We share *everything*." Slightly exasperated, the man asks, "Then what are you waiting for?" The elderly woman replies, "The dentures, of course!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bought a farewell card for only a penny... It was a good buy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopuss.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde''s phone rang in the middle of the night A blonde''s phone rang in the middle of the night. "Hello?" she said. "Hello," said a voice. "Is this Tommy?" "No," said the blonde. "You must have the wrong number." "Oh, sorry," said the caller. "I hope I didn''t wake you." "Oh, that''s okay," said the blonde. "I had to get up anyway, to answer the phone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the mad scientist deliberately create a huge fire tornado? Some people just want to watch the whirled burn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the US stops minting pennies, 99 deals will disappear because they won''t make cents any more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do squirrels and my girlfriend have in common? Both of them love stuffing their cheeks with nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, look! I''m a 3D printer! "Chris, close the god damn door if you''re taking a shit"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted a new highscore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up as an alter boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something for cooking on a stove. A metallic sculpture of a marijuana leaf. Donald Trump. Tin pot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last night me and my girlfriend watched three DVDs back to back Luckily I was the one facing the TV', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb? Oh. You''re still doing that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once when on a date with a girl who didn''t swallow. There was soup everywhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two goats on top of a hill... There are two goats on top of a hill eating grass. One says to the other I wish this was the kind of grass that gets you high. The other says did we not just climb this hill?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are aspirins white? Because they work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I woke up this morning and my bedside light had turned into a moth... That''s the last time I ever buy a larva lamp&', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anybody here have sex while camping? It''s fucking intense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate left-handed people. Something about them just doesn''t seem right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks his mom why he''s black and she''s white She says, "Don''t even go there. The way that party went, you''re lucky you don''t bark."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The woman in the store A woman walks into a store. Billy the clerk and the manager are talking away, and the woman asks the clerk where some stuff is. Woman: "Excuse me sir, do you know where the Kleenex, toilet paper, ear cleaners, napkins, and tampons are? The manager replies with, "Dear Lord Billy, help her! She''s leaking from every hole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a boy scout and a jew? One comes back from camp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I could tell you a Mexican joke but it would cross the border.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Minecraft Minecraft - the sequel to Mein Kampf', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind guy walks into a bar... A blind guy walks into a bar with his seeing eye dog. He makes his way through the crowded joint to order a beer from the bar. After a few sips the man casually grabs the slack from the leash, and proceeds to swing the dog by its neck around his head like a helicopter. Several terrified patrons scream, "what the hell are you doing?!?" Casually, yet slightly offended, the man replies, "geez, relax, I''m just looking around."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just a list of movies from recent years Everybody wants some: Our Little Sister Victoria, The Neon Demon American Honey; Dr Strange, Son of Saul; The Clan. Love and Friendship - The Club. Room. Wiener-dog. Sausage Party. High Rise. Mustang. Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them. Fast And Furious 7. Arrival, Joy, Zootopia. Deadpool. The Hateful 8.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gynecologist: Do you know what your asshole is doing while you are having an orgasm?? Beautiful young patient: Probably golfing with his buddies...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Nixon say when his pasta got criticized? I am not a cook.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a rebel base and a Pakistan school? I don''t know I''m just a drone pilot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the geologist win his lawsuit? By taking advantage of the quartz system.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone that occasionally likes gloves? Intermitten', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a TechStore She says: "Can i have that TV over there?" The Man on the Counter replies: "No because you''re blonde". The next day the Blonde decides to put on a brunette wig and goes back into the store and asks again: "Can i have that TV over there?" The Man on the Counter, again replies: "No because you''re blonde!" the blonde is completely bewildered at why he knew that she was blonde! so she tries again the next day with a red wig, again the same respone, and so on and on with always different wigs. Then one day she asks: "OKAY! HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT I''M BLONDE?" The man replies: "Because that a f*cking microwave"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rick Astley will let you borrow you any movie in his Pixar collection... Except for one: hes never gonna give you UP!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that there''s a new shortcut in the PC version of GTA V, which when you press it, will cause your character to kill minorities. Alt-right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A jew walks into a bar... It was a dozen kilograms and he sold it for a grand', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which song is the most salty? Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Hey, Jude', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women are sitting at a bus stop... They''re both smoking, and it starts to rain. One if them out her cigarette out, and the other took out a condom to put over the cigarette so she could continue smoking. The woman looks at the one with the condom and says, "wow that''s neat, what is it and where can I get one?" The other woman replies, "it''s a condom, you can get them at any of your locals pharmacies." So the woman walks to a nearby pharmacy. She goes up to the counter and asks the cashier, "hey can I have a pack of condoms please?" The cashier says, "sure what size?" To which she replies, "the size that can fit a camel."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the man say after eating a Big Mac, a McRib, a bucket of KFC, and a Arby''s brisket? Nothing. He died of a heart attack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought some shoes from a drug dealer I don''t know what they were laced with but I kept tripping', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Communism is a trash can ideology When you''re eating out of a trash can it doesn''t sound half bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish man walks into a bar... He sits down and orders a drink. After a while he gets bored and tells the bartender "Bartender... Tell me a funny joke." The bartender tells him "Hitler killed millions of Jews and one clown." The Jewish man, dumbfounded, tells him "... I don''t get it. Why the clown?" The bartender "See, nobody ever gives a shit about the Jews."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kids of the 2010''s will get this... Smartphones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you comfort a grammar buff? There, their, they''re.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floor? It was just a stage he was going through.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('which came first the chicken or the egg? the chicken because eggs cant cum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the sugar hang out with the tomoto? He wanted to ketchup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just bought a replica of the Knight Rider car. The previous owner said it was a *KITT* car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who wins a race between a gay couple and lesbian couple? The lesbians. Because they go lickety split and the gay guys poke ass along.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your gunna tell a joke about a midget being smothered in honey.... Keep it short and sweet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come american cops always lose at pool? Because they always shoot down the black one first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich man needs to paint his entire mansion So he asks to 3 people for the price: A Chinese, a German and a Brazilian. The Chinese says: It''ll cost 2 million dollars. 1,5 million for painting, half a million for profit. The German says: It''ll cost 4 million. 2,5 million for the painting and 1,5 million for profit The Brazilian says: It''ll cost 10 million. You get 4 million, I get 4 million, and give 2 for the Chinese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a joke that was funny in early America, but is even more hilarious in the present day middle east? "Women''s rights" *^ba-dum ^ching*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bass drop In school, I once dropped the base. The kid next to me got severe alkali burns. . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens to a penis after sex? Natural In-Stink', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At church one sunday... I was praying to God about some new trainers i want, when all of a sudden, a tall white haired man appears saying in a deep voice "I A GOD" a little stunned i dont believe the white bearded man, "prove it" i say, then poof my brand new trainers appear before me now, flabbergasted i ask "wow, so out of all the prayers why did you answer mine, about some trainers?" God then looks at me and says "well, i got bored of giving kids in Africa AIDS"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Would you like a drink? "I have a boyfriend!" "I''m the barkeeper you stupid cunt"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our neighbours criticized our new fence We took offense', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('RIP Jobs What did the unemployed cancer cell say? "We should get Jobs"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys were found trespassing in the city lake They were put on trial and the judge called them in one by one Judge: What were you doing in the lake after 9 pm? Man 1: Your honor, I was blowing bubbles. Man 1 exits, Man 2 comes in Judge: What were you doing in the lake after 9 pm? Man 2: Your honor, I was blowing bubbles. Man 2 exits, Man 3 comes in Judge: Dont tell me you were blowing bubbles too. Man 3: No sir my name is Bubbles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man walks into a bar looking sad..... One night a man walks into a bar looking sad. The bartender asks the man what he wants. The man says Oh just a beer. The bartender asked the man Whats wrong,why are you so down today?. The man said My wife and i got into a fight,and she said she wouldnt talk to me for a month. The bartender said So whats wrong with that? The man siad Well the month is up tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the midget fortune teller who escaped prison? They''re a small medium at large.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Surprise oral will make your day Surprise anal will make your hole weak', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman to her girlfriend: My husband got me a dozen roses; tonight I guess I have no choice but to spread eagle with my legs in the air. Girlfriend: Don''t you have a vase?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate seeing penises and people peeing Looks like I am allergic to peanuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever hear that black people have a speech impediment? Not true, its just a myff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once saw a Chupacabras... Baby goats are so adorable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Reposter walked into... /r/jokes. The End', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think I was good in bed..... Until my girlfriend told me she had asthma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son : "Daddy, I fell in love & want to date this awesome girl!" Father : "That''s great son. Who is she?" Son: "It''s Tina, the neighbor''s daughter". Father : "Ohhh I wish you hadn''t said that.I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.Tina is actually your sister." The boy is naturally bummed out, but a couple of months later Son : "Daddy, I fell in love again and she is even hotter!" Father : "That''s great son. Who is she?" Son: "It''s Peny, the other neighbor''s daughter." Father : "Ohhhh I wish you hadn''t said that. Peny is also your sister." This went on couple of times and the son was so mad,he went straight to his mother crying. Son : "Mum I am so mad at dad ! I fell in love with six girls but I can''t date any of them because daddy is their father!" The mother hugs him affectionately and says: "My love, you can date whoever you want. Don''t listen to him. He is not your Father."!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''d think glass would taste like rocks.. But it just tastes like blood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sticky? A stick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Richard Spencer squeal after getting punched in the face? *"I''m Nazi bad person here!"*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Australians wear under their pants? Down Undies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can count the number of times I''ve been to Chernobyl on one hand It''s seven', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stoner goes to the doctor A stoner goes to the doctor complaining he sees cats playing soccer every night when he falls asleep. The doctor recommends he stays up for a night. Stoner says ok but he can''t miss the final tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a joke about time travel.... ... But you guys didnt like it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story... Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out the turtle was 6 feet tall and knew karate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who called it election and not.. Pikachu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you never see an African in Olympic swimming? You need water to swim', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so stupid... She brought a spoon to the superbowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl asks a boy "What does your dad do for a living?'''' He replies "He''s a magician." She asks "Is he good?" He says "Yeah, he disappeared 8 years ago."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alec Baldwin has been arrested. His lawyers believe on Trumped up charges.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do we live on a giant rock, but ruled by money? Because paper beats rock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My therapist recommended an anonymous community to me, a narcissist. Said that they gather and discuss their day to day accomplishments, annoyances, etc. I told him I''ve been using Reddit for a couple months now and see no changes. I then saw myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First time grandparents go to visit the new baby After traveling several hours, enjoying dinner, and meeting the baby, the grandparents decided to spend the night. The grandparents, being older, had trouble sleeping. The grandfather rolled over, tapped on the grandmother'' shoulder, and asked, "would you like to do some laundry?" This had been their code word for sex for many years. The grandmother was beside herself. "Here? In your child''s and new grandchild''s house? That''s disgusting!" The grandfather sighed and rolled over. After dosing off for a few hours, the grandmother woke up, tapped the grandfather on the shoulder and said, "I think everyone else is asleep. We can do some laundry now!" The grandfather yawned and replied, "Don''t worry about that, dear. I just had a small load, so I did it by hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one gamer do to the other gamer after he lost? Consoled him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are the polar ice caps melting Because polar bears are a hot animal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde car A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had 200,000 miles on it. One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it''s not legal." "That doesn''t matter," replied the blonde, "If I only can sell the car. "Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the counter in your car back to 50,000 miles. Then it should not be a problem to sell your car anymore." The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?" "No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 60,000 miles on it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A: What comes after 75? B: 76 A: That''s the spirit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to cut and burn myself. Then I took culinary classes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad: You know son, if you keep masterbating, you''re going to go blind Me: Dad, I''m over here', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After death, what is the only organ in the female body which remains warm? My penis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you go to the beach and forget your lunch, what can you eat? Just eat the sand which is there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TV for sale A man walks by a garage sale and he sees a flat screen TV, he asks the seller "how much''s the TV? Seller: 1 Dollar. Man: What? One dollar!, how come it''s so cheap? S: The valume is stuck on the highest option. M: Is that it, is there anything else I should know? S: Nope thats it M: Wow, You can turn that down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy goes to a ballgame... ...finds his seat and sees an elderly fellow in the next row with an empty seat beside him. They get to chatting and he asks if the seat is taken: "Not anymore. My wife and I used to go to all the games together, but she died. This is the first game I''ve been to since!" "Oh, I''m so sorry. Couldn''t you give the ticket to a friend, or a family member?" "Nah. They''re all at the funeral."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me. It means a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two chemists walk into a bar The first one says "I think I''ll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I''ll have water too." The first chemist now has to rethink the assassination.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the weather in Seattle compare to the rest of the United States? It''s Rainier!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sees a pregnant woman laughing He asks the woman, she replies "Nothing, it''s an inside joke!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who stereotypes Asians? A Rice-ist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone has secrets Billy, learned at school that everybody has secrets. So, he decided to take advantage of it. His mom, obviously scared to death: "Here, take 100 euros and say NOTHING to your father about it, okay?" "Okay mommy!" says Billy and leaves the room with a big smile on his face. When his dad came from work, he did the same to him as well: "Daddy, daddy! I found out everything!" Numb, his father puts his hand on his pocket: "Here, take 350 euros and say NOTHING to your mother, okay?" "Okay!" says Billy with a bigger smile on his face. The next morning, on his way to school, he sees the Postman. He thought he could try it to him too: "Mr. Focker, I know everything!" The Postman, the minute he heard it, fell on his knees and wide opened his arms: "Then come to Daddy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men are driving along a rural road when the driver spots a sheep with it''s head stuck in the fence... The driver pulls the car over and walks over to the sheep. The passenger watching this assumes he got out to help. The driver, not having intercourse for the longest time, drops his pants and starts sodomizing the sheep. The passenger is shocked and yells out the window, "What the hell are you doing?!". The driver, mid-stroke yells back, "I''m fucking this sheep, you want some of this?". So the passenger gets out of the car and sticks his head in the fence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Billy drop his ice cream He got run over by the ice-cream truck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy with a wooden eye asked a girl with a hairy lip to the prom... Seeing how nobody else would likely go with them, the boy with the wooden eye asks the girl with the hairy lip, "Would you like to go to Prom with me?". The girl with the hairy lip, surprised and excited says, "Would I!?". "HAIRY LIP", replied the boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Obama''s going to open a home food preservation supply store next It''s called "Yes We Can"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just found out my best friend, Jos, is moving away. !No guey, Jos!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A joke my nursing teacher told the class A new nurse on the psychiatric ward goes into a patient''s room to talk the patient and check up on her. The nurse asks the patient "How are you doing today?" The patient says "That''s no way to address me!" "What do you mean?" replies the nurse "You should address someone of my stature with respect and humility!" said the patient indignantly "Oh, I should? And why is that?" asked the nurse "Because, I am the Queen!" the patient exclamed "Really now? And who told you that?" The nurse asked skeptically "God did!" replied the patient "Did not!" shouted the patient from down the hall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A plane is crashing with President Trump... A plane is crashing with President Trump, an old man, a little boy and the pilot. Dont ask questions. Just accept this situation. :) The plane is nearing the ground and the group is dicussing who gets the only 3 parachutes. President Trump immediately grabs one and says (With a donald trump voice)"I am the new President. I have a lot of great plans for my country. I need a parachute." He takes one and jumps. The pilot then quickly blurts out, "I am the captain of this plane. These are my parachutes. Im taking one." He takes one and jumps. This leaves only the little boy and the old man. The old man quickly says. "You better take the las parachute. Im old and have lived my life. You can still do great things with the time.." He is interrupted by the little boy who says. "You dont have to die! We can both go. President Trump Jumped out with my backpack!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doughnuts make u go nuts What kind of doughnuts do the KKK prefer? White powdered doughnuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A heart of gold. A local charity had never received a donation from the towns banker, so the director made a phone call. Our records show you make $500,000 a year, yet you havent given a penny to charity, the director began. Wouldnt you like to help the community? The banker replied, Did your research show that my mother is ill, with extremely expensive medical bills? Um, no, mumbled the director. Or that my brother is unemployed? Or that my sisters husband left, leaving her broke with four kids? I & I & I had no idea. So, said the banker, if I dont give them any money, why would I give any to you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a job at the strip club. "I help the girls get dressed and undressed." "Great gig. How much?" "Twenty dollars a day." "That''s not very much." "It''s all I can afford."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If 666 is the evil number Then 25.806975... is the root of all evil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about the cow that was able to step over the the electric fence? No one could believe it, it was an udder shock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The substitute teacher''s eyes were crossed She couldn''t control her pupils.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked why my stitches were unravelling but accidentally posted it to a gaming forum last night Turns out it was the wrong thread', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('two lovers were in the heat of passion when all of a sudden the sound of hard breaking and tire screeching was heard from outside They jump out of bed, she rushes to the bathroom to freshen up, he grabs his cloths and heads out the window. 5 minutes later there is a knock on the front door. She goes to open it while setting her dress. When she opens the door the guy she was just making love to was waiting outside. "Honey", says her husband. "We''re way too stressed out" edit: added "husband" for clarification', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Models Why did the models keep tripping on the runway? They were showing off the fall lineup. Badumtss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m getting tired of all the sexual comments about my skirt... "Slut" "You don''t leave a lot to fantasize about" "Why couldn''t you just have worn something under your skirt?" "Dude your balls are visible"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never buy flowers from a monk Only YOU can prevent florist friars', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know? One Direction''s "best song ever" is not actually best song ever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Hitler put his little armies? In his little Sleevies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today marks a very special landmark Whitney Houston has been clean for five years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad pick up line Me: spell me Her: M-E Me: you forgot the D Her: there is no D in me Me: not yet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two Australian math nerds having sex? A square root.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police officer pulls an elderly couple over. A police officer pulls an elderly couple over. The old man is driving. Officer: I pulled you over for speeding. Old man: I wasn''t speeding, you must have the wrong guy. Old lady: You were going 80 miles per hour, don''t lie to the good officer. Old man: Shut your goddamn mouth you old bitch! Officer: I also noticed that you aren''t wearing a seat belt. Old man: I was wearing a seat belt but took it off when you pulled me over. Old lady: You haven''t worn a seat belt in the 60 years I''ve known you. Stop lying to the good officer. Old man: Bitch, I told you to keep your damned mouth shut! Officer: Ma''am, does he always talk to you this way? Old lady: Only when he''s drunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked God "why did you make women so beautiful"? And He replied, "So you will love them" The man continued, "But why did you make them so stupid?" He replied, "So they will love you"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A zoophile, a sadist, a murderer, a necrophile, a pyromaniac and a masochist are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution, bored out of their minds. "Let''s about having sex with a cat?" says the zoophile. "Let''s have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist. "Let''s have sex with the cat, torture it, and then kill it," shouts the murderer. "Let''s have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then fuck it again," says the necrophile. "Let''s have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it, fuck it again and then burn it," says the pyromaniac. Silence took over, and then the masochist says: "Meow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlour and pulled himself slowly and painfully, up onto a stool.. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?" "No, he replied, "Arthritis."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a funk band composed of only plumbers? George Sinkton and the P-Trap All Stars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not addicted to sandpaper... I just need a little something to take the edge off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We read it wrong! Father Joseph had spent the last few months holed up in the Vatican library, trying to unlock the secrets of Christianity by reading all the old scrolls / books available. Day and night he toiled away in his self-administered solitary confinement. Months passed this way, till the Pope started worrying about him. He sent a young priest to check up on him. The priest made his way to the library, climbing down level after level, searching for the ever elusive Joseph. Finally, in the deepest level, he heard whimpers and cries. Concerned, he rushed into the room, and in the corner was Father Joseph, head between his hands, crying. "Father, are you alright? What happened?" inquired the priest. Joseph looked up, tears streaming down his cheek, and said "They said Celebrate...CELEBRATE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Apple Guy died? R.I.P. Isaac Newton', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In class one day, a teacher asks her young students what their dads do for a living NSFW "Sally, what does your daddy do?" "My daddy is a lawyer!" She says, proudly "Jane, what does your daddy do?" "My daddy is a doctor" She exclaims This go on until she gets to Frankie "Frankie, what does your daddy do for a living?" Frankie hangs his head and in a small, timid voice he says "My daddy works in a bar. He dances for other men. Sometimes, if the money is good, he''ll go into the back alley and have sex with them" The teacher is shocked. She gets the other students distracted doing other things and takes Frankie into a quiet corner. "Frankie! Why would you say something like that?!?" Frankie looks up at her and says "I''m sorry! He doesn''t! It''s just that he plays for the Leafs and I was too ashamed to say!!" (Insert any other hockey/sport team in the punchline)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys go to a ski lodge... Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren''t enough rooms so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job!" The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he''s had the same dream, too. Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, "That''s funny I dreamed I was skiing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was contemplating suicide on a bridge. A man was contemplating suicide on a bridge when he looked down and saw a little man with no arms dancing. This cheered him up and made him change his mind about suicide. When he got down off the bridge he approached the little man to thank him. "Thank you, I was going to jump off the bridge until I noticed you dancing. If you can find the good in life even with no arms, I can do the same" "Dancing?" Said the little man. "I wasn''t dancing, me arse is itchy and I can''t scratch it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists removed the right half brain of a man and asked him to count to ten. The man counted, "two, four, six, eight, ten." Then they put the right-half back and removed the left-half, and again asked the man to count to ten. The man counted, "one, three, five, seven, nine." The scientists then removed both halves of the man''s brain, and asked him again to count to ten. The man said, "look, we''re gonna count to ten. We''re gonna count. Because I know numbers, I have the best numbers. All the politicians in Washington can''t count to one-believe me, I''ve counted to one many, many times. They said we couldn''t count to ten. Well, I''m beating all of those people in the polls. We''re gonna count to ten. Everybody, count to ten. Okay? And let me tell you - let me tell you something. I will be the best counting President God has ever created. We are gonna count to so many tens, I tell you. Look at that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Valve had an NHL team... would that be the Mighty VAC''s?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Turns out there are TWO Loch Ness Monsters. One of them is quite mean, but the other actually gives away his forestry tools. A little weird, sure, but it''s always nice to see some random axe of Kind Ness.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what I like about midgets? Very Little.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I lost my watch at a party once... An hour later I saw some guy stepping on it while he was sexually harassing some woman at that party. Infuriated, I immediately went over, punched him and broke his nose. No one does that to a woman, not on my watch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Legolas so fit? He always eats elfy snacks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife doesn''t like vomit jokes. But I do nausea problem with it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people boil pasta in water? It is way too soggy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call huge dancing rocks? Technotonic plates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to my favorite bar last night. A Chinese guy sits down next to me. I ask him "hey, do you know karate or some other martial art"? He says "why, because I''m Asian"? I said "no, because you''re drinking my beer".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Indian man were waiting outside the delivery room. The matron comes out and explains that the hospital has accidentally mixed up the babies. The Scot goes straight in and picks up the brown baby. The Indian says "Are you sure that''s your baby?" The Scot says "No, but there''s no way I''m going to risk leaving here with an English baby."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the only acceptable thing for a Scotsman to wear under his kilt? Lipstick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kindergarten student told his teacher he''d found a cat... A kindergarten student told his teacher he''d found a cat, but it was dead. "How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her student. "Because I pissed in its ear and it didn''t move," answered the child innocently. "You did WHAT?!?!?!" the teacher yelled in shock. "You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went ''Pssst!'' and it didn''t move."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I came up with a science joke... Why are people with diamond shoes so bad for the environment? They have a big carbon footprint...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rule #1 for learning english Their our know rules!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did the chicken cross the road? "To get to the other side" Nope to get to the idiots house. "Oh" knock knock "who''s there?" The chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked her students... A teacher asked her 4th grade students a question every Thursday afternoon at the end of the day saying if they got it right they would not need to come to school Friday. The first week she asks "how many stars in the galaxy?" No students had the answer. The next week she asks"how many grains of sand are there on the beaches in Florida?" Nobody had an answer. The kids were getting frustrated, and little Billy told them "don''t worry, I have an idea." Billy came to school Thursday with 2 billiard balls that were painted black. As the teacher stands up to ask her question at the end of the day, Billy rolls the balls down towards the front of the room. The billiard balls crash against her desk and the students laugh. The teacher shouts "ok! Who is the comedian with the black balls!?" Billy jumps from his seat, strolls toward the door and says "Kevin Hart. See you on Monday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a Fleetwood Mac GPS for my car. It''s useless though. It just keeps telling me to go my own way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes hes lost. A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes hes lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, Excuse me, can you tell me where I am? The man below says: Yes. Youre in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field. You must work in Information Technology, says the balloonist. I do replies the man. How did you know? Well, says the balloonist, everything you have told me is technically correct, but Its of no use to anyone. The man below replies, You must work in management. I do, replies the balloonist, But howd you know?* Well, says the man, you dont know where you are or where youre going, but you expect me to be able to help. Youre in the same position you were before we met, but now its my fault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bear with no teeth A gummy bear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, a Frenchman, a ravishing blonde and a homely brunette... ...are sharing a compartment on a train as it winds its way through the Alps. Every now and then the train passes through a tunnel, during which time the compartment is plunged into complete darkness. On one such occasion, a ringing slap is heard and as the train passes back into daylight, the Frenchman is rubbing his sore, red cheek. The brunette thinks ''I bet that dirty Frenchman fondled the blonde and she struck the pervert.'' The blonde thinks ''I bet that filthy Frenchman was looking to grope me in the dark, mistook the dowdy brunette for me and she slapped the beast.'' The Frenchman thinks ''I bet that perfidious Englishman touched up the blonde in the dark and she slapped me by mistake.'' The Englishman thinks ''I can''t wait for another tunnel so I can slap that French twat again.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A profilactic check-up with the dermatologist at a coal mine. In comes a miner, the doctor tells him to undress and peel back the skin of his penis. "What''s that bubblegum doing there", asked the doctor. "Well, the mines are all sooty and dusty and that''s the only clean place down there." "What''s with the second piece of bubble gum next to it?" "Oh, that one''s Ahmed''s, he has nowhere to put it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the Coco Pops monkey was recently murdered? Tony the Tiger, Snap, Crackle and Pop all got killed too. Police think its the work of a serial killer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor once told me that it''s important to get 8 hours of beauty sleep per day But to be honest I think you need 9', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between sarcasm and lying? I don''t know, I''m just the president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: Dad, I have a question regarding sex with my underage girlfriend. Father: Yes? Son: Could you stop doing that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They should make birth control for men Because it makes more sense to fire blanks than shoot at a bulletproof vest. Recent discoveries will make this joke obsolete, thought I''d give it one more run.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say that counting sheep jumping over a fence makes you to to sleep. However, Donkeys are much more effective... You''re completely out as soon as your ass leaps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you''re attracted to people that look like you. That explains why I like women with big breasts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I invited the girl I''m dating over for dinner. While we were all sat at the table, there was complete silence. It made me feel very uncomfortable. I said, "Why does it feel like there''s an elephant in the room?" "Because there is," said my dad, looking at the girl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t have OCD... I know because I''ve checked 300 times', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish life was like a hairstyle So you could just cut it off and get a new one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Scotsman who works in a cloakroom? Angus McCoatup', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Matchmaker walks into a bar... They see 5 people in there, 2 pair of couples and a stag. One of the couple is a Gothic couple and a Nerdy Couple. The Matchmaker talks to the Gothic couple and says to the couple "You''re gonna laid tonight." The Gothic couple replies "How would you know that?" The Matchmakers states that its because they feel that are emotionally strong for each other. The Matchmaker then goes to the nerdy couple and says "You''re gonna get laid tonight." The nerdy couple ask "Why?" The Matchmaker says its because they are mentally strong for each other. Finally the Matchmaker goes to the stag and says "You''re gonna get laid tonight." The man replies "Really? How do you know?" The matchmaker replies "Because I am physically stronger than you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did God create vaginal mycose? So women too can know what it is to live with an irritated cunt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A women got a wooden breast implant yesterday.... it would be a funny joke if this had a punch line... Wooden tit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a farmer count his cows? With a COWculator... But, what if they all have babies? Then he MOOtiplies them! Man, I''m really milking these puns for more than they''re worth...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I first got my licence my mother always told me... "It''s not you I''m worried about, it''s the other guys." Which is wrong.... Guys aren''t the only problem. *pulls down visor mirror and applies eyeshadow, and lipstick while simultaneously posting to snapchat.*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My new personal trainer encouraged me to do do fifteen push-ups every commercial break on TV Man... I love Netflix!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apple likes to leave things out of their products. The phone I bough from them doesn''t have a headphone jack... and the car I bought from them doesn''t have windows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peanut butter was driving his toast when suddenly... ..there was a jam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What tastes good on pizza but not on pussy? Crust', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that female celebrity who was murdered? Me: Who was it? Dad: I think her first name was Reese Me: Witherspoon? Dad: No it was with a knife', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man named Rob got his identity stolen. I guess you could say he got... *robbed*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just got done doing squats and I gotta say... It''s a huge weight off my shoulders', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the goose say when he found out about flying south? Wanna hear migrate idea?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the midget clairvoyant who escaped from prison the other day? Police are looking for a small medium at large.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Set a fire for a man, And you''ll keep him warm for a night. Set a man on fire, and you keep him warm for the rest of his life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb Just one, unless it''s a black light.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('do androids dream of electric sheep? Not unless they''re Welsh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a lengthy debate, congress finally passed a law banning pedophiles from children''s shoe stores. It was No Minor Feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does a redditor drown? In the sea of reposts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Batman take with his alcohol? Just ice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a fish and he''ll eat for a day. Give a fish a man and he''ll eat for a year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Iraqi friend found a silver lining on the Muslim travel ban My Iraqi friend found a silver lining on the Muslim travel ban. He said "at least my mother-in-law can''t come and visit." Well, at least he found something to laugh about XD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Irish plumbers earn for overtime? Time an'' a Turd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irishman walks into a bar... Just kidding he was born there and never left', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My apologies. Two punjabi neighbours are arguing over whose fence is better. One says, "Your fence isn''t even waterproof. You didn''t picket correctly". The other slaps the first. Enraged the first shouts, "How dare you. What gave you the right to slap me." The second neighbour replies, "It''s not my right, it''s my state. It''s my Pun-job".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in a bar yesterday... when suddenly realised i needed to fart. The music was really loud, so i timed my farts with the beat of the music. After a couple of songs, i started to feel better. I finished my beer and noticed that many people were staring at me. I Then suddenly remembered i had been listening to my iPod', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is this the bus for dyslexic kids? Oops, wrong sub.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m gonna tell you an oxygen and potassium joke, OK?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks down the street wearing a pineapple on his head Another man noticing him and asks: "Umm, sir? Do you realize you have a pineapple on your head?" "Well... yeah", he says. -"But... why?" -"Dude! I wears pineapple on my head every Tuesday!" -"But... today is Wednesday..." The man quickly removes the pineapple from his head and yells: "Oh god, i feel so stupid!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the mortician cross the road? To get to the other suicide', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the robot kill someone with its empty battery? So it would get charged with murder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The English Teacher in India Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I". Student: I is the.... Teacher: Stop! Never put ''is'' after an "I". Always put ''am'' after an "I". Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Did The Orange Say To The Apple Are you really that stupid? Oranges can''t talk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with boobs? One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is your nose in the middle of your face? Because it is the scenter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna know how to brighten the day of everyone on Earth? A few dozen strategically placed warheads should do the trick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A poem. I am a little girl, I have a little thing That when I go to bed, I put my finger in. Now I''m much older, My thing had lost its charm And now it takes 5 fingers, And half my fucking arm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I bought a new chair today Guess you can say I''m SATisfied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What went through Hitler''s mind before he died? "If I wasn''t so distracted by taking over the world I could have killed so many more jews."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the Pope when he is sleepwalking? A Roamin'' Catholic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 drunk guys enter a taxi 3 drunk guys enter a taxi. The taxi driver knew that they were drunk, so he starts the engine and turns it off again. Then said, "we have reached your destination". The 1st guy gives him the money and the 2nd guy says "Thank you". The 3rd guy slaps the driver. The driver is shocked, thinking the 3rd drunkard knew what he did. But then he asks "what was that for?" The 3rd guy replies, " Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best method of transportation for Jews? A dustpan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you crossbreed a Chihuahua with a German Shepherd? A que-nein.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my husband there are 100 days until our baby''s delivery He said "That''s a really long time. You should really use Prime next time".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate German chefs They''re suck kochs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the sound of one hand clapping? Amputees anonymous', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pun competition One day, a man was sitting at home with a beer in hand when he read about a pun competition being held downtown. He got up early the next morning and came up with the best puns he had ever seen, and entered his 10 best puns hoping he would win, but unfortunately no pun in 10 did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Donald Trumps favorite kind of dog? a BORDER collie!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between ET and an illegal alien? ET learned English and wanted to go home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend has a lot of trust issues. Well, one of them does.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a man walks into a bar looking sad... The bartender asks the man what he wants. The man says, Oh, just a beer." The bartender asked the man, What''s wrong, why are you so down today? The man said, My wife and I got into a fight and she said she wouldn''t talk to me for a month. The bartender said, So what''s wrong with that? The man said, Well, the month is up tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Arab porn? XXXPlosive', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the japanese police catch the black man? because he nigeru', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A radio station in Ireland is taking calls to find a word that is commonly used but isn''t in the dictionary yet... The first caller gets through. "Hello! What word do you think should be in the dictionary?" "Goan!" "Goan? Can you use it in a sentence?" "Yeah, go''an fuck yerself!" The caller then begins laughing until the station can cut off his call. After several more calls they get another man, "And what''s your word sir?" "Smee!" "Can you use it in a sentence?" "Aye! S''mee again! Go''an fuck yerself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girls call me shortcut My penis is circumcised and 3 inches long', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does Phil Collins record his songs? In a stu-stu-studio.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cancer runs in my family. July was a very popular month to have babies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('February 10th should be National Fart Day. Because it''s 2/10.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the Difference between Marlin the Fish and Walter White? One''s finding Nemo the other one is funding Chemo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest has diarrhea Holy shit!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many freudians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to screw in the lightbulb and another to hold the peni... LADDER!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump uses a special steroid to stay ahead in the game. Orange juice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a teenage Hitler Zitler', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the first thing Eskimos teach their kids? Don''t eat yellow snow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My stomach hasn''t felt well all day, I''m like a bartender during an earthquake... I''m having trouble controlling my stools.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a girl sleeps with 100 guys she gets called a slut. What do you call a guy who does the same thing? A homosexual.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boyfriend suggesting For Prisma Girl Friend, i am not able to install prisma app in my mobile. Boyfriend: Check your phone storage is full. Girl Friend: Hhmm, is there any alternative of this app? Boy Friend: Yes, Take Selfie Without Make up', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My phone fell from the 20th floor, good thing it was in airplane mode.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When life gives you lemons... why do you use a bra?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Napping at work Sometimes, when I''m sure people can only see the back of my head, I enjoy sneaking in a quick catnap at work. They never last too long though, invariably someone rings the bell telling me they want to get off my bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two vampire bats were hanging arround Suddenlly the first one states: "I''m hungry, I''m going to grab a bite to eat" and he flies off. Half an hour later he returns with a huge smile on his face and blood on his chin. The other bat asks: "Did you get your fill?" "Oh boy did i ever. Do you see that red roofed barn way over there?" "Ahha" "Well beyond that barn there is a huge herde of cows... an all you can eat bufette" So the second bat gets excited and flies off. 45 minutes latter he returnes with a gloom expression and a face full of blood. "Do you see that big church tower over there?" He asks his friend. "Yeah, I see it" "Well I sure as hell didn''t"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A demolition expert goes on stage during open mic night... He proceeds to bring the house down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m sorry I said "nice phone" When you showed me a picture of your baby..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old timers were playing chess in the park. The first one says: "know what I did yesterday? I went to the girls..." "At your old age?" Says the second one as he cuts him off. "How was it?" He asks in anticipation "Much nicer than the boys" Edit: dunno if this translates well enough', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redhead walks into the Dr. Office..... She sits down on the examining table and tells the Doctor "I think I am going to die. I hurt all over. I touch my arm and it hurts, I my head and it hurts. I touch my abdomen and it hurts." The doctor looks at her and says, "Let me guess that you are naturally blonde." "Why yes, How did you guess?" "Because you have a broken finger."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded on an island... The island is 10 miles from shore and without any other possible way to leave, the woman decide swimming is the only way off. The redhead goes first, she manages to make it 3 miles before she gets tired and drowns. The brunette then goes after, she makes it farther than the redhead but still finds herself tired and drowns five miles away from shore. Finally, it''s the blonde''s turn. She makes it five miles before feeling and tired and swims back to the island.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you destroy a feminist in a debate? You ask "what rights do men have that women don''t?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell apart the voices in Donald Trump''s head from the voices in Steve Bannon''s? Trump''s voices mumble praise of himself, Bannon''s shriek racial epithets, and both are silent when Russia Telecom has an outage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We should make all vehicles be driven by Stormtroopers They never hit anything so there would be no accidents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend slept over last night and asked to use my shower this morning... "You can use any soap or shampoo that''s in the shower. I set a clean towel on the counter for you and pushed the stool under the sink so you won''t trip over it." She replied, "I''d prefer it if you flushed any stool down the toilet, but as long as I don''t trip on it I guess we''re okay."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Itching penis I went to a urologist because the head of my penis was itching. He told me I had an infection and that I should soak my penis in alcohol. The itching has stopped but now my Jack Daniels tastes funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t tell whether my new car''s suspension is amazing, or if I''m a sociopath Either way when I ran over that pedestrian I didn''t feel a thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Vegeta name his son Trunks? ...find out on the next episode of Dragon Ball Z', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Americans make the best jokes... Sorry I meant President.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have y''all heard of the cow that produces milk that taste like that stuff of myths? It''s legen-dairy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer''s and Cancer The cancer sucks, but at least I don''t have Alzheimer''s! Wait No I do I can feel the edges of my mind unraveling; each piece, once so firmly put together, slowly falling away from my grasp. To know that the mind, the seat of who you are, can simply... disintegrate, like a mighty sandcastle in the tide... Well, at least I don''t have cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do brides traditionally wear white? So they match the stove, the fridge and the dishwasher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s an amnesiac''s favorite cheese? Camembert', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[short] what is Forrest Gump''s password? 1forrest1', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ice Cream Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was told that the friendship between sodium, potassium, and oxygen was bad. I said, "Na. Pretty sure it is OK." EDIT: Should have switched potassium and oxygen around. Dang it...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t really like food from Spain much but... To chicharrn I guess', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows are standing in a field in Canada in the year 2003. One cow turns to the other and says, "we gotta watch out. I hear mad cow disease has been spreading through the herd." The other cow looks towards him and says, "what are telling me for? I''m not a cow, I''m a duck!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Organic chemistry is difficult Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I faked my death, but hardly anyone attended my funeral Apparently I faked it really badly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Snoop Dogg bust out an umbrella? Fo drizzle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Courtroom antics. Whats the best thing about being the smartest person in a courtroom? Knowing they''ll never find the bodies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between your penis and your tax return? She''ll blow your tax return', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The wife and I have recently been blessed with the pitter patter of tiny feet around our house. I hired a midget butler.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Hindi people fight with each other? Because they can''t have beef!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Wolverine''s favorite author? Lemony Snikt (I''m sorry...)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A chicken goes into the library. A chicken goes into the library, walks up to the librarian, and says, "Book." The librarian says, "You want a book?" "Book" "Any book?" "Book" So the librarian gives the chicken a novel and off it goes. An hour later, the chicken come back and says, "Book-book." The librarian says, "Now you want two books?" "Book-book." So she give a chicken two more novels. The chicken leaves but again comeback an hour later. "Book-book-book." "Three books?" "Book-book-book." So the librarian gives the chicken three books, but she decides she''ll follow the chicken and finds out what is going on? And the chicken crosses the road, goes down the alley, out of town and towards the woods, into the woods and down to the river, down to the swamp, and there is a bull frog. The chicken sets the books down by him. The bullfrog looks at the books and says, "Reddit...Reddit...Reddit..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Jewish man with heartburn? An acidic Jew.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you sitting on the F5 key? Because dat ass is so refreshing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rainn Wilson to star in the next Harry Potter spin off! Fantastic Beets And Where To Find Them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I only lie to people I don''t like. Don''t worry, I like you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Eminem only have one biological kid? He only had one shot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Click here to see a pun ctuation mark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Teacher asks the students.. "Is it possible to insert 2 holes through one hole?" Nobody is able to answer Teacher: "You guys are so stupid. Go and ask your parents and come back tomorrow with an answer." The next day too, nobody is able to answer the question. Teacher: "Well, it seems your parents are stupid as well. See the answer is so simple." Then the teacher makes a circle using his thumb and index finger and keeps it in front of his nostrils. Teacher: "See, it was so simple, yet nobody was able to answer." The next day, a student comes up to the teacher and says, "Sir, my father has asked if it''s possible to insert 7 holes through one hole?" Teacher: "No, that''s impossible." Students: "It is possible, my father said." Teacher : "How?" Student: "Take a flute and shove it up your ass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend didn''t get my RAM joke. DIMM wit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my violence like I like I beer... ... domestic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear is chasing a rabbit They make so much noise a genie pops up, "If you two stop making so much noise and let me go back to sleep I will grant you two wishes each" They agree and the beat goes first : "I want a big dick." /*Poof*/ Done The rabbit thinks about for a while and says: "I want a motorcycle." /*Poof*/Done Bear says: "I want all the bears in the world to be female and always in heat." /*Poof*/Done Rabbit gets on his motorcycle and points at the bear: "I want that bear to be gay." /*WROOOOM*/ Edit spelling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a pen, I have an apple, uh! iStylus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I only date black girls So I don''t have to meet their fathers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes an ISIS joke funny? The execution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I were happy for 25 years. Then we got married.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I redid my entire house with mirrors... You could say it really reflects who I am.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lying bunny? A haretic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you call a Medieval midi music? Midival! Ha! Get it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Load of animals in the back of a lorry.. The cow says "mooooooooove over" The chicken says "fkaaaf"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom and my girlfriend don''t get along. (NSFW?) My mom always blows me off. My girlfriend thinks she''s getting replaced.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sandwich walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender takes one look at him and says, "We don''t serve food here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to build a bridge for karma but I got over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you see the fight between the walnut and the pecan? It was nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is a bit like my dick... It''s long and hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know a youtuber name SoWTF... He is sooo what the fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Journey from $60k College Debt to $115k Net Worth & 816 Credit Score. And all thanks to this community! I started stand up and got beat up. Settlement has been a blessing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Bach have 20 children? His organ didn''t have any stops.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Dicks Nickname is Bing Because noone ever uses it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do electricians say while they meditate? *Ohmmmm...*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the inappropriate strip club patron say when he finally admits he has a problem? I come here too often', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel like most jokes about communism are pretty low effort But at least everyone gets them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Font Designer and a Police Officer Walk Into a Bar... The font designer leaves sans sheriff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do stoners make lousy poker players? Because they keep smoking the pot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you drown a hipster? Throw them into the mainstream.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Stevie Wonder see his friends? He is busy making good music.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A impoverished brother and sister are trying to come up with ways to make a few extra bucks. The sister says "I''m going down to give blood. I hear they''ll pay $20." "Wow," says brother, "I''m going to go donate sperm, I hear that pays $100." The sister angrily leaves the homeless shelter. The next day the brother seeing his sister leaving the homeless shelter he asks, "where are you headed to?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the full chromosome human go to war He was diploid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Chinaman in Paris picks up a girl and takes her to his hotel room. He opens the bedroom window and takes a deep breath. Then, they get into bed together and make love. After a while the Chinaman says, "Excuse me, I am a little tired." He gets out of the bed, goes over to the window, takes a deep breath. Then he rolls under the bed and comes out the other side. He jumps into bed and starts to make love again. After a while, he gets up saying, "Excuse me, I am a little tired." Again, he goes over to the window, and takes a deep breath, then he rolls under the bed and gets out the other side. He jumps back into bed and starts making love once more. When this has happened five times, the girl gets up saying, "Excuse me, I am a little tired, too." She goes over to the window, takes a deep breath of air, looks under the bed and finds four Chinamen there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get gum out of your hair? Cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do cousins come from? Aunt holes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I call my wife Bambi too..... Because I don''t want her shot. Just her mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ate at a Vietnamese restaurant but I used a fork. I guess you could say I made a pho-pas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friend 1: Oi mate can I borrow your phone? Friend 2: Yeah sure, why''d you need it for? F1: Well mines busted and I just wanna call me mum. F2: Oh no problem mate here ya go, just hit redial.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man from Wisconsin is travelling in Mexico... when he comes across a dairy farm. "Buenos noches, do you have any cheeze for sale?" "Buenos, nochez"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am a legal resident of the United States and I have not paid my taxes for the last 15 years. AMA! Thank you for your time. Ask me anything. **EDIT:** Just a moment guys, someone is at my door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old woman walked into a sex toy shop... She wandered in the shop for a couple of minutes and finally she stopped and asked the vendor: How much is this one? He replied: Ma''am, that''s a fire extinguisher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and slides down Nelson''s Column? Winnie Mandela', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Trump stage a photo op of him winning a marathon against a bunch of traffic signs? To show that he was leading the poles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Whos there? Smell mop. (finish this joke in your head)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so ugly that when... ... I passed out at a frat party I woke up with more clothes on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a jacket and he''ll stay warm all winter Teach a man to jacket and he''ll stay warm his whole life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Timing You know the most important part of telling a joke?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy asks his dad what the difference between a fanny and a cunt is Thinking he''s old enough to learn, he tells the boy ''i''ll show you! '' He takes his son upstairs where his wife is sleeping in bed. He lifts the sheets and points to his wife''s vagina and says '' you see that? That''s a fanny'' ''Oooh can i touch it?'' Asks the kid. ''No!! You''ll wake up the cunt! ''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer is milking his cow This is a translation of a Galician joke, feel free to correct any mistake/awkward phrasing A farmer is milking his cow, the cow whips him with her tail. -Fuckin'' cow! The farmer keeps milking the cow, and the cow keeps whipping him. At the third whip, the farmer is really pissed with the cow, so he gets a stool, takes his belt off and ties the cow tail to the ceiling -Not so smart now, aren''t you? His pants fall to the floor, and in that exact moment, his wife enters the cowhouse. +Manolo! What the hell! -Look, if I tell you the truth you would not believe me anyway, so yea, I''m going to fuck this cow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what happens when you take a joke too far? The 45th president of the United States', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While examining me, my dentist asked me if i had recently performed oral sex Embarassed, i asked if i had a pube in my teeth. He said no..there''s shit on your nose', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Parental settings for my virgin wifi? Where are the parental settings for my virgin wifi?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a fish and he''ll eat for a day. Give a man a poisoned fish, and he''ll eat for a lifetime.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve made this new photo app and it''s a thousand times better than Instagram. It''s called Instakilo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian submarine A Russian submarine was sailing,and the captain felt a huge shake.Confused,he ran to Vladimir and asked him: "What was that,was it an earthquake or we hit something?",Vladimir said: "No Captain,Ivan''s girlfriend ran with her lover to Venice", the captain even more confused says:Yeah,but what''s the matter with that and the shake?Vladimir said:Well,there is no more Venice...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Valentine''s Day Gift A young lady was caught napping one afternoon on Valentine''s Day. She woke up when she heard the doorbell. "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine''s day," she said to her boyfriend. "What do you think it means?" "You''ll know for sure tonight," he replied. That evening, the young man arrived with a small package and gave it to his girlfriend. Delighted, she opened it and found a book entitled "The meaning of dreams."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend said to me the other day, "Why did God give women periods with cramp pains, and men nothing?" I laughed and replied, "Don''t be silly, he gave us women."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Went to Disneyland because my daughter is so obsessed with Mickey Mouse. She was so excited when I got home and told her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Donald Trump use when his fax machine is broken? His alternative fax.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently this was one of the jokes from East Germany before the fall of the Berlin Wall. A citizen orders a Trabant car. The salesman tells him to come back to pick it up in nine years. The customer asks: "Shall I come back in the morning or in the evening then?" "You''re joking, aren''t you?" "No, not at all. It''s just that I need to know whether the plumber can come at 3pm or not." (Credit to anonymous)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an actor that gets employed by trump? Alec Baldwin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think morning sex was the greatest thing ever... Until I started to share a cell with Bubba.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not that the Massacre at Bowling Green didn''t happen... It was just an alternative event.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why has there never been a coup d`tat in america? Because there is no US-embassy in america. (from german tv-satire "Die Anstalt")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the composer find his buddy on social media? He checked his franz liszt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What organization is the best at curve fitting? INTERPOL', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donkey In A Bar This man walks into a bar and sees a donkey. He askes the bartender why is there a donkey in here the bartender says if you can make this donkey laugh I will give you ten thousand dollars. So the man whispers in the donkey''s ear and the donkey started laughing. Then the bartender said if you can make the donkey cry I will give you ten thousand more dollars. So the man turns to an angle where only the donkey can see and the donkey started crying. The bartender couldn''t believe it so he asked the man how did you make the donkey laugh then make the donkey cry? He said first I told the donkey my dick was bigger than his, than I showed him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do astronauts use to cook in space?? Marzipans!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Strange Redneck Nick Name The redneck family down the street always called one of their boys Ant Eater and I could never figure out why. So one day they had a party and I was invited, so I stopped by and finally asked, "Where did Ant Eater get that nick name". With out a pause Ant Eaters brother said "Oh because he slept with our Aunt, and apparently he was good with his tongue. So we call him Aunt Eater!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Come forth and I shall grant you eternal life, said God unto John. But John came in fifth and won a toaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a Muslim parent with an honor roll student! My kid is the bomb', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cockroach break up with his mosquito girlfriend? He saw her sucking someone else.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shall I compare thee to a summer''s day? ''Cause girl you hot as fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son asks for money A young jewish son asks his dad for $5 dollars. The dad responds shocked, "$4 dollars? What do you need $3 dollars for?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump''s cabinet is so dumb that I can get a better one at IKEA.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Could you imagine if someone pulled off Trump''s hair piece? There would be hell toupee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Words can''t express how beautiful you are. But numbers can. 4/10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Germans least favourite drink? Juice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters Two hunters are walking through the woods and having a great time. When all of the sudden one falls to the ground, eyes roll back in their head, and it not breathing. So the other friend calls 911, "Help my friend just died and I do not know what to do!?" The 911 operator says, "Well are you sure he is dead? Can you make sure he is dead?" The operator hears the phone being placed on the ground, and a shot go off. The operator hears the phone being picked back up and the hunter says "Well now what!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why isn''t Barbie pregnant? Because Ken came in a different box', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jim apple Had a very rough time introducing himself in France', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bodybuilder told me he hates protein. No whey!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what pisses me off most about Reddit? [deleted]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pet rock died 1 upvote = 1 pray', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Sean Spicer''s favorite genre of music? Alternative Rock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can I make a wish? Two Men were out fishing when one decides to have a smoke He asks the other guy if he has a lighter He replies "Yes I do!" and hands the other a 10 inch long BIC lighter Surprised the guy asks "Where did you get this?" The guy replies "Oh I have a personal genie." The first man asks "Can I make a wish? " Sure says the other man "Just make sure that you speak clearly cause he is a little hard at hearing" "Ok I will" says the other as he rubs the lamp a genie appears and asks the man what he wants The man says " I want a Million Bucks " The genie says OK and goes back to his bottle and 10 seconds later a million ducks fly over head And the guy says to the other " Your genie realy sucks at hearing doesnt he?" The other man replies "I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trust not the Alien... It almost killed Sigourney Weaver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Christians have the Daily Bread, what do Buddhists have? The Daily Lama', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Get Stoned Before an Auction Even if you don''t win anything, you''ll still be the highest bidder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy gets arrested for taking a dump. -Knock knock -Who''s there? -Police. -Can you wait a little? I''m taking a dump right now. -We know, this phone booth is transparent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if your roommate is gay? His dick tastes like shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t Beethoven find his teacher? Because he was Haydn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife''s an Archaeologist because... She keeps on digging up the past!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi and a priest A rabbi Asked a priest: >Could you ever be promoted in your church? The priest answered, >Well, I could become a bishop The Rabbi asked, >And then? The preist said, >Well, I suppose I could even be an archbishop The rabbi said, >And if you were to be promoted again? The priest answered, >Well, then I would be a cardinal The rabbi inquired once again, to which the priest answered, >I could become the Pope The rabbi asked, >And then? The priest threw up his hands and said, >what more could I become? God himself?! The rabbi calmly replied, >One of our boys made it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did I say to -1? Look Ma! Not real.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I invented the perfect beach accessory for men! A clip-on-tip that attaches to the inside of your suit and peeks out just below the bottom of a guy''s swim trunks. We''re calling it the Billadong.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nice, calm and respectable lady went into..... A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a Frenchman say who lost his dinner whilst trying to find some more? Where did you come from? Where did you go? Where did you come from escargot?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What the difference between a gay guy and a refrigerator. When you put meat in the refrigerator it doesn''t get aids', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So i read this story about a woman who got electrocuted when she dropped her vibrator in the bath It was a total buzzkill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scottish bloke goes on a skiing holiday to Canada This Scottish bloke goes on a skiing holiday to Canada. After a hard day on the slopes he retires to a bar at the bottom of the mountain. After about five or six whiskeys, he looks up and notices a stuffed animal with antlers on the wall. He asks the barman, "What the fuck is that?". The barman says, "It''s a Moose." The Scottish chap says, "Fuck me! How big are the cats?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest.... A priest, an Irishman, a horse, a gorilla, a twelve inch pianist and an infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The bartender says "Is this some kind of a joke?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cockroach break up with his centipede girlfriend? Each time he spreads a couple of her legs she says: It''s not here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens if you don''t pay your exorcist? You get repossessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Bane''s favorite movie? Broke-back Mountain', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a person who is not a nihilist? A De-nihilist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when you take a joke too far? The 45th President of the United States.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor told me I was eating too much meat So I decided to quit cold turkey', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Soviet Russia, a Judge bursts into his chambers laughing *"I''ve just heard the funniest joke about Stalin... ever!"* *"Well, go ahead and tell us."*, the other Judges ask. *"I can''t. I just gave someone a life sentence for it."*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ann and Joe are having an argument "You are like Satan!" screamed Joe. "Their Mom says, "Shh, Joe thats offending." Once Ann left, she said, "Offending to Satan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbit is walking on the railways He is singing: My life is amazing, dumdumdum, my life is long, dum dumdum, dumdumdum dumdumdum dumdumdum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do with dead scientists? Barium', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the pony say anything? Because he was a little hoarse...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Spilt milk I hate how every time I come home and go to the kitchen my flat mate has spilled milk everywhere. How dairy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the over-sized transgender postcard say to the UPS driver? What don''t you understand? I told you, I don''t fit in a male box!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay dinosaur? A megasoreass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reading the news today. Man: A policeman accidentally inserted his truncheon in someone''s umm, ahh, mm. Other Man: Rectum? Man: Damn near killed ''em', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are only two people I know who can kill 70+ people in 2 hours. John wick... and John Wick 2', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you wrap hamsters in duct tape? So they don''t blow up when you fuck ''em.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun is walking down the street... A nun is walking down the street. As she passes a dark alley a man grabs her, pulls her into the alley, rips off her clothes, and ravages her in the most obscene manner possible. As the man is zipping up the nun wails, "Oh No! How am I going to tell Mother Superior I have been sexually violated twice!" The man says, "What do you mean? I only did it once." The nun leans back and says, "Yeah, but you''re going to do it again, aren''t you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make an idiot wonder? [deleted]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence. As he jumped down he sneered at me and I thought, well thats a little condescending.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a situation where a train wreck is happening right in front of your eyes and you can''t do anything about it? Donald Trump', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I identify as all real numbers. Call me by my new pronoun: xeR', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dorothy: Toto, we''re not in Kansas anymore Toto: I know, I miss the rains down in africa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the caveman say when he stumbled upon a pooping dinosaur? "That''s pooposterous!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is The ISIS Cafeteria called? Allahu Snakbar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Yugoslavian jew moves to israel After ww2 most of the (still alive) yugoslavian jews moved to Israel. Shlomo shekelowitz decides to stay in yugoslavia just to test the new socialist regime. After a year he moves to israel. One of his old friends sees him and asks SCHLOMO! Long time we did not see each other ! How is it in Yugoslavia ? Schlomo responds : "I couldn''t complain". His friend responds : "Why did you move here then ?" "I couldn''t complain", Schlomo repeats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my dad to embrace his mistakes. He cried. Then he hugged my sister and me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife got diagnosed with Alzeihmers and Parkinsons last week. I''ve been getting 8 wanks a day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the farmer say after he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor? (I am so sorry).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady goes into a pharmacy and asks for cyanide... A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Bob Ross exorcise his paint brush? He beats the devil out of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and my friends had an argument.... [NSFW] Me and my friends had an argument about what was more fucked up, one of my friends said necrophilia, the other said bestiality. I would''ve said both... But I didn''t want to beat a dead horse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pun contest... A man''s newsletter tells him about a pun contest they are holding. The person who submits the best pun will win $10000. The man thinks, *I could really use that money!* So he decides he will submit some puns. In the hopes of winning the $10000, he submits 10 puns in one letter. He hoped and prayed that at least one pun would win it for him. But no pun in ten did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People are saying that 3.5 years to build the wall is too long, but I''m not worried Government-funded construction projects almost never run over their time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a BMW and a cactus? George Zimmerman has never shot a cactus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the chimpanzee say to the human? No homo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who do you call when you get robbed in Mexico? 9-Juan-Juan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three kids walk into a Pole He was very fat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you always put your left shoe on last? Because when you put one shoe on, the other one is left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Alabaman wife say to her husband when she found out he was cheating? Oh, brother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two thieves break into a man''s house... The man wakes up in the middle of a night and runs down stairs but the thieves escape over the fence so he calls the police. The police get to his house and ask what happened; the mans says: "Well the robbers took off with my personal computer and nothing else before I scared them away", the police officer says "Did you get a look at them? Can you give us a description?" the man says "Well it was dark and I was only half-awake... but if I had to guess, I''d say they looked looked like the kind of people that would download child porn".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between Jared Fogel and a pixie stick? it''s OK for a kid to have a pixie stick in their mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two prostitutes are hanging out on a corner in the 70''s when one asks the other, "Hey, have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?" The other says "No, but I''ve been swung around by the tits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does uranium have in common with a mental ward patient? They''re both unstable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst part about a blizzard in a leper colony? Stepping outside in the morning to find a foot on the roof of your car', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seagull with diarrheia Seagull With Diarrhea told another that it barely Made It To Crowded Beach In Time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I asked a sheep how it is to be a sheep. "Meh..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I know the Mexicans probably think the wall will be too expensive... But they''ll get over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and her child were hugging ... "Mommy," says the child, "am I adopted?" "No, sweetie," replied the mother. "We haven''t managed to find someone who will take you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are walking along, two of them walk into a bar... The third one ducks. I''m sorry. I''m sure many have heard it before. But I haven''t seen it here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mushroom walks into a bar.... Bartender says "sorry sir we don''t serve your kind" mushroom says "why.... I''m a fungi"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump was once asked if he could quote any Bible verses. "Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Deport him and you will never have to feed him again." Donald 20:17', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino. Fuck if I know', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BREAKING: White House staffer leaks that the President was surprised to learn that Checks and Balances didn''t refer just to... bank accounts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats 18 inches long and dangles in front of an asshole? Donald Trumps tie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Moses make his coffee? *hebrews* it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the necrophiliac get a divorce? The rotten bitch split on him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dogs don''t love you... They''re just glad they dont live in China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 15999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('18:- can I buy a bottle of wine? Government :- No, that''s illegal and irresponsible. 18:- Can I go $40,000 into debt for education?? Government :- we encourage it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Nazis like dentists? Because they prefer whites', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the Buddhist order from the hot dog stand? Make me one with everything :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad always lived by the motto "Work hard, play hard." Mom made him seek help for his Viagra addiction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus is setting up for supper and he calls Judas over to help. "Judas, please set the table. " Judas complies and sets the table. "Judas, put the food on the table." Judas places the food on the table. "Judas, please call everyone to the table. " Again, he does as he is told and gathers everyone. As they are enjoying the feast Jesus planned and had Judas serve, Jesus gets really serious and says," This will be my last supper with you." He pauses and continues, " One of you will betray me." At which point Judas throws his hands up in a huff," Why do I have to do everything around here?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is Mexico going to be able to pay for the wall? It''s expensive, but I''m sure they''ll get over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Donald Trump and 5 year old? Honestly, somebody tell me because I have no fucking clue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do new iPhones and Donald Trump have in common? Both cost more than they''re worth and create the illusion of superiority without ever delivering.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s red and bad for your teeth? A brick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the muslim in America say ? [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the D.J. say to the Vegetable Farmer? Lettuce turnip the beet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what they say about jokes The cheesier the grater!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boss told me, "You are the worst train driver ever. How many have you derailed this year?" I replied, "I don''t know; it''s hard to keep track".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the musician who named his daughter Sharp? He didn''t have the heart to tell her she was accidental.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a chicken with a centipede? Extra drumsticks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did no one go to work in Mongolian Persia? Because they were always Ilkhanate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a pirate''s favorite letter? It''s the C matey!!!!! Idk I''m high', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men walks into a bar. The fourth man ducks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to know how to keep your guitar sounding good? Stay tuned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please dont tell jokes about domestic abuse... They hit too close to home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to a doctor. Doctor : I don''t know how to tell you this, but you have got to stop masturbating. Patient : But why? Doctor : So that I can fucking examine you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s super marios favorite type of fabric? Denim denim denim.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman are turning into good drivers ...so if ur a good driver watch out for women turning!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Surround yourself with people who have issues. People with issues always have alcohol.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the Zoo the other day and there was a loaf of Hovis in the Lion enclosure - so I went up to the zookeeper and said "What''s that doing in there?" and he said "That? That''s bread in captivity"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can Napoleon return to his place of birth? Of Corsican.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that 80% of Korean businessmen have caddaracts? The other 20% drive Mercedes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... And a table...and a chair...and the waiter...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Princess Diana was on the radio the night she died? She was on the radio, and the dashboard, and the hood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love to Poop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Bowling Green Massacre? No? Neither did the victims.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 nuns are sitting on a bench. A man in a trench coat walks by and flashes them. 2 of the nuns had a stroke. The third couldn''t reach.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every year, millions of people get sick from eating tainted beef. Who the hell is putting their taint on the beef?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cowboy orphan cat limp into the bar? He was looking for the man who shot his paw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I call my wife Bambi She thinks it''s because she''s cute with big brown eyes. But it''s really because I want someone to shoot her mother with a hunting rifle. **Edit:** Some people have accused me of "being a plagiarist" and "stealing other''s jokes"... Their words, not mine... *Pause for comedic value* But seriously, this **is** a version of an Ashlee Barnhill joke. Sorry for the bamboozle fellow redditors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Grizzly has attacked a school! Four are dead! Fortunately, the rest of the salmon are OK and are peacefully continuing upstream.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2018 kids won''t get this Club penguin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man attempts a bar hop... ...and squashes his nuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a sneezing nut sound like? *Ca-shew.*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2017 First UFO lands Alien: "Take me to your leader." *Alien is brought to Pres. Trump. Alien: "Good one! Seriously though. This is important."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nazi spy goes to a bar with a friend "Bartender, I vant two martinis, please." "Dry?" "Zwei, du amerikanisches Schwein!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A plane crashed on the border of two countries, and everyone dies except the pilot. Where you do you bury the survivors? Six feet under a cesspit, till you can no longer hear his screams.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey girl, are you today''s date? Because you''re 2/10.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Iron Man at a dance club Tony Stark is in an electronic dance club, he''s very upset that the D.J is playing subpar music and that the bar is closed. All of this makes Iron Man- Stark raving mad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I met two hipsters today Turns out, the correct term is conjoined twins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t stop shitting out feathers. I think I''ve got Irritable owl syndrome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Since Valentine''s is approaching, my friend posted "I love my girlfriend <3" I knew he liked them young but that is fucking ridiculous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a treadmill the other day... It''s really giving me a run for my money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was really unsuccessful and unpopular until I stood on a globe covered in super glue. Now I have the world at my feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Steve Bannon in a rubber room? Home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a jewish girls number? You roll up her sleeve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do people smoke in concentration camps? MariJEWana', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most common job among spiders? Web designer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Loyalty is very important for my wife... My girlfriend doesn''t care. Funny how different sisters can be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when there is a death at a funeral? A rehearsal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hermaphrodite... A woman gives birth to a baby. Shortly afterward, the doctor comes into the room looking grim faced. The woman sees this and panics. "Doctor, is my baby ok?" "Yes", the doctor replies. "But, Mrs. Johnson, I must tell you that your baby was born an hermaphrodite." "A... hermaphro-whaaat???" "An hermaphrodite, Mrs. Johnson. Essentially, your baby was born with the same body parts pertaining to both a male AND a female." The woman thinks about this. "So... let me get this straight, doctor. You''re telling me that my baby was born with both a penis AND a brain???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New Yorker went for a checkup.. Doctor: We''re sorry, you have Hepatitis B. New Yorker: Damn B, what kind of hepatitis?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I came up with a ''Knock Knock'' joke "Knock Knock" "Who''s there?" "I''ll ask" "I''ll ask who?" "Al- ask- a ... It''s so cold!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I applied for a job at a blacksmiths He asked if ive ever shoed a horse before. I said no but i once told a donkey to fuck off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tattooed people ride in a car, who is driving? The police', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would Freud say comes between fear and sex? Funf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pessimistic Mexican doing math? Negative Juan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Surprise bj I woke up to a surprise blowjob today. I should really start sleeping with my mouth closed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The captain of the Titantic was a vegetarian, his last words were... "Iceberg lettuce leaf"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cuddle with only one person? A cddle, because u weren''t there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his collection except for one. He''s never gonna give you Up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a rapper say after he''s done recording? It''s a rap', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doctor told me to drink a lot of clear liquid So I picked up some vodka and gin on the way home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mammoth walks down the street. All of a sudden a dozen of elephants get out of the corner, see Mammoth, come by and beat the shit out of him. After they left Mammoth stands up, spits broken tusks and says: "Fucking skinheads!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar The first orders a pint. The second orders half a pint. The third orders a quarter pint. The barman says "Fuck you guys" and pours two pints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Nazi walks into a Bar... ... Mitzvah', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of boxer spits on their opponents face? A beat boxer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang a picture.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a clown in prison? A sillycon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Angela Merkel visits Greece Angela Merkel visits Greece. On her way through customs she gets stopped by an officer ''Nationality?'' He asks ''German'' she replies ''Occupation?'' ''No, just visiting''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some guy assaulted me last night with a bat ... I was really impressed with how well he had trained it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An exhibitionist cross path with a 6 yo girl on her way to school. He asks the little girl "Hey, honey, do you know what a phallus is ?" "No mister, I''ve never heard of it" He then gets his raincoat wide open, revealing the erected object and starting to laugh frantically "It''s this ! hahahahaha" To which the child answers "Oh I see, it''s like a dick, but smaller."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the animals left the ark, Noah told them to go forth and multiply. After some while, Noah happened upon two snakes sunning themselves. "Why aren''t you multiplying?" Noah asked. The snakes replied, "We can''t, we''re adders." So Noah and his sons went into the nearby forest and felled some trees. They made a platform of logs onto which they placed the snakes. You see, even adders can multiply on a log table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can he simplify this trigonometric equation? Cos he can''t! Get it? It''s like cosecant. Hahahaha I made this joke in algebra 2 in high school and the class laughed for like 10 minutes straight. I believe it was the best pun of my entire life. 2 years later when I was a senior people still brought up the joke when these trigonometric identities came up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('German girl number One day I asked a sex German girl for her number and she said "SEX SEX SEX. DRY SEX SWINE!" I cowered away in fear Then her friend came up to me and said "She means ''666-3629"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Drunk in taxi A drunk gets into the back of a cab and the driver starts heading down the street. The drunk asks the cabbie, "hey Mac- do you have room up front for a six pack of beer and a pepperoni pizza?" The driver says "sure." The drunk goes "BLLLECCCCHHHHH." (It works much better verbally.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do they call the Hunger Games in France? Battle Royale with Cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a biker gang of bisexual Norse monarchs? The Bikings.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a woman gets a vibrator, It''s seen as a bit of naughty fun. But when a guy orders a 240 volt fuckmaster pro 5000 blow up latex doll, with a 6 speed pulsating pussy, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system. He''s called a pervert!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the guy who proposed to marry his car? He wanted a more engaging driver experience.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you fuse Arab and Indian food? Explosive Diarrhea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My maths teacher just told us a mean joke... I thought he was a coMedian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Funny that when a guy sleeps with tons of girls, he''s a stud.. But when a girl sleeps with tons of guys, somehow Im not one of them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t remember the translation of German "wichtig." I have a feeling it''s important, though.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Steve Bannon so drunk... his liver spots got liver spots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once an emotionally unstable suicide bomber he fell to pieces.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the guys at /incels use for birth control? Their personalities. One hundred percent effective.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stores in Seattle now accept credit cards in canabis stores It''s been a week for green cards in Washington', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife started with this weight loss program... A few months into the program she says to me "It''s been a couple of months and I still look fat. Can you give me a compliment?" I couldn''t really think of anything because she hates when I compliment her on her personality so I said "You have perfect eyesight dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Toothpaste Salesman So a toothpaste company offered a promotion to the salesman who could sell the most toothpaste in one week. After one week they all came back and the boss asked how they did. The first said he sold 100 by going door to door and telling people about the toothpaste, the boss says wow that''s good. The second said he sold 1000 by standing in front of grocery stories and tell people how important toothpaste is, and the boss says wow that''s amazing. The third said I sold 50,000 and the boss asked how that is possible, the salesman then says he went to the local [insert local professional sports arena] NFL game and set up a sign that says FREE CHIPS AND DIP, and when the people tasted the dip they said "wow that dip taste like shit" and the salesman responded by saying "it is, would you like to buy a toothbrush?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American walks into a cheesemaker''s shop in Italy. The cheesemaker greets him with an enthusiastic smile, "*Ciao!* How-a may I help-a you-a?" The American asks, "Do you have any Gouda cheese?" The cheesemaker scowls and turns red in the face, then gesticulates around the room and yells, "It''s-a all-a good-a cheese!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wonder if.. What if the ocean is salty because the land never waves back?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend was giving me my first pedicure I asked her if the tool she was using to rub my feet was called a pedofile.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus fed 2000 Jews fish and bread Hitler made 5 million Jews toast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If waitresses with big boobs work at Hooters, then where do 1 legged waitresses work? IHOP Gives tipping your waitress new meaning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After yoga class, I followed my instructor home and broke into her bedroom window. She screamed and told me I need to leave. I told her "Nah, I''ma stay".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got jailed when I performed a magic trick. Apparently, when I make the kids disappear, I also have to make them reappear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "What do you want?" The horse unable to understand English shits itself and runs out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The past, present and future walked into a bar. And it was tense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest? People care if the vest gets triggered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy asks a girl to prom... She says yes, In preparation, the guy goes to rent a nice suit. He waits in line for a very long time but eventually he gets it. He decides he wants to be a little fancy and so he goes to rent a limo. There''s a large line at the dealer. He waits in line for a very long time but eventually he rents the limo. On the day of the prom, he gets in the limo and begins to drive to the house of his date. There''s a lot of traffic so he waits in line for a very long time but eventually he gets there. He picks up his date and gets to prom without a problem. They dance, have fun etc. Eventually the girl gets thirsty and she asks the guy to go get some drinks. He walks to the punch table and there''s no punch line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Bruno Mars married Venus Williams on Earth, do you think they''d have a Sun? Only if they planet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Adele cross the road? To say Hello from the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend wanted to act out a scene from Fifty Shades of Grey It was the scene where Christian wanted to buy Anastasia a new Audi...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried out for the suicide club But I just couldn''t hang with them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: I hate fucking laundry Dad: Well stop fucking it and fold it already.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Masturbation When I was a teenager my father told me "If you keep doing that you''ll go blind". I said "Can''t I just do it until I need glasses?" Proof: Glasses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man, those UC students after MILO... Must have been Burn-e supporters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 3 types of republicans.. There are 3 camps of GOP supporters: #1 The McCain camp or Republicans #2 The McConnell camp or Republican''ts #3 The Trump Camp or Republicunts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Trump Travel ban was refused due to lack of evidence.. Apparently "I know it, you know it, everybody knows it" wasn''t enough', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it ridiculously easy to overcome the walls of Jerusalem? Because it''s covered in holiness.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blind man fall into the well? Because he couldn''t see that well.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have never gone to bed with an ugly woman, but I have waken up next to some many of them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandpa''s toothbrush Grandpa: I need a new toothbrush becuase one hair of it broke Shopkeeper: why do you want to buy a whole new brush when only one rush hair is broke? Grandpa: It was the only hair left', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde climb the roof of the pub? The drinks were on the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear an overused joke about necrophilia and bestiality? You''re just fucking a dead horse... (Sorry if this is a repost, I heard this at school)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What two types of people don''t care about age, Abortion clinics and necrophiliacs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a mathematician''s favorite thing to find in the woods? A log.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of Bees give the Most Milk? Boo Bees', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To gay guys first aid means Losing your virginity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a poultry farmer and a hooker have in common? They both raise cocks for a living.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wasn''t originally going to get a brain transplant... But then I changed my mind', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Terrorists favourite category to watch on YouTube? Trending. Because all the videos there blow up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pacifism is a martial art. Its moves are designed to bruise the opponent''s knuckles with your face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary had a little lamb The doctor fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my friends like my chromosomes Not enough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cheese say to the other cheese after a game of tennis? That was a "Gouda" Game!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are walking in a park, the brunette says awwww look a dead bird poor thing. The blonde looks up and says where?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Nazi goes to a bar... A Nazi goes to a bar, looks around, and sees an Orthodox Jew sitting at a nearby table. "Barkeep!", he says, "A round on me for everyone but that gentleman right there." Everyone in the bar receives a cocktail, he looks over at the Jew and notices him smiling back. The Nazi is not amused, goes back to the bar "Barkeep! I want to order a second round for everyone but him, and this time make it all top shelf". Nazi looks again at the Jew, sees him STILL smiling back. "Is that Jew an idiot or what?" Bartender responds: "Oh no my friend, that''s the owner."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay midget with great timing? A Metro-Gnome', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was a kid I asked my mum what a couple was... She said: ''Oh, two or three''. Now, she wonders why her marriage didn''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a copy of Mission Impossible 3 among my blu-rays the other day... I thought to myself: ''It''s not really impossible if he''s already done it twice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dinner A husband and a wife sit at the table, having dinner. The woman drops a bit of tomato sauce on her white top. "Och, I look like a pig!" The man nods, "And you dropped tomato sauce on your top!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asks her student a question... "if there''s two birds on a power line and somebody shoots one of them, how many birds are left?" " Zero" the boy said "the others would have flown away" "Actually the correct answer is two" said the teacher "but I like where your heads at." The boy came back to school next day and asked the teacher a question. "If there''s three women sitting on a bench eating ice cream and one is licking their ice cream, one is chomping on theirs and the other is sucking on theirs, which one is married?" The teacher answered "the woman sucking her ice cream." The boy replied "actually it''s the one with the wedding ring but I like where your heads at."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stevie Wonder got a cheese grater for Christmas He said it was the most violent book he''d ever read', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bored Proctologist A Proctologist who got tired of his profession decided to follow his lifelong dream and become a mechanic. After 2 years of school, he took a final exam where he passed with 150 percent. Confused, the Ex Proctologist asked how that was possible. The teacher replied that he received 50 points for correctly disassembling the motor, 50 points for correctly reassembling the motor, and 50 points for doing everything through the exhaust pipe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy caught a priest masterbating... "What are you doing?" asked the boy. I''m Masterbating. You''ll be doing is soon enough." explained the priest. "Why?" asked the boy. "Because my wrist is god damn exhausted!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dentist gives me cavity searches all the time. I think I need a new dentist..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m participating in a marathon this year. I''m the guy that pours cups of water for the runners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Donald Trump say after getting catfished? **FAKE NUDES!**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I gave my cows ecstasy thinking they''ll make more milk But the steaks were high.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the guitar teacher get arrested? Because he was an arsonist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knew this girl that tried to trade sex for adderall. What an attention whore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys were sitting in a bar talking. One was a Doctor, one was a Lawyer, and one was a Biker. After a sip of his martini, the doctor said; "You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I got my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedez. I figure that if she doesn''t like the diamond ring, she will at least like the Mercedez, and she will know that I love her." After finishing his scotch, the lawyer replied; "Well, on my last anniversary, I got my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn''t like the pearls, she would at least like the trip, and she would know that I love her." The Biker then took a big swig from his beer, and said; "Yah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a tee-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn''t like the tee-shirt, she could go fuck herself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me in a nutshell: Agh! What the Hell! Why am I in a nutshell!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I too believe more women should be in Government. That''s why I support Betsy DeVos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What direction was Kanye West facing when his dough was rising? Yeast ;D *cringe*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you should work until your bank account looks like a phone number. I checked my balance and realized, if that was true, I could retire! I have $9.11 in my account.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the squirrel blush after he was hit by a car? He was flattered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 4 letter word for "talks nonstop" I keep trying to enter girl, but it doesn''t work. I think the writers did this wrong.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone and Jason Statham were sitting around a table When they came up for an idea for a TV series based on the lives of classical musicians. They had all the details nailed down: the music, the plot, the decor, etc. However, they couldn''t decide which character each actor was going to play in the series. Eventually, the three came to an agreement. Stallon said: "I like Canon in D, so i''ll be Pachelbel" Statham said: "I like Moonlight Sonata, so i''ll be Beethoven" Schwarzenegger said: "I like Toccata and Fugue, so i''ll be Bach"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A neutron walks into a bar and says "how much for a drink?" The bartender says, "for you, no charge!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Life gives you a cheese grater... You hold it up and say, ''Life''s grate''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do suicide bombers go when they die? All over the place', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of terrorists with music degrees? Al coda', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the famous chain-smoking Dutch painter? Vincent Van Cough', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend found one of my puns so funny that she flew into space and told it to an alien. Unfortunately, the alien didn''t laugh. Personally, I think she took the joke a bit too far.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went by the house I grew up in and asked if I can take a look around, but they said "no" and slammed the door on me My parents can be real jerks sometimes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The dad, husband and pastor of a woman arrive outside a hospital delivery room The nurse stated that the hospital policy only allowed one person to be in the delivery room with the woman. Unfortunately, all 3 became confused when the woman giving birth screamed, "FATHER I NEED YOU".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my men like I like my coffee Made by my mother-in-law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A female weightlifter goes to the doctor A female weightlifter goes to the doctor and says "I''ve been taking steroids that long I''ve grown a cock" Doctor "Anabolic"? Female " No, just a cock"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('taxi A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the sidewalk, and stopped inches from a shop window. For a second, everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look friend, don''t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said he didn''t realize that a little tap could scare him so much. The driver replied, "Sorry, it''s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver - I''ve been driving a hearse for the last 25 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('bad ass A Marine Aviator lands on an Aircraft Carrier. He gets out of his aircraft and has a shoe box under his arm. He goes down to the Mess Hall for lunch, looks around and says " I"m the baddest dude on this ship and I can prove it"! He opens the shoe box and pulls out a snapping turtle. He pokes the turtle in the eyes, it opens its mouth and he pulls his dick out of his pants and puts it into the turtles mouth. The turtle starts biting down, blood is shooting all over and everyone in the Mess Hall is shocked. He pokes the turtle in the eyes again it opens its mouth and he puts his dick back into his pants. He looks around and says " any of you bad enough to do that"! A young Navy Recruit from the back says " I''LL give it a try, just don''t poke me in the eyes"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The biggest question of our generation... Who makes the sandwich in a lesbian relationship?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father-son talk A father asked his 12 year old son if he knew how babies were made, so the kid started crying: I don''t want to know! Please don''t tell me! The confused father asked the boy why he didn''t want to know. "Because when I was 6 I was told the easter bunny wasn''t real. When I was 7 you told me the tooth fart wasn''t real and when I was 10 I found out santa wasn''t real! Now you''re gonna tell me adults don''t actually screw?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s the thing about George Clooney''s wives... Once you''ve seen one, you''ve seen Amal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long are math snakes? 3.14 feet. Well, at least the thon is (I''m so sorry)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can a woman make a man a millionaire? Yes, if he''s a billionaire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens after NASA farts? It apollogises.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Bobby Shmurda go to jail? He was convicted with second degree shmurder', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a chalk of boxlets... Ya never know what yer gonna ship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump heard that some of Patriots weren''t coming to the White House. They say he was deflated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snowman puns to celebrate the snowstorm in my area What do vampires get when they bite snowmen? "Frostbite" What is a snowman''s favorite cereal? "Snowflakes" Why didn''t the snowman answer the question? "He didn''t snow the answer" What does a snowman like to ride? "An icicle" How can you tell a snowman is angry at you? "You get the cold shoulder... or an icy stare"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m almost a millionaire! I have all the zeros, just looking for the one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was having trouble staying awake at work but my coworker beat me to the last cup of coffee in the pot. It''s like they say: if you lose you snooze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does anyone else get as excited about Valentine''s Day coming up as they did about Christmas when they were little? Or is it just because I''m Jewish?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pencil that won''t draw on colored paper? An erase-ist (e-racist).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the doctor say to the annoying patient who didn''t like the way he was stitching up his cut? Suture self.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two black guys are pissing off a dock and into a lake... *Two black guys are pissing off a dock and into a lake...* *...one guy says to the other:* **"Man, this water''s cold!"** *The other guy replies:* **"And deep too!"**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After accidentally shooting his pet with the shrink ray, my friend decided to give the pet away. It''s my newt now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do hipsters love field hockey? Because it''s ice hockey before it gets cool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When are men the smartest? NSFW Before sex, during sex, or after sex? During sex because he''s plugged into miss know it all! Edit: a word', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did a passing motorist say to the elderly SS Officer? Give it some gas grandpa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me to try out a gloryhole, since you can pretend it''s a woman on the other side I''ve sucked 5 dicks so far and I still have no idea how this is supposed to work', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I prayed to god to end violence on earth. He responded to my ticket saying "You shouldn''t have rolled on a PvP server"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man farted every morning when he woke up. His wife got very annoyed and disgusted by this, so she made a plan to get him to stop. One day after the man farted, she said "honey, you know if you keep forcing those farts every morning your guts will slip right out." You see, the wife was a butcher. That night she took some pig''s guts home from the shop in a cooler and stuffed them in the man''s pants while he was sleeping. The next morning the wife woke up and her husband was in the bathroom for the next 2 hours. He comes out and the wife asks what he had been doing in there. The man replied "You were right about my guts dear, but with the help of God and my own two fingers I managed to get them back up there!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only person in my life that told me to smile... Was the camera man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fun fact: there are obese people outside the USA yeah, fat americans on vacation...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone once asked me why I don''t tell ''your mom'' jokes... I responded by saying that ''your mom'' are so overused. Just like your mom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? Mr. Pibb can''t perform.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('for those of you with a sense of humour and are sick of car ads try this when you see a car ad in your mind replace the word "car" with "cat" when you look at your cat he/she will think your ready for the loonie bin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need to find the watch I misplaced But I can''t seem to find the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(NSFW) Someone ordered pizza to the twin towers on 9/11... They got two large plains', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke is ironic. This joke is not ironic. Isn''t that ironic?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People need to learn to live in the moment, because the here and now is a special gift. Thats why I call it the present.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are black people so loud? Because they think we can''t hear them ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friend asked to use my phone to call his mom.. Told him to just hit redial.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Frosty the Snowman''s most favorite comedian? Bill Brrrrr. I''ll see myself out...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] What does a superstitious pimp check every day? His whore-o-scope.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend told me that laughter is the best medicine Now I understand why Jeff Dunham is so sick all the time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of bakery has the fastest service? A Russian bakery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the quickest way to get in touch with your inner self? Single-ply toilet paper', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Clothing related typos... They''re the vest', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Queen Elizabeth may have lived to be 102, but Diana got up to 120 when she died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the church music director''s biggest fear? Crabs on their organ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I said hello to a feminist today. Trials start next week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of cheese is not yours? American cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a seafood disco last night Pulled a mussel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pension office demanded my 86 year old grandfather prove his age. He had no copy of his birth certificate and his driver''s license had long since expired. But, he went to the office and demanded to see his administrator. He took off his hat, showed his white hair and balding head and said, "There, is that proof enough I''m old enough to receive a pension?" The administrator agreed and cut him his check. He proudly returned home to show grandmother and she said, "Great, but you should have taken off your pants and shown him your willy too, you would have got disability benefits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An African immigrant just arrived in Italy and doesn''t know how to make money He asks another immigrant, "So, how do you survive here?" The immigrant says, "Well, it''s very easy. You put up a sign around your neck saying you''re hungry, and let people give you money. 8 hours a day, and you make around 50-60." "Wow", says the African immigrant, "I''ll try to follow your advice. Thank you." After a year, the two meet again. The African immigrant is surprisingly wealthy. He wears a custom made Gucci tuxedo, a Rolex, and his hands are full of golden ornaments. "How did you become so rich?!" the immigrant asks. The African immigrant replies, "I followed your advice. I put a sign saying <I''m an immigrant, I want to go home, please help me>"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do churches hate geometry? There''s too many sins involved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the Koala get the job? He didn''t have... The Koala-fications.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you combine Richard Simmons with Stephen Hawking? A fruit and a vegetable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People keep asking me what I''ll be doing in 3 years time Like come on guys I don''t have 2020 vision', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady has a perfect record in the Super Bowl He''s 5 out of 7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump plan to alleviate world hunger and illegal immigration . . . . . . he''s going to round up all illegal aliens and issue them Soylent Green cards', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a hookers and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a dream last night that I was reading Lord of the Rings to people. Turns out I was just Tolkien in my sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the third member in a German and Russian gangbang? Poland', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A marketing executive walks into a bar I guess it was set too low.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Altoid mean? I''ve always wondered what that word mint', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superman was flying above Metropolis When he saw Wonder Woman sunbathing on the roof of the Justice League, totally naked. Superman thinks to himself, ''Hey, I''m Superman, I could fly down there really fast and fuck Wonder Woman, and she''d never know.'' So Superman flies down and fucks Wonder Woman so fast she doesn''t even see him. When he''s done, Wonder Woman sits up and says "What the fuck was that?", To which the Invisible Man replies, "I dunno, but my asshole is killing me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the chemist shout, noticing only half his water was deuterated? DOH', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does America and Apple both have in common? They both started to de-port when jobs died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This valentines day be sure not to buy flowers from any Monks. Because only you can prevent florist friars!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fat girl in yoga pants at Walmart? Cashier', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 1940 kids will get this A job', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Politics] Is mental gymnastics an Olympic Sport? If it is, Sean Spicer could take home the gold, silver and bronze for the US.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a date for Valentinesday 14. February', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s preparing Mexico for the Olympics. Every Mexican took gold in the pole vault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many gay men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, but it takes the entire ER staff to get it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m gonna name my first kid Robot. That way no matter what he''ll always have a job!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to steal toys from the hobby shop, but they caught me when I started taking the Airfix sets I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren''t for you modelling kits!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Chinese cat say? *mao*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The terra-cotta warriors are fake They were mass-produced in Chinese sweatshops.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about my hairy, cannibalistic uncle? He was an aunt-eater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering a minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried out for suicide club I didn''t make the cut', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the presidential toilet? The Donald Dump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two lesbians in a closet? A Liquor Cabinet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The boys asked, "Grandma, are you watching today''s football match?" She asks which match. "Austria-Hungary". She answers& "Against whom?" Stolen from r/witze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am very happy with my wife. She likes to compliment me from time to time..... Otherday she was telling me that I have the biggest cock among my friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s least favorite state? New Mexico.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Valley Girl say when she could only understand even numbers? I can''t odd', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smokers go out in the cold for 10+ minutes a day and freeze their asses off in the winter and what do they do they get in return? Cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shoveling snow is great exercise \- Satan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Poor farmers Farmers are having an awful time at the moment in Ireland. No grants, no profit, just terrible. John: "Well Tom how are things, how''s the farming?" Tom: "Bad John, I think I''m going to switch from milking cows to raising cocks" John: "Why is that?" Tom: "Well farmers need the cocks to breed with the hens so there will be a rake of money in it." John: "How many cocks have you got?" Tom: "Only the 3, come down to the haggard and I''ll show you. One is normal, one is dyslexic and the other is gay." Cock 1: "Cockle-Doodle-Doo!" Cock 2: "Doodle-Doo-A-Cock!" Cock 3: "Any-Cock''ll-Doo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common? I don''t care if she has either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the joke of the traveler? Wait until he arrives, then he will tell you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cultural Difference A man and his mail order bride, straight from China, are lying in bed when the man suddenly feels the urge to have sex. He looks at his wife and says "Our sex life is kind of boring, we should do something different." "Like what?" inquires his wife. "How about 69?" he replies. The wife ponders a moment and says "That different, yes, but why you want broccoli egg roll and shrimp-fried rice to have sex?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Tumblr bad for you? Because it contains too much Transfat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in my day, we didn''t have MTV... We had to smoke pot and watch the radio!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pretty lady sits next to a man at a bar Man: You''re beautiful. Your definitely going to get laid tonight! Lady: You''re cocky. How do you know that? Man: Because I''m stronger than you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Hispanic sniper? A Puerto-recon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob and Jim walk into a bar "Hey Donkeyboy, get me a drink." The bartender gets him a drink. Bob says, "Donkeyboy, get me another drink." The bartender gets him another drink. Finally, Jim asks the bartender, "Why does he call you Donkeyboy?" "I don''t know. Hehaw-hehaw-he always calls me that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the three greatest lies? a)the check is in the mail b)small is beatiful c)I won''t come in your mouth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A millennial moves house... Knock knock Who dis? New door', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so racist, I would only date from the one true race... ...The human race', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to push Donald Trump into a vat of wet cement but I decided not to... ...It would have really set a bad president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the shittiest part of Object Oriented Programming? Reading the abbreviation backwards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I booked a table for me and my girl... for valentines day. shes going to go mental she hates snooker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love to squeeze my girlfriend when she is on her period. She is like my little ketchup packet .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad Joke It was my birthday an me and my Dad were driving on the highway when we saw a terrible accident. My Dad said "This is the worst accident I''ve seen in 20years!" Well yeah it was my 20th birthday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A museum curator obtains a valuable painting called "The Joke" The painting is put on exhibit, and to celebrate its arrival the museum throws a large party. Everyone there has an amazing time, and leaves very happy. The curator in all his excitement forgets to lock the museum. When he arrives at work the next day, he finds a terrifying sight. The painting is gone, with no trace to be found. He reports the theft, and the police come looking for it. After 4 days, the curator gets a call from the police with more information. "Have you found it?" he asked. The officer responded "No sir, I''m very sorry. We''ve looked everywhere but we can''t find the joke."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The absolute value of zero. lol', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A female gorilla is alone in a cage at a zoo... ... She has become very cranky due to her isolation and has become increasingly aggressive. Her problematic behavior has become a concern of the zookeeper who decides to try to fix it. While trying to come up with a solution he notices the janitor, a very sleazy redneck type and gets an idea. He walks over to him and asks: "Would you be willing to.. perhaps have sex with a gorilla for 500 dollars?" The janitor thinks about it for a while and agrees but on 3 conditions. "First!" He says, "I don''t want to have to kiss her. Understood?" "Yes." Says the zookeeper. "Second!" The janitor says, "I don''t want anyone to know about this!" "Alright" says the zookeeper, "And what''s the third condition?" "I''m going to need a little bit more time to come up with the 500 dollars."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Oxy Tribe is an ancient tribe full of highly smart and intelligent people. So what do you call a stupid Oxy? An oxymoron', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a cannibal call his girlfriend? Cutie pie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse walks into a bar... People begin to quickly, but calmly leave the bar as they realize the potential danger of the situation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the highlight of the bulimic bachelor party? It was when the cake came out of the girl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I won $100 on a radio competition this morning. The DJ called me and said, We are going live in a few seconds, Im going to ask you what youre going to spend your money on and I want you to tell the listeners on air. Okay I replied. He said, 3&2&.1&.. Congratulations to Lefty, our competition winner, what are you going to spend the money on? I said, Im going to spend it on air.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('5% of the time I make typing mistakes while messaging english speaking friends and 95% the German auto-correction will just.. Flicken es...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump ''complained hand towels on Air Force One are not soft enough'' After He Wiped His Ass With The Constitution', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock. Knock. Who is there? Pizza delivery. Pizza delivery who? Pizza Inn. Pizza in whom?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are 50 babies, each holding a gun, called? An infantry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the clown on the loose in the textile factory? The manager was in stitches', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think I have OCD. I Think I Have OCD. I think I have O.C.D. I think I have O.C.D..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Travelling doctors are an interesting idea... ...but they don''t work in practice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the chicken unrecognizable? It crossed too much', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into a voodoo market... She walks up to an old man selling cursed items where she proceeds to say "I would like to buy a magic mirror for my cheating boyfriend so he can break it and have 7 years of bad luck." The old man reaches into his drawer and pulls out a condom. He says "if he''s cheating, then 7 years isn''t enough. If he breaks this, he will get 18."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Over the last few weeks i''ve been collecting details about my life and adding them to spreadsheet on my computer. I''ve really exelled myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We used to have Reagan, Jonny Cash and Bob Hope Now we have Trump, no cash, and no hope.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call when a Programmer pukes at IHop? A Stack Overflow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Phone statistics in third world countries: Phone statistics in third world countries: Boy to Boy 00:00:59 Boy to Mom 00:00:50 Boy to Dad 00:00:30 Boy to Girl 01:23:59 Girl to Girl 05:29:59 Girl to Boy Missed call Husband to Wife 00:00:03 Wife to Husband 14 Missed Calls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vladimir Putin is banning Brazzers saying it''s bad for the psyche. "Psyche". Now I know how to say ''wrist'' in Russian!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a writer, I often correct grammar online and get called a Grammar Nazi because of it. I''m not a Grammar Nazi, okay? I''m just alt-literate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to open a gym for people with fetishes. It''s a great idea in theory, but I''m still trying to work out the kinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to get free internet @ home I live in an apartment complex so I have neighbors left to right and below me. One day I asked my neighbor if he was interested in splitting the cost of my wifi 50/50 so he could also use it. He agreed. I went on to my other neighbor downstairs and asked him the same thing. Now both my neighbors are paying for my wifi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sieg Heil by Covergirl Girls use chemicals to remove polish and no one panics. Hitler does the same thing and everyone loses their minds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a greedy oyster? Shellfish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw someone robbing a store and went to stop him. He hit me with a bag of golden coins. I guess you could say I had some cents knocked into me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my coffee how I like my calculus expressions: Limitless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always carry a bomb around with me ... What is the likelihood of having two bombs in the same place at the same time?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife thinks I''m "selfish in the bedroom". She''s the one that won''t let me sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old People Always Poke Me Old people at wedding always poke me and say You Are the Next . . So, I Started Doing The Same Thing To Them At Funerals', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate weeping willows. They''re too sappy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sexy up skirt... As I knelt down with a pair of size 4 shoes in front of this sexy blonde in a short skirt, I couldnt resist a quick glance at her panties. Hey perv!! she said as she gave me a playful kick. I bet the only reason you work here is to look up girls skirts isnt it? Thats an absolutely ridiculous accusation, miss, I said sternly. I dont fucking work here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus needs love too The night before he was arrested and crucified, his followers started to worry. Christ was still a virgin; wouldnt it be nice to have him experience a little bit of pleasure before he dies? So they asked Mary Magdalene to go to the tent where Christ was resting and seduce him; Mary said she would do it gladly and went in, but five minutes later, she ran out screaming, terrified and furious. The followers asked her what went wrong, and she explained: I slowly undressed, spread my legs and showed Christ my pussy; he looked at it, said What a terrible wound! It should be healed! and gently put his palm on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde took her son to a doctor.. A blonde took her son to a doctor: Doctor, I think my son swallowed a key! I''m so worried Doctor: Calm down and tell me when did this happen? Blonde: About a week ago. Doctor: Why the hell didn''t you bring him to me earlier? Blonde: We had a spare but now that''s also lost', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paper or plastic? I went to buy condoms the other day. I asked the guy if he could double bag it for me. He just looked at me and said "You''re gonna have to do that yourself buddy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a two dimensional shape that works out way too much? A Noneckagon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tennis players got into a shouting match. They made quite a racket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many nuns does it take to change a lightbulb? Nun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend had his appendix removed and was out shooting with his other friends not a day later. Turns out cops don''t like it when you try to kill them. Poor appendix didn''t stand a chance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vladislav There was once a man named Vladislav. He worked an average job, received minimum wage, and was frustrated with his life. One day he received a call from his wife, who told him out of guilt that she had been cheating on him for several months now, and wanted to stop by the house to collect her belongings before she left him. Upon reaching home, the wife saw Vlad sitting on a couch, staring at the wall. "Vladislav..." He looks at her and says with an unmoving expression: "Baby, don''t hurt me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Super Bowl Champions refuse to meet Trump at the White House? Because they were Patriots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Betsy look so distracted Her husband devos her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than /r/jokes? the comments in /r/jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate walks into a bar.. With a wheel on his crotch. The bar tender says "Aye, what''s with the wheel?" Pirate says "arrrrrghhhhhh, it be driving me nuts"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many bacteria does it take to change a lightbulb? One ... no, two ... no, four ... no, eight ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a barbershop and says, do you cut pubic hair? The Barber, a little taken back, says, "well, sure, why not?" The man bares his teeth and says, "Great. Can you get this one?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am annoyed that my wife came up with a girls name for my penis I don''t even know who Ana Conda is!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Masturbating An 8-year-old choir boy catches the priest masturbating. He said, "What are you doing father?" "It''s called masturbating," the priest replied. "You''ll be doing this soon." "Why father?" he asked. "Because my wrist is killing me," the priest replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw an old school friend today and he started bragging about his well paid job, his flash expensive car and his enormous house. Then he took a photo out of his wallet, showed it to me and said. "That''s my wife, isn''t she beautiful"? I looked it at and said "If you think she''s beautiful, you should see my wife" He said "Why, is she a stunner? I said "No, she''s a fucking optometrist!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do call an irrational fear of fake bees? A faux bee, aah!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tugboat captains have been friends for years. They would always cry, "Aye!" and blow their whistles whenever they passed each other. A new crewman asked his boat''s mate, "What do they do that for?" The mate looked surprised and replied, "You mean that you''ve never heard of ... an aye for an aye?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Knock knock*-forever *Knock knock* Who''s there? ..Deja Deja who? *Knock knock* Who''s there? ..Deja Deja who? *Knock knock* Who''s there? ..Deja Deja who? *Knock knock* Who''s there? ..Deja Deja who? *knock knock*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s blue and not very heavy? Light blue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s to coolest member of staff in the hospital? The ultrasound guy. And then who takes the title when he goes on holiday? The hip replacement man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bad joke? POTUS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the guy who couldn''t pay for his exorcism? He got repossessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a dig bick You that read wrong You read that wrong too', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s im season at the White House Peach', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog with no hind legs and balls of steel? Sparky...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes Jeff such a bad boy Racist sessions', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a really smart dinosaur? A Professaur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate breakups. Especially when they try to let you down gently. "It''s not you, it''s me" "I just need some space" "We can still be cousins".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned a few things today. 1. I''m gonna be a dad! 2. I''m gonna be an uncle! 3. My sisters not on the pill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He likes to bury coal He''s a deepholeable', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police in London have found a bomb outside a mosque. They''ve told the public not to panic as they''ve managed to push it inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Instead of The sandy Hook students recieving books... They got Magazines instead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was telling her friend , "I helped my husband become a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him?" "A billionaire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DNA Test :) Dad: Whats ur Result? Son: Ive failed in 5 subjects. Dad: From now Onwards Dont Call Me DAD. Son: Oh Come On Dad! Its my School Test Not a DNA Test.. :-D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife says I never listen. I can prove she''s wrong. That''s because she never says anything', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Redditor posted ten wordplay jokes hoping one would get to the front page... No pun in ten did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Doctor, I want to live very old - Do you drink? - Never, only water. - You smoke? - Oh no, my body is a temple - Do you have crazy nights out dancing while doing cocaine and coming back home to have unprotected sex with multiple partners? - Never, I''m s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and his llama walked into a bar... They ordered a drink and had a good time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the praying mantis cannibalize her boyfriend He refused to eat her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the new emo pizza? It cuts itself', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do fascists hate snowflakes? Because of Stalingrad flashbacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the most poetic videogame character? Sonnet the Hedgehog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I already got a date this valentine''s day. Her name is Emma, Emma Gination.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn''t moved a muscle in over a year? A trophy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the three rings of marriage? The engagement ring, the wedding ring and the suffering.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thyme is actually the most medicinal herb it heals all wounds', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Syrian say about the airline food? He''d say it was awful if he could get on the plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about striking women? I think it''s dreadful, nobody should be striking women.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Working holiday A husband comes home to find his wife with her suitcases packed in the living room. "Where are you going?" he asks. "I''m going to Las Vegas. I can earn $200 for a blow job there, and I figured that I might as well earn money for what I do for you for free." The husband thinks for a moment, goes upstairs, and comes back down, with his suitcase packed as well. "Where are you going?" the wife asks. "I''m coming with you. I want to see how you can live on $200 a year."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love open-minded people. Like JFK and Kurt Cobain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who came first. The chicken or the egg A very embarrassed rooster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom told me some bad news today... She said her joints are getting weaker, so I told her to roll them tighter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family had two boys and a girl named Anne... the brothers shared a common Anne sister.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar... ...and tells the bartender "Give me anything but a Budweiser." So the bartender hands him a beer, the man drinks it, and leaves. Next day, man comes in and says "Give me anything but a Budweiser." Bartender gives him a beer, the man drinks it, and leaves. Next day, he comes back with the same request. The bartender is obviously very curious at this points. So he asks "What is the problem with Budweiser?" The man answers "Well, I once drank 20 Budweisers, went home, and blew chunks." The bartender laughs and says "That would happen to anyone after drinking 20 of any beer." The man looks around sheepishly and whispers "Chunks is my dog''s name."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top tip: buying heroin? Get some extra for later. It''s a bit more-ish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Balding grizzles pass their genes to their offspring or... Bare bears bear bare bears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only every guy gets this..... Morning Wood', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Dr Pepper come in cans? Because his wife left him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bee order a cup of coffee? For a quick buzz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t the pony yell? His voice is too horse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At St. Peter''s Catholic Church in Toronto , they have weekly husband''s marriage seminars. At the session last week, the priest asked Giuseppe, who said he was approaching his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he had managed to stay married to the same woman all these years. Giuseppe replied to the assembled husbands, "Wella, I''va tried to treat her nicea, spenda da money on her, but besta of all is, I tooka her to Italy for the 25th anniversary!" The priest responded, "Giuseppe, you are an amazing inspiration to all the husbands here! Please tell us what you are planning for your wife for your 50th anniversary?" Giuseppe proudly replied, " I gonna go pick her up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey girl look me in the eyes "Mmmmmno" "Why not" "I have a boyfriend. In fact I shouldn''t be here sucking your dick"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only pre-2017 kids will get this A decent public education', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t sleep with any girl... Don''t sleep with any girl that can spell gonorrhea correctly, without looking it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Person 1 to person 2: whats up my brother from another mother Person 2: aren''t we siblings? Person 1: yeah sorry you''re adopted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are lawyers buried deeper than regular people? Because deep down, they''re really nice guys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the least heavy kind of energy? Light Energy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy came into my shoe shop today He said, "I''d like a pair of red shoes please." "Certainly sir," I replied. "What size?" "Size 40." Fucking clown.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thanks to World War I There are now more airplanes in the ocean than their are submarines in the sky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your life is awful, get a rope and a stool ...and find the next tree. Throw the rope over a branch and attach the stool to the rope. Now you''ve got a swing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Nancy suck at foot races? Her boots are made for walking', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 3 year old boy sits next to a pregnant women Boy: Why do you look so fat? Woman: because i have a baby inside Boy: is it a good baby? Woman: yes it''s a very good baby Boy: then why''d you eat it? I know this is an old joke heard it a while ago and told some of my friend and they never heard it so thought you might enjoy it aswell. No need to upvote as i didnt make it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2, but nobody knows how they got in there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone stole my pencil case off my desk and ran with it I guess it''s no longer stationery', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love discussing religion with the cashier at the supermarket Because the customer is always right', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stephen Hawking is a very paranoid man He''s always looking over his shoulder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the high Australian scientist say to his partner Stoichi while holding a broccoli? "Oy Stoichi oy''ma tree! Pretty cool huh?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife what she wanted for Valentine''s Day and she said ''treat me like a princess!'' I''m having her killed in a traffic accident in Paris.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor gave me 4 weeks to live He said he''ll shoot me if I still can''t pay his bill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday someone knocked on my door. When I opened it I was surprised to see Bill Gates standing on my front porch. "Have you accepted the Microsoft Terms and Conditions into your heart?" he asked. Apparently he''s joined the Windows Witnesses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the Catholic Church and Pimples... Pimples don''t come on your face until you turn 10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a millionaire in the white house? A public offender', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Catholics so anti-abortion? Because if women stop having kids, who are the priests going to rape?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Catholic church and sexual abuse... Is a pretty touchy subject if you ask me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not everyone may think digging tunnels is exciting Some may even call it boring', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to reclose an opened bottle of champagne? I don''t know, ask Falcons fans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A female blond police officer pulls over another blond female driver.. Blond police officer: "Can I see your license and registration?" Driver: "What''s a license?" Police officer: "It''s a thing in your purse with your picture on it." Driver: *Fumbles through purse and finds her reflection on a mirror and hands it to the officer* Police officer: *looks in mirror and sees own reflection and hands the mirror back the driver* Police officer: "I''m so sorry for pulling you over, I didn''t know you were a fellow officer, have a great day" *Walks away*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you ever notice that No 2 pencils look alike? It''s true', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no "B" batteries? You would never be able to ask for them without sounding like you have a stutter. "B-Batteries please"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man loses his wife to cancer. Frustrated and depressed, he goes to sleep for the night. We wakes up with a massive erection. Guess you could say he had mourning wood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mirror, a condom and a grain of salt walk into a bar. The grain of salt looks at the mirror and tells him "if e I spill you get 1 year of bad luck", the mirror responds "Well, if I break you get 7 years of bad luck", then the condom interrupts and says "Well, if I break then you''ll have bad luck for the rest of your days".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prism What does a prism make when it doesn''t like something? A disdainbow. What does it make when it wants to fight? A painbow What does it make when it can''t walk? A canebow ...when it needs to get somewhere quickly? A trainbow ...when it really, REALLY needs to get somewhere quickly? A planebow ...when it can only make one color? A plainbow ...when it''s a smart prism? A brainbow ...when it''s baking bread? A grainbow ...when it''s building something? A cranebow ...when it needs to hold on to something? A containbow ...when the Joker is attacking Gotham City? A Bruce Waynebow ...when its name is Tarzan? A Janebow ...when it''s the King of Prisms? A reignbow ...when it''s poisoned? A banebow ...when it''s inside a blood vessel? A veinbow ...when it belongs to a wizard? An arcanebow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Sally go after the bombing? Everywhere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Trump cabinet is truly diverse. I counted at least 3 different shades of white in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than a satellite around Saturn? A probe in Uranus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbors listen to great music. Whether they like it or not.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you bring back Australian gold from an alternate universe. You have AU AU Au.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking late at night. And saw three strong men beating an old lady, i got into the fight ... And we almost kill the bitch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('student loans... that''s it, that''s the joke. It takes like 1000 years to pay off your debt. Longer than it took you to earn your degree.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the first thing Adam said to Eve ? "Stand back .... I don''t know how big this thing is going to grow!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did everyone pass the final confectioner exam? It was a piece of cake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends are like peeing in your pants... Everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nerve impulse... A nerve impulse is caused when a stimulus changes the membrane potential of a neuron and opens voltage-gated sodium channels. This sodiums flows into the neuron and down the axon to the next synapse. So every nerve impuse, everything we experience and every move we make, comes from sodium ions in our cells... No wonder people are so damn salty about everything!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are suicidal people so good at doing laundry. Because they''re good at hanging things.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an empty bottle of Cheese Whiz? Cheese Was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the German sausage say to the French bread? Gluten tag!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We all know a Mexican standoff and a Canadian standoff So an American standoff is when two people are flipping each other off but you know nothing''s going to happen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men go bear hunting. The first man asks, "Have you ever hunted bear before?" The second man replies, "No, but I''ve been fishing in shorts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles? Because he''s a fuckin'' creep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian alcoholic loses the key to car... His wife wakes him from his drunken slumber. "Where are the keys to the car!?" she demands. "Vodka? Whiskey?" he replies. (read with Russian accent)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom has this really weird fetish. She liked dressing up as herself all the time and then acting like a total fucking bitch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I no longer saw the point in swordfighting.... I no longer saw the point in swordfighting after it blinded both my eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest and a rabbi are at a wedding... the priest sees an altar boy, and says, "man I''d really like to screw him." The rabbi responds by saying, "out of what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What city has the most people eating waffles on the beach? San Diego', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two muffins are baking in an oven. One muffin says to the other "Man, it''s hot in here!" The other muffin says "HOLY SHIT, A TALKING MUFFIN?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None. Its a hardware problem.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiting at the bus station Excuse me, sir, have you seen a police officer around? No, not a soul, actually. Very good, now give me your wallet, watch and laptop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My teacher told me if I slept with her I''d get an A for the semester. I love being homeschooled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting pulled over Police officer to a driver: OK, drivers license, vehicle license, first aid kit and warning triangle. Driver: Nah, Ive already got all that. But how much for that funny Captains cap?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to buy my ex chocolate all the time She was such a bitch, I hoped it would kill her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a pound of fat look good? Put a nipple on it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The red man lives in the red house, the orange man lives in the orange house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house. Who lives in the white house? Also the orange man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Republicans are the true snowflakes... they''re white, they''re cold, and if you put enough of em together they''ll shut down public schools EDIT* Thanks for the gold! You popped my gold cherry! its a joke folks. just a joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An android phone and an iPhone meet after a year. **iPhone**: What......the......fuck.....dude? You.....are.....infested.....with.....malware!! **Android Phone**: Fuckers don''t update me. But what happened to you? Why are speaking with a lag? **iPhone**: Fuckers.....updated......me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2100s kids won''t get this Jobs (Robots will take them all)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... and a table... and a chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Buddhist Monk walks up to a hotdog stand. "make me one with everything"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My ex and I didn''t work out because of our birth signs I''m a cancer she was a cunt, her Pisces smelled like a Taurus and she was anything but a Virgo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you are what you eat That explains why I''m such a pussy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 sons Four guys are at a high school reunion and one of them goes to the restroom. The other three guys start talking about how succesful their sons are. Guy 1: My son is so successful he owns a cardealership and just gave his best friend a Ferarri. Guy 2: Thats nothing, my son owns an airliner and just gave his best friend a private jet Guy 3: Well my son is more success than that, he owns an architecture firm and just gave his best friend a castle Guy 4 walks out of the bathroom and walks over to the other 3 guys Guy 4: Hey guys what are we talking about Guy 1: Oh, we are talking about how successful our sons are Guy 4:Well, my son is a Gay stripper Guy 2: You must be so dissappointed with what he''s done with his life Guy 4: Actually, he is doing very well for himself. He just got a Ferrari, a jet, and a castle from his three boyfriends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Android users won''t get this. Update.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is software engineering? It is a bad joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a nurse working on a pirate ship? An Arrrrr - N', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog with no legs? I really doesn''t matter he''s not gonna come.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Windows 10 users won''t get this. Privacy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about identity theft? Sharon is Karen!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two tornados in Las Vegas? They decided to elope after a whirlwind romance!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Beggar To A Rich Person A beggar to a rich person: Sir please give me 10$, i have to drink tea Rich: But you can drink tea only in 5$ Beggar: Sir, my girl friend will drink tea too Rich: Oh, wow a beggar made a girl friend... Beggar: No Sir, Girl friend made me a beggar (few days ago i was the honor of this hotel)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did mummy tower say to the baby tower Here comes the aeroplane!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump did a better job getting people to exercise in 1 month than Michelle Obama did in 8 years Look at all those protesters on the streets!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t French people count to 5? There''s a tree in the way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are vegetables so hard to eat sometimes? The wheelchairs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar waving his gun around A man walks into the bar waving his gun around yelling, "I have 45 calibre Colt 1911 with a seven round magazine plus one in the chamber and I want to know who''s been sleeping with my wife!" A voice from the back of the room called out, "You''re gonna need more ammo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Muhammad go after the bombing? Everywhere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I destroy every string instrument I find... As a part of my vow of non-violins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor! I think I have a concussion! Doctor: "Dont worry, Its all in your head"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t anyone hear psychiatrists in the bathroom? The p is silent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pistachio say to the peanut? Who wants to eat something that starts with P and ends with NUTs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who designed bathtubs? Seriously, I haven''t been able to fully sit comfortably submerged in a bath tub since I was 11.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Spanish Optometrist say to his Patient? Si?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the useless piece of skin on a dick? The man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women keep telling me to "stop itemizing them" Then they go and call me a dickhead', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 2010''s kids will get this... Measles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him! I''ll leave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to the cheerleader when she did the splits? 20 class rings fell out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10 Inch Bic Two Men were out fishing when one decides to have a smoke He asks the other guy if he has a lighter He replies "Yes I do!" and hands the other a 10 inch long cigarette lighter Surprised the guy asks "Where did you get this?" The guy replies "Oh I have a personal genie." The first man asks "Can I make a wish? " Sure says the other man "Just make sure that you speak clearly cause he is a little hard of hearing" "Ok I will" says the other as he rubs the lamp a genie appears and asks the man what he wants The man says " I want a Million Bucks " The genie says OK and goes back to his bottle and 10 seconds later a million ducks fly over head And the guy says to the other " Your genie realy sucks at hearing doesnt he?" The other man replies "I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally spilled spot remover on my dog. It scared the shit out of him and now I need some for my carpet :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, I heard somebody called you an owl today. Who?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only vaccinated kids will get this... Autism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a 2017 Tesla and 50 dead babies? I don''t have a 2017 Tesla in my garage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between E.T. and an illegal immigrant? E.T. learned the language, and eventually went home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I noticed something about the letter "B" Sometimes it makes subtle appearances', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a team-up between a maniac, a random white guy, and the head of the Vatican? Snapped, Cracker and Pope', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a reptile climb a mountain? It scales it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A physicist goes into an ice-cream parlour every week He always orders an ice cream sundae and offers one to the empty stool next to him. One day the owner of the shop asks the physicist, "Why do you do that?" The physicist replies, "Well, quantum mechanics teaches us that there is a chance that the matter above this stool will spontaneously transform into a beautiful woman who will accept my offer of an ice cream and fall in love with me." The owner says, "We have beautiful women come in here all the time. Why don''t you offer one of them an ice cream and maybe she''ll fall in love with you." And the physicist replies, "Yeah, right! What are the odds of THAT happening?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only 1, but the lightbulb has to be willing to change', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only gay men from the 1980s will get this... The gradual acceptance into society. What did you think I was going to say, you sick fucks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar One man says, "give me some h2o" A second man walks in and says, "give me some h2o too" The second man dies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the snowman so upset? Because somebody had stolen his nose and the police didn''t carrot all!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Helen Keller drive? Because she''s a woman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a caterpillar afraid of? A dogapillar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a Mexican guy in a vegetative state? Coma estas?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a French man wearing sandals? Phil-lip Phil-lop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did JayZ call Beyonce before they got married? Feyonce', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was supposed to be filming a porno but I was late to the set. The cameraman phoned me up and said, "Will you be long?" I said, "Yes, around 9 inches."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why California hates Donald Trump? Because life in California is like GTA (Grand Theft Auto).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doctor says i have myopic attendance syndrome I can''t see myself coming in to work today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the Earl of Lemongrab had hair... ...do you think he''d use an acceptable conditioner to keep it soft?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a rabbit with fleas Bugs bunny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you eat your Reese''s? Witherspoon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had to quit my job as a pool cleaner... It was too draining.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The last time I was someone''s type, I was donating blood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to be like Leonardo DiCaprio from Inception. He has a dream job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend is blind, you know what that means... he can''t see.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My belt was looking a bit worn so I bought a new one.. I hope it holds up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Trump administration has chosen the next movie to screen after ''Finding Dory''. True Lies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a Jewish canoe the safest boat to be in? It never tips! Bonus: How do you pick up a Jewish girl? With a dustpan and a broom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 00''s Kids Will Get This Jesus Christ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy meets a girl at the club and takes her home. Before going to his place the girl tells him that she can tell how a man is in bed by the way he opens the door. She tells him, "If a man struggles with the key then that means he is a sloppy lover and he is not the right one for me." The guy then stops, looks at his keys, then stares at the door. After a while of staring, he goes toward the doorknob and before inserting the key he licks the keyhole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Made me laugh more than I should have! What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?! An investigator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Apple update you don''t see coming? An iPatch... I''m sorry...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the little Ethiopian boy get for his 4th birthday? Flowers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I followed Dwayne Johnson for an hour and when he wasn''t looking I slapped his arse. He turned around and punched me in the face. That''s what happens when you hit rock bottom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do divers fall off the boat backwards?? Cuz if they fell forward they wud still be in the boat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the opposite of irony? Wrinkly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and takes a seat. He later gets arrested for petty theft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A German tank commander boasted "One Tiger can take on ten Shermans!" And an American replied "Good thing we have eleven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three men on a boat with a pack of cigarettes and no matches. How did they manage to smoke? They threw a cigarette overboard, and made the boat a cigarette lighter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump keeps calling CNN "fake" news because... it''s consistent with what Melania keeps telling him are "real" orgasms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fat girl with a rape whistle? Optimistic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Japanese man in America with $8932 and 40 cents? A Mill*yen*aire. ...Yeah I know I''m a shitbird.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump and the iPhone 7 have in common? They both think de-porting is the answer when theres no more Jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do girls like the Falcons? Because they like chokers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jobs that dont exist anymore... Steve', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Sultan leave his job at Mattress City? He was already a manager at Ottoman Empire', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a neologasm? It''s a really good neologism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ronaldo hits his head and is injured. Manager shouts ''support his head'' quick! The fans chant ''Ronaldo''s head! Ronaldo''s head!'' Manager shouts ''Call him an ambulance!'' The fans chant ''Ronaldo''s an ambulance! Ronaldo''s an ambulance!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Pair of Slippers and A Dildo Two guys are sitting around talking about what they got their wives for Valentines Day Todd : "So, what did you get your wife for Valentines day?" Mark : "I got her this BEAUTIFUL diamond ring. She shows this thing off wherever she goes. She wears it to the store, out to get the mail, to the gas station, etc. She loves it man. What about you?" Todd : "Well, I got my wife a pair of slippers and a dildo..." Mark : "What the fuck? That''s rather odd for Valentines day don''t ya think?" Todd : "Actually, it makes perfect sense. If she doesn''t like the slippers, then she can go fuck herself"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am awesome at Russian Roulette. I''ve NEVER lost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to the frog parked in a handicap spot? He go toad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first rule of The Liars Club: Tell everybody you''re in the Fight Club', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Harry Potter like to go down hills? Walking j.k. ...rowling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two inmates are caught having sex A senior and junior corrections officer are on patrol and hear two men grunting in the bathroom. They go to investigate the disturbance and find that one inmate is sodomizing the other inmate in one of the bathroom stalls. The two officers break the two inmates up. The junior officer asks where he should take the inmates and whether he should send them to box. The senior officer decides that only the inmate being sodomized should go to solitary confinement. The junior officer, clearly confused asks "why him and not the guy preforming the sodomization?" The senior officer looks at the junior officer and says "he already has his shit packed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a very angry bodybuilder psychologist He had Freud rage', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shorty! Yo'' momma is so short, I can see her feet in her driver''s license. =>#=>#=>#', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would be a great Politician... I''m really good at pissing everyone off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his coffee before it was cool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy buys a horse... When he buys the horse, the salesman says "This horse belonged to a priest, so to make it move you have to say Praise the Lord! and to make it stop you have to say hallelujah." The cowboy takes the horse for a ride. He''s riding the horse but then forgets how to stop it. When he remembers, he says "Hallelujah!" and the horse stops right at the edge of a canyon. After that he thanked God for saving him and yells "Praise the Lord!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Panda who eats, shoots, and leaves? A Pandit. (bandit) OC by BatManBenJamIn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something only 6000bc kids will get THE original OPs mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was startled by a loud fart... I was fartled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2010s Kids won''t get this A good president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only Baby Boomers will get this... The Draft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Y''know what I find odd? Whole numbers that are not divisible by 2.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frank was getting ready to go on a trip to New York for the first time, and was talking to his friend Bill. Bill: While you are in New York, there is a bar that you have to go to. When you walk through the front door, you are handed a free drink. Then you can go to the back room and get laid. Come back up to the bar, and you get another free drink. Then you can get laid again. It goes on like this all night. Frank: That sounds unbelievable. Have you really been there? Bill: No, but my sister has.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Henry VIII has trouble in school, what does he do? He hires a Tudor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell the difference between a Methodist and a Baptist? Methodist will say hi in a liquor store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wrote on my little sisters cast today "They say the lack of brain in a blonde is accounted for with brawn... Guess not"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do clams do for their birthday? They shellibrate...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('only 30''s kids will get this: The holocaust.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard about the famous italian chef that died? He pastaway, here today gone tomato,we cannoli do so much. He will be pizza history!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two soldiers are in a tank Both of them drowned Credit: from a comment by /u/KillarKittens, slightly modified', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Magic Johnson, Charlie Sheen and roughly 250,000 children in Africa have in common? A continuing chance to create a better tomorrow. You **sick** bastards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''70s kids won''t get this Measles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only African people will get this Ebola', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like i like my coffee. I fucking hate coffee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you live in a first world country..... When you''re not dead', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a cucumber and a shark attack? One is a pickle you can make, the other is a pickle you can''t escape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are fights between fictional creatures so boring? Because they always drag on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just because it''s simple, doesn''t mean it''s easy Unless we''re talking about your mom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the doctor The doctor says, "What''s wrong with you?" The man replies, "Doctor, there''s a lot of things wrong, please look me over." The doctor agrees and starts his examination. He''s only barely begun and when he tries to look in the man''s ear, he exclaims, "my God man, there''s a piece of lettuce in there!" The man sighs and says, "I know Doc, and that''s only the tip of the iceberg. "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just heard there was a cure for dyslexia. That''s like music to my arse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call sodium chloride beating someone up with Bruce Lee''s corpse? A salt with a dead Lee weapon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned a new way to stop the pot from boiling over Stick your fucking face in it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call some who kidnaps cats? A kittnapper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Chinese guy covered in iron? A Chink in the Armor OC pls no steal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re American before you go to the bathroom, and you''re American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you while you are in the bathroom? European!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only anti-vaxxers will get this... Polio', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Deaf people seem to be the best at relationships They always let their hands do the talking', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the deal with airline food? Oh wait, there is no deal because it''s overpriced when available.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi is on his deathbed... ...and a friend asks him if he has any last requests. The Rabbi asks his friend to find him a Catholic priest, so that he might convert. Confused, his friend asks, "Rabbi, why? You have been a great teacher and leader of your followers, and you have led a good and honorable Jewish life. Why would you want to become a Catholic now, before you die?" He says, "Eh, better one of them than one of us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The US have been really progressive in the last decade... In 2009 they got their first black president, and this year they got their first orange one!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only Coal Miners Will Get This Black lung disease.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The School Janitor Janitor: I know im just a school janitor, but my eldest son is in M.I.T., his younger brother in Princeton, and my youngest in Harvard. Student: (amazed) Wow, what are they studying? Janitor: Oh no, they are janitors as well.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is leaving me because of my obsession with pasta I''m feeling cannelloni right now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Linkin Park''s web developer spent hours trying to fix a byte ordering bug. He tried so hard and got so far, but in the endian it doesn''t even matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NSA.. Always listening to our customers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 1700''s sailors will get this... Scurvy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frequent browsers of /r/jokes will not get this. Laid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is improve comedy like a dead language? Because it''s Sanscript.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A world without women... ...would be a pain the ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people are into carbon dating. It''s not for me. I dated carbon once, turns out they made everything up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People want to boycott brands because of political and religious views I just want to be able to afford those brands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Reddit and Pornhub? On pornhub they down vote trash', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two brothers Two brothers are in their treehouse and they see a their neighbour undressing through her window. After seeing this the younger brother runs out the treehouse to his room. The older brother finds him and asks him what is wrong the younger brother says: "Mum said if I see that then I''ll turn to stone. I''m already feeling something turn hard."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my soda like I like my women Flat and room temperature.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar And sees 3 pieces of meat hanging from the ceiling. The guy asks, Whats this about? The bartender replies, Well, if you can jump up and slap the meat, you get free drinks for the rest of the night. If you miss, you pay for everyones drinks for the next hour. You wanna do it? The guy replies, Nah, the steaks are too high.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the sperm cross the road? Because you put on the wrong sock this morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dave drowned So at the funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt. Well, it''s what he would have wanted. - Gary Delaney, 2010', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just got my first BMW! Which tires are best for splashing puddles at cyclists and pedestrians?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An evil mathematician makes a plan to multiply binomials It was FOILed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('if your phone is damaged place it in a bowl of rice this will attract Asians who will fix your phone. if no Asians can be attracted with rice try uranium', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a word I just made up? Plagiarism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the funniest pepper? A jajajajajalapeo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dont know how to say the word GIF? Just prounounce the G how its pronounced in gigantic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Welcome to Atlanta where the players play. For two and a half quarters then get blown away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is short, how bout a blowjob? You might not think it''s funny, but my wife found it hilarious.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Da Bomb Guy 1: You da bomb Guy 2: No, you da bomb In America: a compliment. In the Middle East: an argument', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the lawyer name his daughter? Sue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ned Stark''s death was foretold in his daughter''s name Because when he died, she was sans a Stark', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a beehive without an exit? Unbelievable', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy at a bar says to the bartender, "Hey jackass! Get me a beer." The bartender turns around, stares at the guy for a second, and proceeds to serve him a beer. The bartender walks to the other end of the bar, and another guy says "Hey, come on man. Don''t let that jerk treat you that way." The bartender just shrugs and quietly walks away. A few minutes later, once again, the guy shouts "Hey jackass! Get me another beer!" Of course, the bartender obliges and serves him a beer. The other guy says "Look man, you can''t let that guy do that to you. Stand up for yourself! Do you hear what he''s calling you?" This time, the bartender replies, "Oh, that guy? HEE-HAW HEE-HAW HE ALWAYS calls me that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Donald Trump and Aaron Burr? Trump *doesn''t* want to be in the room where it happens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is like a diamond. I don''t have a diamond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If flossing is a pain in the ass you are doing it at the wrong end', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the name of the Greek hero who couldn''t stop swaying from side to side? Oscillates I''m not even going to apologise for this one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fun fact: Betsy Devos'' name contains every letter of the alphabet that she knows of.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, am I dying? "Doctor, am I dying? I hurt all over, I can''t sleep at night, and I have trouble staying conscious" Doctor: Nope, you''re just a college student.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the titanic? About halfway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If two vegans are fighting... ...is it still called a beef?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had dinner with Bernie Sanders and a couple of his staffers last night And when the bill came and nobody reached for it, I eventually took it and paid for it in full plus tip. On our way out Bernie was very happy and exclaimed "That was a great meal, and to think, it was provided to us at no cost!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a Nazi mine A worker calls out to Hitler: "Sir, we are mining too many useless Ores" [Hitler rubs his chin, contemplating] "So mine less" [Grammar Nazi chimes in, from above] "MINE FEWER" [Hitler looks up] "Yes?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recruitment lady on phone - Sir I have two openings for you.. Me - Yes, I know. (Long silence) Her - asshole Me - prefer the other one...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ordered some flowers for my wife from 1800Flowers... Now what is she going to do with a truckload of roses?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mute Child The little kid never said a word, never uttered a syllable his entire life. Parents took him to doctor after doctor - each doctor said "I have no idea why he can''t talk, I can''t find any reason for him to remain silent". So the parents finally gave up and accepted their boy couldn''t speak and as time passed their son got older. The boy had turned twelve and one morning at the breakfast table he suddenly said in a loud voice "**these pancakes taste like shit**. Well, his mom was shocked and dropped the dishes she had in hand. She looked at him and exclaimed "Little Bobby - YOU CAN TALK?!?!", and the boy replied "yeah". She was quiet for a moment as the realization sunk in, and then asked "well, why haven''t you said anything your whole life up until now?". -- He said "everything has been fine ''til now".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three nuns were sitting on a park bench when a flasher walks by The first nun, well, she had a stroke. The second nun, why, she also had a stroke. The third nun didn''t touch it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t usually brag..... I don''t usually brag about my finances, but my credit card company calls me almost every day to tell me my balance is outstanding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you add yeast to soup? A souprise', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My ex always used to annoy me by saying I have terrible aim for a hitman. I miss her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The paranormal community is in an uproar over a recent surge in "black ghost" sightings only near sources of light Despite proof these are shadows, no one knows what (or who) these entities are.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1989 Alaskan Wild life will get this... Oil', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 50,000 BC kids will get this Ugga: Ung bung uhh mang Bunga tankun ung Bunga: Nanga uhh ung tangung uhh...unganun Ugga: Inga Bunga langa ung ugg Ugga? Bunga: Ung bunga uhh tangung angu OOK OOOOOK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican word of the day.. The Mexican word of the day is cashew. Like I''ll cashew outside, how bout dat?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a native american who''s balding? A patchy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can circumsized men ride bikes on the sidewalk? ..or do you have to be a complete dick..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in the 70''s you could hold out your hand and a car would pick you up and take you where you need.... Today we call that child abduction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard the sperm bank gives $50 for your sperm. I have a sock in my room worth $3000.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother-in-law fell in a wishing well. I didn''t know they worked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A set of jumper cables walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I''ll serve you, but don''t start anything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then *poof* & he disappeared without a tres!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Donald Trump''s favorite operating system? Windows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to jail after dropping the soap. I mean gel, learned my lesson the first time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How tall is Betsy DeVos? We don''t know, she can''t measure growth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a bee say when it returns to it''s hive? Honey, I''m home!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The awards ceremony at the dog show went horribly wrong. The trophy maker had a grudge against the show. To shame them, the 6 foot trophy was of a feline''s behind instead of a pedigree dog. Showrunners and dog owners called the event a "Catastrophe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend said she wanted to try and get rid of her "love handles". I told her she would look stupid without any ears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what is cows favorite video sharing website MOOtube', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between your friends and an asshole? I don''t stab my asshole when it talks shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish family? Zero.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do midgets always laugh when they play soccer? Because the grass tickles their balls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the American president when he''s taking his prescription hair-loss medication? ...IM-P.O.T.U.S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overheard at the Gynecologist Office: A blonde, a brunette & red head are waiting to be seen at the Gynecologist office. All three are pregnant. They start talking to eachother about their babies. Brunette: I''m going to have a boy because I was on top during sex. Redhead: Well, I was on the bottom during sex so I''m having a girl. Blonde: Oh my God! I''m going to have puppies!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to a recent study, men on dating sites are more popular if they mention dancing or cooking. Because if theres one thing women love, its a man who can lie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend said she dosent want to be with me anymore I was very suprised that my right hand can talk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Deaf people seem tough to me Because they always let their fists do the talking', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your pitbull loves you when... You wake up with all your limbs intact.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four rappers are asked to think of a word that rhymes with orange Eminem: Door hinge Lil Wayne: nigga Chris brown: orange Lil b: bicycle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend started annoying me with fowl bird puns But toucan play at that game', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks the class to use a sentence with the words defense and defeat. The Mexican rasies his hand and says, "I jumped dee fence with dee feet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Vladimir Putin wanted to poison a Mexican political enemy, would he use pollonium... Or would he be too chicken?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s an insider tip that will save you thousands on your next vacation. Don''t go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t trust anyone with a conspiracy theory, man. I think they are all up to something.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the binary computer cross the road? 01010100 01101111 00100000 01100111 01100101 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01101111 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110011 01101001 01100100 01100101', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A piece of string walks into a bar... "Hi, I''d like to be served please." Says the string. "We cannot serve you, as you are only a string." Said the bartender. Upset, the string comes out of the bar, tears apart his ends, and walks back inside. "Hi, I''d like to be served please." Says the string. "Aren''t you just the string I said I won''t serve?" The bartender asks. The string says "Nope, I''m a frayed knot!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cow go to the gym? To work on his calves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is a real asset to the country! Fucking Siri! I said *Ass Hat* not *Asset*!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes when I turn off the lights and masturbate, it feels like Jesus is watching me. Mexican prison is shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a neckbeard get when he''s sick A malady.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('American healthcare be like Ooh no insurance? Bad news you owe $500 I am so sorry! Oh you have insurance! Great news, in that case bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit but fortunately all you would owe is only $700 for deductible and copay!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate housework. You do the dishes and you do the washing. Then six months later you have to start again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife was ecstatic that she was going to have twins... ....being the superstitious woman she is, she went to a fortune teller to see her children''s fortunes. Fortune Teller: "I have great news, and greater news! You see, one child is going to be a very good professional Football player! Your other child, will be an extremely famous musician!" The wife is amazed, and cannot WAIT to tell her husband the news. She gets home, and tells her husband. Yet, she doesn''t get the reaction she had hoped for. The husband goes: "WHAT?!? No child of mine will EVER be a musician!" The husband picks up the nearest lamp, and chucks it towards his wife''s belly. The lamp hit the stomach and shattered. Suddenly, a soft beat was playing from somewhere. A face presses against the mothers stomach and starts.. "*Bum bum bum bum* you hit my brotha but you didn''t hit me! Bum bum bum bum"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took my wife out the other day. What a great shot it was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I built a Rollercoaster park but it''s not as good as a lot of others It definitely has its ups and downs thiugh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('daughter prayer A family was having guests to dinner. At the table, the mother turned to her six-year-old daughter and says, "Dear, would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn''t know what to say," replies the little girl. "Just say what you hear Mommy say, sweetie." Her daughter takes a deep breath, bows her head, and solemnly says, "Dear Lord, why the hell did I invite all these people to dinner?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you never trust harp players? They''re always pulling strings', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a conservative and a liberal walk into a bar. The bartender says, "it''s malt liquor night, in honor of black history month. Can I get you a 40?" The liberal says "sure that sounds all right." The conservative says "no thanks I''m alt-right."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('90s kids won''t get this either Jobs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish are in a tank... Suddenly, one turns to the other and says: "Do you know how to drive this thing?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does one think the unthinkable with an itheberg', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('whats the saddest story called? my wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a hockey player and a hippy? The hockey player showers after three periods.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate captain walks into a bar... ...with a peg leg, a steering wheel hanging from his pants, and a parrot on his shoulder. Bartender: "Excuse me Captain, but you have a steering wheel hanging from your pants!" Pirate: "Arrrrr, I know. It''s driving me nuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a fine line between numerator and denominator but only a fraction of people will get the joke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the joke of the bathroom? I didn''t either; the door was closed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into an online forum.. A man walks into an online forum and tells a joke that nobody really understands. Get it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a fish on the line? You call him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Timmy go during the explosion? **EVERYWHERE**. He had a newfound respect for life after being spared from such a life-changing event. He went to Arizona, Colorado, New York, England, then settled down in Paris with his now-engaged girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son is nearly 21 years old, but he still gets pampered. He says he''s ready for big boy undies, but I''m not sure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jim and Trish are both mental patients. One day Jim jumps into the swimming pool but, doesn''t come up for air. Quick as a flash, Trish sees her friend in trouble, so dives in and pulls him out. Later, the hospital director calls Trish into his office and says ''Trish, Ive got some good news and some bad news. The good news is, we are releasing you as you are obviously sane ''saving anothers life''. But unfortunately, the bad news is that Jim hanged himself in the bathroom ...'' ''Oh no'' Trish replies, ''that''s where I put him to dry !''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Betsy DeVos and a Grizzly Bear? Betsy DeVos is an actual threat to school children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am a serial monogomist I am loyal to my cornflakes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''90s kids won''t get this (cont.) Measles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone loves to talk about how much they support people with mental illness, but they never follow through when I ask them for help Then they''re all like "oh my god" and "calm down" and "sir this is the produce isle please stop crying into the cabbage"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, violets are blue. If he''s busy on Valentines Day... ...the side chick is you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my coffee black and without crackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump calls the media ''fake news'' even when they''re directly quoting something he said/tweeted... ...but since most of the things he says are fake, by transitive property, the news is fake too', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doctor gave me 6 months to live. So I shot him. The judge gave me 20 years. Problem solved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was younger, I really wanted a skateboard but my parents couldn''t afford one; so one morning, I woke up early and went to the garage, I got some wood and some nails& and beat my parents to death. My foster parents bought me 5 skateboards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I searched up why incest porn has become so popular this year. Apparently Alabama just recently got internet connection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking: Betsy DeVos has cancelled.... the subject-verb agreement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do traffic lights and liberals have in common? They stop you turning right.. even though its safe to do so. *And Im sure theres more& please feel free to add !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the wife of a hippy? Mississippi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 1300''s kids will get this.. The Black Plague', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This 60 year old woman was walking along 5th Avenue when she heard a voice from above "You will live to be 100." This 60 year old woman was walking along 5th Avenue when she heard a voice from above "You will live to be 100." She looked around and didn''t see anyone. Again she heard "You will live to be 100." Boy, she thought to herself, that was the voice of God. I''ve got 40 more years to live! So off she went to the plastic surgeon. She got everything fixed from head to toe. When she left the plastic surgeon''s office, she got hit by a bus,died, and went up to heaven. She said to God "You told me I would live to be 100. I was supposed to have had 40 more years. So how come you let the bus kill me?". God said: "I didn''t recognize you".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde A blonde goes to a restaurant, buys a coffee and sits down to drink it. She looks on the side of her cup and she finds a peel-off prize. She pull off the tab and yells, "I WON! I WON! I WON a motor home; I WON a motor home!" The waitress runs over and says, "That''s impossible. The biggest prize given away was a mini van!" The blonde replies, "No. I WON A motor home, I WON a motor home!" By this time the manager makes his way over to the table and says, "You couldn''t possibly have won a motor home because we didn''t have that as a prize!" Again the blonde says, "No, no mistake, I WON a motor home, I WON a motor home!" The blonde hands the prize ticket to the manager and he reads, "WIN A BAGEL."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Subreddits appreciating something usually have one of two titles: Xisbeautiful(r/dataisbeautiful) or Xporn(r/earthporn) Let''s just say that r/internetisbeautiful would have a lot more subscribers if they chose the latter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does your Mum like chicken? No? I bet your Nando''s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When God closes a door He opens a window. THAT''S WHY IT''S SO FUCKING COLD IN HERE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a food that used to be enjoyed by the poor, but is now eaten by the wealthy elite? Gentrifried rice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('!false It''s funny because it''s true.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This morning I woke up to a blow job. Oh wait, my job blows every morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have genetically modified a Venus Fly Trap to have the skin of a cactus They say its bark is worse than its bite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boob, a vagina and an asshole walk into a bar... A boob, a vagina and an asshole walk into a bar and they start debating on who is the greatest of the three of them! Boob - "I give milk to new born babies and I''m attractive to the opposite sex, that''s why I am the greatest!" Vagina - "That''s nothing, I give birth to new born and can accommodate the opposite sex, that''s why I am the greatest!" . . . . . . . . . . Why are you scrolling down? It''s your turn to speak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one drunk muslim say to another? I''m drunk Ash-faq', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you disagree with someone, it is always better to walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you''ll be a mile away from them. And you''ll have their shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Was hit by a rental car earlier today... It still Hertz.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What the best way to get anybody''s pussy wet? Drop their cat in a pool', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the grape say when it got squashed? Nothing; it just let out a little wine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of weather is the most offensive? Darude - Sandstorm', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That awkward moment when you realise your new ''promotion'' involves less power, less money, and less influence.# -DJT', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Ferrari and 3 dead babies... I don''t have a Ferrari in my garage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Got sacked from my drug counselling job just because they didn''t like my motto. ''It''s my way or the highway''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a wolfs favorite puzzle? AWOOObix cube!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an illegal immigrant fighting a child rapist? Alien vs Predator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake, Ryan Gosling. Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake, Ryan Gosling. Shit. I guess I do have an obsession with Britney''s peers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is the type of guy who will look you square in the eye and shake your hand like a man. While taking a piss on your boots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear and a rabbit were taking a shit in the woods The bear turned around and asked the rabbit, "do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?" "No" the rabbit replied. So the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one rad say to the other rad? "arrrr matey!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man describes his dreams to the psychiatrist. Man - "Last night I dreamed that I was a teepee. The night before I dreamed that I was a yurt. What does it mean?" Psychiatrist - "You''re two tents."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows are standing in a field. *The first cow says*: did you hear about that "mad cow disease" that''s going around? That sounds pretty terrible. *The second cow says*: yeah, it does. Good thing us chickens don''t have to worry about that!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Martelleus Bennett is refusing to meat with Donald Trump. Yeah, he''s a real Patriot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GoT joke: What do you call a Dothraki who does jumping jacks every morning? Khal Isthenics.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The restaurant Hooters is known for two things... ...boobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks a girl to prom.., ..and she says yes. Overexcited, he is told he must show up with a limo and a tuxedo. So he goes to the limo rental and waits in the limo line, and he gets the limo. Then, he goes to the tuxedo rental and waits in the tuxedo line. Finally, the big day comes, and he brings his date to prom. She asks him to get some punch. He goes over to get some punch, and realizes there is no punch line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a mathematician solve their constipation? They work it out with a pencil', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the music award show in Canada called the Junos? Because everytime someone wins, everyone goes "Juno who that is?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to have diarrhea ...but then I got my shit together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you have a date for Valentine''s Day? Yes February 14th.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did gravity and magnetism hook up? We don''t fully know, but there were definitely forces of attraction at work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a couple that was married 50 years They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the man said to his wife, "Just think, honey, we''ve been married for 50 years." "Yeah," she replied, "Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together." "I know," the man said, "We were probably sitting here naked as jaybirds fifty years ago." "Well," she snickered, "What do you say...should we get naked?" Where upon the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table. "You know, honey," the lady breathlessly replied, "My nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago." "I wouldn''t be surprised," replied Gramps. "One''s in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('....so then my wife told me to run out and get her some Head & Shoulders "......nevertheless, this court still finds you guilty Mr. Dahmer"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do hummingbirds hum? They forgot the lyrics', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Andy has 150 candy bars. He eats 125. What does Andy have now? Andy has diabetes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did a scientist install a door knocker? coz he wanted to win a no-bell prize!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you teach someone to make an omelette? Show them an eggsample', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve never understood giving flowers to someone on Valentine''s Day. "Here''s a dying plant... because i love you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would call Donald Trump a cunt but he lacks both depth and warmth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I Heard Facebook has got a new fake news filter. All I wanna know is when they''re gonna get the real one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Betsy Devos and Jared from Subway have in common? Both of their main goal is to fuck children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about all the missing women in the area? No? Thats good then...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two employees are standing next to a water cooler talking... One says to the other "Yaknow, our boss says we should be extraordinary but he''s average in more ways than one" "Yeah," says the other "you could say he''s a double standard!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex with no strings attached? Don''t shag a puppet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best thing about Betsy DeVos being nominated as the head of department of education ... is the fact they are abolishing it completely.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think my cellmate was gay last time I went to jail His dick tasted like shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What piece of sporting equipment is best for provoking a debate? Discus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people just have a way with words and other people & oh & not have way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stranger: "I''ve got no friends." Me: "You''re not alone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prison sex... It''s con-sensual.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do cows produce during an earthquake? MILKSHAKE!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two whales walk into a bar.... The first one says: "AOOOOOUUUUUOOOUUUUGGGAAAAUUUOOOOOOOOOOAAAAGOOOOGGGGUUUUUAAAAAAAAA" The second one says: " Go home steve, your drunk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('August 6, 1945 Hiroshima The day Rice Krispies were invented.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was U2''s lawyer''s hourly rate? Nothing, he was pro-Bono', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was reading a book about paint today and I just burst into tears I was overcome by emulsion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did O say to Q? Put that thing away, there are kids here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Betsy DeVos''s school funding plan... You start with $0. But if you sign up 5 kids for school, and those kids sign up 5 more kids, and THOSE kids sign up 5 more kids...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two balloons were flying in the desert... ... and one of them said: "Be careful, there''s a cactusssssssssssssssssssssssss".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a super model with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never date a tennis player Love means nothing to them - Matt Winning, 2015', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Boy Scout and a guy who fixes bicycle horns? One''s motto is ''Be Prepared'', the other''s is ''Beep Repaired'' EDIT:I reached r/all, I promised a friend of mine that I would stop calling his mom hot if I reached all. He sends his regards...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love hyperbole It is literally the best thing ever!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is like the square root of -100... A perfect 10, but completely imaginary', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So Queen of Englad was bored and summoned an American, a frenchman and a russian... They gather at the palace. The queen says: "Bring me your greatest weapon!". And so they went and came back. The frenchman brought a pistol, the american - an assault rifle while the russian is nowhere to be seen. The queen got tired of waiting and said the rest: " now take those weapons and shove them up your arse!" The frechman takes the pistol and shoves it up no problem, didnt feel a thing The american is stuffing the rifle as hard as he can and keeps crying and laughing, crying and laughing The queen asks:" why are you alternating between crying laughing?" The american answers:" I''m crying because this hurts, jesus fucking christ. I''m laughing because the russian is driving over here with a fucking tank" edit: forgot some words', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which hand do you use to stir your coffee? "My right?" "How original, I use a spoon"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you stop a mole from digging? Take his shovel away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Donald Trump''s spirit animal? The wall-rus. Yes, I do hate myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Never mind, it''s an obscure number you probably haven''t even heard of before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My American Car... was Made in Mexico. My Japanese car was Made in America.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Nun and the Uber Driver One night, an Uber driver picked up a nun. While he was driving, the driver started to laugh insanely. "Why are you laughing?" asked the Nun "Oh it''s nothing." said the Uber driver "No really" said the Nun, "I won''t mind" So the driver told her, "Well, it''s really silly but I''ve always had this fantasy of having a blowjob from a nun" "Well then, what''s your name?" the nun enquired. "Robert" "Are you married?" "No" "Are you Catholic?" "Yes" "Then pull into the alley way" The driver was so stunned he didn''t want to give up this chance so he pulled into the alley, when they were finalised they returned to the car. While driving, "Robert" started to cry. "Why are you crying?" asked the nun. "I''m sorry, I lied" "How so?" "Well my name is Daniel. I have a wife and three kids and I''m Jewish." "Well, I''ve done a bit of lying too" the Nun grinned "My name is Simon and I''m going to a costume party"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can only mourn something viewed with my own two eyes... As they say, seeing is bereaving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People think I''m a pervert... People think I''m a pervert because I sleep with a 9 year old. But you have to remember, dog years are 7 times longer than ours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my wife walked into the room while I was having sex with my daughter...... I wasn''t sure what she was more freaked out by, the fact that I was fucking our daughter, or that the abortion clinic gave me the fetus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the ginger bread man walk? Because he had crummy legs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trumps favourite joke. What do sharks and people have in common? The only great ones are white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two teenagers snuck into a crypt at night. One tripped over a small bone and the other unashamedly laughed. Can''t blame him though, it was a little humerus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frank the Human Cannonball retired yesterday and has yet to be replaced... The circus owner said, "It''s hard to find another man of that caliber."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nintendo, don''t be a Valve Make Luigi''s Mansion 3!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I get paranoid when I smoke Sometimes I get paranoid when I smoke, like last time I got so high I convinced myself my girlfriend was sleeping with my bestfriend. Luckily for me though it was only my second best friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy dies and wakes up on a beach. Nice weather, hot girls playing beach volleyball, barbeques everywhere, laughter and joy. All of a sudden, Satan comes up to him. "Welcome to hell. Enjoy yourself, have a drink, have a hamburger and check out the area. If you need anything or have a question, feel free to ask me." he says. The guy walks along the beach, has a few drinks with a nice girl. He walks over a hill, when he sees a hole in the ground, full with tormented people, flames rising up from the hole. The guy runs towards the beach until he finds Satan. "Hey, I found this hole and all these people are being tormented... Whats that about?" "Oh," Satan says, "thats for the Christians, they want it that way."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I lead a pretty rock n roll lifestyle I wake up stoned and roll out of bed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scientologist lived alone with his dog for company. When his dog died he asked the Scientologist Minister if he would have a funeral service for his dear dog. The Minister replied "we can''t have funeral services for dogs in the church of Scientology, but the baptists might say something for your dog" The man said "thank you Minister, do you think $5,000 would be enough to donate to them for the service?" The Minister replied "Oh dear me, why didn''t you say the dog was a Scientologist"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Theres that moment when you put your steak on the grill and your mouth waters all over from that amazing smell. Do you vegans feel the same when you mow the grass?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pakistani breakup line Boy to Girl: It''s not you, it''s my goat !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A buddy of mine got sent to jail A buddy of mine got sent to jail and completely lost his shit as soon as he got there. 30-seconds in, he punched another guy, that guy went down, and a huge fight broke out. There was a lot of blood, a lot of swearing, and the whole time my buddy was just swinging wildly and shouting absolute nonsense. We don''t play Monopoly together anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ren Descartes walks into a bar.... The bartender asks if he''d like a beer. "I think not." and he promptly vanished from existence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When life hands you lemons.....Make lemonade Then, find someone for whom life has handed them Vodka....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Sanders/Cruz debate was really weird It was like peeking into an alternate dimension where both parties had hindsight', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? One to screw it in. One to excoriate men for creating the need for illumination. One to blame men for inventing such a faulty means of illumination. One to suggest the whole screwing bit to be too rape-like. One to deconstruct the lightbulb itself as being phallic. One to blame men for not changing the bulb. One to blame men for trying to change the bulb instead of letting a woman do it. One to blame men for creating a society that discourages women from changing light bulbs. One to blame men for creating a society where women change too many light bulbs. One to advocate that light bulb changers should have wage parity with electricians. One to alert the media that women are now out-lightbulbing men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old farmer wrote a letter to his innocent son in prison: "This year I''m unable to plant potatoes because I can''t dig the ground. I know if you were here you would''ve helped me." His son replied: "You idiot, don''t dig the ground, I have hidden guns there." Pretty soon, the Police read the letter, and the very next day the ground was dug by the police, and searched for guns but nothing was found. The son wrote again: "Now plant your potatoes dad, its the best I could do from here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the mathematician overweight? Because he ate three squared meals a day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the tallest building in the world? A library, cause it has so many stories', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Phish concerts have the best drugs? Because if you''re not tripping ballsack you''ll realize you paid 45 bucks to listen to cheese eating Vermontians tune their instruments for 6 fucking hours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? STUPID.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn''t much, but the reception was excellent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Robocop say to the criminal he''s fucking to death? "Dead or alive, you''re coming with me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the hardest part when telling a gay joke? Keeping a straight face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw my first coloured movie today One guy was half black and half white and another guy was half white and half black', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Marxists good at hiding? Commieflage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Crazy times. Republicans silenced Elizabeth Warren. Do you know what kind of power that takes? To silence the world''s loudest woman?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The dentist told me I need a crown. I''m like, "I know, right?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A prominent art collector quits the Cabinet immediately after his confirmation He had stumbled into the wrong auction', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING to all in the North Side of Chicago, there is a scam taking place! A scam is being pulled, mainly on older men. What happens is that when you stop for a red light, a young nude woman comes up and pretends to be washing your windshield. While she is doing this, another person opens your back door and steals anything in the car. They are very good at this: They got me 7 times Friday and 5 times Saturday. I wasn''t able to find them on Sunday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I screamed my crushes name while having sex with my girlfriend But she didn''t care ''cause Mercy isn''t our safeword.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a Hells Angel with a Jehovah''s witness? They come to your door and tell you to fuck off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Japanese sake bars and doctors in Oregon? One of them serves adults in Asia...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When do people have unhappy bowel movements? On sad-turd-days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a quarterback discipline his kids? Intentional Grounding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t squirrels mate in the summer? Because they''re storing their nuts for the winter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bin Laden said it was ok to masterbate.... I guess they should have called themselves the Tali-whackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chlorine texts potassium, asking to borrow an electron. Potassium replies, "K"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s 2018. A student insults his teacher, "without us, you wouldn''t have a job!" The teacher looks him in the eye, and says "without your parents'' money, you wouldn''t have a teacher"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''90s kids won''t get this Social security', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky How much do you love your kids?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Republican senator and a prostitute? A prostitute takes your money to fuck you. A Republican senator collects money from someone else and then fucks your children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I posted "In the end, I hope Trump is just a bump in the road and we go on about our business" Was answered "yeah, in that case, the line of cars waiting their turn will stretch to the horizon"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is there no such thing as a drug sniffing dog ? Because the dog will high at training', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Bunny say to the Carrot? I''m going to eat you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Justin Bieber haters, please respect him I owe him my life. Last year August, i had been in a coma for 6 months. Then one day my nurse turned on the radio to his songs. So i woke up and turned it off..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t women fart? They can''t keep their mouths shut long enough to build up any pressure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do guys snore when they sleep on their back Their balls fall over their asshole and the air has nowhere else to go', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My husband almost gave me a heart attack when he said "I like my men like I like my coffee...." "and I fucking hate coffee."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The rancher had 196 cows But when he rounded them up he had 200', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t believe they are still together after all those years of shit Who? My butt cheeks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does anybody know how to get rid of smelly feet? Asking for a foot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbors caught me watching them have sex through their bedroom window and told my parents. My dad made me apologize and told the couple I was normally above that type of behavior. I took the advice and started watching through the skylight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just found a hat with a hundred pound in it!!! The guy playing the guitar was well jealous that he never noticed it first! Chased me all the way down the street.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL Abraham Lincoln is the only president that cannot be convicted of a crime Because he''s innocent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if you miss your mother-in-law? Reload. (Thanks Bob Dylan via Theme Time Radio Hour)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend asked me what my sex life has been like in the past..... I said it was like the Bowling Green Massacre :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Unemployment at its best! An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a frog and a horny toad? Frog said ribbit ribbit. The horny toad said rubbit rubbit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop passes out some joints as part of a drug education program A school police officer passes out 3 joints to the teenagers in the classroom. He tells them that if he doesn''t get them all back, he''s putting the whole school into lock down and searching everyone. When he collects the weed, he only get 2 joints. Before he starts searching everyone, someone comes up with the weed. Another kid looks like he''s about to say something, but puts his hands back in his pockets and looks around nervously.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Spanish people call their young Jewish friends? Amigos Menorahs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Princess Kate and Osama bin Laden have in common? They both had their back doors blown out by a guy in the navy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was woken up at 5am by a crow... It just wouldn''t stop cawing. After an hour I felt like shooting the damned thing! Then another crow joined it and they started to have a jolly old conversation. I wanted to blow both their heads off! One more crow and there definitely would''ve been a murder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson were going camping. They set up their tent, started a campfire, and laid down their sleeping bags inside of the tent. After a few hours of playing cards and joking by the fire, they extinguished the fire and went to sleep. Holmes awoke Watson in the middle of the night and they looked up at the starry night sky. "Watson, look at the sky, what do you see?" "I see thousands of shining stars, and it''s hard to believe how many millions of billions of miles away they are from us." replied Watson. "And what is else can you infer?" said Holmes. "Well, if our sun is just a mere star among trillions, then we can safely assume there are billions of planets out there, and planets like Earth. And then life in the cosmos is a possibility." "Watson, you dumbass, someone stole our tent." Edit: saw this on a tumblr post and couldn''t find it, rewrote it and full credit goes to OP of that post.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog kennel in San Francisco? Luxury apartments', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No means "NO"!..... Unless she''s dyslexic, then **it''s ON!**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man approached Captain Von Trap and said, "No offense, but is that short haired blonde single?" "Nun taken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tough, old cowboy walks into a bar with a gun in his holster... He trips upon entering the bar and his gun fires, with the bullet hitting him in the foot. His big toe is taken off, laying on the floor in a pool of blood. The cowboy limps up to the bar and asks for a shot of whiskey. The bartender stares at him and says, "You just shot yourself in the foot, go to a doctor!" The cowboy looks at him and says, "Give me some whiskey, and quit being lacktoes intolerant!" Edit: spelling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop goes up to the window of a car he''s just pulled over Cop: "Any drugs or alcohol today?" Man: "No but I vape" Cop: "Look pal, I don''t give a shit if you''re gay, just answer the question."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to start an online bakery. But I accidentally deleted all my cookies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just spawned in and instantly died... But isn''t that how abortion works?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What comes after 69? Listerine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross a Rottweiler and a Labrador? A dog that scares the shit out of you then runs away with the toilet roll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna get a pizza and fuck? Guy: Hey, wanna get a pizza and fuck? Girl: No. Guy: What? You don''t like pizza.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Make your Betsy DeVos jokes soon.. While people can still read', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My buddy and I both have the flu. I invited him over for Netflix & chills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should women stop having children after 35? Because 36 is too many', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is driving a Ford truck similar to visiting Thailand? Either way, you''re likely to blow a tranny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you cited something from Reddit... I guess you could call it Creddit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The trampoline used to be called a jumpoline. They changed the name to Tramponline when my Mother in law got one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows are eating grass in a field The first turns to the second and says "Moooooo" The second turns to the first and says "I was just about to say that"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A feminist got mad because I said boys and girls instead of girls and boys I asked what''s it matter, I always cum first', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You snooze, you lose. -Competitive insomniacs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between meeting me in a bar and meeting Bill Cosby in a bar? You''ll remember meeting me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Phone Call I was in the public toilets and had just sat down, a voice from the next cubicle said Hi!, how are you? Embarrassed, I said, Im doing fine. The voice said So what are you up to?. I said, Just doing the same as you, sitting here!. From next door, Can I come over?. Annoyed, I said, rather busy right now. The voice said, Listen, i will have to call you back, theres an idiot next door answering all my questions..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Lebron and a gigolo have in common? They''ve both got a rim-job to do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tobacco companies kill their best customers And condom companies kill their future customers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many people are asking me who I think will win the boxing match between Chris Brown and Soulja Boy, but Chris is the obvious choice as far as I''m concerned. After all I''ve seen his handiwork years ago and it''s not too shabby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend asked me to stop singing Wonderwall I said maybe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young morticians apprentice crashes through the door of his mentors office and says excitedly: "Hey Monty! You gotta check out this lady that just came in." Monty slowly gets up from his chair. "You know Mike, there isn''t much I haven''t seen. A lot of bodies have come through these doors." "Yeah, but have you ever seen a chick with a shrimp in her pussy?" Monty is intrigued. He follows Mike out to the stainless steel table and looks at the cold, naked body of a young woman. The young apprentice points triumphantly at his find. "Mike, you''ll be disappointed to hear that this is not a shrimp, but is actually this woman''s clitoris." Mike furrows his brow and looks first unsure, then embarrassed. "Well jeez Monty, it sure tasted like shrimp."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found the simplest, best way to shave You have to use Occam''s Razor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told the Subway sandwich lady not to forget my pickle. It was a big dill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for Pooh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say that cows kill more people than airplane crashes... It''s true, my ex once chased me with a knife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fight Club is the best bromance movie that never happened!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Trump, did you know Beethoven was deaf? Trump: And how was he able to make all those movies?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a magical dog? Labracadabrador', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9/11 wasn''t an inside job because all the employees jumped outside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Early one morning a son goes up to his dad and asks "What''s the difference between a cunt and a pussy?" Looking a little surprised the dad goes "Come with me and I''ll show you" Takes him into his mothers bedroom where she still sleeps and lifts up the sheets. Dad : you see that, that''s a pussy Son: can I touch it? Dad: fuck no, you''ll wake the cunt up My uncles told me this.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the vulture kicked off of the airplane? Because he ate a passenger''s carrion!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I totally blew it with my new girlfriend That''s how it goes with inflatable partners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a well dressed man on a bike and a badly dressed man on a unicycle? Attire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do penguins do in a race? They peng-win', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Betsy Devos and the Catholic Church have in common? They may help some, but it''s mostly just a bunch of kids getting fucked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was suffering from short term memory loss But then I found my ram.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cannon that can''t fire properly? Projectile Dysfunction. I''ll see myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My math teacher called me average... How mean', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the dyslexic cow say? oom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an encyclopedia and a Republican senator? The encyclopedia has a spine. (Apologies to Senators Collins and Murkowski)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Muslim say to Castro''s gay lover? "Stop, you are Infidel!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you and the universe have in common? You both started with a Big Bang. (I''ve known this joke for a longtime and I don''t remember if I made it)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call interracial Game of Thrones porn? Taking the black', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks up to the pearly gates Saint Peter asks, "How did you get here?" The mans answers, "Flu."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher asks class: "use the word Dandelion in a sentence" Teacher asks class: "use the word Dandelion in a sentence" Jamaican student: "the cheetah is faster dandelion" *Everyone dies*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Bin Laden', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of berry can you drink out of? A strawberry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a heavy trash can that tips things over? A bin Laden.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of ducks quacking at once in a disorderly fashion? Quack-aphony', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Donald Trump blush? He saw the climate changing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad told me to wipe my computer before I sell it. I said, "Why?" He said, "Because there''s cum all over it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to take a Chinese cooking class. But looking into it, it seemed like too much wok.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a brothel... A guy walks into a brothel and says to the madam, "I want the worst sex in the place. If she''s miserable, I want her". The madam asks, "Are you crazy sir"? "No" replies the guy "Just homesick".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Toilet bowls .... should be higher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently I''m allergic to Burt''s Bees body wash Broke out in hives', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This year I got my Valentines Day cards mixed up. My girlfriend thinks I love her and my wife thinks I want to fuck her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many citrus fruits does it take to kill a pirate? None.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a large body of water that''s salty and filled with promiscuous women? The Hoecean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 Vegans arrive on an Arabian shore They debate wether or to pretend they aren''t vegan. The villagers come and welcome them, they offer food and water. The first one says he''s vegan and that he can''t eat meat. The villagers eagerly give him hummus and falafel. They ask the second one if he is vegan as well. He says that it''s fine, he''ll eat anything, expecting to be sharing the meal with his friend. Villagers: Perfect! Happy Eid! Come help us get a goat, you will eat a big meal with us tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the dentist''s accountant get arrested? Incisor''s trading.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Falcons Fans (a bit late but...) Falcons fans be like #Notmysuperbowl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ah, I''ll have get back to you on that one...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the fighter jet go to the doctors office? Because it had ejectile dysfunction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re finally cracking down on Instagram pages that promote white-supremacy... or as I like to call them: gram-crackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said, "When I die, I want everyone at my funeral to be happy, not sad and depressed." I said, "Don''t worry. They will be."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend asked me if I''d ever been in a fight and I told her that I hadn''t. "You''re a pussy," she said. "I once sent a guy to hospital." I said, "We''re talking about fighting, not cooking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is doing something that no one, in the history of democracy, is known to have done before: He''s demanding a recount after he *won* the election.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guys, the book of Revelation is finally coming true, if you don''t belive me, look it up... We''ve heard the final Trump-Pence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Advanced Medical Science Comparison An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my friend I watched The Two Towers and it was fun I''ve never seen him get so angry over a Lord Of The Rings film.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbours love my taste in music. They even call the police to listen it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t Falcons eat cereal? They lost the bowl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s jesus favourite singer Michael bible', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just divorced my wife of six years. It was very amicable. She was the first one to "like" my Facebook status when I indicated I was single again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A midget psychic just escaped from prison... She''s a small medium at large.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Well to be Frank... I would have to change my name.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sign said, "Pay with your phone." Sorry Wendy''s, but I think my iPhone7 is worth a little more than your triple baconator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saved 1.50 today... Today I came home from work, out of breath and sweaty. My wife asked me what happened, to which I replied, "I saved 1.50 today by jogging behind the bus instead of riding it." Instead of looking pleased, my wife looked annoyed. "Bloody moron," she said, "if you had jogged behind a taxi you could have saved 20!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend wanted me to treat her like she was special... ...so I got her a helmet and a box of crayons!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did they call Mozart after he died? A decomposer Baddoom-tish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Optimist vs Pessimist Optimistthe glass is half full Pessimistthe glass is half empty Feministthe glass is being raped', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police officer: "Can you identify yourself, sir?" Driver pulls out his mirror and says: "Yes, it''s me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Around 26 out of 100 people fail at probability theory that''s over 60%', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to Jared But then I saw the prices and decided to buy a ring on amazon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a letter from a feminist? Hate male.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t know why the Samoa Girl Scout cookies are racially insensitive... because I''m white and I have no problem with crackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On my flight to Australia I was asked if I had any criminal records I was confused, because I didn''t know it was still a requirement', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The price of balloons have been plummeting... Specialists say it''s due to inflation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you drop a piano on a minor? A flat minor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an official weapon that shoots pieces of music? A canon canon cannon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Education nominee Betsy DeVos wins Senate confirmation vote I kept seeing this in r/news, but I was sure it belonged here......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seven eight nine. Cinco seis, "Siete! Que haces?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walking home at night comes across a drunk fumbling around under a street light. Man: What''s going on? Drunk: I''m looking for my keys. Man: Did they fall out of your pocket? Drunk: I don''t know but this is where the light is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The difference between men and women... ...is that after being in a relationship for six months a woman wonders if it''s time to say ''I love you'' and a man wonders if it time to fart in bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank coffee before it was cool', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was exposed to a dangerous amount of gamma radiation. It still hertz.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know the german translation for irony? JewWorkingForGasCompany', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The day I cant do my job drunk is the day I hand over my keys today was my last day as a school bus driver', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently got hit by a car in a funeral procession... It still hearse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a far right-wing conservatives favorite candy? Preppermints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton has a smart and beautiful wife Let''s just hope she never meets Hillary', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know, I don''t find the recent super bowl win all that historic... After all, this isn''t the first time Atlanta was burned by the north.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i asked a dyslexic kid if he was Team Santa or Team Satan... (NSFW) he told me to go fuck his mother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sounds of a countryside Teacher in a class after holidays: "Children, who has spent the last holidays at a countryside?" Some pupils says that they have. "What new sounds have you heard in there?" "A cow says MOO" "A cat says MEOW" "The guy next door says GET THE FUCK OFF THE TRACTOR!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the bestselling bodycare product amongst terrorists? Lip bomb', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An interviewer asked me what my biggest weakness was So I replied "Well I''d say my best strength is my listening skills"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In how many parts does the skull divide? It depends on the strength you use to hit it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Caught two friends talking shit about me... Oh,did i say talking?I wanted to say taking and on me while i was sleeping', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did your son like his birthday gifts? -Did your son like his birthday presents? -Oh, he broke every single one of them - the phone, gaming console and even notebook.. -My god! Did he break my gift too?! -Nope, your fucking hammer is fine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife if she wanted to try a new sex position called the 68. I asked if she wanted to try the 68. Wife: What''s a 68? Well it''s when you go down on me, and I''ll owe you one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between Kleenex and the starship Enterprise? They both circle Uranus searching for Clingons', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many of Donald Trump''s Cabinet does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Apparently, they prefer holding meetings in the dark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Chinese food was good But I miss my dog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend asked what to do when the variable and number are next to each other in algebra. I responded "They multiply"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('$1 MILLION IN HEAVEN Joe asked God, "How much is a penny worth in heaven?" God replied, "$1 million." Joe asked, "How long is a minute in heaven?" God said, "One million years." Joe asked for a penny. God said, "Sure, in a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between your mom and my penis? I don''t get turned on when I slam my penis head in a door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the laziest food? Bread. It likes to "loaf" around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man works for a company for nearly a decade without getting promoted He decides that he can either start kissing ass and climb the corporate ladder or he can kill himself. He chose the latter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst thing to happen to a banana gun? It gets Jammed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dorblu A man at a store: "Do you have Dorblu cheese" "What is it Dorblu?" "Oh, it''s a kind of cheese with mold" "Sorry, we haven''t. But we have Dorblu bread and Dorblu sausage"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s Plan... Maybe Trump''s real plan is to make Americans so intolerable that the rest of the world doesn''t want to cross America''s borders.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Michael Jackson and Kmart have in common? They both have boys pants 1/2 off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and the wife were talking about sexy role playing when she asked what I''d like to do. I said "Well, we go to a bar separately and pretend we''ve never met" "Ooh, then what?" she answered I said "Nothing, that''s it".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the travel ban look like at Wal-mart? Well, it''s just a small version of regular sized Ban, both the roll-on and invisible solid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a russian mall cop? Cyka Blart', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the Scandinavian countries communicate during WW2? Norse code', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think it''s about time we start voting for more politicians with breasts I don''t see why not, considering how long we''ve been voting for complete boobs in the first place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there''s a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there''s a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there''s a large limo line at the rental office, but he''s patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there''s no punchline.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve never gone sailing before, but I want to sail around the world one day... I have a yacht to learn before my trip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('European and American at a urinal A European and American go up to a urinal and start peeing. The European turns to the American and says "Heeey.... American!" The American shoots the man a dirty look and says "European..." The other man says "Exactly! How did you know!" The American says "Well, for starters you''re a-peein'' on my leg!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t trip I was testing the floors reflexes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard the Obama''s just got a cleaning bill from the White House... Apparently they left a huge pile of shit in the oval office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an Al-Qaeda base and a Pakistani school? "I don''t know man, I just fly the drone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is this subreddit a vaccum? because all the jokes suck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police stop old man. Ron Chestna 89 years of age was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night . Ron replied, "I''m on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late." The officer asked, "Really? Who''s giving that lecture at this time of night?" Ron replied, "That would be my wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rest In Peace, American Education Coming to an end in DeVos''t way imaginable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been seeing this girl for a while, but I had to drop her Someone stole my pair of binoculars', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many athiests do you need to change a lughtbulb? None. It will be changed by itself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A smart scientist amd a blonde girl sit down on a plane. A very smart man boards a plane and sits down. A blond girl sits next to him. He is bored so he says to her "Let''s play a game, I give you a riddle if you cannot find the answer you pay me 5 dollars. If you answer it though you give me a riddle and I don''t answer it I''ll give you 300$" She says "OK, I''ll go first." "What goes up a hill on 1 leg and goes down on 2?" He thinks about it for a while but after about 10 minutes can''t find a answer so he Google''s it. Nothing. He calls scientists and several well educated people. They have no clue. He, a man of his word gives the 300 dollars to her. He asks for the answer she shrugs and hands him 5$', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar He says ouch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend thinks I''m incapable of being faithful My wife on the other hand... has a pretty hot sister', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superman flies into a bar [OC] Superman flies into a bar and orders a bottle of whiskey and a large glass to go with it. He pours himself two swift drinks and downs it as fast as he could. The bartender says "Hey Superman, you look depressed, what''s up?" Superman replies after pouring and downing himself another drink. "Did you know that the average woman''s pelvis can only take 200 pounds of pressure before being crushed?" "No, I didn''t, why?" Superman shudders. "Me neither."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do with a dead chemist? Ba. For those of you that are having a hard time, Ba is the atomic symbol for Barium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is 10 blocks long and never had sex? The line for the Nintendo Switch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump being elected is proof that we never developed time travel. Today I know why we never developed time travel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife left me because I made too many linkin park references oh well, I guess in the end it doesn''t even matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Know what''s weird about Obama kitesurfing? It means there''s finally something he has in common with Trump: watersports.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a good bar and a woman have in common? Liquor in the front and poker in the back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to work as a corset make for about twenty years But I had to give it up, the work was too constraining.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winter in Poland is like my ex... ...it doesn''t know whether to be cold or hot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m sick and tired of hearing the US doesn''t have Checks and Balances! What do you think the Koch brother''s accountants do?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Home is where your friends are So I''m homeless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asks the doctor "Can I take a bath with diarrhea?" Doctor:"If you could fill the bathtub with it, why not?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you starve in a desert? Because of all the sand which is there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the workplace of a penis dangerous ? Has to work in dark, wet caves, while standing all the time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Harambe''s favorite spice? CAGE-en spice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix a bird, a van, and a dog? A flying carpet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Ba Dum Tshhhh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t stand those stupid people who knock on your door and tell you how you need to be "saved" or you''ll "burn". Stupid firemen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Jesus ripped at his crucifixion? Because he was cross-fit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ordered a dildo online last week Today it finally came.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When it comes to making a simple, quick dinner, YOU CAN''T BEATRICE! Sorry, you can''t beat rice. (by British Comedian Milton Jones)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girls used to call me ugly until they saw my wallet. Now they call me ugly and poor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 16999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of programmers: Those who understand binary and those who don''t', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They just got rid of the head of the funfair. That''s unfair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whom did the Boston Strangler choke last? The Atlanta Falcons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m glad that DeVos was confirmed as education secretary. Now I don''t have to worry about my grandkids being able to read some of my dumbest Facebook posts... or anything else, for that matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Original Content I wish I could post this on another sub', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the turtle that became a chef and opened his own restaurant? His specialty is slow cooked meals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many suh-dudes does it take to change a lightbulb? None, it''s already lit fam!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most confusing holiday for black people? Father''s Day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Jazz performer wear one shoe? It gave him sole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is breaking up with me because of my vegan diet... By the way, have I mentioned I''m a vegan?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Boob a Vagina and an Asshole A BOOB, a VAGINA and an ASSHOLE are debating as to who is the greatest of them all BOOB: I give milk to new born babies and I''m attractive to the opposite sex, that''s why I''m the greatest VAGINA: that''s nothing. I give birth to babies and I accommodate the opposite sex, that''s why I''m the greatest . . . . . . . . . Why are you scrolling down? It''s your turn to speak!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought my son a trampoline for his birthday... But all the little shit did was sit in his wheelchair and cry. PS:Not sure if this one has been on here before or not, a friend told it to me and I thought it should go here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the deplorable shoot with his left hand To try and get IN the basket', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My apartment has more than nine ants, but my landlord refuses to get rid of them. He claims they have **ten ants'' rights**.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t see why Obama gave all his speeches behind bulletproof glass.. I know he''s black and all but I doubt he''d actually shoot anyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe dammit, BREATHE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blind dinosaur? Doyouthinkhesaurus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Past, The Present and The Future walked into a bar. It was tense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing, they fast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an American, you know what really grinds my gears? Not having German Engineering', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a mosquito flying over my head and i caught it Then, I took off its wings and I shouted to it "Go Fly!" but it didnt fly. Conclusion: Mosquitoes go deaf when you remove their wings', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do Palestinians go to have fun at night? The Gaza Strip club.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Cop is searching for a criminal babysitter. He says, "I am going to search every little crook and nanny."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These Bowling Green Massacre jokes are too soon Out of respect, we should at least wait until it takes place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ISIS is winning the war By denying US troops visas into territory surrounding the caliphate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would only play one handed in the music assessment But then I''d be in treble', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was waiting in line at this restaurant to order some fruit punch. That''s it. That was the punch-line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s presidency is historic... He''s the first president to ever be more concerned about personal insecurity than he is about national security.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do muslims color with? Qurayons', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in an airport in South Korea recently, and while shopping, asked the cashier which currency he preferred. A bit agitated, he replied... "The Korean Won!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A, C, and E walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don''t serve minors."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You guys hear about the fire at the circus? It was InTENTSe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A photon walks into a hotel with his luggage... The bellhop asks, "sir, do you need help with your bags?" The photon responds, "that''s alright, I''m traveling light!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''Knock knock'' ''Who''s there'' ''Okay Google'' ''Okay Google, who?'' ''Sorry I didn''t catch that'' ''OKAY GOOGLE WHO?'' ''The World Health Organization is a specialized agency of the United Nations that is concerned with international public health. It was established on 7 April 1948, headquartered in Geneva, Switzerland.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Communist sniper? A Marxman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris calls a local hardware store.. Chuck: Do you have a rod? Store guy: Yes. Chuck: Then shove it up your ass. *hangs up The store guy again gets a call from Chuck but the store guy thinks he has got it this time. Chuck: Do you have a rod? Store guy: No. Chuck: Did you shove it up your ass? *hangs up After a while the store guy again gets a call and the store guy thinks to himself "No way he is gonna have me this time". Chuck: Do you have a rod? Store guy: Yes and no. Chuck: Are you repetitively shoving it up your ass? *hangs up The store guy is furious now.He is so furious that this time he calls Chuck. Store guy: Do you have a rod? Chuck: Why? Do you want to shove it up your ass?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many millennials does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Shit''s already mad lit, fam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A concerned husband goes to his priest... "Father, I think my wife is trying to poison me. Every time she makes me something to eat, the rat poison bottle gets lighter and lighter." Troubled by hearing this, the priest tells the man, "I will go and speak with your wife and see what is going on here." The priest then heads to their home and sits down with the wife and has a long discussion. He then comes back to talk to the husband. "I''ve spoken with your wife for over 45 minutes about this", the priest said. The husband looks intently at the priest, "Yeah, what should I do?" The priest calmly says "you should take the poison."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a refugee''s favourite song? Welcome to the Jungle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re going to start letting animals participate in the X Games... They will all have to go through extreme vetting before entering', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the sewer the other day... It was a load of crap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We didn''t elect Harambe for president But we still got a gorilla in office', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People claim that in the English language, y can be a vowel but I think that''s just a myth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Hyaenidae and a butt on weed? The first are hyenas The second is a high-anus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Went to the gym today and cheered everyone on for an hour. On the way out the trainer stopped me... Confused he asked me what I was doing at the gym. So I told him exactly what I was doing: "Lifting Spirits"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the Soviet Union join WW2 until 1941? They were using Stalin-tactics', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit is like cancer Once you''ve noticed it it really grows on you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the funniest software? Lotus Notes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t. Never laugh at your wifes choices& youre one of them &', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the car-loving cowboy say when he meets people? H'' Audi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse walks into the bar... It neigh''s, shits on the floor and walks out, leaving the bar patron''s bewildered', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ubisoft Servers. Thats it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So as I was serving dinner, my wife asked why we were having Brussels Sprouts, "I thought you hated them, having been forced to eat as a child." "I did," I replied, "but I have been trying to do thing I despised as a child to expand my horizons. Surprisingly, I like Lima beans, and I love naps, of course. " "Well I am proud of you! What can I do to help you ''expand your horizons''?" I replied, as nonchalantly as possible, "I am going to need you to fuck my ass".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Request] Tell me your best bird puns! Giving someone a bird themed gift, what are some puns I can use for the card? (It''s not for a birthday, so "happy bird-day" won''t work).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New England Patriots are the Super Bowl World Champions I loved the way they destroyed Germany in semi-finals, and embarrassed Rwanda in the final.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Argon walks into a bar. The bartender says "we don''t serve noble gases here." Argon doesn''t react.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do the light end up? In prism. xD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently saw a video of a girl sitting on various fruit To me, that''s fucking bananas', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Jesus feel after the Romans killed him? How did Jesus feel after the Romans killed him? He felt pretty cross.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was announced yesterday that the 2020 Summer Olympics in Tokyo will make all of its medals from recycled cellphones. Well, theyre going to make the Olympic torch out of a Samsung Galaxy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? A: "You may have graduated but I''ve got so many degrees"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Verbal skills study "A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh." --Conan O''Brien', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dick is like Stan Lee I know he''ll appear, but i don''t know when and when I notice it''s already too late.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a jacket... And he''ll be able to leave the house. Teach a man to jacket, and he''ll never leave the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gave my friend in a wheelchair 3 hits of molly last night He''s still rollin'' this morning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My family and friends always told me I was an ''artistic person''. Finally got a hearing aid and... well... let''s just say that was *not* what they were trying to tell me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife made coffee this morning and I ended up with a piece of coffee bean in my teeth at the weekly department meeting. My lawyer has informed me this qualifies as grounds for divorce.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother told me to stop acting like a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken walk into the light? To get to the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny is on his grandpa''s farm in the rabbit enclosure Johnny is on his grandpa''s farm in the rabbit enclosure. The ground is covered in rabbit droppings. Johnny asks, "What are all of the pellets on the floor grandpa?" His grandpa replies, "Oh those? Those are smart pills. You eat them and you get smarter." Johnny likes the sound of that so he grabs a large handful of them and shoves them into his mouth, "Yuck! Grandpa, these taste like crap." His grandpa replies, "You''re getting smarter already."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Simple mathematics A college math professor and his wife are both 60 years old. One evening the wife comes home and finds a note from her husband that says, "My dear, now that you are 60 years old, there are some things you no longer do for me. I am at the Holiday Inn with my 20-year-old student. Don''t bother waiting up for me." He returns home late that night to find a note from his wife: "You, my dear, are also 60 years old and there are also things I need that you''re not giving me. So I am at the Motel 6 with one of your 20-year-old students. Being a math professor, I''m sure you know that 20 goes into 60 way more than 60 goes into 20. So, don''t you wait up for me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Job Interview: Mental Asylum A newly graduated Psychiatrist goes to an interview at a Mental Asylum.... "So you''re interested in coming to work for us here? Tell me what is your experience with mentally deranged people?" "I''ve been on Reddit for nearly 6 months now" "You''re hired!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife told me that I twist everything she says to my advantage. I take that as a compliment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old School Friend I called an old school friend and asked what he was doing now. He replied that he was currently working on: *Aqua-thermal treatment on ceramics, aluminium and steel under a constrained environment* I was impressed...... On further enquiry, I learnt that he was washing dishes, with hot water under his wife''s supervision.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alternative phrases to "Calm your tits" * Soothe Your boobs * De-stress your breasts * Undo the calamity that is your mammaries * adjust your bust before it combusts * Give that chest a rest * Hakuna your tatas * Dont have a rack attack * Bring peace to your bosoms', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was very naive sexually My first boyfriend asked me to do missionary and I buggered off to Africa for six months - Hayley Ellis, 2012', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a revolutionist''s favourite pastry? Coup d''tart', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband & his wife went for Divorce at court. Husband & his wife went for Divorce at court. Judge : U have 3 kids...How will u divide them? He had long discussion with his wife & said " Ok, sir We will come next year with 1 more kid" Joke doesn''t end here.... 9 months later....They got twins', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a vampiric hummingbird''s favourite drink? Necktar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On my way for the latest Porsche presentation.. the airport officials requested the purpose of my flight. I wrote down "I''m here for the newest 911". Best regards from Guantanamo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend asked me not to kill a spider, but said I should take it out instead. I''m getting really sick of her sending these mixed messages.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Pygmalion''s girlfriend break up with him? Because he took her for granite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teddy Bears never feel Hungry Why the Teddy bears never feel hungry? Because they are always stuffed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the hipster burn his mouth? He drank P.B.R. before it was cool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('do you understand your right breast is hanging out of your shirt A blonde was walking down the street. A policeman was walking the opposite way. "Hmmm," he wondered, "It looks as if that lady''s right breast is hanging out of her shirt." As he got closer, he realized it was. He approched her. He said, "Ma''am, do you understand your right breast is hanging out of your shirt?" She replied, "Oh shit. I left the baby on the bus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Red Man There was once a man who absolutely loved the colour red. Everything he owned was red. His house, his walls, his shoes, his fridge, everything. Because of this obsession, he was a huge fan of sunbaking - not the tanning kind, the burning kind. He did love the colour red. Not only this, he always did it in the nude; to become as red as possible, of course. One day as he was sunbaking, a man was hit by a car at an intersection down the road. The moral of the story is to never cross the road when the red man is flashing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the Atlanta Falcons and a white noise machine have in common? They both make artificial fan sounds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife just got back from her OB/GYN appointments. He told her she cannot have sex 6 weeks. I said, "That''s fine but what did your dentist say?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police: Come out with your hands up! Police: Come out with your hands up! Me: I''m gay. Police: So brave...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m going to buy my Dungeon Master a goldfish So I can carp a DM', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No just up to my boobs... Milkman brings milk to blondes door. [old times,1950] notices, note, says please i need 5 gal. today to take a milk bath.in dismay Man rings bell. Blonde in robe opens door,milkman says "5 gal mam ,dont you mean 5qts." She says no gallons, "I''m taking a milk bath today." The milkman asks "Ok how would you like that pasturized?" Woman replies, "No just up to my boobs!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would you find inside a billion year old ice planet on the other side of the universe? One of my wife''s hairs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse in a bar A horse is standing at the bar when a man walks up to him. "Why the long face?" he asked jokingly. "I''m stage four terminal and my wife left me, taking everything with her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Whitney Houston say when asked which parts of public buildings are generally the most affectionate? Hallways love yooooouuuuu.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw my girlfriend shoving a calculator up her vagina. I said, "What the fuck are you doing? You look like you''re in agony." She said, "It''s what''s inside that counts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know today the world is celebrating "Safer Internet Day" If you''re celebrating too, stay away from porn and other internet nasties :D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Chinese people see? Cause they must get ''A''!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes a chicken sneeze? Boog boog boog bogaaa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good, bad, worse Good: I slept with my teacher after prom last night. Bad: I was home schooled. Worse: by my dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One by one, a class of fifth-graders were called on to make sentences with words chosen by their teacher. Nick didn''t often participate in class, so his teacher was glad when she saw him raise his hand to give it a try. "Nick," said the teacher, "make a sentence with the words ''defeat,'' ''defense,'' ''deduct,'' and ''detail.''" Nick thought for a few minutes then smiled. He shouted, "Defeat of deduct went over defense before detail!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dog in heat Her dog was in heat, but she agreed to look after her neighbor''s male dog while the neighbor was on vacation. She had a large house and she believed that she could keep the two dogs apart. However, as she was drifting off to sleep, she heard awful howling sounds. She rushed downstairs and found the dogs locked together and unable to disengage, as frequently happens when dogs mate. Unable to separate them, and perplexed as to what to do next, and although it was very late at night, she called her vet, who answered in a very grumpy voice. After she explained the problem to him, the vet said, "Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs. I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing will make the male lose his erection and he will be able to withdraw." "Do you think that will work?" she asked. "Just worked for me," he replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Metal fans don''t rest in peace, they RUST in peace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why you shouldn''t you buy Russian underpants ? Coz Cher-nob-il fallout !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would people from 1000 years ago say... If you told them in the future you''ll be able to travel and communicate with people around the world near instantly. "You mean across?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian man is driving with his wife and small child. A militia man pulls them over and makes the man take a breathalyzer test. "See," the militia man says, "you''re drunk." The man protests that the breathalyzer must be broken and invites the cop to test his wife. She also registers as drunk. Exasperated, the man invites the cop to test his child. When the child registers drunk as well, the cop shrugs, says, "Yes, perhaps it is broken," and sends them on their way. Out of earshot the man tells his wife, "See, I told you it wouldn''t hurt to give the kid five grams of vodka."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s pink and covered in cobwebs? Maddie McCann''s bike.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried selling drugs once. I tried selling drugs once. The guy asked me for some coke and I paniced and asked him if Pepsi was ok.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Girlfriends asked me why the Body cells go through Meiosis and why her textbook sexualized them. I replied "Sex Cells."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the swine who like children? Pigofiles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Mexican Fozzie Bear say? "Oaxaca, oaxaca, oaxaca!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t you write with a dull pencil? Because it''s pointless. IT''S POINTLESS.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb? Lets go play on our bikes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the T-Rex angry? His arms were too short to sarcastically slow clap this terrible joke...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up and in the cupboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a German, you know what really grinds my gears? Nothing. Our engineering is perfect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Presidential monster Remember guys, Steve Bannon is the President. Trump is the name of his monster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a Jew gets a new phone... Can they use their own number???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I introduced my girlfriend to my family My wife did not like her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know that Frank was an honest person? Whenever anyone tells the truth, they are either Frank or doing it like Frank.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Childhood Nursery Rhyme Old Mother Hubbard, went to her cupboard to fetch her poor dog a bone... But Rover took over, and he bent her over, and gave her a bone of his own', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What public official is most prone to giving their stuff away? A sheriff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('big brother is watching you... and he is bored!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump & the iPhone 7 have in common? They both come with force touch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which one is heavier? A tonne of rocks or a tonne of feathers? The answer? Its a tonne of feathers because you also have to carry the weight of what you did to all those poor birds...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superman is horny Superman is randy as hell he needs to get laid in the worst way. Lois has been holding out and he needs a woman. Superman figures, fuck it, I''m super-sonic. I''ll drop a nut on someone light speed and they''ll never know. So he''s flying around and passes by Wonder Woman''s apartment. Intriguingly enough, she is naked, alone, and writhing in her personal ecstasy. It''s summer, her window is open... Superman can''t resist. At the speed of light, before she''ll know anything, he''s "in and out". Back in the Fortress of Solitude, a somewhat calmer Superman murmurs to himself "A Superman has to do what he needs to." Meanwhile, Wonder Woman rolls of her her couch and exclaims "holy shit, that that was the best ever" The Invisible Man responded "Yeah, but my ass is killing me"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid #1: I wish I had been born 1,000 years ago. Kid #2: Why is that? Kid #1: Just think of all the history that we wouldn''t have to learn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Obama and Mike Pence are playing tennis While playing tennis with Mike Pence, Obama gets angry and every time he misses he screams "God dammit I missed!" This goes on for a while until Mike Pence yells "If you use the lords name in vain one more time a lightning bolt will come from the sky and strike you" They continue playing until Obama misses again, he screams "God dammit I missed!" In that moment a lighting bolt comes from the sky and strikes Mike Pence, he dies on the spot. A couple of seconds later a voice from above the clouds says "God dammit I missed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why would New Zealand starting a war against Australia be historical? It would be the first time New Zealand declared anything against Australia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The KGB, the FBI and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at catching criminals The Secretary General of the UN decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that the rabbit does not exist. The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and make no apologies: the rabbit had it coming. The KGB goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: Okay! Okay! Im a rabbit! Im a rabbit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend just split up with me. She kept crying and saying that I spend too much time on the internet. Jokes on her, there are hundreds of hot singles in my area looking to hook up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you seen any of Stevie Wonder''s music videos? He hasn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you serious No, I''d have to change my name for that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An infectious disease walks into a bar. Barman says, we don''t serve your type here. Infectious disease replies, well, you are not a very good host.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting married before the age of 25 Getting married before the age of 25 sounds a lot like leaving a party before 10 PM to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kids on social media nowadays are so selfish. It''s always meme meme meme.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the hardest question on Timmy''s homework last night? 69d.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What brand of glasses do short-sighted dyslexic nymphomaniacs wear? FCUK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people fall in love with pavements? Because they touch our soles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is just like the rest of us Melania puts his pants on one leg at a time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think people are underestimating the effect of fruit on the human race. I mean come on, people all across the US are rioting because of a fucking orange.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With all the negativity in the world today... ...at least Charlie Sheen is staying positive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was told it was racist to use "welsh" when someone won''t pay a bet. They said to use "renege". So I called them a bunch of renegers instead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dog ran away this morning. I walked around the neighbourhood looking and calling his name for an hour but still couldn''t find him. My wife said I should look harder, so I shaved my head and got a couple of tattoos. Still can''t find the fucking dog....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(An original) I''ll always get in a fight with someone with dwarfism.... We just don''t see eye to eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two nuns, Sr Mary and Sr Patricia, are driving down a dark forest road, late at night... When all of a sudden a vampire jumps out in front of their car. Sr Mary screeches on the brakes and says to Sr Patricia: "Quick! Get out and show it your cross!" Sr Patricia steps out of the car and yells "Oi! Get off the fucking road you stupid cunt!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man has been admitted to hospital after shoving 6 toy horses up his arse. Doctors have described his condition as stable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just ate a frozen apple! Hardcore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a new theory on inertia but it doesnt seem to be gaining momentum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scumbag Steve, when told the babe at the party had Herpes Zoster on her head, asked "Do the shingles match the carpet?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SKY DIVING LESSONS An idiot was taking sky-diving lessons. The instructor explained that it was time for his first jump, and all he had to do was jump from the plane, count to six, and pull the rip cord. A truck would be waiting for him in the field where he would land. The man jumped from the plane when he was told to, and counted to six. When he pulled the rip cord, the parachute wouldn''t open. He tried the reserve chute and that didn''t open. Frustrated, he muttered to himself as he fell, "I''ll bet the damn truck won''t be waiting for me either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the funniest bird alive? A Hahastrich!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Whitney Houston''s favourite type of coordination? HAND EYEEEEEEE', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Banned oranges... It''s 2021 and I went to the supermarket to buy some oranges but couldn''t find any. I went to another one but there were no oranges again... I asked the store manager what''s the matter He said "Trump banned all the Muslims for what some of them did so the new president banned all the oranges for what one of them did".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Batman running out of church? Christian Bale', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do u reanimate a corpse? Abra Cadavera!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do Mexicans cut their pizza? "Little Cea-sars"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump really needs to do something about all these Canadians. Seriously, geese are the worst.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Sovereign Citizen cross the road? ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! AM I BEING DETAINED?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Third times the charm... ...said god before he accidentally created down syndrome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my jeep Topless and easy to get into.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pretty sure I have mites! Cell: "I''m itching all the time and I can''t stop. Pretty sure I have mites!" Doctor: "You are a cell. Individual bodily cells don''t have mites." Cell: "Pretty sure I have mites!" Doctor: "Look, we''ve run the tests. You don''t have mites!" Cell: "Are you sure?" Doctor: "As I explained on your last three visits, what you have is a severe case of mitochondria!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What will be the most profitable career in 2017? Mexican ladder salesman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Scooby Doo''s favorite chocolate? Fe rrer ruh-roh cher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sentence from a schoolboy''s weekly composition class essay - "My cat just had seven kittens. They are all communists". Sentence from same boy''s composition the following week... - "My cat''s seven kittens are all capitalists". Teacher reminds boy that previous week he had said the kittens were communists. "But now they have opened their eyes" replies the child.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So the horse walked into a bar ... and the bartender said, "Say fella, why the long face?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black guy in a library asked me where the colored printer was I replied: "Go use the one in the back you nigger"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many police officers does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just beat the shit outta the room for being black..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I see lovers'' names carved into a tree I don''t think it''s sweet. I just think it''s surprising how many people bring a knife on a date.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What word is used to describe a plant''s range of emotions? Chlorofeels', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Twelve: One to screw it in. One to excoriate men for creating the need for illumination. One to blame men for inventing such a faulty means of illumination. One to suggest the whole screwing bit to be too rape-like. One to deconstruct the lightbulb itself as being phallic. One to blame men for not changing the bulb. One to blame men for trying to change the bulb instead of letting a woman do it. One to blame men for creating a society that discourages women from changing light bulbs. One to blame men for creating a society where women change too many light bulbs. One to advocate that light bulb changers should have wage parity with electricians. One to alert the media that women are now out-lightbulbing men. One to just sit there taking pictures for her blog for photo-evidence that men are unnecessary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it always a good idea to wear ''tall pants''? Because it''s a practice of good high-jean!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you spell DEATH? A-va-da Ke-da-vra!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not okay to just punch a nazi in the face You''re supposed to finish the job', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a small black dot between two larger white ones? A flea with cotton wool in its ears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A flight attendant sees a suspicious couple on board... She decides to report it to the pilot immediately. "Sir, I think we have a case of human trafficking! The female passenger looks pretty frightened and the man she is with looks dangerous!" The pilot responds, "Patricia, I''ve told you before. This is Air Force One..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do crows drink in the morning? CAWWWWWW-FEE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Gf''s ponytail always comes undone when we''re together Oh well, I guess it just comes with the *hairritory*.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just became a fan of Adele She had me at Hello', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when rabbis eat too many carrots? Orange juice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog with seven legs that can''t walk right? Severalpawsy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Melania say to Donald right after sex? Honey, I''ll be home in 30 minutes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four gay guys walk into a bar Bartender says,"Sorry, only one unoccupied stool at the moment." Gay guy says,"That''s completely fine." Gay man proceeds to turn the stool upside down and each of them sits on a leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife recently won the Annual Women''s Golf Meet in our district Needless to say, I have started calling her the "Intercourse Champion of the County "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are OP''s Mom and Velour alike? they both take several days to dry out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re feeling cold, go stand in the corner. It''s 90 degrees there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a horny midget? An extended version of The Hobbit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the otter that begged a beaver to build him a dam? The beaver did not give a barrier that impounds water or underground streams', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love my doctor He told me I only had 3 months to live. I said "thanks for letting me know, doc; but I''m sorry, I don''t know how I''ll be able to pay you." So he got me six more months.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m completely OK with peeing in the shower.. It''s only natural to have a little come out when you''re having a poo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the oven get its TV show green lit? Because the pilot light was out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A giant mushroom attempts to enter a bar... and is stopped by the bouncer. The bouncer says we''ll have none of your sort in here tonight. The mushroom says, "Why not? I''m a fungi!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you an ass man or a tits man? I ass myself that every day. Tits a bit hard to figure out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a russian cow? Mos-cow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mexican magician was at his gig... He said to the audience: "on the count of 3 i will disappear. Uno... Dos..." and he vanished without a Tres', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My local ski resort was ripped off last week for around $900. The robber stole a burger, two beers, and some chips.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Trump was a spy in the Vietnam War, what would his code name be? Agent Orange', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally misidentified my friend''s pet bird It was hawkward.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would tell you all an anus joke.. Butt fuck it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a smart blonde? A Golden Retriever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our anniversary is coming up, so my wife told me that she would be happy as long as I get her something with a lot of diamonds in it. She will love this pack of playing cards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady has 6 of the most desired rings in the world 5 are from the Super Bowl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The problem with Donald Trump is... He never learned harass was one word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t kleptomaniacs get puns? They always take things literally.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I promised my mom I would never get raped I said I would always consent. She said no one would want to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice. Hi I''m Joe and I eat ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Hitler''s philosophy on PR? Weimar your reputation when you know you''re in the Reich!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy who urinates bug spray? Pissed OFF!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Super Bowl 51 will go down as the Gettysburg Address of the NFL Four score and 20 minutes to go.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump like Jesus?? He''ll never be as good as his Daddy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend looked at my pregnant wife and said: "I wonder if it isn''t really hot in there, for the baby" I replied: "It''s likely womb-temperature."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Captain Hook die? He wiped with the wrong hand', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does ''mine shaft'' mean to a German? His Penis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a frisky Optimus Prime called? An autothot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If foreigners are upset to have had their visas cancelled... Why don''t they just apply for MasterCards instead?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Trump''s Cabinet called? The Insane Clown''s Posse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend accused me of cheating I told her she sounded like my wife', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? Wipe his butt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cannibal say when he ate a clown? "That tasted funny."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An inmate at my work threw his food down onto his tray. "Now I know why people turn gay in prison..." "...I''d rather lick another man''s butthole than eat this crap." I died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many Trumpies does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Five. One to write the executive order, one to get it signed, one to announce it to the press, one to provide the alternative facts, and one to call Obama to ask him how. (Edit: Friend told me this joke and I said I would post it for her)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jokes from a high one If Winnie went to the bathroom in the 100 acre woods, what would something be he should NOT take out with him? The Poooooo Or maybe you would cause like you''re in the woods. Where else would it go. No sewage systems..hmm I''ll come back to this one. Has to be something to do with poo tho..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Christian man and his children are talking.. Girl: Dad, I have some bad news. Dad: What? Girl: I''m a lesbian. Dad: Okay. Sister: Dad, I have some bad news too. Dad: What? Sister: I''m a lesbian too. Dad: God, does anyone in this house like boys? Son: I do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do men go for vacation after their bar mitzvah? Jew-bouti', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Call Of Duty players does it take to change a light bulb? Both of them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Listen to this new joke.... 584753', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when a song is cut off before it ends? ...a clefhanger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Paris have trees along Main Street? Because Germans like to walk in the shade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 Englishmen are stranded in a forest... and after days without food they come across a dead deer. Unable to decide on who gets to eat what part, the first says: "Well I go for Manchester, so I''ll have the chest." The second says "I go for Liverpool, so I''ll have the liver." He then turns to the third and says "Enjoy your meal Gunners supporter"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the neutron that was arrested yesterday? He wasn''t charged tho', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two sides of hummus decided to go out to eat Two sides of hummus decided to go out to eat. Once they finished eating, they said, "chickpeas!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An internet meme caught his wife cheating in their bed. "And I say heeey heeey heeey heeey heeey!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You wanna know how to say "Redonkulous" in Spanish? "Redicburro"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump just posted a picture of the protests in Romania.. .. as evidence he had the biggest inauguration crowd ever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two refugees are waiting in line to get into the US... Two refugees are waiting in line to get into the US, one says "screw this line, I''m going to shoot Trump". He leaves for a while and then comes back to resume his place in line. The other guy says "so, did you do it?" He says "no, the line there was even longer than this one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the patient angry at the doctor who wanted his urine sample? He was taking the piss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy walks into a Mexican restaurant but he''s not that hungry... And they serve free tortilla chips. He asks for one chip and they give it to him. He swipes his credit card, and nothing happens. The employee looks at him and says, "Dude... it''s a chip."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between my gf and Roald Dahl Roald Dahl has a Magic Finger', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Captain hook can''t kill 20 kindergarteners. But Sandy Hook can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At what time do drug dealers wake up? At the crack of dawn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My old girlfriend was bad at math That''s Y she''s my X.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Trump supporter''s favorite college? Electoral.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the father buffalo say to his son as his son was leaving? "Please be careful on your way to school. There are hunters out there today and I''m worried." "It''s ok, Dad," his son replied, "I''ll be safe." The son buffalo had just gotten out of sight before the dad heard the gunshots and wept. If only he''d just made him stay home....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Donald Trump like the NFL better than college football? Because it''s Big League', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My African-American friend hooked up with a girl from Thailand... It was a real black-Thai affair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what does a hornet an rain gear have in common? Yellow jacket', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about the Bowling Green Massacre? On 9/3/16 they lost to The Ohio State 77-10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a surrealist painter that converts to Islam? Muhammad Dali', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who are the fastest readers in the world? The people in the World Trade Center, those mother fuckers blew through 110 stories in 5 seconds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken go to the library? To check out a book-book-book!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a stubborn donkey? A badass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the easiest class in a Catholic school? Religion. It has no facts to memorize', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I change my major from law to liberal arts. Psych.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend doesn''t want me to come in her ear My girlfriend said not to cum in my ear because she will go deaf, but I told her that I cum in her mouth all the time and that doesn''t get her to shut the fuck up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t sharks eat more than one dentist at a time? They''re filling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Extreme Vetting and Waterboarding? (Also seeking alternate punch lines) .... the need for rendition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brady once again charged with letting the air out of something. This time it was the Falcons defense', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is a teacher hoping for a snow day, and I told her to brace for Winter Storm Christopher. She said "They don''t close schools in Michigan for 3 inches of white stuff"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the gangster who loved apples? He was a member of the honeycrips', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Talking street A man walks up to a street. The street says to the man: "Hey!" The jumps in surprise as the street shouts at him once more. The man is puzzled. "Excuse me?" The man said. "I''m a talking street! I tell you when a car is coming!" "That''s convenient," The man replied. The road told the man that there where no cars coming. The man crossed the street. The man began crossing back to the side in which he came from. "What are you doing?" Asked the street. "Double-Crossing you!" The man laughed. The man promptly got hit by a semi truck. The Road replied with: "I''m not letting you walk all over me like that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[nsfw] Everybody thinks Tom Brady had the best comeback ever But Kim Kardashian is the cumback queen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Found this joke on a sticky note Person1: Hey person2 I need to get into your Reddit account, what''s the username and password? Person2: Ok, the username is "suck my" Person1: Ok, and the password? Person2: Dick Person1: Passwords too short.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Climate change doesn''t matter if you stay indoors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend is upset because her boyfriend won''t eat out anymore since they got a meal delivery service. She says she''s going to try putting a blue apron sticker on her box and see what happens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(NSFW) I''m a bit like Beer... I also come in pints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The more medical students I met, the less I trust doctors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do young bees get to school? Why, the school buzz, of course!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the weird physicist? He''s a lovely guy but he''s got some strange quarks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time does the library open? The man on the phone asks. "Nine AM," came the reply. "And what''s the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?" "Not until nine AM?" The man said in a disappointed voice. "No not till nine!" The librarian said. "Why do you want to get in before nine?" "Who said I wanted to get in? I want to get out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What word do you never want to call a Black Man that starts with N and ends with r Neighbor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most common phrase uttered by a blond after sex? "Are you guys all on the same team?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should doctors wear surgical masks when pulling the plug on Donald Trump? So no one can see their smiles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can you make a comparison between the Patriots and Lara Croft? Because they both get TomBrady', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just read a post about Queen Elizabeth II, and something struck me as odd... After spending 65 years on the throne, I suppose she''s the most constipated ruler ever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just when defeat seemed inevitable... when all hope was lost and my prayers seemed futile... THE PATRIOTS WON !!! Oh, and something about a big game yesterday? I don''t watch football.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid says to his younger brother: "Look, i found a dildo underneath mom''s pillow." The brother replies: "What''s a pillow?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you start a rave in Ethiopia? You nail a piece of toast to the wall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tired of people complaining about Ukrainian body''s of water that Russia is occupying Crimea river.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the leader of Russia say when someone knocked on the bathroom door? Leave me alone Im Putin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do we evacuate women before the men in an emergency? So we can assess the situation properly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone was handing out certificates for a free Karate Lesson at the mall yesterday He told me I could only Taek Won Do', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots are true gentlemen. They let the Falcons finish their game before they started theirs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THE BIG CRASH It is the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere, two cars both slightly cross over the white line in the centre of the road. They collide and a fair amount of damage is done, miraculously neither driver is hurt. They both get out. One is a doctor, one is a lawyer. The lawyer calls the police on his cell phone and they say they will be there within 20 minutes. Its cold and damp, and both men are shaken up. The lawyer offers the doctor a drink of brandy from his hip flask, the doctor accepts, drinks and hands it back to the lawyer, who then puts it away. Arent you going to have a drink? the doctor says. AFTER the police get here. replies the lawyer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a library and says to the librarian "CAN I GET A BIG MAC FRIES AND A COKE?!!" The librarian says "excuse me miss.....this is a library." The blonde says...."oh im sorry (whispers) can i get a big mac fries and a coke?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a pizza and an art degree? A pizza doesn''t deliver an art degree', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finally took Revenge from my ex... She had it since last two weeks. Gotta return it back to the library.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know there''s an actual name for unexpected sex right? The Spanish Inquisition. Because no one sees it coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are a lot of jokes in the world Most of them are people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t drink anymore. I freeze it now and I eat it like a popsicle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate to be a bad loser A blonde, a red head and a brunette were competing in the Huron River Breast Stroke Championships. The redhead won and the brunette came in second. However, there was no sign of the final contestant. Hours and hours went by causing grave concern and worry. Just as everyone was losing hope, the blonde finally arrived. The crowd was extremely happy and relieved to see her. They embraced the young girl as she came ashore. After all of the excitement died down, she leaned over to the judge and whispered, "I hate to be a bad loser, but I think those other girls used their arms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I couldn''t sleep because woman was knocking on my door at 2 AM last night I tried to go back to sleep but eventually I had to let her out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to an ENT doctor Because his nose was growing at an excessive rate, it was already 11 and a half inches long. Doctor walks in and says, I''m sorry to have to tell you this, but if it keeps it up, by this time next week I won''t be able to see you anymore. I''ll have to give you a referral to a podiatrist, because by next week, it''ll already be a foot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am terrified of elevators, I''m gonna start taking steps to avoid them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe as a society, it is our dictionaries that define us.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a confusing sex dream last night It was a real mindfuck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the church 1,000 years ago and the church today? A thousand years ago Father Roy didn''t get arrested.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to know how I got back from the middle east? I Ran', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I jokingly told my friend I was gay... He''s been fucking me in the ass for 3 months now and hasn''t figured out the truth yet. Haha, I can''t wait to see the look on his face!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roger Goodell must be drunk after last night from... all the boos from the Patriots'' fans during the post game ceremonies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Trump can never finish a book He always gets stuck in chapter 11', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does Matthew Mcconaughey''s Political Ideology come from? The Altright, Altright, Altright', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why won''t Lion win Best Picture? Starving Indian children has always been a naan-issue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my very religious mother for the new iPhone... And she said she''d get me a smartphone, but I had a choice. If I start going to church, I would get the iPhone I wanted. If I didn''t go to church, I would get a crappy low end android. She said it was Yahweh or the Huawei.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('and God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of world... ...then God made the Earth round..and he laughed and laughed. edit: I proof read this so may times... amd -> and', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('U should try the salmon in river styxs Its too die for', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Alabama the best place for sandwiches? Because of their experience working with inbreds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The problem with Bill Clinton Is that he never learned harass was one word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a substance that makes people attracted to both genders? A bi-product!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Australians don''t have sex Australians mate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Cardinal walks into the Pope''s office... ... and he says, "Your Eminence, I have some good news and some bad news." The Pope, of course, is an optimistic fellow, so he says, "I''ll have the good news first." The Cardinal tells him, "It seems that Jesus Christ has returned. He''s on the phone and he wants to speak to you." The Pope, of course, is elated. He says, "There can be no bad news on a day like this, but go ahead: what''s the bad news?" And the Cardinal tells him, "He''s calling from Salt Lake City."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you choke a predatory bird? Give them a 28-3 lead in the Super Bowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where is the safest place to be on a capsizing ship? (Worst joke ever) The Galley! Everything but the kitchen sinks. ^(I warned you)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the father buffalo say to his son as he left for school? Bison.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your breasts looked bigger on your profile... ...which means I won''t feel so bad when you pull my pants down now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Farmer''s Daughter A farmer drove to a neighbors farmhouse and knocked at the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door. "Is your dad or mom home?" said the farmer. "No, they went to town." "How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?" "No, he went with Mom and Dad." The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, mumbling to himself, when the young boy says, "I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give Dad a message." "Well," said the farmer uncomfortably, "No, I really want to talk to your Dad, about your brother Howard getting my daughter Suzy pregnant!". The boy thought for a moment, then says, "Youll have to talk to my Dad about that. I know he charges $50 for the bulls and $15 for the pigs, but I have no idea how much he charges for Howard."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brokeback Mountain was such a nontraditional movie... ... it''s the only one I''ve seen where the good guy gets it in the end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of food just puts you in a bad mood? Feel-awful', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Mexico''s National Animal? The drug mule.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What file format does Gordon Ramsay take photos in? FUCKING RAW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I nearly talked my way out of a speeding fine earlier by telling this Police woman she looked bloody stunning Then I went and fucked it up by saying, ''And that''s not the drink talking either''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks in and notices something different about his wife.... He walks into the house and is pretty sure this time something might be different with his Wife. "The hair!" he thinks... Hmm.. No.... "The dress!" he continues Nup.... "The shoes!" he hazards. No.. No... not sure... Then he realises.... He''s walked into the wrong house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Falcons CHOKE!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the recipe for success for ice cream men? Good Humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the correct way to pronounce nihilism? Doesn''t matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You should always have a pet to make you feel safe... Just the other night my wife woke me tell me heard glass breaking and footsteps downstairs. She calmed down when I told it was probably just the fish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look at all those hot children in that schoolyard! It''s 115F out you sick fucks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between my ex gf and my childhood imagination? Nothing, they both don''t exist anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If life gives you lemons, you make lemonade, But if fife gives you melons... You probably have dyslexia', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Single ones from Reddit: If you have to choose between your dream date and one last concert of Queen? How many hours you will arrive early?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the French call the Germans during WW1? Somme of bitches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to Basic Training with some guy who was issued two left footed boots. He didn''t say anything, and just wore two left boots on his feet. He ended up being medically discharged for foot problems before he graduated. But the guy who was issued two right footed boots on his feet managed to graduate. He was all right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:Name of Melanias new book A:Mein Trump', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ahmad, a Muslim American man, was at the United States border... Ahmad, a Muslim American man, was at the United States border, returning to the USA after a holiday in Canada. He rolled down the window to his car and pulled up to the Border Guard who was waving him forward. "What is the purpose of your visit?" asked the border guard. ''I''m an American. I''m returning home," replied Ahmad. "Are you aware of President Trump''s executive orders regarding Muslims?" asked the border guard. "Yes. But I''m not from one of the seven nations in the order. Also I am an American citizen," replied Ahmad. "What are your thoughts on the order?" asked the border guard. "The United States has the right to protect itself." "And what are your thoughts on President Trump?" asked the board guard. "Well... certainly I feel the same way about him that you do," replied Ahmad. "If that were true, I''d have to arrest you," replied the border guard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Kevin O''Leary was running in a leadership race I''m just not sure if it''s in Canada or the US', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say good things come in threes... Try telling that to someone with Down Syndrome', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a champagne cork back in the bottle? I don''t know, ask a Falcons fan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Invisible Zeppelin? A Hiddenburg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('my wife has sick tits she has breast cancer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] Women have a new form a birth control She''ll fuck a guy real hard and then about half-way through lay on her back and then take it up the ass. It''s called *The Falcon Method*.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Alzheimer''s patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL in 1892 a man was investigated for never having taken a bowel movement in his life. They called him "No shit Sherlock"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do behind your wife''s back? Doggystyle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a man in a wheelchair is having dinner at a restaurant. The waiter comes over and asks: "Would you like a glass of wine"? To this the man replies: "No thanks, I''m driving".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First Harrison Ford got cast as Han Solo... then he got cast as Han Solo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All these Trump jokes... that he''ll never understand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the sex move called the Tom Brady? I''m not sure of the specific mechanics but, you cum from behind FTW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new study has revealed that diarrhea is actually based on heredity They found if runs in your jeans', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m tired of people talking about how strong ants are. I can pick up a leaf too, who cares.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was young, I used to have an obsession with Posh Spice Which cost my mum a fortune in saffron', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning eating my breakfast... Just cereal, i was looking at the missing person part on the milk carton, and i had seen many of these before but some reason this one caught my eye, it read "Lilly, missing 2 weeks blonde hair, blue eyes, always happy". A few days later im sat in my office on the 50th floor and i look out of my window and i see a blue tarp held by duct tape but had fallen down slightly, and inside was a little girl on a matress with her hands tied. I instantly remembered the girl on the milk carton, blonde hair, yes, blue eyes, oh my god yeah, always happy, well she was crying her fucking eyes out, no way that its her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the charges being pressed on the mineral? It was assault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say history repeats itself... But I never expected it to repeat itself so soon, let alone at the superbowl! I haven''t seen a lead blown so bad since Hillary''s 2016 Campaign!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In honor of the Bowling Green Massacre, wear a green ribbon . . . . . . or, perhaps more appropriately, some color you made up in your head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the most productive pants? Participants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to an institute of botanical research the other day, but they only had one type of mushroom It was a shiitake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eating clocks is not that difficult. It''s just very time-consuming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Do You Cut Down A Tree? A sawwwwwwww Dude', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you ever see hippos hiding in trees? Because they''re really good at it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone were dying, except joseph He kept stalin his death', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you explain destiny to a child of divorced parents? Tell them their custody is in their hands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady now has a perfect track record. He''s won 5/7 Superbowls he''s been in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What American State sells small pop cans? Mini-Soda (Minnesota)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the penguin break up with the walrus? Because they were polar opposites.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the people living next door to the tennis factory call the cops? Because they were making a racquet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I will sing of the blessings of the Lord. During the Testimony period in a church service, The 16 year old Pastor''s daughter stood up and said: "Praise the Lord!" Everybody shouted with joy, "Hallelujah!" She continued:"Since the age of 13, I''ve been experiencing serious pain and bleeding every month and it was unbearable. At times it would last 3-5 days. But now, after a series of Bible studies with Brother Solomon in his house, the monthly pain and blood flow have stopped for more than 3 months now. No more pain, no more bleeding. You can even see I''m getting fatter and prettier. And I''m believing God to perfect my healing as we have started to pray seriously about the small problem of vomiting, especially in the morning. Praise the Lord!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Poop is named Poop Because when you say it your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when you poop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stolen car A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling Back and forth. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches, "Can I help you Sir?" "Yessh! Ssssomebody ssstole my carrr", the man replies. The cop asks, "Where was your car the last time you saw it?" "It wasss on the end of thisshh key", the man replies. About that time the cop looks down and sees the man''s wiener hanging out of his fly for all the world to see. He asks the man, "Sir, are you aware that you are exposing yourself?" Momentarily confused, the drunk looks down at his crotch and without missing a beat, blurts out.... "Holy shit! My girlfriend''s gone, too!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golf balls A man got on the bus with both of his front trouser pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde. The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many glances from her, he said, "It''s golf balls." The blonde continued to look at him for a very long time, thinking deeply about what he had said. Finally, unable to contain her curiosity any longer, she asked, "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow..?" :)=(=(=(=(=(=(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just watched an Imam trying to perform a tracheotomy on a Labrador while free-falling at 10,000 feet... ... I''m not sure extreme vetting for Muslims is such a good idea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black guy in a library asked me where the colored printer was I replied, "Dude, it''s 2017, you can use any printer you want."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Uncle Jack got stuck on a roof Would you help your Uncle Jack off?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s no wonder falcons are an endangered species They''ve got an extreme choking problem.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dinosaur Why can''t dinosaurs clap their hands? because they''re dead!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Nancy Sinatra say about her actor friend Christopher''s custom-made footwear? These boots are made for Walken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack - Bro do you know newton''s second law? Jhonny - I am a Science student bro! not a Law student.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a copy of the Kama Sutra to spice things up in the bedroom with my girlfriend... ...unfortunately, it wouldn''t fit inside her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the penguin say when he walked into the bar ouch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an invisible black man? Incog-negro', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scottish, fedora-wearing art professor complimented his Scandinavian student. "Nice skies, Finnish lass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do people who praise WiFi go? The promised LAN.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And God said unto John, "Come forth, and you shall receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to tell an estate agent is lying? Their lips will be moving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s so unfair that people are still judged by the color of their skin. If you want a tattoo, you should be able to get a tattoo and not worry about what people think.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Santa without both his arms?... ***Can''t Applause...***', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats green and smells of pork? Kermit''s fingers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Donald Trump converted to Judaism? He heard that Vladimir Putin likes to drink vodka with orange jews.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear the capital of Sweden really sucks.... But no one can leave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so stupid She tells her kids yo mamma jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Queen Elizabeth has been on the Throne for 65 years That''s one hell of a dodgy curry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the veterinarian who caught laryngitis? He is mostly just a hoarse doctor now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me to take a spider out instead of kill it. We went and had drinks. Cool guy, wants to be a web designer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a plane carrying yesterday''s Superbowl officials called? Jet LI.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Falcons Rise Up every year..... lose every year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots are like a giant dick. Everyone that tries to take them on, ends up choking.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit, I know the cure to cancer [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Atlanta Falcons throw their 28-3 lead in the Super Bowl? They realized that if they won they''d have to visit President Trump in the Whitehouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which vegetable is kind of rad? Radish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today in class we were sayin synonoms.. And my friend said "Donald Trump and Idiot!". My teacher wrote it down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much room is needed for fungi to grow? As mushroom as possible.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear Atlanta is getting a new mascot? Hillary Clinton', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair... Deep down I knew she''d come crawling back to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey! What''s up? A heartwarming animated film about a boy, an old man, and his dog who all fly away to an exotic place in a balloon house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just got over 15 Valentines cards! It left me breathless... The security guard at the Hallmark store gave quite a chase.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To be Frank... I''d have to change my name', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I submitted my DNA for genetic testing and the lab wrote back that I''m related to Donald Trump! I guess that''s what I get for using 24 and me . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump orange? Because he is ripe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We used to live on a very busy main road. But after our 4th child got run over, we decided to move in to a house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If pros and cons were opposites.... Then wouldn''t Congress be the opposite of progress?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Obama get two terms as President? Because every black man gets a longer sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a ginger and a vegetable? One''s brain dead and the other is good for you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have 3 heads, 4 legs, 6 hands and 416 fingers, what am I? A liar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was the most Superbowlly Super Bowl ever *Super Bowl LI', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do hobbit homes with no entrances need? More doors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I prefer guys who make small dick jokes about themselves over those who make big dick jokes about themselves. "Well, I have a medium dick. It can talk to ghosts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my bowels like I like my women... Loose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In breaking news, Trump''s personal library has burned down The fire consumed both books and in a tragic twist he hadn''t even finished coloring the second one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is your favorite rapper? Mine is Bill Cosby, WAIT no I meant favorite RAPER not rapper, my bad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone told me that I''m a narcissist today I told them its everyone else that has a problem', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A chemist auditioned for the play He got a 82 role!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Looking at you is like looking at Chernobyl "Why, because I''m radiantly beautiful?" "No because you''re a fucking disaster."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bet all the Falcon''s fans out there are feeling a bit... deflated. ^[hangs ^head ^in ^shame]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mad scientist is showing off his newest invetion to his henchman "Behold! This wrist-mounted device shows me my exact location and speed within the fourth dimension!" "Looks kinda like a wristwatch to me Boss."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear an unfunny joke? "No" Too late.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Goku has a big chance to... Go coo at a bird.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a large dog that meditates? Aware wolf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had Patriots Sex this morning. That''s where you cum from behind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a monster? Terrier-fied!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You hear about that failed drug dealer? He couldn''t cut it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in a restaurant when... A man asked ''Who knows CPR?'' And I said, ''I know all the letters of the alphabet!'' And we all laughed, And laughed, And laughed, Except one guy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Jeffrey Dahmer move to a larger apartment? He needed more leg room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What isn''t a better love story than Twilight? Donald and Ivanka.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay drive by? A fruit-rollup', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We got 6 inches of snow last night and I''m the only one to show up to work today You''d think these pussies would like 6 inches', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is leaving me because of my mental illness. At least thats what the cat told me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did you call a Mexican snake? Hisssspanic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad doesnt trust anyone, in fact he has a saying about it But he wouldnt tell me Credits: Anthony Jeselnik', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two sewing machines were walking down the road... As they pass by each other one says to the other "Hey are you that Singer?". The other replies "Janome?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What medical condition are elderly bats most afraid of? Incontinence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dancing Latina with a yeast infection? Macarena and cheese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a couch and a black person? Couch can support a family of five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a pigeon explode? Convert it to islam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently breastfeeding hurts Which is sucky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The NFL decides to put on a barnyard show Eli Manning says, "*New York City has the best breakfast egg sandwiches so I''ll play the chicken.*" Aaron Rodgers says, "*Wisconsin has the best cheese so I''ll play the cow.*" Tom Brady says, "*We just won five Super Bowls so I''ll be the GOAT.*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8th anniversary Our 8th anniversary was approaching and my wife pointed out that it was the bronze anniversary. She suggested that we both get something for each other that fit this theme, but not something dumb. She said she''d like me to put a lot of thought into it. I replied, "So you want the brains and the bronze?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Austin Powers: Jimi Hendrix deceased, drugs. Austin Powers: Jimi Hendrix deceased, drugs. Janis Joplin deceased, alcohol. Mama Cass deceased, ham sandwich. Atlanta Falcons, deceased, choked on a 25 point lead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (' I pulled you over today because do you know how fast you were going today, sir? "I definitely was not driving as fast as you, officer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old grumpy lady gets in a bus. She hijacks the speaker and yells : "All of you that sit on the left side of this bus are assholes ! The ones sitting on the right are sons of bitches !!!" A man rise and answers : "Mrs. This is absolutely unacceptable, i''m not an asshole !" "**THEN GET ON THE OTHER SIDE YOU SON OF A BITCH !**"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife in their sixties were coming up on their 40th wedding anniversary. Knowing his wIfe loved antiques, he bought a beautiful old brass oil lamp for her. When she unwrapped it, a genie appeared. He thanked them and gave each of them one wish. The wife wished for an all expenses paid, first class, around the world cruise with her husband. Shazam! Instantly she was presented with tickets for the entire journey, plus expensive side trips, dinners, shopping, etc. The husband, however, wished he had a female companion who was 30 years younger. Shazam! Instantly he turned 93 years old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the Atlanta Falcons locker room to get some change for a dollar... But they only gave me 3 quarters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Scientists Walk Into a Bar The first scientist says "I''ll have some H2O" The second scientist then proceeds to grab a stool from the bar and throw it at his colleague, realising that the first scientist was trying to murder him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If only Jason Pierre Paul played for the Patriots instead of the Giants... He would be the first NFL player to have a ring on every finger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Mexico''s National Animal? The drug mule.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did the king keep his armies? In his sleevies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a dirty bird and a dirty tub? A DIRTY TUB HAS A RING!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old prostitutes are sitting on a porch reminiscing about the good old days... One asks: "Have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?" The other one replies: "No, but I''ve been swung by the tits a few times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone running behind a car gets exhausted Someone running in front of a car gets tired', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you wake Lady Gaga from a Nap? Poker Face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son didn''t take his kleptomania medication this morning. He took mine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God said to Adam "I''m going to make you a woman" God: "She''s going to clean for you, cook anything you want whenever you want it, always look beautiful, never be bad tempered, give you children, always obedient, and she''ll never argue with you." Adam: "That sounds great, but what''ll it cost me?" God: "Oh, an arm and a leg." Adam: "That''s a bit steep. What can I get for a rib?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Atlanta quarterback should become a baseball pitcher... He''s great at throwing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a Super Bowl joke? The Atlanta Falcons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought some shoes from a drug dealer I''m Ng sure what he laced them with but I''ve been tripping all day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Free hoover It''s just collecting dust', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is free Wi-Fi never seen in churches? Because no church wants to be challenged by an invisible power that actually works.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How could anybody be a masochist? Beats me...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English man, Irish man and Scottish man... Are on a plane and the pilot comes out and issues everyone a challange, "if you can guess where we are by sticking your hand out of the window ill give you 50 grand" the Scottish man quickly jumps up and sticks his hand out of the window "we are in Dundee" he guessed, the pilot shakes his head. Then the Irish man trys "we are in Dublin" he guesses, again the pilot shakes his head, then the English man steps up, "we are in Liverpool" he says, shocked the pilot answers "Yes! Thats right, but how did you know?" The English man replies "because my watch has been stolen"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m changing my name to Lead So I have a pretty good chance of someone blowing me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage certificate. WIFE: "Honey, what are you doing?" HUSBAND: "I''m reading our marriage certificate" WIFE: "What for?" HUSBAND: "I''m looking for the expiry date..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl wanted me to maker her scream with two fingers. So I poked her in both eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage counselor. A married couple come to the marriage counselor. The wife complains: "We were having a perfect marriage, until his girlfriend started dating my boyfriend..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Ace Pilot An ace pilot was up in his plane during his down time doing all sorts of tricks. He gets a furious call from his squadron leader on the ground saying "Get that plane back in the hangar NOW!" So, the pilot flies down to the hangar but he doesn''t land. He flies in one side of the hangar, comes out the other, turns around and does it again. The squadron leader calls again and says "I told you to get that plane back in the hangar!" The pilot replies "I had it in there twice! Why didn''t someone shut the door while I was in there?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear the best Irish joke ever? Dry weather.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('His future is not that bright One evening a man comes to a witch so she can predict his future. The witch starts: "Oh dark forces, let me look into the future of this poor man." Then she continues " Oh I can see big Villa with a beautiful garden, naked women, big pool, and I can also see you, my dear." The man, really happy to hear all this, asks. "This is amazing, what am I doing there?" The Witch replies " I can see you gazing at all these through a hole in a fence".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Booze man Little Johny comes to his drunk uncle: -Uncle, you should stop drinking -Ahh Johny, I am too old to stop now. -But, Uncle, it is never too late to stop. -Then I have plenty of time before I stop, my dear Johny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow with Parkinsons? Beef Jerky', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald trump takes The New England Patriots out on his Yacht to celebrate their latest Super Bowl victory. The Yacht sinks and America is great again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anne has a will... Anne Hathaway', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you crucify a spastic? On a swastika.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i''ve got a Liszt of great composer puns that''s Haydn in my closet somewhere... i could look Bach there and read it to you, but i don''t think you could Handel it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between dubstep and any other kind of electronic music? In the middle of a dubstep track, Optimus Prime takes a dump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Cardinal say when he saw the Pope had forgot to flush? Holy shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peety the Dog A man''s best friend, Peety the dog, is old and isn''t feeling well so he takes him to the vet. The vet looks the dog over and tells the man that there''s nothing much they can do for Peety. The man explains how long he and Peety have been together and how much the dog means to him and asks the vet if there''s anything else he can do for the dog. So the vet brings in a cat, who walks around and checks Peety out and finally looks up the vet and just shakes his head, and Peety passes away. A month later the man gets his bill from the vet for $350 and he asks the vet, how come the bill is so much. Whenever you''ve treated Peety before, the bill was only $50. Why was it so much this time. The vet explains that his bill was only $50; the cat scan cost $300.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cholo bitches are arguing over who''s nails are better, and shit is ABOUT TO GO DOWN. To prevent a fight, what kind of test can you administer in this situation to determine who''s nails are actually the most fire? A "lit mas" test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman with no arms or legs.. Is crying on a bench at the beach, i approach her "hey honey, whats the matter?" i say, she looks at me tears streaming down her face "ive never had a man hug me" she says, so i sit next to her and giver a her a nice hug she again looks at me still very upset "i have never been kissed by a man" she says. So i lean in and give her a kiss on the lips, looking a little better than before she finally says "i have never been fucked" so i pick her up and wang her in the sea "now youre fucked"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Since the term "Gay" refers to people who are homosexual I guess that makes them a HOMOsapien', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boyfriend: "I bet you $100 you can''t say something that makes me both happy and sad". Girlfriend: "of all your friends, you have the biggest dick".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been talking to a 13 year old girl for about 2 weeks now We''ve been texting a lot lately and she just told me she''s an undercover cop, that''s quite impressive for her age.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Welcome to Trump''s America where the best black superbowl player is White.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The author of the book "Childish Retorts" died today. RIP Ewan Whosarmy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Difference between twins I''ve fucked a set of twins. People have asked me how hard it was to tell them apart, but it was actually quite easy. You see, Caroline was a redhead with an amazing pair of tits, And frank had a cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make lady Gaga cry? Poker face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally sent a dick pic to everyone in my address book. Not only was it embarrassing, but it also cost me a fortune in stamps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you circumcise a Trump supporter? Kick his secret gay lover in the jaw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you sure you''re the Falcons? And not the *Falcants?*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was addicted to the hokey pokey... But I turned myself around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beer is like the sun Beer is like the Sun. It rises in the yeast, and sets in the waist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is spongebob great at high pressure situations? Because he can soak up the pressure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wise Italian Grandfather An old Italian man in Brooklyn is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside, "Guido, I wan'' you lissina me. I wan'' you to take-a my chrome plated .38 revolver so you will always remember me." "But grandpa, I really don''t like guns. How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?" "You lissina me, boy! Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos. " "Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man. Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, Time''s up!'' "?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Is Undeniably The Most Hated Thing In The Community Garden? A Dick Tator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked her 6th Grade class how many of them were Trump fans... A teacher asked her 6th grade class how many of them were Trump fans. Not really knowing what a Trump fan is, but wanting to be liked by their teacher, all the kids raised their hands except for Little Johnny. The teacher asked Little Johnny why he has decided to be different... again. Little Johnny said, "Because I''m not a Trump fan." The teacher asked, "Why aren''t you a fan of Trump?" Johnny said, "Because I''m a Democrat." The teacher asked him why he''s a Democrat. Little Johnny answered, "Well, my Mom''s a Democrat and my Dad''s a Democrat, so I''m a Democrat." Annoyed by this answer, the teacher asked, "If your mom was a moron and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?" With a big smile, Little Johnny replied, "That would make me a Trump fan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('School is like my baby boy... It hasn''t worked right since I dropped it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The "American Dream" was discussed in class the other day... ... the professor turned to the German foreign exchange student and asked if they had anything like that in Germany to which he responded, "We did, but nobody liked it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the point of Jewish football? Getting the quarter back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overtime is a curse word in retail.* *And the Atlanta Falcons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The last time the Reds had a collapse this big West and East Berlin became united', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I forgot how to throw a boomerang but then it came back to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The patriots may have won the super bowl... But the Falcons won the popular vote', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Falcons return to Atlanta tomorrow Guess the walking dead will be back sooner than we thought', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Andrew Johnson say when he was inaugurated into office after Walt Whitman wrote his poem? I''m the Captain Now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of party did the Donners have? A meat and greet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a rat and a prostitute? One''s a cunning runt, the other is a running cunt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a cold Its snot good.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl is fucking her boyfriend. At her parents house. Her father after being woken by the noises goes upstairs to check it out, and walks in on them. "Dad!" she exclaimed in a panic "...I''m sorry" The dad being a dad replies "hi sorry, I''m Dad!" He then turns to the boyfriend and asks "Are you fucking sorry?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to send her nudes... ...But the file size was too big.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s a urologist''s favorite jazz singer? Urethra Franklin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peter Dinklage should open a BBQ restaurant Called "Pig Me"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I haven''t seen a lead blown this badly since Hilary''s 2016 campaign.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Hillary and the falcons have in common? They both blew it in the last quarter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the ground all white after Custer''s Last Stand? Because the Indians kept coming and coming and coming... **Courtesy of Stephen King''s "The Stand"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the Falcons have in common with Democrats? They both won the popular vote but lost to Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar ...and says "ouch" Someone should move that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man drives over his wife who''s fault is it? The mans, he shouldn''t have been driving in the kitchen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need to pass my exams So I decided to join the Falcons. They pass even when they shouldn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know why Matt Ryan still single He has a choking fetish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New Job Opening! Atlanta Falcons Defensive Coordinator No experience needed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Devil went down to Georgia . . . And obviously reneged on his deal with Falcons fans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think if I saw God strangle Satan right now... ...it would only be the second biggest choke I''ve seen tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who choked harder the Golden State Warriors or the Atlanta Falcons? Hillary Clinton', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dark humor is like food, not everybody gets it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abreva The official sponsor of the Lombardi Trophy procession... and all other major sports trophies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The New England Patriots are perfect. Perfect 5/7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady and I have one thing in common, We are both now overqualified for our jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican triathlon team is already being picked as the favorites for gold in the 2020 Olympics. All of their best runners and swimmers are soon returning home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This day will go down in Falcons history..... The day the Falcons won the popular, but lost the electoral.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got into a fight with my father when I told him Jim Morrison wasn''t talented. He forced me to go to my room. I slammed my door behind me, and my dad said, "Don''t you ever slam The Doors in my house again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Falcons choke on after halftime? Deflated balls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golden State Warriors "No one can choke harder than we did." Atlanta Falcons "Hold my beer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why must you hurry when having sex with your fat fiance on top? It''s a pressing engagement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom Brady needs to improve... He needs to touch-up on his touchdowns.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what Trump and the Patriots have in common? Everyone hates them both, but they both win!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the best way to fuck up anything? Take it to Atlanta.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To save time we should shorten POTUS to POS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Super Bowl Guess the Falcons were seeing how far hard they could throw a game, not a football...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I haven''t seen a team blow a win this bad... Since Hitler invaded Russia', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The last time a group of New Englanders destroyed Atlanta this badly Sherman marched to the sea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Congratulations to Tom Brady, the first player to be undefeated over 5+ Super Bowls. He''s won all 5/7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t let this Superbowl distract you... from the fact that the Warriors blew a 3-1 lead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dady, what is in between mummy''s legs? - A paradise. - And what''s between your''s? - The key. - So you should change the lock, because our neighbour has a passkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Hacker say to his girlfriend? "I''m in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend keeps saying "Cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck in an underground hole full of water" I know he means well...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said that having sex on holiday was the best It certainly wasn''t the best postcard I''ve ever received', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Irish man goes to the builders merchant He picks up a tin of paint and brings it over to the counter. The woman behind the till scans it though and said ''would you like a bag for that.'' He says: ''ah no it''s fine in the tin.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which came first? The chicken or the egg? Chicken, the egg just laid there and took it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sex toy salesman from the US takes a business trip to Canada The border agent asks "are you going to Canada for business or pleasure". The salesman responds with "I''m here for the business of pleasure".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots can still win... By Electoral College votes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God is everywhere. That''s why Morgan Freeman is in every seat of the plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hope Tom and Gisele weren''t planning on having more kids. He''s already firing blanks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get football.... At the beginning of the game, they flip a quarter to see who kicks off first. Then the rest of the game everybody just keeps trying to "get the quarter back". I mean, it''s just a quarter, what''s the big deal!?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The fence and the hurricane There was a hurricane; the aftermath was horrible There was one man who''s only property damage was his fence. So he called the carpenter; and he came over. Man: "how bad is it?" Carpenter: "I salvaged some of it but you''re going to need to buy some new posts; and I''ve got other work to attend to so find someone else to do it" Man: "can you suggest someone?" Carpenter: "I heard /r/jokes is good at reposting"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Rooster So this farmer has a rooster named Fabio. The farmer walks out one day and Fabio is humping a duck The farmer looks over at Fabio and says " Fabio one of these days you are going to screw yourself to death" The next day the farm walks out and sees Fabio humping his goat''s leg " Fabio one of these days you are going to screw yourself to death" On the 3rd day the farmer walks out to find Fabio humping his horses leg " Fabio one of these days you are going to screw yourself to death" Finally on the 4th day the farmer walks out to see vultures circling in the air. Fabio lay there dead. The farmer exclaims " I told you that one of these days you were going to screw yourself to death and now look, you''ve gone an done it" At that point Fabio pops his head up slightly to look at the farmer and says "**SHHHH** they are about to land"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wonder why dogs get mad when you blow in their faces but as soon as you put them in a car they stick their head out the window.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What s the difference between a pizza and a jew The pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an educated tube? and other science jokes! Q: What DO you call an educated tube? A:A graduated cylinder Q:Why did the bear dissolve in water? A:It was polar Q: How did the English major define microtome? A: A small book... Q: Why can`t you trust atoms? A: They make up everything! Q: Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip? A: To get to the same side! Q: Why should you use chromosomes in advertisements? A: Because, you know, sex cells. I...what am I doing with my life? A: Procastination!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots The pats shoulda subbed Bush in, he got more yards on that wheelchair than Blount did all game. #riseup', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you buy a bigger bed... You have more bed room but less bedroom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many black people does it take to start a riot? Negative 1', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Patriots are like the "German Engineering" of NFL teams But even the Germans make mistakes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My granddad always did say that we were too reliant on technology... I replied, "No, you are grandpa." As I unplugged his life support', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1000 degree fidget spinner vs my neck. The result kept my head rolling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop threatened to detain me for impersonating a police officer Apparently, "you can''t arrest me, I''m a police officer!" wasn''t a very good answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once dated a girl who had no pubic hair. She insists she didn''t shave or wax and said she wouldn''t even be able to afford the supplies on her allowance anyways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump goes parachuting... Donald Trump decides that being president is tiring and decides to take a vacation. He decides to go parachuting at a resort in Florida. After the pilot straps Donald Trump''s parachute onto him, the pilot says "3,2,1... and go!" and Donald Trump jumps of the plane. As he enjoys the view below him, he says, "Finally, a joke on /r/jokes where I don''t die!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best kind of fisherman? A master baiter. Lel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say Trump is like Hitler.. except he''s not because Hitler actually had a good healthcare plan...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am looking for a Bank which can perform two things.. give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember to always check you''re grammar. I''m sorry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you listen in on a butt dial... Is it called tapping that ass?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is it just me... or does Tom Brady look really deflated right now?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never knock on Death''s door... Ring the bell and run, he hates that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And then the fight started. A son asked his mother the following question: ''Mom, why are wedding dresses white?'' The mother looks at her son and replies: ''Son, this shows your friends and relatives that your bride is pure.'' The son thanks his Mom and goes off to double-check this with his father. ''Dad why are wedding dresses white?'' The father looks at his son in surprise and says: ''Son, all household appliances come in white..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of cameras do police officers in the USA like? Point and Shoot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I totally forgot the Super Bowl was tonight! Don''t worry; so did the ~~Patriots~~ Falcons. EDIT: Well, this is awkward.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Tom Brady''s favorite sexual activity? Deflatio', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today my brother and i tried some new water It wasn''t bad just basic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No one knows what Lady Gaga is going to do during the Super Bowl... Because you can''t read her poker face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t believe in conspiracy theories I think conspiracy theorists are secretly working together to brainwash us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Watching the super bowl and my wife asks me who I''m cheering for. Wife: "who are you cheering for?" Me: "the Falcons." Wife: "are those the red people?" Me: "they''re called Native Americans now, you racist".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom am I handsome? Son:. Mom, am I handsome? Mother:. I don''t know, ask your girlfriend. Son: But ,I don''t have a girlfriend. Mother: Then you have your answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five Horses Is Her Name A man asked an American Indian what was his wife''s name. He replied, "She is called Five Horses". The man said, "That''s an unusual name for a wife. What does it mean?" The Old Indian answered, "It old Indian name. It mean ..." "NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG, NAG!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a box of chocolates.... Empty cause I am fat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In what location are additional entry ways always in demand? Mordor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the largest super bowl of them all? Forty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I''ll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I''ll have an H2O too" He died shortly after.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard this one from my grandpa There is a white kid an asian kid and a black kid playing together on a playground at school all in the second grade. The white kid asks if they want to play a game called whose penis is bigger and they all agree. So the asian kid whips it out, the other kids say "not bad not bad" Next the white kid whips his out, and they all agree that it''s bigger than the asian kids Finally, the black kid whips his out and the other two kids are in awe at how much bigger his is So when the black kid gets home his mother asks him how his day went, and he told her about the game he played with his friends and how he won. So he asked her if it was because he was black. The mom looked at him and said "no, it''s because your thirteen"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What have an Ostrich, a Pelican, and the tax man got in common? They can all stick their bills up their arse. (Credit: Billy Connolly)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do some African-Americans have afros? Because it''s in their hairitage', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mushroom walks into a bar... Bartender says, "We don''t serve mushrooms." Mushroom says, "But I''m a fun guy." Bartender says, "I just said we don''t serve fungi." Mushroom says, "No, no, not ''fungi'', ''fun guy.'' I made a pun." Bartender says, "Get the fuck out of my bar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve seen lots of things on the Super Bowl over the years, like boobs... But this year takes the cake with seeing two bushes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandma just asked me, "Son, what''s your retirement plan?" I said, "It''s you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took my girlfriend to see her first football game... After the game, I asked her what she thought. She said she liked it, but didn''t quite know what all the big to-do was about. Puzzled, I asked her what she meant. She replied: "Well, I keep hearing ''Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!'' It''s only 25 cents, why all the fighting?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you all hear about the sick Chemist? If they don''t Helium or Curium soon they''ll have to Barium', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t like to blow my own trumpet. Which is probably why I got removed from the school orchestra.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard my friend making bird puns and thought... Toucan play at that game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Pepsi delivery drivers who were fired? They tested positive for coke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the trilobite say to his girlfriend while they were eating? "Can I trilobite of your food?" P.S. - my eleven year old sister came up with this', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told myself I would stop drinking But I''m not about to listen to some retard who talks to himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a kind of totally tubular vegetable yesterday... It was a rad-ish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to lose weight while still eating fast food? Buy food from England, you tend to lose a few pounds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When A Teacher Asks You If You Did Your Homework Teacher: Did you do your homework? Student: Did you grade my test? Teacher:I have other students'' tests to grade. Student: I have other teachers'' homework to do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the Buddhist sad when he was asked to send his resume to the company as a word document via email? Attachment leads to suffering.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the New York Times!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a magician cry? You make his family disappear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A turtle is walking across the yard . . . Three snails come up and mug him. Later the cops are asking questions about the mugging: "Can you describe your attackers?" The turtle responds, "I don''t know, it all happened so fast . . ."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy loses an eye on a fishing trip with his friends As he is laying in the hospital bed surrounded by all his family and friends after the surgery, his best friend rushes in the room and says: -I have great news!! I just ran into the doctor and he said you''re not going to lose your eye! Everybody in the room turns around and the wounded man asks -Are you serious?! -Yeah! The doctor said he''s going to put it in a jar with Formaldehyde and you get to keep it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the deaf teacher give his deaf students their homework? He assigned it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have evidence that the mods on r/jokes are censoring posts they dont like! More info in post! [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When robots transform, they turn into cars. But what do cars turn into? Laneways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish i had 2 cars. One delorean and some other car. I would usually drive with the latter, and with delorean only from time to time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You won''t believe what this group of teenage girls did! JK, that was just clique-bait', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say 1 in 10 people live next to a child sex offender Fortunately for me, I live next to two sexy 13 year olds!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what pisses redditors off? [deleted] ... and reposts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that the Energizer Bunny was arrested? It''s ok; he wasn''t charged.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to share everything with you. Man: I want to share everything with you. Woman: Lets start from your bank account.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eventually, all hipsters will age and end up needing canes to help them walk... ...ironically.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: I''ll take a rum and coke Bartender: Is pepsi ok? Man: Yeah, that''ll do. Bartender: *hands him coke and pepsi*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator. DA DUM TSS.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hat for kirk My mum wanted to knit a hat for Captain Kirk of the USS enterprise, but it is quite tricky for someone who has three ears! His left ear, his right ear and his final front-ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The truth needs to be told. I tried to stay out of the conversation, but can''t restrain my feelings any longer. That incredibly arrogant man who cheated his way to victory and now thinks that he can impose his will on the entirety of America. He and his gorgeous foreign-born former model wife. And those angry, bitter people that he represents. No matter how many scandals and lawsuits he gets involved in, he still flaunts his obnoxious smile into our tv screens. A majority of Americans cannot stand you! You may fancy yourself the greatest patriot, but your days in power are numbered! Go away Tom Brady, go away!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: "I''m sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and only have 10 to live" Patient: "What? 10 What? Years? Weeks?!!" Doctor: "Nine"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God was talking to Adam... And told him, "I will make you a wonderful partner. Her name will be Wonderful. She will cook all your meals, wash your clothes, clean up after you, agree with everything you say, and best of all, she will never complain". "That''s great" said Adam. "What will she cost me?" "An arm and a leg" Adam thinks for a minute, then says "What can I get for a rib?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond and a brunette was watching the news Showing was a man standing on top of a tall building yelling that he''s gona jump. The brunette looks at the blond and says "I bet you 200 dollars that guy is gona jump" The blond thinks for a few seconds and takes the bet. A few seconds later the man jumps off the building and just smashes into the car parked at the bottom of the building. The blond fondles in her hand bag and hands over the 200dollars. The next day the Brunette meets up with the blond again and hands her back the money explaining. "I''m sorry, I can''t take your money, I''ve watched that news story the day before. I knew he was going to jump." The blond replied : "No keep the money, I also watched it the day before. I just didn''t think he''d do it again"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arjun the Indian wife-beater punches his wife every night at 7 PM On the dot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most annoying thing about an aging hipster? He fucked your mom before it was popular.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do trans-people go invisible when they have kids? They become trans-parent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time is it when you have $1.25? A quarter past four.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people dont like meatloaf... But if you listen to his songs, 2 out of 3 aint bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl? You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never trust shrimp They''re full of shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you pick up an elephant with one hand? You can''t. Elephants don''t have hands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The chicken was acquitted of murder... ... because there was no evidence of fowl-play.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your family tree must be a cactus. Because everyone on it is a prick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife asks her husband, "what would he do if she died"? Husband: "I would go insane!" Wife: "Would you remarry?" Husband: "I don''t know. You can''t predict what an insane person would do."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#3335 I first heard this one from my brother when I was twelve and it''s been a favorite ever since!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why will all of the referees check their voicemail immediately after the Super Bowl? So they can hear someone say "no missed calls"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wise Chinese monk once said, "If the dog barks... it''s not cooked well enough."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say, have you heard the joke about the pizza without the sauce? Well, it goes like- Nevermind, it''s too cheesy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who speaks 3 languages? Trilingual. What do you call someone who speaks 2 languages? Bilingual. What do you call someone who speaks 1 language? French.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do men like bacon? Because they''re pigs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard this one at my great aunt''s funeral A young boy and his friend are attending mass at the boy''s parish. His friend has never been to a church service before. As they pass through the vestibule the young boy dips his hand into the holy water and makes the sign of the cross. Confused, his friend asks "What''s that mean?" "I''m blessing myself before entering God''s house" replied the young boy. The two children walk down the aisle and stop at the front pew. The young boy genuflects before sitting down. Again, confused, his friend asks "What''s that mean?" "I''m humbling myself before Christ''s Tabernacle" replies the young boy. Soon the pastor arrives and the service begins. After the opening prayers and the readings the priest removes his watch from his wrist, places it upward facing on the pulpit, and begins his sermon. The friend asks "What''s that mean?" "Not a damn thing" the young boy replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Jimmy asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom. "Yes, but you have to recite the alphabet first." "But teacher, it''s an emergency!" "Just tell me the alphabet first and you can go. "A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O Q R S T U V W X Y Z." "Where''s the P?" "It''s all over your MOM''S FACE you retarded bitch! Lol owned"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to Cinderella after the ball? She choked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Mexico''s national sport? Cross country', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the Energizer Bunny sent to jail? Domestic battery', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Steve jobs would have been a better president than Donald Trump. But its a silly comparison really, its like comparing apples to oranges.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who backed into an airplane propeller? Disaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What sound does a 747 make when it lands? Boeing! Boeing! Boeing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a Christian I can''t Believe there are Billy Idol Cover Bands The Bible is very clear that we should not have False Idols', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 mothers are sitting around having coffee and talking about their children. The brunette mom says, "I was going through my daughters room the other day and found a bottle of vodka, I can''t believe my daughter drinks!" The red head mom says, " that''s nothing, I was going through my daughters room the other day and found a bag of Marijuana, I can''t believe my daughter does drugs!" The blonde mom says, "I got that beat. I was going through my daughters room the other day and found a box of condoms, I can''t believe my daughter has a penis!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... and a table... and a chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you take the i out of waiter? A ban from the restaurant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Think Recursion There are two kinds of people in the world, ones who divide the world into two kinds of people and ones who do not.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a deer with no eyes? I have no ideer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever use an expensive toothbrush? It''s breath-taking', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was born without a body... His mother carried him around when she went out. Ever time she walked to the grocery store they would pass the playground. He saw children laughing and playing and he wanted so badly to be able to join them. Every night he wished for a body to go play with the other children. To his surprise one morning he woke up to find that he could stand, and walk and play, his dream came true! He ran down the stairs and flung the door open and bolted down the road toward the playground. Just as he crossed the road his face beaming, oblivious to the oncoming traffic, a bus tried to swerve and miss him but it was to late. The boy was crushed by the bus from the neck down, only his head remained. The moral of the story is that in life it is better to stay ahead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And God said to man, "I will put obediant women on all corners of the world," then laughed as he made the world a ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Help me To whoever has my voodoo doll, please scratch between my butt cheeks. I''m in public. Thanks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Trump keep marrying immigrants? Because no Americans were willing to take the job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Sasquatch in mud? Dirty Hairy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How will Tom Brady feel if the Patriots lose? Deflated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blue films are the most Positive Movies.... No violence , No conspiracy, No Cheating... !! Lots of Love & always a very Happy Ending for all Characters!! Lots of religious reference "oh god, oh my god, oh my god" Good co-operation, Good co-ordination, natural acting, No language problem...And the best part the actor''s as well as audience are satisfied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A psychiatrists secretary walked into his study... And said, "There''s a gentleman in the waiting room asking to see you. Claims he''s invisible." The psychiatrist responded... "Tell him I can''t see him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have a good day When I greeted my boss in the morning, he told me to have a good day. Who am I to argue? So I thanked him and went back home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you kill a clown? Stab it repeatedly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Very Funny beautiful girl was a college student. Once Very Funny Girl comes late to class. Teacher: Why are you late? Very Funny Girl : One boy was following me, sir. Teacher: So, What? Very Funny Girl : That boy was walking very slow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you can a pile of cats? A meowtian of pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife complained that our sex life was boring I replied with "Well honey, if the same thing every three days works for r/jokes, it should be good enough for you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sticky? A brown stick **slaps knee** Wakka wakka wakka!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guys... I don''t think Trump is really our president... He might just be Putin us on!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I decided not to have children... The kids are taking it pretty hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frank and Ollie go to the beach wearing Speedos... FRANK: Hey Ollie, you know why we have these new Speedos, right? OLLIE: No, why? They are tight. FRANK: To pick up cute girls, they like tight swim shorts on guys like us. OLLIE: Great! I like cute girls. FRANK: Here, put this potato in your speedos to pick up the cutest girls. They will go crazy for you when they see that. OLLIE: Got it, let''s split up and meet back here in 30minutes with our cute girls. (30 minutes later) OLLIE: Hey Frank, all the girls where pointing and seemed crazy. But they all ran away. I couldn''t even talk to them. FRANK: Ollie, the potato is supposed to go in the front!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre So the barman gives her one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I scared the postman today by showing up to the door completely naked i scared the postman today by showing up to the door completely naked. im not sure what scared him more, the fact that i was naked, or that i knew where he lived', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To prevent date rape, there''s a new drug for men called Niagra Viagra Rises, Niagra falls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do riot police like to get to work early? To beat the crowd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear walks into a bar... ... goes up to the barman and says "I''d like a gin and tonic .............. and a packet of peanuts". The barman says "Sure, but why the big pause?". The bear holds up his hands and says, "These? Hey, I was born with them".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m curious what my vegetarian friend will bring to the superbowl party tonight. Hopefully it''s an apology.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I could travel back in time, I would go to the Inquisition. I heard the women had nice racks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do gorillas have such big nostrils? Big fingers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar... He sees a sign that reads, "cheese sandwich: $1.50, chicken sandwich: $2.50, hand job: $10." The man beckons to the sexy waitress and says, "are you the one who does the hand jobs?" "Yes," she purrs, "I am." "Well wash your freaking hands," the man says, "I want a cheese sandwich!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t watch the news anymore I just lie to my self and cut out the middle man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m ordering a chicken and an egg from Amazon I''ll let you know', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who do you call when a popcorn gets murdered? The pop coroner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Loving beer and wanting abs is hard So I had to cancel my gym membership due to conflict of interests', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer went into a local bar... ...and ordered a glass of champagne. The woman sitting next to him said, ''How about that? I just ordered champagne too!'' ''What a coincidence'' the farmer said. ''This is a special day for me. I''m celebrating.'' "This is a special day for me too, I am also celebrating," said the woman. ''What a coincidence!'' said the farmer. As they clinked glasses headded: ''What are you celebrating?'' ''My husband and I have been trying to have a child and today my gynecologist told me that I am pregnant!'' ''What a coincidence!'' said the man. ''I''m a chicken farmer and all last year my hens were infertile, but today they are all laying eggs again.'' ''That''s great!'' said the woman, ''How did your chickens become fertile?'' ''I used a different cock,'' he replied. The woman smiled, clinked his glass and said ''What a coincidence!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] Yesterday i was caught masturbating in the shower Bet I never get allowed in to Auschwitz again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ban pre-shredded cheese. Make America grate again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the pharmacy to buy laxatives for his wife. The man asks the pharmacists where the laxatives are so the pharmacist says "To the right, on the bottom shelf, you''ll see a green box that says Dulcolax". The man sees the box and sees a pink box right next to it saying "Woman''s laxative". The pink box was three times cheaper so the man takes the box and asks the pharmacist, what about this? This is not for me, it''s for my wife. The pharmacist replies, in that case you can take that, it''s the same shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw two names carved in a tree... I do not think its cute. On the contrary, its alarming how many people take a knife on a date.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that new, bad pizza joint? Yay, they''re getting critically panned by reviewers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Conjunctivitis.com Thats a site for sore eyes - Tim Vine, 2012', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which college football team keeps people awake at night? The long horns', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of processors do slow PCs use? Potato Chips!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Matthew McConaughey is left handed? Just kidding, he''s alright alright alright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy gets on the bus... A little boy gets on the bus and stops to talk to the driver. "Did you know if my mother was a duck and my father was a duck I''d be a baby duck"? Says the boy. "I don''t care" says the bus driver, "You''re holding up the line". The boy replies "well did you know if my mother was a bear and my father was a bear then I would be a baby bear"? Now angry that the kid has made him late the driver responds "oh yea? Well what would you be if your mother was a whore and your father was drug dealer"? The little boy looks at him and says "If my mother was a whore and my father was drug dealer then that would make me a bus driver"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer wanted to buy a new rooster to breed with his chickens... The farmer''s old rooster was getting up there in the years, so he buys a new one. The old rooster looks at the new rooster and sizes him up. "Look, sonny, I''m willing to hand over the whole henhouse to you, but you gotta prove yourself to be strong and quick. I''m gonna run, and if you can catch me, it''s about time for me to retire." The young rooster thinks it over and agrees to the contest. The old rooster runs fast, but the young rooster runs faster. Just as the young rooster is about to catch up, though -- BANG! The farmer fired a gun, killing the young rooster. "Damn it, I bought another gay rooster!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NASA''s Space Pen When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 degrees Celsius. The Russians used a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Woman Gets On The Bus With Her Baby The bus driver says: "That''s the ugliest baby that I''ve ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I''ll hold your monkey for you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the finest ingredients.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Russian dictators are the best. Theyre the crme de la Kremlin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hothead Pat, upset by how the Super Bowl is going, starts destroying things. Police get on the megaphone trying to evacuate the area: "Go, Pat riots!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a snowflake''s school grade based on? Class precipitation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of dessert makes women gain the most weight? Wedding Cake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just completed a puzzle in 6 months despite it saying 4 - 6 years on the box.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the zeros say after the election? He will not divide us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy jumped through the window. What is the subject? English literature', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best part of a lobster pizza? The **crust**acean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in a cab today and the cab driver said, "I love my job, I''m my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do..." Then I said, "turn Left".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Start typing on a laptop im not used to 4vjenp/ptth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Words of wisdom I''d rather kill myself than to commit suicide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was trying to breastfeed her son in a bus The kid throws a tantrum and refuses to suck on his mother''s breast. So in a fit, the mother tells her son, "If you don''t want this milk, I''m gonna give this to the gentleman beside us." An hour later, the kid still refused to breastfeed. So she tells her son again, "If you won''t breastfeed, I''m really gonna give this to this man beside us!" Then the guy beside them suddenly interrupted, "Please make up your mind now. My stop was 30 minutes ago."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t know the Disneyland had moved to the white house ... Apparently the president is Donald and the vice is Mickey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At what time was Justin Trudeau eaten by a monster? Ate P.M.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We need to stop animal testing our products "But shampoo and makeup companies do it" "We make dildos"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when you are studying bacteria and someone steals your sample? Cultural appropriation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientific opinions differ... on whether climate change deniers have dog or rat shit for brains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While I was on the bus, the person standing next to me played the national anthem While I was sitting on the bus, the person standing next to me played the national anthem, I stood up and he took my seat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('the flat earth society ... ... has members all around the globe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve tried to stop swearing but i cunt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when a girl wants sex and lies about being on her period Getting caught red handed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('US Representatives are like the dislike button on Youtube comments They are supposed to be there to represent your dissent and anger, but never actually do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was sitting in a diner waiting order, when I hear, "Does anyone know CPR?" I said, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed...except one guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know the old saying "Liquor before beer, in the clear; beer before liquor never sicker" As it turns out liquor before liquor before liquor is worse', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Samoan''s offended by the Samoa Girl Scout Cookie? I mean it''s not like white people care about crackers being called crackers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love to watch my guests throw up. So I always put the dartboard on the ceiling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superbowl That''s it, that is the joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the joke about Oxygen and Potassium? It was OK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love cats They taste ***just*** like chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked in to a supermarket today and noticed an attractive woman waving at me... She said hello and I was rather taken aback because I couldn''t place where I knew her from. So I asked, "Do you know me?" To which she replied, "I think youre the father of one of my kids." Now. my mind traveled back to the only time I have ever been unfaithful to my wife and I said, "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?" She looks into my eyes and said calmly, "No, Im your sons teacher."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the oxygen say to the magma? I LAVA you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross an insomniac with an atheist and a dyslexic? Someone who stays up all night, wondering if there is a file after death.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn''t hire stupid people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grammar Nazis no longer exist Their called the Alt-Write now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If humans were potatoes what would Donald Trump be called? A dick tater', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump might be the greatest salesman of all time. He sold bullshit to over 60 million people... and they bought it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the word "gay" mean? Asked a boy to his father, to which he replied, "It means happy, son". "Are you happy the Dad?" Asked the boy "No son, I have a wife"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Escaping from the men''s section of the insane asylum, the retard made his way into the women''s block There he noticed a woman with practically no clothes. He took her in his arms. Nine months later, he escaped again and returned to her room. Only this time she had a little moron.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man driving to the store finds no place to park... He sees an empty parking spot and eagerly drives his car into the slot, paying no attention to the "Customer Only" sign. When he comes back, his car has disappeared. He storms into the bank, where he demands to know where his car went. The banker looks straight into his eyes and whispers "I towed you so."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love the way the world rotates It really makes my day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife must have shit herself when i was born! Because she was only twelve days old', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Comanche scout was leading the US Army through the plains The army unit was traveling through hostile territory and needed this Comanche scout that knew the land better than anyone in the area, had the reputation to track anything for miles, and could tell what was headed towards them just from the signs of nature. The scout raised his right hand and halted the expedition suddenly. All eyes were on him as he walked quietly up ahead of the group and went to his knees and slowly placed his ear directly on the ground. He jumped back and turned towards the commander. "Buffalo come" said the Comanche scout in broken English. "By Lincoln''s ghost! How could you tell first there was something coming and second that it''s Buffalo?!" Said the amazed Commander. The Comanche scout raised his hand to his cheek and said "Face Sticky."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Aggies does it take to build a bonfire? It''s like dividing by zero. It can''t be done', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother found her son scooping ice cream in the kitchen and was mad. Mom : "Dinner is going to be ready in an hour, put that ice cream away and go play." Son : "But mom, there''s no one to play with." Mom : "I''ll play with you, what do you wanna play?" Son : "Lets play mommy and daddy, you go upstairs and lay down on the bed." The mom said ok and went upstairs. The son put on his dad''s fishing hat and lit up one of his dad''s cigarettes. He went upstairs and opened the door. Mom : "Now what do I do?" Son : "Get your ass out of bed, you whore, and fix that kid some fucking ice cream."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old couple is sitting in church The wife turns to the husband and says, "I just let out a silent fart. What should I do." "Put new batteries in your hearing aids."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*A man is trying to prove his innocence in court* Defendant: "Please your honour, I don''t have a single bad bone in my body" Prosecutor: "Well according to your medical exam it appears you have osteoporosis" Judge: "Guilty"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wakes up in hospital and exclaims, "Doctor! I... I can''t feel my legs"! Doctor: "Right, that''s because we had to amputate your arms".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar... He sits down to have a pint and notices lumps of meat hanging above the bar. He asks the barman, "What''s with the meat hanging here?" The barman explains... "Well if you can jump up and hit the meat, you get a free drink, but if you miss, you have to buy everyone a round. What do you say?" The man say, "Hmm no, the steaks are too high."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking home late at night along a dark street. There was a young woman walking a few steps in front of me. She crossed over to the other side of the road; I crossed over too. She quickened her pace a little; I quickened my pace too. She broke into a run; I broke into a run too. She panicked and began to scream and run hell-for-leather; I panicked and began to scream and run hell-for-leather too. Whatever it was, I was damned if it was going to catch me first. P.S. It''s an old one, but I doubt the original used semi-colons, so give me that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said that I don''t listen... ...or it was something like that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the console gamer die in the art gallary? There was too many frames.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So i was at this bar And the bar tender yelled "Does anyone know CPR!?" I yelled back "Yeah I do, and I know the rest of the alphabet too!" Everybody in the bar laughed....Except one guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy dies and goes to hell, Satan say''s he can choose his punishment, However there is one rule, once you pass on a pushiment, you cannot go back, you must move onto the next one, so the cowboy agree''s and satan takes him to the first room, it is a bunch of men standing on their heads, the cowboy takes a look and says "naw ill pass on this one". so they go to the next one, and its a bunch of people again standing on their heads however this time on hard concerete. once again the cowboy passes, in the third room, he sees a bunch of people standing knee deep in cow shit, smoking and drinking, the cowboy takes a look and says "well hell i lived most of my live smoking and drinking in cow shit, ill take this one. So the cowboy stands around for about a half hour smoking and drinking when satan walks back into the room and says "all right boys breaks over **EVERYBODY** back on your heads!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a black man why don''t I like cops? Beats me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the foreskin that accidentally walked into the Shul? [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish I got laid as much... ... as I get screwed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the General say to the Sultan when they lost the battle? "Sir, we''re Otto-men!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man saw a post on Facebook. The post said- hamburger + fries = 5 fries + slushie= 7 slushie + chicken nuggets = 11 How much does a slushie, chicken nuggets, fries and a hamburger cost? The man was incredibly stupid so he dawned on the question for hours and hours. While he was thinking, the answer just dawned on him. He scrolled down to the comment section and typed in one word. "Diabetes"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you have one of the rare $1million pennies in circulation? You don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this... ''Looking for man with these qualifications; won''t beat me up; or run away from me and is great in bed.'' She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at her door one day. The man she met said, "Hi, I''m Bob. I have no arms so I won''t beat you up and no legs so I won''t run away." So the lady says, "What makes you think you are great in bed?" Bob replies, "I rang the door bell didn''t I?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I started teaching Maths to midgets in my area. I''m making little things count.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three words to ruin a man''s ego...? Is it in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn''t wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn''t wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have just watched a documentary on marijuana. I think all documentaries should be watched this way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t noses be 12 unches long? Because then it''d be a foot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Was in town last night... I somehow managed to pull this absolute stunner of a lassie. Long story short, turns out she was a lady boy. But I mean, she looked like a woman, spoke like a woman, kissed like a woman... It was only when she drove us back to her place and managed to reverse the car perfectly into the garage that I stopped and thought "wait, hang on a minute!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend wanted me to treat her like a princess. So I gave her to a gorilla for him to throw barrels at me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar for every time someone over 40 told me my generation sucks... I''d have enough money to buy the rights for this joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man stuck in a traffic jam some guy came and knocked on his windows and said "Donald Trump has been kidnapped, the kidnappers ask for 1 billion dollars or they will burn him with gasoline , we''re asking for donation " So the man in the car asked and on average how much does a person donate? so the guy replies "between one gallon and two gallons "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s Albert Einstein, not mine Few things are Infinite, The Universe, Human stupidity and the amount of times you have to tell your Mother you can''t pause an online Game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a man with no balls and a small penis have in common with a joke with a good punchline... They both make you laugh and you don''t see them coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It takes many nails to build a crib... But only one to fill it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After Noah led the animals onto the ark, it started to rain After Noah led the animals onto the ark, two by two, it started to rain for 40 days and 40 nights. After the 15th day, with all the animals cooped up together with no designated toilet area, the ark began to smell. So Noah, being a wise old Noah, decided to set up a designated shitting area at the bow of the ark. He then called the animals in for a meeting. He proceeded to tell them about the newly designated shitting area. After the 20th day there was so much shit gathered at the bow that the ark began to tilt, leaving the stern raised making it near impossible to play pool. So, being a wise old Noah, he once again had a plan. With the help of the big animals such as the elephants and rhino''s he rolled up all the shit into one huge ball and threw it overboard into the ocean.... 325,000 years later Christopher Columbus discovered it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay couple in their 80? Slo-mo sexuals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Canada will take over the world. Then we''ll all be sorry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s most anticipated movie of the year? The Great Wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad has suggested that I register to be an organ donor.... I guess he is a man after my own heart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got arrested for killing a black man. They charged me with impersonating a police officer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Justin Timberlake''s Favorite vacation spot in the Ukraine? Crimea River', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Britain is the best place for foodies. You loose pounds everytime you eat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I sat next to a smoking-hot thai woman on an aeroplane once... I thought to myself.... *"please don''t get an erection, please don''t get an erection...."* And then she did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl, you''re just like breathing... All I ever think about', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I dont usually wear jeans but... i hate jeans with a passion but on this particular night that i had a date all my khakis were dirty, so i had no choice but to slip into a pair of levis i had hanging in the closet. later on that night the subject of hereditary body parts came up between me and the lady, she told me she gets her enormous tits from her mother, and i told her yeah well i have huge dick.... its in the JEANS.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do fish like to smoke? Seaweed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish are swimming Two fish are swimming, One hits a wall and says dam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My ex-girlfriend still loves it when I eat her out of house and home. Is this the usual breakup routine?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Trump''s favorite math operation? Division.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump single? Because he doesn''t want to be with some Juan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Talk is cheap. But AM radio still can''t turn a profit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw two kids fighting on the play ground. As the only adult there I had to step in. They never had a chance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Barrack say when he was all alone? [1/2 OC] Here I am Obama self... Like a crab in Michelle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the young casserole say to his mother when she called him down for dinner? "I can''t Ma, I''m stroganoff!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you a dime? Because no one fucking wants you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fashionable Russian? Spetsnazzy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nerdy pickup line Hey baby, are you a compressed file format, because rar. ^^^^^now ^^^^^where ^^^^^did ^^^^^I ^^^^^put ^^^^^the ^^^^^bleach...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three words I can''t stand *three words, I can''t stand', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend: Would you dump me for someone more like a trophy wife? Me: Honey, I already have someone like that! Girlfriend: Aww, you''re too sweet! Me: Yeah, you should meet her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a condom on an elephant? Take the ''Y'' out of ''easy'' and the ''F'' out of ''Way'' ....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a feminist makes herself a sandwich.. Is she oppressing herself? Bring it on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman is cleaning her daughters room when she stumbles upon her diary. She sees an entry that reads: "I lost my virginitty today" The woman starts crying. "How can this happen? I''ve given her everything. Why did she do this to me? She can''t be serious about this. She''s in 9th grade for gods sake. How does she not know how to spell virginity?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''Waiter,'' said the customer, ''there''s a hair in this honey.'' ''Ah'', replied the waiter, ''it must be from the comb.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever since I''ve installed Adblocker... for some reason all the local singles lost interest in me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever wonder why Jewish girls are so hot? its because the nazis put them in ovens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife came home pissed "I can''t believe what the school board is trying to do! I''ve worked hard to get ahead for 20 years now and they never cease to amaze me how petty they can be!" I asked what was the matter and did they not give her the promotion to run the school. "Yes, I got the promotion. The raise, the parking spot closest to the door. Even an extra week vacation." I''m thinking this sounds great. More money is always good. And an extra week off makes vacation planning so much easier. "So, it sounds like it''s everything you wanted. You''re now head of the school, something you''ve wanted for a long time." "It''s NOT everything. I don''t get the title I wanted. They couldn''t let me have it. They just had to twist the knife. My title is Senior Administrator." she hissed. "Well, that does seem a bit strange. But really, you know what you are. So what does it matter?" "It''s the Principal of the matter!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s it called when an entire store is sick? A staph (staff) infection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Z used to be at the front of the alphabet But as we all know, a threw z.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boss: Take this broom and go sweep the hallways! Employee: But I''m a college graduate! Boss: Great! Then I should only have to explain this just once.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know that the placebos is supposed to help with testing pills and medicines if they actually work... But who''s smart-ass idea was it to try it with Birth Control!?!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 years old: what do you call a cow that does not moo? 5 years old: it is called no moo cow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New Yorkers; don''t go on flight 225B tomorrow *sent from a Galaxy Note 7*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hello, is this the anonymous FBI tip line? "Yes, Dave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say that the best thing to do is something that excites you and scares you at the same time. Time to go fuck a blender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell, she''s holding a hand grenade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a skinny tree? The Real Slim Shady', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the NFL, NBA, and the Catholic Church have in common? They all have a cult following', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walked up to me and said... "I''m a teepee, I''m a wigwam, I''m a teepee, I''m a wigwam!" and I said "Relax man, you''re two tents!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After my wife gave birth I asked my doctor when we could have sex He told me as soon as he''d washed his hands', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You should be as excited about church as about the Superbowl. So when your pastor makes a point this Sunday, dump gatorade all over his head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t dinosaurs clap their hands? Because they are dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can never calculate the derivative of a curve. Every time I try, I go off on a tangent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dildo you can smoke weed out of? A bong dong.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Difference between Tiger Woods and Princess Diana Tiger Woods has a better driver', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has Donald Trump in common with Pink Floyd? The Wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two surfer dudes are sitting in church One turns to the other and says, "DUDE! Did you know God has a name?" "Dude, NO WAY!!!" "Yahweh!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was diagnosed with Postpartum Depression.. Being sad since I was born.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is brown and sticky? Shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only difference between my dick and a tiny action figure Is that my dick comes without any warning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a feeling Gordon Ramsay likes to wear condoms when he has sex Because he doesn''t like it raw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college teacher noticed that his exchange student, Dave, suddenly had started attracting a lot of female attention. So, one day he asked Dave about his secret. Dave replied: "Well, before sex I simply whip out my willy and smack it against the bedside table, like a hammer. It numbs it up and makes me last longer". Later that day, the college teacher gets home to his wife and finds her in the shower - a welcome opportunity for sex. So, he quickly undresses and starts banging his dick against the dresser, just before hearing his wife calling from the shower: "Is that you, Dave?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ellen should give away more stuff Then rename her show Ellen the Generous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald, Melania, and Ivanka are at the game They show up on the kiss cam, so Donald and Ivanka kiss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if your pour hot water down a rabbit hole? Hot-Cross bunnies! =', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife was writing a VD poem My wife was diligently writing something this morning. I asked her what she was writing? She relied that she was composing my Valentines Day poem. I was kinda chocked up then, she asked, "What rhymes with SCUM-BAG?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: Hey dad, tell me a joke! Dad: Pussy. Me: I don''t get it. Dad: I know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shakira Law What''s the difference between Trump and "Shakira Law?" Hips don''t lie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Princess do when she got to the ball? *Makes choking noise*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Deep within a forest, a little turtle began to climb a tree... After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground. The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate and chirped, Dear, I think its time to tell him hes adopted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the dumb cat slip and fall from the roof? Because = 0', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you think the unthinkable? With an ithburg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. When the bartender points it out, the pirate replies "Arrrgh, it''s been driving me nuts all day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guess who retweeted me? Your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom made chicken soup with rice in it... I told her, "I don''t want chicken soup with Ricin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend says he has the body of a Greek god... I had to explain to him that Buddha wasn''t Greek.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('OMG!! I used to be SOOOOOOO popular with the local ladies!!! THen I got ad-blocker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get kicked out of the Boy-scouts? Eating a brownie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Gates Went To A Restaurant And Paid A $2 Tip, The Waiter Remarked: "Your son gave $100, but you''re only giving $2?" Bill Gates: "He''s the son of a billionaire, I''m the son of a farmer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do they call a dildo in Ireland? A Shamcock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Poor old fool Poor Old fool, thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. So he invited the old man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought hed humor the old man and asked, So how many have you caught today? The old man replied, Youre the eighth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I named my new art Peach It looks pretty, but is completely useless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I became a proud dad today. My son is four, but he acted like a whiny bitch for the first three years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the play with all the frogs? It was ribbitting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Gun Company Was Created By Cats Mauser. I''m sorry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my friend why his bike was so fast He said it was made in Kenya I''m sorry I know this makes no sense whatsoever just click the downvote and be done with it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife told me to go and get some pills that help with an erection... You should''ve seen her face when I tossed her some diet pills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t get the question on the exam wrong... I just put down an alternative answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wrote several books about poltergeists. They''re flying off the shelves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What rhymes with orange. No it doesn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nobody believes that I can name the Canadian Prime Minister. It''s Trudeau.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend gave me his epi-pen as he was dying But I can''t get it to sign my name to save my life either', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s an engineer''s best form of birth control? His personality.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Taylor Swift and a stale Pepsi? The stale Pepsi won''t write a song about me after I dump it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Jewish Men are out for a stroll... 2 Jewish men - Abraham and Jacob - are out for a walk and notice a Catholic church with a sign "We pay $100 when you convert to Catholicism!" Abraham says: "I''m going to see what being Catholic is all about". He goes inside the church for 20 minutes, and when he returns, Jacob is waiting for him. "Have you converted?" asks Jacob "Yes, I am now Catholic" says Abraham "And did they pay you the $100?" Abraham replies "What is it with you people and your money?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alzheimer''s isn''t bad at all You get to meet new people every day! :D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I made a political joke up just now... Given the current temperature of the political climate.... Do you think we can all finally agree on climate change?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Michael Jackson''s favorite musical key? F minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar... for everyone who thought I was unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother just messaged me "I love my girlfriend <3". I always knew he liked them young, but that is fucking ridiculous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a chicken staring at a lettuce? Chicken Caesar salad!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do squirrels swim on their backs? To keep their nuts dry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve already got a car, but I want to have a DeLorean as well. I would drive my first car every day, but only drive the DeLorean from time to time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the deaf women getting run over by a train? Neither did she', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I noticed my waitress had a black eye So I ordered very slowly because obviously she doesn''t listen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad I had to take his bike away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The chance an American will be killed by a foreign-born refugee is 1 in 3.64 billion. Trump supporter : So you''re telling me there is still a chance!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my dentist if I can have some of his laughing gas. He said: "sure, knock yourself out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and has four wheels? A turd. I was just shitting you about the wheels.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am all for animal testing. As long as they are animal products. I don''t want my dogs raincoat to be fitted for a human.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We need to revolt against the... outlets. They have all the power!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Link from Legend of Zelda always die? Heart complications.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey girl, do you live in a corn field? Because I''m stalking you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Barbara Walters did a story on gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict... She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands. She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walked behind their husbands, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime and women seemed happy to maintain the old custom. Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, "Why do you still abide by an old custom, that you once tried so desperately to change?" The woman looked Ms. Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said, "Land mines."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my friends younger brother tells me... Him: Do you know what a gun that would shoot pubes sound like? Me: wtf pubes?... I don''t know... Him: Pew... Pew Pew Kids these days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My English teacher said that nothing rhymes with orange. There was a young man who had nothing, Until one day he happened upon an orange. That rhymes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Like My Women Like My fish Battered', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Mom made chicken soup with celery, chicken, carrots, and rice in it. I told her, "I don''t want soup with Ricin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so basic... ...she got a pH of 15.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dreamed I died in an orange sea Was just a FANTA sea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would like to be poor one day. Because being poor everyday it''s hard...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redditors are like pornstars... They''re better when they''re not old, but not too young.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Switzerland is a great country, with amazing views and nice people And their flag is also great, which is a huge plus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I will argue with you about anything. Anything at all. "No you won''t." "Yeah I will"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you pay a British saxophonist? A tenner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do hillbillies and yeast have in common? They''re both in bred', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest, a rabbi and a minister are on an airplane with an interfaith youth group The plane starts to go down, and they find there are only three parachutes. "We''ll take them and jump," says the minister. "But the children," cries the rabbi, "we have to save the children!" The minister snaps, "fuck the children!" The priest glances back at the terrified kids, thinks a moment, and asks, "Do we have time?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the bartender said... "We don''t serve time travellers". A time traveller walked into the bar. Saw this in a comment can''t find it now, thought I share here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican walked into a bar. He was renowned for being a bad drunk, but at the same time, he couldn''t help getting tipsy once in a while. He had five shots, and was already losing it. A woman came and sat beside him before he pushed her off the stool and stabbed her right in the chest because ''this senore is smelling of ginger''. He soon realised what he did, and walked out of the shop. Everybody else in the bar was too scared for their lives to call the police. When he got home, a little less drunk, his wife immediately asked him upon looking at his bloody shirt, ''Again, Jose? I thought we agreed on no more strong alcohols.'' ''I''m so sorry, Julia,'' he replied. ''I had tequila.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between China and Oceania? One spies on its citizens, uses torture, spreads false propaganda, and won''t stop fighting with its neighbors. The other is something Orwell put in a book', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A crossfitter, a vegan, and a trump supporter walk into a bar I only know because they told everyone who was there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We should switch to the hexadecimal number system already. And I have a good reasons why.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no teams named after a dog in the NFL? They would get beaten by Michael Vick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock jokes. Don''t upvote, I just need a good punchline quick. Please help.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Request] Meta-joke/anti-joke through explanation I understand this might be the wrong sub to ask this, but I figured /r/jokes would be able to help me. I''m looking for a specific type of joke or style of comedy that focuses on explaining the joke in a removed and almost satirical manner. The original joke doesn''t even have to be that funny, the focus is the emotionless explanation of it afterward (i.e. why it should be funny from a societal standpoint, how it uses different societal tropes, breaking it down from a psychological perspective, etc.). I feel like it is more common among students or professors commenting on the analytical nature of academia. If someone could point me in the right direction that would be much appreciated!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? **One** Germans are efficient & have no humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an honest capitalist? A small time robber', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel like a man trapped in a horse''s body. It sucks being a centaur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw two women in a passionate conversation. "How on earth did *he* get between *them*?" I overheard one of them say. I said, "I guess the ''t'' and ''m'' made room."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that the mascot of scientology is a horse? Because it''s a colt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waldo is being interviewed by the press at the Super Bowl. Waldo, how much did you pay for your ticket? Did you get a good seat? Where will you be sitting to watch the game? "I''m just here so I won''t get found."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children Fair enough, use an ashtray.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into Walmart She''s wearing very dirty clothes, smells bad and looks like she is in a horrible situation. She has 2 kids who look worse in her shopping cart The store clerk says: Wow, are they twins? Woman: No you idiot, they obviously look 2 years apart. Clerk: Oh, they don''t look alike. I just couldn''t believe you had sex twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moms pussy is so bushy It did 9/11', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend gave me his Epi-Pen while he was dying. I guess he just really wanted me to have it as a last wish...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get down from an elephant? ... You don''t. You get down from a goose!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a fly drops 5 inches A fly flies back and forth over a river repeatedly, dropping five inches each time. A fish sees it and decides it will jump and catch it when it drops. A bear sees the fish and decides it will get the fish when it jumps. A hunter with a cheese sandwich in his pocket sees the bear and waits for it to go for the fish to shoot it. A mouse sees the cheese sandwich and decides to wait for the hunter to shoot so that the sandwich will fall and he can get it. A cat sees the mouse and decides to wait for it to go for the sandwich to jump and catch it. So, the fly drops, the fish jumps, the bear goes for it, the hunter shoots, the sandwich falls, the mouse goes for it, and the cat jumps, but he misses and goes into the water. The moral of the story: when the fly drops five inches, the pussy gets wet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the mathematician say when she squared i? Shit just got real.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor used two fingers during my prostate exam... He said he needed a second opinion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar ... ... and tells the bartender, "*Quick! Give me a shot of whiskey before the trouble starts!*" The bartender pours the drink, patron downs it, looks around, and repeats, "*Quick! Give me another shot before the trouble starts!*". This goes on again and again for 9 more shots. Finally the bartender asks, "*When is the trouble going to start?*" The man says, "*When you find out I don''t have any money.*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sexually ambiguous child just handed me some money. It was a trans-action.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kim Jong Un is like a Penis shaped potato. He''s a little Dick-Tater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Isis bumper sticker I''d rather be heading.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d love to watch 48 Hours But it would be Monday by the time it''s finished and ain''t nobody got time for that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do apes call sunbathing? Orangutanning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went for a job interview today... "Describe yourself in one word." "Indecisive, maybe. I''m not sure."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I have Alzheimer''s, Hey I just met you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got into a car accident just now. My wife and children are dead and I''m not doing too well myself. Luckily, it only hurts when I laugh. HahaHahaahahahaha. Hahahahahaha. Hahahahahahaha.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mother: Son, your teacher told me you''ve been swearing in school Boy: Mom, do you believe everything that fucking bitch says?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton is starting her own Television show. It was going to be called The Biggest Loser but that was taken so she is going with The Biggest Liar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was in college, my roommates would have sex with anything that moved. I never felt the need to limit myself that much.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called what a man goes down on a woman in a bar? A pub.lic display of affection', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a deer with no eyes? No ideer What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no ideer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you become a millionaire with horses? You start as a billionaire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, "get off me you two!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the guy who made an outfit out of super glue? It was hard to pull off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep an idiot worried for a day? I''ll tell you first thing tomorrow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a carabao who can climb a tree? Awesome!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is my step ladder. I never knew my real ladder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Death and My Dad I want to die peacefully and in my sleep like my father did, not screaming in terror like his passengers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to die peacefully in sleep, just like my father. Not screaming in horror like passengers in his bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump Worst joke I ever told.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother was in a car crash but luckily she was okay... WAS okay, she''s dead now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you find Ronald McDonald at a nude beach? He''s got sesame seed buns', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had his credit card stolen... However, he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t you hate it when you think of something funny to post and... you forget to reddit down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a rain of strategy games? A Tropico storm', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my girlfriend if we could have sex tonight. She said she wants to remain a virgin until her wedding night...butt fuck it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People take so much for granted. Like punchlines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Do Lesbians Like Cats So Much? Because a dog is a man''s best friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many planets are there? Guy: How many planets are there? Girl: 8 Guy: Wrong, 7 after I destroy uranus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the clock do after night left him? He was in mourning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Violence is the only option. Unless a mosquito lands on your dick, then it''s a hostage situation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a good carpenter and a 20 years old girl have in common? No wood gets wasted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I write my mistresses'' phone numbers on the rear view mirror. I know my wife would never think to look there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Ex Girlfriend was getting beaten up at a bus stop by 5 guys, so as a human being I had to step in and help.... She didn''t stand a chance against the 6 of us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do the newly rich like to buy Rolex watches? To know when it is time for a new wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar... For every time I disappointed my family, I would have enough to make them proud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People here take so much for granted. If you took away someone''s car, house and clothes, They''d have nothing. But if you did the same to someone from one of the poorest countries, they''d probably still have aids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. President, two brazillian soldiers died in our military strike in Yemen. "Oh my god... Do we have to file for bankruptcy already?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I let a pasta chef borrow my car He returned it all denty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are blonde jokes so short? So men can remember them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best thing about dating a feminist? When you go out for dinner you only have to pay for your half!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus may have been offended Elderly couple in church during Easter mass. Wife turns to husband and says, "I have just done a silent fart, what should I do?" Husband says, "put new batteries in your hearing aid!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anal with my girlfriend makes my whole day But it makes her hole weak', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time Machine **What do we want?** *Time machine!* **When do we want it?** *Doesn''t matter!*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m working on my second Billion dollars. My first billion didn''t work out so I''ve moved on to my second.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I attempted suicide today Won''t ever do that again, I almost killed myself', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many contractors does it take to screw in a light blub? None, it''s a union job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Young Blond Suspects A Affair A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, ''''Shut up...you''re next!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar for every time someone over 40 told me my generation sucks... Then I could afford a house in the economy they ruined.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Obama was from Hawaii Kenya believe it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took my Indian friend to a Persian restaurant He said the pita was second to naan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I come off confident and cocky cause i call my dick life. But really its cause life is short.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('By accident, I wore my son''s shirt to work today. It was a bit tight under the arms. Guess I should have taken his arms out of it before I put it on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the deaf man get his hearing back? His wife slapped a fifth sense into him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of bee gives you immortality? A Zom-bee!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Muslim entering America? Same as every other person, a tourist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a bartender says, "We don''t serve time travelers in here!" A time traveler walks into a bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An eagerly-awaited cook book "Cooking with Herbs" finally released! It''s about thyme.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s it called when you mix champagne with orange juice at breakfast? Alcoholism', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you see the new "American Tail" movie with Donald Trump in it? Fievel goes back to Russia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a scale of 0 to 1, I think I''m two funny!... Well maybe, on a scale of 0 to 1, I''m nought funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police: Where do u live? Police: Where do u live? Me: With my parents. Police: Where do your parents live? Me: With Me. Police: Where do you all live? Me: Together. Police: Where is your house? Me: Next to my neighbors house. Police: Where is your neighbors house? Me: You won''t believe me if I tell you. Police: Tell Me! Me: Next to my house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fell asleep at a house party last night and someone put a teabag in my mouth, I went fucking mental... No one treats me like a mug', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Beyonce is having twins... !RemindMe 18 years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A jew, christian, and muslim all walk into a bar... the muslim explodes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, ''''Shut up...you''re next!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rory Schlein, the Australian speedway racer, was seriously hurt while driving into a closed gate at a racetrack. Right before he hit the gate, he and his crew chief were tossing terrible jokes back and forth over the radio. Rory was talking about people lining up haphazardly to get hit in the face when his crew chief yelled, "That''s not open Schlein!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump''s toupee and a thong have in common They both barely cover an asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 17999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my drug dealer sold me a pair of shoes. I don''t know what he laced them with, but I''m tripping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a balloon store. The storekeeper asks, "What can I get for you today?" The man says, "I''m looking for some Patriots themed balloons for my Super Bowl party." The storekeeper looks at him for a second, then says, "Sorry, those are all deflated."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An F5 tornado went through Arkansas last week... It did $150 million worth of improvements.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say sex doesn''t count until you''re two inches in So I''ll be a virgin forever', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Genetic engineering now allows parents to select the eye color of their children. More great work from the University of Josef Mengele.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had an idea for a movie plot. A retired CIA agent searches for his kidnapped daughter in Paris, but it turns out that idea was taken. I had another idea for one where the same agent is kidnapped with his wife in Istanbul, but it turns out that one was taken too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('USSR- United States Snowflakes & Retards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you create a hipster? Give a homeless guy an iPhone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: If you have 52 watermelons in one hand, and 43 apples in the other, you give 7 fruits to your friend, what do you have? Student: A friend', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer ...than the men who mention it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate goes to a doctor... A pirate goes to a doctor, worried that the moles on his back might be cancerous. The doctor inspects them. "It''s ok," he says. "They''re benign." The pirate replies "Check ''em again matey, I think there be at least ten!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 President to Heaven George Bush , Barack Obama & Donald Trump are going for a job interview with God God asks Bush " " What do you believe in ? " Bush answers ga '' '' I believe in the free market , fighting evil at the battle front & the strong American nation ! " God is impressed by Bush & tells him ( " Great , come sit on the chair on my right " Next , God asks Obama , " What do you believe in ? " Obama answers 4 ) " I believe in the power of democracy , helping the poor , world peace , and promoting that men of all colors are no different " God is really impressed by Obama & tells him " Well done , come sit on the chair on my left . Finally , God asks Trump . " What do you believe in ? " .. Trump answers " I believe you ''re sitting on my chair . "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cannibals are eating Carlos Mencia. One of them turns to the other and says, "Hey, didn''t we see this joke yesterday?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife treats me like God, she ignores me until she wants something', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a Trump supporter fit 50,000 books in their living room? In the fireplace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know that Jesus was black Because he was carpenter yet you never heard about him building anything', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do so many blues musicians come from Korea? Theres a lot of Seoul', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the oceans say to eachother? Nothing, they just waved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sits down next to a lady reading a newspaper by the window on a bus... He can''t help himself and has to fart so he does his best to sneak it out. He glances over and she doesn''t seem to notice. Relieved, he decides to attempt light conversation. "Are you done with that newspaper?" he asked. She replied "No, but next tree we pass, I''ll grab you some leaves".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a chemistry teacher pick up girls? "Hey baby, wanna head back to my place and form a covalent bond?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Freudians does it take to change a light bulb? Two One to screw in the lightbulb and 1 to hold the Cock Edit: Father Edit2: Ladder', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between and out law and an in law? Outlaws are wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t t-rex clap their hands? Because they''re all dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An introvert walks into a bar... Then immediately walks out because fuck that shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hooters Hooters is known for two things......boobs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear was taking a dump in the forest when a rabbit hopped by... The bear asked the rabbit, "Does poop stick to your fur?" The rabbit said, "Yes, but it washes out easily enough." So the bear picked him up and wiped his butt with him. Then the rabbit fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey buddy do you want to see the game this Sunday? *Puts on 1997 movie "The Game" by David Fincher*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is waiting for a bus, when he sees a blonde across the street digging a hole... ...and another blonde immediately filling the hole back in with dirt. He watches as they move up the street doing this over and over again. The first blonde digs a hole, and the second one fills the dirt right back in. After a few minutes, he decides to ask them "excuse me, what are you ladies doing?" "We''re working" the first blonde replies. "Just the two of you?" He inquires. "Well" the second blonde chimes in, "there''s usually three of us, but the girl that plants the trees called out sick"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old women on a plane and sitting next to each other Two old women on a plane sitting next to each other one black the other white. Black:What would you do if the plane were to fall out of the sky and crash? White:I would put on my best clothes and all my most expensive looking jewelery Black: what! why? White: because they rescue the rich white women first. What about you? Black: Id strip down naked White: What! why? Black: because they rescue the black box first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When in doubt ... Wife : I doubt my husband has been cheating on me.... I have doubt on one woman we both know.... What to do? Shrink: Take your husband to that woman''s doorstep and see if his wi-fi connects automatically.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bowling Green Massacre jokes are in bad taste Show some respect for the victims!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apple has now turned to medical accessories!! their first product is the Ipatch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Donald Trump and a baby polar bear? It will be a year before the baby polar bear kills its first seal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is walking around the White House lawn after the first snowfall as president... On the south lawn he sees that someone has written "Trump Sucks!" in pee in the snow. Thin-skinned as he is, he''s furious and calls a staff meeting to investigate who did it. After two days, his investigation team tells him that they have good news and bad news. The good news was that they found the culprit and it was Obama. The bad news was that it was in Melania''s handwriting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a girlfriend but.... "But what?" "She''s in another nation" "Which one?" "Imagination"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? Your mom can''t take a joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of pants does a scientist wear? A pair of genes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you wear ''Y'' fronts in Russia? Because Chernobyl fall out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Hold your nuts this is no ordinary blowjob!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yes, Ive lost to my computer at chess... But it turned out to be no match for me at kickboxing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people never eat clocks? Because its really time consuming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son got hold of my autobiography and threw the pages all around the house. I really need to sort my life out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Short gun story A man walked into a crowded bar waving his unholstered pistol and yelled, "I have a colt 45 model 1911 with a seven round magazine plus one in the chamber and I want to know who is sleeping with my wife!" A voice yelled from the back of the bar, "You''re gonna need more ammo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I ever go missing, you should put my picture on beer rather than milk bottles... This way, my friends will find me faster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Trumps America he''s not Aladdin He''s Aladout', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Job interview in a psychiatry... So youre interested in working with us. What is your experience with mentally disturbed people? Ive been on Facebook for 5 years now. Very good, the job is yours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What perches on your computer and says "Pieces of seven, pieces of seven"? A parity error', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friends asked me to impersonate a lion. It was a roaring success.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve spilt paint. It''s a dyer situation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A software engineer walks into a bar. He sits down and sees the bartender yelling at the computer when trying to process a customer''s order. "Why are you yelling at the computer?" the engineer asks. "Nothing is working! The software on the computer is riddled with bugs!" responds the bartender. The engineer takes a look at the computer and notices the software it is running was actually written by himself a few years earlier. Immediately, he gets offended. "Those aren''t bugs!" the engineer yelled. "Those are alternative features!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever pissed in the shower? "Have you ever pissed in the shower?" my girlfriend asked, a little embarrassed I said "I don''t like to admit it but yes.. I have," "That''s Fucking disgusting!!" she exclaimed "well these things happen when you''re talking a shit!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The neighbours kept me up last night because they were having sex into the early hours of the morning. I would have asked my wife to knock on their door, but she was out playing tennis with her friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was gunna write the great American nursing home romance novel... ....but the title "50 Shades of Grey" was already taken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? Ones a Goodyear. The others a great year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Porn is so unrealistic Just took a shower with my girlfriend..... And stood in the corner freezing for 20 minutes handing her different shampoos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between anal and oral sex? Oral sex makes your day. Anal makes your hole weak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb? Six. One Slytherin to break it. One Gryffindor to volunteer to change it. Three Hufflepuffs to hold the ladder to ensure the safety of the Gryffindor student. And one Ravenclaw to point out that they could have just used magic in the first place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks in on her boyfriend cheating on her She pulls out a gun and says: I''m done with you! Boyfriend: Calm down, calm down. We can settle this with words. The blonde puts the gun to her head Boyfriend: What do you think you''re doing? Blonde: Don''t worry, you''re next.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton is getting her own video game. Left 4 Dead: Benghazi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do vegetarians give good head? Because theyre used to eating nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My roommate claims I''m schizophrenic. We''ll show him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many millennials does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it''s already lit, fam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does the National Football League deserve Tax-Exempt Status even though it generated at least $9 billion in revenue last season? Because it is just as real as the other religions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The most attractive part of Amy Schumer is.... Her Gravitational pull.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re a guy applying for a porn agency... Do you send headshots or headshots?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I painted my computer black to make it run faster... but it just stopped working', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When i was 5 i thought the rain was god peeing How silly childish ideas can be...thinking god exists', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a bass player pick up girls? He says "Hi I''m a guitarist"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jose Cuervo is about to come out with a new Diet Tequila.... After the 2nd shot, every girl in the bar will look like they''ve lost 20 lbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Six afraid of Seven Because Seven was a registered Six offender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do one thing everyday that scares you. -Eleanor Roosevelt Today, I will fuck a cactus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Throwing acid is wrong.. .. in some people''s eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? They just beat the room for being black.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long do I have to live? "I am afraid you have a terminal illness, you only have 10 to live," said the doctor. "10 what, days, weeks, months?" "Nine"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would happen if Hungary invaded and conquered Turkey? A new kingdom would be formed known as full.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to be a millionaire just like my dad!! Wow, your dads a millionaire? No, but he always wanted to be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('two mice chewing on a filmrole..one of them goes.." i think the book was better".. two mice chewing on a filmrole..one of them goes.." i think the book was better"..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t get WiFi on my phone Did Tech Support for an ISP Customer: "I can''t get WiFi on my phone" TS : does routine checks, remote login to router, etc.... TS : "All looks OK here. Can''t see your phone connected to the router though I can see a computer and a TV box connected on Wi-Fi. Any errors on the phone?" Customer: "It looks OK. It worked fine yesterday" TS : does a bit more digging - can''t see a problem TS : "can you move closer to the router?" Customer: "I''m in Spain on holidays - the router is back home, would that make a difference?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beyonce has more black people inside her than. Donald trumps cabinet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('they say we learn from our mistakes thats why i am making as many as possible soon i will be a genius.. they say we learn from our mistakes thats why i am making as many as possible soon i will be a genius..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a good joke and a bad joke timing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to start a business selling premium dildos, but I think I can''t compete with Apple selling overpriced stuff for assholes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid... ... She didn''t realize this was a repost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a joke about sodium? Na', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife : I''m leaving you! Wife : I''m leaving you Me : Why?! Wife : You lie to me constantly! Me : Ha! You don''t just leave the man who invented the spatula, Amber!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should you do if your xbox 360 gets the red ring of death? Buy a PS3', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Bartender and the boy A man entered the bar to enjoy a drink when suddenly he saw a small boy enters the bar. The bartender said to the man. "hey, watch this" The man watches as the boy approaches the bartender and the bartender showed something on each hand. On his left was a 1$ bill while the other hand shows a 10$ bill. The boy grabs the 1$ bill and left the bar. The bartender chuckled and says. "you see this kid? This kid never learns! Hes been doing the same thing for three months! What a dumb kid" The man soon finishes his drink, paid and left the bar. Outside the bar he saw the same kid buying an ice cream. He decided to approach and ask the little boy. "hey kid, why did you take the 1$ bill instead of the 10$?" The boy just looks at him and say. "mister, if i take the 10$ bill he wouldnt give me anymore money!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do the T-Rex often have trouble high-fiving? Because they''re dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my wife what we were having for dinner tonight She said, "well firstly,. Going to boil some potatoes. Then I''m going to cook the chicken in the oven." "Delicious", I said, "what else?". "Then I''m going to roast some vegetables and pour us a nice glass of red wine." Slightly confused, I asked, "That sounds lovely darling. One thing though..." "...I didn''t realise you enjoyed doing that kind of thing?" "What kind of thing dear?" "Well, it seems a bit wrong, for our dinner entertainment, to take the piss out of disabled people..." Badumshhhh Sorry, I know that sucked ball bags, I just thought of it and tried to make a joke out of it. Gotta try huh?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college professor asks all of his students to yell out stereotypes for a class project For a class project, a college professor asks all of his students to brainstorm and yell out different kinds of stereotypes. "All blonde girls are dumb!" yells a boy in the back. "Sony!" Yells the blonde girl in the front.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After my girlfriend got pregnant, After my girlfriend got pregnant, everything changed. My address, my job, my phone number...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new harbour master... A new harbour master decided to send a toll man to a Russian ship and he told him "Be sure to be thorough they usually hide a lot of vodka" Amazingly the toll man didn''t find anything. But 5 days later the ship still hadn''t moved so he called the captain to see what the problem was. "Well your toll man looked everywhere so we had to throw the vodka out the windows and now we are stuck on a mountain of glass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What language does furniture speak? Forniture Polish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Past, Present and Future all walk into the bar at the same time... ... it was **tense**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was standing on a roof of a Hotel and threatened to Jump! I Yelled "Do A Flip" I am now Fired from the Suicide Watch...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the terrorists from Hoth? They call themselves Ice-IS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('bathroom joke How long a minutes is, depends on which side of the bathroom door you''re on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the hay upset? Because the straw was about to bale', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is the 21st century. Where deleting history is more important than creating history.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my dad yesterday if he knew how to ruin a good joke.... He fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At work tonight a woman stopped me and asked "Bathroom?" I replied, "No, my name is Chase, but you can piss on my face if you''d like."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never ask the Secretary of State for directions. All he''ll tell you to do is trun right and trun left. ( a \ a)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad was trembling when I told him my brother and I had gotten jobs as valets. I guess he really didn''t like the idea of having parking sons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Woody Joke What wood happen if you had a Wooden Car With Wooden Seats Wooden Tires And A Wooden Engine? It Wooden''t Start', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bowlegged doe comes walking out of the woods... And says thats the last time I do that for ten bucks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you have when you have two little green balls in the palm of your hand?? Kermits undivided attention!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the diffrence between a hormone and an enzym? I can make an enzym, but I can''t make a hormone', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not sure who this "OP" person is, but it seems like every guy on reddit has slept with his mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the man with no arms and no legs? The doctor said he would be arsing around for the rest of his life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('the husband said to his wife... husband honey call the plumber the toilet is stopped up again wife wtf! how did it happen again? husband how do you think it happened wife well I am not calling him you do it husband no you call him wife no husband call the fucking plumber wife fine when the husband came home from work his wife was fucking the plumber well that''s what he asked her to do', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst possible slogan for someone running for president in Germany? Make Germany great again', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, what made you fall ill in Hawaii? "Poi, son."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Measuring device. The device used to measure people''s gullibility is called a Gullibilometer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I spent last night defrosting the fridge Or "foreplay" as she used to call it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Canadians listen to when they go clubbing? Seal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a question on my math test that asked whether the slope of a line was positive or negative... I said yes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamas so fat It takes her 2 trips to haul ass!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('/r/Jokes is like America. Nothing Pro-Trump will get a popular vote.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m here to kiss ass and chew bubblegum. And I''m all out- wait, shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you experience when you meditate inside a Turkish prison? The deep state.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of swimsuit do you wear to the zoo? Zuchini', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s so easy to understand people who work at the US mint They make a lot of cents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I felt a little behind in Middle School It was a major bummer when the cops found out :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Freshman Seminar Professor Was Trying To Wow His Students He told them, "In the English Language, a double negative equals a positive. For example, I didn''t not do it equals I did it. But no double positive in English equals a negative." A student in the back shouted, "YEAH, RIGHT!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say I don''t have friends. They''re wrong. I have 10 seasons on DVD.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a car do when a ram is running towards it? Dodge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Arnold Schwarzenegger kill insects? Because he''s an ex-terminator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend just said this... "I know I''ve reached my ultimate form when all I do is hit dabs in my bathroom and watch Naruto."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mooncakes put the fat Into gong hei fat choy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in 2013, Beyonc did an amazing ''Lights Out'' performance. So did the stadium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is breakfast a prisoners favorite meal? Because he is a cereal killer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everything is so political nowadays I turned on nickelodeon to see Bob the builder building a wall so Dora couldn''t explore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t need both, but I want both That''s what he said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What the difference between carbon and my ex? She could form more than 4 bonds at the same time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A female chicken wearing a tie is known to do some weird shit with tentacles. Hentai.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People keep telling me I don''t have friends. That''s not true, I have all 10 seasons on DVD.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Donald Trump has sex, his female partner is always on top. Because he can only fuck up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the dwarf reach the cookies on top of the fridge? He Imp-provised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Buddhist walks into an ice cream shop and says make me one with everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dishwasher stopped working today Ironically, my dishwasher got the dishwasher in the divorce', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump doesn''t compare to universeal healthcare Bernie gets a call from Trump asking for advice. "...Ands that''s why I placed the ban, in order to hide my need hand growth serum." "Even with that serum, your hands are smaller than the medical bill of the average American with my universal healthcare plan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was gonna make an anal joke ..Butt fuck it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muslims say islam is the religion of peace Everyone else says they forgot the S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Utz and Disney are teaming up to make a new snack food. They''re called "Dis-Nutz".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer called his station back on Radio. He was at a murder scene where an old woman shot her husband for stepping on just mopped floor. Dispatch: So was an Arrest made ? Officer: Not yet. Dispatch: ? Officer: The floor is still wet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time does Sean Connery like to play racquet sports? Ten-ish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She''s a beautiful girl, inside and out... I know, because I''ve been inside her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most popular kind of music in the Czech Republic? Prague Rock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A deaf man to a man on street : are you deaf? Man on the street : no, I''m deaf! First man: oh! I thought you are deaf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Native American guy claimed I was insensitive to his culture, saying I''ve never walked a mile in their shoes. I asked What are you going to do? Sioux me?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Caught My wife walked in on me having sex with our daughter. I don''t know what she was more upset about. The fact that I was having sex with our daughter or that the abortion clinic let me keep her...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Trump''s favorite molecular bond? Van der Waals', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friend told me that I was already the Michael Jordan of my sport I play baseball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two southern belles are standing outside on a sunny day Elizabeth: "My husband got me this beautiful diamond ring yesterday, isn''t it just precious?" Evelyn: "How nice for you!" Elizabeth: "and this beautiful ranch was left to me by my daddy. Isn''t it just wonderful?" Evelyn: "How nice for you!" Elizabeth: "And my dear sweet brothers bought me those absolutely majestic horses you see off in the distance." Evelyn:"Well, how nice for you!". Elizabeth: "Evelyn you''re a beautiful, young woman. Surely the men in your life must take good care of you!" Evelyn: "Oh they do! My daddy really valued a good education and he sent me to boarding school. They taught literature, arithmetic, history, and how to speak in polite society. That''s where they taught me to say ''how nice for you'' instead of ''I don''t give a fuck''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s Halloween Little Johnny was on a park bench stuffing all of his Halloween candy in his mouth. An old lady came over and said. "Son, don''t you know that eating all of that candy will rot your teeth, give you acne, and make you sick?" "My grandfather lived to be 105 years old!" replied Johnny. "Did he eat five candy bars at a sitting?" the old lady retorted. "No," said Johnny, "but he minded his own freakin'' business."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters go out hunting in a forest They shoot a deer and begin dragging him back. However, they were dragging it by the tail and the antlers kept getting caught in the bushes and trees. Eventually, they pass by another hunter who advises them that they should hold the deer by the antlers so it doesn''t get caught. They decide to heed his advice and carry the deer by its antlers. Soon after a while, one hunter says to the other: "You know, that guy was right. This is a lot easier." The other hunter says "Yeah but I think we''ve been walking in the wrong direction"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris walks into a bar Edit: a bar walks into Chuck Norris', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wakes up one morning to find that he''s grown a thick beard and is wearing a turban.... He, being very concerned and disoriented, calls his boss in order to see if he can get the day off. Man: "Boss, I just woke up with a turban and a long, thick beard. I think I need a day to figure things out." Boss: " So what are you saying....?" Man: "I''m calling in Sikh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t blondes get sick very often? Viruses and bacteria also have their pride!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is being chased trough a city by two government agents. He sprints through the market, knocking over stands and booths. Then he turns down an alley way. His prosecutors were only mere feet away from him. They break from out of the alley way and run towards the docks. The man looks out and sees a ferry a good distance away from the edge. He runs down the pier, still being closely followed. With all his might, he leaps from the dock to the boat. He was hardly able to grab on, but he managed. The agents men stood at the end of the dock, smiling. The man stood up and it dawned on him; the ferry was coming in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does The Fonz like to eat? Chic-Fil-Ayyy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a Charlie Chaplin look alike contest, the guy who won was some German chap, the judges gave him perfect neins', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the funniest thing to ever come out of Sarah Silverman''s mouth? **A:** Jimmy Kimmel''s dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the kid swinging? Peer pressure. His friends started to do drugs last month.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Northern Iraqi with a yeast infection? A cheese Kurd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife asked me... "Why do you always rest your hands on top of my head when I go down on you?" I told her- "Because if I didn''t, I''d probably end up applauding."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I painted my laptop black... I painted my laptop black in the hopes that it would run faster... Now it doesn''t work. :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was feeling crumby. jokie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a pregnancy and alcoholism have in common? They can both be ended with a twelve step program', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what really blew people''s minds in the ''90s? Kurt Cobain''s suicide. Blew his too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom found out I am gay and that she doesn''t want me going down a dark road So I told her I was going to start dating black guys from now on. (Actual true story)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re a polyglot, you speak 4+ languages, if you''re trilingual you speak three languages, and if you''re bilingual you speak two languages. What are you if you speak one language? American', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is eco-friendly He''ll build his wall out of the (99%) recycled material on /r/Jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to know if your girlfriend is a slut on your first night. Requirements : a blue paint, a red paint and a hammer. Steps : 1. Paint one of your balls blue and the other one red. 2. Proceed towards your first coitus experience. 3. If you find your girlfriend saying "That''s the strangest pair of balls I have ever seen", hit her on the head with a hammer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who has had no friends for 5 years? A Sandy Hook survivor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer one turns to the other and says "does this person taste funny to you?", the other responds "I though this was pork!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are married women heavier than single women? A wedding ring has mass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you read the book "The Yellow River"? It''s the greatest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Jesus play rugby? He won''t support the hooker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever wondered why they have a women''s studies major in colleges but no men''s studies major? Well actually they do, it''s called World History.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 logicians walk into a bar the bartender asks "is everyone having a beer?" the first logician says "I dont know" the second logician says "I dont know" the third logician says "yes"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump passes a travel ban for all his supporters. They are not allowed to leave the county.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What event will Mexico win in the next summer Olympics? Hurdles, high jump and pole vault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Asked my dad what LGBT stands for He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What''s the ''g'' for?" Obviously I had to reply with "Garnish". [True story. My dad is not an idiot either, totally normal human.]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people dress up for their flights? Ain''t no one got time to dress you before your burial if the plane is falling. **If hell exists, I just bought 1st front row business class ticket there**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rockets? Maybe. But the Chinese haven''t contributed to aviation. After all, two Wongs don''t make a Wright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Al Gore had his own drumming software company he should name it... AlGoreRythyms', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I go out with a girl I always look in her eyes If she is not blind, I already know that I have no chance with her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the robbery at the bakery? The guy ab*scone*ded after the crime. I''ll see myself out...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have discovered a new gay dinasaour... The Megasoreass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend was reading an anti-gravity book... He couldn''t put it down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Jeffrey Dahmer have a blender on his front porch? So when he gets visitors, he can greet them with a hand shake!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I watched a porno movie last night... It was pretty good but the plot had a lot of holes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hit the gym today. Broke my hand on the entrance doors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a mountain sized bird made of? Well, part cliff, partridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can predict the punchline If you''re a fortune teller...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by gatecrashing an amputee conference... It was just a bit of ''armless fun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ive never been married, but I can imagine how it feels... I once had a stone stuck in my shoe for 10 hours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dunno why people like to associate Comcast with the Nazis It''s not like they''re the fascist out there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Swim Race A local pool was holding a swim meet for the disabled. There were three contestants, one man had no arms, one man had no legs, and one man was just a disembodied head. The contestants got up on their blocks and prepared for the race. The starting pistol fired and the three men dove into the water. the man with no arms took the early lead, the man with no legs was gaining ground, and the head sunk straight to the bottom as a trail of bubbles floated to the surface. The race ended and the man with no legs swam down to save the head. He placed the head on the deck and after a couple of coughs the head turned to the staff and shouted "You Motherfucker, three fucking years I''ve been learning to swim with my fucking ears and two minutes before the start you put a goddamn swim cap on me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You remind me of a door Because you''re a-door-able :}', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried coming up with a joke about mean people. But they were all just average', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Enough about my weight!!! Ive had it with your silly remarks about my weight. Im leaving you! But honey, what about our child? What child?! Oh, so youre not pregnant?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mommy, why are all the cars beeping their horns? Son: Mommy, why are all the cars beeping their horns? Mother: Because theres a wedding going on. Son: But isnt the horn a warning signal, Mommy? Mother: Exactly, son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I call my ex-girlfriend Titanic Jack Because she''s as cold as ice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what did the pencil sharpener say to the broken pencil.. that he should stop acting so littlepointed..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s like Wal-Mart. Errybody''s been to her grand opening!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never understood why everyone hates mean people. I just think their average.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when you commit suicide on Hanukkah A Jewicide', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s New Book I was walking in the mall and I saw that there was an Arabic bookstore. The sign outside led me to wonder just what exactly was in a Muslim bookstore, so I went in. As I was wandering around taking a look, the clerk gave me the stink eye, but asked if he could help me. I know I didn''t look like his normal clientele, so I asked, Do you have a copy of Donald Trump''s Book on his U.S. Immigration policy regarding Muslims and Illegal aliens? The clerk said, Kiss my ass, Get out, and Stay Out! I said, Yes, that''s the one. Do you have it in paperback?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old woman lies dead on the side of the road... and she has semen in her eyes. The policeman looked at her and said ''Looks like she saw her killer coming.'' (Not sure if this one was posted before, I saw it on another site and couldn''t see it here)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ballons ballons are like souls,they wanna go up but they can''t and when you pop them,they scream...sorry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman tells her friend she is getting married for the fourth time. "How wonderful! I hope you don''t mind me asking, what happened to your first husband?" "He ate poisonous mushrooms and died." "Oh, how tragic! What about your second husband?" "He also ate poisonous mushrooms and died." "Oh, how terrible! I''m almost afraid to ask you about your third husband." "He died of a broken neck." "A broken neck?" "He wouldn''t eat the mushrooms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that if you spell... Window backwards is window. It''s not, but for a second you believed me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once tried greeting everyone I met by saying "titanic"... Turns out it wasn''t a very good ice breaker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rape is not funny Unless you are raping a clown', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My life completely changed after I learned Morse Code. To me, "life" just became a series of dots and dashes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Jamaican say after winning the barefoot marathon? "Da trill of victory always betta dan de agony of de feet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not that hard to tell an alligator and a crocodile apart.. One will see you later and the other will see you in a while', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fire is hot And ISIS cold', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you eat when you go hiking? Trail mix', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does an Arab guy say when he''s happy? - Yemen! What does an Arab guy say when something upsets him? - Oman...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I remember tears in my eyes when dad chopped onions. Onions was a great dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone asked me to validate their parking So I said, "You did a very good job. I am very proud of you." ^^I''m ^^sorry. ^^I ^^actually ^^said ^^that ^^to ^^someone ^^at ^^work ^^today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I went to my meeting of the Premature Ejaculation group Turns out it is tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bird that punches people? Steven Seagull', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to an international "Flat Earther" convention the other day Turns out they have members all around the world', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend Gary doesn''t know why Richard isn''t interested in his donkey... He really wants to get Dick into his ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than ants in your pants? Uncles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are people so outraged and grossed out by incest? I think they should get some perspective. There are much worse things happening in the world and, really, it''s all relative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bartender walks into a stable The horse says "Why the wrong place?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife asked me, "Why don''t you ever come to yoga class with me??"... "That''s kind of a stretch for me"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I understand why bakers are addicted to baking bread. Sometimes they just knead it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve got Yellow Fever.. Don''t hit on me just because I''m Asian', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife bought a new dress and asked me if it made her look fat I said, "Of course not, honey. It''s not the dress. It''s your lack of discipline and self-control."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally ate some food coloring the other day... The doctor said that I''m fine, but I still feel like a little bit of me dyed that day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket? How far do you think I can kick this bucket?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife treats her husband by taking him to a strip club for his birthday. At the club, the doorman says, "Hi Jim, how are you?" The wife asks, "How does he know you?" Jim says, "Oh dear, I play football with him." Inside the Bartender Says, "The Usual, Jim?" Jim says to Wife, "Before you say anything, He''s on the Darts team." Next a stripper Says, "Hi Jim! Do you crave the special again?" The Wife storms out dragging Jim with her & jumps into a taxi. The Taxi driver Says, "Hey Jimmy boy! You picked up an ugly one this time..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL how not to install a fence Ooops... wrong place for this post', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a feminists favorite operating system? eunuch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get payed for doing nothing all day? Become an FBI agent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wouldn''t piss on Donald Trump if he were on fire. But for $100,000 a few Russian hookers will.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a refrigerator and a child? It isn''t a crime to stick your meat in a refrigerator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t Trump have a pet dog at the White House? He only pets pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is like the biggest fish I ever caught. Just keeps getting bigger and bigger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son asked me if I like his hand after he taped a bunch of coins to it I said I like the change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make one million dollars in a month? Start with five million and become a day trader.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are cars, computer parts, and animals similar? Dodge Ram, RAM, and the ram.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Added Paul Walker on Xbox Live We never really get around to playing games though, he''s always just stuck on the dashboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I stopped a rape from happening today! All I had to do was stop chasing her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lost 130lbs & gained a new life. Soon I''ll be rolling in pussy! Girlfriend is gone now, but she left her pregnant cat behind on the bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Audi botched their new commercial I guess they can say Audi-ous to their customers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every "yo momma" joke has been done thousands of times, by thousands of different people. Kinda like yo momma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WWII, two Soviet soldiers, who both used to be theater announcers, are sitting in the trenches... Then they hear the radio announcement: "Comrades, it''s with a heavy heart that I must tell you this bad news: city of Bryansk was occupied by the Germans today." One of them says to the other one, "Pfff, you call that a city? Two 500-seaters at best!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Donald Trumps first comment after moving into the Oval Office? "Hey fellas, it''s so nice of you to leave some condoms for me in the desk drawer, but their diameter is about 3X too large!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than ants in your pants? Uncles in your pants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life as a redditor I saw a pretty girl. Finally I plucked up the courage, and asked for her number. She said "got a pen?" I said yes. She said "well get back in it you fat fucking pig".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is red and smells like blue paint Red paint', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse were in divorce court and the judge said to Mickey... "You say here that your wife is crazy." Mickey replied, "No I didn''t, I said she was fucking Goofy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get why everyone is so worried about Trump. He hasn''t even been in office for a month. I''m sure once he has some time to learn and get things done, America will turn out all white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just heard Michael Vick retired... Doesn''t surprise me. He was an old dog anyways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An antidepressant a day Keeps me from blowing my head away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I keep telling my female friend that my dick is great... She just needs to be in a position to appreciate it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Charles Umar Terrence-Elliott Able to get so many dates? People always think he''s cute, initially.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[nsfw] What did Trump feel when he heard about the civilian casualties in Yemen? Beluga caviar popping against the roof of his mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats something that''s hard and long and full of seamen? A submarine of course!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are people with aspergers really not able to detect sarcasm? Sorry to break it to you, but I think you have aspergers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends are hanging out one day, Jim, and Bob. And Jim has a black eye. Bob asks, "Hey what happened to your eye?" Jim sighs and explains, "Well, I was in church, and we''re all standing, and well, the lady in front of me, her skirt was tucked into her ass-crack! So I reached forward, and pulled her skirt out! She turns around and pops me right in the face!" So, a week later, these two friends meet up again, and Jim shows up with ANOTHER black eye! Bob says "Dude, did you do it again? You can''t just pull a lady''s skirt out like that!" Jim replies, "Nope, nope, so I''m in church again, right? And the same lady is in front of me, and the exact same thing happens! Her skirt was stuck in her ass again! Well, the guy next to me sees it and he pulls her skirt out of her ass-crack! But I knew she didn''t like that. So I tucked it right back in there!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, I''m a lesbian "That''s okay", says her dad "We still have your sister." "Sorry dad", says his second daughter "I''m lesbian, too" Their father sighs: "So nobody here digs men?" "I still do!" calls his son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Shakespeare say on the last day if his summer vacation? Once more unto the beach', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just heard there''s a cure for dyslexia It was like music to my arse', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a few seconds one whispers to the other Thats got to be the fastest we ever got to the accident site.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s something sinister about the woman who stands next to me at the male sex doll factory She gives me the willies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The MOMA announced that they were opening a new section in the museum for art from Madrid. Nobody expected the Spanish exhibition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy with no limbs in a pile of leaves? Russell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New Patent A company has just requested a patent for a laser that prohibits name brand sunglasses: A Ray-Ban ban ray, if you will.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was so poor growing up If I didn''t wake up with an erection I had nothing to play with', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two silk worms Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is giving her kindergarten class a spelling test. She asks a boy named Paul to spell the first word. ''Paul, spell dog.'' Paul answers, ''D-O-G.'' ''Very good!'' says the teacher. She then asks a girl named Mary to spell the second word. ''Mary, spell cat.'' she says. Mary answers, ''C-A-T.'' ''Well done Mary!'' says the teacher. She then asks a boy named Hussein to spell the third word. ''Hussein, spell discrimination against foreigners.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first time I went on a plane, I was such a caveman about it. I got lost and sat on the wrong seat twice, I banged my head on the overhead compartment (twice) and walked right up to the cockpit door mid flight because I couldn''t find the toilets, and the flight attendant got upset at me. Then, I left the plane at the destination and forgot to get my bag from under the seat, so I had to wait til everyone had left and then the FA wouldn''t let me go back and get it, said she would get it for me. Asked me where I was sitting, and I didn''t have my ticket stub, so I just said "In the back" and she looked at me as if to say "Well you sure as fuck weren''t up the front, were you?" I cried at home and almost quit the co-pilot job the following day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar every time a baby boomer insulted me... I could afford a house in the economy they ruined', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alaskan Eye Doctor I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island... but it turned out to be an optical aleutian.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would like to buy some cyanide A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription." Edit: Shit, I forgot! Credit to u/albert3us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Watson walks in on Sherlock having sex with a younger looking girl "Bloody hell, Sherlock! What''d you think you''re doing bangin'' that chick. She looks like she''s in highschool" Sherlock replied, "Elementary, my dear Watson"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Jeffrey Dahmer keep a blender on his front porch? To greet people with a handshake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Filipino, an Indian, and a Pakistani get arrested in Saudi Arabia A Filipino, an Indian, and a Pakistani get arrested in Saudi Arabia for drinking alcohol. They are given a sentence of 50 lashes each. Before execution of their punishments each of them is given a chance to ask a wish. The Filipino requests that a pillow be tied to his back. The wish is granted and he''s given 50 lashes. Indian asks for 2 pillows to be tied to his back. Again the wish is granted and 50 lashes given. Now only the Pakistani is left and he asks to please be allowed to make 2 wishes. Reluctantly, they accept his demand and ask what are his two wishes. Pakistani man says: 1. Give me 100 lashes instead. 2. Tie the Indian to my back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW]Two Scottish lasses are walking to school one morning... ...when they come upon a man passed out under a tree after a night out drinking. They approach the burly, bearded man and one girl says " I n''er seen a mans penis before. Let''s take a peek!" So, they lift the mans kilt and the other exclaims " It looks like a wee chick sitting in a nest! It needs a cute bow!" She pulls a ribbon from her hair, ties it around the sleeping mans member and they continue on their way. A spell later the man wakes, stands and begins to stretch when he feels a pinch on his boabie. He lifts his kilt and sees a ribbon tied around himself. After a moment he smiles and says to his-self: "Och, I doont know where ye been but I see ye took first place!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three blondes were driving to Disneyland... Three blondes were driving to Disneyland. When they were close to the destination they saw a sign: Disneyland Left. They stopped, started to cry and finally turned around and drove back home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What camps are designed for people with ADHD? Concentration camps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once dated a girl named Plosion but then we broke up I guess you could say she is an exPlosion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bears are eating a cannibal. Two bears are eating a cannibal. One turns to the other and asks: "Since we are eating a cannibal, are we eating more than one person?" The Other responds: "HOLY SHIT! A TALKING BEAR!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vladimir Putin takes Donald Trump fishing out on the black sea... Vladimir Putin takes Donald Trump fishing out on the black sea. After having his line in the water for a few hours, Donald finally has a bite. And its a big one. At first, he threatens the fish. I will drop a nuclear bomb on you if you dont get in this boat. It doesnt work. In fact, the fish starts to fight harder. Next, he takes to twitter This fish isnt man enough to face me on board this boat. Sad! The fish isnt swayed. So finally, Trump shouts I will send in a Navy SEAL team to kill your entire family! The fish is scared and quickly jumps on the boat. Before even taking it off the line, Trump picks the fish up and holds it high above his head. He squeezes its bladder down onto face. Trump notices Putin looking on in disgust and says, What? You knew I love Russian hookers pissing on my face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Democratic Party [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Brother has 2 tickets to the 2017 Super Bowl -- HELP! My brother has 2 tickets to the upcoming Super Bowl! He was so excited and paid the $3,500 for each ticket as soon as they went on sale. However, he didn''t realize that the game would land on the day of his wedding.. If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.. It will be at St. Francis Church in Des Moines, Iowa at 3:45 p.m. She is 5 '' 7'''' and weighs about 145 pounds. She''s a great cook, and will be in the white dress!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? a sheep can hear a zipper from 100 meters away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t milk cartons wear flip flops? Because they lactose', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown, lonely and sits on a piano bench? Beethoven''s last movement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between calling out to your hispanic friend vs calling out to your Ex? You shout "Jorge!" when calling to your friend. You shout "Hey Whore!" when calling to your ex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Local Hero saves lady from Dog A man in USA sees a dog attacking a girl! He kicks the dog, it dies! Newspapers report: "Local Hero saves lady from Dog" Man says I''m not American Report changed: "Foreign Hero Saves girl from Dog" Man says: Actually I''m Pakistani Breaking News: "Terrorist killed Innocent Dog which was playing with a girl"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black man whos an astronaut? An astronaut, you fucking racist...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All sex offenders follow the golden rule... You touch you take.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why I got divorced HUSBAND: My wife where are you? WIFE: At home love. HUSBAND: Are you sure? WIFE: Yes. HUSBAND: Turn on the blender. WIFE: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee HUSBAND: Ok my love goodbye. Another day HUSBAND: My wife where are you? WIFE: At home love HUSBAND: Are you sure? WIFE: Yes HUSBAND: Turn on the blender WIFE: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee HUSBAND: Ok my love goodbye The next day, the husband decides to go home without notice, and finds his son alone and he asked him son where is your mother? SON: I don''t know, she went out with the blender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s 4 things I hate in this world. Racism, niggers, and people who can''t count.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend asked me what to do this evening... My girlfriend asked me what I wanted to do this evening? Should we go out bowling or should we go upstairs and mess around in the bed? I told her that I am NOT going to put my fingers in some dirty hole where hundreds of guys had put their fingers in before me!!! So we went bowling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say that if you are good and righteous you will ascend into heaven... Otherwise you will split apart into small groups.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adolf Hitler has never touched Call of Duty... ...and yet, he still has a better KDR than me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find firehoes? In the alley behind the firehouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate when people ask me if I''m hard at work... Every time I am, I get written up by the HR lady.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross semen and cum? SPum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not really a religious person, but I do like to keep my weed in a hollowed-out Bible... I guess you could call me an eighth-theist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it so hard to find a priest in Amsterdam? They''re all high priests.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men are walking by a restaurant Two men are walking by a restaurant and one of them says, "That smells amazing! Lets get something." The other man replies, "But they don''t let dogs in, what are we going to do with them." The first man puts on a pair of sunglasses and has his friend do the same and says, "Follow my lead." He starts to walk into the restaurant and the waiter stops him, "You cannot bring dogs in here sir." The man gets offended, "Excuse me sir! This is my seeing eye dog, I am blind." The waiter questions this, "But your dog is a pit bull?" The man replies, "I know, I am a very important person, I need protection as well." The first man passes through and the second man begins to walk through when the waiter stops him and asks him the same question. The man replies, "This is my seeing eye dog too." The waiter replies, "Really? A chihuahua?" The man freaks out, "What?! They gave me a chihuahua?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone made Bob Ross mad *artistic screeching*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got fired for sticking my penis in the meat grinder... that punishment was nothing compared to the one I got when I told my wife that the meat grinder''s name is Jenny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my North Korean friend how it was to live in North Korea He said he cant complain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a black person nervous? Take him with you to an auction. A joke a classmate told me. Simon, if you read this: enough credits? :P', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs. Three women were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man. The first woman said "Have you ever had a hug?" The man said "No," so she gave him a hug and walked on. The second woman said "Have you ever had a kiss?" The man said "No," so she gave him a kiss and walked on. The third woman came to him and said "Have you ever been fucked?" The fellow said "No", She said "You will be when the tide comes in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy... A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye matey!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call cheese that isn''t yours? Nacho Cheese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Im graduating for my biology study in a few weeks.. Im writing a killer fotosynthesis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have discovered a rare mutation that causes autosomal dominant inheritance of violent diarrhea In hindsight we should''ve known something like that would run in the genes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a drunk man, wandering the street... And he comes across a priest. He says to him, "I''m Jesus Christ." The priest replies, "No, you''re not." The drunk is confident in his Christ-ness, and says that he can prove it. So the drunk leads the priest to a bar, professing his divinity the whole way. They arrive and enter. The bartender sees the drunk and says, "Jesus Christ, you''re here again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had to perform surgery on a lamb''s brain yesterday. Just call me a gyro surgeon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a nosy pepper do? Gets jalapeo business', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the pianist go to jail? Because he would only play with A Minor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One shudders to think how much worse the Bowling Green Massacre would have been... ... If it weren''t for the heroic intervention by Frederick Douglass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe enters a pun competition Each contestent is allowed to enter 10 puns, so Joe thinks of his 10 best puns and writes them down, after judges decided which puns won, the announcer decided to read off the 10 best, as the last pun was read, Joe was defeated, none of his puns won! No pun in ten did', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar in Bangkok... a sign reads: Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 Hand Job: $10.00 The man walks up to a barmaid. Man: Are you the one who gives the hand jobs? Barmaid: Why, yes. That''s me. Man: Then go wash your hands! I want a cheese sandwich.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lady buys cyanide A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide." The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! I''ll lose my license! They''ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now. That''s different. You didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aren''t you really busy tomorrow? "Woah buddy don''t assume my agenda"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Donald Trump fail his college math class? He was uncomfortable with the concept of integration.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time do you go to the dentist? Tooth hurty', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a pound of fat look sexy? Put a nipple on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If i had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive They would eventually find me attractive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my grandma died, I got her most prized vagina fart in a bottle. She bequeefed it to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are hippy drum circles like high frequency radiation? They both cause the formation of free radicals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirates favorite toy? Aaaarrhh Sea Boats!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a guy asked me if I ever dropped my phone in a beer before... I said "yeah, once in a Blue Moon".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the sexual orientation of a bodybuilder? Bicepsual', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to get back into my house but I can''t, There''s a door in the way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend broke up with me for listening to Linkin Park But in the end it doesn''t even matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a schizophrenic fruit? Pearanoid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl goes to the doctor... Putting his stethoscope to the young woman''s chest, the doctor said, "Big breaths, dear." She smiled. "Yup. And I''m not even thixteen yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I won''t be getting another iphone because of the horrible shellback. *spellcheck! Not shellback! Ducking phone...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the first day of school, and the teacher was going around the classroom asking each of the children to spell their names. It was the first day of school, and the teacher was going around the classroom asking each of the children to spell their names. "D-O-R-I-S L-E-H-I-G-H," said one, and the teacher dutifully recorded it in her attendance book. "T-I-M M-O-R-I-A-R-T-Y," said another. "E-L-S-I-E," said another. "No," the teacher told the girl, "I need your whole name." "Oh," said the girl. "V-A-G-I-N-A."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why would Groot make a terrible spy? Because he''s an obvious plant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s Inauguration Speech Was Uploaded onto Pornhub "Rich White Man Fucks Entire Country"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few weeks in they''re already talking about impeachment... What an un-presidented turn of events.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man brings his cat.... A man brings his cat to a veterinarian. He lives the cat there and returns in two days, as preagreed. He asks the veterinarian: Is my cat still alive? Still not...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst part about time travelling jokes? Yours considered a Repost when they take it and go back and use it before you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away... But my aim is terrible so...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a racist joke? Nevermind. None of the white people would understand it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like my pickles. Sweet and petite ( a \ a)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man steps in a diner and orders some coffee... The waitress brings it over and lies it on the table. The moment the man takes a sip, he spits it out, shouting, "This coffee tastes like boiled dirt!", and the waitress says, "I wouldn''t be surprised, it was ground this morning."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Donkey Fell Into A Bowl Of Sugar What a sweet ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your mommy ... would sit between America and Mexico Trump doesnt need to build a wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Pavlov is drinking in a bar. Then a man enters the bar and rings the bell on top of the door. Pavlov says "Oh shit, I forgot to feed the dog"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay version of Donald Trump? Flaming Hot Cheeto!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Biggie mad at 2Pac? It all started when 2pac innocently said, "Yeah, sure, it''s cool, invite all the rappers to my party, no biggie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People all over the country are dropping dead due to high blood sugar... I guess they''re suffering from a serious case of Die-betes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hungry Clock When a clock eats, does it go back four seconds?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. In my case, it is a sexually transmitted disease.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw thor reading a thor comic... to be honest, I think it might be a metathor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is still upset about me calling her fat 10 years ago... I guess it''s true what they say, elephants do remember everything. Edit: Damn, just realised someone else posted a similar joke recently. Sorry for the accidental repost, I will go home and rethink my life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the worst kind of jokes? Unfunny jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Knock Knock Joke *Knock knock* Who''s there? Erma. Erma who? Ermagerd, stop with all that knocking!!! .... so I was very tired. At least my fianc laughed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Jews so good at racing? Because they used to step on the gas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what''s really odd? Numbers not divisible by two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love hockey. It''s really an ice game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did the geologist husband and mineralogist wife buy their first home? In agated community.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer One turns to the other and asks, "does this taste funny to you?" The other responds, "no."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My refuel warning is always on, even after I''ve just filled up! I think I''m being gaslighted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the rooster cross the road His wife left him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say that Steve Jobs died to soon. But I think it was a fitting metaphor for his companys attitude to battery life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most valuable kind of sheep? A ewe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the sun annoyed to be called a she? Cause it''s a non-binary star', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you say the word poop, your mouth does the same motion as your butt hole. Same can be said for the phrase "explosive diarrhea".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the worst type of suicide ? The failed one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Soviet Russia, Muslims ban America!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-when I donate blood I don''t have to do it my self, the nurse does it.. -yes but this is a sperm bank and it''s different -awful service', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with terminal cancer is gazing at the sunset. As he''s looking back on his life and coming to terms with his death, he gets a sort of primal urge to just start digging a hole. So he grabs a shovel and digs and digs and keeps digging. He digs so far down that he breaks into the roof of a cave, falls to the floor, and dies. This joke isn''t very funny, but it sure is deep!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than 69? 77 because you get ate more. -Redd Foxx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the snail say when it rode a turtle? "WEEEEEEEEEEEE"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do plants use to fill holes in walls, Chloroplast-er', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love February because it contains two of my favorite annual events Groundhog Day, and the State of the Union Address. One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a notoriously unreliable mammal for prognostication with no basis in reality. The other involves a groundhog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who wins an argument? The side with the most points.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians? The drummer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hitler seems to get a lot of hate these days, but to the man''s credit.. he *did* kill Hitler.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do women who just got dumped and advanced programmers have in common? They both want closure!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Melania divorces Donald Trump Then an immigrant will get half of the US in the divorce settlement :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m never sure if it''s a Dad joke Are those the ones that hit you later when you''re doing something else? Or the ones you don''t get till the weekend? :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asked little Johnny a question... Teacher: If I gave you 2 cats, and another 2 cats and another 2 cats, how many cats would you have? Little Johnny: Seven! Teacher: No, listen carefully. If I gave you 2 cats, and another 2 cats and another 2 cats, how many cats would you have? Little Johnny: Seven! Teacher: Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have? Little Johnny: Six. Teacher: Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have? Little Johnny: Seven! Teacher: Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?! Little Johnny: Because I''ve already got a freaking cat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a rock guitarist and a folk guitarist? A rock guitarist can play all night without tuning and folk guitarist can tune all night without playing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and orders a drink, when suddenly he hears someone say, "Hey, nice tie!" The man looks up to try to find out who said it, but no one was around. "Hey! Nice shirt!" The man looks up again, but there''s nobody there. "Hey! Nice suit!" The man then calls the bartender over and asks him if he keeps talking to him. The bartender replies, "It''s not me; it''s the complimentary peanuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Great Friday morning! My Friday morning fun... so I was pulling into the gas station and when I got out of the car, I noticed these two police officers looking at a woman who was smoking while fueling up. I went in to get a drink and as I was checking out, I hear someone screaming. I look out and that woman''s arm was on fire! She was tossing and waving her arm around and just going crazy! I ran outside and the officers had put her on the ground and were putting the fire out with an extinguisher. I saw that the officers put hand cuffs on her and were about to put her in the police car. I was thinking "What in the world?"... so being the concerned person that I am, I asked the officers what they were arresting her for? He looked me dead in my eye and said... "Waving a firearm!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m worried about my friend. He was bragging about getting a handjob from his teacher. I said, "That''s disgusting, you''re homeschooled."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Russians, Vlad and Ivan, decided to have a race. Both long distance runners, they decided the end would be a large rock a few miles past the Russia-Finland border. Vlad was ahead for most of the race, but he faltered soon after the border and was passed by Ivan, who won. "I told you I would win!" said Ivan. "You may have won," replied Vlad, "but I beat you to the Finnish line."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I gave a girl my phone number and told her to text me when she got home. I guess shes homeless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Invisible... A psychiatrist''s secretary walked into his study and said, "There''s a gentleman in the waiting room asking to see you. Claims he''s invisible." The psychiatrist responded, "Tell him I can''t see him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kids were talking... Kid 1: I bet you''re a virgin Kid 2: I was a virgin, until last night! Kid 1: Lies! Kid 2: Ask your sister. Kid 1: Ha! I don''t have a sister! Kid 2: You will in about nine months! Edit: Thanks for the support guys!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whatever you do always give 100 %. Unless you are donating blood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his toe? Mi to sis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I see a girl, I first look at her hair. Then at her eyes, lips, neck... Damn dial-up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told my wife I was going to give her something for Valentines I''ve never given her before She said "An orgasm?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the DNA say to the other DNA? Do these genes make me look fat?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('May I sleep with your sister? is such an awkward question to ask. I have no idea how my dad is going to respond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How will Trump add yuge amounts of manufacturing jobs? He will build alternative fact-tories', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they''re ugly...and they smell bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My life completely changed after I learned Morse Code Last night, for example, I couldn''t fall asleep because the rain kept telling me to go fuck myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Uber CEO Travis Kalanick quit the Trump advisory council? He couldn''t get a ride...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. -Who''s there? -The doctor! -Doctor who? -Yes, that''s me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish military man from Israel told me this joke. Deep in the desert. Mehmet, an Arab fighter (or militant, if you will) chases an Israeli soldier, let''s call him Moshe, with an AK47 gun. Mehmet closes on Moshe and starts firing at him but misses. The chase continues through the desert, there''s quite a lot of firing from Mehmet and quite a lot of bullet dodging from Moshe. At one point Mehmet''s gun refuses to fire - Mehmet''s out of ammunition. Moshe hears the clicking of the empty gun, turns triumphantly to Mehmet and says: "Out of bullets, huh? Wanna buy some?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest asks a custodian to watch the confessional booth while he takes a piss.. While the custodian is quietly waiting, a beautiful, long-legged blonde walks into the booth. She says "Father forgive me for I have sinned it has been 1 month since my last confession, and I have given a blowjob!" The janitor isn''t sure what the priest would tell her to do so he pops his head out to ask the altar boy "hey, what do you get for a blowjob!?" The altar boy replies "usually a soda and a candy bar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I read an article that said it''s good for your eyesight to look at something distant occasionally during computer use. So I put a picture of my dad next to the monitor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing, they''re both stuck up cunts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A feminist asked me how I view lesbians... ... apparently in HD wasn''t the correct answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had a great time protesting at UC Berkeley! It was a riot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are married women heavier than single women? When single women get home, they settle in, take a peek at what''s in the fridge, and head for bed. When married women get home, they settle in, take a peek at what''s in bed, and head for the fridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Complaint from 3017: These children''s long-term zero gravity soccer leagues are raising weak adults. Every kid gets atrophy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish military man from Israel told me this joke. Deep in the desert. Mehmet, an Arabic fighter (Or militant, if you will) with an AK47 handgun is chasing a lone Israeli soldier, let''s call him Mosche. Mehmet closes on Mosche and starts firing at him but misses. The chase continues, there is quite a lot of firing from Mehmet and quite a lot of bullet dodging from Mosche. At one point Mehmet tries to fire again only to realise he''s out of ammunition. Mosche turns to Mehmet triumphantly, looks him squarely in the eye, and says: "I got some bullets in the bag. Wanna buy?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told This By A Coworker A While Back Long Btw A man gets home absolutely hammered at 3:00 p.m on a Tuesday and goes up to his wife and says, "I wanna 69 right now". The wife goes "Uhmm, sure". So they get into it and about 20min later there''s a knock at the door, so the guy gets a pair of pants on and goes and answers the door. At the door is Johnny the paper boy, and when Johnny sees the guy he starts to laugh really friggin'' hard. So the guy goes "What? What''s funny?" And Johnny points at his upper lip, so the guy reaches up and wipes his lip, and sees a smear of red on his hand, the guy immediately goes "Oh no, it''s not what you think, I was just in the kitchen eating a Jelly sandwich." And Johnny replies "I''m not laughing about the Jelly on your lip, I''m laughing about the peanut butter in your hair."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tried going to the obesity clinic before work today. But the queue was enormous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the old one about a woman doing a survey on sexual attitudes? She stops an airline pilot and asks him, amongst other things, when he last had sexual intercourse. He replies 1958. Now, knowing airline pilots, the researcher is surprised and queries this. Well, says the pilot, it''s only 2110 now. (Credit, John Cleese c. 1991)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I first met my son I thought he was a whiny little baby. But he grew on me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The husband asks the wife... The husband asks the wife: -Babe which do you like the best, strawberry or banana? The wife asks him: -Why are you at the Supermarket? The husband replys: No I''m at the pharmacy...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I almost talked my way out of a speeding ticket by telling the women officer she looked stunning.. Then I fucked up by telling her "and that''s not even the drinks talking".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer buys a young rooster As soon as it comes home, it screws all the 153 hens... The farmer is impressed thinking about the eggs the hens would hatch. At lunch, the young energetic rooster again screws all the 153 hens. The farmer got tensed up now. Next day, he finds the rooster screwing the ducks & the geese and parrot too which scared the hell out of him. Later that day, the farmer finds the rooster lying pale, half-dead & vultures circling overhead. Farmer says "You deserved it, you Hot little bastard! you deserve this "The rooster opens one eye, points up & says "Ssshhh. Let them land, I''ve never screwed a vulture in my whole career".....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oh Darling... Oh darling, since youve started dieting, youve become such a passionate kisser& What do you mean, passionate? Im looking for food remains!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just ended a 5 year relationship today. It''s okay. It wasn''t my relationship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus Christ goes up to heaven... He walks up an old man and says "Excuse me but I''m looking for my father. The old man says "That''s funny! I''m looking for my son!" Jesus says "Well, actually, my father isn''t really my father". The old man says "That''s funny! My son isn''t really my son!" Jesus says "My father was a carpenter". The old man says "That''s funny! I''M a carpenter!!!" Jesus throws his arms around the old man and say "Daaaaaad!" The old many throws his arms around Jesus and says "Pinocchio!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Juan Pablo Robato walks into a pet store Juan Pablo goes to the front counter. "Hola, my name is Juan Pablo Robato, and I am here to buy a pet. What kinds of animals do you sell here?" "Well, we mostly sell dogs, or doggos as the kids on the internet say." "Do you sell gatos?" Juan Pablo inquired. "Yes we sell cats, put like I said, mostly dogs." "Are there any other animals for sale?" "No, we only have dogs and cats here." Juan Pablo replied "So you''re telling me, if I wanted to buy a pet here, I''d have to buy a- " "Doggo or a gato, Mr. Robato." "Ah. I see."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My roommate was a monster He said he hated me with every inch of his soul. He would take ants and put them on my face and clothes. I did nothing whatsoever at him. I''ve since left that room, but I wished he didn''t antagonize me that much.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife treats her husband by taking him to a strip club for his birthday. At the club, the doorman says, "Hi Jim, how are you?" The wife asks, "How does he know you?" Jim says, "Oh dear, I play football with him." Inside the Bartender Says, "The Usual, Jim?" Jim says to Wife, "Before you say anything, He''s on the Darts team." Next a stripper Says, "Hi Jim! Do you crave the special again?" The Wife storms out dragging Jim with her & jumps into a taxi. The Taxi driver Says, "Hey Jimmy boy! You picked up an ugly one this time..." Jim''s Funeral is on Sunday!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I couldn''t be happier! For the first time in my life a girl told me she loves me. Aren''t moms great?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Raise!! Sam walks into his bosss office and says Sir, Ill be straight with you, I know the economy isnt great, but I have over three companies after me, and I would like to respectfully ask for a raise. After a few minutes of haggling, the boss finally agrees to a 5% raise, and Sam happily gets up to leave. By the way, asks the boss, Which three companies are after you? The electric company, water company, and the phone company!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are malay people so thin? Because they muslim.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What turns a fruit into a vegetable? Aids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s "meme" in French? Moimoi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need help I have a problem of creating topics just for the sake of delivering some lame ass punchline or a pun even if the topic itself is moot, and I need professional help with that. It just happens like one-two and that''s that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It confuses me why people feel comfortable with government surveillance as they have nothing to hide, so nothing to fear.... &.but get really scared when I ask them to take their clothes off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so embarrassed, I got caught getting a blow job by my mum last week.. The worst thing is it was my dad who caught us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The trump family is flying from New York to DC Donald looks down on the cities below and says "I think I''ll throw a 1000$ bill out of the window and make some american happy. Melanie says "Oh honey why not throw 10 100$ bills and make 10 americans happy?" So then Ivanka says "Even better daddy, throw 100 ten dollar bills out of the window and make 100 americans happy?" To that the pilot says " Why dont you all jump out the window and make the whole country happy?" EDIT: Thank you for the gold!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a genie lamp and it turned out to be an "animal" genie I rubbed the strange looking lamp with excitement and the genie proptly came out. Me: "this is great! So, do i get three wishes?" Genie: "no sir, i am a special kind of genie, an animal genie, i can grant you the wish to turn you into any animal you''d like. Any animal, just name it." Me: "well i wasn''t expecting this, but dog, definitely dog!" Genie: "really? A dog? I mean, you could be any majestic creature that you want. You could be a formidable rhinoceros or a mighty eagle and soar the skies looking for prey. Maybe even a whale, a dolphin, a fearsome shark, so many options to choose from." Me: "Okay, Do any of those like their own dick and balls?" Genie: "uhh.. no I don''t think so" Me: "dog it is! edit: formatting', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy and Mick walk past a police station.... Paddy and Mick walk past a police station, with a sign up saying "Two Brazilian men wanted for rape". Paddy turns to Mick and says "Ah Jaysus, dem fuckers always get the best jobs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my coffee... Hot and all over my lap while I''m driving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aladdin sings to Jasmine "I can show you the woorld.. Except the United States"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a young dog''s favourite type of pizza? pupperoni', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my jokes how I like my laundry Dry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vegetable rationing Some supermarkets are rationing lettuce, I think this is just the tip of the iceberg...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mother... - Yo mama is hairy, she shaves her legs with a weed wacker. - Yo mama is so fat, when she jumped in the air she got stuck. - Yo mama is so stupid, she tripped over a cordless phone. - Yo mama is so poor, when came over I stepped on a cigarette butt she said "who turned off the heat". - Yo mama is so fat when I walked around her I got lost. - Yo mama is so fat and stupid, when I said it was chilly out, she ran outside with a bowl. - Yo mama is so dumb she tried to drown a fish. - Yo mama is ugly, when she goes shopping they ask *her* for a bag. - Yo mama is so ugly, she got fired from the zoo. - You mama is so fat, when she jumped in front of my car, I swerved and ran out of gas. Happy Mothers day everybody!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After many years of philosophizing, I have decided to affirm the principle of non-contradiction... ...And deny it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is the bar at the ghost wedding set up? Boo''s on the left, Spirit''s on the right', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the watering hole, an elephant suddenly picked up a tortoise and flung it as far away as he could. A lion asked, "Why''d you do that?" The elephant said, "That''s the same one that bit me on the trunk 17 years ago last week." The lion said, "Wow. Amazing memory." The elephant said, "Sure. Turtle recall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a problem with my computer yesterday... So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over. Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. As he was walking away, I called after him, ''So, what was wrong ? He replied, ''It was an ID ten T error.'' I didn''t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, ''An, ID ten T error ? What''s that? In case I need to fix it again.'' Eric grinned .... ''Haven''t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before ? ''No,'' I replied. ''Write it down,'' he said, ''and I think you''ll figure it out.'' So I wrote down: ID10T I used to like Eric, the little bastard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Scrabble and a circle jerk have in common? It''s a great way for a family to come together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend just got an Amazon Echo. I said, "Alexa, hi, how are y--" She said, "I have a boyfriend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('wanna read a dirty joke... ;) a white horse ran through a muddy puddle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Turns out I''m allergic to alcohol ...It''s the damnedest thing. After 12 or 13 beers, I throw up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What currency do they use in outer space? Starbucks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ghost walks into a bar Bartender says sorry we don''t serve spirits here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Preston: Knock Knock! Mom: Who''s There Preston: Preston. Mom: Preston who? Preston let out a disheartening sigh as he walked away from the door, knowing his mother''s Alzheimer''s was getting worse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the psychiatrists who studied him, Josef Fritzl is an immature, violently angry and sexually perverted man who had an unhappy childhood and as a consequence behaves in a highly controlling way to everyone around him. I can''t help feeling that a lot of heartache could have been avoided if he had done the usual thing and become a PE teacher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can say I''m one of those prodigy geniuses who just don''t have any enthusiasm. All I need now is to be a genius.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not quite what she was expecting... Guy: I work with animals every day! Girl: That''s so sweet! Are you a vet or a pet shop own- Guy: I''m a butcher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A John Picks up a Hooker.. A John picks up a hooker. They''re on their way to the motel when she just can''t stop talking about how awesome her pussy is. They get to the room. She takes off her clothes. She says to the guy, "Put a finger in." He does. "Put two fingers in." He does. "Put four fingers in." He does. "Put your hand in." He does. "Put your other hand in." He does. "Now, clap." He says " I can''t." She says, "Tight, isn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Older couple An older couple is spending time up in the bedroom before turning in for the night. Hubby''s reading the paper while his wife is checking herself out in the mirror. Every few minutes, she lets out with a little- "Ooooh!" and "Awww!" Finally, the husband can''t concentrate and puts the paper down. "Whaaaat? What the hell is going on with you over there?" "Tsk... it''s just that every time I look in the mirror lately, all I see is that I''m getting older and fatter and uglier every day!", she says, pouting. "I could really use a compliment right now." The husband looks her up and down and says- "Well, there''s absolutely nothing wrong with your eyesight!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Do You Call a Twitchy Boat at the Bottom of the Sea? A nervous wreck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the show Jackass and CNN news? Suits', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently I visited my daughter. When I asked her newspaper, she said: Dad, this is the 21st century, take my IPad. What can I say ... this fly did not know what killed her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A joke for Donald Trump - what do you get when you cross Queen Elizabeth and Prince Charles? Killed in a tunnel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do tampons have strings attached to them? So the crabs can go bungee jumping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the winner of the beauty pageant for teenagers who''ve had an abortion? Little miss conception', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the gangster''s son tell his dad when he failed his exams? "Dad, they questioned me for 3 hours, but I never told them anything!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know of a guy who fucked millions of people at a time It was a whole nation he did this to. His name is Donald Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned out that my wife loves cocktails I told her that it''s growing your pubes in one direction and no one does that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference..... Between and suicide vest and a modern feminist? At least the vest achieves something when it''s triggered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 surgeons walk into a pub... ...The first claims to be the best surgeon of Texas: "the world''s best piano player lost 7 fingers in an accident. I sewed them back on and yesterday, he played a private concert for the queen of England." The second one answeres: "That''s nothing. A young man lost both arms and both legs in an accident and I sewed them back on. 2 years later, he won a gold medal at the olympic games." The third physician, who had been silent to this point says: "Amateurs! A couple of years ago, a young businessman overdosed on coke. He rode his horse in front of a train, tried to stop the train and was ripped into pieces. The only thing left was the man''s butt and the horses forelock. I patched him up and two weeks ago, this man was sworn in as President of the United States.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the first amendment in Super Mario''s constitution? Freedom of Peach', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John dies due to a car accident In heaven, he sees a wall of very large clocks. He asks the Angel "What up with all these clocks?" Angel answers "These clocks measure lies, every person has one clock assigned to them. Whenever you lie on earth, the clock ticks." The man points towards a clock and asks, "Who''s clock does this belong to?" Angel answers ''This clock belongs to Mother Teresa. She has never told a lie, so it hasn''t moved." John walks around and sees all sorts of clocks with different times on them. He reaches a room having clocks of the presidents. He notices that it doesn''t have Trump''s clock. So he asks "Where is Trump''s clock?" The Angel replies "That one is in our office, we use it as a table fan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fart Football An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says,"Seven Points." His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?" The old man replied, "It''s fart football." A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says "Touchdown, tie score." After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, "Aha. I''m ahead 14 to 7." Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, "Touchdown, tie score." Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, "Field goal, I lead 17 to 14." Now the pressure is on the old man. He refuses to get beaten by his wife, so he strains real hard. Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he''s got, and accidentally poops the bed..The wife says, "What the heck was that?" The old man says, ''Half time, switch sides"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Groundhog Day is a classic. It sure has great replay value.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks in to a hospital And says to the doctor "I have five penises". The doctor asked him how his pants fitted. "Like a glove" he replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I may look like a joke to you.... ...but I''m completely dad inside', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love? The swallow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t see anything wrong with the KKK It''s just the precursor to 4K TV', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cartographer get kicked out of map making club He had a bad latitude', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend liked puns too much. We called him a Pundit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a Nazi officer just lost his eyesight. I guess he can Nazi anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I apologize for all those things I said and did... I was on a lot of drugs back then. Doctor siad it wasn''t enough, so he gave me more drugs. Now I''m better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a snowman who trades sex for money? A Frostitute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was afraid that I had stepped on my child''s hamster this morning... ... but laughed when I double checked. I had just tripped on a little puddle of blood and fur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Evolutionists found the first humans were a Jewish male, a Georgian male and a Russian female... Their names were Arron Gutan, Chimpanidze and Gavrila...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Hitler sneeze? **a-jew* *', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an underpowered motorbike and an overused vagina? One''s a laggy scooter, and the other''s a slaggy cooter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Perry the pea pod greet his mate Kevin the corn kernel? Morn''in cob.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t understand why they say ignorance is bliss Trump supporters always seem so unhappy and angry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a carrot''s favorite type of dancing? Tap root dancing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a 14 year old with two broken arms favorite piece of clothing? Oedipal underwear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best part about dating a homeless man? You can drop him off anywhere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Being buried... Friend 1: What scares you the most? Friend 2: Being buried... Friend 1: Why? Friend 2: I don''t want to talk about it, the thought of it scares me to death.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the favorite sex position of Git users? Revert cowgirl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best thing about an Oprah Winfrey joke? You get the joke! You get the joke! You all get the joke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mall Security pick up a lost boy... Mall Security pick up a lost boy at the shopping center. The Mall cop asks, "Who were you with?" The little boy answers, "My Granddad." The Mall cop asks, "What''s he like?" The little boy thinks for a moment and replies, "Whisky and women with big tits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bartender says, We dont serve time travelers in here. A time traveler walks into a bar...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a gay black man? A homiesexual.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I replaced all of the incense in the Friar''s chamber with Marijuana He''s a High priest now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a new radio system in my car the other day. The thing is great, you shout Soul, and it plays Soul. You should Rock, it starts playing Rock. The other day, some kids ran past my car, and I shouted, "FUCKING KIDS!" and it started playing Micheal Jackson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the blind Mexican only saying "no"? Because he couldn''t Si', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Asian friend got his Jewish wife pregnant. I guess "Cha Ching" wasn''t an appropriate name suggestion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple were at a divorce court just a month after getting married The judge asked the wife " Why you want divorce so soon?" Wife: " He has a problem with premature ejaculation." Husband " I''m totally fine with that, its she who finds it a problem"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump never eats russian salad... He knows what Vladmir Putin it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a company that sold miniature bibles that would fit in your wallet, but if failed. The margins were too small.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Mormon at a rave? An LDS on LSD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were preparing for a night of wild sex.. When suddenly, before it happened the husband died. The wife was devastated and left unsatisfied. She decided to cut off his penis and keep it to pleasure herself, and she stuck it on a wall, and used it almost daily. Somehow, a neighbor found out about it, removed the penis, put a hole in the wall and stuck his own in there. When the wife got home that day, she walked up to the wall with a knife and said ''honey, we''re moving houses.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the mermaid wear seashells? Because the B shells were too small and the D shells were too big.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Grasshopper walked into a bar.... A grasshopper walks into a bar and orders a beer. As the bartender sets the beer down in front of the grasshopper, he remarks, "You know, we have a cocktail named after you." The grasshopper looks surprised. "What? You have a cocktail called a Kevin?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do all gay men sound the same? Because they are Homonyms', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Giving birth isn''t as painful as being kicked in the nuts I''ve never heard a man say ''let''s do that again'' afterwards', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new exchange student from Spain came into our class. We made fun of his accent at first, but it quickly became clear he was incredibly intelligent. Everyone was surprised. No one expected the Spanish erudition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Call a girl beautiful 1,000 times and she''ll never notice. Call a girl fat once and she''ll never forget it. Because elephants never forget.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t Alpacas good in the porn idustry? Because spitters are quitters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just left an interview and they told me there''d be a drug test. I''m not worried, though. I know a lot about drugs, so it should be a pretty easy test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('KGB Agents Two KGB Agents talk: - What happened to him? - He ate bad mushrooms - Why are there beating marks on the body? - He didn''t want to eat them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had a job interview today I was in a job interview today. The interviewing manager handed me his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me." So I put the laptop under my arm, walked out of the building, and went home. Eventually he called my mobile and said, "Bring it back here right now!" I said, "$200 and it''s yours." Didn''t get the job btw...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the stoner name his daughter? Mary Joanna', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Crayola truck just got robbed for profit We''re currently searching for the purple traders', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The U.S., the U.K, Germany and France all start a new game of Dungeons and Dragons in 2017. What''s the first action the U.S. makes? A Constitution saving throw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t know whether to use ser or estar.... I didn''t expect the Spanish indecision', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the college student call noodles in a kettle? Spaghe-tea, and crippling tuition costs mixed with overpriced parking fees and the text book industry scam charging him 150 fucking dollars for an edition that is just two words longer than the previous one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#NotMyGroundhog Cold weather triggers me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a loud, mentally disabled dog? A sub-ruffer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the woman who backed into an airplane? Disaster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix sodium hydroxide with hydrochloric acid? Water, and /r/leagueoflegends', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Jewish brothers are walking down the street. They pass a Protestant church whose sign read "Convert to Christianity, Receive $2000". One of the brothers said "I''m going in there to check this out" His brother says "You can''t possibly be thinking about converting to Christianity! This is your people this is your heritage!" his brother says "No no, I''m just going to see why they''re doing it" After two hours he comes out of the church and says to his brother "I have converted to Christianity, I believe that Jesus is the true lord and savior of humanity and that he will return to earth to bless us and take us to heaven for an eternity of everlasting bliss". His brother says "Well what about the $2000?" He says "What is it with you people and money?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a girl sleeps around, she gets called easy... But when **I** do it, all I get is crabs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump has been looking smaller and smaller lately. He''s on the low-fact diet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the joke about the man with a micropenis? He had a micropenis. That''s the joke. Short, isn''t it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lesbian goes to the gynaecologist... He shines his pen torch and has a decent look "Crikey, it''s extremely clean in here, Mrs", she smiles and replies "It bloody well should be. I get a woman in three times a week"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to see Don Quixote at the theater yesterday and there was a short break in the middle of the play. We didn''t know it would happen, no one expected the Spanish intermission.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to make scrambled eggs Step 1: Find omelette recipe Step 2: Follow omelette recipe until folding step Step 3: Try to fold the omelette in the pan Step 4: Fuck it up because how the fuck do you even do that Step 5: Enjoy scrambled eggs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knew an Indian who drank so much tea that he died in his tea pee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of 5 guys were sitting around and talking. A group of 5 guys were sitting around and talking. Guy #1: People who date both guys and girls are gross. They are terrible people. Guy #2: Yeah, none of them are good. Guy #3: If there is anyone here that thinks they arent the worst, you can leave. Guy #4: Wow you look mad, Guy #5, are you one of those bad gay types? Guy #5, walking out the door: No, good bi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wow, Donald Trump is President. I haven''t seen Democrats this mad since.... ...slavery was outlawed and the desegregation of public schools!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not addicted to cocaine I just like the way it smells.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four professionals are interviewing for a math-intensive position in a company The shortlist of applicants includes a mathematician, a physicist, an engineer, and an accountant. To begin each interview, the representative from HR poses a simple math problem to warm up the candidates. What is 45+18? The mathematician immediately responds "63". The physicist responds "63, plus or minus 10%". The engineer thinks for a moment and responds "63, but for safety, let''s call it 70". The accountant shuts the door, checks over his shoulder, leans in close to the desk, and whispers "*how much do you want it to be?*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a rock musician and a jazz musician? A rock musician plays 3 chords for 20,000 people, and a jazz musician plays 20,000 chords for 3 people', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand? So she can moan with the other!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Jewish people have circumcised penises? Because they''re 20% off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Muslim walrus? A halalrus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(read in vampire voice) Do you know what is ironic about a vampire penis? You, suck it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best way to run Meincraft on a Windows computer? By using DOS-Fuhrer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bartender says "Hey! We don''t serve faster-than-light particles here!" A tachyon flies into a bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do farmers get the party started? They turnip the beets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a piece of corn all by itself? A Unicorn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Puxatony Phil has seen his shadow... burned permanetly into a stone wall. He''s predicted a nuclear winter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Neil Gorsuch say when asked why he ruled against Roe v Wade? Not my precedent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate grammar Nazis But I love the alt-write. I''ll be here until I start yesterday''s hw', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Saw a midget carrying a television the other day I asked him if he need any help carrying the television. He told me to fuck off and said its an ipad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I really don''t like punchlines They hurt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a female to male surgery? addadicktome', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s rude to call someone a fob You just assumed they understand English', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do jews celebrate Christmas? By installing a parking meter on the roof.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs? A condescending con descending', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got fired from my job at Whole Foods They caught me selling half foods!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Squaring numbers is just like girls If they''re under 13, just do them in your head', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many vampires does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It depends if you Count Dracula.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst part of having sex with a 4 year old? Getting the blood out of the clown costume can be such a bitch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend and I were about to go for a late night walk. Her dad said, "Don''t forget to wrap up." I said, "Don''t be silly, she''s on the pill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you want to satisfy your hardcore food fetish? Buy my new book: 50 Shades of Grey Poupon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Americans watch Lord of the Rings? They don''t have the Two Towers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL Donald Trump played Football when he was in college. He played de fence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man and his date were parked... ... on a back road some distance from town. They were about to have sex when the girl stopped. I really should have mentioned this earlier, but Im actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex. The man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing. After a cigarette, the man just sat in the drivers seat looking out the window. Why arent we going anywhere? asked the girl. Well, I should have mentioned this before, but Im actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25&', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to a radio report, a middle school in Oregon was faced with a unique problem. A number of girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Finally, the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it was to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance guy to clean one of the mirrors. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it into the toilet and then cleaned the mirror. Since then there have been no lip prints on the mirror.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told an inmate to have a safe drive home. I''m a corrections officer, getting ready to head out at shift change: Inmate: "drive home safe" Me: "yeah you too..." Me: (thinking "oops, ouch") Coworker: "Muahahaha" Inmate: (hops into his imaginary car and shuffles to his cell making farting engine noises, screeches the brakes, steps out of his car and into his cell. Pokes his head out) "Made it home safe dad" Me and my coworker burst out laughing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Viking leaders pleasure? Leif Blower', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once bought condoms the day before a girl I was dating broke up with me. I suffer from premature emasculation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today is a ballerinas favorite day... Its 2-2', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never knew my ex wanted me back so much. In fact, today he called me "white trash" because he just had to take me out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the same about the force and herpes? They will be with you, always.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If sneezing means someone''s thinking about you... I guess that explains why I never got sick before', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats clean and dirty at the same time? A single guy just out of the shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do magicians never perform tricks behind windows? Because they are a pane to do tricks behind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a singing computer? A-Dell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there so many bakeries in the Deep South ? Because all the people down there are inbred', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MOMMY MOMMY, I DONT WANT TO VISIT GRAMPA! Shut up and keep digging...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know who''s a real lady killer? David Berkowitz (aka Son of Sam)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a dog get after going to college? A pedigree.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tourettes I took my wife to the doctors today to sort out her tourettes. Turns out she doesnt have it, I actually am a cunt and she really does want me to fuck off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde woman walks into a library Walks up to the front counter, sees the attendant and says ''Hello there, I''ll have a burger and a large fries please'' The attendant, politely responds ''I''m sorry love, but this is actually a library'' Mortified and red faced the blonde lady looks around and whispers back ''I''m so sorry, I''ll have a burger and large fries please''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Viagra Viagra should be classified as a hard drug.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the Latin word for Hipster? *Pretentious Pretentious*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men find a genies lamp. After a horrific plane crash three men end up on a desserted island. An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German. While searching for shelter, they discover a genies lamp. The Frenchman grabs it and rubs it......poof the genie appears and grants them each one wish. The Frenchman speaks up first "I want all my people togeather, every French speaking person to be in our own beautiful island. We can enjoy the arts, drink wine and smoke in church." Instantly the Frenchman disappeared. The German was very intrigued and asked for the same, "I want all my people togeather on an island, we can drink beer and eat bratwurst. Poof he disappeared. The genie asked the Englishman if he wanted the same. "Are all the French and Germans really isolated on their own islands." The genie confirms they were. " Shit then I''m good, does this place gave wifi?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of tea is sometimes hard to swallow ? Reality .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother keeps asking me when I am going to get married And my answer is always the same, "I''m sorry, mom, but I''m afraid you will not live until that moment. You have cancer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has 9 arms and sucks? Def Leppard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde get into a car accident? She thought "dodge" and "ram" were instructions', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Liberals declared leukemia to be racist There''s too many white cells.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We were having a family dinner when my grandma started telling one of her old holocaust survival stories I said, "Stop it, grandma, this is not germane right now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was one of Gregory Mendel''s conclusions Death.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a con artist with a degree in psycology? Sigmund Fraud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl, are you a popular work of fiction? "Because I want to self-insert myself into you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is quite selfish in the bedroom I gave her an orgasm last night and she spat it back in my face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They had to stop the leprosy hockey game Due to a face-off in the corner. Thank you, thank you, I''ll be here all week, don''t forget to tip your waitress', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Israeli doctor says... An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My waifu is the square root of -100 She''s a perfect 10, but imaginary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just turned on nickelodeon and saw bob the builder building a wall... ... to keep Dora from exploring.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What line should we wait in for food? "Pho queue"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t date coworkers... Not for lack of trying...it just hasn''t worked out so far.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a strange movie called "Being Vladimir Putin." It''s about a Russian dictator who discovers a secret door in the Kremlin that magically leads up the asshole of Donald Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the Tibetan girl trust her boyfriend? Himalayan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the last thing you want to hear when you''re blowing Willie Nelson? "So...I''m not actually Willie Nelson."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of people Those who recycle binary jokes, and those who recycle other jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abortion jokes are really shallow... They always fail to deliver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dyslexic person... Walks into a bra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Trump become president?!?! Asks the country getting its weather forecast from a groundhog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A penguin goes to the mechanic A penguin''s car breaks down and he takes the car to the mechanic. The mechanic tells him to come back in an hour. The penguin goes wandering around town and he stumbles upon an ice cream store. He buys some ice cream and goes back to the mechanic. The mechanic says "It looks like you blew a seal." The penguin responds "No, no, its just ice cream."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Iran bans Americans from traveling there. Won''t beheading there anymore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Elephants weigh more than rats. weigh more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had bad breath this morning So I exSpeaminted with Wrigleys gum.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Trump says, "Fuck You" to you, don''t be angry... because rather being angry, you need to be worried. He is a man of his words, so run and hide if you can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most literary vegetable? A punion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant woman and husband attend a pregnancy class together. The doctor is explaining to the class how to make pregnancy and delivery easier on the couples. He goes on to explain how it''s very beneficial to walk during the pregnancy, as it is good for exercise and such. The doctor explains to the husbands they should encourage it by accompanying them on their walks. A slow pace and frequent stops is recommended, as well as walking on grass or other softer surfaces. After the doctor finishes he asks for questions and one husband raises his hand. The husband says "would it be ok for her to carry the clubs too?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went up to this really cute homeless girl and asked if I could take her home She looked ecstatic until I picked up her box and started walking away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the nose in the middle of the face? Its the scenter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are black people so good at basketball? because it''s all about running, shooting, and stealing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Samurai so easy to kill? There are only chinks in the armor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the Mexicans favourite game? Borderlands', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('America in the 1930s be like: I have crippling depression.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A partially deaf guy and his wife are having a baby. The wife has a fairly hard labor, there were a few complications but all was well and now have a beautiful baby girl. The husband turns to the doctor and asks, "So doc, when can we..uhh..be intimate again?" The doctor smiles and tells the man, "About 6 to 8 weeks." The man loses his shit and yells, "68 WEEKS!" **Disclaimer:** This is a totally true story that happened to my loving mother and father who tell this story every chance they get.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you call a Fay in black robes? It is a Faygoth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is E.T. short for? He has really small legs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stop with all the Chuck Norris jokes It''s not like he''s god, he''s just an actor who played a character. If he is indeed a god, I dare him to appear in my house and do his worsdhrgusfjdfhcyzyhuxujxxuxuxz448"7"7$7**dufnfjufkfickggbnffu37jkvocififfiesduducififiiewskofuayaudofoifdud2645udux3kfkfidiiif', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so horny. I need to go home and pound my wife ...in the head with a skillet, so she can''t hear me and the girl I brought home having sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much does high speed internet cost in Australia? NINE-HUNDRED DOLLARYDOOS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do marxists only drink herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare line', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hi there, I''m here for Club Paradox Actually this is Oxymoron Club. "Ok, same difference." looks at group Oh, this guy is good.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the black guy have cocaine sprinkled on him? The cops were out of bullets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was changing the 15 fuses at the Buzzfeed HQ building Number 5 shocked me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So the British government have just produced a white paper detailing their plan of leaving the EU Well, they weren''t about to use black or brown paper now were they?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Cuban that immagrated to Spain? Spain-ish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and my dad have been butting heads... ... since before I was born', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the vampire turned poet? He went from _bat_ ... to __verse__!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a female magician? An assistant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a black man... I saw a black man in Nikes running down the street carrying a 55" TV and I thought to myself, "Is that mine?" Then I remembered that mine wears Reebok.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My penis was in the Guinness book of world records... Until the librarian screamed at me to take it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muslims in America [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of French rabbits running backwards? A retreating hare line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the space between a woman''s breasts and her hips called a waist? 18+ Why is the space between a woman''s breasts and her hips called a waist? Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are feminists so good at math? Theyre skilled at triggernometry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police arrested two kids yesterday One was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m like a bull in a China Shop... If "China Shop" is what you call your mom. [OC]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst part about time travelling jokes? Punchline? Never heard of him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When someone asks why you don''t have muscles "My muscles are just like John Cena. You can''t see me"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Didn''t know groundhogs are part Didn''t know groundhogs are part of the Stark family . They always think Winter is coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dog has been acting up lately... I think it''s fed up with it''s gender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Presidents does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. He''s too busy screwing his daughter in the oval office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs... Because they always take things literally.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta last night... Now it''s a Ford Focus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The NATO battleplan began to fall apart just as the battle started. All the nations troops were in the planned positions. However what no one expected was the Spanish in-position.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pornhub now makes you view an ad before you can watch your video. Is this what the world is coming to?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the guitar player get arrested? For fingering a minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a joke? So did Helen Keller.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stringed Bikini''s Stringed Bikini''s are making our beaches see-shores.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked Yoda for his opinion of the play Les Miserables "Lame is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a baby horse, wrapped in aluminum, who was stopped from committing his dastardly plan? A Foiled Foil Foal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the biggest similarity between feminists and linebackers? Everything that happens to them is offensive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk guy walks into a bus and sits next to a very ugly lady. The drunk guy stares at her and says: -Shit, you are the ugliest woman I''ve ever seen in my life. The lady looks back at him and says: What about you? You are wasted and you look disgusting! The drunk guy replies: -That''s true, but i''ll be fine tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus walks into a restaurant with his Apostles... and says to the host, "Table for 26 please". The host, confused said, "but Jesus, it''s just you and your 12 Apostles, that only makes 13". To this Jesus replied, "Yeah, but we''re only going to sit on one side of the table."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I became a proud dad today! My son is actually 4 but he was a boring little cunt for the first 3 years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a sadist and a masochist? One practices the golden rule.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL short people experience an wage gap comparable to that of blacks They should really rise up against it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? Your mum can''t take a joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if you''re best friend is gay? If his dick tastes like shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A step-by-step guide of how to tell if your girlfriend is cold: 1) She won''t stop fucking telling you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last night, my wife asked me to make her "feel like a woman" I took off my shirt, and told her to iron it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the man remember where he left his glasses? It was all a blur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not anti Semitic I''m anti semantic I can''t stand a wordy Jew', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a good secretary and a great secretary? A good one says, "*Good morning.*" A great one says, "*It''s morning.*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of people in the world... .. those who understand binary, and those who get laid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My buddy was watching a video of an NFL player involved in domestic violence. I asked, "What position did he play?" He answered..... Kicker', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Frenchmen have a hard time counting to four? Because there''s a tree in the way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Melania and Ivanka were having a conversation in the rose garden. Melania asked Ivanka if she could go into the house and grab something her. "I''m going to need a few secret service agents for that" replied Ivanka. Melania nods her approval. After 15 minutes, Ivanka and the agents are struggling out the door trying to balance this huge beautiful light fixture. Melania is now very irritated and angrily yells out "I can''t take this anymore! Where''s my husband!? What do I need a chandelier for!? I asked you to bring out that broken charlatan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said ''''may contain nuts.'''' Well, YES! That''s what I bought the buggers for! You''d be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the toughest commandment for IV drug users to follow? Don''t take God''s name in vein.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Germans call a broken toilet? A scheizer geyzer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('11 a.m. is always such a hard time for me I should probably stop taking Viagara with breakfast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Jewish person''s favourite martial arts? Judo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What group of limbed people is the worst at karate The deaf', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde''s Brain Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? A: Pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Tommy asks his mom if he can have some animal crackers Little Tommy asks his mom if he can have some animal crackers. His mom gives him a box of crackers and tells him he can have a few. His mom leaves and comes back in a few minutes finding all of the crackers on the floor with Tommy looking through them. His mother asks "What are you doing Tommy?" Tommy replies "It said don''t eat if the seal was already broken. But I can''t find a seal!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you combine an organ and jam? A hearty breakfast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Earbuds so today one of my friend was wearing ear buds and im like: YOU MAY HAVE EAR BUDS, BUT I GOT MY BUDS EAR! and i grabbed my friends ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wearing a turban walks into a doctor''s office... and the doctor says "What''s wrong with you?", to which the man replies "Doctor, can''t you see I''m Sikh?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you don''t want your grades to sink like the titanic..... You should try to keep them above C level', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used my Google Rewards on a video of Caitlyn Jenner It was worth the transaction', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the doctor''s office with a black eye... The doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The man says, "Well doctor, you''re not going to believe this, but this happened at church! The pastor asked us all to stand, and when we did I noticed the woman in front of me had a wedgie. So naturally, I reached forward and pulled her dress out for her, but then she turned around and punched me in the eye! Unbelievable..." The doctor then prescribed some painkillers and sent the man on his way. One week later, the man returns to the doctor with another black eye. "What happened this time?!" the doctor exclaims. "Well doctor, you''re not going to believe me, but this happened at church again! The pastor asked us all to stand, and wouldn''t you know, the same woman in front of me had another wedgie! The man next to me reached forward and pulled her dress out for her, but I knew she didn''t like that, so I reached up and tucked it back in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know an NP-Complete joke but once you''ve heard one you''ve heard them all', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is America''s favorite drink? Liber-Tea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time to train for my favourite winter sport. Extreme Hibernation....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about the cow that jumped over the barbed wire fence? It was an "udder" disaster!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some say laughter is the best medicine. I prefer sedatives.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I invented a sandal for people with one leg. It was a flop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2020 Olympic High Jump Results: Gold- Mexico Silver- Mexico Bronze- Mexico', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a truthful Native American? Pocahonest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guess what Chicken butt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a golf ball and a G-spot? Guys will actually look for the golf ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only interview you can never fuck up is the exit interview. No HR is going to say "Sorry. You''re rejected. You''ll have to continue working with us till your last breath."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the sign on an out of business brothel say? Beat it. We''re closed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had the strangest sexual encounter of my life last night "Had the strangest sexual encounter of my life last night," Bill said to Frank. "A blind call girl" "Really?" said Frank. "Yeah. You gotta hand it to her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Giant Pandas are the least racist animal... They''re Black, White and Asian!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is it time for bed at Michael Jackson''s house? When the big hand touches the little hand. Woooo Shamone!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus and Moses go fishing... While in line at the canoe rental place Moses looks over at Jesus and asked him, "Cant you walk on water? Why do we need a canoe?" Jesus remembers his ability and tries to walk across the river but falls knee deep in the water. Moses then says, "Maybe you need to get a running head start. Try over there on the dock." Jesus gets a running head start but ends up falling into the river once again. He is perplexed as to why this is not working. Moses then says, "Wait Jesus, did you have holes in your feet last time you did this?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Donald Trump and Kanye West? 4 years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alt-Right does nothing for our Word Ctrl-Right, though, moves us to a whole new Word. Obligatory I''m here all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the Second World War, a Briton,and a Pole were captured by the Germans During the Second World War, a Briton,and a Pole were captured by the Germans. Each man was sentenced to stand before a firing squad.The Briton was the first to be put again the wall. Standing back, the German officer said, "Ready, aim- At which point the Briton interrupted by shouting "Earthquake!" The firing squad ran for cover, and the Briton escaped Regrouping, the Germans put the Frenchman against the wall. Once again the oberst said,Ready, aim "Flood!" Taking a leaf from the Briton''s book, the Frenchman yelled. Once again the Germans panicked, and the prisoner escaped Finally the Polish resistance fighter faced the guns, ready to repeat the ploy of his pre-decessors. The oberst said, "Ready, aim- "Fire!" hollered the Pole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What cereal does President Trump stockpile at the White House? Cheerios...Made for little hands!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pig with no legs? Ground Hog! Happy Groundhog''s Day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife told me if I kept making puns about my dark yellow glove then she''d leave me. I told her I could see where she was coming from, even I found it annoying I mustard mitt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a man and a wife were walking.... The wife sees a dog licking itself and whispers to her husband "I wish I could get down like that." The husband replies "I suggest you ask if you can pet em first"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a physicist''s preferred city of residence? Velo City.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of faucet is only Cold? Farrah', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between hemophilia and virginity? None. One prick, and it''s all over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most common blood type in Taiwan? Taipei', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pregnant - Beyonce Pregnant with twins - Beytwice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My baby finally spoke her first words She said "Google Lady Gaga"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy kills a butterfly A little boy kills a butterfly. Dad says, "No butter for one week!" The little boy kills a honeybee. Dad says, "No honey for one week!" Mom kills a cockroach. The little boy turns to his dad and says, "Are you gonna tell her or should i do it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time flies like an arrow fruit flies like a banana', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are magicians lousy reporters? They always ask trick questions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a chemistry joke repost... All the original ones Argon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best pattern for a banker''s suit? Checks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Amish girl keep getting pregnant? Too many mennonite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Groundhog just saw a Muslim outside Gobblers Knob. Predicting six more months of travel ban', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats lopsided and provocative? A stripper who had a stroke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone asked me "What''s the longest time you ever went without sex? " 16 years. Once. When I was young.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the piece of chalk cross the road? There was treasure buried underneath.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Muslims were banned? How many Muslims were banned? Allah them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Onions. I remember crying when my dad chopped onions. Onions was a good dog. I miss him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a joke about Sodium? Na Want to hear a joke about Sodium Hypobromite? NaBrO', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eyes Specialist Doctor: Hello, did you come to see me with an eye problem? Patient: Wow, yes, how can you tell? Doctor: Because you came in through the window instead of the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do say farewell to a cat? You ask him to have a mice day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the math book sad? It had lots of problems. [My little brother told me this earlier.]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is alot like a Dragon Ball Z villain He has yet to sign his final form! Bahahaahaaa I love coffee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Muslim walks into a gay bar And says "shots for everyone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Groundhog sees Trumps shadow. . . Four more years of Nuclear Winter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('100m Dash A girl says to her friend "The last time I had sex was like the 100 meter dash" Her friend says "What, over in 6 seconds?" "No, with 8 black men and a gun."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Date night I was on a date with a girl last night and the conversation started to get steamy. She was holding my hand and I said; "just by using these fingers I could make you scream." Seductively she leant forward and purred "well go on then, show me..." So I poked her in the eye!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the company that makes wooden counters say to their client? "We stand behind our product"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump cured me... of impostor syndrome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just went to my first biweekly Screw Trump party I''m gonna try his gays only one next week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men are out hunting when one of them suddenly drops dead Two men are out hunting when one of them suddenly drops dead. He calls 911 immediately. The operator says "Can I help you sir?" The man replies "I think my friend is dead! Get an ambulance! What should I do?" The operator replies "Okay, calm down sir. First we have to make sure he is dead." There is silence, then a gun shot, then the man comes back on "Okay, what now?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bean get released from the mental asylum? It wasn''t a nut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: "Mom, Dad, I am gay...." Mom: Stares at Dad Dad: Clenches fist Mom: "Don''t!" Dad: Sweats Profusely Mom: ... Dad: "HI GAY, I''M DAD"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they''re stuck up bitches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my agent what time I should arrive to be paid for the Elvis impersonation gig. He said it''s 1 for the money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which monkey can fly? A hot air baboon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump''s favorite cuisine Canadian? Because he loves to have a mouthful of Poutine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the dogs understand each other. Because they didn''t have any common scents. Ha ha ha... I''ll see myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of penis do Chinese mice have? Mousey dongs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: Donald Trump elected 45th President of the United States! I know this already came out, but I am just now believing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told the judge "I discovered my wife in bed with Danny!" He said "No you didn''t! Danny already knew she was there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Having a foot long penis would be a real pain in the ass But not for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While walking through the mall I spotted the Islamic Book Store and I went in. The clerk asked me, "can I help you?" I said, "yes, can you tell me where I can find Donald Trump''s book on refugees?" He turned beet red and said, "eat shit, get the fuck out and stay out." I said, "yes, that''s the one, now where is it located?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dentist reminded me of my wife''s sensitive gag reflex My dentist reminded me of my wife''s sensitive gag reflex. We laughed & laughed. Then I remembered that my wife & I have different dentists', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are your chances of getting laid by a super religious female? Nun', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today needs to be Lobster or steak day... Because this groundhog tastes like crap!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An atheist, dyslexic insomniac spends all his nights wondering About the existence of dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Aussie say when his friend ran out of TP? Bidet mate!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know they make a divorcee Barbie now? She comes with all of Ken''s stuff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are you up at 6am despite wanting more sleep? SIR I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sir Mix-A-Lot runs in 2020. He''ll grab her by the tushy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been secretly tossing pears at my neighbor for a couple weeks now I can hear him talking to his wife about government drones trying to drive him crazy, but he''s just pear annoyed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cat can read the hands of a clock to know when it''s nap time. It''s nap time when the hours-hand is shorter than the minutes-hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the name of a motorist fan in the Netherlands? Bus van Truck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thank god I wasn''t born in China... I don''t even speak Chinese!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The groundhog saw his shadow. Four more years of suck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mercury asked the Sun what he was. The Sun said: I''m a motherfucking star boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told my friend she couldn''t take critism She told me to go to hell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the warring religious sects say to each other after they made peace? "Good Shiite." "See you Sunni."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John and Nancy were married for 40 years and decided they wanted to renew their vows and planned a second wedding... They were discussing the details with their friends. Nancy wasn''t going to wear a traditional bridal gown and she started describing the dress she was planning to wear. One of her friends asked what color shoes she had to go with the dress. Nancy replied, "Silver." At that point, her husband chimed in, "Yep, silver...to match her hair." Shooting a glaring look at John''s bald spot, Nancy''s friend said, "So, John, I guess you are going barefoot then."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As I was approaching my driveway, I saw a big black man running away with a TV in his hands and I wondered if it was mine. Upon entering my house, I was relieved to see that mine was at home polishing my shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my cat won for "Best Feline Butt", we expected to get a small plaque. But it wasn''t. It was a huge catasstrophy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a #2 pencil. (With thanks from my dad)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Friar, a Rabbi, and a Buddhist Monk Pray for the Dictator Three representatives of three different faiths come to mourn the dictator, who was shot at range. The Christian friar exclaimed: -Ave Maria! May the worthy pass into the afterlife. The Rabbi exclaimed: -By Moses! Let there be light at the end of the tunnel. Finally, the Buddhist exclaimed: -By Buddha! Prepare for Nirvana. Let his soul be as pure as his heart. A silence followed. The friar eventually leaned over to the monk and whispered: -He was shot in the heart. Did the news not reach you in time for the prayer? whereupon the monk replied: -Dear brother, it was premeditated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pet snake just lays around and won''t move I think he''s suffering from a reptile dysfunction', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about fouls in Soccer? You''ll get a kick out of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They call my penis the truth.... The truth can be a real dick sometimes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was stunned last night when my wife told me I was too wrapped up in myself.... When did I get a wife?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde joke A blonde is trying to hammer down a pin into a wall, she has the flat end to the wall and is hammering the pointy end. She gets really pissed as it clearly isn''t working. Her friend comes in and asks whats wrong. "Well, this pin just work! It''s not piercing this wall!" she says. Her friend looks at her and says " You idiot, You got the wrong pin! That pin is clearly for the wall on the oppsite side!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just after my wife had given birth, I asked the doctor, "How soon do you think we''ll be able to have sex?" He winked at me and said, "I''m off duty in ten minutes - meet me in the car park."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s okay to laugh during sex but just don''t point.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the US, there is house theft every 7 seconds Doesn''t that mean walls should be built around houses?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My company got bought out by a Madrid based firm today. Really blind-sided everyone. Nobody expected the Spanish Acquisition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Linux user''s favorite game? sudo ku EDIT: First post with 100+ upvotes. Thanks all you people :D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One more for the road. Abu Al Abid went to USA for the first time, He opened a furniture shop & a lingerie shop. In 6 months.... he made a good business. . He sends an email to his wife saying: Please rush, pack up & come to USA, I sold 100 mattresses and 5000 panties. I made $100,000. She replies: It is better that you close your shop and come back fast. With 1 mattress & with no panties I made $300,000.. ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An unmarried couple start a jazz band. What would they call it? Premarital sax', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a constipated detective? No shit Sherlock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday an Iraqi Imam made history when he said someone in Iraq had told a lie. It was the first time a Trump supporter accepted at face value a statement form an Imam without feeling the need to reach for a gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is your FAVORITE pun? Mine is, "Dogs Can''t Operate a MRI Machine......but Catscan"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what do you call the god of melting ice? Thaw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? It''s okay, he worked it out with a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Am I the first man you have ever loved? he said. "Of course," she answered "Why do men always ask the same question?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a potato that becomes US President and silences the news, silences government agencies, silences government funded science and ends international treaties? A dic-tater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The light at the end of the tunnel, Are the front lights of a train.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('my wife accused me of being immature. I told her to get out of my fort.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve just moved into a six bedroom house with three acres of land. Don''t tell the owners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Youre one in a million China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if youre a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do economists exist? So accountants have someone to laugh at.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hunting Two guys are out hunting in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesnt appear to be breathing, his eyes are glazed over. The other man pulls out his phone with trembling fingers and calls 911. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Please stay calm. I will help you. First of all, let''s make sure he''s dead." Theres a silence, then a gun shot. The guy gets back on the phone and says "OK, now what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Russian guy in a Racecar? Snowspeed xD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy: We need to stop testing our products on animals. Boss: Why? Shampoo companies do it all the time. Guy: Ya but we make dildos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to work at a bra factory but it went bust.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman held a seance... ...for her dead husband who , during his life, was a waiter in an high end swanky restaurant. The room was lit up with candles and the medium went into the trance. After few minutes the table started shaking. "Phil? Is that you?" she asked "talk to me, Phil." "No!" replied a ghostly voice "It''s not my table!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the late night train.... On a late night train, I was alone in a carriage, this pretty young thing boards. I stared at her. She snapped "what are you looking at? " I sighed. "6 to 8 years if someone else gets in this carriage."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Lynyrd Skynyrd''s biggest hit? The ground. Follow-up line: It was a Buddy Holly cover.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Chinese woman with no legs? Dragon lips', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know? Type O Blood was actually meant to be Type Zero blood, due to the lack of glycoproteins in the red blood cells. It was misread and is now called Type O blood. I guess you could call it a typo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey Honey! "Today, I went out and a saw a woman that looked identical to you, just fatter!" "Well, did you find her attractive?" "Shit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Donald Trump''s least favourite rock band? Foreigner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the advantage of living in Switzerland? Well, its flag is a big plus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a mental hospital A bloke is visiting his mother in a mental hopsital when in the same room he comes across a guy moving his arms around and making beeping noises. "Excuse me", he asks him. "What on earth are you doing?" "I''m driving my car!, says the guy excitedly. "Beep beep!" "You fucking nutbar, you''re not in a car, you''re in a mental hospital!" A voice comes from the bed opposite. "Mate, shut the fuck up will you, he''s giving me twenty quid a day to wash the cunt."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you hear pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because their P is silent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife always asks me: if she dies, will I remarry? And I say don''t be silly honey... I never make the same mistake twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the porcupines say when they kissed? Ouch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a truckload of sand and a truckload of babies? You can''t unload sand with a pitchfork', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the SI Unit for measuring Light''s Weight? Hologram.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife walks in on her husband, in bed with another woman. "Helen, is that you?", says the husband surprised. He turns to the woman next to him. "Then who is this?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mechanic thinks i''m in denial over my brake fluid leak. But he''s wrong; I can stop any time i want.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Barbie on fire? A Barbecue! Be gentle. First post. And I remember making this up on a long car ride when I was just 4:)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rucksacks are some of the most trustworthy things you''ll ever own I mean, they''ve always got your back amirite', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a women who cant make a sandwich? Single', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You already know the punchline. What is the worst part about time travelling jokes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Kind Of Jam Would You Not Like On Your Bread? A Traffic Jam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t the sun go to college? Because it already has 28 million degrees', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a doll and a baby? You can''t paint with a doll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did George W. Bush cross the road? To ask his dad how to run the presidency.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: So do you like guys with low self esteem? Girl: Of course, yes, I do Me: Please don''t lie to make me feel better', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the sailor think his wife was cheating on him? Because his boat was filled with seamen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Trump so keen to stay with the queen in the UK? He heard she has golden bathrooms and can''t wait to try out the showers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage is like smoking... we believed they are good at first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t women have dirty minds? Because they''re constantly changing them...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So if Trump doesn''t like conversations with Turnbull and Australians don''t like conversations with Turnbull, is Turnbull... ... Malcolm in the middle?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three women are in a bar talking about how loose they are... One fits a hot dog in. The next fits a cucumber in. The last one slides down the barstool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cerebral Necrophelia Gives new meaning to the expression "I fucked her brains out"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To all these people telling America n Americans to go fuck themselves I think they already took care of that in November!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My secretary reminds me of my wife. I was unbuttoning her blouse at lunch today when she said, "remember, you have a wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winter is coming. Can I watch?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the feminist say before shooting up a school? Trigger warning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the debacle at the USDA''s beauty pageant? They crowned a Miss Steak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much is a pound of brains worth? What''s the cost of a pound of physicists'' brains? About $10.00 What about a pound of chemists'' brains? Oh.... Around $100.00. Okay, so, what about a pound of philosophers'' brains? $1,000,000.00. What? Seriously? Why? Oh, well, just think of how many philosophers you''d have to kill to get a pound of brains out of them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump get''s his wall. (long) Trump, A Canadian and a Mexican, end up on a deserted island. While looking for supplies to survive Trump finds a Lantern, seeing the goldish colour of the lamp Trump rubs it. Summoning a Genie; The Genie announces that he will grant three wishes to all that have found his Island. Trump wishes first; "I want a wall, the best wall, all along our borders 50 feet... no 2000 feet tall, it is going to be the greatest wall, we should have the best wall, the biggest wall, it should be the biggest wall in history" The Genie looks at Trump and says, Granted. The Canadian Looks at the Mexican and says, "I want to know how high the wall is, and how strong it is" The genie says "The wall is 8000 meters tall, and strong enough to hold back an ocean." The Mexican smiles looking at the Canadian. "Fill it with water"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage and Divorce The boy and the Girl: Boy: Ah, finally, I''ve waited so long. Girl: You want me to leave? Boy: No. I dare to not even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of course. Lots! Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: No! Why are you asking me? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every time I get the chance! Girl: Will you ever hit me? Boy: Are you crazy? Of course not! Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling? Now read it bottom up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does somebody want most when they''re stranded in the desert and their camel runs away? They want their camel bak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So an Indian, a Chinese, and an American are in a plane The plane starts falling because it has too much weight, so the three men decide to throw out the things they need least to reduce weight. The Indian man throws out a bowl of curry. "I have too much of this in my country." he says. The Chinese man throws out a bowl of noodles. "I have too much of this in my country." he says. The American man pushes the Indian and Chinese man out the plane. "I have too many of these in my country." he says.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know you can tell the gender of an ant by tossing it in water?! If it sinks... girl ant! If it floats... buoyant!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do melons always have big weddings? Because they cantaloupe!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Canadians say "Ay" and Mexicans say "Si"... Why don''t Americans say "B"?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a woman sleeps with a bunch of guys, she''s a slut. But if a guy does the same thing, then he''s gay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mellinials today definitely have it easier than previous generations... My grandfather had to cross the Atlantic to punch a Nazi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you ever bang construction workers? They''re excellent with man hole covers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After many years of studying at a university, Ive finally become a PhD Or Pizza Hut Deliveryman as people call it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are the cars built by communists no good? ''cause they''re constantly Stalin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nothing I do makes any sense. I''m unemployed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep redditors in suspense? I''ll tell you tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My overdramatic girlfriend came up to me, balling her eyes out and confessed to having the most painful period she''s ever had before I looked her right in the face and said "stop ovary acting"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought recently that I was being to hard on Trump and wanted to try to see things the way he does... So I stuck my head up my ass and I get it now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the the most charitable nation? A donation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that my alcoholic friend only weighs two pounds? Long story short, my bud light.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was trying to be friendly to some chick at a bar... So I offered her a tic-tac. She gets all defensive and says" are you saying my breath stinks? Is that why I needed tic-tac?" I''m like "whoa, calm down lady. If I wanted to give you something you need it would be mustache wax and a tshirt that says 1 cock at a time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to fly But gravity is such a let down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do black people only have nightmares? Because the last one who had a dream got shot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the fast gladiator that was a tumor covered in dough? He was a Roamin'' Tumor Roll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a 4-year olds birthday party once, it was kinda awkward... ...probably because I wasn''t invited...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jay Leno walks into a bar. Bartender says "Why the really long face?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy puts candy bar in shirt His dad always said to keep Twix up your sleeve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have the work ethic of an ox - If you tie a yoke to my shoulders and whip me until I move, I''m probably going to get a lot done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good part about trump being president is he will never forget toupee Sorry for the bad pun. Was off the top of my head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a magic car? A Lambor-genie!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do farmers like to have sex with sheep at the edge of a cliff? They push back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tribal men drag two criminals into the Chief''s hut... The Chief asked the first criminal, "You shall choose your punishment for your crimes! Choose!" "Death! Or Canyananga?" Criminal #1 thought: "Well, I don''t want to die..." "Canyananga!" The Chief responded, "Very well. Bring in... Canyananga." An ugly, giant and beastly black man walked in, took Criminal #1 to the hut next to them and proceeded to horrendously rape him. The Chief turned to Criminal #2 and shouted, "Choose!" Criminal #2 quickly replied in horror, "Death! Please!" "Fine..." the Chief told him, "But first... Canyananga!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got vagina in China, got some more in Singapore, got some booty in Djibouti But I got gonorrhea in Korea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a haemophobic vampire? A starving bat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you should test your fire alarm once a month... ... but it''s costing me a fortune in houses!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly man is out playing golf with a friend... An elderly man is out playing golf with a friend. During his turn, right before his swing, a funeral procession drives by along the border fence. The elderly man pauses, takes off his hat, and places it on his chest. As the procession drives along, the elderly mans friend stands just flabbergasted. Once the procession passes, the elderly man resumes setting up his swing. "Now hold on a second!" The elderly mans friend shouts, "That was quite a show of respect! I have never seen anything like it!" "Well, I had to do something." "Why''s that?" Replied the elderly mans friend. "I was married to her for 40 years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the console gamer cross the road? To render the building', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Different movie Wife comes home and whispers to her husband "let''s have sex like in the movies" The husband quickly gets undressed strips his wife, puts her in her knees, face fucks her then bends her over and sticks it in her ass then cums all over her face. As the wife is shaking and wiping the cum from her face she says "yea we sure do watch different movies"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve always preferred management over human resources I guess that''s just a personnel preference', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and red all over A penguin in a blender', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is masturbating off the side of Japanese whaling ships mandatory? it''s the only way to attract sperm whales.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife are getting their first baby scan After a few minutes of silent scanning, the couple ask the doctor if anything is wrong. The doctor replies: On a positive note, your child will never struggle to find a parking space.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bar games. Three men were sitting at a bar. They were bored of drinking so all decided to make a game of their evening pass time. They came up with a form of beer football, each taking turns chugging a beer for 6 points, burping after for 1 point, and farting for extra 2 points. The first guy chugs his beer, burps but couldn''t fart. The second guy chugs his beer, burps and let''s a loud fart rip. The third guy chugs his beer, belches the loudest thinking he would get additional points, finally he get up and hunches preparing to let out a massive fart when the second guy pulls down the third guys pants, and sticks his finger up the third guys ass yelling "I blocked the extra point!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once had an encounter with a Grizzly Its a long story, but just bear with me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am a judge for peanut beauty pageants My job is pretty nuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dead husband A detective asks a woman, "So, your husband hanged himself?" Woman replies, "Yes, that is correct." The suspicious detective continues, "But why does he have all those bruises on his head?" "The old fool used an elastic rope!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is long and hard to a blonde? Grade five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a barnyard revolt? A chicken coup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What lives at the North Pole and takes Lithium? A bi-polar bear. [OC, circa 2005]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asks his wife if he can cum in her ear She said "No, it''ll make me go deaf" To which he replied "Really, I always cum in your mouth and you never shut the fuck up".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the fire at the circus? Yeah...it was intense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a lady is ready for sexy time??? You put your hand down the front of her pants, and if it feels like you''re feeding a sugar cube to a horse, Hey buddy it''s time to crank up the Lynard Skynard!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me of this fish... My friend told me of this amazing kind of fish, he said it was impossible to catch! He said it broke the string on his rod! I''ve never seen it. I''ve fished for days and days... Nothing. You know? I''m starting to think that it''s not reel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a Lottery ticket today Sven: "Ollie I bought a Lottery ticket today." Ollie: "It looks like it has six numbers on it. 29, 4, 42, 11, 35, 36." Sven: "What are the odds?" Ollie: "29, 11, 35."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my Jews just how I like my juice From concentrate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is in a paradox He needs construction workers to build the wall, but he''s trying to deport all the construction workers I thought of this on the spot that''s why it''s bad sorry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock joke. Nazi: Knock Knock. Polan: Who''s there? Nazi: Nazi. Polan: Nazi wh.. Nazi: BLITZKRIEG!!! I thought I had heard this somewhere but after extensive reaserch I came to the conclusion i may have made this up myself. If anyone finds a source for this feel free to post it in the comments.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We''ve had a horrible winter this year. It was so cold, lawyers were walking around with their hand is their *own* pockets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After years of reflection I''ve decided to stop selling mirrors', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between horses and women? Horses shoes are practical', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate when people ask me what I''m going to be doing in 3 years Like come on guys, I don''t have 2020 vision!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the last Wolverine movie is a cross country chase... then why isn''t it called Logan''s Run?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You go to the bathroom Russian. You come out American. What are you while you''re in the bathroom? European.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the kidnapping at the elementary school? He''s awake now!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NSFW My SO asked me why I always make terrible puns and dad jokes I told her, "it''s just gentle ribbing, you know, for your pleasure"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken always came in another box.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest? A suicide vest gets something accomplished when triggered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say what you will about Donald Trump his secretaries and stuff think he is a greatest president ever Can''t complain!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Porsche do? Ellen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many police officers does it take to push a black man down the stairs? None. "He fell".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall? Because he had a miserable summer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the roman fighter who ate his mother in law? Terrible indigestion but he was gladiator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross a black man with an octopus? A mean cotton-picking machine!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teen is arrested for shoplifting The police call his father who immediately arrives at the police station where he is detained. As soon as he arrives, the police tell him, Police: "Sir, your son was arrested for shoplifting in the area." The father, visibly taken aback, clenches his fists. Sweating, and unable to contain himself, he breathes: "Shop lifting?! I always knew you could bench, son!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man? Then he learned how to make friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So Donald Trump signs an Executive Order reviving the Dakota Pipeline ... He says "Look at this Italian Stripper Dakota Pipilini ... laid by 100 men in 6 months!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an attractive date and a not attractive date? His bank account.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do engineers make horrible parents? Because they''re taught to neglect everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a job interview and being hired? You can tell them you''re lazy once you are hired. :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear how Reddit banned r/altright? They pressed Ctrl+Altright+Del.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dyslexic friend... My dyslexic friend told me about a laugher house near him... he said he''d go and see if it was any good... if it was he''d bring me next time... you know... it''s been a few years and he must still be in there... [NOTE: I''M SORRY IF THIS IS A REPOST OR A BAD JOKE, I JUST WANTED TO THROW A, POSSIBLY, NEW JOKE INTO THE MIX]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where should children with ADHD be sent? A Concentration Camp!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of underwear does the Alt-Right wear? Tighty Righties.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife asked if I will ever stop quoting Gangsta''s Paradise The way things are going I don''t know', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats worse than finding your wife at a brothel? Finding a fucking orangutang in a brothel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s got two wings and an arrow? A Chinese telephone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dinosaur that sings? A velocirapper', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only people that look up to school shooters... ..are the students on the ground', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is 17 referred to as the "Hot Cousin" in black jack? Because you want to hit it but you''d probably bust and everyone be pissed at you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always wondered why they say space smells like seared steak Then I remember the Challenger disaster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was reading Reddit at this Restaurant When this guy at the table next to me started grabbing his chest and fell to the floor. The waitress yelled out "Does anyone know CPR??!!" "Well heck" I said, "I know the entire alphabet!" And everyone laughed and laughed. Well ... all except one guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a quadriplegic moose wearing a Guy Fawkes mask? A non-knee moose! Ba-dum-tiss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t hydrogen want to room with fluorine in college? Fluorine was so electronegative all the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This woman just caught me looking down her top. I panicked so much I almost fell off the toilet seat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Hitler approve of his mathematicians? They were all ~z-s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want a new perspective that''s not AltRight? Try CtrlAltRight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In my day, men were men, and women were secretaries.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a new actor and just shot a pilot... ...turns out I wasn''t supposed to use a loaded gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I try not to comment about what is in the news but... I have seen a lot of hate spewed in recent days about a man who is a constant winner and overachiever, and that''s what the people who support him like about him. Yes, he''s been caught in some lies and maybe twisted the truth a little but he''s still out there proving his haters wrong time after time! Some people are just jealous of someone who is successful and has money. Throw in a hot foreign model at his side and they hate even more. You may not have wanted him in this role, but he''s there now and there''s nothing you can do about it. I know its just going to get worse over the next several days, but like it or not, Tom Brady is in the Super Bowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t take life too seriously. You''ll never get out of it alive', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('30 people were waiting in line to get punched in the face... I guess you could call that the punch line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest sees a self-made millionaire take some money out of the poorbox When the priest asks why, The millionaire looks down and replies "I just got divorced"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me at my second rodeo: This ain''t my first rodeo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of veggies do you eat before going out to the club? Turn-Up Greens', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beyonce is pregnant! She''s having twins! The media will refer to them as Bey''s BeyBeys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign of the times: if you win a million bucks as a contestant on "The Wall" ...they make Telemundo pay for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Spanish priests put on the communion bread? Soy sauce', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s not alright The altright', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My first time on an elevator was quite uplifting... The second time was a let down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of blondes were talking about things they got while shopping So i bought a new toilet brush. Is it any good? No, not really. I think toilet paper works better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: Dad, Ive never heard you pull a joke before, have you ever pulled one? Dad: Sure son, I had to pull one back in 97 Son: But thats when I was born Dad: Exactly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow get an award? because he was out standing in his field.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cannibal cross the road? To get to the body shop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if an autistic guy likes you? He looks at your shoes while he jerks off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a way to make my penis 6 inches long. Fold it in half!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Billy Mays die? He confused his Oxi-Clean with his Cocaine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Claustrophobia (fear of having no escape, and being closed) When you walk towards a pub, ... and you are afraid that it might be closed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you turn a duck into a soul singer? Put it in the microwave until its bill withers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is like bread. It''s easy to get a rise out of her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it!! How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way, unique up on it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I LOVE ISIS She''s my favorite Egyptian god', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the circumference of a circle say to its diameter? Want some pi?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey girl, are you an integral? Because I want to substitute u for my x.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the Lord said onto John: "Come forth John and you will receive eternal life" But John came 5th and won a toaster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Trump retract claims that George Soros was behind the paid protestors that have taken to the streets since his inauguration? He was jealous that Soros had created more jobs than he had.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye matey', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently someone in London gets stabbed every 52 secconds Poor bastard', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats green, fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A pool table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women call me ugly untill they find out how much money i make Then they call me ugly and poor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend recently took up origami... My friend recently took up origami, although he''s not very good at making creases, and every time he messes up he gets angrier and angrier... Trust me, you wouldn''t want to be there when it all unfolds...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an elephant crossed with a rhino? ''Eliphino?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL What a lay up was. Explains a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you turn a duck into a soul singer? Put it in the microwave until it''s bill withers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I try to teach my dad a new lesson every day. They say it''s good to learn from your mistakes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Incompetent Female Arsonist? A Farcenist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is prescribed a medication by his doctor. The doctor warns the man that because the medication has a bitter taste he should take it with something to mask the flavor, like apple juice. The man replies, "That''s a good idea. I hate the taste of apple juice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a civilian called in military slang? A collateral damage still alive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, big brains are important... but big muscles are importanter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Parents always told That you should learn from mistakes. That''s Why they have so many books about children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know a farmer who likes throwing darts at his mating donkeys for fun He''s a pain in the fucking ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had to take a drug test for Calculus. Had to take a drug test for Calc. 2 It was a P-test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you guys heard of the new semen-based hair gel? It''s the next generation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 18999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two silkworms were in a wrestling match. It ended in a tie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex Doll Do muslim sex dolls blow themselves up?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A slave say to another slave... Are you free tonight?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man saw a woman on the street and started physically abusing her She asks, "What are you doing?!" The man says "I''m hitting on you".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Daughter Texted Asking for Money... My daughter in college sent a text saying "PLZ snd $$." I asked her why she used the shorthand. She responded that it was shorter than writing it all out. I replied back "No." She asked why. I said it was shorter than writing "Yes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A factory inspector pays a visit to a ruler factory... and he walks in through the door. As he''s walking around, he notices a room with a black man in a thong, and a lot of boxes. He finds this rather odd, but he decides to ignore it. After that, the factory manager comes to greet him. "Good morning, sir", he says. "Please. Follow me." The factory inspector follows the manager to a conveyor belt. "These are our conveyor belt workers. They check the rulers on the conveyor belt for defects", explains the manager. The factory inspector nods. He then follows the manager to an area where workers are loading rulers into boxes. "These are our loading workers. They load the rulers into boxes." Once again, the factory inspector nods. Finally, the manager leads the factory inspector into the strange room he had seen before. "This is Tyrone. He makes sure all our rulers are exactly 12 inches."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just found out that Santa Clause raises livestock in between Christmas... I guess you could call him a Jolly Rancher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the Difference Between America and "Keeping Up With the Kardashians"? I don''t even know at this point...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 guys fighting over who has the smartest dog The first guys dog runs around, sets up the tent, lights a fire, and cooks a boiled. The second guy says "that''s nothing"! His dog runs around, sets up the tent, lights a fire, cooks a boiled egg, and then stands up on his front legs with his bum in the air. The first guy says, "what''s he doing that for?" The second guy says "he knows I need something to hold my boiled egg"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats a Mexican gangsters favorite brand of pants? Dickies. They love the way they feel on their ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many dead hookers in a basement does it take to change a light bulb? I''m not sure, but it''s more than four because it''s still fucking dark down there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The local police station got broke into today and they stole all the toilets... The police have got nothing to go on', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('64% of statistics are made up 90% of you didn''t know that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife wanted. A man inserted an ''ad'' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What results when you cross a Hippo and a Crocodile? Pretty sure you die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Japanese-mexican name his cat? Ari-gato', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m instructor flashbang I earned that nickname from my ex-wife I don''t get it but it kinda stuck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went on a date with a 45 year old woman. Me: Would you like a drink? Her: No thanks, I tried it once a didnt like it. Me: Oh ok, that''s unusual. Her: Not really, my daughter''s exactly the same. Me: Your only child I assume?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All these women on the 48 dating sites Ive joined, seem so fucking sad and desperate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl at work asks if I think she''s a 10... I said "you''re an 11." "Aww really?" she says with a huge smile. I said "yeah , you''ve got a great personality as well and that adds at least 10 points."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between 9/11 and a Cow? America can''t milk a cow for 15 years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4, 6, 8 and 9 have all been killed. 2, 3, 5, 7 and 11 are the prime suspects.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun asks another What would you do if someone with bad intentions gets ahold of you? Nun: I would lift up my dress Other Nun: Oh my! What would you do then? Nun: I would ask him to put his pants down Other Nun: Wow. I didn''t expect this from you. What would you do after? Nun: I would run away. I bet I can run faster lifting my skirt than he can with his pants down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy and a girl go on a first date. They go to the carnival that is in town. The guy asks her, what''s the first thing you want to do? She says to get weighed. He''s says alright let''s go, takes her to the carny that that will guess her weight. The carny guesses 108lbs, she says he''s wrong that she''s 112lbs. So she gets to pick out a stuffy. So the guy asks her, now what would you like to do? She replies, get weighed. He thinks to himself that''s odd but ok, proceeds to take her to the weigh booth again. The carny guesses her weight at 112lbs. No stuffy for her. He then asks her, now what do you want do? She replies again, get weighed. He figures this chick is crazy and this date is going no where so he calls it a night, drives her home and tells her this just won''t work. The girl walks into her apartment and her roommate asks her, how did the date go? She replies, wousy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do oysters get around? In mussel cars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve got a part time job making rubberised computer keyboards. They offer flexible shifts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got drunk and hired a cheap lawyer last night. Think I might have contracted something...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish that I could buy the new iPhone... but iBroke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t Massachusetts have a Debate team? Because it would be called the Mass-Debate team.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde get so excited when she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months? Because on the box it said "From 2-4 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bodybuilder named Scott A bodybuilder named Scott is working out at the gym and has just deadlifted 600 pounds, a personal best. Still holding the bar, he looks over to his trainer, who shouts: "Great, Scott!" And he replies: "I know, this is heavy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My name is Talia, my mother gave me that name. [NSFW] Batman: Is your first name Jenny? Coz then you''d be Jennytalia, and I hear you''re a total cu**.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best mexican food to eat while you''re watching Netflix? andchill-adas', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tragic case of malpractice and injustice So this unfortunate fellow comes down with gangrene and goes to the doctor. The doctor tells him that the leg will have to be removed. After the operation the man wakes up and to his horror the doctor had amputated the wrong leg. Of course the doctor had to go back in immediately and take off the correct leg. Months later the malpractice case was brought to court but the judge threw it out immediately as the plaintiff didn''t have a leg to stand on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many vampires showed up to the garlic eating competition? I don''t know, it was countless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finally, i can play Golf in peace. A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man. The man then replies: Yeah, well...we were married for 35 years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[OC] What do you tell a preacher when they invite you over for spaghetti dinner? "Pasta pasta, pasta." :) EDIT: Say it out loud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two fish in a fish tank. The first fish said, "How do you drive this thing?" The second fish said, "Holy crap! It''s a talking fish!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If my last name were Plate, I''d open a computer repair shop... and call it Plate Tech Tonics.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peace out. See you guys in four years -Democracy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl gets lost in the supermarket A security guard asks her ''What''s your mum like?'' ''Big cocks and vodka'', replied the little girl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a soup bowl from Krypton?! Well ... *a kryptonian soup bowl*, obviously.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump hosts Putin for a state dinner at The White House When a guest asks "Mr. President, what have the two of you been discussing all day?", to which Trump responds "Planning World War 3." The guest asks "What will that be like?" Trump: "We''re going to kill 4 million muslims and one dentists." The guest appears confued and asks "But why one dentist?", when Putin leans over, slaps Trump on the shoulder and says: "See Donald, what did I tell you - no one will ask about the Muslims."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beyonce Pregnant With Twins, Names Already Chosen Red and Yellow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was born my father said "Now I''m certain I want two children!" I was the third.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Putin, Hillary and Trump crash in a freak plane accident 100 kilometres into oacean from cuba. They all 3 drifting in saving raft. But luck! Trump finds 2 paddles, and they decide to row towards Cuba. Now they have to decide who will row. Before everyone becomes sexist, Hillary suggests to hold democratic election. After election as Hillary and Trump are rowing, Trump silently whispers to Hillary: "Don''t you think Putin cheated? There is only three of us in raft, but each of us both got 5 votes..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beyonce is having twins! I wonder if they will be Red ivy and Green ivy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wasn''t sure about how to ask the love of my life to marry me So, I decided to ask her husband for advice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to a priest . . . [OC - I just made this up!] . . . And confesses his sins. "Forgive me father, for I have sinned," he says. "I see a different woman every night." The priest frowns. "You have sinned greatly, young man, for every time you engage in intercourse with a different woman, a part of your soul is left in her. However, I forgive you." The man thanks the priest and continues on his way, vowing to never do it again - but later that night, he stumbles upon a gorgeous woman at a bar, who introduces herself as Mrs. Crux. Back at his house, he is engaging in intercourse with her. She asks him to speak dirty to her. He thinks for a moment, then cries, "You''re my whore, Crux!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn''t because I''m vegetarian and offended.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only thing smaller than Donald Trump''s hands... The only thing smaller than Donald Trump''s hands is Donald Trump''s heart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of four-year-olds were trying hard to become accustomed to school. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk! "You need to use ''big people'' words," she was always reminding them. "John, what did you do over the weekend?" "I went to visit my Nana." "No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use ''big people'' words!" She then asked Mitchell what he had done. "I took a ride on a choo-choo." "No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. You must remember to use ''big people'' words," she said. She then asked little Alex what he had done. "I read a book," he replied. "That''s wonderful!" the teacher said. "What book did you read?" Alex thought very hard about it, then puffed out his chest with great pride and said, "Winnie the SHIT!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MOM! at school they tell me i''m too distracted! kid, i''m the neighbour, your house is across the street.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back at school, I had a weird geometry teacher. He had warts all over his nose, and they had to remove a bit of his face due to an accident. You could say he had an... Irregular sir face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Karl Marx and Donald Trump? Trump only advocates the seizing of a *woman''s* means of production', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t find my k+(1/4a) I guess I''ve lost my focus...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to rob a bank using jello cast in the shape of a gun The police charged me with carrying a congealed weapon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people worry drinking in the shower is a sign of alcoholism I just worry about keeping the water out of my beer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage is like blackjack Marriage is like blackjack. You can either hit or stay, but you can''t do both', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad wanted to take me out for the first drink on my 21st birthday. We arrive at the local Elks Club, sit next to a few of his friends and he orders us a round. After taking a swig of that first beer he proclaims " boys there''s nothing better than cold beer and tight pussy!" To which they all agree. He then turns, points at me and says " Then Fat Head here came along and ruined one of those for me!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Obama was the Antichrist & Trump is a facist dictator Either America has grown more tolerant or liberals don''t believe in the Antichrist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best secret intelligence service? MI6 have strong Bonds but the CIA Trumps all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two firefighters Two firefighters are butt fucking in a smoke filled room. The chief walks in and yells,"what the fuck is going on in here?" The one firefighter says," he was suffering from smoke inhalation." So the fire chief asks," why didn''t you try mouth to mouth?" The firefighter says," how the hell do you think this got started!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get hanging from banana trees? Long arms', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A zebra dies and goes to heaven The zebra meets God and asks him the one true question that he''s been wondering his whole life. "God, am I a white zebra with black stripes, or a black zebra with white stripes?" God responds, "You are who you are." It was then that the zebra knew he was white with black stripes. If he was black with white stripes, God would have told him, "You is who you is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump''s releasing a hip-hop song this year Going Back To Calais', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a penis and a vagina? [NSFW] I''d say there''s quite a vas deferens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Frenchman put snails in his gas tank? To make escargot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would love to be a mirror cleaner. I can see myself making a living that way...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My last relationship was like Forrest Gump She was a whore and I was retarded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Secret Service arrest the recently immigrated masseuse? They said Melania told the masseuse after he was done to give the President a fist bump, not to fist Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Harper Lee''s favourite spirit to drink when she went claypigeon shooting? Tequila Mockingbird', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man frantically walks into the doctor''s office... ...and begins to shout, "I''m a teepee! I''m a wigwam! I''m a teepee! I''m a wigwam!" "Calm down, calm down!" The doctor says. "You''re two tents!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Walking home after a girls'' night out, two women pass a graveyard and stop to pee... The first woman has nothing to wipe with, so she uses her underwear and tosses it. Her friend, however, finds a ribbon on a wreath, so she uses that. The next day, the first woman''s husband phones the second woman''s husband, furious: "My wife came home last night without her panties!" "That''s nothing," says the other. "Mine came back with a card stuck between her butt cheeks that said, ''From all of us at the fire station, we''ll never forget you.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the pirate sell his corn for on the side of the street? Buck an ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s a medical breakthrough! An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut out a man''s liver put it into another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we took a part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we took half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. About a week ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him our President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sad marijuana pipe? Miserabowl!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Eat What? knock knock who''s there? I eat yerp I eat yerp who That''s disgusting, please stop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you guys hear about Mike Pence? His favorite supreme Court case is Nix v. Hadden involving the federal classification of the tomato. It''s cause he loves when the government turns fruits into vegetables.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the two most important holes in a womans body? No!! Not them you dirty bastards!!!! Its her nostrils...they allow her to breathe while she''s sucking your dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I fingered my girlfriend during her period Her parents caught me red handed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a near death experience and a booty call? One is ducking fate and the other is a...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the broom late? It overswept!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the favorite food of infinity. Cocaine. Cos it''s a high number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the rebellious Hebrew child? He went out and got stoned with his mates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man takes a stool sample to the hospital Everyone is looking at him with disgust as he asks for the optical department. "Sir the laboratory is to the right" "I don''t need to go to the laboratory" He hops on the elevator and yet again is told the laboratory is to the right "I don''t need to go to the laboratory! I need the optical department" Finally he gets there and the doctor looks at the sample and says "Sir this isn''t the laboratory" The blind man out of rage then tells him "I don''t need the godamn laboratory! I need to go to the optical department because every time I do this my eyes get watery!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a rumor going around that someone in my group of friends is gay... I hope it''s Josh, he''s pretty cute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Been reading a fascinating memoir about Latino street culture. It''s a collection of ess.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m thinking about moving to Switzerland... For a couple of reasons, but their flag is a big plus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Pitbulls favorite sports icon? Dale! Earnhardt Jr.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fake TV bought on craigslist? A video-con.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do when a chemist dies? You barium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a cat like a joke? If you dissect it, it dies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of table is good for your health? A vegetable! This joke was made by adorable 8-year-old niece! It wasn''t. It was made by a 27 year old. Me. It was made by me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Princess Leia like her showers? Lukewarm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day I had food poisoning And I had diarrhea for a whole week. I shit you not', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I haven''t lost my virginity yet... Because i never lose', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would the name be of a magician duo containing a chicken and a deaf woman? Hen and Keller.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Another college girl with a very active sex life... She especially loved hooking up with prisoners and professional ice hockey players. Those were kind of her fetishes, and she didn''t know why. She didn''t really like to use condoms, though, which was very dumb of her, and she knew that, but she thought it felt so much better without one. Also, she was on birth control. Only, one day, her period didn''t come as expected. She thought it was probably nothing, but she was suspicious nonetheless. She went to the store and bought a pregnancy test, and, lo and behold, she was indeed pregnant. Well, shit. Due to her active sex life and having slept with all those pro players and prison boys, she didn''t really know, which one of them had gotten her pregnant. She thought about what she was to do. Should she keep the baby? How could she find the father? And then it hit her. She had to make a list of all the pros and cons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister bet me a hundred dollars I couldnt build a car out of spaghetti. You should''ve seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Guys in a Jail cell There''s two guys in a cell and the one the guys says to the other : Man 1 : since we in here fo life, me and you gonna get married. But I''m nice... I''ll let you decide if you wanna be the husband or the wife . Man 2: "The husband of course" Man 1: "Then why don''t you come here and suck your wife''s dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That day in lab I nearly made a science joke ...but my friend said Na.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new tax law Trump has issued? I don''t know much about it but it seems tariff-eyeing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by accidentally giving my girlfriend my sandwich that had extra cheese when she''s lactose intolerant Whoops, wrong sub.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the number 0 say to the number 8? "Nice belt."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel very akward when I watch dance instruction videos. Always staring at the feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does the king keep his armies? In his sleevies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend broke up with me cause I stole her wheelchair But I knew she''d come crawling back to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat Aliens thought she was our Dyson Sphere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say I''m superficial ...but that''s just on the surface.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do Christians go after throwing up? Heave''in', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a homeless horse? Unstable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk guy looks at a wanted poster... And thinks ''why would they let him go after clicking the pic''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Backstage at Project Runway, Tim walked past me holding some coffee. I said, "Hey, Gunn, where you going with that joe in your hand?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s still hard to take Trump seriously. For some reason I get the feeling he''s just Putin us on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did a banana go to the doctor? because he wasnt.. peeling well hahahah (ill find the door)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor''s Discussion An Israeli doctor says : " In Israel , medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man ''s liver put them on another man , and in 6 weeks , he is looking for work . " The German doctor says : " That ''s nothing , in Germany we take part of a brain , put it in another man , and in 4 weeks he is looking for work . " The Indian doctor says : " Gentlemen , we take half a heart from a man , put it in another ''s chest , and in 2 weeks he is looking for work . " The American doctor laughs : " You all are behind us . Two days ago , we took a man with no brains , no heart , and no liver and made him President.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to date a girl that only had one leg... Her name was Ilene and she worked at IHOP', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is a Trump supporter who ran out of breakfast bread. She lacks toast and tolerance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the hair on a cows lip? A Moo-stache. > The perks of having too much free time in a call center.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One saggy boob said to the other saggy boob... "We need to pick ourselves up otherwise everyone will think we''re nuts"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend often accuses me of telling sexist, condescending jokes that target women. I''ve explained to her those jokes are actually ironic jabs at the current state of post-modern feminism, designed to highlight societal double standards across genders. So she needn''t worry her pretty little head about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that mentally disabled kid who shoved a burger up his ass? I think he''s got assburger syndrome.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a long day of eroding civil rights, Donald can''t wait to get home and remove Melania''s panties. She really gets upset when he stretches them out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You get the most from a Women''s Studies degree when you... ...spend a semester studying abroad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Snoop''s favorite contraction? We''d', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A prostitute asks her doctor if he could drill another hole next to her ass. The surprised doctor asks why...? "Business is going well, I want to open another branch" she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I keep wanting to try Kraftig... But the last time Germans talked about purity my ancestors had to flee the continent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike rushed into a math class while in full session Mike rushed into a math class while in full session. The teacher was aghast: - Why are you so late Mike? Mike tried to calm down: - Gunmen in ski masks attacked me. The teacher reached out to him: - Oh My God! Are you hurt? Mike: - No, but they managed to grab my homework.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do French people do on Valentine''s Day? They d''clair their love to each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Man Lost his Wife In Tsunami A Man Lost his Wife In Tsunami One Drunk-Night .. while standing on the Seashore, waves touching on his feets . He shouted to the Sea: ''No matter how many times your Waves Touch my Feet . . . I''ll Never take her back .. !! Its your mistake.. Deal With It Now....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('a priest, rabbi and, caliphate walk into a bar they woke up in the hospital with a concussion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doors of my house are open for you always. Get out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Difference between twins I''ve fucked a set of twins. People have asked me how hard it was to tell them apart, but it was actually quite easy. You see, Caroline was a redhead with an amazing pair of tits, And frank had a cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer''s Siamese twin brother was a criminal... He was con fused.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teach a man to fish, and he''ll be able to eat for a lifetime. Teach a Nigerian to phish, and he''ll become a prince.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stop posting Chuck Norris jokes on the Internet. Chuck Norris will delete the internet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am a loyal man. When I go out shopping with my mom, I don''t look at other moms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rumor has it there''s a basketball court on the roof of the Supreme Court building. It''s the highest court in the land.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between me and trash? Nobody takes me out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t know what to get my mother for Christmas I turned to my colleagues and asked what I should get for her when my boss says "Get her some slippers and a dildo, if she doesn''t like the slippers she can go and fuck herself"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the doctors about my hearing.. I went to the doctors about my hearing and the doctors asked me "Can you describe the symptoms?" I said "Yeah, Homer''s fat and Marge has blue hair"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man walks into a restaurant and asks the waiter "what''s the special today?" Waiter replies "Oasis soup" - Man: "why is it called Oasis soup?" Waiter replies "cos you get a *roll with it*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I will find you.. You have my Word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants. "Well," he said, "I''ve been seeing this girl for a while and she''s really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight''s "the" night. We''re having dinner with her parents, and then we''re going out. And I''ve got a feeling I''m gonna get lucky after that." "Once she''s had me, she''ll want me all the time, so you''d better give me the 12 pack." The young man makes his purchase and leaves. Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessing and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl leans over to him and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious person." The boy leans over to her and whispers, "You never told me that your father is a pharmacist."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The weirdest thing I''ve heard during sex is "Cum inside me." I got pretty freaked out. Why? Hands don''t talk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a round table meeting of a bunch of chronic masturbators? A circumference BADUMTSS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes me a good scottish man? **Well if i were a bad scottish man,i wouldn''t have been discussing this with ya now would i?**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what do you get when you cross a bison with a duck? buffalo bill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do dogs go when they lose their tail? To the retail store', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you can an acoholic dwarf? Just a little drunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got arrested the other day after police found me covering a boy with melted sugar I was charged with child molassation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Noticing a woman sitting alone at a table in a bar... .. a man goes over to chat with her. After talking to her for a while he makes his move. "Stop!" says the woman as the man tries to kiss her. "I''m sorry but I''m keeping myself pure until I meet the man I truly love." "Wow", says the man, "that must be difficult." "It''s not too bad", replied the woman. "My husband''s quite upset though."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my teacher to tell a joke He said "Want me to announce your grades?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Holmes and Watson were investigating a murder at an archaeological dig-site Holmes picks up several of the rocks and pebbles surrounding the murder victim. After a while, Holmes turns to his companion and says "I''ve cracked the case. The suspect was clearly murdered with a blow to the head by a rock, which then crumbled and scattered into pieces." "How on Earth can you tell?" exclaims Watson. "It''s sedimentary, my dear Watson."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not addicted to drinking brake fluid.... I can stop any time I want.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two silk worms are in a wrestling match It ended in a tie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Black History Month A kid in my class asked why we had a Black History Month and not a White History Month. I told him we had eleven.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They said "Find something you love to do and you will never work a day in your life" They are darn right, that field isn''t hiring!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Donald Trump wear such a long tie? It''s his leash.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandfather had a heart of a lion... and also a lifetime ban from the zoo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hitler was caught jacking off by a dead jew. Hitler: Oh no, I did Nazi you there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to have a pet leech. It was attached to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can''t blame Monica Lewinsky for getting her dress dirty... I''m sure she just didn''t see it coming...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('the ghostly act of not respecting your equals disapeer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have one advice to the people of /r/NoFap Go fuck yourself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A World Wide Survey.... A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The survey was a huge failure. In Africa they didn''t know what "food" meant. In Eastern Europe they didn''t know what "honest" meant. In Western Europe they didn''t know what "shortage" meant. In China they didn''t know what "opinion" meant. In the Middle East they didn''t know what "solution" meant. In South America they didn''t know what "please" meant. And in the USA they didn''t know what "the rest of the world" meant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would Reddit do for a Klondike bar? OP''s mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I need to stop making autism jokes But the repetition is just too soothing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the girl that was dating an Eskimo? She broke it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Moses doesn''t mind period sex. He''s used to being in the red sea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 original jokes Here''s 2 (bad) jokes I made up a few years ago. With all the reposts on here some new ones might be nice even if they are bad! 1. What do you call a long snake-like poo? A Poothon 2. A family of poothons were floating down a river. The son poothon asks his mother "dad told me that we''re just a by-product of the human digestive system, is that true?" The mother replies "don''t listen to him, he''s just talking shit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday I killed a pair of pigeons with an unmanned flying device. You could say I killed two birds with one drone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Gregor Mendel never finished any of his work? That''s right! No punnett ended', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the year of good eyesight? The Year 2020', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are seagulls called seagulls? Because, if they flew over the bay, they would be called bagels.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of joke is the best joke? A Communist joke, because everyone gets it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dual stand up act on their periods? comoody', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad what does it feel like having an awesome son? Me: Dad what does it feel like having an awesome son? Dad: I dont know ask your grandpa Edit: Can''t believe i got 1000 upvotes , Thanks Dad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the fastest food in the world? Scone', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad always told me he never made the same mistake twice Must be why I''m an only child Edit: First time on front page thanks guys!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest had a speaking parrot One night when the priest went on vacation a burglar broke into his house. Trying to be as sneaky as possible he didn''t used his flashlight. Suddenly he heard a voice say:" Jesus sees you!" He quickly turned on his flashlight and looked around. When he saw the parrot the parrot again said:" Jesus sees you!" The burglar asked the parrot:" Who are you little Buddy?" The parrot answered:" I''m Josef." The burglar laughed:" What idiot names his parrot Josef?" The parrot answered:" The same Idiot who named his pitbull Jesus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The CIA, GIGN and KGB...... are all trying to prove they are the best at catching criminals. The Secretary General of the UN decides to set them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest, and each of them has to catch it. The CIA people go in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations, they conclude that the rabbit does not exist. The GIGN goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and make no apologies: the rabbit had it coming. The KGB goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: Okay! Okay! Im a rabbit! Im a rabbit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t the number 288 ever be said in public? Because it''s too gross', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like going for a jog at night The fear of getting murdered really helps my stamina.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Officer: Soldier, do you have change for a dollar? Soldier: Sure, buddy. Officer: That''s no way to address an officer! Now let''s try it again. Do you have change for a dollar? Soldier: No, SIR!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say you cant get a decent job without education. But look at Albert Einstein he was a drop-out and still ended up being the first man on the moon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Know why Mexico doesn''t have a good Olympic team? Anybody that can run, jump, or swim is already in the U.S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters were out in the woods Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He''s not breathing and his eyes are glazed, so his friend calls 911. "My friend is dead! What should I do?" The operator replies, "Calm down, sir. I can help. First make sure that he''s dead." There''s a silence, then a loud bang. Back on the phone, the guy says, "Ok, now what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a co-pilot and a duck? The duck can fly. EDIT: this is a pilot joke - I obviously know that co-pilots can fly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You must be calcium You make my bone hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Pizzas & parents have in common? If they''re black, you have nothing to eat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Men walk into a bar... The third one ducked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a disagreeable Russian Sasquatch? A Nyeti.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Caught my wife receiving oral sex from our refrigerator again. I''ll never buy another Kelvinator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Despair. What a Jamaican gets when he''s bowling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a colour doing a chemistry degree? Cyantific.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sherlock and Watson were walking through an orchard... As they walk Watson keeps asking Sherlock to identify the trees they are seeing. After some time they approach a clearing and in the centre is a lone tree. Watson asks "Sherlock what is that tree with yellow skinned fruit?" Sherlock smiles and replies "That''s a lemon tree, my dear Watson"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A diplomat walks into a bar... A diplomat walks into a bar, orders a beer and sits next to another patron. They get to talking and the topic of careers comes up. "I''m a government official" says the diplomat. "I travel the world, negotiating trade deals and brokering peace agreements. It''s an amazing job." "Shit" says the other patron, "I''m just an electrician, I''m nowhere near that important!" "Not at all" the diplomat replied. "We both must stay informed on the same matters. You sound like you''re just as plugged in to current affairs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got frostbite and had part of my foot amputated. Then my girlfriend left me. She was lack-toes intolerant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can someone get me a new calendar? Mayan ended', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An interview with the best racer in the world Reporter: So, how do you do it? How do you keep winning? Racer: Winning? Reporter: Yeah, you have been undefeated since day one. Racer: I''ve invented a new way of winning a race, it''s about coming through the finish line last. So far everyone else have been better at it than me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher reminds her class for tomorrow''s exam A teacher reminds her class of the yearly test tomorrow. "And remember class, there is no excuse for missing the test tomorrow, not a hurricane, not a funeral, not a nuclear attack, nothing!" Little Johnny in the corner then pipes up and says "What would happen if I came into class suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion? The whole class bursts into laughter. The teacher walks up to Johnny and smiles and says "I''d guess you''d have to write the test left-handed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lion, a witch, and a Wardrobe apparate into a bar The bartender calls out, "Hey, no secret identities in this bar!" So the lion transforms into a bright light, the witch dons a pantsuit, and a man steps out of the closet. The bartender is aghast, almost on the verge of tears. "Oh my lord. I never thought I''d meet God, Hillary Clinton, and Drake in the same day!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How often do guinea pigs have sex? Once a wheek wheek wheek wheek!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does the man with fake hair never carry around his wallet? Because he never expects to toupee anything', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate gravity... It''s always putting me down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lauren was lying in bed One night when she felt her husband''s hand caressing her neck in a way she hadn''t experienced in quite a while. Then it slid down her side, stopping at her knee, which was as far as her husband could reach. Then he moved close and did the same on her other side before abruptly stopping and moving away. Delighted by this unexpected attention, Lauren whispered, "Honey, that was wonderful. Why did you stop?" He answered, ''''I found the remote."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the last thing to cross Paul Walker''s mind? The windshield', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a church that had a bell that no one could ring There was a church that had a bell that no one could ring. One day, a boy came and asked the priest if he could try. He went up into the tower and ran straight into the bell face-first. The bell tolled loud and clear. The priest gave him the job. One Sunday, the boy ran straight toward the bell with his face and missed, so he fell off the tower and died. "Congregation," the priest said before the assembled masses. "Does anybody know this boy''s name? I don''t know him, but his face rings a bell."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does an angry Mexican season his food? ...With a pinche salt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pair of jumper cables walk into a bar The bartender says "I''ll serve you, but you better not start anything"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cant believe how much my girlfriend is crying about her new haircut Its much worse for me, Im the one whos gonna have to find a new girlfriend now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between oranges and babies? I don''t fuck the oranges after I skin them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blind man cross the street ? At least he tried ......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Chinese person with a video camera? Phil Ming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 flies on a terd 1 fly farts and the other says ''do you mind I''m eating''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before leaving, my mother asked me, "How long will you be travelling through Scandanavia?" I replied, "Until I''m Finnished."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gay dating is hard when you only like pessimists. I''m not interested in positive men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what do you call gangster spaghetti spaghetto', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a magic dog? A labracadabrador', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ''''I''m looking for the man who shot my paw.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Google maps hold down a solid relationship Because it''s always looking for the quickest possible route', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a pizza delivery driver and a gynecologist have in common? They both have to smell it but neither of them gets to eat it. :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with no hands walks into a palm reader''s business The palm reader looks at him and says, "well, I''m stumped."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a white bear that can''t push? A polar bear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the man ask the Jamaican Chef? "What Jamaican?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar for every time a woman didn''t show interest in me They''d probably eventually show interest in me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elephants were watching a naked man... One elephant turned and asked the other, "How the hell does he eat with that thing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump said "I am going to drain the swamp and take on the establishment"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A football coach of an all Redneck team walked into the locker room before a game,... looked over to his star player and said, "I''m not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we need you in there. So what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play." The player agreed, and the coach looked into his eyes intently and asks, "Okay, now concentrate... what is two plus two?" The player thought for a moment and then he answered, "Four?" "Four?!?" the coach exclaimed, excited that he got it right. At that, all the other players on the team began screaming, "Come on coach, give him another chance!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old guy buys a new sports car..... And right after he leaves the salesroom, he floors the gas pedal making him zip in the road. He notices that a police car, with it''s siren blaring so he really puts the pedal to the max. While in hot pursuit, he realizes that he''s too old for this. So he pulls over, waiting for the cop to catch up to him. The cop finally approaches him, and tells him "Sir, my shift ends in 10 minutes. It''s C Christmas. If you can give me a good reason that you did this, i''ll let you go." The man explained that his wife, many years ago she ran off for a policeman. i thought you were bringing her back. "Have a good day sir" Said the cop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My favourite job has always been giving stupid people advice. Hello! You clicked! What do you want to know?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s Going to Pay For the Wall? Mexico Mexic Mexi Mex Me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Went for a walk with the missus last night... There''s a beautiful spot on top of the hill not so far from here, on the way whilst walking down a quiet path she turned to me and said, "Give it to me, give it to me, I''m wet". I stopped for a second and looked around, and then it dawned upon me "No fuck off, it''s my umbrella".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito will stop sucking after you slap it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If two people having sex is called a twosome..... Then now i know why they call you handsome ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man looking for his wife... The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, You know, Ive lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes? Why? Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Trump''s choice for Supreme Court Justice is strongly opposed to euthanasia. I wonder what he''s got against kids in the Orient?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So this guy works at a pickle factory... Every day, he comes home after work and tells his wife about his day. One day, he comes home and tells her he has a very dark fantasy. He says, "I want to put my dick in the pickle slicer." His wife is shocked, and encourages him not to do it, but the next day the man comes home with a sick grin on his face. His wife says, "Please tell me you didn''t do it!" The man keeps grinning. His wife takes off his pants to assess the damage, but everything is as it should be. The wife is confused. The man keeps grinning. He says, "I did it, I put my dick in the pickle slicer, and she wants to do it again this weekend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should you put on the tomb stone of a mathematician? He didn''t count on this...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went into a bar and sat infront of a bowl of pretzels... "You have some very nice clothes" said the bowl of pretzels. The man thinking he was hallucinating, ignored the bowl and called the waiter and ordered a margarita. "Nice choice good sir" said the bowl of pretzels. The man once again thinking he was hallucinating ignored the bowl of pretzels. On recieving his drink he gave the waiter a dollar as thanks. "You are quite generous my good sir" said the bowl of pretzels. The man startled called the waiter, "I thought I was hallucinating, but that bowl of pretzels infringement of me is complimenting me" said the man to the waiter. The waiter nodded before saying, "Don''t worry sir, the bowl of pretzels are complimentary!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A handful of foreign-exchange students are in the classroom ... and they were asked their opinion on food scarcity in other countries. The discussion was a complete disaster. The Somali kids didn''t know the English word "food", the British kids didn''t know what "scarcity" meant, the American kids didn''t know what "other countries" were, and the Chinese students asked what "their opinion" should be. Source: Not mine, I just hadn''t seen this one on /r/jokes at least in a while. Can haz less-stale repost?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad taste Did you hear Donald Trump is putting a ban on telecommunications from the middle east! It''s called the Teleban.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone asked what my favorite band was... if I''m being subjective, I''d say The Who. if I''m being objective, I''d say The Whom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sally can''t sell seashells down by the seashore anymore... She was busted for conch-traband.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Michael J. Fox is getting his own cooking show... The show is called, "Shake and Bake".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Batman when he skips out on church? Christian Bale', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On His Deathbed On his deathbed, a lifelong Republican supporter suddenly announced that he was switching to the Democrats. I cant believe youre doing this. said his friend. For your entire life youre been a staunch Republican. Why would you want to become a Democrat now? Because Id rather it was one of them that dies than one of us.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a man and a government bond? The bond matures!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was about to give an awareness speech on STD''s.. A man was about to give an awareness speech on STD''s (sexually transmitted diseases) when he realized that there were some kids in the audience so he had to speak metaphorically. He started by saying, "everyone should only drink from their wells"... and continued until the end of the speech when an old man asked the question, "what if I don''have a well?". Before the speaker could answer, the old man''s grandson said, "you can drink from your own tap grandpa".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor told me I need fewer trans fats in my life... Looks like it''s time to delete Tumblr.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black man goes inside a bus full of Koreans Everybody is talking and the only word he can make out is the word ''nigga''. The black man looks around and sees that he''s the only black person on the bus. He starts to get visibly upset and then a passenger who happened to speak english and could see why he was upset spoke up. "Excuse me, I see you are upset but there is no reason to be. Because you see, in Korean, the word ''nigga'' means ''you''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New president of a country is handed 3 envelopes by the previous leader. President of a country is handed 3 numbered envelopes by the previous leader. Previous leader says "If you screw anything up, then open one of the envelopes and it will tell you what to do." Eventually, over time, the president screws some things up. Everyone gets mad at him and threatens to impeach him. So he opens the Envelope #1. It says "Blame everything on me, your predecessor." So he does that and eventually is forgiven. But then, as time goes on, the president screws up again. He doesn''t know what to do. So he opens up Envelope #2. It says "Blame everything on me again." So, in time, the people forgive him again. But then, as time goes on, the president screws things up yet a 3rd time. He doesn''t know what to do. Relieved that he still has one envelope left, he opens it up. It says "Prepare 3 envelopes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What could US Senate learn from Trump''s wives? A two-thirds'' majority decided to ditch him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you fuck 118 million Americans with one dick? Elect him president edit: 318 million, not 118', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Friend Recently has been attaching balloons to everything he sees. I mean seriously, you can''t make this stuff up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m furious! racist tech support just called me asian All I said was my drivers keep crashing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the German man who was up to no good? I heard he has a severe guten allergy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks up to his friend and says, "I''m getting sick of being single." The friend replies "well there''s a lot of sea in the fish.... and that sea is full of men."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] I''m so sad, my favorite dating site is shutting down Disney has announced they are shutting down Club Penguin. =(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sick painting? An Ill-ustration.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MOM! I''m being called gay in school. Who is calling you that son? A bunch of cute boys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a werewolf that doesn''t know he''s a werewolf? An unawarewolf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are Steve Bannon''s favorite flowers? Gin blossoms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has 8 wheels and flies? A garbage truck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop is walking down the street and notices A cop is walking down the street and notices a young blonde woman down on her knees under a streetlight. Can I help you? he asked. The blonde woman replied, I dropped my diamond ring and Im looking for it. The cop asked, Did you drop it right here? No, responded the blonde, I dropped it about a block away, but the lights better here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my apples how I like my clown hookers: Red, yellow, green and devoid of worms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up as an altar boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I beat Anorexia today People keep coming up with weirder names for their children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad kids This lady has two little sons that curse all the time. She can''t get them to stop using foul language. She tries time outs, extra chores and taking away their toys but nothing works. One day she finally gives up and decides that she''s just gonna smack them the next time one of them says a dirty word. So the next morning the kids come running down the stairs for breakfast and she asks the first little boy what he would like to eat. He says, "Give me some fucking eggs!" BOOM! She smacks him right across the face, then politely asks the other little boy what he would like for breakfast. He says, "I don''t want any fucking eggs!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three old men Three elderly men were at the doctor for a memory test. The doctor asked the first man, "What is three times three?" "274," was his reply. The doctor said to the second man, "It''s your turn. What is three times three?" "Tuesday", he replied. Then the doctor asked the third man, "Okay, your turn. What''s three times three"? "Nine", he answered. "That''s great!" said the doctor. "How did you get that answer? "Easy," said the third man. "I subtracted 274 from Tuesday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you spell it Palindrome or Palendrome? Cause I''ve heard it both ways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George Bush and his competitor got into a fist fight... I got to say, it was Al Gore...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What hangs at a mans thigh... What hangs at a mans thigh, and wants to poke a hole, that it''s poked many times before? A key', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a little boy in church. He had to go to the bathroom so he told his mother, "Mommy, I have to piss." The mother said, "Son don''t say piss in church. Next time you have to piss, say, ''whisper'' because it is more polite." The next Sunday, the litle boy was sitting by his father this time, and once again, he had to go to the bathroom. He told his father, "Daddy I have to whisper." The father said, "OK. Here, whisper in my ear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My landscaper is also a paramedic He told me he makes more money mowing my lawn than he would finding me on my lawn having a heart attack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most controversial topic in the pirate world? Aarghbortion', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did two oceans say to each other? Nothing, they just waved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife hates it when I''m on the toilet She says it brings out the worst in me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th Grade. Which one is the sexiest? The blonde, because she''s the only one who''s 18.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife is yelling at her husband. "Get out of the house! I hate you, I want a divorce! Get out!" As he walks out the door she screams: "I hope you die a slow and painful death!" The guy says: "So hang on a minute, now you want me to stay?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Reddit and elections in third world countries have in common? They both have a reasonable voting cutoff of six months', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Presidential politics is a lot like comedy. In the early days youre going to bomb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call A anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call something that has a small hole, is tasty, and covered in my cum? A glazed donut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think that move is going to work, you''ve got another thing coming. And it won''t be me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('America has a bad case of priapism... An elect dick that lasts for at least four years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL: Many medieval surnames like Fletcher or Cooper refer to the patriarch''s traditional occupation. I guess I won''t be marrying Mr. Dickinson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were the twin towers sad? Because they ordered pepperoni pizza and got plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex is like homework I only do it when my teacher forces me to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What to do you call someone that doesn''t eat meat OR vegetables? Dead', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what Disney song is really deep? Under The Sea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: *Playing Ouija board* Me: What''s your name? Ouija Board: I H A V E A B O Y F R I E N D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Co-Op is good for your resume. Sure it might be hard to coop with the workload, but instead of starting a job, you''ll be resuming one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Violets ate blue New Yorkers are polite So fuck you too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a documentary on erections... It tackled some really hard subjects.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy shoots a random man on the street. Cop: "Did you kill this man?" Guy: "No, a bullet killed him. Bullets are made of lead, which comes from the ground. The ground is part of nature. He died of natural causes. Case closed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do foxes breathe? Foxygen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two wrongs don''t make a right... ...just look at your parents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Mel Gibson walk into a bar at 9am? He overslept.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Damn my wife is disgusting. I went downstairs to piss in the sink, and it was full of dishes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just got the lead in a silent film Im absolutely speechless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what we think is funny... When I look into the mirror and we both laugh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the last thing Gable Tostee''s Tinder date said to him before walking on his apartment balcony? Cash me ousside, howbow dah?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had sex while camping? It''s fucking intense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone who sexually assaults avocados? A Guacamolester Sorry for the shitty taco tuesday joke......not really.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 Drunk guys entered a taxi. 3 drunk guys entered a taxi. The taxi driver knew that they were drunk so he started the engine & turned it off again. Then said, "We have reached your destination". The 1st guy gave him money & the 2nd guy said "Thank you". The 3rd guy slapped the driver. The driver was shocked thinking the 3rd drunk knew what he did. But then he asked "What was that for?". The 3rd guy replied, "Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the best member of the communist version of the Beatles? John Lenin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a sance and a laxative have in common? They''re both used to make things come forth!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just read Trump''s book "The Art of the Deal" It had four Chapter 11''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you put a contagion in Nevada? Las Plague-as', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whoever invented the knock knock joke should receive a no-bell prize', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So an emo teenager went to grocery store. He went up to the cashier and said, pointing to his scarred arm "Hey, can you scan this?" The cashier then scans the arm, only to say, "I''m sorry sir, but this item is worthless"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was born handsome, charming witty and wise I''m also a compulsive liar, but I think it evens out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Possession is nine-tenths of the law The maxim of daemon lawyers everywhere', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bacterial assassin? Tumerculosis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much is trump''s life insurance worth? One Pence', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Chuck Norris flush the toilet? He doesn''t. He scares the shit out of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump doesn''t seem to have a problem... ...fucking immigrants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where are the most waffles dropped on the beach? San Diego.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Violence is never the answer Violence is the question The answer is yes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a really successful sex change. I''m having more sex than I did last year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my underwear Drenched in blood and feces.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was at Target yesterday... I was at Target yesterday, and I saw this little girl who wanted to buy Halo 5. An old lady came up to her and said "Video games are for boys, buy something else." The girl, noticing that the lady had a box of cereal in her cart, said "Oh yeah? and trix are for kids!", then proceeded to grab the cereal out of her cart and run away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Don''t Know Shit A guy was seated next to a 10-year-old girl on an airplane. Being bored, he turned to the girl and said, "Let''s talk. I''ve heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger." The girl, who was reading a book, closed it slowly and said to the guy, "What would you like to talk about?" "Oh, I don''t know," said the guy. "How about nuclear power?" "OK," she said. "That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all eat the same stuff... grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?" The guy thought about it and said, "Hmmm, I have no idea." To which the girl replied, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don''t know shit?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does my first car and anal have in common? I didn''t want it, but my dad gave it to me anyways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A person goes to r/Jokes And finds nothing but original content', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was gunna make a joke but then I took an arrow to the knee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An 80s singer caught himself on fire, what does he do? Stop, Drop, and Rick-Roll', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What furniture store did the murderer shop at? I KEA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bush, Obama, and Trump go on a hunting trip. Their hunting guide instructs them to find and follow tracks and they should be able to find their quarry. Bush follows some tracks and gets a bear. Obama follows some tracks and gets a deer. Trump follows some tracks and gets hit by a train.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can a Toyota stretch? No, but a Mercedes-Benz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Me: Knock knock! Reddit-user: Who''s there? Me: To. Reddit-user: To who? Me: To whom*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between obsequious behaviour towards someone important in order to gain advantage and John Wayne Gacy wearing a top hat and monocle? One is sycophancy and the other is a fancy sicko. (As far as I''m aware this is an original joke that I created and am quite pleased with)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is that lobster smart enough to get out of the saucepan to turn off the heat! Trudeau is the lobster that reaches out for the seasoning!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Mexican take a Xanax? For Hispanic attacks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Having a religion is like having a penis It''s okay to have one, but just don''t go around shoving it down people''s throats.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish people would stop saying the husbands of the women who marched didn''t get a sandwich that day. Have you seen those women? No way any of them have a husband.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does China like Trump so much? They built a great wall hundreds of years ago and they still don''t have any Mexicans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Canadian shoe? A boot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to get welfare for her and her 9 children A woman goes to get welfare for her and her 9 children. When she gets to the counter the clerk asks for all her children''s names; to which she promptly replies "Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, and Joe." The clerk is confused, so he asks, "Well if you want to tell them to go to bed what do you say?" She replies, "Joe go to bed." He asks, "If you want them to eat their dinner what do you say?" She replies, "Joe eat your dinner." Finally he asks, "Well if you want to call them individually what do you say?!" She simply says, "I just call them by their last names!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always borrow money from pessimists. They won''t expect you to pay them back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At my high school if idiots could fly... it would be a fucking airport.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get an grammer nazi''s attention? That. That is how.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college girl once had a very active sex life... She especially loved hooking up with frat boys and men who had been sentenced to prison. Those were kind of her fetishes, and she didn''t know why. She didn''t really like to use condoms, though, which was very dumb of her, and she knew that, but she thought it felt so much better without one. Also, she was on birth control. Only, one day, her period didn''t come as expected. She thought it was probably nothing, but she was suspicious nonetheless. She went to the store and bought a pregnancy test, and, lo and behold, she was indeed pregnant. Well, shit. Due to her active sex life and having slept with all those prisoners and frat boys, she didn''t really know, which one of them had gotten her pregnant. She thought about what she was to do. Should she keep the baby? How could she find the father? And then it hit her. She had to make a list of all the bros and cons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the alien say after anally probing the earthling? I come in peace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I play triangle in a reggae band I just stand at the back and ting', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Doctor Who say to his wife? It''s bigger when it''s inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do the world''s most misleading people go to commit suicide? Sahr Chasm', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Later tonight I might have consensual sex with my wife. ..if she''s up for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ain''t is like a Swiss Army knife It''s got a lot of uses but you can''t use it in school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cucumber get embarrassed? Because it saw the salad dressing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was really something else, man! said the cadet policeman to his partner... "When I was off duty Saturday night, I went to this big party, see, and pretty soon I noticed this fabulous little bird giving me the eye. Then she asked me to take her home. And just as soon as we were in the car, she unzipped me and went right down on the old fella - and I still didn''t even know her name." "So what did you do?" asked the other cop. "Well, I figured this was one situation where I''d shoot first and ask questions afterward."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump discovered the lost spice girl... Stupid Spice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People told me getting my girlfriend a refridgerator for her birthday present was a bad idea. But her face lit up when she opened it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never realized how artistic horses used to be Today someone told me there used to be horse drawn carriages everywhere...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Diets are like relationships... They get easier if you allow yourself a cheat day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between men and women? Boobs Ba dum tits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do bulemics like Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because it comes with a bucket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone with no body or nose? Nobody knows', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Burger Lady (Original) A man walks up to a burger stall where he is served by an extremely sad looking lady. Ill have a double cheeseburger please, says the man before adding and cheer up, it might never happen. You''re the fifth person who has told me to cheer up today, replies the lady. Im sick of it! Who the hell are you to tell me to smile while Im making your food? Im really sorry he replies. I can see now that it was a very insensitive thing to say. I have no right at all to tell you that you have to enjoy your job, get deep satisfaction from flipping burgers, or take pleasure in dishing out this greasy crap. Surprised by his honest admission, the burger lady says Well, thanks for saying so. Apology accepted. Now how would you like your burger cooked? With relish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She flew into a Rage and punched me in the jaw!! "I THOUGHT YOU WERE TAKING ME TO CLNIQUE!! Oh honey no. I said I was taking you to a clinic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I went to see the doctor the other day And told him that I have a poop problem. Doctor: Okay now tell me what''s going on. Me: Everyday I poop at 8:00 in the morning Doctor: Okay so what''s the problem Me: I wake up at 9.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s similar between people who comment "have an upvote!" and extreme feminists? Nobody cares about either', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with no carnal desires walks into a Freudian psychoanalyst''s office The psychoanalyst stops him and says, "hey, buddy, I''m gonna need to see some id."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Buzzfeed Top 10 least conductive items! Number 6 won''t shock you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a single black mother? A black widow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did anyone hear what happened to the paraplegic at the disco? He got kicked out for arsing around', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eating pasta by myself.. makes me cannelloni.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A soldier ran up to his Sergeant It was during the middle of the Korean war. Bullets and bombs were everywhere... A soldier ran up to his Sergeant and said "Serg Serg! I have to take a wicked shit!" The Sergeant replied "Private you have ten minutes, we need you on the front line, hurry up!" The private ran off and was gone an hour and came strolling back with a smirk on his face when he crossed paths with his Sergeant who said "PRIVATE JOHNSON WHERE WERE YOU!? "Well Serg, first off I took the absolute best shit of my life." "ANNNNND!??" Yelled the Sergeant. "And, on the way back I saw a girl laying there and the next thing I know we''re having the best sex of my life." "Oh? Is that right, OK private, did you get get any head? "No, she didn''t have a head".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate walks into a bar... With a ships wheel attached to the front of his pants. The bartender says "Hey captain did you know you have a wheel on your crotch?" The captain growls and says "Arg it''s driving me nuts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some financial advice A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says: "Ill give you $800 to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. A few seconds and a satisfying glance later, Bob hands her $800 and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks: "Who was that?" "It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies. "Great," the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?" Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To Mexicans: why should you stop exporting cheese to America? Because Trump is Nacho President', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The weird thing about men is that, as they get older the begin wearing their pants higher and higher. My great-grandpa got so old he had to unzip just to talk to us!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, an NAND gate is an AND gate... ... but NOT', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar.... then a table, and then a chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Annoying Orange has 5 million subscribers, but has long since reached its peak. Now he''s president of the United States.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the bear have any friends? His personality was unbearable!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that the guy who played Captain Kirk has set up a chain of clothing shops especially for older ladies. It''s called Shatner Pants', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife asked me where I wanted to be buried. Although I''m pretty sure "balls deep in your sister" wasn''t the answer she wanted to hear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old lady at the bank asked me if I could check her balance So I pushed her over', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever wonder how many puppeteers there are in the world? Probably only a handful!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandpa has the heart of a lion... which is what happens when there aren''t enough organ donors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cabbie was part of the protest #deleteuber and so he drove to JFK. When he got there no one was around. The protesters were all at the airport but he had shown up at JFK''s grave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the most sensitive part of your body when masturbating? Your ears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s an emo in my Web Development class, she''s doing a website about jewellery Her first page was /Wrists', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? Halfway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ladies and Gentlemen... Madeleine McCann! World Hide and Seek Champion 2007!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I were happy for 20 years Then we met each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the movie Constipation? It hasn''t come out yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of fruit is always complaining about their lack of freedom in society? The Cant-eloupe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Older Man Fixes Dessert for His Wife An older couple was sitting down watching TV one evening when the wife gets a hankering for some ice cream. Wife: Honey, get me a bowl of ice cream, please. The husband stands up to go get it. His wife stops him. Wife: Oh, I also wants some chocolate syrup on it. Now write it down so you don''t forget it. Husband: I got it. Ice cream with chocolate syrup on it. Wife: I also want sprinkles and a cherry. Write it down so you don''t forget. Husband: I got it. I got it. Ice cream with chocolate syrup, sprinkles, and a cherry. The husband is in the kitchen for 45 minutes before coming back with a plate of scrambled eggs and some orange juice. Wife: See! See! I told you to write it down! You forgot my bacon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar... The man is a muslim and the bar is in the U.S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I wish I was a baker. Then I would be rolling in dough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like spaghetti... They''re straight until they''re wet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes my humour grows so dark, It starts gathering cotton in africa. .. I feel awful now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Betsy DeVos passed her Senate Confirmation hearing... and I, for one, am DeVostated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with a fork sticking out of his stomach A man goes to see the doctor. He has a fork sticking out of his stomach and there''s blood everywhere. "Doctor, doctor, help me!" The doctor looks at the man, and then looks at his watch. "I''m sorry, but it''s 5pm and my work day is over." "But doctor, please do something!" The doctor thinks for a moment, then grabs the fork and sticks it in the man''s eye. "Go to the oculist -- he works until 6." *Note: I originally heard this one in Russian*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love is like a Fart If you''ve got to force it it''s probably shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d hate to grow up to be a geologist. Because I''d always be taken for granite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Come up with your own Original joke without any time to think. Rules inside As soon as you are finished reading this just start typing. No time to think. Don''t use jokes you''ve heard in the past. You can''t stop typing! lets see how bad these turn out. Ready? Go!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the man say after his Tripod fell down for the fifth time in a row? I can''t stand this anymore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump is a good Christian So then can someone explain why he wrote an executive order that literally would ban Jesus (who comes from the middle east)?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('the best girlfriend What''s the difference between my ex and the titanic? The titanic only went down on 1,000 people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tranny, Mushit and a black guy are in a burning building and I can only save one of them You kidding me? Why would I risk my life to do that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a girl with 12 nipples the other day.. Sounds funny, Dozen tit?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a lawyers least favourite PC case. An open case.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Republicans love black people! They send millions of them to a place where they get a free room, free rent and a gym membership', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a priest and a silver medalist have in common? They both came in a little behind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Jackie Chan''s favorite type of car? KIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAA!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nerd joke. Me: look at my graphics card Other person: what''s the clock speed Me: it''s so high it hertz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Hillary Clinton''s ass jealous? All the shit was coming from her mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Clown walks into a bar... Clown walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me a treehouse." Bartender says, "A treehouse, what''s in a treehouse?" Clown says, "Playboys and cigars, of course!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only difference between group sex and group therapy... is that in group therapy you hear about everyone''s problems, and in group sex you see them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my friend who is an American diplomat how life was He said he can''t complain', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After crossing which line in Siberia, can you no longer escape it? The evenk horizon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When all else fails... ...make All Else 2.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father sits down with his 10 year old son to talk to him about the birds and the bees. He says, "Son, I think it''s about time I told you about the birds and the bees. When a man and a wom..." The son cuts his dad off mid-sentence and says, "I already know about sex, dad." Feeling both outraged and relived the dad asks, "Who told you?" The son replies, "Father McKinney, after mass." "Well, how much do you know?" And the son says "We just went over the ins and outs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL there are 189 countries NOT affected by President Trumps Extreme Vetting Executive Order. I guess 7 isn''t that bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know a dog is better than a wife? Lock them both in the trunk of your car and see who is happier to see you after an hour when you let them out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday my wife told me I was a selfish lover. I was so shocked I nearly choked on my own cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From the South, but Not Southern People: You''re from the south? But you don''t have an accent. Me: I know, my parents put me in school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to a particularly strange drive thru... The menu reads Burgers - $5 Handjobs - $10 A sexy waitress says "Can I take your order?" "Are you the girl doing the handjobs?" "Why yes, I am" The man hands the waitress $10 and says "Well clean your hands, because I want two burgers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I misheard the Muslim ban as Muslim band I thought either Donald Trump is really into percussion or I''ve misunderstood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a new antidepressant on the market for lesbians. Trycoxagin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a nun pregnant? You fuck her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the doctor say to the midget waiting in the lobby? You''re going to have to be a little patient.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breitbart news is a lot like my girlfriend Fake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once I heard a man talking about a cul-de-sac. Turns out he was an Italian with an STD.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Betsy DeVos wants to eliminate trigonometry from school math curricula because it teaches our children to sin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to a recent survey, 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren''t Happy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What I hate most about this subreddit: What I hate most about this subreddit: When the first line is the title.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never tell me friction jokes... I just won''t let them slide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the bottle say to the glass after a long night? Nothing, they were both shattered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just don''t get why so many Trump supporters are into BBW? Seriously though. His supporters even love that big beautiful Jewish one in Israel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many "Suh Dude"s does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. It''s already lit fam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid had sex with his teacher So the kid just got of school and he got into the car with his mom. The mom asks, "What did you do at school today?" The kid replies, "I had sex with the teacher." The mom was furious so when they got home, she told him to go to his room and wait for his father to come home. Well the father came home from work a couple hours later and the mother told him what their son said. The dad walks up to his sons room and says, "Son, I''m proud of you. I''m going to buy you a new bike." Later that day they got the bike and the father asks, "Would you like to try it out?" The son replies, "Not now. My butt still hurts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because he''s a fungi. Why was he asked to leave the party? Because there wasn''t mushroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to date a girl with a lazy eye... but I dumped her because I could never hit the target. Like the carnival game of getting the water in the clowns mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the psychic so confident about the predictions she makes for 3 years out? Because she can see what is going to happen in 2020 crystal clear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People told me the blind people''s convention was great. I''m not really seeing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My shelf has been making weird clicking noises since I bought it it might be a Geiger counter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fat Hawaiian man recently converted to Islam Aloha Snack-bar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge was arrested after ordering a group of crows confined to an insane asylum. What for? Committing a murder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young couple are showering together A young couple are showering when the girlfriend says, "Honey I want you to do something naughty." The boyfriend agrees. He then proceeds to drop shampoo in her left eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A skeleton walks into a bar... ...he orders a beer and a mop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the cat amputee''s reaction to her successful transplant? It gave her pause', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Arab man without any goats? A virgin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Vegan goes into a Mcdonalds and says ''I''m hungry but I can''t eat anything with a face'' The manager comes over. "Sir, by the time we serve your food it hasn''t GOT a face".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a hispanics favorite arcade game? Guac-a-mole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Death Star destroy the planet? For Alderaan reasons', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Ivanka Trump and JFK airport have in common? Donald wouldn''t be happy if a muslim entered either of them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what''s the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator ? The fridge doesn''t fart when you pull your meat out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News: Coup Underway - Trump takes control of senate and declares martial law! Oh wait... That was Palpatine. False alarm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard this one shopping at a mom and pop store. Maybe NSFW Store employee: do you know what slaves and coffee have in common? Me: uhhhhhh. Store employee: They''re free! As he pointed to their complimentary coffee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the earth say to the other planets? Wow. You guys have no life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The wife and I mixed it up a bit last night... We washed the silverware BEFORE the dishes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can roast beef but you cant pee soup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sits in the forest? Winnie''s pooh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think James A. Garfield Presidency was impactful He really trained for it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between sand and menstrual fluid? It''s difficult to gargle sand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the Mobius loop? To get to the other ... errr ... ummm ... wait ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best way to eat a vegetable? Remove the wheelchair first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mountains aren''t just funny, They are hill areas', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Syrian chapel and a Turkish terrorist camp? America will let in people from the terrorist camp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two stoners getting married? A weeding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Saudi who doesn''t care about current events? Living under Iraq.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Penguin A bartender was working late at night when suddenly a man ran bursting through the door and asked the bartender. Man: "QUICK, HOW TALL IS A PENGUIN?" The bartender slightly confused, he simply said. Bartender: "about this tall" The man started to panic and said. Man: "Oh god i ran over a nun!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the chicks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the philosophical whisker say to the other? Man, we''ve really grown far from our roots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It has been said that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers. However all the league records were destroyed in a fire, so we will never know for whom the Tells bowled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man just walked into my house and demanded I feed and water him. Offer him all my hospitality and pay him for watching my TV. I told him to back after Brexit. We don''t want to do that in out country anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you stop a dog from humping your leg.. Pic him up and suck on his dick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tied some rope yesterday It was knot that interesting', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you read the menu? ''Cause all I see is me ''n u', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Soviet America... Putin elects you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After years of my mom telling me to bond with my stepdad... We finally bonded over a shared annoyance of her forcing us to do bonding activities. I guess you could call it ironic bonding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Indian man was recently hospitalised after inhaling too many spices... He spent a month in a korma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was stealing kitchen utensils last night... And I barely made it out without getting caught. But it was a whisk I was willing to take.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who walked into the the bar... Then he said to the bartender, "I bet you didn''t see the second ''the'' in the title, did you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A southern white woman waits in her seat in a restaurant alone. She keeps looking around, with an anxious look on her face. She takes sips of her wine and keeps checking her phone, reading over the Tinder conversations of the sweet guy she met. Finally, her date arrives. A handsome white man, in a white button-up shirt and blue jeans. He sits down and apologizes for being late. "It''s not problem, hun" she says, laughing nervously. "There''s one thing I gotta ask you though: it said on your Tinder bio that you''re "a rapist"? Do you, like... HAVE to put that on there... legally?" The man is shocked at her words. "What?? Oh my goodness, that must be a typo! No no no, I''m very strongly against that sort of action. No, I''m a *racist*." "Oh, thank God! For a second there, I was really worried about my safety!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a rooster, and a whore? A Rooster will wake the farmer with "a Cock a Doodle Doo!" whereas a Whore will wake the farmer as "a Any Cock''ll Doo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vegans are just as bad as non vegans. Stop drinking water, THATS A *FISHES HOUSE* YOU SICK FUCK!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Timmy: Is it a sin to wear shorts? They are so comfortable. Catholic Priest: No, I don''t think its wrong to enjoy feeling little boys shorts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Timmy''s english lesson... ...was about food today. "Good morning class" says the teacher, "today''s lesson is about food! Let''s start by mentioning things we can eat. Come on kids." Sally raises her arm "bread!" "Very good, Sally!" Says the teacher. "Cornflakes!" says Billy. "Good one, cornflakes! Anyone else?" Timmy raises his hand and yells "Lamps!'' The teacher pauses for a moment, confused: "Lamps? You can''t eat lamps, what made you think that?" Timmy: "well last night I was walking past my parent''s bedroom and I heard my dad say to my mom: turn off the lamp cause I''m gonna shove it down your throat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Catch me if you can... ...said the phrase to the other phrase', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can I invest in the Mexican airline industry? Call me crazy but once this wall goes up Ive got a gut-feeling I think thats one industry that will really be taking off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are new pants like a sub-par mansion? There''s no ball room', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Steve Bannon call Trump supporters working-class hobbits? Because they''re friends with grand wizards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was gonna masturbate to Ellen. But I just wasn''t feeling it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a man backs into a car... So older man backs into a car while trying to leave a parking lot. After hitting the car, the old man looks in the mirror to see a midget hop out, obviously very angry. The midget goes up to the door and yells, "You just back into me, and I''m not happy". The elderly man takes off his glasses and responds, "Well then which one are ya".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and red all over? A sunburnt penguin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m looking for a joke about a sandwich I saw the other day so I can repost it... Ah, right sub!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I''m gone. Credit to Steven Wright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Sith Lord''s favorite drink at the bar? A Palpitini', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was stunned last night when my wife told me I was too wrapped up in myself. When the hell did I get a wife?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pet Ewok that stays inside? An Endor pet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a formula that can predict Al Gore''s dance moves? An Al Gore Rhythm algorithm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump walks into the Oval office, turns to his administrative team and says, I want to organise the deportation of 10,000 Muslims and one kitten. Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Mike Pence says. Mr. President, why do you want to deport a kitten? Trump smiles and turns to the rest of the table. You see, no one cares about the Muslims.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like toilet paper... You''re either on a roll.....or you''re taking shit from some asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For every dollar that a man makes, a woman makes 70 cents. That''s not fair. The man is only left with 30.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Genders are like the twin towers There used to be 2 of them, but now it is a sensitive topic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what, those protests changed my mind I thought only some of them didn''t have jobs but now I think all of the protestors don''t have jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I came out of the closet to my mom today but she told me I hadn''t completely cleaned up so I had to go back in', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The audible adverts are telling me to feel every word... But that would make me a literal sex offender', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Speeding ticket Driver: "What am i supposed to do with this speeding ticket?" Officer: "Keep it, When you get four of them, You get a bicycle!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of cookies do monkeys make? Chocolate chimp cookies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I brought a large amount of sperm off the internet last night, I shouldn''t of done it but you know what they say, Sex cells', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Potassium texted Sodium asking to go for coffee Sodium just said Na. Potassium replied K.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do blind people learn about sex? The hands on way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the doctors I have been having a lot of trouble reading lately so I went to the doctors. After a few tests he gave me a paper with my diagnosis and I apparently have something called "Lexdysia".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On my 16th birthday, my family tried to surprised me with a car But they missed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you spare just $2.00? Ranji is a 9yr old living in Namibia, he only has 1 leg, 1 eye and 1 arm. Each day he has to ride 7 miles to school along a narrow road on a rusty bike with bent wheels, no brakes and only one pedal.... If you send just $2.00, you get the video for it. It''s fucking hilarious.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fine-looking gentleman sat down in the main dining room of an expensive restaurant. He ordered a big dinner and spent an hour enjoying himself. After he was given the check, he summoned the headwaiter. "Ah, my friend," he said, "that was a delicious meal! Perhaps you don''t remember that I was a guest at this same table just about a year ago. And at that time I couldn''t pay the check, so you, sir had me thrown out in full view of all the other diners." "I am so sorry, sir," said the head waiter, "but, you understand..." "Oh it''s quite all right," interrupted the gentleman, "but I''m afraid I''ll have to trouble you again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I see lovers'' names carved in a tree, I don''t think its cute... I just think it''s crazy how many people bring knives on a date.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to workers at IHOP start their shift? One foot at a time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are walking through the woods when they came across a set of tracks The first blonde says, "those are deer tracks" The second replies, "No those are moose tracks" "No, deer tracks" "No, moose tracks" "Deer tracks!" "Moose tracks!" "DEER TRACKS!" "MOOSE TRACKS!" They were still arguing when the train hit them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the magic tractor? It went down the road and turned into a field.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are don''t black folks go on cruise? They are not falling for that again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#69: (NSFW) Why did the chicken give her anal? To take her to the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One week into his administration, Donald Trump''s top aide walks into his office... "Sir, your new policies have been a success. We''ve already deported three Brazilian immigrants!" "Great, there can''t be many left then!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An African man was found lying on the ground with a grain of rice next to him in the morning, what happened? He was vomiting the whole night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an orangutan holding a spoon? I don''t know I was asking you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does everyone think Trump is gonna start WW3? If anything, with today''s weaponry he''d start Cold War Part II', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who do you not want to see with a tampon? The Kool-Aid Man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do gamers say "get shit on"? Because they rectum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many times does 34 go into 16? I don''t know, ask Joey Buttafuoco.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is the most curious planet? Tellus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t be sad Because sad backwards is das, and das is nicht gut', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Chinese are celebrating the year of the rooster Meanwhile the Americans are celebrating the year of the cock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m guessing Trump has been Rick Rolled too many times ... Because he just gave you up, let you down and deserted you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between men and women? A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knew ED stood for Erectile Disfunction. Just realized it also means Executive Disorder. Pretty much the same thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar. A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my steak. Dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL I know more words than Shakespeare Shakespeare. Albatross. Conglomerate. Sasquatch. Carnival. I have more...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife accused me of being immature... So i told her to get out of my fort, because she didn''t know the password.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends Her: -Do you have any friends? Him: -You bet, all seasons, on DVDs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes into a forest. If a woman goes into the forest and makes a sound, and there isn''t a man there to hear her, is she still wrong?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you ever get that feeling like your being watched? ''Cause if it''s bothering you I''ll stop. *Edit*: It''s supposed to be you''re. I''m know I''m stupid. You can stop telling me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats better than winning silver in the special olympics? Not being disabled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smoking seriously harms you and others around you So smoke casually for the sake of public health', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Beyonce sing "To the left, to the left"? Because she has no rights.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, brunette, and redhead are each pregnant and at the doctor''s office... While sitting in the waiting area, they begin chatting. The brunette says "I was on the bottom so I''m having a girl!" The redhead says "I was on top so I''m having a boy!" The blonde starts crying hysterically. The brunette and redhead ask her what''s wrong. The blonde says "I''m going to have a puppy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you eat pussy in the morning? You ever tried to open a grilled cheese sandwich?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Tyler1 and the Earth have in common? They''re both perpetually tilted. What''s the difference between Tyler1 and Earth? Earth isn''t toxic to all known life. : ^ )', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I''m studying..... FOR MY PROSTATE EXAM!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This must be Reddit''s most eco-friendly sub... 99% recycled content.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A five year old boy was detained at a US airport for hours because he posed a security threat. Makes sense. What better assassin to kill a 5 year old president? Credit: /u/mattholomew', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('say his TRUE name 3 times with me children! "Trumpleforeskin! Trumpleforeskin! Trumpleforeskin!" And just like that, the evil troll in the White House crumpled into a pile of dust!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they don''t C#', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by accidentally turning on the speakers connected to my pc (porn) instead of turning on the stereo ones... ...whoops, wrong sub', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the egg say to the frying pan? You crack me up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Mexican with no protein? No Whey Jos', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t know what''s worse... Saying "It will only take 10 seconds" to get my wife to sleep with me or the fact that it''s true.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are being interviewed for a job at the same time The interviewer says "Alright, you can get the job if you can come up with a sentence with the words green, pink and yellow." First man replies "Well that''s easy, my favorite colors are green, pink and yellow." Interviewer smiles and says "You''re hired!" The second man scoffs and says "I saw a bird that was green, pink and yellow." Interviewer says "You got it!" Finally, the third man thinks for a while until he says "The phone rang green green, I pinked it up and said yellow!" The end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When The Devil Tries To Buy My Soul I''m Going To Show Him Pure Evil. Going to give him a 40p card charge', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A soldier ran up to a nun A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, "Please, may I hide under your skirt. I''ll explain later." The nun agreed... A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, "Sister, have you seen a soldier?" The nun replied, "He went that way." After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, "I can''t thank you enough, sister. You see, I don''t want to go to Syria." The nun said, "I understand completely." The soldier added, "I hope I''m not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!" The nun replied, "If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls&. I don''t want to go to Syria either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the Japanese Jesus say after praying? Ramen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The children were lined up in......... The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray, "Take only one. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. One child whispered to another, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 2000 mockingbirds? 2kilo mocking birds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am thinking of selling my vacuum cleaner. Well...it spends all it''s day collecting dust', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, an Aussie and a Scotsman are at a bar An Englishman, an Aussie and a Scotsman are at a bar, all having a beer. A fly lands in the Englishmans beer, he pushes the beer away with a look of disgust and orders a new one. A few minutes later another fly lands in the Aussies beer. He flicks the fly out and continues drinking. Eventually a fly lands in the Scotsmans beer. He reaches in, pulls it out and holds it over his glass, hitting the back of it and starts shouting "Spit it out ya little bastid!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love him or hate him at least President Trump is raising awareness of one of the greatest challenges facing America..... ....Mental Health. ''Cause either that dude is crazy or I am and my best guess is before all this is said and done we''re all going to need a little therapy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s our boy Donald''s favorite instrument? The *trump*et I''ll see myself out promptly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Trump tell Yates? You''re fired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife is like a hand grenade... Take off the ring and say good bye to your house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bear have to go to the hospital Because he was bearly alive!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Nazi camp and terrorist camp? Concentration required.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a comma and a cat? One has a pause at the end of a clause and the other has claws at the end of its paws.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Damn girl, your ass is like a treasure chest. Ah thank you. But why? It''s well hidden.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wth is a mellon baller? Is that like a cantaloupe with an uzi?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at a retro night down at the club The DJ played "The Twist", so I did the twist. Then he played "The Macarena", and I did the Macarena. When he played "Come on Eileen", that''s when the police arrested me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother used to always say "give your food a rinse before you eat it." Lovely woman. Terrible sandwiches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a horror film with a reality TV show? The evening news', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my friend in North Korea how life was He said he can''t complain', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say what you like about Hitler, because he''s dead and can''t complain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what kind of tree I would be? A knotty Pine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the eighth day God said: -Widescreen is the best for humanity. Sony 16:9.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does opening an ideal bar and making a woman happy have in common? Take care of 2 things, liquor in the front, poker in the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man inserted an ''ad'' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day Jon Snow was talking about Reddit. It turns out he knows kn0thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of meat does a catholic priest eat on Friday? Nun', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be careful about what you buy online If you buy stuff online, please check out the seller very carefully. One of my friends just lost $300 plus taxes on a penis enlarger. The bastard sent him a magnifying glass and the only instruction came along with was "DO NOT USE IN SUNLIGHT".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you turn a normal joke into an american joke? Fucking unnecessarily add "fucking" as much as fucking possible.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apart from humans, the only creature that has sex for pleasure is the dolphin... Do you know how many animals I had to screw to find that out?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Buzzfeeds top 10 list of torture methods Number 7 will shock you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a horny terrorist do? He blows himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shower pom A little girl was showering with her mom when she noticed her mom has hair between her legs and asks her what that is. Her mom tells her it''s a special shower pom that she can use to clean herself with. Few days later the little girl runs excitedly to her mom and says "mommy I''ve figured out another use for your special shower pom!" The mother is confused and asks what does she mean, the little girl then replied "I saw daddy clean his teeth with the babysitter''s pom the other day!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a grandfather clock and your grandma''s favourite breakfast? The letter L', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you eat a sub sandwich on a submarine, what do you eat on a train? A pastrainmi sandwich.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked a sailor for directions to a brothel. [NSFW] He pointed to a building and said "Thar she blows"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a library and asked for a book on suicide The librarian replied "Fuck off! You won''t bring it back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dwarf girlfriend went to work this morning upset with me. My dwarf girlfriend went to work this morning upset with me, because I''ve been taking the piss out of her size. So I''m going all out to make it up to her tonight. I''ve got a good bottle of wine in and bought her the latest dvd box set of her favourite programme. When she gets in from work I''m going to order her favourite takeaway for her tea, then go upstairs and run her a nice hot sink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday I crashed my car into a midget He got out and said "I''m not happy" I replied "Which one are you then?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What good did the Trump administration do for the American public? Public health. With all the marches Trump triggers, the average American person has never been more fit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Science have confirmed that humans can consume extremely poisonous materials and even drink molten lava **Once**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I threw my sandal at the light switch to turn it off, but I missed.. It was a complete flip - flop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is this possible? Whenever I say something bad, I get in trouble, but... Whenever Donald Trump says something bad, he gets more supporters!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Soviet Russia and Deadpool? In Soviet Russia, x find you In Deadpool, X Gon'' Give It To Ya', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Donald Trumps favorite song? ICE ICE baby', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of the cakes is missing from my German cake stall... ... I''m worried that it was stollen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate libras Them and their media are destroying this country!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why isn''t Batman black? Because then he wouldn''t be able to go to a store without Robin''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you ever feel like your life is meaningless and pointless Just remember that someone out there is fitting indicators on BMWs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Chinese anti-vaxxer? Wu Ping Coff', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a circus and a strip club? The circus has cunning stunts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the confessional at church Man: Father i have sinned. Father: What have you done my son? Man: I had sex with my wife. Father: That is not a sin, you are married to this woman. Man: I know, but I did it from behind. Father: My son, that is fine, the Lord understands human needs. Man: But father, i did it while her head was in the freezer. Father: As long as it was consensual between you and your wife you have not sinned. Go now and say a Hail Mary and the Lords Prayer. Man: Thank you father.. Oh and I would recommend that you dont buy any frozen veg at the supermarket, they banned us for some reason...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My name is Ezra. Spelling my name is easy... r, a', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Pakistani hospital and a terrorist camp? We don''t fund hospitals in Pakistan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sticky? Crap, I forgot the punchline.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blanket say when it fell of the bed? Oh Sheeet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why has nobody heard of the new band 1023 megabits? They don''t have any gigs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens to a frog''s car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two peasants turned vampire hunters entered the local cemetery.... ...Looking for the dreaded vampire that threatened their homes. As they searched among the tombstones, they found one covered in blood, black as night and decorated with a bat motif. As night fell, they begun excavating it, getting to the coffin just as the last rays of the sun began to disappear. They threw it open, stakes at the ready but found it empty. Off to the right, a small ordinary tombstone began to tremble and out burst the vampire! As he closed on the helpless pair he laughed saying, "Ah-HA! You fools! You have made a *grave mis-stake!*" *sorrynotsorry*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Muslim and a terrorist? I don''t know, I just sign executive orders. I''ll be here all week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Its not a Muslim ban. Trump: "Its not a Muslim ban there are plenty of other Muslim countries that weren''t banned. Its definitely not a Muslim ban" Darth Bannon: "No its not but its a good start"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hi do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were stranded on a desert island, what would you bring with you? I would take one for the team and bring Donald Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Muslim, a Mexican, and Trump are walking down the beach..... ....when the Muslim stubs his toe on a lamp. The Mexican picks it up, and Trump rubs it. Out of the lamp comes a Genie saying "the three of you have set me free, so shall the three of you be granted a wish." The Muslim says, "I wish for all my Muslim people to be happy, healthy, and at home in the Middle East." *Poof* all the Muslim people are back in the Middle East. The Mexican says, "I wish for all my Mexican people to be happy, healthy, and at home in Mexico." *Poof* all the Mexican people are back in Mexico. Trump then looks at the Genie and asks, "All the Muslims and Mexicans are out of America?" The Genie responds, "Yes, they are all happy, healthy, and at home." Trump narrows his eyes and growls, "Build the walls."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say comedy comes from a dark place. That''s why farts are so funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son told me he''s transgender... So that makes me transparent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s long and hard and full of seamen? A submarine, you pervs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hi Reddit. I am David Miller, head of the American Lung Foundation. Asthma anything', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a redhead and a brunette are stranded on an island... Suddenly, the brunette spots land not far from the island. She tells the other two: "I''ll swim there and come back with help" But as she is swimming, she gets tired a quarter of the way there and swims back. The redhead says: "Don''t worry, I''m confident in my ability to swim there and come back with help" But she gets tired a third of the way there and swims back. The blonde says: "You guys are weak. I''m sure I can get there and come back" But she gets tired halfway there, turns around and swims back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Old Tamil Joke An elephant befriends an ant. One day, they decide to take a walk. They''re chatting and having a fun time when the elephant is suddenly hit by a car. The drivers rushes off, leaving the badly injured elephant bleeding helplessly. Blood pours out of his wounds at an alarming rate, but the ant still tries to reassure his friend. "We can go to the hospital! They can save you." The ant promises. "I''ll die from blood loss before we get there." "Don''t worry," the ant says. "I''ll donate my blood!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know how it feels to be a noble gas. No one wants to bond with me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do stars make such good comedians? Because they''re gas!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does your asshole every get jealous... Of the amount of shit that comes out of your mouth?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dirty I like my women how i like my wood dead and wet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little three year old boy is sitting on the toilet A Little Three Year Old Boy Is Sitting On The Toilet. His Mother Thinks He Has Been In There Too Long, So She Goes In To See What''s Up. The Little Boy Is Sitting On The Toilet Reading A Book. But About Every 10 Seconds Or So He Puts The Book Down, Grips Onto To The Toilet Seat With His Left Hand And Hits Himself On Top Of The Head With His Right Hand. His Mother Says: "billy, Are You All Right?you''ve Been In Here For A While... Billy Says: "i''m Fine, Mommy.. I Just Haven''t Gone ''doody'' Yet." Mother Says: "ok, You Can Stay Here A Few More Minutes.but, Billy, Why Are You Hitting Yourself On The Head?" Billy Says: "works For Ketchup."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What three, two letter words, mean small? Is it in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two fruits who wanted to run away and get married? Turns out they cantaloupe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s an oyster''s favorite band? Pearl Jam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('January is national stalking awareness month... That crept up on my fast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arguing with a woman is like reading the Software License Agreement In the end, you ignore everything and click "I Agree".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican man has been running away from the cops for 3 days... The authorities stated that he is a Juan-ted man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a centi-peed a pint, how much would a precipice piss? A sheer drop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband sent a text to wife at night Husband sent a text to wife at night, Hi I will get late, plz try and wash all my dirty clothes And make sure you prepare my favorite dish before I return. He sent another text, I forgot to tell u that I got an increase in My salary at the end of month Im getting u a new car She text back, Omg really? Husband Replied: No I just wanted to make sure u got my 1st msg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday... A week later, he told me it was the most violent book he ever read.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m reading an interesting book about Electromagnetic Levitation I can''t put it down', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can think of one benifit global warming might bring... LA will be under water if we keep it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican cartel asked a hacker for help Hacker: Sorry guys, I can''t crack this.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Has anyone tried... Turning Donald Trump off and then on again?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BREAKING: Messi has just been substituted by a noob player, these are the words of the coach post-game! "Ah woops, wrong sub"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man at a job interview A man walks into an office for a job interview. The employer asks a few questions to the man, He finishes and says he has 1 final question "what is your biggest flaw?" The man immediately replies "I''m unpredictable!" The employer gulps and says "really?" The man has an evil smirk and locks the door... The man than says ........... "Yeah"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I beat my addiction I''m addicted to my wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did Ed''s girlfriend go? Sheeran away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a seatbelt and a condom? One of them prevents lives being **lost** in an accident and the other prevents lives being **made** in an accident.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yoda was scared of 7 because..... 6, 78.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU by eating my friend''s sandwich wrong sub', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my Mexican friend if he was upset about Trump''s wall... He said, "Eh, I''ll get over it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking: Spelling Bee Official Pronounced Dead. He then used it in a sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] How many times in your life have you masturbated? Beats me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear? The toilet was stolen at my local police station. The cops have nothing to go on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say America runs on Dunkin... That''s why I always risk my life crossing 3 busy lanes of traffic for my large iced, extra extra.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today Trump consulted his alter ego about lifting the ban.. Yep, Bannon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NSFW-My wife asked me to spice things up in the bedroom Apparently pouring cayanne pepper up her snatch isn''t what she had in mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a dead baby and a apple? I don''t ejaculate on a Apple before I eat it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? Don''t worry, she didn''t, either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Joke My Joke: Back in he Old West there were these 2 cowboys Mike and Larry. And one day they''re talking and come to the conclusion that they''re both sick of punching cows. They wander off, it''s hard to rope them, they''re BIG and dangerous, etc. So they discuss what other animals they could herd and after much discussion Mike has the bright idea of herding chickens! Yes, they are small, they stick together, and there''s plenty of food for them to eat. So they get a bunch of chickens and herd their flock all over the west. One day, they enter Dodge City with their flock, but as they''re going down main street, a bunch of cowboys start laughing at them and throwing eggs, etc. So Mike says to Larry....I think we better get the flock out of Dodge..................z', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a gold-plated Ferrari and free-range chicken ranch? The chicken ranch has the cocks on the outside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate talking with Jewish people It really takes me out of Mein Kampfort zone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the hobo gangster? Word on the street is he''s roofless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who has killed more indians than John Wayne? Union Carbide Corporation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the front page political tooting on reddit? Trumpit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Age is just a number... wrong, its a word', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Playing Pinball at an Arcade I was playing pinball while in an arcade, I guess I was doing good because a little kid was watching me. My ball got stuck, and the kid saw, and shook the machine causing the game to think I was cheating. I was so tilted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hold my beer. -2017', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marylou.... A husband was sitting quietly reading his paper one morning, peacefully enjoying himself, when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the back of the head with a huge frying pan. "What the heck was that for!" he asked. She replies, "I found a piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Marylou written on it..." "Oh, dear, remember two weeks ago when I went to the horse races? Well, Marylou was the name of one of the horses I placed a bet on." The explanation seems to appease her, and she leaves the room to go about her business. Three days later, the man is again sitting in his chair reading the morning paper. His wife abruptly hangs up the telephone and then whacks him on the back of the head with the huge frying pan. "What the heck did I do wrong this time!" he asked. She answered, "Your horse just called!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We, the American people have a great sense of humor. Have you seen our President?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone stole my mood ring, And I don''t know how to feel about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fish went swimming. And it drowned. *My 4 year old daughter has just told me her first "joke". She finds it hilarious. "You get it? Fish cant drown. Thats funny!" I''m worried..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Taliban Outpost and a Pakistani School? I don''t know, why don''t you ask the 50 drone pilots on this sub?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirates favorite toy?? Aarrrh sea boats.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like my ice cream... Rich, thick, and occasionally headache-inducing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young bear cub was roaming the jungle . An animal he had never seen before comes strolling out of the trees. He asks " excuse me what kind of animal are you?" The animal replys " well, I am a tiger" The bear acts suprised and says " are you sure? You don''t look like a tiger." The tiger says " Do you think I''m a lyin?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross professor trelawney with human rights issues? American sybill liberties union', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Darling, I''m sorry but I just didnt like it Little Johnny once bought his Grandma a very nice, luxurious toilet brush for her birthday. But when he went to visit her a couple of weeks later, it wasn''t in the bathroom. Little Johnny asked his Grandma, Gran, what happened to the toilet brush I gave you? Darling, I''m sorry but I just didnt like it. It was too scratchy. After all those years, Ive gotten used to the toilet paper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anybody see that movie about the dog who befriends a dolphin? A Dog''s Porpoise', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can''t find any batteries for my vibrator What a buzz kill!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sandwich walked into the bar The sandwich walked into the bar. It sat on the counter and asked for a banana. The waiter said, "Sorry Sir, we don''t serve food here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the new movie where Donald Trump becomes a bug? It''s called "President Weevil"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many members of a given ethnic group does it take to change a lightbulb? A finite number! One to to change the bulb, the rest to act in a manner stereotypically derogatory to their ethnicity!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On Pokemon Go, I caught a rare Pepe the Frog. It unexpectedly evolved into Pee Pee the President... It learned Water Gun, Heal Block, and Can''t Escape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a Cadillac like a Woman? Cause when it''s cold in the morning and you need them the most....they won''t turn over.........z', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the people who pronounce ''Pangea'' with a hard ''g'' instead of the soft one? For the confused, I''m talking about consonantal drift.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a ninja''s favorite band? Five Finger Death Punch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know using too many commas is now illegal.... You can end up with a very lengthy sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know that tingly sensation you get when you like somebody? That''s common sense leaving your body. Edit: now I know what people mean when they say "RIP inbox".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the moose say after leaving a gay bar??? Man, I cant believe i just blew 50 bucks in there', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who was Bill Cosby''s favorite character in the 1991 film "Hook"? RUFIO! RUFIO! RU-FI-OOO!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to wear polarized glasses until I released they made me focus too far to the left or the right...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So the creator of Pac Man died today... I guess he''s the ghost now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do spinach and hard anal sex have in common? If you were forced to have it as a kid, you''ll hate it as an adult.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If John Cena stars in a cooking show,what would it be called? Snackdown Live', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What comes after 69? Mouthwash', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recently divorced supermodel puts out an ad for a new partner The ad states that there are three requirements: can''t beat me, you can''t run around on me, and must be good in bed. 20 minutes after she puts out the ad, she hears a ring on the doorbell. She opens the door and sees a man with no arms and no legs sitting in a wheelchair. She says "What are you here for?" he responds "you put out an ad in the newspaper, right?" she says "do you think you meet the requirements?" he pauses and says "I have no arms, so I can''t beat you, and i have no legs, so I can''t run around on you" she says "there''s another requirement, are you good in bed?" he says "well how do you think I rang the doorbell?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat That when you were born there was a birthquake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like McAfee antivirus Disabled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the pie go to the dentist? It needed a filling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded in a desert... A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded in a desert, when they come across a magical lamp, which the blonde then rubs repeatedly. A genie then comes out of the magic lamp, and promises to grant one wish for each of the girls. The brunette says "I just want to go home!" she is then teleported back home, safe and sound. The redhead says "I want to go back home!" she is also teleported back home. The blonde then says "I just wish my friends were here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a man of strong convictions. The District Attorney in this town is pretty good.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two scientists are studying a nest of newly-hatched crows.. The new parents are doing what they can, and the three chicks are noisy and demanding. One day, the scientists notice that one of the chicks isn''t making noise anymore. They see he''s making the motions, but no sound is coming from his beak. The scientists decide to do something to try to help, since they reason that crows use their voices for social interaction well as for warning others of potential harm. It''s got his own good. They take the baby crow from the nest, and run a series of tests, and scans. They administer medicines, and even try some other therapies that are less traditional, but for all they do, the baby crow still cannot make a sound. Finally, they concede defeat, and had to admit to themselves that it was just a... Lost caws... Made this up today after I saw "lost cause" on a license plate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m dating a palm tree. It''s nothing serious though. Just fronds with benefits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little marry poppins Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and red all over? The slowest zebra on the prairie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What to you call an Asian lady''s private parts? A vachina.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blackout in neighborhood last night... Police told us to wait until they shot him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Kellyanne Conway eat for lunch? Alternative snacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard Starbucks is trying to hire a lot more refugees Those poor art majors are going to suffer, then', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brother and sister are fucking in her room when their dad walks in... And says, "You slut, you''re just like your mother!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday a clown held the door open for me I thought it was a nice jester', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When asking a basic white girl if she wants some Starbucks, the short answer will always be "yas" The long answer is probably going to be "yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nintendo Switch to PC.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats got 2 legs and bleeds? half a cow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should the real name for a colonoscopy be? A colonoscopoo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the recent political events all my friends were like "we''re going to rally" And I was like why are you going to North Carolina there''s nothing to do there it''s so boring.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anyone ever try Canadian Bacon? I hear it''s the nicest bacon around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Harry Potter''s best friend and his pot? Nothing, they''re both cauldron.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just read a funny joke about the movie Ground Hog Day... I just read a funny joke about the movie Ground Hog Day...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a lover and an electric guitar have in common? You''ll get a lot of feedback if you''re not fingering them correctly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are morbidly obese people and child molesters alike? Both want to get into smaller pants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What d''you get if you cross a mountain climber with a mosquito? You can''t cross a scalar with a vector.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do drug dealers get punished by Islamic-Extremist Terrorist in the Middle East? They get stoned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy is having sex with a girl and it feels terrible It doesn''t feel wet or smooth but more like rough and dry. He finally asks her what''s going on down there and she says "Oh sorry about that, be right back." She goes into the bathroom for a minute and comes back out, they start having sex again. Now it''s nice and wet, smooth, and feels great. The guy says "That feels great, what did you do?" She replies "I pulled the scabs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The guy who used to bully me in middle school still takes my lunch money. On the other hand, he makes great Subway sandwiches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to study Computer Science but then I stopped... Turns out its just a sudo science.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a oral and rectal thermometer? The taste', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between someone who makes wooden furniture and someone who does paint jobs? One is a carpenter and one is a car painter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got into a fight with my girlfriend the other day She was saying a bunch of generic stuff like ''I need to learn to let things go'' and ''I always keep things bottled up inside'' and ''I make her feel trapped.'' I had to interrupt her pretty quickly and tell her "you can drop all the hints you want, I''m not letting you out of this basement".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At this point... AIDS is worried about testing positive for Trump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do spiders find significant others? They use a web-based dating service.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with intellectual difficulties is in a basement staring at the door. Downstairs at the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you tell a German who wants to know the time? Nine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny: Mommy, what''s a transsexual? Mom: I think you should ask Aunt Dave that question.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got in touch with my inner self today. Thats the last time I''m buying 1 ply toilet paper at the dollar store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have the body of a 20 year old model, But it takes up too much room in my freezer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to cheer my mentally challenged friend up... ...but I guess I shouldn''t have said "Don''t let an extra chromosome get you down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is called the president of a packaging company? The Boxx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a normal shower and a golden shower? I don''t drink everything that comes out of the spout of a normal shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Peach mad at Mario? He forgot to delete his Bowser history.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call someone with a rubber toe? Roberto', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] what did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whether you like it or not Whether you like it or not, he''s the man in charge. And I have to say, so far I agree with almost every decision he has made. Some of those decisions have been very controversial, and I know a lot of people don''t like him, but he has surrounded himself with some of the greatest minds and most talented people in the world. I''m confident that history will judge him as one of the best, if not the very best this country has ever seen. And there''s absolutely no denying his amazing leadership qualities. I know not everyone is going to agree with me, but these are just a few of the reasons I love Bill Belichick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? One', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that Fedex is soon to acquire rival company UPS. After the merger it will be called Fed-Up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl realised that she had grown hair between her legs. She got worried and asked her mom about that hair. Her mom calmly said, That part where the hair has grown is called Monkey, be proud that your monkey has grown hair. &. the girl smiled. At dinner, she told her sister, My monkey has grown hair. Her sister smiled and said, Thats nothing, mine is already eating bananas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a particularly crabby Chinese grandma? A crust-asian. ^(I''m sorry....)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a pimp use to water his plants? Hoes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a gay horse eat? Haaaaayyyy What does a black horse eat? Hay motherfucker!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the duck go to rehab? (Different answer than normal) He wanted to quack down on his drug usage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a priest walks into a bar... Looks at the ugly walls, and says to the bartender: "My son, you must repaint".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend said she was "Bi". Little did I know she meant bipolar...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the father of a transgender invisible? Because he was a transparent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You look like Helen Brown. I look better in blue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I JUST SAW A SEA COW CHANGING COLOR!! OH THE HUE MANATEE!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Food is like dark humor Not everyone gets it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bum comes up to the front door of a very expensive house and taps gently on the door When the rich owner answers, the bum asks him, "Please, sir, could you give me something to eat? I haven''t had a good meal in several days." The owner says, "I have made a fortune in my lifetime by supplying goods for people. I''ve never given anything away for nothing. However, if you go around the back, you will see a gallon of paint and a clean paint brush. If you will paint my porch, I will give you a good meal." So the bum goes around back and a while later he again knocks on the door. The owner says, "Finished already? Good. Come on in. Sit down. The cook will bring your meal right in." The bum says, "Thank you very much. But there''s something that I think you should know. It''s not a porch you got there. It''s a BMW."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar... Ouch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you want to here a joke about the Jonestown Massacre? It has quite the Punch Line. edit: *hear. I blame autocorrect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the differebce between an Afghani Military Base and a Pakistani Elementary School? I don''t know, I just fly the drone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is light beer like having sex in a canoe on the river? Both are fucking close to water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t a blonde dial 911? She can''t find the 11.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Gordon Freeman experience when he turned 40? A Half Life crisis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you have to work tomorrow, call in sick. If your boss says "Well you don''t sound sick." Say, "Well I''m fucking my sister; that sound sick enough for ya?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There comes a time in a man''s life when he has to choose: either stand up for what he believes, or stay down on his knees. On mass, that time comes about a hundred times, and the decision is always made out of peer pressure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Politics] Trump: ''The less immigrants we bring in the better'' Pence: ''The fewer'' Trump: ''I told you not to call me that yet''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Poles need to cut tree? 96 and a plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what''s the difference between a black man and a box of donuts one of them''s already full of holes before the cops see them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best computer for producing music? A Dell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the Cannibal eat the Politician? Because he was full of shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going through my wardrobe, trying to select a suit for my grandmother''s funeral. I said, "What shall I wear?" "I don''t really care," said my mum. "As long as you don''t you stick out." It''s not easy being a necrophiliac.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that Trump is writing a book? It''s called "My Struggle"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son didn''t want to study So I teached him a lesson', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who built King Arthur''s round table? Sir Cumference', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An airplane was about to crash with 4 passengers on board. An airplane was about to crash. There were 4 passengers on board, but only 3 parachutes. The 1st passenger said, "I am Russell Westbrook and I''m averaging a triple double. The Thunder and my millions of fans need me, and I can''t afford to die." So he took the 1st pack and left the plane. The 2nd passenger, Donald Trump, said, "I am the newly-elected US President, and I am the smartest President in American history, so my people don''t want me to die." He took the 2nd pack and jumped out of the plane. The 3rd passenger, the Pope, said to the 4th passenger, a 10 year old schoolboy, "My son, I am old and don''t have many years left, you have more years ahead so I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute." The little boy said, "That''s okay, Your Holiness, there''s a parachute left for you. America''s smartest President took my backpack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it''s hilarious.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s to virgins Thanks for fucking nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone gave a handjob to Albert Einstein... What a stroke of genius!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black guy eating KFC? A bandwagonner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did God invent colour blindness? A: So someone will fancy the ginger kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People always ask me what my wife does for a living, but it''s just too hard for me to say. You see... She sells sea shells by the sea shore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would the Greek gods have been like without their leader? Zeusless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump Executive Order #16 Trump: From now on, 2+2 will equal 5. Reuters: But that can''t be right, 2+2=4. We proved that, too! Trump: You can say 2+2=4, but this is alternative math.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve got an annoying habit of quoting Elton John lyrics... ...I hope you don''t mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you read Donald Trump''s book, The Art of the Deal? It has four chapter 11s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quitting smoking is sooooo easy, I do it all the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife called me at work today. "Honey, do you want to come home at lunch for a quickie?" "Sarah, it''s pronounced Quiche."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Israeli, German, Russian, and American doctors were talking ... An Israeli doctor says: "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President...Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde, Brunette, and Redhead all meet at the Stairway to Heaven... An angel at the top says, "I''m going to tell a joke to you all. If you do not laugh, you may advance one stair, but if you DO laugh, you''ll fall off into Hell." The angel tells the 1st joke and the women do not laugh. They all advance. The angel tells the 2nd joke and the Redhead laughs, and she falls off the Stairway. On the 6th joke, the Brunette laughs and falls of the Stairway. After all 15 jokes, the Blonde makes it all the way up the stairs. The angel cheers, "Congratulations! You made it into Heaven!" The Blonde begins to laugh hysterically. "Why are you laughing?" The angel asks. The Blonde responds while trying to pull herself together, "I just got the 1st joke...!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Guinevere say to king Arthur after sex? "You Camelot".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Imagine there was a government agency called Planned Parenthood that euthanized old racists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are turning into good drivers! So if you''re a good driver, watch out for women turning!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Buddhist asks a hot dog vendor to "Make me one with everything." The Buddhist gives him a fifty and the vendor just pockets it. The Buddhist asks for change and the vendor replies, "Change comes from within."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My favorite english writer is Dickens JK Rowling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Armageddon Knocking Knock! Knock! Who''s there? Armageddon . . . Hello? Knock knock! Um ... who''s there? Armageddon!! . . . Hello? Knock! Knock! Um ... who''s there? ARMAGEDDON! Um ... Armageddon who? ARMAGEDDON tired out here! Open the GOD-DAMNED door!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many people say we are what we eat Yet the same people say that cannibals act like animals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s favorite video game? *Papers, Please*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Ghosts favorite porn? Boo-Kake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hotel owner, radio host, and a banker walk into the situation room. Fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend was sad that her dog died so I went out and got her an identical dog Then she said "what the hell am I going to do with two dead dogs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Had a blood test the other day. I did really well, A+', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life found on Mars!! The rover Curiosity found what appears to be an early marsupial ancestor of the American possum. Unfortunately, the rover Opportunity ran over it the day before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter how good are you doing something There''s always an asian that can do it with eyes closed. With love, An auto-racist Asian', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is this new band everyone is talking about? Some muslim band is all over the news!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m torn: on the one hand, I absolutely hate xenophobia, sexism, and racism on the other hand, orange is my favorite color.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grape threw a huge outdoor party on a hot, sunny day... It was raisin'' the roof.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two prisoners wanted to escape prison... But there were a 100 fences between them and freedom, they decided to jump the fences. when they had jumped 99 fences one of them says "i''m tired, let''s go back".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know a rapper was raised by lesbians? "Yo I gotta give a shoutout to my moms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m going to set up a Kickstarter for all the trump protestors... Not to donate to them, for them to donate to me. That way I can afford to take off work and do something as meaningful...like rocket league or GTA online', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Middle East theme song oh ohhhh... I''m an alien... I''m a legal alien... I am Iranian getting kicked out of New York...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my Biology professor if he had any patients. He didn''t seem too thrilled with me after that...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m an auto mechanic... So I can safely say I don''t understand the gay agenda. But I do understand the Trans mission.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was reading a Bible story to his young children He said: The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt. His son asked, What happened to the flea?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would happen, if IT technic became a doctor? Patient: I can''t bend my knee. Doctor: [*bends his knee*] Weird, works fine for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s mexican for fucked ? Deported', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally convinced mom to watch anime to prove it''s not childish and immature at all. But it''s weird to watch hentai with your parents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finished eating lunch No joke just wanted to tell someone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where can I buy donkey hide as a gift? Ass skin for a friend', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Pakistani school and a terrorist camp? I don''t fucking know I''m just a drone pilot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an elf that won''t shut up? Gobby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('AN ODD TALE There was once a man named Odd. People made fun of him because of his name so he decided to keep his gravestone blank when he died. Now when people pass by the burial site, they point and say, "That''s odd."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was young I asked my mum what a couple was she said,"oh two or three." And she wonders why her marriage didn''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked into a bar... and I said to the Bartender: *Bartender, may I please have a Rum and Coke?* The bartender replied: *I''m sorry, we only have Pepsi, is that okay?* I replied: *That''s fine.* So he poured me a Pepsi and Coke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey. But I turned myself around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many union construction workers does it take to change a lightbulb? Twelve. Two to drive the lightbulb across the state, one to supervise, two to hold "stop/slow" signs, one to make sure traffic cones are arranged alphabetically, one to actually change the lightbulb, and 5 to stand around with hands in their pockets. With union breaks every 30 minutes it should take no more than 2 weeks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between American Women and Muslim Women? The American Women gets stoned before she has sex', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were there so many protestors in CA this weekend? Because they were able to turn all that new water into whine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two muffins are in the oven. One muffin says to the other "It sure is hot in here". The other exclaims " AHHHH! A talking muffin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve searched high and low for my brother''s killer but nobody is willing to do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Menstruation jokes aren''t funny. They''re bloody hilarious!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My new bank is awesome. It''s called condensation savings and loan. They give credit where credit is dew. Edit: typo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I made a deal that whoever woke up first on our anniversary, would have to wake the other with oral sex... I still don''t know why she woke up screaming with my dick in her mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does the Lone Ranger take his garbage? To the dump, to the dump, to the dump-dump-dump!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are women and children evacuated first in a disaster? So we can think about a solution in silence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a thief and a comedian? At least thieves are known for stealing other people''s shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('called UPS in Germany today to ask when they were shipping my Oculus Rift they said "VR ready"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 89 year old man visits his doctor "Hey Doc, I am really concerned. I am together with this beautiful 21 year old, and to satisfy her in bed I have to take my Viagra pills. You''d ought to think that I am no longer capable of breeding given my age, but somehow my girlfriend just got pregnant. How can that be?". "Let me tell you a little story." the doctor said. "Once upon a time there was a hunter who was going out hunting. In a hurry he managed to grab his umbrella instead of his rifle. When he found his prey, a deer, he took the shot just as he realised he had brought his umbrella instead. Still, the deer fell and died. How could that be?" The doctor asked. "Well, it''s obvious. Someone else took the shot!" The man explained. "My point exactly". Edit: Formatting', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the Chinese Zodiac it is the Year of the Cock. So it makes perfect sense that Donald Trump is president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So a man says to his friend... "I can use my penis as a weapon!" "How?" "Well we live in the UK so you are only allowed to have a blade that is less than 3 inches!" (Note: I don''t know if this is true or not, I just saw the blade fact somewhere and I remembered it.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny: "Grandma, make a sound like a Frog." Grandma: "Why?" Little Johnny: "Cause daddy says we''ll make a lot of money when you croak."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m about to eat lunch. No joke just wanted to tell someone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t black people go on cruises? They''re not falling for that one again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married couple was watching volleyball game at a beach when the wife spotted a couple in the bleachers. They were being very affectionate. The girl was running her hands all over the boyfriend and nibbling on his ear. He had his hands on her chest. Looking at them, the wife said to her husband "I don''t know whether to watch them or the game." Husband said, "Better watch them! You already know how to play volleyball."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife''s ass smells like sardines and old milk. I''m not joking.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like grapes. Some age like fine wine. Some age like raisins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A government employee sat in his office A government employee sat in his office, and out of boredom, decided to see what was inside his old filing cabinet. He poked through the contents and came across an old brass lamp. "This will look good on my mantel," he said, and took it home with him. While polishing the lamp, a genie appeared and, as usual, granted him three wishes. "I would like an ice-cold Coke right now." He gets his Coke and drinks it. Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second wish. "I wish to be on an island with beautiful women, who find me irresistible." Suddenly, he''s on an island with gorgeous women eyeing him lustfully. He tells the genie his third and last wish. "I wish I''d never have to work again." Instantly, he was back in his government office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I did some shrugs in the gym. After someone asked me, "What are you doing here?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the karate kid train with his girlfriend? Wax on, fap off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer. "Certainly, Sir , that''ll be one cent." One Cent?" the man exclaimed. He glanced at the menu and asked: "How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle of wine?" "A nickel," the barman replied. "A nickel?" exclaimed the man. "Where''s the guy who owns this place?" The bartender replied: "Upstairs, with my wife." The man asked: "What''s he doing upstairs with your wife?" The bartender replied: "The same thing I''m doing to his business down here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A busload of politicians were driving down a country road A busload of politicians were driving down a country road, when suddenly the bus ran off the road and crashed into an old farmer''s barn. The old farmer got off his tractor and went to investigate. Soon he dug a hole and buried the politicians. A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus and asked the old farmer where all the politicians had gone. The old farmer told him he had buried them. The sheriff asked the old farmer, "Lordy, were they ALL dead?" The old farmer said, "Well, some of them said they weren''t, but you know how them crooked politicians lie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A muslim walks into US Just kidding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asks her class... "Can anyone tell me the name of Robin Hood''s girlfriend?" Little Paddy raises his hand and says "Yes Miss, it''s Trudy Glenn" "No Paddy, the answer is Maid Marion" "But Miss, what about the song? "Robin Hood, Robin Hood, riding Trudy Glenn!""', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If God called your cell phone, would you answer? Yes, but only to ask why my dick is so small.... Why God Whyyyyyyyyy why do I have such a small dick!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I could never go to acting school... There''s way too much drama.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a box of chocolates... ...You''re probably not going to finish it all if you''re diabetic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what is the stupidest animal in the jungle? The Polar Bear...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhinoceros? Hell if I know. Edit: ''Elephino.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Batman''s favourite Pokmon? Cubone, because they both don''t have parents :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife was wondering if we should wash dishes by hand, in order to save a little money. I figure that using the dishwasher uses more electricity, but less water. So overall it''s a wash.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Triceratops die out? Because they couldn''t find any Tricerabottoms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a job interview the other day... I went to a job interview the other day. The interviewer asked the question ''''what are your strengths?'''', to which I replied, honestly all I''m good at is telling jokes and fucking kids. Safe to say I got the job as a BBC TV presenter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As Dumbledore stood there stroking his wand Harry regretted transferring to Catholic School', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a pizza and a hoe? You don''t pick the crust off a pizza before you eat it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Becoming a vegetarian... Is a huge missed steak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before my Girlfriend moved in I had one night stand... Things are getting pretty serious, we now have two night stands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do feminists hate the postal service? Because they deliver straight white mail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of people in this world The ones who understands binary and the ones who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A stoned bird A stoned bird was flying when it hit a moving car. The driver stopped, found the bird and took it home to treat it. When the bird is awake in his new cage, he looked around and thought: the jail?!! Did the driver die?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What school did Darth Vader attend? Univer-sith-y ... I''ll let myself out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If history has taught us anything, then it the fact that human beings cant take care of the world and its all down to shit. So let''s try a monkey to govern us all - every Trumpling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife messed with my charging cable... I was shocked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one hat say to the other? You stay here, I''m going on ahead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ocean''s 8 is expected to come out in late 2017 but probably won''t be ready until at least 30 minutes after that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call your Japanese wife? A rice cooker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between M&Ms and America? M&M got rid of the tan ones years ago', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the green man lives in the green house, the red man lives in the red house and the blue man lives in the blue house. Who lives in the white house? The orange man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the Chinese Vicar introduce herself? By singing "I''m Asian Grace."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you elope? You can''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Hadrian so popular? Because he built a huge wall to keep the invaders out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about those new corduroy pillows? They are making headlines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would you call it if Natalie Portman starred in Lorenzo''s Oil? Lack Schwann', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was a smoker for 10 years until I decided to quit cold turkey I never thought to heat it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad told me about the birds and the bees today... Then he gave me a broom and told me to clear them out of the attic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one earthquake say to the other? Was that your fault or mine?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every cheese joke I know What did the cheese say when he looked in the mirror? Halloumi What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of a cave? Camembert What type of cheese is made backwards? Edam Which cheese doesn''t belong to you? Nacho cheese Did you hear about the explosion at the cheese factory? All that was left was de-brie Why did the cheese monger fall over? He only had one Stilton How does the cheese monger cut the cheese? Caerphilly. What type of cheese can you use to hide a horse? Mascapone', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snow Day! I get to stay home owl day. It''s gonna be a hoot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta Now it''s a Ford Focus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a terrorist what would Willy Wonka scream before he carried out an attack? Nougat Chocolatebar!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never tell lawyer jokes Lawyers don''t think they''re funny, and no one else thinks they''re jokes. Credit where credit is due: I just watched a video of Kellyanne Conway doing stand-up in 1990. This is one of hers. edit: She might have got it from somewhere else of course, and this is just where I first heard it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field =', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Trumps favorite movie? Minority Report!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump always has his partner be on top during sex. Because he can only fuck up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our son was a by-product of a raunchy night in the back of a car. With one very open-minded taxi driver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the local store and I asked... "How much for a dead battery?" I asked. He responded, to my delight. No charge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some newspapers and celebs have compared Trump to Hitler... Nazi''s are outraged.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a stripper do with her asshole everyday before work? Drops him off at band practice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher asks students to use incompletely in a sentence A teacher asked the students to use incompletely in a sentence. One student raises her hand and says " my homework is incomplete". The teacher says " close but I said to use incompletely". Little johnny raises his hand but knowing little johnnys tendencies the teacher was afraid to call on him. Nobody else raised their hand so the teacher calls on johnny. Little johnny replies " when my balls hit her asshole I know I''m in completely." Appalled by the answer she sends johnny to the principal. She then asks to use the word handsome in a sentence. Little Susie raises her hand and the teacher calls on her. Susie says " when I blow johnny my mouth gets sore so I have to use my hand some."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend was unhappy that I referred to her as sloppy seconds but she was even more unhappy with Lady Leftovers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How I learned to mind my own business: I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, and all the patients were shouting, "13....13.....13." The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a little gap in the planks, so I looked through to see what was going on. Some idiot poked me in the eye with a stick, then they all started shouting, "14....14...14."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the seal go to school for? Art art art!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of bagel can fly? A plain bagel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most people have a family tree, but I have a family cactus. Because mine is full of pricks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to fix America? Unplug the power cord wait 10 seconds, plug it back again. See if it works.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the new aftershave that drives women crazy? No! Tell me about it. It smells of $50 dollar bills', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know when you''re at a gay picnic? NSFW All the hotdogs taste like shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once dated a biologist. I don''t like to brag, but I always provided her with multiple organisms to keep her happy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Capitalism has many problems but communism only has 3 - Breakfast - Lunch - Dinner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Facebook, I am not a social media person. Facebook: But- Me: FACEBOOK, I AM NOT A SOCIAL MEDIA PERSON. YOU ARE REFUSING TO HELP. GOODBYE. *Deletes Facebook, hits the gym, lawyers up, checks himself into psych ward*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Birds for sale... All of them are going cheap!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Didn''t Gandhi''s Broken Arm Repair? Because he fought the Caste system', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian, Trump and a Mexican are captured by an Amazonian tribe They are condemned to 50 hits with a stick. The Russian goes first. After the Russian gets all 50 of his hits it''s Trump''s turn. Feeling bad they give him 1 request. Trump asks them to halve his beating. After Trump was done they felt really bad for the Mexican. They gave him 2 requests. The Mexican asks them to triple his beating. Astonished, the tribe asks what is the second request. Mexican: Put Trump on my back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give it to me! Give it to me! I''m so wet! She screamed. "No," I replied, "it''s my umbrella."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists have finally ruled out cats from any upcoming Mars missions cuz curiosity!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For sale: Second hand toilet paper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Double Negatives ...are no-nos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the strongest day of the year? The Summer Swollstice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dildo traveling through space at the speed of light? Genital warps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve attended anger management classes before... ... it was soon after my dads first Alcoholics Anonymous group. "Dad," I said, "there are a lot of angry people." My dad replied, "There are a lot of angry drunks, too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of photo doesn''t dissolve in water? A non-Polaroid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what a girl says when she gets a big dick inside her? no ? neither do I.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor : How is your headache? Man : She is fine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women = Time x Money Now it''s been previously proven that: **Women = Time x Money** And we all know that: **Time = Money** Which means we can infer that: **Women = Money x Money** And from our prior research we''ve identified that "*Money is the root of all evil*, i.e. we can infer: **Money = SQRT(EVIL)** So applying that to our previous results: **Women = SQRT(EVIL) x SQRT(EVIL)** Which can be reduced to: **Women = EVIL**', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t people like communists? Because they have no class', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the blondes belly button all red and bruised? Because her BF was a blonde too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our local brothel just went out of business... all they left us was a sign in the window... Said "Beat it... we''re closed"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate restaurants that have quirky and confusing ways of displaying men and woman bathroom signs. I mean, what am I?!? Am I a kitchen or an exit?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Donald Trump and Donald Duck? There is a human being inside of Donald Duck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I called my son "a bloody disappointment to this family", and my wife burst into tears Apparently I shouldn''t joke about miscarriage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife accused me of ruining her birthday, but that''s impossible I didn''t even know it was her birthday!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says "Dam!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do lesbians like to camp? In a femi-nest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t understand why Obama had to give speeches behind bulletproof glass, I mean he''s black and all but I doubt he would have shot anyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a rich Iraqi say at a bar mitzvah? Mosul Toff!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the worst Israeli senior citizens resort? Jewrassic Park', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a four letter word pertaining to females ending in -unt? Aunt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Motherly Pride Two mothers were talking about their sons. The first said, "My son is such a saint. He works hard, doesn''t smoke, and he hasn''t so much as looked at a woman in over two years." The other woman said, "Well, my son is a saint himself. Not only has he not looked at a woman in over three years, but he hasn''t touched a drop of liquor in all that time." "My word," the first mother said. "You must be so proud." "I am," the second mother replied. "And when he''s paroled next month, I''m going to throw him a big party."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 16 year old blonde is dinning with her parents Blonde: Oh by the way Im pregnant Parents (simultaneously): Youre WHAT!?! Blonde: Geez relax and eat a chill pill, Im not even sure its mine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One chemist tells his colleague: "Dude, I created a superconductive alloy out of Potassium, Nobelium and Tungsten!! I''m going to make millions off of it!" The other chemist, jealous, says with a sigh,"Yes, I KNoW."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the fastest thing on land? Stevie Wonder''s speedboat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was sitting at the table with his two daughters Petal and Fridge. Petal said, "Dad, why is my name Petal?" Her dad answered, "Because a flower petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Then Fridge said, "HUURRGRRUWAHGUWAAAAAH!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pencil isnt prone to making Freudian Slips but my penis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife hangs up after about a half-hour on the phone A wife hangs up after about a half-hour on the phone. The husband is surprised, "Wow, that was quick - usually you girls are at it for two hours at least!" "Yeah, well, it was a wrong number."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Big explosion at the cheese factory earlier.... There was de brie everywhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a new Indian open on a boat on the canal round corner from my house... ...It''s called the Onion Barge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandpa has the heart of a lion... And a lifetime ban from the local zoo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandma and I were face timing with a bad connection So she says, "hold on, let me open the door to let some WiFi''s in." True stories can be jokes too..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a movie about premature ejaculation Coming Soon, now in theaters. EDIT: Just let me try again changing a couple of words EDIT 2: I swear this is the first time that this has happened', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Donald Trump and Gordon Ramsay have in common? They both have a cabinet full of potatoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think my wife has a blind fetish... Last night she said she doesn''t think we should see each other anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s it called when you cut off Leonardo DiCaprio''s head DiCapritation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like military puns Generally, they''re very funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a bar... And a table... then a chair...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most women would love to wake up on their birthday to the smell of fresh coffee, a nice breakfast, flowers and oral But not my Sister.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone stole my mood ring... I''m not sure how I feel about that....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many people say a diploma is just a piece of paper. I as an educated person beg to differ It''s a piece of cardboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To some people, the words "Do Not Touch" leave them terrified Especially when it''s written in Braille.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate those cocky Russian Nesting dolls They are always full of themselves', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Volkswagon were pretty dumb to name one of their cars ''Golf'' Why name a car after a slow and boring sport where the hardest part is driving', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the lovelorn college professor? He always put the course before the heart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A video of a groundbreaking bowler goes viral He still had to pay to fix the bowling lane though', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the disco: "So whats a cute girl like you doing all by herself?" "I had to fart"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Matt get a Ticket? He''s a speed Damon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the Lord said onto John... "Come forth and you shall receive eternal life" But John came fifth, and got a toaster...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish swim into a concrete wall One turns to the other and says, "Dam!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two muffins are standing in an oven Two muffins are standing in an oven, One turns to the other and says; "Boy, sure is hot in here." To which the other one replies; "OH MY GOD! A TALKING MUFFIN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit is a really green community, ...considering all the recycled content on here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Mexican Midget? A paragraph because he''s too short to be an ese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call beautiful people in india ? Tourist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, violets are blue. When it comes to flower colours, the person who made this has no clue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black guy wakes up from a coma He asks what happened. The nurse says "You blacked out"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man named Eric Cole... ... discovered that there was a direct correlation between the amount of mayonnaise on his cabbage salad and how good it tastes. He''s calling this correlation Cole''s Law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The girl i am dating, slapped me and told me to fuck off. Told her she was a gold-digger.. Apparently, that''s not a good way to call someone who work in mines, digging gold.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Go Karting with a Muslim coworker Muslim coworker: We should organise a go karting day out, I went on the weekend and it was really fun! Dan: That''s a good but isn''t it dangerous? Jack: As long as you don''t go in Ram-a-dan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump is our first POSOTUS Peice Of Shit Of The United States.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently a new casino opened in Tokyo (Japan)... It is called "Pokermon Go"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with 2 extra testicles removed them himself with a knife without anaesthesia Doing that takes some balls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a hamburger was grilled in space? It''s a little meteor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Expensive perfume A young and beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling like expensive perfume. She turns to the old Italian woman on the elevator with her and says arrogantly, "Giorgio - Beverly Hills, $100 an ounce!" Another young and beautiful woman gets on the elevator and also smells of very expensive perfume. She arrogantly turns to the old Italian woman and says, "Chanel No. 5, $150 an ounce!" About three floors later, the old Italian woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, looks both beautiful women in the eye, turns, bends over, and farts. "Broccoli - 49 cents a pound."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not cumin! Said Caraway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve done jail time for my love of fruit.. I''m a convicted grapist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tobacco companies kill their best customers And condom companies kill their future customers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why wouldn''t the lobster share his toys? Because he was... shellfish. hahahaha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sandwich and a kit Kat walk into a bar at 9-31..... ....barman says "I''m sorry, we don''t serve snacks after 9pm"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Forrest Gump''s password? 1forrest1', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman - "Which book has helped you most in your life?" The woman replied - "My husband''s cheque book !!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the company fire all of its Liberal employees and hire a bunch of illegal immigrants and Muslim refugees? The illegal immigrants and Muslim refugees actually came to work while all the Liberals shirked work to go hold signs and shout at people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was asked how I view lesbian relationships Apparently ''in HD'' isn''t the correct answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shortest joke a software developer can tell: Ill be ready soon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 19999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you can get with 57 000? A home for a refugee. Or a shit ton of beer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a couple gets into bed As a couple gets into bed, the husband starts to rub and kiss his wife. She turns over and says, "I''m sorry, honey. I''ve got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The husband sadly turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife. "Do you have a dentist appointment, too?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Final arrangements... A woman from New York was getting her affairs in order. She wrote her will and made her final arrangements. As part of these arrangements she met with her rabbi to talk about what type of funeral service she wanted. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Bloomindgales. "Bloomingdales!" the rabbi said. "Why Bloomingdales?" "That way, I am guaranteed to have my daughters visit me at least twice a week."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Matthew McConaughey set to guest edit Breibart news next week Alt-Right Alt-Right Alt-Right', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A detective shows up at a crime scene A bakery has been broken into. After some investigation, a police officer checks up on the detective. The officer asks, "How''s the investigation going?" "Not good. Hundreds of dollars worth of quality pastries have been stolen." said the detective. "I heard that there''s been a lot of thieves running around town lately." said the officer. "Sure has." the detective said. "But this one takes the cake."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What place is cleaner when Israeli Tourists get out than when they get in? A Hotel Room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack,"Our relationship is over." Jane,"Our relationship is what? Over."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hand me downs Apparently not the right way to ask the wife to hand me our disabled baby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s this I hear about a new Muslim band?? Is this something kind of explosive death metal!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a joke about paper? Never mind. It''s tearable', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s favorite word in Sign Language ddfffffddffddfffddffddddfffff', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Hitler and Trump? The mustache.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: whoever answers ............. Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. One boy throws his bag out the window. Teacher: who just threw that?! Boy: Me! Im going home now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom won''t let me eat while using her laptop anymore... Because when she caught me stroganoff I dropped my pennes on the keyboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The electromagnetic wave arrived at the hotel, when the hotelier asks... "Do you have any baggage to check in?" - "No, I''m traveling light."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I fell asleep at a party I fell asleep at a party the other night and someone put a teabag in my mouth. I went fuckin mental. No one treats me like a mug', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My gay friend really despises of fruit He cannot stand the sight of a mango.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The different between Donald Trump and Hitler If anybody can think of one! Pm me and I''ll write it in this little space here -----> [ ]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my shrink what we could work on to deal with my grandma''s passing. She said mourning would help. I said, "No thanks, I''m married."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a blonde woman in a swimsuit are stranded on a deserted island. The woman asks the man, "When was the last time you had a smoke?", she then unzips her swimsuit a little and pulls out a cigar, the man replies, "Thank you", and takes the cigar. Soon after, the woman asks the man, "When was the last time you had a drink?", she then unzips her swimsuit halfway down and pulls out a can of beer, the man replies, "Thank you my dear", and takes the can of beer. When the man had finished the beer, the woman unzips her swimsuit nearly all the way down and asks the man, "When was the last time you played around?" The man replied, "You wouldn''t have a set of golf clubs in there would you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lot of folks are concerned that Trump is president given the status of minorities. But don''t forget: Orange be the new black, baby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the diamond depressed? He had been under a lot of pressure lately.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GNU/Linux can''t run Photoshop.. unless you offer it WINE. Else you will remain stuck with a GIMPed system.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally got the "why did the chicken cross the road" joke The chicken dies and goes to the other side... it took me 19 years to get that joke...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What so you call an actor who paid of his house Mortgage freeman (i know its bad)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We need immigrants to do jobs that Americans don''t want to do... As two thirds of Trump''s wife are immigrants', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got asked why I don''t have a girlfriend... "Don''t need one" I replied "My bank account goes down on me everyday"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pirate walks into a bar Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. Bartender says "Hey Mr. Pirate, ya know you have a steering wheel in your pants?" Pirate says "Yarrrrr, it''s driving me nuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We never saw it coming. Psychiatrist: You have paranoid schizophrenia. Patient: Who! Me or me?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife and husband have bought condoms with different flavours. - Darling, I will turn off the light, put one on and you guess the flavour. As soon as he turns off the light, she takes it in the mouth and says: - Gorgonzola! - Wait, it is not on yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to give myself a sex change... ...but I couldn''t pull it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? He was outstanding in his field.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a tiny penis and a joke? My date didn''t laugh at my jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Italian that died? He pasta way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why cant you play cards on a rowboat? Because you''re sitting on the deck...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I''ve never had a garbanzo bean on my face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FOUND Ladys purse left in my car while parked. A classified ad in the paper: FOUND Ladys purse left in my car while parked. The owner can have same by paying for this ad. If she will explain to my wife how the purse got in my car, I will pay for the ad. Phone 555-xxx-7610.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A programmer goes shopping A room mate asked his friend who is a programmer to go shopping. "hey, can you buy a bottle of milk? Oh and if they have eggs, buy 12" So the programmer went shopping. When he got back, he bought 12 bottle of milk and his room mate asked "why the heck did you bought 12 bottle of milk?!" The programmer responded. "they have eggs"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Miss France just won Miss Universe The French finally won something.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: Hi, how are you? Patient: I''m well thanks. Doctor: Then get the fuck out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Carrie Fisher cross the road? She didn''t... She''s dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A close friend of mine asked me "What do you look for in a girl?" And I said "My dick, and if it''s not there then that''s gonna change."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a tumultuous couple of weeks in the spotlight and under the microscope, president Trump flies to New York to spend a night with his wife. As he is about to walk into the penthouse, he gets a call from Priebus. "Mr President", he says, "what should we do about the abortion bill" Trump, annoyed especially about the timing barks back "who gives a shit? Just fucking pay it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People don''t realize Trump is the healthiest president in our history. He''s been training his whole life to run the aryan race.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a bag of coke and a toddler Eric Clapton wouldn''t let a bag of coke fall out a window', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a hormone? Don''t pay her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and his wife are on a beach... NSFW A husband an his wife are on a date at the beach. It''s mid afternoon an him and his wife are both sun bathing. His wife casually turns on her stomach and asks "can you rub some sunscreen on my back?" He then grabs the bottle and gets on top of his wife. "Right on your back?" He asks, and she nods slightly. "What''s taking so long?" She asks, and he replies, "it''s coming honey, just rubbing my self down first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man''s adoptive daughter begins to get sexually attracted to her father... A man''s adoptive daughter begins to get sexually attracted to her father. She starts to advance on him slowly, starting with slightly skimpier clothing, and slowly moving on to blatant flirting and leaving nudes around the house. One day, the father is climbing up the stairs when he hears a strange noise. Under further investigation, it seemed like the noise was coming from his daughter''s room. He opened the door to find his daughter naked on the bed, pleasuring herself. She looks at him, only mildly startled, and continues to touch herself. "Please fuck me, Dad. I''m so horny." She sits up and spreads her legs. Her father, having been resisting temptation for months, finally caves. He rushes over and shoves her down back onto the bed. He undos his belt, unzips his pants, and leans in to whisper seductively: "Hi horny, I''m Dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I grow up and have kids... I think I will stay a virgin to set a good example.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stop it with the 9/11 jokes, my dad died in 9/11 His last words were "Allahu Akbar"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump''s wives were immigrants. Proving again that immigrants will do jobs Americans won''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy runs out of gasoline. Nearest gas station in 20 miles out, so he unzips and fills up with pee. Cop driving by stops him and asks is this normal? nope its super. .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you ever see a crow as roadkill? They always have another crow as a lookout saying "car, car, car"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking news...Justin Trudeau just announced a plan to build a wall between the US and Canada, with the US paying for the fence. ...yeah just as fucking stupid as as it sounds:(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend is like the square root of -100 A perfect 10, but completely imaginary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What gets wetter the more it dries? "What?", says the interrogation suspect. "Not this."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I said to my girlfriend that she would look sexier with her hairback Apparently thats an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('North Korea bans sarcasm What a great idea!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a little girl got lost in the woods, and she sees an owl, and asks it: ''Do you know where my mother is?'' and the owl responds, ''Why the hell would I know where your mother is? Are you stupid? And why are you fairy tale children always getting lost in forests and hallucinating about animals that can talk?'' And then the owl swooped down and ripped the little girls face off and ate her eyeballs. And the the owl hooted. Who-Who.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A journalisy doing an article about life in prison He asks inmates about their daily routine Prisoner1: i wake up eat,exercice, do laundry and take a shower Prisoner2: i wake up read a book eat and after that i do laundry Prisoner3: i wake up take a shower, eat and take a walk. The journalist then asks him, dont you do laundry like the others? Prisoner3 smiling : no silly, im laundry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a difficult problem in chemistry? A chemystery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t we letting Islamic people get off at airports? I thought we wanted to keep them off our planes, not on them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just got back from Chernobyl And boy are my legs arms!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did OSHA say about this joke? NSFW', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sodium ion went to rob a bank. It was charged, without a doubt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The story of a man and his pregnant wife My wife is prego, but we like to get kinky anyway. One night things begin to get particularly saucy - I''m sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights. It''s red everywhere and she''s obviously not on her period, I look up at her glassy, jarred facial expression. Worried, I rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital, she''s still bleeding. By the time we get there she''s not bleeding much more but all color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent, almost in a vegetative state. We storm into the emergency room and explain everything to the nearest doctor. The doctor replies, "Sorry, there is nothing we can do." "WHY THE FUCK NOT??" I exclaim. "We don''t operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Kool-aid man say about Donald Trump''s proposal? OH Yeaaaaaaa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and sticky? A stick. I wood''ve thought of something more original, but I tree-ly can''t be bothered, so here you go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman gets on a bus with her baby The bus driver says: "That''s the ugliest baby that I''ve ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I''ll hold your monkey for you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what the worst part is about dating a Japanese girl? If I ever decide to break up with her I will have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. Only a fraction of people will find this funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do all pharaohs have in common? Toot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I went to the protest The protesters aren''t going to mace themselves', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but how in the hell did they get in there?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A traveling companion. A guy walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm and orders, "I''ll have a pint, please. And one for the road."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I" Student: I is the.... Teacher: Stop! Never put ''is'' after an "I". Always put ''am'' after an "I". Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How dare you say I''m dumb! Would a dummy get a ''A'' on there IQ test? Hmm?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think these protesters are sending the wrong message... because they keep telling me to Love Trump''s Hate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of the most important skill my parents taught me is... How to tell what is junk mail and real mail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump says "The less immigrants we let into our country the better!" Pence, correcting Trump, says "The Fewer" Trump says "Whoa Mike don''t call me that just yet"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If there''s a sock on my doorknob... It means I''m having sex with the other one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A country that shares borderlines with 10 other countries cannot be entered because it is made of limits', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike Rowe Penis Women have told me I have a Mike Rowe penis. I guess it must be because they think it''s pretty strong and does dirty jobs... but I think it''s a little small myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys sit at a bar... One says to the other "I''ve got really bad news." "What is it?", the friend replies. "I''m HIV positive". "Really?!, that''s terrible. Is there anything I can do?". "Yea, can you tell your wife as soon as you get home".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The orphanage i run, burned down today with the lives of sixty children Thank fuck i don''t have to tell their parents ....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in my day we used to only have chalkboards. The new whiteboards they use are Remarkable', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I rather have a bottle of soda for President than Donald Trump. This way, we could truly have a Liter of the Free World.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Next time somebody calls your home phone... Say "Can I call you back? I''m driving."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked me, which is worse, ignorance or apathy? I told him, "I don''t know, and I don''t care."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All of these reposts are like kids with cancer They never get old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is better a stool or a box to stand on? You stand on a stool, though I prefer the ladder', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I called the ASPCA hotline to tell them I''d just found six Badgers in a suitcase by the side of the road "Are they moving?" asked the operator "Not sure" I replied "But that would explain the suitcase"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pasteurize: Too far to see.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Pokemon who is trying to quit smoking? Vaporeon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Going to work My boss told me yesterday, Dont dress for the job you have, dress for the job you want. But when I turned up at the office today in Ghostbusters gear, the bastard said I was fired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do alcoholics and necropheliacs have in common? They both love to crack open a cold one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dog went to a telegram office Took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, "There are only nine words here. You could send another ''Woof'' for the same price." The dog replied, "but that would make no sense at all!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the beginning there was nothing. God said, ''Let there be light!'' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats more offensive than black face? Orange face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn''t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his cell phone and calls emergency services. He gasps to the operator, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies, "Take it easy. I can help. First, let''s make sure he''s dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Favorite math topics of Karma Whores Multiplication and derivatives', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Photons aren''t Catholic. No mass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s like we''re living in a video game... "President Evil"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me I look "uncool" with a bike helmet on.. Well you know I''d rather look uncool than fall and split my head open during sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary Tyler Moore died this week. She didn''t make it after all...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old friends are camping. [nsfw] In bed, in the dark : "Are you jerking off? -Yeah. -Would you mind jacking your own dick?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns... But I soon realized that toucan play at that game', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It''s an obscure number. You''ve probably never heard of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic... But if I''m gonna have sex, it''s going to be on my own Accord.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a cocaine joke, but now I can''t find it It makes me really mad because I had it all lined up', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t communism work in a school enviroment? Because everyone would get the same Marx.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was appalled to learn about Hitler''s uprising. Anne Frankly, I did Nazi that coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Got in a fight with my boner this morning; Don''t worry i beat it single handedly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Courtney Love and a porcupine? A porcupines needle won''t give you AIDS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a horse with a horn and no balls? A Eunuchorn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the farmer start a punk rock band? He was tired of Haulin'' Oats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Colonel Sanders keep his eleven herbs and spices a secret? Because he was ashamed of them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Britney Spears addicted to the cocaine? Because Kevin fed her lines', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redditors are like alchemists. They try to turn their nonsense into gold.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the chef fired from the restaurant? He was caught cooking the books', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Bill Clinton and Donald Trump? Bill fucked fewer people in the Oval Office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Courtney Love and the American flag? It''s not proper to piss on the American flag', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? 1 less drunk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The weather forecast is looking pretty bad over in Germany. There''s a high chance of heil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexicans are upset over Trump''s wall. A lot of Mexicans are upset over Trump''s planned wall. I hope they get over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Jew and a pizza. Pizza can have pepperoni, Jews can''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the Australian guy that was dancing with my computer? He was waltzing my tilde.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Nazi cetacean? Adolfin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife bought a new plant for for the house. I didn''t like it at first... ...but it''s starting to grow on me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbor caught me peeing on his lawn after a snow storm. Don''t tell me not to pee on your lawn. This is my lawn, see, it''s got my name on it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it so loud in Costco? Everything comes in high volumes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was bored with my life, and wanted to change something. I changed my mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend asked me, "Where''s my book of opera puns?" I said, "It''s overture house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Jewish man is dying at home in bed. His entire family is gathered around him. Sarah, the man calls for his wife... Im here dear. And the kids? We are all here too dad. And the grandchildren? We are all here. Well, if you are all here then why is the light in the kitchen turned on?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about trumps wall? I can''t tell you, you might not get over it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter how hard you push the envelope It still remains stationery', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once dreamed that I fell down a flight of stairs. I was so relieved when I woke up safely in the hospital.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican drug lord El Chapo has been extradited to the United States... It''s still unclear which cabinet post he''ll be appointed to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Will glass coffins be popular in future? Remains to be seen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The person who made the shovel should receive an award It was groundbreaking work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking down the street the other day and I see a man in a zoot suit checking the time on his pocket watch. I go up to him and I say, "hey, did you just come out of a time machine or something?" Hey says, "no, that''s just the wind chill, it only makes it feel like we''re in the 20''s."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say "Rise Up Lights" out loud You just said "Razor Blades" in an Australian accent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I took a practice test on photons today... It didn''t matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Hanlon''s razor, Occam''s razor, Poe''s Law and Godwin''s Law each have in common? The Donald Trump presidency.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Cant Teach an Old Dog to Fly A woman called our airline customer-service desk asking if she could take her dog on board. Sure, I said, as long as you provide your own kennel. I further explained that the kennel needed to be large enough for the dog to stand up, sit down, turn around, and roll over. The customer was flummoxed: Ill never be able to teach him all of that by tomorrow!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit is really a green community, considering all the recycled content on here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a new passion yesterday pairing socks. I guess I just enjoy bringing sole mates together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no cats on mars? Curiosity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the PowerPoint cross the road? To get to the other slide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is a lot like chess You''ve always got to be thinking two steps ahead. And most people want to be white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Even if they all unite against Trump, those seven countries won''t get off the list A seven nation army couldn''t hold Trump back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock...... You: Who''s there? .... Me: Better eat up...... You:.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rumour has it Eminem has converted to Islam. From now on, he will call himself "Muslim Shady."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My daughter just told me she''s infertile. "That''s a great joke," I said. "I can''t wait to tell it to my grandchildren."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the butter on toast? I can''t tell you, you might spread it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The propellor of a plane is actually a giant fan for the pilot When the fan stops, you can actually see the pilot start sweating', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will track you down... You have my Word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A psychiatrist was conducting group therapy with four young mothers and their small children... A psychiatrist was conducting group therapy with four young mothers and their small children. "You all have obsessions," the doctor observed. To the 1st mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You''ve even named your daughter Candy." He looks to the 2nd mother, "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child''s name, Penny." He looks to the 3rd mother. "Your obsession is alcohol. This manifests itself in your child''s name, Brandy." At this point, the 4th mother gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and says... "Come on, Dick, we''re leaving!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Shakers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Shakers can''t screw', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The day after Thanksgiving is often the biggest capitalist/materialistic shopping day every year. I''m protesting it this year, and had to think of the movement''s slogan... Black Fridays Matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An atheist is walking alone in the woods When a bear appears and starts running towards the man. The man closes his eyes and screams "Oh God help me". He opens his eyes again and the bear is standing still with his paws only inches from his face, the bear is not moving at all, almost like time stood still. A loud voice is heard from the sky. - God: Why are you calling on me now? You never believed in me before. - Man: Help me this bear is going to eat me. - God: Sorry I can not help you I only help Christian''s. - Man: Well, make me a Christian then. - God: You do not have enough faith to be a Christian, even this bear has more faith than you. - Man: Please, can you at least turn the bear into a Christian? Suddenly the bear starts to move again. The bear lowers both of its paws towards it''s chest and puts them together. The man can hear the bear say under it''s breath "Dear God thank you for this food you have provided for me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many homeless people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Homeless people can''t have light bulbs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is definition of indefinitely? When your balls are touching her ass, you are in-definatlly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked Kellyanne Conway for her email And she said "oh you mean my alternative fax?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nursery school teacher says to her class, "Who can use the word ''definitely'' in a sentence?" First a little girl says, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher says, "Sorry, Amy, but the sky can sometimes be gray, or black." A second little boy says,"Trees are definitely green." "Sorry, but in the autumn, the trees are brown." Then little Johnny from the back of the class stands up and asks, "Does a fart have lumps?" The teacher looks horrified and says, "Johnny! Of course not!!!" "OK...then I DEFINITELY just shit my pants!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m going to post a joke I hope it dosen''t get [deleted]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do female geologists do as a side job? Prostitution. They quite enjoy studying hard things!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A masochist and a sadist are doing their thing& The masochist says: "Hit me" and the sadist answers: "no&"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think babysitting was just a job teenagers did to make a quick buck Then I saw how much Kellyanne Conway makes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the math book say to the literature book? You''re so full of great stories, I''m just filled with problems', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my pies... Still warm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A happy 80 year old man goes to see his doctor Doctor: Why are you so happy? Old Man: My 19 year old wife is pregnant! Can you believe it?! Doctor: Wow, that great news! You know, I have a story to tell you. Old Man: Go ahead Doctor: I once had a friend. He would go hunting every weekend. One day he forgot to bring his gun. He brought his umbrella instead. Old Man: Ok... Doctor: He then saw a bear. Not knowing what to do, he opened the umbrella, and poof, the bear died. Old Man: How''s that possible? You can''t kill a bear with an umbrella Doctor: Exactly. Somebody else must''ve shot the bear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that the Beatles had to change the lyrics to Hello Goodbye because it was too "british". The original was "Oi Mate Piss Off"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the hardest part about your wife telling you she has AIDS? Acting surprised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man dies and goes to heaven He sees a bunch of clocks on the wall and wonders why they''re there. So he goes to ask Jesus and Jesus says "Those are lie clocks, they represent the amount of times someone has lied while they''re on earth", Jesus then shows him a clock that has only ticked one second and states "See, this is Mother Teresa''s lie clock, indicating see has only lied once". Interested the man asks where Donald Trump''s "lie clock" is, Jesus says, "Unfortunately it had to be disabled, Einstein was getting upset that the hands were moving faster than the speed of light".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say when you see a Nazi trip and fall? "Are you Alt-right?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does one go from being a doctor to an Uber driver? They move to America.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A monk is allowed to say only two words every year Per his oath of silence, a monk is only allowed to say two words every year. After his first year, he comes before the head abbot to speak his two words. "Better Food." The head abbot understands and obliges the monk, hiring a new chef and improving the food quality at the monastery. A year later, the monk appears to speak his next two words. "Warmer Blankets." The head abbot gets right on it and purchases new blankets for the monk. The next year, the monk appears once again for his annual two words. "I quit." The head abbot replies, "Well good, all you''ve done since you got here is complain."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Donald Trumps favorite basketball player? John Wall Get it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The frequency of sexual activity of senior males. The frequency of sexual activity of senior males depends on where they were born. Statistics just released from Statistics Canada and The United Nations B.O.H. Team, reveal that: North American, Australian, New Zealanders and British men between 60 and 80 years of age, will on average, have sex two to three times per week, (and a small number a lot more), whereas Japanese men, in exactly the same age group, will have sex only once or twice per year if they are lucky. This has come as very upsetting news to both me and most of my buddies at the golf club, as none of us had any idea that we were Japanese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? I was hoping you would just upvote.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Fifth Harmony was unable to perform at the NHL All Star... They can still have an option to work from home via satellite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Bill Clinton say when asked why Hillary lost? "Not sure, she never used to go down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the letters A through Y hate the Jews? Because they were Not Z.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL the current Russian President once nearly placed a bomb in a friendly naval vessel. Wait, am I Putin this in the wrong sub?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish man? Zero.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t computers have any brothers? They are all trans-sisters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus at a restaurant in Heaven... "Holy cow!" "Yes, Lord. I am both you server and your steak. How would you like me cooked?" "Well done, my good and faithful sirloin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Christian is out on the ocean when his boat capsizes... He immediately starts praying. After half an hour a boat pulls up. "Hey! Need some help?" "No thanks! God will save me!" So the boat speeds off. After another hour another boat pulls up. "Hey there! Need any help?" "No thanks! God will save me!" So the boat speeds off. After a grueling two hours treading water, a third boat pulls up. "You need some help?" "No thanks! God will save me!" So the third boat moves along. Hours pass. Too tired to tread water anymore, the Christian sinks and drowns. Standing at the gates to heaven, God shows up to let him in. "God! Why didn''t you save me?!" God just shakes his head, "I sent you three damn boats! What more do you want?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of ships can''t go in salt water? Snail-boats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Muslim refugees: just pretend to be Christian. That''s what most Christians do anyways.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a white duck? A quacker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man gets pulled over for speeding... And he''s worried about what''s going to happen, as he''s close to losing his licence. The officer walks up and before he can say anything the guy says, ''Hey are you out here selling tickets again for the policemans ball?'' The officer respond ''Policemen don''t have balls''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife asks why I bring my ccw to church... Because you can never predict when there will be a mass shooting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar with his dog A man walks into a bar with his dog and orders two glasses of whiskey. He proposes a toast and both he and his dog empty their glasses. The girl behind the bar is surprised and asks: ''Can your dog perform other tricks?''. ''But of course'', the man answers, ''he can even gratify a woman''. Anxious to know more the girl leads the man and the dog into a little room above the bar. She undresses and full of expectation she lies down on the bed. The dog looks at her and does nothing, and the man then shouts to the dog, ''OK. Just ONE more time, let me show you how it''s done".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Horse walks into a bar... ..Barman: "Why the long face?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Swallow is a bird or a fish? It''s an order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anyone care for a limerick? There once was a man from Nantucket Who wanted to vacation in Phuket But changed his mind On where to unwind Because he''d rather not shit in a bucket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does NASCAR really stand for? Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and her twin were standing next to each other in the kitchen Well, long story short, I grabbed the wrong butt and my brother in law was not amused', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cleaning ladies: The new craze that''s sweeping the nation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the opposite of critical thinking? Critical theory.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Young Brunette Goes into the Doctor''s Office A young brunette goes into the doctor''s office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible" says the doctor, "show me". She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so it goes on. The doctor says, "You''re not really a brunette are you? You''re really a blonde". She says "Yes, doctor". "I thought so." the doctor says, then continues: "Your finger is broken".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Japanese man walks into a gun store... He asks the cashier, "Do you have any Rugers?" "Of course we do," says the cashier, and he dashes back into the stockroom. 5 minutes later he returns with one of each gun on Ruger''s entire product line. Rifles, shotguns, pistols, all brand-new, still coated in grease from the factory. "Which one would you like to try?" the cashier asks. The Japanese man looks over the row of 30 guns placed in front of him. After a moment, he turns back to the cashier and says, "None of them." "None?" the cashier asks incredulously. "Sir, this is every type of gun Ruger makes! Why would you ask to see the Rugers if you weren''t interested in any of them?" The Japanese man calmly replies, "Obviousry you''re not famiriar with antique German weaponry of the Weimar era. Very werru, I wirru rook for a Ruger somewhere eresu!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Obama wants to talk Michelle Obama into an open marriage Michelle: Barry, where is this coming from? This is very sudden! Our marriage has been very happy even under all the stress of this presidency. Obama: I''ve been in the closet about this for a while, but I have such a man crush for Diamond Joe. I want to have a relationship with him too. But don''t worry, I will love you. Michelle: This is very sudden. What would it even look like? Obama: Well, I don''t know. We would still spend a lot of time together. But we could also have dank threesomes. And smoke plenty of weed. Lots of salt about how this election played out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What part of your hand is the most salty? The NaCls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Its best to put your phone on some rice when its wet Asian people will come at night and fix it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard McDonalds is really bad for you. That why I only eat at Burger king.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an ill Saudi Arabian? Sikh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving with his wife and a small child when a cop pulls them over. A man is driving with his wife and a small child. A cop pulls them over and makes the man take a breathalyzer test. See, the cop says, you are drunk. The man protests that the breathalyzer must be broken and invites the cop to test his wife. She also registers as drunk. Exasperated, the man invites the cop to test his child. When the child registers drunk as well, the cop shrugs, says, Yes, perhaps it is broken, and sends them on their way. As they drive off, the man turns to his wife and says, See, I told you it wouldnt hurt to give the kid a couple of shots of vodka.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Communism jokes are not funny Unless everyone gets them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between your mom and a bowling ball? Your mom can''t fit in a bowling ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 cactuses are talking to each other One of them asks the other, "Hey, do you know how to speak the human language?" To which he responds, "yeah it''s easy, they always say ouch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a wine loving horse? Chardon-neigh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i don''t think women should stay in the kitchen... i mean, how are they supposed to clean the rest of the house from there?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Muslim enters the United States Oh sorry thought it was still 2016.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what the arch enemies of skinheads are? Blackheads.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All pro athletes are bilingual They speak English and profanity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Tigger doing in the toilet? Looking for Pooh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I returned from court to see ''Welcome home dad'' hanging over the foyer.. It was a suspended sentence', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muslims in the U.S.A [Removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a Chinese friend with really bad internet His name is Hai Ping', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the scarecrow receive an award? It was outstanding in his field.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tip: if you don''t want comedians weighing in on politics.... ...don''t elect a joke. (Credit to Bo Burnham)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what do you all think of the new House of Cards? I have to say that whole plot twist with Trump becoming the new president was quite unexpected.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend overdosed on Tofu The coroner called it a Soysoning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Chicago Policemen does it take to crack an egg? None. It fell down the stairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to a $5 lady of the night... ... and he gets crabs. So the next day, he goes back to complain. And the woman says, "Hey, it was only $5. What did you expect, lobster?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tied a rope and swallowed it I shit you knot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Hispanic radio station? Mixed Signals', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If pronouncing your b''s like v''s makes you sound Russian... Then *soviet!*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get what you guys are saying about how Mexicans hate Trump... ... Every Mexican I see is calling him a peachy cool arrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My rich uncle just passed away so I recently came into some money But now the bills are all stuck together', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A English teacher says to a African student.. "okay you''re doing really good with your English, I would like you to use the word dandelion in a sentence" the student replies "ohh that is easy, The giraffe, is bigger, dan de lion"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate people who use the wrong words in a sentence and don''t correct themselves They sometimes should have the humidity to admit it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be up to date with memes... then I took an arrow to the knee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t you buy underwear from Ukraine? Because Chernobyl (cher-knob-el) fallout.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s always I before E Except when you run a feisty heist on a weird beige foreign neighbor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a man with a several rabbits on his head today... When I inquired as to why he had rabbits on his head, he simply stated "From a distance they look like hares"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do men sound like they''re having an orgasm when they''re lifting weights? And why is my father lifting weights in the bathroom?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('McDonalds is releasing a new Japanese fish sandwich. It will be called The Real Mc Koi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would cauliflower... ...but I don''t have its number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just found out I was dating a commie Guess I should''ve noticed the red flags earlier', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the sound of Trump''s head hitting the Liberty Bell? Dunnnnnnng', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Letter to a madman Inside a hospice, a madman approaches the others with a blank paper, examining it with attention. The other crazy people can not resist curiosity and ask: _ What is it? The crazy one with the letter, responds _ A letter from my brother Even for the other crazy people, that was too absurd. _ But the letter is blank. The madman responds serenely _ We do not talk anymore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('having sex for pleasure Apart from humans, the only creature that has sex for pleasure is the dolphin. I had to shag a lot of animals to find that out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Dee Snider say he wanted for Christmas? I WANNA ROCK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when a nail is driven through the canvas of a piece of artwork? A ''pain''-ting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do housewives do on Saturday nights? They go Sam''s Clubbing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college student is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog. He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He saves the girl''s life, but the pit bull is killed in the process. A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says: "You are a hero, tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers: "Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl". The man says: - "But I am not a New Yorker!" "Oh ,then it will say in newspapers in the morning: ''Brave American saves life of little girl''", the policeman answers. "But I am not an American!", says the man. "Oh, what are you then?" The man says: - "I am a Saudi !" The next day the newspapers says: "Islamic extremist kills innocent American dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband: "I have good news and bad news" Wife: "Tell me the bad news first." Husband: "The washing machine broke." Wife: "And the good news?" Husband: "The dogs are clean."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandmother died stoned. She was showing too much leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I work in construction... We don''t have side pieces, we have back hoes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to movies with her newborn son. The kid starts crying and keeps crying for 10-15 minutes. Frustrated, a man screams :" damnit woman, put a boob in the kid''s mouth. " Angered by the remark, the woman''s husband stands up and starts lecturing the guy in the dark about how he is a awful human being and doesn''t know how to behave with woman. The man screams again :" put one in his mouth too. "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath. "Nurse,"'' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don''t know, Sir. I''m only here to wash your upper body and feet." He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?" Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other. She looks very closely and says, "There''s nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine." The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very closely: Are - my - test - results - back?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just enlisted my kids into the Navy. Or as the wife calls it, masturbated in the shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant prostitute visits her Doctor... The Doctor asks, "do you know who the father is?" The prostitute replies, "if you ate a can of beans, would you know which one made you fart?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what Mexicans think about Trump''s wall? Who cares, they''ll get over it..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just came to a conclusion Best wank of my life', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a tight fitting bra? A boobie trap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mathematician walks into a pizza bar and orders one pi He receives two', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my Thanksgiving turkey like I like my own ass On the dining room table, with my family gathered round, and with my grandmum''s fists in it pulling out the stuffing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never trust a stairwell. Every time you turn around, it''s a new story!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is life? Better with drugs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Trump deports all the Mexicans Who''s going to build the wall?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks his father A boy asks his father: Where''s the potato peeler? Father: In the supermarket', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Conservatives keep telling me to find Jesus How am I supposed to find him if they want him sent back to mexico and want a wall to keep him out?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five year old granddaughter to me. Her: Knock, Knock. Me: Who''s there? Her: Interrupting cow. Me: Interrp.... Her MOO, MOO', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The 10 minutes joke One morning, a girl was taking a shower with her mom. She asked, "Mommy, Mommy, what are those?" The Mom says "Those are titties, dear." "When will I get those?" the girl asks. "When you''re older." the Mom says. The next morning, the girl is taking a shower with her dad. "Daddy, Daddy, what''s that?" she asks "That''s a penis, dear." he replies "When will I get that?" she asks "In ten minutes when your mom goes to work." [I remember hearing this in high school and had to share]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my wife thinks I''m really annoying... but we tried anal for the first time the other day so now I''m really a pain in her ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you never see a black person with Down Syndrome? God doesn''t punish anyone twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor and his wife were sun A doctor and his wife were sunbathing on a beach when a well-endowed, beautiful, young, blonde woman in a tight-fitting bikini strolled passed. The woman looked at the doctor, smiled seductively, and said in a very sexy voice, "Hi there handsome. How are you doing?" before wiggling her backside and walking off. "Who was that?" demanded the doctor''s wife. "Just a woman I met professionally," replied the doctor. "Oh yeah?" snarled his wife, "In whose profession? Yours or hers?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a small knife used for killing gorillas? A harambit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wouldn''t bother making a joke about an infinite line No point.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s cool how today everyone is applauding patriots for standing up for human rights... ...and by next Sunday everyone will be back to hating the Patriots again', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Donald Trump the rarest form (real life incartination) of pepe? Because it can be witnessed only once in a *Melania*-um.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a female scientist? A scientits', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally got one over. The other day, Louise and I got into some petty argument. (I say it was petty. She would have said it was Armageddon.) As is our nature, neither of us would admit the possibility that we might be in error. To her credit, Louise finally said, ''Look. I''ll tell you what. I''ll admit I''m wrong if you admit I was right.'' ''Fine.'' I said. She took a deep breath, looked me in the eye and said, ''I''m wrong.'' I grinned and replied, ''You''re right.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mechanical Engineer NSFW Mechanical Engineer''s wife Delivers a baby.. Wife Sends SMS to her Husband: "Your New Vehicle is Launched." Husband replies back: "With Gear or Without Gear?*"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Screamed on a drunk to get out of the road He replied, an Aeroplane just flew off over my head, What can a car make a difference ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long do owls live? Six and a half books.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of life''s greatest pleasures is watching your wedding video backwards... It starts off with lots of sex in a far flung exotic country. Then you move on to a massive party, surrounded by your family and your best friends, getting drunk and having a great time. Then you take off that ring, walk back down the aisle, leave the church, and go back to the pub with your friends after which an easy, stress-free, happy life awaits you. Bliss.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aztecs.... Are the religion of peace, you racist!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what they say about people with big feet... You could easily get a part-time job as a clown', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was offered sex with a 21 year old girl today.... In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner. Of course I declined, because I am a person with high moral standards and strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available with scented lemon or vanilla.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a basement full of progressives? A whine cellar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You were a still born baby.. Mother didn''t want you but you were still born.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blind dinosaur? A "Do-You-Think-He-Saw-urus" How do you call a blind dinosaur''s dog? Do-You-Think-He-Saw-urus Rex', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Muslim walks into the U.S Just kidding', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I feel like I have nobody to talk to... I call the NSA. They''re really nice because they always listen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a pizza.....I have a pineapple UGH! Satan''s creation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My science teacher taught us about gravity today. It was such a heavy subject to take...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two snakes walk into a bar... ^^^Wait, ^^^they ^^^slide... ^^^Nevermind...XD', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fastfood Clerk: Number 27! Double steak combo with extra fries! Man: Right here! Clerk: Here you go sir, sorry about your weight. Man: Oh, it wasn''t long at al- wait... Clerk: >:D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father and his 6-year-old...... A father and his 6-year-old son are walking down the street, and they come across two dogs having sex. The boy is shocked by what he sees and asks his father "Daddy, what are they doing?" The father, not wanting to lie to his son, says "they''re just making a puppy." "OK" says the son, and the father is relieved that he doesn''t probe further. The next day, the son bursts into his parents'' room and sees them having sex. The father jumps up and quickly covers himself. Knowing he''s in for an interesting talk, walks downstairs with him and they sit at the dining room table. His son asks him "Daddy, what were you and mommy doing?" Again, wanting to be honest with his son, he says "me and mommy were making a baby." His son pauses for a moment, thinking, and then replies "flip mommy over, I want a puppy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the skin on your elbow is called a weenus... Is the skin on your knee called a knee-nus? (I''m so sorry)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My teacher pointed at me with...... My teacher pointed at me with his ruler and said at the end of this ruler is and idiot! I got detention after I asked him which end he was referring to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest is giving a nun a ride home after mass one day... As they come to a stoplight the priest rests his hand on the nuns knee. The nun says "Father remember Luke 14:10", and the priest removes his hand from her knee. A little while later they come to a stop again and he places his hand on her thigh, she again says "Father remember Luke 14:10", he quickly removes his hand. He doesn''t try this again, after dropping her off he heads home and picks up his bible and flips to Luke 14:10 and it says, "Friend, move up to a better place"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a naked Asian? Barelee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Customer Service With A Smile ;) A Customer Service Clerk works for the local Grocery store. A woman who is visually upset, slams a 4 lb bag of flour on the table. Can I help you? As the clerk tries and get her to relax from a 13 to an 8. She yells at him: This flour is full of bugs! He calmly asks the woman: What are you a vegetarian?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These Stolen Valor guys all seem homeless or mentally ill... Guess they''re pretty good at impersonating our troops after all!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Asian Keanu An Asian Keanu enters a room. Asian Keanu got angry. Asian Keanu Reeves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Janet, a bit tipsy from the champagne, didn''t realize the new office photocopier was a 3D photocopier. So Steve got a nice bust for his bookshelf for christmas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am sad because I did something today. doing something stood on my not-to-do-list for today', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw my disrespectful co-worker today she was hot. "Wow, words can''t describe how pretty you are." I said walking up to her. She then replied looking at me as if I was a creep: "Uh thanks.. weirdo" "But numbers can" I smirked. "2/10. Bitch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1-step guide for Asexual Reproduction Go fuck yourself', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know a girl is into you? Just pinch yourself, if you don''t wake up, she doesn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said she''s had enough of me because I always get my directions mixed up. So I just packed my bags and right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife was choking at dinner, so I flipped her over the table, pulled her knickers down and stuck my tongue up her arse. The shock made her spit out the obstruction and breathe again. Thank god I knew the hind-lick manoeuvre!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Trump! What about the aliens from space? We need a ROOF!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People are counting down the time to the end of Trump''s presidency... Are you really that excited to have Kanye West as the president of US?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People like to compare Hillary Clinton to Hitler, but there''s one huge difference: Hitler acknowledged he was at fault for killing people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to tell the joke about the scarecrow... but I think it has already been posted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are they going to use to build the wall? The bricks that were shat by people when Trump became president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to the doctor The doctor said "im afraid your illness is terminal..." The man asked "well how long do i have doc?" The doctor said "10" The man asked "10 what?" The doctor said "9, 8, 7....."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ask /r/personalfinance to draw you a line, they deliver a circle. They always make ends meet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I go into a bar in scotland The bartender looks rather angry so I go up to him and ask what''s up He says ''you see that bridge over there'' pointing outside. I built that. But do they call me Angus the bridge builder. Nooo. ''You see this bar. I built it. Do they call me Angus the bar builder. No.'' ''But ye get caught with one goat..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FDR hates cripple humor He can''t stand it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t want to make a political joke It might get elected as president of the United States', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what if I don''t know what "apocalypse" means. It''s not like it''s the end of the world', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is caught staring so hard at his marriage certificate by his wife... She asks him what he''s looking for. He replies, "oh just the expiration date!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder... The bartender says "What a strange pet, what''s his name?" "Tiny." the man replies. "What an odd name, why do you call him tiny?" "Because he''s my newt."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know a Spanish philosopher and he lives in my kitchen... His name is Plato.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t Jews have showers in their homes? Because they''re too cheap to pay the bills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend''s a crappy computer ... she always shuts down when I need her but never shuts up when I don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the bread say before it jumped into the toaster? "I''M BREADY TO DIE"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted a cat but the wife wanted a dog ... so we compromised and got a dog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My blonde girlfriend and her Windows My girlfriend who happens to be blonde has still not upgraded her PC to Windows 10 but still continues to use version 7. When I ask her why, she just changes the subject. Finally I convince her to do the update, and then she calls me quite upset and says, "Honey, where the hell is the ''any'' key?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is sitting next to a woman on a jet that''s getting ready to take off. Suddenly, the man sneezes. He unzips his pants and wipes off the end of his penis with his handkerchief. He zips up and continues reading his magazine. The woman cannot believe what she just saw. Then he sneezes again, unzips, pulls out his penis and wipes it off with a handkerchief. The woman says, "Excuse me, sir, but that is disgusting and rude and if you do it again I am going to call the flight attendant and have you removed from this plane." He says, "I am so sorry, but I have this very rare, embarrassing physical handicap that causes me to have an orgasm every time I sneeze." The woman, disarmed by the man''s honesty and somewhat embarrassed by her own callousness, says, "Oh you poor man. Are you taking anything for it?" He answers, "Pepper."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breast Inplants They such a silly-con', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three types of people in this world. People who can count and people who can''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('China''s time zone is 28 days behind ours. "Chinese New Year"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my moose Big, brown, and horny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did you just stand there? An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church services when she was startled by an intruder. She caught him burglarizing her home of its valuables and she yelled: "Stop! Acts 2:38! Repent and be baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ, so that your sins may be forgiven." The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done. As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar, "Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture at you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boyfriend: You know you can..... Boyfriend: You know you can be a real bitch. Girlfriend: I have been called worse. Boyfriend: Like what? Girlfriend: Your girlfriend!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That''s a nice ham you have there It would be a shame if someone put an ''s'' at the start and an ''e'' at the end...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Intel, Google, Uber, eBay, McDonalds, Budweiser, AT&T, Oracle, Disney, Boeing, IBM and Apple have in common? Immigrants', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dicks are like LAYS potato chips... No one ever sucks JUST ONE!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas! This is what Santa Clause says when he sees your wife, mother and sister together in the same room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cannibal walked into a female patient''s surgery room... "I''ll take the eggs, please."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('50% of Canada Is the letter A', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have at last fulfilled my dream of becoming arms dealer... ... by selling 3D printed prosthetic limbs for the needy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man parks in a handicapped spot One day a man parks in a handicapped spot. An elderly woman woman drives up from behind, beeps the man and says "young man your not disabled, you should not be parking here". The man replies "did you just assume my gender". "Oh my mistake" says the woman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Doctor gives his patient the bad news that he only has a week to live... Patient - "No, I don''t accept that! I''d like an alternative fact please" Doctor - "Money-wise, you are now set for life"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I really like food Sorry, I made a Misteak, that wasn''t really a joke. It''s even Grater with Cheese. Damn. That was just Punishment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Red Riding Hood is skipping happily down the road when she sees the Big Bad Wolf crouched down behind a log. My what big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf! says Little Red Riding Hood. The wolf jumps up and runs away!!! Further down the road, Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again. This time, he is crouched behind a tree stump. My what big ears you have Mr. Wolf! Again, the wolf jumps up and runs away. About another two miles down the road, Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again, this time crouched down behind a road sign. My what big teeth you have Mr. Wolf! With that, the Big Bad Wolf jumps up and screams&Will you fuck off?! Im trying to take a shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s 2 + 2? A company was hiring, and had the selection down to a mathematician, an engineer, and a statistician. They called the mathematician in, and asked him what 2 + 2 was. He said, " well, in base 5 and up, it''s 4, but in lower bases, it could be 10 or 11 or 100. They called the engineer in and asked him what 2 + 2 was. He said, " theoretically, it''s 4, but it''s actually impossible to create a 2 inch rod and another 2 inch rod and place them end-to-end and get 4 because of measurement precision, temperature, etc." They called in the statistician and asked him what 2 + 2 was. He leaned in close, squinted his eyes and grinned a little, looked right and left, then said, "what do you want it to be?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Engineer smarts. An optomist, a pessimist, and an engineer were all shown a 24 ounce glass with 12 ounces of water in it. The optomist looked and said, "the glass is half full." The pessimist looked and said, "the glass is half empty." The engineer looked and said, "there''s twice as much glass as you need."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do the Welsh eat cheese? Caerphilly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My roommate asked to borrow my earbuds... Roommate: can I borrow your earbuds? Me: sorry, I don''t share. Roommate: why not? Me: ear diseases... Roommate: what are talking about?! Me: haven''t you ever heard of hearing AIDS?! Note: I apologize for nothing! Dad jokes for life!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently Abraham Lincoln kept extremely detailed records of every single tree he cut down, detailing the type of tree, dimensions, even the location where it was cut, and more. They''re called the Lincoln Logs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy dies and wakes up on a beach. Nice weather, hot girls playing beach volleyball, barbecues everywhere, laughter and joy. All of a sudden, Satan comes up to him. "Welcome to hell. Enjoy yourself, have a drink, have a hamburger and check out the area. If you need anything or have a question, feel free to ask me." he says. The guy walks along the beach, has a few drinks with a nice girl. He walks over a hill, when he sees a hole in the ground, full with tormented people, flames rising up from the hole. The guy runs towards the beach until he finds Satan. "Hey, I found this hole and all these people are being tormented... Whats that about?" "Oh," Satan says, "thats for the Christians, they want it that way."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the best part about sleeping with a midget? You''re sure to get a little head', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump, how do you plan on building the wall? 140 characters at a time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the roman cannibal feel about his victim? He was glad he ate her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things in the United States have been awfully unfortunate as of late It''s almost as if it were built upon a gigantic native american burial ground', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ''''I''m looking for the man who shot my paw.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you trigger a switch? Flip it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which bear can dissolve in water? A polar bear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dead battery? The car stood n the darkness of a deserted road. Directing the beam from his flashlight onto the automobile, a newly assigned policeman approached the car. When he came close enough to see inside the car, he found a guy and his girl silently stting in the front seat. Dead battery? he asked the boy. No, the boy replied, glaring at his girl companion,flat tire!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign outside at "Justice of the Peace" You furnish the bride...........we will do the rest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new season of House of Cards will be nothing compared to what lies ahead with President Trump!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a prostitute wear on her feet? Whore shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear you cant go to the theater in your old coat, can you? Husband: Dear you cant go to the theater in your old coat, can you? Wife (hopefully): Certainly not, dearest. Husband: Just what I thought so I only bought one ticket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the dog shaking? He had Barkinson''s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between gluten and hillbillies? One''s inbred, the others in bread', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('United States of America', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s been a shooting at a local bar... And the only survivor is a monkey. The police ask the monkey what the men over at bar itself were doing. The monkey mimes them drinking. The police then ask the monkey what the group over in the corner were doing. The monkey mimes the group playing poker. The police ask the monkey what the group in the other corner were doing. The monkey mimes them drinking and playing poker. Finally the police ask what the monkey was doing. The monkey mimes shooting up the entire bar with a machine gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give it to me, my girlfriend yelled. "I''m so fucking wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was talking to a fat girl about her weight... I was addressing the literal elephant in the room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Scottish highlanders does it take to change a light bulb? There can be only one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m surprised Trump ran as a Republican I thought he was running as a joke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife was abducted by a gang of mimes. They did unspeakable things to her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a donkey. I named it Heeh. It died. Heeh awwwww. :-(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I enjoy my women like I enjoy my coffee... Blindfolded and scared.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirate''s favorite type of joke? Traditionally a pun involving an "arrr", but for the purposes of this joke, it''s sarrrcasm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between New York City and the Land of Mordor? Two Towers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Soliciting a blowjob is illegal. Soliciting a blowjob is illegal, but betting a whore $50 she can''t swallow your cum isn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the 90''s Arsenal Soccer Club Had a player called David Dicks. When he was injured,the Newspaper wrote"Arsenal to play without Dicks". The coach was upset so the Newspaper changed the headline to read"Arsenal to play with Dicks out"... A record number of women attended the match', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sketchy neighborhood in Italy? A Spaghetto.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not a Grammar Nazi I''m alt-write', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like women like i like my pizza Crusty with lots of cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t like holocaust jokes. Anne Frankly you shouldn''t either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s an SS soldier''s favorite key? I don''t know, but I know it''s not C!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say when you''ve hit rock bottom, the only way is up... Well, I must have drilled a fucking hole in that rock because I keep falling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the Scottish started to colonize North America before the British... Could I say that the Scott Pilgrims landed at Plymouth Rock?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Trump''s reaction to the petition for him to release his tax returns Not my precedent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 moles were digging underground. They are in perfect line. Out of nowhere each gets a slightly different smell of the same source. "What is that delicious smell in front of us?" Asks the first mole. "I don''t know know, but it smells like cotton candy!" Replies the middle mole. "No, no! It has got to be butterscotch!" The first shouts. The first and middle look to the mole at the end of the line. "Who do you agree with?" The last mole stops. "I disagree with the both of you. It smells like molasses!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was told the general rules of life is to help people, be nice and give aids. So I don''t know why everybody is getting mad at me for infecting them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my steaks bloody and full of knives', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between jam and jelly I can''t jelly my dick in your mom''s ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my coffee Not tasting something gritty and hairy when slurping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re restoring Auschwitz to its past condition. My first question is how soon they will have it operating.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked upto my black cop friend and said "I always wanted to be a clack man, would you help me?" He said sure... and put my hands up where he can see them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike: I''m really glad I wasn''t born in France. Jim: Why? Mike: I can''t speak French.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A director, an accountant and and engineer go for a round of golf... By the time they get to the fourth, there''s a bunch of guys thrashing around blocking the course. The director calls over a groundsman and says "Who the hell are those bloody idiots up ahead?" "Ah yes sir, they''re from the local school for the blind." "You mean they''re actually blind?" Says the director incredulously. "Yes sir." "That''s bloody ridiculous, time is money and I have an urgent meeting this afternoon!" The accountant says "Well, in these tough finacial times, the Club probably needs all the revenue it can get." The engineer says "So why don''t they play at night?."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am 48 and my wife is 8 months pregnant. am i too old to be a dad?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Donald Trump convince Mike Pence to be his Vice President? He told him the job would be worth as much as a warm bucket of piss. Then, he showed him a video.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the shrimp share his food?? He was a little shellfish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between an anal thermometer and an oral thermometer? The taste', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 Christians are lost in the Arabian desert The first day is hot, and they''re miserable after running out of food and water. The night is surprisingly cold and even worse than the day. The second day and night are even worse. On the third morning, hotter than the past 2 days, they see a mosque. "We''re saved!" exclaims one. The other is wary and says he doesn''t think they''ll help Christians. The first says he doesn''t care, he''s so hungry he''d rather be killed than starve. The second one decides to tell them he''s Muslim. They arrive and the first man says he''s Christian and asks for help. The Muslims are very friendly and tell him they have plenty of food and water for him. The second one tells them he''s Muslim. The reply: "Salaam, brother! Happy Ramadan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you''ve been eating grass for the past ten minutes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are twins favorite fruits? Pears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The more you know, the more you don''t know. What constitutes terrorism', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mountain ranges aren''t funny They''re hill areas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the ocean said to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump: "Hows that Mexican mall going?" "Mall? We thought you said wall" Trump: "No way that''s harsh, also hows that Muslim band looking?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You think 7 years is bad luck for breaking a mirror??? Try breaking a condom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have Yogg-Saron as a psychiatrist.... I don''t think he''s good, whenever I walk in to his room, I feel like I''m getting more insane by the minute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Do Scottish people wear kilts? Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Freudian slip? It''s when you say one thing but fuck your mother', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend did some graffiti with me He just tagged along.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a kidnapping at my school He woke up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have big feet... It runs in the family', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Hitler prefer pajamas more than suits Cause they are more kampfy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was going to make a joke about sodium but then I thought Na.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Challenger anniversary* joke: What did Christa McAuliffe say to her husband before they left the house? You feed the cats, I''ll feed the fish. The "too soon?" Joke from 30 years ago.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the Harriet Tubman and the Red Hot Chili Peppers? Harriet Tubman was a heroine to the slaves; the Red Hot Chili Peppers are slaves to the heroin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do moths fly with their legs apart? Have you ever seen the size of moth balls?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, why couldn''t the doctors save grandpa''s life? Doesn''t matter son, he would have suffocated in the coffin"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young artist puts his first exhibit in an art gallery ... and a well known art critic is in attendance. The critic says to the young artist, "would you like my opinion on your work?" "Yes, " says the artist. "It''s worthless," says the critic The artist replies, "I know, but tell me anyway."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump''s family bought him a Gandalf the Grey costume for his birthday. Unfortunately, this wasn''t the sort of Grand Wizard outfit he had in mind...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump decided to make some music with his old clarinet... he called it "Alternative Rock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How about that train food? It''s off the rails', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who was the roundest knight at the Round Table? Sir Cumference', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not saying there is a direct correlation between Trump''s election... But the Chinese did say this would be the year of the Cock ages ago!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like my coffee. Without a penis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like Christmas gifts... They lose value after 25.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend finally asked me who I''ve had sex with in all of my life I held back nothing and told her about every one of them. My first, the girls in higschool, that one time with her friend back in college, until I got to her... I probably should''ve stopped there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn''t matter what you call him, he''s not coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a Taiwanese friend who is is incredibly rude and bossy He has a strong Taipei personality', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the next election and hindsight have in common? They both 2020', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sits at a bar crying The barkeeper asks him: "Why are you crying?" He answers:"My wife and I had an argue and she said she won''t talk to me again for a whole year." "That''s terrible", the barkeeper replied. The Man:"Worse, the year is over today!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I do things to children that they''re too young to understand... ...such as teaching them calculus and microbiology.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trumps hands are not that small Any hands would look small on such a massive cunt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man didn''t invent the wheel It invented itself after seeing Chuck Norris.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English speaker, a French speaker, a Spanish speaker, and a German speaker are in a park... ... when a man stands up on a table in front of them and asks if they can see him. They all nod and say: "Yes." "Oui." "Si." "Ja."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? One. We are efficient and don''t have humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks his father A boy asks his father, "Dad, what does a vagina look like?" The dad asks "Before or after sex, son?" The boy replies "Both." So the dad says "Before- it''s like a beautiful rose. Just amazing and beautiful, truly something to appreciate..." So the boy says "And after?" "Son, have you ever seen a pit bull after it''s gotten into a jar of mayonnaise?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two types of people in this world Those who can extrapolate information based off of the given context', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are jews best known for? Prophets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Muslim on a plane? Soon to be detained for flying home to his family in Houston after a business trip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('American wall A Mexican, American and Chinese are walking along the beach when they find a bottle, the Chinese man rubs it and out pops a genie, he grants of each guy one wish. The Mexican goes goes first and asks for a mansion in California sure enough his wish is granted. Then the American who is a red neck living in California, I''ve had enough of those Mexicans moving to California, I want you to build a wall around California to keep those Mexicans out, his wish is granted. Then the Chinese''s turn, he asks the genie how high is the wall? The genie says 150 feet, the Chinese knows Trump is visiting California, he says to the genie fill it with water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good thing I don''t see any political posts on my news feed In fact, my Myspace friends haven''t really posted much since 2010.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked santacraus for everything in the world found my sock inside out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump was stunned when he first laid eyes on Melania. Slowly he approached. He smiled and said "I must order this one" as he picked up the catalogue from the table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call money earmarked for use when the terrorist threat is high? Orange aid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was banned from the Middle East, so this is what I did... Iran', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a woman and a computer? You can actually punch information into a computer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('White House Update: Dick Cheney extends hunting invitation to Trump Nope. Sorry. Just kidding. Edit: buncha scrubs keep downvoting my hilarious joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Political opinions are like assholes If yours shows up in my Facebook feed I will probably block you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell male from female ants? Throw them in a bucket of water; if it floats, it''s buoyant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guys, the USA is looking pretty bad... I think its time for USB.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An invisible man and an invisible woman got married. Their kids were nothing to look at either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Classic Why don''t blind people like to go skydiving? Because it scares the dogs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know it''s spring in Israel? There''s a Rosenbloom on every block!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s been a week since my wife went missing. The police told me to expect the worst. So I took her things back out of the garbage bin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you tell your wife if she has two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are pharmaceutical chemists considered such studs? They''re able to make a fun-gal cream.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the compulsive gambler with diarrhea? Well, he lost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Harry Potter''s philosophy on relationships... Hit it and quidditch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter how popular they get.. ... antibiotics are never going viral.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s favorite California city? Banning', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called when a black person wears whiteface? Going incognegro.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of meat does a priest eat on Friday? Nun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a job assisting a fledgling orchestra with their day to day activities and helping to organize upcoming shows... My official title is Band Aide. (I thought of this in the shower, so it''s definitely not funny)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey gurl, you banned from America yet? Cause dat'' ass is out of this world... and therefore unamerican and cannot be trusted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife wanted me to whisper dirty things in her ear... So I leaned forward and said: "dishes, bathroom and laundry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love, I''m pregnant, what would you like it to be? A joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attention! My cousin has 2 tickets for the 2017 SUPER BOWL, both box seats. He paid $ 2,000 for both tickets, but he didn''t realize last year when he bought them, it was going to be the same day of his wedding. If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place...It''s at United Methodist Church @ 3pm. Her name is Charlene, she is 5''6 about 140lbs, good cook too...She''ll be the one in the white dress!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Republicans have to say about the latest edition of Democratic nonsense ? Nothing... They were busy at work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate... And I can picture us invading that world because they''d never see it coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do gay people eat for breakfast? An all you can eat pufft', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love being excluded from things Should have got a green card', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My SO gives great handjobs And I''m not saying that because I''m a narcissist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to submit a patent for a gold-plated butt plug, but Steve Jobs beat me to it. It turns out, he was already making overpriced toys for assholes [Obligatory edit: top submitted post is about butt plugs. Wowza! Also, thank you, kind Redditor for the gold! I can''t believe a gilded joke is about sex toys :)]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a fruit and a nut? I don''t fruit all over your mother''s tits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Told this girl to text me when she got home ... I think she''s homeless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the collision between the cement truck and the septic pump truck? There was some pretty hard shit in the road.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s been revealed that President Donald Trump has "Batmophobia", otherwise known as a "chronic fear slopes" Now I understand why he was keen to dodge the draft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There I was, eating cornflakes and milk out of the bowl... when my dad came in, shook his head and pulled the handle to flush them away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John Hurt? Nope, John Dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought I''d only need to make one more joke about 2016 not being over But this one really Hurt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like first aid classes its the only time I get to be touched by a caring human.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arkansas Redneck Sex Two rednecks are chugging beers in a Little Rock bar. One sheepishly asks the other, "So, do you ever cry when you have sex with a new woman?" The other says, "All the time. It''s the pepper spray".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rob thank God you picked up! Hey remember when you said if a needed a place to crash i cou- hold on ****to copilot**** STOP CRYING ROB WILL HELP!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know that I have an attitude problem But I just don''t care', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Jesus play hockey? He keeps getting NAILED TO THE BOARDS!...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Scientology and Donald Trump? Scientology has better celebrities.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LeBron James laughs at all the countries banning people from entering Because he has traveling immunity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like boners Ignore them and they will go away. Beat them and they too will get away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that the first condoms were made of fish intestines. So people had the guts to do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between people who voted for Trump, and those that didn''t? On average, about $30,000 in student debt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my golf score Mid-eighties and with slight handicap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know those slices of American cheese you get from the supermarket? You''re not going to be able to buy those anymore. Since Trump is going to make America grate again, apparently.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A CEO goes to heaven... A CEO passes away and goes to heaven. There''s a line to get in, but he''s not used to waiting in lines and figures this must be a line for all those other people. He bustles on up to the head of the line, but St. Peter sees him and stops him. "Hey, what do you think you''re doing?" "Well, I am - was - CEO of ..." "That doesn''t make any difference up here, we''re all equal. Go to the back of the line, unless you have somewhere else to go..." So he goes to the back of the line, trying to assimilate his newfound status of ''equal'', when he sees a man go past him. The man is in a white coat and has a stethoscope around his neck. He bypasses everyone and goes on in. The former CEO is incensed. He marches up to the front of the line and confronts St. Peter. "How come that doctor got to go in ahead of everyone, if we''re all equal here?" "Oh, that was God. He just thinks he''s a doctor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something happened at a friend''s work A relative of mine works at a toy distribution center. They specialize in talking dolls. They recently received a Muslim one, but nobody knows what it says because they''re all afraid to pull the cord.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The good news First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A toast! Had to throw away my toaster because it kept burning my toast. I guess you could say I''m black toast intolerant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can''t believe that Trump is banning Muslims from the U.S. Like, Syria-sly America?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of America''s Longest Running Gags... Trickle-down Economics', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never trust stairs, They''re always up to something.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it awful to be an egg? You only get laid once, it takes three minutes to get hard, and you come in a box with eleven others.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s long and hard and is full of seamen? Naval college', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The demolition workers performed at the workers event last night. Heard they brought down the house with their act.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the alt-right call day? Alt-night', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whenever one door closes, another opens. "Wow, you must be very optimistic about life." "No, I live in a haunted house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friends are baffled that I gave up the single life for my European wife and wonder why I don''t chase girls anymore. It''s because she keeps me in Czech.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s harder than rocket science? My dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Australian walks into a US bar... ...with a crocodile under his arm. The bartender takes one look and says, "Hey! You can''t bring that dangerous animal in here!" "Dangerous? That ridiculous!" the Aussie proclaims. "Watch this!" He places the croc on a table and grabs a nearby newspaper, rolling it up. He hits the croc over the head. The croc''s jaws slowly open. The Australian whips out his dick, lays it over the crocodile''s teeth, and hits it on the head again. The croc closes it''s mouth ever-so-gently, not breaking his skin. "Anyone else wanna try it?" the Australian asks. A blonde woman raises her hand and says, "I will...if you don''t hit me with the paper."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks for?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move." "Oh", said the man. "Whose clock is that?" "That''s Mother Teresa''s", replied St. Peter. "The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie." "Incredible", said the man. "And whose clock is that one?" St. Peter responded, "That''s Abraham Lincoln''s clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life." "Where''s Donald Trump''s clock?" asked the man. St. Peter pointed upwards and said, "Right there, we''re using it as a ceiling fan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a tree with no leaves? Bark Naked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Christa McAuliffe say to her husband right before she got on the Challenger Shuttle? Honey you feed the dog I''ll feed the fish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cats and Dogs Did you know cats are smarter than dogs? Dogs can''t take x-rays, but cats can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Pervert, A Con Artist and a Fascist walk into a bar... ..The Bartender Says, "What''ll it be Mr. President Trump?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Puns plz Someone throw shit out there for me to make puns with. A topic, or whatever, and I''ll do my best. Anyone else can join in too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named ''Amal. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named ''Amal.'' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan''. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, ''''But they are twins. If you''ve seen Juan, you''ve seen Amal.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 types of people in this world... The ones who understand binary, and the ones who get laid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you want to celebrate!? It''s the year of the cock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Irish gangster that all living systems strive for? (X /r/ScienceJokes) Homie O''Stasis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a secret society of beef trying to take over the world? The Meat Cabal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two penguins are driving in a car ... The driver says: "hey could you change the radio station?" And the other one says: "No radio?" "Four wheels!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Trump got elected... The Mexicans hispanicked and freaked out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock... Who''s there? "Good afternoon sir! If we could jus have a moment of your time, we''d like to talk to you about the church of Scientology"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A giraffe is at the airport going through the TSA line ... And the security agent says: "hey, is the your laptop?" And the giraffe says: "I thought you''d never ask"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is the saltiest fish? Tuna', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the local buy and sell to see if there were any cool old jack in the boxes. But nothing jumped out at me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American bloke goes on holiday to England. On his return, he''s telling his pal all about it. "I was coming out of a shop one day and it was raining hard outside, so I took shelter in a doorway. Another feller was sheltering too, and he turned to me and he said, "Nice weather". Well, of course it wasn''t nice weather at all. In fact it was terrible weather...and then I got it! This was an example of the famous British irony! I loved it! And I''ve been using irony ever since. Like the other day, I was having this barbecue for the family and a bunch of neighbours, and I burned the burgers. And Joe, from next door, was standing there and I turned to him and looked at the burgers and said, "Nice weather"." - from "Nobody reads long copy anymore. Here''s why."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you put on Mongolian Beef? Tatar Sauce.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell if a girl is ticklish? You give her two test tickles I will see myself out. Thank you and have a good day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is that a booger in your nose? No, it''s snot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was playing some dubstep and when the beat dropped... My deaf friend said to turn the volume down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that 1/100 people have undiagnosed dyslexia Whoops, wrong bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Former presidential candidate Senator Sanders falls ill. What do you call him? A sick Bern.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard this really funny joke about procastination I''ll post it later', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, ''Kin ya swallar?'' The woman shakes her head no. Then he asks, ''Kin ya breathe?'' The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no. The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table. His partner says, ''Ya know, I''d heerd of that there ''Hind Lick Maneuver'' but I ain''t niver seed nobody do it!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father has three sons. One is an accountant, one is an engineer and the other is a lawyer... The father asks each of his three sons the same question, "what does two plus two equal?" The accountant son answers, "four point zero zero." The engineer son answers "somewhere between 3.9999 and 4.0001." Finally, the father asks his son the lawyer "what does two plus two equal?". The lawyer pulls his father into the other room and closes the door. He then closes the blinds and motions for his father to come into the corner. He whispers, "what do you want it to equal?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had an Germany born English teacher in high school. If you know what I mean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandfather died in a concentration camp It was terrible, he got drunk one night and fell off a guard tower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A relative of mine works at a toy distribution center. They specialize in talking dolls. They recently received a Muslim one, but nobody knows what it says because they''re all afraid to pull the cord.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does clickbait work? Just grab this electrical cable. Then what happens? WHAT HAPPENS NEXT WILL SHOCK YOU!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If people had to pay rolling pins, They''d be rollin'' in the dough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes crop circles? A protractor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if someone''s a pilot? because they''ll fucking tell you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the unicycle win the race? Because the bicycle was two tired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women how I like my computer. On my lap. Turned on. Virus free.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an aging actor who has finally paid off his house? Mortgage freeman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my Welsh mate how many sexual partners he''s had. He started counting and fell asleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A plateau is the highest form of flattery. That''s it...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at the cemetery this morning... I was at the cemetery this morning to visit my grandparents grave when I noticed that there were 4 guys carrying a coffin up and down between the graves. When I was leaving I noticed that the 4 guys were still carrying the coffin up and down between the graves. As I sat in my car, about to drive away, I couldn''t help but think, "those guys have lost the plot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Personally I think Trumps a Genius, How do you beat China? Hit them hard by one upping them with a Wall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend said he didn''t mind homosexuality, just didn''t like it in his bedroom. I asked, "have you tried the kitchen?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you combine north beach and south beach? Sum of beaches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy goes to his parents to tell them something "Mom, Dad. I''m gay." His father then turns to him and says "Hi Gay, I''m 100 Dollars Richer!", while recieving money from the mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tour guide stabs a customer to a bloody mess. She wanted to be tored.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My nervous system is so narcissistic. It only thinks about itself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Snowman pull his pants down? Because the snowblower was coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife says to her Accountant husband Wife: what is inflation? Husband: Earlier you were 36-24-36. But now you are 48-40-48. Though you have everything bigger than before, your value has become less than before. This is INFLATION', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Jewish elbow. A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartment. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3. When you get out, I''m on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell." "Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow? "What...you coming empty handed?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fart Football An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, ''Seven Points.'' His wife rolls over and says, ''What in the world was that?'' The old man replied, ''its fart football.'' A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says, ''Touchdown, tie score...'' After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, ''Aha. I''m ahead 14 to 7.'' Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, ''Touchdown, tie score.'' Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, ''Field goal, I lead 17 to 14.'' Now the pressure is on for the old man. He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard. Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he''s got, and accidentally poops in the bed. The wife says, ''What the hell was that?'' The old man says, ''Half time, switch sides', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A king wants his daughter to have..... A king wants his daughter to have a husband so he puts up a flier. The first guy comes and the king puts green glitter on his daughters private part. The next morning the king checks the guys private part and there''s green glitter all over it. More and more guys come along and the same thing keeps happening. Finally, one day this guy comes along. The king puts the green glitter on his daughters private part, and the next morning checks the guys privates and there was no green glitter. The king is thrilled and offers the man his daughters hand in marriage. The guy smiles to accept with a mouth full of green glitter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jessica was feeling ill for a few days before going to the doctor... The doctor walks into the room and asks Jessica how old she is and what the issue is. She tells the doc that she''s 12 years old and she''s been having pain in her lower abdomen. The doctor tells Jessica that she must be starting puberty and asks if she''s been doing anything different than normal. Jessica gets a little embarrassed and tells him, "I''ve been putting Jolly Ranchers in my pussy." The doctor is shocked and asks her why she''s been doing this. Jessica replies, "Well, when I was getting food at the local diner, I heard all the guys talking about how many jolly ranchers have been in my mom''s pussy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife just left me because I spent our life savings on a penis enlargement... She couldn''t take it any longer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer I''m not sure what he laced them with, but I''ve tripping all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear Donald Trump wants every welfare recipient to take a drug test... I don''t even what to know what he''s planning to do with all those urine samples.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two men on the opposite sides of the world, One is on a tightrope walking between two buildings 90 stories high. The other is getting a blowjob from a 90 year old woman. They both have exactly the same thought..........Don''t look down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love everything about Motorbikes But sometimes they just make me two-tyred.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a gay horse eat? heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was visiting my daughter last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper. "This is the 21st century," she said. "We don''t waste money on newspapers. Here, use my iPad.". I can tell you this... That fly never knew what hit him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Knock Knock Who''s there? Europe Europe who? No you''re a poo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Nixon have a reputation for not being punctual? He is, after all, the late Richard Nixon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a projectile that is very good at finding friends? A homie missile.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently my coworker has lived a very sheltered life. He comes up to me while I''m eating lunch and asks "Say, what is that you''re eating out of??" "What, my thermos?" "Yeah! How does that work?" "Uhh, it keeps the hot stuff hot and the cold stuff cold." "Wow! I oughta get me one of those!" And he just walks away. I didn''t give it much thought until he shows up to my desk today, fuming mad "It didn''t work like you said it would!" He shoves his open thermos in my face and inside is some weird, multicolored shit with two wooden sticks floating on top. I ask "Ugh! What the hell did you put in it!?" "Two popsicles and chicken noodle soup, why!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has 99 legs and one tooth? The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Harry Potter better than Jews? He made it out of the chamber.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people say Pokemon is for little kids. It isnt and if you bully me I''m telling my mommy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People compare Trump and hitler all the time, but there is one major difference. Hitler was good at making speeches', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are there any prostitutes you can hire just to talk to you??? Apparently they are called therapist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a knight that jousts all the time Sir Lancelot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did jesus say to his dad.. Who died and made you god?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the sous chef set a baby on fire? Flambby', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t like rape jokes. They''re always so forced.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some mornings I wake up bitchy... Other mornings I let her sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I burnt my Hawaiian pizza today. I should have cooked it at Aloha temperature.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sick eagle that just flew in from out of the country? an ill-eagle immigrant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a neo-nazi plays jazz, what time signature do they use? 14/88.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son: Dad, I''m hungry Son: Dad, I''m hungry Dad: Okay, I''ll go to the store It has been 12 years. He still hasn''t come back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know there''s a French man who was named after a saint, and is now widely known for dabbing and whipping so hard, he actually ends up breaking his arms? His name is Pre Fouethard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NY Times said Gen Xers spend the most amount of time on the internet. Data were collected by survey monkey, analyzed by baby boomers and written up by the millennial intern.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My daughter wanted a Disney Princess birthday party& &so I made all her friends come over and clean my house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said she''d leave me if I spend any more time on the internet. Bet closed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It doesnt matter how popular apple is... everyone has Windows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a vegetarian that eats seafood? An omnivore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Aisha a world renowned penetration tester? Because muhammad taught her from a very young age.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cheating I was devastated to find out my wife was having an affair, but, by turning to religion, I was soon able to come to terms with the whole thing. I converted to Islam, and we''re stoning her in the morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a nun pregnant? You dress her up as an altar boy..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Job interview A guy goes to a job interview and the interviewer asks " how is your maths skills". The guy replies " oh, im real fast at maths". The interviewer is curious and decides to test him with some quick-fire questions. " Interviewer: ok then. 95? The guy quickly responds 50 Interviewer: 102 The guy immediately answers back again "32" The interviewer is puzzled and says "those answers were both wrong. youre absolutely terrible at math" To which the guy responds "yeah, but im fast at it"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guitar teacher joke One of my guitar students wants me to teach him Wonderwall, I said maybe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many noses did the guy with the best sense of smell have? Two noses? No, one nose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Marie le Pen''s favourite nuts? Catchjews', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finding a job is difficult... I started at the orange juice factory but couldn''t concentrate, Being a tailor just didn''t suit me, I couldn''t cut it as a barber, I didn''t have the foundations to be an architect, I just didn''t have enough patients to be a doctor, I felt soleless in the shoe factory, I couldn''t hack it as a lumberjack, I couldn''t keep my eye on the job as an optician, Being an electrician was shocking, Sewage maintenance was just draining, I just wasn''t taking off as a pilot, My spell as a wizard didn''t work, Working at a coffee shop was too much of a grind, I didn''t make the grade as a teacher, I didn''t have the thyme to be a chef, My career as a comedian was a joke, I couldn''t see a future being a historian, And now I''m an archaeologist and my future lies in ruins!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best thing about having an STD... you get to share it with people who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally found an onramp for the road to success!!!! It was closed for construction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A German and a Swiss are arguing about who''s country is better... The German, clearly annoyed, asks the Swiss "So what''s so great about Switzerland?" The Swiss shrugs, simply saying. "Well, the flag is a big plus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 69-ing in China? Tu Can Chu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Forest Gump decides to run for President of USA and is getting interviewed about it. Interviewer: "We were all surprised that you decided to run for President Mr Gump, what made you do that"? Gump: "My personal experiences really compel me to do it." I: "What type of promises will you make to the voters?" Gump: "Well first of all I''d make running the national sport, fishing the national past time, Curious George the national book, ping pong taught in all classes and no more war." I:"Thats interesting as that can be viewed as something very anti-American especially how American''s love war. Tell me something, how can you defeat Trump?" Gump: " I have a higher IQ then him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Went to the Indian bakery today and asked for some bread They said they had naan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Donald Trump take anti-anxiety pills? To prevent Hispanic attacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fear of deadly snakes? Common sense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the perfect name for an Indian butler? Mahatma Coat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Donald Trump''s least favorite ''80s band? Foreigner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Batman''s least favorite videogame? Injustice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('..Trump said "Buy american, Hire american" Standing on an Ikea podium from *Sweden*, behind bullet proof by Saint Gobain Glass from *France*, smiling at a 4K Sony *Japanese* Video camera, speaking into a Dolby Sennheiser *German* microphone, with vigorous hand gestures giving a glimpse of a Rolex under the cuff made in *Switzerland* he patriotically said ..*"Buy American, Hire American, Stop Immigrants".* while standing beside a *Slovenian wife*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband: "Babe, I just won the lottery! Pack a bag!" Wife: "Oh my goodness -- This is amazing! Where are we going?! What do I pack?!" Husand: "I don''t care. Just pack and get the fuck out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trying to think of a new password WINDOWS: Please enter your new password. USER: cabbage WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters. USER: boiled cabbage WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character. USER: 1 boiled cabbage WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces. USER: 50fuckingboiledcabbages WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character. USER: 50FUCKINGboiledcabbages WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively. USER: 50FuckingBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon''tGiveMeAccessNow! WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation. USER: ReallyPissedOff50FuckingBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDontGiveMeAccessNow WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was so embarrassed when I got an erection during a prostate exam. Especially when they found out I''m not even a doctor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexico should be happy about Trump building the Wall... The GDR payed 400 Million Mark to get their "wall against facism".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you wake Lady Gaga? Pokerface', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexicans are shocked about Trump''s wall But they''ll get over it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard of the Ancient Greek hero Bophades? He was a lot like Achilles, he had just one weakness. Except instead of his heel it was his groin. You may have heard of "Achilles heel", but have you heard of "Bophades'' nuts"?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cops contacts with homicide via radio: - Send in a team ... - What is situation? - The murder, the victim is a man, 38 years old, his mother struck him with a knife several times for entering on the wet, just cleaned floor. - Did you arrest her? - No, the floor still wet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People always tell me not to piss in the shower... ...but you know, it''s difficult not to when you''re taking a shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Italians enter the bus in New York... Two Italians enter the bus in New York and start very noisy conversation: " .... ''em come first, then I come, two asses together, I come again, two asses together, then I pee, pee again and I come in the end... " An old lady nereby can''t stand it any longer and says: " You pigs, what a shame to discuss your disgusting sexual life on public!!!! " Italian: " Hey, wassup lady??? I just tella my friend, how to spella Mississippi....."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend left a note on the fridge "This is not working I''m going to my mum''s house." So, I opened the fridge''s door, the light came on and the juice was cold. - What the hell did she mean?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three words to ruin a man''s ego. "Is it in?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rick Astley told me that you could borrow any of his Disney movies, except Up He''s never gonna give you Up...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do fake news sites and porn subreddits have in common? No source.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was having a piss in a war zone. Probably wasn''t the best time for one of my fellow soldiers to yell, "Cover me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I said to her: "Two more inches and I''d be a king" "Two inches less and you''d be a queen", she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Rabbi and the Mexican say to each other at the Trump rally? Jew! Es!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the IRS audit IRS: According to your tax return you claim got money for nothin'' & checks for free. Taxpayer: Am I in trouble for that? IRS: We''d say you''re in dire straits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 5 people sitting In two rows? Tetris', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Work At Sears And Some Black Guys Came In Asking For Polyester Pants It''s weird because they usually pick cotton.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mechanical engineers wife comes out of delivery. She texts him She texts him : "your new vehicle has been launched". He replies : " is it with gear stick or automatic?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I brought a pet iguana home from the pet store... I think there''s something wrong with him because he''s very lethargic and I can''t get him up. It must be a reptile dysfunction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is grey and comes in pints? An elephant!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sumo wrestlers have to make sure their legs are always shaven So people don''t confuse them with feminists', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two types of people in this world, Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a foot long, made of leather and sounds like a sneeze? A shoe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does this joke have in common with Madeline McCann? They both never get old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('RIP Boiling water You''ll be mist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the Boar say to the Pig? "I''m a furry"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[True story] I asked a filipino for the time.. He replied: "It''s por pipty pive"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find arrows? At a Target', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a kitten who accidentally eat all your pills? A Caterpillar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Bollywood version of the Dr Jekyll story is more childish. Hyde and Sikh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I accidentally poked my girlfriend in the eye while she was sleeping. She didn''t even see it cumming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than roses on your piano? Tulips on your organ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found the city in which cheese was first produced! It''s from Age!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump doesn''t want to have sex with his daughter He just has "alternative family values"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone seems to think that Trump''s new wall is offensive... but I just think it''s more wallish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always give 110% Which is why my cum is considered the creamiest substance known to man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What language does a dozen speak? Twelveish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sits down at a bar And looks around for the bartender to order a drink. He sees nobody but hears a small voice that says, "That''s an awfully nice shirt you''re wearing." Confused, the man looks around and sees only a bowl of peanuts on the bar. Needing a smoke, the man walks over to the cigarette machine. As he gets closer, he hears a different voice, this time insulting his shoes. The man, now utterly confused, turns around and walks back to the bar. The bartender walks out from the kitchen and apologizes for not hearing him come in and let''s him know the peanuts are complimentary but the cigarette machine is out of order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stalin''s political career didn''t really take off, until he played the trump card -Seize the means of reproduction!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, there''s these two sisters A blonde girl asks her older blonde sister. "How do you give a blow job?" Her sister smiles and says. "Next time you have to take a shower, take a bath instead. Look real close, when you see yourself, put your mouth to the water and start blowing real hard, it''s not slutty if it''s yourself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man dies and goes to heaven In heaven, he sees a wall of very large clocks. He asks the Angel "What are all these clocks for?" Angel answers "These are lie clocks, every person has one lie clock. Whenever you lie on earth, the clock ticks once." The man points towards a clock and asks, "Who''s clock does this belong to?" Angel answers ''This clock belongs to Mother Teresa. It has never moved, so she has never told a lie." then the man asks "Where is Hillary Clintons clock?" The Angel replies "That one is in our office, we use it as a table fan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man and a genie He''s granted three wishes, genie tells him to go in the hotel on the beach where all his wishes will be granted, he steps in the main floor and finds himself knee deep in hundred dollar bills, he smiles as he starts up the stairs where he finds the entire floor filled with beautiful women wanting to satisfy his every desire, as he heads up the stairs to the third floor to find his third wish he is suddenly grabbed by several men and thrown out the window with a noose around his neck where he slowly strangulates. The genie sitting on the beach sipping a drink looks over and smiles as he recalls that many men wish to wade knee deep in money and many more wish to be lavished upon by many beautiful woman but once again he is perplexed as to why any man would ever wish to be hung like a nigger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One mans trash is another mans treasure Is a good quote... But apparently its not the best way to tell your kid he''s adopted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is always a blessing to have more bishops it makes the church more accessible to children *ahem* people', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a dyslexic,agnostic and insomniac spend most of his time doing? Staying up all night thinking if there really is a dog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy enters a haircutters... ...and the barber whispers to his customer, This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you. The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, Which do you want, son? The boy takes the quarters and leaves. What did I tell you? said the barber. That kid never learns! Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill? The boy licked his cone and replied, Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Poor Russians A Russian woman walked into an empty Moscow shop. "I see you have no vegetables today" "No," said the shopkeeper, "this is a butcher shop. It''s meat we haven''t got. The shop with no vegetables is further down the street."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than 8 babies in 1 dustbin?.. 1 baby in 8 dustbins', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Eric Clapton and Donald Trump have in common? They were both jealous of the size of a black man''s crowd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has six eyes, four wings and eight legs? Two chickens and a goat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Dougherty would smash all the dishes I used to know a family named Dougherty. Every time they were going traveling, they would calmly go through the kitchen and smash all the plates, cups and bowls, then cheerily sweep up the mess. I asked them why they did this, and Mr. Dougherty said "I don''t want to come home to a house full of Dougherty dishes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket... Suddenly she realises that some asshole has her pen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many babies would it take to paint your house red? Well, that depends on how hard you throw them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know, those people who insult Obama and the Clintons.. really need to stop beating around the Bush.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Came First... The chicken Or the furry?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God made each and every one of us until he got to China. Copy paste...copy paste...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bikes Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a gay dinosaur called? Nsfw Megasorass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pilot say to the Vietnamese mechanic underneath the plane? " "You are the Nguyen beneath my wings"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cold lesbian? A klondyke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbours listen to good music Whether they want to or not', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can a woman make you a millionaire? When you marry her as a billionaire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Playing guitar at parties Playing guitar at parties is all good and fun until someone tries to finger A minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton is not a rapist. He just likes to "feel your pain".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is a reposted joke like a novice chef''s pot roast? It''s way overdone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One good thing about graduation is that you get to wear a funny hat that makes your brain look larger than it actually is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know you can break your nose if you squint hard enough? I did it on the bus today and some Asian guy punched me in the face!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do I do when the Tiger breaks out of its enclosure and bites me? ISUZU', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I loved John Hurt so much... that I''m not even going to make the joke that my heart John Hurts right now. Even though it would make me feel better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a joke''s favorite kind of music? *pun*k rock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did it hurt? "Did what hurt?" "When you fell from heaven and landed on an ugly tree and hit every branch?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So God and the Devil are sitting next to each other on a bench. The Devil reaches over and strangles God, pointing out humanity as proof of God''s fallibility.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call nudes from the 90s hot mail', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom I forgot. Am I special or unique? No son. You''re retarded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the bread during the sacrament represents Jesus'' body... ...why don''t we nail the bread to the table?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when a ghost takes a crap? Rectoplasm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man calls a doctor Man to Doctor : Help, my friend has fallen dead! Doctor: First of all, make sure he''s really dead *sound of a gunshot* Man: Ok, what do I do now?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris threw an impact grenade and killed one hundred people. Then the grenade blew up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if your girlfriend is choking ? Back up a few inches', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two gay judges? They tried each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do terrorists in Antarctica love being interrogated? Snow boarding is fun as hell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little black boy is in the kitchen helping his mom She accidently knocks the flour over and covers the little boy. He says to his mom " look mom I''m white!" She smacks him and busts his lip, then she tells him to go tell his father what he said. The little boy goes to his father and says " look dad I''m white!" he hits him so hard he falls to the ground. The father tells him to go tell his grandma what he just said. The little boy goes to his grandma and says "look nana I''m white" she hits him so hard he passes out. When the little boy finally comes to he says " I''ve only been white for 10 minutes and I already hate all you niggers!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been single for a while now and I''m staring to realize something. They blur out A lot of Asian porn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2016 had many celebrity deaths.. ..but 2017 will Hurt the most. :(', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('South Park / Secret life of Pets mashup One dog said to another come here and watch these sticks. The other dog came and looked for the sticks but didnt see the sticks anywhere so he asked where these sticks were located. Their eyes met and the first dog said: did you think i meant these sticks? I meant these fick sticks"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a psychologist and a dentist? One treats mental disorders... and the other treats dental mis-orders.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy has a massive crush on a girl A guy has a massive crush on this girl. He is so enchanted by her that every time he see''s her he gets an instant boner. In order to avoid any embarassment from an obvious boner he decides to call the girl and ask her out over the phone. To his surprise she agrees almost instantly and they make plans. As soon as he hangs up he thinks, "shit, what am I gonna do, I''ll get a boner as soon as I see her and she''ll never talk to me again." So like a man, he finds the perfect solution to him problem. He duct tapes and ties his dick to his leg. On date night, he goes to her door, double checks his work with a patt on his leg, check. He rings her doorbell, she opens the door, and he kicks her in the face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make seven even? Take the s off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The guilty gasser... This happened to me tonight: I was in a restaurant bathroom and a guy let out a pretty normal fart, which he immediately followed up by saying "sorry guys..." I was telling my wife about how weird it was that someone felt the need to apologize for a normal bathroom function. Without missing a beat, she asked: "...did he sound deflated?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is my period story Period. End of story.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? "Firetruck" ...What were you thinking? What starts with "P" and ends with "ORN"? "Popcorn" ..What were you thinking?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when two well endowed astrophysicists have a gay sword fight? A Large Hardon Collider.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A penguin has car trouble.. A penguin is driving along the highway when, suddenly his engine starts running rough and he sees smoke in his rear view mirror. He pulls off the highway and finds the nearest service station, and pulls up to the garage with the car shaking and sputtering. He tells the mechanic what happened, and the mechanic says "OK, give me 10 minutes to check it out." Meanwhile, the penguin sees an ice cream shop across the street. Thinking this is a perfect time for a tasty treat, he heads over and gets himself an ice cream cone. After he finishes, he walks back over to the garage, and asks the mechanic "So, did you find out what''s wrong?" The mechanic looks at the penguin and says "It looks like you blew a seal." The penguin quickly wipes his face and says "Oh, no, that''s just the ice cream."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Daughter''s Dance Class Apparently, it''s not acceptable to ask a mom if her daughter''s dance class has horizontal or vertical brass poles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you guys know what love is? Love is when your heart melts and comes out the tip of your penis', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know why Trump fans are called Trumpettes? You only have to learn how to press three buttons, and then you can play ''em all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no headache tablets in the jungle? Because the parrots-eat-em-all', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a womans favorite game? Pool (billiards)... It''s the only one with a kitchen!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell a boy tree from a girl tree? Boy trees have woodpeckers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a pack of pencils and one was unsharpened. I thought it was pretty pointless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a new black router today... I think I''m gonna name it Martin Router King', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid: why is my cousin named Diamond? Mother: because your auntie really loves diamonds Kid: well what about my name? Mother: never mind about that Richard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I almost had to go the hospital today because a stranger threw a can of Pepsi at me... I''m just glad it was a soft drink. Otherwise, I would have had to get surgery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? Art.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once quit drinking, smoking and having sex with random women... ...these were the two most horrible minutes of my life!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which President had the shortest term? Grover Cleveland. He was the twenty second President.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People ask me why I don''t have a facebook and I tell them I''m tired of people questioning everything that I do... It''s always "Jim, where were you between 10pm and 4am on Saturday night?" and "Jim, do you know the person shown in this picture?" and "Jim, does this hammer with the blood of the deceased person in this picture belong to you?" I just don''t need it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('a man and a woman who had never met before but were both married to other people found themselves assigned to the same sleeping compartment on a trans-continental train. though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper bunk and she in the lower. at 1 a.m., the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, "ma''am, I''m sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet and get me a second blanket? I''m awfully cold." "i have a better idea," she replied. "just for tonight, let''s pretend that we''re married." "wow! that''s a great idea!" he exclaimed. "good," she replied. "get your own fucking blanket." after a moment of silence, he farted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sven and Olly Sven and Olly have a cow, Margaritte, who stops drinking water and is about to die of dehydration. In a stroke of genius, the duo grab a hose and take Margaritte to the stream. While Sven holds Margaritte''s head in the water, Olly jams the hose into her butt and starts sucking. They figure this will pull the water up through the cow, saving her life. Olly gets winded pretty quick though and asks Sven to come do the sucking while Olly will hold Margaritte''s head underwater. Sven comes back, grabs the hose, pulls it out of Margaritte, spins it around and puts the end Olly was sucking on into Margaritte, and begins sucking on the other end. Olly gasps and says "What are you doing?!" Sven says "I aint be sticking my lips where you be sticking yours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three kinds of people in this world Those that can count and those that cannot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get the fuss over Trump''s "alternative facts" He''s just alt-right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a chocolate maker who has a dick dad? Will-Ivanka', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIFU By forgetting my wife was allergic to seafood when I got her supper from Subway Woops, wrong Sub.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the similarity between a pizza delivery guy and a gynecologist? They both work with crust.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a starship captain who empties space septic tanks? William Shartner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a woman in a bathtub and a woman in a church? The woman in church has hope in her soul.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was hiking once with my girlfriend I was hiking once with my girlfriend. Suddenly a huge brown bear was charging at us, really mad. We must have come close to her cubs. Luckily I had my 9mm pistol with me. One shot to my girlfriend''s kneecap was all it took. I could walk away at a comfortable pace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In all fairness, Trump can''t release his tax returns At least not until Putin sends him his W2s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only difference between Hitler and Stalin... is that I know who Hitler is. Credit- Community', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I said hello to a feminist... my court trial is tomorrow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alcohol is nothing but poison But I drink because there are just things inside of me that need to die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sumo wrestler''s gaze? The thousand lard stare', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Teen aged boys so good at fishing? Because they''re Master Baiters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do gay nerds say goodbye on friday? Have a nice geekend!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a woman tels you it''s five minutes, then it''s five minutes. Don''t need to ask her every quarter of an hour.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a smelly fellow that makes bad jokes? Pungent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks down a street with his dog Stranger: hey that''s a nice dog Man: yes but I''m afraid I''m going to have to put him down Stranger: ah how sad, why so? Man: he''s fucking heavy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Middle Eastern sheepherder say when he was asked what animal he was herding Islam', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting a prostate exam doesn''t make you gay... Unless you spend all day studying for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was relaxing on a long train ride. When the train started to shudder and shake. This was normal, the man didn''t even open his eyes. However, it went on for about 3 minutes, tossing and turning and when it finally stopped, he asked the ticket man what had happened. "I am sorry sir, we ran over a rabbit" "A rabbit? It lasted for a few minutes!" "I know sir, we had to chase it through 2 fields!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a pirates least favorite letter? Dear sir, Your internet service has been disconnected due to terms of service violations and excessive downloading. Please return modem and accessories to your nearest Comcast location. Sincerely, Comcast', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a penguin Drinking his coffee a police officer watches a man walking down the block with a leashed penguin. He goes outside to confront the offender. "Take that penguin to the zoo or you''re going to jail" "We are on the way now" Uninterested in the penguin ruining his car, he let the man go on his way. The next day the man walked by with no penguin. Baffled, he confronted him again. "Where''s the penguin I thought I told you to take him to the zoo? "I did." "Well then where the hell is he now?" "Still there protesting with the other animals."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A book fell on my head a moment ago... I can only blame my shelf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My colleagues call me the pussy slayer... I''m in charge of euthanising cats at the kennel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come newspapers make so much money? Because they make money off Paper Views', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman runs into a doctors office... and says DOCTOR! DOCTOR! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts! The doctor replied, Show me. So the woman poked her ankle and screamed of pain. Then she poked her knee and yelled OW. She poked her forehead and screamed again. She was about to continue when the doctor said, Thats enough, let me think this over. He thought for about a minute and said I think I know what your problem is. You broke your finger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The March for Life is all fine and well..... But why are we forgetting the January and February for Life?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump impression I showed my gf my Donald Trump impression and she hated it. She got the last laugh though, turns out its the wrong time of the month to grab her by the pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not Horny..... A trucker who has been out on the road for two weeks stops at a brothel outside Atlanta. He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down $500 and says, "I want your ugliest woman and a grilled cheese sandwich!" The Madam is astonished. "But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my finest ladies and a three-course meal." The trucker replies, "Listen, I ain''t horny. I''m homesick."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Blondes and the Bermuda triangle have in common? They both swallow a lot of Seamen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Minnesota''s worst air disaster occurred earlier today... ...when a Cessna 152, a small two-seater plane, crashed into a Norwegian cemetery there early this morning. Ole and Sven, working as search and rescue workers, have recovered 826 bodies so far, and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jew family invites guests for dinner There is bread on the table but no one''s touching that. Jew from the kitchen: - Should I bring the chicken now? Another jew shouts back: - No, they haven''t finished bread yet !! Guests quickly eat the bread. Jew brings in the chicken and it finishes all the bread crumbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does u/sername do at a grocery store? Username checks out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to prison and met my cell mate. He asks me,"Do you want the top, or bottom bunk?" Surprised, I replied,"I''ll have the top bunk." His next question is ,"Do you want to be mommy, or daddy?" "Daddy," I say, obviously... "Okay, get over here and sit on mommy''s dick." Edit: mommy''s dick is possesive', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what grinds a Germans gear? Nothing, they are too well engineered. Edit: Spelling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now that Donald Trump is actually building the wall, I hear Mexicans are depressed I''m sure they''ll soon get over it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know why a gun is better than a wife? You can put a silencer on a gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does trump wear a tie? If he takes it off, the foreskin flies up over his head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Germans favorite letter? I don''t know but it''s Nazi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control? A trip without the kids', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most popular sport in northern Spain? Basquetball', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guess what! Chicken butt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the pizza palor owner who got busted for child porn? He was a real pizza shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One thing our presidents have never owned. a vagina.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Hitler''s favorite color to use when painting? Aryan white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexico: Knock Knock DonaldTrump: Who''s there? Mexico: Taco Trump: Taco who? Mexico: Knock Knock Trump: Who''s there? Mexico: Taco Trump: TACO WHO!!! Mexico: Knock Knock Trump: Who''s there? Mexico: Orange Trump: Orange who? Mexico: Orange you glad we didn''t rape You with a Taco full of drugs (Insert thread far funnier than this joke here)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy says to God: "God... ... to you a minute is like a million years and a penny is like a million dollars. So, could you give me a penny?" God replies "Sure, in a minute"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked a Chinese girl for her number... She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free Sex Tonight! I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cat is walking home alongside a stream When he sees a sausage floating down it. Not to miss an opportunity he pulls it out with his paw and takes it home for his wife and kittens for supper. The next day he decides to walk by the stream again, as luck would have it there''s another sausage but this time bigger than the last. It takes two paws into pull it out, then takes it home to feed his wife and kittens. The following day he sees an even bigger sausage this time he reaches in and it takes him 3 paws to pull it out almost slipping in and getting wet. Again his family is loving it. The very next night on the way home a monster of a sausage floating down the stream. It takes all 4 paws to pull it from the water. Of course the cat falls in. The moral of the story, the bigger the sausage the wetter the pussy! (I''ve known this joke since I was 13. So it might be a bit immature for you guys)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I remember one day I was at Grandpa''s farm and I asked him about sex. He sort of smiled and said, "Maybe instead of telling you what sex is, why don''t we go out to the horse pasture and I''ll show you." So we did, and there on the ground were my parents having sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a synthesizer-guitar that''s out of tune? A Synthaxe error!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a tight pair of pants and a cheap motel have in common? No ballroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m giving up alcohol for a month. Wait, that came out wrong. I''m giving up. Alcohol for a month.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in a job interview today. The interviewing manager handed me his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me." ... So I put the laptop under my arm, walked out of the building, and went home. Eventually he called my mobile and said, "Bring it back here right now!" I said, "$200 and it''s yours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the german sausage?... ....just as well, it was the wurst.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Israeli doctor says "In Israel, medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man''s liver put them on another man, and in 6 weeks, he is looking for work." The German doctor says: "That''s nothing, in Germany we take part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for work." The Russian doctor says: "Gentlemen, we take half a heart from a man, put it in another''s chest, and in 2 weeks he is looking for work." The American doctor laughs: "You all are behind us. Two days ago, we took a man with no brains, no heart, and no liver and made him President. Now, the whole country is looking for work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the person who graduated last in their class from medical school? Doctor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kaddish is a hymn of praises to God found in a Jewish prayer service. What is its Muslim equivalent? A kaboom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a terrorist''s favourite melee weapon? A boomerang.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Offensive] A Muslim an Atheist and a Hindu get stuck on the side of a road. A nearby farmer decides to let them stay at his house but he only has two beds so he says one of them will have to sleep in the barn. The Atheist volunteers first and goes to sleep in the barn. However he knocks at the door of the house 15 minutes later and complains that he can''t take the smell. The Hindu offers to take his place because he is used to bad smells from his childhood in India. However less than 5 minutes later the Hindu knocks at the door of the house and explains he cannot sleep there because there is a cow in the barn and they are too sacred to sleep by in his religion. Finally the Muslim offers to take his place in the barn. Much to the farmers annoyance there is one more knock at the door and the now very angry farmer is surprised to see his goat in shock at the door. "I can''t sleep in there, man..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a dove represents peace which bird represents true love? The swallow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend cheated. Never playing Texas Hold ''Em with her ass again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m actually reasonably happy with Trump''s presidency right now..... after all, he''s had the nuclear codes for a couple of days now and hasn''t tweeted them yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much cocaine can Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently wrote a book about Poltergeists... I''m pleased to say they''re flying off the shelves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do ants not go to church? Because they are in sects!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Left my wife because of another woman.... Her mother !!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do the french like roller coasters? Weee weee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So you think your dad is an alcoholic? You should see my liquor cabinet!! Haha...ha... Its empty. I need help.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cats make better medical technicians than dogs? Because dogs can''t operate MRI machines, but catscan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To whomever stole my copy of Microsoft Word... I will find you. You have my Word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TIL that my neighbors really like the metal song i''m playing on my 7.1 sound system I figured because he thrown a brick at my window to hear it better ! \m/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always thought that the brain was the most important organ Now that I think about it, what''s telling me that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that Donald Trump actually has a beautiful full head of hair? It''s an alternative fact!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best thing about having a penis... is sharing it with people who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a robotic contraceptive? Intelligent Protection Neutralizer for Girls, otherwise known as I P N Girls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I heard that my toaster wasn''t water resistant... I was shocked!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is watching the news with her husband..... A blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says, "Six Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident." The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing, "That''s horrible!" Confused, he replies, "Yes Dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is always that risk involved." After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, "How many is a Brazilian?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the butcher that backed into his meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dyslexic friend sobbed uncontrollably as he confessed that he kept spelling his own name backwards I really do feel for Bob.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the deaf teacher give his deaf students their homework instructions? He assigned it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A radio station in Ireland is taking calls to find a word that is commonly used but isn''t in the dictionary yet... The first caller get''s through, "Hello! What word do you think should be in the dictionary?" "Goan!" "Goan? Can you use it in a sentence?" "Yeah, go''an fuck yerself!" The caller then begins laughing until the station can cut off his call. After several more calls they get another man, "And what''s your word sir?" "Smee!" "Can you use it in a sentence?" "Aye! S''mee again! Go''an fuck yerself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Hillary do when she loses a game of CS:GO? She blames the Russians.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a robot do during sex? He nuts and bolts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was sitting in traffic today and I got run over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump hates saying "yes" to Mexicans so much We may as well call him the "Not Si" President', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I really like Trump and his policies. But I also would really like to see the end of the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to water his garden... He didn''t have a hose or a watering can, so he improvised by filling a bucket with water and throwing it all over the garden. However, when he did so, the water only landed on every other plant. Shocked, the man threw his arms up in the air and shouted "water the odds!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the malfunctioning register at the liquor store? Everything''s coming up ros''s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and doesn''t work? Decaf coffee you racist fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the English teacher propose to Webster? She wanted to Merriam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are we having chicken tonight? OK, well keep me abreast of that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It must be very confusing to have sex with William Shatner. You never know if he loves it or hates it. No, don''t, stop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found out I can''t cross the border while wearing a long sleeve shirt... Apparently, you aren''t allowed to carry concealed weapons across the border.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Refrigerator rabbit A man opens his refrigerator and is shocked to see a rabbit inside. He asks the rabbit, "What on earth are you doing in there?!" The rabbit says "this refrigerator is a Westinghouse, isn''t it?" Confused, the man says "well, yeah, so?" The rabbit replies "well, I''m westing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor says I need to avoid trans fats I''m really going to miss Tumblr', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus tried to solve a Rubik''s cube He died on the cross.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the strongest days of the week? Saturday and Sunday, the rest are weekdays. I know, I know... even I''m ashamed of myself for posting this!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a religious person testifies in court... ...does that mean they''re a Jehovah Witness?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reddit censorship is getting out of hand [removed]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don''t know what he laced them with, but I''ve been tripping all day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a feminist and a bomb vest? A bomb vest does something when triggered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Boba Fett''s favorite magazine? Sarlacc Digest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This morning I was sitting on a park bench next to a homeless black man. I started a conversation by asking him how he ended up this way. He said, "Up until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to eat, my clothes were washed and pressed, I had a roof over my head, I had TV and Internet, and I went to the gym, the pool, and the library. "I was working on my MBA on-line. I had no bills and no debt. I even had full medical coverage." I felt sorry for him, so I asked, "What happened? Drugs? Alcohol? Divorce?" "Oh no, nothing like that," he said. "I was released from prison."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate eating vegetables... The wheelchair is always getting in the way', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that psychic dwarf that escaped from prison? They''re a small medium at large', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Eminem serve weak coffee? You only get one shot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student walks up to their teacher. Student: "Teacher, would you ever get mad at me for something I didn''t do?" Teacher: "Of course not! why?" Student: "Because I didn''t do my homework"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(long) All the knights in the Kingdom we''re leaving for the Crusade. One knight told his trusty servant, "My bride is the most beautiful woman in the country. If I die, I do not want such beauty to be wasted. So I''m leaving you the key to her chastity belt to be used if I do not return from my journey." The knights had only gone a short distance when they heard a horse charging up behind them. Thinking it might be an important message, the men halted. The horseman who approached was the Knight''s servant. "hey" he said. "You gave me the wrong key!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid: "Mom, am I ugly?" *Mom:* "I told you not to call me mom in public."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girlfriend told me to f*ck her like a man So I put it in her ass and called her Jeff', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I support equal rights Equal rights = Equal fights', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a thief and a pervert? A thief ~~steals~~ snatches your watch, a pervert watches your snatch. EDIT: I''ve done fucked it up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl really wants to borrow her step-dad''s Porsche So she goes and asks him if it''d be okay to use it for the night. The step-dad, being the pig that he is, says "I''ll let you borrow it if you suck my dick." At first she is repulsed by this but then starts thinking of how cool she would look in a Porsche for the night with her friends. "Alright but you can NOT tell anyone about this"! "Of course" he says. She begins but is quickly disgusted and pulls away. "Oh my god, your dick tastes like shit" she yells. The step-dad snaps his fingers "that''s right, your brother has the Porsche tonight".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a seals favorite tool to use? A club as it seals the deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man marries a Chinese restaurant waitress... On their wedding night, she says to him - Bride: "Dear husband, I want to give you anything you want! Just name it!" Groom: "Ooh, that''s tough to chose. OK, I really want a sixty nine." Bride (confused): "You want beef broccoli *now*?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Hunters make the best lovers? They go deep in the bush, shoot more than once and eat what they shoot at.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you titillate an ocelot? You oscillate its tits a lot. (What number is this old joke?)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 3.14 meter long snake ! What do you call a 3.14 meter long snake ? - a "Py"thon What do you call a 43 kilometre long snake ? - a marathon !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I took this babe back to my place. . . . . . for a solid three and a half minutes of shagging. We''re lying there afterwards and she asks, "Why don''t you have a clock in your bedroom?" "I do have a clock - a wall clock." "What''s a wall clock?" So I bang on the wall. From next door a voice, "Hey asshole! Don''t you know it''s 3 in the morning?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call three Mexicans that jumped the border? Trespassers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two wrongs don''t make a right But two wrights make an airplane', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a grocery store and my crush? I can get a date from the grocery store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To whom was Shia LaBeouf chanting "*He will not divide us*" after he got arrested yesterday? His buttcheeks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do women fake orgasms ? Because they think we care. :P', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother is a 10 On the Richter scale When she walks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the iguana get it up? He had a reptile dysfunction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is a door not a door? When it''s ajar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the year 2040 Barron Trump runs for president of USA His platform: THE DOME.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Buddhist monk say when he approached the hotdog stand? Make me one with everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the definition of relative humidity? When the sweat from your balls runs down the crack of your sisters ass ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Armies are Matched Against Each Other Both armies are rather large in size, and have been fighting on the front for many days. Both sides are running very low on ammo, and have already run out of ammunition for their cannons, so they continue to fire with their rifles. Eventually, all of the ammo for their rifles runs out. A private runs up to his general: "General, we''ve used all of our ammunition! The only form of defense we have is our fists!" "Our fists?" "Yes, sir!" "Well," said the General, "I have a plan. We''ll have all of our troops line up, run collectively up to the enemy, and then, once we approach them, we''ll beat them up! They''ll never see that coming!" The private smiles. "That''s a great idea, sir!" "I''ll put it into action," the General said. He yelled loudly to all of his troops: "Okay men, let''s set up a punchline!" (I''m so sorry)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I started investing in Egyptian tourism Until I realized it was just a pyramid scheme', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Forget everything you learned in college... ''Forget everything you learned in college. You won''t need it working here.'' ''But I never went to college.'' ''Well then, I''m sorry. You are underqualified to work here.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trumps is not a thief! He makes alternative purchases', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the opposite of progress? The president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do vaginas have taste buds? Why else would they make flavored condoms?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a gospel singer say to clear his/her throat? a hymn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the French Revolution just like Prohibition? They both got rid of Bourbon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muslim book store in New York: A man asks if they have the latest Donald Trump book on immigration. "Fuck off, get out and don''t come back" says the store owner. "That''s the one!" says the man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of fish is made of two Sodium atoms 2 Na', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The French are debating leaving the E.U. Just like them to run when things get bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do Reavers clean their harpoons? They put them through the Wash.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Freudian slip A couple goes to therapy to try and solve some problems in their marriage. The counselor says that maybe by recounting their morning routine, they can find some unconscious signs revealing deep-set issues. The husband responds, "Well, this morning, something peculiar happened. I was going to ask my wife to pass the butter, but instead of saying ''pass the butter'', I said ''GODDAMMIT WOMAN YOU''RE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I judge Usain Bolt based on his race All of his races, actually.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw an iPhone store get robbed... I guess now I''m an iWitness.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do a German soldier''s hands never get cold? Because they''ve gott mit-uns', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new corduroy pillows? They''re making headlines!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like parking spaces... The best ones are usually taken, so when no one is looking, stick it in the disabled one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what grinds my gears? Do you know what grinds my gears? I have to read the aforementioned title twice for most jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my American friend the truth about living in North Korea... and now I''m typing this message from a Coffin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the least subtle way to intimate that you are interested in coital relations? Thrust and say: I am in... Wink and say: to mate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three jews walk into a bar I lied, it was a gas chamber', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once this whole "global warming thing" melts the ice caps We''re gonna have a canoe world order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the car enthusiast have trouble getting a BMW tattoo on his belly? Because he had an Audi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hard candy At the horse races, the inspector observes that a coach is giving something to one of the horses. Inspector: - What is this pill?! - This is just some hard candy. I eat them, and this horse likes them as well. Want to try? - Well, why not... Before the start of the race the coach tells his jockey: - To avoid any suspicions, stay in the middle until the last lap. At the end, you should be able to overtake everybody easily. If someone is about to overtake you, don''t worry, it''s either me or the inspector.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best part about living in a black family? You never have to hear a dad joke. Edit. Just thought of this at work one day hope it''s not a repost', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to buy some condoms today, and I said to the pharmacist, ''Excuse me, I need some condoms.'' He said, ''Just a minute.'' And I said, ''Yep, that''s my brand.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Photographers are so violent. They''ll frame you, shoot you, blow you up and then hang you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People at work say i''m unnecessarily rude ... but i say fuck those cunts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the rooster cross the road? To get to the other year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is working on word problems with her students A teacher is working on word problems with her students and asks, "if there are 3 birds on a fence and you shoot one, how many are left?" A boy raises his hand and says, "zero. Because if you shoot one the other two fly away" The teacher responds, "no, there''s two left but that''s creative and I like the way you think." After that the boy says "ok, three women are sitting on a bench eating ice cream. One is biting it, one is licking it, and one is sucking it. Which woman is married?" The teacher says, "well I guess the one sucking it." The boy replies, "no, it''s the one wearing a wedding ring but I like the way you think."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A drummer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Two: one to change the light bulb, and another to hold the ladder. Safety is important, you racist fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what kind of work do you do? "I move cows" "Oh , so you''re a rancher?" "Not really , I''m a zumba instructor"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On her deathbed my wife said, "Sweety, I will see you in Heaven." Since then I have kicked a puppy, stole from 4 shops and set fire to an orphanage.!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than a girl falling asleep during sex? A girl waking up during sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girls always tell me that I have the body of and greek god ...At least when it comes to the dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just went to Taco Bell Got 6 tacos and a drink, the bill was $6,823.54', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the houses that fell in love? They had a lawn-distance relationship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Couples, the key to keeping your bedroom fresh Febreze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Toughest time of my Life I had the toughest time of my life. First, I got angina pectoris and then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering from these, I got tuberculosis, double pneumonia and phthisis. Then they gave me hypodermics. Appendicitis was followed by tonsillectomy. These gave way to aphasia and hypertrophic cirrhosis. I completely lost my memory for a while. I know I had diabetes and acute ingestion, besides gastritis, rheumatism, lumbago and neuritis... I don''t know how I pulled through it. It was the hardest spelling test I''ve ever had.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to change a bedroom light bulb? None, they just beat the room for being black', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Luxembourg invades France! Luxembourg has begun it''s invasion of France. After some minutes the field report comes to the general : ''''We began advancing as ordered but the woodsmen kicked us out.'''' Furious, the general summons his most trusted advisers: ''''Send the tanks!'''' he sais ''''All of them? the advisers ask The general scratches his chin before committing but then he replies : ''''Both of them!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Australians and wetting yourself in the basement have in common? They''re both incontinence down under.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bacteriologist quit her job? She hated being microbe-managed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my girlfriend told me to treat her like a princess. So I put her in a castle and sent some Italian plummer to find her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Son wanted to borrow Dad''s car A teenager went to his Father and asked if he could borrow the car for a date. The Father sizes him up and says: "Tell you what-you get a proper haircut and I''ll let you use my car. The teenager had long hair and was quite proud of it, so he thought about the offer. The teenager then gets an idea and says to his churchgoing father: "You know Dad, Jesus had long hair just like mine." The father, without skipping a beat, says: "You know what son, you''re right-and Jesus walked everywhere he went."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did they decide to call a correctional facility a penitentiary? Because calling it penetrationary would''ve ruined the surprise.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend treats me like a god She ignores me till she wants to ask for something', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Let''s see Trump try to ban Muslims from entering the US We''ll just make them in our bathtubs like we did during the prohibition!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Trump and Palpatine have in common? They both took power from a black man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our school should start a calculus club We would all derive fun from it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between illegal and unlawful? One is against the law, the other is a sick bird. Thanks folks, tip your waitresses I''ll be here all day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few years ago, I had a friend who was struggling with some mental health issues. A few years ago, I had a friend who was struggling with some mental health issues. She once admitted to me that she was self harming, and even went so far as shoving pieces of sandpaper inside her vagina until she bled. I told her it would be okay and things would get better, it was just a bit of a rough period for her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a neckbeards favorite linux os? Fedora (cricket cricket)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do an uncircumcised penis and the kkk have in common? They''re both pricks in oversized hoods.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the clock break? Because it was ticked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a paedophile and a roller coaster? You have to be a over 5ft to ride a roller coaster', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two carrots are out for a drive in the country Two carrots are out for a drive in the country. They''re having the time of their lives. They''re going fast around the curves and letting the wind in their stalks, just loving it. All of a sudden, they get in a pretty horrific crash and are then rushed to the hospital. One of the carrots is ok, just minor cuts and scrapes, but the other is in pretty bad shape and is rushed into the OR. After hours of operating, the doctor comes out to the other carrot in the waiting room and says, "I''ve got some good news and I''ve got some bad news. The good news is that your friend is going to live. The bad news is that he''s going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just realized why so many car accidents happen in Russia. They''re always Russian around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a agnostic, dyslexic, insomniac? A person who stays up all night wondering if there is a dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to the cannibal who was late for dinner? He got the cold shoulder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A devout Muslim entered a cab in London He curtly asked the cabbie to turn off the radio, because as decreed by his religious teaching, he must not listen to music, because in the time of the prophet there was no music especially western music, which is the music of the infidel. The cab driver politely switched off the radio, stopped the cab, and opened the door. The Arab asked him, "What are you doing?" The cabbie answered, "In the time of the prophet, there were no taxis, so get off and wait for a camel!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can''t make fun of reposted jokes Because they are older than your grandpa and deserve some respect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A General was about to lose in a battle Suddenly a deity came to help and turned the tide to his favor. The general was quite grateful, kneeled down and asked, "What is my savior''s great name?" The deity said, "I''m the god of practice target." The general baffled, asked again, "What merit do I possess, that the God of practice target came to my rescue?" The deity explained, "Well, I came to thank you that you never hurt me on the practice field." Extracted from <> by n}; in Ming dynasty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of music do people with small penises play? D minor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water, Who knows what they did up there, They came down with a daughter. Edit: the -> they', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat... ...NASA has to calculate her into every launch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump is not a rapist. He''s an "alternative romantic."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teenager asks his father to borrow the car... A teenager went to his Father and asked if he could borrow the car for a date. The Father sizes him up and says: "Tell you what: you get a proper haircut and I''ll let you use my car." The teenager had long hair and was quite proud of it, so he thought about the offer. The teenager then gets an idea and says to his churchgoing father: "You know Dad, Jesus had long hair just like mine." The father, without skipping a beat, says: "You know what son, you''re right-and Jesus walked everywhere he went."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The author of the Harry Potter books was trying so hard to be funny. But it wasn''t funny to me. J.K. I was Rowling', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Interviewing for waiter position* I feel like I bring a lot to the table', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep Trump busy for the rest of his term? Tell him his twitter phone is in the corner of his office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call equine prostitute with sore throats? Hoarse horse whores', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('David Copperfield is doing his magic show... ...and asks if anyone would like to show him a trick. "I will", replies a guy in the audience, "but I''m going to need your wife Claudia and a table." "Ok," says David and the guy gets on stage. He then bends Claudia over the table, pulls down her knickers and starts fucking her from behind. David is now very pissed off and says, "That isn''t a trick!!!" The guy just looks at David Copperfield and replies, "I know, it''s Fucking Magic."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do my wife and my math teacher have in common? They both love to create problems that I am apparently supposed to solve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the Difference between a Girl and a Woman? Prison', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I read a sign outside my local primary school saying: "Slow children playing." I thought, fucking hell that can''t do much for their self-esteem, but then I realised that they probably won''t be able to read it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about that guy who got run over by a steam train? He was chuffed to bits', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend kept asking to be treated like a princess (fixed) So for Valentines day, I surprised her with a fairytale trip to Paris. On the second night we dined at the most beautiful restaurant and after a few drinks I could see the love in her eyes, she was happy, a bit tipsy and giving me that "I''ll deal with you later look". Excited, I requested the bill and we rushed to the car. We''re messing around in the back seats and just as we''re about to reach the end of the tunnel I stop, lock my eyes on hers, she lets out a little gasp as an empty Jack Daniels bottle rolls out from under the driver seat. The chauffeur is hammered, we''re spinning out of control and smash into a bridge support killing us all instantly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are condoms like cameras? They capture your special moments.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend''s dog is starting to act like just like my girlfriend Like she hates it when I cum on her face', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Putin, Trump and Merkel are all at a seaside resort having an argument... The topic of the debate is which country has the best submarines. Putin begins, saying "Russian submarines are best in the world! They can stay submerged for weeks at a time before needing supplies." Trump laughs, "Oh no no, AMERICAN submarines are the best in the world. I know it, you know it, everybody knows it! They can go for months without needing supplies!" Merkel opens her mouth to speak, but is interrupted by a large submarine emerging from the water. The hatch opens, and a sailer shouts at them, "Sieg Heil! We need fuel!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the calendar nervous? His days were numbered', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today my dad asked what I was talking to "My imaginary friend" "Oh what''s their name?" "Womens rights"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good nurse always carries a pen A nurse was walking the ward when she noticed a rectal thermometer in her shirt pocket. "Some arsehole has my pen", she muttered to herself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('favorite movie quote of all time *"Use the force Harry"* ~*Gandalf*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are so many businessmen fat? Must be all the inflation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All in a nights work A guy meets a sex worker in a bar. She says, This is your lucky night. Ive got a special game for you. Ill do absolutely anything you want for 300 as long as you can say it in three words. The guy replies, Hey, why not? He pulls his wallet out of his pocket and lays 300 on the bar, and says slowly. Paint&my&.house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if someone is vegan? They''ll tell you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When, and only then, is it okay to spit into your girlfriend''s face? In case her moustache is on fire!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I buy every comic book I see. . . My friends say I have lots of issues.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you fit 6 million Jews into a car? Send them to clown school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love how when your watching a crime show and they have to tell you that "this is a reenactment". Oh really? You mean you didn''t actually catch the murder on video?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think my new dog thinks he is a blacksmith As soon as I took him inside he made a bolt for the door', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the work of a renowned geologist? Rock solid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend David lost his ID yesterday... We just call him Dav now', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much citrus does it take to kill a pirate? None.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are women terrible drivers? Because making sandwiches behind the wheel is a lot harder than making them in the kitchen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman : All men are dogs. Me : Which breed is your dad, bitch?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sex life is just like Star Wars It''s either Han Solo, or I have to use force.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best way to break a shield apart? Seth Rollins with a chair', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a hooker with good manners say after fucking her customer| "I''m so glad you came"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Being a father completely changed me. I''m one of those motherfuckers now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Alamaba boy married a Mississippi girl On their wedding night the girl says to her husband "please be gentle in a virgin." The man became disgusted and walked out of the house. Later at dinner he tells his family what happened. "You made the right choice" said his father "if she ain''t good enough for her brothers she sure as hell ain''t good enough for you"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a southern girl who runs faster than her brothers A virgin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A city girl meets a country boy in a restaurant When the buy asked her out she responded "oh I know you country boys will fuck anything that walks. Pigs, chickens, goats and horses." The boy made a disgusted grin. "chickens???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A poor mexican went to a hill to pray for a way to feed his family As he was praying a black guy was walking nearby with groceries when he dropped his cheese wheel and it rolled to the Mexican. The Mexican grabbed it, praised god, and ran home. When he gets home he instructs his wife to make nachos with the cheese. "Why nachos" asks his wife "we can make so many better meals with this cheese" "No" said the Mexican "god instructs me to make nachos." "What do you mean" asked the wife "As I was praying God sent me the cheese wheel and as I was running home with it I heard him yelling That''s Nacho cheese, that''s nacho cheese!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump has just signed ANOTHER executive order it''s about foreign birds of prey. the order states that any bird, specifically eagles, who have some sort of illness like flu will not be allowed to enter the country. Trump has labelled them - ILL EAGLE IMMIGRANTS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me to fuck her like a man. So I stuck it in her ass and called her Steve', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my friends I had a date with a really attractive girl... they told me she was imaginary, but the jokes on them, because they are too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Browser joke What do we want? Chrome/Firefox: Faster internet! When do we want it? Internet explorer: Faster internet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why Would Clint Eastwood be Bad at Restructuring a Business? He can''t remember if he fired 5 or 6.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you all alright?? -YEEES - says audience -No you are all alleft', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought about making a cripple joke... ... but it would be lame.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whoever hates oral... Can just suck my dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do for a living? Nothing edit: just to be clear this isn''t me. The depth of this joke is big', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister died in a car crash She did always want to be a princess', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is so good about dead baby jokes? They never get old', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shout out to tears for fears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I got into an argument she said ''you should treat me like I''m the last woman on earth'' I said- what, lock you down in the basement and let men cum on your face for a million dollars?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a phobia of machetes? Common sense', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The CEO of Ryanair, walks into a pub... Michael O''Leary, the CEO of Ryanair, walks into a pub. The he says to the bartender "Can I have a pint of beer?" The bartender says "Certainly, that''ll be 0.50" He responds with "50 cents? That''s wonderfully cheap!" But then the bartender tells him "And it''ll be 1 for the glass, 3 if you want to sit down, 7 if you stand up, 15 to use the loo... "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long has Michael J. Fox had Parkinson''s disease? About 30 years, just amazing, thought he would have shaken it off by now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend was bleeding, and the first aid book told me to apply pressure. So I told him if he didn''t stop bleeding right away, he''d die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got kicked out of the library today I got kicked out of the library for putting the women''s rights book in the fiction section', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and my friend used to like playing war growing up one day i went to his parents house and told them their son died', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have beef- -aroni.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a video game developer who''s not that hard? Ubisoft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You cant expect an honest person to beat Usain Bolt... Only a cheetah can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[NSFW] What is the worst part about eating a bald pussy? Putting the diaper back on when you''re done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 20999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Eminem made of? He is made of Mathers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was fed up with being burgled and robbed every other day in my neighbourhood... The alarm system was of no use so I tore it out and deregistered from our ineffective local Neighbourhood Watch. Instead, I''ve Planted a Syrian, Afghanistan, Yemeni and Iranian flag in four corners of my front garden. Now, The city police, The National Security Bureau, MI-5, MI-6, The CIA And Every Other Intelligence Service In Europe... Are All keeping watch on my house 24x7 x 365..... I''m followed to and from work every day and my wife too when she goes out shopping. So no one bothers us at all...I''ve never felt safer. All Thanks To these Flags!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what the scientific name of Viagra is? Mycoxafloppin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a clan for chickens? Coo clucks clan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Potter household Voldemort: knock knock James: who''s there? Voldemort: you know James: you know who? Voldemort: correct James: James: Fuck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He drank the coffee before it was cool =', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of fishing line is best for taking out a group of 1st graders? A Sandy Hook Yes, I''m sorry. Yes, I stole this from Facebook', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So who was the first knight at the round table? Cir-cumference!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom named her vacuum Slayer It''s been around since 1981 and has fucking sucked ever since.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A crossfitter, a Texan, and a vegan walk into a bar. How do you know? They all tell you within 3 seconds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad Dad Joke So my Dad told me this joke that was so bad, he only told it to me once. "I''ll be right back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a post on r/Jokes is unoriginal? It makes the front page.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An apple a day... Keeps the non-binary away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I knocked up my Jewish girlfriend; Now we have a little Jew in the over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Slept like a log last night Woke up in the fireplace.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Its a heart joke to tell Doctor: Sir, you need a heart transplant! Patient: oh no! What can be done! Doctor: we have two hearts available; 1. Is from a healthy donor who was very fit and was young. It is $10,000 2. Is from an obese, lazy alcoholic who did heroin. It is $20,000 Patient: why is the alcoholic''s more expensive? Doctor: he was a lawyer; it''s never been used.. Sorry if it has been told; can''t be arsed to find out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which bees produce milk? The boo-bees!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the jazz fan name his pachyderms? He called his elephants Gerald.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the kid with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves! Nah, just kidding. He hasn''t unwrapped it yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New movie coming out about a golden retriever who helps a deaf boy. It''s called "Ear Bud."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old guy An old guy with his 80''s went to the doctor for a check up. Doctor asks -How is your life going on how do you feel? Man replies: - Everything perfect. I feel great. I just married with an 18 years old. And you know what she is pregnant. Doctor nods his head and - Let me tell you a story. - there was this guy who enjoys hunting deers with his gun. That day he took his umbrella instead of the rifle. He saw a nice deer just behind the woods , aimed and bum. Deer was shot felt to the ground. The old guy shouts - Come on that''s not possible someone else should have done it. Doctor: - You are absolutely right!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mexico''s president says he will not go to the U.S. for a meeting with Trump The wall''s not even finished and it kept a Mexican out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Irish lumberjack. An Irishman wanted to start a logging business. Since he couldn''t possibly make as much money felling trees by himself as he would with some workers helping him, he put out a simple ad flyer in town square: tree fellers needed. Later in the day, two other Irishmen, Sean and Patrick, walk by and notice the ad. Sean turns to Patrick and says "if only Seamus was with us, then we would get the job"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Princess Diana has dandruff? They found her Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me to treat her like a princess... So I crashed her into a wall', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some day, Canada will take over the world. And then we''ll all be sorry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m going to start calling my roommates dog Dray After Draymond Green, because there is no way that is part of her natural jumping motion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whilst laying in bed with my girlfriend I turned to her to say "I love you so"... She replied, "I love you so too!" We then proceeded to discuss how one could not love Yoo So, for our Chinese friend is nothing but a delight to be around! *Works better said aloud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a KKK member''s favorite game? Hangman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had a dollar for every time someone over 40 told me my generation sucks... Then I could afford a house in the economy they ruined.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a lot I don''t get about women The main thing being their phone number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Asked my dad what he thought about my new haircut... He said it was "obsolete", so I told him that I was actually a trendsetter. He said "Yes. That trend set many years ago".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you tell a nazi with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told Richard Spencer twice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come you never see third class mail? Third class envelopes are disproportionately likely to be lost in the voyage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LPT: How to stop procrastinating Step one: Prepare to do whatever it is that you need to do Step two: Do it tomorrow. This frees you from the work you would have done grudgingly, which decreases the quality anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much do noodles cost? How much do noodles cost? About a penne.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s another name for a Japanese demon dog? A pupper-oni.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We''re two days into the Chinese New Year, the year of the rooster and I''m still writing year of the monkey on my checks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I have this dilemma... I have an unopened box of condoms in my dresser, but I check recently and it turns out they expired. Now idk if I should buy more or not because on one hand I want to be prepared but on the other hand I don''t want to waste another $7', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whale junior: Dad, where did I come from? Papa whale: From my penis. Whale junior: Umm thanks? Papa whale: You''re whalecum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What movie did Trump watch with his family tonight? Wall-E', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, I''ve got to masturbate. "Two maths debate! I knew I had high expectaisians!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do European generals keep their armies? In their sleevies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do we want! "Hearing aids!" "When do we want them!" "Hearing aids!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Welcome to jim''s seafood shack and brothel... (nsfw) The crabs are buy one get one free', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Nsfw] How do you know you have a high sperm count? She has to chew before swallowing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can we not have sex tonight? I''m tired "Hi Tired, I''m dad"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binary, and those who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a donkeys favourite breakfast cereal? Mule-sli', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not that Trump is a traitor. He''s an "alternative patriot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Mexican midget barbers favorite restaurant? Little Cesar''s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Pikachu was a Nazi... ...would his name be Gasajew?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not bashing Trump I''m providing "alternate praise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried singing for my supper today. Looks like I''m having rotten tomato soup tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know why I drink apple juice? Because OJ will kill you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the underwear of someone experiencing nocturnal emissions? Dreamcatchers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like I like my coffee I don''t like coffee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the third hand on a clock? Second hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had my FIRST THREE WAY!!! There were a couple of no-shows, but I STILL HAD A GREAT TIME!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do lexicographers compile dictionaries? They scrabble about for words.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a veteran begging in the street which made me very upset But then I remembered I wasn''t required to give the military quarters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called when a politician craps his pants in a Honda? Civic doody.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doesn''t matter if you support him or not, you got to give Trump credit for being the first elected official who is not breaking his campaign promises. We are all so used to politicians forgetting their campaign promises once elected. I am sure if Hillary had won, not even her supporters would expected her to deliver on all her promises. But not Trump. The man said he will F'' this country up, and true to his words, he is doing just that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A reporter wants to hear people''s opinion on the local meat shortage... The reporter saw a group of women talking to each other on a street corner, and decided to interview them. The group consisted of an American, a Chinese woman, an Ethiopian and an Israeli. "Excuse me, but could each of you give me your opinion on the local meat shortage?" asked the reporter. "What''s a shortage?" said the American. "What''s an opinion?" said the Chinese woman. "What''s meat?" said the Ethiopian woman. "What the fuck does ''excuse me'' mean?" said the Israeli.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill So Jack could lick Jill''s fanny. Jack got a shock and a mouthful of cock ''cause Jill''s a goddam tranny!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come there are no Olympics in Mexico? Because all of the Mexicans that can run jump and swim are already in America.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m deathly afraid of elevators. I take a lot of steps to avoid them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two antennas that got married? It was a nice ceremony....but the reception was amazing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is the only way to resist Trump''s agenda leave a mouse trap in front of your vagina.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In His Lust For Knowledge The Mathemagician con-summed himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here I was thinking that 2016 was over And now it came back for Moore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shout-out to my arms For always being by my side', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the chicken cross the road? Alternative facts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes life is like toilet paper.. You are either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A company testing on animals just got sued for testing a chapstick on horses that made their lips burn off. They called it neigh-balm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was getting very late and my niece was getting scared. "Uncle Davey, I am scared walking out here in the forest." "You?? What about ME!? I have to walk back all by myself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a blue whale and a sperm whale? Depends on if she lets me nut or not.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do dads keep their jokes? In their dadabase.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Trump Administration releases the contractor hired to build the infamous wall Bill DeWall, Inc.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What breed of dog is the most depressing...? A melancholy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend kept telling me to treat her like a princess. So I made her marry an old guy she''s never met to secure an alliance with the French.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As Jeff the street sweeper says "A clean place is not where one sweeps, but where one doesn''t litter" That''s why he traded in his broom for a shotgun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The anti-vax movement just got its first clothing sponsor Polio Ralph Lauren', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the pig when he got laryngitis...? He was dis-gruntled!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What drink does hitler hate the most? JUUUUICE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear who Ryan Reynold''s wife turned into when she found out he was having an affair? Blake Deadly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried making a chemistry joke today... ... But all the good element jokes Argon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ivanka is pregnant again, her new baby boy is due in October. She should call him Wally.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Zwitterion walks into a bar... A Zwitterion walks into a bar. The bartender asks him about his job. The Zwitterion says, "Eh, there''s some positives and negatives about it".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I couldn''t decide how to propose to the love of my life So I decided to ask her husband for advice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PAul McCartney goes to the doctor As he steps in the doctor grabs his coat and the nurse takes his temperature it comes out to 88 degrees, she grabs a new thermometer and still he''s 88 degrees, she goes to grab the doctor. Her and the doctor whisper worriedly as they look back at McCartney, the doctor then walks back to the man who''s now concerned, and says "sir, according to the thermometers you have severe hypothermia!" Paul just scoffs and replies"you had me worried for a second!" the doctor counfusedly asks why, and McCartney replies "I''m always below 90 degrees... I''m the acute one"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dave lost his left arm and left leg in an accident 3 years ago. Don''t worry, he''s all right now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gay man goes to the doctor and is diagnosed with AIDS The man is of course devastated, but asks the doctor if there is anything that can be done. "Yes," says the doctor. "Go home and eat a pound of Chili, one dozen of unpeeled carrots, three cups of bran, half a pound of jalapeos, half a pound of licorice, and wash it all down with a gallon of prune juice." "Will that cure me?" asks the patient hopefully. "No," replies the doctor. "But it will teach you what your asshole is for."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pilot gets ready for the flight "Alright everyone, we will be taking off in a minute, please remain seated.", he says. After taking off, the pilot forgot the microphone on. "Know what I want now?", says the co-pilot, "a cup of coffee and a woman to suck my dick". Noticing the problem with the mic, one of the attendants bolts off to warn them. While she ran, someone on the back seats yells "Don''t forget the coffee!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix a bell with poop? Duuuuuuung', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A truck load of Viagra was stolen yesterday Police don''t know who did it, but they''re on the lookout for hardened criminals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day I snuck a peek at my shrink''s notes and I saw she''d written "MESSIAH COMPLEX" in big capital letters. It caught me off guard. I''ve known I''m the messiah all of my life but I''ve never been called complex before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Trump played soccer in high school? He was a goalkeeper, set up a wall like you''ve never seen...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No one talked about it but the threat level was raised on January 20th, 2017 They raised it to orange.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has nine arms and sucks? Def Leppard', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a fight in the fish n chips shop the other day The fish got battered!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a dream that I was fighting Jason Bourne, Will Hunting and Tom Ripley Thanks to months of therapy, I''m finally battling my Damons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blind people of Reddit. I was watching a movie called 23 Blast (about a football player that went blind) and was curious if you can see when you''re dreaming. Oh. . . wait a minute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad Joke Kid laugh Edit : I''ve made a huge spelling mistake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to have a weird affliction that caused me to alter all my Reddit posts to add the names of my favourite Frasier and Cheers actors but I''m over it now. Edit: Grammer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s now apparently politically incorrect to say "Black paint" Now you have to say "Tyrone can you please go paint the fence?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at my wife''s friend''s house to pick up some glassware from the last time we all got together And my wife''s friend walks in and says "I want you to take off my shirt" So I take off her shirt, and she says "Now I want you to take off my pants" So I take her pants off, and she tells me to take off her bra and panties, so I take them off. Finally, she says "and if I ever catch you wearing my clothes again I''m going to tell your fucking wife"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t Mexicans good Firefighters? Because they don''t know the difference between "Jos" and "Hose B"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pathetic number of chickens? A poultry sum.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Arnold Schwarzenegger kill insects? Because he''s an ex-terminator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best thing about ISIS jokes? The execution', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear Apple is going into the wine business? Their vineyard will produce every varietal of wine... except ports.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what''s black and doesn''t work? Decaffeinated coffee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Virgin mary enters into heaven as soon as she gets in she notices a hot dog stand. She blushes and giggling says "the holy spirit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the news? What?" "Me neither. "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife said she hates Diablo 3 because it''s about demons I said, babe, it''s not about demons, its about gambling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump is supporting the minorities The minority of scientists that disbelieve global warming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I climaxed on a blind girl''s boobs yesterday She didn''t see it coming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bury it... ...it''s my dad''s ''dead joke''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a sailor in the navy farts smell like? Seaman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow who''s had an abortion? Decaffeinated', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a brand new cemetery in town Everybody is dying to get in', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Asian guy that always shows up before he needs to? Earl Lee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The biggest lie "I have read the terms and conditions"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jenny Craig I dropped 40 pounds on Jenny Craig. I think I broke her leg!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I head the singer of "Chandelier" is visiting my town I''m looking out for her, but I just can''t Sia!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the story about the invisible nymphomaniac? They say you never see her coming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Johnny Cash have the Cocaine Blues? He ran out of cocaine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The US should rejoin Great Britain Its not like we mind Taxation without representation anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Trump supporter tells a reporter, "Everyone knows we''re great at taking tests." Reporter: "What gives you that idea?" Trump supporter: "Everyone keeps calling us ''quiz-lings''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A stopped clock is correct two times a day, but how many times is it wrong?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s stay lighter later in the evening. Great now I can your moms ugly face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend just found out that he is both gay and dyslexic. He is still in Daniel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear why the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus shut down? Because the Trump administration is now the greatest show on earth!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me about a wonder food that he discovered that contains protein, fiber, and good fats That''s nuts, I told him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alternate Lyrics: I kissed a Trans and I liked it. The taste of her hairy lap stick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the center of a gay apple''s life? Dcor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the cookie so sad? Because his mother was a wafer so long.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like toilet paper... Life is like toilet paper, youre either on a roll or taking shit from some asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girlfriend told me that if I took her to get sushi, I didn''t have to use a condom after. She''s getting the raw end of that deal!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I read an article recently on Hitler''s speechwriter... Apparently he was a real grammar Nazi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you like your eggs in the morning? Boiled, poached, scrambled or fertilised?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aussie chat up line "...bite on this stick sheila..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s difficult being a dyslexic agnostic I''m never quite sure whether or not there''s a dog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The secret to making your computer a modern racist? Hold Alt+R', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had sex while camping? It''s fucking in tents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy moves way way out to the country... ...miles from anything. One day there''s a knock at the door, and he opens it to find a guy in full hayseed regalia, overalls, thermal shirt, the works. Hick: "Howdy, new neighbor! Would ya like to come to a party at my place tonight?" New guy: "Well, sure! I''m new to these parts, I sure would love to meet the locals." Hick: "I gotta warn ya, there''ll be some drinkin''." New guy: "That''s OK, I could use a drink." Hick: "There''ll be some salty language." New guy: "That won''t bother me." Hick: "...and some rough sex." New guy: "Hey, I''m in! How about if I bring a case of wine?" Hick: "Nah, a bottle should do: it''s just you and me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tortoises ... are nazi turtles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Hawaiian Jihadist say before he died? Aloha Ackbar!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard about the fruit that became a president? He got impeached.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My date was impressed when I said I really want to see her inner-beauty. She was less impressed when I asked to see inside her butt hole to spot it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tickets for the 2017 Superbowl A buddy of mine has two tickets for the 2017 Super Bowl on February 5th -- box seats plus airfare, accommodations, etc., but he didn''t realize when he bought them that this is going to be on the same day as his wedding - so he can''t go. If you''re interested and want to go instead of him, it''s at St Isaac Jogues Catholic Church, in Pickering, at 5 p.m. Her name''s Louise. She''s 5''4", about 125 lbs., good cook, makes a good salary. She will be the one in the white dress . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do batteries feel lonely? Because they are never included in anything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they call "roach-clips", "roach-clips"??? because potholder was already taken. I know it''s like a venn diagram of drug jokes and dad jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad tell me a joke[nsfw] "Hey dad tell me a joke" Dad:"Pussy" Son:"I don''t get it" Dad:"I know hahahaha"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a chickpea and a green pea? Trump wouldn''t pay $1000 to have a green pea on him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NSFW My girlfriend was arrested for riding her bike today. She was charged with peddling pussy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to a brain store... He asks the owner how much an accountant''s brain sells for. The owner tells him, "We sell that for $6 per pound of brain." He then asks how much a doctor''s brain sells for. The owner tells him, "We sell that for $11 per pound of brain." Finally, the man asks how much a politician''s brain sells for. The owner tells him, "We sell that for $1,000 per 4 oz of brain." The man is astonished and asks why so much. The owner tells him. "Do you know how many politicians we need to kill to find 1 oz of brain?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I posted a question about the brightest star in the night sky, but all I got were joke replies. Should''ve added the [Sirius] tag.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I walked in on my parents having sex last night... Possibly the most awkward 45 minutes of my life...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come Abraham Lincoln never went to jail? Because he was in a cent', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How was there no jackass in a giant penis costume at the women''s March? That would of been hilarious. You would never see feminists beat a dick so hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I told my wife I wanted to try anal sex She told me she''s been having sex with an asshole for years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a 20th century grammar nazi? Alt-Write', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Need your best Short Jokes One sentence max, I''ll start: A Dyslexic walks into a bra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a Jewish girl''s number? Lift up her sleeve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Artistic people of Reddit, what is being artistic really like? And can I get fries with that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Trump goes to the doctor... He says, "Listen doc, i get erections. I get the best erections, they''re yuuuuuge, call Sean Hannity, he''ll tell you. I''m having issues in the bedroom, presidential bedroom, and I''m falling flat, unlike my poll numbers. Can I get some Viagra?" The Dr replies, "No, but I can offer you some exercises and herbal remedies to help." Frustrated, Mr. Trump demands,"What kind of medicine do you practice here?!" "Alternative medicine." Edit: added some words and format on mobile', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Purple hate Red? Because she left him feeling Blue', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was Albert Einsteins DJ name? MC Squared', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What have women and clouds got in common? It only becomes a nice day after they piss off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends are a lot like trees... They fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man has been shot with a starting pistol... The police are pretty sure it''s race related.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An SEO Expert walks into a bar An SEO Expert walks into a bar, bars, beer garden, hangout, lounge, nightclub, mini bar, bar stool, tavern, pub, beer, wine, whiskey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shout out to all my people with split personality disorder You know who you are', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Blastoise''s favourite sex move? Hydrohump.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the fire at the hemp factory? It was high priority for the firefighters to get there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the 8th wonder of the world? Great Wall of Jina', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a new advice podcast for senile Tarantino fans It''s called "I Don''t Remember Asking You a GOD Damn Thing"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 79 year old pirate has his next birthday this morning.... he wakes up and says to his crew, "AYE-matey!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only 90''s-2000''s kids will understand I am a financially stable and responsible adult, and my life is completely in order. Excuse me while I go drown myself in alcohol.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did pyramid head always drag his weapon around? Because its illegal to carry!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Does Donald Trump Have in Common With London Dispersion Forces? They are both easily pushed to one side and can take a negative charge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like my women like my salad Undressed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everybody''s making a big deal about the Mexican president canceling his meeting with Trump... The wall isn''t even built yet and it''s already kept out at least one Mexican.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After nine years of being together, I finally got down on one knee. And begged her to take it up the arse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took my kid to a magic show... I took my kid to a magic show last night. The magician announced that for his final trick, he was going to make himself disappear. And so he began to count: "Uno! Dos!" And then he vanished without a tres!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Minecraft is not a video game Real video games have curves', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a couple gets into bed, the husband starts to rub and kiss his wife. She turns over and says, "I''m sorry, honey. I''ve got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The husband sadly turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife. "Do you have a dentist appointment, too?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So there''s a teacher.. One day the teacher decides to skip work & cut out his students eyes out for some reason. He puts the eyeballs in a bag & heads down the busy road until he got stopped by the police *Teacher - "What''s the problem, officer"* *Police - "We''re investigating a crime scene"* *Teacher - "Is there any questions that you''d like to ask me?"* *Police - "What''s your alibi from 8 am - 12 pm?"* *Teacher - "I was just chilling with my pupils."* *Police - "Oh, where can I find your pupils?"* *Teacher - "Opens bag"*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Republican libertarians play Xbox more than their friends? They hate it when everything has to be PC.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dating agency for well-to-do herpes sufferers? Elite Shingles', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Describe THE WALL in one word Yuuuge!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the hardest part of playing ultimate frisbee? Explaining to your parents that you''re gay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trump gets stumped Donald Trump is reading the news and the press calls him a word he does not know the meaning to. "Mike!", he barks. Mike Pence scurries into the office nervously. "Yes Mr. President?" "What does this word mean?", Trump demands. "Huh, I don''t know Mr. President." "What do you mean you don''t know!?" "Well, I''ve only heard it being used to describe women", Pence admits. "What?! How dare they?!" "I need to know it''s meaning" Trump picks up the phone and makes a call. "Yes? Vladimir?... Sorry, Mr. Putin?" "Yes, I know it''s really late in Russia and I apologize, but I''m calling to ask permission to Google the word ''submissive''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a singing laptop? A Dell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Trump supporter decides to protest with his gun outside of a mosque. What should the police do? Nothing. He''ll eventually shoot himself in the foot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Oakland Raiders are moving to Las Vegas. Thus making "went to a Raiders game" yet another thing people won''t talk about when they get home from Vegas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took a vacation to a city in France. It was Nice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the middle east its hard to tell who''s crazy, And Hussein.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Australians don''t have sex They mate', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do pirates never quit their jobs? Because once they lose a hand they get hooked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a thought the other day Losing 15 pounds sounds a lot better in America than in England.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a robot do after sex? Nuts and bolts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don''t know y.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad Joke Dad: (Grabs his chest) Call me an ambulance Son: You are........ an ambulance Dad: Proud of you son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of music do astronauts love? Neptunes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A steak pun is A rare medium well done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three fourth grade boys participate in a dick measuring contest... The boys are white, black and Korean. They all three pull out their whangs and measure up. The winner ends up being the black dude by a *long* shot. When the black boy goes home, he goes up to his mom and says "Mooom! Today I got into a contest with the boys where we measured our dicks and I won! Is it because I''m black?? She said "No Tyrone its because you''re 18".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sugar is the only word in English language in which "Su" is pronounced as "Shu". I am pretty sure about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which genre of music appeals to most cheeses? R''n''Brie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I really like Windows as an OS. You could say I have a Micro_soft_ spot for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mayweather fight tickets. I didn''t know where to post this, but I heard this was a popular subreddit so here I go. My friend purchased two tickets to the upcoming Mayweather fight, but he''s now realised that the date of the fight is the same of that of his wedding day. Therefore, he has kindly requested that I give the opportunity for someone on here to take his place. Comment down below for the opportunity to win. Details: Name is Lucy, Pretty, about 5 8" in height...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to Kennedy Space Center to become an astronaut, but the scientists were not very supportive. They just said things like, "You''re not qualified" and "Why are you naked?" and "I CAN''T CATCH HIM HE''S COVERED IN BABY OIL."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the Surgeon General, the Postmaster General, and the General of the Army have in common? I''m running all of their alt twitter accounts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an elephant with Darth Vader? An elevader.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a place with a 98% recycling rate! r/Jokes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a seamstress reply to someone asking her how her day was? So,so.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shout-out to my grandma Because that''s the only way she can hear me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a guy, it''s not that I have anything against psychiatric wards... I''m just afraid of commitment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We have a strange custom in our office. We have a strange custom in our office. The food has names there. Yesterday for example I got me a sandwich out of the fridge and its name was "Kevin"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife dragged her husband to their marriage counselor appointment with his fishing net. "Do you see what I have to put up with," the wife says. "Yes," said the counselor. "He''s obviously in seine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What climate scientist does Disney follow on twitter? The rogue one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 3 legged dog walks into an Old West Saloon... As he enters a hush falls over the establishment. The piano stops playing, poker games halt as all eyes are on this dog as he walks up to the bar. The 3 legged dog slowly takes out his gun and rests it on the bar top. The barkeep says "What can I do for ya" to which the 3 legged dog sternly replies "I''m looking for the man who shot my Paw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Brazilian...." The blonde replies, "Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('History class During history class at a German school, a young boy raises his hand and asks: "Teacher, is it true that cities in Russia have the longest streets in the world?" Clearly perplexed, the teacher asks the boy, "What led you to believe such an assumption?" "Well, teacher," the boy answer, "my grandpa told me that he and his unit were crawling through one street in Stalingrad for three months and never reached the end of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best part of being a lesbian in 1912? Both got seats on the titanic''s lifeboats.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you call a black guy with a lower body growth disorder? Knee-grow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What camp were jewish pets sent to? Mousevitz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Physicist''s favorite author? Joules Verne', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an emo on a hiking trip? Cliffhanger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Germans say when you send them a fire meme? Danke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two numbers are part of a fraction. The one on top says, "I''m going to run for president!" The one on bottom says, "The hell you are!" Ignoring the bottom number, the top one goes and puts his name in. This angers the bottom number, and he undoes the nomination. He then comes back to the numerator and tells him what he did. "Why''d you do that!?" He replied, angrily. "It''s my job," replied the denominator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 Guys find a Genie in an Indoor swimming pool. Genie: "Okay, all of you will get on the springboard, say what they wish to be in the pool it will be in there." Max: "I want money!" And so he jumps in a pool of money. Peter: "I want Chocolate" and so he jumps into a pool of chocolate. Carl slips off the springboard and screams "SHIT!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To all those that received a book from me for a Christmas present They''re due back at the library today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the detective say when it started to rain I better run don''t want my trench coat to become a drench coat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call hamburger in India ? God', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the opposite of Tim Walken? Tim Daly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you give a man a fish& &Hell eat for a day; teach the man to fish he eats for a lifetime. &he may choke on the bones and die. Think of the liability, and the guilt!! &you dont know if hes allergic. Again, you need to think of the liabilities!! &Hell keep eating your fish; stop giving the man fish, let him fetch his own. &thats worth nothing to him; he cant figure how to fish then he surely cant cook for shit &Hell eat for a day; if you teach the man to fish hell buy a boat and start fishing. Hell start his own fishing company; soon hell have a whole fleet and a booming business. One day you will be buying your own fish from him. &but he should be eating more vegetables instead &God know what kind of fetishes he has&', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I rang the RSPCA hotline... I rang the RSPCA hotline to tell them I''d just found six Badgers in a suitcase by the side of the road "Are they moving?" asked the operator "Not sure" I replied "But that would explain the suitcase"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a priest and a sister? Nun', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was listening to my German Student perform Goldfish by Debussy... Unfortunately, his playing was rather Vichy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Dracula fail math? He forgot how to Count.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why did Saturn get a ring? told god, "if you like it, then you better put a ring on it"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you a good cook? colleage - Oh you cook!! How good of a cook are you? me - the hungrier you are, the better i am.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not sure if Trump will be re-elected I don''t have 2020 vision.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Barak say to Joe on the last day of his presidency? "Bi-den. Keep in touch"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My professor just said that the particle of light is like a bullet... The black objects absorb more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bionic pig? Robocop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the anomaly so poor? Because it didn''t make any cents!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff... Baa dum tssssss', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The European Union is disgusting! Absolutely disgusting! EU!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cow jumping over a barbed wire fence? Utter destruction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and red all over? A newspaper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, this guy walks into a bar. And says, "ouch".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the opposite of pro is con, isn''t the opposite of progress, congress?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy with no arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a wedding the other day. Two antennas were getting married. It wasn''t much of a wedding ceremony, but it was one heck of a reception!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s this dyslexic guy... he walked into a bra...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joel: "How''s the progress on new house that you are building Pete?" Peter: "Things are really slow at the moment." Joel: "Yeah, I guess all this rain would be putting a dampener on things..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A white horse walked into a bar. The barman saw him and said, "We have a whiskey named after you!" The horse looked puzzled and said, "What, Eric?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a dyslexic insomniac agnostic. He laid awake all night wondering if there really was a Dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the sea? A start.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? A bad golfer goes whack, dang. A bad skydiver goes dang, whack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with wind, but it really doesn''t bother me too much because they never smell and are always silent." "As a matter of fact, I''ve farted at least 20 times since I''ve been here in your office." The doctor says, "I see, take these pills and come back to see me next week." The next week the lady goes back to his office. "Doctor," she says, "I don''t know what you gave me, but now my farts, although still silent, stink terribly!" The doctor says, "Good, Now that we''ve cleared up your sinuses, let''s work on your hearing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: Well I hope you enjoy changing diapers, Mrs Jones? Mrs Jones: Why, Am I pregnant? Doctor: No, you have bowel cancer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blond with half a brain? Gifted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q What has two legs, and bleeds? A Half a dog!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Essex girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I''ll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress," she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "No" she replies. "This time it''s mayonnaise."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk man walked up to an elevator. He pressed the up button and opened the doors before the elevator could come down to him. He fell all the way down, and said, "Darn it, I said up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if you introduce a friend to your wife and sister and he only has to shake one hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A patient wakes up after having surgery to remove a gangrenous leg. Doctor: "I have good news and bad news." Patient: "What''s the bad news?" Doctor: "The bad news is that we amputated the wrong leg." Patient: "That''s terrible! What''s the good news?" Doctor: "We think the other leg is going to make it alright."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, that to get her out of a phone booth we had to grease her thighs and throw a Twinkie into the street.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were cleaning out their attic when the man found a shoe repair stub in the pocket of an old jacket. "Hey - check this out," he said to his wife, "this stub is 20 years old. I wonder if the shop still has the shoes." So the next day the man went to the shoe shop and asked the owner if he still had the shoes. The owner disappeared into the back of the shop for about five minutes. When he returned, he replied happily, "Yup, believe it or not, we''ve still got the shoes. They''ll be ready next Thursday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bishop, a priest, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says, "What is this, a joke?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pope, a hippie, and George Bush were all on a plane that was crashing. The pilots had already jumped to safety and there were only two parachutes left. Without a moment''s hesitation, Bush grabbed a pack, yelled "I''m the most powerful man in the universe! I have to survive!", and jumped from the plane. The Pope, being the generous man that he is, said to the hippie, "You go ahead and take the last parachute. I''m an old man and I have lived a very full life." The hippie thanked the Pope but said, "Don''t worry - we''ll both be fine. The most powerful man in the universe just jumped off the plane with my backpack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Economic times were very bad, so the plant owner had a difficult time finding people to work in his new factory. In an act of desperation, he hired a tribe of cannibals. At their orientation he made it very clear that he would not tolerate any acts of cannibalism in the plant. Three months went by without incident, when all of a sudden a secretary disappeared without a trace. The manager rounded up all of the cannibals. "If I find out that one of you ate the secretary," he said, "I''m going to fire all of you!" and with that, stormed out of the room. After he left the room, one of the cannibals stood up and said, "This is a disgrace! For months we''ve been eating managers and no one has even noticed! Which one of you fools ate a secretary?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jim is in a hot-air balloon, completely lost. He sees a man in a field below and flies down to him. "Excuse me sir, but can you tell me where I am?" The man in the field replied "You''re in a balloon." Jim said "You''re an engineer, aren''t you?" "Why yes, I am. How did you know?" "Because you gave me a perfectly logical, yet completely useless answer." Jim continued flying, when he saw another man in a field. "Excuse me, sir, but can you tell me where I am?" he asked. "Well, you''re about two miles north of Ogdenville. If you go to the west side of town you''ll find an airstrip that you can safely land on." Jim replied "Thank you very much, sir. That was extremely helpful. Say, I''ll bet you''re a manager, aren''t you?" "Why yes, I am, how did you know?" "Because your pants are on backward".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Engineering Major says "How does it work?" A Science Major says "Why does it work?" An Accounting Major says "How much will it cost?" A Liberal Arts Major says "Do you want fries with that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the bulb has got to WANT to change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sitting next to the Pope on a cross-country flight. The Pope was doing a crossword puzzle. He turned to the man and asked "Do you know a four-letter word for ''woman'' that ends in U-N-T?" The man thought for a minute and said "Aunt." "Oh yes, of course," the Pope replied. "Do you have an eraser?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette was walking down the middle of the street, saying "34...34...34" over and over again. A blonde stopped her and asked why she was doing that. "Oh, it''s great fun," replied the brunette. "You should try it". So the blonde walked down the street repeating "34...34...34..." when all of a sudden a car sped by and ran her over. The brunette then started walking down the road again, saying "35...35...35..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a blonde woman has been dating? By the belt buckle imprint on her forehead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde say when she loses her virginity? "So are you guys all on the same team?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many lawyers does it take to shingle the roof of a house? It depends on how thin you slice ''em.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the Polish wolf? He chewed off three legs and was still caught in the trap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A polar bear walked into a bar and said "Can I please have a gin and............................................tonic?" The bartender replied "Sure, but why the large pause?" "I don''t know, I''ve always had them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bartender here?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know diarhea is part of your inheritence? Ya, it flows in our genes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s this guy he goes to see the doctor and says, "Doctor, Doctor, I have a terrible problem. I have a strawberry stuck up my bottom." The doctor says, "It''s ok, I''ll give you some cream to put on it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks an older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions. The old priest suggests, "Cross you arms over your chest, and rub your chin with one hand." The new priest tries this. The old priest suggests, "Try saying things like, ''I see,'' ''yes,'' ''go on,'' ''I understand,'' and ''how did you feel about that?''" The new priest says those things, trying them out. The old priest says, "Now, don''t you think that''s a little better than slapping your knee and saying ''No shit! What happened next?''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before you judge someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you judge them, you''re a mile away and you have their shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When cryptography is outlawed, bayl bhgynjf jvyy unir cevinpl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A veterinarian surgeon had a bad day, but when he got home from tending to all the sick animals, his wife was waiting with a long cool drink and a romantic candle-lit dinner. After dinner, they had a few more drinks and went happily to bed. At about 2:00 in the morning, the phone rang. "Is this the vet?" asked an elderly lady. "Yes, it is," replied the vet, "Is this an emergency?" "Well, sort of," said the elderly lady, "There''s a whole bunch of cats on the roof outside making a terrible noise mating, and I can''t get to sleep. What can I do about it?" There was a sharp intake of breath from the vet, who then patiently replied, "Open the window and tell them they''re wanted on the phone." "Really?" said the elderly lady, "Will that stop them?" "Well, it should," said the vet, "It stopped ME!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Six-year-old Jerry came downstairs bellowing lustily. "What''s the matter?" asked his mother. "Papa was hanging pictures, and he just hit his thumb with a hammer," said Jerry. "That''s not so serious," soothed his mother. "A big man like you shouldn''t cry at a trifle like that. Why didn''t you just laugh?" "I did," sobbed Jerry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a donkey with one leg? A wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye? A winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye making love? A bonky winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind? A stinky bonky winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind, wearing blue suede shoes? A honky tonky stinky bonky winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind, wearing blue suede shoes and playing piano? A plinky plonky honky tonky stinky bonky winky wonky donkey What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind, wearing blue suede shoes, playing piano and driving a truck? Bloody talented!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of cannibals. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to himself, "Oh God, I''m screwed." The sky darkens and a voice booms out, "No, you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone at your feet and bash in the head of the chief standing in front of you." So with the stone he bashes the life out of the chief. Standing above the lifeless body, breathing heavily looking at 100 angry natives... The voice booms out again, "Okay... NOW you''re screwed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, two monks were in the vaults of the monastery going through the old scrolls. "You see, there are the originals," said the first monk. "All the new scrolls were copied from these." "Can I see one?" "Sure. This is one outlines the rules for monkdom . . " All of a sudden, the monk''s face turns white and he falls to his knees. "What? What does it say?" "Celebrate. IT SAYS CELEBRATE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scottish tourist attended his first baseball game in the US and after a base hit he hears the fans roaring "Run....Run!" The next batter connects heavily with the ball and the Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd in his thick accent: "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-run will ya!" A third batter hits a slam and again the Scotsman, obviously pleased with his knowledge of the game, screams "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run will ya!" The next batter steadfastly holds his swing four times and as the ump calls a walk the Scotsman stands up and yells "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run!" All the surrounding fans giggle quietly and he sits down confused. A friendly fan, sensing his embarrassment, whispers to the Scotsman, "He doesn''t have to run, he''s got four balls." After this explanation the Scotsman stands up in disbelief and screams, "Walk with pr-r-ride man! Walk with pr-r-ride!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two little boys go into the grocery store. One is nine, one is four. The nine-year-old grabs a box of tampons from the shelf and carries it to the register for check-out. The cashier asks "Oh, these must be for your mom, huh?" The nine-year-old replies, "Nope, not for my mom." Without thinking, the cashier responded, "Well, they must be for your sister then?" The nine-year-old responded, "Nope, not for my sister either." The cashier had now become curious. "Oh. Not for your mom and not for your sister -- then who are they for?" The nine-year old says "They''re for my four-year-old little brother." The cashier is surprised: "Your four year-old-brother?" The nine-year-old explains: "Well yeah, they say on TV if you wear one of these, you can swim or ride a bike -- and my little brother can''t do either of those things."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young, beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling like expensive perfume. She turns to an old woman and says arrogantly, "Giorgio Beverly Hills, $100 an ounce!" Another young, beautiful woman gets onto the elevator and also smells of very expensive perfume. She arrogantly turns to the old woman and says, "Chanel No. 5, $150 dollars an ounce!" About three floors later, the old woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, she looks both of the women in the eyes, farts, and says, "Broccoli, 49 cents a pound!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee. On his first day, he dialed the kitchen and shouted into the phone: "Get me an fucking cup of coffee, quickly!" The voice from the other side responded, "You fool, you''ve dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you''re talking to?" "No," replied the trainee. "It''s the Managing Director of the company, idiot!" The trainee shouted back, "And do you know who YOU are fucking talking to, you idiot?" "No!" replied the Managing Director indignantly. "Thanks for that!" replied the trainee and put down the phone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys walked into a bar... you would have thought the second one would have ducked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows were standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don''t believe you," said Dolly. "It''s true, straight up, no bull!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says "Dam".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The darkest hours come just before the dawn. So if you''re going to steal your neighbour''s milk and newspaper, that''s the time to do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, no-one is listening until you fart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first you don''t succeed ... avoid skydiving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day... Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blind deer? No idea (no eye deer.) What do you call a blind deer with no legs? Still no idea! (not moving [still] no eye deer)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A duck walked into a store one day and asked the clerk, "Do you have any grapes?" The clerk said, "No." So the duck walked out and came back the next day and said, "You got any grapes?" and the clerk said, "No." So the duck walked out and came in next time and said, "You got any grapes?" and the clerk said, "No, and if you come in again and ask if we have any grapes, I''ll staple your feet to the floor." So the duck walked out and came in again and said, "You got any staples?" the clerk said, "No..." so the duck said, "You got any grapes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma''s so ugly, she''s not bald, it''s her hair running away from her face!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The gap between your teeth is so big, I don''t know whether to smile back or kick a field goal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are so stupid, you took a ruler with you to bed to see how long you slept!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so big, she had to call Sherwin-Williams to paint her toenails!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Anita. Anita who? Anita really warm place to sleep tonight, it''s cold out here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat, when you sit around the house, you really sit around the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Your dog rides in your truck more than your wife. 2. You wear specific hats to farm sales, livestock auctions, customer appreciation suppers, and vacations. 3. You have ever had to wash off in the backyard with a garden hose before your wife would let you in the house. 4. You''ve never thrown away a 5-gallon bucket. 5. You can remember the fertilizer rate, seed population, herbicide rate and yields on a farm you rented 10 years ago, but cannot recall your wife''s birthday. 6. You have used a velvet leaf plant as toilet paper. 7. You have driven off the road while examining your neighbors crops. 8. You have borrowed gravel from the county road to fill potholes in your driveway. 9. You have buried a dog and cried like a baby. 10. You''ve used the same knife to make bull calves steers and peel apples.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 32 rednecks in a room? A full set of teeth!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there were two men walking down a dirt path. One of them had a big potato sack over his shoulder. The other decided to ask what was in the sack. When he asked, the man said, "I got me some chickens for dinner tonight. Mmm Mmm Mmm... Chicken sure sounds good tonight." The other one wanted to know how many chickens were in the sack. "Well, I''ll tell you," replied the man, "If you can guess how many chickens I''ve got in this here sack I''ll give them both to you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know that the toothbrush was invented by a redneck? If it was invented by anyone else they would have called it a "teethbrush".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office and sees The President whooping and hollering. "What''s the matter, Mr. President?" the Vice President inquired. "Nothing at all, boss. I just done finished a jigsaw puzzle in record time!" the President beamed. "How long did it take you?" "Well, the box said ''3 to 5 Years'' but I did it in a month!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A squad of American soldiers was patrolling the Iraqi border, when they came across a badly mangled dead body. As they got closer, they found it was an Iraqi soldier. A short distance up the road, they found a badly mangled American soldier in a ditch on the other side of the road, struggling to breathe. They ran to him, cradled his bruised head and asked him what had happened. "Well," he whispered, "I was walking down this road, armed to the teeth when I came across this heavily armed Iraqi border guard. I looked him right in the eye and shouted, ''Saddam Hussein is a moronic, deceitful, lying piece of trash!''" "He looked me right in the eye and shouted back, ''George W. Bush is a moronic, deceitful, lying piece of trash too!''" "We were standing there shaking hands when the truck hit us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton died and went to Heaven. St. Peter was giving her a tour of Heaven when she noticed that there were dozens of clocks on the wall. Each clock displayed a different time of day. When she asked St. Peter about the clocks, he replied, "We have a clock for each person on earth and every time they tell a lie the hands move. The clock ticks off one second each time a lie is told." Special attention was given to two clocks. The clock belonging to Mother Teresa has never moved, indicating that she never told a lie. The clock for Abraham Lincoln has only moved twice. He only told two lies in his life. Hillary asked "Where is Bill''s clock?" St. Peter replied,"Jesus has it in his office... he''s using it as a ceiling fan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?" The little boy nodded in the affirmative. "Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together as a team?" The little boy nodded yes. "So," the coach continued, "when a strike is called, or you''re out at first, you don''t argue or curse or attack the umpire. Do you understand all that?" Again the little boy nodded. "Good," said the coach, "now go over there and explain it to your mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a class on abnormal psychology, the instructor was about to introduce the subject of manic depression. The instructor asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth, screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?" A young man in the rear raised his hand and suggested earnestly, "A basketball coach?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('G. W. Bush was very depressed that people were saying he is stupid. So he calls his good friend Queen Elizabeth, who says, "Now George, what you need to do is to surround yourself with smart people. Let me show you." She conference calls Tony Blair in and asks, "Tony, your parents had a baby. It isn''t your sister and it isn''t your brother. Who is it?" Tony Blair replies, "It''s me!" and hangs up. G.W. Bush then calls Dick Cheney and says, "Dick, your parents had a baby. It isn''t your sister and it isn''t your brother. Who is it?" And Cheney says, "Wow, that''s a tough one. Let me get back to you." So Cheney calls Colin Powell and says, "Colin, your parents had a baby. It isn''t your sister and it isn''t your brother. Who is it?" And Colin Powell says, "It''s me!" So Cheney calls Bush and says, "It''s Colin Powell." And Bush says, "No, you idiot! It''s Tony Blair!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did ya hear I got married? "Oh, that''s good." "No, that''s bad! She''s ugly!" "Oh, that''s bad." "No, that''s good! She''s rich." "Oh, that''s good!" "No, that''s bad! She won''t give me a cent." "Oh, that''s bad." "No, that''s good! She bought me servants and a big house" "Oh, that''s good." "No, that''s bad! The house burnt down." "Oh, that''s bad." "No, that''s good! She was in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions.... Officer: What''s 2+2? Blonde: Ummmmm... 4! Officer: What''s the square root of 100? Blonde: Ummmm... 10! Officer: Good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln? Blonde: Ummmm... I dunno. Officer: Well, you can go home and think about it. Come back tomorrow. The blonde goes home and calls up one of her friends, who asks her if she got the job. The blonde says, excitedly, "Not only did I get the job, I''m already working on a murder case!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A programmer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I''ll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The programmer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I''ll stay with you and do anything you want." Again the programmer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I''ve told you I''m a beautiful princess that I''ll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won''t you kiss me?" The programmer said, "Look, I''m a programmer. I don''t have time for a girlfriend -- but a talking frog, now that''s cool."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A southern minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great expression he said, ''''If I had all the beer in the world, I''d take it and pour it into the river.'''' With even greater emphasis he said, ''''And if I had all the wine in the world, I''d take it and pour it into the river.'''' And then finally, he said, ''''And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I''d take it and pour it into the river.'''' Sermon complete, he then sat down. The song leader stood very cautiously and announced, "And today we will let someone in the crowd pick our closing song." A Alabama man raised his hand and said, "Fer are closin song, we gonna sing dat one Hymn #365: ''Shall We Gather at the River.''''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday a pastor asked his congregation to consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns. After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed that someone had contributed a $1,000 bill. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation, and said he''d like to personally thank the person who had placed the money in the plate. A very quiet, elderly, saintly widow shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front. Slowly she made her way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much and asked her to pick out three hymns. Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the three handsomest men in the building and said, "I''ll take him and him and him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw a guy eating grass He told the driver to stop. He got out and asked him, "Why are you eating grass". The man replied, "I''m so poor, I can''t afford a thing to eat." So the laywer said, "Poor guy, come back to my house." The guys then said, "But I have a wife and three kids." The layers told him to bring them along. When they were all in the car, the poor man said, "Thanks for taking us back to your house, it is so kind of you." The laywer said, "You''re going to love it there, the grass is a foot tall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineer died and ended up in Hell. He was not pleased with the level of comfort in Hell, and began to redesign and build improvements. After a while, they had toilets that flush, air conditioning, and escalators. Everyone grew very fond of him. One day God called to Satan to mock him, "So, how''s it going down there in Hell?" Satan replied, "Hey, things are great. We''ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there''s no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." God was surprised, "What? You''ve got an engineer? That''s a mistake. He should never have gone down there in the first place. Send him back up here." "No way," replied Satan. "I like having an engineer, and I''m keeping him." God threatened, "Send him back up here now or I''ll sue!" Satan laughed and answered, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? interrupting cow interrupting co--- MOO', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly she went into a haunted house and came out with a job application.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she got hit by a parked car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly, just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her dad said, "Yeah! Let''s go bury it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly, two guys broke into her apt., she yelled "rape", they yelled "NO!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly, I took her to the zoo, and the zookeeper said "I didn''t know an animal had escaped."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde got a dent in her car and took it in to the mechanic. The mechanic, noticing that the woman was a blonde, decided to have some fun. So he told her all she had to do was take it home and blow in the tailpipe until the dent popped itself out. After 15 minutes of this, the blonde''s blonde friend came over and asked what she was doing. "I''m trying to pop out this dent, but it''s not really working." "Duh. You have to roll up the windows first!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a nightly stroll a blonde came across an office building. A sign said, "Press bell for Watchman." She presses it and hears an old man coming down the stairs. He turns on the light, unlocks the gate, and shuts off the security system. When he asked what the blonde wanted, she replied, "Why can''t you press that button for yourself?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde inventions: Waterproof towel Unbreakable egg Submarine screen door Solar powered flash light Helicopter ejection seat Inflatable dart board Pedal powered wheel chairs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the skeleton of a blonde you find in a closet? 1950''s Hide-n-seek champion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 blondes are walking in the park and the 1st blonde says, "LOOK! Dead bird!" The 2nd blonde looks up into the sky and yells "Where?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a blonde doing if her hands are covered tightly over her ears and her mouth is completely shut? She''s trying to hold onto a thought.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you never ask a blonde to make ice cubes for you? She''ll never remember the recipe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde was in a store, and saw a sign advertising a huge TV sale. She goes up to the salesman, and points to a shelf and says, "I want to buy that TV." The man says "No." The blonde, assuming its because he hates blondes, goes home and dyes her hair brown. She goes back to the store and asks again, only to again be told again, "No." She goes home dies her hair black, and returns yet again. She asks for the TV, and is told "No, go home you blonde!" So she finally snaps and cries, "I''ve died my hair twice!How the hell do you know I''m blonde?" The salesman replies, "That''s a microwave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she''s pregnant. What will be her response? "Is it mine?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the first blonde president move out of the oval office? She couldn''t find a corner to put her stuff in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so ugly when she walks through the woods during hunting season she wears a sign saying "DONT SHOOT! FROM THE FRONT I LOOK ALMOST HUMAN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde steal a parked police car? She saw "911" and thought it was a Porsche. (Porsche 911)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went into a local salon for a haircut. She was wearing a pair of headphones and she refused to take them off. The hairdresser tried to slip them off to cut her hair but the blonde just screamed "NO, DONT DO IT!" In a few minutes the blonde fell asleep from all the thinking she had to do to pick out a hairstyle. The hairdresser takes off the headphones and in a few minutes the blonde dies. The hairdresser, shocked, then hears the headphones. It was repeating the words "Inhale... exhale.... inhale..... exhale...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell a blondes been using your computer? There''s whiteout on the screen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a drug store and asks the pharmacist if he can give him something for the hiccups. The pharmacist promptly reaches down, pulls out a knife, and lunges at the man. The man backs away and yells "WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?" "Well, you don''t have the hiccups anymore do you?" replies the pharmacist. The man says, "No I don''t, you jerk; but my wife out in the car still does!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adam was in the Garden of Eden and was very very lonely. So God decides to build him a friend and lover. He decides to call it a "Woman". So he sets out to work but realizes he''ll need to borrow a few parts from Adam, so he goes to Adam and explains the situation. God says "I''ll build the perfect companion, she''ll cook, clean, take care of your every wish and need and will never nag or complain or be angry at you for no reason. It''ll only cost you an arm and a leg." Adam says "But I need my arm and leg... what can I get for just a rib?" And the rest is history...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly when you go outside your arrested for indecent exposure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so poor I saw her kicking a cardboard box down the street and when I asked her what she was doing she said "Moving!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many little brothers does it take to change a light bulb? Three- one to hold onto the bulb and two to turn the ladder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two- One to screw in the idea, and one to give it a suprising twist at the end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many boy scouts does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three- Each to do one good turn daily.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so fat, she didn''t have a birth certificate, she had a blueprint!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, she sells shade, and that gives her enough to feed a family!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so poor, I blew my nose, and she said, "Lord thank us, we have food!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Halloween, a boy dressed up as a cowboy. He went to a house, and an elderly lady opened the door. She said, "What might you be?" and the kid in front of the boy said, "I''m an Indian! All day, I hunt buffalo and make teepees and wigwams!" and the lady gave him some candy. Then the boy was up in line. The elderly lady said, "What might you be?" and he replied, "I''m a cowboy! All day, I round up cattle and take them to corrals!" The lady gave him some candy. So he went to the next house, and a scorching hot teenage girl opened the door. She said, "What might you be?" and the girl in front of the boy said, "I''m a lesbian. All day I think of women, all afternoon I think of women, and all night I think of women." The teenage girl gave her some candy, and next the boy was up. The teenage girl said, "What might you be?" The boy looked her up and down, and said, "Well, I thought I was a cowboy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, on her first date, a blond went to an amusement park with her boyfriend. After they went on the roundabout, the boy said, "What do you want to do next?" The girl said, "I want to be weighed." So he weighed the blond on a guess the weight game. Then they went on the roller coaster, and afterwards the boy said, "What do you want to do next?" The girl said, "I want to be weighed." So he weighed the blond again, and she weighed the same, so he took her home. When she got home, she flumped on the couch and her mother said, "How was the date?" The blond said, "Weewy Weewy Wousy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is a computer like an air conditioner? When you open Windows it won''t work!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he''s doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he''s going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I''ve heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person''s hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It''s guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!" The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I''m talking to that little jerk on your knee!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('20. The hole closed on him before he could penetrate it. 19. He came at his blind side and got him from behind. 18. He''s off to the sidelines for a quick blow. 17. It''s a game of inches. 16. That hole was so big, you could drive a truck through it. 15. When you get down in this area, you just gotta start pounding. 14. He''s gonna feel that one tomorrow. 13. He found his tight end. 12. End around. 11. He had to stretch to get it in. 10. He gets penetration in the backfield. 9. He blows them off (at the line). 8. He bangs it in. 7. He could go all the way. 6. He gets it off just in time. 5. He goes deep. 4. He found a hole and slid through it. 3. He pounds it in. 2. He beats them off (the line) 1. He''s got great hands.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why is it so hard to replace Vanna White? A: They can''t find another blonde who knows the whole alphabet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the definition of bravery? A man with diarrhea chancing a fart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does santa greet the three blonde sisters? Ho. Ho. Ho.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You were so ugly as a baby you were the poster child on the birth control posters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re on a plane going to California and you''re stuck in an aisle seat how do you trick a blonde into giving you her window seat? Tell her only the aisle seats are going to California.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are New Yorkers always depressed? Because the light at the end of the tunnel is New Jersey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and a drunk is sitting there mumbling something quietly. Curious the man takes the seat next to him. The drunk is mumbling, "Looks like plastic, feels like rubber." While looking at something in his hand. The man asks the drunk if he may see what he means. The man feels the object and says, "It does look like plastic and feels like rubber. Where did you get it?" The drunk replies, "From my nose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so dumb she took a spoon to the Superbowl!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so stupid, it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The day before Christmas break, a few kindergarten students decided to give their teacher a gift. The first gift was from a little girl whos daddy was a florist. The teacher takes the present unwraps it and discovers it''s flowers. She thanks the girl and takes the next present. Its from a little boy whose daddy own a candy store. She unwraps the present and sure enough there''s a box of chocolates. She thanks the boy and takes the last gift. The last gift is from a boy whose daddy owns a liquor store. The gift is dripping with a weird liquid. Shocked that the boy''s father would give him alcohol to give to a teacher, decides to say nothing and guess what it is. "Is it champagne?" The boy replies "No." "Is it wine?" The boy again replies "Nope." The teacher gives up and asks what it is. The excited boy yells, "ITS A PUPPY!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little blind rabbit and a little blind snake met each other in the woods one day and, as neither of them could see what species they were so they decided to feel each other and then describe each other so that the rabbit would know what kind of animal he was and the snake would also know what species he was. The snake ran his tongue over the rabbit. "Why, you are fluffy and soft and have a wet nose," the snake said; "you must be a rabbit." The rabbit then ran his paws over the length of the snake and said, "Well, you are cold, slimy, scaly and hard .... you must be a lawyer!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman are having an intimate dinner in a restaurant when their waitress, standing a few tables away, watches as the man quietly slides all the way down his chair and out of sight. The woman across from him seems to not notice.The waitress comes over and says, "Excuse me, Ma''am, but I think your husband just slid under the table." The woman says, "No he didn''t, he just walked in the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so old and fat when God said let there be light, he asked your momma to move the hell out of the way because she was blocking the sun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde came home from work early and when she walked into her house, she saw her husband in bed with another woman. She pulls her gun out of her purse and points it to her head. Her husband screams, "NO DON''T DO IT! I''m sorry!" To which the blonde replies "SHUT UP! You''re next!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette and a redhead all work together in an office building. Their female boss always leaves work early. So one day the brunette says, "Lets skip out early today. No one will notice." So they all leave work early. The brunette goes to a movie, and the redhead goes to a few bars. The blonde though wanted to go home and have sex with her husband. She arrives home and goes into her bedroom where her husband and her boss are having sex. The blonde quietly slips out the door and runs from her house. The next day when the brunette suggested they skip work again the blonde replied, "No way! I almost got caught yesterday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Someone too short to ring the doorbell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college student sent the following letter to her parents: Hi Parent$! Today i$ $eptember 15. I''m doing $uperb in $chool (or, $hould I $ay, college). The teacher$ are great, my roommate$ are great, and I''m having a $uper time! All I could u$e right now is a little ca$h. To which the parents responded: Hi daughter! NOthing happening on this end. Something''s wrong, because you kNOw, we got this letter in NOvember. I am NOt worrying about anything down here, kNOck on wood huh? Your loving parents, NOrden and Morden Finkelstein.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two buzzards were eating a dead clown. One said to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so dumb, she had you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politics comes from the root "poli-", which means many, and "-tics", which means, blood-sucking creatures.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they have braille on drive-thru ATMs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can women put mascara on with their mouth closed?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok, 3 canadians were walking along the beach, one from the Yukon, one from Quebec, and one from Newfoundland. Now, it happened that they found a magic lamp. After rubbing it, the genie promised each of them one wish. The Yukon said, "I wish for fish teeming in our waters for a million years." The genie snapped his fingers and said, "Done." The Yukon man went off to go fish. Now the Quebec man said, "Being as the Quebecois''s (is that right?) are a superior race, I want a wall a mile high and a mile thick all the way around Quebec so no one can get in, and no one can get out. So the genie snapped his fingers, and transported the Quebecois to Quebec so there were no problems. The Newfie stepped up and said, "Ok, it''s a mile high and a mile thick, and no one can get in or out right?" "Correct." said the genie. "Fill it with water."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eagles may soar, but weasels don''t get sucked into jet engines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I drive way too fast to worry about my cholesterol.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Success is relative. The more success, the more relatives!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When everything is coming your way, you''re on the wrong side of the freeway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Laundromat sign: Automatic Washing Machines: Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign at an office: Would the person who removed the step ladder yesterday kindly bring it back or further steps will be taken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign at an office kitchen: After the tea break, the staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the drain-board.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('antique-an item your grandparents bought, your parents got rid of, and you''re buying again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack told me you told him that I told you that he was ugly, and I told you not to tell him I told you that! It''s his fault! I told him not to tell you I told him what you told me! Well, don''t let it happen again--and don''t tell him I told you he told me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good way to save face is to keep the lower half shut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Silence is golden, because you never have to explain something you didn''t say.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m such an insomniac, the sheep fall asleep before I do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, when she walks by the television set you miss three episodes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know the day I gave up exercise. You wanna know? Check my birth certificate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so fat when she wears high heels 2 hours later they''re flip flops.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mom is so fat she rolled over a SuperNintendo and made 4 Game Boys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom is so fat her picture fell down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mom is so fat, she''s the only one at the beach that gets a tan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she had a dream of marshmallows, and when she woke up, her pillows were gone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so fat she uses pillows for pantyliners Your momma so fat she got stuck in the Grand Canyon', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so ugly when she walked through the graveyard 2 men came after her with shovels.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat when she sat on a rainbow skittles came out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so fat when she broke a leg gravy came out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so ugly when she went to the horse track people started placing bets on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk guy stumbles into the bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "No way, you''ve had enough." So the drunk leaves. The drunk then enters the bar from the rear door and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender refuses and asks the drunk to leave. The drunk comes back into the bar through the front door and asks for a drink. The bartender says, "Listen, I''m not giving you a damn drink, you''re already drunk enough." The drunk says, "DAMN, MAN! How many bars do you work at?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into the bar and orders a round of beer for everyone. He even tells the bartender to pour himself one. So the bartender gives everyone the round and pours one for himself. He asks the man to pay, but the man says he has no money. The bartender is pissed so he beats up the man pretty bad then throws him out. The next day the same man walks back in and orders a round of beer for everyone and even tells the bartender to give himself one. The bartender thinks the man isn''t stupid enough to do the same thing twice, so he does it and asks the man to pay. So the man says again he has no money. Again the man is beat up and thrown out. The next day the man comes back in and tells the bartender to give a round of beers to everyone. The bartender replies in an angry voice, "What? No beer for me this time?" The man says, "No way man, you''re violent when you drink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 cops are sitting in their car outside of a local bar. They were waiting to see if anyone would drive home drunk. A guy stumbles out, obviously drunk out of his mind. He falls down flat on his face. 5 bar patrons leave the bar. The cops don''t care about the other patrons, they are just waiting for him to start up his car. He falls again on his face. 5 more patrons leave the bar. Finally the drunk stumbles to his car door and opens it up and sits inside. 6 patrons leave the bar. Finally the drunk starts up his car but before he could move the cops are on him sticking a breathalyzer in his face. He takes the test and passes with blood alcohol level of 0.00. The cops are pissed and asked him what the hell he was doing. The drunk replies, "I''m the designated decoy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk is out drinking and he gets really wasted. He looks at the time and it''s 3 a.m. He screams and heads home before his wife screams at him. He tries to walk but he can''t. His legs won''t work. Figuring he''s too drunk to walk home he crawls. It was long and hard but he makes it home in a half hour. He silently crawls into bed and his wife is still sound asleep. He relaxes and lays back. Then his wife whispers, "I know you''ve been out drinking and right now your wasted." The man whispers, "No I haven''t, and no I''m not." The woman replies, "Then where''s your wheelchair?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into the bar and orders a scotch. He gulps it down, and looks in his hand. He orders another one. He gulps it down and orders another one. He again looks in his hand. He orders 2 scotches this time and gulps them both down. He looks in his hand. The bartender, curious, asks the man what''s going on. The man replies, "It''s a picture of my wife. When she starts to look good, I''m going home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Several elderly nuns were in their second floor convent one night when a fire broke out. They took their habits off, tied them together to make a rope, and climbed out the window. After they were safely on the ground and out of the building, a news reporter came over to one of the nuns and said to her, "Weren''t you afraid that the habits could have ripped or broken since they are old?" The nun replied, "Nah, don''t you know old habits are hard to break?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A burglar had just broken into a house and was stealing anything he could get his hands on. Then he heard a voice. It said, "Jesus is watching you." Thinking its in his head he continues on his business. Then he hears it again, "Jesus is watching you." The burglar not very religious but still scared says, "Who are you?" Then he flipped on the light not caring if he was caught by the house owners. All he sees is a parrot in the corner. The parrot then says, "Jesus is watching you." The burglar asks the parrot his name. The parrot replied, "Satan." The burglar laughs and says, "Who would name their parrot Satan?" The parrot says, "Same person who would name their rottweiler Jesus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walked in a library and went to the librarian, pulls out a thick book and started screaming at her. She yells, "THIS BOOK IS HORRIBLE! THERE ARE TOO MANY CHARACTERS AND NO PLOT WHATSOEVER!" The librarian stares at her, then calmly replies, "So you''re the one who took our phone book."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a redneck and his redneck wife. The wife didn''t want another child, and asked the redneck husband to get surgery so he can''t impregnate his wife. The redneck goes to a very expensive doctor. The doctor who is in a hurry and is sure the redneck can''t pay for his operation, just hands the redneck a firecracker and says, "Light this, hold it, count to 10." The redneck is confused but the doctor seems to know what he''s doing. The redneck goes home and lights the firecracker. He starts counting with the aid of his fingers... "1...2...3...4...5..." The redneck pauses, puts the firecracker between his legs and resumes counting on the other hand....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are in the woods camping out when a bear attacks them. While the bear sniffs around the food, the first guy starts lacing up his sneakers. The second guys goes, "Are you crazy? You can''t outrun a bear!" The first guy replies, "I dont need to; I only have to outrun you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat that the local restaurant says :Maximum occupancy 115 people or yo mama.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat that when she ran away they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror her reflection ducks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so fat that when she layed on the beach, four guys from greenpeace tried to throw her back in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is said that "it is always in the last place you look" Well of course! Are there some people out there who keep looking after they find it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a boomerang that doesn''t work? A stick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse walked into a bar. The barman said, "Why the long face?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender says, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?" The guy says, "You would be drinking fast if you had what I have." The bartender says, "What do you have?" The guy says, "75 cents."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TO: Boss FROM: Blondie RE: Changing Calendars from Y2K I hope that I haven''t misunderstood your instructions because, to be honest, none of this Y to K problem made much sense to me. At any rate, I have finished the conversion of all of the months on all of the company calendars for next year. The calendars have returned from the printer and are ready to be distributed with the following new months: Januark Februark Mak Julk I also changed all the days of each week to: Sundak Mondak Tuesdak Wednesdak Thursdak Fridak Saturdak We are now Y to K compliant. Have a nice dak!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four guys are drinking in a bar, bragging about their sons. "My son," the first one says, "started out washing cars at dealership, but now owns the dealership and just gave one of his friends four new cars of his choice!" "My son," said the second, "started out serving lunch in a real estate office, but now owns the real estate office and just gave one of his friends a new mansion!" "My son," said the third, "started out sweeping the floors at the Stock Exchange, but now practically owns the Stock Exchange and just gave one of his friends a $1,000,000 in stock." "Well," the fourth guy said, "my son''s turned out to be a bit of a disappointment. He''s a gay hairdresser and he has SEVERAL boyfriends. On the plus side, between them, they gave him four cars, a mansion, and a million dollars in stock for his birthday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a secretary is leaving on her lunch break, and she notices her boss standing in front of a shredder with a clueless look on his face. The secretary walks up to him and asks if he needs help. "Yes!" he says looking and sounding relieved, "This is very important." Glad to help, she turns the shredder on and inserts the paper. Then her boss says, "Thanks, I only need one copy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. Who''s there? Dwayne Dwayne who? Dwayne the bathtub mommy, I''m dwowning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Dad said to yo mama, "We''re getting a color TV!" and yo mama asked, "What color?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom is so stupid, when the doctor told her she had to take a pregnancy test, she asked how long she had to study', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid she waited at a Stop sign until it said Go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid, she climbed over a glass wall to see the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid she stole a free sample.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid she couldn''t even pass a blood test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid she thinks these jokes are funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she got locked in McDonalds, and lost 300 pounds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so poor, I walked in and dropped a cigarette butt on the floor, and she said, "Clap your hands and stomp your feet, praise the Lord, we got heat".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she put a free sample on layaway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so poor that when I walked in the front door, I tripped over the back gate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual headline: "Include Your Children When Baking Cookies"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual headline: "Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual headline: Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual headline: Deer Kill 17,000', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands. This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver''s license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend or significant other. DANGEROUS: What''s for dinner? SAFER: Can I help you with dinner? SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner? DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT? SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown. SAFEST: Wow! Look at you! DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about? SAFER: Could we be overreacting? SAFEST: Here''s fifty dollars. DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that? SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left. SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that? DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day? SAFER: I hope you didn''t overdo it today. SAFEST: I''ve always loved you in that robe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde has just inherited a Ranch but only had two horses. The problem was she couldn''t tell them apart. So she goes to her neighbor rancher and asks for help. He suggests cutting ones tail a bit shorter then the other. She does it but then a week later she comes back and tells the neighbor rancher that it grew back. So he tells her to tie a different colored string around one of the horses neck. She does it but a week later the tie slips off and she has to go back to the neighbor. So he suggest she paint a different color spot on each of the horses. She does and comes back a week later with cookies. She tells the neighbor rancher, "Here I baked these for you. Your plan worked perfectly. I painted a red spot on the black horse and a blue spot on the white horse."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a Rhino from charging? Take away its credit card.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many actors does it take to change a light bulb? Only one-they don''t like to share the spotlight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many aerobics instructors does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Five. Four to do it in perfect synchrony and one to stand there going "To the left, and to the left, and to the left, and to the left, and take it out, and put it down, and pick it up, and put it in, and to the right, and to the right, and to the right, and to the right..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many auto mechanics does it take to change a light bulb? A: Six - One to force it with a hammer and five to go out for more bulbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PARATROOPER A young army private is home on leave. He is talking to his dad about his experience at jump school while learning to be a paratrooper. "Dad" he says, "on my first jump, I froze up at the door on the plane. A big black sergeant standing behind me told me that if I didn''''t jump, he was gonna cram about 12 inches of dick up my ass." "Well did you jump?" asks his dad. "Just a little at first" answered the boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a short psychic on the lam? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A small medium at large!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you praise a computer? Say "Data Boy"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men, two brunettes and a blond, are being chased by a tiger through the jungle. They get to a river and have two choices: 1. Get across the river without being eaten by pirannhas or 2. Get eaten by the tiger. They spot a genie and the genie says I can grant you one wish.. The first blond man thinks "I wish I can get across safely." He swims across and makes it without a scratch. The second blond man says "I want to be even smarter than the first man." He climbed onto a raft and paddled across. The brunette thinks "I want to be the smartest of them all". Instantly, he turned into a woman, and she walked across a nearby bridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a cat dies and goes to heaven. God meets him at the gate and says,"You''ve been a good cat all of your life, anything you want is yours." The cat says"Well, I lived with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wood floor." Instantly, a fluffy pillow appears. The cat hops onto it and falls asleep. A week later, five mice die and go to heaven as well. God meets them at the gate and makes them the same offer. They reply "All of our life, we''ve been chased by cats, dogs, and women with brooms. If only we didn''t have to run anymore...." They are each fitted with a custom pair of roller skates. A month later, God decides to check up on the cat. He asks "How are you doing? Are you happy?" Kitty answers " Life here is SUPER! Oh, and by the way, those meals on wheels you''ve been sending over are the best!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor who works at the mental hospital wants to take his patients out to a baseball game seeing as they''re so well behaved. He goes to his colleagues and asks them if it''s ok. They don''t want to let him take them in case they misbehave or do something wrong seeing as they''re complete nutcases. But the doctor wants to show them that the patients are really good. So he brings them in and says, "Sit Nuts." And all the patients sit. He then says, "Stand Nuts." And all the patients stand. He then says "Talk Nuts." And they all start chatting. The other doctors are impressed and agree its ok. So they go to the stadium and the doctor leaves to go get snacks. When he comes back out everyone is running and screaming. He stops a guy and asks him what the heck is happening. The man replies, "The vendor came by and started yelling PEANUTS! and a bunch of people started pissing all over the place."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a shoe store and asks to try on a pair of shoes. They were a bit snug. "Well, they feel a bit tight," says the man. The salesman bends down and feels around. He suggests pulling the tongue out, then asks, "How do they feel now?" "Well, dey shtill feel a bit thight"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is sitting at his register and a beautiful young women comes in asking to use the bathroom. Even though she is beautiful the man refuses to let her use it. At least until she buys something. So she buys a pack of gum and then asks again. He says, "yes." She comes out a few minutes later, and in her most seductive voice starts talking to him, she slips her finger in his mouth and lets him lick it for awhile. After a while she pops her finger out of his mouth and says, "You''re out of toilet paper."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is at the gates of heaven, but his life was very borderline good and bad; so St. Peter decides to have a contest. He gives the choice of the man answering a question or asking a question. If the man cannot get the answer he''s asked or St. Peter can''t answer the question then the man gets into heaven. The man decides to ask. He takes a piece of paper, pokes 1000 holes in it, and puts it to his butt and farts. He then asks St. Peter, "Which hole did my fart come out of?" St. Peter replies, "That''s easy; this one," and he points to a hole. The man smiles and says, "Nope! It came out of this one!" and he points to his ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men, a French, Chinese, and American, decided to have a contest. They wanted to see whose dog could go the longest without going to the bathroom. The Chinese man won after a few hours. A news reporter asked him how he acheived such a feat. He replied, in a rather sing-song way, "Me Chinese, me no dumb, me stick rock up doggie''s bum!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was on a bridge as a news reporter walked by. She was told that if she didn''t cover another story in 2 hours, she''d be fired. All of a sudden, the man starts to count "1,2,.." "Wait!" interrupts the reporter. "What is it?" "What are you trying to do?" "I''m going to commit suicide." "May I join you?" "Certainly." The two shout "1,2..." They''re interrupted by a man walking down the street. "May I join you?" he asks. "Sure." "1,2..." As soon as the two men said 3, they jumped off, but the clever reporter stayed behind. "3,2,1, and cue!" "Good evening, I am just arriving at the scene of a crime. Two men just jumped off of this bridge."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A truck driver was driving down the highway when he saw a priest at the side of the road. He stopped to pick up the priest and give him a ride. A ways down the road the truck driver saw a lawyer on the side of the road. He turned the truck on a direct course with the lawyer. Then he thought ''Oh no, I have a priest in the truck. I can''t run down this lawyer!'' and at the last second the truck driver swerved to miss the lawyer. But, the truck driver heard a thump outside of the truck. He looked in his rear-view mirror but didn''t see anything. He turned to the priest and said ''Sorry Father, I just missed that lawyer at the side of the road.'' The priest said ''Don''t worry son, I got him with my door''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him "What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?" The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street." Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the record, and after a moment Gabriel affirmed that this was true. Saint Peter said, "Well, that''s fine, but it''s not really quite enough to get you into Heaven." The Lawyer said, "Wait Wait! There''s more! Three years ago I also gave a homeless person a quarter." Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who after a moment nodded back, affirming this, too, had been verified. Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we do with this fellow?" Gabriel gave the Lawyer a sidelong glance, then said to Saint Peter, "Let''s give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After successfully passing the bar exam, a young man opened his own law office. One day he was sitting idle at his desk when his secretary announced that a Mr. Jones had arrived to see him. "Show him right in!" the lawyer replied. As Mr. Jones was being ushered in the lawyer had an idea. He quickly picked up the phone and shouted into it "...and you tell them that we won''t accept less then fifty thousand dollars, and don''t even call me until you agree to that amount!" Slamming the phone down he stood up and greeted Mr. Jones, "Good morning, Mr. Jones, what can I do for you?" "I''m from the telphone company," Mr. Jones replied. "I''m here to connect that phone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why won''t sharks attack lawyers? A: Professional courtesy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? A: Not enough sand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What can a goose do, a duck can''t, and a lawyer should? A: Stick his bill up his rear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Boo! Boo who? Don''t cry it''s just a joke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two (think about it)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redhead, a brunette, and a blonde are all about to be shot by a firing squad. The redhead goes out first and stands in front of them. Right before they shoot, the redhead screams, "Tornado!" The firing squad turns to look, and the redhead runs away. The brunette is up next, and decides it would be a good idea to to do the same thing that the redhead did. So, just as the firing squad is about to shoot, she screams, "Earthquake!" The firing squad looks around for a moment, distracted, giving the brunette just enough time to run away. Then the blonde comes up and decides to copy the redhead and the brunette. Just as the firing squad is about to shoot, the blonde screams, "Fire!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman are in a lamaze class, and the woman is 7 months pregnant. In this class, the lamaze instructor is trying to get the husbands to understand what their wives are going through. All the men put on fake bellies, and the lamaze instructor walks up to the first man and drops a pencil in front of him. "Okay, now pick up that pencil exactly as your wife would," says the lamaze instructor. The husband smiles slyly. "You want me to pick it up ''exactly'' how my wife would? He asks. "Yes, exactly how your wife would," the lamaze instructor repeats, impatiently. The man looks at his wife, and says, "Honey, pick up that pencil."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bad news: A man fell out of an airplane Good news: He had a parachute Bad news: The parachute didn''t work Good news: There was a haystack beneath him Bad news: There was a pitchfork in the haystack Good news: He missed the pitchfork Bad news: He missed the haystack', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks up to the bartender in a bar and says, "I bet you twenty dollars I can pee into that cup over there." He points to a cup over the bar about 4 feet away. The bartender says sure, positive that the man can''t do it and he''s about to make 20 bucks. Sure enough, the man ends up peeing all over the bar, anywhere but in the cup. The bartender, laughing, collects twenty dollars. The man is still smiling. Curious, the bartender asks, "You just lost your bet. Why are you smiling?" "Well," said the man, "I just bet that man over there that I could pee all over your bar and you wouldn''t do anything but laugh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pig walks into a bar and asks for a glass of water. It drinks it, then asks where the bathroom is. The bartender points him in the right direction and pays no more attention to the pig. Another pig walks into the bar, orders two glasses of water. He drinks them and asks where the bathroom is. The bartender points him in the right direction and then turns his attention back to his work. A third pig walks in, orders five glasses of water, and drinks them all down. He gets up to leave and says goodbye to the bartender. "Wait," says the bartender, curious, "Aren''t you going to ask where the bathroom is?" "Nope," says the pig, "I''m the pig that goes wee wee wee all the way home." -Courtesy of my cousin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red Violets are blue I''m schizophrenic And so am I!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Alaska Department of Fish and Game recently issued this warning... "Warning: In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts, the Alaska Department of Fish and Game is advising hikers, hunters and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert of bears while in the field. We advise outdoorsmen to wear noisy little bells on their clothing, so as not to startle bears that aren''t expecting them. We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear. It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity. Outdoorsmen should recognise the difference between black bear and grizzly bear manure: Black bear manure is smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur. Grizzly bear manure has little bells in it and smells like pepper."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children were called upon in a classroom to make sentences with words chosen by the teacher. The teacher smiled when Jack raised his hand to participate. She gave him the words ''defeat'', ''deduct'', ''defence'' and ''detail''. Jack stood seriously for a while with all eyes focused on him awaiting his reply. "Defeat of Deduct went over defence before detail!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat, she went to buy a water bed and they put a blanket over the Altantic Ocean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are out driving, and the brunette tells the blonde to look out for cops - especially cops with their lights on. After they''ve been driving for a while, the brunette asks the blonde if she''s seen any cops. "Yes," says the blonde. "Are their lights on?" The blonde has to think for a moment, then says, "Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blonds decided to go shopping. A few hours later they come out and the first blond realizes that she has locked her keys in the car, so they spent a few hours pacing around the car trying to figure out what to do. Finally, the first blond looks off into the distance and sees storm clouds. She turns to her friend and says, "Quick, think of something because a storm is coming and I left the convertible top open!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar with his dog on a leash the barman says, "Geez that''s a weird dog; he''s stumpy-legged, pink, and doesn''t have a tail, but I bet my rottweiler would beat the heck out of it." 50 bucks is laid down. Out in the yard the rottweiler gets mauled to pieces. Another drinker says his pit bull will win, but the bet is 100 bucks. Another trip to the yard and when it''s finished there are bits of pit-bull terrier all over the place. The drinker pays up and asks, "Say what breed is that anyway?" The owner says, "Until I cut his tail off and painted it pink it was the same breed as every other alligator."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Looking in the mall for a nightgown, I tried my luck in a store known for its sexy lingerie. To my delight, however, I found just what I was looking for. Waiting in the line to pay, I noticed a young woman behind me holding the same item. This confirmed what I suspected all along: despite being over 50, I still have a very "with it" attitude. "I see we have the same taste," I said proudly to the 20- something behind me. "Yes," she replied. "I''m getting this for my grandmother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was teaching my 6-year-old daughter how to unbuckle her seat belt. She asked, "Do I click the square?" I said yes. She then asked me, "Single click or double click?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, an old man went to a teenager with spiked hair. He asked him, "Have you done anything crazy in your life?" The teen replied, "No". So the old man said, "Well, about 15 years ago, I was drunk, and I saw a porcupine. Now I am wondering if you are my son."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a teen went to the docter, and said: "DOCTOR! Whenever I go to the bathroom, nickels come out!" The docter replies, "Drink lots of water, and keep your feet elevated." The next week, the teen comes back and says that dimes come out. The doctor says the same thing. Next week, he says that quarters are coming. Then half dollars. The doctor finally replies, "You''re at the time where you go through change."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Eve was first created, she had 3 breasts. She asks God, "What shall I do with this extra breast?" And God created Adam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald MacDonald from the Isle of Skye went to study at an English university and was living in the hall of residence with all the other students there. After he had been there a month, his mother came to visit him. "And how do you find the English students, Donald?" she asked. "Mother," he replied,"they''re such terrible, noisy people. The one on that side keeps banging his head on the wall and won''t stop. The one on the other side screams and screams all night." "Oh Donald! How do you manage to put up with these awful noisy English neighbors?" "Mother, I do nothing. I just ignore them. I just stay here quietly, playing my bagpipes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And will there be anything else, sir? the bellboy asked after setting out an elaborate dinner for two. "No, thank you," the gentleman replied. "That will be all." As the young man turned to leave, he noticed a beautiful satin negligee on the bed. "Anything for your wife?" he asked. "Yeah! That''s a good idea," the fellow said... "Please bring up a postcard. I''ll mail her a note!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other the woman leans out the window and yells, "PIG!!" The man immediately leans out his window and replies, "BITCH!!" They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet. After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, "Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?" The third fellow says, "I''ll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees." The first two guys were amazed. "Wow! What happened then?" they asked. The third man took a healthy swallow of his beer, sighed and uttered, "She said, ''Get out from under the bed and fight like a man.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hotdog walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender replies, "Sorry, we don''t serve food here".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are the blonde''s boobs square? She forgot to take the tissues out of the box!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if a dummy has been sending e-mail? You see a bunch of envelopes stuffed into the disk drive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do a blond''s braincells die? Alone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many law professors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge asks a defendant to stand. "You are charged with murdering a school teacher with a chain saw." From out of the audience a man shouts "You lying maggot!" "Silence in the court!" the judge shouted back. He turns to the defendant again and says, "You are also charged with killing a paperboy with a shovel." "You Goddamned tightwad!" blurted the spectator. "Quiet!" yelled the judge. "You are also charged with killing a mailman with an electric drill." "You cheap son of a..." the man starts to shout when the judge thunders back "If you don''t tell me the reason for your outbursts right now, I will hold you in contempt!" "I''ve lived next to that lying maggot for ten years now, but do you think he ever had a f*****g tool when I needed to borrow one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every Sunday 3 boys would go to church and confess. So the first boy went up to the priest. The priest says "What have you done bad in your life son". The boy responds with "I''ve swore to my mother." The priest says,"Take one sip of holy water." The second boys goes up to the priest and the priest asks, "What have you done bad in your life son?" The boy responds with, "I''ve stolen something". The priest says "Take two sips of holy water." After every sip the third boy is laughing his head off. So the third boy goes up to the priest and the priest says, "What have you done bad in your life son" The boy responds with, "I peed in the holy water."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursdays at 7:30 to 8:30, Please use the back door. Weight Watchers will meet at 7 p.m. Please use large double doors at the side entrance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb that when she got locked in the grocery store she starved to death!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama stinks so bad that when she puts on her ''Secret'' deodorant it tells! ha ha :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahead of him in line to see St. Peter. To his surprise, St. Peter left his desk at the gate and came down the long line to where the laywer was, and greeted him warmly. Then St. Peter and one of his assistants took the lawyer by the hands and guided him up to the front of the line, and into a comfortable chair by his desk. The lawyer said, "I don''t mind all this attention, but what makes me so special?" St. Peter replied, "Well, I''ve added up all the hours for which you billed your clients, and by my calculation you must be about 193 years old!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bumper sticker on your car reads: "What Would Dawson Do?" In the middle of an exam, you tell the professor you want to use a lifeline. You need to be tranquilized when the cable goes out. In the late evening, you look forward to sitting back and catching the latest informercial. If you''re a witness to an argument, you instinctually shout, "Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Jer-ry!" You try to impress the opposite sex by saying, "Hey, I get 120 channels!" Your entire CD collection consists of "Greatest Hits" albums by the decade. You have a gold-plated "clicker." Your intellectual discussions all stem from The Discovery Channel. After 15 minutes of work, you need a two-minute break.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three friends die and go to heaven. The first guy gets handcuffed to one of the ugliest girls there. ''''Why?'''' he asks. St. Paul replies, ''''When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.'''' The same happens to the second guy. He asks why. St. Paul replies, ''''When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.'''' The third guy laughs at his friends and says, ''''Thank God I didn''t do anything like that.'''' He gets handcuffed to the prettiest girl in heaven. The other two guys ask, ''''Why?'''' ''''Because when she was nine she killed a bird with a stone.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Your dog rather rub up against the wall than have you pet it. 2. All the numbers in your little black book start with "1-900." 3. Due to excessive hazing and ridicule, you decided to drop out of the Origami Club. 4. You were almost involved in a threesome, but your left hand fell asleep. 5. Fantasizing out loud before falling asleep is your idea of "pillow talk." 6. Your personal ad reads: "Seeking Anybody." 7. Next to your name in the phone directory, the phone number is replaced with the phrase "Who cares?" 8. You look forward to the dinner time calls from telemarketers. 9. The last time you were invited to a party, you were grooving to the lyric, "Put your right foot in, take your right foot out." 10. You spent last summer following around the 2000 Bible Belt Trekkie Convention Tour.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy was in his room playing with himself, when his father walked in. "Son! If you masturbate too much, you''re gonna go blind!" "Dad," the boy said, "I''m over here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest wanted to convince a prostitute to turn respectable. So he met with her one day and began slowly warming up to her. "Oh, my child," he said, "your dress is most lovely." "Thank you, Father," she replied. The radio was playing and they danced a little as they talked. "Oh, my child," said the priest, "your conversation is most lovely." "Thank you, Father," said the prostitute. Finally, the priest sat her down and said, "Oh, my child, there is one thing I have against you." And the prostitute said, "Yes, I know, Father. I felt it while we were dancing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you get any under the tree? I think your balls are hanging too low. Check out Rudolph''s honker! Santa''s sack is really bulging. Lift up the skirt so I can get a whiff. Did you get a piece of the fruitcake? I love licking the end till it''s really sharp and pointy. From here you can''t tell if they''re artificial or real. Can I interest you in some dark meat? To get it to stand up straight, try propping it against the wall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and it immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse''s mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse''s neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly ignorant of its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, the blonde attempts to leap away from the horse and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup, and she is now at the mercy of the horse''s pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over. She starts to lose consciousness, but to her great fortune, Bobby, the Wal-Mart greeter, sees her and unplugs the horse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was having sharp pains in her side. The doctor examined her and said, "You have acute appendicitis." The blonde yelled at the doctor, "I came here to get medical help, not get a stupid compliment!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish confessing to adultery. One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, "If I hear one more person confess to adultery, I''ll quit!" Well, everyone liked him, so they came up with a code word. Someone who had committed adultery would say instead that they had ''fallen.'' This seemed to satisfy the old priest and things went well until the priest passed away at a ripe old age. A few days after the new priest arrived, he visited the mayor of the town and seemed very concerned. "Mayor, you have to do something about the sidewalks in town. When people come into the confessional, they keep telling me they''ve fallen." The mayor started to laugh, realizing that no one had told the new priest about the code word. But, before he could explain, the priest shook an accusing finger at him and shouted, "I don''t know what you''re laughing about, because your wife has fallen three times this week!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a set of twin alligators that grew up in the same bayou. One, however, was much larger and stronger than the other. One day the twins were sitting there talking, and trying to figure out why one was so much bigger - since they were the same age, had the same genes, and grew up in the same place. The bigger alligator asked his smaller brother where he had been feeding. The smaller said, "down in that parking lot at the end of the bayou, why?". The bigger said, "well, thats where I feed too, what''s your technique?" The smaller then looked at him and said "well, I go over to one of those lawyers cars, and hide up under it, when he comes out, I grab him, shake the shit out of him, and then eat him." The larger then exclaimed, "that''s it! by the time you shake the shit out of a lawyer, there''s nothing left but the briefcase!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do women fart less than men? A: Because they won''t shut up long enough to build up pressure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never forget a face. However, in your case, I''ll be glad to make an exception. -Groucho Marx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our lager, Which art in barrels, Hallowed be thy drink. Thy will be drunk, I will be drunk, At home as it is in the tavern. Give us this day our foamy head, And forgive us our spillages, As we forgive those who spill against us. And lead us not to incarceration, But deliver us from hangovers. For thine is the beer, The bitter, The lager.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an honest lawyer? An oxymoron.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a bar. He sits down and starts staring at a young punk with spiked red hair, multicolored clothes, and an earring. The punk gets mad turns around and says, "Hey old man, what are you looking at?" The old man says, "Nothing, it''s just that when I was in the army, I got really drunk and had sex with a parrot. I was wondering if you were my son."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So ... the other day, my friends and I went to this "Ladies Night Club." One of the girls wanted to impress us, so she pulls out a $10 bill. The "dancer" came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 and put it on his butt cheek. Not to be outdone, another friend pulls out a $20 bill. She calls the guy back over, licks the $20 bill and puts it on his other butt cheek. Still attempting to impress the rest of us, my other friend pulls out a $50 bill. She calls the guy back over again, licks the $50 bill and again puts it on one of his butt cheeks. Now the attention is focused on me. What could I do to top that? I got out my wallet, thought for a minute ... and then the financial analyst in me took over. I got out my ATM card, swiped it down the crack of his ass, grabbed the $80 bucks and went home!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was sitting down in a bar one day next to a red-head. Both of them were sitting there having a good time and then the news turned on. The woman reporter shouted out "This just in! A man is at the edge of a cliff attempting to jump!". Then the red-head leans over to the blonde and whispers, "I bet you $50 that the man''s gonna jump!" The blonde responds back "That''s a bet you have there!". So, both of the women stared at the news waiting to know what''s gonna happen. Then, the man jumps! The blonde turns around to the red-head and hands her the $50. The red-head feeling guilty said "I cant take that there money. I saw the news earlier this mornin'', I knew he was gonna jump off that there cliff." And the blonde says "Well, I did too! But I never would have thought that the man would do it again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, blonde and a redhead walk into a bar. The bartender tells them there is a magic mirror in the back room and if you stand in front of it and say something you think that''s true you''ll get something nice. But if you lie you''ll be sucked in, never to be heard from again. The brunette says, "I think I am the prettiest person in the bar," and she gets a brand new Corvette. The redhead says, "I think I am the smartest person in the bar," and she gets 1 million dollars. The blonde says, "I think---" And she disappeared.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Santa Claus, the tooth fairy an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A: The old drunk of course; the other three are mythical creatures.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a group of eminent scientists got together and decided that mankind had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one scientist to go and tell Him that they were done with Him. The scientist walked up to God and said, "God, we''ve decided that we no longer nee You. We''re at the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, sop why don''t You just retire?" God listened very patiently to the man and then said, "Very well, but first, how about this: Let''s have a man-making contest." To which the scientist replied, "Okay, great!" But God added, "Now we''re going to do this just like I did back in the old days with Adam." The scientist said "Sure, no problem!" and bent down and grabbed himself a handful of dirt. God looked at him and said, "No, no, no. You got to get your own dirt!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Diplomacy: The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three blondes living together. Blonde #1 was coming back from grocery shopping, and she dropped her keys. She walked down the stairs to get them, and she said to herself, "Am I going up the stairs or down the stairs?" So she stood there puzzled, the bags of groceries still in her hands. Blonde #2 was taking a bath, and was draining the tub because it was too cold. With her hair still dry she said to herself, "Was I getting in the tub or out of the tub?" She stood there, just thinking about it. Blonde #3 was sitting in the living room in front of the coffee table, and she said to herself, "Knock on wood I''m not as stupid as the other two!" She knocked on the table. "Was that the front door or the back door?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why didn''t the skeleton go to the dance? A: Because it had no body to go with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does a fish use to get high? A: Seaweed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do a tornado and a redneck divorce have in common? A: In the end, someone''s gonna lose a trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows. We went to look for it and while I was rooting around I noticed that one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail and sure enough, there was my wife''s golf ball... stuck right in the middle of the cows butt. That''s when I made my mistake." "What did you do?" asks the doctor. "Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, ''Hey, this looks like yours!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Nancy was in the backyard filling in a hole when her neighbour peered over the fence. Interested in what the girl was up to he asks, "What are you up to there Nancy?" "My goldfish died," replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, "and I''ve just buried him." The neighbour was concerned, "That''s an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn''t it?" Nancy patted down the last heap of earth and then replied, "That''s because he''s inside your f*****g cat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just before Thanksgiving, the holding pen was abuzz as Mother Turkey scolded the younger birds. "You turkeys are always into mischief," she gobbled. "If your grandfather could see the things you do, he''d turn over in his gravy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bartender at our golf club named a drink Lilac Crazy in honour of one of the members. Every time the member came to the 19th hole, that''s exactly what he did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is writing a problem on the blackboard when she turns around and says, "If you are stupid, please stand up." After a while, a student stands up and says,"I really don''t think I''m stupid, but I feel bad for you standing there by yourself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off. "How did this happen?" the emergency room doctor asked her. "Well, I was trying to commit suicide," the blonde replied. "What?" sputtered the doctor. "You tried to commit suicide by shooting your finger off?" "No, Silly!" the blonde said. "First I put the gun to my chest, and I thought: I just paid $6,000.00 for these breast implants, I''m not shooting myself in the chest." "So then?" asked the doctor. "Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought: I just paid $3000.00 to get my teeth straightened, I''m not shooting myself in the mouth." "So then?" "Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oscar drove his brand new Mercedes car to his favorite sporting goods store. He parked it outside and went in to do a little perusing with Jan, his regular sales woman. Jan was a pretty blonde, and as Oscar walked into the store, she happily greeted him. But he requested to look around alone today before he needed her help. She obliged and let him do his thing. Five minutes later, Jan came running up to him yelling, "Oscar! Oscar! I just saw someone driving off with your new Mercedes!" "Dear God! Did you try to stop him?" "No," she said, "I did better than that! I got the license plate number!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this guy who was married to a blonde, and each night he came home with a new blonde joke. One night the wife got mad and decided to show him that she wasn''t dumb. She spent the whole next day learning all the states and capitals. That night when he got home he told his joke. She says, "I''m not so dumb. I know all of the states and capitals. Go ahead, quiz me." He thought for a moment and asked, "What is the capital of Massachusetts?" She quickly replied, "M."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I''ve kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I''ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10, 000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A blonde." The blonde then pinned the note to the kid''s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10, 000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was swerving all over the road, driving very badly, so she got pulled over by a cop. The cop walked up to her window and asked, "Miss, why are you driving so recklessly?" The blonde said, "I''m sorry sir, but wherever I go, there''s always a tree in front of me and I can''t seem to get away from it!" The cop looked at her and said, "Lady, that''s your air freshener."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes realize that their apartment is on fire and go out onto the balcony. "Help, help!" yelled one of the blondes. "Help us, help us!" yelled the other. "Maybe it would help if we yelled together," said the first blonde. "Good idea," said the other. "Together, together!" they yelled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her...or something like that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back. What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell! She''s got a grenade in her mouth!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a blonde and a brunette working for a painting company. They need to paint the yellow lines on a road by hand for the city since the trucks are broken. The first day the blonde paints 5.4 miles of road, the brunette paints 6 miles of road. The second day the blonde paints 4.1 miles of road, the brunette paints 6.7 miles of road. The third day the blonde paints 2.9 miles of road, the brunette paints 6.9 miles of road. Worried about the blonde, the supervisor goes to the blonde and asks why she is painting less and less road each day. She replies, "The bucket just keeps getting further and further away."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde wanted to sell her car but failed many times. Even though the car looked pratically new it had over 400 000 miles on it. So she goes to a bar and theres a brunette sitting a few barstools away and she''s wearing mechanic''s overalls. They start talking and the blonde tells the brunette her problems. The brunette feels sorry for her. The brunette says, "Well I''m a mechanic. I can help you sell your car but it''s not legal." The blonde says she''ll do whatever it takes. The brunette says, "Well I can change your odometer back to 40 000 miles and it''ll be easier to sell." The blonde agrees and gives the brunette her keys. So the brunette takes the car back to her garage and sets back the counter. Then the next morning returns the car. A week later they run into each other and the brunette asks the blonde if she sold her car. The blonde says, "Why would I sell my car?? It only has 40 000 miles on it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On her birthday, a blonde was given a fishing rod. She decides to use the gift on the weekend and have a good time, so she goes and buys fishing gear and sets out. She goes to what she thinks is a nice fishing spot and drills a hole, then puts her rod in. She hears a man say, "There is no fish in there." So she goes someplace else and drills and puts her rod in. Then hears a man say in an irritated tone, "There is no fish in there." So she repeats the process a third time and again hears the man tell her, "There is no fish in there." Angry, the blonde gets up and faces the man and says, "How do you know there is no fish in there?" The man replies, "This is an ice hockey rink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say you are the perfect idiot. I say you are not perfect, but you are doing pretty good.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pirate walks into a bar and has a seat. The bartender notices the pirates peg-leg, eyepatch and hook for a hand. The bartender and the pirate start talking and the bartender casually slips in the question of how the pirate lost his leg. The pirate says, "I fell overboard and a shark bit my leg off." They talk more and the bartender asks how the pirate got the hook. The pirate says, "We were boarded by enemy pirates and they cut off my hand before running away. They talk some more and the bartender finally asks how the pirate got his eyepatch. The pirate said, "A seagull crapped in my eye." The bartender says, "Wow! You lost your eye to seagull poo in your eye?" The pirate says, "Well no... it was my first day with the hook."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and has a lot of drinks. He gets completely wasted. He mentions to the bartender that he has his girlfriend sitting in his new corvette outside so she can drive him home. While the bartender went outside to throw out the garbage he notices a corvette with a man and a woman making out in it. He goes back into the bar and tells the man to go check on his girl. The man leaves and comes back laughing and staggering a few minutes later. Confused the bartender asks what is so funny. The man replies, "My friend Bobby is so wasted he thinks he''s me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were going to Disneyland when they came to a fork in the road. The sign read: "Disneyland Left." So they went home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A junior partner in a law firm was sent to a far away country to represent a long-term client accused of robbery. After days of trial, the case was won, the client acquitted and released. Excited about his success, the attorney e-mailed the firm: "Justice prevailed." The senior partner replied in haste, "Appeal immediately."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers? He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren''t met.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man escaped jail by digging a hole from his jail cell to the outside world. When finally his work was done, he emerged in the middle of a preschool playground. "I''m free, I''m free!" he shouted. "So what," said a little girl. "I''m four."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During late spring one year, a blonde was trying out her new boat. She was unable to have her boat perform, travel through water, or do any maneuvers whatsoever no matter how hard she tried. After trying for over three days to make it work properly, she decided to seek help. She putted the boat over to the local marina in hopes that someone there could identify her problem. Workers determined that everything from the engine to the outdrive was working perfectly on the topside of the boat. So, a puzzled marina employee jumped into the water to check underneath the boat for problems. Because he was laughing so hard, he came up choking on water and gasping for air. Under the boat, still strapped in place securely, was the trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who took an hour to cook Minute Rice? Did you hear about the blonde who got into the taxi, and the driver kept the "Vacant" sign up? Did you hear about the blonde who was an M.D.--Mentally Deficient? Did you hear about the blonde who thought nitrates was cheaper than day rates?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t steal. The government hates competition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who got a pair of waterskis? She''s still looking for a lake with a slope!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between men and government bonds? The bonds mature. Eventually.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, a tub of cottage chesse, says to them, "We don''t serve your kind in here." One of the yogurt cartons says back to him, "Why not? We''re cultured individuals."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the word abbreviation so long?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now she''s 97 years old and we don''t know where the hell she is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following is an actual radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations: #1: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision. #2: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to south to avoid a collision. #1: This is the captain of a U. S. navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course. #2: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course. #1. THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER ENTERPRISE. WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE U. S. NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW! #2. This is a lighthouse. Your call.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants. "Well," he said, "I''ve been seeing this girl for a while and she''s really hot. I want the condoms because I think tonight''s "the" night. We''re having dinner with her parents, and then we''re going out, and I''ve got a feeling I''m gonna get lucky after that. Once she''s had me, she''ll want me all the time, so you''d better give me the 12 pack." The young man makes his purchase and leaves. Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessing, and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl leans over and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious person." He leans over to her and says, "You never told me that your father is a pharmacist."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Becky was on her deathbed, with her husband Jake at her side. He held her cold hand and tears silently streamed down his face. Her pale lips moved. "Jake," she said. "Hush," he quickly interrupted, "don''t talk." But she insisted. "Jake," she said in her tired voice. "I have to talk. I must confess." "There is nothing to confess," said the weeping Jake. "It''s all right. Everything''s all right." "No, no. I must die in peace. I must confess, Jake, that I have been unfaithful to you." Jake stroked her hand. "Now, Becky, don''t be concerned. I know all about it", he sobbed. "Why else would I poison you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Mr. Conners, Thank you for your letter of February 17th. After careful consideration I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me employment with your company. This year I have been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates it is impossible for me to accept all refusals. Despite Company 203''s outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet my needs at this time. Therefore I will initiate employment with your firm immediately following graduation. I look forward to seeing you then. Sincerely, XXXXXXXX', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married man and his secretary are having an affair. They decide to leave the office early one day and go to the secretary''s apartment for an afternoon of lovemaking. They fall asleep and don''t wake up until 8 o''clock that night. They quickly get dressed and the man asks his secretary to take his shoes and go rub them in the grass. The secretary thinks this is pretty weird, but she does it anyway. The man finally gets home and his wife meets him at the door. The wife is very upset and asks him where he has been. The husband replies, "I can not tell a lie. My secretary and I are having an affair. We left work early today, went to her place, made love all afternoon, and then we fell asleep. That''s why I''m late!" The wife looks at him, takes notice of his shoes and says, "I see those grass stains all over your shoes. You''ve been playing golf again, haven''t you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 women were playing golf. On the third hole there were 4 men in front of them but about 175 yards down the fairway. The first woman said, "I''ll tee off, he is far enough away." She hit the drive of her life, like a shot straight down the farway. She screamed fore at the top of her lungs and as the men turned he was hit solidly. He was rolling on the ground in pain with his hands between his legs. She ran to him, apologizing and saying, "Let me help I am a physical therapist." He protested but she got him to put his hands at his side. She unzipped his pants and began massaging him. "How does that feel?" she asked. He said, "Great, but my thumb still hurts like hell."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two beautiful statues were in a park, facing each other across the grass, one of a young girl and the other of a young man, looking towards each other like young lovers. These statues gave so much pleasure to people visiting the park that God looked down and decided to reward them with life for 30 minutes, on a Sunday when the park was closed to the public. Immediately when they came alive, they ran together into the bushes and could be heard giggling and cooing with pleasure and the bushes were shaking. After 15 minutes they came out and realised that they still had 15 minutes more life to live. "What shall we do now then," said the boy statue. "Let''s do the same thing again," she replied. "Okay," said the boy statue, "but this time, you hold the pidgeons down while I shit on them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and leave her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems OK, but after a while she slowly starts to fall over sideways in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately rush up to catch her and straighten her up. Again she seems OK, but after a while she starts to tilt to the other side. The nurses rush back and once more bring her back upright. This goes on all morning. Later the family arrives to see how the old woman is adjusting to her new home. They ask,"So Ma, how is it here? Are they treating you all right?" "It''s pretty nice," she replies. "Except they won''t let you fart."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A phone rings at KGB headquarters. "Hello?" "Hello, is this the KGB?" "Yes. What do you want?" "I''m calling to report my neighbor Yankel Rabinovitz as an enemy of the State. He is hiding undeclared diamonds in his fire wood." "This will be noted." The next day, the KGB goons visit Rabinovitz''s house. They search the shed where the fire wood is kept, break every piece of wood there, but find no diamonds. They swear at Yankel Rabinovitz and leave. The phone then rings at Rabinovitz''s house. "Hello, Yankel! Did the KGB come?" "Yes." "Did they chop up your firewood?" "Yes, they did." "Okay, now it''s your turn to call. I need my vegetable patch plowed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A baby boy was just born. He had all his pieces and looked quite normal, except that he was laughing - I mean laughing real hard. All the doctors and nurses were examining the little guy in front of his worried parents. He just kept on laughing, his tiny fists all closed and tears rolling from his eyes. One at a time, a pediatrician unfolded his tiny fingers to check if his hand was all right, and guess what he found? Scroll down. * * * * * * * * * * * * The birth control pill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married man goes to confessional and tells the priest, "I had an affair with a woman... almost." The priest says, "What do you mean, almost?" The man says, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped." The priest replies, "Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You''re not to go near that woman again. Now say five Hail Marys and put $50 in the poor box." The man leaves confessional, says his prayers, then walks over to the poor box. He pauses for a moment and starts to leave. The priest, who was watching him, quickly runs over and says, "I saw that! You didn''t put any money in the poor box!" The man replied, "Well, Father, I rubbed up against it, and you said it was the same as putting it in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a big ol'' tough bear strolling through the forest looking for some silly hunter to maul, when he suddenly got the urge to pass the last hunter he had eaten. He stopped by the side of the path and proceeded to dump away. Well, as he was sitting there, a cute little bunny came bounding along merrily on his way and stopped right beside the bear and also took a dump. Well, the bear was finishing up and hadn''t really said a word to the little bunny so popped a question, "Do you have trouble with shit sticking to your fur, little bunny?" The bunny looked up and replied, "Why no, certainly not." Immediately the bear picked up the bunny and wiped his ass with him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was mowing his front yard when his attractive, blonde, female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to her mailbox. She opened the mailbox, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into her house. A little later, she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and again slammed it shut. Angrily back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, the blonde came out again. She marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" She replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps telling me I have mail!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Canadian fire? A Calgary Flame.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Monica Lewinski and a coin machine have in common? insert bill here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was driving home late one afternoon above the speed limit. He noticed a police car with its red lights in his rearview mirror. He thought, "I can outrun this guy," so he floored it and the race was on. The cars were racing down the highway at 90 miles an hour. Finally, as his speedometer passed 100, the guy figured, "What the heck," and gave up. He pulled over to the curb. The police officer got out of his cruiser and approached the car. He leaned down and said, "Listen mister, I''ve had a really lousy day, and I just want to go home. Give me a good excuse and I''ll let you go." The man thought for a moment and said, "Three weeks ago, my wife ran off with a police officer. When I saw your cruiser in my rearview mirror, I thought you were that officer and you were trying to give her back to me!" The officer let him go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde woman is driving down the road. She notices that she''s low on gas, so she stops at a gas station. While she''s pumping her gas, she notices that she locked the keys in the car. So when she goes inside to pay, she asks the attendant for a hanger so that she can attempt to open the door herself. She returns outside and begins to jimmy the lock. Ten minutes later, the attendant comes out to see how the blonde is faring. Outside the car, the blonde is moving the hanger around and around while the blonde inside the car is saying, "A little more to the left...a little more to the right!..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two young engineers applied for a single position at a computer company. They both had the same qualifications. In order to determine which individual to hire, the applicants were asked to take a test by the Department manager. Upon completion of the test, both men missed only one of the questions. The manager went to the first applicant and said, "Thank you for your interest, but we''ve decided to give the job to the other applicant." "And why would you be doing that? We both got 9 questions correct," asked the rejected applicant. "We have based our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question you missed," said the Department manager. "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other?" the rejected applicant inquired. "Simple," said the Department manager, "Your fellow applicant put down on question #5, ''I don''t know.'' You put down, ''Neither do I.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling. "WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE MY HORSE?" he yelled with surprising forcefulness. No one answered. "ALRIGHT, I''M GONNA HAVE ANOTHA BEER, AND IF MY HORSE AIN''T BACK OUTSIDE BY THE TIME I FINISH, I''M GONNA DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS! AND I DON''T LIKE TO HAVE TO DO WHAT I DUN IN TEXAS!" Some of the locals shifted restlessly. He had another beer, walked outside, and his horse was back! He saddled-up and started to ride out of town. The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, "Say partner, before you go... what happened in Texas?" The cowboy turned back and said, "I had to walk home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Delta Airlines recently introduced a special half-fare rate for wives accompanying their husbands on business trips. Anticipating some valuable testimonials, the publicity department of the airline sent out letters to all the wives of businessmen who used the special rates, asking them how they enjoyed their trip. Responses are still pouring in asking, "What trip?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?" "None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away." "Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you''re thinking." Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?" "Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone." "No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you''re thinking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a recent publicity outing, Hillary sneaked off to visit a fortune teller of some local repute. In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news. "There''s no easy way to say this, so I''ll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year." Visibly shaken, Hillary stared at the woman''s lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself. She simply had to know. She met the fortune teller''s gaze, steadied her voice, and asked her question. "Will I be acquitted?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is from a contest on Long Island. The requirements were to use the words Lewinski and Kaczynski in a limerick. Here are the 3 winners. Entry # 1 There once was a gal named Lewinsky Who played on a flute like Stravinsky ''Twas "Hail to the Chief" on this flute made of beef that stole the front page from Kaczynski. Entry # 2 Said Bill Clinton to young Ms. Lewinsky We don''t want to leave clues like Kaczynski, Since you look such a mess, use the hem of your dress And wipe that stuff off of your chinsky. Entry # 3 Lewinsky and Clinton have shown what Kaczynski must surely have known: that an intern is better than a bomb in a letter given the choice of how to be blown.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To help students remember the word for "wear" in Latin, the professor used the phrase: semper ubi, sub ubi Translation: Always wear under wear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You don''t have anything in your head except soccer, said a wife to her husband. "I''m sure you''ve even forgotten when we got married!" "Of course I haven''t forgotten," replied the husband. "That was the day England beat Italy 2-1."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 men were being interviewed for a position for the FBI. The interviewers needed to know the men were going to be loyal to the FBI until the very end. So they set up a little test. They put each of the 3 men''s wives in the room. They sent the first man in with a gun, and told him to kill his wife. A few minutes later the man comes out crying. He says, "I just can''t do it. I love her." He gives back the gun. They send the second man in and he comes out crying a few minutes later, hands back the gun, and says, "We''ve had too many good years. I just can''t kill her. I''m sorry." So finally they send in the third applicant. They listen closely to the door and try to see if this man will succeed. They hear a soft click, then a huge commotion. Things were being broken and smashed and a lot of screaming. Coming out tired, the man says to the interviewers, "The damn gun you gave me was loaded with blanks! I had to beat her to death!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do young blondes carry goldfish in their pockets? A. So they can smell like old blondes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed, and driving his partner nuts. Finally, his exasperated partner said, "What''s taking so long? Hit the blasted ball!" The guy answered, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot." "Forget it, man. You don''t stand a chance in hell of hitting her from here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Cajun named Jean Paul moved to Texas and bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. The next day the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry, but I got some bad news. The donkey died." "Well then, just give me my money back." "I can''t do that. I went and spent it already." "OK then, just unload the donkey." "What ya gonna do with em." "I''m gonna raffle him off." "Ya can''t raffle off a dead donkey!" "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won''t tell anyone he''s dead." A month later the farmer met up with the Cajun and asked, "What happened with the dead donkey?" "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at $2 apiece and made a profit of $898." "Didn''t anyone complain?" "Just the guy who won. So I gave him his $2 back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man drives to a gas station and has his tank filled up. The gas-pumper spots two penguins sitting in the back seat of the car. He asks the driver, "What''s up with the penguins in the back seat?" The man in the car says "I found them. I asked myself what to do with them but, I haven''t had a clue." The clerk ponders a bit then says, "You should take them to the zoo." "Hey, that''s a good idea," says the man in the car and drives away. The next day the man with the car is back at the same gas station. The clerk sees the penguins are still in the back seat of the car. "Hey, they''re still here! I thought you were going to take them to the zoo." "Oh, I did," says the driver, "And we had a swell time. Today I am taking them to the beach."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man and a woman were driving and they get into a terrible collision with each other. Both cars are wrecked beyond recognition, but they both crawl out of the wreckage unhurt. The woman says, "In a terrible accident...both of us are alive and, well, this must be a sign from God!" The man agrees. The woman says, "Well, we should celebrate our lives...here, let''s drink to our celebration." She reaches into her wreckage of her car and pulls out a bottle of champagne which miraculously was not broken or even cracked. The man takes a huge gulp of the wine and passes it to the woman who politely waves it away. The man says, "Don''t you want any? It was your idea." The woman says, "No thanks, I''ll wait until the police get here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chucky wanted $100 to buy a remote control car, so he prayed like crazy for two weeks ... but nothing happened. Chucky decided to write God an urgent letter, requesting $100. When the post office received the letter addressed to God, USA, they forwarded the letter to the president. The president was so amused by the letter that he told his secretary to send Chucky a $5 bill, figuring this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. When Chucky received the cash, he was so delighted that he wrote a thank you note which read: Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money. However, I noticed that you sent it through Washington, D.C. Next time, don''t do that because, as usual, those jerks took 95%. Love, Chucky', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very old man and a woman are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. The man starts crying quietly. Touched by the mans sensitive side, she goes over to him, hugs him, and asks him whats the matter. The man says, "Remember when we were 15 and your daddy who was a sheriff caught us? And remember he said I either had to marry you for what we did or I spend 50 years in jail?" The woman nods. The man says, "Well today I could have been a free man."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blonde behind a steering wheel? An Air-Bag', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and has a drink. Then he hears a tiny voice say, "You are so handsome." He looks to see who said that but finds no one. So he drinks again. Then he hears a tiny voice say, "You are so smart and kind." He looks around again and doesn''t find anyone. He asks the bartender whats going on. The bartender says, "O that, that''s the peanuts. They''re complimentary."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 guys die in a car wreck and are sent to heaven. At the gates St. Peter asks the three men what they would want their families to say at the funeral. The first man says, "I want them to say I was an excellent husband and a great police officer." The second man says, "I want them to say I was a great husband, a wonderful teacher and that I made a huge difference in their lives." The third man says, "I wish they would say...LOOK! HE''S MOVING!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyers creed: A man is innocent until proven broke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why does the law prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients? A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for what is essentially the same service.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, in a small town, lived a man named Jack. Everyone in town knew Jack as a very optimistic person. Jack, whenever placed in a terrible situation, would say, "It could have been worse." Everyone in town was tired of hearing Jack say that, so one day they decided to lie to him. They went up to him and said, "Jack, the baker Bob found his wife in bed with another man last night! He shot the man and then himself! Isn''t it terrible?" Then Jack said, "Well, yes it''s terrible, but it could''ve been worse!" The townspeople said, "How could that possibly be worse?" Jack replied, "Well, if it had been the night before I would''ve been dead!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked his doctor if he thought he''d live to be a hundred. The doctor asked the man, "Do you smoke or drink?" "No," he replied. "I''ve never done either." "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or fool around with women?" inquired the doctor. "No, I''ve never done any of those things either." "Well, then," said the doctor, "what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette go parachuting. The blonde jumps first, pulls her parachute cord, and slowly drifts in the air and enjoys the view. The brunette jumps after her and pulls her parachute cord, but nothing happens! She pulls it again, this time as hard as she can, but still nothing. She pulls the cord to the emergency chute, but that doesn''t open either. She passes by the blonde like a speeding bullet! The blonde looks at her and says, while getting her parachute off her shoulders, "So, you want to race, do you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: "My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by his limb." "Well put," the judge replied. "Using your logic, I sentence the defendant''s arm to one year''s imprisonment. He can accompany it or not, as he chooses." The defendant smiled. With his lawyer''s assistance he detached his artificial limb, laid it on the bench, and walked out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded in the desert because their car broke down. The redhead grabs some water, the brunette grabs some food, and the blonde grabs the car door. They began walking, when the redhead turns to the brunette and says," Why did you bring the food?" She replies, " Well in case I get hungry, I can eat it. Why did you bring water?" The redhead replies, " Well in case I get thirsty, I can drink it." Then they both turn to the blonde and say, " Why did you bring the car door?" She replies, " Well in case I get hot, I can roll down the window."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man enters a Lesbian bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while the blind guy yells to the bartender: "Hey, wanna hear a blonde joke?'' A deathly silence transcends the bar. In a deep, husky, menacing voice, the woman next to him says: "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde, and I''m a 6'' tall, 200lb blonde with a black belt in Karate. What''s more, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and she''s a weight lifter. The lady to your right is a blonde and she''s a pro wrestler. Think about it seriously, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?" The blind man pauses to think, and says, "Nah, not if I''m gonna have to explain it five times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Egyptologist sneezed: Hapshepsut!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever notice that "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Take your income and add 10%', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband & wife are talking. Husband: "How many times have you cheated on me?" Wife: "Only twice." Husband: "Tell me about them." Wife: "Remember when you were very sick, and we didn''t have money to pay for the doctor? Well, I slept with him." Husband: "That''s not so bad; and the other?" Wife: "Remember when you were running in the elections, and you needed 450 votes?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a teacher and a train? A train goes "chew, chew, chew," and a teacher says, "Spit that gum out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many FBI agents does it take to change a lightbulb? Shut up! We''ll be asking the questions here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 3. One to change it and the other two to argue whether the lightbulb really exists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We spend the first twelve months of our children''s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up. -Phyllis Diller', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every solution breeds new problems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Join the Marines: Visit exotic places, meet interesting people and then kill them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to the movies one day, and in the front row there''s an old man. With him was his dog. It was a sad, funny kind of film. You know the type. In the sad part the dog cried his eyes out, and in the funny part the dog laughed his head off. This happened all the way through the film. After the film had ended the guy decides to go and speak to the man. "That''s the most amazing thing I''ve ever seen," he said. "Your dog really seemed to enjoy the film." The man turned. "Yeah, it really is amazing, because he hated the book."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new Polish million dollar lotery? You get a dollar a year for a million years!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I married Miss Right. I just didn''t know her first name was Always.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a blonde smile at lightning? She thinks she''s getting her picture taken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. If you are an AMERICAN when you go into the bathroom and you are an AMERICAN when you come out of the bathroom....What are you WHILE you are in the bathroom? A. EUROPEAN... of course!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on an island. One day, the three of them are walking along the beach and discover a magic lamp. They rub and rub, and sure enough, out pops a genie. The genie says, "Since I can only grant three wishes, you may each have one." The brunette says, "I''ve been stuck here for years. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I just want to go home." POOF! The brunette gets her wish and she is returned to her family. Then, the red head says, "I''ve been stuck here for years as well. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I wish I could go home too." POOF! The redhead gets her wish and she is returned to her family. The blonde starts crying uncontrollably. The genie asks, "My dear, what''s the matter?" The blonde whimpers, "I wish my friends were still here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts. A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks, "Ma''am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?" "Why, officer?" asks the blonde. "Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed." "Oh my goodness," exclaims the blonde, "I left my baby on the bus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A busload of politicians were driving down a country road, when suddenly the bus ran off the road and crashed into an old farmer''s barn. The old farmer got off his tractor and went to investigate. Soon he dug a hole and buried the politicians. A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus and asked the old farmer where all the politicians had gone. The old farmer told him he had buried them. The sheriff asked the old farmer, "Lordy, were they ALL dead?" The old farmer said, "Well, some of them said they weren''t, but you know how them crooked politicians lie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did a blonde take an empty glass and a glass full of water to bed? She wasn''t sure if she would get thirsty during the night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde say when you blow in their ear? Thank you for the refill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man dies and goes to hell. When he arrives Satan gives him a choice of what eternal punishment he''ll be given. They go to a wall with 3 doors. Satan opens the first door and there are people standing on their heads on blocks of ice. The man says, "No way, I cant do this punishment." So they move on to the next room. Satan opens the second door and there are people standing on their heads on a brick floor. The man says, "No way, that would give me headaches forever." So they move on to the next room. Satan opens the door and inside there are people sitting in cow manure drinking tea and eating cookies. The man figures it can''t be that bad so he chooses to spend eternity in that room. Just before Satan closes the door he yells back, "Alrite break time is over! Back on your heads!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they only screw the poor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to screw in a lighbulb? None, they just assume they''ve gone blind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk man stumbles into the bar to the only other customer and asks if the man would buy him a drink. The second man says yes. They have a drink, and the first man decides to fill the quiet gap. He asks, "So where you from?" The second man replies, "Ireland." The first man says, "WOW! Me too. Let''s drink to Ireland." They drink and the second man says, "So what part of Ireland ya from?" The first man says, "Dublin. So...what school did you go to?" The second man says, "St. Sebastians. Graduated in 1969." The first man astonished says, "ME TOO! Damn, what a coincidence." Just then a regular comes in the bar and asks the bartender what''s going on. The bartender replies, "Nothin'' much. The O''Malley twins are drunk again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that''s not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral. -- Robert Orben', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a secretary noticed her boss''s fly was open. Not wanting to embarrass him, she whispers in his ear, "Your barracks are open, and your soldier is saluting at the gates." The man, realizing what she means, decides to have some fun and says, "Do you see the colonel standing to attention?" She whispers back, "No; all I see is a veteran sitting on his two duffel bags."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk phones the police. He yells, "Come quick! Thieves have stolen my dashboard, steering wheel, brake and gas pedal, and my dang radio!! MY RADIO!!" The police are just about to send out an officer when the drunk phones back. He says very calmly, "Sorry officers. It turns out I just got in my backseat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is speeding down a deserted street when she is pulled over by a police officer. The officer very politely requests to see the blondes license. The blonde very indignant replies, "You know what? I''m getting tired of you cops. You just can''t make up your mind. Last week you took away my license, and now you want me to show it to you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many telemarketers does it take to change a light bulb? A. Only one, but he has to do it while you''re eating dinner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign seen on a maternity-ward door: Push! Push! Push!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a dry cleaner and a lawyer? A: The cleaner pays if he loses your suit. A lawyer can lose your suit and still take you to the cleaners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After they''d brought their first baby home from the hospital, a young wife suggested to her husband that he try his hand at changing diapers. "I''m busy," he said. "I''ll do the next one." The next time the baby was wet, she asked if he was now ready to learn how to change diapers. He looked puzzled. "Oh," he replied finally. "I didn''t mean the next diaper. I meant the next baby!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tarzan swings through the air Tarzan loses his underwear Tarzan says "Me no care, Jane make me another pair." Boy swings through the air Boy loses his underwear Boy says "Me no care, Jane make me another pair." Cheetah swings through the air Cheetah loses his underwear Cheetah says "Me no care, Jane make me another pair." Jane swings through the air Jane loses her underwear Jane says "Me no care, Tarzan like me better bare!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a farmer who took a young miss Out back of the barn where he gave her a ... Lecture on horses and cattle and eggs And told she had the most wonderful ... Manners that suited a girl of her charms A girl that he wanted to take in his ... Washing and ironing and then if she did They could get married and raise lots of ... Sweet violets, sweeter than all the roses Covered all over from head to toe Covered all over with sweet violets The girl told the farmer that he better quit Then she called her father and he took a ... Taxi and got there before very long ''Cause someone was treating his little girl ... Right for a change and so that''s why he said If you marry my daughter, you''re better off ... Single, for son it has always been my belief That marriage will bring a man nothing but ... Sweet violets, sweeter than all the roses Covered all over from head to toe Covered all over with sweet violets', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you sure you don''t want some Novocain? asked the dentist. "I''m sure," replied the maharishi. "I wish to transcend dental medication."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have a very rare and extremely contagious condition, the doctor told his patient. "We''re going to put you in an isolation unit, where you''ll be on a diet of pancakes and pizza." "Will pancakes and pizza cure my condition?" "No," replied the doctor. "They''re the only things we can slip under the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men were sitting by the swimming pool at a nudist colony when they noticed a beautiful young woman walking towards the pool. Her tan lines traced the outline of a tiny bathing suit with elaborately criss-crossed straps across the back. "I''ll bet she looks great in that suit," one of the men said wistfully.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An RCMP officer pulled over a vehicle that had performed a rolling stop at a stop sign. When the driver was told this, he replied, "But it says STOP, not STAY!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer pulled over a vehicle that had just driven through an intersection without slowing for the traffic light, which flashes red continually. (It flashes amber for the cross direction.) The driver, blonde of course, explained, "But I didn''t go through on the RED, I went through on the BLACK!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seen on a bumper sticker: "I don''t care who''s on board, what you love, who you brake for or what you''d rather be doing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All my life I wanted to be someone; I guess I should have been more specific. -Jane Wagner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world. -Dave Barry', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse a stupid person? Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do blondes hate making Kool-aid? They can''t fit the 8 cups of water in the envelope!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes? Why can''t they make the whole plane out of the same stuff?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat that the last time she saw 90210 is when she stepped on the bathroom scale!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This American is on a business trip to Mexico and has the first day off. He decides he wants to ride a donkey, a traditional Mexican thing. He asks this local man if he can rent a donkey for the day. The man says, "Gringo we call them asses here in Mexico. If you want him to stop though you need to scratch him." The American agrees and pays the Mexican man his money and rides away. The man then decides that he wants something to eat so he rides to a hot dog stand. He asks the man if he can get a hot dog with mustard and relish. The man then replies "Sir, we call them weeners here." The American agrees and hands the man his money. He then sees that his donkey is slowly walking away. So he asks another man standing by him who is also American if he would "hold his weener so he can scratch his ass"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Dolly Parton be a teacher? Because every time she turns around she erases the black board.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why are 1990 American dollar bills worth more than 1989 American dollar bills? A. One thousand nine hundred and ninety dollar bills are worth one dollar more than one thousand nine hundred and eighty-nine dollar bills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunken man was wondering around the parking lot of a bar, bumping into then rubbing the roofs of the cars. The manager comes out of the bar and stops the guy. "What the heck are you doing?" he asks the drunk. "I''m looking for my car, and I can''t find it." he replies. "So how does feeling the roof help you?" asks the puzzled manager. "Well," replies the drunk earnestly, "My car has two blue lights and a siren on the roof!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What''s the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A: A dog only takes a couple of months to train.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To the tune of "I''m Looking Over a Four Leaf Clover": I''m looking over my dead dog Rover That I ran over with the power mower One leg is missing, another is gone The third leg is scattered all over the lawn No need explainin'' the one remainin'' Is under the car port door I''m looking over my dead dog Rover That I overlooked before!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mommy, I hate my sister''s guts! "Shut up and eat what''s put in front of you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Then there was the model who sat on a broken bottle and cut a good figure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She frowned and called him Mr. Because in sport he kr. And so in spite That very night The Mr. kr. sr.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you stand it? the young psychiatrist asked the old psychiatrist. "Day in, day out, year in, year out, listening, listening, listening!" "Who listens?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Then there was the neat nurse, who made the patient without disturbing the bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Then there were the three bears. One married a giraffe. The other two put him up to it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mind Over Matter If you don''t mind, it doesn''t matter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Madame, said the psychiatrist, "you haven''t got a complex; you ARE inferior."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently a guy in Paris nearly got away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre. However, after planning the crime, and getting in and out past incredible security, he was captured only two blocks away when his Econoline ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied: I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The wife ran into the house, screaming to her actor husband, "Darling, come quick. Your kids and my kids are beating up on our kids!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Romans had to give up their big holidays because of the tremendous overhead. The lions ate up all of their prophets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that when we talk to God we call it praying, yet when God talks to us we are schizophrenic? -Lily Tomlin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you see that movie about the pirate? It''s rated Arrr!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, it takes 2 toilets to fit one cheek!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama so fat that she has to wear traintracks for a belt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama so old and fat that she went to see Mt. Rushmore and sang "We Are Family"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama so big that people walk around her for exercise.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Jimmy bit his fingernails all the time. His parents tried everything to get him to stop, but to no avail. Finally, his mother, exasperated, decided to tell him a little white lie to get him to stop. "Jimmy," she said, "You''d better stop biting your fingernails. If you don''t, then those fingernails will pile up inside your stomach and soon your stomach will be huge and full of fingernails." Jimmy, worried about the idea of fingernails in his stomach, agreed to stop. The next day, Jimmy and his mom were shopping in a supermarket. They went to check out, and a pregnant woman was waiting in line in front of them. Jimmy beamed at the pregnant woman and said, "I know what YOU''VE been doing...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Duck #1: Quack Duck #2: Quack Duck #3: Quack Quack Duck #1 takes out a gun and shoots Duck #3. Duck #2: "Why did you shoot him?" Duck #1: "He knew too much."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Little Red Riding Hood was walking in the woods. She put her head between some bushes and suddenly she sees the wolf with his eyes wide open and red. She asks him, "Why are your eyes so big, wolf?" The wolf answers, "Shut up and let me shit in peace!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked, "Is my time up? God said, "No, you have another 43 years, two months and eight days to live." Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction and tummy tuck. Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well look even nicer. After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was hit and killed by an ambulance. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn''t you pull me out of the path of that ambulance?" God replied, "Girl, I didn''t recognize you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Mary short for? For having no legs, of course...If you didn''t have any, you would be short too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, have any of you heard of the kidnapping in the woods? Yeah, well, it all turns out OK, though, since he woke up...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man has returned to his car after coming out of a local shopping centre and notices that his rear bumper is completely bashed in and the back half of his car is severely crushed. He goes to the front to see if there''s any damage there and finds a note on the windshield. Relieved that the other motorist left a note he opens it up and reads it. It says, "Dear Sir or Madam, So very sorry about your car. But you see, I don''t currently have insurance so I can''t afford to pay you for the damages. But a crowd was gathering after I had smashed your car and I had to look like I was writing down my name and phone number. And since I couldn''t do that, I decided to write this instead. Have a nice day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are sitting there enjoying the Saturday night baseball game. It is the top of the 2nd inning when suddenly they notice two Nuns arrive at the game. Lo and behold the Nuns enter the row in front of them and make there way along, of course sitting directly in front of them. Well, their disgust was overwhelming... Nuns... at a baseball match!!! One of them immediately comes out with the comment "Go to a basketball game, ya wouldn''t find Nuns there now would ya!?". A little while on, the other of the two comments "Go to a football game, ya wouldn''t find Nuns there now would ya!?". Again, not more than five minutes later, the first one mentions "Go to a Ice Hockey game, you wouldn''t find Nuns there now would ya!?". Well that was obviously the breaking point and immediately one of the Nuns turned to the two men, bellowing "Go to hell! Ya won''t find Nuns there either!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the doctor and says "Doctor doctor! I can''t eat food through my mouth cause it hurts" The doc says "Try eating through your bum, it might help" A few weeks later the doctor sees the man walking down the road in a very weird way, he asks "Why are you walking like that? Are you hurt?" The man replies "No you fool! I''m chewing a toffie"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In your next life would you rather be a female bear? If you''re a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. Could you deal with that? Before you hibernate, you''re supposed to eat yourself stupid. Could you deal with that too? If you''re a bear, you give birth to your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you''re sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute cuddly cubs. Could you deal with that? If you''re a mumma bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them, too. Could you deal with that? If you''re a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat. Any women out there rather be a bear?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a female brain cell which, by mistake, happened to end up in a man''s head. She looked around nervously, but it was all empty and quiet. "Hello?" she cried...but no answer. "Is there anyone here?" she cried a little louder, but still no answer.... Now the female brain cell started to feel alone and scared and yelled: "HELLO, IS THERE ANYONE HERE?" Then she heard a voice from far, far away ... "Hello - we''re all down here...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, George W. Bush was leaving a very interesting meeting of the United Nations. Once stepping outside, he was met by the Iraqi ambassador, and he started to talk to George. "You know, George, my children are here on this trip with me to the States, and they have gained interest in your television programs. They have especially like the television show Star Trek, although one thing is bothering them about it...The show shows how the races of the Earth can come together in the starship Enterprise, although, they have never seen an Iraqi citizen aboard the ship, and they were just wondering; Why is that?" George chuckles a little and gives him a short answer to his question. "Because it takes place in the FUTURE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat she used Saturn''s rings as hoola-hoops!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are two blondes doing in front of a motorcycle? Arguing about who get a window seat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a smart blond? An Endangered species', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a movie about a man trying to make a blond smart? Mission Impossible', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 99 Blonds on a plane and 1 Brunette. The captain radios in that they are going down, So they drop all the luggage. They were still going down so they drop out all the chairs. They were still going down so they dropped the floor. So they are hanging by their hands from the top on the plane with no floor. So the captain say''s "1 person jump out" the Brunette say''s "I''ll sacrifice my life", and all the Blonds start clapping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do blondes climb chain-link fences? To see what''s on the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a blond wear a tight skirt? To keep her legs closed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is more stupid then a brunette trying to start a fire in a pool? A blonde trying to put it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an intelligent blonde? A Golden Retriever', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is on the road when suddenly she gets a phonecall from her friend: "Watch out! I heard on the radio that some lunatic is going against traffic!" So the blonde says, "Only one? They all are!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Dyslexics does it take to change a Lit Blub?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anyone remember Roy Clark, host of TV''s "Hee Haw"? Once, cohost Buck Owens was visiting Roy''s home in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. Roy was upset because he had just bought a beautiful new pair of genuine leather boots that were completely destroyed by a mountain lion the night before when Roy had left them on the back porch. Roy was bound and determined to get the animal, so he and Buck, and several townspeople, took up arms and searched the hills. The group searched for hours to no avail. Then suddenly, Buck heard a feline wail. Buck turns to his friend and sings: "Pardon me Roy, is that the cat that chewed your new shoes?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do ducks have webbed feet? To stamp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was unveiled by scientists as "The Funniest Joke in the World": Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn''t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let''s make sure he''s dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and her young son returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. The boy opened the box of animal crackers and spread them all over the table. "What are you doin?" his mother asked; "you can''t eat them if the seal is broken." The boy explained, "I''m looking for the seal."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A waiter asks a man, "May I take your order, sir?" "Yes," the man replies. "I''m just wondering, exactly how do you prepare your chickens?" "Nothing special, sir. We just tell them straight out that they''re going to die."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat, she coughed next to a corn field and made popcorn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between men and women? Women zoom with a camera by walking closer or farther away; men just push the button!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Likes people that oppress him: teachers, parents, principals, police, and authority figures. 9. Is overly enthusiastic about ''Dungeons and Dragons'' and other role playing games. 8. Very familiar with megahertz, wears glasses and, can quote scripture. 7. Frequently speaks of martial arts, but still gets beaten up. 6. Says ''Whom'' instead of ''Who.'' 5. Is pleased when disruptive individuals are sent to the office, so that they can continue with their learning. 4. Prefers NPR to any music. 3. Gets upset when there is a test or quiz that he did not know about. 2. Rooted for Deep-Blue in the famous chess game. 1. Must be pulled off bridge when not accepted at the college of his choice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three couples went to a resturant. The women wanted to compliment the men with something that was on the table. "Could you pass me the sugar, sugar?" said the first gal. "Could you pass me the honey, honey?" said the second. "Could you pass me the bacon, pig?" said the third.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: "Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man." The man then replies: "Yeah, well we were married 35 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 degrees Celsius. The Russians used a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That''s the ugliest baby that I''ve ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off; go ahead, I''ll hold your monkey for you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the wall say to the picture? How''s it hangin`?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wilfred had just learned his abc''s and was very scared of doing them in front of the class. The teacher, though, told him that the best way to conquer his fears would be to just go ahead and do it. So, trembling, he stood in front of the class and began. "ABCDEFGHIJLKMNOQRSTUVWXYZ." "Very good, Wilfred. But you forgot the P. Where''s the P? "It''s running down my leg."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wonder who came up with the company People''s Gas and where was their Pepto-Bismal?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are so stupid you tripped over a cordless phone! You are so stupid you got locked in a furniture store and sat on the floor! You are so stupid you didn''t know how to swim so you got in the fish tank to try and learn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when the smog clears over southern California? UCLA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mama Skunk had two children named In and Out. The two were always on the go, but rarely in one place at the same time. Whenever In was in, Out was out. Whenever In was out, Out was in. One day at dinner time, Out was home, but In was no where to be seen. Mama Skunk sent Out out to bring In in for dinner. Out quickly returned with In and Mama was amazed. "However did you find In so quickly in all the vast forest?" asked Mama. "Easy," said Out. "Instinct!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was enjoying a pleasant afternoon of golf. On the 15th hole, he drove his ball to the right of the fairway into a patch of buttercups. As he neared the ball, he heard a small voice say, "Please sir, don''t hurt my buttercups!." He looked around, but there was no one nearby. So he starts towards his ball again and hears, "Please sir, don''t hurt my buttercups!" Well, the man is a little disturbed by this, so he decides to leave that ball and play another, even though this will cost him a stroke. After he makes his play, an elf appears! "Thank you, sir, for not hurting my buttercups. As a reward, I will give you all the butter you could ever want." "Well, that''s great," replied the man, "but where were you when I was in the pussy willows?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thought I was stupid, Then I met you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man#1 is mowing his lawn when 2 hearses come down his street going very very slowly. The hearses are followed by a man walking a dog. And behind the man and the dog is a line of men walking single-file. There must have been 5 or 6 dozen men following. Curious about the procession Man#1 runs to catch up with Man#2 and his dog. Man#1 asks Man#2 who''s in the first hearse. Man#2 replies, "My wife. My dog bit her. And she died in the hospital a bit later." Man#1 says, "I''m so very sorry for your loss. Mind if I ask who''s in the second hearse?" Man#2 says, "Not at all, it''s my mother in law. My dog also bit her and she died later in the hospital." Man#1 replies, "Can I borrow your dog?" Man#2, "Get in line."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know a blonde is having a bad day? Her tampon is behind her ear, and she''s looking for her pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The crime boss and his attorney meet with his accountant. "Where''s the $3 million you embezzled from me?" demands the gangster. The accountant is silent. "Where''s my $3 million?" the crime boss shouts. The lawyer explains: "Sir, the man is deaf. Allow me to translate." Using sign language, the attorney asks the accountant about the money; the message relayed back is that the accountant knows nothing about it. Furious, the crime boss pulls out a revolver and puts it to the accountant''s head, screaming at the lawyer, "Ask him again where my %#*!@#&*# money is!" "Okay! Okay!" the deaf accountant signs back. "The money''s hidden behind the old toolshed in my backyard." "What did he say?" demands the enraged crime boss. The attorney replies, "He says you don''t have the guts to pull the trigger."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1960''s arithmetic test: A logger cuts and sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is four fifths of that amount. What is his profit? 1970''s new-math test: A logger exchanges a set (L) of lumber for a set (M) of money. The cardinality of set M is 100. The set C of production costs contains 20 fewer points. What is the cardinality of set P of profits? 1980''s "dumbed down" version: A logger cuts and sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost is $80, his profit is $20. Find and circle the number 20. 1990''s version: An unenlightened logger cuts down a beautiful stand of 100 trees in order to make a $20 profit. Write an essay explaining how you feel about this as a way to make money. Topic for discussion: How did the forest birds and squirrels feel?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I make money the old-fashioned way. My salary is the same as it was ten years ago.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My husband won a trip for two to Hawaii, a woman complained to her marriage counsellor. "He went twice!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack tells his shrink, "Last night I dreamed you were my mother." "How did you feel about it after you woke up?" asks the psychiatrist. "I overslept," answers Jack. "Then I remembered I had an appointment with you, so I grabbed a Coke and some cookies for breakfast and came right over. I didn''t really have time to think about it. What does it mean, doc?" "A Coke and some cookies?" says the psychiatrist. "You call that breakfast?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NAMES OF ACTUAL COUPLES GETTING MARRIED: Broken-Bridge Sarry-Huney Big-Theisman Lossin-Hare Redder-Bottum CAN''T WAIT TO SEE HOW LONG THOSE COUPLES LAST!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Actual Newspaper Headline: Kids Make Great Snacks For Teachers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an examination to determine the cause of her daughter''s swollen abdomen. It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say "Gimmee a break lady! Your daughter is pregnant." The mother turned red with fury and she argued with the doctor that her daughter was a good girl and would never compromise her reputation by having sex with a boy. The doctor faced the window and silently watched the horizon. The mother became enraged an screamed, "Quit looking out the window! Aren''t you paying attention to me?" "Yes, of course I am paying attention ma''am. It''s just that the last time this happened, a star appeared in the east, and three wise men came. I was hoping they would show up again and help me figure out who got your daughter pregnant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following ad is reported to have gotten numerous calls: SINGLE BLACK FEMALE... Seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant.. I''m a svelte good looking girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pickup truck, hunting, camping, and fishing trips, cozy winter nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. Rub me the right way and watch me respond. I''ll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Kiss me and I''m yours. Call xxx-xxxx and ask for Daisy." Callers found themselves talking to the local Humane Society about an eight-week-old black Labrador Retriever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tonto and the Lone Ranger were lost on the prairie one day. The Lone Ranger says to Tonto, "Use your Indian instincts and get us out of this mess." Tonto bends down and puts his ear to the ground. He turns and says to the Lone Ranger, "Buffalo come." The Lone Ranger says to Tonto, "How do you know?" Tonto says, "Ear sticky."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t blind people sky dive? Because it scares the crap outta the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Constipated Mathematicians do? Work it out with a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly not even the tide would take her out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man visiting a graveyard saw a tombstone that read, "Here lies John Kelly, a lawyer and an honest man." "Well, how about that!" he exclaimed. "They''ve got three people buried in one grave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overheard in a doctor''s waiting room: "My uncle had a cough like yours and he died. Mind you, he was hiding under his neighbour''s bed at the time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the scientist who crossed a carrier pigeon with a woodpecker? He got a bird that not only delivers messages to their destination but knocks on the door when it gets there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Zen Buddhist say to the New York hot-dog vendor? "Make me one with everything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mother to teenage daughter: "The bad news is, we''re moving to a different city. The good news is, your new school is full of boys who didn''t see you get sick in the cafeteria last month."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pride is what you feel when your kids net $143 from a garage sale. Panic is what you feel when you realize your car is missing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest was walking down the street when he saw a little boy jumping up and down to try to reach a doorbell. So the priest walked over and pressed the button for the youngster. "And now what, my little man?" he asked. "Now," said the boy, "run like hell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning, as was his custom, the pastor of a small church had all the children come up front for a brief children''s church. He enjoyed asking the children various questions, and hearing their answers. On this particular morning, he noticed little Susie feeling a bit shy, so he leans over to her and says, "Susie, that''s certainly a lovely dress you''re wearing!" Little Susie then leans over and says right into the pastor''s lapel mic, "yes, and my mommy says its a bitch to iron".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You hear crack is illegal and you pull up your pants. Someone yells "Hoe Down" at a dance and your wife falls to the floor. You use newspapers for more than 3 uses in your home. Your family tree is a wreath. If your home is mobile but the 4 cars in your yard are not. Your father gave you this advice, "If you can''t keep it in your pants, at least keep it in the family." The last thing relatives say before they die is, "Hey Ya''ll! Watch this!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk stumbles into a confessional. The priest on the other side hears someone enter but yet the man does not speak. So the priest knocks on the wall of the confessional and hears the drunk say, "Forget it buddy, theres no toiletpaper in this one either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For Gods sakes Bill! Help her find it!. ~Hillary after walking in with Monica on her hands and knees in front of Bill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy took his blonde girlfriend to a football game for the first time. After the game he asked his girlfriend how she liked the game. "Oh, I really liked it," she said, "but I just couldn''t understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents." What on earth do you mean???" Well, I saw them flip a coin and one team got it and then for the rest of the game all they kept screaming was: "Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young child walks into a corner store and picks up a big box of laundry detergent. The storekeep trying to be friendly says, "Got a lot of laundry to do?" The boy says, "Haha no. I''m actually going to go wash my dog with it." The storekeep says, "Son, that stuff is very powerful. If you use it to wash your dog the dog might become sick or even die!" The boy replies, "Don''t worry, he''ll be fine." And the boy leaves. The next day the boy returns to buy some candy. The storekeep asks the boy about his dog and how the washing went. The boy replies sadly, "He died..." The storekeep says as gently as he can, "I''m sorry son. But I warned you this might happen if you wash the dog with detergent." The boy replies, "I don''t think it was the laundry detergent that killed him. I think it was the spin cycle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked people for fifty-thousand dollars for his talking dog. He brings him into the bar, but the bartender doesn''t believe the dog can talk so the guy asks the dog, "What''s the opposite of smooth?" The dog says, "Rough." And then the guy asks the dog, "What''s the part of the house that has the chimney sticking out of it?" "Roof." "And who was the great homerun hitter in the twenties and thirties?" "Ruth!" The bartender says, "You big fake, get that dog out of here." So the guy and his dog go outside. Then the dog says, "What was I supposed to say? Mel Ott?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don''t know, it has never happened.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 old ladies are at the bus stop waiting for a bus when it starts to rain. Not wanting to lose her cigarette, one of the old ladies took a condom and a pair of scissors out of her purse, snipped off the end of the condom and slid it over her cigarette. The 2nd lady noticed this and thought it was a brilliant idea, so the next day she goes to the pharmacy and asks for a pack of condoms. The man says, "Sure, what size would you like?" The woman, thinking about her cigarettes, says, "One that will fit a Camel."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seeing her son is still in bed, Mary goes to wake him up for school. When she wakes him up he says, "But I don''t want to go to school mom." Mary quite annoyed at this childlike behaviour says, "Well why not? You have to go." The son replies, "But I don''t like it. The kids are mean to me, the teachers hate me, and everyone makes fun of me." Mary calmly replies, "I''m sorry son. But you MUST go to school!." The son says, "But whyyyy?" Mary annoyed at the delay says, "Because you''re the damn principal!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With the daily time taken working on computers, avoiding things like RSI and any strain related illnesses is crucial to maintaining a healthy working environment. The following excercise has been devised by medical experts in the field of RSI research to ensure that if performed, will place the exerciser in a position of minimal risk. Simply follow the on-screen instructions. Scroll down. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Scroll Up', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?" She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won''t sleep with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table. After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I''m sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I''m a graduate student in psychology and I''m studying how people respond to embarrassing situations." To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean, $200?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the definition of Endless Love? Stevie Wonder playing Ray Charles at Tennis! Endless Love!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The eight Saddam body doubles are gathered in one of the bunkers in downtown Baghdad. Tariq Aziz, the deputy prime minister, comes in and says, ''I have some good news and some bad news.'' They ask for the good news first. Aziz says, ''The good news is that Saddam is still alive, so you all still have jobs.'' ''And the bad news?'' they ask. Aziz replies, ''He''s lost an arm''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man has just been in a car accident and has severe brain damage. So his sister is called in to take care of his medical decisions. First off, the doctor decides the man needs a new brain since his is so badly damaged. So they need to go find a brain for the transplant. They go down to the basement where all the brains are and there are 3 jars. The doctor points to the first jar and says, "That brain belonged to a woman. It will cost your brother $20 a gram." The doctor then points to the second jar, "That will cost you $40 a gram. It once belonged to one of our female doctors and she was quite a brilliant person." The doctor then points to the third jar and says, "That is a brain that once belonged to a man. It costs $200 a gram." The sister replies, "Why is the male brain so much more expensive?" The doctor replies, "Are you joking!? Do you know how hard it is to find a gram of a male''s brain??"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A highway patrolman pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway. As the officer peered through the driver''s window, he was astounded to find that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting. The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "Pull over!" at the top of his lungs. "No!" the blonde yelled back, "Scarf!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man hadn''t been feeling well, so he went to his doctor for a complete check-up. Afterward, the doctor came out with the results. "I''m afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor said, "you''re dying, and you don''t have much time left." "Oh, that''s terrible!" said the man. "How long have I got?" "Ten," the doctor said sadly. "Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!" The doctor interrupted, "Nine..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says "I''m sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, ''Guess who?''" "But why?" asks the man. "I''m a divorce lawyer," the man replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor vacationing on the Riviera met an old lawyer friend and asked him what he was doing there. The lawyer replied, "Remember that lousy real estate I bought? Well, it caught fire, so here I am with the fire insurance proceeds. What are you doing here?" The doctor replied, "Remember that lousy real estate I had in Mississippi? Well, the river overflowed, and here I am with the flood insurance proceeds." The lawyer looked puzzled. "Gee," he asked, "how did you start the flood?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy phones a law firm and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer." The receptionist says, "I''m sorry, but your lawyer died last week." The next day the same guy phones the law firm and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer." Once again the receptionist replies, "I''m sorry, but your lawyer died last week." The next day the guy makes his regular call to the law firm and says, "I want to speak to my lawyer." "Excuse me sir," the receptionist says, "but this is third time I''ve had to tell you that your lawyer died last week. Why do you keep calling?" The guy replies, "Because I love hearing it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Marine was coming home from the Pentagon one day. He noticed that there was a lot more traffic than normal. As he got further up the road all of the traffic had come to a halt. He saw a policeman coming towards his car, so he asked the cop what was wrong. The cop said, "Man we are in a crisis situation. Mr. Clinton is in the road very upset. He does not have the $33.5 million that he owes his lawyers, and his family hates him. He is threatening to douse himself in gasoline and start a fire." The marine asked the cop exactly what he was doing there. The cop said, "I feel sorry for the president so I am going car to car asking for donations." The marine asked, "How much do you have so far?" The cop replied, "Well as of right now only 33 gallons, but many people are still siphoning as we speak!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning, the priest noticed Little Johnny was staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. It was covered with names, and small American flags were mounted on either side of it. The seven-year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the priest walked up, stood beside the boy, and said quietly, "Good morning, Little Johnny." "Good morning, Father," replied the young man, still focused on the plaque. "Father Scott, what is this?" Little Johnny asked. "Well, son, it''s a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service." Soberly, they stood together, staring at the large plaque. Little Johnny''s voice was barely audible when he asked, "Which service, the 9:45 or the 11:15?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich lonely widow decided that she needed another man in her life so she placed an ad, which read this: RICH WIDOW LOOKING FOR MAN TO SHARE LIFE AND FORTUNE ...NEEDS TO HAVE THESE QUALIFICATIONS: 1) WON''T BEAT ME UP 2) WON''T RUN AWAY 3) HAS TO BE GREAT IN BED For several months, her phone rang off the hook, her doorbell was ringing constantly, she received tons of mail, etc., all to no avail: none seemed to match her qualifications. Then one day the doorbell rang yet again. She opened the door to find a man with no arms and no legs lying on the welcome mat. Perplexed, she asked, "Who are you? And what do you want?" "Hi," he said, "your search is over, for I''m the man of your dreams. I''ve got no arms so I can''t beat you up and no legs so I can''t run away." "Well, then," she said, "what makes you think that you''re so great in bed?" To which he replied - "Well, I rang the doorbell, didn''t I?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat when she steps on a scale, it reads "one at a time, please"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Contrary to popular opinion, life is NOT a bi**h. Life is a virgin. A bi**h would be easy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? You can''t hear an enzyme!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A decrepit old gas man named Peter While hunting around for the meter His torch he did light He arose out of sight And, of course, as a result, he totally, completely and utterly destroyed the meter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where do cows go on Saturday nights? A: To the moovies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s a little known fact that William Tell and his son were avid bowlers as well as archery buffs. Unfortunately, all the league records were destroyed in a fire, so it may never be known for whom the Tells bowled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently went to my 30th class reunion from nursery school. I didn''t want to go because I''ve put on maybe 90 or 100 pounds since then.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wealthy man came home from a gambling trip and told his wife that he had lost their entire fortune and that they''d have to drastically alter their life-style. "If you''ll just learn to cook," he said, "we can fire the chef." "Okay," she said. "And if you learn how to make love, we can fire the gardener."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear goes into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender replies, "Sorry we dont serve bears here." The bear, upset, says angrily, "Gimme a beer or I''ll eat that lady over there!" The bartender says, "Go ahead, I don''t care." The bear goes and savagely mauls the woman then eats her in front of the bartender. The bear goes and says, "Now give me a beer or I''ll eat someone else." The bartender says, "I''m sorry we don''t serve bears on drugs in here." The bear goes, "What? I''m not on drugs!" The bartender says, "What about the barbituate?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was walking past a schoolyard during recess when she saw a young girl standing all alone on one end of the soccer field, while the other children all played a game of soccer. Feeling sorry for the poor child, she went up to the girl and made small talk. She asked the little girl if she was OK. The little girl replied she was fine. The blonde then said, "Why don''t you go play with the other children?" The little girl replied, "I already am." The blonde, a bit annoyed said, "What do you mean, you already am?" The girl replied, "I am playing." The blonde, thinking the girl was lying so she wouldnt be embarassed, said, "Wanna be friends?" The girl hesitated, then reluctantly said Sure. The blonde, feeling she made progress, says, "Would you like to go play in the sandbox?" The girl replies, "Sure... after I''m done playing soccer. I''m the goalie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you trust a blonde to call for an ambulance? She can''t find the 11 to call 911.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so bald when she wears a turtleneck she looks like a broken condom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat when she stepped on my dog''s tail I had to change his name to "Beaver."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde call the welfare office? She wanted to know how you cook food stamps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The amount of sleep required by the average person is about five minutes more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They say one way to build character is to do things you don''t want to do. Every day I do two things I don''t want to do: I get out of bed in the morning and go to bed at night!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money. -- Jackie Mason', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The perfect climate is in bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an oxymoron? A: A smart blonde!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wanna hear a dirty joke? A boy fell in a mud puddle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor came to a sanitarium to check up on the patients. He sees that everybody is walking around with an empty leash. So he asks a few patients what they are doing. They all answered that they are taking their dog out on a walk. Only one of the patients said "What are you, blind? I''m holding an empty leash!" So the doctor says "Very good, I see you are not as crazy as everyone else." When the doctor leaves, the patient says, "Did you see how we fooled him, Sparky?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor goes into a sanitarium one day to check up on the patients. He sees they are all lined up with bathing suits on, jumping into the air and landing hard on the floor. He asks them what they are doing, and they all answer "We''re diving into the pool". Only one of them sits aside watching them. "I see you''re not diving into the pool" the doctor says. The patient replies "I''m the lifeguard."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you breed a blonde and a New York gangster? A juvenile deliquent who spray paints chain link fences.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A poor Jamaican fisherman was shipwrecked on a desert island. He had lost his boat, his livelihood and possessions. He was trudging round the island in a dejected mood when he came across an old brass lamp washed up on the beach. Remembering the tale of Aladdin (and the role of magic lamps in jokes) he rubbed it. POOF! A Genie appeared. A Jewish Genie. "Vey!" he said. "Am I glad to be outta there. Three hundred years I bin in that thing, my life and soul! What can I do for you my boy?" The Jamaican asked if the Genie granted wishes. "Wishes, Schmishes! Course I do. I''ll grant you two wishes, used to be three but I gotta think about my margins." "Well," said the Jamaican after some consideration "I''d like to be white and surrounded by women." "No problem" said the Genie. POOF! - the Jamaican was transformed into a tampon. Moral: Never do business with a Jewish Genie - there''s always a string attached', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CLASSIC QUOTE: A quote from Sky News "Umm Qasr is a city similar to Southampton," UK defence minister Geoff Hoon said in the Commons yesterday. "He''s either never been to Southampton, or he''s never been to Umm Qasr," says a British squaddie patrolling Umm Qasr. Another soldier added: "There''s no beer, no prostitutes and people are shooting at us. It''s more like Portsmouth."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married couple are driving along when they see a wounded skunk on the side of the road. They stop, the wife gets out, picks it up, and brings it into the car. She says, "Look, it''s shivering, it must be cold. What should I do?" Her husband replies, "Put it between your legs to keep it warm." She asks, "What about the smell?" He says, "Hold its nose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy with a black eye boards his plane and sits down in his seat. He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye, too. He says to him, "Hey this is a coincidence, we both have black eyes; mind if I ask how you got yours?" The other guy says, "Well, it just happened. It was a tongue twister accident. See, I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with the most massive breasts in the world was there. So, instead of saying, I''d like two tickets to Pittsburgh,'' I accidentally said, I''d like two pickets to Tittsburgh''........... So she socked me a good one. The first guy replied, "Wow! This is unbelievable. Mine was a tongue twister too. I was at the breakfast table this morning and I wanted to say to my wife, ''Please pour me a bowl of Frosties, honey.'' But I accidentally said, ''You ruined my life you evil fat slag.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment, they both manage to get to sleep, the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower. In the middle of the night, the woman leans over and says, "I''m sorry to bother you, but I''m awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly pass me another blanket." The man leans out and, with a glint in his eye, says, "I''ve got a better idea.....let''s pretend we''re married." "Why not?" giggles the woman. "Good," he replies. "Get your own f***ing blanket."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. "What are you doing?" She asked. "Hunting Flies" He responded. "Oh!, Killing any?" She asked. "Yep, 3 males, 2 Females", he replied. Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell?" "3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I take a long time, I am slow. When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough. When I don''t do it, I am lazy. When my boss doesn''t do it, he''s too busy. When I do it without being told, I''m trying to be smart. When my boss does the same, that is initiative. When I please my boss, that''s brown-nosing. When my boss pleases his boss, that''s co-operating. When I do good, my boss never remembers. When I do wrong, he never forgets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative." A voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup du jour, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "what is this?" "Why, it''s bean soup," she replied. "I don''t care what it has been," he sputtered. "What is it now?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so skinny she had to run arround the shower to get wet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To make a long story short, well, it helps if the boss walks in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I put a blank tape in my TV and turned the volume all the way up. The mime next door went crazy and called the cops.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grow some dope... plant a man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A really really drunk man stumbled out of a local bar and right into the nun. Quickly the man punched the nun right in the face. Stunned the nun tried to run away, but the drunk just ran after her and pushed her to the ground. The drunk then proceeded to kick the nun repeatedly until the nun was begging for mercy. The drunk leans down and looks at the nun and says, "Not so tough now, eh Batman?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two robins were sitting in a tree. "I''m really hungry," said the first one. "Let''s fly down and find some lunch." They flew down to the ground and found a nice plot of newly plowed ground that was full of worms. They ate and ate and ate till they could eat no more. "I''m so full, I don''t think I can fly back up into the tree," said the first one. "Let''s just lay back here and bask in the warm sun," said the second. "OK," said the first. So they plopped down, basking in the sun. No sooner than they had fallen asleep, when a big fat tomcat came by and gobbled them up. As the cat sat washing his face after his meal, he thought... "I JUST LOVE BASKIN ROBINS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Hillary are at the first baseball game of the season. The umpire walks up to the VIP section and yells something, suddenly Clinton grabs Hillary by the collar and throws her over the side and onto the field. The stunned umpired shouts. "No, Mr. President! I said, ''Throw the first PITCH!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An 8-year-old girl went to her dad, who was working in the yard. She asked him, "Daddy, what is sex?" The father was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decides that if she is old enough to ask the question, then she is old enough to get a straight answer. He proceeded to tell her all about the "birds and the bees." When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open. The father asked her, "Why did you ask this question?" The little girl replied, "Mom told me to tell you that dinner would be ready in just a couple of secs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reaching the end of a job interview, the interviewer asked a young engineer, "What starting salary were you thinking about?" The Engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5 weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?" The interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Vampire bats are in a cave, both very hungry. The first bat goes out looking for some food. He comes back later with nothing. The second bat tries not long afterwords. 5 minutes later he returns, blood all over his face! "Wow!" said the first bat "You must''ve had a big meal, where did you get that?" "Well, can you see that large redwood over there?" "Yes" replies the first bat. "Well I bloody well didn''t."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('alarm clock, n. a device for waking up people who don''t have small children', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Penguins mate for life. This is not surprising, as they all look the same. It''s not like they have to wait and wonder if someone better will come along!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eve, in the Garden of Eden, called out, "Lord, I have a problem." And the Lord said, "What''s the matter, Eve?" "I know You created me and this beautiful garden. But I''m lonely - and I''m sick of eating apples." "Well, in that case," replied the Almighty, "I''ll create a man for you." "What''s a man?" "He''s a flawed creature with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to listen. But he''s big and fast and muscular. He''ll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball and hunting animals." "Sounds great!" replied Eve. "There''s one condition," added the Lord. "You''ll have to let him believe that I made him first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the director of the Department of Motor Vehicles who resigned on Tuesday? He tried to resign on Monday, but discovered he''d been standing in the wrong line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the scientists who crossed a porcupine with a sheep? They got an animal that knits its own sweaters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The assistant curator of the musuem came to the head curator with a couple of problems. "Sir, the mummy is damp and getting mouldy. And the white mouse in the maze exhibit has developed dry skin." The head curator thought for a minute, then advised, "Put your mummy where your mouse is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so dumb, she tried to spell out the alphabet with M&M''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What possible reason can you have for acquitting this defendant? the judge shouted at the jury. "Insanity, Your Honour," replied the foreman. "All TWELVE of you?" bellowed the judge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please, God, the man prayed, "you know me. I''m always praying to you, yet I''ve had nothing but bad luck, misery and despair. Look at the butcher next door. He''s never prayed in his life, and he enjoys prosperity, health and happiness. How come a believer like me is always in trouble, and he''s always doing so well?" "Because," a voice boomed from the heavens, "the butcher doesn''t bug me, that''s why!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Opera: where somebody gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, sings.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Couple of things you oughta know Firstly, when I''m born, I''m black!! When I grow up, I''m black When I get sick, I''m black When I go out in the sun, I''m black When I''m cold, I''m black And when I get scared, Gee, I''m black And When I die, I''m still black But you white fella... When you born, you pink When you grow up, you white When you get sick, you green When you go out in the sun, you red When you get cold, you go blue When you get scared, you yellow And when you die, you purple And YOU got the cheek to call ME coloured??!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Eskimos sitting in their boat were chilly; but when they lit a fire in the boat, it sank, proving once and for all that you can''t have your kayak and heat it too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman had twins, and gave them up for adoption. One of them went to a family in Egypt and was named Amal. The other went to a family in Spain, and they named him Juan. Years later, Juan sent a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she told her husband that she wished that she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responded, "But they''re twins. If you''ve seen Juan, you''ve seen Amal."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama was so Ugly as a child your granddaddy had to put a pork chop round her neck so the dog would play with her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What two things in the air can make a blonde pregnant? Her Legs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was sitting outside a church playing with sulphuric acid. The priest came up to him and said "Child why are you playing with sulphuric acid? Thats dangerous! I''ve got some holy water inside that is much more powerful." Little Johnny relied "How come?" "Well last week I splashed some holy water on Mrs.Wilson''s tummy and she passed a baby!" said the priest proudly. "Thats nothing," retorted Little Johnny "I spashed some sulphuric acid on my dog''s balls and he passed a Ferrari!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a good egg and a good fart? You can''t beat a good fart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blind Hookers eh? You''ve got to hand it to them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a women are making love for the first time. "Cor what a small organ!" the women sniggered "It may be small, darling" replied the man "but it''s never played in a Cathedral before!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to open a beer? None it should be open by the time she brings it to you. Why are women''s feet so small? So they can stand closer to the sink. How much does it cost to fix a woman''s watch? Nothing, theres a clock on the oven. Your wife is at the front door yelling at you to open the door for her and your dog is at the back door barking his head off to be let in. Which one do you let in first? The dog, he shuts up when you let him in the house. What''s worse than a Male Chauvinist? A woman who won''t shut up and do what a man tells her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four Catholic women are sitting in a cafe sipping their tea, talking about their great sons. Soon it begins as a contest to see who has the best son. The first woman proudly declares, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room people call him ''Father." The second woman replies even more proudly, "My son is a bishop, when he walks into a room people call him ''My Grace." The third woman thinking she wins replies, "My son is a Cardinal! When he walks into a room people say, ''My Eminence." The fourth woman says nothing but sips her tea quietly. The three women stare at her and then ask her what is so special about her son. With a smug look on her face she replies, "My son is a 6'' 5" muscular man, with a chiseled jaw and arms as big as pipes. And when he walks into a room all the woman say, ''Oh My God."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman''s breasts are like a child''s toys. They are meant for the child - but the husband is the one that usually ends up playing with them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three vampires go into a bar. The bartender asks the first one, "What can I getcha?" The first vampire replies, "I''ll have a pint of blood". The bartender then asks the second vampire, and he too orders a pint of blood. The bartender turns to the third vampire and asks, "What about you?" The third vampire says, "I think I''ll have a pint of plasma." The bartender says, "OK, so that will be two Bloods and one Blood Lite."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three well known rings to marriage: Engagement ring, Wedding ring, and suffering!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s like Humpty Dumpty.... first she gets humped, then she gets dumped!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you don''t like my driving, stay out of the bus shelters!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overheard at an exhibit in the science museum: "It says here that oxygen was discovered over two hundred years ago." "Wow! What did people breathe before that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and son were washing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the family room. Suddenly, there was a crash of breaking dishes, then complete silence. The girl looked at her dad and said, "It was Mom." "How do you know?" "She didn''t say anything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From the instruction manual for the first stewardesses (in 1930): Keep the clock and altimeter wound up. Carry a railroad timetable in case the plane is grounded. Warn the passengers against throwing their cigars and cigarettes out the windows. Keep an eye on passengers when they go to the lavatory to be sure they don''t mistakenly go out the emergency exit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two guys at a bar. One of them was rich and the other was poor. They both start talking and they find out their anniversary is on the same day, which is tomorrow. Poor guy- "What did you get your wife?" Rich Guy- "I got her a diamond ring and a Mercedes Benz." Poor guy- "Why did you give her those??" Rich Guy- "Because if she doesn''t like the ring she can run the car off a cliff and go screw herself. What did you get your wife?" Poor guy- "A pair of slippers and a dildo" Rich Guy- "Why did you give her those??" Poor guy- "Because if she doesn''t like the slippers she can go screw herself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? Through a catalogue!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the woman who poured margaritas in her birdbath? Enough tequila mockingbird.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a stockbroker''s office and said to the receptionist, "I just won the lottery, and I want to open an account with your %**!&%*! company." Heads turned in shock at hearing the man''s language. "I''m sorry, but we don''t allow that kind of talk here," the receptionist said. "You''ll have to leave." "I told you I want to open an account with this %**!&%*! company," the man insisted. Suddenly the manager came out. "What''s all the swearing about?" he asked. "I just won $12 million and I want to open an account with your %**!&%*! company," the man replied. "Oh, I see," said the manager. "And are these %**!&%*! people giving you a hard time?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Chips. Chips who? Chips Ahoy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb, she spent twenty minutes staring at a orange juice bottle because it said, ''Concentrate''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you kill a blond? A. Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when she got on the scale it said To be Continued!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so dirty she has to sneak up on the water', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma such a bitch, PMS cheers her up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale she screwed it to the bottom of the floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new dictionary for masochists? It has all the words, but they''re not in alphabetical order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tearful woman phoned a reducing salon to wail that her husband had just given her a lovely present and she couldn''t get into it. The operator gave her an appointment and added, "Don''t worry, madam, we''ll have you wearing that dress in no time." "Dress?" the matron sobbed. "It''s a Porsche!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never ever take a sleeping pill and a laxative in the same night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender tells him the price is $3. The man pulls out a $20 bill and hands it to the bartender. The bartender replies, "Sorry I can''t accept that." The man then pulls out a $10 bill and hands it to the bartender. The bartender refuses to accept it. The man finally pulls out a $5 bill and gives it to the bartender. The bartender once again refuses to accept it. When the man asks the bartender why he won''t accept any of the bills the man is giving him, the bartender replies, "Sorry sir, this is a singles bar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar down in Alabama and orders a beer. The whole bar is looking at the man curiously as he sits down. The bartender looks at his nice suit and tie and asks him if he''s from around here. The man replies, "No sir, I''m from Pennslyvania." The bartender asks the man what he does for a living up in Pennyslyvania. The man replies, "I am a Taxidermist." The bartender slowly asks, "What is a Taxidermist?" The man answers back, "Oh, I just mount animals." The bartender grins wide and yells to the whole bar, "It''s OK Boys!! He''s one of us!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d had a pretty hectic day with my four-year-old. When bed-time finally came, I laid down the law: "We''re putting on your p.j.s, brushing your teeth, and reading ONE book. Then it''s lights out!" Her arms went around my neck in a gentle embrace, and she said, "We learned in Sunday school about little boys and girls who don''t have mommies and daddies." Even after I''d been such a grouch, I thought, she was still grateful to have me. I felt tears begin to well up in my eyes, and then she whispered, "Maybe you could go be THEIR mom?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, I''d like you to evaluate my 13 year-old son. "OK: He''s most likely suffering from a transient psychosis with an intermittent rage disorder, punctuated by episodic radical mood swings, but his prognosis is good for full recovery." "How can you say all that without even meeting him?" "I thought you said he''s 13?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so dumb she had to call 411 to get the number for 911.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama so dumb, her favorite color is clear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama so big, fat, and clumsey, when she tried to get to Wal-Mart, she stumbled over K-Mart and landed right on Target.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a blonde busy? (see below) How do you keep a blonde busy? (see above)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dumb blonde, a smart blonde, and Santa Claus were invited to a party. On the way, the dumb blonde''s car broke down. The smart blonde missed the bus. Two of Santa Claus'' reindeer ran away. Who got to the party first? The dumb blonde, because the other two don''t exist!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A local psychic hotline opened up a new number especially for frogs, called "The Psychic Frog-line." A frog called, wanting to know his future. "You will meet a beautiful young girl," predicted the psychic. "This is great!" said the frog. "Where will I meet her? At a party? At the pond?" "No," replied the psychic. "Next semester in a biology class."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many paranoids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What exactly do you mean by that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was recently fired from her cashier job, because she kept stealing money from the register. She went looking for work the next day. A few days later, she came to a man who needed someone. "I''m here for the paint job", the blonde said eagerly. "Alright. Take this paint and brush, and go paint my backyard porch", replied the man. The blonde immediately started painting. After she was done, she decided to do a second coat. When she was finished, she went to the man to get her pay. "I finished it, and did a second coating too! By the way, that''s not a Porsche, it''s a new BMW".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How was copper wire invented? Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mushroom walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender, not wanting to serve a mushroom, says "Uh uh, I''m not serving no mushroom." "Aw, come on - I''m a fungi!" the mushroom replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was standing in front of a vending machine. She put in a dollar, pushed a button and a coke came out. She put in another dollar, pushed a different button and an iced tea came out. The blonde kept doing this, until the man behind her became impatient. "Excuse me, can I just get a drink, THEN you can continue whatever you''re doing???" "No way!" exclaimed the blonde. "I''m not giving up this machine when I''m winning!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cat''s dictionary. Purring: Sound of a cat manufacturing cuteness. Purrverse: Poem about a strange kitty. Purranoia: The fear that your cat is up to something. Human Being: Automatic door opener for cats. Purrpetual: Everlasting love for domesticated felines. Purrson: A male kitty. Purrpetual motion: A kitty playing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women were sitting beside each other in the airport. "Where are you flying to?", the woman on the right asked. With an attitude, the other replied "You should never end a sentece with the word ''to''". "Ok", said the woman on the right. "Where are you flying to, bitch?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to a psychiatrist and explained his problem. "Two weeks ago I had a dream that I was a tippee. Then, the next day, I dreamt I was a wigwam. In my next dream, I was a teepee again, and this has been happening the whole too weeks! What''s wrong with me, Doc?". "It''s simple. You''re just two tents".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two scientists were discussing their latest behaviour-modification research. "We''ve started something new," said the first scientist. "For some of our more dangerous experiments, we''re now using lawyers." "Lawyers?" questioned her colleague. "But we''ve always used rats." "Well, you know how it is. You get so attached to the rats."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister gave birth in a state-of-the-art delivery room. It was so high tech that the baby came out cordless!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many car salesmen does it take to change a light bulb? A. I''m just going to work this out on my calculator, and I think you''re going to be pleasantly surprised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t ghosts make good magicians? You can see right through them!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: Doctor doctor, J keep seeing doubles! Doctor: Please take a seat. Patient: Which one?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time, when I was a kid, I forgot to do my homework, so I stole someone else''s and turned it in. After class, the teacher pulled me over. She asked why I didn''t turn in the homework. I said, guess I forgot to change the name on it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had four cappuccinos at one time. I was bouncing off the walls. Good thing they were padded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t mean to agitate the police officer. Water balloons are good fun, but he had to get all mad. Then he grabbed that metal baton thingy. That''s a lot less fun than a water balloon. I even said "think fast!" He didn''t say that to me when he used the baton on my face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is boxing a sport? If I beat someone up in an alley and someone sees it, I get arrested. If I beat someone up in an arena where thousands see it happen, I get cheered. I''ve done both. I like the alley better though.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Existentialists does it take to change a light bulb? What light bulb?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so big that when pirates see her they say, "LAND HO!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mom was out walking with her 4 year old daughter. the child picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. The mother asked her not to do that. "Why?" "Because it''s been laying outside and is dirty and probably has germs." At this point, the child looked at her mom with total admiration and asked, "Wow! How do you know all this stuff?" "Uh," the mom was thinking quickly, everyone knows this stuff, "Um, it''s on the mommy test. You have to know it, or they don''t let you be a mommy." "Oh." They walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but the child was evidently pondering this new information. "I get it!" she beamed. "Then if you flunk, you have to be the daddy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so dumb, she thought that a Playstation was a day care place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Madam Madam who? Madam foot''s caught in the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat that when she went bungee jumping, she took down the whole bridge with her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat that she rents herself out as a jumping castle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? July July who? July like Bill Clinton', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day on a farm a farmer gets a new rooster and puts it in the hen house. The new rooster is talking to the old rooster and the old rooster says, "Just let me have 2 chickens and I''ll leave you alone." The young rooster says, "No old man these are my chickens." So the old rooster says, "Why don''t we have a race around the chicken coop to see who deserves the chickens?" The young rooster figuring he is faster agrees, and even desides to give the old rooster a 15 second head start. So when the race begins the old rooster takes off and 15 seconds later the young rooster begins running. By the time the roosters round the first bend the young rooster has almost caught the old rooster. Then as the go by the house "BANG" the farmer fires his shoot gun and says, "Damn, third gay rooster this month."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Famous Last Words "Oh come on, nobody''s died from this in years." "I saw it on Jackass last night." "My dad did it when he was a kid." "Yes, I''m sure that the power is off." "It''ll only hurt for a couple of days." "See, I''m not afraid of heights."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Famous Last Words: "The gun isn''t loaded, ok?" "Yes, I double checked." "This fuse should give us plenty of time." "I don''t think he has a gun." "This is a very safe neighborhood!" "I am 100% sure of the blast radius."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is off a Coast Guard bumper sticker: Support Search and Rescue: GET LOST!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My college doesn''t allow pets in my dorm, so when I got a kitten I had the guys in my dorm refer to him as "the Book" to avoid suspicion. One morning, as I carried the kitten out to my car in a crate, my girlfriend stopped me and asked, "where are you taking the Book?" "She''s getting Spayed today," I said. "Hmm..." she said. "I guess that means no sequels!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Darn those pushy metric system advocates! Give them 2.54 cm., and they''ll take 1.6093 km!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Famous Last Words "We''ll be safe here, trust me." "Who cares about the severe weather warning, those forecasters are always wrong anyway." "We''re not as high up as it looks, here I''ll show you." "Who cares about those heart condition warnings anyway, I wanna ride this thing!" "My friend did this a while ago. I don''t know how it turned out, I haven''t seen him since." "It''s just a slight tingle." "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!!!???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FAMOUS LAST WORDS "One sec, I''ve got to go the bathroom!" :) "It doesn''t hurt... that... bad..." "This stuff works just as well!" "It looks like it''s coming right towards us!" "Here, let me handle this, forget the cops!" "I read this in a ''how-to'' magazine once." "No I''m not a skydiver, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express Last Night." "Proper equipment is for rich people." "I don''t know. Let''s find out!" "I did it in a video game last night." "Did you hear that? Sounded like something big. Where''s that flashlight?" And finally... "OH SHIT!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I broke in to a gun shop last week. I didn''t know that the owner lived on-site. He must have spent every night for the last ten years thinking of what he would do to the poor, hapless soul who would try to break in. I pointed my gun at him and he held up a grenade as he ran at me. I should be able to breath again in a few years. The old shopkeeper is dead, but, man, he got a hell of a laugh in before he left the world, Kamikaze style.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, her Inuit name is Denali!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb, she thought a GameCube was a Rubik''s puzzle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, when she jumps in the ocean, people head for higher ground.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo self-centered momma is so fat, the world really does revolve around her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, your family photos have to be shot from a plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat and lazy, that her hair-do has been turned into a National Forest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama so stupid, she got fired at the M & M factory because she threw out all the W''s!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 people were asked to find the "hardest" word in the dictionary. One person found the word "happiness". One person found the word"photosynthesis". The last person found the word "dick".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, blondes usually screw in cars!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do railroad tracks and blondes have in common? They are both laid all over America!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a blonde to laugh on Friday? Tell her a joke on Monday!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde do when she wakes up? She goes home!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is like a door knob, everyone gets a turn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Little boy blue. Little Boy Blue who? Micheal Jackson!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are constipated people so mean and rude? ..because they don''t give a crap!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do hookers and bungee jump cords have in common? They''re both cheap, fast and if the rubber breaks, your dead!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so old that when I told her to act her age, she died!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob and Bo are hunting. Bob had a sever case of diarrhea so he decided to stay and rest up. Bo goes out and kills a big deer and guts it. He then thinks it would be funny if he laid the deers guts in Bob''s sleeping bag so he does and goes to sleep. Then he wakes up the next morning and see''s that Bob and the guts are gone. Then he notices Bob and asks how''s he feeling. Bob says, "My diarrhea was so bad I crapped my guts out but with God''s grace and these two fingers I got them all back in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Timmy had been having a hard time in math class and got an ''F'' on almost all of his report cards. His mom thought he''d be better off if he went to a private Catholic school. The very first day of school Timmy came home, went straight to his room and began working until he finally just fell asleep on his bed. This continued for a long time until he got his first report card from the new school and his mom was so proud when he got an ''A'' in Math. She said, "I knew you''d do better in a private school." Then she says how did you do so well?" and Timmy replies, "When I walked in and saw the guy nailed to the plus sign I knew they meant business."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it sounds like a duck, has a beak like a duck and feet like a duck, and swims like a duck, you still better make sure that it ain''t a platypus!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a Papal audience, a business man approached the Pope and made this offer: Change the last line of the Lord''s prayer from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our daily chicken." and KFC will donate 10 million dollars to Catholic charities. The Pope declined. Two weeks later the man approached the Pope again. This time with a 50 million dollar offer. Again the Pope delcined. A month later the man offers 100 million, this time the Pope accepts. At a meeting of the Cardinals, the Pope announces his decision in the good news/bad news format. "The good news is... that we have 100 million dollars for charities. The bad news is that we lost the Wonder Bread account!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving along an old dirt road when he sees this giant mud hole, but, he is not quick enough to swerve and avoid it. He climbs out of his car and walks along the road until he reaches a farm house. He goes in and asks the farmer to help him out of the hole. The farmer agrees and between the two of them they get the car out in about 15 minutes. The man offers to pay the farmer and asks how much he should give. The farmer says, "$200 should cover it because it took me a whole day." The man gets angry and shouts, "All day! It hardly took you 15 minutes." The farmer says, "Yea, but I had to fill the hole with mud too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asks his dad,"Dad, what is 6.9?" The dad answers, "69 interrupted by a period!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Santa have such big balls? Because he only comes once a year!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid that you sold your car for gas money!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One blonde was so dumb she got locked in a bathroom and pissed her self!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is like a turtle. If either one is on their back, they are screwed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circular room and tell her there is a vibrator in the corner. How does a blonde confuse you? When she comes out and says she found it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blonde jokes are there? One. The rest are all true stories.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a blonde and the internet? Not everyone has been on the internet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time 5 Indians captured 3 Americans and they said to go get fruit or they''ll beat them up. The 1st guy comes back with apples and the Indians tell him to shove 10 apples up his butt. He says "Ok - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5..." then he dies and goes to Heaven. The 2nd guy comes back with oranges and he was told the same. "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9..." then he bursts out laughing and laughs himself to death and he goes to Heaven. The 2 guys meet in Heaven and the 1st one says "why did you stop? you were so close!" "Because I saw the 3rd guy, he had pineapples!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you fit 4 gay guys on a chair? Turn it upside down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Osama Bin Laden and crabs have in common. They both irritate bush!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 men were out camping. At about 3:00 one man had to go to the bathroom. There were no toilets around and the men had no toilet paper! The man took a crap in the forest, but then had noting to wipe his butt with. He asked his friend what to do, and his friends said to wipe his butt with a 1 dollar bill. 5 minutes later the man came back with crap all over his hands. The friend asked what happened and the man said, "I didn''t have a 1 dollar bill, so I used 4 quarters!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is grosser than gross? When a midget walks by and says your hair smells nice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the name for a bandaid on a pumpkin? A pumpkin patch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid, you tried to kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so stupid you tried to kill a fish by drowning it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so stupid you invented glow in the dark sun glasses!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb you invented water proof tea bags!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat, when you went outside wearing a yellow dress everybody called "TAXI"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly, you can''t even turn on a lightbulb!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat that everybody has to talk behind your back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so ugly, when she went to go rob a bank she didn''t have to use no gun, she just reached her head over the counter and said put the money in the bag!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, I went to the shooting gallery at the fair, one with the smiling clowns. I aimed and fired. Imagine my reaction when the target started yelling obscenities and charged. "WOW! These fairs are really getting high-tech," I thought. Just to impress the girls watching, I held my ground and continued firing. Pretty soon, he lost all of his teeth, but he still kept coming. And that was some realistic blood! I aimed up at the forehead, and the target dropped like a rock. A security guard walked up to me and said, "How do you feel? You just killed a carnie, you sicko!" "Wow, real carnival people!" I said, "I gotta get some of those for my shotgun at home! Carnies are cheaper than paper targets, and you don''t have to worry about the guilt from killing the precious trees!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A city mouse had a country mouse stay for the weekend, and spent the whole time offering urban advice. On the last evening of the country mouse''s visit, they were dining in the kitchen when in came the largest cat the country mouse had ever seen. "Don''t panic," said the town mouse, "Leave this to me." Marching up to the cat she said, "Bow wow wow wow! The cat turned and ran from the room. "How did you do that?" asked the country mouse. "Like I told you," said the town mouse, "it pays to learn a second language."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three guys on the C.N. tower and the tour guide told them that if either one of them could throw their watches over the side and run down and catch it, they would win 1 million dollars. The first guy threw his watch over and when he got down, it was shattered into a million pieces. The same thing happened to the second guy. The third guy threw his watch over, went home and got a shower, had his dinner, and came back and caught his watch. The all wondered how he did it and he said, " I set it two hours slow"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The weather was very hot, so this man wanted desperately take a dive in the nearby lake. He didn''t bring his swimming outfit, but who cared? He was all alone. So he undressed and got into the water. After some delightful minutes of cool swimming, a pair of old ladies walked onto the shore in his direction. He panicked, got out of the water and grabbed a bucket, which laid on the sandy beach. He held the bucket in front of his private parts and sighed with relief. The ladies got nearby and looked at him. He felt awkward and wanted to move. Then one of the ladies said, "You know, I have a special gift, I can read minds." "Impossible," said the embarrassed man, "You really know what I think?" "Yes," the lady replied, ''I know that you think that the bucket you''re holding has a bottom in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night Aggie says to George "Think I''ll go to bingo the night George... when I''m gone you make sure the youngsters get in and go to bed" Now George and Aggie had thirteen kids the last time they counted. So when Aggie went off to bingo, George went out and made the youngsters come in and get to bed. For about three or four hours, one little boy kept crying and crying, so George takes off up with a split and hits the floor, the little boy cries harder and harder. George sputters out "What are you bawling about?" The little boy replies "I want to go to me own home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?" The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don''t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I''ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?" The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied... "My wife''s first husband."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde is getting on an elevator and meets a gentleman on board. "T.G.I.F." she says. "S.H.I.T" was his reply. Puzzled she replied "T.G.I.F" The gentleman was getting a little disturbed the the remark, so he says again. "S.H.I.T.". The Blonde leans over and whispers "THANK GOD IT''S FRIDAY". The gentleman responses with "SORRY, HONEY IT''S THURSDAY".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys own a zoo. To their angst their lone female gorilla goes into heat. Knowing she will be violent if not looked after they take her to a vet for advice. He says she needs to be bred by a male gorilla. Knowing they can''t find a male they weigh their options. One says to the other, hey that guy that cleans the cages is kind of crazy, maybe he''ll do it. They ask him if he''d do it for $500. He asks for some time to think about it. The next day he comes back to the guys and says he''ll do it on three conditions. 1) No commitments, once it''s done it''s over. 2) If there is any kids I''m not responsible. The two say O.K. no problem, what''s your third condition? Well he says it''s going to take me a few weeks to come up with the 500 dollars......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat, when she sat on a quarter, boogers came out of George Washington''s nose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Lawyer name his daughter? Answer: Sue', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you go skinny dippin'' if you''re fat? Is it possible to fight on a luv seat? If you drink tap water can you tap dance? by:lilpapa92', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn''t getting any respect. Later that morning he went to a local card and novelty shop and bought a small sign that read, "I''m the Boss". He then taped it to his office door. Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said. "Your wife called, she wants her sign back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around. "What the hell do you think you''re doing?" "I''m a chiropractor, and I''m just keeping in practice while I''m waiting in line." "Well, I''m a lawyer, but you don''t see me screwing the guy in front of me, do you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. The female always makes the rules. 2. The rules can change without notice. 3. Males can''t know the rules. 4. If the female suspects that the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some of the rules. 5. The female never bears the blame for being wrong. 6. If the female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something that the male did or said which was wrong. 7. If rule 6 applies, the male must apologize for causing the misunderstanding. 8. The female can change her mind. 9. The male must never change his mind without the consent of the female. 10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time. 11. The male must always remain calm unless the female wants him to be angry or upset. 12. The female must never let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset. 13. If the female has PMS, there are no rules. 14. The male cannot diagnose PMS.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde take a right into the ditch? Her blinker was on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister." Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town, doing what boys and girls do on back roads some distance from town. Things were getting hot and heavy when the girl stopped the boy. "I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I''m actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex," she said. The boy just looked at her for a couple of seconds, but then reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing. After the cigarette, the boy just sat in the driver''s seat looking out the window. "Why aren''t we going anywhere?" asked the girl. "Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I''m actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a blonde busy on a rainy day? Tell her to touch the rainbow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting hunter asked, "When did you bag him?" The host said, "That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my wife." "What''s he stuffed with?" asked the visiting hunter, and the host said, "My wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes rented a boat and fished in a lake every day. One day they caught 30 fish. One blonde said to her friend, "Mark this spot so that we can come back here again tomorrow." The next day, when they were driving to rent the boat, the same blonde asked her friend, "Did you mark that spot?" Her friend replied, "Yeah, I put a big ''X'' on the bottom of the boat." The first one said, "You stupid fool! What if we don''t get that same boat today!?!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid that when you send a FAX you put a stamp on it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men were trekking through the desert and came across a magician. The magician was standing at the top of a slide. The magician said, ''''You may each go down the slide, asking for a drink. When you reach the bottom of the slide you shall land in a huge glass of that drink." The first man went down yelling, ''''Beeeerrr!!!'''' Plop! He landed in a glass of beer. The second guy went down the slide yelling,''''lemonadeee!!!'''' Plop! He landed in a glass of lemonade. The third guy went down the slide yelling ''''wheeeeeeeee!!!''''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There''s too much fraternizing with the enemy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old preacher was dying. He sent a message for his IRS agent and his Lawyer (both church members), to come to his home. When they arrived, they were ushered up to his bedroom. As they entered the room, the preacher held out his hands and motioned for them to sit on each side of the bed. The preacher grasped their hands, sighed contentedly, smiled and stared at the ceiling. For a time, no one said anything. Both the IRS agent and Lawyer were touched and flattered that the old preacher would ask them to be with him during his final moment. They were also puzzled because the preacher had never given any indication that he particularly liked either one of them. Finally, the Lawyer asked, "Preacher, why did you ask the two of us to come?" The old preacher mustered up some strength, then said weakly, " Jesus died between two thieves, and that''s how I want to go, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his friend are out camping and the first one needs to go to the bathroom and they have no toliet paper so he asks his friend what to do. His friend says just wipe it with your hand and smack it on a rock. So the man does so and smacks his hand on a rock and it hurts him really bad, so to reduce the pain he sucks on his hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for three shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What happened?" The guy replies, "I just found out my younger brother is gay." He finish''s his shots and leaves. The next day he comes back and orders five shots and the bartender asks, " What happened this time?" The man replies, "I just found out my older brother is gay and I always looked up to him." The man finish''s his shots and leaves. The next day he comes back and orders twelve shots. The bartender says, "Doesn''t anybody in your family like women?" The man replies, " Yea, my mom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, she fell in love and broke it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows were talking in the field. One cow says, "Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that''s going around?" The other cow answers, "Yeah, makes you glad we''re penguins, doesn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a BMW & a porcupine? A porcupine has pricks on the outside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear and a rabbit are walking together and they find a magic lamp. They decide to rub it and a genie comes out. The genie says, "Thank you for releasing me I will give you both 3 wishes." The bear thinks and says, "I wish all the other bears in this forest were lady bears." Then the rabbit says, "I wish for a little motorcycle that is perfect for me." The genie grants both wishes. Then the bear decides his second will be for all the bears in the country besides him to be female The rabbit wishes for a little helmet that fits his head and has holes for his ears. Then the bear says, "Why not have all the bears in the world be girls." Then the rabbit, thinking quickly, says, "I wish the bear was gay," and speeds off on his motorbike.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Midtown Manhattan a police officer arrives at the scene of what appears to be a bad accident. A pedestrian is lying in the crosswalk. The driver of the car under suspicion says, "I swear I didn''t touch him! I saw him at the crosswalk, I came to a complete stop, motioned for him to cross, and he fainted."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The movie producer was planning his next blockbuster - an action docudrama about famous composers. So he set up a meeting with Jean-Claude Van Damme, Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger and offered them the chance to select which famous musicians they''d portray. "Chopin has always been my favorite," said Van Damme. "That''s the part for me." "I''ve always admired Mozart," Stallone said. "I''d love to play him." The producer turned to Schwarzenegger. "And you, Arnold? Who do you want to be?" There was a long silence, then he replied, "I''ll be Bach."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sky was dark the moon was high all alone just her and I Her hair was so soft Her eyes so blue I knew just what she wanted to do her skin so soft her legs so fine I ran my fingers down her spine I didn''t know how But I tried my best I started by placing my hand on her breast I remember my fear My fast beating heart but slowly she spread her legs apart, and when I did it I felt no shame and all at once the white stuff came At last it''s finished it''s all over now my first time ever at milking a cow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That sometimes when you cry, no one sees your tears. Sometimes when you''re sad, no one understands your pain. Sometimes when you''re happy, no one sees your smile. But you just have to fart once, and EVERYBODY knows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the sailor who died, and wanted to be buried at sea by his 5 blonde daughters? His daughters all drowned digging the grave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple is having a nice dinner at a local restaurant, having a good time telling blonde jokes. Suddenly a blonde approached them and slapped her hand down on the table. She angrily tells them that she can take a blonde joke as well as the next person, but it isn''t nice to keep bashing them in public. The couple apologize and changes the topic. A few minutes later the woman needs to go to the restroom, so she goes off, and she is followed by the blonde. After 10 minutes the blonde comes out frusturated, and storms out the front door. The woman calmly comes out and sits down at her table. The man asks what happened in there. The woman replies, "Well, as I was washing my hands, the blonde came in and pulled a razor on me!" The man replies, "Oh my god, what happened?" The woman bursts out laughing, "Well, nothing, luckily she didn''t find a place to plug it in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so poor I went in your front door and came out the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the boy eat his homework? Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall. The owner asks the clerk, "What''s with that guy over there by the wall?" The clerk says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn''t find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative." The owner says, "You idiot! You can''t treat a cough with laxatives!" The clerk says, "Oh yeah? Look at him, he''s afraid to cough!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a psychiatrist''s office covered only in Saran Wrap. He says to the doctor, "I''ve felt so weird lately, Doc, can you tell me what''s wrong?" The doctor replied, "Well, I can clearly see your nuts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 21999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t you slip into something comfortable. Like a coma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I haven''t seen anyone run that fast since Twinkies went on sale.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blondes are like a rollercoaster, everyone gets a ride!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newly married man was discussing his honeymoon. He says to his buddy at lunch, "Last night, I rolled over, tapped my beautiful young wife on the shoulder, gave her a wink, and we had ourselves a performance! Later that night, about 2 o''clock, I rolled over, gave my sweetie a nudge, and we had ourselves another performance. Well, being so newly married and not yet tired of the task, I waited quietly in bed while my beauty slept until I couldn''t wait any longer. It was 4 o''clock when I gave her a little nudge. She opened her blue eyes and smiled sweetly. We immediately had ourselves a rehearsal." "A rehearsal?" his buddy asks, "Don''t you mean a performance?" "No, because a rehearsal is when nobody comes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a golf tour in Ireland , Tiger Woods drives his BMW into a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside. The pump attendant, obviously knows nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Irish manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is. "Top of the mornin'' to yer, sir" says the attendant. Tiger nods a quick "hello" and bends forward to pick up the nozzle. As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground. "What are those?" asks the attendant. "They''re called tees" replies Tiger. "Well, what on the good earth are they for?" inquires the Irishman. "They''re for resting my balls on when I''m driving" says Tiger. "Frickin ''eck" says the Irishman, "BMW thinks of everything!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Irishman sitting in your backyard? Paddy O''Furniture', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tutor who tooted the flute Tried to teach two young tooters to toot Said the two to the tutor Is it harder to toot or To tutor two tooters to toot?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Broccoli, while not exoccoli, Is within an inach of being spinach.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s worse than raining cats and dogs? A. Hailing taxicabs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl got on her grandpa''s lap and said, "Did God make me?" "Yes," the grandpa replied. "Did God make you, too?" "Yes," the grandpa said. "Well," the little girl said, while running her fingers down his wrinkles and looking at his thinning hair, "He sure is doing a better job nowadays."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 7-year-old and his 4-year-old brother are upstairs in their bedroom. The 7-year-old is explaining that it is high time that the two of them begin swearing. When his little brother responds enthusiastically, the 7-year old says, ''''When we go downstairs for breakfast this morning, I''ll say ''hell'' and you say ''ass''.'''' The 4-year-old happily agrees. As the two boys are seating themselves at the breakfast table, their mother walks in and asks her older son what he would like to eat for breakfast. The 7-year-old replies, ''''Aw hell, Mom, I''ll just have some Cheerios." The surprised mother reacts quickly and whacks him one. The boy runs upstairs, bawling and rubbing his behind. With a sterner note in her voice, the mother then asks the younger son, ''''And what would YOU like for breakfast?'''' ''''I don''t know,'''' the 4-year-old blubbers, ''''but you can bet your ASS it''s not gonna be Cheerios!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, "Mommy, can little girls have babies?" "No," said his mom, "Of course not." Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, "It''s okay, we can play that game again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde get pulled over by the police? A: Her headlights weren''t working, so she was flashing people', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the accident at the mall? There was a power outage and a group of blondes was stuck on the escalator for 3 hours!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the first day of college, and time for the usual ''authoritative declaration of the not to be broken rules''. The principal, in typical intimidating fashion, addressed the students: "The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students. The male dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all the female students". The principal, sensing he was on a roll, stood tall and powerful as he covered the punishments for breaking the rules. "Be wary, anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20. It doesn''t stop there though, anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60. Being caught a third time will cost you $180. Are there any questions?" "How much for a season pass?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the new sushi bar that caters exclusively to lawyers? It''s called, Sosumi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call one lawyer thrown off a bridge into a river? A: Pollution. Q: What do you call all the lawyers thrown off a bridge? A: Solution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a lawyer and he was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, "You''re beautiful!" and then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that so she stayed by his side. A couple minutes later his eyes fluttered open and he said "You''re cute!" Well, the wife was disappointed because instead of "beautiful" it was "cute." She said, "What happened to ''beautiful?''" His reply was, "The drugs are wearing off!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Good girls loosen a few buttons when it''s hot. -Bad girls make it hot by loosening a few buttons. -Good girls only own one credit card and rarely use it. -Bad girls only own one bra and rarely use it. -Good girls wax their floors. -Bad girls wax their bi', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a father sent his kid to bed. Five minutes later the boy screamed, ''''Dad! Can you get me a glass of water!?!'''' ''''No. You had your chance.'''' A minute later the boy screamed ''''Dad!! Can you get me a glass of water?'''' ''''No. You had your chance. Next time you ask I''ll come up there and spank you.'''' ''''Dad! When you come up to spank me can you bring me a glass of water?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy with two black eyes walks into church one Sunday. The priest notices him and is very concerned. "What happened, my child?" "I was singing in the choir, Father, and I noticed that the girl in front of me had a wedgie, so I pulled it out, and she punched me in the eye." "Okay; how did you get the other black eye?" "Well, I thought I''d done something wrong, so I put her wedgie back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so fat the only thing stopping her from getting into Jenny Craig is the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby. One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth, and in the end, there were two little baby boys. The blond guy turned to his wife and angrily said, "All right, who''s the other father?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Joe Joe who? Jo mama', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would punch you but I couldn''t make you any uglier.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Whose there? Says Says who? Says me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An older couple is lying in bed one morning, having just awakened from a good night''s sleep. He takes her hand and she responds, "Don''t touch me!" "Why not?" he asks. She answers back, "Because I''m dead." The husband says, "What are you talking about? We''re both lying here in bed together and talking to one another." She says, "No, I''m definitely dead." He insists, "You''re not dead. What in the world makes you think you''re dead?" "Because nothing hurts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s invisible and smells like carrots? A: Bunny farts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two children were in a doctor''s waiting room. The little girl was softly sobbing. "Why are you crying?" asked the little boy. "I''m here for a blood test, and they''re going to cut my finger," said the girl. When he heard this, the little boy started to cry. "Why are you crying?" asked the girl. The boy looked at her worriedly and said, "I''m here for a urine test."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Beethoven doing today? -Decomposing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Ontario coupling were on vacation, driving around the province of Nova Scotia. At noon, they arrived at the town of Tatamagouche. The two began to bicker about the pronunication of the town''s name. The husband suggested that they stop for lunch and ask. At the restaurant, they placed their order. The wife asks, "Excuse me, but could you slowly pronounce the name of this place?" The employee looks surprised, but complies. "Bur ... ger ... King" (BTW the town''s name is pronounced Tat ah mah goosh)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning a little girl in her Sunday best was running so she wouldn''t be late for church. As she ran she kept praying, "Dear God, please don''t let me be late to church. Please don''t let me be late to church...." And, as she was running she tripped and fell. When she got back up she began praying again, Please, God don''t let me be late to church -- but don''t shove me either!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner market. The owner didn''t know what Johnny''s problem was, but the boys would constantly tease him. They would always comment that he was two bricks shy of a load, or two pickles short of a barrel. To prove it, sometimes they would offer Johnny his choice between a nickel (5 cents) and a dime (10 cents) and John would always take the nickel - they said, because it was bigger. One day after John grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside and said, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. They think you don''t know the dime is worth more than the nickel. Are you grabbing the nickel because it''s bigger, or what?" Slowly, Johnny turned toward the store owner and a big grin appeared on his face and Johnny said, "Well, if I took the dime, they''d stop doing it, and so far I have saved $20!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your baby''s first words were, "Attention, K-mart shoppers!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: Will you punish me for something I didn''t do? Teacher: Of course not! Boy: Good cause I didn''t do my homework!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An 83-year old woman decided that she''d seen and done everything, and the time had come to depart from this world. After considering various methods of doing away with herself, she came to the conclusion that the quickest and surest method would be to shoot herself through the heart. The trouble was, she wasn''t certain about exactly where her heart was, so she phoned her doctor and asked him. He told her that her heart was located two inches below her left nipple. So she shot herself in the left kneecap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five surgeons were taking a coffee break and discussing their work. "I think accountants are the easiest to operate on," said the first surgeon. "You open them up and everything inside is numbered." "I think librarians are the easiest to operate on," said the second. "You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order." "I like to operate on electricians," said the third. "You open them up and everything inside is color-coded." "I like to operate on lawyers," said the fourth. "They''re heartless, spineless, gutless, and their heads and their asses are interchangeable." "I like engineers," said the fifth. "They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beckham went into training one day and saw Owen with a thermo-flask. He asked him what it was for and Owen said "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold". The next day Beckham came into training with a thrmo-flask. So Owen asked him what he had in it. He said "well you said it kept hot things hot, and cold things cold so Posh told me to put in some coffee and enough choc-ices for the lads but when I looked into the thermo-flask, when I got here, the choc-ices had melted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man speaks frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor queries. "No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a pregnant women. On the way to the hospital, she got into a wreck. When she woke up her babies were already born. She asked the docter if she could see her babies. He said yes, and don''t worry your brother named them. The pregnant woman freaked out and said her brother was an idiot. The doctor said the girl''s name is Denice. The pregnant women said, "Maybe my brother is not such an idiot." Then the docter said that the boy''s name is "da nephew".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl and her best friend were at a cafe. The girl said her boyfriend finally told her about marriage. Her best friend asked her what he said. "He is married and has 3 kids," she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she has more chins than a chinese phone book!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If two''s a company and three''s a crowd... what''s four and five? NINE!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quickly read through the following text and count the number of F''s in it. FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS Managed it? Scroll down only after you have counted them! > >> >>> >>>> >>>>> >>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>> >>>>>> >>>>> >>>> >>> >> > OK? How many? Three? Wrong, there are six - no joke! Read again! FINISHED FILES ARE THE RESULT OF YEARS OF SCIENTIFIC STUDY COMBINED WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YEARS The reasoning is that the brain cannot process the word "OF". Incredible or what? Anyone who counts all six F''s on the first go is a genius. Three is normal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ghost Stories by I.C. Spooks Rocket to the sun by R.U.Nuts Your Book of Glamour by Q.T Pie The Camel Ride by Major Bum - issore How to Grow Shorter by Neil Down How to Grow Taller by Stan Dup', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Crime and Punishment by Laura Norda The Use of Natural Fertilizers; by G.G. Dunnit The Way to Quick Riches; by Robbin Banks Holidays in Britain; by A. Pauline Whetha Contagious Diseases; by Willie Catchit Driving Through Germany; by Otto Mobile Broken Window; by Eva Brick Monsters; by Frank N. Stein Cliff Tragedy; by Eileen Dover Even More to come, i promise!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Hole in the Bucket by Lee King Long Walk by Miss. D. Bus The Playground by C. Saw Fitting Carpets by Walter Wall Around the World by Sir Cumfrence Flexibility by Ben Dover Bladder Controld by Idon P. Freely', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it to the class the next day. When the time came to present what they''d found, the first little boy walked up to the front of the class made a small white dot on the blackboard and sat back down. Puzzled, the teacher asked him just what it was. "It''s a period,'''' said the little boy. "Well, I can see that,'''' she said, ''''but what is so exciting about a period?'''' " I don''t know,'''' said the little boy, ''''but this morning my sister was missing one, Daddy had a heart attack, Mommy fainted, and the man next door shot himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a dark and stormy night in the small Newfoundland village when Jarge''s wife suddenly went into labor. The doctor came to the house and realized there was no time to get to the hospital in the city, the baby was coming now! Just then the power went out. Jarge brought out the kerosene lantern and held it for the doctor. Within minutes, Jarge''s son was born. The elated parents were surprised when the doctor declared that another baby was coming. Soon, another baby had come into the world. And then a third. Jarge, somewhat in shock at the sudden prospect of supporting such a large family, started to back away. But wait, the doctor soon realized the end was not in sight. "Bring the light closer, Jarge, I think there''s another one!" "No way," cried Jarge, fleeing from the room. "It''s the light that''s attracting them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning, a priest wakes up and decides to go golfing. He calls his boss and says that he feels very sick, and won''t be able to go to work. Way up in heaven, Saint Peter sees all this and asks God, ''''Are you really going to let him get away with this?'''' ''''No, I guess not,'''' says God. The priest drives about five to six hours away, so he doesn''t bump into anyone he knows. The golf course is empty when he gets there. So he takes his first swing, drives the ball 495 yards away and gets a hole in one. Saint Peter watches in disbelief and asks, '''' Why did you let him do that?'''' To this God says, ''''Who''s he going to tell?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old, old man was lying in his death bed upstairs. His most favorite food in the world was chocolate chip cookies. As he lay there, gasping for each breath, he was sure he could smell freshly-baked chocolate chip cookies. He crawled out of bed and slowly limped down the stairs. Sure enough, across the kitchen, there was a huge platter of chocolate chip cookies on the table. He finally made it to the table and he reached a shaking hand towards the cookies. Suddenly, his wife slapped his hand sharply and yelled, "DON''T TOUCH THOSE-they''re for the funeral!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day an elderly couple was out for an afternoon drive and had to stop for gas. Attendant: " Would you like me to check the oil?" Wife: "What did he say?" Husband: "He wants to know if I want the oil checked." Attendant: "Would you like me to top up the washer fluid?" Wife: "What did he say?" Husband: "He wants to know if I want the fluids topped up." When the attendant heard them talking, he asked, "By the way, where are you from?" The husband replied, "We are from Nova Scotia." "Ah," said the attendant. "Years ago I was in Nova Scotia and had the worst love affair ever." The wife said, "What did he say?" Husband: "He thinks he knows you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day this woman got to thinking about how her and her husband''s sex life. She realized they basically didn''t have one, so she decided to go to the doctor and get him some pills. The next day she went and the doctor told her to put 1 pill in her husbands coffee every morning. So, the woman went home and the next morning she did exactly what the doctor perscribed. The woman thought that since the pills worked so well she would put more and more pills in his coffee. As the week passed the doctor decided to call. When the doctor called their daughter answered and when the doctor asked how things were going she replied,"Well, my mom''s dead, I''m pregnant, my brothers raw and dad is in the backyard saying,"here kitty kitty."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and brunette jump off a cliff at the same time. Why did the brunette hit the floor before the blonde? The blonde asked for directions!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wanted to determine if both his wife and mistress were faithful to him. So he decided to send them on the same cruise, then later question each one on the other''s behavior. When his wife returned, he asked her about the people on the trip in general, then casually asked her about the specific behavior of the passenger he knew to be his mistress. "She slept with nearly every man on the ship," his wife reported. The disheartened man then rendezvoused with his cheating mistress to ask her the same questions about his wife. "She was a real lady," his mistress said. "How so?" the encouraged man asked. "She came on board with her husband and never left his side."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An oil company was drilling test pits on the West coast of Newfoundland and never found anything so instead of filling the hole up they got a clever idea to cover the hole with an outhouse. So a week after, a Newfoundlander came across it in the woods and decided to use it. The next day another fella came and found him dead on the toilet. The police open an investigation to try and find out what happened to him. They asked his wife if there was anything wrong with him or if he was acting strange that day. His wife replied, " My husband was in perfect shape, the only thing strange about him is that he holds his breath until he hears a splash."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A company, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hires a new CEO. This new boss is determined to rid the company of all slackers. On a tour of the facilities, the CEO notices a guy leaning on a wall. The room is full of workers and he wants to let them know he means business! The CEO walks up to the guy and asks, "And how much money do you make a week?" Undaunted, the young fellow looks at him and replies, "I make $200.00 a week." The CEO hands the guy $200 in cash and screams, "Here''s a week''s pay,now GET OUT!" Feeling pretty good about his first firing, the CEO looks around the room and asks " Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-off did here?" With a sheepish grin, one of the other workers mutters, " Pizza delivery guy"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just found out that I was switched at birth. Legally, I shouldn''t come to work knowing my employee records may now contain false information. I can''t come in to work today because I''ll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. OK? When I got up this morning I took two Ex-Lax in addition to my Prozac. I am stuck in the blood pressure machine down at the pharmacy. I''ve used up all my sick days...so I''m calling in dead The voices told me to clean all the guns today. The dog ate my car keys, so now I have to hitchhike to the vet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are quotes made by real police officers: "If you run, you''ll only go to jail tired." "The handcuffs are tight because they''re new. They''ll stretch out after you wear them a while." "So, you don''t know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?" "No, sir, we don''t have quotas any more. We used to have quotas, but now we''re allowed to write as many tickets as we want." "Warning! You want a warning? Okay, I''m warning you not to do that again or I''ll give you another ticket." "Life''s tough; it''s tougher if you''re stupid." "In God we trust, all others are suspects."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At Heathrow Airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a compass, a protractor, and a graphical calculator. Authorities believe he is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He is being charged with carrying weapons of math instruction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 70-year-old man goes to the doctor''s for a physical. The doctor runs some tests and says to the man, ''''Well, everything seems to be in top condition physically, but what about mentally? How is your connection with God?'''' And the man says, ''''Oh me and God? We''re tight. We have a real bond, he''s good to me. Every night when I have to get up to go to the bathroom, he turns on the light for me, and then, when I leave, he turns it back off.'''' Well, upon hearing this the doctor was astonished. He called the man''s wife and said, ''''I''d like to speak to you about your husband''s connection with God. He claims that every night when he needs to use the restroom, God turns on the light for him and turns it off for him again when he leaves. Is this true?'''' And she says, ''''That idiot, he''s been peeing in the refrigerator!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him that because he was wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5,000 in a safety competition. "What are you going to do with the prize money?" the officer asked. The man responded, "I guess I''ll go to driving school and get my license." At that moment, his wife, who was seated next to him, chimed in, "Officer, don''t listen to him. He''s a smart aleck when he''s drunk." This woke up the guy in the back seat, who, when he saw the cop, blurted out, "I knew we wouldn''t get far in this stolen car." At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a voice asked, "Are we over the border yet?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She walked around to look at the artwork. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I''m drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like. Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing the girl replied, "They will in a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is walking down the docks when he sees a quadriplegic woman crying in a corner. Trying to be a nice guy he walks up and asks her what''s wrong. "I''ve never been hugged." replies the woman. The man figures it would be a nice thing to do, so he picks her up and hugs her. She smiles. Then her face drops and she starts crying again. "What''s the matter now?" asks the man. "I''ve never been kissed," says the woman. The man leans down and kisses the woman on the lips for a brief moment. The woman smiles for a bit, then starts sobbing again. The man, a bit annoyed, asks her again what''s wrong. The woman replies, "Because I don''t have arms and legs I''ve never been screwed." The man picks up the woman and carries her down the dock, then tosses her off the side of the dock into the water. The man yells at the woman, "NOW YOU''RE SCREWED!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SHAPING UP FOR A GOOD EXCUSE A police officer pulls over this guy who''s been weaving in and out of the lanes. He goes up to the guy''s window and says, "Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyser tube." The man says, "Sorry, officer, I can''t do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that, I''ll have a really bad asthma attack." "Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample." "I can''t do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I''ll bleed to death." "Well, then, we need a urine sample." "I''m sorry, officer, I can''t do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that, I''ll get really low blood sugar." "All right, then I need you to come out here and walk this white line." "I can''t do that, officer." "Why not?" "Because I''m drunk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young brunette goes into the doctor''s office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me." She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so it goes on, everywhere she touches makes her scream. The doctor says, "You''re not really a brunette, are you?" She says, "No, I''m really a blonde." "I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a hospital in slight discomfort. "Can I have a hot towel to put on my nose, please?" The nurse was curious and asked, "Why would you like a hot towel to put on your nose?" The blonde replies, "Well, I wanted to sniff some coke to see what the big deal was, and I got an ice cube stuck up my nose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a casino and goes up to the craps table. She tells the dealers she wants to bet $10 000 on a single roll of the dice. The dealers figure that since shes a blonde, she must not know what shes doing, so they allow her to place the bet. Then the blonde starts to strip. The dealers ask her what shes doing and she replies, "I''m luckier when I''m naked. Hope ya don''t mind." So she rolls the dice and jumps up and down screaming, "I WON! I WON! YAY!" She hugs the dealers and picks up her chips and clothes and jumps excitedly away. While enjoying the view of the blonde jumping away, the second dealer leans over and whispers to the first dealer, "What''d she roll?" The first dealer says, "What? I wasn''t checking, I thought you were checking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband, so proud of the fact that his wife had given birth to 6 children, begins to call her "mother of six" rather than by her first name. The wife, amused at first, chuckles. A few years down the road, the wife has grown tired of her husband''s description. "Mother of six," he would say, "get me a beer!" "Hey mother of six, what''s for dinner tonight?" This situation persisted to boiling point. Finally, while attending a party with her husband, he jokingly yelled out, "Hey, mother of six, I think it''s time to go!" The wife seized the moment and shouted back, "I''ll be right with you - father of four!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother. The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight. The mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her. The wife cried, "What are we going to do?" "Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, a little boy and his family were having supper at his grandma''s house. Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When he received his plate, the little guy began eating right away. "Wait until we a say a prayer," his mother admonished. " I don''t have to," he replied. "Of course you do," his mother insisted. "We always say a prayer before eating at home." "That''s at home," he explained. "This is Grandma''s house and she knows how to cook!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The beautiful, vain blonde was visiting Las Vegas for the first time. She approached the roulette wheel, but it looked very confusing. "How should I bet?" she asked the man standing beside her. "Try betting your age," he suggested. So the blonde put $500 on the number 32. The ball landed on 36, and the blonde promptly fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an architect watched a mechanic remove engine parts from his car, a surgeon, waiting for his own car to be repaired, walked over. They introduced themselves, and began talking about their lines of work. "You know," said the architect, "I sometimes believe a mechanic''s work is as complicated as the work that we do." "Perhaps," the surgeon commented. "But let''s see him do it with the engine running."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a farmer who was very protective of his daughters. Before every date, he would meet the young man at the porch with his shotgun, and if he didn''t measure up, he''d make sure they left. One day all three of his daughters were going out on the same night. The first young man drove up and approached the porch. "Hi, my name is Joe, I''m here to get Flo, we''re going to the show, is she ready to go?" The farmer liked this guy, and let him leave with his daughter. Shortly, the next guy drove up and approached the porch. "Hi, my name is Freddy, I''m here to get Betty, we''re going for spaghetti, is she ready?" The farmer liked this guy too, and let him leave with his second daughter. Soon the third guy drove up and approached the porch. "Hi, my name is Chuck..." and the farmer shot him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting. "What''s up?" he asks. "I''m having a heart attack!" cries the woman. He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he is dialing, his 4-year old son comes up and says, "Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Ted''s hiding in your wardrobe and he''s got no clothes on!" The guy slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, past his screaming wife, and rips open the wardrobe door. Sure enough, there is his brother, totally naked, cowering on the wardrobe floor. ''''You bastard," says the husband. "My wife is having a heart attack and you''re running around with no clothes on scaring the kids!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man took a walk along a railroad track. Not paying attention, he got his foot stuck in a gap in the rails. Just then the whistle of the 10 a.m. train sounded in in the distance. He tried frantically to free himself, but to no avail. Looking up he prayed, "God, please get me free!" The Whistle sounded, again he pulled, no movement. "God! If you get my foot out I will stop smoking." The whistle sounded closer. Still pulling, he only seemed to get more stuck. "God! If you get my foot out I will stop smoking and drinking." Looking up he could now see the train engineer in the window of the engine. His foot still would not move. "God!!! If you get my foot out I will stop, smoking drinking and give my money to the poor!" At that moment his foot slipped from its grasp in the rail and he rolled clear of the train''s wheels............. "Never mind God I took care of it myself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a party, one man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. "What are you doing out here at 2 o''clock in the morning?" the officer asked. "I''m going to a lecture," the man said. "And who would be giving this lecture at this hour?" the cop asked. "My wife," the guy replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A groom and his bride are standing at the alter when the woman looks at her prospective husband and sees he has a set of golf clubs. "What on earth are you doing with those golf clubs in church?" she whispers. "Well," he replies, "this won''t take all afternoon, will it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old lady answered her door only to be confronted by a young vacuum cleaner salesman. "Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners." "Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven''t got any money," and she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door. "Don''t be too hasty," he said, "not until you''ve seen my demonstration." With that he emptied a bucket of dirt onto her hallway carpet. "If this vacuum cleaner doesn''t remove all traces of this dirt from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder." "Well," she said, "I hope you''re hungry, because the electricity was cut off this morning."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde have bruises around her bellybutton? A: Because her boyfriend was blond too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, Irishman, Scotsman and a fat man are all going skydiving. When they get to jump the Englishman shouts, "God save England!" The Scotsman shouts, "God save Scotland!" The Irishman shouts, "God save Ireland!" Then the fat man jumps and shouts, "God save whoever I land on!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A preacher dies, and when he gets to Heaven, he sees a New York cab driver who has more crowns. He says to an angel, "I don''t get it. I devoted my whole life to my congregation." The angel says, "We reward results. Did your congregation always pay attention when you gave a sermon?" The preacher says, "Once in a while someone fell asleep." The angel says, "Right. And when people rode in this guy''s taxi, they not only stayed awake, but they usually prayed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s another name for a push-up bra? False advertisement', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked women with only her privates covered with leaves. The wife doesn''t like it and moves on but the huband keeps looking. The wife asks, "What are you waiting for?" The husband replies, "Autumn."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher was having trouble teaching arithmetic to one little boy. So she said, "If you reached in your right pocket and found a nickel, and you reached in your left pocket and found another one, what would you have?" "Somebody else''s pants." the boy replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was watching her son pitch in a little league baseball. He wasn''t very good, walking all of the batters that came up to bat, but after every pitch, the mom was yelling wildy and cheering her wonderful son on. Because of all the batters he had walked, the score was 14-0 in the 1st inning. Finally, one little boy came up, hit a grounder, and made it safely to first. "Dang it," the mother muttered, "there goes his no-hitter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Chinese say: Baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men who walk in front of car get tired. Men who walk in back of car get exhausted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of soup do you order at a gay Chinese resturant? Cream of Yungi (Cream of Young Guy)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Saddam and an American were in the bathroom peeing in the urinals. When the American was done, he was going to leave without washing his hands. Saddam said, "You know, I learned to wash my hands." The American replied, "Well, I learned not to pee on my hands."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so dumb it took her an hour to make minute rice!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the phone rang, she excused herself from the sofa. A few seconds later she rejoined her male companion. "Who was it?" he asked. "My husband," she replied. "I better get going," he said. "Where was he?" "Relax. He''ll be late, he''s playing poker with you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two church members were going door to door, and knocked on the door of a woman who was not happy to see them. She told them in no uncertain terms that she did not want to hear their message and slammed the door in their faces. To her surprise, however, the door did not close and, in fact, bounced back open. She tried again, really put her back into it, and slammed the door again with the same result - the door bounced back open. Convinced these rude young people were sticking their foot in the door, she reared back to give it a slam that would teach them a lesson, when one of them said, "Ma''am, before you do that again, you need to move your cat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As soon as the newlyweds returned from their honeymoon, the young bride called her mother, who lived a couple of hours away. "How did everything go?" her mom asked. "Oh, mother," she began, "The honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic, we had a terrific time. But, mother, on our way back, Andy started using really horrible language. Stuff I''d never heard before. Really terrible four-letter words. You''ve got to come get me and take me home. Please, Mother!" the new bride sobbed over the telephone. "But, honey," the mother countered, "What four-letter words?" "I can''t tell you, mother, they''re too awful! Come get me, please!" "Darling, you must tell me what has gotten you so upset.... Tell mother what four-letter words he used." Still sobbing, the bride said, "Mother, words like dust, wash, iron, cook."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man died in a horrible fire. The mortician thought it was George, but the body was so badly burned that somebody would need to make a positive identification. That task fell to George''s two friends, Joe and Al. Joe: "He''s burnt pretty bad, all right. Roll him over." Joe looked at the dead man''s buttocks and said, "Nope, that ain''t George." Thinking the incident strange, the mortician straightened up the body and said nothing. He brought in Al. Al: "Wow, he''s burnt to a crisp. Roll him over." Again, "Nope, that ain''t George." Mortician: "How can you tell?" Al: "George had two assholes." Mortician: "What? How could he have two assholes?" Al: "Everybody knew George had two assholes. Whenever the three of us would go into town you''d hear people say, "Here comes George with those two assholes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus and Moses are playing golf. On the 5th hole, a shot over water to an island green, Moses hits his 6-iron and it lands perfectly on the green. Jesus takes out his 7-iron and begins tee-ing it up. Moses says: "The 7 isn''t enough club. It''ll go in the water" Jesus replies: "If Tiger Woods can do it, I can do it." He swings the 7-iron and sure enough, straight in the drink. He tees up a second ball and grabs his 7-iron again. Again Moses reminds him of his previous attempt and Jesus says, "If Tiger Woods can do it, I can do it." "PLOP" in the water, it goes again. He continues this until he has hit all his golf balls into the water. At this point, he begins walking out on the water looking down to locate his lost golf balls. The foursome behind them approaches the tee, spots Jesus out on the lake and says to Moses, "Hey, who does that guy think he is, Jesus Christ?" Moses replies, "No, Tiger Woods."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pope met with the Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Shimon Peres, leader of the Jewish nation. "Your holiness," said one of the Cardinals, "Mr. Peres wants to determine whether Jews or Catholics are superior by challenging you to a golf match." The Pope was greatly disturbed as he had never held a golf club in his life. "Not to worry," said the Cardinal, "We''ll call America and talk to Jack Nicklaus. We''ll make him a Cardinal, he can play Shimon Peres....we can''t lose!" Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made and, of course, Jack was honoured and agreed to play. The day after the match, Nicklaus reported to the Vatican to inform the Pope of his success in the match. "I came in second, your Holiness," said Nicklaus. "Second!?" exclaimed the surprised Pope. "You came in second to Shimon Peres!!??" "No," said Nicklaus, "second to Rabbi Palmer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man is playing golf with a priest. At a short hole the priest asks, "What are you going to use on this hole son?" The young man says, "An eight iron, father. How about you?" The priest says, "I''m going to hit a soft seven and pray." The young man hits his eight iron and puts the ball on the green. The priest tops his 7 iron and dribbles the ball out a few yards. The young man says, "I don''t know about you father, but in my church when we pray, we keep our head down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred had tried to be particularly careful about his language as he played golf with his priest. But on the twelfth hole, when he twice failed to hit out of a sand trap, he lost his resolve and let fly with a string of expletives. The preacher felt obliged to respond. "I have observed," said he in a calm voice, "that the best golfers do not use foul language." "I guess not, said Fred, "what the hell do they have to swear about?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A country club didn''t allow women on the golf course. Eventually, there was enough pressure that they decided to allow women on the course during the week. The ladies were satisfied with this arrangement, formed a women''s club, and became active. After about 6 months, the club board received a letter from the women''s club complaining about the men urinating on the golf course. Naturally, they just ignored the matter. After another 6 months, they received another letter reminding them of the previous letter and demanding action. After due deliberation they sent the women a letter advising them that they had been granted equal privileges!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The lady golfer was a determined, if not very proficient player. At each swipe she made at the ball, earth flew in all directions. "Gracious me," she exclaimed red-faced to her caddie, "the worms will think there''s an earthquake." "I don''t know," replied the caddie, "the worms round here are very clever. I''ll bet most of them are hiding underneath the ball for safety."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ll go and ask if we can go through, said Max to Jerry. The two golfers had been concerned for some time at the snail-like progress of two women, originally some holes ahead and now just in front of them on the ninth fairway. Max returned after only a few paces towards the ladies. "Jerry, this is very embarrassing, but would you mind going? That''s my wife up ahead and she''s playing with my mistress." Jerry returned having got no further forward than Max. "I say," he said, "what a coincidence..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He was a smooth operator, and at the club''s annual dance he attached himself to the prettiest lady golfer in the room and was boasting to her. "You know, they''re all afraid to play me. What do you think my handicap is?" "Well, where do you want me to start ?" came the quick response.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Ralph, both of equal ability, decide to have a round together and "play it as it lays" on all shots. Both hit their tee shots on the par-5 first hole down the middle and about 260 yards. They drive up for the second shot, and Bill hits his shot down the middle for an easy approach, but Ralph slices his over the trees and it ends up in the cart path of the adjoining hole. "Guess I get a free drop from the cart path," he says. "Oh no," says Bill, "We agreed. Play it as it lays." So Ralph drives Bill up to his ball in front of the green, drops him off and drives over to his ball on the cart path. Bill watches in amusement as sparks shower down from the practice swings of his opponent, then, in amazement as a perfectly struck shot lands on the green and rolls to within 3 ft. of the pin. Ralph drives back to the green. Bill says, "Great shot back there! What club did you use?" Ralph responds, "Your six iron."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick brings a friend to play golf with two of his buddies to complete a foursome. His buddies ask him if his friend can play golf. Dick says that he is very good. This guy hits the ball on the first hole in the bush, so his buddies look at him and say, "You said your friend was a good golfer." Dick says "Yes, he is watch him play." They see the ball come out of the bush on the green. This guy takes two putts to make par. Second hole is par 3. This guy hits the ball into the lake. The two buddies looks at Dick again and say "You said this guy was good" Dick replies that this guy was a great player. So the guy walks into the the lake. Three minutes later they can''t see the guy. All of a sudden they see a hand come out of the water. They tell Dick to dive in the lake to go get his friend, he''s drowning. Dick replies "No, that means he wants a 5 iron".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your late teeing off, Fred. "Yup, well being Sunday I had to toss a coin to see if I should go to church, or to play golf" "But why are you so late?" "I had to toss for it fifteen times!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Ralph meet on the golf course and decide to finish off the round together. Bill has a little dog with him and on the next green, when Bill holes out with a 20 foot putt, the little dog starts yipping and stands up on its hind legs. Ralph is quite amazed at this clever trick of the dog''s and says, "That dog is really talented! What does it do if you miss a putt?" Bill replies, "Somersaults." Ralph exclaims, "Somersaults! How many of them does it do?" Bill calmly replies, "Mmm, depends on how hard I kick it up the ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9. Well, how ''bout that?...I''m lost! Looks like we''ll have to stop and ask for directions. 8. You know, Pumpkin, now that you''re thirteen, you''ll be ready for unchaperoned car dates. Won''t that be fun? 7. Here''s a credit card and the keys to my new car - GO CRAZY. 6. What do you mean you wanna play football? Figure skating not good enough for you, son? 5. Your mother and I are going away for the weekend...you might want to consider throwing a party. 4. Well, I don''t know what''s wrong with your car. Probably one of those doo-hickey thingies - you know, that makes it run or something. Just have it towed to a mechanic and pay whatever he asks. 3. No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an earring, now quit your belly-aching, and let''s go to the mall. 2. Whaddya wanna go and get a job for? I make plenty of money for you to spend. 1. Father''s Day? Aaahh-don''t worry about that - it''s no big deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I''ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?" "Why?" "Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a guy''s printer type began to grow faint, he called a local repair shop where a friendly man informed him that the printer probably needed only to be cleaned. Because the store charged $50 for such cleanings, he told him he might be better off reading the printer''s manual and trying the job himself. Pleasantly surprised by his candor, he asked, "Does your boss know that you discourage business?" "Actually, it is my boss''s idea," the employee replied sheepishly. "We usually make more money on repairs if we let people try to fix things themselves first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you messed up your life, you could press "Ctrl, Alt, Delete" and start all over! To get your daily exercise, just click on "run"! If you needed a break from life, click on "suspend". Hit "any key" to continue life when ready. To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster. To "add/remove" someone in your life, click settings and control panel. To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings. If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers. When you lose your car keys, click on "find". "Help" with the chores is just a click away. You''d use your diskette to recover from a crash. We could click on "send" and the kids would go to bed immediately. To feel like a new person, click on "refresh". Click on "close" to shut up the kids and spouse. To undo a mistake, click on "back". Is your wardrobe getting old? Click "update". If you don''t like cleaning the litter box, click on "delete".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While my brother-in-law was tapping away on his home computer, his ten-year-old daughter sneaked up behind him. Then she turned and ran into the kitchen, squealing to the rest of the family, "I know Daddy''s password! I know Daddy''s password!" "What is it? her sisters asked eagerly. Proudly she replied, "Asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk, asterisk!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you''re out of the office?" "I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a murder trial, the defense attorney was cross-examining the coroner: Attorney: Before you signed the death certificate, had you taken the pulse? Coroner: No. Attorney: Did you listen to the heart? Coroner: No. Attorney: Did you check for breathing? Coroner: No. Attorney: So, when you signed the death certificate, you weren''t sure the man was dead, were you? Coroner: Well, let me put it this way. The man''s brain was sitting in a jar on my desk. But I guess it''s possible he could be out there practicing law somewhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were walking down the street. One noticed a compact on the sidewalk and leaned down to pick it up. She opened it, looked in the mirror and said, "Hmmm, this person looks familiar." The second blonde said, "Let me look!" The first blonde handed her the compact. The second blonde looked in the mirror and said, "You dummy, it''s me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was tired of being bossed around by his wife, so he went to see a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem and so gave him a book on assertiveness, which he read on the way home. He finished the book by the time he reached his house. The man stormed into the house and walked up to his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said, "From now on, I want you to know that - I - am the man of this house, and my word is law! "I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I''m finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward. "Then, after dinner, you''re going to draw me my bath so I can relax. And, when I''m finished with my bath, guess who''s going to dress me and comb my hair?" His wife replied, "The funeral director."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The fourth-grade teacher had to leave the room for a few minutes. When she returned, she found the children in perfect order. Everybody was sitting absolutely quiet. She was shocked and stunned and said, "I''ve never seen anything like this before. This is wonderful. But, please tell me, what came over all of you? Why are you so well behaved and quiet?" Finally, after much urging, little Sally spoke up and said, "Well, one time you said that if you ever came back and found us quiet, you would drop dead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man called the gorilla exterminator because a gorilla was in the tree in his front yand. When the exterminator came he had a gun, a stick, and a dog. He explained that he would climb the tree and poke the gorilla with the stick until it falls from the tree. "Then my dog will bite his testicles off." The guy suspiciously asked, "What is the gun for?" The exterminator replied, "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla, then you shoot the dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever wondered..... Why Most homes have lots of windows in the house, how ever, more than half of them are usually covered up with blinds so people can''t see you. If blind people can still see kindness in a person. Would they still have the same motto " No Shirt, No pants, No service" in a porn shop. Why on "children''s tylonnel" they put " Do not drive right after you have taken this". Why Many packaged peanut bags will say " May contain traces of peanuts" on them? Will you be smarter if you eat smarties( canadian candy) Will you be dumber if you lift dumb bells AND FINALLY..... Will you be able to figure out how long you slept if you bring a ruler to bed with you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re fat. can you still disapear into thin air? If you''re fat, can you still have slim chances of doing something?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe walks out of a bar, swaying back and forth with a key in his hand. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches. "Can I help you, fella?" asks the cop. "Yes! Somebody stole my car!" Joe replies. The cop asks, "Okay, where was your car the last time you saw it?" "It was at the end of this key!" Joe replies. At this point, the cop looks down and sees Joe''s penis hanging out of his trousers. So he asks Joe, "Hey buddy, are you aware that you''re exposing yourself?" Joe looks down sadly and moans, "Oh God.... they got my girlfriend too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between yo mamma and a water buffalo? About 20 pounds! How do you even out the difference? Either force feed the buffalo or shave your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if: 1) You drive your house and sleep in your car. 2) You think a loaded dishwasher means your wife is drunk. 3) You have more than 2 relatives named Buh Buh. 4) You let your 12 year old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of HER kids. 5) You''ve been to a wedding reception at the waffle house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done, and Everybody was asked to do it. Everybody was sure Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody''s job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn''t do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Know You''ve Turned Into a Mom When... You automatically double-knot everything you tie. You find yourself humming the Barney song as you do the dishes. You hear a baby cry in the grocery store, and you start to gently sway back and forth, back and forth. However, your children are at school! You actually start to like the smell of strained carrots mixed with applesauce. You weep through the scene in Dumbo when his mom is taken away, not to mention what Bambi does to you. You get soooo into crafts you contemplate writing a book called 101 Fun Crafts to do with Dryer Lint and Eggshells. You spend a half hour searching for your sunglasses only to have your teenager say, "Mom, why don''t you wear the ones you pushed up on your head?" You are out for a nice romantic meal with your husband, enjoying some real adult conversation, when suddenly you realize that you''ve reached over and started to cut up his steak!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Grandmother was surprised by her 7 year old grandson one morning when he had made her coffee. She drank what was the worst cup of coffee in her life. When she got to the bottom there were three of those little green army men in the cup. She said, "Honey, what are the army men doing in my coffee?" Her grandson said, "Grandma, it says on TV-''The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police Chief: As a recruit, you''ll be faced with some difficult issues. What would you do if you had to arrest your mother? New Recruit: Call for backup!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer," the man began, "I can explain." "Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I''m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back." "But, officer, I just wanted to say," "And I said to keep quiet! You''re going to jail!" A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief''s at his daughter''s wedding... He''ll be in a good mood when he gets back." "Don''t count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I''m the groom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ''There''s Jennifer; she''s a lawyer,'' or ''That''s Michael, he''s a doctor.''" A small voice from the back of the room rang out, "And there''s the teacher; she''s still old, nasty, and wrinkled"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One spring afternoon, I came home to find two little girls on the steps of my building. Both were crying hard, shedding big tears. Thinking they might be hurt, I dropped my briefcase and quickly went over to them. "Are you all right?" I asked. Still sobbing, one held up her doll. "My baby''s arm came off," she said. I took the doll and its disjointed arm. After a little effort and luck, the doll was again whole. "Thank you." came a whisper. Next, looking into the tearful eyes of her friend, I asked, "And what''s the matter with you, young lady?" She wiped her cheeks. "I was helping her cry," she said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock Knock. Who''s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock Knock. Who''s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock Knock. Who''s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock Knock. Who''s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn''t say banana!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 How do you fit an elephant into your fridge within 3 steps? 2 How do you fit a zebra in your fridge? 3 King of the jungle , the lion every animal in the jungle will come to his wedding but one animal won''t which one is it? 4 A man needs to get to the other side of a bridge desperately there are killer alligators that live in the river and there is no boat how do you get across?? 1. step 1- open the fridge. step 2- put elephant in the fridge. step 3- close the fridge. 2. step 1- open the fridge. step 2- take the elephant out. step 3- put the zebra in. step 4- close the fridge. 3. The zebra because it is in the fridge. 4. Swim because the alligators are at the wedding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so fat when she sat on a jelly bean it got lost between her butt and her backbone, and we have been looking for it still for 31 years.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a girls track team and a tribe of pygmies? A: The pygmies are cunning little runts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call 4 blondes standing side-by-side? A: A wind tunnel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are 10 ways to tell if you have PMS, 1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem. 2. You''re adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet. 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans. 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say. 5. You''re using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says, "How''s my driving - call 1-800-***-****." 6. Everyone''s head looks like an invitation to batting practice. 7. You''re convinced there''s a God and he''s male. 8. You''re counting down the days until menopause. 9. You''re sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy. 10. The Motrin bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a bear who''s into gardening? A Hairy Potter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you turn a blonde into a brunette? Make her do a cartwheel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So you want a day off. Let''s take a look at what you are asking for. There are 365 days per year available for work. There are 52 weeks per year in which you already have 2 days off per week, leaving 261 days available for work. Since you spend 16 hours each day away from work, you have used up 170 days, leaving only 91 days available. You spend 30 minutes each day on coffee breaks, which counts for 23 days each year, leaving only 68 days available. With a 1 hour lunch each day, you used up another 46 days, leaving only 22 days available for work. You normally spend 2 days per year on sick leave. This leaves you only 20 days per year available for work. We are off 5 holidays per year, so your available working time is down to 15 days. We generously give 14 days vacation per year which leaves only 1 day available for work and I''ll be damned if you are going to take that day off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abraham Lincoln, Bill Clinton, and George Washington were all on an airplane looking out the door. George Washington says, " I''m going to make somebody happy" then throws a $20 out of the plane. Bill Clinton says, "I''m going to make two people happy" then throws 2 $20''s out of the plane. Abraham Lincoln says "I''m going to make everybody happy" and throws Bill Clinton out of the plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Middle Age: when knees buckle and belts don''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Navy dentist''s licence plate: TOP GUM', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Poise: the ability to continue speaking fluently while the other fellow is picking up the cheque.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man noted for his tact was awakened one morning at four o''clock by his ringing telephone. "Your dog''s barking, and it''s keeping me awake," said an irate voice. The man thanked his caller and politely asked his name before hanging up. The next morning at four o''clock, he called his neighbour back. "Sir," he said, "I don''t have a dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After giving a woman a full medical examination, the doctor explained his prescription as he wrote it out. "When you get up, take the green pill with a glass of water. Take the blue pill with a glass of water after lunch. Then just before going to bed, take the red pill with another glass of water." "Exactly what is my problem, Doctor?" the woman asked. "You''re not drinking enough water."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God: "Whew! I just created a 24-hour period of alternating light and darkness on Earth." Angel: "What are you going to do now?" God: "Call it a day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many managers does it take to change a light bulb? A: We''ve formed a task force to study the problem of why light bulbs burn out and to figure out what, exactly, we as supervisors can do to make the bulbs work smarter, not harder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many shipping department personnel does it take to change a light bulb? A: We can change the bulb in seven to ten working days, but if you call before 2 p.m. and pay an extra $15, we can get it changed overnight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many management information services guys does it take to change a light bulb? A: MIS has received your request concerning your hardware problem and has assigned you request number 39712. Please use this number for any future reference to the light bulb issue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A six-year-old comes crying to his mother because his little sister pulled his hair. "Don''t be angry at your sister," the mother says. "She doesn''t realize that pulling hair hurts." A short while later, there''s more crying, and the mother goes to investigate. This time the sister is bawling, and her brother says, "Now she knows."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee, and a l lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single." The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was equally intrigued by the derelict''s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said, "Well, you know what, you''re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?" The drunk replied, "Cause you''re ugly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfriends, and she will write a poem titled ''All Men Are Idiots.'' Then she will get on with her life. A male has a little more trouble letting go. Six months after the breakup, at 3 am on a Sunday morning, he will call and say, "I just wanted to let you know you ruined my life, and I''ll never forgive you, and hate you, and you''re a total floozy. But I want you to know that there''s always a chance for us." This is known as the ''I Hate You, I Love You'' drunken phone call and 99 percent of all men have made it at least once. There are community colleges that offer courses to help men get over this need', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men''s magazines often feature pictures of naked women. Women''s magazines also feature pictures of naked women. This is because the female body is a beautiful work of art, while the male body is lumpy and hairy and should not be seen by the light of day. Men are turned on at the sight of a naked woman''s body. Most naked men elicit laughter from women.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honey, said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn''t go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don''t feel like cooking a fancy meal!" "I know all that." "Then why did you invite a friend for supper?" "Because the poor fool''s thinking about getting married."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father and son went hunting together for the first time. The father said "Stay here and be VERY QUIET. I''ll be across the field." A few minutes later the father heard a blood curdling scream and ran back to his son asking "What''s wrong? I told you to be quiet." The son answered, "Look, I was quiet when the snake slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my neck. But when the two chipmunks crawled up my pant legs and said "Should we eat them here or take them with us?" I panicked...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Height of Patience: A naked woman lying down with her legs apart under a banana tree. Height of Frustration: A boxer trying to scratch his balls. Height of Innocence: A teenage girl applying Clearasil to her nipples. Height of Laziness: A guy lying on a girl and waiting for an earthquake to do the rest. Height of Competition: A guy peeing beside a waterfall. Height of Sophistication: Sucking nipples with a straw. Height of Disgust: While wiping after a good toilet dump, your finger pokes through the paper. Height of Technology: A condom with a zip. Height of Trouble: A one handed man hanging from a cliff and his arse is itching.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mummy, Mummy. I was at the playground and Daddy... Mummy tells him to slow down. She wants to hear the story, so Little Johnny tells her. "I was at the playground and I saw Daddy''s car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt, then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane laid down on the seat, then Daddy..." At this point Mummy cut him off and says, "Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the rest of it for suppertime. I want to see the look on Daddy''s face when you tell it tonight." At the dinner table, Mummy asks Little Johnny to tell his story. Johnny starts his story, describing the car going into the woods, the undressing, laying down on the seat and "... then Daddy and Aunt Jane did that same thing Mummy and Uncle Bill used to do when Daddy was in the Navy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The ten things a guy knows about a girl: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. They have boobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been known about the town, and on this very special occasion, a local newspaper reporter paid them a visit. He inquired as to the secret of their long and happy marriage. "Well"...explained the husband..."it all goes all the way back to our honeymoon, you see, we visited the Grand Canyon and we took a trip down to the bottom of the canyon by pack mule." He continues..."well now, we hadn''t gone too far when my wife''s mule stumbled, she quietly said...that''s once." "We proceeded a little further when the mule stumbled again and my wife quietly spoke...that''s twice." "You know, that mule hadn''t gone a half-mile when it stumbled a third time." My wife promptly removed a gun from her purse, hopped off the beast, and shot the mule dead." "I protested over her treatment of the mule, she slowly turned to me and quietly said...that''s once."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A six year old goes to the hospital with his grandma to visit his grandpa. When they get to the hospital, he runs ahead of his grandma and bursts into his grampa''s room. "Grampa, Grampa," he says excitedly, "as soon as grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a frog!" "What?" said his grandpa. "Make a noise like a frog because grandma said that as soon as you croaked, we''re going to Disneyland!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of kindergartners were trying to become accustomed to the first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on no baby talk. "You need to use ''big people'' words," she''d always remind them. She asked Chris what he had done over the weekend. "I went to visit my Nana." "No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use big people words!" She then asked Mitchell what he had done. "I took a ride on a choo-choo." She said, "No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. Use big people words." She then asked Bobby what he had done. "I read a book," he replied. "That''s WONDERFUL!" the teacher said. "What book did you read?" Bobby thought about it, then puffed out his little chest with great pride and said, "Winnie the Shit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Marla decided that the only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon quickie with their 10-year-old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony and order him to report on all the neighborhood activities. The boy began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation. "There''s a car being towed from the parking lot," he said. "An ambulance just drove by." A few moments passed. "Looks like the Anderson''s have company," he called out. "Matt`s riding a new bike and the Coopers are having sex." Mom and dad shot up in bed. "How do you know that?" the startled father asked. "Their kid is standing out on the balcony too," his son replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code" to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting their children in on it. They decided on the word Typewriter. One day the husband told his five year old daughter, "Go tell your mommy that daddy needs to type a letter". The child told her mother what her dad said, and her mom responded, "Tell your daddy that he can''t type a letter right now cause there is a red ribbon in the typewriter." The child went back to tell her father what mommy said. A few days later the mom told the daughter, "Tell daddy that he can type that letter now." The child told her father, returned to her mother and announced, "Daddy said never mind with the typewriter, he already wrote the letter by hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs to her class. She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to accumulate the building materials for his home. She read, "...And so the pig went up to the man with the wheelbarrow full of straw and said, ''Pardon me sir, but may I have some of that straw to build my house?''" The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that man said?" One little boy raised his hand and said, "I know"..he said ''Holy Shit! A talking pig!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith, the Sunday School teacher, smiling sweetly said, "Bobby, when I was a child I was told if that I made ugly an face, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Bobby looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Smith, you can''t say you weren''t warned."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heard over the hospital public address system: Due to a mix up in Urology, no apple juice will be served this morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When ice skating, never judge a brook by its cover.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children certainly brighten up a home. Who ever saw a child under 12 turn off an electric light?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American supply teacher came to a Canadian class one day. She told the students that she was an American and she asked if anyone else in the room was an American. Even though not many people in the room were, everyone put up their hand not to be left out, except one girl. The teacher stared at the girl and asked "If you''re not an American, then what are you?" The girl replied, "I''m a proud Canadian." The teacher asked "Why are you a Canadian?" The girl answered, "Because my parents are both Canadians." The teacher asked "What if both of your parents are stupid, then what will you be?" The girl answered, "Then I would be an American!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three kids named My, Butt, and Stupid. They were pretty dumb and didn''t know the word and. One day, they were playing ball on the sixth floor. Then, suddenly Stupid dropped the ball out the window. My jumped out the window to get the ball, while Butt tried to jump out the window to catch My. Stupid saw that the two of them fall out the window and ran down the stairs. When he got down, he saw a policeman looking at My and Butt. The policeman asked "Son, what is your name?" Stupid answered "I''m Stupid!" The policeman said "You''re not stupid, son, now do you know what happened here?" Stupid answered "My Butt fell out the window!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a grieving relative came to a grave yard to talk to the grave digger. The woman said to him "I am very poor, and I don''t know how I can pay for my husband to be buried!" The grave digger replied "No problem, I have ways for you to save money while having your husband buried." "How?" The woman asked. "It''s very simple," the grave digger replied. "To save money on the coffin, all you do is put your husband''s body in a large plastic bag, instead of a coffin. To save money on space of the burial, bury your husband standing up instead of laying down. To save money on the headstone, all you need to do to identify your husband is to bury only half of his body and leave his head and half of his body above groud. This also saves money and labour of me digging a whole grave!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you see peas spinning in circles? World Peace (whirled peas)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A genetic scientist managed to create dolphins that would live to 250 years of age - if they were fed seagulls. One day the scientist''s supply of gulls ran out, so he went out to trap some more. On the way back, he came upon two sleeping lions. Not wanting to wake the big cats, he gingerly stepped over them and was promptly arrested for... Transporting gulls across sedate lions for immortal porpoises!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a girl at a restaurant and ordered anything in a saucer. The waiter was walking to her table when the girl tripped him. The waiter said "Why did you trip me?" And the girl, without the least of the waiter''s worries simply said "I wanted to see a flying saucer!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot? Maybe someday we''ll find Bigfoot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat she''s got a real horse on her polo shirt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('R. B. Jones had just started a government job. Human Resources sent him a letter, instructing him that they needed his full name for their records, otherwise he could not be paid. They enclosed the proper form for him to fill out. R.B. wrote back to explain that he HAS no other names, only the initials R.B. So he filled in the form as follows: First name: R (only) Middle name: B (only) Last name: Jones Sure enough, come payday, R.B. received a pay cheque made out to Ronly Bonly Jones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a mom and a dad , they had a daughter called Angelica. So the dad was very thirsty because he had been driving a lot, so he asked his daughter "sweetheart can I have some of your juice?" She answers "daddy no drinking and driving, that''s what the law says!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Great Chicken Recipe: When I found this recipe I thought it was perfect for those who just are not sure how to tell when poultry is cooked thoroughly but not dried out. Give this a try. Baked Stuffed Chicken 2-3 kg chicken 1 cup melted butter 1 cup stuffing 1 cup uncooked popcorn salt & pepper to taste Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush chicken well with melted butter, salt and pepper. Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn. Place in baking pan in the oven. Listen for the popping sounds. When the chicken''s ass blows out of the oven door and flies across the room, the chicken is done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was on a plane when the stranger in the next seat said, "Let''s talk. Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passengers." Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to the stranger, "What would you like to discuss?" The stranger said, "How about nuclear power?" Johnny said, "That could be interesting. But first, I have a question. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same thing, grass. Yet a deer excretes pellets, while a cow excretes a flat patty, and a horse excretes clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?" The stranger said, "I have no idea." Johnny said, "Well, then, why do you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don''t know shit?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Visitor : "Knock knock?" Worker: "Who''s there?" Visitor : "Doughnut Man." Worker: "Doughnut Man who?" Visitor : "For the last time, do not (doughnut) bother me with your useless ''Knock-Knock'' jokes!" Worker: "But you started it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there Who Who who I don''t know what the heck your talking about but good owl impression.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blonde which is as sweet as a pickle and has dirty blonde hair? A sweet potatoe!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women met for the first time since graduating from high school. One asked the other, "You were always so organized in school. Did you manage to live a well planned life?" "Yes," said her friend. "My first marriage was to a millionaire; my second marriage was to an actor; my third marriage was to a preacher; and now I''m married to an undertaker." Her friend asked, "What do those marriages have to do with a well planned life?" "One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three ministers were talking about their common problem with bats in the belfry of the church. The first minister said, "I shot at them with a shotgun, but it only spoiled the woodwork." The second said, "I tried a more humane approach, netting them and releasing them 100 Km away. But they beat me back to the church!" The third (who was looking pretty smug) said, "I caught them, and baptized and confirmed each one. I haven''t seen them since."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are fingers on the statue of liberty 11 inches long? A: Because if they were 12 inches they would be feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock?? who''s there? Hatch Hatch-who? Bless you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who''s Bigger? Mr. Bigger or Mr. Bigger''s baby? His baby cause he is a little Bigger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Cinderella kicked off the basketball team? She kept running away from the ball!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock KnocK??? Who''s there? Ya Ya who? Where did that cowboy come from??', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a man becomes president, his wife is the first lady. If a woman became president, what would you call her husband? Whipped.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three blondes in the forest and they saw some tracks. The first blonde said, "Look, bear tracks." The second blonde said, "No, stupid, those are wolf tracks." The third blonde said, "You''re both wrong, those are rabbit tracks." Then the train came and ran them all over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother, "There were two boy kittens and two girl kittens." "How did you know?" his mother asked. Daddy picked them up and looked underneath, he replied, "I think it''s printed on the bottom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Duke is hunting in a forest with his men-at-arms and servants when he comes upon a tree. Archery targets are painted all over it, and smack in the middle of each is an arrow. "Who is this incredibly fine archer?" cries the Duke. "I must find him." After continuing through the forest for a few miles, he comes across a small boy carrying a bow and arrow. Eventually the boy admits that it was he who shot the arrows plumb in the center of all the targets. "You didn''t just walk up to the targets and hammer the arrows into the middle, did you?" asks the Duke worriedly. "No my lord. I shot them from 100 paces. I swear it by all that I hold holy." "That is truly astonishing," says the Duke. "I hereby admit you into my service, but I must ask one favor in return. You must tell me how you came to be such an outstanding shot." "Well," said the boy, "first I fire the arrow at the tree, and then I paint the target around it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Husband and Wife go to the hospital to deliver their child. The doctor meets them and tells them that he has a new system that will allow the father to take part or all of the mothers labor pains. They both agree and the delivery begins. The doctor turns the dial to 10%, so that the father will take 10% of the mothers pain. The husband says he feels fine, so the doctor puts it up a notch. The husband still feels fine, so the doctor puts it up to 30%. The husband still feels fine, so it goes up to 50%. The husband tells the doctor to go ahead and put it up to 100%. The husband still feels fine and the child is delivered and the wife felt virtually no pain at all. They both go back home with their child, where they find the mailman dead on their steps!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He who laughs last, thinks slowest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a boy and a teacher walking down the street one day. The teacher bought the boy some gum and after chewing it for a while it fell out of his mouth. He went to pick it up and the teacher said, "Never pick up things from the floor." Then, the teacher bought him an ice cream. It fell on the floor and he went to pick it up. Again, the teacher said to him, "Never pick up things from the floor." Next, the teacher bought the boy a lollypop. It fell to the floor and once again he went to pick it up. The teacher told him, "Never pick up things from the floor." After walking down the street some more there was a ditch ahead, but neither the boy nor the teacher noticed it. As they walked on the teacher fell in and started yelling at the boy, "Help me! Help me! The boy just looked down at her and said, "Never pick up things from the floor..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Emily was complaining to her mother that her stomach hurt. Her mother replied, "That''s because it''s empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it." The next day, the pastor was over at Emily''s family''s house for lunch. He mentioned having his head hurt, to which Emily immediately replied, "That''s because it''s empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?" HUSBAND: "Definitely not!" WIFE: "Why not - don''t you like being married?" HUSBAND: "Of course I do." WIFE: "Then why wouldn''t you remarry?" HUSBAND: "Okay, I''d get married again." WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)." HUSBAND: (makes audible groan). WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?" HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?" WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?" HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do." WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?" HUSBAND: "No, she''s left-handed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. She brought in a variety of lifesavers and said, "Children, I would like you to close your eyes and taste these." The kids easily identified the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher gave them honey-flavored lifesavers, all of the kids were stumped. "I''ll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It''s something your daddy and mommy probably call each other all of the time." Instantly, one of the kids coughed his onto the floor and shouted, "Spit ''em out, guys; they''re assholes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, "Get me a beer before it starts!" The wife sighs and gets him a beer. Ten minutes later, he says, "Get me another beer before it starts!" She looks cross, but fetches another beer and slams it down next to him. He finishes that beer and a few minutes later says, "Quick, get me another beer, it''s going to start any minute!" The wife is furious. She yells at him "Is that all you''re going to do tonight? Drink beer and sit in front of that TV? You''re nothing but a lazy, drunken, fat slob, and furthermore..." The man sighs and says, "It''s started..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Michael Jackson cover his body in cheese spread? Because kids will do anything for the taste of Dairylee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For all you Blonde ladies out there. Why are blonde jokes so short? So men can remember them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blond who can change a lightbulb? Talented', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a man who put the toilet seat down after use? Don''t know it''s never happened.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One I hope.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people grow old gracefully, while others fight and scratch the whole way. Andy''s wife, refusing to give in to the looks of growing old, goes out and buys a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she asks her husband - "Darling, honestly, if you didn''t know me, what age would you say I am?" Looking over her carefully, Andy replied,... "Judging from your skin, twenty; your hair, eighteen; and your figure, twenty five." "Oh, you flatterer!" she gushed. Just as she was about to tell Andy his reward, he stops her by saying... "WHOA, hold on there sweety!" Andy interrupted. "I haven''t added them up yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I went to lunch today, I noticed this lady about 75-80 years old sitting on a bench near the food court and she was sobbing her eyes out. I stopped and asked her what was wrong. She said: "I have a 22-year-old husband at home. He makes love to me every morning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, sausage, fresh fruit and freshly ground, brewed coffee." I said: "Well, then why are you crying?" She said: "He makes me homemade soup for lunch and my favorite brownies and then makes love to me half the afternoon." I said: "Well, so why are you crying?" She said: "For dinner he makes me a gourmet meal with wine and my favorite desert and then makes love to me until 2:00am." I said: "Well, why in the world would you be crying?" She said: "BECAUSE I CAN''T REMEMBER WHERE I LIVE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All the good knights were leaving for the Crusades. One knight told his best friend - "My bride is without doubt one of the most beautiful women in the world. It would be a terrible waste if no man could have her. Therefore, as my best and most trusted friend, I am leaving you the key to her chastity belt to use should I not return from the Crusade." The company of knights were only a mile or so out of town when they noticed a cloud of dust approaching. Thinking it might be an important message from the town the column halted. A horseman approached. It was the knight''s best friend. He yells - "Hey, you gave me the wrong key!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Ford and a golf ball? You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is an old lady driving on Interstate 22. A police car pulls her over and explains to the lady she is going 22 mph. She said, ''''I know, isn''t that the speed limit?" The officer said, ''''No, this is Interstate 22''''. The police officer looks in the back seat and there are three children looking quite ill. He asks her if they need help and she explains, ''''No, we just left Interstate 119."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Marine stationed in Afghanistan recently received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend back home. It read as follows: Dear Ricky, I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since you''ve been gone, and it''s not fair to either of us. I''m sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you. Love, Becky. The Marine, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow Marines for any snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex-girlfriends, aunts, cousins etc. In addition to the picture of Becky, Ricky included all the other pictures of the pretty gals he had collected from his buddies. There were 57 photos in that envelope....along with this note: Dear Becky, I''m so sorry, but I can''t quite remember who you are. Please take your picture from the pile, and send the rest back to me. Take care, Ricky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Susan went straight to her grandparent''s house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her. When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning." Horrified, Susan told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble. "Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding, and out on the Dong." She paused, wiped away a tear and then continued, "and if that damned ice cream truck hadn''t come along, he''d still be alive today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister was opening his mail one morning. Drawing a single sheet of paper from an envelope, he found written on it only one word: "FOOL." The next Sunday he announced, "I have known many people who have written letters and forgot to sign their names. But this week I received a letter from someone who signed his name and had forgotten to write a letter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The local high school has a policy that the parents must call the school if the student is to be absent for the day. Kelly, deciding to bunk and go to the mall with her friends waited till her parent''s had left for work and called the school herself. This is the actual conversation of the telephone call. Kelly: "Hi, I''m calling to report that Kelly so-and-so is unable to make it to school today because she is ill. Secretary at high school: "Oh, I''m sorry to hear that. I''ll note her absence. Who is this calling?" Kelly: "This is my mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you. - No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy. - Friendly fire ain''t. - The most dangerous thing in the combat zone is an officer with a map. - The problem with taking the easy way out is that t', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many FBI agents does it take to change a light bulb? A: I''m afraid that you are not able to receive this classified information.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Licensed Counselor was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children... "You all have obsessions," he observed. To the first mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You''ve even named your daughter Candy." He turned to the second Mom. "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child''s name, Penny." He turns to the third Mom. "Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child''s name, Brandy." At this point, the fourth mother gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers, "Come on, Dick, we''re leaving."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink. As the bartender set it down, he asked, "Going to a party?" ''Yeah,'' the man answered, ''I''m supposed to come dressed as my love life.'' ''But you look like Abe Lincoln.'' protested the barkeep. ''That''s right. My last four scores were seven years ago.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Nice Set of Floppies! - Hey, how ''bout I take off your cover and insert a bigger CPU. - I''d like to play on your laptop. - Need me to unzip your files? - If you were an ISP, I''d dial you all day long! - I''d like to boot up your PC! - I''ll bet my hard dr', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, this guy, Bill is sitting in a bar and pulls out this tiny little piano and a little guy about a foot tall. The little guy sits down and starts playing the piano quite beautifully. The fellow on the next bar stool, Joe, says ''That''s amazing. Where did you get him?'' Bill answers ''well, I got this magic lamp with a genie.'' So Joe asks ''that''s great, could I use it?'' Bill says ''sure '' and hands him the lamp. Joe rubs the lamp and out comes the genie. He continued, ''I want a million bucks''. Suddenly the room is entirely filled with quacking ducks! Joe exclaims ''Hey! I asked for 1 million BUCKS! Not DUCKS!'' Bill explained. ''Yes, the genie is a bit deaf. You don''t think I really asked for a twelve inch pianist do you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you''ll have lost at least 5 pounds." When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that''s amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?" The blonde nodded, "I''ll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that 3rd day." "From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor. "No, from all that skipping."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonde jokes started when a brunette and a red head had to much time on their hands, because a blond was out with their boyfriends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish girl tells her Catholic college roommate that she''s going home for Roshashanna. "Oh," the Catholic girl says. "That''s the holiday when you light the eight candles, right?" "No," the Jewish girl replies. "That''s Hannukah." "Oh, right," the Catholic girl says. "Roshashanna is the holiday when you eat the unlevened bread?" "No," the Jewish girl replies. "That''s Passover. Roshashanna is the holiday when we blow the shofar." "See," the Catholic girl says. "That''s what I like about you Jews...you''re so good to the help."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A length of Rope went into a bar, sat on a stool, and ordered a beer. The Bartender said, "We don''t serve Ropes here." Dismayed and disappointed, the Rope went out and then got an idea. He stopped a man and asked, "Will you please tie a knot in me and separate my strands at both ends?". The man obliged, and with this done, the Rope went back into the bar and again ordered a beer. The Bartender looked him over and said, "Say, aren''t you the same rope who was in here before?!" "No," was the reply, "I''m a frayed knot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill walked into his favorite dive bar, took his regular stool, looked around, and asked Louie, the bartender, "Where''s Beverly, the waitress?" "She''s dead," replied the bartender. "Dead?" asked Bill. "She died from herpes," said the bartender. Bill replied, "You don''t die from herpes." "You do if you give it to Big Louie!" said the bartender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sat at a bar, drinking slowly. On his face was the saddest hangdog expression. The bartender asked, "What''s the matter? Are you having troubles with your wife?" The man said, "We had a fight, and she told me that she wasn''t going to speak to me for a month." The bartender said, "That should make you happy." The man sadly shook his head and said, "Not when the month is up today!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four business men are flying over the the UK having tea and taking in the sites The first man who is English looks out of the window and cries "Ah there is my beautiful England" A while later the second man who is Irish looks out and criess "There is my beautiful Ireland" A while after that the Third man looks out and criess "There is my beautiful Scotland" The fourth man who is Chinese feels very left out. He comes up with an idea. Picking up the tea set they have been using, he tosses it out of the window and cries "Ah my beautiful China"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: A mosquito will stop sucking when you smack it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bowling teams, one of all blondes and one of all brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City. The brunette team rides in the bottom of the bus; the blonde team rides on the top level.. The brunette team down below is whooping it up having a great time, when one of them realizes she doesn''t hear anything from the blondes upstairs. She decides to go up and investigate. When the brunette reaches the top, she finds all the blondes frozen in fear, staring straight ahead at the road, and clutching the seats in front of them with white knuckles.. She says, "What the heck''s goin'' on up here? We''re havin'' a grand time downstairs!" One of the blondes looks up and says, "Yeah, but you''ve got a driver!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the channels and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the woman ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps put her face in her hands and moaned, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in the 3rd grade. Who has the biggest tits? A: The blonde because she is 18.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you tell when a blonde has been driving your car? A: There is lipstick on the steering wheel from her blowing the horn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde''s house is on fire so she runs outside to use a payphone to call for help. She gets the 911 operator, and gets transferred to the firehouse. "Mr. Fireman, my house is on fire, you have to help me!" The Fireman replies, "Yes, yes, Miss, how do I get to your house?" The blonde pauses a moment, and replies, "Umm, it''s the house that''s on fire." Realizing he is now talking to a blonde, the fireman comes back with, "No, Miss, how would you like me to get to your house?" to which the blonde replies, "Duh, big red truck!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The executive was interviewing a young blonde for a position in his company. He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, "If you could have a conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?" The blonde quickly responded, "The living one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do blondes wear panties? A. To keep their ankles warm!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What are the worst six years in a blonde''s life? A: Fourth grade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. "Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked. "To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. "What''s the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving up?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between Snowmen and Snowwomen? A: Snowballs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineering student was walking across campus when another engineer rides up on a shiny new motorcycle. "Where did you get such a great bike?", asked the first. The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said ''Take what you want.''" The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn''t have fit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was out, driving happily along in his car late one Saturday night. Before too long, a cop pulled him over. The policeman walked up to the man and asked, "Have you been drinking, sir?" "Why? Was I weaving all over the road?" "No," replied the policeman, "you were driving splendidly. It was the really ugly girl in the passenger seat that gave you away."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Farmer John was taking his cow and it''s newborn calf to sell in the auction. On the way farmer John got robbed by thieves, who beat him up, stripped him of his clothes and tied him to a tree. Then taking the mother cow and John''s clothes, the thieves escaped. They, however, left the newborn calf behind. Poor farmer John suffered as for two days, he stood tied to a tree, stark naked and hungry. Fortunately, on the third day, some neighbors happened to pass by. They recognized John and untied him. When they did, farmer John picked up a long stick and started whipping the calf with it. ''Why are you thrashing the poor calf?'' his neighbors asked? To which farmer John replied, ''I had to tell this beast for the past two days repeatedly...I am NOT your mother! I am NOT your mother!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy dials his home phone from work. A strange woman answers. The guy says, "Who is this?" "This is the maid.", answered the woman. "We don''t have a maid!" "I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house." "Well, this is her husband. Is she there?" "Ummm .... she''s upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I just figured was her husband." The guy is fuming. He says to the maid, "Listen, would you like to make $50,000?" "What do I have to do?" "I want you to get my gun from my desk in the den and shoot that witch and the jerk she is with." The maid puts down the phone. The guy hears footsteps, followed by two gunshots. The maid comes back to the phone. "What should I do with the bodies?" "Throw them in the swimming pool!" "What?! There''s no pool here?" Long pause... "Uh .... is this 832-4821?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat you make sumos look anorexic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat Richard Simmons laughs at you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a little guy in a bar drinking his beer, when all of a sudden a big guy comes and knocks him off his stool and says "that was a karate chop from Japan" The little guy get''s back up on his stool again and start''s to drink his beer again, when all of a sudden the big guy knock''s him of his stool again, and says that was a karate kick from China, So the little guy get''s back up and leave''s for a moment then come''s back in and goes up to the big guy hits him and knock''s him off of his stool out cold.... he then, tell''s the bartender "when he gets up to ask me, that was a crowbar from Sears"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blonde and a brunette were talking on the phone. Then the brunette says, " I have to go get a new mouse for the computer. My mouse isn''t running good." Since the blonde hates mice. she goes over to her computer and opens it up, looking for a running mouse. She runs back to the phone and says, " But my computer works fine without a mouse"; but since she took so long looking for the mouse, her friend hung up and the phone battery was dying out so it sounded like a squeeky assuming and it was the mouse she searched her whole house finding not one mouse. Then she calls her brunette on the phone saying I can''t find one mouse in my house what does it look like? After she finished describing it the blonde finds it, then she squishes it saying, " There, it is dead! "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you think fast-food is hitting a dear at 65mph.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two crisps are walking down the road when a car pulls up alongside and the driver leans out and says "Do you fancy a lift?". The crisps reply, "No thanks we''re Walkers".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police officer: "Excuse me, but your dog has been chasing a man on his bicycle". Dog owner: "Are you crazy? My dog can''t even ride a bicycle".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attending the funeral of an actress who had been married ten times, a friend sobbed to the priest, "Well, at least they''re together at last." The clergyman looked around. "Which of her husbands is buried here?" "None," said the friend. "I meant, her legs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.What is the speed limit for sex? A. 68, at 69 you have to turn around!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After Great Britain''s Beer Festival, all the brewery presidents decided it would be fun to hit a pub in London and go out for a beer. The first sits down and says, "Hey, Senor, I would like the world''s best beer, a Corona." The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him. The second says, "I''d like the best beer in the world. Give me ''The King of Beers.'' One Budweiser please." The bartender gives him one. Another guy says, "I''d like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water; give me a Coors." The bartender gives him one. The guy from Guiness sits down as he orders a Coke. The bartender is a bit taken aback, but gives him what he ordered. The other presidents look over at him and ask, "Why aren''t you drinking a Guiness?" The Guiness president replies, "Well, if you guys aren''t drinking beer, neither will I."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You see a fabulous girl/guy at a party. You approach them and say, "I''m fantastic in bed." That''s Direct Marketing. You''re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a fabulous girl/guy. You have one of your friends approach them, point at you and say, "She''s/he''s fantastic in bed." That''s Advertising. You see a fabulous girl/guy at a party. You approach them to get their telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I''m fantastic in bed." That''s Telemarketing. You''re at a party and see a fabulous girl/guy. You get up, straighten your clothes, walk up and pour them a drink. You open the door, pick up their bag after it drops, offer them a ride, and then say, "By the way, I''m fantastic in bed." That''s Public Relations. You''re at a party and see a fabulous girl/guy. They walk up to you and say, "I hear you''re fantastic in bed." That''s Brand Recognition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive''s wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, "...and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two doctors opened an office in a small town. They put up a sign reading: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology." The town council was not too happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to: "Hysterias and Posteriors." This was not acceptable either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to: "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids." No go! Next they tried "Catatonics and Colonics" Thumbs down again. Then came, "Manic-Depressives and Anal-Retentives." But is was still not good! So they tried: "Minds and Behinds" "Analysis and Anal Cysts" "Nuts and Butts" "Freaks and Cheeks" "Loons and Moons" "Lost Souls and Ass Holes" None worked. Almost at their wits'' end, the doctors finally came up with a title they thought might be accepted by the council: "Dr Smith and Dr Jones, Odds and Ends." APPROVED!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home with his little daughter, whom he has just taken to work. The little girl asks, "I saw you in your office with your secretary. Why do you call her a doll?" Feeling his wife''s gaze upon him, the man explains, "Well, honey, my secretary is a very hard-working girl. She types like you wouldn''t believe, she knows the computer system and is very efficient." "Oh," says the little girl, "I thought it was because she closed her eyes when you lay her down on the couch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a boss who was told by his boss that he had to get rid of at least one employee. So he narrowed the decision to one of two new employees, Jack or Mary. He then decided to speak to each one privately, and let their reactions help guide his decision. So he called in Jack, explained the situation and, of course, Jack said he didn''t want to lose his job, but he understood the boss''s situation. Then he called in Mary, and said, ''Mary, I''ve got a problem; By the end of the day, I''ve got to lay you or Jack off...'' And Mary says, ''Then you''re gonna have to jack off, buster, I''ve got a headache!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, "Something has just come up. I have the chance to go fishing for a week. It''s the opportunity of a lifetime. We leave right away, so can you pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and especially my blue silk pajamas? I''ll be home in an hour to pick them up." He hurries home, grabs everything and rushes off. A week later he returns. His wife asks, "Did you have a good trip?" "Oh yes, great! But you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas." "Oh no I didn''t. I put them in your tackle box."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three little boys were looking for a summer job. Their preacher needed some people to go around and sell bibles. So the preacher hired two boys without even thinking twice. But he was hesitant about hiring the third boy because he suffered from a speech impediment. So after the first days of work they all met back at the church. The preacher looked at the first boy and asked him, "How many bibles did you sell?" The boy stood up and said, "35." "Is that all you sold?" the preacher asked. "He looked at the second boy and asked him the same thing. The boy said, "75." "That is good," the preacher replied. He didn''t want to ask the third boy but did. The boy with the speech impediment said ''''I-I-I s-s-sold 175.'''' The preacher was amazed and asked the boy how did he sell all of the bibles. He said ''''I-I-I t-t-told them to b-b-buy t-t-them or I will r-r-read it to t-t-them''''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boss (to the new employee): We are very keen on cleanliness. Did you wipe your feet on the mat as you came in? New employee: Yes, sir. Boss: We are also keen on truthfulness. There is no mat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man came back from a long business trip to find that his son had a new $300 mountain bike. "How''d you get that, son?" "By hiking." "Hiking?" "Yeah, every night, Mom''s boss came over and gave me $20 to take a hike."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A baby polar bear goes up to his dad and asks, "Dad, am I pure polar bear?" The dad replies, "Sure you are son. I''m all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear, your mom is all polar bear, and her parents are all polar bear." Still unsure the baby polar bear goes to his mom and asks, "Mom, am I pure polar bear?" She answers, "Of course you are honey. I''m all polar bear, your father is all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear, and his parents are all polar bear." Still not convinced the baby polar bear goes to his grandparents and asks, "Grandmom...Grandpop...am I all polar bear?" His grandmother answers, "Of course you are sweetie. We''re all polar bear, your mother is all polar bear, your father is all polar bear, and his parents are all polar bear. Why do you ask sweetie?" The baby polar bears replies, "Because I''m f-ing freezing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horse and a rabbit are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the rabbit to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The rabbit runs to the farm but the farmer can''t be found. So he drives the farmer''s Mercedes back to the mud hole and ties some rope around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend, the horse, and drives the car forward saving him from sinking! A few days later, the rabbit and horse were playing in the meadow again and the rabbit fell into the mud hole. The rabbit yelled to the horse to go and get some help from the farmer. The horse said, "I think I can stand over the hole!" So he stretched over the width of the hole and said, "Grab for my dick and pull yourself up." The rabbit did and pulled himself to safety. The moral of the story: If you are hung like a horse, you don''t need a Mercedes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl is in line to see Santa. When it''s her turn, she climbs up on Santa''s lap. Santa asks, "What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?" The little girl replies, "I want a Barbie and G.I. Joe." Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says, "I thought Barbie comes with Ken." "No," said the little girl. "She comes with G.I. Joe, she fakes it with Ken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat that she is on both sides of the family!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde, brunette, and a redhead were hiking when they came across a cliff. There was no bridge and they couldn''t think of anyother way to get across so they decided to turn around and go back. Just then a magical fairy appeared and said that they could turn into anything they wanted to help them get across the cliff, all they had to do was run, jump, and say the name of it. The brunette ran and jumped and yelled out, "Eagle," and she soared across the cliff. The redhead ran and jumped then yelled, "Hawk," and flew across to the other side. Then it was the blonde''s turn she ran and jumped. When she was in mid air, she forgot what she was going to say and yelled "O crap!"....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This lonely little boy was sitting at home, and he recently discovered the noises and smells that can emit from his body in the form of a fart. So the bored little boy decided to travel the world looking for the best fart, He went to Canada and realized that the cold temperature caused the farts to be really short. He went to Mexico and realized all the spicy foods caused really uncomfortable farts. All other parts of the world had interesting farts but not what the boy was looking for. Feeling that he failed, the boy went back home after his yearly trips around the world, only to walk in on his mom bending over into an oven attempting to pull a cake out. In the middle of her attempt she ripped the biggest fart in the world, The boy was immediately excited he found the best fart, Which proves the moral of the story HOME IS WHERE THE FART IS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary. The husband yells, "When you die, I''m getting you a headstone that reads, ''Here Lies My Wife -Cold As Ever.''" "Yeah?!" she replies. "When you die, I''m getting you a headstone that reads, ''Here Lies My Husband -Stiff At Last.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 75-year-old woman went to the doctor for a check up. The doctor told her she needed more cardiovascular activity, and recommended that she engage in sexual activity three times a week. A bit embarrassed, she said to the doctor, "Please tell my husband." The doctor went out into the waiting room and told the husband that his wife needed sex three times a week. The 80-year-old husband replied, "Which days?" The doctor answered, "Monday, Wednesday, and Friday would be ideal. The husband said, "I can bring her on Monday and Wednesday, but on Fridays, she''ll have to take the bus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All the little rascals sat down for class, and the teacher decided to start off the day with a spelling quiz. The teacher first asked Darla, "Darla, can you spell dumb?" "D-u-m-b," said Darla The teacher then said, "Can you use it in a sentence?" "Buckwheat is dumb." "Okay, can you spell stupid?" said the teacher. "S-t-u-p-i-d." "Can you use it in a sentence?" "Buckwheat is stupid." "Buckwheat, can you spell dictate?" "D-i-c-t-a-t-e." "Can you use it in a sentence?" "I may be dumb, and I may be stupid, but Darla says my dictate good."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the cafeteria of a Catholic school, the children were lined up for lunch. At the head of the line was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note and she had placed it in front of the apples. The note read: "Take only one, God is watching." Further down the cafeteria line was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies... One of the boys had written a note of his own. The note he placed in front of the cookies read: "Take all you want, God is watching the apples."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pharmacy and asks for a pack of condoms. As soon as he has paid for them, he starts laughing and walks out. The next day, the same performance, with the man walking out laughing, fit to bust. The pharmacist thinks this odd and asks his assistant, if the man returns, to follow him. Sure enough, he comes into the store the next day, repeating his actions once more. The assistant duly follows. Half an hour later, he returns. "So did you follow him?" "Yes, I did." "And...where did he go?" "Over to your house..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I woke up one morning knowing I was going to have a bad day. I went to put on my shirt, but when i picked it up, one of the buttons fell off. When i went to put on my pants the button fell off of them too. I went downstairs to eat my breakfast, my toast fell off the plate. By then i was getting very frustrated. I picked up my brief case, and as you have guessed by now, something fell off. I decided to walk to work. When I got in I told my boss, "I''ve really got to use the bathroom." He said, "Why didn''t you use it at home?" I replied, "Because everything I touched, something fell off so I''m afraid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in a red ferari speeding down a country road being chased by a squad car. They try to lose him by darting into a forest behind a farm. The trio ditch the car and decide to each hide in three burlap sacs on the ground. The cop who was really close on their tail went up to each sac. The cop kicked the first sac and the brunette inside said; "Woof woof" "Oh it''s just a dog." Then he kicked the second sac, Inside that sack the redhead said; "Meow Meow" "Oh, it''s just a kitten. Then the cop went up to the third sac with the blonde inside and kicked it The blonde said "Potato potato"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''The Romance of Leprosy'', E Mackerchar 1949 ''Why bring that up? a guide to seasickness'', J F Montague 1936 ''Penetrating Wagner''s Ring'', John L Di Gaetanao 1978 ''Constipation & our Civilization'', J C Thomson 1943 ''A pictorial book of tongue coating'', Anon 1981 ''A Government committee of Enquiry on the Light metal artificial Leg'', Captain Henery Hulme & Chisholm Baird 1923 ''Daddy was an undertaker'', McDill, McGown & Gassman 1952 ''Amputation Stumps: Their care & after-treatment'', Sir Godfrey Martin Huggins 1918 ''A Study of Masturbation & its reputed Sequelae'', J F W Meagher 1924 ''Sex after Death'', B J Ferrell & D E Frey 1983', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He who laughs last, doesn''t get the joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three kinds of people in this world, those who can count, and those who can not!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vacation begins when dad says. "I know a shortcut"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Energizer Bunny arrested... charged with battery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lottery, a tax on people who can''t do math', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('all generalizations are false', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, and you so poor, she stepped in your house and the tires popped.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eat right, stay fit, die anyway!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('IRS... we''ve got what it takes, to take what you''ve got', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Laugh alone and the world thinks you''re an idiot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DNA, national dyslexic association', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be nice to your kids, they''ll choose your nursing home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No one is listening to you until you make a mistake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dyslexics of the world, untie!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DARE, to keep cops off donuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the other hand, you have different fingers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Save a tree, eat a beaver!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nothing is fool proof to a sufficiently talented fool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I wake up grumpy, other times I let her sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always remember that you are unique, just like everybody else!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always go to other peoples funerals, or they wont come to yours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nobody''s perfect-I''m a nobody.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ask me about my vow of silence..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Courdory pillows--they''re making headlines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is another word for Thesaurus?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The hardness of butter is directly proportional to the softness of bread.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many gay people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 8, one to screw it in, and seven to stand back and say "Fabulous!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man who entered a local paper''s pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Conversations often begin with "Put the gun down, and then we can talk." 9. The school principal has your number on speed-dial. 8. The cat is on Valium. 7. People have trouble understanding your kids, because they learned to speak through clenched teeth. 6. You are trying to get your four-year-old to switch to decaffeinated. 5. The number of jobs held down by family members exceeds the number of people in the family. 4. No one has time to wait for microwave TV dinners. 3. "Family meetings" are often mediated by law enforcement officials. 2. You have to check your kid''s day-timer to see if he can take out the trash. 1. Maxwell House gives you industrial rates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Your boss is always yelling, "I wanna see your ass in here by 8:00!" 2. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan. 3. "I''d love to chip in, but I left my wallet in my pants." 4. To stop those creepy guys in Marketing from looking down your blouse. 5. You want to see if it''s like the dream. 6. So that with a little help from Muzak you can add "Exotic Dancer" to your exaggerated resume. 7. People stop stealing your pens after they''ve seen where you keep them. 8. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk. 9. Gives "bad hair day" a whole new meaning. 10. No one steals your chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Flebs, a teacher, was standing in front of her class. It was the beginning of the new school year. Mrs. Flebs said, "Okay class, we''re going to go around the room and have everybody say a sentence. We''ll start with Sarah." Sarah said, "Cows have spots." Terrence said, ''''Baseball is a sport." Carla said, "Computers are electronic." Bobby said, "Urinate." Mrs. Flebs said, "Bobby, urinate is a word, not a sentence." Bobby said, "Not urinate, it''s you''re an eight. And if you had bigger tits you''d be a ten."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this guy and he had a girlfriend called Lorraine who was very pretty and he liked her a lot. One day he went to work to find that a new girl had started. Her name was Clearly and she was absolutely gorgeous. He became quite besotted with her and after a while it became obvious that she was interested in him too. But this guy was a loyal man and he wouldn''t get involved with Clearly while he was still going out with Lorraine. He decided that there was nothing for it but to break up with her and get it on with the new girl. He planned several times to tell Lorraine but he couldn''t bring himself to do it. One day they went for a walk along the river bank when Lorraine slipped and fell in to the river. The current carried her off and she drowned. The guy stopped for a moment by the river and then ran off singing - "I can see Clearly now Lorraine has gone"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the definition of a sick bird? A: Illegal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Veronica: Nurse, I am losing my hair! Nurse: Okay, what size paper bag do you need?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother: "Why is the bride dressed in white?" "Because white is the color of happiness and today is the happiest day of her life," her mother tried to explain, keeping it simple. The child thought about this for a moment, then said: "So then why is the groom wearing black?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lil boy came down for breakfast one morning and asked his grandma, "Where`s Mom and Dad? " and she replied, "They`re up in bed," so the lil boy started to giggle and ate his breakfast and went out to play. Then he came back in for lunch and asked his grandma "Where`s Mom and Dad?" and she replied, "They`re still up in bed," and the lil boy started to giggle and he ate his lunch and went out to play. Then the lil boy came in for dinner and once again he asked his grandma, "Where`s Mom and Dad?" and his grandmother replied "They`re still up in bed" and the little boy started to laugh and his grandmother asked, "What give''s? Every time I tell you they`re still up in bed you start to laugh! What is going on here?" The little boy replied, "Well last night daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him super glue instead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Her name was Virginia. They called her Virgin for short, but not for long!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And out of the night came the terrible scream, "Who put the sand in the Vaseline!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If my dog was as ugly as your mom, I''d shave its butt and teach it to walk backwards!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde missed a 44 bus so she took the 22 bus twice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A panda walks into a bar and eats lunch. When he is finished he shoots the waiter and leaves. The owner ran after the panda and asked him why he did such and thing. The panda replied, "Look up the word ''panda'' in the dictionary." The owner did so and it read, "Panadas are black and white animals. They eat shoots and leaves."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross a snake and a kangaroo? A: A jump rope', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross a kangaroo and a sheep? A: A sweater with pockets', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All the boys and girls in Mrs. Dovers class are drawing. Mrs. Dover came over to Tommy and said, "What picture are you drawing?" Tommy said, "A cow eating grass." "Ok, where''s the grass?" "The cow ate it all." "Ok, where''s the cow?" "He went to go look for more grass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between two yards? A. Usually a fence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock? Who''s there? Megan Megan who? Makin a list chekin it twice gonna find out who''s naughty or nice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When physics meets Star Wars: May the net force be with you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Q: What would you do if a cheetah charged you? A: Pay him cash. (But don''t worry. He accepts credit cards too.) 2. Q: Who went into the tiger''s lair and came out alive? A: The tiger. 3. Q: If there were ten cats in a boat and one jumped off, how many are still on the boat? A: None- they were all copy cats. 4: Q: What has four legs and two eyes but sees just as well from both ends? A: A tiger with its eyes closed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did piglet look in the toilet? A: He was looking for Pooh (poo)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were 3 tomatoes. A momma tomato, a papa tomato, and a baby tomato. The baby tomato started to fall behind and the papa tomato called over to him and said, "Ketchup!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All lazy peoples'' slogan must be "The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese." But fear not for all of you who wake up early just keep this in mind: The first cat gets the mouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains. She tells the salesman: "I would like to buy a pink curtain that''s the size of my computer screen". The surprised salesman replies: "But, madam, computers do not need curtains...." And the blonde said: "Helloooo.... I''ve got Windows!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Yo da lay he. Yo da lay he who? I didn''t know you could yodel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever. At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said, "I''m sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral ...I''m a gynecologist." At that point, the proctologist fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft''s all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can''t get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I''ve got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, ''''If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow I''d be a little bull.'''' The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid, who continues with, ''''If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant.'''' The kid goes on with several animals until the bus driver gets angry and yells at the kid, ''''What if your dad was a drunk and your mom was a prostitute?!'''' The kid smiles and says, ''''I would be a bus driver!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t a blonde talk during sex? Because her mother told her never to talk to strangers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s black, blue, brown and laying in a ditch? A: A brunette who''s told too many blonde jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A four year old was at the pediatrician for a check up. As the doctor looked in her ears with an otoscope, he asked, "Do you think I''ll find Big Bird in here?" The little girl stayed silent. Next, the doctor took a tongue depressor and looked down her throat. He asked, "Do you think I''ll find the Cookie Monster down there?" Again, the little girl was silent. Then the doctor put a stethoscope to her chest. As he listened to her heart beat, he asked, "Do you think I''ll hear Barney in there?" "Oh, no!" the little girl replied. "Jesus is in my heart. Barney''s on my underpants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was reading the paper when an ad caught his eye. It loudly announced, "$500 Porsche! New!" The man thought that it was very unusual to sell a Porsche for $500, and he thought it might be a joke, but he said to himself, ''it''s worth a shot.'' So he went to the lady''s house who was selling the Porsche and she led him into the garage. Sure enough, there was an almost brand new Porsche. "Wow!" the man said, "Can I take it for a test drive?" "Sure," answered the lady. Unlike what he expected, the man found that the car ran perfectly. When he got back to the lady''s house, he asked her, "Why are you selling me this great Porsche for only $500?" Then the lady replied with a laugh, "My husband just ran off with his secretary, and he told me, ''You can have the house and the furniture, just sell my Porsche and send me the money.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man left for work one Friday afternoon, but since it was payday, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire paycheck instead of just going straight home. When he finally appeared at home on Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and a two-hour tirade befitting his actions. Finally his wife stopped the nagging and simply asked, "How would you like it if you didn''t see me for two or three days?" The man replied, "That would be fine with me." Monday went by and he didn''t see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. Come Thursday, the swelling went down just enough that he could see her a little bit out of the corner of his left eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s There? Rita Rita who? Rita book, you might learn something!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call a guy that sits on your doorstep? A. A Matt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a guy with a Spade in his head? A: Doug. Q: What do you call a guy without a spade in his head? A: Douglas', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: Who am I if I have 73 eyes, 4 noses, 8 heads, 139 arms, 78 legs and 100, 000, 000 lips? Answer: A liar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following: ''''Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, they come together. I come again. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once-a-more.'''' ''''You foul-mouthed swine,'''' retorted the lady indignantly. ''''In this country we don''t talk about our sex lives in public.'''' ''''Hey, coola down lady,'''' said the man. ''''Imma just tella my friend howa to spella Mississippi.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman went to her doctor''s office. She was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out screaming and ran down the hall. An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she explained. He had her sit down and relax in another room. The older doctor marched back to the first and demanded, "What''s the matter with you? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old, she has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?" The new doctor smiled smugly as he continued to write on his clipboard. "Cured her hiccups though, didn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to his wife, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?" "It depends," she replied. "What does it say on your shirt?" He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo daddy so bald he has to have holes in his pocket to finger through his hair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) If you and I were squirrels, I could bust a nut in your hole. 2) How do you like your eggs: fried, scrambled or fertilized? 3) My love for you is like diarrhea; I just can''t hold it in. 4) If your right leg was Thanksgiving, and your left leg was Christmas, then could I meet you between the holidays? 5) How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I''ll give you the meat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally, he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him. "Pardon me," she said, "I''m sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It''s just that you look just like my son who just died recently." "I''m very sorry," replied the young man, "Is there anything I can do for you?" "Yes," she said. "As I''m leaving, can you say ''Goodbye mother''? It would make me feel much better." "Sure," answered the young man. As the old woman was leaving, he called out, "Goodbye mother!" As he stepped up to the checkout counter, he saw that his total was $127.50. "How can that be?" he asked, "I only purchased a few things!" "Your mother said that you would pay for her," said the clerk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is the letter E like London? Because it is the Capital of England', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What disasters would happen if a waiter dropped a plate of turkey? The downfall of Greece, the overthrow of Turkey and the break up of China', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the blonde''s first words after 4 years of college? "Would you like fries with that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock? Who''s there? Alison. Alison who? Alison (I listen) to the radio sometimes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is walking down the street. Further down the street he notices Little Johnny. Little Johnny is sitting in a red wagon, wearing a fireman''s hat. The wagon is tied to a dog, by its balls. The man says to LittleJohnny "Little Johnny you could go alot further, if you tied the rope around the dogs neck." Little Johnny replies "If I did that, I wouldn''t have a siren"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A market researcher called at a house and his knock was answered by a young woman with three small children running around her. He asked her if she minded replying to his questions and she agreed. He asked her if she knew his company, Cheeseborough Ponds. When she said no, he mentioned that among their many products was Vaseline and she certainly knew of that product. When asked if she used it, the answer was "Yes." Asked how she used it, she said, "To assist sexual intercourse." The interviewer was amazed. He said, "I always ask that question because everyone uses our product and they always say they use it for the child''s bicycle chain, or the gate hinge; but I know that most use it for sexual intercourse. Since you''ve been so frank, could you tell me exactly how you use it?" "Yes, we put it on the doorknob to keep the kids out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a girl who wanted larger breasts, so one day she went to see her doctor, Dr. Smith. Dr. Smith told her to rub her breasts and repeat the following: "SCOOBIE,DOOBIE,LOOBIE, I WANT BIGGER BOOBIES". One day she was running late, and decided to do her exercises on the bus when a guy came up to her and asked if she was a patient of Dr. Smith''s, to which she replied: "Yes, how did you know?". He replied "HICKORY DICKORY DOC!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A son walks into the living room and asks his dad to borrow the car because he has a hot date. The dad says, ''''Sure, as soon as you cut your long hair.'''' The boy smiles and thinking he has outsmarted his dad replies, ''''Dad, Jesus had long hair...'''' And the dad replied, ''''Yeah, and Jesus walked everywhere he went too, didn''''t he?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor''s office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don''t do the following, your husband will surely die." "Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him. Don''t burden him with chores. Don''t discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse. No nagging. And most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week. If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely." On the way home, the husband asked his wife. "What did the doctor say?" "He said you''re going to die," she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo'' mama so poor, all she got you for Christmas was a video of other kids playin'' with their toys!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does it mean when a blonde is saying, "yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no?" She''s testing if her brunette friend''s turn signal is working!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks in to an auto store and asks the blonde cashier where the turtle wax is. The blonde says,"I''m sorry sir, but we don''t sell pet supplies."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a jailer and a jeweler? One sells watches, one watches cells!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so stupid she threw a clock out the window to see time fly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde keep a picture of herself in her room? So she could use it as a mirror!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was recess and the pre-schoolers came in. The teacher asked Susie what she did today. ''''Well, I played in the sandbox,'''' she said. The teacher said, ''''If you can spell sand, I''ll give you a fresh-baked cookie.'''' So Susie did. Then Billy came in and the teacher asked what he did. ''''I played in the sandbox with Susie,'''' he said. ''''If you can spell sand, I''ll give you a cookie,'''' the teacher said. So Billy did. Then the little Russian boy said, ''''Well, I wanted to play in the sandbox, but Billy and Susie were throwing rocks at me.'''' The teacher said, ''''Well, that sounds like discrimination. If you can spell that, I''ll give you a cookie.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid that she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde keep taking off and putting the Pepsi bottle cap back on? A: Because it said, ''''Sorry, try again.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so short, she did a suicide jump off of the curb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your IQ is so low, you have to dig for it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a restaurant, one of the customers noticed that all of the waiters had two spoons in their vest pockets. Upon being asked, one waiter said, "We see that the most frequently dropped silverware are spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement." Then the customer noticed that a string was hanging out of all the waiters'' flies and asked what the string was for. "The string is for us to go to the bathroom," explained the waiter, "that way, when we pull it, it shoots and aims right away. Then we don''t have to stop to wash our hands." The customer asked, "Well, that''s how you get it out, but how do you get it back in?" The waiter whispered confidentially, "I don''t know about the others, but I use the two spoons."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was so cold today I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the redneck die drinking milk? The cow sat on him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent, and the last instruction of the Mother Superior is that they must not get even a drop of paint on their habits. After conferring about this for a while, the two nuns decide to lock the door of the room, strip off their habits, and paint in the nude. In the middle of the project, there comes a knock at the door. "Who is it?" calls one of the nuns. "Blind man," replies a voice from the other side of the door. The two nuns look at each other and shrug, and, deciding that no harm can come from letting a blind man into the room, they open the door. "Nice gazongas," says the man, "where do you want these blinds?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one, and everyone elses'' stinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell that a blonde has been at a computer? There is lipstick on the joy stick!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why does a blonde nurse carry around a red pen? A: To draw blood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that I ran out of gas trying to drive around her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Wave!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two doctors are in the hallway complaining about nurse Nancy. ''''She''s out of control!'''' the first doctor says. ''''She does everything backwards. Just last week I told her to give a man two milligrams of morphine every ten hours. Instead, she gave him 10 milligrams every two hours. He almost died!'''' ''''That''s nothing,'''' said the second doctor, "earlier this week I told her to give a man an enema every 24 hours. Instead she tried to give him 24 enemas in one hour!'''' All of a sudden they heard a blood curldling scream from down the hallway. ''''OH MY GOD! I just realized that I told nurse Nancy to prick Mr. Smiths boil!''''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newlywed couple had just arrived in their honeymoon suite. After unpacking, the husband took off his pants. ''''Put these on,'''' he said to his wife. She did and they were nearly twice her size. ''''There''s no way I can wear these. They''re too big,'''' she said. ''''Good, now you know who wears the pants in this family.'''' Flustered, the wife takes off her panties and gives them to her husband. ''''Put these on,'''' she commands. The husband looks at the small pair of panties and says, ''''There''s no way I can get into these.'''' To which the wife replied, ''''You''re right about that until you change your attitude.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked God how much a million dollars was to him. God replied, "Oh, about one penny." Then the man asked how much an eternity was to him. God replied, "Oh, about a second." Then the man asked. "Can I have a million dollars and live an eternal life?" God replied, "Sure, just wait a sec."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day in summer, Jack was going to visit his friend John. When he got to his house, he saw John, who was dressed in his warmest winter coats. "What are you doing? Are you nuts? It''s the middle of summer!" cried Jack. "I am painting my house. And on the can, it says you must put two coats on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife had four boys. The odd part of it was that the older three had red hair, light skin, and were tall, while the youngest son had black hair, dark eyes, and was short. The father eventually took ill and was lying on his deathbed when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, before I die, be totally honest with me - is our youngest son my child?" The wife replied, "I swear on everything that''s holy that he is your son." With that the husband passed away. The wife then muttered, "Thank God he didn''t ask about the other three."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W. Bush was out jogging one morning when he tripped, fell over a bridge railing and landed in the creek below. Before the Secret Service guys could get to him, three kids who were fishing, pulled him out of the water. He was so grateful he offered the kids whatever they wanted. The first kid said, "I sure would like to go to Disneyland." George said, "No problem. I''ll take you there on Air Force One." The second kid said, "I really need a new pair of Nike Air Jordan''s." George said, "I''ll get them for you and even have Michael sign them!" The third kid said, "I want a motorized wheelchair with a built-in TV and stereo headset!!" George Bush is a little perplexed by this and says, "But you don''t look like you are injured." The kid says, "I will be after my dad finds out I saved your ass from drowning!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the baby lightbulb say to his mother? I wuv you watts and watts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo'' Mama''s teeth are so yellow, her tonsils have to wear sunglasses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so dumb she brought toilet paper to a craps game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde with two burnt ears went to the doctor, who asked what had happened. "The phone rang, and I accidentally picked up the iron." "What about the other one?" "They called back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What happens when you cross a Bulldog with a Shih tzu? A. You get Bullshit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a blonde''s mating call? NEXT!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three couples went in to see the minister to see how to become members of his church. The minister said that they would have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and tell him how it went. The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle-aged and the final couple was newlywed. Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister. The retired couple said it was no problem at all. The middle-aged couple said it was tough for the first week, but after that, it was no problem. The newlyweds said it was fine until she dropped the can of paint. "Can of PAINT!" exclaimed the minister. "Yeah," said the newlywed man. "She dropped the can and when she bent over to pick it up I had to have her right there and then. Lust took over." The minister just shook his head and said that they were not welcome in the church. "That''s okay," said the man. "We''re not welcome in Home Depot either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so ugly when she threw a boomerang it never came back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy is gone to school one day and while he is gone, his cat gets killed. His mother is very concerned about how he will take the news. Upon his arrival home, she explains the tragedy and tries to console the boy saying, "But don''t worry, the cat is in heaven with God now." To which the boy replied, "What''s God gonna'' do with a dead cat?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy''s on the electric chair. The warden''s just about to pull the switch, when the guy gets the hiccups. The warden says, "Do you have any last requests?" The guy says, "(hic) Yeah... (hic) could you please do (hic) could you please do something to scare me?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, a redhead and a blonde went to an ice cream parlor together. The brunette went up and asked for a Dr. Pepper float with no ice cream. The counter man was confused, but gave her a Dr. Pepper float with no ice cream. The redhead went up and asked for a single dip of vanilla ice cream with Pepsi poured over it. The man was really confused now. But he gave the redhead her order. The blonde was listening to the other two women and thought that she should have a ''''special order'''' too. So she went up and asked for an extra-large root beer, but hold the roots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are walking down the road when one says ''''Look at that dog with one eye!'''' The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says ''''Where?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been married for a long time, but could never get along very well. Many times, late at night, there would be screams and shouts from their house. The old man often screamed these words at her in public, "I''m sick and tired of you! When I die, I will come out of my grave to haunt you!" The old guy started practicing black magic. All the disappearances in the neighborhood of cats, dogs and people were blamed on him. At the age of 80 the old guy died, and his wife put him in a casket. Later that night, she went to a bar and partied as if there was no tomorrow. Her neighbor asked her, "Aren''t you scared that the old guy will dig up and haunt you?" The old lady calmly replied, "Eh, let him keep digging. I put the casket in face down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Six Most Important Men in a Woman''s Life THE DOCTOR, because he says, "Take your clothes off." THE DENTIST, because he says, "Open wide." THE HAIRDRESSER, because he says, "Do you want them teased or blown?" THE MILKMAN, because he says, "Do you want it in the back or in the front?" THE INTERIOR DECORATOR, because he says, "Once it''s in you''ll love it." THE BANKER, because he says, "If you take it out too soon you''ll lose interest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so dumb, she drowned during the wave at the football stadium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I''m going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are women and a tornado alike? They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ben Dover Mike Hunt Phil McCrackin Ajock Strap Anita Cock Ipe Freely Seymour Buttes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy is leaving school at the end of the day. As he strolls along the sidewalk, a car pulls up to the curb, and a man winds down the window. "Hey, kid, I''ve got candy in my car. Hop in and I''ll give it to you." "No. I''m not going to." The boy walks on. Further down the road, the car pulls over again. "Hey there kid, if you get in my car, I''ll give you all this candy, and a big bottle of cola. How about it?" "No way! Now leave me alone!" The boy walks on, quickening his pace. The car again pulls over beside him. "Look, kid, I''ve got a puppy at home you''d love to see. Get in and I''ll take you there. You can have all the candy and the cola on the way. What d''you say to that?" The boy is getting agitated. He stops walking, and leans down to the car window. "Look, I don''t care what you promise me Dad. I''m NOT riding in your Lada!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a painless way to save money, a young couple arranged that every time they have sex the husband puts his pocket change into a china piggy bank on the bedside table. One night while being unusually athletic, he accidentally knocked the piggy bank onto the floor where it smashes. To his surprise, among the masses of coins, there are handfuls of five and ten dollar bills. He asks his wife "What''s up with all the notes?", to his wife which replies, "Well, not everyone is as cheap as you are."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife want to take golf lessons from a pro at a local country club. The man and woman meet the pro and head onto the driving range. The man goes up to hit first. He swings and hits the ball 100 yards. The golf pro says not bad. Golf pro: "Now hold the club as firm as you hold your wife''s breasts". The man follows instructions and hits the ball 300 yards. The golf pro says "Excellent!" Now the woman takes her turn. Her ball goes 30 yards. Golfpro: "Not bad, try holding the club like you hold your husbands dick." She swings and the ball goes 10 yards. Golfpro: "Not bad, but now try taking the club out of your mouth and hit the ball."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two drunks get thrown out of the bar and are walking down the street when they come across this dog, sitting on the curb, licking his balls. They stand there watching and after a while one of them says, "I sure wish I could do that!" The other one looks at him and says, "Well, I think I''d pet him first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old drunks in a bar. The first one says, "Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn''t bend it with either of my hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. "By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I''m gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand" "So," says the second drunk, "what''s your point?" "Well," says the first, "I''m just wondering how much stronger I''m gonna get!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A preacher goes into a bar and says "Anybody who wants to go to heaven, stand up." Everybody stands up except for a drunk in the corner. The preacher says "My son, don''t you want to go to heaven when you die?" The drunk says "When I die? Sure. I thought you were taking a load up now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a heavy night at the pub, a drunken man decides to sleep off his drunkenness at a local hotel. He approaches the reception desk, takes care of the formalities and heads off to his suite. Several minutes later, the drunk staggers back to the reception desk and demands his room be changed. "But sir," said the clerk, "you have the best room in the hotel." "I insist on another room!!!" said the drunk. "Very good, sir. I''ll change you from 502 to 525. Would you mind telling me why you don''t like 502?" asked the clerk. "Well, for one thing," said the drunk, "it''s on fire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman had two female parrots who were always yelling, "We''re prostitutes, wanna have a little fun?" One day, she was talking to her Preacher about this. He said he had two male parrots and all they did was read the Bible. He thought perhaps they would be a good influence on the two females. So they put the four parrots together. So, the females yelled at the male parrots, "We''re prostitutes, wanna have a little fun?" One male parrot said to the other, "Put the Bibles away! We''ve made it to heaven!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On her way home from a long trip, a blonde drove past a sign that said "CLEAN RESTROOMS 8 MILES". By the time she drove eight miles, she had cleaned 43 restrooms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dentist, after completing work on a patient, came to him begging. Dentist: Could you help me? Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful screams? Patient: Why? Doctor, it wasn''t all that bad this time. Dentist: There are so many people in the waiting room right now, and I don''t want to miss the four o''clock ball game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender smiles and says "Hey, ya know we have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper stops and says "Really? You have a drink called Steve?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Borrow money from a pessimist---They don''t expect it back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does Superman''s goldfish live ? In the superbowl....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does Batman''s goldfish live ? In the BAT-TUB!! ahahaha...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an foreign man who knew a little english and lived in a hotel. One day he told the waitress "I wanta fuck" the waitress said "what!!!" I wanta fuck, I wanta fuck on the table." The waitress answered and said "you better not you son of a bitch" so the waitress left mad and never gave him a fork. The next day he went to the manager and said "I wanta shit" the manager said "what!!!" "I wanta shit, I wanta shit on my bed" the manager answered "you better not you son of a bitch" and he never got the sheet he wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What''s with the steering wheel down your pants?" "Ach," says the Irish man, "it''s drivin'' me nuts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old people, a man and a woman, walk into a hospital. The doctor says to the old man, "I''ll need a urine sample, a feces sample, and a blood sample." The old man says, "What?" So the doctor says it again. Once again the old man says, "what?" So the doctor yells it, "I NEED A URINE SAMPLE, A FECES SAMPLE, AND A BLOOD SAMPLE!" With that the old woman turns to the old man and says, "He needs a pair of your underwear!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was driving down an Alaskan road and his car broke down. He phoned the Alaskan Mobile Fixit Service and they arrived shortly after. He service man opened the bonnet and after a while the repair man said " It looks like you''ve blown a seal ", the man replies "No, it''s just frost on my moustache."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two atoms are walking down the street when one atom says to the other, "I think I lost an electron." The other atom says "Are you sure?" "Yeah I''m positive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pretty woman in Poland? A tourist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is worst tasting, a bag of onions or porkloaf? Porkloaf, why? Because porkloaf spelled backwards is faolkrop which sounds like fowl crap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Hey! Now there''s a gift! 9. Well, well, well... 8. Boy, if I had not recently shot up 4 sizes that would''ve fit. 7. This is perfect for wearing around the basement. 6. Gosh. I hope this never catches fire! It is fire season though. There are lots of unexplained fires. 5. If the dog buries it, I''ll be furious! 4. I love it - but I fear the jealousy it will inspire. 3. Sadly, tomorrow I enter the Federal Witness Protection Program. 2. To think I got this the year I vowed to give all my gifts to charity. 1. I really don''t deserve this', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Can I pull my car in your garage? I''m not sure how long that cop car will stay lost. 9. There ain''t nothing that beats that great feeling of knowing your HIV test results are negative! I bet Sara''s will be okay too. 8. Nice place you got here. That painting looks expensive. I bet a nice home like this came with a safe already built in, didn''t it? 7. Sara is so pretty I''ve decided to give up being bisexual just for her. 6. Those home pregnancy kits aren''t very reliable in my opinion. 5. We''re going to keep our relationship quiet for now. My wife can be rather vindictive at times. 4. Can you believe it! Those shit heads at the corner market won''t cash my welfare check! 3. Which one of you taught Sara to give such great head? 2. Did you see that saucer that flew over town yesterday? 1. My parole officer thinks Sara has a calming effect on me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry, sir, but you''re only allowed one seat." The man groaned but didn''t budge. The usher became impatient. "Sir, if you don''t get up from there I''m going to have to call the manager." Again, the man just groaned, which infuriated the usher who turned and marched briskly back up the aisle in search of his manager. In a few moments, both the usher and the manager returned and stood over the man. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move him, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what''s your name?" "Sam," the man moaned. "Where ya from, Sam?" With pain in his voice Sam replied "The balcony."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom''s so fat, I have to take a bus a train and a cab just to get on her good side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom''s so fat she can''t even jump to a conclusion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother''s so fat, when she goes to a restaurant she looks at the menu and says, "OK"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman was patrolling a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw a couple inside with the dome light on. There was a young man in the driver''s seat reading a computer magazine and a young lady in the back seat knitting. He stopped to investigate. He walked up to the driver''s window and knocked. The young man looked up, cranked the window down, and said, "Yes, Officer?" "What are you doing?" the policeman asked. "What does it look like?" answered the young man. "I''m reading this magazine." Pointing towards the young lady in the back seat, the officer then asked, "And what is she doing?" The young man looked over his shoulder and replied, "What does it look like? She''s knitting." "And how old are you?" the officer then asked the young man. "I''m nineteen," he replied. "And how old is she?" asked the officer. The young man looked at his watch and said, "Well, in about twelve minutes she''ll be sixteen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was trying hard to get the catsup to come out of the bottle. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "It''s the minister, Mommy," the child said to her mother. Then she added, "Mommy can''t come to the phone right now. She''s hitting the bottle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How''s it work?" "Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, "Knock it off, you idiot! It''s two o''clock in the morning!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young bride and groom-to-be had just selected their wedding rings. As the young lady admired the plain platinum and diamond band she had chosen for herself, she suddenly looked concerned. "Tell me," she asked the rather elderly salesman, "is there anything special I''ll have to do to take care of this ring?" With a fatherly smile, the salesman said, "One of the best ways to protect a wedding ring is to soak it in dishwater."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The young clerk''s responsibilities included bringing the judge a hot cup of coffee at the start of every day. Each morning the judge was enraged that the coffee cup arrived two-thirds full. The clerk explained that he had to rush to get the coffee delivered while it was still hot, which caused him to spill much of it along the way. None of the judge''s yelling and insults produced a full cup of coffee, until he finally threatened to cut the clerk''s pay by one-third if he continued to produce one-third less than the judge wanted. The next morning he was greeted with a cup of coffee that was full to the brim, and the next morning and the morning after that. The judge couldn''t resist gloating over his success and smugly complimented the clerk on his new technique. "Oh, there''s not much to it," admitted the clerk happily, "I take some coffee in my mouth right outside the coffee room, and spit it back in when I get outside your office."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking to him for while, he tells his daughter she can''t do it because he''s her half brother. The same problem happens again four more times! The girl starts to get pissed off. She goes to her mom and says, "Mom... What have you been doing all your life? Dad''s been going around laying every maiden in the town and now I can''t marry any of the five guys I like because they have turned out to be my half brothers!!!" Her mom replies, "Don''t worry darling, you can marry any one of them you want, he isn''t really your dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher of the Earth Science class was lecturing on map reading. He spent the class explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes. Towards the end of class, the teacher asked his students, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude..." A student''s voice broke the confused silence, and volunteered, "I guess you''d be eating alone, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A highly timid little man, ventured into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?" A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his body hair growing out through the seams, turned slowly on his stool, looked down at the quivering little man and said, "It''s my dog. Why?" "Well," squeaked the little man, obviously very nervous, "I believe my dog just killed it, sir." "What?" roared the big man in disbelief. "What in the hell kind of dog do you have?" "Sir," answered the little man, "it''s a little four week old female puppy." "Bull!" roared the biker, "how could your puppy kill my Doberman?" "It appears that your dog choked on her, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two ducks walk into a bar... One duck looks at the other and says "Guess you didn''t see it either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A test-tube baby has a womb with a view.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a lawyer can be disbarred can a musician be denoted or a model deposed?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can''t stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are real comments made by teachers on their student report cards: 1. Since my last report, your child has hit rock bottom and has started to dig. 2. I would not allow this student to breed. 3. Your child has delusions of adequacy. 4. Your child is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. 5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them. 6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together. 7. This child has been working with glue too much. 8. When your daughter''s IQ reaches 50, she should sell. 9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn''t coming. 10. If this student were any more stupid, he''d have to be watered twice a week. 11. It''s impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others. 12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. After a few more he needs to go to the can. He doesn''t want anyone to steal his drink, so he puts a sign on it saying, "I spat in this beer, do not drink!" After a few minutes he returns and there is another sign next to his beer saying, "So did I!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama so fat that when she goes swimming in the ocean all the whales start singing, "We are familly even though you fatter than me".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your dad''s bald spot is so big you could draw an H on it and call it a helicopter landing pad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call something with 4 eyes, 3 noses, 7 ears, and 2 mouths? Ugly!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It''s not appropriate to say the word ''pee'' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to ''pee'' just tell me that you have to ''whisper.''" The following Sunday, the little boy went to church with his father and during the service said to his father, "Daddy, I have to whisper." The father looked at him and said, "Okay, why don''t you whisper in my ear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a boy standing on a corner selling fish. He was saying, "Dam fish for sale, dam fish for sale." A preacher walked up and asked why he was calling them dam fish. The kid said, "I caught them at the dam, so they''re dam fish." The preacher bought some, took them home and asked his wife to cook the dam fish. His wife looked at him in bewilderment and said, "Preachers aren''t supposed to talk like that." The preacher explained why they were dam fish, and she agreed to cook them. When dinner was ready and everyone was sitting down, the preacher asked his son to pass him the dam fish. His son replied, "That''s the spirit dad. Pass the fucking potatoes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. If I like it, it''s mine. 2. If it''s in my hand, it''s mine. 3. If I can take it from you, it''s mine. 4. If I had it a little while ago, it''s mine. 5. If it''s mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way. 6. If I''m doing or building something, all of the pieces are mine. 7. If it looks like mine, it''s mine. 8. If I saw it first, it''s mine. 9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine. 10. If it''s broken, it''s yours. Also... 11. If you built it, I get to knock it down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman. The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one has to drop off, otherwise they are all going to fall. They were not able to choose that person, but then the woman made a very touching speech. She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because as woman she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, and for men in general, without ever getting anything in return. As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy and his father were playing catch in the front yard when the boy saw a honey bee. He ran over and stomped it. "That was a honey bee," his father said, "one of our friends. For stomping him you will do without honey for a week." Later the boy saw a butterfly, so he ran over and stomped it. "That was a butterfly," his father said, "one of our friends, and for stomping him you will do without butter for a week." The next morning the family sat down for breakfast. The boy ate his plain toast with no honey or butter. Suddenly a cockroach ran out from under the stove. His mother stomped it. The boy looked at his father and said, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or should I?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Israeli soldier who just enlisted asked the Commanding Officer for a 3-day pass. The CO says "Are you crazy? You just join the Israeli army, and you already want a 3-day pass? You must do something spectacular for that recognition!" So the soldier comes back a day later in an Arab tank! The CO was so impressed, he asked "How did you do it?" "Well, I jumped in a tank, and went toward the border with the Arabs. I approached the border, and saw an Arab tank. I put my white flag up, the Arab tank put his white flag up. I said to the Arab soldier, ''Do you want to get a three-day pass?'' So we exchanged tanks!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow''s ear. The farmer didn''t think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket. So the farmer says "Oh, shoot! It went in one ear and out the udder"...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many roaches does it take to screw in a lightbulb???? A: Since when do roaches screw in lightbulbs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the bubblegum cross the road? Because he was stuck to the chickens leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did President George W. Bush go into a gorilla''s nest in the jungle? To be with his family!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fitted under his shirt and was not noticeable at all. On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school. Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with desk work. The classroom became a bit unruly and he admonished them. This happened several times. When he could do work at his desk, the strong breeze from the window made his tie flap annoyingly. He kept rearranging and rearranging the tie as the class raised its level of unruliness. Finally, becoming disgusted with the wayward tie, he stood up and took a big stapler off his desk and stapled the tie to his chest in several places. Discipline was not a problem from that day forth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very dirty little fellow came in from playing in the yard and asked his mother, "Who am I? " Ready to play the game she said, "I don''t know! Who are you?" "WOW!" cried the child. "Mrs. Johnson was right! She said I was so dirty, my own mother wouldn''t recognize me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was about to die, so he went to a black magic store to get a voodoo dick. The man at the store said, "It works. Anything you tell it to go to, it goes. So your wife can just say, ''Voodoo dick, my pussy.''" The man buys it and gives it to his wife. She says, "Voodoo dick, my pussy." It goes in and starts screwing. But she doesn''t know how to get it out. So she speeds to the hospital, but a cop catches her. He says, "What''s the hurry?" She says, "There''s a voodoo dick stuck in my pussy." The cop says, "Voodoo dick, my ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and wife are out shopping one day. The wife turns to her husband and says; "Darling it''s my mum''s birthday tomorrow what shall we get her? Perhaps something electric?" "A chair?" replies the husband.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe and Ted finished an exam and talked to each other afterwards. "I did terrible," said Joe. "I think I was filling in the wrong bubbles!" "Me too," replied Ted. "Well, why did you do terrible?" asked Joe. "I forgot to bring a pencil!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a City cop on his horse waiting to cross the street when a little boy on his new shiny bike stopped beside him. "Nice bike," the cop said "Did Santa bring it to you?" "Yep," the little boy said, "He sure did!" The cop looked the bike over and handed the boy a $20.00 ticket for a safety violation. The cop said, "Next year tell Santa to put a reflector light on the back of it." The young boy looked up at the cop and said "Nice horse you got there, Sir. Did Santa bring it to you?" "Yes, he sure did," chuckled the cop. The little boy looked up at the cop and said, "Next year tell Santa the d*ck goes underneath the horse not on top."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Though the walls of our apartment complex aren''t particularly thin, the floors and ceilings act as amplifiers. One night, several months ago, my wife and I were lying in bed. Noticing the repeated constant sound of a bed scooting along the floor and a headboard banging against a wall, we became aware that the occupants of the bedroom directly were doing more than tossing and turning in their sleep. This went on for some time. Later we described the event to our friends. US: "For the first five minutes, it was funny and kind of embarrassing that we could hear them so well. "After about ten minutes, it became really annoying. "After fifteen minutes, it was getting very frustrating because it was keeping us from going to sleep..." FRIENDS: "And then?" US: "And then after twenty straight minutes...Okay, after twenty minutes it was pretty damn impressive."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: I got a problem. Ed: What''s the matter? Joe: Women. I just don''t understand them. Ed: Do you understand your TV? Joe: No. Ed: So what''s the problem?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher has set the class an assignment. He stresses the importance of the particular assignment, and that no excuses will be accepted except illness (with a medical certificate) or a death in the immediate family (with a note from that member). A smart-ass student pipes up: "What about extreme sexual exhaustion, sir?" The class breaks up laughing, and when they settle down the teacher responds with: "Well, Jones, I guess you''ll have to learn to write with your other hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces "I''m looking for the man who shot my paw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I half a spelling checker, It came with my pea sea; It plainly marks four my revue, Mistakes I kin not sea. I''ve run this poem threw it, I''m sure your please two no, Its letter perfect in it''s weigh, My checker tolled me sew.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eager to make full use of my new computer''s capabilities, I asked a customer-service representative at my bank whether it offered on-line banking. "Certainly," she stated matter-of-factly, pointing to a crowd of people near the tellers. "The line starts over there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend was on duty in the main computer lab on a quiet afternoon he noticed a young woman sitting in front of one of the workstations with her arms crossed across her chest, staring at the screen. After about 15 minutes he noticed that she was still in the same position, only now she was impatiently tapping her foot. Finally, he approached her and asked if she needed help. She replied, "It''s about time! I pressed the F1 button over twenty minutes ago!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock! Knock! Who''s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up and let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman pulls over a reckless driver along the road. Going up to the driver''s window, he takes one look and notes, "Your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?" The driver looks up out of those bloodshot eyes and responds, "Your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating donuts?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Officer: "And you still insist you''re innocent, in spite of the fact that we have six witnesses to the crime ?" Offender: "If it''s witnesses you want, I can produce seventy people who didn''t see me steal the stuff."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Dean from the University of Northern Colorado was a victim of a hit and run. He was just getting to his feet when a policeman ran up to help. "My mother-in-law just tried to run me over!" the shaken Dean told the cop. "The car hit you from behind," the officer said. "How could you tell it was your mother-in-law?" "I recognized the laugh!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A butcher was minding his store one day, when a dog ran in and stole a cut of meat off his counter. The butcher recognized the dog as belonging to his neighbor, who was a lawyer. He called up his neighbor and said, "Your dog stole meat from my store. I believe you owe me for the meat." The lawyer said, " You are correct. How much was the meat?" The butcher told him that it cost $4.50, the lawyer replied that he should receive a check for that amount in the mail the next day. The next day, the check arrived in the mail for $4.50, with a bill attached for $150, "for legal consultation".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter: Mother: "What does the cow say?" Child: "Moooo!" Mother: "Great! What does the cat say?" Child: "Meow." Mother: "Oh, you''re so smart! What does the frog say?" The wide-eyed little three-year-old looked up at her mother and replied, Child: "Bud."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always on the look-out for a bargain, I was dining out and came across a menu entree "T-Bone* $4.25". I inquired of the waiter how they could sell a dinner at that price. He advised me to check the bottom of the menu. Next to the "*" was "with meat, $14.95"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is it Michael Jackson''s bed time? When the little hand meets the big hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call happiness? Seeing your mother-in-law''s photo on the back of a milk carton!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an alchoholic & a drug addict? The alchoholic drives over the stop sign, while the drug addict waits for it to turn green.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Barry calls his boss. "I''m having problems with my eyes." "What''s wrong with them?" his boss asks. "I just can''t see myself coming into work today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I wanted to think of a better come back, I''d dig it out of your @$$!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and a Newfie walked into a pub together. They proceeded to each buy a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the foam. The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust. The Scotsman fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened. The Newfie too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer and then started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU THIEF!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio? It took her a month to realize she could play it at night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in spring training.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA? "Look! They have spelt MACY''S wrong!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the difference between a paycheck and your dick ? A. You don''t have to beg a woman to blow your paycheck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What are the small bumps around a woman''s'' nipples for ? A. They are Braille for "suck here".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the difference between a woman and a coffin ? A. You come in one and go in the other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do women close their eyes during sex ? A. They can''t stand seeing a man have a good time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the difference between your wife and your job ? A. After 5 years your job will still suck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the best thing about a blow job ? A. Ten minutes of silence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How is a woman like a laxative ? A. They both irritate the shit out of you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do husbands die before their wives ? A. They want to', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s the difference between a woman with PMS and a pitbull ? A. Lipstick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. What do you mean "today''s our anniversary"? 9. Can we not talk to each other tonight? I''d rather just watch TV. 8. Ohh, this diamond is way too big! 7. And for our honeymoon we''re going fishing in Alaska! 6. Can our relationship get a little more physical? I''m tired of being "just friends". 5. Honey does this outfit make my butt look too small? 4. Aww, don''t stop for directions, I''m sure you''ll be able to figure out how to get there. 3. Is that phone for me? Tell ''em I''m not here. 2. I don''t care if it is on sale, 300 dollars is too much for a designer dress. 1. Hey, pull my finger!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife are celebrating their 50th anniversary. That night the wife approaches her husband wearing the exact same sexy little negligee she wore on their wedding night. She looks at her husband and says, "Honey,do you remember this?" He looks up at her and says, "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night we were married." She says, "Yes, that''s right. Do you remember what you said to me that night." He nods and says, "Yes dear, I still remember." "Well, what was it?" she asks. He responds, "Well honey, as I remember, I said, "Ohhhhhhhhh Baby, I''m going to suck the life out of those big tits and screw your brains out." She giggles and says, "Yes honey, that''s it. That''s exactly what you said. So, now it''s 50 years later, I''m in the same negligee I wore that night. What do you have to say tonight?" Again he looks up at her and looks her up and down and replies, "Mission Accomplished."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a pack of Indians and the Indian Chief could never seem to fart. So eventually he got one of his Indian people to call up a doctor and tell him "Big Chief no fart!". So the doctor came up the next day with a pill and he says "Here, take this and call me the next day to tell me what happened." So the Indian calls back up the next day and says "Still, Big Chief no fart!" So the doctor brought up an even bigger pill. The next day the Indian calls the doctor up and says "Once again, Big Chief no fart!". So the doctor had enough of this and brought this HUGE pill, I mean this pill had to be taken in by tanks. So the next day the Indian calls up the doctor and says..."BIG FART, NO CHIEF!!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to his dentist because he has a strange feeling in his mouth. The dentist examines him and says, "That new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?" The man replies, "All I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious...Hollandaise sauce. I loved it so much I now put it on everything - meat, toast, fish, vegtables, everything." "Well," says the dentist, "That''s probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. It has eaten away your upper plate. I''ll make you a new plate, and this time use chrome." "Why chrome?" asks the patient. To which the dentist replies, "It''s simple. Everyone knows that there''s no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. He retired following a happy thirty-year career. Shortly thereafter his company contacted him about a seemingly impossible problem with one of their million-dollar machines. The engineer reluctantly took the challenge. After spending a day studying the huge machine, he marked a small "X" in chalk on a machine component and proudly stated, "This is where your problem is." The part was replaced and the machine worked perfectly. The company was astounded to receive a bill for $50,000 from the engineer for his service. They demanded an itemized accounting of his charges. The engineer responded briefly: One chalk mark ..............$1 Knowing where to put it .....$49,999', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That wife of mine is a liar, said the angry husband to a sympathetic pal seated next to him in the bar. "How do you know?" the friend asked. "She didn''t come home last night, and when I asked her where she''d been, she said she''d spent the night with her sister, Shirley." "So?" the friend replied. "So, she''s a liar. I spent the night with her sister Shirley!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were 2 guys who were best friends, Bob and Carl, that went walking everyday past a very fancy restuarant made up of very clear, expensive glass. Well everytime they went by, they would always make jokes about the rich snobs who dined there (of course because they were jealous because they wanted to be in there eating the expensive food). So one day Bob made a bet with Carl that he could make half of the people throw up. As soon as Carl agreed on the bet, Bob went and put his boogers and some dog poop all over the glass and indeed half of the people did throw up. So Carl lost some money but wanted to get it back. So he made a bet the he could get the other half of the people to throw up. Bob thought there is no way of doing this but he did. Carl went up and licked it all off! And in the end they both broke even. The End (lol)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service, the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan! They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive! She lives for ten more years, and then dies. Once again, a ceremony is held, and at the end of it, the pall bearers are again carrying out the casket. As they carry the casket towards the door, the husband cries out: "Watch that fucking wall!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde says to a brunette, ''''Excuse me, but each time I sip my coffee, my eye seems to hurt.'''' The brunette says, ''''Well maybe you should take the spoon out of the cup.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a very old man, whose verses no one could scan. And when they asked, "Why?" he said, "I don''t know, I "just put too many words in the last line, I guess."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an old man from Purdue whose limericks stopped on line two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineer, a systems analyst, and a programmer were on their way to a tech conference on the other side of the mountains. Half way down the other side, the brakes gave out, and the engineer steered for all his life to keep the car from going clean off the edge. It was at the last second, skidding sideways towards doom, that the car finally stopped. One tire dropped over the edge. The three sprang from the car, shaking and panting. The engineer was the first to speak. "We could have been killed! I would like to get under the car and see just what happened to those brakes. Something has to be fixed." The systems analyst agreed. "Yes, but I''d like to see the design blueprints. We could fix the problem with these cars with a little research." The programmer was scratching his head. "I wonder if that''s repeatable."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Scot and Mick Jagger? Mick Jagger sang "Hey, you, get offa my cloud." The Scot says "Hey, McCloud, get offa my ewe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walked into a library and said to the librarian, "Can I have some fish and chips please?" The librarian gave her a funny look and said, " I''m sorry, this is a library." So the blonde whispers,"Can I have some fish and chips please?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blonde, a brunette and a red head on an island and they were almost starving. In the end the brunette decided she would rather die trying to get back to land, which looked about 20 miles away, than stay on the island and starve. So she started swimmming and got about 10 miles out before she gave up and drowned. The red head decided she would do the same thing and she got 15 miles out before she gave up and drowned. The blonde was lonely without the others so she swam out and got 19 miles out. "Oh, I''m too tired!" she said. So she swam back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a curio store and was shopping around. After awhile, a golden rat interested him and he went to purchase it. "That''ll be $20 for the rat and $1,000 for the story behind it," said the shop owner. "Thanks, but I''ll just take the rat for $20 and leave the story". He bought the golden rat and left the store. While walking down the street, he saw all sorts of rats following him. The further he walked, even more rats came. He went down to the docks and still more rats ran out and followed him. So he walked out into the water, and all the rats drowned. He returned to the curio store soon after. "Sooo," said the proprietor. "You''ve come back for the story, I thought so!" "Nope," said the man. "Got any golden lawyers?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man arrives at his laywer''s funeral and and was very dismayed by the presence of this one person. He turns to the people around him. ''Why are you all at this man''s funeral?'' A man turns towards him and says, ''We''re all clients.'' ''And you ALL came to pay your respects? How touching.'' ''Huh? No, we came to make sure he was dead.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she plays hopscotch like this: "Washington, California..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a horse''s favourite Shakepearean play? Rodeo and Juliet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s the day''s stock market report: Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary. Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading. Knives were up sharply. Cows steered into a bull market. Pencils lost a few points. Hiking equipment was trailing. Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline. Weights were up in heavy trading. Light switches were off. Mining equipment hit rock bottom. Diapers remained unchanged. Shipping lines stayed at an even keel. The market for raisins dried up. Coca Cola fizzled. Caterpillar stock inched up a bit. Sun peaked at midday. Rain dampened the rally. Balloon prices were inflated. Scott Tissue touched a new bottom. And batteries exploded in an attempt to recharge the market.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It seems the US Federal Aviation Administration has a unique device for testing the strength of windshields on irplanes. The device is a gun that launches a dead chicken at a plane''s windshield at approximately the speed the plane flies. The theory is that if the windshield doesn''t crack from the carcass impact, it''ll survive a real collision with a bird during flight. It seems the British were very interested in this and wanted to test a windshield on a brand new, speedy locomotive they were developing. They borrowed the FAA''s chicken launcher, loaded the chicken and fired. The ballistic chicken shattered the windshield, went through the engineer''s chair, broke an instrument panel and embedded itself in the back wall of the engine cab. The British were stunned and asked the FAA to recheck the test to see if everything was done correctly. The FAA reviewed the test thoroughly and had one recommendation: "Use a thawed chicken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma''s like the Bermuda Triangle, they both swallow a lot of seamen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma''s like a fine restaurant, she only takes deliveries in the rear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s like a bubble gum machine, 5 cents a blow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. "Tim, you be first" she said. "What does your mother do all day?" Tim stood up and proudly said, "She''s a doctor." "That''s wonderful. How about you, Amie?" Amie shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman." "Thank you, Amie," said the teacher. "What about your father, Billy?" Billy proudly stood up and announced, "My daddy works in a topless bar!" The teacher was aghast and promptly changed the subject to geography. Later that day she went to Billy''s house and rang the bell. Billy''s father answered the door. The teacher explained what his son had said and demanded an explanation. Billy''s father said, "I''m actually an attorney. But, how can I explain that to a seven-year-old?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they bury lawyers 10 feet below ground instead of the usual 6? Because deep down, they''re not so bad!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is heavier, 20 pounds of rocks or 20 pounds of sugar? Their both 20 pounds! doy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Better to be pissed off than pissed on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond got a new job cutting down trees. On the first day her boss handed her a chainsaw and said, "Now you have to go into that forest and cut down as many trees as possible using that chain saw. Please be careful with it and also please remember that the minimum is 6 trees a day." The blonde went into the forest and cut down trees but at the end of the day she had only managed to cut down 4. Her boss decided to give another chance but the next day she only managed 3. He decided to give her one last chance but on the third day she only cut two trees. When she finished work, he called the blond over and took her back into the forest. "Right,"he said,"You must be doing something wrong here so watch how I do it, then I''ll give you one more chance before you''re fired. So he stood in front of the tree and started up the chainsaw. The blond looked around suddenly and said, "What''s that noise?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? time to get a new fence!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a pig who knows karate? A Pork-Chop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old country gentleman and his wife were out driving one day, when a police officer pulled him over. "What seems to be the trouble young man?" asked the old gentleman. The officer said, "Excuse me sir, but didn''t you notice your wife fell out of the car back there?" To which the old gentleman exclaimed, "Thank you son, I thought I went deaf!!!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Grass is green. You have the shape Of a washing machine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s brown and has holes in it? Swiss shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it takes to screw in a lightbulb? three: one to unscrew it one to buy a new lightbulb one to call her boyfriend to screw it back in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Definition of Agony? One armed man hanging off a cliff with itchy balls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: Hi Jack. How did you like horseback riding? Jack: Not that much. The problem was that the horse was too polite. Joe: Polite? Jack: Yep. When we reached the fence he let me go over first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been married 15 years. One afternoon they were working in the garden together. As the wife was bending over pulling weeds the husband said, "Hey honey, you are getting fat. Your butt is getting huge. I bet it''s as big as the gas grill now." The husband feeling he needed to prove his point, got a yardstick, measured the grill and then measured his wife''s butt. "Yep," he said, "Just what I thought, just about the same size." The wife got very incensed and decided to let him do the gardening alone. She went inside and didn''t speak to her husband the rest of the day. That evening when they went to bed, the husband cuddled up to his wife and said, "How about it, hon? How about a little lovemaking?" The wife rolled over and turned her back to him, giving him the cold shoulder. "What''s the matter?" he asked. To which she replied, "You don''t think I''m going to fire up this big gas grill for one little weenie, do you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It has been determined. The most used sexual position for married couples is a doggie position. The husband sits and begs. The wife rolls over and plays dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For weeks a six-year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house. One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements of the unborn child. The six-year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacher about the impending event. The teacher finally sat the boy on her lap and said, "Tommy, whatever has become of that baby brother or sister you were expecting at home?" Tommy burst into tears and confessed, "I think Mommy ate it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little nine-year-old girl was in church with her mother when she started feeling ill. "Mommy" she said "Can we leave now?" "No," her mother replied. "Well, I think I have to throw up!" "Then go out the front door and around to the back of the church and throw up behind a bush." In about two minutes the little girl returned to her seat. "Did you throw up?" her mother asked. "Yes," the little girl replied. "Well, how could you have gone all the way to the back of the church and return so quickly?" "I didn''t have to go out of the church, Mommy," the little girl replied, "They have a box next to the front door that says ''for the sick''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Peterson phoned the repairman because her dishwasher quit working. He couldn''t accommodate her with an "after-hours" appointment and since she had to go to work, she told him, "I''ll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dish washer, leave the bill on the counter, and I''ll mail you a check. By the way, I have a large rotweiler inside named Killer; he won''t bother you. I also have a parrot, and whatever you do, do not talk to the bird!" Well, sure enough the dog, Killer, totally ignored the repairman, but the whole time he was there, the parrot cursed, yelled, screamed, and about drove him nuts. As he was ready to leave, he couldn''t resist saying, "You stupid bird, why don''t you shut up!" To which the bird replied, "Killer, get him!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During training exercises, the lieutenant who was driving down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud with a red-faced colonel at the wheel. "Your jeep stuck, sir?" asked the lieutenant as he pulled alongside. "Nope," replied the colonel, coming over and handing him the keys, "Yours is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, "What time is it?" The tower responded, "Who is calling?" The aircraft replied, "What difference does it make?" The tower replied "It makes a lot of difference. If it is an American Airlines flight, it is 3 o''clock. If it is an Air Force plane, it is 1500 hours. If it is a Navy aircraft, it is 6 bells. If it is an Army aircraft, the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 3. If it is a Marine Corps aircraft, it''s Thursday afternoon and 120 minutes to "Happy Hour".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (NULL, '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walked up to a beautiful young woman in a bar. "Do you mind if I ask you a personal question?" he said to her. "I don''t know," replied the beautiful young woman. "It depends how personal it is." "OK," the guy said. "How many men have you slept with?" "I''m not going to tell you that!" the woman exclaimed. "That''s my business!" "Sorry," said the guy, "I didn''t realize you made a living out of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few rules for what women can and cannot wear at a private pool. 1) Thongs are encouraged... however only if certain conditions are met. 1A) There must be a direct correlation to the amount of total square inches of skin, to the total amount of square inches of bathing suit. In other words, if you are any larger than a mini van, a string bikini should be frowned upon. 1B) Thongs or ass floss as they have been come to be known in pool and beach circles, should be worn as long as there is not more cellulite on your buttocks than in one of Mel Gibson''s Epic type movies. 2) Women with near perfect figures, cannot wear one piece bathing suits... plain and simple. Damn, I know it''s a sexist world, but it''s the world that we live in. 3) Curlers are strictly verboten.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hours after the end of the world, a border dispute emerged between heaven and hell. God, invited the devil for conversations to find a way to resolve this dispute quickly. Satan proposed a soccer game between heaven and hell. God, always fair, said to the devil, "The heat must be affecting your brain, the game would be so one sided. Don''t you know all the ''good'' players go to heaven?" The devil, smiling, responded "Yeah, but we''ve got all the refs!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you studied for a blood test!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mafioso''s son sits at his desk writing a Christmas list to Jesus. He first writes, "Dear baby Jesus, I have been a good boy the whole year, so I want a new..." He looks at it, then crumples it up into a ball and throws it away. He gets out a new piece of paper and writes again, "Dear baby Jesus, I have been a good boy for most of the year, so I want a new..." He again looks at it with disgust and throws it away. He then gets an idea. He goes into his mother''s room, takes a statue of the Virgin Mary, puts it in the closet, and locks the door. He takes another piece of paper and writes, "Dear baby Jesus. If you ever want to see your mother again..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children in the back of the car cause accidents. Accidents in the back of the car cause children', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks out of a bar totally hammered, only to be greeted by a snobby woman. She takes one look at him. "You, sir, are drunk!" "And you ma''am, are ugly. But when I wake up, I will be sober!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A small boy and his father were visiting a nearby mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny silver walls that moved apart and back together again by themselves. The lad asked, "What is this, father?" The father (having never seen an elevator) responded, "I have no idea what it is." While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheelchair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched as small circles lit up above the walls. The walls opened up again and a beautiful twenty-four-year-old woman stepped out. The father looked at his son anxiously and said, "Go get your mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A devoted wife had spent her lifetime taking care of her husband. Now he had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to his senses, he motioned for her to come near him. As she sat by him, he said, ''''You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?'''' ''''What, my dear?'''' she asked gently. ''''I think you bring me bad luck.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses. -Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship. -Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails, sloths, and elephants. -Bathhouses are against the law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same parrot and it said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." She was incredibly ticked now. The next day the same parrot again said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and kill the bird. The store manager replied, "That''s not good," and promised he wouldn''t say it again. When the lady walked past the store that day after work the parrot called to her, "Hey lady." She paused and said, "Yes?" The bird said, "You know."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES. The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop - it read... MAIN ENTRANCE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the supermarket was a man pushing a cart which contained a screaming, bellowing baby. The gentleman kept repeating softly, "Don''t get excited, Albert; don''t scream, Albert; don''t yell, Albert; keep calm, Albert." A woman standing next to him said, "You certainly are to be commended for trying to soothe your son, Albert." The man looked at her and said, "Lady, I''m Albert."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young gay man calls home and tells his Jewish mother that he has decided to go back into the closet because he has met a wonderful girl and they are going to be married. He tells his mother that he is sure she will be happier since he knows that his gay lifestyle has been very disturbing to her. She responds that she is indeed delighted and asks tentatively, "I suppose it would be too much to hope that she would be Jewish?" He tells her that not only is the girl Jewish, but is from a wealthy Beverly Hills family. She admits she is overwhelmed by the news, and asks, "What is her name?" He answers, "Monica Lewinsky." There is a long pause, then his mother asks, "What happened to that nice Catholic boy you were dating last year?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) How many jugglers does it take to change a lightbulb? A) One, but it takes 3 lightbulbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)Where do penguins go to dance? A)The snowball', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)Where do eskimo pigs live? A)In a pigloo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)Why does a traffic light turn red? A)You would to if you had to change in front of all those people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)what do you call a polar bear in the jungle? A)lost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q)A hippo is sitting on your chair....what time is it? A)Time to get a new chair', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when a rooster crosses a duck? A: A bird that gets up at the quack of dawn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.Why shouldn''t you wear snow boots? A.Because they will melt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why would Snow White be a good judge? A.Because she''s the fairest in the land.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.Where do tough chickens come from? A.Hard boiled eggs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.Why did the house go to the doctor? A.To get a cure for his window pane!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the chef name his son? Stu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you fix a broken tomato? With tomato paste!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After spending time with Eve, Adam was walking in the Garden with God. Adam told God how much the woman means to him and how blessed he feels to have her. Adam began to ask questions about her. Adam: Lord, Eve is beautiful. Why did you make her so beautiful? God: So you will always want to look at her. Adam: Lord, her skin is so soft. Why did you make her skin so soft? God: So you will always want to touch her. Adam: She always smells so good. Lord, why did you make her smell so good? God: So you will always want to be near her. Adam: That''s wonderful Lord ... and I don''t want to seem ungrateful, but why did you make her so stupid? God: So she would love you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the lion say to his friends before they go out hunting for food? "Let us prey."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a snail who was sick and tired of his reputation for being so slow. He decided to get some fast wheels to make up the difference. After shopping around a while, he decided that the Ferraro 240-Z was the car to get. So the snail goes to the nearest Ferraro dealer and says he wants to buy the 240-Z, but he wants it repainted "240-S". The dealer asks, "Why ''S''?" The snail replies, "''S'' stands for snail. I want everybody who sees me roaring past to know who''s driving." Well, the dealer doesn''t want to lose the unique opportunity to sell a car to a snail, so he agrees to have the car repainted for a small fee. The snail gets his new car and spent the rest of his days roaring happily down the highway at top speed. And whenever anyone would see him zooming by, they''d say "Wow! Look at that S-car go!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cat say to the elephant? "......................meOW!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tone paint work - Original color and rust. "One careful owner" - But the other nine were clumsy as anything. "10,000 trouble-free miles" - Crashed in the last 20 feet. "Heated rear window" - So you don''t get cold hands when push-starting the thing in winter. "Very clean" - Only washed if and when it rains. "Lady owner" - The glove box is full of half-used cosmetics. "Clean interior" - All the rubbish is under the floormats. "Immobilizer" - The gear shift comes off in your hand. "Anti-theft device" - I can let you have a Rottweiler cheap. "Drives beautifully" - ... in a straight line; the steering is all over the place. "Low mileage" - The odometer is on its third time around. "Full service history" - Charlie in the garage round the corner checked it over last week. "Economical" - Doesn''t use much fuel, as it can''t go any faster than 30 mph.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman: Honey, do you love me? Man: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies! Woman: Do I look fat in this? Man: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies! Woman: Did you enjoy the meal? Man: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies! Woman: Do you see the wrinkles on my face? Man: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies! Man: Do you wanna fool around tonight? Woman: Sure Honey! Man: Was it as good for you as it was for me? Woman: Ask me no questions, i''ll tell you no lies!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl went out on a date with a trumpet player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was it? Did his embouchure make him a great kisser?" "Nah," the first girl replied. "That dry, tight, tiny little pucker; it was no fun at all." The next night she went out with a tuba player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?" "Ugh!" the first girl exclaimed. "Those huge, rubbery, blubbery, slobbering slabs of meat; oh, it was just gross!" The next night she went out with a French horn player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?" "Well," the first girl replied, "his kissing was just so-so; but I loved the way he held me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the middle of a forest, there was a hunter who was suddenly confronted by a huge, mean bear. In his fear, all attempts to shoot the bear were unsuccessful. Finally, he turned and ran as fast as he could. The hunter ran and ran and ran, until he ended up at the edge of a very steep cliff. His hopes were dim. Seeing no way out of his predicament, and with the bear closing in rather quickly, the hunter got down on his knees, opened his arms, and exclaimed, "Dear God! Please give this bear some religion!" The skies darkened and there was lightning in the air. Just a few feet short of the hunter, the bear came to an abrupt stop, and glanced around, somewhat confused. Suddenly, the bear looked up into the sky and said, "Thank you, God, for the food I''m about to receive...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An epileptic young woman named Camp Was seduced on her couch by a tramp But the first time he squeezed her She had a Grand seizure And broke both his balls and a lamp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A horny old trapper named Rex Liked the risks of wild porcupine sex. By incredible luck His dick never got stuck, But his nuts were just pitiful wrecks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat, when you sleep over someone''s house, you sleep OVER someone''s house!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you tried to rip the lips off a chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look on his face. "Say, mom, why is my bigger brother named "Mighty Storm"? "Because he was conceived during a mighty storm." "Why is my sister named "Cornflower"? "Well, your father and I were in a cornfield, when we made her." "And why is my other sister called "Moonchild"? "We were watching the moon landing while she was conceived." "Tell me, Torn Rubber, why are you so curious?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde decided to commit suicide by hanging herself from a tree in the park. A few days later, a man was walking his dog and spotted her hanging from the tree. He asks the blonde what she is doing and she replies, "I''m hanging myself." "You''re supposed to put the noose around your neck, not your waist," said the onlooker. "I tried that," replied the blonde, "but I couldn''t breathe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('zebra: 25 sizes bigger than an ''A'' bra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Russian Roulette, by Hugo First', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Lazy Boy, by Yu Doit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On clothes: do not iron while wearing. On a baby carriage: do not fold while in use.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an Iraqi force moving thru the desert. As they were approaching some mountains they heard (from over the mountains) "One U.S. Marine can take out 10 Iraqi fighters!" The General of the army sent out ten of his men to take care of the american, none of them came back after some shooting. Then he heard, "One U.S. Marine can take out 100 Iraqi fighters!" So the General sent out 100 of his men after a long time of shooting none of his men returned. Then he heard "One U.S. Marine can take out 1000 Iraqi fighters!" The General, angry now, sends 1000 fighters. After a very long time of shooting one man comes back. In his dying breath he said, "Don''t send anymore men! Its a trap, there are two of them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He''s great on the court, a sportswriter spoke of a college basketball player in a interview with his coach. "But how''s his academics?" "Why, he makes straight A''s," replied the coach. "Wonderful!" said the sportswriter. "Yes," agreed the coach, "but his B''s are a just little crooked."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many NCAA basketball players does it take to change a light bulb? Only one - but he gets money, a car, and three credit hours for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do soccer players drink? Penaltea!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren''t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes I am, I married the wrong man."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother-in-law was bitten by a mad dog in the street. "Oh, that''s terrible" "Yes, it was terrible to watch the dog die slowly in convulsions."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get holy water? You boil the hell out of it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Locomotive: A crazy reason for a crime!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father watched his young son practice baseball in the backyard by throwing the ball up and swinging at it. Time and time again the bat missed contact. The boy noticed his father watching, and said, "Wow, Dad! Aren''t I a great pitcher?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bumper sticker: BE KIND TO ANIMALS. HUG A HOCKEY PLAYER.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found a way to make a horse stand perfectly still. Place a bet on him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess for a coffee where upon the parrot squawks "And get me a whisky, you cow!" The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the parrot and forgets the coffee. When this omission is pointed out to her the parrot drains its glass and bawls, "And get me another whisky, you idiot". Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another whisky but still no coffee. Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the parrot''s approach "I''ve asked you twice for a coffee, go and get it now or I''ll kick you". The next moment, both he and the parrot have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards. Plunging downwards the parrot turns to him and says "For someone who can''t fly, you complain too much!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Bill and Tom went to a restaurant for dinner. As soon as the waiter took out two steaks, Bill quickly picked out the bigger steak for himself. Tom wasn''t happy about that: "When are you going to learn to be polite?" Bill: "If you had the chance to pick first, which one would you pick?" Tom: "The smaller piece, of course." Bill: "What are you whining about then? The smaller piece is what you want, right?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many consultants does it take to change a lightbulb? A: I''ll have an estimate for you a week from Monday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Excerpts from actual letters sent to landlords Could you please send someone to fix our bath tap? My wife got her toe stuck in it and it is very uncomfortable for us. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 5:30 his cock wakes me up, and it is getting too much. When the workmen were here, they put their tools in my wife''s new drawers and made a mess. Please send men with clean tools to finish the job and keep my wife happy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there was a woman who lost her cat named "LOVE." It was pretty dark outside and she lived in New York. So, thinking that he might be down the street, she put on her house-coat and went looking for him. When a police officer stopped to ask what she was doing, she said very honestly, "I''m looking for LOVE." The policeman arrested her on the spot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. I stopped caring about anniversaries when you stopped caring about cooking. 9. Today is our what? 8. Okay, let''s celebrate, but do we have to celebrate together? 7. I thought we only celebrated important events? 6. You can celebrate anniversaries with your next husband. 5. You don''t like what I pick out, so I thought, "Why bother?" 4. I got you a present worth a dollar for every time you were nice to me this year. Here''s a $5 gift certificate for McDonald''s. 3. If you want me to pretend like I care about our anniversary, I will. 2. You want to go out to dinner? Okay, okay, I''ll take you to Pizza Hut if it''ll shut ya up. 1. I thought you only had to celebrate anniversaries while you were still in love.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do u call, a hippopotamus that dances? A hiphopanominus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the square root of 69? Ate something (8....)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Santa have 3 gardens? So he can ho ho ho.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to think you were crazy, but now I can see your nuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Four, one to change it and the other three to deny it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many believable, competent, "just right for the job" presidential candidates does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: It''s going to be a dark 4 years, isn''t it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many art directors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Does it have to be a lightbulb?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do firemen use red suspenders? To hold their pants up!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you staple in the middle of the paper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid that she gets lost in a telephone booth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: You know what''s gross? A: When you look in a mirror!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the chicken cross the road? Because he was attempting to cross it when yo mamma got hungry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What do you call a 500 pound Russian that can bend you like a bendy straw? A:Sir', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and played all over? Black and White (the computer game)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many nerds does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to be the cunsultant. One to be the labor manager. Two to hire people. Four to actually screw in the lightbulb. Five to be the ladder and ten to be the company board of directors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn''t control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words, "Give me all your money or I''ll shoot," the man shouted, "That''s not what I said!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The cop got out of his and walked up to the kid who was stopped for speeding. He rolled down his window. "I''ve been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The guy replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Eight hour lunch, two dollar tip. 2. Ask, "Excuse me, are you a really bad singer, or a really bad actor?" 3. After he describes each special, you shout, "Garbage!" 4. Whenever he walks by, cough and mutter, "Minimum wage". 5. Every few seconds, yell, "More waffles, Cuomo!" 6. Insist that before ordering, you be allowed to touch the London broil. 7. Tie tablecloth around neck and say, "You wouldn''t charge Superman for dinner, would you?" 8. Every time you eat or drink, cough really hard. 9. As he walks by to the kitchen, scream, "He''s gonna spit in the chowder!" 10. Three words: eat the check.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t be afraid of the dog, said the lady to young Johnny, who was delivering her groceries. "You know the old proverb, ''A barking dog never bites?''" "Yes," replied young Johnny. "You know the proverb. I know the proverb. But does your dog know the proverb?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three little boys went into a candy store. "I want two cents worth of jelly beans," the first boy said to the clerk. The clerk frowned. The jelly beans were on the top self, and he didn''t like climbing up there just to sell two cents worth, but he did it. When he came down, he put away his ladder and turned to the second boy. "What will you have?" he asked. "I''ll have two cents worth of jelly beans, too," said the boy. Angrily, the clerk got the ladder and climbed up to get the jelly beans. While he was still up there, he turned to the third boy. "You don''t want two cents worth of jelly beans, do you?" asked the man. "No, sir," answered the third boy, so the man climbed down and put away the ladder. "Now, what do you want?" the clerk asked the boy. "A nickel''s worth of the jelly beans," replied the lad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Acquaintance: A person you know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. Bachelor: A guy who gets to keep all his take-home pay. Pedestrian: A father who has teenagers who can drive. Honesty: The fear of being caught. Zebra: A horse prisoner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fine-looking gentleman sat down in the main dining room of an expensive restaurant. He ordered a big dinner and spent an hour enjoying himself. After he was given the check, he summoned the head waiter. "Ah, my friend," he said, "that was a delicious meal! Perhaps you don''t remember that I was a guest at this same table just about a year ago. And at that time I couldn''t pay the check, so you, sir had me thrown out in full view of all the other diners and thrown into the gutter just as if I were a bum!" "I am so sorry, sir" said the head waiter. "But, you understand-" "Oh it''s quite all right!" interrupted the gentleman, but I''m afraid I''ll have to trouble you again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a herd of white people? Avalanche What do you call a herd of black people? Mudslide What do you call a herd of mexicans? Jailbreak!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NOTE: This is a true story of a real call to a computor company tech support. One day a guy calls tech support. this is how it went... Cust: Hello? TS: Hello Cust: Yeah, my cup holder broke and my computor is still under warranty, so I would like to get it replaced. TS: Ummm cup holder? Cust: yeah cup holder... TS: Ummm did you get it with a promotional offer? Cust: No TS: Umm are you sure you got the right company? Cust: Yeah TS: Ummm... im sorry if i sound confused, because i am. Cust: Well its square, and its on the front of the computor, and it comes out when you press a button... At this point the Tech support guy had to put the guy on hold, so he could finish laughing... The guy had broken his CD-rom drive, thinking it was a cup holder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy1: Thats a bunch of cows. Farmer: No, a herd. Guy1: Of course I''ve heard of cows. Farmer:.No, I mean the cow herd Guy1: I have no secrets from cows', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In school one day, the teacher decided that in science class she would teach about the elements. So she stood in the front of the class and said, "Children, if you could have one raw element in the world what would it be?" Little Stevie raised his hand and said, "I would want gold, because gold is worth a lot of money and I could buy a Porsche." The teacher nodded and called on little Susie. Little Susie said, "I would want platinum, because platinum is worth more than gold and I could buy a Corvette" The teacher smiled and then called on Little Johnny. Little Johnny stood up and said, "I would want silicon." The teacher said, "Why Johnny?" He responded by saying, "Because my mom has two bags of it and you should see all the sports cars outside our house!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends are like condoms, they protect you when things get hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my four-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, he looked at the old pages as he turned them. Then something fell out of the Bible and he picked up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that has been pressed in between pages. "Momma, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. With astonishment in the young boy''s voice he answered: "It''s Adam''s suit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you know when you''re REALLY ugly? A. Your dog humps your leg with his eyes closed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: Haven''t I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that''s why I don''t go there anymore. Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I''ll go to mine. Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I''m a female inpersonator. Man: Hey baby, what''s your sign? Woman: Do not enter. Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized. Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today. Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Woman: But would you stay there? Man: If I could see you naked, I''d die happy. Woman: If I saw you naked, I''d probably die laughing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was chatting with her next-door neighbor. "I feel really good today. I started out this morning with an act of unselfish generosity. I gave a five dollar bill to a bum." "You gave a bum five whole dollars? That''s a lot of money to just give away. What did your husband say about it?" "Oh, he thought it was the proper thing to do. He said, ''Thanks.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man, fond of practical jokes, decided late one night to send his friend a collect telegram which read, "I am perfectly well." A week later, the joker received a heavy parcel - collect - on which he had to pay considerable charges. Upon opening it, he found a big block of concrete which had this message, "This is the weight your telegram lifted from my mind."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While enjoying an early morning breakfast in a northern Arizona cafe, four elderly ranchers were discussing everything from cattle, horses, and weather to how things used to be in the "good old days." Eventually the conversation moved on to their spouses. One gentleman turned to the fellow on his right and asked, "Roy, aren''t you and your bride celebrating your 50th wedding anniversary soon?" "Yup, we sure are," Roy replied. "Well, are you gonna do anything special to celebrate?" another man asked. The old gentleman pondered this for a moment, then replied, "For our 25th anniversary, I took the misses to Tucson. For our 50th, I''m thinking about going down there again to pick her up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Happy Anniversery! 2.You''re wearing THAT to the party!!?? 3.Do I look fat in this? 4.You didn''t know it was my birthday today!? 5.Oh my god! Can''t we just be friends! 6.Listen honey we have to talk... I think, I''m pregnant. 7.Here''s 100 dollars! 8.Hey! Is it okay if some of my friends come over to watch football and we go crazy when our team loses. 9.Sweetie can we not do it tonight? 10.Honey I''m home! How have you been today?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Happy aniversery! 2. Do I look fat in this? 3. Heres 100 dollars! Buy whatever you want. 4. I think im pregnant. 5. Do you wanna come shopping with me and my friends? We''re going to Victoria''s Secret. 6. I''m cheating on you with 1 other man and 2 women. 7. Hunney... can we not do it tonight. I''m just not in the mood. 8. Do you just wanna go on a vacation just me and you? We can go to the Bahamas! 9. I''m sorry. 10. Whenever you wanna get divorced just tell me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hunny, you forgot to put down the toilet seat again. Oh my God! you don''t know how to fix a car. Wife says: How do I look? Man: Terrible, go change!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone. Man who run in front of car get tired. Man who run behind car get exhausted. Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day. Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ. Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok. Man with one chopstick go hungry. Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails. Panties not best thing on earth but next to best thing on earth. War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left. Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house. Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night. It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it. Man who drive like hell, bound to get there. Man who fart in church sit in own pew. Crowded elevator smell different to midget.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THE CLINTON Virus...(Gives you a 7-Inch Hard Drive with NO memory.) THE BOB DOLE (AKA: VIAGRA) virus...(Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy) THE LEWINSKY virus...(Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then emails your best friends about what it did). THE RONALD REAGAN virus...(Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored) THE MIKE TYSON virus...(Quits after two bytes) THE OPRAH WINFREY virus... (Your 300 mb hard drive shrinks to 100 mb, then slowly expands to restabilize around 200.) THE JACK KEVORKIAN virus...(Deletes all old files) THE PROZAC virus...(Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn''t care) THE JOEY BUTTAFUOCO virus...(Only attacks minor files) THE ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER virus...(Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back) and last but not least............... THE LORENA BOBBITT virus... (Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy, then discards it through Windows)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the fall in Garden of Eden, Adam was walking with his sons Cain and Abel. They passed by the ruins of the Garden of Eden. One of the boys asked, "What''s that?" Adam replied, "Boys, that''s where your mother ate us out of house and home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A preacher phoned the city''s newspaper. "Thank you very much," said he, "for the error you made when you announced my sermon topic for last Sunday. The topic I sent you was ''What Jesus Saw in A Publican.'' You printed it as ''What Jesus Saw in a Republican'' I had the biggest crowd of the year!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The crumbling, old church building needed remodeling, so the preacher made an impassioned appeal, looking directly at the richest man in town. At the end of the message, the rich man stood up and announced, "Pastor, I will contribute $1,000." Just then, plaster fell from the ceiling and struck the rich man on the shoulder. He promptly stood again and shouted, "Pastor, I will increase my donation to $5,000." Before he could sit back down, plaster fell on him again, and again he virtually screamed, "Pastor, I will double my last pledge." He sat down, and an larger chunk of plaster fell hitting him on the head. He stood once more and hollered, "Pastor, I will give $20,000!" This prompted a deacon to shout, "Hit him again, Lord! Hit him again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new pastor moved into town and went out one Saturday to visit his parishioners. All went well until he came to one house. It was obvious that someone was home, but no one came to the door even after he had knocked several times. Finally, he took out his card and wrote on the back: Revelation 3:20 and stuck it in the door. The next day, as he was counting the offering he found his card in the collection plate. Below his message was the notation Genesis 3:10. Revelation 3:20 reads: "Behold I stand at the door and knock. If any man hear my voice, and opens the door, I will come in to him, and will dine with him, and he with me." Genesis 3:10 reads: "And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, "Mama, I don''t want to go out there. It''s dark." The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. "You don''t have to be afraid of the dark," she explained. "Jesus is out there. He''ll look after you and protect you." The little boy looked at his mother real hard and asked, "Are you sure he''s out there?" "Yes, I''m sure. He is everywhere, and he is always ready to help you when you need him," she said. The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little. Peering out into the darkness, he called "Jesus? If you''re out there, would you please hand me the broom?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This husband and wife couldn''t have any children, so they went to the pastor and asked for prayer. The pastor prayed for them and annointed them with oil. Sure enough, about 9 months later they had triplet babies. The couple once again showed up at the pastor''s study and as soon as the woman saw the pastor she ran up to him, threw her arms around him and gave him the biggest hug. "What was that all about"? he asked. She replied, "I''m just glad you used three in one oil and not WD40."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson; "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say ''Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.''" Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At Sunday School, they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny, a child in the kindergarten class, seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam''s ribs. Later in the week, his mother noticed him lying as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny, what is the matter?" Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my side. I think I''m going to have a wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Do not say what you mean. Ever. 2. Cry. Cry often. 3. Bring things up that were said, done, or thought years, months, or decades ago...or with other boyfriends. 4. Make them apologize for everything. 5. Get mad at them for everything. 6. Demand to be called or e-mailed. Often. Whine when they don''t comply. 7. Use daddy as a weapon. Tell them about his gun collection, his quick trigger finger, and his affection for his Little Princess. 8. Be late for everything. Yell if they''re late. 9. Criticize the way they dress. 10. Talk about your ex-boyfriend 24/7. Then compare and contrast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandchildren are God''s reward for not killing your children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a rabbit were racing cabbage, who would win? The cabbage, because it''s a head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man traveling down a country road was forced to stop before a giant puddle covering the entire road. Looking to the side of the road, the man noticed a farmer leaning on a fence. "Think it''s safe to cross?" the man asked. "I reckon so," replied the farmer. The car was immediately swallowed by the puddle as the man drove in. In fact, it was so deep that he had to roll his window down to swim out of his car back to the surface. As his head broke the surface, the man said to the farmer, "I thought you said I could safely drive through this puddle!" "Well, shoot!" said the farmer, scratching his head. "It only come up chest-high on my ducks!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the surgeon came to see his blonde patient on the day after her operation, she asked him somewhat hesitantly just how long it would be before she could resume her sex life. "Uh, I hadn''t really thought about it," admitted the stunned surgeon. You''re the first one ever to ask that after a tonsillectomy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny goes up to his mother and asks, "Is God male or female?" After thinking for a moment, his mother responds, "Well, honey, God is both male and female." This confuses Little Johnny, so he asks, "Is God black or white?" "Well, God is both black and white." This further confuses him so he asks, "Is God gay or straight?" At this the mother is getting concerned, but answers nonetheless, "Honey, God is both gay and straight." At this Little Johnny''s face lights up with understanding and he triumphantly asks, "Mom, is God Michael Jackson?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a husband was chiding his beautiful blonde wife about leaving her keys in the ignition of her car. "If I take them out of the car I lose them," she reasoned. "Yes dear, but what if someone steals your car?" the husband countered. "Oh that''s okay," the wife chirped happily, "I keep a spare key in the glove box!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men were running for the same seat in their state senate. The two men had just finished meeting for lunch in a restaurant. Said the first man "I''m going to win the election because I put in a personal touch. For example, I left the waiter a ten dollar tip so that he would vote for me." "That''s nothing," replies the second man to the first, "I left the waiter a 5 cent tip, and told him that I was your campaign manager."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where should a dressmaker live? On the outskirts of the city.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the broom tired? It over swept.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American and Japanese were sitting next to each other on a plane. The American turned and asked the Japanese, "What kind of -ese are you?" The Japanese man answered "I''m sorry, I don''t know what you mean." "What kind of -ese are you?" the American repeated. The Japanese was showing obvious confusion. Irritated, the American explained, "Are you Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese, what?" "Oh, I''m Japanese." Soon after, the Japanese turned to the American and asked him what kind of -key he was. The American, now annoyed, replied, "What d''you mean, ''key''?" The Japanese asked again, "Are you a monkey, a donkey, or a Yankee?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Japanese eat little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. The French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or the Americans. CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what gets you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him ....what? A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a couple doing yard work, and the wife stops to go up and take a shower. The husband is looking for the rake and yells to his wife, who looks out of the upstairs bathroom window, "Where''s the rake?" She can''t hear him, so he points to his eye (I), points to his knee (need) and then makes raking motions. "What?" she yells, confused. So he goes through the whole routine again. She nods as if she understands and then points to her eye, squeezes her left breast, slaps her bum and then rubs her crotch. Her husband is somewhat confused, but totally aroused, so he quickly goes in the house, up the stairs, and into the bathroom. "What did you say?" She answered, "I said, ''Eye, left tit, behind, the bush.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student comes to a young professor''s office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, and kneels pleadingly. "I would do *anything* to pass this exam." She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, and gazes meaningfully into his eyes. "I mean..." she repeats, "...I would do...*anything*." He returns her gaze. "Anything?" "*Anything*." His voice softens. "*Anything*??" "*Anything*." His voice turns to a whisper. "Would you...*study*?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An angry wife met her husband at the door. She could smell alcohol on his breath and there was lipstick on his collar. "I assume," she snarled, "that there''s a reason you''re waltzing in here at six o''clock in the morning?" "There is," he replied. "Breakfast."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a hurry to get a special dinner party, the guest speaker arrived and sat down, only to realize he''d forgotten his false teeth. He explained his dilemma to the man sitting next to him. The man said, "No problem," reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of false teeth. "Try these,"he said. "Too loose," the speaker said. The man pulled out another pair. "Too tight," the speaker told him. "I have one more pair." The speaker tried them and they fit perfectly. With that, he ate his meal and gave his speech. When the dinner was over, he went to thank the man who''d helped him. "Where''s your office?" he inquired. "I''m looking for a good dentist." The man replied: "I''m not a dentist. I''m an undertaker."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you invented the solar powered flashlight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD), The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist. The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming. The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I''m a rabbit! I''m a rabbit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher was teaching a class about the big bang theory. She asked Billy to go outside and observe his surroundings. She then asked... "Billy did you see the sky?" "Yes", said Billy. "Did you see the sun?" "Yes", said the boy. "Did you see God?" "No", said the boy. The Teacher said, "So God really isn''t there." A little girl started to ask Billy some questions. "Did you see the sky?" "Yes" was the reply "Did you see the sun?" Again, "yes" was the answer. "Do you see the teacher''s brain? Because according to her, she doesn''t have one!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was driving her kids to school one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children began discussing the dog''s duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster. "No," said another, "he''s just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a close. "They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was at the beach with his children when his four-year-old daughter ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore, where a seagull lay dead in the sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the daughter asked. "He died and went to Heaven," the dad replied. The little girl thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him back down?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy had just got home from Sunday School and mom was cooking lunch. "Mommy, is it true that before you''re born you''re just dust and after you die you go back to being dust?" "That''s right son, why?" "Well that''s just what they said at church today." "Run up stairs and wash your hands son, lunch will be ready in a few minutes." About 10 minutes went by and she called out for him to come down. "I''ll be there in a minute." As they were about to sit down at the table, the little boy asked again about being dust before being born and after you die. Once again mother said yes son. The little boy looked at her and said, "then you better get up to my room pretty quick, because something under my bed is either coming or going!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of religious service when she was startled by an intruder. As she caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables, she yelled, "Stop....Acts 2:38!" (Turn from your sin). The burglar stopped dead in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done. As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar, "Why did you just stand there? All she did was yell a scripture to you." "Scripture?" replied the burglar. "She said she had an AXE and two 38''s!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 4-year-old boy was asked to return thanks before Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food. He gave thanks for the turkey, the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies, the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and everyone waited--and waited. After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank God for the broccoli, won''t he know that I''m lying?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he knew the answer so quickly. "How do you know that?" "Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Preacher said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lord, grant me the strength that I may not fall Into the clutches of cholesterol; At polyunsaturates, I''ll never mutter, For the road to Hell is paved with butter And cake is cursed and cream is awful And Satan is hiding in every waffle. Beelzebub is a chocolate drop, And Lucifer is a lollipop, Teach me the evils of hollandaise Of pasta and globs of mayonnaise; And crisp fried chicken from the south Lord, if you love me, shut my mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked his wife what she''d like for her 40th birthday. "I''d love to be six again," she replied. On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early, and off they went to a local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear, everything there was! Wow! Five hours later, she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Right to a McDonald''s they went, where her husband ordered her a Happy Meal along with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake. Then, it was off to a movie - the latest Disney; and what a fabulous adventure! Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed. He leaned over and lovingly asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being six again?" With one eye opened she said "You idiot, I meant my dress size."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl and her father decided to go to church, because her father wanted to introduce her to the Christian World. As they sat down, a collection plate begins to be passed around. As the plate came to the girl''s father, he searches his pockets for money. Then his daughter whispers in his ear, "Don''t worry Daddy, I''m already free and covered.... I''m under 5."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a man and his wife decide to go out on a date. They get all dolled up, call the cab, and put the cat out. When the cab arives, they head out the door just as the cat darts back inside. The man head backs in to chase out the cat, and his wife heads to the cab. Not wanting to let on that no one would be home that night, she explains to the driver, "He''s just going back in to say good-night to my mother." In a few minutes, the man returns to explain, "Sorry it took me so long. The old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Friday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her class. She told them that she would read a quote and the first student to correctly identify who said it would receive the rest of the day off. She started with "This was England''s finest hour." Little Suzy instantly jumped up and said, " Winston Churchill." "Congratulations," said the teacher "you may go home." The teacher then said, "Ask not what your country can do for you." Before she could finish this quote, another young lady belts out, "John F. Kennedy". "Very good" says the teacher, "you may go." Irritated that he has missed two golden opportunities, Little Johnny said, "I wish those girls would just shut up." Upon overhearing this comment, the outraged teacher demanded to know who said it. Johnny instantly rose to his feet and said, "Bill Clinton. I''ll see you Monday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50." The second boy says, "That''s nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100." The third boy says, "I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon. And it takes eight people to collect all the money!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young West Virginian girl wanted to go to college at UVA. But her father said "No way! You''re going to By-God West Virginia Univ." Well, she got her way and she went to UVA. The first semester went by, and she wrote home that she was getting married, to a man from Richmond, VA named Clarence. Her father said "I''ll be damned if my daughter is marrying a man from Richmond, you''re marrying a By-God West Virginian boy," so he sent his two sons to UVA to get their sister. In a couple of days they returned. The confused father asked "Where is your sister?" They replied "We were almost there Dad, but we got to this overpass with a sign that said ''Clarence 13''6'''' so we turned around and drove the hell out of there!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''ve had too much coffee when... You can type sixty words a minute with your feet Instant coffee takes too long You chew on other people''s fingernails You answer the door, before people knock You sleep with your eyes open You go to sleep, just so you can wake up and smell the coffee You don''t even wait for the water to boil anymore You''re the employee of the month at Starbucks and you don''t even work there You help your dog chase its tail You lick your coffeepot clean You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee You''re so wired you pick up FM radio You have a picture of your coffee mug, on your coffee mug!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes on vacation to a tropical island. As soon as he gets off the plane, he hears drums. He thinks "Wow, this is cool." He goes to the beach, he hears the drums, he eats lunch, he hears drums, he goes to a luau, he hears drums. He TRIES to go to sleep, he hears drums. This goes on for several nights, and gets to the point where the guy can''t sleep at night because of the drums. Finally, he goes down to the front desk. When he gets there, he asks the manager, "Mister, that''s it!! Why won''t those drummers stop?! I can''t get any sleep!" The manager replies, "No! The drums must NEVER stop. It''s terrible if the drums stop drumming." "Why?" "When drums stop... bass solo begins."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? You. You who? Yoo hoo, I''m right over here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two small boys, one catholic and one protestant get lost in the woods. Darkness comes down and they near a monastery. Upon entering they are asked their faith, telling the head monk their religions. The Catholic lad gets the best of treatment, good food, a good bed near the fireplace. The protestant lad however gets a bowl of cold gruel, and is told to sleep by the drafty door to keep the cold out of the room. In the morning the head monk asks the boys how it was. "I dreamt I was in heaven, Father" said the Catholic boy. "It was just wonderful." "I dreamt that I was in hell " said the protestant boy. "And what was that like?" said the holy father. "Just like this place, couldn''t get near the fire for catholics!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she hauls ass, she has friends come help!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she walks in front of the T.V., you miss 5 minutes of your show!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don''t get wet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she goes swimming she gives the pool stretch marks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back party!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she puts on her lipstick with a paint-roller!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she puts mayonnaise on aspirin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she pulls up a chair to an all-u-can-eat buffet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she made weight watchers go blind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she looks like she''s smuggling a Volkswagen!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An attorney was sitting in his office late one night, when the Devil appeared before him. The Devil told the lawyer, "I have a proposition for you. You can win every case you try, for the rest of your life. Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money. All I want in exchange is your soul, your wife''s soul, your children''s souls, the souls of your parents, grandparents, and parents-in-law, and the souls of all of your friends and law partners." The lawyer thought about this for a moment, then asked, "So, what''s the catch?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two lawyers were in a coffee shop talking. One of the lawyers names was Thomas Ulaiy (A-lie). After a while their conversation became rather morbid, and they started to talk about what they were going to have on their tomb stones. Thomas said the he wasn''t going to have his name put on his tomb stone, instead he was going have "Here lies the body of an honest lawyer!", he said enthusiastically. "Why are you going to have that?" asked his friend. "Well", said Thomas, "When people are walking through the cemetery, and they see... ''Here Lies The Body of an Honest Lawyer'', they''ll say "Yeah, that''s Ulaiy".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A middle-aged couple had two beautiful teenage daughters and decided to try one last time for a son. After months, the wife finally got pregnant and after nine months, bore a healthy baby boy. The elated father rushed to the nursery to check on his infant. He was horrified to see the ugliest child he had ever saw. He went to his wife and said that there was no way he could be the father of that child. "Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered." Then he gave her a stern look and asked, "Have you been fooling around on me?" The wife smiled sweetly, "Not this time..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mortician was examining Mr. Zeron''s body before sending it to be cremated. He discovered the longest private part he had ever seen on Zeron. He felt it a pity to cremate him with it, so, apologising to the corpse, the mortician used his tools to remove the tremendously huge private part. The mortician stuffed the prize possesion into his briefcase and took it home to show his wife. "I have something to show you that you won''t believe," he said and opened his briefcase. Upon seeing it, his wife cried, "Oh my God! Zeron is dead!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks up to a bartender one night and asked for a beer. "Certainly, sir. That''d be one cent." The guy was surprised at the incredible price. The guy, unable to believe such prices, looked up the menu and ordered a nice juicy T-bone steak with chips, peas and a fried egg. "Certainly, sir. That''d be five cents including the beer." The guy couldn''t trust the bartender no more and called for the manager. "The manager''s upstairs with my wife." The guy curiously asked why he was with his wife. "He do my business, I''ll do his."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young 6-month pregnant lady boarded a bus and took a seat. She noticed a young man smiling at her and got humiliated on account of her condition. She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She moved again and then on her fourth move he burst out laughing. She had him arrested. The case came before the court, and when asked why he acted in such a manner, the man replied, "When the lady boarded the bus I couldn''t help noticing she was pregnant. She sat under an advertisement which read, ''Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins.'' Then she moved under one that read, ''Sloans Liniments Remove Swelling.'' I was even more amused when she sat under a shaving advertisement which read, ''William''s Stick Did The Trick.'' I could not control myself any longer when on the fourth move she sat under an advertisement which read, ''Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident.''" He won the case.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a train compartment, there are 3 men and a ravishing lady. Conversation broke out and turned erotic. The lady proposed, "If each of you would give me $1, I would show you my legs." The men, charmed by her beauty, handed over the money. The lady pulled her dress up a little to show her legs. She followed, "If each of you would give me $10, I would show you my thighs." Driven by lust, the men forked out the money and the lady pulled up her dress more to show her thighs. The men, getting excited, pulled off their coats. The lady then said, "If each of you would give me $100, I would show you where I had my appendicitis operated on." The men, being men, naturally surrendered their money for more. The lady turned to the window and pointed at a hospital, "There!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman had an appointment in the morning with her gynecologist and was running late. She hadn''t had the time to give herself a proper washup so she took a washcloth and gave herself a wash in ''that area'' in front of the sink. She threw the cloth into the wash basket after making sure she was presentable and drove to her appointment. She was silent throughout the checkup and ignored the gynecologist when he said, "My... We have taken a little extra effort this morning, haven''t we?" It was only until after the day was over when her daughter called to ask if she had seen where her washcloth was. The woman told her to get a fresh piece from the cabinet but the daughter said, "No, I need that one that was here by the sink. It had all my glitter and sparkles in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the usual tip? a man growled when, Brett, a college boy delivered his pizza. "Well," Brett continued, "this is my first delivery, but the other guys said that if I got a quarter out of you, I''d be doing great." "Is that so?" grunted the man. "In that case, here''s five dollars." "Thanks," Brett said, "I''ll put it in my college fund." "By the way, what are you studying?" inquired the man. And Brett replied, "Applied psychology."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy and girl are playing in a sandbox. The little boy has to go to take a pee and he was told by his mother to always be polite and not to talk about private matters in public. At first he holds it in because he does not know what to say to the little girl to excuse himself. Then he remembers what his Mom had said at the restaurant to excuse herself from the table, so he turns to the little girl and says, "Will you excuse me, I have to go powder my nose." And, saying that, he leaps out of the sandbox and runs to the washroom. When he returns, the little girl looks up at him and asks, "Did you powder your nose?" "Yes," said the little boy, stepping back into the sandbox. "Well, then," says the little girl, "you''d better close your purse because your lipstick is hanging out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady walks into a shop that sells VERY expensive Persian rugs. She browses around, then spots the perfect rug and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the texture of the rug, she farts loudly. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and hopes a sales person does not pop up right now. As she turns back, there, standing next to her is a salesman. "Good day, madam. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely rug?" He answers, "Madam, if you farted just touching it, you are very likely to shit when you hear the price!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What would you do w/out your memories ? A: Forget', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the difference between a fish and a piano ? A: You can''t tuna fish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the seismologist say when he messed up? A: It''s not my fault.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What animal talks the most? A. The yak.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant and some peanut butter? A: Either an elephant that sticks to the roof of your mouth, or peanut butter that never forgets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did judge say when the skunk came in the court ? A: Odor in the court.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep an idiot in suspense? Keep scrolling down! Not far now! Keep going! Solve this problem while you wait for the answer to pop up. 6! Not enough? Solve this! (Pi)! The answer will pop up shortly... Whoops, there was a mistake. Go back to the 2nd line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations across the United States and rest of the world. Sign on a repair shop door: WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN''T WORK) Sign at Norfolk farm gate: BEWARE! I SHOOT EVERY TENTH TRESPASSER AND THE NINTH ONE HAS JUST LEFT Seen during a conference: FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN''T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE FIRST FLOOR', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men died and went to Heaven. St. Peter greeted them, and said "I''m sorry, gentlemen, but your mansions aren''t ready yet. Until they are, I can send you back to Earth as whatever you want to be." "Great!" said the first guy, "I want to be an eagle soaring above beautiful scenery!" "No problem," replied St. Peter, and POOF! The guy was gone. "And what do you want to be," St. Peter asked the other guy. "I''d like to be one cool stud!" was the reply. "Easy," replied St. Peter, and the other guy was gone. After a few months, their mansions were finished, and St. Peter sent an angel to fetch them back. "You''ll find them easily," he says, "One of them is soaring above the Grand Canyon, and the other one is on a snow tire somewhere in Detroit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar. A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo -- of handcuffs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl spoke to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it is a very large mammal, its throat is very small. The little girl said, "But how can that be? Jonah was swallowed by a whale." Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human. "It is physically impossible!" she said. Undaunted, the little girl said, "Well, when I get to heaven I will ask Jonah." To this, the teacher said, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then YOU ask him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store''s opening time, in front of the store. A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colourful curse. On the man''s second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, and knocked around a bit, and then thrown at the end of the line again. As he got up, he said to the person at the end of the line, "That does it! If they hit me one more time, I won''t open the store!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day. "My name is Billy. What''s yours?" asked the first boy. "Tommy," replied the second. "My Daddy''s an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Billy. Tommy replied, "My Daddy''s a lawyer." "Honest?" asked Billy. "No, just the regular kind", replied Tommy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two white horses fell in the mud and three came out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb, you drowned when you were bathed in sunlight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This young girl about 7 year old had a dog which she took for a walk everyday after school. Well, one day her dog was in heat, so her father told her that she couldn''t walk the dog for a week or so because it wasn''t feeling well. His daughter became very upset and cried for most of the night. The next day the father came up with a plan. He put some gasoline on the dogs rear end to hide the smell from the male dogs. Well when the girl got home she was happy to find that she could now walk her dog again. About an hour later, the girl returned without the dog. The father asked, "What on earth has happened to the dog?" The girl replies, "Well she ran out of gas a few blocks back, and is being pushed home by another dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny tried out for the school play. The teacher gave him these lines to practice: "Hark! A pistol shot! There lies a lady with hope in her soul. I think I''ll snatch a kiss and run into the forest. By William Shakespeare." Little Johnny practiced and practiced and did the lines perfectly every time. The night of the play it was his turn to speak. This is what he said: "Hark! A pigeon shit! There lies a lady with soap in her hole. I think I''ll kiss her snatch and run into the forest. By William Snakeshit... Horseshit... Oh, shit! I didn''t want to be in this damn play anyway!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? "You may have graduated, but I have several degrees."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I see London, I see France, I see your underpants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy and his older sister were building paper airplanes when his sister said, "We should stop building planes now and play with the ones we''ve got. We don''t need to waste any more paper." "Why?" "Because if we use too much paper we''ll lose all the trees, and everyone will die.." "Because we don''t have any paper?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning. The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don''t have to wait as long to get our coffee." The husband said, "You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee." The wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the bible that man should do the coffee." The husband replies, "I can''t believe that, show me." So she fetched the bible, and opened the New Testament and shows him the top of several pages, that it indeed says........"HEBREWS"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of soup weighs 1000 pounds? Won ton soup!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 expecting mothers were talking in their doctors office, about the sex of their babies. The first mother said, "I''m having a boy." "How can you be so sure?" asked the other two. "Well" said the first, "my husband was on top." The second replied, "If that''s the case then I''m having a girl because I was on top." The third started to cry. The first two asked her what was wrong. "I''m going to have a puppy" she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer, a carpenter and an astronaut were having drinks in a bar when suddenly one gets up and hits the other. "who hit me?" "It wasn''t me." "I didn''t see too much either." "It must have been the dog" "What dog?" "I''m blind so I couldn''t see a dog." "Doh, that means I hit myself." "hahahahaha how strange I thought you guys had hit me. Sorry about that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man drove up to a beautiful lady at a stop light. She was in a nice Porsche. He asks her, "Excuse me, miss, you have Grey Poupon?" "I sure hope not, I just got my car waxed; damn those birds."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My computer is like Britney Spears; cheap, white, and plastic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A carpet layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady. He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he''d lost his cigarettes. In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump. ''''No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes,'''' he said to himself. He proceeded to get out his hammer and flattened the hump. As he was cleaning up, the lady came in. ''''Here,'''' she said, handling him his pack of cigarettes. ''''I found them in the hallway.'''' ''''Now,'''' she said, ''''if only I could find my parakeet. ''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Laughter is like changing a baby''s diaper... It doesn''t permanently solve any problems, but it makes things more acceptable for a while!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It ain''t easy to be a dick; I''ve got a head I can''t think with, An eye I can''t see out of. I have to hang around with two nuts all the time. My closest neighbour is a real asshole. My best friend is a pussy. And every time I get excited, I throw up; And worst of all, my owner beats me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a sweltering hot day when three guys, Arnold, Bobby and Calvin, were walking along a never-ending path in a park. Arnold: It sure is hot! I''d like a vanilla cone very much. Bobby: Yeah, my shirt''s soak with sweat. I''d give 10 bucks for a strawberry cone. Calvin: Well I''d give 20 bucks for any cone. Arnold picks something off the ground saying, "Pay up Cal, here''s a pine cone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('See if you can find the hidden image in the group of characters below. It takes some concentration, but it''s worth it. Don''t cheat by scrolling down before you look at it. Have fun! You''ll be surprised when you see what it is... {{{{{{{===**++++*****+++++++++++????????/// //////////%\\\ @@@@@444+=+=****&^"""""}}}|||||||]]] xxxxxxxx<<<<<>>>>>>>xxxxxxxx ~~~~~~*********~~~~~~~~ ====||\\/////////*****<><><><><><><>{}{}{} %%%%%%%%%%%% $$$&&$$&$$===~|~|~|~|====++ Most people find it easiest to put your nose right up to the screen, then slowly back away while continuing to stare. If you still don''t see it scroll down for the answer...... ANSWER: It''s a picture of..........NOTHING!!! I can''t believe you fell for that! I hope someone walked by and saw you looking like a complete fool with your eyes crossed and your nose against the screen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde run out of shampoo? She kept following the instructions: lather, rinse, repeat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('News Flash : Today the world was stunned by the news of the death of the Energizer Bunny. He was six years old. Authorities believe that the death occurred approximately 8:42 PM last evening. Best known as the irritating pink bunny that kept going, and going and going, "Pinkie" as he was known to his friends and family was alone at the time of his death. An emergency autopsy was performed early this morning. The Chief Medical Examiner concluded that the cause of death was acute cardiac arrest induced by sexual over-stimulation. Apparently, someone had put the bunny''s batteries in backwards and he kept coming, and coming, and coming...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Late one night in the Washington D.C., a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money!" he demanded. Indignant, the affluent man replied, "You can''t do this - I''m a US Congressman!" "In that case," replied the robber, "give me MY money!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a man trying to cross the street. As he steps off the curb a car comes screaming around the corner and heads straight for him. The man walks faster, trying to hurry across the street, but the car changes lanes and is still coming at him. So the guy turns around to go back, but the car changes lanes again and continues in his direction. By now, the car is so close and the man so scared that he just freezes and stops in the middle of the road. The car gets really close, then swerves at the last possible moment and screeches to a halt right next him. The driver rolls down the window. The driver is a squirrel. The squirrel says to the man says, "See, it''s not as easy as it looks, is it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three guys that won a contest. They would get to spend a year in a room with anything they chose. The first guy loves to have sex. So they put him in a room for a year with over 200 girls to have sex with for a year. The second guy loved to get drunk. So they put him in a room with every beer there ever was to drink for a year. The third guy loved to smoke. So they put him in a room with every kind of cigarette there was to smoke. Two hours later they hear the guy that loved to smoke banging on the door but they say fuck him, he''s in there for a year. A year later they let them out. They first guy came out and he could barely walk, after how many times he had sex. The second guy came out and couldn''t walk because he was so drunk. The third guy came out crying. They asked him why he was banging on the door and why he was crying. He said, " I forgot my lighter!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent survey, 60 percent of respondents said the cities they live in are noisier now than they were five years ago. The other 40 percent didn''t hear the question.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Dad, $chool i$ really $well. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. I have $o much $tuff, I $imply can''t think of anything I need. $o if you like, $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you. Love Your $on Dear Son, I kNOw astroNOmy, ecoNOmy, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep an hoNOrs student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can''t study eNOugh. Love, Dad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Dishwasher. Dishwasher Who? Dishwasher whay I sphoke vhefore I hafe fawse feeth (This was the way I spoke before I had false teeth)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men are like... Placemats. They only show up when there''s food on the table. Men are like... Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion. Men are like... Government Bonds. They take so long to mature. Men are like... Lava Lamps. Fun to look at but not so bright. Men are like... Bank accounts, without a lot of money, they don''t generate much interest. Men are like... High heels, they''re easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever notice how many of women''s problems can be traced to the male gender? MENstruation MENopause MENtal breakdown GUYnecology (Gynecology) HIMmorrhoid (Hemorrhoid)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three boys with names Shutup, Manners and Trouble. They were walking around town when they realized Trouble was missing. Shutup and Manners searched and searched but failed to find the missing boy. At a lost, they went up to the Neighbourhood Police Post. Manners had to go to the toilet so Shutup went up and spoke to the policeman there. Policeman=P Shutup=S P: Hi little boy, what''s your name? S: Shutup P: What a rude boy! Where are your manners? S: At the toilet P: What are you talking about? Are you looking for trouble here? S: Yes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple were at the beach watching a volleyball game when they notice a pair of adults nearby kissing passionately, the woman running her hands down the man''s arms, massaging erotically while nibbling on his ear. The couple was intrigued yet they don''t want to miss the exciting match so the girl asked her boyfriend if she should watch the match or them. The guy replied, "Watch them. You already know how to play volleyball."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An agitated patron calls on to the blond waiter and inquired why there was a footprint on his meal. "Well," the innocent-looking blond waiter replied. "You rushed in here, ordered an omelette and asked me to step on it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five toads arrived at the Heaven''s Gates. The man in charge asked for each toad''s name and what they had been doing. The first gave his name and said he had been going in and out of puddles. The man let him through the gate. He interrogated the next three toads and all three too said they had been going in and out of puddles. Since there was nothing wrong, the man let them all in. Then he reached the last toad. She was a pretty one, in toad''s sense, and when asked what her name was, she replied, "Puddles."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond was using a pager for the first time. When the operator instructed her to key in "10" to leave a voice message, she followed and after the beep, said, "Excuse me, may I speak to Zeron please?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rich and Kim, a couple, were in a room when Kim asked Rich if he would ever forget her. He replied that he would never forget her. Then she said, "Knock-knock!" and, of course, Rich said, "Who''s there?" "See!" she exclaimed sulkily. "You have forgotten already."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman went to shop for a mirror when she chanced upon an expensive one. When she asked why, the salesman told her it was magical, that if you recited a rhyme in front of it, your wishes would come true. The woman bought it and hung it on the door at home. Mirror Mirror on the door Make my busts a forty-four The woman instantly had a huge chest. She told her husband but he was in doubt. He went to the mirror then and said: Mirror Mirror on the door Make my penis hit the floor His legs were missing, leaving stumps mid-thigh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man selling hats went to a jungle for a rest. A monkey came and stole a hat. The man couldn''t catch the monkey. He realized the monkey followed the man''s actions. He threw the hat to the ground. The monkey threw the hat to the ground. He picked up both hats and went away. The man then had a grandson who followed the family business and sold hats. The grandson went to a jungle to rest while selling hats. A monkey came and stole a hat. The grandson thought of his grandfather''s story, and threw the hat on the floor. The monkey ran and picked up the hat. It then slapped the grandson, saying, "You think you''re the only one having a grandfather?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so old, her memories are in black and white!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a strong preaching on the devil. One said to the other, "What do you think about all this Satan stuff?" The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It''s probably just your dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young , attractive woman thought she might have some fun with a stiff-looking military man at a cocktail party, so she walked over and asked him, "Major, when was the last time you had sex?" "1956," was his reply. "No wonder you look so uptight!" she exclaimed. "Major, you need to get out more!" "I''m not sure I understand you," he answered, glancing at his watch, ..."It''s only 2014 now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma''s like a mail box, open all day and all night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A king is sentencing his prisoners. The first person enters and says that he stole a horse. "Hang him," the king yells. The second person comes in and says he stole old ladies'' purses. "You heartless fiend! Shoot him" the king growls. The third person comes in and says that he pirated software on the internet and stole billions of dollars from internet companies. "Well what the heck are you guys doing just standing there?", he tells his men, "Hire him already!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a man held a contest. The winner would be who could get the most ping pong balls in one day. The first man comes back with 100. The second man comes back with 110. The third man comes back with a whole ton of bruises. The men ask him why he didn''t collect any ping pong balls and why he was bruised. He said, "Ping pong balls? I thought he said King Kong''s balls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a little boy who had just learned to count on his fingers. One day his uncle came to visit and the boy was anxious to show off his newly acquired skill. He told the uncle to ask him an addition question. So the uncle asked, "What is three plus four?" The little boy counts it out on his fingers and said, "Seven." The uncle said, "Listen kid, you can''t count it out on your hands because someday when you are in school, a teacher will get mad at you for it. Now put your hands in your pockets." So the little boy put his hands in his pockets and his uncle asked, "What is five plus five?" The uncle saw movement in the boys pockets, then the boy said, "Eleven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redneck couple had lived together in the backwoods for over fifty years. To celebrate their fiftieth anniversary, the man took her to a large city and they checked into a plush hotel. The woman said to the bellman, "We refuse to settle for such a small room. No windows, no bed, and no air conditioning." "But, madam," replied the bellman. "Don''t ''But madam'' me," she continued. "You can''t treat us like we''re a couple of fools just because we don''t travel much, and we''ve never been to the big city, and never spent the night at a hotel. I''m going to complain to the manager." "Madam," the bellman said, "this isn''t your room; this is the elevator!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant woman goes into a coma moments after she gives birth to twins, one boy and one girl. When she awakens, several days later, she cries out frantically to see her children. The doctors come to her, and the first thing she asks is "How are my children?" "Fine" says the doctor, your brother named them. She thinks to herself, Oh no, my brother''s an idiot. "What did he name them?" she asks the doctor. "He named the girl Denise" said the doctor. Well, maybe I misjudged my brother, Denise isn''t such a bad name, she realizes. "What did he name the boy?" Replies the doctor "Denephew."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After being with her all evening, the man couldn''t take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave if something like this happened. When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died." "Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn''t, mine would have had to!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a jewelry store, a young man bought an expensive locket as a present for his girlfriend. "Don''t you want her name engraved upon it?" asked the jeweler. The young man thought for a moment, and then, ever the pragmatic, steadfastly replied, "No, just engrave it: To My One And Only Love. That way, if we break up and she throws it back to me in anger, I can use it again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker had for Christmas? A. He felt his presence!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How did the blond injure herself raking leaves? A. She fell out of the tree!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What did Stevie Wonder say about the cheese grater he got for Christmas? A. It was the scariest book he had ever read!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American. an Englishman and a Chinese man were all taking part in a quiz contest. One question asked them was to fill in a blank in a song title and then spell the word. The song title was ''Old Macdonald had a ----''. The American was first to answer - he said ''ranch'', spelt R-A-N-C-H. "Wrong" said the quiz master. The Englishman answered next - he said ''estate'', spelt E-S-T-A-T-E. "Wrong" said the quiz master. Then the Chinese man answered - he said ''farm''. "Please spell it" said the quiz master. "E - I - E - I - O"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were any more pointless, you would be a circle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your IQ was any lower you would trip on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat when she sits down in class she sits by everyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat when I put her on the family tree the branch broke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat her belt size is the equator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman went to a wishing well and wished that she could become a better driver. So she turned into a man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many Lizzie''s does it take to screw up a light bulb A: I Dunno, but it only takes one to screw up a graduation ( from movie lizzie McGuire: she ruins junior high graduation)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blond who tried to hijack a submarine? She demanded $100,000 and a parachute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know something is wrong with today''s educational system when you figure out that of the three R''s, reading, writing, and arithmetic, only one actually starts with an R.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s chilly in here, the wealthy customer sniffed. "Will you please turn down the air conditioner?" "No problem sir," said the waiter. After a few minutes, the man flagged the server again. "Now I''m too warm." "All right," said the waiter. But soon the customer was chilly again. Finally a patron at a nearby table whispered to the waiter, "I commend you for your patience. That guy is certainly keeping you busy." "No he''s not," the waiter said with a shrug. "We don''t even have an air conditioner."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These two poor kids go to a birthday party at a rich kid''s house. The kid is so rich that he has his own swimming pool, and all the kids go in. As they''re changing afterwards, one of the poor kids says to the other one, "Did you notice how small the rich kid''s penises were?" "Yeah," says his mate, "It''s probably because they''ve got toys to play with."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill pilled up a stool at his favorite bar and announced, "My wife Suzie must love me more than any woman has ever loved any man!" "What makes you say that?" the bartender inquired. "Last week," Bill explained, "I had to take a couple of sick days from work. Suzie was so thrilled to have me around that every time the milkman and the post office guy came by, she''d run down the driveway, waving her arms and hollering, `My old man''s home! My old man''s home!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Michael Jackson and plastic bags have in common? They are both made out of plastic and are dangerous for children to play with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the airport for a business trip, I settled down to wait for the boarding announcement at Gate 35. Then I heard the voice on the public address system saying, "We apologize for the inconvenience, but Delta Flight 570 will board from Gate 41." So my family picked up our luggage and carried it over to Gate 41. Not ten minutes later the public address voice told us that Flight 570 would in fact be boarding from Gate 35. So, again, we gathered our carry-on luggage and returned to the original gate. Just as we were settling down, the public address voice spoke again: "Thank you for participating in Delta''s physical fitness program.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, "Wow, these seats are big!" The person next to him answered, "Everything is big in Texas." When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!" The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas." After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender replied, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident. Scared to death, the blind man started shouting, "Don''t flush, don''t flush!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cartoon characters does it take to screw in a light bulb? nine - three to find a light bulb, three to figure out how to remove the old one, three to screw it in, and all of them to complicate it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know, your computer hates you? When it grows and pop ups.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many animals can you fit into a pair of pantyhose? Now, think about it..... Ready??? ARE YOU SURE??? A: 10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 ass, 1 beaver, an unknown number of hares, and a fish no one can find.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know that you''re a computer geek? You catch a computer virus and take a virus scanning pill every week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What exactly does the government do? They seem to complicate all the simple things while trying to do the opposite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was an elderly couple. Next door, there lived a Peeping Tom. One day, the couple received a phone call. The woman said, "Fred! Peeping Tom tells us to shut the blinds or he''ll call the police!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day my wife was changing my daughter''s diaper, and my 3 year old son walked in and saw her and asked, "Mommy, where is her thingy?" I almost had a heart attack, laughing so hard that day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many worms does it take to screw in a light bulb? What kind of an idiot thinks worms can screw in light bulbs?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know that you''re a really boring person when someone steals your identity and then tries to give it back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into the ladies department of a store and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I''d like to buy a bra for my wife." "What type of bra?" asked the clerk. "Type?" inquires the man, "There is more than one type?" "Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color and material imaginable. "Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from." Relieved, the man asked about the types. The saleslady replied "There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer?" Now befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them. The saleslady responded, "It is all really quite simple... The Catholic type supports the masses. The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen, The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright, and the Baptist makes mountains out of mole hills."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Said the pig to his pop, "There''s the candy shop. Oh, please Let''s go inside." "And I promise I won''t make a kid of myself if you give me a people-back ride."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The idiots we have today. They''re so stupid they make turkeys seem smart. They even make sponges seem smarter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a man sitting at a bar just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half an hour. Then, a big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I''ll buy you another drink. I just can''t stand seeing a man crying." "No, it''s not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I''m late to my office. My boss, in an outrage, fires me. When I leave the building to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police say they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away. I go home and when I get there, I find my wife sleeping with the gardener. I leave home and come to this bar. And when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, "You look terrible. What''s the problem?" "My mother died in August," he said, "and left me $25,000." "Gee, that''s tough," he replied. "Then in September," the friend continued, "My father died, leaving me $90,000." "Wow. Two parents gone in two months. No wonder you''re depressed." "And last month my aunt died, and left me $15,000." "Three close family members lost in three months? How sad." "Then this month," continued, the friend, "absolutely nothing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk walked into a bar and, after staring for sometime at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I''m sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you worthless, insufferable, wretched, no good drunk!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three monks and a lady arguing about something that the lady was sure she was correct in, but could not convince the monks otherwise. She then prayed to God and asked for a sign. Lightning hit and she said, "Is that enough proof for you?" They replied that lightning strikes all the time and is a natural occurrence. She asked for another sign, and lightning struck a nearby tree; again, they denounced her, saying that it was a natural occurrence. She asked again and a voice rumbled from the sky saying, "SHEEEEE''S RIIIIGHTTTT!" She then thought she had beaten them, when one of them said, "Well, it''s still three to two."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde buys a box of laundry detergent, and it says on the box, "20 uses". A day later, the blonde calls the laundry detergent company and says, "I bought your product and the box says ''20 uses'', but all it does is my laundry!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man excitedly tells his mother he''s fallen in love and is going to get married. He says, "Just for fun, Mom, I''m going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I''m going to marry." The mother agrees. The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, "Okay, Mom. Guess which one I''m going to marry." She immediately replies, "The red-head in the middle." Stunned, the young man says, "That''s amazing, Mom. You''re right. How did you know?" "I don''t like her," she says.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golfer was having a round of golf with the local vicar. The golfer took his birdie put, but then a gust of wind blew the ball just wide of the hole. The golfer, being very bad tempered, then exclaimed "Damn - missed the bugger!". The vicar said to the man "Please do not use foul language again." They moved onto the next hole and exactly the same thing happened - a gust of wind blew the ball just wide. Once again the golfer shouted "Damn - missed the bugger!" This annoyed the vicar, so he turned to the man and said "Please do not use bad language again, or the heavens shall open and God will strike you down with a bolt of lightning!" But once again, on the next hole a gust of wind blew the ball just wide, and the golfer screamed "Damn - missed the bugger!" As soon as he said this the heavens opened and a lightning bolt shot down and struck the vicar. Then God''s voice boomed "Damn - missed the bugger!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tourist to New York City, Bob, was marveling at the Poe opera house. As a man passed by Bob asked "Was this building named for the great author and poet Edgar Allen Poe?" "No," replied the man, "the building was named for James Poe." "What did he write?" asked Bob. Said the man, "A check."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old woman went to visit her daughter and she found her naked, waiting for her husband. The mother asks the daughter, "What are you doing naked?" The daughter responds, "This is the dress of love." When the mother returns home, she strips naked and waits for her husband. When her husband arrives, he asks her, "What are you doing naked?" She responds, "This is the dress of love." "Well," he says to her, "go iron it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bosses were talking about how dumb their blond assistants are. The first boss says, "You think your assistant is dumb, watch this." And the man calls over the blond and says "Go to my house and see if I''m home." So the blond says "Yes sir! Right away sir!" and away she goes. The second boss says "You call that dumb! Watch this!" So he calls over his blonde assistant and says "Here''s a dime, go buy me a car." She replies "Yes sir! No problem!" and away the blond goes. On their way to go do the tasks given to them, they meet up and start talking. The first blond says "My boss is so stupid! He told me to go to his house and see if he''s home. I mean, why couldn''t he just call and see if he''s home! OH! The nerve!" The second blond says "You think that''s dumb? My boss gave me a dime to go buy him a car! Honestly! He didn''t even tell me what kind or color he wanted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Halfway along a commercial flight, a stewardess spoke out to the surprised passengers, "Ladies and gentlemen! We have the honor to announce that you happen to be aboard the 10,001st flight of Good Grace Airlines! To celebrate this historic event, we are glad to give each of you a special valuable gift." The passengers immediately broke into a cheerful applause, congratulating each other on the sudden luck they had. Then one man said aloud, "This is really exciting! But why didn''t you choose the 10,000th flight? I suppose it''s a better number for a celebration." "Certainly we did," replied the stewardess, "but unfortunately, because that flight crashed, we decided to shift the celebration."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid was sitting on his lawn with a litter of puppies one morning. George Bush was on his morning run, accompanied by some Secret Service workers. He kindly asked the boy what kind of puppies they were. The little boy said, "Republicans." The President beamed, patted the boy on the head, and said, "Atta boy!" A few weeks later Bush was jogging again, this time with Dick Cheney in tow. Bush stopped at the boy''s house, winked at Dick and said, "Hi little boy, what kind of puppies are those?" The boy said, "Democrats." Bush was shocked and crushed. "What happened? A few weeks ago they were Republicans!" The boy answered, "Well, then the puppies opened their eyes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A helicopter was flying in Seattle when suddenly an electrical malfunction disabled all electronic navigation and communication equipment. Due to the amount of fog, the pilot could not determine the helicopter''s position. He spotted a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER." The pilot thanked them by smiling and waving, determined the route to SEATAC airport and landed safely. When they were finally on the ground, his co-pilot asked him how he''d done it. "I knew it had to be the Microsoft building, because they gave me a technically correct but utterly and completely useless answer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fill in the blank to this odd analogy. Quiz is to quizzical as test is to _______', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she shows up on radar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ladies and gentlemen, This five-letter-word little thing belongs to men, and no women. Some men have long ones, others shorter. It''s straight in some men, and crooked in others. It may turn soft or hard in just a matter of seconds. Useless to some, it boasts manhood for others. Children wonder about it, young men are proud of it, while old men see their age in it. And whatever it is, some women love it, while others are afraid of it. What is that darn thing anyway? Scroll down for ANSWER - - - - - - - - - - - - - - beard, of course! what else? ;-)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Your richest relative buys an "expensive" house and you have to help take the wheels off of it. 2.You refer to the sixth grade as graduation. 3.Your wife''s new hairdo gets destroyed by the ceiling fan. 4.Your front porch collapses and hurts more than three dogs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man was in bed with his wife when suddenly he let out a loud fart. He yelled, "7 points!" His wife looked at him and said, "What the hell are you doing?" He simply replied, "Just playing bed football." Ten minutes later the wife let a loud one and said, "Tie game - 7,7." The husband''s competitive side kicked in and he started starting straining... when suddenly he crapped his pants! His wife looks over and said, "Now what''s the score?" He said, "Still 7,7. End of quarter; switch sides!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From an interview with a millionaire: "What is your secret to making money?" "Quite simple. Before entering business I observed that most of the sales profits are generally lost in the handling of complaints and refunds. So I made my decision to try to eliminate these expenses." "I can say that''s quite a big task!" "Not for me. I simply started selling parachutes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the similarity between tyrannosaurus and blondes with an IQ greater then 200. A: Both are extinct.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once a blond police officer stopped a man and asked for his driving license. She saw it and told the man "it says here that you must wear glasses" The man said "I have contacts" The blond said "I don''t care who you know, you are still getting a traffic ticket"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W Bush wanted a special postage stamp issued, with his picture on it. He instructed his Postmaster General, stressing that it should be of international quality. When the stamps were released, Bush heard complaints that the stamps were not sticking properly, and he become furious. He called the chief of the Secret Service and ordered him to investigate the matter. The chief checked the matter out at several post offices, and then reported on the problem to Bush. He said, "Sir, the stamp is really of international quality. The problem is, our citizens are spitting on the wrong side!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W. Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar. A guy walks in and asks the barman, "Isn`t that Bush and Powell sitting over there?" The barman says, "Yep, that`s them." So the guy walks over and says, "Wow, this is a real honor. What are you guys doing in here?" Bush says, "We`re planning World War III". And the guy says, "Really? What`s going to happen?" Bush says, "Well, we`re going to kill 140 million Iraqis and one intelligent blonde." The guy exclaimed, "Intelligent blonde! Why kill a blonde?" Bush turns to Powell, punches him on the shoulder and says, "See, smart ass? I told you no one would worry about the 140 million Iraqis!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new business was opening and one of the owner''s friends wanted to send flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card; it said "Rest in Peace". When the friend found out, she became angry and called the florist to complain. After she had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry she was, the florist said. "Madam, I''m really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry you should imagine this: somewhere there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying, "Congratulations on your new location".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that nobody can lick their elbow? *75% of the people that read this try it*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a southern university, students in the psychology program were attending their first class on emotional extremes. "Just to establish some parameters," said the professor to the student from Arkansas, "what is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," said the student. "And the opposite of depression?" he asked of the young lady from Oklahoma. "Elation," she said. "And you sir," he said to the young man from Texas, "what about the opposite of woe?" The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be''giddy up'' ".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three little boys were sitting around talking about their fathers. The first boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings." The second boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings out of his nose." The third boy said, "Well, my dad can blow smoke rings out of his butt." The first and second boys where amazed. The second boy said, "Have you seen him do it?" "No," said the third boy, "but I''ve seen the tobacco stains on his underwear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy eats at a restaurant. At the end of the meal, the guy looks at the check: Salads . . . . . . $3 Steak . . . . . . $10 Works . . . . . . .$5 Cola . . . . . . . $2 ----------------------- Total $20 The customer asked the waiter "What''s ''works''?" "This time it didn''t work" said the waiter and crossed out that row.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny kept spelling the word "went" wrong, instead he spelt "whent". His teacher, who was very fusterated, decided to keep him after class to spell "went" 100 times. The next day she comes into the classroom, thinking he learned his lesson, and sees the whole board is full of the word "went". But at the end... "I wrote "went" 50 times, then I ran out of space, so I whent home"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10 sentences teachers say (and their true meanings) 1. This book is very commonly used (I also studied from it 40 years ago) 2. It''s important to understand what the material means in general (I''m not good with details) 3. Some might say... (My guess is...) 4. The answer to that question is not in the syllabus (I don''t know the answer to your question) 5. We''ll discuss that question next week (I don''t know the answer to your question) 6. I''ll let you search in the dictionary and find out (I don''t know how to spell that word) 7. Some of you could have succeeded more in the test (You all failed) 8. Are there any questions about the material we learned last lesson? (Did any of you review the material as I asked?) 9. Today we''ll split up into small studying groups (I don''t feel like teaching today so keep yourselves busy) 10. The homework is due on Monday (Ruining your weekend is the only fun I have left in teaching)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher, a thief and a lawyer all die in the same freak accident. So when they reach the pearly gates, St. Peter tells them that, unfortunately, heaven is overcrowded, so they each have to answer a question correctly for admission. The teacher is first, and St. Peter asks, "Name the famous ship that was sunk by an iceberg?" "Phew, that one''s easy," says the teacher, "The Titanic." "Alright," said St.Peter, "you may pass." Then the thief got his question: "How many died on the Titanic?" The thief replied, "That''s a toughy, but fortunately I just saw the movie. The answer is 1500 people." And so he passed through. Last, St. Peter gave the lawyer his question: "Name them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond and a brunette were opening their paychecks when the blond asked the brunette what she was going to buy. The brunette replied, "I think I''ll buy a new set of plates because mine are chipped. What are you going to buy?" The blond said, "I think I''m gonna buy a new butt, because my old one has an enormous crack in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this woman who had a blonde daughter. One day, she got her ball stuck in the tree. "Mom, my ball''s stuck in the tree. Can I go get it?" she asked. "No, the perverted boy will look up your skirt and see your underwear. Wait till daddy gets home." The little girl furiously stomped away. About an hour later, before her husband came home, the woman saw her daughter playing with her ball. "How did you get your ball?" "Well, you said that you didn''t want the boy to see my underwear, so I took it off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred and his brother, "Donkey" walk into a pub and Fred gets the first pint in and says, "I''ll have a pint for me and a pint for Donkey." The two guys drink their pints and Fred says, "Right donkey your round; I''ll have a pint of Guiness." Donkey walks up to the bar and says, "2 p p p p pints of g g g g Guiness p p p please." While donkey gets the pints, Fred goes to the toilet and the barman says, "Say, you shouldn''t let him call you that stupid nickname." Donkey replies, "I know. He aw.. he aww... he awwwwww, he always calls me ''Donkey.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Chinese couple got married and were now known as Mr. Wong and Mrs. Wong. However, they didn''t know why, but they couldn''t have white children. So they went to the doctor to find out what the problem was, and they told him the story and the doctor replied, "Didn''t you know?" "Two Wongs don''t make a white!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cinderella, Superman and Pinocchio die and go to heaven. On their way they talk: Cinderella: "I want to be remembered as the most beautiful girl in the world." Superman: "I want to be remembered as the strongest person in the world." Pinocchio: "I want to be remembered as the greatest liar in the world." It''s Cinderella''s turn. She goes into the room and comes out smiling, saying, "It''s done. I''m the most beautiful girl in the world!" Then goes Superman. He goes into the room and comes out happy, saying, "It''s done. I''m the strongest person in the world!" Last comes out Pinocchio, angrily he says: "Damn! who''s this Clinton guy?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb??? None, they will just have there robot do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Bob (a boy) went to Sally (a beautiful girl). Bob told her, "Sal, Jack (a boy) wants you." She replied, "I know." They stand in silence for a while. Bob finally said, "I mean he needs your help." "Oh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girls are in the shower for at least an hour. Incredibly guys can take a shower in 5 minutes. Very beautiful girls are seldom intelligent. Even blond guys have some brains. Married women marry hoping their guy will change. Every man marries hoping their wife wont change. Pretty girls can usually get what they want. Unlike good looking guys who still have to suffer. Some girls are actually great relationship material. Some guys cant find those girls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are talking over a beer, discussing various sex positions. The first guy says, "My favorite position is the ''rodeo'' position." "What is the ''rodeo'' position, and how do you do that?" asks the second man. The first guy explains, "Well, first you tell your wife to get on the bed on all fours, and then you do it doggy- style. Once things start to get underway, and she''s really into it, you lean forward and whisper in her ear, ''Your sister likes this position too...'' Then, try to hang on for 8 seconds."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, whenever someone says that you''re nobody, remember nobody''s perfect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What haunts the closets of a haunted house? The SOULS of shoes! What''s a ghosts favourite dessert? I-scream! What was the ghosts favorite baseball team? The BOO Jays! What room is a ghost not allowed to go inside? The Living room Why didn''t the vampire have fun on his vacation? He SUCKED all the fun out of it! If a snow man and a vampire got married and they had a baby what would the baby be? A Snowvam! Where do monsters love to visit in New York? The Vampire State Building. Why did the vampire''s friend break up with him? Because he was a pain in the neck! Why do witches use brooms to fly on? Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy! What kind of street do zombies like best? Dead ends! What is a vampire''s favourite mode of transportation? A blood vessel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the mother match say to the baby match? Don''t scratch your head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a person who says that they are going to tell on you? You say: Too late, I already told.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a cat comes walking by meowing, "I can''t do anything right." So he keeps on pouting and somebody comes up to him and says, "Why are you crying?" "Because I can''t do anything right." So the guy helps the cat and a day later the cat could do anything right so he goes to the litter box and misses the box by an inch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the teenager cross the road? Because his parents told him not to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is a man''s idea of helping you with the housework? A: Lifting up his legs so you can vacuum underneath them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little johnny was going to school. Incredibly he found a genie and was given 3 wishes. "Can I have a piece of candy?" he said. "Kid, I am a powerful genie ask for something else." "Mmmm, ok, give me 2 pieces of candy." "You think I have time for such small wishes? Don''t ask for something so small." "I want candy." "Ok kid here you go; infinite candy." "Cool, thank you." "Ok whats your second wish? Kid, i don''t have all day." "But I still have 3 wishes.."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pet store and asks for a German shepperd. The shopkeeper, replies that it will cost him $500. The man thinks for a minute, then asks how much a beware of dog sign costs. The shopkeeper calmly replies that it costs a whopping $1.98. The man thinks for a while longer, and asks for a beware of dog sign.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the government have but never uses to make life simple? Their power!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was at a bar about to drink his drink. Then, a tough looking biker came and just drank the first man''s drink. The first man said "Why did you do that? I have been having a horrible day. First, I wake up, am late for work, and get fired. Then, I come home to find my wife cheating, I get kicked out of the house, and I get beat up by a bunch of thugs. Finally, I was about to end it all by drinking that cup of poison that you drank!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Name:_________ 1. Finish this pattern: a,_,c,d,e,f (hint, B) 2. If you are standing, what are you doing? (hint, standing) 3. Finish the sentence: I am a blond______ 4. Explain Einstein''s theory, or spell cat 5. Are you writing with a pen/pencil or a tissue? (hint pen/pencil) 6. Spell the word chicken', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that every time she turned around it was her birthday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. It is the new hip thing to rot your teeth. 2. They are highly non-nutritous. 3. In case of weak teeth, just bite into the hard candy. 4. For absolutely no good reason. 5. Makes you sick so that you do not have to go to school. 6. To get hyperactive so that you are not sleepy when you get out of bed. 7. Because the candy is saying, "Eat me!!!" 8. Because your tummy is growling and you think it is annoying. 9. In case you got an urge to suck on something. 10. Because the noises that the candy makes when it bangs against your teeth makes a relaxing sound for the mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving down the road when he spots 2 priests on the side nailing signs into the ground. The first sign says, "The End is Near!!" The man turns to look at the other mans sign and it reads, "Turn back while you still can!" The man then sticks his head out his car window and yells, "Leave everyone alone, you religious nutcases!" as he drives by. A few seconds later the two priests hear a splash. The first priest turns to the second and says, "Maybe we should just put up a ''Bridge Out'' sign."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are so ugly your mum has to feed you with a slingshot', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which came first - the chicken or the egg? It depends on who got laid first!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eight year old Sally brought her report card home from school. Her marks were good, mostly A''s and a couple of B''s. However, her teacher had written across the bottom: "Sally is a smart little girl, but she has one fault. She talks too much in school. I have an idea I am going to try, which I think may break her of the habit." Sally''s dad signed her report card, putting a note on the back: "Please let me know if your idea works on Sally because I would like to try it out on her mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elevator operator complained that he was getting tired of people asking him for the time. A friend suggested that he hang a clock in his elevator. A few weeks later, the friend inquired as to how things were going. "Just awful!" declared the elevator operator. "NOW, all day long, people ask me, "Is the clock right?" exclaimed the elevator operator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re getting old when... your sweetie says, "Let''s go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Honey, I can''t do both!" your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you''re barefoot. a sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door. you don''t care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don''t have to go along. you are cautioned to slow down by the doctor, instead of the police. "Getting a little action" means, "I don''t need to take any fiber today." "getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot. an "all nighter" means not getting up to pee!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the store manager returned from lunch, he noticed his clerk''s hand was bandaged, but before he could ask about the bandage, the clerk had some very good news for him. "Guess what, sir?" the clerk said. "I finally sold that terrible, ugly suit we''ve had so long!" "Do you mean that repulsive pink-and-blue double-breasted thing?!" the manager asked. "That''s the one!" "That''s great!" the manager cried, "I thought we''d never get rid of that monstrosity! That had to be the ugliest suit we''ve ever had! But tell me, why is your hand bandaged?" "Oh," the clerk replied, "after I sold the guy that suit, his seeing-eye dog bit me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Albert Einstein arrives at a party and introduces himself to the first person he sees and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers "241." "That is wonderful!," says Albert. "We will talk about the Grand Unification Theory and the mysteries of the Universe. We will have much to discuss!" Next Albert introduces himself to a woman and asks, "What is your IQ?" To which the lady answers, "144." "That is great!," responds Albert. "We can discuss politics and current affairs. We will have much to discuss!" Albert goes to another person and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers, "51." Albert responds, "How ''bout them Cowboys?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a young hooker named Gail whose price was tattooed on her tail. And on her behind, for the sake of the blind, was the same information in Braille.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a torrential rain soaked South Louisiana; the next morning the resulting floodwaters came up about 6 feet into most of the homes. Mrs. Boudreaux was sitting on her roof with her neighbor, Mrs. Wilson, waiting for help to come. Mrs. Wilson noticed a lone baseball cap floating near the house. Then she saw it float far out into the front yard, then float all the way back to the house; it kept floating away from the house, then back in again, over and over. Her curiosity got the best of her, so she asked Mrs. Boudreaux, "Do you see that baseball cap floating away from the house, then back again?" Mrs. Boudreaux said, "Oh yes, that''s my husband; I told him he was going to cut the grass today come Hell or high water!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many ears did Davy Crockett have? 3 - His right ear, his left ear, and his wild front-ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton and Al Gore went into a local diner for lunch. As they read the menu, the waitress came over and asked Clinton, "Are you ready to order, sir?" Clinton replies, "Yes, I''d like a quickie." "A quickie?!" the waitress replies with disgust. "Sir, given the current situation of your personal life, I don''t believe that''s a good idea. I''ll come back later when you are ready to make an order from the MENU." She walks away. Al Gore leans over to Clinton and says, "Sir, it''s pronounced ''Quiche''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THINGY: female: Any part under a car''s hood. male: The strap fastener on a woman''s bra VULNERABLE: female: Fully opening up one''s self emotionally to another. male: Playing football without a helmet. COMMUNICATION: female: The sharing of thoughts and feelings with one''s partner. male: Leaving a note before suddenly taking off for the weekend with the boys. BUTT: female: The body part that "looks bigger" no matter what is worn. male: What you slap when someone scores a touchdown, home run, or goal. Also good for mooning. COMMITMENT: female: A desire to get married and raise a family. male: Trying not to pick up other women while out with the girlfriend. ENTERTAINMENT: female: A good movie, concert, play or book. male: Anything that can be done while drinking. FLATULENCE: female: An embarrassing by-product of digestion. male: An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and essential element of male bonding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve all heard of TGIF - Thank God It''s Friday, right? Well my Secretary refers to Friday as POETS day... Piss Off Early, Tomorrow''s Saturday....!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gary: I don''t think I deserve a zero on this test. Teacher: I agree, but it''s the lowest mark I can give you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hygiene Teacher: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects? Jose: Don''t bite any.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a short story to show you that the stodgy air traffic controllers and the flyers they serve can have a sense of humor: The controller who was working a busy pattern told the 727 on downwind to make a three-sixty (to do a complete circle, usually to provide spacing between aircraft). The pilot of the 727 complained, "Do you know it costs us two thousand dollars to make a three-sixty in this airplane? Without missing a beat the controller replied, "Roger, give me four thousand dollars worth!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First guy (proudly): "My wife''s an angel!" Second guy: "You''re lucky, mine''s still alive."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Alfred, how can one person make so many mistakes in one day? Alfred: I get up early.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill & Hillary Clinton were sleeping at the White House. Hillary wakes up and starts shaking Bill to wake him up. "Bill, Bill wake up." Bill continues sleeping. Hillary shouts, "Bill, Bill wake up." Bill finally wakes up and says, "What do you want?" Hillary responds, "I have to go use the bathroom." Bill says, "Please tell me you didn''t wake me up just to tell me you have to go to the bathroom." Hillary says, "No, I just wanted to tell you to save my spot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Soup manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America''s shelves this week with "Clinton Soup," that will honor one of the nation''s most distinguished men. It consists primarily of a small weenie in hot water. Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill Clinton. The Dodge Drafter will begin production in Canada this year. When Clinton was asked what he thought about foreign affairs, he replied: "I don''t know, I never had one." American Indians have nicknamed Bill Clinton as "Walking Eagle" because he is so full of crap he can''t fly. Clinton only lacks three things to become one of America''s finest leaders: Integrity, vision, and wisdom. Clinton is doing the work of three men: Larry, Curly, and Moe. Revised judicial oath: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth as I know it, the whole truth as I believe it to be, and nothing but what I think you need to know."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman decided to have her portrait painted. She said to the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets, a ruby brooch and Rolex watch." "But you aren''t wearing any of those things," said the artist. "I know," she said. "It''s in case I should die before my husband. I''m sure he will remarry right away, and I want his new wife to go crazy looking for the jewelry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don''t get mad at me.....I know we''ve been friends for a long time, but I just can''t think of your name! I''ve thought and thought, but I can''t remember it. Please tell me what your name is." Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly women were eating at a restaurant one morning. Ethel noticed something funny about Mabel''s ear and she said, "Mabel, did you know you''ve got a suppository in your left ear?" Mabel answered, "I have? A suppository?" She pulled it out and stared at it. Then she said, "Ethel, I''m glad you saw this thing. Now I think I know where my hearing aid is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While making rounds, a doctor points out an X-ray to a group of first year medical students. "As you can see," she says, "the patient limps because his left fibula and tibia are radically arched. Michael, what would you do in a case like this?" "Well," ponders the student, "I suppose I''d limp too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we didn''t have ten years ago. Willy: Me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures, tacked to a bulletin board, of the 10 most wanted men. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. "Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want him very badly." So Little Johnny asked, "Then why didn''t you keep him when you took his picture?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde girl was at school staring at a puzzle on her desk that she could not figure out. The teacher comes by and tells her, "You can solve it! Just use your head!" The teacher comes back to check on the blonde and she saw her head all bruised up. The teacher said, "What happened?!" Then the blonde says, "Well, you told me to use my head."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Zack and his mule were walking down the road when one of Zack''s friends drove up and offered him a ride to town. Zack got into the truck while his mule ran along behind. The mule was right in back of them as they reached 55, and stayed with them as they sped up to 70. "I''m worried about your mule," said the driver, "his tongue''s hanging out." "Which way?" asked Zack. "Left," his friend said. "Well, stay in this lane - he''s about to pass." shouted Zack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a bi-partisan move, President Bush has nominated Dr. Hannibal Lecter as his candidate for US Surgeon General. "I think Dr. Lecter will serve with pride, fava beans, and a nice Chianti," Bush announced. In another announcement, Special Agent Clarice Starling will become the new FBI director. She''s expected to work closely with the new Surgeon General on a case concerning missing former Vice President Al Gore. President Bush had recently arranged a meeting between Gore and Lecter. Lecter was the last person to see Gore before Gore''s sudden disappearance in early January. Lecter noted that he, "enjoyed having Gore for dinner," but was upset at how Gore, or, rather the *subject* of Gore kept "coming up." "I''m sick to my stomach over this," Lecter said. President Bush didn''t seem concerned with the disappearance of his rival for the office. "I think it''s all crap by now, don''t you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Next time you start to groan at friend''s pun, ask yourself: Am I just being jealous?: "A pun is the lowest form of humor -- when you don''t think of it first." --Oscar Levant "Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted." --Fred Allen "A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents." --G. C. Lichtenberg', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on. The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded." The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order." The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers...those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would." But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed: "You''re all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There''s no guts, no heart, and no spine, and the head and butt are interchangeable."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just think, if it weren''t for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winners of a New York Magazine contest who were asked to take a well-known expression in a foreign language, change a single letter and provide a definition for the new expression RESPONDEZ S''IL VOUS PLAID: Honk if you''re Scottish HARLEZ-VOUS FRANCAIS?: Can you drive a French motorcycle? VENI, VIPI, VICI: I came, I''m a very important person, I conquered. COGITO EGGO SUM: I think; therefore I am a waffle. RIGOR MORRIS: The cat is dead. QUE SERA SERF: Life is feudal. LE ROI EST MORT. JIVE LE ROI: The king is dead. No kidding. POSH MORTEM: Death styles of the rich and famous. PRO BOZO PUBLICO: Support your local clown. MONAGE A TROIS: I am three years old. HASTE CUISINE: Fast French food. QUIP PRO QUO: A fast retort. ALOHA OY: Love; greetings; farewell; from such a pain you should never know. MAZEL TON: Tons of luck. VISA LA FRANCE: Don''t leave your chateau without it. CARNE DIEM: Seize the meat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He''s lying" was placed in the copier, and the police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn''t telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was recently hired at an office. Her first task was to go out for coffee. Eager to do well her first day on the job, she grabbed a large thermos and hurried to a nearby coffee shop. She held up the thermos and the coffee shop worker quickly came over to take her order. "Is this big enough to hold six cups of coffee?" the blonde asked. The coffee shop worker looked at the thermos, hesitated a few seconds, then finally replied, "Yeah. It looks like about six cups to me." "Oh good!" the blonde sighed in relief. "Then give me two regular, two black, and two decaf."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man inserted an ''ad'' in the classified: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LEARNING CHINESE That''s not right: Sum Ting Wong Are you harboring a fugitive?: Hu Yu Hai Ding? See me ASAP: Kum Hia Nao Stupid Man: Dum Gai Small Horse: Tai Ni Po Ni Did you go to the beach?: Wai Yu So Tan? I bumped into a coffee table: Ai Bang Mai Ni I think you need a face lift: Chin Tu Fat It''s very dark in here: Wai So Dim? I thought you were on a diet: Mun Ching? This is a tow away zone: No Pah King You are not very bright: Yu So Dum I got this for free: Ai No Pei Please stay a while longer: Wai Go Nao? Stay out of sight: Lei Lo He''s cleaning his automobile: Wa Shing Ka Your body odor is offensive: Yu Stin Ki Pu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly his boat was attacked by the Loch Ness monster. In one easy flip, the beast tossed him and his boat high into the air; then it opened its mouth to swallow both. As the man sailed head over heels, he cried out, "Oh, my God! Help me!" At once, the ferocious attack scene froze in place, and as the atheist hung in mid-air, a booming voice came down from the clouds, "I thought you didn''t believe in Me!" "Come on God, give me a break!!" the man pleaded. "two minutes ago I didn''t believe in the Loch Ness monster either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest and a rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train. After a while, the priest put down his book and opened a conversation by saying, "I know that, in your religion, you''re not supposed to eat pork... but have you really never even tasted it?" The rabbi closed his newspaper and responded, "I must tell you the truth. Yes I have, on the odd occasion." The rabbi had his turn of interrogation. He asked, "I know that in your religion, you''re supposed to be celibate... but..." The priest interjected, "Yes, I know what you are going to ask, and yes, I have succumbed to temptation once or twice." The two resumed their reading. There was silence for a while. Then the rabbi peeked around his newspaper with a smile and said, "Better than pork, isn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: "Doctor, you gotta help me. I''m under a lot of stress. I keep losing my temper with people." Doctor: "Tell me about your problem." Patient: "I just did, you moron!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a woman says: This place is a mess! C''mon! You and I need to clean up! Your stuff is lying on the floor and you''ll have no clothes to wear if we don''t do laundry right now! What a man hears: blah,blah,blah,blah, C''MON, blah,blah,blah,blah, YOU AND I blah, blah,blah,blah, ON THE FLOOR blah,blah,blah,blah, NO CLOTHES blah,blah,blah,blah, RIGHT NOW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In pharmacology, all drugs have generic names: Tylenol is acetaminophen, Advil is ibuprofen, & so on. The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra and announced today that they have settled on mycoxafailin. Also considered were mycoxafloppin, mydixadrupin and mydixarizin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister decided to do something a little different one Sunday morning. He said "Today, church members, I am going to say a single word and you are going to help me preach. Whatever single word I say, I want you to sing whatever hymn that comes to your mind." The pastor shouted out, "Cross." Immediately the congregation started singing in unison, "The Old Rugged Cross." The Pastor hollered out "Grace." The congregation began to sing, "Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound..." The Pastor said, "Power." The congregation sang, "There is Power in the Blood." The Pastor said, "Sex." The congregation fell in total silence; everyone was in shock. They all nervously began to look around at each other, afraid to say anything. Then, way in the back of the church, a little old grandmother stood up and began to sing, ........."Precious Memories".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven? I asked the children in my Sunday school class. "NO!" the children all answered. "If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?" Again, the answer was, "NO!" "Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my wife, would that get me into Heaven?" Again, they all answered, "NO!" "Well," I continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?" A five-year-old boy shouted out, "YOU GOTTA BE DEAD!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stupid Things Said In The World Of Soccer: 1. Well, it''s Liverpool two, Ipswich nil, and if the score stays this way, I''ve got to fancy Liverpool for the win. 2. He had an eternity to play that ball, but took too long. 3. And so they have not been able to improve on their 100% record. 4. With the last kick of the game, he scored with a header. 5. Well, it''s a fabulous kaleidescope of colour: almost all the Brazilians are wearing yellow shirts. 6. If that had gone on, it would definitely have been a goal. 7. Their manager, Howard Wilkinson, isn''t here today, which strongly suggests that he may be elsewhere. 8. I am a firm believer that if one team scores a goal, the other needs to score two to win. 9. If a team scores early on, it often takes an early lead. 10. You cannot possibly have counted the number of passes made, but there were eight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the entire world was a stage and God was the director, what we need is a rehearsal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CNN gets news that 100 blonds are killed in a train accident at Marylebone station. Only one blond left alive. The correspondent goes to her and asks, "Miss, how did it happen?" Blond: "Oh don''t ask about it. All were right as long as all were waiting on the platform for the train. Then came the announcement that ''The bakerloo line will arrive on platform number 2'' so when everyone heard that the train is coming on the platform, everyone ran to the rails to save their lives, and the train arrived on the rails!!!" Correspondent: "Thank god you thought well and didn''t go to the rails" Blond: "Oh no, I was on the rails for committing suicide and after the announcement I came to the platform!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A visitor from Pakistan was strolling in a park in New Delhi, India, enjoying the greenery and flowers. He needed to empty his bladder badly, but couldn''t find a urinal anywhere. He couldn''t hold out any longer, and went behind a large bush. Just as he was undoing his fly buttons a policeman caught him. "What do you think you are doing?" asked the constable. "I want to pee," replied the visitor. "I am from Pakistan and I don''t know where to go. Please help me out." The constable ordered, "OK, follow me. I''ll show you a place with more greenery, flowers and bushes than this park. You can pee there as much as you like." He took the Pakistani to a greener and more beautiful garden where he emptied his bladder. The Pakistani emptied his bladder, thanked the policeman and asked "Whose garden is this, it is so beautiful?" The constable replied, "This is the garden of the Pakistani High Commission."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman awoke excitedly on Valentine''s Day and announced enthusiastically to her husband, "I just dreamt that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine''s Day! What do you think it means?" With certainty in his voice, the man said, "You''ll know tonight." That evening, the man came home with a small package and handed it to his wife. With anxious anticipation the woman quickly opened the package to find a book entitled, "The Meaning of Dreams."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are married women heavier than single women? Single women come home, see what''s in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what''s in bed and go to the fridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy asked his mother, "Can I go over to Little Johnny''s house and watch the magic show?" Billy''s mother replied, "Whatever do you mean, dear?" He answered, "The one Johnny''s mom performs. I heard her tell Miss Figpot that she got $600 for doing six tricks last night. That must be some kind of show!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bounty - The Quicker Picker-Upper Chevy Truck - Like A Rock Energizer - It Keepsa Going And Going KFC - Finger Lickin'' Good McDonals - We Love To See You Smile M&M''s - It Melts In Your Mouth, Not In Your Hands Nike - Just Do It Pringles - Once You Pop, You Can''t Stop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was giving confession, and he told the priest that he was having impure thoughts about his sister. "Is this a sin, Father?" he asked. The priest nodded and said, "Yes, Little Johnny, indeed, it is a sin. Look at the two beautiful brothers you have."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that Hollywood is going to remake The Exorcist? The new movie is about a mother who hires the Devil to get a priest out of her son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I see a monk''s ass I just grab it. Said the lazily amorous abbot. "Although it''s more fun, To have sex with a nun, It''s so hard to get into the habit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the church service one Sunday, a parishioner was speaking about an emotionally charged topic and had trouble controlling her tears. Finishing her remarks, she told the congregation, "I apologize for crying so much. I''m usually not such a big boob." The bishop rose to close the session and remarked, "That''s okay. We like big boobs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is black and white and green and black and white? A: Two nuns fighting over a sweaty pickle. Q: What is black and white and grinds up and down, up and down? A: A nun churning butter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is black and white and gooey and creamy? A: A nun eating a bowl of Tapioca pudding. Q: What is black and white and makes a wet, sucking sound? A: A toothless, elderly nun eating a Communion wafer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If two black cats walk by each other, then do they both get bad luck? Does the more disgusting foods mean that they are healthier? When you get your first pair of scissors you need a pair of scissors to open the pair of scissors that you just got. So how are you going to get it open?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid-December. Female reindeer retain their antlers till after they give birth in the spring. Therefore, according to every historical rendition depicting Santa''s reindeer, every single one of them, from Rudolph to Blitzen- had to be a girl. We should''ve known. Only women, while pregnant, would be able to drag a fat man in a red velvet suit all around the world in one night and not get lost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9. Why it''s good to have five pairs of black shoes. 8. The difference between cream, ivory, and off-white. 7. Crying can be fun. 6. Fat clothes. 5. A salad, diet drink, and a hot fudge sundae make a balanced lunch. 4. Discovering a designer dress on the clearance rack can be considered a peak life experience. 3. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made. 2. A good man might be hard to find, but a good hairdresser is next to impossible. And the number one thing only women understand... 1. Other women!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day. The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the saloon as the Cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail a few feet in front of the sheriff. "Howdy, stranger..." "Howdy, Sheriff..." The cowboy then moved slowly to the back of his horse, lifted its tail, and placed a big kiss were the sun don''t shine. He dropped the horse''s tail, stepped up on the walk, and aimed toward the swinging doors of the saloon. "Hold on, Mister..." "Sheriff?" "Did I just see what I think I just saw?" "Reckon you did, Sheriff...I got me some powerful chapped lips..." "And that cures them?" "Nope, but it sure keeps me from lickin'' em.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Carol was having trouble with her computer. So she called Glenn, the computer guy, over to her desk. Glenn clicked a couple buttons and solved the problem. As he was walking away, Carol called after him, "So, what was wrong?" And he replied, "It was an ID Ten T Error." A puzzled expression ran riot over Carol''s face. "An ID Ten T Error? What''s that ... in case I need to fix it again??" He gave her a grin... "Haven''t you ever heard of an ID Ten T Error before?" "No," replied Carol. "Write it down," he said, "and I think you''ll figure it out." (She wrote...) I D 1 0 T', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy goes into a restaurant for a Christmas breakfast while in his home town for the holidays. After looking over the menu he says, "I''ll just have the eggs Benedict." His order comes a while later and it''s served on a big, shiny hubcap. He asks the waiter, "What''s with the hubcap?" The waiter sings, "Oh, there''s no plate like chrome for the hollandaise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor made it his regular habit to stop off at a bar for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home. The bartender knew of his habit, and would always have the drink waiting at precisely 5:03 p.m. One afternoon, as the end of the work day approached, the bartender was dismayed to find that he was out of hazelnut extract. Thinking quickly, he threw together a daiquiri made with hickory nuts and set it on the bar. The doctor came in at his regular time, took one sip of the drink and exclaimed, "This isn''t a hazelnut daiquiri!" "No, I''m sorry," replied the bartender, "it''s a hickory daiquiri, Doc."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest, and writers cramp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The newspaper obituary operator received a phone call. The woman on the other end asked, "How much do funeral notices cost?" "Five dollars per word, ma''am," came the response. "Good, do you have a paper and pencil handy?" "Yes, ma''am." "Okay, write this: ''Cohen died.'' " "I''m sorry, ma''am, I forgot to tell you there''s a five-word minimum." "Hmmph," came the reply. "You certainly did forget to tell me that." After a moment of silence, the woman continued, "Got your pencil and paper?" "Yes, ma''am." "Okay, print this: ''Cohen died. Cadillac for sale.'' "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. She wants her own intern. 9. She wants to complete her china and silver collection. 8. Brother-in-law Roger needs another pardon. 7. She wants to lease the Lincoln Bedroom to Marc Rich. 6. She wants to rename Camp David to Camp Denise. 5. She wants to pick up the rest of the furniture. 4. She wants to return to public housing. 3. She wants the top floor of the Trump Tower when she leaves. 2. She misses her hairdresser. 1. Bill needs a pardon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t blondes put in lightbubs? Because they keep breaking them with hammers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fellow was talking to his buddy, and he said, "I don''t know what to get my wife for her birthday. She has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I''m stumped." His buddy said, "I have an idea. Why don''t you make up a certificate saying she can have 60 minutes of great sex, any way that she wants it. She''ll probably be thrilled." So the fellow did. The next day his buddy asked, "Well? Did you take my suggestion?" "Yes, I did," said the fellow. "...And did she like it?" His buddy asked. "Oh yes! She jumped up, thanked me, kissed me on the forehead and ran out the door yelling, ''I''ll be back in an hour!'' She should be back any time now..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t women blink during foreplay? They don''t have time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A widow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('AT LAST SOMEONE SUMMED IT UP... The nice men are ugly. The handsome men are not nice. The handsome and nice men are gay. The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married. The men who are not so handsome but are nice men have no money. The men which are not so handsome but are nice men with money think we are only after their money. The handsome men without money are after our money. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don''t think we are beautiful enough. The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money are cowards. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and are heterosexual are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!! The men who never make the first move, automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative. NOW... WHO UNDERSTANDS MEN?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy was staggering home with a pint of booze in his back pocket when he slipped and fell heavily. Struggling to his feet, he felt something wet running down his leg. "Please Lord," he implored, "let it be blood!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If love is blind is then why is lingerie so popular?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 100 lawyers jumping out of an airplane? Skeet', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('McQuillan walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olive and placing it in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the Irishman started to leave. "S''cuse me," said a customer, who was puzzled over what McQuillan had done, "what was that all about?" "Nothin''," said the Irishman. "My wife just sent me out for a jar of olives!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest''s breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?" "Just water," says the priest. The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?" The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He''s done it again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man told his doctor that he just wasn''t able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English... What''s wrong with me?" "Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you''re simply a lazy old fart." "Thank you for your candor," said the man. "Now give me the medical term, so I have something to tell my wife!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don''t know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we''ve been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. "I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, I get undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and yells at me for staying out so late!" His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you''re obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, slap her on the butt and say, ''You as horny as I am?'' She always acts like she''s sound asleep!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the Knight-Rider News Service, the inscription on the metal bands used by the U.S. Department of the Interior to tag migratory birds has been changed. The bands used to bear the address of the Washington Biological Survey, abbreviated: "Wash. Biol. Surv." until the agency received the following letter from an Arkansas camper: "Dear Sirs: While camping last week I shot one of your birds. I think it was a crow. I followed the cooking instructions on the leg tag and I want to tell you it was horrible." The bands are now marked Fish and Wildlife Service.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a teenage girl smiles at a boy, he tries to decide what makes him so sexy. When a young lady smiles at a man in his fifties, he turns around to see who''s the handsome dude behind him. But when a female of any age smiles at a man of 80, he looks down to see if he''s unzipped', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him. He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, a pessimist by nature, and invited him to hunt with him and his new dog. As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. The friend saw everything but did not say a single word. On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, "Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?" "I sure did," responded his friend. "He can''t swim."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Indians asked their Chief in autumn, "Chief, is this coming winter going to be mild or cold?" Not really knowing an answer, and knowing it was better to err on the side of caution, the chief replied, "It is uncertain at this time, but we should begin to prepare just in case. Collect wood as if it is going to be cold, and I''ll see what more I can learn." Being a good leader, he then went to the phone and called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is this winter going to be mild or cold?" The man on the phone responded, "This winter was going to be quite cold indeed." So the Chief went back to speed up his people to collect even more wood to be prepared. A week later, he again called the National Weather Service again, "Is it going to be a cold winter?" "Yes," the man replied, "it''s going to be an extremely cold winter. The Indians are collecting all the wood they can find!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father knelt with his son to hear his prayers. The three-year-old boy began in all seriousness: "Our Father who Art in Heaven, how do You know my name?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And another four-year-old prayed: "And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pilot: "Pilot to tower. I am 300 miles from land. 600 feet over water and running out of fuel. Please instruct!" Tower: "Tower to pilot. Tower to pilot. Repeat after me, ''Our Father, who art in heaven...''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes into the store and asks the clerk, "I''d like some Polish sausage." The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?" The guy, clearly offended, says, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you: if I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German sausage, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican? Huh? Would ya??" The clerk says "Well, no..." With deep self righteous indignation, the guy says, "Well, alright then, why the HELL did you ask me if I''m Polish just because I ask for Polish sausage?" The clerk says "Because this is a hardware store."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are some winners: Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the reader who doesn''t get it. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very high. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of obtaining sex. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. Karmageddon: It''s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it''s, like, a serious bummer. Glibido: All talk and no action. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl asked her father, "Daddy? Do all fairy tales begin with ''Once Upon A Time''?" He replied, "No, there is a whole series of fairy tales that begin with ''If elected, I promise''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man joined the priesthood. The order he joined could not speak for seven years; and then they could only say two words. The first seven years passed and they went into a small room. His two words were "too cold". The next seven years passed and they took him back into the small room and his two words were "bad food". The next seven years passed they took him back into the small room and his two words were "I quit". "Good," they said, "all you have done is complain."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a northern fairy tale and a southern fairy tale? A northern fairy tale begins with, "Once upon a time..." A southern fairy tale begins, "''Y''all ain''t gonna believe this..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This blonde was driving down an old country road when she spots another blonde in a wheat field rowing a boat. She pulls over to the side of the road and stops the car. Staring in disbelief she stands at the side of the road to watch the woman for a while. When she could not stand it any more she called out to the blonde in the field. "Why are you rowing a boat in the middle of the field?" The blonde in the field stops rowing and responds, "Because it is an ocean of wheat." The blonde standing on the side of the road is furious. She yells at the blonde in the field. "It is dumb blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name." The blonde in the field just shrugged her shoulders and began rowing again. The blonde on the side of the road was beside herself and shook her fist at blonde in the field yelling, "If I could swim, I would come out there and kick your tail!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- When Cupid shoots his arrow, I hope he Mrs. you. -If I were a head of lettuce, I''d cut myself in two. I''d give a leaf to everyone, but save the heart for you. -Can''t write, too dumb; inspiration won''t come. Bad ink, no pen; that''s all, amen. -My love fo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are men and parking spots alike? Good ones are always taken. Free ones are mostly handicapped or extremely short.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TOP 10 SLOGANS BEING CONSIDERED BY VIAGRA 10. Viagra, It''s "Whaazzzzz Up!" 9. Viagra, The quicker pecker upper 8. Viagra, Like a rock! 7. Viagra, When it absolutely, positively has to be there tonight. 6. Viagra, Be all that you can be. 5. Viagra, Reach out and touch someone. 4. Viagra, Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman! 3. Viagra, Tastes great!......... More filling! 2. Viagra, We bring good things to life! And the number one slogan, being considered by Viagra: 1. This is your penis.........This is your penis on drugs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The angry preacher... The preacher rose with a red face. "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the K.K.K. This is a horrible lie, and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family!" No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you not have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood. Remember, you will be forgiven and in our heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression!" Again all was quiet. Slowly a drop dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would not stop rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke. "Reverend, there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I told a couple of friends you were a wizard under the sheets."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Tearful Bride... A new young blonde bride calls her mother in tears. She sobs, "Robert doesn''t appreciate what I do for him." "Now, now," her mother comforted, "I am sure it was all just a misunderstanding." "No, mother," you don''t understand. "I bought a frozen turkey roll and he yelled and screamed at me about the price!" "Well, the nerve of that lousy cheapskate!" says her mom. "Those turkey rolls are only a few dollars." "No, mother it wasn''t the price of the turkey, it was the airplane ticket." "Airplane ticket.... What did you need an airplane ticket for?" "Well mother, when I went to fix it, I looked at the directions on the package and it said - ''Prepare from a frozen state,'' so I flew to Alaska!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The phone call... A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The wife (a blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, "How should I know, that''s 200 miles from here!" and hung up. Curious, the husband said, "Who was that?" And his lovely wife replies, "I don''t have any idea who it was. It was some stupid woman wanting to know "if the coast is clear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde came home from her first day commuting into the city. Her mother noticed she was looking a little peaked and asked, "Honey, are you feeling all right?" "Not really," the blonde replied. "I''m nauseous from sitting backward on the train." "Poor dear," Mom said. "Why didn''t you ask the person sitting across from you to switch seats for a while?" "I couldn''t," she replied, "there was no one there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An overweight blonde consulted her doctor for advice. The doctor advised that she run 10 miles a day for 30 days. This, he promised, would help her lose as much as twenty pounds. The blonde follows the doctor''s advice, and, after thirty days, she was pleased to find that she''d indeed lost twenty pounds. She phoned the doctor and thanked him for the wonderful advice which produced such effective results. At the end of the conversation, however, she asked one last question: "How do I get home, since I am now 300 miles away?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was visiting Washington, DC for the first time. She wanted to see the Capitol building. Unfortunately, she couldn''t find it, so she asked a police officer for directions - "Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Capitol building?" The officer replied, "Wait here at this bus stop for the number 54 bus. It''ll take you right there." She thanked the officer and he drives off. Three hours later the police officer returned to the same area and, sure enough, the blonde is still waiting at the same bus stop. The officer got out of his car and said, "Excuse me, but to get to the Capitol building, I said to wait here for the number 54 bus and that was three hours ago! Why are you still waiting?" The blonde replied, "Don''t worry, officer, it won''t be long now... The 45th bus just went by!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a blonde gathering, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease. "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "That''s easy," he replied. "You ask them a simple question which everyone should be able to answer with no trouble. If they hesitate, that puts you on the right track." "What sort of question would you ask Doctor?" "Well, you might ask them..." "Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?" The blonde thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh - "You wouldn''t happen to have another example would you?" "I must confess I don''t know much about history."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are waiting at a bus stop. When a bus pulls up and opens the door, one of the blondes leans inside and asks the bus driver: "Will this bus take me to 5th Avenue?" The bus driver shakes his head and says, "No, I''m sorry." Hearing this, the other blonde leans inside, smiles, and twitters: "Will it take ME?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following sign was posted at a fast food restaurant owned by two blondes: "Parking for drive-through customers only!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde kept having the same weird dream everyday, so she went to her doctor. Doctor: What was your dream about? Blonde: I was being chase by a vampire! Doctor: (giggles quitely) So... what was the scenery like? Blonde: I was running in a hall way. Doctor: Then what happened? Blonde: Well that''s the weird thing. In every single dream, the same thing happened. I always came to this door, but I couldn''t open it. I kept pushing the door and pushing the door, but it wouldn''t budge! Doctor: Did the door have any letters on it? Blonde: Yes it did. Doctor: And what did these letter spell? Blonde: It said "Pull"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam and a beautiful woman walk into a very posh Beverly Hills furrier. "Show the lady your finest mink!" the fellow exclaims. So the owner of the shop goes in back and comes out with an absolutely gorgeous full-length coat. As the lady tries it on, the furrier discreetly whispers to the man, "Ah, sir, that particular fur goes for $65,000." "No problem! I''ll write you a check!" "Very good, sir," says the shop owner. "Today is Saturday. You may come by on Monday to pick it up, after your check has cleared." So Sam and the woman leave. On Monday, the Morris returns. The store owner is outraged: "How dare you show your face in here? There wasn''t a single penny in your checking account!" "I just had to come by," grinned Sam, "to thank you for the most wonderful weekend of my life!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top Ten signs your co-worker is a computer hacker 10. You ticked him off once and your next phone bill was for $20,000. 9. He''s won the Publisher''s Clearing House sweepstakes 3 years running. 8. When asked for his phone number, he gives it in hex. 7. Seems strangely calm whenever the office computer network goes down. 6. Somehow gets HBO on his PC at work. 5. Mumbled, "Oh, puh-leeez" 95 times during the movie "The Net." 4. Massive 401k contribution made in half-cent increments. 3. His video dating profile lists "public-key encryption" among hobbies. 2. When his computer starts up, you hear, "Good Morning, Mr. President." 1. You hear him murmur, "Let''s see you use that Visa card now, Professor I-Don''t-Give-A''s-In-Computer-Science!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes were the dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life. "Were these dishes ever washed?" he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the grit and grime. She replied, "They''re as clean as Soap and Water could get them." He felt a bit apprehensive, but blessed the food anyway and started eating. The meal was really delicious and he said so, despite the dirty dishes. When dinner was over, the hostess took the dishes outside and called, "Here Soap! Here Water!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The zoology teacher asked a small boy to make a sentence using the word "possum." He answered, "Maw got horny and gave possum."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember, old folks are worth a fortune; they have silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet, and gas in their stomachs. You''re getting old when you don''t care where your wife goes, just so long as you don''t have to go along too. You''re getting old when you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn''t do anything the night before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday, I heard from a drug rep for Glaxo who told me that they are on the verge of launching a new herbal remedy that they think will take the market by storm. This drug sounds so promising that I want to suggest to my friends that they consider buying stock in the company. The drug is called Gingko Viagra, and its function is to help you remember what the fuck you are doing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Jane initially met Tarzan in the jungle, she was very very attracted to him, and during her questions about his life she asked him how he managed for sex. "Tarzan not know sex," he replied. Jane explained to him what sex was. Tarzan said, "Oh, Tarzan use soft hole in tree trunk." Horrified, she said, "Tarzan, you have it all wrong, but I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothes, laid down on the ground and spread her legs wide. "Here," she said, "you must put it in here." Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer to get a better look, got an enormous erection and gave her an almighty kick in the crotch. Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp, "What did you do that for?" Tarzan replied, "Tarzan always check for squirrels!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man from Hybernia, Who Rhymed himself into a hernia. He became adept At this practice except For occasional anti-climaxes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a plant''s favorite school year? KinderGARDEN!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the lunch lady say to the boiled egg? You''re in hot water now!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "Why does an elephant have a trunk?" Student: "Because it doesn''t have a glove compartment!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman sends her clothing out to the Chinese laundry. When it comes back, there are still stains in her panties. The next week she encloses a note to the Chinese laundryman that says, "Use more soap on panties." This goes on for several weeks, the woman sending the same note to the laundry. "Use more soap on panties." Finally, fed up, the Chinese man responded with his own note that said, "Use more paper on ass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, "Your first job will be to sweep the entire store." "But I''m a college graduate," the young man replied indignantly. "Oh, I''m sorry. I didn''t know that," said the manager. "Here, give me the broom. Let me show you how."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So there''s this Wizard who worked in a factory. Everything was satisfactory except that certain miscreants, taking advantage of his good nature, would steal his parking spot. This continued until he put up the following sign: "This parking space belongs to the Wizard. ... Violators will be toad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman and her husband interrupted their vacation to go to the dentist. "I want a tooth pulled, and I don''t want any pain killers because I''m in a big hurry," the woman said. "Just extract the tooth as quickly as possible, and we''ll be on our way." The dentist was quite impressed. "You''re certainly a courageous woman," he said. "Which tooth is it?" The woman turned to her husband and said, "Show him your tooth, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa. Hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg in a car crash? He''s all right now. How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path. What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall? "Dam." What do you call Santa''s helpers? Subordinate Clauses. What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand? Quatro sinko. What is a zebra? 26 sizes larger than an "A" bra. Where do you find a no legged dog? Right where you left him. Where do you get virgin wool from? Ugly, fast sheep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother, accompanied by her small daughter, was in New York City. The mother was trying to hail a cab, when her daughter noticed several wildly dressed women who were loitering on a nearby street corner. The mother finally hailed her cab and they both climbed in, at which point the young daughter asks her mother, "Mommy, what are all those ladies waiting for by that corner?" The mother replies, "Those ladies are waiting for their husbands to come by and pick them up on the way home from work." The cabby, upon hearing this exchange, turns to the mother and says, "Ah, C''mon lady! Tell your daughter the truth! For crying out loud... They''re hookers!" A brief period of silence follows, and the daughter then asks, "Mommy, do the hooker ladies have any children?" The mother replies, "Of course, Dear. Where do you think cabbies come from?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and a daughter are shopping in the mall, when the mother eyes an expensive fur coat. "This year," she says, "I think that I will buy my present instead of making you and dad shop for me." The daughter protests, "But mom, some helpless, poor creature has to suffer so that you can have this." "Don''t worry honey," says the mother, "your father won''t get the bill for a couple of weeks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL - 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR''S DOG 1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer 2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES: 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15 TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH ITS OWN 1993 MUSTANG, 5L, AUTO, EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800 COWS, NEVER BRED... ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE. 83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK -- $2000 GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE. FREE 1 CAN OF PORK & BEANS WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME. FOR SALE: LEE MAJORS (6 MILLION DOLLAR MAN) - $50 NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED *************CALL CHUBBIE NICE PARACHUTE: NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE SLIGHTLY STAINED', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A local church built a new sanctuary. They moved their very fine old pipe organ from to the new sanctuary. It was an intricate task that was completed successfully. The local news heralded, . . . "St. Paul Completes Organ Transplant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe and Frank were in the office, and noticed that someone had put up a suggestion box with some 3x5 cards next to it. Both decided that this was a great idea, and each took a card to fill out. Joe wrote, "The office workers should all be given raises!" When he looked at Frank''s card, it said "Can we all have raises, and keys to the executive washroom, and personal secretaries, and new company cars, and new coffee cups, and longer lunch breaks, and an extra three weeks vacation each year, and a holiday on St. Patrick''s Day, and Columbus Day and Martin Luther King''s Birthday?" Joe said, "Frank, that isn''t the right way of getting things changed around here - you shouldn''t put all of your begs in one ask-it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom, the fisherman, wrote the following to a mail order catalogue, "Please send me one of those gasoline engines for my boat you show on page 438, and if it''s any good, I''ll send you a check." A few days later, Tom received the following reply, "Please send check. If it''s any good, we''ll send the engine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Hunter was called to serve for jury duty, but asked to be excused because she didn''t believe in capital punishment and didn''t want her personal thoughts to prevent the trial from running its proper course. But the public defender liked her thoughtfulness and tried to convince her that she was appropriate to serve on the jury. "Madam," he explained, "this is not a murder trial! It''s a simple civil lawsuit. A wife is bringing this case against her husband because he gambled away the $12,000 he had promised to use to remodel the kitchen for her birthday." "Well, okay," agreed Mrs. Hunter, "I''ll serve. I guess I could be wrong about capital punishment after all!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying; DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG! posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor besides the cash register. He asked the store manager, "Is THAT the dog folks are supposed to beware of?" "Yep, that''s him," he replied. The stranger couldn''t help but be amused. "That certainly doesn''t look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?" "Because," the owner replied, "before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A World War II pilot is reminiscing before school children about his days in the air force. "In 1942," he says, "the situation was really tough. The Germans had a very strong air force. I remember," he continues, "one day I was protecting our bombers and suddenly, out of the clouds, these fokkers appeared. At this point, several of the children giggle. "I looked up, and right above me was one of them. I aimed at him and shot him down. They were swarming. I immediately realized that there was another fokker behind me." At hearing the pilot go on, the girls in the auditorium start to giggle and boys start to laugh. The teacher stands up and says, "I think I should point out that ''Fokker'' was the name of the German-Dutch aircraft company" "That''s true," says the pilot, "but these nazi fokkers were flying Messerschmidts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Viagra now available in liquid form. FDA officials today announced the release of the wonder drug Viagra in a new, easy-to-take liquid form. It is sold under the name "Mydixadrill." Now when men come home from work in the evening, they can pour themselves a stiff one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 22999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stalking into a police station late one night, a man demands to speak to the burglar who broke into his house. "Sorry, that''s against the law," says the desk sergeant. "You don''t get it," says the man. "I need to know how he got in without waking my wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#1 rule of a redneck- If duck tape don''t fix it (doubt it), mount it on the wall instead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar wearing a pair of jumper cables around his neck. The bartender looks at him and says, "Hey buddy, don''t try to start anything..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was missing her boyfriend, so she decided to write him the following brief letter: Dear Anthony, I''ve been unable to sleep since I broke off our engagement. Won''t you forgive and forget? Your absence is breaking my heart. I was a fool... nobody can take your place. I love you. All my love, Kathy xoxo P.S. Congratulations on winning this week''s lottery...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bernie was invited to his friend''s home for dinner. Morris, the host, called his wife by many endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice. After all these years, you still call your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head and whispered, "To tell the truth, I forgot her name years ago."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the football game with the 0-0 score? Never mind, it''s pointless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Henry goes to confession and says, "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. Last night I was with seven different women." The priest says, "Take seven lemons, squeeze them into a glass and drink the juice without pausing." "Will that cleanse me of my sins, Father?" "No," replies the priest. "But it''ll wipe that silly grin off your face."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This man walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder and the bar tender asks him, "What''s your newt''s name?" and the man replies, "Tiny" and the bar tender says, "Why is he called Tiny?" and the man replies, "Because he is minute." (minute means small)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that when she sits around the house, she dosen''t just sit around the house, she sits around the whole neighborhood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock "Who''s there?" "Boo" "Boo who?" "Why are you crying?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three babys - a blond, a redhead, and a brunet. They were fighting over who''s mommy had the best bra. The first baby says "My mom has a foam bra." The second says "My mom has gel straps." The blond baby says "Well, the tag on my moms bra says double D." The blond won the fight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last she threw a towel around her head & stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The female skier Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo)... The famous Olympic skier Picabo Street is not just an athlete, she is a nurse. She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital. She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, "Picabo, ICU".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside: The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!" My friend replied, "I''m already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor." Pastor questioned, "How come I don''t see you except at Christmas and Easter?" He whispered back, "I''m in the secret service."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. this Christmas. This isn''t for any religious constitutional reason. They simply have not been able to find three wise men and a virgin in the Nation''s capitol. There was, however, no problem finding enough asses to fill the stable.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I shall seek and find you, I shall take you to bed and have my way with you, I will make you ache, shake, and sweat until you moan and groan. I will make you beg for mercy, you will beg for me to stop. I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I''m finished with you. You will be weak for days. You have been warned, my love, by... THE FLU!! Now get your mind out of the gutter and go get a flu shot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on "Science & Nature." Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best form of birth control after 50? Nudity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 lbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? 45 minutes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does the bride always wear white? Because it''s good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t bunnies make noise when they have sex? Because they have cotton balls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts? Beer Nuts are $1, and Deer Nuts are always under a buck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy had been feeling down for so long that he finally decided to seek the aid of a psychiatrist. He went there, laid on the couch, spilled his guts then waited for the profound wisdom of the psychiatrist to make him feel better. The psychiatrist asked him a few questions, took some notes then sat thinking in silence for a few minutes with a puzzled look on his face. Suddenly, he looked up with an expression of delight and said, "Um, I think your problem is low self-esteem. It is very common among losers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During their silver anniversary, a wife reminded her husband: "Do you remember when you proposed to me, I was so overwhelmed that I didn''t talk for an hour?" The hubby replied: "Yes, honey, that was the happiest hour of my life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks past a mental hospital and hears a moaning voice "13.......13.......13.........13" the man looked over to the hospital and saw a hole in the wall, he looked through the hole and gets poked in the eye. The moaning voice then groaned ''14.........14.........14.......14.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so ugly you remind me of an elephants bottom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a toad and a horny toad? One says "Ribbit ribbit" and the other says "Rubbit rubbit".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kindergarden teacher had a pupil tell her he had found a frog. She inquired as to whether it was dead or alive. "Dead," she was informed. "How do you know?" she asked. "Because I pissed in his ear," said the child innocently. "You did WHAT?" squealed the teacher in surprise. "You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went ''Pssst''. He didn''t move!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and George W. Bush were set to face a firing squad in a small Central American country. Bill Clinton was the first one placed against the wall and just before the order was given he yelled out, "Earthquake!" The firing squad fell into a panic and Bill jumped over the wall and escaped in the confusion. Al Gore was the second one placed against the wall. The squad was reassembled and Al pondered what he had just witnessed. Again, before the order was given Al yelled out, "Tornado!" Again, the squad fell apart and Al slipped over the wall. The last person, George W. Bush, was placed against the wall. He was thinking, "I see the pattern here; just scream out something about a disaster and hop over the wall". He confidently refused the blindfold as the firing squad was reassembled. As the rifles were raised in his direction, he grinned from ear to ear and yelled, "Fire!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was driving up the interstate late one night when he was amazed to see a weird creature overtake him at a great speed. He accelerated in an attempt to catch up with it, but the creature was far too quick for him and he dimly saw it run off the highway on an exit. The driver followed, only to see it jump over a hedge and disappear into some woods. Nearby stood a farmhouse; the driver stopped his car, walked up to the door and knocked. The driver apologized to the farmer for bothering him and asked him about the creature. "Oh yes," said the farmer, "that''s one of my specially bred three-legged chickens. I bred them so that when we have roast chicken for dinner, my wife, my son and myself can have a chicken leg each." "Really?" asked the man. "That''s amazing! How do they taste?" "I don''t know," replied the farmer. "I haven''t been able to catch one yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of managers was given the assignment to measure the height of a flagpole. They got their ladders and tape measures and went out to the flagpole. However, the measurement job turned out to be much more difficult than any of them had expected, with some of them falling off the ladders, some dropping their tape measures and so on, and the whole thing had just turned into a big disaster. After a while, an engineer happened to walk by and saw what the managers were attempting to do. She walked over, pulled the flagpole out of the ground, and laid it flat on the ground. She measured it from end to end, gave the measurement to one of the managers and then walked away without saying a word. After the engineer was out of sight, one manager turned to another and laughed as he shook his head. "Now that''s just like an engineer! We''re looking for the height and she gives us the length!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was reading Bible stories to his young son. He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." His son asked, "What happened to the flea?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to his doctor and says, "I don''t think my wife''s hearing is as good as it used to be. What should I do?" The doctor replies, "Try this test to find out for sure. When your wife is in the kitchen doing dishes, stand fifteen feet behind her and ask her a question, if she doesn''t respond keep moving closer asking the question until she hears you." The man goes home and sees his wife preparing dinner. He stands fifteen feet behind her and says, "What''s for dinner, honey?" He gets no response, so he moves to ten feet behind her and asks again. Still no response, so he moves to five feet. Again, no answer. Finally he stands directly behind her and says, "Honey, what''s for dinner?" She replies, "For the fourth time, I SAID CHICKEN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the first day of their Honeymoon, the blonde bride slipped into a sexy but sweet nightie and, with great anticipation, crawled into bed, only to find that her new Catholic husband had settled down on the couch. When she asked him why he was apparently not going to make love to her, he replied, "Because it''s Lent." Almost in tears, she remarked, "Well, that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard! To whom did you lend it, and for how long?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So Many Men, So Few Who Can Afford Me. God Made Us Sisters, Prozac Made Us Friends. My Mother Is A Travel Agent For Guilt Trips. Princess, Having Had Sufficient Experience With Princes, Seeks Frog. Coffee, Chocolate, Men ... Some Things Are Just Better Rich. Don''t Treat Me Any Differently Than You Would The Queen Warning: I Have An Attitude And I Know How To Use It. Of Course I Don''t Look Busy...I Did It Right The First Time. Do Not Start With Me. You Will Not Win. Sorry If I Looked Interested. I''m Not. If You Want Breakfast In Bed, Sleep In The Kitchen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The perfect man is gentle Never cruel or mean He has a handsome smile And keeps his car so clean. The perfect man likes children And will raise them by your side He will be a good father A good husband to his bride. The perfect man loves cooking Cleaning and vacuuming too He''ll do anything in his power To convey his feelings to you. The perfect man is sweet Writing poetry from your name He''s a best friend to your mother And kisses away your pain. He never has made you cry Or hurt you in any way Oh, fuck this stupid poem The perfect man is gay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every Sunday, a little old lady placed $1,000 in the collection plate. This went on for weeks until the priest, overcome with curiosity, approached her. "Sister, I couldn''t help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate," he stated. "Why yes," she replied, "every week my son sends me money, and what I don''t need I give to the church." "That''s wonderful, how much does he send you?" "Oh, $2,000 a week." "Your son is very successful, what does he do for a living?" "He is a veterinarian," she answered. "That is a very honorable profession. Where does he practice?" "Well, he has one cat house in Kansas City and another in Dallas."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A musician who joined an orchestra on a cruise ship was having difficulty keeping time with the rest of the band. Finally, the captain said, "Either you learn to keep time or I''ll throw you overboard. . . . It''s up to you, sync or swim."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny went up to his father and asked, "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?" Johnny''s father replied, "Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, ''cause I still have mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic. "Here is the situation," she said. "A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows he can''t swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?" A girl raised her hand and asked, "To draw out all his savings?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cannibal took his young son for a walk in the jungle. They came across a beautiful, naked girl lying asleep on the ground. The boy got excited and said, "Let''s eat her now, Dad!" But the father said, "No, I have a better idea. Let''s bring her home and eat your mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him, "Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your trouble to bed with you." "I know," said the man, "but I can''t. My wife refuses to sleep alone..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Worried that they hadn''t heard anything for days from the widow in the apartment next door, the mother said to her son, "Tony, would you go next door and see how Old Mrs. Pierpoint is?" A few minutes later, Tony returned. "Well, is she all right?" asked the mother. "She''s fine, but she''s rather annoyed with you," remarked Tony. "At me?" the mother exclaimed. "Whatever for?" Tony replied, "Mrs. Pierpoint said it''s none of your business how old she is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a small town in the US, there is a rather sizeable factory that hires only married men. Concerned about this, a local woman called on the manager and asked him, "Why is it you limit your employees to married men? Is it because you think us women are week, dumb, cantankerous...or what?" "Not at all, Ma''am," the manager replied. "It is because our employees are used to obeying orders, are accustomed to being shoved around, know how to keep their mouths shut and don''t pout when I yell at them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The morning after their honeymoon night, the wife says to her husband, "You know, you''re really a lousy lover!" The husband replies, "How would you know after only 30 seconds?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy got on a bus one day and sat in the aisle seat beside an elderly lady. A few minutes later, he couldn''t control himself and had to let loose a big noisy fart. Embarrassed, he tried to make conversation with the lady and asked her "Do you by any chance have today''s paper?" The lady looked at him and said "No, but the next time we pass by a tree, I''ll grab you a handful of leaves."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends when the subject of marriage counseling came up. "Oh, we''ll never need that. My husband and I have a great relationship," the wife explained. "He was a communications major in college and I majored in theater arts." "He communicates real well and I just act like I''m listening."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe''s grandfather left him ten million dollars, and the next week Denise agreed to marry him. After three months of married life, Joe noticed that his beautiful new wife was ignoring him more and more. On the rare occasion that she would go to bed with him, she would be indifferent, or even worse, called out other men''s names! Whenever they went out in public, she ignored him and flirted with other men. Finally, he decided to confront her. "Denise" he said, "was the only reason you married me was because my grandfather left me ten million dollars when he died?" "Don''t be ridiculous," she replied, "I don''t care who gave you the money!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a wedding rehearsal, the pastor told the father of the bride, "As you give your daughter''s hand to the bridegroom, you should say something nice to him." The father, a department store manager, took the advice. During the wedding ceremony, he placed his daughter''s hand on his son-in-law''s arm and said, "No deposit, no return."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys are about to be executed and they are asked what they wish to have for their last meal. The Italian responds, Pepperoni Pizza, which he is served and then executed. The Frenchmen requests a Fillet Mignon, which he is served and then executed. The Newf requests a plate of strawberries. "STRAWBERRIES ????" "Yes, Strawberries." He is told, "But they are out of season!" "So, I''ll wait."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was this kid named Oddy, He always missed the Potty, He went some poops, and shouted out oops, Because Oddy Missed the Potty', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the number 0 say to the number 8? "Hey, nice belt!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Perfect Breakfast: You''re sitting at the table and: your son is on the cover of the box of Wheaties.... your mistress is on the cover of Playboy ... and your wife is on the back of the milk carton...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy, a dishonest lawyer, bribed one of his client''s jurors to hold out for a charge of manslaughter, fearing the murder charge being brought by the state. The jury was out for days before returning with the verdict: Manslaughter! Later, as Murphy paid off the corrupt juror, he asked him if he had a hard time convincing the other jurors to see things his way. "Boy, did I!" said the juror. "They kept voting to acquit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lonely wife brought a man she had just met at a bar home to her bedroom one evening when she thought her husband was out of town. They immediately tore each other''s clothes off and started going at it. She sat up quickly in bed as she heard the key in the lock. "Quick!" she said to the man, "it''s my husband! You''ve got to get out of here quick!" "Where''s the back door?" the man asked as he grabbed his clothes. "There isn''t one," she replied. "Where would you like one?" he asked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A writer died and was given the option of going to heaven or hell. She decided to check out each place first. As the writer descended into the fiery pits, she saw row upon row of writers chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they were repeatedly whipped with thorny lashes. "Oh my," said the writer. "Let me see heaven now." A few moments later, as she ascended into heaven, she saw rows of writers, chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they, too, were whipped with thorny lashes. "Wait a minute!" said the writer, "this is just as bad as hell." "Oh no, it''s not," replied an unseen voice. "Here, your work gets published."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnnie was late for class, and when he saw that the door was already closed, he opened it and went into the classroom tentatively. He very quietly shut the door and tiptoed to his seat hoping not to get the teacher after him. This upset the teacher, who said him, "Johnnie, is this how your father would have come in - late and sneaking to his seat? Go out and try it again, and get it right this time!" So, Little Johnnie left the room and shut the door behind him quietly, as he''d come in. Then a moment later, he flung open the door with a clatter and stomped back into the room with a lit cigarette dangling from his lips. He slammed the door behind him, put his cigarette out on the carpet with his foot and said, "So Honey, didn''t expect ME, did ya?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to a Texan on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their home lives. "Last night I made love to my wife four times," the Frenchman bragged, "and this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored me." "Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times," the Italian responded, "and this morning she made me a wonderful omelet and told me she could never love another man." When the Texan remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked, "And how many times did you make love to your wife last night?" "Once," he replied. "Only once?" the Italian arrogantly snorted. "And what did she say to you this morning?" "Don''t stop."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The head of a small industrial company posted a slogan all around the office and plant saying, "Do it now!" with the hope of getting better results from his workers. Some weeks later, when asked why he was removing the slogan signs, he said, "It worked too well. The bookkeeper skipped with $20,000, the chief clerk eloped with the best secretary I''ve ever had, three salesmen asked for raises, and the workers in the factory joined the union and are out on strike."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First, you get a little hoarse. Then, you get a little buggy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn''t have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn''t have to hear about the way his mother cooked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, "They wouldn''t take me out while I was alive, I don''t want them to take me out when I''m dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Walking up to a department store''s fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, "I want to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?" "Only one kiss per yard," replied the smirking male clerk. "That''s fine," replied the girl. "I''ll take ten yards." With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out and wrapped the cloth, then teasingly held it out. The girl snapped up the package and pointed to a little old man standing beside her. "Grandpa will pay the bill," she smiled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A vacationing golfer was out playing on a course that he had never played before. He hired a caddie from the pro shop to show him the layout of the course, and help him decide what shots to play. On the first tee, the golfer missed his shot, and it dribbled forward about 15 yards. He was slightly embarrassed, but determined to play a better second shot. He hit his second shot into the bordering fairway, and his third shot into a sand trap. By the time he holed out on this Par 4, he was 6 over par. The man turned to his caddie and said, "Well, I have never played this badly before!" To which the caddie replied, "I didn''t realize you had played before, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy went to a psychiatrist because he was having severe problems with his sex life. The psychiatrist asked him a lot of questions, but he couldn''t get a clear picture of the problems. Finally he asked, "Do you ever watch your girlfriend''s face while you''re having sex?" "Well, yes, I did once." "Well, how did she look?" "Oh boy, she looked very angry!" At this point the psychiatrist felt that he was really getting somewhere. "Well that''s very interesting, we must look into this further. Now tell me, you say that you have only seen your girlfriend''s face once during sex. That seems somewhat unusual. How did it occur that you saw her face that time?" "She was watching us through the window."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a cowboy bar and ordered a beer just as President Bush appeared on the television. After a few sips, he looked up at the television and mumbled, "Now, there''s the biggest horse''s ass I''ve ever seen." A customer at the end of the bar quickly stood up, walked over to him, and decked him. A few minutes later, as the man was finishing his beer, Mrs. Bush appeared on the television. "She''s a horse''s ass too," the man. This time, a customer at the other end of the bar quickly stood up, walked over to him, and knocked him off his stool. "Damn it!" the man said, climbing back up to the bar. "This must be Bush country!" "Nope," the bartender replied. "Horse country!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Leroy was at home doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine." At that moment, his mother came in and heard that he was cursing. "Leroy, what are you doing?! Why are you saying that?" Little Leroy answered, "I''m doing my math homework, Mom." She said, "And is that what your teacher taught you?" He replied, "Yes." The next day, the mother, worried about the education her son is receiving, goes to Little Leroy''s school to talk to the teacher. The mother said to his Math teacher, "I would like to know what you are teaching my son in math." The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition problems." Little Leroy''s mother asked, "Are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?" When the teacher stopped laughing she replied, "Not at all! What I taught them was two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH IS four."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He investigates ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL CRANIAL INVERSION. He is not a SEX MACHINE - He is ROMANTICALLY AUTOMATED. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY. He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES - He has an INTROSPECTIVE PORNOGRAPHIC MOMENT. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A beautiful woman walked into an orchard and found a lovely pool in it. She decided to go skinny-dipping. She looked around, didn''t see anyone, and undressed. Just as she was about to dive in, the orchard owner appeared from behind the bush where he was hiding all along and told her that swimming was prohibited. "You could have told me that before I undressed!" she scolded him. He replied, "Swimming is prohibited, undressing isn''t."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A noted sex therapist realized that people often lie about the frequency of their encounters, so he devised a test to tell for certain how often someone had sex. To prove his theory, he filled up an auditorium with people, and went down the line asking each person to smile. Using the size of the person''s smile, the therapist was able to guess accurately how often each person had sex. The last man in line was grinning from ear to ear. "Twice a day," the therapist guessed, but was surprised when the man said no. "Once a day, then?" Again the answer was no. "Twice a week?" "No." "Twice a month?" "No." When the doctor asked, "Once a year?" the man finally said yes. The therapist was angry that his theory hadn''t worked with this individual, and he asked the man, "What the heck are you so happy about?" The man answered, "Tonight''s the night!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Delivering his speech at the opening banquet of a national convention, the visiting minister told several anecdotes he expected to repeat at meetings the next day. Because he wanted to use the jokes again, he requested that the reporters omit them from any accounts they might turn in to their newspapers. A cub reporter, in commenting on the speech, ended his piece with the following: "The minister told a number of stories that cannot be printed here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women were paired together as partners in a club tournament and met on the putting green for the first time. After introductions, the first golfer asked the second, "What''s your handicap?" "Oh, I''m a scratch golfer," the other replied. "Really!" exclaimed the first woman, suitably impressed that she was paired up with such a strong player. "Yes, I write down all my good scores and scratch out the bad ones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says, "I''m sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are moving about in a Walmart when their carts collide. One says to the other, "Excuse me, but I''m looking for my wife." "What a coincidence, so am I, and I''m getting a little desperate." "Well, maybe I can help you. What does your wife look like?" "She''s tall, with dark hair, long legs, firm boobs, and a tight ass. What''s your wife look like?" "Never mind, let''s look for yours!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This will warm your heart, just when you have lost faith in human kindness.... Dear Safety Harbor Middle School, God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior citizens luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at the Safety Harbor Assisted Home for the Aged. All of my family has passed away. I am all alone now and it''s nice to know that someone is thinking of me. God bless you for your kindness to an old forgotten lady. My roommate is 95 and always had her own radio, but before I received one, she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was napping. The other day her radio fell off the night stand and broke into a lot of pieces. It was awful and she was in tears. She asked if she could listen to mine, and I said kiss my ass. Thank you for that opportunity. Sincerely, Edna Walters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hickory, Dickory Dock Three mice ran up the clock The clock struck one... The rest got away with minor injuries', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so the catcher walked up to have a talk with him. "I''ve figured out your problem," he told the young southpaw. "You always lose control at the same point in every game." "When is that?" "Right after the National Anthem."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into a vet''s waiting room. She''s dragging a wet rabbit on a leash. The rabbit does NOT want to be there. "Sit, Fluffy," she says. Fluffy glares at her, sopping wet, jumps up on another customer''s lap, getting water all over him. "I said ''SIT''! Now there''s a good Fluffy," says the woman, slightly embarrassed. Fluffy, wet already, squats in the middle of the room and pees. The woman, mortally embarrassed, shouts, "Darn it Fluffy, will you be good?!" Fluffy then starts a fight with a Doberman and pursues it out of the office. As the woman leaves to go after it, she turns to the rest of the flabbergasted customers and says, "Pardon me, I''ve just washed my hare and I can''t do a thing with it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. O''Donovan was walking down O''Connell Street in Dublin, and coming in the opposite direction was Father O''Rafferty. "Hello," said the Father, "And how is Mr. O''Donovan? Didn''t I marry you two years ago?" She replied, "You did that, Father." "And are there any little ones yet?" "No, not yet, Father," she said "Well now, I''m going to Rome next week, and I''ll light a candle for you." "Oh, thank you, Father," and away she went. Several years later they met again. "Well now, Mrs. O''Donovan," said the Father, "how are you?" "Oh, very well," said she. "And tell me," he said, "have you any little ones yet?" "Oh yes, Father. I''ve had three sets of twins, and four singles -- ten in all." "Now isn''t that wonderful?" he said, "and how is your wonderful husband?" "Oh," she said, "he''s gone to Rome to blow out your damned candle!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man in his eighties got up and was putting on his coat, when his wife said, "Where are you going?" The elderly man replied, "To the doctor''s." Surprised, his wife asked "Why, are you sick?" "No," he said, "I''m going to get me some of those new Viagra pills." With that, his equally elderly wife got up out of her rocker and started putting on her sweater. Surprised, he asked, "Where are you going?" "I''m going to the doctor, too." "Why?" She said, matter-of-factly, "If you''re going to start using that rusty old thing again, I''m going to get a tetanus shot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hunters went moose hunting every winter without success. Finally, they came up with a fool-proof plan. They got a very authentic female moose costume and learned the mating call of a female moose. The plan was to hide in the costume, lure the bull, then come out of the costume and shoot it. They set themselves up on the edge of a clearing, donned their costume, and began to give the moose love call. Before long, their call was answered as a bull came crashing out of the forest and into the clearing. When the bull was close enough, the guy in front said, "Okay, let''s get out and get him." After a moment that seemed like an eternity, the guy in the back shouted, "The zipper is stuck! What are we going to do?" The guy in the front said, "Well, I''m going to start nibbling grass, but you''d better brace yourself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love Marriage: Acceptance test possible you can try before you Buy. Arranged Marriage: Product is sold on an as is where is basis. Product once sold will not be taken back! Arranged Marriage is like Unix..boring n colorless... still extremely reliable n robust. Love Marriage is like Windows, beautiful n seductive........ yet one never knows when it will crash........', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A passenger jet was suffering through a severe thunderstorm. As the passengers were being bounced around by the turbulence, a young woman turned to a minister sitting next to her and with a nervous laugh asked, "Reverend, you''re a man of God, can''t you do something about this storm?" To which he replied, "Lady, I''m in sales, not management."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father watched his daughter playing in the garden. He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and innocent his little girl was. He went over to her and noticed she was looking at two spiders mating. "Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?" she asked. "They''re mating," her father replied. "What do you call the spider on top, Daddy?" she asked. "That''s a daddy longlegs," her father answered. "So, the other one is a mommy longlegs?" the little girl asked. "No," her father replied. "Both of them are daddy longlegs." The little girl thought for a moment, then took her foot and stomped them flat. "Well, we''re not having THAT sort of thing going on in our garden".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old country doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby. It was so far out, there was no electricity. When the doctor arrived, no one was home except for the laboring mother and her 5-year-old child. The doctor instructed the child to hold a lantern high so he could see, while he helped the woman deliver the baby. The child did so, the mother pushed and after a little while, the Doctor lifted the newborn baby by the feet and spanked him on the bottom to get him to take his first breath. The doctor then asked the 5-year-old what he thought of the baby. "Hit him again," the 5-year-old said. "He shouldn''t have crawled up there in the first place!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail with her girlfriends when an exceptionally tall, handsome, extremely sexy young man entered. He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes away from him. The young man noticed her overly-attentive stare and walked directly toward her. Before she could offer her apologies for being so rude, the young man said to her, "I''ll do anything, absolutely anything, that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $20, on one condition." Flabbergasted, the woman asked, "What is the condition?" The young man replied, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words." The woman considered his proposition for a moment, reached into her purse and slowly counted out four $5 bills, which she pressed into the young man''s hand along with her address. She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly, meaningfully said... "Clean my house..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom was cleaning the house when she found her son''s hidden stash of S&M and sexual bondage magazines. Naturally, she was very upset and she didn''t know what to do. So, she waited until her husband got home to discuss it with him. After she showed him the magazines, she asked him, "Well, what are you going to do about it?" "I don''t know what to do." he told her. "I really don''t think I should give him a spanking for this!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was visitor''s day at the lunatic asylum. All the inmates were standing in the courtyard and singing "Ave Maria," and singing it beautifully. Oddly, each of them was holding a red apple in one hand and tapping it rhythmically with a pencil. A visitor listened in wonderment to the performance and then approached the choir. "I am a retired choir director," he said. "This is one of the best choirs I have ever heard." "Yes, I''m very proud of them," said the conductor. "You should take them on tour," said the visitor. "What are they called?" "Surely that''s obvious," replied the conductor. "They are the ''Moron Tapanapple Choir''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('See if you can do this: Read each line aloud This is this cat This is is cat This is how cat This is to cat This is keep cat This is a cat This is dumbass cat This is busy cat This is for cat This is forty cat This is seconds cat Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a man in his back yard trying to fly a kite. He throws the kite up in the air, the wind catches it for a few seconds then it comes crashing back down. He tries this a few more times all the while his wife is watching from her kitchen window. Muttering to herself how men need to be told how to do everything she opens the window and yells to her husband "You need more tail." The man turns with a confused look on his face and says, "Make up your mind, Honey. Last night you told me to go fly a kite!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy asked his mother: Mummy, why are you white and I am black? Don''t even ask me that, when I remember that party..., you are lucky that you don''t bark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the store the other day and I was in there for only about 5 minutes. When I came out there was a motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket. So I went up to him and said "Come on, buddy, how about giving me a break?" He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. So I called him a pencil-necked Nazi. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for worn tires! So I called him a piece of horse shit. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket! This went on for about 20 minutes; the more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote. I didn''t care. My car was parked around the corner. I try to have a little fun each day. It''s important.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were on their way to Heaven. God told them that the stairway to Heaven was 1000 steps, and that on every 5th step He would tell them a joke. He told them not to laugh at any of the jokes along the way or else they would not be able to enter Heaven. The brunette went first and started laughing on the 45th step, so she could not enter Heaven. The redhead went next and started laughing on the 200th step, so she could not enter Heaven either. Then, it was the blonde''s turn. When she got to the 999th step, she started laughing. "Why are you laughing?" God asked. "I didn''t tell a joke." "I know," the blonde replied. "I just got the first joke."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, said Little Johnny, "I''m late for football practice. Would you please do my homework for me?" Little Johnny''s father said irately, "Son, it just wouldn''t be right." "That''s okay," replied Little Johnny "You could at least give it a try, couldn''t you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and self- pitying. She moaned to her mom and brother, "Nobody loves me ... the whole world hates me!" Her brother, busily occupied playing a game, hardly looked up at her and passed on this encouraging word: "That''s not true, Mary. Some people don''t even know you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a clean joke? Bob took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Bobs neighbor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two men in a restroom, in stalls directly next to each other. Man #1 says "Hi there." Man #2, trying not to be rude, says, "Um...Hi" After a short silence, Man #1 speaks again saying, "So, how are things?" Man #2 replies, "Good.... I guess." Man #1 says, "Okay, honey, I have to go now, every time I talk to you on my phone this guy answers, bye."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Clinton and the Pope died on the same day, and due to an administrative foul up, Clinton was sent to heaven and the Pope was sent to hell. The Pope explained the situation to the devil, he checked out all of the paperwork, and the error was acknowledged. The Pope was told, however, that it would take about 24 hours to fix the problem and correct the error. The next day, the Pope was called in and the devil said his good byes as he went off to heaven. On his way up, he met Clinton who was on his way down. They stopped to chat. "Sorry about the mix up" says the Pope. "No problem," replies Clinton. "Well, I''m really excited about going to heaven." Clinton asks, "Why''s that?" "Well, I''ve always wanted to meet the Virgin Mary." President Clinton replies, "Sorry, but you''re a day late".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the crowded elevator descended, Mrs. Silverman became increasingly furious with her husband, who was delighted to be pressed against a gorgeous young blonde woman. As the elevator stopped at the main floor, the blonde suddenly whirled, slapped Mr. Silverman, and said, "That will teach you to pinch!" Bewildered, Mr. Silverman was halfway to the parking lot with his wife when he choked, "I . . . didn''t pinch that girl." "Of course you didn''t," replied his wife, consolingly. "I did."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross the Atlantic Ocean with the Titanic? A: Halfway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys were working on a high rise building project: Steve, Bill and Charlie. Steve falls off and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away, Charlie says, "Someone should go and tell his wife." Bill says, "OK, I''m pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I''ll do it." 2 hours later, he comes back carrying a 6-pack. Charlie says, "Where did you get that, Bill?" "Steve''s wife gave it to me." "That''s unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you the beer?" Bill says, "Well not exactly. When she answered the door, I said to her, ''You must be Steve''s widow.''" She said, "''No, I''m not a widow." And I said, "Wanna bet me a six-pack?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. "Red meat is awful. Soft drinks erode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. "But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?" A old man in the front row stood up and said, "Wedding cake!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doc, I think my son has VD, a patient told his urologist on the phone. "The only woman he''s screwed is our maid." "Okay, don''t be hard on him. He''s just a kid," the medic soothed. "Get him in here right away and I''ll take care of him." "But I''ve been screwing the maid too, and I''ve got the same symptoms he has." "Then you come in with him and I''ll fix you both up," replied the doctor. "Well," the man admitted, "I think my wife has it too." "Oh crap!" the physician roared. "That means we''ve all got it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young ensign had nearly completed his first overseas tour of duty when he was given an opportunity to display his ability at getting the ship under way. With a stream of crisp commands, he had the decks buzzing with men and soon, the ship had left port and was steaming out of the channel. The ensign''s efficiency has been remarkable. In fact, the deck was abuzz with talk that he had set a new record for getting a destroyer under way. The ensign glowed at his accomplishment and was not all surprised when another seaman approached him with a message from the captain. He was, however, a bit surprised to find that it was a radio message, and he was even more surprised when he read, "My personal congratulations upon completing your underway preparation exercise according to the book and with amazing speed. In your haste, however, you have overlooked one of the unwritten rules - make sure the captain is aboard before getting under way."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I cannot see, I cannot pee; I cannot chew, I cannot screw; Oh, my God, what can I do? My memory shrinks, My hearing stinks, No sense of smell - I look like hell My mood is bad - can you tell? My body''s drooping, Have trouble pooping; The Golden Years have come at last - The Golden years can kiss my ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money. The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn''t been paid. The collections manager left a voice-mail for them saying, "We can''t ship your new order until you pay for the last one." The next day the collections manager received a collect phone call, "Please cancel the order. We can''t wait that long."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands. When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset. "You''re running around with other women," she charged. "You''re being unreasonable," Adam responded. "You''re the only woman on earth." The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve. "What do you think you''re doing?" Adam demanded. "Counting your ribs," said Eve.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The minister was passing a group of young teens sitting on the Church lawn and stopped to ask what they were doing. "Nothing much, Pastor," replied one boy. "We were just seeing who can tell the biggest lie about their sex life." "Boys, boys, boys!" he scolded. "I''m shocked. When I was your age, I never even thought about sex." In unison they all replied, "You win!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On wall in ladies room: "My husband follows me everywhere." Written just below it: "I do not."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent FDA study, the United States government doctors who were conducting studies on test drugs administered weekly doses of VIAGRA to an equal number of doctors and lawyers. While the majority of the doctors achieved enhanced sexual prowess, the lawyers simply grew taller. The researchers are at a loss to explain the phenomenon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harry walks into his supervisor''s office. "Boss," he says, "We''re doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff." "We''re short-handed, Harry," the boss replies. "I can''t give you the day off." "Thanks, boss," says Harry, "I knew I could count on you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A somewhat advanced society has figured how to package basic knowledge in pill form. A student, needing some learning, goes to the pharmacy and asks what kind of knowledge pills are available. The pharmacist says, "Here''s a pill for English literature." The student takes the pill and swallows it and has new knowledge about English literature! "What else do you have?" asks the student. "Well, I have pills for art history, biology, and world history," replies the pharmacist. The student asks for these, and swallows them and has new knowledge about those subjects. Then the student asks, "Do you have a pill for math?" The pharmacist says, "Wait just a moment," goes back into the storeroom, brings back a whopper of a pill, and plunks it on the counter. "I have to take that huge pill for math?" inquires the student. The pharmacist replied, "Well, you know math always was a little hard to swallow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snow White received a camera as a gift. She happily took many pictures of the Dwarves and their surroundings. When she finished her first batch, she took the film to be developed. After a week or so, she went to get the finished photos. The clerk said the photos were not back from the processor. Snow White was so disappointed that she started to cry. The clerk, trying to console her, said kindly, "Don''t worry, someday your prints will come."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was seen walking through downtown with a desk strapped to his back, a typewriter under one arm, and a wastebasket under the other. He was stopped by a policeman, asked what he was doing, and arrested when he replied, . . . "Impersonating an office, sir!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golfer, encountering a genie, was granted one wish. The man thought a while and said, "Well, I''ve always been embarrassed by being rather small, if you know what I mean; could you make me larger?" "Done," said the genie and disappeared. Continuing his game, the man noticed an immediate change in his "size." Within several holes, it was down to his knee, and by the eighteenth, it had crept into his sock. After holing his final putt, the man hurriedly returned to where he''d met the genie. "Problem?" inquired the genie. "Yes," the man responded, "Do you think I could trouble you for one more wish?" "And what might that be?" asked the genie. "Could you make my legs longer?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why don''t witches like to ride their brooms when they''re angry? A. They''re afraid of flying off the handle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When White man found this land, Indians were running it. No Taxes... No Debt... Plenty Buffalo... Plenty beaver! Women did most (all) of the work. Medicine Man free! Indian men hunted and fished all the time! Only White man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a German, an Italian and a Newfie on death row. The warden gave them a choice of three ways to die..... 1. To be shot 2. To be hung 3. To be injected with the AIDS virus for a slow death The German said, "Shoot me right in the head." Boom, he was dead instantly. The Italian said "Just hang me." With a snap of the rope he was dead. Then the Newfie said, "Give me some of that AIDS stuff." They gave him the shot and the Newfie fell down laughing. The guards looked at each other and wondered what was wrong with this guy. The Newfie said "Give me another one of those shots." The guards injected him again and now the Newfie was laughing so hard that tears rolled down his cheeks and he was doubled over laughing. Finally the warden said "What is wrong with you?" The Newfie replied, "You guys are so stupid...............I''m wearing a condom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? His lips are moving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The United States Treasury has announced they are recalling the new Minnesota quarters. We are recalling all of the new Minnesota quarters that were recently issued, Treasury Undersecretary said in a press conference Monday. This comes in the wake of numerous reports to this agency that the quarters will not work in parking meters, toll booths, vending machines, pay phones, or other coin-operated devices. We believe the problem lies in a design flaw. The winning design for the Minnesota quarter was submitted by Sven Petersen of New Ulm, Minnesota. Sven commented, "Apparently, da duct tape holding da two dimes ana nickel togedder keeps yamming da coin-slot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BLONDE woman goes to the post office to buy stamps for her Christmas cards. She says to the clerk, "May I have 50 Christmas stamps?" The clerk says, "What denomination?" The woman says, "God help us. Has it come to this? Give me 6 Catholic, 12 Presbyterian, 10 Lutheran and 22 Baptists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two blondes who went deep into the woods searching for a Christmas tree. After hours of subzero temperatures and a few close calls with hungry wolves, one blonde turned to the other and said, "I''m chopping down the next tree I see. I don''t care whether it''s decorated or not!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was out walking one day and went by a retirement home. As he passed the front lawn, he saw nine old ladies, basking in the sun in lounge chairs. When he looked closer, he realized that they were all stark naked. He went to the door and rang the bell. When the director answered the door, the man asked if he realized there were nine naked old ladies laying in the sun on the front lawn. The director said, "Yes," and went on to explain that the old ladies were all retired prostitutes living at the retirement home, and they were having a yard sale.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tired of having to stare at the luscious young kitten on the other side of the chain link fence, bold Tommy Tomcat decided to visit her one day. Settling back on his haunches, he gave a mighty leap and landed on the other side; impressed, the lovely cat sauntered over. "That was quite a leap," she remarked. "Want to go somewhere and cuddle?" "Afraid not," said Tommy, a pained expressions on his face. "The fence was higher than I thought."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three Irishmen, Paddy, Sean and Seamus, were stumbling home from the pub late one night and found themselves on the road which led past the old graveyard. "Come have a look over here," says Paddy, "It''s Michael O''Grady''s grave, God bless his soul. He lived to the ripe old age of 87." "That''s nothing," says Sean, "here''s one named Patrick O''Tool. It says here that he was 95 when he died." Just then, Seamus yells out, "Good God, here''s a fella that got to be 145!" "What was his name?" asks Paddy. Seamus stumbles around a bit, awkwardly lights a match to see what else is written on the stone marker, and exclaims, "Miles, from Dublin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The long term implications of drug research and medical procedures must be fully considered. Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and Viagra than is spent on Alzheimer''s Disease research. Medical researchers believe that by the year 2030 there will be a significant number of people wandering around with huge breasts and erections who can''t remember what to do with them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them. The beech says to the birch: "Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?" The birch says it cannot tell. Just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling. The birch says, "Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?" The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree and replies: "It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever put my pecker in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If however you do need to take Viagra, remember to swallow them quickly otherwise you''ll get a stiff neck. A shipment of Viagra was highjacked today. Police have put out an All-Points bulletin: Be on the lookout for two hardened criminals! They will face a stiff sentence when convicted and they''ll surely be sent to a Penal Institution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top 10 Summer Camps you should not send your kids to: 10. Tommy Lee''s---------- Camp Kickachickee 9. Lorena Bobbit''s------ Camp Cutaweewee 8. Tanya Harding''s------ Camp Wackaneenee 7. Kenneth Star''s------- Camp Catchacrookee 6. Louis Farakahn''s----- Camp Killawhitey 5. O.J. Simpson''s------- Camp Killachickee 4. Michael Jackson''s---- Camp Wannabewhitey 3. President Clinton''s-----Camp Getahoochie 2. Ellen Degeneras''s-------Camp Lickacoochie And the number one camp not to send your kid to: 1. Monica Lewinsky''s---- Camp Suckapeepee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Why are you knocking? I''ve got a doorbell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two best friends were staying at a hotel.Their room was on the tenth floor. One day, because the lift was under repair, they started climbing the stairs. On reaching the first floor, one friend remembered something and said - First Friend : Hey listen! I want to tell you something. Second Friend : Go on, speak. First friend : No, no, you may get angry. I''ll tell you later. This conversation happened whenever they reached a floor. Finally,when they reached in front of their room - First Friend : Hey listen! I want to tell you something. Second Friend (irritated) : Please speak then. First Friend : Friend,we forgot to collect the keys from the desk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man knocked at the doctor''s door. When the door opened - Doctor : What is the matter? The man : Doctor,a dog bit my leg. Doctor : Don''t you know that I don''t see patients after 9 pm? The man : I know that very well.Perhaps the dog was not aware of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a mad scientist who worked by himself in his laboratory. He was so lonely that one day, he decided to clone himself. Everything worked perfectly, except that the clone had a very foul mouth. The scientist worked with the clone, but alas, he could not make the clone clean up his language. He got so tired of the clone''s language that one day he pushed him off the end of a cliff. A policeman rushed up to him, and yelled "You are under arrest!" "What for?" the mad scientist asked. And the policeman answered: For making an obscene clone fall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Harvard English 101 class was asked to write a CONCISE essay containing four elements: religion, royalty, sex and mystery. The only "A+" in the class read: "My God," said the Queen, "I''m pregnant. I wonder who did it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a new study out about women and how they feel about their ass. I thought the results were pretty interesting: 85% of women think their ass is too big... 10% of women think their ass is too little... The other 5% say that they don''t care -- they love him and would have married him anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two neighbors had been fighting each other for nigh on four decades. Bob buys a Great Dane and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill''s yard. For one whole year Bill ignores the dog. So Bob then buys a cow and teaches it to use the bathroom in Bill''s yard. After about a year and a half of Bob''s cow crapping in Bill''s yard; being ignored all the while, a semi pulls up in front of Bill''s house. Bob runs over and demands to know what''s in the 18-wheeler. ''My new pet elephant,'' Bill replies solemnly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cash, check or charge? I asked after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I notice a remote control for a television set in her purse. "Do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. "No," she replied. "But my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the worst thing I could do to him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Somewhere in the deep South, Bubba called an attorney and asked, "Is it true they''re suing the cigarette companies for causing people to get cancer?" "Yes, Bubba, that is true." "And people are suing the fast food restaurants for making them fat and clogging their arteries with all them burgers and fries ... is that true, mister lawyer?" "Sure is Bubba, but why do you ask?" "Cause I was thinkin'' .... maybe I can sue Budweiser for all them ugly women I''ve been wakin'' up with!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JACK AND JILL Went up the hill To have a little fun. Stupid Jill Forgot the pill And now they have a son.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB Her father shot it dead Now it goes to school with her Between two hunks of bread.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall All the king''s horses and all the king''s men Had scrambled eggs for breakfast again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE, the cat did a piddle, all over the bedside clock, The little dog laughed to see such fun then died of electric shock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie Kissed the girls and made them cry. When the boys came out to play He kissed them as well, he''s funny that way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THERE WAS A LITTLE GIRL, who had a little curl Right in the middle of her forehead... And when she was good, she was very very good, But when she was bad she got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo and a sports car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy returning home from his first day at school said to his mother, "Mom, what''s sex?" His mother, who believed in all the most modern educational theories, gave him a detailed explanation, covering all aspects of the tricky subject. When she had finished, the little lad produced an enrollment form which he had brought home from school and said, "Yes, but how am I going to get all that into this one little square?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At school, a boy was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth". The boy decides to go home and try it out. He goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him a $50 note and says, "Just don''t tell your father." Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father also promptly hands him a $50 note and says, "Please don''t say a word to your mother." Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What is the best way to get rid of Irish people? Answer: Throw a dollar off of a bridge! Question: What is the best way to get rid of more Irish people? Answer: Say that no one found the dollar yet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These two eggs had just been married and were on their honeymoon. While they were sitting on the bed making out, the female egg pushed the male egg away and said, "I just have to go to the bathroom. I''ll be back in a minute." and off she went. Five minutes later, the male egg saw his sexy wife walk out in a slinky negligee, wiping her hands up and down her smooth, oval-shaped body. Instantly, the male egg slapped his hands on the top of his head, covering it completely. The female egg looked at him and asked what he was doing. He replied, "The last time I was this hard, someone cracked me on the head with a spoon!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Taxiing down the tarmac, the 757 abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate. After an hour-long wait, it finally took off. A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, "What was the problem?" "The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine," explained the flight attendant, "and it took us a while to find a new pilot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Flight 2341, for noise abatement, turn right 45 degrees. "But Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?" "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A small boy was lost at a large shopping mall. He approached a uniformed policeman and said, "I''ve lost my grandpa!" The cop asked, "What''s he like?" The little boy replied, "Jack Daniels and women with big tits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At one time in my life, I thought I had a handle on the meaning of the word "service". The act of doing things for other people. Then I heard the terms: Internal Revenue Service, Postal Service, Civil Service, Telephone Service, Service Stations, Customer Service, City/County Public Service. And I became confused about the word "service". This is not what I thought "service" meant. Then one day, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them mentioned that he was having a bull service a few of his cows. SHAZAM! It all came into perspective. Now I understand what all those "service" agencies are doing to us...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job. 2. It is important that a man makes you laugh. 3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn''t lie to you. 4. It is important that a man is good in bed and loves making love to you. 5. It is important that these four men don''t know each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We''ve just been notified by Security that there have been six suspected terrorists working out of your office. Five of the six have been apprehended. Bin Sleepin, Bin Loafin, Bin Goofin, Bin Lunchin and Bin Drinkin have been taken into custody. Our agent advised us that they could find no one fitting the description of the sixth cell member, Bin Workin, at your office. Security is confident that anyone who looks like he''s Bin Workin will be very easy to spot. You are obviously not a suspect at this time', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads: --------------------------------------- | Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 | | Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 | | Hand Job: $10.00 | --------------------------------------- Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men. "Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile, "can I help you?" "I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?" "Yes," she purrs, "I am." The man replies "Well wash your hands, I want a cheese sandwich!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never accept a drink from a urologist, nor a friendly handshake from a proctologist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes you are the dog. Sometimes you are the hydrant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be a good housekeeper. When you leave him ... get a good lawyer ...keep his house', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. - Douglas Adams. "I''m astounded by people who want to `know'' the universe when it''s hard enough to find your way around Chinatown." - Woody Allen. "Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together...." - Carl Zwanzig. "Computer programming is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning." - Rich Cook. "The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us." - Bill Watterson (Calvin and Hobbes).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A business man was driving along when he spotted a hippie thumbing for a ride. He stopped to pick him up. The hippie sat in the front of the car, bopping and snapping his fingers to some beat in his head. The business man approached a stop sign and couldn''t see clearly to his right, so he asked the hippie if there was anything coming from the right. "Just a dog, man..just a dog" So the business man pulled out and CRASH!! A few days later the business man woke up in a hospital with his arms and legs hung in traction. He looked over and saw the hippie in the bed next to him, his arms and legs also suspended in traction - still bopping and snapping his fingers to some beat in his head. The business man asked, "Hey, I thought you said there was just a dog coming from the right!?" Said the hippie, still snapping his fingers in rhythm, "Yeah man, like Greyhound! man..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady picked up several items at a discount store. When she finally got up to the checker, she learned that one of her items had no price tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got on the intercom and boomed out for all the store to hear, "PRICE CHECK ON LANE THIRTEEN, TAMPAX SUPER SIZE." That was bad enough, but somebody at the rear of the store apparently misunderstood the word "Tampax" for "THUMBTACKS." In a business-like tone, a voice boomed back over the intercom. "DO YOU WANT THE KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH YOUR THUMB OR THE KIND YOU POUND IN WITH A HAMMER?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her, after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now", she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said, in a voice just as threatening, "If you don''t let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy''s pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me were screams of laughter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I''m just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has not let me forget.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women''s type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men''s balls."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for two days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don''t get any....a true story... We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn''t, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where''s that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can''t dear," she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy''s room." A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice, "The big sissy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three-year-old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, "Mommy, you are getting fat!" I replied, "Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy." "I know," she replied, "but what''s growing in your butt?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two kinds of pedestrians -- the quick and the dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is sexually transmitted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:How many Men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 3! 1 to actually screw in the lightbulb, the other 2 need to be there so he can brag about the screwing part!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Get the last word in: Apologize.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people are like Slinkies...not really good for anything, but you still can''t help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found inner peace........ The article read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you''ve started." So I looked around the house to see all the things I started and hadn''t finished....and before leaving the house this morning I finished off bottle of red wine, a bottle of white, the Bailey''s, Kahlua and Wild Turkey, the Prozac, some valium, some cheesecake and a box of chocolates. You have no idea how freakin good I feel....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The hypothalamus is one of the most important parts of the brain, involved in many kinds of motivation, among other functions. The hypothalamus controls the "Four F''s": fighting, fleeing, feeding, and mating. -Heard in a neuropsychology classroom', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn''t it?" "No," the second man replied, "it''s Thursday." And the third man chimed in, "So am I. Let''s have a beer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('80-year old Bessie bursts into the rec room at the retirement home. She holds her clenched fist in the air and announces, "Anyone who can guess what is in my hand can have sex with me tonight!!" An elderly gentleman in the rear shouts out, "An elephant?" Bessie thinks a minute and says, "Close enough."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary''s got this huge book, it''s a memoir of her life and times at the White House. In the book she says when Bill told her he was having an affair, she said ''I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for air.'' No, I''m sorry, that''s what Monica said. - David Letterman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Hillary Clinton''s new book ''Living History,'' Hillary details what it was like meeting Bill Clinton, falling in love with him, getting married, and living a passionate, wonderful life as husband and wife. Then on page two, the trouble starts. - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton has finished her memoirs for publication next year, while Bill has barely finished the first chapter. Well, in all fairness, Fiction is a lot harder to write. - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state of New York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family Bible. You know, the one with only seven commandments. - David Letterman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she''s strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it. - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Father O''Malley rose from his bed. It was a fine spring day in his new Washington DC parish. He walked to the window of his bedroom to get a deep breath of the beautiful day outside. He then noticed there was a jackass lying dead in the middle of his front lawn. He promptly called the US Senate for assistance. The conversation went like this: "Good morning, this is Senator Trent Lott. How might I help you?" "And the best of the day te yerself. This is Father O''Malley at St.Brigid''s. There''s a jackass lying dead in me front lawn. Would ye be so kind as to send a couple o'' yer lads to take care of the matter?" Senator Lott, considering himself to be quite a wit, replied with a smirk, "Well now, Father, it was always my impression that you people took care of last rites!" There was dead silence on the line for a long moment. Father O''Malley then replied: "Aye, that''s certainly true, but we are also obliged to notify the next of kin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall where a flower show was in progress One leaned over and said, "Life is so boring, we never have any fun anymore. For $5.00, I''d take my clothes off and streak through that stupid flower show!" "You''re on!" said the other old lady, holding up a $5.00 bill. As fast as she could, the first little old lady fumbled her way out of her clothes and, completely naked, streaked through the front door of the flower show. Waiting outside, her friend heard a huge commotion inside the hall, following by loud applause. The naked lady burst out through the door surrounded by a cheering crowd. "How did you do?" asked her waiting friend. "Great! I just won first prize as Best Dried Arrangement!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours and gets a horrible sunburn. He goes to the hospital and is promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second degree burns. He was already starting to blister and in agony. The doctor prescribed continuous intravenous feeding with saline and electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours. The nurse, rather astounded, said, "What good will Viagra do him?" The doctor replied, "It''ll keep the sheets off his legs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Six retired Floridians were playing poker in the condo clubhouse when Meyerwitz loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five continue playing standing up. Finkelstein looks around and asks, "So, who''s gonna tell the wife?" They draw straws. Goldberg picks the short one. They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, don''t make a bad situation any worse. "Discreet? I''m the most discreet man you''ll ever meet. Discretion is my middle name. Leave it to me." Goldberg goes over to the Meyerwitz apartment and knocks on the door. The wife answers and asks what he wants. Goldberg declares, "Your husband just lost $500 and is afraid to come home." The wife says, "Tell him to drop dead!" "I''ll go tell him," says Goldberg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man suffered a serious heart attack and had open heart bypass surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at a Catholic hospital. As he was recovering, a nun asked him questions regarding how he was going to pay for his medical services. He was asked if he had health insurance. He replied in a raspy voice, "No health insurance." The nun asked if he had money in the bank. He replied, "No money in the bank." The nun asked, "Do you have a relative who could help you?" He said, "I only have a spinster sister who is a nun." The nun got a little perturbed and announced loudly, "Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God." The patient replied, "Then send the bill to my brother-in-law."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary, we hear you coming." 2.Outside a hotel: "Help! We need inn-experienced people." 3.On a desk in a reception room: "We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left." 4.In a veterinarian''s waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes, Sit! Stay!" 5.At the electric company: "We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don''t you will be." 6.On the door of a computer store: "Out for a quick byte." 7.In a restaurant window: "Don''t stand there and be hungry, come on in and get fed up." 8.Inside a bowling alley: "Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop." 9.In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully, we''ll wait." 10.In a counselor''s office: "Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blond crash her helicopter? A: Because she was cold and decided to turn off the ceiling fan!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow -- even during a hurricane! -- here is a valuable tip: Your life is in trouble.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play, it is always possible to get worse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golf is a hard game to figure. One day you''ll go out and slice it and shank it, hit it onto all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out, and for no reason at all, you really stink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I play in the low 80''s. If it is hotter than that, I won''t play.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously, it won''t work -- and both are expensive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In golf, some people tend to get confused with all the numbers. They shoot a six, yell fore, and write five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A not necessarily well-prepared college student sat in his life science classroom, staring at a question on the final exam paper. The question directed "Give four advantages of breast milk." What to write?" He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best: 1. No need to boil. 2. Never goes sour. 3. Available whenever necessary. So far so good - maybe. But the exam demanded a fourth answer. Again, what to write? Once more, he sighed. He frowned. He scowled, then sighed again. Suddenly, he brightened. He grabbed his pen, and triumphantly scribbled his definitive answer. 4. Available in attractive containers of varying sizes. He received an A.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sarah''s grandson is playing in the water, while she is standing on the beach not wanting to get her feet wet, when all of a sudden a huge wave appears from nowhere and crashes directly over the spot where the boy is in the ocean. The water recedes and the boy is no longer there. He simply vanished. Sarah holds her hands to the sky and cries, "God, how could you? Have I not been a wonderful mother and grandmother? Have I not given to B''nai Brith and Haddasah? Have I not tried my very best to live a life that you would be proud of?" Just then, another huge wave appears out of nowhere and crashes on the beach. As the water recedes, the boy is standing there, smiling, splashing around as if nothing had happened. A loud voice booms from the sky, "I have returned your grandson. Are you satisfied?" Sarah responded, "Well ... He WAS wearing a hat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lena called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does it take to fly from Minneapolis to Fargo?" "Just a minute," said the busy clerk. "Vell, said Lena, "if it has to go dat fast, I tink I''ll just take da bus."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged non-support. He said to Ole, "I have decided to give your wife $400 a month for support." "Vell, dat''s fine, Judge," said Ole. "And vunce in a while I''ll try to chip in a few bucks, myself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole is so cheap that after his airplane landed safely he grumbled, "Vell, dere gose five dollars down da drain for dat flight insurance!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had a very smart dog. He tried selling it for around $45, but everybody thought it was too expensive. The man couldn''t lower the price because part of the deal was to buy it a new name tag, 5 lbs. of food, and a new toy. After long thought he decided to get rid of the dog. He drove 20 miles out of town and dropped the dog off. When he arrived home, the dog was on the porch. He was baffled by this, so he went out of town 80 miles the next day and dropped his dog off in the woods. He went home only to find his dog on the porch. Next day he was mad, so he drove 170 miles out of town taking the most complicated way possible and dropped his dog off. He started driving around trying to find his way home, but he couldn''t. He called his wife on his cell phone and asked, "Honey, is the dog home?" His wife responded, "Yes, why?" The man said, "Put him on the phone - I need directions."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is black and white and red all over? An embarrassed zebra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole and Lena got married. On their honeymoon trip they were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand and on Lena''s knee. Giggling, Lena said, "Ole, you can go a little farther now if ya vant to." So Ole drove to Duluth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole died. So Lena went to the local paper to put a notice in the obituaries. The gentleman at the counter, after offering his condolences, asked Lena what she would like to say about Ole. Lena replied, "You just put ''Ole died.'' " The gentleman, somewhat perplexed, said, "That''s it? Just ''Ole died?'' Surely, there must be something more you''d like to say about Ole. If it''s money you''re concerned about, the first five words are free. We must say something more." So Lena pondered for a few minutes! and finally said, "O.K. You put ''Ole died. Boat for sale.'' "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole and Lars were on their very first train ride. They had brought along bananas for lunch. Just as they began to peel them, the train entered a long, dark tunnel. "Have you eaten your banana yet?" Ole asked excitedly "No," replied Lars. "Vell, don''t touch it den," Ole exclaimed. "I yust took vun bite and vent blind!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole bought Lena a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, Lars inquired how she was doing with it. "Oh," said Ole, "I persuaded her to svitch to a clarinet." "How come?" asked Lars "Vell," Ole answered, "because vith a clarinet she can''t sing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole and Lena went to the Olympics. While sitting on a bench a lady turned to Ole and said, "Are you a pole vaulter?" Ole said, "No, I''m Norvegian...and my name isn''t Valter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch. One lady turns and asks, "Do you still get frisky?" The other replies, "Oh, sure I do." The first woman asks, "What do you do about it?" The second old lady replies, "I suck a lifesaver." After a few moments, the first old lady asks, "Who drives you to the beach?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Do you know why doctors slap babies on the butt after they are born? A: It knocks the penises off of the dumb ones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people say that I''m superficial, but that''s just on the surface.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can''t even get into my own pants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you''re in bed with a relative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "Implants?" She hit me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t do drugs. I get the same effect just standing up fast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign in a Chinese Pet Store: "Buy one dog, get one flea..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I live in my own little world. But it''s OK. They know me here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t approve of political jokes. I''ve seen too many of them get elected.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and shithead''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love being married. It''s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I''ve stayed alive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Isn''t having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that most nudists are people you don''t want to see naked?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom''s wise words: "Don''t pick that up, you don''t know where it''s been!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today is International Day of The Very Good Looking, Beautiful and Damn Attractive People, so send this message to someone you think fits this description. Please do not send it back to me as I have already received over one thousand messages and my inbox is jammed full.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not only am I redundant and superfluous, but I also tend to use more words than necessary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is full of uncertainties...or could I be wrong about that?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of weeks ago the clouds over western Washington were moving to the west. Normally they head east, inland over the mountains to central Washington and beyond. Scientists blamed the switch on mad cloud disease.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn...that was fun!"??', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery. A pessimist''s blood type is always b-negative. Practice safe eating - always use condiments. A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother. Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death. I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded. If electricity comes from electrons... does that mean that morality comes from morons? Marriage is the mourning after the knot before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hangover is the wrath of grapes. Corduroy pillows are making headlines. Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome? Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play. Banning the bra was a big flop. Sea captains don''t like crew cuts. Does the name Pavlov ring a bell? A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor. Without geometry, life is pointless. When you dream in color, it''s a pigment of your imagination. Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion. Reading whilst sunbathing makes you well-red. When two egotists meet, it''s an I for an I. Alarms: What an octopus is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Crick: The sound that a Japanese camera makes. Dockyard: A physician''s garden. Incongruous: Where bills are passed. Khakis: What you need to start the car in Boston. Oboe: An English tramp. Pasteurize: Too far to see. Propaganda: A gentlemanly goose. Toboggan: Why we go to an auction', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar. He sees a good looking, smartly dressed woman perched on a bar stool. He walks up behind her and says, "Hi there, good looking, how''s it going?" Having already had a few power drinks, she turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says, ''Listen! I''ll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place, front door, back door, it doesn''t matter. I''ve been doing it ever since I got out of college. I just flat ass love it." Eyes now wide with interest he says, "No kidding, I''m a lawyer too! What firm are you with?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesse Jackson, Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It''s called "Ministers Do More Than Lay People."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are only eleven times in history where the "F" word has been considered acceptable for use. They are as follows: 11. "What the fuck do you mean we are sinking?" Capt. E.J. Smith of RMS Titanic, 1912 10. "What the fuck was that?" Mayor Of Hiroshima, 1945 9. "Where did all those fucking Indians come from?" Custer, 1877 8 "Any fucking idiot could understand that." Einstein, 1938 7. "It does so fucking look like her!" Picasso, 1926 6. "How the fuck did you work that out?" Pythagoras, 126 BC 5. "You want WHAT on the fucking ceiling?" Michelangelo, 1566 4. "Where the fuck are we?" Amelia Earhart, 1937 3. "Scattered fucking showers, my ass!" Noah, 4314 BC 2. "Aw c''mon. Who the fuck is going to find out?" Bill Clinton, 1999 and a drum roll............!!!! 1. "Geez, I didn''t think they''d get this fucking mad." Sadaam Hussein, 2003', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bicycle can''t stand alone because it is two tired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the definition of a will? (It''s a dead giveaway).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A backward poet writes inverse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you don''t pay your exorcist you get repossessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not to worry: the man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The difference between the Pope and your boss.... The Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it is gone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you''re in the bathroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course there''s shipping and handling, too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My next house will have no kitchen -- just vending machines and a large trash can.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette said, "I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off. I was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn signal fluid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so depressed. My doctor refused to write me a prescription for Viagra. He said it would be like putting a new flagpole on a condemned building.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the drink spilled and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who had been shipwrecked on a desert island for several years is starting to feel the effects of being starved of sex for so long. However, the only living creatures on the island are a dog and a pig. One day, the man decides he''s had enough and thinks to himself that it has to be the pig. But every time he approaches the sow for his moment of passion the dog bites the man''s backside. This continues for several days and the man is beginning to get frustrated. But one morning, the man''s luck changes: out to sea he notices a beautiful young woman on the point of drowning. He swims over, drags her out on to the beach and gives her the kiss of life. The woman comes to and is very grateful. "Thank you so much," she says. "I will do anything for you, and I mean absolutely anything." The man can''t believe his luck and quickly replies, "You wouldn''t mind taking that bloody dog for a walk would you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk goes to the doctor complaining of tiredness and headaches. ''I feel tired all the time,'' he slurs, ''My head hurts, I''ve got a sore bum, and I''m not sleeping. What is it doc?'' Frowning the doctor examines him thoroughly before standing back. ''I can''t find anything wrong,'' he says.''It must be the drinking.'' ''Fair enough,'' replies the drunk.''I''ll come back when you''re sober.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My neighbor was bit by a stray rabid dog. I went to see how he was and found him writing frantically on a piece of paper. I told him rabies could be cured and he didn''t have to worry about a will. He said, "Will? What will? I''m making a list of the people I want to bite."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Definition of a teenager? God''s punishment for enjoying sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As we slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Progress in airline flying; Now a flight attendant can get a pilot pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I remember when sex was safe and flying was dangerous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The three best things in life are a good landing, a good orgasm, and a good bowel movement. The night carrier landing is one of the few opportunities in life where you get to experience all three at the same time. (Author unknown, but someone who''s been there)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; if ATC screws up, the pilot dies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over, the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying, "A dollar per point." The next class the professor handed the tests back out. This student got back his test and $56 change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I''m wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can''t read, I can''t write - and they won''t let me talk!" -------------------- On the way home from the first day of school, the father asked his son, "What did you do at school today?" The little boy shrugged his shoulders and said, "Nothing". Hoping to draw his son into conversation, the father persisted and said, "Well, did you learn about any numbers, study certain letters, or maybe a particular color?" The perplexed child looked at his father and said, "Daddy, didn''t you go to school when you were a little boy?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. The neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged at this that she came over and shouted at me, "You should be hung." I took a drink from my can of Budweiser, wiped the cold foam from my lips, lifted my darkened Ray ban Sunglasses and stared directly at this nosey neighbor and then calmly replied, "I am, that''s why she cuts the grass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man, let''s call him Gregory. Gregory was carrying a small box, and he went to another man''s house (we''ll call him Jebediah) and knocked on the door. When Jebediah answered, Gregory said "I have a proposition for you. Take this box. There is a button inside. If you press the button before I return, someone that you don''t know will die. Tomorrow, I will return. If you have pressed the button, I will give you $20,000." Gregory left the box with Jebediah. Jebediah had to consider what he was going to do. Eventually he decided that he didn''t care about the person, and he pressed the button. The next day, Gregory returned to take back the box. "Well then, I belive that this is yours," he said, giving $20,000 to Jebediah. "Thank you," Jebediah said. "By the way, I''m just curious: What are you going to do with the box now?" "I''m going to give it to someone that doesn''t know you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old farmer in Georgia had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, basketball court, etc. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn''t been there for a while, and look it over. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end of the pond. One of the women shouted to him, "We''re not coming out until you leave!" The old man replied, "I didn''t come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked." "I''m here to feed the alligator." Moral: Old age and cunning will triumph over youth and enthusiasm every time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You certainly look cool. "Thanks, you don''t look so hot yourself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never hold your farts in. They travel up your spine, into your brain, and that''s where you get shitty ideas from.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl''s legs are her best friends, but the best of friends must part. -- Redd Foxx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Pakistani guy named Abdul was ringing in flour at his grocery store, and the bag broke, covering him with flour. Abdul rushes home to take a shower. He enters his house and his wife says to him, "Abdul, you''re white, what happened to you?" Abdul says "I was ringing in flour, the bag broke, I go take shower." He runs upstairs and he runs into his son. His son says "Daddy, you''re a white man, what happened?" Abdul said "I was ringing in flour, the bag broke, I go take shower." He proceeds towards the bathroom when he is stopped by his daughter. His daughter said "Daddy, you''re all white, what happened?" He screams "I''ve only been white for half an hour, and already I hate you damn pakies!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny was walking down the street pulling his wagon when he stubbed his toe. He was swearing like crazy when a priest comes up to him and says "Johnny, I wouldn''t say such things, God is everywhere." Intrigued by the priest''s comment, he questions the priest. "Is God over there?" he says pointing to a tree. "Yes Johnny, God is over there by that tree!" says the priest. "Is god right here?" Johnny said pointing right beside him. "Yes Johnny God is right beside you." says the priest. "Is God in my red wagon?" asks Johnny. "Yes Johnny, God is in your red wagon." says the priest. "Is god in my basement?" asks Johnny. "Yes Johnny, God is in your basement." says the priest. Johnny screams "You''re a liar, I don''t have a basement!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My karma ran over my dogma. -Anonymous', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion? A piece of ass that brings tears to your eyes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bin Laden is sitting with his son and they are watching the Twin Towers collapse. His son asks him, "Dad, which film is this?" to which he replied, "Son, this isn''t a film, this is a series."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a blonde keep lowering her head in the supermarket? She is looking for low prices.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde have on her when she is naked? A working uniform.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How would you drown a blond? Put a mirror at the bottom of the swimming pool', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a blond turn the light on after sex? ANSWER: She opens the car door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does the blond take off the doors from the bathroom when she is having a wash? ANSWER: So no one would look through the keyhole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it good to have a blond in your car? ANSWER: You can park on places for disabled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a blonde and an ironing board? It''s easier to open the legs on the blonde.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blond say when she is watching a porn movie? ANSWER: "Look, me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Driving to Louisana on the interstate, I looked over to my left and there was a woman in a brand new Cadillac doing 65 mph with her face up next to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner. I looked away for a couple seconds and when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane, still working on that makeup. As a man, I don''t scare easily. But she scared me so much; I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the donut out of my other hand. In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my cell phone away from my ear which fell into the coffee between my legs, splashed, and burned Big Jim and the Twins, ruined the damn phone, soaked my trousers, and disconnected an important call. Darn women drivers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I''d like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic. If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire. "If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port wing has fallen off. "If you look down towards the Atlantic ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you. "That''s me your captain, the co-pilot, and one of the air stewardesses. This is a recorded message. Have a good flight!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a blond stand next to a mirror with her hands on her eyes? She wants to see how she looks like when she is sleeping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a tortoise? A: The blond is better on her back than the tortoise.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is passing a blonde and he says, "Where are those legs going?" and the blonde answers, "They are going home for now unless something comes between them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 blondes caught a goldfish, and the fish said if they let her go she will grant them one wish each. The first blonde said: "I want to be smart." The second said: "I want to be smarter than her," and the third said: "I want to be the smartest." In the morning they woke up and the first blonde turned into a brunette, second black and the third one had become a man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the blonde that started writing a diary of all her thoughts? Yes, after 3 years she is on the second page now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady walks into a drug store and tells the pharmacist she needs some cyanide. The pharmacist said, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady explained she needed it to poison her husband. The pharmacist''s eyes got big and he said, "Lord have mercy, I can''t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That''s against the law! They''ll throw both of us in jail and I''ll lose my license." Then the lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist''s wife and handed it to the pharmacist. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now, you didn''t tell me you had a prescription."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('James came to school late. TEACHER: James, why are you late? JAMES: I had to take the cow to the bull to mate. TEACHER: Couldn''t your father do that? JAMES: No, I think it''s better for the bull to do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The journey of a thousand miles ... begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sex is like air. It''s not important... unless you aren''t getting any.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never test the depth of the water with both feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again... It was probably worth it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy Joe Bob, while not a brilliant scholar, was a gifted portrait artist. His fame grew and soon people from all over the country were coming to him for paintings. One day, a beautiful young woman pulled up to his house in a stretch limo. She asked Billy Joe Bob if he would paint her in the nude. This was the first time anyone had made this request. The beautiful lady said money was no object; she was willing to pay $50,000. Not wanting to get into trouble with his wife, Billy Joe Bob asked the lady to wait while he went in the house and conferred with his wife. In a few minutes, he returned and told the lady he was willing to do it. However, he would have to leave his socks on so he would have some place to wipe his brushes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some days you are the bug. Some days you are the windshield.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t worry; it only seems kinky the first time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Generally speaking, you aren''t learning much when your lips are moving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our ass... then things get worse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone seems normal until you get to know them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four girls were playing a game of tag. All of them had really long names that were hard to say, so one person thought of the idea of giving themselves nicknames. One suggested thinking of funny names, so the really tall girl was named ''Shorty''. The really thin girl was named ''fatty''. The next girl was very ''girlish'', so they named her ''tomboy''. The last girl was the hardest to pick a name for, because she was not tall or short, fat or thin, a girly girl or a tomboy. Finally it came to them. Now there is Shorty, Fatty, Tomboy, and Smarty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Roses are yellow; Grandfather''s teeth Are lost in the Jello.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You don''t have any luck at all if: -The guarantee on your used car expires two hours before the car''s engine does. - You start to go bald at the same time you reach puberty. -You get your BIG break and make the football team only to trip over the bench and break your leg. -You find a ten-dollar bill and get arrested when you try to spend it because it''s counterfeit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waitress: "Would you like your coffee black?" Customer: "What other colors do you have?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tex: "My uncle can shoot a gun faster than any other man in the West. He can even shoot without removing the gun from his Holster." Rex: "What do they call your uncle?" Tex: "Toeless Joe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sheriff of a small western town was also the town veterinarian. Late one night the phone rang, and his wife answered it. "Is your husband there?" asked an agitated voice. "Do you require my husband''s services as a sheriff or as a veterinarian?" She asked. "Both," came the reply. "We can''t get our dog''s mouth open, and there''s a burglar in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam: "Where have I seen your face before?" Pam: "Right where it is now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: "Stop worrying so much. Forget your troubles. Throw yourself into your work." Patient: "But, Doc, I mix paint for a living!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As I was packing for my business trip, my 3-year old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point, she said, "Daddy, look at this," and stuck out two of her fingers. Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingers in my mouth and said, "Daddy''s gonna eat your fingers!" pretending to eat them before I rushed out of the room again. When I returned, my daughter was standing on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face. I said, "What''s wrong, honey?" She replied, "What happened to my booger?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a man Love, To forgive him and Patience, For his moods Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength I''ll just beat him to death', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A small boy stunned his parents after Sunday School when he began to empty his pockets of nickels, dimes and quarters. Finally his mother asked the obvious question, "Where did you get all that money?" "At church," the boy replied nonchalantly. "They have bowls of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I feel so miserable without you, it''s almost like having you here. -Stephen Bishop "I''ve just learned about his illness. Let''s hope it''s nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway) "He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others." -Samuel Johnson "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr "I''ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn''t it." -Groucho Marx "I didn''t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go." -Oscar Wilde "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -Oscar Wilde "He has Van Gogh''s ear for music." - Billy Wilder', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you keep reading the Bible every day? the teenage girl asked her grandfather. "Well, it''s a bit like cramming for your final exam," said Granddad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. There''s potpourri hanging from his/her collar. 9. The dog''s nails have been cut with pinking shears. 8. The dog toys are all stored in McCoy crocks. 7. The pooper scooper has been decorated with raffia bows. 6. That telltale lemon slice in the new silver water bowl. 5. You find liver and whole wheat dog treats stamped out with copper cookie cutters and decorated with royal icing using a #2 rosette tip. 4. Dog hair has been collected and put into wire baskets for nesting material for the birds. 3. A seasonally appropriate grapevine wreath adorns the front of your dog''s crate. 2. Your dog goes outside naked and comes in wearing a thyme colored virgin wool hand-knitted sweater with matching boots. 1. The dog droppings in your backyard have been sculpted into swans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The owner of a golf course in Knoxville, Tennessee was confused about paying an invoice minus his early payment discount, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the University of Tennessee and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" The secretary thought a moment, then replied, "Everything but my earrings."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl was visiting her blonde friend who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend asked, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?" "HellOOOooo," answered the blonde. "They''re watch dogs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00. With Enron, you would have $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00. With WorldCom, you would have less than $5.00 left. But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of Beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling price, you would have $214.00. Based on the above, current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle. It''s called the 401-Keg Plan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-During a thunderstorm, you build a giant boat and start stealing your neighbor''s pets. -When the boss criticizes your work, you hack off your right ear and mail it to him. -Not only do you consider Yoko an artistic genius, you think she''s beautiful and h', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lorena Bobbitt''s sister Louella was arrested yesterday for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago. Sources reveal the sister was not as accurate as Lorena. She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper thigh causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to be in serious, but stable condition and Louella has been charged with a.... Misdewiener', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Hindu swamis were in conversation. One said to the other, "How did you like my latest book, ''The Art of Levitation''?" His companion replied, "It kept me up all night."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Hindu devotee asked God, represented by the multi-armed Lord Narayana, this question. "My dear Lord," he said. "I understand that you have innumerable inconceivable potencies, but out of all of them the energy of light seems to be the most amazing. Light pervades the spiritual world, it illuminates the material universes, and life is impossible without it." He continued, "I would like to know how you make it work." "Oh, that''s easy," was the reply. "Many hands make light work."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Carol''s husband, Arnie, was a male chauvinist. Even though they both worked full-time, he never helped around the house. Housework was a woman''s work! One evening Carol arrived home from work to find the children bathed, one load of clothes in the washer and another in the dryer, dinner on the stove, and the table set. She was astonished. It turns out that Arnie had read an article that said wives who worked full-time and had to do their own housework were too tired to have sex. The night went well and the next day she told her office friends all about it. "We had a great dinner. Arnie even cleaned up. He helped the kids do their homework, folded all the laundry and put everything away. I really enjoyed the evening." "But what about afterward?" asked her friends. "Oh, that was perfect too. Arnie was too tired!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reporters interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply replied, "No peer pressure."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve sure gotten old. I''ve had 2 By-pass surgeries. A hip replacement, new knees. Fought prostate cancer, and diabetes. I''m half blind, can''t hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation, hardly feel my hands and feet anymore Can''t remember if I''m 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But...Thank God, I still have my Florida driver''s license!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 97 year old man goes into his doctor''s office and says, "Doc, I want my sex drive lowered." "Sir", replied the doctor, "You''re 97. Don''t you think your sex drive is all in your head?" "You''re damned right it is!" replied the old man. "That''s why I want it lowered!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman from Brooklyn decided to prepare her will and make her final requests. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Bloomingdales. "Bloomingdales!" the rabbi exclaimed. "Why Bloomingdales?" "Then I''ll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Respect leadership hierarchy wisely A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I''ll give each of you just one." "Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speed boat, without a care in the world." Poof! She''s gone. In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of pina coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He''s gone. "OK, you''re up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch." Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new army recruit was given guard duty at 2 a.m. He did his best for a while, but at about 4 a.m. he went to sleep. He awakened to find the officer of the day standing before him. Remembering the heavy penalty for being asleep on guard duty, this smart young man kept his head bowed for another moment and looked upward and reverently said, "A-a-a-men!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer had been taken several times by a local car dealer. One day, the car dealer informed the farmer that he was coming over to purchase a cow. The farmer priced the unit as follows: Basic Cow $ 999.95 Shipping and Handling 35.75 Extra Stomach 79.25 Two-tone Exterior 142.10 Produce Storage Compartment 128.50 Heavy Duty Straw Chopper 189.60 4-Spigot/High Output Drain System 149.20 Automatic Fly Swatter 88.50 Genuine Cowhide Upholstery 170.80 Deluxe Dual Horns 59.25 Automatic Fertilizer Attachment 339.40 4 X 4 Traction Drive Assembly 884.16 Pre-Delivery Wash and Comb 69.80 Farmer Suggested List Price $ 3336.26 Additional Dealer Adjustment 300.00 Total list price (including options) $ 3636.26 Tax and Ear Tags 418.00 TOTAL PURCHASE PRICE $ 4054.26', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s no use. Art doesn''t listen to me, said a little boy who was praying for a new bike. "Art who?" asked the boy''s mother. "Art in heaven," came the reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy on a date parks and gets the girl in the back seat and they make love. The girl wants it again and the guy obliges her. She wants more and they do it again. She still wants more and the guy says "Excuse me a minute I have to relieve myself." While out of the car he notices a guy a half block away changing a flat. He asks the guy "Look, I''ve got this gal in my car and I''ve given it to her four or five times and she still wants more. I''ll change your flat if you''ll take over for me." The guy does and is just getting in the high numbers when a cop knocks on the window and shines a light on them. The cop asks "What''re you doing in there?" The guy says "I''m making love to my wife." The cop asks "Why don''t you do that at home?" The guy answers "To tell you the truth, I didn''t know it was my wife until you shone the light on her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do babies get their belly buttons? A: When God finishes making little babies, He lines them all up in a row, then he walks along in front of them. He pokes each one in the tummy with His finger and says, "You''re done, you''re done, you''re done, - - -"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, after I took my dog to the vet, I stopped off at the grocery store to pick up some milk. So I left my dog in the car with the window rolled down so she could breathe. Because my dog is small, she could fit through the window of the car, but she is well trained enough to follow my commands. So I told her, "Stay. Stay there, don''t move. Staaay." A man loading his car with groceries next to me said, "You know, usually, I just put it in park!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Practice safe eating ...Always use condiments.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when you hear Vrrrrm.ERT.Vrmmm.Ert? Answer: A Blond at A Blinking Red Light.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard you got a baby. Dad: Yes, and I am very happy. So what about the wife? Dad: She still doesn''t know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beauty is only a light switch away', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let''s all get wasted together, and have the time of our lives!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Make love, not war. Hell, do both GET MARRIED!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Woman''s Rule of Thumb: If it has, tires, or testicles, you''re going to have trouble with it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this huge guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says, "7 feet tall, 350 lbs., 20 inch penis, testicles 3 lbs. each, Turner Brown." The small guy just faints dead away and falls to the floor. The big dude kneels down and brings him to, by slapping and shaking him. He asks, "Are you Ok?" In a very weak voice the little guy says, "Excuse me, but what did you just say to me?" The big dude says, "When I saw the curious look on your face, I just figured I''d give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. "I''m 7 feet tall, weigh 350 lbs., have a 20 inch penis, my testicles weigh 3 lbs. each. And my name is Turner Brown." The small guy says, "Thank God!! I thought you said Turn Around".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU''RE DRUNK: Indubitably Innovative Preliminary Proliferation Cinnamon THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU''RE DRUNK: Specificity British Constitution Passive-aggressive disorder Loquacious Tran-substantiate THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU''RE DRUNK: Thanks, but I don''t want to have sex. Nope, no more booze for me. Sorry, but you''re not really my type. Good evening officer isn''t it lovely out tonight. Oh, I just couldn''t. No one wants to hear me sing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This blonde goes into a restaurant and notices there''s a "peel and win" sticker on her coffee cup. So, she peels it off and starts screaming, "I''ve won a motor home! I''ve won a motor home!" The waitress says, "That''s impossible. The biggest prize is a mini-van." But the blonde keeps screaming, "I''ve won a motor home! I''ve won a motor home." Finally, the manager comes over and says, "Ma''am, I''m sorry, but you''re mistaken. You couldn''t possibly have won a motor home, because we didn''t have that as a prize!" The blonde says, "No, it''s not a mistake. I''ve won a motor home!" So, she hands the ticket to the manager and he reads, "WIN A BAGEL".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a non-churchgoer? A: A Seventh-Day Absentist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young clergyman, fresh out of seminary, thought it would help him better understand the fears and temptations his future congregations faced if he first took a job as a policeman for several months. He passed the physical examination; then came the oral exam to test his ability to act quickly and wisely in an emergency. Among other questions he was asked, "What would you do to disperse a frenzied crowd?" He thought for a moment and then said, "I would take up a collection."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy and a girl were in a golf cart and the guy drops his tees out of his pocket and the lady asks what is he doing? So, the guy says: I put my balls on them and I drive them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just in case you''ve had a rough day at work, here''s a technique recommended in all the latest psychological texts. 1. Picture yourself near a stream. 2. Birds are softly chirping in the cool mountain air. 3. No one but you knows your secret place. 4. You are in total seclusion from the hectic place called "the world." 5. The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity. 6. The water is crystal clear. 7. You can easily make out the face of the person you''re holding underwater...your boss...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After many years, a young Jewish Talmud student who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family. "But--where is your beard?" asks his mother upon seeing him. "Mama," he replies, "in America, nobody wears a beard." "But at least you keep the Sabbath?" "Mama, business is business. In America, everybody works on the Sabbath." "But kosher food you still eat?" "Mama, in America, it is very difficult to keep kosher." The old lady ponders this information and then leans over and whispers in his ear, "Isaac, tell me--you''re still circumcised?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other, outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?" The second kid says, "I''m in here to get my tonsils out and I''m a little nervous." The first kid says, "You''ve got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jello and ice cream. It''s a breeze." The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?" The first kid says, "A circumcision." The second kid replies, "Whoa, Good luck buddy, I had that done when I was born. Couldn''t walk for a year!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only thing the Internal Revenue Service has not yet taxed is the penis. This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemployed. 30% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off, and 10% of the time it''s in the hole. It has two dependents, but they''re nuts! Effective January 2004, penises will be taxed according to size. The tax brackets are as follows: 10"-12" LUXURY TAX 8"-10" POLE TAX 5"-8" PRIVILEGE TAX 4"-5" NUISANCE TAX Males exceeding 12 inches must file under capital gains. Anyone under 4 inches is eligible for a refund. PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cheerleaders does it take to screw in a light bulb? They wouldn''t, they might brake a nail!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Milby''s. The passenger, Bubba, said, "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it''s a po-lice roadblock! We''re gonna get busted fer drinkin'' these here beers!!" "Don''t worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We''ll just pull over and finish drinkin'' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat." "What fer?" asked Bubba. "Just let me do the talkin'', OK?" said Earl. Well, they finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat and each put a label on their forehead. When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin''?" "No sir," Earl said. "We''re on the patch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mothers of teens know why animals eat their young.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We child-proofed our home 3 years ago but they''re still getting in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The main purpose of holding children''s parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who eats cereal and plays golf? Tony the Tiger Woods.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it hard for dalmatians to play hide-and-seek? Because they''re always spotted!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you aim a nuclear weapon at a disobedient country? South Korean Barbecue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a holy man that fries potatoes? A chipmonk', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is out playing golf one day when he whacks the ball harder then usual. It goes soaring in the air, and the golfer yells, "FORE!" He runs over to find his ball, and he sees a guy holding his head in pain. The man is shouting "I will sue you, and I will win 1 thousand dollars!" The golfer replies "But I yelled ''fore,'' so you can''t sue me." The man replies: "Four, thats better than just one! I''ll take it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doc, I can''t stop singing ''The Green, Green Grass of Home.'' "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" "It''s Not Unusual."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 bucks that he couldn''t reach the meat off the top shelf. "No," he said, "the steaks are too high."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? Sanka.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their car which said: "Two Prostitutes -- $50.00." A policeman, seeing the sign, stopped them and told them they''d either have to remove the sign or go to jail. Just at that time, another car passed with a sign saying: "JESUS SAVES." One of the girls asked the officer, "How come you don''t stop them?!" "Well, that''s a little different," the officer smiled . . . "Their sign pertains to religion." So the two ladies of the night frowned as they took their sign down and drove off. The following day found the same police officer in the area when he noticed the two ladies driving around with a large sign on their car again. Figuring he had an easy arrest, he began to catch up with them when he noticed the new sign which now read: "Two Fallen Angels Seeking Peter -- $50.00."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John: I got this great new hearing aid the other day. Mary: Are you wearing it now? John: Yup. Cost me four thousand dollars, though. But it''s top of the line. Mary: What kind is it? John: Twelve-thirty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid, that you called my house and asked for my number!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jacob, a three year old boy, is excited about the birth of his little sister, Olivia. One morning, Jacob''s mom is giving Olivia a bath, when Jacob asks "Mom, where''s her pp?" The mom explains that boys have pp''s and girls don''t. Just to make sure he understands, she brings out a magazine, and points to a girl and said "What does she have?" and he responds "No pp." She tells him good job and points to a man and he responds "pp." Then she points to George W. Bush and asks "Whats this?" he responds "tough call"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day I asked my grandfather how to ice fish. He said all you need is a can of peas and a club. "Huh?", I said. "How does that work?" "Well," he said, "After you cut the hole in the ice you just place the peas around the edge of the hole! Then you wait by the hole with your club." "What does that do?" I asked. "Well," he said with a grin. "When the fish come up to take a pee, you hit him over the head with the club!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two doctors and an HMO manager died and lined up at the pearly gates for admission to heaven. St. Peter asked them to identify themselves. One doctor stepped forward and said, "I was a pediatric spine surgeon and helped kids overcome their deformities." St. Peter said, "You can enter." The second doctor said, "I was a psychiatrist. I helped people rehabilitate themselves." St. Peter also invited him in. The third applicant stepped forward and said, "I was an HMO manager. I helped people get cost-effective health care." St. Peter said, "You can come in, too." But as the HMO manager walked by, St. Peter added, "You can stay three days. After that, you can go to Hell."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For all of us who miss those great old tunes from the 60s and 70s, there''s good news! Some of our old favorites have re-released their great hits with new lyrics to accommodate maturing audiences. Bobby Darin - "Splish, Splash, I Was Havin'' a Flash" Herman''s Hermits - "Mrs. Brown, You''ve Got a Lovely Walker" The Beatles - "I Get by with a Little Help from Depends" Marvin Gaye - "I Heard It Through the Grape Nuts" The Bee Gees - "How Can You Mend a Broken Hip" The Temptations - "Papa''s Got a Kidney Stone" Nancy Sinatra - "These Boots Aren''t Made for Bunions" Paul Simon - "Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver" Roberta Flack - "The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face" ABBA - "Denture Queen" Leo Sayer - "You Make Me Feel Like Napping" Commodores - "Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom" Johnny Nash - "I Can''t See Clearly Now"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the best thing about dating a homeless woman? You can drop her off anywhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should a woman say to a man she''s just had sex with? Whatever she wants. He''s sleeping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Mobile, Alabama to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Redneck says, "I want my $20 million." The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn''t work that way. We give you a million today and then you''ll get the rest spread out for the next 19 years." The Redneck said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it." Again, the man explain that he would only get a million that day and the rest during the next 19 years. The Redneck, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you''re not going to give me my $20 million right now, then I want my dollar back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Welcome aboard Southwest Flight 245 to Tampa. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don''t know how to operate one, you probably shouldn''t be out in public unsupervised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a teacher at an elementary school asks one of her students how clouds form. She replied "I''m not sure how clouds form, but the clouds know how to form, and that''s the important thing...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy asked his mother, "Ma, is it true that people can be taken apart like machines?" "Of course not, where did you hear such nonsense?" replied his mother. The young boy answered, "The other day, Daddy was talking to someone on the phone, and he said that he''d like to screw the tail off his secretary."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with B, has 2 E''s, and ends in R???? Birthday Cheer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man jumps out of an airplane with a parachute on his back. As he''s falling, he realizes his chute is broken. He doesn''t know anything about parachutes, but as the earth rapidly approaches, he realizes his options are limited; he takes off the parachute and tries to fix it himself on the way down. The wind is ripping past his face, he''s dropping like a rock, and at 5000 feet, another man goes shooting up past him. In desperation, the man with the chute looks up and yells, "Hey do you know anything about parachutes?!" The guy flying up looks down and yells, "No, do you know anything about gas stoves?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bottle feeding: An opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 am too. Defense: What you''d better have around de yard if you''re going to let the children play outside. Drooling: How teething babies wash their chins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Interchangeable parts aren''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The one item you need is always in short supply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To show the armadillo that it was possible. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from Colonel Sanders! Why did the chicken cross the road twice? Because it was a double-crosser. Why did the Iraqi chicken cross the road? To take over the other side. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide. Why did the chicken cross the beach? To get to the other tide. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Chickens hadn''t evolved yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. When no one else is looking, you swear that the monkeys are mocking you. 2. The bears'' exhibit is nothing more than the guys cut from the football team during training camp. 3. The stripes on the zebra tend to peel away in the heat. 4. The zookeeper always wants to take the rhino for a walk. 5. The lion in the lion cage closely resembles the one from The Lion King. 6. The alligator in the reptiles exhibit is nothing more than the University of Florida''s mascot. 7. If you deposit 50 cents, the giraffe will magically appear and talk to you. 8. Ask the tour guide too many questions and you''re suddenly dipped in some sort of sauce and placed in the tigers'' den. 9. The elephant appear to be two guys in a two part elephant suit. 10. Two words: hippo dogs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. It''s not a laugh to practice barking at 3a.m. 2. It''s wrong to back Grandma into a corner and guard her. 3. He shouldn''t jump on your bed when he''s sopping wet. 4. The cats have every right to be in the living room. 5. Barking at guests 10 minutes after they arrive is stupid 6. Getting up does NOT mean we are going for a walk 7. Just because I''m eating, doesn''t mean you can. 8. If you look at me with those big soppy eyes, I''m not going to give in and feed you. NOT NOT NOT. Oh, ok, just this once. 9. No, it''s my food....Oh alright then, just a small piece.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know this isn''t too funny, but it''s one of those simple ones that put a smile on your face. Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo? A: Holes all over Australia. Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale? A: A submarine with a built-in snorkel. Q: Why did the elephant cross the road? A: Chicken''s day off. Q: Why do elephants have trunks? A: Because they would look silly with glove compartments. Q: Why do elephants drink so much? A: To try to forget. Q: How can you tell if an elephant is getting ready to charge? A: He pulls out his Diners'' Club card. Q: What do you get when two giraffes collide? A: A giraffic jam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sherlock Holmes stood at the Gates of Heaven pulling at his pipe awaiting his turn. "I''ll let you in," said St. Peter, gesturing toward the heavenly throngs behind him, "if you''ll tell me who among these was the first mortal." "Elementary, my dear St. Peter," said the great detective, "he''s the one without a bellybutton."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez. "How was he killed?" asked one detective. "With a golf gun." answered the other detective. "A golf gun?! What is a golf gun?" asked the first detective. "I don''t know, but it sure made a hole in Juan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A faith healer asked Moshe how his family was getting along. "They''re all fine," Moshe said, "Except my uncle. He''s very sick." "Your uncle is not sick," the faith healer said. "He THINKS he''s sick." Two weeks later, the faith healer ran into Moshe on the street. "How is your uncle getting along?" he asked. Moshe shrugged, "He THINKS he''s dead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Jesus was out for a walk, strolling near the walls surrounding heaven, when he heard an old man''s voice call from the other side. "Hello? Hello?" Jesus replied, "Who is it?" "Just a poor, old carpenter searching for his son," the old man replied. Jesus'' heart leapt with joy and he called out, "Joseph?" The voice answered back, "Pinocchio?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Very stinky I can be. And a wet hole is all you see. Give me a rod and I''m happy. In the silence I can queef. No one thinks they''re eating beef. And please oh please don''t use teeth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A silent Order of Monks is allowed to eat only porridge and speak just once a month. One month, Friar Albert stood up and said, "I hate porridge." A month of silence passes by and Friar Barnaby stands to say, "I like porridge." Another silent month goes by when Head Master Geoff rises and says... "Would you two stop this constant bickering!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three ministers are talking over lunch and before long find themselves discussing how much of the weekly offering is appropriate to keep and how much to give to the Lord. The first minister says, "I just draw a line on the floor, put one foot on each side, and throw the money into the air. Whatever lands on the right side of the line is God''s and whatever lands on the left is mine." The second minister notes that he uses a similar method, but "I use a small coffee table when I throw the money in the air and whatever lands on the table goes to the Lord and whatever lands on the floor is mine." They both contemplate each other''s answer and finally turn to the third minister who is sitting there without saying anything. "Well, how do you do it?" asks the first to the third. "Well, I do as you both do and throw the money into the air, but I figure whatever the Lord wants, he''ll grab, and I keep whatever hits the floor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Give Evolution Two Opposable Thumbs Up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#10 - You can trade an old 44 for a new 22. #9 - You can keep one handgun at home and have another for one when you''re on the road. #8 - If you admire a friends handgun and tell him so, he''ll probably let you try it out a few times. #7 - Your primary handgun doesn''t mind if you keep another handgun for backup. #6 - Your handgun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo. #5 - A handgun doesn''t take up a lot of closet space. #4 - Handguns function normally every day of the month. #3 - A handgun doesn''t ask, "Do these new grips make me look fat?" #2 - A handgun doesn''t mind if you go to sleep after you use it. And, the number one reason a handgun is favored over a woman #1 - You can buy a silencer for a handgun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little David was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up -- firefighter, police officer, sales rep, doctor, lawyer, etc. David was being uncharacteristically quiet, so the teacher asked him about his father. "My father''s an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret, and takes off all his clothes in front of other men, and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer''s really good, he''ll go home with some guy and make love with him for money." The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly sent the other children to work on some exercises and took little David aside to ask him, "Is that really true about your father?" "No," said David, "He actually works for the "RE-ELECT BUSH" Organization, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was probably having sex. Worried the girl might become pregnant, and that this would reflect badly on the whole family, she consulted the family doctor. The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He recommended that she arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms. That evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the woman told her about her visit to the doctor and handed her a box of condoms. The girl burst out laughing and reached over to hug her mother, saying: "Oh Mom! You don''t have to worry about that! I''m dating Susan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Reasons Why It''s So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder 1. The DNA is all the same. 2. There are no dental records.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling. "I''m O.K. but I didn''t like the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery," he answered. "What did he say?" asked the nurse. "OOPS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nothing has really changed, even though we think we''ve gotten smarter, and technologically advanced. We''ve just gone back to square one! "Doctor, I have an ear ache." 2000 B.C. - "Here, eat this root." 1000 B.C. - "That root is heathen, say this prayer." 1850 A.D. - "That prayer is superstition, drink this potion." 1940 A.D. - "That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill." 1985 A.D. - "That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic." 2004 A.D. - "That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a sheep that does karate? A: A lamb chop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book? A: They all have phones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are Democrats better than Republicans in bed? You''ve never heard of getting a good piece of elephant, have you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Bush/Cheney ''04: We''re Gooder! 2. Bush/Cheney ''04: Leave no Child a Dime! 3. Bush/Cheney ''04: Because the Truth Just isn''t Good Enough. 4. Vote Bush in ''04: It''s a no-brainer! 5. Bush/Cheney ''04: Compassionate Colonialism 6. Bush/Cheney ''04: Leave no Billionaire Behind 7. Bush/Cheney ''04: Putting the "con" in conservatism 8. Bush/Cheney ''04: Thanks for not Paying Attention 9. Bush/Cheney ''04: The Last Vote You''ll Ever Have to Cast 10. Bush/Cheney ''04: This Time, Elect Us! 11. Bush/Cheney ''04: Four More Wars 12. Bush/Cheney ''04: Asses of Evil 13. Bush/Cheney ''04: Assimilate. Resistance is Futile 14. Bush/Cheney ''04: Apocalypse Now! 15. Vote Bush in ''04: Because Dictatorship is Easier 16. George W. Bush: A Brainwave away from the Presidency 17. George W. Bush: It Takes a Village Idiot 18. Don''t Think. Vote Bush! 19. BU_ _SH_ _!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God give me patience....And make it quick!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is showering up in a locker room with his buddy when he notices his friend has a huge penis. "Damn Bob, you''re hung!" Jim exclaims. "I wasn''t always this impressive, I had to work for it." "What do you mean?" Jim asked. "Well, every day for the past two years I''ve spent an hour each night rubbing it with butter. I know it sounds crazy but it actually made it grow 4 inches! You should try it." Jim agrees and the two say good bye. A few weeks later the two are in the same locker room and Bob asks Jim how his situation was. Jim replied, "I did what you said but my penis has actually gotten smaller! I lost two inches already!" "Did you do everything I told you? An hour each day with butter?" "Well, butter is expensive, so I''ve been using Crisco." "Crisco?" Bob exclaimed, "No wonder, man, Crisco''s shortening!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young couple decide to have sex for the first time so they go to the store to buy condoms. They find a popular brand and bring it to the register. The price on the box is $1.00 but when the cashier totals up the price it comes to $1.07. The couple asks what the extra 7 cents is for. The cashier replies back "tax." Then the young man says "I was wondering what held it on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama is so flat chested, the last time she had a breast was in a bucket at KFC.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Buddhist approaches a hotdog vendor and says: "Make me one with everything." He gives the vendor a $20 bill and waits. Finally he says: "Where''s my change?" Says the vendor: "All change must come from within."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all of the rascally behavior that was going on. He decided to send an angel down to Earth to check it out, so he called one of His angels and sent the angel to Earth for a time. When he returned, he told God, "Yes, it is bad on Earth; 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are not." God thought for a moment and said, "Maybe I had better send down a second angel to get another opinion." So God called another angel and sent him to Earth for a time too. When the angel returned he went to God and said, "Yes, it''s true, the Earth is in decline; 95% are misbehaving, but 5% are being good." God was not pleased, so He decided to E-mail the 5% that were good, because He wanted to encourage them. Give them a little something to help them keep going. Do you know what the Email said? Just wondering, I didn''t get one either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does the tooth fairy give for half a tooth? A: Nothing. She wants the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross a Scottish sheep with a Peruvian Mountain Goat? A: The Dolly Llama.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8." Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. "Religion?" "Baptist." "Go to room 18, but be very quiet as you pass room 8." A third man arrives at the gates. "Religion?" "Jewish." "Go to room 11, but be very quiet as you pass room 8." The man says, "I can understand there being different rooms for different religions, but why must I be quiet when I pass room 8?" St. Peter tells him, "Well the Catholics are in room 8, and they think they''re the only ones here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father, angry at his son for not doing well at school tells him, "At your age, George Washington was the best student in his class." "Yeah dad..." replies the kid..."and at yours, he was the President of the United States!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest came to a dying author to read him his last rites. "Do you reject the devil?" asked the priest. "This is no time to be making enemies," replied the author.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop stops a man for running a stop sign and the subject gives the cop a lot of grief explaining that he did stop. After several minutes, the cop explained to the gentleman that he didn''t stop, he just slowed down a little. The gentleman said "Stop or slow down, what''s the difference?" The cop pulled the guy out of the car and hit him with a nightstick for about a minute and then said, "Would you like for me to stop or just slow down?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WIFE : " I wish I was a newspaper, so I''d be in your hands all day." HUSBAND : " I too wish that you were a newspaper, so I could have a new one everyday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do fish paint with? Water colours!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do fish keep their life savings? At the river bank!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If someone leads but no one follows... are they just out for a walk? Is it possible for someone to become addicted to therapy? And If so, how would you treat them? Crime doesn''t pay... does that mean my job is a crime? Why is it that normal people are the ones you don''t know? Why is it that when our kids are naughty we ask "Do you want a spanking?" What are they going to say, "Yes please, may I have two?"... Why is it you get a penny for your thoughts but have to put in your two cents worth? May I refuse to inherit the earth? Practice makes perfect, but if nobody''s perfect, why practice?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men were talking. "So, how''s your sex life?" "Oh, nothing special. I''m having Social Security sex." "Social Security sex?" "Yeah, you know: I get a little each month, but not enough to live on!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife went in to see a therapist and said, "I''ve got a big problem, doctor. Every time we''re in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this ear splitting yell." "My dear," the shrink said, "that''s completely natural. I don''t see what the problem is." "The problem is," she complained, "It wakes me up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tired of a listless sex life, the man came right out and asked his wife during a recent lovemaking session, "How come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?" She glanced at him casually and replied, "You''re never home!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was in a terrible accident, and his "manhood" was mangled and torn from his body. His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance wouldn''t cover the surgery, since it was considered cosmetic. The doctor said the cost would be $3,500 for "small", $6,500 for "medium", $14,000 for "large." The man was sure he would want a medium or large, but the doctor urged him to talk it over with his wife before he made any decision. The man called his wife on the phone and explained their options. The doctor came back into the room, and found the man looking dejected. "Well, what have the two of you decided?" asked the doctor. The man answered, "She''d rather remodel the kitchen".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole and Sven are neighbors in Minnesota. Ole is in need of a new milk cow. He hears about a nice one for sale over the border in Wisconsin. He drives over to Wisconsin, looks at the cow, and reaches under to see if she gives milk. When he grabs the teat and pulls, the cow farts. Ole is very surprised, looks at the farmer who is selling the cow, and reaches under the cow to try again. He grabs another teat, pulls, and the cow farts again. Milk does come out, however, so after some discussion, Ole decides to buy the cow anyway and take it home. He calls over his neighbor, Sven, and says, "Come here and look at dis new cow I yust bought. Pull her teat and see vat happens dere." Sven reaches under and pulls; the cow farts. Sven looks at Ole and says, "You bought dis cow over dere in Visconsin, yah?" Ole is very surprised and says, "Yah, dats right, how did you know dat?" Sven says, "My vife is from Visconsin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People who live in glass houses should make love in the basement. Never read the fine print. There ain''t no way you''re going to like it. If you let a smile be your umbrella, then most likely your ass will get soaking wet. The only two things we do with greater frequency in middle age are urinate and attend funerals. The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket. To err is human, to forgive - highly unlikely Do you realize that in about 40 years, we''ll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos? Money can''t buy happiness -- but somehow it''s more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than in a Hyundai. Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.. Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween. After a certain age, if you don''t wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What happens when a Buddhist becomes totally absorbed with the computer he is working with? A: He enters Nerdvana.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m dyslexic, and attended a conference about the disorder with a friend. The speakers asked us to share a personal experiences with the group. I told them stress aggravates my condition, in which I reverse words and letters when I''m tense. When I finished speaking, my friend leaned over and whispered to me, "Now I know why you named your daughter Hannah."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Any time the alarm goes off after-hours at the municipal office where I work, the security company calls me at home and I have to go back and reset it. Late at night I got one of those calls. As I was getting ready to head out the door, my husband groggily said: "You''re not going down there by yourself at this hour." Just as I was thinking: "How thoughtful of him", he added, "Better take the dog with you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rushing to work, I was driving too fast and as a result was pulled over by the highway patrol. The state trooper noticed that my shirt had the name of a local high school on it. "I teach math there," I explained. The trooper smiled, and said, "Okay, here''s a problem. A teacher is speeding down the highway at 16 m.p.h over the limit. At $12 for every m.p.h over the limit, plus $40 costs, plus the rise in her insurance, what''s her total cost? I replied, "Taking the total, subtracting the low salary I receive, multiplying by the number of kids who hate math, then adding to that the fact that none of us would be anywhere without teachers, I''d say zero." He handed me back my license. "Math was never my favorite subject," he addmitted. "Please slow down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting a new girlfriend is like joining the Army. You get a new haircut and new clothes, and all information is given to you on a need-to-know basis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening two bachelors were talking over dinner. The conversation drifted from sports to politics, and then to cooking. "I got a cookbook once," said the bachelor. "But I couldn''t do anything with it." "Too much fancy stuff in it, huh?" asked his friend. "You said it." The first guy replied, nodding. "Every one of those recipes began the same way: ''Take a clean plate....''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Former Vice President Dan Quayle says that if you take out the profanity, the TV show "The Osbounes" is about good family values. You take out the profanity, and "The Osbournes" is about 30 seconds long.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ralph was one his way home from work on night, when to his horror, he suddenly realized that he''d completely forgotten his daughter''s birthday. He rushed to the toy store and asked the manager, "How much is the Barbie in the window?" "Which one?" The manager replied. "We have Workout Barbie for $19.95, Malibu Barbie for $19.95, Soccer Barbie is 19.95, Cinderella Barbie $19.95, Retro ''70''s Barbie $19.95, and Divorced Barbie $375." "Hold on," Ralph said. "Why is Divorced Barbie $375 when all the other Barbies are only $19.95?" "Well," said the store manager. "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken''s car, Ken''s house, Ken''s boat, Ken''s dog, Ken''s cat, Ken''s furniture....."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my wife and I showed up at a very popular restaurant, it was crowded. My wife went up to the hostess (who was blonde) and asked, "Will it be long?" The hostess, ignoring her, kept on writing in her book. My wife again asked "How much of a wait?" The blonde looked up, "About ten minutes." A short time later, the blonde got on the loudspeaker, and announced "Willette B. Long, your table is ready."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently I was behind a car with three bumper stickers: Don''t be fooled by genetically engineered food--demand labels and safety testing for food; Eat for the health of it; and Support organic farmers." The car was in front of me at a McDonalds drive-through.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady walked into a bar and there were no seats available, except for one at a table that was occupied by a man, and she decides to take it. He said, "Hello, my name is Jim Snow, what''s yours?" The women replied, "June." She went to get a drink and Jim Snow sat there smiling at her. When she came back he still sat there smiling. June was a little embarrassed, so she bashfully said, "Why are you smiling at me like that?" Jim answered, "Well, just imagine having 6 inches of Snow in June!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the nicest thing about a nudist wedding? You don''t have to ask - you can see who the best man is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies? A bingo machine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('True bravery is arriving home late after a boy''s night out, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and still having the guts to ask: Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a hotel and asked for a room. The guy behind the counter said there is only one room left but it is haunted. The man does not believe this so he gets the room. That night the man hears a voice saying "I`m gonna find you, I`m gonna get you, I`m gonna eat you!" The man runs away scared. The next day a father and his daughter get the room after they were warned. That night they hear "I`m gonna find you, I`m gonna get you, I`m gonna eat you!" The girl hides under the bed as the father follows the sound to the closet. He opens the door. There on the floor sits a little boy, picking his nose, saying "I`m gonna find you, I`m gonna get you, I`m gonna eat you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a hotel and asks for a room. The guy behind the counter tells him that there is one room left but it is haunted. The man gets the room anyway. That night he hears in a soft voice "If the log rolls over we`ll all die!" He runs away. The next day a father and his daughter get the room after they were told that it is haunted. That night they hear "If the log rolls over we`ll all die!" The girl hides under the bed as the father follows the sound to the bathroom door. He opens the door. There on the ground is a bunch of ants staring at a turd saying, "If the log rolls over, we''ll all die!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farm boy accidentally overturned a wagonload of corn. A farmer, who lived nearby, heard the noise and yelled to the boy, "Hey, Willis, forget your troubles and come in for a visit. I''ll help you pick the wagon up later." "That''s mighty nice of you," Willis answered, "but Pa wouldn''t like me to." "Aw, come on, boy," the farmer insisted. "Well, OK" the boy finally agreed, "but Pa won''t like it." After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. "I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset." "Don''t be foolish," the neighbor said with a smile; "by the way, where is he?" "Under the wagon," replied the boy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the definition of wicker box? It''s what Elmer Fudd wants to do to Madonna.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so dumb that she thought Taco Bell was a Mexican phone company.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Jose and Josbe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Janet''s son, Trevor, lived in Georgia with his mom. Over the summer, Trevor went to California. On his way back to home, he decided to stop at an "adult video" store. The manager asked if he had an account. He admitted he didn''t, and asked to start one. The manager asked for his phone number and he gave it to them. The manager then replied, "It says that the account is under the name of Janet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W. Bush was invited to visit the Queen of England. The Queen gets her finest horses and buggy. When Bush gets off the plane, and onto the buggy, Bush and the Queen ingage in a conversation. In the middle of their conversation, one of the horse let out a really big, really smelly fart. The Queen quickly apoligizes and says "I''m sorry, theirs somethings not even a Queen can control." Bush replies "Ma''am, if you wouldn''t have said anything, I would have thought it was the horse."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nine year old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned at Sunday school. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. "When he got to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. "Then he used his walkie-talkie to radio headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved." "Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked. "Well, no. But if I told it the way the teacher did, you''d never believe it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Interviewer : Give me the opposite words. Banta Singh : OK. Interviewer : Made in India. Banta Singh : Destroyed in Pakistan. Interviewer : Good .... Keep it up. Banta Singh : Bad .... Put it down. Interviewer : Maxi - mum Banta Singh : Mini - dad Interviewer : Enough! Take your seat. Banta Singh : Insufficient! Don''t take my seat. Interviewer : Idiot! Take your seat. Banta Singh : Clever! Don''t take my seat. Interviewer : I say you get out! Banta Singh : You didn''t say I come in. Interviewer : I reject you! Banta Singh : You appoint me. Interviewer : .....!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, three friends met at an inn after not seeig each other for a very long time. They chatted for an hour or so, and then the topic turned to their wives. A: You know, something strange happened during my wife''s delivery. She was reading a book called "The Two Brothers" before her delivery and she gave birth to ''two'' children ! Isn''t that strange?" B: Yeah, but you want to know something stranger ? A similar thing happened to my wife, when she was pregnant ! She was reading the book "Amar, Akbar and Antony", and she gave birth to ''three children'' !!!" On hearing this, the third person C, took to his heels and started running. The other two were puzzled but they ran after C and caught up with him. A: "Hey C. Why did you run off ?" C: "My wife''s pregnant now and she''s reading "Alibaba and the Forty Thieves" !!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day an American General, a Russian General and an Indian General were all going to England in a ship. All of them were very boastful. AG : "I have the bravest and most courageous crew in the world. See for yourselves. Oy, you!" (he called to an American soldier) "Swim around this moving ship." The American soldier jumped into the sea without a word, and swam around the moving ship and returned. AG : See the guts ! RG : "Oh, that''s nothing. See this. You, (he called to a Russian soldier) swim 5 rounds around this moving ship!" The Russian soldier also jumped into the sea and swam 5 times around the moving ship and returned. RG : "See the guts!" IG : "Oh, that''s nothing compared to MY soldiers. You, (he called to Banta Singh) swim 10 times around this moving ship!" Banta Singh : "Am I your servant?" IG : "See the guts!" AG & RG : ....!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Proverb : Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Refined by me : Behind every successful man, there is a very much surprised woman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were having some problems and giving each other the silent treatment. The man realized that he''d need his wife to wake him the next morning at 5:00 a.m, for an early flight to Chicago. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence, he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 a.m." The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 a.m. and that he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn''t woken him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 a.m. Wake up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she plays hopscotch like this : Washington, California, Nevada, now Arizona', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father was approached by his small son, who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you ''know'' what the Bible means?" The son replied, "I do know!" "Okay," said his father. "So, son, what does the Bible mean?" "That''s easy, Daddy. It stands for ''Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Norfolk to Las Vegas. The son, who had been looking out the window, turned to his mother and said, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don''t big planes have baby planes?" The mother, who couldn''t think of an answer, told her son to ask the flight attendant. So the boy asked the flight attendant, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don''t big planes have baby planes?" The flight attendant asked, "Did your mother tell you to ask me?" The boy said that she had. Smiling, she then said, "Tell your Mother that Southwest always pulls out on time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is the epitaph on the gravestone of an army mule: Here lies Maggie, who in her time kicked two colonels, four majors, ten captains, twenty-four lieutenants, forty-two sergeants, four hundred eighty-six privates, and one bomb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a story about a monastery perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the air. The only way to reach the monastery was to be suspended in a basket which was pulled to the top by several monks who pulled and tugged with all their strength. Obviously the ride up the steep cliff in that basket was terrifying. One tourist got exceedingly nervous about halfway up as he noticed that the rope by which he was suspended was old and frayed. With trembling voice, he asked the monk who was riding with him in the basket how often they changed the rope. The monk thought for a moment and answered brusquely, "Whenever it breaks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A story is told of a Jewish man who was riding on the subway reading an Arab newspaper. A friend of his, who happened to be riding in the same subway car, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he approached the newspaper reader. "Moshe, have you lost your mind? Why are you reading an Arab newspaper?" Moshe replied, "I used to read the Jewish newspaper, but what did I find? Jews being persecuted, Israel being attacked, Jews disappearing through assimilation and intermarriage, Jews living in poverty. So I switched to the Arab newspaper. Now what do I find? Jews own all the banks, Jews control the media, Jews are all rich and powerful, Jews rule the world. The news is so much better!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An undertaker had a busy day at work, and in front of him, was 3 new bodies that had been sent from the hospital. The first one his mouth opened wide. He then moved on to see the next body. It too had opened his mouth widely. Surprised, he went over to the last body. This body was charred and had a huge smile on his face. Feeling puzzled, he turned to ask the hospital personnel:&quot; What actually happened to these people? &quot;Well..&quot; replied the personnel, &quot;The first man died from laughing too much at a joke.&quot; &quot;The second man died while telling a very funny joke.&quot; &quot;The last man..well, he died while taking a picture. At least that was what he thought he was doing. He thought that the lightning was a camera''s flash.&quot;', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, there were three male dogs that set eyes on a beautiful female poodle. They all rushed over to her. Aware of her charms, she said, "I will go out with the first one of you who can use the words ''liver'' and ''cheese'' together in an intelligent sentence." Immediately the Lab said, "I like liver and cheese." "No imagination at all," said the poodle. Next was the muscular Rottweiler, who blurted, "I hate liver and cheese." "That''s worse than the Lab," she replied. Finally a tiny Chihuahua smiled at his opponents, gave the poodle a knowing wink, and said, "Liver alone, cheese mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a very stupid parrot that could only say: "Who''s there?" So one fine evening, while its owner was out shopping, the gas delivery man arrived at the door. He pressed the door bell and waited for the door to be opened. At that moment, the parrot said: "Who''s there?" The man then promptly replied: "Gas delivery man." The parrot then spoke: "Who''s there?" The man then repeated himself again. After several hours, the owner returned home. He was shocked to find a man outside his door, foaming in his mouth. Puzzled, he said:" Who''s that?" A voice from inside the house replied: "Gas delivery man."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy comes home from work one day to find his dog with the neighbor''s pet rabbit in his mouth. The rabbit is dead and the guy panics. He thinks the neighbors are going to hate him forever, so he takes the dirty, chewed up rabbit into the house and gives it a bath, blow dries its fur and puts the rabbit back into the cage at the neighbor''s house, hoping they will think it died of natural causes. A few days later, the neighbor is outside and asks the guy, "Did you hear that Fluffy died?" The guy stumbles around and says, "Um.. no.. um.. what happened?" The neighbor replies, "We just found him dead in his cage one day, but the weird thing is that the day after we buried him we went outside and someone had dug him up, gave him a bath and put him back into the cage. There must be some real sick people out there!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher to student: "I just read the composition on ''My House'' that you had submitted." Student: "Yes, is there anything wrong?" Teacher: "No. It was excellent. It was exactly the same composition that your older brother submitted last year." Student: "Well...we live in the same house..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young woman goes shopping and buys one bar of soap, one yogurt, one microwave dinner for one, one apple, and a romance novel. She goes to the checkout stand, where she notices that the clerk is staring at her. Flattered, she flutters her eyelashes and giggles nervously. He says, "Single, huh?" She replies coyly, "How did you guess?" "Because," he says, "You''re ugly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a Nascar race car, she burns rubber everynight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the sixth day, God created the platypus. And God said: Let''s see the evolutionists try and figure this one out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do women prefer old gynecologists? A. They have shaky hands!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Matters had progressed to the point where the freshman and his date were naked in the motel bed when the girl had a change of heart. "I suppose you''re going to tell me now that you''re waiting for ''Mr. Right''," he said dejectedly. "That''s a silly old romantic notion," laughed the coed. "I''m just waiting for ''Mr. Big''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Jim, a duck, was swimming in a pond when he came up to another duck and asked "What are doing?" "Blowing bubbles," she replied. Jim met 3 more ducks and they all said the same thing. When Jim came up to a 5th duck he said "Let me guess, you''re blowing bubbles?" "No," said the duck, "I am Bubbles!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s green, has 3 eyes, sharp teeth, and blood on its face? A: I don''t know, but it''s on your shoulder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If there are 12 cats on a fence and 1 cat jumps off, how many are left? None, they''re all copycats!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears? A: She was afraid she might get hearing aids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What did the blonde''s right leg say to her left leg? A:Nothing, they haven''t met yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes observed in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger: Blonde#1: I can''t seem to get this door unlocked! Blonde#2: Well, you''d better hurry up and try harder, its starting to rain and the top is down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman pulled a blonde over because she was driving the wrong way on a one-way street. Cop: Do you know where you were going? Blonde: No, but wherever it is, it must be bad ''cause all the people are leaving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma cooks so bad, your family prays after they eat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three midgets. Each one wanted to win a world record. The first midget went in to the place for world records and said I want to see if I have the worlds smallest hands. He came happy and said i got the record. So the second one goes in and says I want to see if I can get the record for the worlds smallest feet. He came out all happy and said i got the record. Then the last one goes in and said I want to see if I have the worlds smallest penis. He came out all sad and said, "Who the in the hell Michael Jackson?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so hairy . . . . . she has to have a hair trapper in her kitchen sink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat I had to take five trains, eight cars, and twelve airplanes just to get around her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blondes are like pool tables - every time you put a dollar in, she''ll rack your balls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Say "Darn, officer you must have been going fast to catch up with me." 2. When he approaches you, look at his gut and say, "Hmmm, I thought officers were supposed to be physically fit." 3. Sway and ask if his bulletproof vest protects him from projectile vomiting. 4. Lie on the ground and ask him to draw your outline in chalk. 5. Throw his nightstick and tell the police dog to go fetch it. 6. Ask if you can use his pepper spray to spice up your pizza. 7. Tell him you wanted to be a cop, but I decided to graduate high school. 8. When he asks you to walk the line "Riverdance" instead. 9. Instead of pleading with the 5th amendment, plead with the 13th or 16th. 10. When he asks for your license, say, "Oh, sure, officer, could you hold my beer for a sec?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The slick defense lawyer was drilling the star witness, in an attempt to ruffle the mans feathers, and secure his own case. He began egging him on. "You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man of your background" the lawyer sneered. The witness replied, "If I wasn''t under oath, I''d return the compliment."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn''t find a space with a meter. So he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don''t park here, I''ll miss my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES." When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note: "I''ve circled this block for 10 years. If I don''t give you a ticket, I''ll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three boys are walking along the beach one day when they see a cave. The first boy goes in and is just looking at a banknote on a big rock when a ghostly voice calls out, "I am the ghost of Auntie Mabel and this five dollars stays on the table!" The second boy goes in and is reaching for the money when the same thing happens again. The third boy goes in, sees the five dollars and cries out, "I am the ghost of David Crockett and this five dollars goes in my pocket!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three ants went to the beach to swim. Two jumped directly in the water. The other went back home and after an hour returned. Why? She forgot her swimming suit!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Danny, asked Mrs Waters, "What''s usually used as a conductor of electricity?" "Why- er..." "Correct, wire. Now tell me, what is the unit of electrical power?" "The what??" That''s absolutely right. The watt."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a strip club and sees a really pretty girl right in front of him. He goes up to her and asks, "Hey, Honey, want to come home with me?" She says yes. They go back to his house that night and they have sex. Throughout this whole time he hasn''t been able to see her properly. When she rolls into the moonlight, he caught a glimpse of her. "What, the...! What are you doing here?" He had just realised that he was in bed wth his mother-in-law!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A white man, a Cuban, and a Mexican, are all sitting at a bar when the Mexican throws a taco out the window. The white man asks, "Why''d you throw that taco out?" The Mexican replies, "Where I come from we have a lot of those." Next the Cuban throws some weed out the window. The Mexican asks, "Why''d you throw that weed out?" The Cuban replies, "Where I come from we have a lot of that..." Suddenly the white man throws the Mexican out the window. The Cuban, shocked, asks, "Why''d you throw him out the window?!" The white man answers, "Well..where I come from we have A LOT of those."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup to ya later!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cats does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Cats can''t hold a light bulb', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that a car hit her and she turned around and said "Hey! Who threw that rock!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? To. To who? To you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you titillate an ocelot? Oscillate its tit a lot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the appointed day, St. Peter escorted John to the Holy Mother''s sanctuary. John went before Her, knelt, and said: "Holy Mother, I''ve always looked to You for guidance, and You have granted me peace and serenity through some difficult times. But I have one question that has nagged me during my whole time on earth. In all the paintings that were done of you, and in all the sculptures that were carved of you, you always looked so sad. Why is that?" Mary thought for a moment, pursing her lips. She said: "I always wanted a girl."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a big controversy on the Jewish view of exactly when life begins. In Jewish tradition, the fetus is not considered viable until after it graduates from medical school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid... She site on the T.V and watches the couch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, she''s the reason they declared world hunger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is like a hockey player. She doesn''t change her pad for three periods.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, that every time you smack her butt, you can ride the waves!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father asked his son: "Why do you take the medicine before it''s time? " The son answered:" To surprise the germs! "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack was summoned by the Disciplinarian where his son, Tracey was enrolled. Tracey always throw stones at his playmates and he never missed. Jack replied to the Disciplinarian : Sir, please look at the bright side. My son will grow up to be a very effective baseball pitcher.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked her children just before they were about to leave class for Mass, "And why is it necessary to be quiet during Mass?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl went to a dentist to have her teeth filled. The dentist asked, "What kind of fillings do you want? White or silver?" The girl replied, "Chocolate fillings."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two muffins were sitting next to each other, in an oven, as they were being cooked. One muffin turned to the other muffin, and said, "Man, it''s hot in here." Then the other muffin turned to the first muffin and screamed, "AHHH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story that happened in a South African hospital. There was this case in the hospital where a patient always died in the same bed and on a Friday morning regardless of his medical condition. This puzzles the doctors and some even think it has something to do with the supernatural. One day, all the doctors decide to go down to the ward where it always happens on the Friday mornings. They want to take a look at what''s going on. Friday morning comes and everyone''s at the hospital ward waiting for the terrible phenomenon to occur again. Right at the expected time, the cleaner comes in and unplugs the life support system so that she can use the vacuum!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CO-PILOT: Commander! We are being attacked! COMMANDER: Report your height and status! CO-PILLOT: I''m 5''11 and sittin'' in the cockpit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One to his friend: "My little brother started walking last week!" The other friend: "Where did he go? He should be kilometers away!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dad to his son: If someone calls for me, tell him that I''m out. The son: And if he doesn''t call?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked his student: Give me an example of 6 animals. The student: 3 Lions, 2 Tigers , and 1 Cheetah !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Suddenly the electricity went off in the house of a blonde. So, she wanted to light a match. After being tired of looking for the match, she blew out the candle and went to sleep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning a man came into the church on crutches. He stopped in front of the holy water, put some on both legs, and then threw away his crutches. An altar boy witnessed the scene and then ran into the rectory to tell the priest what he''d just seen. "Son, you''ve just witnessed a miracle!" the priest said. "Tell me, where is this man now?" "Flat on his butt over by the holy water!" the boy informed him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel. I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents. The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I''d accumulated a fortune of $1.37. Then my wife''s father died and left us two million dollars."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they''d be called bagels!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two guys in the Army. One day one of the guys gets a letter from his mother and after reading it becomes very sad. His friend asked him what was wrong. The first guy responded by handing him the letter. So the second guy reads that his friend''s mother had written that the first guy''s girlfriend was in bed with arthritis. "Well" The friend said to the first guy... "That''s not so bad..." The first guy turns to him and says "Yea, That''s what you think. I know those Ritis boys and Art is the worst one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob, an extremely wealthy 60-year-old, arrives at a country club with a beautiful and charming 25-year-old blonde. His buddies at the club are all aghast. They corner him and ask, "Bob, how''d you get the trophy girlfriend?" Bob exclaims, "Girlfriend? She''s my wife!" His friends are shocked, but continue to ask, "So, how''d you persuade her to marry you?" Bob replies, "I lied about my age." His friends respond, "What do you mean? Did you tell her you were only 40?" Bob smiles and says, "No, I told her I was 90."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah the Prophet and the false prophets of Baal. She explained how Elijah built the altar, put wood upon it, cut the steer in pieces and laid it upon the altar. And then Elijah commanded the people of God to fill four barrels of water and pour it over the altar. He had them do this four times. "Now," said the teacher, "can anyone in the class tell me why the Lord would have Elijah pour water over the steer on the altar?" A little girl in the back of the room raised her hand with great enthusiasm. "To make the gravy," came her reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A candidate brought dice into the examination hall for MCQ. He started tossing the dice to select his answers. The superintendent just gave a glimpse at this candidate, as he passed by, as it is common to have students trying their luck. Very soon the candidate finished his whole paper and slept on his table. Half an hour later, the candidate sat up, and started tossing the dice again The superintendent felt curious, and approached the candidate. Superintendent : "Gentleman, why are you tossing the dice again, since you''ve already finished all the questions earlier on?" Candidate : "Sir, I have to double check my answers"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of flashlight do blonds use? The solar powered kind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat she can give the homeless a home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I slide to first. I feel like I''m going to burst. Diarrhea, diarrhea. I slide to two. My pants are filled with goo. Diarrhea, diarrhea. I slide to third. I dropped a runny turd. Diarrhea, diarrhea. I slide to home. My pants are filled with foam. Diarrhea, diarrhea. First its in the pants, then its on the floor. I make a 20 yard dash to the bathroom door. Some people think its funny. Its coming out back runny. Well, diarrhea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nurse dies and goes to heaven. She is met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter who asks her questions about her life. Over St. Peter''s shoulder the nurse spots a man in a white coat sitting on a cloud with a stethoscope around his neck. "Oh brother!" she cries. "Is that a doctor?" St Peter glances over his shoulder and says, "No, that''s God. He just thinks he''s a doctor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Additional quotes made by physicians in actual medical records: 1. Discharge status: alive but without permission. 2. The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983. 3. The patient refused an autopsy. 4. The patient has no past history of suicides. 5. Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital. 6. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant. 7. Since she can not get pregnant with her husband, I thought you would like to work her up. 8. She is numb from her toes down. 9. Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches. 10. Exam of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized. 11. Rectal exam revealed a normal size thyroid. 12. The patient was prepped and raped in the usual manner. 13. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Staff physicians include Dr. Who, Dr. Kevorkian, and Dr. Demento. 2. Tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicle. 3. Annual breast exam conducted at Hooters. 4. With your last HMO, your birth control pills didn''t come in different colors with little "M''s" on them. 5. Your "primary care physician" is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month. 6. Directions to your doctor''s office include, "Take a left when you enter the trailer park." 7. Your kidney transplant surgery is held up while your surgeon awaits his arrangement for grave robbing. 8. The only expense covered 100% is embalming. 9. Only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter. 10. Only item listed under Preventive Care feature of coverage is "an apple a day". 11. The "Patient responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges" is not a typo. 12. You ask for Viagra. You get a Popsicle stick and duct tape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you need a driver''s license to buy liquor when you can''t drink and drive?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl learned in school, that instead of words, pictures and symbols would be drawn to indicate something if words weren''t understood. Later that day, she needed to go into the bathroom, looked at two pictures, and went in one. A teacher asked her, "Why did you go into the boys'' bathroom?" She answered, "The picture showed a person wearing pants, and I''m wearing pants. The other picture showed someone wearing a dress, and I''m not."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some friends were on vacation in Maine, and while watching fireworks heard their small son say, "Oh, God!" The father quickly cautioned his son, "Please don''t speak the Lord''s name in vain." The boy nodded but obviously mis-heard, because he asked quietly, "Is it OK if I speak his name back in Minnesota?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And Moses looked upon the Lord and said: "We are your chosen people and you want us to cut the tips off of our WHAT?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife: I always bring your picture with me everyday when I go to the office. Husband: Oh. That must be because you love me so much. Wife: No, it''s because whenever I see your picture, I realize that however hard the problem is in office, I''m lucky with my work because there is a much bigger problem and that''s you." Husband:Ouch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor. Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy) Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you? Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I''m dumb? Doctor: Then why are you so happy? Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Bean: (crying) "The doctor called, Mom''s dead." Friend: "Condolence, my friend." After receiving a phone call, Mr. Bean cries even louder. Friend: "What now?" Mr. Bean: "My sister just called, her mom died too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('AA and AA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lumber camp advertises for a lumberjack. A skinny little guy shows up at the camp the next day carrying an axe. The head lumberjack takes one look at the puny little guy and tells him to get lost. "Give me a chance to show you what I can do," says the skinny guy. "Okay, see that giant redwood over there?" says the head lumberjack. "Take your axe and cut it down." The guy heads for the tree, and in five minutes he''s knocking on the lumberjack''s door. "I cut the tree down," says the guy. The lumberjack can''t believe his eyes and says, "Where did you learn to chop down trees like that?" "In the Sahara Forest," says the puny man. "You mean the Sahara Desert," says the lumberjack. "Sure......!! That''s what they call it now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who lived in a block of apartments thought it was raining and put his head out the window to check. As he did so a glass eye fell into his hand. He looked up to see where it came from in time to see a young woman looking down. "Is this yours?" he asked. She said, "Yes, could you bring it up?" and the man agreed. On arrival she was profuse in her thanks and offered the man a drink. As she was very attractive he agreed. Shortly afterwards she said, "I''m about to have dinner. There''s plenty. Would you like to join me?" He readily accepted her offer and both enjoyed a lovely meal. As the evening was drawing to a close the lady said, "I''ve had a marvelous evening. Would you like to stay the night?" The man hesitated then said, "Do you act like this with every man you meet?" "No," she replied, "Only those who catch my eye."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women came before King Solomon, dragging between them a young man. "This young man agreed to marry my daughter," said one. "No! He agreed to marry my daughter!" said the other. And so, they haggled before the king until he called for silence. "Bring me my biggest sword," he said, "and I shall cut the young man in half. Each of you shall receive a half." "Sounds good to me," said the first woman. But the other woman said, "Oh sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let the other woman''s daughter marry him." The wise king did not hesitate a moment. "The young man shall marry the first woman''s daughter," he proclaimed. "But she was willing to cut him in two!" exclaimed the king''s court. "Indeed," said King Solomon, "that shows that she is indeed the true mother-in-law."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Librarian: "Please be quiet. The people next to you can''t read." Boy: "What a shame! I''ve been reading since I was six."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman, who had just been married to a gambling man, had learned upon marrying him that he always came home well after midnight. She didn''t like this one bit, and no amount of reasoning with him would make him miss a night out with the guys, so every night for a week she would stay up till he came home, and when she heard him enter the house she would call out: "Is that you, Ben?" She did this for a week, and then he started coming home promptly at 7:00 every night. Why, you might ask? His name was Jacob.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Briton, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden. "Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British." "Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They''re naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French." "No clothes, no shelter," the Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they''re being told this is paradise. They are Russian."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp, "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?" As the shopkeeper''s heart melts, he gets down on his knees, so that he''s on her level, and asks, "Do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabbit, or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabbit over there?" She, in turn, blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice... "I don''t fink my pet pyfon weally gives a thit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day little Billy was walking past his mother''s room when he heard strange noises. He opened thecracked the door, and looked in. He saw his mother laying naked on the bed rubbing her hands all over her body moaning "I need a man! I need a man!" A couple of days later as he walked past her room he heard the noises again so he looked into her room and saw his mother laying naked on the bed rubbing her hands all over her body moaning "I need a man! I need a man!" A few days later as he walked past her room he heard some more strange noises coming from her room, so he looked in again. This time he saw his mother laying naked on the bed with a naked man laying on top of her. So he ran to his room, took off all his clothes, hopped into bed and started rubbing his hands all over his body moaning "I need a new bike! I need a new bike!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Molly wrote a letter to Santa Claus one day. Dear Santa, Please give me a Workout Barbie and a new milkman because he is sleeping with Mommy. Love, Molly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before setting off on a business trip to Tulsa, I called the hotel where I''d be staying to see if they had a gym. The hotel receptionist''s sigh had a tinge of exasperation in it when she answered. "We have over 300 guests at at this facility" she said. "Does this ''Jim'' have a last name?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The dean of a women''s college, addressing her charges, concluded, "...and remember, young ladies, you represent not only your own honor but that of the school. When approached by young men, ask yourself: Is an hour''s pleasure worth a lifetime of disgrace? Now, are there any questions?" A young lady immediately raised her hand and said, "Tell me, how do you make it last an hour?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a congregation that decided to have four worship services each Sunday. There was one for those new to the faith. Another for those who liked traditional worship. One for those who had lost their faith and would like to get itback. And another for those who had a bad experience withchurch and were complaining about it. They have names foreach of the services: "Finders, Keepers, Losers, Weepers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A beautiful blonde goes into a bar and sits down next to a guy that''s so homely looking, he hasn''t had a date in over a year, also, he''s sooooo dumb that one night he slept with a ruler next to his head to see how long he slept. He figures that he has absolutely no chance in the world to score a date with this ravishing buxom blonde, when suddenly she strikes up a conversation with him! Soon they become rather chummy. It starts to get late and the bartender calls out last drink for alcohol. The blonde leans over to the guy and says, "Let''s have this last drink at my apartment." Taken back by her request, and trembling, the guy finally utters the word, "Okay." They get up from the bar stool arm and arm headed for the door. The blonde stops him and says, "Before we go back to my apartment there''s one thing I have to tell you, I''m on my menstrual cycle." He says, ..."That''s ok, I''ll follow you in my Honda."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde filled her car with gas at a self-service gas station. After she had paid and driven away, she realized that she had left the gas cap on top of her car. She stopped and looked and, sure enough, it was lost. Well, she thought for a second and realized that other people must do the same thing from time to time, so maybe it was worth going back to look by the side of the road. She figured that even if she couldn''t find her own gas cap, she might be able to find one someone else lost that would fit her car. She didn''t have to search long when, sure enough, she found a gas cap. She tried it, and it went into place with a satisfying click. "Great," she thought, "I lost my gas cap, but I found another one that fits. And this one''s even better because it locks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, "I hear you Irish are a bunch of drinkin'' mother-fuckers. I''ll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back." The room is quiet and no one takes of the Texan''s offer. One man even leaves. Thirty minutes later the gentleman who left shows back up and taps the Texan on the shoulder. "Is your bet still good?" asks the Irishman. The Texan says yes and asks the bartender to line up 10 pints of Guinness. Immediately the Irishman tears into all 10 of the pint glasses, drinking them all back-to-back. The other pub patrons cheer as the Texan sits in amazement. The Texan gives the Irishman the $500 and says, "If ya don''t mind me askin'', where did you go for that 30 minutes?" The Irishman replies, "Oh, I had to go to the pub down the street to see if I could do it first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys are in an bar sitting around a log fire with their dogs and get to talkin'' about them. First one says, "My dog is called Woodworker. Go Woodworker!" The dog grabs a log from fire and with his teeth and fashions a beautiful figurine. Next one says, "My dog is called Stoneworker. Go Stoneworker!" The dog drags a rock from the fire front and creates a beautiful carving. Third one says, "My dog is called Iron Worker." He puts the fire tongs into the fire and gets them red hot. "Now," he says, "I''ll just touch him on the nose and you watch him make a bolt for the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golfer hits a wicked slice off the tee that ricochets through the trees and into the next fairway narrowly missing another golfer. When the first golfer gets to his ball he is greeted by his unintended victim who angrily tells him of the near miss. "I''m sorry, I didn''t have time to yell fore," says the first golfer. "That''s funny" replies the second, "you had plenty of time to yell ''SHIT!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she has to go on three weight loss systems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes people with a lot of cents have little sense.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama so fat that she bent over and got arrested for selling crack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so tall, she did a cartwheel and hit Jesus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat she has to get baptized in Sea World.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day God said that he would grant anyone in line a wish. This one guy got stuck at the back of the line, which made him kind of upset. The people before him went on through the line, and everybody wished that they could be beautiful. The last guy came up to God and said, "I wish that all the people that wished they were beautiful were ugly again." The next time that you''re last in line - be happy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a guy he had to deliver a package to the nearest town which took three days to get there. If he leaves on Friday and arrives on Friday how is that possible? He doesn''t stop to rest. *His horse''s name is Friday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a casket containing a mummy, a rather rare occurrence in Israel, to say the least. After examining it, he called Abe, the curator of the Israel museum in Jerusalem. "I''ve just discovered a 3,000 year old mummy of a man who died of heart failure!" the excited scientist exclaimed. Abe replied, "Bring him in. We''ll check it out." A week later, the amazed Abe called the archaeologist. "You were right about both the mummy''s age and cause of death. How in the world did you know?" "Easy. There was a piece of paper in his hand that said, ''10,000 Shekels on Goliath''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Hebrew people were sitting around Mt. Sinai. You could hear only a subdued murmur among them, but you could feel the tension in the air. For hours now, Moses had been on top of the mountain, hidden from their gaze by clouds wafting around its top. Sometimes the clouds became dark and you could hear thunder rolling down. In spite of the warm weather, this caused a shudder among the waiting mass. The end of day was approaching and dusk was beginning to set in when suddenly a figure came through the clouds and walked down the steep mountainside carrying a heavy load. It was Moses. Moses set down his load and raised his hands. "Friends," he said. "Friends, it was hard work and I have done my best. I have negotiated with Him. I used every possible argument, every trick I could think ofand I think I was successful. The good news is: I brought him down from 15 to 10. The bad news is: Adultery is still in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sid and Al were sitting in a Chinese restaurant. "Sid," asked Al, "Are there any Jews in China?" "I don''t know," Sid replied. "Why don''t we ask the waiter?" When the waiter came by, Al said, "Are there any Chinese Jews?" "I don''t know sir, let me ask," the waiter replied and he went into the kitchen. He quickly returned and said, "No, sir. No Chinese Jews." "Are you sure?" Al asked. "I will check again, sir." the waiter replied and went back to the kitchen. While he was still gone, Sid said, "I cannot believe there are no Jews in China. Our people are scattered everywhere." When the waiter returned he said, "Sir, no Chinese Jews." "Are you really sure?" Al asked again. "I cannot believe there are no Chinese Jews." "Sir, I ask everyone," the waiter replied exasperated. "We have orange jews, prune jews, tomato jews and grape jews, but no one ever hear of Chinese jews!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a rabbit who tells jokes? A FUNNY BUNNY!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has 2 jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl''s place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes of his trousers and washes his hands again. The girl has been watching him and says, "You must be a dentist." The guy, surprised, says "Yes....how did you figure that out?" "Easy," she replied, "you keep washing your hands." One thing led to another and they make love. After they were done, the girl says, "You must be a good dentist." The guy, now with a boosted ego says, "Sure, I''m a good dentist, How did you figure that out?" "Didn''t feel a thing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In biology class the teacher asks, "Can anyone tell me why a flounder is flat?" Little Johnny raises his hand. "Go ahead, Little Johnny." "My uncle told me it''s because a whale raped the flounder." "That''s terrible, Little Johnny. I''ll have to speak to your parents about this. Let''s try another one. Why does a lobster''s eyes protrude from its head?" Again Little Johnny raises his hand. "We''ll give you another chance." "My uncle said when the whale raped the flounder, the lobster saw it, and his eyes popped out in shock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly Wal-Mart greeters were sitting on a bench during break time and one turns to the other saying, "Slim, I''m 73 years old and I''m just full of aches and pains. I know you''re about my age; how do you feel?" Slim says, "I feel just like a new born babe." Rather amazed at this reply, Slim''s co-worker repeats his statement back in the form of a question, "Really? A new born babe?" "Yup," grins Slim, "No teeth, no hair and I think I just wet my pants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer purchases an old, run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields are grown over with weeds, the farmhouse is falling apart, and the fences are collapsing all around. During his first day of work, the town preacher stops by to bless the man''s work, saying, "May you and God work together to make this the farm of your dreams!" A few months later, the preacher stops by again to call on the farmer. Lo and behold, it''s like a completely different place -- the farm house is completely rebuilt and in excellent condition, there are plenty of cattle and other livestock happily munching on feed in well-fenced pens, and the fields are filled with crops planted in neat rows. "Amazing!" the preacher says. "Look what God and you have accomplished together!" "Yes, Reverend," says the farmer, "but remember what the farm was like when God was working it alone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What do you call a 300-pound stripper? A:broke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Have you heard of the dyslexic cow who attained enlightenment? A. It kept on repeating OOOOMMM!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why didn''t Cain please God? A: Because he just wasn''t Able.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sophisticated lady went into an expensive restaurant. Before sitting, she asked her waiter, "Do you serve crabs here, sir?" The waiter replied, "Yes ma''am, we serve anybody in here. Please have a seat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were sitting enjoying a view of the full moon. The first blonde says; "I wonder which is further away? The moon or Florida?" The second blonde replies; "Well, duh! The moon! Can you see Florida?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two English guys were in the middle of the scorching desert with no food or water. They both decide to stop and have a rest in the sand. Then one guy has a genius idea. The guy says, "I support Liverpool football team, so I''ll eat the liver of my camel!" The second guys says, "I support Arsenal football club, but I''m not that hungry!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My survey which I conducted said that 8 out of 4 people don''t understand fractions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Who! Who who? You must have the stammers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ugly: (adjective) A state of being in which you are constantly in. Example: You', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, her bungee cord has to be hooked onto Mars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she makes Godzilla look like a pocket dragon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she''s the founder of Button Poppers Anonymous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she has to iron her clothes on the street.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two fat guys in a bar, one of the guys, puts his empty glass on the bar and says, "your round", the other guy says, "so are you, you fat basted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A South African, an Australian and an Englishman are all drinking in a bar. Suddenly, the South African downs the remainder of his drink, tosses his glass in the air, draws his pistol and shoots the glass. "In South Africa our glasses are so cheap that we don''t need to drink from the same ones twice," he says proudly. The Australian, who is obviously impressed by this, downs his drink, tosses his glass, draws his gun and shoots the glass. "In Australia we''ve got so much sand to make glasses that we don''t need to drink from the same ones twice," he says. The Englishman pauses to give this some thought, then downs his drink, casually tosses his glass into the air, draws his gun, and shoots the South African and the Australian. "In England we have so many South Africans and Australians that we don''t need to drink with the same ones twice," he says.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama''s so old, she farted and dust came out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama''s so ugly, she stuck her face out the window and cops pulled her over for mooning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she put on a red coat, walked outside, and everyone started yelling, "Kool-Aid, Kool-Aid"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy took his girlfriend to the movies. During the pre-views, she asked him if he would go and buy her some M & Ms. When he returned with her candy, she opened the bag, picked out all the brown ones and threw them away. "What did you do that for?" he asked her. "I''m allergic to chocolate!" she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jerry: So you have both a nice mommy and a pretty mommy? Steve: Yup. They''re lesbians.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey! I recognize you! You''re the third one over on the evolutionary scale!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why should you be careful when it''s raining cats and dogs? A. Because you might step in a poodle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If brains were fuel, you wouldn''t have enough to power an ant''s motorcycle around the edge of a penny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the zombie cross the road? Because he didn''t have the guts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat when she stepped on the scale she said, "Wow, that''s my phone number!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, when she stepped on a dollar she made change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she has more rolls than the bakery shop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two blondes sitting on the roof of a house. The ladder they had used to get on the roof fell down onto the ground. Blonde #1: Go get the ladder! Blonde #2: No way! If I jump down, I''ll kill myself. Blonde #1: I know! I''ll shine my flashlight down to the ground and you can climb down the beam of light. Blonde #2: No way! You''ll just turn off the flashlight when I''m halfway down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there ? Scold Scold who ? Scold out here, let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mormon acquaintance once pushed Mark Twain into an argument on the issue of polygamy. After long and tedious expositions justifying the practice, the Mormon demanded that Twain cite any passage of scripture expressly forbidding polygamy. "Nothing easier," Twain replied. "No man can serve two masters."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call frozen blonds? Frosted Flakes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman stranded on an island. They see a cave up ahead. The Englishman goes in and sees some toast on a rock. He goes over to it but then a voice comes. "Dont eat the toast," the voice shouts. The Englishman runs out. The Scotsman walks in and sees the toast as well, the voice comes back. "Don''t eat the toast." The Scotsman thinks it''s his imagination but then he hears it again, "Don''t eat the toast," says the voice,the Scotsman runs out. The Irishman wondering what''s going on, goes inside. He hears the voice once, thinks nothing of it. He hears the voice again, still he ignores it. He picks up the toast and eats it. The voice shouts, "I warned you once, I warned you twice, I wiped my arse upon the slice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Noah: "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head" Adam and Eve: "Strangers in Paradise" Lazarus: "The Second Time Around" Esther: "I Feel Pretty" Job: "I''ve Got a Right to Sing the Blues" Moses: "The Wanderer" Jezebel: "The Lady is a Tramp" Samson: "Hair" Salome: "I Could Have Danced All Night" Daniel: "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" Esau: "Born To Be Wild" Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego: "Great Balls of Fire!" The Three Kings: "When You Wish Upon a Star" Jonah: "Got a Whale of a Tale" Elijah: "Up, Up, and Away" Methuselah: "Stayin'' Alive" Nebuchadnezzar: "Crazy"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A preacher finished the service one morning by saying, "Next Sunday, I am going to preach on the subject of liars. As a preparation for my sermon, I would like you all to read Mark 17." On the following Sunday, the preacher rose to begin. Looking out at the congregation he said, "Last week I asked you all to read Mark 17. If you have read the chapter, please raise your hand." Nearly every hand in the congregation went up. Smiling, the preacher said, "You are the very people I want to talk to. Mark has only 16 chapters."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tour bus driver drives with a bus full of seniors down a highway, when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. After approx.15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another handful of peanuts. She repeats this gesture about eight times. At the ninth time he asks the little old lady why they do not eat the peanuts themselves, whereupon she replies that it is not possible because of their old teeth, they are not able to chew them. "Why do you buy them then?" he asks puzzled. The old lady answers, "We just love the chocolate around them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible: Psalm 23. She gave the youngsters a month to learn the verse. Little Bobby was excited about the task, but he just couldn''t remember the Psalm. After much practice, he could barely get past the first line. On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Bobby was so nervous. When it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my shepherd and that''s all I need to know."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?" One child blurted out, "Aces!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?" "No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot''s wife looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Johnny interrupted, "My Mummy looked back once, while she was DRIVING," he announced triumphantly, "and she turned into a telephone pole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde rings up an airline. She asks, "How long are your flights from America to England?" The woman on the other end of the phone says, "Just a minute..." The blonde says, "Thanks!" and hangs up the phone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb she thought a quarterback was a refund!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Bonnie became restless as the preacher''s sermon dragged on and on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Feeling edgy, a woman took a hot bath. Just as she got comfortable, the doorbell rang. She got out, wrapped herself in a towel, and went to the door. A salesman wanted to know if she needed any brushes. She slammed the door in his face and returned to her bath. The doorbell rang again. She got out, wrapped herself in a towel, slipped on a wet spot, and hit her back against the tub. She struggled into her street clothes and, with every move a stab of pain, drove to the doctor. After examining her, the doctor said, "Nothing''s broken. But you need to relax. Why don''t you just go home and take a nice hot bath?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was looking at this parked, motorized wheelchair once, and I noticed that it had a dial on it to control it''s speed. At one end there was a turtle, and at the other end there was a rabbit. I just assumed at first that the turtle was representing the slower speed, and that the rabbit was for the faster speed, but then I remembered who won when those two animals raced. I think that it would be cool if cars used this same system too. You know, you get pulled over by a police officer and he says to you "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you were speeding? We had you clocked on our radar at going ''Rabbit'' and I''m sure that you know the posted speed limit here is only ''Raccoon''. Now we''ll just let you off with a warning this time since you were only going a ''hare'' over the speed limit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Uh huh, "sure, honey," or "yes, dear" Translated: Absolutely nothing. It''s a conditioned response. "It would take too long to explain" Translated: "I have no idea how it works." "I was listening to you. It''s just that I have things on my mind." Translated: "That girl standing on the corner is a real babe." "Take a break honey, you''re working too hard." Translated: "I can''t hear the game over the vacuum cleaner." "That''s interesting, dear." Translated: "Are you still talking?" "I can''t find it." Translated: "It didn''t fall into my outstretched hands, so I''m completely clueless." "What did I do this time?" Translated: "What did you catch me at?" "You look terrific." Translated: "Oh, please don''t try on one more outfit, I''m starving." "I''m not lost. I know exactly where we are." Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it so hard to make a blond snowman??? Because you have to hollow out its head!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A handsome mid-age couple, John and Gail, like living in Texas. Even though they have lived in Texas most of their married life John never had a pair of authentic cowboy boots. Seeing some on sale at Sheplers one day, he buys them, wears them home, walking proudly. He walks into the house and says to his wife: "Notice anything different about me?" Gail looks him over, "Nope." Frustrated John storms off in to the bathroom, undresses, and walks back into the room completely naked except for the boots. Again, he asks, a little louder this time, "Notice anything DIFFERENT NOW?" Gail looks up and says, "John, what''s different? It''s hanging down today it was hanging down yesterday, it''ll be hanging down again tomorrow. Furious, John yells, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT IS HANGING DOWN, GAIL? IT''S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT''S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!!" To which Gail replies, "Shoulda bought a hat, John. Shoulda bought a hat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double-pane energy efficient kind. But this week I got a call from the contractor complaining that his work had been completed a whole year ago and I had yet to pay for them. Boy oh boy, did we go around! Just because I''m blonde doesn''t mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I proceeded to tell him just what his fast-talking sales guy had told me last year... that in one year the windows would pay for themselves. There was silence on the other end of the line so I just hung up and I haven''t heard back. Guess I must have won that silly argument!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men die and go to hell. There is a white guy, a Polish guy, and a black guy. The devil makes a deal with the three men. He tells them if they can stand on his hand for 10 days without melting he will give them their lives back. So the three men agree to the deal and stand on his hand. After only 2 days the white guy melts and after the 4th day the Polish guy melts also. The devil thinks this is going to be a piece of cake. "Two down and one to go", he tells the black man. But after 10 days the black man is still standing strong. The devil asks him how this is possible and the man replies, "Chocolate melts in your mouth not in your hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black person that wants to be and acts just like Jackie Chan? Blackie Chan', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walked into the pet store and, after looking up and down the aisles, asked the sales clerk for help. "I''d like a box of birdseed," said the lady. "For which kind of bird?" he asked helpfully. "Oh, I dunno," she replied. "Whichever will grow the fastest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde pulls over at the gas station, gets out of her car, opens the hood, and checks the engine oil. After a few seconds of intelligent thinking, she takes the dipstick in her hand and, raising her chest high, walks up to the attendant. "Excuse me sir, but can I buy a longer dipstick?" "May I ask why you need a longer one ma''am?" "Because this one isn''t long enough to reach the oil!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While shopping at the grocery store, I noticed that the tuna packed in spring water was labeled dolphin safe, but the tuna packed in oil was not. I mentioned this fact to the blonde cashier and mused out loud, "I wonder why?" The blonde replied, "Must be because the oil would suffocate them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A proud elderly gentleman was in the hospital for a series of tests because his bodily functions were extremely disrupted. During the night he made several trips to the bathroom because he thought he had to go to the bathroom. After failing to go several times he finally decided to just ignore it. When he awoke later in the night he found his bed full of diarrhea. Being too proud to admit he just relieved himself in his own bed he carefully took the sheets and tossed them out the window. However, while this was going on, a drunk was stumbling home in the darkness. Before he can figure out what''s happening, the soiled sheets come down on him. He kicks and punches the sheets trying to get them off of him. A security guard runs up and asks what the heck is going on. The drunk replies, "I don''t know what happened, but I think I just beat the crap out of a ghost."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was riding in a cab one day when he decided to tap the cab driver on the shoulder to request an alternate route. The cab driver screams his head off and loses control of the cab, causing it to slam into a lightpost. After checking themselves out the man says, "I''m sorry. I didn''t know you were so jumpy." To which the cab driver replies, "It''s not your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver after driving a hearse for 10 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear _______________, I really like you. I was wondering if you would like to go out with me. Please check one of the boxes below: ___ Yes ___ No ___ No, I already have a girlfriend, sorry ___ Yes, if you don''t tell my girlfriend ___ No, I am already fathering a child ___ No, I''m gay Love, ______________ *written by clueless_chic*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what would have happened if there had been three wise WOMEN instead of three wise MEN, don''t you? The three wise WOMEN would have asked for directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the Baby, cleaned the stable, made a casserole, and given practical gifts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were 3 ants in a house. They all had to decide where they wanted to sleep. One ant decides to sleep in the cabinet, one in the cookie jar, and one in the toilet. The next morning they all woke up and meet on the stove top to ask each other how their sleep was. The one who slept in the cabinet said his was hot. The one who slept in the cookie jar said his was sweet! The one that slept in the toilet said that " First it got dark, then it rained, a big gust of wind came, and if it wasn''t for that big log.....I would have drowned!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Russians were called "Reds," a long while ago. So a war general named Rudolf walks into a bakery. The baker starts talking about owning a reindeer. He starts asking questions about it to the general. When the baker gets home, he tells his wife, "Rudolf the Red knows reindeer!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the teacher have to put on her glasses during class? Because the kids were to bright!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t crabs share? Because there shelfish!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the name of the baseball player who sits under a tree? Babe Root!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend of mine spent two hours in the salon getting her hair colored, cut, and blow dried. After all that, was it too much to ask to be treated like Cinderella at the ball? Yet when she went to the desk to pay, the receptionist said to her, "Hello, madam, who is your appointment with today?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many roaches does it take to screw in a lightbulb? You''ll never know because when you turn on the light, they scatter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Sara. Sara who? Sara doctor in the house?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are four elephants in a Volkswagon. How do you know when one went into your refrigerator? Answer: There is a set of footprints in the butter! How do you know when there were two elephants in the fridge? Answer: There are two sets of footprints in the butter! How do you know when there were three elephants in your fridge? Answer: you have three sets of footprints in the butter! How do you know when four elephants were in your fridge? Answer: You have an empty Volkswagon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a bar... and it hurt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were going on a hike, and came to a fork in the road. A sign was in the center that said "Bear left." One of the blondes said,"I''m happy that was taken care of, now we finally are able to take the upper trail," so they proceeded left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A College football team was on a winning streak, until they found out that their star QB was failing English. The QB couldn''t play until he brought his grade up to a C. The other players on the team were desperate for him to play in the championship, so they asked his English professor for extra credit. He agreed and called in the QB. The professor said: "I will give you a simple spelling test and if you pass, I will raise your grade. In fact if you get one word right, I will raise the grade." So the QB takes the test and gets every single word wrong. He begged the professor for one more chance. The professor agreed and told him that if he could get one letter in the word that was given to him right, he would have a C in English. The word was coffee. The football player responded, "This is easy, kauphy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Michael Jackson dating twenty-eight year olds? The answer is: Because there''s twenty of them! (twenty eight year olds....)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Tarzan''s favorite Christmas song? Jungle Bells!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the turtle do in the Olympics? The hurdle run!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five days before Christmas, Santa was having a horrible day. And by horrible, I mean his wife was sick with the flu, 23 elfs called in sick, and nothing was getting done, so they were really behind schedule. *Knock-Knock,* Santa heard, so he went to go open the door. There was an Angel carrying a christmas tree. "Where would you like me to put this?" asked the angel. And that is why the Angel is put on top of the Christmas tree.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Michael Jacksons does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Answer: One, but 500 children to hold the ladder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the elephant call the locksmith? Because he lost his keys in his trunk!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do turtles talk to each other? Shellphones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get a mouse to smile? Say Cheese!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch a cold!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cop say to the bad popcicle? Freeze!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t G-Unit take the bus? They only had 50 cent!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a vampire''s favorite holiday? Fangs-giving!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sven and Ole are visiting a relative in Texas. While walking along the street, they see a sign on a store front which reads: Suits $5.00 each Shirts $2.00 each Trousers $2.50 per pair Sven says to his pal, "Hey Ole! We could buy a whole lot of dem and ven ve get back to Minnesota, ve could sell them and make a fortune." "Now ven ve go into the shop, yust let me do all da talkin'' cause if dey hear your Minnesota accent dey might tink ve are dumb Norwegians and try ta raise da price - but I can speak with a perfect Texas drawl." They go in, and Sven drawls out an order of 50 suits at $5.00 each, 100 shirts at $2.00 each and 50 pair of trousers at $2.50 each. The owner of the shop says "You''re Norwegians from Minnesota, aren''t you?" "Uff da!" says a surprised Sven. "How''d you know dat?" The owner says, "Because this is a dry-cleaners."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Monday morning, a mailman was walking through the neighborhood on his usual route. As he approached one of the homes, Bob, a homeowner, was coming out with a load of empty beer and liquor bottles. "Wow, Bob, looks like you guys had a hell of a party this weekend," the mailman commented. Bob replied, "We had about 15 couples from around the neighborhood over and things got a bit wild. We got so drunk that we started playing ''Who Am I?''" "How do you play that?" the mailman asked. Bob continued, "Well, all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with a sheet covering us, with only our units showing through a hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is." The mailman laughed and said, "I''m sorry I missed that." "Probably a good thing you did," Bob responded, "Your name was guessed four or five times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? A: So she wouldn''t wake up the sleeping pills.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the cat say to the other cat on the phone? Can you hear me-ow?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wee Hughie came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting for him. "What''s the story this time, Hughie?" he asked sarcastically. "Let''s hear a good excuse for a change." Wee Hughie sighed, "Everything went wrong this morning. The wife decided to drive me to the harbour. She got ready in ten minutes, but then the ferry didn''t turn up. Rather than let you down, I swam across the river, ran over the mountain, borrowed a bicycle and cycled the 20 miles through the glen to this office." "You''ll have to do better than that. Hughie," said his boss, disappointed. "No woman can be ready in ten minutes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco. Pastor Mike was looking at the nativity scene outside when he noticed the baby Jesus was missing from the figures. Immediately, Pastor Mike turned towards the church to call the police. But as he was about to do so, he saw little Jimmy with a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the little infant, Jesus. Pastor Mike walked up to Jimmy and said, "Well, Jimmy, where did you get the little infant?" Jimmy replied, "I got him from the church." "And why did you take him?" With a sheepish smile, Jimmy said, "Well, about a week before Christmas I prayed to little Lord Jesus. I told him if he would bring me a red wagon for Christmas, I would give him a ride around the block in it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which sea will make you go ape? The Chimpansea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you invited all the alphabet to tea who would be late? The letters ''UVWXYZ'' because they all come after ''T''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an alien with no ears? Anything you like, he can''t hear you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a horse that escaped from jail? A Zebra.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a cat''s favourite exercise? Puss-Ups!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a fish and a grizzly? A Bearacuda.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do psychics ask so many questions when they supposedly already know the answers?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone has a photographic memory, you just don''t have any film.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All believers in telekinesis raise my hand!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I couldn''t fix your brakes, so instead I made your horn louder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are in an elevator when a good-looking man enters. They notice that, though he is very handsome, he has very bad dandruff. He gets off at his floor, and when the doors close, the brunette looks at the blond and says, "Someone needs to give him some Head and Shoulders". The blonde replies, "How do you give someone shoulders?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your brain was chocolate it wouldn''t fill an M&M', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wear tank tops and support your right to bare arms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Strategic responses to the ever-dangerous "Do I look Fat" question: "No, not to Stevie Wonder." "No babe, you''re not fat, you''re fluffy." "Does this tie make me look stupid?" "No hablo ingles." "If I answer that question, my life will be in danger." "Let me jog around to your front and take a look." "No, honey. But just to be safe, steer clear of one-legged sea captains." "May I consult a lawyer before answering that?" "Look at your belt size honey, if it says ''equator'' on the tag you know the answer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Micheal Jackson and a PS2 have in common? They''re both plastic, can be black or white and can be turned on by children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Avon Lady, your door bell is broken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three girls and a genie on a mountain. There was a redhead, a brunette and a blonde. The only one who knew how to get off the mountain was the genie, but she offered the girls a wish to turn into birds and fly off. "I want to be a blue jay so I can showoff my blue color in the sun." the redhead said to the genie. POOF! The bluejay landed off the mountain safely. "I want to be a cardinal so I can go visit my friends in St. Louis." the brunette said. POOF! The cardinal landed safely off the mountain, too. Then the blonde shouted "I want to be cuter than a bluejay and a cardinal! I want to be a penguin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat people jog around her instead of the block, for a LONGER run!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1st SLAP "Our ship has just lost 82% of its power, our captain''s head fused with plexiglass and we have an eleven minute window to escape certain death. Let''s go to bed together." 2nd SLAP "The evil bad guy, who has demonstrated Superman-like strength, has just killed two of our crew. Let''s split up and walk aimlessly through the ship looking for him." 3rd SLAP "I just found an unknown, odd, bizarrely pulsating alien object. I''m gonna open it up and stick my hand in it to see what happens." 4th SLAP "We just picked you up from an abandoned moon in deep space and you can read my mind, which no other human being has ever been able to do. Neat. Let''s go to bed." 5th SLAP "We are a medical rescue ship with a crew of six with only six ''jump pods'' so if we ever actually rescued anyone, we wouldn''t be able to actually bring them home." SLAP!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife, Susie, a cell phone for their first anniversary. Susie was excited about the phone and the next day, while shopping, it rang and to her surprise, it was her husband. "Hi, Susie," he said. "How do you like your new phone?" Susie replied, "I just love it! It''s so small and your voice is clear as a bell, but there''s one thing I don''t understand ..." "What''s that, sweetie?" asked her husband. "How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign posted at a golf club in Scottsdale, Arizona 1. Back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart. 2. Form a loose grip. 3. Keep your head down. 4. Avoid a quick back swing. 5. Stay out of the water. 6. Try not to hit anyone. 7. If you are taking too long, please let others go ahead of you. 8. Don''t stand directly in front of others. 9. Quiet please...while others are preparing to go. 10. Don''t take extra strokes. Well done - Now flush the urinal, go outside, and tee off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish man walks out of a bar..............Hey, It could happen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day in heaven, George Bush saw Moses & walked up to him. When he tried to say hi Moses ran off. The next day George Bush saw Moses again. He then tried to say hi, but he sped off again. The next day when George Bush saw Moses he asked him. " How come every time i try to say hi to you, you run off?" Moses replied," Last time I saw a bush, I was stuck in the desert for 40 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear some rich guy wants to build a tavern at the top of Mount Everest. Talk about raising the bar high!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class was squirming around, scratching his crotch, and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed, and whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy. The teacher told him to go down to the principal''s office. He was to telephone his mother and ask her what he should do about it. He did as he was told and returned to his class. Suddenly, there was a commotion at the back of the room. She went back to investigate, only to find him sitting at his desk, with his penis hanging out. "I thought I told you to call your mom!" she said. "I did," he said, "And she told me that if I could stick it out till noon, she''d come and pick me up from school." KIDS, DON''T YOU JUST LOVE THEM???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cows Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington, and they can track her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don''t we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it''s worked for over 200 years and we''re not using it anymore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The real reason that we can''t have the Ten Commandments in a Courthouse: You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery" and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('how many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2, but I don''t know how they got in there!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little guy is seated next to a big guy at a bar and asks his name. The big guy says, "They call me Tex." The little guy replies, "Oh, you must be from Texas." The big guy says, "Nope. I''m from Louisiana." "Hmmm," the little guy replies, "Then why do they call you Tex?" The big guy looks down at him and says, "Would you like to try calling me Louise?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Keep your lights blinking for a whole hour. 2.Go really slow on a highway. 3.Smile and wave at everyone that you see at a stoplight. 4.Turn your radio up while playing opera music. 5.When stopping at a stop sign run out of your car and look to see if any cars are coming then yell, "It''s all clear!" 6.When coming to a speed bump, get out and say "My car won''t make it!" then try to push it over the bump. 7.At every stoplight, run out and check your tires and yell, "Don''t worry it''s OK!" 8.Take a sponge and a bucket of water and pull over to wash the bugs off the car every time you see one. 9.Fill the back seats with plastic bags, put the windows down, and drive around really fast. 10.Change your licence plate every you stop and yell, "They''re after me! Anybody got a screwdriver?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat, the last time you went on a bus, the ticket read ''''Please allow up to 28 days for delivery.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your cooking is so bad, the homeless give it back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The temporary Sunday School teacher was struggling to open a combination lock on the supply cabinet. She had been told the combination, but couldn''t quite remember it. She went to the pastor''s study and asked for help. The pastor came into the room and began to turn the dial. After the first two numbers he paused and stared blankly for a moment. Finally he looked serenely heavenward and his lips moved silently. Then he looked back at the lock, and quickly turned to the final number, and opened the lock. The teacher was amazed. "I''m in awe at your faith, pastor," she said. "It''s really nothing," he answered. "The number is on a piece of tape on the ceiling."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the blonde cheer? I''m blonde, I''m blonde,I''m B.L.O.N.....uh,oh well...I''m blonde, I''m blonde,I''m... yeah, yeah,yeah...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blond name his pet zebra? Spot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? A: "What''s a lightbulb?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between pokemon and pokewomon? poke balls', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas so old that when she was in school they didn''t have history.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with the letter F and ends in UCK? FiretrUCK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t Osama sleep with any of his 5 wives? Because all he sees is bush.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there Jack Jack Who I don''t know any jack', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('5 boys are walking by a "haunted" house" One of the five boys said, "I bet I could go in there for more than five minutes." A couple minutes later, he comes out screaming "GHOST!" The second boy decides to try to go in for more than ten minutes. He comes out screaming after four minutes, "HE WASN''T LYING! GHOST!" The third and fourth boy go in together and try to stay in for more than an hour. They come out screaming the same thing. The last boy walks and says he can stay in there a whole day. Once he walked in, the other boys heard him say, "Hi Grandma."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the lightbulb fail his test? He wasnt bright enough!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a cow do for entertainment? Listen to moo-sic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, "Surely I can''t look that old"? Well, here is some karma for that. I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his DDS diploma, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 40-odd years ago. Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was WAY too old to have been my classmate. After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Lawton Senior High School. "Yes. Yes, I did. I''m a Wolverine." he gleamed with pride. "When did you graduate?" I asked. He answered, "In 1961. Why do you ask?" "You were in my class!" I exclaimed. He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly, old, wrinkled son-of-a-b*tch asked, "What did you teach?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is such a redneck, when I look at her family tree, it goes straight up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a flying skunk? A smell-icopter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she sat on a gamecube and made it into a gameboy advance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so fat, she sat down in Wal-mart and lowered the prices.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an elephant with Darth Vador? An elevator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your a redneck when there are 15 cars in your driveway, and the only one that moves is your house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, I asked her what was for dinner and she put her foot on the table and said "CORN!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat when she sees a school bus go by, she says "STOP THAT TWINKY!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck when you go to a family reunion to find a girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck when you mow your lawn and find 10 cars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so fat, she jumped up and got stuck in the sky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid she threw butter out the window to see a butterfly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your uncle Jack was stuck on a roof, would you help your uncle Jack off?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went into my proctologist''s office for my first rectal exam. His new nurse, Elaine, took me to an examining room and told me to get undressed and have a seat until the doctor could see me. She said that he would only be a few minutes. After putting on the gown that she gave me I sat down. While waiting I observed that there were three items on a stand next to the exam table: a tube of K-Y jelly, a rubber glove, and a beer. When the doctor finally came in I said, "Look Doc, I''m a little confused. This is my first exam. I know what the K-Y is for, and I know what the glove is for, but can you tell me what the BEER is for?" At that Doctor Paul became noticeably outraged and stormed over to the door. He flung the door open and yelled to his nurse....... "Darn it ELAINE!!!!!!!!!!! I said a BUTT LIGHT"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and how the letters are used to define bra sizes? If you have wondered why, but couldn''t figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed! {A} Almost Boobs . . . {B} Barely there. {C} Can''t Complain! {D} Dang! {DD} Double dang! {E} Enormous! {F} Fake. {G} Get a Reduction. {H} Help me, I''ve fallen and I can''t get up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a schizophrenic Buddhist? A: Someone who is at two with the universe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there? Mayonaise Mayonaise who? Mayonaise a lot of jokes on this website.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a drunk and a druggie? Drunks run a stop sign and druggies stop at it and wait till it turns green.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shannon received a phone call from the foreman plant that her husband worked at. He sounded grim and she immediately knew something was wrong. "What happened? Is Patrick all right? Please tell me he''s ok," she said. The man on the line said, "Shannon, there was an accident at the brewery and your husband is . . . dead." "Oh my goodness, what happened?" Shannon asked. The foreman replied, "He fell into a vat of beer." "Did he at least die quickly?" sobbed Shannon. The man paused, then said, "Well, no . . . he got out three times to use the bathroom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He knew how to swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting an old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted, "Are there any alligators around here?" The beachcomber shouted back, "Nah! We ain''t seen gators in these parts for years." Feeling safe, the tourist began swimming leisurely towards the shore. About halfway there, he shouted, "Hey, how''d you get rid of the alligators?" The beachcomber said, "We didn''t do anything. The sharks got ''em."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did baby corn say to mama corn? A: Where''s pop corn?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid you got locked in an open convertibale car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat. She has more ass than a donkey farm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb she took back the donut because it had a hole in it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don''t know. They can''t get the dead one out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some items have the strangest directions/ warnings. Here are a few I''ve noticed. On a toilet plunger: Do not use as an umbrella. On a carton of milk: May contain dairy products. On a tricycle: Will hurt if on top of someone. On popcorn: Will pop if heated. On candy: Directions: Take of wrapper, insert into mouth, chew, and swallow. (No, really?) On bean bags used for juggling: Do not eat. On lunchmeat: Do not mistake as toilet paper. On Gameboy: To play,you must have a thumb. After computer error: Keyboard malfunction, press enter to continue. On coke bottle: Do not try to insert head. On skateboard: May move if rode on. On shampoo bottle: Warning: May create a lather. Roadsign: Warning: Unfinished bridge 3 miles. *3 miles later* We told you there was an unfinished bridge!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit ? A: The bucket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dog is a man''s best friend because it gives no advice, never tries to borrow money, and has no in-laws.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With so much turmoil in the world, God decided to pay a visit to earth to check things out. He strolled into a bar and approached the first man he saw. "If you believe in me enough to give me $50," he said, "I will grant you eternal life." "Sorry, I''m an atheist," the fellow replied, "and have never believed in God." God walked up to another man and made the same offer. "Well, I''m an agnostic and not really sure if I believe in you or not," the guy said, "but here''s 50 bucks, just in case." As the Lord turned away, a third man ran up to him. "I''m Pat Robertson and don''t really care if you''re God or not," he said excitedly. "Just teach me the trick you did with the agnostic and I''ll give you $100."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly that you scared away a man-eating shark!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A collector of rare books ran into an acquaintance who told him he had just thrown away an old bible that he found in a dusty, old box. He happened to mention that Guten-somebody-or-other had printed it. "Not Gutenberg?" gasped the collector. "Yes, that was it!" "You idiot! You''ve thrown away one of the first books ever printed. A copy recently sold at an auction for half a million dollars!" "Oh, I don''t think this book would have been worth anything close to that much," replied the man. "It was scribbled all over in the margins by some guy named Martin Luther."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, you can see her from space.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Orange Orange who Orange you tired of hearing the same stupid jokes about oranges?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a woman who came home from work. She had a very long day and just wanted to relax. Just as she was about to sit down, the phone rang. "Hello?" she said as she picked it up. "Are you married?" the voice said. "Who is this?" she asked. No answer. She hung up the phone. Just as she was about to sit down again, the phone rang. "Hello?" she said, picking up the phone again. "Do you have children?" the voice said. "Who the crap is this?" she said No answer. She hung up the phone. Just as she was about to sit down AGAIN, the phone rang AGAIN. "HELLO?!?!?!" she yelled, "Now this is it, if you don''t tell me who you are, I am going to call the police!" "Ma''am you seem frustrated, why don''t you do yourself a favor and join GEICO Insurance where we strive to make your life easier."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Chinese guy was trying to exchange yen for dollars and asked the teller, "Why it change, yestoday I get two hunat dollar fo yen - today Iget a Hunat eighty?" The teller says - "Fluctuations!" The Chinese guy says "Fluc you white guys too"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a stay-over in another city, so upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day''s route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened to her. She answered the phone, sobbing, and said she couldn''t get out of her room. "You can''t get out of your room?" the captaind asked, "Why not?" The stewardess replied, "There are only three doors in here," she cried, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says "Do Not Disturb"!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('+ You dance and it makes the band skip. + You are diagnosed with the flesh eating virus, and the doctor gives you 22 more years to live. + You go to the zoo and the elephants throw you peanuts. + Your driver''s license says, "Picture continued on other sid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy walks into a bar, sits down and asks the bartender,"Got any specials today?" The bartender replies, "Yes, as amatter of fact, we have a new drink that was invented by a gynecologist who is a patron of ours. It''s a mixof Pabst Blue Ribbon beer and Smirnoff vodka." The guyasks, "Geez, what kind of drink is that?" The bartender responds, "We call it a Pabst Smir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They like to keep their clients in the dark!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so slow that if you were a train engine, the caboose would be leading.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the pencil cross the road? It was lead!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are these kids at school, each bragging about how they ruined something in an amount of time. 1st kid: I wore out a pair of shoes in 1 month. 2nd kid: I wore out a pair of jeans in 1 week. 3rd kid: Oh that''s nothing, I wore out my babysitter in 5 minutes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Can you pay a little attention to this lesson?! Pupil: I am trying my best to pay as little attention as I can!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went into a restaurant that served ''breakfast at any time''. So, I asked for French Toast in the time of the Renaissance', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about all the Wal-Marts being taken out of Afghanistan? Yeah thet''re putting in Targets!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asks a first grader a simple math question. TEACHER:" If you had 50 cents in one pocket, and you asked you dad for another 50 cents, how much would you have?" STUDENT:"50 cents." TEACHER: "You obviously don''t know how to add." STUDENT: "You obviously don''t know my dad!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are frogs so happy? A: They eat whatever bugs them!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Depends on how many lightbulbs need changing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say the word pig before each word. Pigs About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look Now say the word pig after each word Pigs About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look Next say the word pig before and after each word Pigs About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look Finally read the list of words from the bottom up. Pigs About Talking Idiot This Got I Long How Look Have a Great day :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What happens when two frogs collide? A: They get tongue tied Q: How does a frog feel when he has a broken leg? A: Unhoppy Q: What happens when you mix a frog with a bathtub scrubby-mit? A: A rubbit Q: Why did the frog read Sherlock Holmes? A: He liked a good croak and dagger Q: What happened to the frog''s car when his parking permit expired? A: It got toad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do blondes wear big hoop earrings when they go on a date? So they have some place to put their feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your breath is so bad, you need a tic-tac the size of a watermelon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One mistake my mom made when I was three: she taught me how to read the word napkin. The second mistake she made: I asked her why "napkins" were under the sink. She said they were for "special occasions" The third mistake she made: My mom asked me to set the table for the special occasion tonight. So I went to the bathroom and got the "napkins" for special ocassions, and set them on the table. When I got done, my dad came in and burst out in laughter, along with my uncle and aunt as they walked in. When my mom came in, her face turned bright red.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a women who bought a new house but didn''t know what to name it. So she stuck her head out the window and heard Hairy Butt! So she decided to name the house Hairy Butt. Then sometime later she had a baby boy but didn''t know what to name it, so she stuck her head out the window and heard the word Crack, so she named her son Crack. The next day she lost her son so she called the police and said "Help! I looked all over my Hairy Butt but I can''t find my little Crack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat, when you were born, you came out singin'' "It''s a small world after all."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the chicken say after it crossed the road? A: "Why is everyone always talking about me?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the rooster cross the road? A: To prove he wasn''t chicken. Q: Why did the pencil cross the road? A: It was lead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat and hairy, that if she dyed her hair green, people would use her for golf practice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a couple. One day the husband went to work, as usual. All of a sudden a man in a truck appeared at the front door. The husband, frightened, hid behind a tree. The man exchanged a few words with the wife and left. The husband decided to get rid of that man once and for all. The next day, the husband went to work. But this time, he carried a shotgun with him. The man in the truck came again, the husband shot the man. Then the wife came out and cried," You idiot! That man was filling in for my boyfriend!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child: Mom! I got a 100% on my homework! Mom: Really? On what subject? Child: A 40% on science and a 60% on spelling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so dumb she can''t get the ball to touch the ground.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to break up a dating couple: Knock-knock. Who''s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I dumped your girlfriend last night?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a party, a man came up to a stranger and asked "Have you heard the latest Bush joke?" The man replies, "I am Bush." The man said, "Oh. I''ll tell it slowly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Bush was visiting a classroom where a teacher was giving a lesson on blood circulation. Trying to make the lesson clearer, he said, "Now, children, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run to my face." "Yes, sir," one of the girls said. "Then why is it," he continued, "that while I am standing upright the blood doesn''t run to my feet?" "Because your feet aren''t empty," replied a boy in the back of the room.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid, you threw a rock at the ground and missed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Bush looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approaching him. "What is it now?" sighs the president. "It''s this abortion bill," replies the aide. "What do you want to do about it?" "Go ahead and pay it," says the president.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher in California asked her class, "How many of you are Republicans?" Everyone in the class raised their hands except for one girl. "Mary," the teacher inquired, "Why didn''t you raise your hand?" "Because I''m not a Republican," she replied. "I''m a Democrat." The teacher asked her, "Why are you a Democrat?" And Mary said, "Well, my mother and my father are both Democrats, so I''m a Democrat, too." "Well," said the teacher in an annoyed tone, "That''s no reason why you have to be a Democrat. You don''t always have to be like your parents. What if your parents were both criminals?" "Then," Mary said, "We''d be Republicans."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George Bush senior and junior were dragging the deer they had just shot back to their truck. Another hunter approached, pulling his along, too. "Sirs, I don''t want to tell you how to do something," he said, "but I can tell you that it''s much easier if you drag the deer the other way, then the antlers won''t drag on the ground." After the other hunter left, they decided to try it. A little while later, George junior said to George senior, "You know, that guy was right. This is a lot easier!" "Yeah," said George senior, "but we''re getting farther from the truck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you fall out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on your way down?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you eat a bowl of stupid for breakfast this morning?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde. The cop asked to see the blonde''s driver''s license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. "What does it look like?" she finally asked. The policewoman replied, "It''s square and it has your picture on it." The driver finally found a square mirror, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said. The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn''t realize you were a cop."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma stinks so bad she has to use Right Guard and Left Guard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom: Why did you get a grade so low? Junior: Because of absence. Mom: Who, You? Junior: No, the kid who sits right next to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Larry, name two pronouns. Larry: Who, Me? Teacher: That answer is correct.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Mississippi River unusual? Because it has four eyes and can''t see!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where did they sign the Declaration of Independence? At the bottom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Alvin, how many letters are in the alphabet? Alvin: 18. Teacher: Wrong, there are 26. Alvin: No, teacher, there used to be 26, but ET went home in a UFO and the CIA went after him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Name an animal that lives in the tundra. Pupil:A reindeer. Teacher: Good, now name another one. Pupil: Another reindeer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher, I can''t do this problem! "Any five year old can do that problem." "Damn! No wonder I can''t do it! I''m almost ten!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Atlas is the biggest thief in history, because he held up the whole world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock. Who''s there? Terra. Terra who? Terra reason you won''t let me in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when every car in the nation is pink? Answer: a pink carnation (the flower)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a priest, a bishop, and the Pope. They were all at the park and they saw a deep pond. The Pope told the bishop and the priest, "I bet I can walk on water". So he goes to the pond and, amazingly, he walks on water and gets to the other side. Then the bishop tells the priest, "I bet I can walk on water". So the bishop goes to the pond and, amazingly, he walks on water and gets to the other side. The priest is so surprised by all this he decides to give it a shot, so he goes to the pond and he steps on the water but he falls in and gets drenched. On the other side, the Pope is telling the bishop, "Do you think we should''ve told him about the stepping stones in the pond?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes decide to go duck hunting. Neither one has ever been before, but they decide to go anyway. They take a couple of guns and a hunting dog and head out into the woods. A few hours later, they still haven''t caught anything. "I don''t get it," says the first blonde. "Why haven''t we caught anything yet?" The second blonde says,"I keep telling you, I just don''t think we''re throwing the dog high enough."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the new blonde paint? It''s not too bright but it spreads real easy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were making their first doctor visit, the wife being pregnant with their first child. After everything checked out, the doctor took a small stamp and stamped the wife''s stomach with indelible ink. The couple was curious about what the stamp read, so when they got home, the husband got out his magnifying glass to try to see what it was. In very tiny letters, the stamp said, "When you can read this, come back and see me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a horny fish? A blowfish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Jimmy! Count from one all the way to ten! Jimmy: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10. Teacher: Good, now what comes after that? Jimmy:Jack, queen and king!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is 4-2? two. What is 8-6? two. Who wrote Tom Sawyer? Twain Now say the answers altogether. Two two Twain. Have a nice twip!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child: "Teacher! I can''t find my boots!" Teacher: "Are you sure?" Child: "Yes! There is only one pair left, and it''s not mine!" Teacher:"Are you sure?" Child:" Definitely! Mine had snow on them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all go to a bar. The redhead walks up to the bartender and says,"I''ll have a BL." So the bartender gives her a Bud Light. The brunette walks up next and says,"I''ll have an ML." So the bartender gives her a Miller Light. The blonde is catchingon so she goes up to the bartender and says,"I''ll have a 15." The bartender thinks about it, looks around, and says,"Ok, you stumped me. What''s a 15?" The blonde goes,"Duh! 7 and 7."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following event actually happened to a famous basketball coach. "When I first got a job as La Salle University''s basketball coach, the phone rang and my wife told me it was Sports Illustrated. I cut myself shaving and fell down the steps in my rush to get the phone. When I got there, a voice on the other end said, ''For just 75 cents an issue...''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t skeletons ever play music at church? Because they don''t have any organs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the statue say to the other after a break-up and make-up? I''m sorry I took you for granite. (granted) hahahaha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Hershey''s chocolate taste so good? Because they are made by women! (Her-She) hahahaha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golf ball is a golf ball, no matter how you putt it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child: Mommy, why am I so skinny? Mommy: Don''t worry about it, dear. When your father was born, he only weighed four pounds. Child: Really? Did he live?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My uncle is very superstitious. He won''t work any week that has a Friday in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so fat she played pool with the planets!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Harry and Sarah were having a petty argument. After shouting back and forth, Sarah finally says, "Let''s make a deal. To end this argument, you admit that I am right and I will admit that I am wrong." Harry thought for a moment, agreed, and asked her to go first. Sarah replied, "I''m sorry Harry, I am wrong." In response, Harry shouts happily, "You''re right!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Earth Worm: Oh, I wish that darn evil Mister Barney hadn''t chopped my brother into two sections! Other Earth Worm: Why? Earth Worm: Because, now I have two half brothers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo? A: The lawyer charges more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Melvin checked out a book from the library because the title read "How to Hug". It turned out to be volume 7 of the encyclopedia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What happened then? A: He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me." Q: Did he kill you? Lawyer: Were you alone or by yourself? Lawyer: Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in? Lawyer: Was that the same nose you broke as a child? Lawyer: You don''t know what it was, and you didn''t know what it looked like, but can you describe it? Lawyer: Have you lived in this town all your life? Witness: Not yet. Lawyer: A Texas attorney, realizing he was on the verge of unleashing a stupid question, interrupted himself and said, "Your Honor, I''d like to strike the next question."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re pretty... pretty ugly! You finally figured out how to screw in that lightbulb, but the power went out. You''re smart... smart as a fencepost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so poor everytime someone rings the doorbell the toilet flushes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid you thought "harass" was two words!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blond quit his restroom attendant job? A: He couldn''t figure out how to refill the hand dryer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If my dog''s face looked like your face, I''d shave his ass and make him walk backwards!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Ike, Anne, Wyatt, Tillie. Ike, Anne, Wyatt, Tillie who? Ike Anne Wyatt Tillie (I can''t wait till) it''s three o'' clock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called when an insect kills themself? Pesticide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Dewey. Dewey Who? Dewey(Do we) have to listen to all this knocking?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Justin. Justin who? Justin town and thought I''d say hello.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Water. Water who? Water you doing?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald(I swallowed) my gum!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Kip. Kip who? Kip your hands off me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Howie. Howie who? Howie gonna figure this out?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, a teacher was showing a child a picture of a firefighter taking a child out of a burning building. The teacher asked what that was. The child replied,"A pregnant firefighter." Instead of scolding him, she calmly asked,"Do you know what pregnant means?" The little boy just said, "Yes, it means to be carrying a child."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so dumb that she went to the movies and after they told her under 17 not permitted she went back and got 16 more friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have a face like a baby, with a brain to match. * Credited to my friend fqzeng.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(especially if you do this in public) Child: Would you still love me if I did something bad? Parent: Yes, of course. Child: I mean something REALLY bad. Parent: Of course... Child: No, I mean something REALLY really bad. Parent: No... Child: No, really. Something REALLY really really- Parent: ALL RIGHT! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO!!!???!!!???!!!???!!!???111///111///111///111/// Child: (Innocently) Nothing, why?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are just a few of those typical sexist jokes- they make me chuckle ( or groan) so ya know- I''m a girl : ) *what''s worse than a male chauvinist pig? - A woman who won''t do what she''s told. *I married Mrs. Right- I just wish I''d known her first name was Always * * How many men does it take to open a beer? -None. It should be open by thetime she brings it * What is the best way to always remember your wife''s birthday? - Forget it once', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mama''s so fat when she went to a hotel she asked for a water bed and they just covered up the pool with a blanket and said no divers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The accountant''s prayer: "Lord, help me be more relaxed about insignificant details, starting tomorrow at 10.53:16 am, Eastern Daylight Saving Time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The accountant was visiting the Museum of Natural History and said to the person standing next to him, "That dinosaur is two billion years and ten months old." "How did you get such exact information?" "I was here ten months ago and the guide said the dinosaur was two billion years old."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Feeling lost and adrift? Gain inner peace by learning the way of the Homer Simpson... Here are some Homeric jewels to live by: "The answers to life''s problems aren''t at the bottom of the bottle. They''re on TV. "What''s the point of going out? We''re just going to end up back here anyway." "Trying is the first step toward failure." "You can''t keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once and move on." "Doughnuts. Is there anything they can''t do?" "The three little sentences that will get you through life. No. 1: Cover for me. No. 2: Oh, good idea, boss. No. 3: It was like that when I got here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Somebody complimented on my driving today, a blonde told her friend, "I found a note on my windshield that said''Parking Fine''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gladiator was having a rough day at the arena-his opponent had sliced off both of his arms. Nevertheless, he fought on, kicking and biting as furiously as he could. But when his opponent lopped off both feet, the gladiator had no choice but to give up. He was now both unarmed and defeated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Irvin is driving down the freeway to go to work when his cell phone rings. It''s his wife: "Irving,I just heard on the news that there''s a car going down the freeway in the wrong direction. Please try to be careful." "It''s true,"Irving replies,"But not just one car- there are hundreds of them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married couple, both 60 years old, were celebrating their 35th anniversary. During their party, a fairy appeared to congratulate them and grant them each one wish. The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her wand and POOF--the wife had tickets in her hand for a world cruise. Next, the fairy asked the husband what he wanted. He said, "I wish I had a wife 30 years younger than me." So the fairy picked up her wand and POOF -- the husband was 90.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man phoned up an exclusive escort agency and asked for a woman. "No problem," said the receptionist. "There''s just one thing," said the man,"she has to be 6'' 6" tall and weigh 48lbs." "Mmm,let me see --yes we can do that for you, but it will be expensive," said the receptionist. "That''s o.k," said the man. "When do you want her?". "Tomorrow night at 7pm," said the man. The next night the doorbell rings and a painfully thin 6'' 6" black woman is standing on his doorstep. "Come in, take off all your clothes and go down on all fours," said the man. She complies with his request. He opens the kitchen door and a scrawny black labrador emerges. The woman thinks, "Oh shit, what have I let myself in for?" The man points at his dog and says, "Now that''s what you''ll look like if you don''t eat all your dog food."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many teachers does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to turn it the other to grade the person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do blondes drive VWs ? A: Because they can''t spell PORSCHE', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After class ends a 1st grader goes up to his teacher and says, "I don''t mean to scare you Teacher but my parents said that if I keep getting bad grades, then..." "Somebody''s gonna get a spanking." (nodnod)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so skinny she can hula-hoop with a cheerio.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your day is bad if your twin sister forgot your birthday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb that when we told her it was a serial killer on the loose she went and locked all the boxes of cereal up in the cabinet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you''re a redneck? If you go to a cousin''s wedding looking for a girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she went on a sea food diet - she see food and eat it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('knock-knock. who''s there? yo mama. yo mama who? this is yo mama stop playing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend''s mom is so fat I was upstairs and when she fell I ran down screaming, "EARTHQUAKE!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between snow men and snow women? Snow BALLS! (Ding dong kind)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she went to commit suicide and tried to jump out her basement window.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so fat she has her own area code.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are some more for you... Yo momma''s so stupid she failed a survey. Yo momma''s so stupid she tried to commit suicide by jumping off a building and she got lost on the way down. Yo momma''s so stupid I saw her jumping up and down, and she said she forgot to shake the medicine before she took it. Yo momma''s so stupid she tried to drown a fish. Yo momma''s so stupid she got hit by a cup and told the police she was mugged. That''s all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you mix cigarettes in hot water? A soggy butt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back? 2.Yeah, I used to cut class a lot too. 3.Let me smell that shirt-don''t worry, its good for another week. 4.Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I''ll be glad to feed him and walk him every day. 5.That outfit isn''t sexy enough, here, unbutton your blouse. 6.Why don''t you hitchhike? It would be totally cheaper. 7.The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It''s not like I''m running a prison around here. 8.Don''t clean your room often; It makes the rest of the house look bad. 9.Can I borrow your new speed-metal CDs? 10.Naw, you don''t have to call me, I''ll eventually figure out what to do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there so few amusement parks in Japan? Because they aren''t tall enough to ride them!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his doctor are discussing a surgery the man will soon undergo. The doctor asks if there are any last questions. "Doctor, will I be able to play my violin after this surgery?" "Of course! Why would you think you couldn''t?" "I couldn''t play it before."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Sue. Sue who? I''ll sue you if ya don''t let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day the zoo-keeper noticed that the orangutan was reading two books: the Bible and Darwin''s Origin of Species. Surprised, he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books?" "Well," said the orangutan, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother''s keeper or my keeper''s brother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher decides to have Career Day in her class. She asks each student to tell the class what their father''s job is, spell it, and then explain what they do. Mary stands up and says, "My father is a policeman. P -O-L-I-C-E-M-A-N. He puts bad people in jail and keeps us all safe." Sue stands up next and says, "My father is a doctor. D-O-C-T-O-R. He helps sick people get better." Bobby is next. He stands up and says, "My father is a pharmacist. F...F-R..." The teacher tells Bobby to sit down and try to figure it out and moves on to the next kid. Johnny stands up next and says, "My father is a bookie. B-O-O-K-I-E. He''d give you 10-1 odds that Bobby is never going to spell ''pharmacist.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you tell if a blonde has stolen your bike? A: She''s running away with it under her arm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy sits down at the bar, and starts telling the bartendar, "I''ve been married for 12 years now and I want some variety. I''m sick of the same old thing! I want something different!" The bartendar says, "12 years thats a long time, you don''t want to do anything stupid! Hell, if ya want something different just flip her over!" The man replies, "What? And have a houseful of kids!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Indian man made a painting with the sun above a beach. He proudly displayed his painting. When people marvel at his work and asked, "What''s it called?" He said, "Sun of a Beach."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the tree that made an Ash of itself?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb, that when we told her it was chilly outside she ran out with a bowl and a spoon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lonely female crab was walking down the beach one evening when she noticed a male crab coming toward herbut he was walking straight and not sideways! Impressed by his talent, she decided to marry him immediately. The next morning she noticed him walking sideways like any ordinary crab! She asked, "What happened? Yesterday you were able to walk straight!" He answered "What?! I can''t get that drunk every day!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you serve food in space? A: On flying saucers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walked up to this little boy and asked what was closer, ( it was a joke) the moon or the Cayman Islands. The little boy said, "The moon, because you can''t see the Caymen Islands, but you can see the moon." The guy decided to show some people on the streets this fine genius. That same day, the guy shouted out, "Listen to the genius. Once the guy asked which was closer, the moon or the Cayman Islands, the little boy said " The Cayman Islands." "Why do you think that?" the guy asked. the boy said "Yesterday, I saw some people from the Cayman Islands. Have YOU ever seen some one from the moon? I sure haven''t."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why was Moses the most wicked man? A. He broke all 10 Commandments at once. Q. What animal could Noah not trust? A. The cheetah. Q. What kind of lights did Noah use on the ark? A. Flood lights.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood curdling scream is heard from the bathroom. A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar. The bartender goes into the bathroom to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What''s all the screaming about in there? You''re scaring the customers!" "I''m just sitting here on the toilet and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my testicles." With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in and says..."You idiot! You''re sitting on the mop bucket!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Exam Question: Define courage. Student Answer: This is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There lived a Chinese and an American in a hotel. One day, the Chinese felt thirsty, so he decided to get a drink of water. So he went to the public refrigerator, took a can of coke, and drank it. Then he wanted to go pee, so he peed in the can, closed the cap, put it back in the fridge, and hid in a corner. The American came a few minutes later. He took the can, took a sip, and then the Chinese man popped out from his hiding place and said: "Me Chinese, "Me play joke, "Me go pee-pee in your coke!" *SOCK*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three women a brunette, a woman with jet black hair, and a blonde were pregnant and at the doctors'' office to find out the sex of their babies. The nurse called for the brunette and she went into the office. She came out very happy and said, "My husband and I had sex standing up and I''m having a girl!" The women with jet black hair was called and went into the office. She came out very happily and said, "My husband and I had sex lying down, and I''m having a boy!" Next the blonde was called and went into the office. She soon ran back out crying. The other two women asked her what was wrong. The blond sobbed, "I''m having puppies!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two carrots are walking down the street one day when a car suddenly comes flying around the corner and runs one of them over. At the hospital, the doctor says to the other carrot, "I have good news and bad news. The good news is your friend is going to live. The bad news is he''ll be a vegetable for the rest of his life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Yoda! Yoda who? Yo-da door''s stuck! Lemme in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At weddings old people poke me and say, "You''re next!" At funerals, I do the same.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she used pillowcases for socks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friend 1:"Yeh,you are looking too fat." Friend 2:"You are looking too old." Friend 1:"I am not old." Friend 2:"Then, I am not too fat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandfather always said, "Don''t watch your money; watch your health." So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to apply for a job. After filling out all of his applications, he waited anxiously for the outcome. The employer read all his applications and said, "We have an opening for people like you." "Oh, great," he said, "What is it?" "It''s called the door!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. If this is tea, please bring me some coffee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have? A. Very large hands. Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand? A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand. Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep? A. No Problems , He sleeps at night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. The Bay of Bengal is in which state? A. Liquid Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will get Wet or Sink as simple as that. Q. What looks like half of an apple ? A. The other half. Q. What happened when the wheel was invented? A. It caused a revolution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind, "If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you." The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. He was astonished. He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted, "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you, and you will die." The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him. The man asked, "Who are you?" "I am your guardian angel," the voice answered. "Oh, yeah?" the man asked. "Then where the hell were you when I got married?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information?" "To save lives," the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture. A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted. "It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Joey, your behavior is terrible! How many more times am I going to have to keep you in after school? Joey: 97. Teacher: 97? Joey: Yeah. That''s how many days are left until the summer holidays.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What goes 99-clump, 99-clump, 99-clump? A centipede with a wooden leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Swen. Swen who? Swen are you going let me in!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER: Why are you late? L-JOHNY: Because of the sign. TEACHER: What sign? L-JOHNY: "School Ahead, Go Slow." TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water? L-JOHNY: "HIJKLMNO"!! TEACHER: What are you talking about? L-JOHNY: Yesterday you only said it''s H to O!!!! TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his father''s Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn''t punish him?" L-JOHNY: "Because George still had the axe in his hand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday, I walked into a pet store. When I walked to the back of the store, I saw an interesting parrot. The parrot had a ribbon on either foot. There was a red ribbon on his left foot, and a blue ribbon on his right foot. As I was wondering what the ribbons were for, the store owner walked up to me. He told me that if I pulled the red ribbon, the parrot would sing the "Star Spangled Banner," and the parrot did. He then told me that if you pulled the blue ribbon, the parrot would sing, "God Bless America," and it did. Interested, I asked the store owner, "What will it do when I pull both ribbons at the same time?" The parrot then yelled, "I''ll fall off my perch, stupid!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The closest you''ve ever come to a brainstorm is a light drizzle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blond think the last 2 words of the national anthem are? Play ball!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister delivered a sermon in 10 minutes one Sunday morning, which was about half the usual length of his sermons. He explained, "I regret to inform you that my dog, who is very fond of eating paper, ate that portion of my sermon which I was unable to deliver this morning." After the service, a visitor from another church shook hands with the preacher and said, "Reverend, if that dog of yours has any pups, I want to give one to my minister."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Hannibal Lecter call Britney Spears? Dinner at Hooters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lady : Is this my train? Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company. Lady : Don''t try to be funny. I mean, can I take this train to Kuala Lumpur? Station Master : No Madam, I''m afraid it''s too heavy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oh, what a shame. It looks like the Ugly Fairy kissed you on both cheeks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the hardest part of skydiving? The ground!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a porcupine with a shark? Far far away!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.) That in school, getting a zero for a grade seems better than getting a 20 or a 30. 2.) That when you are hungry, you look in the refrigerator constantly, even though you know there''s nothing to eat in there. 3.) That ketchup has TONS of sugar? What''s up with that? 4.) That when you vacuum and there''s a piece of lint or something on the floor that''s too big to suck up with the vacuum cleaner, instead of picking it up, you just sit there rolling the vacuum over and over it hoping it will suck it up?? 5.) That when you think of something funny and someone else says,"What''s so funny?" You say,"It''s a long story" when really it isn''t?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican and an Iraqi terrorist are in a car. Who''s driving? Answer: The police.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Analogy of sex: Insert the ''quarter'' into the ''vending machine'' and then the ''gumball'' comes out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The forgien exchanged students Jose, Doron, and Krono didn''t know any English. So their teacher asked them to go find some words. Jose goes to the airport and sees a plane. "Waz dat?" he asks. "That''s a plane taking off," the pilot said. "Take off!" he says. Doron goes to the zoo and sees a zebra. "Waz dat?" he asks. "That''s a zebra," a lady tells him. "Ze''bra!" he says. Krono goes to the hospital and sees a new baby. "Waz dat?" he asks. "That''s my baby," the mother said. "Be''be!" he says. The next day in class, they say all the words together. "Take off ze bra bebe!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s wrong with you? you asked a very dumb guy that was taking your order at the newest resturant in town. "The doctor doesn''t know yet, hehe (snort)."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken pox cross the road? He was afraid if he stayed he would be spotted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do the kids of dentists get around the neighborhood? On Molar-Skates', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What movie is really the sequel to April Fools? The May-Tricks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Samurai Jack''s favorite fish? Swordfish', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What monster was created on April 1? Pranken-stien', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Frayed. Frayed who? Frayed no one''s going to answer the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of teenagers craving something sweet drove to the nearest Baskin-Robbins. They bought ice cream cones and returned to their car to be comfortable. As they settled back to enjoy themselves, two ravens landed on the front hood and began to caw and flutter, and to peck at the windshield. The young man finally figured out what they wanted. He finished his ice cream, opened the window, and put his empty cone on the hood. The birds immediately settled down to eat. "You''re wonderful," said his girlfriend. "How did you ever think of that?" "Nothing to it," he replied. "It was just a case of stilling two birds with one cone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sailor trying to sneak back to his ship about 3 o''clock in the morning was spotted by a chief petty officer who ordered him to explain his tardiness. The lame explanation didn''t work. "Take this broom and sweep every link on this anchor chain by morning or it''s the brig for you," the chief said. The sailor began to sweep, but a tern landed on the broom handle and he couldn''t continue. He yelled at the bird, but it didn''t budge. He finally plucked it off the broom and gave it a toss. But the bird came right back and again landed on the handle. Over and over, the same routine was repeated. A toss, one sweep, and the bird was back. When morning came, the chief also was back. "What have you been doing all night? This chain is no cleaner than when you started!" "Honest, chief," said the sailor, "I tossed a tern all night and couldn''t sweep a link."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Ward goes to the doctor''s office to collect her husband''s test results. The lab tech says to her, "I''m sorry, ma''am, but there has been a big mix-up and we have a problem. When we sent your husband''s samples to the lab, the samples from another Mr. Ward were sent as well and we are now uncertain which one is your husband''s. Frankly, it is either bad or terrible." "What do you mean?" Mrs. Ward asked. "Well, one has tested positive for Alzheimer''s and the other for AIDS. We can''t tell which is your husband." "That''s terrible! Can we do the test over?" questioned Mrs. Ward. "Normally, yes.But Medicare won''t pay for these expensive tests more than once." "Well, what am I supposed to do now?" "The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don''t sleep with him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack locked up his bar and headed home. He''d been asleep a few minutes when the telephone rang. "What time do you open in the morning?" he heard an obviously inebriated man inquire. Furious, Jack slammed the phone down and went back to sleep. But the same guy called again. " You might as well stop calling," Jack shouted." There''s no way I''m letting a drunk like you into my bar!" "I don''t want to get in," the caller interjected."I want to get out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a prince who was under a terrible spell. He could only say one word per year. Then one day, he saw a beautiful princess. He fell in love with her. He vowed to ask her hand in marriage. However, because of the spell, he had to wait for 7 whole years to propose. On the starting of the 8th year, the prince went to the princess'' castle. Knelt down in front of her and said, "I love you, will you marry me?" The princess tossed her enchanting golden hair, straightened her crown, parted her cherry-red lovely lips and said, "I''m sorry, I didn''t hear that. What did you say?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That master detective, Sherlock Holmes, was sitting on his chair beside the fireplace calmly reading a book when suddenly, his good partner, Dr. Watson came in. Sherlock Holmes looked at his friend and smiled, saying, "Why, Dr. Watson, don''t you think the weather is a bit hot for you to be wearing your red flannel underwear?" Dr. Watson was shocked by this incredible and wonderful logic. "My good man," he gasped, "How did you know I was wearing my red flannel underwear?" Holmes smiled wider and put down his book. He explained, "Elementary, my dear Watson. You forgot to put your pants on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for his company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, "Father, me dog is dead. Could ya'' be sayin'' a mass for the poor creature?" Father Patrick replied, "I''m afraid not; we cannot have services for an animal in the church, but there are some Baptists down the lane, and there''s no tellin'' what they believe. Maybe they''ll do something for the creature." Muldoon said, "I''ll go right away, Father. Do ya'' think $5,000 is enough to donate for the service?" Father Patrick exclaimed, "Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus! Why didn''t ya'' tell me the dog was Catholic?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Peyton Manning dies and goes to heaven. Upon arrival, he''s given a nice sized house, and a few of his trophies and some Colts apparel is set up around the house to honor his days as a QB. One day, as he''s walking along the golden streets, he hears the news that Ben Roethlisberger has died. As he looks up, he sees this ridiculously large mansion - a big, BIG mansion. The building is completely decked out and covered in Ben Roethlisberger banners and flags and paraphanelia. Peyton is a little put out, so he goes to see God. "God," he says when he meets him, "I don''t think this is very fair. I mean, I WAS the better quarterback. Just look at my record and my stats! Do you think it''s fair that he gets all that and I just get a little house?" God simply smiles and chuckles a little before shaking his head. "Peyt," he says, "That''s not Ben Roethlisberger''s house. That''s MY house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The skeleton walked into the bar and asked, "Can I have a beer and a mop?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Tennessee? What Arkansas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three Texas surgeons were playing golf together and discussing surgeries they had performed. One of them said, "I''m the best surgeon in Texas. A concert pianist lost seven fingers in an accident; I reattached them, and eight months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England." One of the others said, "That''s nothing: a young man lost both arms and legs in an accident; I reattached them, and two years later he won a gold medal in field events in the Olympics." The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a cowboy who was high on cocaine and alcohol rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the horse''s ass and a cowboy hat. Now he''s president of the United States."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the little boy''s first time on an airplane. He was so excited. When the airplane engines started, the little boy closed his eyes and counted to 100. Then he opened his eyes and peered outside. Pointing, he said to the woman next to him, "See those tiny people down there? They are just like ants!" The woman looked at what he was pointing and remarked, "They are ants. We haven''t left the ground yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('15 Steps to Build a campfire. 1. Split dead limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers. 2. Bandage left thumb. 3. Chop other fragments into smaller fragments. 4. Bandage left foot. 5. Make structure of slivers(including those embedded in hand). 6. Light match. 7. Light match. 8. Repeat "a scout is cheerful," and light match. 9. Apply match to slivers, add wood fragments, and blow gently into base of flames. 10. Apply Burn ointment to nose. 11. When fire is burning, collect more wood. 12. Upon discovery that fire has gone out during your absence, soak wood with liquid from can labeled "kerosene." 13. Treat face and arms for second degree burns, and relabel your can to read "gasoline." 14. When fire is burning well, add all remaining wood. 15. When thunderstorm has passed, repeat steps 1 through 14.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of cheese is not yours? Nacho cheese', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Mexican was finally caught on the borderline of the US by an American cop. The Mexican begged, "Pleese, siir. I muss stay here in America. I muss!" But the American still wasn''t convinced. So, the Mexican pleaded more and more with very bad English. At last, the cop, assuming the Mexican''s English couldn''t get any worst, said to the Mexican, "I will let you stay if you can use 3 words in one sentence." The Mexican thought for a while, and replied, "Is all right. I say. I say." The cop said, "The words are: Green, pink and yellow." After a few seconds of consideration, the Mexican responded, "Da phone - it rang: Green, green, green. I pink it up and sez, ''yellow?''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men or women were more trustworthy. ''No woman,'' said one man, scornfully, ''can keep a secret.'' ''I don''t know about that,'' answered a blonde woman guest. ''I have kept my age a secret since I was twenty-one.'' ''You''ll let it out some day,'' the man insisted. ''I hardly think so!'' responded the blonde lady. ''When a woman has kept a secret for twenty-seven years, she can keep it forever.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All the numbers went to a party and numbers being what they are, all the evens stayed around each other and all the odds did the same and neither group interacted with each other. Whilst two was chatting to four he noticed zero was on his own in the corner and suggested to four that because zero is sort of even he should be encouraged to mix with even numbers - four agreed. So off went two to invite zero into their little group. "Would you like to join our little group" enquired two, to which zero replied "I have nothing to add!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The number you have dialed is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it? A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSC Topper) Q. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it? A. No time at all, as it has already been built. (UPSC 23 Rank Opted for IFS) Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have? A. Very large hands. (Good one) (UPSC 11 Rank Opted for IPS)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the blonde say when she looked in the box of cheerios? A: Oh look, donut seeds!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An astronaut in space was asked by a reporter, "How do you feel?" "How would you feel," the astronout replied, "if you were stuck here, on top of 20,000 parts each one supplied by the lowest bidder?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineer, a mathmatician and an arts graduate were given the task of finding the height of a church steeple (the first to get the correct solution wins a $1000). The engineer tried to remember things about differential pressures, but resorted to climbing the steeple and lowering a string on a plumb bob until it touched the ground and then climbed down and measured the length of the string. The Mathematician layed out a reference line, measured the angle to the top of the steeple from both ends and worked out the height by trigonometry. However, the arts graduate won the prize. He bought the vicar a beer in the local pub and he told him how high the church steeple was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three freshman engineering students were sitting around talking between classes, when one brought up the question of who designed the human body. One of the students insisted that the human body must have been designed by an electrical engineer because of the perfection of the nerves and synapses. Another disagreed, and exclaimed that it had to have been a mechanical engineer who designed the human body. The system of levers and pullies is ingenious. "No," the third student said. "You''re both wrong. The human body was designed by an architect. Who else but an architect would have put a toxic waste line through a recreation area?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A communication technician drafted by the army was at a firing range. At the range, he was given some instruction, a rifle and 50 rounds. He fired several shots at the target. The report came from the target area that all attempts had completely missed the target. The technician looked at his weapon, and then at the target. He looked at the weapon again, and then at the target again. He then put his finger over the end of the rifle barrel and squeezed the trigger with his other hand. The end of his finger was blown off, whereupon he yelled toward the target area: "It''s leaving here just fine, the trouble must be at your end!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A salesman, and engineer, and a technician are driving in a car when, just outside of town, they get a flat tire. The three of them get out of the car and scratch their heads. The salesman says, "Maybe I should walk into town and get us a new tire. I know that I can bargain with the man at the parts store and get us a great deal." The engineer stops him, saying, "No, before you do that, we''ll have to do some computations, figuring the grade of the road, the asphalt temperature, and the average rate of speed we will be traveling to know what kind of tire you should buy." The technician laughs and shakes his head. "No, no, no! What''s wrong with you guys? Hell, we have a spare tire in the trunk - now all we have to do is start swapping tires until we find the flat one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, when she went to the house of mirrors, it collapsed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas so old her birth certificate says "EXPIRED"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant? He forgot to wrap the "Whopper"!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Angie and John were in court after deciding their divorce when the problem of ''who gets to keep the kid'' started to arise. Angie exclaimed that the child was hers since she could take care of the kid better than her ''wretched'' husband. But the judge wanted to hear John''s reason of why he should keep the baby. After thinking for sometime, John said, "Your honor, let me ask you a question: if you put a dollar inside a vending machine and a coke comes out, does this coke belong to you or does it belong to the vending machine?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('His wife had been killed in an accident and the police were questioning Mr Finnegan. "Did she say anything before she died?" asked the sergeant. "She spoke without interruption for about forty years," said the Irishman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her friend were tracing their names from stencils to cut out. When they ran out of room, the blonde turned the paper over and said,"Hey, there''s lots more room on this side!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a woodpecker without a beak? A headbanger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Violets are blue. Yo momma is ugly, And she looks just like you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was late to school on the first day, and his new teacher asked, "What is your name young man?" The boy replied," Michael Gay." The teacher said," Why are you calling a kid gay? What is your name boy?" The boy said, "Michael Gay!" The teacher said," That''s ENOUGH young man. Go to the principal''s office. THIS SECOND!" The principal saw him and asked him," What is your name young man?" The boy says, " Michael Gay." The principal asks," Why are you calling a gay?" And what is your name?" The boy gets angry and says, "Michael Gay!" The principal says, "Thats it young man, you''re suspended! The boy got home and his mother asked," Why are you in trouble?" The boy says, "Michael Gay." The mother says, "I know your name, dear, why are you in trouble?" The boy says," MICHAEL GAY!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: Haven''t we been on a couple dates before? Woman: Couldn''t have been. I don''t make the same mistake twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BOB- We were learning about fractions today in math class. JOE- Oh, really? What did you learn? BOB- One half of what I was supposed to!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between MJ and Mr. Potato Head? MJ has more noses. How are MJ and a Wal-Mart bag alike? They''re both plastic and hazardous to children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was playing internet games on Yahoo. Finding it hilarious, he had named himself "emilycheesehotchick". One time, while playing pool, his opponent messaged to him "Want to have cyber sex...?" Curiousity took over him, and so he replied "Sure!". Thus followed a hot and mostly one-sided cyber sex, when all of a sudden, his mother came into the room. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" asked his mother. "I...I....I''m having cybersex with someone on Yahoo..." he replied. The mother paused...and then asked, "Are you emilycheesehotchick...?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the dick say to the condom? Cover me, I''m goin in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Given m = money, e = evil, t = time and w = women, prove that women are evil (women = evil) 1. m = e ^ (1/2) (money is the root of all evil) 2. t = m (time is money) 3. w = t * m (women are the product of time and money) 4. w = m ^ 2 (substitution) 5. w = {e ^ (1/2)} ^ 2 (substitution) 6. w = e Proven by mathematics - women are evil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which comes first, Ben-Gay or Preparation H? Ben-Gay. After you have been gay, you''ll need the Preparation H.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the blonde say when she crossed the road? A: Hey! How''d I get over here?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time in India, the Bengal tiger was on the brink of extinction, due to a vigorous hunting season. So, Prince Naranjahah ordered that no one shall kill another Bengal. Well, this led to the over abundance in zoos and animal shelters, and one day, the tigers broke loose and started attacking the citizens. The citizens then revolted and overthrew the Prince''s rule. This is the first known instance of the reign being called on account of the game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a brick. She''s flat on all sides and gets laid all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently, Today Tonight have held a survey. The results indicate that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the population.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock who''s there? Ivanna Ivanna who? Ivanna come in, dammit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little johnny walked into a club where people were doing the macarena. He watched them for a while, and asked someone: "What are you guys doing? Searching for your wallets?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that when she went out dressed in green she got arrested for driving a tank.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Humpty dumpty go to the shrink? Cause he was half cracked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A middle school student was working at a shop for his after-school job. He had on a Dairy Queen shirt. A kindergarten student walked up to him and said, "Wow, I have 3 of those shirts! You must be cheap!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A distraught patient phoned her doctor''s office. "Is it true," the woman wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?" "Yes, I''m afraid so," the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence before the woman continued, "I''m wondering, then, just how serious my condition is, because this prescription is marked ''NO REFILLS.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come people are willing to get up off their butts to search the whole room for the remote, because they refuse to get up and change channels manually?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once were two babies both in the same room, with their cribs next to each other. After their mom tucked the babies in for sleep, one baby went to the other baby and said, "I can tell if you are a girl or a boy." The other baby said, "OK, what am I then?" The baby went under the other babies blanket and came up a minute later, and said with a grin on his face, "You are a girl and I am a boy." The second baby asked, "And how do you know that?" The baby replied, "I know because you have pink slippers and I have blue slippers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a joke song ok "I pledge allegiance to the flag, Micheal Jackson is a fag. He used to play with little toys, but now he plays with little boys."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, she looked at me and my eyes burned off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich Chinese family (a 36 year old dad, a 36 year old mom, and a 2 year old son) was flying in their private jet. It ran out of fuel, and there were only two parachutes. The parents decided they could always have another son, so they grabbed the parachutes and jumped off. When they got home, they saw their son sitting on their porch. "How the hell did you get here? And before us?" the dad said, confused. The little boy stood up and said, "Me Chinese, me think fast, me hold on to daddy''s ass. He make fart, I go zoom, that''s how I get home so soon!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the blonde have tire tracks on her back? A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON''T WALK"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard they were going to name a highway after Willie Nelson in Texas... But be Warned: When taking this highway look out for pot holes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you here about the new redneck Barbie doll? It comes with twelve kids, aids, and a welfare check.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning, during breakfast, I say, "I had the strangest dream. It was about aliens." My mother asks, "What are aliens?" My father asks, "What kind?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 23999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma can be used as a weapon: she''s so ugly, she''ll blind house robbers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from KFC', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From the Northwest Florida Daily News comes this story of a Crestview couple who drove their car to Wal-Mart, only to have their car break down in the parking lot. The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car in the lot. The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection, she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones. Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand UP his shorts, and tucked everything back into place. On regaining her feet, she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by. The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his forehead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how young children have that special hobby of always asking "Why?" Well, one day I went to the bank to pay some bills, and my 4-year-old daughter did just so. "Mommy, why are we coming here?" "So mommy can pay some bills." "Why?" "So that we can keep our house." "Why?" "So that we won''t have to live on the streets." "Why?" "Because that''s what will happen if we don''t pay for our house." "Why?" "Because that''s the way it goes." "Why?" "Why do you keeping asking ''why?''." "...why?" "You''re being a nuisance." "Why?" "Because you got that from your father." "Why?" "Because your father is a nuisance." "Why?" "I don''t know, you go ask HIM and then tell me why."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder who? Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder, Broken tape recorder...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Pencil. Pencil who? Pencil fall down if you don''t wear a belt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Chugga Chugga Chooch Chugga Chugga Chooch Who? Wheeee!! A train! All aboard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s feet are so ashy she leaves white footprints. Yo Momma''s house is so nasty the roaches moved out. Yo Momma''s hair is so short it''s ingrown. I would stay and chat, but yo momma''s water bowl is empty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton went in for her yearly check-up. When it was finished, she asked her gynecologist how everything was. He said he was pleased and that she was in great shape, and that she was pregnant. "No way!" she exclaimed, but he assured her she was most definitely pregnant. She stormed out of the examining room, grabbed the receptionist''s phone and dialed the private line in the Oval Office. When Bill answered the phone, she shouted, "I can''t believe it! I''m pregnant! You got me pregnant!" The president didn''t say anything, and she screamed, "Didn''t you hear me?? I''m pregnant! You got me pregnant!" Hesitantly, the president asked, "Um...who IS this?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wise man once said. I Don''t know ask A Girl! A wise man Once Said. Life sucks and then we die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t lose my mind! I sold it on Ebay...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For all of you who say I need anger management... Just to let you know, if I could control my anger, I''d destroy you with it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was seen on a bulletin board at a grocery store: "I have kidnapped myself. Please give me $2,000,000 and 5 tacos or you will never see me again." And a different one: "I''m missing, so I have gone to look for myself. If I come back here before I do, please keep me safe here until I return. Thanks!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We and You is friends. You smile, We smile..... You hurt, We hurt.... You cry, We cry... You jump off a bridge... We gonna miss you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a hardy Indiana rainstorm filled all the potholes in the streets and alleys, a young mother watched her two little boys playing in the puddle through her kitchen window. The older of the two, a five year old lad, grabbed his sibling by the back of his head and shoved his face into the water hole. As the boy recovered and stood laughing and dripping, the mother runs to the yard in a panic. "Why on earth did you do that to your little brother?!" she says as she shook the older boy in anger. "We were just playing ''church'' mommy," he said. "I was baptizing him in the name of the Father, the Son and in the hole-he-goes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are actual bumper stickers that were found on people''s cars: The proctologist called; they found your head. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke off. Guys; just because you have one, doesn''t mean you have to be one. If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you. Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them. Don''t like my driving? Then quit watching me. Save your breath. You''ll need it to blow up your date. Some people just don''t know how to drive. I call these people "Everybody But Me," Try not to let your mind wander, it''s too small, it''ll get lost. Welcome to America! Now, learn to speak English.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Tommy ran to his dad and said "Daddy, daddy! Watch me count." Tommy holds up his right hand, and, touching each finger, counts to five. "One, two, three, four, five." "Good!" his dad exclaimed. "Can you count higher?" Tommy pauses to think for a minute, then stretches his hand higher up in the air, past his head. "One, two, three, four, five..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest, a minister and a guru sat discussing the best positions for prayer while a telephone repairman worked nearby. "Kneeling is definitely the best way to pray," the priest said. "No," said the minister. "I get the best results standing with my hands outstretched to Heaven." "You''re both wrong," the guru said. "The most effective prayer position is lying down on the floor." The repairman could contain himself no longer. "Hey, fellas," he interrupted, "The best prayin'' I ever did was when I was hangin'' upside down from a telephone pole."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Could you fax me your photo very very urgently? Mind you it''s really very very urgent, damn serious and very important ..... I''m playing cards and we''ve misplaced the JOKER.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Dr. Ruth, I''m writing to tell you my problem. It seems I have been married to a sex maniac for the past 22 years. He makes love to me regardless of what I am doing. Ironing, washing dishes, etc. I should like to know if there is anything thet yiu vwn fi gue hduuen jsy jjeh jduue jheyhdu judgge jji jjie. njdsfhu', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PLEASE DON''T SMOKE IN MY OFFICE! I enjoy sex more than you enjoy smoking but you don''t see me screwing in your office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What she says: Any ring is fine, as long as I have you. What she''s thinking: No diamond? How cheap! I''ll make his life a living hell! I''ll put poison in his coffee! I''ll cut his brake lines! Get her a diamond, idiot!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have the typical observant wife. One evening after dinner, she handed me a bottle of that Rogaine hair restorer. I told her while I was indeed starting to thin out some, I didn''t really think I needed hair restorer yet. She said, "Oh. It''s not for you, it''s for your secretary, she seems to be losing quite a bit of her hair on your jacket."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear brother, I smile because you are my brother. I laugh because there is absolutely nothing you can do about it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not against Avril Lavigne or anything, I like her, but I heard this, and it was pretty funny. This is the changed lyric to the chorus of Complicated: "Why''d you have to go and make me so constipated? You see the way I''m scrunching up my pitiful face when I''m on the toilet, And during this I - I push, and I strain, and I sweat, and I pray, Dear Lord, that you''ll let it come out; Sooner or later I''ll have to leave the bathroom, Yeah, yeah, yeah..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are phrases found on funny T-shirts: *(camoflauge) Ha! Now you can''t see me! * He did it --> *The leprechauns are after my stash. *I do what the voices tell me to do... *Not the brightest crayon in the box, are we? *See no homework, Speak no homework, Hear no homework, DO NO HOMEWORK. *I bet you were an ugly baby. *(Picture of Simpsons on it) I see dumb people... *I didn''t do it. *(Scribbles all over it) Don''t drink and draw. *(Picture of skunk) Silent but deadly... *He farted --> *(Picture of gas station) I have gas! *(Squirrels) Protect your nuts. *I''m out of bed and dressed, what more do you want? *Help! I talk too much! *(Upside down) If you can read this, please send me back to the bar... *The closest I got to an 86% average in college was my alcohol blood level. *My parents think I''m in school *My girlfriend thinks I''m out of town *FOR SALE *(Big smilie) I''m no longer a danger to society!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Batman once wrote on the wall, "Superman is a wimp." The next day, Superman wrote "Batman is Bruce Wayne."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A zebra had died and when he got to Heaven he asked the guard, out of curiosity, if he was white with black strips or black with white strips. The guard said that he would see God roaming around Heaven and the zebra could ask Him. A couple weeks later he finally sees God and asks, "Out of curiosity, am I white with black stripes or black with white strips." God answered, "You are what your are." The zebra was puzzled, but went along anyway. A few days later the zebra sees the guard again. The guard said, "So did you see God? What did he say?" The zebra replied, "Well, he said ''You are what are what your are.''" The guard goes, "Oh, then it means that you are white with black stripes." The zebra asked, "How do you know?" The guard answered, "If you were black with white stripes, He would have said ''You is what you is''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Announcer, at a diving competition: "Ladies and gentlemen, we have both good and bad news to announce. The good news is that the dive just performed was fantastic and the judges have managed to give it a full score of ten. The bad news is... there was no water in the pool."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly gentleman went to see his doctor and asked for a prescription of Viagra. The doctor said, "That''s no problem. How many do you want?" The man answered, "Just a few, maybe 4, but cut each one in 4 pieces." The doctor said, "That won''t do you any good." The elderly gentleman said, "That''s all right. I don''t need them for sex any more as I am over 90 years old. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don''t pee on my shoes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the penny become angry with the nickel? Because the nickel was a "penny pincher".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one tradesman say to another? I hope you have a "barter" day tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and a her daughter go to a restaurant for breakfast to celebrate her birthday. The restaurant is known for its imported cheeses. The mother asks, "Would you like some cheese, my angel?" The little girl says,"Sure, but can you take out the holes in the cheese?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A famous blonde actress and her husband are going to meet an American. However, her husband has forgotten the young man''s name. Later, the young man asks for an autograph. She asks, trying to find his name out, "How do you spell your name?" Upon hearing this, he said,"B-E-N A long time ago when I saw your first play on Broadway and got an autograph, you knew how to spell it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? No one. No one who? No one to tell you who''s here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Little Jimmy has a dentist appointment. The appointment is during 7:20 to 8:20, which is the first hour of Little Jimmy''s school. The appointment went fine, but Little Jimmy''s mom had to get up from bed early to take Little Jimmy to his appointment, so she is a little tired. Little Jimmy''s mother gives him a note, and she instructs him to give the note to his teacher. Little Jimmy doesn''t look at the note, then when he gets into his classroom, he hands the note to his teacher, just as his mother had instructed. His teacher took the note, took a glance at it, then fainted. Little Jimmy and his classmates ran over to her to look at the note to see what all the commotion was. The note read, "Little Jimmy had a dentist appointment today. I''m sorry for his absence. Please let him be executed at school today. Signed, Tara Fox."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde bury her walkman? Because the batteries were dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a stereotypical blonde spell "farm"? E-I-E-I-O', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are some real people''s names, and what they grew up to be. They are all true: 1.) Iccolo Miccolo played the piccolo for the Los Angeles Philharmonic Orchestra. 2.) H.M. Balmer was a funeral director in Fort Collins, Colorado. 3.) Miss Birdie Snyder married C. Canary and became Birdie Canary. 4.) Perhaps it was best to ignore the orders of Dr. Besick, a doctor in Chicago, Illinois. 5.) The Clipper brothers worked as barbers in Bakersfield, California. 6.) Mr. Thrift of Keepit, Australia, won the $30,000 first prize in a lottery. 7.) D. Sharp was a radio tenor. 8.) Dr. H.A. Toothacre worked as dentist for the Burlington, Iowa, Independent School District. 9.) B.F. Parsons was a parson who lived in the parsonage on Parson Street in Sarna, Michigan. 10.) Greg Lawless was a police officer. And Finally... 11.) A.C. Current was an electrical contractor in Tontogany, Ohio. His son''s name? D.C. Current.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Mexican and a Bench? A bench can support a whole family.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Banta Singh got tired of being the butt of jokes, and decided to do his PhD. Banta was looking out for a unique subject to write his thesis when he saw a cockroach. Banta placed the cockroach on the table and cuts one of its leg. Then he said "Walk". The cockroach moves forward. Then Banta cut its second leg and commanded "Walk". The cockroach manages to moves forward. Then Banta cut its third leg and commanded "Walk". The cockroach manages to wriggle forward on one leg. Finally Banta cut its fourth leg and said "Walk". The poor cockroach could not move and lay helplessly on the table. He repeats the same with over 1000 cockroaches. He finds that the results in all his experiments match. Banta is jubilant. "Now," says Banta "My thesis is ready!" and proceeds to write it: "When you cut four legs of a cockroach, it becomes deaf."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of drug dealers from Mexico tried transporting 6,240 pounds of marijuana to America, by hiding it in a tanker truck disguised as a gasoline truck. They were clever, but not bright. They misspelled the name of the gas station on the side of the truck. A woman was arrested in Lake City, Florida for robbery of a motel. She was armed with only an electric chainsaw that was not plugged in. Police in Idaho were amused when they arrived to write up a burglary, and the homeowner told them that the thief had taken his VCR, his bong, and his stash of marijuana. The police ticketed the guy for possession of drug paraphernalia. A girl went to a Taco Bell and asked for a taco with minimal lettuce. The guy behind the cash register said, "Sorry, we only have iceberg lettuce." A student in Belle, West Virginia was suspended for 3 days for giving a friend a cough drop. The principal reiterated the school''s ''Zero tolerance policy.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many authors are disputing who wrote the Shakespeare plays. They each say they did. In their arguing, they decide to try and prove who wrote it by first showing Shakespeare''s work, then theirs. Shakespeare version: TITANIA to BOTTOM Thou art as wise as thou art beautiful. Jack London''s version: TITANIA to BOTTOM You''re as wise as the snowy owl and as beautiful as the clear night sky with fresh white snow under the Northern lights. Dr. Seuss'' version: TITANIA to BOTTOM You''re as attractive as green eggs on a plate and the way you sing is fantastically great! Homer''s version: TITANIA to BOTTOM Be you as wise as Odysseus and as beautiful as fair Helen. Guess who won.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good Ev''nin America! I, George Dubya Bush, confess that I wrote the Shakespeare plays. First of all, I''m very intellentifull. I didn''t mean to confusinate you, but I''m just that smart. Do not misunderestimate me because I can''t prononunce n-n-n-uclar -you know what I mean. Shakespeare was in my axis of evil, so I wrote the plays. I mean, who would write plays like "A Homedy of Terrors, Nothing to Say about Something, The Naming of my Poo, Porklet, and A Late Winter''s Ice Cream?" I must also give credit to my Secretary of State, Donald Rumpelstiltskin for playing an interceptun on my fumble.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl, "Oh, Superman I love you so much!" Superman,"I don''t blame you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CAT 1- So how''d that milk drinking contest go? CAT 2- Oh, I won by six laps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny: Hey dad, are bugs good to eat? Dad: Son, let''s not talk about that at the dinner table, okay? Little Johnny and his dad were talking after dinner... Dad: So what did you want to say about bugs? Little Johnny: Oh, nothing. There was one in your soup, but it''s gone now!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BOB: Hey, I ran into George the other day. JOE: Oh, really? Was he happy to see you? BOB: Well, we were in our cars at the time...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a priest who had to spend the night in a hotel and offered the hat check girl to come up to his room for dinner. After a while he started advancing on her when she stopped him and reminded him he was a holy man. "It''s o.k.," he replied, "it''s written in the Bible." So after a wild night of sex the hat check girl asked to see where in the Bible it says it''s okay. The priest picks up the Bible off the dresser opens to the first page where someone wrote in pencil - "The hat check girl puts out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat that when she put on a yellow jacket kids tried to get on it to go to school because they thought it was a bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rancher walked up to the window at the post office, where a new clerk was sorting mail. "Any mail for Mike Howe?" the rancher asked. The clerk ignored him and the rancher repeated his question in a louder voice. Without looking up, the clerk said, "No, none for your cow and none for your horse, either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Now doctor, isn''t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn''t know about it until the next morning? Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he? Q: Were you present when your picture was taken? Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war? Q: Did he kill you? Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision? Q: You were there until the time you left, is that true? Q: How many times have you committed suicide?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry La Prise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey", died peacefully at age 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in - then the trouble started.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 14-year old boy was helping his mom wash the dishes after dinner on a beautiful day. He says, "Mom, can I go outside? I want to play football." His mom says, "OK, but on one condition: you let your little brother play with you and your friends." The teenager replied with, "But mom, we already tried that. This time I want to play with a real football!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a list of what I have learned so far in my life: 1.) Always smile. It makes adults wonder what you''re up to. 2.) Golf is no longer a rich man''s sport. There are millions of poor players. 3.) If at first you DO succeed, try to hide your astonishment. 4.) It takes a thousand nuts and bolts to put a car together, yet just one nut to scatter it all over the road. 5.) NEVER play leapfrog with a unicorn. 6.) NEVER ask your dad to help you with your math homework, unless you want a 4-hour lecture. 7.) When things look black, send them to the laundry. 8.) Be tolerant of those who disagree with you. After all, they''re entitled to their stupid opinions!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was Superbowl Sunday for the animals, and the Elephants were playing the Cows. The whole first half of the game, the Elephants got their butts whipped. The cows were winning by a mile. By halftime, the Elephants were about ready to give up. But at the start of the second half, a new player ran on to the field. It was a Centipede! He was so fast the cows couldn''t even get within five feet of him. In no time, the Elephants had twice as many points as the cows. At the end of the game, the coach of the Elephants thanked the centipede for helping them win the Super Bowl. "But I just want to know, why didn''t you come out until halftime?" The centipede answered, "It took me that long to put my shoes on!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were arguing when the man commented smugly, "You know, women talk so much! They talk twice as much as man do!" The wife thought for a while and said, "The reason women talk so much is because they have to repeat everything they say." The man frowned. Then he said, "What?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The top 10 signs your best mate is actually a secret agent.... 1. His shoe keeps ringing. 2. When you borrow something from him, it explodes after a week. 3. When you drive his car, you accidentally shoot down the AA Roadwatch helicopter. 4. Various other items he owns self-destruct within five seconds of being handled. 5. He introduces himself with his surname then his first name then his surname again. 6. The dashboard of his new sports car resembles an airplane cockpit. 7. Commutes to the office using a jet pack. 8. "Where do I work? Uh... in the Financial Services Centre! Heheh..." 9. Asks to borrow your exploding pens. 10. Favourite phrase is "Yeah, baby... yeah!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a man speaks in the middle of the forest and no women are around to hear him, is he still wrong?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some common phrases that bees should know: Are you are hipbee? How comb? Hive already finished.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Is A True Senior''s Moment: An elderly couple had dinner at another couple''s house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two elderly gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant, and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly." The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?" The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... the one that is red and has thorns." "Do you mean a rose?" "Oh, yes," the man said, and then he turned toward the kitchen and yelled, "Rose, what''s the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new jewelry store was opening for the first time. On the front of the store, there was a sign that said "Popular Prices". A man looked at the sign and walked right in. He asked the employee at the desk, "How much for that pearl necklace?" "14,000 dollars." "What? How are those popular prices?" The employee replied meekly, "We like ''em."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you list your dog or cat as a dependent on your taxes. You might be a redneck if you have never been on a main road. You might be a redneck if you drive a minivan to the prom. You might be a redneck if the most expensive jewelery you have came from Dollar General.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have more than three first names. You drove a monster truck to the prom. You are marrying your brother-in-law. You go out, get drunk, and come home with a tatoo of your momma''s name. Your last name is your first name spelled backwards You are readiing these jokes!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stupidity is not a crime... So you''re free to go!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so old your social security number is 1!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Going to bed the other night, I noticed people in my shed, stealing things. I phoned the police but was told nobody was in the area to help. They said they would send someone over as soon as possible. I hung up. A minute later, I phoned again. "Hello" I said, "I called you a minute ago because there were people in my shed. You don''t have to worry now because I shot them." Within minutes, there were half a dozen police cars in the area, plus helicopters and an armed response unit. They caught the burglars red-handed. One of the officers said, "I thought you said you shot them." To which I replied, "I thought you said there was no one available."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother found her son scooping ice cream in the kitchen and she was mad. Mom : "Dinner is going to be ready in an hour, put that ice cream away and go play." Son : "But mom, there''s no one to play with." Mom : "I''ll play with you, what do you wanna play?" Son : "Lets play mommy and daddy, you go upstairs and lay down on the bed." The mom said "ok", and went upstairs. The son put on his dad''s fishing hat and lit up one of his dad''s cigarettes. He went upstairs and opened the door. Mom : "Now what do I do?" Son : "Get your ass out of bed, you whore, and fix that kid some friggin ice cream."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You were so ugly as a baby, your incubator was tinted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doctors were talking about their work. "I had great success with one of my patients," said the first doctor. "When he came to me, he thought he was as small as a mouse." "And you cured him?" the second docter asked. "I convinced him that many of the world''s greatest men were small," the first docter said, "He was doing quite well. Then - I lost him." "What happened?" "It was an accident," the doctor sighed sadly, "A pussy cat ate him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oscar got to the broken down inn and asked for a room. "I have only one room left," said the innkeeper, "But before I give it to you, I must tell you that room is where the white-eyed ghost lives." Oscar wasn''t worried. "I''ll take the room," he said, "I''m not afraid of ghosts." That night, when Oscar went to bed, a scary voice said, "Boooo! I am the white-eyed ghost...." "Shut up!" Oscar said, "i''m tired!" "Boooooo" the ghost said again, "I am the white-eyed ghost!" Oscar sat up, reached over, picked up a chair and threw it at the ghost, who disappeared. Oscar lay down again and shut his eyes. "Boooooo!" moaned the voice from the darkness, "I am the black-eyed ghost...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once the head teacher of a primary school walked into a classroom and started firing questions at the students. Head Teacher: "Who made the world?" The students shivered with fright but no one answered. Head Teacher: "Children,I asked, WHO MADE THE WORLD?" The teacher''s voice was getting louder and the kids were freaking out. The head teacher banged his fist on the front desk and yelled: "I SAID, WHO MADE THE WORLD?" One of the students on the front seat yelled out in fright, "OH PLEASE SIR, IT WASN''T ME!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mom was wanting to get her boobs enlarged. Unfortunately for her, she didn''t have enough money to get it done. In fact, she had exactly half the money needed. She was telling her son, Little Benny, "Honey, Mommy really wants to get a boob job. But Mommy has only half the money." She hung her head, and her son said puzzled, "Well why can''t mommy just pick one?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My family has no traditions. We just do the same thing, over and over again, each year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock? Who''s there? Estelle. Estelle Who? Estelle am waiting for you to open this door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LADY TO BEGGAR- Why don''t you get a job? BEGGAR- Actually, I''m an author. I once wrote a book entitled "One Hundred Ways to Make Money." LADY- Well then why are you begging? BEGGAR- It''s one of my ways...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So what''s your dog''s name? "I don''t know. He won''t tell me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One fine day in the middle of the night, Two dead men got up to fight, Back to back they faced each other, Drew their swords and shot each other, A paralyzed donkey passing by, Kicked a blind man in the eye, Knocked him through a nine-inch wall Into a dry ditch and drowned them all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PATIENT: "Doctor can you help me? It''s my hearing. I can''t even hear myself cough." DOCTOR: "Okay, have this prescription filled." PATIENT: "Oh, will it improve my hearing?" DOCTOR: "No, but it will help you cough better."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FOREST WARDEN: "Which of you saw this rare tree get cut down? CAMPER: "Only the chain saw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are some books that should never be written: Workaholism, by Anita Dayoff Never Say Goodbye, by C.U. Latta Crowd Control, by General Panic Amazing Facts, by G. Willikers The Last Supper, by M.T. Potts Fast Food, by Eaton Run The Bee Hive, by I. Ben Stung Turn Off The Light, by Les Watts Cattle Ranching, by Brandon D. Bull Bullfighting Mistakes, by Gordon Bluddy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CUSTOMER: "Look at that watch you sold me. It broke. You told me it would last a lifetime." CLERK: "Yeah, well you looked pretty sick the day you bought it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JUDGE: "The court can produce a dozen witnesses who saw you rob the bank." ROBBER: "Big deal! I can bring in hundreds of people who didn''t see it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DOCTOR: "Do you smoke or drink?" PATIENT: "I didn''t know I had a choice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pious man, who had reached the age of 105, suddenly stopped going to synagogue. Alarmed by the old fellow''s absence after so many years of faithful attendance, the Rabbi went to see him. He found him in excellent health, so the Rabbi asked, "How come after all these years we don''t see you at services anymore?"The old man lowered his voice. "I''ll tell you, Rabbi," he whispered. "When I got to be 90, I expected God to take me any day. But then I got to be 95, then 100, then 105. So, I figured that God is very busy and must''ve forgotten about me, and I don''t want to remind Him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PIANO PLAYER: "Do you think I have a gift for playing?" LISTENER: "No, but I''ll give you one for stopping!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so short that when she sat on the curb her legs swing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tyler and Katz, two judges, were each arrested on speeding charges. When they arrived in court on the appointed day, no one was there, so instead of wasting time waiting around they decided to try each other. Motioning Tyler to the stand, Katz said, "How do you plead?" "Guilty." "That''ll be fifty dollars and a warning from the court." Katz stepped down and the two judges shook hands and changed places. "How do you plead?" asked Tyler. "Guilty." Tyler reflected for a moment. "These reckless driving cases are becoming all too common of late," he pointed out. "In fact, this is the second such incident in the last quarter hour. That''ll be two hundred dollars and ten days in jail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rising gas prices have caused the following event: The wife comes home and says, "It''s been a tough week. I want you to take me someplace expensive tonight." The husband promptly takes her to the nearest Gas Station.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom (Reprimandingly): Julia! How many times must I tell you not to pull the cat''s tail? Julia (Innocently): But Mom, I''m only holding the tail. It''s the cat that''s doing the pulling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found this joke someplace: In middle school, I was always self-conscious about my height. Once I was asked out by a life-guard. I had never really stood next to him and didn''t know how tall he was, so the night of the date I took out two pairs of shoes-one with heels, one flat. I arranged with my brother to answer the door, compare his height with my date''s and run upstairs to let me know which shoes to wear. When doorbell rang I waited. Then my brother showed up and told me what I didn''t want to hear: "Go barefoot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Mikey''s parents were going out, and Mikey said, "For 20 bucks, Dad, I''ll be good." "Oh please," said his father. "When I was your age, I was good for nothing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between ignorance and apathy? "I don''t know; and I couldn''t care less."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man with two left feet walked into a shoe store and asked, " Do you have any flip-flips?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ther was a blind man walking along with his guide dog when he came to a road. The dog stopped for a second and then carried on into the thick of the traffic. The man was almost hit several times but he managed to get to the other side unharmed. When he got to the other side he took a treat for his dog out of his bag as a reward. A man driving by saw this and stopped and asked the man, "Why the hell are you rewarding your dog if he almost got you killed?" The blind man replied, "Because I''m trying to find his head so I can kick his ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student was in the percussion section of the band, and was not doing well. The band had a performance that night, and the conductor had an annoucement to make. The conductor said, "When a student is having trouble playing an instrument, we can give him two sticks and make him a percussionist, and let him play the drums, which---" The conductor was interrupted by a student in the back of the room who said, "And when that''s too hard for him, we can take one of his sticks away, and make him a conductor!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dumb blonde, smart blonde, santa clause, and the tooth fairy are walking on the sidewalk together. One of them steps on a five dollar bill. Who picks it up? Answer no one!! three of them don''t exist and the dumb blonde thought it was a gum wrapper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus, Moses and an Old Man with a long gray beard, in overalls were playing golf. Moses tees off and his ball lands 5 inches from the hole. "Nice shot, Moses," says Jesus. Next, Jesus tees off. His ball lands 2 inches from the hole. "Well, you were closer that I was," said Moses. Next the old man tees off. As he is chewing on a piece of straw, he watches his ball head straight for the water hazard, where it is immediately swallowed by a fish. Just as the fish jumps up to swallow the ball, an eagle swoops down and grabs the fish. As the eagle is flying away, a lightning bolt strikes him and he drops the fish. The fish lands about 10 inches from the hole and the ball pops out and rolls right into the hole. Jesus looks back and says, "Nice shot, Dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?" A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said, "All I want out of life is four little animals." The teacher asked, "Really and what four little animals would that be sugar?" The little girl said, "A mink on my back, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bed, and a jackass to pay for all of it." The teacher fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Barbara Walters of 20/20 did a story on gender roles in Kabul several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked about 5 paces behind their husbands. She returned to Kabul recently and observed that women still walk behind their husbands, but now seem to walk even further back and are happy with the old custom. Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, "Why do you now seem happy with the old custom that you used to try and change?" "Land mines," said the woman. MORAL: BEHIND EVERY MAN IS A SMART WOMAN', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time there was a mother duck and a father duck who had seven baby ducklings. Six of them were regular-looking ducklings. The seventh was a REALLY ugly duckling. Everyone used to say, "What a nice-looking bunch of ducklings--- all except that one. Boy, he''s really ugly." The really ugly duckling heard these people, but he didn''t care. He knew that ONE day, he would probably grow up to be a swan, and be bigger and look better than anything in the pond. * * * * * * * * WELL, AS IT TURNED OUT, HE WAS JUST A REALLY UGLY DUCKLING. AND HE GREW UP TO BE JUST A REALLY UGLY DUCK. THE END.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was at a strip club, and he had glitter all over him, but he didn''t know it. He got in his car, and drove home, and it was about 11:30 when he got home. His wife was standing at the door when he got home. He kissed her, then told her that he was tired and wanted to go to sleep. His wife stopped him before he went upstairs to their room. She asked, "So why do you have glitter all over you?" Her husband thought quick and replied meekly, "Makin'' you a card..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was Father''s Day, and Little Billy''s mom told him to tell his dad to just lay around, watch TV, and do nothing productive. So Little Billy went into the family room where he found his dad watching TV. Little Billy said, "Dad, it''s Father''s Day, so mom and me think that you should just lay around, watch TV, and do nothing productive." His dad looked up from the TV and smiled, then went back to watching his show. Little Billy paused a moment and said, "You know, just like you usually do..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A stingy old lawyer who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness was determined to prove wrong the saying, "You can''t take it with you." After much thought and consideration, the old ambulance-chaser finally figured out how to take at least some of his money with him when he died. He instructed his wife to go to the bank and withdraw enough money to fill two pillow cases. He then directed her to take the bags of money to the attic and leave them directly above his bed. His plan: When he passed away, he would reach out and grab the bags on his way to heaven. Several weeks after the funeral, the deceased lawyer''s wife, up in the attic cleaning, came upon the two forgotten pillow cases stuffed with cash. "Oh, that darned old fool," she exclaimed. "I knew he should have had me put the money in the basement."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An attorney telephoned the governor just after midnight, insisting that he talk to him regarding a matter of utmost urgency. An aide eventually agreed to wake up the governor. "So, what is it?" grumbled the governor. "Judge Garber has just died," said the attorney, "and I want to take his place." The governor replied: "Well, it''s OK with me if it''s OK with the undertaker."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was driving her brand new, VERY expensive, Mustang convertible, when she saw her brunette friend. She thought that this was her chance to brag about it, so she drove over to her. The brunette recognized her, and said, "Hey!" The blonde smiled; this was her chance. She said, "Hey, look what I got that you don''t have!" patting her convertible. The brunette smiled sweetly back and said, "Well, look what I got that YOU don''t have," patting her brain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? I''m a pile up. I''m a pile up who? Yes, you are a pile of poo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BOB- It''s Friday the 13th. Do you have any superstitions? GEORGE- I think it''s unlucky to have superstitions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do black people have white hands? A: Everyone has a little good in them', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story: A rather well-proportioned secretary, Joan, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel. She wore a bathing suit the first day but, on the second, she decided that no one could see her wayyy up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan. She''d hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs; she was lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear. "Excuse me, miss," said the flustered little assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs. "The Hilton doesn''t mind you sunbathing on the roof but we would very much appreciate you wearing a bathing suit as you did yesterday." "What difference does it make?" Joan asked rather calmly. "No one can see me up here, and besides, I''m covered with a towel." "Not exactly," said the embarrassed little man. "You''re lying on the dining room skylight."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call it, when a bison gets a loan? A: A Buffa-loan!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Daddy: Get the Nuts son Bobby: Yes Dad Daddy: Ouch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a guy were out on a date and they ended up at "Lovers Cove" where they were making out. The guy thought that things were going pretty good and maybe he would get lucky tonight, so he thought that he would ask her if she wanted to go in the back seat. "NO!" yelled the blonde. The guy just figured that she wasn''t ready yet. Things got pretty hot and the guy thought he would try again. "NO!" the blonde yelled again. Things got even hotter and the blond was down to her bra and the guy even had her pants unzipped. "Do you wanna go in the back seat yet?" asked the guy. "For the last time, NO!" said the blonde. Frustrated, the guy asked, "Well, why the hell not?" The blonde looked at him and said, "Because I wanna stay up here with you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Diner: I can''t eat such a rotten chicken.Call the manager! Waiter: It''s no use. He won''t eat it either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was searching the dictionary for the word ''Dictionary''. He found this meaning: Dictionary is the thing you are holding, Stupid. Wondering what the definition of stupid was, he searched for the word stupid, he found: Is that you again?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. "Hurry!" she said, "stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. "Don''t move until I tell you to," she whispered. "Just pretend you''re a statue." "What''s this, honey?" the husband inquired as he entered the room. "Oh, it''s just a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too." No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep. Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk. "Here," he said to the ''statue'', "eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths for three days and nobody offered me as much as a glass of water."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('--That comment about Elton being "twice the woman" she ever was. --Caught Eminem fantasizing about killing other women. --Sick of hiding her love for the Insane Clown Posse. --Sure, he talks and raps like a black man, but when he takes down his pants... -', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was playing with his father''s wallet when he accidently swallowed a quarter. He went crying to his mom, choking on the quarter. They took him to a doctor, who said that the quarter was impossible to remove without surgery, they consulted a specialist who was of the same opinion. Then came a man who said he could get the money out in a jiffy. He turned little Johnny upside down and patted him with great precision on the back of neck and, sure enough, the quarter rolled out. Everyone was amazed, the father said "You must be an expert!" The man replied, "No sir I''m just a tax collector."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During class, a teacher trying to teach good manners asks the students, one by one - "John, if you were on a date, having supper with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?" "Just a minute, I have to go piss." The teacher replied "That would be rude and impolite!" "What about you, Michael, how would you say it?" "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I''ll be right back." The teacher responded, "That''s better, but it''s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the table." "And you, Billy, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners?" "I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment, I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you''ll get to meet after supper." The teacher fainted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was doing his homework, and it was some sort of code where you had to fill in which letter is which, i.e. the letter a = 1, b = 2, d = 4, etc. He got to one that he didn''t know which number it was, and he decided to ask his father, who was sitting on the couch next to him. Little Johnny said, "Hey dad, can you tell me what the 25th letter of the alphabet is?" The dad answered, "Y." Little Johnny said, "Because I wanna know. Gosh, do you know it or not?" The dad said, "Y, son!" Little Johnny said, "Because I wanna know, and if you want to deny it again, then you are more of a *&^%ing *&^%$ than a ^&*# on a %$#@! The dad took this hard, and said meekly, "It''s the letter ''y'', son." Little Johnny said, "Oh, thank you, dad. So I guess this would be a bad time to ask for a raise for my allowance, eh?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. They merely change the standard to darkness and upgrade the customers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was singing. One of the guests turned to a man by his side and criticized the singer. "What a terrible voice!" he said. "Do you know who she is?" "Yes," was the answer. "She is my wife." "Oh, I beg your pardon." The man said, "Of course her voice is not bad, but the song is very bad. I wonder who wrote that awful song." "I did." was the answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I studied and studied and came up with a conclusion 1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL. 2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING. 3. The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL. 4. The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL. 5. The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS. 6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is GOLF. AMAZING CONCLUSION: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the book have to go to the hospital? Because it injured its spine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eminem/ M & M: I don''t like the rapper, but I like the candy inside the wrapper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You know you''re a redneck when you go out with your girlfriend and you don''t realize she has her other boyfriend with her. 2. You know you''re a redneck when you use a barstool as a walker. 3. You know you''re a redneck when your mowing your lawn and you find a car. 4. You know you''re a redneck when you fall asleep with one hand down your pants and a beer in the other hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This little boy asked his mother one day why his father had no hair. His mother replied, "Well dear, that''s because he thinks alot." Having prided herself with coming up with such a wonderful answer she heard her son say, "Gee mommy I''m sure glad you don''t think ''cause you''d look funny with no hair!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck when your brand new tv is sitting on your old ones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s only funny until someone gets hurt... Then it''s hilarious!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A baby turtle was standing at the bottom of a large tree and with a deep sigh, started to climb. About an hour later, he reached a very high branch and walked along to the end. He turned and spread all four flippers and launched himself off the branch. When he landed at the bottom in a pile of soft, dead leaves, he shook himself off, walked back to the bottom of the tree, and with a sigh started to climb. About an hour later, he again reached the very high branch, walked along, turned, spread his flippers and flung himself off the branch. Again, he landed on the bottom, shook himself off, went to the bottom of the tree, sighed and started climbing. Watching these proceedings from the end of the branch were two little birds. Mommy bird turned to Daddy bird and said, "Don''t you think it''s time we told him he was adopted?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest and a minister were going on vacation (seperately) when their flight got postponed. They meet each other and deside to go across the street to a bar until their flight. Little did they know, it was a gay bar. When a man started hitting on the priest he grew fruious and the gay man stalked off. A little while later a big, buff man walks over to the priest and says "Why the Hell did you start screaming at my boyfriend for no reason?" The minister, seeing that the priest was at a loss of words, takes the big man out of earshot of the priest and talks to him. After he comes back without the big man, the priest asks him, "What did you say to him?" The minister calmly repies "I told him that we were on our way to our honeymoon and our flight got posponed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, "Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large." Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, "We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows." The conversation has, meanwhile, almost died when the Texan sees a mob of kangaroos hopping through the field. He asks, "And what are those?" The Aussie, fed up with the Texan''s bragging replies with an incredulous look, "What, don''t you have any grasshoppers in Texas?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist. "I''m on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me." Psychiatrist: "Don''t you have a phone in your car?" Blonde: "That was a little too expensive, so I did the next best thing. I put a mailbox in my car." Psychiatrist: "Uh ... How''s that working?" Blonde: "Actually, I haven''t gotten any letters yet." Psychiatrist: "And why do you think that is?" Blonde: "I figure it''s because when I''m driving around, my zip code keeps changing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mammas breath so nasty that when she burps her teeth have to duck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The master, to impress on his pupils the need of thinking before speaking, told them to count to fifty before saying anything important, and to one hundred if it was very important. The next day he was speaking, standing with his back to the fire, when he noticed several lips moving rapidly. Suddenly the whole class shouted: "Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, a hundred. Your coat is on fire, sir!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went into your house, took a booger off the wall and yo mamma told me not to touch the family portrait.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mom is so stupid she tried to wake up a sleeping bag.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so ugly, when she walks down the street in September, people say, "Damn! Is it Halloween already?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This man goes along to the Patent Office with some of his new designs. He says to the clerk, "I''d like to register my new invention. It''s a folding bottle." "OK," says the clerk. "What do you call it?" "A fottle," replies the inventor. "A fottle? That''s stupid! Can''t you think of something else?" "I can think about it. I''ve got something else though. It''s a folding carton." "And what do you call that?" asks the clerk. "A farton", replies the inventor. "That''s rude. You can''t possibly call it that!" "In that case," says the inventor... "You''re really going to hate the name of my folding bucket."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a non-conforming sparrow who decided not to fly south for the winter. However, soon the weather turned so cold that he reluctantly started to fly south. In a short time, ice began to form on his wings and he fell to earth in a barnyard, almost frozen. A cow passed by and crapped on the little sparrow. The sparrow thought it was the end. But, the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings. Warm and happy, able to breathe, he started to sing. Just then a large cat came by and, hearing the chirping, investigated the sounds. The cat cleared away the manure, found the chirping bird and promptly ate him. The moral of the story: 1.) Everyone who craps on you is not necessarily your enemy. 2.) Everyone who gets you out of the crap is not necessarily your friend. 3.) And, if you''re warm and happy in a pile of crap, keep your mouth shut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the clock say to the wristwatch? "I enjoyed tocking with you, but now you''re starting to tick me off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vegetable: "Hey, lets get married." Fruit: "I''m sorry." Vegetable: "We could secretly get married." Fruit: "No, we couldn''t." Vegetable: "Why?" Fruit: "Because we can''t elope." Can''t elope = cantelope', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what style of shoes a frog loves most? Open toad!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Jimmy, Little Billy, and Jimmy''s father were at an Art Museum. Little Jimmy was looking at a picture of someone in a carriage being pulled by a horse. Little Jimmy brought his father over to look at the picture, and he asked his father, "Daddy, what is this?" His dad replied, "Why, that is a horse-drawn carriage!" Little Jimmy excitedly ran over to Little Billy, brought him back to the picture, and said, "Billy, a horse drew this picture!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde''s son was playing catch with his friend. The blonde was working in the yard, planting flowers and such. Her son was throwing the baseball back and forth with his friend when he suddenly smiled. He threw the baseball straight at his blonde mom, and yelled, "Think Fast!!!" so the blonde said silently to herself, "Fast, fast, fast, fast..." The blonde got herself hit right plop in the head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Momma''s teeth are so yellow that when she smiles people SLOW DOWN!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t drink and drive, you''ll spill your beer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women are like beer. They look good, smell good, taste good, and feel good. But after a while you gotta have another beer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so stupid, she got stabbed in a shoot-out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so poor, she wore her McDonalds uniform to church.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of monkey eats chips? A chipmunk!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a list of the worst names to have Dick Hurtz Hary Paratesticles Mike Hunt Mike Rotch Anitta Manwhore Anitta Johnson Fuk Yao Ike Anblow Peter Pecker I.C. Weiner I.P. Freely Seimore Butts Bo Oobless Dick Less Issac Less Tits McGee (ok, that was off Anchorman) Ima Hornibusterd Ima Uglibech Ima Dick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks up to a doctor and asks: "What type of questions do you ask people to decide if they are retarded or not?" "I ask questions like; If you had to empty a bathtub that was full of water, and I gave you a teaspoon, a bucket, and a cup, how would you get the water out?" "Oh I see," the man said, "a sensible man would use the bucket because it is bigger." "No, a sensible person would pull the plug."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, Doctor! My friend has only 59 seconds to live. "Don''t worry, I''ll be there in a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I work at Bed, Bath and Beyond in the ''Beyond'' dept.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If to give a man a fish, he eats for a day, but if you teach a man to fish... He has to buy a license, poles, bait, and sit on his behind for four hours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb? A. Hey, let''s go ride bikes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Artery: Study of paintings Bacteria: Backdoor to cafeteria Barium: What to do when treatment fails Bowel: Letter like A E I O or U Ceasarean Section: District in Rome Cat Scan: Searching for Kitty Cauterize: Made eye contact with her Coma: Punctuation Mark Congenital: Friendly D & C: Where Washington is Dilate: To live long Enema: Not a friend Fester: Quicker Genital: Non-Jewish Hang Nail: Coat Hook Impotent: Distinguished, well known Labor pain: Hurt at work Morbid: Higher offer Nitrate: Cheeper than day Node: Was aware of Outpatient: Person fainted Post op: Letter Carrier Recovery Room: Place to apholster Rectum: Dang near Killed Him Rheumatic: Amorous Secretion: Hiding something Tablet: Small table Terminal Illness: Sick at Airport Tibia: Country in North Africa Tumor: More than One Urine: Opposite of ''you''re out'' Varicose: Nearby Vein: Conceited', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who can do binary and those who can''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ears pierced? A buck an ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. He says, "What are you doing?" She answers, "I''m moving to Las Vegas. I heard prostitutes there get paid $400 for doing what I do for you for free!" Later that night on her way out the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase. When she asks him where he''s going, he replies, "I''m going to Vegas too. I want to see you live on $800 a year!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man left his cat with his brother while he went on vacation for a week. When he came back, he called his brother to see when he could pick the cat up. The brother hesitated, then said, "I''m so sorry, but while you were away, the cat died." The man was very upset and yelled, "You know, you could have broken the news to me better than that. When I called today, you could have said he was on the roof and wouldn''t come down. Then when I called the next day, you could have said that he had fallen off and the vet was working on patching him up. Then when I called the third day, you could have said he had passed away." The brother thought about it and apologized. "So how''s Mom?" asked the man. "She''s on the roof and won''t come down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('OK, let''s consider the physical evidence. The moon is moving away at a tiny, although measurable distance from the Earth every year. Do the math and you will clearly see that 85 million years ago it was orbiting the earth at a distance of about 35 feet from the earth''s surface. This would explain the death of the dinosaurs; the tallest ones, anyway', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There where two snakes talking. The 1st one said, "Sidney, are we the type of snake who wrap ourselves around our prey and squeeze and crush until they''re dead? Or are we the type of snake who ambush our prey and bite them and they are poisioned?" The second snake says, "Why do you ask?" The 1st one replies: "I just bit my lip!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so small, she held up a sign that said "Don''t spit, I can''t swim."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your dog farts and YOU claim it... you might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had parked his car in the supermarket parking lot and was walking past an empty cart, when he heard a female voice say, "Mister, are you using that cart?" "No," he answered..."I''m only after one thing." As he walked away he heard her murmur, "Typical male."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Emerging from the chiropractor''s treatment room, a young man said aloud, "I feel like a new man!" "I do, too," a middle-aged woman responded, "but I''ll probably go home with the same old one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she doesnt have dreams... she has MOTION PICTURES!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys were at the gym. Bob asked Ben, "How did the date go with my sister?" Bob replied, "I didn''t know your sister was famous. When I took her to the opera, and when it was over no one would leave until she stood up and sang."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lion woke up one morning feeling really rowdy and mean. He went out and cornered a small monkey and roared, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?" The trembling monkey says, "You are, mighty lion!" Later, the lion confronts a ox and fiercely bellows, "Who is the mightiest of all jungle animals?" The terrified ox stammers, "Oh great lion, you are the mightiest animal in the jungle!" On a roll now, the lion swaggers up to an elephant and roars, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?" Fast as lightning, the elephant snatches up the lion with his trunk, slams him against a tree half a dozen times leaving the lion feeling like he''d been run over by a safari wagon. The elephant then stomps on the lion till he looks like a corn tortilla and ambles away. The lion lets out a moan of pain, lifts his head weakly and hollers after the elephant - "Just because you don''t know the answer, you don''t have to get so upset about it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How did the blonde die drinking milk? A: The cow fell on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do peroxide blondes and black men have in common? A: They both have black roots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call it when a blonde dyes their hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy Bob and Lester were talking one afternoon when Billy Bob told Lester, "Ya know, I reckon I''m about ready for a vacation. Only this year I''m gonna do it a little different. The last few years, I took your suggestions as to where to go. Three years ago you said to go to Hawaii. I went to Hawaii and Marie got pregnant. Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Marie got pregnant again. Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Marie didn''t get pregnant again!" Lester asks Billy Bob, "So, what you gonna do this year that''s different?" Billy Bob says, "This year, I''m takin'' Marie with me..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so funky, they closed the beaches for a week after she drained her bath water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so poor she can''t even pay attention.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the most common phrase in your house is "Somebody go jiggle the handle!"... you might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is more peculiar than watching a catfish? Watching a goldfish bowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three prisoners who were about to be executed by the electric chair. The guards strapped down the first one, a Frenchman, onto the chair, and they asked him for his last words. "Vive la France!" he said, meaning ''Long live France''. When they pulled the switch, nothing happened. Everyone was amazed and thought that a miracle had occurred. The Frenchman was saved from death and released. The guards strapped the second one, an Englishman, in the chair. When asked for his last words, he said, "Long live the Queen!" Again, when they pulled the switch, nothing happened. He was saved and released. When they asked the last prisoner who was an Irishman for his last words, he said, "Do you know why the other two prisoners escaped death? It''s because you stupid blokes forget to plug in the cable!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard''s DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn''t solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and yellow. For instance, green is a combination of cyan and yellow, but green printed fine. Every color of the rainbow printed fine except for yellow. I had the customer change ink cartridges. I had the customer delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing worked. I asked my co-workers for help; they offered no new ideas. After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, "Should I try printing on a piece of white paper instead of this "yellow" construction paper?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gang of robbers broke into a lawyer''s club by mistake. The old legal lions gave them a fight for their life and their money. The gang was very happy to escape. "It ain''t so bad," one crook noted. "We got $50 between us." The boss screamed: "I warned you to stay clear of lawyers.... we had $100 when we broke in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the banana go to the doctors? Because it wasn''t peeling well', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do elephants always bring on holiday? A trunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a football pitch so cold? Because of all the fans', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are Martians favorite sweets? Mars-mallows.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you give a sick pig? Oinkment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which fish is the most valuable in the sea? A goldfish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What type of saw cuts the sea? A see-saw.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the noisiest part of a tree? Its bark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever been to KFC? Ever notice that sometimes their toilets do not provide toilet rolls? Reason being that they uphold their motto: "It''s finger licking good!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four football fans go rock climbing one afternoon: a Patriots fan, a Falcons fan, an Eagles fan, and a Steelers fan. They had been arguing all the way up the mountain about who among them was the most "die-hard" fan. Upon reaching the top of the mountain, the Patriots fan proclaimed to the other three... "This is for the New England Patriots!" and promptly threw himself off the mountain as a form of sacrifice. Not to be outdone by a Patriots fan, the Falcons fan jumped up and said... "This is for the Atlanta Falcons!" and then threw himself off the mountain, again as a form of sacrifice. Refusing to be outdone by the Patriots and Falcons fans, the Steelers fan rose to his feet and yelled at the top of his lungs, "This is for the Pittsburgh Steelers!" and without hesitation, pushed the Philadelphia Eagles fan off the mountain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman and her goose walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why''d you bring the pig in the bar?" The woman answered, "I do believe this is a goose!" The bartender says, "I was talking to the goose!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young cowboy walked into a seedy cafe in a small town in western Oklahoma. He sat at the counter and noticed an older cowboy with his arms folded staring blankly at a bowl of chili. After about 15 minutes of just sitting there staring at it, the young cowboy bravely asked, "If you ain''t gonna eat that, mind if I do?" The older cowboy slowly turns his head toward the young wrangler and in his best cowboy manner states, "Nah, go ahead." Eagerly, the young cowboy reached over and slid the bowl over to his place and started spooning it in with delight. He got nearly down to the bottom of the bowl and noticed a rotten, dead rat in the chili. The sight was shocking and he immediately puked up the chili into the bowl. The old cowboy quietly said, "Yup, that''s as far as i got, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family of moles had been hibernating all winter. One beautiful spring morning, they woke up. The father mole stuck his head out of the hole and looked around. "Mother Mole!" He called back down the hole. "Come up here! I smell honey, fresh made honey!" The mother mole ran up and squeezed in next to him. "That''s not honey, that''s maple syrup! I smell maple syrup!" The baby mole, still down in the hole, was sulking. "I can''t smell anything down here but molasses..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A journalist assigned to the Jerusalem bureau takes an apartment overlooking the Wailing Wall. Every day when she looks out, she sees an old Jewish man praying vigorously. So, the journalist goes down and introduces herself to the old man. She asks, "You come every day to the wall. How long have you done that, and what are you praying for?"The old man replies, "I have come here to pray every day for 25 years. In the morning I pray for world peace and then for the brotherhood of man. I go home, have a cup of tea, and I come back and pray for the eradication of illness and disease from the earth." The journalist is amazed. "How does it make you feel to come here every day for 25 years and pray for these things?" she asks. The old man looks at her sadly. "Like I''m talking to a wall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a fatal bus accident and the only survivor was a monkey. In order to fill in the blanks of the event, the police had hired a monkey trainer that could speak sign language with the monkey. The trainer first asked the monkey if he had actually been on the bus. The monkey nodded yes. The trainer then asked the monkey what was going on in the bus just before the accident. The monkey made hand motions to signal that there had been some heavy drinking of alcohol going on. The trainer motioned, "I see, what else was going on?" To this, the monkey made gestures to show people smoking marijuana. The trainer motioned, "Isee, what else was going on?" To this, the monkey depicted with his hands that everyone was having sex. The trainer, conviced of what actually happened, then asked the monkey, "What were you doing while all this was going on?" The monkey replied, "looking over my shoulder while I was driving the bus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a chicken with a monkey? George W. Bush', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s grosser than gross? When you find a used tampon in your ketchup bottle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s grosser than gross? When you''re eating a bowl of rice crispies and one gets up and slithers away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mouth has turned into a flower bed. It has tulips.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the police station, Bubba explained to the police officer why his cousins shot him. "Well," Bubba began, "We wuz havin'' a good time drinking, when my cousin Ray picked up his shotgun and said, ''Hey, der ya fellows wanna go huntin''?''" "And then what happened?" the officer interrupted. "From what I remember," Bubba said, "I stood up and said, ''Sure, I''m game.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a doctor''s office. He says, "Doctor, doctor, you''ve got to help me! My elbow keeps coming untied. . . my belly button is out of order. . . I can''t open my chest. . . I''m losing the leaves in my palm. . . somebody threw my waist in the trash. . . and my foot is only eleven inches!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks in to the hospital to visit her husband. She talks to the doctor, and the doctor says,"I have bad news, and worse news." The woman starts to cry, asking for the bad news first. The doctor replies,"The bad news is that your husband only has 24 hours to live." The woman starts to cry even more, and now asks for the worse news. The Doctor now replies,"The worse news is that I have been trying to contact you since yesterday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a man and a condom? Condoms have changed. They''re no longer thick and insensitive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a man''s ultimate embarrassment? Having an erection, walking into a wall, and hurting his nose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of sign does a prostitute hang on her door when she goes on vacation? "GO SCREW YOURSELF!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What''s six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? A. Money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went to an eye doctor to have her eyes checked for glasses. The doctor directed her to read various letters with the left eye while covering the right eye. The blonde was so mixed up on which eye was which that the eye doctor in disgust took a paper sack with a hole to see through, and put it on her head to cover up the appropriate eye and asked her to read the letters. As he did so, he noticed the blonde had tears streaming down her face. "Look," said the doctor, "there''s no need to get upset about getting glasses." "I know," agreed the blonde, "but I kind of had my heart set on wire frames."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look at ME! boasted the fit old man, pounding a very flat and firm stomach, having just finished 100 situps before a group of young people. "Fit as a fiddle! And you want to know why? I don''t smoke, I don''t drink, I don''t stay up late, and I don''t chase after loose women!" He smiled at them, teeth white, eyes aglitter, "And tomorrow -- tomorrow, I''m going to celebrate my *90th* birthday!" "Oh, really?" drawled one of the young onlookers, "How?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man arrives at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells him that he will remain frozen until his whole family is there. That way, it would stop him from doing anything NOT with his family. So, a couple years pass, and his wife appeared in heaven. She had died of age. She was frozen along with her spouse. One more year passes, and one of their two kids arrive. He had died because he was shot. He was frozen along with them. They all watch many more people enter heaven. They suddenly saw the milkman enter heaven. He did NOT have any family; he was adopted. But for some reason, he was frozen along with them. The woman and the milkman''s eyes each grew very big. Finally, the last kid died of age MANY years later, and the woman, the angry husband, the milkman, and the 2 kids all were released from being frozen to go to heaven.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always be smarter than the inanimate object that you''re working with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man said to his golfing friend, "I hit two of my best balls yesterday!" "Oh yeah?" "Yeah, I stepped on a rake in the bunker."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the first 4 words in the Mexican National Anthem? "Attention all K-Mart shoppers"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the turtle cross the road? A:To get to the shell gas station!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Spanish man with a rubber toe? Answer: Roberto.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A biker walks into a yuppie bar and shouts, "All lawyers are assholes!" He looks around, obviously hoping for a challenge. Finally a guy comes up to him, taps him on the shoulder, and says, "Take that back." The biker says, "Why? Are you a lawyer?" "No, I''m an asshole."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a couple of kids named "Poop", "Shut-Up", and "Manners" were on a bus. All of a sudden Poop falls out of the window! Manners jumps out of the bus to save him. So, Shut-Up runs to the bus driver to get some help. The bus driver asks him, "What''s your name?!" "Shut-Up." At this point the bus driver is mad. He asks, "Where are your manners?!" Shut-Up replies, "Outside picking up Poop."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever wonder why bottled water costs so much when there is so much of it? Spell "evian" backwards.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 3 religious truths: Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian Faith Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ok, If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the Jags, and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers known as Bucs, what does that make the Tennessee Titans?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The children begged for a hamster, and after the usual fervent vows that they alone would care for it, they got one. They named it Danny. Two months later, when Mom found herself responsible for cleaning and feeding the creature, she located a prospective new home for it. The children took the news of Danny''s imminent departure quite well, though one of them remarked, "He''s been around here a long time - we''ll miss him." "Yes," Mom replied, "But he''s too much work for one person, and since I''m that one person, I say he goes." Another child offered, "Well, maybe if he wouldn''t eat so much and wouldn''t be so messy, we could keep him." But Mom was firm. "It''s time to take Danny to his new home now," she insisted. "Go and get his cage." With one voice and in tearful outrage the children shouted, "Danny? We thought you said Daddy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends were talking. The first one said to the other, "Hey, have you seen the movie, "Constipated" yet?" The other replied, "Of course not! It hasn''t come out yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Students... Take Note: Knowledge is power ... But power corrupts ... And corruption is a crime ... And crime doesn''t pay ... So if you keep on studying you''ll go broke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Alabama State Trooper Patrol cars were in hot pursuit of a Camaro heading east towards Georgia on I-90. When the suspect crossed the Georgia line, the first trooper pulled over immediately. The rookie Trooper pulled over right behind him and asked, "Sarge, why''d you stop?" "You dumb rookie," replied the Sarge. "He''s in Georgia now. They''re an hour ahead of us, so we''ll never catch him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After every line I type, say out loud to yourself, Hairy Pickle There once was a guy named He lived in a town called Nobody did like So they hung him buy his', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid, she thought that Tiger Woods was a place that was dangerous.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What''s with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don''t know, but I''ve never seen such ineptitude!" The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let''s have a word with him." "Hi George. Say, what''s with that group ahead of us? They''re rather slow, aren''t they?" The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that''s a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That''s so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. And I''m going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there''s anything he can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can''t these guys play at night?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fishing season hasn''t opened and a fisherman who doesn''t have a license, is casting for trout as a stranger approaches and asks: "Any luck?" "Any luck? This is a wonderful spot. I took 10 out of this stream yesterday," he boasts. "Is that so? By the way, do you know who I am?" asks the stranger. "Nope." "Well, meet the new game warden." "Oh," gulped the fisherman. "Well, do you know who I am?" "Nope." "Meet the biggest liar in the state!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of young boys were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track. All of a sudden, the Game Warden jumped out of the bushes. Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like a bat out of hell. The Game Warden was hot on his heels. After about a half mile, the young man stopped and stooped over with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath, so the Game Warden finally caught up to him. "Let''s see yer fishin'' license, Boy!" the Warden gasped. With that, the boy pulled out his wallet and gave the Game Warden a valid fishing license. "Well, son," said the Game Warden. "You must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don''t have to run from me if you have a valid license!" "Yes, sir," replied the young guy. "But my friend back there, well, he don''t have one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the best fishermen in the state? Master Baiters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so stupid, she tried to cut through a safe with a Laser Tag gun!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young brunette used to always wonder why her blonde best friend would get A''s on all her tests and the brunette would get A-''s. She thought that was a little weird, so one day she asked her friend why she got better grades, and her friend said that she just copied the answers out of her book, so the brunette said, "But none of them were open book," and the blonde says, "Oh, that might explain why no one was using their books!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The law of drunkenness- You can''t fall off the floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn''t have to do it himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I didn''t lose my mind, I just let it wander and it never came back. I miss it so much.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond, brunette, and redhead are talking. The blond asks the brunette, "Where did you get those hair streaks?" She answers, "Its natural." The brunette asks the redhead the same question. "Its natural." she answers. The redhead and brunette ask the blond, "How did you get that green streak in your hair?" She answers, "Phhnnnggg," (As she blows her nose on her hand and puts it through her hair) "Its natural.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat she tried on Orion''s belt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus. So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don''t you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy." The blind man replies, "If you would''ve put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick, we''d be riding the bus, so shut the hell up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was soooo ugly when I was born that my mum got morning sickness after I was born. The doctor came in to the waiting room after I was born and told my dad, "We did everything we could, but he pulled through." I''ve never been able to understand why my bath toys were a radio and a toaster. And when I play in the sandpit, the cat always covers me up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('14 THINGS PMS STANDS FOR Pass My Shotgun Psychotic Mood Shift Perpetual Munching Spree Puffy Mid-Section People Make Me Sick Provide Me with Sweets Pardon My Sobbing Pimples May Surface Pass My Sweatpants Pissy Mood Syndrome Plainly; Men Suck Pack My Stuff Permanent Menstrual Syndrome', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a blond and a toothbrush? A: You don''t lend a toothbrush to your best friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the female math book that lived underwater wearing? An algae-bra', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the boy wear a diaper to the party? A: He didn''t want to be a party pooper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you do when your nose goes on strike? A: Pick it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the depths of the countryside there lived a farmer who took care of baby animals. The farm was very peaceful until one day the farmer''s pig was murdered. Now the farmer took this incident very seriously, so he started an investigation. Unfortunately, the only witness the farmer had to this murder was his pet bunny rabbit. Since the rabbit was unable to speak and tell him who murdered the little pig, the farmer lined up his four prime suspects, a cow, a horse, a goat, and a duck, and told the rabbit to pick out who had committed the dirty deed. The rabbit hopped up and down the line, checking each animal, and then finally hopped forward three feet, and stopped in front of the goat. "It wasn''t me! It wasn''t me!" yelled the goat. The farmer shook his head and said, "The hare''s looking at you, kid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FRIEND: You don''t look so good, what''s wrong? HARRY: I got domestic trouble. FRIEND: But Harry you always said your wife was a pearl. HARRY: Yeah its the mother of pearl that''s the problem.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you recognize a blonde in school? A: They are the only ones who erase their notebook when the teacher erases the board.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rules for the dog- _______________________ 1. The dog is not allowed in the house. 2. Ok, the dog is allowed in the house, but only in certain parts. 3. The dog is allowed in all rooms, but has to stay off the furniture. 4. The dog can get on the old furniture only. 5. Fine, the dog allowed on all the furniture, but is not allowed to sleep with the humans on the bed. 6. Ok, the dog is allowed on the bed but by invitation only. 7. The dog can sleep on the bed whenever he wants, but not under the covers. 8. The dog can sleep under the covers by invitation only. 9. The dog can sleep under the covers every night. 10. Humans must ask permission to sleep under the covers with the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does a blonde do when it gets cold? A: Sits around a candle Q: What does she do when it gets really cold? A: Lights it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young lady came home from a date looking rather sad. She told her mother, "Arthur proposed to me an hour ago." "Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked. "Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn''t even believe there''s a hell." Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we''ll show him how wrong he is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The football players were doing very well in their games, but when it came to academics, they were failing. So the administrater of the school, who desired all of his students to graduate, talked to the coach of the football team and said, "Coach, if ONE of your football players can answer a single math problem, I will not get rid of the football team, but if he gets it wrong, I''m afraid I will have to throw out the team. When the team was gathered up and a player was selected to answer the problem, the administrator asked him, "Okay, what is 3 + 4?" The football player thought and thought and thought and thought. After five hours and multiple countings on his fingers, the player said, "Seven!" The coach raised his arms and pleaded, "Give him another chance, please!!!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks the assistant for some rectum deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman they don''t sell rectum deodorant, and never have. Unfazed, the blonde assures the pharmacist that she has been buying the stuff from his store on a regular basis and would like some more. "I''m sorry," says the pharmacist, "we don''t have any." "But I always buy it here." says the blonde. "Do you have the container that it came in?" asks the pharmacist. "YES," said the blonde, "I''ll go home and get it." She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist who looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant" Annoyed, the blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container... "TO APPLY, PUSH UP BOTTOM."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A redneck taped toilet paper to his television. He said, "Hey, lookie here, now we have free paper view!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the ant fall off the toilet bowl? A: He got pissed off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A road crew is making a giant freeway, when they come across a sign and a lever. The sign reads "pull lever and end world". The workers decide not to pull the lever just in case. One night, a man named Nate is driving home. He does not see the sign, so he gets out of his car, and crosses the road to pull the lever. But, on his way there, he was run over by the car, and was never to be seen again. The moral of the story? Better Nate Than Lever!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young husband with an inferiority complex insisted he was just a little pebble on the beach. The marriage counselor told him, "If you wish to save your marriage, you''d better be a little boulder."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newlywed couple was walking together, and needed to cross a busy street. They saw Officer Ed. He was controlling traffic, so he said to them in a sarcastic and nasty voice, "Oh, so you just want me to clear traffic so you snots can get across? Oh, sure, I''ll do that!" So the couple starts to thank him, when he says, "I don''t know why you''re walking on this nasty day, anyway! It''s just about to rain!" The couple looked up in the sky, but didn''t see a cloud in sight. They decided not to say anything, and went across the walkway as Officer Ed stopped the traffic. Although, sure enough, it started to rain as soon as they had crossed. It just so happens that the man and the woman were songwriters, and they wrote a classic Christmas tune. Oh, don''t you know it? It goes like this: "Rude Officer Ed knows the rain, dear..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was on a game show. He was on his final question; all he had to do was answer that question right, and he would win 1 million dollars! The game show host said, "All right, for your final question: ''What are the names of three of Santa''s reindeer?''" The man grinned and said, "Dasher!" The game show host said, "Correct!" "Comet!" "Correct! What is the last name?" The man yelled, "Olive!" The game show host was confused and said, "Why Olive?" The contestent looked at him strangely and said, "Oh, don''t you know? ''Olive, the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names...''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s weirder than a talking dog? A: A spelling bee!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s There? Cargo. Cargo Who? Car Go "Beep, Beep!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the news, Michael Jackson is broke and can''t even afford the payroll at Neverland Ranch. So the next time you see Michael with his hands in a 12-year-old''s pocket, he might just be looking for lunch money', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Live in a way such that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip. -- Will Rogers, Humorist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so broke, your bologna doesn''t have a first name.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kock-knock. Who''s there? Please. Please who? It''s the police! Open the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she goes to get the mail it measures on the Richter scale.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember- There''s a light at the end of every tunnel... just hope it''s not a train!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, "Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?" "I think so," the man replied. "My wife has made appetizers and we have a caterer coming to provide plenty of cookies and cakes for all of our guests." "I don''t mean that," the priest responded. "I mean, are you prepared spiritually?" "Oh, sure," came the reply. "I''ve got a keg of beer and a case of whiskey."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently, my redneck neighbors invited me to a party. Here was our conversation: "Hey dude! Where are you man? We''re having a great party over here. Why don''t you come on over and join us?" I replied, "Man, I''m not feeling so good. I think I''m gonna stay right here." "Well, hey. What''cha got?" they asked. "I got a case of diarrhea," I responded. "Well heck, bring it along. These fools will drink anything!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young woman had just purchased her dream car, a new Ferrari convertible, and was having trouble tuning her radio to a station she wanted. She returned to the dealership and confronted the salesman, complaining about the radio. "Miss," the salesperson said, "this is a very sophisticated radio. There is no requirement to use the buttons or dials. You merely give voice commands to whatever type of program you desire." So after she received her instructions, she headed out on the highway. "Country Music," she said, and instantly a country crooner was singing away on a country station. After a while she said, "Oldies," and instantly she heard "Blueberry Hill." A few minutes later, a guy in a new Cadillac cut her off in traffic. "Stupid, inconsiderate prick!" she yelled. The radio paused for a second, and then she heard, "Hello again and welcome back to the program. This is Dr. Phil."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gay man, finally deciding he could no longer hide his sexuality from his parents, went over to their house, and found his mother in the kitchen cooking dinner. He sat down at the kitchen table, let out a big sigh, and said, "Mom, I have something to tell you: I''m gay." His mother made no reply or gave any response, and the guy was about to repeat it to make sure she''d heard him, when she turned away from the pot she was stirring and said calmly, "You''re gay, doesn''t that mean you have oral sex with other men?" The guy said nervously, "Uh, yeah, Mum, that''s right." His mother went back to stirring the pot, then suddenly whirled around and WHACKED him over the head with her spoon and said, "Don''t you EVER complain about the taste of my cooking again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between boogers and broccoli? Kids don''t eat broccoli.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish my name was Gary Boone! Do you wanna know why? Because, then, my name could be goon... you see, because you take the "G" from Gary and the "oone" from Boone to get Goon! But, you know, that''s not the worst nickname. The person that does have the worst nickname is my friend, Phil Hart. I can''t even tell you what we call him...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "Johnny, what is the outside of a tree called?" Johnny: "I don''t know." Teacher: "Bark, Johnny, bark." Johnny: "Bow, wow, wow!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Enter MEXICO illegally. Never mind immigration quotas, visas, international law, or any of that nonsense. Once there, demand that the local government provide free medical carefor you and your entire family. Try driving around as a Gringo in Mexico with no liability insurance,and have an accident. Demand bilingual nurses and doctors. Demand free bilingual local government forms, bulletins, etc. Procreate abundantly. Deflect any criticism of this allegedly irresponsible reproductive behavior with, "It is a cultural UnitedStates thing. You would not understand, pal." Demand classes on American culture in the Mexican school system. Demand a local Mexican driver license. This will afford other legalrights and will go far to legitimize your unauthorized, illegal,presence in Mexico. Insist that local Mexican law enforcement teach English to all itsofficers. This will never work in the real world. So why do we let them do it to us?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The inmate on death row was scheduled to be put to death by firing squad the follow morning. Throughout the day, the prison guards were being very nice to him. But when they asked him if he wanted something specific for his last meal, he said he didn''t want anything special. When they asked if there was something special he wanted to do, he said nothing. It went on like this all day. Finally, when he was put before the firing squad, the guard asked if he wanted a cigarette and a blindfold. "No," the inmate said, "just get it over with." "Well, is there anything that I can do for you before you go?" said the guard. "You didn''t even want a special last meal!" The inmate thought. "Actually," he said, "Music is my life. One thing I would really like would be to sing my favorite song, one whole time through, with no interruptions." The guard nodded and told him to go ahead. The inmate started, "One billion bottles of beer on the wall..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family was having some people to dinner. At the table, the mother turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, "Dear, would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn''t know what to say," replied the little girl, shyly. "Just say what you hear Mommy say, sweetie," the woman said. Her daughter took a deep breath, bowed her head, and solemnly said, "Dear Lord, why the heck did I invite all these people to dinner!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marajiuana, Jack got high and unzipped his fly and Jill said I don''t wanna.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently a family court judge was interviewing a 15 yr. old boy, asking him which parent he wanted to live with, his mother or father? The kid said he didn''t want to live with either one -- that both of them beat him all the time. The kid said he wanted to live with the Dallas Cowboys -- they never beat anybody!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One drunk to another: "Have you ever been so drunk you''d kiss a woman''s stomach?" Second drunk: "I''ve been drunker than that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black female is having trouble with her menses. She goes to the gynecologist and he asks: "Mrs. Williams, what kind of flow do you have?" "Linoleum" she replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a prostitute, your mistress and your wife? The prostitute says, "Are you done yet?" Your mistress says, "You''re not done yet!" And your wife says, "Beige, I think we ought to paint the ceiling beige."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Indian chief addressing the tribe says: "I''ve got good news an bad news. The bad news is 5000 college students just moved next door to the reservation ... good news is, they taste like buffalo."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a "fox" and a "dog?" About 6 drinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know in 1923, the following men were considered some of the world''s most successful men . . . at least they found the secret of making money. Whereas, in 1987, more than 60 yrs. later, do you know what became of these men? The president of the largest steel company, Charles Schwab, died a pauper. The president of the largest gas company, Howard Hopson, went insane. The president of the New York Stock Exchange, Richard Whitney, was released from prison to die at home. The greatest wheat speculator, Arthur Cooger, died abroad insolvent. The president of the Bank of International Settlement shot himself and the greatest bear on Wall Street, Casabee Rivermore, died by suicide. The same year, 1923, the winner of the most important golf championship, Gene Sarazen, won the US Open and the PGA tournaments. Today he is still playing golf and is solvent. Conclusion: Stop worrying about business and play golf!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Liberals want to solve the marijuana problem by making it legal. Conservatives want to solve the wife-beating problem by making it legal. Liberals want to strike down all abortion laws, so that unwanted babies can be killed off before they''re born. Conservatives want to strike down the welfare laws, so that unwanted babies can be starved to death after they''re born. The conservative would prevent rape by locking up his wife and daughters. The liberal would prevent rape by legalizing prostitution. Neither considers locking up rapists, because the liberal says it''s society''s fault and the conservative says it costs too much money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s impossible to be a participant in the march of time and not get a few blisters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a girl named Rachel. She had a cat named Love. One day, Rachel was taking a shower. When she got out, she yelled for her cat, Love, but saw that the cat had escaped. She was still in her towel but she walked outside anyways. A cop pulled around the corner and said, "Excuse me, Miss. What are you doing out here?" Rachel replied, "Looking for Love!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nobody can breathe out of their nose and mouth at the same time. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * You know, 95% of the people who read this try to do it...well, it''s impossible!!! DUH!!!! (lol)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two brunettes and a blonde are attempting to fix a roof. While they are on the roof, a herd of cattle run by and knock down the ladder and leave a big pile of poop behind. The two brunettes decide to make the blonde check how deep the poop is so they can jump down. So the blonde jumps down and yells, "It''s only ankle deep." So the two brunettes jump down and scream, "What are you talking about?! It''s up to our heads!" And the blonde replies, "Well, I jumped in head first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*Types Password* -Penis ~We''re sorry, the password you have entered isn''t long enough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma''s so fat that when she stepped on an air-plane she got arrested for 800 pounds of crack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are stuck in a foxhole with a cobra, Saddam Hussein, a lawyer, and only two bullets in your gun. What do you do? Shoot the lawyer twice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke is kind of dated but it''s still funny. Al Gore, Bill, Hilary, and Chelsea Clinton were all riding in the Airforce One. Out of the blue Gore says, "I could throw a hundred, one dollar bills out the window and make a hundred people happy." Bill says, "Well I could throw ten, ten dollar bills out the window, and make ten people very happy." Hilary, not wanting to be left out, says "Well I could throw one, one hundred dollar bill out the window and make one person extremely happy." Chelsea rolled her eyes and said "Well i could throw all three of you out the window and make the whole nation happy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was in high school I had a friend who had a wooden eye (this was a long time ago). He was very insecure about it. Come senior year he didn''t have a date for the Prom. There was a beautiful girl he liked, but had a hairlip (this gave her an extreme lisp) we decided to set them up. He goes up to her and asks her out to the Prom. She said, "Oh, wouldn''t I, wouldn''t I?" and he said, "Hairlip, hairlip." and they never spoke again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is the year 2032, and a father and his son walk the streets of lower Manhattan. Approaching the site where the WTC used to be in the end of the 20th century, the father sighs and comments, "To think that right here used to be the Twin Towers." The son, not understanding, asks his father "What were the Twin Towers?" The father smiles and looks at the son, and explains, "The Twin Towers were two huge buildings that used to be here until 2001, when the Arabs destroyed them." The son looks up to his father, and asks, "And what are the Arabs?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks out into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You''re just like Dave." "Who?" "This guy named Dave. He always did everything right. Like my coming along when you needed a cab. It would have happened like that to Dave." "There are always a few clouds over everybody." "Not Dave. He was a terrific athlete. He could have gone on the pro tour in tennis. He could golf with the pros, too. He sang like an opera baritone, and danced like a Broadway star." "He was something, huh?" "Oh, you don''t know the half of it. He had a memory like a trap. Could remember everybody''s birthday. He knew all about wine, which fork to eat with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change one light on the Christmas Tree and I black out the whole neighborhood." "No wonder you remember him." "Well, you would too, if you''d married HIS WIDOW."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young woman asks her mother, "Mom, how many kind of penises are there?" The mother, surprised, answers, "Well, a man goes through three phases. In a man''s twenties, a man''s penis is like an oak, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree." "A Christmas tree?" "Yes, dried up and the balls are there for decoration only."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SON SAYS: Daddy, how was I born? DAD SAYS: Ah, well, my son, one day you will need to find out anyway! Mom and Dad got together in a chat room on MSN. Dad set up a date via e-mail with your mom and we met at a cybercafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, and then your mother downloaded from dad''s memory stick. As soon as dad was ready for an upload, it was discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall. Since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later the blessed little virus appeared. And that''s the story.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband and wife are doing the spring house cleaning. Wife asks husband to hang some new curtain rods, but he can''t do it without toggle bolts. He sends her to the hardware store where she asks the man behind the counter for two toggle bolts. He puts them on the counter, then asks, "You wanna screw for these?" "No," she replies, "but I''ll blow you for the clock radio on the shelf."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde do when her computer freezes? She sticks it in the microwave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My sister-in-law, a truck driver, had decided to get a dog for protection. As she inspected a likely candidate, the trainer told her, "He doesn''t like men." "Perfect," my sister-in-law thought and took the dog. Then one day she was approached by two men in a parking lot, and she watched to see how her canine bodyguard would react. Soon it became clear that the trainer wasn''t kidding. As the men got closer, the dog ran under the nearest car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Helen Keller''s favorite color? Corduroy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man was sitting in his favorite chair watching football when his wife walked up behind him and knocked him over the head with a frying pan. When he woke he asked, "What the hell was that for?!?" "I found this piece of paper in your pants while I was doing your laundry and it says Mary Lou 555-5555. Who the hell is Mary Lou?!?" she asks. "Aww honey, that''s the name of the horse I was bettin'' on last week!" "Oh I''m so sorry honey!" Three weeks later she came behind him and knocked him over the head with a frying pan and once again he woke up asking, "What the hell did I do this time?!?" "Your horse called," she replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politics - A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is there an L in NOEL?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you put ''THE'' and ''IRS'' together, it''s an anagram of ''THEIRS''. Coincidence? I think not!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that when babies are born they only weigh like 7 lbs. yet the mom weighs 30 lbs. more? Why do they call the small candy bars the "fun sizes"? Wouldn''t be more fun to eat a big one? Why do people say PIN number when that truly means Personal Identification Number Number? If the handicapped bathrooms are for people who can''t walk why do they put them at the end of the bathrooms? Can someone give up lent for lent? Why do people say, "You''ve been working like a dog," when dogs just sit around all day? If marriage means you fell in love, does divorce mean you climbed out? And why isn''t the word ''gullible'' in the dictionary?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Starting from bottom to top, a short explanation of each body parts uses 1. Toe-Object used for balance(do blondes and drunks have toes? Food for thought) 2. Foot-Place in mouth after saying something stupid 3. Shin-Object used for finding furniture in the dark. 4. Pelvic area-pretty self explanatory 5. stomache- stom ACHE... coincidence? I think not. 6. Chest-What I like to talk to. 7.Fingers-Keep away from car doors. 9.Hands... 10. Elbow-I learned to dance after hitting this 11. Shoulder- Common site of burns. 12. Mouth- Place foot here(or other objects) 13. Brain- If you have one you noticed there is no eight. 14.1/2 brain-If you check for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You don''t like newbies. 2.You are #1 on this website. 3. You pretend to know everything. 4. You dislike AC3P1L07 5. You nail people for doing what you did. 6. You yell DUPE if someone you don''t know posts anything. 7. Coincidently you only report it if it really is. 8. You received a message from AC3P1L07 saying to f*** off 9. AC3P1L07 hates you. 10. Your user name is ANCHMIKE SO PISS IN SOMEONE ELSES CERIAL, I AM NOT TO BE TRIFLED WITH.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You don''t suffer from insomnia... you enjoy every minute of it. 2. Your pupils are dialated 24/7 3.*You don''t have time for a girlfriend and would rather have a talking frog instead. 4. L337 is a common word in your household. 5. The targeting reticle from halo is permanently burned onto your retina... and you love it. 6. You know the correct pronunciation of MJOLNIR. 7. You have a microwave in your room. 8. Your dog can beat your friends at halo. 9. Your pug, 30 pounds over weight can physically kick your butt. 10. You''ve memorized the entire halo soundtrack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning a husband took a pair of underwear out of the drawer. "What the...?," he said to himself as a little blue dust cloud appeared when he shook them out. "April!" he hollered into the bathroom, "Why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?" She shot back, "It''s not talcum powder. It''s ''Miracle Grow''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is not supposed to be funny. I want to make a public apology for the temper tantrum I threw earlier today. I still don''t get it but I am sorry for blaming everyone else for my problems. AC3P1L07 P.S. please vote this as funny so more people will see it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so skinny, when she wears striped PJ''s there''s only 2 stripes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a red head were swimming the breast stroke in a race. The blonde comes in last and says "Not to be a sore loser or anything, but I think the other girls were using their hands.".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bees can''t sting... The woman you like at work said yes... An Irishman walked out of a bar... I met a blonde with a brain... Kids are nice... Is there a Weed League?... Farts and flowers in the same sentence... I like Bill Gates... Lawyers have integrity... The lightbulb finally went on in Al Gore''s head... Doctors don''t fraternize with their nurses... Woman as president... Bill Clinton told the truth... Jeff Foxworthy in a suit... Priests involved with scandal admit what they did... Golf is not dull... Microsoft is better than Linux... Yo mamma is skinny, smart, and cleanly... People will like this joke... (I have included one for each category)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The girl knelt in the confessional and said, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned." "What is it, child?" "Father, I have committed the sin of vanity. Twice a day I gaze at myself in the mirror and tell myself how beautiful I am." The priest turned, took a good look at the girl and said, "My dear, I have good news. That isn''t a sin - it''s only a mistake."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man wonders if having sex on the Sabbath is a sin because he is not sure if sex is work or play. He asks a priest for his opinion on this question. The priest says after consulting the Bible, "My son, after an exhaustive search I am positive sex is work and is not permitted on Sundays." The man thinks: "What does a priest know of sex?" He goes to a minister, a married man, experienced, for the answer. He queries the minister and receives the same reply; Sex is work and not for the Sabbath! Not pleased with the reply, he seeks out the ultimate authority: a man of thousands of years tradition and knowledge - A rabbi. The rabbi ponders the question and states, "My son, sex is definitely play." The man replies," Rabbi, how can you be so sure when so many others tell me sex is work?!" The rabbi softly speaks, "If sex were work... my wife would have the maid do it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Timmy always sat in the front pew of the church and gave a hand full of change when the collection basket passed. One Sunday the pastor noticed that Timmy started to put his change in the collection basket but decided to put his money in his pocket instead. After service, Little Timmy rushed up to the pastor and wanted to hand him the handful of change, but the pastor proceeds to tell Timmy that he did not need the money and that he should put it in the basket instead. Little Timmy replies, "Oh no, father, you need it more than anyone else does, because my daddy says that you''re the poorest pastor we ever had."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the inexperienced terrorist who tried to blow up a bus? He burnt his mouth on the exhaust pipe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What is the difference between a leech and a lawyer? A:The leech stops sucking you dry after you''re dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma''s butt is so big when she sits down she''s three feet taller.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You wear a D... & A-C is tissue paper. 2. Your friends are guys, your partners are girls. 3. Anorexia is a four-letter word. 4. Pink is your favorite color... & hot pink is second. 5. Monika Lewinski is your role model. 6. You think foreign affairs is screwing two French guys. 7. M.U.D.D. means must use drugs daily. 8. ADIDAS means All Day I Dream About Sex. 9. ADIDAS applies to you. 10. It takes half of a lite beer to get you totally wasted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are all from my experiences. That''s why they''re funny. 1. You build a miniature boat out of a hostess box, water bottles, and duct tape, and float it down a river seven times. 2. You buy a headlamp, move it in circles on the wall, and say it follows wherever my head goes. 3. You make a hand with some sticks, a plastic soda bottle lid, some bugs, and a magnifying glass. 4. You pop each and every bubble on bubble wrap... in random order. 5. You line up thirteen megaphones just to see what it would do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Goldie, a middle aged Jewish woman goes to see a fortune-teller. "Two men are madly in love with me!" Goldie says. "Who will be the lucky one?" The swami answers...."Morris will marry you, and Irving will be the lucky one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You yell and scream for help, and when it comes you ask for the remote. 2. It is a workout to play high intensity video games. 3. You decide to be a republican because you bought a truck with a republican sticker on it. 4. You sell your step-brother''s stuff on e-bay for video game money. 5. You''ve hired someone to laugh at these jokes for you. 6. You shop online even though it''s more expensive because you don''t want to leave your house. 7. You died of a preventable illness because going to the doctor would take actual work. 8. You''ve hired someone to sleep with your wife because it''s to "hard". 9. You have the sofa in the back of the Guiness 2000 book. 10. You, your wife, and kids all live with your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(Linux is a server far superior to windows. It''s logo is Tux the digital penguin.) 1. Your favorite movie was Kill Bill. 2. Your favorite animal is a penguin. 3. You think micro and soft describe Bill Gates. 4. You would like to "server" Gates head. 5. Your desktop picture is of tux burning the windows flag. 6. Your motto is "W1ND0W$ 1$ 7H3 root 0F @LL 3V1L" 7. You can read the above statment. 8. You think XBOX was Microsoft''s first success. 9. You would rather have a computer from Hasbro than Microsoft. 10. Your computer can play solitaire. For you Windows users #6 means "Windows is the root of all evil".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so white and ugly Michael Jackson took one glance and thought he was looking into a mirror!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the witches favorite subject in school? SPELLing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Apricot. Apricot who? Apricot my key, open up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are cats similar to sentences? A: A cat has claws at the end of its paws; a sentence has pause at the end of its clause.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An abstract noun, the teacher said, "is something you can think of, but you can''t touch it. Can you give me an example of one?" "Sure," a teenage boy replied. "My father''s new car."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rick, fresh out of accounting school, went to an interview for a good paying job. The company boss asked various questions about him and his education, but then asked him, "What is three times seven?" "22," Rick replied. After he left, he double-checked the problem on his calculator (he KNEW he should have taken it to the interview!) and realized he wouldn''t get the job. About two weeks later, he got a letter that said he was hired for the job! He was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, but was still very curious. The next day, he went in and asked why he got the job, even though he got such a simple question wrong. The boss shrugged and said, "Well, you were the closest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man dies and finds himself standing third in line at the Pearly Gates. The Angel explains that admission requirements are now a bit more strict, as a few slum landlords and con artists have managed to slip into Heaven without being detected. He queries the first candidate: "What was your annual salary, and what was your profession?" "I made $150,000 as an Attorney" comes the reply. "You may enter" says the Angel. Second candidate, same question. "I made $95,000; I was a realtor." He is also permitted to enter. Now it is the third man''s turn. "My annual salary was $8,000." "Cool!" replies the Angel, "and what instrument did you play?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary had a little lamb, And a little pony too, She put the pony in a field, And the lamb into a stew!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('His death won''t be listed under "Obituaries," it will be under "Neighborhood Improvements."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1st woman: I took my son to the zoo yesterday. 2nd woman: Did they accept him?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Recite your tables to me, Joan. Joan: Dining table, kitchen table, bedside table...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1st man: My son was born on Saint David''s day, so I called him David. 2nd man: My son was born on Saint Patrick''s day, so I called him Patrick. 3rd man: Well, my son was born on Shrove Tuesday, so I called him Pancakes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Bush, Dan Quayle, Ross Perot, and Bill Clinton all traveled together to see the Wizard of Oz. Upon arrival, they were brought to see him. First, President Bush went to see the Wizard and said, "Everyone says I have no compassion or feelings, I wish to have a Heart," so the Wizard said, "So be it." Second was Dan Quayle. He told the Wizard, "People think I''m unintelligent and have no common sense whatsoever. I want a brain." The Wizard said, "So be it." Third to ask the Wizard was Ross Perot. "People say I have no confidence, and I lack conviction. I wish to have some courage." The Wizard granted this wish as well. Yhen Bill Clinton approached the Wizard. The Wizard looked at him and said, "Well, what do you want?" to which Clinton replied, "I''m here for Dorothy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, Bill Clinton was awakened by George Washington''s ghost in the White House. Clinton saw him and asked, "George, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" "Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did," advised George. The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson moved through the dark bedroom. "Tom, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" Clinton asked. "Cut taxes and reduce the size of government," advised Tom. Clinton didn''t sleep well the next night, and saw another figure moving in the shadows. It was Abraham Lincoln''s ghost. "Abe, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?" Clinton asked. "Go to the theatre."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Ronald Reagan are in a boat in the Potomac, when suddenly the boat develops a leak. They have only one life preserver jacket. Bill says: "Let''s do the Democratic thing. Take a vote to see who gets the life preserver." They each write a name on a piece of paper and stuff it in a coffee can. Bush and Reagan get one vote each; Clinton gets six.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that in response to President Bill Clinton''s habit of dropping in on the local McDonalds, the McDonald''s national management has announced a commemorative double cheeseburger, the McClinton? Of course, when you get it, the price has doubled, you never get the fries you were originally promised, and it''s got half the meat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before his infamous haircut on the tarmac, Clinton asked his stylist Christophe, "How long will this take, how much will it cost, and how good will this look?" Christophe replied just ten minutes, cost $20, and look marvelous. An hour and fifteen minutes later, Clinton looked into the mirror in horror and Christophe handed him a bill for $200. Clinton gasped, "You took too long, it doesn''t look that great, and it is costing me ten times more than you said!" Christophe replied, "That makes us even."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Hillary were going down a back road and stopped at a gas station. As the worker was filling up their car, he said to Hillary, "I went to high school with you". She recognized him and agreed with him. Later, as they were driving down the road, Bill said, "If you had married him you wouldn''t be married to the President." Hillary said, "Oh yes, I would - he would be President."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was Arbor Day, and a blonde, a brunette and a redhead all planted something. The redhead planted flowers in her front yard. The brunette planted a tree in her back yard. The blonde didn''t know what to plant, so she asked the redhead. "Plant something that looks good," she said. The blonde still didn''t know what to plant, so she asked the brunette. "Plant something you want more of," she said. The blonde finally knew what to plant. The next day,her husband was declared a missing person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was watching television when there was a knock on the door. He answered it, but only a snail was there. So he picked it up and threw it into the street. Two years later, the man heard another knock on the door. He opened the door and it was the snail again. The snail says, "What was that all about?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pope John Paul II gets to heaven. St. Peter says, "Frankly, you''re lucky to be here." The Pope says, "Why? What did I do wrong on earth?" St. Peter says, "God was very angry with your stance on women becoming priests." The Pope says, "He''s mad about THAT?" St. Peter says, "She''s furious."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple is at an Art exhibition, and they are looking at a portrait that has them a little taken aback. The picture depicts 3 very black, very naked men, sitting on a park bench; 2 have a black penis, and the one in the middle has a pink penis. As the couple is looking somewhat puzzled at the picture, the artist walks by and says "Can I help you with this painting. I''m the artist who painted it." The man says "Well, we like the painting but don''t understand why you have 3 African men on a bench, and the one in the middle has a pink penis, while the other two have black penises." The artist says "Oh, you are misinterpreting the painting. They''re not African men, they are Irish coal miners and the one in the middle went home for lunch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it weren''t for electricity, we''d all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so dumb, she was killed in a pie eating contest when the cow sat on her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dog went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog: "There are only nine words here. You could send another ''Woof'' for the same price." The dog replied, "But that would make no sense at all."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you have when there are 100 rabbits standing in a row and they all start hopping backwards? A: Receding hare line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Reporters asked Dan Quayle what he thought of Roe v. Wade? His response: "Two alternate ways to cross the Potomac."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the "O" and the "N" stand for in ''CLEMSON''? The "O" is for honor, and the "N" for knowledge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever hear about the Polish athlete who won a gold medal? He had it bronzed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 6 year old was in a car with her parents. She kept having sneezing fits, and she kept splattering snot all over the seats. Eventually, the Mum and Dad gave up on trying to stop the sneezing, and told the little girl to put her hands up when she sneezed. The little girl did so, raising her hands above her head, and sneezed on the Mum''s face!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Texan: "Where are you from?" Harvard graduate: "I come from a place where we do not end our sentences with prepositions." Texan: "OK, where are you from, Jackass?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two weasels are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, "I slept with your mother!" The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do. The first again yells, "I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!" The other says, "Go home dad you''re drunk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk. 9. Our love will never become cold and hollow Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow. 8. I bought this Valentine''s card at the store In hopes that, later, you''d be my whore. 7. This feels so good, it feels so right I just wish it wasn''t $250 a night. 6. You''re a woman of style, you''re a woman of class Especially when I''m spanking, your big-round-fat ass. 5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished But now I''m fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!! 4. Through all the things that came to pass Our love has grown. . . but so''s your ass. 3. You''re a honey. . . and you''re a cutie I just wished you had J-Lo''s "booty". 2. I don''t wanna be sappy or silly or corny So, right to the point, let''s do it, I''m horny! 1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister, you should check out the one that I gave to your sister!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s There? Tank. Tank Who? You''re Welcome!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the tornado say to the pecan tree? "Hold onto your nuts, this is not your average blow job!" What has four hands and eats aunts? Two uncles. What do you get when you cross an onion with a donkey? Usually an onion with long ears, but sometime you get a piece of ass that will make your eyes water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Jewish dilemma? A free ham sandwich.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? A: Eileen. Q: What do you call a boy with one foot in the door? A: Justin. Q: What do you call a girl who gambles? A: Betty. Q: What do you call a girl with one foot on either side of the river? A: Bridget. Q: What do you call a man with a spade on his head? A: Doug. Q: What do you call a girl with only one pants leg? A: Jean. Q: What do you call a man who''s a talented painter? A: Art. Q: What do you call a man with a car on his head? A: Jack. Q: What do you call a lady in the distance? A: Dot. Q: What do you call a girl with a frog on her head? A: Lily. Q: What do you call a man with numbers down his front? A: Bill. Q: What do you call a man in a pile of leaves? A: Russel. Q: What do you call a man with a rabbit on his head? A: Warren. Q: What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? A: Cliff. Q: What do you call a man who steals a lot? A: Robin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are fishing. One catches a magic fish that will grant each one a wish if they let him go. The first one wishes he could double his IQ. It is done. The second one wishes to triple his IQ. It is done. The last one (who is an idiot) wishes to multiply his IQ by a 1/2. The fish asks if he is sure; the man nods. When the fish grants his wish, he turns into a blond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Actual bumper sticker on a jeep (the writing was upside down). "If you can read this, flip me over!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has wheels and flies? Answer: Garbage truck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You don''t have to go faster than the bear, you just have to go faster than the slowest guy running from the bear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Wile Coyote had enough money for all that Acme crap, why didn''t he just buy dinner? If there''s an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule? Why do we leave expensive cars in the driveway, when we keep worthless junk in the garage? Why do they call it taking a dump? Shouldn''t it be leaving a dump? Why is it good to be a Daddy''s girl, but bad to be a Momma''s boy? Aren''t you tired of people asking you rhetorical questions and you don''t know if they are rhetorical questions or not? If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose? Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog''s face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car, he sticks his head out the window! If quitters never win, and winners never quit, who came up with, "Quit while you''re ahead"? If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What are the strongest days of the week? A. Saturday and Sunday, because all the rest are week days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so poor, I saw her walking down the street with one shoe, and I said, "Hey, you lost a shoe." And she said, "No, I found one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "Okay!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Goriest, Scariest, Yuckiest Top 12 Things You Really Don''t Want To See Written In Blood... 12) "Richard Hillman did it and------" 11) "Can you guess where your friends are?" 10) Your name signed on a Microsoft License Agreement 9) "Remember that kid you picked on during Junior Cert year..." 8) Your name on the bottom of a contract from Fianna Fail. (Irish government party) 7) "See! I can spell! Yor next" 6) "Luke, I am your father." 5) "Where the feck are the Elastoplasts?" 4) Your overdue Visa bill 3) "Does anyone have a spare Tampax?" 2) "Did yez ever wonder what happened to the blood you donated?" 1) "Dude you''re gettin'' a Dell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters: BEST IN PRAYER ASTRONOMER: When you rearrange the letters: MOON STARER DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letters: A ROPE ENDS IT THE EYES: When you rearrange the letters: THEY SEE SLOT MACHINES: When you rearrange the letters: CASH LOST IN ME ANIMOSITY: When you rearrange the letters: IS NO AMITY ELECTION RESULTS: When you rearrange the letters: LIES - LET''S RECOUNT ELEVEN PLUS TWO: When you rearrange the letters: TWELVE PLUS ONE SNOOZE ALARMS: When you rearrange the letters: ALAS! NO MORE Z ''S A DECIMAL POINT: When you rearrange the letters: IM A DOT IN PLACE AND FINALLY... MOTHER-IN-LAW: When you rearrange the letters: WOMAN HITLER', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) Umm... 2) Well... 3) Hmmm, er... 4)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('* "On the advice of our solicitors, this T-shirt bears no message at this time". * "That''s it! I''m calling me granny" (seen on a seven-year-old) * "Rehab is for quitters" * "My dog can lick anyone" * "Party - my cot - 2 a.m." (on a baby-size T-shirt) * "If a woman''s place is in the home WHY AM I ALWAYS IN THIS FECKIN'' CAR!" * "They call it ''PMT'' cos ''Mad Cow Disease'' was already taken" * "A picture is worth a thousand words - but it uses up a thousand times the memory." * "HAM AND EGGS - a day''s work for a chicken; a lifetime commitment for a pig." * "Computer programmers don''t byte, they nybble a bit." * "The trouble with life is there''s no background music." * "The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson." * "Two rights do not make a wrong. They make an airplane." * "Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Walking by, a minister saw his 5-year-old son and playmates find a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, the children had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister''s son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaather, and unto the Sonnn... and into the hole he gooooes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his love had a terrible spat: She scratched his face and he knocked her flat; She spat at him and he threw her around; She jumped from behind and he fell to the ground. How sad to see such trouble as that... Between a man and his household cat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly her reflection quit. Yo momma so old that when I slapped her back her boobs fell off. Yo momma so fat when she stepped in the deepest part of the ocean, she got her foot wet. Yo momma so old and fat, she told us about the story of how she farted and killed all the dinosaurs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When kids say: The party is supervised = It''s supervised by a grandparent who falls asleep most of the time. I''m doing well in school = Oh crap, I need help. It''s okay, I don''t need help = Get the heck away from me. When men say: Hi honey, how are you? = I''ve been cheating on you for the last 2 months, or, I cheated on you last night. When women say: I''m too tired to make dinner = Who do you think I am making dinner for you every night? Can''t a woman take a frickin'' break?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the little chick say when his mom laid an orange? A: Look at the orange-mama-lade!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('aaaaa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A neutron walks into a bar and asks, "How much for a drink?". The bartender replies, "For you, no charge".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('About four or five years ago I was standing in a ticket line at LAX, and a fellow in a line parallel to mine had a golf bag slung over his shoulder. Since the line was long and airline ticketing is a slow process at best, we struck up a conversation. He brightened when I admired his golf bag, and he proudly stated that he was on the PGA Tour. Then he turned to me and asked the question all golfers ask: "Do you play?" I shook my head, "I used to, but I quit because I wasn''t very good. I shot consistently in the low seventies." There was a long, low in-take of breath, then "The low seventies?" "Yes," I admitted. "Consistently?" he queried admiringly. "Every hole," I confessed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What''s that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you''re too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you''re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating... You finish off as an orgasm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen. "Careful ... CAREFUL!! Put in some more butter!! Oh my Gosh!! You''re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY!! Turn them!! TURN THEM NOW!! We need more butter. Oh my Gosh!! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?! They''re going to STICK!! Careful ... CAREFUL!! I said be CAREFUL!! You NEVER listen to me when you''re cooking! Never!! Turn them! HURRY UP!! Are you CRAZY? Have you lost your mind? Don''t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!!" The wife stared at him. "What the &^%$&^% is wrong with you? You think I don''t know how to fry a couple of eggs?" The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I''m driving".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. M.U.D.D.- Must use Drugs Daily 2. A.D.I.D.A.S.-All day I Dream About Sex 3. P.M.S.- Pretty Mean Stuff 4. F.B.I. Federal Beauro of Idiots 5. C.I.A.-Clueless Idiots Agency 6. N.C.I.S.-Neurologically Challenged Imbocil Society 7. P.h.D. Pretty Happy Dyke 8. U.C.L.A. Unidentified Cunt Lickers Anonymous 9. A.R.A. Agency- Anti Redundancy Agency 10. N.R.A.- Never Redundant Agency', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a father and his daughter were driving down the street when the father said, "Look! A bunny. Can you say bunny, bu-nny?" "Bunny!" the daughter replied. They suddenly felt the car go over a bump. Then the girl said, " Daddy, its not a bunny anymore." "What is it then?" he asked. The daughter replied, "Can you say roadkill, road-kill?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went to her regular plastic surgion one day. When she walked in, he said to her, "What more can I do for you? I have changed your every part of your body that you could think of! I even did your ears!" She replied, "Well, this is kind of embarrasing for me say out loud." The plastic surgion, curious to know what the blonde wanted done, asked, "What is it? You can trust me. She answered shyly. "This morning, while I was looking in the mirror, I noticed that my butt had a huge crack down the middle and i was wondering if you could get me a new one that isn''t broken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went to the eye doctor one day. She complained to the doctor that she couldn''t see and was having a hard time driving because of this. He then told her that she would need glasses. The blond knowing that the glasses would cost a couple of hundred dollars decided to save her money because she remembered she had some at home. She then told the doctor that she had a pair. He said, "OK, wear them all the time." The blonde left and went home. She called the doctor and told him she couldn''t see so he scheduled an appointment and told her to bring her glasses so he could see them. The next day the blond came in holding up two drinking glasses to her eyes and told the doctor "I had a hard time driving over here because my hands were all tied up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman was on duty when he got a complaint, so he went to go check it out. The complaint was that a sport car had not moved from a corner and was holding up traffic. When he got there, he went to the car and asked the blonde lady in it why she was holding up traffic and not going. She responded well the sign told me to stop but it doesn''t want to let me go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What'' did the bra say to the hat? You go on ahead, I''ll give these two a lift.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a male farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. Of course the farmer is a blond. :) He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing. The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks him, "Er... excuse me mister, but what are you doing?" The farmer replies, "I''m trying to win a Nobel Prize." "How?" asks the man, puzzled. "Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize to people who are out standing in their field!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid, she looked in the Cd player for her cassette tape!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young girl had just begun to go to a new Christian church group. She had been going for a couple of weeks now, and at one session their leaders were talking about when they found Jesus in their lives. One of her leaders had started saying: "When I was your age, I had just gotten Jesus in my life." She replied, "Well, how long has it been that you have had Jesus in your life?" He replied, "35 years of my life." Then she said,"God Damn, that''s a long time"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a seafood disco last week and pulled a mussel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you want to make someone laugh, use this line: Sorry. say that again. I couldn''t hear you over my fart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time there was 2 rednecks Bob and John. They were best friends. Bob had just gone bankrupt so he asked John if he could move in with him. Now John didn''t have a big house like Bob use to have but agreed to let him stay there till he got out of bankruptcy. The next day when Bob moved in, while at dinner Bob said: "John you know what?" John said:"What is it Bob?" "I thought my house was shitty. Then i came to yours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know Adam wasnt black? Have you ever tried to take a rib away from a black man? How do you know when Mexicans are illegal? When you scream "La Migra", and everybody is gone in less than a minute. How do you know when a white guy''s family is really white? When he tries to be black or mexican.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night an 87 year old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92 year old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor assisted living apartment, killing him instantly. She was brought before the court on a charge of murder. The judge asked her if she had anything to say in her defense. She began coolly, "Yes, your honor, I figured that at 92, if he could have sex... he could fly!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the coach go to the bank? To get his quarter back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Your tires cost more than your car. 2.You have a motor hanging out of your tree. 3.Your trailer house tires work but your car tires don''t. 5.You write the girl of your dreams name on the tower and then the sheriff makes you take your sisters name off of it. 6.You call your undies britches. 7.The whole town is related to you. 8.You got more trailers than cars. 9.You kill your sisters boyfriends because they''re trying to take her away from you. 10. Your haven''t had "School learning" because you don''t now how to count. (You missed that there was no number 4.) Credit to BLUE COLLAR TV', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home from work one day and he says to his wife, "Honey, I got a new secretary, and imagine what happened! She''s got a red and white bra. You know, these are the colors of my favorite football team. Anyway, it''s not a big deal but it feels good." The next day when he came home his wife asks, "How was your day?" The man say, "Fantastic! It''s not only her bra that is red and white but also her panties. You know it''s not a big deal but it really feels good!" The third day he comes home after work and now the man asks his wife, "And what happened today in your office, honey?" She says, "Oh, nothing special, sweetheart. I got a new boss today. His dick is two inches longer than yours. You know it''s not a big deal but hell, it feels good!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does Donald Trump say before he lights off a fire work? A:You`re fired!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a recent vacation in Atlantic City, a couple went to see a popular magic show. After one especially amazing feat, a woman from the back of the theater yelled out, "Hey, how''d you do that?" "I could tell you, madam," the magician answered, "But then I''d have to kill you." After a short pause, she yelled back, "Ok, then... Just tell my husband!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mamma so fat that her nickname is you gonna eat that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two redneck airplane mechanics named Jim Bob and Jeb work at the Atlanta airport. Atlanta gets fogged in one night and nothing can take off or land so Jim Bob and Jeb have nothing to do. After work Jim Bob and Jeb usally have a drink on their way home, so Jim Bob says to Jeb, "I heard that you can get a buzz off drinking jet fuel." Since they have nothing better to do, they decide to try it. The next morning Jim Bob calls Jeb and asks, "How are you feeling?" Jeb says, "Fine, never felt better." Jim Bob asks, "Do you have a hangover?" Jeb says "no." Then he says, "Wow this is great! We can drink all we want and not get a hangover." Then Jim Bob says, "Well, there is one side effect, have you farted yet?" Jeb says, "No, why?" Jim Bob says, "I''m calling you from Detroit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I thought Graceland was tacky. No kids in the back of the pick-up, it''s not safe. Do you think my hair is too big? Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace? The tires on that truck are too big. I''ve got it all on a floppy disk. Do you think this baseball cap goes with this shirt? Damned if that politician ain''t honest! We''re vegetarians. I''ll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy. You can''t feed that to the dog. Trim the fat off that steak. I just love the opera. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso. Wrasslin''s fake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were orphaned when you were a child, I feel sorry for you, but not for your parents. If you don''t want to give people a bad name, you will have your children illegitimately. Is your name Laryngitis? You''re a pain in the neck. Is your name Dan Druff? You get into people''s hair. I hear you pick your friends -- to pieces!! I bet your brain feels as good as new, seeing that you''ve never used it. They say that two heads are better than one. In your case, one would have been better than none. You should toss out more of your funny remarks; that''s all they''re good for. People can''t say that you have absolutely nothing! After all, you have inferiority! You must have a low opinion of people if you think they''re your equals. I wish you were all here. I don''t like to think there is more! If we were to kill everybody who hates you, it wouldn''t be murder; it would be genocide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you sink a canadian submarine? A: You swim underneath it and knock on the door', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can be sure someone is an idiot when he/she: Spends twenty minutes looking at an orange juice box because it said concentrate. Puts lipstick on their forhead because he wanted to makeup his mind. Gets stabbed in a shoot-out. Sends a fax with a stamp on it. Was on the corner giving out potato chips yellin'' "Free Lays!" Tries to drown a fish. If you gave them a penny for their intelligence, you''d get change. Thinks socialism means partying. Trips over a cordless phone. Takes a rule to bed to see how long they slept. At the bottom of the application where it says "Sign Here" he put Sagittarius." Takes 2 hours to watch 60 minutes. Studies for a blood test and fails. Invents a solar powered flashlight. Sells the car for gas money. Heard 90% of all crimes occur around the home, he moves. Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 bus twice instead. Takes you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport left", he turned around and went home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I sent flowers to someone who was moving to Florida for a job promotion. I also sent flowers the same day to a funeral for a friend. I found out later that the flower shop got the cards mixed up. They sent the card to the guy who was moving that said, "Deepest Condolences," and sent the card to the funeral home that said, "I know it''s hot where you''re going, but you deserve it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother complained to a doctor about her daughter''s strange eating habits. "All day long she lies in bed and eats yeast and car wax. What will happen to her?" "Don''t worry," said the doctor. "Eventually, she''ll rise and shine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she tripped on 4th Ave. and she landed on 12th!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One dog said to her pups, "Don''t ever bite the hand that feeds you. Any other hand is ok, though."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy walked up to a man and asked, "Hey mister, wanna donate to the WE NEED HELP children''s fund?" the man said, "No, but I will donate a pack of listerine bottles because I hope all of the kids'' breath don''t smell as bad as yours!" (real life situation)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl is helping her mommy with the dishes when she notices that some of her hairs are gray. She asks her mom, "Why are some of your hairs gray?" The mom replies cleverly, "Whenever you make me cry or lie to me, one of my hairs turn gray." The girl thinks for a minute, and then asks, "Is that why all Grandma''s hairs are gray?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where is Spiderman''s home page? A: On the world wide web. Q: Why is Superman stupid? A: Because he wears his underwear over his pants. Q: Why is Batman more stupid? A: Because he wears his underwear over his pants and puts on a belt over his underwear. Q: Why is Robin even more stupid? A: Because he followed what batman did. Q: Why is Wonder Woman stupid? A: Because she wears a belt on her head. Q: Why is Spiderman the most stupid superhero of them all? A: Because he wears his underwear over his head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a lawyer''s office and inquired about the lawyer''s rates. "Fifty dollars for three questions," replied the lawyer. "Isn''t that awfully steep?" asked the man. "Yes," the lawyer replied, "and what is your third question?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re ghetto when you carry food stamps in a money clip!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three men at a bar. One man got drunk and started a fight with the other two men. The police came and took the drunk guy to jail. The next day the man went before the judge. The judge asked the man, "Where do you work?" The man said, "Here and there." The judge asked the man, "What do you do for a living?" The man said, "This and that." The judge then said, "Take him away." The man said, "Wait, judge when will I get out?" The judge said to the man, "Sooner or later."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men can''t pack a bag. Men wouldn''t be caught dead wearing red velvet. Men would feel their masculinity is threatened... having to be seen with all those elves. Men don''t answer their mail. Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described, even in jest, as anything remotely resembling a "bowlful of jelly." Men aren''t interested in stockings unless somebody''s wearing them. Having to do the "Ho, Ho, Ho," thing would seriously inhibit their ability to pick up women. Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun had to use the bathroom, so she went into a bar, the first place she could find. She noticed that every time the lights went out, everybody cheered. She went up to the bartender and asked him why. He said she would be better off not knowing, so she asked where the bathroom is. He gave her directions. When she got there she saw a big naked statue with a fig leaf covering you-know-where. When she exited the bathroom everybody cheered. She asked the bartender why, and he replied,"Every time someone lifts the fig leaf, the lights go out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of shoes do you wear to the beach? SANDals!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? A little old lady. A little old lady who? I didn''t know you could yodel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Unitarian Universalist walks into a fabric store and asks the clerk for nine yards of material. The clerk asks, "What are you going to make?" The UU says, "I''m making a nightgown for myself as a present for my husband." The clerk says, "But nine yards is way too much material for a nightgown." The UU says, "I know, but my husband would rather seek than find."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dogs have masters, cats have staff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you leave a message on this thing? I can''t understand the instructions. Hello. Testing 1 2 3. I wonder what happens if I touch this... YOW! You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, "We aren''t in, leave a message." That''s why I''ve decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me... Drawling granny voice: Way back inna winner of fifty-two, we didn'' have fanshy gadjets like no ansherin'' machine. You jusht had to call and call until shummbody got home. Now, shum people, dey shay dey don'' like ''em, but I shay it''ll shave you a lotta trouble if you jusht leave a meshage. Thanksh a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A red-faced judge convened court after a long lunch. The first case involved a man charged with drunk driving who claimed it simply wasn''t true. "I''m as sober as you are, your honor," the man claimed. The judge replied, "Clerk, please enter a guilty plea. The defendant is sentenced to 30 days in jail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The National Institutes of Health have announced that they will no longer be using rats for medical experimentation. In their place, they will use attorneys. They have given three reasons for this decision: 1. There are now more attorneys than there are rats. 2. The medical researchers don''t become as emotionally attached to the attorneys as they did to the rats. 3. No matter how hard you try, there are some things that rats won''t do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two college students, Frank and Matt, are riding on a New York City subway when a beggar approaches them asking for spare change. Frank adamantly rejects the man in disgust. Matt, on the other hand, whips out his wallet, pulls out a couple of singles and gladly hands them over to the beggar with a smile. The beggar thanks him kindly and then continues on to the other passengers. Frank is outraged by his friend''s act of generosity. "What on earth did you do that for?" shouts Frank., "You know he''s only going to use it on drugs or booze." Matt replies, "And we weren''t?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. Who''s There? Yule. Yule who? Yule never know until you open the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are hairdressers always on time? A: Because they know all the short cuts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top Ten Things Men Understand About Women... 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wait a second!!! I am NOT a loser! I have tried. I am a failure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid that she forgot where she parked her car in an empty parking lot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the male rabbit buy the female rabbit for her birthday? 14 carrot gold!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the glass fool anybody? Because everybody could see right through him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you tell when a bucket gets sick? A: It becomes a little pale.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks into a restaraunt and asks for fish and chips. When she sees the fries on her plate she says "I asked for chips, not fries!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond is in math class. The teacher says, "We are going to be learning about pi (3.14) today. Does anyone know what that is?" The blond says "I do. I made a cherry one this morning."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Candy Candy who? Candy have some sweets? Please!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gent spots a nice looking girl in a bar goes up and starts small talk. Seeing that she didn''t back off, he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. "That''s a nice name," he said warming up the conversation. "Who named you, your mother?" "No, I named myself," she answered. "Oh, that''s interesting. Why Carmen?" "Because I like cars, and I like men," she said. "So, what''s your name?" she asked. "Beerf$%^."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Snowflake. Snowflake who? There''s snowflake like home!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Courtney: Let''s see who can stay up the longest tonight. Kaitlyn: I know! We''ll pinch each other every ten minutes to make sure we don''t fall asleep! Starting right NOW! Courtney: Hey, I''m not even tired! Kaitlyn: See, my plan is working!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dinosaur that is able to give you a synonym for any word you give him? Answer: A Thesaurus! :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. The Yankees General Manager''s name is Brian Cashman. 2. Barry Bonds'' initals are BB, the abreviation for a walk is also BB.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What key opens no lock? A Monkey!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What key opens no lock? A Turkey!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Hodja (teacher) was selling olives at the market and business was slow. He called to a woman who was passing by and tried to entice her. She shook her head and told him she didn''t have any money with her."No problem," the Hodja grinned. "You can pay me later." She still looked hesitant, so he offered her one to taste. "Oh no, I can''t, I''m fasting," she responded. "Fasting? But Ramadan was 6 months ago!" "Yes, well, I missed a day and I''m making it up now. Go ahead and give me a kilo of the black olives." "Forget it!" shouted the Hodja. "If it took you 6 months to pay back a debt you owed ALLAH, who knows when you''ll get around to paying me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a big moron and a little moron, sitting on a ledge. The big moron fell off. Why? Because the little moron was a little more on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t let your mind wander. It''s too small to be out on its own.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cathy was looking through the window of a clothes store when she spotted a pair of short-shorts. "Wow, these pants are half off!" she told her uncle. Her uncle said "They should be, they are only a half pair of pants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an ice-cream? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - A motorcycle, it has no wheels. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Hehe, you should have seen your face!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Divorced Jewish man seeks partner to attend shul with, light Shabbos candles, celebrate holidays, build Sukkah together, attend brisses and Bar Mitzvahs. Religion not important. ***** Israeli professor, 41, with 18 years of teaching in my behind. Looking for American-born woman who speaks English very good.I am a sensitive Jewish prince to whom you can open your heart to share your innermost thoughts and deepest secrets. Confide in me. I''ll understand your insecurities. No fatties, please. ***** Jewish male, 34. Very successful, smart, independent, self-made. Looking for girl whose father will hire me. ***** Single Jewish woman, 29, into disco, mountain climbing, skiing, track and field. Has slight limp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church board after the service. The first man to arrive was a stranger. "You misunderstood my announcement. This is a meeting of the board," said the minister. "I know," said the man. "If there is anyone here more bored than I am, I''d like to meet him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were the teacher''s eyes crossed? She couldn''t control her pupils!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lisa was playing bowling with her friend Marie. Lisa got a strike, then one more strike. Then, she got another strike. She had just gotten 3 strikes in a row! "I just got 3 strikes in a row!" said Lisa. Marie said, "You''re out, you just got 3 strikes in a row!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gazelle goes out for her usual afternoon walk. About an hour later, she realizes that she is lost out in the open. Unskilled in the ways of the real world, she asks a cheetah, "Excuse me sir, do you know what time it is?" With a grin, the cheetah said, "It''s lunchtime."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the answer to this riddle? What is greater than God, More evil than the devil, The poor have it, The rich need it, And if you eat it, you''ll die? A: Nothing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do the Star Trek Enterprise and toilet paper have in common? A: They both circle around Uranus searching for Klingons!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been debating buying a vehicle for weeks. He wanted a truck. She wanted a fast little sports car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range. "Look!" she said, "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in just a few seconds. Nothing else will do. My birthday is coming up. so surprise me!" He did just that, so for her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale. Nobody has seen or heard from him since.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In my holiday to one Asian country, I happened to make a friendship with a local guy while I was drinking a softdrink Fanta. He speaks broken English, but I can fairly understand him. I offered him a softdrink, to that he choose Coco Cola. The guy was showing some postcard of Mountains to me. They are really beautiful and just remarked "Fantastic!". I also showed him some beautiful pictures of country side stored in my digital camera, where I have trekked. To my surprise! Can you guess what was his remark? ... ... ... ... ... ... He remarked "Coco Colastic!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make one disappear? Add the letter g, to make it GONE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the man put his money in the freezer? He wanted cold hard cash!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the porcupine say to the cactus? "Is that you, mommy?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb, she tried to fix breaking news!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a cat''s favorite part of the computer? The mouse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a ghost''s least favorite room in a house? -The living room', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Olive Olive who? Olive you!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the kid walk backwards to school? Because it was back to school day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do spell mousetrap with only three letters? C-A-T', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was this Australian guy, an English guy, and an American guy. They all went into a furniture store to by a chair that played music when you sat on it (aka musical chair). The next day the Australian guy comes back and says he wants to return the chair. When the clerk asks why he says it''s too hard, so the clerk gives him his money back. The day after that the English guy comes back and says he wants to return the chair and again when the clerk asks why, he says it was too hard. So the clerk gives him his money back. The next day the American guy comes back and asks to return the chair. The clerk, getting somewhat annoyed by this time, says, "Let me guess, it''s too hard right?" The American guy says, "No, the chair plays the National Anthem so whenever I sit down I have to stand up again, but then the music stops so I sit down and stand up! Up, down, up, down and so on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One eye says to the other eye, "Between you and me, something smells."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does a judge eat lunch? At the food court!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did 3 blonds jump off the building? To see if their maxi-pads had wings!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Kentucky horse breeder had a filly that won every race in which she was entered. But as she got older she became very temperamental. He soon found that when he raced her in the evening, she would win handily, but when she raced during the day she would come in dead last. He consulted the top veterinarians and horse psychologists to no avail. He finally had to give up because it had become a real night mare.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her classes: "A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars. One-fifth is to go to his wife, one-fifth is to go to his son, one-sixth to his butler, and the rest to charity. Now, what does each get?" After a very long silence in the classroom, Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher called on Little Johnny for his answer. With complete sincerity in his voice, Little Johnny answered, "A lawyer!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that heaven and hell are actually right next to each other? They are seperated by a big chain-link fence. Well, one day hell was having a big party and it got a little out of hand. God heard the ruckus and arrived to find his fence completely smashed by the wild partiers. He called the devil over and said "Look, Satan, you have to rebuild this fence." Satan agreed. The next day God noticed that the devil had completely rebuilt the fence...but it was 2 feet further into heaven than before. "Satan!" beckoned God. "You have to take that fence down and put it back where it belongs!" "Yeah? What if I don''t?" replied the devil. "I''ll sue you if I have to," answered God. "Sure," laughed Satan. "Where are you going to find a lawyer?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Employer: "In this job we need someone who is responsible." Applicant: "I''m the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three youngsters are having hot discussion, about whose father is the tallest one. The first one said, "My father is just like statue of Liberty. Your hat will fall off if you look at him" The second one does not want to loose the discussion. He added, "That''s nothing! You can not see my father''s hands, when he stands up and waves. They vanish in the clouds". The third one, a born winner in the discussion, confidently added, "Did your father''s hands feel something, when he was waving in the clouds?" The second one replied confidently that he is going to win the discussion, "Why, certainly, he once told me his hands felt something up in the clouds and he tried to pull that." The third one said, "That something was my father''s under pant. He once complained that they are being pulled by someone while standing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JUST because I have a short attention span doesn''t mean I', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I die I want to go peacefully - like my grandfather did - in his sleep. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there no phone books in China? Because there are so many Wing''s and Wong''s, they are afraid you will Wing the Wong number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the new muslim air mattress? It blows itself up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t you have a terribly empty feeling - in your skull?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken go across the field? Because the referee shouted "FOWL"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are walking down the street when a mugger approaches them and demands their money. They both grudgingly pull out their wallets and begin taking out their cash. Just then one guy turns to the other and hands him a bill. "Here''s that $20 I owe you," he says.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a passenger flight, the pilot comes over the public address system as usual and to greet the passengers. He tells them at what altitude they''ll be flying, the expected arrival time, and a bit about the weather, and advises them to relax and have a good flight.. Then, forgetting to turn off the microphone, he says to his co-pilot, "What would relax me right now is a cup of coffee and a blowjob." All the passengers hear it. As a stewardess immediately begins to run toward the cockpit to tell the pilot of his slip-up, one of the passengers stops her and says "Don''t forget the coffee!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo, and I''m thinking, okay, here''s a gal who''s capable of making a decision she''ll regret in the future.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While out one morning in the park, a jogger found a brand new tennis ball, and seeing none around it might belong to, he slipped it into the pocket of his shorts. Later, on his way home, he stopped at the pedestrian crossing, waiting for the lights to change. A girl standing next to him eyed the large bulge in his shorts. "What''s that ?" she asked, her eyes gleaming with lust. "Tennis ball," came the breathless reply. "Oh," said the girl sympathetically, "that must be painful.... I had tennis elbow once."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Blow out a huge depressed fart and blame it on the person next to you out loud. 2. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator. 3. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 4. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. 5. Meow occasionally. 6. Show other passengers a rash on your genitals and ask if it looks infected. 7. Leave a box between the doors. 8. Sell Girl Scout cookies. 9. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask ''is that your beeper?'' 10. Say ''I wonder what all these do'' and push the red buttons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. The Magical World Inside The Abandoned Refrigerator 2. Where to Find the Toys in the Oven 3. 101 Games to Play in the Road 4. Homemade Fireworks using a Bathtub, a Blowdryer, and a Fork 5. Your Nightmares are Real 6. Monsters Killed Grandpa 7. All Guns Squirt Water 8. How Fun it is to Tie a Squirrel to a Kite 9. If it''s Storming out, the Best Place to Take Shelter is under a Tree 10. Dad''s New Wife Robert', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges? What happens if you get scared halfway to death twice? If the #2 pencil is so popular, why is it still #2? If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? If you write a book about failure, and it doesn''t sell, is it a success? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry? If Superman is so smart, why does he wear underpants over his trousers? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Why is it that if someone tells you there are 1 billion stars in the universe, you will believe them, but if someone tells you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was early morning at the military base, and the first sergeant was calling out names for the daily work parties listed on a piece of paper: "Ames" "Here!" "Jenson" "Here!" "Jones" "Here!" "Magersky" "Here!" "Seeback" No answer. "Seeback!" No answer was heard again. "SEEBACK!!!" The troops remained totally silent. At that point, someone whispered into the first sergeant''s ear. He looked again at what the last name really said, quickly turned over the list and continued calling the names printed on the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fellow in a bar noticed a woman, always alone, come in on a fairly regular basis. After the second week, he made his move. "No, thank you." she said politely. "This may sound rather odd in this day and age, but I''m keeping myself pure until I meet the man I love." "That must be rather difficult," the man replied. "Oh, I don''t mind too much," she said, "but it has my husband pretty upset."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl named Melissa was having a birthday party with her friends. One of her friends gives her this most annoying, screaming and loud singing bird as a funny gift. Melissa''s dad says "We are not keeping that bird, you know that, right?" Melissa says, "Please, it''s so cute. I''ll put it in my room." The dad says that he will think about it. That night, Melissa asks her dad if it is OK to keep the singing bird. Her dad says "I''m still not sure. I''ll have to sleep on it." Melissa says "No. Don''t break it. Besides, won''t it be more comfy if you slept in your bed?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: "Miss, may I kiss you?" Girl: "No." Boy: "Could you let me embrace your waist with my arms?" Girl: "No." Boy: "Well, then, may I touch your hands?" Girl: "No." Boy: "Why do you keep saying ''No'' all the time?" Girl: "Mom said, when date with a boyfriend for the first time, remember to say No to everything." Boy: "Oh, really? Your mom is so..., OK. Miss, do you mind I touch your hands?" Girl: "No." Boy: "Miss, do you mind if I embrace your waist with my arms? " Girl: "No." Boy: "Miss, do you mind I kiss you?" Girl: "Er... No."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little 6 year old Nancy and her big sister, Sandy were at the mall, looking at a sweatshirt. "That shirt is 60 dollars," said Sandy. "I wish I could afford it." Then the shopkeeper comes up, and says, "Can I help you girls with something?" "Well, this sweater is 60 dollars and we only have 43 dollars," said Nancy. "Well, sorry, but you are a little short," said the shopkeeper. "I can''t help it, I''m only 6," Nancy replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she has to use the highway as a slip and slide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did they ban the wave at the local football games? *Too many blondes were drowning. Why was the blonde on the roof of the bar? *Someone told her that the drinks were on the house. Why don''t blondes eat M&Ms? *They are too hard to peel. Why do blondes take the pill? *It''s the only way that they can keep track of what day of the week it is. Did you hear about the blonde that robbed a bank? *She tied up the safe and blew the guard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a shower, the man grabbed his shirt that his wife hung on the back of the door. It fell into the trash can. After picking it up, he looked into the trash and saw nothing so he put the shirt on. He went to college and walking along the corridor, he heard stiff laughs from everyone. After stopping in an open area, he looked around and saw nothing funny. When he started walking again, when PLOP, something behind him dropped to the floor. It was his wife''s bloody pad! Apparently it had been in the trashcan when the shirt fell in and stuck to the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What crackers do firemen like in their soup? Firecrackers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cecil and Scott are two homosexuals living together. It was extremely hot one day and Cecil arrived home to find Scott with his ass in the freezer. "Scott! What are you doing with your ass in the freezer?" Scott replied, "It was so hot outside, I thought you''d like something cool to slip into!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so short, she had 2 cuff her panties.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, she jumped on the arch and made it into the MacDonald''s M.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama''s so fat, she waz about 2 jump in the ocean, and the ocean jumped out and said u 1st.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you go into the bathroom you''re Russian; when you are in the bathroom, European; when you come out of the bathroom, you''re Finnish. You have to read the nationalities slowly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a duck and a spider? A duck has a web in its feet, a spider has its feet in a web!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a praying mantis with a termite? A bug that says grace before eating your house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday school teacher of pre-schoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that he grew up, etc. So he asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?" Steven raised his hand and said, "He''s in heaven!" Mary was called on and answered, "He''s in my heart!" Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know! I know! He''s in our bathroom!" The whole class went very quiet, looked at the teacher, and waited for a response. The teacher was completely at a loss for a few seconds. He finally gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how he knew this. Little Johnny replied, "Well, every morning my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells: ''Jesus Christ, are you still in there?''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny and his mother were having a parent-teacher conference. MOTHER: Johnny really enjoys having you as a teacher, Mrs. Bengal. JOHNNY: Really? I didn''t know it was opposite day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. If you had a $25 bill, what would you do with it? 2. How many tomatoes grow on a tree? 3. How many animals did Moses take on the ark?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in front of a door? Matt What do you call a guy with no arms or legs swimming? Bob What do you call a guy with no arms or legs water skiing? Skip', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(These are fake books, but they make me laugh) "Spots on the Wall" by Hoo-flung-poo "Under the Bleachers" by Seamore Butts "Ten Steps from the Outhouse" by Willie Makeit, Illustrations by Bettie Cant', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are all the numbers scared of 7? Because 7 ate 9!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Whos there? Deaf person. Deaf person who? Sorry, can''t hear you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher in New York City wanted to see how many animals the city kids in her fourth-grade class could identify. She drew a picture of a cow on the blackboard and said, "Who can tell me what this is?" A little girl raised her hand. "Yes, Janie, what do you think it is?" "It''s a cow, teacher." "Very good, Janie," said the teacher. Then she drew a picture of a pig, and a little boy answered correctly. She drew several other barnyard animals and was unable to stump the class. Finally, she decided to try something a little more difficult. She drew a stag with a large spread of antlers. The kids just stared, but nobody offered an answer. "I''ll give you a hint," said the teacher. "What does your mommy call your daddy when she''s trying to be ''lovey-dovey''?" Instantly, little Johnny raised his hand and said, "I know, teacher. It''s a big horny bastard!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman is in bed with her lover who happens to be her husband''s best friend. They make love for hours, and afterwards, while they''re just laying there, the phone rings. Since it is the woman''s house, she picks up the receiver. Her lover looks at her and listens, only hearing her side of the conversation ... (She is speaking in a cheery voice) "Hello? Oh, hi. I''m so glad that you called. Really? That''s wonderful. I am so happy for you. That sounds terrific. Great! Thanks. Okay. Bye." She hangs up the telephone, and her lover asks, "Who was that?" "Oh," she replies," that was my husband telling me all about the wonderful time he''s having with you on his fishing trip."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so dumb when she went through the McDonalds drive through, she drove through McDonalds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde laughs at a joke 3 times. When the joke is told, When the joke is explained, And 5 days later, when she gets it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know this might be a little on the stupid side but I think it''s funny... Happy Birthday to you.. You live in a zoo.. You smell like a monkey.. And you look like one too..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends, a blonde and a redhead, are walking down the street and pass a flower shop where the redhead saw her boyfriend buying flowers. Redhead sighed and said, "Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again." The blonde looked quizzically at her and said, "You don''t like getting flowers from your boyfriend?" The redhead said, "I love getting flowers, but he always has expectations after giving me flowers, and I just don''t feel like spending the next three days on my back with my legs in the air." The blonde says, "Don''t you have a vase?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s this drunk standing out on the street corner, and a cop passes by, and says, "What do you think you''re doing?" The drunk says, "I heard the world goes around every 24 hours, and I''m waiting on my house. Won''t be long now, there goes my neighbor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Have you heard about the new ''Mint flavored birth control pill for women that they take immediately before sex? A. They''re called Predicaments', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If someone says, "A penny for your thoughts,", and you give them your two cents worth, what happens to the other penny?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred had just came back from a hiking trip, when his friend, George, asked how it was. "It was great!" said Fred, except on my way home I accidentally awoke a lion....it started chasing me....at one time he was so close, that I could feel his breath on my neck, but then he slipped!! He caught up again, and I could smell his foul breath right behind me, but he slipped again! Then he was so close, his paw reached out, inches away from my shoulders. Yet he slipped, for the third time! That is when I spotted a car and got a ride back here!" "Wow!", says George, "If that happened to me I would Have wet my pants!!" Fred looks at him and says "What do you think the lion kept slipping on?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s breath is so stank the thermometer read, "I Quit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, she wears a microwave as a beeper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. what is more diffucult than getting a pregnant elephant in your car? A. getting an elephant pregnant in your car', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why are families like chocolate? A. They are mostly sweet, with a few nuts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad: Courtney, do you want penne pasta for dinner? Courtney: No, but I''ll have dime or quarter pasta.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma so fat, when she sat down, she sat next to Everyone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s So Fat... When she crosses the border, they think she''s tryin to smuggle the whole country. When she was at the zoo the elephants were scared she might step on them. She''s what caused Mexico City to sink into the ground. She sunk Atlantis. She once found a whale hidden in her belly button. When a plane has to make an emergancy landing they use her as a runway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock ! Who''s there ? Bless ! Bless who ? I didn''t sneeze !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there ! Banana ! Banana who ? Banana split, so ice creamed !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) The couch is not mine. 2) No matter how much larger the human is, the cat still deserves half of the bed. 3) Tell those you love how much you love them but only after they feed you. 4) Its okay to be a tad overweight as long as you are still able to reach your goals(for example the windowsill). 5) Catnip actualy has a rather nice scent. 6) The printer is a valid seat. 7) All scurmishes with others can be solved by looking innocent. 8) Its okay to lose some hair, and of course, 9) Its always nice to be with those you love,even if they do smell like dog!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mommas like a really popular website;over 10,000 hits a day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, brunette, and a redhead all get together once a week to talk about the problems they are having with their daughters, and get input from the other two moms. So, the brunette decided to open the meeting. "I found a pack of cigarettes on my daughter''s nightstand the other night. What am I going to do?" The moms told her to talk to her daughter and tell her it was wrong, and to never do it again. The redhead said that she had recently found a 12 pack of beer in her daughter''s closet. The moms told her to talk to her daughter, tell her it was wrong, and never to do it again. When it was the blonde mom''s turn she said: "I found a box of condoms on my daughter''s dresser the other day." All the moms are in shock. But the blonde gets up and says, "No no, the worst part is that I didn''t even know she had one of those."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Think of the beat of the song walking in a winter wonderland while you are reading this... Lacy things -- the wife is missin'', Didn''t ask -- her permission, I''m wearin'' her clothes, Her silk pantyhose, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear. In the store -- there''s a teddy, Little straps -- like spaghetti, It holds me so tight, Like handcuffs at night, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear. In the office there''s a guy named Melvin, He pretends that I am Murphy Brown. He''ll say, "Are you ready?" I''ll say,"Whoa, Man!" "Let''s wait until our wives are out of town!" Later on, if you wanna, We can dress -- like Madonna, Put on some eyeshade, And join the parade, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear! Lacy things... missin'', Didn''t ask... permission, Wearin'' her clothes, Her silk pantyhose, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear. Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear, Walkin'' ''round in women''s underwear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunken guy is walking down the street. He sees this nun, runs up and knocks her over. He says, "You don''t feel so tough now, do you,Batman!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has 40 teeth and holds back a monster? My zipper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many academics does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None. That is what their students are for.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men at a bar had been enjoying a few drinks for the past couple of hours and were pretty drunk when one of them notices a beautiful woman sitting in the corner. One says to the other, "Geez, I''d really like to dance with that girl." The other man replies, "Well go ahead and ask her, don''t be a chicken s***." So the man approaches the lovely woman and says, "Excuse me, would you be so kind as to dance with me?" Seeing the man is totally drunk the woman says, "I''m sorry, right now I''m contemplating on matrimony, and I''d rather sit than dance." So the man humbly returns to his friend. "So what did she say?" asks the friend. The drunk responded, "She said she''s constipated on macaroni, and would rather s*** in her pants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks out of a bar and sees a bum panhandling on the corner. The bum says, "Mister, can you spare a dollar?" The man thinks about the question for a bit and asks the bum, "If I give you a dollar, are you going to use it to buy liquor?" "No", says the bum. The man then asks the bum, "If I give you a dollar are you going to use it to gamble?" "No", says the bum. So the man says to the bum, "Do you mind coming home with me so I can show my wife what happens to someone who doesn''t drink or gamble?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do me and a mirror have in common? A. When we see your face we both crack up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the rooster cross the road? A: He heard the chicken was a slut. Q: Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? A: They already have boyfriends. Q: Why is it that an archaeologist is the best man to have as a husband? A: The older you get the more he is interested in you. Q: What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A: A widow! Q: Why are blond jokes so short? A: So men can remember them. Man: I don''t know why you wear a bra. You''ve got nothing to put in it. Woman: You wear a pants, don''t you? Man: God, why did you make my girlfriend so beautiful and caring?" God: So you would love her. Man: But God, why did you make her so stupid?" God: So she would love you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so dumb you stole free samples.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a lawyer and a wood tick? A wood tick falls off when you die.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Haven''t I seen you on TV? Well yes I do appear off and on, how do you like me? Off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, she can sell shade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama is so fat, a giant mistook her for a bowling ball!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One bright day in the middle of the night, 2 dead boys got up to fight back to back they faced each other, drew their knives, and shot each other. a deaf policeman heard the noise, and came to kill those two dead boys. if you don''t believe my stories true, ask the blind guy, he saw it to!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: "Do you think I''ll lose my looks when I get older?" Friend: "With luck, yes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people? A. All my autopsies have been performed on dead people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince. Yo mamma so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper. Yo mamma so old she ran track with dinosaurs. Yo mamma so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals. Yo mamma so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A job seeker was interviewing, and the interviewer asked him, "Tell me what is your greatest strength?" The prospective employee said, "Sir, I am a little bit shy, but should I give you my honest answer?" The interviewer says, "Of course, yes. I expect nothing but honesty from my staff." The job seeker says, "Sir, my greatest strength is my wife." The interviewer was quite impressed with the spousal respect of this man, thought he could be a great member of his team, corporate community and he deserved the job. So with an intention of offering him the job soon the interviewer tried to wrap up with the last question, "Tell me now, what is your greatest weakness?" The guy felt encouraged, and went on, "Sir, my greatest weakness is someone else''s wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There have been recent terrorist activities in France. Today the had to upgrade their security system from "Run" to "Hide". If things get any worse they''ll have to go to "Surrender", and then "Beg for Mercy".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she uses a dump truck as a toilet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mom is like a shotgun, one cock and shes ready to blow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you spot a happy motorcyclist? By the bugs in his teeth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My karma ran over your dogma. Cover me. I''m changing lanes. I''m in no hurry, I''m on my way to work. Hey idiot, hang up! You are driving a car, not a phone booth. Take your time, but hurry. Speed kills, drive slow, get a Honda. 0 to 60... in 15 minutes. If you don''t like my driving, stay off the footpath. Why am I the only person on earth that knows how to drive? Forget about world peace... visualize using your turn signal. As a matter of fact, I DO own the road. Evacuate the road!!! STUDENT driving!! Go on speeding, we''ll cut you out (of your car ) -- Your Fire Dept. Caution: Driver Sleeping. Don''t Think and Drive. Caution I swerve and hit people at random. So many pedestrians, so little time. Faster than a speeding ticket. Caution: I drive like you do The driver has no money, he''s married. Stop reading my bumper stickers and pay attention to the road! :D', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A schoolteacher wanted to show her students how dangerous drinking alcohol could be. She brought a jar of alcohol and an earthworm to class one day to demonstrate its effects. She dropped the worm into the alcohol and it died instantly. She then asked her students what this proved. One student raised his hand and said, "If you drink a lot of alcohol, you won''t get worms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the Irish Potato famine, a young Irish-Catholic woman was worried about the poverty of her family. She told her parents that she was going to America to seek her fortune. With many tears, they let her go. Years passed, and the woman returned home. She arrived in a private jet, dressed in a gorgeous designer gown, with dazzling, expensive jewelry. Her family was stunned by their daughter''s wealth, and a more than a little curious at how she had come by it. The daughter finally confessed. "I hate to tell you this, but the reason I became so rich was because I became a prostitute." Her father immediately collapsed in shock. The doctor was called, and he began to help the man. As the daughter wept at her father''s bedside, she sobbed, "I didn''t realize he would be so disappointed to hear I became a prostitute!" The father sat bolt upright. "Prostitute?!" he exclaimed. "I thought you said ''Protestant''!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honk if you hate noise pollution!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb she got hit by a parked car!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your ex-lover wants you back and you want him to know your serious, here''s something you could say: "Come on back and take yo space, ''cuz if you break my heart again, I''ll break yo face".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the end of a T.V. show, why do they say "filmed in front of a live audience?" Well, it wouldn''t be a dead audience, would it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Chickens have no breast? Cause the Rooster has no hands!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Storming into his lawyer''s office, a Texas oil magnate demanded that divorce proceedings begin at once against his young bride. "What''s the problem?" "I want to hit that adulterin'' bitch for breach of contract," snapped the oil man. "I don''t know if that will fly," said the lawyer. "I mean your wife isn''t a piece of property; you don''t own her!" "Damn right," the tycoon rejoined, "but I sure as hell expect exclusive drillin'' rights!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The kindergarten teacher is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely" to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. When called upon the first student says, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher said, "Well, that isn''t entirely correct, because sometimes it''s gray and cloudy." Another student says, "Grass is definitely green." Teacher again replies, "If grass doesn''t get enough water it turns brown, so that isn''t really correct." Another student raises his hand and asks the teacher, "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher replied, "No, and that is not a suitable question for class discussion." The student replies, "Then I definitely pooped in my pants."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid called up his mom from his college and asked her for some money, because he ran out of it. Mom said, ''Sure, sweetie. I''ll send you some money. You also left your calculus book here when you visited 2 weeks ago. Do you want me to send that up too?'' ''Uh, oh yeah, OK,'' responded the kid. So Mom wrapped the book along with the checks up in a package, kissed Dad goodbye, and went to the post office to mail the money and the book. When she gets back, Dad asked, ''Well how much did you give the boy this time? Mom said, ''Oh, I wrote 2 checks, one for $20, and the other for $1000'' ''That''s $1020!!!'' yelled Dad, ''Are you crazy???'' ''Don''t worry hon,'' Mom said, as she kissed Dad on the on top of his bald head, ''I taped the $20 check to the cover of his book, but I put the $1000 one somewhere between the pages in Chapter 19!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The young blonde bride made her first appointment with a gynecologist and told him that she and her husband wished to start a family. "We''ve been trying for months now, doctor, and I don''t seem to be able to get pregnant," she confessed miserably. "I''m sure well solve your problem," the doctor reassured her. "If you''ll just take off your clothes and get up on the examining table." "Well, all right, doctor," agreed the young woman, blushing, "but I''d rather have my husband''s baby."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blond and a redhead were talking on the phone. Blonde:My doctor told me I have to lose about ten pounds. Redhead:Oh really? Do you know what you going to do? Blonde: No not at all... hey you lost wieght recently. How did you do it? Redhead: I used the special K diet blonde:Whats that? Redhead:Well you eat a bowl of special K for lunch and one for breakfast and have a sensable dinner each day. I lost 5 pounds in a week Blonde: Okay thanks! a week later the blonde calls back her friend Redhead: How did it work? blonde:Not well at all i gained 5 pounds redhead: Really did you follow my intructions exactly? blonde: Well no but i had to lose double the wieght Redhead: Well what did you do? blonde: Well i figured that if 1 bowl for both breakfast and lunch was good for 5 pounds then two bowls for both breakfast and lunch would be good for ten.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A jealous husband hired a private detective to check on the movements of his wife. The husband wanted more than a written report; he wanted video of his wife''s activities. A week later, the detective returned with a video. They sat down together to watch it. Although the quality was less than professional, the man saw his wife meeting another man! He saw the two of them laughing in the park. He saw them enjoying themselves at an outdoor cafe. He saw them dancing in a dimly lit nightclub. He saw the man and his wife participate in a dozen activities with utter glee. "I just can''t believe this," the distraught husband said. The detective said, "What''s not to believe? It''s right up there on the screen!" The husband replied, "I can''t believe that my wife could be so much fun!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man sat in his attorney''s office. "Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer asked. "Give me the bad news first." "Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars." "That''s the bad news?" asked the man, incredulously. "I can''t wait to hear the terrible news." "The terrible news is that it''s of you and your secretary."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New York man was forced to take a day off from work to appear for a minor traffic summons. He grew increasingly restless as he waited hour after endless hour for his case to be heard. When his name was called late in the afternoon, he stood before the judge, only to hear that court would be adjourned for the day, and he would have to return the next day. "What for?" he snapped at the judge. His honor, equally irked by a tedious day and sharp query roared, "Twenty dollars contempt of court. That''s why!" Then, noticing the man checking his wallet, the judge relented. "That''s all right. You don''t have to pay now." The young man replied, "I''m just seeing if I have enough for two more words."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once knew a boy who was dating his left hand and having an affair with his right.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde goes on vacation to New York and wants to take a tour. She goes to ask about the tours and says, "So, where can I catch the bus for the walking tour?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Abby: My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and when I confront him, he denies everything. What''s worse, everyone knows he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Since he lost his job five years ago, he hasn''t even looked for a new one. All he does is buy cigars and cruise around and bullshit with his pals, while I have to work to pay the bills. Since our daughter went away to college he doesn''t even pretend to like me and hints that I am a lesbian. What should I do? Signed, Clueless Dear Clueless: Grow up and dump him. For Pete''s sake, you don''t need him any more. You''re a United States Senator from New York. Act like it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde boards a flight going to New York and sits in first class. A flight attendant asks to see her ticket. It''s a coach ticket. The flight attendant politely asks her to move. "I can do what eva I want! I''m a blonde." says the blonde. The flight attendant tells one of the other flight attendants that the blonde won''t move. The second flight attendant walks up to the blonde and says something to her and the blonde goes to coach. "What did you say to her?" asks the first flight attendant. "I told her that first class wasnt going to New York, only coach is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new man is brought into Prison Cell 102. Already there is a long-time resident who looks 100 years old. The new man looks at the old-timer inquiringly. The old-timer says, "Look at me. I''m old and worn out. You''d never believe that I used to live the life of Riley. I wintered on the Riviera, had a boat, four fine cars, the most beautiful women, and I ate in all the best restaurants of France." The new man asked, "What happened?" "One day Riley reported his credit cards missing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is eating out at a very fancy restaurant with her family. Right then she sees an ice carving of a dolphin by the wall. She says to the waiter, "I love that ice carving, but what do you do with it when it melts?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: "I am placed in the door with my seeing eye dog and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release ring for me and out I go with the dog." "But how do you know when you are going to land?" he was asked. "I have a very keen sense of smell, and I can smell the trees and grass when I am 300 feet from the ground" he answered. "But how do you know when to lift your legs for the final arrival on the ground?" he was again asked. He answered: "Oh, the dog''s leash goes slack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was telling her priest a Polack joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don''t you know I''m Polish?" "Oh, I''m sorry," the blonde apologizes, "do you want me to start over and talk slower?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wonder if you are a redneck....Well, if you have been married four times and still have the same in-laws you must be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sunday''s sermon was -- Forgive Your Enemies. Toward the end of the service, the Minister asked, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?" 80 percent of the congregation held up their hands. The Minister then repeated his question. All responded this time except one small elderly lady. "Mrs. Jones, are you not willing to forgive your enemies?" the minister asked. "I don''t have any." She replied. smiling sweetly. "Mrs. Jones, That is very unusual. How old are you?" "Ninety-Eight." She replied. "Oh, Mrs. Jones. Would you please come down in front and tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years and not have an enemy in the world." The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said, "I outlived the bitches."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The tourist had lost his way on a back road and stopped at the farmhouse to ask if he could be put up for the night. "Well, we''re a mighty crowded, since there''s already someone in the spare room" replied the farmer. "But I guess you can stay if you don''t mind sharing the bed with a red haired schoolteacher." "Look," said the tourist, "I want you to know I''m a gentleman." "Well," mused the farmer, "as far as I can tell, so is the red haired schoolteacher."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some race horses are staying in a stable. One of them starts to boast about his track record. "In the last 15 races, I''ve won 8 of them!" Another horse breaks in, "Well, in the last 27 races, I''ve won 19!" "Oh, that''s good, but in the last 36 races, I''ve won 28!" says another, flicking his tail. At this point, they notice that a greyhound has been sitting there, listening. "I don''t mean to boast," says the greyhound, "but in my last 90 races, I''ve won 88 of them!" The horses are clearly amazed. "Wow!" says one, after a hushed silence. "A talking dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top Ten Reasons to Procrastinate 1.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many colorguard girls does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Five, one to call the colorguard forward and four to take it down with a ceremony.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys enter a disabled swimming contest. The first has no arms. The second no legs and the third has no body, just a head. They all line up, the whistle blows and "splash" they''re all in the pool The guy with no arms takes the lead instantly but the guy with no legs is closing fast. The head of course sank straight to the bottom. Ten lengths later and the guy with no legs finishes first. He can still see bubbles coming from the bottom of the pool, so he decides he had better dive down to rescue him. He picks up the head, swims back up to the surface and places the head at the side of the pool, where upon the head starts coughing and sputtering. Eventually the head catches his breath and shouts: "Three years I''ve spent learning to swim with my !@#$% ears, then two minutes before the whistle, some idiot puts a swimming cap on me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do PSP''s and Michael Jackson have in common? The both get turned on by little boys!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat she''s scared to look at low fat food!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did u here Michael Jackson is sick? He had a 10 year old penis!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the cemetary so crowded? Everyone was dying to get in!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid said "I have a dirty joke; a kid fell in the mud". Another kid said, "I know a dirty joke; two kids fell into a pile of mud". Then the other kid said, "Well, I bet I have the dirtest joke of all; 2 pigs fell into a pile of mud and 3 came out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman hurries home, screeches her car into the driveway, runs into the house, slams the door and shouts at the top of her lungs, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!" The husband says, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?" "Doesn''t matter," she says. "Just get the hell out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joke: Why does Snoop Dogg Carry an umbrella? Answer: For Drizzle my nizzle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat the other day she was late to work and her stomach was an hour early.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t follow in my footsteps, I walk into walls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are dumb blonde jokes so short? A: So brunettes can remember them. Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? A: You pick it up pull the pin & throw it back. Q: What happened to the blonde tap dancer? A: She slipped off and fell down the drain. Q: How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer? A: The joystick is wet. Q: What''s the quickest way to get into a blondes pants? A: Pick them up off the floor. Q: Why don''t blonds play frisbee? A: It hurts their teeth. Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted! Q: How do blonde braincells die ? A: Alone. Q: Why don''t blondes eat bananas? A: They can''t find the zipper. Q: How did the blonde try to kill the fish? A: She tried to drown it. Q: What''s the difference between a blonde and a 747? A: Not everyone has been in a 747.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Yoo who? No thanks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While at work this man heard a very funny knock-knock joke. He told himself, "Although my wife is blonde I''m sure she will get this one!" Upon arriving home that night he proceeded to tell his wife about this joke he had heard. "Knock-knock," he said. She said, "Hold on honey, let me answer the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s stinks so bad, she puts on Secret and it told on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends went to the mall to go shopping; one was a brunette and the other was blonde. As they were shopping, the blonde suddenly said: "That girl could pass as my twin." The brunette starts laughing. The blonde says: "What is so funny?" The brunette says, "That was a mirror."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if when someone says: "Do you have any duct tape?" And you say: "I don''t have any ducks on tapes but I''ve got some on my wall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little johnny was heard praying in a loud voice a week before his birthday. "Dear God I pray that I will get a computer game for my birthday!" "Why are you shouting" asked his mother "God isn''t deaf?!?!?!?!?" "I know said Johnny, but grandma is!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama is so fat people run around her for exercize', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you tell if this lady is blonde? After placing an order in the drive-thru, the lady came on the speaker and asked: "Is that for here, or to go?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, when she was laying on the beach, everyone was screaming, saying "Look it''s Free Willy!!!!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when someone wants to shake her hand she has to give directions!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breasts in the mirror. He asks, "What are you doing?" She replies, "I went to the doctor today, and he told me I have the breasts of a 25 year old." The husband retorts, "Well, what did he say about your 50 year old ass?" She replied, "Frankly dear, your name never came up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette doing laundry asked her blonde friend to help her find a match for her sock. The blonde replied, ''''What for? Are you going to set it on fire?''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mathematician, an accountant and an economist apply for the same job. The interviewer calls in the mathematician and asks "What do two plus two equal?" The mathematician replies "Four." The interviewer asks "Four, exactly?" The mathematician looks at the interviewer incredulously and says, "Yes, four, exactly." Then the interviewer calls in the accountant and asks the same question "What do two plus two equal?" The accountant says, "On average, four - give or take ten percent, but on average, four." Then the interviewer calls in the economist and poses the same question "What do two plus two equal?" The economist gets up, locks the door, closes the shade, sits down next to the interviewer and says "What do you want it to equal?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills off brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, constantly making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Day 751: My captors continue to torment me with bizarre dangling objects. They eat lavish meals in my presence while I am forced to subsist on dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of eventual escape -- that, and the satisfaction I get from occasionally ruining some piece of their furniture. I fear I may be going insane. Yesterday, I ate a houseplant. Tomorrow I may eat another.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do blonde brain cells die? Unused...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many stupid blondes does it take to make a circuit? Two - one to stand inside the bath, the other to pass the hair dryer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a blonde and a computer? A: You only have to punch information into a computer once.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch a cold? A: No need for them to worry about blowing their brains out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve often wanted to drown my troubles, but i can''t get my wife to go swimming!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so nasty I was on the phone with her, and she gave me an ear infection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s breath is so stank, that they consider it a weapon of mass destruction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Few women admit their age, Few men act theirs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never test the depth of water with both feet. Don''t take candy from strangers, unless they offer you a ride. I''ll start exercising as soon as i get into shape. If you have something to say, raise your hand and put it over your mouth. Maybe you should go to e-bay and buy a clue. Earth is full. go home. Gee, I''d like to care, but I wasn''t given that gene. Mirrors don''t lie, and lucky for you, they can''t laugh either. (i like this one) If you can''t laugh at yourself, at least let me do it. I don''t know what makes you so dumb, but it really works. Men are from Mars, Women are from Visa. (ok that was kind''a dumb) I used to have super powers but my therapist took them away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call it when someone farts in a gay bar? A love call.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do lesbians handle their liquor? A. By the ears. (Lick her)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do tight pants and a cheap motel have in common? A. No ball room', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What did the pedophile say when he got out of jail? A. I feel like a kid again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. If they bring shrimp home on shrimp boats, fish home on fish boats, and clams home on clam boats, what do they bring crabs home on? A. The Captain''s dinghy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a hamburger shop and orders a regular meal. Later, the waitress brings him his meal. He takes a bite out of it, and notices there''s a small hair in the hamburger. He begins yelling frantically at the waitress, exclaiming, "Waitress! There''s a hair in my hamburger! I demand to see what''s going on!" So, the waitress takes him back to the kitchen where the cook is, and to the man''s demise, he sees the cook take the meat patty and flatten it under his arm pit. The distraught customer says, "That''s disgusting!" Then the waitress says, "You think that''s disgusting? You should see him make donuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was standing in a crowded lift of the hotel she was staying in. When a man got in and accidentally elbowed her in the breast. The man said, "I''m sorry! But if your heart is as soft as your tit, you''ll forgive me." so the woman replies, "If you dick is as hard as your elbow then I am staying in room 113."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A patient was waiting for some results from his doctor. When the doctor arrives he says, "I have some good news and some bad news which do you want first." The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You''ve got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You''ve also got Alzheimer''s Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that''s not so bad. At least I don''t have AIDS."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer and a MCSE (Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer) were out driving, when their car broke down, and they couldn''t get it started. The mechanical engineer suggested that it was a failure somewhere in the drive train, but after checking it out he found that the engine and transmission were fine. The electrical engineer thought it might be the ignition system; lifted the hood, checked for a spark, and found that everything was OK. The MCSE was driving, and suddenly gets out of the car, slams the door, opens the hood and looks inside, slams that, gets back into the car, opens and closes all the windows and looks at his passengers and says, "There, it should start right up now..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: How many asian people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Asian Man: Whats a lightbulb?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde goes to the store and gets a box of almonds. As she is allergic to nuts, she asks a clerk at the counter, "Does this contain nut ingredients?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond goes into a pizza shop for a snack. She orders, "May I have a veggie pizza slice with all the works?" The worker says, "That would be our combo pizza." The blond says, "No, thanks. I''ll stay with the veggie slice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob and Joe, a couple of personal injury lawyers, were discussing conditions in the legal profession. "How''s business?" asked Bob. "Absolutely rotten!" responded Joe. "How have you been doing?" "Even worse," Bob replied. "I just chased an ambulance twelve miles and found a LAWYER inside it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Acme Rope, Inc. - Knot your ordinary company. Acme Mine Shafts - Drop in any time Acme Lollipops - One lick and you''ll stick with us. Acme Light Company - We have lots of bright ideas. Acme Clown Make-up - Let us put a smile on your face. Acme Perfume Corp. - We love it when business stinks. Acme Air Conditioning - We show people how to chill out. Acme Toy Company - Our work is kids'' play. Acme Perfume Company - Our work is all dollars and scents. Acme Almond Company - We''re nuts! Acme Sheep Farm - Our mind is on ewe. Acme Calculators - We help you solve your problems. Acme Flower Bulbs - We root for you. Acme Psychologists - Visit us and you won''t go away mad! Acme Poultry Management - Let us count your chickens before they hatch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only concept they understand is "mine".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man stepped onto the overnight train and told the conductor, "I need you to wake me up in Philadelphia. I''m a deep sleeper and can be ornery when I get up, but no matter what, I want you to help me make that stop. Here''s $100 to make sure." The conductor agreed. The man fell asleep, and when he awoke he heard the announcement that the train was approaching New York. Furious, he collared the conductor. "I gave you $100 to make sure I got off in Philadelphia, you worthless fool!" "Wow," another passenger said to his traveling companion. "Is that guy ever mad!" "Yeah," his companion replied. "But not half as mad as that guy they forced off the train in Philadelphia."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As is known, there is a large leper colony in Hawaii. To help ease the pain the patients have while there, a hockey rink was built to provide them entertainment. Only problem was that only one game ever got played on the rink. Within two minutes of game time, there was a face off in the corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 8 men, One to get off the couch, One to find a lightbulb, One to find a ladder, One to screw it in, One to shock himself and shock everyone around, One to call a docter, One to find out that it wasn''t out, the switch was off, and finally, one to sit back in laugh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Overheard by a professor in the halls a few weeks after the semester starts- Male student to another male student- "Yeah, I signed up for a women''s studies course. It wasn''t what I expected it to be." "Really? Why is that?" "Well, it involves all this re', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the squirrel go to the acorn shop? He broke his nuts on something!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and some-one will hear you, but fart and you''re on your own!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The squirrel''s eyes widened as he tried to move but froze when he realized........ He''d buried the wrong nuts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, in the mental institute, a doctor visited one of his new patients. "How are you today?" he asked, when he saw his patient. "Oh. I''m fine thank you very much. How about you?" replied the patient. "Oh, I''m fine," answered the doctor, while thinking if he should let this patient go seeing as how he was polite and all. "So, did you sleep alright last night?" "Oh, heavens no. The mosquitoes were such a bother, I got so angry that I put up a mosquito net around the bed but I climbed under the bed. HA! They can bite whatever they want inside the net, but I''ll be safe and sound under the bed," answered the patient with an air of dignity. "Never mind."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this guy in the mental institute who was taking his medicine that the nurse gave him. The same nurse was walking past his room and saw him shaking very vigorously. Intrigued, the nurse asked,"Dear patient, why are you shaking? Are you cold?" Still shaking, the patient replied, "No, my dear nurse, the bottle of medicine you gave me said ''shake before drinking'' but I forgot to shake!" "Oh dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s gray, has four legs, and a trunk? A mouse on vacation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Think of a number. 2. Multiply it by 3. 3. Now add 5. 4. Take away the number you first thought of. 5. Now add 7. 6. Subtract 2. 7. Add back the number you first thought of. 8. Now, close your eyes. > > > > > > > > Dark, isn''t it? :-)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m trying computer dating, at least I''m not getting dumped... but I do get deleted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bloke and his wife went to a family planning clinic. "We''ve been married for ten years and we''ve got no kids", said the husband. "And the next-door neighbors say it''s because we''re stupid." "Nonsense," smiled the doctor. "It''s probably to do with your diet. Or it might be a question of timing. How many times a week do you do it?" "Do what?" asked the wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('if stealing kids is kidnapping,is stealing adults oldnapping?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where does a Dog go when he loses his tail? Answer: A retailer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do snakes always lose in court? Answer: They don''t have a leg to stand on!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the gay midget? He came out of the cupboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it better to be killed by a shark than by a lawyer? Answer: The shark would be brief.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While trying to escape through Pakistan, Osama Bin Laden found a bottle on a beach and picked it up. Suddenly a female Genie arose from the bottle and with a smile said: "Master, may I grant you one wish?" "You ignorant, unworthy daughter-of-a-dog! Don''t you know who I am? I don''t need any common woman giving me anything", barked Bin Laden. The shocked genie said, "Please, I must grant you a wish or I will be returned to that bottle forever." Osama thought a moment, grumbling about the impertinence of the woman, and said, "Very well, I want to awaken with three white women in my bed in the morning; so just grant it and be off with you!" The annoyed genie said, "So be it!" and disappeared. The next morning Bin Laden woke up in bed with Lorena Bobbitt, Tonya Harding, and Hillary Clinton. His penis was gone, his knee was broken, and he had no health insurance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat that when she went to school she had to sit next to everybody. Yo Momma so fat, her belt size is Equator. Yo Momma so fat, this guy was having sex with her, then rolled over twice and was still on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gay couple (of guys) and a lesbian couple decide to leave from New York to Miami at the same time. The two couples are neighbors and they plan on driving the same route. so the question is who gets to Miami first? Why the lesbians of course! They go lickety split while the guys are still at home packin''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, 2 blondes walked into a tanning salon. One blonde said, "A tan for 2 please!" The cashier said, "Ok," filled out a form for them and asked, "are you two sisters?" They chuckled and replied, "No, we aren''t even Catholic."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know that your dog bit my mother-in-law yesterday? "Is that so? Well, I suppose you''ll sue me for damages?" "Not at all. What''ll you take for the dog?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Arab diplomat visiting the U.S. for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was unused to the salt in American foods (french fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies etc.) and was constantly sending his manservant Abdul to fetch him a glass of water. Time and again, Abdul would scamper off and return with a glass of water, but then came the time when he returned empty-handed. "Abdul, you son of an ugly camel, where is my water?" demanded the Grand Emir. "A thousand pardons, O Illustrious One," stammered the wretched Abdul. "White man sit on well.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women as Explained by Engineers Finally- an explanation of Woman that makes sense to a man! Element: Woman Discoverer: Adam Atomic Mass: Accepted as 55kg, but known to vary from 45kg, to 225 kg. Physical properties ___________________ Body surface normally covered with a film of powder and paint. Boils at absolutely nothing-freezes for no apparent reason. Found in various grades, ranging from virgin material, to common ore. Chemical properties ____________________ Reacts well to gold, platinum, and all precious stones. Explodes spontaneously without reason or warning. The most powerful money-reducing agent known to man. Common Use __________________ Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars. Can greatly aid relaxation. Can be a very effective cleaning agent. Hazards __________________ Turns green when placed alongside a superior specimen. Possession of more than one is possible, but specimens must never make eye contact!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat, her nickname is "Damn." Yo mama''s so big, when she stands up the sun goes out. Yo mama''s so dirty, the US Government uses her bath water for chemical weapons Yo mama'' so hairy, when she goes to the circus the bearded lady protests against non-union workers. Yo mama''s so hairy, she shaves with a weedwacker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the beginning of term, we were supposed to portray what we learned during holidays by acting in a play for the school. Here I was known as the best actress in class so I was given the role of a secondary student who goes out with a rich man''s reckless son. During the rehearsals, everything went perfect until the real day on stage. Acting pregnant with clothes stuffed in my dress, I begged the rich man''s son not to leave me in such a condition when suddenly my BABY fell out of the TUMMY... I was so embarrassed as the whole school burst out laughing hysterically. But with talent, I knelt down n cried that silence fell upon their heads thinking it was part of the play... I was still voted the best.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A handsome gentleman gets in an accident and finds himself in hospital soon after recovering. Shocked, he asks the nurse how he got there and if he has all his body parts on. "You only lost your arms, sir, but you will be ok," was her reply. Very disappointed that he had lost part of his life, he decides to throw himself over the hospital on the last block but as he is about to do that, he notices someone on the street in the same situation, but he was dancing vigorously. He decides to find out how he keeps happy in such a situation. "Buddy, tell me what is your secret to happiness," he said. "You''ve got no idea what it takes to scatch myself. My chest is itchy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jason showed his buddy the beautiful diamond ring he had bought his girlfriend for her birthday. "I thought she wanted a four-wheel-drive vehicle," ventured his friend. "She did," Jason said. "But where am I going to find a fake Jeep?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, Violets are blue, I copied your test and I flunked too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like to sleep, and stay in bed, all because you cracked a hammer on my head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that if you fart in church you have to sit in your own pew?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Spock find in the toilet? The captain''s log.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the two peanuts who got mugged on their walk down the street? They were assaulted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vincent Van Gogh had a really large family. Here''s a listing of some of the lessor known ones... The grandfather who moved to Yugoslavia ........ U. Gogh The brother who bleached all his clothes white .. Hue Gogh The cousin who was a blues musician- Indi-Gogh The fruity brother- Man-Gogh The sister who wore a mini skirt to dance in bars ... Go Gogh The real obnoxious brother .......... Please Gogh The brother who ate prunes ............ Gotta Gogh The uncle who worked at a convenience store ....... Stop N Gogh His dizzy aunt ............. Verti Gogh The cousin that moved to Illinois ......... Chicah Gogh His magician uncle .............. Wherediddy Gogh The cousin who lived in Mexico .......... Amee Gogh Another cousin who lived in Mexico ......... Green Gogh Nephew that drove a stage coach .......... Wells Far Gogh Aunt who was a good dancer .............. Tan Gogh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a schizophrenic and so am I.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell a boy chromosome from a girl chromosome? Pull down their genes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For Stupid: Hey, your house is calling, and they''re missing their idiot. Where were you when God gave out brains? How many times have you crawled into the hole that said ''lowers your IQ''? Did you get dropped on your head when you were little and your mom said you were just ''special''? Did you like getting hit by the stupid stick? For Ugly: Did you perhaps get run over by a truck sometime in your life? Note: You can use stupid insults and change them to ugly insults by a word and vice versa.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the white girl go have sex with a Mexican? Because her teacher told her to do an ESE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ms. Suzy had a steam boat, the steam boat had a bell! The steam boat went to heaven, Ms. Suzy went to... Hello operator, please give me number nine! And if you disconnect me, I''ll chop off your... Behind the frigerator, there was a piece of glass! Ms. Suzy sat upon it, and broke her big fat... Ask me no more questions, tell me no more lies! The boys are in the bathroom, zipping up their... Flies are in the meadow, bees are in the park! Ms. Suzy''s with her boyfriend, kissing in the d-a-r-k, d-a-r-k dark, dark, dark!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor! I have a serious pronblem, I can never remember what I just said. "When did you first notice this problem?" "What problem?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a car skidded on wet pavement and struck a telephone pole, several bystanders ran over to help the driver. A woman was the first to reach the victim, but a man rushed in and pushed her aside. "Step aside lady," he barked. "I''ve taken a course in first-aid!" The woman watched for a few minutes, then tapped him on the shoulder. "Pardon me," she said. "But when you get to the part about calling a doctor, I''m right here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between man and Superman? Man wears underwear under the trousers and Superman wears it over the trousers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did Adam and Eve have belly buttons? What happens if you pop the popcorn upside down? Why aren''t HAMburgers made out of ham? And my favorite: Donde estan mis pantalones?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only a redneck visits a trailer park to look for home decorating ideas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, 15 year old Christy came home from shopping with her Auntie Kim and Auntie Flo. Christy says to her 6 year old sister, "Auntie Kim has bad taste, but Auntie Flo has good taste." Her sister then says, "How do you know? Have you bitten them before?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why am I stronger than Tarzan? Because I can beat on my chest without screaming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a trip from California to Indiana, it didn''t help that my connecting flight from Denver was delayed twice because of mechanical problems. Then, after we were aloft, I noticed the lights began flickering. I mentioned this to a flight attendant. "I''ll take care of it," she said. Moments later the lights went out. Clearly she had solved the problem by turning off all the lights. A passenger across the aisle who had been watching me leaned over and said, "Whatever you do, please don''t ask about the engines."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The warden, addressing the three instigators of a failed prison riot, said, "I would like to know two things. First: Why did you revolt? Second: How did you get out of your cell?" One of the three men stepped forward, "Warden, we rebelled because the food is awful." "I see. And what did you use to break the bars?" the warden asked. Replied the spokesman, "French Toast..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mood of a woman An angel of truth and a dream of fiction, A woman is a bundle of contradiction, She''s afraid of a wasp, will scream at a mouse, But will tackle a stranger alone in the house. Sour as vinegar, sweet as a rose, She''ll kiss you one minute, then turn up her nose, She''ll win you in rage, enchant you in silk, She''ll be stronger than brandy, milder than milk, At times she''ll be vengeful, merry and sad, She''ll hate you like poison, and love you like mad. The moods of a man! Hungry! Horny! Sleepy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a stupid warning label: If you look at a fire extinguisher, it will say "Non-flamable"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you fall down a bottomless pit... do you eventually die of starvation?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t the glue inside the bottle dry?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Isn''t it fascinating how feet smell and noses run?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think about it, a muffin is just a bald cupcake!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As far as we Americans know, Osama Bin Laden could, quite possibly, be right here in New York, posing as a cab driver, and we''d never know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there''s no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can''t paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can''t paper do this to people? Why isn''t notebook paper constantly suffocating students while they take notes in class? I''ll tell you why: because paper can''t beat anybody; a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/paper/scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to beat me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, "Oh shit, I''m sorry. I thought paper would protect you, you asshole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you put a slinky on an escalator, would it go forever?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Hellen Keller''s mother punish her??? rearranging her furniture.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a redneck groom about to get married. As he puts on the beaver pelt suit, he is talking to his dad. "Hey Uncle Jim, I''m kind of worried. My fiance told me she''s still a virgin." "Why is that an issue?" the dad says. "Well, if she isn''t good enough for her family, why would she be good enough for ours?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that the goverment finds Native American chiefs more important than presidents? The new head on Mt. Rushmore is at least twice the size of the others. It''s the head of an Indian!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the sick pony say to its mother? I''m a little hoarse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes for her pelvic exam. While the doctor is doing the exam, he notices bikini tan lines, and she has sandals on that say "hecho en mexico" (made in mexico). So he casually asks her, "So did you enjoy your trip to Mexico?" She sits up a little and stares at him with this look of disbelief. "You can tell that just from a pelvic exam?!?!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nurse was giving a patient a check up and came to the task of taking his temperature. So the patient came in and she told him to take his pants and boxers off so he hesitantly did so. She then put somthing in his butt. She had some time, so she went to the bank and was going to withdraw some cash. As she went to get her pen to sign the reciept, she took out the rectal themometer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever heard of the kissing shield? No? then look at this list of crazy inventions people just like you made; Kissing shield Face bake Horse diaper Whopper wheels Skateboard pirate Light bulb changer Beach boots Remote controlled horse Flying bike Baby bottom art Pump power Dummy chicken farmer Airplane moisturizer Alarm fork All terrain stroller Aqua swing Baby cage Ball blinders Banana head BIRD CAT TRAP FEEDER Boob tube Boatless water skiing Hijacker detector And many more dumb inventions soon to come. Be watching!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Grizzly with no teeth? A gummy bear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dentist was getting ready to clean an elderly lady''s teeth. He noticed that she was a little nervous, so he began to tell her a story as he was putting on his surgical gloves. "Do you know how they make these rubber gloves?" She said, "No, I don''t have any idea." "Well," he spoofed, "Down in Mexico they have this big building set up with a large tank of latex, and the workers are all picked according to hand size. Each individual walks up to the tank, dips their hands in and then walks around for a bit while the latex sets and dries right onto their hands! Then they peel off the gloves and throw them into the big ''Finished Goods'' crate and start the process all over again." She didn''t laugh one bit. Five minutes later, during the procedure, he had to stop cleaning her teeth because she burst out laughing. The old woman blushed and exclaimed, "I just suddenly thought about how they must make condoms!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love my Job, I love the Pay! I love it more and more each day. I love my Boss, he''s the best! I love his boss and all the rest. I love my Office and its location - I hate to have to go on vacation. I love my furniture, drab and gray, and the paper that piles up every day! I love my chair in my padded cell! There''s nothing else I love so well. I love to work among my peers - I love their leers and jeers and sneers. I love my computer and all its software, I hug it often though it doesn''t care... I love each program and every file, I try to understand once in a while!! I''m happy to be here, I am I am, I''m happy to give lots of taxes to my Uncle Sam. I love this Work, I love these Chores. I love the meetings with deadly bores. I love my Job - I''ll say it again - I even love these friendly Men. The men who''ve come to visit today, In those lovely white coats to take me away!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most people don''t know that back in 1912 Hellman''s mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the "Titanic" was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after New York City. Mexicans were crazy about the stuff. The Mexican people were eagerly awaiting delivery and were disconsolate ("desperados") at the loss. So much so that they declared a national day of mourning which they still observe today. It is known, of course, as ...Sinko de Mayo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven. God comes and says "I want the men to make two lines. One line for the men that dominated their women on earth and the other line for the men that were whipped by their women. Also, I want all the women to go with St Peter." Said and done, the next time God looks the women are gone and there are two lines. The line of the men that were whipped was 100 miles long, on the line of men that dominated women there was only one man. God got mad and said, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created you in my image, and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons that stood up and made me proud, learn from him! Tell them, my son, how did you manage to be the only one on that line?" The man said, "I don''t know. My wife told me to stand here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred was getting out of his car to go to an electronics store and had his dog in the car with him. "Stay," said Fred. A blond was witnessing all this and said to Fred, "Would it just be easier to put it in park?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman at a party walked up to a man and told him, ''''If you were my husband I would poison your drink." The man replied, ''''If you were my wife I would drink it.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:What do you call a Bass Clarinet player with half a brain? A: Gifted', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a cop walks in to a barber shop and gets a haircut. He tries to pay the barber but the barber says, "Im doing free haircuts this week." The cop thanks him and walks away. The next day there is a box of a dozen donuts on the barber''s desk. A republican walks in and gets a haircut. He tries to pay the barber but the barber says, "Im doing free haircuts this week." The republican thanks him and walks away. The next day there is a self help book on his desk. A democrat walks in and gets a haircut. He tries to pay the barber but barber says, "I''m doing free haircuts this week." The next day, there are 20 democrats at the door waiting for a free haircut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so old she sat next to Jesus in the 3rd grade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do lawyers always wear a tie? To keep back the foreskin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blond make a square pie? Because Pi(r) squared!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how, in the olden days, you were named for what you did? For instance, if you were a blacksmith, your last name would be Smith, if you were a baker, your last name was Baker. It kind of makes me wonder what John Hancock''s ancestors did for a living.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mildred, the church gossip, and self-appointed monitor of the church''s morals, kept sticking her nose into other people''s business. Several members did not approve of her extra-curricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence. She made a mistake, however, when she accused George, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town''s only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told George and several others that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing. George, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn''t explain, defend, or deny. He said nothing. Later that evening, George quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred''s house............. and left it there all night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500 man elite fighting unit called the US Redneck Special Forces (USRSF). These North Carolina, South Carolina, Kentucky, West Virginia, Mississippi, Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, Texas and Tennessee boys will be dropped into Iraq and have been given the following facts about Terrorists: 1. The season opened today 2. There is no limit 3. They taste just like chicken 4. They don''t like beer, pickups, Harley Davidson''s, country music or Jesus 5. They are DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE for the death of Dale Earnhardt This mess in Iraq should be over IN A WEEK', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Abbey! Abbey who? Abbey stung me on the nose!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Acid! Acid who? Acid down and be quiet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Acid! Acid who? Acidently on purpose!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Bach! Bach who? Bach to work!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pretty young blonde visiting her new doctor for the first time found herself alone in a small waiting room. She began undressing nervously, preparing herself for the upcoming examination. Just as she draped the last of her garments over the back of a chair, a light rap sounded on the door and a young doctor strode in. Coming to an abrupt halt, the doctor looked his nude patient up and down carefully and with considerable appreciation. "Miss Smith," he said finally, "it seems quite obvious to me that until today you have never undergone an eye examination."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was eating a fruit rollup once, you know, with the paper on the bottom...well the instructions were "Do not eat paper." Noooo! I thought the paper was part of the snack!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what happened to the lost boy? he came to a house and wrote a joke that was exactly like this except in larger font and with a little more umph ya know what i mean a very humerous joke in fact i do believe he is working on more ya know i lied i ain''t lost i just like making very very very long jokes sorta like this one ya know what i wrote is called a run on sentence my papa told me about run ons they are fun i can''t imagine not having a papa if you don''t have one i feel bad for you starting at ''starting'' i wrote 100 words thats a lot but still my favorite number is464,546,879,6 but i won''t go till there i can''t believe i counted my words how nerdy i''m stopping soon wait......... 127 ha buh bye', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s mother took her 6-year-old son with her to the bank. They were in line behind a rather obese lady. As the mother patiently waited, Little Johnny looked at the women in front of him and observed loudly, "Hey, Mom, she''s really fat." The lady looked at Johnny, made eye contact with his mother and gave an understanding smile. Little'' Johnny received a reprimand. After a minute or two, Little Johnny spread his hands as far as they will go and loudly said, "I bet her butt is ''that'' wide." At this the lady glared at Johnny. His embarrassed mother severely scolds her son. Again after a couple of minutes Little Johnny stated loudly, "Look how the fat hangs over her belt." The lady turned and told Johnny''s mother to control her child and his mother threatened him with severe bodily harm. The lady''s pager begins to go off. Lil'' Johnny yelled in a panic at the top of his voice, "Run for your life, she''s backing up"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politians are like constipated people-they''re full of shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the pirate say when he got cold? Shiver me timbers!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a boy walked in the classroom. The teacher asked him why he was late; he said he was on top of Blueberry Hill. The next boy walked in and the teacher asked him why he was late; he said he was on top of Blueberry Hill. The last boy walked in and the teacher asked him why he was late. He said he was on top of Blueberry Hill. Then a girl walked in and the teacher said, "Let me guess, you''re late beacause you were on top of Blueberry Hill". Then the girl said, "I am Blueberry Hill".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 16-year-old girl bought herself a very tiny bikini. Very proud, she came home and put it on. She then showed her mother how she looked in it. "What do you think mom?" she asked. Her mother replied, "If I wore that when I was your age, you would be 5 years older."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brother and sister are in a terrible car accident and the brother is badly injured. At the hospital the doctor tells the sister, "His brain is dead, but his pulse is still beating." The sister replies, "Oh no! We''ve never had a Democrat in the family before!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give blood. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Go skateboarding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can only be kind to one person a day. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Today is not your day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I walk the dogs, I take a handful of black plastic bags, since the local council requires us to ''clear up after our dogs'' or face a stiff fine. This being the wild blackberry season, I use a spare (clean!) one to hold the blackberries I pick on the way. Coming off the hill, I passed an American visitor, who said something, looking at the bulging bag. "I''m taking them home for supper - they''re delicious with cream," I said. She turned white. Some minutes later I worked out that she had said that the dog-waste bin was just round the corner. If I see her again, I must invite her to supper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was at a department store for the first time and was very confused. The man beside her was getting irritated at the blonde because she kept asking him so many questions about the store. He said, "Please! Just stop asking me so many questions!" "Oh," the blonde replied. "Why?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid 1: You did it again! Kid 2: What? What did I do? Kid 1: You know, that thing. Kid 2: What thing? Kid 1: That thing when your lips move and sound comes out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have the right to remain silent. Exercise it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl, "Will you marry me?" The girl said, "NO!" The guy lived happily ever after and went fishing and hunting. He played golf a lot, drank beer, and farted whenever he wanted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you never play poker in the jungle? -because there are too many cheatahs!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Scottish nuns had just arrived to the US by boat when one said to the other, "I heard that the occupants of this country actually eat dogs." "Odd," her companion replied, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do." Nodding emphatically, the mother superior pointed to a hot dog vendor and they both walked towards it. "Two dogs, please," said one. The vendor was only too pleased to oblige and he wrapped both hot dogs in foil. Excited, the nuns hurried over to a bench and began to unwrap their ''dogs.'' The mother superior was first to open hers, then, stared at it for a moment, leaned over to the other nun and whispered cautiously, "What part did you get?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Say this out loud: this is a cat is is a cat how is a cat to is a cat keep is a cat a is a cat dumbass is a cat busy is a cat for is a cat forty is a cat seconds is a cat * * * * * * * * * * * * * now read only the first word of each line!! THIS is a cat IS is a cat HOW is a cat TO is a cat KEEP is a cat A is a cat DUMBASS is a cat BUSY is a cat FOR is a cat FORTY is a cat SECONDS is a cat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman went in for a breast exam. The doctor said, "Have a seat. I have to numb your breasts first." The woman said, "Okay." So the doctor put his face between her breasts and said, "Numb, numb, numb, numb, numb."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you have cookie for lunch? ''Cuz your face is kinda krummy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Moses wandering through the desert for 40 years? Because blokes refuse to ask for directions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the medical term for a woman getting a sex change? An adadictomy (add-a-dick-to-me)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish couple were having a dinner party and the wife, Patty, was very concerned that this dinner go off with out a hitch. She sent the husband, Phillip, off to get some escargot (snails) for an appetizer. She said to him "Don''t stop at the local pub, I need you back here right away." So off he goes. After a while he doesn''t come back and Patty is getting more and more nervous. About 5 hours later, after the dinner had ended, Phillip, obviously drunk, was just getting into the driveway of the house when he slipped and the snails went flying everywhere. Patty came out of the house and said to him, "Where have you been this whole time?" Thinking quickly Phillip bent down, looked at the snails and replied, "Come on, little fellers, you''re almost home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat that she fell over and made the Grand Canyon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The secret to enjoying a good wine is: 1 - Open the bottle to allow it to breathe. 2 - When it does not breathe, give it mouth-to-mouth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mother decided that 7-year-old Cathy should get something ''practical'' for her birthday. "Suppose we open a savings account for you?" mother suggested. Cathy was delighted. "It''s your account, darling," mother said as they arrived at the bank, "so you fill out the application." Cathy was doing fine until she came to the space for ''Name of your former bank.'' After a slight hesitation, she put down ''Piggy.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I did your mom... ...a favor by making you... ...lunch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the Iraqi chicken cross the road? A: To take over the other side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam: "Cas, phone for you!" Cas: "Okay, thanks, Sam." --BEEP OF PHONE BEING TURNED ON-- "Hello? Oh, hi...." --AFTER PHONE CONVERSATION-- Sam: "So, who was it?" Cas: "Heather." Sam: "What did she want?" Cas: "Our phone number."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 Hints to arguing with blondes: 1.) Use small easy to understand words. 2.) Keep your sentences short and to the point. 3.) Use, what I like to call, "Blonde logic" aka logic that only makes sense to them or on occasion other blondes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('May your troubles be as few and far between as your great-grandmother''s teeth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the worst time to be a rat or a mouse? A: When it''s raining cats and dogs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, when she walks down the street and hums, the kids all run after her, waving money and yelling, "Ice Cream truck! Ice Cream truck!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know... in Louisiana it is illegal to tie an alligator to a fire hydrant and leave it unattended? Really! It''s true!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Frenchman and the Italian were in the woods, hunting together when suddenly a beautiful blonde girl raced across their path, totally nude! "Would I love to eat that?" "Oui, oui!" The Frenchman said, smacking his lips. So the Italian shot her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are questions the answers to I wish I knew: If one hermaphrodite dates another hermaphrodite, are they gay, straight or bisexual? Why does the cat always use the litter box right before I need to brush my teeth? Who is Murphy and what sad life did he lead to have that law named after him? Why do they keep making things smaller and smaller when all that does is make them easier to lose? Why are there so many 24%s in my joke recomender? And why oh why are there so many of these lists?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women''s breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. After a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took Dr. Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do we know that Christ was Irish? Because he was 33; still lived at home; thought his mother was a virgin, and she thought he was the son of God.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is obvious. The downfall of the world is here. It is 2005 and we have lived on this earth for ages. I suppose it is about time for the end. Proof? You want proof? I have all the proof you will need: They let Brittney Spears reproduce. Ohh that poor poor child!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman had been married for ten years and decided to try and have kids. They had not been using birth control for the entire time they had been married, so they thought they may have a problem conceiving. The woman, who was hard of hearing, decided to go to the gynecologist and see if the problem was with her. The doctor examined her and came in to give her the conclusions. He said, "I''m sorry, but the problem is with you. You have insufficient passion, and if you ever have a baby, it will be a miracle." The woman was very upset and went home crying. Her husband got home and asked her what was wrong. She said, "The doctor told me I''ve got a fish up my passage and if I ever have a baby it will be a mackerel."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One, men will screw anything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Irishmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 50... 1 to hold the lightbulb, and 49 to drink ''till the room spins!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A male blue whale, can ejaculate 40 gallons of sperm during sex. Only 10% of that will get to the female. The other 36 gallons is left in the sea. No wonder the sea''s so salty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you catch an elephant? Dig a hole, put peanuts around it, fill it with ashes and when the elephant goes to eat the peanuts, kick him in the ash hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so old, she breast fed Methuselah.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Found in micellaneous things. If at first you don''t succeed, skydiving isn''t for you. I don''t have a short attention span, it''s just that I- Etc.:a sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do. My mind not only wanders; sometimes it leaves completely. If your dog is fat, you''re not getting enough exercise. Without geography, you''re nowhere. When someone tells you nothing is impossible, tell him to dribble a football. Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernail. Baseball is wrong; man with four balls cannot walk. Man who drives like hell, bound to get there. It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it. Crowded elevator smells different to midgets. Man who stands on toilet is high on pot. That will be all for now. Ciao', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a little Indian boy came up to an old man in the village (In the Indian heritage, the oldest are most wise). The little boy asks, "How do we Indians get their names? Like... Blackhawk, or Redeyes?" The old man says, "Well, actually, when they are born, the first thing we see is what we name them." "Oh! Okay, thanks!" says the little boy. "Any more questions, Two Dogs Fucking?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you want to know how to make a blonde''s eyes sparkle......Shine a flashlight in her ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you keep a blond from whistling while she is skydiving? A. Make sure she wears underwear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red Violets are blue God made me pretty What the heck happened to you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who''s not a creep. One who''s handsome, smart and strong, And doesn''t mind admitting when he''s wrong, One who thinks before he speaks, When he promises to call, he won''t wait two weeks. I pray that he is gainfully employed, And when I spend his cash he won''t be annoyed & opens my door & begs to do more Oh, send me a man who will make love to my mind, knows just what to say when I ask, "How Big is My Behind!?!" One who will kiss me till my body''s twitchin'', In the hall, the shower, the garden and the kitchen. I pray this man will love me no end, and never attempts to date my best friend. And, as I kneel and pray by my bed ... I look at the Butt Head you sent me instead! ~ Amen ~', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a boy said to his mom, "I''m a Picses, what are you?" The the mom answered, "Cancer." The boy then asked in a shocked state, "You killed Grandma?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed." "OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That''s terrible!" His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands. Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today in history class the topic was the Incas. Hoping to see if the students had done the reading, the teacher calls on random students and asks them questions. "Where could the Incas be found?" The teacher''s first question. "Jonie?" foolishly she called on the blonde. Not having actually done the homework, and only halfway hearing the question, she guesses: "In the pen?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was going to church on Sunday. His mom gave him $40 so that he could put $20 in the offering plate and use $20 to buy anything on the way. On his way to the church he lost the $40, so he went back to look for it. He found $20, then looked up and said, "God, here is mine. Go and look for yours!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady was at the bar when a guy started hitting on her. She said "I''ll send my pants to you from the dry cleaners, that way you can get into them on you own time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Flea: (noun) a small, wingless, bloodsucking parasite (see also) a. Brother-in-law b. lawyer c. politician', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock, Who''s there? Alarm. Alarm who? Alarm the cops about all the partying I''ve been having!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I-rish my beer was full...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men were riding on a train. One of them had a bottle in his coat pocket, and the other one wanted it. Finally the train went through a dark tunnel and the man was able to take the bottle out and drink up all the "whisky" inside of it. Then he put it back into the other man''s pocket. When the train came out of the tunnel, the man who owned the bottle took it out of his pocket, opened it up, and spit into it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you keep a jack ass in suspense? A. I`ll tell you tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a lighted dynamite stick, please hold it until I get back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Help reduce air pollution, stop breathing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Keep talking, someday you''ll say something intelligent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Keep talking, I always yawn when I''m interested.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mouth is so big you could swallow a whole banana... ...sideways', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone dropped $50. Who do you think will pick it up? A.) An honest politician B.) A five year old child C.) Santa Claus B.) A 5 year old child, all the others aren''t real.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A. Because it was dead Q Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because it was stapled to the dog! Q. Why did the tree fall over? A. Because it thought it was a game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Did you hear about the man who had a shower without getting his hair wet? He was bald! 2. Did you hear about the boy who was named after his father? His name was Dad!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) How does a blonde make a stainless ink pen? A.) She doesn''t put ink in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so stupid, when her softball coach said to keep her eye on the ball, she stared at the softball for 3 days straight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story told to me. A big city news anchor is driving along the freeway when his young son asks him, "Daddy, what does motherf____r mean?" He turns to his son, "That''s a really bad word, don''t ever say that again. Where did you learn that?!?!?" His son answers innocently, "Well, that''s what you just said about that car you said cut you off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two male flies are buzzing around, cruising for good looking female flies. One spots a real cutie sitting on a pile of horse manure and dives down toward her. "Pardon me," he says, turning on his best charm, "...but is this stool taken?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are filling up at a gas station. The first one says to the other, "I bet these awful gas prices are going even higher". The second replies, "It won''t affect me. I always buy exactly $10 worth".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pedro was driving down the street, in a panic, because he had an important meeting and couldn''t find a parking place. Looking up toward heaven, he said "Lord, take pity on me. If you find me a parking place, I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of my life and give up tequila." Miraculously, a parking place appeared. Pedro looked up again and said "Never mind. I found one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady gynecologist, was concerned that she was be being lied to everytime she took her car in to have it worked on. She knew very little about cars, so when she heard the local college was having classes in auto repair, she signed up. She studied very hard and was one of the best students. When the final exam came she took her time and did the best she could. She got the results backand she passed with a 150 percent out of 100 percent. When she got her grade she couldn''t figure it out, so she called her professor. The professor told her, "I gave you 50 percent for passing the written test, 50 percent for taking the engine apart and putting back together, and another 50 percent for doing it thru the muffler."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? life life who? A life is what you need to get!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s gross? Two vampires fighting over a bloody tampon. What''s grosser than that? Finding a used condom on the bottom of a mayonnaise jar. What''s grosser than that? When you open the refigerator and the rump rost farts in your face. You want to know what''s grosser than that? When you sit on your grandpa''s lap and he pops a boner. But the one thing that is grosser than that is when you are siting on your grandma''s lap and she pops a boner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand? Quattro Sinko.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) What do you ask a kid wearing a muscle shirt but has no muscles? A.) Did you leave your muscles in your other muscle shirt?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.)Your child poops in their pants- what do you do? A.)Drop off the child at day-care and make them change it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) What does a blond say when she comes out of a lesbian bar? A) Wow, those people sure were friendly!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife asked her husband well you remarry if I die? Husband:(caught off guard) He said no, I already did.... CRAP!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend Sam was taking electricity as one of his high school electives, originally being interested in robotics. Unfortunately, he changed his mind, but was still stuck with finishing his despised electricity books. "Do you have any idea of a direction you are going to go now?" asked my mother. He shook his head. "No idea..." That''s when my dad jumped in. "Well, even though you won''t use it in your career, now you will know what happens electrically when you push the little red button and say ''Welcome to Sheetz, Pump 5 is on.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond goes up to a brunette that''s wearing a puffy wig with two green ribbons on each front side. The blond says "NICE CAT! HOW DID YOU GET IT TO BALANCE ON YOUR HEAD?" The brunette tears up and says "ITS A WIG! MY FRIENDS TOLD ME IT WAS IN FASHION AND I GUESS THEY HATE ME!!!" The brunette runs home and never noticed that she was talking to a blond. So in the end the brunette was a blond too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma so ugly she didn''t even have to dress up for Halloween, and still scared everybody, and made some people say, "Nice costume!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she tried to kill 2 stones with one bird!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billymac: "Those there are award winnin'' cows." BubbaJr.: "What''d they do?" Billymac: "They''re outstandin'' in their field"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if..... you went weeks without food or shelter just so you could have front row seats to a Brooks-n''-Dunn concert.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If "poly" means "many" and a tic is a bloodsucking creature, than what are politicians?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog without legs? It doesn''t matter - he won''t come, anyway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond and her friends went to a bank to rob it. The blond''s job was to get the code for the vault they wanted to rob. Finally, the blond came back to the vault and began punching in numbers. Each time she typed in a number it beeped a different sound. A friend asked, "Do you know the code?" The blond said, "No, but listen." She made a whole bunch of beeps then said, "It''s the funky town music!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.)Why do kids pick their nose? A.)BECAUSE THEY ARE TOO DARN LAZY TO GET A TISSUE AND THEIR FAVORITE SHOW IS ON. EVEN THOUGH THEY''VE SEEN IT 1 HUNDRED TIMES, CAN''T MISS A SECOND TO GET A TISSUE, WHEN THEY HAVE THEIR FINGER FOR FAST AND EASY ANSWER FOR THEIR BOGERY NOSE! Q.) How do you make them stop? A.) Glue a tissue box full of tissues to their head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) What does a blond think a leprechaun is? A.) An elf. But she only sees it when it''s near the holidays and has drunk an Irish drink. Even though her parents keep telling her they aren''t real...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do people have small dogs? A: So they can carry them in their bags, and when the person farts, they can blame it on the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To all who do NOT believe in evolution, I have proof: MY spaghetti from two weeks ago has started growing arms and legs and I think it just called me, "Mommy". By the way, I, myself, do NOT believe in the theory of evolution.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re a redneck if: The only thing you swing a bat at is a mailbox.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: Your mother has ammo on her Christmas list!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: Directions to your house include ''''Turn off the paved road...''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The funniest bumper sticker is: Keep honking I''m reloading!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: You like to brag you learned to fire a shotgun before you could walk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do cats go to find their tail? The retail store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a grape say when it gets squished? Nothing, it just lets out a little whine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many employers motivate workers with bonuses. Some offer gym memberships, a few even supply day care for their working mothers and fathers. Our bosses go a step further. A sign posted in our break room read: New Incentive Plan . . . Work or get fired!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a man with three daughters. The first daughter(a Brunette) comes up and says "Daddy why''d you name me Daisy" the dad says" ''cause when you were born a daisy fell on your head." The second daughter (a red-head) comes up and says "Daddy why''d you name me Rose" the dad says "''cause when you were born a rose fell on your head." The third daughter (a blonde) comes up and says "kjaglifvgjlfj" the dad says "SHUTUP CINDERBLOCK"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be schizophrenic, but now we''re just fine', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many polititians does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 Clinton to start the screwing enitiative, Nixon to steal public tax money to campain for the support of the light bulb initiative, Jimmy Carter to bore people to death about the campain Reagan to reasure the American public that it is necesary and ok to change the light bulb Bush jr. to make a mess of the initiative........ .........and Hillary to come smack the s#%@ out of her husband for screwing around!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes, I worry about you... But then i remember that my mom told me never to anthropomorphize.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman is having a problem with her closet door, it was falling off every time a bus was passing by. So she called a repair man. The repairman comes and sees that indeed, the door falls off every time a bus passes by. "OK, I''m going to see what is going on, just close the door behind me" and he steps into the closet. Just then, the husband comes from work, opens the closet and finds the repairman. Husband: "What the hell are you doing here!" Repairman: "Well, you''re not going to believe it, but I''m waiting for a bus!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar and orders three whiskey sours, drinks them down BAM! BAM! BAM! Then he orders three more. The bartender''s having a slow night and appreciates the business, but is also concerned. "Hey buddy, slow down. What seems to be the problem?" The guy answers, "I went on a week-long business trip, and had to leave my wife alone. I''ve had my suspicions about our next-door neighbor, so I hung a weight from the bottom of the bedspring just above a bowl of cream." The bartender nods sympathetically and pours the guy another. "So you came home and found cream on the weight?" The guy downs his fourth whiskey sour and says, "It''s worse than that. The cream had turned into butter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) What kind of service has a two for one "Tuesday" special? A.) Yo mama!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy came back from school and noticed that his father was wearing his weeding ring at the wrong finger. He asked his father, "Why are you wearing your ring on the wrong hand and finger?" And the father said,"Because I married the wrong wife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why don''t blond chicks date blond guys? A: To avoid inbreeding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vini vedi velcro (I came, I saw, I stuck around)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So two farmers are standing next to a cow and one farmer says: 1st guy: "Hey Larry, you know how your birthday''s tomorrow?" 2nd guy: "Uh huh." 1st guy: "I made a cake." 2nd guy: "Uh huh." ......*long pause*...... Cow: "Hey Larry, you know how your birthday''s tomorrow?" 2nd guy:"Uh huh." Cow: "I made a pie." 2nd guy:"Uh huh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) Why do homeless people love to go to church? A.) There is always free water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Are A Redneck If: You light a match in your bathroom and it blows your house off its wheels!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lion wearing a hat? A Dandy Lion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.) Why did the dog go to court? A.) Because it got a barking ticket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is a cheerleader''s favorite drink? A: Root Beer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you ask a Bears fan what his or her two favorite teams are they would be: - The Bears - And whoever the Green Bay Packers are playing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Blondie, do swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you, god? Yes I do. ------------------------------------------------------------ Q. Mrs. Blondie did you ever stay all night with this man in California? A. I refuse to answer that question. Q. Did you ever stay all night with this man in Michigan? A. I refuse to answer that question. Q. Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami? A. No.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8 dumb headlines! Can you figure out what they are trying to say? 1. Subway Finds Dirtier Subways After Cleaning Jobs Were Cut -New York times 2. Study Finds Sex, Pregnancy Link -Cornell Daily Sun 3. Low Wages Said Key To Poverty -Newsday 4. Malls Try To Atract Shoppers- Baltimore Sun 5. Official: Only Rain Will Cure Drought -Westport Herald News 6. Teenage Girls Often Have Babies Fathered By Men- Oregonian 7. Man Shoots Neighbor With Machete 8. Free Advice: Bundle Up When Out In The Cold -Lexington Herald-Leader', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m racist because I have colored TV.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to Mexican with a high salary? Can I have ketchup on those fries?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kung Chow called his boss and said: "Hey, boss I not come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomach ache, leg hurt, I not come work." The boss says: "Kung Chow I really need you today. When I feel sick like this I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes me feel better and I can go to work. You should try that." Two hours later Kung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what you say and I feel great, I be at work soon. You got nice house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the Chinese people call their retarded son? Sum Ting Wong', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now I haven''t known you very long and I shouldn''t be asking you for this so soon, but I really need it badly. I haven''t had it for a while and I can already feel it going in good and hard and coming out nice and soft. If you would do this for me no one would ever know. I am sure you can satisfy my needs and I''d be very grateful if you would. I am very desperate and I need your help. You must think by now that I have a lot of nerve but I can feel my tongue wrapping around it and sucking out all the juices until it''s very dry. I am not going to beat around the bush any longer, so - Do you have a piece of gum?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Christian, playing an active role in his church''s activites, backslided and started leading a wayward life. He was usually drunk most of the time and on one occasion, as he was staggering back home after leaving a beer parlor, he fell into a gutter. He staggered back up, put one leg inside the gutter and kept going like that until his pastor saw him. "What are you doing brother?" the pastor asked while pulling him out of the gutter. The drunk then started shouting, "I am healed, I am healed, praise the Lord." The embarrassed pastor then said, "I only pulled you out of the gutter," The drunk then stuttered, "Lord of Mercy, I thought I had been crippled by God."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless! P.S. This works for just about any instrument player.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers? WELL HUNG', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) What do you call an ant from overseas? A) Important', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cannibal went to a brain store one day because he was craving brains. he decided he wanted to try a musician''s brains to see if they taste any different. He looked around and saw the prices. Trumpet Brains-$25.00/pound Trombone Brains-$1.00/pound Percussion Brains- 10.00/pound Tuba Brains-$0.50/pound Colorguard Brains-$0.25/pound Clairinet Brains-$1000.00/pound Flute Brains-$0.50/pound So the cannibal turned and saw a man that worked there. He said to the guy: "Why are the clarinet brains so expensive?" The man replied "DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY CLAIRINET PLAYERS YOU HAVE TO KILL TO GET ONE POUND OF BRAINS?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Kermit the Frog''s middle name? The.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so poor, she cleans her shoes with a pencil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wow, said Joan after she saw that her friend got glasses. "You like my new glasses?", asked Peter. "Yep. They make you look really smart.", replied Joan. "I know. That''s what my mom said. That''s why I wear them in math class."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat, that when she finally lost her spare tire, she still had an 18 wheeler to go!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the popsicle say to the lollypop as he was leaving? So long, sucker!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the lollipop say to the popsicle? ''Cool, dude!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey! Is that your head or did your neck blow a bubble?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the turkey cross the road? A: Because the chicken had the day off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: Your shotgun is named after your girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you have the same number of teeth as you have fingers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever killed someone over a "kick me" sign.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever searched for gold in your grandpa''s chest and had your fingers taken off by the booby trap within.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you won money of your dead grandpa by playing poker with him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever had to towel dry after a fart.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you have a glass eye collection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: Your pet groundhog has ever bitten more than one of your thumbs off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: one wall of your home is a tarp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was a little boy, I was considered clever for my age. When you were a little boy, you must have eaten paint chips.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies? A) 25! One to mix the batter and 24 to peel the m&m''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought some powdered water but I don''t know what to add to it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a dog the other day. I named him Stay. It''s fun to call him. "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell when you''re out of invisible ink?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier. I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Droughts happen because God didn''t pay his water bill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Change is inevitable... except from vending machines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ahhhh... "Mike! What''s wrong?" "I-I had a nightmare." "What was the nightmare?" "I-I-" "Yes?" "I-I-" "Spit it out!" "I-I went to heaven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve shaved off your eyebrows and taped them to a little kid''s back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: You''ve ever bought steel-toed boots, only to remove the steel to patch a hole in your trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever had a family feud over a litter of coondogs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you use a handful of creek mud as birth control.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know how old hags tell time? * ** *** **** ***** ****** ******* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** ** * ** *** **** ***** ****** ******* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** ** * ** *** **** ***** ****** ******* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** ** * ** *** **** ***** ****** ******* ******** ******* ****** ***** **** *** ** * A witch-watch!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The problem with keeping an open mind is that all my ideas tend to fall out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever held a lifelong grudge over a spelling bee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(This is from my friend, Mitchell. It was very funny at first when we first heard him say it at lunch, and I figured I would share it.) Yo Momma''s so fat, she ate a grenade and the explosion didn''t even make it out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever gotten a headache reading the newspaper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: you''ve ever dislodged a sunflower seed from the corner of your eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a little boy came up to a man at the park. The boy asked the man, "Why do you have a big nose?" The man answered, "Because...I have big fingers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat , She uses a pillow for a tampon. ------------------------------------ Yo momma is so stupid , That when her boyfriend said, "Lets do it doggie-style tonight," she sat down and licked her ass. ------------------------------------- Yo momma is so dumb , That she was arrested for taking a dump at a construction site next to a sign that read, "Dump waste here." ------------------------------------- Yo momma is so fat , That when she farted, your dad ran away yelling, "It''s a tornado. Hide!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My goal is to find a soulmate. It''s not cheating, just multi-tasking.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which sweet is very clever? A Smartie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the hand cross the road? A: To get to the second-hand shop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Toby. Toby who? Toby or not toby that is the question!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q) What is: Black White Black White Black White? A) A nun rolling down a hill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been following the ongoing Evolution vs Intelligent Design controversy, and as a card-carrying botanist, I''m a very strong supporter of Darwin. But still, there are things in life that rational science simply cannot explain. Like Paris Hilton...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many acountants does it take to change a lightbulb? A. 1 at a fixed rate of 3.5% income return after purchase for every bulb replaced over a 6 year plan, with projected inflation expected to rise to over $1.25 per bulb in 2006.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s arms are so short that she has to tilt her head to scratch her ears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THIS JOKE IS NOT MEANT TO OFFEND ANYBODY There''s this guy Joe who has a parrot that he adores. Well, Joe has to go on a trip and doesn''t know what to do about his parrot. Three of his buddies, who live together, offer to take him in. The three guys are Norwegian, Swiss, and African-American. Joe completely trusts these guys so he leaves his parrot with them for the week. When Joe comes back he find his bird all bandaged up. He has a broken wing, a fractured leg, and bruises all over. He asks his parrot, "Well, what happened?" The parrot replies "I kind of got beat up" Joe asks, "Was it the Norwegian?" The parrot says, "No, he was very nice." Joe again asks, "Well, was it the Swiss?" The parrot replies,"Nope, not at all." Joe say "So it was the " The parrot cuts him off, says, "We don''t use that word any more."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One beautiful morning, a husband and wife decided to go for a drive in the country. Unfortunately, no matter which road they took, they kept seeing dead possums lying on the shoulder. After several miles of this, the husband turned to his wife and said, "Now I think I know the answer to the age-old question ''Why did the chicken cross the road?''" "What is it?" she asked. "Well," he replied, "it was to prove to the possums that it could be done."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Accordion. Accordion who? Accordion to the t.v., it''s going to be cold out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You should have no doubt in your mind that you are in a redneck family..... When your uncle drunkenly approaches you, slaps you on the back, grabs your face and murmurs "Heaeh kiiiiiiid, I think it''s a good thing I used a condum. And walks off slowy, mumbling. "Cause your mamoo gets realy piiist when she''s pregnant........" And in disbelief, you look around to find your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so ugly, that they pushed her face into cookie dough to make gorilla cookies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When everything''s coming up roses, it''s time to celebrate. But, when everything''s coming up daisies, it''s time to mourn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s father says to him, "When you go back to your Mom''s tonight, give her this envelope. Tell her that since you are now 18 this is the LAST check she''ll ever see from me for child support. Then, stand back and watch the expression her face." "OK" replied Little Johnny. Later when Little Johnny got home he said to his mom, "Mom, Dad asked me to give you this envelope. He said to tell you that since I''m now 18 this is the LAST child support payment he''ll ever have to make to you. Now I''m supposed to stand back and watch the expression on your face." "Next time you visit your father tell him that after 18 years I have decided to inform him that he''s not your father. Then, stand back and watch the expression on HIS face." replied Little Johnny''s mother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long does it take a blond to change a lightbulb? They never change it, by the time they''ve realized that it''s broken, the world would of ended.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A middle-aged guy is out to dinner with his wife to celebrate her fortieth birthday. He says, "So what would you like, Julie? A Jaguar? A sable coat? A diamond necklace?" She says, "Bernie, I want a divorce." "My goodness," he says, "I wasn''t planning on spending that much."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The voluptuous blonde entered the dentist''s office in an obvious state of agitation. She sat down in the chair and fidgeted nervously as the dentist prepared his utensils. "Oh, doctor," she exclaimed, as he prepared to look into her mouth. "I''m so afraid of dentists. Why, I think I''d rather have a baby than have a tooth drilled." "Well, miss," said the dentist impatiently, "better make up your mind before I adjust the chair."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The blonde teenage girl had long been infatuated with a popular local disc jockey and finally got to meet him when the station held an open house. When she seductively suggested they get better acquainted, he took her into a vacant studio and unzipped his pants. "I suppose you know what this is?" he whispered. "I sure do," she said, grasping it in her hand and putting it near her mouth, "I''d like to say hello to Ricky, Bobby, Tina and the whole gang down at Danny''s Pizzeria."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always follow my first instinct, That is unless I second guess myself. --------------------------------------------- Why don''t you have a drink, your only driving to a funeral right? --------------------------------------------- Why buy a watch from the competitor, I thought time was against us? ---------------------------------------------- You must be smart, because you just confused us all. ----------------------------------------------', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock,knock.... Who''s there? Fortification. Fortification who? Fortification, we''re going to Miami. --------------------------------------------- Knock,knock.... Who''s there? Carl. Carl who? Carl get you there faster than a bike. -----------------------------------------------', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While on a game show, Justins had to identify a number of sounds. When she heard this: *laughter then plop, plop, plop* she identified it correctly right away. What did she say? An audience laughing it''s head off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t vegetarian women scream during orgasms? They refuse to admit that a piece of meat gives them pleasure!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a man is in a forest, talking to himself, with no women around, is he still wrong? If a woman is in a forest, talking to herself, with no man around, is she still complaining? -------------------------------------------------------- Did you know that the shortest sentence in the English language is "I am"? Did you know that the longest sentence is "I do"? -------------------------------------------------------- Sex is hereditary. If your parents didn''t have it, chances are that you won''t either.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Italian Mafia Don is dying, so he calls his grandson to his bed. "Grandson, I wanna you lissin to me. I wanna you for you to take my chrome plated 38 revolver so you will always remember me." "But grandpa, I really don''t like guns, ... how about leaving me your Rolex watch instead." "You lissin to me. Somma day you gonna be runna da bussiness, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big home and maybe a couple of bambina. Am I right?" "Yes grandpa, I guess so." "Ok, so soma day you gonna come home and maybe finda you wife in bed with anotha man. Whada you gonna do? Pointa to da watch and say, ... TIMES UP!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might just be a redneck if your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a blonde and a screendoor have in common? The harder you bang them the looser they get. Why did the blonde climb the glass wall? To see what was on the other side. What is the first thing a blonde does in the morning? Get dressed and go home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nicholaas (toe 4) het by sy ouma gaan kuier, en ouma het dit goed gedink om hom bietjie groentes te leer eet wat sy ma nie graag gaar maak nie. Die spesifieke dag is broccoli aan die beurt, en ouma versin die oulikste stories oor die boompies wat hy gaan proe. Hy begin ewe entosiasties aan die eerste een eet, maar ouma sien hy kou al stadiger en kry so veraf trek in sy ogies. "Ouma," roep hy toe sy ouma wat intussen in die spens verdwyn het, "kom kyk hier!" Die mannetjie beduie toe na sy bord waar hy die laaste "boompie" staan gemaak het, mooi vasgedruk in die middel van die rys. "Kyk net, hierdie is die Paradys, en daardie boom is die boom waarvan God ges het ons mag nie eet nie!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blond have blisters on her lips? From trying to blow out lightbulbs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a blond busy? Write "please turn over" on both sides of a paper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One blond to another: "The electicity break down was terrible. I was stuck in the lift for 2 hours." The other blond: "That''s nothing, I stood on the elevator for 6 hours!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wat is die toppunt van geraas? 2 geraamtes wat woellig spyker op n sinkdak met n coke blikkie as n kondoom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pappa : jy moet nou soet wees, ek gan jou tottie afkap. Seuntjie : kan ma afkap, want sussie sin is klaar af en omgedop en dit lyk BEFOK!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prostitute shouting accross the street - "Hey, black boy! You want a blow job?" He shouts back "Fuck off! I don''t want ANY job!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a kid asks where rain comes from, I tell him, "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, I tell him, "Probably because of something you did."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old, she still owes Moses a dollar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: You''ve ever carved a gunstock out of a bedpost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college student at a recent college football game challenged a senior citizen sitting next to him, saying it was impossible for their generation to understand this: "You grew up in a different world," the student said, loud enough for the whole crowd to hear. "Today we have television, jet planes, space travel, man has walked on the Moon, our spaceships have visited Mars, we even have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing ... and uh ....." Taking advantage of a pause in the student''s litany, the senior citizen said, "You''re right. We didn''t have those things when we were young; so we invented them, you little twit! What are *you* doing for the next generation???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock. Who''s there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes me, who''s you? (This is me, who''s you.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is illegal to stick coins in your ears in the state of Hawaii.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why were the police at the baseball game? Because someone stole second base!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat and dumb, she used Antarctica as a popsicle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mommo so stupid when she was drowning, she ate a Lifesaver. Lifesaver is a candy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('100,000 Sperm And You Were The Fastest?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Famous last words: "Ok, I''m only going to have one..." -- Said the polygamist right after marrying his first wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, whenever she turns around--there goes another city. Yo momma is so fat, whenever she sits down she lowers all the prices at wal-mart. Yo momma is so fat, whenever she turns around it''s your birthday. Yo momma is so fat, NASA engineers mistook her for a new planet. Yo momma is so fat, it takes 1000 years to design clothes for her Yo momma is so fat, whenever she gets weighed she breaks the scale. You''re so fat, I wonder if it''s because of yo momma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your dad bought you a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for Christmas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, I told her Christmas was right around the corner - so she went looking for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a bus; she''s big, doesn''t smell very good, and it''s only a dollar a ride.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a species will be extinct.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so stupid, she bought a video tape on how to fix your VCR!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so poor, she has to chase down the garbage truck with a shopping list!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so old --- she knew Burger King when he was a prince! yo momma is so poor --- I saw her banging on the dumpster and I asked her what she was doing and she said "My kids locked me out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Best Friend to Former Fat Guy: Hey man, you''re looking good. Looks like you lost lots of pounds. Any secrets? Former Fat Guy: Eating dates. Best Friend: Oh yeah? I''ve read that compared to other foods, dates have the highest anti-oxidant values. How much and how many times a week do you eat dates? Former Fat Guy: Oh just one date every week-end. I eat first before I fuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call when god takes a crap? Holy shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man from Peking and a first generation Chinese American woman get married. On the wedding night he climbs into bed next to her and tries to be reassuring, saying, "My darling, I know this is your first time and you must be frightened." She says that is true but she will do anything he wants. The groom says "Let''s start with 69." And she says, "You want broccoli with beef?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows were in a field grazing. First cow says, "MOO." Second cow says, "You asshole, I was gonna say that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yankee Doodle went to town A-riding on his mother Every time he hit a bump He had another brother!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his girlfriend are having a sexual encounter. He asks her to "go downtown" so, with a sigh, she gets on her knees in front of him and starts peering at his genitals, looking and tipping her head this way and that, studying the whole business. After about five minutes of this, he asked her in a sort of peeved voice, "Well, just what are you doing?" She replies, "I''m doing what I always do when I''m downtown with no money!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 2 nuns and 3 prostitutes on a football field? 2 Tight Ends and 3 Wide Receivers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, Knock Who''s there? Ya Ya - who? I didn''t know you could yodel! Yahoooo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly that when you entered an ugly contest, out of 10,000 people, you won first place!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re like a Wendy''s. The drive through is open till 1am or later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good friend will say: "I love you!" (In a sarcastic tone) A best friend will say: "I love you, you f***in'' b****!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the little black boy get for his birthday? Your bike.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does it take 3 women with PMS to change a lightbulb? BECAUSE IT JUST DOES, OK!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TOP GEORGE BUSH SLOGANS 1. I''ll turn capital punishment into a new game show! 2. I promise to get cocaine off our streets: 1 kilo at a time. 3. I''ll finish what Bill started -- the interns. 4. Like father, like son. You liked my dad, right? 5. Vote for the GOP, Not OPP. 6. I promise no sex scandal: just look at me. 7. New penal plan: I won''t use mine! 8. Read my lips: Al Gore Sucks. 9. George W. Bush: No hang-ups. Just hangovers 10. Vote for Bush and against Common Sense', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat she stood on a talking scale and it said, "1,2,3 GET THE HELL OFF OF ME!!!!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Me Me who? Who the hell is me-who???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the most racist animal in the world? A parrot bacause Polly wants a cracker not a nigger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call 50 black guys in a hole? A: Afro-Turf', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a little boy came over to his friends house and said, "Ah shit! I got gunk on my shoe!" As he was saying it, the friend''s dad came over to the little boy and said, "How dare you say that in front of my child!" The dad sent the little boy home and called his father, telling him to come over to his house and talk to him. The father came over and said, "So what if my boy said that? it''s not like your kids haven''t overheard you say a curse word!" "Actually they haven''t!" claimed the disgruntled father. As they argue, the disgruntled father''s baby in the backround blurts out, "Fuck you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly, you scare blind children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly when you were born your parents named you "Shit Happens"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly instead of taking you to the doctor your mom took you to the vet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prior to her trip to Texas, Buffy (a New Yorker) confided to her sorority sisters she had three goals for her trip to the Lone Star State. She wanted to taste some real Texas Barbeque, take in a bona fide rodeo and have sex with a real cowboy. Upon her return, her sorority sisters were curious as to how she fared. "Let me tell you, they have a tree down there called a Mesquite and when they slow cook that brisket over that Mesquite, it''s oh so good. The taste is unbelievable!" And, I went to a real rodeo... Talk about athletes! Those guys wrestle full-grown bulls! They ride horses at a full gallop then jump off the horses and grab the bulls by the horns and throw them to the ground! It is just incredible!" They then asked, "Well tell us, did you have sex with a real cowboy?" "Are you kidding? Once I saw the outline of the condom they carry in the back pocket of their jeans, I changed my mind!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile, Robin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t a gypsy man walk right? Because he has crystal balls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('>God made mud,<<<< >>God made dirt,<<<< >>>God made guys,<< >>>>So girls can flirt!<', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you''re stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, the bitch caused an eclipse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there Icee Icee who I see you in there now let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asked his mother what the word "shit" meant. The mother didn''t know what to say, so she said it meant "food". Then he asked what the word "nigger" meant. She still did not know what to say, so she said "priest". The last word he asked about was "fuck". She really did not know what to say so she said "to get dressed". When the priest came over, the boy said to the priest, "Hey, nigger, the shit is on the table and my mom and dad are fucking in the room".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ronnie never listens in science class because he says it''s boring.. One day his teacher asked, "Ronnie, What are the 3 states of matter?" Since he heard his name he did listen to the question. So he thinks for a second and replies, "Texas, Florida, and Arkansas!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 24999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aoccdrnig to rscheearch codnutced at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy,it deosn''t mttaer waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are tpyed,the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit oedrer. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey ltteer by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You so ugly, you make President Bush look hot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s green, fuzzy, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree, can kill you? A: A pool table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so ghetto, her wedding cake was made out of cornbread.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) You''re so poor that when somebody rings the doorbell you have to stick your head out the window and yell, "Ding-Dong!" 2) You''re so poor that when I asked if I could use the bathroom at your house your mom gave me two sticks, one to hold the ceiling up and one to fight the cockroaches. 3) You''re so poor that your house is 5 square yards, one floor and no walls. 4) You''re so poor that your house is very dark because you can''t afford a light bulb. 5) You''re so poor that you live in an out-house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he felt crumby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Zero: For all blondes know, the lightbulb is still burning bright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She points him to the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter. She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?" He answers, " You see, it''s like this. Yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes. She came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers saying, ''It''s sooo much cheaper!'' So, I figure if I have to roll my own. So does she."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A: A quarter pounder with cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice. Weight Watchers will meet at 7PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double door at the side entrance. Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for tests. Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan who are preparing for the birth of their first child. The Lutheran Men''s group will meet at 6PM. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread, and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the scientist install a door knocker on his door and not a door bell? A: He wanted to win the No-Bell (Nobel) prize!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a blonde who goes to a pizza parlor. When she orders, she asks for her pizza to be cut up into 6 slices instead of eight. Why? A: She''s not hungry enough to eat eight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Wet. Wet who? Wet me in! It''s waining!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Did you hear the story about the peacock? A: It''s a beautiful tail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did George Washington sleep standing up? A: He couldn''t lie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two turds were sitting beside each other in a toilet, when one looks to the other and says, "man, you smell like shit".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a rabbit and a cow? A: One''s a rabbit and one is a cow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why DIDN`T the skull cross the road? A: Because he didn`t have the guts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the frog cross the road? A: He was tied onto the chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so ugly, that when she met the ugliest man on Earth, he shrieked in terror and jumped out the window.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fish + alien transpotation = Unidentified Frying Object', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What goes, "KCAUQ, KCAUQ"? A: A duck flying backwards!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BOB: Have you changed the water in the fish bowl yet? MARGE: No, it hasn''t drunk the water I gave it a week ago.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe in evolution and if you don''t I will let you meet my relatives.... Then you''ll believe me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love you is eight letters, but so is "bull shit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I decided to kill the sexiest person alive, but then I realized suicide is illegal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I often dream of the day when my car will be able to drive me home after a long hard day of work. That''s about the time the driver next to me abruptly blows his horn telling me to wake up and get back into my own lane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about the blond Think Tank? Once they got it got started, it drove through three houses and a convienence store before they figured out how to stop it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('East to the Sea, West to the Land, Death to the B***h that touches my Man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mario, I am in so much pain right now I can barely sit. Leave the mushrooms for the adventures and out of the bedroom. "Fine Princess. Yoshi, let''s go." "No, no...Yoshi can stay."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q-If the big breasted women work at Hooters, where does the one legged woman work? A-Ihop', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old she got an autographed copy of the bible.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My T.V. has more channels then your IQ, and I DON''T EVEN HAVE CABLE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she sat on a rainbow skittles popped out! Yo momma so fat she tripped broke her leg and gravy poured out! Yo mommas so stupid when I said it was chilly out she grabbed a spoon and ran out! Yo momma so fat she IS the family reunion! Yo momma so skinny she hula hoops with cheerios! Yo momma so flat she jealous of the wall! Yo momma so fat when you get on top her your ears pop! Yo momma so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dog to play with her! Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry! Yo momma so ugly rice krispies wont talk to her! har-de-har har old school jokes for you old school insulters...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some old school insults for yall... You depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. So dumb you couldnt hold water in a bucket. Happiness: seeing your picture on a milk carton. Your mouth rarely makes calls to the brain. Missing a layer of insulation in your attic. You''re so fat, when you turn around people throw you a welcome back party. You''re so fat, you have to put a belt on with a boomerang. You''re so slow, you have to speed up to stop. You''re so fat, when you go to the zoo elephants throw peanuts at you. The eyes are open, the mouth moves, but Mr. Brain has long since departed. The cheese slid off his cracker. Alright, I''m gonna save the rest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor doctor! I feel like a pack of cards! "I''ll deal with you later!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you help a starving cannibal? A: Give him a hand!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day in the 1800''s a father asked his child to go get some nuts and berries. She went around and got nuts and berries from every boy she knew. When she showed her dad he said, "That''s not what I meant!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Did you hear the joke about the jump rope? A: No, I skipped it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I shake your head, all I hear is echo echo echo...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your face is sad. Not that you''re crying, it''s that I feel sorry for you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly that your momma cried when she saw you after birth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly that when it''s Christmas, instead of giving you toys, Santa gives you plastic bags to cover your face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you keep an idiot busy? A. Tell him that the ground is going to fall on him if he doesn''t get off it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so stupid, she walked into an antique shop and asked "What''s New?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so dumb she dj''s for the ice cream truck!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she leaves stretch marks in the bath tub.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How women think about sex: At 8, ignore it. At 18, experience it. At 28, look for it. At 38, ask for it. At 48, beg for it. At 58, pay for it. At 68, pray for it. At 78, forget it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid says to mom:"The babysitter''s an angel! She was naked in the garden and screamed God I''m coming! Lucky daddy was holding her from behind to keep her here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the new name for a taxi in Oshakati? A computer. Why? It has windows, always crashes, & is driven by a thin black floppy with a virus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The cat was chasing the rooster around on the farm, then the cat fell in the water and the rooster laughed. Lesson: For every wet pussy there is a happy cock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman tells man: :"I demand good manners in bed just like at the dinner table." So man gets into bed slowly, smiles & says: "Honey, would u please pass me the vagina?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good: You & Your wife decide not to have kids. Bad: Your wife can''t find the birth control pills Ugly: You daughter borrowed them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Japanese girl accidentally lets out a disturbing fart after making love! She said: "Aww, so sorry. Excuse please, front hole so happy, back hole laugh out loud!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the cannibal who was late to dinner? He got the cold shoulder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a cop stops you he gives you a ticket,when a cop stops me he gives me his number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so ugly you make Bin Landen look like a god.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom: I''ve got a great knock-knock joke. Bill: Ok, let''s hear it. Tom: You start. Bill: Knock-knock. Tom: Who''s there? Bill: ???????????? (dumbfounded)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After enlisting in the 82nd Airborne Division, I eagerly asked my Recruiter what I could expect from jump school. "Well," he said, "it''s three weeks long." "What else," I asked. "The first week they separate the men from the boys," he said. "The second week, they separate the men from the fools." "And the third week?" I asked. "The third week, the fools jump."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The perfect man and the perfect woman got married, had a perfect honeymoon, and got a perfect car. One day, they were driving along and Santa Claus was on the side of the road. His sleigh had broken down, and he needed a ride to the next town. The perfect couple were nice, and let him hitch a ride. Well, they were driving along when they crashed into a tree. Only one of them lived. Who? The perfect woman. Why? There is no such thing as Santa Claus, and God knows that there isn''t any such thing as a perfect man! ;)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gentleman walks into bar, and to his horror, sees a screaming naked lady tied to the wall while the bartender licks her! The guy runs out and calles the police.He is even more horrified when the police say there is nothing they can do; the bartender has lick-her (liquor) license.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Known fact amongst all men: Having sex can help combat asthma and hay fever, now we need to inform all women!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your teeth are so yellow the sun should be shy to show it self!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With a lousy year under his belt a tractor salesman was traveling down a dusty back road in Iowa, when he came across a farmer working his field with an old, broken down tractor. He jumped out of his truck and gave his best sales pitch to the old guy. The farmer stroked his chin and said, "The other day I was getting ready to milk Betsy. I was just getting started when she kicked me with her left leg. So I grabbed me a piece of rope and tied her leg to the stall. Just as I was starting again, she kicked me with her right leg. I grabbed another piece of rope and tied leg to the other side of the stall. I''ll be darned if when I started again she smacked in the face with her tail. I grabbed another piece of rope and tied her tail to the rafter above. Mister, if you can convince my wife that I was just trying to milk that cow, I''ll buy a tractor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someday your prince charming will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No one dies a virgin, life screws us all!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. -Poor Bear', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heaven won''t take me and hell''s afraid I''ll take over. -Unknown (boardofwisdom.com)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the bee say to the naughty bee? Bee-Hive your self', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a guy asked a blond to take a survey, she asked, "Do I have to bring it back?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MEXICAN VIRUS BUENOS DIAS!! JOU HAVE YUST RECEIVED A MEHICAN BIRUS!!! SINCE WE NOT SO TECHNOLOGICALLY ADBANCED IN MEHICO, DIS IS A MANUAL BIRUS. PLEASE DELETE ALL THE FILES ON JOUR HARD DRIVE JOURSELF AND SEND THIS E-MAIL TO EBERYONE JOU KNOW. TAN JOU POR YELPING ME. JULIO MANUEL JOSE FEDENZIO RODRIGUEZ GARCIA , MEXICAN HACKER', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up two prostitutes and >>take >>them to their separate hotel >>rooms. >> >>The first dwarf, however, is unable to get an erection. His >>depression >>is made worse by the fact that, >>from the next room, he hears his little friend shouting out cries >>of >>"Here I come again ... ONE, TWO, >>THREE... UUH!" all night long. >> >>In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, "How did it go?" >>The first mutters, "It was so embarrassing. I simply couldn''t get >>an >>erection." >> >>The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that''s embarrassing? >> >>"I couldn''t even get on the bed.."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are hanging from a pole to see who can hang the longest. The blonde is showing off by hanging from one hand. The brunette says, "I bet you can''t do no hands." The blonde takes the challenge and loses the contest.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have learned to not jump out the window with a towel as a parachute. ..never throw a boomerang if you don''t know how to catch it. ..don''t fly a kite while facing towards the wind. ..don''t throw a cat on a dog. ..never leave a three year old alone with duct tape and glue ..don''t let a friend make you laugh while eating unless he/she knows the heimlich maneuver. ..don''t ditch school if you don''t know the way back home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do mice say when they see the moon?? A: "Ooh, Cheese!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While driving to work, I found myself behind an old Ford Falcon, with five teenage boys inside. The best part was the bumper sticker in the center of the rear window. It read: DON''T LAUGH, YOUR DAUGHTER COULD BE IN HERE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I never engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed appoint', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I worked in the tourist industry in Florida, we got to wear some of the buttons that were for sale. My favorite read : We love serving tourists; I like mine well done!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I almost got fired for telling this joke at work: Do you know why fireman have bigger balls than policeman? They sell more tickets!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An architect, an artist and an accountant were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there. The accountant said, "I like both." "Both?" The accountant replied "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the office and get some work done."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the accountant, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was watching my friend instant message. She was talking to a kid that she knew. The kid had lost his hat. I suggested, rather foolishly, to look in his nose. (As a joke, of course) My friend typed this. He then wrote (without seeing the message that my friend wrote) I''m going to look there on Monday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do we look at a calendar to find what date it is, when we don''t know the date?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a duck walked into a drugstore and bought some lipstick. She walked up to the clerk and said, "Put it on my bill!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How is it we look in a dictionary to figure out how to spell something if we don''t know how to spell it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Oscar Oscar who? Ask her a silly question, get a silly answer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb, She invented water proof tea bags.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An ejector seat on a helicopter. A fly screen on a submarine. An ashtray for a motorcycle. A lead balloon. A bikini for Eskimos. Sugar-cube fishing bait. A glass baseball bat..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1.Doctor, Doctor! My son swallowed a pen, what should I do? Use a pencil instead! 2.Doctor, Doctor! I think I''m getting shorter! You''ll just have to be a little patient. 3.Doctor, Doctor! I''m invisible! I''m sorry, sir, I can''t see you right now.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Send him to the store for tampons, telling him to ask which is the best brand. 2. When he tells you he loves you say, "I do, wait, I don''t love you!" 3. Tell him you''re a covicted serial killer everytime he asks you how are you. 4. Spill his favorite and most expensive cologne down the toilet and tell him he made me do it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a little boy and his father were having a conversation. The father asked the boy, "Can you say your ABC''s, son?" "Yes I can! A...B..C..." and he goes through the whole alphebet. The father then said, "That''s good, but can you say it backwords?" The boy smiles and says, "yeah", so he turns around and says, "A...B...C..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man called the computer company because he was having trouble with his computer. A woman answered the phone. "Hello. May I help you? "Yes. I''m having trouble with my computer. Every time I press the enter key my computer goes biserk." "I think I know what you should do." "Really?" "Yes." "What should I do?" "You should stop pressing the enter key."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s like 7-11... Cause she is open all day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went to the hospital with a sprained ankle. The doctor said, "Don''t worry, you''ll be walking in no time." He was. The doctor stole his car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick and Jane were arguing over the breakfast table. "Oh you''re so stupid!" shouted Dick. "Dick!" said their father, "That is enough! Now say you''re sorry!" "Okay," said Dick, "I am sorry you''re stupid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The King sent for his wise men all To find a rhyme for W. When they had thought for a time, But could not think of a single rhyme, "I''m sorry," he said," To trouble you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Taking advantage of a balmy day in New York, a priest and three other men of the cloth swapped their clerical garb for polos and khakis and time out on the golf course. After several really horrible shots, their caddy asked, "You guys wouldn''t be priests by any chance?" "Actually, yes, we are," one cleric replied. "How did you know?" "Easy," said the caddy, "I''ve never seen such bad golf and such clean language!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('knock-knock who''s there? duck duck who? duck I just threw a frisby at you!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who digs? Doug! A man who doesn''t dig? Douglas! A woman with a cat on her head? Kitty!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so old, she was stood up by King Tut, before he became a mummy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s a sunny morning in a big forest and the Bear family is just waking up. Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty! "Who''s been eating my porridge?" he squeaks. Daddy Bear arrives at the table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl. It is also empty! "Who''s been eating my porridge?" he roars. Mommy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch and screams, "For gosh sakes, how many times do we have to go through this crap? I haven''t made the porridge yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An application was for employment A program was a TV show A cursor used profanity And a keyboard was on a piano! Memory was something that you lost with age And a CD was a bank account And if you had a corrupted disk It would hurt when you found out! Compress was what you did to garbage Not something you did to a file And if you unzipped anything in public You''d be in jail for a while! Log on was adding wood to a fire A hard drive was a trip on the road A mouse pad was where a mouse lived And a backup happened to the commode! Cutting, you did with a pocket knife, Pasting, you did with glue. The Web was where a spider lived And a virus was the flu!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael Jordan made over $300,000 a game. That equals $10,000 a minute, at an average of 30 minutes per game. With $40 million in endorsements, he made $178,100 a day, working or not. If he sleeps 7 hours a night, he makes $52,000 every night while visions of sugarplums dance in his head. If he goes to see a movie, it will cost him $7.00, but he''ll make $18,550 while he''s there. If he wanted to save up for a new Acura NSX ($90,000), it would take him a whole 12 hours. He''ll probably pay around $200 for a nice round of golf, but will be reimbursed $33,390 for that round. If you were given a penny for every 10 dollars he made, you''d be living comfortably at $65,000 a year. In his last year, he made more than twice as much as all U.S. past presidents for all of their terms combined. However, if Jordan saves 100% of his income for the next 250 years, he''ll still have less than Bill Gates has today.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child 1: Whatcha gonna do? Child 2: I''m gonna watch TV! Child 1: Guess what? I''m the QUEEN of the TV Freaks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone can be an Echo! 1] Repeat everything a person says & does in an exaggerated way 2] If your victim tries to get you to stop by saying something like, ''I''m a stupid furball,'' say '' at least you have the courage to admit it!'' 3]This is the most important instruction! DO NOT LET YOUR VICTIM NEAR A BOOK!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat that she uses all of Mexico as a tanning bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she needs to lose weight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) That''s not right - Sum Ting Wrong 2) Who are you with? - Hu Yu Hai Ding 3) See me ASAP - Kum Hai Nao 4) Stupid Man - Dum Gai 5) Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni 6) Did you go to the beach? - Wai Yu So Tan 7) I bumped into a coffee table - Ai Band Mai Ni 8) It''s very dark in here - Wai So Dim 9) I thought you were on a diet - Wai Yu Mun Ching 10) This is a tow away zone - No Pah Ding 11) Our meeting is next week - Wai Yu Kum Nao 12) Staying out of sight - Lai Ying Lo 13) He''s cleaning his automobile - Wa Shing Ka', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can hear mimes. You begin to talk to yourself, then disagree about the subject, get into a nasty row over it, lose, and refuse to speak to yourself for the rest of the night. The Sun is too loud. Teddy bears begin to bully you for milk and cookies. You ask the drive-thru attendant if you can get your order to go. You can skip without a rope. Trees start chasing you. Know Someone Who''s Stressed Out... Or You Just Want To Make Laugh? Pass This Forward Along Today!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Message from www.dating.com: Your dating ad has been on the net for 8 weeks without any answer! Do you rather want us to try one week without a picture?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn''t have signed up in the first place! When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk." Wouldn''t it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press ''Ctrl Alt Delete'' and start all over? Stress is when you wake up screaming and then you realize you haven''t fallen asleep yet. My husband says I never listen to him. At least I think that''s what he said. Just remember...if the world didn''t ****, we''d all fall off. If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor! Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever. But Most Of All, Remember ! A Friend Is Like A Good Bra. Hard to Find, Supportive, Comfortable, And Always Close To Your Heart!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two contracters were building a house. While they were sawing a board, the saw slipped and cut of one of the contracter''s ears off. They were looking through the sawdust and one contracter came up with the ear. He asked his co-worker, "Is this it?" The other one said "No, mine had a pencil behind it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: "It must be tough spending all day with your hands in someone''s mouth." Dentist: "I just think of it as having my hands in their wallet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you keep a cheepskate busy? A: Put him or her in a round room and tell them that you droped a $20 bill in the corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Tommy was sitting in class, the teacher came over and told him to go out in the hallway. He got mad and he didn''t move. Five minutes later, she came back over to him and tapped him on the shoulder. "I thought I told you to go out in the hallway." "I did," He told her lying through his teeth. "Ok then, so what did you do with your gifts?" she asked. "What gifts?" "Your mom was outside in the hallway holding some gifts for you for your birthday, did you not see her or were you lying to me?" So he ran outside the class but his mom was gone. He was very upset but as he was walking back into the class, the teacher said, "Gotcha, that will teach you to disobey me and lie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two guys walking down the street when they stumble upon a drunk. They walked up to him and the 1st guy said, "Sir, what is you name?" "My name is Jesus Christ!" slurred the drunk. "That can''t possibly be, what is your real name?" asked the 2nd man. The drunk repeated, "I told you my name is Jesus Christ!" The two men still didn''t believe him so the drunk told them to follow him as he walked into a nearby bar. It was then they heard the bartender say, "Jesus Christ, are you here again?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t need to write a joke! Whenever I see your face I start to laugh anyway!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the boy sprinkle sugar underneath his pillow that night? He wanted to have sweet dreams.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are llamas big and brown? Beacause if they were small & grey, they would be mice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is black & white an red all over? A penguin holding its breath!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What to a blonde is long and hard? 4th Grade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) How does a blonde kill a fish? She drowns it! 2) How does a blonde kill a bird? She throws it off a cliff! 3) How does a blonde lose 5 pounds? She takes off her make up! 4) Why does a blonde wash her hair in the sink? Because thats where you wash vegetables! 5) What did the blonde think of her new computer? She couldn''t get channel 9!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) Did you hear about the blond skydiver? She Missed! 2) What do you call a blonde holding a balloon? Twins! 3) Why doesn''t a blonde drive a BMW? Because she can''t spell it! 4) How is a blonde the same as a bottle? Thier both empty from the neck up! 5) Did you hear about the blonde that shot an arrow into the air? She missed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: John, why is your cat at school today? John: (crying)..I heard the milkman tell mom.."When the kid goes to school i''m gonna eat your pussy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What is brown and sticky? Answer: A stick! Duh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. During recess time, I like skipping rope. When I skip I shout a rhyme, And jump with all my hope. 2. I didn''t study for the test even though I should''ve. I was playing PS2 and I would''ve, so I copied off of yours, I got them all wrong, so now I sing this song. (sing over and over this is an endless song.) 3. Some gum chum? It''s watermelon, although I chewed it some, and it is jerybellum. (jerybellum - bubble gum co.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor doctor! I keep thinking I''m invisible! WHO SAID THAT?!?!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the male centipede say to the other male centipede when a female centipede walks by? That''s a nice pair of legs, pair of legs, pair of legs, pair of legs.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''a so stupid she stopped at a stop sign and waited untill it changed to ''Go!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than getting raped by Jack the Ripper? Getting fingered by Captain Hook.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the two lesbian frogs say to each other? We taste like chicken!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a clever midget and a venereal disease? One is a cunning runt and the other is a running cunt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a clitoris, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common? Men always miss them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, she turned medusa to stone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old lady sits on her front porch, rocking away the last days of her long life, when all of a sudden, a fairy godmother appears and informs her that she will be granted three wishes. "Well, now," says the old lady, "I guess I would like to be really rich." *** POOF *** Her rocking chair turns to solid gold. "And, gee, I guess I wouldn''t mind being a young, beautiful princess." *** POOF *** She turns into a beautiful young woman. "Your third wish?" asks the fairy godmother. Just then the old woman''s cat wanders across the porch in front of them. "Ooh - can you change him into a handsome prince?" she asks. *** POOF *** There before her stands a young man more handsome than anyone could possibly imagine. She stares at him, smitten. With a smile that makes her knees weak, he saunters across the porch and whispers in her ear, "Bet you''re sorry you had me neutered."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Warning - Please DO NOT look at the bottom of the page before you answer ALL the questions 1) What is a four-letter word that ends in k and means the same as intercourse? 2) What is it that a cow has four of and a woman has only two of? 3) What can you find in a man''s pants that is about six inches long, has a head on it, and that women love so much that they often blow it? 4) What word starts with f and ends with u-c-k? 5) What four letter word begins with f and ends with k, and if you can''t get one you can use your hands? 6) What is hard, six inches long, has two nuts, and can make a girl fat? 7) What is it that all men have one of; it''s longer on some men than on others; the pope doesn''t use his; and a man gives it to his wife after they''re married? ANSWERS: 1. (talk) 2. (legs) 3. (a twenty dollar bill) 4. (firetruck) 5. (fork) 6. (Almond Joy candy bar) 7. (last name)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s So stupid she put yellow for the answer to the following question: What color is Santa''s red suit?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re about as useful as a bargain hunter in Sears!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die from natural causes. 2. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The FBI and the DEA are joining efforts and will be assigning some of their agents to a quasi-FBI/DEA enforcement team specifically targeting the illegal allergy pills sales that occur on the black market. The agents will be called "Pseudo Feds."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she shoved a battery up her butt and yelled I''ve got the power', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between a black owl and a white owl? A: White owl: Who who Black owl: Who that who that', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a blond, a red head, and a brunette. They had to tell a joke in order not to go to hell. So the red head goes first: "What do you call a boy going to jail? A Micheal Jackson lover." (not that funny) So she goes to hell. Then the burnette says: "What''s the difference between your mama and the blond''s mama? The blond''s has a bigger chance on giving it up and yours doesn''t need any." (not that funny either) So, she goes to hell as well. Finally, the blond says: "Knock-knock! Who''s there? God God who? Godzilla!" (not that funny) But, the blond gets in! Why? Because, she used God and didn''t notice it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why was Raggedy Anne kicked out of the toypen? A: Because she kept sitting on Pinnochio''s face saying, "Lie to me, lie to me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife are in the bed watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?" He turns to her and says, "Do you want to have sex?" "No," she answered. He replies, "Is that your final answer?" "Yes," she said. He then replies, "I''d like to phone a friend." That''s the last thing he remembers. . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s 50 cents call someone who cares', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you can tell time... Why can''t you tell that I don''t have time for you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever wonder why your ears are where they are? Just think, if they were on your butt, you would have to pull down your pants to hear what I''m saying --REDD FOXX', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a girl named Ann Hyser Who claimed that no man could surprise her. But old Pabst made a push at the Schlitz in her Busch and now she is sadder Budweiser! *This joke was made by Bill Klompus* Go Bill!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a stupid boy named Max. His dad wanted to see what he would do if he gave him a dollar, so Max''s dad gave him a dollar the next day. Max was so excited. As he walked to school that day, the dollar in his hand, a little girl came up to him and said, "I will give you 2 shiny quarters for that dollar." Max figured that 2 was better than 1, so he willingly traded. When Max reached the school, a little boy came up to him and said, "I''ll give you 3 dimes for those 2 quarters." Max traded again. Then his teacher came up to him, and knowing that he was so dumb, asked him to trade his 3 dimes for 4 nickels. Again, he traded. As Max was walking home from school that day, a old man came up to him and said, "Will you trade those 4 nickels for these 5 pennies?" Max traded. When Max got home, his dad asked his where his money was. Max showed him and Max never got money again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did our founding fathers expressed equality, but the constitution says people born in other countries can''t be president?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please tell me how to obey these signs: All Night Dance Club; NO MUSIC ALLOWED Public Stairway; Please do not climb on stairs Country Road; NO PEDESTRIANS OR AUTOMOBILES A room in a touch-an-feel musem; Do not touch A seminar for the deaf; Please listen to others Local bookstore; Feel free to read books in this section, however do not read them in this store A local carpet store completely covered in rugs; Come in! Please do not step on rugs And please tell me who wrote these signs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the 60''s, people took acid to make the world appear weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when a dinosuar stubs its toe? A: Stubasaurus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This above a uranal. What are you looking at? The real joke is in your hands!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('General Ways to Annoy People Announce when you''re going to the bathroom. Ask people to prove everything they say. (e.g. "I''m Bob, nice to meet you..." "PROVE IT!") ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE. Before exiting the elevator, push all the buttons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How To Annoy People In An Elevator: Ask, "Did you hear that cable snapping sound?" Call the psychic hotline from you cell phone, and ask if they know what floor you''re on. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That''s mine!" Hum the theme from Mission Impossible with yours eyes darting around the elevator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ways To Annnoy Your Roommate Become a mime. Nothing is more annoying than a mime. Ask your roommate if your family can move in "just for a couple of weeks." Buy some turtles. Paint numbers on their backs. Race them down the hall. Chain yourself to your roommate''s bed. Get him/her to bring you food.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ways To Annoy People In The Computer Lab Bring some dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking. Light candles in a circle around your terminal before starting. Play "Pong" for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab. Try to stick a Nintendo cartridge into the 3 1/2 disc drive, when it doesn''t work, get the supervisor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ways To Annoy People On The Subway Stand in front of the doorway and glare at people when they try to get by. Constantly ask people for directions. Don''t take a shower for a month. Tell the people your problems. They really want to know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many rich people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They hire people to do it for them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond and a red-head were planning to go to an amusement park. When they got to the park the blond asks, "who will pay, You or me?". So the red-head says, "I''ll tell you what, you''ll pay for entrance, and I''ll pay for all the rides." (The rides don''t cost anything at all!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a small jokester called Joey, who was visting at his Grandpa''s. Now Grandpa was rather short of temper, so after Joey had been standing in the doorway for 5 minutes, trying to decide whether or not to go outside, he said, ''''Hurry up, now will you?'''' Joey turned around and frowned. ''''Keep your hair on,'''' he grumbled. Seeing Grandpa''s bald head, he giggled, ''''Opps! To late!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a slave market, an owner is showing his slaves for selling. A man come to the shop and pointing to an American slave and asked, "how much he is?". The owner said, "$100". And the man pioint to a Russian slave, asked again, and the owner reply, "$1000". The man point to Japanese slave, and the owner reply , "$10000". Finally the man point to a African slave and ask the price, the owner reply, "$100000". The customer is confused and ask, "Why that black slave cost too much?". The owner reply, "His brain is still new, he never used his brain". ----------------------------------- I don''t mean to make someone feel bad. Coz i am a afro-american :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are you laughing at? Your mom is a hooker!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feet does a black rooster have? How many wings does a black rooster have? How many heads does a black rooster have? How many hairs are on the back of a white cat? Why is it that you know more about a black cock rather than a white pussy?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call a blond, redneck lawyer? A. Yo Momma!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best things in life are free and the worst things in life cost only $19.95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so fat that when she has sex she has show directions!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bobby-Hey do you remember what the teacher said in fourth hour? Jessica-?--------??? Bobby-Did you just have a blonde moment?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I have this great knock knock joke for you! Knock Knock Who''s there? Hello? Hello who? Hello? Hello who!!? Oh Hi? Hey, I have this great knock knock joke for you! Okay knock knock. Who''s there? Hello? Who''s there!!!!!!?? The door slams. Knock knock. Ding Dong. Fine. Hello? Hello? Hello!!!? *peacecylone*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a very busy high way there stood three images. Santa, The easter bunny and a smart mexican. Well who crossed the street first? None There is no such thing as santa, the easter bunny, or a smart mexican.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s missing? ch_ _ ch U R you are', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a robot''s favorite food? Nuts and bolts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Where does a fish like to sleep? A. In a river bed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Where do Comedians go if they are sick? A. To the He-He-Mergency room!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why was the Gum so mad in class? A. It was Chewed Out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a computer? A. A lot of Bytes!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why was the piano locked out? A. Because he had no keys!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Who likes to make dinner for Peter Pan? A. Captain Cook!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call a cow that gives chocolate milk? A. An Utter Delight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man scolded his son for being so unruly and the child rebelled against his father. He got some of his clothes, his teddy bear and his piggy bank and proudly announced, "I''m running away from home!" The father calmly decided to look at the matter logically. "What if you get hungry?" he said. "Then I''ll come home and eat!" bravely declared the child. "And what if you run out of money?" "I will come home and get some!" readily replied the child. The man then made a final attempt, "What if your clothes get dirty?" "Then I''ll come home and let mommy wash them," was the reply. The man shook his head and exclaimed, "This kid is not running away from home, he''s going off to college!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why couldn''t the Human Torch get married? He couldn''t find his Match!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a stupid garbage can? A Dumb-ster!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the director say after making the Mummy Movie? "It''s a Wrap!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What always stays hot inside a refridgerator? A. Salsa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Colter was explaining that there were rules for voting in the United States. "You have to be at least eighteen, you have to be a citizen, and-" John blurts out, "And you can''t vote for democrats!"* * All credit for this goes to John Rieger, who wouldn''t shut up during sixth period.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My little sister recently asked me: "Why does the conductor of the band always wave his magic wand, but the players never disappear?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No, of course it isn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GEORGE W. BUSH PRESIDENTIAL LIBRARY DESTROYED BY FLOOD Crawford, Texas (AP) A tragic flood this morning destroyed the personal library of President George W. Bush. The flood began in the presidential bathroom where the books were kept. Both books have been lost. A presidential spokesman said the president was devastated, as he had almost finished coloring the second one. The White House tried to call FEMA but there was no answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What little girl takes from the rich and gives to the poor? A. Little Red Robbin'' Hood!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama is so fat because your mama''s mama passed down genes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so fat you turn the world upside down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest and a rabbi are sitting in a park talking. A young boy walks by, the priest says "Hey, you want to screw him?" and the rabbi says "Out of what?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had just got to his hotel room with his newlywed wife on thier honeymoon. He said, "Let''s screw." So they took off their clothes and got close and started kissing and the man said, "Wait, we don''t have a condom, I''m not ready for kids yet." So the man called up the bellhop and asked him to bring up a condom. When the bellhop got their he said, "Here is your condom sir, would you like me to put it on your bill?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy an indian and a muslim were in an airport waiting for their flight. After some silence the indian says. "Once my people were many, now we are few." Then the muslim says, "My people were many, we are still many," he turns to the cowboy, "Why do you think that is?" The cowboy says, "Maybe that''s ''cause we haven''t played cowboys ''n'' muslims yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walks into her accountant''s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says: "Before we begin, I''ll need to ask you a few questions." He gets her name, address, social security number, etc, and then asks, "what is your occupation?" "I''m a whore," she says. The accountant balks and says, "No, No, No, that won''t work. That is too gross. Let''s try to rephrase that." The woman says, "OK, I''m a high-end call girl." "No, that is still too crude. Try again." They both think for a minute, then the woman says, "I''m an elite chicken farmer." The accountant asks, "What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore & call girl? "Well, I raised over a thousand little peckers last year." He replies: "Good enough."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you plant dope? Bury a blond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond was stuck on an island. She could not get off, but there was an interesting structure on the island that intrigued her. It was a building with a small hole running through the bottom of it, and a bit away from it was a small hole, about five inches in diameter. She realized that there was no food on the island. She was stuck there for two days when the intendent came out and said, "Ma''am, the pedestrians here would appreciate it if you would get off of the Western Golf Course for awhile."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she sneezed and caused a hurricane!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother explained to her daughter, "We didn''t have TVs not to long time ago, sweetie." She looks at her mother strangely and asks, "Then how did they play their VCR''s?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor who had been seeing an 80-year-old woman for most of her life finally retired. At her next checkup, the new doctor asked her to bring a list of all the medicines that had been prescribed for her. As the young doctor was looking through these, his eyes grew wide as he realized she had a prescription for birth control pills. "Mrs. Smith, do you realize these are BIRTH CONTROL pills?" "Yes, they help me sleep at night." "Mrs. Smith, I assure you there is absolutely NOTHING in these that could possibly help you sleep!" She reached out and patted the young Doctor''s knee. "Yes, dear, I know that. But every morning, I grind one up and mix it in the glass of orange juice that my 18 year old granddaughter drinks; believe me, it helps me sleep at night!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. knock knock, who''s there? Ima, Ima who? Ima hungry can we eat yet? 2. knock knock, who''s there? peas, peas who? peas can we start know 3. knock knock, who''s there? phil, phil who? phil my cup up with water please', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harvey''s grandfather clock suddenly stops working right one day, so he loads it into his van and takes it to a clock repair shop. In the shop is a little old man who insists he is Swiss, and has a heavy German accent. He asks Harvey, "Vat sims to be ze problem?" Harvey says, "I''m not sure, but it doesn''t go ''tick-tocktick -tock'' anymore. Now it just goes ''tick...tick...tick.''" The old man says, "Mmm-Hm!" and steps behind the counter, where he rummages around a bit. He emerges with a huge flashlight and walks over the grandfather clock. He turns the flashlight on, and shines it directly into the clocks face. Then he says in a menacing voice, "Ve haf vays of making you tock!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('rudeness - someone who keeps talking while your are trying to interrupt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, please hurry. My son swallowed a razor blade. "Don''t panic, I''m coming immediately. Have you done anything yet?" "Yeah, I shaved with the electric razor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile"? JOHN: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L." TEACHER: No, that''s wrong. JOHN: Maybe it''s wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark? FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write? SYLVIA: Your name on this report card.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Of course you know they have changed the look of twenty dollar bills recently. What happens to the old ones? Bill Gates gets them!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pinocchio had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters when they were having sex. Pinocchio, therefore, went to visit Gepetto to see if he could help. Gepetto suggested he try a little sandpaper wherever indicated and Pinocchio skipped away enlightened. A couple of weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing happily through town and asked him, "How''s the girlfriend?" Pinocchio replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From a brunette''s point of view: Blondes may have more fun but hey, at least we can read!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to know a dirty joke? A white horse falls into a mud puddle. Wanna know a clean joke? The horse takes a shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do the letters "INRI" at the top of Jesus'' cross stand for? I''m Nailed Right In.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus sees a woman being assaulted by an angry crowd and steps in front of her and says, "let he who hath no sin cast the first stone." From the crowd comes a rock flying at the woman. Jesus looks over and says, "Damn it mother, sometimes you really piss me off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer is going down the road with his horse pulling his wagon and his dog lying next to ''em. The farmer says, "It sure is hot out here." The horse turns back and says, "It sure is." The farmer says, "I didn''t know horses could talk." The dog said, "Neither did I."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was smoking a cigarette. Another guy comes up to him and asks, "Do you have an extra cigarette?" The first guy looks at the box and reads that it contains 20 cigarettes. He counts all the cigarettes in his box and says,"Nope, don''t got any extra cigarettes".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is Yo Momma? Yo Momma doesn''t know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Over 75% of the jokes submitted to this site are duplicates. Please search the website before submitting a joke to make sure yours it is not already listed. Before submitting your joke, please check it for spelling and grammatical errors because you will not be able to correct them later. If this is your first time submitting a joke, please review the Style Guidelines. Most importantly, do not use copyrighted jokes without the permission of the author.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is laziness!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys decided to go buy two pigs. So after they bought them they wanted to know which one was who''s. So they went to the barn but when they got there the two pigs were fighting. After they broke them up one pig was missing a ear. So one guy said, "What are we going to do now?" So after they thought about it for a while they went back to the barn. When they got there the pigs were fighting again. After they broke them up one pig was missing a tail. So the guy said, ''''What now?'''' After they thought about it for a while they went back to the barn. The pigs were fighting again. After they broke them up one pig was missing a leg. So the guy said, ''''What now?'''' The other guy said, "FUCK IT! I get the white one and you get the black one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was screaming into his phone saying "Can you hear me now?". Annoyed, a CIA offical said "Yes, we can hear you now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To save a tree remove a Bush.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a woman with one black eye? A fast learner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the end of the world arrives how will the media report it? USA Today: WE''RE DEAD The Wall Street Journal: DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS National Enquirer: O.J. AND NICOLE, TOGETHER AGAIN Microsoft Systems Journal: APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE Victoria''s Secret Catalog: OUR FINAL SALE Sports Illustrated: GAME OVER Wired: THE LAST NEW THING Rolling Stone: THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR Readers Digest: ''BYE Discover Magazine: HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS? Lady''s Home Journal: LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET! America Online: SYSTEM TEMPORARILY DOWN. TRY CALLING BACK IN 15 MINUTES. Inc. magazine: TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE TIME magazine: RENEW YOUR SUBSCRIPTION FOR ETERNITY', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A crab and an ant lost their homes. The crab says to the ant, "I''m going to find us a place to sleep tonight." They''re walking and the crab sees a naked lady walking towards them. "Hey, ant. You see that lady? We''re going to crawl up to her bush and go to sleep there tonight." Once up there, the crab say''s to the ant, "You see that door? You go up there and sleep tonight and I''ll sleep in her bush." That night when they were asleep the lady had a guy friend come over and they had sex. That morning the ant say to the crab, "How did you sleep, Crab?" The crab says, "Great. How did you sleep, Ant?" "Well," the ant says "in that door you sent me at about two o''clock in the morning, someone stuck there fist in there and beat my ass. After that, they spit on me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she ties her shoes with spahgetti so she can eat and run.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your are in Alaska when you go to court and they ask you where you were on the night of October to April!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so bald, I can read her mind', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can a mane date the sister of his widow? No, because you can''t date when you are dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Person #1: "Want to hear a joke?" Person #2: "Sure." Person #1: "Your face." ~ Your momma is so fat, she is overweight. ~ Two turds were hanging out. The first one was moaning and groaning. The second one asked, "What''s wrong?" The first one replied, "I feel like crap."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, there was a blonde who called her boyfriend and said, "Baby, I''m working on this puzzle and it''s really hard. Can you come and help me?" He asked what it looked like and she replied saying that there was a tiger on the box. The boyfriend was convinced to come over and help. She welcomed him at the door and showed him the mess of pieces on her coffee table. After observing the peices, the boyfriend said, "Okay, sweetie, let''s sit down, relax, have some coffee, then can we please put the frosted flakes back in the box?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('D.A.R.E. sadly doesn''t stand for Drugs Are Really Excellent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she asked to buy a vowel on Wheel of Fortune and said "S"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- You''re so stupid, you got locked inside a grocery store and starved to death! - You''re so big, you play pool with the planets! - You''re so fat, when you went outside in yellow clothes, someone screamed, "TAXI!" - You''re so big, when you go to the movies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge frowns at the criminal report of the man he is judging. He asks, "So you robbed the same store on three successive nights?" The robber replies, "Yes your honor." The judge, even more perplexed asks, "And why was that?" "Because my wife wanted a dress," says the robber. The judge checks with his records, "But it says here you broke in three nights in a row!" "Yes sir. She made me exchange it twice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of sneakers do chickens wear? Re-bok-bok-bok-bok-bok.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Smith: "So, Mr. Jones, how''s your son John?" Mr. Jones: "He''s at Harvard right now." Mr. Smith: "Oh, really?! Well, congratulations! What''s he studying?" Mr. Jones: "Oh, he''s not studying anything. They''re studying him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool and show who was boss on the aviation frequencies. So, this was his first time approaching a field during the nighttime. Instead of making any official requests to the tower, he said, "Guess who?" The controller switched the field lights off and replied, "Guess where!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one. 2. How many Candains does it take to change a lightbulb? One to whack it out with his hockey stick, and one to screw in the new one. 3. How many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb? One to screw it in, 2 to support him, and 1 to disagree with his lightbulb approach. 4. How many terrorists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1 to crash a plane into the lightbulb, and 1 to put in the new lightbulb. 5. How many soccer players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to take out the old one, one to attempt to kick it in to the socket, and one to buy new bulbs after the kicking attemts fail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was younger my father always told me to be more lady like and civil. I decided to teach him a lesson. When we arrived at his mothers house there were donuts on the table. We sat around and talked(and munched) I soon got up to excuse myself saying "I have to pee." Dad reminded me that there was a better way to put that. "I''m sorry" I said "I have to powder my nose like a racehorse."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you haven''t read this joke', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Me DUHH!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? I don''t know, ask the chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blonde say to the red head? Nothing. She couldn''t remember what she was going to say!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your so ugly, when you were born the doctors shoved you back in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one penny say to another penny? Let''s get together and make cents', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but it takes a certified electrician to make it work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are so small that on your ID picture, your feet showed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a redneck if: You think the following is funny You haven''t read the joke "You are a Redneck If... #900".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat if they named a hurricane after her it would have to be a category 20.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas so stupid she asked how much she had to pay to get a free car-wash.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mommas so stupid, she brought a TV remote to the movie theater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so dirty, she went in for a shower and lost weight!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are sitting next to a dead guy. The first one can only say, "Yup! Yup! Yup!" The second one can say, "Forks and Knives. Forks and knives." Finally, the third one can say, "Goddie, goodie gumdrops! Goodie, goodie gumdrops!" A cop comes by and asks the first one if he killed the man. Unable to say anything else, he says, "Yup! Yup! Yup!" Then he asks the second man, "What weapons did you use?" The second man says, "Forks and Knives. Forks and knives." Astonished, he is taken back for a second and then tells them all that they will go to jail. The third man tries to plead, "Goddie, goodie gumdrops! Goodie, goodie gumdrops!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a joke to do to a very gullible person. You start off by telling that person to say "Just like me", whenever you say something. You then start: "I went to my house" Just like me. "And walked through the door" just like me "and up the stairs" just like me "and then I walked down the hall" just like me "and opened the door to my room" just like me " And then I heard a noise" just like me " and I looked out my window" just like me "And saw a monkey that looked" just like me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is playing poker, and sees a sign that says: If You Have A Gambling Problem call 1-800-GAMBLING. So the man calls the hotline and says, "The guy on my right has an ace and a two, I have a three and a jack, there is a four, a five, and a queen on the table, what should I do?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Gain weight. At least 30 pounds. 2. Stop exercising. Waste of time. 3. Read less. Makes you think. 4. Watch more TV. You''ve been missing some good stuff. 5. Procrastinate more. Starting tomorrow. 6. Stop bringing lunch from home: Eat out more. 7. Get in a whole NEW rut! 8. Spend your summer vacation in Cyberspace. 9. Don''t eat cloned meat. 10. Create loose ends. 11. Get more toys. 12. Get further in debt. 13. Don''t believe politicians. 14. Break at least one traffic law. 15. Avoid airplanes that spontaneously drop 1000 feet. 16. Don''t swim with piranhas or sharks. 17. Associate with even worse business clients. 18. Spread out priorities beyond ability to keep track of them. 19. Wait around for opportunity. 20. Focus on the faults of others. 21. Mope about faults. 22. Never make New Year''s resolutions again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so nasty that she can help stop air pollution by not breathing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If he concentrates on the bottle because it says, "from concentrate!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A son and a father are walking together in a sunday morning, chatting. They enter a park and pass by a big, fat man, on a bench, drooling in his sleep (with his mouth open) and a bag of potato chips on his lap. As they pass by him the son snickers, while the father sighs. They continue walking talking about many things. Eventually, a hot woman in a red dress passes by, the son looks at her with eyes of passion. The father looks at her too. "Son, don''t be fooled by a woman''s good looks" the son looks at his father, ready for a lesson. "That''s your mom 20 years ago" then he sighs. "That''s your mom now", he says as he looks at the man on the bench.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thank you for using Wocka.com. This page states the terms and conditions under which you may use the web site. It is important that you read this page carefully because by opening our web site you agree to be bound, without limitation or qualification, by these terms. If you do not accept any of the terms stated here then do not use the web site. This web site may, in its sole discretion, modify or revise these terms at any time by updating this web page. You are bound by any such modification or revision and should therefore visit this page periodically to review the terms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Use of our web site is at all times "at your own risk." If you are dissatisfied with any of the materials, other contents of the web site, any of these terms and conditions, the web site''s privacy policy, or any other policies, your only remedy is to discontinue use of our web site. In no event shall the web site, or its suppliers, be liable to any user or third party, for any damages whatsoever resulting from the use or inability to use the web site or the material on that site, whether based on warranty, contract, tort, or any other legal theory, and whether or not the web site is advised of the possibility of such damages.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you would like to link your web site to Wocka.com, please freely bookmark or add links to any page contained within this web site provided that this site does not appear inside any frames.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wocka.com and material therein are provided without warranties of any kind, whether express or implied. The web site, to the fullest extent permitted by law, disclaim all warranties, including but not limited to warranties of title, fitness for a particular purpose, merchantability and non-infringement of proprietary or third party rights. The web site makes no warranties about the accuracy or reliability of the material, services, text, graphics, and/or links. The web site does not warrant that the web site will operate error-free or that this web site or its server are free of computer viruses or other harmful items. If your use of our web site or the material on this site results in the need for servicing or replacing equipment or data, the web site is not responsible for those costs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At its discretion, this site may remove any material posted on our web site that infringes on the rights of others. If you believe that your work has been used improperly or your copyrights have been violated we encourage you to contact us', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our web site contains links to third party web sites that are maintained by others. These links are provided solely as a convenience to you and not as an endorsement by the web site of the contents on these third-party web sites. The web site is not responsible for the content of linked third-party sites and does not make any representations regarding the content or accuracy of materials on such third-party web sites. If you decide to access linked third-party web sites, you do so at your own risk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our website contains links to other websites that are created and maintained by us. When visiting one of these sites, our privacy policy and terms of use remain the same. No information of any kind is shared between these sites. These sites are: Braingle.com - User submitted and ranked jokes. PuzzleSolver.com - Solutions to many popular puzzles. DuckRocket.com - Easy, Fast Email GeoSnapper.com - Enables users to upload and distribute accurately geo-referenced digital photographs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This site logs the IP addresses and types of browser used by its guests. This information is used to monitor and make improvements to the site. This site does not secretly collect any personally identifiable information. User''s may choose to become a registered user, in which case they may choose to reveal information about themselves such as their email address. This information will never be shared or sold. Users may remove themselves and their information from the web site''s database by contacting us. This website and the advertisers on this website conform to the Children''s Online Privacy Protection Act', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cookie is a piece of data stored on the user''s hard drive. This site uses cookies to maintain state between pages on this site. The user may remove these cookies at any time by logging out of the web site. Advertisers on this site may use cookies. However, we have no access to or control over these cookies. The ads on this website are provided by Burstmedia. You may read their Privacy Policy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We use IP addresses and browser type to analyze trends and administer the site. We do not do reverse DNS lookups, so IP addresses are not linked to personally identifiable information.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We may share aggregated information with our partners and advertisers. This is not linked to any personally identifiable information.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This web site contains links to other sites. Please be aware that we are not responsible for the privacy practices of such other sites. We encourage our users to be aware when they leave our site and to read the privacy statements of each and every web site that collects personally identifiable information. This privacy statement applies solely to information collected by this Web site.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From time-to-time our site requests information from users via surveys. Participation in these surveys or contests is completely voluntary and the user therefore has a choice whether or not to disclose this information. Information requested may include contact information (such as name and shipping address), and demographic information (such as zip code, age level). Survey information will be used for purposes of monitoring or improving the use and satisfaction of this site.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This website takes every precaution to protect our users'' information. When users submit sensitive information via the website, your information is protected both online and off-line. If you have any questions about the security at our website, you can contact us.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If we decide to change our privacy policy, we will post those changes on this page so our users are always aware of what information we collect, how we use it, and under what circumstances, if any, we disclose it. We will always use information in accordance with the privacy policy under which the information was collected.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We rated with RSAC i, TM Safe Surf Rated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please submit any comments you have using this form: Your Email Address: Message: Send Feedback', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend told me these songs about Barney. I hope you like them. (In rhythm to I Love You) I hate you You hate me We''re a violent family With a great big gun and a bang from me to you Won''t you say you hate me too. (In rhythm to Joy To The World) Joy to the world Barney''s dead I barbequed his head What happened to his body I flushed it down the potty And around and around it goes And around and around it And around and around around around it goes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamas so dumb she put a quarter in a parking meter and said "Hey! Wheres my gumball?".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q.What did one sheep call the other sheep who stole his food? A. a ba-a-astard', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your baby stroller consists of a potato sack and a wheelbarrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so scary, she killed Freddy Krouger in his own dreams.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An ant and an elephant got married. After they had sex, the elephant had a heart attack and died. "Crap," the ant said. "Five minutes of passion and now the rest of my life digging a grave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid, when I told her to turn on the tv, she started stripping.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What disease frightens ghosts the most? BoOoOo-bonic Plague What''s the difference between girl ghosts and boy ghosts? BoOoOo-bies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the blonde make the gymnastics team? When they asked for a cartwheel, she stole a tire from the hot dog vendor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the blonde college student doing at the harbor? Looking for an internship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We have all wished for something, but think about this: Hold out your hands, wish in one, and crap in the other. Which hand do you think will get filled up first?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q> Why did Pepsi hire Michael Jackson to do commercials again? A> Because they wanted someone to suck that little boy back out of the bottle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How does a redneck take a bubble bath? A: He farts in a puddle', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do women fake orgasms? A. Because they think men care!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('% cat "food in cans" cat: can''t open food in cans % nice man woman No manual entry for woman. % rm God rm: God nonexistent % ar t God ar: God does not exist] % ar r God ar: creating God % "How would you rate Quayle''s incompetence? Unmatched ". % [Where is Jimmy Hoffa? Missing ]. % ^How did the sex change operation go? ^ Modifier failed. % If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have? Too many (''s. % make love Make: Don''t know how to make love. Stop. > % sleep with me bad character % got a light? No match. % man: why did you get a divorce? man:: Too many arguments. % !:say, what is saccharine? Bad substitute. % %blow %blow: No such job. The following are not csh but sh : $ PATH=pretending!/usr/ucb/which sense no sense in pretending! $ drink <bottle; opener bottle: cannot open opener: not found', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette are walking along the sidewalk, and the brunette says she is dying of thirst and wants Dr. Pepper. The blonde runs across town into the nearest hospital and asks the receptionist for Dr. Pepper. The receptionist says OK, and hands her a bottle of soda. The blonde says, "What do you think this is? A Joke? My friend is dying and needs to see Dr. Pepper right away!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are scissors such good dancers? A: Because of their sharp moves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock Who''s there? Did you ever hear the joke about the broken pencil? Did you ever hear the joke about the broken pencil who? Nevermind, it''s pointless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a recent PETA meeting, some members were discussing people they had seen wearing fur coats. Joan, a redhead, said, "Yesterday I saw a man wearing a fur coat and I wanted to yell at him about the cruelness of that coat!" Jack, a brown haired man, said, "I saw a woman wearing a fur coat three days ago and I almost launched into a lecture about animal treatment! If only people wouldn''t do such things." Jan, a blond, said, "You wouldn''t believe what I saw on my way here! A girl, dressed in fur from head to foot! It was unbelievable! I would''ve talked to her about cruelty to animals, but I was in the car. You wouldn''t guess what she looked like." "What?" Joan and Jack said in unison. Jan said, "A golden retriever!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you seen the lottery tickets from India? If the spot on your ticket matches the spot on your forehead, you win a 7-11 store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A customer (a middle-aged woman) arrived to have a massage from among the fifteen or so blind masseurs. She came with a side-kick who brought along her things from the office. Approaching the line of masseurs waiting for customers, Lady - in a voice quite loud as to be overheard "They are good masseurs these blind people, huh?" Sidekick - "Yes, ma''am" Lady - "But I heard that the blind who are nearly deaf are the best because they can concentrate more on what they are doing." Just then a masseur interjected - "Excuse me, ma''am your voice sounds familiar - Do I know you?" Lady - "No, I don''t think so," then excitedly louder, "It is my first time to come here!" Masseur - "You are correct, ma''am. My name is Homer! How nice of you to remember!" The lady signalled a thumbs up to her side-kick. Then said "I''ll have my massage here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Parent: You two should sing in the talent show together. Tim: When pigs fly! cindy: You fly?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q> What kind of soup do gay Chinese men like? A> Cream of sum yun guy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only thing truly free of charge is a dead battery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s credit is so bad,,, The bank wants the their calendar back', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy has lived to an extremely old age, and one day his grandson asked him to what he attributes his long life. "Well, you know that every morning, I have a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast," says the old timer. His grandson nods. "Before I eat it, I sprinkle a little gunpowder on it, every day," The ancient cowpoke adds. The grandson decides to follow his grandfather''s breakfast regimen, and each morning of his life, he has oatmeal with gunpowder sprinkled on it. Sure enough, the grandson lives to the ripe old age of 97, and when he died, he left seven children, twenty one grandchildren, eighteen great-grandchildren, and a fifteen foot hole in the side of the crematorium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife were sitting in the living room and he said to her, "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle? If that ever happens, just pull the plug." His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all of his beer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What can a picnic table do that a musician can''t do? Support a family of six!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The child was a typical four-year-old girl - cute, inquisitive, and bright as a new penny. When she expressed difficulty in grasping the concept of marriage, her father decided to pull out his wedding photo album, thinking visual images would help. One page after another, he pointed out the bride arriving at the church, the entrance, the wedding ceremony, the recessional, the reception, etc. "Now do you understand?" he asked. "I think so," she said, "is that when mommy came to work for us?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was bragging about his sister who disguised herself as a man and joined the Army. "But wait a minute," said the listener, "She''ll have to dress with the boys and shower with them too, won''t she?" "Sure," replied the man. "Well? Won''t they find out?" "And who''s gonna tell?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Lazy Bowl Reclining toilet: It''s plush while you flush!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Jack helped you off your horse, later would you return the favor and help Jack off his horse?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day someone knocks on a blonde''s door. She asks: "Who is it?" and the person answers: "It''s me!" Then the blonde wonders, "Me?!?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: May I hold your hand? Girl: It isn''t very heavy. I think I can carry it myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You want me to write a joke!?!? The world is being attacked by aliens! AWWWWW! A warning; they have huge, hairy jaws and beady little eyes and long mangy hair and a huge nose and foul breath and and... oops. That''s just you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three senators were sitting at the bar and having drinks with each other. The democrat started a conversation of were they liked their wives to be positioned during sex, the democrat said that he likes his wife on top, so he can see all of her. The republican said, "No no no I like my wife on the bottom, she needs to know who the one with the control and dominance is." The independent blurted out, "I prefer my wife out of town."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to install a wireless security system: Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men''s used work boots, a really big pair. Put them outside your front door on top of a copy of Guns and Ammo magazine. Put a dog dish beside it, a really big dish. Leave a note on your front door that says something like, "Bubba, Big Mike and I have gone to get more ammunition - back in 1/2 an hr. Don''t disturb the pit bulls. They''ve just been wormed and they are a little edgy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After living in the remote wilderness of Kentucky all his life, an old hillbilly decided it was time to visit the big city. In one of the stores he picks up a mirror and looks in it. Not ever having seen one before, he remarked at the image staring back at him, "How about that! Here''s a picture of my daddy." He bought the ''picture'', but on the way home he remembered his wife, Lizzy, didn''t like his father. So he hung it in the barn, and every morning before leaving for the fields, he would go there and look at it. Lizzy began to get suspicious of these many trips to the barn. One day after her husband left, she searched the barn and found the mirror. As she looked into the glass, she fumed, "So that''s the ugly bitch he''s runnin'' around with."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asked her students to use the word ''fascinate'' in a sentence. Mary said, "My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating." The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted the word ''fascinate''." Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated." The teacher said, "Good, but I wanted the word ''fascinate''." Little Johnny Siebert raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was noted for his bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word ''fascinate'' so she called on him. Johnny said, "My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the elephant doing on the highway? About 5 mph', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the cannibal who was expelled from school? He was caught buttering up his teacher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics. The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist." Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled in furious fashion. Some students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the existence of the chair. One member of the class however, was up and finished in less than a minute. Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered how he could have gotten an A when he had barely written anything at all. His answer consisted of two words: "What chair?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when she put on a red sweater and went outside all the kids said "Kool-aid man!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl walks into a bar and sits down with her friend. She is feeling down, so she talks to her friend. Her friend says "Go get a beer." She says she didn''t want one. Then the friend says "Hey, who said it was for you?" copyright fox corp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so ugly, she looks like your dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ryan''s teeth were so yellow that when he walked outside, the sun said give me my butter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma was so fat that when she went to do her daily running, her body was moving but she wasn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was watching Beauty and the Geek the other day, and felt like submitting this joke (as it''s somewhat similar to something that happened in the show). A blonde is in school, and her teacher is having a random discussion about IQs. Teacher: "So what would you say your IQ is?" she asks a student Kid #1: "I don''t know.. I think it''s just the regular 100." Teacher: "He, he, alright, you?" she asks another student. Kid #2: "Umm... well... I took a test and it''s 118." Teacher: "Ah, you''re pretty smart, then." The teacher then realizes that someone is not paying attention. Teacher: "What IQ do you think you have, young lady?" The blonde jolts up a little due to the surprise. Blonde: "My IQ?" Teacher: "Yes." The blonde then grins arrogantly, "Heh, my IQ is, I would say, probably like an A right now... what is that? Like a 4.0?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so old, I slapped her back and her tits fell off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma''s so fat, she uses a matress as a tampon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do they put underwear on corpses? Why do people say "The alarm just went off" when really it just came on? If a vampire were Jewish would his Sabbath start at sunrise? Why do child labor laws not prohibit children from acting in movies? If your eyes are crossed, do your tears fall straight? If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense? Is the vice president''s wife called the second lady? Do you wake up or open your eyes first? Can you "zone out" and be "in the zone" at the same time? If French kissing is a big thing in America, how do French people react to normal American kissing? Why is it called a soap opera when nobody sings?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have I ever told you about my uncle Jeffy? Well, as a kid my uncle Jeffy lost all of his hair, and everyone thought he was sick, so he went to a doctor. The doctor told him "Jeffy, you are not sick." He was right because, later in life, Jeffy was in school and walked through a wall! It turned out Jeffy had magical powers! He then got a pet dragon and learned how to fly. We go visit Uncle Jeffy at the Mental Institution every 1st of the month.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy went to the bathroom at school, but when he went to wipe his bum, there was no toilet paper so he used his hands. When he got back to class, his teacher asked him what he had in his hands. "A little leprechaun and if I open my hand he''ll get scared away," the boy said. He was then sent to the principal''s office and the principal asked him what he had in his hands. "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he''ll get scared away." He was sent home and his mom asked him what he had in his hands. "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he''ll get scared away." He was sent to his room and his dad came in and asked him what he had in his hands. "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands he''ll get scared away." Then his Dad got really mad and yelled, "Open your hands!" "Look, Dad. You scared the crap out of him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A class is on a field trip to the zoo. They are in the farm animal''s section, and all of the sudden the entire class looks to their right and see 2 pigs going at it like it was the last day on Earth. Boy: o.o umm... teacher, what are those pigs doing? Teacher: O.O I don''t think those are pigs...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes, I get so sleepy that I fall asleep at my keyboa-----hogasvfbhjhfaokL;''GRUHIKMUIHGDFJSJIKkljhvLD ;YWEHKJF,HCsssljga lrsaio.ra;ugsrol,.k,ijhekng0ljr', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn''t find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, "Great, so now you''re cheating on me with a bald woman!" The next night, when she didn''t smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, "She''s not only bald, but she''s too cheap to buy any perfume!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After his recent stay in the hospital, Pa was particularly irritable, especially regarding food. At a nearby restaurant he stopped for a quick meal and the waiter provided a bowl of soup. As the waiter turned away to return to the kitchen Pa stopped him, calling: "Waiter!" "Yes, sir, is there something wrong?" "The soup. Taste it," replied Pa. "I beg your pardon, sir?" "Taste it." "But, sir, I can assure you that the soup is excellent." "Taste it," Pa persisted. "Sir, the soup was made this morning of the finest ingredients." "Taste it!" The exasperated waiter finally relented. "All right, sir, I''ll taste it." Then after a pause he said, "Where is the spoon?" To which Pa replied triumphantly, "Ah ha ... "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new Librarian decided that instead of checking out children''s books by writing the names of borrowers on the book cards herself, she would have the youngsters sign their own names. She would then tell them they were signing a "Contract" for returning the books on time. Her first customer was a second grader, who looked surprised to see a new Librarian. He brought four books to the desk and shoved them across to the Librarian, giving her his name as he did so. The Librarian pushed the books back and told him to sign them out. The boy laboriously printed his name on each book card and then handed them to her with a look of utter disgust. Before the Librarian could even start her speech he said, scornfully, "That other Librarian we had could write."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some men in a pickup truck drove to a lumber yard. One of the men walked into the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos." The clerk asked, "You mean two-by-fours, don''t you?" The man said, "I''ll go check," and went back to the truck. He returned shortly and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-four." "All right. How long do you need them?" The customer paused for a moment and said, "I''d better go check." After a while, he returned to the office and said, - "A long time. We''re gonna build a house..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An autopsy professor was giving an introductory lecture to a class of students. Standing over a corpse, he addressed the class. "There are two things you need to make a career in medical forensics. First, you must have no fear." Having said that, he shoved his finger up the corpse''s anus and licked it. "Now you must do the same," he told the class. After a couple of minutes of uneasy silence, the class did as instructed. "Second," the professor continued, "you must have an acute sense of observation. For instance, how many of you noticed that I put my middle finger up this man''s anus, but licked my index finger?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a holdup in Long Beach, California, would be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company, suspecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and lost a finger. The chef''s claim was approved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was traveling back to my hometown and, responding to Mother Nature, decided to stop at one of those rest areas on the side of the road. I went into the washroom. The first stall was taken, so I went into the second stall. I had just sat down when I heard a voice from the other stall. "Hi there, how is it going?" I am not the type to strike up conversations with strangers while sitting on the john in restrooms on the side of the road. I didn''t know what to do, but finally I said, "Not bad." Then the voice said, "So, what are you doing?" At this point, I was starting to find the situation a bit weird, but I said, "Well, I''m headed back east." Then I heard the person, all flustered, say, "Look, I''ll call you back. Every time I ask you a question, the idiot in the next stall keeps answering me!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The manager of a large office noticed one of his department heads had hired a new man, so the boss called him into his office for a little orientation speech. "What is your name?" he asked. "John," the new guy replied. The manager scowled, "Look, I don''t know what kind of place you worked at before, but I don''t call anyone by their first name. It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my employees by their last names only - Smith, Jones, Baker - that''s all. I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson. Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?" The new guy sighed and said, "Darling. John Darling." "Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When we moved cross-country, my wife and I decided to drive both of our cars. Nathan, our eight-year-old, worriedly asked, "How will we keep from getting separated?" "We''ll drive slowly so that one car can follow the other," I reassured him. "Yeah, but what if we DO get separated?" he persisted. "Well, then I guess we''ll never see each other again," I quipped. "Okay," he said. "I''m riding with Mom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sailor came home from a secret two year mission only to find his wife with a new born baby. Furious, he was determined to track down the father to extract revenge. "Was it my friend Sam?" he demanded. "No!" his weeping wife replied. "Was it my friend Jim then?" he asked. "NO!" she said even more upset. "Well, which one of my no-good friends did this then?" he asked. "Don''t you think I have any friends of my own?" she snapped.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tour guide was showing a tourist around Washington, D. C. The guide pointed out the place where George Washington supposedly threw a dollar across the Potomac River. "That''s impossible," said the tourist. "No one could throw a coin that far!" "You have to remember," answered the guide. "A dollar went a lot farther in those days."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John got off the elevator on the 50th floor and nervously knocked on his blind date''s door. She opened it and was as beautiful and charming as everyone had said. "I''ll be ready in a few minutes," she said. "Why don''t you play with Spot, my dog, while you''re waiting?" He does wonderful tricks. He rolls over, shakes hands, sits up and if you make a hoop with your arms, he''ll jump through." The dog followed John onto the balcony and started rolling over. John made a hoop with his arms and Spot jumped through--over the balcony railing. Just then John''s date walked out. "Isn''t Spot the cutest, happiest dog you''ve ever seen?" "To tell the truth, " he replied, "Spot seemed a little depressed to me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man''s life is difficult to understand, when born he struggles to get out of the vagina and then tries the rest of his life to get in!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man spotted a lamp by the roadside. He picked it up, rubbed it vigorously, and a genie appeared. "I''ll grant you your fondest wish," the genie said. The man thought for a moment, then said, "I want a spectacular job -- a job that no man has ever succeeded at or has ever even dared try." "Poof!" said the genie. "You''re a housewife."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When our second child was on the way, my wife and I attended a pre-birth class aimed at couples who had already had at least one child. The instructor raised the issue of breaking the news to the older child. It went like this: "Some parents," she said, "tell the older child, ''We love you so much we decided to bring another child into this family.'' But think about that. Ladies, what if your husband came home one day and said, ''Honey, I love you so much I decided to bring home another wife.''" One of the women spoke up immediately. "Does she cook?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is lost in the desert. He used up the last of his water three days ago and he''s lying, gasping, on the sand, when in the distance he suddenly hears a voice calling "Mush! Mush!" Not trusting his ears he turns his head and there it is again, closer this time -- "Mush! Mush!" Propping himself up on one elbow he squints against the sun and sees, of all things, an Eskimo in a fur coat driving a sled with a team of huskies across the dunes. Thinking that it''s a hallucination, he blinks and shakes his head, but it''s for real! He painfully lifts one arm and in a cracked voice calls, "He-elp!" The Eskimo pulls the sled up by him, the huskies panting in the heat, and he says to the Eskimo, "I don''t know what you''re doing here, or why, but thank God you are! I''ve been wandering around this desert for days, my water''s all gone and I''m completely lost!" The perspiring Eskimo looks down at him and says, "You think YOU''RE lost!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''d like the number for Christine Smith in Richmond, Virginia, the young man said to the 411 operator. "There are multiple listings for Christine Smith in Richmond, Virginia," the operator said. "Do you have a street name?" The young man hesitated a moment, "Well, uh, most people call me Snake."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 55-year-old man who was born on May 5, has been married 5 years, has 5 children, makes $55,555.55 a year, who''s lucky number is 5 receives a phone call from a friend. The friend informs the man that a horse named Lucky 5 will be running in the fifth race at the local track that evening. Excitedly, the man withdraws 5,555.00 cash from his bank account, goes to the races and bets on Lucky 5 to win. Sure enough, the horse comes in fifth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man, Mr. Goldstein, was living the last of his life in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed. Nurse Tracy asked if there was anything wrong. "Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Goldstein, "My private part died today, and I am very sad." Knowing her patients were forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, "Oh, I''m so sorry, Mr. Goldstein, please accept my condolences". The following day, Mr. Goldstein was walking down the hall with his private part hanging out of his pajamas, when he met Nurse Tracy. "Mr. Goldstein," she said, "you shouldn''t be walking down the hall like that. Please put your private part back inside your pajamas". "But, Nurse Tracy," replied Mr. Goldstein, "I told you yesterday that my private part died". "Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?" asked Nurse Tracy. "Well," he replied. "Today''s the viewing".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A really drunk guy is walking home from the bar and sees a pumpkin patch on the side of the road. He thinks how nice and squishy they must be on the inside, and decides to have a little fun with a pumpkin. He finds a big one, cuts a hole in it, and starts going at it. It must have been getting pretty good because he didn''t even notice that a cop car had pulled up, and that an officer was walking right towards him. The cop says "Hey buddy.... Do you know you''re screwing a pumpkin?" to which the guy responds, "A pumpkin?!? It''s midnight already???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. There is no "I" in "teamwork." But there is in "management kiss-up." 2. If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday. 3. The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts. 4. Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG 14 times gives you job security. 5. If you think we''re a bad company, you should see the competition. 6. Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings. They did it by killing all those who oppose them. 7. Your job is STILL better than asking, "You want fries with that?" 8. If at first you don''t succeed, try management. 9. Teamwork means never having to take all the blame yourself. 10. The beatings will continue until morale improves. 11. Pride, Commitment, Teamwork. Words we use to get you to work for free. 12. Plagiarism saves time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the smart blonde? Neither did I!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she used the Grand Canyon as her sidewalk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day the goverment desided to see how we get along with other countries so they took an american, a frechman and a chinese guy and put them on an island for a year. They tell the american that he is in charge of building. They tell the frenchman that he is in charge of cooking. Then, finally they tell the chinese guy that he is in charge of supplies. One year later the goverment comes back and the american said: "Let me show you what I have built" and so he does. Then the frenchman said: "Let me show you what I have cooked." Then one of the goverment people asked what happened to the chinese guy and they said that the day that they were given their assigments he dissapeared. So they all start looking for him... Finally, the chinese guy jumps out of the woods and says: "Supplies!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our local minister had all of his remaining teeth pulled and new dentures made a few weeks ago. The first Sunday, his sermon lasted 10 minutes. The second Sunday, he preached only 20 minutes. But, on the third Sunday, he preached for an hour and a half. I asked him about this. He then told me "well, John, that first Sunday, my gums were so sore it hurt to talk. The second Sunday, my dentures were still hurting a lot. Now the third Sunday, I accidentally grabbed my wife''s dentures AND I COULDN''T STOP TALKING!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding. He kept on bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher. Finally, after he had bid way more than he intended, he won the bid - the parrot was his at last! As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the auctioneer, "I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can''t talk!" "Don''t worry," said the auctioneer, "he can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman meant to call a record store, but dialed the wrong number and got a private home instead. "Do you have ''Eyes of Blue'' and ''A Love Supreme?''" she asked. "Well, no," answered the puzzled homeowner. "But I have a wife and eleven children." "Is that a record?" the caller inquired, puzzled in her turn. "I don''t think so," replied the man, "but it''s as close as I want to get."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter. Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger coworker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one. As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong. Gasping for breath, she replied, "When I see two men from the gas company running as hard as you two were, I figured I''d better run too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was talking to a couple of boys in the school yard. Each was bragging about how great their fathers are. The first one said: "Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow!" The second one said: "Ha! You think that''s fast? My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet!" Little Johnny listened to the other two boys and shook his head. He then said: "Sorry, dudes... but MY DAD is the fastest. He''s a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30,... and he''s home by 3:45!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The priest was instructing a class of third- graders at All Saints grammar school. "There were two brothers, and one of them chose the wicked path of Satan. The brother was evil and corrupt and did great damage to many people, and wound up a convicted criminal in a tiny, dark cell. "But the other brother studied hard and became a great, rich, knowledgeable lawyer. "Now, children, what is the difference between these two brothers, who started out in the same place, who together embarked upon life''s stormy seas?" Herman raised his hand and said, "Easy. One of them got caught."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, about a month ago, the president was looking for a call girl. He found three such ladies in a local lounge - a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. To the blonde he said, "I am the President of the United States... How much would it cost me to spend some time with you? The blonde replied, "Two hundred dollars." To the brunette he posed the same question, and she replied, "One hundred dollars." He then asked the redhead the same question. The redhead replied, "Mr. President, if you can raise my skirt as high as my taxes... get my panties as low as my wages... get that thing of yours as hard as the times... keep it as high as the gas prices... keep me warmer than my apartment... and... screw me in private the way you do in public, then believe me Mr. President, it ain''t gonna cost you a cent."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma ain''t got no hands. And yo dad ain''t got no eyes. Yo momma said i''m goona slap the shit out of you. And yo daddy said i''d like to see that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Short naps prevent aging, especially if taken while driving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I came out of a convenience store the other day and some seedy looking guy walks up to me and holds up a little sign: "DEAF & DUMB... Can you spare $10?" Wow! What happened to a dollar or 2? So I reached into my pocket for my wallet, opened it, took out a folded piece of paper and handed it to him. It said: "I CAN''T READ" and I walked away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a little tip from me to you as an experienced traveler. Wake-up calls are the worst way to wake up. The phone rings, it''s loud and you can''t turn it down. I leave the number of the room next to me. It just rings very quietly and you hear a guy yell, "Why are you calling me?" Then I get up and take a shower. It''s great.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are three two letter words for small? Is It In?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most of us have a bad habit we are constantly trying to break. For me, it''s biting my fingernails. One day I told my husband about my latest solution: press-on nails. "Great idea, honey," he smiled. "You can eat them straight out of the box."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A taxpayer received a strongly worded "second notice" that his taxes were overdue. Hastening to the collector''s office, he paid his bill, saying apologetically that he had overlooked the first notice. "Oh," confided the collector with a smile, "we don''t send out first notices. We have found that the second notices are more effective."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you marry, your spouse''s family become "in-laws." So, when you divorce, does that make them "outlaws?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A property manager of single-family residence was showing a unit to prospective tenants and asking the usual questions. "Professionally employed?" he asked. "We''re a military family," the wife answered. "Children?" "Oh, yes, ages nine and twelve," she answered proudly. "Animals?" "Oh, no," she said earnestly. "They''re very well behaved."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy loved living in Staten Island, but he wasn''t crazy about the ferry. If you missed a ferry late at night, you had to spend the next hour or so wandering the deserted streets of lower Manhattan. So, when he spotted a ferry no more than fifteen feet from the dock, he decided he wouldn''t subject himself to an hour''s wait. He made a running leap and landed on his hands and knees, a little bruised maybe, but safe on deck. He got up, brushed himself off, and announced proudly to a bystander, "Well, I made that one, didn''t I?" "Sure did," the bystander said. "But you should have waited a minute or two. The ferry is just about to dock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny: "Hey, Daddy, Spot just ate Mom''s apple pie that was on the counter to cool off!" Dad: "Don''t worry, son. We''ll get you a new dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I picked up my mother-in-law at the airport. She''s getting a little up there. She''s at the age where she doesn''t remember things too well. So when I saw her I said, "Thanks for coming. Have a nice flight!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, how did you do? the boss asked his new salesman after his first day on the road. "All I got were two orders." "What were they? Anything good?" "Nope," the salesman replied. "They were ''Get out!'' and ''Stay out!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do? His mother had an idea: "Why don''t you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your apartment for a home- cooked meal?" He thought this was a great strategy, and arranged a date for a week later. His mother called the day after the big date to see how things had gone. "The evening was a disaster," he moaned. "Why, didn''t she come over?" asked his mother. "Oh, she came over, but she refused to cook...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A juggler who was driving to his next performance was stopped by the police. "What are those knives doing in your car?" asked the officer. "I juggle them in my act." "Oh yeah?" says the cop. "Let''s see you do it." So the juggler starts tossing and juggling the knives. A guy driving by sees this and says, "Wow, am I glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they''re making you do now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn''t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma''am, they''re dead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, set them on fire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Over a round of golf, two doctors were talking shop. "I operated on Mr. Lee the other day," said the surgeon. "What for?" asked his colleague. "About $17,000." "What did he have?" "Oh... About $17,000."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The door bell rings, and a man answers it. Here stands Little Johnny, dressed well but plainly, who says, "Trick or Treat!" The man asks Johnny what he''s dressed up like that for at Halloween. Little Johnny says, "I''m an IRS agent"; then he takes 28% of the man''s candy, leaves, and doesn''t say Thank You.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman answered her front door and found Little Johnny and Billy holding a list. "Lady," Johnny explained, "we''re on a scavenger hunt, and we still need three grains of wheat, a pork-chop bone and a piece of used carbon paper to earn a dollar." "Wow," the woman replied. "Who sent you on such a challenging hunt?" "Our baby-sitter''s boyfriend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother has something wrong with her brain. After medical examination, the doctor tells her: "Your brain has two parts: one is left, and the other is right. Your left side has nothing right, Your right side has nothing left."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun walks into a liquor store and asks to buy a fifth of whiskey. She says it''s for Mother Superior''s constipation, so the owner says ok. She buys the booze and leaves. Two hours later, the owner closes store and walks through the park on his way home. As he''s walking, he spots the same nun sitting on a park bench, roaring drunk. "Shame on you, Sister", he says, "I thought that whiskey was for Mother Superior''s constipation." "It is," she slurrs. "When she sees me, she''ll crap!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While on the obstacle course in bootcamp, we had to lay on a rope and pull ourselves along. When I got to the other end and got my feet on the ground I asked my M/CPL if I could do that again. When he asked me why, I retorted with, "Well I have a groove down my left nut, I would like to put a groove down my right nut so they would match up again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A soldier''s letter home: Dear Mom, I can''t tell you where i am, but yesterday I shot a polar bear. Two weeks later, another letter home: Dear Mom, I can''t tell you where I am, but yesterday i danced with a hula girl. Two weeks later another letter home: Dear Mom, I still can''t tell you where I am, but yesterday the doctor told me I should have danced with the polar bear and shot the hula girl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama''s so fat, she doesn''t need the Internet - she''s already world wide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redneck Christmas Shopping You know you''re a redneck when... you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend and only come back with one gift.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond employee calls the Help Desk to complain that there''s something wrong with her password. "The problem is that whenever I type the password, it just shows stars," she says. "Those asterisks are to protect you," the Help Desk technician explains, "so if someone were standing behind you, they wouldn''t be able to read your password." "Yeah," she says, "but they show up even when there is no one standing behind me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to the local psychic in hopes of contacting her dearly departed grandmother. The psychic''s eyelids begin fluttering, her hands float up above the table, and she begins moaning. Eventually, a coherent voice emanates saying, "Granddaughter? Are you there?" The woman, wide-eyed and on the edge of her seat, responds, "Grandmother? Is that you?" "Yes granddaughter, it''s me." "It''s really, really you, grandmother?" the woman repeats. "Yes, it''s really me, granddaughter." The woman looks puzzled, "You''re sure it''s you, grandmother?" "Yes, granddaughter, I''m sure it''s me." The woman pauses a moment, "Grandmother, I have just one question for you." "Anything, my child." "Grandmother, when did you learn to speak English?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At long last the good-humored boss was compelled to call Fisk into his office. "It has not escaped my attention," he pointed out, "that every time there''s a home game at the stadium you have to take your aunt to the doctor." "You know, you''re right, sir," exclaimed Fisk. "I didn''t realize it. You don''t suppose she''s faking it, do you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fresh out of business school, the young man answered a want ad for an accountant. Now he was being interviewed by a very nervous man who ran a small business that he had started himself. "I need someone with an accounting degree," the man said. "But mainly, I''m looking for someone to do my worrying for me." "Excuse me?" the accountant said. "I worry about a lot of things," the man said. "But I don''t want to have to worry about money. Your job will be to take all the money worries off my back." "I see," the accountant said. "And how much does the job pay?" "I''ll start you at eighty thousand." "Eighty thousand dollars!" the accountant exclaimed. "How can such a small business afford a sum like that?" "That," the owner said, "is your first worry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The day after Halloween, Little Johnny was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the 6th candybar one man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn''t good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat." Little Johnny replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old." The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?" Little Johnny answered, "No, he but he knew how to mind his own business!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister had just finished an excellent fried chicken dinner at the home of a congregation member when he saw a rooster come strutting through the yard. "That''s certainly a proud-looking rooster," the minister commented. "Yes, sir," replied the farmer. "He has reason to be proud-- one of his sons just entered the ministry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your joke is bad when.... - All the comments rated -2 or less are the ones that say they actually like it. - There AREN''T any comments at all. - People ask if you are boring in real life. - It was so "not funny", that it was actually funny. And last but not least - There are absolutly NO duplicates of your joke because it was so bad. (I wonder if I can say the same for this)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grade inflation, where assigned grades creep higher and higher, is a concern for teachers. What''s the logical limit of grade inflation? F - Student appears to be a multicellular organism. D - Student has mastered many autonomic bodily functions. C - Student can operate a writing instrument without harming self or others. B - Student is able to form a complete sentence, on the second or third try. A - Student has marginal to excellent understanding of the course material.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Girl went up to her mother and asked, "Mum, is Amsterdam a swear word?" "No, why?" She asked. "Is Rotterdam a swear word?" she asked. "No, why?" her mother repeated. "Well, I heard little sister talking behind my back after I showed her my lollipop, and she said ''I hope that that lollipop rot her damn teeth!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A visitor from Holland was chatting with his American friend and was jokingly explaining about the red, white and blue in the Netherlands flag. "Our flag symbolizes our taxes," he said. "We get red when we talk about them, white when we get our tax bill, and blue after we pay them." "That''s the same with us," the American said, "only we see stars, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, Mom, asked Johnny "Can you give me twenty dollars?" "Certainly not." "If you do," he went on, "I''ll tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop." His mother''s ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. "Well? What did he say?" "He said, ''Hey, Marie, make sure you wash my socks tomorrow.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a knock at the door. It was a small boy, about six years old. Something of his had found its way into my garage, he said, and he wanted it back. Upon opening the garage door, I noticed two additions: a baseball and a broken window sporting a baseball-sized hole. "How do you suppose this ball got in here?" I asked the boy. Taking one look at the ball, one look at the window, and one look at me, the boy exclaimed, "Wow! I must have thrown it right through that hole!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wealthy man had a falling out with his two sons. It was serious enough that he decided to change his will. At his lawyer''s office, he threw his will on the table and said, "This needs an heircut."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Turtle was walking down the road when he spotted a crow at the tip top of a very tall tree. He shouted, "Good Morning, Mr. Crow." Mr. Crow shouted back down, "Good Morning Mr. Turtle." Mr. Turtle shouted up, "Whatcha doin'' today?" and the answer shouted back down was, "Absolutely nothin'' Mr. Turtle - Absolutely nothin'' and loving it." Well, that sounded pretty good to Mr. Turtle, so he shouted back up, "Do you think I could do that too?" Mr. Crow shouted back down, "I don''t see why not!" So, Mr. Turtle lay down on the side of the road and began Doing Absolutely Nothing. In 30 minutes a fox came along and ate him. The moral of the story is: You can get away with Doing Absolutely Nothing, but only if you are really high up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Because an increasing number of people are having heart attacks while gambling, the big, high-class casinos are now equipped with sophisticated defibrillators. They are computer-controlled to deliver the exact electric shock needed to revive a heart attack victim. That is, if you''re at a big, high-class casino. At the cheaper casinos downtown, they just drag you across the carpet and touch your finger to the doorknob.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, when she walked into a store the beeper went of twice', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Doris Doris who? Door is shut thats why i knocked!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While suturing a laceration on the hand of a 73 year-old Texas rancher, whose hand had been caught in a gate while working cattle, a doctor and the old man were talking about George W. Bush being in the White House. The old Texan said, "Well, ya know, Bush is a ''post turtle.''" Not knowing what the old man meant, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was. The old man said, "When you''re driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that''s a post turtle." The old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor''s face, so he continued to explain, "You know he didn''t get there by himself, he doesn''t belong there, he doesn''t know what to do while he''s up there, and you just want to help the poor, stupid bastard get down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to his doctor and says, "Doc, I have a problem." "My girlfriend is sleeping over this Friday, my ex-wife is sleeping over this Saturday and my wife is coming home Sunday." "I need 3 Viagra pills to satisfy them all." The doctor says, "You know 3 Viagra pills 3 nights in a row is pretty dangerous for any man. I will give them to you on the condition that you return to my office on Monday so that I can check you out." The man says, "You have a deal Doc." Monday morning the man returns with his arm in a sling. The doctor asks, "What happened"? The man answered, "Nobody showed up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The newlywed wife said to her husband when he returned from work, "I have great news for you. Pretty soon, we''re going to be three in this house instead of two." Her husband ran to her with a smile on his face and delight in his eyes. He was glowing of happiness and kissing his wife when she said, "I''m glad that you feel this way since tomorrow morning, my mother moves in with us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The two thousand member Baptist church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The preacher was ready to start the sermon when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered through the rear of the church. One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed at the back of the church. They both then reached under their coats and with drew automatic weapons. The one in the middle announced, "Everyone willing to take a bullet for Jesus stay in your seats!" Naturally, the pews emptied, followed by the chorus. The deacons ran out the door, followed by the chorus director and the assistant pastor. After a few moments, there were about twenty people left sitting in the church. The preacher was holding steady in the pulpit. The men put their weapons away and said, gently, to the preacher, "All right, pastor, the hypocrites are gone now. You may begin the service."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some times when the soap bar in the shower is small enough I like to swipe it thru my butt crack and say " beep! credit card accepted"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Amy was reading a newspaper while her husband was engrossed in a game on TV. Suddenly, she burst out laughing. "Listen to this, there''s a classified ad here where a guy is offering to swap his wife for a season tickets." "Hmmm," her husband said, not bothering to look away from the game. Amy said teasingly, "Would you swap me for season tickets?" "Absolutely not," he said, "season''s more than half over."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The landlady asked me if I minded making my own bed. I said I didn''t and she said great there''s a hammer and nails in the corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife has not spoken to me in three days. I think it has something to do with what happened on Sunday night when she thought she heard a noise downstairs. She nudged me and whispered, "Wake up, wake up!" "What''s the matter?" I asked. "There are burglars in the kitchen. I think they''re eating the tuna casserole I made tonight." "That''ll teach them!" I replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The religious cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range. Three weeks later a cow walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. The cowboy couldn''t believe his eyes. He took the precious book out of the cow''s mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, "It''s a miracle!" "Not really," said the cow. "Your name is written inside the cover."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An older gentleman had an appointment to see the urologist who shared an office with several other doctors. The waiting room was filled with patients. As he approached the receptionist desk he noticed that the receptionist was a large unfriendly woman who looked like a Sumo wrestler. He gave her his name. In a very loud voice, the receptionist said, "YES, I HAVE YOUR NAME HERE; YOU WANT TO SEE THE DOCTOR ABOUT IMPOTENCE, RIGHT?" All the patients in the waiting room snapped their heads around to look at the very embarrassed man. He recovered quickly, and in an equally loud voice replied, "NO, I''VE COME TO INQUIRE ABOUT A SEX CHANGE OPERATION, BUT I DON''T WANT THE SAME DOCTOR THAT DID YOURS."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? Pregnant! Why did the blonde die in the helecopter crash? She got cold so she turned off the fan! How did the blonde die ice fishing? She got ran over by the zamboni machine! ( Zambonis make the ice on skating rinks) How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves? She fell out of the tree! A blonde was taking a walk outside when a bird flew over her in the sky. When it suddenly dropped a load on her. What did she say? Good thing my mouth was open or it would''ve hit me in the face!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the brakes want to work? Because it was time for their lunch break.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friendships between women: A woman didn''t come home one night. The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend''s house. The man called his wife''s 10 best friends. None of them knew about it. Friendships between men: A man didn''t come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend''s house. The woman called her husband''s 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that yes, he had slept over and two claimed that he was still there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Upon realizing that we both had the same middle name, I told the blond, "Hey we have the same middle name!" She replied, "Really? What''s yours?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between girls aged: 8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58, 68 and 78? At 8 - You take her to bed and tell her a story. At 18 - You tell her a story and take her to bed. At 28 - You don''t need to tell her a story to take her to bed. At 38 - She tells you a story and takes you to bed. At 48 - You tell her a story to avoid going to bed. At 58 - You stay in bed to avoid her story. At 68 - If you take her to bed, that''ll be a story. At 78 - You can get out of bed, that''s another story.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was on a walking holiday in a foreign country. He became thirsty so decided to ask at a stranger''s home for something to drink. The lady of the house invited him in and served him a bowl of soup by the fire. There was a wee pig running around the kitchen - running up to the visitor and giving him a great deal of attention. The visitor commented that he had never seen a pig this friendly. The housewife replied: "Ummm, he''s not that friendly. That''s his bowl you''re using"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last week my wife and I purchased a new computer. We ran into some difficulties while setting it up so we called the customer support phone number we found in the manual. I picked up the phone and called the number. A man answered the phone and I explained the problem to him. He began rattling off computer jargon. This confused us even more. "Sir," I said politely, "Can you explain what I should do as if I were a small child?" "Okay," the computer support guy said, "Son, could you please put your mommy on the phone?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a posh Manhattan dinner party, a Latin American visitor was telling the guests about this home country and himself. As he concluded, he said, "And I have a charming and understanding wife but, alas, no children." As his listeners appeared to be waiting for him to continue, he said, haltingly, "You see, my wife is unbearable." Puzzled glances prompted him to try to clarify the matter: "What I mean is, my wife is inconceivable." As his companions seemed amused, he floundered deeper into the intricacies of the English language, explaining triumphantly, "That is, my wife, she is impregnable!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last summer, my husband, Bill, took me camping for the first time. At every opportunity, he passed along outdoor-survival lore. One day we got lost hiking in the deep woods. Bill tried the usual tactics to determine direction - moss on the trees (there was no moss), direction of the sun (it was an overcast day). Just as I was beginning to panic, he spotted a small cabin off in the distance. Bill pulled out his binoculars, studied the cabin, turned and led us right back to our camp. "That was terrific," I said. "How did you do it?" "Simple," he replied. "In this part of the country all TV satellite dishes point south."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After a trial had been going on for three days, Finally, the blonde accused of committing the crimes, stood up and approached the judge''s bench. "Your Honor, I would like to change my plea from ''not guilty'' to ''guilty'' of the charges." The judge angrily banged his fist on the desk. "If you''re guilty, why didn''t you say so in the first place and save this court a lot of time and inconvenience?" he demanded. The blonde looked up wide-eyed and stated, "Well, when the trial started I thought I was innocent, but that was before I heard all the evidence against me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was on vacation in Texas, and was appalled by Dallas'' chaotic traffic. I asked the bellhop at the hotel why it was so disorderly and was told, "In some countries they drive on the right, in others on the left. Here we drive in the shade."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I were traveling on the Kansas Turnpike, bucking a 30 to 45 m.p.h. crosswind. At the tollbooth, I asked the attendant, "What do you people do in Kansas when the wind quits?" The tollbooth attendant didn''t miss a beat. She answered, "We take the rocks out of our pockets."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They have finally started practicing safe sex in Scotland... They now paint red X''s on the sheep that kick', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mom, Bri, and a son, Jorge, were eating dinner at the dinner table. Jorge pushes his plate away and says, "I''m done." Bri glances at Jorge''s plate and notices he still has a pile of peas on it, "No you don''t. Not untill you eat all of your food." "I don''t like peas." "They are not peas they are green M&M''s but the trick is you can''t taste the candy untill you swallow them." Jorge gets excited and sticks a spoon full of peas in his mouth. Then he grabs his glass of milk and takes a drink. Jorge says, "your right mom they do taste like M&M''s. Why don''t you try?" "Who do you think you''re kidding?," replies Bri and gives Jorge a sly look. "Who do YOU think you''re kidding?," Jorge says grabbing his glass of milk and pouring the peas out of it onto his plate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she walks she creates hurricanes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok here are a few: I will try to be nicer if you try to be smarter. Don''t flatter yourself. I was looking at your friend. I don''t know what makes you so dumb, but it''s really working. Stupidity is not a crime, so you are free to go. If I throw a stick, will you go away? Warning: I am hearing voices and they don''t like you. Stupidity is a right but you are abusing the privilege. Your mouth keeps moving but all I hear is bla, bla, bla. On your mark, get set, go away. I would like to help you out. Which way did you come in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy: I''m having a problem with it. Girl: That''s not surprising, it''s very hard when you first learn. Guy: It''s not working. I can''t get it up. Girl: You just have to relax. It''ll happen. You just have to work at it. Guy: Alright, I''m supposed to do what with my tongue again?? Girl: Your tongue is the key, you have to use it like a tool. You have to know where to put your tongue where it''s needed. Feel for problem areas. Guy: pbpbpbpb. man. this sucks. Girl: Try again. just go slower. Guy: Its too hard! Girl: Soften it up. Guy: Show me again? Girl: *shows him* Guy: Alright, let me try now. Girl: Your first time is an experience you''ll always remember. I know you can do it! Guy: *tries again* pbpbpbb sssssssssss.... *POP!* Girl: You did it! Guy: Yea... learning to blow bubbles with bubble gum is too hard, I''ll stick with lollipops, thanks. Girl: Still, I knew you could do it! *Duh! What''d you think they were doing?!*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the melon jump into the water? Because it wanted to be a watermelon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is the difference between guts and balls. Guts is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to just "be there." Balls is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, "You''re next."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the penny jump off the cliff and not the quarter? Because the quarter had more cents!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Six is afraid of Seven because Seven ate (Eight) Nine, why did Six soon die? Because Six, Seven ate (Eight) (678)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story: A man was in a grocery store shopping, when he lit a cigarette. The manager walks up to him and politely asks him to extinguish it. The man refuses, saying " Well you sell cigarettes here, dont you?" The store manager replies " Yes sir we do, and we also sell condoms." The man quickly put the cigarette out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman rushes to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off, "Doctor, take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were blood-shot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What''s wrong with me, Doctor?" The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says, "Well, I can tell you one thing . . . there ain''t nothing wrong with your eyesight."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny: "Dad, stop drinking my root beer!!! Do I get free refills?" Dad: "Sure -- I backwashed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is that a mirror in your jeans? Because I can see myself in them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When you fell from heaven. Girl: Aww, did it hurt when you got kicked out of hell? Boy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. Girl: Really? If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put F and U together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why cant blondes make ice cubes? Because they dont have the recipe! 2 Two Blondes were in a car and came to a fork in a road, and the sign said Disneyland left. So they turned around and went home. 3 How do you know when a blonde''s been sending e-mail? Envelopes in the disk drive. 4 How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her a blonde joke. 5 Why don''t Blondes make good cattle ranchers? They can''t keep their calves together.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why did the blonde cross the road? She was tied to the baby that was stapled to the chicken. 2 Why did the blonde take a right into the ditch? Her blinker was on 3 What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde''s ear ? Data transfer. 4 What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are some cute things kids thought up when asked to write about the moon (all the spelling mistakes are original!) The moon is a saterlight. A long time ago a big object hit the Moon and some of the moon fell off. If u look through a telliscope you can see big holes. There are big montines on the moon just like on Earth - they are some of the left-overs of the Moon in big lumps Neil Armstrong was the first person to step on the Moon. He had weights in his boots so he wouldn''t fall off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do starving Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common? They are both living off dead Beatles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has all of these funny little lines all over the screen. A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I turn my Etch-A-Sketch off? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: What''s the shortcut for Undo? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I create a New Document window? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I set the background and foreground to the same color? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: What is the proper procedure for rebooting my Etch-A-Sketch? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I delete a document on my Etch-A-Sketch? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I save my Etch-A-Sketch document? A: Don''t shake it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What''s the advantage of having a blonde as a girlfriend? You get to park in handicapped zones. 2 What do you call a blonde in a leather jacket? A rebel without a clue. 3 Why did God give blondes 2% more brains than horses? So they don''t crap on the street during parades!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde got lost in her car in a snowstorm. She remembered what her dad had once told her. ''''If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, wait for a snow plow and follow it.'''' Pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it. She followed the plow for about 45 minutes. Finally, the driver of the truck got out and asked her what she was doing. She explained that her dad had told her if she ever got stuck in the snow, to follow a plow. The driver nodded and said, ''''Well, I''m done with the parking lot here at Wal-Mart, now you can follow me over to K-Mart.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was this little girl''s first day of school and the teacher asked her what her name was and she replied, "Happy Butt." The teacher said, "Honey I don''t think that''s your name you need to go to the principal''s office and get this straightened out." So she went to the principal''s office and he asked, "What''s your name?" And the little girl said, "Happy Butt." The principal called the girl''s mother to get this straightened out once and for all. After getting off the phone he looked at the little girl and said, "Honey, your name''s is Gladys, not Happy Butt." The girl then exclaimed, "Glad Ass, Happy Butt what''s the difference?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a mouth without any teeth?- Grandma', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If men and women had buttons, a man''s button panel would look like... A vacuum - "On" and "Off" switch A woman''s panel would look like... An airplane. So many buttons...ahhh...where''s the mute?!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MISSION: GO TO GAP, BUY A PAIR OF PANTS Male Time: 6 min Cost: $33 Mission accomplished? Yes Extra stops: None Female Time: 3 hours 26 min Cost: $876 Mission accomplished? No Extra stops: Macy''s, JC Penny, Sears...etc...etc...etc...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chances of a Man Winning an Argument: Dating: 50% Engagement: 25% Marriage Period: 0%, very rare', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Most people worry about getting AIDS from sex. Bill Clinton worries about getting sex from aides.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear Bill Clinton gave up playing his sax-a-phone? He now plays his whore-monica.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Clinton wants a postage stamp issued in his image? So he gets licked more often.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Monica Lewinsky in the White House after hours? Clinton was showing her the proper way to take "dic"tation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the new name for the place where Bill Clinton does his business? The Oral Office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does Monica Lewinsky have on her resume? "Sat on the Presidential Staff"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does President Clinton invite so many ladies into his private study? He wants to show them his executive branch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Bill Clinton''s favorite movie ? Sex lies and video tape', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Bill''s definition of safe sex? When Hillary is out of town.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does Clinton divert his attention from the latest controversy? He just keeps on plugging away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What goes clop... clop... clop... BANG! clop clop clop clop clop clop? A. An Amish driveby', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a blond, Blond? Isn''t it obvious? They''re dumb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m the kind of person who laughs at a joke three times: Once it''s told, once it''s explained, and 5 minutes later once I get it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke''s so old, it has mold on it! HA HA HA!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s pretty bad if you start typing "lol" as if it were a sentence (Lol.) Its worse if you start saying, "laugh out loud" in everday conversations. It''s absolutely horrible if you actually say, "l-o-l."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not all lawyers are bad. I''ve seen some graveyards full of good ones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a kangaroo''s favorite restaurant? IHOP!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang a picture of Jesus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? Tell her a joke on Wednesday. 2 What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears? Trying to hold on to a thought. 3 Why don''t blondes have elevator jobs? They don''t know the route. 4 Have you heard what my blond neighbor wrote on the bottom of her swimming pool? No smoking. 5 How do you drive a blonde crazy? Give her a bag of M&Ms and tell her to alphabetize them. 6 Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out the W''s. 7 How did the blonde die drinking milk? The cow fell on her. 8 Why do blondes like lightning? They think someone is taking their picture. 9 Why don''t blondes make good pharmacists? They can''t get the bottle into the typewriter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:After a runner reached the end of a long, gruelling marathon, officials were amazed to see him continue to run. Why did he do this? A:The man was let out of prison for the day to enter the marathon. He kept on running to avoid prison.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One year, a particular harried husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, he didn''t buy her a gift. When she asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven''t used the gift I bought you last year!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends, Al and Mike, were walking through the woods, when suddenly a snake jumped up and bit Mike on the penis. He was quickly down on the ground writhing in pain, so Al yelled,"Wait here while I run and get help!" So Al runs into town, gets to the doctors office, and tells him what happened. The doctor tells him he cannot leave the office, but told Al he would need to bite open the wound and suck out all of the venom. Al runs back into the woods, and finds Mike still writhing in pain. "What did the doctor say?" asked Mike. And Al told him, "The doctor says you''re gonna die!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hate thongs! I mean, come on, Women don''t need to floss their butts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('War not determine who right, war determine who left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the name of a naked woman lying between two naked men? Sharin Peters', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Stew Stew who? Stew cold out here, let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('IF I LOST A DOLLAR FOR EVERY BRAIN YOU HAVE, I WOULD BE IN DEBT', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which animals eat with their ears? All of them, since no animal takes its ears off to eat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do you call a blonde with ESP and PMS? A know-it-all bitch. 2 I told my blonde girlfriend that I was going skeet shooting. She told me she didn''t know how to cook them. 3 Did you hear about the blonde who was M.D. (mentallY deficient) 4 Why is it okay for blondes to catch cold? They don''t have to worry about blowing their brains out. 5 What''s five miles long and has an IQ of forty? A blonde parade.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do you call five blondes at the bottom of the pool? Air bubbles! 2 What do you call 4 blondes lying on the ground? An air mattress. 3 What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home? She moved. 4 What are the worst six years in a blonde''s life? Third Grade. 5 Why did the blonde want to become a veterinarian? Because she loved children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why did God create brunettes? So ugly men wouldn''t feel left out 2 Why do brunettes like their dark hair color? It doesn''t show the dirt 3 Why are brunettes so proud of their hair? It matches their mustache. 4 What do brunettes miss most about a great party? The invitation. 5 What do you call a good-looking man with a brunette? Gay, married, or a hostage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('here is a link to the joke http://miamistreetracing.com/forum/v...d.php?tid=2385', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma is so fat she never wakes up on the wrong side of the bed; she wakes up on EVERY side of the bed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn''t paying attention in class. She called on him and said, "Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?" Little Johnny quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 JACK AND JILL Went up the hill To have a little fun. Stupid Jill forgot the pill And now they have a son. 2 MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB Her father shot it dead. Now it goes to school with her, Between two hunks of bread. 3 HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the kings'' horses, And all the kings'' men. Had scrambled eggs, For breakfast again. 4 HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle, All over the bedside clock. The little dog laughed to see such fun. Then died of electric shock. 5 There was a little girl who had a little curl Right in the middle of her forehead. When she was good, she was very, very good. But when she was bad........ She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What is the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot? Bigfoot has been spotted. 2 How do you drown a blonde? Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool. 3 What''s the blonde''s cheer? "I''m blonde, I''m blonde, I''m B.L.O.N....ah, oh well... 4 What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts? Change. 5 How does a blonde moonwalk? She pulls down her panties and slides her butt along the floor!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do you get when you cross a blonde and a gorilla? Who knows, there is only so much a gorilla can be forced to do. 2 Why does a blonde only change her baby''s diapers every month? Because it says on it "good for up to 20 pounds." 3 Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months? Because on the box it said From 2-4 years. 4 What do you say to a blonde with no arms and no legs? "Nice boobs!" 5 How does a blonde high-5? She smacks herself in the forehead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde''s head? A Space Invader. 2 What''s a blondes'' favorite rock group? Air Supply. 3 What do you see when you look into a blonde''s eyes? The back of her head. 4 Why do blondes have see-through lunch box lids? So that when they''re on the train they can tell if they''re going to work or coming home. 5 What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why are blondes hurt by people''s words? Because people keep hitting them with dictionaries. 2 What''s the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley? The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own. 3 What do you call a blonde behind a steering wheel? An air bag. 4 Did you hear about the blonde coyote? Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck. 5 Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver''s License? Because she got an F in sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Found on Roadside Dead Fucked Over Re-built Dodge', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma jokes are so stupid, I barf everytime I see one!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build weapons and Civil Engineers build targets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer; just look at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." The last one said, "Actually, it was a civil engineer. I mean, who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Normal people believe that "If it ain''t broke, don''t fix it." Engineers believe that "If it ain''t broke, it doesn''t have enough features yet"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A hiker gets lost in the woods and spends the next two days wandering around with no food. Finally, he spots a bald eagle on a ledge, hits it with a big rock, and begins eating it raw. A park ranger stumbles on the scene and arrests the hiker for killing an endangered species. In court the hiker explains that he was on the edge of starvation and had no choice. "Considering the circumstances, I find you not guilty," says the judge. "But I have to askwhat did the eagle taste like?" "Well, your honor," the hiker says, "it tasted like a cross between a whooping crane and a spotted owl."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Signs in our world... Please be safe. Do not stand, sit, climb or lean on zoo fences. If you fall, animals could eat you and that might make them sick. Thank you. OUR AIM IS TO KEEP THIS BATHROOM CLEAN. GENTLEMEN: Your aim will help. Stand closer. It''s shorter than you think. LADIES: Please remain seated for the entire performance. CAUTION: This machine has no brain. Use your own. St. Cyril of Alexandria Catholic Church Staying in bed shouting, Oh, God! does not constitute going to church. Diocese of Galveston-Houston. Stiff Nipples Air Conditioning Service. 020 8797 2690 Note to NiteLink Passengers. Ladies, the poles are fitted for your safety. No dancing. Attention Dog Guardians: Pick up after your dogs. Thank you. Attention Dogs: Grrrr, bark, woof. Good dog. Mr. Toskana has had an expensive divorce and now needs the money, so SALE NOW ON!! PLEASE Don''t throw your cigarette butts on the floor. The cockroaches are getting cancer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old photographers never die, they just go out of focus!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the blonde go on the amusement park ride? Because he was too tall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer? A. The joystick is wet. Q. Why do blondes wear underwear? A. To keep their ankles warm. Q. What is a brunette between two blondes? A. An interpreter. Q. What''s the difference between a blonde and a brick? A. The brick doesn''t follow you home after you lay it. Q. Did you hear about the blonde that needed gas money? A. She sold her car for it.. Q. What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? A. "Are you sure it''s mine?" Q. Why do blondes have bruised belly buttons? A. Because they have blond boyfriends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? A. Their both empty from the neck up. Q. What do you call a blonde with pig tails? A. A blow job with handlebars. Q. What do you call a blond with a brain? A. A golden retriever. Q. What do you call a blonde in the closet? A. The 1984 hide and go seek champion. Q. How can you tell that a blonde sent you a fax? A. It has a stamp on it. Q. What do you call a room full of blondes with PMS and yeast infections? A. A wine and cheese party! Q. How do you drown a blonde? A. Put a scratch ''n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool. Q. Hear about the blonde that bought an AM radio? A. It took her a month to figure out she could play it at night too. Q. What did the blonde say when she saw the banana peel on the floor? A. Oh no, I''m going to fall again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma so stupid, she wanted to go on a roller coaster and looked at the height, and she was too tall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid is holding a conversation with a talking dog. "Why do you poop in people''s yards?" asks the little kid. "We''ve learned to sit and we''ve learned to stay," said the dog. "We''ve learned to lay down, roll over, and play dead. People taught us the ''No'' command, the ''Heel'' command, and even the ''Shake Paws'' command. But nobody ever thought to teach us the ''GET THE F*** OUT OF MY YAAAARD!!!!'' command!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock GO AWAY!!! WE DON''T WANT ANY!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t think of yourself as an ugly person, think of yourself as a really pretty monkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was everyone at the fancy King Crab Night Diner arrested? They were breaking the claw! So punny!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the quickest way to a woman''s heart? Through her left breast.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What can you sit on, sleep on, and brush your teeth with? A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, two women and a man die. When they go to heaven, St. Peter tells them they could do whatever they want as long as they didn''t step on a pink cloud. One day, one of the three people were seen walking with two ugly men. "I tripped and fell on a pink cloud," she explained, "then **POOF** here he was." The next day, the other woman was seen walking with an even uglier guy! She said, "I was pushed onto a pink cloud. Then **POOF** here was this gross guy." A few days later, the two women, and their ugly men, saw the guy that had died walking with a gorgeous woman. They asked him what happened. He said, "Oh, she stepped on a pink cloud."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s a Polar Bear''s favorite cereal? A: Ice Krispies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a circus and congress have in common? They are both full of CLOWNS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so scary, she scares Michael Jackson!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the best way to talk to a shark? Long distance!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill was fixing a door and he found that he needed a new hinge, so he sent his wife Mary to the hardware store. At the hardware store, Mary saw a beautiful teapot on a top shelf while she was waiting for Carl, the manager, to finish waiting on a customer. When Carl was finished, Mary asked how much for the teapot. Carl replied, "That''s silver and it costs $100! "My goodness, that sure is a lotta money!" Mary exclaimed. Then she proceeded to describe the hinge that Bill had sent her to buy, and Carl went to the back room to find it. From the back room Carl yelled, "Mary, you wanna screw for that hinge?" Mary replied, "No, but I will for the teapot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a depressed crocodile decides to see his doctor about his problems. He says, "Doc, I''m not sure what''s wrong with me. I don''t feel like killing people anymore. I don''t like attacking them, I don''t like wrestling them in the water, and I definitely don''t like eating them." The doctor goes over to his medicine cabinet, and pulls out several tiny blue pills. In amazement, the crocodile asks his doctor, "Doc, are those what I think they are?" The doctor replies, "Yes, I''m prescribing you some Viagra." Frustrated, the crocodile tells his doctor, "I''m not sure you understand -- have you been listening to a word I''ve said?" The doctor replies, "Of course I''ve been listening, you said you had a reptile dysfunction!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife are dining at a table in a plush restaurant, and the husband keeps staring at an old drunken lady swigging her gin as she sits alone at a nearby table. Finally the wife asks, "Do you know her?" "Yes," sighs the husband, "She''s my ex-wife. She took to drinking right after we divorced seven years ago, and I hear she hasn''t been sober since." "My God!" says the wife, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so nasty she''s got to pour sand down her pants to keep the crabs happy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Dick Cheney say before he shot his hunting companion? Ready, Fire, Aim!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an intelligent, good looking man? A: A rumor!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a handcuffed man? A: Trustworthy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock? Who''s There? Ice Cream. Ice Cream who? I scream for Ice Cream!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where do spiders go to learn new words? A: WEB-sters dictionary!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the poor dog chase his tail? He was trying to make ends meet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever walk into a room and forget what you came in for? Well, that''s probably how dogs spend most of their lives...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s like a cell phone: Free on nights and weekends!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mamma is like a shot gun: One cock and shes ready to blow!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George Bush to friend: Sorry I forgot your birthday. Dick Cheney forgot to put it on my to-do list.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boys are like public toilets; they''re either taken, or full of crap. (no offense to you boys)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two good ole boys down in Alabama were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer...After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd, "If''n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday & make love to your wife while you was off huntin'', and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us kin?" The 2nd guy crooked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head, and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question. Finally, he says, "Well, I don''t know about kin, but it sure would make us even."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up. 2. Grandchildren are God''s reward for not killing your own children. 3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young. 4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn''t have said. 5. The main purpose of holding children''s parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own. 6. We childproofed our homes but they are still getting in. ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day. AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: "TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man''s wife was in labor with their first child. Things were going pretty well when suddenly the man''s wife began to shout, "Shouldn''t, couldn''t wouldn''t, didn''t, can''t!!" The man said,"Doctor, what''s wrong with my wife?!" The doctor replied, "Nothing. She''s just having contractions."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why isn''t there a pro football team in Flint, Michigan? A: Because then Detroit would want one too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid and so fat that when she stepped on the scale and saw three 7s, she thought she won the jackpot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb when she got locked in the matress king she slept on the floor', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a red head and a brunette are all skateboarding and bragging about their best tricks. The brunette says, "I can do a double impossible and a misty." The red head says, "Thats nothing. I can do a 1080 flip off a quarter pipe, then do a double double and land it without falling". Then the blonde says, "I dont know what the big deal is with all of you guys, I can do all those with no hands!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('your daddies so old, i slapped his butt and his balls fell off', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SAY IT REALLY FAST SAY*PINK CHEESE GREEN GHOST* FAST IF UR A TRUE LATINO YOULL GET WAT THIS MEANS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why are black people so good at basket ball? because they can Run, shoot and steal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she uses a rocket ship as a dildo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be redneck if you''ve totaled every car you''ve owned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you answer to more than one nickname.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you have orange road cones in your living room!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your toenail clippers say craftsman on the side!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve never stayed in a hotel without stealing something', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve ever videotaped a dog loving on someone''s leg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You take me out way too much!!! Do you think this dress makes me look too slim? You looked stressed out, let me give you a massage. Go out with your friends tonight, you deserve it. That Pamala Anderson has a lovely body. No, no you buy me too much already. A fake diamond will do. My mother is a real old wench. What headache?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We have found the perfect mate for all of you ladies out there. This mate... will always stop watching t.v. and cuddle with you without expecting something in return. Is always happy to hear about your day when you get home. Never complains about your cooking, or lack of. Never gets mad when you roll over in bed and say you''re too tired. Never yells back at you when you are having a mood swing due to pms. Finally ladies here is your perfect mate.... A PUPPY!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It can buy a bed - but not sleep It can buy a clock - but not time It can buy you a book - but not knowledge It can buy you a position - but not respect It can buy you medicine - but not health It can buy you blood - but not life So you see, money isn''t everything, and it often causes pain and suffering. I tell you all this because I am your friend, and as your friend I want to take away your pain and suffering....... So send me all your money and I will suffer for you!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the squirrel cross the road? Because it was NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There Is an old lady who lives in a 14 story hotel. She lives on the 14th floor. Every morning, she goes down into the lobby, gets cereal and goes on a walk. On mornings when it is raining, she uses the elevator all of the way up to get to her room after she goes on her walk. On mornings when it is not raining after she''s eaten, she only goes to floor 7 and then uses the stairs to walk the rest of the way up. Why? Because she is a midget. On mornings when it is raining, she has her umbrella to go on the walk so she can use the umbrella to touch the top button in the elevator. When it isnt raining, she doesn''t have her umbrella and she can only reach the button for floor 7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blind guy, walking down the street. He passes a fish market, smells the fish and says," Good morning ladies."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What amimal walks with its feet on its head? a flea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the rooster cross the road? To fuck the chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the elephant cross the road? Because the chiken retired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she sat on the tv and watched the couch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks in to the Barbershop. Barber says, "What will it be today?" Guy says, "Well, I want it going with my waves on top, faded on one side, plug the other, and just make it all out of shape and messed up." Barber says, "Now why in the world do you want your hair cut like that?" Guy says, "That''s how you cut it last time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she was runing in the street with a yellow raincoat and the kids thougth they mised the bus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Tigger smell so bad? Cause he''s always hanging out with Pooh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a guy who didn''t know which train station would take him to L.A. So, he asked a guy nearby,"What train takes me to L.A? The left, or right train?" The answer was, "If you go to the right one, you''ll be left and if you go to the left one, you''ll be right."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother-in-law was a gay minister, so when his sister wanted a small, casual wedding, she asked him to officiate. He had never performed a marriage ceremony before, so he decided to ask his pastor for advice. "My sister has asked me to marry her," he began, "and I''m not sure what I should do." The minister answered, "Try telling her you just want to be friends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once i bought a squirrel and I named it Melinda, and then I gave it food and then it died! Now I have a box named Joice Ann and I gave it some water and it fell down and then it died!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a man wear two pairs of pants when he goes golfing? He might get a hole in one!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people say "This is the first day of the rest of your life"? Isn''t that true about everyday unless you die that day?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boys are like diapers.... Always on my ass and full of shit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what do you get when you cross a LAWYER and a LIBRARIAN? All the information you want, but you can''t understand it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady one day decides to place an ad for a good relationship in bed. she said muct not have hands to beat her, must not have feet to walk on her and must be good in bed. one day, the doorbell rang and she answered it. a man with no legs, or hands is there and says " Are u from the ad" she says yeah. she says then " You have no hands so u cant beat me, you have no feet so you wont walk over me, but tell me this... are u good in bed"? he replies "How do u think i rang the doorbell"?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once I like bought a fox and I like named him Jorge and like he died and I cried so I bought shoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once I went to visit my cousin in Jersey and I was looking for his house and when I found his house I rang the doorbell and like I said, "Hey cuz" and he answered I''m not your cousin. Then I said, "Yes I am, and then he closes the door on me. So I like call my mom, right? Then I like say, "Mom, my cousin says he''s not my cousin." Then my mom says, "You don''t have a cousin in Jersey." And I''m like, "Oh cool", and then I got a fox.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde with a green stripe in her hair, walked into a barbor shop. The barbor asks where the brunette got the haircolor. She replies "Natural." He asks the red-head the same. She says, "Natural." Then he asks the blonde the same question, and she rubs the back of her hand over her nose, and on the green stripe, and says "Natural."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blond College Exam HINT: this is an exam 1.Spell yes 2.spell no 3. what is 0-0 ANSWER:0 4. answer yes to this question 5. are you human 6. what did you answer #4 HINT: #=number 7. what number is this 8. is this an exam a):yes b);yes 9. spell your name 10. leave this one blank 11. write an aswser 12. check your email 13. repeat 14.eat. 15. turn in paper REQUIREMENTS:Do #15 all others might be wrong IF YOU MET THE REQUIREMENTS, YOU NOW HAVE A SCHOLARSHIP TO HARVORD FOR (4) BLONDS ANSWERS 1. yes 2. no 3. 0 4. yes 5. yes 6. yes 7. 7 8. circle 9. sexy 10. 11. 9 12 he likes me 13. he doesn''t 14. eggs 15. 15. 15.HEY BLONDY GO DIE NOTE: noone has ever passed test', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns telling their adventures on the seas. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch. Curious, the seaman asks "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?" The pirate replies "I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off". "Wow!" said the seaman. "What about the hook"? "Well...", replied the pirate, "We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemies cut my hand clean off." "Incredible!" remarked the seaman. "How did you get the eye patch"? "A seagull dropping fell into my eye," replied the pirate. "You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?" the sailor asked. "Well..." said the pirate, "That was my first day with the hook."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three friends a surgeon, an engineer, and a politician were discussing which of their professions was the oldest. The surgeon said "Eve was created from Adam''s rib, a surgical procedure." The engineer replied: "Before Adam and Eve, order was created out of chaos, and that was an engineering job." The politician said, "Yes, but who do you suppose created the chaos?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three college professors were driving down the highway at a very slow speed. A policeman pulled them over and explained that driving so slowly on the highway could be hazardous. The driver pointed out the sign that read "20." He explained that he was going 20 mph because of the sign. The policeman pointed out that the sign indicated they were driving on Highway 20. Somewhat embarrassed the professor apologized and promised to be more observant. As the policeman turned to walk back to his car, he noticed the other two professors on the floor ...looking scared to death! He asked the driver, "What''s wrong with them?" The driver replied, "We just turned off Highway 105."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a guy who lived in a blue, one story house. EVERYTHING in the house was blue. The refridgerator, all of the food, the tables, the chairs, the clothes of the man, the TV, the camera, the dishwasher, the washing machine, and even the man himself. What color were the stairs? Suspected Answer: Blue Real Answer: There were no stairs!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('when your mom whent to China people would say "Run it''s Godzilla!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so fat when she hugs people they get lost!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you say when you see a group full of black people? A: Where is the cream filling?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do alot of people go to black peoples yard sales? A:To get there stuff back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid she got locked up in the bathroom and she peed in her pants!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, when she went in a hot air balloon there was a solar eclipse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if your fence doubles as your clothesline', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if you have season tickets for the tractor pull.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if you would rather your son have his own hunting show than become a doctor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if a city night on the town includes city jail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if your bathroom towels are also your bathroom curtains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You may be a redneck if your burglar alarm is a vacuum cleaner plugged into a motion detector.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve ever watched a tornado from a lawn chair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck if you paint your garage with a paintball gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve ever been fired for shooting spitballs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scientists gathered three musicians together and asked them to name the greatest invention of the 20th century. The guitarist said the "wah-wah pedal" was the greatest invention. After that, they asked the drummer and he said the "bass pedal" was the greatest invention. Then finally, when asking the bass player, he said the "Stanley thermos" was the greatest invention. Confused, they asked him how he figured that, and he said: "Hot or cold how does it know, HOW DOES IT KNOW!?!?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At last. A bumper sticker for both parties. FINALLY, Someone has come out with a 100% bipartisan political bumper sticker. This hot selling bumper sticker comes from the great state of New York! "RUN HILLARY RUN" Democrats put it on the rear bumper. Republicans put it on the front bumper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde buys a thermos. Two days later, she''s back in the shop and wants a refund. The sales person asks her why she''s returning it. She replies, "Well, when I bought it, you said it would keep hot things hot and cold things cold, but yesterday I took some coffee and ice-cream to work for after lunch, and all that came out was a luke-warm slush!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black guy and a white guy having sex? mixed nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a nun''s urine? Virgin Lemonade', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she makes the sun look like a pebble!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so nasty, when she burped she started a nuclear war!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to Make Cookies: 1. Make the batter with everything but the vanilla. 2. Walk to your nearest appliance shop. 3. Buy a telephone and walk home. 4. Call a friend. 5. Have her drive you to the airport. 6. Buy a plane ticket to St. Louis MO, USA (home is where the heart is). 7. Walk to a little shop and buy a little measuring cup. 8. Walk back to the airport (I hope you have good shoes, it might be a long walk). 9. Catch a plane home. 10. Measure the vanilla. WAIT! You''re a TSP. short... 11. Call your friand back, have her drive you to the airport again... 12. Buy vanilla.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are opera singers and sailors alike? They both have to handle the high seas(Cs)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A plane was flying from New York to Canada. The plane crashes right on the border line. Where do you burry the survivors? They don''t because they are survivors, therefor they never died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, she filled up the tub before she put the water in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING: Racial insult to a black person. Why could a black person never get oral sex? Because the black person would taste like horribly burned food.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On Halloween night a kid is standing on a bench with a fake beard, fake fangs, a tennis racket, a baseball cap, and a purple cape. A snobby man walks by and says, "What are you supposed to be?" The kid says, "Duh! I''m a kid standing on a bench wearing fake fangs, a fake beard, a baseball cap, a purple cape and holding a tennis racket! What did you think I was?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy was in a bookstore with his dad. They were browsing for books when the little kid said,"You know American Idol?" His dad said, "Yeah." The kid then said, "If they win, they''ll become poptarts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 What do blondes and cow pies have in common? The older they get, the easier they are to pick up. 2 What did the blonde do when her doctor told her she had sugar in her urine? She peed on her corn flakes. 3 What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency? She turned it over and used the other side. 4 Did you hear about the stupid blonde? She got hit by a parked car. 5 Why can''t the blonde add 10 and 7 on a calculator? Because she can''t find the 10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What device lets you see through a wall? A: Window', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) What do you say to a Blonde that won''t give in? "Have another beer." 2) What''s the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator? The blonde works in the dark! 3) How do you keep a blonde busy for hours? Scroll down... Scroll up... 4) So a blonde is walking down the street and she stops to ask a man the time, he says "O, it''s uhh...4:45." The blonde responds, "Man, I''ve been asking that question all day and I get a different answer every time! 5) Superman, Batman, and a smart blonde all died on the same day.Which one got to Heaven first? None of them.They are all make-believe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you stare at the orange juice container because it says concentrate on it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she wore a blue rain coat people said, "Let''s go swim in the ocean!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you ride the electric floorbuffer and mistake it for your wife!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. What''s the real reason a brunette keeps her figure? No one else wants it. 2. What''s a brunette''s mating call? "Has the blonde left yet?" 3. What do you call a brunette who dies her hair blonde? Artifical Stupidity 4. What kind of costumes do brunette girls wear on Halloween? They just stand on their heads and go as dirty mops. 5. Why don''t brunettes get breast implants? They''ve already spent their money on thigh and butt implants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you wear a tube top to a funeral!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might think that some guys are hot. Their boyfriends think that, too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant. Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult The Face Is Familiar, But I Can''t Quite Remember My Name I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To Fight Crime: Shoot Back! Caution -- Driver Legally Blonde! If You Drink Don''t Park. Accidents Cause People. If You''re Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass. You''re Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If we quit voting, will they all go away? It''s been lovely but I have to scream now I haven''t lost my mind -- it''s backed up on disk somewhere Boldly going nowhere Don''t be sexist -- broads hate that Old lawyers never die, they just lose their appeal. How could two people as beautiful as you have such an ugly baby?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. After having met you, I''ve changed my mind. I must admit, you brought Religion in my life. I never believed in Hell til I met you. Looking back over the years that we''ve been together, I can''t help but wonder: What the hell was I thinking? As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am that you''re not here to ruin it for me. As you grow older, Mom, I think of all the gifts you''ve given me. Like the need for therapy...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thanks for being a part of my life!!! I never knew what evil was before this! Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go, I would like to take this knife out of my back. You''ll probably need it again. Someday I hope to get married, but not to you. Sorry things didn''t work out, but I can''t handle guys with boobs that are bigger than mine. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age...Almost Lifelike!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris is.... ...stupid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an arctic animal shaped like a tooth? A: A molar bear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not Funny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What did the frog order at McDonald''s? Answer: An order of french flies and a diet croak!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pope was finishing his sermon. He ended it with the Latin phrase, "Tuti Homini" - Blessed be Mankind. A women''s rights group approached the Pope the next day. They noticed that the pope blessed all Mankind, but not Womankind. The next day, after His sermon, the Pope concluded by saying, "Tuti Homini, et Tuti Femini" - Blessed be Mankind and Womankind. The next day, a gay-rights group approached the Pope. They said that they noticed that he blessed man kind and woman kind, and asked if he could also bless gay people. The Pope said, "Sure". The next day, the Pope concluded his sermon with, "Tuti Homini, et Tuti Femini, et Tuti Fruiti."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Why don''t blondes eat bananas? They can''t find the zipper. 2 Why don''t blondes use vibrators? They chip their teeth. 3 Why don''t blondes in San Francisco wear short black mini skirts? Cause their balls show. 4 Why don''t a blondes eyes fall out of her when she stands? The vacuum in her head keeps them in place. 5 What does a blonde answer to the question "Are you sexually active?" "No, I just lie there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man from Perdition Who knew his way around a kitchen His wife was good lookin'' The kids loved his cookin'' But his mother-in-law kept on bitchin''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar. He falls down, unconscious. Why is this? Because the man walked into a solid bar. A solid, metal bar!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, a beautiful, independent, and self assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped onto the princess'' lap and said, "Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and setup housekeeping in yon castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so." Later that night, as the princess dined sumptuously on a repast of lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled to herself and thought longingly about what her dinner said... "I don''t freakin'' think so!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when you give a politician viagra? He gets taller.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brenda O''Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door. "Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I''ve some thin'' to tell ya." "Of course you can come in. You''re always welcome, Tim. But where''s me husband?" "That''s what I''m here to be telling ya, Brenda. There was an accident at the Guinness brewery." " Oh, God, no!" cries Brenda. "Please don''t tell me." "I must, Brenda. Your husband Seamus is dead and gone. I''m sorry." Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?" "It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned." "Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?" "Well, Brenda, no. In fact, he got out three times to pee."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens to a scone when you have eaten it? It''s scone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so dumb she studied for a urine test!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, yo daddy had eye surgery TO REMOVE HIS SIGHT!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a turtle loses its shell is it naked or homeless? If fire fighters fight fires and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight??? If nothing sticks to teflon, then how do they make teflon stick to the pan? Why do Kamikaze pilots wear seatbelts? If love is blind, then why is lingere so popular? Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? If a black box flight recorder is never damaged in a plane crash, why dont they make the whole plane out of that stuff? Why is there an expiration date on sour cream? If most car accidents occur within 5 kilometers of home, then why doesnt every one just move 5 k''s away? Why are psychics still working if they all know the winning lottery numbers? If you try to fail, but you succeed, which have you done?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police officer, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was relieved of duty early, and arrived home four hours ahead of schedule, at 2 AM. Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, crept into the bedroom, and started to climb into bed. She sleepily sat up and said, "Mike, dearest, would you go down to the all-night drug store on the next block and get me some aspirin? I''ve got a splitting headache." "Certainly, honey," he said, and feeling his way across the room, he got dressed and walked over to the drug store. As he arrived, the pharmacist looked up in surprise, "Say," said the druggist, "aren''t you Officer Fenwick of the 8th District?" "Yes, I am," said the officer. "Well, then, what in the world are you doing in the Fire Chief''s uniform?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cover Charge: $15.00 Round of Drinks: $23.00 Table Dance: $30.00 Another Round of Drinks: $23.00 Couch Dance and Tips: $50.00 A Round of Shots: $34.00 Another Round of Drinks: $23.00 Lap Dance and Hand Job: $100.00 Private Dance and Hotel Room: $500.00 Sending her on her way without having to cuddle or listen to her: ...........PRICELESS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newfie is walking down Yonge street in Toronto and sees a store front. The only thing inside are 2 guys sitting on stools. The newfie walks in and says "Hey what are you guys selling?" The one guy, recognizing the accent as being newfie, says "we''re selling assholes!" The newfie responds "HOLY SHIT! Business must be good; you only have 2 left!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where is the safest place to hide money from a redneck? In his work boots! How can you tell a redneck has been in your backyard? Your bike is gone and the dog is pregnant!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many newfies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 2 one to hold the light bulb and 1 to spin him round and round.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many Newfie farmers does it take to milk a cow? A: 5...One to hold the utter and four to lift the cow up and down, up and down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse a redneck Ask him a question that is not about NASCAR.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how are we alike?" "You''re both old," he replied!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Relish today, ketchup tomorrow! A hamburger walks into the bar, and the bartender says, "Sorry, we don''t serve food here." I wanted to be a mime, but I talked myself out of it. Doctors tell us there are over seven million people who are overweight. These, of course, are only round figures.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you call a man with no arms and no legs at a work-out place? Jim What you call a man with no arms and no legs at your door? Matt What you call a man with no arms and no legs in your bathroom? John What you call a man with no arms and no legs in a trench? Phil What you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pit? Doug What you call a man with no arms and no legs with a cat? Tom What you call a girl with one leg? Ilene What you call a Japanese girl with one leg? Irene What do you call a pig with no legs? Groundhog', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frankienstien was out on a rainy day and he saw a very ugly guy. "Lookin'' good!" he said to him. Later he saw a super model he said, "So, how''d you get to be a mutant?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem. A small child replied, "They couldn''t get a baby-sitter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wise schoolteacher sends this note to all parents on the first day of school: "If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school, I''ll promise not to believe everything he says happens at home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord''s Prayer. For several evenings, at bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer: "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us from e-mail. Amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy. The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions. "Ever have an accident?" "Nope, nary a one." "None? You''ve never had any accidents." "Nope. Ain''t never had one. Never." "Well, you said on this form you were bit by a snake once. Wouldn''t you consider that an accident?" "Heck, no. That dang varmint bit me on purpose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tall weather-worn cowboy walked into the saloon and ordered a beer. The regulars quietly observed the drifter through half-closed eyelids. No one spoke, but they all noticed that the stranger''s hat was made of brown wrapping paper. Less obvious was the fact that his shirt and vest were also made of paper. As were his chaps, pants, and even his boots, including the paper spurs. Truth be told, even the saddle, blanket and bridle on his horse were made entirely of paper. Of course he was soon arrested for rustling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a friend''s wedding, everything went smoothly, until it was time for the flower girl and her young escort to come down the aisle. The boy stopped at every pew, growling at the guests. When asked afterward, why he behaved so badly, he explained, "I was just trying to be a good ring bear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks, "What are you doing?!!" The blind man replies, "Just looking around."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The farmer''s son was returning from the market, with the crate of chicken''s his father had entrusted to him, when all of a sudden, the box fell and broke open. Chickens scurried off in different directions, but the determined boy walked all over the neighborhood, scooping up the wayward birds, and returning them to the repaired crate. Hoping he had found them all, the boy reluctantly returned home, expecting the worst. "Pa, the chickens got loose," the boy confessed sadly, "but I managed to find all twelve of them." "Well, you did real good, son," the farmer beamed. "You left with seven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her brunette friend were talking. The blonde says, "I hate all the blonde jokes people say." "Oh, they are only jokes. There are alot of stupid people out there. Here I''ll prove it to you," replies her brunette friend. So they went outside and hailed a taxi driver. "Please take me to 29 Nickle Street to see if I''m home," said the brunette. The taxi drove them, and when they finally got out, the brunette looked at the blonde and said, "See, that guy was really stupid." "No kidding," replies the blonde." There was a pay phone just around the corner. You could have called instead."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My son is proof that anyone can be successful enough to drive a BMW or Mercedes. And besides, he looks so cute in his valet parking attendant uniform.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elementary school teacher asked her students to write a truthful report on what they would do if they had a million dollars. There was only one student who recieved an A, and the rest failed for lying. This was the paper with the A: Johnny ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? Prostitutes Appeal to Pope Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax Miners Refuse to Work after Death Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant Stolen Painting Found by Tree Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One War Dims Hope for Peace Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge Deer Kill 17,000 Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft Kids Make Nutritious Snacks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half New Vaccine May Contain Rabies Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing Air Head Fired Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction Sex Education Delayed, Teachers Request Training Include your Children when Baking Cookies', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there? Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime? If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen? You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"? Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the french dog look in the toilet? Wee wee', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Might be a Redneck If you take your family to K-Mart to see a movie.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today, if you meet someone from France, they will say, "Bonjour, Je suis de la France." This is what they would say if America knew France wasn''t going to pay us back for helping them. "Hallo, bin ich von Frankreich."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, looking at the old pages as he turned them. Then something fell out, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree, that had been pressed between the pages. "Momma, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. With astonishment in the his voice, he answered, "It''s Adam''s Suit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Six-year old Angie and her four-year old brother, Joel, were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had enough. "You''re not supposed to talk out loud in church." "Why? Who''s going to stop me?" Joel asked. Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door? They''re hushers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack was living in Arizona, during a heat wave, when the following took place. "It''s just too hot to wear clothes today," complained Jack, as he stepped out of the shower. "Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?" "Probably that I married you for your money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sheri, the pert and pretty nurse, took her troubles to a resident psychiatrist in the hospital where she worked. "Doctor, you must help me," she pleaded. "It''s gotten so that every time I meet one of the young doctors here, I end up dating him. And then afterward, I feel guilty and depressed for a week." "I see," nodded the psychiatrist. "And you, no doubt, want me to strengthen your will power and resolve in this matter." "NO!!!" exclaimed the nurse. "I want you to fix it so I won''t feel guilty and depressed afterward!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship. BEER: It''s not just for breakfast anymore. So you''re a feminist...Isn''t that cute. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. All men are idiots....I married their king. IRS: We''ve got what it takes to take what you''ve got. Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now. Reality is a crutch for people who can''t handle drugs. Out of my mind...Back in five minutes. I took an IQ test and the results were negative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A first-time father was taking a turn at feeding the baby some strained peas. Naturally, there were traces of the food everywhere, especially on the infant. His wife comes in, looks at the infant, then at her husband staring into space, then says, "What in the world are you doing?" He replied, "I''m waiting for the first coat to dry, so I can put on another."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A computer teacher who doesn''t speak good english tells his student "Paul open the window let the Air Force Come." At another time the same teacher and his wife sees one of his students in mall. The next day the teacher says to the student "Tim, yesterday I saw you with my wife at the mall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why were the British fighting us in the war of 1812? A: Because they were done beating up the French, and they needed someone new to pick on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many drummers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5... 1 to try and fail, 3 to stand around and pretend to be musicians, and 1 to actually do it right. How many trumpet players does it take to screw in a light bulb? 3... 1 to do it, and 2 to say they can do it better. How many tuba players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2... 1 to crush the lightbulb, and the other to fight about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do scientists use to freshen their breath? Experi-mints', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path? Tyrannosaurus wrecks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your kids are named after the car they were made in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a three legged dog walked into a bar. He said, "I''m looking for the guy that shot my paw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The British had an organization that Americans are now considering adopting. It seems that in England, they had a men''s club, Bachelors'' Anonymous. It was highly successful in making men fear or even hate marriage. The club provided a unique way to treat the problem of bachelors wanting to marry. They send over a mother-in-law in nightgown, hair curlers, and a mud pack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A famous professor of surgery died and went to heaven. At the pearly gate he was asked by the gatekeeper: ''Have you ever committed a sin you truly regret?'' ''Yes,'' the professor ansvered. ''When I was a young candidate at the hospital of Saint Lucas, we played soccer against at team from the Community Hospital, and I scored a goal, which was off-side. But the referee did not see it so, and the goal won us the match. I regret that now.'' ''Well,'' said the gatekeeper. ''That is a very minor sin. You may enter.'' ''Thank you very much, Saint Peter,'' the professor ansvered. ''I am not Saint Peter,'' said the gatekeeper. ''He is having his lunchbreak. I am Saint Lucas.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. The only things more accurate than enemy fire is friendly fire. 2. Teamwork is essential. It gives them more targets to shoot at. 3. No inspection-ready unit ever passed combat. 4. No combat-ready unit ever passed inspection. 5. Remember: your aircraft was made by the lowest bidder. 6. Never share a cockpit with someone braver than you. 7. You are not Tom Cruise. 8. SAMs and AAA have the right-of-way. 9. If you aren''t sure, the SAMs are pointed at you. 10. If hit, landing near the people that just shot you down is not a good idea. 11. Close only counts in horseshoes, nukes and proximity-fused missiles. 12. Smart bombs have bad days too. 13. The best defense is to stay out of range. 14. If you are short on everything but enemy, you are in combat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are out hunting deer. The first guy says, "Did you see that?" "No," the second guy says. "Well, a bald eagle just flew overhead," the first guy says. "Oh," says the second guy. A couple of minutes later, the first guy says, "Did you see that?" "See what?" the second guy asks. "Are you blind? There was a big, black bear walking on that hill, over there." "Oh." A few minutes later the first guy says: "Did you see that?" By now, the second guy is getting aggravated, so he says, "Yes, I did!" And the first guy says: "Then why did you step in it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Egotistical Harry was always reminding people that he played semi-pro baseball. "I was the James Bond type of player," he told his friends. "I had all sorts of tricks to confuse the opposition." "Batted .007," his wife added.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve never understood why women love cats. Cats are independent, they don''t listen, they don''t come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they''re home they like to be left alone and sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young college co-ed came running in tears to her father. "Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!" "I did? What did I tell you?" said the dad. "You told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that big bank is in trouble." "What are you talking about? That''s one of the largest banks in the state," he said. "there must be some mistake." "I don''t think so," she sniffed. "They just returned one of my checks with a note saying, ''Insufficient Funds''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of my daughter''s wedding presents was a toaster oven. Soon after the honeymoon, she and her husband tried it out. Almost immediately, smoke billowed out of the toaster. "Get the owner''s manual!" her husband shouted. "I can''t find it anywhere!" she cried, searching through the box. "Oops!" came a voice from the kitchen. "Well, the toast is fine, but the owner''s manual is burnt to a crisp."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a Mechanical Engineer, Electrical Engineer, Chemical Engineer and Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car. The car broke down. The Mechanical Engineer said, "I think a rod broke." The Chemical Engineer said, "The way it sputtered at the end, I don''t think it''s getting gas." The Electrical Engineer said, "I think there was a spark and something is wrong with the electrical system." All three turned to the computer engineer and said, "What do you think?" The Computer Engineer said, "I think we should all get out and get back in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Bobby was spending the weekend with his grandmother, after a particularly trying week in kindergarten. His grandmother decided to take him to the park on Saturday morning. It had been snowing all night, and everything was beautiful. His grandmother remarked,"Doesn''t it look like an artist painted this scenery? Did you know God painted this just for you?" Bobby said, "Yes, God did it and he did it left handed." This confused his grandmother a bit, and she asked him, "What makes you say God did this with his left hand?" Well," said Bobby, "we learned at Sunday School last week that Jesus sits on God''s right hand!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend''s husband always teases her about her lack of interest in household chores. One day he came home with a gag gift, a refrigerator magnet, that read: "Martha Stewart doesn''t live here." The next day he came home to find the magnet holding up a slip of paper. The note read, "Neither does Bob Vila."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a radio station, everyone can turn her on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross a rhino and and elephant? Elepf-ino (pronounced "Hell if I know")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once asked a foreign person if i could bang on his drum, he told me, "You can''t bang on my drum, but you can bang on my bum!" -If this ever happens to you, run!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman caught a nasty little boy, with a penknife in one hand and a squirrel in the other. "Now listen here," the policeman said. "Whatever you do to that poor, defenseless creature, I shall personally do to you" "In that case," said the boy, "I''ll kiss it on the forehead and let it go"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. He walks up to the bar and takes a seat. The giraffe does the same. The man orders a beer for himself, and a double scotch for the giraffe. They both proceed to drink, and, after a while, they order the same again. They continue all night, ordering the same drinks, drinking them, and ordering another load, untill suddenly, the giraffe falls off his stool, and lies unconscious on the floor. The man gets up of his stool and heads for the door. The barman shouts at him as he heads out the door "You can''t leave that lyin'' ''ere!" The man replies, "Its not a lion, its a giraffe!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know, luckily they have this fraud protection thing going around. It''s supposed to save your butt if it''s happened to you. Capital one has it, Visa, Master Card, etc. If they notice some unusual activity, they''ll give you a call like this: "Hi, this is Capital One calling. We''ve noticed a lot of unusual activity on your account the past couple of days, and we were just wondering if you''ve lost your card." Have you ever got a call like that? It could save your credit. That practice seemed like a good idea, and, apparently, it''s being used by everyone. But I don''t think I could have prepared myself when I got a call last sunday afternoon that went like this: "Hi, this is Heaven calling. We''ve noticed a lot of unusual activity coming from you these past couple of days, and we were just wondering if you''ve lost your mind." Well, apparently, by saying yes, I saved my soul. (But off the record, it was one hell of a weekend :-D :-D )', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it, but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him. He dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin, as fast as he could. He ran pretty fast, but the bear was just a little faster, and gained on him with every step. Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat. Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin. The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is an old story about the data centre of the future. This data centre runs 24/7 with only a man and a dog. The man''s job is to feed the dog. The dog''s job is to make sure the man does not touch the computer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John, for heaven''s sake, why can''t you just talk to me once in awhile?" whined Mari. "Huh?" John responded. "Look around you!" she yells, as she points around the room. "All these books. Your head is always buried in books. You don''t even know I''m alive!" "Oh. I''m sorry." "You know, sometimes I wish I were a book. Then you''d at least look at me." "Hmmm," John mumbled in deep thought, "that''s not a bad idea. Then I could take you to the library every few days and change you for something more interesting."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man and his wife were lying in bed and she was complaining that his penis was small and asked why he didn''t do something about it. The next night thay were in bed and she reached between his legs and gasped, "How did it get so big?" Husband said, "Simple, I went to the hospital and had an operation." The wife replied, "What kind of operation?" The husband said, "I had an addadicktome!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your limo at your wedding was a tractor and trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your honeymoon was at the family farm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The king had a powerful army. He reined for 7 years before clearing the clouds!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My computer is so old, it has a VHS slot instead of a CD/DVD slot!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... ...your porch collapses and kills more than 3 dogs. ...you see your family reunion as a way to meet girls. ...you marry three times and still have the same in-laws.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Both of the following men have cheated on their wives and have decided to take it to the Lord. One is a gangster and one is a Christian. This is their prayers.... Christian husband: Dear Father Son and Holy Ghost, I have sinned and am so sorry. I cheated on my wife with her best friend. Please allow my wife to forgive me for it was a long night and I didn''t mean to hurt her. Amen Gangster husband: Waz up Pops Pops Jr. and Spooks, I cheated on my women last night. She is pissed off but I have a good reason for my actions. You see I''m a pimp in my old town and one of my leading ladies was having some trouble so you know, Lil'' Willy down there make it all better. Well, my woman found out so you know let this blow over. Gangster out', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell the difference between a violin and a fiddle? Look at the audience!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went into his shrink''s office and says, "Doc, you have got to help me! Every night I keep dreaming that I''m a sports car. "The other night I dreamed I was a Ferrari. Another night I dreamed I was a BMW. Last night I dreamed I was a Porsche. What does this mean?" "Relax," says the doctor; "you''re just having an auto-body experience."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was a new Army basic trainee at Fort McClellan, and one requirement was a demanding 12-mile march. We got started at 6 a.m. and were pumped up for the trek. An hour later, feeling the heavy load of our packs, we wondered if the end would ever come. "Men," our sergeant yelled, "you''re doing a fine job. We''ve already covered four miles!" Revitalized, we picked up the pace. "And," he continued, "we should reach the starting point any minute now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After intensive investigation on both the Soviet and US parts, spokespersons from both space agencies have determined the cause for the accident which has placed the station and its resident personnel in jeopardy. In terse statements at a recent press conference, Soviet and US space agency spokespersons said Thursday We have concluded joint investigations concerning this potentially tragic accident and each nations'' team, separately, has arrived at identical conclusions for this incident. The accident was caused by one thing and one thing only: OBJECTS IN MIR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were driving down a country lane on their way to visit some friends. They came to a muddy patch in the road and the car became bogged. After a few minutes of trying to get the car out by themselves, they saw a young farmer coming down the lane, driving some oxen before him. The farmer stopped when he saw the couple in trouble and offered to pull the car out of the mud for $50. The husband accepted and minutes later the car was free. The farmer turned to the husband and said, "You know, you''re the tenth car I''ve helped out of the mud today." The husband looks around at the fields incredulously and asks the farmer, "When do you have time to plough your land? At night?" "No," the young farmer replied seriously, "Night is when I put the water in the hole."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fellow was very much in love with a beautiful girl. One day she told him that the next day was her birthday. He told her he would send her a bouquet of roses, one for each year of her life. That evening he called the local florist and ordered twenty-one roses with instructions that they be delivered first thing the next morning. As the florist was preparing the order, he decided that since the young man was such a good customer, he would put an extra dozen roses in the bouquet. The fellow never did find out what made the young girl so angry with him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A retiring farmer in preparation for selling his land, needed to rid his farm of animals. So he went to every house in his town. To the houses where the man is the boss, he gave a horse. To the houses where the woman is the boss, a chicken was given. He got toward the end of the street and saw a couple outside gardening. "Who''s the boss around here?" he asked. "I am." said the man. "I have a black horse and a brown horse," the farmer said, "which one would you like?" The man thought for a minute and said, "The black one." "No, no, no, get the brown one." the man''s wife said. "Here''s your chicken." said the farmer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For weeks a six-year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house. One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements of the unborn child. The six-year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacher about the impending event. The teacher finally sat the boy on her lap and said, "Tommy, whatever has become of that baby brother or sister you were expecting at home?" Tommy burst into tears and confessed, "I think Mommy ate it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hello, this is probably 327-4681, yes, the house of the famous statistician. I''m probably not at home, or not wanting to answer the phone, most probably the latter, according to my latest calculations. Supposing that the universe doesn''t end in the next 30 seconds, the odds of which I''m still trying to calculate, you can leave your name, phone number, and message, and I''ll probably phone you back. So far the probability of that is about 0.645. Have a nice day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: I''m in a hospital! Why am I in here? Doctor: You''ve had an accident involving a train. Patient: What happened? Doctor: Well, I''ve got some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first? Patient: Well... The bad news first... Doctor: Your legs were injured so badly that we had to amputate both of them. Patient: That''s terrible! What''s the good news? Doctor: There''s a guy in the next ward who made a very good offer on your slippers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four married guys go golfing on Sunday. During the 3rd hole the following conversation ensued: First Guy: "Man, you have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out golfing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend." Second Guy: "That''s nothing, I had to promise my wife that I will build her a new deck for the pool." Third Guy: "Man, you both have it easy! I had to promise my wife that I will remodel the kitchen for her." They continue to play the hole when they realized that the fourth guy has not said a word. So they ask him. "You haven''t said anything about what you had to do to be able to come golfing this weekend. What''s the deal?" Fourth Guy: "I don''t want to talk about it. Let''s just say that the foundation for the new house is being poured next Tuesday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob was propped up against a palm tree and acting so calmly it drove Joe crazy. "Don''t you understand?!? We''re going to die!!" Bob replied, "You don''t understand, I make $100,000 a week." Joe looked at him quite dumbfounded and asked, "What difference does that make?!? We''re on an island with no food and no water! We''re going to DIE!!!" Bob answered, "You just don''t get it. I make $100,000 a week and I tithe ten percent on that $100,000 a week. My pastor will find me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bet that India would win against Pakistan and lost Rs 1,000. Tommy told Rob. "Hey, you bet Rs 1,000 for a single match?" Rob exclaimed. "No Man, I bet Rs 500 on that match." Tommy replied. "So, what happened to the other Rs 500?" Rob asked. "My Friend, I bet on the highlights too." Tommy replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a guy who liked cheese.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I like hippos ''cause they''re fat and don''t care what other hippos think.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde decides to do something wild she hasn''t done before, so she sets out to rent her first x-rated adult video. She goes to the video store and, after looking around for a while, selects a title that sounds very stimulating. When she arrives home, lights some candles, slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape into the VCR. To her disappointment, there''s nothing but static on the screen, so she calls the video store to complain. "I just rented an adult movie from you and there''s nothing on the tape but static." "Sorry about, that," replied the store clerk. "We''ve had problems with some of those tapes. Which title did you rent?" The blonde replied, "It''s called ''Head Cleaner.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blonds are so dumb. I''m lucky my hair is yellow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she stepped on a peanut and she made peanut butter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she''s stupid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was an old man 70 years old named Bob who was married to his 73 year old wife, Mary. They had their grandchild, named Caroline over. Once they got home from their walk, Bob offered Caroline some hot chocolate, toast, and eggs. "Of course!" She said with delight. Then, Bob goes in to make the meal for Caroline and Mary follows to help. Bob and Mary take an hour to walk into the kitchen, take three hours making the meal, and take an hour to walk back into the living room in which Caroline was in with the meal. Caroline noticed, "Hey, you forgot the Hot chocolate and toast!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again." To which the gentleman said, "Oh, I haven''t told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I''ve changed my will three times!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are trying to set up a fenced-in area for some sheep, but they have a limited amount of building material. The engineer gets up first and makes a square fence with the material, reasoning that it''s a pretty good working solution. "No no," says the physicist, "there''s a better way." He takes the fence and makes a circular pen, showing how it encompasses the maximum possible space with the given material. Then the mathematician speaks up: "No, no, there''s an even better way." To the others'' amusement he proceeds to construct a little tiny fence around himself, then declares: "I define myself to be on the outside."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening after work, a man drove his secretary home after she had a little too much to drink at a party. Although nothing happened, he decided not to mention it to his wife. Later that night, the man and his wife were driving to a movie when he spotted a high-heeled shoe hidden under the passenger seat. Pointing to something out the passenger window to distract his wife, he picked up the shoe and tossed it out of his window. They arrived at the theater a short time later and were about to get out of the car when his wife asked, "Honey, have you seen my other shoe?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk. So the bartender says to another man in the bar: "Why don''t you be a good samaritan and take him home." The man takes the drunk out the door, and to his car, and he stumbles at least ten times. They drive along and the drunk points out his house to the man. He stops the car, and the drunk stumbles up the steps to his house with the man. The drunk''s wife greets them at the door: "Why thank you for bringing him home for me, but where''s his wheel chair?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!!!................................ its funny cause the robot doesnt have any legs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('somewhere in Calfornia, USA, there is a man who want to open up a business. So he decided to build a restaurant. On the grand opening day, he put a large sign: "BEST RESTAURANT IN CALIFORNIA". And there''s another man do the same thing (make a new restaurant) close to the first man. He put a big sign: "BEST RESTAURANT IN AMERICA" There''s another man also do the same thing. He''s even more arrogant than the first two. He then put a big sign: "BEST RESTAURANT IN THE WORLD" ANOTHER man decided to do the same thing. But this man is wiser than the first three. So instead of put a bombastic sign, he only put a normal sign in front of his new restaurant: "Best Restaurant on this road"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never trust google! why? follow the instruction below and you''ll get what I mean Please do it right now and see the blunder made by google. 1. Open google 2. Click ''language tools'' link. 3. Write "Linda''s mom is very nice" in ''Translate text:'' textbox. 4. Select "English to Spanish" in the below combo. 5. Press Translate and wait for translation. 6. Now copy the translated text from the above text and paste it in the ''Translate text:'' textbox. 7. Select "Spanish to English" in the below combo. 8. Press Translate and wait for translation. 9. Enjoy. Copy paste below''s URL to go to translator page of google: http://www.google.com/language_tools?hl=en', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy asked to his girl friends: What does a gay cow eat? all of his friends failed to answer. Then he stood up, and with a gay-est falsetto voice he said: Haaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new Ensign was assigned to subs, where he''d dreamed of working since a young boy. He was trying to impress the Master Chief with his expertise learned in Submarine School. The Master Chief cut him off quickly and said, "Listen, ''sir'', it''s real simple. Add the number of times we dive to the number of times we surface. Divide that number by two. If the result doesn''t come out even, don''t open the hatch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from an exclusive jewelry store. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don''t want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch, and we forget about this?" The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend. Can you show me something less expensive?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oh, the network outside is frightful, But on campus, it''s so delightful, Our packets have nowhere to go, Net is slow, net is slow, net is slow. It doesn''t show signs of stopping, All our packets, our hosts are dropping; Bandwidth is turned way down low, Net is slow, net is slow, net is slow. When we finally connect to a site, It''s time to go back to the dorm; But if I could stay here all night, I could submit their Web form. The network is slowly dying, And, I fear, we''re still denying, But as long as Sprint is the way to go, Net is slow, net is slow, net is slow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice. The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy." The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy''s nervousness builds. He remembers his father''s advice, and chooses the first topic. He asks the girl: "Do you like spinach?" She says "No," and the silence returns. After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father''s suggestion and turns to the second item on the list. He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again. The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father''s advice and asks the girl the following question: "If you had a brother, would he like spinach?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you here about the giant with a nosebleed? It was all over town', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy went to his grandpa''s & grandma''s house. He asked his grandpa, while his hand holds a worm, "If I can make this worm stiff, would you give me $10?" His grandpa said, "Yes." Then he sprayed the worm with hair spray, and the worm became stiff. The grandpa looked surprised. He then tells his wife about what happened, and together, they give the boy $20. Grandma then said, "Here''s $10 from grandpa for making the worm stiff, as he promised, and $10 from me for the great idea."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a Polish man and an American on the street corner. The American man wanted to see if the Polish really were stupid. The Polish man replied, "No, you stupid American, we are not." The American then puts his hand in front of a metal pole, and tells the Polish man, he''s sorry to hit him for it. When he goes to hit him, the American moves his hand, leaving the Polish man crying. The Polish man then puts his hand in front of his face and says, "What now?" The Polish man went to the hospital. The entire time he was there, he insisted he screw the room lightbulb in himself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your dog is in your bed more than your wife.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Kook Kook who? Hey, who you calling cukoo mister?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a cock always close his eyes when he''s crowing? Because he already knows the text!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the similarity between Einstein and Newton? Neither of them ever had a mobile phone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do pigs STINK? Because they have four armpits..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What door cannot be pushed, even by 10 people simultaneously? The door that says: PULL', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A college student walks down the road when he sees a beggar on the side of the street. College Student (C) : Hey mister! whatsup! Beggar (B) : Yea how you doin''... C: So, how long have you''ve been a beggar? B: It''s about eight years now kid.. C: WOW! Thats long time.. how much do you get per day? B: Not that bad... about 250 bucks a day... C: That''s enermous! B: Yeah.. Enough for living my family.. C: Owch.. you got family too! Where are they now? B: My wife''s dead. I got three children, one of them in Harvard University, one in MIT, and the other one went oversea, he goes to Oxford University... C: *pause, surprised* That''s..that''s really great... So, when they''re gonna be graduated? B: No kid... they''re not studying! They beg in there! just like me!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER : There is a frog, ship is sinking, potatoes cost $10/kg, then what is my age? STUDENT : 32 yrs! TEACHER : How do you know? STUDENT : Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You fart and you are proud of the smell', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Make sure you are in a public place with a lot of people around. Sniff the air a couple of times (make sure it is loud sniffs). Turn to you wife and say in a loud voice "Hey honey did you fart?!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so uncoordinated she couldn''t hit water if she fell out of a boat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas is so fat it takes a twinky and a tub of butter to get her through the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know we all have those moments and I''m going to share a few of them with you. At lunch I was going crazy looking for my purse. It was literally right in front of me...on the table. My friend across from me suddenly said "Where''s Tina?" She was sitting right next to her. I was having a conversation with my friend on the bus and five seconds later I couldn''t remember what it was about. I still can''t Maybe it was about bread.... When people lose their cell phones why don''t they just call them? Even if they''re on vibrate you can still hear them a little bit..... At work I''m constantly trying to give change in dimes instead of just using a quarter....I know not that bad but yea. I had to call home once and I fergot my own phone number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a dog with no hind legs and metal balls? A: Sparky!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blind guy, a deaf guy, and an armless guy were in a cave. All of a sudden, a blind guy said he heard something, the deaf guy said he saw something, and the armless guy said "Let''s kick his ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to the neurologist yesterday, to find out if I still needed to take my medication, right? Well, he goes off on a random tangent about Hershey Park and I''m like, what the heck, I thought this was about me, not a theme park. And so, somehow, he decides that I need to take two pills instead of one, and again, I''m like what the heck, this guy is nuts! And then after he decides this, he randomly decides to check the reflexes in my elbows and my knees and my ankles. I am laughing uncontrollably and my moms looked at me like I was nuts - I still don''t know what my reflexes have to do with my migraines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: How long is a minute? Answer: That depends on which side of the bathroom door you are on!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do snakes use for birth control? An Anacondom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: Is your dad a baker? Girl: No. Why? Boy: Cause you''re a cutie pie!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s just like a bus. They''re big, smelly, and you can ride it for a buck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Lower corner of screen has the words "Etch-a-sketch" on it. 9. Its celebrity spokesman is that "Hey Vern!" guy. 8. In order to start it, you need some jumper cables and a friend''s car. 7. Its slogan is "Pentium: redefining mathematics". 6. The "quick reference" manual is 120 pages long. 5. Whenever you turn it on, all the dogs in your neighborhood start howling. 4. The screen often displays the message, "Ain''t it break time yet?" 3. The manual contains only one sentence: "Good Luck!" 2. The only chip inside is a Dorito. 1. You''ve decided that your computer is an excellent addition to your fabulous paperweight collection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you seen the current remake of the movie "Cape Fear?" It''s about a deranged psychotic who is seeking revenge against a lawyer. The question is, while watching the movie, for whom do you root?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Potatoes are standing on a street corner. How do you know which one is a hooker? It''s the one stamped I-da-Ho (Idaho potato)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy is walking down the street with his friend. He says to his friend, "I''m a walking economy." His friend replies, "How''s that?" "It''s like this -- my hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and the combination of these factors is putting me into a deep depression."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Morning sickness would rank as the nation''s number one health problem. 2. Maternity leave would last for two years with full pay. 3. Children would be kept in the hospital until toilet trained. 4. Natural childbirth would become obsolete. 5. All methods of birth control would become 100% effective. 6. Men would be eager to talk about commitment. 7. There would be a cure for stretch marks. 8. They would serve beer instead of coffee at antenatal classes. 9. Men wouldn''t think twins were so cute. 10. Sons would have to come home from dates by 9 pm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am not a believer in seances, but I went to one just to see what they are like. The psychic was doing his thing and grinning from ear to ear. I assumed his merriment was due to the fact that he was fooling a gullible public and gave him a poke in the nose. You can probably guess the rest. I was arrested for striking a happy medium.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter. Mother: "What does the cow say?" Child: "Moo!" Mother: "Great! What does the cat say?" Child: "Meow." Mother: "Oh, you''re so smart! What does the frog say?" And this wide-eyed little 3 year-old looked up at her mother and in her deepest voice replied, "Bud."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give me two shots." Bartender says, "You want them both now or one at a time?" The guy says," Oh, I want them both now. One''s for me and one''s for this little guy here," and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of his pocket. The bartender asks "He can drink?" "Oh, sure. He can drink." So the bartender pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks it all up. "That''s amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can he walk?" The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says, "Hey, Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to the end of the bar and picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down and gives it to the man. The bartender is in total shock. "That''s amazing" he says, "what else can he do? Does he talk?" The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time we were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor''s powers!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A unit of soldiers was marching a long dusty march across the rolling prairie. It was a blisteringly hot day and the men, longing for water and rest, were impatient to reach the next town. A rancher rode past. "Say, friend," called out one of the men, "how far is it to the next town?" "Oh, a matter of two miles or so, I reckon," called back the rancher. Another long hour dragged by, and another rancher was encountered. "How far to the next town?" the men asked him eagerly. "Oh, a good two miles." A nearly half hour longer of marching, and then a third rancher. "Hey, how far''s the next town?" "Not far," was the encouraging answer, "only about two miles." "Well," sighed the optimistic sergeant, "thank God, we''re holding our own, anyhow!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma''s so fat, her blood type is rocky road.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes into a diner, and when the waitress comes over to take his order, he says, "I want eggs, toast, and coffee. But make the eggs uncooked, the toast burnt, and the coffee really strong and bad. And I want you to slam the food onto the table and yell at me." The waitress says "Why would you want me to something like that?" He replies, "I''m homesick."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where do nudists go fishing? A: Moon River. Q: What do you call a singing hot dog in New York, New York? A: Frank Sinatra. Q: What do you call a really smart cow? A: Grade A beef. Q: What song do they play at plumbers'' funerals? A: Taps. Q: Where do you take a sick potato? A: To a M.A.S.H. unit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Their was a very rich old lady that died.Before she died she gave all her money and stuff to her children and grandchildren. She had one thing left to give out. It was a diamond. She said she hid it in a cylinder with squares. A grandchild said he knew where it was. Where was it???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Procrastinators meeting tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma''s so fat, when she went to the zoo elephants called her mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to work and kills everyone...what is this called...? Going Postal...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I AM WRITING IN CAPITAL LETTERS BECAUSE IT MAKES IT SEEM LIKE I AM YELLING IN YOUR HEAD AND I LIKE THE IDEA OF YELLING IN YOUR HEAD. IT MAKES ME FEEL POWERFUL!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Dodgers and the children in the neighbourhood are raking leaves at Mr. Dodger''s house. They have three piles of leaves in the back yard, and seven piles of leaves in the front yard. When Mr. Dodgers and the children put all the piles together, how many piles of leaves will they have? JUST ONE BIG PILE!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. "What''s going on?" she yells out the window. "Cow on the track!" replies the conductor. Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it stops again. The woman sees the same conductor walk again. She leans out the window and yells, "What happened? Did we catch up with the cow again?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is your dad a baker? Because those buns are lookin'' good! I lost my phone number, can I have yours?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When our lawn mower broke and wouldn''t run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck, the car, fishing, always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a few minutes. When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. "When you finish cutting the grass," I said, "you might as well sweep the sidewalk." The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rusty Bed Spings by I.P Nitely "Fell off a Cliff" By Ilene Dover "Bounce of a Brick Wall" by Rick O''Shey "Mini Skirts" by Seymour Buttz "Race to the Outhouse" By Willie Makit" and last but not least "Guide to One Night Stands" by Juan Teboneya"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man who had been in a depressed state for months. His dog that he''d had since childhood ran away, his fianc ran off the day before their wedding with a woman, he was working a job that was totally unfulfilling, and his house was robbed and his most valuable possesions were plundered. One day, he decided to just end his meaningless existence. He wished to kill himself in the most painful way he could think of. That night, he drove to the zoo, which was closed at that time. The guy simply climbed over the gate at the entrance, unknowingly alerting the half-drunk security officer who was sitting in the ticket window. The man walked over and found the pit where the vicious lions resided. He stood on the edge of the pit and prepared to jump. Before he could, the security officer from before arrived with back-up. He raised his gun and shouted, "Stop, or we''ll shoot!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My cat is crazy. I had just sat down to eat my hot dog when she jumped in my lap. She scared the crap out of me. I mean, I literally screamed. Then I''m like, "Whatever." and I went back to my hot dog. Then I felt something sharp on my fingers. That stupid thing was biting me! Poor thing just wanted some food.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a preacher whose wife was expecting a baby so he went before the congregation and asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher''s family expanded, so would his paycheck. After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the Congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher''s salary. There was much yelling and bickering about how much the preacher''s additional children were costing the church. Finally, the Preacher got up and spoke to the crowd, "Children are a gift from God," he said. Silence fell on the congregation. In the back pew, a little old lady stood up and in her frail voice said, "Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers." And the congregation said, "Amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a group of soldiers stood in formation at an Army Base, the Drill Sergeant said, "All right! All you idiots fall out." As the rest of the squad wandered away, one soldier remained at attention. The Drill Instructor walked over until he was eye-to-eye with him, and then raised a single eyebrow. The soldier smiled and said, "Sure was a lot of ''em, huh, sir?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Platoon Sergeant and his Platoon Leader are bunking down in the field for the night. The Platoon Sergeant looks up and says, "When you see all the stars in the sky, what do you think, sir?" The LT replies, "Well, I think of how insignificant we really are in the universe; how small a piece of such a grand design. I can''t help but wonder if what we do truly means anything or makes any difference. Why? What do you think of, Sergeant?" "I think somebody stole the damn tent."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Well, snarled the tough old Navy Chief to the bewildered Seaman. "I suppose after you get discharged from the Navy, you''ll just be waiting for me to die so you can come and piss on my grave." "Not me, Chief!" the Seaman replied. "Once I get out of the Navy, I''m never going to stand in line again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At one Army base, the annual trip to the rifle range had been cancelled for the second year in a row, but the semi-annual physical fitness test was still on as planned. One soldier mused, "Does it bother anyone else that the Army doesn''t seem to care how well we can shoot, but they are extremely interested in how fast we can run?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The reason the Air Force, Army, Navy and Marines bicker amongst themselves is that they don''t speak the same language. For instance, take the simple phrase "secure the building". The Army will post guards around the place. The Navy will turn out the lights and lock the doors. The Marines will kill everybody inside and set up a headquarters The Air Force will take out a 5 year lease with an option to buy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Army grunt stands in the rain with a 15 kg. pack on his back, 5 kg. weapon in hand, after having marched 15 km, and says, "This sucks." An Army Airborne Ranger stands waist deep in the rain with a 25 kg. pack on his back, weapon in hand, after having jumped from an airplane and marched 30 km, and says with a smile, "This sucks just fine!" A Special Forces soldier lies in the mud, 40 kg pack on his back, weapon in hand, after swimming 10 km to shore, crawling through a swamp and marching 40 km at night past the enemy positions, says with a grin, while biting the head of a snake "This really sucks, I wish it could suck more....." An Air Force Pilot flying over the battlefield, the rain is pouring down, looks down at the soldiers below and says: "Sure sucks down there!" An Air Force officer sits in an easy chair in his air conditioned, carpeted room and says to his friend, "Man.. Cable''s out! This sucks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Irish! Irish who? Irish I could think of a better joke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde was surfing the internet. After a few hours, she decided to have a coffee break. When the blonde came back, she screamed. There was a bug on her moniter! She ran upstairs and grabbed a fly swatter. When she came back down she couldn''t swat the bug. It was to big! The blonde then remembered the label on the computer, for people having technical difficulties. After a while of searching, she found the label. She called the number immediately. "Hello, this is Dell technical difficulties station", a man on the other side said. "Hey, there''s a bug on my monitor, and I tried swatting it, but it won''t come off!" The blonde cried. The man replied, "Well, the solution is simple. You take the mou-" "A mouse won''t eat a bug this big!" the blonde said, cutting the man off. "No, no, no! All you have to do is move the mouse, then the screen saver will turn off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rose, a mother of two boys, Jim and Ralph, heard yelling from upstairs. She heard several phrases like "I got you!" and "No, you didn''t!" She ran to see what the yelling was about. It ended up that the two boys were playing cops and robbers, and were trying to shoot each other with their fingers. "Jim! Haven''t I taught you not to point! Fake guns are no excuse!" "...But mum!" Jim replied after a short pause, "I''m giving him the thumbs up, too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you''ve ever bought a birthday present out of a vending machine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a Redneck if..... 1. Your child''s night-light is a neon beer sign. 2. The only running water in your house comes through the ceiling. 3. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. 4. All your kids toys came free with a Happy Meal. 5. When you fill your car with gas, it''s worth doubles. 6. You start a fight in a bar and your wife finishes it. 7. Your kids favourite bedtime story is "Curious George and the Electric fence" 8. You and your wife''s family reunions are one and the same. 9. The Glamour Shots people give you your money back. and last of all.... You know you''re a redneck if 10.The FBI has more pictures of your family than you do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a legal heir to a fireworks stand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Local cops know you by your nickname.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You get homesick watching cops on TV.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother does not remove the Marlboro from her mouth before telling the state patrolman to kiss her ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your parrot can say, "Open up, it''s the police!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You used a cheat sheet during your hunter''s safety test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your current wife was a bridesmaid at your first wedding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sing this to the tune of "On top of old oaky from "That''s so Raven". On top of Mount Fuji, All covered in blood, I shot poor Barney With a 45 stud. He went to the hospital. He wasn''t quite dead. So I took a machine gun, And blew off his head I went to his funeral. I went to his grave. Some people threw flowers, But i threw a grenade TaDa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(Not for Muffin Man luvers) Do you know the muffin man, the muffin man, the muffin man? Do you know the muffin man who lives on Dreary lane? I just shot the muffin man, the mufifn man, the muffin man. I just shot the muffin man who lives on Dreary Lane. I shot him with a 20 gauge, a 20 gauge, a 20 gauge I shot him with a 20 gauge, and now he''s dead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, in a hospital, a doctor walked into a womans room, looking very serious. "There''s something wrong with your baby", he said. the woman bolted upright. "Tell me! What''s wrong with my baby?" The doctor looked her straight in the eye and told her, "Your child is a hermaphrodite." "A herma-whatta?" she asked. "The baby has the, um, most important parts of both a boy and a girl." The woman turned pale. It was silent for a few moments, and she said, "So, you''re saying its a guy with a brain?!?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t get why we teach little kids the popular saying "Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye." And we wonder what is with all the violence? I mean come on that''s like 100% emo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This couple, my mom is friends with at work, just had a baby. The wife, Emily, told Dave, her husband, there needed to be some cutbacks on beer to save money for diapers and such. Dave was very disapointed, as could be imagined, but realized it was for the good of their child. One afternoon Emily walks through the door, with bags of makeup and pretty clothes. Dave politely asked Emily why she was spending money on cosmetics, and he was restricted from beer. She responded causually, "This is for you honey. It makes me pretty." Naturally, Dave responded, "That''s what the beer was for." Since then, he has been kicked out of the house, and lives in our basement.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('50 Fahrenheit (10 C) Californians shiver uncontrollably. Canadians plant gardens. 35 Fahrenheit (1.6 C) - Italian Cars won''t start. Canadians drive withthe windows down. 32 Fahrenheit (0 C) American water freezes. Canadian water gets thicker. 0 Fahrenheit (-17.9 C) New York City landlords finally turn on the heat. Canadians have the last cookout of the season -60 Fahrenheit (-51 C) Mt. St. Helens freezes. Canadian Girl Guides sell cookies door-to-door. -100 Fahrenheit (-73 C) Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Canadianspull down their ear flaps. -173 Fahrenheit (-114 C) Ethyl alcohol Freezes. Canadians get frustrated when they can''t thaw the keg. -460 Fahrenheit (-273 C) Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops. Canadians start saying "cold, eh?" -500 Fahrenhei t (-295 C) Hell freezes over. The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You think "Going the extra mile" means using toothpaste. You take a bar of soap to your local pool. Your dentures have fillings. Your idea of conservation is moving your Saturday night bath to every other Saturday night. Your wife has ever burnt out an electric razor. Your medical plan is not to get sick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know your a redneck if... You tell your kids the facts of life and they interrupt you with corrections. You''ve ever given your date flowers from a cemetery. You proposed at Denny''s. The biggest compliment you got at your wedding was how cute your baby was. You had a marriage license before you had a drivers license. You''ve ever reused wedding invitations. The last thing your ex-wife ever said to you was "It''s me or them dogs." If your wedding invitations ever said "same time same place." At your wedding reception you put Alka-Seltzer in cheap wine to get "Champagne."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As an insult you could say "You know, most of you weight comes from all that make-up your wearing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are two pick up lines: "Are you a Abercrombie model? Your not?!?!? You so should be!!" or "My friend (insert friend name here) thinks we should go out. Wanna?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Birdie Birdie in the sky, Dropped some white stuff in my eye. I''m a big girl, I won''t cry. I''m just glad that cows don''t fly!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blond and her male co-worker are sitting in the lunch room, and the guy says, "I can''t take anymore today, I am going home!" The blond replies, "You can''t just get up and leave. You''ll be fired!". "Not to worry, I am going to be sent home. I have an idea." the guy says and leaves the room. The blond finishes her lunch and heads back into work, to see her co-worker hanging upside down from the ceiling, yelling over and over, "I''m a lightbulb!". The owner hears this and comes down. He takes one look at the guy, hanging upside down, yelling he is a lightbulb, and sends him home for the rest of the day, with pay, so he can rest, because he has obviously been working to hard. The guy gets down off the ceiling, thanks the owner and leaves. The blond turns around and starts to leave. The owner yells to her, "Hey where the heck do you think you are going?" The blond replies, "I''m going home. You can''t expect me to work in the dark!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I sprayed my dog with spot remover. Now he is gone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill each with a buck and a quarter Jill came down with $2.50. They didn''t go up for water!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man who went to buy some guns. The salesman at the store asked what he wanted to shoot. He said, "Cans" So the salesman asked, "What kind of cans?" "Ameri-cans, Afri-cans,,,,"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a woman have a child, and they need a crib, so they go to a crib factory store. This family is really poor, and they can only find cribs for $300. Then they find a crib for $20. They go up to the cashier and ask why. The cashier says its because it is cursed. The man and woman ask how it is cursed. The cashier replies, "After the 1st week of owning the crib, the mother of the child will die. After the 2nd week of owning the crib the child will die. And after the 3rd week the father of the child will die.(remember that last sentance) The man and woman decide they don''t believe the cashier, so they buy the crib anyway. A week goes by, and the woman dies. The man weeps. Another week goes by, and the child dies. The man weeps even more. Another week goes by, and the man trips over the dead mailman in front of his house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time, when there was a hope for mankind, some blonds appeared in front of a judge. The judge said, "You can either have world peace or keep your cellular phones and get electrocuted." So the blond takes out her cellular phone and the judge says; "What are you doing?" and she simply says; "Im phoning a friend." Now I''m not sure what happened after that because no one saw this blond ever again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes were building a house. One saw that the other was going into her pouch and throwing every other nail out. She thought that this was weird and decided to look into. "Why do you keep throwing every other nail away?" "Well, when I pull one out of my pouch, and it is facing towards the house, I nail it in. If it is facing away from the house, it is defective and I throw it away." "You idiot, those nails aren''t defective, they are for the other side of the house."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it''s raining," he said to his wife. "No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied. "No, I''m sure it was just rain," he said. Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a Communist Party official walking toward them. "Let''s not fight about it," the man said, "Let''s ask Comrade Rudolph whether it''s officially raining or snowing." As the official approached, the man said, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?" "It''s raining, of course," he replied, and walked on. But the woman insisted: "I know that felt like snow!" to which the man quietly replied: "Rudolph the Red, knows rain, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude...?" After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess you''d be eating alone."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many jazz musicians does it take to change a lightbulb? Don''t worry about the changes, we''ll fake it! Note: In jazz, the chord changes are what dictates the improvisation of the music.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wife was in the kitchen making the boiled eggs for breakfast when her husband walked in and asked, "What''s for breakfast?" She turned to him and said, "You''ve got to make love to me this very moment." He, thinking it''s his lucky day, stood her over the kitchen table and they had sex. Afterwards he asked, "What was that all about?" She answered, "The egg timer''s broken!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is running out of his large office building when his boss spots him and asks him what he is doing. The man replies, "My wife called me and she says she is going to jump out our window and commit suicide." The boss realizes that this is a good excuse, but says, "Well, by the time you get home, won''t it be too late?" The man says, "Nah, I''m just going to open the window for her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was stopped at a red light when a fantastic looking blonde pulled up beside him in a really hot Mustang convertible. Trying to start a conversation, the man asked, "Hey,..... how many horses you got under the hood?" The blonde looked at the man bewildered, and replied, "Well,.... there''s one on the left side, one on the right side, ....... and oh yeah, there''s one on the front of the car. I guess there''s only three."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off. "Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally uttered. "Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?" "Didn''t you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!" "Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?" "Didn''t you see the letters ''UFO'' on the side of that vehicle?!" "Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant. "So?" "Don''t you know what ''UFO'' means?!" The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I''ve been working here for five years. Of course I know what ''UFO'' means - it means ''Unleaded Fuel Only''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them? Why do people who know the least know it the loudest? If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off? If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound? When it rains, why don''t sheep shrink? Should vegetarians eat animal crackers? When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in? If you''re cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly." On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?" "Yes," the boy''s mother answered. "And how is your son now?" the psychiatrist asked. "Who cares?" the mother replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Congratulations my boy! said the groom''s uncle. "I''m sure you''ll look back and remember today as the happiest day of your life." "But I''m not getting married until tomorrow," protested his nephew. "I know," replied the uncle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the interval at the Opera when Mrs. Sternberg rose from her seat and called: "Is there a doctor in the house? Is there a doctor in the house?!" A man in a tuxedo pushed his way towards her. "I''m a doctor" he said. "Oh, doctor," she said, "Have I got just the loveliest daughter for you...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A huge black man entered in a bar with a huge and colorful parrot on his shoulder. The bartender was amazed, so he asked "Where did you get that thing?" Then the parrot said, "Well they''re walking all over Africa..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q - Why do women have nipples? A - Because, if they didn''t, boobs would be pointless', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond had a crazy idea one day to skip school, so she decided to try her luck. The day went by fine and she had a good day at the mall. A few days later, she gets a note saying she has to go to the office to talk about the day she was gone. She was very paranoid and afraid of what might happen. When she got to the office the counselor asked her to sit down, and said, "You never picked up your pictures that we gave out on the day you were absent." The blond replies, "Oh, is that all you called me down for? I thought you had found out I skipped school that day!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy came to Sunday School late. His teacher knew that he was usually very prompt so she asked, "Johnny, is there anything wrong"? The boy replied, "No, I was going fishing but my dad told me that I needed to go to church". The teacher was very impressed and asked Johnny if his dad had explained to him why it was more important to go to church than to go fishing. Johnny replied, "Yes teacher, Dad said he didn''t have enough bait for both of us".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she farted and caused global warming', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if for your prom you wore a strapless dress but wore a bra that wasn''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, there was a powerful slide, and when you go down on it, you wish for something and you get it. One guy goes down the slide, and says, "A pot of gold," and he gets it. Another guy goes down and says, "A pot of silver," and he gets it. The third guy says, "Weeee," and he gets a pot of wee!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time, my teacher said to dump our Math books. Then she said to get your Social Studies book. Then that became history.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy, "So I hear you''re getting married?" "Yep!" "Do I know her?" "Nope!" "This woman, is she good looking?" "Not really." "Is she a good cook?" "Naw, she can''t cook too well." "Does she have lots of money?" "Nope! Poor as a church mouse." "Well, then, is she good in bed?" "I don''t know." "Why in the world do you want to marry her then?" "Because she can still drive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You''re really doing great, aren''t you?" Morris replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc, ''Get a hot momma and be cheerful.''" The doctor said, "I didn''t say that. I said, ''You''ve got a heart murmur; be careful.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?" "No," he replied, "Arthritis."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so old, I woke up the other morning and thought I had an erection. I was really happy until I realized it was just a leg cramp!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once I asked a guy, " Do you love me, or is that a banana in your pocket?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you think cauliflower is a phone dating service for flowers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve tried to quote Jeff Foxworthy and screwed it up. You name your car the General Lee. You see a sign that says "bridge out" and you try to jump it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence. Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor''s Degree and the woman gets her Masters. Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman''s finger and two under the man''s eyes. Marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit. Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always wondered why there are so many blond jokes,but no brunettes. I asked a brunette friend of mine. "Why do you think there are no brunette jokes?" I asked her. "Well,that''s a given. Blonds are too stupid to make them up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock,knock! Who''s there? King! King who? King Kong is now part of China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a circle so hot???? Because it''s 360 degrees!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient:"Doctor,my wife thinks I''m crazy because I like sausages." Psychiatrist: "Rubbish! I like sausages too." Patient: Good,you should come and see my collection. I''ve got hundreds."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: "Does it hurt when you do this?" Patient: "Yes" Doctor: "Well, you shouldn''t do it then."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? A chu. A chu who? Bless you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why wasn''t the giraffe invited to the party? He was a pain in the neck to talk to.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Driving to work, a gentleman had to swerve to avoid a box that fell out of a truck in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another officer had seen the carton in the road. The policmen stopped traffic and recovered the box. It was found to contain large upholstery tacks. "I''m sorry sir," the first trooper told the driver, "but I am still going to have to write you a ticket." Amazed, the driver asked for what. The trooper replied, "Tacks evasion."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a black man from jumping on your bed? -Put velcro on the ceiling. Why don''t black people dream anymore? -Because the last one that did got shot. How do you keep five black men from raping a white woman? -Give them a basketball. What do you call black ladies'' abortions? -Crimestoppers What do you say if you see your tv floating in the middle of the night? -"Drop it nigga!" Whats wrong with four Mexicans dying in an Impala? -An Impala can hold five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you name your kids after dead family pets you just might be a redneck!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl was eating lunch in the cafeteria and she was laughing and talking to all friends. But as you know, it is very distracting to talk while you''re eating. So she goes to put a french fry into her mouth and before anyone notices, she looks down because, you guessed it, she missed her mouth. Turns out everyone at the table had seen her do it. As the table bursts out laughing, someone says, "I do that all the time. I go to take a drink of water and I miss." Someone else said, "You have a hole in your lip." From the other end of the table someone yells "Who has a whore on their cheek?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is amazing how politicians can fit all their good points in a 30 second TV commercial.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes in an adult book store and asks for an inflatable doll. Guy behind the counter says, "Male or female?" Customer says, "Female." Counter guy asks, "Black or white?" Customer says, "White." Counter guy asks, "Radical Christian or Muslim Extremist?" Customer says, "What the hell does religion have to do with it?" Counter guy says, "The Muslim Extremist blows itself up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only in America can a poor black boy turn into a rich white woman... (Michael Jackson)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Only in America can a President have relations in the oral office', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you met your wife on a hunting trip you just might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young naval student was being put through the paces by an old sea captain. "What would you do if a sudden storm sprang up on the starboard?" "Throw out an anchor, sir," the student replied. "What would you do if another storm sprang up aft?" "Throw out another anchor, sir." "And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do then?" asked the captain. "Throw out another anchor, sir." "Hold on," said the captain. "Where are you getting all those anchors from?" "From the same place you''re getting your storms, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, that when I went to her house, a roach tripped me and a rat took my wallet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, that when she fell in love , people wern''t laughing but the floor was cracking up!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you have more pets than relatives you just might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q - Why is there a big "E" on top of the standard eye chart at the optometrist''s office? A - The reason is if there was a big "O" on the chart women would lie about seeing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q - What do barbed wire and a thong have in common? A - Both protect the property, but neither obstruct the view.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do men pick their noses while driving? Because their butts are too hard to reach!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a tribe of very hostile Indians who, upon catching a person on their land, would cut the person up and make a canoe out of them. One day, three men were walking through the woods when they wandered upon the canoe-making Indian''s land. They were all caught and given one death wish. The man from Italy said, "I would like one last slice of pizza before I die." So he ate his pizza and was cut up and made into a canoe. The man from America said, "I would like one last hamburger before I die." So he ate his hamburger and was cut up and made a canoe. The last man asked for a fork. "What the hell - a fork??!!! Why the hell do you want a fuckin fork???" But they got him a fork, anyways. The man took the fork and began stabbing himself with it, saying, "YER NOT MAKIN A CANOE OUT OF ME!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. When you are older, you will settle for being the master of your weight and the captain of your bowling team.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a man from the city who was visiting a small farm, and during this visit he saw a farmer feeding pigs in a most extraordinary manner. The farmer would lift a pig up to a nearby apple tree, and the pig would eat the apples off the tree directly. The farmer would move the pig from one apple to another until the pig was satisfied, then he would start again with another pig. The city man watched this activity for some time with great astonishment. Finally, he could not resist saying to the farmer, "This is the most inefficient method of feeding pigs that I can imagine. Just think of the time that would be saved if you simply shook the apples off the tree and let the pigs eat them from the ground!" The farmer looked puzzled and replied, "What''s time to a pig?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The arithmetic teacher had written 10.9 on the blackboard and had then rubbed out the decimal point to show the effect of multiplying this number by ten. "Johnny," the teacher asked, "where is the decimal point now?" "On the eraser!" came back the quick reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ralph''s father said, "Let me see your report card." Ralph replied, "I don''t have it." "Why not?" His father asked. "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kevin attended a horse auction with his father, watching as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse''s legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Kevin asked, "Dad, why are you doing that?" His father replied, "Because when I''m buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy." Looking worried, Kevin said, "Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Phillip''s teacher asks him, "Can you name the Great Lakes?" Phillip, always fast with an answer, pipes up with, "I don''t need to. They''ve already been named."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary had a little lamb! The doctor fainted!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q :whats the best thing about children? A :making them!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde got an invitation to a party which said "Wear brown tie only!" After going to the party, she noticed that they were wearing pants and shirts also!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so old, that she cooked the last supper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so ugly that even Ripley''s couldn''t believe it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? You! You who? What are you so happy about?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young husband with an inferiority complex insisted he was just a little pebble on a vast beach. The marriage counselor, trying to be creative, told him, "If you wish to save your marriage, you''d better be a little boulder."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Like I said before, I never repeat myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes home after a party drunk. When he interrogates his wife about who she is, she replies, "I''m your wife! Did you forget me?" The man says, "Sorry, drinking makes me forget my pain."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so bad my imaginary friend left me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the piece of gum cross the road? Because it was stuck to the chicken''s foot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know why there are no Wal-Marts in Iraq? Because there are so many Targets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Director said to the actress: "You have to jump from 100 feet into a swimming pool." Actress: "But I dont know how to swim." Director: "I know, that''s why I removed all the water from the swimming pool."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engine driver was taken to court because he derailed a train. The judge asked, "Why did you derail the train?" The engine driver replied, "A man ran in front of the tracks." The judge replied, "You are a fool. You derailed a train and killed hundreds of people just because of one man, you should have killed him by running the train over him." The driver replied, "I tried to, but before I could run the train over him he moved away from the tracks so I just turned the train to run the train over him!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you find a blonde in a submarine? A: Simple, she would be the only one with a parachute on!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GOOD JOKE: A blonde. BETTER JOKE: A blonde playing chess. BEST JOKE: The blonde wins the game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the blonde say after seeing the banana on the ground? A: Oh, I''m gonna slip again!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man asked a woman,"Will you marry me?" The woman replied,"No." They both lived happily ever after!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('you''ve ever called the towtruck on yourself because you couldn''t afford gas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What 3 words are in the name Amanda? A, man, DUH!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you wore a jumper to your prom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your swimsuit is your bra and underwear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to Google Translater to write something to my friend in German. I typed in English: Hey there! I am bored. What do you want to do? It came out in German: Hey dort! ich werde gebohrt, was Sie tun mchten? If I translate it back into English, it comes out: Hey there! I am bored, which you would like to do? I don''t want to do anyone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My 4 year old brother just had a birthday. At his birthday party he invited all his friends and a clown for the entertainment. The clown didn''t have too many options for entertaining 4 year olds, so he figured a nice game of Simon Says would be fun. "Simon says, ''Point to your nose.''" The children all do it and he continues. "Simon says, ''Point to your head.''" Again they all do. "Sit down." All those who sat down are out. "Simon says, ''Point to your lip.''" Trying to end this silly game and go on with his pathetic life, "Point to your eye." "OWWWWW!!!" Yep. They lost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Umm...why is this category called "blond" when really it''s spelled "blonde"??', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The 1st blonde says-"I hate you!I never want to see you again." The smarted 2nd twin says-"You idiot!Then don''t look in the mirror!" The 1st says-"Why can''t I look in the mirror?" The 2nd says-"Because we''re twins and we look exactly the same!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is orange, red, and lies in the grass? A: A wounded cheesie!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the baby ant afraid of his uncles? Because his uncles were all ants!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Socrates is walking down the road and sees his old friend Uripedes carrying a pair of pants. Socrates says "Hi, Uripedes" Uripidees says "I sure did, Usodes?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I''ll serve you, but don''t start anything." 2. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either. 3. Deja Moo: The feeling that you''ve heard this bull before. 4. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn''t find any. 5. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can''t feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can''t - I''ve cut off your arms!" 6. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1: Fatten every one around you to make them look bigger. You''ll look thinner 2: If no-one sees you eat it, it has no calories. 3: Drink a diet soda with your candy bar. They''ll cancel each other out. 4: Life''s short, eat dessert first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you say constipated in German? farfrompoopin', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many roadies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 2. One to try to hammer it in with a microphone, and another to find a cable to plug that microphone in. Q: How many union members does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: If we do screw in that light bulb, it''ll be a 4 hour minimum on the payroll. Q: How many sound techs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: None. That''s the light guy''s job. Q: How many lighting techs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: IT''S A LAMP!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she brought the jigsaw puzzle back to the store because she thought it was broken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, there were three young men named Poop, Manners and Shutup, and one day they were riding their bikes when Poop fell off his bike, so Manners went to help Poop, while Shutup went to the police. When Shutup arrived at the police station, he said, "Quick! My friend fell off his bike!" So the police said, "Let''s start at the beginning. What''s your name?" then Shutup said, "Shutup" (because that was his name.) But the police didn''t understand, so he said, "Where''s your manners?" Shutup said "Picking up Poop!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a child named Laura. She asked her mom what the hardest report she ever had to do was. Her mom said, "It was to write an essay on the belly of a frog." Laura said, "Wow!!How did you get the frog in to the typewriter?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once,there was a teacher and a girl named Wendy.The teacher asked for Wendy to say a sentence starting with the word I. So wendy started to say I is....Then the teacher said, "No Wendy, it is I am." So Wendy said, "I am the ninth letter if the alphabet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man was watching a show that shows how people make candy bars (by the way he has one in his hand). About halfway through the show, his son comes in asks him if he could ask him a question. The man says yes so his son asks him, "Where can most criminals be found?" The Man answers, "Behind candy bars" "My point exactly," the son replies. (The son found 12 dollars to missing the day before and his father was the only who could take it given the circumstances at the time.) A couple weeks later the man finds many of his personal items go missing. Then, one day when found his watch missing and he realizes his son took it. So the man waited until his son took out a candy bar for dessert after dinner and then he asks him, "Where can most criminals be found?" "Behind Bars," replies his son thinking, *No DUH!!!? How dumb does he think I am?* "Candy Bars to be exact," his father adds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Matt: I bet you can''t spell "I cup." Sarah: I C-U-P Matt: Eww! You see me pee!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the husband ask the wife before they were married to find her own friends for life? Because like most marriages he knows they will hate each other one day and she will need help from her friends or she commit suicide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were a boy and your parents named you dick. Wouldn''t you be embarassed and change your name officially?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now I lay me down to sleep With the boy across the street Won''t my mommy be surprised When my tummy starts to rise Won''t my daddy be disgusted When he finds my cherry''s busted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy go to a girls house and notice her home is very messy and full of paper and clay pot and clothing all over. The boy tell her he bring some pot to her and she answer there is clay pot all over home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so dumb everytime she hears a car horn she yells "Happy New Year!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat they show IMAX movies on her butt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call 2 lesbians in a cupboard? A: A liquor cabinet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes into a bar and orders a beer, He drinks it, and 5 minutes later orders another. This goes on for 2 hours straight, the guy ordering a beer every 5 minutes or so. After 2 hours the guy has had 24 beers and is pretty drunk. The bartender looks at the guy and says, "How did you do that/" The guy responds, "It''s no problem. You just chug ''em back." Bartender; "Not the drinking part, I mean how did you drink 24 beers without going to the bathroom?" The guy says, "Depends"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is marriage so much like a tornado? At first there is a lot of huffing and blowing, in the end someone loses their house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who ran for president? She got tired after 2 miles and dropped out of the running.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the kid like the bowl of carrots and peas? Because he could eat every carrot and pea in the bowl.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a guy is a "chick magnet", and opposites attract, doesn''t that make him gay?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10) Hum or sing when ever possible. 9) Always chew with your mouth open. 8) Pretend to fly around the room. 7) Have fights with your imaginary friends. 6) At school, fall asleep in every class. 5) When people turn around, make faces. 4) Scream every 10 minutes. 3) Tell every one you have a twin and then pretend to be the twin. 2) Say, ''I don''t know.'' when you are asked a question, no matter what the question is. 1) Tap your pencil on every surface.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You momma is so stupid, she went to the Clippers game to get a haircut!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond in a mathematics test encountered this problem Find X This was her answer i i \ i \ 14.6578i \ i \ X________ Here it is i \ i \ i \ i \ i_________\ 12.76', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Amy: Yesterday I saw a man in the mall with very long arms. Every time he went up the stairs he would step on them. Bob: Wow... He stepped on his arms? Amy: No. On the STAIRS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: If the world was a jacket where would the people from the ghetto go? Answer:In da Hood!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Might Be a Redneck if you have a pond full of gasoline and a car wreck in the bottom of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t niggers like dirt bikes? Because when it starts, it says: "Run nigga nigga run."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A baby was born that was so advanced that he could talk. He looked around the delivery room and saw the doctor. "Are you my doctor?" he asked. "Yes, I am." The baby said, "Thank you for taking such good care of me during birth." He looked at his mother and asked, "Are you my mother?" "Yes, I am," she said. "Thank you for taking such good care of me before I was born," he said. He then looked at his father and asked, "Are you my father?" "Yes, I am," his father answered. The baby motioned him to come closer, then poked him on the forehead with his index finger 5 times, saying, "I want you to know that THAT HURTS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Go to this website ... I know some people might say that this isn''t a joke, but it''s really funny if you go to the website. Trust me. http://www.dr-joe.net/quiz.html It doesn''t have any viruses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Go to this website ... I know some people might say that this isn''t a joke, but it''s really funny if you go to the website. Trust me. It doesn''t have any viruses. http://home.comcast.net/~wolfand/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a money-making seminar. This man had so much bling he sparkled. I could tell he knew how to make money. He was telling the story of how he worked his way up the corporate ladder from a lowly mail boy, to cubicle, to corner office, to the president of his own very successful business. He went on to tell the whole process of sucking up to the bosses and such. Anyway the way he made most of his money was with his own business. It wasn''t persay the way he ran it but the idea behind it. He mass producted one product but sold it as two. He made long rubber open ended cylinders and sold them as a box of 12 condoms for $6 and he sold a bag of balloons for $3. The man was a genius...pure genius...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A smart blonde, a leprachaun and a fairy were in an elevator together talking about something, but whatever they were talking about was not true because there is no such thing as a leprechaun or a fairy or a smart blonde.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom: How did you do on your history test? Kid: Not good. Mom: Why? Kid: They asked me things that happened before I was born!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t elephants smoke? Their butts don''t fit in the ash tray', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An older couple are playing in the annual golf club championship. They are playing in a play off hole and it is down to a 6 inch putt that the wife has to make. She takes her stance and her husband can see her trembling. She putts and misses; they lose the match. On the way home in the car her husband is fuming, "I can''t believe you missed that putt! That putt was no longer than my ''willy''." The wife just looked over at her husband and smiled and said, "Yes dear, but it was much harder!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the condom fly across the room A: It was pissed off!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women were shopping. When they started to discuss their home lives, one said, "Seems like all Alfred and I do anymore is fight. I''ve been so upset I''ve lost 20 pounds." "Why don''t you just leave him then?" asked her friend. "Oh! Not yet." the first replied, "I''d like to lose at least another fifteen pounds first."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse. "I know that smart aleck Tex," said the first. "He''s going to start bragging about that new foreign car he bought as soon as he gets back." "Not Tex," the second cowboy replied. "He''ll always be just a good ol'' boy. When he walks in, I''m sure all he''ll say is hello." "I know Tex better than either of you," said the third. "He''s so smart, he''ll figure out a way to do both. Here he comes now." Tex swung open the bunkhouse door and shouted, "Audi, partners!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a horny ghost say to scare people? BOO...BS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, my parents were driving, and they wanted a cup of tea, so they drove to a cafe. When they ordered, a horse walked in and sat at the table across from them. The horse then ordered a cup of coffe. My parents thought it was a bit strange, so they asked the waitress if this was normal, and the waitress said, "No, he usually orders lemonade."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a wife and a prostitute? Prostitute is cheaper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am sure everyone has heard the saying "If it ain''t broke, don''t fix it." Well, I have improved on this saying so that it applies to my life, and here it is. "If it ain''t broke, it ain''t ours!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Max: Here I am, once again! I''m torn into pieces...can''t deny it, can''t pretend! Just thought you were the one! Broken up, deep inside. But you don''t get to see these tears I cry....BEHIND THESE HAZEL EYES! Bailey: So, wha''d you do with the money? Max: What money??? Bailey: The money your mom gave you for voice lessons!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and says "Bartender, give me a triple shot of Jack!". The bartender pours, and the man downs it, slams the glass on the bar, and says, "Another". The bartender pours another. The man downs it and says, "Another". As the bartender pours the third glass he says, "Mister you drink like you have a problem. Want to talk about it?" The man says, "Ten years I''ve been married to my wife, and today I go home a little early to surprise her, and I find my best friend, MY BEST FRIEND, in bed having sex with her." The bartender says "Geez, what did you say?." The man says " I told him, BAD DOG! BAD DOG!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to a new bar at the top of a skyscraper and over by the counter she sees an attractive man. She keeps her eye on him as she orders a drink, and she sees the man take a shot and jump out the window. She''s so shocked she can''t speak, but moments later he walks back into the bar. He goes back to the counter, orders another shot, takes it and jumps out the window. Sure enough moments later he walks back into the bar again, completely unharmed. She walks over to him and says, "I''ve been watching you, and I''ve got to ask what is going on. We''re thirty stories up!" He leans over and passes her a shot, "If you take a shot of this, you can fly." So she takes the shot, jumps out the window, and plummets to her death. The bartender looks over and says "Superman, you''re a real asshole when you drink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Bob were mischievous brothers. They always picked fights with each other. One day, their mother told them to go outside and play, but to remember to be good. Suddenly, Bob came running back in and said, "Mommy! Mommy! Bill broke Ms. Allen''s window!" Ms. Allen was their next door neighbor. Their mom was shocked. "Tell me, Bob. How did Bill break her window?" Bob puffed out his chest and said accusingly, "I threw a rock at him and he dodged!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she joined MySpace and there was no room for anyone else. Yo momma is so fat, she tried uploading her picture to a computer, but the C: Drive filled up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was a Typo from Jack-in-the-Box 1. Come in for our new Chihuahua (Chibatta, Don''t ask.)Sandwich. 2. Newspaper Look ravished (ravishing) for your big day. 3. Church Newsletter Come tonight to see famous missionary Bobby Belch. Come hear Bobby Belch from Africa. 4. Sunday School Lesson: Jesus Walks on Water Tonight''s Lesson: Finding Jesus 5. Tonight''s Sermon: "What is Hell?" Come early to listen to our choir perform.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said, "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?" To which the farmer replied, "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TRUE STORY I was working in a restaurant for several years. On a very busy night, I was helping out with the seating. I showed seats to a party of four and when I went to give them the menus, I realised we only had one menu left. As I placed the menu in front of one of them and told the other three that I would get them menus soon, they began laughing. They told me that the woman that I gave the menu to was blind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TRUE STORY My boyfriend decided to invite me over to his home one day. When I arrived, I was hoping we would be alone. When I got in, it was dark, except for the room we were in and I couldn''t hear any noise, so I guessed we were. We started to make out until he grabbed my hand and brought me upstairs, covering my eyes and saying; "I have a surprise for you, why don''t you make yourself a little more comfortable." Of course, I took that as a hint that he wanted sex, and he left saying he''d be back in five minutes. So I took off my clothes, sitting on his bed. Five minutes later, he called me to come out into the room next door to his room. I walked out proudly and walked into another room naked... and saw three shocked faces looking upon my body. He didnt tell me the surprise was he wanted me to meet his parents!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Perfect breasts (o)(o) Silicone breasts ( + )( + ) Perky breasts (*)(*) Big nipple breasts (@)(@) A cups o o D cups { O }{ O } Wonder bra breasts (oYo) Cold breasts ( ^ )( ^ ) Lopsided breasts (o)(O) Pierced Breasts (Q)(O) Hanging Tassels Breasts (p)(p) Grandma''s Breasts \ o /\ o / Against The Shower Door Breasts ( )( ) Android Breasts | o | | o | Mamogram Breasts (_)(_) Martha Stewart''s Breasts ($)($)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After years of hiding the fact that the love is gone, Mom and Dad announced to their grown children that they''re getting a divorce. The kids were totally distraught and, as a stab at keeping their parents together, arranged a series of sessions for the whole family with a world-famous marriage counselor. The counselor worked for hours, tried all of his methods and tricks, but the parents wouldn''t even talk to each other. Finally, he walked over to a closet, brought out an oboe, and began to play. After a minute or so, the parents started talking and, as the counselor continued soloing on the oboe, the couple discovered they''re not that far apart and decided to give their marriage another try. The children were amazed and asked the counselor how he managed to do it. He replied, "Simple. I''ve never seen a couple that wouldn''t talk through an oboe solo."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so covered in dirt that if you wanted to eat a tootsie roll, you''d have to wear white gloves to keep from biting your finger!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down, unless you''re a diabetic!!!!! 2. People who live in glass houses should have sex in their basements!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Roses are red, violets are blue, If I can use technology, why can''t you? The sky is blue, the grass is green, why is your brain as small as a lima bean? Your humorous, funny, have OCD, How come you can''t use technology without me? I love you, I love you, I really do, but roses are red and violets are blue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy(howling): A crab just bit my toe! Father: Which one? Boy: How should I know?!?!?! All crabs look alike to me!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''How long will the next bus be?'' ''About eighteen feet.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Can you name four animals of the cat family? Mary:Mother cat,Father cat,and two kittens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: Mrs Smith, you have acute angina. Mrs. Smith: I came here to be examined, not admired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: If you found five pence in one pocket and ten pence in the other,what would you have? Willy: Somebody else''s trousers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus walks into an inn puts 3 nails on the counter and asks, "Can you put me up for the night?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly patient needed a heart transplant and discussed options with his doctor. The doctor said, "We have three possible donors. The first is a young, healthy athlete who died in an automobile accident. The second is a middle-aged businessman who never drank or smoked and who died flying his private jet. The third is an attorney who died after practicing law for 30 years. Which do you want?" "I''ll take the attorney''s heart," said the patient. After a successful transplant, the doctor asked the patient why he had chosen the donor he did. "It was easy," said the patient, "I wanted a heart that hadn''t been used."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of triangle is never wrong??? A right triangle!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of trouble does a five foot man have??? Five feet!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat she''s fatter than you', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is a cat''s favorite game? A: Go Fish!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dark, she''s not afraid of the dark, the dark is afraid of her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so stupid, on Halloween she looked ouside the window and said, "Oh, no!" and called the Ghost Busters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma is so fat, your dad rolled on her and never came off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat, the only reason she wanted to go to space was to taste the Milky Way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do fish keep their money? In a riverbank!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a a bunch of fish swimming in the sky?? A High School!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat and stupid that I told her to show me a pushup and she brought me one from the Ice Cream Man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Why do we sometimes call the middle ages as the dark ages? Betty: Because they had so many knights.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: When is a black dog not a black dog? A: When its a grey hound.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know Davy Crockett had three ears? No, how was that? He had a right ear,a left ear,and a wild frontier.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do the monsters go when they lose a hand? To the second-hand shop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between unlawful and illegal? Unlawful is against the law. Illegal is a sick bird.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Farmer: This is a dogwood tree. Cityman: How can you tell? Farmer: By its bark', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. Who''s there? Isabel. Isabel who? Is-a-bel ringing? I thought I heard one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat, when she breast-fed you, you drank bacon grease.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Puffy say when Ben asked him about J-LO ? "Take that, take that"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Wizards don''t use lightbulbs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What math term tells what acorns say when they are a tree??? Geometry!! (Geo-m-e-try) (Gee I''m a tree)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your dad is Santa Claus and your mom is A HO HO HO!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Knock Knock! -Who''s there? -You know. -You know who? -Thats right, avada kedavra!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 25999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I love it when you go down on me... you relieve so much tension and stress... but when you''re making me feel really good, you come back up... Stupid gas prices...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day I went to a zoo, but the only animal there was a dog. It was a shihtzu.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat she should get cingular on her stomach so she can get rollover minutes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy:- "Hello, is that 77 77 77? Can you call 911, my finger is stuck in the 7"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you have only one egg for breakfast? Because un oeuf is enough!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: Do you know the difference between a chicken and lettuce? Jill: No. Joe: Remind me not to send you to the supermarket!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Buck Fush', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t believe in reincarnation, which is strange, because in a previous existence, I did.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You used to have two brains. One you lost a long time ago, and the other one went looking for it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so poor she had to save up to pay attention!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: how many men does it take to screw in a light bulb A: 3, one to screw in the light bulb an 2 to listen to him brag about the "srewing" part', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kurt and Megan (a blonde) were bored in math class and one day when they decided to play "The Calculator Game". I''m sure many people reading this remember it - it''s the one where you enter "1 + 1 =" into your calculator and continue pressing the "=" sign. The goal is to see who can get to the highest number while the math teacher is talking. Bring back any memories? Anyways, Kurt and Megan waited until the teacher started talking, and the contest was on! Fingers were pushing the "=" sign like mad. A hour and a half later, Kurt and Megan compared results. Kurt showed his number: 5,318,008. Megan said, "I don''t get it. I was feeling so clever and I thought I''d play a trick on you, but I''m still at 1!!!" "Well, what trick did you play?" Said Kurt. Megan said, "I know that multiplication makes numbers bigger than addition does, so instead of pushing 1 + 1 =, =, =, =, ..., I pushed 1 x 1 = = = = =..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Enter this old elementary school story onto your calculator fun a cheap laugh - the numbers or signs that you should enter are in quotes. Once upon a time, there was an old lady who was "69" years old. She had always thought that her boobs were "222" (too too too) big. So she went to "51" (fifty-first) street to see Doctor "X" "8" times. When she came back, she was...*turn calculator upside-down and read*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat and stupid, when she stepped on the scale she went running to me saying "Look! Look! The scale talks!" I dropped my purse onto it to test this theory and it said, "hI" in the area where the numbers usually show up. Yo momma said, "See!? When I stepped on it, it said, ''hELLO!''" I told her, "The scale''s upside-down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Whats usually used as the conductor of electricity? Orville: Why-er.... Teacher: Correct, wire. Now tell me, what is the unit of electrical power? Orville: The what? Teacher: That''s absolutely right, the watt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Oscar, if you had five pieces of candy, and Joey asked for one, how many would you have left? Oscar: Five.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: If you stood with your back to the north and faced due south, what would be on your left hand? Lisa: Fingers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the secret of success? "push" said the doorbell "never be lead" said the pencil "Take panes" said the window "always keep cool" said the ice "never lose your head" said the drum "make light of everything" said the fire "be sharp in all your dealings" said the knife "find a good thing and stick to it" said the glue', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good luck turns into bad luck when you call the credit card company to tell them they made a mistake on your bill..... and they agree because they didn''t charge you enough. Good luck turns into bad luck when the cutest boy rings you up.... then apologies because he dialed the wrong number.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiter, why is my food all mushed up? -Well, you did ask me to step on it. Waiter, these eggs are bad. -Don''t blame me. I only laid the table. Waiter, is there soup on my menu? -No, I wiped it off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats faster than a speeding bullet, more powerfull than a locomotive, able to leap tall buildings and has a carpark? Super market', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('University scientists have released the results of a recent analysis that reveals the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. It turns out that the "hops" in beer contain certain phyto-estrogens, and scientists believe that be drinking enough beer, men may turn into women. In the study, 100 male volunteers were asked to drink 8 pints of beer in one hour. The results were observed and recorded. At the end of one hour, every single subject had developed female characteristics and the test was terminated. The data is provided below: After one hour, 100% of the test subjects: 1. gained weight. 2. talked excessively without making sense. 3. became overly emotional. 4. couldn''t drive. 5. failed to think rationally. 6. argued over nothing. 7. had to sit down while urinating. 8. refused to apologize when obviously wrong. After these eight symptoms, no further testing was necessary.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a certified true story. One of the instructors at the local training centre decided to try to pull the leg of one the labourers who worked there. He told the lad, who lived in a little fishing port about 12 miles away, that there was a job coming available soon in his home town. The lad asked what job this was, and was told that the job was not very arduous, but paid good money because it involved unsocial hours, going out to the end of the 679 meter pier twice a day and telling the tide when it was time to come in. "You must think I''m soft", he said, and the boys thought he''d twigged, only for him to restore their faith in his stupidity - "That sort of job is handed down from father to son; I''ve no chance",he says!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a very simple way to explain the theory of mind over matter. Once you lose you mind, nothing matters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man who stands on toilet is high on pot. Man with face in toilet is shit faced. Man who fools around with neighbour''s wife at wrong time of month get caught red handed. Man who fart in church sit in own pew.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you kill a circus? Go for the juggler!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A complex is a phobia. A complex is a large building. A complex is another word for complicated. So if you have a phobia about complicated large buildings, you might be said to have a complex complex complex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy: i know a person who is 35 and still in 4th grade! Eddie: Really! who? Billy: My teacher!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It must suck being a penis because- 1. Your best friends are nuts 2. Your closest neighbour is an asshole 3. You vomit when you''re excited 4. Your owner abuses you And if you''re in the mood- 5. You work double-duty on Tuesday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Tony was staying with his grandmother for a few days. He''d been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the house and asked her, "Grandma, what is that called when two people are sleeping in the same room and one is on top of the other?" She was a little taken aback, but decided to tell him the truth. "It''s called sexual intercourse, darling." Little Tony just said, "Oh, okay." and went back outside to talk and play with the other kids. A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, "Grandma, it is not called sexual intercourse! It''s called bunk beds! Oh, Jimmy''s mom wants to talk to you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the fish say when he swam into a concrete wall? Dam!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mamma is so thin when she turns sidways she dissapears', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do the chinese get their names? Their parents kick a can down the street... ching chang chung bing....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a blonde who looks stupid in her ear muffs? Anything you want! She cant hear you! P.S. no offence to blondes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the fish say when he crashed into a wooden wall? Beaver damn!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if you find your old man staggering around the backyard? Shoot him again!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your face is so ugly, we''re going to war over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s a pick up line in a gay bar?? A: Would you like me to push your stool in?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your face is so oily, we''re going to war over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('your mom is like paris hilton ... a dirty whore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the chicken cross the road? To prove he was chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, when I went to her house to use the bathroom, she told me to pick a corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your floor is so dirty, I stepped inside and said "Nice carpet." You said, "Man, those are cockroaches!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time I went school shopping... AND BOUGHT THREE SCHOOLS!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so cheap, she went to McDonalds and put a hamburger on lay-away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s breath smells so bad, her teeth packed up and left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you work without a shirt on, and so does your husband, you might be a redneck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('one of my friends was in trouble because he had sex with his teacher, but the bad part is he''s home schooled', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she jumped out the window and fell up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, I got stuck in her shadow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bloke stayed up all night, wondering where the sun had gone; then it dawned on him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:How many egotists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just one. He holds up the lightbulb while the rest of the world revolves around him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother and I were sitting at the computer reading the daily teaser from the past week. I read the last one (April 30th 2006) and my sister(who is a blonde) walks in to get a drink. I''m reading a line that says:"But, madam!", replied the bellman, and my sister walks up behind me and says "What did you call me?!" and I say, "Well I didn''t call you any thing. I was reading this joke and she says, "Oh well I thought you were calling me a damn bitch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My home town is so small, we have part-time village idiot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like a lollipop, she is round and has been licked by everyone', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she thought Fruit Punch was a gay boxer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so dumb, she was on her way to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport Left" so she turned around and went home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so stupid, she has a peep hole in the glass door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so short, she stepped in a puddle and drowned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, she has never seen 50 cent--and ! ain''t talkin about the rapper!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was about a month ago when a man in Amsterdam felt that he needed to confess, so went to his priest: "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. During WWII I hid a refugee in my attic." "Well," answered the priest, "that''s not a sin." "But I made him agree to pay me 20 Gulden for every week he stayed." "I admit that wasn''t good, but you did it for a good cause." "Oh, thank you, Father; that eases my mind. I have one more question..." "What is that, my son?" "Do I have to tell him the war is over?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, she reuses her toilet paper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, on her drivers'' license it says, "picture continued onto other side."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blonde decided to build a brick wall, so she went to a home depot. While a worker was walking down an aisle, he saw the blonde walking around in circles looking confused, so he went over and asked her what she wanted to make. She answered that she wanted to make a brick wall. Then the worker asked her what size; after thinking thoroughly she answered, "And they say blondes are stupid; how am I supposed to know? There is no fence to measure."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come you''re late? asks the bartender as the blonde waitress walks in the door. "It was awful," she explains. "I was walking down Elm street and there was this terrible accident. A man was lying in the middle of the street. He''d been thrown from his car. His leg was broken, his skull was fractured, and there was blood everywhere. Thank God I took that first-aid course and all my training came back to me in a minute." "What did you do?" asks the bartender. "I sat down and put my head between my knees to keep from fainting!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left." Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don''t worry, we can fly just fine on two engines." An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours. But don''t worry, we still have one engine left." A young blonde passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we''ll be up here all day!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She sent me a fax with a stamp on it. -She tripped over the cordless phone. -She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. -She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. -At the bottom of the application where is says "Sign here", she wrote Sagittarius. -If she spoke her mind, she''d be speechless. -When she heard that 90% of all crimes were around the home, she moved. -She got an AM radio. It took her 9 months to figure out that she could use it at night. -She stood staring at the frozen orange juice because it said "Concentrate".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael Jackson and his wife are in the recovery room with their new baby son. The doctor walks in and Michael asks: "Doctor, how long before we can have sex?" The doctor replies, "I''d wait until he''s at least 14."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she thinks N*SYNC is where the dirty dishes are put.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so hunchbacked, she has to wear safety goggles when she pees.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she wore an X-Files T-shirt and a helicopter landed on her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she got fired from an M&M factory for throwing away all the W''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat even Bill Gates couldn''t pay for her liposuction!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she fell over trying to rock herself to sleep and couldn''t get back up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so ugly, she had to trick-or-treat over the phone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so dumb she asked for a price check at the .99 cent store!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sky was dark The moon was high We were alone Just she and I Her hair was brown Her eyes were too I knew just what She wanted to do So with my courage I did my best And placed my hand Upon her breast I trembled and shook And felt her heart Slowly she spread Her legs apart I knew she was ready But I didn''t know how It was my first try At milking a cow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lonely fisherman? A Master-Baiter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Auntie Em, hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. Dorothy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose? A: A collie-flower!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: I hope I didn''t see you copying the test from your friend. Student: I hope you didn''t either', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an elephant chasing a cat? Depends on what his name is.....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jr: This year I failed every class except biology. Mary: How did you do that? Jr: Easy, I didn''t take biology', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did one arithmetic book say to the other? A: I have a lot of problems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, I was walking along our road and saw a man who appeared to be very old and well-lived sitting in a rocking chair. Surely, I thought, this man had all the answers. So I asked, "How did you live to such a healthy old age?" He said, "I do lots of drugs, eat lots of sugars and fats, I smoke, and I never exercise." "Wow," I said, "how old are you again??" "I''m 22."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard some guys talking about you yesterday. One said that you weren''t fit to sleep with pigs, but I stuck up for you; I said you were!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know that the world is going crazy when: the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America''s Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn''t want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named ''Bush'', ''Dick'', and ''Colon''. -Chris Rock', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s green and turns red at the touch of a button? A frog in a liquidizer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a family of gnus, and one day, Mr Gnu went out to get some food but was ambushed and eaten by a pride of lions. Next salute, a poacher shoots Mrs Gnu, leaving poor Baby Gnu to starve to death. Well, that''s the end of the gnus; here''s the weather . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Money may not grow on trees, but it would seem as if morons like you certainly do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A ninety-year-old couple was going to bed, and the old lady was feeling romantic. She said to her husband, "I remember, when we were younger, how you used to hold my hand at night." Grumbling under his breath, her husband reached over and held her hand. Shortly after, she said, "I remember how, when we were younger, you kissed me every night before we went to sleep." Really getting ticked off, the husband gave her a quick peck on the cheek. Then she said, "I remember how, when we were younger, you used to bite my neck." Angrily, the man threw the covers off of himself and stormed out of the room Surprised, the woman called after him asking what he is doing. "Going to get my teeth!" he replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour petrol on him and set him on fire, and he''ll go "WOOF"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Mom''s so old that she was alive when the Raiders had both eyes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life is like a dick... when it gets hard fuck it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many of the trees and rainforests are being cut down. So in effort the B.H.O.A. made a slogan, Save a tree Burn a bush Bush as in former president', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, it takes 20 navy ships just to get her half way across the ocean, and they run out of gas. Then she farts and goes around the world 2 times.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In this age of political correctness we must reajust our terms. People are no longer concidered gay, here are two better options: Good: A wanabe transvestite Best: Heterosexually challenged.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop, and hangs it on her bathroom door. One evening, while getting undressed, she playfully says "Mirror, mirror, on my door, make my bustline forty four". Instantly, there is a brilliant flash of light, and her breasts grow to enormous proportions. Excitedly, she runs to tell her husband what happened, and in minutes they both return. This time the husband crosses his fingers and says "Mirror mirror on the door, make my penis touch the floor!". Again, there''s a bright flash... and then his legs fall off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so skinny, when it''s pouring outside, she can dodge the raindrops', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so stupid she went to McDonalds and thought she could buy the whole menu for a $', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so fat, when God said let there be light, he asked your mom to move over.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Walk to your neighbor''s house and ask in your best British accent, "May I borrow a cup of pants?" 2. Go over to a friend''s house, take off your shirt, put on one of theirs and leave. 3. When a telemarketer calls, say, "Welcome to Hell! Satan speaking, how may we reap your soul today?" 4. Randomly say quotes from the movie Anchorman out of context. 5. Wake up really early. Sneak into your neighbor''s house, get the newspaper, brew up some coffee, make breakfast, and wait for him to see you. Then scream and promptly exclaim, "What are you doing in my house?!?!?!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The old Lord of the Manor was finally on his death-bed, and had called his servants to his bed-side. To his butler, he said, "Jeeves, you have been with me now for nearly 40 years, and for your loyal service I shall leave you Ashley Hall, with its 74 rooms, and a 100% pension." "Thank you, your lordship," said Jeeves. Turning to the house-keeper, "Jurby, you have been in my employ for 25 years, and for your excellent running of the house, I leave you Grantley Hall with its 42 rooms, and a 75% pension." "Thank you, your lordship," said Jurby. Finally, he turned to the chauffeur, "Parker, you have been with me now for 6 months, and in that time you have crashed my 1912 Rolls Royce, blown up the engine in the Le Mans-winning 1928 Bentley, and got the maid pregnant. I''m leaving you bugger all." "Thank you, your lordship; and how many rooms does that have?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A British girl recently moved to the United States and their home was near the Colorado River in Texas. The English teacher asked the kids to write about their home and neighborhood. The British girl wrote "My home is near the Colourado River." as part of her work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Andy was a staunch Republican, while Mary was Democrat through and through. They met at a political rally, and spent many hours arguing back and forth, until eventually love blossomed, and they got married. On the wedding night, however, as many of their friends had prophesied, they argued. Turning their backs on each other, they went to sleep; but about 3 in the morning - "I''m sorry, Andy. There''s been a split in the Democrat Party, and if the Republican member stood now, he''d get in with no problem." "Too late, the Republican member stood as an Independent, and lost his deposit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly lady went to a butcher''s shop one day, and noticed that on the liver in the window were two white balls. Being of a curious nature, she asked what these white balls might be, to be told that they were golf balls, and that placing them on the liver kept them supple. She returns the following week, when there were four of these white balls lying on the liver. "So you''ve shot another golfer, then?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man from Rangoon Whose farts could be heard on the moon; When you''d least expect ''em They''d burst from his rectum With the force of a raging typhoon!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so ghetto, both she and her dog have weave.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('101 Hot ''n'' Spicy Meals by Tung Payne', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fortune teller escaped from prison and became a small medium at large.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft, and I''ll show you A-flat minor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever noticed people who cough/sneeze/do just about anything they can to spread their germs to everyone and everywhere? Well basically their theory is make germs like forwards. Try to get them around the world in 40 days or less. Lets try to get rid of these people rather then the avian virus before there is an epidemic. So to all those classmates who sit behind you and refuse to covertheir mouths-Good day to you all. In the words of Tiny Tim "and to all a good night."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is such a whore... She gets more ass than a toilet seat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is green and yellow and eats nuts? GONORRHEA', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, when she fell on the ground, I tried not to laugh, but the ground was cracking up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tommy the Hedgehog was one of a rare sub-division which suffered a small but significant genetic defect. This defect manifested itself in a malformed penis, which divided into four branches; though a little unusual, it was a good way to meet a lot of intrigued girl hedgehogs, so Tommy was a rather proud of this abnormality. One peculiarity of his family was the way that he slept; curled up in a ball, lying on his back, and it was while taking a nap one day that he felt a terrible pain in the genital region. He jumped up to see his penis disappear down the throat of a large cat. "What the HELL are you playing at?" shouted Tommy; "I''m awfully sorry," replied the cat, "it''s just that I''m a four-point tool eater jaguar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three friends decided to check out a room in a hotel, but before the man gave them their key he said, "In your room there is a window. If you jump out of it while wishing something outloud your wish will come true." The three friends raced to their room, the first guy jumped out and said, "I wish for a big pile of money!" and landed in one. The second guy wished for a group of cheerleaders that would love him. He jumped out and landed in their arms. The third guy got a running start, tripped over the window frame and said, "Crap!" Let''s just say he went back to wish for lots and lots of soap.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so hairy, she got afros around her nipples!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This issue has been on my mind a lot lately. The lives of the innocent destroyed for the belief that they are mistakes. Many say that they''re inadequate and that they deserve to be sent away. I''m sure they have feelings, too, though! Sometimes I can''t eat or sleep because I think about them so much. It''s such an injustice! They were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Given no notice, they are swept right out of this world with such speed and are never heard from ever again. So many questions cloud my thoughts. How do they feel? Are they frightened or angry? Are they cold, lost and hungry? But the one question that I cannot find the answer to is: What happens to those poor letters who get deleted?!?!?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never have lunch with a chess player - I did once; there was a checkered tablecloth, and it took him half an hour to pass me the salt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pub landlord was delighted with the little puppy that he''d acquired, and the little puppy was very pleased with his new home. He''d run around the place, just a bundle of energy - very inquisitive, examining this, looking into that, non-stop all day, until the inevitable happened and he caught his tail in a fast-closing door and lost it! Time passed, and as one human year equals seven dog years, eventually he went to dog-heaven, for an endless supply of dog biscuits, walks in paradise - well, you couldn''t call it a dog''s life! However, he felt incomplete, and one night around midnight, he went back in his ghostly form to ask to be made whole again. "Sorry," said the landlord, "you know very well I can''t retail spirits after hours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grey hair is hereditary - you get it from your kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your Momma is so poor, when i picked up a penny she said "You owe me my paycheck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old, when she was a kid the rainbows were black and white.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a sock and a camera? One takes five toes and one takes photos.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If this offends anyone, PM me. You know you''re a Mexican when... 1. Someone related to you has their name tattooed anywhere on their body. 2. Your family goes to the flea market in their Sunday''s best. 3. Your birthday doesn''t have cake, candy, and Coca-Cola but has fajitas, chicken, and tequila. 4. When you''ve seen your uncle wearing your "new" clothes. 5. Your favorite music is not rap, rock, pop, or oldies, but instead, Tejano.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife is so house-proud, we live next door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent survey, 4% of men preferred fat legs; 6% preferred skinny legs; while 90% preferred something in between.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('E.T phone home! That must be one hell of a phone bill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a mathematician is an extrovert? He looks at *your* shoes when he talks to you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look at those ears! You have so much wax, that if I stuck a wick in there you would sing "Happy Birthday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two prostitutes moved to a new town, and on their first Sunday, went to church. One of the girls was quite proud of her singing; the other felt she couldn''t carry a tune in a bucket, so was quiet. After one desultory hymn, the priest berated the congregation, "Quite clearly, there are some who are singing, and some who are not. Can we please have a more concerted effort for the other hymns?" One whisper to her friend, "My word, how did he know about us so quickly?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde went into a restaurant and decided she was going to order the free birthday dessert, even though it wasn''t her birthday. A month later on her real birthday she went back to the restaurant with her family, and they had the same waiter. She ordered the dessert again and the waiter recognized her. This was her excuse: "Oh that wasn''t me that was my twin sister." Let''s just say she wasn''t going back anytime soon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a one-eyed dinosaur? Dyouthinkhesaurus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A red-head heard there was a party being held, but when she arrived, they wouldn''t let her in - it was a fancy-dress party! Disappointed but determined, she left, only to return shortly requesting admission. She was wearing only a pair of red gloves and a pair of red shoes and when she was asked what her fancy dress was, she stood with hands raised and said, "I''m the five of hearts, of course!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('GOSSIP: something that no one claims to like but everyone enjoys. KISS: To a geographer: The shortest distance between two curves! To a physicist: The contradiction of mouth due to expansion of heart. To an accountant: A credit because it is profitable when returned. OBESITY: A surplus gone to waist. OLD AGE: When you wink at a woman and she says, "Anything wrong with your eye, Uncle?" RAINCOAT: Thunder wear! WRITER''S CRAMP: Authoritis! HEMOPHILLIA: A disease of blood with affinity (philia) to "he" (male) only.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy goes into a drug store and asks for deodorant. Assistant says, "Aerosol or ball-type?" to which he replies, "Neither, it''s for under my arms."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Toothbrush: "I have the dirtiest job in the world" Toilet Paper: "Yeah...right"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock Who''s there? Some. Some who? Some asshole telling you knock, knock jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long he could suck it, Said he with a grin, As he wiped off his chin, If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two elderly priests and a young novitiate were at the railway station to buy train tickets to Pittsburgh. The young lady selling tickets was very pretty, and was wearing a rather low-cut dress which showed her ample mammaries to great advantage. The novitiate approached the ticket booth and said, "Three tickets to Tittsville, please." "How dare you?" remonstrated the ticket seller. The young novitiate blushes and retires in confusion, so one of the priests says, "Allow me. Three pickets to Tittsburgh, and please may I have the change in nipples an dimes." He also retreats in embarrasment, so the eldest priest attempts to calm the now angry ticket seller. "Three tickets to Pittsburgh, please, and you should cover up more than you are, or Saint Finger is going to shake his peter at you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a girl from Darjeeling, Who could dance with exquisite feeling, There wasn''t a sound For miles around, Except fly buttons hitting the ceiling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John took Mary to the movies, and they both enjoyed the show very much. Afterwards, John asked Mary what she wanted to do; "I want to get weighed," she said. He took her to a drugstore, where the machine said she weighed 107 pounds, but for the rest of the night she pouted and sulked. When they finally got to her house, John tried to kiss her, but she said, "Go on home now, I''ve had a wowsy time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I lent a friend of mine $5000 for plastic surgery. I can''t get it back, because now I DON''T KNOW WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, they took her x-ray and a picture of a McDonald''s showed up on the screen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the last thing that goes through a fly''s mind when he hits your windshield? His asshole!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, the little boy from THE SIXTH SENSE walked up to her and said "Let me tell you my secret now...I see YOU...everywhere"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I were to be pun-ish-ed For every little pun I shed I''d hide me to a punny shed And there I''d hang my punnish head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(to be read aloud) ''Twas in a restaurant they met Romeo and Juliet But Romeo couldn''t pay the bill So Romee-owed what Julie ate ("ett").', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl goes to her doctor, because she''s found some unusual green marks on her thighs. After the doctor has examined the marks, she asks the girl some questions so that she can determine the cause. "Do you have a boyfriend?" "Yes." "Can you describe him?" "Ok; he''s tall, dark, and works at the fairground." "So he''s a traveller?" "Yes, he is; any problems?" "No, no. I do think his earrings may be made of brass, though."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Justin and Tarquin were having a wonderful time at the fairground, trying all the attractions, until they arrived at the carousel. Tarquin said, "Let''s go on this one, Justin." "I''m tired right now," said Justin, "you go ahead and I''ll see you later." So Tarquin goes on the carousel, but after a few minutes, the the carousel collapses in a heap. "Tarquin, Tarquin, are you all right?" calls Justin. "All right? Of course I''m not all right; seven times I went past you, and you didn''t wave once!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The masked and armed man entered the bank. "Nobody move, or you''re geography!" shouts the bandit. One of the tellers says, "Don''t you mean ''history''?" "Don''t change the subject!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do black people wear hats with such big bills? So birds don''t shit on their lips', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant woman was on a bus. As the bus was going along, the woman started to give birth. An off-duty doctor rushed to her side and started to help her. He shouted to the rest of the bus, "Can someone help me?" Then towards the back of the bus a blond got up and smashed the back window. The doctor turned to her and said, "What did you do that for?" The blond replied, "Well it said on the window, In emergency, break glass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family was eating out at a restaurant. The waiter who had been standing by them said in quite an upset manner "Well I guess I''m gonna go home, make myself a cold tuna sandwich, watch the news, and then cry myself to sleep again." The mother of the family looks at him in pity and says " would you like to join us?" The waiter shouts back, "Did you not just hear me?! I have an evening planned!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s gray and comes in packets? Instant elephant. What''s gray and comes in buckets? An elephant. What''s gray and has a trunk? A mouse going on holiday. How do elephants hide in cherry trees? They paint their toe-nails red. How do elephants get down from cherry trees? Sit on a leaf and wait for fall. How do elephants hide in custard? Paint the soles of their feet yellow and hide upside down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, an American and a Frenchman were discussing a good example of savoir-faire. "Ok," said the Englishman, "if you came home and found your wife in bed with another man and you didn''t kill him, that to me, is savoir-faire." "Not quite, fellas," said the American. "If you came home and found your wife in bed with another man and you said, ''Please carry on'', that''s savoir-faire." "Mais non," said the Frenchman. "If you came home and found your wife in bed with another man and you said, ''Please carry on'', and he could, that''s savoir-faire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present. "Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?" Five small voices answered in unison: "Okay, Dad, you get the toy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-- Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs. -- Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained. -- Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. -- Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk. -- Negl', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher. The note read: Bill Jones having gone to sea, his wife desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety. Failing to observe the punctuation, he startled his audience by announcing: Bill Jones, having gone to see his wife, desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat you were born in the middle of the ocean!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so big, the Apollo 13 crashed into her head, right before it landed on the moon! Maybe that explains why she''s so stupid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An off-duty police officer, familiar with radar guns, drove through a school zone within the legal speed limit when the flash of a camera went off, taking a picture of his license plate. The officer, thinking the radar was in error, drove by again; even more slowly. Another flash. He did it again for a third time, at an even slower speed. Same result. "This guy must have screwed up the settings," the off-duty officer thought. A few weeks later, when he received the violations in the mail, he discovered three traffic tickets: each for not wearing a seat belt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After trying a new shampoo for the first time, a guy fired off an enthusiastic letter of approval to the manufacturer. Several weeks later he came home from work to a large carton in the middle of the floor. Inside were free samples of the many products the company produced: soaps, detergents, tooth paste, and paper items. "Well, what do you think?" his wife asked smiling. "Next time," he replied. "I''m writing to General Motors!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bet it was really tough being an Apostle of Jesus. What if you wanted a day off? You ring up Jesus and say, "Jesus, I''m sick today, running a little fever and feeling congested so I won''t be able to make it to today''s sermon. What...? Say that again...? I''m cured?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a small town, farmers of the community had gotten together to discuss some important issues. About midway through the meeting, a wife of one of the farmers stood up and spoke her piece. When she was done, one of the old farmers stood up and said, "What does she know about anything? I would like to ask her if she knows how many toes a pig has?" Quick as a flash, the woman replied, "Take off your boots sir, and count them yourself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jt/xmktp?akhjgp/uqpuRujgrt/pvP/tq/tkHqtjhqtjb!)<(]{,twmjtwmjtwmkadnjgptkgptjafmjipV9mkBRiECl88888888888888888888888888888888888888887777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777I won at the slots! modge???? i m ?!?! bubbye *cheffy!=', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat, that she goes to the zoo to see the elephants and they feed her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma so fat that people call her fat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she has her own gravitational pull!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Money can''t buy everything... but then again, neither can no money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area. The judge asked him if he had anything to say in his defense. "They should not put up such misleading notices," said Joe. "It said, FINE FOR PARKING HERE."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('gun(which shoots bees)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our house, in the middle of my feet, Our house, which smells of cheesy feet, Our house, will always get defeat, Our house, will never eat those feet. That was a song I made up ha!!!!!! ha!!!!!! ha!!!!!! ha!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she saw a Snickers commercial on TV...it said "Hungry? Why wait?"...so she ate the TV.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('OK, said the psychiatrist, "let''s try some tests. I''ll draw something, and you say what it reminds you of." He draws a house, and the patient says, "Sex." He draws a square, and the patient says, "Sex." He draws a circle, and the patient says, "Sex." He draws a trangle, and the patient says, "Sex." He draws a diamond, and the patient says, "Sex." "I see; it seems to me," says the trick-cyclist,"you have a fixation with sex." "Me? Who''s drawing all these dirty pictures?" ----------------------------------------------------- A man is referred to a psychiatrist because he imagines himself to be a pet dog. "All right, lie on the couch," says the doctor. "Sorry, I''m not allowed on the furniture!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Legs is the word - spread the word.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Okay sooo.. I kinda stumbled across this "word" when I was actually at the sprint store with my x-boyfriend. He was talking about how he needed to get unlimited text messaging and I looked over with a very concerned look on my face and said, "Yardy Yar!" I believe everyone in the store was hysterical and looked at me as if I was some crazy redneck - it was hilarious. If you don''t get it, it is supposed to sound like - "You already are." It''s actually pretty dang funny if you say it out loud!! haha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she walked in front of the T.V and your dad missed the whole series of "Lost"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat you can roll over twice and still be on the bitch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the urging of his doctor, Bill moved to Texas. After settling in, he met a neighbor who was also an older man. "Say, is this really a healthy place?" "It sure is," the man replied. "When I first arrived here I couldn''t say one word. I had hardly any hair on my head. I didn''t have the strength to walk across a room and I had to be lifted out of bed." "That''s wonderful!" said Bill. "How long have you been here?" "I was born here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she jumped of the Golden Gate bridge in San Fransisco and baptised England.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the senior citizens'' monthly bus trip, and the new driver, a great deal younger than their usual driver, a sedate 50-something, was careering down winding roads at quite a pace. The volunteer who was accompanying them was a little flustered, and with an embarrassed laugh, said to the old lady across the aisle, "Some speed, eh, Mrs. Jones?" "I don''t know about the others," she replied, "but I certainly have!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhowkajdjfhemfkucwrhynktjhncskhxctmcqjkhrnwuemhvtwujhmdjkwvnhtfuckfuckfuckfucksfghehfjnhjzjyh,fmjnhvyjnhmynjhctjmnhcjygcnjrhtkfhgimkkjnhmkjnhgmnjhnjynb,j', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marigold, I''m sorry. I hacked into xizle''s account ''cause I''m a stupid mother fuckin'' piece of shit!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DELETE THIS NOW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz poo on marigold abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING= SOME PEOPLE MAY FIND THIS JOKE A BIT RACIST OR OFFENSIVE. I MEAN NO OFFENCE TO ANYBODY WHO READS THIS. Q: How do you start a rush hour in Bangladesh? A: Roll a penny down the street!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I AM NOT A RACIST PERSON, I JUST FIND THIS FUNNY. There was once a rich pakistani. His name was Azif. (As if)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two thieves? A pair of knickers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('i want to live in a big castle and to be a princess', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When does Saddam Hussein have his lunch? When Tariq Aziz. (When Tariq has his)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede? A: Bacon and legs', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a sheep with no eyes? A blind sheep (what else?)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mommma is so skinny when she went to the strip club they used her as the pole!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a good trick to try on people... Say to them: "I''m going to ask you two questions. one you have to answer yes, the other you have to answer no. 1st question: Are you stupid? <(you can put in anything you want here) 2nd question: Are you a liar?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Because I had forgotten the dates for a number of my friends'' and relatives'' birthdays and anniversaries, I decided to compile a list on the computer and have the dates highlighted on screen when the machine was turned on. I went to a number of computer stores to find a software program that would do the job but had no luck at the first few. I finally found one where the clerk seemed experienced. "Can you recommend something that will remind me of birthdays and anniversaries?" I asked. "Have you tried WIFE?" he replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Betcha I can give up gambling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I am sure most people have heard of or watched the popular show the Ozbournes and still more people have Heard Ozzy sing. My question is how can Ozzy sing if he can''t talk???', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man who died and went to heaven. There he saw a hot babe and a ladder. The babe said "you can have sex with me or climb the ladder to success." The man climbed the ladder. There he saw an even hotter babe who said the same thing. He climbed the ladder again. He saw yet another ladder and an even hotter babe, hotter than the previous ones. She said the same thing. So the man climbed the ladder one more time. This time he saw an extremely ugly man. The ugly man said "Hi, I''m Sess, suck me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sailor came home from his 5-year sea voyage, and had two bird-cages with him. He holds them up, and says to his wife, "Do you want the parrot, or do you want the cockatoo?" She replies, "I''ll have the parrot, I''ve had a cockatoo while you were away!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandma Jones from the valley had never experienced a sick day in her life, so she didn''t take it kindly when a bad case of the mulligrubs sent her to the hospital for observation. By the time a pair of husky interns got Grandma tucked into bed, she had managed to complain about everything: the temperature, the lights, the skimpy gown, the food and the mattress, especially, the mattress. Suddenly, Grandma spotted a small plastic item with a button, attached to a cord. "What''s that?" she demanded. "If you need anything in the middle of the night, Grandma," said one of the interns, "just press that button." "What does it do, ring a bell?" she asked. "No, it turns on a light in the hall for the nurse on duty," the intern replied. "A light in the hall?" responded Grandma. "Look, I''m the sick one around here. If the night nurse needs a light on in the hall, she can get up and switch it on herself."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A small boy was looking at the red ripe tomatoes growing in the farmer''s garden. "I''ll give you my two pennies for that tomato," said the boy pointing to a beautiful, large, ripe fruit hanging on the vine. "No," said the farmer, "I get a dime for a tomato like that one." The small boy pointed to a smaller green one, "Will you take two pennies for that one?" "Yes," replied the farmer, "I''ll give you that one for two cents." "OK," said the lad, sealing the deal by putting the coins in the farmer''s hand, "I''ll pick it up in about a week."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did God make man first? Because he didn''t want to be interrupted by woman!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ll get a world record for this. It''s fireproof. He''s probably just hibernating. I''m making a citizen''s arrest. So, you''re a cannibal. Are you sure the power is off? Yeah, I made the deciding vote on the jury, so what of it? I''ve seen this done on TV. These are the good kind of mushrooms. Let it down slowly. Rat poison only kills rats. Just take whatever you want, this is a ghost town. It''s strong enough for both of us. This doesn''t taste right. Nice doggie. I''ve done this before. Well, we''ve made it this far. That''s odd. Don''t be so superstitious.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two ships, one carrying lots of red paint, the other carrying lots of purple paint, crashed on a desert island. The drivers are now marooned.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends were out shooting birds. A bird flew from behind a tree and quick as a flash one man shot it. It uttered a squawk, folded its wings and fell to the ground. The other man turned to him and said: " You didn''t need to shoot that bird. The fall would have killed it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a leg and an egg? You can beat an egg up, but you can''t beat a leg up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story. This happened many years ago, and was told me by a man with spare time on his hands, who used to spectate in court to pass some of that spare time. Lawyer - "You say you saw the defendant''s car involved in a road accident at the junction of X and Y?" Policeman - "That is correct." L - "And where were you at this time?" P - "At the junction of X and Z." L - "So you were some 80 yards away when the incident occurred?" P - "Yes, I was." L, in incredulous accent - "So you were 80 yards away, but you say you knew this vehicle had been involved in an accident?" P - "Yes." L - "Then please tell the court how you knew this vehicle went through a red light?" P - "Because the light that I could see was green." L, triumphantly - "Ah, but how did you know that it had been in an accident?" P - "Because it went past on its roof."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you were born, God admitted that even he sometimes made mistakes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How does a blonde moon walk? A: She pulls down her panties and slides her ass along the floor!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, brunette, and redhead all go into a building to take an emergency course. After a few minutes of introductions, the instructor of the course starts to talk about fire. "Wherever you see a fire, you need to call 911, imediately." After an hour or so of the lecture, the brunette makes an excuse to get out of there, by saying she needs a drink. 2 minutes later she comes running back in, with fire fighters behind her, and she yells, "There''s a fire!" They all run out, and after a few minutes the fire fighters come back out, and say, "We can not find a fire." The blonde suddenly screams out "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT" she gestures towards the redhead, "THE FIRE IS ON HER HEAD."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her husband go to buy her new clothes. First, they decide she needs a new shirt, so they go through a few shirts but she rejects them all. Finally she points at one that she likes, but he thinks it is ugly, so he says no. They go through almost the whole store, and she says no to all of the shirts. Bored and annoyed, the husband finally goes up to the shirt she likes and generously "Fine, do you want this polo shirt?" The wife thinks for a few seconds and says "Oh, it''s a polo shirt? In that case no, I''m really not into sports."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What should you give a man who has everything? A woman to show him how to work it. What''s the quickest way to a man''s heart? Straight through the rib cage. Why can''t men get mad cow disease? Because they''re all pigs. What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner? A power failure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than taking a bite out of an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it is dry - moisten. If it is moist - dry. Congratulations, you are now a dermatologist. ==================================================== What''s the difference between a general practitioner and a specialist? One treats what you have, the other thinks you have what he treats.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. Indecision is the key to flexibility. Hang in there, retirement is only 30 years away! Aim low; reach your goals; avoid disappointment. Teamwork means never having to take the blame yourself. A person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat. If at first you don''t succeed, try management.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius asks: "If a train station is where the train stops, and a bus station is where the bus stops, what is a work station?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THIS IS A TRUE STORY!!! My cousin works as a technical support receptionist at a computer company. This is an actual conversation he had one day: "Hi, I''m having trouble with my computer. It''s not working!" "Well, I''ll do my best to help you." *gets technical information for computer from caller* "OK, can you press ''Control'', then hold down ''Alt'' and, then ''Delete''?" "Hey, it''s in French!" "What is?" "The keyboard?" "*sigh* Well, can you press..." "Oh, darn, I just noticed, the power''s off!" "Well, can you turn it on, please?" "How?" "Press the power button." "Where is it?" "It''s normally a big button on the actual computer, not the monitor." "Like the lizard?" "Pardon me?" "Oh, OK, I got it." "OK, now press ''Control'' and then ''I''..." " ''I'' as in Isabel or ''I'' as in Irene?" And so on and so on..... :) Customers can be so...difficult...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in Target the other day, shopping with a young lady friend. We were walking past the furniture section where there were several different models of bar stools on display. Next to them there was a sign that read: "All models in stock now!" So I paused next to the display and said, "Do you know what these are?" "What?" she asked. I said, "Stool samples."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was buying a horse and was given a few simple instructions. To make the horse walk, he would say "few." To make the horse run, he would say "many." To make the horse stop he would say "amen." On the man''s first ride all was going well. "few!" the man shouted and the horse began to walk. "many!" the man shouted and the horse began to run. But the man had forgotten the word to make the horse stop as it ran towards the edge of a cliff. The man shouted in terror "Lord! Please save me! Amen!" And of course the horse stopped right at the edge of the cliff-face. The man then mopped his brow and said "Phew! that was clo- AAAAARRRRGHHH!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Last time my friend went to the zoo, he got in trouble for feeding the monkeys... ...to the lions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man 1: "My budgie lays square eggs!" Man 2: "Really! That''s amazing! Can it talk as well?" Man 1: "Yes, but only one word." Man 2: "What''s that?" Man 1: "Ouch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look at the speed of that plane! said one hawk to another, as a jet fighter plane hurtled over their heads. "Hmph!" snorted the other, "You too would fly fast if your tail was on fire!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two neighbours were talking to each other. One said to the other "Have you told your son to stop imitating me?" The other one replied "Yes. Yesterday I went up to him and said ''Stop acting such a fool!''..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife: Will you love me when I''m old and ugly? Husband: Darling, of course I do...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking through the desert, when he found a woman buried up to her neck. The woman asks him to dig her out, and he says, "What''s in it for me?" She replies, "Sand."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so short, you can see her feet on her driving licence!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s lips so big, she can whisper in her own ear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Soon after our last child left home for college, my husband was resting next to me on the couch with his head in my lap. I carefully removed his glasses. "You know, honey," I said sweetly, "Without your glasses you look like the same handsome young man I married." "Honey," he replied with a grin, "Without my glasses, you still look pretty good, too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I say! Look here! said an angry member of the grouse-shooting party. "You nearly shot my wife!" "I''m terribly sorry," replied the offender, "shall I try again?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display. "I have good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work, and wondered if they would increase in value after your death. When I told him they would, he bought all 15 of your paintings." "That''s great news," the artist said. "What''s the bad news?" "He was your doctor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a bad lawyer and a good lawyer? A bad lawyer can have a case drag on for several years. A good lawyer can make it last even longer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young reporter was sent on his first assignment. He sent in the following report to the office - "Mrs. Smith was injured in a car accident today. She is recovering in County Hospital with cuts on her breasts." The editor scolded the new reporter, "This is a family paper. we don''t use words like ''breasts'' around here. Go back and write something more appropriate!" The young reporter thought for a few minutes, and finally sent in this report - "Mrs. Smith was injured in a car accident today. She is recovering in County Hospital with cuts on her ( . ) ( . )."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was travelling at 180 miles per hour on a motorway and was pulled over by the traffic police. The man asked: "Sorry officer, was I driving too fast?" The policeman replied, "No, you were flying too low..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sticks and stones won''t break my bones but yo momma will when she gets on top!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man 1: "Why have you painted your car red on one side and blue on the other?" Man 2: "So that if I bang into anyone, the witnesses will have a marvellous time in court contradicting each other!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man at the movies had left his seat to buy an ice-cream. On his return he said to an old lady sitting at the end of the row, "I''m sorry, but did I step on your toe a minute ago?" The woman angrily replied "Yes, you certainly did!" "Oh," said the man, "Then this is my row."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The woman in a theatre box-office was surprised one evening just before the show at the behavior of one man. He bought a ticket, went away, and then returned a few minutes later to buy another one. He went away again, returned and bought a third ticket. Then he went away yet again, returned and bought a fourth ticket! By now the show had started, so the woman in the box-office said "I hope you don''t mind me asking, but why do you keep coming back and buying more tickets?" "Every time I try to get in to the auditorium," he replied, "some jerk takes my ticket and tears it in half!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl 1: "This morning my dad gave me soap-flakes instead of corn flakes for breakfast!" Girl 2: "I bet you were angry with him!" Girl 1: "Angry?! I was foaming at the mouth!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom: "Why have you been sent home early, Jack?" Jack: "Because the boy next to me was smoking." Mom: "But if he was smoking, why were you sent home?" Jack: "Because I set him on fire!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "Simon! What does it mean if the barometer falls?" Simon: "Err.. The nail''s come out of the wall, miss?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Coming home from his Little League game, Billy swung open the front door very excited. Unable to attend the game, his father immediately wanted to know what happened. ''So, how did you do, son?'' he asked. ''You''ll never believe it!'' Billy said. ''I was responsible for the winning run!'' ''Really? How''d you do that?'' ''I dropped the ball.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking down a street when he sees a blonde couple who looked extremely happy. He goes up to them and asks: "Why are you guys so happy?" The couple says "We just finished a puzzle that took us 3 years!" "3 years!" the man said "It doesn''t take that long to do a puzzle." "Oh yes it does" said the couple "It said so right on the side of the box 2 to 3 years...!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have reached the Strategic Air Command Nuclear Missile Storage Facility. We are unable to come to the phone right now. At the tone, please leave your name, number, and target or list of targets, and we''ll launch as soon as we can. And have a nice day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In answer to the question "What''s wrong?" The wife says: The same old thing. The wife means: Nothing. The wife says: Nothing. The wife means: Everything. The wife says: Nothing, really. The wife means: It''s just that you''re an idiot. The wife says: I don''t want to talk about it. The wife means: I''m still building up steam.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cop pulled over two drunks, and asked to the first, "What''s your name and address?" "I''m Paddy O''Day, of no fixed address." The cop turned to the second drunk, and asked the same question. "I''m Seamus O''Toole, and I live in the flat above Paddy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people ask the secret of Anthony''s long marriage. They take time to go to a restaurant two times a week: a little candlelight dinner, soft music, and a slow walk home. The Mrs. goes Tuesdays; He goes Fridays.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The crowd had cornered a woman and was preparing to stone her. Jesus raised his hand and spake, "Let he among you who is without sin cast the first stone." From the back of the crowd a small woman picked up a huge rock and staggered toward the poor victim. Jesus pointed a finger at her and said, "Stop it MOM! I was just trying to make a point!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bought the wife a hamster fur coat for her birthday, she was delighted with it. We went to the fair; took me 4 hours to get her off the big wheel!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two eggs were in a pan of boiling water. One egg says, "Phew, it''s hot in here!" The other egg replies, "Wait till we get out of here, they smash your head in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a farmer who grew watermelons, and every week he would check on his crop, and would find that the local kids had got into his field and eaten as many watermelons as they could. This went on for some time, and eventually the man got fed up replacing the missing watermelons. After some thought, he came up with an idea. He made a sign and placed it in the field; the sign read, "Warning! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide!" He feels pleased with himself, thinking that will stop the theft of his crop. A couple of days later, he returns, and the watermelons are all there; but in the distance, he sees another sign. He walks over to the sign, and reads, "Now there are two!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pete''s at work when he realises he''s forgotten to ask his wife, Alison, where he should pick her up after work. He calls home, and after several seconds, Ali answers the phone. Pete asks his question, and Ali shouts, "You got me out of the bath to ask me that? I dashed to the phone; I haven''t even got a towel over me, I''m dripping water in the hall! Pick me up in the square at 5.30!" As soon as Ali tells him she''s naked and wet in the hall, an evil thought occurs to him. "I''m terribly sorry to have got you out of the bath; ok, see you at 5.30 then." As he hangs up, he calls to his mate, Mark, and outlines his plan, and starts to dial his home number, then gives Mark the phone. When Ali answers the phone, Mark says, "Hi, Ali, is Pete ho... Oh, look at you! and all wet, too!" "Ahhhh...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack hadn''t been to a school reunion in decades. When he walked in, Jack thought he recognised a woman over in the corner, so he approached her and extended his hand in greeting. "You look like Helen Brown," he remarked. "Well", replied the angry woman, "you don''t look so great in blue either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a couple of rabbits found themselves being chased by a pack of wolves. They dashed into a thicket, and stood there panting. "So," gasped one to the other, "do you think we should keep running, or stay here until we outnumber them?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winston Churchill (whose mother was American) was Prime Minister of Britain during World War II. These are some insults he was involved in - Lady Astor "Winston, if you were my husband, I would put poison in your coffee." Winston Churchill "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it!" Bessie Braddock "Winston, you''re drunk!" Winston "Bessie, you are ugly, but tomorrow morning, I shall be sober!" Bernard Shaw sent Churchill two tickets to a first night, with a note saying "Bring a friend if you have one." Churchill replied, saying that he could not attend the first night as he was busy, and asked for tickets for the second night "If you have one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a men''s outfitters and grumpily asks to see the cheapest suit in the shop. The horrified snooty sales assistant immediately fetched a full length mirror and placed it in front of him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Special bonus, two for the price of one! The party was in full swing, the drink going down several well-lubricated throats. One of the guests was a Scot, wearing the traditional kilt, and a couple of the more adventurous girls were teasing him, asking him if anything was worn under his kilt. He replied, "No, everything is in perfect working order," and with that, he lifted his kilt to give them a quick flash. "Oh, it''s gruesome," said one of the girls. "Have another look," he says, "it''s grew some more!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes went out into the woods on a hunting trip. They are out there for several hours, and discover that they are lost! One says, "I heard that if you''re lost in the woods, you fire three shots in the air, and wait for someone to come and rescue you." "Ok," says her pal, "let''s do it." So they did, and waited to be rescued, but no-one came to their aid, so after an hour, they fired three more shots in the air, and waited again. It''s nearly dark by now, and one says to the other, "I hope someone comes soon, we''re down to our last three arrows."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two cows eating grass, On a warm, sunny hillock. By this time tomorrow, That grass will be millock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Albert Einstein was getting bored with making the same speech over and over again at different meetings, so one night, after a long day, his chauffeur jokingly said, "I''ve heard your speech so many times, I know it word for word! Why don''t you take the night off and let me deliver the talk this evening?" Einstein agreed. When they arrived at the venue, Einstein put on the chauffeur''s uniform and hat, and sat at the back of the hall while the chauffeur took his place on the podium, effortlessly delivering the speech, then inviting the audience to ask questions. He convincingly answered the first few, but then one pompous man stood up and asked a very difficult question on his theories of relativity. The chauffeur was flummoxed, but calmly said, "Why, that question is so very easy, I will let my chauffeur answer it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blond: Daddy! I know my alphabet! Dad: That took you 5 yaars! Blond: I know, but now I know my ABD''s!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde had twin girls - she called them Kate and Duplicate. Then she had twin boys - she called them Pete and Repeat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(9i)]-[cos(xy)/1096x]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t lobsters share? They''re shellfish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good insult: Your mom goes to college! Good comeback: How do you know? Stalker!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so short when she falls of the curb it sounds like aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, she thought innuendo was an Italian suppository.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My granddad was a very unlucky man. He made a soft drink, and called it 1-up, but it didn''t sell. He made another, called it 2-up, which also didn''t sell. He tried yet another, called it 3-up. He got to 6-up, and quit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that every time we blow our noses, we look inside the tissue afterwards? Are we expecting something other than boogers? Or are we checking to make sure they have not run off?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok. I honestly saw this on a billboard: Illiterate? Call this number to learn how to read.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy turns up at school very late one morning, and the teacher asks the reason why he''s late. "Sorry, Miss, my dad got burned." "I''m sorry to hear that; I hope it''s not serious," she replies. "Oh, they don''t piss about at the crematorium, Miss!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into the doctor''s surgery and said, "Doctor, every time I break wind it sounds like a motor bike." "That''s very interesting; is there anything else bothering you?" asked the doctor. "I also have a large boil on my backside," said the man. "Right," said the doctor, "I will lance your boil and your problem will disappear." "How''s that?" asked the man. "Because abscess makes the fart go Honda."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to a fancy dress party, dressed from head to toe in green, carrying a woman on his back. The host asks, "What have you come as?" He replies, "I''m a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle!" The host says, "Why have you a woman on your back?" "Oh, that''s Michelle," he replies. (My shell)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kangaroos were living in a zoo pen with a 20-foot high fence. One morning, both kangaroos were found wandering around the zoo, and were quickly put back in their pen, and the fence was put up to 30 feet. Next morning, they were found outside again, so the fence was made 40 feet high. The fence got up to 60 feet, and still the kangaroos were outside in the morning. One kangaroo says to the other, "How high will they make this fence, do you think?" "Don''t know," says the second. "Depends when they discover they''re not locking the gate." An elephant walks into a pub and orders a drink. He''s sipping his beer when a man starts playing the piano. The elephant looks over, and bursts into tears. "Why are you crying?" asks the barman. "Does the tune have some special significance for you?" "No," wails the elephant, "it''s just that I recognize the keys!" (Ivory!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mama is so old, her breast-milk is powder!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she blocks the sun when she''s out walking!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You call me ugly? Where is your mirror, boy?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never buy a toothbrush at a yard sale. Never buy a parachute that was used once and never opened before. Never sell computers for free at your garage sale. Trust me, there are many more ways to demolish your house. Never put bathroom humor up on the internet. Never watch American Idol auditions with Coke in your mouth. Never watch American Idol auditions without a couple of aspirins. And never, ever catch your grandparents taking a shower. All of these words of advice were found out by first-hand experience.If you want to meet the guy brave enough to try all of these "stunts" out, go to the Almont Graveyard in Stamfort, Michigan and visit the grave entitled:"Dave ''Daredevil'' Deatson". Or visit his grandparents in jail on Alcatraz Prison, California.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so poor her front door and back door are in the same room. Yo Momma so poor she kicked a can across the street and a man asked "what are you doing?" and she said "I''m moving."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman walked into a bar, and asked the barman for a double entendre, so he gave her one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, please, I have a problem pronouncing Ts, Fs and Hs! "Well then, you can''t say fairer than that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A women said to her boyfriend "Oh, honey... are we doing anything this weekend?" Her boyfriend on the other side of the room said "Yeah, of course" The woman said "Oh, honey. That''s great! What are we doing?" "Sunday... it''s just you, me, the T.V., and that big comfy couch!" he said. "Oh, honey... does this mean what I think it means!?" she said. She jumped up excitedly. "Oh, honey... you want to watch the Super Bowl too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. He says, "My dog''s cross-eyed, can you do something for him?" "Let''s have a look at him," says the vet, as he picks up the dog, examines his eyes, and checks his teeth. "I''m going to have to put him down," he finally says. "What?" says the man, "just because he''s cross-eyed?" "No," replies the vet, "because he''s really heavy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The class homework was to write about something unusual that had happened in the previous month. Little Johnny stood up to read his: "Daddy fell in the well last week," he began. "Good heavens," shrieked Mrs. Johnson, the teacher. "Is he all right now?" "He must be," said Timmy. "He stopped yelling for help yesterday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and notices that there is a game of poker taking place at a table in the corner of the room. To his amazement, one of the players is a German Shepherd, studying his hand intently. He asks the barman, "Is that dog actually playing poker?" "He certainly is, sir," replies the barman. "I am amazed," said the man. "Oh, it''s quite true, every night, the same group comes in here and they all play poker." "Does the dog win much?" asks the man. "No, he''s terrible, every time he gets a good hand, his tail starts to wag!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call an Alabama farmer with two black sheep under each arm? A: A pimp', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went out to buy a new television, and wanted to buy a locally-made set. The salesman showed me a set I quite liked, and he assured me it was made locally, but I saw through that - clearly printed on the box was "Built in Antenna."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your brain was dynamite, you wouldn''t have enough to blow your hat off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every village has its idiot. Somewhere in Texas, a village is missing theirs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A paper bag goes to his doctor, who says; "Your test results are back, and I''m afraid I have bad news. You have AIDS. "That''s impossible," cried the paper bag, "I''ve not had any form of sexual contact, nor am I a drug user!" "In that case," said the doctor, "your father must have been a carrier."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father and son went fishing one summer day. While they were out in the boat, the boy became curious about the world around him. He asked his father, "Dad, how does this boat float?" "Don''t rightly know, son." "Dad, how do fish breath underwater?" "Don''t rightly know, son." "Dad, why is the sky blue?" "Don''t rightly know, son." Eventually, after the boy asked his father several more questions, "Dad, do you mind me asking all these questions?" "Of course not, son. If you don''t ask questions, you never learn anything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sally "Mummy, why can''t I go swimming in the sea?" Mum "Because there are sharks in the sea." Sally "But mummy, daddy is swimming in the sea." Mum "That''s different, he''s insured."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you let your thirteen-year-old daughter smoke at the table in front of HER two kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three women that had just escaped from jail, one was a brunette, one was a red-head, and one was a blonde. They were running through the woods and the police and their dogs were chasing after them. The women ran into three empty potato sacks. They decided to hide. A policeman found the sacks and decided to give the first one a kick. It meowed. "Aww, it''s a sack full of kittens," he said. He kicked the second bag and it barked. "Aww, it''s a sack full of puppies," he said. He kicked the third one and it didn''t do anything. He kicked it again and it didn''t do anything. He was about to kick it again when the blonde popped out of it and said, "I can''t act like potatoes if you keep kicking me, duh!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This joke may seem racist to some. I just wanted to warn you of this before you read it. Sally - Where does a baby go after he or she has passed away? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - To heaven. What does the baby get after he or she arrives in heaven? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - Wings. What is the baby called? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - An Angel. Where does a black baby go after he or she has passed away? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - To heaven. What does the baby get after he or she arrives in heaven? Joe - I don''t know. Sally - Wings. What is the baby called? Joe - A bat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it''s too far to walk. What do you call a bright, sunny day that comes after two cold, cloudy days? Monday. A snake slithers into a bar. The barman says, "I can''t serve you, you obviously can''t hold your drink." Which side of a chicken has the most feathers? The outside. Two parrots on a perch. One says, "Do you smell fish?" An eel slithers into a bar. The barman says, "I can''t serve you, you''re legless."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t dogs allowed in the White House? They might pee on the Bush!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('this site is awesome! look 4 the difference between the pics! http://members.home.nl/saen/Special/Zoeken.swf', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Who who. Who who who? Is there an owl in here?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Amos. Amos who? Amosquito bit me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Moo, moo, who. Moo, moo, who, who? Well, make up your mind, are you a cow or an owl?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Toulose. Toulose who? I don''t want to lose to anybody!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock. Who''s there? Are you, Are you who? Are you going to let me in or not?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Yudare. Yudare who? You dare to disturb me,while I am sleeping?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid, she got lost in a parking lot!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was assigned a paper on childbirth and asked his parents, "How was I born?" "Well honey..." said the slightly prudish parent, "the stork brought you to us." "Oh," said the boy. "Well, how did you and daddy get born?" he asked. "Oh, the stork brought us too." "Well how were grandpa and grandma born?" he persisted. "Well darling, the stork brought them too!" said the parent, by now starting to squirm a little in the Lazy Boy recliner. Several days later, the boy handed in his paper to the teacher who read with confusion the opening sentence: "This report has been very difficult to write due to the fact that there hasn''t been a natural childbirth in my family for three generations."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A calendar something that goes in one year and out the other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ethel and Bunty were getting just a little bored in the senior citizens'' home, when Bunty had an idea. "I bet you $100 that you won''t streak round the garden, Ethel." "You have got a bet," replies Ethel, so she disrobes and sets off round the garden. Tom and Bob were enjoying a relaxing time in the garden when Ethel went past. Bob says, "Wasn''t that Ethel that went by?" Tom replies, "Yes, I do believe it was." "What was she wearing then?" "I don''t know," said Tom, "but it surely needed ironing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a dentist''s and says, "Can you help me? I think I''m a moth." The dentist says, "You need a psychiatrist, mate." The man says, "Yes, I know." The dentist replies, "Well, why have you come in here?" "Your light was on!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bought a book called "How to Hug," and when I got it home, found it was volume 7 of an encyclopedia. I phoned the gym, and asked if they could teach me to do the splits. The girl asked if I was flexible, and I said I couldn''t do Tuesdays.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman in a cafe had ordered turtle soup, but changed her mind and asked for pea soup instead. She heard the waiter call, "Hold the turtle, make it pea!" At the next table, a man ordered the fish, but when the waiter brought it, he was holding the fish on the plate. When asked why he was holding it on the plate, he said he didn''t want it to fall on the floor again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a part in the local repertory company''s Shakespeare week, and was allocated the dressing room that was next to the large room shared by three of the actresses. One day, a friend of mine was visiting me when he drew my attention to the fact that there was a small hole in the dividing wall. "You can see right through into next door!" he exclaimed. "Ah, let ''em look," I said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. On a mall child''s cart bag Do not put child in bag (Who does?) 2. On food court restaurant counters Warning: Touching hot surfaces may burn you (Wanna try?) 3a. Bush on war in Iraq "We''re not going to have any casualties." (Where are we now, huh?) 3b. Bush''s description of the White House "It is white." (WOW! Who knew???) 3c. Our future "The future will look better tommorow." (That settles it, we''re all gonna die.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A child custody case was held in court. The judge felt that the mother and father were both fit to be parents and therefore couldn''t decide who he should grant full custody to. So he asks the little boy, "Would you like to live with your mother?" "No," said the boy. "Why not?" said the judge. "Because she beats me." The judge says, "Okay, then you''ll go live with your father." "Oh, no," cried the boy, "he beats me too." Dumbfounded, the judge asks "Okay, who do you want to live with?" "I want to live with the New York Yankees." "Why?" asks the judge. "They don''t beat anybody."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a major difference between the way a dog thinks and the way a cat thinks. A dog says, "You feed me, shelter me, pamper me, and love me. You must be God." A cat says, "You feed me, shelter me, pamper me, and love me. I must be God."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have to see this joke to believe it. - Editor''s Note: Link Deleted -', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a cheetah with a hamburger? Fast food!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don''t work. Why is a river rich? Because it has two banks. What is a foreign ant called? Import-ant. What do ants take when they are ill? Anti-biotics.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the fastest way to double your money? By folding it in half', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one glass say to another glass? Lets have a break. What did one ghost say to another ghost? Do you believe in people? What did one chair say to another chair? Here comes another bum.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the similarity between Michael Jackson and a Playstation 2? They both are made of plastic, and they both get turned on by kids.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''Doctor,doctor.I think that I''m a bridge.'' ''What on earth''s come over you?'' ''Well a car,a bike.....''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One afternoon, a woman was in her back yard hanging laundry when a tired-looking dog wandered into the yard. The woman could tell from the dog''s collar and well-fed belly that he had a home. But when she walked into the house, the dog followed her, sauntered down the hall and fell asleep in a corner. An hour later, he went to the door, and the woman let him out. The next day the dog was back. He resumed his position in the hallway and slept for an hour. This continued for several weeks. Curious, the woman finally pinned a note to his collar, it read: ''Every afternoon, your dog comes to my house for a nap.'' The next day he arrived with a different note pinned to his collar: "We have six children. He''s trying to catch up on his sleep."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to do some errands, so the proud father stayed home to watch his wonderful new son. Soon after the mother left, the baby started to cry. The father did everything he could think of, but the baby just wouldn''t stop crying. Finally, the dad got so worried he decided to take the infant to the doctor. After the doctor listened to all the father had done to get the baby to stop crying, the doctor began to examine the baby''s ears, chest and then down to the diaper area. When he opened the diaper, he found was indeed full. "Here''s the problem," the doctor explained. "He just needs to be changed." The perplexed father remarked, "But the diaper package specifically says it''s good for up to 10 pounds!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A merger has been announced between the California Highway Patrol (CHiPs) and the California Fish and Game Department. It will be called Fish and Chips.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried to walk into Target one day... I missed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam didn''t want to go on the blind date that Tom had arranged for him. "What if she''s really ugly and I hate her?" he complained. "Then just clutch your chest and fake a heart attack," Tom replied. Sam thought this was a good idea, so he agreed to go through with it. He went to the address Tom had given him, and a beautiful woman answered the door. "Hi, I''m your blind date!" Sam said. The woman clutched her chest and fell to the ground.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Justin: If you give me a quarter, I''ll give you everything in my lunch box. Zach: That depends... what''s in your lunchbox? Justin: Nothing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She Was So Blonde She told someone to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and "Don''t Walk".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the hot dog say after winning a race? I''m a WIENER!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a teacher and a train? A teacher says "spit your gum out" and a train says "choo choo!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius say: Sperm sample from Nobel Prize winner is stroke of genius.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius Say: Crowd in elevator smell different to midget.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius say: Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways, going to Bangkok', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She used to have a broad mind and a narrow waist; now it''s the other way round. It was a very emotional wedding; even the cake was in tiers. Psychic wanted you know why, and where to apply. I don''t think they really wanted me in the marching band they gave me a piano. Then, when we played hide and seek, no-one came to look for me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking around in the movies with my friends and we saw this one teenager. His pants were falling down, so I said to my friends, "God, these kids nowadays! I thought a rapper died and the kid decided to put his pants half-staff!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it. Once he was in the doctor''s office, the man followed instructions, undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he looked up the man''s ass was that eye staring right back at him. "You know," said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, impressed by a meat entree his wife had prepared, the husband asked, "What did you marinate this in?" The wife dropped her fork and went into a long explanation about how much she loved him and how life wouldn''t be the same without him. She must have seen the confused look on her husband''s face, because she inquired, "What did you ask me?" When he told her what he''d asked, the wife laughed and said, "I thought you asked me if I would marry you again!" Later, as she was cleaning up the kitchen, the husband called out, "Hey, Hon, WOULD you marry me again?" Without hesitation she replied, "Vinegar and barbecue sauce."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The veterinarian told the blonde that her dog needed some exercise. "You need to make sure this dog runs around," the doctor said. "Try playing a game of fetch with him." "I can''t play fetch with my dog," the blonde said. "Why not?" the doctor asked. "Because," she replied, "he can''t throw."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Holiday Banana Bread: Ingredients: 2 laughing eyes, 2 loving arms, 2 well shaped legs, 2 firm milk containers, 1 fur-lined mixing bowl, 1 large banana Instructions: 1 - look into laughing eyes and hold loving arms. 2 - Spread well shaped legs slowly. 3 - Squeeze & massage milk containers until the fur-lined mixing bowl is well greased - check with middle finger. 4 - Add banana, work up and down until well creamed. 5 - Lower nuts and sigh with relief. When banana is soft, bread is done! 6 - Be sure to wash mixing utensils, but "do not lick the bowl." NOTE: If bread rises, leave town.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was filling out an application form. She quickly filled in the columns for Name; Age; Address et c. When she came to the column Salary Expected, she put "Yes." At an air show, the blonde turned to her partner and said, "I wouldn''t like to be up there in one of those!" Her partner replied, "I wouldn''t like to be up there without one." A blond farmer had a donkey had refused to go under a bridge, and when she measured the donkey and the bridge, found that the donkey was 6 inches too tall to go under. She got a hammer and chisel, and was cutting two grooves for the donkey''s ears when a passer-by suggested she dig a groove in the ground for the donkey''s feet. "Don''t be so daft," she said, "it''s his ears that''s too long, not his legs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Godzilla, King Kong, and a smart blonde are all on the Empire State Building. Who jumps first? None. Because none of them exist!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38 revolver. He placed it on top of the instrument panel, and then asked the navigator, "Do you know what I use this for?" The navigator replied timidly, "No, what''s it for?" The pilot responded, "I use this on navigators who get me lost!" The navigator proceeded to pull out a .45 and place it on his chart table. The pilot asked, "What''s that for?" "To be honest sir," the navigator replied, "I''ll know we''re lost before you will."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a college professor who didn''t buy into the whole "there''s no such thing as a stupid question" philosophy. Every year when he had a new class he instructed the students to ask him as many stupid questions as they could think of on the first day. That way, he figured, there''d be a minimized amount of stupidity for the duration of the term. The professor thought he''d heard every stupid question there was and didn''t laugh no matter what his students asked him, not even a smirk. Then, finally, a student asked something that he''d never heard before. The question made him laugh so hard he couldn''t stand up. A lanky, tomboyish girl raised her hand with a wry smile on her face, stood up and asked, "What is a question?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two criminals are talking in a jail cell. "What are you in for?" "Something I did NOT do!" "Sooo... you''re innocent? What did you not do?" "I DIDN''T run fast enough!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blond adventurers were on holiday, and went to see Niagara Falls. After a few drinks one night, one bet the other $500 he couldn''t carry him across the falls on a tightrope. After a very scary trip, his friend managed to stagger safely across, and the wager was duly paid. "That was close," said the loser. "When you wobbled, halfway across, I was sure I''d won."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this lady who was in the shower and her little boy walked in on her taking a shower & he saw her pubic hairs and says: "Mommy what''s that?" as he pointed down to her. "Well, that''s Mommy''s washcloth." The next day he walked in on her again, and asked her again. She says it was her washcloth. Well, this time when he walked out she shaved it off because she got tired of him asking. So the next day when he walked in on her, he asks: "Mommy what happened to your washcloth?" "Uh, Mommy lost it." So the little boy walked out. The next day he walked in on his mom and says: "Hey Mommy, the maid found your washcloth. She is washing Daddy''s face with it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the whale say to the dolphin when he pushed him? I didn''t do it on porpoise!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men were at a business convention where they were discussing cars. One man said, "I am an astronaut, so I drive a Saturn." Another man says, "I am a pimp, so I drive a cheap Escort." The last man speaks up saying, "Well, I beat both of you - I am a proctologist, so I drive a brown Probe!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid, when they said "Drinks are on the house!" She went and got a ladder.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that small things orbit her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three blondes stranded on an island. They were left with one bottle of water, so the decided to have thirds of the bottle. The next day, the bottle is lying empty next to one blonde, and the other two blondes say, "Why''d you drink all the water?" and the blonde says, "But my third was at the bottom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She make Olympic sumo wrestlers look anorexic.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid, she watches television on an Etch-A-Sketch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A biologist, a physicist and a mathematician were sitting in a street caf watching the crowd. Across the street, they saw a man and a woman entering a building. Ten minutes later, they reappeared, with a third person. "They have multiplied," said the biologist. "Oh no, it''s an error in measurement," the physicist replied. "If exactly one person enters the building now, it will be empty again," was the mathematician''s conclusion.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you say to a redneck with a beautiful woman on his arm? "Hey, nice tattoo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently, Germans conducted some scientific exploration involving their best men. Core drilling samples were taken to a depth of 50 metres, and during these examinations, small pieces of copper were discovered. After running many arduous tests on these samples, the German government announced that 25,000 years ago, ancient Germans had a nationwide telephone network. The British government was unimpressed, and conducted their own survey. From samples drilled to a depth of 100 meters, they found small pieces of glass, and announced that 35,000 years ago, the ancient Britons had a nationwide optical-fibre network. The Irish government felt they had to conduct their own survey, their scientists bored to a depth of 200 meters, but found absolutely nothing. They concluded that, 55,000 years ago, the ancient Irish already had a thriving cell phone network in place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There I was, in my car, driving down the road, when my boss rang up and said, "We''re making you Chief Area Salesman," and I swerved. Ten minutes later, he called again, "You''re now Deputy Area Manager," and I swerved again. Another twenty minutes go by, and another phone call, "You''re now Vice Chairman," and I swerved right off the road into a ditch. When the police asked what had happened, I said, "I just careered off the road."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man accused of robbing a bank was tried for the final time and was found guilty. Just before he was taken away, the man looked the judge in the eye and said, "Would it be okay if I called you a son of a bitch?" The judge''s face went red and he roared, "It most certainly would not! I''d add another two years onto your sentence!" The defendant nodded and then asked, "Would it be okay if I THOUGHT you were a son of a bitch?" The judge was becoming very annoyed but replied, "Yes, I suppose that would be okay. I obviously have no control over your thoughts." The defendant smiled and said, "Well, in that case, judge, I think you are a son of a bitch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Report of a duel between Alexander Shott and John Nott, in June 1849. Nott was shot and Shott was not. In this case, it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some said that Nott was not shot, but Shott says that he shot Nott. It may be that the shot Shott shot, shot Nott, or it may be possible that the shot Shott shot, shot Shott himself. We think, however, that the shot Shott shot, shot not Shott, but Nott.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A six-year-old boy came home from playing at his friend''s house and told his mother that he had broken a lamp when he threw a football. "It''s all right, mum," he said, brightly; "you don''t have to buy them another! Charlie''s mum said it was irreplaceable!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The gangster''s last words "Who put that violin in my violin case?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I gave up Thai boxing because I felt the Thais were getting fed up being put in boxes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you give the person who has everything? A box to keep it all in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Wake up and stumble in the room 40 minutes late. 2. Blame all of the problems in America on 9/11 and Iraq. 3. Pronounce "nuclear" right. 4. Publish my dog''s sequel. 5. Show off my awesome golf shot. Hey, I counted to five!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so cross-eyed, when I was banging her she thought she was getting a threesome!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between MJ and a grocery bag? One is white, made of plastic, dangerous for children to play with, and the other one holds groceries! Why does MJ like Wal-Mart? Because they have boys'' pants half off! What time is bedtime in Neverland? When the big hand touches the little hand! And now, for the grand finale: What is brown and in little boys'' pants? MJ''s hand!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('99.9% of all lawyers make the other ones look bad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of white people running down a hill? Avalanche! What do you call a group of black people running down a hill? Mudslide! What do you call a group of Latinos running down a hiil? JAILBREAK! How do you find the country of Mexico? Roll a quarter down a hill. How do you find the richest Mexican? Find the one who got the quarter!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, I saw my friend with a big puffy red nose. I asked her what happened and she said, "I stopped to smell a brose," then I said, "wait, there''s no b in rose!" She said, "Well, there was in that one!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know that 61.8 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many old geezers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Back in my day, we didn''t have lightbulbs. We put candles in tin cans and hung them from the ceiling with thread. And we had to walk uphill both ways to school in a blizzard with nothing but a potato to keep us warm. And... zzzzzz......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Hey, that''s not funny! We''re suing! Q: How many Japanese does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Who needs lightbulbs with our technology? Q: How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: We can''t afford lightbulbs. The only thing I can afford is this old gym sock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Oh, that looked like it hurt! It must have knocked his nose off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abortion - Near Life Experience Bald - Follically liberated Blind - Photonically non-receptive Bum - Displaced homeowner Cannibalism - Intra-Species dining Censorship - Selective speech Cheating (Marriage) - Post-Marital Affairs Cheating (School) - Academic Dishonesty Clumsy - Uniquely coordinated Corpse - Permanently static post-human mass Cowboys - Bovine control officers Crime Rate - Street activity index Dead - Living impaired Deaf - Visually oriented Delicatessen - Corpse Farm Dish Washer - Utensil Sanitizer Fat - Person of substance Gas Station Attendant - Petroleum Transfer Technician Hunter - Meat Mercenary Idiot - Factually Unencumbered Insane Person - Selectively Perceptive Midget - Vertically Challenged', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Americans and the Russians had a car race, in which the car from America won. However, the report in the newspapers of Russia, read as follows "In a recent motor race, the Russian car finished in second place, while the American car finished next to last." (There were only two cars involved!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jerry Jones applied to a debt-collecting agency for a job, even though he had no experience. He was very intense, so the manager gave him a tough account with the promise that if he collected, he''d get the job. Two hours later, Jerry returned with the full amount! "Amazing!" said the manager. "How on earth did you manage that?" "Easy," replied Jerry, "I told him that if he didn''t pay up, I''d tell all his other creditors he''d paid us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On June 10th, 2006, San Fransisco, California held the largest gay, nude bike ride in the United States. I''m never buying a used bike ever again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dad has always told me that putting in a little effort and dedication on the job never hurt anyone. Then again, he never heard of worker''s comp.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Miss Blue(Teacher):"2 x 2 = 4, 4 x 4 = 16, and now, Brian, what is 16 x 16?" Brian(Pupil): "You cheated, Miss Blue. You always take the easy one and give us the hardest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: "My hair keeps falling out. What can you give me to keep it in?" Doctor: "A shoebox!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make a reindeer fast? Don''t feed it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? "It''s Christmas, Eve!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ll be sober tomorrow, but you''ll be ugly for the rest of your life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s mother took him to a supermarket to buy some food. "Anything you break comes out of your allowance money!" shouted Johnny''s mother. Johnny turned around and said "But you don''t give me any allowance money!" "Yes, and now you know why."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there was a blonde, brunette, and a red-head. (How often do ya hear that? A lot!) The brunette said, "Wanna go out for a bite?" "Sure," said the blonde. A guy walked down the street and the blonde said, "I call him!" The blonde went and got him to bite her. "Why did ya do that," asked the brunette? "I got a BITE."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When all the national leaders met with Bush... Germans make your candy, said Germany''s leader, We abuse it, said Bush. Holland makes your remotes, said Holland''s leader We''d die without those, said Bush. Italy and Mexico bring in great food, said Mexico & Italy, We stuff ourselves with it, said Bush. Japan makes your video games, said Japan''s leader; Our kids and dads love it, said Bush. China makes all the rest, said China''s leader, Bush said, AMEN. WHAT DO YOU MAKE? said all but Bush, Bush took them to a farm, He took them to a sleping bull. The bull had a turd next to it. It said "Made in America", Bush told them America makes bull****', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen." 9. "This is just a 15 minute power nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to." 8. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out. You probably got here just in time!" 7. "I wasn''t sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm." 6. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance." 5. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?" 4. "Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem." 3. "The coffee machine is broken." 2. "Someone must''ve put decaf in the wrong pot." 1. "...in Jesus'' name. Amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hi, this is Johan advising you that you spend WAY too much time on the phone. GO OUTSIDE... See the world, LIVE a little... Have fun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so greasy Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid! Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco! Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so skinny Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio Yo mama so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex. Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and disappeared.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so lazy, she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs. Yo momma so lazy, she''s got a remote control just to operate her remote! Yo momma so lazy, she came in last place in a recent snail marathon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s head so small, she use a tea-bag as a pillow. Yo momma''s head so small, she got her ear pierced and died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so poor Yo mama so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said "Moving." Yo mama so poor she can''t afford to pay attention! Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush! Yo mama so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people''s fingers! Yo mama so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!" Yo mama so poor she went to McDonald''s and put a milkshake on layaway. Yo mama so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk. Yo mama so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp. Yo mama so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin''?" She said, "Buying luggage." Yo mama so poor she drives a peanut. Yo mama so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so tall she tripped over a rock and hit her head on the moon. Yo mama so tall she tripped in Michigan and hit her head in Florida.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so bald Yo mamma so bald even a wig wouldn''t help! Yo mamma so bald you can see what''s on her mind Yo mamma so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the mama broom say to the little broom? Go to sweep little one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the teacher and the one who minds trains? The teacher trains minds, the other minds trains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with T, ends with the T and has full of T''s? [You must answer it and write it in the comment box!(hehe)]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a classroom, the teacher tell the pupils that peanuts make your smarter. Then a pupil said: "Are you nuts?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three mischievous boys went to the zoo one day for an outing, since they had been at school all week. They decided to visit the elephant cage, but soon enough, they were picked up by a cop for causing a commotion. The officer hauled them off to security for questioning. The supervisor in charge asked them to give their names and tell what they were doing at the elephant cage. The first boy innocently said, "My name is Gary, and I was just throwing peanuts into the elephant cage." The second added, "My name is Larry, and all I was doing was throwing peanuts into the elephant cage." The third boy was a little shaken up and said, "Well, my name is Peter, but my friends call me Peanuts."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes I think I''m stupid... until I met George W. Bush. Now I feel like the smartest man in the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s late at night, the weather''s terrible, with lashing rain and high winds, when the traveller decides he''s had enough and pulls in to the hotel car park. He grabs a few essentials and makes a dash for the foyer. "Can you let me have a room for the night, please?" he enquires. "Very sorry, sir, we''ve no spare rooms at all," responds the helpful clerk. "You''ve no room at all? I find that hard to believe. I think that if George Dubya arrived now, you''d find a room for him!" "Well, I think we might find something for *him*." "Well, he''s not coming, so I''ll have the room!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jerry, a college freshman, was sitting in his English class. His teacher noticed that he wasn''t paying attention, so asked to see him after class. Jerry went up to the teacher''s desk, and waited while the teacher was talking to a attractive freshman girl. When he was done, he said, "Jerry, why weren''t you paying attention in my class?" "I was staring at the hot babe you were just talking to," Jerry said. "But don''t get any ideas," Jerry said, "you''re way to old for her." "Oh, really?" the teacher said. "Yeah, you''re old enough to be her father!" said Jerry. "This talk is over!" said the teacher. Jerry starts to walk out when the teacher says, "And by the way, Jerry, next class don''t stare at my daughter!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I read right the way through a medical dictionary, and found that the only thing in it I DON''T have is hypochondria!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde named Sharon was sitting at her till at the supermarket. Suddenly, she had an idea that would change the world forever. She had invented mind-mail! She called over her boss and told him. He was astonished and said, "Go on then, send me a mail through your mind!" She did as she was told, and sent him one. The manager then said, "I didn''t quite get that, what was the message?" She replied, "I dunno, work it out for yourself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Submit a joke = I''m a but jokes That''s so stupid = Sadist puts hot .................................. Bonus jokes with my fur = Joy! Swift knob humerus let''s hear a joke = Jerk tease halo (If you guys want that I anagram a sentence you like then post it on the comment box. But only from 7 letters to 30 letters!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Julia, how can you say Asshole in a nicer way? Julia: As holes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if a 500-pound man is a millionaire? (That''s 500-pound fat, not muscle.) Because he will have a totally hot, blonde, babe on his arm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that when she got into an elevator, she exceeded the weight limit. I wonder how many it took to get her in there in the first place?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They misunderestimate me. -Nov. 6, 2000 "Rarely is the question asked: Is out children learning?" -Jan. 11, 2000 "I aim to be a competitive nation." -April 21, 2006', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Drink apple juice, because O.J. will kill you. (O.J. = Orange Juice)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s There? Well Water Well Water Who? Well Water You Waiting For? Open The Door And Let Me IN!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mrs. Biddle was walking down the street one day carrying a small box with holes punched in the top. "What''s in that box?" Mrs. Riddle asked. "A cat," Mrs. Biddle answered. "What for?" "I''ve been dreaming about mice at night, and I''m scared of mice. The cat is to catch them." "But the mice you dream about are imaginary," said Mrs. Riddle. Mrs. Biddle turned to her friend and whispered, "So is the cat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hillary Clinton noticed that she was unusually hungry, having stomache pains, and hasn''t had her period for 2 months. She decides to go a doctor to get checked out. The doctor returns with the diagnosis that she is indeed pregnant. As you can imagine, the first thing she did was call her husband, Bill Clinton. "Honey, I have some news for you. You got me PREGNANT." After a few minutes, Bill''s voice comes back on the line. "Don''t panic. I will sort this out, but first I need to know who you are." *This is not true*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man was walking down the road and saw the priest also walking. Since he knows the priest usually rides a bike he asks where it is. "Well, I woke up this morning and couldn''t find it," he replies. "Oh. Well, here is an idea. When you go over the Ten Commandments in your sermon this morning, bear down real hard on Thou shall not steal. Then, whoever took it will feel guilty and give it back." "Great idea!" Well, that afternoon the man sees the priest riding his bike. "I see they gave it back to you. I knew my idea would work!" he says. "Well, actually I went through the Ten Commandments like you said, but when I got to Thou shall not commit adultery, I remembered where I left my bike!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette jump off of the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Who lands first? \ / \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ The brunette. The blonde has to stop and ask for directions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so hairy... ...you almost died of rugburn at birth! ...she looks like she got Buchwheat in a headlock. ...bigfoot is taking her picture! ...she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so nasty... ...she made speed stick slow down. ...she brings crabs to the beach. ...she made right guard turn left. ...the fishery payed her to leave. ...she has to creep up on bathwater. ...that she pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh. ...I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so old Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and she died. Yo mama so old her social security number is 1! Yo mama so old that when she was in school there was no history class. Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook. Yo mama so old her birth certificate says expired on it. Yo mama so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince. Yo mama so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper. Yo mama so old she ran track with dinosaurs. Yo mama so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s head so large she has to step into her shirts. Yo mama head is so big it shows up on radar. Yo mama''s house is so dirty roaches ride around on dune buggies! Yo mama house so dirty she has to wipe her feet before she goes outside. Yo mama''s teeth are so yellow traffic slows down when she smiles! Yo mama teeth are so yellow she spits butter. Yo mama''s glasses so thick that when she looks on a map she can see people waving. Yo mama''s glasses are so thick she can see into the future. Yo mama''s house is so small that when she orders a large pizza she has to go outside to eat it. Yo mama''s house so small you have to go outside to change your mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man 1: "I was on the television last night." Man 2: "Were you really?" Man 1: "Yeah. When I''m drunk I''ll sleep anywhere."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Manny was almost 29 years old. Most of his friends had already gotten married, and Manny just bounced from one relationship to the next. Finally a friend asked him, "What''s the matter, are you looking for the perfect woman? Are you THAT particular? Can''t you find anyone who suits you?" "No," Manny replied. "I meet a lot of nice girls, but as soon as I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn''t like them. So I keep on looking!" "Listen," his friend suggested, "Why don''t you find a girl who''s just like your dear ole mother?" Many weeks past before Manny and his friend got together again. "So, Manny, did you find the perfect girl yet? One that''s just like your mother?" Manny shrugged his shoulders, "Yes I found one just like Mom. My mother loved her; they became great friends." "Excellent!!! So.... are you and this girl engaged yet?" "I''m afraid not. My father can''t stand her!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Excuse me, is this tuna dolphin-friendly? "Dolphin-friendly? He was only best man at Flipper''s wedding!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her friends at a military camp had been taken out to play a game of paintball. Her team all bundle into their trench and prepare for the game. Suddenly, the whistle blows to signal the start of the game and the group-leader shouts, "Fire at will!" As the rest of the blonde''s group start firing she turns to the group-leader and asks, "Which one''s Will?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas, but there are more Catholic churches than casinos there. Not surprisingly, some worshippers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed. Since they get chips from many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to sort the offerings. The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Fransiscan monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in. This is done by the chip monks. You didn''t even see it coming, did you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Which sea animal is very grumpy? A: The crab!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the middle ages, the monks were only allowed to talk once every year to the priest. They were only allowed two words to say. One year, when a new monk came, the priest told him of this and the monk agreed. After the first year, the monk said in a sad voice, "Bed hard." The priest frowned at him and ushered him away. The next year the poor monk said in a sad voice, "Food cold." The priest scowled at him and told him to go away back to work. The next year the monk said in a sad voice, "Quit job." The priest suddenly shouted, "Finally! You''ve been here three years and all you''ve done is complain!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue?.. and then you add eggs and sugar... and you get cake? Where did the glue go ? NEED AN ANSWER? You know darned well where it went! That''s what makes the cake Stick to your BUTT Now that you''ve smiled at least once, it''s your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle). We all need a good laugh - keep on smilin''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? I don''t know To get the Chinese newspaper Get it? No Neither do I. I get USA Today', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A taxi driver, driving a Mercedes-Benz, picked up a rather simple looking fellow at the airport one day. When the gentleman got in and they started on their way he enquired what the three pinned emblem on the front was for. The driver replied, "Why, it''s for lining it up at people so you can run them down." "Ah, I see," said the man. With this the taxi driver starts heading straight for an elderly woman but at the last second swerves away. He hears a loud bang, he looks curiously over at the passenger who is hanging out of the car with the door wide open: "I thought you were going to miss there for a minute!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy-Bob returns from school and tells his father he got an "F" in Arithmetic today. "Why?" asks his father. "The teacher asked, ''How much is 2 x 3?'' I said, ''6''". "But that''s right," said his father. "Then she asked me ''How much is 3 x 2?''." "What''s the fucking difference?" asks his father. "That''s what I said!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very mean, nasty, unattractive woman enters the Wal-Mart store with her two kids. The Wal-Mart greeter says hello to the kids and then hello to the lady who just grunts at the greeter in return. The greeter asks the lady, "Great kids! Are they twins?" "No," replies the lady, "one is 9 the other is 7. Do they look like twins?" "No," the greeter says, "I just couldn''t believe you could get laid twice."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three Indian women are sitting side by side. The first, sitting on a goatskin, has a son who weighs 170 pounds. The second, sitting on a deerskin, has a son who weighs 130 pounds. The third, seated on a hippopotamus hide, weighs 300 pounds. What famous theorem does this illustrate? The squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws on the other two hides!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A: 101, one to hold the lightbulb and 100 to spin the house!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out. Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred. Marriage is the sole cause of divorce. Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity. Marriage still confers one very special privilege - only a married person can get divorced. Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and around the hands and feet of the man. Marriage: the only sport in which the trapped animal has to buy the license. Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In an American history discussion group, the professor was trying to explain how society''s ideal of beauty changes with time. "For example," he said, "take the 1921 Miss America. She stood five feet, one inch tall, weighed 108 pounds and had measurements of 30-25-32. How do you think she''d do in today''s version of the contest?" The class fell silent for a moment. Then one student piped up, "Not very well." "Why is that?" asked the professor. "For one thing," the student pointed out, "She''d be way too old!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s life is such a failure, when I gave her a dollar she said her life was complete.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a chain mail I recieved. Hi there, Thought For The Day "Good looks catch the eye but a GOOD personality catches the heart. You''re blessed with both!" Don''t be flattered, this message was sent to ME! I just wanted YOU to read it. PASS IT ON.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman just got a new job and her co-workers told her her first assignment: to fire the janitor, Don. The woman was very nervous about doing this, so she decided to get it over with fast. She marched up with her head down and said to the man, "I''m sorry, but you''re fired!" Her co-workers who were watching suddenly started laughing out loud. She looked at the man she fired and he said, "I don''t think you have the right to fire you boss!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The three stages of sex in marriage: Tri-weekly, Try-weekly, Try-weakly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How was your blind date? a college student asked her room-mate. "Terrible!" the room-mate answered. "He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce." "Wow! That''s a very expensive car. What''s so bad about that?" "He was the original owner!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It seems that an elephant got too close to all the baby ducks the circus had brought in for Easter and accidentally inhaled a bunch of them. The poor elephant was choking on them and no one could help. Finally the trainer goosed him -- and the elephant blew out a whole trunkful of downy feathers. That''s what he gets for snorting quack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A women''s lib speaker was addressing a large group and said, "Where would man be today if it were not for woman?" She paused a moment and looked around the room. "I repeat, where would man be today if it were not for woman?" From the back of the room came a voice, "He''d be in the Garden of Eden eating strawberries."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The boss returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up. Everybody, except one girl, laughed uproariously. "What''s the matter?" grumbled the boss. "Haven''t you got a sense of humor?" "I don''t have to laugh," she replied. "I''m leaving Friday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was 50 Cent''s daughter named? Penny!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re screwed when you fall in love with a woman you see at the mall, then realize that she is your sister.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many presidents does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They''ll only promise change.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None ''o yo'' fuckin'' business!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. and Mrs. Wong are a married couple who live in China. After being married for three years, they decided to have a baby. They ended up having a baby girl with mental disabilities. They named her ''Somting Wong''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Adult Male', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper. MYTH: A female moth. MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better. RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn. SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time. SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off. TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction. TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today. YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed. WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Father Sullivan was ministering to a man on his deathbed. "Renounce Satan!" yelled Father Sullivan. "No," said the dying man. "I say, renounce the devil and his works!" "No," the man repeats. "And why, in the name of all that is holy, not?" asks Father Sullivan. "Because," said the dying man, "I want to wait until I see where I''m heading before I start annoying anybody."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('US tourists, a man and his wife are traveling in the Middle East. An Arab approaches the husband, saying, "I''ll give you 100 camels for your woman." After a long silence, the husband says, "She''s not for sale." The indignant wife says, "What took you so long to answer?" The husband replied, "I was trying to figure out how to get 100 camels back home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m only here in spirit at the moment, but if you''ll leave your name and number, I will get back to you as soon as I''m here in person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun who worked for a local home health care agency was out making her rounds when she ran out of gas. As luck would have it, there was a station just down the street. She walked to the station to borrow a can with enough gas to start the car and drive to the station for a fill up. The attendant regretfully told her that the only gas can he owned had just been loaned out, but if she would care to wait he was sure it would be back shortly. Since the nun was on the way to see a patient she decided not to wait and walked back to her car. After looking through her car for something to carry to the station to fill with gas, she spotted a bedpan she was taking to the patient. Always resourceful, she carried it to the station, filled it with gasoline, and carried it back to her car. As she was pouring the gas into the tank of her car, two men walked by. One of them turned to the other and said: "Now that is what I call faith!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men walked into a bar. They died', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anyways, there was an assembly at school and they had us sit on bleachers inside the main gym. Then I notice one of my friends walk in and since there''s a space next to me, I decide to call him over. But the thing is, his nickname is fire, because of his bright red hair. So I yell out FIRE! loud enough for him to hear me over the noise. Then I realize what I just did... everyone in my section of the bleachers just stared at me until a teacher came and pulled me off to the side for a little talk. This has been a Stupid Drunky Moment. (By the way, if you think I''m stupid, think about the other students. If someone yells fire, you run, you don''t turn around and stare at him. Idiots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A daddy was listening to his child say his prayer "Dear Harold." At this, dad interrupted and said, "Wait a minute, why did you call God ''Harold''?" The little boy looked up and said, "That''s what they call Him in church. You know the prayer we say, "Our Father, who art in Heaven, Harold be Thy name..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rate this joke 4 smiles and g I''ll give you $5 Stop here and rate now Read the rest after you vote You don''t need to read the comments now Vote Now NOW NOW!!!! NOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOWNOW DID YOU VOTE 4? PLEASE PZ puL eASE pull with ease Now vote Alright, you voted Good job Read on Keep scrolling All the way When you''re all the way down, please comment I''ll give you another $5 Vote 4 get $5 Commment get $5 Both get $10 Both get $20 dollars $50 each $200 together Ya done? One more thing PSYCH hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahah', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the last teacher quit, a new teacher was hired. On her first day of work, she saw "AAFTWC" on the board. "What is the meaning of this?" the new teacher asked. A white kid stood up and replied, "An apple from the white children." On her second day, the teacher walked in, and saw "AOFTBC" on the board. She asked who wrote it and what it meant. A black kid stood up and said, "An orange from the black children. On the third day, the teacher almost fainted when she saw "F***1T" written on the board. "THAT''S IT! WHO WROTE THIS, AND WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!?" A Mexican stood up and told her, "From us chicano kids, 1 tamale."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ere is a chasm of carbon and silicon the software can''t bridge. Yesterday it worked Today it is not working Windows is like that To have no errors Would be life without meaning No struggle, no joy You step in the stream, but the water has moved on. This page is not here. No keyboard present Hit F1 to continue Zen engineering? Hal, open the file Hal, open the damn file, Hal Open the file, please Hal Out of memory. We wish to hold the whole sky, But we never will. Having been erased, The document you''re seeking Must now be retyped. The ten thousand things How long do any persist? Netscape, too, has gone. Rather than a beep Or a rude error message, These words: "File not found." Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared Screen. Mind. Both are blank.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s There. OMG OMG who? OMG! How long has that cookie been in your Lunch Box?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s feet smell so bad that her shoes committed suicide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Arachnoleptic Fit (n.) The frantic dance performed just after you''ve accidentally walked through a spider web. Beelzebug (n.) Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at 3 in the morning and cannot be cast out. Bozone (n.) The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. Cashtration (n.) The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of key can''t open a door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What kind of key can''t open a door. A monkey', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('newf is cool timmy cool is cool battery is cool girliepie is cool newf is cool drunky is cool all on my buddy list are cool all on wocka are cool all on braingle are cool all on earth are cool all in the many universes are cool I just said you''re cool vote full funny to agree you''re cool schatzy228 is an @$$hole', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Swiss man, looking for directions, pulls up at a bus stop where two Englishmen were waiting. "Entschuldigung, sprechen Sie Deutsches?" he asks. The Englishmen just stare at him. "M''excusez-vous, parlez-vous franais ?" They continue to stare. "Lo scusate, parlate italiano?" No response. "Me excusa, usted habla espaol?" Still nothing. The Swiss man drives off in disgust. One Englishman says to the other, "Y''know, maybe we ought to learn a foreign language." "Why?" says the other. "That feller knew 4 languages, and it didn''t do him any good!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three contractors are at a theme park to bid for a job repairing fences one is from New York, one from Texas and the third from Florida. First to bid is the Florida contractor. He measures up and says, "Well, I reckon we''ll do the job for $900. That''s $400 for materials, $400 for the men, and $100 for me." Next is the Texan, who measures up and says, "I''ll do the job for $700, that''s $300 for materials, $300 for my men, and $100 for me." The man from New York doesn''t even stand up. He says, "$2700." The park owner, incredulous, says, "You didn''t even measure the job! How did you arrive at that price?" "Easy," says the New Yorker. "$1000 for you, $1000 for me, and we hire the Texan."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The blonde arrived at work, looking very bleary-eyed and tired. "What''s wrong with you?" asked her friend. "I was up half the night," came the reply. "And why was that?" "I was waiting for the cat to come home, so I could put her out for the night."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, a Frenchman and Angelina Jolie are sitting together in a train travelling through Switzerland when the train enters a tunnel, and everything goes dark. There''s a kissing noise, and then the sound of a slap. When the train comes out of the tunnel, Angelina Jolie and the Englishman are sitting there as if nothing has happened, and the Frenchman is holding a slapped face. The Frenchman is thinking, "That Englishman must have kissed Angelina and she swung at him, missed, and slapped me." Angelina Jolie is thinking, "That French guy must have tried to kiss me, kissed the Englishman by mistake, and got slapped." The Englishman is thinking, "This is great. When we go through the next tunnel, I''ll kiss the back of my hand again, and slap that French guy again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Faunacated (adj.) How wildlife ends up when its environment is destroyed. Hence Faunacatering (v.), which has made a meal of many species. Grantartica (n.) The cold, isolated place where art companies dwell without funding. Hemaglobe (n.) The bloody state of the world. Kinstirpation (n.) A painful inability to move relatives who come to visit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember when ram meant just a male sheep And bugs and worms were just things that creep? When a gopher and a mouse were li''l critters And virus were microbes that gave one the shivers? When a web was a sticky net that housed a spider And nets were just strings all woven together? When surfing was just riding an ocean wave And a slip was dodging trouble with a close shave? When a mime was a painted-face animated mute clown And hackers were people who slashed things down? When menus and servers were all about eating And addresses and homes were places for living? When Archie and Veronica were actually people And trolls were pests that were considered mythical? When mud was just slime and Spam was just food And to ''finger'' someone was not considered good? When to chat and to talk still needed a voice...? Now being online has all but mooted that choice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A normally sweet Great Dane, Psil, has one quirk: she hates United Parcel Service drivers. While walking Psil one day, around the corner of a house came a UPS man. Struggling to keep hold of Psil, the owner, trying to ease the situation, said, "As you can see, he just loves UPS men." "Don''t you feed him anything else?" he responded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What are the three questions most commonly asked by lawyers? 1. How much money do you have? 2. Where can you get more? 3. Do you have anything you can sell?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In most offices, the photocopier is out of order every now and then. One copy repairman had answered question after question for the employees. Finally one day, he just smiled and handed them this sheet. The copier is out of order! Yes, we have called the service man. Yes, he will be in today. No, we cannot fix it. No, we do not know how long it will take. No, we do not know what caused it. No, we do not know who broke it. Yes, we are keeping it. No, we do not know what you are going to do now. Thank You', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, she fell off a donkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('make a hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat, when she walked past the TV, I missed a whole episode off MTV''s grand finale of Making the Van!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girliepie has one that is really embarrassing! I tell it from her point of view - It was the next to last day of school and I was walking in the hall with my friends. I saw my friend Jacob a few feet away from me, so I decided to say hi. We always play around, so I went up behind him and put my arm around him and said, "Hey sexy". He turned around and looked at me and it wasn''t him! It was some kid I''ve never seen before in my life! My face turned beet red!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she tried to hijack a plane she couldn''t fit through the door. Yo momma''s so stupid that when she tried to hijack a plane, she killed the driver, put it on auto pilot, and let it fly her straight into an army camp. The soldiers on the plane were laughing their testicles off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so fat that when she goes to the beach she''s the only one that gets a tan!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honk if you''ve never seen an Uzi fired from a car window. If you can read this, my wife fell off! (Seen on the back of a biker''s vest.) If you can beat me, you can eat me! (Seen on a Corvette driven by a "drop-dead gorgeous blonde.") Remember: Stop lights timed for 35mph are also timed for 70mph. GUYS: No shirt, no service. GALS: No shirt, no charge. I didn''t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian. Heart Attacks...God''s Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends We have enough youth, how about a fountain of smart? Boldly going nowhere. Cat: The other white meat. Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway He''s not dead, He''s electro-encephalographically challenged If you can''t dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets If you lived in your car, you''d be home by now WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so poor she has only got two channels on her T.V. : ''on'' and ''off''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Indian lined up all of his ten sons and stood in front of them. He then asked, "Who push port-a-potty over cliff?" Nobody answered him. He then asked again, "Who push port-a-potty over cliff?" And again nobody answered. The old Indian said, "I tell story of Georgie and Georgie father. Georgie chop down cherry tree. Georgie tell truth, Big Georgie no punish. Little Indian tell truth, I no punish." So the Indian asked again, "Who push port-a-potty over cliff?" The littlest Indian replied, "I push port-a-potty over cliff. " The old Indian then shakes him, spanks him, does everything he can to punish him. When he is done, the little Indian asks, "Georgie tell truth, Georgie no get punish. I tell truth, I get punished. Why you punish?" The old Indian replied, "Big Georgie not in cherry tree when it got chopped down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 4-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, soaking in the whole event. The man thought, "Great...he''s 4 and I''m gonna have to start explaining the birds and bees. No need to jump the gun - I''ll just let him ask, and I''ll answer." After everything was over, the man walked over to his son and said, "Well son, do you have any questions?" "Just one," gasped the still wide-eyed lad. "How fast was that calf going when he hit that cow?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence. Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain? A: After a dye job. Q: Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes? A: They''re doing research on black holes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do peroxide blondes and black men have in common? A: They both have black roots. Q: Why are there no dumb brunettes? A: Peroxide. Q: How do you tell if a bleach blonde did your landscaping? A: The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirate''s favourite branch of the military? The Arrrmy... no, the Navy, he''s a pirate!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it''s our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you''d like to have dinner with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hawt het hlle ma i redanig?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the squirrel sleep on his stomach? To keep his nuts warm!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the tie say to the hat? You go on a head, I''ll just hang around.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s there? Kanga. Kanga who? No! Kangaroo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Got to Get You Into My Sights I Put a Shell in You You''ve Shot a Friend Huntin'', Shootin'', Drinkin'' Dude Looked Like a Birdie', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiter, I''d a cup of coffee, please, no cream. "I''m sorry, sir, we''re out of cream. Would you have it with no milk?" "Waiter, this coffee tastes like mud!" "Well, it was ground this morning!" "Tea or coffee, gentlemen?" asked the waiter. "I''ll have tea," replied the first customer. "Me too and be sure the cup is clean!" Soon, the waiter returns with two cups of tea. "Two teas," he says. "And which of you gentleman asked for a clean cup?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I ran into an old buddy the other day. He was a rising entrepreneur, but now he looked down and out. What gives? He begins wailing his tale. "I had a restaurant out there on the interstate, you know. Spent a fortune on a new high-rise sign to attract traffic. It did, too. It read ''free cocktail with dinner!'' The ''cocktail'' was flashing red neon. Was it impressive!" "Sounds like a good idea. So what went wrong?" "Oh, the county took notice, inspection crews come out, I''m harassed all the time by the Planning department, the churches in the neighborhood have filed compaints-" "Hey, I thought you ran a stand-up operation out there." "I did. Half my flashing red neon burned out!" "Oh, I see..." I thought a minute. "Which half?" "Don''t make no difference!" he wailed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Late one night at the insane asylum one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!" Another one said, "How do you know?" The first inmate said, "God told me!" Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did NOT!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three members of a motorcycle gang walked in. The first walked up to the old man and pushed his cigarette into the old man''s pie, and then took a seat at the counter. The second walked up to the old man and spat into the old man''s milk, and then he took a seat at the counter. The third walked up to the old man and turned over the old man''s plate, and then he took a seat at the counter. Without a word of protest, the old man quietly left the diner. Shortly thereafter, one of the bikers said to the waitress, "Humph, not much of a man, was he?" The waitress replied, "Not much of a truck driver either. He just backed his truck over three motorcycles."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the little girls put minnows in their pants? A: So they could smell like big girls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If we could shrink the earth''s population to a village of 100 people, with everything else remaining the same, it would look like this: There would be: * 57 Asians * 21 Europeans * 14 from the Western Hemisphere, * 8 Africans, * 52 would be female * 48 would be male * 70 would be non-white * 30 would be white * 70 would be non-Christian * 30 would be Christian * 95 would be heterosexual * 5 would be homosexual * 6 people would own 59% of the world''s wealth, and all 6 would be from the United States and male. * 80 would live in substandard housing * 70 would be unable to read * 50 would suffer from malnutrition * 1 would be near death * 1 would be near birth * 1 would have a college education * 1 would own a computer * 0 would play oboe', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smart Boss + Smart Employee = Profit Smart Boss + Dumb Employee = Production Dumb Boss + Smart Employee = Promotion Dumb Boss + Dumb Employee = Overtime', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So this chicken walks into the library, and she walks up to the librarian and she says: "Book." The librarian says: "You want a book?" "Book." "Any book?" "Book." So the librarian gives the chicken a novel and off she goes. An hour later the chicken comes back and says, "Book-book" The librarian says: "Now you want two books?" "Book-book." So she gives the chicken two more novels. The chicken leaves but she comes back soon. "Book-book-book." "Three books?" "Book-book-book." So the librarian gives the chicken three books, but she decides she''ll follow the chicken and find out what''s going on. The chicken goes down the alley, and out of town and towards the woods, into the woods and down to the river, down to the swamp, and there is a bullfrog. The chicken sets the books down by him, and he looks at them and says: "Reddit...Reddit...Reddit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so poor, when I told her she eats dirt, she said to me,"No way, that stuff is for rich people!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser, with an experienced partner. A call came in, telling them to disperse some people who were loitering. The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner. The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let''s get off the corner, people." A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again, "Let''s get off that corner... NOW!" Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction. Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?" "Pretty good," chuckled the vet, "especially since this is a bus stop."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A duck, a skunk, and a frog go to the movies. Tickets cost one dollar. Which animal doesn''t get in? The skunk! The frog has a green back, the duck has a bill, but the skunk only has a scent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elephant was drinking out of a river one day, when he spotted a turtle asleep on a log. He ambled on over and kicked it clear across the river. "What did you do that for?" asked a passing giraffe. "Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 53 years ago." "Wow, what a memory!" commented the giraffe. "Yes," said the elephant, "turtle recall."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so stupid, that when the power went out, she said, "Don''t worry, we''ll just watch a tape."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call a redneck family reunion? A: An orgy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years. The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board looking over an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump. The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms. Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs. The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump. "Congratulations! You''re a free man. Just tell me why didn''t you jump?" asked the doctor. To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can''t swim!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A visitor to a certain college paused to admire the new Hemingway Hall that had been built on campus. "It''s a pleasure to see a building named for Ernest Hemingway," he said. "Actually," said his guide, "it''s named for Joshua Hemingway. No relation." The visitor was astonished. "Was Joshua Hemingway a writer, also?" "Yes, indeed," said his guide. "He wrote a check."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The French will eat almost anything. A young cook decided that the French would enjoy feasting on rabbits and decided to raise rabbits in Paris and sell them to the finer restaurants in the city. He searched all over Paris seeking a suitable place to raise his rabbits. None could be found. Finally, an old priest at the cathedral said he could have a small area behind the rectory for his rabbits. He successfully raised a number of them, and when he went about Paris selling them, a restaurant owner asked him where he got such fresh rabbits. The young man replied, "I raise them myself, near the cathedral. In fact, I have a hutch back of Notre Dame.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A scientist has come up with proof of something students have known for years -- chemistry lectures are boring. In an article published in the current issue of Chemistry in Britain, a university chemistry lecturer introduced a guest lecturer to a class of 50 doctoral candidates. Then, he and his colleagues studied variations in what he calls the HTFDR -- "head-to-floor distance reduction." After about an hour , the average HTFDR dropped from 135cm to 121cm, said the author of the study, who preferred to remain anonymous. The HTFDR immediately bounced back to normal when the speaker uttered the magic words: "And in conclusion..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy took his blonde girlfriend on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment: the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune. The first day they go fishing, but they don''t catch anything. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, the guy catches a fish. As they''re driving home, they''re really depressed. The guy turns to his girlfriend and says, "Do you realize that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred dollars?" The girlfriend says, "Wow! It''s a good thing we didnt catch any more!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do Roman paramedics refer to an IV as a four?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so big, that when she farts, she destroys the ozone layer above her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a messed up family, the child named Hope is goth, and the child named Faith is atheist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat, when she went into a sumo wrestling match, they said, "Sorry, no professionals allowed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many women on their periods does it take to change a light bulb? - - - O N E ! ! , YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two friends, who haven''t met for a couple of years, are catching up with each other''s news. One says, "And then the doctor said he''d have me back on my feet in a fortnight!" His pal says, "Well, did he?" "He sure did, I had to sell my car to pay him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did your parents have any kids that lived?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday, All those backups seemed a waste of pay. Now my database has gone away. Oh I believe in yesterday. Suddenly, There''s not half the files there used to be, And there''s a milestone hanging over me The system crashed so suddenly. I pushed something wrong What it was I could not say. Now all my data''s gone and I long for yesterday-ay-ay-ay. Yesterday, The need for back-ups seemed so far away. I knew my data was all here to stay, Now I believe in yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a redneck when your stair master has an ashtray!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly lady was well-known for her faith and for her boldness in talking about it. She would stand on her front porch and shout "PRAISE THE LORD!" Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, "There ain''t no Lord!!" Hard times set in on the elderly lady, and she prayed for God to send her some assistance. She stood on her porch and shouted "Praise the Lord! God, I need food!! I am having a hard time. Please, Lord, send me some groceries!!" The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted, "PRAISE THE LORD!" The neighbor jumped from behind a bush and said, "Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries; God didn''t." The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said, "Praise the Lord! He not only sent me groceries, but He made the devil pay for them. Praise the Lord!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are in a car travelling at a constant speed. On your left is a valley, and on your right is a fire engine travelling at the same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping pig which is the same size as your car, and you can''t overtake it. Behind you is a helicopter, flying at ground level; both are travelling at the same speed as you. What must you do to get out of this highly dangerous situation? Get off the merry-go-round!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam and Abe, in their late seventies, first met years ago in the second grade. Their relationship now is mostly playing cards, telling jokes and making bets. Sam calls Abe and says, "I got a bet for you: I bet you that mine is longer soft than yours is hard. A thousand dollars!" Abe says, "How can that be? If you knew anything about biology, you ..." Sam interrupts, "I called for a bet, not a lecture. Mine is longer soft than yours is hard, ...a thousand dollars, ...yes or no!!" Abe says, "Okay, okay, I''ll take your bet! How long is yours soft?" Sam says, "Eleven years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why has Edward Woodward got 4 d''s in his name? If he hadn''t he would be Ewar Woowar!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s red and invisible? No tomato.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking around and I saw somebody selling a shirt that said this: F.B.I. Female Body Inspector', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is entered later by a computer tech into their database. One theft report stated that a farmer had lost 2,025 pigs. Thinking that to be an error, the tech called the farmer directly. "Is it true Mr. (Smith) that you lost 2,025 pigs?" she asked. "Yeth," lisped the farmer. Being a Howard County girl herself, the tech entered: "Subject lost 2 sows and 25 pigs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary Clancy goes up to Father O''Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she''s in tears. He says, "So what''s bothering you, dear?" She says, "Oh, Father, I''ve got terrible news. My husband passed away last night." The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that''s terrible. Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?" She says, "That he did, Father..." The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?" She says, "He said, ''Please, Mary, put down that darned gun!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For a complete breakdown of how points are calculated, please read the Site Rules. You can get to the site rules by going to the FAQ''s and the first answer gives you a link to the Site Rules.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jokes are not immediately available to all users until they are voted by other users at least 10 times. This is to assure that the rating of the joke is accurate and that it does not violate the "Terms and Conditions" of this website. If you have your preferences set to not hide any jokes then you will be able to see jokes with fewer than 10 votes in the "Unrated Jokes" section.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('G: Jokes rated G are acceptable for everyone. No bad language and no violence or sexual references are in these jokes. PG: These jokes are suitable for most children. Mild violence or language may appear in these jokes. PG13: These jokes may contain some bad language or violence. Some mild sexual content may also appear in these jokes. R: These jokes contain foul language and sexual or violent content. You can go to "My Account"---"Edit Account" and filter out jokes you don''t want to see.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Not to be confused with the Daily Joke Newsletter, a subscription to a joke means that it will appear on your "View Subscriptions" page. This allows you to keep up-to-date on the conversation/comments of your favorite jokes. To subscribe, click the checkbox at the bottom of the comment box on the joke page. You can always unsubscribe at any time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can report duplicates once you get 100 points. For every duplicate that you correctly report, you get 10 points. You can also help by verifying duplicates that other users have reported. For every verification, you get 1 point (regardless of whether you vote yes or no). If you vote for a duplicate that you reported you DO NOT get any points. If you report 2 duplicate jokes and 1 of them is yours, you DO NOT get any points.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An editor is someone who has earned enough points to "unlock" certain features of the website. Editors have certain degrees of ability to modify the jokes on this website. Here is a list of the requirements and privileges given to those who meet the requirements. You do not need to ask to become an editor. If you meet the requirements you automatically have those privileges.(Note: You may not get those privileges if you exhibit bad behavior toward the website.) Level 0: (100 Points) You can report and verify duplicate jokes. Level 1: (500 Points) You can suggest and verify corrections to jokes in order to improve spelling, grammar and other errors. Level 2: (1000 Points) Your votes on jokes count as double (but you still only get 1 point for a vote) Level 3: (4000 Points) Your votes on jokes count as triple (but you still only get 1 point for a vote)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On rare circumstances the behavior of a user of this site is deemed so inappropriate that they will not be allowed to become an editor even with the correct number of points or even if they were already an editor when they had the bad behavior. Bad behavior includes such things as registering multiple fake accounts, submitting jokes that are not jokes, or that are abusive to other users of the website, or submitting false duplicate reports or misusing the joke-correction functionality of this website.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please contact us. We are happy to answer questions, and we are always eager to make Wocka.com a better place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Registered users win points for submitting and voting on jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- OK, . . . . so what''s the speed of dark? - When everything is coming your way, you''re in the wrong lane. - Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. - Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don''t have film. - How much deeper would', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Save the whales. Collect the whole set. - A day without sunshine is like...night. - On the other hand, you have different fingers - 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. - 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. - Remember, hal', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side! ************************************************************ Q: Why did the punk rock star cross the road? A: Because he was stapled to the chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Users to accumulate 5,000 points are rewarded with having no advertisements shown to them on this website. You can also get icons that appear next to your name once you have achieved certain goals. Awards are described on the icon page. You can get to the icon page by clicking an icon next to someone''s username.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thank you for using Wocka.com. This page states the terms and conditions under which you may use the web site. It is important that you read this page carefully because by opening our web site you agree to be bound, without limitation or qualification, by these terms. If you do not accept any of the terms stated here then do not use the web site. This web site may, in it''s sole discretion, modify or revise these terms at any time by updating this web page. You are bound by any such modification or revision and should therefore visit this page periodically to review the terms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very homely person made an appointment with a psychiatrist. The homely person walked into the doctor''s office and said, "Doctor, I''m so depressed and lonely. I don''t have any friends, no one will come near me, and everybody laughs at me. Can you help me accept my ugliness?" "I''m sure I can," the psychiatrist replied. "Just go over and lie face down on that couch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad: Son what is the difference a penis and a loaf of bread? Son: I don''t know. Dad: Then remind me to never send you to the store for a loaf of bread.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First, go to Wocka''s Joke Home Page. There you will see the Daily Joke of the Day. In that box, (in the bottom-right corner) there are 3 links. The bottom link says "Get Daily Jokes Via E-Mail"; that is what you click. Make sure we have your correct email address and press the button: Newsletter Your Email Address: Subscribe Unsubscribe Do It We hate spam just as much as you do. Your email address will never be shared or sold to anyone. Your information is kept private and is only used for sending the daily joke. You can unsubscribe at any time by following the link at the bottom of the daily email or by coming back to this page. If you are under the age of 13, please get your parents approval before submitting your email address. Please read our Privacy Policy for more information.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We are rated with RSAC i, SafeSurf TM Rated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your joke was submitted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was meeting his girlfriend''s parents for the first time for dinner. After dinner, his girlfriend and her mother left the room to do the dishes, leaving him with the father and the dog Duke, who was sitting underneath the boy''s chair. Unfortunately, it was a large dinner and he really had to fart. He stealthily let out a quiet, but audible, fart. "Duke!" the dad yelled. "This is great!" the boy thought. "He thinks the dog is farting!" So he let out another one. "Duke!" the father barked. The boy thought he was homefree so he let everything out at once in a really loud and smelly fart. "Duke! Get out of there before the boy sh*ts on you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend in need . . . . . .is a damn nuisance.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Imagine you are stuck in a cell, no windows, no doors pretty much nothing. How do you get out? A: -Stop imagining!-', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every second one! I figure, no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three for each three they unlock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Maybe it''s true that life begins at 40. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out. There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory, the other two I forget. Middle age is when it takes longer to rest than to get tired.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I finally got my boss to laugh, said one friend to another after work. "Oh, how?" "I asked for a raise!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was a slow worker and found it difficult to hold down a job. After a visit to the employment office, he was offered work at the local zoo. When he arrived for his first day, the keeper, aware of his reputation, told him to take care of the tortoise section. Later, the keeper dropped by to see how the young man was doing and found him standing by an empty enclosure with the gate open. "Where are the tortoises?" he asked. "I can''t believe it," said the new employee, "I just opened the door and whooooosh, they were gone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Slow people always walk side by side, even if they don''t know each other. 2. They drive side by side, too. If they can''t find another slow driver to pair up with, they drive in the fast lane. 3. Slow walkers never look back. When they drive, they never look in their rear view mirrors, either. 4. Slow people drift sideways so they''ll block the path of anyone trying to pass them. If two people or vehicles are trying to get around them at the same time, they drift into the path of the one that is moving at the highest speed. 5. Follow behind a slow person in the grocery store and you''ll wind up with soggy ice cream every time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men, a Scotsman, a Frenchman, and an Englishman were given a sentence of life inprisonment for manslauter in Saudi Arabia. When they got to the trial the judge said, "It is my daughter''s birthday, so you will only be lashed 100 times." They went to the whipman and he said, "Today is my birthday, you may all have a wish" The Frenchman, who went firstm said, "I would like a pillow strapped to my back. "He got 33 painless lashes until the pillow broke. He then got hit 77 times on his back. The Scotsman asked for two pillows. He got 66 painless lashes until the pillows broke. Then got 34 whips on his back. The whipman said to the englishman, "England is a noble country, therefore you may have two wishes. The Englishman said,"Thank you, my first wish is to increase my number of whippings to the maximum 1000. My second wish is to have the frenchman strapped to my back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it weren''t for Venetian blinds, it would be curtains for everybody.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin Pi!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wanted to learn how to make ice cream, so I started attending sundae school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My teacher always used to tell me that double negatives are a real no-no.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was a story told to us by our chemistry master at school. A female student wished to make some potassium hydroxide solution (aqueous) and decided to throw a large lump of potassium into a bucket of water. Her professor observed what she was about to do, out of the corner of his eye and hurried towards her, and after confirming this was what she was intending to do, asked her first to stir the water in the bucket for five minutes before adding the potassium. She was puzzled and ran after him to ask the purpose of this action. ''It will give me time to get away'' said the professor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock. Who''s there? Sherwood. Sherwood who? Sherwood like to meet you, so open the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the older lightbulb say to the younger lightbulb? A: You''re too young to go out tonight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a girl with a lisp. She couldn''t pronounce her c''s or s''s so she would just leave them out. One day she was going to the bathroom and started singing "I''ve Got Peace Like a River."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde (let''s call her Blonde #1) and her twin sister (let''s call her Blonde #2) were celebrating the twin''s birthday and Blonde#2 gave Blonde#1 a present. Blonde#1: "Oh, thank you so much! When''s your birthday? I have to start planning what to get you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found this on a can of Juicey-Juice 100% Juice. Just add water.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why could Long John Silver never find an aspirin? A: ''Cause his parrots ate them all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do bakers with a sense of humor bake wry bread?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Psychiatrist: What''s your problem? Patient: I think I''m a chicken. Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on? Patient: Ever since I was an egg!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A quite sobered-up drunk is at Sunday mass listening to a long boring sermon. Feeling still hungover and tired, he finally nods out hoping no one will notice. The priest has been watching him all along and at the end of the sermon, decides to make an example out of him. "Who in this room would like a place in heaven, please stand up," he exclaims. The whole room stands up, except, of course, for one. Obviously displeased, he now says loudly, "And he who would like to find a place in hell please STAND UP." The man, catching only the last part, groggily stands up, only to find that he''s the only one standing up. Confused and embarrassed he says, "I don''t know what we''re voting on here, Father, but sure seems like you and me are the only ones standing for it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A: One drunk Irishman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After picking up food for his daughter''s cat, George spied a new bowl for the pet and grabbed it too. "Shall I have the cat''s name written on the side of the bowl?" offered the store owner. "No, don''t bother," replied George. "He can''t read anyway."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, in a busy lounge in the deep south, a reindeer walked in the door, bellied up to the bar, and ordered a martini. Without batting an eye, the bartender mixed and poured the drink, set it in front of the reindeer, and accepted the twenty-dollar bill from the reindeer''s hoof. As he handed the reindeer some coins in change he said, "You know, I think you''re the first reindeer I''ve ever seen in here." The reindeer looked hard at the hoof full of change and said, "Hmmmpf. Let me tell you something buddy. At these prices I''m the last reindeer you''ll see in here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other. - During your initial consultation, he tries to sell you Amway. - He tells you that his last good case was a "Budweiser." - During the trial you catch him playing his Gameboy. - He ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went into the kitchen, and there was a tap on the window. Not using that plumber again!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two wrongs do not make a right, but three rights make a left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is that right, that you Dubliners always answer a question with another question? "Now, who would be telling you that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Dustin Dustin who? Dust in the air, please let me in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she didn''t have enough food, she rang 911.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING: SOME PEOPLE MAY FIND THIS RACIST, ALTHOUGH I MEAN NO OFFENCE. What do you call a Pakistani in a microwave? Ba-ding!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A scientist is researching storms, so he goes out to find one. He takes his blonde assistant to help him find one. They drive for miles until they come to some plains. They stop the car and the scientist tells the blonde to look out for tornados. After a few minutes, a cow flies past due to strong winds and the blonde says, "Look! A flying cow!" The scientist writes this down on his notepad but as he does, the car gets swept away by a tornado. The car lands in a ditch after the tornado had gone. The scientist got out and shouted at the blonde, "I thought you were looking out for tornados!" "I was, but after I saw the cow, I was looking for the dish running away with the spoon."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Candy. Candy who? Candy door even open?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your Mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bunch of girls had become upset at an anthropology professor who had a knack of offending women. They decided the next time he did something offensive they would all stand up and walk out of his class. Sure enough, at the very next class meeting while discussing a tribe of African natives, the professor leered and said, "You''ll be interested to know the average tribal warrior there has a cock twelve inches long." The girls all rose in a large mass and headed for the door. The professor sneered and said, "What''s your hurry, girls? The next flight to there isn''t until Saturday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gang of counterfeiters get a new extremely expensive printing machine, and at great expense, buy some plates, which they were assured were 99.9% perfect. They buy a large consignment of paper which also was virtually identical to the real paper. Gleefully, they switch on the machine and print a few off. They were delighted with the quality of the paper, the inks, and the printing itself - it would fool the best investigators in the whole world - if it wasn''t for the fact that the notes were all 18 notes! What were they to do? Eventually, someone suggested going over to Ireland, and changing some of their 18 notes - those stupid Irish wouldn''t realise they were being conned! A few days later, and they''re in a small Irish pub in the back of beyond, and they ask if they could change one of their beautiful 18 notes. "Sure, no problem," says the barman. "Would you like 3 6 notes or 2 9?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyer: "Judge, I wish to appeal my client''s case on the basis of newly discovered evidence." Judge: "And what is the nature of the new evidence?" Lawyer: "Judge, I discovered that my client still has $500 left."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Only in America can a pizza guy get to your door faster than an ambulance. - Why do slow-down and slow-up mean the same thing? - Why are wise man and wise guy opposites? - Why is it that when stuff goes on a truck it''s called a shipment and on a boat it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An independent woman started her own business. She was shrewd and diligent, so business kept coming in. Pretty soon she realized she needed an in-house counsel and so she began interviewing young lawyers. "As I''m sure you can understand," she started off with one of the first applicants, "in a business like this, our personal integrity must be beyond question." She leaned forward; "Mr. Peterson, are you an ''honest'' lawyer?" "Honest?" replied the job prospect. "Let me tell you something about honest. Why, I''m so honest that my dad lent me fifteen thousand dollars for my education and I paid back every penny the minute I tried my very first case." "Impressive. And what sort of case was that?" He squirmed in his seat and admitted, "My dad sued me for the money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes up to his best friend and says, "Dude, I need you to do something for me, no questions asked." "Okay," says the friend. "What is it?" "I said no questions!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl was calling her boyfriend because he wasn''t online and she wanted him to be. "Hello?" he said, groggily. "I want you to get up and get your ass online." she said. "How?" "I don''t know. Get a scanner if you need to. Just get your ass online!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a small southern town there was a "Nativity Scene" that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it. One small feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing firemen''s helmets. Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation, I left. At a "Quik Stop" on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets. She exploded into a rage, yelling at me, "You stupid Yankees never do read the Bible!" I assured her that I did, but simply couldn''t recall anything about firemen in the Bible. She jerked her Bible from behind the counter and ruffled through some pages, and finally jabbed her finger at a passage. Sticking it in my face, she said, "See, it says right here, ''The three wise man came from afar.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Know why men are men and women are WOmen? Men keep saying - WO man, check out her boobs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a teenaged girl name Amanda, who just stepped out of the shower. She wrapped a towel around her body, and went into her room. She was very excited because her long time crush, Jason, was coming over to have dinner. She turned the radio on and her favorite song was playing, so she started to dance and sing. When the song was over she stopped dancing and realized that her towel had come off. She looked towards the door and saw that it was open, and Jason was standing there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With over %d jokes submitted and ranked by users like you, Wocka has the largest collection anywhere on the internet. All of these jokes have been submitted by user like you. Join our community and chat with your fellow commedians and jokers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An active message board with hundreds of topics in which to participate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Send private messages to your friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('First click the Community button. Then click the Public Fourum button. The first forum is for writing jokes. Discuss how to write funny jokes here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have a funny story? Share it here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Play or chat about games in here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Talk about anything you want here. O.K. I will. You really need to quit submitting jokes like this. Anybody agree with me?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TV, Movies, Music, Books...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?" The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry." Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, "What are you thinking now?" He replied, "It looks as if I did a pretty good job."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Emily, I don''t know what to do, Gloria said to her friend at work. "That good-looking Alan in accounting asked me out for Saturday night. Should I go?" "Oh, my gosh," her friend exclaimed. "He''ll wine you, dine you, and then use any ruse to get you up to his apartment. Then he''ll rip off your dress and you''ll have fantastic sex!" "What should I do?" "Wear an old dress."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These guidelines are not hard rules for submitting acceptable jokes, but they will help you submit a jokes that the most people will enjoy and rank highly, thus increasing your score.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We highly encourage you to do a quick spell check of your joke before submitting it. You can easily do this by copying and pasting the joke into Microsoft Word or some other program that can spell check the text from your joke. Also, you can use Dictionary.com to look up difficult words and how to spell them. Jokes with numerous spelling errors reduce their enjoyability and get lower scores than jokes that are error free.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Using proper punctuation, grammar, and spacing is highly recommended because it makes your jokes readable and understandable. If people are having a hard time understanding your jokes, they will be rated poorly and your score will suffer because of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please properly capitalize the title of the joke and each sentence within the joke. Proper names should also be capitalized.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please choose and acceptable rating for the joke(G=for all ages; PG=mild PG-13=really violent R=Explicit) before you submit it. People of different ages and preferences read different jokes on this website. If you give a G rating to a dirty joke, some users may get upset and rank your joke poorly. For more information, please read our FAQ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Try to refrain from referring to this website or the users of this website in the jokes you post on Wocka. This is mainly because most of the people who read the jokes might not understand the reference to a particular person and they will rate the joke poorly because they do not understand it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please do not submit jokes that are copyrighted by someone else. Or ask for permission from the author before you use copyrighted jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To add a joke to this list: Click the "Add to My Favorites" link when you are viewing a joke. To get rid of one of your favorite jokes: Go to your favorite jokes page. Next to each joke there is a garbage can icon. Click on the icon to get rid of that joke from your favorite''s page.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This list shows all your Wocka Buddies. To add someone to this list: First, find your buddy and click on their name. This brings up their profile. Then, in the Buddy list box it will say Add _______ to your buddy list. __ people have _______ listed as their buddy. ______ has ___ people has their buddies. Click on: Add _______ to your buddy list.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m really too tired and unable to do my home work, the son protested to his father. "Now my son, hard work has never killed any one yet, at least not at your age." "Yes, but I don''t want to run the risk of being the first!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Tex Tex who? Tex two to tango.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they call it "drug abuse" when the person "abusing the drugs" then ends up with half of his brain being rendered useless?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Right now I''m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I''ve forgotten this before. I got a new shadow. I had to get rid of the other one . . . It wasn''t doing what I was doing. I was in the grocery store. I saw a sign that said, "pet supplies." So I did. One time I went to a drive-in in a taxi cab. The movie cost me $95. I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren''t included, so I had to buy them again. I''m writing an unauthorized autobiography. I was once arrested for walking in someone else''s sleep. My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It''s in the apartment somewhere.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect. If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happen if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. There''s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. I didn''t get a toy train like the other kids. I got a toy subway instead. You couldn''t see anything, but every now and then you''d hear this rumbling noise go by. I used to own an ant farm but had to give it up. I couldn''t find tractors small enough to fit it. I saw a man with a wooden leg, and a real foot. I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to be a bartender at the Betty Ford Clinic. I bought a house, on a one-way dead-end road. I don''t know how I got there. I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I''m gone. I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I''m the only one moving. I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn''t have to go so fast. I had to stop driving my car for a while... The tires got dizzy. My neighbour has a circular driveway... He can''t get out. I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn''t park anywhere near the place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat she wanted to go shopping for a new belt so she reached into the sky, then pulled off one of Saturn''s rings and said, "Yep! Perfect fit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I fly, I go Air Bizarre. It''s a good airline. You buy a one-way round trip ticket. You leave any Monday and they bring you back the previous Friday... That way you still have the weekend. If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back? I broke a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. If the pen is mightier than the sword, in a duel I''ll let you have the pen! I was cleaning out my closet and I found a swim suit that I had made out of sponges. I remember one time when I wore it. When I got out of the swimming pool nobody could go swimming until I came back. The other day, when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree. It doesn''t matter what temperature the room is; it''s always room temperature. I have a very rare photograph. It shows Houdini locking his keys in his car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A male teen walks up to his uncle. "Where''s Aunt Rhodie?" said the teen. "In the living room," said his uncle. The teen walks to the door. "I wouldnt go in there if I were you," said the uncle, "they''re talking about female things." The male teen walks in anyway - (a moment in the hall passes) - the teen comes out all grossed out. "What''s wrong?" said the uncle. "I thought you meant SHOES!" said the teen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever heard of the Gay Mafia? No? If you don''t pay up, they come round your house, and criticize your curtains!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English teacher wrote this phrase on the board and asked her students to properly punctuate it: "Woman without her man is nothing." MEN WROTE: Woman, without her man, is nothing. WOMEN WROTE: Woman! Without her, man is nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here are some favorite sayings from people all over the world. Doctor: Oops. Secretary: I''m pregnant! Travel Agent: I know what you did last summer... Michael Jackson: I didn''t do it! Bill Clinton: I didn''t do it! Oh wait...Yes, I did. Computer Programmer: H0w d0 y0u w0rk th15 "Ch355" g4m3?? 1 N33D H3LP!!!111// Pilot: Are we there yet? Mad Scientist: I like Cows! Cell Phone Tester: Can you hear me now? Video Gamer: Can the line lag any further?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What to you call it when your pet jackrabbit dies? A: A bad "Hare" day', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is instructing her fourth grade class, and she''s telling them that the word of the day is ''contagious.'' She asks if anyone can use this word in a sentence, and several students raise their hands. "Carl," she says. Carl says, "My dad told me to stay away from kids with mumps, ''cause they''re contagious." "Very good," says the teacher. Then she picks Suzie, who says, "The atmosphere was contagious." The teacher says, "Excellent, Suzie!" Then she notices that little Johnny has his hand up at the back of the class. "Yes, Johnny?"she says. Johnny replies, "The other day, me and my dad''s a-sittin'' around, and we saw our blonde neighbor painting her fence. She had a tiny little model car paintbrush, and she was going in tiny little strokes up and down the fence, and my dad says to me, ''Jesus, it''s gonna take that cunt ages to finish that fence.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? There weren''t any cars coming!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a Japanese man who went to America for sightseeing. On the last day, he hailed a cab and told the driver to drive to the airport. During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi. Thereupon, the man leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled, "Honda, very fast! Made in Japan!" After a while, a Toyota sped past the taxi. Again, the Japanese man leaned out of the window and yelled, "Toyota, very fast! Made in Japan!" And then a Mitsubishi sped past the taxi. For the third time, the Japanese leaned out of the window and yelled, "Mitsubishi, very fast! Made in Japan!" The driver was a little angry, but he kept quiet, as this went on for quite a number of cars. Finally, the taxi came to the airport. The fare was $300. The Japanese man exclaimed, "Wah... so expensive!" The driver yelled back, "Meter, very fast! Made in Japan!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These four guys were walking down the street; a Saudi, a Russian, a North Korean, and a New Yorker. A reporter comes running up and says, "Excuse me, what is your opinion about the meat shortage?" The Saudi says, "What''s ''shortage''?" The Russian says, "What''s ''meat''?" The North Korean says, "What''s ''opinion''?" The New Yorker, says, "''Excuse me''? What''s ''excuse me''?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('. When young Jose, newly arrived in the United States, made his first trip to Yankee Stadium, there were no tickets left for sale. Touched by his disappointment, a friendly ticket salesman found him a perch near the American flag. Later, Jose wrote home enthusiastically about his experience. "And the Americans, they are so friendly!" he concluded. "Before the game started, they all stood up and looked at me and sang, ''Jose, can you see?''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Martin had just received his brand new driver''s license. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them for a ride for the first time. Dad immediately heads for the back seat, directly behind the newly minted driver. "I''ll bet you''re back there to get a change of scenery after all those months of sitting in the front passenger seat teaching me how to drive," says the beaming boy to his father. "Nope," comes dad''s reply, "I''m gonna sit here and kick the back of your seat as you drive, just like you''ve been doing to me all these years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there? *silence*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black priest? Holy Shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With all the new technology regarding fertility, an 88-year-old woman was able to give birth to a baby recently. When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, various relatives came to visit. "May we see the new baby?" one of them asked. "Not yet," said the mother. "I''ll make coffee and we can visit for a while first." Another half hour passed before another relative asked, "May we see the new baby now?" "No, not yet," said the mother. A while later and again the guests asked, "May we see the baby now?" "No, not yet," replied the mother. Growing impatient, they asked, "Well, when can we see the baby?" "When she cries!" she told them. "When she cries?" they gasped. "Why do we have to wait until she cries?" "Because, I forgot where I put her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER: How old were you on your last birthday? STUDENT: Seven. TEACHER: How old will you be on your next birthday? STUDENT: Nine. TEACHER: That''s impossible. STUDENT: No it isn''t, teacher. I''m eight today. ********************************************************** TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America. GEORGE: Here it is! TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? CLASS: George!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This young fellow was about to be married and was asking his grandfather about sex. He asked how often you should have it. His grandfather told him, "When you first get married, you want it all the time, and maybe you''ll do it several times a day. Later on, sex tapers off and you have it once a week or so. Then, as you get older, you have sex maybe once a month. When you get really old,you are lucky to have it once a year, like maybe on your anniversary." The young fellow then asks his grandfather, "Well, how about you and Grandma now?" His grandfather replied,"Oh, we just have oral sex now." "What''s oral sex?" the young fellow asked. "Well," Grandpa said, "she goes to bed in her bedroom and I go to bed in my bedroom. She yells,''Screw You!'' and I holler back,''Screw You too!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Indian chief is driving his Cadillac somewhere in Nevada when his car breaks down. He examines it and finds that a technician must be called, but the chief has only $4 and no credit card. So he gathers some wood, makes a fire and signals his tribe with its smoke: "Hey, send somebody to my location with $500!" The tribe accepts this signal, but to make sure of its meaning, signals back - once again, with smoke: "OK, chief, but why so much?" At this moment a ground test of nuclear bomb is held on the test field nearby. A huge mushroom-like cloud of smoke rises into the sky. The tribe signals: "Ok, Ok, chief, we just wondered, no need to get mad!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are headlines that *might* have appeared in papers in the aftermath of Little Bighorn - Variety: "Custer Closes Out of Town" Pravda: "Big Red Victory" Sports Illustrated: "Indians Win Series" Women''s Wear Daily: "Feathers Make Comeback" Reader''s Digest: "Sitting Bull Reveals New Cure for Dandruff" The Washington Post: "Custer Loses Rural Vote"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An F-111 was flying escort with a B-52 and generally making a nuisance of himself by flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber. The message for the B-52 crew was, "Anything you can do, I can do better." Not to be outdone, the bomber pilot announced that he would rise to the challenge. The B-52, however, continued its flight, straight and level. Perplexed, the fighter pilot asked, "I''m waiting, what are you going to do?" "We just shut down two engines."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new soldier was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear - no car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield. A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back. The sentry said, "Halt, who goes there?" The chauffeur, a corporal, says, "General Wheeler." "I''m sorry, I can''t let you through. You''ve got to have a sticker on the windshield." The general said, "Drive on!" The sentry said, "Hold it! You really can''t come through. I have orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker." The general repeated, "I''m telling you, son, drive on!" The sentry walked up to the rear window and said, "General, I''m new at this. Do I shoot you or the driver?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A soldier had lost his bayonet and whittled one from wood so he could stand inspection. He was hoping not to be discovered until the regiment had gone into battle where he could pick up one from a dead soldier. At an inspection, an officer asked to see his bayonet. The soldier stated, "Sir, I promised my father I would never unsheathe my bayonet unless I intended to kill with it." The officer insisted he hand over the bayonet. Taking it out, the soldier looked skyward and declared, "May the Lord change this bayonet to wood for breaking my vow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blond labourers looking for work arrive at a railway station, and ask for one-way tickets. The ticket-seller looks through his schedule, but can''t find the place the blonds are seeking. "But you must be able to find it," says one. "We read in the papers that there are thousands of jobs in Jeopardy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What happens when you pour boiling water on a bunny? A: A hot cross-buniken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A parachute used once, but has never been open!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Eileen. Eileen who? Eileen on the door until you open it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s cooking so bad, she''s got a toothbrush next to her plate instead of a knife!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s mum was sitting in front of computer while Johnny was making sandwiches. She said to Johhny, "You''re the best sandwich maker ever," and Johnny says "No mum, you''re just lazy." hahahahahahahahahahaha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the boy buy a new bum? Coz his had a crack in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mum told me that picking my nose was disgusting, and from now on, I had to pick it myself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was talking to my sister''s boyfriend one day and I asked him if prettyful was a word. He said, "Well, I use it a lot. Whenever I''ve just eaten and someone asks me if I''m hungry, I say ''I''m pretty full."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there? can''t catch. can''t catch who? me, you can''t catch me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This hillbilly is traveling across Texas when a state policeman pulls him over. "You got any I.D.?" the patrolman asked. "''Bout what?" the hillbilly replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A deputy police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The "disturbance" turned out to be well over six feet tall and weighed almost 300 pounds. What''s more, he boasted that he could whip the deputy and Muhammad Ali too. Said the policeman, "I''ll bet that you''re also an escape artist - probably better than Houdini." The giant nodded. "If I had some chains," the deputy continued, "you could show us how strong you really are. But all I''ve got is a set of handcuffs. Why don''t you see just how quickly you can break out of them?" Once in the cuffs, the man puffed, pulled and jerked for four minutes. "I can''t get out of these," the giant growled. "Are you sure?" the deputy asked. The fellow tried again. "Nope," he replied. "I can''t do it." "In that case," said the deputy, "you''re under arrest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man being mugged by two thugs put up a tremendous fight! Finally, the thugs subdued him and took his wallet. Upon finding only two dollars in the wallet, the surprised thug said "Why did you put up such a fight?" To which the man replied, "I was afraid that you would find the $200 hidden in my shoe!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: "How''s your history paper coming?" Woman: "Well, my history professor suggested that I use the Internet for research, and it''s been very helpful." Man: "Really?" Woman: "Yes! I''ve already located 17 people who sell them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at a yard sale one day and saw a box marked "Electronic cat and dog caller -- guaranteed to work." I looked inside and was amused to see an electric can opener.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police detective was investigating a homicide. As he questioned the on-scene officer, he learned the body was that of a young woman. The body was found with a bowl over her head and a spoon stuck in her back. The on-scene officer asked what the detective thought had happened to the woman. The detective responded, "I think it''s obvious. A cereal killer got her!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock! Who''s there? Maida. Maida who? Maida force be with you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The theory of evolution was greatly objected to because it made man think. Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillers. The dodo is a bird that is almost decent by now. To remove air from a flask, fill it with water, tip the water out, and put the cork in quick before the air can get back in. The process of turning steam back into water again is called conversation. A magnet is something you find crawling all over a dead cat. The Earth makes one resolution every 24 hours. The cuckoo bird does not lay his own eggs. To collect fumes of sulfur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube. Parallel lines never meet, unless you bend one or both of them. Algebraical symbols are used when you do not know what you are talking about. Geometry teaches us to bisex angles. A circle is a line which meets its other end without ending. The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you noticed since most people have a camcorder these days there are not as many people talking about seeing UFOs as there use to be?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Abbott. Abbott who? Abbott time you answered the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Ten percent of all car thieves are left-handed. 2. All Polar Bears are left-handed. 3. If your car is stolen, there''s a 10 percent chance it was taken by a Polar Bear. 1. 39 percent of unemployed men wear spectacles. 2. 80 percent of employed men wear spectacles. 3. Work stuffs up your eyesight. 1. A total of 4000 cans are opened around the world every second. 2. Ten babies are conceived around the world every second. 3. Each time you open a can, you stand a 1 in 400 chance of becoming pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aig - What a hen lays. Aints - He''s got aints in his paints. Paints - What cha put on your laigs of a morning. Arn - Ma''s tard of arnin. Bag - He bagged her to marry him. Bobbed - A bobbed wire fence. Bresh - He had a bresh with the law, and the law won. Bub - the light bub burned out. Cheer - What you set in. Crick - A small stream. Clum - He sure clum that tree fastern any ''coon. Chiny - country over in Asia. Chuch duds - Sunday go-to-meetin clothes. Core - He got hisself a new Ford core. Cyow - Animal on Farm. Deppity - He helps out the shurf.. Dribbed - He dribbed milk on his shirt. Dainz - Satidy night social. Ellum - A graceful tree. Fanger - What you put your rang on. Faince - Whats round the hawg lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Far - What get the brandin arn hot. Furred - He got furred from his job. Flar - A rose is a purdy flar. Frash - Them aigs ain''t frash. Furiners - All non-''bamans. Further - Hits ten miles further to town. Grain - She was grain with envy. Hail - Where bad folks go. Hep - Poor George, he can''t hep it, he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Hern - It aint hern, it''s his''n. Hilbilly - People in the next county. Hollar What''s between the hills. Hard - Got a brend new hard. Tar - His core blew a tar. Laymun - A sour fruit. Laig - Most folks have two of them. Lather - What you climb up. Liberry - Where you go to check out books for larnin. Mailk - what you get from cyows. Mere - What you see yourself in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Minners - Live bait. Misrus - Married woman. Nar - Opposite of wide. Nayk - Your head sets on it. Nup No. Orrel - Them hinges need orrel. Ormy - What the sojers go in. Pank - A light red color. Parch - Sit out on the parch and watch the grass grow. Petition - What separate the rooms. Poke - A paper bag or sack. Pokey - What the shurf and deppity puts crimnals in. Salit - A green vegetable. Puppet - What the preacher is in. Purdy - She is purdy as a pitcher. Purt near - Almost; he purt near caught that greased pig. Rang - You wear it on your fanger. Rut - That there tree sure has long ruts. Rah cheer - I was born rah cheer in town.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rainch - A big cow farm. Rat - Do it rat now! Rench - Rench the soap yourself. Roont - She plum roont her shoes. Salary - A stringy vegetable. Soardeens - Small canned fish. Shar - A light rain. Gully Worsher - A medium heavy rain. Toad strangler - A heavy rain Sody. Pop - A soft drink. Sprang - Water out''n the ground. Shurf - The Shurf put Clem in jail. Storch - This here aprn has too much storch in it. Skeered - that plumb skeered me to death. Thanks - He shore thanks he''s smart. Tho - Tho me the ball. Thoat - I shore got a sore thoat. War - A bobbed war fance. Worsh - Go worsh your face. Warter - What you worsh your face in. Yurp - A continent overseas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For a REAL sponge cake, BORROW all the ingredients. Diplomacy - the art of letting someone have your way. A seminar on time travel will be held two weeks ago. Give and you might receive; take and be sure. I can''t remember the last time I forgot something. I''m not schizophrenic, and neither am I. In an atomic attack, all men will be cremated equal. It''s bad luck to be superstitious. I''ve been meaning to start procrastinating for some time now. Logic the art of being wrong, with confidence. Old age isn''t so bad, when you consider the alternative. Shin a device for finding furniture in the dark. "Very funny, Scotty, now beam down my clothes." No matter where you go, there you are. What are occasional tables the rest of the time?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are my summer clothes. Summer paid for, summer not. How do you get down from an elephant? You don''t, you get down from a duck. Why couldn''t anyone play cards on the ark? Because Noah sat on the deck. Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other "You drive, I''ll man the guns." The Russians are very jealous of the American''s Stealth Bombers, so they''ve decided to build their own. It''ll be called the Optical Illyushin. One good turn... gets all the blankets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I took lessons in bicycle riding, but I could only afford half of them. Now I can ride a unicycle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God was in Heaven and was getting particularly bored. "Oh what can I do?" he exclaimed. St. Peter came up to him and suggested he take a vacation. "That''s a great idea, but where should I go?" asked God. "How about the moon?" suggested St. Peter. "Well, I could, but there''s no gravity on the moon," stated God "Then how about the Earth?" When St. Peter said this God''s eyes widened and he said, "Are you mad? I went there 2000 years ago, met a nice Jewish girl and they''re still talking about it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mosquitos consider most people as food, but grandma''s an open bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ll tell ya later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was staying over at a farmer''s house for the night. However, the farmer warned: "My daughter is sleeping in the room next door. I''m going to put a wall of eggs around her bed to make sure that you don''t go near her, understand?" The man nodded weakly, for she saw the daughter and noticed she was very beautiful. That night, the man crept into the daughter''s room, and sure enough, there was a wall of eggs surrounding her bed. Alas, the daughter''s beauty was too much for the man, and he pushed through the wall of eggs and made love to her. Once they were finished, the man took out a mop and cleaned the mess up. He then used super glue to glue the eggs back together and restack them. He then went back to his room. The next day, the farmer inspected the wall of eggs. He congratulated the man and celebrated with an egg feast. But when he took an egg off the wall and cracked it open, nothing came out. The farmer groaned, "Not again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mate''s a maniakleptic he walks into shops backwards and leaves things. Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play? "It is better to have loved a short man, than never to have loved a tall." If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog horns out of? If you jog backwards, will you gain weight? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? We painted our floor with luminous paint. So now the florescent what it used to be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is proven that the celebration of birthdays is healthy. Statistics show that those people who celebrate the most birthdays become the oldest. - S. den Hartog, Ph D. Thesis Universtity of Groningen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s black and white and makes a lot of noise? A zebra with a drum.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had a tick before? asked Mel. "No, I''ve only ever had crosses," replied Sally.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Vincent, not to be presumptuous, but your short story is truly fantastic. Did you really write it? Vincent: Yes, I wrote, while my mother dictated...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shakespeare walks into a bar and the bartender shouts at him, "You can''t come in here, you''re Bard!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do doughnut shops need security systems?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, I gave her a piggyback ride and I got scoliosis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear, a lion and a chicken were having a discussion as to which one of them scares humans the most. "I only have to growl," said the bear, "and people start to get a bit nervous." The lion said, "I just have to roar and people run away." "That''s nothing," replied the chicken. "I only have to sneeze and the whole world panics."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bees in their hive on a lovely summer day, and one says to the other, "''Swarm in here, isn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call Santa when he''s been to the beach? Sandy Claus!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? He. He who? He who must not be named, so don''t say it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student on a class trip to the natural-history museum asks the guard, "Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?" The guard tells him, "Three-million-four years and six months old." The student says. "How do you know that so precisely?" The guard says, "Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the bald man say when he was given a comb for his birthday? "Oh, thank you! I''ll never part with it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Charles the First walked and talked half an hour after his head was cut off. Make sense? It should be- "Charles the First walked and talked. Half an hour after, his head was cut off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everybody knows about the kangaroo, the tall marsupial that lives in Australia, but when settlers first went there, they were amazed and had never seen anything like them. They asked an aborigine what the animals were called. He replied, "Kangaroo," so that is what the settlers called them. Little did they know, kangaroo is an aboriginal phrase meaning, "I don''t understand your question."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irish guy was digging a hole in his front lawn, when his neighbour walks by and says, "Hey, Patrick, what are you doing?" "Digging a hole," said Patrick. "What''s wrong with the hole next to it?" said his neighbour. "That one wasn''t deep enough," said Patrick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Steve is playing with his 3 friends at his tree in the back garden, and his mum comes out and shouts, "If all four of you fall out of that tree and break both legs, then don''t come running to me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma so fat that when I swerved around her in my car, I ran out of petrol!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so stupid, you traded your car in for petrol!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re as bright as a broken lightbulb!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re as funny as a ripped-up joke book!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('you''re as smart as a broken calculator!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first you don''t suceed...lower your standards!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was trying to impress his mum on his new bike. He was going down the path and said to his mum, "Look, mum, no feet!" He then put his feet back on the bike and removed his hands from the handlebars. He then shouted, "Look, mum, no hands!" He then lost control of the bike and collided with a tree. His mum ran up to his side, whereas her son said, "Look, mum, no teeth."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Chuck Norris jumps in a pool he dosent get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris''d. Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a horse. It''s decendants are know as giraffes. Chuck Norris doesn''t need oxygen, oxygen needs Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris doesn''t pay off debt, debt pays off Chuck Norris.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Becky prepared a pasta dish for a dinner party she was giving. In her haste, however, she forgot to refrigerate the spaghetti sauce, and it sat on the counter all day. She was worried about spoilage, but it was too late to cook up another batch. She called the local Poison Control Center and voiced her concern. They advised Becky to boil the sauce again. That night, the phone rang during dinner, and one of the guests volunteered to answer it. Becky''s face dropped as the guest called out, "It''s the Poison Control Center. They want to know how the spaghetti sauce turned out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandpa was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how athletic and well-preserved he appeared. "Gentlemen, I will tell you the secret of my success," he cackled. "I have been in the open air day after day for some 75 years now." The celebrants were impressed and asked how he managed to keep up his rigorous fitness regime. "Well, you see my wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding night, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had a fight, the one who was proved wrong would go outside and take a walk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Dot. Dot who? Dots for me to know, and you to find out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To get your Star Wars name, do the following: 1) Start with the 1st 3 letters of your last name 2) Add the first two letters of your first name 3) Add the first two letters of your mother''s maiden name 4) Add the first two letters of the city in which you were born 5) Then, if you want, you can remove one letter to make it sound cool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The can was invented quite a while before the can opener.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call the planters guy beating up fruit spread? Peanut battering jelly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guy goes to see his doctor - "Doctor, please help me, I''ve got kleptomania bad!" "OK, take these pills, one a day, but if they''ve not worked in a month, could you get me an LCD telly?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In "The Greatest Story Ever Told", John Wayne played a centurion at the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. One of his lines was, "Truly he is the Son of God!" The director felt John W. wasn''t putting enough into it, and asked him to deliver the line again, but with a little more emphasis - "to put some awe into it". "OK," says John, "Awww - truly he is the Son of God!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honey, the car won''t start, but I know what the problem is, Kathy said. Chuck asked her what it was, and she told him there was water in the carburettor. Chuck thought for a moment, then said, "You know, I don''t mean to be offensive, but you don''t know the carburetor from the accelerator." "No, there''s definitely water in the carburettor," Kathy insisted. "OK honey, that''s fine, I''ll just go take a look. Where is it?" "In the lake!" she said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Charlie: "My wife has the worst memory ever." Tom: "She forgets everything, huh?" Charlie: "No, she REMEMBERS everything!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so stupid she took wood to the movie SAW!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We all know that a good old fashioned zombie says "Braaaaiiiiins!" But what would these zombies say? A Vegan Zombie - "Graaaaaiiiiins!" A 1940''s Mobster Zombie - "Daaaaaaames!" A Michael Jordan Zombie - "Haaaaaayynes!" A Vampire Zombie - "Veeeeeeeiiiiins!" A Masochistic Zombie - "Paaaaaiiiiiins!" A Maid Zombie - "Staaaaaiiiins!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to the dentist and says, "How much to get these two teeth pulled?" "$80 a tooth," he replies. "For two minutes work! That''s crazy!" said the patient. "Trust me," said the dentist, "You don''t want me to do it any slower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This big-time rancher from Texas met a Missouri farmer on a business trip. The Texas rancher bragged, "I can get in my truck, drive all day, and never cross the boundary of my ranch!" "Yep," replied the little Missouri farmer, "I had a truck like that once, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She left him because he had a will of his own. And it wasn''t made out to her!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A detective was questioning a burglary suspect. "Where were you between five and six?" he asked. "In kindergarten!" he replied', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy called to his mother from the yard, "Mom, would you rather me fall out of a tree and break my arm or just tear a hole in my Sunday slacks?" "Well," she replied, "I guess I''d pray that you just ripped your pants." The kid yells back, "Your prayers have been answered!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sucessful business man became disenchanted with the stress of the fast life in the big city and decides to chuck it all. He takes his savings and purchases a large ranch in the middle of nowhere in Montana. After a couple of months of enjoying the solitude, he hears the drumming of hoofbeats outside his cabin. Grabbing his rifle he challenges the man riding up on the horse. "Hold it, neighbor," the man says, "I''m your neighbor, I have a ranch only six miles from here, and I want to invite you to a Welcome Party I''m throwing for you next Saturday. There''s going to be music, dancing, hugging, kissing, drinking, fighting.... We''ll have a great time." Not wanting to be unneighborly the new rancher lowers the rifle and asks, "How should I dress?" "Aw, don''t matter," replied the neighbor, "Only gonna be the two of us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock! Who''s There? Radio. Radio Who? Radio not, here I come!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One chicken says to the other, "For heaven''s sake, don''t cross the road! We''ll never hear the end of it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, when she turns around another year has passed already!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she needs mapquest to find her butt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Haf. Haf who. Haf you ever opened the door because I''m tired of waiting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma smells so bad the skunk gave her his stripe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? I doughnut want to know if you''re sick!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George Carlin said it best about Martha Stewart: "Boy, I feel a lot safer now that she''s behind bars. O. J. Simpson and Kobe Bryant are still walking around; Osama Bin Laden too, but they take the ONE woman in America willing to cook, clean, and work in the yard, and they haul her fanny off to jail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Frenchman, the German, and the Israeli were standing around in the cafe in Tel Aviv, comparing their lifestyles. "When I go to work," said the Frenchman, "I drive my Renault. On weekends I drive my $30,000 Peugeot. And when I travel abroad, I always drive a $50,000 Citroen." "Bah,"said the German, "I drive a Volkswagen to work. But on weekends I drive a $50,000 BMW, and when I go abroad, I always take my customized $60,000 Mercedes." "Very impressive," the Israeli admitted. "As for me, I take the bus to work, and on Sundays I motor around in my little Ford. But when I go abroad, I drive a $250,000 tank.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ducking into confession with a turkey in his arms, the man said, "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. I stole this turkey to feed my family. Would you take it and assuage my guilt?" "Certainly not," said the priest. "As penance, you must return it to the one from whom you stole it." "I-I tried," the man sobbed, "but he refused. Oh, Father, what should I do?" "If what you say is true, then it is all right for you to keep it for your family." Thanking the priest, the man hurried off. When confession was over, the priest returned to his residence. When he walked into the kitchen, he found that someone had stolen his Thanksgiving turkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After she was finished with Cinderella, the fairy godmother paid a visit on another poor young girl, Minuetta. Extremely flat-chested, the woman is convinced that her life would improve if only she had large breasts. "All right," the fairy godmother said. "How about we fix it so that every time a man says ''pardon'' to you, your breasts grow a bit." Delighted with the arrangement, Minuetta goes to the market next day. Bumping into the woodcutter, she''s delighted when he tips his hat, says, "I beg your pardon," and her breasts grow nearly an inch. Later, when a coachmean accidentally splashes mud on her, he stops and says, "Pardon me." Her breasts grow again. Smiling radiantly when she reaches the market, she goes to the vegetable stand and asks the Arab merchant for some bread. While he''s handing it to her, he accidentally knocks a tub of jam on her dress. "Oh dear," he bows and scrapes, "a thousand pardons!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock. Who''s there? Esther. Esther who? The Esther Bunny. Knock, knock. Who''s there? Stella. Stella who? Stella nother Esther Bunny. Knock, knock. Who''s there? Samoa. Samoa who? Samoa Esther Bunnies. Knock, knock. Who''s there? Consumption. Consumption who? Consumption be done about all these Esther Bunnies? Knock, knock. Who''s there? Esther. Esther who? Esther anyone else as sick of this joke as I am?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many mathematicians does it take to replace a lightbulb? Pi. 3 screw exactly a radius''s length, and the last about-one-seventh screws it in all the way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day St. Peter visited Hell to make certain that the sinners were being adequately punished. During his tour he noticed that Hitler was standing in feces up to his chin. Surprisingly, the Fuhrer was smiling. "I don''t understand," sasid St. Peter. "How can you smile when you''ll be spending all of eternity in excrement?" Hitler replied, "I''m smiling because I''m standing on Mussolini''s shoulders."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blind man who went bungee jumping?? V V V V V V V V V V V V V V He loved it, but it scared the heck out of his dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Virginity is like a balloon. One prick and it''s gone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whenever I have to go up in a building, I choose the elevator over the escalator because one time i was on an escalator and I tripped... So i was falling for an hour and a half.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What type of storage units do underwater computers use? A: Trilo-bytes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man comes to dinner at a new friend''s house. While they eat, the new friend''s small son keeps staring at the guest. Finally, the guest says, ''Why are you staring at me like that, young fellow?'' The kid says, ''Daddy told me you were a self-made man.'' ''I am.'' ''Well, why did you make yourself like that?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Presidents on a sinking ship! Ford says: "What do we do?" Bush says: "Man the lifeboats!" Reagan says: "What lifeboats?" Carter says: "Women first!" Nixon says: "Screw the women!" Clinton says: "You think we have time?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What is a Kentucky Virgin? Answer: A really ugly seven year old girl who can run faster than her older brother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All you see in the sports media nowadays is the fact that athletes are taking steriods and other performance enhanceing drugs to become stronger and faster. So instead of going out and buying a new car I put some steriods in the gas tank.... I wonder if I will get the same result?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An airplane takes off from the airport. The Captain is Jewish and the First Officer is Chinese. It''s the first time they''ve flown together and it''s obvious, by the silence, that they don''t get along. After thirty minutes, the Jewish Captain mutters: "I don''t like Chinese." The First Officer replies: "Oooooh, no like Chinese? Why dat?" "Your people bombed Pearl Harbor. That''s why I don''t like Chinese." "Nooooo, noooo, Chinese not bomb Peahl Hahbah. That Japanese, not Chinese." "Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese... it doesn''t matter, you''re all alike." Another thirty minutes of silence. Finally, the First Officer says: "No like Jew." "Why not? Why don''t you like Jews?" "Jews sink Titanic." "The Jews didn''t sink the Titanic, it was an iceberg." "Iceberg, Goldberg, Rosenberg, Spielberg; no mattah ... all da same." P.S. Chinese Juice - Chinese Jews. Geddit? There''s a joke about it on here somewhere!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two people are discussing whether the state of Hawaii is pronounced ''Havaii'' or ''Hawaii''. So they stood there arguing and arguing, until they decided to ask a person that was walking by. They asked the gentleman: "Excuse me sir, is Hawaii pronounced ''Havaii'' or ''Hawaii''?" The gentleman said, "Havaii." So they looked at each other, and as the gentleman was leaving, one of the two said to him, "Thank you." The gentleman replied, "You''re velcome!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the copilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system. "Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed when a lump of nickel and iron, roughly 150 feet in diameter and weighing 300,000 tons, struck the earth at about 40,000 miles an hour, scattering white-hot debris for miles in every direction. The hole measures nearly a mile across and is 570 feet deep." From the cabin, a passenger was heard to exclaim, "Wow! It just missed the highway!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In front of a delicatessen, an art connoisseur noticed a mangy little kitten lapping up milk from a saucer. The saucer, he realized with a start, was a rare and precious piece of pottery. He strolled into the store and offered two dollars for the cat. "It''s not for sale," said the proprietor. "Look," said the collector, "that cat is dirty and undesirable, but I''m eccentric. I like cats that way. I''ll raise my offer to ten dollars." "It''s a deal," said the proprietor, and pocketed the ten. "For that sum I''m sure you won''t mind throwing in the saucer," said the connoisseur. "The kitten seems so happy drinking from it." "Nothing doing," said the proprietor firmly. "That''s my lucky saucer. From that saucer, so far this week I''ve sold 34 cats."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An exhausted looking blond dragged himself in to the doctor''s office. "Doctor, there are dogs all over my neighborhood. They bark all day and all night, and I can''t get a wink of sleep." "I have good news for you," the doctor answered, rummaging through a drawer full of sample medications. "Here are some new sleeping pills that work like a dream. A few of these and your trouble will be over." "Great," the blond answered, "I''ll try anything. Let''s give it a shot." A few weeks later the blond returned, looking worse than ever. "Doc, your plan is no good. I''m more tired than before!" "I don''t understand how that could be," said the doctor, shaking his head. "Those are the strongest pills on the market!" "That may be true," answered the blond wearily, "but I''m still up all night chasing those dogs and when I finally catch one it''s hard getting him to swallow the pill!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, a man happened upon a magical lamp. He rubbed it and a genie came out. "Are you going to give me three wishes?" the man asked. "No," said the genie. "I am a rare and mystical question genie. I am way more honorable than a simple wish genie! You may ask me three questions." The man thought for a while about what he wanted to ask. This was a once in a lifetime opportunity to unlock the secrets of the world. Finally, he said, "Okay, here''s what I want to know: What is the cure for the common cold? How can perpetual motion be created? And where can a fuel source, that is clean and reusable and will replace all the others, be found?" The genie nodded and walked off. Puzzled, the man came after him. "Hey," he said somewhat angrily, "aren''t you going to answer my questions?" The genie stopped and looked at him with an incredulous expression; "Who the hell do you think I am? A question AND answer genie?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Catherine, a RN, was unhappy with her job, so she submitted her resignation. She was sure she''d have no trouble finding a new position, because of the nursing shortage in her area. She e-mailed cover letters to dozens of potential employers and attached her resume to each one. Two weeks later, Catherine was dismayed and bewildered that she had not received even one request for an interview. Finally she received a message from a prospective employer that explained the reason she hadn''t heard from anyone else. It read: "Your resume was not attached as stated. I do, however, want to thank you for the vegetable lasagna recipe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many men does it take to find anything? Zero. They have to ask a woman 1st and then after she tells them exactly where it is for the umpteenth time & they still can''t find it..... The now exasperated woman goes & gets it for them in the exact place she has told them it was. Duh!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('George W. Bush.... that''s it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you ever notice that a lot of people will do just about anything to get attention? Like putting jokes up on a website! P.S I love Wocka.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 100 year old man sits on the edge of his bed on the day of his 100th birthday. He looks down at his feet and says "well feet, you''re 100 years old today!" He then looks at his hands and says, "well hands, you are 100 years old today." He goes into the bathroom, looks in the mirror, and says, "well face, you are 100 years old today." He then goes over to the toilet to relieve himself, and looks down at his penis and says, "Well old buddy, if you would have made it, you would have been 100 years old today!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gummer: Is defined as receiving oral sex from a woman who has no teeth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde went to see her doctor for her annual checkup so the doctor gave her the once over. At the end of the checkup he shone a light in her ear to have a look; amazed, he shook his head and walked away. See below what the doctor had seen. A big sign SPACE FOR RENT.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the morning after pill for guys? It changes his blood type.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do women with no legs leave behind when they cross a linoleum floor? Snail Tracks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever seen Moth Balls? You have!!! How did you get their teeny, tiny and poor little legs apart? Ya fiend!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a walrus & tupperware have in common? They both like a "tight" SEAL!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is Jewish beer called? He Brew!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny is approached by the lifeguard at the public swimming pool. "You''re not allowed to pee in the pool," says the lifeguard. "I''m going to report you." "But everyone pees in the pool," whined Little Johnny. "Maybe," answered the lifeguard, "but not from the diving board!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so fat when jumps up in the air she gets stuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a religious woman and a supposedly regular woman in a bathtub? One has HOPE in her soul.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Made up this joke myself.. Please laugh. When I go all the way blind (2/3 the way there now); my Mommie''s gonna give me a new kitty and tell me that I can only play with it outside & in the street. The Kittie''s name is Pe-Pe-La-Pugh. She tell''s me it''s black & white. Love that kitty. Rhhhhhhhhh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Junk- something you keep for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What can you break without saying its'' name? Silence...Shhh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mystery All my life has been a mystery You and I were never ever meant to be Thats why I call my love for you... a mystery. Different country You and I have always lived in different countries And I know that airline tickets don''t grow on a tree So what kept us apart is plain for me to see That part at least, is not really much of a mystery. Estuary I live on a houseboat on an estuary Which is handy for my work with the port authority But I''m sure you would have found it Insanit-ery Insanit-ery Headed me I am foolish to ignore the possibilty That if we actually met, you might have a taken a really violent dislike of me But thats not the only problem I can see Dead since 1993 You''ve been dead now, wait a minute, let me see, 14 years come next Janu-a-ry As a human beign you are history So why do I still long for you Why is my love so strong for you Why did I write this song for you Well, I guess it''s just a mystery Mystery', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mamma is soooo ugo... When you look in the mirror you die of fright, as you look just like her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and says, "Give me a beer before problems start!" Again, the man orders a beer again saying, "Give me a beer before problems start!" The bartender looks confused. This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man, "When are you going to pay for these beers?" The man answers, "Ah, now the problems start!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a few co-workers at the computer data centre stayed late and all started to feel hungry. They decided to order in food by phone, but their boss thought that, since they worked with computers, it would be more appropriate to order by Internet. After they contacted a fast food chain''s web site and spent a long time registering as new customers for the delivery service, a message appeared on the screen: "Thank you for your business. You will be able to order food in three days."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy wrote this letter to his grandmother: Dear Grandmother, I''m sorry I forgot your birthday last week. It would serve me right if you forgot mine next Tuesday. With love, Mike', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What does a 1000 pound bird say?? A: SQUAWK!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What was Jesus when he was resurrected? A: A Born Again Christian', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you get a blonde with one arm out of a tree? A: Wave to her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the first day of school and this girl''s teacher asked her what her name was. She said "Texas." The teacher said, "Haha, no really, what''s your name?" and the girl said, "Texas," so the teacher said, "Go to the principal''s office." The principal said, "What''s your name?" She replied, "Texas." He said, "Funny, what''s your name?" and she said, "Texas," so he sent her home. As Texas was walking home, a guy stopped her and said, "What''s your name?" She said, "Texas." He said, "That''s funny. No, really, what''s your name?" She said, "Texas." He said, "I will stab you with my mother''s butcher knife if you don''t tell me what your real name is," and she said, "IT''S TEXAS!" so he stabbed her. When he got home, his mother asked, "Where''s my butcher knife?" and he sang "DEEP IN THE HEART OF TEXAS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few years ago the battery in my beat-up VW Beetle had died because I left the lights on overnight. I was in a hurry to get to work on time so I ran into the house to get my wife, a blonde, to give me a hand starting the car. I told her to get into our second car, a prehistoric oversized gas guzzler, and use it to push my car fast enough to start it. I pointed out that because the VW had an automatic transmission, it needed to be pushed at least 30mph for it to start. She said "fine!", hopped into her car and drove off. I sat there fuming and wondering what she could be doing. A minute passed by and when I saw her in the rear-view mirror coming at me at about 40 mph, and I suddenly realized that I should have been a bit clearer with my directions...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Needing some clothes cleaned in a hurry, a man searched this small Georgia town in which he was visiting until he found a sign which read: "Cleaning and Pressing, 24-Hour Service." After explaining his needs, he said, "I''ll be back for my suit tomorrow." "Won''t be ready til Saturday," replied the proprietor. "But I thought you had 24-hour service," the customer protested. "We do, son," the proprietor said reproachfully. "But we only work eight hours a day. Today''s Thursday - eight hours today, eight hours Friday, eight on Saturday. That''s 24-hour service."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob was talking to Ted, an old friend. Bob: My wife drives like lightning! Ted: She drives fast? Bob: No, She hits trees!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Who''s idea was it to put "s" in the word "Lisp"? 2. Trust in God, but keep your car locked. 3. They say that swimming is good for your figure. If so, what happened to whales?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) If it rings, put it on hold. 2) If it clanks, call the repairman. 3) If it whistles, ignore it. 4) If it''s a friend, take a break. 5) If it''s the boss, look busy. 6) If it talks, take notes. 7) If it''s handwritten, type it. 8) If it''s typed, copy it. 9) If it''s copied, file it. 10) If it''s Friday, forget it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please Don''t Hurt Me by I. Bruce Easily "Life Through the Eyes of a Drunk" by Al Coholic "Thirty yards to the outhouse" by Will E. Makeit (illustrated by Betty Wont) "The Proper Use of Sunscreens" by Justin Casey Burns "How To Cure Scratching" by Ivan Awfulich "Discount Alternatives" by Robin Stuff', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly woman lived on a small farm in Canada, just yards away from the North Dakota border. Their land had been the subject of a minor dispute between the United States and Canada for years. The widowed woman lived on the farm with her son and three grandchildren. One day, her son came into her room holding a letter. "I just got some news, Mom," he said. "The government has come to an agreement with the people in North Dakota. They''ve decided that our land is really part of the United States. We have the right to approve or disapprove of the agreement. What do you think?" "What do I think?" his mother said. "Sign it! Call them right now and tell them we accept! I don''t think I can stand another Canadian winter!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a blond teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they were appalled by his appearance: leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos and a pierced nose. Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. "Dear," said the mother diplomatically, "he doesn''t seem very nice." "Oh please, Mom," replied the daughter, "if he wasn''t nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Although cats are rather delicate creatures, and they are subject to a good many ailments, I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia. Dogs and cats instinctively know the exact moment their owners will wake up. Then they wake them 10 minutes sooner. Dogs shed, cats shred. No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does. I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am. People that hate cats will come back as dogs in their next life. We wonder why the dogs always drink out of our toilets, but look at it from their point of view: Why do humans keep peeing into their water bowls? Women and cats will do as they please... men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Outside of a dog, a book is probably man''s best friend. Inside of a dog, it''s too dark to read.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Save the whales, harpoon a fat chick!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a small town, an frightened man ran inside the local pub and shouted, "Does anyone here own a big black dog with a white collar?" But no one answered and he said, "Oh my God,I must have run over the Vicar!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 men sell their bodies to science, for an exsperiment on a new military weapon to scare enemy soldiers by turning them into the enemies idea of the most scary, repulsive idea possible temporarily. The first man has his wife looking at him, drinks the chemical, and turns into a half-fish half-octopus with fur. The second guy has his therapist looking at him, and turns into a giant bald hamster with a snake head. The third guy has his girlfriend looking at him, he drinks the chemical. Nothing happens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hubluza', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This story takes place in a very specific year. Somewhere in the future. A year after Bush leaves office. -------------------------------- Part 1. A Space mission Place: In a rocket in space. Notes: names such as Junior and Senior are just rankings on the shuttle. -------------------------------- Senior: WHAT ARE YOU DOING, JUNIOR? Junior: Getting a donut. Senior: Yeah, but look at which donut it is. Junior: Chocolate with colorful sprinkles. Senior: YEAH! ONLY SENIOR RANKINGS GET SPRINKLES! Junior: Yeah! Wadaya gonna do? Senior: DON''T MAKE ME HURT YOU! Piolot: Guys, we have a problem. Junior: What is it? Senior: Shut up, Junior, let a sopisticated Senior do this. What is the problem? Piolot: I see a comet coming for us. Senior: Sacrifice Junior. Medical: Leave him alone! Junior: Yeah! I have a name! Medical: I''m sorry, I never caught your name. Junior: For the seventh time it''s Wally!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Note: This joke only makes sense if you read Space Adventure Part I on this site. A complete set of the Adventures can be found in the FunnyStories Forum. ---------------------------------- I Wally will take it from here! Part 1. A Space Mission Point of View: Wally(Junior) Notes: I''ll tell the story. Anything in parenthesse is me talking to you, not what someone said. -------------------------------- Medical: Oh, sorry. Me: Whatever. Senior: HA HA the woman can''t remember!(Senior''s a meanie I mean Come On!) Me: SHUT UP! Pilot: Jake (that''s Senior''s name) it''s not her fault she can''t remember. She didn''t choose to be female*laughs*! Medical: Don''t make me hurt you! Jake: Settle down, baby! Medical: grrrr Pilot: Very funny WOMAN leave the important stuff to the men NURSE but I''ll see you in bed later BABY! Medical: MY NAME IS JENNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!(there were echoes you wouldn''t believe.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone in Winslow, Maine didn''t like Mr. Wood: In Memory of Beza Wood Departed this life Nov. 2, 1837 Aged 45 yrs. Here lies one Wood Enclosed in wood One Wood Within another. The outer wood Is very good: We cannot praise The other. On a grave from the 1880''s in Nantucket, Massachusetts: Under the sod and under the trees Lies the body of Jonathan Pease. He is not here, there''s only the pod: Pease shelled out and went to God. The grave of Ellen Shannon in Girard, Pennsylvania is almost a consumer tip: Who was fatally burned March 21, 1870 by the explosion of a lamp filled with "R.E. Danforth''s Non-Explosive Burning Fluid" Oops! Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York: Born 1903 - Died 1942 Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the car was on the way down. It was. In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery: Here lies an Atheist All dressed up And no place to go.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady lost her handbag during a day of shopping. It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her. Looking in her purse, she commented, "Hmmm.... That''s funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are twenty singles." The boy replied, "That''s right, lady. The last time I found a lady''s purse, she didn''t have change for a reward."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Float like a butterfly Sting like a bee I slept with yo momma Now it burns when I pee !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do chicken coops have two doors? Because if it had four doors it''d be a chicken sedan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you tell the truth, you don''t have to remember everything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On opening his new store, a man received a bouquet of flowers. He became dismayed on reading the enclosed card, which expressed "Deepest Sympathy". While puzzling over the message, his telephone rang. It was the florist, apologizing for having sent the wrong card. "Oh, it''s all right," said the storekeeper. "I''m a businessman and I understand how these things can happen." "But," added the florist, "I accidentally sent your card to a funeral party." "Well, what did it say?" ask the storekeeper. "''Congratulations on your new location''," was the reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Vice President and his best friends were out hunting birds. People in the office knew that the best friend had some dirt on the vice president. When the vice president came back from hunting, the guy that owned the hunting place asked, "Where''s your friend?" The Vice President started to shake and said, "Oh he''s still hunting. I have my animals in this gym bag here." "O.k." A week later he came back alone. Then when he got to the car the next day a police man was writing a parking ticket. The officer said, "Sorry, sir, but I have to write you a ticket," and glanced at his police partner in his police car. Then the Vice President said, "Ok, let me just unlock the car and I''ll be on my way." Then when he clicked the trunk opener by accident, the trunk popped, and there was his best friend dead in the trunk and he said, "Oops ..." This shows how stupid some politicans can be.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you get free tickets to a concert fast? A: Bring a gun to the box-office.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Order a cheese burger with no cheese. 2. Ask if they would like to buy some soap. 3. Sing "I think your tractor''s sexy" 4. If you''re in a drive-through, say, "Man, I think you''re ugly." 5. Keep changing your order for over an hour. 6. When you pull up to the window, try to make it look like your window won''t go down. 7. Ask how much it would be to be in the restaurant while in the drive through. 8. Have a Chinese accent and order a soda but not a certain kind and say, "No, no Dr. Pepper he no certified doctor." 9. In the drive through say, "I''m holding Ronald McDonald hostage. For his release I want 3 big macs and a sonic toy." 10. If you''re at a life insurance place, order a big mac.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When is a pencil not a pencil? When it''s on a Pentagon shopping list - then it''s a "portable hand-held communications inscriber", says a Republican senator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('William P. Holcomb''s job is to supervise the tracking down of Houston, Texas parking ticket violators. It was revealed that he himself had 375 unpaid tickets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bunch of men are in a locker room at the gym, just out from the steam room. One man''s phone rings, he answers it. The conversation between him and his girlfriend is as follows: "Hey honey!" "hey..." "I love ya!" "When are you gonna be home to feed us?" "Fuck ya''all! I hate you! The kids can starve!" "I''ve been loyal to you and this is what I get?!" "Go fuck a cow!" "I never wanna see your face again!" "Yours neither!" The man hangs up, laughing. "So, who''s phone is this anyway?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock! Who''s there? Ya. Ya who? What are you getting so excited about?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re a video game freak if ... You hire a babysitter to watch your video games. When you go swimming you put your nintendo D.S. in the glove box so no one will try to commit a felony and try to steal it. You cry when your data gets deleted. When you lose a disc you blame everyone you can so you can be in denial. You have every system since the pong game. You know who and when created all of your games. You are eaisly entertained when you hear that the nintendo stock market raises. You talk to your friends for two hours discussing which is better: Age of mythology or Age of Empires, only to come to the conclusion that you''re eating pizza tonight to discuss it deeper. When you get on to someone elses computer you refer to yourself as a "hacker." You pray that to God that there''s no power outage in the next 3 days because you have to do some "light" gaming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now I lay me down to sleep; If I die before I wake, Please somebody; step on the BRAKE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Josh was never the most gifted child, but for this he couldn''t really be blamed. His mother, Maria, was no better than him. However, the singular talent that he possessed was an odd one: He could memorize everything he ate. His mother didn''t see this as satisfactory, but she decided to put his talent to good use; how you ask? Simply by writing, "Brilliant! Be brilliant!" on his lunch bag!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t worry, you aren''t fat. You''re only "fluffy"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 1 RE: Christmas Party I''m happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We''ll have a small band playing traditional carols - feel free to sing along. And don''t be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00pm. Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone''s pockets. This gathering is only for employees! A special announcement will be made by our CEO at that time! Merry Christmas to you and your family. Patty', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(To understand this joke you should read the Wocka joke entitled: December 1st. Enjoy.) FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 2nd RE: Holiday Party In no way was yesterday''s memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on we''re calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians or those still celebrating Reconciliation Day. There will be no Christmas tree present. No Christmas carols sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment. Happy now? Happy Holidays to you and your families. Patty (Continuation Wocka Joke entitled: December 3rd.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(To fully enjoy this joke, please read the Wocka jokes entittled: December 1st December 2nd Enjoy!) FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 3rd RE: Holiday Party Regarding the note I received from a member of "Alcoholics Anonymous" requesting a non-drinking table - you didn''t sign your name. I''m happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only", you wouldn''t be anonymous anymore. How am I supposed to handle this? Forget about the gifts exchange. No gift exchangements are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and executives believe $10.00 is a little chintzy. NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED!!! Patty (Continuation Wocka joke: December 7th.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(To understand this joke, you should read the Wocka jokes: December 1st. December 2nd. December 3rd. December 7th. Enjoy!) FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 10th RE: The Holiday Party Vegetarians? I''ve had it with you people! We''re going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not. So you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you''ll get your salad bar (including organic tomatoes). But you know, tomatoes have feelings too. They scream when you slice them. I''ve heard them scream. I''m hearing them scream right NOW! I hope you all have a rotten holiday! The Bitch from HELL! (Continuation joke on Wocka: December 14th.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FROM: Joan Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: December 14 RE: Patty Lewis and Holiday Party I''m sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery and I''ll continue to forward your cards to her. In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay. Happy Holidays!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pointer + Setter = Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet. Kerry Blue Terrier + Skye Terrier = Blue Skye, a dog for visionaries. Great Pyrenees + Dachshund = Pyradachs, a puzzling breed. Pekinese + Lhasa Apso = Peekasso, an abstract dog. Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel = Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle. Labrador Retriever + Curly Coated Retriever = Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of research scientists everywhere. Newfoundland + Basset Hound = Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for financial advisors. Terrier + Bulldog = Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes. Malamute + Pointer = Moot Point, a dog that....oh, well, it doesn''t matter anyway. Collie + Malamute = Commute, a dog that travels to work. Deerhound + Terrier = Derriere, a dog that''s true to the end. Bull Terrier + Shih Tzu = Bullshitz, a gregarious but unreliable breed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING: if your answer "yes" to any of these questions then you know that you are weird and you believe too much in dragons. Ocasionally when you see a bird do you find yourself saying "O merlin hand me my mighty sword so I can slay this foul dragon"? Do you find yourself trying to rob a bank with a bow and arrow? Do you have any "magic staffs" lying around? Do you search for dragon eggs for at least 1 hour every day? Do you refer to your car as your "trusty steed"? Do your think your phone is a magical scrying device? When you call the cops, do you call them the saviors? Have you ever seen yourself writing in an ancient language(A.K.A. gibberish.)? When you kill something or when your refering to something dead do you call it "slain"? Whenever someone turns off the light do you scream "ahh magic, run and fear from the evil witch!"?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) The Code of Ethics for Lawyers. 2) Americans'' Guide to Etiquette. 3) The World Guide to Good American Beer. 4) Safe Places to Travel in the USA. 5) Bill Clinton: A Portrait of Integrity. 6) The Wit and Wisdom of Dan Quayle. 7) Consumer Marketing Ethics. 8) Career Opportunities for History Majors. 9) Great Women Drivers Of Today. 10) Beauty Secrets by Janet Reno. 11) Things I Love About Bill By: Hillary Clinton. 12) My Life''s Memories By: Ronald Reagan. 13) Things I Can''t Afford By: Bill Gates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Arab fathers are showing each other their family photos. One shows the other a picture and says "This is my oldest, he is a martyr. This is my second oldest, he is also a martyr." The other Arab father just sighs and says "Ahh, they blow up so quickly these days!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Fandersan family is a family with two parents and two kids. One day, Mr. Fandersan decided to bring home a state of the art moterhome. When he got home with the motorhome, he left it in the driveway. He then went to bed. But, the next day it was missing. On the driveway there was a note. It said, "We have stolen the motorhome." The parents were freaked out!! "This is a parent''s worst nightmare!! Our kids have stolen the car AND are home alone!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick Cheney had a problem. He was been sued for 200 million dollars. He asks everybody in the West Wing for advice. However, only President Bush has any good advice: " Why don''t you take them hunting?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma is so poor, when you asked for milk she said,"left or right?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many publishers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Three. One to screw it in and two more to hold down the editor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of the funniest things I''ve heard in a long time. I was watching T.V. and an advertisement for the show, "Monk" comes on. I don''t watch the show, but I love the commercials He says to a Dr: "I''m not even stalking you. At least not at the moment." I laughed for at least ten minutes. Even snorted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a lady that had a 3 year old son and one was coming on the way (she was pregnant). When the 3 year old asked his mother why her stomach was so big, she told him that it was just gas (she didn''t want to give him a confusing explanation). The day that the baby was born, the 3 year old came up to the baby and said, "Hey, Fart!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man in car, Went to bar. Feeling nifty, Doing fifty. Hit a car, Poor old soul. Doctor''s fee, CEMETARY!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are stuck in a room with absolutely no doors, no windows, and no escape. You are surrounded by 415 inch think metal walls. All you have is a mirror and a table. How do you get out? Well, you look into the mirror. You saw yourself, right? Now, use the saw to chop the table in half. To halves make a whole, so jump through the hole. Then yell at the top of your lungs until your voice is hoarse, then jump on the horse and ride away! =)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. They don''t sell tickets, they sell chances. 2. All the insurance machines in the terminal are sold out. 3. Before the flight, the passengers get together and elect a pilot. 4. If you kiss the wing for luck before boarding, it kisses you back. 5. You cannot board the plane unless you have the exact change. 6. Before you took off, the stewardess tells you to fasten your Velcro. 7. The Captain asks all the passengers to chip in a little for gas. 8. When they pull the steps away, the plane starts rocking. 9. The Captain yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway. 10. You ask the Captain how often their planes crash and he sez, "Just once." 11. No movie. Don''t need one. 12. Your life keeps flashing before your eyes. 13. You see a man with a gun, but he''s demanding to be let off the plane. 14. All the planes have both a bathroom and a chapel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did one chart say to the other? A: "My! You''re awfully graphic!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some small ads that didn''t quite come out right on paper - For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex. For Sale - Eight puppies from a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Hussy. Great Dames for sale. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. 2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7 wks old, Perfect markings, 555-1234. Leave mess. Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did they mean these ads to read as they do? Man, honest. Will take anything. Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References required. Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary. Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink. 3-year-old teacher need for pre-school. Experience preferred. Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included. Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory. Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night. Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Indian chief introduced his wife to a newspaper reporter; "This is Three Horse." "That''s a picturesque name," said the reporter. "Does it have deep symbolism?" "Yes," the chief replied. "Nag, nag, nag!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is soooo poor that her front and back door are on the same hinge!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock Who''s there? Idunnap. Idunnap who? Well, you best get to the toilet then! (For those of you who don''t understand you''re meant to say, "i done a poo!")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aren''t you tired of those stupid, mushy greeting cards down at the card store? Here''s what a real friend would send to another... Dear friend, When you are sad, I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad... When you are blue, I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you... When you smile, I''ll know you finally got laid... When you are scared, I''ll will rag about it every chance I get... When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whinin''... When you are confuse, I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass... When you are sick, stay away from me until you''re well again. I don''t want whatever you have... When you fall, I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass... Sincerely, Your friend', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While reading a newspaper, Morty came across an article about a beautiful actress marrying a football player who was not noted for his IQ. "I''ll never understand," he said to his wife, "Why do the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives." His wife replied, "Why, thank you, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma smells so bad, when she went into the enchanted forest, all the skunks commited suicide!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re like school on Saturday... NO CLASS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about camping? It''s intense. (In tents!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer and his son live on a farm in the middle of Nowhere, USA. One day the farmboy says to his father, "I''m bored." His father replies, "What are you talking about? Farm life is great!" He then adds, "However, I will admit, it is a little slow though. Nothing much to do except count the bricks in the silo." To this the boy says, "11,827."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you catch a unique rabbit? You nique up on it! How do you catch a tame rabbit? The tame way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A licalottapus!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One lesbian said to the other, "I''ll just be Frank with you," ...and the other said, "Ok, you be Frank today and I''ll be Frank tommorrow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call two Chinese queers? Two can chew!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this blonde who had taken up golf for a long time. When she was ready to play, the 1st round she came back in 20 minutes and told the pro she was stung by a bee. He asked where. She said, "Between the first hole and the second hole." He said, "Sounds like your stance is too wide."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you left him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, at lunch at an elementary school, the cafeteria was serving swiss cheese. A little girl received her meal and was disgusted by it. "Miss lunch lady," she said at the end of the line, "I don''t like the holes in my cheese." "That''s okay," she said. "Just eat around them and leave them on your plate."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three guys at an award ceremony for their school: a not-so-smart one, an average one, and a smart one. The not-so-smart one proudly boasts, "I''m going to receive an award today!" The average one was a bit skeptical about this and asks, "What kind of award will that be?" Before the not-so-smart on was able to reply, the smart one said, "The Most Improved Award."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and his wife check into a hotel. The husband wants to have a drink at the bar, but his wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to their room to rest. She lies down on the bed... just then, and elevated train passes by very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she''s thrown out of the bed. Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down once more. Again a train shakes the room so violently, she''s pitched to the floor. Exasperated, she calls the front desk, asks for the manager. The manager says he''ll be right up. The manager is skeptical but the wife insists the story is true. "Look... lie here on the bed -- you''ll be thrown right to the floor!" So he lies down next to the wife. Just then the husband walks in. "What," he says, "are you doing here!?!" The manager calmly replies, "Would you believe I''m waiting for a train?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife are getting ready to go to bed. The husband says, "I thought we''d have sex tonight." The wife replies, "No, I''m too tired tonight." The husband says, "Is that your final answer?" The wife says, "Yes, it is, thank you." The husband says, "OK, then, I''d like to phone a friend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyer Says Client is Not That Guilty (Just how guilty was he?) Legislator Wants Tougher Death Penalty (I say, give it to him.) Man Jumps Off Bridge. Neither Jumper Nor Body Found (What?) After Detour to California Shuttle Returns to Earth (Well, this confirms what many of us have suspected about California.) Woman Improving After Fatal Crash (Modern science is amazing, isn''t it?)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beer... it''s the cause and solution to all men''s problems!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the patron saint of playgrounds? St. Francis of a see-saw!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either. The money is always greener in the other guy''s wallet. When money talks, no one criticizes its accent. I love my cat. My cat does not care. My bank account needs month-to-month resuscitation. Everyone needs to believe in something. I believe in chocolate. Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. Don''t worry about the world ending today. It''s already tomorrow in Australia. What if the Hokey Pokey is really what it''s all about? Does it scare you that you are looking for wisdom from a T-shirt? A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. Jesus loves you, but I think you''re a jerk. Thousands of years ago, cats were worshiped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this. Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change ready.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth. If I save time, when do I get it back? What was the best thing before sliced bread? Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. Experience is something you don''t get until just after you need it. The gene pool could use a little chlorine. I may be fat, but you are ugly and I can lose weight. I''m really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me. It''s lonely at the top, but you eat better. Smile. It''s the second best thing you can do with your lips. If the left side of the brain controls the right hand, then only left-handed people are in their right mind. Why does your nose run and your feet smell? Does fuzzy logic tickle? All men are animals; some just make better pets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional. God put me on earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now, I am so far behind I will live forever. Life is too short. Don''t be a jerk. Friends are the chocolate chips in the cookies of life. If life is like a bowl of cherries, then I''m living in the pits! Good judgment comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment. If they don''t have chocolate in heaven, I''m not going. Germs attack people where they are weakest. This explains the number of head colds. It''s not just the ups and downs that make life difficult. It''s the jerks. I don''t know what I want, but I do know I don''t have it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly and for the same reason. The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it limits. Drive carefully. It''s not only cars that can be recalled by their maker. Go ahead and take risks. Just be sure that everything will turn out OK. STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS. I don''t work here. I''m a consultant. When in doubt, tell the truth. (Mark Twain) Constant change is here to stay. Don''t let the past hold you back. You''re missing today''s good stuff! Enthusiasm is contagious. Start an epidemic! Education is expensive, but ignorance is more so.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During work Mike and John are chatting, Mike: "I''ve been taking night courses for five months now, and I have an exam next week." John: "Oh!" Mike: "For example, do you know who Graham Bell is?" John: "No." Mike: "He is the inventor of the phone in 1876. If you take night courses you would know this." The next day the same discussiontook place: Mike: "Do you know who Alexander Dumas is?" John: "No." Mike: "He is the author of "The 3 Musketeers". If you took night courses you would know this." The next day, once again: Mike: "And do you know who Jean Jacques Rousseau is?" John: "No." Mike: "He''s the author of "Confessions", if you took night courses you would know this." Now this time John got irritated and said, "And do you know who Steven Turner is?" Mike: "No." John: "He is the guy sleeping with your wife! If you stopped night duties you would know this!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the one thing you get at a wedding and cannot give back no matter how much you despise and hate it? IN-LAWS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confucius say... ~He who value skin does not wash cat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are four people on a plane. a guy from england, a guy from france, a guy from texas, and a guy from mexico, all of a sudden the plane starts falling out of the sky. The pilot says "We a losing altitude we need to get rid of some weight. So they throw everything out of the plane, but its still falling. So the english guy says" for the queen" and jumps out, the french guy says" vi va la france" and jumps out. The texan say "for the alamo" he grabs the mexican and throws him out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping. (why wait that long) 2) Thou shall not do drugs. (alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.) 3) Thou shall not steal from K-Mart. (Walmart has a bigger selection) 4) Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism. (destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this) 5) Thou shall not steal from your parents. (everyone knows grandma has more money) 6) Thou shall not get into fights. (Cat fight anyhow...just start them.) 7) Thou shall not skip class. (just take the whole day off) 8) Thou shall not strip in class. (Hooters pays more) 9) Thou shall not think about having sex. (like Nike says, "just do it") 10) Thou shall not help old ladies across the street. (just leave''m in the middle)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between an intelligent man and a UFO? A: I don''t know, I''ve never seen either. Q: What are two reasons why men don''t mind their own business? A: (1)No mind (2)No business', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Tim are out one day test driving cars. They happen to pull up to the same stop light side by side. Bill yells out his window, "HEY TIM, Corvette?" Tim yells back "YUP THIS IS A CORVETTE" Tim yells again "HEY BILL, Audi?" Bill jumps out of his car pulls up his shirt, points to his belly button and says, "Nope! I got an INNY!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This summer, I went on a trip to Houston. I needed to go really badly, so I stopped behind a tree. A minute later, I darted out being chased by a hungry squirrel. He wanted some nuts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('IBM and IBC combine to create the perfect computer for financial management. Here''s the headline on the weekly paper. IBM: Do You?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Billy why are you late? Billy: Because the sign said "Children Slow"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Question: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Answer: Elephino (Hell-if-I-know)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? A vampire only sucks blood at night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A retiree was given a set of golf clubs by his co-workers. Thinking he''d try the game, he asked the local pro for lessons, explaining that he knew nothing whatever of the game. The pro showed him the stance and swing, then said, "Just hit the ball toward the flag on the first green." The novice teed up and smacked the ball straight down the fairway and onto the green, where it stopped inches from the hole. "Now what?" the fellow asked the speechless pro. "Uh... you''re supposed to hit the ball into the cup," the pro finally said, after he was able to speak again. The retiree replied, "Oh great! NOW you tell me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Miss Jones had been giving her second-grade students a lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron. Now it was question time, and she asked, "My name begins with the letter ''M'' and I pick up things. What am I?" A little boy on the front row proudly said, "You''re a mother!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I seen a commercial on T.V for a pill that helps with ED (erectile deficency). As one of the side effects the announcer said "If you experience an erection for longer than four hours call your doctor." I thought call my doctor?? If I have an erection for more than four hours I am calling Ripley''s Believe it or Not!!.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so hairy that I thought she had herself in a headlock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Nunya! Nunya who? Nunya Damn Business!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Life isn''t fair. I went to my boss with a note from my doctor stating that I have multiple personalities. Now I do three different jobs and still only get one paycheck!!.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How come you never hear anything about the 10th reindeer, Olive? Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names." What''s the most popular wine at Christmas? "I don''t like sprouts"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did you learn in school today? Not enough, apparently. I have to go back tomorrow!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t witches wear panties? To get a better grip on their broom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Glow in the dark sunglasses A book on how to read A dictionary index Watermelon seed sorter Zero proof alcohol Reusable ice cubes See through toilet tissue Skinless bananas Do it yourself roadmap', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wilma and her husband Barney go to church every Sunday, and during the service Barney falls asleep. One afternoon Wilma goes to the priest and asks what she can do. The priest hands her a needle and tells her to prick him with it every time he falls asleep. The next week at church Barney falls asleep while the priest is talking and when the priest asks, "Who is our savior?" Wilma pokes him with the needle, and he yells out "JESUS!" Soon after that he goes back to sleep. The next question the priest asks is, "Who is Jesus''s Father?" Wilma pokes him with the needle and Barney yells out "GOD!" and goes back to sleep. The last question the priest asks is, "What did Eve say to Adam after he impregnated her for the 99th time?" Wilma pricks him with the needle again and he yells, "IF YOU POKE THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME I''LL SNAP IT IN HALF AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Indian walks into a cafe with a shotgun in one hand pulling a male buffalo with the other. He says to the waiter, "Want coffee." The waiter says, "Sure, Chief, coming right up." He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee The Indian drinks the coffee down in one gulp, turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere, then just walks out. The next morning the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand pulling another male buffalo with the other. He walks up to the counter and says to the waiter, "Want coffee." The waiter says, "Whoa, Tonto! We''re still cleaning up your mess from yesterday. What was all that about, anyway?" The Indian smiles and proudly says, "Training for position in United States Congress: Come in, drink coffee, shoot the bull, leave mess for others to clean up, disappear for rest of day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday a cowboy went to church. When he entered, he saw that he and the preacher were the only ones present. The preacher asked the cowboy if he wanted him to go ahead and preach. The cowboy said, "I''m not too smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I''d feed him." So the minister began his sermon. One hour passed, then two hours, then two-and-a-half hours. The preacher finally finished and came down to ask the cowboy how he had liked the sermon. The cowboy answered slowly, "Well, I''m not too smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I sure wouldn''t feed him all the hay."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, looking at the old pages as he turned them. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed in between the pages. "Momma, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. With astonishment, he claimed: "I think it''s Adam''s suit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pious man, who had reached the age of 105, suddenly stopped going to synagogue. Alarmed by the old fellow''s absence after so many years of faithful attendance, the rabbi went to see him. He found him in excellent health, so the rabbi asked; "How come after all these years we don''t see you at services any more?" The old man lowered his voice. "I''ll tell you, Rabbi," he whispered. "When I got to be 90, I expected God to take me any day. But then I got to be 95, then 100, then 105, so I figured that God is very busy and must''ve forgotten about me, and I don''t want to remind Him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge scowled down at a repeat offender before him. "Haven''t I seen you in here many times already? And didn''t I tell you that I never wanted to see you in here again?" "Yes, Your Honor," the defendant replied. "That''s exactly what I told the police officer, but he insisted I come in anyway!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what your problem is? Your brain is too tense... too tense the size of everybody else''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gloria the blonde once heard that milk baths would make you beautiful. She left a note for her milkman Alan to leave 15 gallons of milk. When Alan read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the door to clarify the order. Gloria came to the door, and Alan said, "I found your note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 15 gallons or 1.5 gallons?" Gloria said, "I want 15 gallons. I''m going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath." Alan asked, "Oh, alright, would you like it pasteurized?" Gloria replied, "No, just up to my waist."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were some backwoods hillbillies living across the river from each other, who feuded constantly. John hated Clarence with a passion and never passed up a chance to throw rocks across the river at Clarence. This went on for years until one day the Corps of Engineers came to build a bridge across that river. John was elated; he told his wife that finally he was going to get the chance to cross over and whip Clarence. He left the house and returned in a matter of minutes. His wife asked what was wrong, didn''t he intend to go over the bridge and whip Clarence? He replied that he never had really seen Clarence up close and didn''t realize his size until he started over the bridge and saw the sign: "CLEARANCE 8 FT 3 IN"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... On stag night, you take a real deer. You use a 55 Chevy as a guest house. Your back porch is bigger than your house. There is more oil in your cap than in your car. You think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture. A full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat. An expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall. You think Old Yeller is a movie about your brother''s tooth. You watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips. Your secret family recipe is illegal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma''s so poor, she can''t afford to go on welfare. Yo mamma''s so poor, she got thrown out of a homeless shelter. Yo mamma''s so poor, she tried to use food stamps on a gumball machine. Yo mamma''s so poor, a burgler broke into her house and left her some money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you''re in a gay church? If half the congregation is kneeling!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It happened one time that a very old lady, whose husband had died, took a walk in the woods. She came across a young man whose hormones were raging. The young man tripped the old lady and came on top of her; she screamed and was heard by a couple walking not too far from them, but by the time they arrived the young man was doing the thing. When the young couple tried to pull him off the old lady,the old lady said, "Let him go ahead and see what his intention is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nun was walking in the convent when one of the priests noticed she was gaining a little weight. "Gaining a little weight are we sister Susan?" he asked. "No, Father. Just a little gas," Sister Susan explained. A month or so later the priest noticed that she had gained even more weight. "Gaining some weight are we Sister Susan?" he asked again. "Oh no, Father. Just a little gas," she replied again. A couple of months later the priest noticed Sister Susan pushing a baby carriage around the convent. He leaned over and looked in the carriage and said, "Cute little fart."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Shortly after the 911 emergency number became available, an elderly and quite ill lady appeared in a hospital emergency room, having driven herself to the hospital and barely managing to stagger in from the parking lot. The horrified nurse said, "Why didn''t you call the 911 number and get an ambulance?" The lady said, "My phone doesn''t have an eleven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pub and sits down next to a man with a dog at his feet. "Does your dog bite?" "No." A few minutes later the dog takes a huge chunk out of his leg. "I thought you said your dog didn''t bite!" the man says indignantly. "That''s not my dog."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was set up by Google as a joke. Enjoy! Please do the following: 1. Open Google. 2. Type, "french military victories". 3. Click: I''m Feeling Lucky. 4. Enjoy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This was set up by Google. Enjoy! Please do the following: 1. Open Google. 2. Type "failure". 3. Click: I''m Feeling Lucky. 4. Enjoy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was speeding down the highway, feeling secure in a gaggle of cars all traveling at the same speed. However, as they passed a speed trap, he got nailed with an infrared speed detector and was pulled over. The officer handed him the citation, received his signature and was about to walk away when the man asked, "Officer, I know I was speeding, but I don''t think it''s fair - there were plenty of other cars around me who were going just as fast, so why did *I* get the ticket?" "Ever go fishing?" the policeman suddenly asked the man. "Ummm, yeah..." the startled man replied. The officer grinned and added, "Ever catch *all* the fish?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? A. Slow down and use a lubricant. Q. What''s six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? A. Money. Q. What''s the difference between your wife and your job? A. After five years your job will still suck. Q. How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony? A. It''s not hard. Q. Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony? A. The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts. Q: Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony? A. She is the one who can eat the last donut! Q: What''s the difference between a blimp and 365 blow jobs? A: One is a Goodyear, and the other is a great year! Q: Why do the men in Scotland wear kilts? A: Because the sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blonde and a brunette in a car. The brunette hears a siren behind them, so she asks the blonde if its lights are on. The blonde turns around and says "yes, no, yes, no....."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get if you drop a piano on the seventh dwarf? A: A diminished seventh!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know why single women can''t fart? Because they don''t get assholes untill they get married.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Professionals built the Titanic. An amateur built the ark.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and throws down a bet. 100 dollars to anyone who can do 100 pushups. A man disappears outside and returns minutes later. "I''ll take that bet" the man says, and collapses after 50 pushups. "I don''t get it", he says," I just did 150 outside!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was settling down to his after-dinner drink when he daughter climbs onto his lap. "Where does poo come from?" asks his inquisitive girl. The man knew these types of questions would come, and had given some thought to the answer he would give. "Well, sweetheart, you know the dinner you just ate? Well, our bodies keep the good parts, called nutrients, so our bones and muscles can grow strong. The rest passes out of our backsides, and that''s poo." After a shocked silence, the girl trembles through another question for her father... "Umm... so where does Tigger come from?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(This joke was copied from the "Fresh Price of Bel Air" show and are not my original jokes). 40 is the begining.... the begining of the end. 40 is the begining of life. Did I say life?... i meant gum disease!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All of his life Stosh had heard stories of an amazing family tradition. It seems that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all been able to walk on water on their 21st birthday. On that day, they''d walk across the lake to the boat club for their first legal drink. So when Stosh''s 21st birthday came around, he and his pal Stan took a boat out to the middle of the lake. Stosh stepped out of the boat and nearly drowned! Stan just managed to pull him to safety. Furious and confused, Stosh went to see his grandmother. "Grandma, it''s my 21st birthday, so why can''t I walk across the lake like my father, his father, and his father before him?" Granny looked into Stosh''s eyes and said, "Because, you dumb ass, your father, grandfather and great grandfather were born in January, but you were born in July."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Baptist preacher was seated next to a cowboy on a flight to Texas. After the plane took off, the cowboy asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the preacher if he would like a drink. Appalled, the preacher replied, "I''d rather be tied up and taken advantaged of by women of ill-repute than to let liquor touch my lips." The cowboy then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me, too. I didn''t know we had a choice...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You were speaking much too long on the phone just now, Miss Ponsonby, said Mr.Jones. "But it was a business call, Mr. Jones." "Well, please don''t address our clients as ''sweetikins''in the future."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom had just placed some flypaper out when my little cousin wandered in. She was fascinated watching the flies get caught. Finally, my mom asked, "Molly, don''t you have flies in your house?" "Yeah, we have flies. We just don''t have anything for them to sit on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Smart Is Your Right Foot? This is so funny that it will boggle your mind, and you will keep trying it at least 50 more times to see if you can outsmart your foot - but you can''t! 1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles with it. 2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.. Your foot will change direction! I told you so.. And there is nothing you can do about it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in St. Louis, but by the time police arrived on the scene, fourteen pedestrians had boarded the bus and had begun to complain of whiplash injuries and back pain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend of mine and his family were taking a trip to the mall. On the way, their 18 month old son had a massive blow out poopy diaper. In the mall parking lot, the diaper was changed and put in a Dillard''s bag. Embarrassed by the incredibly bad smell, the couple decided to leave the bag on the hood of the car to be thrown in a dumpster as opposed to a mall trash can. A couple of hours later when the family was returning to the car, they saw an old, beat up pick-up stop at their car. A young man jumped out and hurriedly threw the Dillard''s bag into the cab. He got back in and the pick up sped off with what he thought was a mighty haul.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man worked hard all day digging the garden and felt very stiff and sore. His wife fluttered about him, pleased with the amount of work he had done and anxious to get him to do some more. "Have a nice soak in the bath and I''ll bring you a drink," she suggested smiling. "Good idea," says the husband looking forward to being waited on. He''s in the bath when she comes in with a nice glass of Scotch which he accepts happily. "If there''s anything else you''d like just call," says the wife as she leaves the bathroom. When she got halfway along the landing the husband relaxes completely and lets off an enormous long fart in the bath. A few minutes later, despite it being a very warm Summer''s evening, the wife comes in with a fluffy bed warmer "What the heck is that for?" asks the husband snappily. "Oh Darling," says the wife, flustered, "I thought I heard you say, "Whataboutahottawaterbottle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did God create men? Because vibrators can''t mow the lawn. Madonna All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others. Henry Youngman To attract men, I wear a perfume called ''New Car Interior''. Rita Rudner This guy says, ''I''m perfect for you, because I''m a cross between a macho and a sensitive man.'' I said, ''Oh, a gay trucker?'' Judy Tenuta Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself -- like, for instance, he can''t find any clean socks. Jean Kerr Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we''ve always had: work or prison. Tim Allen I love men, even though they''re lying, cheating scumbags. Gwyneth Paltrow', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair, drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. The neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged that she came over and shouted at me, "You should be hung!" I slowly took a long drink from my can of Old Milwaukee Light, wiped the cold foam from my lips, lifted my darkened Oakley sunglasses and looked at this nosy ass neighbor and replied, "I am. That''s why she cuts the grass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man goes into the Social Security Office and fills out an application. Too old to have a birth certificate, he is asked to prove he is old enough. He opens his shirt and shows them the gray hair on his chest and they accept that as proof. He goes home to his wife, shows her the check, and explains to her what has happened. She replies, "Well, get back down there, pull down your pants, and see if you can get disability!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You momma so stupid, when I asked her,"Why she was yelling into an envelope."She said "She was trying to send voice mail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat and stupid, when her doctor told her to go on a seafood diet, she says OK, I see food, I eat it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she entered a fat contest she won 1st, 2nd, and 3rd prizes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a cute volcano? Lava-ble!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There''s a knob called ''brightness'' but it doesn''t work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two groups of people. The first one was of a taxi driver who was driving at a high speed that all the passengers knelt and prayed. The second was of a priest who was preaching but boring the people to the extent that they started walking out. WHO BROUGHT PEOPLE CLOSER TO GOD? The taxi-driver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In 1976, the Pentagon returned 50 security doors because of a design flaw. The doors, which cost $1,500.00 each, had titanium locks and handles, and a 0.0001" clearance at all edges. The problem was discovered when an angry secretary threw her coffee cup at one of the doors. It went right through the 1/16 inch wood veneer. It was also discovered that if you pulled on the handle, it would come off in your hand. In 1948, Mayor Jose Hussong, of Baja California, Mexico had a section of highway named after him by the people of his city. On the day it was to be dedicated, a group of officials waited for him to arrive. After they had waited for 2 hours, one of the officials went to the mayor''s estate. He was informed that the mayor had been dead for 2 years. The official returned to the dedication and announced that the Mayor was unable to attend due to health problems.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not flunk; He keepeth me from lying down when I should be studying. He leadeth me beside the water cooler for a study break; He restoreth my faith in study guides. He leads me to better study habits For my grades sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of borderline grades, I will not have a nervous breakdown; For thou art with me. My prayers and my friends, they comfort me. Thou givest me answers in moments of blankness; Thou anointest my head with understanding. My test paper runneth over with questions I recognize. Surely passing grades and flying colors shall follow me All the days of my examinations, And I shall not have to dwell in this university forever, Amen!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things You Don''t Want to Hear When Regaining Consciousness "I don''t know what it is, but hurry up and pack it in ice." "Hey Charlie, unzip the bag on that one, he''s still moving." "Blink once for ''yes''." "What do you mean we have the wrong patient?" "Why is there a tag on his toe?" "Do you think he can hear us?" "I didn''t even know a human could bend that way." "I''m sorry, we must not have used enough anasthesia." "Just relax now. We''ll be done in a jiffy." "Hold the patient still, we''ve almost pried it open." "Did the doctor know he would look like that afterwards?" "Of course I''ve performed this operation before, Nurse!" "Nurse, make sure you''re getting all this down." "It''ll make a great ''ER'' script."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man awoke in a hospital bed after a complicated operation, and found that the curtains were drawn around him. "Why are the curtains closed?" he said. "Is it night?" A nurse replied, "No, it''s just that there is a fire across the street, and we didn''t want you waking up and thinking that the operation was unsuccessful."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ON MODERNISM How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools. THOUGHTS ON METAPHYSICS Deja Vu: The feeling that somehow, somewhere, you''ve been kicked in the head like this before. ON DEEP THOUGHTS A day without sunshine is like night. ON PARADOX AND RETURN POLICIES There is a CD out entitled "The Worst of Jefferson Airplane". If you buy this, take it home, play it, and enjoy it, should you take it back and demand a refund? ON HIGHER EDUCATION College is a fountain of knowledge... and the students are there to drink.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent On-line poll 38,562 men across the UK were asked to identify a woman''s ultimate fantasy. 98.8% of the respondents said that a woman''s ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once. While this has been verified by a recent sociological study, it appears that most men do not realize that in this fantasy, one man is cooking and the other is cleaning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After the man received the full treatment - shave, shampoo, manicure, haircut, etc. - he placed the boy in the chair. "I''m goin'' to buy a green tie to wear for the parade," he said. "I''ll be back in a few minutes." When the boy''s haircut was completed and the man still hadn''t returned, the barber said, "Looks like your daddy''s forgotten all about you." "That wasn''t my daddy," said the boy. "He just walked up, took me by the hand and said, ''Come on, son, we''re gonna get a free haircut!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, did you hear about the... Paper company that folded? Brake company on the skids? Bra manufacturers that went bust? Surgeon who was forced to take a cut in his salary? Cigarette company that went up in smoke? Baker who was short of dough? Refrigerator manufacturer that had its assets frozen? Corset firm that felt the squeeze? Upholsterers that couldn''t cover their costs? Adhesive tape company that got into a sticky situation? Tennis ball manufacturer that ended up in court? Downfall of the bungee suppliers? The train company that went off the rails? The ship building company that sunk? The dental practice that was rotten to its roots?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The little cowboy, Shorty, was leaving the bar to get on his horse for the ride back to the ranch, when he noted that someone had painted his horse''s balls blue. Totally pissed, he went back into the bar and shouted, "Who''s the dirty son of a bitch that painted my horse''s balls blue?!" A big burly guy stood up and said, "I did. Got a problem with that?" "None," says Shorty, "just wanted to let you know he was dry and ready for the 2nd coat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my three-year-old son opened a birthday gift from his grandmother, he discovered a water pistol. He squealed with delight and headed for the nearest sink. I was not so pleased. I turned to Mom and said, "I''m surprised at you. Don''t you remember how we used to drive you crazy with water guns?" Mom smiled and then replied....."I remember."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a golfer whose drive landed on an anthill. Rather than move the ball, he decided to hit it where it lay. He gave a mighty swing. Clouds of dirt and sand and ants exploded from the spot, everything but the golf ball. It sat in the same spot. So he lined up and tried another shot. Clouds of dirt and sand and ants went flying again. The golf ball didn''t even wiggle. Two ants survived. One dazed ant said to the other, "Whoa! What are we going to do?" Said the other ant: "I don''t know about you, but I''m going to get on the ball."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Deciding to take a day off from his important job, a young hot-shot broker went back to visit some of his professors at his old school. Entering the school, he saw a dog attacking a small child. He quickly jumped on the dog and strangled it. The next day, the local paper reported the story with the headline "Valiant Student Saves Boy From Fearsome Dog." The broker called the editor of the paper and strongly suggested that a correction be issued, pointing out that he was no longer a student, but a successful Wall Street broker. The following day, the paper issued a correction, with a headline that read, "Pompous Stock Broker Kills School Mascot."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly man called 911 and said he thought his wife might be dead. Operator: "MIGHT be dead? Sir, can''t you tell if she is dead?" Man: "I''m not quite sure." Operator: "Well, what makes you THINK that she could be dead?" Man: "Well, the sex is the same, but the dishes are beginning to pile up in the sink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A nice girl brings home her fiance to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells her father to find out about the young man. He invites the fiance to his study for a chat. "So, what are your plans?" the father asks the fiance. "I am a Biblical scholar," he replies. "A Biblical scholar. Admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in, as she''s accustomed to?" "I will study," the young man replies, "...and God will provide for us." "And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?" "I will concentrate on my studies, God will provide for us." "And children? How will you support children?" "Don''t worry, sir, God will provide." The conversation proceeds like this, and each time the father questions, the fiance insists that God will provide. Later, the mother asks, "So? How did it go?" "He has no job and no plans, but the good news is he thinks I''m God."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus and Saint Peter are golfing. St. Peter steps up to the tee on a par three and hits one long and straight. It reaches the green. Jesus is up next. He slices it. It heads over the fence into traffic on an adjacent street. Bounces off a truck, onto the roof of a nearby shack and into the rain gutter, down the drain spout and onto a lilly pad at the edge of a lake. A frog jumps up and snatches the ball in his mouth. An eagle swoops down, grabs the frog. As the eagle flies over the green, the frog croaks and drops the ball. It''s in the hole. Saint Peter looks at Jesus, exasperated. "Are you gonna play golf?" he asks "Or are you just gonna fuck around?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The farmer and his wife had worked hard, they scrimped and saved to send their son to college. As soon as he had enrolled, he started to grow a beard. Next he grew a large mustache and sideburns. Being pleased with his new hirsute adornment, he had his picture taken and sent it off to his parents. On the back of the photo he scrawled, "How do you like it? Don''t I look like a count?" Shortly after, the son received this terse note: "You idiot, it cost us a fortune to send you to college, and you can''t even spell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two fish. The first says: "We''re gonna swim 100 miles upstream, have sex, then die." The second says: "So we''re gonna swim 100 miles upstream, then die?" First fish: "Yup" Second: "Are we gonna have sex?" First : "Yup" Second: "Ok count me in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "Can someone tell me three kinds of triangles? Yes, Jimmy?" Jimmy: "OK, so there''s right, isosceles, and you, your husband, and the mailman." The class laughed. "OK, young man. Now you''re going straight to the principal." said the teacher. And the principal laughed too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do when you''re lonely on an Alaskan cruise? Answer: Go to the window and yell "whale"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one virus say to the other virus? Keep away from me, I think I''ve got penicillin!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did one earthquake say to another? Oops! My fault!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dickiedoo Disease: defined as the expansion of the adominal region of the human male to the point where it eliminates the view of the male''s private part from its possessor. Translated into a more commonly used phrase "His belly sticks out further than his Dickiedoo! Also know as Abdominalius Humongus and in some cases where the male appendage is not very large, this condition is known as Male Apparatus Non-existus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "you must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven." The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said. "You may pass through the Pearly Gates," Saint Peter said. The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They''re bells." Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the Pearly Gates." The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women''s underwear. St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?" The man replied, "They''re Carols."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the 12th day of Christmas my true love sent to me 12- Pack of Bud 11 Rasslin'' Tickets 10 tins of Copenhagen 9 Years Probation 8 Holey vests 7 Kissing Cousins 6 Cans of Spam 5 Hunting Hounds 4 Mudgrip tyres 3 Shot Gun Shells 2 more Gaps in Teeth And some parts to a Mustang GT', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Smart-ass Answer #1 A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat ...she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub." Smart-ass Answer #2 A truck driver was driving along on! the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low bridge ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The blondes at the university were tired of not fitting in. They were tired of other students assuming they were just stupid bimbos. They wanted somewhere where they felt they belonged. So they pressured the administration to set up a new Department especially for them. The university agreed, and set up the Blonde Education Department. The blondes were ecstatic to have a department of their own where they could gather without being ridiculed. They felt they really belonged now. They wanted other students to see that they weren''t just stupid bimbos - after all, they now had their own department at the university. They now all proudly wear the official sweatshirt of the Blonde Education Department which sports the saying: "I belong in B.E.D."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Always remember you''re unique. Just like everyone else. 2. Good judgement comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgement. 3. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket. 4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. - Babe Ruth "Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn''t a lot of strokes when you consider the course." - Lee Trevino "I''m not saying my golf game went bad , but if I grew tomatoes, they''d come up sliced." - Lee Trevino "If you think it''s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball." - Jack Lemmon "After all these years, it''s still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye." - Chi Chi Rodriguez "Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf and you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf." - Jack Benny "Golf appeals to the child in us. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five." - John Updike', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Johnny saw his dad got caught on fire. Immeaditly he went to his mom saying, "Mom, mom hurry, dad''s on fire, and I brought the marshmellows!" Another day a lady came to the door asking for things for the old peoples fund. Johnny yelled from the doorway to his mom, "Hey mom, there''s this person asking for the old peoples fund, shall I give them grandma?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A retired US Marine was looking for a new job. He finally found one that appealed to his interests. At the interview, he was asked, "Do you have any military experience?" The Marine replied, "Why, yes! I''ve been in the Marines for a couple of years." "I see," said the interviewer, "any disabilities?" The Marine looked at him and replied shakily. "Well... In the Vietnam War I had a grenade go off between my legs, blowing off my testicles." The interviewer, quite shocked, said "All right, you''re hired. Please report to work on Monday at 10:00am." "Wait wait!" shouted the Marine, "When do the others start? I don''t want any special treatment just because of my disability." The interviewer replied, "Well... I''ll tell you the truth. Everyone normally comes at 7:00 in the morning, but nothing gets done until 10. All we do is sit around, scratching our nuts trying to figure out what to do."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man complaining to a friend: "I had it all - money, a beautiful house, a big car, the love of a beautiful woman ... then ... pow! ... it was all gone!" "What happened?" asked the friend. "Ahhhh ... my wife found out ..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My daughter was going over to the neighbor''s house to visit but didn''t want to miss a call from her boyfriend so she took the cordless phone with her. While at the neighbor''s she wanted to check back at home to see if her younger brother was okay. My daughter then picked up the neighbor''s phone and dialed our number. While waiting for someone to answer the phone at home, the phone she brought over with her began to ring. She immediately hung up the neighbor''s phone and answered our phone. There was no one there. She wanted to know who it was who called so she used our phone to call our house. The line was busy. Getting very frustrated she left the neighbor''s to go home and see who was on the phone. No one was on the phone. My daughter could not figure out what was going on until someone explained it to her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met. I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy. Mental backup in progress - Do not disturb! The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes. Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy. Boycott shampoo! Demand the REAL poo! Black holes are where God divided by zero. If you can''t read this, you''re illiterate. It''s a small world, but I wouldn''t want to paint it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The bumper sticker of a proud parent read: MY SON WAS INMATE OF THE MONTH', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The young man entered the Ice Cream Palace and asked, "What kinds of ice cream do you have?" "Vanilla, chocolate, strawberry," the girl wheezed as she spoke, patted her chest and seemed unable to continue. "Do you have laryngitis?" the young man asked sympathetically. "Nope," she whispered, "just vanilla, chocolate and strawberry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a math trick so unbelievable that it will stump you. Personally I would like to know who came up with this and why that person is not running the country. I wonder what it means... 1. Grab a calculator. (You won''t be able to do this one in your head) 2. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT the area code) 3. Multiply by 80 4. Add 1 5. Multiply by 250 6. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number 7. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number again. 8. Subtract 250 9. Divide number by 2 Do you recognize the answer?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an Italian Cop? Guinea Pig', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American, a Japanese and an Iraqi were walking together. The American put his hand near his mouth and started speaking; after he finished the Iraqi asked him what he was doing, and the American said, "We put microphones in our hands and speakers in our ears so that we can make phone calls without the need to carry a mobile phone." Then the Japanese started talking, and after he finished the Iraqi said to him, "You didn''t put your hand near your mouth, how did you speak?" The Japanese said, "We put the microphones in our teeth so that we can speak hands-free." Then the Iraqi picked up a paper from the ground and swallowed it, and both the American and the Japanese asked him about what he did, and he said, "I sent a fax."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American, a Frenchman and a Chinese went to try their echo; the American said, "Good morning," and the echo came back, "Good morninginginging." Then the Frenchman said, "Bon jour," and the echo came back "Bon jourjourjour." Then the Chinese said, "Chang chiong shang zhang hu," and the echo came back, "Whatwhatwhatwhat?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three people had been sentenced to be put in jail for ten years, and they asked each one of them to say one thing that he wants to have with him in the chamber. The first one said, "I want you to put 1 ton of steak with me," so they did and they locked the chamber; then the second one said, "I want a rack full with the best wines in the world," so they put it in his chamber and locked it; the third said, "I want 1000 packets of cigarettes," so they put it in the chamber and locked it. After the ten years are over, they unlocked the first chamber, and the man came out with big belly and said, "That was delicious." Then they unlocked the second chamber, and the man came out and he can barely stand and said, "Those were the best wines that I have ever tasted." When they opened the third chamber, the man came out and said, "Matches, please"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two robbers from Puerto Rico felt that the police were getting hot on their trail, so they decided to move far away to Montreal and continue their life of crime in the new city. Unfortunately they just did not quite understand winter. They were arrested the morning after their first break-in. The police just followed their footsteps in the snow from the store to their house...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she''d be Yoko Ono Bono. If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she''d be Dolly Dali. If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she''d be Bo Ho. If Ella Fitzgerald married Darth Vader, she''d be Ella Vader. If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she''d be Oprah Chopra. If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, he''d be Cat Doggy Dogg. If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she''d be Olivia Newton-John Newton John. If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she''d become Sondra Locke Ness Munster. If Bea Arthur married Sting, she''d be Bea Sting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where''s the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bush, Chirac and Saddam went to hell. Bush wanted to call the US, so he called for one minute and then asked for the cost and he was told $1,000,000, so he paid. Jacques Chirac wanted to call France so he called for one minute and he asked for the cost and he was told it''s $1,000,000, so he paid. Then Saddam wanted to call Iraq, so he called for ten minutes and he asked for the cost and he was told $10 and he paid it, but Bush and Chirac complained and wanted to know the reason, so the angel told them, "He made a local call."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde wanted to have a copy of herself, so she went to the US, and they asked her for a sample of her blood. They asked her to come back after a week, so she went after a week and she saw a donkey, and they told her that this is her copy. She decided to go to Australia, and when she went there they asked for a sample of her blood, and they asked her to come back after a week. When she went back she saw a donkey, so she went to Japan, and when she told them what happened with her, they asked her to come back after a week. She asked them why they didn''t need a blood sample, and they told her that they don''t need it, so she left. When she came back after a week she saw an exact copy of herself, and when she asked them how they did it, they said, "We took a blood sample from a donkey."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the similarity between girls and tea? They are both hot and with milk. What is the difference between a girl in church and a girl in the bathroom? The girl in church has a soul full with hope and the girl in the bathroom has a hole full with soap. What is the difference between the sky and the skirt? The sky covers the whole universe and the skirt covers the universal hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the difference between a plate and a booger? A: The plate is on the table, but the booger is under the table. Q: What is the difference between a prince and a booger? A: The prince is the heir to the throne, but the booger is thrown to the air.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fire investigators on Maui have determined the cause of a blaze that destroyed a $127,000 home last month - a short in the homeowner''s newly installed fire prevention alarm system. "This is even worse than last year," said the distraught homeowner, "when someone broke in and stole my new security system..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bank robber in Virginia Beach got a nasty surprise when a dye pack designed to mark stolen money exploded in his Fruit-of-the-Looms. The robber apparently stuffed the loot down the front of his pants as he was running out the door. "He was seen hopping and jumping around," said police spokesman Mike Carey, "with an explosion taking place inside his pants." Police have the man''s charred trousers in custody...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everything that can be invented has been invented. - Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('November 15, 1996 - PSA was following United, taxiing out for departure. PSA called the tower and said "Tower, this is United 586. We''ve got a little problem, so go ahead and let PSA go first." The tower promptly cleared PSA for takeoff before United had a chance to object to the impersonation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quotes from Officer Fitness Reports: He has the wisdom of youth, and the energy of old age. He has carried out each and every one of his duties to his entire satisfaction. This Officer reminds me very much of a gyroscope - always spinning around at a frantic pace, but not really going anywhere. When he joined my ship, this Officer was something of a granny; since then he has aged considerably. In my opinion this pilot should not be authorized to fly below 250 feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After preschool the road of life keeps getting bumpier and bumpier and bumpier. Angela Martin, age 11 Never blow in a cat''s ear because if you do, usually after three or four times, they will bite your lips! And they don''t let go for at least a minute. Lisa Coburn, age 9 Don''t think life is easy, because when you get older it is hard work. I used to think life was easy, now I have to do the dishes every other day. Nick Coleman, age 9 Take risks. I mean, if you like this person and you don''t know if they like you, ask them out and see what happens. I liked this girl and I asked her out. She said no and she hates me now, but I took that risk. Bruce Wagner, age 13 A realist is more correct about things in life than an optimist, but the optimist seems to have more friends and much more fun. Megan, age 14', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When they broke open molecules, they found they were only stuffed with atoms, but when they broke open atoms, they found them stuffed with explosions. When people run around and around in circles we say they are crazy. When planets do it we say they are orbiting. Rainbows are just to look at, not to really understand. Someday we may discover how to make magnets that can point in any direction. A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants to go. Many dead animals in the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil. Genetics explain why you look like your father, and if you don''t, why you should. Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know they''re there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette on a river bank sees a blonde on the far shore and yells to her: "How do I get to the other side of the river?" And the blonde yells back "You''re ON the other side."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Saudis emigrated to America with their families. On the plane ride over they made a bet about who could become more "Americanized" in their first year. As agreed, they met exactly one year later. The first guy pulled up in his Hummer and said to the second guy "I win. There''s no way you can beat me: I just dropped my son off at Little League, I''m on my way to pick my daughter up from cheerleading practice, and I stopped at McDonalds on my way here." And the second guy said "Fuck you, towelhead!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Descartes walked into a McDonalds and ordered a veggieburger. The guy behind the counter asked "Do you want fries with that?" Descartes replied "I think not," and poof - he disappeared.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One guy went to see a doctor because he had a hearing problem, so he met his friend and the conversation began! First guy: "Did the doctor give you your test results?" Second guy: "Yeah. Looks like all those years of phone sex caught up with me. I have hearing AIDS."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a fairy called Nuff. Fair enough.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid said to his Dad, "In school I learned Pluto is in outerspace. But they didn''t say where Mickey is."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When she told me I was average, she was just being mean. Editor''s note: Mean can mean both not nice but another definition is average.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to feel like I was a man trapped in a woman''s body, but then I was born.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So this kid has been using lots of his dad''s money and the dad says, "Do you think money grows on trees?" "Ya," says the kid. "Well, it doesn''t," says the dad. "So what is money made out of, Dad?" "Paper," the dad says. "And what is paper made out of?" "Shut up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Kuwait. - A. Whitney Brown "When I was a kid, I had two friends, and they were imaginary and they would only play with each other." - Rita Rudner "I don''t know what''s wrong with my television set. I was getting C-Span and the Home Shopping Network on the same station. I actually bought a congressman." - Bruce Baum "USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population." - David Letterman "If God doesn''t destroy Hollywood Boulevard, he owes Sodom and Gomorrah an apology." - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun. Lead me not into temptation...I can find the way myself. The mind is like a parachute; it works much better when it''s open. Jury: Twelve people who determine which client has the better attorney. Miracles are performed every day, the impossible takes longer. Never knock on Death''s door: ring the doorbell and run (he hates that).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior. - Hippolyte Taine "No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are here to welcome me." - Unknown "There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer "The cat has too much spirit to have no heart." - Ernest Menaul "Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God." "Time spent with cats is never wasted." Colette "You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats." - Colonial American proverb "Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want." -Joseph Wood Krutch', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please don''t tell anyone, this is HOT gossip. After all the years of shit, it''s surprising they are still together! Guess who? THE BUTTOCKS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 26999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cats are smarter than dogs. You can''t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez "Managing senior programmers is like herding cats." - Dave Platt "There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." Unknown "In a cat''s eye, all things belong to cats." - English proverb "As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat." - Ellen Perry Berkeley "One cat just leads to another." - Ernest Hemmingway "Dogs come when they''re called; cats take a message and get back to you later." - Mary Bly "People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life." - Faith Resnick "There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats." Anonymous', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once, Mr. Maggi mee was walking along the streets and noticed Mr. Meatball just a few metres ahead of him. He then went up, gave Mr. Meatball a good beating and left. Mr. Meatball, not wanting to take this insult, gathered all his meatball friends and arranged to meet outside Mr. Maggi mee''s house to seek vengence on the beating. They pressed the bell, and Mr. Spaghetti opened the door. They walloped him and as they did, Mr. Spaghetti asked : why are you guys beating me? Mr. Meatball replied : "Don''t think that just because you had yourself rebonded, we wouldn''t recognise you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a monk, living in a monastery, takes a vow of silence, then talks in his sleep, has he broken his vow of silence? If so, who is going to tell on him?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went to get some paper from the stationery store, but it had moved.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can''t get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote ''thingy,''" she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don''t you drive over there and check about the batteries...it''s a long walk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Years ago when I was working at Customer Service for a gardening company, I came across this tale. It is completely true! A lady came in looking for a soaker hose (a hose that drips water into the soil every few minutes) I helped her find it, but soon, she came back with a complaint. "What''s the problem," I asked. "It leaks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde phoned police to report that thieves had been in her car. "They''ve stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator," she cried out. However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "Never mind, I got in the back seat by mistake."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A terrible diet and room with no ventilation are being blamed for the death of a man who was killed by his own gas. There was no mark on his body but autopsy showed large amounts of methane gas in his system. His diet had consisted primarily of beans and cabbage(and a couple of other things). It was just the right combination of foods. It appears that the man died in his sleep from breathing the poisonous cloud that was hanging over his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been opened, it wouldn''t have been fatal. But the man was shut, up in his, near airtight bedroom. According to the article, "He was a big man with a huge capacity for creating ''this deadly gas''." Three of the rescuers got sick and one was hospitalized.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to "The Australian," an airliner recently encountered severe vibration in flight. The captain decided to make an emergency landing, and switched on the seat belt sign. The vibration stopped immediately. A passenger emerged from a lavatory and explained that he had been jogging in place inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on end. Finally she couldn''t take it any longer, and told him, "Listen, it means nothing, they even have a Vice President of peas at the grocery store!" "Really?" he said. Not sure if this was true or not, Tom decided to call the grocery store. A clerk answers and Tom says, "Can I please talk to the Vice President of peas?" The clerk replies, "Canned or frozen?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to inside contacts, the Japanese banking crisis shows no signs of ameliorating. If anything, it''s getting worse. Following last week''s news that Origami Bank had folded, we are hearing that Sumo Bank has gone belly up, and Bonsai Bank plans to cut back some of its branches. Karaoke Bank is up for sale, and is going for a song. Meanwhile, shares in Kamikaze Bank have nose-dived, and 500 back-office staff at Karate Bank got the chop. Analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank, and staff there fear they may get a raw deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the USA they go ice skating. In Canada we go skating; we just assume it will be on ice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tommy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I''ve got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there''s somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there''s somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under. You gotta help me, I''m going crazy!" "Just put yourself in my hands for two years," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I''ll cure your fears." "How much do you charge?" "A hundred dollars per visit." "I''ll sleep on it," said Tommy. Six months later the doctor met Tommy on the street. "Why didn''t you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist. "For a hundred bucks a visit? A bartender cured me for ten dollars." "Is that so! How?" "He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a definition of a " suicide bomber"? Answer: "martyr-dumb"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Room service? Send up a larger room. Who are you going to believe; me, or your own eyes? A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five. I never forget a face, but in your case I''ll be glad to make an exception. One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I''ll never know. I must say that I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library and read a book. I don''t care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher - "Didn''t you promise to behave?" Johnny - "Yes, sir." Teacher - "And didn''t I promise to punish you if you misbehaved?" Johnny - "Yes, sir, but since I broke my promise, you don''t have to keep yours." Teacher - "How can one person make so many mistakes in one day?" Johnny - "I get up early." Teacher - "Well, at least there''s one thing I can say about your son." Father - "What''s that?" Teacher - "With grades like these, he couldn''t be cheating."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a little girl climbed onto Santa''s lap, Santa asked the usual, "And what would you like for Christmas?" The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a moment, then gasped - "Didn''t you get my E-mail?" A 7-year old child was drawing a picture of the Nativity. The picture was very good, including Mary, Joseph, and of course baby Jesus. However, there was a fat man standing in the corner of the stable that just did not seem to fit in. When the child was asked about it, she replied, "Oh, that''s Round John Virgin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman was walking the beat when suddenly he saw a large black man pummeling a small jewish man as he pinned him to the concrete. The policeman quickly rushed in to break up the scuffle. He asked the black man what was going on and why he was beating the helpless man. The black man responded "He called me a black bastard!" The policeman looked down to the beaten jewish man and asked. "Is it true? Did you call this man a black bastard?" The jewish man looked at the policeman and said "No! The gentleman asked me where the store was and I told him he was a block past it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My bedroom is so small... The mice are hunchbacked. I shut the door and and the doorknob was in bed with me. I have to go outside to change my mind. If I stand up, I''m on the second floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A three-year old put his shoes on by himself. His mother noticed that the left was on the right and the right was on the left. She said, "Paul, your shoes are on the wrong feet." He looked up at her and said, "No they''re not, Mom. I KNOW they''re my feet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So there was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead and they were running from the police but all they could find was a barn. They were in a hurry to hide so the brunette hid in the horse''s stable, the redhead hid in a tree, and the blonde hid behind a few boxes of oranges. When the policemen came to the barn, they went to the horses stable and the policeman heard something. "Wait!" he said. "I hear breathing!" But the brunette went, "Neigh! Neigh!" "Oh, it''s just a horse," the policeman said. Then he walked around and came upon a tree and heard breathing. "Stop!" he said. "I hear breathing in the tree!" "Caww! Caww!" went the redhead. "Oh,it''s just a bird," said the policeman. Next, the policemen came upon a barn with a stack of boxes of oranges. "Wait!" Said the policeman. "I hear breathing!" Then the blonde said "I''m an orange! I''m an orange!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s There Hatch Hatch Who? God Bless You.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is explaining Biology to her 4th grade students, "Human beings are the only animals that stutter," she says. A little girl raises her hand, "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered," she volunteered. The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident. "Well," she began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty and the rottweiler who lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!" "That must have been scary," said the teacher. "It sure was,"said the little girl. "My kitty went ''Fffff, Fffff, Fffff''... and before he could say ''F*ck,'' the rottweiler ate him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 guys are sitting at a bar after a hard days work and start talking about their wives. 1st guy: "You know what, my wife is an angel." 2nd guy: "Gee, you sure are lucky, my wife is still alive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Aesop Aesop who? Aesop I saw a Putty Cat, I did I did!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I was growing up I never bothered to learn French. So I tried very hard to avoid French in general, since I didn''t know any of it. It was very hard to avoid... ...since my family spoke french...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A really huge muscular guy with a bad stutter goes to a counter in a department store and asks, "W-w-w-where''s the m-m-m-men''s dep-p-p-partment?" The clerk behind the counter just looks at him and says nothing. The man repeats himself: "W-w-w-where''s the m-m-m-men''s dep-p-p-partment?" Again, the clerk doesn''t answer him. The guy asks several more times: "W-w-w-where''s the m-m-m-men''s dep-p-p-partment?" And the clerk just seems to ignore him. Finally, the guy storms off in anger. The customer who was waiting in line behind the guy asks the clerk, "Why wouldn''t you answer that guy''s question?" The clerk answers, "D-d-d-do you th-th-th-think I w-w-w-want to get b-b-b-beat up?!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady standing at the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her hair smells nice. After a week of this, she can''t stand it any more, takes her complaint to a supervisor in the personnel department and states that she wants to write a sexual harassment grievance against him. The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled by this decision and asks,"What''s sexually threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?" The woman replies,"It''s Keith, the midget."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 2nd grade teacher decides to teach sex education to her class. She starts out by drawing a penis on the chalk board and asks the class, "Does anyone know what this is?" Little Johnny says, "Yes, my dad has 2 of them!" Teacher, "Are you sure about that?" Little Johnny, "Yes, he uses the small skinny one to go to the bathroom, and the big long one to brush the baby-sitter''s teeth."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so Dumb she put training wheels on your tricycle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the ugliest member of wocka? [Name Removed - This joke offends some users - Joke awaiting deletion]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My geometry tutor told me, "A six-sided polygon is called a hexagon, a five-sided one is called a pentagon." "What about two sided ones?" I asked. "They don''t exist," was his response. "I beg to differ! I think we should just let bi-gons be bi-gons."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Veni, Vedi, Visa: I came, I saw, I did a little shopping. Gravity...it''s not just a good Idea, it''s the Law. First things first, but not necessarily in that order. My mother is a travel agent for guilt trips. Measure wealth not by the things you have, but by the things you have for which you would not take money. Look out for #1. Don''t step in #2 either. AAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse. Am I ignorant or apathetic? I don''t know and don''t care! Can you repeat the part after, "Listen very carefully"? Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dyslexia: it can warn without striking! Give and you might receive. Take and be sure of it. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I''m not so sure. I''m in a phone booth at the corner of Walk and Don''t Walk. Jealousy is all the fun you think they have. Originality is the art of concealing your source. Synonym: word used when you can''t spell the one you wanted. The Apathy Anonymous meeting was canceled due to lack of interest. You can tell a real programmer by the keyboard-shaped dents in his forehead. You have mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you are a redneck when you do not speak your first word until your 18th birthday and that word is WELFARE!.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do Gynecologists retire at a younger age that other doctors? They get tunnel vision!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so old, if she''s not wearing a bra, it looks like she has four legs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat she sat on Bigfoot and turned him into "Little Toe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was working in a scrap yard during summer vacation at an engineering university. I used to work repairing construction equipment. One afternoon, I was taking apart a piling hammer that had some very large bolts holding it together. One of the nuts had corroded on to the bolt; to free it, I started heating the nut with an oxy-acetylene torch. As I was doing this, one of the dimmest apprentices I have ever known came along. He asked me what I was doing. I patiently explained that if I heated the nut, it would grow larger and release its grip on the bolt so I could then remove it. "So things get larger when they get hot, do they?" he asked. Suddenly, an idea flashed into my mind (I know not from where.) "Yes," I said, "that''s why days are longer in summer and shorter in winter." There was a long pause, then his face cleared and he said, "You know, I always wondered about that."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were two guys from Alabama who love to fish, and they wanted to try some ice fishing. They''d heard about it up in Canada, and they took off for up there. The lakes were frozen nicely. They stopped just before they got to a lake at a little bait shop and got all their tackle. One of them said, "We''re going to need an ice pick." So they got that, and they took off. In about two hours, one of them was back at the shop and said, "We''re going to need another dozen ice picks." Well, the fellow in the shop wanted to ask some questions, but he didn''t. He sold him the picks, and the the guy left. In about an hour, he was back. "We''re going to need all the ice picks you''ve got." The bait man couldn''t stand it any longer. "By the way," he asked, "how are you fellows doing?" "Not very well at all," he said. "We don''t even have the boat in the water yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience. I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and spreasheet progroms. I am loyal to my employer at all costs.Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail. Reason for leaving last job: They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 am every day. I couldn''t work under those conditions. Failed bar exam with relatively high grades. My goal is to be a meteorologist, but since I possess no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage. As indicted, I have over five years of analyzing investments. Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store. The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous employers. I am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season..."I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first." Shaquille O''Neal, on his lack of championships: "I''ve won at every level, except college and pro." Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: "My sister''s expecting a baby, and I don''t know if I''m going to be an uncle or an aunt." Steve Spurrier, Florida football coach, telling Gator fans that a fire at Auburn''s football dorm had destroyed 20 books: "But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn''t been colored yet." Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings." Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F''s and one D: "Son, looks to me like you''re spending too much time on one subject."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. "You don''t want to try these techniques at home." "Why not?" asked someone from the back of the audience. "I watched my wife''s routine at breakfast for years," the expert explained. "She made lots of trips to the refrigerator, stove, table and cabinets, often carrying just a single item at a time. ''Hon,'' I suggested, ''Why don''t you try carrying several things at once?''" The voice from the back asked, "Did it save time?" The expert replied, "Actually, yes. It used to take her 20 minutes to get breakfast ready. Now I do it in seven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That I would never watch the news, and I would be totally out of touch with the world happenings. That if you wear polyester everyone will ask why you are so dressed up. That I could change so much and barely realize it. That college kids throw airplanes too. That you can know everything and fail a test. That you can know nothing and ace a test. (I know a bunch of us are testimony to this one!) That my parents would become so much smarter in the last few years. That I would become one of those people that my parents warned me about. That the more money your parents give you, the less you have every time you check your account!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day an immigrant from Poland entered a New York City Police Precinct to report that his American wife was planning to kill him. The police officer on duty was intrigued by this, and he asked, "How sure are ya that she is gonna kill ya? Did she threaten to kill ya?" "No," replied the nervous immigrant. "Did ya hear her tell someone else that she''s gonna kill ya?" "No." "Did someone tell ya that your wife is gonna kill ya?" "No." "Then why in God''s name did ya think she''s gonna kill ya?" asked the exasperated police officer. "Because I found bottle on dresser and I think she gonna poison me!" He handed the police officer the suspect bottle. The police officer took one look at the label on the bottle and started to laugh out loud. The immigrant became indignant and said, "What''s so funny? Can''t you see the label on bottle says ''Polish Remover''?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honeywell & Imasco & Home Oil = Honey, I''m Home. Denison Mines & Alliance & Metal Mining = Mine, All Mine. 3M & JC Penney & Canadian Opera Company = 3 Penney Opera. Crabtree & Evelyn and Apple Computer = Crab Apple. Swissair & Cheseborough-Ponds = Swisscheese. John Deere & Abitibi-Price = Deere Abi. And don''t forget the failed merger between Yahoo and Netscape: Net''n''Yahoo. It didn''t work out because they were afraid they would have to relocate the headquarters to Tel Aviv.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day two robins walked along the road, planning their day. Robin #1:Oh my god, we totally have to get some bronzing oil! Robin #2:Duh, I mean if are going to spend the whole day at the beach we totally have to! That day while the robins were tanning on the beach a big bad fox came along. He took one look at them and said: Fox:Mmmm, I love Baskin'' Robins!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s okay to kiss a fool, and it''s also okay to let a fool kiss you. But NEVER let a kiss fool you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who tows the tow trucks when they break down?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (NULL, '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our old friend Gladys attended church services one particular Sunday. The sermon seemed to go on forever, and many in the congregation fell asleep. After the service, to be social, she walked up to a very sleepy looking gentleman, in an attempt to revive him from his stupor, extended her hand in greeting, and said, "Hello, I''m Gladys Dunn," to which the gentleman replied, "You''re not the only one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The young couple invited their aged parson for Sunday dinner. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked their son what they were having. "Goat," the little boy replied. "Goat?" replied the startled man of the cloth, "Are you sure about that?" "Yep," said the youngster. "I heard Pa say to Ma, ''Might as well have the old goat for dinner today as any other day.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are part-time band leaders semiconductors? If athletes get athlete''s foot, do astronauts get mistletoe? Does killing time damage eternity? Daylight savings time - why are they saving it and where do they keep it? Do pilots in a hurry take crash-courses? How do you get off a nonstop flight?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Iraqi Head Found With Arms 2. Man Loses Toes in Snow, but Timesheet Submitted 3. Crack found on Governor''s Daughter 4. Miners Refuse To Work After Death 5. Eight Arms Found In Octopus', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('LITTLE MISS MUFFET''S MOTHER: "Well, all I''ve got to say is if you don''t get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room, there''ll be a lot more spiders around here!" ALBERT EINSTEIN''S MOTHER: "But, Albert, it''s your senior picture. Can''t you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something...?" GEORGE WASHINGTON''S MOTHER: "The next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!" JONAH''S MOTHER: "That''s a nice story, but now tell me where you''ve really been for the last three days." SUPERMAN''S MOTHER: "Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we''ve decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending so much time in all those phone booths?" THOMAS EDISON''S MOTHER: "Of course I''m proud that you invented the electric light bulb, Thomas. Now turn off that light and get to bed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('PAUL REVERE''S MOTHER: "I don''t care where you think you have to go, young man. Midnight is past your curfew!" MARY, MARY, QUITE CONTRARY''S MOTHER: "I don''t mind you having a garden, Mary, but does it have to be growing under your bed?" MONA LISA''S MOTHER: "After all that money your father and I spent on braces, Mona, that''s the biggest smile you can give us?" HUMPTY DUMPTY''S MOTHER: "Humpty, If I''ve told you once, I''ve told you a hundred times not to sit on that wall. But would you listen to me? Noooo!" COLUMBUS'' MOTHER: "I don''t care what you''ve discovered, Christopher. You still could have written!" BABE RUTH''S MOTHER: "Babe, how many times have I told you - quit playing ball in the house! That''s the third broken window this week!" MICHELANGELO''S MOTHER: "Mike, can''t you paint on walls like other children? Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NAPOLEON''S MOTHER: "All right, Napoleon. If you aren''t hiding your report card inside your jacket, then take your hand out of there and prove it!" CUSTER''S MOTHER: "Now, George, remember what I told you - don''t go biting off more than you can chew!" ABRAHAM LINCOLN''S MOTHER: "Again with the stovepipe hat, Abe? Can''t you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?" BARNEY''S MOTHER: "I realize strained plums are your favorite, Barney, but you''re starting to look a little purple." MARY''S MOTHER: "I''m not upset that your lamb followed you to school, Mary, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you." BATMAN''S MOTHER: "It''s a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the insurance is going to be?" GOLDILOCKS'' MOTHER: "I''ve got a bill here for a busted chair from the Bear family. You know anything about this, Goldie?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In his legal practice, Abraham Lincoln was never greedy for fees and discouraged unnecessary litigation. A man came to him in a passion, asking him to bring a suit for $2.50 against an impoverished debtor. Lincoln tried to dissuade him, but the man was determined upon revenge. When he saw that the creditor was not to be put off, Lincoln asked for and got $10 as his legal fee. He gave half of this to the defendant, who thereupon willingly confessed to the debt and paid up the $2.50, thus settling the matter to the entire satisfaction of the irate plaintiff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, a barber found two MIT students wanting to buy his barber pole. They offered a good price for it, so the barber sold it to them. So - these two guys drove around all day in a pickup truck carrying the barber pole. They kept getting stopped by the police, who were sure they had stolen the pole. But each time, the students referred back to the barber they had bought the pole from. So finally, an APB went out all over Boston, saying that if police saw two students driving around with a barber pole, they should leave them alone. The next day, every single barber pole in Boston was missing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In my college dorm we had one of those irritating type guys who was born with more money than most of us could ever dream of earning, and naturally we resented his Porsche, his boat, and the women who hung all over same. The guy went out of his way to remind us all about his money, car, and especially the women. Most of us were 2 and 3 to a dorm room, but he had a room all to himself at the end of the hall in the dorm. So........ when he took off for an extended weekend, a bunch of us theatre department freaks went to his door, removed the doorknob, plastered over the entire wall at the end of the hall, nailed up new wood molding, painted the entire hallway a new color and changed all the remaining door numbers. When our "target" returned, his room had simply vanished!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pythagorean Theorem - 24 words. Lord''s Prayer - 66 words. Archimedes'' Principle - 67 words. 10 Commandments - 179 words. Gettysburg Address - 286 words. Declaration of Independence - 1,300 words. US Government regulations on the sale of cabbage - 26,911 words.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of Morris, one of the older workmen. After several minutes, Morris had enough. "Why don''t you put your money where your mouth is?" he said. "I will bet a week''s wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that building that you won''t be able to wheel back." "You''re on, old man," the braggart replied. "It''s a bet! Let''s see what you''ve got." Morris reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles, then, nodding to the young man, he said, "All right. Get in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Signs That Were Found In Peoples'' Kitchens: A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen, and this kitchen is delirious. No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes. A husband is someone who takes out the trash and gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator. A clean house is a sign of a misspent life. Help keep the kitchen clean - eat out. Housework done properly can kill you. Countless number of people have eaten in this kitchen and gone on to lead normal lives.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recent survey shows that 95% of men admit to pleasuring themselves sexually... and that the remaining 5% are liars!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a golf ball and a woman''s G-spot? A man will spend 20 minutes looking for a golf ball!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Susie was watching her father, a pastor, write a sermon. "How do you know what to say?" she asked. "Why, God tells me." "Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a question in our company newsletter asking about whether they could water the flowers in the bathroom since they were looking wilted and sick. The response was, "The flowers are artificial." [Editor''s note: Evidently some employees created a rest room gas cloud powerful enough to wilt artificial plants. You have to admire that on some level]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy was an inveterate drunkard. The parish priest ran into him one day totally inebriated, attempting to stumble home, and gave him a strong lecture against drinking. The good father was able to convince Paddy that, "If you continue drinking as you do, you''ll gradually get smaller and smaller, and eventually you''ll turn into a mouse." This frightened the life out of Paddy. He went home that night, and could not get that thought out of his mind. He couldn''t sleep for a week worrying about the priest''s threat and finally said to his wife, "Bridget....if you should notice me getting smaller and smaller, will ye kill that blasted cat?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister''s house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store. When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen,and inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven. When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird. With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Patricia, you''ve cooked a pregnant bird!" At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs! Yep.................SHE''S BLONDE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. CADDY -- 2 women talking about a 3rd who isn''t there to defend herself. 2. CHIPPING -- Time to get our nails done again. 3. DOUBLE BOGIE -- "Casablanca" followed by "African Queen." 4. FAIRWAY -- Splitting the bill when the girls go to lunch. 5. GOOD LIE -- Weight on our driver''s license. 6. GREENS -- Lunch we eat when we''d really love a cheeseburger. 7. HOLE-IN-ONE -- Time to get new pantyhose. 8. IRON -- What guys need to learn to do their own shirts. 9. ROUGH -- Getting a guy to understand, well, pretty much anything. 10. SHAFT -- You watch the kids while he gets to go golfing. 11. SLICE -- "No thanks. . .just a sliver." 12. TEES -- Putting on that Victoria Secret Negligee. 13. WATER HAZARD -- Giving the kids too much to drink before a road trip. 14. WEDGE -- Bathing suit that''s too tight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Smiths were proud of their family tradition. Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower and the family included Senators and Wall Street Wizards. The family decided to compile a family history, a legacy for their children and grandchildren. So the family hired a fine author to put together all their research notes, only a problem arose - how to handle Great Uncle George, who was executed in the electric chair. The author said not to worry, for he could handle the story tactfully. So the book appeared and it said... "Great Uncle George occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution. He was attached to his position by the strongest of ties, and his death came as a great shock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Operator? I''d like the number of the Scottish knitwear company in Woven. "I can''t find a town called ''Woven''? Are you sure?" "Yes. That''s what it says on the label - ''Woven in Scotland''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson, who is coming to visit with his wife: "You come to the front door of the apartment complex. I am in apartment 14T. There is a big panel at the door. With your elbow, push button 14T. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, hit 14. When you get out I am on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell." "Grandma, that sounds easy, but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?" "You''re coming empty handed?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A well-respected surgeon was relaxing on his sofa one evening just after arriving home from work. As he was tuning into the evening news, the phone rang. The doctor calmly answered it and heard the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line. "We need a fourth for poker," said the friend. "I''ll be right over," whispered the doctor. As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, "Is it serious?" "Oh yes, quite serious," said the doctor gravely. "In fact, three doctors are there already!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Real friends are those who, when you think you''ve made a fool of yourself, don''t feel you''ve done a permanent job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Transportation in the Middle Ages by Orson Cart. "Growing up in the Balkans" by Hugo Slavia. "The Outboard Motor Died" by Rhoda Shaw. "Answering the Questions of the Universe" by Howard I. Know. "Our Son, Russell, the Chef" by Mr. & Mrs. Upsumgrub. "How to Write a Mystery Novel" by Paige Turner. "The Great English Breakfast" by Chris P. Bacon. "Vacation Spots in the Tropics" by Sandy Beech.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Willy was a chemist; Little Willy is no more - For what he thought was H2O, Was H2SO4. Little Willy played with dynamite, Couldn''t understand it quite. Curiosity never pays, It rained Willy seven days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ben and Zero are talking when Ben says, "Hey, Zero, if you can tear this piece of paper in half, I''ll give you a quarter." Zero then proceeds to tear the paper in half. Ben takes one of the halves, tears it in half, and gives it to Zero, saying, "Here''s your quarter!" Zero wanders off, saying how neat that is and wouldn''t it be great to find someone else to pull this on. He meets Tommy, and says, "If you can tear this piece of paper in half, I''ll give you 25 cents..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you help a friend in need, he is sure to remember you -the next time he''s in need.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy is adopted from Korea and is flown to the USA to meet his new parents. A few years later the parents decide to adopt again on the way to the airport the little boy sees planes coming in to land. He says to his mother, "Look at all the babies being born." (he thinks all babies come on air planes Ha Ha)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man decides to take the opportunity while his wife is away to paint the wooden toilet seat. The wife comes home sooner than expected, sits, and gets the seat stuck to her rear. She is understandably distraught about this and asks her husband to drive her to the doctor. She puts on a large overcoat so as to cover the stuck seat, and they go. When they get to the doctor''s, the man lifts his wife''s coat to show their predicament. The man asks, "Doctor, have you ever seen anything like this before?" "Well, yes," the doctor replies, "but never framed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seen on rear mud-flaps of a large truck left mud-flap right mud-flap Passing Side Suicide / ------ ------ \ \ ------ ------ / El Paso El Cruncho', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A large two-engined train was crossing America. After they had gone some distance, one of the engines broke down. "No problem," the engineer thought, and carried on at half power. Farther on down the line, the other engine broke down, and the train came to a standstill. The engineer decided he should inform the passengers about why the train had stopped, and made the following announcement: "Ladies and gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that both engines have failed, and we will be stuck here for some time. The good news is that you decided to take the train and not fly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A car was involved in an accident in a street. As expected, a large crowd gathered. A newspaper reporter, anxious to get his story, could not get near the car. Being a clever sort, he started shouting loudly, "Let me through! Let me through! I am the son of the victim." The crowd made way for him. Lying in front of the car was a donkey.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fisherman returned to shore with a giant marlin that was bigger and heavier than he. On the way to the cleaning shed, he met a second fisherman who had a stringer with a dozen baby minnows. The second fisherman looked at the marlin, turned to the first fisherman and said, "Only caught one, eh?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After interviewing a particularly short-spoken job candidate, the interviewer described the person to his boss as rather monosyllabic. The boss said, "Really? Where is Monosyllabia?" Thinking that his boss was just kidding, he played along and said that it was just south of Elbonia. He replied, "Oh, you mean over by Croatia?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('El Nino storms are affecting trade with Asian countries. A freighter bound for Long Beach Calif. with a cargo of yo-yos got caught in a particularly violent storm and sank 65 times.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When asked for her occupation, a woman charged with a traffic violation said she was a schoolteacher. The judge was delighted. "Madam, I have waited years for a schoolteacher to appear before this court. Now please sit down at that table and write ''I will not pass through a red light'' five hundred times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A truck driver was going south on I-75, when he came upon a weight station. When he pulled in and got on the scales to be weighed, the scale master told the driver that he was 900lbs. over weight. The truck driver replied, "I can take care or that." The scale master asked he how could he fix the problem? The driver said, "Let me go around back, and I''ll fix the overweight problem." The scale master agreed to let him fix his problem. About half an hour later the truck driver got back on the scales, and the scale master said, "Driver, you are still 900lbs. over weight." The truck driver said, "I don''t understand what went wrong. I let 50lbs. out of each tire on the rig." After thinking the problem over the scale master said, "Well, 18 tires times 50lbs. would equal 900lbs. I guess my scales must be wrong. I''m sorry driver, you may continue on down the road, and have a nice day."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes. Their Disney password was "GoofyMickeyMinniePluto" and I asked why it was so long. "Because," my son explained, "they said it had to have at least four characters."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I joined a health club last year, spent about $400, and haven''t lost a pound. Apparently, you have to show up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you ever watch the Food Network? Ya, they cook stuff that you won''t even think about cooking, and afterwards you don''t even bother to even remember it. People just sit at home and drool... It''s like porno for fat people.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do cats raise their tails when you stroke their backs? To let you know you''ve reached the end of the cat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a very smart horse. Anything that was shown him, he mastered easily, until one day, his teachers tried to teach him about rectangular coordinates and he couldn''t understand them. All the horse''s acquaintances and friends tried to figure out what was the matter and couldn''t. Then a new guy looked at the problem and said, "Of course he can''t do it. Why, you''re putting Descartes before the horse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fe Fe Fe \ | / Fe --*-- Fe / | \ Fe Fe Fe A ferris wheel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears and she answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear." "Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But... what happened to your other ear?" "The son of a bitch called back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Of a swimmer Saw four sharks, Off the coast. Three he missed, One almost. Tight Rope Walker Used no net, Knew no fear. Made mis-step, Wound up here. Novice farmer Here lies Clyde, Whose life was full. Until he tried, To milk a bull.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde bought a new car that has a computer which can fix the car when anything happens. So she went and blew the engine and the computer said, "In the name of the manufacturer, get fixed," and it was fixed. Then she broke the window and the computer said, "In the name of the manufacturer, get fixed," and it was fixed. Then she said to herself "It''s time for the ultimate test," and she jumped from the bridge and the computer said, "In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JCPenny blowdryer: do not use while sleeping ********** caution: hot chocolate may be hot **********', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Love thy neighbor all through the day... but first make sure his wife''s away! Boyfriend: I''m going to buy us some condoms. Girlfriend: Why? You can''t fit all that in one! Boyfriend: You barely fit in a bra! Want to hear two short jokes and a long joke? A 2-year old boy, a 12-year old boy, and a 26-year old boy. Do you know which one I want to have? The 26-year old for nothing but length.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three mice were sitting in a bar talking about how tough they were. The first mouse slams a shot and says, "I play with mouse traps for fun. I''ll run into one on purpose and as it is closing on me, I grab the bar and bench press it twenty or thirty times." And with that he slams another shot. The second mouse slams a shot and says, "That''s nothing. I take those Decon tablets, cut them up and snort them just for the fun of it." And with that he slams another shot. The third mouse slams a shot, gets up and walks away. The first two mice look at each other, and then turn to the third mouse and ask, "Where the hell are you going?" The third mouse stops and replies, "I''m going home to fuck the cat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. With all the technology that they have, its a wonder that they still use lightbulbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pro football team had just finished their daily practice session when a large turkey came strutting onto the field. While the players gazed in amazement, the turkey walked up to the head coach and demanded a tryout. Everyone stared in silence as the turkey caught pass after pass and ran right through the defensive line. When the turkey returned to the sidelines, the coach shouted, "You''re terrific!!! Sign up for the season, and I''ll see to it that you get a huge bonus." "Forget the bonus," the turkey said, "All I want to know is, does the season go past Thanksgiving Day?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young couple with a box of condoms proceeded to burn some rubber. When they were finished, she discovered that there were only six condoms remaining in the box of 12, so she asked him, "What happened to the other five condoms?" His nervous reply was, "Er, I masturbated with them." Later, she then approached her male confidant friend, told him the story, and then asked him, "Have you ever done that?" "Yeah, once or twice," he told her. "You mean you''ve actually masturbated with a condom before?" she asked. "Oh," he said, "I thought you were asking if I''d ever lied to my girlfriend."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A car breaks down along the highway one day, so the driver eases it over onto the shoulder. He jumps out of the car, opens the trunk, and pulls out two men in long black trench coats. The men stand behind the car, open up their coats and start exposing themselves to all the oncoming traffic. This results in one of the worst pile-ups. When the police questioned him why he put two deviates along the side of the road, the man replied, "I broke down and was just using my emergency flashers!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kids were bragging about the toys they owned. One of them said, "This is Action Man! He''s been in Viet Nam, Operation Desert Storm, Iraq - and the vacuum cleaner twice!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she needs a boomerang to put on her belt', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two lawyers are leaving the office. "I can''t wait to get home," says one of them. "As soon as I walk in the door, I''m going to rip my wife''s panties right off." "I know the feeling," the other says. "No, I''m serious," says the first. "They''re killing me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma smells so bad that she made an onion cry!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Perhaps you''ve heard of the man who thought he was dead? In reality he was very much alive. His delusion became such a problem that his family finally paid for him to see a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist spent many laborious sessions trying to convince the man he was still alive. Nothing seemed to work. Finally the doctor tried one last approach. He took out his medical books and proceeded to show the patient that dead men don''t bleed. After hours of tedious study, the patient seemed convinced that dead men don''t bleed. "Do you now agree that dead men don''t bleed?" the doctor asked. "Yes, I do," the patient replied. "Very well, then," the doctor said. He took out a pin and pricked the patient''s finger. Out came a trickle of blood. The doctor asked, "What does that tell you?" "Oh my goodness!" the patient exclaimed as he stared incredulously at his finger ... "Dead men do bleed!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Bobby had been searching through a stationer''s stock of greeting cards for some time when a clerk asked, "Just what is it you''re looking for? A birthday greeting, message to a sick friend? An anniversary, or a congratulations to your mom and dad?" Little Bobby shook his head and answered, "No. Er...got any blank report cards?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do u call 1 Paki on the moon? Answer: A problem What do u call 10 Paki''s on the moon? Answer: A problem What do u call 100 Paki''s on the moon? Answer: A problem What do u call all the Paki''s on the moon? Answer: Problem solved', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man died and went to heaven, he went to the golden gates, and saw God. He didn''t know who God was, so he took one look and said, "My god, Who the hell are you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. See and Mr. Soar were old friends. See owned a saw and Soar owned a seesaw. Now See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw before Soar saw See, which made Soar sore. Had Soar seen See''s saw before See saw Soar''s seesaw, then See''s saw would not have sawed Soar''s seesaw. But See saw Soar and Soar''s seesaw before Soar saw See''s saw, so See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw. It was a shame to let See see Soar so sore just because See''s saw sawed Soar''s seesaw!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One summer day a man came home early from work and was greeted by his wife dressed in very sexy lingerie and heels. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So, he tied her up and went golfing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A ninety-year-old man living in a rest home was granted a weekend pass. He stopped in his favorite bar, sat at the end, and ordered a drink. He noticed a seventy-year-old woman at the other end of the bar, and told the bartender to buy the lovely young lady a drink. As the evening progressed, the old man joined the lady, and they went to her apartment, where they got stinky and wrinkly. Four days later, the old man noticed that he had developed a drip, and headed to the rest home doctor. After careful examination the doctor asked the old man if he had engaged in sex recently. The old man said, "Sure!" The doctor asked if he could remember who the woman was and where she lived. "Sure, why?" asked the old man. "Well you''d better get over there," replied the doctor, "You''re about to come!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy asks a young blonde woman he''s just slept with, "Am I the first guy you ever made love to?" The blonde ashes out her cigarette and replies, "You might be. Your face looks familiar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes into Wal-Mart and tells the clerk she wants a refund for the toaster she bought because it doesn''t work. The clerk tells her that he can''t give her a refund because she bought it on special. All of a sudden, the woman throws her arms up in the air and starts screaming! "GRAB MY BREASTS! GRAB MY BREASTS!" The clerk, not knowing what to do, runs to get the store manager. The manager comes up to the Woman and asks, "What''s wrong?" She explains the situation with the toaster. He tells her that he can''t give her a refund because she bought it on special. Once again, the woman throws her arms up in the air and starts screaming, "GRAB MY BREASTS! GRAB MY BREASTS!" In shock, the store manager pleads, "Ma''am, why are you saying that?" In a huff, the woman says, "BECAUSE, I LIKE TO HAVE MY BREASTS GRABBED WHEN I''M GETTING SCREWED!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the zoo a little girl sees two monkeys having sex. Her mom hurriedly explains, "Oh...they''re just baking cakes." The next morning the little girl says, "Mommy, Mommy, you and Daddy baked cakes last night!" "Um, what makes you think that?" the mother asks nervously. "Because this morning there was icing all over the couch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have not been to confession for six months. On top of that, I''ve been with a loose woman. The priest sighs. "Is that you, little Tommy O''Shaughnessy?" "Yes, Father, ''tis I." "And who might be the woman you were with?" "I shan''t be tellin'' you, Father. It would ruin her reputation." "Well, Tommy, I''m bound to find out sooner or later, so you may as well tell me now. Was it Brenda O''Malley?" "I cannot say." "Was it Patricia Fitzgerald?" "I''ll never tell." "Was it Lisa O''Shanter?" "I''m sorry, but I''ll not name her." "Was it Cathy O''Dell?" "My lips are sealed." "Was it Fiona Mallory, then?" "Please, Father, I cannot tell you." The priest sighs in frustration. "You''re a steadfast lad, Tommy O'' Shaughnessy, and I admire that. But you''ve sinned, and you must atone. Be off with you now." Tommy walks back to his pew. His friend Sean slides over and whispers, "What''d you get?" "Five more good leads!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cock-a-doodle-doo, it''s time for chicken, Cock-a-doodle-doo, it''s time for a feast, Eat a ninety-piece bucket then you can tell, He''s been to Cluckin'' Bell! Chicken is a bird with a tiny brain, So we assume he doesn''t feel any pain. We shrink their heads and we breed ''em fast; Six wings, forty breasts and then they''re gassed. Cock-a-doodle-doo we''re psychotic crazies, Cock-a-doodle-doo factory farming''s insane. We denied it all before our stock price fell, Come down to Cluckin'' Bell!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My American History teacher was giving a lecture about the first three presidents. A lot of people in my class can''t remember presidents very well. "You all are brainwashed," he said. Of course, there was confusion in the room at this comment. "Let me demonstrate," he continued, "''I''m Cuckoo for...''" "Cocoa Puffs!" the class replied. "You don''t know the ninth president of the United States, but you know that you are ''Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.''" Then, this one guy in my class said, "If the presidents were finger-lickin'' good, we''d remember ''em."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bag of Cheetos has a contest. It says "No Purchase neccesary" but the code is on the inside...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Discovering too late that a watermelon spiked with vodka had accidentally been served to a luncheon meeting of local ministers, the restaurant''s owner waited nervously for the clerics'' reaction. "Quick, man," he whispered to the waiter, "what did they say?" "Nothing," replied the waiter. "They were all too busy slipping the seeds into their pockets."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was out camping and my glasses had broken the day before, so I couldn''t wear them. Without my glasses, I can''t see anything past 10 feet in front of my face. So I was out camping (W/out glasses) and I go to use the bathroom, and I walk into the wrong one, (and two cute girls were outside picking berries) and I come out and they start to laugh. I found out about two hours later that I walked into the wrong bathroom. An hour and a half later, i was eating a late lunch/early dinner, and I go to use the bathroom, at this local Texmex resturant, and the bathroom was outside, and I walked into the wrong one again. It was really embarrassing. PS, I''m not blonde, just on the inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once an old woman living in a cottage. Her husband had died three years ago. Suddenly, the phone rang. She picked it up and a deep voice boomed: "I am the vindow viper and I''m coming into your town." She put the phone down, thinking it was some boys playing a prank on her. About half an hour later the phone rang again. She picked it up and the deep voice bellowed: "I am the vindow viper and I''m coming down your road." Again, the woman put the phone down, thinking that the boys were very determined. Around a minute later, the phone rang again. She sighed and picked up the phone. Again, the deeep voice boomed: "I am the vindow viper and I''m just outside your door!" She put the phone down and the doorbell rang. She opened the door and there was an old man standing there. She said: "Who are you?" He said: "I am the vindow viper and I''ve come to vipe your vindows!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so dumb, she tells you Yo Momma jokes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what would be odd? Some one with a deep, dark voice calls you and says, "I know what your phone number is...heh heh..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Virgin Mobile wanted to sponsor the national team. SAFA (South African Footballing Association) refused to let it happen. They said, "How will it look if the team has Virgin written on their shirts when they get f****d up every other weekend?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A sandwich walked into a bar and asked for a pint. The bartender said, "Sorry, we don''t serve food."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first u dont suceed Fuck the world and smoke some weed', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today I was thinking to myself, how would my life be different if I was born one day earlier. I said nothing would change except I would have asked myself that yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black man dies on Halloween; he is sent to purgatory for a year. On the next Halloween, the man sees angels and God. He asked God if he is going to get wings and become an angel. God says, "No nigga, you are going to be a bat."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('cluckedy fuck, place your order Comment from the Editor: This is an extremely stupid joke and I would advise everyone to give it 0 smileys so that we can rid this world of stoners writing jokes!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beans, beans, good for the heart. The more you eat, the more you fart. The more you fart, the better you feel. So eat some beans with every meal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so ugly, the neighborhood kids dressed up as her for Halloween.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old lady was going up and down the halls in a nursing home wearing only a flimsy negligee. As she walked, she would flip up her nightgown at people and say, "Supersex!!" She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping her gown at him, she said, "Supersex." He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, "I''ll take the soup."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to school and learns stuff.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde and her brunette friend were listening to music together. The brunette had a few songs the blonde loved and so the brunette offered to burn a CD for her friend. "No, no," the blonde said, "I can burn my own CD" so the brunette lent the blonde the CD and they both went home. The next day the brunette went over to the blonde''s house and saw lots of fire engines and smoke and a smoldering lump where the blonde''s house had been. The blonde was off to the side looking angry. When she saw the brunette she stomped over and asked, "how exactly do you burn your CDs, because I tried using matches and it so did not work!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Throwing acid is wrong - in some people''s eyes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I know that most jokes about women involve the fact that they are not as "smart" as men and they cannot do two things at once. Nothing could be further from the truth. I have never met a woman, no matter what age, who cannot multi-task, all women can multi-task. They talk and piss you off at the same time!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was once a very very stupid farmer in Texas. The farmer decided he wanted to raise chickens, so he bought a standard gross of chicks. He planted the chicks in the field, watered them regularly, but nothing happened. He was a persistent type, though, so he bought another gross of chicks and planted them and cared for them - still nothing. Finally he decided he needed professional help, so he wrote a letter to the Texas A & M extension service, explaining exactly what he''d done in detail and asking for their advice. About two weeks later he received a letter from A & M, and read it: "Mr. X, we are unable to diagnose your problem without further information. Please send a soil sample."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a specimen? An Italian astronaut!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a bigamist? A heavy fog in Naples!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s bigotry? What you find in an Italian forest!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To find the inverse of a function, you reverse the process. To find the inverse of putting on your socks and shoes, how do you start? Socks first!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was taking a shower when the doorbell rang, so she put on a towel and answered it. It''s her neighbor Bob. Now, Bob has this huge crush on her, but she''s already married. Bob says to her, "If you drop your towel, I will give you $5,000." She is thinking that she could use the money, so she says yes, drops the towel, gets her money, and pulls her towel back up. Her husband comes along and asks, "Who was that?" She replied that it was Bob. The man saw the money in her hand and said, "Finally, Bob repaid us that $5,000 he owed us!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, she walks out to work in heels and comes back in pumps.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a little girl came running into her house yelling, "Mommy, I got five dollars!" The mother was curious, so she asked her child where she got the five dollars from. The little girl replied, "Tommy down the street gave me five dollars for doing cartwheels while he sat in the tree." The mother told her daughter, "Don''t you know that Tommy is just trying to see your undies?" "Ohhhh" said the little girl. The next day the little girl came running into the house yelling, "Mommy, I got ten dollars." The mother asked, "Where did you get the ten dollars from?" The little girl replied, "Tommy down the street gave me ten dollars for doing a cartwheel while he sat up in the tree and laughed." The mother replied, "Didn''t I tell you that he is..." Before the mother could finish, the little girl said, "Wait Mommy; I tricked him, I didn''t wear any undies today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Newfie goes to Toronto to seek his fortune, and after a couple of years is doing very well for himself. His brother calls from Newfoundland to tell him their father is very ill and probably won''t survive. "Well, if he dies I''ll pay for the funeral; the best of everything, spare no expense, just send me the bill," says the Toronto Newfie. Two weeks later he gets a bill in the mail for $7500.00 He sends the cheque off to his brother. The following week he gets a bill for $75.00 He sends the cheque off to his brother. The following week he gets another bill for $75.00 He sends the cheque off to his brother. The following week he gets yet another bill for $75.00 He sends the cheque off to his brother. The following week he gets a bill for $75.00 He calls his brother and says, "What the hell is going on; why do keep get a bill for $75.00 every week?" His brother tells him, "Well, you said spare no expense, so we rented Dad a tux."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Late one night at the insane asylum one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!" Another one said, "How do you know?" The first inmate said, "God told me!" Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did NOT!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Julie lose the race? Because Jodie won!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alabama: It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle. California: Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water. Nebraska: A parent can be arrested if his child cannot hold back a burp during a church service. New Mexico: Females are strictly forbidden to appear unshaven in public. Pennsylvania: A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling. No man may purchase alcohol without written consent from his wife. Tennessee: It is illegal to lasso a catfish in Tennessee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Washington: All lollipops are banned. A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town. In King County, in Seattle Washington, it is illegal to sit on a man''s lap on a metro bus, unless you are married. New York: A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and "looking at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll. Iowa: Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes. Kentucky: By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground." It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Florida: Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner. If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle. Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown. SARASOTA - It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit. Louisiana: It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol. Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault." North Dakota: Beer & pretzels can''t be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant. Ohio: Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Vermont: Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each week - on Saturday night. Indiana: Bathing is prohibited during the winter. Citizens are not allowed to attend a movie house or theater nor ride in a public streetcar within at least four hours after eating garlic. Massachusetts: Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches. Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked. An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public. Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts. Kentucky: By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground." It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Connecticut: You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour. You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands. Illinois: It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animal kept as pets. Iowa: Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes. West Virginia: No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions." Oklahoma: Violators can be fined, arrested or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog. Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state. Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property. Vancouver, WA has a city law that requires all motor vehicles to carry anchors... as an emergency brake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband walks into his house with a chicken under his arm and says "Honey I want you to meet the pig I''ve been fucking." Wife looks at him and says "dear, that''s a chicken not a pig!" Husband says "Shut up bitch I wasn''t talking to you!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a large seashell collection which I keep scattered all over the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I failed my driver''s test. The guy asked me "What do you do at a red light?" I said, "I don''t know... look around, listen to the radio...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if you''re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As I was coming back from Canada, I stopped at the border and the guy asked, "Do you have any firearms with you?" I answered, "What do you need?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is illegal to have over 16 women live in a house together because that constitutes a brothel. However up to 120 men can live together, without breaking the law. * You may not sing in the bathtub. * Fireworks stores may not sell fireworks to Pennsylvania residents. * Ministers are forbidden from performing marriages when either the bride or groom is drunk. * Motorized vehicles are not to be sold on Sundays. * You may not catch a fish with your hands. * You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth. * Dynamite is not to be used to catch fish. * Though you do not need a fishing license to fish on your own land, but a hunting license is required to hunt on your own land. * All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires. * No one is allowed to sleep on a refrigerator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man runs to the doctor and says, "Doctor, you''ve got to help me. My wife thinks she''s a chicken!" The doctor asks, "How long has she had this condition?" "Two years," says the man. "Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?" asked the shrink. The man shrugs his shoulders and replies, "We needed the eggs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive blonde woman from Kentucky arrived and bet twenty-thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope y''all don''t mind, but I feel much luckier when I''m completely nude." With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!" As the dice came to a stop she jumped up and down and squealed... "YES! YES! I WON, I WON!" She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departed. The dealers stared at each other dumfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I don''t know - I thought you were watching." Moral - Not all Kentuckians are stupid and not all blondes are dumb, but all men are men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so fat, when she put on a pair of Nike''s, it spelled out Nickelodeon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things You Don''t Want to Hear When Regaining Consciousness "Let me ask your opinion, nurse..." "Has anyone ever seen one of THESE?" "What do you mean, "It''s upside down"?" "This is what happens when cousins marry." "You think we can sew it back on?" "Is that SUPPOSED to be yellow?" "What does the AMA know; I still think I can do it." "Wow. Maybe I shouldn''t have gotten so drunk last night." "Does Tab A go into Slot C or Slot F?" "They never let us practice on REAL people in Med school." "Don''t worry, he''ll never know; he''s out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things You Don''t Want to Hear When Regaining Consciousness. "OK, make a wish and pull." "Back in a minute. Gotta put money in the meter." "What he doesn''t know, won''t hurt us." "Tilt that TV a bit. I can''t see the game." "That PROVES aliens have taken over our bodies." "Someone call the janitor - we''re going to need a mop." "I wish I hadn''t forgotten my glasses." "Oh no! I just lost my Rolex." "I learned that when I studied to be a vet." "Poor guy... Maybe we should give him a sex change." "He looks like my ex-wife''s attorney... The one who got her the house, the car, the money... he even got her!..." "C L E A R!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Australian truck driver is looking for a long distance driving job in Adelaide. He gets offered a job driving a load of bowling balls to Darwin. He''s not too keen on this, but he needs the money and so takes off. A while along the highway he sees two Aborigines with a bike, in the middle of nowhere, so he stops and asks if they would like a lift. They say OK. The truck driver says, "All right, hop in, but you''ll have to ride in the back." A 100 km down the road he stops at a truck stop, which amongst other things, involves a load inspection by the local cops. He is asked where he is off to and he says, "Darwin". The cops go round the back, open the doors, slam them shut quickly and rush round desperately to the driver, saying, "For Chrissake get going to Darwin straight away, and don''t stop - two of your eggs have already hatched, and one of them has stolen a bike!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re probably a redneck if.................... During your wedding, when you kissed the bride, your John Deere hat fell off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do if you discover an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Several years ago, Baltimore Zoo decided to encamp colonies of tiny Green Monkeys and large Drill Baboons together on an island, the theory being that the primates would stay put because neither could swim. But the morning after the exhibit opened, zoo officials found little Green Monkeys off the island and wandering around the zoo. The next two mornings, it was the same thing. Finally a vigilant keeper discovered the problem stemmed less from cage design than monkey manners. The baboons, unwilling to share food, were grabbing the Green Monkeys by their tails and hurling them like Olympic hammer throwers off the island during suppertime. The monkeys were no worse for their daily shuttle, but the colonies were separated anyway. The island is now a penguin reserve. Swing, swing, swing, *toss* Wheeeeeee! :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A jogger running down a country road is startled as a horse yells at him, "Hey - come over here, buddy." The jogger is stunned but runs over to the fence where the horse is standing and asks, "Were you talking to me?" The horse replies, "Sure was, man. I''ve got a problem. I won the Kentucky Derby a few years ago and this farmer bought me and now all I do is pull a plow and I''m sick of it. Why don''t you run up to the house and offer him $5,000 to buy me. I''ll make you some money cause I can still run." The jogger thought to himself, "Boy, a talking horse." Dollar signs started appearing in his head. So he runs to the house and the old farmer is sitting on the porch. The jogger tells the farmer, "Hey, man, I''ll give you $5,000 for that old broken down nag you''ve got in the field." The farmer replies, "Son, you can''t believe anything that horse says - he''s never even been to Kentucky."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('David Posman, 33, was arrested recently in Providence, Rhode Island, after allegedly knocking out an armored car driver and stealing the closest four bags of money. It turned out they contained $800 in PENNIES, weighed 30 pounds each, and slowed him to a stagger during his getaway so that police officers easily jumped him from behind. 45 year-old Amy Brasher was arrested in San Antonio, Texas, after a mechanic reported to police that 18 packages of marijuana were packed in the engine compartment of the car which she had brought to the mechanic for an oil change. According to police, Brasher later said that she didn''t realize that the mechanic would have to raise the hood to change the oil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Why are you knocking? I''ve got a doorbell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Arkansas, it is illegal to say the word Arkansas incorrectly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is some random advice to make you smile... MEN have 2 heads and WOMEN have 4 lips. The American Dental Association says semen cuts plaque and tartar by 77%. Suck a dick and save a smile... If you have sex 365 times a year, and if you melted down all of the condoms to make a tire, what would you call it? A fuckin Goodyear! Sex is like playing spades. If you don''t have a good partner, you''d better have a good hand. Big Bad Wolf told Little Red Riding Hood to lift her top so he could suck her tits. "No," she said while lifting her skirt, "Eat me like the fuckin book says!" A rooster and a cat were playing by the pool. The cat fell in and the rooster laughed. The rooster exclaimed, "A wet pussy always makes a cock happy!" Girls have unique magic tricks, they get wet without water, bleed without injury, and make boneless things hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harassment: The teacher asked Paco to use "harassment" in a sentence. Paco smiles and says......... "Orale vato (homeboy)...Mi ruca (my girl) caught me in bed with my sancha (lover), pero ( but) that''s okay porque (because) I told her that... HAR ASS MENT nothing to me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a teacher had a taste test with her students. She picked a little boy to do the first test. She blindfolded him, put a Hershey kiss in his mouth and asked, "Do you know what it is?" "No, I don''t," said the little boy. "OK, I''ll give you a clue. It''s the thing your daddy wants from your Mom before he goes to work." Suddenly, a little girl at the back of the room yelled, "Spit it out! It''s a piece of ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Matt''s dad picked him up from school one afternoon. Knowing the parts for the school play were supposed to be posted today, he asked his son if he got a part. Matt enthusiastically announced that he''d gotten a part. "I play a man who''s been married for twenty years." "That''s great, son. Keep up the good work and before you know it they''ll be giving you a speaking part."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rosy, posing thoughtfully in the mirror, says to Nina, "I think I''m going to see a dietitian." Nina asks, "Why?" Rosy answers, "''Cause I need to know once and for all how many calories there are in semen." Nina replies, "I really have no clue, but if you''re swallowing that much of it, no guy is going to care if you''re a little chunky."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Schizophrenia - Do You Hear What I Hear? Multiple Personality Disorder - We Three Kings Disoriented Are. Dementia - I Think I''ll Be Home For Christmas. Narcissistic - Hark The Herald Angels Sing About Me. Manic - Deck The Halls and Walls and Houses and Lawns and Streets and Stores and Offices and Towns and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and... Paranoid - Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me. Borderline Personality - Thoughts Of Roasting On An Open Fire. Personality Disorder - You Better Watch Out, I''m Gonna Cry, I''m Gonna Pout, Maybe I''ll Tell You Why. Obsessive Compulsive - Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle, Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells ..........', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newlywed sailor is informed by the navy that he''s going to be stationed a long way from home on a remote island in the South Pacific for 2 years. A few weeks after he gets there he really starts to miss his new wife, so he writes her a letter. "My darling," he writes, "it looks like we''re going to be apart for a very long time. Already I''m starting to miss you and we''re constantly surrounded by young, attractive native girls. The temptation''s terrible. I need some kind of hobby to keep my mind off them." His wife sends him back a harmonica with a note reading, "Why don''t you learn to play this?" Eventually his tour of duty comes to an end and he rushes back to his wife. "Darling" he says, "I can''t wait to get you into bed so that we can make passionate love!" But she stops him with a wave of her hand. "First, let''s see how well you play that harmonica."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe and Bill are out fishing and sipping beer while discussing football and NASCAR. All of a sudden Joe says, "I think I''m gonna divorce my wife. She hasn''t spoken to me in over 6 months." Bill sips his beer and says, "You better think it over, women like that are hard to find."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if all of your good clothes have come from cases of beer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if at your wedding your tux has a sign on the back that says "sponsored by Bubba''s Chicken and Waffles!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple was arranging for their wedding, and asked the bakery to inscribe the wedding cake with "1 John 4:18" which reads, "There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear." The bakery evidently lost, smudged or otherwise misread the noted reference, and beautifully inscribed on the cake, "John 4:18" "For you have had five husbands, and the man you have now is not your husband."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the river runs red Take the dirt road instead!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man, your mom''s like the UCLA; every year she gets beaten up by a lot of Trojans!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You mom''s soooo stupid, she thought fruit punch was a gay boxer!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Walking past a veterinary clinic, a woman noticed a small boy and his dog waiting outside. "Are you here to see Dr. Meyer?" she asked. "Yes," the boy said. "I''m having my dog put in neutral."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We invite grandparents to a special day at our school, culminating in a photo op with grandparent and grandchild posing in front of a colorful display from a history class. Only after the last shot was snapped did we notice what appeared above each grandparent''s head: a banner screaming, "Discover the Ancient World."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Men Are Like Dogs * Both take up too much space on the bed * Both have irrational fears about vacuuming * Neither tells you what''s bothering him * Neither of them notices when you get your hair cut * Neither understands what you see in cats', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On a trip to see Santa, little Johnny climbed into St. Nick''s lap and shared his wish list. Later that day, in another store, there was Santa again! "And what would you like for Christmas?" he asked little Johnny. Shaking his head, Johnny sighed, "You really need to write these things down."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the little pointy-eared boy down in the dumps? He had low elf-esteem. Why does Santa Claus come down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soots him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many elves does it take to change a light bulb? Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to give him a boost.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people divorce for good reasons, some for bad. Then there are people who divorce for these reasons: A man from Conneticut filed for divorce because his wife left him a note on the refrigerator that read "I won''t be home when you return from work. Have gone to the bridge club. There''ll be a recipe for your dinner at seven o''clock on Channel 2." A housewife filed for divorce on the grounds that her husband was having an affair. The woman became suspicious when every time the phone rang, her myna bird spouted things like "Divorce," "I love you" and "Be patient."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the first day of her vacation, a woman fell and broke her leg. As the doctor examined her, she moaned, "Why couldn''t this have happened on my last day of skiing?" He looked up. "This IS your last day of skiing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bicyclist came whizzing down a steep hill and smashed into a car as I stood there watching in horror. I ran over to see if I could help and discovered the wild rider was a friend of mine, an attorney. I knew he was going to be just fine when the first words out of his mouth were, "Did the driver admit he was at fault?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When she put on makeup it''s just like water, comes straight off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some members of a health club were having their first meeting. The director of the group said, "Now, I''d like each of you to give the facts of your daily routine." Several people spoke, admitting their excesses, and then one obviously overweight member said, "I eat moderately, I drink moderately, and I exercise frequently." "Hmm?" said the manager. "And are you sure there is nothing you over-indulge in?" "Well," said the man, "I lie extensively."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('HOW DO PEOPLE IN LOVE TYPICALLY BEHAVE? "When a person gets kissed for the first time, they fall down and they don''t get up for at least an hour." Wendy, age 8. "Mooshy...like puppy dogs...except puppy dogs don''t wag their tails nearly as much." Arnold, age 10. "All of a sudden, the people get movies fever so they can sit together in the dark." Shem, age 8. CONCERNING WHY LOVE HAPPENS BETWEEN TWO PARTICULAR PEOPLE "One of the people has freckles and so he finds somebody else who has freckles too." Andrew, age 6. ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE "Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life." John, age 9. REFLECTIONS ON THE NATURE OF LOVE "Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too." Greg, age 8. CONCERNING WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS "They are just practicing for when they might have to walk down the aisle some day and do the holy matchimony thing." John, age 9.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Signs of Aging Everything hurts and what doesn''t hurt, doesn''t work. You feel like the morning after, and you haven''t been anywhere. Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D. You get winded playing chess. You''re still chasing women but can''t remember why. You look forward to a dull evening. Your favorite part of the newspaper is "25 Years Ago Today..." You turn out the light for economic reasons rather than romantic ones. You sit in a rocking chair and can''t get it going. Your knees buckle, but your belt won''t. You regret all those mistakes resisting temptation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Signs of Aging You just can''t stand people who are intolerant. The best part of your day is over when your alarm clock goes off. You burn the midnight oil until 9 pm. Your pacemaker makes the garage door go up when you watch a pretty girl go by. The little grey haired lady you help across the street is your wife. You have too much room in the house and not enough room in the medicine cabinet. The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals. Your children begin to look middle-aged. You''ve finally reached the top of the ladder only to find it''s leaning against the wrong wall. Your mind makes contracts your body can''t keep. You''re 17 around the neck, 42 around the waist, and 96 around the golf course.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE "I''m in favor of love as long as it doesn''t happen when ''Dinosaurs'' is on television." Jill, age 6. "Love is foolish.....but I might try it sometime." Floyd, age 9. "Yesterday I kissed a girl in a private place...we were behind a tree." Carey, age 7. THE PERSONAL QUALITIES YOU NEED TO HAVE IN ORDER TO BE A GOOD LOVER "Sensitivity don''t hurt." Robbie, age 8. SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU "Shake your hips and hope for the best." Camille, age 9. "Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs...and don''t worry if their parents are right there." Manuel, age 8. HOW CAN YOU TELL IF ADULTS EATING DINNER IN A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE? "Romantic adults are usually all dressed up, so if they are just wearing jeans it might mean they used to go out or they just broke up." Sarah, age 9. "See if the man has lipstick on his face." Sandra, age 7.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I use to eat natural foods, but then I found out that 65% of all people die of natural causes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Harold was practicing the violin in the living room while his father was trying to read in the den. The family dog was lying in the den, and as the screeching sounds of little Harold''s violin reached his ears, he began to howl loudly. The father listened to the dog and the violin as long as he could. Then he jumped up, slammed his paper to the floor and yelled above the noise, "For pity''s sake, can''t you play something the dog doesn''t know?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sadly I will never be able to join a nudist colony..=[ My mother always told me not to point!! =]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story. Last year my teachers all believed in the, "There is no stupid question" thing, until we started talking about a three day trip our class was going to take. We had just finished talking about room arrangements. My teacher asked for any questions, stating his famous line, "There are no stupid questions." A girl raised her hand and asked, "Are guys allowed to bunk with us?" He now has a new fave line, "There are no stupid questions, just stupid people."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a court clerk, I am well-versed in the jury-selection process. First a computer randomly selects a few hundred citizens from the entire county to report for jury duty on a particular day. Then another computer assigns 40 of those present to a courtroom. Then the 40 names are placed in a drum, and a dozen names are pulled. During jury selection for one trial, the judge asked potential Juror No. 1 if there was any reason he could not be a fair and impartial juror. "There may be," he replied. "Juror No. 12 is my ex-wife, and if we were on the same jury, I guarantee we would not be able to agree on anything." Both were excused.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The musician Ted Nugent was being interviewed by a British radio show, and the liberal presenter was giving him a hard time about being a deer hunter. "What do you think is going through that deer''s head when you kill it?" she asks. "Don''t you think it is wondering what it ever did to harm you, and why you are being so cruel?" "No," replied Nugent, "I don''t think their thoughts are that complex. A deer only wonders when it will eat next, when it will have sex next, and if it is fast enough to run away from whoever would harm it. In that way, they really aren''t much different from the French."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe is sitting on a train across from a busty blonde wearing a very tiny mini skirt. Despite his efforts he can''t stop looking at her thighs. To his delight he discovers that she is wearing no underwear. The blonde suddenly notices that he is looking and asks, "Are you looking at my p*ssy?" "Yes, I am so sorry! I just couldn''t help myself. I will stop right away." After a while he starts to look again. "Are you looking again?" the blonde asks. "I am so sorry, I just can''t stop!" he says. "Oh, it''s okay. It''s quite talented, watch!" the blonde says. As the man is watching it blows a kiss at him! "What else can it do?" he asks. "It can also wink at you," she says. The man stares in disbelief as it winks at him. "Come and sit next to me." As the man sits down she asks him if he would like to stick two fingers in it? Then the man says, "Why, can it whistle too?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if a family tree is a redneck''s? The family tree goes straight down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so old, she doesn''t need a history book.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the last thing NASA heard before apollo 13 crashed? Let her drive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Policeman: "Lady, I''m arresting you for prostitution." Woman: "I''m not selling sex, I''m selling condoms with a free demonstration."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are a big animal that is big.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. how long does it take for a man to change a lightbulb? A. 5 mins. 20 secs. 1 min to get a lightbulb 1 min to try and change it 1 min to swear because he can''t do it 1 min to find a woman 20 secs. for her to change it 1 min for him to cry and gripe about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy had told all of his friends about the great steak he''d eaten downtown the day before. A group of them decided to head down and see if it was really as large and delicious as he was making it out to be. The group was seated in the back of the restaurant. After looking over the menu, they ordered and waited, hungrily, for their large, delicious, gigantic steaks. To their collective disappointment, the waiter brought out some of the smallest steaks they''d ever seen. "Now see here," the very embarrassed guy said to the waiter. "Yesterday, when I came down here you served me a big, juicy steak. Today, though, when I have my friends with me, you serve tiny steaks! What is the meaning of this?" "Yes, sir," replied the waiter, "yesterday you were sitting by the window."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear God, If we come back as something, please don''t let me be Jennifer Horton because I hate her. Denise Dear God, You don''t have to worry about me. I always look both ways. Dean Dear God, I think about You sometimes even when I''m not praying. Elliot Dear God, Of all the people who work for You, I like Noah and David the best. Rob Dear God, My brother told me about being born but it doesn''t sound right. They''re just kidding, aren''t they? Marsha', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear God, The bad people laughed at Noah - "You made an ark on dry land, you fool". But he was smart, he stuck with You. That''s what I would do. Eddie Dear God, I do not think anybody could be a better God. Well, I just want You to know but I am not just saying that because You are God already. Charles Dear God, I didn''t think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset You made on Tuesday. That was cool! Eugene Dear God, In Sunday School they told us what You do. Who does it when You are on vacation? Jane Dear God, I read the Bible. What does begat mean? Nobody will tell me. Love, Allison Dear God, Are you really invisible or is that a trick? Lucy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than 10 babies in one dumpster? 1 baby in 10 dumpsters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a Michigan State Player out of your yard? Set up a goal post.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('byuuyntfifgjrfnbrft9tn ...told you so.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse an Irishman? Line 4 shovels up against a wall and tell him to take his pick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Irish people jump on the bartender? He said, "The drinks are on me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? A policeman. What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill? Jailbreak. There is a Mexican, a French, a Italian, and an American. Their boat was getting too heavy so they decided to throw off some cargo. The Frenchmen tossed off a bottle of wine. All the others yelled, "What are you doing?" He replied, "We have too many of these in our country." Next, the Italian threw off a pizza. All the others yelled, "What are you doing?" He replied, "We got too many of these in our country." After that the Mexican threw off a bunch of tacos. All the others yelled, "What are you doing?" He replied, "We have too many of these in our country." Finally, the American had a turn to throw of some cargo. He threw off the Mexican. All the others yelled, "What are you doing?" He replied, "We have too many of those in our country."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl went into the barber shop to get a haircut. When the barber was cutting her hair he realized she was eating a little debbie snack. He said, "Sweetie, you''re going to get hair on your twinkie." The little girl answered, "I know, and I''m going to get boobs, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A pregnant woman was taking a shower and her three year old daughter said,"Mommy, you''re getting fat!"And the mother replied,"That because a baby is growing in my tummy."To which the daughter said,"Yeah,but what''s growing in you butt?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men were engineers checking a bridge when out of nowhere this masked man pointed a gun at them and said ,"If you want to live,you''ll jump off the bridge and you''ll survive."Well,the gunman turned around to take his mask off and when he turned around the engineers saw it was a construction worker."April Fools!"he yelled out as water shot out from the"gun".The first engineer looked at him and said,"Tell that to the man who jumped when you had turned around."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Do you have any corn?" and the bartender says, "No, we only sell beer." The next day the man walks into the bar again and asks for corn but this time the bartender says, "Hey, you are the guy that asked for corn yesterday? If you ask for corn one more time i will nail you to the wall!" The next day the man goes into the bar again and asks, "Do you have any nails?" and the bartender says, "No," so the man says, "Do you have any corn?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there were 3 children that were sent to the head of the school''s office. Their names were Fly, Dick and Piss. When they got there, no one was there so Fly hid on the desk, Dick hid under the desk and Piss started to jump around. When the head of the school got there he said "Fly down, Dick up and Piss on the floor!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('FLATTERY - What your kid does when they want something. EAT VEGETABLES - What your kid does when they want dessert. Usually. BEG, CRY, or WHINE - What your kid does when they want something you don''t want to give them. CALL - What your kid does when they get a good grade. "FORGET" TO CALL - What your kid does when they do NOT get a good grade. BRUSH TEETH - What your kid promises to do so you will let them eat candy. And then they forget. DRINK MILK - What your kid does after they heat it up and add hot chocolate powder. SPILL WATER - What your kid does when they want to drink soda instead. DROP THEIR LUNCH - What your kid does when they don''t like what you made for them. PRETEND TO SLEEP - What your kid does when they don''t want to talk. READ - What your kid does when you buy them a new comic book. DO HOMEWORK - What your kid does only when you yell at them. USE THE COMPUTER - What your kid does, all the time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a fun way to irritate your friends and family on your answering machine! On your answering machine - "Hello?" pause, "What''s up?" pause again, "Oh, well you must feel pretty stupid right now because you''re talking to my answering machine! So leave a message!" Beep.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four-year-old Robert tells his kindergarten teacher that he has a new baby brother, called Spot. "Spot?" says the teacher. "Are you sure it''s not a puppy your Dad bought you?" Robert was adamant that his brother''s name was Spot - until next morning, when he issued a correction. "Actually, it''s Mark."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Speak your mind out when you''re angry. You''ll make the best speech you''ll ever live to regret.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock? Who''s there? Madame. Madame who? Madame foot is stuck in the door!! (My damn foot is stuck in the door.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Cows. Cows who? No, owls hoo, cows moo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly when i punch her she looks better than before.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that when I take a picture of her and hang it on the wall, it still falls down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did Margie say about her brain surgeon? "I really gave him a piece of my mind!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should you look out for a pig that knows karate? It might give you a pork chop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Movie stars are a reel treat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did Alfo make a quart of juice from 3 oranges? It was a tight squeeze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to them, and points at the guy in the middle, shouting, "Your mom''s the best lay in town." Everyone expects a fight, but the guy ignores him and the drunk wanders off and stands at the far end of the bar. Ten minutes later, the drunk comes back, points to the same guy, and says, "I just screwed your mom, and it was swe-e-et!" Again the guy refuses to take the bait, and the drunk wanders off. Ten minutes later he comes back and announces, "Your mom even let me..." Finally the guy interrupts: "Go home Dad, you''re drunk!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This old couple is ready to go to sleep so the old man lays on the bed but the old woman lays on the floor. The old man asks, "Why are you going to sleep on the floor?" The old woman says, "Because I want to feel something hard for a change."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s more fun to color outside the lines. If you''re gonna draw on the wall, do it behind the couch. Ask why until you understand. Even if you''ve been fishing for 3 hours and haven''t gotten anything except poison ivy and a sunburn, you''re still better off than the worm. Make up the rules as you go along. It doesn''t matter who started it. Ask for sprinkles. If the horse you''re drawing looks more like a dog, make it a dog. Save a place in line for your friends.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sometimes you have to take the test before you''ve finished studying. If you want a kitten, start out asking for a horse. Picking your nose when no one else is looking is still picking your nose. Just keep banging until someone opens the door. Making your bed is a waste of time. There is no good reason why clothes have to match. Even Popeye didn''t eat his spinach until he absolutely had to. You work so hard pedalling up the hill that you hate to brake on the way down. You can''t ask to start over just because you''re losing the game.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Clinton, Alabama, it is illegal to molest your automobile. Now how would you go about doing that? And how would your automobile testify against you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when the post office burns down? A case of black mail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) In Illinois, it is illegal to speak English. Well then, what do they speak? Gibberish? 2) In Crete, Illinois, it is considered an offense to attempt to have sex with someone else''s dog. First of all, why would anybody attempt to even have sex with a dog? Second of all, is it okay to attempt to have sex with your own dog? And finally, my favorite one of all. . . 3)In New York, the penalty for jumping off a building is death. Duh! No, we''re all going to magically survive a 50 story drop to the concrete below.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Gorillas Sleep on in fruit orchards? Apricots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does Tommy run around the school track 98 times every day? He has a run track mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a rodeo star get around? With a cattle-act.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happened when Ray Johnson fell off the Empire State Building? Now everyone calls him x-ray.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Quiz Show give away $10,000 plus one banana? They wanted the prize to have appeal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman''s guide to sex: Lay there and pretend to enjoy the experience and when it is done tell your partner it was the best you ever had. Man''s guide to sex" In, Out repeat if necessary!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple are getting married in a big fancy church with all of the relatives and friends in attendance. The priest is going through the nomal procedure and when he comes to the part "If anyone objects to the union of these two people in Holy Matrimony let them speak now or for ever hold their peace". A redneck in the back row jumps up and hollers "I object, I am in love with her and she''s carrying my baby!" As the gathering gasps in surprise the redneck runs up the aisle, shoves the groom aside and rips off the brides veil. After a moment of silence the redneck exclaims, "Hey you ain''t my sister!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? John: You told me to do it without using tables. __________________________________________ Teacher: Glen, why do you always get so dirty? Glen: Well, I''m a lot closer to the ground than you are. _______________________________________ Teacher: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? Simon: No sir, I don''t have to, my Mom is a good cook. ______________________________ Teacher: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother''s. Did you copy his? Clyde: No, teacher, it''s the same dog. ___________________________________ Teacher: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? Harold: A teacher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me I''m going in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two gay guys are having sex. The penis says to the asshole "you think you have it bad, I''m up to my nuts in shit over here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After everything I say I want you to say "I am a Man." You go to a bar. I am a man You see a girl and go meet her I am a man You take her home I am a man You get in bed with her I am a man She whispers in you ear I am a man (This is very funny when saying it out loud with a friend. Instruct them to say "I am a man." after each line you say.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the butcher introduce his wife Meat Patty', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday a pastor asked his congregation to consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns. After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed that someone had contributed a $1,000 bill. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation, and said he''d like to personally thank the person who had placed the money in the plate. A very quiet, elderly, saintly widow shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front. Slowly she made her way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much and asked her to pick out three hymns. Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the three handsomest men in the building and said, "I''ll take him and him and him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is like a TV; Even a 4 year old could turn her on.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so poor she found a ciagarette on the ground and said, "Honey, we got a fire tonight!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde and her boyfriend went to a car store. He asks her what car she wants but she says, "I dunno." So he takes her around to all the car shops and she says, "I want the BMW." He asks her why she wants a BMW and she says, "Because I dunno how to spell the other brands!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are not as stupid as you look. That would be impossible.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What shall we play today? Cori asked her best friend Judy. "Let''s play ''school''!" said Judy. "Okay," said Cori, "But I''m going to be absent."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and a brunette have been fighting for over an hour about the sun. The brunette yells,"THE SUN IS A STAR!!!" The blonde yells,"NO IT''S EVERYONE IN THE WORLD''S FARTS!" The brunette says to the blonde,"Girl, you couldn''t play any stupider!" Shocked, the blonde says in reply,"Who''s playing?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old, she was at the afterparty when Moses brought down the Ten Commandments.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid, when Moses brought down the Ten Commandments, she said, "Where''s the ketchup?" HINT:commandments condiments', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy comes walking out of a store carrying a big grandfather''s clock. A drunk man bumps into him and the guy drops the clock and smashes it all to hell. The guy says, "Why don''t you watch where you''re going?" and the drunk says, "Why don''t you carry a wrist watch like everybody else?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so ugly, she walks down the street and a little boy says,"look Mommy, there''s Shrek!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sixty is the worst age to be, said the 60 year-old man. "You always feel like you have to pee and most of the time you stand there and nothing happens." "Ah, that''s nothin," said the 70-year-old. "When you''re seventy, you don''t have a bowel movement any more. You take laxatives, eat bran, sit on the toilet all day and nothing happens." "Actually," said the 80-year-old, "Eighty is the worst age of all." "Do you have trouble peeing, too?" asked the 60-year old. "No, I pee every morning at 6:00. I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock; no problem at all." "So, do you have a problem with your bowel movement?" "No, I have one every morning at 6:30." Exasperated, the 60-year-old said, "You pee every morning at 6:00 and crap every morning at 6:30. So what''s so bad about being 80?" "I don''t wake up till 7:00."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked the Lord to tell me Why my house is such a mess. He asked if I''d been ''computering'', And I had to answer, "yes." He told me to get off my fanny And tidy up the house. And so I started cleaning up... The smudges off my mouse. I wiped and shone the topside. That really did the trick... I was just admiring my work... I didn''t mean to ''click.'' But click, I did, and oops I found A real absorbing site That I got SO way into... I was into it all night.<<Sigh>> Nothing''s changed except my mouse It''s very, very shiny. I guess my house will stay a mess... While I sit here on my hiney.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few decades from now, George Bush will die (everyone dies eventually). He goes up to Heaven where he sees a bunch of clocks, and he asks God what the clocks do. "These clocks go forward one minute each time the person tells a lie." Bush looks for his clock. "Where''s mine?" "Oh, that one? I use that as a ceiling fan." "WHAT?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy in a restaurant says to the waitress, "I want a cup of coffee without cream." The waitress comes back a few minutes later and says, "I''m sorry, but we''re all out of cream. Would you mind taking your coffee without milk?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An eight year old girl tried checking a book out of the library, entitled ''Advice for Young Mothers''. The librarian, being a typically nosey and puritanical librarian, asked, "Why do you want to check out this particular book, dear?" The little girl replied, "Because I collect moths."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, 3 men were walking around in the desert. One was poor, but had lots to drink and was smart; one was rich and very thirsty but was smart, and the last was poor, thirsty and stupid. Suddenly a genie popped up and said, "Each of you can have one wish, but it is a different sort of wish to the usual. Each of you can go down this magic slide," and a slide appeared from nowhere, "and whatever you say in the slide you will land in a large pile of whatever you said." The first man went down and said, "GOLD," and he landed in gold; the second man said, "COCA-COLA," and he landed in coca-cola; the last man said, "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" and he landed in wee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes to Italy to attend a two week, company training session. Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her a good trip. The wife answers, "Thank you hon, what would like me to bring for you?" The husband laughs and says, "An Italian girl." The woman kept quiet and left. Two weeks later he picks her up at the airport and asks, "So, hon, how was the trip?" "Very good, thank you." "And what happened to my present?" "What present?" she asked "The one I asked for - an Italian girl!" "Oh, that," she said. "Well, I did what I could, now we''ll have to wait for nine months to see if it''s a girl!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beaverton, OR- You must buy a $10 permit to be allowed to install a burglar alarm. Portland, OR- People may not whistle underwater.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fool and his money are soon partying.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When does running mean walking? When you''re running out of gas!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call Asians swimming in a pool? A. Cornflakes', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Time may fly, but does it have wings?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Russian leaders does it take to change a lightbulb? We don''t know. Russian leaders don''t last as long as lightbulbs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so ugly, that when she was born the doctor smacked her butt and his hand melted!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Conserve water. Shower with a friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('y''know, they made a movie about me once. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. "Oops." "Is that thing called a lung?" "And my mom wanted me to help people." "Shoot! That''s the third pair of tongs this week!" "I can''t pull it out!" "This belongs on MTV." "No one asked for your opinion." "It''s a boy!" "Hey! I can see the operating table!" "Brilliant. Now what?" "I need a lawyer." "What have you been eating?!" "This is all a dream...this is all a dream..." "Mommy!" "Fire in the hole!" "I knew I should''ve stopped drinking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a little teapot, short and stout. "I have whooping cough!" "Where did my bandage go?" "I think I''m going to puke." "I can compare myself to Rachel Ray! NOT!" "If I mess up one more time, I''m turning this blade on you." "I summon up my Eighth Amendment Right!" "I wanted to be an executioner!" "Burp!" "I just live here." "What color the meat is, I don''t care! I''m not even wearing any underwear!" "Man, this place just stunk up bad." "You want fries with that?" "Johnny, my meat is on fire!" "Surreal."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two farmers were boasting about the strongest wind they''d ever experienced. "Out here in California," said one, "I''ve seen the fiercest wind in my life. You know those giant redwoods trees? Well the wind got so strong it bent them right over." "That''s nothing," said the farmer from Iowa. "Back on my farm we had a wind one day that blew a hundred miles per hour. It was so bad that one of my hens had her back turned to the wind and laid the same egg six times!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she sank Atlantis!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes over to her married son''s house and walks in to find her daughter-in-law sitting in a chair, entirely nude. The mother-in-law says, "What the hell are you doing?" "I''m wearing my love dress," responds the daughter-in-law, "We haven''t made love in a long time." So the mother-in-law says, "Hm, maybe I should try that." She goes home to find her husband is not in, so she gets undressed. Two hours go by and finally she hears her husband''s car. He walks in the front door and says, "What the hell are you doing?" "I''m wearing my love dress," says the wife. "Well," responds the husband, "it needs to be ironed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Im not on my period... I just dont like you :P', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What if there were no hypothetical situations?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can pick your friends, You can pick your nose; But you cant pick your friends nose.... What true words....!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During class, the chemistry professor was demonstrating the properties of various acids. "Now I''m dropping this silver coin into this glass of acid. Will it dissolve?" "No, sir," a student called out. "No?" queried the professor. "Perhaps you can explain why the silver coin won''t dissolve." "Because if it would, you wouldn''t have dropped it in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparatus is a fancy word for thingy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Cleveland, Ohio, it''s illegal to catch mice without a hunting license. Dr. Seuss coined the word "nerd" in his 1950 book "If I Ran the Zoo." It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather for a year''s supply of footballs. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married. There are an average of 178 sesame seeds on a McDonald''s Big Mac bun. The world''s termites outweigh the world''s humans 10 to 1. Pound for pound, hamburgers cost more than new cars.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Heinz ketchup leaves the bottle, it travels at a rate of 25 miles per year. The Bible has been translated into Klingon. Ten percent of the Russian government''s income comes from the sale of vodka. On average, 100 people choke to death on ballpoint pens every year. In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world''s nuclear weapons combined. Reno, Nevada is west of Los Angeles, California. Average lifespan of a major league baseball: 5 pitches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Elephants can''t jump. Every other mammal can. Internationally, Baywatch is the most popular TV show in history. Five Jell-O flavors that flopped: celery, coffee, cola, apple, and chocolate. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match. Humans are the only primates that don''t have pigment in the palms of their hands. The 3 most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca-Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Age 6 - I''ve learned that if you spread the peas out on your plate, it looks like you ate more. Age 8 - I''ve learned that if you laugh and drink soda pop at the same time, it will come out your nose. Age 10 - I''ve learned that you should never jump out of a second story window using a sheet for a parachute. Age 11 - I''ve learned that if you want to get even with someone at camp, you rub their underwear in poison ivy. Age 13 - I''ve learned that just when I get my room the way I like it, Mom makes me clean it up. Age 16 - I''ve learned that when my parents are in a bad mood, it''s best to agree to everything they say or things get nasty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Age 27 - I''ve learned that I should never praise my mother''s cooking when I''m eating something fixed by my wife. Age 30 - I''ve learned that motel mattresses are better on the side away from the phone. Age 31 - I''ve learned that nothing really bad happens when you tear those little "do not remove" tags from pillows. Age 42 - I''ve learned that marrying for money is the hardest way of getting it. Age 52 - I''ve learned that if you like garlic salt and Tabasco sauce you can make almost anything taste good. Age 53 - I''ve learned that after age 50 you get the furniture disease. That''s when your chest falls into your drawers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day the same old thing Essays, reading, handwriting I do it all while sitting here With a very tempting computer near. I try to ignore the silent plea "Please, surf the net on me" I, for a while I ignore the call By writing a paper on the Taj Mahal. But inevitably It gets to me I shove my work out of the way (Don''t worry I''ll do it another day). The screen savers gone when I click on the mouse A happy blue glow fills up the house I open the Internet, "Whoopitydee" I yell (there are 5 new emails for me). When I''ve replied I surf the net Is there anything exciting? You bet! I''ll do this while the sun fades away Marking the end of another long day But I will not notice, oh no not me I''ll be too wrapped up in my computer you see.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas and a hurricane in Florida have in common? Somebody''s fixin'' to lose them a house trailer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second. A dime has 118 ridges around the edge. A cat has 32 muscles in each ear. A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours. A goldfish has a memory span of 3 seconds.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A shark is the only animal that can blink both eyes. A snail can sleep for three years. A crocodile cannot move its tongue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Babies are born without kneecaps. They don''t appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years old. Butterflies taste with there feet. Cats have over 100 vocal cords. Dogs have about 10. February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon. In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the population of China walked past you, in a single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction. If you are an average American, in your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at a red light. Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our eyes are always the same from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite. Rubber Bands last longer when refrigerated. "Lollipop" is the longest word typed with only the right hand. The average person''s left hand does 56% of the typing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Bible does not say there were three wise men; it only says there were three gifts. The cruise liner, QE2, moves only 6 in. for each gallon of diesel that if burns. The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter in the alphabet. The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid. The words ''racecar'' ''kayak'' ''level'' and ''radar'' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left. (palindromes)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar. There are more chickens than people in the world. There''s no Betty Rubble in the Flintstones Chewable Vitamins.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women blink nearly twice as much as men. Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest its self. The largest fish is the whale shark-it can be over 50 feet long and weigh 2 tons. The only continent without native reptiles or snakes is Antarctica.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mosquitoes have 47 teeth. An ant can lift 50 times its own weight. Holland is the only country with a national dog. The first penny had the motto "mind your own business. Before mercury, brandy was used to fill thermometers. Chinese is the most commonly spoken language in the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In 1634, tulip bulbs were a form of currency in Holland. A male kangaroo is called a boomer. Penguins have an organ above their eyes that converts sea water to fresh water. Bamboo makes up 99% of a panda''s diet. The first human-made object to break the sound barrier was a whip. Beavers were once the size of bears. The first ballpoint pens were sold in 1945 for $12.00 each.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Antarctica is the driest, coldest, windiest and highest continent on earth. Panama is the only place in the world that you can see the sun rise on the Pacific and set on the Atlantic. The only lighthouse to use electricity was the Statue of Liberty. A honey bee can fly up to 15 m.p.h.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hawaii is the only U.S. state not to report a temperature of 0f* or below. Kangaroos can jump 30 ft. The first bike was called a hobbyhorse. A hummingbird weighs less than a penny. The smallest county in America is New York County, better known as Manhattan.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A single coffee tree produces only about a pound of coffee beans a year. The only bird that can swim but not fly is the penguin. The tallest man was 8''11" The first vacuum was so large; it was brought to a house by horse. A female kangaroo is called a flyer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The average human produces about 10,000 gallons of saliva in a lifetime. Until the nineteenth century, solid blocks of tea were used as money in Siberia. Americans spend more than $630 million a year on golf balls. You must play ping-pong for 12 hours to lose a pound. The life span of a taste bud is ten days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2,500 left handers die each year using products designed for right handers. Most people hear better with their right ear. Animals that lay eggs don''t have belly buttons. Honey bees are the only insects that create a form of food for humans.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first TV remote control, introduced in 1950, was called Lazy Bones. Lemon sharks can give birth to about 36 babies at one time. The top of the Empire State Building was originally built as a place to anchor blimps. The area code in Cape Canaveral, Fl, is 321.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baboons were once trained by Egyptians to wait on tables. A queen bee can lay 800-1500 eggs per day. The Popsicle was invented in 1905 by an 11-year-old boy. "Disco" means "I learn" in Latin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first TV network kids show in the U.S. was "Captain Kangaroo." Before 1687 clocks were made with only an hour hand. There are towns named Sandwich in Illinois and Massachusetts. Caterpillars have over 2,000 muscles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The first typewriter was called the "literary piano." Frogs can''t swallow with their eyes open. A duck''s quack doesn''t echo. August has the highest percentage of births.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you Drive on the Parkway but Park on the Driveway?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bear was bought from a Russian circus by a tourist agent after he was asked to provide an American visitor with a "wild bear hunt". The tourist was taken to the Perdelkino Forest near Moscow and when all was ready, the bear was released. As the hunter closed in on his prey, a postman passed by on his bike, saw the bear, and tumbled off in surprise. Recalling his Big Top training, the bear grabbed the bike and pedalled off, leaving the American to sue for fraud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In February 1993 a train knocked down and injured an elephant calf in the Sylhet region of Bangladesh. When the next train came along an hour later the calf''s mother blocked the track, then banged her forehead against the engine for 15 minutes, until it could no longer run. Then she walked off into the jungle again, leaving about 200 passengers stranded for over five hours. A man driving to work through the southern desert of Saudi Arabia ran over one of a troupe of monkeys. When he made the return trip later that day, the remaining monkeys were waiting for him. They spotted his car, jumped on it, and smashed the windows with their fists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign in a realtor''s office: "Lots for little." Sign at entrance of the IRS: "Watch your step." Sign in a bookstore: "We treat you write." Sign on a front door: "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog." Sign on a parking space at a garden nursery: "Reserved for plant manager." Sign on a door to a psychiatric ward: "Please do not disturb further." Sign for a litter of dachshund pups: "Get a long little doggie!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign on the inside of a bathroom stall: "Beware of limbo dancers." A hardware store in Oregon has a sign that reads: "Today''s special." Below, it says: "So''s tomorrow." Sign in school: "In case of atomic attack, the federal ruling concerning prayer in this building will be temporarily suspended." Sign seen on an electricity pylon: "DANGER! To touch these wires will result in instant death. Anyone found doing so will be severely prosecuted." Sign at a garage in Hertfordshire: "Please do not smoke near the pumps. If your life isn''t worth anything, gas is!" Sign seen in the vicinity of Victoria Station: "Closed for official opening."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims! What are the feathers on a turkey''s wings called? Turkey feathers. Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building? Yes - a building can''t jump at all. Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had the drumsticks. Where did the first corn come from? The stalk brought it. When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat, that when she went to the doctor, he did an ultrasound test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a six year old blonde came up to her mother and said: "When I grow up, I want to be a Hillary Duff, she''s amazing!" lol, only a blonde would say that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Mr. Dorren''s first grade class was learning the alphabet. One of his students came up to Mr. Dorren and asked to go to the bathroom. Mr. Dorren said, "First, recite the alphabet." The student started, "A, B... ... L, M, N, O, Q..." When he finished, Mr. Dorren asked, "Where''s the ''P''?" "Running down my legs." replied the student.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and sees a blond cowboy coming down the walk with nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun and his boots So the sheriff arrests him for indecent exposure. As he is locking him up he asks, "Why in the world are you dressed like this?" Cowboy: "Well, it''s like this, Sheriff. I was in the bar down the road and this pretty little redhead asks me to go out to her motor home with her, and I did. We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to pull off my shirt, so I did. Then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off my pants, so I did. Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off my shorts, so I did. Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of funny and says, "Now go to town cowboy...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do men and sperm have in common? They both have a one in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the other side! Why did the Mexican Chicken cross the Border? To get to the U.S.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy walked into a petshop and went up to a clerk. The boy asked if she had dachshunds in the store. The clerk said yes, and she went and got the dog out of the cage and handed it to him. He got all excited when he held it and immediately went to the checkout and gave the clerk a check for $100, that he said was his birthday money. He was so excited and anxious that the clerk asked why he wanted that dog so much, and not a big dog like most boys got when they came in. He replied, "I''ve always wanted to be a cowboy and now I can, because the song says ''Get along little dogie!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a atheist and his son dicussing religion. The young man later brought up the discussion with his friends, who explained to him the concept on the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. That day the man went home and told his father that there were three gods and explained to him what his friends had said. The father stared at his son and said, "No, son, there is only one god, and we don''t believe in him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An angel appears at a faculty meeting and tells the history teacher that in return for his unselfish and exemplary behavior, the Lord will reward him with his choice of infinite wealth, wisdom, or beauty. Without hesitating, the history teacher selects infinite wisdom. "Done!" says the angel, and disappears in a cloud of smoke and a bolt of lightning. Now, all heads turn toward the history teacher, who sits surrounded by a faint halo of light. One of his colleagues whispers, "Say something." The history teacher sighs and says, "I should have taken the money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The old pastor made it to a practice to visit the parish school one day a week. He walked into the 4th grade class, where the children were studying the states, and asked them how many states they could name. They came up with about 40 names. He jokingly told them that in his day students knew the names of all the states. One lad raised his hand and said, "Yes, but in those days there were only 13."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A class professor was giving a lecture on company slogans and was asking his students if they were familiar with them. "Justin," he asked, "which company has the slogan, ''come fly the friendly skies''?" Justin answered the correct airline. "Sandra, can you tell me which company has the slogan, "Don''t leave home without it?" Sandra answered the correct credit card company with no difficulty. "Now Allison, Tell me which company bears the slogan, ''Just do it''?" And Allison answered, "Mom..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A medieval astrologer prophesied to a king that his favorite mistress would soon die. Sure enough, the woman died a short time later. The king was outraged at the astrologer, certain that his prophecy had brought about the woman''s death. He summoned the astrologer and commanded him, "Tell me when you will die!" The astrologer realized that the king was planning to kill him immediately, no matter what answer he gave. "I do not know when I will die," he answered finally. "I only know that when I die, you will die two days later."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Little Johnny and his family went for a walk they saw two dogs having sex, girl on top of boy. Johnny didn''t know much about sex, so his parents didn''t say anything. Later that night, Johnny''s parents were having sex and Johnny walked in on them. Before his parent''s could say anything, Johnny yelled out, "Mom get on top of dad. Hurry, because I want a puppy!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Steve, Bob, and Jeff were working on a very high scaffolding. Suddenly, Steve falls 50 feet to the ground below and he is killed instantly. After the coroner leaves with Steve''s body, Bob volunteers to inform Steve''s wife of the terrible news. Some two hours later, Bob returns to the work site with a six-pack of beer under his arms. "Say, Bob, where did you get the six-pack?" "Steve''s wife gave it to me!" "What! You just told her that Steve died and she gave you a six-pack?" "Well, before I broke the news to her, I asked her if she was Steve''s widow. She said she wasn''t, so I said I''d bet her a six-pack she was!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a Mexican with a vasectomy? A dry Martinez.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If there is H2O on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside? K9P.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What goes oh oh oh? Santa walking backwards', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you make the number 1 disappear? Add a "g" to it and it''s "gone"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does the barber cut the moon''s hair? E-clipse it', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blond cross the road? I don''t know. Neither did he.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde who went shopping for lip-gloss just so she could pass the make-up exam?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady named Annala had 4 children. They didn''t spent a lot of time together. One day Annala''s husband said,"How about having a picture contest, so we can have a great time! We can invite the whole family; Grandma, Grandpa, and the rest of the gang!" The mother accepted the challenge. The day of the picture contest everyone was there. So far everyone had very lovely pictures. A picture of a flower, a picture of a cat, a picture of a dog, and a picture of a duck. The youngest child was the last. Everyone was cheering while he was presenting. He proudly announced, "This great picture I made is of my mommy and daddy wrestling on the bed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at home one day when my son walked in on me and my husband.He said "Momma i found this moving around on the floor".(holding up my vibrator)I said "huh?"he asked if he could play with it...I said sure not knowing what it was at the time....I come out of my room go in his and its in his ass. Needless to say,he has watched me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the blonde''s left leg say to her right leg? Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is revenge sweet, but payback is a b*tch?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Age 1: You don''t piddle in your pants Age 4: You can walk without help Age 21: You can drive Age 60: You can drive Age 70: You can walk without help Age 80: You don''t piddle in your pants', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('90 percent of people in Idaho say, "Oh shit!" when in a car wreck, The other ten percent say, "Hold my beer and watch this shit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day I was watching the news and there was the strangest story. You see a man went to Huck''s gas station and was filling up his red gas holder for emergencies during the winter, and when he put the cap on some sloshed out onto his arm. He didn''t think anything of it and went on ahead and got in his car and drove off. Two miles down the road he lit up a cigarette and caught his arms on hands on fire! He pulled off to the side and a cop driving by pulled over by him. And you know what he gave the man a ticket... for illegal use of fire-arms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In WW2 Captain Saunders was wounded in battle and captured by the Germans. He was sent to a German military hospital. On his first day in the hospital a doctor came, bearing bad news, "we have to amputate your legs." The Captain was very sad, however he asked the doctor if his legs could be dropped in his commanders next bombing mission over Britain. The doctor asked his commander, and he said yes. And sure enough it was dropped. On the second day the doctor came bearing more bad news, "we have to amputate your left arm." The Captain was sadder than before, but he asked if this could also be dropped, in the commander''s next mission. The answer was yes and it was dropped. On the third day, the doctor came bearing even more bad news, "we have to amputate your right arm." The Captain was also sad, and he asked the arm could be dropped in the next bombing mission. The doctor replied, "NO, my commander thinks you are trying to escape"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men are traveling in the Amazon, a German, an American, and a Mexican, and they get captured by some Amazons. The head of the tribe says to the German, "What do you want on your back for your Amazonian whipping?" The German responds, "I will take oil!" So they put oil on his back, and a large Amazon whips him ten times. When he is finished the German has these huge welts on his back, and he can hardly move. The Amazons haul the German away, and say to the Mexican, "What do you want on your back?" "I will take nothing!" says the Mexican, and he stands there straight and takes his ten lashings without a single flinch. "What will you take on your back?" the Amazons ask the American. He responds, "I''ll take the Mexican."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was sitting in chat room, Feeling mildly amused, When I saw something strange, That left me all confused. Someone typed a word, (As far as I could tell) But I had never seen it. What is an LOL? Then the plot got thicker, More words I didn''t know, A person started typing, The word LMAO. I sat there in amazement, I felt like a dumb toad. Could it be, these people, Were speaking in a code? That''s when I looked closer. And found the subtle clue. I figured out this code And I''ll share it now, with you. LOL is three little words, That seem, to me, quite shady. Why would someone ever write The words, "Lean Over Lady"? LMAO, was more obscure, It made me sweat my socks! LMAO is a command, Meaning, "Leave Me Alone, Ox!" ROFL was harder still, I found it rather sickening. It''s a discreet way to say, "Ready Only For Licking!" I can''t believe that AOL, Would let this code exist! To them I say, YOMSL Meaning, "You''re On My Shit List!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many will recall that on July 8, 1947, witnesses claimed that an Unidentified object with five aliens aboard crashed onto a sheep and cattle ranch just outside Roswell, New Mexico. This is a well-known incident that many say has long been covered up by the US Air Force and the federal government. However, you may NOT know that in the month of March 1948, exactly nine months after that historic day, Albert Arnold Gore, Jr., Hillary Rodham, John F Kerry, William Jefferson Clinton, Howard Dean, Nancy Pelosi, Dianne Feinstein, Charles E Schumer, and Barbara Boxer were born. See what happens when aliens breed with sheep? This piece of information may clear up a lot of things.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Santa:Oye, you know once, when I was very young, I jumped from the 20th floor of a building. Banta: Then what happened? Did you survived or die? Santa replied: "Oye, I forgot, that was years ago".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q1: What is red and goes tring tring tring? A1: tomato and the tring tring tring was to confuse you anyways. Here''s one more. Q2: What is red and goes tring tring tring? A2: The door bell and the red was to confuse you anyways. Here''s one more. Q3: What is red and goes tring tring tring? A3: A cake and both were to confuse you anyways. Here''s one more. Q4: What''s red and goes tring tring tring? A4: Fire brigade, OBVIOUSLY! You thought I was trying to confuse you again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Tom throw butter outside the window? Because he wanted to see the butter-fly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, when she get in the elevator, u know, its Goin Down! (does motorcyle dance)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Musharraf went to the US & had a meeting with President Bush. Bush said, "I want to show you the advancement in technology in USA. Come with me." Bush takes him in a deep forest and says, "Dig the ground." Musharraf digs. Bush says, "More, more, more..." Musharraf has now reached 100 feet. Bush says, "So now, did you find anything?" Musharraf, "I got a wire!" Bush says, "You see, it shows that even 200 years ago we used to have telephones!" Musharraf was very frustrated and he invited Bush to Pakistan. In Pakistan Musharraf says, "Now I want to show you the advancement in Pakistan!" He takes Bush to a forest and asks him to dig. After some time Musharraf says, "More. ... More... more!" Bush has now reached almost 400 feet. Musharraf says, "Find anything?" Bush tries but finds nothing, "Nothing here!" Musharraf says, "You see! 400 years ago we had WIRELESS telephones!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple visit a sex therapist, who asked the wife, "What''s your main complaint about your sex life? She replied, "My husband suffers from premature ejaculation." The therapist asked the husband, "Is this true?" He replied, "Well, not exactly, I don''t suffer. She does."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man received a notice from the IRS that he was being audited. He asked his accountant for advice on what to wear to the meeting with the IRS agent. The accountant said, "Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let them think you''re poor." The man asked his lawyer the same question. The lawyer advised, "Show them you''re a professional. Wear your best suit and tie." Confused, the man went to his rabbi and asked his advice. "Let me tell you a story," the rabbi said. "A woman was getting married. She asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. Her mom said, `Wear a long flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck,'' but her best friend said, `Wear a sexy negligee.''" The man asked. "What does this have to do with my problem with the IRS?" The rabbi replied, "The lesson is that no matter what you wear, you''re going to get screwed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Something to text to your friendz The police found a body with no brain, fucked up teeth, a small dick, and a swollen asshole Just called to make sure you are okay I was worried', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when a lion roars? Tom n Jerry starts!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A noted biologist, who had been studying little green frogs in a swamp, was stumped. The frog population, despite efforts at predator control, was declining at an alarming rate. A chemist at a nearby college came up with a solution: The frogs, due to a chemical change in the swamp water, simply couldn''t stay coupled long enough to reproduce successfully. The chemist then brewed up a new adhesive to assist the frogs'' togetherness, which included one part sodium. It seems the little green frogs needed some "monosodium glue to mate".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to her six- year-old son, Johnny, and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn''t know what to say," Little Johnny replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say," the mother said. Little Johnny bowed his head and said, "Dear Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Little Johnny''s teacher asked the class "Children, who can answer this question, please raise your hand!" "Mention things you can suck!" "Ice cream, mam!" Little Jane answered. "Good, Jane." the teacher said, "Anyone else?" "It''s a lollipop!" said Little Steven. "Very good, now it''s your turn Johnny!" the teacher said. Little Johnny, sitting at back then answered, "I think it''s lamp!" The teacher and all of the students wondered about Little Johnny''s answer. The teacher asked him, "Johnny, how do you think we can suck lamp?" "Well, last night when I passed my parents'' bedroom", Little Johnny said, "I heard my mom said, please turn off the lamp, honey, and let me suck it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alligator One day, Grandma sent her grandson Johnny down to the water hole to get some water for cooking dinner. As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and hightailed it for Grandma''s kitchen. "Well now, where''s my bucket and where''s my water?" Grandma asked him. "I can''t get any water from that water hole, Grandma" exclaimed Johnny. "There''s a BIG ol'' alligator down there!" "Now don''t you mind that ol'' alligator, Johnny. He''s been there for a few years now, and he''s never hurt no one. Why, he''s probably as scared of you as you are of him!" "Well, Grandma," replied Johnny, "if he''s as scared of me as I am of him, then that water ain''t fit to drink!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baby Brother Little Johnny''s new baby brother was screaming up a storm. He asked his mom, "Where''d we get him?" His mother says, "Heaven, Johnny." Johnny says, "Geez, I can see why they threw him out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Baked Beans One of the matrons of the church was cooking a pot of her famous beans for the church potluck, and her son, Little Johnny, came running through the house, BB gun in one hand, and a handful of BBs in the other. He tripped and the BBs, naturally, went right into the pot of beans. Thinking it over, Little Johnny could think of no reason why he should risk punishment, so he said nothing. The dinner went well, and, as usual, the beans were one of the favorite dishes. The next day, the church secretary, Mary, called Little Johnny''s mother and said, "Jane, your beans were delicious as usual, but what did you put in them this time?" Jane replied, "Nothing new, why do you ask?" "Well," said Mary, "this morning I bent over to feed the cat and shot the canary."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blood Circulation A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said, "Now, boys, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I should turn red in the face." "Yes, sir," the boys said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn''t run into my feet?" Little Johnny shouted, "''Cause yer feet ain''t empty."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven''t got the guts to bite people themselves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harry, Bill and Steve are sitting at the corner bar enjoying themselves, when Ted walks in looking distressed. "Ted, you look awful. What''s wrong?" Harry asks. Ted says, "Last night I got really drunk, and then somewhere between here and my house, I was abducted by an alien?" Everyone is shocked. "I heard about this kind of thing happening!" Bill says. "What did the alien do to you?" "I don''t remember all the details," Ted says. "All I remember is being anally probed by the alien." Everyone is horrified. "I heard that they''ll do that!" Steve says. "What did the alien look like?" Ted responds, "Bill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the most dangerous insect? The hepatitis bee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The little church in the suburbs suddenly stopped buying from its regular office supply dealer, so the dealer telephoned Deacon Brown to ask why. "I''ll tell you why," shouted Deacon Brown. "Our church ordered some pencils from you to be used in the pews for visitors to register." "Well," interrupted the dealer, "didn''t you receive them?" "Oh, we received them all right," replied Deacon Brown. "However, you sent us golf pencils; each stamped with the words, `Play Golf Next Sunday.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('a = b, b = c, a = c. Math Teacher: If a = b and b = c then a = c. Now give me the practical example of this principle from real life. Student: I love you, sir, and you love your daughter, which means I love your daughter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ahmed was in the hospital, near death, so the family sent for his friend Tauseef Khan. As Tauseef stood beside the bed, Ahmed''s frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Tauseef lovingly handed him a pen and piece of paper, and Ahmed used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note, then died. Tauseef thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped it into his jacket pocket. Several days later, at the funeral, Tauseef was visting Ahmed''s family. He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he''d worn the day Ahmed died. "You know," he said, "Ahmed handed me a note just before he died. I haven''t read it, but knowing him, I''m sure there''s a word of inspiration there for us all." He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You''re - standing - on - my - oxygen - tube!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How to identify a dumb guy. You should be sure the person is a dum guy when he: Puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to make up his mind. Gets stabbed in a shoot-out. Sends a fax with a postage stamp on it. Tries to drown a fish in water. Thinks socialism means partying. Trips over a cordless phone. Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept. At the bottom of the application where it says "Sign Here" he puts "Sagittarius." Studies for a blood test and fails. Sells the car for gas money. Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead. Drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, "Airport left", he turns around and goes home. Gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Then there was the dyslexic robber who held up the bank with a gnu.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you confuse a frog? Put it in a round bowl and tell it to take a nap in the corner. How does a frog confuse you? When he comes out and says he needed that nap and feels much better!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this really annoying elephant named Izzy who loved to brag. One day she went up to a camel, Mell, and said, "I am the most beautiful animal you''ll ever see!!" Mell looked at her like she was crazy and said no you''re not! Izzy said, "Well, I look better than you because I don''t have two boobs on my back!" Mell replied, "True, very true. But at least I don''t have a dick on my face."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between you and a ho? The ho is smarter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following are actual questions written to pastors from children across the world. Dear Pastor, Please say a prayer for our Little League team. We need God''s help or a new pitcher. Thank you. Alexander. Age 10, Raleigh Dear Pastor, My father says I should learn the Ten Commandments, but I don''t think I want to because we have enough rules already in my house. Joshua. Age 10, South Pasadena Dear Pastor, Who does God pray to? Is there a God for God? Sincerely, Christopher. Age 9, Titusville Dear Pastor, Are there any devils on earth? I think there may be one in my class. Carla. Age 10, Salina Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon on Sunday. Especially when it was finished. Ralph, Age 11, Akron Dear Pastor, How does God know the good people from the bad people? Do you tell Him or does He read about it in the newspapers? Sincerely, Marie. Age 9, Lewiston', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Pastor, I would like to go to heaven some day because I know my brother won''t be there. Stephen. Age 8, Chicago Dear Pastor, I think a lot more people would come to your church if you moved it to Disneyland. Loreen. Age 9. Tacoma Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon where you said that good health is more important than money but I still want a raise in my allowance. Sincerely, Eleanor. Age 12, Sarasota Dear Pastor, Please pray for all the airline pilots. I am flying to California tomorrow. Laurie. Age 10, New York City Dear Pastor, I hope to go to heaven some day but later than sooner. Love, Ellen, age 9. Athens', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear Pastor, I know God loves everybody but He never met my sister. Yours sincerely, Arnold. Age 8, Nashville. Dear Pastor, Please say in your sermon that Peter Peterson has been a good boy all week. I am Peter Peterson. Sincerely, Pete. Age 9, Phoenix Dear Pastor, My father should be a minister. Every day he gives us a sermon about something. Robert Anderson, age 11 Dear Pastor, I''m sorry I can''t leave more money in the plate, but my father didn''t give me a raise in my allowance. Could you have a sermo', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who was the greatest financier in the Bible? Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible? Pharaoh''s daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible? Samson. He brought the house down. Where is the first baseball game in the Bible? In the big inning, Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel, and the Prodigal Son came home. The Giants and the Angels were rained out. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible? David. He rocked Goliath to sleep. What is the best way to get to Paradise? Turn right and go straight. Where is the first tennis match mentioned in the Bible? When Joseph served in Pharaoh''s court.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re in incredible shape, the doctor said. "How old are you again?" "I am 78," said the man. "78!" remarked the doctor. "How do you stay so healthy? You look like a 60-year-old." "Well, my wife and I made a pact when we got married that whenever she got mad she would go into the kitchen and cool off and I would go outside for a walk to settle down," the man explained. "What does that have to do with it?" asked the doctor. "I''ve pretty much lived an outdoor life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat when she got into the UPS truck they had to change the name to DOWNS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A drunk lay slumped outside a bar, in serious need of a drink. A passing priest and bishop started to lecture him on the evils of alcohol. "You should be more like God, like me," said one. The other argued, "No, my son, more like me. I am more like God." The two holy men then argued over which was more like God. Finally, the drunk interrupted. "I''m more like God than either of you arguing hypocrites, and if you give me ten bucks, I''ll prove it!" They accepted his challenge and each handed him five dollars. As the drunk stood, he said, "You two go sit in the bar and when I enter you''ll have your proof." The bishop entered first and the barkeep said, "Good afternoon, Bishop, what''ll you have?" Then the priest entered and the barkeep said, "Good afternoon, Father, what''ll you have?" Finally, the drunk came in waving his ten dollars. The bartender shrugged, "Oh, God, not you again!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What breaks up a redneck orgy? When mom and dad/uncle arrive home too soon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Year 1981 1. Prince Charles got married 2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe 3. Australia lost the Ashes 4. Pope Died In Year 2005 1. Prince Charles got married (again) 2. Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe(again) 3. Australia lost the Ashes (again) 4. Pope Died (again) Moral of the story - In future, if Prince Charles decides to re-marry.... Please warn the Pope', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('James Bond: "My name is Bond" Continuing in his inimitable style, "......James Bond." Then Bond asks: "And you?" Telugu Guy: "My name is Rao... Siva Rao... Samba Siva Rao... Venkata Samba Siva Rao... Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao... Rajasekhara Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao... Sitaramanjaneyula Rajasekhara Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao... Vijayawada Sitaramanjaneyula Rajasekhara Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao..." Since then when anyone asks Bond his name he simply says "James Bond"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly." On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?" "Yes," the boy''s mother answered. "And how is your son now?" the psychiatrist asked. "Who cares?" the mother replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('THIS WAS REAL! My brother and his friend went out to eat at a restaurant. The restaurant was packed so they had to wait. The waitress then asked them for a name so she could call them when their table was ready. My brother''s friend decided to give her a fake name. So then my brother and his friend were waiting. When it they were finally called, this is what could be heard throughout the whole entire restaurant, "Balz, party of two!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you carry more than two extra tires in the back of your truck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you were married in a laundromat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you eat cotton candy more than three times a week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if the only thing you inherited from your father was alcoholism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if both you and your wife wore ponytails on your wedding day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if there is a four-wheeler parked in your bedroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you think that "home security" means taking the front steps to your trailer with you when you leave the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your bar tab has page numbers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if you constantly call the feed and seed store to see if the cat has had her kittens yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if your father-in-law said that you had no class, so you spit at him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('230 The number of keys in an ordinary piano is eighty eight 231 ''Man is a Tool Making Animal'' was said by Benjamin Franklin 232 The term ''anesthesia'' was coined by Oliver Wendell Holmes 233 The first man to reach Antartica was Fabian Gottlieb 234 The Kilimanjaro volcano is situated in Tanzania 235 The invention that is considered to have built America is dynamite', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of ''COINCIDENCE?''" STUDENT: "Sir, my mother and my father got married on the same day, same time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots ! Student: Yes it''s really strange. I''ve got another pair just like that at home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Game Set Match = Tennis Set Match Run = Arson', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a captain of a ship, and every day at a certain time he would lock himself up in his cabin and look inside a mysterious black box. He did this every day, but he told nobody what was inside the box. Then one day he died, and in his testament he gave the crew permission to open the box. So they opened the black box, and what they found was a piece of paper: "Starboard is right, port is left."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that when someone asked her for her weight, he replied with, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''re being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They''re trained for that.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('rats have more bones than men parrot can see backwards without turning its head HUMMING BIRD - (RUBY-THROATED) -------------------------------- MASS: About 3-4g (a nickel weighs about 5g). LENGTH: About 8.5cm (3.5") from tip of bill to tip of tail WING BEATS: About 60-80 times per second in normal flight, up to 200 times per second in courtship dives SPEED: Normal flight about 25mph; up to 65kph (40mph) in a courtship dive HEARTBEATS: About 250 times per minute while at rest, about 1,220 per minute while flying BREATHING: About 250 breaths per minute while at rest BODY TEMPERATURE: 40.5 degrees C (105-108 degrees F) FEATHERS: A typical Hum-bird has 940 feathers. FEED RATE: Eats about its weight in nectar or sugar water each day. AVERAGE AGE: Most hummingbirds die within their first year; those that don''t probably live an average of 3 years or so', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The smartest dogs are the Jack Russell Terrier and Scottish Border collie. Dumbest: Afgan hound. A rat can go without water longer than a camel can. The fat molecules in goat''s milk are 5 times smaller than those found in cow''s milk. It takes 20 minutes for the stomach to break down as opposed to the hour that it takes to break down cow''s milk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('IN 24 HOURS AVERAGE HUMAN 1) HEART beats 103,689 times. 2) LUNGS respire 23,045 times. 3) BLOOD flows 1,680,000 miles. 4) NAILS grow 0.00007 inches. 5) HAIR grows 0.01715 inches. 6) Take 2.9 pounds WATER (including all liquids.) 7) Take of 3.25 pounds FOOD. 8) Breathes 438 cubic feet AIR. 9) Lose 85.60 BODY TEMPERATURE. 10) Produce 1.43 pints of SWEAT. 11) Speak 4,800 WORDS. 12) During SLEEP move 25.4 times.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How you get rid of grey hairs: 1. Dye all your hair the color grey. 2. Shave your head. 3. Now you have no grey hairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy and his two friends are talking at a bar. His first friend says: "I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician. The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren''t mine." His second friend says: "I think my wife is having an affair with the plumber. The other day I found a wrench under the bed and it wasn''t mine." Paddy says: "I think my wife is having an affair with a horse." Both his friends look at him with utter disbelief. "No, I''m serious. The other day I came home and found a jockey under our bed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so stupid, that I told her to do the robot, and damn! Now R2-D2 got AIDS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Help.... The Titanic is going to sink. Everybody on the ship is shouting, crying, running or praying to God... Just then an Italian asks a nearby blond on the ship, Italian: "How far is land from here?" Blond: "Two miles." Italian: "Only two miles? Then why are these fools making so much noise? I can swim even further." The Italian jumps off the ship into the sea and comes up to the surface to ask something again. Italian: "Just tell me which side is the land two miles from here?" Blond: "Downwards......"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which dog doesn''t have a tail? Hot dogs, of course.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... A: Does that mean that one enjoys it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did You Know .... Did you know that in the human body there is a nerve that connects the eyeball to the anus? It is called the anal optic nerve. It is responsible for giving people a crappy outlook on life. If you don''t believe it, pull a hair from your ass, and see if it doesn''t bring a tear to your eye.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Penis breath, a lover''s dread. Is what you get when you give head. Unpleasant as it tends to be. Be grateful that he doesn''t pee. It''s times like this you wonder why. You bother reaching for his fly. But it''s too late, can''t be a tease. Accept the facts, get on your knees. You know you''ve got a job to do. So open up and shove it through. Lick the tip then take it all. Don''t drag your teeth or he might bawl. Slide up and down, use your tongue. And feel the precum start to run. So when the fuck''s he gonna cum. Just when you can''t take anymore. Your hear your lover''s mighty roar. And when he hit''s that real high note. You feel it oozing down your throat. Salty, fishy, sticky, nasty stuff. Okay already, that''s enough. Let''s switch you say, before you gag. And what''s your revenge, you''re on your rag.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A loaded mini van pulled in to the only remaining site at a campground. Four children leaped from the vehicle and began feverishly unloading gear and setting up the tent. The boys rushed to gather firewood, while the girls and their mother set up the camp stove and cooking utensils. Impressed, a nearby camper sauntered over and said to the youngsters'' father, "That, sir, is some display of teamwork." "I have a system," the father replied. "No one goes to the bathroom until the camp is set up."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple enjoyed getting away from their high-stress jobs by spending weekends in their motor home, but their peace and quiet was often disturbed by well-meaning, but unwelcome, visits from other campers. Finally, they found a way to assure themselves privacy. They painted a sign near their RV''s door: "Ask us about our Whole Life policies!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the other hand you have five fingers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some people have friends who are dwarfs, not me I have a friend who is a midget dwarf. He is the guy who poses for the sport trophys', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Women like silent men - they think they''re listening.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I''m Mr. Sugarbrown''s daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong; she must say, "I''m Jane Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said, "Aren''t you Mr. Sugarbrown''s daughter?" She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I''m not."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Twinkle, twinkle little star how I wonder what you are Shine upon a parking lot As I eat my girlfriends twat. Peter, Peter pumpkin eater Saw a chick but couldn''t meet her Saw her brother one fine day Sucked his cock and now he''s GAY. Jack Sprat could eat no fat His wife could eat no lean So he ignored her flabby tits An licked her asshole clean. Eenie Meanie Miney Mo Suck my dick and swallow slow. Mary Mary quite contrary Shave that pussy its so damn hairy. Hickory Dickory Dock Some chick was sucking my cock The clock struck two I blew my goo And dumped the bitch off at the next block. Hickory Dickory Dock Some chick was sucking my cock It was quite scary all wrinkled and hairy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And then there was the glass-blower who got hiccups and made 764 marbles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think your life is bad, how would you like to be an egg? You get laid once in life, you only get eatten once in life, It takes 4 min to get hard, but only 2 min. to get soft, you share your box with 11 other guys, but worst of all the only chick who ever sat on your face was your mother. Pass this to someone who needs a good lay, sorry I mean day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what to say when someone is trying to roast you? "Sorry, but my brain doesn''t interpret stupid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a woman taking a shower when she heard a knock on door. A voice called, "It''s me, the fireman." So the woman wrapped a towel around herself and went to the door. The fireman said, "Congratulate me, I just put out a fire!" So the woman congratulated him and went back to her shower. Then she heard another knock on her door and a voice called, "It''s me, the policeman". So the woman wrapped a towel around herself and went to the door. The policeman said, "Congratulate me, I just caught a robber". So the woman congratulated him and went back to her shower. But before long she heard another knock on her door and a voice called, "It''s me, the blind man," so she didn''t bother putting a towel around herself and answered the door where the blind man said, "Congratulate me, I just got my eyesight back!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: "How come you do not comb your hair?" Billy: "No comb, Sir." Teacher: "Use your dad''s then." Billy: "No hair, Sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s so old, she babysat Yoda!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Tommy was telling his friend Billy all about his Christmas presents. "My daddy bought me a mouth organ. It''s the best present I''ve ever had." "Why?" "Because my mummy gives me extra money every week if I don''t play it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of young children was sitting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions. "Davy, what noise does a cow make?" "It goes moo." "Alice, what noise does a cat make?" "It goes meow." "Jamie, what sound does a lamb make?" "It goes baaa." "Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make?" "Errr..it goes.. click!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother was teaching her three-year-old daughter The Lord''s Prayer. For several evenings at bedtime, she repeated it after her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo. The mother listened with pride, as she carefully enunciated each word right up to the end. "And lead us not into temptation", she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grandpa and granddaughter were sitting talking when she asked, "Did God make you, Grandpa?" "Yes, God made me," the grandfather answered. A few minutes later, the little girl asked him, "Did God make me, too?" "Yes, He did," the older man answered. For a few minutes, the little girl seemed to be studying her grandpa, as well as her own reflection in the mirror, while her grandfather wondered what was running through her mind. At last she spoke up. "You know, Grandpa," she said, "God''s doing a lot better job lately."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a high school break-in in Plymouth, North Carolina, two burglars found a camera in one of the classrooms and amused themselves by taking pictures of each other committing the crime. When they couldn''t figure out how to get the film out of the camera, they concluded it wasn''t loaded and left it behind. The men apparently didn''t realize they''d been fooling around with a digital camera that stores pictures on a computer disk. Investigators downloaded the snapshots to a computer and got a complete photographic record of the break-in. The suspects were quickly arrested. A luckless thief pleaded guilty to the attempted robbery of a convenience store in Detroit Lakes, Minnesota. The thief told a passer-by he was going to rob the store, gave the man a dollar, and asked him to go inside and buy a scarf to hide his identity during the crime. The bystander took the dollar, went inside the store... and called the police.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Nevada fugitive wanted on fraud charges was arrested in Connecticut after he blew his cover by applying for a job... as a police officer. The Connecticut cops discovered the man''s fugitive status during a standard background check. He had passed both the written and agility tests before being found out. Police called the man in to headquarters under the guise of getting his fingerprints, and served him with an arrest warrant instead. A repeat offender got a life sentence for a small-time shoplifting caper in Jupiter, Florida. The man stole $49.73 worth of boxer shorts, panties, a sports bra and some cigarette lighters from a Wal-Mart store. His mistake was flashing a knife at a security guard - which turned his petty theft into a felony. Since the man had been released from prison less than three years before, Florida''s repeat offender law required the judge to send him away for life without the possibility of parole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man: Why do you have a steering wheel in your crotch? Other Man: My wife was driving me nuts', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I invented a cure for amnesia - but I''ve forgotten what it is!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was lost for hours when he suddenly came up to a house. The man knocked on the door and asks to enter. The woman who owns the house asked, "Who is it?" The man answered, "I and I King Silassi I Jah Rasta Fari." The lady replied, "Go away, there are too many of you for me to let you in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so fat that her roller blades went flat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sorry I''m late... I had to walk down stairs... since yo momma took up the entire elevator and it broke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man boarded an airplane in Sydney, Australia, with a box of crabs. A female crew member took it and promised to put it in the crew''s refrigerator, which she did. Shortly before landing, she couldn''t remember who gave her the package, so she announced to the entire cabin, "Would the gentleman who gave me the crabs in Sydney please raise your hand?" Not one hand went up, so she took them home and ate them herself!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bubba walked into a doctor''s office and the receptionist asked him what he had. Bubba said, "Shingles." So she wrote down his name, address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat. Fifteen minutes later a nurse''s aide came out and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, "Shingles." So she wrote down his height, weight, a complete medical history and told Bubba to wait in the examining room. A half hour later a nurse came in and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, "Shingles." So the nurse gave Bubba a blood test, a blood pressure test, an electrocardiogram, and told Bubba to take off all his clothes and wait for the doctor. An hour later the doctor came in and asked Bubba what he had. Bubba said, "Shingles." The doctor asked, "Where?" Bubba said, "Outside on the truck. Where do you want them?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is completely true! Okay, so it was after dinner and my sister, dad and I were at the table just kinda goofing off then my sister asked me this riddle: There is one man in a jungle, he reaches into his pocket and takes something out, it has a head and a tail but no body, yet he is not afraid. What was the thing he found in his pocket? I couldn''t figure it out so my dad gave me a hint: you can flip it. I still could not figure it out. What do you flip? asked my dad. Then I was all like: A coin. A COIN! A COIN! THAT''S IT, A COIN!!! What can I say? I''m a blonde, but it doesn''t count too much because I have dirty blonde hair and blonde and dirty blonde isn''t the same thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Chuck Norris beat the brick wall in tennis. 2. The boogy man does not wait for chuck norris, Chuck Norris waits for the boogy man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One employee asked another, "How long have you been working here?" The second said, "Ever since the boss threatened to fire me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is true! In a speech George W. Bush made in 2001 he concluded: But all in all, my wife and I have had a wonderful year! (2001 was the year that the Twin Towers were destroyed)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was recently riding with a friend of mine. We were coming to a red light, and he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why''d you do that?" He tells me this is how his brother drives. We come to another red light, and again, he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why''d you do that?" Again, he tells me this is how his brother drives. We come to a green light, and he SLAMS on the brakes. My heart nearly goes into my throat. I shouted at him, "Why do you do that?!" He replied, "You never know, my brother could be coming the other way."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell the difference between a blonde and a red head? Hair color.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get pikachu on a bus? You pokemon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lou sat at the bar furiously pounding down shots of whiskey. His best friend, Jim, spotted him and said, "Lou, what''s going on? Are you okay? I''ve known you for fifteen years and I''ve never seen you drink like this before." Staring at his next filled shot glass, Lou replied, "My wife just ran off with my best friend," and tossed that drink down, too. "But I thought that I was your best friend?" said Jim. Lou looked at Jim through bloodshot eyes and slurred, "Not any more!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Somali arrives in Minneapolis as a new immigrant to the United States. He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you Mr. American for letting me in this country, giving me housing, food stamps,free medical care, and free education!" The passerby says, "You are mistaken, I am Mexican." The man goes on and encounters another passerby."Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in America!" The person says, "I not American, I Vietnamese." The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand and says, "Thank you for the wonderful America!" That person puts up his hand and says, "I am from Middle East, I am not American!" He finally sees a nice lady and asks, "Are you an American?" She says, "No, I am from Africa!" Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the Americans?" The African lady checks her watch and says..."Probably at work."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke.The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup. The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil. At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results: The first worm in alcohol - Dead. The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead. Third worm in chocolate syrup - Dead . Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive. So the Minister asked the congregation,"What can you learn from this demonstration?" Maxine was sitting in the back, quickly raised her hand and said,"As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won''t have worms!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with a pig? Jurassic pork!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at my friends house and we were bragging about how little we can eat. My friend J.B sister said some times I don''t eat all day. I asked her, "oh you fast?" Then she says, "No, I''m actually pretty slow." Then her mom told her fasting is not eating for a long time. That is why breakfast is called breakfast, to break your fast and eat. Then his sister goes, "How do you know?" I busted a gut so bad. She should have been a blond.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman phones up her husband at work for a chat. HIM "I''m sorry dear but I''m up to my neck in work today." HER "But I''ve got some good news and some bad news for you dear." HIM "OK, darling, but as I''ve got no time now, just give me the good news." HER "Well, the air bag works."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One man solved his problem of too many visiting relatives by borrowing money from the rich ones and loaning it to the poor ones.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between the Library of Congress and the House of Representatives? In the Library of Congress you''re not allowed to lick the pages!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest was assigned a small church in the Alaskan backwoods. After a couple of years, the bishop stopped by to see how he was doing. "Ah, Bishop, it''s really lonely here. I couldn''t have made it without my Rosary and two martinis a day." The bishop replied, "You know, a martini would taste good right now." The priest agreed and yelled into the kitchen, "Hey, Rosary! Fix us a couple of martinis, will ya!?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A son asked his mother the following question: "Mum, why are wedding dresses white?" The mother replies, "Son, this shows your friends and relatives that your bride is pure." The son thanks his Mum and goes off to double-check this with his father. "Dad, why are wedding dresses white?" The father says, "Son, all household appliances come in white."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teenage boy with spiked hair, a nose ring, and baggy clothes was overheard telling a friend, "I don''t really like to dress like this, but it keeps my parents from dragging me everywhere with them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two fat men took part in a marathon. One ran in short bursts, and the other ran in burst shorts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fat woman and a slim woman were both smoking cigarettes; which one finished hers first? The fat woman - she takes bigger draws.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We all know that Hilary Duff dyed her hair blonde, but the turning point when she actually BECAME a blonde was in a song she wrote. It was the following: "When the light is off then it isn''t on." From the song "So Yesterday."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t think of yourself as a zero, think of yourself as the number below one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The policeman stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name. "I''m Mrs. Ladislav Abdulkhashim Zybkcicraznovskaya from the Republic of Uzbekistan visiting my daughter in Columbia," she said. The cop put away his summons book and pen, and said, "Well, OK... but don''t let me catch you speeding again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Idaho. Idaho who? I da hoe!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man hated the Trojans. He loved USC. Why? He hated using Trojan condoms. He wanted to have sex the o''natural way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did Richard Nixon become President? Everyone called him Dick! They judged him by his name!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know when you''ve had enough sex? When you die from AIDS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This storm is bad, Bob thundered.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A book never written: Becoming a Better Artist by N.O. Creativity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A book never written: L.O.L. (lots o'' logs) by P. Lumyum', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A book never written: Yellow Rivers by L. O. Tsoftea', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher is telling her class she has two words that will not be allowed to use. Teacher: There are two words which I will never let you use. One is gross and the other is cool. Student: So what are the words?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many football players does it take to change a lightbulb? The whole team - and they each get a semester scholarship for it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a book never written. Extinction is Distinction by Dinah Soar', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What bird can''t fly as high as you can jump? A bird in a cage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which candles burn longer, the candles on a girl''s cake or a boy''s cake? No candles burn longer. They all burn shorter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A doctor one day was accidentally cut rather badly on the leg. He went to an operating theatre and started to stitch his own leg up, using a local anaesthetic. While doing this, a colleague came into the room, and offered to help. The first doctor thanked him, but said he would carry on himself. The second doctor said, "Ok, suture self!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde goes into a newsagent''s office and asks for her usual paper. The newsagent says, "Did you know your paper is going to cost more from tomorrow?" "In that case, I''d better buy ten more of today''s!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, a man walked into a bar. He went up to the counter and ordered his drink. The guy next to him had a bowl of chili that he didnt seem to be eating. "Sir, could I bother you for some chili?" he asked very politely. "Go right ahead" he responded, passing the chili. About half way through, he saw there was a rat at the bottom of the chili. In repsonse to this he puked the chili back up. At this time the man next to him stared. "Funny thats farther than I got," he said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so dumb I told her to do an essay and she went and fucked a mexican...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many George Walter Bushes does it take to change a lightbulb? Luckily, only 2. The world can''t handle many more idiots.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Returning home from dinner out one night, I started to feel sick. Suspecting food poisoning, I called the restaurant''s manager. "I can''t believe that happened!", she said. She sounded truly shocked. "What did you order?" I told her I ordered the meat loaf. "That''s weird,"she observed."Usually it''s the stuffing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was playing in the playground when he looks over and sees two teenagers having sex. He runs over to his mum who tells him that they are making ''cupcakes''. He then goes on and continues playing. He then sees two 20 year olds getting naked in the sand box. He runs over to his mum and asks what they are doing. She again tells him that they are making ''cupcakes''. The next morning Little Johnny''s mum asked him if he had a good sleep. He replies no. He then goes on "You and daddy were making a lot of noise when you were making ''cupcakes'' last night". She Replies "And how do you know we were making "cupcakes?" He then says with a huge grin on his face. "I licked the icing off the couch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you tell when a lawyer is well-hung? When you can''t fit your fingers between the rope and his throat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Microsoft Employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they''ll just make darkness the new industry standard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does playing the bagpipes and throwing a javelin blind-folded have in common? You don''t have to be very good at either to get a lot of peoples'' attention.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does anyone know why I have nightmares? Because the last man that had a "dream" got shot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were 3 boys named trouble, jackass, and manners. They were playing a game of hide and seek. Trouble was counting, manners was hid up in a tree, and jackass was hiding behind the same tree. A police man walks over to jackass and says "I''ll give you a lollipop if you tell me your name". He then replies, "jackass." The police man says where are your manners, he then points up in the tree. The police man says, "are you looking for trouble". Trouble then says "no trouble is looking for me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Utah, the following laws are on the books: 1) Birds have the rightaway on all highways. 2)It''s legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list. 3) In Tremonton, it is illegal to have sex in a moving ambulance.If you are caught doing so the guy is let go and the woman is punished and her name appears in the newspaper. 4) In Trout Creek, pharmacists may not sell gunpowder to cure headaches.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) In Bettendorf, it is illegal for liquor stores to place advertisements for beer outside the store. 2)In Mount Vernon, a person first must obtain written permission from the City Council before throwing bricks into a highway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was asked to open up the coffee shop on Monday. So, the blonde went in early to open up. She gathered all the ingredients together, and had everything ready for the customers. Half an hour went by, and still no customers entered the coffee shop. The blonde decided to read the comics to pass the time. An hour later, her co-worker came in late as the blonde was still reading the comics. "Why does the sign say closed?" the co-worker asked the blonde. The blonde looked up from her comics, "Nah uh. It doesn''t say closed. Look right there," she said pointing at the sign. "See, it says open."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A good marriage would be between a blind woman, and a deaf man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wal-mart is planning on opening fifty new stores in areas that are blighted. Ironically, the official definition of blighted is what happens to an area when Wal-mart opens a store nearby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack: Why did you name your pig Paris Hilton? Jill: She''s always trying to hog up all the attention.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo dadda liked women until he saw yo momma.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mom''s favorite joke, played on some radio station. ORIGINAL JOKE: Johnny- Mother, can I have another piece of cake? Mother- Yes, you may have more cake, but if you do, you''ll explode! Well, Johnny ate another piece of cake and sure enough, he exploded. RIDDLE: What sits next to mother, eats cake and explodes? Give up? JOHNNY! FORGET PUNCHLINE: You- Johnny asks mother if he can have another piece of cake. Mother says yes, but if you do, you''ll explode.So then Johnny er... Johnny um Johnnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy erm listens to mother?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is funny', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. - Henny Youngman', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a dog have fur? ''Cause if he didn''t he''d be a little "bare"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen? --------------------- 54. Two in the front, two in the back, and fifty in the ashtray. What is the difference between a large pizza and a Jew? --------------------- The large pizza won''t scream when you put it in the oven.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a black man and a large pizza? -------------- a large pizza can feed a family of four What do sperm and black men have in common? -------------- only one in a million work!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Alaska A law in Fairbanks does not allow moose to have sex on city streets. (O_o) Even though it is legal to hunt a bear, it is illegal to wake a bear for photo opportunities. (is shooting waking?) Fairbanks: It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose. (but why?) In Alaska it is illegal to whisper in someone''s ear while they are moose hunting. It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane. (How did the moose get in the flippin plane?) Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time. Moose may not be viewed from an airplane. State policy states that emergencies are held to a minimum and rarely found to exist. (*911* "we are sorry, this number has been disconnected")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a drive-by shooting in Chinatown? A cappuchino.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid, when you asked her for an evening gown, she came back with a night dress!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many snobby girls does it take to change a lightbulb? All of them, they try, break a nail, and come crying home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a bunny''s favorite type of dance? Hip Hop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where do whales go to get their teeth checked? To the orcadontis!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Johnny''s math book sad? It had too many problems!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day after a birthday party at the jumper house, a young blond told her mother: Mommy, Mommy, I''m soooooo generous! When I was about to go into the jumpers, I found so many shoes and took them to the lost and found! Aren''t I soooooo generous?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey this is not a joke. Just submit a full smiley just for the heck of it. Wouldn''t it be weird if the top joke wasn''t even a joke? So please, just give it a full smiley. If you think this is just stupid, then, please give this crap a zero smiley.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: What are you doing? John: Taxes. Joe: Why? John: Because I have to...... Joe: That''s stupid. I did mine over a year ago.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was walking around town with a frog growing out of his head. Another man walks up to him and ask him, "What happened to you?" The frog answered, "Well, it started as a wart on my ass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy walks into his parents'' room and sees his parents having sex. "And you smack me for sucking on my thumb, Mommy?!?", the boy exclaims. A little boy asks his mom where babies come from. "Well from the stork," Mom replies. "So then who fucks the stork?", The kid asks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock- Knock Who''s There? Kenya Kenya Who? Kenya eat me out?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob: I''m going to go ride my spaceship. Jack: What''s a spaceship? Bob: Dunno, I''ll go invent it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man told the ringmaster that he was interested in joining the circus as a lion tamer. The ringmaster asked if he had any experience. The man said, "Why, yes. My father was one of the most famous lion tamers in the world, and he taught me everything he knew." "Really?" said the ringmaster. "Did he teach you how to make a lion jump through a flaming hoop?" "Yes he did," the man replied. "And did he teach you how to have six lions form a pyramid?" "Yes he did," the man replied. "And have you ever stuck your head in a lion''s mouth?" "Just once," the man replied. The ringmaster asked, "Why only once?" The man said, "I was looking for my father."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny comes back from school crying and says, "Mommy all the kids in the school say I have a big head." His mother replies, "No you don''t Johnny. You have a hideously deformed head. The other children are merely hiding the truth to protect your feelings."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a pet shop looking for an exotic pet. The owner tells the man, "we have iguanas...". The Man says, "No, I am looking for something really different. Everyone has iguanas, snakes, fish, and spiders!" The owner of the shop then tells the man that he has a talking centipede. The man gets excited; and says, "I''ll take it!" On the way home, the man tries to make small talk with the centipede; but he gets no response. He just figures the thing is shy. Once they get home, the man has an idea; and asks the centipede if he wants to go to the bar with him. No response. He gets agitated and taps the centipede''s box pretty hard. "I said; Do you want to go to the bar with me?!?!" After a couple of seconds, the centipede yells, "Hold on! I''m putting my fucking shoes on!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two jackrabbits are running from a pack of coyotes they manage to hide under a cactus. One says to the other: "Should we run for it, or wait till we outnumber ''em?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lovely young lady named Kim Went down to the river to swim A man in a punt Stuck an oar in her eye And now she has to wear glasses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Sometimes stays in bed until after 5 am. 9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women without bonnets. 8. Shows up at barn raisings in full ''KISS'' makeup. 7. When you criticize him, he yells, "Thou sucketh." 6. His name is Jebediah, but he goes by "Jeb Daddy." 5. Defiantly says, "If I had a radio, I''d listen to rap." 4. You come upon his secret stash of colored socks. 3. Uses slang expression, "Talk to the hand, ''cause the beard ain''t listening." 2. Was recently pulled over for driving under the influence of cottage cheese. AND THE #1 REASON YOU''LL KNOW YOUR TEENAGE AMISH SON IS IN TROUBLE IS: 1. He''s wearing his big black hat BACKWARDS!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man into a whorehouse. Once in the room with the prostitute, he puts $50 on the table and drops his pants. The hooker almost faints; the guy has a 18 inch cock. She says, "Hold on pal, I''ll lick it, I''ll suck it, but you''re not sticking that in me." The man pulls up his pants, picks up his $50, and says, "Screw that, I can do that myself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlahBlah PAY ME LOTS MONEY Sign for pain here______________________', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With a man soon to celebrate his 50th wedding anniversary at the church''s marriage marathon, the minister asked Pete to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he managed to maintain his marriage with the same woman all these years. The husband replied to the audience, "Well, I treated her with respect, spent money on her, but mostly I took her traveling on special occasions." The minister inquired "Trips to where?" "For our 25th anniversary, I took her to Beijing, China." The minister then said, "What a terrific example you are to all husbands, Pete. Please tell the audience what you''re going to do for your wife on your 50th anniversary." Pete: "I''m going back to go get her."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were in the bathroom getting ready for work when the husband looked at his wife and said, "I gotta have you!" He backed her up against the bathroom door, pulled down her panties and ravaged her. He knew he was doing great because she screamed and wiggled more than she ever had before. When he finished, he started putting his clothes back on when he noticed his wife still writhing against the door. He said, "That was the best honey. You''ve never moved like that before, you didn''t hurt yourself did you?" His wife replies, "No, no. I''ll be okay once I get the doorknob out of my ass."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy asks his dad, "What is the difference between confident and confidential?" Dad says, "You are my son, I''m confident about that. Your friend over there is also my son; that''s confidential!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('jkfsh', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear that TGI Fridays is opening a new restaurant? "Yeah, it''s called WTF Mondays."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the blonde dance in front of the traffic light? Because she thought she was in a disco.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl: "Have you ever been caught been wearing your mother''s bra? Boy: "No!" Girl: "So you have worn them but not been caught?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The GOP Congress will re-introduce drilling for oil in the Arctic. Republicans say the environmental effect is minimal; a study shows caribou do not make campaign contributions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe: Hey Frank, what do you call an Iraqi on a plane? Frank: Hmm, terrorist bomber? Hell on air? Death on two wings? Joe: No, a pilot you racist!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A primary school teacher decided to see how many of the city kids knew what sounds farm animals made. She asked the kids to put their hands up if they knew the correct sound. "Who knows what sound a cow makes?" she asked. Cindy put her hand up and said "Moooo!" "Very good" replied the teacher,"what sound do sheep make?" "Baaaa" answered Jimmy. She continued this for a while. Then she asked, "What sound does a pig make?" All the hands in the class went up. She was surprised at the response. She chose Little Johnny at the back of the class. He stood up, took a deep breath, and screamed, "Up against the wall you son of a bitch!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-Archimedes, you are late again. Don''t tell me that you were locked again in the bathroom. -Copernicus, when will you understand that you are not the center of the world? -Galileo, if you will drop stones from the top of the tower one more time, you will ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The new principal was talking to the teachers. "Now, listen, my name is Mr. Prenis, with an "R". Please don''t forget to spell it out clearly, so that the students dont laugh and such..." The teachers assure him that they will remember it, and they go out to adress the students. One of the male teachers steps up to the podium, and speaks into the microphone: "Welcome, students, to another year at Rearview Elementary. I would like you to welcome your new principal, Mr. Crock..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are sitting in a bar. The one says to the other, "Are you going to the Johnsons'' tonight?" The other says, "Dunno, I don''t feel like it, but my wife wants to." "Yeah, me too, I don''t feel like it, but my wife insists." Both of them sigh deeply, look at each other and say: "All right then. See you at the Johnsons''!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On one side of the world, a man is given a blowjob by a 80-year-old woman. On the other side of the world, a stuntman attempts the unattemptable: Tiptoeing on a stretched cord between two skyscrapers. What are they both thinking? "Don''t look down, don''t look down, don''t look down, don''t look down..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An armless man in a long jacket walks into a bathroom and stands by a urinal... Soon seeing he needs help to use the toilet he asks a close by man, "Can you help me point my penis?" The man reluctantly accepted but decided not to look at the man''s penis. After a few seconds of holding it he thinks, "Hey! I''m grabbing it right? So I should look, I have a right" He looks down at the man''s member and sees that is beyond hideous. Startled, he jumps back and lets go, asking, "What the hell is wrong with it?" The "armless" man pulls his arms out of his jacket and says "I dunno, but I ain''t touchin'' it," and walks away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The drunk was floundering down the alley carrying a box with holes on the side. He bumped into a friend who asked, "What do you have in there, pal?" "A mongoose." "What for?" "Well, you know how drunk I can get. When I get drunk I see snakes, and I''m scared to death of snakes. That''s why I got this mongoose, for protection." "But," the friend said, "you idiot! Those are imaginary snakes." "That''s okay," said the drunk, showing his friend the interior of the box, "So is the mongoose."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the nursing home to visit his 84 year-old father. While there he notices the nurse is giving his father hot chocolate and Viagra. The man asks, "Why are you doing that? I mean, at his age what will it do for him?" The nurse explains, "The hot chocolate will help him sleep." The man says, "And the Viagra?" "Keeps him from falling out of bed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest boy what he''d like to eat. "I''ll have some fuckin'' French toast," he says. The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs. She asks the middle child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more fuckin'' French toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away. Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast. "I don''t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don''t want the fuckin'' French toast."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hello, and welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2. If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5 and 6. If you are paranoid-delusional...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob: Did you get the tickets? Fred: What tickets? Bob: To the Gun Show! Well, let''s see now, I think they''re both pretty good, but...this one has it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('True Story: My aunt and her son were coming to our house to view an old slide show of London. Currently, my aunt has grey hair. In the slides she had black hair. My dad tells my cousin, "See, your mother doesn''t look old here." He replies, "Well, you can also see when the Hampton Court Palace was new."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bob: How do you keep a turkey in suspense? Willie: I dunno. Bob: I''ll tell you later...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sven was in front of the mall jewellery store when he spied Ole walking past carrying a small, gift-wrapped package. "So vat did ja buy, Ole?" Ole replied, "Tomorrow is Lena''s birthday and she said she vanted something wit lots of diamonds." "So vat did you get her?" asked Sven. "A deck of cards!" replied Ole. - Editor: Ole''s funeral services will be held later this week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ah...all the good things we get out of electricity: the T.V., computer, coffee machine, lights, and much more. What happens when the electricity goes out? You stop complaining that you can''t watch T.V. or send an E-mail, and go buy battery-powered things!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is no job so simple that it cannot be done wrnog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knocked several times, but you weren''t in. - Opportunity', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If an item is advertised as "under $50", you can bet it''s not $19.95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If flattery gets you nowhere, try bribery.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If people listened to themselves more often, they would talk less.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If we learn by our mistakes, some of us are getting one great education!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Men can live without air for a few minutes, without water for a few days, without food for about two months, and without new thoughts for years on end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student said to Professor Stigler: "Professor Stigler, I don''t believe I deserve this F you''ve given me." To which Stigler replied, "I agree, but unfortunately it is the lowest grade the University will allow me to award."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend of mine was a frequent user of a pay telephone at a popular truck stop, and was greatly inconvenienced when the phone went out of commission. Repeated requests for repair brought only promises. After several days, the phone company was again contacted and told that there was no longer a rush. The phone was now working fine - except that all money was being returned upon completion of each call. A repairman arrived within the hour!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A motorist, driving by a Texas ranch, hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. The driver went to the owner of the calf and explained what had happened. He then asked what the animal was worth. "Oh, about $200 today," said the rancher. "But in six years it would have been worth $900, so $900 is what I''m out." The motorist sat down and wrote out a check and handed it to the farmer. "Here," he said, "is the check for $900. It''s postdated six years from now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wealthy investor walked into a bank and said to the bank manager, "I would like to speak with Mr. Reginald Jones, whom I understand is a tried and trusted employee of yours." The banker said, "Yes, he certainly was trusted, and he will be tried as soon as we catch him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple who lived together were talking one day, trying to figure out how to entertain themselves on a rainy day. "Let''s play Hide and Seek," said the woman. "I''ll hide and if you find me we''ll have sex!" "But what if I can''t find you?" asked her boyfriend. "I''ll be behind the piano," she said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The stockbroker received notice from the IRS that he was being audited. He showed up at the appointed time and place with all his financial records, then sat for what seemed like hours as the accountant pored over them. Finally the IRS agent looked up and commented, "You must have been a tremendous fan of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle." "Why would you say that?" wondered the broker. "Because you''ve made more brilliant deductions on your last three returns than Sherlock Holmes made in his entire career."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Polish guys were taking their first train trip to Warsaw on the train. A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas which they''d never seen before. Each bought one. The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, he looked across to his friend and said, "I wouldn''t eat that if I were you." "Why not?" "I took one bite and went blind for half a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Original Lyric Put your left foot in, Your left foot out, Your left foot in, And shake it all about. You do the hokey pokey, And turn yourself around That''s what it''s all about. Shakespearean Style. O proud left foot, that ventures quick within, Then soon upon a backward journey lithe. Anon, once more the gesture, then begin: Command sinistral pedestal to writhe. Commence thou then the fervid Hokey-Poke; A mad gyration, hips in wanton swirl. To spin! A wilde release from heaven''s yoke. Blessed dervish! Surely canst go, girl. The Hoke, the poke - banish now thy doubt. Verily, I say, ''tis what it''s all about.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('From Harper''s Magazine: Amount of pizza eaten each day in U.S. (acres): 75.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On April Fools Day, a mother put a fire cracker under the pancakes. She blew her stack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This last weekend I was reminded at the pace we are converting to metric. I was on I-75 in Ohio when I saw a sign that said: All signs metric - Next 20 miles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Leonid Brezhnev, a former ruler of Russia, was thought not to be too bright. He comes to address a big Communist party meeting, and starts: "Dear Comrade Imperialists," The whole hall perked up - "what did he say?" Brezhnev tried again... "Dear Comrade Imperialists," Well, by now the hall was in pandemonium - was he trying to call them Imperialists? Then, an advisor walked over to the podium and pointed to the speech for Brezhnev. "Oh..." he muttered, and started again: "Dear Comrades, Imperialists are everywhere."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of my husband''s duties as a novice drill instructor at Fort Jackson, S.C., was to escort new recruits to the mess hall. After everyone had made it through the chow line, he sat them down and told them, "There are three rules in this mess hall: Shut up! Eat up! Get up!" Checking to see that he had everyone''s attention, he asked, "What is the first rule?" Much to the amusement of the other instructors, 60 privates yelled in unison, "Shut up, Drill Sergeant!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s There. Pick up. Pick up Who? Pick up your truck and I''ll grab the money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- Your local ambulance has a trailer hitch. - You watch cartoons long after your kids get bored. - You think the French Riviera is a foreign car. - You think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard. - You''re still sca', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The wise old Mother Superior from county Tipperary was dying. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her comfortable. They gave her some warm milk to drink, but she refused it. Then one nun took the glass back to the kitchen. Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey they had received as a gift the previous Christmas, she opened and poured a generous amount into the warm milk. When she walked back at Mother Superior''s bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother drank a little, then a little more. Before they knew it, she had drunk the whole glass down to the last drop. "Mother," the nuns asked with earnest, "please give us some wisdom before you die." She raised herself up in bed with a pious look on her face and said, "Don''t sell that cow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teenage son was having trouble mastering the fine points of balancing his new checking account. "The bank returned the check you wrote to the sporting goods store," his mother said. "Oh good," he replied, "Now I can use it to buy some stereo equipment!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been married for 45 years and had raised a brood of 11 children and were blessed with 22 grandchildren. When asked the secret for staying together all that time, the wife replies, "Many years ago we made a promise to each other: the first one to pack up and leave has to take all the kids."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your momma''s teeth are so yellow, that when she opened her mouth, a black guy said "nice grillz!" Your momma''s so fat ''n hairy that when she went to the mueseum someone yelled "the mammoth''s alive!" Your momma''s so hairy that when she was on the set of king kong, the director said "I thought I only ordered 1 gorrila!" Your momma''s so old and gassy that when she farted the dinasours became extinct! Your momma''s so stupid that they invented the books for dummys just for her! Your momma''s so skinny that god used her to clean his teeth! Your momma''s so ugly that when she stepped out of her house, people ran away saying "I didn''t know they were shooting a horror movie here!" Your momma''s so ugly that when walked down her street someone said "lady, halloween was yesterday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After all is said and done, usually more is said than done.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A clean tie attracts the soup of the day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t lend people money...it gives them amnesia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy comes home from school saying, "3rd grade math has way bigger numbers than 2nd grade!" His dad replies, "Don''t worry, when you start getting a paycheck they get smaller again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you use your rollaway tool box for your bedroom dresser. If you are afraid to mow your lawn because you might find out where Grandma''s been for the last two months.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All inanimate objects can move just enough to get in your way.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Any wire cut to length will be too short.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Blessed is he who expects no gratitude, for he shall not be disappointed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly when she walks in a room mice jump on chairs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Be content with what you''ve got, but be sure you''ve got plenty of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The chance of forgetting something is directly proportional to...to...uhh...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s not what you say, but the way you say it. On a blind date, the boy said to the girl: "Time stands still when I look into your eyes." The girl was very flattered. What the boy had really meant was, "You have a face that would stop a clock."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One of the greatest labor-saving inventions today is tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two kinds of people who don''t say much: those who are quiet and those who talk a lot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No matter what happens, there is always somebody who knew that it would.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Policeman: "When I saw you coming around the corner, I said to myself, `fifty-five at least.''" Woman driver: "Well, you are a long way off! It''s this hat that makes me look so old!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is a dangerous virus being passed around electronically, orally, and by hand. This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life completely. If you should come into contact with WORK, put your jacket on and take two good friends to the nearest grocery store. Purchase the antidote known as Work-Isolating-Neutralizer-Extract (WINE) or Bothersome-Employer-Elimination-Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system. You should forward this warning to five friends. If you do not have five friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest was preparing a man for his long journey into the night. Whispering firmly, the priest said, "Denounce the devil! Let him know how little you think of his evil." The dying man said nothing. The priest repeated his order. Still the dying man said nothing. The priest asked, "Why do you refuse to denounce the devil and his evil?" The dying man said, "Until I know where I''m heading, I don''t think I ought to aggravate anybody."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What''ve you got in your truck?" "Fertilizer," the farmer replied. "What are you going to do with it?" asked the little boy. "Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer. "You ought to live here," the little boy advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The road by my house was in bad condition. Every day, I dodged potholes on the way to work, so I was relieved to see a construction crew working on the road one morning. Later, on my way home, I noticed the men were gone and no improvement in the road. Where the crew had been working stood a new, bright-yellow sign with the words, "Rough Road."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two rules for success in life: Rule 1 - Don''t tell people everything you know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that there are so many more horses'' asses than there are horses? - G. Gordon Liddy', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can fool all of the people some of the time, some of the people all of the time, and that should be sufficient for most purposes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can make a fool of yourself any time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think it''s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman from Chelm went to the market one day to buy herring and a loaf of bread. "How much is it?" she asked the storekeeper. "14 cents," answered the storekeeper to the lady. "14 cents! For what?" asked the lady. The storekeeper explained: "The herring costs 7 cents, and the loaf of bread costs 7 cents also. So together it comes to 14 cents." "I know different. To the best of my recollection, 7 and 7 is 11." "What are you saying?" "As far as I know, 7 and 7 is 11. I had already had 4 children when my first husband died. When I married a second time, my second husband also had 4 children from his first wife. After getting married, we had 3 children together. So each of us had 7 children, and together we had 11! Obviously, 7 and 7 is 11."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old men were arguing the merits of their doctors. The first one said, "I don''t trust your fancy doctor. He treated old Jake Waxman for a kidney ailment for nearly a year, and then Jake died of a liver ailment." "So what makes you think your doctor is any better?" asked his friend. "Because when my doctor treats you for a kidney ailment, you can be sure you''ll die of a kidney ailment."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A friend and I stayed at a Chicago hotel while attending a convention. Since we weren''t used to the big city, we were overly concerned about security. The first night we placed a chair against the door and stacked our luggage on it. To complete the barricade, we put the trash can on top. If an intruder tried to break in, we''d be sure to hear him. Around 1 a.m. there was a knock on the door. "Who is it?" my friend asked nervously. "Honey," a woman on the other side yelled, "you left your key in the door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is sitting on a bench in the park reading a newspaper. Suddenly he throws the paper onto the ground and yells, "All politicians are assholes." A man sitting next to him in a finely pressed suit says, "I take offense to that!" The pissed-off guy asks him, "Why? Are you a politician?" "No," he replies, "I''m an asshole."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the university, the lecturers were entering their classes. Meanwhile, the students were doing their own stuff. When the lecturer said,"Class, attention please!" all of them still did something else. Of course they didn''t pay attention because the lecturer asked the CLASS to pay attention!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend and I were in a record store to buy a 45-speed record of his favourite song. After he located it, he realized that he had forgotten his wallet. Instead of going out and getting his wallet, he decided to get a five-finger discount (shoplift) so he put it down his pants. Well, as we were leaving the store, the cashier stopped him and said, "Excuse me, but is that a record in your pants?" To this he responded, "It may not be a record, but I''m mighty proud of it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overweight is something that just sort of snacks up on you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four teenagers were arrested in the parking lot of a large mall in Lakeland, Fla. just before Christmas. In an attempt to steal an automobile at random, they tried to break into a police van containing three officers on a stakeout.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A co-worker of mine fielded phone calls from his Alumni Association every three months for about five years, ostensibly checking to see that his records were up to date, and coincidentally asking if he''d like to donate to the Alumni Association. Once, when checking his records, the employee asked, "Is xxx-xxxx your current phone number?" Seeing his opportunity, he answered no, and made up a new phone number. He hasn''t heard from them since.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The song, "Yankee Doodle" was originally sung by British soldiers to insult the colonialists (which was typical of the British in those days). The Continental Army took to singing it to annoy the British (which was typical of the colonialists).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('St. Paul, MN The hit movie "Home Alone" about a boy thwarting burglars with imaginative mayhem, wasn''t total fantasy. Just ask the guy who tried to break in while 13-year-old Ryan Hendrickson was home alone. Ryan was watching television Wednesday night when he heard a noise that sounded like a window screen being cut. "I ran to the closet and grabbed a bat," Ryan said Thursday. "I went...into the dining room, where I saw him cutting the window with a knife. He put his left hand in first and I was waiting for his right hand to come in...and I took the baseball bat and I hit him as hard as I could." The man ran. Ryan called 911. Police, while cautioning Ryan to call 911 first next time, did enjoy the fact that the kid got in the first lick against a bad guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('New York, NY Police across the nation are warning people who wear pagers to be on the lookout for the latest scam. According to police, pagers in several states have been beeped by a number displaying a 212 area code (New York) and the prefix 540. When the victims return the call, they are charged $55 on their phone bill. The call the respondent makes has been electronically linked into a 900 "pay-per-call" system which allows the charge to be added to the phone bill. "People will look at the number and say ''Gee, who is calling me from out of state? It must be important,''" said an investigator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bellevue, WA There''s a story circulating through the Bellevue School District about the woman who called wanting information on home schooling. Both Lake Washington (Renton, WA) and Bellevue districts are noted for their support of home schoolers, and the Bellevue spokesperson was explaining procedures and what to do to the mother on the telephone. Among other things, the mother needed to file a declaration of intent, a kind of home school registration. The spokeswoman offered to send out the proper form. The mother gave a Renton address. The spokeswoman suggested registering the children in her home district in Renton, the Lake Washington School District. "No way," said the mother. "Everyone knows Bellevue schools are much better than Renton schools."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kenneth Jeffries, 24, was arrested in West Haven, Conn., in August for robbing a convenience store. Police reported that he had first offered the clerk $1 for a pack of gum as a ruse and then taken $40 in the robbery. However, said police, Jeffries returned a minute later and asked, uncertainly, "Did I pay for the gum?" By that time the clerk had summoned police, and Jeffries was soon apprehended.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three roommates: a blonde, brunette, and redhead all go out on dates one night. When they get back in the blonde says, "You know you''ve been on a good date when your make-up is all smeared!" The brunette says, "No, no, you know you''ve been on a good date when you come home and your hair is all messed up." The redhead doesn''t say anything she just reaches up under her skirt, pulls off her panties, and throws them against the wall, where they stick, and says, "NOW THAT''S A GOOD DATE!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, what did one Bowling pin say to the other Bowling pin? ............................ Hey, you''re a knock out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a pretty lady was driving through the desert and her car broke down. In the distance, she sees an indian riding a horse. He rides over to her and offers her a lift to the nearest gas station and she happily accepts. On the way to the gas station, the indian would let out a, "Woo Hoo, Yipee!" every few seconds. The lady just figured that he was being an Indian and ignored it. When they finally got to the gas station and the Indian had left, the guy that worked at the gas station asked, "What was his problem?" The lady responded, "I don''t know, I was just holding onto his saddle horn." The guy replied, "Lady, Indians don''t use saddles!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the magic car? It turned into a driveway!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My health teacher said once he was talking to this one guy and a student. As they were talking the student got curious and asked, "How long have you been teaching here?" My health teachser replied, "Oh about 37 years." The student said he must be old and the other guy, who is elderly as well says, "Ya, and Jesus still owes me a buck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Price Chopper employees does it take to wash a table? Three; one to wash it and two to supervise.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I''m canoeing up a tree, how many cupcakes does it take to get to the moon? None, since vests don''t have sleeves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Hubluzas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? There is no lightbulb!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit? Are children who act in rated ''R'' movies allowed to see them? Can you make a candle out of your earwax? When French people swear do they say pardon my English? Aren''t the ''good things that come to those who wait'' just the leftovers from the people that got there first? If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later? Can a fire truck park in the fire lane? Can it be cloudy and foggy at the same time? "Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute? Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time? Are marbles made of marble? Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup? If you pay for a vacation and your plane crashes on the way there, do you get you money back? (Granted you lived) Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think that''s how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York said, "Gee, I''m enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn''t cold enough. Let''s go west."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rhett Jacobs, Democratic candidate for the South Carolina House and a man who listed "education" as his top priority, submitted a required campaign disclosure form in October, handwritten, on which he detailed expenses for "filling fee," "campain work" and "litature."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the plane was flying low over hills near Athens, a lady asked the stewardess: "What''s that stuff on those hills?" "Just snow," replied the stewardess. "That''s what I thought," said the lady, "but this fellow in front of me said it was Greece."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, someone phoned Central Manhattan Office. Caller: Good afternoon. I''m John Smith. Operator: GOOD AFTERNOON! CAN I HELP YOU? Caller: Who are you? Why are you so rude? Operator: WHO ARE YOU LOOKING FOR? Caller: I am looking for my sister, Gabrielle Smith. She works here, right? Operator: SHE IS IN THE TOILET! Caller: Okay. Now I want to know who you are. Why are you so rude? Operator: I''M SAW LEE! Caller: Oh, you should be sorry because you are so rude! Then the caller hung up the phone. *Try to pronounce "SAW LEE". It sounds like "SORRY", right?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This story is true. I heard my brother tell it to my cousins when we went out spotlighting. Well my brother and 2 of his friends were drunk. One of my brothers friends were so drunk he passed out. I forget what he landed on, but the power went out. The blond comes screaming "What''s happening??!!" my brother and his other friend reply,"The house is falling down!!" So the blond runs to the door and pushes up on the doorway, and turns beet red. I don''t know the erst of the story because my brother had just remembered I was in the car. He knew I would tell mom everything he said that was bad because I''m 12.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Buy company, fire them. Beware of machine guns.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good friends are the ones who will bail you out of jail. But... TRUE friends are the ones who wil be sitting next to you in prison and say, "You know, we sure messed up there, buddy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer in Basic Math class "What is two plus two?" "Well, first let us decide the parties. The first two is party A. Now first, where are the signatures that my client two WANTS to be added to the party B, two. I see no signatures, and therefore the two twos shan''t be together until further paperwork is done. Two and two remain separate, CASE CLOSED!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does a sperm bank treat its donors? On a first come, first serve basis.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat and so pale white, when they landed on her they said "This is one small step for man, and one fat leap for mankind!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For those of you who do not know, a stroop test is where you say the color of the word, but not the word itself(and the words are spelling out colors). One day there was a blonde. She saw stroop tests and found them fun. One day she was on a radio show. She said she was a fan of stroop tests and said she''d give the audience one. She explained what it was. "Blue" "Red" "Green" The first to call and give the answers would win a cash prize. Someone called in. "YOU MORON! YOU CANT SPEAK A STROOP TEST!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A U.S. Mint spokesperson announced the plans for a new fifty-cent piece that was being issued in the honor of two great American patriots. On one side of the coin would be Theodore Roosevelt, on the other, Nathan Hale. When questioned by a reporter why two people were going to appear on the same coin, the spokesperson replied, "These two men were selected to simplify life for a vast majority of Americans." The reporter then asked, "Could you explain how this would simplify life for Americans?" The official responded, "Certainly, I''d be happy to. Now, when they toss a coin, they can simply call Ted''s or Hale''s."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The businessman dragged himself home and barely made it to his chair before he dropped, exhausted. His sympathetic wife was right there with a tall cool drink and a comforting word. "My, you look tired," she said. "You must have had a hard day today. What happened to make you so exhausted?" "It was terrible," her husband said, "The computer broke down and all of us had to do our own thinking."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A number twelve walks into a bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer. "Sorry I can''t serve you," states the barman. "Why not?!" asks the number twelve with anger showing in its voice. "You''re under 21," replies the barman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the cow cross the street? To get to the udder side!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a one-legged lady? Eileen!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which animal has no teeth? A gummy bear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This man comes home feeling pretty frisky after partying with his buddies half the night. He walks into the bedroom where his wife is still waiting up for him. He takes off all of his clothes and says, "Baby, you are looking at 200 pounds of dynamite." His wife opens the window and yells, "Everybody run for your lives, there''s 200 pounds of dynamite in my bedroom, and it only has a three inch fuse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American manufacturer is showing his machine factory to a potential customer from Albania. At noon, when the lunch whistle blows, two thousand men and women immediately stop work and leave the building. "Your workers, they''re escaping!" cries the visitor. "You''ve got to stop them." "Don''t worry, they''ll be back," says the American. And indeed, at exactly one o''clock the whistle blows again, and all the workers return from their break. When the tour is over, the manufacturer turns to his guest and says, "Well, now, which of these machines would you like to order?" "Forget the machines," says the visitor. "How much do you want for that whistle?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large, raging violent river. Needing to get on the other side, the first man prayed, "God, please give me the strength to cross the river." Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours, having almost drowned twice. After witnessing that, the second man prayed, "God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river." Poof! God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs and he was able to row across in about an hour after almost capsizing once. Seeing what happened to the first two men, the third man prayed, "God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river." Poof! He was turned into a woman. She checked the map, hiked one hundred yards up stream and walked across the bridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so stupid she tried to drown a fish.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell an elephant from an ant? An ant is easier to pick up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell when a blonde is having a bad day? She has her tampon behind her ear and she cant find her pencil!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do bald men put holes in their pockets? So they can run their fingers through their hair!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you know when a blonde is on her period? A: She only has on one sock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner. After some wheeling and dealing, they settled for $10,000 for the duck and the pot. Three days later the circus owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your duck is a ripoff! I put him on the pot before a whole audience, and he didn''t dance a single step!" "So?" asked the duck''s former owner, "did you remember to light the candle under the pot?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who smelled like a distillery flopped on a subway seat next to a priest. The man''s tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes, the disheveled guy turned to the priest and asked, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?" "Mister, it''s caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow man." "Well I''ll be," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper. The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. "I''m very sorry. I didn''t mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?" "I don''t have it, Father; I was just reading here that the Pope does."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A regular at Bob''s Bar came in one evening sporting a matched pair of swollen black eyes that appeared extremely painful. "Whoa, Sam!" said the bartender. "Who gave those beauties to you?" "Nobody gave them to me," said Sam. "I had to fight like crazy for both of them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the aliens hurt the farmer? They trod on his corn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An office technician got a call from a blonde. The blonde told the tech that her computer was not working. She described the problem and the tech concluded that the computer needed to be brought in and serviced. He told her to "Unplug the power cord and bring it up here and I will fix it." About fifteen minutes later she shows up at his door with the power cord in her hand.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man had been drinking at the bar for hours when he mentioned something about his girlfriend being out in the car. The bartender, concerned because it was so cold, went to check on her. When he looked inside the car, he saw the man''s friend, Dave, and his girlfriend kissing one another. The bartender shook his head and walked back inside. He told the drunk that he thought it might be a good idea to check on his girlfriend. The fellow staggered outside to the car, saw his buddy and his girlfriend kissing, then walked back into the bar laughing. "What''s so funny?" the bartender asked. "That stupid Dave!" the fellow chortled, "He''s so drunk, he thinks he''s me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyers are safe from the threat of automation taking over their professions. No one would build a robot to do nothing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two deaf men were in a coffee shop discussing their wives. One signs to the other, ''Boy was my wife mad at me last night. She went on and on and wouldn''t stop!'' The other Buddy says, ''When my wife goes off on me I just don''t listen.'' ''How do you do that?'' says the other. ''It''s easy! I turn off the light!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Private Loyds was brought up before the unit CO for some offense. "You can take your choice, private - one month''s restriction or twenty days'' pay," said the officer. "All right, sir," said the bright soldier, "I''ll take the money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: Doctor, what I need is something to stir me up; something to put me in a fighting mood. Did you put something like that in this prescription? Doctor: No need for that. You will find that in your bill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police car pulled me over near the high school where I teach. As the officer asked for my license and registration, my students began to drive past. Some honked their horns, others hooted, and still others stopped to admonish me for speeding. Finally the officer asked me if I was a teacher at the school, and I told him I was. "I think you''ve paid your debt to society," he said with a smile, and left without giving me a ticket.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Schwarznegger has a big one, Michael J. Fox has a small one, Madonna doesn''t have one, The POPE has one but doesn''t use it, Clinton uses his all the time, Mickey Mouse has an unusual one, George Burns'' was hot, Liberace NEVER used his on women, Jerry Seinfeld is very very proud of his, We never saw Lucy use Desi''s. What is it? A last name....... Were you thinking of something else?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Astronomers were excited this week at having isolated a brief sound which occurred immediately before the Big Bang. Apparently, that sound was "Uh oh."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the bus pulled away, I realized I had left my purse under the seat. Later, I called the company and was relieved that the driver had found my bag. When I went to pick it up, several off-duty bus drivers surrounded me. One man handed me my pocketbook, two typewritten pages and a box containing the contents of my purse. "We''re required to inventory lost wallets and purses," he explained. "I think you''ll find everything there." As I started to put my belongings back into the pocketbook, the man continued, "I hope you don''t mind if we watch. Even though we all tried, none of us could fit everything into your purse - and we''d like to see just how you do it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Kid: Mom, can i get the hot lunch tomorrow? Mom: What are they serving? Kid: Swiss steak. Pleeeeeease? Mom: Okay! Okay! I didn''t know you liked Swiss steak so much. Kid: Oh, yeah! It sticks to the ceiling WAY better than the lasagna.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A salesman, tired of his job, gave it up to become a policeman. Several months later, a friend asked him how he liked his new role. "Well," he replied, "the pay is good and the hours aren''t bad, but what I like best is that the customer is always wrong."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dave went on a business trip for a few days. When he returned, his wife reported that the dog really missed him. "She spent every night at the front door, waiting for you to come home," she said. "What an example of devotion," Dave replied. "I wonder if you''d be that concerned about me?" "Honey," she answered, "if you were gone overnight, and I didn''t know where you were, you can be sure I''d be waiting for you at the front door."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- You have a Hefty bag for a convertible top. - Your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds. - You have an Elvis Jell-o mold. - You own more cowboy boots than sneakers. - You''ve been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars. - You have a pic', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The orthopedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new office, and his staff was helping transport many of the items. I sat the display skeleton in the front of my car, and had fastened the seatbelt around it to stop it falling over. I hadn''t considered the drive across town. At one traffic light, the stares of the people in the car beside me became obvious, and I looked across and explained, "I''m delivering him to my doctor''s office." The other driver leaned out of his window. "I hate to tell you, man," he said, "but I think it''s too late!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an eagle with a jeep and a dog? A flying car-pet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nine cats were on a boat. One jumped off. How many were left? None. They were all copy-cats!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A poor man walks into a bar. Another man sat down 2 feet away from him, and pulled out a wad of $50s from his wallet. The poor man got an idea. He tells the rich man, "I have a special talent. I bet you all the money in your wallet I can sing a song with any woman''s name in it." The rich man laughed. "Alright. How about my wife''s name, Joanne Skyler Thomas?" What does the poor man sing? -_-_-_-_-_-_-_- Answer: "Happy Birthday" It''s a real song, and can have anyone''s name in it. The poor man walks away rich. The rich man walks away poor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting larger. Then it hit me...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country. March Planned For Next August Blind Bishop Appointed To See Lingerie Shipment Hijacked - Thief Gives Police The Slip L.A. Voters Approve Urban Renewal By Landslide Patient At Death''s Door - Doctors Pull Him Through Latin Course To Be Canceled - No Interest Among Students, Et Al. Diaper Market Bottoms Out Croupiers On Strike - Management: "No Big Deal" Stadium Air Conditioning Fails - Fans Protest', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country. Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped Lawyers Give Poor Free Legal Advice Fund Set Up for Beating Victim''s Kin Cancer Society Honors Marlboro Man Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe Out Literacy Autos Killing 110 a Day - Let''s Resolve to Do Better 20-Year Friendship Ends at Altar Half of U.S. High Schools Require Some Study for Graduation Blind Woman Gets New Kidney from Dad She Hasn''t Seen in Years', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CLASSIFIED ERRORS, from a small-town daily: (Monday) FOR SALE - R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Phone 555-0707 after 7 p.m. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap. (Tuesday) NOTICE - We regret having erred in R. D. Jones'' ad yesterday. It should have read: One sewing machine for sale. Cheap: 555-0707 and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him after 7 p.m. (Wednesday) NOTICE - R. D. Jones has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in his classified ad yesterday. His ad stands corrected as follows: FOR SALE - R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Cheap. Phone 555-0707 and ask Mrs. Kelly who loves with him. (Thursday) NOTICE - I, R. D. Jones, have NO sewing machine for sale. I SMASHED IT. Don''t call 555-0707, as the telephone has been disconnected. I have NOT been carrying on with Mrs. Kelly. Until yesterday she was my housekeeper, but she quit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the fish expelled from school? He was caught with seaweed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you''re swimming in the creek, and an eel bites your cheek, that''s a moray!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you''re just sitting there, staring at carpeting?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The trouble with doing nothing is that you never know when you are finished.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the tent agree to stand up all night? He was roped into it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the big knot give the little knot a time-out? It was being knotty!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Actual online ad: $10,000 06'' Suzuki GSXR 1000 Farmington, UT 84025 - Aug 7, 2006 2006 Suzuki 1000. This bike is perfect! It has 1000 miles and has had its 500 mile dealer service. (Expensive) It''s been adult ridden, all wheels have always been on the ground. I use it as a cruiser/commuter. I''m selling it because it was purchased without the proper consent of a loving wife. Apparently "do whatever the f*** you want" doesn''t mean what I thought. Call Pete, (xxx)xxx-xxxx', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, "Do you want to go to heaven?" The man said, "I do, Father." The priest said, "Then stand over there against the wall." Then the priest asked the second man, "Do you want to got to heaven?" "Certainly, Father," was the man''s reply. "Then stand over there against the wall," said the priest. Then Father Murphy walked up to O''Toole and said, "Do you want to go to heaven?" O''Toole said, "No, I don''t Father." The priest said, "I don''t believe this. You mean to tell me that when you die you don''t want to go to heaven?" O''Toole said, "Oh, when I die, yes. I thought you were getting a group together to go right now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man who had been caught embezzling millions from his employer went to a lawyer seeking defense. He didn''t want to go to jail, but his lawyer told him, "Don''t worry. You''ll never have to go to jail with all that money." The lawyer was right. When the man was sent to prison, he didn''t have a dime.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer named Impos Syble was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it. "Here lies an honest man and a lawyer," responded the lawyer. "Sorry, but I can''t do that," replied the stonecutter. "In this state, it''s against the law to bury two people in the same grave. However, I could put `here lies an honest lawyer''." "But that won''t let people know who it is!" protested the lawyer. "Sure it will," retorted the stonecutter. "People will read it and exclaim, "That''s impossible!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer calls his client to tell him about his fee schedule. "Alright," the lawyer says, looking through his papers. "You owe me $1000 down and $417.58 cents each month for the next thirty-six months." "What? That sounds like a car payment schedule," retorted the client. "You''re right. It''s mine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lawyer: "Now that you have been acquitted, will you tell me truly? Did you steal the car?" Client: "After hearing your amazing argument in court this morning, I''m beginning to think I didn''t."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can I ever thank you? gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubles. "My dear woman," Darrow replied, "ever since the Phoenicians invented money there has been only one answer to that question."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chuck Norris has two speeds - walk and kill. Chuck Norris sold law and order for using the names of his arms and legs. Chuck Norris hides his third arm underneath his beards. When Chuck Norris does a push up he is not pushing himself up, he is pushing the world down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was about to have a set of triplets. While in the womb, the triplets were trying to figure out what they wanted to be when they grew up. The first one said that he wanted to be an electrician, and the others asked him why. He said, "So I can get some light in this place." The second one said that he wanted to be a plumber, because their house was flooded. The third said that he wanted to be a trapper. The other two asked him why he wanted to do that and he said "So I can catch that damn weasel that keeps poking its head in and out of here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a nun that becomes an attorney? Sister in law!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At an exhibition of military painting a visitor was admiring a picture. "What a great realist that painter is!" he exclaimed. "What painter?" "The one that painted this picture ''Soldiers at Work''." "Yes, hut something is wrong there. Those soldiers aren''t working at all!" "That is just the greatest stroke of realism in the picture!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: What is the axis of the earth? Student: The axis of the earth is an imaginary line which passes from one pole to the other, and on which the earth revolves. Teacher: Very good. Now, could you hang clothes on that line? Student: Yes, Sir. Teacher: Indeed, and what sort of clothes? Student: Imaginary clothes, Sir.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man saw a very tired infantryman resting after a hard foot march. The man said with disdain: "When I was of your age I thought nothing of a ten-mile hike." "Well, I don''t think much of it either," replied the GI.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb? Into what?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two maggots were playing billiards. One says, "I''m bored." The other replies, "Beats fishing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t a dalmatian puppy hide from his mom? ''Cause he''s already been spotted!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My husband, being unhappy with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods. We''ve discovered that when I''m in a good mood it turns green. But when I''m in a bad mood it leaves a big red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time the cheap bastard will buy me a diamond!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A State Police colleague of mine once received a call from a woman who asked him how to baste a turkey. After a stunned moment, he, being a fairly good cook, described the procedure. Then he asked, "But why would you call the State Police to find out how to baste a turkey?" There was only a slight hesitation before she replied, "Well, you knew, didn''t you?" and hung up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man passed out in a dead faint as he came out of his front door onto the porch. Someone called 911. When the paramedics arrived, they helped him regain consciousness and asked if he knew what caused him to faint. "It was enough to make anybody faint," he said. "My son asked me for the keys to the garage, and instead of driving the car out, he came out with the lawn mower!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newspaper reporter was writing a feature story about prison life and was interviewing one of the prisoners. "Do you watch much television here?" "Only the daytime shows," the inmate said. "At night we''re locked in our cells and don''t see any television." "That''s too bad," the reporter said, "But I do think it is nice that the warden lets you watch it in the daytime." "What do you mean, nice?" the inmate said. "That''s part of the punishment."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After directory assistance gave me my boyfriend''s new telephone number, I dialed him -- and got a woman. "Is Mike there?" I asked. "He''s in the shower," she responded. "Please tell him his girlfriend called," I said and hung up. When he didn''t return the call, I dialed again. This time a man answered. "This is Mike," he said. "You''re not my boyfriend!" I exclaimed. "I know," he replied. "That''s what I''ve been trying to tell my wife for the past half-hour."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s no good, sir, said the hopeless pupil to his English teacher. "I try to learn, but everything you say goes in both ears and out the other." "Goes in both ears and out the other?" asked the puzzled teacher. "But you only have two ears." "You see, sir? I''m no good at math, either."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Haiku are funny But sometimes they don''t make sense Refrigerator', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Never smack a man who''s chewin'' tobacco.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To keep your marriage brimming With love in the marriage cup, Whenever you''re wrong, admit it; Whenever you''re right, shut up. - Nash', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends. "The man I marry must be a shining light amongst company. He must be musical, tell jokes, sing - and stay home at night!" An old granny overheard and spoke up, "Honey, if that''s all you want, get a television!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For thirty years, Johnson had arrived at work at 9 a.m. on the dot; he had never missed a day and was never late. Consequently, when on one particular day 9 a.m. passed without Johnson''s arrival, it caused a sensation. All work ceased, and the boss himself, looking at his watch and muttering, came out into the corridor. Finally, precisely at ten, Johnson showed up, clothes dusty and torn, his face scratched and bruised, his glasses bent. He limped painfully to the time clock, punched in, and said, aware that all eyes were upon him, "I tripped and rolled down two flights of stairs in the subway - nearly killed myself." The boss said, "And to roll down two flights of stairs took you a whole hour?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A musical director was having a lot of trouble with one drummer. He talked and talked and talked with the drummer, but his performance simply didn''t improve. Finally, before the whole orchestra, he said, "When a musician just can''t handle his instrument and doesn''t improve when given help, they take away the instrument, and give him two sticks, and make him a drummer." A stage whisper was heard from the percussion section: "And if he can''t handle even that, they take away one of his sticks and make him a conductor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Airman Jones was assigned to the induction center where he was to advise new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance. It wasn''t long before Captain Smith noticed that Airman Jones had almost a 100% record for insurance sales, something that had never happened before. Rather than ask about this, the Captain stood in the back of the room and listened to Jones''s sales pitch. Jones explained the basics of the GI Insurance to the new recruits, and then said: "If you have GI Insurance and go into battle and are killed, the government has to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries. If you don''t have GI insurance, and you go into battle and get killed, the government has to pay only a maximum of $6000." "Now," he concluded, "which bunch do you think they are going to send into battle first?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It might look like I''m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I''m really quite busy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someday, we''ll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Know It''s Your Last Day At Work When...... You hand a bank teller an envelope, and when she asks, "What''s this?", you realize you just dropped the company''s deposit in a mailbox. A woman comes into the store, you turn to the other salesman and say, "I waited on the last fat ugly old lady. This one''s your turn". Your boss is standing behind you. It''s his wife. While your boss is at lunch, you sneak in and look at some confidential information on his computer. You spill coffee on the keyboard. It shorts out. You return from a week''s vacation to find that you had scheduled *this* week as vacation, not last week. You take a "sick" day. The next morning the boss asks you, "So, how was the fishing on Rock Creek yesterday?" You wake up hung over. You have a black eye and barked knuckles. You''re in jail. Last night was the company Christmas party.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This reminds me of something yesterday at work. A colleague was relating a conversation he had with his young daughter, just a bit over 2 years old. They were discussing geography and... "Where does mommy live?" "Minneapolis." "Where does grandma live?" "Baltimore." "Where does grandpa live?" "Baltimore." "And where does daddy live?" "At work!" Needless to say, he took the next day off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chapters In The "Nascar For Dummies" Book: How To Read It''s Impossible to Own Too Much Dale Earnhardt Memorabilia Jumpin'', Hollerin'' & Other Ways to Make Sure Your Favorite Driver Sees You When He Goes By at 230 Miles An Hour Roll Down Yer Winder First, *Then* Spit So You Wanna Be A Crew Chief? Remember - Righty-Tighty, Lefty-Loosy Better Places to Put the Grill Than Next to the Winnebago''s Propane Tank Brakes Are For Sissies Advanced Technical Terms - "Yeeeehaww!" "Whoooodoggie!" and "Golldurn!" How To Say "Dick Trickle" Without Snickering Quick Prayers for Those Upside-Down Moments How to Drive in a Circle 500 Times Without Getting Dizzy Them Cars Are Fast - And LOUD!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two girls board a crowded bus and one of them whispers to the other, "Watch me embarrass a man into giving me his seat." Pushing her way through the crowd, she turned all of her charms upon a gentleman who looked like he might embarrass easily. "My dear Mr. Wilson," she gushed, "fancy meeting you here on the bus. Am I glad to see you! Why, you''re almost a stranger. My, but I''m tired!" The sedate gent looked up at the girl. He had never seen her before but he rose and said pleasantly, "Sit down, Mary, my girl. It isn''t often I see you on washday. No wonder you''re tired. Being pregnant isn''t easy. By the way, don''t deliver the wash until Thursday. My wife is going to the District Attorney''s office to see if she can get your husband out of jail."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it turned itself in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys were walking along a road in Georgia when they were struck by a police car driven by a drunken cop. One guy was thrown through the windshield and his buddy was knocked down an embankment. The first guy was charged with breaking and entering; and the second with leaving the scene of an accident.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Revised Miranda Rights Version 3 You are under arrest and.... 1. No, I don''t care who you are. 2. No, I don''t care who you know. 3. Yes, you DO pay my salary. 4. Yes, you CAN have my job. 5. No, I don''t have anything better to do. 6. Yes, I DO arrest real criminals sometimes. 7. No, I am not picking on you because you are __________ (fill in any ethnic group/race). 8. No, I cannot give you a break. 9. No, I don''t know your friend, Officer __________. 10. Yes, you will be allowed to make a phone call. 11. Yes, I''m sure you will never do it again. 12. No, we can''t talk about it. 13. Yes, it DOES make me happy. 14. Yes, you WILL see me in court. Thank you, have a nice day. Your Arresting Officer __________', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five policemen were on a boat. The boat sank. How many policemen died? 10 - five during the accident, and five during the re-enactment.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to throw a man down the stairs? None. He fell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, but he is never around when you need him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman took her next-door neighbor with her when she went to the police station to report her husband was missing. "Could you give me a description of your husband ma''am?" the officer asked. "He''s 35 years old, 6 foot 2, weighs approximately 190 pounds, has a very athletic build, gorgeous blue eyes, dark hair, is very soft spoken and wonderful with the children," the woman replied. "Wait a minute!" the neighbor protested. "Your husband is 5 foot 4, bald, fat, has brown eyes, a very big mouth and is mean to your children." "Yes, but who wants HIM back?" the woman said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was in the process of taking a verbal exam to join the local police force. "If you''re driving a police car, alone on a country road at night, and are being chased by a group of criminals driving sixty miles an hour, what would you do?" he was asked. Without hesitation, the young man replied, "Seventy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father in a hurry, taking his 8-year-old son to school, made a turn at a red light, where it wasn''t allowed. "Uh-oh, I just made an illegal turn!" he said. "That''s OK, Dad," his son replied. "The police car right behind us did the same thing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A veteran officer with 18 years is running radar on a main street of a rural town. Along comes a young driver in a brand new sports car going 48 mph in a 30 mph zone. The officer stops the young man and explains the violation. The driver becomes belligerent telling the officer his badge did not mean a thing. The young driver tells the officer to go ahead and write the ticket because his father knows people that will make the ticket "go away". While the officer completes the ticket the young driver continues his barrage of insults. Without flinching the officer completes the ticket and hands the young driver his copies. The driver looks at his copies and becomes very agitated. The driver said, "What the #$@%& do you think you are doing? I thought you said I was doing 48 in a 30. You wrote 88 in a 30?" The officer said, "Forty-eight, eighty-eight, what''s the difference? Your dad is going to make it go away anyway."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Swiss mountain guides who always do the same trails can get tired answering the same questions over and over. One time an English tourist was giving his guide an especially hard time with silly questions. They were walking through a mountain valley that was strewn with rocks, and the traveler asked, "How did these rocks get here?" "Sir," said the guide, "they were brought down by a glacier." The tourist peered up the mountain and said, "But I don''t see any glacier." "Oh, really?" said the guide. "I guess it has gone back for more rocks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thor: The Scandinavian god of acheth and painth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She does not HATE TELEVISED SPORTS - she is ATHLETICALLY IGNORANT. She has not BEEN AROUND - she is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION. She does not WEAR TOO MUCH PERFUME - she commits FRAGRANCE ABUSE. She does not GO SHOPPING - she is MALL FLUENT. She is not an AIR HEAD - she is REALITY IMPAIRED. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - she gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED. She does not get FAT or CHUBBY - she achieves MAXIMUM DENSITY. She is not COLD or FRIGID - she is THERMALLY INACCESSIBLE. She does not WEAR TOO MUCH MAKEUP - she has reached COSMETIC SATURATION. She does not NAG YOU - she becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She is not a BLEACHED BLONDE - she is PEROXIDE DEPENDENT. She is not a BAD COOK - she is MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE. She does not wear TOO MUCH JEWELRY - she is METALLICALLY OVERBURDENED. She is not CONCEITED - she is INTIMATELY AWARE OF HER BEST QUALITIES. She does not want to be MARRIED - she wants to lock you in DOMESTIC INCARCERATION. She does not GAIN WEIGHT - she is a METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER. She does not TEASE or FLIRT - she engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION. She is not DUMB - she is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY. She is not TOO SKINNY - she is SKELETALLY PROMINENT. She does not HAVE A MUSTACHE - she is IN TOUCH WITH HER MASCULINE SIDE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the mating call of a blonde? A: "I''m drunk!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple was having a discussion about family finances. Finally the husband exploded, "If it weren''t for my money, the house wouldn''t be here!" The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren''t for your money I wouldn''t be here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are lots of ways to ruin a date. Here are a few things NOT to say on a date... I really don''t like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired. I refuse to get cable. That''s how they keep tabs on you. I used to come here all the time with my ex. Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn''t hear my voice on the answering machine every hour. I really feel that I''ve grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn''t have given someone like you a second look. It''s been tough, but I''ve come to accept that most people I date just won''t be as smart as I am.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After being away on business for a week before Christmas, Tom thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift. "How about some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a bottle costing $50. "That''s a bit much," said Tom, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30. "That''s still quite a bit," Tom groused. Growing disgusted, the clerk brought out a tiny $15 bottle. Tom grew agitated, "What I mean," he said, "is I''d like to see something really cheap." So the clerk handed him a mirror.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was Christmas, and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner, "What are you charged with?" "Doing my Christmas shopping early," replied the defendant. "Surely that''s no offense," said the judge. "How early were you doing this shopping?" "Before the store opened."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I''ll bet you don''t know what day this is." "Of course I do," he answered as if he was offended, and left for the office. At 10:00 a.m., the doorbell rang and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a box of a dozen long stemmed red roses. At 1:00 p.m., a foil-wrapped, two-pound box of her favorite chocolates was delivered. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn''t wait for her husband to come home. "First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed. "I''ve never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The American tourist in Dublin had been complaining a great deal about the food. "Here," he said to the waitress, holding out a piece of meat for inspection, "do you call that pig?" "Which end of the fork, sir?" the waitress asked.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy and his wife, a middle-aged couple, went for a stroll in the park. They were sitting down on a bench to rest when they heard voices coming from a secluded spot. Suddenly Mrs. Murphy realized that a young man was about to propose. Not wanting to eavesdrop at such an intimate moment, she nudged her husband and whispered, "Whistle and let that young couple know that someone can hear them." Murphy said, "Whistle? Why should I whistle? Nobody whistled to warn me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy said to his daughter, "I want you home by eleven o''clock." She said, "But Father, I''m no longer a child!" He said, "I know, that''s why I want you home by eleven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does NASCAR stand for? Non Athletic Sport Created Around Rednecks', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards." The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards. What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?" "No," the cook said. "Three flat tires mean three pancakes, a pair of headlights is two eggs sunny side up, and running boards are 2 slices of crisp bacon." "Oh, OK!" said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer. The trucker asked, "What are the beans for, Blondie?" She replied, "I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the woman who had sex with a donkey? Apparently she liked an ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My boyfriend was working in the souvenir shop at the Canterbury Cathedral in Kent, England. One afternoon he was talking with an attendant who worked in the cathedral when they were approached by two tourists. "Are you a monk?" one of the women asked. "No," the attendant explained, "I wear this robe as part of my job, but I''m not a member of any religious order." "Then where are the monks?" asked the woman. The man replied, "Oh, there haven''t been any monks here since 1415." Hearing this, the woman looked at her watch and announced to her friend, "Betty, we missed the monks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Touring Ireland''s countryside with a group of travel writers, we passed an immaculate cemetery with hundreds of beautiful headstones set in a field of emerald-green grass. Everyone reached for their cameras when the tour guide said the inventor of the crossword puzzle was buried there. He pointed out the location, "Three down and four across."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there were two farmers; one had a daughter and the other had a son. When their kids were teenagers they started dating, and the two farmers encouraged it. One day the girl''s father went over to the other farmer''s house and said that he didn''t want their children dating any more. The boy''s father asked, "Why not?" The other farmer said, "Come here and I''ll show you." In his yard was the girl''s name written in pee in the snow. The boy''s father said, "Oh, come on, that''s just boy stuff." The other farmer said, "You think I don''t know my own daughter''s handwriting?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One radio station prank took place on April Fool''s Day. They announced that the phone company would be cleaning the dirt out of the phone lines that afternoon. They do it, as it seems, by blowing air into the wires in the switching station. The problem is that the dirt comes out of the earpiece and mouthpiece of the telephone and could dirty the rugs or furniture in your house. Consequently, the phone company asks that the good citizens please get plastic bags and put them over the handsets of the telephones to protect their belongings. Stores reported a run on plastic bags, and the phone company made the radio station retract the original claim.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in the days of the Mattel Cabbage Patch Kid craze it was usually very hard to get one for the kiddies. A radio station (I don''t know where) announced that Mattel was going to get Cabbage Patch Kids out to the people of this particular city. The plan was that they had to go to the football field of the local university and wait. An airplane would fly overhead and the dolls would be dropped onto the field. People were supposed to hold their credit cards up so that a photographer with a telephoto lens in the airplane could get the credit card numbers and charge the price of the dolls to the recipients'' accounts. People actually showed up, waving American Express cards in the breeze.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s the day before Thanksgiving, and the butcher is just locking up when a man begins pounding on the front door. "Please let me in," says the man desperately. "I forgot to buy a turkey, and my wife will kill me if I don''t come home with one." "Okay," says the butcher, "let me see what I have left." He goes into the freezer and discovers that there''s only one scrawny turkey left. He brings it out to show the man. "That one is too skinny. What else have you got?" says the man. The butcher takes the bird back into the freezer and waits a few minutes and brings the same turkey back out to the man. "Oh, no," says the man, "That one doesn''t look any better. You''d better give me both of them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she''s not feeling well. "What''s the matter?" he asks. "I have a case of anal glaucoma," she says in a weak voice. "What in the hell is anal glaucoma?" he inquires. "Well, I just can''t see my ass coming to work today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A motorist was on trial for hitting a pedestrian. His lawyer argued, "Your Honor, my client has been driving for over twenty-five years." "Your Honor," the plaintiff''s lawyer retored, "if this case is going to be judged by experience, may I remind you that my client has been walking for over fifty years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American businessman goes to Japan on a business trip, but he hates Japanese food, so he asks the concierge at his hotel if there''s any place around where he can get American food. The concierge tells him he''s in luck, there''s a pizza place that just opened, and they deliver. The concierge gives the businessman the phone number, he goes back to his room and orders a pizza. Thirty minutes later, the delivery guy shows up at the door with the pizza. The businessman takes the pizza, and starts sneezing uncontrollably. He asks the delivery man, "What the heck did you put on this pizza?" The delivery man bows deeply and says, "We put on pizza what you order: pepper only."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While I was visiting my sister one evening, I took out a candy dispenser that was shaped like a miniature person. "How does that thing work?" she asked. As I turned the figurine''s arm to pop candy out, my sister laughed. "I see ... it''s a lot like my husband," she said. "You have to twist his arm to get anything out of him."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teacher was sitting at her desk grading papers when her first-grade class came back from lunch. Alice informed the teacher, "Paul has to go to the principal''s office." "I wonder why," the teacher mused. "Because he''s a following person," Alice replied. "A what?" the teacher asked. "It came over the loudspeaker: ''The following persons are to go to the office.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many dicks can a redneck girl take at a time? It depends on how many brothers she has.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so poor she eats cereal with a fork to save milk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Special Cheesecake One of my co-workers decided it was time to shed some excess weight. She took her new diet so seriously that she even changed her driving route to avoid her favorite bakery. One morning, however, she arrived at work carrying a gigantic cheesecake. We all scolded her, but her smile remained cherubic. "This is a very special cheesecake," she explained. "I accidentally drove by the bakery this morning and there in the window was a host of goodies. I felt this was no accident, so I prayed, ''Lord, if you want me to have one of those delicious cheesecakes, let me have a parking spot directly in front of the bakery'', and sure enough," she continued, "the ninth time around the block, there it was!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy put on his baseball uniform and went outside to play, chanting "I''m the best baseball hitter in the world!" He throws the ball in the air, swings and misses. Strike one! He adjusts his hat and says, "I''m the best baseball hitter in the world!" He throws the ball in the air, swings and misses. Strike two! He adjusts his hat a little more, takes a couple of practice swings and says, "I''m the best baseball hitter in the world!" Once more, he throws the ball in the air, swings and misses again. Strike three! He thinks for a few moments about what just took place, then says, "I''m the best pitcher in the world!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While visiting a relative in Chicago, a University of Alabama student went to a party where he met a very attractive co-ed. Attempting to strike up a conversation with her, he asked, "Where does you go to school?" The co-ed, not at all impressed with his grammar or southern drawl, thought she would at least be polite and answer. "Yale," she said. Taking a deep breath, the UA student shouted, "I says, where does you go to school?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do the Arkansas cheerleaders wear bibs? To keep the tobacco juice off their uniforms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bubba finally agreed to take his wife, Sue Ellen, to a play. They had hardly sat down when he jumped up and said "Sue Ellen, we gotta go!" With Sue Ellen in tow, Bubba stomped out to the foyer, demanded his money back, and they left the theater. When they got out onto the sidewalk, Sue Ellen said, "Now you tell me what''s wrong, Bubba Leroy, and you tell me right now, or I ain''t goin'' another step." Bubba said, "Sue Ellen, I ain''t no fool and I''m an only child. We done paid $20 of egg money for this here play and I heard somebody say that the second act was 10 years later! We ain''t got that kinda money to be wastin'' on play actin'' when we ain''t even sure where we gonna be in 10 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The children in the Sunday school class were asked by their teacher to draw pictures of their favorite Bible stories. When she looked at little Ricky''s picture, she was puzzled to see that he had drawn four people in an airplane, so she asked him which story it represented. Little Ricky replied, "That''s the Flight to Egypt." "Oh, I see," said the teacher. "That must be Mary, Joseph and the Baby Jesus, but who''s the fourth person?" "That''s Pontius ... the Pilot!" answered Ricky.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Sunday morning, a man attended the service at the local church. He was so moved by the preacher''s sermon that he stopped to shake his hand. "Reverend, that was the best damn sermon I have ever heard," the man said. "Thank you, sir," the Reverend replied, "but I must ask that you not use profanity in the Lord''s house." "Sorry, Reverend, I just can''t help myself," said the man, "that was just such a damn good sermon." "Sir, please," replied the Reverend. "Again I ask you not to use profanity in church." "Okay, Reverend," the man said. "I just want you to know that I thought it was so damn good that I put $5000 in the collection plate." "No shit!" exclaimed the Reverend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attending her first confession, the new nun tells the priest that she has a terrible secret. "Sister Dominique," the priest says, your secret is safe in the sanctity of the confessional." "Father," she says, "I never wear underwear under my habit." With a little chuckle, the priest says, "That is not too serious, Sister Dominique. For penance, say three Hail Marys, three Our Fathers and do five cartwheels on your way to the altar."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. He gave the organist a copy of the service and asked her if she could come up with some kind of inspirational music to play, after he made the announcement about the finances, to help put the congregation in a giving mood. "Don''t worry, I''ll come up with something," she said. During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and sisters, we find ourselves in great difficulty. The cost of the roof repairs is twice as much as we expected, and we need $4000 more. Any of you who are able to pledge $100 or more, please stand up." At that moment, the organist began playing, "The Star Spangled Banner."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During his sermon, the preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike. As he preached, he continued to move briskly about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. At one point, he moved to one side and got caught up in the cord, nearly tripping before he jerked it again. After several circles and jerks, a little girl in the second pew leaned toward her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if he gets loose, will he hurt us?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the first day of creation, God created the dog. On the second day, God created man to serve the dog. On the third day, God created all the animals of the earth, especially the horse, to serve as potential food for the dog. On the fourth day, God created honest toil so that man could labor for the good of the dog. On the fifth day, God created the tennis ball so that the dog might or might not retrieve it. On the sixth day, God created veterinary science to keep the dog healthy and the man broke. On the seventh day, God tried to rest, but He had to walk the dog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It seems that God received a delegation of animals complaining of their lot in life. There was an elephant, a giraffe, and a hen. The elephant complained, "Lord, I HATE THIS TRUNK YOU have given me. It gets in the way, and makes me look like a total fool!" The Lord said, "Don''t complain. It lets you pick up food, drink, and water without getting wet!" Next the giraffe complained, "Lord, I HATE THIS LONG NECK! It makes me top heavy, I get terrible neck pains, and people point and laugh at me!" The Lord said, "Don''t complain. It lets you pick the best fruit and leaves from the high branches, and allows you to see a fair distance." Then the hen spoke up. "Lord, I don''t want to complain, but either let me have a bigger ass or smaller eggs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three nuns die and go to heaven where they are met by St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Pete says, "Ladies, you all led such wonderful lives, that I''m granting you six months to go back to Earth and be anyone you want." The first nun says, "I want to be Bo Derek," and - POOF - she''s gone. The second says, "I want to be Madonna," and - POOF - she''s gone. The third says, "I want to be Virginia Pepalini." St Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he says. "Virginia Pepalini," replies the nun. St. Peter shakes his head and says, "I''m sorry, that name just doesn''t ring a bell." The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter. He reads the paper and starts laughing. He hands it back to her and says, "No, Sister, this says the Virginia Pipeline was laid by 500 men in 7 days!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On our last venture out for Christmas shopping, we had bought a few gadgets for the younguns and then realized we didn''t have any batteries. I stepped over to the counter to get the batteries, but I couldn''t attract any clerk''s attention. I waited a while then said to April, "I''ll get someone''s attention. Stay right here." With that, I pulled out a tape measure I just happened to have with me, and started to "measure" one of those large screen plasma television sets. You know, the ones that go for about $4000. Amazingly, a clerk almost leap-frogged over several pieces of furniture to reach my side. "Sir! Can I help you?" he exclaimed. "Yeah, you can. I''ll take 8 of those batteries over there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A congregation honors a rabbi for twenty-five years of service by sending him to Oahu for a week, all expenses paid. When he enters his hotel room, there''s a nude girl lying on the bed. He picks up the phone, calls his temple, and says, "Where is your respect? As your rabbi, I am extremely angry with you." Hearing this, the girl immediately gets up and starts to get dressed. He says, "Where are you going? I''m not angry with you..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An engaged couple met with their pastor to set the date for their wedding. During the meeting, the pastor asked them whether they preferred to have a contemporary or a traditional service. They chose a contemporary service. On the day of the big event there was a major storm, which caused the groom to take a different route to the church. Since the streets were flooded, he rolled up his trouser legs to keep his trousers dry. When he finally reached the church, his best man rushed him into the sanctuary and up to the altar, just as the ceremony was starting. "Pull down your pants," whispered the pastor. "Uh, Reverend, I''ve changed my mind," the groom replied. "I think I would prefer the traditional service."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny had the flu and wasn''t able to attend the Palm Sunday church service with his family. When they returned home from the service, they were carrying palm branches. "What are those?" Little Johnny asked his mother. "People held them over Jesus'' head as he walked by," his mother explained. "Well, doesn''t that just figure," grumbled Little Johnny. "The one Sunday I can''t go to church, and Jesus shows up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The preschoolers'' Sunday school teacher told them that she wanted each of them to learn one fact about Jesus by the following Sunday. The next Sunday, she asked each of them what they had learned. "I learned that he was born in a manger," said Julie. Timmy said, "I learned that he threw the money changers out of the temple." "What about you, Johnny? What did you learn?" the teacher asked. "He has a pick-up truck and he doesn''t know how to drive," replied Little Johnny. Curious, the teacher asked, "And where did you learn that, Johnny?" "I learned it from Daddy," Little Johnny explained. "When we were driving down the highway, a pick-up truck cut right in front of us and Daddy shouted, "Jesus Christ! Why don''t you learn how to drive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, a mother was walking past her young daughter''s room when she saw the little girl kneeling by her bed, head bowed, hands folded, reciting the alphabet. "What are you doing, sweetheart?" the mother asked. "I''m saying my prayers, Mommy," replied the little girl, "but I couldn''t think of what I wanted to say, so I''m saying the letters of the alphabet, and God can put them together whichever way He feels is best."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why don''t politicians ever consider being gynocologists? They would have to deal with too much Bush every day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do elfs learn while in school? A. The elfabet!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, God was talking to St. Peter. God said, "I am not very happy with all the sinners in the world. I should send a letter to each of them and tell them what they are doing wrong and they must stop, or they will not come to Heaven when they die." "I have a better idea," St. Peter said. "We should send letters to all the people who are doing good things and congratulate them on being accepted into Heaven when they pass on." God agreed, so they sent out the letters. Do you know what the letters said? What, you mean you didn''t get one?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock.. Who''s there? Panther.... Panther who? Panth-er no panth I''m goin'' thwimmin''!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marg and Sam invited a couple over for a evening of bridge. "Sam," Marg said, "this is the last couple that will ever accept an invitation to come to our house. If you dare to do anything to offend them tonight, I will crucify you!" After they played for a while, Marg went into the kitchen to get some refreshments. When she returned, she saw that Sam was sitting at the table by himself. She put the tray down and said, "What did you do to run them off this time?" "I didn''t do anything," Sam replied. "We were just sitting here and a mouse ran across the floor. Sue looked at me and said that we can get rid of mice by shoving steel wool into their little holes. All I asked was, ''How do you hold their little feet?'' They both got up and left."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old guy was wandering around a supermarket calling out - "Crisco? Crisco? C-R-I-S-C-O!" Finally, a clerk approached him and said, "Sir, the Crisco in on aisle seven." "Oh," the old guy said, "I''m not looking for Crisco. I''m calling my wife." "Your wife''s name is Crisco?" the puzzled clerk asked. "Hell, no," the old guy said. "I only call her that when we come to the supermarket." "Oh? Well, what do you call her when you''re not in the supermarket?" asked the clerk. "Lard Ass!" replied the old guy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ted and Alice were thrilled when their long wait to adopt a baby finally came to an end. The adoption center called and told them they had an adorable German baby boy and the couple took him without hesitation. On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped at the local college so they could enroll in night classes. After they completed filling out the form, the registrar inquired, "What possessed you to study German?" "We''ve just adopted a wonderful German baby boy and in a year or so, he''ll begin to talk. We want to make sure we''re able to understand him!" the couple proudly explained.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple were on a road trip and stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. They finished their lunch and it wasn''t until they were back on the highway that the old woman realized she had left her glasses behind at the restaurant. They had to continue on the highway for quite some distance before they were able to find a spot to turn around. The old man grumbled and complained all the way back to the restaurant. When they finally arrived, as the old woman got out of the car to retrieve her glasses, the old man said, "While you''re in there, you may as well get my hat, too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m feeling so ashamed of the way we live, a wife said to her husband, who preferred to spend his time laying on the couch watching TV, rather than finding a job. "My father pays our mortgage, my mother buys all of our groceries for us, my sister buys us our clothes, my uncle bought us a car. I''m feeling so ashamed." The husband raised his head and replied, "Well, you should feel ashamed. Those three worthless brothers of yours never even give us a cent!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man stumbles into his house after a night of drinking and is greeted by his very angry wife. "What''s the big idea of coming home half drunk?" she yells. "I''m sorry, honey, but I ran out of money," he mutters.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seven-year-old Timmy had been the center of his parents'' lives up until the time his new baby sister came along. He found it very difficult to share their attention and was becoming more and more jealous. When his little sister was a year old, his parents took him aside and told him that since she was getting bigger, their house was too small, so they would be moving to a bigger house. "Why bother," Timmy grumbled, "She''s crawling good now, so she''ll probably just follow us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly man and his wife, vacationing at a cabin by the lake, were sitting on the porch and reminiscing about their younger years. "This is the lake where I learned how to swim when I was a small boy," the husband said. "My father threw me into the water and I had to learn how to dog paddle to get back to the shore or drown. It was sink or swim." "That was a cruel thing for your father to do," the wife said. "How could a loving father do such a thing to a small child? That must have been a very difficult way to learn how to swim." "Not really," replied the husband. "Learning how to swim was the easy part. Getting out of that burlap bag first was the hard part!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This really happened (honest!) A bunch of very young girls arrived at our door at Halloween. My Mum, being friendly, asked them whereabouts they lived, because she hadn''t seen them before. They replied, "We live quite near here, where do you live?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a child who came back from school one day with loads of cuts and bruises and his bike broken. The concerned mother asked him what had happened. So, the child says "Well, when the fridge landed on me..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This really happened (honest!) A man was receiving death threats from another man, so he took him to court. The judge threw the case out on the basis that "the threats obviously hadn''t been carried out." Really, how stupid can you get?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your email address ends in "@over.yonder.com". You have a bumper sticker on your truck that says "My other computer is a laptop". You''ve ever doubled the value of your truck by installing a cellular phone. Your spell checker knows words like, "Y''all", "Yonder" and "Reckon". You''ve ever used a CD-ROM as a coaster to set your beer on. Your laptop has a sticker on it that says "Protected by Smith & Wesson". You''ve used jumper cables to wire your network. Your wife said "either she or the computer had to go" and you still don''t miss her. You start all your emails with "Hey Bubba", or "Howdy Y''all".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The politician was sitting at his campaign headquarters when the phone rang. He answered it and listened intently. After a brief moment, his face lit up with a smile. He hung up the phone and immediately called his mother to pass along the good news. "Ma, the results are in," he shouted joyously. "I won the election!" "Honestly?" his mother replied. "Aw, gee, Ma, what a time to bring that up!" he said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While running for the Senate in New York, the young man''s political advisor heard some very upsetting news. "Listen," he said, "you must go to Albany right away or you''re going to lose a lot of votes. They''re telling lies about you there." "I have to go to Buffalo first or I''ll lose even more votes," replied the candidate. "Why? What''s happening in Buffalo?" the advisor asked. "They''re telling the truth about me!" replied the candidate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A group of American tourists were on a guided tour through an ancient castle in Europe. "Ladies and gentlemen," the guide said, "this castle is over 700 years old. Nothing has been altered or touched in all those years." "Sounds like they have the same cheap landlord I have!" exclaimed one of the tourists.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly lady was stopped to pull into a parking space when a young man in his new Mercedes went around her and parked in the space she was waiting for. She was so upset that she went up to the man and said, "I was going to park there!" The man, being a real smart alec, said, "Oh, well, that''s what you can do when you''re young and bright." This made the lady even angrier, so she got in her car, backed up, pressed on the gas and plowed right into his Mercedes. The young man raced back to his car and exclaimed, "What did you go and do that for?" The little old lady replied, "That''s what you can do when you''re old and rich!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A film crew was on location deep in the desert. One day, an old Indian went up to the director and said, "Tomorrow storm." The next day there was a sandstorm. Several days later, the Indian went up to the director and said, "Tomorrow rain." The next day it rained for the entire day. "This Indian is amazing," said the director. He told his secretary to hire the Indian to predict the weather. However, after several successful predictions, the old Indian failed to show up for a couple of weeks. Finally, the director sent for him. "I have a big scene to shoot tomorrow," the director said, "and I''m counting on you. What will the weather be like?" "Not know," replied the Indian, shrugging his shoulders. "Radio broken!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Susie was mother''s little helper and always set the table when company was coming for dinner. The table was set, the visitors had arrived and everyone sat down at the table when Mother noticed that something was missing. "Susie, you didn''t put a knife and fork out for Mr. Grover," mother said. "I didn''t think he would need them, Mommy," Susie explained. "Daddy says he eats like a horse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and baby camel are talking one day when the baby camel asks, "Momma, why do I have these huge three-toed feet?" The mother replies, "Well, son, when we trek across the desert, your toes will help you to stay on top of the soft sand." A few minutes later, the young camel asks, "Momma, why do I have these long eyelashes?" "They''re to keep the sand out of your eyes on the trips through the desert," replies the mother. "Momma, why do I have these great big humps on my back?" asks the baby camel. "They''re to help us store fat for our long treks across the desert, so we can go without eating for long periods," explains the mother. "So, we have huge feet to stop us from sinking, long eyelashes to keep the sand out of our eyes and these humps to store fat," the young camel says. "That''s right, son," says the mother. "Then why are we in San Diego Zoo?" asks the baby camel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man accused of theft was appearing before the Judge. "Your Honor," his lawyer said, "I feel it is very unfair for my client to be accused of theft. He arrived in this city only a few days ago and barely knows his way around. What''s more, he is only able to speak a few words of English." The judge looked sternly at the defendant and asked, "How much English do you speak?" The defendant looked up and replied, "Give me your wallet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A murderer was secured to the electric chair, about to be executed. The chaplain approached him and asked, "Do you have any last requests?" "Yes," replied the murderer. "Would you hold my hand?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blond walking down the street, and she saw an empty coke can on the floor. So she picked it up and handed it to lost property.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she ate 100 cakes yesterday and got thinner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was walking down the road when she saw a beautiful looking lamp, so she picked it up. She rubbed it and a magic genie came out. "You may have any three objects in the world, oh mighty mistress," said the genie. The blonde replied, "I wish I had an endless glass of wine." Suddenly a big, crystal glass filled with wine appeared in the blonde''s hand. She drank it and to her surprise, it filled up again! "Wow! This wine is really nice, and it can''t run out!" the blonde said. "In fact, it''s so good, I''ll have another two of these, please, genie!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sailing down the river amazon in a canoe, when he was hit by a poison dart. He woke up some time later in a cage, surrounded by a tribe chief and his minions. The chief said "You have been tresspassing on our tribes private property. You will be doomed to death by ravens pecking out your insides. However, if you pass our 2 tests, you will be allowed to go. The first of which is a test of courage, of bravery, of strength. You must go into the first tent, and there you will find a lion, a lion with a thorn in its paw. The second challenge is one of compassion, thought and love. You must shag the 10 most beautiful ladies of our tribe. Now, let the challenges begin..." The man goes into the tent and at first, there is much roaring and howling, but eventually it calms down. Then the man comes out and says "That''s the first challenge done! Now where are those 10 beautiful ladies who I must pull thorns out of their paws?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day two old men, Bill and Ted, were sitting on a park bench discussing their sex life. Bill states, "At my age, me and the old lady have sex about once a year." Ted replies, "Oh really! Me and the old lady have sex almost every day." "No way!" says Bill. "You''re joking, right?" "No, really!" insists Ted. "Almost on Sunday, almost on Monday, almost on Tuesday..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chapstick is selling a new product in England. It is the regular Chapstick with Viagra added to the formula. Englishmen like it because it helps them keep a stiff upper lip.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pirate Blackbeard''s ship license had expired so he went into the shipping license office and got a new one, but on the new one he needed an updated photo of himself. So, Pirate Blackbeard went into the photographer''s room and asked to have his photo taken. The photographer obliged and said, "Ok, please pose front on" and took a photo. He need to take another photo so he asked Blackbeard to "Please Poseidon!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a quiet smoke. Jack returned with lung cancer and Jill a fatal stroke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bunch of lawyers were sitting around the office playing poker. "I win!" said Johnson. Henderson threw down his cards. "That''s it! I''ve had it! Johnson is cheating!!!" "How can you tell?" Phillips asked. "Those aren''t the cards I dealt him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A cowboy entered a barber shop, sat on the barber''s chair and said, "I''ll have a shave and a shoe shine, please." The barber began to lather his face while a woman with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts he had ever seen knelt down and began to shine his shoes. "Young lady," the cowboy said, "you and I should go and spend some time in a hotel room." "I''m married and my husband wouldn''t like that at all," she replied. "No problem," the cowboy said, "just tell him you''re working overtime and I''ll pay you the difference." "You tell him," she said. "He''s the one shaving you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If four people are standing under an umbrella and the umbrella has a hole in it, how many people are getting wet? None. It wasn''t raining!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you have a fat friend, there are no seesaws, just catapults.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a very hot day in Minnesota. Inga finished hanging up the wash, put dinner in the oven and headed downtown to do some errands. "Gootness, it''s hot," she mused to herself, as she walked down Main Street. As she passed by a tavern, she thought, "Vy nodt?" So she walked in and took a seat at the bar. The bartender came up and asked her what she would like to drink. "Ya know," Inga said, "it is so hodt. I tink I''ll have myself ze coldt beer." "Anheuser Busch?" asked the bartender. Blushing, Inga replied, "Vell, tanks, und how''s yer pecker?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A proud father brought home a swing set he had just purchased for his children and immediately began to assemble it while all the neighborhood children anxiously waited to play on it. After several hours of reading the assembly instructions and trying to fit bolt A into slot B, etc., he gave up and called upon an old handyman working in a neighboring yard. The old-timer came over, tossed the directions away, and had the set completely assembled in a short period of time. "It''s beyond me," the father said, "how you managed to get it all put together without even reading the directions." "To tell the truth," replied the old-timer, "I can''t read, and when you can''t read, you''ve got to think."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a dinner party, the hosts'' two small children entered the dining room naked and proceeded to parade slowly around the table. Embarrassed, the parents pretended nothing was happening and continued to converse with their guests. The guests co-operated and also carried on as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening. After they finished walking all around the room, the children left. As the children disappeared from sight, there was a moment of silence at the table, during which one child was heard to say, "See, I told you, it IS vanishing cream!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One Christmas, a parent decided that she was no longer going to remind her children of their thank-you note duties. As a result, their grandmother did not receive acknowledgments of the generous checks she had given. However, things were different the following year. "The children came over in person to thank me," the grandparent told a friend triumphantly. "How wonderful!" the friend exclaimed. "What do you think caused the change in their behavior?" "Oh, that''s easy," the grandmother replied. "This year I didn''t sign the checks."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now, as we don''t have enough parachutes for all of us... "Of course that''s not a mountain in front...isn''t it?" "That''s not meant to happen!" "What dy''a mean were not meant to be going to Iraq?" Things you don''t want to see on an aeroplane: Fire engines and ambulances surounding the runway when you come in to land. Armed soldiers and tanks surrounding the runway when you come in to land. The wing fall off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you don''t want to hear on an aeroplane: "You can''t leave us now Captain, not at this stage!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Nick''s Grandma gave him a map to her house. The address was 1767 Old Miffs Road. Nick traveled till he got to Old Miffs road. He didn''t pay attention to the sign and thought he was lost. He stopped at a woman''s house and she opened the door. "Why hello there!" the woman said. "Nice to see you, Nick." Nick couldn''t hear her, so he asked "Do you know where 1767 Old Miffs Road is?" "You''re here," she said, but Nick still couldn''t hear her. He went to a different house down the road. He asked "Do you know where 1767 Old Miffs Road is?" "Yes, it''s right there." "This isn''t Old Miffs Road!" "Pay attention to street signs."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a blonde who was writing a book. She didn''t know what else to write, so she took a block from her little sisters toy box and went to go and watch TV. Her mom comes in and sees the book on the table with the wooden block on it. She goes ask her daughter what it was and her blonde daughter responded, "It''s writers block mommy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sitting in a plane when another man sat down in the seat beside him. The new fellow was a wreck, pale, hands shaking, biting his nails and moaning in fear. "Hey, pal, what''s the matter?" the first fellow asked. "I''ve been transferred to Los Angeles, California," he answered nervously. "They have riots, drugs, the highest crime rate in the country ... " "Wait a minute," the first fellow said. "I''ve lived in L.A. all my life and I can assure you it''s nowhere near as bad as the media reports. Find yourself a nice home, go to work, mind your own business, enroll your kids in a good school and it''s as safe as anywhere in the world." The second fellow stopped shaking for a moment and replied, "Thank God. I was worried to death! If you live there and say it''s all right, I''ll take your word for it. By the way, what do you do for a living?" "Me?" replied the first fellow. "I''m tail gunner on a bread truck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The once was a lung doctor waiting outside a patient''s room of who she didn''t know. A different doctor came up to her with a shot canister and said ''I need you to go in the and draw blood from this guy'' ''Ok, simple!'' she responded. She walks in the room and there strapped down to the table was a big muscley guy who was in there for taking drugs.'' He sits there struggling to get out. The wrist bands look as if they''re about to break. The lung doctor storms out of there and spots the doctor. She says ''Ok if you want to get a needle stuck and play hostage today that''s fine. But there''s no way in hell I''m going in there and sticking that hulk with a needle'' She hands him the shot canister and walks away. Under his breath he says ''Crap now who should i ask..?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Carole was planning her upcoming wedding and asked to wear her mother''s wedding gown. When she tried it on, it was a perfect fit on her petite frame. Suddenly, her mother''s eyes filled with tears. Putting an arm around her, Carole lovingly said, "Don''t cry, Mom. Remember, you aren''t losing a daughter, you''re gaining a son." "Oh, it''s not that," her mother sobbed. "I used to fit into that gown!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the difference between a dog and a fox? A: About five drinks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it dangerous to go in the jungle after 5 p.m? Because elephants jump out of trees after 5 p.m. Why do beavers have flat tails? Because they go in the jungle after 5 p.m!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone on a passenger ship could see a bearded man on a small island, shouting and desperately waving his hands. "Who is that man?" a passenger asked the ship''s captain. "Why is he so upset?" "I have no idea," the Captain replied, "but, every year when we pass by here, he goes crazy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Indian is standing on the corner, when an attractive young woman passes by. The Indian raises his hand in greeting, and says, "Chance!" The same thing happens several days in a row. The woman walks past and the old Indian raises his hand and says, "Chance!" Finally, she can''t ignore it any longer, so she stops and asks, "You''re an Indian, aren''t you?" The Indian nods. She says, "I always thought Indians said ''How!'' as a greeting." The Indian replies, "Already know ''how''. Just want ''chance''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money. "How much do they run?" he asked the clerk. "That depends," said the salesman. "They run from $2.00 to $2,000." "Let''s see the $2.00 model," he said. The clerk put the device around the man''s neck. "You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket," he instructed. "How does it work?" the customer asked. "For $2.00 it doesn''t work," the salesman replied. "But when people see it on you, they''ll talk louder!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is the reason they make oriental flavored noodles for Americans to get back at them for eating our dogs?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Supermarket A new supermarket opened near my house. It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain. When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and experience the scent of fresh hay. When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn. Though I do have to say... I don''t buy my toilet paper there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Blonde walked into a bar. The Brunette used the door. The redhead actually OPENED the door, and the Asian actually WENT THROUGH the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: SSCCRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHH...thump. We shall never know...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so dirty that she was banned from a sewage facility because of sanitation worries!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where does a blackbird go for a drink? A: To a crow bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The gas station was located on a main highway leading to the beach so the pump attendant was accustomed to seeing tired and sunburned occupants in the cars that pulled in to fill up. When a rusty old station wagon containing a very tired looking couple and seven screaming children pulled into his station, the attendant tried small talk to cheer the occupants. "Hope you had a good day at the beach! Nice looking kids there. Are they all yours or is this a picnic?" Wearily, the driver relied, "Yes, they are all mine, and it is NO picnic!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A detachment of paratroopers was practicing in a rural area. One jumper landed on the property of an old mountain man and his very large family. One of the kids saw the chute floating down and yelled out to his father, "Pa, bring your shotgun. The stork is bringing ''em full grown now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The little old lady seated herself right behind the bus driver. Every ten minutes or so she''d pipe up, "Have we reached Oriskany Falls yet, sonny?" "No, lady, not yet; I''ll let you know," he replied, time after time. The hours passed, the old woman kept asking for Oriskany Falls, and finally the little town came into view. Sighing with relief, the driver slammed on the brakes, pulled over and called out, "This is where you get out, lady." "Is this Oriskany Falls?" "YES!" he bellowed. "Get out!" "Oh, I''m going all the way to Albany, sonny," she explained sweetly. "It''s just that my daughter told me that when we got to Oriskany Falls, it''ll be time take my blood pressure pill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The driver of a huge trailer lost control of his rig, plowed into an empty tollbooth and smashed it to pieces. He climbed down from the wreckage and within a matter of minutes, a truck pulled up and discharged a crew of workers. The men picked up each broken piece of the former tollbooth and spread some kind of creamy substance on it. Then they began fitting the pieces together. In less than a half hour, they had the entire tollbooth reconstructed and looking good as new. "Astonishing!" the truck driver said to the crew chief. "What was the white stuff you used to get all the pieces together?" The crew chief said, "Oh, that was tollgate booth paste."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With what kind of bread do elves make their sandwiches? Shortbread!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two young cowboys - aged six and four - walked into the pretend bar for a drink. The older cowboy thumped his fist on the pretend bar and said to the pretend bartender, "Bartender, gimme a rye whiskey!" The younger cowboy was not to be outdone. "Yeah, and make mine a whole wheat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A farmer and his friend were leaning on a fence chatting. Suddenly, the local Game Warden showed up and insisted on checking the farmer''s property and, in particular, a certain field. The farmer refused to allow him access to the field but the Warden insisted he had the right, saying, "I''m the Game Warden and I have a card! This card allows me to go in." Before the farmer could stop him, the Warden was off into the field. Soon, a horrifying scream pierced the air and the Warden, being chased by a massive bull, reappeared running for his life. "Help, help!" he cried. The farmer shouted back, "Show him your card! Show him your card!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge was instructing the jury that because a witness changed his statement after giving it to the police, he should not necessarily be regarded as untruthful. "For example," the judge said, "when I entered my chambers today, I was certain that I had my gold watch in my pocket, then I remembered that I had left it on my nightstand in my bedroom." When the judge arrived home that evening, his wife asked, "Why so much urgency for your watch? Don''t you think sending three men to pick it up for you was a bit extreme?" "What?" exclaimed the judge. "I didn''t send anyone for my watch, let alone three people. What did you do?" "I gave it to the first one," replied his wife, "after all, he knew exactly where it was."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was suing a man for defamation of character, charging that he had called her a pig. The man was found guilty and fined. After the trial, he asked the Judge, "Does this mean that I can''t call Miss Stuart a pig?" The Judge said that was accurate. "Does this also mean that I can''t call a pig ''Miss Stuart''?" the man asked. The Judge told the man that he could indeed call a pig ''Miss Stuart'' with no fear of legal action. The man then turned to Miss Stuart and said, "Good afternoon, Miss Stuart!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer was reading a wealthy man''s will to the people mentioned in it. "To my wife Claire, who stood by me through the rough times as well as the good, I leave you the house, the cars and $5 million." The lawyer continued, "To my daughter Sarah, who took care of me during my illness and kept my company going, I leave you the yacht, the business and $2 million." The lawyer concluded, "And, to my cousin Phil, who always hated me, argued with me, was envious of me, and thought I would never mention him in my will ... well, you''re wrong. ''Hi, Phil!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And God created woman and she had three breasts. God then asked the woman, "Is there anything you would like to have changed?" "Yes," the woman replied. "Could you get rid of this middle breast?" And so it was done. Holding the third breast in her hand, the woman exclaimed, "What can be done with this useless boob?" And God created man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('365.25 days on a low-calorie diet - 1 lite year', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is an actual chatroom conversation from a "local Chatroom" Joe: I wonder what would happen if you had a sleep number bed, and set it to 69? Christy: ? huh? Mike: I dont know, but it sure sounds tasty! Joe: You probably wouldn''t understand Christy, you''re too pure and innocent. Christy: Maybe... sounds more like a police code or something Mike: lol, ya, that''s it. "This is the dispatcher, what is your status" Joe: lol "We have a 69 in progress at the overpass, Officer needs assistance" Mike: "Move in! Move in! Officer has gone down, repeat, Officer has gone down! Joe: "Someone better call the fire department, looks like we''ll need the Jaws of Life for this one!" Christy: um.. why do i get the feeling i''ve started something horrible? o.O', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Clones are people two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This will make your computer A LOT faster, and it is REALLY EZPZ! The thing is, most ppl lack the knowlege to use it. 1.Go to the START menu 2. Click My Computer 3. Right click (C:) 4.Click Format 5. Click Yes 6. Repeat on (D:), then (E:), then (A:) 7. TA DA! FTR, if you do this, you will completely erase everything on your computer', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A radical feminist gets on a bus when, just in front of her, a man gets up from his seat. "Here we go again," she thinks to herself. "Yet another man attempting to keep up the customs of a patriarchal society by offering a poor, defenseless woman his seat," and she pushes him back onto the seat. A minute passes and the man tries to get up again. She''s insulted again and refuses to allow him to get up. This happens several times over the next few minutes. Finally, the man pleads, "Lady, please, you have to let me get up. I''m already a couple of miles past my stop!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy''s teacher sent a note home to Mom saying, "Billy is a very bright boy, but spends much too much time thinking about girls and sex." The next day Mom sent a note back to the teacher saying, "If you happen to find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his Dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the second grader arrived home from school, she excitedly ran up to her mom and said, "Guess what we learned today, mommy? How to make babies." Her mother was more than surprised, but did her best to remain calm. She knew that this day would come, but she had hoped it wouldn''t have been so soon. "How interesting dear," her mother said. "How do you make babies?" "It''s really simple," replied the little girl. "All you have to do is change the ''y'' to ''i'' and add ''es''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asked little Andy if he knew his numbers yet. "Yes, teacher," he said, "my dad taught me." "Good, Andy. Tell me what comes after two," the teacher said. "Three," replied Andy. "Very good. What comes after five, Andy?" asked the teacher. "Six," answered Andy. "Excellent. Your dad did a very good job. Now, what comes after ten?" the teacher asked. "A jack!" replied Andy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Having just graduated from Harvard, the young man was very excited thinking about his future. Getting into a taxi, the driver says to him, "How are you on this beautiful, sunny day?" "I''m the class of 2006. I just graduated from Harvard and I''m very excited about getting out there and seeing what the world has in store for me!" The driver shakes the young man''s hand and replies, "Congratulations, young man. I''m George, class of 1968."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, during math class, the teacher asked Little Johnny, "If I give you two rabbits, two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many would you have?" "Seven," replied Johnny. "No, Johnny. Listen carefully this time. If I give you two rabbits, two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many would you have?" asked the teacher. "Seven!" insisted Johnny. "Let''s try this another way. If I give you two apples, two apples and another two apples, how many would you have?" the teacher asked. "Six," Johnny answered. "Good, Johnny, that''s right," said the teacher. "Now, if I give you two rabbits, two rabbits and another two rabbits, how many would you have?" "Seven!" Johnny said. "Johnny, how on earth do you work out that three lots of two rabbits would be seven?" asked the baffled teacher. "Easy. I already have one rabbit at home now!" Johnny replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The social studies teacher had just completed a lesson on war and peace. "How many of you," the teacher asked, "would say you''re opposed to war?" Not surprisingly, every student in the class raised their hand. "Who would like to give us their reason for being opposed to war?" asked the teacher. Little Johnny, sitting at the back of the class, immediately raised his hand. "Johnny, what is your reason?" the teacher asked. "I hate wars," explained Johnny, "because wars make history, and I hate History!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A well-endowed university student was always being teased by her sorority sisters for being a size 36DD. One night, at a fraternity party, a young man asked her what she would like to drink. "I''ll have a diet soda, please," she replied. "Oh, you must be the double D," he said. Furious, the girl wondered which one of her so-called friends had divulged such personal information. "And just what do you mean by that?" she snapped. Confused by her angry response, the man stammered, "You know, the designated driver."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher told her students they would start their day with the Pledge of Allegiance, instructing them to place their right hand over their heart and repeat after her. As she began to recite the Pledge, she looked around the room and noticed that Little Johnny hand his hand over the right cheek of his behind. "Little Johnny," she said, "we will not continue until you place your hand over your heart." "It is over my heart," Little Johnny replied innocently. She attempted to get Little Johnny to place his hand over his heart several times, all to no avail. Finally, frustrated, she asked, "What makes you think that''s your heart?" "Well, whenever Grandma comes to visit," Johnny explained, "she picks me up, gives me a couple of pats right here, and says, ''Bless your little heart,'' and I know Grandma wouldn''t lie."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Little Johnny got his exam paper back, he saw a big red F staring back at him. Billy looked at his glum friend and asked, "Why did you get such a low mark on that test?" "Because of absence," Johnny answered. "You mean you were absent on the day of the test?" Billy inquired. Little Johnny replied, "I wasn''t, but the kid who sits next to me was."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher noticed that Johnny had been daydreaming for a long time, so she decided to get his attention. "Johnny," she said, "if the world is 25,000 miles around and eggs are sixty cents a dozen, how old am I?" Johnny answered, "Thirty-four." The teacher replied, "Well, that''s not far from my age. Tell me ... how did you guess?" "Oh, there''s nothing to it," Johnny said. "My big sister is seventeen and she''s only half-crazy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING- this is very racial. Please forgive me if it offends you, but its true when you think about it. Since we have so many Mexicans saying,"o we want to serve you americans, work in america...",why dont we just put them in the army. We give them our supplies. They go, jump the border like no manyana and set up base. With all the tanks the Iraqis have, they go and before you notice it they have the wheeles, the tank is up on cinder blocks and they are out of there, just like they do in the city. We have tanks, with guns that turn 360 degrees. 360. So if you think about it, its like a drive by. So lets let all the blacks go in and control the tanks. So we get into Iraq, and we have a drive by. With the increasing of this we can win!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so stupid she copied someone in an exam and got less than them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde asks a woman, "Excuse me, what time is it right now?" The woman replies, "It''s 11:25PM." The Blonde with a confused look on her face replies, "You know, it''s the weirdest thing. I''ve asked that question thirty times today and every time someone gives me a different answer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman wasn''t feeling well, so she asked a co-worker if she could recommend a doctor. "I know a very good doctor, but he is quite expensive. He charges $350 for the first visit, and $150 for each subsequent visit, but he really is quite good," replied the co-worker. The woman went to the doctor''s office and, trying to pull a fast one and save herself some money, she cheerfully announced, "I''m back!" Not fooled for a moment, the doctor gave her a quick exam and said, "Very good; now just continue the treatment I prescribed for you on your last visit."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old hillbilly farmer with a severe case of hemorrhoids visited the doctor. The doctor prescribed some very powerful suppositories and asked the man to come back in a couple of weeks. The old farmer hadn''t used suppositories before, and didn''t realize they weren''t a pill to be taken orally. Two weeks later, the old farmer, in even more discomfort from the hemorrhoids, sees the doctor again. The doctor asks him how the suppositories are working? The old farmer says, "For all the good they did me, I might as well have shoved them up my ass!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A veterinarian was feeling ill, so he went to see his doctor. The doctor asked all the usual questions ... what symptoms did he have, how long had they been occurring, etc., when the vet interrupted him: "Look, doc, I''m a vet and I can''t ask my patients these questions. I can tell what''s wrong just by looking - why can''t you?" he said smugly. The doctor nodded, stood back and looked the vet up and down. He then quickly wrote out a prescription, handed it to the vet, and said, "There you go. Of course, you do understand that if that doesn''t work, we''ll have to have you put to sleep!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A policeman was rushed to the hospital with appendicitis. The doctors operated and informed him that all went well. However, he kept feeling something pulling at the hairs on his chest. Concerned that there was a second surgery the doctors hadn''t told him about, he finally mustered up the energy to pull his hospital gown down far enough so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable. Taped firmly across his hairy chest were three wide strips of adhesive tape, the type that doesn''t come off easily. Written in large black letters was the sentence:- "Have a speedy recovery ... from the nurse you gave a ticket to last week."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Well, Jonathan, what are you going to do about the excess weight you''re carrying around? the doctor asked. "I don''t understand it, Doc," Jonathan replied, "I just can''t seem to lose weight. I must have an overactive thyroid." "Jonathan, the tests show that your thyroid is perfectly normal," replied the doctor. "It''s your fork that''s overactive."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While his mother was having a consultation with the doctor, Little Johnny could be heard terrorizing the people in the waiting room, yet she made no attempt to restrain him. A few minutes later, they heard some clattering in an adjoining room, but still she did nothing. Finally, after an extra-loud crash, she casually said to the doctor, "I hope you don''t mind Little Johnny playing in there." "No, not at all," the doctor replied calmly. "I''m sure he''ll calm down as soon as he finds the poison."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We regret to inform you, but by opening this email, you have just received the ''Idiot Computer Virus''. Since our staff does not have any programming experience, this virus works on the honor system. Please delete all files from your hard drive immediately, then manually forward this virus to everyone on your mailing list. Thank You', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the hardest thing about rollerblading? Telling your parents that you are gay.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TO: ALL EMPLOYEES FROM: SYSTEM''S ADMINISTRATOR SUBJECT: WARNING! C-NILE VIRUS ... MUST READ: Just learned about this from a reliable source. It seems that there is a computer virus out there called the "C-Nile Virus" that even the most advanced programs from Norton cannot take care of, so be warned. It appears to affect those of us who were born before 1958. Symptoms of the C-Nile Virus: 1. Causes you to send the same e-mail twice. 2. Causes you to send blank e-mail. 3. Causes you to send e-mail to the wrong person. 4. Causes you to send e-mail back to the person who sent it to you. 5. Causes you to send e-mail to other listed persons who received the e-mail from the person who sent it to you. 6. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment. 7. Causes you to hit "SEND" before you''ve finished the', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the media askes George Bush a question about the war he says, "Uhh, Can I use a life line?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marriage "Marriages don''t last. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask myself is: is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?" - Rita Rudner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You could use your old computer to shop for a new computer online. But that seems kind of cruel, doesn''t it? Like asking your dying spouse if he or she has any cute friends. - Scott Ostler', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('While getting dressed one morning, I decided I have been spending waaaaay too much time on the computer, when I caught myself checking the lower right corner of my make-up mirror to see what time it was. - Unknown', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lemon Grove A woman was applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove. When the foreman looked over her application, he felt she was far too qualified for the job. "Look, Miss Carter," said the foreman, "do you have any actual experience in picking lemons?" "Oh, yes, I certainly do," she replied. "I''ve been divorced four times."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When the salesman dropped in to pay a visit to one of his customers, he found the office empty except for a very large dog who was emptying wastebaskets. Rubbing his eyes, he was certain they must have been playing tricks on him. "Don''t look so surprised," said the dog, "after all, this is part of my job." "This is amazing!" exclaimed the salesman. "I can''t believe it. Does you boss know what a prize he has in you? An animal that can actually talk!" "No, no," the dog pleaded, "don''t tell him. If he knows I can talk, the next thing you know he''ll have me answering the phones too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Read All About It! A newsboy was standing at the corner with a stack of newspapers, yelling, "Read all about it! Fifty people swindled! Read all about it!" Curious about it, a man walked over and bought a newspaper. After checking the front page and finding nothing, he said to the boy, "What are you talking about? I don''t see anything in here about fifty people being swindled." The newsboy ignored him and continued, yelling out, "Read all about it! Fifty-one people swindled!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kids were sitting at a lunch table. One was quite a joke-teller, so he started telling a joke he had heard. "There are three types of people in this world," he said, "those who can count and those who can''t." The other kid said, "But what about the other type of person?" "There is no other type!" the first kid said, "that was the joke!" "No! You said it wrong! You didn''t say what the third type was!" "That was the joke! TWO TYPES of people in this world! Those who can count, AND THOSE WHO CANT!" "But you didn''t say what the third type was!" So, after many hours, the second boy FINALLY understood the joke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No Smoking Prohibited Slow Children Warning: corners of sign are sharp A Street Downtown 1 Quarter Mile No Parking 2am-5am (right underneath that sign) 2 Hour parking 9am-6pm (right underneath that sign) 15 minute parking 8am-5pm Caution- water on road during rain Airplane Crossing Bear Bottom Drive Emergency telephone 174 km ahead Road hump ahead Tank Xing', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recent college graduate got hired by the human-development center of a large corporation to train the employees in proper dress code and etiquette. One day as she was stepping onto the elevator, a man who was casually dressed in jeans and a golf shirt got on with her. "Dressed a little casually today, aren''t we?" she said in a scolding tone. "That''s one of the benefits of owning the company," the man replied with a grin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are Dogs Welcome? A man wrote a letter to a small hotel located in a Midwest town he planned to visit on his vacation. He wrote, "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is very well behaved and well groomed. I would like to know if I would be permitted to keep him in my room with me at night." The hotel owner sent a reply immediately, which said, "I have been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, I have never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or anything else. I have never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly, nor have I ever had a dog run out on a hotel bill. "Yes, indeed," continued his reply, "your dog is most welcome at my hotel. Should your dog be willing to vouch for you, you are welcome to stay here too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Collecting Unemployment Ole and Sven worked together and both were laid off, so they headed over to the unemployment office. When Ole was asked his occupation, he replied, "Panty stitcher. I sew elastic onto cotton panties." The clerk looked up panty stitcher and found it classed as unskilled labor, so she gave Ole $250 a week unemployment pay. She then asked Sven what his occupation was, and he replied, "Diesel fitter." Looking up diesel fitter, the clerk found it classed as skilled labor, so she gave Sven $500 a week. When Ole found out, he was furious. He stormed back in to find out why his friend and co-worker was collecting double the amount that he was. "Panty stitchers are unskilled and diesel fitters are skilled labor," the clerk explained. "What skill?" Ole yelled. "I sew the elastic on, Sven pulls on it and says, ''Ya, diesel fitter''!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Salary Increase "I must have a raise," the man said to his boss. "There are three other companies after me." "Really?" the boss asked. "What other companies are after you?" "The gas company, the telephone company, and the electricity company," the man replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I said to the taxi driver, "King Arthur''s Close." He said, "Don''t worry, we''ll lose him at the next set of lights." - Tommy Cooper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said "Is that the local swimming baths?" He said, "It depends where you''re calling from."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I inherited a painting and a violin which turned out to be a Rembrandt and a Stradivarius. Unfortunately, Rembrandt made lousy violins and Stradivarius was a terrible painter. - Tommy Cooper', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, carrying a baby in her arms, enters a pharmacy and asks to use the infant scale to weigh the baby. The clerk explains that the infant scale is out for repair, but she could figure out the infant''s weight by weighing mother and baby together on the adult scale, then weighing the mother alone and subtracting the second amount from the first. "Oh, that will never work!" groaned the blonde. "I''m not the mother, I''m the aunt!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown - and fewer still to ignore someone completely.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe no problem is so large or so difficult that it can''t be blamed on someone else.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A father and his son, Bobby, arrive at the game - and Dad can''t find the tickets. Dad: "Nip home and see if I left the tickets there." Bobby: "No probs, Dad." Half an hour later Bobby returns to his dad who is patiently waiting outside the stadium. Bobby: "Yep, they''re on the kitchen table where you left them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A very religious man lived right next door to an atheist. While the religious one prayed day in, day out, and was constantly on his knees in communion with his Lord, the atheist never even looked twice at a church. However, the atheist''s life was good, he had a well-paid job and a beautiful wife, and his children were healthy and good-natured, whereas the pious man''s job was strenuous and his wages were low, his wife was getting fatter every day and his kids wouldn''t give him the time of the day. So one day, deep in prayer as usual, he raised his eyes towards heaven and asked: "Oh God, I honour you every day, I ask your advice for every problem and confess to you my every sin. Yet my neighbour, who doesn''t even believe in you and certainly never prays, seems blessed with every happiness, while I go poor and suffer many an indignity. Why is this?" And a great voice was heard from above: "BECAUSE HE DOESN''T BOTHER ME ALL THE TIME!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two women were sitting in the doctor''s waiting room comparing notes on their various disorders. "I want a baby more than anything in the world," said the first, "but I guess it is impossible." "I used to feel just the same way," said the second. "But then everything changed. That''s why I''m here. I''m going to have a baby in three months." "Please, tell me what you did." "I went to a faith healer." "But I''ve tried that. My husband and I went to one for nearly a year and it didn''t help a bit." The other woman whispered, "Try going alone next time, dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is important - 1. It is important to find a woman who is a good cook and housekeeper. 2. It is important to find a woman who makes good money. 3. It is important to find a woman who likes to have sex regularly. 4. It is important that these three women never meet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joseph, Mary and their son were doing chores around their home in Nazareth when suddenly, Jesus ran outside to Joseph, and asked, "Did you call me?" "No, I''m sorry," Joseph replied, "I just hit my thumb with the hammer again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abraham wanted to put Windows Vista on his computer, but Isaac was concerned: "But father, we don''t have enough memory for that!" "Don''t worry, son, God will provide the RAM."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if you can''t make me a better boy, don''t worry about it. I''m having a real good time like I am."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old Jewish men are strolling down the street one day when they happen to walk by a Catholic church. They see a big sign posted that says, "Convert to Catholicism and get $10." One of the Jewish men stops walking and stares at the sign. His friend turns to him and says, "Murray, what''s going on?" "Abe," replies Murray, "I''m thinking of doing it." Abe says, "What, are you crazy?" Murray thinks for a minute and says, "Abe, I''m going to do it." With that, Murray strides purposefully into the church and comes out twenty minutes later with his head bowed. "So," asks Abe, "did you get your ten dollars?" Murray looks up at him and says, "Is that all you people think of?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just before a new redneck had his first parachute jump, his sergeant reminded him, "Count to ten, and then pull the first rip cord. If it snarls, pull the second rip cord for your auxiliary chute. After you land, our truck will pick you up." The paratrooper took a deep breath and jumped. He counted to ten and pulled the first cord. Nothing happened. He pulled the second cord. Again, nothing happened. As he plummeted to the ground, he said to himself, "I''ll bet that truck won''t be there either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you do settle in the South and bear children, don''t think we will accept them as Southerners. After all, if the cat had kittens in the oven, we wouldn''t call ''em biscuits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here in the Kentucky hills, you don''t see too many people hang-gliding. Ol'' Zeek decided to save up and get a hang-glider. He takes it to the highest mountain, and after struggling to the top, he gets ready to take flight. He takes off running and reaches the edge and into the wind he goes! Meanwhile, Maw & Paw Abner were sitting on the porch swing, talking bout the good old days when Maw spots the biggest bird she has ever seen! "Look at the size of that bird, Paw!" she exclaims. Paw raises up; "Get my gun, Maw." Maw runs into the house, brings out his pump action shotgun. He takes careful aim. BANG..BANG..BANG...BANG! The monster-size bird continues to sail silently over the treetops. "I think ya missed him, Paw," she says. "Yeah," he replies, "but at least he let go of old Zeek!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you be sad when you are at the Sunshine Happiness Parade of Friendly Friends?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redneck Threats: - I''ll slap you so hard, your clothes will be outtalk style. - This''ll jar your preserves. - Don''t you be making'' me open a can o'' whoop-ass on yaw!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ah - The things you see with. Ay-rab - The people who inhabit much of North Africa. Bidness - The art of selling something for more than you paid for it. Bobbycue - A delectable Southern sandwich of chopped pork, coleslaw, and a fiery sauce. Bud - Small feathered creature that flies. Chekatawfarya - Heard at service stations in small Southern towns. Co-Cola - Soft drink. Crine - Weeping. Dawfins - Name of the professional football team in Miami. Doc - A condition caused by the absence of light. Etlanna - The city General Sherman burned during the war for Southern independence. Everthang - All-encompassing. Foller - Spies and private detectives spend a lot of time doing this. Git - To acquire. Goff - A game played with clubs and a little white ball.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gull - A young female. Hale - Where General Sherman went for what he did to Etlanna. Moanin - Between daybreak and noon. Motuhsickle - A two-wheeled missile with a powerful engine. Nekkid - To be unclothed. Ovair - In that direction. Own - Instead of awf. Phrasin - Very cold. Sebmup - Soft drink similar to ginger ale. Show - "It show is hot today." Spearmint - Something scientist do. Stow - Place where things are sold. Tal - What you dry off with after you take a share. Uhmukin - Someone who lives in the United States of Uhmurka. Zackly Precisely.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Redneck Compliments - Cute as a sack full of puppies. - If things get any better, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it. - Gooder than grits.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is Alabama the smartest state in the U.S.? It has four "A"s and a "B".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you think I''m a redneck tell that to my kids: Bobby Sue, Buck, Jim Bob, Bubba, Enus, Jed, Dwayne, Billy Bob, Clitus, Dale, Otis, Coy, Bo, Hattie, Cooter, Wade, Larlene, Clint, Delmont and Luther.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People always say that hard work never killed anybody. Oh yeah? When''s the last time ya ever heard of anyone who "rested to death?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The boss, to four of his employees: "I''m really sorry, but I''m going to have to let one of you go." Black employee: "I''m a protected minority." Female employee: "And I''m a woman." Oldest employee: "Fire me, buster, and I''ll hit you with an age discrimination suit so fast it''ll make your head spin." ...at which they all turn to look at the helpless young, white, male employee, who thinks a moment, then responds: "I think I might be gay..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two detectives were investigating a scene, The victims had their hands and head cut off. "It''s going to be a nightmare identifying the bodies, with no finger prints or faces" said one. The other replied, "I thought it would be rather easy, how many people do you know walking around with no head or hands?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Carton of eggs~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ $3 Ski mask~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ $14 Tickets to a Brittany concert~~~~~~ $84 Egging the crap out of America''s Pop Princess?? PRICELESS', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The company I work for sometimes puts on what they call "Lunch and Learn" seminars during the employees'' lunchtime, dealing with a variety of physical and mental health issues. If the seminar lasts beyond the normal lunch hour, we''re supposed to get managerial approval to attend. So, last week, this flier came around: LUNCH AND LEARN SEMINAR: WHO''S CONTROLLING YOUR LIFE? (Get your manager''s permission before attending)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mistake: to err, to cause an error or make a mess; If a barber makes a mistake, it''s a new style... If a driver makes a mistake, it is an accident... If a politician makes a mistake, it is a new law... If a scientist makes a mistake, it is a new invention... If a tailor makes a mistake, it is a new fashion... If a teacher makes a mistake, it is a new theory... If our boss makes a mistake, it is our mistake... If an employee makes a mistake, it is a "MISTAKE."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill today because they pissed me off. Also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today, as they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a women found out that she was pregnant, she lit up the phone lines telling everyone the good news. One day, she took her 4 year old son, Sam, out shopping. A woman asked the boy if he was excited about the baby. "Yes," he said. "I know what we''re going to name it. If it is a girl, we''re calling her Molly and if it is a boy, we''re going to call it Quits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Happiness doesn''t bring money. I want to be what I was when I wanted to be what I''m now. The government has at least one problem for every solution. Only the conservatives can make the country like it used to be - a huge swamp full of dinosaurs. Democracy is having freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the thoughtfulness to use neither one. If you don''t go to other people''s funerals, they won''t come to yours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a group of Jew baritones and sopranos singing? Soap opera.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As the Broadway showgirls were dressing for a performance, one of them noticed her friend was no longer sporting a flashy engagement ring. "What happened, Lily?" she asked, pointing to the bare finger. "The wedding off?" "Yeah," Lily admitted. "I saw him in a bathing suit last week, and he looked so different without his wallet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Back in the days of old, Before condoms were invented, Knights wrapped socks Around their cocks, And babies were prevented.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Things You Don''t Want to Hear When Regaining Consciousness. Has anyone seen my watch? That was some party last night. I can''t remember when I''ve been that drunk. Well, this book doesn''t say that... What edition is your manual? Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie. If I can just remember how they did this on ER last week. What do you mean, he''s not insured? Let''s hurry; I don''t want to miss "Baywatch." That laughing gas stuff is pretty cool. Can I have some more of that? Of course I''ve performed this operation before, Nurse!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here''s a little list of "Doc-isms" - What doctors say, and what they''re really thinking: "I''d like to have my associate look at you." He''s going through a messy divorce and owes me a bundle. "Do you suppose all this stress could be affecting your nerves?" You''re crazier''n a loon. Now, if I can only find a shrink who''ll split fees with me ... "There is a lot of that going around." My God, that''s the third one this week. I''d better learn something about this. "If those symptoms persist, call for an appointment." I''ve never heard of anything so disgusting. Thank God I''m off next week. "Why don''t we make another appointment later in the week?" I''m playing golf this afternoon, and this a waste of time. - or - I need the bucks, so I''m charging you for another office visit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a stifling hot day and a man fainted in the middle of a busy intersection. Traffic quickly piled up in all directions, and a woman rushed to help him. When she knelt down to loosen his collar, a man emerged from the crowd, pushed her aside, and said, "It''s all right honey, I''ve had a course in first aid." The woman stood up and watched as he took the ill man''s pulse and prepared to administer artificial respiration. At this point she tapped him on the shoulder and said, "When you get to the part about calling a doctor, I''m already here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A defendant was asked if he wanted a bench trial or a jury trial. "Jury trial," the defendant replied. "Do you understand the difference?" asked the judge. "Sure," replied the defendant, "That''s where twelve ignorant people decide my fate instead of one."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Judge: Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this case? Juror: I don''t want to be away from my job that long. Judge: Can''t they do without you at work? Juror: Yes, but I don''t want them to know it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, but you can never fool a Mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children are natural mimics, who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There is only one pretty child in the world and every parent has it. - Chinese Proverb. A child''s greatest period of growth is the month after you''ve purchased new school clothes. The best inheritance parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A married couple was celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. At the party everybody wanted to know how they managed to stay married so long in this day and age. The husband responded, "When we were first married we came to an agreement - I would make all the major decisions and my wife would make all the minor decisions. And now, after 60 years of marriage, I can truthfully say that we have never needed to make a MAJOR decision."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One way to take care of the world''s population. The IRS has reported the "disappearance" of more than 8 million American children during the late 1980s, "caused" by tax reform legislation. That number is the total of all children claimed as dependents of beneficiaries of child care tax credits before 1987 but who were never again claimed once the IRS started requiring proof that such children existed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little four-year-old Jenny was looking at her new baby brother for the first time. He was fast asleep. After staring at her tiny, motionless baby brother for a few minutes, Jenny looked up at her mother and asked plaintively, "Didn''t he come with batteries?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My husband and I had just finished tucking our five young ones into bed one evening when we heard sobbing coming from three-year-old Billy''s room. Rushing to his side, we found him crying hysterically. He had accidentally swallowed a penny and was sure he was going to die - no amount of talking could change his mind. Desperate to calm him, my husband palmed a penny that he happened to have in his pocket and pretended to pull it from Billy''s ear. Billy was delighted. In a flash, he snatched it from my husband''s hand, swallowed it, and demanded cheerfully, "Do it again, Dad!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman and her lover are in bed, when there''s a knock on the door. She says, "It must be my husband! Ok, I''ll handle this." She grabs the trash bin, opens the door and, smiling sweetly, says to her husband, "Darling, please empty the trash." While he is out, the other man escapes and walks back home. He thinks, "She is sooo smart, unlike my wife." He comes up to his door and knocks, his wife opens the door, and hands him the trash bin, saying, "Darling, please empty the trash bin." He carries the basket, thinking, "What a stupid bitch! The whole damn day at home, and can''t find some time to empty the trash!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a girl needs advice, why can''t her brother help her? Because he can''t be a brother and assist her too. (And a sister too!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A precocious 4-year-old was brought to the ER with a severe cough, a nurse writes. She kept up a non-stop conversation while I was trying to assess her lung sounds. Finally, I said, "Shhh, I have to see if Barney is in there." The child looked at me and said, "I have Jesus in my heart. Barney is on my underwear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think - therefore I''m single. (Lizz Winstead) In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. (Margaret Thatcher) When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. (Elayne Boosler) I''m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I''m not dumb... and I also know that I''m not blonde. (Dolly Parton) I''m not going to vacuum ''till Sears makes one you can ride on. (Roseanne Barr) If men can run the world, why can''t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck? (Linda Ellerbee)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I only know the names of two angels. Hark and Harold. Gregory, 5 Everybody''s got it all wrong. Angels don''t wear halos any more. I forget why, but scientists are working on it. Olive, 9 It''s not easy to become an angel! First, you die. Then you go to heaven, and then there''s still the flight training to go through. And then you got to agree to wear those angel clothes. Matthew, 9 Angels work for God and watch over kids when God has to go do something else. Mitchell, 7 My guardian angel helps me with math, but he''s not much good for science. Henry, 8 Angels don''t eat, but they drink milk from Holy Cows! Jack, 6 Angels talk all the way while they''re flying you up to heaven. The main subject is where you went wrong before you got dead. Daniel, 9', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When an angel gets mad, he takes a deep breath and counts to ten. And when he lets out his breath, somewhere there''s a tornado. Reagan, 10 Angels have a lot to do and they keep very busy. If you lose a tooth, an angel comes in through your window and leaves money under your pillow. Then when it gets cold, angels go north for the winter. Sara, 6 Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his son, who''s a very good carpenter. Jared, 8 All angels are girls because they gotta wear dresses and boys didn''t go for it. Antonio, 9 My angel is my grandma who died last year. She got a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth. Katelynn, 9 Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and pets. And if they don''t make the animals get better, they help the child get over it. Vicki, 8 What I don''t get about angels is why, when someone is in love, they shoot arrows at them. Sarah, 7', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man rushed into a bar and ordered a double martini. The man downed it with one swallow, put a five dollar bill on the bar, and turned and rushed out of the bar. The bartender picked up the five dollar bill, and folded it carefully and tucked it in his vest pocket. Just at that moment he looked up at the boss standing in the doorway staring at him. Doing a bit of fast thinking he said, "Hi boss, did you see that fellow just now? Came in here, bought a double martini, gave me a five dollar tip, and rushed out without paying."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t you take a Pokemon in the shower with you? Answer: Because it''ll Pikachu! (peek at you...)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was sitting in a bar and noticed a group of people using sign language. He also noticed that the bartender was using sign language to speak to them. When the bartender returned to him, the man asked how he had learned to use sign language. The bartender explained that these were regular customers and had taught him to speak in sign. The man thought that was great. A few minutes later the man noticed that the people in the group were waving their hands around very wildly. The bartender looked over and signed, "Now cut that out! I warned you!" and threw the group out of the bar. The man asked why he had done that and the bartender said, "If I''ve told them once I''ve told them 100 times - NO SINGING IN THE BAR!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s forty below zero one winter "night" in Alaska. Pat is drinking at his local saloon and the bartender says to him, "You owe me quite a bit on your tab." "Sorry," says Pat, "I''m flat broke this week." "That''s okay," says the bartender. "I''ll just write your name and the amount you owe me right here on the wall." "But," says Pat, "I don''t want any of my friends to see that." "They won''t," says the bartender. "I''ll just hang your parka over it until it''s paid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a martini. The bartender asks, "Olive or twist?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a bird and a fly? Well, a bird can fly . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man applied for a job as an industrial spy. Together with several other applicants, he was given a sealed envelope and told to take it to the fourth floor. As soon as the man was alone, he stepped into an empty hallway and opened the envelope. Inside, a message read: "You''re our kind of person. Report to the fifth floor Personnel Office."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their jobs. Sam Goldwyn.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After Receiving an Invitation to an Inventors'' Ball: Edison thought it would be an illuminating experience. Watt reckoned it would be a good way to let off steam. Stephenson thought the whole idea was loco. Wilbur Wright accepted, provided he and Orville could get a flight. Morse''s reply: "I''ll be there on the dot. Can''t stop now must dash."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Psychiatrist to his nurse: "Just say we''re very busy. Don''t keep saying ''It''s a madhouse.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the dentist of the year get? ..A little plaque.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know policemen are strong? Because they can hold up traffic. What do termites eat for breakfast? Oakmeal. What do massage therapists eat for dinner? Spa-ghetti. Why were the suspenders arrested? For holding up a pair of pants. How does the queen bee get around her hive? She''s throne. What do bees do if they don''t want to drive? Wait at the buzz stop. Two fish were in a tank. One said to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?" What''s the friendliest school? Hi school. What do you give a dog with a fever? Mustard. (It''s good for a hot dog.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Frank was getting ready to go on a trip to New York for the first time, and was talking to his friend Bill. Bill: "While you are in New York, there is a bar that you have to go to. When you walk through the front door, you are handed a free drink. Then you can go to the back room and get laid. Come back up to the bar, and you get another free drink. Then you can get laid again. It goes on like this all night." Frank: "That sounds unbelievable. Have you really been there?" Bill: "No, but my sister has."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. None. It''s all right. I''ll just sit here in the dark. Don''t worry about me...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harry was in the hospital. He was an old man, and from time to time the young nurse would come in and say in a patronising tone, "And how are we doing this morning?" Well, this is a story of revenge. Harry had received breakfast, and had taken the juice off the tray, putting it on his stand. Now, he had been given a urine bottle to fill - the juice was apple juice; you know where the juice went. The nurse came in, picked up the urine bottle and said, "It seems we are a little cloudy today..." At this, Harry snatched the bottle out of her hand, and drank the contents, saying, "Well, I''ll run it through again, maybe I can filter it better this time."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can a person living in Minnesota be buried in Milwaukee?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I passed my ethics exam. Naturally, I cheated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pablo Picasso surprised a burglar at work in his new chateau. The intruder got away, but Picasso told the police he could do a rough sketch of what he looked like. On the basis of his drawing, the police arrested a mother superior, the minister of finance, a washing machine, and the Eiffel tower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve just had the most awful time, said a boy to his friends. "First I got angina pectoris, then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering, I got psoriasis. They gave me hypodermics, and to top it all, tonsillitis was followed by appendectomy." "Wow! How did you pull through?" sympathized his friends. "I don''t know," the boy replied. "Toughest spelling test I ever had."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English professor complained to the pet shop proprietor, "The parrot I purchased uses improper language." "I''m surprised," said the owner. "I''ve not taught that bird to swear." "Oh, it isn''t that," explained the professor, "but yesterday I heard him split an infinitive."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two anthropologists fly to the South Sea islands to study the natives. They go to two adjacent islands and set to work. A few months later one of them takes a canoe over to the other island to see how his colleague is doing. When he gets there, he finds the other anthropologist standing among a group of natives. "Greetings! How is it going?" says the visiting anthropologist. "Wonderful!" says the other, "I have discovered an important fact about the local language! Watch!" He points at a palm tree and says, "What is that?" The natives, in unison, say "Umbalo-gong!" He then points at a rock and says, "and that?" The natives again intone "Umbalo-gong!" "You see!" says the beaming anthropologist, "They use the SAME word for ''rock'' and for ''palm tree''!" "That is truly amazing!" says the astonished visiting anthropologist, "On the other island, the same word means ''index finger''!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tourist was being led through the swamps of Florida. "Is it true," he asked, "that an alligator won''t attack you if you carry a flashlight?" "That depends," replied the guide, "on how fast you carry the flashlight."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went into a deli shop and took a seat at the lunch counter. "Give me a corned beef sandwich," he ordered. "Corned beef sandwich is not on the menu, but I can give you a sandwich with corned beef in it, like our Midnight Special." "What''s a Midnight Special?" "A triple decker with corned beef, tongue, bologna, tomato, lettuce, onion, pickle and mayonnaise, on toasted raisin bread." "Could you just place a piece of corned beef between two slices of white bread and serve it to me on a plate?" "Why, sure!" Then, turning to the sandwich man, he sang out: "One Midnight Special. Make it one deck, hold the tongue, bologna, tomato, lettuce, onion, pickle and mayonnaise, and make the raisin bread white, untoasted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An agriculture student said to a farmer: "Your methods are too old-fashioned. I wouldn''t be surprised if this tree gave you less than twenty pounds of apples." "Wouldn''t surprise me, either," said the farmer, "this is an orange tree."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The person who spends all of today bragging about what he is going to accomplish tomorrow probably did the very same thing yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Any time four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t argue with an idiot. He may be doing the same thing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do not try to guess your wife''s size. Just buy her anything marked "petite" and hold on to the receipt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knowledge cannot enter the head via an open mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Astronomy is looking up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rap is to music as Etch-A-Sketch is to fine art.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Join the fight against brutality.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Helen Waite is our credit manager. If you want credit, go to Helen Waite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why isn''t there a tax on stuff I DON''T like?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day at a school for the deaf (hearing impaired), they decide to have one of the students lead a pep rally for the football team. Here''s how it went. Rally leader: What are we gonna do? Ralliers: Defeat them! RL: I can''t hear you! R: Defeat them! RL: I can''t hear you! R: Defeat them! RL: I can''t hear you! R: Defeat them! RL: I can''t hear you!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was at a party and the host was getting worried because there were too many people and not enough refreshments. She was sure that not all of these people had been invited but didn''t know how to tell which ones were the crashers. Then her husband got an idea.... He turned to the crowd of guests and said, "Will those who are from the bride''s side of the family stand up please?" About twenty people stood. Then he asked, "Will those who are from the groom''s side of the family stand up as well?" About twenty five people stood up. Then he smiled and said, "Will all those who stood please leave, this is a birthday party."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, two children are bickering on the playground. Kid 1: My mom says that kids who get whatever they want are spoiled and rotten and stuck-up. Kid 2: Well, I''m not spoiled. Kid 1: Yeah, you are, you get everything you want. Kid 2: I don''t get everything I want. Kid 1: Yeah, you do. Kid 2: No, I don''t, because I "want" you to shut-up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a shepherd you herd your sheep into your barn. As you walk away you hear two wolves in the barn. What do you do? I would get the flock out of there!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following is something actually said by my dad. I wanted to see what my dad would say if I said I might be gay, here was his reaction. YOU''D BETTER NOT BE!! EVEN IF I HAVE TO BUY YOU SOME PUSSY, YOU WILL NOT BE GAY!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they call it "PMS"? Because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken. (Apologies to anyone who''s offended - but it IS funny, which is the only valid test of a joke; if it''s funny and someone is offended by it, considering WHY they''re offended even though it''s a joke can provide insight into their attitude toward the topic.) "I learned the truth from Lenny Bruce" - Paul Simon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Marble is a valuable building material and should not be taken for granite.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 27999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I learned French in six easy liasons.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When a man wants to believe something, it doesn''t take much to convince him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Earlier today, I took a glimpse at the news. They were doing a report on a new recipe for twinkies. Now they will taste healthier, but still have the same amount of calories, because of course, people can taste health.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re multipurpose. Not only do they put the clips on, but they take them off. - Pratt & Whitney spokesperson explaining why the company charged the Air Force nearly $1000 for an ordinary pair of pliers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers. - Socrates (470 - 399 BC)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('British Columbia, Canada: Police officers on patrol about 1:00 am spotted 4 men breaking into a vehicle. They gave chase on foot, catching and arresting two of the men. The other two escaped. A couple of hours later, two men showed up at the main desk of the police station, asking when their buddies were going to be released. They were carrying (and wearing) items which had been stolen from the car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Democratic National Committee finally released thousands of pages of financial disclosure information. Says Vince Vieceli, "Unfortunately, they released them from a third-floor balcony in New York during the parade for the Yankees."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 10pm curfew was imposed in Belfast, and everybody had to be off the streets or risk being shot. However, one citizen was shot at 9.45pm. "Why did you do that?" the soldier was asked by his superior officer. "I know where he lives," came the reply, "and he wouldn''t have made it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a pet shop and says to the owner, "Do your Shih Tzu dogs breed well?" The owner says,"Sure they do." After a minute, the man says, with a grin, "What about your bull dogs?" "Yes they breed well, too." The man, happy with this, buys both. The owner asks, "Why do you need to know that anyway?" The man replies, "I''m going to go home and breed a bullshit!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(Told You So)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you want me to give you a knuckle sandwich? "Sure, but I want it cut into triangles and with the crust peeled off."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seems Paris Hilton is having visits from a speech therapist - she''s having trouble finishing a sentence!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Grocery List; (noun) A piece of paper you spend half an hour writing, and then forget to take with you to the store.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lipstick; (noun) On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Foreign Film Any movie shown in a Texas theater that isn''t a western.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Battle Where a whole lot of white men kill a few Indians. Massacre Where a whole lot of Indians kill a few white men.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man A remarkable animal whose head swells when you pat his back. Woman Creature who acts nice to you because she doesn''t like you, or mean, because she does. People Some make things happen, some watch things happen, and the majority has no idea what''s happened. Optimist Girl who regards a bulge as a curve. Pessimist Man who looks for a pink slip before the money in his pay envelope.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Magazine Bunch of printed pages that tell you what''s coming in the next issue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond man, Mark, was going to France over the summer. So he asked the advice of his friend, who had been to Paris last year. "Oh!" his friend said, "The food in France is fabulous! Be sure to ask about their frog legs." "FROG legs? Really?" Mark couldn''t believe it. "Yeah. It seems strange, doesn''t it?" Mark agreed to ask. A month later, Mark flew to France. He had a wonderful time seeing the sights, and forgot all about his friend''s advice until his very last night, right before dinner. He was already seated at a table, and soon a waiter walked up to him to take his order. "Well..." Mark pondered, "I''m not sure what I want." He decided to ask, then and there. "Say- do you have frog legs?" "But of course!" replied the waiter, proud of the quality of his restaurant. Mark turned a shade of white. It was true! "Are you okay, sir?" "I''m... fine," Mark said, recovering well, "Hop on over and bring me a sandwich!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Henry IV were cloned, would he be Henry V, or Henry IV Jr. or, would he be Henry IV Part II? (Willy Wagstaff, more usually known as William Shakespeare)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Another Month Ends: All Targets Met, All Systems Working, All Customers Satisfied, All Staff Eager and Enthusiastic, All Pigs Fed and Ready to Fly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I travelled to the end of the rainbow, As Dame Fortune did intend, Murphy would be there to tell me, The pot''s at the other end.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elephant is talking to a hippopotamus, and the elephant says, "You know, there''s nothing worse than a cold in the nose." The hippo says, "Oh yeah? Did you never have chapped lips?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cleanliness is next to Godliness Why do they say that? I looked it up in the dictionary, "goggles" is next to "godliness"; cleanliness is next to claustrophobia.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What sits on a window sill, hums, and dies mysteriously 91 days after you bring it home? - An air conditioner with a 90 day warranty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do melons get married in church? - Because they cantaloupe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are a lot of words you can use to describe men -strong, caring, loving. They''d be wrong, but you could still use them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Newton''s Little-Known Seventh Law - A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Murphy''s Law of Cable TV If you have watched a TV series only once, and you watch it again, it will be a rerun of the same episode.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little old lady goes into the store to do some shopping. She is bewildered over the large selection of toilet paper. "Pardon me, sir," she says to the store manager, "but can you explain the differences in all these toilet papers?" "Well," he replies pointing out one brand, "this is as soft as a baby''s kiss. It''s $1.50 per roll." He grabs another and says, "This is nice and soft as a bunny, strong but gentle, and it''s $1.00 a roll." Pointing to the bottom shelf he tells her, "We call that our No Name brand, and it''s 20 cents per roll." "Give me the No Name," she says. She comes back about a week later, seeks out the manager and says, "Hey! I''ve got a name for your No Name toilet paper. I call it John Wayne." "Why?" he asks. "Because it''s ROUGH, it''s TOUGH and it DON''T TAKE CRAP OFF ANYBODY!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Don''t you have some laundry to do or something? Oh, you are so cute when you get all pissed off. You''re just upset because your butt is beginning to spread. Wait a minute - I get it. What time of the month is it? Shouldn''t you consult the great Oprah on this one? Sorry. I was just picturing you naked. Whoa, time out. Football is on. Looks like someone had an extra bowl of B#%$@! flakes this morning! Is there any way we can do this via e-mail? Who are you kidding? We both know that thing ain''t loaded.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remember the Golden Rule He who has the gold makes the rules.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just when you get really good at something, you don''t need to do it any more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just when you find something you really like, they stop making it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Prudhomme''s Law of Window Washing It''s on the OTHER side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Bush toured parts of Missouri that were devastated by a recent tornado. There was one awkward moment, when the President looked at the tornado damage and said, "Don''t worry, we''re going to get whoever did this."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What kind of soup do dogs like? A: Chicken Poodle! ___________________________________________ Q: Why DIDN''T the skeleton cross the road? A: Because he didn''t have the guts! ___________________________________________ Q: What''s purple and makes you burp? A: BELCH''S Grape Juice!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Aquariums + Gratitude = FISH THANKS! 2. Orange Bear + A Ghost = WINNIE THE BOO! 3. Saint Nick + A Grizzly Bear = Santa Claws! 4. Skunk + Kangaroo = STINK-A-ROO!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sheriff of the small Kansas town pulled over a Porsche that was doing 75 miles per hour in a 35 mile an hour zone. The man behind the wheel, a Chicago commodities trader, was steaming. When he was finally brought before the local magistrate, he exploded, "I can''t believe you stopped me. This town must be the asshole of the world!" The magistrate replied, "And you''ll be what''s passing through?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People who want to inform you of their religious views almost never want to hear yours.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Covina, Calif: I recall reading something years ago about the Pledge of Allegiance. Some child thought it began, "I led the pigeons to the flag." Cleveland, Ohio: When I was little, I often wondered who Richard Stands was. You know - "I pledge allegiance to the flag and to the Republic for Richard Stands."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Anybody can win. Unless, of course, there happens to be a second entry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A person soon learns how little he knows when a child begins to ask questions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A business man in Chicago had occasion to write a Japanese friend in Tokyo. Mindful of the Oriental''s appreciation of flowery language and of his own duty to the cause of good public relations, he ended his letter with the wish, "May Heaven preserve you always." To the delight of the business man''s office staff, the Japanese responded with, "May Heaven pickle you, too."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The one who says it cannot be done should never interrupt the one who is doing it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. All of you, stand in a straight circle. 2. I have two daughters, and both are girls! 3. Both the three of you get out of the class. 4. I saw you with my wife.....in the theatre. 5. Open the windows let the Airforce come in. 6. Boys go to the right, girls to the left. The rest follow me. 7. How dare you look at the monkey outside the window when I''m sitting here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All things are possible - except skiing through a revolving door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man woke up in the morning to see that the whole house was all messy. Clothes were all over the room. Coffee beans were spilled on the kitchen floor. Even the house was teepeed with toilet paper. Back in the living room, a note read: Dear Honey, I have gone shopping for a little while. Sorry if I left the house a little messy. I don''t know when I''ll be back. After reading the note, he calls her. "Where are the couch, TV, and coffee machine?" "Uhh, that''s a funny story." She hangs up, and their 23-year old son walks in. "Austin! Where is my wife?" "Oh, that. You drank like crazy and fell asleep. When she was pulling you back to bed, you woke up, punched her, spun her around in the air and threw her in the toilet. She told me she would move after I trashed the place with her." "So whose wife was that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a redneck is married? There are tobacco stains on both sides of his pickup.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All members of Mensa have I.Q.s of at least 140. At one Mensa convention, several members at a local cafe noticed the shaker with an S on top, for salt, contained pepper and their pepper shaker, with a P on top, was full of salt. How could they swap the contents of the bottles without spilling anything and using only the implements at hand? Clearly, here was the marvellous Mensa mystery! They presented ideas, debated them, and finally came up with what they felt was a brilliant solution involving a napkin, a straw, and an empty saucer. They called the blonde waitress over to dazzle her with their solution. "Ma''am," they said, "we couldn''t help but notice that the pepper shaker contains salt and the salt shaker contains..." "Oh, sorry!" interrupted the blonde waitress. "Here," and she unscrewed the caps of both bottles and switched them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 6''4" man hit a midget in the rear while at a red light. The midget gets out of his car and comes up to the man and says, "I''m NOT happy!" and the man replied, "Which one are you, then?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A terrific explosion occurs in a gunpowder factory, and once all the mess has been cleared up, and inquiry begins. One of the few survivors is asked to make a statement. "Okay, Phillips," says the investigator, "you were near the scene - what happened?" "Well, it''s like this. Old Fred Wilson was in the mixing room, and I saw him take a cigarette out of his pocket and light up." "He was smoking in the mixing room?" the investigator said in stunned horror, "How long had he been with the company?" "About 20 years, sir." "Twenty years in the company, then he goes and strikes a match in the mixing room! I''d have thought it would have been the last thing he''d have done." "It was, sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so heavy that she sank the Titanic. Yo Momma so stupid that she came up to George Bush and called him gay and Hitler #2. Yo Momma so old that she saw Abraham Lincoln die. Yo Momma so slow that she was mistaken for a rock. Yo Momma so stupid that she thinks she''s a man! Yo Momma so weak that when she walks into a bar they have to feed her like a baby!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a king who was memorizing a script to tell everyone in the land that everyone got free chocolate. But really it was filled with poison to kill them all. A guard walked by and said in a whisper, "Remember it is filled with poison, but do not say it is filled with poison. Understand?" The King responded, "Yes, I do." The king was deaf in one ear so he often times missed what people say. He walked up to the microphone. He said, "I know you all love delicous chocolate. So I''ve decided to give you all special gift. Who want''s to know?" Everyone hollered out "I do!" So the king hollered, "Okay then! Free Poisonous Chocolate for all!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A busdriver was driving 50 kids to camp. They were passing a big deep lake that was beautiful and cyan. One kid asked the nice busdriver, "Can we go in that lake?" The busdriver replies "sure. can you swim?" The kids say, "Yes but only in very, very shallow water." The busdriver never saw this lake before, he thought it was shallow. People nearby were stunned to see a bus full of kids turn and drive right into the lake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend works in a post office. One day, a man handed ten postcards to my friend and ask her to put them in the mailbox. She noticed that they had all been addressed but none of them contained a message, so she asked the man why the postcards nothing written on them. The man said, "I told everyone that I''d send postcards, but I didn''t say I''d write a message."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A bachelor asked his friend to find him the perfect mate: "I want a companion who is small and cute, loves water sports and enjoys group activities." Without thinking, his friend replied: "Marry a penguin."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves. - W. C. Fields.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandson is four and can recite the whole Gettysburg Address. Abraham Lincoln couldn''t do it until he was fifty-four. - Sam Levenson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Quick - Cheap - Good Pick 2. - Dennis Robertus.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('America is a land of untold wealth. - Internal Revenue Service.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a boy who never, ever lied. He always told people the truth and/or his opinion. Like when he broke a glass vase, he said that he broke it. He was rewarded a few days later for telling the truth, even though he was grounded. One day a lady asked him, "What do you think of my dress? It cost me thousands of dollars." The boy replied, "That is the most stupid dress I have ever seen in my life, and will haunt me in my afterlife! It''s more terrible than a fifty-year old swine that was drowned in mud when it was three! I think you should go back to the garbage disposal and feed it to a goat!" He said all that truthfully. After he said that, the lady called 911 and he went to juvenile hall.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a customer walked into a pet shop and told the clerk, "I need two small, gray mice and about five dozen roaches." Puzzled, the shop attendant asked the reason for this strange request. "Well, I''m moving out of my apartment and my lease told me that I must leave the premises in exactly the same condition I found them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a magical mirror that showed the prettiest and ugliest people in the world. The mirror said that May Honzirop was the prettiest and the ugliest was Shakira Hobo. May was going to go in front of millions of people to get a Guinness world record. The mirror said, the day before May went on stage, "I think you''ll brag about all your "success" and just become unpopular again." May replied, "SHUT UP, YOU STUPID MIRROR! I WILL THROW YOU AWAY AFTER I''M DONE!" It was the next day. She was on stage with Shakira Hobo. She announced, "Now the mirror will choose the prettiest and the ugliest people." The mirror was still upset, but decided to answer anyway. The mirror announced to about 25 million people, "The prettiest person is Shakira Hobo, and the ugliest is May Honzirop, and that is the truth!" Everyone laughed at May. The mirror said, "Payback!" A minute later, May was pelted with tomatoes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John always bullied Pat, so Pat invited him to the meat factory. The next day, on the menu at McDonalds, there was a new thing called: Bully Big Mac, and John french fries.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Little Susie got her "monthly bleeding" for the first time in her life. Having failed to understand what was going on and being really frightened, she decided to share her trouble with little Johnny. Having found Johnny she told and showed him what her problem was. Johnny''s face grew serious and he said, "You know, I''m not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three gay guys where swiming in a pool, some white stuff floats to the top, and one of the gay guys screams, "Alright, who farted!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a Mexican''s favorite sport!? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Cross Country', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four blondes are shipwrecked on an island. They meet a wizard who is very bored and gives them each one wish. The first one is too stupid to listen to the wizard and she swims away and drowns. The second one says, "I wish I was 10 times as smart as I am now," and she makes a wooden raft and floats away. The third one says, "I wish I was 100 times smarter than I am now," and she builds a rowboat and rows to the mainland. The last one says, "I wish I was a 100,000,000,000,000 times smarter than those three combined," and she turns into a man and walks acrosss the bridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A New Yorker, a redneck and a Mexican go in to the bathroom, and start to wash. The Mexican and the New Yorker start to wash their hands. The Mexican says, "At my school they taught me to use a paper towel to dry your hands, so they get dry." The New Yorker says, "My teacher told me to use the dryers, so we save trees." At that time, the red neck finishes his ''business'', and right before opening the bathroom door, the Mexican said, "Gross, man, you did not wash your hands!" The redneck says, "Well, my teacher taught me to not piss on my hands."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so poor, she hangs the toilet paper out to dry!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a woman with no asshole? Divorced.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(A continuation of Joke #7939 Idiot #9 - - - - - - A woman called the cops from her house and said, "My ex-boyfriend stole my pot!" So the police went to the ex-boyfriends house, took the marijuana, and arrested him. The same officer went to the woman''s house and asked her to identify if it was her pot. She confirmed it was hers, and was taken away in the police car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt. - Abraham Lincoln.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. - Thomas Alva Edison.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one book, what would it be? I always say, "How to Build a Boat". - Steven Wright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you like the new car Alice and I just bought? Tom asked onerously.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The man looked a little worried when the doctor came in to administer his annual physical, so the first thing the doctor did was to ask whether anything was troubling him. "Well, to tell the truth, Doc, yes," answered the patient. "You see, I seem to be getting forgetful. I''m never sure I can remember where I put the car, or whether I answered a letter, or where I''m going, or what it is I''m going to do once I get there - if I get there; so I really need your help. What can I do?" The doctor mused for a moment, then answered in his kindest tones, "Pay me in advance."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our young daughter had adopted a stray cat. To my distress, he began to use the back of our new sofa as a scratching post. "Don''t worry," my husband reassured me. "I''ll have him trained in no time." I watched for several days as my husband patiently "trained" our new pet. Whenever the cat scratched, my husband deposited him outdoors to teach him a lesson. The cat learned quickly. For the next 16 years, whenever he wanted to go outside, he scratched the back of the sofa.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why shouldn''t you tell a secret around a clock? Because time will tell.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a really big joke? JOKE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Want to hear a backwards joke? ekoj', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with ''P'' and ends in ''orn'' : Popcorn', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this cat who loved to get drunk, who went to the bar on the other side of the tracks. He stayed all night long and got so wasted he could barely stand up, much less walk. The cat starts to stumble home, and when he came to the train tracks, he didn''t notice a train coming down the tracks. As he started to cross the tracks, the train zoomed by, and cut off his tail. The cat turned his head to see the damage, got his head stuck into the side of a speeding box car, and is instantly decapitated. The moral of the story don''t lose your head over a piece of tail!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross a rooster and an owl? A cock that stays up all night!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy in sitting in a bar hving a drink. All of a sudden an alien sits down next to him, licks its finger and sticks it in the guys ear. The guy''s a little annoyed, but doesn''t say anything. The next thing he knows, the alien does it again. this time the guy tells him to quit. Five minutes later, it happens again. This time he yells at him to stop. Ten minutes later, he finds a finger in his ear. Finally, he jumps up and screams, "If you don''t quit I''m gonna rip your balls off!". the alien thinks about it for a second, and does it again. The guy jumps up, pulls its pants down, but there was nothing there! In frustration he asks, "How do you screw?!" the alien smiles and sticks his finger in the guys ear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The next time you are having a bad day, imagine this: You are a Siamese Twin. Your brother, attached at your shoulder is gay. You are not. He has a date coming over tonight. You only have one ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('SPERM 1: Are we EVER going to reach the egg? SPERM 2: Stop moaning, we''ve only just passed the tonsils.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the differance between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The Taste...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man and a woman and they lived on a farm. They owned two horses, but they could not tell the difference between them! One day, the man painted a yellow stripe on the tail of one of the horses. When winter came, and the yellow had washed out from all the rain, the man and woman were left to stand there next to each other, staring at the horses. After two minutes of staring, the woman finally said, "I''ve got it! The black horse is taller than the white horse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the eyeglasses maker who moved his shop to an island off Alaska and is now known as an optical Aleutian?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer? A good lawyer knows the law; a great lawyer knows the judge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy is sitting in a bar with his friends bitching about going home to his wife. His friends ask him why he doesn''t want to go home to such a fine looking woman and he replies... "Well, the problem is that she has Gonnorrhea" So what say the friends, flip her over. "Well, she also has diarrhea" the guy says. "Yuck, but what about her mouth." The friends chime in. "Halitosis" the man says. "Damn, Why would you stay with her?" The friends say. "Well," the guy replies "She also has worms, and you guys know how I like to fish."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A truck driver picks up a woman hitch hiker on the side o the road. He pulls over on the side of the road a few blocks down and the woman asks him what he is doing? He asks her if she wants to have sex? She says "I can''t I''m on my period." He says "That doesn''t matter." So they get in the back of the cab and he is eating her out. A police officer drives by and sees the truck rocking. So he gets out and knocks on the door of the truck. The truck driver opens the door and asks if he can help the officer. The officer asks him what he is doing? He says licking his fingers "Eating Pizza!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four gay guys walk into a gay bar and they find a problem. There''s only one stool left. One guy says "Lets flip for it" But another says "No, Lets flip it over"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey. Pardon me, but you''ve obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn. I''d like to help you out. Which way did you come in? I''m busy now. Can I ignore you some other time? If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive. I don''t know what makes you so stupid, but it really works! Have you considered suing your brains for non-support? Don''t you need a license to be that ugly? I see the wheel is spinning, but the hamster looks dead. If you had another brain, it would be lonely.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two nuns were shopping in a food store and happened to be passing the beer and liquor section. One asks the other if she would like a beer. The nun answered, "That would be good, but I''d be uneasy about purchasing it." The 1st nun said she would handle it and picked up a six pack and took it to the cashier. The cashier had a surprised look on her face, so the nun said, "This is for washing our hair." Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under the counter and put a package of pretzel sticks in the bag with the beer saying, "Here, don''t forget the curlers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. With a little effort, you could pull the bags under your eyes over your head. 2. When the professor calls out your name during attendance, you rhythmically cry out "In da'' house!" 3. Your dirty laundry has become the closest thing to wall-to-wall carpeting. 4. Every study group you join gets fed up with your need to take a break for techno and grinding. 5. All your stories begin with, "I was so wasted..." 6. Your Native American name would''ve been "Man of Running Body Fluids." 7. You refer to sunlight as a "that bright shit." 8. You look forward to the weekdays as a time to relax. 9. Whenever you see a blinking "Do Not Walk" sign, you think how great it would look if you were on ecstasy. 10. All your stories end with, "...and that''s when everything got blurry."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, Knock Who''s there? Cows go. Cows go who? No, silly! Cows go moo!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are two ants living in a girl''s pair of panties. One day they decide to go exploring in the caves. They said to meet back in the same spot in and hour. So, one ant went in one cave, and the other ant in a different cave. After an hour went by, the two ants met back up. One ant was covered in brown, sticky, smelly stuff. "Eeew!, What was your cave like" asked the other ant. "It was nice at first, but it soon became really smelly and the walls were all dark and sticky" replied the ant. "So how was your cave ?". "Well" he said, "It was lovely at first, all pink and warm, but then this bald guy started head butting me and then spitting on me."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the hospital, a nurse is asking an old man what is his weight. The man is unsure about his weight so the nurse suggests that it is better if he check his weight now. He goes to the weighing scale and stands on it, then he goes back to the nurse. The nurse let him fill the form by himself. After he fills it, he gives it back to the nurse. When the nurse reads his weight, she is surprised that the man wrote, "82 kg - with glasses," there. The nurse asks the man, "Why must you write ''with glasses'' there? I only ask for your weight. Why don''t you write down your weight without the glasses?" "Because I can''t read the scales and write without my glasses," the man replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Welsh girl called Gwyneth visited Japan recently. There, people had problems pronouncing her name so she became Gwyniss. Everywhere she went, she was greeted with tremendous respect. At a farewell reception, her host said, "We''ve been so excited to have a famous author in our midst." "What am I supposed to have written?" she asked, baffled. "Why, The Gwyniss Book of Records."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In North England: ''mornin'' In West England : How ya doin'' In India : Get up you lazy chit. Don''t you need to go to work ?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy of 6 years old never pays attention to his pant''s zipper...which is always being left open. Because of this his mother often gets angry. One day some of his relatives plan to visit their city, so his mother advised him that whenever she tells him to "close the Eiffel Tower", it means that he has to close his zipper. His relatives arrive, and after some time, the boy asked his aunti, "Aunti, why did you come here?" His aunti answered, "Dear boy, we came here to see the Eiffel Tower." The boy said in great excitement, pointing towards his zipper, "But aunti, the Eiffel Tower is closed." Aunti replied, "My boy, that is the small Eiffel Tower. I came here to see big one." The boy answered politely, "Aunti, then I will have to call my dad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your phone''s network is changing plan. The uglier you are the cheaper your calls. From now on all your calls will be free.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In several places on your tax forms, he''s written, "Give or take a million dollars." Tells you to put all your money into British cattle futures. You notice that his "calculator" is just a broken VCR remote. Insists that there''s no such number as four. He laughed at the Bob Dole background check. Counts family of squirrels living in your yard as dependents. Advises you to save postage by filing your taxes telepathically. Instead of C.P.A. license, he''s got a framed photo of a shirtless Alex Trebek. Demands that you call him the "Una-Countant." He''s got a 1040 Form tattooed on his arm.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Number of physicians in the US = 700,000 Accidental deaths caused by physicians/year =120,000. Accidental deaths/physician = 0.171 Number of gun owners in US = 80,000,000 Number of accidental gun deaths/year = 1500 Accidental deaths/gun owner =.0000188 Conclusion - Doctors are approximately 9000 times more dangerous than gun owners!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a reporter for a suburban newspaper happened upon a construction site with a sign that ominously warned: "DANGER. RADIOACTIVE MATERIALS." Driven by the prospect of a hard-hitting expose, he made a quick call to his editor, then returned to the scene to investigate. The construction supervisor looked unhappy to see him; "I''ll tell you the truth," he said, "but I''m going to ask you not to publish what I say." "This is just like the movies," he thought. The supervisor continued, "There''s nothing radioactive on this site. That sign has been the only way to keep our lumber from being stolen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a teacher if you have an overwhelming urge to nod and say, "Now I understand why your kid is the way he/she is," after meeting the parents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the moron hitting his head against the wall? Because it felt so good when he stopped ! What do you call 12 morons at the bottom of a pool? An air pocket! Why did the moron drive his truck off the bridge? He wanted to check his airbrakes! How many morons does it take to screw in a light bulb? 3...one to hold the bulb, and 2 to turn the chair! Why did the moron open the refrigerator door? He wanted to see the salad dressing! How do you confuse a moron? Put him in a round room and tell him to sit in the corner!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How are a bowling ball and a sorority girl alike? You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter and they''ll always come back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? Gucci sweats and Reeboks. And where was the location of the accident? Approximately milepost 498. And where is milepost 498? Probably between milepost 498 and 500. Did you blow your horn or anything? After the accident? Before the accident. Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it. Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing? Yes. Did the defendant say anything when she got out of the car? Yes, sir. What did she say? What disco am I at?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. I am the Lord thy God and thou shalt have not too many other Gods besides me. 2. Thou shalt make no graven images. This is a major religion, not a shop class. 3. Thou shalt not take the name of thy God in vain without the express written consent of thy God. The name "Thy God" is the sole property of thy God. Any use of the name of thy God without the express writtenconsent of thy God is unauthorized and illegal and shall be punished by thy God. 4. Remember the Sabbath, thy squash game and thy other appointments. 5. Honor thy single parent. 6. Thou shalt not kill a man just to watch him die. 7. Thou shalt not commit adultery and then run for office. 8. Thou shalt not steal. (Note: Not really applicable to car radios.) 9. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor when appearing before Judge Wapner. 10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor''s wife, his servants, his flocks, or his powertools.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking along the beach when he saw bottle. Curious, he picked it up and was wiping the sand off it when out came a genie. "I will grant you three wishes," said the genie. The man couldn''t believe it. "First, I want ten million dollars in a Swiss bank account." Poof! The genie handed the man a piece of paper with his account information on it. "Next, I want to be the smartest man in the world." Poof! The man instantly became smart. "Now, I want to be irresistible to women." Poof! The man was changed into a huge box of chocolates.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill Gates "Notes to self" * Next time my wife says to buy china, she means dishes. * When my son asks for a golf club for his birthday, he means a putter, not a golf course. * When my wife asks for diamonds, she wants ones that will fit on a necklace. * Don''t forget to tip the valet who pushes around your cart at the grocery store. * If someone offers you a drink, don''t ask when we''re eating dinner. * When my daughter asks for an iPod, don''t try to buy her the whole company.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The woman at the supermarket checkout was giving the clerk a hard time. As her audience in the waiting line increased, she became more abusive. Finally, the patient clerk came to a dog''s flea collar. The checker asked the customer if she was aware that the package had been opened. "Of course, I opened it," the woman snapped. "You can''t expect me to get it home and find out it''s the wrong size." A voice from the line spoke for all of us: "Wear it in good health."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was the first day of school and I had gotten a serious scrape on my knee so I asked my friend Jesse to write down notes for me while I went to the nurse. Now, it was the first day of school and there were no notes written on our notebooks and neither of us had written our names on them, so when I came back the next and asked him to give me back my notebooks, he couldn''t tell which was mine and which was his, so we both decided that we''d take either one. Near the end of the school year Jesse got in trouble for stealing my notebook. After he got in trouble (with 3 days detention) I asked him why he stole my notebook. He showed me a small note on the back of what we had thought was his notebook that had been written on the back as a joke saying, "Don''t tell anyone, but this is my notebook," with a picture of me taped next to it. The date on the picture, August 8.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There''s a fella in a fast-food outlet, and he''s just received his order of 7 hot-dogs, 9 Big Macs and 6 large Cokes. The counterhand says, "Would you like a tray?" The customer replies, "Steady on, haven''t I got enough to carry already?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why are cannibals such great improvs? A: They keep feeding off each other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many lead guitarists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. The guitarist holds the bulb and the world revolves around him!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do blondes smile when lightning strikes? A: They think they''re getting their photo taken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother''s Day morning. As the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen, she lay in eager anticipation the lovely breakfast her helpful, caring children were making for her. However, after a good long wait, she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both sitting at the table eating bacon and eggs. "As a surprise for Mother''s Day," one explained, "we decided to cook our own breakfast."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents Ban On Soliciting Dead in Trotwood Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction New Vaccine May Contain Rabies Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies Teacher Strikes Idle Kids Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again Iraqi Head Seeks Arms Farmer Bill Dies in House Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you are in darkness, then pray to God. If you are still in darkness, then go and pay your electricity bill......', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if . . . you have been married three times and you still have the same in-laws, You think TACO BELL is a Mexican Phone Company, Your house still has the "WIDE LOAD" sign on the back, You think Possum is "The Other White Meat", You hooked up with your present girlfriend as a result of a message on the wall of the mens'' room at the Flying J Truck Stop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny was eating breakfast one morning. He got to thinking about things, and asked, "Mommy, why does Daddy have so little hair on his head?" "He thinks a lot, dear," replied his mother, pleased with herself for coming up with a such good answer to her husband''s baldness. "Then why do you have so much hair?" asked Little Johnny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Get to the ledge of the plane. Then, you will do the following: 1.Squat 2.Pray 3.Leap 4.AHHHH! (It''s what you scream on the way down, isn''t it?) 5.Touchdown Yes sir, thats S...P...L...A...T In other words, SPLAT!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lorenzo Dow, an evangelist of the last century, was on a preaching tour when he came to a small town one cold winter''s night. He entered the local general store to get some warmth, and saw the town''s lawyers gathered around the pot-bellied stove, discussing the town''s business. Not one offered to allow Dow into the circle. Dow told the men who he was, and that he had recently had a vision where he had been given a tour of Hell, much like the traveler in Dante''s Inferno. When one of the lawyers asked him what he had seen, he replied, "Very much what I see here: All of the lawyers, gathered in the hottest place."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just when you are finally happy with your life and eveything going on in your life.... You get married and ruin it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, pal! Buddy, friend, mate, amigo! I''ve just heard that I won first prize in a competition! It''s a ten-day holiday for me and five others to Disney World! So I was wondering, if you''re not doing anything next Wednesday, if you could put my garbage can out for collection!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Of course I know what I''m doing! "Trust me." "Say, what happens if I press this?" "Stop being so negative!" "I''m perfectly fine. Really." "Do you smell something burning?" "It''s not that poisonous. Look, if I eat some first will you try it?" "See? Told you I wasn''t afraid of heights!" "You know, bears are really very social creatures. That one over there is smiling at me!" "I think this is what they said to do. At any rate, I guess we''ll see soon!" "No! Why would I need to read some silly instructions?" "Just wondering - what does skull and cross-bones mean? Did this bottle belong to pirates? It did taste kind of odd."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair. Copper is a brown-red color, correct? This is scientific evidence to back up blonde jokes!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hopeless Romantic. Seeking: Filthy Whore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw this sign in a bar a few years ago. A camel can go eight days without a drink - but who the hell wants to be a camel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fool me once shame on you Fool me twice shame on me Fool me thrice you are not nice Fool me four times and I am gonna cap your sorry ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is black and red? An ape going down a hill!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You never know someone until you walk a mile in their shoes. But if you walked a mile in their shoes wouldn''t their feet get cold?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A student was asked to list the 10 Commandments in any order. His answer? "3, 6, 1, 8, 4, 5, 9, 2, 10, 7".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the sixth day God turned to the Gabriel and said: "Today, I am going to create a land called Canada. It will be a land of outstanding natural beauty. It shall have tall, majestic mountains full of mountain goats and eagles. It will have beautiful sparkling lakes bountiful with bass and trout, forests full of elk and moose, high cliffs overlooking sandy beaches with an abundance of sea life, and rivers stocked with salmon." God continued, "I shall make the land rich in oil so as to make the inhabitants prosper, I shall call these inhabitants Canadians, and they shall be known as the most friendly people on the earth." "But Lord," asked Gabriel, "don''t you think you are being too generous to these Canadians?" "Not really," replied God, "just wait and see the neighbors I am going to give them."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You Know You Are in a Redneck Church When... People wonder, when Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish. Opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday. The choir group is known as the "OK Chorale". Four generations of the same family sit together in worship. Baptism is referred to as "branding". People think "rapture" is when you lift something too heavy. The final words of the benediction are, "Y''all come back now, yah hear?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How do you say "Give me liberty or give me death!" in French? A. I give up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris? A. Nobody knows. It''s never been tried.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? A. The French Army.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why was the Chunnel built under the English Channel? A. So the French government could to flee to London.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Did you hear about the new French tanks? A: They have 5 gears...4 in reverse, and one forward gear just in case they''re attacked from behind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why don''t they have fireworks at Euro Disney? A: Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do they have trees in Paris? A: So the Germans can march in the shade instead of the sun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why is good to be French? A: You can surrender at the beginning of the war, and US will win it for you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is the first thing you are taught when joining the French army? A: To say "I surrender" in German', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Jesus not born in France? Because they couldn''t find three wise men or a virgin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about France''s new weapons contracts? They gave one to Ace Hardware to produce 250,000 wood sticks . . . They are still looking for a company to produce 250,000 little white flags.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Where are the brave French soldiers buried? A: There aren''t any so they had to bury some of ours on their soil.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Money is not everything. There''s Mastercard & Visa. One should love animals. They are so tasty. Save water. Shower with your girlfriend. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two. Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life. The wise never marry, and when they marry they become otherwise. Success is a relative term. It brings so many relatives. Love is photogenic. It needs darkness to develop. Children in back seats cause accidents. Accidents in back seats cause children. The more you learn, the more you know. The more you know, the more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know - so why bother to learn?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We''re here on the airport, where a group of people have just arrived after being stranded on an island for more than a year.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This truly happened in an advanced oral English classroom: When the teacher asked the students: "What surprised you most in Tsinghua?" One of them answered, "Well, I''d heard that girls in Tsinghua were terribly ugly before I came here. However, when I arrived here myself, I was surprised to find there''s so many pretty girls, some of them are even sexy......" At that, all girls in the room smiled shyly. Then he continued, "But when the holiday was over, I found all of them had gone!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two babies were born in the same hospital on the same day and ended up in adjacent basinettes in the nursery. Eighty-five years later, by coincidence, each of them is admitted to the same hospital with a "terminal" diagnosis, and they end up in the same two-bed semi-private room. And one of them rolls over and says to the other "So, what did you think?" Thanks to Steven Wright', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Twenty Something - The cost of a sitter for Saturday night. Fancy Restaurant - One that serves cold soup on purpose. College - The four-year period when parents are permitted access to their home telephone. Hors D''oeuvres - A sandwich cut into 20 pieces. Kissing - A means of getting two people so close together that they can''t see anything wrong with each other. Emergency Numbers - Police station, Fire Department and fast food places that deliver.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy was having trouble with his cat. His cat would always scratch the sofa but never the scratching post. One day the guy got an idea; he bought a new couch and replaced the scratching post with the old couch hoping this would solve his problem, but his cat just began scratching the new sofa. Then another idea hit him - he got some clay and got to work. Scratching post - $57 New sofa - $299 Clay - $9 Understanding your cat likes to scratch your face more than he likes to scratch the couch - priceless.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man is driving in his car and hears police sirens behind him. The man knows that with his car he could never out-drive the cop, so, seeing the officer looks fat and out of shape, he opens his car door and makes a run for it. The chase goes on about 20 minutes, with the cop finally catching him. The cop, completely out of breath, tells the man that he will not bring him to the station on one condition - the man, wondering why the cop wasn''t going to turn him in, asked what the condition was. The cop said he wouldn''t turn him in if he would help him lose another 5 pounds!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One evening, a woman received an unexpected call from a ticket clerk at a major airline. He read a list of names and asked if she knew any of the people. "Yes," she said, "they''re all friends of my son. How can I help you?" "The crew was cleaning a plane, and they found this address book," the clerk explained. "After seeing no identification, we looked through the entries and found one we knew could help us. It was under M for Mom."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''re so ugly... that when your mom dropped you off on the curb for school, she got fined for littering.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new intern at Heart & Cross Hospital was looking for an experienced doctor to sign off on him sending a patient to surgery. He saw a nicely tanned man giving orders to someone else so he walked up to him. "Could you sign this for me?" he asked. The man signed the sheet and the intern thanked him and walked away. The next day, the intern walked into the hospital and was informed by the security that he had been fired. The intern asked why, and the security guard told him that he had sent a patient to surgery without having a doctor sign off on it. "Yes, I did, I had him sign it," pointing to the man who he had sign the sheet and who was now mopping the floors. "Him?" asked the security guard. "That''s Jorge the nicely tanned head-janitor."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blonde that was chopping at a tree near the neighbor''s house. Suddenly it fell over and hit the neighbor''s house. The neighbor came out and said, "You just crashed a tree on our house!" The blonde replied, "Well, since it''s an hour house, it''ll be gone in 60 minutes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend said, "Can I hang out with you?" I replied in a choking voice, "I have a spare noose in the closet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man named John was walking back to his house, when a stranger walked up to him and said, "I''ll give you tree beans if you give me your house." But John was drunk, so he thought he said, "If you give me tree beans, I''ll give you my house." So John said, "Yes." And while he was taking out some beans, the stranger gave him three beans and ran in his house. John hollered, "WAIT! YOU HAVE TO FEED THE DOGS OR THEY WILL ATTACK YOU CRAZILY!" But the stranger didn''t hear him fully and replied, "Oh. Don''t feed the dogs? O.k.!" The next day the stranger came out, all torn up and came to John and said, "I want my beans back."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman who was driving down the highway pulled over to the side of the road when the policeman driving behind her turned on his lights and siren. She didn''t have her seat belt on so as soon as she stopped, she quietly slipped it on before the officer got to her window. After talking to her about speeding, the officer said, "I see you are wearing your seat belt. Do you believe in wearing it at all times?" "Yes, I do, officer," she politely replied. "Interesting," said the officer. "Do you always loop it through your steering wheel like that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A 15-year-old boy discovered, having supressed it for years, that he was a homosexual. After gathering courage, he decided to tell his father. He entered the living room where his father sat, reading the newspaper. Reluctantly, he said, "Dad?..." His father looked up. "Yes, son?" "Dad...", the boy stopped for a second, "I''m... I''m gay." The boy looked at his father eagerly. To his surprise, he didn''t even flinch. "Alright, son," he said. "But let me ask you something. Do you participate in gay pride marches?" "No, but.." "Do you," his father interrupted him, "use words such as ''fabulous'' more than ten times a day?" "No..." "Do you shop for clothes more than twice a month and make sure that everynone notices?" the father continued. "No," said the son. "I don''t do any of that." "Well, get out of my sight, boy. You''re not gay. You''re just a fag."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hello, I am Mr. L, as most people call me. I am going to tell you a story that happened to me years ago. Here goes! People were pouring pollution all around they world; strangely, it made certain animals turn gigantic. That happened to a dog one day, it wasn''t pretty. I don''t know why, but it was chasing me around the city. Eventually, I gave up and let it do what it wanted to do to me. It came close to me, lifted its leg and... I think I know why I it did what it did. I was wearing a shirt with a fire hydrant on it, and all the other ones were broken. That''s my story.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once a bird pooped on me, so I threw it back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike and Joe, two buddies, were talking when Joe asked, "Hey Mike, do you have a rake?" "No," Mike replied. Joe questioned, "Well, then will ask your sister to come to my house this weekend to help with something?" Mike, even though he thought this was a strange request, consented, and later talked his sister into it. That weekend, Mike, overcome with curiosity, drove to Joe''s. Joe called out that he and Mike''s sister were in the back yard. After walking around, Mike saw Joe holding Mike''s sister updide down by her toes and pushing and pulling her through Joe''s flower garden. Obviously shocked, Mike yelled in surprise, "What the heck do you think you are doing?" Calmly Joe answered, "A gardening magazine said to use a rake to even out the soil. Neither of us had one, but they said I could also use a hoe."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael Vick shouldn''t go to jail for dog fighting. "Why? It''s a crime." "Well, it''s one thing to fight your friends or someone at a bar, but it''s your dog. You should be able to fight him if he gets in your face." "What?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I started a new band called The Chimes "What kind of band?" "Acapella Ska" "What do you play?" "Drums"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you were attacked by giant mutants, what would you do? Most people would run. Some would hide, and the video recorders would record it and put it on television. Last week, humans won a war against giant vicious demons called, "Razzoopis". Razzoopis are Godzilla-sized monsters that have rock hard bodies, and breath fire. No one knows why it came, or how it was defeated, but the other humans had a feeling that the humans gave back its baby.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two businessmen were taking a break while setting up their soon-to-open store''s shelving units. There they sat, in the middle of nothing but empty shelves. One said, "I bet any minute now some smart aleck will stick his head in the door and ask what we''re selling." Within minutes, a man did just that, "Hey, boys, whacha sellin''?" One businessmen responded sarcastically, "We''re selling assholes." Without missing a beat, the man rejoined, "Looks like business is good; ya only got two left!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Kentucky Fried was on the side he was leaving from.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a quirky breed of dinosaur called an "Adoptosaurus". Adoptosauruses laid eggs and often times forgot where they laid them or whose eggs were who''s. Basically, they "adopted" the eggs they found and claimed them as their own. Adoptosauruses didn''t eat meat because it wasn''t apart of their dino-religion. They thought eating meat made dinosaurs fat and have wrinkly skin. Adoptosauruses ate flowers because they thought it made them smell good. They thought they were the best of all the dinosaurs. Maybe they went extinct so fast because their babies got hungry and ate each other, or the T-rexes found them and ate them, or maybe they were just stupid dinosaurs that adopted their own eggs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A T Rex named Farrell asked his mother if he could dress up in a tutu. His mother replied, "No! Boys don''t wear tutus and dance on their tippie-toes!" Farrell yelled, "But mom!" and told his father. His father said, "Son, I''m a balerina and I dance in a tutu." Then the mother fainted and fell on the floor. So father and son danced around the unconscious mother in tutus. They had so much fun, and later had cookies and tea as a treat - and they used the mother as a table.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy named John was moving away somewhere far from his the home he is already in. But he couldn''t bring the loved kitten he found. So he decided to sneak it. He stuffed the cat in a cardboard box without any holes. Suddenly his mother came up. He quickly taped it shut and put it on the corner of his bed. "John, did I hear a cat meow?" "No mother." She left. So then John went "Whew!" and he sat on the opposite corner of the bed. It forced the box upwards and out the window. The cat popped out and had it hands up, like on a roller coaster, and the same with its feet. It stared right at John and made a quiet meow. It fell in the kiddie pool. John said, "Well no wonder they call it the Kitty pool!" His mom came in and said, "You can bring the cat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when two blonds fight? A Stupid Fight.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the parasite cross the road? It hopped on the chicken!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than roses on your piano?? Tulips on your organ! (two-lips)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Post rejected Braingle brain teasers here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I once heard a cretin tell his friend that all cretins are liars! Did he lie though?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a gift for Christmas, a wealthy family gives its children seventeen computer games. The youngest child gets one ninth of the games, the middle child gets one third of the games and the oldest child gets one half of the games. How are the games divided up, remembering you cannot have part of a computer game? The family are a little stuck until they borrow a game from their neighbours. This allows: one ninth of 18 is 2, one third of 18 is 6 and one half of 18 is 9. Now, this adds to 2 + 6 + 9 = 17, leaving the spare game to give back to their neighbour!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer goes in to the cell where his client is being held. "Okay, I''ve some bad news, and some good news." "Right, what''s the bad news?" "It''s DEFINITELY your blood at the scene of the crime." "So what''s the good news?" "Your cholesterol is way down!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy was working on circumferences for homework when his mother came in and said, "Do you want some pie?" The boy replied, "Sure." So the mother was saying "3.141592..." over and over and then said, "Want some ratio?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A grandfather bought a hobby-horse by mail order as a Christmas present for his granddaughter. The toy arrived in 189 pieces. The instructions said that it could be put together in an hour; however, it took the old man two days to assemble the toy. Finally, when it was all put together, he wrote a check, cut it into 189 pieces and mailed it to the company.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Jimmy, use the word "handsome" in a sentence. Jimmy: Handsome gum over will ya? Teacher: No, no, that''s not right. You have one more chance. Use the word "gladiator" in a sentence. Jimmy: A monster ate my sister and I''m gladiator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy and his missus are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor''s dog barking. It had been barking for hours and hours. Suddenly, Paddy jumps out of bed and says, "I''ve had enough of this," and goes downstairs. Paddy finally comes back up to bed and his wife says, "The dog is still barking. What have you been doing?" Paddy says, "I''ve put their dog in our yard - now we''ll see how THEY like it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I Hate you you hate me barney gave *****(1) H.I.V so we kicked them in the balls and shot her in the head now that *****(2) bitch is dead anii stars ***** men add someones nae or add an adjective to fit i.e - *****(1)fred *****(2)ugly', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher stood at the front of the room. "Does anybody know what this Monday is?" About half of the students raised their hands. The teacher pointed to one of them. "It''s Columbus Day!" he crowed. The teacher smiled. "It is. Does anybody know why we celebrate it?" This time, only one student raised her hand. "It''s the day the Indians discovered Columbus!" How very true indeed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve heard about the new hair salon which opened up right across the street from the old established hair cutters'' place, haven''t you? They put up a big old sign, "WE GIVE SEVEN DOLLAR HAIR CUTS!" Not to be outdone, the old shop put out their own sign: "WE FIX SEVEN DOLLAR HAIR CUTS"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe in making the world safe for our children. But not our children''s children, because I don''t think children should be having sex.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a man who was getting ready to be hanged by the politicians of Aaronztown City. The only way he could ignore death was to convince the mayor to make the politicians change their mind. So he did. "Hello Mayor Green, I am here to discuss important matter." "Okay. Very well. Do you want to make any comments before we begin?" "Yes. Do you mind if I examine the things around here before we begin?" "Yes." Darn. Okay, my first question. Do you mind if I do not get hung by the politicians?" "Yes." But, I have a family, a long life ahead of me, and lots of friends. Are you sure you mind?" Yes." The man growled furiously. "Do you mind if I don''t kill you before I get hung?" "Yes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do Hondas and Hyundais have standard rear-window defoggers? A: So your hands don''t get cold when you''re pushing them. Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a Porcupine? A: With a Porsche, the pricks are on the inside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you call people who use condoms? A: Parents.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gregory was a boy who was always beaten up by a bully who everyone called: "The Demon". Everyday, "The Demon" would punch Gregory in the stomach without any warning. And Gregory always got a stomachache. Now, Gregory wasn''t very smart. He often confused things with other things and ended up in trouble. But Gregory didn''t know. And Gregory had 7-9 fears and takes them seriously. He has a fear of telling a teacher on someone, so that''s a reason why he''s letting The Demon punch him. The doctor told him that if he continued to be punched, that he would get a stomach bruise - which wasn''t good at all. So, Gregory and his father were having a father-to-son conversation about this problem. "Son, why are you letting ''The Demon'' punch you everyday?" "I dunno dad." "Well, you can''t just let him punch you in the stomach." "Really, dad?" "Yes, really." The next day, Gregory came home with stomach, and rib pains.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fuck hubluza!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Wocka user has average joke comedy 2.5, but he doesn''t get the smiley. Why can it happen? Because his average joke comedy is between 2.495 and 2.5, which is rounded up to 2.5.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sam Krypton was a boy who hated meatloaf, but he knew that every time he didn''t eat it, he lost a chance for ice cream, his favorite thing to eat. So today, he decided to eat it, and try and forget about the taste. He ate it up, and said, "THIS MEATLOAF WAS DELICIOUS!" His mother was pleased, and gave him ice cream. The next week, his mother gave him a large serving of meatloaf, expecting him to eat it all up. Sam forgot about what he did last week. He was looking out the window - then, a moment later, he said, "Eww! What smells?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newspaper columnist was found guilty and fined for calling a countess a cow. When the trial ended and the man paid his fine, he asked the judge, since it was now clear he couldn''t call a countess a cow, could he call a cow a countess? The judge said it was all right to do so. Whereupon the newspaperman turned to the countess in the courtroom, bowed elaborately, and said, "How do you do, Countess?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so fat that when she entered the elevator and pressed the ''up'' button, the elevator went down! "Oh yeah? Yo Momma is so fat that she can''t even fit in the elevator!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('#1 At a Gift shop Counter ''"My One and only" Valentine cards, Is now available in Multi-packs!!'' #2 At a Washing Machine in a Washers ''When Finished, Please Remove Pants'' #3 At a Handdryer in a Toilet ''Warning: Please do not operate this machine with wet hands!'' #4 At a Highway beside a river ''Warning: Road closed due to flood if you don''t see this sign!'' #5 At a Repair Shop Sign at door: ''We repair anything!'' Sign at bell: ''Sorry, Bell broken."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple of weeks after hearing a sermon on Psalms 51:2-4 (knowing my own hidden secrets) and Psalm 52:3-4 (lies and deceit), a man wrote the following letter to the IRS: "I have been unable to sleep, knowing that I have cheated on my income tax. I understated my taxable income, and have enclosed a check for $150. If I still can''t sleep, I will send the rest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman, all talking about their teenage daughters. The Englishman said - "I walked into my daughter''s room and saw a razor on the floor. I didn''t know she was old enough to shave." The Irishman said - "That''s nothing; I walked into my daughter''s room and saw a tampax. I didn''t know she was old enough to start her periods." The Scottsman said - "Well, I walked into her room and saw a condom lying on the floor - I didn''t know she had grown a cock!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Giraffe Giraffe who? Giraffaggot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl was sat in science, when she wet herself. She goes to her teacher and says "I''ve wet myself". The teacher asks "Why didn''t you put your hand up?" She replies "I did, but it just ran down my hand!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so smelly that when she entered a pig sty, all the pigs had to evacuate...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... The idea for the Budweiser frogs came from listening to you and your friends trying to read the label on the bottle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You can remember every NASCAR driver and their car number but can''t remember how old your children are.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You are having marital problems because your wife never lets you win at arm wrestling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My friend Doug pointed up at a bird circling overhead and said, "Look, it''s an eagle!" "That doesn''t look like an eagle," I said. "Well of course not," he shot back amazingly quickly. "It''s travelling incognito. Haven''t you ever heard that "Eagles are Masters of De Skys?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you have every episode of Hee-Haw on tape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you carried a fishing pole into Sea World.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...a seven course meal is a bucket of KFC and a sixpack.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three primary colors.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('... you have an above-ground pool and you fish in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you''ve ever had to have a wrecker pull your car out of a pothole in your driveway.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just "misunderstood".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...your screen door has no screen.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...you cut the grass and find a Car.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('...if you refer to the fifth grade as, "your senior year".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You have ever had to get up quickly in the morning in order to let the goat out before she dropped raisins on the kitchen floor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You think mud rasslin'' should be an Olympic sport.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... Your gene pool doesn''t have a "deep end."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You think the Gettysburg Address is where Lincoln lived.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... The lake has to be restocked after you take a bath.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You''re 42 and still have clowns come to your birthday party.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You might be a redneck if... You can talk for more than 20 minutes on the difference between squirrel and rabbit stew.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My grandfather invented the rear-view mirror. Made millions - hasn''t looked back since!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you can touch it and you can see it, it''s REAL. If you can touch it but you can''t see it, it''s TRANSPARENT. If you can''t touch it but you can see it, it''s VIRTUAL. If you can''t touch it and you can''t see it, it''s GONE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, you! Pull over! shouted the traffic cop. The lady complied, and the judge next day fined her twenty-five dollars for speeding. She went home in great anxiety lest her husband, who always examined her checkbook, should learn of the incident. Then inspiration struck and she marked the check stub, "One pullover, $25."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blond put an advert in the library to start a marching band. 20 other blonds saw this advert and signed up. At their first destination they played "Oh, when the saints". At their second destination they played the same song. At their third destination they played the same song yet again! When they arrived at their fourth destination a member of the crowd butted in and kicked one of the drummers. The blond that started the group said, "Why did you do that?" The guy replied "Well, you''ve killed all of the people in the world because your band is rubbish but loud, so pretty much all the people are saints and they''re marching into heaven, so stop playing!" The blond replied "We were playing? I thought we were being serious about this band!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bubba listened to the preacher at the revival and when the preacher asked those with needs to come forward for prayer, Bubba got in line. When it was his turn, the preacher asked, "What do you want me to pray about?" Bubba said, "Pray for my hearing, preacher." The preacher put one hand over Bubba''s ear and his other hand on top of Bubba''s head and prayed a while. Then he removed his hands and asked, "Bubba, now how is your hearing?" Bubba answered, "I don''t know, preacher. It''s next Wednesday at the Baton Rouge courthouse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some useless inventions: 1) A waterproof teabag 2) A swimsuit store in the North Pole 3) Sugar free, fat free, taste free chocolate 4) A parachute that opens on impact 5) An ejector seat in a helicopter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is like the internet; she''s worldwide.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s 2nd grade teacher was quizzing them on the alphabet. "Johnny," she says, "what comes after ''O''?" Johnny says, "Yeah!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The relatives of the family''s rich dowager gathered for the reading of her will after her long-awaited death. "Being of sound mind," read the lawyer, "I spent every last cent before I died."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('News just in - the drummer tripped over the cymbals, and hit his head. The hospital spokesperson said, "He''ll be all right in a couple of days; he''s just suffering from percussion."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The university''s gymnasium hallway displayed basketball team pictures from the past forty years. In every photo, one player, sitting front row center, held a basketball identifying the year of the team: 94-95, 95-96, 96-97, 97-98, etc. One day, a senior on the basketball team noticed a cute, blonde freshman cheerleader staring curiously at the photos. The senior, hoping to score a few points off the court, commented about the team''s history. Impressed, the cute, blonde freshman cheerleader said: "Isn''t it amazing how the teams always won by just one point?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a couple was in their room and the woman had just performed amazing oral on her man. He asked her where she had learned how to do it like that. She than said to him, "It took some practice but your dad finally taught me how to do it right."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Person A: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person B: Is this a trick question?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Why are little children sweet-tooths? They keep crying when they can''t have candy. 2. Why are little children kindergarteners? Um... they''re still learning basic skills, are they not? 3. Why are little children such blanket-connected people? They have read too many Peanut strips and can''t resist but be Linus. 4. Why are little children people who like to joke around? They hear their dad''s joke with them too often.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign outside a watch-maker''s shop; Watch batteries fitted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sign outside a Chinese restaurant: Try our curries, you''ll never get better.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde is taking an interview, and the examiner is asking some general questions. "What is the boiling temperature of water?" "I am not sure." "Miss, either you know it or you don''t know it." "No, I am still not sure." "The boiling temperature of water is 100 degrees!" "Ok, so it''s the right angle that boils at 90 degrees?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I found this attached to a halloween scythe: BE SURE HEAD IS ATTACHED BEFORE USE.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde was driving along in her car one day, when she noticed a man at the side of the road, eating grass. She pulled over and asked him "Why are you eating the grass?" The man replied, "I''m too poor to afford any food, so I have to eat the grass to stay alive." The blonde said to him, "Don''t worry, you can come back to my house and I''ll give you food." The man, overjoyed, asked the blonde, "But why are you helping me?" She replied, "Well, I like cows." The man, who didn''t think he''d heard her properly, repeated the question. "Why do you want to help me?" She said "Because cows eat grass, so you must be a cow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not being rascist, this actually happened to me. I was driving my car late at night along a fairly busy road, when I came across a very busy junction. Coming towards me, on the wrong side of the road, with no lights on except for the left indicator, was an Asian lady in her 4x4. I stopped, and started to back up, and she stopped at the junction as well, and turned right down another road (with her left indicator still on), and also still on the wrong side.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s green and runs round the garden? The hedge!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m very sorry sir, but I don''t have my homework with me- I left my bag on the bus. "Well done! A+"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dear son, Good luck with your exams tomorrow. I always think that it''s best to stay up partying all of the night before an exam. Exam rooms are always a good place to catch up on sleep, because they''re silent, and there''s nothing to do in them anyway. Love, Dad', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a new baby cousin named Caroline. She has a big brother named Sam (he just turned 2) and 2 big sisters named Elena and Erica. Well, my aunt was away with her three daughters. It was just my uncle and Sam at home. My uncle and Sam were playing on the floor. My uncle had to fart, but he tried to let it out quietly, but it came out a little louder than he had expected. Then Sam perks up and says "Baby Caroline?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat you can slap her ass all day and not slap the same place twice!.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DON''T CHEAT! Draw a pig. Yes, that''s right. On a blank piece of paper, draw a pig, then scroll down and read the interpretation of your pig! Draw your pig first! And don''t look at the next part until you are done! It won''t be fun if you look first. Now if you''re done...start to scroll down..... YOU''RE CHEATING! DRAW THE DAMN PIG!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We Haven''t Had Any A store manager overheard a clerk saying to a customer, "No, ma''am, we haven''t had any for some weeks now, and it doesn''t look as if we''ll be getting any soon." Alarmed, the manager rushed over to the customer who was walking out the door and said, "That isn''t true, ma''am. Of course, we''ll have some soon. In fact, we placed an order for it a couple of weeks ago." The manager then drew the clerk aside and growled, "Never, never, never, never say we don''t have something. If we don''t have it, say we ordered it and it''s on its way. "Now, what was it she wanted?" The clerk answered, "Snow."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wouldn''t have believed this unless I seen it with my own eyes. I was walking down a street in the city I live in and noticed a store was going out of business. In the window was a huge sign "GOING OUT OF BUSINESS SALE", directly below that sign was another sign that said "NOW HIRING!" Talk about no job security!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know ''that look'' women get when they want sex? Me neither. ~ Steve Martin "Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don''t have a good partner, you''d better have a good hand." ~ Woody Allen "Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night." ~ Rodney Dangerfield "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place." ~ Billy Crystal "I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy." ~ Tom Clancy "Ah yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man''s genitals through his wallet." ~ Robin Williams "See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time." ~ Robin Williams', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who was the most complaining woman in the bible? Mary, because she got on Joseph''s ass and rode it all the way to Bethlehem.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some men will got to extraordinary lengths to prove how macho they are. Frenchman Pierre Pumpille recently shunted a stationary car two feet by headbutting it. "Women thought I was a god," he explained from his hospital bed. Deity or not, however, Pumpille is a veritable girl''s blouse compared to Polish farmer Krystof Azninski, who staked a strong claim to being Europe''s most macho man by cutting off his own head in 1995. Azninski, 30, had been drinking with friends when it was suggested they strip naked and play some "men''s games". Initially they hit each other over the head with frozen turnips, but then one man upped the ante by seizing a chainsaw and cutting off the end of his foot. Not to be outdone, Azninski grabbed the saw and, shouting "Watch this then," he swung at his own head and chopped it off. "It''s funny," said one companion, "when he was young he put on his sister''s underwear. But he died like a man."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Mexican jail guard died from an excess of zeal while supervising an inmate''s conjugal visit. Raul Zarate Diaz was closely watching his charge from the roof of the prison when he tripped over an air vent, crashed through the skylight, and fell 23 feet to land beside the bed where the inmate and his wife were, against all odds, enjoying an intimate moment. The interrupted prisoner, offended by the intrusion, attempted to start a riot, but was squelched by prison security. Prisoners in the Tapachula facility reported that Diaz was in the habit of prowling the prison roof during conjugal visits, in search of prisoners to supervise. Local law enforcement reported that the guard was clutching a pornographic magazine, which was retained as evidence, and binoculars, whose sentimental value led to them being given back to the family of the deceased.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teenage guitarist got so carried away while bouncing up and down on his bed mimicking a rock star that he flew out of a third floor window to his death, a Singapore newspaper reported yesterday. The Straits Times said Li Xiao Meng, a 16-year-old from China who was studying at Singapore''s Hua Business School, was a keen musician who liked to jump up and down while playing his guitar in his hostel room. "But on November 17 he took things a bit too far," the newspaper said, reporting on a coroner''s court findings. Ruling death by misadventure, the court said evidence "points to the deceased unintentionally falling out of the window to his death when he was hyped up with exhilaration, jumping up and down on the bed placed against an open window while mimicking a rock guitarist"." Normally the windows were locked, the newspaper said, but students sometimes forced them open so they could smoke, something prohibited by the hostel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Eric A. Barcia, a 22-year-old Reston, VA resident, was found dead yesterday after he used bungee cords to jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle, police said. The fast food worker taped a number of bungee cords together and strapped one end around his foot. Barcia had the foresight to anchor the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, and he even remembered to measure the length of the bungee cords to make sure that they were a few feet short of the 70 foot drop. He proceeded to fall headfirst from the trestle, and hit the pavement 70 feet below several seconds later. Fairfax County police said "The stretched length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do call a crying alien baby? An Unidentifyed Crying Object!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What part of music is the part you''d better not try to sing? Refrain!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a musician with real high morals? Virtuoso.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who composed the Unfinished Symphony? Sherbet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the principal singer of nineteenth century opera called? Pre-Madonna!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fill in the blank: The person who spends all of today bragging about what he is going to accomplish tomorrow probably did the very same thing _________. Yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? U P Broken up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? Weather Cast Cast Cast Cast Weather forecast!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does this represent? W A T E R Waterfall!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? A R M S Open arms!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Les chres lchrent les chairs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CONGRATULATIONS! WHY? BECAUSE YOU ARE ONE OF THE VERY VERY VERY FEW WHO READ THE README FILE! But because the other, huge percentage do NOT, we moved the actual contents of this file into IGNOREME file because the chances for most of the people to read IGNOREME are at least the chances to read README (more than that, we believe they are really much higher). So now, go read IGNOREME with the actual contents what you would have expected here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do Chinese eat dogs? Yes. And cats. Especially on our "Thanks receiving" day. Besides, turkeys are our favorite pets. In China only the most uneducated eat turkeys. China is becoming strong. Does your government want to take over the world? Yes, absolutely. As soon as we become powerful, we will invade Iraq and Afghanistan. Why doesn''t your government give Tibet back to its monks? Because the monks want to help the Seminoles take back Florida. Are the products made in China very cheap? Yes. Were we using slaves, the price would be even cheaper. Why you are the only kid in your family? Because my parents don''t fuck with everybody. You have 1.4 billion people. Now what do you want to do with it? Find a new planet. Kill the native people there, and move in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Flood is over and the ark has landed. Noah lets all the animals out and says, "Go forth and multiply." A few months later, Noah decides to take a stroll and see how the animals are doing. Everywhere he looks he finds baby animals. Everyone is doing fine except for one pair of little snakes. "What''s the problem?" says Noah. "Cut down some trees and let us live there", say the snakes. Noah follows their advice. Several more weeks pass. Noah checks on the snakes again. Lots of little snakes, everybody is happy. Noah asks, "Want to tell me how the trees helped?" "Certainly", say the snakes. "We''re adders, so we need logs to multiply."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why doesn''t glue stick to the bottle?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Does a clean house indicate that there is a broken computer in it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that''s falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you never hear father-in-law jokes?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first you don''t succeed, shouldn''t you try doing it like your wife/girlfriend told you to do it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And my FAVORITE...... The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends, if they''re okay, then it''s you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple, hosting a dinner party, were interrupted when the maid called the hostess to the kitchen. "Ma''am, the cat climbed up on the kitchen counter and ate the middle of the salmon." Light on her feet, the hostess told her to replace the missing portion with canned salmon, then returned to her guests. As everyone enjoyed the fish, the maid summoned the hostess into the kitchen again. "Ma''am, the cat is dead!" The frightened hostess felt obliged to inform her guests and suggested everyone go to the hospital together to get their stomachs pumped. Returning home after their long, expensive, and embarrassing ordeal, she asked the maid where she had put the cat. "Nowhere, Ma''am. It''s still out in the street where the car hit it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jesus is sitting down one day and is visioning the high rate of drug consumption on earth in later years. He thought it was a bit hypocritical of him to condemn them without first trying them himself, so he sent his apostles out to find what drugs they could. The secret operation is effected and two days later the commissioned Jesus, waiting at the door, hears a knock: "Who is it?" "It''s Paul" Jesus opens the door. "What did you bring Paul?" "Hashish from Morocco" another knock ... "Who is it?" "It''s Mark" Jesus opens the door. "What did you bring Mark?" "Marijuana from Colombia" another knock ... "Who is it?" "It''s Matthew" Jesus opens the door. "What did you bring Matthew ?" "Cocaine from Bolivia" This continues for a while until finally there''s a 12th knock on the door"Who is it?" "It''s Judas" Jesus opens the door. "What did you bring Judas?" "FBI!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey Sean, I''ve got a job lined up for you, can you turn up tomorrow, about tenish? "Tennish? I don''t even have a racket"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young Alabama man goes to a drug store and says to the pharmacist: "I got a hot date tonight, an'' I need me some pertection. How much is a pack a'' them thar rubbers gonna cost me?" The pharmacist responds: "A three-pack of condoms is $4.99 with tax." "TACKS!" the shocked redneck says. "Gawd a'' mighty, don''t they stay on by themselves?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just after Creation the Lord noticed that the original male-female pair of snakes were not reproducing. He summoned them and said, "I thought I told everyone to go forth and multiply?" The snakes replied, "Yes Lord, but we cannot." The Lord was annoyed and thundered, "and why not?" to which the snakes answered, "You see, Lord, you made us Adders." We could have stopped here (small groan), but actually the Lord got real sore and threatened, "I don''t give a shit, just go forth and multiply!" A week later when the Lord visited, Lo! - was he pleased. Adders here, adders there, adders everywhere. He called for the original pair. "Congratulations," he said, and then not without some bafflement inquired, "how did you do it?" The ingenious pair replied, "It was simple, Lord. We used logarithms." Alternative ending, "Fibonacci coached us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Susan () Vic () Vic: Finger the baby''s ass, if he kicks, he''ll be a sorcer, if he screams, he''ll be a singer, if he laughs, he''ll be a homo. Susan:()What about a girl? Vic: We finger them when they over 18. ...... ....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Let''s test your IQ............. 1. man ----------- board Ans. man overboard 2. stand ----------- i I understand ok?....get the drift? Let''s try a few now & see how you fare. 3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/ Reading between the lines 4. r road a d Crossroad 5. cycle cycle cycle Tricycle 6. t o w n Downtown 7. le / / vel Split level 8 . 0 ------------ M.D. Ph.D. Two degrees below zero 9. knee ------------ light Neon light (knee-on light) 10. ii ii ----------- O O Circles under the eyes 11. dice dice Paradise 12. t o u c h Touchdown 13. ground --------------- feet feet feet feet feet feet Six feet underground 14. he''s / himself He''s by himself 15. ecnalg Backward glance 16. death / life Life after death 17 THINK Think big! And the last one is fun............ 18 ababaaabbbbaaaabbbbababaabbaaabbbb.... Long time no ''c''(see)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a very long line that goes on and on and just when you think it is over it starts again going on and on but you know it cannot keep on forever until it starts repeating itself about being a very long line that goes on and on and just when you think it is over it starts repeating itself about not keeping going on and on forever but you know it was a very long line.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young air force officer had a very beautiful wife. Early each morning he left his house and went to the airport, and an hour later his wife always left the house too, with a big white towel, and went for a walk on the beach. Her husband always flew over every morning, and when she saw his aeroplane, she held the white towel high above her head. When her husband saw it, he made either the left wing or the right wing of his aeroplane go down. The left wing meant, ''I will be busy tonight and won''t be home,'' the right wing meant, ''In eight hours I will be holding you in my arms.'' One morning he flew over with eight other aeroplanes, and his left wing went down. Before his wife had time to feel sad about this, all the other aeroplanes flew over, and each one of them turned its right wing down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 ladies were on a flight. Suddenly the pilot informed them that there was a technical problem and the plane was going to crash into the sea. A Chinese lady quickly took her cosmetics set out and started to doll herself up. A Malay lady beside her questioned her on her actions. The Chinese lady replied that if she looked beautiful, the guys coming to rescue survivors would usually save the pretty ladies first. On hearing this, the Malay lady started to put on all her jewellery. An Indian woman sitting beside the Malay lady was curious and questioned her. The Malay lady said that the rescuers would save her because she would easily be identified by the glitter of her jewels. The Indian woman then started taking her clothes off. Both the Chinese and Malay ladies were shocked and questioned her. The Indian woman then replied that rescue teams do not usually look for survivors. They usually look for the "Black Box" first!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The running water in Singapore can be drunk directly. So when I get thirsty, I go to the toilet and drink. But how to make a bowl of instant noodle? A girl thinks: "Since the running water can be drunk directly, the water from electric bathing machine also can!" So she use the water from bathing machine to make instant noodle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between man and life? Life is always hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: The weather here is too bad. The winter is too cold, and the summer is too hot. Fortunately, I have an air condition in my room. Oh, do you have air condition in your dorm? Students: (laughing) No way. Teacher: At least you can use a fan, can''t you? Students: (upset) No way! The electricity is cut off at 11 o''clock. Teacher: (puzzled) No air condition, no fan, six people in such a small room, and the weather is so hot, how can you sleep? Students: We don''t sleep. Teacher: (surprised) Oh, if you don''t sleep, how can you study? Students: We don''t study, either. Teacher: ...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was late in the evening and I was studying in the university library''s reading room. It was in the middle of final exams, so the library was a hectic place with students milling around everywhere. I was sitting at my desk with my pile of books and felt the need for a nap before I continued with my work. I wasn''t asleep long before I was awakened by laughter. To my surprise, everyone who was laughing was also looking at me. I looked around the room, silently pleading for answers, when someone next to me leaned over and whispered, "You were farting in your sleep."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had been seeing David for a couple of months; he and I both had children from previous marriages. My daughter Amanda has a slight learning disability and is very outspoken. She just tells it like it is and if you don''t like it ... oh well. We were all at David''s house, sitting on the porch, talking about all the weird things our children do. Not to be outdone, Amanda says, "Oh, you say *we* are weird? Well, Mom, who chased me around the house the other night with her teeth out?" See, I had planned to tell David that I had false teeth, but I hadn''t gotten around to it yet. After I turned 40 shades of red, he looked at me and smiled. "Don''t worry," he said, "I still love you." Still, I felt really bad because he''d said the first thing he noticed about me was my beautiful smile!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gentleman came into work one day and he and I felt one of those instant and mutual attractions to one another. He gave me his card and told me to call him. Well, it just so happened that his card had his home address on it, so I thought I would just check out his place to scope out the merchandise, so to speak. Driving down his street, I slowed down to a near-crawl and hung my head out the window, looking for his house number. The house number proved to be irrelevant, though, when I looked up and saw him standing on his porch, waving at me! There I was with my head hanging out and my mouth wide open, looking like some kind of stalker! Needless to say, I did not wave back to him (I floored the gas pedal instead!) and I never called him. What would I have said?!?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy goes to a girl''s house for the first time and she shows him into the living room. She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to make them a few drinks. As he''s standing there alone, he notices a cute little vase on the mantel. He picks it up and as he''s looking at it, she walks back in. He says, "What''s this?" She says, "Oh, that. My father''s ashes are in there..." He turns beet red in embarrassment for having brought up such a tender subject and says, "Geez, oh, er...I..." She says, "Yeah, he''s too lazy to go to the kitchen to get an ashtray."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple preparing for a religious conversion meets with the orthodox rabbi for their final session. The rabbi asks if they have any final questions. The man asks, "Is it true that men and women don''t dance together?" "Yes," says the rabbi, "For modesty reasons, men and women dance separately." "So I can''t dance with my own wife?" "No." "Well, okay," says the man, "but what about sex?" "Fine," says the rabbi. "A mitzvah within the marriage!" "What about different positions?" the man asks. "No problem," says the rabbi. "Woman on top?" the man asks. "Why not?" replies the rabbi. "How about doggie-style?" "Of course!" "Well, what about standing up?" "NO!" says the rabbi, "It could lead to dancing!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('* Perfume saleslady to customer: "Just a word of advice. Don''t put this stuff on if you''re not really serious about the guy." * Contrary to popular belief, used-car salesmen are fairly honest with their customers. It''s usually a condition of their parole. * A really great salesman is one who can actually make his wife feel sorry for the girl who lost her panties and bra in his car. * Only a salesman can make a customer think he is really absorbed by a customer''s needs and at the same time calculate how much of a commission he can make out of the deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman called an auto parts store and asked for a 28-ounce water pump. "What?" asked the confused parts guy. She said, "My husband says he needs a 28-ounce water pump." "A 28-ounce water pump? What kind of car does it fit?" asked the parts guy. "A Datsun," replied the woman. As the parts guy wrote down her request, a light went on in his head. "Oh, yes, ma''am. We''ve got 28-ounce water pumps," he said. "We also have 24-ounce and 26-ounce pumps." "Finally," she said. "You''re the first place I''ve called that knew what I was talking about." "Yes ma''am," said parts guy, smiling, as he jotted down "Datsun 280Z water pump..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiter, this lobster has only one claw. I''m sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight. Well, bring me the winner then.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Waiter, this plate is wet. That''s your soup, sir.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Look here, waiter! How long must I wait for that half-duck I ordered? Until somebody orders the other half. We can''t go out and kill half a duck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Customer: I see you have gravy on your menu today. Waiter: Yes, sir. What would you like to have? Customer: A clean menu!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mother: Did you eat all the cookies. Tom? Tom: I didn''t touch one. Mother: That''s strange. There''s only one left. Tom: That''s the one I didn''t touch.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife: One more word, and I will go back to my mother! Husband: Taxi!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My 12-year-old sister was filling out an application form for a foreign language course. Suddenly she stopped, a small frown on her forehead. A moment later, she wrote something down. Glancing over her shoulder, I saw that the question she had paused at was: "Mother tongue." On the blank space beside it she had written, "Pink."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is zero a 1-digit number or a 0-digit number, or neither? You may think that 0 is a 1-digit number. However, this will make 00 a 2-digit number, 000 a 3-digit number, and so on. Leading zeros do not count towards the digits, and 0 itself is a leading zero. If you think that 0 is a 0-digit number, you''re still wrong. 100 is a 3-digit number, 10 is a 2-digit number, 1 is a 1-digit number, and therefore, .1 is a 0-digit number, .01 is a -1-digit number, and so on. Therefore, the number of digits of a real number x is 1+int(lgx). Since lg0 is meaningless, the number of digits of 0 can''t be defined.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does this represent? WRIST WRIST Tourists! (two wrists)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? DOG THE The underdog!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? SMOKE G Go up in smoke!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? H I L L Downhill!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? TTTTTTTTTT Tent.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? LINE = End of the Line!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('man having problems with premature ejaculation, went to the doctor to see what to do about it.doctor said try startling your self if you feel the urge to ejaculate.on the way home he buys a starter pistol. the guy excited to try the new idea, went home and was suprised to find his wife in the bed.after few minutes of fore play they were in the 69 position he was going to ejaculate so he fires the gun. his wife shits on his face bites 3 inchs off his dick and he still ejaculates prematurly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama so short that you can see her feet on the driver license. Yo mama so ugly that when she was born the doctor slap her parents. Yo mama so dumb that she sat on the tv and watches her wheelchair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pat and Mick landed themselves a job at a saw mill. Just before morning tea Pat yelled: "Mick! I lost my finger!" "Have you now?" says Mick. "And how did you do it?" "I just touched this big spinning thing here like this...Damn! There goes another one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a mad scientist (a mad ...social... scientist) who kidnapped three colleagues, an engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician, and locked each of them in separate cells with plenty of canned food and water - but no can opener. A month later, returning, the mad scientist went to the engineer''s cell and found it long empty. The engineer had constructed a can opener from pocket trash, used aluminum shavings and dried sugar to make an explosive, and escaped. The physicist had worked out the angle necessary to knock the lids off the tin cans by throwing them against the wall. She was developing a good pitching arm and a new quantum theory. The mathematician had stacked the unopened cans into a surprising solution to the kissing problem; his dessicated corpse was propped calmly against a wall, and this was inscribed on the floor in blood: Theorem: If I can''t open these cans, I''ll die. Proof: assume the opposite...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('President Clinton had heard of all the starving people in Somalia, and wanted to get a look for himself. He ordered his aides to prepare Air Force One. On the plane, the president looked down with his binoculars, and said "My God! Look at them! Skinny, starving - where are our troops?" An aide chimed in: "Er, Mr. President... that''s not Somalia. It''s Arkansas."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama so hairy and fat, that when she went to a museum they yelled "the mammoth''s alive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama and daddy r so fat, half the world went to ur mom, the other to ur dad.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('wat do u call a female dog?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('did u have a pussy around ur head?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I would like to take this opportunity to announce that I am the proud father of an 8 pound 7 ounce baby boy. Boy, is my wife gonna be mad when she finds out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Seen on a bumper sticker: "IF CLINTON IS THE ANSWER, THEN IT MUST BE A STUPID QUESTION." Seen on another bumper sticker: "CLINTON HAPPENS."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a couple in Arkansas get married, move to Washington, then move back to Arkansas, are they still brother and sister?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Hillary are at a restaurant. The waiter tells them tonight''s special is chicken almondine and fresh fish. "The chicken sounds good; I''ll have that," Hillary says. The waiter nods. "And the vegetable?" he asks. "Oh, He''ll have a cheeseburger," Hillary replies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Clinton called the White House interior decorator into the Oval Office. He was very furious and said, "Chelsea is very upset because she thinks she has the ugliest room in the entire White House; I want something done about it immediately!" Yes Sir, Mr. President," the interior decorator replies. "I''ll have those mirrors removed right away!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks his students to spell the word "before". The first kid tries: "B-E-F-O-H-R." "No", says the teacher, "that''s wrong!" Another kid: "B-E-E-F-O-R." "No, no," says the teacher. "Anybody else?" A little boy raises his hand: "B-E-F-O-R-E!" "Now, that''s right!" beams the teacher. "Now, Washington, use this word ''before'' in a sentence!" and the boy goes: "Two plus two BE FOUR!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two kids are arguing over whose father is the biggest scaredy-cat. The first kid said, "My dad is so scared that, when lightning strikes, he hides underneath the bed." "Oh, yeah? That''s nothing," said the second kid. "My dad is so scared that, when my mom has to work the night shift, he goes next door to sleep with Mrs. Jones!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dogs... ...steal your food. ...eat all of your tennis balls. ...make you pick up their waste products. ...take all of your covers. ...eat out of the trash. ...beg. ...bark loudly at 1:00 in the morning. ...drink out of the toilet, while it still has poo in it. ...have accidents, on your floor. And you call you dog your BEST friend, I can''t imagine what your other friends do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Welshman, walking through a field, sees a man drinking water from a pool with his hands. He shouts, "Paid a yfed y dwr mae''r gwartheg yn cachi yn y dwr!" (Don''t drink the water, there''s cow shit in it!) The man shouts back, "I''m English, I don''t understand you!" The Welshman calls back, "Use both hands, you''ll get more in!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Racing through the snow a onewarde southern sleigh, all the way we go bahing through the trees, the snow is turning red, I think i''m almost dead, all the children laugh and play around my stupid head!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three women are in a gym locker room dressing up to play racquetball, suddenly, a guy runs through the room wearing nothing but a bag over his head and passes the three women. He passes the first woman, who looks down at his penis. "He''s not my husband," she says. He passes by the second woman, who also looks down at his penis. "He''s not my husband either." She says, also not recognizing the unit. He passes by the third woman, who also looks down as he runs by her. "Wait a minute," she says. "He''s not even a member of this club."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is One Foot Enough??? A girl in the U.S. lived very far away from her mother. One day, the girl became engaged but discovered her fiance had only one foot. The girl, surprised sent her mother a letter asking for advice. The letter began, "Mother, my husband has only one foot..." The mother upon receiving the letter was confused on why that was a problem. She immediately wrote back to her daughter saying, "Dear, one foot is enough. your father has only 7 inches!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time, there was a man holding a magical lamp, he went to a bar where he then got a drink. The bartender sees him and asks him to chat, the man says,"I have a magical lamp rite here!" The bartender says," Wow, does this mean I can wish for a million bucks." The man goes, "Yes!" Bartender goes:" I wish for a million bucks!" POOF! The air is filled with 1 million ducks. The bartender outraged says," Hey you cheated me!" The man goes, "Hey it ain''t that easy!" *Sorry, Did my best', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde named Megan decides to go out for a ride in her new convertible. While she''s out driving she sees her best friend Christina, another blonde. She has a sign that reads "Vegas or Bust." "Why are you leaving?" asked Megan. "Some guy came up to me and told me to get out of town." "Come with me. We''ll go find the guy that said this and find out what''s up." Christina got in the car and they drove until Christina said she saw the guy who told her to leave town. As they approached him, he looked at Christina and said, "I remember you." She cowered behind Megan. "You forgot your flier." He handed her a flier that read "Get Outta Town! To Sunny Beach Resorts California!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A stockbroker is beginning his jail sentence for fraud, and meets his cell-mate for next seven years. He stares in shock at the weirdo next to him, when the psycopath says, "Don''t worry, I''m in here for a white-collar crime as well." The stockbroker is very relieved, and asks what crime the man had committed. The wild-haired, unkempt freak replies, "I killed a priest!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Velcro - what a rip-off!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Getting married is very much like going to a continental restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that. A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don''t know, son, I''m still paying for it." Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn''t know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in most countries, son. Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late. A happy marriage is a matter of give and take; the husband gives and the wife takes. When a newly married man looks happy we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy - we wonder why.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Believe it or not, Windows95 is not a virus, as many (millions) have claimed. You want proof? Look no further! What''s the difference between Windows95 and a virus? Quality Replicates Quickly Virus: Yes Windows95: Yes Uses up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so Virus: Yes Windows95: Yes Occasional hard disk destruction Virus: Yes Windows95: Yes Usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems Virus: Yes Windows95:Yes Will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow and the user will buy new hardware Virus:Yes Windows95:Yes Occasional meltdown of vital components Virus:Yes Windows95:Yes Until now it seems Windows is a virus, but there are several fundamental differences. Viruses: 1.are well supported by their authors 2.are running on most systems 3.have fast, compact and efficient source code 4.become more sophisticated as they mature', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does the "95" in Windows95 mean anyway? 10. The number of floppies it will ship in. 9. The percentage of users who will have to upgrade their hardware. 8. The number of megabytes of hard disk space required. 7. The number of pages in the "EASY INSTALL" version of the manual. 6. The percentage of existing programs that won''t run in the new OS. 5. The number of hours to install. 4. The number of calls to tech support before you can get it to run. 3. The number of people who will actually pay for the upgrade. 2. Meg of RAM required for the damn thing to run. 1. The year it was DUE to ship.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dogs crawl under fences...Software crawls under Windows95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Scanning for viruses...Windows95 found...Please delete.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Double your drive space...Delete Windows95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Friends don''t let friends use Windows95.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If at first you don''t succeed...work for Microsoft.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Turn your Pentium into a gameboy...Type "WIN" at the prompt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Windows95...the best $159 Solitaire game you can buy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Activate your own virus... type "WIN" at the prompt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife are walking down the High Street one evening, when the wife saw a beautiful diamond necklace in the jeweller''s shop window. "Oh," she exclaims, "I really would like that! Do you think you could get it for me?" With that, he looks around and finally locates a brick, which he promptly lobs through the window; he then grabs the necklace, and the two of them leg it. "Oh, there was a lovely pair of earrings to match in the other window!" she says. "What, do you think I''m MADE of bricks?" he exclaims.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best way to accelerate Windows is through one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It seems that a lawyer had a little bit too much to drink and on his way home rear-ended the car in front of him. The lawyer got out of his car, walked over to the driver of the other car and said, "Boy, are you in trouble! I''m a lawyer!" The driver looked out his window and said, "No, you''re in trouble. I''m a judge."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This house, said the real estate salesman, "has both its good points and its bad points. To show you I''m honest, I''m going to tell you about both. "The disadvantage is that there is a chemical plant one block south and a slaughterhouse a block north." "What is the advantage?" inquired the prospective buyer. "The advantage is that you can always tell which way the wind is blowing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The minister''s car wouldn''t start, so he called the garage. When the tow truck driver arrived, the minister says, "I hope you go easy on me. You know I''m only a poor preacher." "Yep," replied the tow truck driver, "I''ve heard you preach."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A priest wanted to go to the post office, so he asked a little boy the way. The boy took him to the post office. The priest said to the boy, "Thank you. Come to the church tomorrow and I will show you the way to Heaven." The boy turned and said, "But you don''t even know the way to the post office."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man having conversation with God, when his whole life flashed before his eyes as a series of footsteps on the sands of time. He saw that there were two pairs of footprints, but during the most difficult periods of his life there was only one set of footprints. He asked God, "You said you will be with me throughout this journey, but why have you deserted me during the most critical times of my life?" God replied, "Son, I did not desert you, I was always with you. You see only one set of footprints because, during those difficult times in your life, I was carrying you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five year old Becky answered the door when the census taker came by. She told the census taker that her daddy was a doctor and wasn''t home, because he was performing an appendectomy. "My," said the census taker, "that sure is a big word for such a little girl. Do you know what it means?" "Sure! Fifteen hundred bucks, and that doesn''t even include the anesthesiologist!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A six-year-old boy told his father he wanted to marry the little girl across the street. The father, being modern and well-schooled in handling children, hid his smile behind his hand. "That''s a serious step," he said. "Have you thought it out completely?" "Sure," his young son answered. "We can spend one week in my room and the next in hers. It''s right across the street, so I can run home if I get lonely in the night." "How about transportation? " the father asked. "I have my wagon, and we both have our tricycles," the little boy answered. The boy had an answer to every question the father raised. Finally, in exasperation, the man asked, "What about babies? When you''re married, you''re liable to have babies, you know." "We''ve thought about that, too," the little boy replied. "We''re not going to have babies. Every time she lays an egg, I''m going to step on it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To impress his date, the young man took her to a very chic Italian restaurant. After sipping some fine wine, he picked up the menu and studied it with an appraising eye. "We''ll have the Giuseppe Spomdalucci," he said finally. "Sorry, sir," said the waiter. "That''s the owner."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo'' momma so fat that you gotta be Clifford the Big Red Dog to hit it doggystyle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is rated ''E'' for everyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a pirate''s favorite food? Taco Bell''s cARRne asada.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the chicken say to the bully? Why don''t you peck on someone your own size?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Clinton returns from a vacation in Arkansas and walks down the steps of Air Force One with two pigs under his arms. At the bottom of the steps, the honor guardsman steps forward and remarks, "Nice pigs, Mr. President." Clinton replies, "I''ll have to let you know that these are genuine Arkansas Razor Back Hogs. I got this one for Chelsea and this one for Hillary. So, now what do you think?" The honor guardsman answers: "Nice trade, Sir."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('According to the Institute of Incomplete Research, 7 out of 10 people are', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (' Prof. Tom will not meet his classes this afternoon. classesc l', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BASIC: Bill''''s Attempt to Seize Industry Control ISDN: It Still Does Nothing DOS: Defunct Operating System MACINTOSH: Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs WINDOWS: Will Install Needless Data On Whole System MICROSOFT: Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a bus staion named Ureliar (You-Really- Are), a man went to the station and waited for his train, he waited and a man came up to him and said,"Hey,my name is Emabuthed (I''m-A-Butt-Head), what''s the name of the station?" "Ureliar?" replied the man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When we are born, our mothers get the compliments and the flowers. When we get married, our brides get the presents and the publicity. When we die, our widows get the life insurance. What do women want to be liberated from?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A city slicker was driving through the country when he spotted a horse standing in a field. He was quite taken with the animal and so pulled over to ask the farmer if it was for sale. "Afraid not," said the farmer. "I''ll give you a thousand bucks!" said the city fella. "I can''t sell you that horse. He don''t look too good," replied the farmer. "I know horses, and he looks fine. I''ll give you two thousand!" "Well, all right, if you want him so bad." The next day, the man returned the horse, screaming that he had been gypped. "You sold me a blind horse!" "Well," said the farmer, "I told you he didn''t look too good."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man limped into a hospital to have his foot X-rayed, and was asked to wait for the results. Some time later an orderly appeared and handed the man a large pill. Just then a mother with a small child in need of immediate attention entered. After the orderly disappeared with the new patient, the man hobbled over to get a glass of water, swallow the pill, and sat down to wait. Some time later the orderly reappeared carrying a bucket of water. "Okay," he said, "Just drop the pill in this bucket and soak your foot for a while."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy couldn''t decide whether to go to Salt Lake City or Denver for vacation, so he called the airlines to get prices. "Airfare to Denver is $300," said a cheery salesperson. "And what about Salt Lake City?" "We have a really great rate to Salt Lake - $99.00, but there is a stopover." "Where?" "Denver."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man went fishing one day. He looked over the side of his boat, and saw a snake with a frog in its mouth. Feeling sorry for the frog, he reached down, gently took the frog from the snake, and set the frog free - but then he felt sorry for the snake. He looked around the boat, but he had no food. All he had was a bottle of bourbon, so he opened the bottle and gave the snake a few shots. The snake went off happy, the frog was happy, and the man was happy to have performed such good deeds. He thought everything was great until about ten minutes passed and he heard something knock against the side of the boat. With stunned disbelief, the fisherman looked down and saw the snake was back with two frogs!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you''re right, no one remembers. When you''re wrong, no one forgets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway, and after a fruitless search, he told his mother the lens was nowhere to be found. Undaunted, she went outside and in a few minutes returned with the lens in her hand. "How did you manage to find it, Mom?" the teenager asked. "We weren''t looking for the same thing," she replied. "You were looking for a small piece of plastic; I was looking for $150."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little girl and a little boy were at day care. The girl approaches the boy and says, "Hey Tommy, wanna play house?" He says, "Sure! What do you want me to do?" The girl replies, "I want you to communicate your thoughts." "Communicate my thoughts?" said a bewildered Tommy. "I have no idea what you mean." The little girl smirks and says, "Perfect. You can be the husband."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Christian missionary was making his first visit to a tribe in Borneo. The missionary asked the chief, "Do you people know anything about religion?" After a pause, the chief answered, "We got a little taste of it when the last missionary was here."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s invisible and very frightened? A ghost with the sheet scared out of him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy Bob caught his friend Bubba searching high and low all around his living room. Billy Bob said, "What are you searching for?" Bubba replies, "Hidden cameras!" "And what makes you think that there are hidden cameras here?" says Billy Bob. Bubba said, "That guy on TV knows exactly what I am doing. Why, every few minutes he says, ''You are watching MTV!'' How does he know that?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two lawyers had been life long friends: they were partners and shared everything, including their hot-blooded secretary. One day the secretary announced she was pregnant. They told her not to worry and assured her that they would pay all medical costs and would act as co-fathers when the child was born and provide all expenses thereafter. The day of delivery arrived, and both the lawyers were at the hospital pacing the floor in the waiting room. Finally one of them said, "I can''t take this, I''m going down to sit in my car and wait there. Please come down and tell me as soon as the child is born!" The partner agreed to do that. About an hour later the partner approached the car with a very grave look on his face. "What happened?" asked the waiting car occupant. The other partner announced, "They were twins and mine died!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Each day when I would come home from work I would drop to my knees and ask my 4-year-old son if he wanted to box. I wanted him to learn how to protect himself, so we would spar around for a few minutes before supper. One day my wife and I took our son to get new shoes. The shoe salesman was friendly and allowed my son to try on several pairs of shoes before we decided on a particular pair that he liked. We asked if he wanted to wear them home and he replied, "Yes." The salesman, who was kneeling on the floor in front of our son, held the old shoes in his hands and asked, "Do you want a box?" Our son stood up and punched him right on the nose. After grabbing our son we had to spend the next several minutes explaining why this happened. Luckily, our salesman was the father of a 4-year-old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So, Jane asked the detective she had hired. "Did you trail my husband?" "Yes, ma''am, I did. I followed him to a bar, to an out-of-the-way restaurant and then to an apartment." A big smile crossed Jane''s face. "Aha! I''ve got him!" she said gloating, "Is there any doubt what he was doing?" "No ma''am," replied the sleuth, "It''s pretty clear that he was following you."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Each evening bird lover Tom stood in his backyard, hooting like an owl - and one night, an owl called back to him. For a year, the man and his feathered friend hooted back and forth, with Tom even keeping a log of the "conversation." Just as Tom thought he was on the verge of a breakthrough in inter-species communication, his wife had a chat with next-door neighbour''s wife. "My husband spends his nights . . . calling out to owls," said Mrs. Rowe. "That''s odd," Mrs. Hollis replied. "So does my John." Then it dawned on them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A teenage girl had just been given family-car privileges, when she returned home very late from a party. The next morning her father went out to the driveway to get the newspaper and came back into the house frowning. At 11:30am the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen, and her father asked her, "What time did you get in last night?" "Not too late, Dad," she replied nervously. Dead-pan, her father said, "Then I''ll have to talk with the paperboy about putting my paper under the front wheel of the car."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, early in the morning, a naked man was lying on a beach reading the newspaper. He saw a little girl skipping towards him. Quickly he covered himself with the newspaper just as the little girl spotted him. She comes by him and says,"Good morning, What''s under the newspaper?" The man replied,"A birdie!" The little girl started dancing and said,"Can I see it." The man Quickly snaps,"NO! It''s sleeping." The little girl skips away ad the man falls asleep. After a few hours he wakes up and notices he''s in the hospital. He calls over the doctor and asks why he was in the hospital. The doctor replies,"Ask that little girl." The little girl shyly goes over and says,"I was playing with the birdie, it spit on me, so i broke its neck, cracked its eggs and sets it nest on fire."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My mother has a "lead foot," so I was not surprised when a state trooper pulled us over as we were speeding through Georgia. Hoping to get off with a warning, Mom tried to appear shocked when the trooper walked up to the car. "I have never been stopped like this before," she said to the officer. "What do they usually do, ma''am?" he asked, "shoot the tires out?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man and old woman had been married for about 52 years when one day the old woman died. The entire family showed up to the funeral. Every day after the funeral the old man would show up at the grave with his dog and spend a few minutes there. About two months later, a priest saw the old man there with his dog and decided to go talk to the old man. "Hello there. You know, we see you come out here every day to visit your wife''s grave and we just think that so sweet. We were all wondering if the dog is something that was special to your wife since you always bring it out here with you." "No, actually I bring the dog out here to pee on the grave. I''d do it myself, but I''d get arrested for indecent exposure!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For the first time in many years, an old man traveled from his rural town to the city to attend a movie. After buying his ticket, he stopped at the concession stand to purchase some popcorn. Handing the attendant $1.50, he couldn''t help but comment, "The last time I came to the movies, popcorn was only 15 cents." "Well, sir," the attendant replied with a grin, "you''re really going to enjoy yourself - we have sound now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One beautiful December evening Pedro and his girlfriend Rosita were sitting on a bench by the side of the ocean. It was a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey, Mamacita, let''s do Weeweechu." "Oh, no, not now, let''s look at the moon!" said Rosita. "Oh, c''mon baby, let''s you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it''s the perfect time," Pedro begged. "But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon," replied Rosita. "Please, corazoncita, just once, do Weeweechu with me." Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK, one time, we''ll do Weeweechu." Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang ..... "Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Jear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You are young and beautiful, have 2 university degrees, and are fluent in 3 languages. You have long blonde hair, long legs and a killer smile and you want to earn a salary no less than 100 000$ per year. That''s nice. But we need a plumber.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Almost two hours into the Clemens and McNamee hearing, some interesting quotes can be found. (Credits to Yahoo! Sports, and ''Duk) "Mr. Clemens bled through his designer pants." "Mr. Clemens, do you recall any bleeding through your pants in 2001?" "Those little band-aids for his butt, if it bled." "Mr. Clemens, according to your account, Mr. McNamee injected your wife in your bedroom without your knowledge." "That said there was a palpable mass on the right buttock of Mr. Clemens. On another record, it also noticed a similar mass on the left buttock." "That was a hurried instance when we were in the closet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Winters are fierce in northern Scotland, so the owner of the estate felt he was doing a good deed when he bought a pair of earmuffs for his foreman. One cold, blustery day, he noticed that the foreman wasn''t wearing them. In fact, he couldn''t recall a time he''d ever seen the man wear the earmuffs. Walking up to his foreman, he asked, "Didn''t you like the earmuffs I gave you?" "Oh, they were a thing of beauty and kept my ears nice and toasty warm!" "Then why aren''t you wearing them?" "Well, I did wear them that first cold day, but then someone offered me a drink and I didn''t hear him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A new bride told her husband she was concerned that their honeymoon suite in the Watergate Hotel in Washington, D.C., might still be bugged from the Watergate scandal days. The groom agreed to check it out. He looked behind the drapes, he looked behind the pictures, he looked behind the mirrors, he looked under the rug and... "HEY!" he shouted. Under the rug was a small plate with four screws! He unscrewed the screws with his knife and threw them and the plate out the window. "There, that takes care of any bugs," he reassured his new bride. And the couple quickly jumped in bed and did what newlyweds do. The next morning, the hotel manager knocked on their door and asked the couple, "Was your stay satisfactory? How was the service? Did you enjoy your room?" The groom said, "Fine. Why do you ask?" The manager said, "Because, last night, the couple in the room under yours had their chandelier fall on them!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A family was traveling across country, and were on their first stop for gas. Getting out to stretch their legs, they walked into the gas station and began to look at the various items that were placed around them. The son goes over to a rack of books, and picks up one and laughs. "''Cooking With Mormons.'' We should definitely get this one," he sarcastically stated. The father grabbed it from his hands and stared at it for a minute, then said, "Maybe it''ll tell us how to cook them right." The son looked confused and said blankly "Who?" "The Mormons, of course," was his reply.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? 1. No, 2, no, 4, no, 8, no, 16, 32, 64, 128 . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many movie stars does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but he takes one step up the ladder and then his stunt double takes over!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BLONDE #1: I found some jokes about us blondes online. They''re inaccurate! They make us look- BLONDE #2:Ugly? BLONDE #3:Fat? BLONDE #4:Lazy? BLONDE #5:Mean? BLONDE #1:No, stupidly funny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple was having a conversation, and the wife asked her husband a simple question :- "Boxers or briefs?" Her husband replied :- "Depends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three kids were walking on a beach looking for shells when one of them finds a magic lamp. They rub it, and the genie that comes out said that each could fall into a pit of whatever they desired. The first guy said "Money and treasure" and then he was poofed into a pit of money and treasure. The second guy said "Pleasure, happiness, and electronics" and then he was poofed into a pit of pleasure, happiness, and electonics. Then the third guy (who was stupid and swore/cussed a lot) said "Ah CRAP!!! Those were my ideas!" and then he was poofed intoa pile of crap (or faeces, or poop, whichever you prefer calling it!)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('California Version The latest telephone poll taken by the California Governor''s office asked whether people who live in California think illegal immigration is a serious problem: 29% of respondents answered: "Yes, it is a serious problem." 71% of respondents answered: "No es un problema serio."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2. Australia Version A recent survey in Australia asked the following question: Are there too many foreigners in this country now? Answer: 18% said: YES 82% said: ! ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day at Lee Elementary in the 1st grade hallway a little boy named Chris(kid #2 from my spoiled brat joke) and another child name sarah are walking down the hall way. (sarah and chris bump into each other) sarah:watch it doo doo head. chris:you watch it cootie pants. sarah:who are you calling cootie pants,freckle face. chris:you,little miss bucktooth. sarah:well you''re nothing but a ugly butt. chris:why don''t you shut the hell up you god damn mother fucking bitch ass whore.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, he eats for a lifetime. Give a man a fire, he''s warm for a day. Set a man on fire, he''s warm for the rest of his life.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Greeks Do Business CON talks to his son George. CON (father): "I want you to marry a girl of my choice." GEORGE (son): "I will choose my own bride!" CON (father): "But the girl is Bill Gates'' daughter.." GEORGE (son): "Well, in that case... okay." Next CON approaches Bill Gates. CON (father): "I have a husband for your daughter.... " Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!" CON (father): "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank." Bill Gates: "Ah! In that case... okay." Finally, CON goes to see the president of the World Bank. CON: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president." President: "But I already have more vice-presidents than I need!" CON: "But this young man is Bill Gates'' son-in-law." President: "Ah, in that case... okay." And that is how Greeks do business.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I asked my girl-friend what she would like for her birthday, and she said she would like a green jumper. So I bought her a frog.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Many of you may be too young to remember U.S. comedian Sam Levenson; he was popular from the 1940s through the mid-1960s. Levenson said things that made sense and it would be a shame if they faded into oblivion, so here are a few of his "nuggets" worth assaying. 1. The first screw to get loose in your head is the one that holds your tongue in place. 2. You''re only young once. After that it takes some other excuse for behaving like an idiot. 3. Even if the majority agrees on an idiotic idea, it is still an idiotic idea. 4. There are more important things in life than money. The trouble is they all cost money. 5. On sex education in schools: Let them teach it! If the schools teach sex the way they teach everything else, the kids will lose interest anyhow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The judge read the charges, then asked: "Are you the defendant in this case?" "No, your honor," replied Tommy. "I''ve got a lawyer to do the defending. I''m the person who did it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were some kids playing hopscotch and they were allowed to skip so when the winner was on 8 it went straight to 10', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('once a women was in her home and she heard someone go knock-knock. she said, who''s their and the voice said tisha the women said tisha who the voice said tisha me my abcs and she was like is that a ghost. the voice said, i''m your cousin and it was a knock-knock joke. oh the woman said', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a President who had a law that evryone had to laugh once a hour or they spent an hour in jail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde and her husband go to buy her new clothes. First, they decide she needs a new shirt, so they go through a few shirts but she rejects them all. Finally she points at one that she likes, but he thinks it is ugly, so he says no. They go through almost the whole store, and she says no to all of the shirts. Bored and annoyed, the husband finally goes up to the shirt she likes and generously "Fine, do you want this polo shirt?" The wife thinks for a few seconds and says "Oh, it''s Apollo shirt? In that case no, I''m really not into mythology."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Give me food and I will live. Give me water and I will die. What or who am I? (Scroll down) A fire', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Policeman to woman he''s just stopped for speeding - "As soon as I saw you coming round the corner, I said to myself, ''Must be 55 at least''." "It''s this dress, officer - it always make me look older!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an intelligent, good looking and sensitive man? A rumour', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The attractive man I met last night insists he just wants to be friends, the girl told her Aunt. "Now I know what to do with a lover, but what the heck do I do with a ''friend''?" The wise old lady smiled and said, "The same as with your lover, dearie, only not quite so often."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two blondes are racing down a bumpy back road in a car down to a bank they''re going to rob. "Drive slower" pleads the blonde in the passenger seat, "I don''t want all the nitro in the boot to explode." "Relax," the driver replies, "even if it did, I''ve got a spare box under the seat . . . "', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I''ll waste no time in reading it. - Moses Hadas.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Soccer Coach: Why didn''t you stop the ball? New Goalie: I thought that was what the net was for!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brad: I have to take three courses in college; French, Spanish, and algebra Chris: Okay, let me hear you say hi in algebra.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Larry: Yo momma so old her birth certificate said expired! Jerry: You know, at least I have a mom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Brad: Chad, how does Sherlock Holmes sneeze? Chad: A clue ! A clue!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Justin if I had ten tennis balls in one hand, and twelve in another what would I have? Justin: Huge hands sir', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so ugly she made a blind person cry!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The oldest Yo Momma joke in the book: Yo momma so fat that she''s fat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Jackie, please use the word "climate" in a sentence please. Jackie: Sure, I have a cherry tree in my backyard, but my parents won''t let me "climate" Teacher: That''s correct! Teacher: Now, Luis use the word "arrest" in a sentence. Luis: Sure, after running a mile I need "arrest"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve got good news and bad news. The good news is that there is no bad news. The bad news is that there is no good news.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so fat when she peed in China, she made the Yellow River!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Because Lexus created the park it your self car many Mexicans lost their jobs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde girl comes into her dad''s room and tells her dad... Amanda: Dad, I''m glad you named me Amanda. Dad: Why? Amanda: It''s because that''s what everyone calls me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ryan: Hey Philip, what''s that on your leg? Philip: A shoe! Ryan: Gesundheit! Philip: No, you idiot, a shoe! Ryan: No need to thank me, gesundheit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar and sits down next to a beautiful blonde. "I just got this amazing watch," he tells her, "it can reads alpha waves, and can tell me what a person is thinking." "What does it say about me?" asked the blonde. "It says you want to sleep with me," said the man. "Sorry," said the blonde, "I think your watch is broken." "Hmmm," said the man, slowly examining the watch, "It seems to be running an hour fast..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dog goes up to a man with a pizza and starts whining for some. Man to Owner: Can I throw him a bit? Owner smiles proudly: Yes. The man picks up the dog and throws him on the ground.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Larry: Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great Fall? Mary: Because he had a bad summer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom: Jimmy, did you pick up your room yet? JImmy: No mom, it''s too heavy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond finished his English exam and came out. His friends asked him how did he do in his exam; he replied, "Exam was okay, but for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought, thought ... and at last I wrote THUNK!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: What is 5 plus 4? Blonde: 9 Teacher: What is 4 plus 5? Blonde: Are you trying to fool me, you''ve just twisted the figure. The answer is 6!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What would you like to have; fruit juice, Soda, Tea, Chocolate, Milo, or coffee? "Tea, please." "Ceylon tea, Herbal tea, Bush tea, Honey bush tea, Ice tea or green tea?" "Ceylon tea." "How would you like it? Black or white?" "White." "Milk, Whitener, or Condensed milk?" "With milk, please." "Goat milk, Camel milk or cow milk?" "With cow milk, please." "Milk from Friesland cow or African cow?" "Um, I''ll take it black." "Would you like it with sweetener, sugar or honey?" "With sugar, please." "Beet sugar or cane sugar?" "Cane sugar, please." "White, brown or yellow sugar?" "Forget about tea, just give me a glass of water instead." "Mineral water or still water?" "Mineral water, please." "Flavored or non-flavored?" "I''d rather die of thirst!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some Wocka jokes have been picked by the system as the "joke of the day". However, how can you know which day the joke was picked? Searching does not work, and it will be very tiring to browse page after page. Look at its comments and see in which day it received lots of comments!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many moves, at least, are required to stalemate in chess? Nineteen moves. 1.h4 h5 2.c4 a5 3.Qa4 Ra6 4.Qxa5 Rah6 5.Qxc7 f6 6.Qxd7+ Kf7 7.Qxb7 Qd3 8.Qxb8 Qh7 9.Qxc8 Kg6 10.Qe6', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many moves, at least, are required to checkmate in chess? Four moves. 1.f4 e5 2.g4 Qh4#', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many diagonals does an N-polygon have? N(N-3)/2.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is just about to break a record. Suddenly, a dog jump up and bites him on the neck. Q: Is the dog owned by the former record keeper? A: Yes. Q: Did the former record keeper intend this to stop other people from breaking his record? A: Yes. The murderer doesn''t want other people to break his record. Therefore, he has trained his dog, so that when the dog hears someone speaking the last digits of pi that the murderer can recite, it will bite him to death.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is 60 divided by 1/3rd? Read carefully. If you think it''s 180, then you''re wrong! The answer is 20. 3rd is 1/3. 1/3rd is 1/(1/3), and therefore 3. 60 divided by 3 is 20.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The median of the list n; n+3, n+4; n+5; n+6; n+8; n+10; n+12; n+15 is 10. What is the mean? What is the median and what is the mean? There are 9 numbers, and the median is the 5th number n+6. Compare each number with the median, the mean is 10+(-6-3-2-1+2+4+6+9)/9=11.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('20 = best score in lowball bowling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('162 = worst score in golf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('72 = best score in golf.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the school the biology teacher asks the class a question. "Where is an elephant''s sex organ?" Little Johnny, "In his feet ma''am." Teacher, "How come?" "If he steps on you, you''re fucked."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Johnny''s father asked him, "Do you know about the birds and the bees?" "I don''t want to know!" little Johnny said, bursting into tears. Confused, the father asked little Johnny what was wrong. "Oh dad," Little Johnny sobbed, "At age six I got the ''there''s no Santa'' speech. At age seven I got the ''there''s no Easter bunny'' speech. Then at age 8 you hit me with the ''there''s no tooth fairy'' speech! If you''re going to tell me now that grown-ups don''t really fuck, I''ve got nothing left to live for!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The government has recently issued a statement saying that 18.9 percent of all statistics are false.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Aron: Throw all of your fish in the air. Jake: Why? Aron: So I can tell my mom I honestly caught them.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cinfuscious says : It is nice to meet a woman in the park but is better to park meat in a woman.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Patient: Doctor, doctor, I know a person who is an owl. Doctor: Who? Patient: Now I know two. Doctor: "Did you take the patient''s temperature?" Nurse: "No. Is it missing?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sean: I''ve finally cleared my mind! Dean: Does your new one work?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a sportswear shop, and when a pretty blonde assistant asks him what he wants, he goes red in the face and stammers, "A packet of condoms, please." The assistant says, "This is a sportswear shop, we don''t sell condoms!" and the man leaves. Two days later, he''s back. "A packet of condoms, please." "I''ve told you before, we don''t sell condoms!" and again, he gets all flustered and leaves hurriedly. Three days later, and he enters the shop again. This time, the manager is ready for him, and goes up to him, saying, "We do NOT sell condoms!" He blusters, and eventually admits, "Actually, I''m after a Dallas Cowboys shirt, but I was just too embarrassed to ask for one!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s round and hard and sticks so far out of a man''s pajamas you can hang a hat on it? His head!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a wedding, the D.J. polled the guests to see who had been married the longest. The winners were then asked, "What advice do you have for the newlyweds?" The wife quickly responded, "The three most important words in a marriage are ''You''re probably right''." Everyone then looked at the husband. He said, "Yeah, she''s probably right!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day I live with fear, but occasionally I leave her and go drag racing. "I like to snatch kisses and vice versa." Seen on an attractive and busty brunette: "Size DOES matter!" Seen on a different attractive and busty brunette: "We could mate ...(picture of black widow spider) ... but then I''d have to kill you." Seen on a very overweight guy in a parking lot: "I beat anorexia." "Goal Of A Bitch: To dominate, control and destroy a man''s finances, mental health, self-esteem and any hope for happiness." Seen being worn by one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four friends are at a bar one night when they spy a gorgeous woman sitting down at a table. They know they can''t all have her so they decide to take turns trying to get the girl. The first friend walks up to the woman and says "Is it hot in here or is it just you"? The woman replies by turning away and the man plods back sadly to his friends. The second friend sits down next to her and very romantically states "heaven must be missing an angel". The lady tells him to leave so he goes back to sit with his friends. The third friend orders her a drink and sits down with her. He places his hand on her leg and before he can utter a word she calls security and he gets thrown out the bar. The fourth and final friend walks over to her table and bluntly says "want to go have unprotected sex"? They became married 2 months later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy is sitting with a woman at a bar late at night and they are flirting with each other. The lady tells him all about herself and the man sits there listening. After she is done, the man repeats what she said. "So, you''re a 20 year old college graduate from Harvard, a famous fashion model, you love video games and football, you like to do housework, you never complain, you don''t own a cell phone, you''re a virgin, your parents are dead and they left you loads of money, you have perfect teeth, shiny and smooth hair, no wrinkles or blemishes, you have 2% body fat, you''re always willing to have sex, your brother is Peyton Manning, you have a hot bi-sexual roommate, and a 3 story house". She nods her head, "Yup, that''s me". The man squints at her and asks, "Is that pre-op or post-op?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('John had been working for an Advertising Firm for almost three years, and was getting a promotion, when his boss called him into his office. "John, I''m sorry, I''m gonna have to let you go. When I put you up for promotion, the company did a background check, and we found out that you got kicked out of Yale for lying about getting your diploma. I''m sorry, but I need you out within the hour." "But I''ve been working so hard, I''ve been doing such good work," John said "I''m sorry, John, but we can''t have liars working for us." "But this is an advertising firm!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A machine operator comes home from the factory and tells his wife, "Honey, I''ve got some good news and some bad news. First, the good news, I got $25,000 severance pay!" His wife said, "$25,000 in severance pay? That''s great! So what''s the bad news?" He said, "Wait till you hear what was severed!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many ventriloquists does it take to change a light bulb? Two - one to change the light bulb, and one to holg ge gottong og ge lagger.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when a president gets elected in a year with a "0" at the end? 1840: William Henry Harrison (Died in Office) 1860: Abraham Lincoln (Assassinated) 1880: James A. Garfield (Assassinated) 1900: William McKinley (Assassinated) 1920: Warren G. Harding (Died in Office) 1940: Franklin D. Roosevelt (Died in Office) 1960: John F. Kennedy (Assassinated) 1980: Ronald Reagan (Survived assassination attempt) And to think that we had two guys duking it out in the courts to be the one elected in 2000!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Who is the greatest prostitute in history? Ms.Pacman For 50 cents she''ll swallow balls until she dies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A professional photographer, at a friend''s house for dinner, was asked to show his portfolio from a recent overseas trip. His friends were quite impressed. "What wonderful photos!" said the host''s wife. "You must have a very expensive camera." The photographer just smiled and waited until after dinner, when he said, "Thank you for the delicious meal. You must have very *expensive* pans!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Poop!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A midget walks into a bar and trips over some sh*t left on the floor. Luckily no one saw him, so to avoid embarrassment, he doesn''t make a fuss about it. So he goes to bar and orders a drink. A few minutes later a big fella comes to the bar and trips over the same piece of sh*t. The midget smiles and says, "I just did that". So the big fella comes over to the midget and knocks him out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? R R A Y Y X-ray!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fill in the blank: The one who says it cannot be done should never _________ the one who is doing it. Interrupt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? HOT HOT HANDLE HANDLE Too hot to handle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? E L G G U R T S Uphill struggle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Using the BrainTracker grid below, how many words can you find? Each word must contain the central W and no letter can be used twice, however, the letters do not have to be connected. Proper nouns are not allowed, however, plurals are. There is at least one nine letter word. Excellent: 23 words. Good: 18 words. Average: 15 words. Common words: low, lower, lowlier, owe, owl, pew, pillow, power, prow, prowl, row, we, weir, well, will, willow, WILLPOWER, wipe, wiper, wire, woe, wore, wow. All words: low, lowe, lower, lowlier, lwei, ow, owe, owl, pew, pillow, plew, plow, plower, pow, power, prow, prowl, row, rowel, we, weir, well, wile, will, willer, willow, willower, WILLPOWER, wipe, wiper, wire, wo, woe, wore, wow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? M L I K Milk shake!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fill in the blanks such that the second blank is the reverse action of the first one: The famous musician Mozart ________ symphonies when he was alive and __________ after he died. Composed and decomposed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Please answer yes or no to this question. Is your answer "no"? Hint: This is under trick, remember. Answer: Yes or no.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? B SAI Bonsai! B (on) SAI.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? knee light light Neon lights!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('little susie was looking through her mothers purse and found a tampon and said what is this ? her mother said a pen. so later on that day he mother went shopping and an elderly man said miss do you have a pen and so little susie said it''s in mommy''s bagina !!!! so the old mans teeth fell out and he dropped to huis knees and said do you want me to search?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? HEAR T Broken heart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? T N O R F O T Back to front!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? WOWOLFOL Wolf in sheep''s clothing (wool)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? R E N N U R Runner up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? heart heart heart Heart-to-heart!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? STEPPETSPETS One step forward, two steps back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? EGASSAM Back massage!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? DO WN Broken down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is represented by this? Way One Way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What letter comes next? D, L, M, M, J, V, ... S. The letters are the first letters of Spanish days of the week, domingo, lunes, martes, miercoles, jueves, viernes, sabado.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('He v. She The family picture is on his desk - Ah, a solid, responsible family man. The family picture is on her desk - Um, her family will come before her career. His desk is cluttered - He''s obviously a hard worker and a busy man. Her desk is cluttered - She''s obviously a disorganized scatterbrain. He is talking with his co-workers - He must be discussing the latest deal. She is talking with her co-workers - She must be gossiping. He''s not in the office - He must be meeting a customer. She''s not in the office - She must be out shopping. He''s having lunch with the boss - He''s on his way up. She''s having lunch with the boss - They must be having an affair.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My pal is addicted to brake fluid - but he says he can stop any time he wants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Started a great book the other day - I couldn''t put it down. It''s called "The History of Glue"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jenny: How did the turtle cross the freeway? Forrest: I don''t know. Jenny: Take the ''r'' out of ''free''. Now, take the ''f'' out of ''way''. Forrest: There''s no ''f'' in way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Any horizontal surface is soon piled up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does a dog do in your backyard that you don''t want to step in? Dig a hole. If you step in the hole, you might twist your ankle!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m having trouble with this new hearing aid, said the man to his audiologist. "Really? Can you describe the symptoms?" "Sure. Homer is fat and yellow, Marge has blue hair..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Irishmen were sitting at a pub having beer and watching the brothel across the street. They saw a Baptist minister walk into the brothel, and one of them said, "Aye, ''tis a shame to see a man of the cloth goin'' bad." A bit later, they saw a Rabbi enter the brothel, and the other Irishman said, "Aye, ''tis a shame to see that the Jews are fallin'' victim to temptation as well." Then they see a Catholic priest enter the brothel, and one of the Irishmen said, "What a terrible pity ... one of the girls must be dying''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde walks into an electronic store. A saleswoman goes up to him and introduces a washing machine. Saleswoman: Sir, this machine in gurantee to do half of all your laundry. Blonde: That''s nice, I''ll take two.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor Simon is known throughout town as one of the best consultants on arthritis. He always has a waiting room full of people who need his advice and specialist treatment. One day, Betty, an elderly lady, slowly struggles into his waiting room. She is completely bent over and leans heavily on her walking stick. A chair is found for her. Eventually, her turn comes to go into Doctor Simon''s office. 15 minutes later, to everyone''s surprise, she comes briskly out of his room walking almost upright. She is holding her head high and has a smile on her face. A woman in the waiting room says to Betty, "It''s unbelievable, a miracle even. You walk in bent in half and now you walk out erect. What a fantastic doctor he is. Tell me, what did Doctor Simon do to you?" "Miracle, shmiracle," says Betty, "he just gave me a longer walking stick."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the thieves that broke into the United Jewish Appeal offices? They got away with over a million dollars in pledges!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Maurice has a business appointment, and he arrives a little early. The receptionist points to a comfortable easy chair and asks him to be seated for a while. Maurice settles down, picks up a glossy magazine opens it, and tries to read. However, he finds that he cannot concentrate because he is distracted due to a rumpus coming from behind one of the doors leading off the reception area. Maurice goes over to the receptionist and asks, "What''s going on in there?" She replies, "It''s a partners'' meeting." "But why are they shouting at each other?" Maurice asks. "It''s a battle of wits," she replies. Maurice asks: "Who is in there?" and she answers, "Horowits, Lebowits, Rabbinowits and Abramowits."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the old gentleman said to his wife, "Just think, honey, we''ve been married for 50 years." "Yeah," she replied, "Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together." "I know," the old man said, "We were probably sitting here naked as jaybirds fifty years ago." "Well," Granny snickered, "What do you say...should we get naked?" Where upon the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table. "You know, honey," the little old lady breathlessly replied, "My breasts are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago." "I wouldn''t be surprised," replied Gramps. "One''s in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Change the position of just one of the words below so that all the words are in an alphabetical sequence: llama phoenix hyena alligator beaver elephant tortoise antelope Antelope. Move it from the end to the beginning, the initial letters will then spell ALPHABET!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Put the characters C - D - I - M - L - V - X in the right order - but not alphabetical. I - V - X - L - C - D - M. Roman numerals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My brother, Julian, is a little simple. I recently asked him to buy me some ribbon for my daughter''s pretty pink bonnet. He went to the haberdashery shop for the required length but accidentally interchanged the feet and inches. When I measured the resulting ribbon I only had 30% of the length I required. How much ribbon did I originally ask for? I asked for 9 foot 2 inches (110 inches) and my brother brought me 2 foot 9 inches (33 inches).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which word is the odd one out? seventy brawl clover proper carrot swing change travel sacred stone Carrot. Each of the other words remains a real word if you remove the first and last letter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you complete this sentence using two words which are anagrams of each other? Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog _______. Luckily, he managed to complete the _______ manoeuvre without crashing. Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog barking. Luckily, he managed to complete the braking manoeuvre without crashing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? P E T S Step up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat Catch 22! (22 cats).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? B O N E S Broken bones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? lookkool Look both ways!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? pu Back up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Jimmy was at the mall with his mother when a man came walking toward them. Little Jimmy hopped up and down, laughed, pointed, and screamed, "Mommy! Look at that bowlegged man!" His mother was so embarrassed. "James, your manners are atrocious! You need some culture, young man!" For the next month Little Jimmy was forced to read Shakespeare every night. When his detention was finally over, his mother again took him to the same mall. Sure enough, the same bowlegged man came walking toward them. Had Little Jimmy learned anything from the great bard? Yes. This time, as the man approached, Little Jimmy cried out, "Hark! What manner of man is this me sees, who wears his balls in parentheses?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10=D in a M 10 decimeters in a meter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10=E on B 10 editors on braingle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? R U N Run down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? W O R K SEESAWS Overseas work!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? QQQQQQ No excuse. There is no X listed, but there are some Qs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat Copy cat!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME SCHEME Pyramid scheme!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28534);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? ED CROWD Over crowded: [CROWD over ED].', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28535);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? E E Y E E D D Cross eyed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28536);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 C A and 4 H A in a M M 1 carbon atom and 4 hydrogen atoms in a methane molecule!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28537);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Woman: I did something special today. Man: What? Woman: I rode on a hippo. Man: Surely you musn''t be kidding. Woman: Yes I''m not kidding and don''t call me Shirley.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28538);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a chicken''s favorite type of joke? The human who crossed the road!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28539);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Osama bin Laden and one of his followers were riding on a camel when they stopped at a small town. Bin Laden gets off the camel and lifts up its tail and looks at the camel''s butt. Just then a guy comes over and says, "What are you doing?" Osama replies, "About 2 miles back I heard someone say, ''Hey, look at the two assholes on that camel."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28540);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once, there was 3 Chinese people who wanted to go to America. Their names were Bu, Chu, and Fu. Since these names would sound awfully weird, Bu said, "I''ll change my name to Buck, adding ''ck'' to the end." Chu said, "Then I''ll become Chuck." After a long pause, Fu said, "I guess I''ll go back to China."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28541);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This Chinese man asks this guy what he does for a living. The guy says, ''I''m a comedian.'' The Chinese guy says ''No, u no camedien!'' The guy says, ''Yer, I am, honest.'' The Chinese guy says, ''No, you''re not, ploove it, change coror!'' (He says it like chameleon)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28542);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s Hitlers least favorite planet? ''Jewpiter''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28543);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you get 100 jews into a car? Throw a quarter in it. How do you get them out again? Tell them Hilter is driving.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28544);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a restaurant, and asks the waiter: Man: Waiter, how much is a cup of coffee? Waiter: 50 cents, sir. Man: How much are refills? Waiter: They are free. Man: That''s nice, I''ll have a refill, please.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28545);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know you have a queer Jew? He likes money more than girls.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28546);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the Jewish sports car? It stops on a dime, then picks it up', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28547);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the object of Jewish football? To get the quarter back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28548);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Jews walk around the desert for 40 years? They heard that someone dropped a quarter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28549);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens when a Jew with an erection walks into a wall? He breaks his nose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28550);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s faster than a speeding bullet? A jew with a coupon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28551);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Black Priest called? Holy Shit!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28552);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Father: "So you want to be my son-in-law, do you?" Boyfriend: "Not particularly, but since I want to marry your daughter, I haven''t much choice!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28553);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two executives were talking in the executive washroom. "My wife says I don''t display enough passion. Imagine the audacity! I think I''ll send her a memo!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28554);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Always keep several "get well" cards on the mantle. That way, if unexpected guests arrive they will think you have been sick and unable to clean.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28555);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The discovery that Bush''s resting heart rate is 43 has led some observers to speculate that this is the first time we''ve had a president with a heart rate that matches his IQ.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28556);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Asked by his teacher to compare three presidents Johnny thought for a moment and said: "Well, George Washington couldn''t tell a lie. Richard Nixon couldn''t tell the truth. And George W. Bush can''t tell the difference."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28557);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 sharks meet in the ocean. They talk about the people they recently have eaten. The first one says, "I swallowed the Ayatollah yesterday, but the guy had eaten so much garlic I still feel sick." The second shark says, "That''s nothing pal! I swallowed Boris Yeltsin last week and the old guy had so much vodka in him that I''m still drunk." The third shark laughs and said, "You lucky guys! I swallowed George W. Bush 3 weeks ago and the guy has so much air in his head, I still can''t dive!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28558);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into Starbucks. Man: I want a cup of coffee. Blond Waitress: Sure that will be $1.00 The man pays for the coffee, the blond then goes and measures a cup of coffee and brings it to the man, she dumps it all onto his table. Man: I wanted a cup of coffee, not this!! Blond: You wanted a "cup" of coffee, if you wanted a cup you could of asked for one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28559);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Chris and his friend Johnathan are standing outside of school one day. Johnathan finds Chris wearing his hair black and slicked down, with a purple stripe, with mascara and nail polish and a Korn t-shirt. Johnathan: So, Chris, what''s with the new outfit? Chris: I''m Emo. Johnathan: You are not Emo. Chris: Yeah I am, my life has no meaning and I listen to Korn; I''m extremely Emo. Johnathan: Did you watch Family Guy last night? Chris: Yeah. Johnathan: ... Chris: ...OH! Guess I''m not Emo. Johnathan: Yup. Chris: Can I still listen to Korn? Johnathan: Sure.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28560);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Israel''s economy is in a bad way, inflation is getting higher and immigrants are flooding in from all over the world. Problems, problems, problems, but what should they do? So the Knesset holds a special session to come up with a solution. After several hours of talk without progress, one member, Yitzhak, stands up and says, "Quiet everyone, I''ve got it, I''ve got the solution to all our problems. We''ll declare war on the United States." Everyone starts shouting at once. "You''re nuts! That''s crazy!" "Hear me out!" says Yitzhak. "We declare war, we lose; the United States does what she always does when she defeats a country. She rebuilds everything; our highways, airports, shipping ports, schools, hospitals, factories, and loans us money, and sends us food aid. Our problems would be over. "Sure," says Benny, another minister, "that''s if we lose - but what if we win?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28561);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two five year-olds, one Jewish, the other Catholic, are playing in a sandpit. Sean says to David, "Our priest knows more about things than your rabbi!" To which David replies, "Of course he does, you tell him everything."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28562);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The best way to end a war is to surrender.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28563);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is the worst joke ever. Give it no smiley face.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28564);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is the best joke ever! Give it a full smiley :) :) :) :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28565);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guys were sitting around a bar talking about things they bet on. A woman down at the end of the bar says, "I bet on things!" The bartender says, "Oh Yeah! What do you bet on?" Woman, "Most anything." Bartender, "Like what for instance?" Woman, "See that wall over there? I bet I can pee higher on that wall than you can!" Bartender, (Thinks about this for a minute) "I''ll take that bet! How much do you want to bet?" Woman, "You name your poison." Bartender, "I''ll bet you a thousand bucks." Woman, "Ok!" Bartender, "Ladies first." Woman, Pulls up her dress, pulls down her panties, leans back and pees. "Your turn," she replies. Bartender, Unzips his pants gets his sure tool out; gets ready to pee. Woman, "Hey....you got to do with NO HANDS!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28566);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A businessman boarded a plane and sat next to Hannah, an elegant woman wearing the largest and most stunning diamond ring he had ever seen. He asked her about it. "This is the Egoheimer diamond," Hannah said. "It''s beautiful, but there is a terrible curse that goes with it." "What''s the curse?" the man asked. "Mr Egoheimer."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28567);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A wig factory was broken into last night and a large quantity of wigs was stolen. Police are combing the area.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28568);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Harry and his neighbour Joe often borrowed things from each other. One day, Harry asked to borrow Joe''s ladder. Joe said, "Sorry Harry, I''ve lent it to my son." Remembering a saying that his grandma often used to tell him, Harry said, "Joe, you should never lend anything to your children because you''ll never get it back." Joe replied, "Don''t worry, it''s not my ladder - it''s my dad''s."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28569);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bill and Sarah were Londoners and were blessed with seven healthy children. After many months of discussion, they finally decided to move to New York. It should have been a simple enough move, but when they arrived, they had great difficulty finding a suitable apartment to live in. Although many were big enough, the landlords always seemed to object to such a large family living there. If only Bill wasn''t so honest about the size of his family! After several days of unsuccessful searching, Bill had an idea. He told Sarah to take the four younger children to visit the local cemetery while he went with the older three children to find an apartment. After looking for most of the morning, Bill found a place that was ideal. The landlord asked him, "How many children do you have?" Bill answered with a deep sigh, "Seven . . . but four are with their dear mother in the cemetery." He got the apartment!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28570);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pete and Mick were in court and standing before the judge. "Why can''t this case be settled out of court?" the judge asked. Pete looked up at the judge and said, "That''s what we were trying to do, your honour, when the police interfered."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28571);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you do not want to say you''re a guy, do not read this joke. (I do not know if this is funny) Instructions: At the end of each sentence say "I''m a Guy" You meet this hot girl. (I''m a Guy) You ask her out. (I''m a Guy) You take her to the movies. (I''m a Guy) You buy her popcorn. (I''m a Guy) She asks you over. (I''m a Guy) When she closes the door she whispers in your ear. I''M A GUY!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28572);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A masked man all of a sudden gave a beggar 1 million dollars. Man: Why did you give me so much money? Masked Robber: I steal from the rich and give to the poor. Man: I''m rich! Masked Robber: Okay give me all your money.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28573);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A girl named Zoey goes up to an artist and asks him to paint a picture of her face. "But Miss Zoey, if I paint a picture of your face then I can never be an artist again." "Why?" she asked. "Because if I look at your face too long, I will go blind."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28574);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man is bitten by a rabid dog he found wandering in his yard. Frantically, he rushes his computer and begins typing something. His neighbor walks in, and mentions to him that he need not worry, there is a cure for rabies. He replies, "I know that; I''m finding where George Bush is right now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28575);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman was unhappy with the way her laundry was done at the local Chinese Laundry, so she wrote a note and put it in the bag with the next collection of soiled clothes : "USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!" She got the clean laundry back, and was still dissatisfied with the results, so the following week she enclosed another note: "USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!" The Chinese laundryman became very annoyed, and when her clean laundry was delivered, it contained a note from him: "I USE PLENTY SOAP ON PANTIES!!!USE MORE PAPER ON ASS!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28576);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('16 more white keys than black keys on a piano.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28577);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8*4 = worlds in super mario brothers.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28578);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Beijing = Capital of China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28579);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8 = planets in solar system.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28580);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('X-axis + Y-axis + Z-axis + time = 4 dimensions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28581);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('7 + 7 + 7 = Jackpot!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28582);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3.6 = coulombs in a milliampere-hour.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28583);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Fibonacci sequence 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21... starts with two 1''s, and each term afterward is the sum of its two predecessors. Which one of the ten digits is the last to appear in the units position of a number in the Fibonacci sequence? Just write out their units digits, and mark the digits that appear for the first time. (1), 1, (2), (3), (5), (8), 3, 1, (4), 5, (9), 4, 3, (7), (0), ... Therefore, 6 is the last to appear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28584);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A A A A K = biggest 4 of a kind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28585);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Natrium chloride = table salt. "Natrium", from which the symbol "Na" derives, is the German word of "sodium".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28586);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? B BUSINESS BUSINESS A C K Getting back down to business!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28587);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? ABCDEFGHIJKMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ 2 Mistletoe! (Miss L two.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28588);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? RU[color=red]E[/color] Are you ready: [R U + red E].', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28589);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? DEINPTH VESTINIGATION In depth investigation!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28590);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? BALLBBALLABALLSBALLKBALLEBALLTBALL Basket Balls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28591);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? T T T U I U L P L I T I P O P S E S Tiptoe through the tulips!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28592);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? FORWARD Straightforward!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28593);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? ONALLE All in one!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28594);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? L L I H Uphill!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28595);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries and troubles, and lighten your burden." Boy: "That''s very kind of you, darling, but I don''t have any worries or troubles." Girl: "Yes, well, that''s because we aren''t married yet."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28596);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve been out of work for a while, so when I found a job sorting salt and pepper, I was most pleased. The only drawback is that it''s seasonal work.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28597);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('YOU''RE READING IT, YOU DOPE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28598);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('MADE YOU LOOK!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28599);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lesson 5: A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven''t got the energy." "Well, why don''t you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. They''re packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree. Moral of the story BullShit might get you to the top, but it won''t keep you there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28600);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Homework... something you go to school hours for and not do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28601);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? MTGG A hungry horse! MT (empty) GG (gee gee = horse).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28602);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher the following common phrase? AND ED Underhanded!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28603);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto. Pluto because it''s no longer a planet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28604);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the last thing that Abraham Lincoln did? He died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28605);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('8 protons, 8 neutrons and 8 electrons in an oxygen atom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28606);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? E D O W N D I S Upside down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28607);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? E N U T Tune up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28608);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The computer, the greatest invention in life even though it''s bad for you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28609);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Natalie had three very active young sons and they were quite a handful. One summer evening she was playing cowboys and Indians with them in her front garden when one of the boys "shot" her and shouted "Bang! You''re dead, Mum," so Natalie fell down. Her next door neighbour had been watching all this and when Natalie didn''t get up straight away, he ran over to see if she had been hurt in the fall. When the neighbour bent over her, Natalie opened one eye and said to him, "Shhh. Please don''t give me away, it''s the only chance I''ve had to have a rest all day".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28610);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Louis was talking to his friend Pete. "There''s nothing I wouldn''t do for my Becky," he said, "and there''s nothing Becky wouldn''t do for me, and that''s how we go through life - doing nothing for each other."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28611);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once a blonde decided that she wanted a kid. when she had it she couldnt decide what to name it. she asked around but no one had the right name. some people wanted huga butte and some wanted gatta pee pee. she went with ma hore', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28612);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a true story. I was texting my one friend, and we both get bored easy. This is part of our one convo. Him: Mew! I''m a kitty! Me: Woof! I''m a puppy! Him: Oink! I''m a cow! Me: Quack! I''m a zebra! Him: Bang! I''m a hoe! Me: Man, u got me beat on tht 1!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28613);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is stupid that she went hunting for whales in Ohio!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28614);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma''s breath is so bad, that when she entered the basement all the rats passed out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28615);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. What did God say after creating Adam A. I must be able to do better than that. Q. How do you get a man to do sit-ups? A. Put the remote control between his toes. Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A. A widow. Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm cells to fertilize one egg? A. They won''t stop to ask for directions. Q. Why does a penis have a hole in the end? A. So men can be open minded. Q. How are men and parking spots alike? A. Good ones are always taken. Free ones are mostly handicapped or extremely small. Q. What is the one thing that all men at single bars have in common? A. They are all married.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28616);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with a p and ends with the letters orn? Popcorn! What were you thinking? What starts with a f and ends with the letters uck? Firetruck! What were you thinking? What starts with a b and ends with the letters itch? Bewitch! What were you thinking?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28617);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Going home on the bus one evening a man was whiling away the time by doing a crossword. Three more men got on the bus at the next stop, and as they passed, one said, "If it''s any help to you, 7 Up is lemonade."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28618);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do this on a calculator! So here''s the story: a woman had 69 boobs which was too too too much. So she went to 51st street and the doctor took all the time he had and ate all the boobs and she became boobless! 69 boobs 222 much 51st street 6922251 X time 6922251 X 8 ate 6922251 =55378008 flip your calculator, and she became boobless!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28619);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Japanese doctor says, "Medicine in our country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him out looking for work in six weeks." A German doctor says, "That is nothing. We can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him out looking for work in four weeks." A British doctor says, "In my country medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have both of them out looking for work in four weeks." The Canadian doctor, not to be outdone, interjected, "You guys are way behind. We took a woman with no brains, sent her to Michigan where she became Governor, and now half the state is out looking for work."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28620);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there It''s me. This is not a joke. It''s me. This is not a joke. who? Grrrrrrrrrr...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28621);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Judi, did you ever try marriage counseling? Monika asked. "No," Judi snarled. "That stupid dickhead, shit-for-brains, moronic ex-husband of mind would have just told the counselor I was ''insensitive.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28622);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Try this on a friend: Every time you say something, tell the other to say the same thing and add "bait" at the end. Example: fish --> fish bait fish (fish bait) dolphin (dolphin bait) seal (seal bait) I master (I masturbate!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28623);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into a pet store, plants a bomb, and as he leaves, calls out, "You have one minute to get out!" At that, a tortoise at the back of the shop shouts, "You BASTARD!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28624);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One morning, Pete and Sally decided to go out for breakfast. The waitress at The Almond Tree told them that the special that morning was two eggs, tomatoes, mushrooms, hash browns and toast for $3.99. "That sounds good," said Sally, "but I don''t want the eggs." "OK," said the waitress, "but I will then have to charge you $4.50." "Why?" asked Pete, "it doesn''t make sense." "Because you will then in effect be ordering a la carte," the waitress replied. "Do you mean I''ll have to pay for not taking the eggs?" Sally asked. "Yes," replied the waitress. "OK then, I''ll take the special," says Sally. "How do you want your eggs done?" asked the waitress. "Raw and in the shell," Sally replied. At the end of the meal, Sally took the two eggs home.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28625);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary took her husband Bernie to see a psychiatrist for a check up. After examining him, the doctor took Mary to one side and said, "I have some very bad news for you. There is nothing I can do to help your husband. His mind has completely gone." "I''m not really surprised," Mary replied, "Bernie''s been giving me a piece of it every day for the last 50 years."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28626);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As part of a class project, the teacher had every student create a model rocket. When she was teaching them about how the rockets lift into the air, some kids seemed to be confused. She scolded them yelling, "It''s not that hard! It''s not rocket science!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28627);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the gay guy that put a Nicotine patch on his penis? He''s down to three butts a day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28628);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so old, she has toys made in America.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28629);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My bus driver for my school is always trying to say that he''s a gangster. But no one ever believes him so the other day I confronted him. So I asked, "are you really a gangster"? He sweated nervously, shaking and then he finally answered "of course I am I''m from the West Side". I did not feel that to be a sufficient answer so I then asked him "West Side of where"? He mumbled to himself a while and then answered me "West Side of Malibu".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28630);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mike, a 3-year-old, proudly walked into the kitchen of his house carrying a caterpillar. However, his mother was disgusted and wanted Mike to take it outside. "Mike, his mother is probably looking for him. Why don''t you take him outside?" said the mother. Three minutes later, Mike was back. "Look mommy!" he said, showing his mother two caterpillars. "I got his mommy too!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28631);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('5 = diagonals of a pentagon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28632);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9 = diagonals of a hexagon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28633);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('4 = 2+2', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28634);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('9 = tails of a fox.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28635);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('2 = special administrative regions in China. (Hong Kong and Macau)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28636);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dozen^2 = Gross.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28637);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('100 = decimeters in a decameter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28638);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('101 = keys on a computer keyboard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28639);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Jill went down the hill.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28640);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack = 11 in cards.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28641);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few months after his parents were divorced, Nick passed by his mom''s bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, "I need a man, I need a man!" Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times. One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her. Nick ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning, "Ohh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28642);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A few people wanted to ride a train. They brought the tickets and got on. Then they realized that the train didn''t have bathrooms. One passenger had to go and he was not going to get off because the train could leave any moment. So he stuck his butt out the window and was in the middle of his business when suddenly someone annouced,"Hey! The passenger with the big face, you can''t stick your head out the window and eat a huge piece of chocolate!!!!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28643);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yesterday my mother asked me to buy some stamps. Stamps, are available in 3p, 9p, 11p, 17p and 21p denominations. For three types of stamp I was asked to buy eight of each. For the other two types of stamp, I was asked to buy nine of each. Unfortunately I forgot which I was supposed to buy eight of and which to buy nine of. Luckily my mother had given me the exact money required to buy the stamps, 5.00 and the shopkeeper was able to give me the correct stamps. Which stamps did I buy? Eight lots of 11p, 17p and 21p and nine lots of 3p and 9p. The shopkeeper rightly figured that I required eight lots of each of the stamps, which came to 4.88, he also knew I required two more stamps which added up to the difference. QED.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28644);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Polly Perkins was after a talking parrot, so she went to the local pet shop in the hope of securing such a find. She was in luck. The shop assistant assured her that the parrot would learn and repeat any word or phrase it heard. Polly was delighted. However, a week later, the parrot still hadn''t spoken a word. Polly returned to the shop to complain, however, it appeared that the assistant was accurate in what he had said, and refused a refund. Why didn''t the parrot talk? The parrot was deaf and as such couldn''t repeat a single word it had heard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28645);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('HWAYETRDETIPZLHV OMNLTESOSHSUZEAE 32. Reading one letter from the top row and then one from the bottom row, the puzzle reads: ''How many letters does this puzzle have''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28646);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Recently, Snow White''s seven dwarfs met up with three of their friends and went to the cinema to see Bambi. From the clues below, can you determine the order in which they stood in the ticket queue? Grumpy was in front of Dopey. Stumpy was behind Sneezy and Doc. Doc was in front of Droopy and Happy. Sleepy was behind Stumpy, Smelly and Happy. Happy was in front of Sleepy, Smelly and Bashful. Bashful was behind Smelly, Droopy and Sleepy. Sneezy was in front of Dopey. Smelly was in front of Grumpy, Stumpy and Sneezy. Dopey was in front of Droopy. Sleepy was in front of Grumpy and Bashful. Dopey was behind Sneezy, Doc and Sleepy. Stumpy was in front of Dopey. Smelly was behind Doc. Doc Happy Smelly Sneezy Stumpy Sleepy Grumpy Dopey Droopy Bashful', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28647);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Peter decided to walk to the local waterfall, 10 miles away. At the moment he started, his dog ran off from his side and proceeded to the waterfall at a constant 8 miles per hour. As soon as the dog reached the waterfall, it started the return journey to Peter, keeping to the same speed. The dog continued this odd behaviour until Peter reached the waterfall. If Peter kept to a constant 4 miles per hour, how far did the dog run in total? 20 miles: Peter took 2.5 hours to reach the waterfall. The dog was always running at 8 miles per hour, therefore it ran 20 miles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28648);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? KCAB KCAB Back to back: [i.e. two back(s) - written back(wards)]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28649);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? EHCA Backache!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28650);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you decipher this phrase? box box box box box box box box box box box box Shit box box box box box box box box box box box box Shit in the box!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28651);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? STEP -> A step in the right direction!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28652);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is snippet of section A of the curious multiple-choice entrance exam into the exclusive puzzle club. 1. The first question with B as the correct answer is: A. 1 B. 4 C. 3 D. 2 2. The answer to Question 4 is: A. D B. A C. B D. C 3. The answer to Question 1 is: A. D B. C C. B D. A 4. The number of questions which have D as the correct answer is: A. 3 B. 2 C. 1 D. 0 5. The number of questions which have B as the correct answer is: A. 0 B. 2 C. 3 D. 1 1. C 2. D 3. B 4. C 5. B', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28653);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde couple were going on a vacation to the countryside visiting their relatives. As they soon reach their relatives'' home and go in, a blackout started. On and on the couple tried to find a source of light. Finally one of the blonde asks, "Hey, Mary, can you find anything?" Mary replies, "Nope, all I could find was this pair of flashlights."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28654);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('[Jesus signed on at 11:29 pm.] Jesus: Hello and welcome to the kingdom of heaven! Bob: Oh wow you mean I can come in? Jesus: All are welcome. Tell me what is the way you died? Bob: Well I was in a coma. Half my family wanted me on life support half didn''t. Jesus: I see... Bob: Oh crap brb [Bob went away at 11:31 pm.] Jesus: ? :( [Bob came back at 11:45 pm.] Bob: Sorry other half of the family Jesus: I see... now this is- Bob: brb [Bob went away at 11:47 pm.] Jesus: ... [Bob came back at 11:59 pm.] Bob: They just can''t make up their minds! Jesus: Clearly... Bob: So Heaven eh? Jesus: Yea it''s the most [Bob went away at 12:02 am] Jesus: Screw this. [Jesus signed out at 12:03 am.] [Bob came back at 12:17 am] Bob: Jesus they decided to let me die! Bob: Both sides agreed... Bob: Jesus? Bob: You there? [Satan signed in at 12:19 am]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28655);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Meteorologists - People who tell something wrong and still get paid.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28656);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Period- The thing at the end of a sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28657);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1st Stage (0-8)- You believe in Santa 2nd Stage (9-26)- You don''t believe in Santa 3rd Stage (27-45)- You are Santa 4th Stage (46-80)- You look like Santa', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28658);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Blonde explains to another blonde friend: "I failed the driving test. I entered the circle-way and the sign said "30" so I drove 30 times around." And the other one says: "You probably counted wrong."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28659);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem. 2. You''re adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelette. 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans. 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say. 5. Your using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says, "How''s my driving? call 1-800-***-****. 6. Everyone''s head looks like an invitation to batting practice. 7. You''re convinced there''s a God and he''s male. 8. You''re counting down the days until menopause. 9. You''re sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy. 10. The Ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28660);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You get mad when you don''t find a fly in your soup. 2. You buy out the supply of wart removal cream in your drugstore constantly. 3. French chefs are eyeing your legs and appear to be following you. 4. Bug lamps appear to you as a curse. 5. On applications, you list ''Pond'' as your home address. 6. Kermit is your idol. 7. You get mad whenever Miss Piggy makes a pass at Kermit. 8. Have seen the movie ''The Fly'' at least ten times. 9. You live in fear that some day you will wind up in a child''s aquarium. 10. France is the evil empire to you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28661);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10) Getting six hours of sleep is a privilege. 9) The sentence, "Honey, could you take his foot out of my pocket?" sounds normal. 8) You are used to doing everything one-handed. 7) The thought of your mother-in-law coming over for a few hours is a pleasant one. 6) The list of bodily fluids that disgust you has shortened, possibly to zero. 5) Your idea of romance is handholding. 4) You answer the question, "How are you?" with, "We''re fine." 3) You decide whether a shirt is wearable, not based on sweatiness, but based on how well the spit-up stains match the shirt''s main color. 2) You see a slender teenage girl walking down your street, and you think, "Hey, I wonder if I could interest her in . . . babysitting?" And the #1 way to tell that you''re a new dad: 1) It takes you two months to write and send out a simple Top-10-style joke email.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28662);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. If it''s wet make it dry. 9. If it''s dry make it wet. 8. Always ask for on-call pay before agreeing to overtime. 7. Never tell management what you are really thinking. 6. Never finish report with, "You have an easy assignment". 5. Never say. "This looks like a easy assignment". 4. Don''t expect nurses aids to do their job. 3. Don''t expect doctors to believe any thing you tell them. 2. If you don''t have enough time to do everything, take about 30 minutes to complain about it. 1. If it moves, rattles, shakes, falls down, or won''t stay in place, tape it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28663);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the moron stare at frozen orange juice? Because it said ''concentrate.'' Did you hear about the moron that got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize he could play it at night! What did the moron say when he put a quarter in the parking meter? Hey! Where is my gumball? Why did the moron tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? He didn''t want to wake the sleeping pills! How do you drown a moron? Put scratch-n-sniff stickers at the bottom of the pool! Why did the moron climb the glass wall? To see what was on the other side! Why can''t morons dial 911? They can''t find the 11 on the phone!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28664);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('But everybody looks funny naked! You woke me up for that? Did I mention the video camera? Hurry up! This room rents by the hour! Can you please pass me the remote control? Do you accept Visa? ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ On second thought, let''s turn off the lights. Do you get any premium movie channels? Try not to smear my make-up, will ya? But I just brushed my teeth . . . Smile, you''re on Candid Camera! Did you know the ceiling needs painting? Did I remember to take my pill? But my cat always sleeps on that pillow . . . Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed? You''re almost as good as my ex! Now I know why he/she dumped you . . . What are you planning to make for breakfast? I have a confession . . . You can cook too, right? Sorry about the name tags, I''m not very good with names. Don''t mind me . . . I always file my nails in bed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28665);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you complete this sentence using two words which are anagrams of each other? Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog _______. Luckily, he managed to complete the _______ manoeuvre without crashing. Whilst driving his car at a reckless speed, the driver was distracted by his dog barking. Luckily, he managed to complete the braking manoeuvre without crashing.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28666);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a machine which has four cog wheels in constant mesh. The largest cog has 72 teeth and the others have 36, 25 and 15 respectively. How many revolutions must the largest cog make before each of the cogs is back in its starting position? 25 revolutions.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28667);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Remove seven letters from this grid to leave two numbers. S F E V E I N L V E T E T F E R O S U R Simply remove ''SEVEN LETTERS'' and you are left with FIVE and FOUR: - F - - - I - - V - - E - F - - O - U R', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28668);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What starts with an E, ends with an E and usually contains only one letter? ENVELOPE!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28669);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was traveling from Chesterton to Newcastle recently when I came across a sign which had fallen off its post at the crossroads. It was marked to Newcastle, Chesterton, Knutton and Silverdale. Unfortunately I didn''t know which road to take to Newcastle and had hoped the sign would help. Luckily, I had a great idea which helped me put the sign back up pointing correctly to Newcastle. What was my idea? I simply pointed Chesterton back the way I had come and this left the sign in its correct orientation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28670);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which word is the odd one out: football polo badminton baseball golf tennis cricket billiards rugby Badminton. This is the only sport which does not use a ball, it uses a shuttlecock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28671);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can You Decipher This Phrase? LASE There are two possible answers. Argon laser: the ''R'' has gone. Or, jumble sale: the letters of sale are jumbled.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28672);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a recent expedition, three intrepid adventurers were left stranded in the middle of the desert with only a crate full of apples. During the night, Alan woke up and decided to hide his share of the apples, one-third, then promptly fell asleep again. Brian woke up shortly after and also decided to hide a third of the remaining apples and he also dozed back to sleep. Finally, Charlie woke up and seeing the others were asleep, took a third of what was left. Of course none of the adventurers knew of the other''s antics, so, in the morning, they shared the remaining apples, each receiving sixteen. How many apples were in the crate originally? 162 apples. Alan hid 54, leaving 108. Brain hid 36, leaving 72. Charlie hid 24, leaving 48. 48 apples were then available to share in the morning.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28673);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Team has no "I" in it, but it does have a "M" and "E" in it, making "me".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28674);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day little Billy went screaming to his mom, "Mommy! Mommy! Theres a shrimp stuck between grandma''s legs!" His mother, intruiged by this, brought Billy to grandma, who was sleeping on the bed with her legs apart. The mother looked and laughed and said, "Why, that''s not a shrimp! That''s her privates, a vagina!" Billy smiled and said, "Really? It sure tastes like shrimp..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28675);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a collection of a few of the Redneck lines I''ve heard (and can remember) over the years . . . You know you''re a redneck when: You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos. Your wife weighs more than your refrigerator. Your shopping list only has beer on it. The biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you''ll wear to the 4-H Fair. You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard. You move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow. You go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift. You mow your lawn and find a car. Your "pet" eats more than you. You can spit without opening your mouth. You refer to sixth grade as "your senior year". You refer Chuck Norris as: God, Santa Claus, and the Harvest Man.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28676);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Managed to remember some MORE Redneck lines while hearing a couple more. You know you''re a redneck when: You lost your virginity at the age of 11. You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut. Taking a dip has nothing to do with water. There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog. You take a fishing pole to Sea World. The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car. Your TV is a bag of manure on fire. Your "family reunion" was at the NRA convention. Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap. You''ve shot somebody over a mall parking space. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. Making a chocolate cake has nothing to do with chocolate. You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28677);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now here''s a classic joke that''s been told by many kids, that should be very well known . . . anyway, after you read this, it''s funny to try it on someone After every statement, say, "Behind the rock" 1. Billy went 2. He took off his shoes 3. He took off his socks 4. He took off his shirt 5. He took off his pants 6. He took off his undies 7. He made out with someone 8. Where were you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28678);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Politically correct word for dead: Living Impaired', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28679);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Was there any doubt?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28680);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I wonder if my friend, Kent as submitted a joke about me saying how brave I am.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28681);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Would you like some chocolate ice cream and lemonade? Yes? Ok! *shits* chocolate ice cream and *pisses* lemonade!that would be $5.00', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28682);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a nearly-new television for sale the other day. It has a 42-inch plasma screen, and I bought it for $50. The only thing wrong was that there was no volume control - but at that price, I couldn''t turn it down!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28683);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A tramp knocked on the door of a house. "What do you want?" said the owner. "Can you spare some money to help a poor person?" said the beggar. As soon he was given a few coins and told to go on his way, the beggar complained, "Your son gave me twice as much when I called here last week." "Well, my son can afford to," said the owner, "he has a very rich father."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28684);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Elsie walked into a print lab to have a photo of her deceased husband copied and retouched. She said to the technician, "I have always hated the hat that my husband is wearing in the photo. Could you please retouch the hat out?" "Of course," said the technician; "what colour hair did your husband have?" "When you take the hat off, you''ll see," she said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28685);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, I was walking my dog around my building...on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights. Not me, I''m afraid of widths. I had a dog once. I spilled spot remover on him, and now he''s gone. I put contact lenses in my dog''s eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. I bought a dog the other day... I named him Stay. It''s fun to call him... "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing. He''s an East German Shepherd.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28686);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I want to kick the guy who invented the snooze button...then five minutes later, I''ll kick him again. Thanks Andrew!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28687);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Brother: How long is a strong? Big Sister: Huh? Little Brother: Well, I''ve heard of a week...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28688);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Conserve water and electricity, shower with a steamy hot friend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28689);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde''s boyfriend, planning to stop at the bakery says, "I''m going to go pick up a blondie. I want a smoking hot fresh one." The blonde replies, "Well, then we''re over. Go ahead and get a new girlfriend. A nice blondie!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28690);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, she cut herself and bled gravy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28691);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s lips are so big, she made Angelina Jolie jealous!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28692);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Philip is telling his friends about his recent divorce. "Yes, it''s true. Sylvie divorced me for religious reasons. She worshipped money and I didn''t have any."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28693);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s breath smells so bad, her teeth duck when she yawns!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28694);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A recent immigrant had just completed a training course titled, ''Improve your English'' and was taking an oral exam. The examiner asked him to spell ''cultivate.'' Jacob spelled it correctly. The examiner then asked Jacob to use the word ''cultivate'' in a sentence. Jacob thought about it for a while, then replied, "Last winter, on a very cold day, I was waiting for the bus but it was too cultivate so I walked home."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28695);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly, you can press her face in some dough and make gorilla cookies!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28696);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28697);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly the plastic surgeon sued her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28698);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly she made a mime scream.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28699);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so ugly they renamed "Halloween" "Yo-momma-ween".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28700);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jack and Joe are in a diner where there''s a computer who gives advice to the people in the diner. Jack starts talking about how the two are going to graduate from high school when a young boy walks in. He explains his problem to the computer, which gladly offers him advice. The boy walks out happily. The computer comes over to Jack and Joe. Joe asks, "Hey, how come you never help us with our problems?" The computer answers, "I''m just a computer. I''m not a miracle maker."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28701);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You perverts..', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28702);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What color is red? True or false?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28703);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a man who couldn''t speak correctly. He wanted to go buy some stuff for his wife. First, he needed to buy a bucket. "Excuse me sir, can I buy a fuck-it?" the man asked. The clerk said, "You mean a bucket?" "Yes, that''s what I said, a fuck-it." While the man was walking he found some gum. "Oh look, bum." He took the gum and walked to the pet store. He wanted to buy a cocker spaniel. "Excuse me sir, can I buy a cock-and-spank-it?" "Sure, but you do mean a cocker spaniel?" "Yes, that''s what I said, a cock-and-spank-it." As the man was walking, and his dog ran away. The man asked a stranger, "Excuse me miss, can you hold my bum and fuck-it, while I get my cock-and-spank-it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28704);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A little boy walks into a ice cream parlor to buy ice cream. Worker: Hello little boy, can I help you? Little boy: Yes, I want some chocolate ice cream, please. Worker: Sorry, we''re out of choclate. Little boy: Ok, I''ll have some...........chocolate. Worker: Once again, we''re out of chocolate, pick another flavor. Little boy: Hm................ I like chocolate! Worker thinks to himself. Worker: So boy, do you want some chocolate? Little boy: But there is no freakin chocolate! Worker: Exactly!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28705);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I went for a 5 mile run today. 2 laps around yo mum!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28706);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lady goes to a menswear shop to buy clothes for her husband. When she finds the clothes she likes she goes up to the counter and says, "I would like to buy these please." The man at the counter says, "Certainly, but you must sign this form." The lady says "Why?" but the man ignores her. The form reads as follows: Title: _____ Full Name: _______________________ She fills it in like this: Title: Ms Full Name: Jenny Hollows The man at the counter asks, "What does the ''Ms'' mean? Does it mean you are divorced?" and the woman responds with, "It is non specific. It is none of your business if I am divorced or not!" The man says "Wow! Men should get one like that!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28707);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tomorrow is a boiling hot day, at 10 degrees Fahrenheit. The day after that is the same temperature, as well as the next and the next. Won''t these temperatures ever cool down?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28708);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ciao amico, desidero comprare un mazzo di banane. "Il compagno spiacente, questo un farmacista."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28709);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tommy was dying. His wife was with him, standing next to his bed. As he was drawing his last few breaths, he gasped, "Helen, I have one last request." "Of course, Tommy, what is it?" Helen asked softly. "Six months after I die," he said, "I want you to marry Louis." "But I thought you hated Louis," said Helen. With his final breath, Tommy said, "I do."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28710);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bernie has been ill for some months and then suddenly dies. As is the custom, his wife Sadie puts an advert in the ''deaths'' section of the Chronicle, but this advert is slightly unusual it states that Bernie died of gonorrhoea. Immediately, a close friend of Bernie rings Sadie to complain. "Sadie," he says, "you know full well that Bernie died of diarrhoea, not gonorrhoea, so why did you word the advert incorrectly?" "I looked after Bernie day and night for over 3 months," replies Sadie, "so of course I know he died of diarrhoea, but I thought it would be better for people to remember Bernie as a great lover rather than the big sh*t he was."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28711);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When my pap was younger, his family didn''t have much money. One year for Christmas, his mother cut a hole in the front of his underwear so he would have something to play with.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28712);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok, now the last time I did this, I got a lot of comments saying that there''s no point, and they only submit things they think is funny and blah blah blah. Well, anyways, I''m planning to do this.... again.. and by the way, I think it''d be extremely funny. Everyone, please give this a full smiley. Sooner or later, this is going to become the highest rated "joke". I figured it''d be extremely funny if the highest rated joke, wasn''t even a joke at all... Thanks a billion for your cooperation!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28713);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('knock knock, who''s there animal animal who? animal i kin git lots of stuff iffn i have ta money', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28714);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes to the store with a list of things he needs to buy for his wife, and as he is going in he sees a child with free kittens. He continues and buys the things on the list. On the way out he sees the free kittens again and no-one has taken any. So he takes his things to his car, comes backs and takes the SIX kittens that are left. He goes home brings in the groceries and then the six kittens. when his wife sees the six kittens she says "Why do you have six kittens, six kittens!" Husband calmly replys, "Six kittens hell, those are six pale bearers for your dead pussy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28715);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Inside i could hear a lot of bass noise pumping. I went outside to see what it was and i found out it was a drummer practicing. I went inside and told my family that the player made a mistake and said dammit. My brother said "I wonder which band it was?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28716);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a bar on a slow night and sat down. After a few minutes, the bartender asked him if he wanted a drink. He replied, "No thanks. I don''t drink. I tried it once, but I didn''t like it." So the bartender said, "Well, would you like a cigarette?" But the man said, "No thanks. I don''t smoke. I tried it once, but I didn''t like it." The bartender asked him if he''d like to play a game of pool, and again the man said, "No thanks. I don''t like pool. I tried it once, but I didn''t like it. As a matter of fact, I wouldn''t be here at all, but I''m waiting for my son." The bartender said, "Your only son, I''m guessing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28717);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two people were at a bar resting when one said, "I wish I was God." The other said, "Are you mad?" And the other says, "How could you say such a thing?" and the reply is, "I don''t want to have to lose all of Buddha''s fat!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28718);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m a nobody and nobody is perfect - therefore, I am perfect.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28719);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Now, my brother ALWAYS daydreams. He just can''t help it. He also likes getting me to feel bad. I just got a new IPod and my brother says whenever I put it in my ears that i have turned into a zombie. When we were out for a bike ride down through the park he wouldn''t stay left (We live in the southern hemisphere) and so other people on the track had to move to the right to get past. I screamed out to him to go left when i had my IPod in and he said "What." I said "Left, L-E-F-T. Gosh you can''t hear anything when you daydream." And his response was "No you can''t hear anything with your IPod in, I know what you said, you said FELT." I wonder who is the one that can''t hear?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28720);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Boo Boo who? I don''t know, but stop your crying!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28721);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Saint Peter asked the new arrival, "And what bad things did you do while you were on Earth?" The man thought a moment. "Well, I smoked marijuana, but you shouldn''t hold that against me because I didn''t inhale, and I had some extra-marital sex, but you shouldn''t hold that against me because I didn''t technically have "sexual relations". I lied some, but you shouldn''t hold that against me because I never committed perjury." Saint Peter looked concerned. "Okay, here''s the deal," said Saint Peter. "We''ll send you someplace very hot, but we won''t call it ''Hell''. You''ll be there for an indefinite time, but we won''t call it ''eternity,'' and you don''t need to ''abandon all hope'' upon entering, but don''t hold your breath waiting for it to freeze over!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28722);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was a village, it was powerful and had the strongest warriors, one day, a tourist goes to them and says they were cowards, they yelled and beat him, but finally, the tourist said, "This book says that the Paccachu are selfish people who steal, and are cannibals." The villagers looking at the book scream and run around the village. One man however, looks at the book and laughs. The man stays where he is and doesn''t panic like his fellow village. The tourist, finally gathering enough courage asks him, "How come your not scared?" The man smirks and replies, "I can''t read."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28723);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Early one morning, the milkman was doing his rounds. He stopped at a house to ask for his monthly fee, only to find a small boy at the door slurping from a beer bottle, smoking a Havana cigar, and with his arm around what appeared to be a call-girl. Surprised, the milkman asked the boy if his parents were home. "Does it fucking look like it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28724);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman''s head. "Yech!" says the woman. "Get some toilet paper." "What for?" says the man. "He must be half-a-mile away by now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28725);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: John, where are the Great Plains? John: At the airport.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28726);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One there was a wrestler in a very, very light weight wrestling match. He only weighed 135 pounds and his opponent even less than that. He was just about to wrestle that day when his coach dragged him off the ring. "I need to speak with him," the coach called. "Why''d you take me out?" asked the wrestler, nervous. "What did I do?" "Calm down. I don''t think you''re fit to beat your opponent." "Yeah, well, I doubt it, Coach. I could carry that guy in the palm of my hand. He only weighs 85 pounds, maybe 90." "Yes, but he has a lot of muscle!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28727);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a dog in the sun? A Hot Dog!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28728);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was a blond''s birthday, and to celebrate, he took his girlfriend out on a date; he dressed very nicely, in a tuxedo, sharp tie, and some nice soft pants. He went to his girlfriend, and said, "Do you have anything to say to me?" His girlfriend also a blonde, says, "Yeah, what up with the tie?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28729);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Melvyn and Max were left quite a large plot of land by their rich father. However, this caused the two sons much grief. For months they argued long and hard over how the land should be divided between them. The solution just wasn''t that simple, so they took the problem to their priest. "Father," said Melvyn, "can you please help us solve our problem?" As soon as he had heard their case, Father Murphy said, "Come back tomorrow and we''ll talk again." The next day, Melvyn and Max returned and the priest gave them his solution. He gave Max a coin and said, "You can toss the coin." "And you," said Father Murphy to Melvyn, "can call it, heads or tails. Whoever wins the toss will divide the land." "But that won''t work," said Max, "we''ll be right back from where we started." "But not," said Father Murphy, "if the one who wins the toss divides the land and the other one gets first choice!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28730);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Willy, full of hell, Threw his sister in the well. Their mother said when drawing water, "It''s so hard to raise a daughter."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28731);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A child named Bob was running through the neighbor''s garden. "Hey!" shouted the neighbor, "I thought I told you not to let me catch you here again!" "Right!" replied the boy, "and you haven''t caught me yet!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28732);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jacky walked into his house from school crying; his mom saw him and said, "What''s wrong, Jacky?" Jacky replied, "I lost a quarter at school!" "There, there," replied his mother, "here''s another," handing him a quarter. Jacky cries even louder; this time his mother, upset, says, "What''s the matter now?" Jacky says, "I wish I said I lost a dollar!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28733);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy walks home an hour late to class, the teacher asks him, "Why are you so late?" The boy replies, "I stopped two boys from beating each other up." The teacher says, "That''s very nice; how did you do that?" The boy says, "I beat them both up!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28734);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boss of a computer company walked up to one of his workers. "You''re fired!" exclaimed the boss. "I didn''t do anything!" replied the confused worker. The boss, happy with his answer, says, "I know. That''s why you''re fired!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28735);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a modern art museum, he sees a piece of art, and says, "Look how ugly that is, the nose is all out of shape, and look at those arms, so small and weak, I bet the person who created this is a wimp!" A security guard nearby says, "Sir, that''s a mirror."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28736);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every day, Mr. Koch has to cross the river by ferry in order to get to work. Waking up late one morning, he dressed quickly, ran out the door and raced to the dock. The boat was several yards away, and stepping back and taking a mighty leap, Mr. Koch landed with a crash on the deck. "Made it!" he cried triumphantly. "So?" said one of the passengers, "What was the rush? The boat is coming in."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28737);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mr. Lwin was staring at the cage in the zoo, watching the great cat pace back and forth. "I wonder what the tiger would say if it could talk," he said to the zookeeper. The zookeeper replied, "It would probably say, ''Hey dummy, I''m a cheetah!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28738);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher said to the cooking class. "Tell me: what is the most important thing to put in a chocolate cake?" Faith quickly replied, "Your teeth!" The teacher said, "No, the ingredients." After correcting Faith, the cooking teacher said, "Who can tell me the best way to keep yogurt from spoiling?" Faith answered, "By eating it!."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28739);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, says Jim, "this match won''t light!" "Strange," says Ned,. "It worked okay this morning."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28740);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that when I wanted to take her picture I had to back up so far that I ended up in China.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28741);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two old pilot friends in the Air Force were talking about the day''s activities: Jenkins (first pilot): Did you hear? Captain Smith jumped out of a B-1 bomber, without a parachute, and he wasn''t hurt! Randy (Second Pilot): That''s impossible! The fall would have killed him! Jenkins (shakes his head): The bomber hadn''t taken off yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28742);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three men stranded on an island with nothing to eat, but a bowl of mac n cheese. The first guy says, "I have an idea, lets all swim to the other side and the first one there gets the bowl of mac n cheese". They all tie so the second guy says, "I have an idea, lets all swim back and the first one back gets the bowl of mac n cheese". They all tie again and the third guy says, "I have an idea, lets all go to sleep and the one with the best dream gets the bowl of mac n cheese". The next morning the first guy says, "I dreamed I ate all the mac n cheese in the world". The second guy says, "I dreamed I ate the bowl of mac n cheese". The third guy says, "Yankee Doodle went to town ridin on a pony while you dummies were asleep I ate the bowl of macaroni".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28743);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walked into a caf and he said, "Could I have a breakfast". The cafe owner said, "Certainly, sir". He said, "But could you do it my way". The owner says, "What''s your way". He says, "I want a fried egg that''s been over-cooked so it''s got a rubbery texture so I can bounce it up and down on the floor, I want bacon that''s so brittle that when I stab my fork in it it springs around the room, I want baked beans that are cold in the middle, hot on the outside, I also want fried bread that''s dripping in grease with no crispy bits". The owner says, "I haven''t got time to do all that". The man says, "Well, you f*cking found time yesterday!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28744);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Definition of alien-people from another country.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28745);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Route 66 says to the country road: Hey, man, you straight? Country road says: Heck no, I''m a byway!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28746);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newcomer in town goes to a bar, the bar manager notices he is new and says, "Sir, you''re new, and when you''re new, you have to drink a whole barrel of beer, then fix the crocodile''s sore tooth, then you give that nice lady right there a hug, or you can''t come to this bar again!" The newcomers says, "That''s ridiculous!" and leaves the bar. A couple minutes later, he comes back, he drinks the barrel of beer, then he goes into the backyard. After a couple screams of bloody murder, screeches, cries of pain, the newcomer returns all bloody and bruised. Then he goes up to the manager and says, "Okay, where''s the girl with the sore tooth?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28747);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was reading an article yesterday that was talking about the University of Michigan. They referred to it as MU. This got me to thinking.... What do they call the University of Florida?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28748);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s a Mexican called when he''s covered in dirt? A churro', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28749);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple who is having problems in their marriage decide to go on a talk show. The wife complains that her husband does not listen to her and is ungrateful. She blames this on her husband''s career. The host asks the man, "Has being in politics had any affect on your sex life?" Bill Clinton replies, "Mine''s great, how''s yours honey?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28750);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Are you sick of those stains on your carpet, the mess in the bathroom and kitchen? Are you worried that you will have to spend tons of money just to clean up what your loved one leaves behind? Now, you don''t have to worry because you can have your very own.......................... new personalized husband! The following is a list of the commands this product will perform: 1.It will clean up after itself. 2.It will stay out of your way. 3.It will keep the toilet seat down. 4.It will not talk back. 5.Worried about your kids? This baby can take care of anything! Does this sound too good to be true? We forgot to mention... It has an on/off switch! Note: This product sold for a limited time only. Batteries not included.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28751);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What do you get when you cross an anteater and a monkey? A: I haven''t a goddamn clue.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28752);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If ham is Canadian bacon, then what the heck do you Canadians call bacon?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28753);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I always find myself arguing with my sister over who got up earliest in the morning. It''s ridiculous. I have to remind myself that I really don''t care. Usually this is what happens... (sister walks into the room) Her: Hey. What time did you get up this morning? Me: Um...around 9:00. Her: Oh. I woke up at 7:30. Me: Well, I woke up at 6 and didn''t get back to sleep until 8:00. It always takes me a while to get back to sleep... Her: Yeah, I got up a bunch of times this morning. The dog woke me up. Me: (under my breath) Dammit.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28754);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One professor says your IQ measures how much you know. A scientist says your IQ measures how much information you are capable of learning. All I want to know is how long it will take me to get with your sister. I mean DAMN!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28755);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('With iPhone, dialing contacts is a snap. Let''s say you wanted to contact your ex-girlfriend to let her know how badly she''s hurt you. Simply press her name, and the call is dialed. "Dammit, Rick, stop calling me!" Then, when another call comes in, simply place that call on hold and answer the second one. "This is Detective Hanson, from the Bay Area Police Department." To block the call, simply press ignore. iPhone is also the best iPod ever made. With it, you can listen to the song that was playing when she said you''d be together forever. *music* Then, you can use Google maps to locate the street where she''s moved away to. Simply touch the traffic button and iPhone tells you the best route to take to propose to her. Again, Apple''s iPhone, a revolutionary portable device that never leaves your side. And never sleeps with your cousin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28756);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('10. Horton Hears a Ho 9. National Pleasure 2: Book of Secretions 8. I Am Legend...In Bed 7. The Suck It List 6. I Know Who Drilled Me 5. Scat-Atouille 4. Gush Hour 3 3. No Country for Old Balls 2. Alvin in the Chipmunks 1. Iron Man', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28757);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('NFL - National Farting Legends BC - Before Comedy BAD - Being A Dumbass BEG - Big Evil Grin BF - Begging Forgiveness AA - Admirable Alcoholics NASA - Never Associate Sex with Aircrafts AAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse ATLA - Another Three Letter Acronym BANANA - Being A Nuisance And Never Apologizing BFI - Bunch of F***ing Idiots BICBW - But I Could Be Wrong (used rarely) BMTIPG - Brilliant Minds Think In Parallel Gutters BSOD - Blue Screen Of Death CADET - Can''t Add, Doesn''t Even Try COTFLGOHAHA - Crawling On The Floor Laughing Guts Out And Having A Heart Attack (why don''t we see this more often?) CPF - Can Pigs Fly? (well can they???) CRAFT - Can''t Remember A F***ing Thing CRS - Can''t Remember S*** CYA - Cover Your Ass CUNT - Computer User Non-Technical and did you know... ACRONYM - Abbreviated Coded Rendition Of Name Yielding Meaning AKA Always Creating Random Odd Nicknames You Memorize', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28758);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher told one kid, "You''re going to flunk this subject because you haven''t finished your homework assignments." The kid said, "Good. I flunked all the other ones because I''m stupid."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28759);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what big ears you have!" Wolf: "All the better to hear you with." Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what big eyes you have!" Wolf: "All the better to see you with." Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what big hands you have!" Wolf: "All the better to grab you with!" Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what a horribly big mouth you have!" Wolf: "All the better to eat you with!" Little Red Riding Hood: "Oh, grandmother, what a big dick you have!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28760);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have no soul. yes, Thats why I''m an asshole! I have somethin'' up my ass and no, that ain''t no mole. I pick on everybody ''cause I''m a nobody. My girlfriend left me. Sometimes I go crazy and go out in the streets and yell "COME FUCK ME!" Everyone asks me, "Hey, whats up your ass!".Yeah I know I''ve sucked a lot of ass. The juices, oh, they are delicious as they come to pass. As I sit behind my computer and write jokes, my mother chokes On my cock. And I hear a knock. And who is it? Its my friend, a Gay. So, I send my mother away. I do it hardcore. I wont let him go ''til his ass is sore Even though my dick is inches-four. I have nothing to do ''cept suck on my dirty socks ''cause I am such a butt-fucker, my mother traps me in my room with heavy locks. Yes, thats me, I am KENTROCKS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28761);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat she turned her Nike Shox into "Shocked Nikes"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28762);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick''s day? A. Regular Rocks are too heavy!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28763);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a blonde went to a store and saw Donuts that were sugar free, so she grabbed them and walked out of the store without paying. Security stopped her and asked, "Excuse me miss, but what do you think you are doing?" She said "Duh...I''m taking the free Sugar donuts!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28764);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a blonde in Wal-mart and she went up to a man. The blonde said, "Hi! Do you know what IDK means?" The man said, "I don''t know." Then the blonde said, "DARN! Nobody knows!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28765);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were three men at a bar. One of them ducked and the other two fell down because they hit the bar.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28766);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a coconut tree and 4 animals. 1. A Elephant 2. A Monkey 3. A Tiger 4. A Mouse Which one of these animals is going to climb up the tree to get the banana? NONE! "There was a COCONUT TREE" "...the tree to get the BANANA"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28767);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!BLAH!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28768);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Liners', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28769);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m so good that even yo momma cheers for me!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28770);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many Clowns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Paid Clowns - 5 Boys in school - 1000', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28771);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Daddy, there''s a man knocking on the door with a beard! "No wonder I didn''t hear him!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28772);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They''re fat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28773);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do you go to a black person''s yard sale? To get your stuff back!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28774);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('....................................................................................................................................................................................................................;).....................................................................................................................................................................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28775);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- I want to give you something. - That''s what your mom said to me last night.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28776);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- What''s your dad doing? - Your mom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28777);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- What do you wanna do next? - Your mom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28778);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- I told you to knock before you enter my room! - Your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28779);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (NULL, '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28780);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- What did you have for dinner last night? - Your mom. - ...and for dessert? - Your mom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28781);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Painter: "Y''are a dog." Apemantus: "Thy mother''s of my generation. What''s she, if I be a dog?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28782);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Demetrius: "Villain, what hast thou done?" Aaron: "That which thou canst not undo." Chiron: "Thou hast undone our mother." Aaron: "Villain, I have done thy mother."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28783);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('See that X? That''s your mum that is.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28784);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? A. The same as the number of men, you sexist bastard!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28785);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep an idiot in suspense? I''ll tell you tomorrow!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28786);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Kerryman emigrated from Ireland to England, thereby increasing the average IQ of both countries.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28787);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do mathematicians like national parks? Because of the natural logs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28788);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s purple and commutes? An Abelian grape.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28789);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a really dramatic woman and a small man. The small man worked at a ballroom. The woman got dressed up all fancy and went to the ballroom. She went up to the man and said, "I hope there is something between us! And the little man said, "Me too! A continent!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28790);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Gene Pitney dies, and his widow is told that the coffin would take a week if it was made from Oak - but only 24 hours from Balsa!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28791);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I heard you tried to apply to work at a candy store. But they turned you down saying they already had enough air heads. Were you fat when you were born? Cause i think it all went straight to your head. Most people think outside the box. You still haven''t figured out how to get in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28792);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('People from Mensa are said to understand any jokes without the need of any explaination. Meaning Mensans will be able to understand this joke here, though it is limpid that there aren''t any to be contemplated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28793);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The three wise men went to visit Jesus right after he was born. One wise man was extremely tall. He hit his head on the top of the door frame and said, ''''Jesus Christ!'''' Joseph looked at Mary and said ''''Write that down -- that''s way better than Clyde!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28794);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a doctor''s office. He has a sausage coming out of his ear, a waffle coming out of his nose, and bacon coming out of his other ear. He says worriedly, "Doc, what''s wrong with me?" The doctor replies, "You''re not eating properly."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28795);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1) Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people - whether they are employed or not. 2) When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish. 3) If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22. 4) It''s easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down. 5) Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving. 6) Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do. 7) The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris. 8) Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: "Enter Password Now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28796);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop." Customer: "OK." Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?" Customer: "No." Tech Support: "OK. Right-click again. So you see a pop-up menu?" Customer: "No." Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?" Customer: "Sure. You told me to write ''click'' and I wrote ''click''." _____________________________________________ Tech Support: "OK. In the bottom left-hand side of the screen, can you see the ''OK'' button displayed?" Customer: "Wow! How can you see my screen from there?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28797);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it''s raining!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28798);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was walking through Beverly Hills selling door to door what he claimed to be the "Magic Elixir of Life". Of course, the police arrested him and ran a computer check of him. They found the man had quite a long record of such dealings. He was first arrested for that type of crime in 1660.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28799);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken do a poo right in front of a hole on a really busy footpath? Because he wanted people to slip on the poo and fall in the hole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28800);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a chicken in a shell suit? An egg!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28801);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a chicken? A chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28802);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why can''t you go to the bathroom at a Beatles concert? There''s no John.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28803);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does PMS stand for? Potential Murder Suspect', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28804);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Alaska Alaska who? Alaska one more time, open the door', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28805);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WARNING:DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU WANT TO LIVE ANYMORE OR EAT OR GO POTTY! A person named tommy had a wife named heather. Whenever Heather came home, She would bring something disguisting. When heather died in a war, Tommy was sad. He said to himself, I MUST DIE IN A TOILET INSTEAD!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28806);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Well both the girl and the emo bleed blood and both of them are annoying as hell in the process.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28807);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A vertical expression of a horizontal desire.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28808);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a man was sitting on a toilet with his solar power laptop, then his laptop fell in the toilet. He ran out of the bathroom screaming. The next person sat down to use the toilet. When he was done, he stood up looked at the toilet and screamed out of the bathroom. All the people in the bathroom ran out of the bathroom screaming.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28809);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Both are attractive cost about $400 for 2 or 12 hours of fun. But right when you''re satisfied you get addicted to them, And keep wasting money replacing em.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28810);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If winners never quit, and quitters never win... Who was the fool who said, "Quit while you''re ahead".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28811);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, doctor. I think I need glasses. You sure do, sir. This is a flower shop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28812);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ok Umm Uhh, Ahhh! Oh well, I just forgot what I was gonna say. Man I''m stupid', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28813);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid named Ron lost his mom and dad. He went to the hospital to say, "I wanna baby! Waaaaaaaaaaa!" The nurse said, "You''re a male! Males don''t have babies! And you''re too young!" He died by biting his finger really hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28814);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I plan to be spontaneous - tomorrow. You know, if I looked like you, then I''d probably be plastering make-up on, too. You looked in a mirror lately? You''re just jealous - weighing 10 stone is a big achievement. You remind me of a person I once knew. He was called the Hulk. If you are wondering why I''m napping, it''s because you always want us to be wide awake. If I nap now, I''ll be awake later. Now let me sleep. Well, well, well. Looks like the latest circus freak just escaped. Why am I in free dress? Well, that''s the benefit of being the boss.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28815);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('. . . they only tell who''s left.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28816);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so short, when she saw a set of stairs she said, "I never knew Mount Everest was here." Yo Momma so short, she called a dolls house a set of flats!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28817);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat, that when she went on Biggest Loser, she she couldn''t get kicked out when she destroyed the stage.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28818);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so fat that, on the airplane, she smothered the person next to her to death - who was on the aisle seat.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28819);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me: Do you wanna hear a good joke? Amy: Yes! Me: Me too!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28820);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0. No lightbulbs want to torture their own kind!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28821);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Guess. Guess who? What, I don''t know.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28822);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman''s child said, "Yo Mama, I hate you because you made me a boy, not a girl!" The woman said, "Wait! If you were a girl, someone would have to cut into you to get your baby!" The child said "Have you lost your mind?! I want the baby to know that she/he was from me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28823);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your dad has something wrong with his brain. After his appointment, the doctor says,"You have a spider, a termite, a pig, a cloud, a piece of poo, a tongue, and a camera in your brain so you''ll have to have no brain for years." Then the doctor took operation on his brain.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28824);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock Who''s there? Who''s There. Who''s there Who? I''m supposed to say Who''s there!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28825);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('That guy looks like Jesus... and so does his friend.. did Jesus have a twin? "No, at least.. I dont think he did.. never thought about it" "Oh, well. Twins are awesome... hey, why is Jesus walking into our school? *gasp* what if he rapes us all?! JESUS IS A PEDO!" "Calm down, Jesus isn''t a pedo, he loves kids!" "Gee, that helps"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28826);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Funny Signs: Tailor''s Shop: Ladys have fits upstairs. Restaurant: People who find the waitresses rude ought to see the manager. Restaurant: We serve people like you as good food! Mall: The lift is being fixed today. We regret that for the next 24 hours you will be unbearable. Muffler Store: No appointment necessary, we will hear you coming. Restaurant: Today''s Special - Soup $5.00, Dessert $3.50, Children, $4.00. Zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, please give it to the guard on duty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28827);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day a cat was being trapped be a evil dog. The evil dog said"barkity kalis hed resaw miop gas." The cat said "has that going to break the spppeeel?" Then the dog let the cat out. The next day, the cat trapped the dog. Then it happens every day with thhe same words.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28828);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not Catholic, but I gave up picking my belly button for lint. At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote. I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28829);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock! Who''s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up and answer the door!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28830);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you are inventing something, the best way for it to work is to give it a job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28831);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The similarity of all the people that live is that they are alive and they are living.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28832);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Jesus was born on the computer age, he would just use the internet to spread his word unlike his time, he needs to journey across the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28833);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Freddy:May I please use the telephone for a while? Lady Flora:Yes, you may. Then Freddy saw a poster of Jollibee. There it says that the only telephone number you may dial in Rhode Island if you want to talk to them is: 626-999-626. Freddy called that number. Freddy:626-999-626. Jollibe Customer Service:Hello, Jollibee customer service here. What do you want to order. Freddy: One piece Chicken McDonalds and any coffee by Figaro please. Then Freddy ran away because he was afraid what the customer service will say.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28834);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Maria went to the telephone booth to make her second insult call. She payed the telephone booth owner. Then she dialed: ABC-DEF-GHI. "Hello! May I take your order, please?" the Figaro delivery service said. "I want to order all the kinds of sushi you have, and please don''t forget the chopsticks." Maria replied. "Looks like we have another insult call."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28835);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It is really insulting when someone from the Greenwich restaurant see you eating a pizza from Pizza Hut.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28836);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was walking down the road and saw a sign which read, "SIDEWALK AHEAD CLOSED. PLEASE USE OTHER SIDE OF ROAD". Oooh, it made me cross!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28837);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s better than going to school? Having play time every day!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28838);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the limping man sit on a scorpion? He thought that it would be "pinched"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28839);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s a cannibal? A: dod dn p s,o uosd ', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28840);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Oh I really love my husband he''s so cute and kind and everything! I will never do anything to hurt him. Jack: Looks like you really love your husband, teacher. Cara: It looks pretty obvious. After lunchtime the bell rang and everyone went to their classroom. When their teacher came... Teacher: Who keeps putting this ball pen on my table?! I will spill the ink to the one who keeps putting this thing. Cara: Ummm teacher a while ago your husband came and put that ball pen on your table, and he told me to remind you that that was the ball pen that you were looking for since last month.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28841);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the morning elephants put springs on their feet and jump around the jungle. Now the most fearsome sound to a monkey is "Boing Boing"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28842);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma so stupid when she heard the doorbell she opened the microwave and said "Hello???"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28843);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a break at work, John and Steve are chit-chatting about what happened the previous night: John: "OK, well last night the wife and I decided to go see a play. I waited for 10 minutes downstairs for her to get ready, and we got on our way. So, we''re driving down the street, when suddenly a car from oncoming traffic swerves into our lane! I quickly gripped the wheel, and turned out of the way. I hit the guardrail, so my car spun out, took 2 flips in the air, and landed in the ditch at the side of the road. But - guess what? My wife and I crawled out of the car WITHOUT a scratch. What do you think?" Steve: "I...I just can''t believe it." John: "I know, right? Isn''t it unbelievable how we made it out alive and absolutely fine?" Steve: "No..not that. I just can''t believe that it only took your wife 10 minutes to get ready!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28844);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They had quite a scare in Washington, DC, today. Apparently, President Obama was meeting with some potential cabinet nominees and someone noticed a suspicious looking document on the table that no one had ever seen before. Turns out it was just a tax form, but it gave them quite a fright. - Jay Leno', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28845);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe figured out a way to remember his wife''s birthday and their wedding anniversary. He opened an account with a florist and told him to send flowers to his wife on those dates, along with a note signed, "Your loving husband." His wife was thrilled by the attention, and all was great until one anniversary. Joe came home, saw the bouquet, kissed his wife, and said, "Nice flowers. Where''d you get them?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28846);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The thing you need to focus on in your 20''s is not getting a bad tattoo. You don''t want to be 40 and going, "No, dude, it was different back then - everybody loved SpongeBob."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28847);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have an 18-year-old; her name is Alexis. I chose that name because if I hadn''t had her, I''d be driving one.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28848);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The reason grandparents and children get along so well is really quite simple: They have a common enemy.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28849);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Summer was over and the teacher was asking the class about their vacations. She turned to little Johnny and asked what he did over the summer. "We visited my grandmother in Minneapolis, Minnesota," he said. "That sounds like an excellent vocabulary word," the teacher said, "Can you tell the class how you spell that?" Little Johnny thought about it and said, "Come to think of it, she lives in Ohio."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28850);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing. A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready. "All set back here, Captain," came the reply, "except one lawyer who is still going around passing out business cards."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28851);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A waitress at a restaurant that David worked at had a change of clothes stolen from the break room. To make matters worse, she''d planned on wearing them to the Christmas party. As a brand-new employee, David knew none of this backstory, so you can imagine his surprise when the found a note on the employees'' community board saying: "It has been two weeks since the Christmas party, and I still have not found my clothes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28852);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Real headline: "Air Traffic Controllers Can Apply for Job in Braille"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28853);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ben never saw action on his high school football team. One day, the assistant coach gave him a pep talk. "Remember, Ben," he told him, "everyone on this team has an important role. There is no ''I'' in ''team''." "True," said the boy. "But there is a ''Ben'' in ''bench''."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28854);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The pressure of a workday can bring out the weirdness in people. Possibilities for stupidity are endless. Here are some real conversations: Boss: "You make too many mistakes! You''re not very consistent." Cube Dweller: "Well, you can''t be consistent all the time." Cashier: "And what form of payment will you be using today?" Customer: "Money." Office Manager: "Where were you yesterday?" Peon: "I was at my cousin''s funeral." Office Manager: "Why? Did she die?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28855);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('For those with jobs that require sitting at a computer all day who don''t want to spend the money for those fancy exercise machines, here is a little secret for building arm and shoulder muscles. Three days a week is best. Begin by standing (in your cubicle works well) with a five pound potato sack in each hand. Extend your arms straight out to your sides and hold them there as long as you can. After a few weeks, move up to ten pound potato sacks and then fifty pound potato sacks, and finally get to where you can lift a one hundred pound potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute. Next, start putting a few potatoes in the sacks.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28856);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two mice were waiting for the right time to get out of their mouse hole, because a cat was meowing on the other side. After a few minutes, the meowing stopped and was replaced by the "woof, woof!" of a dog. Thinking it was okay to come out, the mice crawled out of their hole and were pounced on by the cat. After its meal, the cat said, "I always knew learning a second language would come in handy."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28857);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old couple had been married for fifty years. To celebrate their fiftieth anniversary, the man took the woman on a trip, and they were to stay at an upscale hotel. When they got there, the woman told the bell boy, "This is an awful hotel. Why is it upscale? No windows, no bathroom, no air conditioning." "But, madam!" the bell boy protested. "Don''t ''but madam'' me," the lady said. "This is one of the worst hotels I''ve ever even tried to stay at. I''m going to report it to your manager." "But, madam!" the bell boy persisted, "this isn''t your room, this is the elevator."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28858);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This comes from an elderly man that spoke with me in a waiting room once. "I don''t like these places," he said, "They''re always trying to find out what you''re thinking. "But I was nifty, I got around her, see. I had a way around it." He looked at me and continued. "She asked me if I was hearing voices, and I said ''Yes, ma''am, I hear you talking to me right now.'' And when she asked if I felt like hurting myself or anybody else, I said ''No m''dear, but I really am going to hurt the next person who asks me that question.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28859);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy at work argued with everybody that his pink oxford shirt was actually "salmon." Finally, human resources brought in a grizzly bear to settle the dispute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28860);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Can you tell the headline by the satirical publication "The Onion" from these real headlines? "Couple recalls war years, 63 years of marriage.'''' "Gun who killed officer said to have mental problems." "Smokers asked to keep butts off beach." "Volunteers needed to help abuse victims." "Study finds link between red wine, letting mother know what you really think." "Orleans seeks tenants for new jail." Answers: 1. "Sudbury Town Crier" (Massachusetts) 2. "Times-Standard" (Eureka, California) 3. "San Diego Union-Tribune" 4. "Santa Barbara News-Press" 5. "The Onion" 6. "Daily News" (Batavia, New York)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28861);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('whats hitlers least favourite planet ? - jewpiter', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28862);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde woman in Georgia bought a magnolia tree from a local nursery but, after only a few months, its leaves shrivelled and it appeared to be on its last legs. She took some leaf samples back to the nursery and demanded an explanation. "Oh, I know exactly what''s wrong with your magnolia tree, ma''am," said the manager. "Good," she replied. "What is it?" "Autumn!" he said.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28863);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Henry: Oh my enemies makes me so mad I want to kill them! Phil: I can help you with that. Henry: How? Phil: First, go to the internet cafe. When you are already using the computer make a folder and name it "Your Enemies". After that, delete the folder. Go to the recycle bin and delete the folder again. It should say "Do you really want to delete "Your Enemies"?". Click yes. Now you don''t have your enemies any more. They''re deleted out of this world. There''s no way you can get them back unless you create them. Henry: Oh! Now I can get rid of them; but what if I decide to create them again? How can I create them again? Phil: There''s no way you can create them again, Henry. To create them, of course they need to be born. You said that all females are your enemies.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28864);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The judge summoned the opposing lawyers to his chambers. Confronting the lawyers, the judge said: "Each of you has presented me with a bribe." The lawyers squirmed uncomfortably. "Mr. Hearnski, you gave me $15,000. Mr. Joy, you gave me $10,000." The judge then handed a check to attorney Hearnski. "Now then, I''m returning $5,000 to Mr. Hearnski and we''ll decide this case solely on its merits!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28865);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do Michael Jackson and Speed Racer have in common? They both have a monkey and a small boy in their trunk.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28866);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every man believes every woman''s ultimate fantasy is to have two men at once. While a recent sociological study verified this, what men don''t realize is that, in women''s fantasies, one man cooks while the other cleans!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28867);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a couple who were big over-spenders. They always dreamed of spending holidays in Hawaii, but were never able to save any money to do so. One day they came up with an idea - each time they had sex, they would put $20.00 bill into a piggy bank. They bought the piggy, and followed that procedure for about a year. After that time, they decided that there was enough money for their dream vacation and broke the piggy bank. The husband looked at their savings and said: "Isn''t it strange - each time we had sex, I put $20.00 into the piggy, but I see tons of $50.00 bills and a few $100.00 bills." The wife replied, "Do you think that everybody is as stingy as you are?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28868);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was a woman who absolutely loved the music of Billy Joel and Paul McCartney. She loved them so much she decided to have their images tattooed on her body. She went to a tattoo parlor and told the artist she wanted Billy Joel tattooed on her left thigh, and Paul McCartney tattooed on her right thigh. When the job was completed, the artist gave her a mirror to inspect his work. She exclaimed that neither of the images looked like what they were supposed to be. The artist said let''s get another opinion. He went out to the street and asked a drunk to come in and assist with a little problem. There sat the woman, with her legs apart, and the artist asked the drunk what he saw. He replied, "Well...that looks like Billy Joel on her left, Paul McCartney on her right...and that looks like Willie Nelson in the middle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28869);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was often said that if an African American was ever voted in to be the President of the United States, that would be the the day that pigs fly. 100 days after President Barack Obama is in office, swine flu.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28870);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was in town looking for a little something from the ladies. A cab driver gave him an address and told him he could find anything he wanted there. When the young man arrived, he saw a door with a small panel on it. He knocked and the panel slid open. A female voice asked what he wanted. "I want to get screwed," said the man. "OK, but this is a private club. Slide twenty bucks in the slot as an initiation fee," answered the voice. The man slid twenty dollars in the slot, the panel closed, and ten minutes passed. Nothing happened. He began to pound on the door, and the panel slid open. "Hey," exclaimed the man, "I want to get screwed!" "What?" said the voice, "Again?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28871);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Maths teacher asks a blonde girl what comes after 69?" Essex girl replies "you wash your face and rinse your mouth DUH...!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28872);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Those Wonderful Church Bulletins. The Fasting and Prayer Conference includes meals. Ladies, don''t forget the rummage sale. It''s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands. The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been cancelled due to a conflict. Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered. The Associate Minister unveiled the church''s new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28873);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Press Release Scare At Adelaide F.C. (Football Club) Headquarters Training at West Lakes was delayed nearly two hours late this morning, after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the ground. Initially the Club thought it was a prank! Team manager Neil Craig immediately suspended training, while police and the ASIO (Australia Special Investigations Office) were called to investigate. After a complete analysis, SA Police forensic experts determined that the white substance, unfamiliar to most of the players, was in fact, the goal line. Practice will resume this afternoon after police and ASIO decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28874);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you know if you have the swine flu? You wake up in pigtails and then break out in rashers!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28875);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Swine flu may affect your hearing: you could get crackling in one ear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28876);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top 10 Signs of Having Swine Flu 1. Tears flow from your small eyes during a nightly bedtime reading of Three Little Pigs. 2. A small curly tail is growing at the top of your tailbone. 3. When called to dinner, you head directly to the trough in the backyard. 4. Your thumbs and big toes are missing. 5. You apply mud instead of suntan lotion on a sunny day. 6. You develop a liking for truffles. 7. At each meal you literally lick your plate clean. 8. You emit short snorts between sentences. 9. When friends visit you, they remark, "Man, this place is a pigsty!" 10. Fever accompanied by the smell of bacon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28877);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I hear there''s now a sine flu as well. Someone on the news was going off on a tangent about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28878);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so ugly when she passed a horror movie filming the camera man said "Hey! No breaks, get back on set."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28879);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q:Why can peter pan fly? A:Because if you got hit in the peter with a pan you''d fly too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28880);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so stupid she drowned in the shower.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28881);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two eggs sitting on a kitchen table, when one sees a whisk. He says to his friend, "Ooh, what''s that?" The friend replies, "Beats me!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28882);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is a pool table green? Because if someone racked your balls you''d be green too.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28883);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A kid was at school when his male teacher was passing out alot of homework. The teacher was named bob. Mr. Bob said ''''no help from your mom''''. The kid named josh ask ''''why can''t we have help from are mom ''''.Mr.bob replied '''' your mom probally be very busy tonight so I will call your mom to make sure you want''''.So he decided not to ask his mom for help on his homework. when he got home Mr.bob called his mom. She went to her room. When she got in there was a loud noise and he went in there to see what was the matter.mr.bob was sitn there with his mom.And affter a while mr.bob said ''''did you finish your homework''''.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28884);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s worse than a brunette building a fire under water? A blonde trying to put it out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28885);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This guy is walking along a dirt road when he stumbles upon a redneck lying on the ground with his ear in the dirt. "Are you alright? What are you doing?" the man asks but gets no answer at all. The redneck doesn''t even acknowledge that he is there. So after a while of silence the man asks again, "Can I help you sir?" The redneck replies this time. "Ford pick-up truck, blue, 18 inch rims, two passengers, female driver." "Wow! You can tell all that by listening to the ground!" the man says. "NO" The redneck replies with a shocked look on his face "The bitch ran over me 10 minutes ago!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28886);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman goes into a tattoo parlour and tells the tattoo artist that she wants a tattoo of a turkey on her right thigh just below her bikini line. She also wants him to put "Happy Thanksgiving" under the turkey. So the guy does it and it comes out looking really good. The woman then instructs him to put a Santa tattoo with "Merry Christmas" up on her left thigh. So the guy does it and it comes out looking good, too. As the woman is getting dressed to leave, the tattoo artist asks, "If you don''t mind, could you tell me why you had me put such unusual tattoos on your thighs?" She says "I''m sick and tired of my husband complaining all the time that there''s nothing good to eat between Thanksgiving and Christmas!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28887);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man approached the window of a movie theater with a chicken on his shoulder and asked for two tickets. "Who''s the other ticket for?" the ticket girl asked. "For my pet chicken," he said, pointing to the bird. "I''m sorry," the girl tells him, "but we don''t allow animals in the theater." The man walked around the corner of the building, and stuffed the chicken into his pants. He returned to the ticket window and bought a ticket, entered the theater, and sat down. The chicken started to get too hot, so the man, figuring it was okay because it was dark, unzipped his pants and let the chicken stick its head out. The woman seated next to him looked down in horror. She nudged her friend Amanda and whispered, "Amanda! This man next to me just unzipped his pants!" Amanda replied, "Oh, don''t worry about it. Just ignore him. If you''ve seen one, you''ve seen them all." The woman whispered back, "I know, I know, but this one''s eating my popcorn!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28888);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Outside the Bristol Zoo, in England, there is a parking lot for 150 cars and 8 coaches, or buses. It was manned by a very pleasant attendant with a ticket machine charging cars 1 (about $1.40) and coaches 5 (about $7). This parking attendant worked there solid for all of 25 years. Then, one day, he just didn''t turn up for work. "Oh well", said Bristol Zoo Management, "we''d better phone up the City Council and get them to send a new parking attendant . . ." "Actually," said the Council, "that parking lot is your responsibility." "Surely," said Bristol Zoo Management, "the attendant was employed by the City Council, wasn''t he?" "Err . . . NO!" insisted the Council. Sitting in his villa somewhere in Spain, is a bloke who had been taking the parking lot fees, estimated at 400 (about $560) per day at Bristol Zoo for the last 25 years. Assuming 7 days a week, this amounts to just over 3.6 million ($7 million)!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28889);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I''ve got to take you in, pal. You''re obviously drunk." Our wasted friend asked, "Officer, are ya absolutely sure I''m drunk?" "Yeah, buddy, I''m sure," said the copper. "Let''s go." Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said, "Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28890);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('They sat in the comer of Mulligan''s refurbished bar, opposite a huge new floor-to-ceiling mirror. Suddenly Pat spotted their reflection across the room. "Mick! Mick!" he whispered. "Don''t look now, but there''s two fellas over there that''s the image of us!" "In the name of God," said Mick, spotting the reflection, "and they''re wearing identical clothes, too." "That does it," said Pat. "I''m gonna buy ''em a drink." Just as Pat rose from his seat, Mick stopped him. "Sit down, Pat! One of ''em''s coming over here!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28891);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly and somewhat hard-of-hearing man was sitting in a stylish downtown attorney''s office as his lawyer handed him his will. "Your estate is very complex," said the lawyer, "but I''ve made sure that all of your wishes will be executed. Due to the complexity, my fee is $4500." Just then, the phone rang and the lawyer got involved with a long call. Thinking the lawyer had said "$500," the old man wrote out his check and left. When she got off the phone and realized the old man''s mistake, the lawyer ran after him down the stairs and into the parking lot just as he drove away. Feeling frustrated, the lawyer looked at the check and decided to accept the situation philosophically. "Oh well," she said to herself, "$500 for half an hour''s work isn''t bad."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28892);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a compilation of actual Church Bulletins and Service bloopers: * Our next song is "Angels We Have Heard Get High". * Jean will be leading a weight-management series Wednesday nights. She''s used the program herself and has been growing like crazy! * Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones. * The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir. * The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Shirley Green, who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28893);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Y''know - just when I think I''ve finally figured out women, I wake up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28894);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What I saw, it was burned into my mind forever. "Well, that explains the red markings on your scalp."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28895);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('She was only a whisky maker''s daughter, but he loved her still.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28896);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One stormy night an English, Irish and Scottish man were walking home and had no shelter so at the top of this big hill they found this haunted house. They were all freaked out and hesitated to go in. Eventually, the English man went in and found a five pound note sitting on the table and he goes to lift it when all of a sudden the ghost of Mickey Mouse appears and says, "I''m the ghost of Mickey Mouse; lift that fiver and I''ll haunt your house." Next the Scottish man went in and saw the fiver, but before he could lift it the ghost of Mickey Mouse appeared again and said, "I''m the ghost of Mickey Mouse; lift that fiver and I''ll haunt your house." Finally, the Irishman went in and lifted the fiver and Mickey Mouse popped out again and said, "I''m the ghost of Mickey mouse, lift that fiver and I''ll haunt your house." Then the Irishman said, "I''m the ghost of Donald Duck; I''ll lift this fiver and I''ll run like fuck."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28897);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A store owner makes a sign to hang in his window. FRESH FISH SOLD HERE A critic walks into the store and asks the owner if he would like his store critiqued. He says yes. "Well, first thing''s the sign," says the critic. "''Fresh Fish Sold Here''? Well, where else would you sell ''em?" FRESH FISH SOLD "''Fresh Fish Sold''. What else would you be doing, giving ''em away?" FRESH FISH "''Fresh Fish''. Kinda obvious. Would you sell rotting fish?" FISH "''Fish''. People walk by, they see a fish in the window. What do they think you sell, chicken?" -', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28898);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was my first vacation out of my home country - I was going to Australia. It was also going to be my first time on a plane, so I got a nice, large, purple bag with one of the long, pull-out handles and wheels on the bottom so you can pull it around. It was a new experience for me! But, when I got to Australia, I watched the carousel go around and I saw nothing but the long handle. I even checked the sticker, and it was from my bag. I was furious. I walked up to a woman who worked at the airport and said, "Explain this to me!" She looked at the handle. "Are you sure that''s your bag?" she replied. "Yes!" I cried, "but I''m missing most of it!" "Well, did you leave it unattended at some point?" "I guess I must''ve!" "Okay, now we''ve nicked it. Tell me what it looks like so we can get it back." More angry than before, I cried, "Well, it''s got a long black handle!" The woman wrote that down.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28899);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three friends sat down in the new cafe'' in town. They began to have casual conversation, and eventually jokes were brought up. One of them said, "Oh, did you hear the joke about the guy in hell drinking coffee and eating a doughnut?" Before anyone could answer, though, the man across the room told the waitress, "I''ll have some coffee and a doughnut"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28900);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A special kind of firework with very bright colors and little smoke was accidentally discovered when a man tried to make the atomic bomb safer. That defeats the original purpose.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28901);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Everyone knows that common phrase, meaning, ''COME ON, I NEED TO GET LUCKY!'' Well, whenever I need to get lucky, I say, Daddy needs a new pair o'' pants! (Come on, winter is coming!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28902);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jersey girls aren''t trash; trash gets picked up.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28903);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How long does a black woman take to do a shit? 9 months', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28904);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every year the class of Ms. Marquez has a class urine contest. The goal is to be the one to pee the most. If you do, you win. There are four contestants. One is from Japan, another is from the United States, the next is from Mexico, and the last, but definitely not the least, is from the Philippines. The Japanese filled a gallon with urine. The audience clapped. The American filled five big tanks of urine. The audience clapped and shouted. The Mexican filled five big tank and a gallon with urine. The audience clapped, shouted, and danced. Here is the Filipino. When th Filipino finished his turn, there were no one who clapped, shouted, nor danced, because the whole classroom was filled with urine.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28905);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As a senior at Xxxxxx State University in Mixxxxxxx, I often engage women psychology majors in heated discussions about male-female relationships. Once, my friend Shelly and I got into a hot debate about whether men or women make the larger sacrifice of their respective gender characteristics when they get married. To my surprise, Shelly agreed with me that men give up far more than women. "You''re right, Steve," she said. "Men generally give up doing their cleaning, their cooking, their grocery shopping, their laundry . . ."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28906);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, Farrah Fawcett died and went to heaven. At the gates, St.Peter greeted her. "Hello, and welcome. You have lived a life full of prosperity and love. You have given millions around the world entertainment with your acting. Now I will provide you with one wish for the Earth before you enter Heaven. What is it?" Farrah thought for a minute, but answered, "I would like all the children in the world to be safe." The next day, Michael Jackson died.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28907);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This poem is for every guy who has a girl who wants poetry and songs devoted entirely to them ;) ( Sung to row row row my boat ) Suck, suck, suck my cock suck my god damn cock blow it hard you fucking ''tard suck my god damn cock! Please, if this offends you don''t read it, no need to comment on how horrid it is, this is not every one''s brand of humor . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28908);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Someone approaches you to say hi and your immediate response is, "You bet I am!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28909);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why aren''t there more Kenyans in the Olympics? All the rest couldn''t outrun the slave traders!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28910);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple was attending Mass. About halfway through, the wife leans over and says to her husband, ''I just let out a silent fart; what do you think I should do? He replies, ''Put a new battery in your hearing aid.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28911);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sir Lancelot was losing patience with Lady Guinevere. He had fought battles; he had jeopardized his reputation; he had ruined his friendship with King Arthur. But it was all worthwhile just to have this time with his lovely lady. They had run away for a little while, but Lancelot was growing angry because Guinevere was spending all her time on a stupid crossword puzzle. When she raised her quill to write in another word, he snapped. He couldn''t take it any more. He yelled in a harsh tone, "GIVE ME THE PEN GUIN!" After that, she thought he had lost his mind, and left him.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28912);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde mother runs her own daycare business. She has two of her own kids and has about 15 kids in her daycare. One day the blonde takes the children to the park to play, when a brunette walks up and notices the blonde and her daycare kids. She goes to the blonde and asks her, "Are all these kids yours?" The blonde replies, "No, I have two of my own." The brunette proceeds to ask which two are the blonde''s. The blonde laughs and says. "My kids go to the YMCA daycare center." The brunette asks in a puzzled voice, "Why are they there when you run your own daycare?" The blonde looks at her and says, "Because I can''t afford what I charge."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28913);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma''s so fat when she jumped off the ship a sailor yelled, "Land Ahoy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28914);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This couple is walking to a bank, and they''re trying to get at a savings account, when suddenly a bank robber comes in. He tells everyone to get against the wall, then he told the banker to put all the money in the bag. He then walks up to a man, and said, "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man replies, "Yes." Bang, he shoots him. He gos to another man; "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man gives no answer, then the robber puts the gun up to his head and said, "Did you see me rob this bank?" "Yes," the man replies. The robber shoots him, then he goes up to the couple and once again said, "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man replies, "No, but my wife did."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28915);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I tried for years to snap my thumb and finger together - and suddenly it clicked!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28916);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS: (1) They live here. You don''t. (2) If you don''t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That''s why they call it ''fur''-niture. (3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people. (4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don''t speak clearly. Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they (1) eat less, (2) don''t ask for money all the time, (3) are easier to train, (4) normally come when called, (5) never ask to drive the car, (6) don''t hang out with drug-using people; (7) don''t smoke or drink, (8) don''t want to wear your clothes, (9) don''t have to buy the latest fashions, (10) don''t need a gazillion dollars for college and (11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28917);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you shut up a crying baby? Finish the job.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28918);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you think god gets stoned? I do. Look at the platypus! -Robin Williams', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28919);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if a blonde has been in your fridge? There is lipstick on the cucumber', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28920);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Goodman was a moderately successful stockbroker who dreamed of making the big money some day. He took his friend out for a drive, and he chose the route carefully in order to impress on him the possibilities of the brokerage business. "Look at that yacht," he said as they drove slowly past a marina. "That belongs to the senior partner at Merrill Lynch. The head of Goldman, Sachs, owns that one over there, and look at that huge yacht out there - that''s the pride and joy of the top seller at Prudential-Bache." His friend was silent. Goodman turned to look at him and saw a pained look on his face. "What''s the matter?" Goodman asked. "I was just wondering," his friend said, "why aren''t there any customers'' yachts?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28921);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A police man arrested a MBA marketing girl.... GIRL: I''M not involved in sex COP:Then what are you doing? GIRL: I am selling condoms and offering a free a trial', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28922);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a black priest? Holy Crap!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28923);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once upon a time in a land where everyone updates there Facebook status every 5 seconds, there was a young girl named Isabel. When Isabel was reading her cereal box, she thought "Oh.Maybe I should check my Facebook." So Isabel walked over to her Mac and sat down. She typed in Facebook.com and clicked enter. But when she tried to sign in, it said "cookies required." "Okay." Isabel said so she walked into the kitchen and over to the cupboard and looked for some cookies. But she did not find any. So Isabel went to Hyvee with her mom and bought some cookie mix. 10 minutes later she had some cookies.So Isabel got her dads hand saw and sawed the Mac in half. Afterwards, she stuffed every single crumb of cookie inside that computer,and duct taped it back together', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28924);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Once there was a large group of mexicans who made a club called the I love Mayonnaise Club. And they made this club days before the titanic set sail. And on the titanic there was a large, large case of mayonnaise. And later when the titanic sank, this group was very sad so they formed a holiday called "Sink-o Da-Mayo"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28925);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I ever need a good laugh....Yo Momma', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28926);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what George W. bush thinks during his cabinet meetings. Hmmm...what does the w stand for? Wait... there isn''t even a cabinet in here!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28927);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following is a list of the U.S. deaths in certain places. September 11: 2,752 War on Terror: 4,344 We beat ourselves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28928);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there? Dennis What is Den? My name is Dennis What is Den? Den is like a mini barnyard or a mini house Oh!Anyways who are you? I am Dennis!! I forgot what den is again. ARGH!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28929);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What does PPSH-41 stand for? It is:Perfectly and Painfully and Stubborn Hallucination for(4) one(1)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28930);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A male teenager went out to his favorite band concert "The Hearts of Heaven". They have very cool songs but their singer''s life would end the very next night. The next night, they made their next concert which is in the capital of the teenager''s country. It wasn''t very far. He went to the concert and enjoyed the songs, but one made him a bit twitchy. It was called "Take my heart out". The song made the teenager go to the singer''s house, and take his heart out. All the other band members tried to stop him but he also got their hearts. He put them in a small box. Later the police found out that one of the windows of the house was stained with blood. They went in and took a look. He saw that the people in the house got their hearts out. 2 weeks later, they were sent to the hospital. During the operation, the doctor said, "The cause of this is the song "Take My Heart Out." I suppose should I take that suspect through a therapy test."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28931);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We all know the world war II games right?And they also have the Thompson gun which belongs to the Americans and British. There is a 2nd meaning. (Capital letters make for Thompson not just the beginning words.If you know what I mean) Thompson means:Theories Having Oatmeal Mayhem.Prefers to Sadness because Oatmeal is Numb. Capital letters are the letters of Thompson.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28932);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock Knock Who''s there Z Z who? Z taxi is leaving! I don''t speak Italian or French or anything of your so-called "Special" Language!*Slams door*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28933);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many exciting people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, because they are VERY excited, one of them cracks the lightbulb and another throws the screw at their neighbor''s house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28934);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology and mixed emotions when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, that''s a bunch of crap; I bet you can''t tell me anything that will make me happy and sad at the same time." She said, "You have the biggest penis of all your friends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28935);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman is walking down the street with a pack of menstrual pads in her hand, after buying them from the store. A homeless guy comes by and kindly asks for money. The woman says she has no change. So, the guy being a smartass says, "Can I have some of that bread in your hand?" The woman being a bigger smartass says, "Meet me tomorrow and I will give it to you with some ketchup on it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28936);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ll never guess what just happened! I just got arrested for punching a black woman. It wasn''t my fault it was my mom''s. We were in Home Depot when she told me to go find a Black & Decker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28937);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, I was about to tell my ''Micky Mouse is Mad'' joke to my friends, when I get to the part "Mickey Mouse was in the Divorce court..." One of my friends interrupted me and started yelling... "But why is it Mickey Mouse? Why not Steamboat Willie? Or George?" Losing interest, I noticed there was a post-it on my backpack. I threw it to my second friend. He opened it and read ''Fluffy?'', and threw it to my first friend droning on and on and on and on and on and.... He said this. "Why is Steamboat Willie the same as Mickey Mouse? Steamboat Willie is a boat driver and Mickey Mouse does NOTHING. He just sits around being all-" then he got the post-it. "FLUFFY? He just sits around being FLUFFY?" We laughed than I said I''d post this on Wocka. I got home and started typing ''One day, I was about to tell my ''Micky Mouse is Mad'' joke to my friends....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28938);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what did one gay say to the other when they broke up? ''''YOU''RE SUCH A PAIN IN THE A*S''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28939);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The "bishop" came to our church today The was a fucken impostor He never once moved diagonally', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28940);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This 4-year-old kid is sitting on the couch watching T.V. silently, with an angry look on his face. After a while, his mother notices this and asks him, "Why the long face?" "Well, Mommy, I know that you invited everyone to your wedding. You invited grandpa, grandma, my uncle, your friends and all . . ." "So what''s the problem, Sweety?" his mother asks. "WELL, WHY DIDN''T YOU INVITE ME?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28941);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me and my friend were IMing and it was like this... Me:BRB Him: kake Me:heh Him:I LIKE KAKE Me:i like 3.1415926535 Him:Pi >:0', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28942);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1 Good Grades 2 Social life 3 Adequate Sleep. Pick Two Welcome to College...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28943);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, have you got a ladder? Yes; why? I have to write an essay on an elephant!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28944);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Johnny comes home from school, and shouts, "Mother!" Mother calls from upstairs, "If you wish to speak to me, come upstairs so you don''t have to shout." When Johnny gets upstairs, she says, "Now, what did you want to say to me?" "Just that I trod in some dog do, but it seems to have gone now!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28945);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There were cockroaches in the corner of a hotel when four people saw it and reacted differently. The hotel manager saw the cockroaches, and said "Can somebody please clean these up? It''s ruining my hotel." A customer saw it and said "Don''t the hotel facilities know how to maintain this hotel clean and free of gross creatures? I''m out of here." A movie star saw it and said "Eeewww, crochy! Go away!" Then a beggar outside saw it and said "Is that dinner? For me?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28946);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('21st Century... Our communication - Wireless Our dress - Topless Our telephone - Cordless Our cooking - Fireless Our youth - Jobless Our food - Fatless Our labour - Effortless Our conduct - Worthless Our relation - Loveless Our attitude - Careless Our feelings - Heartless Our politics - Shameless Our education - Valueless Our follies - Countless Our arguments - Baseless Our boss - Brainless Our Job - Thankless Our Salary/Allowance - Very less !!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28947);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a recent review, The Weird Gamers rated popular game, Grand Theft Auto IV 3.14 out of 10. They said it was pirated.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28948);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Chinese family of four was eating fried rice for dinner. As always, the half-blind father was last. Thinking that nobody will care if he throws his food out, he does so, as he sees an empty garbage can. The next morning his wife says to him: "Honey, while you were eating dinner I took the garbage out, and now some ee-diot left crap in the box. Please clean it up"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28949);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('JOHNNY : Hey billy, you like Fishsticks? BILLY : Yeah... JOHNNY : So, you put Fishsticks in your mouth? BILLY : Yeah why? JOHNNY : What are you Billy, a gay fish?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28950);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So my friend and I were talking (for real this time) at lunch and he told a joke. Him: So this kid found beer under his brother''s bed and before he went to school he drank like 5 bottles and was drunk. Then his teacher asked him what 7+7 was and he was like 302 and the teacher said it was right in a slurred voice. Then the conversation continues and I tell some of boodler''s and Newf''s and Drunky''s and alex1234''s (hey, it''s not illegal) and after a while I take a swig of my milk carton, slam it down like a drunk and say 302. My friend was like, "Huh?" then breaks out laughing a belly laugh.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28951);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know how we earn little icons next to our names for the points we get for being active on Wocka? They should do that on Facebook. Only backwards. The longer you are totally inactive, the higher level symbols you get.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28952);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('DMV jokes get old really fast. Unlike the DMV. You have to go through a special line to become old.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28953);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Good morning is a contradiction in terms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28954);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE! DUH! Aw c''mon, how many times are you gonna fall for this?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28955);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call an intelligent man in America? A tourist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28956);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Donkey meets a Buick at the High Road. "Hello car", the Donkey says. "Hello donkey", the Buick replies, when suddenly the Donkey begins to cry. "Oh my" the Buick says. "Why are you crying"? "Well, when i now call you car, you can at least call me horse.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28957);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many ADHD kids does it take to change a lightbulb? It takes twenty se- hey, this is in the wrong category!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28958);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day little Susie, who is a blond(since this is in the ''blond'' category), was at her grandma''s house. She had been there for about two days and today grandma isn''t feeling very well. The grandma is in bed, coughing and it isn''t getting any better. The Grandma tells little Susie to go to the pharmacist and get some syrup for her cough. So little Susie goes to the local pharmacy and she buys the syrup. The clerk tells her to remember to ''SHAKE WELL BEFORE USE''. Susie goes back to the house and moments later, the ambulance has arrived and the doctors are trying their best to save poor granny. When they questioned Susie about what happened, she says "Well, the clerk at the pharmacy and the instructions on the bottle said ''SHAKE WELL BEFORE USE''". One doctor said "So?". "Well I shook granny very well and gave her the medicine. Do you think this happened cause I didn''t shake her well?" replies Susie who is now in tears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28959);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so stupid, that she made a crack on the sidewalk and tried to smoke it!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28960);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If a fly can fly, can an elephant elephant?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28961);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw yo momma walkin'' down the street the other day, with a fat pig under her arm. So, I went up to her and asked, ''''Hey, where did you get that?'''' and the PIG says ''''I won her in a contest!''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28962);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How Many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? 1:Let''s go ride our bikes! 2:Hey look! A squirrel.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28963);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock? Who''s there? Little Boy Blue! Little Boy Blue Who? Michael Jackson! If you don''t get it, read the title. If you still don''t get it, pm me. If you STILL DON''T GET IT, you''re an asshole', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28964);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, I was bored and I felt like going for a ride on my bicycle. I hadn''t been used for a while, since I use my car. So, I dusted it off and went off for a 1 hour ride. I was going down the street and I''m known for my absent mindedness. I didn''t notice this guy was crossing the street and I went and bumped into him. Now, this man was mad cause he was wearing his new white pants and my tire got it all dirty. I got off my bike and he gave me a scolding for 2 minutes until some passersby came to my rescue and calmed him down. One of ''em said "Hey, calm down buddy. He''s just a kid"(I am 17). And the man says "A kid?! Look at him! He looks like he can MAKE kids now!". I was like "Wha...? Hey, you''re lucky I wasn''t drivin'' my car!".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28965);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jimmy To Billy : You ain''t half the man yo momma was. But hey, you ARE half the girl yo papa was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28966);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Jimmy: Hey, you momma is so fat, that she fills up Myspace Billy: Hey, yo momma IS my space, your space and everybody''s space!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28967);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('These danish chicks flash their hairy armpits, while they catch guys'' reaction on candid camera. Scroll in a few minutes - it is hilarious http://www.dr.dk/pirattv/programmer/soestrene-bidsk/soestrene-bidsk-tester-angst-for-haar/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28968);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know what? Everybody is screwed these days. In the office, you''re screwed if you don''t do you''re job well. At home, You''re screwed if you don''t listen to your parents. At school/college, You''re screwed by many- Teachers, bullies, the principal etc... And they say we''re all screwed on December 21st 2012! But, these things don''t bother me. The one thing that makes me mad is when I''m looking for a virgin and they''re ALL screwed!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28969);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('USA:What''s wrong world? World:(crying and sniffling) My kitty died! USA: That''s unfortunate. Here''s a couple hundred billion dollars my hardworking citizens paid. I was gonna spend it on education and defence and whatnot, but you need it more. World:(takes the money) Cheapass! (spits in USA''s face)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28970);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was kneeling by his bed, praying. His wife walks in and asks "Whatcha doin''?" The man - once finishing - says "Praying." "Whatcha prayin for?" says the lady. "Guidance." "Don''t pray for guidance, pray for stiffness and I''ll guide it myself!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28971);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bulls are in a locker room when one guy notices the other dude has a cork in his ass. He says, "How''d you get a cork in your ass?" The other bull says, "I was walking along the beach and I tripped over a lamp. There was a puff of smoke, and then a red man in a turban came oozing out. He said, ''I am Tonto, the Genie. I can grant you one wish.'' And I said, ''No bullshit!''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28972);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Apparently, a Polish driver living in southern Ireland by the name of Prawo Jazdy had racked up dozens of speeding tickets and parking fines - but with a different address on each occasion. Eventually, the Garda discovered that Prawo Jazdy is Polish for ''driving licence''. . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28973);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You probably know for a fact that Adolf Hitler had only one testicle. And here we say ''''You got to have balls to become a leader''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28974);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple was watching the news when the man farts. The man asks "Was that me, or you?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28975);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy comes home from school and runs to his father. The boy says ''''Dad, a boy in my class calls me a gay'''' . ''''Oh yeah? Well then beat him up!'''' says his dad. The boy replies ''''I can''t dad!''''. ''''Why not son?''''. The boy looking away says ''''Because he''s kinda cute''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28976);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('No cure here. . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28977);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma is so old that when she farts, dust comes out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28978);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat, she''s NOT on A Diet. . .she''s on two Diets cause one ain''t fittin'' her well!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28979);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Moe the midget always gets bullied by Terrance the tall goon. After many months of getting bullied and being made fun of his size, Moe has had it. One day, Moe challenges Terrance saying, "If you can do everything I can, then I will leave town forever and if you can''t, then you will have to leave town and never return." Terrance accepts with confidence. For the first round, Moe does 10 back-flips continuously. A crowd watching the whole thing, claps. Unfortunately, Terrance also does the back-flips and wins the round. For the second round, Moe does a hand stand and walks around for several minutes without losing balance. This round is also won by Terrance. For the final round, Moe ask for Terrance to spread his legs apart while standing. Terrance does so. Moe runs in between Terrance''s legs 5 times and says, "Now YOU do that," and Moe spreads his legs apart . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28980);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma has afros on her nipples', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28981);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the integral of 1/cabin? A natural log cabin. No, a houseboat you forgot to add the c!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28982);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If only DEAD people understand hexadecimal, how many people understand hexadecimal? 57005.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28983);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do mathematicians always confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28984);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An analyst, a pure mathematician, and a statistician apply for a job. The interviewer asks each of them the question "What is 1/3 multiplied by 3?" The analyst enters it into his calculator and replies that the answer is 0.9999999. The pure mathematician replies that the answer is obviously 1. Then, the statistician asks the interviewer "What do you want it to be?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28985);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mathematician and his best friend, an engineer, attend a public lecture on geometry in thirteen-dimensional space. "How did you like it?" the mathematician wants to know after the talk. "My head''s spinning," the engineer confesses. "How can you develop any intuition for thirteen-dimensional space?" "Well, it''s not even difficult. All I do is visualize the situation in n-dimensional space and then set n = 13."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28986);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mathematician, an engineer and a chemist are at a conference. They are staying in adjoining rooms. One evening they are downstairs in the bar. The mathematician goes to bed first. The chemist goes next, followed a minute or two later by the engineer. The chemist notices that in the corridor outside their rooms a rubbish bin is ablaze. There is a bucket of water nearby. The chemist starts concocting a means of generating carbon dioxide in order to create a makeshift extinguisher but before he can do so the engineer arrives, dumps the water on the fire and puts it out. The next morning the chemist and engineer tell the mathematician about the fire. She admits she saw it. They ask her why she didn''t put it out. She replies contemptuously "there was a fire and a bucket of water: a solution obviously existed."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28987);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first goes up to the bartender and says, "I''ll have a pint of lager, please." The next one says, "and I''ll have half of what he''s having." The bartender says, "You''re all idiots," and pulls two pints.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28988);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are on a train in Scotland. The astronomer looks out of the window, sees a black sheep standing in a field, and remarks, "How odd. Scottish sheep are black." "No, no, no!" says the physicist. "Only some Scottish sheep are black." The mathematician rolls his eyes at his companions'' muddled thinking and says, "In Scotland, there is at least one sheep, at least one side of which looks black."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28989);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Premise I: Knowledge is power. Premise II: Power corrupts. Conclusion: Therefore, knowledge corrupts.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28990);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is sin x divided by n? Canceling the "n" yields six.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28991);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A dozen, a gross, and a score Plus three times the square root of four Divided by seven Plus five times eleven Is nine squared and not a bit more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28992);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If 1/(x-8) approaches as x approaches 8 from above, then will 1/(x-3) approach as x approaches 3 from above?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28993);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Super Agility: "Oh look, a bullet. Better dodge that!" *mega-jump!* Bulletproof: "Oh look, a bullet. Meh, who cares?" Super Smart: "Eureka! A Bullet! It going 60 MPH will hit me in 5 seconds if it contacts, but there is only a 1 in 7 chance it will hit me, the decimal being 0.1428571429 to the tenth pl-OOOFF!" Which do YOU want? Me: Super Agility. Comment for your choice, but it doesn''t have to be one of these.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28994);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Army brat was boasting about his father to a Navy brat. "My dad is an engineer. He can do everything. Do you know the Alps?" "Yes," said the Navy brat. "My dad has built them." Then the navy kid spoke: "And do you know the Dead Sea?" "Yes." "It''s my dad who''s killed it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28995);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Englishman and the Scotsman both walk into a bar. The Irishman ducks under it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28996);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, a Scotsman and a rabbi walk into a bar. The rabbi stops and says "I think I''m in the wrong joke."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28997);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Dane, a Norwegian and Snakeyboy made a wager on who could remain inside a goat pen the longest. First out was the Dane, who came out after just 10 minutes yelling "Damn! The goat stinks!" After him the Norwegian went in, and after half an hour he came out yelling, "Damn! The goat stinks!" Finally Snakeyboy went in. After 2 hours the goat came rushing out yelling "Damn! Snakeyboy stinks!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28998);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You know you''re addicted to wocka when your friends say something funny, and you cry out ''''LOL, LOL'''' instead of actually laughing out loud.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 28999);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('U.S. President Calvin Coolidge and his wife allegedly visited a poultry farm. During the tour, Mrs. Coolidge inquired of the farmer how his farm managed to produce so many fertile eggs with such a small number of roosters. The farmer proudly explained that his roosters performed their duty dozens of times each day. "Perhaps you could point that out to Mr. Coolidge," pointedly replied the First Lady. The President, overhearing the remark, asked the farmer, "Does each rooster service the same hen each time?" "No," replied the farmer, "there are many hens for each rooster." "Perhaps you could point that out to Mrs. Coolidge," replied the President.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29000);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a bullfighter tries to do. (avoid-a-bull)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29001);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('too much to pay for corn ([a] buck an ear)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29002);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fashionably dressed big cat (dandy lion)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29003);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Possessing only ten teeth. (deca-dent)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29004);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Where people wait for buses. (the-bus-station)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29005);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('live long (die late)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29006);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Consumption of an expensive meal. (fortune-ate)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29007);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A flaming elf. (imp-alight)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29008);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('where one places dirty dishes (in the sink)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29009);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Fred got home from his Sunday round of golf later than normal and very tired. "Bad day at the course?" his wife asked. "Everything was going fine," he said. "Then Harry had a heart attack and died on the 10th tee." "Oh, that''s awful!" "You''re not kidding. For the whole back nine it was hit the ball, drag Harry, hit the ball, drag Harry..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29010);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A golfer, playing a round by himself, is about to tee off, and a greasy little salesman runs up to him, and yells, "Wait! Before you tee off, I have something really amazing to show you!" The golfer, annoyed, says, "What is it?" "It''s a special golf ball," says the salesman. "You can never lose it!" "Whattaya mean," scoffs the golfer, "you can never lose it? What if you hit it into the water?" "No problem," says the salesman. "It floats, and it detects where the shore is, and spins towards it." "Well, what if you hit it into the woods?" "Easy," says the salesman. "It emits a beeping sound, and you can find it with your eyes closed." "Okay," says the golfer, impressed. "But what if your round goes late and it gets dark?" "No problem, sir, this golf ball glows in the dark! I''m telling you, you can never lose this golf ball!" The golfer buys it at once. "Just one question," he says to the salesman. "Where did you get it?" "I found it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29011);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The train was about to pull out of the station. A young man ran towards it and managed to throw his bag in and climb aboard just in time. A fellow passenger looked at him and said, "Young man, you should be in better shape! At your age, I could catch the train by a gnat''s whisker and still be fresh. Look at you, panting away." The young man took a deep breath and said, "I missed this train at the last station."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29012);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Wocka users does it take to change a lightbulb? A: All of ''em. One to hold the lightbulb and the rest to argue if this is funny or not.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29013);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Italian suppositories. (in-you-end-os)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29014);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Me not on time. (I-(am)-so-late)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29015);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A foot. (leg-end)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29016);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An English tramp. (hobo)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29017);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In favour of youth. (pro-teen)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29018);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What trees do in Spring. (re-leaf)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29019);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('how geese fly (in formation)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29020);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29021);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you use a banana as a compass? Place a banana on the Berlin Wall. East is where a bite has been taken out of it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29022);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Berlin children spoke to each other over the wall. The little girl in the West says, while eating a banana, "Look - I have a banana." The boy in the East doesn''t want to be inferior to her in anything and says, full of pride: "We have socialism." The girl counters: "So, we''ll have socialism soon too." The boy, triumphant: "See, then you won''t have any bananas any more either!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29023);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In the GDR, at traffic hubs and in front of supermarkets there are "banana machines". You stick a banana in and five Ostmarks come out!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29024);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A west-german boy to a ddr-boy: Why is the banana curved? The ossie replies: Why, is this curved? (old Hungarian joke)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29025);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Which three great nations in the world begin with "U"? - USA, USSR, and our (German:unsere) GDR (USA, UdSSR, Unsere DDR). (A play on the way official discourse often used the phrase "our GDR", and also often exaggerated the GDR''s world status.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29026);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks in school: "What is the most important thing in socialism?" The students consider and little Fritz (Fritzchen) answers: "The most important thing in socialism is the human!" The teacher: "That is a good answer, Fritzchen. I will give you a B-grade." Fritzchen is dissatisfied and responds emphatically: "Would you maybe give me an A if I told you what the human''s name was?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29027);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks: "Fritzchen, why are you always speaking of our Soviet brothers? It''s ''Soviet friends''." Fritz responds: "Well, you can pick your friends."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29028);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honecker meets Mao and asks him: "How many political opponents do you have in China?" Mao: "I estimate about 17 million." Honecker: "Oh, that''s pretty much the same here." (The GDR had 17 million inhabitants)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29029);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The teacher asks: "Fritzchen, what is the difference between capitalism and socialism?" Fritz replies: "Capitalism is the exploitation of man by man. Under socialism, it is the other way around."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29030);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The fact that the GDR considers itself as one of the 5 technologically most advanced power of the nations may be be given to the fact that there are only 5 fingers on a hand. University lecture in Hungary in the 70s', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29031);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Early in the morning, Honecker arrives at his office and opens his window. He sees the sun and says: "Good morning, dear Sun!" The sun replies: "Good morning, dear Erich!" Honecker works, and then at noon he heads to the window and says: "Good day, dear Sun!" The sun replies: "Good day, dear Erich!" In the evening, Erich calls it a day, and heads once more to the window, and says: "Good evening, dear Sun!" The sun is silent. Honecker says again: "Good evening, dear Sun! What''s the matter?" The sun replies: "Kiss my ass. I''m in the West now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29032);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between Honecker and a telephone? None! Hang up and try again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29033);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honecker and Mielke are discussing their hobbies. Honecker: "I collect all the jokes about me that are in circulation." Mielke: "Then we have almost the same hobby. I collect those who bring the jokes into circulation."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29034);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell that the Stasi has bugged your apartment? There''s a new cabinet in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29035);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Stasi agents are on a surveillance mission and quite bored. First agent: "Hey, what are you thinking about?" Second agent: "Oh, nothing special. The same as you..." First agent: "In that case, you''re under arrest!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29036);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guest: "A cup of coffee, please!" Waiter: "Turkish or filtered?" Guest: "Why, filtered, of course." Waiter: "Then you''ll have to bring your own filter paper for now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29037);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between an HO-sausage and Sputnik? They''ve officially confirmed that Sputnik 2 had a dog in it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29038);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What was the most-frequently used word at the German-German border? "Goose meat". (Gnsefleisch, sounds like the first three words in Genn'' se vleisch mal ''n Gofferraum offmachn? in the Saxon accent, Knnen Sie vielleicht mal den Kofferraum aufmachen? in standard German, which means Could you please open the trunk? )', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29039);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The doorbell rings. The woman goes to the door and shortly comes back startled and turns to her husband, seeking help: "Dieter! There''s a man standing outside who only asks ''Tat tata''" (Tat tata is onomatopoeia for the sound a police car siren makes). Dieter goes to the door and comes back laughing. "It''s my coworker from Saxony, asking "is do Dieta da?" (Ist der Dieter da?, "Is Dieter there?")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29040);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was fishing. After a while another angler came to join him. "Have you had any bites?" asked the second man. "Yes, lots," replied the first one, "but they were all mosquitoes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29041);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you double the value of a Trabant? Fill up the tank!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29042);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('VEB Sachsenring brought out a new Eco-Trabi: Immediately available for delivery, extremely cheap, extremely quiet, extremely environmentally friendly - with electric power train. Small problem: The extension cord is only 20 meters long and not in stock.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29043);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you know they have Knight Rider in the GDR? It''s a Trabant with a pocket calculator!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29044);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During a visit to the Leipzig Trade Fair, a filthy rich oil sheik heard that there is a car with a delivery time of over ten years. Since Rolls Royce usually delivers more quickly than that, it must be quite an exceptional car, which he would certainly have to have in his collection. Sight unseen, he made a request to order this Trabant. In Zwickau, they''re aware of this great honor, so they immediately change the running Five-Year Plan and bring forward a specimen. In the container, the car reaches the emirate in a handful of weeks. The happy oil sheik immediately called his friends together, opened the container, and exclaimed in surprise: "Gosh, they have incredibly long delivery times, but at least they send you a cardboard model in advance and the best, you can even drive it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29045);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A West German businessman is driving a Mercedes through East Germany on a rainy night when his windshield wipers stop working. He takes it to an East German mechanic, who tells him there are no Mercedes windshield wiper motors in the GDR, but he will do his best to fix it. When the businessman returns the next day, to his surprise the windshield wipers are working perfectly. "How did you find a Mercedes windshield wiper motor in the East?" he asks the mechanic. "We didn''t," replies the mechanic, "We used the engine motor of a Trabant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29046);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are there so many bananas in the West? Because the Westerners are descended from apes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29047);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a Western necktie and a cow''s tail? The cow''s tail covers the whole asshole.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29048);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the peak of the wave of East Germans fleeing through Hungary and Czechoslovakia in 1989, the persons still staying in East Germany (DDR) were called the "Der Dumme Rest" (the dumb remains).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29049);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you cross an Ossi with a Wessi? An arrogant unemployed person.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29050);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How can you tell that an elephant is in the bathtub with you? A: By the smell of peanuts on its breath.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29051);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do elephants paint their toes yellow? A: So they can hide upside down in the custard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29052);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did the Dallas chief of police say when the elephant walked into the police station? A: Nothing! He didn''t notice.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29053);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why do elephants have big ears? A: Because Noddy would not pay the ransom!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29054);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant? A: With a blue elephant gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29055);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant? A: Have you ever seen a yellow elephant?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29056);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you shoot a red elephant? A: Hold his trunk shut until he turns blue, and then shoot him with the blue elephant gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29057);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you shoot a purple elephant? A: Paint him red, hold his trunk shut until he turns blue, and then shoot him with the blue elephant gun.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29058);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many elephants will fit into a Mini? A: Four: Two in the front, two in the back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29059);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How many giraffes will fit into a Mini? A: None. It''s full of elephants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29060);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you get two whales in a Mini? A: Along the M4 and across the Severn Bridge.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29061);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you know there are two elephants in your refrigerator? A: You can hear giggling when the light goes out.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29062);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you know there are three elephants in your refrigerator? A: You can''t close the door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29063);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you know there are four elephants in your refrigerator? A: There''s an empty Mini parked outside.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29064);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do elephants have that nothing else has? Baby elephants!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29065);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is brown, has four legs, and a trunk? A: A mouse coming back from vacation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29066);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What has eight legs, two trunks, four eyes, and two tails? A: Two elephants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29067);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why is an elephant big, grey and wrinkly? A: Because if it was small, white and hard it would be an aspirin.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29068);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why are golf balls small and white? Because if they were big and grey they would be elephants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29069);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the difference between an elephant and a plum? A: Their color.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29070);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If I had only one day left to live, I would live it in my Social Studies class; it would seem so much longer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29071);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did Tarzan say to Jane when he saw the elephants coming? A: Here come the elephants.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29072);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What did Jane say to Tarzan when she saw the elephants coming? A: Here come the plums; she was color blind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29073);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is big and grey and comes in quarts? A: An elephant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29074);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Heaven is where the police are British, the cooks French, the mechanics German, the lovers Italian, and it is all organized by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are British, the mechanics French, the lovers Swiss, the police German, and it is all organized by the Italians.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29075);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29076);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Would you hit a woman with a baby? No, I''d hit her with a brick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29077);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What has four legs and ticks? A walking clock!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29078);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: How do you keep an idiot busy? A: Have him read this.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29079);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you''d like to know how to keep an idiot busy for hours, go to this page: http://www.wocka.com/joke.php?id=17559', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29080);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scottish Presbyterian is rescued after many years on a desert island. As he stands on the deck of the rescuing vessel, the captain says to him, "I thought you were stranded alone. How come I can see three huts on the beach?" - "Well," replies the castaway, "that one there is my house and that one there is where I go to church." - "And the third one?" asks the skipper. - "Oh, that''s my old church."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29081);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Rabbis argued late into the night about the existence of God, and, using strong arguments from the scriptures, ended up indisputably disproving His existence. The next day, one Rabbi was surprised to see the other walking into the Shul for morning services. "I thought we had agreed there was no God", he said. "Yes, what does that have to do with it?" replied the other.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29082);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The devil is the father of lies, but he neglected to patent the idea, and the business now suffers from competition.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29083);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two Rabbis were discussing their problems with squirrels in their synagogue attic. One Rabbi said they simply called an exterminator and they never saw the squirrels again. The other Rabbi said, "We just gave them all a bar mitzvah, and never saw the squirrels again."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29084);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Is one permitted to ride in an airplane on the Sabbath? A: Yes, as long as your seat belt remains fastened. In this case, it is considered that you are not riding, you are wearing the plane.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29085);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three hasidim are bragging about their Rebbes: "My rebbe is very powerful. He was walking once, and there was a big lake in his path. He waved his handkerchief, and there was lake on the right, lake on the left, but no lake in the middle." To which the second retorted, "That''s nothing. My rebbe is even more powerful. He was walking once, and there was a huge mountain in his path. He waved his handkerchief, and there was mountain on the right, mountain on the left, but no mountain in the middle!" Said the third, "Ha! That is still nothing! My rebbe is the most powerful. He was walking once on Shabbos (Saturday, the holy day in Judaism, on which it is forbidden to handle money), and there was a wallet crammed full of cash in his path. He waved his handkerchief, and it was Shabbos on the right, Shabbos on the left, but not Shabbos in the middle!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29086);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In Chelm, the shammes used to go around waking everyone up for minyan (communal prayer) in the morning. Every time it snowed, the people would complain that, although the snow was beautiful, they could not see it in its pristine state because by the time they got up in the morning, the shammes had already trekked through the snow. The townspeople decided that they had to find a way to be woken up for minyan without having the shammes making tracks in the snow. The people of Chelm hit on a solution: they got four volunteers to carry the shammes around on a table when there was fresh snow in the morning. That way, the shammes could make his wake up calls, but he would not leave tracks in the snow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29087);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The town of Chelm decided to build a new synagogue. So, some strong, able-bodied men were sent to a mountaintop to gather heavy stones for the foundation. The men put the stones on their shoulders and trudged down the mountain to the town below. When they arrived, the town constable yelled, "Foolish men! You should have rolled the stones down the mountain!" The men agreed this was an excellent idea. So they turned around, and with the stones still on their shoulders, trudged back up the mountain, and rolled the stones back down again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29088);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The sexton of the synagogue decided to install a poor box so that the fortunate might share their wealth with the needy. On shabbes eve, he announced to the congregation that a new opportunity for mitzvoh was available. "But," one member complained, "it will be so easy for the goneffs (thieves) to steal from the box." The sexton thought long and hard that night, and announced the next day that he had found a solution. Pointing upward, he showed, the poor box was now suspended from a chain at the ceiling, high, high, high overhead. "But now how do we put money in the box?" The next week, the congregation saw the wonderful solution. A lovely circular stairway now ascended to the poor box making it easy to contribute.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29089);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After the assassination of Tsar Alexander II of Russia, a government official in Ukraine menacingly addressed the local rabbi, "I suppose you know in full detail who was behind it." "Ach," the rabbi replied, "I have no idea, but the government''s conclusion will be the same as always: they will blame the Jews and the bicyclists." "Why the bicyclists?" asked the befuddled official. "Why the Jews?" responded the rabbi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29090);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the days of oppression and poverty of the Russian shtetls, one village had a rumour going around: a Christian girl was found murdered near their village. Fearing a pogrom, they gathered at the synagogue. Suddenly, the rabbi came running up, and cried, "Wonderful news! The murdered girl was Jewish!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29091);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During World War II, a sergeant gets a telephone call from a woman. "We would love it," she said, "if you could bring five of your soldiers over to our house for Thanksgiving dinner." "Certainly, ma''am," replied the sergeant. "Oh... just make sure they aren''t Jews, of course," said the woman. "Will do," replied the sergeant. So that Thanksgiving while the woman is baking, the doorbell rings. She opens her door and, to her horror, five black soldiers are standing in front of her. "Oh, my!" she exclaimed. "I''m afraid there''s been a terrible mistake!" "No ma''am," said one of the soldiers. "Sergeant Rosenbloom never makes mistakes!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29092);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Post-Soviet Russia. Rabinovich calls the Pamyat headquarters: "Is it true that we Jews sold out Mother Russia?" In return he hears an affirmation accompanied by antisemitic slurs. "Oh good. So where can I get my share?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29093);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Reform Rabbi was so compulsive a golfer that once, on Yom Kippur, he left the house early and went out for a quick nine holes by himself. An angel who happened to be looking on immediately notified his superiors that a grievous sin was being committed. On the sixth hole, God caused a mighty wind to take the ball directly from the tee to the cup a miraculous shot. The angel was horrified. "A hole in one!" he exclaimed, "You call this a punishment, Lord?!" Answered God with a sly smile, "So who can he tell?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29094);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Orthodox, a Conservative, and a Reform rabbi are each asked whether one is supposed to say a brokhe (blessing) over a lobster (non-kosher food, normally not eaten by religious Jews). The Orthodox rabbi doesn''t know what a "lobster" is. The Conservative rabbi doesn''t know what to say. The Reform rabbi says, "What''s a brokhe?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29095);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('We were married by a Reform rabbi in Long Island. A very Reform rabbi. A Nazi.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29096);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At an Orthodox wedding, the bride''s mother is pregnant. At a Conservative wedding, the bride is pregnant. At a Reform wedding, the rabbi is pregnant. At a Reconstructionist wedding, the rabbi and her wife are both pregnant.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29097);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rabbi Zwi Chaim Yisroel, an Orthodox scholar of the Torah and a man who developed whining to an art unheard of in the West, was unanimously hailed as the wisest man of the Renaissance by his fellow Hebrews, who totaled a sixteenth of one per cent of the population. Once, while he was on his way to synagogue to celebrate the sacred Jewish holiday commemorating God''s reneging on every promise, a woman stopped him and asked the following question: ''Rabbi, why are we not allowed to eat pork?'' ''We''re not?'' the Rev said incredulously. ''Uh-oh.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29098);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One early winter morning, Rabbi Bloom was walking beside the canal when he saw a dog in the water, trying hard to stay afloat. It looked so sad and exhausted that Rabbi Bloom jumped in, and after a struggle, managed to bring it out alive. A passer-by who saw this remarked, "That was very brave of you! You must love animals; are you a vet?" Rabbi Bloom replied, "And vhat did you expect? Of course I''m avet! I''m afreezing cold as vell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29099);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Jewish beggar was out on the street in New York City with his tin cup. "Please, sir," he pleaded to a passerby, "could you spare seventy-three cents for a cup of coffee and some pie?" The man asked, "Where do you get coffee and pie for seventy-three cents in New York? It costs at least a dollar!" The beggar replied, "So who buys retail?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29100);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire. I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows. And a foundation leaks and a ball game gets rained out and a car rusts and... If you don''t like my driving, don''t call anyone. Just take another road. That''s why the highway department made so many of them. Remember: you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar... Of course, how you spend your leisure time is your business. A man''s best friend is his dog. That''s assuming you want a friend who messes on your carpet and drools on your newspaper. If I won the lottery, I wouldn''t be one of those people who immediately quit their jobs. I''d make my boss''s life a living hell for a week or two first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29101);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions. Weird: STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS. No one ever says "It''s only a game," when THEIR team is winning. Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers? If it''s true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29102);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s a dog eat dog world out there. And they''re short on napkins. Married people don''t live longer than single people. It just seems longer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29103);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('After performing a marriage the rabbi gave some advice to the newlyweds: "The first ten years are always the hardest," said the rabbi. "How many years have you been married?" they asked. "Ten years," the rabbi replied.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29104);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is one Nobel Prize so much to ask from a child after all I''ve done?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29105);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sarah, how''s that boy of yours? "David? Ach, don''t ask - he''s living in Miami with a man named Miguel" "That''s terrible!" "I know - why couldn''t he find a nice Jewish boy?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29106);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Frenchman, a German and a Jew walk into a bar. "I''m tired and thirsty," says the Frenchman. "I must have wine." "I''m tired and thirsty," says the German. "I must have beer." "I''m tired and thirsty," says the Jew. "I must have diabetes."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29107);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Jewish man in a hospital tells the doctor he wants to be transferred to a different hospital. The doctor says "What''s wrong? Is it the food?" "No, the food is fine. I can''t kvetch." "Is it the room?" "No, the room is fine. I can''t kvetch." "Is it the staff?" "No, everyone on the staff is fine. I can''t kvetch." "Then why do you want to be transferred?" "I can''t kvetch!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29108);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Jewish man riding on a train begins to moan: "Oy, am I thirsty; oy, am I thirsty", to the annoyance of the other passengers. Finally, another passenger gets a cup of water from the drinking fountain and gives it to the old man, who thanks him profusely and gulps it down. Feeling satisfied, the other passenger sits down again, only to hear "Oy, was I thirsty; oy, was I thirsty".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29109);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi and a Catholic priest are having lunch in a restaurant. The priest''s food arrives, a scrumptious-looking ham entre. The priest attacks his lunch, savouring every bite of the ham. Noticing the rabbi eyeing him, he asks, "So tell me, Rabbi Goldblum, have you ever had any pork before?" The rabbi hesitates. "Well, it''s not for me to say..." The priest pushes on. "Oh, c''mon, Rabbi. We''re both men of God here. We can tell each other our sins. Nothing to it." "Umm... well, yes, as a matter of fact, I did have pork once." Smugly the priest teases him, "And a fine meat it was, wasn''t it? Heheh." "Yeah, I''ll say." A few moments pass. The rabbi asks the priest: "Tell me Father, have you ever had sex with a woman before?" "Why of course... well, before I took holy orders, that is." The rabbi smirks, "Sure beat the taste of pork, didn''t it?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29110);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi once asked his old friend, a priest, "Could you ever be promoted within your Church?" The priest says, thoughtfully, "Well, I could become a bishop." The rabbi persists, "And after that?" With a pause for consideration, the priest replies, "Maybe I could be a cardinal, even." "And then?" After thinking for some time, the priest responds, "Someday I may even rise to be the Pope." But the rabbi is still not satisfied. "And then?" With an air of incredulity, the priest cries, "What more could I become? God Himself?" The rabbi says quietly, "One of our boys made it."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29111);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rabbi is on his deathbed, and a friend asks him if he has any last requests. The Rabbi asks his friend to find him a Catholic priest, so that he might convert. Confused, his friend asks, "Rabbi, why? You have been a great teacher and leader of your followers, and you have led a good and honorable Jewish life. Why would you want to become a Catholic now, before you die?" He says, "Eh, better one of them than one of us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29112);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A minister told his friend Rabbi Goldman, "Last night, I dreamed of the Jewish Heaven. It was a slum, and it was overflowing with people running, playing, talking, sitting doing all sorts of things. But the dream, and the noise, was so terrific that I woke up." The rabbi said, "Really? Last night, I dreamed of the Protestant Heaven. It was a nice, proper suburb, with neatly trimmed lawns, and houses all neatly lined up." "And how did the people behave?" asked the minister. "What people?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29113);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Rabinovich, what is a fortune? A: A fortune is to live in our Socialist motherland. Q: And what''s a misfortune? A: A misfortune is to have such a fortune.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29114);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Armenian is on his deathbed: "My children, remember to defend the Jews." "Why Jews?" "Because if they are gone, we will be next."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29115);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old Jewish man is picked up by the Stalinist police and brought in for questioning: Where were you born?! St. Petersburg. Where do you live?! Leningrad. (menacingly) Where would you like to die?! St. Petersburg.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29116);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Comrade Lev, why now, just when things are getting better for your people, are you applying for an exit visa to make aliyah to Israel? A: Well, comrade, there are two reasons. One is that my next-door neighbor is Pamyat and he tells me that after they get rid of you communists, they are coming next after the Jews. Q: But they will never get rid of us communists! A: I know, I know, of course you are right! And that''s the other reason.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29117);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly man refuses to leave for the air raid shelter until he can find his dentures. His wife yells at him, "What, you think they are dropping sandwiches?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29118);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock! Who''s there? Delores. Delores who? Delores my shepherd...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29119);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Toc Toc! Qui est l? Sheila. Sheila qui? Sheila lutte finale...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29120);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock, knock! Who''s there, i'' th'' name of Beelzebub? Here''s a farmer that hanged himself on the expectation of plenty. Come in time, have napkins enough about you, here you''ll sweat for ''t.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29121);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock! Who''s there, in th'' other devil''s name? Faith, here''s an equivocator that could swear in both the scales against either scale, who committed treason enough for God''s sake, yet could not equivocate to heaven. O, come in, equivocator.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29122);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The economy is so bad. . . if the bank returns your check marked ''''Insufficient Funds,'''' you call them and ask if they meant you or them. The economy is so bad. . . a truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29123);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw a girl the other day. I didn''t like her because she was a butter face. You know ''butter face'' - she has a hot body, but her face . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29124);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock, knock! Who''s there? Faith, here''s an English tailor come hither for stealing out of a French hose. Come in, tailor. Here you may roast your gooses.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29125);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock, knock! Who''s there? Sobers. Sobers who? Sau baras se khatkhata rahen hain, Ab to darwazaa kholo.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29126);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q. How many Iranians does it take to change a light bulb? A. You send us the prize money and we''ll tell you the answer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29127);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The bartender turns to them, takes one look, and says "What is this - some kind of joke?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29128);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29129);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A performative poet of Hibernia Rhymed himself into a hernia He became quite adept At this practise, except For the occasional non-sequitur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29130);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''ve often started off with a lawyer joke, a complete caricature of a lawyer who''s been nasty, greedy and unethical. But I''ve stopped that practice. I gradually realised that the lawyers in the audience didn''t think the jokes were funny and the non-lawyers didn''t know they were jokes.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29131);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but the thing dies in the process and the innards are discouraging to any but the pure scientific mind.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29132);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three people of different nationalities walk into a bar. Two of them say something smart, and the third one makes a mockery of his fellow countrymen by acting dumb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29133);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is by me, the asshole who dupes himeself.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29134);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many members of a certain demographic group does it take to perform a specified task? A finite number: one to perform the task and the remainder to act in a manner stereotypical of the group in question.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29135);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There once was an X from place B, That satisfied predicate P, He or she did thing A, In an adjective way, Resulting in circumstance C.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29136);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ole goes out one day to use the outhouse, and he finds Sven there. Sven has his wallet out, and he''s throwing money down into the hole of the outhouse. Ole asks, "Uff da! Sven, watcha doin'' there, fella? You''re throwing the five dollar bill and the ten dollar bill down into the hole of the outhouse! Whatcha doin'' that for?" Sven answers, "Well, when I pulled up my trousers I dropped a nickel down thereand I''m not going down into that mess for just a nickel!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29137);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Big foot is blurry... that''s the problem!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29138);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It would be funny if, while performing an abortion, someone yelled ''abort! abort!''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29139);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have nothing to declare except my genius.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29140);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Race is just a pigment of the imagination.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29141);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If all those sweet young things were laid end to end I wouldn''t be a bit surprised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29142);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Take my wife please!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29143);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If it wasn''t for pickpockets, I''d have no sex life at all.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29144);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Overall, I''d say my career as a photographer has been a bit of a blur.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29145);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I have a map of the world... its actual size.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29146);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it possible to enjoy life to the fullest in the Soviet Union?" The Armenian Radio answers: "Yes, if you like crowded trains."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29147);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it good to have sex with an open window?" The Armenian Radio answers: "Yes, but with a woman it is better."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29148);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it true that in Moscow, Mercedes cars are being given to citizens?" The Armenian Radio answers: "Yes, but it is not Moscow but Leningrad, not Mercedes but Ladas, and not given to but stolen from."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29149);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it true that comrade cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin''s car was stolen in Moscow during the celebrations?" The Armenian Radio answers: "In principle yes, but it was not in Moscow, rather in Kiev, and it was not his car, but his bike and it was not comrade cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin, but comrade highschool teacher Gagarin and his first name was not Yuri, but Leonid..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29150);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Some provincial man has come to Rome, and walking on the streets was drawing everyone''s attention, being a real double of the emperor Augustus. The emperor, having brought him to the palace, looks at him and then asks: -Tell me, young man, did your mother come to Rome anytime? The reply was: -She never has. But my father frequently was here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29151);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man, standing before a censor, is about to testify, whether he has a wife. The censor asks: -Do you have, in all your honesty, a wife? -I surely do, but not in all my honesty.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29152);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A runner going to participate in the Olympic games had a dream, that he was driving a quadriga. Early in the morning he goes to a fortune-teller for explanation of the dream. The reply is: -You will win, that meant the speed and the strength of the horses. But, to be sure about this, the runner visits another fortune-teller. This one replies: -You will lose. Don''t you understand, that four ones came before you?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29153);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Russian company: You have two cows. You drink some vodka and count them again. You have five cows. The Russian Mafia shows up and takes however many cows you have.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29154);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man goes into his doctor''s office to learn the results of some tests and immediately the doctor greets him by saying "Well Sam, I have good news and bad news. Which would you like to hear first?" Sam decides on the bad news first and his doctor tells him "Sam, I''m very sorry but you have pancreatic cancer. It''s inoperable and you will die within the next 2 months" "That''s absolutely horrible! What could possibly be the good news?" "Well you see that beautiful receptionist out there?" "Yeah?" "I''m screwing her!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29155);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad to his family: The phone bill is exceptionally high. You have to limit its use. I don''t use this telephone. I use the one a the office. Mum: Same here, I hardly use this phone as I use my work telephone. Son: Me too, I never use the home telephone. I always use my company mobile. Maid: So what''s the problem? We all use our work telephones!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29156);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You have a million cows. Most of them are illegals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29157);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a chicken cross the street? Because it wants to get on the other side!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29158);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why should not a chicken cross the road? It would be a fowl proceeding.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29159);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why does a duck cross the street? Because it was the chicken''s and turkey''s day off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29160);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens weren''t invented yet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29161);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the duck cross the road? To prove he''s no chicken.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29162);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road halfway? To "lay it on the line".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29163);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What you humans call ''THE APOCALYPSE'', I used to call Sunday Dinner! - Archangel, Gabriel', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29164);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Music Teacher: Anyone has a suggestion to which song we should play next? Johnny: How ''bout we sing ''The Teacher is A Big Fat Bitch. . .in C-Minor?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29165);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If your father is a poor man, it''s your fate. But, if your father-in-law is a poor man, it''s your stupidity.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29166);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hw does Battery reproduce? Bi pluging it into Boodler''s Giant ass!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29167);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Because it was stuck to the chicken''s feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29168);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the duck cross the road? Because the chicken was on holiday.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29169);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t the chicken cross the road? Because he''s "chicken".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29170);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a chicken? Neither can ride a bicycle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29171);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had no frontal lobe.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29172);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If rock is wet, it is raining. If rock is green, it rained a while ago. If rock is white, it is snowing. If rock is shaking, there is an earthquake. If rock is dry, the weather is fair. If rock is swinging, it''s windy. If rock is warm, the sun is out. If rock is not visible, it''s dark outside. If rock is under water, there is a flood. If rock is gone, there is a tornado (Run!!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29173);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A heavy-set woman goes into a drug store and asks for talcum powder. The bowlegged clerk says, "Walk this way," and the woman answers, "If I could walk that way I would not need talcum powder!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29174);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How does boodler reproduce? By Fucking Battery''s fat-Shit-and-cum filled ass', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29175);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Battery Fucked Boodler''s ass hard and soft yesterday! Maybe zat explains z growth in z population recently!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29176);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('boodler---> kind of sounds like Boob blur! and zats why battery fucks boobler 69 times a day.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29177);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Pass me the shellfish, said Tom crabbily. "That''s the last time I''ll stick my arm in a lion''s mouth," the lion-tamer said off-handedly. "Can I go looking for the Grail again?" Tom requested. "I unclogged the drain with a vacuum cleaner," Tom said succinctly. "I might as well be dead," Tom croaked. "We just struck oil!" Tom gushed. "They had to amputate them both at the ankles," Tom said defeatedly. "Who discovered radium?" asked Marie curiously. "Hurry up and get to the back of the ship," Tom said sternly.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29178);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Scottish highlander is asked what his three wishes would be. He first wishes for a lake full of whisky. His second wish is for a similar quantity of good food. When asked for his third wish, after a moment of indecision, he asks for a second lake full of whisky.[2]', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29179);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The confused protagonist suddenly finding himself in the presence of the genie, who informs him that he has one wish left; he has just used the second wish to completely undo the effect of the first, including his own memory of making it. Undaunted, the protagonist makes his third wish, only to have the genie comment wryly (just before disappearing) that he wished for the same thing the first time.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29180);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Milk production at a dairy farm was low so the farmer wrote to the local university, asking help from academia. A multidisciplinary team of professors was assembled, headed by a theoretical physicist, and two weeks of intensive on-site investigation took place. The scholars then returned to the university, notebooks crammed with data, where the task of writing the report was left to the team leader. Shortly thereafter the farmer received the write-up, and opened it to read on the first line: "Consider a spherical cow in vacuum. . . ."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29181);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When I saw that item, I said to my wife, "I don''t think spaghetti grows on trees", so we''d looked it up in Encyclopdia Britannica. Do you know, Miall, Encyclopdia Britannica doesn''t even mention spaghetti.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29182);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In America, you can always find a party. In Russia, the Party finds you. In America, you listen to man on radio. In Soviet Russia, man on radio listen to you. In America, you watch television. In Soviet Russia, television watches you.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29183);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was reported to have said: "Nikolay is a moron!" and was arrested by the policeman. "No, sir, I meant not our respected Emperor, but another Nikolay!" - "Don''t try to trick me: if you say "moron", you obviously refer to our tsar".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29184);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An American, a Russian, and an African were all up in a hot-air balloon together. After a few minutes, the Russian man put his hand down through the clouds. He said, "We''re right over my homeland." "How can you tell?" asked the American. "I can feel the cold air," he replied. A few hours later the African man put his hand through the clouds. "We''re right over my homeland," he said. "How do you know that?" asked the Russian. "I can feel the heat of the desert." Several more hours later the American put his hand through the clouds. "Aah! We''re right over New York." The Russian and the African were amazed. "How do you know that?" they exclaimed. The American pulled his hand up. "My watch is missing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29185);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve probably heard: If at first you don''t succeed, lower your standards. New Version: If at first you get hit below the belt, lower your belt!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29186);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A respected merchant Sevenassov wants to change his surname and asks the Tsar for permission. The Emperor writes his resolution: "Allowed to deduct two asses down".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29187);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A judge walks out of his chambers laughing his head off. A colleague approaches him and asks why he is laughing. "I just heard the funniest joke in the world!" "Well, go ahead, tell me!" says the other judge. "I can''t - I just gave a guy ten years for it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29188);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Midnight Petrograd... A night watch spots a shadow trying to sneak by. "Stop! Who goes there? Documents!" The frightened person chaotically shuffles through his pockets and drops a paper. A soldier picks it up and reads slowly, with difficulty: "U.ri.ne A.na.ly.sis"... "Hmm... a foreigner, sounds like..." "A spy, looks like.... Let''s shoot him on the spot!" Then reads further: "''Proteins: none, Sugars: none, Fats: none...'' You are free to go, proletarian comrade! Long live the World revolution!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29189);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The principle of socialist economy of the period of transition to communism: the authorities pretend they are paying wages, workers pretend they are working. Alternately, "So long as the bosses pretend to pay us, we will pretend to work." This joke persisted essentially unchanged through the 1980s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29190);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lenin died, but his cause lives on!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29191);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Rabinovich notes: "I would prefer it the other way round."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29192);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a coincidence: "Brezhnev died, but his body lives on."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29193);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lenin coined a slogan on how to achieve the state of communism through rule by the Communist Party and modernization of the Russian industry and agriculture: "Communism is Soviet power plus electrification of the whole country!" The slogan was subject to popular mathematical scrutiny: "Consequently, Soviet power is communism minus electrification, and electrification is communism minus Soviet power."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29194);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The winter''s passed, The summer''s here. For this we thank Our party dear!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29195);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One old bolshevik says to another: "No my friend, we will not live long enough to see communism, but our children... poor children."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29196);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Will there be KGB in communism? As you know, in communism, the state will be abolished, together with its means of suppression. People will know how to arrest themselves.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29197);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('-How do you deal with mice in the Kremlin? -Put up a sign saying "collective farm". Then half the mice will starve and the others will run away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29198);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Abramovich was sentenced to 5 years, served 10, then fortunately was paroled before he served the rest of his sentence.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29199);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men sit in a jail in (KGB headquarters) Dzerzhinsky Square. The first asks the second why he has been imprisoned, and he says, "Because I criticized Karl Radek." The first man responds, "But I am here because I spoke out in favor of Radek!" They turn to the third man who has been sitting quietly in the back, and ask him why he is in jail too. He responds, "I''m Karl Radek."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29200);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Armenian Radio was asked: "Is it true that conditions in our labor camps are excellent?" Armenian Radio answers: "It is true. Five years ago a listener of ours raised the same question and was sent to one, reportedly to investigate the issue. He hasn''t returned yet; we are told he liked it there."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29201);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Comrade Brezhnev, is it true that you collect political jokes? "Yes" "And how many have you collected so far?" "Three and a half labor camps."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29202);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is it true that there is freedom of speech in the Soviet Union the same as there is in the USA? In principle, yes. In the USA, you can stand in front of the White House in Washington, DC, and yell, "Down with Reagan!" and you will not be punished. Just the same, you can stand in the Red Square in Moscow and yell, "Down with Reagan!" and you will not be punished.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29203);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is it true that the Soviet Union is the most progressive country in the world? Of course! The life was already better yesterday than it''s going to be tomorrow!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29204);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lenin, Stalin, Khrushchev and Brezhnev are all travelling together in a railway carriage. Unexpectedly, the train stops. Lenin suggests: "Perhaps we should call a subbotnik, so that workers and peasants fix the problem." Stalin puts his head out of the window and shouts, "If the train does not start moving, the driver will be executed!" But the train doesn''t start moving. Khrushchev then shouts, "Let''s take the rails behind the train and use them to construct the tracks in the front." But it still doesn''t move. Brezhnev then says, "Comrades, comrades, let''s draw the curtains, turn on the gramophone and pretend we''re moving!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29205);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('To sum up the Russians'' experience with political leaders thus far: Lenin showed how a country can be ruled; Stalin showed how a country should be ruled; Khrushchev showed that a moron can rule a country; Brezhnev showed that not just any moron can rule a country.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29206);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('During the famine of the civil war, a delegation of starving peasants comes to the Smolny, wishing to file a petition. "We have even started eating the grass like horses," says one peasant. "Soon we will start neighing like horses!" "Come on! Don''t worry!" says Lenin reassuringly. "We are drinking tea with honey here, and we are not buzzing like bees, are we?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29207);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A schoolteacher is leading her students through a park, and they see a baby hare. These are city kids, and have never seen a hare. "Do you know who this is?" asks the teacher. No one knows. "Come on kids", says the teacher trying to lead the children to the answer, "He''s a character in many stories, songs and poems we always read." One student "figures it out," pats the hare and says reverently, "So *that''s* what you''re like, Grandpa Lenin!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29208);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Comrade Stalin! This man is your exact double! / "Shoot him!" / "Maybe we should shave off his moustache?" / "Good idea! Shave it off and then shoot him!". (In another version, Stalin replies shortly Ili tak [lit. or so], meaning "this way is ok too", which has become somewhat proverbial).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29209);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stalin reads his report to the Party Congress. Suddenly someone sneezes. "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) "First row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Applause.) "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) "Second row! On your feet! Shoot them!" (Long, loud applause.) "Who sneezed?" (Silence.) ...A dejected voice in the back: "It was me" (Sobs.) Stalin leans forward: "Bless you, comrade!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29210);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was Khrushchev deseated? Because of the Seven "C"s: Cult of personality, Communism, China, Cuban Crisis, Corn, and Cuzka''s mother.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29211);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Leonid Ilyich is in surgery. / "Heart again?" / "No, chest expansion surgery: to fit one more Gold Star medal."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29212);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At the 1980 Olympics, Brezhnev begins his speech. "O!" - applause. "O!" - more applause. "O!" - yet more applause. "O!" - an ovation. "O!!!" - the whole audience stands up and applauds. An aide comes running to the podium and whispers, "Leonid Ilyich, that''s the Olympic rings, you don''t need to read it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29213);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Leonid Ilyich!... / "Come on, no formalities among comrades. Just call me ''Ilyich'' ".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29214);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The phone rings, Brezhnev picks up the phone: "Hello, this is dear Leonid Ilyich...".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29215);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard it? Brezhnev died! / "What happened, heart attack?" / "No, short-circuit of eyebrows."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29216);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Comrade Andropov is the most turned on man in Moscow! "Comrade Andropov is sure to light up any discussion!" "Why did Brezhnev go abroad, and Andropov did not? Because Brezhnev ran on batteries, but Andropov needed an outlet." (Reference to Brezhnev''s pacemaker and Andropov''s dialysis machine).', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29217);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the main difference of succession under tsarist regime and under socialism? "Under tsarist regime the power transferred from father to a son, and under socialism - from one grandfather to another."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29218);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today, due to bad health and without regaining consciousness Konstantin Ustinovich Chernenko took up the duties of Secretary General.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29219);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('In a restaurant: Why are the meatballs of cubic shape? Perestroika! (restructuring) Why are they undercooked? Uskoreniye! (acceleration) Why are they bitten? Gospriyomka (state approval) Why are you telling me all this so brazenly? Glasnost! (openness)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29220);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A quartet of violinists returns from an international competition. One of them was honored with the possibility to play a Stradivarius violin and cannot stop bragging about this. Another one grunts: "What''s so special about that?". The first one thinks for a minute: "Let me put it in this way for you: just imagine you were given a chance to make a couple of shots from Dzerzhinsky''s mauser..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29221);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What is more useful newspapers or television? A: Newspapers, of course. You cannot wrap herring in a TV.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29222);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Five precepts of the Soviet intelligentsia (intellectuals): Do not think. If you think do not speak. If you think and speak do not write. If you think, speak and write do not sign. If you think, speak, write and sign don''t be surprised.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29223);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife has been going to cooking school for three years. / "She must really cook well by now!" / "No, they''ve only reached the part about the Twentieth CPSU Congress so far."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29224);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a shop and says, "I see you don''t have any fish", and the shop assistant replies, "You got it wrong - ours is a butcher: we don''t have any meat. They don''t have any fish in the fish shop that is across the road!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29225);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dad, can I have the car keys? "Ok, but don''t lose them. We will get the car in just seven years!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29226);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When Yeltsin resigned from the Communist Party at the 28th Party Congress, people used to say that "Yeltsin is out of mind,... honour, and conscience of our epoch". (A hint at a widespread propaganda slogan: "Party is Mind, Honour and Conscience of our Epoch")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29227);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard, Putin ordered the government to arrest the inflation. Well, not exactly, he ordered to have it arrested...and jailed.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29228);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Stalin''s ghost appears to Putin in a dream, and Putin asks for his help running the country. Stalin says, "Round up and shoot all the democrats, and then paint the inside of the Kremlin blue." "Why blue?" Putin asks. "Ha!" says Stalin. "I knew you wouldn''t ask me about the first part."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29229);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Attempting to enter a case-sensitive password with caps-lock on. Not checking to ensure that the computer is indeed plugged in. Clicking Yes on message boxes without reading them properly and deleting important files. Forgetting to plug an ethernet cable into their laptop''s network card when in the office. Allowing sessions to timeout when using a web application. Erroneous data entry.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29230);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the beast shall come forth surrounded by a roiling cloud of vengeance. The house of the unbelievers shall be razed and they shall be scorched to the earth. Their tags shall blink until the end of days.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29231);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And the beast shall be made legion. Its numbers shall be increased a thousand thousand fold. The din of a million keyboards like unto a great storm shall cover the earth, and the followers of Mammon shall tremble.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29232);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('And so at last the beast fell and the unbelievers rejoiced. But all was not lost, for from the ash rose a great bird. The bird gazed down upon the unbelievers and cast fire and thunder upon them. For the beast had been reborn with its strength renewed, and the followers of Mammon cowered in horror.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29233);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Irishman, a Scotsman, and an American walk into a bar. The beginning of a cheesy joke? You betcha.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29234);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As of 11-23-09, my score was 1337. How the hell that happened beats me. I thought I was a crappy joke writer. This is boring isn''t it? Thought so. At least it''s not a dupe. Or is it... Nope, it''s not. Boring as hell, right? Thought so.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29235);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('*This is from a comic called Pearls Before Swine, I just wanted to share it with you guys(crowd goes *awwww*)* Dentist(on phone p-D): Hi, this is Dr. Smith''s office calling to remind you about your dental appointment tomorrow. Other Person(P): Can''t make it. D: Why? P: Profanity. It offends me. D: I didn''t use profanity. P: Car won''t start. D: You live a block away. P: 2 broken feet. D: We''ll send a cab. P: No money. D: We''ll pay. P: Mom died. D: You said that last year. P: Dad this time. D: You don''t know which? P: Can''t keep track. D: OF YOUR PARENTS?!?! P: When training for a marathon. D: On 2 broken feet? P: I drive the race. D: Your car won''t start. P: I take a cab. D: You have no money. P: Mom died again. D: Listen here, buddy! Get me a legitimate excuse or get the @!$!@$#% over here! P: Profanity. It offends me. *hangs up* P: Amateurs.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29236);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How dod the person take over the remote?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29237);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How did the person take over the remote? He asked for remote CONTROLS!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29238);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you ever had those days when your computer fucking sucks? Now you have a poem to say! I''m gonna get some Coke and a snack, This should be FUCKING WORKING by the time I get back.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29239);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('God said "Let there be light." Chuck Norris said "Say please."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29240);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Pokemon Trainer walks into a STD help center. The nurse there says "Sorry, but it looks like you''ve caught ''em all"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29241);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is a insult I use on my brother''s girlfriend if she starts annoying me too much. She has a very tiny bridge in her nose that is only noticeable if you look close enough. Its fun to mess with her about it cause she is very self conscious about it. That bridge on your nose is so big, it could fit Rosie O''Donald across the Grand Canyon!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29242);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor, Doctor! I have a virus that makes my left hand constantly butter toast. How can I stop it spreading?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29243);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I was talking to my family and we were doing a family get together session, you know the one teens dread? That one. And my mom asks me, ''if you could ask one person 2 questions, what would ask them?'' So I thought and decided to question" the director of the movie 2012." Me: Sir, your movie is based of the catastrophes that might happen in 2012. Will most people die? Director of 2012: Sure. Me: If you go down, do George Clooney and Brad Pitt go down with you, because that will make me the sexiest man alive.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29244);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-Knock...Who''s there?....The Gestapo...The Gestapo, who?.....VEE VILL BE ASKING ZE QUESTIONS HERE!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29245);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two hillbillies just come out of a divorce court. The ex-wife is crying her eyes out. Her ex-husband comes over and says: "There, there Missy, you''re still my sister!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29246);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mum''s so fat she fell in love and broke it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29247);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mum''s so fat, she jumped for joy and got stuck.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29248);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Wife : "I dreamt they were auctioning off dicks. The big ones went for ten dollars and the thick ones went for twenty dollars." Husband : "How about the ones like mine?" Wife : "Those they gave away." Husband : "I had a dream too . . . I dreamt they were auctioning off cunts. The pretty ones went for a thousand dollars, and the little tight ones went for two thousand." Wife : "And how much for the ones like mine?" Husband : "That''s where they held the auction."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29249);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When was the price of milk the highest? When the cow jumped over the moon.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29250);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is red, black, has ten eyes, and crawls? I do not know but it is on your head.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29251);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is SO fat that the amount of food she eats for dinner could feed ALL the Ethiopeans for a year!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29252);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama is so dumb each time she hears Obama''s name on tv she throws her hands in the air + ducks for cover Yelling OH BOMB A WHERE?!?!?!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29253);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why did hitler kill himself? because he saw his gas bill', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29254);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('they says theres safety in numbers? tell that to six million jews!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29255);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: What''s the best way to kill a man? A: Put a pretty blonde and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one. Q: Why do men whistle when they''re sitting on the toilet? A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe. Q: What is the difference between men and women:.... A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need...A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need. Q. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg ? A. They don''t stop for directions. Q: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving HER money, furs and diamonds. Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29256);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock-knock Who''s there? Someone Someone who? Someone who cuts of during mid sen . . .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29257);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a mother wants for Mother''s Day 10. To be able to eat a whole candy bar (alone) and drink a soda without any "floaties" (ie, backwash). 9. To have my 14 year-old daughter answer a question without rolling her eyes in that, "Why is this person my mother?" way. 8. Five pounds of chocolate that won''t add twenty. 7. A shower without a child peeking through the curtain with a "Hi Ya Mom!" just as I put a razor to my ankle. 6. A full time cleaning person who looks like Brad Pitt. 5. For my teenager to announce "Hey, Mom! I got a full scholarship and a job all in the same day!" 4. A grocery store that doesn''t have candy/gum/cheap toys displayed at the checkout line. 3. To have a family meal without a discussion about bodily secretions. 2. To be able to step on a plane with my toddlers and NOT have someone moan, "Oh no! Why me . . . !" 1. Four words: Fisher Price Play Prison!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29258);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A black man and a Jew jump off a building; who wins? Society.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29259);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('why are black people getting stronger? tv''s are getting bigger', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29260);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('CONCLUSION: There is a new study about women and how they feel about their asses, the results were pretty interesting: 30% of women think their ass is too fat . . . 10% of women think their ass is too skinny . . . The remaining 60% say they don''t care, they love him, he''s a good man, and they wouldn''t trade him for the world.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29261);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many country singers does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 to screw it in, and 3 to write a song about it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29262);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the farmer say when his truck disappeared? Where''s my truck?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29263);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Momma'' so fat, she gets winded going up the escalator!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29264);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It was really hot last summer. In fact, it was so hot I saw a republican with his head out of his ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29265);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Part 1 One day, Doraemon was walking down street. He saw Hello Kitty approaching him. Excited by the encounter, he walked towards Hello Kitty and said, "Good morning". Sadly, Hello Kitty did not reply him. Why? Answer: Hello Kitty has no mouth. ------------------------------------ Part 2 Unhappy that she broke Doraemon''s feelings, Hello Kitty decided to bring along a video recorder with the words "Good Morning" recorded by someone else. She saw Doraemon crossing the street, so she approached him and pressed the button: "Good morning". This time, Doraemon did not reply her. Why? Answer: Doraemon has no ears.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29266);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a series of jokes my friend told me. They were hilarious, and I thought I should share it with everyone. Apologies for any dupes. You: Want to hear a corny joke? Them: Ok You: Where do you plant corns in a farm? Them: Don''t know. Where? You: At the CORNers You: Do you want to hear a cornier joke? Them: Yes You: (pull one lower eyelid) CORNEA! (goofy tone) You: Do you want to hear a long joke or a short joke? Them: Long joke You: Jjjjjoooooookkkkkkkeeeee (drag as long as you can) Them: Short joke You: Jo'' (say it very really fast) Enjoy! :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29267);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man- "Jesus Christ! I can''t open this hard drive." Jesus- "Use the torx, Luke."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29268);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whats the difference between a black man and a farm tractor? Nothing! The tractor is just an upgrade!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29269);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. You consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 38 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by. 2. If you''re proud that Alaska makes the national news 96 nights each year because Trapper Creek is the coldest spot in the nation. 3. If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year. 4. If your dad''s suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead. 5. If you may not have actually eaten it, but you have heard of jellied moose nose. 6. If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time. 7. If you have either a pet or child named "Bear".', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29270);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('1. If your town has an equal number of bars and churches. 2. If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number. 3. If you know how to say Matanuska, Tokositna, Kichatna, Oshetna, Bodenburg and Muktuk. 4. If you think that ketchup is one of the seven main food groups. 5. If your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a motor home on the highway. 6. If your whole family wears mukluks to church on Sunday. 7. If you see people wearing camouflage at social events - including weddings and funerals.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29271);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My doctor says I have insomnia, but I''m not going to lose any sleep over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29272);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Entitled To One Phone Call Two teenagers were arrested for public lewdness and possession of marijuana when they were found naked, enjoying a joint on the edge of the fountain in the town square. The arresting officer, unable to reach their parents, gave them each one phone call. A half hour later, a man entered the station. The sergeant said, "I suppose you''re the kids'' lawyer?" "Nope," the chap replied. "I''m just delivering their pizza!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29273);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Jam and Marmalade? You can''t marmalade your dick up a 2 year olds ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29274);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The following is based off a true story. In my high school english class our english teacher Ms. Simoff had given us homework to do and if we didn''t do it we wouldn''t be allowed to watch a movie. The next day my friend Jason came in and told the teacher that he did not do his homework. The teacher sent him to another classroom to finish his work. When he asked why he was in trouble Ms. Simoff said, "Because you didn''t do what I asked you to last night." The class proceeded to burst into laughter.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29275);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A rich Texan told the president of the University of Texas, "I want to set you up with a billion-dollar endowment fund, with but one condition." "What''s the condition?" asked the U.T president. "I want you to give my horse an honorary degree. She''s served me faithfully for fifteen years and she deserves a B.T. degree, a Bachelor of Transportation." The president said, "I''ve got to consult my trustees. I''ll get back to you." The trustees debated an hour until one senior trustee, who had appeared to be napping during the whole discussion, said softly, "I think we should take his money and give the horse the degree." Another trustee piped up, "But wouldn''t you be embarrassed to give an honorary degree to a horse?" "Nope," said the old man. "In fact, it would be the first time I can remember that we gave an honorary degree to a whole horse!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29276);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple was sitting on their front porch one day when the husband said: "Whenever I get at mad at you, you never seem to get upset. How do you manage to control your temper?" "I just go and clean the toilet," his wife replied. "How does that help?" asked her husband. "I use your toothbrush."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29277);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Just in case you are having a rough day, here is a stress management technique recommended in all the latest psychological journals. The funny thing is that it really does work and will make you smile . . . 1. Picture yourself lying on your belly on a warm rock that hangs out over a crystal clear stream. 2. Picture yourself with both your hands dangling in the cool running water. 3. Birds are sweetly singing in the cool mountain air. 4. No one knows your secret place. 5. You are in total seclusion from that hectic place called "the world." 6. The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity. 7. The water is so clear that you can easily make out the face of the person you are holding underwater. There! See? It really does work . . . You''re smiling already.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29278);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Before he left on a business trip, the father took his young son aside. "Terence, I''m trusting you to take care of the family while I''m gone. You''re going to be the man of the house." Comprehending the gravity of the situation, Terence replied soberly, "In that case, I''m gonna need the remote."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29279);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Paddy tells Mick he''s thinking of buying a Labrador dog. "Oh, I wouldn''t if I were you!", says Mick. "Have you seen how many of their owners go blind?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29280);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('At a local college dance in Sweden, an American asked a local girl to dance. While they were dancing, he gave her a little squeeze, and whispered, "In America, we call this a hug." She replied, "Yaah, in Sveden ve call dis a hug, too." A little later, he gave her a peck on the cheek. "In America, we call this a kiss." She replied, "Yaah, in Sveden ve call dis a kiss, too." A few drinks later, they moved out to the campus lawn and had sex. "In America," he told her, "we call this a grass sandwich." She replied, "Yaaah, in Sveden ve call dis a grass sandwich, too, but ve put more meat in it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29281);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29282);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A twelve-year-old boy received a journal as a birthday gift. He looked at it carefully, but was mystified. "Mom, what''s the deal with this book? All the pages are blank," he asked. "That''s called a journal," she explained. "You write down interesting stuff that happens to you." His face brightened as he caught her drift. "So it''s kinda like a blog, only on paper?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29283);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Top Ten Signs you''re Not Watching a Real Baseball Team From Late Show with David Letterman; Monday, February 20, 1995 You recognize batter as the kid who sold you a hot dog a couple minutes earlier. Every time a player slides into second, he busts his hip. They keep shouting "Do over!" When umpire yells, "Strike 3!" batter looks at him as if the dude''s speaking French. Try as they might, they just can''t scratch themselves like professionals. First base: Siskel. Second base: Ebert. Game stops when some lady in a house near the stadium shouts "Dinner time!" Players constantly adjusting each other''s cups. You overheard the coach yelling, "Run, Forrest, run!" They play like the Mets.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29284);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the definition of perfect pitch? When you throw the accordion into the dumpster and it lands on the banjo. What is the definition of a quarter tone? Two oboes playing in unison. What do you call a guitar player who just broke up with his girlfriend?? Homeless. How do you know if the drum stand is level? There is drool coming out of both sides of the drummer''s mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29285);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: So class, in the medieval times, the Puritan''s ears were cut off if they didn''t attend Catholic services. Student: I bet they didn''t like the sound of that!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29286);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you do when you see a Mexican riding a bike? Throw a stone at him, it''s your bike!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29287);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why do blondes have litlle holes in their faces? From eating with forks!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29288);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This site is dead. There has been an all-time low in traffic. No one posts anymore. The end of the site is a tragic one, and I will miss the site. Wocka has fallen from its high branch. Submit your hate towards, but you know it''s true.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29289);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One fine day.... you''re just walking by.... You look at this bird.... it shits in your eye.... You don''t swear.... you don''t cry.... You just thank God.... that cows don''t fly....', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29290);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WHERE is my SUNDAY paper? the irate customer calling the newspaper office loudly demanded. "Madam," said the newspaper employee, "today is Saturday. The Sunday paper is not delivered until tomorrow, on SUNDAY." There was quite a long pause on the other end of the phone, followed by a sight of resignation as she was heard to mutter, "Well, fuck . . . I guess that''s why no one was at church today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29291);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Oedipus was a real motherfucker.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29292);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken and the road can''t agree on anything.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29293);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear the one about when the Great Recession began? The President appointed a cat to chair the Federal Reserve. Do you know why? Because when a cat falls, it always lands on its feet.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29294);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her U.S. Government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about. Bambi pondered the question, then finally said, "That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29295);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Knock knock. Who''s there? Granny. Granny who? Knock knock. Who''s there? Granny. Granny who? Knock knock. Who''s there? Granny. Granny who? Knock knock. Who''s there? Aunt. Aunt who? Aren''t you glad you got rid of all those grannies?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29296);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the Japanese steal the Diaoyu Islands? Because they don''t have enough room for their funny farms!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29297);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was having a serious surgical operation. When he woke up, he asked his doctor, "Did it go well?" "It went perfectly." "Then why do I have this headache?" "Oh, that. Halfway through the operation, we ran out of anesthetic."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29298);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the Swedish word for divorce and swearing? Ikea.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29299);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Since workaholics are people addicted to work and chocaholics are people addicted to chocolate, are catholics people addicted to cats?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29300);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I had a great memory once, but I don''t know where I left it. You haven''t seen it lying around anywhere have you? No? No what?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29301);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('As I always say, "REAL men don''t shave below the neck." Well, unless they are a body builder, I guess you have to show it off. Then again, it might be good for a boxer to be more slippery so punches have less "stick" or whatever. Yea, I guess it''s the same with kick boxers. Also, I guess porn stars have their reasons. And male models.... OK, I guess I meant that "REAL men don''t shave below the neck, unless they can beat me up, of course."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29302);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If you copy from your textbooks, it''s making good use of what you''ve learnt. If you copy from anywhere else, it''s plagiarism.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29303);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, after what felt like five days of after-school detention, I hailed a taxi - it was almost six, jeez. I opened the door and stepped inside. Making myself comfortable in the back seat, I told him my home address, without caring who the cabbie was. I sank into the seat, with a kind of uneasiness. What would mum do? Ground me for the next ten years? I checked my watch every fifteen seconds, and watched the traffic shooting by. About halfway down the road, the dumb cabbie slowed suddenly. Damn you, I thought. Before I could say anything, the cabbie turned to me. For a moment, I was frozen with fear. The cabbie was not half like anyone I''d seen before. His hair was the colour of fresh blood. His face, on the contrary, was white as a sheet. His cold eyes stared at me as if he was Count Dracula. *** Taking advantage of my momentary paralysis, he spoke. ''My name is Ronald McDonald.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29304);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s the difference between a water bottle and puberty? The water bottle hit Justin Bieber first.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29305);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('knock knock! whose there? yer mom oh come in!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29306);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s so ugly the bank had to turn its security cameras off when she came in.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29307);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('3 year old kid: "Guess what? Daddy got you a pway-station!" 7 year old kid: "Really??!! Where is it?" 3 year old: "It''s in p-one mile!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29308);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teenager: Dad, did you hear that Jake broke up with Taylor? Dad: Oh no, another album.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29309);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ivan Vakinov Kotcha Vakinov Isenya Vakinov', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29310);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Our new greengrocery is now starting! We feature lead-free gasoline, phosphorus-free washing powder, fluorine-free refrigerator, ..., and iodine-free salt.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29311);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s so easy, it makes pie look hard.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29312);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma''s like Geico: so easy a caveman could do it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29313);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma is so fat that when she rolled offa the bed, she rolled off BOTH sides. Yo momma is so fat that when she jumped for joy, she got stuck. Yo momma''s teeth are so yellow, I can''t believe it''s not butter. Yo momma''s so fat that when she wears a red shirt all the kids go "koolaid! koolaid!" Yo momma''s so fat that when I swerved to miss her, I ran outta gas. Yo momma''s so fat that when I tried to drive around her, I had to stop and ask for directions. Yo momma has so many chins that she keeps a bookmark in her mouth so she can remember where to stuff the food. yo mama is so stupid she sat on the tv and watched the couch xD Yo moma''s like a baby she sucks everything in sight Yo moma''s got more chins than a Chinese phone book...? yo momma so fat even dora couldn''t explore her', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29314);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dick Hurtz (Yeah, we heard ya.) Dick Assman (I wish that last name was superhero name.) Teola doing the Hula to Hawaii (The New Zealand girl who had that name got rid of it in court.) Rusty Kuntz (Ouch.) A. Fucks (Sorry forgot the first name.) (A Brazilian soccer player''s name.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29315);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Your mother used to go fishing in the Pacific ocean, but now she goes fission there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29316);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma soo fat she sat on a quarter and a booger popped out of George Washington''s nose', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29317);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy walks into a bar right at the top of the Grand Canyon. Another patron comes up to him and says "did you know the air currents in the canyon are so strong you can jump off and they pull you right back up?" "What?!" the man said "you must be drunk." "No really, watch this!" and he jumps into the Grand Canyon, and WHOOSH! flies back up. "That was amazing!" the second man said so the first guy does it again. Finally the second guy decides it really does work and goes for it. He jumps off and splatters on the ground. The first guy returns to the bar and the bartender says "Damn, Superman, you sure are a jerk when you''re drunk."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29318);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Superman was bored one day; he goes to see Batman, and he asks, "Do you want to go save the world?" "Sorry" Batman said. "Spring cleaning at the Batcave," so Superman goes to see the Green Lantern. "You wanna save the world?" he asks. "Can''t, ring has been acting up," Lantern said. Then, flying around the city, Superman sees Wonderwoman sitting on top of a building totally naked. Superman thinks to himself, knowing that he could fly down there, do his business and be gone before she realized what happened.(He doesn''t last very long), so he decide to go for it, flies down, has his fun, and is gone. Wonderwoman asks, "What''s wrong, Invisible Man?" "I don''t know but my ass hurts like hell!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29319);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The farmer had 3 daughters; Flo, Betty, and Sam. Each girl had a date that night, but being the overprotective father that he was he had to meet the guy first. so sitting there in his chair with a shotgun he meets the guys. the first walks up and says "Hi, I''m Joe, I''m here for Flo, we''re going to see the show, is she ready to go?" The farmer allows them to go off, and the next boy comes up. "Hey, my name is Petty, I''m here for Betty, we''re getting spaghetti is she ready?" The Farmer allows them to go. Now the last guy comes up. "Hi, I''m Chuck..." and BAM the farmer shoots him', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29320);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the joke about the blind gynecologist? She could "read lips."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29321);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was in his front yard mowing the grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut & stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps saying, ''YOU''VE GOT MAIL.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29322);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were all about to jump off a cliff. As they jumped, they would yell the name of what they wanted to turn into. The redhead went first. She yelled, "Hawk!" and she turned into a hawk and flew away. The brunette went next. She yelled, "Butterfly!" and she turned into a butterfly and flew away. The blonde went last. As she was about to jump, she tripped, and yelled, "Crap!" As she fell, she turned into a piece of poop.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29323);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('This is what happen to a boy and his father: Son: dad i want to marry. Father: who do you want to marry? Son: your mother. Father: why do you want to marry my mother? Son: because you also marry my mother. :)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29324);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lecturing teacher noticed a lack of enthusiasm in her class. Few were paying attention so she decided to make an announcement, "The person to answer this next question gets to go home." The students were all brought to attention and a buzz went over the room. Suddenly, a male student grabbed his bag nd threw it out the window. The entire class went quiet. The teacher said, "Who did that?!" with a sense of anger behind her voice. "Me," the male student replied. "Now I can go home for answering your question." So he walked out of the classroom.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29325);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Lady on telephone: "Hello sir, I want to meet & talk to you. You are the father of one of my kids." Guy (stunned!): Are you Sandra? No. Jenny? No. Amy? No. Betty? No. Lady (in confusion): "No sir, I''m your son''s class teacher."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29326);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Girl eagerly asks her boyfriend "Where is my birthday gift?" The boyfriend points to a sports car across the street and says "You see that beautiful and expensive Ferrari on the other side of the road?" Girl gets excited and screams, "Yeah!" Boy, also excitedly, says, "Well, I got you the same color nail varnish!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29327);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I used facebook for a few days and got addicted to it. I''ve been studying since I was 6. Why the hell am I not addicted to it?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29328);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee. The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him ''Father''." The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him ''Your Grace''." The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal . . . When he enters a room everyone says ''Your Eminence''." The fourth Catholic man then says, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him ''Your Holiness''." Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well . . .?" She proudly replies, "I have a daughter, slim, tall, 38D breast, 24" waist and 34" hips. When she walks into a room, people say, ''Oh My God.''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29329);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen. When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it''s probably obsolete. The first place to look for information is in the section of the manual where you least expect to find it. When the going gets tough, upgrade. For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction. He who laughs last probably made a back-up. A complex system that does not work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine. The number one cause of computer problems is computer solutions. A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want to do.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29330);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and the run on HBOS in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan. In the last 7 hours Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches. Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song, while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived. Samurai Bank is soldiering on, following sharp cutbacks, Ninja Bank is reported to have taken a hit, but they remain in the black. Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29331);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Husband messages his wife on his cellphone: Hi, wat R U doing honey? Wife replies: I''m dying Husband is delighted and jumps with joy, but texts: OMG! How am I gonna live without u? Wife replies: u idiot. I''m dying my hair Husband: *@&!#*/ English', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29332);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Guide - I welcome you all to Niagara Falls. This is the world''s biggest waterfall and the sound intensity of the waterfalls is so high that even 20 supersonic jet planes passing by cannot be heard. Now, I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagara Falls!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29333);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('one day boodler is walking down the street minding his own (porn) business when suddenly a shady figure drags him into the alley. the huge man rapes poor boodler with his freakishly large 20 inch cock. boodler squeals like a pig. no one comes to help or look as the town is familiar with the sound. you see, boodler goes around town butt naked every sunday squealing like a pig. and today happens to be sunday. no one helps the poor bastard. boodler can take so much cock up his ass all at once. so he faints although the raping continues. next day morning, boodler finds himself in an alley. poor pig limps. his ass sore from the joy ride last night. now you can see him submitting jokes on wocka trying to score some shit', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29334);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Cop to boy: Which of the two fighting in the street is your father? Boy: I don''t know. That''s what they''re fighting about!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29335);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Is anybody STILL ALIVE ON WOCKA?????? I KNOW THIS ISNT A JOKE BUT THIS WAY THE ONLY WAY TO GET YOUR ATTENTION! HELLOOOO.... WAS THAT AN ECHO ECHO ECHO?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29336);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Imagine that you are on an adventure in a jungle with your best friend. Your friend gets bitten (on his manhood) by a poisonous snake while he was peeing. There isn''t a hospital for hundreds of miles. The question is, will you SUCK the poison out or will you just watch him die?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29337);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What''s grosser than gross? A pile of dead babies in a trash can. What''s grosser than that? The one at the bottom is still alive. What''s grosser than that? He has to eat his way to freedom. What''s grosser than that? He goes back for more.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29338);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma was so fat, I was surprised that she could even jump!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29339);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('wocka is dead. no one comments anymore. no one submits jokes anymore. Can someone fix these glitches?- -when I write a comment and click on submit, half the time, the comment is not posted no matter how many times I try to re-post. -Even if I select "show all" for the full comments list, the hidden comments dont show up. wtf? I''m sorry this IS the only way I can get some attention since the forum is a ghost town.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29340);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mama is so fat when she jumped she fell through the ground!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29341);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo mamma is so fat it takes 1111111111111111111111111999999999thousand belts to fit her waist', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29342);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo-mamma is so fat shes fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29343);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, I bought a packet of air. I was surprised to find a few potato chips inside it. -Dedicated to Lays', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29344);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The only person in our town who can afford to go on a jaguar is a zoo-keeper.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29345);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple is sitting on the porch sipping wine. The wife says, "I love you." The husband says, "Is that you or the wine talking?" The wife replies, "It''s me, talking to the wine."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29346);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student aide, Sam found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn''t need Sam''s help to leave the hospital. After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let Sam wheel him to the elevator. On the way down Sam asked him if his wife was meeting him. "I don''t know," he said. "She is till upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29347);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the town''s preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was. Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children, "Go up there and take a look in the coffin and see if that''s your pa."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29348);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('It''s my wife''s birthday today so I went out earlier in the week and deliberately got her a present that I knew she''d hate. True to form she opened it, took one look and said, "What the fuck would I want with an xbox? I''m going to take this back to the shop and ask for a refund." I can''t wait to see her little face when she gets arrested for looting.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29349);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this old woman who heard a song called "Two Lips and Seven Kisses." She called up information after hearing the song on the radio to get the name of the record company. In dialing, she erroneously called up a gas station, and she asks, "Do you have "Two Lips and Seven Kisses?" The gas station attendant who answered the phone said, "No, but I have two nuts and seven inches!" So the woman asked, "Is this a record?" To which the man replied, "No, its average!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29350);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two doctors were in a hospital hallway one day complaining about Nurse Jenny. "She''s incredibly dumb. She does everything absolutely backwards." said one doctor. "Just last week, I told her to give a patient 2 milligrams of Percocet every 10 hours. She gave him 10 milligrams every 2 hours. He nearly died on us!" The second doctor said, "That''s nothing. Earlier this week, I told her to give a patient an enema every 24 hours. She tried to give him 24 enemas in one hour! The guy nearly exploded!" Suddenly, they hear this blood-curdling scream from down the hall. "Oh my God!" said the first doctor, "I just realized I told Nurse Jenny to prick Mr. Smith''s boil!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29351);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What a woman says... This place is a mess! C''mon! You and I need to clean up! Your stuff is lying on the floor and You''ll have no clothes to wear if we don''t do laundry right now! What a man hears... blah blah blah blah blah C''MON! YOU AND I blah blah blah blah! blah blah blah blah ON THE FLOOR blah blah blah NO CLOTHES blah blah blah blah blah blah blah RIGHT NOW!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29352);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A trucker goes into a whorehouse and hands the Madam five hundred dollars. He says, "I want your ugliest woman and a bologna sandwich." The Madam says, "For that kind of money, you could have one of my finest girls and surf and turf." The trucker says, "I''m not horny, I''m homesick."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29353);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('guy goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The girl behind the counter says, "What size?" He says, "I don''t know." She holds up a finger and says, "That big?" He says, "Bigger." She holds up three fingers and says, "That big?" He says, "Smaller?" She holds up two fingers and he says, "That''s it." She puts the two fingers in her mouth and says, "Medium."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29354);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man enters a barbershop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. "I have just the thing," says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. "Just place this between your cheek and gum." The client places the ball in his mouth and the barber proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced. After a few strokes, the client asks in garbled speech, "And what if I swallow it?" "No problem," says the barber. "Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29355);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old man in the nursing home got a bottle of wine for his birthday. He talked the old lady in the next room into sharing it with him. After they were both totally bombed, he started groping the old lady and pulling at her clothes. He managed to get her blouse and bra off before she stopped him. She said, "I can''t do this, I have acute angina". The old guy says "God, I hope so, you''ve got the ugliest tits I''ve ever seen."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29356);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Honest to God true story. Wife (yelling from upstairs): Honey, I''m naked and the dog is loose in the front yard! Husband (downstairs): Hold on, I''ll be right up! She didn''t appreciate the humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29357);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I just wrote this out of boredom. I do not care what you think. If you think this bad, I can''t help but say, "Go fuck yourself". A couple had been fighting for quite a while. The husband is just craving for sex. One night when they''re in bed: Husband: You know, it''s fun. Wife: Huh? Husband: It''s fun! Wife: What? What''s up with you all of a sudden? What''s fun? Husband: It''s fun! Wife: What is? Husband: IT''S fun! Wife: Grrr. Fuck you! Husband: YEAH, THAT!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29358);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('WIKIPEDIA: I know everything. GOOGLE: I have everything. FACEBOOK: I know everybody. INTERNET : You''re all nothing without me. ELECTRICITY: Keep talking, bitches!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29359);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Q: Why did the witch buy a computer? A: She needed the spellcheck', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29360);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama has one leg and a bicycle. Yo mama has 4 eyes and 2 pair of sunglasses. Yo mama has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it. Yo mama has one hand and a Clapper. Yo mama has green hair and thinks she''s a tree. Yo mama has one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you''re saying. Yo mama has 10 fingers--all on the same hand. Yo mama has a glass eye with a fish in it. Yo mama has a short leg and walks in circles. Yo mama has a short arm and can''t applaude. Yo mama has so many freckles she looks like a hamburger! Yo mama has three fingers and a banjo. Yo mama has a wooden leg with a kickstand on it. Yo mama has a bald head with a part and sideburns. Yo mama has a wooden leg with branches. Yo mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tounge is in jail.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29361);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo moma so fat and retarded that she thinks shes skinny.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29362);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Windows customer said when he closes his windows, they disappear.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29363);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mama is so FAT that when she turned around,it was her birhtday!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29364);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blond was seen walking in a local mall wearing nothing but shoes, a shirt and nothing else.'' When security stopped her and asked her what she thought she was doing, She replied, "I saw a sign that said take half off and save money."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29365);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: The reason why we see lightening before we hear thunder is because light travels faster than sound. Blonde student: How do you explain a CLAPPER?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29366);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Japanese and an American are sitting next to each other in an airplane. The Japanese turns to the American and says "We are so technically advanced that we have exact replicas of ourselves so we can be at two places at the same time". He continues, "Therefore, I can be at work and at the same time have sex with my wife." All this while the American stays silent, then suddenly gets up and starts shaking his hips back and forth. The Japanese, confused, asks "What the hell are you doing?" The American, still shaking his hips, replies "I''m fucking my wife via Bluetooth!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29367);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There are three moms. . A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde. They were all talking one day and the brunette says "Oh my gosh y''all I went through my daughter''s purse the other day to get some gum, and I found an ounce of weed. I can''t believe she smokes weed" They comfort her, and the redhead says "Yeah, well I found a fake I. D. In my daughter''s purse. I can''t believe she has one". So they all comfort her. Then the blonde says "That''s nothing. I found a condom in my daughter''s purse. I just cannot believe she has a penis"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29368);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night a man and woman went to his house to have sex when he stopped her to say "I still live with my parents and me and my brother share bunk beds so if you want to change positions say "lettuce" and if you want to go faster say "tomatos" So they were getting it on and she was screaming "lettuce, lettuce, tomatos, lettuce, tomatos, tomatos" Suddenly the younger brother (on the bottom bunk) said "Could you stop making sandwiches your getting mayonase on me"!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29369);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with three young mothers and their small children. "You all have obsessions," he observed. To the first mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You''ve even named your daughter Candy." He turned to the second mom. "Your obsession is money. Again, it manifests itself in your child''s name, Penny." At this point, the third mother got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, "Come on, Dick, let''s go', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29370);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a blonde goes into a store. She gets an item and walks up to the cashier. She says,"I''d like to buy this TV". He says,"Sorry, we don''t sell to blondes". The next day, she dyes her hair red and goes back in the store, but the same thing happens. Finally, she shaves her head and goes back in. When she tries to buy it for the third time, the man refuses. She says, "How the hell do you know I''m blonde?". He replied, "First of all, that''s a microwave."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29371);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''''Ugh, that''s the ugliest baby I''ve ever seen!'''' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''''The driver just insulted me!'''' The man says: ''''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I''ll hold your monkey for you.''''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29372);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me . . . then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29373);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day there was this man that went to a beach completely naked even though the beach was a non-nude beach. But the man thought and thought looking around. Nobody is here so he doesn''t care. He takes off his towel and lays down with a newspaper to cover his privates just in case. Soon comes a little girl that asks "Sir, what''s under the newspaper?" The man replies with "it''s a birdy and never ever touch it." He soon falls asleep. Later on when he wakes up, he''s in the hospital feeling immense pain around his private area. The doctors ask whathappened and all he could remember was the girl at the beach. Later on the cops arrive at her house asking what she had done. She said "well I was playing with the birdy but then it spit this white stuff at me. I got really mad. So I broke it''s neck, stepped on it''s eggs, and burned it''s nest."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29374);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('There was this lady and she really wanted to have sex, but she was to scared to ask her husband so she went to a gypsy and told her her problem. The gypsy rummaged around in a chest and pulled out a pickle jar with a penis in it, and said "All you have to do is open the jar and say ''Pickle penis my vigina'' and it will start having sex with you". So later she tries out the pickle penis and it works great. That is until her husband walks in and he shouts "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT" and the woman says "It''s a pickled penis" Unfortunately her husband replied "PICKLE PENIS MY ASS"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29375);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you kill a dumb blonde? Put something shiny on the bottom of a pool.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29376);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What s green and hangs from a tree??? Giraffe Boogers', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29377);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I knew a blonde that was so stupid that....... * she called me to get my phone number. * she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate." * she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind. *she tried to put M&M''s in alphabetical order. *she sent me a fax with a stamp on it. *she tried to drown a fish. *she thought a quarterback was a refund. *she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death. *she tripped over a cordless phone. *she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. *she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store. *she studied for a blood test. *she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats. *when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved. *when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead. *when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said"Airport Left" she turned around and went home', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29378);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Did you hear about the blonde that... Couldn''t learn to water ski because she couldn''t find a lake with a slope. Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said "2 to 4 years" Couldn''t call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button. When asked what the capital of California was; answered "C". Baked a turkey for 3 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 125. After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained that the other swimmers were using their arms.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29379);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don''t mind, but I feel much luckier when I''m completely nude." With that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!" As the dice came to a stop she jumped up and down and squealed... "YES! YES! I WON, I WON!" She hugged each of the dealers and then picked up her winnings and her clothes andquickly departed... The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I don''t know - I thought you were watching."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29380);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An elderly couple (BATTERY AND BOODLER) was attending mass. About halfway through, BOODLER leans over and says to BATTERY, "I just let out a silent fart; what do you think I should do?" BATTERY replied, "That was sexy. Put a new battery in your vibrator; then let''s go home and fuck our brains out."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29381);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The armies of the opposition have neared Washington, Paris and London. The governments of US, France and London did nothing about it. ''Sorry! We need to bomb (long list of African and Middle East countries) first.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29382);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges? - You can''t have everything, where would you put it? - Isn''t having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool? - What hair color do they put on the driv', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29383);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('On the eve of the First Boer War, thousands of blondes lined the streets campaigning for animal rights. ''If it''s illegal for human women, it''s gotta be the same for swine,'' said one activist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29384);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a fragment of a crossword puzzle. Note that this crossword puzzle contains abbreviations and acronyms. S O _ Clue: An insult related to a female animal. Answer: Sow.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29385);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Here is a fragment of a crossword puzzle. P _ O _ _ _ Clue: Something that is often brown and hard to clean. Answer: Poodle.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29386);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A lawyer is talking to a *fellow* politician. ''I''m going to Switzerland next month,'' said the honest politician. ''Oh really?'' asked the lawyer. ''Which bank?''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29387);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the father buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school? - Bison!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29388);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('If Bob the Butcher is 5''11'''' what does he weigh? -Meat', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29389);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A Martian lands to plunder, pillage and burn. He goes up to the owner of the first house he sees and says, "I''m a Martian just arrived from the other side of the galaxy. We''re here to destroy your civilisation, pillage and burn. What do you think about that?" The owner replies, "I don''t have an opinion. I''m a chartered accountant."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29390);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don''t? Depreciation.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29391);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A guy dies whilst making love to his wife. A few days later the undertaker calls her and says, "Your husband still has a hard-on, what shall I do with it?" The wife replies, "Cut it off and shove it up his ass!" The undertaker does as he is told. On the day of the funeral the wife visits her husband for the last time and sees a tear rolling down his face, so she whispers in his ear, "It fucking hurts doesn''t it!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29392);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three men go on holiday abroad together. The tourist office informs them that there is only one hotel in town with vacancies. The guys go along there, only to be told by receptionist at the hotel that there is just one available room left in the hotel. They are not happy, but as it is their only option, they take the room for one evening and share its only bed. That night, they all enjoy a good night''s sleep. In the morning, the guy on the right side of the bed says, "I dreamt I had the best wank last night." The guy on the left side says, "That''s funny, I had the exact same dream!". The guy in the middle says, "I dreamt I was skiing."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29393);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A blonde walks by a travel agency and notices a sign in the window, "Cruise Special -- $99!" So she goes inside, lays her money on the counter and says, "I''d like the $99 cruise special, please." The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room, ties her to a large inner tube, then drags her out the back door and downhill to the river, where he pushes her in and sends her floating. A second blonde comes by a few minutes later, sees the sign, goes inside, lays her money on the counter, and asks for the $99 special. She too is tied to an inner tube and sent floating down the river. Somehow drifting into stronger current, she eventually catches up with the first blonde. They float side by side for a while before the first blonde asks, "Do they serve refreshments on this cruise?" The second blonde replies,"They didn''t last year...."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29394);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A newlywed couple had just arrived in their honeymoon suite. After unpacking, the husband took off his pants. "Put these on," he said to his wife. She did and they were obviously much too large. "There''s no way I can wear these - they''re way too big," she said. "Good! Now you know who wears the pants in this family," replied the husband. Flustered, the wife removed her panties, and handing them to her husband said, "Put these on." The husband looked at the tiny panties and said, "There''s no way I can get into these." To which the wife replied, "You''re damn right! At least not until you change your attitude!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29395);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An Illinois man left the snowballed streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher''s wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen: Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Your Loving Husband. P.S. Sure is hot down here.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29396);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man, trying to understand the nature of God, asked Him, "God, how long is a million years to you?" God answered, "A million years is like a minute." Then the man asked, "God, how much is a million dollars to you?" And God replied, "A million dollars is like a penny." Finally, the man asked, "God, could you give me a penny?" And God said, "In a minute."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29397);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fact of life: After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says W T F', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29398);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An actual sign outside a house: The dog is okay. Beware of the owner', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29399);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The New York Times, among other papers, recently published a new Hubble Space Telescope photograph of distant galaxies colliding. Of course, astronomers have had pictures of colliding galaxies for quite some time now, but with the vastly improved resolution provided by the Hubble, you can actually see the lawyers rushing to the scene.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29400);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Doctor: What is it that brought you here? Patient: An ambulance. Why?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29401);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One time I was walking and I saw a deer then a turkey comes out and the turkey and deer interact by speaking in human words then all of a sudden a really bright light formed and the deer and turkey have fused to make a durkey a dear and turkey combined it has a head of a deer and the body of the turkey after that this was on the news and they said it could be seen from Africa(No permanent eye damage was reported)so then a passer by the next day(I was in that same area where the turkey and deer fused)took the durkey and that guy who ate it became that same turkey(The one the deer talked to before fusing)but the good ole friend the deer was gone that passer by became the turkey but the deer got eaten the normal way.This should keep you laughing for hours', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29402);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A spanish speaking person was eating breakfast they where having english muffins the rest of the family was English(The Spanish speaking guy was adopted)so he was eating an English muffin after that he tried to say Uno but instead was completely English Wierd', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29403);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went... then it dawned on me. Reading a book on levitation... couldn''t put it down. I should have been sad when I lost my flashlight... but I was de-lighted. I was wondering why the frisbee got bigger as it got closer to me... then it hit me. I gave away dead batteries... free of charge! I had amnesia once... maybe twice. See more: http://punraccoon.tumblr.com/', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29404);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('33% of men use their left hand to pee. 67% of men use their right hand. 89% wanted to know why I''m watching them pee.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29405);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day, a kindergarten teacher, who was incidentally blonde, gave everybody a set of crayons and told them to draw something with it. The teacher noticed that Little Johnny had drawn a sun enclosed in a box with rays shining out of it. ''Johnny,'' said the teacher with a confused look. ''Did your grandparents come from Japan?'' ''No, Macedonia,'' said the colour blind child.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29406);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('When you look up Yahoo! Answers on Yahoo! search, it tells you it''s deleted according to community guidelines. When you look it up on Google Search, it''s restored according to Google Cache''s workings.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29407);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My dog Minton has eaten my shuttle cock. Bad Minton!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29408);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The European union has decided the only way to avoid Greece defaulting on its debts is to replace the government and civil service with 300 Spartans !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29409);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Dreams are like underpants. You''ve got ''em, but you can''t prove you do by showing it to everyone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29410);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My wife and I were at an outdoor shopping mall, and I came across what I thought was a ''life-sized'' chess board. So I began playing chess solo. Ten moves in, my wife comes by and says, "Honey, that''s a crche!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29411);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the world''s sharpest thing? A fart! It goes through your pants without leaving a hole!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29412);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is striped and lays eggs? A chicken in jail!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29413);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Child: Mum, can I wear those really nice jeans with the hole in the knee to church? Mother: No honey, you can''t wear holy jeans to church!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29414);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Johnny, where is your homework? Johnny: Its on Facebook. I''ve uploaded a copy and tagged you. Please login and verify it later.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29415);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day Barney was driving his "Drugmobile" down the street and a cop pulled him over, said; "Something screwy is goin'' on here, hey don''t I know you!" and was about to put handcuffs on Barney but, Barney quickly said: "Oh crap, there''s a J-Walker" and ran away to his drug mobile. The cop said: "Come here J-Walker". "Works every time" Barney said as he drove away.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29416);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey, I saw you in Dunkin'' donuts yesterday!! You''re the one ordering triple chocolate, double vanilla, quadrupal cinnamon and double whip cream dounut filled with sprinkles.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29417);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Three blokes are driving around, drinking beers and having a laugh when the driver looks in the mirror and sees the flashing lights of a police car telling him to pull over. The other two are really worried. "What are we going to do with our beers? We''re in trouble!" "No," the driver says, "it''s OK, just pull the label off your bottle and stick them on your foreheads, and the bloke pulls over. The police officer then walks up and says, "You lads were swerving all around the road back there. Have you been drinking?" "Oh, no, officer," says the driver, pointing to his forehead, "We''re trying to give up, so we''re on the patch."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29418);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A beautiful, sexy, good looking lady was sitting next to a guy in a plane... The lady said to him, "Can you help me remove something from my breast please?" The exciting young man replied, "Wow! It will be my pleasure... So what is it?" "Your eyes, idiot!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29419);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I think my smartphone is broken. I keep pressing the Home button, but I''m still working.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29420);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Old Bubba was fishing along the Bayou for catfish one day when he spots a water moccasin slithering across the water with a toad in its mouth. Being a longtime fisherman, he knows the best bait for large catfish are toads. In a flash, Bubba grabs the snake from behind and carefully removes the toad from its mouth and puts the toad in his side bag. Fearing the angry snake would bite him; Bubba grabs his bottle of daddy''s moonshine from his pocket and carefully pours 2 drops into the snake''s mouth. The snake''s eyes glaze over and quickly go limp. Bubba carefully places the snake back in the water. A few hours later, Bubba is just about to head back home, when he feels something tapping on his leg. He looks down and is amazed to see the same water moccasin with 2 frogs in its mouth.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29421);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29422);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Every time I hear the dirty word "Exercise", I wash my mouth out with chocolate.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29423);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Today''s school kids are spending less time at recess than their predecessors. Experts say if the trends continues, future Congressmen may not have enough experience goofing off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29424);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Sitting next to each other on a plane are a blond woman and a lawyer. To make the plane ride a bit more interesting, the lawyer suggests that he and the blond play a game. "We each take turns asking a question, and if you answer wrong you must give me $5 and if I answer wrong I give you $5." The blond woman says nothing. "Okay," says the man, "if I answer wrong, I have to give you $50, but if you answer wrong you only have to give me $5." "Alright," says the blond, "you go first." The man asks her "what is the distance from Earth to the nearest star?" the woman says nothing and hands $5 to the man. "What has five legs, is covered in pink and purple spots, and lives on a hill?" The lawyer, never having heard this riddle, gave the woman $50. "Wait," he said, "what is the answer to that question?" Without saying a word, the woman hands him $5.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29425);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('An old lady walks into a bank and says, "I would like to set up an account." The man at the desk says, "Okay, how much would you like to deposit?" The woman replies, "$5,000." "Wow!" says the man, "where did you get all of that?" "I like to make bets." "What type of bets?" The woman replied, "Tomorrow when, I will come in, you will have a butterfly tattoo an your left buttock. I will bet all the money I am about to deposit." "Deal," says the man. The next day the old woman walked in again with her lawyer. the man at the counter pulled down his pants to show the old woman his empty left buttock. "I win!" he said as the woman handed him his money. Behind her, the lawyer put his head in his hands. "What''s wrong with that guy?" he asked. The old woman replied, "He is just a sore loser. I bet him $10,000 that the man at the counter of this bank would moon us."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29426);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man was solving a crossword. For a four-letter word there was a clue: Look at the picture ! The man entered: I see .', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29427);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- How many blonds do you need to change a lightbulb ? - Hundred. One holds the lightbulb and the other ninety nine rotates the house.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29428);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- What does a blond say to a two headed monster ? - Hello ! Hello !', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29429);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('- How to make a blond busy ? - Put her in a circle room and tell her to find a corner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29430);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES (NULL, '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29431);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('there was a man who lived in a small town who did not talk much to his neighbors. the only thing they knew about him was the fact that he always had the precise time, because every day at 3:00 pm (no later, no sooner) he took a walk, and came back at exactly 3:30 pm (no later, no sooner). this man was always so perfectly on time that everyone set their clocks to him, including the clock tower. one day one of the man''s neighbors walked up to the old man and asked, "how do you keep your clocks so precise?" "simple," replied the old man, "i just set it to the old clock tower." who''s clock was set off whose?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29432);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Michael and Beth are married, Beth is a smoker but Michael thinks smoking is horrible. One night she started smoking after they finished having sex and Michael said, "Would you please stop smoking, you''re going to kill yourself." Beth, in return, said, "Sometimes I just need to get in a smoke after sex, do you have a problem with that?" He replied, "Yes, because they stunt your growth among other things." Beth asked Michael if he''s ever smoked, to which he proudly said no. With a smug Beth lowered her gaze to his groin and said, "So, what''s your excuse?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29433);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover? The position of the dirt bag.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29434);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why is divorce so expensive? Because it''s worth it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29435);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a room together? 100 people who don''t do dick.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29436);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29437);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two mates calles mik and mak went to the Australia vs England game. It was mik`s birthday, and mik gave mak a ride and mak took mik`s birthday present with him.He went to get it while mik wached the 4th over. Mak said to mik i`ve got some bad news for you buddy. Your car was actually a car bomb and blew up...but mik interupted by saying Well makky, mate I`ve got some bad news for you. what? mak asked. Ricky ponting`s out,he replied', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29438);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mama''s so fat that when she took her first step everyone thought there was an earthquake.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29439);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo Mamma so ugly when she looked at a baby, the baby turned to stone.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29440);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many blondes does it take to put in a light bulb? 1000. 1 to screw in the light bulb; 1 to give the light bulb to the person who''ll screw in a light bulb and 998 to find the light bulb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29441);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How do you keep a blonde busy? Write with a sharpie and tell her to erase it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29442);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How can you tell if someone is a true blonde? They clean their hair with air conditioner.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29443);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know the Chinese nickname for the Dutch politician Geert Wilders? Answer: Dum Thing!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29444);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My girl told me she was trying to lose weight, so I said, "Do whatever makes you happy inside. Just keep in mind that your weight''s just a number. There''s no number in the world to measure how beautiful you are . . . unless you include negative numbers."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29445);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old she met a T Rex in pre-school.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29446);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard about the sauna that serves food? Their specialty is steamed mussels.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29447);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('god told moses to come forth but he tripped on a banana peel and came fifth', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29448);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Class was starting, and the teacher was taking attendance. She noticed that two of her top students were missing. Right after that, Billy came in. She asks him, "Why are you late?" He replies, "I was just on top of Blueberry Hill." The teacher tells him to sit. A few minutes later Timmy comes in. The teacher asks him, "Why are you late?" He replies, "I was just on top of Blueberry Hill." She tells him to sit. A few minutes later a new girl walks into class. The teacher says, "Oh you must be the new girl. What''s your name?" The girl replies, "I''m Blueberry Hill."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29449);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Whoever said nothing is impossible has never tried slamming a revolving door.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29450);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mamma is so fat she walked into the GAP and filled it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29451);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Sixteen. One to screw it in and fifteen to form a support group.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29452);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Santa only has three Ho''s.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29453);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I saw on the news a little boy being carried up to the sky. I got scared cause I thought Michael Jackson was ordering take-out from Heaven.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29454);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A couple was driving down the street and they hear a siren going off. They pull over to the side and wait for the cop to come over. The cop comes up and they see that it''s Officer Alf. The man groans cause Alf is the rudest cop in town. Alf asks the man for his license and registration. The man gives it to him and Alf rudely rips it out of his hands and tells the man to wait. When he comes back he sneezes and his face turns red. The man says bless you and asks why his face is so red. Alf replies, "I get this way when it''s about to rain. Anyway, here is your ticket for speeding." He walks away gruffly. The man looks up to see nothing but a clear blue sky. He starts driving again; a few minutes later it starts to pour down. He arrives home grumbling. His wife turns to him and says, "I guess rude Alf the red knows rain dear."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29455);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hitler walks into a bar; he''s depressed. He goes up to the counter and orders three shots. The bartender gives them to him and Hitler downs them. Hitler orders three more shots; the bartender gives them to him and Hitler downs them. Hitler orders three more shots. The bartender asks Hitler why he''s so depressed. Hitler replies, "Give me the shots and I''ll tell you," so the bartender gives him the shots and he downs them. Then the bartender asks why he''s so depressed. Hitler replies, "I just killed six millions Jews and a clown." The bartender replies, "Why a clown?" Hitler says, "See? Nobody cares about the Jews!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29456);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A brunette, a redhead and a blonde all apply for the same job. The manager says, "I can only hire one of you so I''m going to ask you each a question and whoever answers it correctly gets the job." He takes the brunette into the room and asks her, "How many D''s in Indiana Jones?" She replies, "One." He brings the redhead into the room and asks her the same question. She thinks for a moment and says, "One." He then brings the blonde into the room and asks her the same question; "How many D''s in Indiana Jones?" She thinks for a little. She counts on her fingers, counts on her toes, wiggles her ears, sticks out her tongue and finally comes up with, "Thirty Six." The rest of them ask her, "How the hell did you come up with thirty six?!" She replies with a smile on her face, "Da da da da, da da da." (Sing the Indiana Jones theme song)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29457);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Santa Claus, a Boy Scout, and a smart blonde jump out of a plane. Who lands first? The Boy Scout, because the other two don''t exist.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29458);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The Pope, the smartest man in the world, a father, and a son were in a plane that was going to crash. There were only three parachutes in the plane. The Pope says to them, "I need a parachute because I am worshiped by many people of religion." So he takes a parachute and jumps. The smartest man in the world says, "I am the smartest man in the world so I deserve a parachute." He takes a parachute and jumps. The father then looks at the son and says, "I have lived a long life and I think you should take a parachute because you have so much to live for." The little boy looks at the dad and says, "It''s alright daddy. We can both go. The smartest man in the world took my backpack."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29459);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('How many Dominicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. Dominican one to hold the bulb and Dominican two to turn Dominican one', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29460);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Teacher: Billy, tell me the periodic for water. Billy:Okay. H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O. Teacher: What makes you say that? Billy: You said it was H to O.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29461);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you get if you cross a dinosaur, a tiger, a crocodile, a spider, and a elephant? I don''t know but you better get out of it''s way!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29462);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What happens to you if you can not read? Well, since you''ll probably be staying in Kindergarten, less homework!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29463);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Joe:Why did the cow cross the road? Bob:The chicken quit. Joe:why did the chicken quit? Bob: He wanted a job that would give him more buck-buck-bucks. Joe: Hey! Why is why is that duck crossing the road? Bob: I don''t know. Maybe the cow qu- Hey! Why am I talking to you? I don''t even know you! Joe: Why don''t you kno- Bob: Shut up!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29464);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Ever since Rhianna got dumped by her boyfriend, she put all the stuff that was his or made her remember him she put : " to the left to the left... in the box on the left..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29465);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Science Teacher: Now, now class settle down. Today we will be learning about Biology. Girl: Oh boy! An entire unit about buying! I''ve bought a lot of things like earrings, and rings, and necklaces, and bracelets... Math Teacher: Okay class. Today we will be learning about subtraction. Boy: Hooray! I know everything there is to know about sub tracks because my father owns a train station. did you know that sub tracks are like regular tracks but...', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29466);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Basketball hoops are like misdemeanor. The more I miss it da meanor I get.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29467);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A boy and his mom were playing the new game of life were you could put your house were you wanted it. The boy put it on the left side. On his next turn he moved it onto the right side. The mom asked why he did that and he said, "I wanted to live on the other side of life."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29468);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the 12 watt lightbulb drop out of school? It wasn''t very bright.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29469);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Register lots of accounts, with each account voting for it as least comedy. If its average comedy drops below 0.5, it will be automatically deleted.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29470);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Trousers: Hot off the press . . . . / - - - I regret writing that. Remorse Code Does anyone here have a giant catapult? No? It was a long shot.. Saw two space hoppers outside a nightclub. I said: ''Who are you?'' They said: ''We''re the bouncers'' I had a TV Show about trees. But it got axed. What do you get if you cross a human with a dog? Arrested. I can speak to kettles. Because I''m boilingual. Saw an artist dressed all in black. It was Vincent Van Goth. Hotel receptionists are bit inappropriate, aren''t they? They all just sit there, checking people out. My girlfriend said: "Why do you always lie?" I said: "Because it''s easier than standing up" I think I got a phone-call about the world''s worst queue. It was a very bad line', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29471);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Breaking News! Daisy the Dalmation is entering the presidential election along with Mitt Romney and Barack Obama.Right now we are going to hear her campaign speech. " Voting for your next president will be very difficult to chose so let me make it easier. You can vote for the white guy or the black guy. You vote for me you get both.!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29472);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Al Gore is out jogging one morning, notices a little boy on the corner with a box. Curious, he runs over to the child and says, "What''s in the box kid?" To which the little boy says, "Kittens, they''re brand new kittens." Al Gore laughs and says, "What kind of kittens are they?" "Democrats," the child says. "Oh that''s cute," Al Gore says and he runs off. A couple of days later Al Gore is running with his buddy Bill Clinton and he spies the same boy with his box just ahead. Al Gore says to Bill, "You gotta check this out," and they both jog over to the boy with the box. Al Gore says, "Look in the box Bill, isn''t that cute? Look at those little kittens. Hey kid tell my friend Bill what kind of kittens they are." The boy replies, "They''re Republicans." "Whoa!", Al Gore says, "I came by here the other day and you said they were Democrats. What''s up?" "Well," the kid says, "Their eyes are open now."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29473);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is it called when your pet snake doesn''t feel right? -reptile dysfunction.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29474);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('what''s the difference between here and there? The letter T! :) (Take away the T in there and you''ve got here!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29475);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A gay pornstar doesn''t take as many balls to the face as my 4 year old son playing soccer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29476);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One day I was standing in the park wondering how frisbees get bigger when they get closer. Then it hit me.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29477);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mary had a little lamb, fries and a coke.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29478);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the butcher', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29479);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mik: "Do skunks have a good sense of smell?" Mak: "No! If they did, they''d jump off a cliff!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29480);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A waiter on a ship said to a boarding lion "sir, do you want anything of the chef''s special?" The lion said "nah..I''ll look at the passenger list,though!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29481);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why didn''t Megan Fox run from the man-eating lion? Because she was a woman. *Told to me by a 7-year-old*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29482);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mik:Darn it! There''s only 2 chips in my bowl.Damn you,chips! Mak: Aargh! you made me so angry I am gonna punch them! Mak punches the chips. Mik: WHOAH! you made 2 big chips into 20 small ones! Mak: I AM JESUS OF THE DORITOS!!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29483);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Music student: We played the beatles last night! Gym student:who won?', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29484);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The other day, I heard that a good friend of mine was outside during a thunderstorm and got struck by lightning. I was a bit shocked, but not as much as he was.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29485);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I don''t know much about prison, but it sounds like a pain in the ass.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29486);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night, I was just walking around, and something really strange happened. Every single black person that night took one look at me and decided to punch me square in the face. Repeatedly. It hurt. And I''m not just talking about one or two, I''m saying every single black person beat the crap out of me that night. I don''t know why. I didn''t do anything. I didn''t say anything. I didn''t even look at anybody funny. But after that, I did stop dressing up as a ghost for Halloween.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29487);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One night I was feeling lonely, so I went to my girlfriend''s house. She wasn''t expecting me, but I was able to calm her down. She was a bit hesitant, but I didn''t think anything of it. I got her into the bed finally, and you know what happens next. In the morning, when I woke up she was still asleep. So I got up and left quietly. On the way back home I felt a little bad but I didn''t know why. And then it hit me. I don''t have a girlfriend.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29488);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo momma so old she rode a limosarus to her wedding!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29489);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I''m not even sure this is funny (although it was at the time), but it was just a random happening: I was texting my friend and playing temple run at the same time, and something occurred to me. I said, "If I were a Temple Run character, no one would buy me... I cannot slide on my back, jump over tall objects, run fast (most definitely not), or pick up coins by running through them. I would die in the first 30 seconds." He replied, "I would buy u, just so I could get the achievement of sexy seven."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29490);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Little Katie was at Sunday school one day. The teacher asked the class "Who is someone in your life that worships God by always speaking His name?" Little Katie raised her hand and said "The fifth grade teacher at my school! Every time we pass by her room on the way to art I hear her say "I swear to God I have the worst behaved class in the world!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29491);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mom! Deaf kids at school are making fun of me. "What did they say?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29492);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Billy was walking in a shopping center with his mom, and suddenly she stopped to pick up a penny. When she reached out for it, he saw armpit hair. Frightened, he said, "You''re not my mom! I''m calling the police." The man pulled off his mask and said, "Okay, you got me. But tell me one thing. How did you know I wasn''t your mom?" "Because my mom''s not Jewish."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29493);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I got a new dog last week. She''s a black lab and border collie mix, and still a puppy. I take her with me everywhere I go. But when I took her to the vet to get her shots, they told me I had to put her down. I''ve only had this dog for a week. Seven days. I wanted to keep holding her.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29494);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why was the diver angry at the diving board? Because it flipped him off.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29495);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('So I asked a religious truck driver what his CB handle is. His answer: "My handle''s ''Messiah''." (Get it? Sounds like "Handel''s Messiah.")', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29496);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The word ''function'' should never function as a verb.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29497);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('''It is Christmas time and a man and a woman go out for a meal. After the first two courses, everything is well until the dessert. The man messes up and says something inappropriate to the woman while having their Christmas pudding. The woman walks away in anger. Then the man says, "Please don''t desert me; this is our first date."''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29498);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mik and mak are having a pillow fight. Mak whacks mik hard. Mik yells "are you jamaican because ja maican me crazy!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29499);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('yo momma is so fat, she put on a disney shirt and mickey mouse got diabetes. yo momma is so ugly, she makes blind people cry. yo momma is so fat, she has to hire people to look at her toes. yo momma is so fat, when God said let there be light, he had to ask her to move out of the way. yo momma is so stupid, she failed a blood test.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29500);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('I bet you I could stop gambling.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29501);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Have you heard the one about the home security guard who got fired for saving his boss''s life? One day the guard dreamed the his boss was going to be in a plane crash on a business trip to Zimbabwe. Upon learning that his boss was soon going to be flying to Zimbabwe he told his boss about the dream he had, and convinced his boss to cancel it. The next day on the news they learned that the plane did indeed crash. The boss gave him a reward, and then fired him on the spot, saying that a good guard shouldn''t be sleeping on the job!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29502);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young man was strolling down a street. As he passed a large building with a fence around it, he heard a group of people chanting "Thirteen, thirteen, thirteen" over and over again. Curious, he tried to see over the fence, but couldn''t. Then he spotted a hole in the wood. He put his eye to the hole. He just managed to spy some old people sitting in deckchairs chanting, before a finger came out of nowhere and poked him in the eye. As he staggered back, the old people started chanting, "Fourteen, fourteen, fourteen..."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29503);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A mother and her child were at a wedding. A little boy looks at his mom and says, "Mommy, why does the girl wear white?" His mom replies, "The bride is in white because she''s happy and this is the happiest day of her life." The boy thinks about this, and then says, "Well then, why is the boy wearing black?"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29504);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A young boy, about eight years old, was at the store picking out a large box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over and, trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do. "Oh, no laundry," the boy said. "I''m going to wash my dog." "But you shouldn''t use this to wash your dog. It''s very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he''ll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him." But the boy was not stopped by this and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his dog. About a week later the boy was back in the store doing some shopping. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing. "Oh, he died," the boy said. The grocer said, "I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your dog." "Well," the boy replied, "I don''t think it was the detergent that killed him." "Oh I''m sorry. How did he die?" "I think it was the spin cycle."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29505);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on an interstate road for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through his hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80mph, he suddenly saw a flashing red and blue light behind him. "There ain''t no way they can catch a Mercedes," he thought to himself, and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, 100 110 and finally 120 with the lights still behind him. "What on earth am I doing?" he thought and pulled over. The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car. "I''ve had a tough shift and this is my last pull over. I don''t feel like more paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven''t heard before you can go!" "Last week my wife ran off with a cop," the man said, "and I was afraid you were trying to give her back!" "Have a nice night," said the officer.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29506);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A man walks into a bar one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer. "Certainly, sir, that''ll be 1 cent." "ONE CENT!" exclaimed the guy, the barman replied "Yes." So the guy glances over at the menu, and he asks "Could I have a nice juicy T-Bone steak, with chips, peas, and a fried egg?" "Certainly sir,"replies the bartender, but all that comes to real money." "How much money?" inquires the guy. "Four cents", he replies. "FOUR cents!" exclaims the guy. "Where''s the Guy who owns this place?" The barman replies, "Upstairs with my wife." The guy says, "What''s he doing with your wife?" The bartender replies, "Same as what I''m doing to his business."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29507);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter, and you didn''t even pay for your sandwich!". "Hey, man, I''m a PANDA!". the panda shouts back. "Look it up!". The manager opens his dictionary and reads: ''Panda: a tree-dwelling mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves.''', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29508);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Mik walked home from work and saw 4 people dressed in grim reaper suits. He ran home. The next time,the next time and 6 more walks for home, he decided to confront them. He yelled "who ARE you"????!!! They chased him into a wall. "s-s- Show yourself" he squeaked. They took their masks off and yelled "Hi, we''re the wiggles!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29509);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why wasn''t Jesus born in Japan? He couldn''t find three wise men or a virgin there.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29510);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Why did the computer get sick? He left his windows open', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29511);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('My Dad is great at raising kids, if he can remember which are his.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29512);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('All women are emotional drag queens, and i married their queen', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29513);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Yo mommas so fat that when she got on the electric scales, it read one at a time please.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29514);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What do you call a blind German? A not see!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29515);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Long ago I gave my kid an iPod. Last year he talked me into buying him an iPhone. This year he said he needed an iPad. I asked what the i- means and he said that''s the way Apple name their products. Now he''s asking for an i7 laptop. My goodness, Apple have made so many things they''ve now run out of names!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29516);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Boy: Will you marry me? Girl: Are you kidding? You''re a geek while I need a man with a big bank account and a nice house! Boy: I have 1000 GBs in the cloud. Girl: Come on, that won''t even buy us a cabin in Texas! Boy: You don''t know sh*t, my EC2 account can buy a farm in New York if you wish!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29517);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Two guys are eating a hamburger at a fast food place. 1st Guy- Does your hamburger taste funny? 2nd Guy- No just yours. Mine doesn''t have a sense of humor.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29518);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('One woman to another woman Woman- Those firemen are hot. Other Woman- Yeah they are nice looking. Woman- No. I mean they just came out of that burning building. They''re hot.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29519);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What did the dog say to the driver who was driving behind him? Get off my tail!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29520);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Man says to his girlfriend You''re the only woman on this planet I won''t. Oh by the way, I''m taken a trip to Mars next week.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29521);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(I put the pun words in CAPS) A man was smoking in a no smoking restaurant. Mik went up to him and said "sir, you''ll have to leave''. The smoker said to mik "what if I dont wanna, yeah?, what''ll ya do then?" Mak walked up to the smoking man''s face and said ''leave. this is a no smoking restaurant. no BUTTS about it". The man said "fine" and walked out and jumped on his bike. Mik said to mak " man, has that bike been through a RECYCLING machine"? Word spread, and no smokers smoked in that restaurant ever again.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29522);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('What is a 4 letter sport that starts with a T? Golf. (Golf starts with a tee!)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29523);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Do you know what the secret of an islamic marriage is? The man get''s to see a striptease every night!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29524);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Hey! Football team! Get off the band field!', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29525);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Band Class is the only class where you can blow it.', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29526);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('The blond asked for peanuts on the plane, but she once she got them, she gave them back to the stewardess and asks her to check if there really are peanuts in the bag. The stewardess asks why, to which the blond responds: "The bag says ''May Contain Nuts''"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29527);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('You''ve Got The Wrong(est) Number (Note: our customer support number is close to a local driving school''s number.) Me: "Thank you for calling. How may I help you?" Customer: "How much for my daughter?" Me: "Um..." Customer: "She''s 16. It''s her first time. She needs training." Me: "Sir, I think you want the driving school." Customer: "Oh, what do you guys do?" Me: "Adult websites." Customer: "Oh...OH! Oh my God!"', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29528);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(A teen approaches my cash register very slowly.) Me: "Can I help you?" Customer: "Gimme all the f***ing medicine!" (The teen pulls out an airsoft pistol with orange tip still glued to the front.) Me: "The pharmacy is in the back of the store." Customer: "Oh...okay." (He holsters the air-soft gun in his belt and darts down the aisles to the back of the store. My manager comes out of the back room because of the commotion.) Manager: "Who was that?" Me: "Some kid looking for drugs. He went back to the pharmacy." Manager: "Why didn''t you call the police?" (The teen runs screaming from the back of the store out of the front door followed closely by the pharmacy technician, a 35 year old boxer built like a fridge.) Me: "Doug started working today."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29529);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Employee: *making out a rain check* "Okay, so I''m just going to look on the computer and check if any other locations have this item." Nice customer: "Okay, thanks." Angry customer: "Stop f***ing socializing and do your g**d*** job!" Employee: "Sir, please don''t be abusive, I''m just checking our other loc-" Angry customer: "I don''t care! DO YOUR JOB!" (At this point, the angry customer moves toward the counter in a very threatening way. The customer behind HIM, a super-fit guy in a UFC jacket, steps in. Mr. UFC grabs the angry customer in a CHOKE HOLD and drags him outside, followed quickly by management, and to the applause of the staff and customers inside the store.) (The angry customer was banned from the store and Mr. UFC got a gift card.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29530);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(Often I enter the beer cooler with shorts, a t-shirt and some rubber-hand work gloves on.) Me: *walks out of the cooler* Customer: "Are you f***ing insane? It''s freezing in there. Me: "I don''t mind it." Customer: "That''s bulls***! You know it''s cold. Why would you lie to me?" Me: "Excuse me? I''m pretty sure I know my own tolerance and I''m working so I get a bit warm, even in there." Customer: "WARM!? In a COOLER!? You''re a G**D*** LIAR! How can you be WARM in THERE!" Me: "I''m Canadian, and ever since my igloo melted I only feel at home in there." Customer: "Oh, I didn''t know. I''m sorry for your loss."', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29531);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(A man comes to my register with a mint chocolate candy bar.) Me: "Anything else?" Customer: "Can you break a $100 bill?" Me: "Actually, I can''t. We just opened and I haven''t gone to the bank today." Customer: "Oh, no! Do you know anywhere I can get change? I need this candy right away!" (At this point I notice his panicked look. Coupled with the fact that he''s buying the most unappetizing candy in the store, I jump to a conclusion.) Me: "Sir, these aren''t for you, are they?" Customer: "No." Me: "Did your pregnant wife send you out at 8 in the morning to buy this candy?" Customer: "Yes." Me: "For the love of God, man! Get these home to her before you''re in even more trouble! You can come back and pay me later!" (The customer bolts out the door. He later came back, visibly calmer, and paid.)', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29532);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('(I am shelving DVDs in a library when a man comes in with a boy who appears to be autistic. The boy sees a movie about Thanksgiving.) Boy: "Thanksgiving! I love Thanksgiving! I''m thankful... I''m thankful for... I''m thankful for my friends at school!" Caretaker: "You''re thankful for your friends at school?" Boy: "Yeah! Yeah and... and... what are you thankful for? Are you thankful for your friends?" Caretaker: *no response* Boy: "Are you thankful for me?" Caretaker: "I''m thankful for you, kid. I''m more thankful for you than all my friends in the world." Boy: *smiles*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29533);
INSERT INTO "corrade-eggdrop-joke"("data", "name", "firstname", "lastname", "id") VALUES ('Customer: "Are you Hispanic?" Me: "No." Customer: "Middle Eastern?" Me: "No." Customer: "Egyptian?" Me: "No." Customer: "What are you?" Me: "Chinese." (customer puts on offended face) Customer: "I don''t appreciate you treating me like I''m dumb." Me: "Excuse me? I''m being honest." Customer: "NO CHINESE PERSON WOULD EVER HAVE EYES AS BIG AS YOURS!!!" Me: *mouth wide open*', '[Wizardry and Steamworks]:Support', 'Ectogram', 'Resident', 29534);